#and while we don't see a LOT of supernatural activity

[victorluvsalice]

Once Smiler got back, they took a moment to take care of the bills and vote in the local NAPs while Victor finished off his chat with the Flower Bunny by sharing some pictures of Selvadorada -- as Alice had just gotten into the Artist career, and Victor and Smiler are musical, it seemed only natural to vote in “Support The Performing Arts!” So now Alice gets more money from her job, and Victor and Smiler get more influence from their guitar and piano-playing, nice. :)

Even nicer? Not only did Alice finish her book despite a few power blinks (completing her New Year’s resolution, yay!), upon looking at her inventory, I discovered two easels I didn’t remember putting in there -- two REALLY NICE easels. Checking the household inventory confirmed it -- the game had been nice enough to give Alice all the Artist career unlocks that she’d skipped over by starting at a higher level thanks to her degree! :D I was thrilled by this, sad that’s she’d missed out on some of the cool stuff, and promptly rearranged her and Victor’s bedroom to give her an “artist’s corner” with the nicest easel and a few of the decorations (you can see the sunflower vase on the side table outside, and just about spot the rack of canvases in the barn -- didn’t have room to put it anywhere else!). So now she had another dedicated painting spot -- PLUS a spare easel in her inventory to take with her around town. :p

Other good news? Smiler finished another semester in university with straight A+s! They’re down to their final term now, with another two core psychology classes -- and a guitar class for their elective, because they HAVE just taken up the instrument. :D Have to remember to do a little more college stuff with them before the end -- I want to see if I can max out their Spirit Squad rank, at least!

Anyway, with the holiday fully completed, Victor and Alice ended up taking an early bedtime, while Smiler ended up welcoming in a guest -- Caleb Vatore! The two chatted for a while, and Smiler ended up giving Caleb a bit of training because they now outrank him in vampire power. XD They also grooved together to the upstairs radio and split some time on Smiler’s computer before Caleb zoomed away again. It was about then that I noticed Smiler looking kind of thirsty, and that their plasma pack and plasma fruit stocks were running a bit low, so I had them go over to the local fishing hole to see what they could get!

. . .a future cube, an upgrade part, and a lot of seaweed. *grumps* At least they have those frogs in their inventory they can breed.

Anyway, that takes us into Tuesday! Tune in next time for some more domestic bliss, and some more occult fun! Oh, and the house finally showing some signs of being haunted, because I finally realized at the end of this session the damn thing had reverted to a REGULAR residential lot when I placed it instead of staying a Haunted House Residential. *facepalm* See you later!

#sims 4 #the lazy save #victor van dort #alice liddell #smiler always #the smiler #very pleased with Alice getting all of her unlocks there yes :) #nooot so pleased with the lack of fish in the fishing hole #and also the house not being haunted before this update #I must have chosen the wrong option when I placed it #thanks game #well it's fixed now #and while we don't see a LOT of supernatural activity #I at least have PROOF it's haunted next time #so there's that! #queued

[lani-heart]

|| series masterlist || next // previously

parings -> ( eventually ) enhypen x reader genre -> soulmate au, fantasy au, angst warnings -> angst, self-harm word count -> 1.5k

abstract -> "i'm not a monster"

y/n’s perspective

I don't understand why Jake would want to know how it feels. Seeing someone hurt should give him an idea… He even wanted to keep it a secret, but why?

I wonder if K already gave it to him… if he drank it knowing what it was. 

“Why are you so lost in your own head love?” I heard and smiled. “Just tired, Won,” I said and he chuckled. “Too tired even for me?” he teased and I smiled at him. He really was the best. “No, never for any of you,” I said and he smiled while kissing my forehead. 

“Jay is busy today, so he wanted me to tell you to eat at the cafeteria today,” he said and I nodded. “Are you gonna join me?” I asked and he chuckled. “I would, but I need to get my dinner at the cafeteria so I’d rather not let you wait,” he said and I nodded. 

It's been a while since I've eaten dinner by myself. Eunchae and Wonyoung are busy with after-school activities today. “Don’t miss me too much,” he said while speeding away. 

I packed up my stuff and decided to go to the cafeteria. 

While we could make our own food and eat at the cafeteria, we couldn’t get other foods made for different species. That's a concrete rule… humans have a specific process of checking food, it's quite similar to witches but our food has more nutrients for our energy in magic. Whilst werewolves consisted of a lot of meat… sometimes rare. Of course, vampires have blood bags and blood-infused food. 

Wait… if Jay was busy today, what was Jake gonna eat?

“I need help” I heard and I immediately got scared of the man behind me… speaking of the devil. “I know it's not your ideal way to spend the end of the day, but if I can't stomach a blood bag I won't be able to eat any of the cafeteria food,” he said and I nodded. 

“Why don’t you go into the city?” I asked and he shook his head. “The humans know I'm a vampire… It's on my uniform. They'll refuse to serve me. Why would a vampire go to a human-owned restaurant alone?” he asked and he proved a point. There was a lot of fear when it came to humans… some trusted witches and werewolves but when it came to other supernatural creatures like vampires… not so much. 

“Well… I could go with you? We could go to the witch area, there's food you can eat as a human '' I said and his eyes lit up and he grabbed my shoulders making me freeze. “Thank you! You’re a lifesaver!” he said as he let me go… I tried to calm down my over beating heart, but it wasn’t like he could hear it with the effects of the potion. 

“Do you need time to get ready?” I asked and he shook his head. “No… I just want food” he said and I understood he must be feeling an overwhelming amount of saturation. 

“Lets go wait  for the bus then”

jake’s perspective

I was happy she was true to her word and was willing to help me. 

We finally got out of the bus that took us to the nearest city. It had a lot of different species-owned shops and restaurants. While shops were okay, restaurants were hard since vampires primarily drink blood scaring humans when they go in saying they're hungry. 

“This is a human and witch-infused place. I hope you can find something you can eat” she said and I nod hoping it was true. “Jake?” I heard and I saw a she-devil. I hid behind y/n who looked at me confused. 

“Jake, you should not be hiding behind the poor girl” she scolded and she smiled at the y/n who put her hand out. “Hello, if you know Jake you must know my brother Heeseung '' she said and I could see the shocked expression on her face. “I’m sorry for those idiots, they’ve always been that way,” she said and I scoffed.

“But you’re a witch and Heeseung–” “Is a vampire? The only vampires born from them are Sunghoon, Jake, and Niki the rest were turned. Heeseung was actually a witch” she explained. 

“That's a long story though!” she said and I scoffed… 

“Oh, it's nice to meet you,” she said, causing the she-devil to smile. “Be careful, Jake. Being human is a lot harder than you think” she said, seeing right through me. “How’d you know?” I asked as I stopped hiding. “I’m a witch… of course, I'd know, '' she said. “Besides any idiot could feel the magic radiating off of you” I heard as I now saw Vernon-hyung. “Oh, uhm she’s actually in HYBE Academy '' I explained and her eyes lit up. “I want to go into HYBE Academy when I graduate!” she said with an excitement I hadn't seen before. 

“Oh? Maybe you’ll be my junior!” she said and y/n smiled. “We should get going now, your mates are waiting for you” I heard as I saw Jeonghan also. 

“Mates? I didn’t know you found your mates yet?!” I said and she chuckled. “Neither do they,” she said and I should've guessed. From what Heeseung explained she knew who her mates were before even meeting them. 

“Bye! I would love to see you again y/n!” she said as she left. “I didn’t know he had a sister, '' she said and I nodded. “She’s evil,” I said and she laughed. “She seems nice…” she said and I nodded. “Nicer than Heeseung at least but those two are the worst. Now can we order?” I asked and her eyes widened. 

“Oh! You’re right, uhm here” she said while showing me the menu. “Oh, Rabokki sounds good!” I said and she smiled. “Let's go order then,” she said and I put down the menu as we got in line. “Are you not gonna get anything?” I asked and she hummed. “I was thinking of getting the same thing actually,” she said and I chuckled. “We could just order a big one and share?” I suggested. “Are you sure?” she asked and I nodded. 

“I’ll pay by the way… as a thank you for doing this for me”

y/n’s perspective

My time with Jake was… nice. 

He was actually really funny and sweet so I felt comfortable around him. Even meeting Heeseung’s sister was shocking, but the evening was good despite my other soulmates being busy. 

“I’m so full!” he said as he yawned. “Why am I so sleepy?” he asked and I chuckled. “Because human food fills you so much that it just makes you tired. Unlike other species they don’t use anything to give extra energy to their food” I explained and he nodded. 

“Being a human… it's weird” he said and I was curious. “How does being a witch feel?” he asked, making me laugh. “I know it sounds weird,” he mutters softly with a smile. He was...

No, he likes Sooha, not me.

“Well, I almost have excessive energy that I need to release. Witches need to do magic to not only be healthy but practice” I explained and he nodded. 

“Vampires just have an excessive thirst,” he said and I nodded. “Does it make you uncomfortable with… you know eating with your mates?” he asked and I shook my head. 

“It's a natural thing, none of it bothers me,” I said and he nodded. “Being around you… is overwhelming” he said and it confused me. “Not right now! Just… as a vampire. I’m not the best with control so you constantly smell like blood” he said and I felt my eyes widen in shock. 

“I need to work on my control… control plus heavy emotions lead me to do horrible things. I’m sorry for that” he explained and I now knew it wasn’t really his fault. 

He probably was defending Sooha… but he didn’t mean to hurt me. “I still don’t know how it feels to be hurt. But I wanted to explain that” he said and I nodded. “Sorry for not hearing you out,” I said and he shook his head. 

“I don’t blame you” 

jake’s perspective

I dropped her off at her dorm when I left the school again. I went to the plains to test it out. 

I took a deep breath and summoned my fire. It was warm… then it turned hot and then turned unbearable. I couldn’t even control the scream that I let out. 

“That pain you feel right now… remember it. It was only a fraction of what you did to her” I heard as I saw Heeseung? “Asking her for a potion to make yourself human? What were you thinking?” he asked as I could only feel my vision get blurry. 

The burns hurt… the smell of burning flesh even made me gag. 

“You’ve hurt countless people, you're under a rehabilitation program Jake. You're supposed to learn not to be a monster and yet you do monstrous things” he said and it was true. 

There were vampires like him… who were made and are taught how to control whilst there's one like me who has killed and needed to be taught morals. 

“I get it… I’m still a monster”

taglist -> @sunus-sun @loumin908 @on-1ce @shinkenprincess-oh @b-a-nshee-blog @bnnyniky @sakuxxi @chiiiiiiiiis @cncreams @pre1ttyies @justanunstablefrog @graythecoffeebean @starzniiky @singlepringle4you @chirokookie @kthstrawberryshortcake-main @imtoanonymousforyou @lovgfrd @ilovecheese09 @sousydive @pink-but-rosie @kyleebob @jihyosgf @in-somnias-world @jilxxasu @bee-the-loser @mitchikeli @cyberpunksunwoo @lhspeachie @loafsunshinesworld @vixensss @zhenya109 @luumiinaa @rosas-in-the-garden @b3tt7boop @moony-mari @vixialuvs @ilovecheese09 @capri-cuntz

please don't be a silent reader !! reblog, comment, and like <3

#enhypen #enhypen x reader #enhypen bright sun #enhypen x female reader #enhypen poly au #enhypen heeseung #enhypen heeseung x reader #heeseung x reader #enhypen jake #enhypen jake x reader #jake x reader #enhypen sunghoon #enhypen sunghoon x reader #sunghoon x reader #enhypen jay #enhypen jay x reader #jay x reader #enhypen sunoo #enhypen sunoo x reader #sunoo x reader #enhypen jungwon #enhypen jungwon x reader #jungwon x reader #enhypen niki #enhypen niki x reader #niki x reader

[syrena-del-mar]

Dead Friend Forever Is More Than Just A 90s Slasher Film Imitation

Oh man, I went in thinking I would just get a whole lot of gore and murder, and instead I'm getting a buttload of social class distinction, parental issues, mental health crises, organized crime, and a highly-likely revenge plot line.

