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whoslaurapalmer · 3 years

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so i never do this but i put a lot of thought into really specific details about the structure and scene layout of (the three-part folding mirror) and i really really really want to talk about it so here are some of my notes and some general commentary

-the crux of the fic, at least the way i had envisioned it, is what vfd does to family, how it becomes biological family vs the family created by vfd

-what vfd did to specific families: -physically separated the calibans -morally separated the denouements and the snickets -somehow brought the anwhistles closer together

-in terms of ramona and olaf, ramona was there to stress the distinction of biological family vs. vfd family but also how they’re so inextricably intertwined with each other, and olaf, this is harder to tell bc he doesn’t have a point of view here, but olaf is scoping out potential candidates for his personal group of firestarters – his own sort of “family” (ramona bc she’s a duchess, ernest because he has a similar line of thought, josephine because her husband is working with the mushrooms, the white-faced women because, well they wind up in his troupe and I have very vague headcanons about how that happens)

-related; the reason frank asks olivia about miranda at the end is because, at that point in the fic, frank feels so terrible about what he said to ernest that he’s trying to reassure himself that his family is still okay because (dewey’s right) at least they’re together, compared to the calibans, who haven’t seen each other in years. it was one of the first ideas I had when I was jotting ideas down in april and it stuck with me the whole way through. I really wanted it in there. I went back and forth before I got to this plot, though, on whether or not frank or ernest would be the one asking it. but I think it fits frank. -(ahahahahahaha the kicker being that miranda really was at the party the whole time and olivia didn’t recognize her) -anyway

-the parallels in the fic were: -the denouements start the fic together, and end the fic alone (by being honest about how they feel about each other) -the snickets start the fic relatively separated, and end the fic together (by being dishonest about what happened during the party) -the denouements start the fic by playing their game, and the snickets end the fic with theirs -frank is mistaken for ernest, ernest is mistaken for frank -frank pretends to be ernest on accident, ernest pretends to be frank on purpose -dewey has never slammed a door in his life; towards the end of the fic he slams the tray -i….think that’s all of them. I think

-character-wise, jacques and frank both see themselves as the people holding their families together; when in fact for the denouements, it’s dewey, which I think is clear in this, and for the snickets it’s lemony, which is less clear here? but definitely something I agree with -dewey and kit see themselves as the most ‘normal’, and they both have relatively solitary positions of acquiring information -ernest and lemony clearly both vibe on a ‘question vfd’ wavelength -i was also interested in kit and ernest, as siblings who feel stifled by an older/perceived older sibling, and dewey and lemony, who are sometimes unnecessarily protected by their siblings because they are the youngest/perceived youngest -this doesn’t show up in the fic bc olaf’s parents are still alive, but I thought ramona and olaf were also interesting foils re: reacting to their parent’s deaths

-some narration notes: -frank never refers to ernest and dewey as his brothers, except in the scene where he argues with ernest. because frank doesn’t necessarily see the split of biological family vs vfd family but has definitely swayed more to vfd family -ernest and dewey always refer to each other as brothers. -similarly, frank refers to the members of vfd as associates, most everyone else refers to them as friends. -ernest refers to vfd as strictly VFD because he’s distanced himself from it, while everyone else calls it ‘the organization’ -frank doesn’t swear even in his narration when he’s thinking them and not saying them because it’s, still his narration. he still wouldn’t quite completely say the words. (oh, he’s like gansey, like that. the raven cycle is still on my brain. i had so many scene sketches where ernest and frank were way too callous to each other bc they kept coming out like ronan and declan.) -kit’s line at the beginning is “someone in this very room has betrayed us” which is jacques’s line from the building committee meeting in unauto. the clock saying wrong afterwards is because the someone who really betrayed them (lemony) isn’t in the room.

-the costumes, which i did decide very arbitrarily: monty: clearly a snake. olaf: sigh. wolf ramona and olivia: oh, there was actually a slight distinction that just no one notices because none of them have looked at an insect (and also because describing clothes properly but succinctly is the hardest thing. i've written fic for a long time!!!!! i did my time in block paragraph clothing description hell!!! it haunts me!!!!!!!!!!), but ramona was the butterfly and olivia was actually a dragonfly. their masks are roses because, well 1) I thought that would be cool 2) butterflies and dragonflies land on flowers…. jacques: the boxwood, but a lion otherwise. josephine: ocean widdershins: the octopus with the pirate hat jacquelyn: the gold star suit (because gustav said she should do it for a play on. star. like. actress star.) miranda: uranus’s moon named miranda. it was very vague and I put that in the fic before I decided to have her in the little scene with esme. and then i thought i would put her in that scene too. gustav: phantom of the opera. haruki: tree frog hector: tree (not because of haruki’s costume but because i literally could not think of a damn thing for hector to be) lemony: uhhhhhh I had vague ideas he was. a cloud or something. like a stormcloud???? couldn’t pan out though. I like him in grey anyway. kit: I really just wanted her in red. with a big cape. and i spent so much time mentally deciding if i wanted her to have glasses or not in the archives that i forgot to mention her mask. everyone has one i swear to god white faced women: did anyone recognize that was them? :) it’s not mentioned in any way at all but in my head they were all dressed identically as flappers

esme actually doesn’t have one, because I, forgot, to give her one. I’m taking suggestions.

-references to lyeekha’s fics: -“that which is essential is invisible to the eye” is what frank says to jacques at the end of edge, and also the title of their snicket/denouement series -it initially wasn’t in there, because I was worried it wasn’t, like, in the right tone, re: what happens in edge vs how I was interpreting jacques and frank? but i liked it a lot. so i put it back in. -“frank quit smoking, but you didn’t” is a reference to frank smoking at the end of rigged -guess the guest and the clock alcove are from the end of fragments, with dewey and ernest watching hotel guests. this is my favorite thing in the whole world and something i actually keep forgetting is not canon because it is SUCH the perfect beethoven parallel -kit’s tattoo, which I was specifically imagining as the giant bombinating beast tattoo from ink on her back, which is definitely not around her neck but that was the only spot of skin she was showing so it was available and my thought was, it was kind of a low-cut in the back dress, and she was wearing the cape to cover up the giant tattoo on her back because beatrice was not there to cover it up with makeup (also bea picked out the dress.) (bea: if I can’t be there you have to make a statement) (kit: I have to what) -lemony being a “powerful, mythical figure” to the sugar bowl gen was actually something I wrote a long time ago, back in 2013, and I put it in the fic because I thought it fit, and then happened to reread double edged VERY late into the rewriting, literally THE DAY after I wrote that line in, and i saw a similar line of thought, and I was like “*cooper voice* sometimes you just get lucky ~ ” -jacques being in a lion costume, from the masquerade outfit sketches

additionally – -yes I am still cackling about ‘angel of my apple’ -angel of my apple -ANGEL OF MY APPLE -writing olaf is constantly like, he can say the funniest fucking things. and then turn around and say the absolute cruelest shit and the balance can be difficult. -but, angel of my a p p l e

-i can’t believe that out of all the people here, frank and jacques are the ones having the most semi-successful romantic relationship. well, ramona and olivia, too, but frank and jacques actually kiss so good for them -i know it was very vague and it’s because writing romance is physically embarrassing, but yes that last line was supposed to be them kissing, i’m so sorry

-undercover underwater was a last-minute addition because I didn’t want to take the time to try and google something real and good because I didn’t have the time. my guilty pleasure is super shitty hallmark murder mystery movies (I like good murder mysteries as well, thank you.) and my mom’s been reading terrible murder mysteries during lunch (where I was sitting across from her, also eating lunch, but also hiding behind my laptop and writing the fic) so I just came up with undercover underwater on the spot, but my mom came up with the tagline. it was originally ‘sleeps with the fishes’ (especially because i love the godfather movies which also, clearly has a very big stress on family vs The Family) but I thought ‘diving for the truth’ was funnier. -my mom and my brother (who has no interest in shitty murder mysteries, but loves to verbally smack them down with me re: their predictable tropes) and I decided that the plotline was something like, single woman scuba dives and keeps running into stuff (you know, hidden treasure, dead bodies, the like); her love interest drives the boat; her overbearing family member is an aunt; this is definitely like, book four in the series. there’s probably twelve books or something. (she goes on vacation on like book six and still finds a dead body, come on it practically writes itself.) (she probably owns a little fish tank......it’s a small sunny beach town.........etc etc.........) (it’s so easy to do this.) -oh, fixer upper is the worst hallmark murder mystery series, murder she baked is the best. in my opinion.

-dewey and lemony were supposed to have an actual conversation at the hors d’oeuvres table but every time I tried to put lemony in earlier he just wouldn’t work. it didn’t feel right. so he got saved for the reveal. -but i’m still delighted by the idea of lemony literally doing the shot of gazpacho. -dewey uses a spoon because he doesn’t have the composure or the guts to do a shot of cold soup -lemony was also supposed to have a scene with kit and one with jacques, i’m pretty sure, to lead up to the gazpacho conversation and the commiserating re: siblings. but again, didn’t work out. so then dewey had to fare alone in the scene. -oh!! the line about how lemony hides, in the least likely places, was actually something that was in my initial write of lemony’s scrapped pov of my ellington fic. jacques being responsible for sending olivia to the hinterlands was from a scrapped jacques fic. -steal from your unused fic.

-because I had to take scenes with lemony out, I had some, gaps in the night that I had to fill in (especially because this is a party more people are there than the snickets and the denouements), so that was how esme, the herpetology squad, and olaf and josephine came to be. (also olaf needed to show up again somewhere else otherwise he kind of, disappeared awkwardly, I thought?) -also because initially there was going to be a scene of bea and bertrand, elsewhere, but I wanted to keep the fic contained to the hotel, because one of the ideas I wasn’t able to put into the fic all that much was the sense of the hotel being its own world -oh, bea and bertrand don’t know that lemony used them as cover. the assignment they were working on instead of being at the party? planning the opera. the scene would’ve come right after ramona and olaf’s conversation. -the herpetology squad not only serves to highlight that people can’t tell the denouements apart (part of the foreshadowing that ernest would pretend to be frank), but was also me roasting myself because writing like a million different characters I had never written like this before had me very concerned about if their characterization was consistent, specifically for kit. (specifically, her with dewey.) also defining a character down to one base trait can be helpful when writing and creating characters, but for people no it’s not ideal. -haruki’s estimation of the denouement’s traits were not how i was mentally keeping track of them, because i definitely do do the ‘one base trait’ sometimes, but i had a lot more going on when i was thinking of them -but yes dewey is kind. in the way that bertrand is kind, but bertrand’s like, way more smooth about it.

-lemony does not have his own pov because, for me personally, I can’t fathom writing him in any other way besides first person, and it just would not do to have one scene out of the whole fic not in third person. unless he was secretly narrating each scene, which, he clearly was not. i would’ve had to do it in a whole different style.

-i love that dewey and kit are like ‘ahaha we’re the normal ones though’ and their normal conversation is them literally going ‘hey these creepy fish are AWESOME THOUGH’ -i looked at so many fish. for hours. -ALL BECAUSE I came up with the phrase ‘oceanic intrigue’ as a fun phrase and decided I had to commit my soul to it and never look back. -oh, the fairy shrimp are really very cute though. and i think the cookiecutter shark is, fucked up but a neat little guy.

-i’m eternally going to be laughing about this too kit: where the fuck is frank frank: /three floors down, making out with jacques

-oh!! 40-49 is unassigned in the dewey decimal system (which I googled. many, many times.), and was previously biographies. there’s another section for biographies now, but because biography was the closest I could come to like, some sort of, identity category, I thought it was more fitting if it was the section that used to be biography but was now as blank as frank felt.

-dewey is the one responsible for the clock sounding like it does. he just thinks ‘wrong’ is a fun word. that, and frank recognizing jacques by sound, were from my earlier scene sketches for this when i thought this fic was going to be much, much shorter.

#lulu talks about the sad lemon man

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isinkwiththeship · 4 years

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I’ve written Dasey at different ages. I’ve written them getting together in high school, college, and later in life. I’ve read a ton of fics, too, in all those different stages, and I have come to the conclusion that Derek and Casey would have had to wait until college, minimum, to get together. That’s not just because then they would be away from their friends and family with a little more room to breathe, but for a few other reasons.

1. If we look at their start from season 1. They are young, they are immature, and they are often obnoxious. As much as I love the show, some episodes I rewatch and I think that they are both overreacting. Which is fine. They’re teenagers, that’s sort of their job. Everything is Big and Dramatic when you’re in high school and it’s hard to see a bigger picture at work.

But.

That kind of attitude does not make for a healthy relationship. Casey’s on-again, off-again romance is a good example of this. A lot of Dasey shippers will point out that she was only with Sam to cover for her attraction to Derek. This might be true, but I also think she genuinely liked him. He was softer, kinder, and the kind of person that Casey thinks she wants at that point in her life (he’s ultimately too passive for her, which I can relate to, and Derek acts as his foil in that regard... or vice versa). Anyway, a lot of her arguments with Sam are over something so small, so little, but they seem like a big deal to Casey at the time.

I think she’d look back one day and feel embarrassed at some of the fits she threw during that relationship, but I may just be projecting.

At any rate, Derek and Casey are more dramatic, I think, at that age then a lot of teens as well. There are often moments where even Emily, Lizzie, and Edwin think they are overreacting about something. Their youth and their personalities contribute to this, and it’s just not a good time for a relationship that is going to last.

Derek, at the time, is more concerned with his reputation than settling down. We see him try for Kendra and Sally, but ultimately he would rather just make out with a cute girl and call it a day then have to answer to the demands and expectations that come with a relationship (I say demands which has, like, harsh and negative connotations, but I just mean being in a relationship requires more than thinking about yourself and he is, inherently, pretty selfish, even if he has many redeeming moments--more and more of them as the series goes on). The Derek we see in the last episode (”Yeah, same difference” ugh, my heart) is very different from the Derek we see in episode one. He’s grown. He’s been hurt. He’s hurt women. He’s grown closer with Casey. He has more and more moments where he does something genuinely honest and good without an ulterior motive. He is growing to the point where he could manage a relationship on top of his ego.

Their time together those first few years help to knock some of the sharper edges off of their personalities, softening them both into something resembling what could be a healthy personality into adulthood.

(then we get the movie which just regresses them a bunch, but whatever)

2. In high school, Derek and Casey both have unrealistic expectations about relationships and how they should work. Again, youth and inexperience contributes to this. Casey, especially, have these romanticized and idealistic expectations of relationships and how they should work. She wants everything to be done her way. Like Derek, she’s often selfish, just in a very different way. She also has weird expectations of the kind of person she wants to be with. At first, it seems like she wants someone a lot like her. She wants someone into poetry, etc. etc. The problem is, when you put two people who are too similar, you get no chemistry. There’s a whole lot of agreement, and I’m not suggesting that you ought to actively disagree with your partner to have a good relationship, but I think that there should be some differences. You don’t have to be interested in all of the same things, and you don’t have to do everything together. Spending time with people who have different interests than you is great, because then you get to learn and experience new things, and you have stuff to talk about other than agreeing on the same opinions at every turn.

There is some truth to opposites attract. I’m not a relationship expert or anything, this is just what I believe, but I think your core beliefs should be similar (again, not exact, just similar), and everything else can have variations of agreement and disagreement.

At her early stages in life, Casey has yet to realize that having someone like Derek around to challenge her, to make her chill out now and again, is good for her. If she were to be with someone as tightly wound as she is, it wouldn’t go well.

Derek, too, doesn’t understand how relationships work. When he does try for a relationship, he doesn’t handle the breakups all that well. He lets Kendra boss him around, and to get her attention in the first place, he tries to become something he’s not (even though that wasn’t what she was interested in). If you believe that to be with a person, you have to change who you are that extremely, then you don’t have a solid foundation on which to build a relationship.

3. Most people are not ready for a life-long commitment at 15, 16, and 17. Or even a few years after that. Derek and Casey have a lot of chemistry, they provide a balance to one another, and they are the reason that the other has bettered themselves over the years.

They have the potential to last.

That’s a terrifying thought when you’re still in high school, at least for most people. There are some expectations to this, and I know a handful of people who are happily married to their high school sweetheart, but that is not the norm. I think as much as Casey talks about love and whatever, that she’s just as afraid of commitment as Derek. There is a lot of self-sabotage in her relationships--but that’s a conversation for another day.

They aren’t ready for a commitment at that age. That age is such a weird, hard time. Not to mention that people change as they age and go through more experiences. Most people are not the same person at 25 that they were at 15.

People do not always change in the same way, either. You might be more prone to growing apart than growing together, depending on personalities. Granted, that likely wouldn’t be the case for them but they couldn’t know that at that age.

I think they need more life experience, in general, to be ready for the kind of relationship they have the potential for.

4. Dating is for Dumping. This is a kind of weird concept, but bear with me. I wound up going to this seminar type thing when I was in high school, called dating is for dumping. The basic premise was that its okay to date. As much as breakups suck, they’re okay, too. The idea behind dating is that you are looking for a potential partner in life, but you have to find that through trial and error. You figure out what you want in a partner, the kind of person you want to be with, through trial and error.

The first time you go on a date with someone who is rude to the waitstaff, and you sit there uncomfortable and with this vague idea that you don’t even want to be on a date with a person like this, let alone a second date, you’ve just decided that you don’t want to date a person who treats service works shitty.

If you are a church-going person, and you start dating a person who doesn’t go near church, then you might realize that you’re okay with that or you might realize that you would rather share that experience with someone.

Casey has a series of monogamous relationships, and it starts to paint a picture for her of the kind of person that she wants to date which, I think, is how she winds up with Truman. People have drawn parallels between him and Derek over and over again, and they aren’t wrong (though the two have very different fundamental beliefs). Derek has way fewer actual relationships.

Basically, the two need time to date people, to see what they want in a partner, to live life and grow up before they would ever be ready to put in the work for a relationship with one another.

This has turned into a very long, unexpected essay but these thoughts have been floating in my head a lot lately, and I decided to put them down for someone to possibly read one day. I dunno. I’ll still read fics that have them get together in high school, but at the moment I think MOST of my fics will center around them getting together in college or later.

#dasey #lwd #life with derek #writing #fanfiction #unexpected essay #words for the void #indeed #this went on longer than I thought it would #and that's that tumblr ate my first draft and I had to start all over #dating is for dumping #I will die on that hill #I also broke up with my boyfriend at the time not long after that seminar #couldnt be with someone who gave zero fucks about school and their future #also i was afraid of commitment

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illfoandillfie · 4 years

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5 Simple Rules for a Successful Fake Relationship: One Small Hitch

READ PART 1

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader

summery: You and Ben have your first official date and settle into your "relationship". But, with filming coming to a close, you'll need to be more committed to the act than before, especially when Ben's keeping secrets.

Warnings: Again, nothing much. Some language. Drinking. Nothing else I can think of.

Words: 8355

AN: Chapter 2 is finally here! Sorry for the delay but hopefully the next part will be up faster. I'm really really enjoying writing this series and I am so very excited about what's coming! The song mentioned is Reckless Serenade by Arctic Monkeys. Sidenote: Can anyone work out the theme of the chapter titles?