The thing about Dead Friend Forever is that it starts unassuming, almost like an copy of all other teen slashers from the 90s. A group of friends, up in a cabin and suspects to a potential murder, become hunted one-by-one. A cliche slasher plot if I ever heard one. Until it’s not. This show is taking up a very big corner of my brain, so I’m going to delve deeper into it.

If you haven't watched episode 6 yet, spoilers up ahead.

Pulling inspiration from 90s slasher re-inventor, Scream

The first four episodes really set up the expectation that DFF was going to be another slasher, seemingly particularly influenced by Scream (1996). Scream was a turning point for slasher movies, signaling a shift in from the movies of the 80s to that of the 90s. It was the first of many movies to allow for the characters to be self-aware of what genre they're working in, where the characters knew of the slasher-movie tropes and attempted to do everything right to survive. Scream is also the first slasher to truly humanize the killers, and I don't mean by making them empathetic, but rather the killers were human, so they made human mistakes. Prior to Scream, the antagonists in slasher films were usually this supernatural villain that was just murder-hungry. But in Scream, the killers are all just regular people and would often make mistakes on their way to kill the protagonists, like a normal human would. It's why Scream was scary, the killer could be anyone, it wasn't this supernatural being. And even when you're making the right choices to escape, you still end up dead.

In Dead Friend Forever, we're getting so many of the same tropes that Scream had subverted. The group is working understanding exactly what they're facing; Fluke warning to not pull out the stake inside Por, Top wanting to split up in the temple while Phee, Jin and Tan veto against it expressly stating it would be like the horror movies, White not wanting to be left behind in the cabin. They all know what they shouldn't be doing while there is a killer on the loose. Also, it's why there's these funny little moments of the killer in DFF (i.e. having to steal the motorcycle to get back to the cabin). I'm not completely convinced that there isn't any paranormal activity or at least some type hallucinogen-component at play, but the way the killer acts is very human-like. Not to mention the parallel of Barcode (arguably the most popular actor in the show) getting slashed in the first minute of the show, eerily similar to how in the opening scene of Scream, Drew Barrymore (the most well-known of the cast) gets killed immediately.

The Benefits of Series Format versus Movie Format

The series format is where I think Dead Friend Forever is really shining the most. @wen-kexing-apologist made an awesome post on the directorial direction this show is taking, particularly in how since the first four episodes we have very little context as to why the killings are occurring or even the state of everyone's relationship, we're freely able to form opinions on each character. Similarly, prior to getting to know what happened to Non, I also thought Tee was the better one of the group. But here we are, two episodes later and I find him to be the most detestable of the bunch (which says something, when Por and Top are competing in this category).

We're seeing and experiencing the absolute hell that this friend group had actively made (sans Jin and Fluke that suffer from the bystander effect) Non's life out to be. In a regular slasher movie, especially ones that model themselves after Scream, we find out why the Killer is doing what he's doing to the victims in the last quarter of the movie, but the emotional value is a little skewed. The little amount of time we spend learning about what the victims did to the Killer usually still leaves you feeling at least a smidge of pity for the victims and some joy that the Final Girl made it. Here, the mass consensus is that each and every one of them should die.

And it comes back to the luxury of spending several episodes in a flashback to what lead up to the killings after the game of cat-and-mouse has begun. We're introduced to Non as an outsider, where everyone, but Jin, has already formed a bad opinion of Non. They already have a brutal nickname for him (read @forkaround's awesome analysis on the term 'Greasy'). They already established that he's an outsider in the classroom, but they make an active point of only referring to him as 'Greasy' and Non just accepts it. We see the friend group frame him, causing him to spiral twice to point of suicide, proceed to prey on him into a money laundering scheme, get him caught in a criminal investigation, all while already undergoing mental health treatment. We're given that time to know and see the pain that Non is caused, the manipulation that he is put under, and ultimately the devastation that they've caused.

Dead Friends Forever is more than just another teen slasher, because it has time. And it's using its time wisely, giving us bits and pieces of information in the beginning before delving into something more sinister than the killer on the loose, the original five. Run-of-the-mill bullying has turned into framing, assault and other criminal activity, even murder. And yet, while Non is the one that has disappeared (or died), the other five have been able to make a life for themselves without suffering any of the consequences. It's showing exactly what they have done to deserve everything that is coming to them.

Final Thoughts

Man, Be on Cloud is truly blowing it out of the water with this show. I'm actually a bit sad that it's only barely starting to get the recognition that it deserves, because in my opinion, it's just that good, BUT I also understand why it's had a sleepy start. It's in an place, a BL in one sense, but not exactly a BL in any other. I've said it before, but no matter what you think of BOC as a management company, the stories that they tell are unique and they have the artists that are competent enough to deliver. Be on Cloud has, allegedly, allowed the writers take the reign on the show, even if this means messing with the couples, so even more chaos is going to occur. This is, frankly, exciting to see and experience the story as they want it to be told.

I said this when I first saw Barcode in KinnPorsche deliver that heartbreaking cry, that boy knows how to cry. He was a newbie and his stole that scene. Now this is his third show under his belt and his acting chops only continue to improve, I truly can't wait to see what more he is able to do here in Dead Friend Forever. I love that Sammon is also enjoying what Barcode has able to bring forth in Non and that all her worries have been eased. I truly think that Barcode is going to have an incredible career ahead of him, whether in music or in acting.

Ta, on the other hand, also deserves his share of accolades. I wasn't sure of how to read to Phee in the first four episodes, but with the information that episode 6 has given us? The picture has cleared significantly and now, having rewatched his scenes, everything makes sense on why he seemed to be conniving. Episode 6 had some of the strongest performances and yet the biggest gasp I made was in the last minute. The singular tear rolling down Phee's cheek after having to perform the two-finger method, to have Non throw up the pills, and holding him in his arms? Quite literally jaw-dropping.

Sammon has a strong repertoire of shows, so I have complete faith that she knows what she's doing for Dead Friend Forever. I hope this becomes as much of a cult favorite, much like Manner of Death and Triage.

Anyways if you need me, I'll probably be stuck thinking about PheeNon for the next week until episode 7 airs.

#dead friend forever #dead friend forever the series #dead friend forever meta #dff meta #dff the series #barcode tinnasit #ta nannakun #copper phuriwat #pheenon #be on cloud #pheejin #tabarcode #boc actors #thai bl #thai bl meta #bl meta #steph rambles

[darubyprincx]

BREAKING NEWS: The queer-themed superhero Arrow Ace has been out on a justice-fuelled rampage this Valentine's Day Morning, sniping villains from above and appearing randomly to whack people who are being rude to the happily single on the day of love.

This is the first appearance that the Arrow Ace has made since October of last year, and we now go to our field reporter Devon, who has managed to get an interview with the enigmatic hero.

Devon: Thank you Gary! I'm here on the corner of 12th and 7th street in downtown Placeville and next to me is the Arrow Ace, who has graciously agreed to be interviewed. AA: Hello. Devon: Sir, many of our newer viewers want to know who you are and what you do. Do you have an answer for them? AA: Yes. Hi. I'm the Arrow Ace, but you can just call me Ace. I was the sharpest shooter in my archery class in college and later decided to make a pun regarding my identity and thus, the hero personality was born. Devon: So do you have any supernatural abilities or are you just really good with a bow? AA: None whatsoever. I'm just a normal guy 99% of the time. Devon: [short pause to listen through her earpiece] Ah. Yes. A question from the studio. Viewers, Ace is most likely referring to the pun his alias makes when talking about his identity. AA: Yes. I am indeed an aromantic asexual, commonly shortened to aro/ace. Devon: Could you perhaps elaborate on that for those watching who might not know what that means! AA: Of course! A person who is aromantic experiences little, decreased, or no romantic attraction to other people. This may manifest as them not getting crushes, not wanting to participate in dating, or being adverse to romantic activities in general. A person who is asexual experiences little, decreased, or no sexual attraction towards other people. They might not want to participate in sexual activities and may be uncomfortable when the topic is brought up in real life or in media. Devon: I see! Thank you for explaining. Does this have anything to do with your backstory? AA: Yes. I originally took up the mask because as a young man, although I didn't have a word for what I was yet, I was often excluded in school both intentionally and not for not having an interest in dating people. In high school, someone who heard I wasn't interested in sex but also hadn't tried it out yet assaulted me to try and "convince" me otherwise. Ever since, I've been trying my best to be a beacon of light for those going through similar or worse ever since to let them know that there's nothing wrong with them and that you can be happy without those types of relationships. Devon: I see! Is there any reason why you're out and about on Valentine's day specifically? AA: I get asked a lot when seen alone in public if I'm single on this holiday. Most of the time, when I answer with yes, the response is something like "oh you poor soul! May you find love soon!" While the person undoubtedly means well, it still annoys me, so I've decided today to be the guy every aro or ace person wishes they had during that conversation.

[B-roll footage filmed on someone's phone of two person having a conversation. The first person asks "So, got any plans this evening?" The second person uncomfortably replies, "No, not really." The first person responds with "Oh, no! Well, better luck next year. Maybe you'll find someone," promptly cut off mid sentence by the Arrow Ace running up behind them and pwhacking them over the head with a paper towel tube. "You're not less whole or less of a person for not having a romantic or sexual partner," he says to the first person, pointing the tube at them. "That is your business and your business alone. I love you. Have a good day." The two people having the conversation stare after him, perplexed, as he runs off out of view of the camera. The video cuts back to Devon and AA.]

Devon: One last question: how do you know if the person in those discussions is aro or ace? AA: I don't, and I never put them on the spot for it. However, whether you experience attraction to others or not, it's never fun to be judged based on the circumstances you may be in at the moment. Devon: A bit of wisdom for us all. Well, sir, it appears that my time is up, but I appreciate you coming to answer these questions. AA: Of course. And, to all who participate, Happy Valentine's day! The shops always have discounts on chocolate the day after. Go treat yourself if you have the means. You deserve it. Devon: This has been Devon of Lucky 7 News. Back to you, Gary!

Thank you, Devon. I have received reports that a new development is unfolding in southeast Placeville- the Nefarious Anglerfish's cat-fish army is leaping up from the docks to attack unsuspecting couples on their walks. I've been told that the Arrow Ace is on his way to get involved. We'll be right back after these advertisements.

#ray's tag #writing #keys' writing #valentine's day #aro #ace #aromantic #asexual #aroace #since i can't provide a video today have this short bit of writing instead! #happy valentines day to all who observe :] #valentines day #sa mention

[mystycalypso]

I'm gonna go on a mini rant here.

TW: p3d0ph1lia, and child s/@

God, I shouldn't have to put a TW like that on a blog where I post Hello Neighbor content with my bff, but I need to just- let off steam about this because it's something that seems to happen every time there's a franchise centering around kids facing a big bad adult where- people assume that said big bad s3xually @ buses one or more of the minor characters.

A main big example of this is obviously FNAF, with the P3d0philia William Afton being popularized by PinkiePills with her comics to the point where a large chunk of the fandom believes that it's canonical. Despite that not being the case.

The example that has pushed me over the edge to talk about this today is Theodore Peterson. I have been worried since Episode 6s release that people were going to claim that Peterson S/@ ed Nicky. And today, low and behold I see a post (not gonna name drop them for obvious reasons) saying

"At this point it's obvious what Mr. Peterson did to Nicky" with the teaser image tinybuild recently posted

Now, at first my autistic ass said, "...What?" And I couldn't figure out for the life of me what they were referring to because I mean, we don't even know when this shot is from

Then I open the comments and see people talking about whether or not it was infact s/@ . I know I said I was expecting and dreading this, but it still shocked and bewildered me because- there's genuinely nothing in the show that actually makes it seem like this.

Thankfully, a lot of the comments were openly disagreeing with this idea and sentiment. But- I need to discuss why it's a problem to me, ESPECIALLY with this franchise, which I've already explained is very near and dear to me.

But good FUCKING GOD, especially with WTRB

THIS IS A KIDS SHOW

Is WTRB able to go much darker than most kids' shows because it isn't run on tv or owned by a network? Absolutely. But would TB go that far? FUCK NO.

I've seen this person using moments from the show like this

To call Mr. Peterson, a p3d0phil3, and I need to clearly explain the purpose of this image. It is to show the power he has built in his lies. Trinity witnessed Mr. Peterson kidnap Nicky before her own eyes, but he has built up such a persona as this pathetic old man in the town that even when she can see behind his lies and see his actively horrific behavior, no one else can.

We see this same back and forth in all their interactions in episode 5. From the moment he offers cookies based on Nicky's goggles to the framing of him looming while her parents work the printer. He believes he has won and can flaunt it because there is no one in Ravenbrooks who believes these kids. No one even notices or is suspicious of Nicky going missing in the first place.

And if Trinity was also an adult or even if Mr. Peterson was say- a woman this wouldn't be coming up or a theory/hc. It is only because Theodore is an older male antagonist.

Now, why is this a problem? Why do these hcs and theories urk me so much every time I see them?

It adds nothing. All they do is make the story "edgier" and "darker" in a way that's so- flat and dimensionless. There's nothing gained by saying "oh Nicky was s/@ ed" if anything you have taken so much from the actual story of Hello Neighbor and the themes of feeling helpless to the horrors you see going on around you. You're not taken seriously as a kid, especially after doing something others see as a slip up like Trinity or by not being the model student type like Nicky. You're young and can see through the lies of others easier but no one believes you.

Not only that, but the supernatural theming of Hello Neighbor is lost because of this. The Guest, The Thing, the Cult, everything is lost or disregarded all to make the series dark on a very surface level.

I'm tired of actual themeing and good writing getting thrown to the wayside for hcs that do nothing for victim representation and do nothing to add to the story and I say this with utter genuineness

If you believe in these p3d0 hcs and theories, do not interact with our work.

Kaydin and I are both VIOLENTLY disgusted by the things we saw written by that poster and by the comments agreeing with their sentiment and we don't want to be associated with the parts of the fandom that twist the series that way.

Thanks for reading.

#welcome to raven brooks #hello neighbor #hello neighbor welcome to raven brooks #non art post #non art #hello neighbor theories #nicky roth #theodore peterson #serious post #vent #personal rant #I hate even having to write this because it's so disgusting

[protectingtulpas]

So I just got sent that pretty iconic "anti-tulpa" document and I think it's pretty damn funny that a lot of those sources, if you actually READ them, are neutral or even supportive lmfao.

Like for this one? This is straight up pro-, and is just explaining that "tulpamancy" isn't the original concept and that it's based on other practices. Congrats, you're making our fucking point for us!

This next one is pretty interesting also. I wanna highlight some stuff from it, from both the op and comments.

Let's talk about my existence in contrast to some of these statements. The first one is "The biggest, most dangerous form of evil in Buddhist thought is "ego" or self-grasping. If ANY mental phenomena increases your self-cherishing attitudes (self importance, grandiosity, jealousness, craving, hatred, self-loathing, self-absorption etc) it's evil. IF a mental phenomena causes greater flexibility, less attachment, more tranquil emotions, less mental chatter/discursive thinking, increased generosity and compassion toward others, higher mental clarity etc.--that's good." And the second one is "If it increases negative emotions, it's not Dharma. If it decreases negative emotions, it's Dharma." So these are great for some people, but that mentality of not allowing "self-cherishing attitudes" can be EXTREMELY HARMFUL FOR SYSTEMS and ANYONE with self worth issues. A lot of this is contradictory for a lot of people. Something can both decrease negative emotions and make you feel connected to yourself. Nobody has the right to make us feel any less like ourselves - normally you can believe whatever you want for yourself, obviously, but pushing it onto other ppls' lives aint cool. The implication that we're straight up DANGEROUS just for existing is insulting to created systems regardless of whether you're using the word tulpa or not.

The reply to that by @/eeveecraft is great, and this part describes how weird that is in the context of headmates' identities here. "Furthermore, really don't like how you downplayed tulpas as property there, buddy. Tulpas are not property, they are people in every sense of the word, and I don't [give a] flying fuck about whatever complications that for your beliefs. My systemmates are people, full stop. I was already able to tell since you refer to your own systemmates as "imaginary friends," which a lot of tulpas aren't okay with being called that because that implies that they're fake. They are NOT lesser because they're not created by ancient monks or whatever.

"Like, seriously: "They would be considered "as real as you and me," with their own likes and dislikes etc," because apparently, modern tulpas don't have likes and dislikes and their hosts just see them as delusions? Say that to my tulpa, Arcanus who adores coffee while the smell makes me nauseous, say that to my systemmates who switch with me and have their own hobbies. Also, tulpas are more than just personalities. They have their own experiences, skills, preferences, dreams, memories, thoughts, a person is more than just their personality, and I thought a "licensed psychotherapist" would know that, especially if they have systemmates of their own." Make sure to read the full comment tho cuz it's a good takedown, it's not just about that it goes thru the entire thing.

SO! If anybody actually wants a well-studied paper outlining everything, check out Tracking the Tulpa: Exploring the "Tibetan" Origins of a Contemporary Paranormal Idea by Natasha L. Mikles and Joseph P. Laycock. It goes into a lot more of an accurate and in-depth history on the subject, and the bibliography ACTUALLY shows where things come from.

All that document showed us was that Buddhists are a wide community with a variety of different people with different skill levels, understandings, and opinions. And that we need to ditch the fantastical, impossible representation of the tulpa in supernatural media because that's ACTIVELY harming people. Which is what we want to show people! So congrats!

#im not linking it cuz its cherry picked as hell #but if youve been here a while you know what it is #if you want the document shoot me a message #that shit needs to stop circulating #syscourse #tulpacourse

[henrysglock]

“real ones left byler behind for greener ST pastures (the Creel/NINA plotline) because that shit is crack cocaine once you're in it”

People are interested in what they’re interested in. It seems like y’all are already predisposed to being more into that kinda stuff, and that’s totally fine- no offense, we all have our own taste! But it seems like you all took your lessened interest in byler/dissatisfaction with the fandom/lack of obsession with will/connection to henry and made into your whole personality while many of us haven’t left because we simply aren’t interested in the same things. You can’t make someone care about things more than they love byler.

The creel/nina stuff will never be crack cocaine to those of us who aren’t predisposed to it. personally, nina was my second least favorite part of S4 (I didn’t really like the flashbacks, which I found boring/repetitive), and the creel stuff IS interesting, but I only really care about the supernatural stuff as it relates to mike/will. And it’s cool while watching it, but it’s not what runs in my mind everyday with specificity. The characters do. And what converted me from being part of the GA- a passionate fan, but still GA (I was never active in the fandom during the off-season)- was byler. I’m here for the gays. And I think that’s true for a lot of us here.

What that opener tells me is that you missed my entire point with those tags.

The reblog I was replying to was saying that they left byler behind because ST4 wasn't good. I said I left byler behind for greener ST pastures because a) NINA is more interesting to me and b) that area of the fandom is less toxic. So...did you or did you not comprehend the context there?

It wasn't about:

"oughrghrghr byler BAD. byler BORING!!11!!!!111 find better plotlines LOSERS!!!! NINA BEST PLOT 4 EVER!!!!!"

It was about:

"Hey, just because I'm put off by the byler fandom because it's self-admittedly a toxic dump these days and I can see the ways bylers screwed themselves over as a fandom doesn't mean I think ST4 was bad. I just found a part of it that was better for me in general".

So you can take your "You can’t make someone care about things more than they love byler" and shove it, because that was never and has never been what I'm trying to do.

Also...I'm about to earn my title as "mean and condescending", because you've caught me in a special mood.

I genuinely don't care that you don't like the supernatural plot outside stuff that relates to M/W. I don't care that you favor characters over plot. I think favoring characters over plot, only being "here for the gays", and devaluing backstories/sub-plots or cherry-picking them for only what relates to your fave little gaybies is a detriment to your understanding of them. For example, the Russia arc isn't my favorite, but I still hype it up what for does irt subtext for the story as a whole, even as it relates to characters who aren't my favorites. I care about NINA because I care about Will's vanishing. I care about Will's vanishing because I care about NINA. You can't claim to care about the characters and then just cherry-pick your way through the plots for what you think relates to your faves, because it ALL contributes to the forces that shape your faves! If you actually cared about the characters outside of "ouaghh will we get to see the boys KISS 😳???", you'd care about the inner workings of the plot as a whole.

So, in short: skill issue.

So actually, to refute your point: I do care about Will. I just do it with a more nuanced lens than 99% of bylers. I care about him as both a character and as a cog in the plot. I care about his good moments and bad moments, and how his behavior/character development might tie into the progression of the overall plot and affect all the other characters. In fact, I'd argue I care about Will more genuinely and with more objective intellectual depth than 99% of bylers...and I'm able to do so because I understand and care about the plots that shape him.

And complaining about me making my connection to Henry my whole personality is so fucking funny coming from "I'm here for the gays". Unparalleled hypocrisy. Many such cases, unfortunately.

I'm dissatisfied with the fandom. That is very true. Shit like this is precisely the reason why. I'm so fucking fed up with this kind of self-centered, self-righteous behavior that's indicative of a fucking victim complex worth speaking to a psychiatrist about.

Now go back to obsessing over boys kissing and stop making harassing me your entire personality.

#i've been putting up with this shit for like a year now. people say i've been mean but even this is just scratching the surface tbh. #and for anyone who feels like sending a follow-up? don't bother #asks

[sonkitty]

Crowley S2 Hair Post #0 - Before the Beginning

Introduction

I'll actually be talking about more than the sideburns throughout these posts. I don't know if I'll really go through the minisodes later because I just plain don't get these parts, but I'll decide that when the time comes. For this one, I figured I could take the extra time to do it even though I highly prefer present day Crowley to any and all versions of him.

...

Sideburns Check

The sideburns are longer than we've known them to be on Crowley compared to season 1. They are even in length and similar in texture whereas later present day scenes in season 2 will actually show subtle differences even between the sideburns themselves.

Compared to what we'll see in later scenes, these sideburns are not the longest-length we'll be seeing in the bookshop and close to the end of episode 6 when Crowley is standing at the door to his car.

They more closely match a length like what the car gives with a demonic presence and what they will be for Crowley during extensive parts of episodes 5 and 6 when they don't reach their longest-length.

So, generally that puts them at a supernatural reading in this open space. Well, Earth and humans don't exist yet, so that matches some understanding of how they operate in the present day storyline.

If there is any rank idea to just play around and guess at, in the context of this scene, I would go with Throne.

Generally, I figure Crowley's highest rank was "First-Order Archangel," due to the deliberate framing in episode 6 when a recording of Gabriel claims to be the only one in the Universe. Still, his rank could have changed during his time as an angel, and this version of Crowley doesn't seem to be as high as what I would expect for a First-Order Archangel.

The Throne idea is from a few clues combined from both seasons. He had a noticeable ornate throne in his flat in season 1. Beelzebub summoned him directly onto a throne in S2E1. Muriel specified "Throne" as one of the ranks required to possibly unlock Gabriel's file. Stuff like that.

...

Streak Check

There is no evident more saturated streak of red in Crowley's hair here, which is to be expected in this context. The streak is mainly on for a great deal of the present day story and 1941 minisode but not in other memories. He's got an energetic active curl on the top of his head though. There's also a part in his hair that is above the center of his left eye. Above the center of his left eye is a key place to generally find that streak later.

...