Taglist: @laedymoon @dtfrogertaylor @vee-ndetta @atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama @deakyclicks @jennyggggrrr @drowseoftaylor @hannafuckingsucks @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming @queenmylovely @supersonicfreddie

“I’ve got something for you,” you half shouted at Ben when you saw him walking towards you from across the field you were filming in. You shuffled your shitty takeaway coffee into your other hand so you could reach into your bag, pulling out a piece of paper folded in half. He took it and pulled you into a hug, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “Funny cause I have something for you too,” Ben said as he let you go, reaching into his backpack and handing you a magazine, “Oh, shit, it’s our rules. You want page 15 by the way.” “Figured you’d want a record of them. What exactly am I looking f-” you let the word hang as you found the right page. It was decorated with a photo of you and Ben kissing on his doorstep, his hand around your back, the shirt you’d borrowed riding up just enough that it was clear you didn’t have shorts on underneath as you clutched at him. There was some text beside it, mentions of your most notable roles and his, a brief description of the movie you were in the process of making, and some speculatory remarks with a couple of innuendos thrown in. The usual gossip mag fare. On the other side of the paragraph was another photo, both of you leaving set the previous Friday, hand in hand and smiling. “We look pretty good together,” you laughed, getting only a noncommittal grunt in return. He’d suddenly become very interested in the sheet you’d handed him, staring at it like he hadn’t been there when it was written. You reread the brief article, trying not to gawk at the photographs. It certainly looked believable. “I’ve had about four people wish us well this morning,” Ben suddenly said, seemingly pulling himself together, folding up the rules and shoving them into his back pocket, “and I’ve not been here long. It’s kinda weird having everyone know we’re together. Or think we’re together,” he quickly corrected himself. “Yeah, Mel kept asking me questions about it while she was doing my makeup this morning, so I hope she took my awkwardness as me wanting to keep things private and not me not knowing how to answer some of them.” Ben chuckled, “yeah, Gail gave me a bit of a grilling too. I just told her we’d been sort of seeing each other for a few weeks and had only just like made it official or whatever and she seemed to buy it.” “Good, I told Mel the same sort of thing. Hopefully that’s enough for them.” “I’m more concerned with what my friends are going to say. I don’t think any of them read Heat though so hopefully it doesn’t come up any time soon,” “Lucky. My friend Felicity has the dumb site bookmarked. Checks it religiously. Bloody miracle she hasn’t called yet.” “Better turn of your phone then,” “And come back to a full voicemail and about a hundred texts demanding to know why I’m ghosting her?” “Tell her you were filming. I do it all the time,” he was grinning at you and you couldn’t help but grin back as you pulled your phone out and shut it off, “atta girl,” he pulled you into his side and gave you an affectionate squeeze that you leaned into , fully aware of how many people were around you, potentially watching. It was a feeling that didn’t really let up. You knew, rationally, that everyone there was focused on their jobs, but you couldn’t help feeling like you were constantly being scrutinised, and not just for your acting. It didn’t help when Seth had to stop recording to fix a problem with the boom mic and, good-humouredly, said, “don’t worry lovebirds, we’ll have her running in a second.” Or that one of the ADs delivered your call sheets for the next day with a, “I always thought you’d be cute together.” And it certainly didn’t help when you turned your phone on at the end of the day to find a series of texts from Felicity each with more exclamation points and capital letters than the last, and a missed call from Mary. “Better call her back,” Ben said, following you towards the carpark. You rolled your eyes, already holding the phone up to your ear listening to it ring. “Y/N, I was just about to try you again,” “Sorry, Mary, I had my phone off while we were recording, what’s the matter?” “Are you free this weekend?” “Um yeah, I think so, why?” “We’d like for you and Ben to go on a date this weekend. Somewhere in London preferably but it’s up to you. You saw the article in Heat? It seems to be going well. The hits your names have got on google have increased and there have been a few tweets about it. Nothing huge, you’re not trending or anything but you’re still relatively unknown so we weren’t expecting that to happen, certainly not overnight. But we think if we get a date story out quickly it’ll really help get people interested.” You rubbed your temple as you tried to process everything she’d just said, “Okay, I’ll talk to him and we’ll organise something. I’ll text you the details once I have them.” “Okay, let me know as soon as you can though. And send Peter the info too.” “Will do. See ya Mary.” “Was that about me?” Ben asked, smiling as he leaned against your car. “You up for a date this weekend? Apparently the first story went well and they want a follow up ASAP.” “Sure, where are we going?” “I don’t know, somewhere around London would apparently be best, but we get to choose. Any thoughts?” He thought for a moment, “This isn’t our first date is it? Like, we’ve said we’ve been on others before, right?” “Yeah, why?” “Well normally for a first date I take girls out for dinner and then, depending on the girl and how the dinner went, either a quiet drink or like a romantic as fuck walk in the park or something.” “That’s pretty standard stuff, Ben,” “Yeah, but in the fiction of us as a couple, this isn’t our first date. This’d be, what?” “Fifth maybe?” “Fifth. So I’m still trying to impress you a bit, but it’s like, more relaxed. We’ve done the dinner date, we’ve done coffee and a movie, we’ve even done the Museum. Now we’re getting into the fun shit.” “Museums don’t count as fun shit?” you chuckled, not sure where his train of thought was taking you. “It’s a bit overdone is all.” “What do you have in mind then?” “There’s this place that runs art classes during the day, right? Life drawing or like painting for beginner's type stuff. But a couple of nights a week they run these art and wine nights. They’ll give you a canvas or a ceramic figure or something like that and some paints and you can have a few drinks and do something arty. I did it with some mates a while ago, had heaps of fun. Seemed like the sort of thing yo- a girl might like to do on a date.” “That definitely sound fun.” “Really? You’re into it?” “Yeah, for sure.” “Okay,” Ben pulled out his phone and began typing, “shall I book us in for the Saturday night ceramics session?” “Go ahead. What time was that, so I can let Mary and Peter know.” “Seven thirty. If we get a cab in a little earlier we can grab something to eat on our way.” “Cool, okay I’ll text them. Is it BYO?” “Yeah. They do sell some stuff but it’s a pretty small selection.” “Okay, well that’s something to look forward to. Anyway, I should be going since I have about a million texts to sort through, I’ll see you tomorrow.” “Wait, one thing,” Ben said before you could open your car door, “There’s a few people coming off set now so I’m going to kiss you, okay?” “Thanks for the heads up,” “No worries,” he stepped closer, his hand rising to cup your cheek as he kissed you softly. He took longer to break away than you’d expected, letting the kiss deepen instead, but you didn’t mind too much. It was a good kiss. And if it hadn’t been for Ben and the movie, you would have been severely lacking them recently. Which explained the vague feeling of disappointment that hit you when he did step back.

On your way home your phone beeped with another text from Felicity but you ignored it until you were inside and changed into the comfiest clothes you could find, flopping down on your bed to scroll through what she’d written. They varied from, “omg why didn’t you tell me about this Ben guy?” to “Y/N!!! Answer my texts!!!” all the way up to, “BITCH!!! CALL ME!!!!” She picked up on the first ring. “Where the fuck have you been all day?” “Some of us don’t have office jobs we hate,” you laughed, “I actually had to work, funnily enough, and because we were on location I had to keep my phone off while we recorded.” “Well I’ve been going crazy over here. Imagine my shock when I boot up my computer and open Heat and see your fucking arse being grabbed by your co-star.” “He was not grabbing my arse.” “Close enough. You didn’t tell me how fucking gorgeous he is.” “No, well, I don’t usually think about the people I work with like that, do I?” “Which is why I was so surprised to see you’ve shacked up with one of them.” “It’s not quite that serious.” “One night stands aren’t your usual thing. Definitely not with guys you work with anyway.” “I never said it was a one night stand, just that it wasn’t super serious!” “How many times then?” “We’ve been on like four dates.” “You fuckhead! You mean to tell me you’re actually dating this guy, who by the way looks like he could be a fucking underwear model, and you didn’t think to tell me? No so much as a I got dicked down by a total babe aren’t you jealous message?” “I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it if it wasn’t going to go anywhere.” “But still, I’m your best friend, I tell you about every shag I have.” “In graphic detail,” “Exactly.” “Look it’s just a bit weird still. Neither of us have really hooked up with a co-star before and we didn’t want to say anything until we worked out what was happening.” “I guess that makes sense,” you could tell she didn’t mean it, “But, now that it’s out you owe me. I want to hear all about it.” “There’s not much to tell. We became quite good friends during all the pre-production stuff when we were rehearsing and all that. Our director wanted to make sure we clicked and had the right chemistry and stuff, since it’s a romcom and our characters get engaged in the first scene, so we hung out a lot. And then just before filming started he asked me out. Took me to this nice Chinese restaurant. It was fun so we agreed to go out again and it’s sort of just kept going.” “Those photos, was that the first time you’d stayed over at his?” “Second. First time was a couple of weeks ago. The night that led to the photos was just a few drinks after work with some of the others and we ended up ducking out a bit early and wound up at his.” “And?” “And what?” You had a hard time not laughing when you heard her groan. Her eagerness to know every sordid detail made her easy to fuck with, and that made the whole business of being secretive a lot more fun. “And, how was he?” “I mean…y’know,” “Y/N, I swear to god,” “He was good, okay? Really good,” you remembered what Ben had told you to say, trying not to laugh too much while you repeated it, “like, three orgasms good.” “Shit, really?” “Uhuh. And then another in the morning.” Felicity replied with a long whistle, “shit, girl, hold onto that one then. That’s definitely worth any trouble working together could cause." “Believe me, I know. We’re going out again this weekend.” It was surprisingly easy to lie about dating Ben. Though, of course, you weren’t technically lying since you would be going on a date. “Shit man, date five. That’s serious shit. You better tell me everything, in graphic detail.”

When you told Ben about the conversation the next day, admitting you’d spent ages praising his sexual prowess, he laughed and then thanked you, pulling you into a tight bear hug. You thought it was a slight overreaction considering he’d been the one to tell you what to say but his happiness was infectious, and you found yourself smiling more than normal as you hung out between scenes. An attitude which could only help your performance, making people more ready to believe you were a couple. His easy laughter and bright smiles continued until the afternoon when you were telling him more about Felicity and what you’d talked about. “She thinks you’re a keeper and kept telling me not to let you go.” “Your friend knows what she’s talking about.” “Lucky for you I can’t let you go since it’s all written up in a contract,” Ben laughed but when you glanced at him his smile seemed to falter. “You okay?” “Brilliant. Just had a bit of a late night and it’s catching up on me. Think I might try to have a quick nap before we’re needed again.” “I was thinking of grabbing another coffee if you want one?” “Thanks Y/N but I think the nap will do me more good.” “Probably better people don’t see us heading off to a trailer together anyway or they’ll suspect we’re getting up to mischief.” “Very true. I’ll see you a bit later.” “Sleep well!” Ben turned to leave, his smile seeming more forced than earlier. You would have worried except he seemed to be back to normal when he was called for your next scene. And it continued on through the week, his happiness only getting more pronounced the closer it got to the weekend.

You couldn’t quite match his energy on Friday, anxiety over your date getting stronger the closer you got to it. Hanging out at his place had been easy, even if it did include leaving half dressed. All you’d had to do was kiss him which you’d done enough times during filming that it was no longer too odd. But a proper date was something else. It was going to be the first real test you faced, the first time you’d really have to sell yourselves to the public as more than co-stars and more than a hook-up. “Hey are you okay?” “Huh?” “Your jiggling your leg a lot which you only do when something’s worrying you, what is it?” “Oh,” you forced your leg to stop moving, “nothing,” “Is it about our date tonight?” “What if it’s bad? What if we don’t look like we’re actually together and Mary and Pete have to cancel the whole thing?” “I’d get a decent night sleep not thinking about us,” he muttered. “What?” “I’ve been worried about it too,” he said louder, “but I think we’ll be okay. It’s not like we’ll be starved for conversation and we’ll have the paint and the wine and we’ll be fine. Plus, weren’t you the one who said this would be easy?” “Yeah I was,” you said sheepishly, “but -” “No buts. It’ll be a piece of cake. We go and have a good time painting a couple of plates or bowls or whatever, and then hold hands while we head home. They’ll get whatever shots they get, and they’ll spin it so we look like a couple.” “Yeah, you’re right. Sorry,” “It’s okay,” he reached out to rub the back of your hand, smiling softly at you, “the nerves might actually help you look like you’re legit. And worst comes to worst we can always run lines. I’m honestly so much more nervous about shooting that scene tomorrow.” “The one where we’re playing matchmaker?” “Yes! Have you seen how many names are in there?” “Theres like six, Ben,” “Yeah but they’re all repeated, and I know I’m going to get the order wrong,” You giggled and shook your head, “You’re unbelievable,” “Oh whatever,” he pushed your shoulder almost making you overbalance, “Just cos you know the lines already.”

Ben’s efforts to calm you down worked and you got through the rest of the workday without a hitch. Though your stomach was once again tight with nerves in the hours before the date. You spent a solid half hour standing in front of your wardrobe, freshly washed hair slowly dripping down the back of the towel you had wrapped around you, trying to settle on what to wear. When you were finally dressed you checked and rechecked the contents of your purse, and, in a moment of panic, you grabbed the heavily highlighted and notated script pages with the matchmaker scene and shoved them in beside your lipstick and bank card. By the time Ben arrived in an Uber to pick you up, ushering you into the backseat with a kiss on the cheek and a complement about how lovely you looked, you felt like you were on the verge of throwing up. But, once again, Ben’s natural charm eased your mind. The way he talked to you and smiled constantly had your heart rate slowing and your stomach settling within minutes. Even the way he squeezed your hand when he helped you out of the car, and the way he laced his fingers with yours as he led you towards your destination were welcome comforts. “D’you wanna grab something to eat?” Ben asked, stopping on a corner and looking around, annoyed people passing by on both sides. “Uhh, s’pose so.” “Has anyone ever told you you’re indecisive?” “I swear I’m not normally.” “Oh? Do I make you nervous, snookum?” he asked, playfully. “No, you git,” you laughed back, though you found it hard to meet his eyes, “I just don’t know I’m that hungry.” “Well, keep in mind there’ll be wine drinking. Don’t want to do that on an empty stomach.” “Valid argument. What’s nearby?” After some wandering you ended up in a McDonalds, Ben wolfing down a burger while you picked at the fries, not quite certain you’d be able to keep your food down. It was when you were coming out of a bottle shop, Ben holding the wine you’d agreed on, that you spotted the photographer. It was the same one who’d been outside Ben’s house when you stayed over, camera aimed at the two of you. Quietly you nudged Ben. He just wrapped an arm around you, pulling you into his side as you walked. You struggled to not watch the photographer as he followed you towards the art studio, having to keep reminding yourself to pretend he wasn’t there. “Relax,” Ben said softly in your ear, “He’s not important.” You nodded, afraid if you said anything you’d lose the meagre dinner you’d had. Ben’s thumb rubbing over your own gave you something else to focus on, counting each soft, smooth stroke, until you reached the right place.

You weren’t the only couple there, far from it. Most of the claimed tables were taken by pairs sitting close together, hands clasped or laying on thighs as they talked. A few tables held larger groups, double dates maybe or perhaps just friends. You felt a few eyes on you as you found a table close to the clear glass of the shopfront, but they turned away again quickly, more interested in their own little bubbles than yours. You glanced outside to check if the photographer was still there but couldn’t see much more than the reflection of you and Ben. His knee bumped yours under the table as he leaned toward you, pressing a finger to your jaw to turn your head towards him. “Forget the photographer. Forget Mary and Peter. Forget our arrangement. We're just two friends having a fun night out, okay?” “Okay,” “Okay. So what are you thinking of painting then?” He unscrewed the bottle of wine and grabbed one of the glasses you’d been handed on arrival. “Well what are my options?” “Well there’s your classic teacup, mug or plate options. There’s a couple of different jewellery boxes, I think. And then there are the statues, ummm, fairy, dragon, alien. Maybe a princess one, I can’t remember.” “More than I thought there’d be. What were you thinking?” “I did a dragon last time I was here. But I think I’m going to do a mug this time. Need some extras if you’re gonna be staying over more often.” “Maybe we should both do mugs, then? Something we can use at each other’s places.” “Alright, deal. But we can’t look at what the other is painting until they’re done.” “That’s going to be so hard!” you laughed, feeling properly relaxed for the first time all night. “Yeah but it’ll be fun though. Wait here, I’ll go grab us the mugs.” You took the opportunity to look around the room, trying to think of what Ben might like on a mug. There was art everywhere – paintings hanging on walls, examples of what the classes could teach you, decorated ceramics lining windowsills and shelves. Judging by the wildly differing levels of talent displayed, you assumed at least some of them were left behind and never claimed. There were plates decorated with fruit trees and ocean scenes, jugs covered in splatters of different colours, aliens in shimmery blue and princesses with green hair and orange dresses. But nothing that sparked your imagination. The noise of the room was steadily growing as everyone got stuck into their creations. Ben sat down, took a drink and got to work mixing colours. “You know what you’re going to do then?” “I have an idea. But I will warn you I’m not a particularly good artist so it might not look anything like what it’s meant to.” You picked up your blank mug and put it down again, tapping the end of a paintbrush against the table as you tried to come up with an idea. What did Ben like? He liked coffee. And dogs. And his guitar. More than once he’d brought it to set, playing it in his downtime. He’d been embarrassed the first time you mentioned overhearing him as you passed by his trailer, but you’d assured him you’d liked listening to him. You’d had the song stuck in your head for a week afterwards. “Made up your mind, have you?” Ben asked, glancing up from his handiwork as you mixed a pale peach colour. “No peeking,” “I wasn’t peeking. If I’d been peeking, I would have done this,” Ben craned his neck, leaning over to where your mug was. You laughed and pulled the mug closer to you, pushing him away with your other hand. He caught it in his own, taking the paintbrush from you, “Oi, careful with that.” “Oops, sorry,” Ben laughed and kissed your palm before letting you have your hand back, “No harm done. But y’know if you splattered me I’d have no choice but to get payback.” There was no need to reach for the script you’d brought as you and Ben fell into conversation while you painted. He asked if you’d had any more awkward phone calls with your friends and told you about what had happened when his mates had found out. Nothing like the conversation you’d endured, though there’d been plenty of teasing. You had to admonish him for nearly getting paint on your work when he began using the largest brush he had to artistically spray drops of paint over his mug. And then he’d laughed when you paused, admitting out loud that you weren’t actually sure how to paint the thing you’d planned on painting. He’d promised not to peek while you whipped out your phone to look up a reference image, going to far as to cover his eyes just to make sure. Once you gave him the okay he went back to painting, switching to a thinner brush and shushing you so he could concentrate. It was ridiculous how cute he looked, tongue between his teeth, bent over the mug as he slowly outlined the design. You shook your head to clear the thought and went back to your own work.

“Okay, I’m done. You wanna see now?” “Yes, absolutely. Unless you think we should wait until after they’ve been glazed?” “Fuck that, we can’t pick them up for a couple of days, I wanna show you now.” “Alright, show me then,” you put down your brush, focusing all your attention onto the mug in Ben’s hands. The base coat was a light purple, with splatters of darker purple over top. Slowly he turned the mug to show you the design on the front. It bore a slightly wonky engagement ring, similar to the one his character gave yours in the movie. On either side of the ring, in thin, not quite straight lettering, was the words we’re really good at this dating thing. You smiled as soon as you read the quote from the script, “I love it, Ben” “Thought it was kind of fitting,” he chuckled, “plus it’ll be a nice little souvenir once the movie wraps.” “That was a fun scene to shoot. Best proposal I’ve ever had.” Ben smiled and carefully turned his mug back towards him, “Best proposal I’ve ever given,” He seemed to be about to say something but stopped himself, shaking his head. You lowered your voice, “Promise I’ll get to keep it after we break up?” “Promise,” Ben said, matching your level and leaning in close, “Until then maybe you can use it as a reminder whenever you feel anxious about this whole dating thing.” “Thanks, I will.” You were suddenly very aware of how softly you were speaking, how close you were sitting, leaning in to hear each other over the rest of the room, and for a split second you thought he was going to kiss you again. But then the moment passed, the noise of the room intruding as Ben leaned back in his seat, “So do I get to see mine?” “Uh, it’s not quite done,” you said, picking up your brush again, the moment gone, “give me another couple of minutes.” “Masterpieces take time, I get it,” “This is by no stretch a masterpiece,” “I’ll be the judge of that thanks very much,” Ben turned to look out over the room while you tried to finish your painting without smudging anything, occasionally making comments about other people there or the art that decorated the room. You took one last look at what you’d painted, the guitar with the words stun gun lullaby written in cursive beside it, “Alright, I’m done now, you can look. Careful, some of it’s still wet.” Ben gently took hold of the handle and turned the mug so the design faced him. He broke out into a grin and you felt relieved that he liked it. “It’s definitely a masterpiece. For someone who didn’t know how to draw a guitar you’ve done an incredible job. And how did you know that’s one of my favourite songs?” “Is it? It's just the song I overheard you playing that one time. I thought that line was a good one for a mug. Nice and short so I didn’t have to paint too much.” “This is definitely my new favourite mug.” “Oh stop it.” “And hey, they kind of match.” You laughed when he pointed out the similarities, “Guess they do. Y’know that’d make a pretty cute Instagram post.” “You going to tag me as my mug?” “Of course. You could post a photo and tag me in it too,” “I don’t know. I don’t really post much personal stuff online.” “Well at least comment on mine,” “I can do that.”

After you’d taken a decent photo and posted it online you cleaned up, handed your mugs over to the woman running the night’s activity and stepped back out into the night. There was no sign of the photographer anywhere and you supposed he’d got what he needed and then left. Still, Ben grabbed your hand as you walked back up the street, just in case you’d missed the photographer in the crowd. “Guess that means we don’t have to worry about going home together,” you said, nudging Ben. “Guess not,” his lips quirked down in a soft frown.” “What is it?” “Nothing, nothing, just...feels kind of weird to just end the date here, I guess,” he scratched the back of his head and laughed, “Normally I’d offer to give you a lift home. Or at least give you a good night kiss, but I guess that’s not really needed now.” “Well, it’s like you said, we’re just friends having a fun night out. We could share a ride home though, if you wanted. You live near enough to mine it wouldn’t matter.” “Nah, don’t worry about it. I actually might go grab something to eat, don’t think that burger was quite enough. See you on Monday?” “Oh, yeah, okay, see you Monday.” There was a pause, both of you hesitating and then Ben gave you a much too quick hug before he walked off, disappearing into the crowd. You sighed and hailed a passing cab, spending the whole ride home wondering what the hell had just happened. But you pushed it from your mind once you were home, going through your usual nightly routine and very deliberately thinking of anything other than Ben. It didn’t help much. You still dreamt about him. Dreamt about the goodnight kiss you’d missed out on.

When you woke you had to laugh at yourself. You were sure that, had you binged a few episodes of a tv show or read something before you’d gone to bed you would have dreamt about it instead. Brains were suggestable like that. When you felt awake enough you rolled over and grabbed your phone finding a text from Ben and one from Felicity and an email from Mary. You opened Mary’s first, skimming over it and vowing to look at it properly once you had a coffee in your system. Ben’s was much easier to understand, a short message to say he had fun last night and that he’d pick the mugs up on his way to work on Monday. Felicity’s was just a series of question marks. You sent back a short response saying the date had been a lot of fun. It wasn’t enough and she was bound to come back at you asking for more details, but it would have to satisfy her. Slowly you got out of bed and made yourself a coffee, setting your laptop up next to you at the kitchen counter so you could try to read Mary’s email again. There was some information about some scripts she was going to send you, a couple of potential future roles, but the majority of the email was about you and Ben. She’d already seen the photos, apparently, and some of them would be run in the coming week’s magazine while others were being put online. She’d also seen the Instagram post and commended you for thinking of it. Another date would have to be organised, but it was better to wait until the next weekend or even the one after, so as not to fatigue the public.