Earthly Objects

For myself on trying to figure out Earthly Objects, the three objects present were eventually understood as a clue to the existence of the Rule of Three within the game itself. Likewise, Crowley's use of the book, for me, was eventually a clue that a supernatural touch onto an earthly object still counted as a touch.

Earth gets a special mention during the scene.

...

Story Commentary

Before the Beginning starts us off with an angel who eventually becomes Crowley. We are intentionally not given his name. While I've seen other posts refer to him as "Starmaker," I'm just going to stick with calling him "Crowley" anyway because that's what the subtitles did. If I remember things properly, I think it's noteworthy that Crowley himself never says his own name the whole season, for any given time period.

Nonetheless, we have entered season 2 a lot differently than season 1. God is not here to narrate. For this segment, no one here is to narrate. We saw Crowley first. Crowley is going to effectively bookend the entire season overall.

We learn some new things, but we're going to learn more clearly later that this story is not to be trusted as it is directly presented to us. Something is very, very off with reality. Among God's last lines to us in season 1 was, "Perhaps the recent exertions had had some fallout in the nature of reality, because while they were eating for the first time ever, a nightingale actually did sing in Berkeley Square." The second part sounds sweet, but the first part with "fallout" and "reality" is something to keep in mind, given what we'll be seeing later.

Not only is something off with reality, something is off with memories. This part is a memory.

It's generally over my head on whatever is going on with this memory beyond stuff already mentioned. I have loads of speculation but nothing I really find worth sharing.

Personally speaking, I don't care much for this scene. I have an extreme fondness for the demon part of Crowley that is Crowley, especially the snake. I'm also a total sucker for black-feathered wings, which are purposely not here. I hope that, given the context of the scene itself, this part is setting us up for seeing Crowley's actual Fall in season 3. It's not exactly an expectation, but that's what this scene makes me want to see.

...

The Sideburns Scheme

#crowley #good omens 2 #good omens #good omens s2 #david tennant #good omens season 2 #good omens meta #good omens crowley #crowley good omens #crowley s2 hair project

[laurel-finch]

'I Don't Bite' S1.Ch10: Winds of Change

Summary: Returning to the Winchesters does not meet expectations... Referenced Episodes: S1 E16 "Shadow" CW: Alcohol. Arguing. Normal Supernatural things. Another ridiculously long chapter, my b. Word Count: 8209 Recommended Song: Winds of Change -- Scorpions Previous Chapter -- Masterlist -- Next Chapter

I gnawed on my lower lip as I jammed another number into my phone, praying that this time one of the brother’s would pick up. I had a handful of Dean’s phone numbers and only two of Sam’s, but I knew they had more that they hadn’t felt the need to share with me. It all came down to which phone they were actively using for the case they were on. There was no consistency with them.

I glared down at the number I knew to be linked to Dean’s ATF persona. There was a chance he would answer, but it was slim. I really needed a better way to get ahold of the brothers. I sighed and hoped I would have better luck with Sam as I dialed one of his numbers next.

After six long rings, the call dropped. No answer. I pinched the bridge of my nose and kicked at a pebble in the middle of the deserted motel parking lot. Apparently, I'd need to call all of their numbers.

Three numbers in I finally heard a receiving click on the other end and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Hello?" came Sam's gruff voice on the other end. I was surprised to hear his voice instead of his older brother's.

"Sam? Hey, it’s me," I heard a lot of shuffling from the other end, like he had bolted upright from shock. “Where, um… where are you guys?”

Sam was silent for a beat before speaking again. "Is everything alright?" I flinched at the wariness in his tone.

"I'm fine, Sam. Better than fine actually," I answered quietly. I placed my other hand over the speaker of the phone and turned my back to the motel parking lot conspiratorially. My voice dropped to a soft tone. "Look, I… I know it’s been a while and you probably don’t want to see me, but-"

"I do," he interjected quickly and I clamped my mouth shut. "Believe me, I do- we do. But what about your pack? And, well… I mean, Dean’s pretty pissed. He’s been pissed. He’s been throwing himself into this hunt for dad."

I frowned at the worn pavement beneath my feet. I figured he would be mad at me, but facing the reality of the situation hurt regardless. Maybe I could just… ignore it all. Go back to my pack, forget it ever happened. Like I never met them. Would that be easier?

No. No, that would hurt more. I mentally cursed myself for getting so attached. "Did you tell him why?”

"Yeah, yeah I tried to explain it to him. But… well, look at it from his perspective. Dean’s spent his whole life killing, and the one time he decides not to…" he sounded distraught and I heard more shuffling from the other end.

He didn’t need to finish his thought for me to know what he meant. Dean had done me a favor by not killing me when we first met. At the time it hadn’t felt like much of a favor – maybe death would have been safer. But now, with how much our lives had changed… it was understandable that he was frustrated. The one different choice he made led to a human being killed and me running off without a word.

I fell silent, pondering what to say next. How was I supposed to explain to them why I left? I think Sam understood better than he was letting on. It wasn’t too dissimilar to why he left for college, although his reasoning wasn’t nearly as bloody. But Dean… it made sense that he would be hurt…

"I want to see you, Sam – both of you. I want to apologize to Dean, but I can't do that unless I see him."

Sam sighed from the other end. "OK. I'll… keep you updated on where we are.”

After a flood of profuse thank-yous and Sam's chuckles, the line finally went dead. He had given me a location amongst my gratitude and I was already slinging my backpack over my shoulder.

—

After half a day of travel, the sun was setting and I was thoroughly exhausted. Upon seeing the welcome sign that coaxed me into the small city I stretched my arms high above my head and allowed myself to slow to a steady walking pace.

Oddly enough, my heart felt heavy, like something severe was weighing on me. It was... an odd sensation that I hadn't felt in a very long time - not since my parents were still with me. Oddly enough, it was less of a weighing feeling and more of a tug. The tug itself was heavy, and it felt like it was pulling on a part of me that I didn't want to be released.

Something didn’t feel right.

I hummed and frowned slightly, my eyebrows creasing with worry. Maybe it was a mistake to come looking for the Winchesters before the pack? I had half a mind to turn back, but... I still didn't feel ready. If Sam and Dean were afraid of what I had done, how would my pack feel? They depended on the stability and different lifestyle my home provided. I kicked the occasional large stone out of my way as I traipsed down the road, headed toward whatever lay at the end of it. Hopefully a warm bed.

After another thirty minutes of walking, something I grumbled about to myself, I finally spotted dim lights behind a row of thick pine trees. My ears pricked at the sound of the engines roaring to life in the early night, something that oddly warmed my heart and made me want to prance. It wasn't long after that the stench of alcohol hit my nose.

The bar was a brick building on the edge of town, a neon sign glowing above the door and the building itself set into the corner of the block. The occasional car or motorcycle was parked out front. I smiled and brushed my hand affectionately over the front of an older motorcycle – I had always wanted to learn how to ride them. I wondered what it felt like to be on something so small, barrelling down a highway faster than I could run.

My eyes rose, scanning the line of cars until they settled on a sleek older model across the street. My eyes widened and a grin tore across my face. It was the Impala.

I whirled toward the door so fast that I nearly fell over, tripping over my own feet like a stumbling drunk. My senses dulled as the stench of alcohol hit my nose once again. The harsh smell practically threw me off my feet and made my eyes water. I couldn't place any other scent amongst the heavy, bourbon-filled air and that alone sunk anxious claws into my lungs, oxygen being stolen from them.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, grounding myself. The overwhelming scents and smells were driving my wolfish senses crazy, as they still hadn't calmed from my last escapade with the brothers. It had been weeks since I was in a room with this many people. I felt small and large at the same time. Small with worry and nerves. Large with fearsome hunger.

I rolled my shoulders and took a few more deep breaths, sifting through the heavily masked scents. My eyes flew open as a familiar scent hit my nose and I struggled to keep the rising gold color down.

Cherries.

I pushed my way through the crowd of drunkards and bikers. It was exactly the kind of scene Dean liked. Loud enough to quiet his own raging thoughts. Dark enough to dull the headache behind his eyes. Music he could get lost in, and a drink that burned just right.

"Hey," I spoke cautiously as I sat beside him and rested my forearms on the bar counter. Dean spared me a glance from the corner of his green eye and suddenly jumped. He did a double take out of shock and turned to me with wide eyes and parted lips. As suddenly as his surprise had come, it was gone and darkened with spite.

"What do you want?" he growled and took a long sip from his whiskey glass, failing to hide his frown.

I frowned, my brows knitted with frustration. I could already tell this wasn't going to be a good conversation. "I came to apologize."

Dean scoffed and tightened his grip on his glass. "Apologize for what? Abandoning us without a word?" he exhaled and glared at me. "That's not something I'll accept an apology for, sweetheart." I bristled. Although most of his nicknames were endearing, this one was spat out like it burned him.

"I had my reasons, Dean. You know I wouldn't leave without a good one-"

"Do I know that?" he snarled, spinning his stool to face me. "Cause it seems like you don't give a damn about Sam or me, or how we felt." I winced and opened my mouth to speak. He shushed me with a raised finger. "So what's your excuse? You got tired of us holding you back from going apeshit?"

Ow. I glowered at him. "You know I would never do that."

"Yeah? You seemed pretty content when you had your teeth sunk into Jared Bender's heart." I winced again, my glare cracking. "You didn't even know his name, did you?"

"He was trying to kill Sam," I growled, trying to justify my actions. "You would have done the same."

"Damn right I would have killed him. I would have shot his ass dead, would’ve been dead before he hit the dirt. But I certainly wouldn't have torn him apart and strung his organs around the room!" he growled between his teeth. He tried to keep his voice low, despite the uninterested roar of the bar occupants.

I balled my fists in my lap and glared at him as he twisted to face me. His jaw was set sternly, lips pressed into a thin line. It was the same look he gave Sam when the two argued. “You’re a hypocrite.” My tone caused my words to lose their bite.

"I'm a hypocrite? You fucking killed and nearly ate a man, and now you're trying to justify it to me!" he snapped, one corner of his mouth drawn up in a sneer. "You left Sam and me without a word! And now you're crawling back here to apologize and call me a hypocrite?"

My blood was boiling and once more my senses were raging. I couldn't quite grasp it, but it almost felt like a separation inside me, one side longing to beg for forgiveness and the other itching to sink its fangs into Dean's neck. I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes, struggling to ground myself again.

Maybe a few months as friends wasn’t enough to convince him I wasn’t worth the trouble. Maybe he should’ve aimed for the head when we first met.

Without missing a beat I snapped back at him. "Quit acting like a girl whose prom date stood her up. I had my reasons and if you'll shut up for a few minutes, I'll tell you what was going through my head," I exhaled shakily and glared, steeling myself for his own reproachful response. "I left to protect you, to protect Sam, and to protect everyone around you. I wasn't stable – you know that, you saw it. So stop talking like a self-righteous prick."

Despite the quick tongue-lashing, I still didn't feel better. I hadn't said half of what I wanted to. If I could have given Dean a glimpse inside my thoughts, I would have in a heartbeat.

His frown remained stalwart on his features, furrowed brows unyielding. His viridescent eyes surveyed my own with contempt and barely contained anger, an emotion I mirrored. Eventually, his gaze reluctantly dropped back to the beer I had passed him, which he took a swig of. I felt a small victory until he spoke up.

"Get out," he grumbled.

"What?" I demanded with equal, if not more, frustration.

"Get out," he ordered more firmly this time with rage coating his words. I blinked in confusion – not just at his harsh words, but at the gripping pain in my chest and the harsh scratching, I felt in the back of my mind, like something fighting to escape. It struck me that Dean was really, truly angry with me for leaving, despite my reasoning – and from what I knew of him, he wasn't just going to forgive and forget.

He swore under his breath and whipped his head toward me, eyes raging with rage and, to my amazement, pain. "Are you deaf?" he snarled lowly, "I don't want to hear your excuses. Fuck off." He gripped his beer tightly and guzzled it then slammed it onto the counter.

Wrath hit me like a semi-truck, and that familiar clawing sensation I kept hidden in the back of my thoughts lunged forward. Those nagging thoughts took the form of my wolf, black fur ruffled and fangs bared in anger.

Whatever wolfish instincts I had let escape were now clawing to take control. For the first time in a long time, I felt like two beings at once. As I had surmised earlier, I had the very human side that wanted nothing more than to avoid conflict, that just wanted to apologize to Dean and work things out. But my monster side...

I gulped and glared viciously at Dean.

I felt a rumble low in my chest, a familiar rumble that I had last felt with my father. My wolf wanted me to tear into Dean, a human that we had somehow bound to our pack. Now this pup was blatantly challenging me, as she put it. She snarled at him and I resisted the urge to follow suit.

She was pacing in my mind, stalking back and forth, her molten eyes fixated on Dean. My own eyes faded to match the warm gold of hers, whiskey-colored in the faded glow of the bar lights.

I hadn't even realized just how much I was shaking. My wolf wanted out, wanted to shred him for his disloyalty. It was an odd feeling to be separated from a piece of myself, although the more I focused on her, the more I realized that we had been separated for a long time. For years, I lacked the fluid mobility between myself and my instinct, not the mobility that I once had. I hadn't had it since I was fifteen. It felt like I was holding back a tidal wave of torrential emotions, a painful instinct that wanted me to embrace the monster I was and chow on some hearts. Not Dean though. She wanted him back in his place as my... pack member? Was that what she- I viewed him as?

Dean swore again, finally breaking eye contact. He reached for his beer with a shaky hand and took another final swig before wiping his mouth and standing. "Fuck this," he grumbled, "I'm out."

He hadn't even made it three steps before something in me snapped and I snarled. "Sit your ass down before I sink my teeth into you and drag you back."

Dean whirled on me, chest heaving with fury. I turned my blazing golden eyes on him, slowly, with my mouth set into a firm line and eyebrows slightly drawn together. It struck me that this was the same look my mother had given my father when she was pissed as all hell, a look that clearly said he needed to shut up if he wanted to keep his testicles intact.

Like my father, Dean responded with a slack jaw, opening and closing his mouth in surprise and confusion. His resolve, although still strong, was withering.

 I nodded toward his vacated stool. He sat and shot me an angry glance, trying (and failing) to mask his nerves.

I took a deep breath in an attempt to calm my nerves. I stretched my fingers, feeling my joints pop after being balled into tight fists for god know how long. With a sigh, I locked eyes with Dean once more, his narrowed and wary.

"You know full well I had to leave, Dean." I snapped. "If I hadn't left, I guarantee you would have eventually sent me home, thinking my pack could help. Don't act pissy with me for doing what I felt was right."

Dean glowered and his nostrils flared. "Having a reason doesn't change that fact that you left without a word-"

"- If I had told you I was leaving, would you have asked me to stay?"

"Of course, I would have!" he hissed and leaned forward. "Whether you like it or not, you're part of this family now. I'm not going to just let my family walk out on me like that."

"That's the problem, Dean!" I argued. "I know that, if you had asked, I would have stayed! Sam wouldn't have asked, he would accept my decision and move past it, because he’s made that decision before for himself! You though, you would have gotten so caught up in your familial ideas that I wouldn't have been able to leave!"

"What's so wrong about staying with us!? About staying with me!?" he shouted back, a snarl set on his features. My eyes widened and he followed suit, realizing just what he had said.

"Dean, I had to leave," I uttered quietly. "For the second time in my life, I royally fucked up. I needed- need to get back on the same page. You know that feeling better than most."

"Why are you risking it?" he grumbled. I smiled weakly.

"Because you're my family too, Dean. Whether you like it or not, you're part of my pack now. You're family," I answered quietly. His own eyes softened. "Are you still mad at me?" I inquired with a nervous smile.

"Hell yeah, I'm still mad," he grunted. "But yeah... I get it. Wish I didn't, it would make staying mad at you a hell of a lot easier."

My nervous smile grew to a true grin, the gold fading from my eyes. My wolf scoffed and sat back on her haunches, melting into the background of my thoughts.

My human side had won yet again.

"Don't think you're off the hook," Dean huffed and stood from his stool. "You've got a lot of work to do to make it up to me, Scooby."

"Would pie be a good first step?" I teased, standing up with him.

His expression softened slightly. The harsh lines of his scowl faded and the corners of his mouth dipped down in a frown. His brows pinched inward, hiding slight surprise. “It’s a start.”

—

Unlike his brother, Sam was happy to see me. I practically threw myself at him when I saw him in the motel room. Dean sulked and ate his pie while Sam and I caught up, discussing hunts and my own journey.

"Wait, so what do you mean you can't change shape?" Sam said, raising a forkful of pie to his mouth. "Isn't that, like, literally part of being... you?"

"Kind of," I uttered through my own forkful. "It's a mental barrier. Sometimes I can get it… close, sometimes I can't. The times that I can take multiple tries and usually it's kind of painful. Hurts my joints."

"What kind of mental barrier? Like a trauma barrier or you just don't want to?"

I huffed and reached for another bite of my slice. "I don't know. It's... it's like my mind knows I won't always be able to control what I do in that form. It's like a piece of me is trying to keep that instinctive part of me tied down."

I heard a snort from behind me and spun to face Dean, who was sitting at a little table under the window next to the door. "Why're you talking like it's two separate people? It's still you, right?"

I exhaled softly, choosing my words carefully when I spoke up. "Yeah, it's still me, but it's a side of me that I'm not very... in touch with. I haven't been in a long time."

"So your wolf is that instinctive part of you that you're keeping 'tied down'?" Sam inquired. I nodded.

"I think so. And she's been a lot rowdier since Minnesota. Over the years I've just... made a habit of keeping her chained down so that I don't have any screw-ups."

"And yet," snapped Dean, "you still didn't have a strong enough grip on her." He shoved a large bite of pie into his mouth and chewed, his jaw tensing. I practically wilted and stared down at my feet that were stretched out in front of me. His opinion on the matter had changed so drastically since before I left.

"Dean!" Sam hissed. "I know you're pissed, but you don't need to be an ass-"

"It's fine, Sam," I uttered. "He's not wrong." I huffed and brushed a hair out of my face. "I know it's not an excuse but... when my pack is involved, I just lose control. I'm going to keep working on it," I sighed. "I've never had a pack before – never wanted one – so, it's all so new to me. And now I have to worry about six skinwalkers and two humans that have somehow wormed their way into my family-" Dean winced. "- I've got to worry about my self-control and make sure I don't kill anyone, I have to figure out these damn whispers, and-"

"Hold up," said Sam, throwing up a halting hand. "What whispers?"

I paled. I hadn't meant to let that slip out. I didn't want the brothers to worry about whatever weird-ass whispers I had been hearing - I knew that they'd get fixated on figuring it out and potentially killing whatever it was. They didn't have the time or resources to help me with that -- hell, I didn't even know if it was actually a living thing talking to me. For all I knew, some celestial entity was trying to give me advice. At worst, I was going nuts.

"I- uh," I stuttered over my words. I jumped as Dean stood, tossing his paper plate in a trash can and sitting on the bed beside Sam. I refused to turn to him and continued staring at my feet and my place on the floor. "I've just been hearing these weird whispers. It's nothing too crazy-"

"Whispers are pretty frickin’ crazy,” Dean remarked firmly. I frowned. "Keep talking."

"There's not much to tell, Dean," I snapped, twisting to face him with a scowl. "I just hear this whisper. When I try to follow it, it... it shows me things."

"It shows you things?" Sam asked, wrinkling his nose in confusion.

"Yeah," I sighed. "Like, I was chasing it when I met Marcus and Caeden. I just... followed the whisper and it led me to them. And with Calliope, it was... it wasn't whispering. It was screaming, frantic. It made me frantic. It knew she was in danger and it took me to her."

Dean swore under his breath. "How long have you been hearing these things? What are they saying to you?"

I scrunched my brows in thought. "It's been about three months I think? Maybe a little more?" Dean scoffed.

"And you're only telling us about this now?"

"Well, what was I supposed to say!?" I snarled back. "'Oh hey Dean, just wanted to let you know that I might be going a bit crazy, cause this voice I know literally nothing about it talking to me'!?"

"Yes!" he exclaimed, throwing his arms in the air. "That is exactly what you tell us! And then we help you figure out whatever the hell it is and maybe kill it!"

I huffed and turned away from him, crossing my arms over my chest. "I don't think it needs to be killed."

"What?" Dean growled and leaned forward, "What if it leads you into danger huh? What if it drags you into something you can't handle!?"

I whipped around to glare at him. "Would you even care, Dean? Last I checked, you didn't want me around anyway."

"Guys," Sam silenced us with a warning tone, snapping out of his deep thoughts. "Quit going at each other's throats, it's pointless."

"She wouldn't go for the throat, Sammy," Dean growled, balling his hands into fists, "She'd go for the heart."

"If you don't shut the hell up I will beat the shit out of you," I hissed back.

"I'd like to see you try," he snapped back.

"Would you two just shut up!" Sam snapped and glared at the both of us like he was ready to maim. "We've got bigger problems than you dumbasses not getting along." Dean and I fell silent, dropping our harsh gazes from one another and onto the floor. I could practically feel Dean's blood boiling - he was seething. I was too. I hated the way he was talking to me, treating me. Sam placed his hands on his face, dragging them down languorously, and sighed out of frustration. I perked up as he said my name. "What are the whispers saying to you?"

I hummed in thought. "Things like 'come', mostly," Dean snorted and I glared at him. "Last time it said 'see' and 'go'. Pretty much as soon as I realized something was wrong it changed what it was saying."

"Is it always only one word?"

"Yeah, one word at a time. Usually, there's a long pause and then it says something else. Last time... last time it was screaming so loud that it felt like it was clawing inside my skull," I mused for a second, mulling it over. "Pretty much every other time it's been like an existential thing like I was chasing someone just ahead of me. That time it felt like it was... pushing me, almost. Like it was urging me forward instead of urging me to chase."

Sam ruminated for a few moments, looking puzzled. Finally, he turned to Dean and muttered, "What do you think? Have you seen anything like that in dad's journal?"

Dean shook his head and fiddled with the odd-looking charm hanging around his neck. "No, I haven't. Honestly, sounds like a possession of some sort," his words faded into deep thought. His eyes rose to meet mine. "Can skinwalkers even get possessed?"

"Not that I know of. To my knowledge, you have to have a soul to get possessed."

Sam's eyes widened and he leaned forward with interest. "You don't have a soul?"

I shook my head. "Don’t think so. My dad told me it's why we don't go to heaven or hell when we die."

Dean quirked a brow. "Then where do you go? And how did he know?"

I shrugged. "For all I know there's nothing after death for monsters. It's just... over..." my shoulders slumped. I had always hoped that my father was wrong, that maybe there was something, anything after death. I didn't want it to just be over.

"Well, if it's not possession," Dean grumbled and leaned back on his hands, "maybe it's a demon?"

"Dean, why would a demon be talking to her?" Sam countered. "It's not like she can sell her soul."

I frowned. "What if it's not anything bad? What if it's, like, her? Instinct? Maybe I just subconsciously know when something is wrong with the pack?"

"No," Sam stated. "It can't be that. You said it led you to Marcus and Caeden? They weren't part of your pack at the time. Unless your instinct latches on to potential pack members nearby, I don't think that's it."

“Well if it were that, it would have led me to Sasha, Booth, and Andrew long before you guys rolled into town.”

“Unless they were the catalyst that sent your… pack honing abilities into overdrive?” Dean offered. 

"Whatever the reason is for it talking to me-" I started, referring back to Sam's previous statement, "- as long as the thing stays out of my way, I don't care what it says or leads me to."