So you and Ben fell into the routine of it. An email from one or other of your agents sometimes as vague as just telling you to organise a date, sometimes much more specific in what they wanted you to be doing, then the date itself, and in between work where you played up the romance as much as possible. You got good at pretending to stay over at each other's places, often just hanging out watching TV or running lines until the photographer called it a night and you were free to leave. Once or twice you’d opted to sleep in your own bed but get up early and head over to Ben’s for the required morning after shots but that process got old very quickly so you ended up actually staying over more and more. There was one day when your period came unexpectedly while you were at Ben’s. You were halfway through asking him to take you home when he offered to run to the store for you instead. “No, no, you don’t have to go out of your way like that, I’ve got plenty at home I just didn’t think I’d need any today.” “Y/N, I promise, it’s no trouble. I feel bad I don’t have anything here for you already. Been a while since I’ve lived with a girl and it didn’t even cross my mind. Seriously, it’ll take me two minutes.” When you still weren’t convinced he continued, “Plus, if I go we won’t ruin Peter and Mary’s plan for today. And the Paps can get a shot of me staring at boxes of tampons like a good caring boyfriend. It’ll help our image.” “Oh alright, as long as you don’t mind.” He was out the door a second later and back within ten minutes, though you did get a call from him at the shop, asking what brand you preferred. Once he was home, he made you a cup of tea, gave you a painkiller and, after checking you didn’t mind, cuddled up with you on the couch, teasingly calling you his cuddle bunny as he pulled you back against his chest. You almost complained, almost cited Rule 5, but it wasn’t so bad. Some might even go so far as to call it cute. It was better than snookum at any rate.

The dates themselves got easier after the first. You knew what to expect now so it wasn’t as nerve wracking as before. And Ben was always fun to be around, your list of inside jokes steadily growing as he became the one person you spent the most time with. You let yourselves relax a bit. On your third date Ben’s arm stayed glued around your waist as you walked around the zoo, only losing contact when a lemur jumped on his shoulder and you stepped back to take a photo. It wasn’t low enough to violate the rules you’d put in place but his hand was dangerously close to falling below your belt, and it was definitely something you would have put a stop to when you first started the charade. The Instagram posts had got more frequent too, though Ben still refused to post anything to his own profile. But he commented on everything you posted whether it involved him or not. And people were buying it. You’d been moved from page 15 to page 13 and then to page 10 in the magazines. You both picked up more followers online as your photos were shared across Twitter and Facebook and Tumblr. There were some downsides like rude comments and nasty messages but mostly they were easy to ignore. Worse were the phone calls and messages from family members and friends asking when they’d get to meet Ben. He’d had to fend off his own family as well, but you both stuck to Rule 4, making up excuses and promising it would happen eventually, but it just wasn’t possible right now. But your biggest problem was the issue of intimacy. It wasn’t the lack of sex itself, that was easily managed. It was that Ben had started to intrude on your fantasies. You’d be there with your fingers or your toys and suddenly it was Ben’s voice you were thinking of, Ben’s hands, Ben’s teeth and tongue and chest. Ben’s name falling from your lips. And you knew it was just because you were pretending to date him, on and off set. It was the dumb suggestable brain thing again. The thoughts were only there because you were pretending to be in love with him and usually sex was tied up with love or at least relationships. And really, you hadn’t been attracted to anyone much lately because you hadn’t been looking because you’d been pretending to be attracted to Ben so it’s really no wonder you’re brain got all confused and mixed him into those other thoughts. The first time you saw him after it first happened you wondered if he could tell, a slightly flustered awkwardness hanging over you. But it wasn’t worth mentioning to anyone. You just vowed to push him out of your mind as much as you could.

Nearly two months later you found yourselves back in the office where the idea of pretending to date was first floated. With filming drawing to a close Mary and Peter were keen to check in with you. The first thing either of them said when you and Ben turned up is how well the story was going. “Projections have the sales for this movie increased by five percent, just because of your relationship and that number is expected to grow as we get closer to release,” Mary spoke fast though whether that was excitement at the boosted numbers or just a busy schedule rushing her along you weren’t sure. “What happens now?” Ben asked, “I mean, since we won’t be filming together anymore after this week,” “That’s exactly why we wanted to talk with you both today,” Peter opened a pocket notebook and thumbed through a couple of pages, “so not much will change but we may occasionally need to balance out the loss of on set photos with shots of you out and about together. Nothing stressful and all very easily staged. You probably wouldn’t even need to be out for more than an hour or so at a time. People have been loving the domestic sort of photos you’ve been putting online, Y/N, that one of you using the coffee mugs you painted was especially good. So we’d like a few more of those sorts of moments. The two of you grocery shopping or walking a dog, do either of you have a dog? No? Hmmm, we could hire a dog and write a story about you sitting for a friend. We’ll put a pin in that for now. But yes, just some candid shots of you walking around London and doing regular everyday things together.” “We’ll also need to schedule the argument soon. We’re thinking somewhere within the first two weeks of filming being over. It means we can run speculation about whether the relationship is on the rocks now that you aren’t working together anymore. We’ll see how things go this week and make some decisions later, but we’ll give you plenty of warning before you have to perform it. Obviously, it has to be scheduled so we can guarantee someone will get photos but we need it to seem as natual as possible so we’ll leave the specifics of the argument up to you.” You nodded along but Ben had more questions. “What does this mean for any jobs we might be looking at taking after this movie wraps?” “You can still take on whatever roles you want provided they’re filming here. It’s harder to keep you in the public eye if you’re separated and while the drama of a long-distance relationship might be interesting at first, it’s not sustainable.” “If it was filming somewhere else in the UK we could maybe organise something. We’d have to look into it and see if it was possible to stick to our same plan but just shift the location. Maybe have a weekend visit angle to it, Y/N flies out to see Ben, Ben comes home to see Y/N, that kind of thing.” “Leave it with us Ben and we’ll get back to you on the logistics of it all.” “Oh, that’s okay, I don’t have anything set in stone, I was just curious.” “Is there anything else you have questions about?” “No, I don’t think so,” He looked towards you. “No, I’m all good.” “Okay, well, if you think of anything you can message us any time.” “Really, though, this is going very well. It’s already paying off but we need to keep the momentum during the post-production phase, so we need you both to be committed to this.” “We are.” “Unbelievably committed,” Ben added.

You and Ben left the meeting joking about potential arguments you could have and for the rest of the day, whenever you passed each other in the halls or had a moment alone you’d try to one up each other's suggestions. It was a good way to keep your spirits up even though the end of filming was fast approaching. One by one each cast member recorded their last scenes, saying an emotional thank you to the crew when the director called cut. You and Ben were the last to finish since you were the leads. A small pillow talk scene that you could do in your sleep. It was a nice way to end it, lying in bed with Ben’s arms around you, even with the heat of the studio lights. While you were waiting for the cameras to be positioned you and Ben joked around with the crew that were flitting around angling mics and adjusting set decorations. “Hey, Seth,” Ben said suddenly, “can you pass me my phone. I think we need to document this moment. What d’you say, cuddle bunny?” You laughed and poked him in the side but agreed. Ben stuck his arm straight up into the air, trying to angle the camera just right but he couldn’t quite get the photo to take without blurring. Seth took pity on you and offered to take the photo himself, allowing you and Ben to snuggle in close. “If you post it on Insta you better credit me,” Set laughed, turning it round to show you. “I’ll do that,” He said with a smile, “It’s pretty cute, I think I have to post it.” “Really?” you asked, surprised he’d volunteer to do such a thing. Ben didn’t have a chance to respond because everything was ready to go. Seth put the phone back away so you could film the scene, laughing in between takes until everyone was satisfied. “That’s a wrap on Ben Hardy and Y/N Y/L/N everybody,” A round of applause started as you pushed yourself to sit up, trying to stop yourself from welling up. “And that’s a wrap on The Perfect Match.” The applause continued and Ben pulled you into a tight hug, rubbing your back and pressing a kiss to the top of your head. You had to say a few words but you managed to get through it, and Ben’s little speech, without completely losing it. Afterwards, as people packed up the equipment and you headed back to your trailers to change, Ben pulled out his phone again. “I guess I should post that photo now, how’s this caption,” he said each word slowly as he typed it out, “Thank you Y/N for being the perfect Edith to my Andy. And thank you @theperfectmatchmovie for finding me my perfect match.” “Did you tag me?” “Of course,” “Did you tag Seth?” “Uhhhh, camera emoji by @seththesoundman. Now I have,” “Then it’s perfect. Little bit cheesy but I’ll let it slide.” “I’ll post another lot of photos with everyone else later and write a longer thing about how much fun this movie was and all of that, but I think this’ll do for the minute. Mary and Peter better fucking appreciate it.”

That evening most of the cast and crew headed out for drinks at the local pub. The official party would come later but everyone needed to get out and celebrate for an evening. You and Ben stayed for a few hours, Ben getting a little more clingy with each drink he finished. You limited yourself to only a couple. Ben wasn’t going to be able to drive so you decided to fall on that sword, switching to water quite early on. When he reached the point of intoxication that had him constantly complementing everyone you decided to call it a night, taking a final lap to say goodnight to everyone. There were a few wolf whistles and slurred comments about getting some as you left, Ben’s arm around your waist and his laugh in your ear, but you waved them off and led Ben out to your car. “C’mon Benny boy, I’ll drop you home.” “What about my car?” “Well you’ll have to come get it in the morning, won’t you.” He hummed and lay his head against the back of the seat, chatting animatedly as you made the trip to his. You wished him goodnight as he got out of the car and watched him make his way up to his front door. There he paused, patting his pockets. “Everything alright? You called out to him. “I don’t have any keys,” he laughed, turning around to come back to the car. “You fucking goon, did you leave them at the pub?” “Guess so,” he shrugged, “Can I crash at yours?” “Get in,” “Thanks cuddle bunny, you’re the best” You rolled your eyes, “Guess this means I’ll be your taxi tomorrow, running you around to find your keys and your car,” “That’s what girlfriends are for,” “If you say so.”

Once at yours you headed to the kitchen to make tea, Ben following to grab a glass of water and a snack. He knew where you kept everything by now, making himself a sandwich with whatever he found in your fridge, and then carrying it out to the couch. By the time the teas were made Ben already had Netflix queued up, ready to play the next episode of the series you’d started watching together. Nearly Twenty minutes into the episode Ben’s phone dinged. “Ah shit,” he said as he glanced at it, “forgot I said I’d call Joe. Do you mind if we pause the ep? We’re trying to organise travel stuff for him and it’s easier if we talk it through rather than texting it all.” “Sure,” “I promise I won’t be long.” “Take your time, it’s fine,” you were already reaching for your laptop. Ben smiled at you before ducking out of the room. You head him walking down the hall, footsteps fading as he got further away. For a while you just enjoyed the quiet as you checked your emails and social media profiles but after commenting on the photo Ben had posted and replying to a few messages from people you knew there wasn’t really much left to do. You drummed your fingers on your keyboard trying to think of another website you could visit. There was still no sign of Ben and you didn’t want to continue the show without him so you stood up, stretched, and headed back to the kitchen to grab some chocolate from the stash you kept. You were just about to shut the fridge when you heard Ben’s voice coming from the other side of the wall. Your spare room where he’d clearly gone to make his phone call. “Yeah, Joe, I fucking know. But I don’t have much choice.” He sounded more sober than he had when he’d got up. There was a pause as Joe spoke and then you heard Ben again. “I don’t know what I was thinking getting into this mess…..Yeah maybe. Doesn’t really matter though now does it…. What’s that supposed to mean? I can’t just call it quits now, the story is doing too well and Peter has assured me that the numbers are promising or whatever I don’t really know how they measure it. All I know is that people are going to see the movie because of us.” There was a long pause. You quietly shut the fridge and took a step back towards the doorway. This was not a conversation you should be listening in to. But then Ben spoke again, and curiosity got the better of you. “It doesn’t matter Joe. It doesn’t matter how I feel.” He laughed but it was completely devoid of humour, “Of course it sucks. It’s fucking shit, man. I just keep waiting for her to tell me she feels the same but it’s not happening…... No, I know it’s completely one sided…..No, I don’t think she knows. She wouldn’t have wanted to do it in the first place if she knew…. I just wish things were different. I love being around her and being able to hold her and kiss her but it fucking sucks that it’s only in public….. I don’t know. Maybe not filming together will ma-” You could feel your cheeks burning as you tiptoed back towards the lounge room, not quite sure what to do with yourself. You paced back and forth for a moment before deciding to go to the bathroom, at least then Ben couldn’t walk in on you as you tried to process it. You let the door shut loudly behind you, hoping that if Ben had heard movement he’d think you’d just got up to use the loo. He couldn’t know you’d overheard him. You leaned against the sink and tried to make sense of what you’d heard. Ben couldn’t have a crush on you, he just couldn’t. But it was the only thing he could have been talking about. What the fuck did that mean for your arrangement? What the fuck were you meant to do now?

#my writing #my fics #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy imagine #ahhhhhhh #ya'll im so excited about this series #i have all the chapters planned out #i have all the titles planned out #i wrote a short synopsis of the film they're making #so that i can reference it throughout the fic and be consistent in what the scenes might be #god can ben please just make a romcom now #i want it more than anything in the world

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bunnylouisegrimes · 4 years

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Episode 9 Review (The Future: What Does It Hold?)

Tagging @coldsoba per request

This episode was a headache for me. I was anticipating it, and although it wasn’t entirely bad and it wasn’t the worst, I think this episode highlights all the bad aspects of this season and brings them together. It brings some of the good that this season brought out together as well, but it’s evident to me now that we’re reaching the end so far that the bad is outweighing the good. This episode has me worried about the future of the series, and angry overall. I’m concerned that if this series does continue and has a season 3, it won’t be good, and it will turn into a shit show like The Walking Dead did (they want a season 3, although, based on the low ratings and low viewership, AMC might cancel, no one truly knows yet, especially if BBC and all that other stuff helps boost it).

Before I start this review, I’d like to say right here and now: this is a pretty critical analysis, and possibly has a bunch of unpopular opinions, but I’m saying it anyways. I’m mad, I’m annoyed, and I’m ticked. Last week’s episode ticked me off, this... Oh, man... just know I’m cool if you disagree with me, but I’m hoping by the end you all understand why I feel this way.

Now, don’t get me wrong: like most episodes of this show from this season, despite entire scenes and plot points being bad, it has great moments to enjoy. Did this episode contain lots of action and intensity? Hell yes, and I liked that. Did it stay true to the book ending so far? In a few ways, yes. Pretty much all the ways it didn’t due to the changes they made that were already questionable were the things I didn’t like, which leads me to this: Do I like the direction the story is going, based on what we know and have so far? Hell no. Of course, we don’t know 100% the direction it’s going until next week’s episode, but right now, I’m very on the fence.

Because there is a lot of bad I’m going to discuss, let’s get the good out of the way.

Lou and Vic in the beginning, as per usual, are sweet and I love them. Tabitha and Lou’s interaction was sweet as well. Seeing Charlie frightened and shook was oddly cute, but also funny. And Wayne and Charlie’s interaction... I’m sorry, it was just adorable. I like the idea of Maggie and Vic going to Christmasland together, that was a good choice (although now... I’m uncertain).

To begin the negativity, we’ll start with Charlie and the house scene. I like Charlie confronting his own fears, it’s a very interesting concept. I find it kinda stupid and confusing Charlie wouldn’t know this house exists in his own mind, I mean, it is a part of his own mind, even if it was in the back of it. Why would he not know? Despite that, we’re gonna move onto the meat and potatoes. Now, Cassie’s POV, based on how she was presented in the show (which I still hate, btw, and I am greatly annoyed with how she is not the abuser she was in the book, but I’ve discussed this already a million times), makes sense. We get why she’s pissed, she should be, although I don’t think she understands that her ex-husband had all of this shit happen to him as far as creating Christmasland and becoming a vampire and all that by having a mental snap. It all happened due to his mental pressure. He didn’t have full control (if any control!) over that entire situation. It happened, his life depended on souls and energy from that moment on, and he had to make do with the shitty end of the stick being presented to him. Christmasland is both good and bad, and vampirism is both good and bad, and Charlie has to try to make do with what he can to give himself and his daughter happiness, and focus on the positives. Cassie could’ve maybe given him at least that credit, but she makes it out like, “You’ve brought her happiness in presents and candy, not making her a woman.” Uh... Cassie? Charlie and Millie became vampires out of his control. All this shit happened, how the hell could he reverse all of it? Is there anyway he could? It’s not even explained if he can, but the writers ignore this fact and make it out to be like, “Look, he’s so evil!” Writers, is there anyway he could change these things, even if he wanted to? “Well, no, not exactly, but look, he’s still evil!” So... you’re not even allowing him to have an opportunity to change, and then when he’s stuck in the situation and making the best out of it, even if it isn’t 100% the best way... he’s still super heinous and evil? “Yes!” Okay... whatever... see this is another reason why it annoys me how they’re writing Charlie as “the worst person in the world,” when really, he isn’t. He’s not an angel, but he is not as evil as this show wants to present. Pretty much all of Cassie’s criticisms are valid, but she could’ve at least given Charlie some credit. Nope! But the thing that really bothered me in the back of my mind was how much better this scene would’ve been had they actually written his backstory properly. I kept thinking how much better it would’ve been if an abusive Cassie comes back to haunt Charlie and taunt him, degrading him, and mocking him, how much more sense it would’ve made. And if Millie pointed these things out to him, it might’ve changed his mind some (he would think, “oh, even my daughter kinda agrees with the abuser”). It works here with the way they portrayed her, despite the point I mentioned about Charlie making the best of shit falling flat on Cassie’s end, but it would’ve been 1000% better if they made her an abuser and she scared Charlie, then Millie brings up similar points and Charlie’s POV starts to change a bit.

(Plus, I’d like to add that by doing that, you’re setting potential up for a Charlie redemption arch, and he wouldn’t have to die, Vic and Maggie wouldn’t have to die, and season 3 has interesting potential, and you still have your main characters that we enjoy).

On the topic of this scene, here is a take a friend of mine gathered from it that I definitely can see as well: The point they were trying to make in this scene is that Charlie is a coward. This is their interpretation of Cassie being ‘abusive,’ they didn't leave it out (her being angry at him) like we thought they would. They wanted to give her a concrete reason to hate him so much and call him out for his bad deeds. Also, this house, which was hidden away at the back of his mind, is a mesh of Charlie's fears and his guilt. Based on his facial expressions and his mannerisms, and how he forcefully held Millie, this was all out of fear and guilt for what he did to them that first time and how The Wraith pretty much consumes you. She's literally trying to tell his stupid ass that they can never leave, otherwise, they'll turn to static, which they will. Millie can't go anywhere because she's stuck there and Charlie knows because he was selfish, he robbed her of her future without intending to. Charlie is highkey a yandere, even for his own kid, but it makes sense because he's never really had anything, Also, as to why he’s sort of controlling in a sense: he's driven by fear and also anger if you think about it. Christmasland is how he projects and saving other children because he had a rough and traumatic childhood, he has some serious mental health issues. This I see 100% presented here too, which is a good aspect coming out of this scene. This season does show us a really vulnerable Charlie as they explore his past and give him a breaking point, which we like! But we both definitely agreed that they wanted to make Charlie more of a dick than needed throughout this whole season. Maybe these writers really wanted more drama, especially Manx family drama, through Charlie acting worse? Not so sure. Either way, it gets on my nerves, and it’s almost inconsistent with the narrative they want to spin. They keep going back and forth with “Charlie’s so sad” (which, I would agree, he is, but they even mess that up and somehow still make him look worse) and “Omg he is the worst person ever.” I hope I’ve explained myself well enough in this area, it’s a very complicated and convoluted topic that has me conflicted and annoyed myself.

I think most importantly, the thing that annoys me about all of this Manx family drama the most is: How tf are they gonna “live normal lives” and “escape?” Millie grabbing onto the ornament prevents her from disappearing, which really doesn’t make sense. I’m sure they’ll clarify it next episode, but how is she gonna become a woman and live a normal life? For Christ’s sake, Charlie can barely understand the modern world as an adult man! You think a kid like her is gonna truly enjoy it or understand it? I have my doubts on this and how they’ll write all of that. Plus, she’s a vampire! If she returns human and all the other kids do when their ornaments break, and this is something that confuses me even in the book... where will they go? Oh yeah, they’ll somehow find normal lives! Honestly, it would make more sense to have them move onto the afterlife. Are they gonna keep them human and alive to make them the stars of the show? That possible concept of, “Oh, the kids are gonna be the stars of the show now!” No, writers... just no. Nobody is gonna care about that. Again, it’s a possibility, and it’s a possibility I’m not thrilled by personally. I don’t want them to be the stars. They can be awesome supporting characters, but not the main focus. Idk man, I’m just saying right now, I’m not so sure how this whole concept is gonna work and I fear how they’re going to write it.

Next up: Wayne’s shitty behavior. Wayne is acting like a really big asshole, and it’s getting on my nerves. “He’s now a vampire!” I hear someone say. “Of course he’s acting this way!” Yes, but the reason why it’s especially annoying is because Vic keeps trying and trying to get the point across to him, and it’s all for nothing. We know Vic’s opinions and her heartfelt feelings for her son, and she ends up having to repeat herself when she might as well be taking to the wall. What’s the point? Filler? We already know Vic’s determination is strong. In the book, how Wayne was acting was better. He held onto himself, but he also didn’t, but Vic’s words managed to get across to him quite a few times throughout his journey. This would’ve been much better on screen, but the writer’s were like, “HA HA NOPE!” The scene that really angered me: what was the point of Vic making her speech (which was really nice btw) only for Wayne to not listen... you’d think that’d be the scene where he changes, but the writers decided to turn it into a shock value filler moment (similar to Chris’s death, which, btw, all this nonsense is making his death for near nothing). And, let’s not forget my question from last week.. where is Craig in all of this? Hmmm... guess he decided to take a vacation from helping his biological son, because he’s just gone! Why?! What was the point?! He better at least appear next week, but even then... too late now, buster! Probably should’ve been here earlier! I mean, for real, what was the point of Craig’s character at this point? What a waste of potential...