Sam chuckled. "Fair enough. We can figure out our game plan for dealing with this thing later." The younger brother yawned, covering his mouth with his hand.

"We?" I questioned teasingly. "I don't remember agreeing to that."

Dean huffed and stood from Sam's bed and marched toward his own. He flopped onto the bed, landing on his back and locking his eyes with the ceiling. "Damn right this is a 'we' operation. No way in hell are we letting you figure this out on your own."

I chuckled dryly. “Doesn’t sound like you’re mad at me anymore.”

He scoffed. "Sure, soon we'll be frolicking in a meadow full of flowers together."

Sam chuckled with me as he rummaged through his bag, hunting for a toothbrush within it and setting out a set of clothes for the following day. "Alright, you two," he said, "we've got a hunt tomorrow, so enough talking."

I quirked a brow, my grin falling away. "We've got a hunt?"

Sam nodded and hummed in response. "Murder in Chicago."

I barked out a laugh. "Yeah, like that's uncommon for Chicago." A rustling caught my attention and I turned to see Dean rummaging through his own luggage.

Sam smirked down at his bag and turned to face me, toothbrush in hand. "This is the second one in two months. Two people found dead in their apartments, no sign of forced entry."

My brows rose in surprise. "Spirit maybe?"

Dean huffed. "We were thinking a cursed object. No way a spirit could move between houses like that." I nodded in agreement. I wasn't exactly knowledgeable on all the spiritual aspects of the supernatural world – ask me anything about certain monsters, and I could answer more than most hunters. But ghosts, psychics, witches... those were all foreign. Hell, I had only heard stories about psychics before meeting Missouri Moseley.

"We'll find out what it is soon," interjected Sam, always the mother of the group. "Just get to sleep - especially you, Dean, since you'll be driving tomorrow."

Dean grumbled something under his breath and flopped back onto his bed, crossing his arms over his chest and closing his eyes. I grinned and made my way toward a rather large armchair in the corner of the room. I dragged a cushion off the chair and motioned for Sam to toss me a pillow. To my delight, he tossed two and a heavy blanket that had been folded and lain across the end of the bed.

After putting together my relatively comfortable nest, Sam turned out the light and the sound of peaceful snores filled the room.

—

The Impala rolled to a halt on the side of the packed road and Dean expertly parked against the curb. Sam sighed and ruffled his hair, scanning the newspaper seated in his lap.

I leaned forward and gazed out the front window at the apartment building before us. The room was somewhere on the third floor. I fiddled with the hem of my costume and followed the brothers out of the car, my eyes following Dean as he moved toward the trunk and withdrew a toolbox. He had hardly said anything to me since the night I got back. The most he would do is give me the necessary information for the case or give me a clipped answer to a question.

I missed bantering with him. I didn't like this odd silent treatment I was receiving from him. It put me in a bad mood every time he gave me a brief answer or even none at all. I wanted nothing more than to scream at him to get over himself and just forgive me already.

"You know," Dean started as he paced down the sidewalk toward where Sam and I were standing, "I've gotta say, dad and me did just fine without these stupid costumes. I feel like a high school drama dork." He grinned and swung his toolbox lazily at his side. "What was that play you did?" he asked Sam, a smirk dawning on his features. He stumbled for a moment, struggling to remember the name. "What was it - ‘Our Town’? Yeah, you were good, it was cute."

Sam scoffed and a blush tinged his ears and cheeks. I chuckled, punching him teasingly in the shoulder. "You never told me you were in a play, Sam."

He chuckled nervously and turned his head to me. "It was a long time ago, and I really didn't have a big part. I was a background character."

"Main character in my heart," Dean teased. Sam rolled his eyes.

"But honestly, Dean. This getup helps us look the part. Do you want to pull this off or not?" Sam quickly changed the subject.

"I'm just saying, these outfits cost hard-earned money."

"Whose?" I countered and glared teasingly.

"Ours. You think credit card fraud is easy?"

It didn't take us long to reach the third floor and the door of the victim. The landlady grumbled and fumbled with the keys before pushing the white door open to let us in.

"Thanks for letting us look around," Sam said to her politely. Dean and I paced around the hallway, him fumbling with the alarm system while I checked for any signs of forced entry on the door.

"Well, the police said they were done with the place, so..." she trailed off and sauntered into the room with Sam close behind. I shut the door and quirked an eyebrow at the severed chain lock. I caught Dean's attention and nodded toward it, holding the two ends of the golden chain delicately. Dean frowned and turned to follow the landlady and his brother. "You said you're with the alarm company, right?" the older woman asked and spun to face the brothers.

"That's right," answered Dean, flashing his most sincere smile. It looked more like a grimace, in all honesty. He really wasn't that good at the acting part of this job.

The woman huffed wearily in response. "Well, no offense, but your alarm's about as useful as boobs on a man." I choked down laughter and covered my mouth with a hand. She leaned around the boys to cast me a sly grin.

Dean cleared his throat and flashed his own tentative grin. "Well, that's why we're here. To make sure it never happens again." The woman nodded and stepped aside to allow us to peruse the apartment.

"You found the body, right?" I asked, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. She nodded and swallowed dryly. "Were there any signs of a forced entry?"

"Any windows open?" Sam asked. "Was the alarm still active?"

"Windows were locked, front door was bolted. We had to cut the chain to get in here," she grouched in response. Dean frowned – that chain was the only lead we had. We were back to square one.

"Did you find her right after it happened?" Dean asked, referencing the girl who had been killed. The landlady shook her head.

"No, a few days later. Her work called and said they hadn't seen her in a while. I knocked on her door. That's when I noticed... the smell," she wrinkled her nose in disgust at the memory.

"And what condition was she in?" Dean pressed. The landlady huffed and glared at him.

"Meredith was all over the place, in pieces. I tell you, the guy who did it must have been a whack job. If I didn't know any better, I would have said it was an animal attack." The brothers looked first at each other and then Sam's eyes met mine. My brows furrowed. What could possibly have shredded her like that?

Sam's eyes flitted toward the woman. "Ma'am, do you mind if we take some time and give this place a once over?"

The landlady shrugged in response. "Go right ahead, knock yourself out." My eyes followed her as she walked out of the apartment, waiting for the door to latch before giving the go-ahead to speak.

"So a killer walks in and out of the apartment, no weapons, no prints, nothing..." Dean grumbled, trailing off as he rifled through his toolbox. I hummed quietly in response.

"There's got to be a trace of something here, some sort of clue. There's no way something could have killed her and not left a trail," I said, tracing a few fingers lazily over the large spots of blood.

"I'm telling you, the minute I saw the article I knew this was our kind of gig," Sam said, inspecting the windows. He jumped when Dean's EMF meter went off.

"I think I agree with you," Dean answered as he held up the box to show off the number of lights indicating supernatural presence.

"Did you ever talk to the cops yesterday?" I asked him.

Dean nodded and stood from his crouch position on the once white carpet. "Oh, yeah," he said, smirking. "I talked to Amy, a, uh, charming, perky officer of the law." I rolled my eyes.

"What'd you find out?" Sam pressed. I flashed him a quick glare which he looked rather confused by.

"Well, she's a Sagittarius, loves tequila - I mean, wow," Dean sighed almost wistfully, "Oh! And she's got this little tattoo-"

"Jesus, Dean!" I snapped. "Not about your hook-up, about the case!"

Dean grumbled something I didn't catch. I glared at the back of his head, almost wishing I could bore holes into it. "Nothing we don't already know," he carped. "Except for one thing they're keeping out of the papers."

"Enough with the suspense, Dean," I said. At this point, I just wanted this case to be over. I already was not a fan of Chicago.

"You're no fun," he sighed. "Meredith's heart was missing."

Sam and I both jumped to attention, whirling on Dean with twin, wide-eyed stares.

"Her heart? What do you think did it to her?" Sam inquired.

"Landlady said it looked like an animal attack. Maybe a werewolf?"

I barked out a laugh. "No way it was a werewolf. Moon cycle isn't right, and even if it was, I'd smell it. They reek, like the worst combination of rotten meat and cigarettes." I scrunched my nose at the thought. "My money's on a spirit. If it was a monster, I guarantee they would have left some trace other than blood."

"Yeah..." Dean mused thoughtfully. His eyes scanned the patches of blood, drawing a pattern in his mind. "Sammy, see if you can find a roll of tape."

Sam dug through his brother's toolbox as I went to stand beside Dean. "Notice something?"

"Maybe," he offered, holding his hands up to catch the roll of tape Sam had tossed his way. "We'll see in just a minute."

Dean got to work, connecting the patches of blood in a pattern I had never seen before. Hell, I wouldn't have even thought it would make a pattern like that. I chuckled morbidly, thinking that whatever killed Meredith must have been some sort of abstract artist - first the body, now the blood.

Dean stood and surveyed his work, crossing his arms. Sam moved to stand beside him, a puzzled look on his features.

"You ever seen a symbol like that?" Sam inquired, eyes following the sharp corners of the z-like symbol.

"Never," Dean responded curtly.

"Me neither."

—

"He could at least be helping us, Sam," I grumbled, flipping through the worn pages of their father's journal. "Instead of off doing- whatever it is with that poor bartender."

Sam snickered. "He is helping. Meredith worked here, so the bartenders are bound to know her."

"There's a distinct difference between helping us with the case and flirting with some painted bimbo, who we all know he is never going to call," I muttered, resting my chin in the palm of my hand as my eyes lazily scanned the page.

Sam opened his mouth to retort and quickly shut it, seeing Dean make his way back over. My gaze moved quickly toward him and fell right back to the paper. Honestly, the journal was a hell of a lot more interesting than anything Dean had to say.

John was incredibly thorough – he rivaled my uncle, who had always been compulsive and meticulous about his case notes. The journal might look like a mess of pages and hastily scrawled notations, but to me, it showed his dedication.

I flipped another page slowly, tuning out the brothers' conversation. My finger dragged along each line of writing with my eye following closely behind. My eyes fell on a string of numbers and my finger stopped its movement. I exhaled shakily.

I knew those numbers.

"Hey, Sam!" Dean called out, a tight grip on his beer. "Where are you going?"

I lifted my head, staring with a glazed look after Sam as he marched away from the table. Dean turned his confused eyes on me before standing and following his brother.

I looked back at the page, my finger running haphazardly over the string of digits. Why would John have his number..? I tightened my jaw and marked the page so I could find it later and shut the little book, tucking it under my arm and following the brothers. My eyes widened as I noticed Sam talking to a blonde girl, giving her a tense hug. My ears tuned in to their conversation as I stalked up behind Dean.

"Anyway, the whole scene got old, so I'm living here for a while," the girl said, fluttering her lashes at Sam. I took a deep breath, ready to interject, and coughed, gagging on air. God, this girl was drenched in perfume, it was blocking all of my other senses.

Dean cleared his throat and patted me lightly on the back. I brushed his hand away and took shallow breaths.

"You're from Chicago?" Sam asked.

"No, Massachusetts – Andover," the girl said with a giggle. "Gosh, Sam, what are the odds we'd run into each other?"

"Yeah, I know, I thought I'd never see you again." Although his back was turned to me, I could tell he was puzzled. It must have been written all over his features.

"Well, I'm glad you were wrong..." she trailed off and gazed up at Sam from under her lashes. I rolled my eyes. Dean cleared his throat and the girl's eyes snapped to his, a disgusted glare rising on her features. "Dude, cover your mouth."

Dean looked shocked and I suppressed a laugh, for fear of inhaling more of her sharp perfume. God, the girl must have bathed in the stuff. Did the boys really not smell it?

"Yeah, um, I'm sorry, Meg. This is, uh—this is my brother, Dean," Sam said, scratching the back of his head. The girl, Meg, looked surprised.

"Oh! This is Dean?" she confirmed. Sam nodded and Dean smirked at her.

"So you've heard of me," Dean mused, attempting to be smooth. Now it was Meg's turn to roll her eyes.

"Yeah, I've heard of you," she snapped. "Real nice, how you treat your brother like luggage." Dean’s eyes widened and I stared at Meg in shock. When did Sam even have time to meet this girl without Dean knowing? "Why don't you let him do what he wants?" she continued, spite lacing her words. "Quit dragging him all over God's green earth-"

Sam held up his hands in a silent plea to make her stop. "Meg, it's fine, really, we're fine." The three of them stood there awkwardly, Meg surveying the two, glaring at Dean with contempt and at Sam with an almost overprotective gaze. Her eyes skirted over me, likely because I hadn't been introduced.

I cleared my throat. "I'm, uh- I'm going to get a drink. You want to come with me, Dean?"

"Yeah- yeah," he said, already moving toward the bar. I flashed a sheepish grin toward Sam and Meg, waving goodbye and running to catch up with the elder Winchester. "Damn, that was awkward."

I sat on one of the bar stools, placing John's journal on the counter and running a finger over the spine. "So... when did she and Sam first meet."

Dean scoffed. "Probably after our first real hunt with you, in Kansas. He and I got into a spat and he left for a few days."

I glared at him, clenching my fist and resting it on the counter. "And you didn't think to tell me?"

"Well, we weren't exactly super close then. It was kind of a family matter, not something for you to stick your snout into."

"You are family, Dean," I hissed. "I have a right to know when these things happen."

He frowned and rested his hands on his lap. We sat in silence for a few minutes, long enough for Dean to get another beer from the bartender and have about a third of it.

"Listen, I-" he started. I cut him off, flipping open his father's journal to my marked page.

"Dean, I found something in the journal earlier, when you first came back to the table." He opened his mouth like he wanted to say something and shut it when I cast him a warning glare. Whatever he wanted to say, I really wasn't in the mood for it. He looked toward his lap bashfully and then his eyes rose to face mine, his jaw tightening.

"Anything relevant to the case?" he asked.

"No," I answered quickly. "But look at this," I slid the journal toward him, highlighting the phone number at the bottom of the page. His eyes flickered toward mine and he raised a brow in confusion. "I recognize this number, Dean. It's-"

"Hey!" called Sam, sauntering back toward us with his cell phone in hand. "You guys ready to head out."

Dean turned to face me, a promise being held in his green eyes. "We'll get back to this later." He stood abruptly, grabbing his jacket from the back of his chair and following Sam toward the door.

I groaned and dropped my head dramatically on the open journal. "Sure we will..." I muttered to myself. I stood, slamming the journal shut a little more roughly than I intended, and followed the brothers out the door.

"No, man, I mean like our kind of strange," I heard Sam say as I rushed to catch up with the brothers. "Like, maybe even a lead."

"What makes you say that?" Dean probed, sparing me a glance as I jogged up to him.

"I met Meg weeks ago, literally on the side of the road. And now, I run into her in some random Chicago bar? I mean, the same bar where a waitress was slaughtered by something supernatural? You don't think that's a little weird?"

Oh. They were still talking about her.

"I don't know," Dean said with a dramatic sigh. "Random coincidence? It happens."

"Yeah, it happens, but not to us. Look, I could be wrong-"

"Dean," I interrupted Sam. "I think maybe Sam's right. There's something off about her. I mean, did you not smell the buckets of perfume on her? Had me gagging within ten feet of her."

"Perfume doesn't make someone a murder suspect," Dean countered.

"It does if it causes me to choke and die."

"Well, then it's a good thing you're not dead, right?"

"-I'm just saying that there's something about this girl that I can't quite put my finger on," Sam added to his unfinished sentence.

"I bet you'd like to. I mean, maybe she's not a suspect, maybe you've got a thing for her, huh?" he chuckled and nudged Sam with his shoulder. "Maybe you're thinkin' a little too much with your upstairs brain, huh?"

Sam rolled his eyes as we stopped on the side of the road, waiting for the go-ahead to walk. "Do me a favor. Check and see if there's really a Meg Masters from Andover, Massachusetts, and see if you can't dig anything up on that symbol on Meredith's floor." Sam marched away from Dean and I before his brother could protest.

"What are you going to do?" Dean asked as he ran to catch up.

"I'm going to watch Meg."

Dean laughed and clapped Sam on the back. "Yeah, you are!"

Sam grimaced and shrugged Dean's hand off his shoulder. "I just want to see what's what. Better safe than sorry."

The two bickered, Dean teasing Sam, and Sam arguing. I stopped on the sidewalk, watching the brothers make their way toward the Impala, Sam fishing the keys out of his pocket.

I glanced down at the heavy, leather-bound journal in my hands. Something about this case didn't add up. First the weird symbol, and now Meg showing up? Something was wrong, I could feel it. She was hiding something.

Dean called my name from his spot beside the passenger door and I perked up immediately. "You coming or not?"

I nodded and shoved the journal under my arm and crossed the street to where the boys were waiting.

#ugh here comes john winchester #supernatural #spn #dean winchester #sam winchester #dean winchester fic #dean winchester x reader #x reader #female reader #cross posted on wattpad #cross posted on ao3 #supernatural fanfiction #monster reader #monster #original characters #original monster characters #fluff #angst #slow burn

[intothecometverse]

in honor of february ending, here's what i manifested this month!

🐬 this one time i was practicing a bit later than usual and i was like FUCK ION WANNA EAT DINNER AND THEN GO TO ORCHESTRA REHEARSAL WITHIN HALF AN HOUR THAT'S NOT ENOUGH TIME and then i got an email for the rehearsal schedule and i got at least half an hour more than usual until i had to come. funny enough i was thinking to myself like plz don't make me come until later plz plz plz plz plz plz and then i got the email for the rehearsal schedule so yippe

🐬 going on to that i had to fucking take a shit and ended up arriving to the rehearsal room ON THE DOT (which is late for orchestra standards 💔) but luckily there were still ppl waiting outside while the conductor was dealing with the basses and cellos only (which was the reason why ppl who weren't basses and cellows didn't have to come until half an hour later) so i wasn't late woo! and on my walk there (i was speed walking lol) i was affirming to myself i'm not gonna be late im not gonna be late there are still gon' be ppl waiting outside then boom that happened??? like im god hello??

🐬 having dinner + getting to go on a mini walk with my goth sp (i asked them and they said yes)

🐬 also manifesting conversations with my goth sp just by thinking about experiencing it seconds beforehand

🐬 oh ja and i also manifested being released early from orchestra rehearsals thru just thinking abt it seconds before too 😭😭

🐬 manifested seeing another sp during my regular day activities (their dorm room is around the corner from mine so we see each other a lot xD) like whenever i think abt them boom they pop up 😭. manifesting interactions next 𓆩♡𓆪

🐬 (me personally i think this was my most putting-my-foot-down manifesting moment) i overate one time and felt like throwing up, like i was feeling ALL the symptoms i usually do before i throw up so i was like "I'm not gonna throw up im not gonna throw up, remember who's in control. I AM in control, nothing else! the 3d will conform, because i said so, IT'S GOING TO CONFORM, NOW" and then i felt fine, just like that :D

🐬 not needing to get out of bed and take a piss one night when i was rly tired (affirmed "i don't need to piss" until i fell asleep 😭)

🐬 my room being opened one night when i got locked out at like 1/2 am

🐬 my grade in jazz history being raised from a D to a B- (and hopefully an A by the end of the quarter)

🐬 also i have all As in all my other classes

🐬 getting to have a fun hangout before February ended lol

🐬 having friends my age who live in dorms near me xD

🐬 my eczema getting healed without special ointment or anything

🐬 birf control (technically manifested it way back in December bc that was when i got a confirmed appointment but wtv. i got the implant this month so xD)

🐬 clearer skin

🐬 i have super long hair and the ends didn't dry out (technically this is like a continuous manifestation but i just wanted to mention it. basically I've been affirming "the ends of my hair is immune to split ends and drying out as it gets longer" and it worked!)

🐬 being better at trumpet :D (i told my trumpet teacher how much i practiced during one lesson, and continued to play during our lesson even when i surpassed my usual amount of time playing during an average day and he said I've gotten stronger due to playing for so long yet still sounding relatively fresh. and recently I've kept playing for longer amounts of time during the day and I've still been fine so yippe

what i'm looking for manifesting-wise in march:

🦞 shifting lmao

🦞 being successful in my job

🦞 being successful in all areas of life actually

🦞 getting to hang out with both sps + them getting along as friends so we could be a whole trio :3

🦞 my sps texting me first along with me texting them first (like yk how they say it should be like a 50/50 thing with who starts the convos and shit)

🦞 supernatural shit like powers, wings, horns, and like those king sombra kinda smoky eyes

🦞 WORLD. PEACE.

hope this inspired you, and remember, anything is possible, and u are loved!

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

#law of assumption #neville goddard sp #neville goddard #loa #manifesting #loassumption #affirm and persist #loablr #loa success

[coraniaid]

The more I think about it the more it feels like the Watcher's Council really should have been the big threat of Buffy's fourth season, rather than the Initiative.

I mean, think about the precedents:

The focus of Season 1 is on Buffy coming to terms with having to be the Slayer and what that means for the rest of her life, but this season also introduces the character of Angel and establishes that he is a vampire with a soul, a long history of violence and with strong personal connections to other vampires. It even raises the possiibility of Buffy having to kill him. And the conversation Buffy and her friends have towards the end of the episode, when she thinks Angel attacked her mother, pretty much foreshadows the main plot of the second half of Season 2:

Xander: "Buff, it's not your fault." Buffy: "No? I knew who he was, what he was, and didn't do anything about it. Because I had feelings for him, because I cared about him…" Willow: "if you care about somebody. you care about them. You can't change that by--" Buffy: "Killing them? Maybe not, but I think it's a start."

[Season 1's "Angel" foreshadows the plot of Season 2]

Then in Season 2, while the focus is on Angelus and Drusilla and Spike, the season also introduces a couple of things that will be incredibly important next season. Namely the fact that there's now a second active Slayer in the world -- and while Kendra never really gets a proper character arc of her own, Buffy's reaction to realizing she exists anticipates a lot of her reaction to meeting Faith -- and also the fact that Sunnydale's political establishment knows a lot more about the supernatural than they've been letting on:

Snyder: "This is getting out of hand. People will talk." Police chief: "You'll take care of it." Snyder: "I'm doing everything I can, but you people have to realize … we're on a Hellmouth. Pretty soon people are going to figure that out." Police chief: "The city council was told that you could handle this job. If you feel that you can't, perhaps you'd like to take that up … with the Mayor."

[Season 2's "I Only Have Eyes For You" foreshadows the plot of Season 3]

And then we get to Season 3, where yes, the Mayor and a rogue Slayer are the driving force of the plot. But this season also introduces for the first time the idea that Giles isn't just a Watcher, he's a (fairly junior!) member of a formal organization called the Watcher's Council. And we see that the Council are large and bureaucratic, that they know about demons and vampires but are prone to underestimate them, and that not only are their goals not always aligned with the Slayer but their leadership is personally at odds with her. We even see that the Council like to capture vampires (for tests!) rather than killing them. And Wesley gives us an idea of what life is like for those Watchers who don't have a Slayer to monitor:

Wesley: "Of course, training protocols have been updated quite a bit since your day. Much greater emphasis on field work." Giles: "Really?" Wesley: "Oh, yes. Not all books and theory nowadays. I have, in fact, faced two vampires myself. In controlled conditions, of course."

[Season 3's "Bad Girls" foreshadows …?]

And then the plot of Season 4 relies on the existence of exactly such an organization, "fighting a war" against demons and vampires without any Slayer involvement while being suspicious of and hostile toward Buffy and her friends. But for reason this organization is not the Council. It's ... a group we've never met or heard about before, who haven't been foreshadowed at all.