The worst part imo from this entire episode: Okay, so the writers make Charlie an even worse villain, even giving him those subtle sadistic undertones even as Vic is trying to talk to Wayne (alright, I get it, there’s that element to “saving” Wayne that’s vengeful when it comes to Charlie, but it’s honestly just too much darkness; it’s almost out of character, especially when it’s in a scene like this. I get it, he likes the idea of getting revenge on Vic, but does he have to be THIS dark? That laugh he gave was funny, yes, and I couldn’t help myself but laugh just because of how stupid it sounded, but looking at the reason why he laughed... if anything, he would’ve stood there with a smug smile and say something like, “I told you he loves me more.” They make him way too dark and it really takes away from the fact he is a villain with moral code, but these writers have seemingly forgotten that with the exception of the one scene in episode 7 where he condemns Bing’s rape. Of course, the rapist might be getting a redemption arch anyways, not Charlie, but uh... moving on from all that past shit!). Yeah, as I was saying, they make Charlie darker. Okay, let’s forget my opinions on that for a moment: the characters have the opportunity to make him, this super evil and irredeemable villain, weak to the point he couldn’t get up at all... But Maggie stops him from being in this state? WHAT?! That shit is very out of character for her, and it’s very out of character for Vic to just stop! Vic would’ve persisted, and if the roles were reversed, Charlie would’ve persisted. That’s the thing about them both: they are persistent and protective about their kids. Why did Vic need to stop? “We need to find your son!” MAGGIE! You’ve both tried multiple times already! Focus on Charlie when you have the chance! How stupid are you two?! And better yet: Why would Vic drop the weapon?! She would’ve grabbed it!!!! What the hell is this shit?! I can’t even express how stupid this is... I get you can’t exactly kill him, but you could make absolute certain he would be subdued and unable to even have the chance to get up and grab his weapon. But nope! They need to attempt for the thousandth time to save Wayne in the exact same way, when it has shown not to work. You’d think they’d at least attempt to think of something else, even if their options are limited, but nah, we’re gonna do something very out of character instead... why?

Things aren’t looking too good for Maggie, so I have to ask: is Maggie gonna die? And if so, that is beyond fucking stupid. They set up the potential for a plot with Tabs and Mags for the third season. I didn’t pick up that they officially broke up, rather just separated for now, and... for what?! If she’s seriously gonna die, I’m gonna be extremely pissed. That wasted potential and insult to her character would be so fucking stupid. Yes, she dies in the book (in a different fashion, and it’s probably not that great how she goes there either), but look at all they’ve done for her character, especially giving her a girlfriend, a character that’s become even more important. Her death would be questionably more insulting here for sure!

Overall, while there were things I liked about this episode, I am majorly disappointed and concerned for the future of the series. I’m afraid it will take directions that are not good, and if it does continue, I am afraid it will be a living dead show of sorts. I think the only true way this show can carry on and be good is if all our main most important characters (Vic, Maggie, Charlie, Lou, Wayne, and Tabs) are all alive. Now, Vic and Charlie might be the only exception to this, just because they both do die in the book, and although even that is rough and not the best, it is expectant and I think this show can still be good with Maggie, Lou, Tabitha, and Linda taking care of Wayne (I’m not gonna go into the potential with Millie in this scenario because that’s a rocky topic lol). But if this show follows the path of TWD, where we have a whole new cast of characters you’re not really gonna care about and all the old cast you got to know and love is just gone... that’ll be the cherry on top of this shit sundae. I am excited for the concept of exploring the world of other Strong Creatives, as many rumors speculate the next season will contain, but if the show that explored the world of zombies failed by getting rid of pretty much their whole old cast... what about this show? They’ve already messed up quite a few things I don’t like this season I’ve discussed before, and if they go the route of doing anything that can get worse... I can’t describe how disappointing it would be. Not saying things have to be perfect or my way all the way, but it has to be generally good and enjoyable for everyone. Growing attached to a cast of characters only to erase many of them and focus on a new one is not a way that is good and enjoyable for everyone. AMC: This happened with TWD; for the love of God, don’t let it happen with NOS4A2.

As I said in my last review: let’s hope next week is better, and AMC, for the second time in a row, doesn’t deliver a disappointment of a show.

#nos4a2 #nos4a2 vic #nos4a2 charlie #nos4a2 maggie #maggie leigh #charlie manx #vic mcqueen

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tviseverything · 4 years

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So I’m rewatching Glee during this quarantine...

AND THERE HAS BEEN ONE THING IVE ALWAYS HATED ABOUT THIS GODDAMNED SHOW AND IT’S THE LACK OF CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

Let me explain.... the storylines in the show had the potential to set up the character development for each character and they missed it! And the people that had the ABSOLUTE MOST POTENTIAL FOR AWESOME CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT WERE QUINN, RACHEL, SANTANA, AND BRITTANY AND HERE’S WHY... Quinn edition because this is way too long for the other characters... I promise i’ll follow this up with the other ones. (BTW, this took me so long to do because life kept getting in the way but I finally finished it! Please give it a read and let me know if you agree or disagree. I am always open to discussion!! And swipe down all the way to be blessed with a couple of Quinn Fabray gifs!!)

Quinn is the first because let’s think about it for a sec. In the beginning of the series, Quinn was that typical queen bee, mean girl type who was on the cheerleading squad and ruthlessly bullied anyone who got in her way including Rachel. But then life throws her a curveball and she ends up getting pregnant.

This storyline set Quinn up to learn some very valuable lessons and some harsh truths. For example, Quinn gets kicked off the cheerleading squad after the news comes out that she’s pregnant and she’s kicked out of her home and disowned.

The first season was doing great handling her character development, for example, in 1x15, when the time came for yearbook pictures, Quinn was desperately trying to get back on the squad for the picture but in the end she thanks Sue for making her realize that she’d rather be part of a team that is proud to have her (Glee Club) instead of a team where she only appears to belong (Cheerios). (let me add that this scene also could have set up a slowburn for Faberry because in that same episode, Rachel was describing how school pictures are everything to her and that if she ever became famous, she would want her face in the year book picture and be prepared. Keep this in mind because later on Quinn blackmails Sue into giving up one of the Cheerio’s six pages and giving it to the Glee club free of charge. Quinn didn’t have to do this. Her entire goal was to get back on the Cheerios and not fight for the glee club photo. In fact, in the episode, she didn’t even want to be in it. So why did she do it? For Rachel, perhaps? any way this is about Quinn not faberry so lets get back to it)

Another example from before is she becomes friends with Mercedes. In episode 1x16, Mercedes is forced to starve herself for the Cheerios and in doing so, her blood pressure dropped which caused her to faint. Quinn recognized what Mercedes was doing and sympathized with her. She then helped Mercedes realize that she doesn’t need to be skinny to be beautiful and she is perfect the way she is and she sings a song about it as well while Quinn stands next to her, furthering her message. This episode created a beautiful friendship between Quinn and Mercedes that in later episodes, Mercedes offers her home to Quinn after connecting with her about being bullied and dealing with it. Let’s also add in the fact that this was before the Lucy Caboosy storyline, which in my opinion ruined her character even more but I’m not gonna get into that until later. In that season, Mercedes and Quinn were set up to be a great duo for season 2 but... Where the hell did all of that go???? Did they just completely forget that Quinn lived with Mercedes for a short while and that they bonded over similar experiences??? What the hell??? I would also like to add onto here that a friendship between Quinn and Kurt was a HUGE miss! They would have been an amazing duo!! Along with Mercedes of course. I will talk about this type of stuff in separate post!

ANOTHER example was when in episode 1x13, the truth about the baby’s father comes out which was Rachel’s fault. After drama ensues, Rachel goes to apologize and readies herself for a punch from Quinn, but in a surprising turn of events...Quinn forgives her. The old Quinn probably would thrown multiple slushies in Rachel’s face, call her names and maybe ruin her life. But this Quinn quickly forgave her and told Rachel that she did something that she wasn’t brave enough to do, tell the truth! She forgave Rachel even though she clearly knew that Rachel only told Finn to break them up so she could have him all to herself. This was a very pivotal moment in the series that would show how Quinn emotionally matured after what happened to her. (this scene also would have set up faberry perfectly as well but oh well)

Anyway, the whole point of this post is about the lack of character development in the series and while everything I just said argues against it...the character development from season one didn’t last very long especially when we start right off the bat in season 2, Quinn rejoins the Cheerios and tries to restore herself to her former glory. I understand why she would want that again but this alone completely destroyed her character development because after learning all the things she had learned while pregnant, she shouldn’t have wanted to go back to that old life again but she did. Add that onto the fact that in order to restore herself to her former glory, she also snitches on Santana about her “summer surgery” Pregnant Quinn wouldn’t have even thought to rat out her own friends but new and improved Quinn did and I HATED IT because of that knowledge. This could have been handled better by probably having Quinn join the cheerios again but have her use her power for good such as, protecting all of glee club from future slushies, made it so the jocks wouldn’t have so much power with bullying, or even set an example for cheerios for how they should act in the school. But instead they pull this shit.

I’m not finished!! Season 2 and beyond was a DISASTER for Quinn. The writers literally erased all of that character development just so they could create more drama. An example of this is the cheating storyline. Quinn had started dating Sam in the beginning of Season 2 and everything is going well for them until *sigh* Finn came along and convinced her to cheat on Sam with him. THIS IS LITERALLY ONE OF THE WORST STORYLINES ON GLEE. Finn knows what it was like to be cheated on (I know he cheated on Quinn in the first episode with Rachel but we’re not talking about that right now) Finn knows the pain of finding out that you’ve been lied to and betrayed so the fact he even had the AUDACITY to lure Quinn into cheating AGAIN infuriates me deep inside. You would think that after what happened when she cheated the first time, she would learn her lesson...BUT SHE DIDN’T. WTF. THIS RUINED HER CHARACTER EVEN MORE!!!!!! PLUS I HATE ALL THE UNNECESSARY DRAMA THAT STORYLINE CREATED, INCLUDING THE FEUD BETWEEN RACHEL AND QUINN.

I would also like to talk about the Lucy Caboosey storyline because it is a crucial fact to know about Quinn. The Lucy Caboosey storyline was introduced at the WORST POSSIBLE TIME. I am seriously convinced that Ryan Murphy only wrote that in to create “depth” to Quinn’s character. If they were going to do that storyline at all, then they should have introduced it in the first season or should have created a better plot to accomodate to the storyline. This storyline also didn’t add anything to the Prom Queen storyline. I honestly wish that the writer’s have taken Quinn’s character development from season 1 into account because if they had, then I believe that the Lucy Caboosey storyline and the Prom Queen storyline wouldn’t have existed and these storylines only exist as Ryan Murphys attempt to reverse all of the depth that Dianna Agron gave to the character and make her a basic, self-centered blonde cheerleader and when that didn’t work out... the Lucy Caboosey storyline was there to give Quinn “depth”

I would also like to talk Quinn’s obsession with winning Prom Queen and taking Finn to the prom (Finn was an asshat in this episode by the way but let’s not focus on him). I really wished that the writers took Quinn’s character development into account because if they had, then Quinn wouldn’t have been reverted back into the 2 dimensional, blonde, cheerleader character like she was at the beginning of the series and she also wouldn’t have had a storyline involving Lucy Caboosey. Her taking Finn to the prom was a complete bullshit storyline as well because we all know that relationship between Quinn and Finn was only there to drag the love triangle between them and rachel into the next season even though it was very clear that Quinn and Finn weren’t gonna get back together in the first season.

Also at the end of that season, where nationals took place, there was a scene between Quinn and Brittany and Santana where Quinn breaks down, this should have been one of those pivotal character development moments where she makes a realization about herself and tries to live her truth, but no! She cuts her hair and all is well.

Before we move on to season 3, I want to talk about the Celibacy Club and religion in regards to Quinn Fabray. As we all know, Quinn was the captain of the Cheerios and president of the Celibacy Club (even though that didn’t last long...whoops) so the theme of celibacy and religion go hand in hand for Quinn. I would have really like to see a storyline of Quinn losing faith in her religion, whether that may be because God decided to make Quinn pregnant and in result get disowned by her family or (in my perfect world) Quinn starts to realize that she might like girls and because of how her family is, she struggles with it. That would have been an interesting storyline to see and it would have tackled the topic of religion as well! I would have liked to see this as an ongoing theme for Quinn throughout the show but of course Ryan Murphy had to be a shitty writer.

This post became wayyyy to long for my attention span so I am going to break this down into parts. Also I am so sorry that this post is all over the place but I had to write it all down before I lost the train of thought so some explanations might not be as in depth as others and it might not be in order so again I apologize. So I will talk about Quinn in season 3 and the rest of the seasons when she shows up from time to time.

#glee #glee rewatch #faberry #quinn fabray #character development #mercedes jones #Kurt Hummel #rachel

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foxtophat · 3 years

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MERRY CHRISTMAS IN JANUARY EVERYONE yeah i know ~nothing is fixed~ but whatever, fuck you, have some fanfic

so anyway i’ve been planning this for a while, i’m kinda shocked tho b/c i finished writing it in like less than 3 days??? (aside from editing) usually it takes me longer to at least figure out how to wrap things up, but at least this one was easy money. i’m sure none of the other ones will be so kind to me

this one takes place a month or so after the last one; it’s set in spring 2028 (omfg finally on a new year!!!!) and it has a little something to do with carmina finally getting some chickens!!!! one thing about new dawn that i think was really lacking is the explanation of how life... restarted before the highwaymen. i definitely remember a few houses having chicken coops, too, so i know i’m not crazy putting these feathered friends in. to me, chickens are the most sensible post-apocalyptic pet outside of a dog; easy to care for, provide food while alive AND after death, and they can reproduce easily enough if you’ve got a rooster on hand. i can imagine a family making quite a life for themselves as a poultry farm in the apocalypse!

ugh idk what else to say so i’ll just say it: thank you so much for all of your comments and kudos on this series. i am so stoked to know that my self-indulgent trash is delicious to more than just my possum ass! i’ve had a lot of fun worldbuilding in ubisoft’s playground, and i hope to continue doing more fun stuff that other people will enjoy too!!!

with all that said, i hope you enjoy the fic :) i’ll put it below the cut for you if you don’t wanna leave tumblr, but ao3 looks so much better. anyway, thank you and have a great jan 20th!!!!

Winter melts away the same way it does every year, leaving in its path wet dirt and green buds of spring growth. John, nursing what's likely the last cup of coffee they can wring from this batch of grounds, stares out over the back yard and idly marvels at how quickly the snow had disappeared. Montana had been his first experience with white winters; even though he's gotten used to the changing seasons in theory, though, he can't help but be distracted by it year after year.

Across the yard, situated just in sight by the hangar, John can plainly see Carmina's new chickens looking for breakfast. They're the newest addition to the homestead, but so far John has only had to watch from afar as the Ryes worked to adjust them to their new home. He's not sure who's raising chickens out here, but at least they were willing to barter. Fresh eggs are going to mean a lot more than the dwindling supplies out of Jacob's cache.

The misty-gray of early morning has almost evaporated in the rising sunlight, and still the chickens haven't been fed. John watches them from where he stands, their frustration leading to subdued crows as they scratch at the dirt. He doesn't know who's noisier — them, or Nick and Kim arguing at the table behind him. Thank Christ the wet end of winter is over; John doesn't think he can tolerate much more of their married nagging. On some level, he's glad they don't make a habit of yelling at him instead of each other, but Jesus, he can't wait for them to both get some space from one another.

"This is why we said we weren't gonna do pets, remember?" Nick says. "Because if she got a pet, we would end up taking care of it. Remember?"

"Yes, Nick, I remember."

"Yeah, and here we are!"

Kim sighs. John doesn't have to look to see the exasperated eye-roll that comes with it. "It wasn't me who kept her up late last night! Which one of us was egging her on when she should have been asleep?"

This is exactly why John has never owned a pet. They're more trouble than they're worth, and the only thing they seem to be good for is teaching shitty life lessons to kids who don't care enough to learn. The only good thing about the chickens is that they provide something in return other than obnoxious crowing.

Carmina thumps around upstairs. John isn't looking forward to having to listen to Kim lecture her on responsibility, but he's not thrilled to listen to much more of this bickering, either. If his choices are to stay inside and fester or go out into the first nice day of the year — well, that's not much of a choice, is it?

"Fine," John sighs before either of the Ryes can set their sights on him, "I'll do it."

"Nobody's asking you to do it," Kim replies. "It's Carmina's responsibility."

John shakes his head. "Of course it is. Where's the feed?"

Nick points out a white plastic container sitting on the pass-through to the kitchen. "Not gonna wait for us to boss you around?" he asks.

John picks up the container and rattles it to make sure it's full. "I'm streamlining the process," he replies. "Unless you enjoy giving me orders."

Sure enough, implying Nick might like being a bossy piece of shit is enough to get him to shut up. He sighs with a deep frown at John, who ignores him as he heads out to the coop. It's a petty satisfaction to take the rug out from under Nick's feet, but John's not above it. Not by a long shot.

Some of it might be compensating for the disintegrating peace that had come with winter. Before the blizzard set in, they'd had enough on their collective plates as they prepared for the worst of the season. Afterward, the snow had prevented them from doing much more than what was necessary to survive, and the resulting downtime had settled like a comfortable blanket. Even now, with a few weeks of grating interpersonal interactions, John feels more focused, more rested than he can ever remember feeling. Living underground for eight years, he'd naively thought that he'd gotten enough rest to last him a lifetime — but he'd been strung out on Bliss and trying not to suffocate, and he hadn't known what he was doing. He's starting to suspect that the Bliss might've had a worse effect on him than the myriad other drugs he'd ingested. Hell, he's not sure he's clean even now — but he's managing, and that's what matters.

It's only once he's halfway across the yard that John realizes Kim forgot to argue about him going off on his own. Sure, he's only going as far as the hangar, but it's become something of a pleasantry she uses whenever John pretends to have the freedom to go where he pleases. Her irritation at Carmina and Nick probably made her forget. She's gotten so used to trusting John that she's finally found other things to take up her attention.

Weirdly enough, the casual disregard for his potential backslide irritates him. It really shouldn't. He should be thrilled that he can finally disappear from view for an hour without somebody calling out a search party. He's more than earned it, he thinks, but their trust highlights their naivety. Luckily for them, John means it when he says he's changed — but it's a line they're going to hear time and again from people far less genuine than he's been. They're so willing to help everyone and anyone that they don't even realize how much of a target they're making themselves. John's had to hold his tongue whenever Nick gives free supplies to shifty-eyed tweakers who are "just passing through," and while he trusts Kim not to let anyone obviously suspicious into the house, he doesn't trust her to recognize a cunning liar.

The last thing John needs is for the Ryes to put their trust in the wrong reformed psychopath. At least he's capable of picking up their slack. After all, John has his time at law school and years of psychological abuse under his belt — plenty of real-world experience dealing with unrepentant garbage. He'll notice it when somebody cases the hangar or acts too erratically, and hopefully the Ryes will listen to him if he gets the nerve to voice his concerns.

Not for the first time since summer, John is struck with a newfound respect for Jacob and the role he'd inhabited in the Project. It used to be his job to look out for insurrectionists, and he'd taken on that burden even when John and Joseph would openly dismiss his concerns. John can't imagine how many fires Jacob must've put out while the rest of the family was distracted by the Bliss. Looking back on it now, it's honestly a surprise they maintained their operation as long as they did, considering only one of the four of them was ever sober.

The chickens are hopping at his arrival, scuttling around the dirt and crowing as John reaches the pen. They don't notice him so much as the bin he rattles on approach, full of vegetable cuttings and strange white worms that come out whenever it rains. John doesn't mind one lick — he's never been much of an animal person, and he certainly doesn't care if Carmina's so-called pets notice his existence. Of course, knowing Carmina, she's going to use this as an excuse to shift breakfast duty to John full-time, and John won't have much of a say in the matter.

Well, that's not strictly true, but if Carmina asked, he knows he would do it, if only to give his day more structure. Truthfully, he's grown to depend on routine, when before it was impossible to keep to a schedule that didn't involve other people's expectations of him. There's probably a metaphor to be made about trains on and off the tracks, but John has never been particularly interested in locomotives.

John shakes the dead bugs and scraps out into the pen, watching the hens as they race to be the first to eat. They're perfectly happy now that they've been fed, cooing and clucking as they peck the dirt. They certainly seem content with safety and food — not entirely unlike the survivors living day-to-day in the town and beyond. Sure, John might not always be satisfied by bare sustenance, and one day he'll chafe under the grind of surviving week to week, but for now, he might as well be a dumb chicken crowing in the morning sun.

He throws some more feed into the pen, watching the three hens waddle after their meal. One of them lingers by the fence, freezing for a moment as her head swivels back and forth. She pecks at the dirt away from the feed before hustling after her two companions. John watches as she stops again; when he tosses a few worms in her direction, she pecks briefly at them before lifting her head to survey her surroundings.

The primal sensation of something being wrong nearly overtakes John's reasoning, before he manages to remind himself that a chicken's predators aren't exactly his to worry about. Still, he rattles the container to bring the hens scuttling towards him; all three are easily distracted by food now, but John can't shake the feeling that he'd missed something they hadn't. A fox, maybe? A snake? Anything could be lurking in the woods on the other side of the wash. Not a whole lot that could hurt him , of course, but he's not about to be blamed for Carmina's chickens being eaten by a wild dog.

The fence-line is... nebulous past the hangar, sure, but John's positive Kim doesn't consider the rest of the old airport off-limits. Then again, she might be in the mood to lecture him once she gets through with Carmina. It's a risk he's not sure he's willing to take.

Two chickens continue to eat as one keeps watch, their heads bobbing up and down as they switch off. Their unease mirrors his own, and John can imagine Faith giggling at him for being swayed by some dumb birds.

"Very well, ladies," he sighs, shaking the remainder of their breakfast onto the ground. "Don't let them say I don't care."

The chickens don't give three shits about John's motivations, of course; they watch him go, pecking at the food with increasing carelessness as the distance grows. John rolls his eyes at their sudden fearlessness, half-convinced to let whatever animal is lurking eat them out of spite.

There's a wide swath of dirt behind the hangar, separating it from the mostly-overgrown remnants of Rye Aviation that couldn't be saved. John can see the edge of the chicken pen from here, but the hangar is blocking him from the house. Even though he knows the Ryes trust him not to run off, he still feels distinctly uneasy going somewhere where they can't see him. At this point, Nick would probably only tease him for it, but John's not about to linger out here and risk turning Kim's irritation on himself.

To the right of the derelict hangars is a sparse wedge of trees that have grown in uninterrupted. John knows there's a path cut between the trunks, one he'd made himself while hauling the tire-planters for Kim last year, and there's a long stretch of unused runway beyond it. It isn't a great place for anything bigger than a fox to lurk in. That doesn't explain the feeling of being watched that comes over him as he stops halfway across the empty dirt lot; he looks around, but there's no place for anything to hide out here. The overgrowth on the old hangars can't be more than two feet high, and the bushes in the copse are brambly and sparse. The only place anything could hide would be in the trees, which is why John approaches them with more caution than they're worth.

The thinned underbrush is easy to explore, but John goes carefully as he picks through the trees and bushes. He doesn't know exactly what he's looking for — some sign of predators, whatever those might be — but he doesn't find much. There are some hoof-prints clear in the dirt, curving sharply away from the Rye homestead and back out to the airstrip, which tells John that the goddamn deer are back, probably looking to eat their hard-grown crops. Other than that, there's no sign of anything that might be stalking the hen-house. The ground is still somewhat soft from the rain a few nights ago, but it barely takes the imprint of John's boots as he explores the small grove.

That's why it's such a shock to see the tread of a narrow boot in the dirt by the trunk of one of the trees, well off the beaten path. It's an old print, he thinks — but he doesn't remember the last time any one of them had been out this way. Certainly not since the last time it rained.

An electric shock conducts itself down his spine. Somebody had been out here, hiding here in the trees, and it's only been two, three days since the last rain. John turns, and from his vantage point, he can clearly see the coop and the back of the hangar, but not the house. For that, he'd have to move out of the trees, into direct view of the porch.

It has to be Grace's boot. She's the only one he could imagine creeping around the property with good intentions. But even that explanation doesn't settle the anxious flip of his stomach; he tries not to let it show as he marches from the trees, intent on dragging Nick over and proving to him once and for all that they need to be more goddamn careful about who they let around the property. Somebody is going to want the copper fixtures they've salvaged, even if there's nobody to sell the metal to these days.

John gets halfway back to the coop when he catches something in his peripheral vision. Terrible, primal terror grips him as he fixes his gaze on the trick of the light that had scared him, ready to catch Grace peering at him over the abandoned hangars, or maybe a pack of wild dogs. What he sees instead turns his blood to ice, caught like a deer in headlights as the low-hanging shrubbery and thick vines shift and part for a rising mass of dark brown fur. The shape that rises from the underbrush is a tall, dark smudge against the blue sky, and John nearly swallows his tongue when he sees its face — or the horrifying absence of one, replaced with white, flaking skin and two huge, empty eye-sockets that are fixed on John's position.

It doesn't move. Neither does John, frozen to the spot as the chickens begin to crow and fuss. He can't fathom what he's looking at — a bear, a person, a fucking mutant? — but whatever it is, he suspects it's infected with Bliss. Who knows how many angels ended up underground after the Collapse? What might've happened to them in the years since? All John knows about them is that they're dangerous to everybody but Faith, and Faith died a decade ago. If this is an angel — God, there'll be no stopping it. And if it isn't — then what the hell is it ?

There's no way for John to get from here to the house without the thing chasing him. The hangar is blocking his brutal oncoming murder from the two people who might actually be able to do something about it. He doesn't have to look to know the distance from here to the house is insurmountable.

The creature lifts its arm, and the situation that couldn't get any worse takes an even more horrifying turn as it reveals its weapon of choice: a crudely fashioned bow, the same kind of handmade weaponry that Joseph's followers have been seen with.

All at once, Nick's voice is ringing in John's ears, warning him of what's going to happen if this gargoyle takes him away. The things John hadn't considered before — the Ryes' reputation, Carmina's safety, the hard-won trust John's gained from the survivors — it's all in jeopardy. The situation barrels into him all at once — the realization that whatever Joseph did to create this thing , he won't hesitate to turn on John.

He tries to shout a warning, but his breath is caught in his throat. Faith's voice, faint on the breeze, laughs and whispers sing-song into his ear:

They've found you!

The monster barrels down the slope of the hill as if prodded into action by a hot poker. Its gait is wide, bringing it towards John at speeds impossible to outrun. This time, John's shout comes out clear as a bell, panic screaming through him as he turns and bolts for the house. He nearly clips himself on the pen as he hangs a sharp right turn, the porch coming into full sight —

Something snags the back of John's shirt, and his momentum briefly chokes him. A thick arm bears down across his neck before he can rip free, the creature grunting in exertion as it yanks him backward. John feels his boots scrape on the dirt as he's dragged towards the trees, away from the safety that's plain in sight.

Animal instinct kicks in. John gnashes his teeth but there's nothing to bite, so he kicks out his feet instead, first in front of him and then harshly backward until he can hook his shin behind his assailant's and trip them both to the ground. The creature goes down with a surprised grunt; John does his best to roll away, only to be yanked back by his hair. He's distantly aware that he's spitting like a cat in a sack, clawing and biting, the two of them rolling in the dirt as John screams profanities and heresy at the monster trying to pin him down, anything to convince the universe to take mercy on him for once in his fucking life!

The creature manages to grab him by the shoulder, throwing him into the dirt before backhanding him violently across the face. It's enough to daze him; for one horrible second, he's unable to do anything as the monster begins to drag him across the dirt by the legs.

There's a commotion coming from the house. For a split second, the creature looks up, and John realizes his opening at the same time the monster realizes its mistake. It looks down just in time for John to kick it square in its barky, hollow-eyed face, sending a split down the wooden facade.

" John !"

The monster reels backward as if burned, grabbing at the mask as it falls away. John catches sight of a single dark, wild eye behind the broken wood before he kicks out again, sending both boots into his assailant's chest. As soon as the creature staggers back, John bolts, scrambling towards Kim as she races toward him with the rifle drawn. Nick is hot behind her; he grabs John's shoulder and drags him partway back to the house. John doesn't need the escort, and so Nick quickly leaves him to scramble up the porch as he goes after his wife.

John gets all the way to the stairs inside before he realizes there's no safe place to hide. He'd found out this winter just how flimsy the prisoner story had been; if somebody wants to take him, all they have to do is climb onto the roof and jimmy the lock on the nearest window. Whether it's through the broken window in his room or a gap in the roof leading to the attic, the Project will find him. He can't possibly outrun them forever. He'd be stupid to even try. God, he'd been a fool for thinking Joseph wouldn't send someone looking for him, that he wouldn't want to snatch John back from the clutches of apostasy. There's no way Joseph will leave a loose end like him untied.

John sinks to the bottom steps in his mounting despair, only to realize for a second time that he's being watched. The realization is less of a shock as Carmina peers at him around the kitchen archway; she jumps at the distant rapport of gunfire, staring owl-eyed at John as though she expects him to do something.

"Stay down," John hisses, setting an example as he keeps low on his way into the kitchen.

"What happened?" Carmina asks, frantic, "Is mom gonna be okay?"

"Yes," John replies, although he can't possibly know that for sure. He waits a beat, listening for more gunshots, then carefully lifts his head to check out the window when none come. He lets out the breath he'd been holding when he sees Nick standing with his hands on his hips, staring at Kim further down the yard. Whatever the danger had been, it's not pressing enough to warrant immediate action.

"Seriously," Carmina whines, as if that could hide her fear. "What was it? Was it a bear? Grace says there are bears in the woods but I've never seen —"

John sinks to the ground, his mind reeling even as the panic passes, leaving him numb. "It wasn't a bear."

Carmina chews on her lower lip, looking up towards the window as though she might try looking for herself. "Are the chickens okay?" she asks.

"They're fine," he sighs. He pushes his hair from his face, only to realize that his hands have started to tremble with run-off adrenaline.

"Are... you okay?" she asks, frowning as though she can't decide whether or not his wellbeing is her problem to deal with.

Goodwill must be genetic, John laments. "I'm fine," he tells her. She gives his shaking hands a hard look; he sighs and reiterates, "I'll be fine. Don't worry about me."

"I'm not," Carmina huffs. Apparently, Nick's attempts to teach Carmina how to bluff haven't worked out.

John is saved from needing to reassure her as Nick abruptly appears in the kitchen arch, out of breath and red-faced. His shock gives way to relief at the sight of the two of them huddled by the counter. He's out of breath and visibly bewildered.

"Shit, John, you okay?"

"I'm fine," he says, although he doubts Nick will believe it any more than Carmina had. His foot jogs uselessly against the floor. "Kim — did she...?"

Nick shakes his head. "She tried," he says, "But it was too fast. What the fuck was it ?"

"Somebody from the Project."

"No shit. But — look, it wasn't an angel , was it?"

John shakes his head. "I don't know."

Kim storms into view, making her way to the pass-through from the living room side. She sets the rifle down on the counter, catching John's eye with a glare. John hurries to explain himself, as if he could possibly apologize for bringing the cult back to her doorstep.

"I was checking for foxes," he tells her, "I didn't think it — if I'd known what it was, I wouldn't have gone on my own."

Despite the fury in her eyes and the hard edge to her voice, Kim seems to mean it when she replies, "As long as nobody's hurt."

But the damage is done, and John can't help but babble on uselessly. "I wasn't looking in the right place. But I shouted as soon as I saw it. I just — couldn't outrun it. I wasn't fast enough. And I wasn't — it was stronger than I expected, stronger than..." Even he can hear the panic edging into his voice, cutting himself off with one last worried question. "Do you think it's gone?"

"It better be, if it knows what's good for it," Kim replies. "Are you sure you're okay?"

At any other time, John would be irritated to have to reassure every single Rye individually that he isn't in the throes of a panic attack. Right now, he's only grateful to realize that Kim doesn't blame him for the thing's appearance.

"I am," he says. "Thank you."

Nick groans, covering his eyes with one hand as he leans against the counter. "So much for it being safe to go out alone. Damn it, we got too comfortable."

" I got too comfortable," John says. "It wouldn't have cared about either of you."

"What about the chickens?" Carmina asks, "Are they safe there?"

Kim crosses her arms. "What I want to know is what the hell the Project is doing out here."

Her question is the only one John has any insight into, although he doesn't know how realistic his theory is. "They might be hunting deer," he says. "The only thing I saw, other than — than that , were deer tracks."

"All the way out here?" Kim asks skeptically.

"The hunting can't be any good in that swamp they're hiding in," Nick points out, frowning as he considers the idea. "And there are more survivors around the river these days. I'd bet that'd make for slim pickings."

"I doubt we'd even know they come out this far if I hadn't been the one out there. At least we've confirmed they're actively searching for resources beyond their compound — and they're relying on traditional methods to do so. Most likely because the armory was destroyed."

"Thank God for the Deputy," Nick sighs. "Okay. We're just gonna have to... I dunno, be willing to shoot, I guess." He doesn't sound so sure about it, and he quickly softens the intention. "At least a couple more warning shots. Once they remember guns outstrip arrows every way but sustainability, they'll probably keep back."

"We can push the fence-line out, too," Kim says. "It won't necessarily stop them, but at least it'll give them a line to cross. They're not cavemen — they remember property laws and how those get enforced around here."

"We'll have to start checking the traps more often. They might be living like bloodthirsty Mennonites right now, but that doesn't mean they aren't willing to steal to survive."

"They'll justify it one way or another," John sighs.

"So I guess we don't have to move the chickens after all," Nick says, "So long as we establish a perimeter. Sound good, Carmina?"

Carmina must have slipped out at some point during the conversation because she's nowhere to be found in the kitchen. Nick glances over John's head and out the window, swearing loudly.

"What the hell is she doing out there?"

John gets to his feet as Nick and Kim take off. He watches them through the window as they chase after Carmina, who's stopped to look around partway towards the coop. Either she's dumber than she seems, or she's inherited both of her parents' reckless streaks. Either way, she's going to leave herself open the same way John had. She's too confident that nobody wants to hurt her. The only way John knows how to teach that lesson, though, is not one that Kim or Nick would approve of — and so he sidelines his worries in favor of sticking with whoever is more armed than he is.

By the time John comes outside, Kim is knee-deep in the middle of a heated lecture about safety and responsibility. Carmina scowls at her feet, her face turning red as she's scolded. John ignores them, passing them by in favor of catching up with Nick, who's come to a stop a few yards past the coop. He's staring out into the unoccupied land — land that used to be his property, once. Now Nick is as much a stranger here as John is.

"Check it out," Nick says, holding out a thin, white-barked piece of wood. John takes it and recognizes it immediately as part of the mask he'd broken in two. The hole for the eye is a roughly cut gouge in the soft wood, and the bark flakes as he wipes his thumb across it.

"I hadn't even considered a mask," John admits. "I thought it was a monster."

"You and me both," Nick replies. He heaves a sigh. "Still waiting for the mutants to crawl out of the sewers, I guess. But I think we can handle a couple of jackasses with arrows."

John squints across the clearing, as if maybe his assailant has hung around waiting for them to reappear. "Next time, it might be Joseph," he points out grimly. "That hunter recognized me immediately. They'll tell him I'm here, and he'll want to find me."

"Come on. Like Joseph's gonna risk crossing enemy territory on foot. I'd be more worried about those goddamn hunting parties you used to send out."

John unconsciously reaches up to rub his throat. "Yeah," he says. "You're right. One of them clearly wasn't enough, but if Joseph decides I'm worthwhile, they'll come as a pack. If he's still manufacturing Bliss somehow, it would be easy to subdue me. And then..."

He's surprised out of his would-be reverie as Nick slaps his shoulder with a heavy hand. "We're not gonna let that happen," he says. "As long as you put up the same fight you did today, Kim and I are gonna come running."

Despite the reality of hidden archers and surprise ambushes, John allows himself to be reassured by the sentiment. At the very least, he pretends for Nick's sake. "I suppose you two were quick to the rescue," he drawls. "But if they get me to the tree-line, I'd rather you just put me down before I get dragged all the way back to the compound."

Nick chuckles. "We'll try to avoid that for now."

Looking over his shoulder, John catches Kim crouched down in front of Carmina, hands on her shoulders. Whatever she's saying, it's too quiet for John to hear, but Carmina's sniffles are a loud precursor to a lot of tears.

"I guess she believed you when you said the Project wouldn't care about us," Nick sighs. "At this rate, we're gonna have to put a bell on her."

"I could tell her about the child soldiers from the summer camp, if that would prove the gravity of the situation."

Just the mention of it makes Nick look a little queasy, and John immediately regrets bringing it up. "I don't want to scare her that badly," Nick says. "She's a good kid, she means well. She just needs to stop going off half-cocked, is all." He rubs his hand across his forehead and complains, "I thought we taught her to be smarter than this."

"She's still your kid," John says. Nick gives him a sour look, but it's the truth no matter how bitter Nick might feel about it. "You can't expect her to be utterly obedient, given her genetics."

"I guess ." He sighs, shaking his head. "At any rate, it's time we stop sugar-coating the cult for her benefit. She's obviously not taking it seriously."

John looks again and sees Kim embracing Carmina tightly. He can't help but worry about what might happen if the hunters come back. When he'd been with the Project, he'd understood Joseph's motivations — at least superficially — but now he's completely in the dark. They used to fill their ranks with abducted children and their desperate parents. He has no idea if Joseph is in a position to expand his flock, but if he is... John does not doubt that they'll start with the young and impressionable. Carmina, being young but not as impressionable as they'd like, probably wouldn't make it back to the compound before she got herself killed. He can't imagine anyone having enough patience to break her.

"You... uh, think we should be worried?" Nick asks after a brief stretch of silence.

"Not yet," John replies grimly. After all, the Ryes have a bargaining chip like no other, in case their daughter is ever taken. John can see to it that she's left alone, but it will only work once — and after that, who knows which brother will be sending hunters after her.

"Good thing we got ourselves a couple of extra guns," Nick says. "You and her are gonna have to start carrying pretty much everywhere."

"I'm sure people will love that."

"Fuck people, man, did you see the size of that fucking guy?"

John can't help a wry smile. "They weren't so big. If I were a couple of years younger, I would have taken them."

"Yeah, sure. "

The lecture must be over with for now, as Carmina's attention has turned back to her chickens. Kim watches her from a distance; John can't read her expression from here, but her posture is tense and defensive. John can't blame her — he doesn't have a parental bone in his body, but the stress of raising a child in these conditions isn't lost on him. Trying to instill a sense of fear into somebody who lived their formative years without a threat in sight can't be easy. Doubly so, considering Carmina can no doubt outgun the rudimentary weaponry the Project is utilizing. Hell, maybe they really are only a threat to him. Maybe it doesn't matter if Carmina sneaks out of the house.

"She won't leave unnoticed again," John decides, because it's the only promise he can genuinely keep.

"Oh yeah? You're gonna eat those words when she's a teenager."

"I'd hope she would be smart enough to bring back up by then."

"Me too." Nick exhales loudly enough to get Kim's attention, stretching one arm over his chest, then the other. "Well, I guess we better get started if we want to have anything to show for it by nightfall."

Even so, it takes Nick another moment before he brings himself to move. John lingers behind, unable to help himself as he eyes the trees distrustfully. There's nothing saying that hunter isn't still out there, watching them from a safe distance. If Jacob had a hand in training them, it's unlikely that John will ever see them coming again. He's likely lost the one chance at a level playing field, and he hadn't even realized it was something he could lose.

Fuck it. It doesn't matter. John has adapted time and again to every disaster in his life, and there's something to be said for the person who he's become. If this is the next catastrophe that he'll have to weather, then so be it. If he isn't capable of dealing with Joseph by now, then it's likely he never will be — and if that turns out to be the case, he can only hope that Kim is as quick on the trigger as she seemed to be today.

#far cry new dawn #fcnd #john seed #nick rye #kim rye #carmina rye #far cry fanfic #my fic #ugh tagging sucks on this site #mercyverse

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tar-oh · 4 years

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Pick-a-Pile: What will the end of 2020 look like for you?

A lovely anon requested me to do a pick-a-pile on your life at the end of 2020, and so here we are! And, honestly you guys are getting spoiled because I used my Lovely Omens deck which was really intended to be only used for my own readings on myself, but I made the exception today because I connect with it really well and thought it would be fun to see what it would say.

For the piles I pulled out some of my collection of Argento movies for the piles. Choose whichever movie speaks to you! If you’re into Argento and you’ve seen them, then cool! Let’s be friends. Outside of that, that’s fine! Let’s still be friends! Anyway, choose whichever pile calls to you. Remember, take what resonates. This is not the end-all-be-all, and this may not be what really happens because it’s what the current energy is leading to. Your energy can change tomorrow and so can your future, so, don’t take it to heart. This is more of a fun, what-if. And if you get to December 31st and you’re finding that this is did happen for you, let me know! So, anyway. Take what resonates, not what doesn’t! Also, you’re welcome to pick more than one pile, so if you want to, you can! OKAY! Here are the piles:

Pile 1:

Cards: letter, book, fish, queen of pentacles, temperance, the moon, 10 of wands reversed, 3 of cups, judgement, uruz, othala, wunjo, kenaz

Pile 1, I think by the end of the year, things are going to be going better for you. I'm not sure where you are currently (like if these things have happened already, or will be soon), but I see that you'll be feeling more secure overall. There are a few specific things that I think may only apply to a few people, so I'll get those out of the way. Also, if you were going between pile 1 and 2, maybe read pile 2 as well. There's a lot about finding creativity in this pile, and you chose the movie Suspiria, which is technically a horror movie, but the base of the plot is that a girl is attending a foreign dance school. I think some of you may be dancers, or are discovering your passion for dance. I also kind of get this from the 3 of cups, since they look like they're having fun. They don't look like they're celebrating as much as other versions of that card, and they don't look like their moving very fast, so maybe you're into interpretive dance, or something? Maybe singing, so maybe you sing, but I’m getting more dance. Like, maybe you like to move slow, but deliberately. There is actually a remake of Suspirira that has interpretive dance rather than ballet like in the original. Either way, I see that you could be a dancer. And if not a dancer, I think you could just be really creative, but specifically something with music or dance. And again, especially because you chose this movie. One of the things that stands out with this movie is the score by Gobiln. They're kind of known for doing weird out-there scores (I’ll link a video of a song from this movie so you can see what I mean lol), but it's very specific to this movie, so I definitely am leaning more towards music and dance. Maybe you don't do it publicly, it's just something you do in your own time that really makes you feel good about yourself. A few of the cards can talk about creativity, so maybe you're just finding the perfect balance of how to express yourself. I think you're focusing more on this creativity at the end of the year.

For others, another specific thing I'm getting is that maybe you're graduating from or even starting business school. For others, you could be training for something specific for work. Or just training for something in general. Learning something. And others maybe its law school, or economics major. For everyone, though I see you learning something. Whether it be educational or just something random. For some, you may be learning about a secret through a letter or a book, and this could be about money or work. The Moon card really adds to this, so I think you'll be ending the year a little more enlightened about something. The movie also kind of goes with this! It's kind of a mystery and the main character Susie is trying to figure out what's going on in her school, and so maybe you'll solve a mystery! lol Maybe nothing so exciting, but I suppose that's also depends on the context. I do definitely take the moon to mean that this is something you're not supposed to know. At least NOT YET. Like, the moon always comes up for me like that in tarot when it’s something I’m not really supposed to know yet, so I think it's just something you're not supposed to worry about and be more present and when the time comes around, enjoy the whole mystery of it all. I definitely think you've gone through some sort of rebirth this year. I don't know if this is happening at the end of the year, or if you've gone through it already, but by the end of the year you're going to be different in some way. It could just be how you express yourself (going back to that creativity), or even who you're around. I feel like you're finding out who is good for you and who isn't, so its possible your friend group will be different by end of the year. And that's not a bad thing! As people, we all grow and sometimes we grow out of people. I think there could also be new people coming around too (maybe even meeting people online, which what the letter kind of hints to me and the song I was listening to mentioned a letter so I definitely am going with that lol). I think you're going through a lot of healing this year, and maybe more so near the end. And this goes with that rebirth. I don't know what's happened in the past to need this healing (but I suppose we all have our wounds), but I think you're learning more about who you are and what you like. I think you're doing amazing job-wise. You got a few runes that suggest prosperity, and I also see Queen of Pentacles and Temperance attributing to this too. The Queen of Pentacles is someone who is prosperous and abundant, but is also motherly (and I just am getting at this as a quality rather than you being an actual mother, so even if you’re not a mom, I just mean like having that kind of vibe to you). So it's like this good balance between knowing how to get shit done, but also doing it in a compassionate way. The Ten of Wands reversed can talk about letting go of burdens and simplification. So I think by the end of the year, you've weeded out what doesn't work for you. I think, especially after the year the whole world has had, you are learning what matters to you and you're living your life to it's full potential by the time we're leaving this shitty year behind. I think you're doing better in terms of finances, I'm not seeing that you're like super rich, but again, you got a lot of stuff that suggests prosperity. And this might not even mean just materially. This could just be that you're just feeling so much better about life and yourself. Maybe you're abundant with love, finding new love, expanding on existing love, whatever that means for you. I always take Judgement to mean karma, but I see this as good karma for you. And, while I was writing your pile out, Marina's Karma came on, so I definitely think the way you're ending your year is how it's supposed to go. Maybe the way to get there has changed drastically with the way things have gone, but either way, there were multiple paths there, so I think either way you were going to get there. So, your end of the year is looking good! I don't really see anything that concerns me, honestly. I think you're on the right path and you're going to be feeling good about yourself. I'm really proud of you!

Songs: (a lot of the songs were super specific, so I’m only posting a few of the ones that seem to stand out more)

The theme from Suspiria in case you’re interested (there’s a version with just the bells I listen to because this ones kind of creepy but it also makes me laugh)

these days - nico (this definitely goes with figuring out what you want to do, I think) watergun - lostboycrow (gonna be honest there’s like 5 artists and one of them lists himself like twice lmao so idk who the actual artist is. i feel that way about anything olivver the kid is involved with)

karma - marina

Pile 2:

Cards: 10 of pentacles, 5 of pentacles, the hermit, king of cups reversed, knight of wands reversed, 5 of wands, the fool reversed, jera, isa, raidho, the lady, the rider, scythe I'm seeing three possible scenarios, 2 are similar, but one is permanent as opposed to the other which is only temporary. So, first, I want to talk about the movie you chose. Inferno is part of a series by Dario Argento, but honestly the only two of the series at that matter are Inferno and Suspiria (the one from pile 1, so if you were going between the two, I think this means you should read that one too). I can't really give you too much about the plots of either because they're both really hard to explain without giving the whole thing away. However, I can say this: It's about an apartment building where people start to disappear from and the only thing that connects them is that they're starting to figure some things out about the history of the place. I can't get more into it, especially because Inferno is kind of an infuriating movie in that it has no main character and you spend most of it going "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON" which kind of leads me to your pile. I really think prior to what happens later this year or currently/ what already happened, you were in this weird state where you weren't sure where things were going. I think there was a lot of stagnation in your life, and it could also be in multiple areas (love, work, anything really). I think this lead to frustration and apathy on your part. I think there will be/ was something cut off. For some, it’s permanent. For others, it was only temporary. And, this makes sense because if this already happened for you, it could have had to do with quarantine. Maybe you lost your job or you did temporarily. I think prior to this, you were frustrated and feeling like this was it and you were kind of upset that it was all there was, but maybe this loss/end led to you realizing there was more to see/do in life. I think this is true for someone, because a cover that the Lummineers did of This Must be The Place by Talking Heads came on, and it's kind of like realizing that where you are is where you're supposed to be. I know, you're probably like "But that's the opposite of what you just said"! HANG ON! I'm getting that you're realizing it's not your "home" and "home is where I want to be..." and whatever this situation is, it's not feeling like home to you. Or, at least wasn't prior to the end/separation. For some, this was a person that was cut off. Either you were the one doing the cutting or someone else did (or maybe it was someone at a job or at school that you lost contact with because of closures). Either way, you realized just how frustrating this situation was and kind of went into Hermit mode for a bit (or will) to reflect on what transpired. Gonna be honest, because you chose Inferno, I'm thinking there's a lot of anger too. Like, there aren’t necessarily any super angry characters in this movie, but the name itself makes me think of rage. I always think of rage as being this really red hot thing, a kind of inferno. So, I see anger being involved. Or, for some of you at least. I think there was a lot of clashing/competition. Maybe arguments that ended in tears on someone’s end. Whatever it was, it was/will be cut off somehow and you'll be feeling more at peace. I think you're also going to be finding that you're definitely more stable and making more progress in areas of your life you hadn't seen progress in previously. In one of the decks I'm using, the Lovely Omens deck, the Hermit card makes the hermit look like she came to some kind of a conclusion, like an “a-ha!” moment with how she has her finger pointing up. And the hermit is someone who’s looking for answers. In the Rider-Waite deck it’s this guy who’s got a lantern, looking like he’s searching for something, but in this deck it’s like we’re seeing the moment she figured whatever it was out. I didn't intentionally lay it out the way it is in the picture, but it happened to be that she's above the Fool reversed, and I guess I see this as her maybe seeing that she can make that leap, whereas before she was hesitant and frustrated that things were at such a standstill. Maybe it was that this person or situation wasn't giving her any time to really do anything else outside of it, so maybe this time alone is making her feel like she can do anything. Now, you did get the 5 of pentacles, so I do think there was/is a period where you're feeling a little worried or anxious about finances, or just about anything really. But, I definitely see the 10 of Pentacles and the Hermit more than the five of pentacles card, and I'm seeing it as you figuring out that you can make a way to be stable on your own, not really needing anyone or that situation you'd been in. You could also read this as the 5 of Pentacles being someone else feeling a little left out, but I think it's for the best for the time being during this period of your life. I see that for some, this is a permanent cut. So maybe you just don't return to this specific job, and for other's again, it's only temporary. I do see that for some, this could be a relationship (Platonic or romantic), where you feel a little left out. Like you're not getting what you give, and this is causing you to be frustrated and moody. There may be harsh words being thrown around. But, again, this is getting cut off (by you, someone else, or just by the universe), and things are going to go better. Like, the ten of pentacles is a really good card to get, so I don’t see you being so bad off. Maybe this will be painful depending on who/what it is being cut off, but know that it’s going to lead to better things. So, things may have been rocky this year, or they will get rocky, but I see you ending it on a better note than where you were before the end of the year. Songs:

For pile one, I listed the song These Days by Nico and even though it played for that pile, I really think some of you could resonate with it, so I think you should look at the lyrics or listen to it. Also, a lot of the songs had to do with communication, so Idk. Maybe think about how you’re communicating with people, or how you’re allowing people to communicate with you (if at all, or if they’re just doing it in a shitty way. Have boundaries and speak up if you don’t think people are being honest with you, but also remember to treat people how you want to be treated) also, ngl i wasn’t going to link the theme to inferno but like honestly its so weird I have to. It’s not scored by Goblin like the other two movies but I get this song stuck in my head more lol So HERE it is idk maybe someone will like it too lmao

oceans - the wombats (there’s a line about selling an ocean to the sea and I really feel like this is kind of you and this situation you cut off, like maybe it was a situation you’ve been in time and time again and you’re finally cutting it off after seeing that it’s the same thing you’ve dealt with and the only way to stop it is to cut it off this time. like idk it’s hard for me to explain but i feel like this specific part of the song is something you should check out) movement - the higher this is me trying - taylor swift lambs wool - foster the people love me to death - GARDEN

this must be the place (naive melody) - Talking Heads cover by The Lumineers (they also talk about that same line I mention in the beginning of this and I think thats kind of funny that it stands out to them too lol) Pile 3:

Cards: Seven of Wands, 8 of Pentacles, Page of Cups, 8 of Cups, Knight of Wands, five of wands reversed, Ship, moon, sun, hagalaz, perthro, eihwaz

PILE 3 I THINK SOME OF YOU ARE GOING TO GET ASKED OUT. I have a bunch of reasons for this! First of, I pulled the Page of Cups and the Knight of Wands. Along with the moon and sun cards in my fortune cards (which don't necessarily mean love, but I'll get to it!). Also, the first two songs that played, were First Date by Blink-182 and The Pull of You by the National. Granted, The Pull of You is little sad (kind of about two people drifting apart, but still being connected) and First Date being about...well a First Date, but to me those definitely are screaming romantic feelings lol. But, we'll get to that later! You guys just kept getting all the love songs that mean something to me so!!! That's something!!! Like, I mostly just felt super mushy while doing this pile and I kind of take this to mean something. Firstly, I've been talking a little bit about the movies that each pile was represented by. Deep Red is actually one of my favorite movies (did I choose this pile before I pulled the cards? MAYBE. Do I think it's gonna happen for me specifically!? I don't know! But it might for you! Take what resonates!). It's a murder mystery and scored by Goblin (who I got to see play the score live during a showing of the movie last year for my birthday so!!!!). Basically, it's about an American pianist living in Italy who witnesses the murder of a neighbor and so he teams up with a journalist to solve the murder. They make a good team, and I think this is kind of playing into what I want to get at later, but first the big part of this: I think someone has noticed you. I think they're really attracted to you. Yes, I think it's physical, but I also think they're intrigued by you, especially because I think maybe you have some walls up and they can't really get to know you (I see the moon card in my fortune deck as kind of saying this, but it also can mean attention and praise, so I see this too!). I think they're seeing you as someone who has strength and has endured the trials of life. So, with this recognition, I think they're going to rush in and tell you how they're feeling and maybe ask you out. I think it's going to be really random and I also think it's going to end up being a compromise lol. I think you're going to be playing hard to get (but maybe it's not intentional, I know I'm kind of hard to really get to know, so I see how this could happen with someone). So, I see them working hard to get you to budge, but I think eventually you're kind of like "Okay, fine, but I choose what we do and when." Whatever it is, I see that it's going to go well I think you'll both be pretty happy. There may be a period after where you withdraw a bit (or they do) and think about it, but I think you feel a pull to them (which I think is why the Pull of You came on). The 8 of cups can talk about withdrawing, but it can also talk about loosing interest, however I don't see either of you loosing interest, at least not with everything else I pulled. This 8 of cups in this deck is really specific to me. In the Rider-Waite, he's walking away from the cups, but in this one he's just sitting and looking at the moon. And maybe this isn't you, maybe this is this person studying you before they ask you out? I mean, I think it's interesting I pulled one moon card and this one and the moon is so prominent to me in this card. Honestly, I think it's both! I think this person is REALLY into you. I mean, the majority of the songs that played were like really...They were about people liking people from afar, and also Panic Switch came on by Silversun PIckups and like I don't think it NECESSARILY applies to this, but I see maybe this being kind of a weird situation for you because maybe you're not used to the attention, so they like give you this attention and praise and admit that they like you and you kind of freeze up and your walls go up. So, like you panic? But, honestly, I think maybe you like them too. Like, Despite the seven and 5 of wands showing up, I'm seeing good in this. (I like it by the Maria's came on, so I really think you like them back lol) The runes add to it too, because Perthro means hidden secrets (and I take the moon to mean that too!), but I see the Knight of Wands holding up his wand, so it's like they're offering this truth to you. It can also mean change, and I see that this will change things. And Eihwaz can mean stability, so maybe this is something that at first is scary and uncertain when it first presents itself, but then it even outs (like with those negotiations where you compromise) and it stabilizes and you're just feeling glad with how it worked out. HONESTLY, I'm just feeling super good about this? So I think this is going to make you feel good too! And for those of you that didn't want a love reading, it could just be a new friend maybe, like someone that admires you and maybe you two have a good dynamic (like one where you could solve mysteries lol). I also think that both of you are creative, but in different ways. Like one could write and the other could be more into making music or playing instruments. I mean, it could be anything and maybe you're into the same things, but I'm getting that just from the dynamic between the two main characters in Deep Red, and I definitely get a creative vibe from this. And like, maybe it's a business offer. Like, you're asked to work on a project with someone. I think this could end up well. Any of these situations I think is going to go good, so I'm really happy for you!

Songs:

Deep Red Theme (since I posted the other themes. I listen to this one a lot actually, the bass is SO GOOD) first date - blink-182 (i promise i listen to other blink songs but this one just always seems to come up for these?!) the pull of you - the national howling at the moon - phantogram panic switch - silversun pickups (okay are you guys fans of good bass or something? bc i’m seeing a theme outside of my own preference)

groceries - mallrat i like it - the marías (you guys let me let this sit for weeks without me putting the link to this song? lol guyyss tell me things!) invisible string - taylor swift (i think its crazy this one played in the same pile the pull of you played bc I relate them together for many reasons? so like !!!! that’s tarot for you!!!!)

purest form - prince of eden

LET ME KNOW IF IT RESONATES AND ALSO MAYBE COME BACK IN JANUARY TO SEE IF IT PLAYED OUT THE WAY THE CARDS TOLD ME!

#tarot #pick-a-pile #pick-a-card

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wild-battlebond · 3 years

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Appmon Ep52 Liveblog

It’s the final episode! Our Singularity! There are several definitions of the word “singularity”, but the definition that best fits the episode (and entire series) is: “a hypothetical moment in time when artifical intelligence and other technologies become so advanced that humanity undergoes a dramatic and irreversible change.”

another fancy quote. this one is from Clyde Sinclair.

Haru was falling off a building but he’s fine now because Gaiamon came and grabbed him. I actually think that this shot is really cool, how the camera dips down as Haru should hit the ground but then raises back up when Gaiamon catches him.

and everyone else’s Appmon are back, too!

and now everyone else’s Appmon are getting beat up. good thing they don’t have to worry about protecting humans anymore, because this city is getting torn to pieces.

I still don’t really get why Haru holds up his hand at Leviathan (i guess it’s supposed to be like, he’s so heroic and fearless now? i think Haru has just been running off of adrenaline ever since the antenna fiasco and isn’t putting a whole lot of thought into what he does.) but everyone calling out to their Appmon, even from such a long distance, is cool.

Minerva’s dead now, but now everyone has a cool power-up! it’s basically like a reverse version of the power-up that Leviathan threw around during the Ultimate Four arc.

this fight is super cool, and really well choreographed with all of the swooping around and the solid impacts that the hits have. and they knew it was cool, too, cause the opening plays during it.

and now after all that big talk that Leviathan’s minions had about the irrelevance of feelings and what the heart wants and how logic will always prevail, Leviathan subccumbs to the raw emotion that is the fear of death. ultimately, no matter how emotionless and logical someone pretends to be, they will always be influenced by their emotions — we wouldn’t be living things without that.

aw man, I just thought of this... wouldn’t it have been cool if part of these power-ups had been fueled by an overdrive?

Leviathan’s body is destroyed now! this isn’t the end, though, but everyone thinks it is so they enjoy a nice moment of reunion and congratulations. So everyone hugs and hi-fives and stuff, Dokamon finally gets some affection, and Rei & Hackmon are just vibing!

i was gonna say something cheeky about how Yujin starts apologizing for what he’s done, but then I realized you can actually look at this as a parallel to Offmon’s profuse apologizing for some unknown deed from earlier on — the way Yujin repeats “sorry” even sounds like how Offmon would apologize.

but things are not over because Leviathan was scared of death so now Yujin is acting as a host for Leviathan’s remains.

besides the “no more fear of death” thing, I wonder why Leviathan is so enamored with the idea of a world without suffering or sadness? perhaps choosing to break away from the rules of humanity lead Leviathan to discover the depths of human suffering? maybe, like with the “no more fear” thing, Leviathan felt a bunch of negative emotions and was like “well this sucks” and decided to get rid of them?

yep, change is a really important theme in Appmon. change for the better, change for the worse — it’s what living things do

oh yeah lol then Leviathan turns that on its head and makes Haru choose between humanity and Yujin’s life.

but, in the end, to not have selected “yes” would have been extremely selfish, not to mention unprotagonist-y. looking at it as sheer numbers, there’s more value in saving lots of people instead of just one person... and, it would result in lots of people loosing those they care about. it’s one person’s valued relationship VS the valued relationships between billions of people, so of course “yes” is the best answer... really shitty of Leviathan to make Haru make that choice, though. it’s good writing.

and now Haru knows what he’s going to do in the future (and what kind of high school he’s going to apply for) — he’ll become a AI researcher so that he can try and revive Yujin after all this. it’s been only about a day since they had that conversation, after all, so it’s still fresh in his mind.

and Yujin knows that it would be horrible to make Haru willingly give up his best friend so he wakes his consciousness up and hits the button for him. so, despite Yujin not actually changing much through the series, he does finally make good on his App Drive question — he gave up his life to protect Haru. though the wording of the question made it seem like Yujin would wind up saving him from, like, physical harm, he actually winds up protecting Haru from emotional harm.

Haru’s request to Yujin to somehow come back and be his best friend again is pretty illogical (how would he do that if he’s dead), but again I think Haru is mostly just running on raw emotion rather than any actual thought throughout this episode. which is fitting, I suppose, given the themes of emotion VS logic. plus Yujin is going to be back in like five minutes so *shrugs*

also, I think this part is sweet, how the buddy pairs try to console each other... it’s especially cute how Musimon tries to wipe away Astora’s tears

and now it’s the near future and everything is getting rebuilt!

oh, the person watching the news is Unryuji Knight. i guess he doesn’t completely dissapear after the end of his arc.

oh, they actually go over the intended definition of singularity in the episode. I totally forgot since I was focused on everything else happening in the epilogue.

I can’t escape the feeling that Astora must get grounded or something sometimes after his videos. like there’s no way he gets off scot-free for breaking pots or filling ponds full of fish with slime

at this point, the first time I watched this episode I barely paid attention to the actual happenings of the epilogue because, once I realized that no Appmon were appearing, the only thing I could think was “and the Appmon? where are the Appmon?? they didn’t leave, did they???”. so this time, since I know the Appmon are still around, I’m going to pay better attention.

I’m really curious what the dissolving of L-Corp means — was everything owned by L-Corp just shut down, or did other companies get to buy up L-Corp’s subsidiaries? because it seems really coincidental that Eri would wind up working with Elena and Alice again under a completely different idol firm, so I wonder if they’re still working for Appliyama and it just got bought out by a new company?

and Grandpa Deneimon got put back in the real world. it’s never said whether everyone winds up telling their families about the Appmon or anything, so is Deneimon just living in Ai’s basement and Haru’s mom has no idea he’s still alive??

and the Appmon are still around, much to the relief of my past self! everyone’s still close friends, too — they still hang out together in the bookstore’s basement. and, they somehow managed to pull Offmon out of the wreckage of Leviathan’s body, and now Haru is careing for him. Gatchmon never really ever got over being annoyed-jealous at Offmon all the time, so I imagine that Haru’s home life must be real experience with those two around.

andddd Yujin is alive! somehow! it’s a little cheap that he magically comes back after Haru bases his future goals around losing him — generally, if you’re really going to use a death for character development, they should stay dead. But, this is a kids’ show, so I really can’t complain too much. and, soon after watching this for the first time, I did quickly cook up a theory to explain his return — since Yujin befriending Haru was so intrigal to Leviathan’s plans, it seems like there would have been a way to revive Yujin if something happened to him so that the plan could continue. so, based on the assumption that when Yujin returns home for the day and his doorway scans his memory and makes it so his mom knows what he wants to eat also makes a backup of his memory, it’s entirely possible that his mom was also saddened by his death and decided to just revive him from a backup (which would leave him without any memory of what happened the day they caught Bootmon or anything after that), using that last complete-but-unused Yujin body that was shown a few episodes ago. that’s my headcanon for what happened, anyways.

one last Haru’s birthday for the road :’)

And that’s the end of the show! I wound up really liking Appmon when I first watched it last August, to the point where I decided to rewatch it just a few months afterwards. And, lo-and-behold, I still really like it! It’s not only a really good mon-genre show, with a lot of focus on the friendships between humans and monsters, but it’s also a really interesting look at the potential bonds of people and technology. So, I’m really glad to have watched it again while doing liveblogs — and I’m proud of these liveblogs, too, since I wound up going way into depth on my thoughts and theories and headcanons for the show, so it was really fun! I’m also glad that other people have enjoyed reading these, too — ultimately, I do this just because I enjoy it, but it’s nice to know other people like it too. So, thanks for reading! And, also, if anyone wants to hear more of my thoughts on this stuff... I’m open to discuss the show at any time as well!

#didn’t know singularity could mean that so i’m glad i looked it up #fiftytenlive #digimon #appmon #appmon spoilers #APM52

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theliterarywolf · 4 years

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2019′s Animation Hidden Gems

So, another year has come and gone. And, in regards to animated content, we had a sizable smorgasboard of offerings both on the mainstream end and the Indie scene.

I figured I would go over some of the ones that caught my eye that I don’t see many people talking about or, if they are talking about them, they’re focusing on shitty e-drama rather than the content in of itself.

So, let’s begin!

... Just going to use a ‘Read More’ break due to the length of this post as well as spoilers for certain things within.

Tuca and Bertie

So, we’re just going to acknowledge the fact that Netflix’s cancellation of this show before it even had the chance to hit its stride (which coincidentally timed in with the team behind it, the same team behind Bojack Horseman, getting the rights to unionize -- but I’m sure that’s just a coincidence~) was one of the shittiest things they did this year, right? Right.

Anyway, Tuca and Bertie was one of those shows that, while it took me a good few days to finally watch it (due mostly to Netflix burying this show underneath those damn Ted Bundy movies and that fucking Beyonce concert/documentary/what-the-fuck-ever), was definitely a front-runner for adult-centered animation this year.

While the wacky animation styles can sometimes throw initial viewers off, by the time the series is halfway through you’re fully engrossed in how it helps to tell the stories this show wants to focus on.

While, yes, the show was a little heavy-handed in one of the early episodes about women in the workplace (that whole scene of Tuca screaming obnoxiously in the board-meeting to signal that no woman had spoken in 30 minutes was kind of grating even though the message is sound), the series as a whole is a great change of pace in regards to having adult animation centered on/aimed towards women. The characters work great together, the sound design works wonders, and Netflix cancelling this show despite they themselves not promoting it is such a damn crime.

My personal favorite part/episode: While the episode “The Jelly Lakes” was a great, poignant display of showing Bertie opening up about her past trauma and sexual abuse, the episode that I always resonate with during rewatches of this series is “Plumage”. The way that it tackles not only reconciling with addiction but emotional/psychological abuse and how it often comes from sources that are on the outside beneficial hits so close to home. The fact that it was handled with tact and respect while still being in this wacky world of talking bird-people was amazing.

Sound and Fury

I... am just going to come out and admit it, my brain still hasn’t 100% wrapped around the ‘what does it MEAN?!?!’ aspect of this animated album but, damn it all, is it a feast for the ears and eyes.

I honestly can’t talk about it too much because half the enjoyment comes from watching it for yourself.

My personal favorite part/episode: I can’t quite remember what the song’s name was, but visually it was the section that focused on the homeless veteran basically being left outside to die while the city is about to be decimated by a nuclear bomb. The fact that the segment shows everything, right down to how the cat he tries to rescue agonizingly burns to death when the bomb hits, has stuck with me.

Love, Death + Robots

Well, you guys didn’t think I was going to let 2019 pass without me gushing about one of my favorite animation anthologies of the year, did you?

Seriously, I am so glad that Netflix has greenlit a second volume for this project because it really is the type of stuff I like to see: collections of vastly different stories using different mediums and styles.

While two of the entries aren’t as strong as the others (”The Witness” and “Ice Age” freaking suck, don’t @ me), the bulk of the anthology is immensely strong and well-executed and no amount of people whinging about ‘myeh, it’s too sex-filled and violent~’ is going to ruin that.

My personal favorite part/episode: The segment “Suits” still takes my award for best in show, but I still like the series potential of “Shapeshifters” and the attempt at cosmic horror in “Beyond the Aquila Rift”.

Satellite City

I hate, hate, HATE that my initial exposure to Sam Fennah’s creative world, much like other people’s first exposure, was via that DAMN Nostalgia Critic review for The Wall!

But, in all seriousness, Fennah’s web-series as well as the book that he’s been working on are so excellently crafted.

The character design: I’ve gushed so much about the character design that doing so again here would be a crime. But it really is wonderful seeing monster designs that think ‘monstrous’ first and ‘marketability’ second.

The voice acting: everyone in here does an exceptional job with their performances and giving life to not only the characters but the world surrounding them. Seriously, they’re all amazing and I can only hope that their talents are showcased in other projects.

The animation: the fact that it’s all done and rigged by one person is awe-inspiring enough but the way that Fennah works to make sure that the characters don’t stick out too much from their real-world sets is incredible.

The writing: It would be so easy for a series like this to stick to wacky hijinks, violence, and toilet-humor, but no. We have excellently crafted, mature dialogue, we have incorporated world-building that doesn’t rely on exposition dumps, we have diction that rivals some of the commercial hyper-hits of the current year.

Seriously, I wish that more people watched this series; it’s so good..!

My personal favorite part/episode: This relies on some spoilers, but I have to talk about what I think the highlight of the series. While the episode “Slice of Life” gives a good display of the core cast in a day-to-day setting with Lucy Lacemaker giving an incredible monologue about the nature of life and immortality at the end, no where else does the work behind the craft of Satellite City shine more...

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Than in Episode 20 - “The Order of Things”. Satellite City centers around the Kivouachians, a species of unworldly creatures who have been around for billions of years but, due to war and betrayal, lost their homeland and have been scattered across the Earth.

During this war, many died, many were punished, many were tortured, and many were left to deal with horrific trauma and PTSD.

While this episode has the connecting tissue of informing others that the series’ antagonist has escaped her prison, it also centers upon the heavy issue of destructive, toxic relationships and how people can let themselves waste away and decay just because they can’t find it in themselves to let go of something that may ‘make them happy’.

We also get a dialogue from Lucy Lacemaker about the nature of art and imitation, but it’s simply the cherry on top of the sundae that the prior themes build up.

... Seriously, j-just go watch the show; put has-been critics out of your minds and just go appreciate this series for what it is.

Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss/Holidaze

God, I can only be in awe of and respect Vivienne for getting to the point that she has gotten to. Two well-received animated pilots, an adorable holiday special, industry ties, and a portfolio that surely can fill two phone books at this point.

Seriously, though, Hazbin Hotel is great: an adult animated show with an interesting art style, engaging characters, and a world that I really want to see more of.

Helluva Boss is great too! That show has a more intimate cast and less insanity so if the barrage of visuals in the prior turned you off, then the latter would probably be more your cup of tea.

Finally, Holidaze is fucking adorable. It boggles my mind that people were getting upset at this special for coming out and doing something different when most complaints against HH and HB were ‘ugh, she really can’t do anything aside from “offensive people in hell are offensive because HELL, lol”’. Well, here you go! Something wholesome and cute and heartwarming!

Some people just want to bitch and moan, I swear...

My personal favorite part/episode: See, here’s where it gets tricky. I love the feeling I get from Holidaze. I love the characters from Hazbin Hotel. I love the setting/premise of Helluva Boss.

But I wouldn’t want all of those things crammed together.

So, all in all, VivziePop and her colleagues have done an amazing job with these shorts and I can’t wait to see what 2020 has in store for them.

Dororo (2019)

Look, man! I get it, okay?! When it comes to anime where the main character in a feudal-era Japan setting goes around killing demons, everyone and their grandma was gushing over Demon Slayer.

And, you know what? Demon Slayer is a good show; it has really good animation and Nezuko is best girl.

... But fuck ALL OF YOU who slept on Dororo (2019), man! I get it, Amazon having the streaming rights to it made it all sorts of awful to try and keep up with, but even so this show was way too ignored by people.

Which is a damn shame because in regards to revamping classic anime IPs, this is right up there in ‘damn, they actually did a good job’ along with Casshern Sins and Devilman Crybaby.

My personal favorite part/episode:

... Have I mentioned that the theme song for this show is an absolute BANGER?!

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That’s all I have for now. I still have yet to watch things like Klaus and I Lost My Body, and I was unfortunately unable to watch Promare due to not having the funds for it when it was in theaters, and -- Oh my fucking GOD, I’m just now finding out that Netflix has Hey Arnold! The Jungle Movie after trying to find a way to legally watch it for ages.

But I hope that I was able to introduce some of you to some animated pieces that got a little overshadowed this year.

Here’s hoping for more amazing stuff to grace our eyes in 2020!

#animation #art #cartoons #anime #web series #film

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hippyexd · 4 years

Text

Collection of my stories: Explained

Here is the post that nobody cares about but I'll share it because I just want the world to know.

1. Demon Academy.

I've posted some things about it already, it's a comic I started in 2014 originally in hungarian. I'm not quite happy with the way I started it, but I've built an interesting world, and I adore the characters, it's one of my best work that I'm very proud of. I drew 260 pages in total (book 1 and book 2) and I intend to pick up the story again sometime soon, when I get over exam season.

2. Runner

A medieval-themed fantasy story that I eventually want to make into a cartoon series. It's a bit cliché, but the characters are fun, and it has a lot of potential for epic music. I basically came up with the entire plot while listening to fantasy music mixes. Fun times. I've only got some character drawigs, and I just recently managed to finally have eneryone's finalized version. I also have a side story/shared universe thing planned for it.

3. Xyber-no

A post-apocalyptic cyberpunk futuristic action horror cartoon series idea. I've got the characters done already, and plans for like 2 seasons worth of content, I'm just lazy to edit the 1st ep's script. It's not even 20 minutes long. Honestly I'm just anxious to touch it. Got most of my ideas while listening to Neffex songs.

4. Racer

I watched Initial-D, and way back I had a roleplay about a car racer dude, and these two motivated me to write this story. It's not really a novel, it resembles more to a script but it's not actually a script. It was mainly dialogue practice, to make the characters feel more fun. I just finished the rewrite like a week ago, I think it turned out pretty great. Planning on adding a part 2 or a season 2 or something like that, but again, too lazy to actually touch it. It's fun to re-read though.

5. Singer

I'm currently working on this story, because when I'm bored, I write. And when is the best time to be bored? Exam season. Hell yeah. Anyway, it's about a suicidal dude falling in love with a singer (also dude, I love my gay kids okay) and then they figure out their shit. Good story to fit in as much angst as possible, with a few lovely fluff parts.

6. ZR series

Most of my followers came from the ZR community, so y'all know what this one is. But in case not, it's a comic series portraying my reactions to various moments that happen in Zombies, Run!, a really fun and creative workout app. The comic is on hold right now because I've already got too much shit to do til christmas. (Such as the Fellow Five drawing I promised. It's not forgotten, I just don't have time!! XD)

7. Demon and Vampire

Basically an over the top gay fluff love story with a little angst. It's pretty cool, sometimes it's boring, it's full of clichés and stuff, but I read it like 6 times and usually I hate my own writing, but there are parts that I just genuinely love in it. Fun stuff.

8. Psychoville

I've written the first 10 pages in like 30 different versions, because I'm unable to nail it. The main character is the daughter of Satan, who's name is ironically Angel, and she lives in a small town called Psychoville in the desert in Nevada, next to Searchlight, Nevada. As the name implies, she lives with 9 (or 8, I forgot) psychopaths, killers, mass murderers, insane mentally ill people who love each other to bits (and sometimes cut each other to bits) until she gets the task to investigate something for her father away from her home. Got a lot of inspiration from Welcome to Night Vale, and that lawless town in Kansas, I think? The yes theory made a video on it on yt, it's pretty dope.

9. Hollywood Undead Hungarian Fanfiction

It's just what it is. A fanfic of the boiz going on tour, getting in trouble, drinking and so on. No romance (bc that's gross and I couldn't find any fanfic that was not in some shape or form a ship fanfic). Da Kurlzz was still in the band when I wrote it. I was like 12. I just wanted to have fun. The chapters are 2 pages long in total. But the hungarian fans liked it, was trending a bunch of times on wattpad and it has a lot of reads. Despite being horribly shitty, I'm proud of it, and it has a lot of really fun parts and jokes.

10. Wrong Number

I almost forgot about this gem, but this was my first finished english story. It's almost entirely written in sms text format, it's progressig a bit too quickly, but at the time I was having a lot of fun with it, and that's all that matters. It has some really funny lines I came up with, I like re-reading it just for that. But also, it was a fun way to get around having to write long paragraphs lol. I just wanted to have fun with it. Heavily inspired by the Call me Beep me klance fanfic.

11. Milky Boiz

Context: my friend and I, at 2am, were thinking about what our ship name would be, but I kept typing "mmmmmilky" in the chat, that turned into milky boiz, and she said, that if we were guys, that would be our ship name. This gave us an idea for a webcomic, which we didn't actually progress with yet, but we do have an insta page where we already posted some of our boiz, you can find it under the name of @ink.stars , go pay a visit, it's my art and my friend's, and she is a wonderful artist and a lovely person and I love her to bits.

12. Night Vale Steampunk AU

It's pretty much dead, but while I was really actively part of the Night Vale fandom, I started a Steampunk AU. It was fun, it got like 4 chapters or something and big plans, but the characters were not in character, and it lost the Night Vale vibe, so I just let it go.

13. Cop Comic

Also a dead project of mine, but I still like it. It was inspired by a moment on one of our high school class trips. The characters were based on me and my friends, but the resemblence stops at hair color, that's all. Mabye not even that. Anyway it's what it is: cops dealing with crime and their personal problems. I wish I had known Brooklyn Nine Nine back then, would have been a great help.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

So, there you have it, all my favourite finished and unfinished works/ideas, just so you know if in the future I reference one (planning to post more Runner, DA and Xyber-no content along with the ZR comic)

#character #zombies run #original story #original comic #comic #story #novel #plans #original #my story #collection #demon academy #demon #explain #explained

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honeylikewords · 4 years

Note

Talk to me about tros!!!! I need to know about Poe!!

Okay, I’m finally sitting down to answer this anon, and a few things before I start!

1. Most of what I’m going to say will really only make sense if you go see The Rise of Skywalker yourself. While it’s far from a perfect movie, it’d take way too long for me to try and transcribe everything that happens in the film, and the context and nuance of certain scenes. So, yeah, while it’s not a good movie, if you’re invested in seeing how the movies have played out, you should probably go see it yourself.

2. I have some... mixed feelings about the movie. I also know that what I don’t like, I can choose to ignore; despite the disappointments of the series, I don’t have to take Rian or JJ’s bullshit as MY canon. I get to decide what I do and don’t adhere to as canon. Everyone else has their own varying scales of how they respond to canon-- some are super adherent to canon, some don’t care about anything at all-- and that’s fine. So although I have beef with how all this unfolded, I also know that I can take my love that I have for the characters (and all the potential that The Force Awakens had) and carry that on through my own interpretations, re-writes, et cetera, and I can choose to ignore the poor decisionmaking on the parts of Disney and Rian/JJ/who-the-fuck-ever.

3. This ask is very open-ended, so I’m going to have to put some parameters down for myself because otherwise I’d get too overwhelmed with the breadth of information I’d need to present about TRoS. A comprehensive review would be really hard to write out, so I’ll just list some initial impressions (I haven’t been able to see it a second time, but likely will in the near future), and some of the relevant Poe-related issues in the films. If you wanna know more, feel free to send in more specific questions (specificity can help, because with my neurotype, I can easily be overwhelmed by large, “general” questions, and getting more granular can help me rein in and focus on a specific idea)!

4. Also, this post isn’t going to be friendly to R*ylo or people who straightwash Poe/are only interested in him as a straight guy. R*ylo is fucking gross, and I’m gonna rip it apart in this post, and Poe isn’t straight. I try not to be too aggressive on here (I’m generally not very aggressive at all!), but the fandom is just so toxic and vile at times that I feel like I need to put my foot down on these topics and say a firm “no” to R*ylos and Poe straightwashers. Oh, and I’ll be talking about the racism in the movie, as well as in the fandom, so buckle up for that, too. So consider this the “bigots begone!” spell as I wave my wand and attempt to shoo them all away!

Anyway...

From here down are spoilers for Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker. If you’re interested in seeing the movie spoiler-free, please scoot waaaaay past this post! Last warning!

And, with that out of the way, here we go!

Alright, here’s a list of stuff as it occurs to me. I’m almost overwhelmed with information, so it’s hard to condense my thoughts, but I’ll try my best!

1. The whole Zorri thing was a fucking nightmare, but not as bad as it could have been. It was really bad, believe me, but, like, it can be ignored easily (though if you’re anything like me, it’ll still leave a sour taste in your mouth). Like I predicted, Zorri was introduced to straightwash Poe and effectively quash any queer interpretations of his character and relationship with Finn.

But, like, Poe and Zorri had no chemistry. It was almost embarrassing; they were clearly trying to work the “badass woman” angle, but, eh, she was just, basically, a minor blip on the radar; incredibly boring, incredibly useless, and just, like, a “sexy lamp” that could easily have been replaced. She added literally nothing to the film and was blatantly just an insert to try and prevent people from being able to make the case for a queer Poe. But, too bad, Disney! Poe is pansexual, dumbasses!

Oh, and while I’m on the topic of Poe’s queerness, I should add that I’m not really a big FinnPoe, myself; when it got big after the release of The Force Awakens, if felt like just another creepy Tumblr fetishization of male relationships, so that really set the tone for how I’d see it in the coming years. It’s grievously oversexualized on this site, but I also respect that, for many actually queer fans, the ship represents seeing themselves in Star Wars, and I do totally see their bond as canon. I completely acknowledge that Oscar wanted to represent the queer fans who wanted his character to be queer, and in that way, FinnPoe is definitely canon in some form!

So, I do have a complex relationship with FinnPoe, in that it’s not my personal favorite ship (I vastly prefer FinnRey, since I never really felt that Finn and Poe had a romantic tension, but felt that Finn and Rey did), but I do respect the importance of it for queer fans and for trying to push at the limitations a major series like Star Wars has had for so long. Star Wars has been dominated as a straight, cishet, white man’s fandom; it’s time other people got a chance to love it and see themselves in this vast universe, too.

The cast also seems to be leaning into FinnPoe as a form of protest against censorship and homophobia in the fandoms and film world. They’re using their positions as major film stars to push back and say “hey, queer folks belong here, too”, and that’s so great!

But, anyway, the point is, Zorri sucked, and Poe’s not straight. He’s certainly capable of being attracted to women, but he’s not a straight dude, because he’s equally capable of being attracted to men and nonbinary people as well.

Thankfully, Zorri and Poe never actually form a relationship in TRoS. He jokes about asking for a kiss, she tells him to go, and then he, at the end, sort of motions his head as if to say “wanna go kiss?” and she, again, tells him no, which he shrugs off. It’s pretty shitty, but easy to ignore.

Anyway, Poe is pan, Finn is pan, Lando is pan, Luke Skywalker is gay and nonbinary, Rey is nonbinary and probably ace, maybe interested in girls, I’m still ironing my hcs for her out, and no one can stop me! Go ahead and try to kill me, Disney (and homophobic Star Wars fans); if you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine!

2. Poe’s “backstory” is such a fucking trainwreck. They basically tried to nix a bunch of what was already canonically established in order to, get this, make Poe a drug dealer.

It’s a little more complex-- the idea is that Poe was a pilot for a group of pirates for about six years, from the age of 16 until he was 22-ish, and ran Spice, the drug in Star Wars-- but it’s also not. It’s really bad.

Way to take a canonically noble, hardworking, Latino character and reduce him to the most shitty, racist stereotype imaginable. I’ve already complained about him not needing a “dark” past, but this? This is somehow worse than him being, like, a bounty hunter, because it carries political implications and is just such a stock, trash stereotype that we don’t need in this world or in our fantasies. It’s ridiculous, and I refuse to acknowledge it.

Worse yet, it’s said that Poe “ran away from home” to join the pirates to “avoid responsibility” at age 16... dude, Poe has been shown in EVERY PRIOR CANONICAL APPEARANCE TO CRAVE NOTHING BUT RESPONSIBILITY. Yes, he’s a hothead, but he’s responsible! He wants to labor and take on caring for others because he’s a hardworking, compassionate, headstrong man! Ugh!

I could go off forever about this, but I’m already feeling myself grinding my teeth, and for the sake of my blood pressure and psychological wellbeing I’m not going to make myself go feral over it right now. Deep breaths, K, deep breaths...

3. In things I did like: Poe got promoted to general, and he made Finn a general alongside him. He really grew into his position, and I’m so proud to see him as General Dameron of the Resistance. He deserves it.

4. Poe and Finn had SO many good scenes and such great chemistry. I loved seeing them bounce off each other, and their relationship made me laugh and smile and feel warm, even as everything else was falling apart. I love my boys!

5. Poe gets grossed out by bones. Canon. Love a squeamish king.

6. Oh, ugh, I just remembered that they tried to frame Poe and Rey as having an aggressive relationship with each other and I rolled my eyes. How dumb can they be? Ugh. I don’t even have the energy to try and unpack how ridiculous all that is. More deep breaths...

7. In terms of the worst thing to happen in the movie... R*ylo, like, gets shoehorned in. Honestly, looking back at all the predictions I made a few months back, I’m entirely right; everything I predicted came to pass. This included.

It was shitty and bad and nearly all the cast has spoken out against it now that their contracts with Disney aren’t as binding, and seeing it happen on the big screen was just... oh my god, it was horrifying.

It really was.

But thankfully, Kylo died, so the ship can’t really continue! Yeehaw!

8. I actually did like parts of the ending. I’ll talk about that more if anyone asks more specific questions, but right now, I’m kinda burning out because of the wide net this ask casts, so I’ll have to defer for the moment.

At any rate, it all happened exactly the way I thought it would, bleh. Like, so much shit in the movie went down exactly the way my TRoS predictions post said, it’s almost scary.

Honestly, though, just running through all this is exhausting me; I really can’t make myself go through it all in this particular format. So, I’ll just leave this here as it is, and if anyone has any specific questions-- what I thought of specific moments, characters, scenes, etc-- send an ask! But this is all just really wide and general and burning my brain out to try and process it all again, so more specificity in future asks might help me stay more on track and not get overwhelmed trying to explain every single thing all at once.

I have tons and tons of thoughts about it, ranging from what I loved to what I’d have done different about the whole series, but I just don’t have the psychological wherewithal to make myself write everything out in one giant, dense, indecipherable post: it’s just all too much, so I’d need to break it down into smaller, more specific questions.

This probably isn’t a super-satisfying answer, but feel free to just send specific asks and I’ll answer them, no matter how many! It just helps to have a specific line of thought to follow, so feel free to ask about each individual thing and I’ll try to answer!

Thanks!

#messages #anonymous #gif warning #rise of skywalker spoilers #star wars spoilers #the rise of skywalker spoilers #ros spoilers #tros spoilers #spoilers #sorry i kinda burned out midway through this but i could feel myself getting a tension headache just listing off all the shit i hated and li #like there IS stuff i liked about the movie there's also just so much nonsense garbage that happened and i just. im just #i need more specific questions to help me limit myself from ranting about EVERYTHING and going nowhere #so if you want to know more PLEASE send some asks about specific things #(it's just for the sake of my brain health and helping me stay focused aaa)

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dcarevu · 5 years

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Batman TAS: Robin’s Reckoning (Part 2)

“There’s roaches in here! Roaches!”

Episode: 33 Robin: Yes Writer: Randy Rogel Director: Dick Sebast Animator: Dong Yang Airdate: February 14, 1993 Grade: C

You just can’t do this to me, episode, you can’t do this to me. Give me a great episode like part 1, and then take that, and throw it. Not, like, out the window or anything, but just a couple feet. Enough to damage it a little. Robin’s Reckoning went from an absolute classic, to just okay, all things considered. This story and this show have so much more potential than that, and I partially blame some episodes like this on the massively long library of Batman TAS season one. The crew must have been stretched to their absolute limit, and if less episodes were required by Fox, then some of the lesser ideas likely would have been thrown out. And also there’d be more time to refine episodes like Robin’s Reckoning.

I think this episode faces two main problems. The first one being the animation. The stuff at the very end during the climax was okay, when Robin snatched up Zucco in his fists and dragged him across the dock while on a motorcycle.

Other than that, I would have assumed that this was Akom’s work. Like, their lesser-tier crew. It was pretty shitty going from Spectrum to this, and Char and I both noticed the immediate down-grade. The recap of part 1 at the beginning makes it worse because it’s showing us footage of it as if to say, “Remember this? Well, here’s what Dong Yang crafted for this one…”

The studio usually does on-par work, though, and the episode list for this season was long. I forgive them. One bad-looking one out of the bunch isn’t the end of the world, even though we rarely facer problems like this today. I’m not sure which scene was rendered worse, though. The one where Dick Grayson is hunting down Zucco as a child, or the one where Zucco is freaking out about Batman being in the damn ceiling. Each’s most compelling argument or being the worst shot is Dick Grayson falling into the river, and Tony Zucco’s awful face. I caught on that he’s older now, and all of the stress of avoiding Batman for so long has aged him further. Yeah, that’s not how you draw that. He kinda reminds me of a melting plastic-figurine.

When Dick falls into the river, it looks sooo bad (even the story-boarding seems lousy), but we get a nice-looking shot of Batman’s old costume, which was hard to spot before. I really like the design, minus the gloves. I think Bruce Time liked the design too…

The episode’s second problem was that the emotional impact of the first half was not present. Yeah, we get a nice scene of Bruce and Dick at the beginning when they are fencing (I hope that’s the correct vocabulary), but then it’s kinda just Dick on his own, dressed unrecognizably, talking to people we don’t know, and walking around the city in silence. The moment where Batman showed Robin the Batcave could count, but it seemed to go by so quickly without much of a response from Dick. Shockingly, though, I think that Dick Grayson rescued a prostitute at one point. Char and I both realized that immediately. So I hope we’re on the mark, because if she’s not a prostitute I’m going to feel really stupid. Fox censors so many things, but not that? Huh. Interesting algorithm you guys got there. Anyway, even as the episode progresses and we see Robin and Batman together, it’s not any better except for Batman’s final speech. “It wasn’t that, Robin. It wasn’t that at all. Zucco’s taken so much. Caused you so much pain. I couldn’t stand the thought that he might take you too.” Isn’t that absolutely beautiful? It’s enough to get you teary-eyed, honestly. This whole time we totally believe that Batman is just trying to parent an adult-aged Robin, but no. He was afraid for his adopted son. And that’s what Robin is. Even if they both may not act like it. The other emotional bits went by way too fast. Robin went from zero to one hundred way too quickly. So when he starts leering and sneering at Zucco, it’s not believable. “Okay, Loren Lester, act super angsty and evil! Ready?” And then he gave that performance. “So was that bad enough to be worth fixing? We are running behind. I think we should just use it.” And just as quickly as Robin’s voice changes, he comes back down that fast. Robin is furious. They’ve found the guy who murdered his parents. And Batman won’t even let Robin at him. He finally has the guy, hanging him over a dock, where at least a handicap is waiting, if not a full-on death. Then all of a sudden, “Batman, I… I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry.” Getting to this point eventually would have been good. I just needed another minute or two in length to make it work in my head. Robin’s temper and possible slight-resentment to Batman are basically brought up for the first time in this episode, by the way. And as a lot of us know, this will be a plot-point that will grow the more we watch. I’ve gotta say, after watching Christmas With the Joker, I bet a lot of people didn’t expect Robin to have this side to him. Did you? Oh. You say you did? Okay. Is it fun being a liar?

That’s Dick.

Recently I talked about Robin’s first appearance in the Batman Adventures comic book, and I like the side of Robin that it and Robin’s Reckoning present. Robin is so human in this series. For the most part, he’s not as exaggerated as Batman. He has a dark-side and a bit of a temper, but he also has moments where he lives as a fun-lovin', ordinary, college-student. We’ve seen him goofy, we’ve seen him afraid, we’ve seen him serious, and we’ve seen him furious. And yet, we don’t really know what he does for fun. What he watches on TV (aside from It’s a Wonderful Life), what his secret-obsession is. We instead know about how his emotions function. We learn about what kinds of decisions he might make, or how he may react. It’s knowing a character beyond the surface-level, and that’s how you know your character is strong. Robin may have been a challenge to do right for the crew, but the DCAU-originals decided to work with what they had based on tradition, and mix in some of their own influence only to further improve. Loren Lester’s voice is also iconic as Dick. Although all of this makes me wonder why some people think that Teen Titans is in the DCAU. They’re both Dick Grayson, but they are certainly not the same universe’s Dick Grayson. It’s clear as day to me. While I haven’t seen Teen Titans that much, Loren Lester’s Robin is iconic to me. As iconic as Kevin Conroy is to Batman. Well, almost.

A couple more episodes, and we will be closing the split timeline! A bit ago I got behind on episodes, so I “split the timeline” and covered current episodes along with episodes I was behind on. But after, these next few, all of the posts will be coming out complete in-order again. Hallelujah.

Char’s grade: C Next time: The Laughing Fish

Full episode list here!

#Batman #dcau #dc animated universe #batman tas #batman the animated series #timmverse #bruce timm #robin's reckoning #robin #tony zucco #dick grayson #btas

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jellybeanbeing · 5 years

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Queen of Air and Darkness by Cassandra Clare

WARNING: It’s gon’ be long.

Synopsis:

What if damnation is the price of true love?

Innocent blood has been spilled on the steps of the Council Hall, the sacred stronghold of the Shadowhunters. In the wake of the tragic death of Livia Blackthorn, the Clave teeters on the brink of civil war. One fragment of the Blackthorn family flees to Los Angeles, seeking to discover the source of the blight that is destroying the race of warlocks.

Meanwhile, Julian and Emma take desperate measures to put their forbidden love aside and undertake a perilous mission to Faerie to retrieve the Black Volume of the Dead. What they find in the Courts is a secret that may tear the Shadow World asunder and open a dark path into a future they could never have imagined. Caught in a race against time, Emma and Julian must save the world of Shadowhunters before the deadly power of the parabatai curse destroys them and everyone they love.

REVIEW WITH SPOILERS!

Queen of Air and Darkness was INTENSE. My goodness... There was so much stuff that happened and were packed into this book. It was amazing and so well done with some exceptions but I’ll get into it later on. Overall, it was so emotional, dynamic, and great! And since this book was so big, I’m gonna try to go over every storyline(?) or significant character.

Starting off with Ty/Kit/Dru. I knew that some necromancy was gonna happen and I was prepared for it, BUT I thought that Livvy’s ghost was gonna pop up and say “stop it” and then everything would go back. Apparently, that’s not what happens. Ty now has to face his consequences which I’m pretty sure we’re going to see in The Wicked Powers. I wasn’t so invested in their story line, mostly because it didn’t have a big relation with the bigger story line. I felt like it was all set up for Kit and Ty’s story. I did really enjoy it though. We get to see more layers of Kit and Ty, and even Dru. I really loved getting to know Dru more. She has such a great voice and seeing things from her perspective was so interesting. I’m really excited to get more from her because what we did get from her in QOAAD, I really liked. She’s so smart, strong, and has a lot of potential to grown and be an even more amazing character.

I am loving Kit even more as we get to know him and the complexity of his character. I can understand his decision at the end when he wants to leave with Tessa and Jem without saying goodbye to the Blackthorns (especially Ty). Since Livvy’s death, all Kit did was be there for Ty even if what he was doing was really wrong. But when they both were at Lake Lyn and Livvy’s ghost came up, Ty was saying how there was nothing for him if Livvy wasn’t there, and that hurt Kit. So I can understand Kit’s decision. On another note though, KIT IS THE DESCENDANT OF THE FIRST HEIR? And that scene where he and Emma are with the Riders and magic just bursts out of him? How did that even happen? I need to know what is up with that. Again, on another note, I am always loving how Kit is accepting the fact that he’s a Shadowhunter. I love a good character development, and Kit’s development is so good. When he has that conversation with Jace, Kit wants his own weapon of choice and it was such a precious scene. We can really see Kit’s growing love of being a Shadowhunter.

We didn’t get a Ty perspective AT ALL in QOAAD so I’m really thinking Cassandra Clare is saving his voice for TWP which I’m all for. We’ll get to hear his voice and it’ll be so great. Ty was really something in this book though. I was lowkey kind of getting Julian-ish vibes from him. Ty was so determined to fix himself and his family that he completely forgot the logistics of everything and tried to do the almost impossible. We saw that Blackthorn stubbornness in him and I wasn’t all about it. I JUST NEED HIS PERSPECTIVE because when he got that letter from Thule Livvy, it seemed like he didn’t care. Not even a tiny bit. I just... I need TWP now. On a side note, holy mole. What if the Thule Jace coming to the normal Shadowhunter world is the consequence for Ty trying to raise Livvy? The necromancy could’ve opened a portal and let them pass through. Oh shit. DAMN IT. That means Ty will have to face this consequence and there’s gonna be another war. Are you kidding me?

I want to explore the Scholomance more. With just the small scenes we get of it, it seems so interesting. They weren’t happy or jolly scenes but something about it makes me want to delve in the Centurions lives more. I’m hoping that in The Wicked Powers, we will get to see more of the Scholomance. Especially since Ty is going to become a Centurion which WOW. I can’t wait for it.

Moving onto Diana/Jia. Seeing things from their perspectives was pretty interesting considering that they are really the only adults here besides the TMI gang. We really saw the politics during their parts and it was unsettling because of the parallels it had with our real world politics. That was one thing that scared me. We know how things have gone in the real world when hateful people and extremists have power and influence. With those parallels, we can kind of grasp at how high the stakes are within the Shadowhunter government. There was that scene where Diego, Divya, and Rayan are brought upon the council and have the runes of Quietude put on them so they can’t speak. This hit me hard and made me tear up because it was so real. They, who are still basically children, aren’t given the chance to speak for themselves and are imprisoned. It was so heartbreaking to read that scene. But overall, I didn’t really care for Diana/Jia’s story line because nothing really happened.

There was that one badass scene where Diana was talking to Horace and he’s trying to convince her to side with him. I was so nervous that Diana wouldn’t have a way out of it and when she agreed to it, I was like, WE ARE FUCKED. But no. Diana grabs Horace’s sword, chops his arm off, and busts out the window like a BADASS. I was livid.

And then the hot faerie threesome aka Cristina/Mark/Kieran. This was a pretty wild one. I absolutely loved the character development with every one of them. Not really Cristina because her character arc wasn’t that big or different. Mark and Kieran have come so far from being these broken faerie warriors to these strong and amazing people. It makes my heart ache and feel so happy. Oh my gosh, that last scene with the three of them at Magnus and Alec’s wedding, killed me. There’s that recurring line “Remember that none of it is real.” and at the end, Mark says, “Remember that all of this is real.” RIGHT IN THE FEELS.

I need to know more about the relationship between the Rosales family and faeries. There are so many unanswered questions with this. Why does Cristina have that time medallion thingy and the Rosales have the Eternidad? And I’m pretty sure there’s something sketchy about all of that. I need answers...

Speaking of the Rosales, Diego and Jaime? I actually really liked them in this book. I was pissed at Diego for lying to Cristina but he kind of redeemed his character. He showed his compassion and kindness which I really liked, and he apologized to Cristina. He confronted the situation and knew what he did was really shitty. Side note: I really ship him with Divya and I’m hoping to see them both in TWP at the Scholomance with Ty. ALSO, Diego was asked to take the spot as Inquisitor????? Would’ve never thought of Diego as the Inquisitor but I’m not mad. Yay, Diego. Jaime literally didn’t have a huge role in here and I felt like he was just there to set up TWP story line. For a second when Diego and Jaime were in the cell together, I thought that Jaime was going to die. I think it would’ve added so much more drama if he did die and given them something to hold against the Cohort but it’s okay. Jaime lived so yay.

Really quick before we get into Emma and Julian’s part, Aline was probably one of my top favorite characters in QOAAD. She was so sassy and always stood up for Helen. She was also so understanding and logical. Aline is quick to catch onto things and I’m hoping we get to see more or Helen and Aline and their POSSIBLE BABY.

Now let’s get to Emma and Julian. I was kind of disappointed in their characters, not gonna lie. I was really liking them in the beginning but towards the end, I was beginning to not really care if they lived or not. It just makes me sad because they’re the main characters. But if I’m gonna be REAL HONEST here, I didn’t really care for anyone’s story line. This pains me to say SO MUCH because this is my favorite series in the entire Shadowhunter Chronicles.

Anyways, back to Emma and Julian. I was really liking borderline evil Julian. He was really living up to his ruthless title and it was so interesting. I seriously thought that his character would just continue to go downhill and no one was going to or could save him from it. That scene where Emma and Julian find out that Dane Larkspear was following them and then Julian MURDERS HIM sent chills down my spine. Julian was so cold and heartless in that moment and I kind of liked it. Also, call me heartless too but Dane deserved it. When he decided to go fetch the Black Volume by himself, he was asking to be killed. Back to Julian, though I liked borderline evil and emotionless Julian, he was such an asshole. Not only did he lie to and hurt Emma, he also did the same thing to his siblings. What the fudge nuggets, Julian? I was so glad that Magnus took that spell off of him because I was low key getting irritated. BUT that spell should have never been put on him in the first place, just saying.

I still think Emma is such a great strong female lead character. As I said in my Lady Midnight review, she is strong both mentally and physically but she has emotions. She expresses those emotions and shows her vulnerabilities. She ain’t no stone cold badass who welds a sword around, threatening people all the time. She’s a cool badass and I love it. One thing I really liked was how when Emma and Julian are in Thule and Julian tells Emma that he can feel again, she doesn’t just jump at the chance to be with Julian. He hurt her and lied to her, and she ain’t about that. Even when they returned from Thule, Emma knew Julian wasn’t himself and restrained herself from getting hurt by him again.

That battle scene in the Unseelie Court was probably one of the most epic scenes in this book for me. We get Jace and Clary back, Mark and Kieran are there in chains, about to die, and there’s also Adaon, Julian, Emma, and Cristina there. I almost forgot that ASH, ANNABEL, AND THE SEELIE QUEEN WERE THERE TOO! Everything just went to shit but Kieran killed the Unseelie King, the Seelie Queen stole Adaon, Ash and Annabel jump through that portal, and soon after when the building is in flames, Julian and Emma jump through the portal too. It was absolute chaos and I loved it. And you know what scene I lived for during this whole thing? It’s when Julian is stabbing the shit out of Ethna with Simon’s D&D figurine. Amazing.

This book made me realize how crucial or very helpful it is to have read The Mortal Instruments and The Infernal Devices. I feel like if you’ve only really read TID and TDA, you won’t be able to grasp the how high the stakes are in Queen of Air and Darkness. Especially the whole deal with the Mortal sword and the Dark War.

Speaking of the Dark War.. when Emma and Julian went to Thule, I didn’t know what to expect but I was not expecting what we got. It was so different from what we know of the Shadowhunter world and it felt like a short novella inside QOAAD. But again, being honest here, that was the best part in this entire book. I was so captivated and entertained by this alternate dimension. Seeing Livia grown up and being a leader was just so nice to see, but it was also heartbreaking.

Y’all, Cameron deserved so much more. I don’t know about you guys but I didn’t really care or like Cameron because we got the bare minimum of him. I also don’t know if it was mentioned in the other books about how he was as a person but the way Emma described him in QOAAD, he seemed like a sweet and goofy guy. I mean, this boy sent Emma llama pictures when he was sad. How precious is that? He was done dirty in this book. He was locked in the city of bones while fighting for his life by his girlfriend Livvy, got stabbed by his own cousin, and was ridiculed by his entire family. Cameron needs a hug.

I am so loving how the writing and characters in this book are getting so (dare i say) “rebellious”. Cassandra Clare isn’t sugar coating ANYTHING OR ANYONE anymore. I just want to appreciate the appearance of curse words whether its in English or another language. My rebellious heart loves it. I think this also ties into the fact that a lot of these characters are so done with the bullshit that’s been thrown at them that they just don’t care about censoring themselves anymore.

Zara and the entire Cohort can go choke. That’s all I’m gonna say about them.

That last battle scene was just intense. And the build up for this scene was equally as intense. I just absolutely loved how Julian got his shit together and remembered who he was. He is a motherforking genius. He contacted everyone he knew and set up that meeting. This seventeen year old boy did that. He was also smart enough to know that there was obviously going to be spies at the meeting so he had a secluded one after the majority of people left. I knew the Cohort was screwed from there on out, even when it was revealed that “Oskar” was Annabel. I was shocked but I knew they were gonna be in deep shit. But back to that last battle scene. What the fork? Everything was going pretty smoothly until someone just had to throw the knife and kill someone. I was living for that scene with the Mortal Sword. Everything was coming out and it was so amazing. But shit happened, so there’s that.

The ending for this battle scene was a different kind of battle scene that I’m used to reading. Usually the perspective stays within the battle but Cassandra Clare included ALL perspectives of this battle, on field and out. I seriously thought that after Emma and Julian became giants, they were going to die or have all of their marks stripped. I really didn’t think they were have a happy ending. I mean, I’m happy they did but, it just doesn’t make sense. Also, I was not expecting Emma and Julian to become giants. Was it only me who imagined them as the Green Giant from the frozen vegetables thingy? Haha, yeah, just me.

I did really like how we saw so many perspectives of the battle. It made for a really good battle scene, but I guess I was a bit underwhelmed by the entire ending of this book.

THAT EPILOGUE? I was kind of expecting to get an epilogue similar to the one in Clockwork Princess. In Clockwork Princess, we get closure and I felt satisfied with the entire story but THE QOAAD EPILOGUE? I’m unsettled and I have to wait until around 2022 FOR ANSWERS. My heart will be unsettled for about 4 years. Okay. Cool.

Just the fact that this whole situation is coming full circle back to TMI but with it being more complex, is making me so tired of these assholes coming back to fuck shit up. Let these children be, goddamn it.

I seriously thought I would feel at ease when I finished QOAAD but I don’t. That’s the one thing that bothers me. This book is so big yet we have SO MANY UNANSWERED QUESTIONS AND LOOSE ENDS. Please fucking yell at me if this was also the situation for COHF because it’s been a hot minute since I’ve read it.

Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed some aspect of this even if it’s complete shit.

#queen of air and darkness #qoaad #qoaad spoilers #cassandra clare #tsc #the shadowhunter chronicles #the mortal instruments #the infernal devices #the wicked powers #the dark artifices #lady midnight #Lord Of Shadows #books #book review #Book Review Spoilers

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