Wouldn't it just make so much more sense, internally, for the Council to start to place an even greater emphasis on 'field work' and send out its own agents to capture and study vampires as a result of Buffy quitting at the end of Season 3? Rather than the weird retcon that the Army have been running tests underneath the campus of Sunnydale U for months without anybody noticing, and somehow without finding out anything about the Slayer who lives directly on their doorsteps? Wouldn't Professor Walsh make a lot more sense as a character if she were a Watcher who knew all along that Buffy was the Slayer and didn't trust her because she'd quit the Council?

And we even see later (in this season's Who Are You?) that the Council has a paramilitary wing! Why does Season 4 need two separate pseudo-military organizations who hunt demons and run tests on vampires and don't like Buffy Summers?

#btvs

[amyyscorner]

Tumblr is a great platform. Sometimes.

Let me explain.

I've been active on tumblr for since 2015. I've seen communities come and go. I've lived through the porn, the ana blogs, every post having a supernatural gif in it's reblogs and through a lot of assholes.

Tumblr is able to bring communities together. While pages like Twitter exist purely to judge what people do, tumblr exists to create. It started out as a platform for blogging. And in one way or another it still is.

Now, I've been on the fanfiction side of this hellsite for quite a while now. But the uprise in hateful messages sent via anon are on an insane level, lately, that I do not remember experiencing before. During the last few years, so many creators have gotten unsayable things sent to them, that it often ended up with them disableing their accounts - never coming back.

I want everyone to understand something: If you send something into someones inbox, they will read it. They will see it. Even if they do not respond to it and don't post it. If you write something anonymously, then you have that power we love about the internet. Anonymity in its purest form.

Please consider the person on the other side of the screen. We are not celebrities with a PR-Team checking our comments for us. We read everything ourselves. We filter through messages ourselves. If you use someones shared pain against them, then you are causing incredible amounts of pain. A lot of us treat tumblr as a safe space. We smile about our favourite people, write little scenarios, make silly art and we yell out our thoughts. All of them. Good and bad. As creators we do not owe anyone anything, but ourselves. Please genuinely remember the person behind the screen. They're probably just like you. Some are on their way to school right now, others are just back from a night out drinking with their friends. Some haven't left their bed all day and others are hugging a parent. We are all incredibly unique people with unique experiences.

The next time you want to send a message anonymously, consider if it may be hurtful. You are here because you share an interest. Do you really want to cause harm to the person that just made you feel warm inside?

[half-hell]

INTRODUCTION.

KAL | uk, 20's, she/her.

ABOUT ME.

+ you can call me kal. + i live in the uk, i'm in my mid 20's, and i use she/her pronouns! + i am ask and tag game friendly -> i'm likely to be sporadically active, so it might take me a minute to answer sometimes. + i'm not new to tumblr, or writeblr really, but i've never managed to keep up with a blog for long. so here's to hoping this time sticks!

WHAT I WRITE.

+ new adult/adult. + third person and past tense, but i don't mind reading first person and other tenses every now and then. + since i live in the uk, most of my wip's are likely to be uk based. + i would say that my writing is more character driven than plot driven. + (low) fantasy, usually with lots of magic, sometimes with a variation of fantastical/mythical/supernatural creatures thrown into the mix and i always seem to find room to fit in a sword or two! -> also, most of my wip's are set modern world with a fantasy twist. because while i love world building, world building does not love me. + lgbtq+ main characters and romances. + characters with physical and mental disabilities. -> i'll always do my research and try to portray any disability i may write about as accurately as possible, but feel free to call me out if i've done something wrong! + found! family! + i hate with a capital H love triangles, so none of those here. only polyamory. + complicated family relationships. i love giving my babies all the traumas and issues. + i'm quite fond of characters who start out as assholes, but slowly, as the story goes on, reveal their soft and kind side. especially when they don't completely lose their asshole edge, either. they just don't use it against their people anymore. + sunshine x grumpy dynamic. especially when the aforementioned asshole character turns out to be the sunshine character, too. + enemies to friends and enemies (to friends) to lovers. + angst and hurt/comfort are my jam! + i do love a good bit of fluff, too. also, characters in established relationships being soft and domestic-y. will never get enough of that. + as much as i love putting my babies through it, i'm not really a fan of unhappy endings (they usually leave me crying and having an existential crisis for days). so, i probably won't be writing much, if any, of those.

CURRENT WIPS.

HALF AN HEIR | intro. characters. tag. pinterest. ↳ planning. third person, past tense. new adult/adult, (low) fantasy, found family, lgbtq+, romance, poly rep, enemies to friends, sunshine x grumpy, ptsd, grief. -> my first ever wip. my love. my baby. i started writing this when i was 15/16 and i haven't known a day of peace since. i will see it finished even if it's the last thing i do. -> currently in the process of re-working a lot of aspects, trying to make it a little more coherent and a lot less ya. so i don't really have a lot to give you right now. -> BUT, what we do have is: kylen emerson doesn't know just how powerful he is yet. being held captive and tortured by your (adopted) uncle will (un)surprisingly take your attention away from figuring out important key facts about yourself. after escaping and going on the run, he unintentionally gathers a found family, who, ignoring kylen's insistence that he can do it alone, tag along on his journey to take his uncle down and out, for good. -> also, this wip originally included werewolves, vampires, warlocks, etc. and while i'm undecided if i'm keeping this aspect, i can say with 100% certainty that there'll still definitely be lots of magic and lots and lots of swords involved.

UNTITLED | intro. characters. tag. pinterest. ↳ planning. third person, past tense. new adult/adult, (low) fantasy, found family, lgbtq+, romance, poly rep, enemies (to friends) to lovers, exes (to friends) to lovers, complicated family relationships, sunshine x grumpy (x sunshine), child abuse (past and present). -> i don't have a lot in terms of world building for this wip, and the plot is basically non-existent, except for the vaguest of idea's and that one scene that the whole wip is built around, but we do have vibes, characters, and lots of feelings about said characters! -> gabriel keller jr. is our asshole but hidden sunshine character, who's a lot stronger, and more powerful, than he's been led to believe. he has a rocky past and relationship with both his ex, ainsley- another sunshine character -and her current boyfriend, kade 'bram' bramwyll- a grumpy, but less grumpy for his people, character. but, having no one else to turn to, he's forced to ask them both for their help after finding himself in a sticky situation. they all, of course, however much they try to deny and fight it, fall in love along the way.

UNTITLED | intro. characters. tag. pinterest. ↳ brainstorming. third person, past tense. new adult/adult, (low) fantasy, found family, lgbtq+, romance, trans main character, friends to lovers. -> i have nothing for this wip right now other than vibes and the want to write something with an older, trans main character.

...and i will update with better, more eloquent wip intro's when i have things more figured out. eventually. at some point.

#writeblr #writing #writeblr intro #writeblr introduction #writers on tumblr #writing community

[streettealee]

Alright, because of the post I just reblogged off of you: Grace Blackthorn. I love her, too. If you were given free rein to write her character's story post-canon, what would you do with her given the confines of her existing ending? I personally think I would remove her from London altogether and send her to another Institute for a fresh start.

Grace. All right. There is a lot I'd want to rewrite about her direction if I could control canon, but alas, I can't and it wasn't the question.

As for post-canon, I would indeed remove her from London too. It's makes the most sense considering all the memories in London, many distressing, and the reminders of what she did in the past and what was done to her for those actions. I truly think anyone who gets locked up in the Silent City for any amount of time emerges with a slight shift of mind. Plus, while I doubt many of the remaining TLH cast would realistically stay in London their whole lives, I do think Grace would benefit more from a distance between herself and, at least, James and Cordelia.

I'm not sure which Institute I would think best for her to go. There's a decent amount of scientific innovation that goes on in France, but somehow I feel it's not the place Grace would want to be. I don't know how many men Tatiana pimped her out to, nor can I recall whom they were and where they were from, but I just feel like even the entirety of France and it's diverse areas would not quite be her scene for healing.

Because that's what I'd write for Grace post-canon. Healing. I want to see how she does not quite wrestle with guilt - because how can you feel bad for doing what you needed to survive? - but does struggle with the ghost of Christopher. It would hurt anyone pretty bad if the one person who unwaveringly stood by your side and cared about you when they did not have much reason to, who encouraged you to find that last piece to complete their life's work, just died. And died by the hands of your adoptive family, no less. This is one my nit picks because I wish we had seen Grace defeat Tatiana rather than Cordelia - it would have felt more significant, in my eyes. She had more emotional stake in it.

Anyway, I would send Grace perhaps to another Institute located in the UK, actually, or Ireland. I do not think she would be comfortable going to Idris, simply because while she is more open to the Shadowhunter identity, she would still have a lot of complicated feelings there and it'd be a lot more difficult to sort out when also living in the country where your orphanage was. And I also would not send her to America (sorry, I know, there was a fanfic where this happened and I fully respect it, it's just not what I would have done (I also know more about other countries than I do about America, so I'm more comfortable dealing with them)). Ultimately, while I'm thinking this out, I'm settling on Ireland because I think it feels removed enough for Grace to feel like she can breathe and, if all the stories are true, it's the centre of a lot of supernatural activity, especially involving Fair Folk.

I point this out because I think Grace is the kind of person who has to keep busy to keep going. I feel like she spent too much idle time as Tatiana's ward and wouldn't want to be reminded of that. I'd write about how she works the day investigating local Fair Folk issues involving mundanes and others (I think she also shares Kit's close ties to Downworld, if not so comfortably to begin with but gradually more so) and training, then goes for patrols every couple of nights or so, before letting herself relax, exhausted, before some fireplace and allowing herself to feel what she feels so she can eventually move on. She might still work with scientific invention, because she does indeed seem curious, but I think it'd be some time before she really got into it again.

Basically, I want to write Grace in grief for all she has lost, and taking the time to go through that and heal each wound in her, before we look at things like whether she ever has romantic interest again, who she befriends, whether she reconnects with anyone from the London Enclave, and so on. I think she might reach out to Lucie first (I would argue she still writes letters to Jesse anyway) just because of their potential for a decent friendship and their previous partnership. And I am always looking for f/f ships, so a little part of me wants Grace/Lucie, but considering canon Lucie/Jesse and how important that is - I'll leave it alone. Close female friendships are also brilliant and we do need more of them even in TSC.

But anyway, I think I've rambled long enough. Hopefully that was a satisfactory answer to your question. I really enjoyed thinking through this and sharing.

#grace blackthorn #tlh #the last hours #tsc #asks #send asks #post chain of thorns #post chot #chot spoilers

[endwersed]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by the fabulous @dear-massacre 😘

How many works do you have on ao3?

21 - it would be a lot higher, but I purged all but one of my old Destiel fics back in 2017. They weren't very good, so I can't say I really regret it 🤷‍♀️

What's your total ao3 word count?

319,994

What fandoms do you write for?

Now, just Teen Wolf 🐺

Top five fics by kudos:

Find Your Fire - Reddie (IT)

Clue(less) - Reddie (IT)

Nah, He Didn't - Destiel (Supernatural)

Worst Enemy - Reddie (IT)

as dear as a brother - Sterek (TW)

Do you respond to comments?

Embarrassingly, it's very hit and miss... I want to! I love and cherish every single comment I ever get! But I find the process of replying to comments bizarrely stressful, so sometimes it takes me... a while. And that while might be, like, years. Sorry!!

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I genuinely don't have anything with an angsty ending posted; I need my boys to be happy too badly for that. I guess I could say maybe striking out - just because it's not finished yet, and where it is in the story right now is angsty af!

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All of them have rom-com level happy endings lol. Maybe Clue(less) - it's a childhood friends-to-lovers soulmate AU, so it has all the sap that comes with those particular tropes wrapped up in there.

Do you get hate on fics?

I wouldn't call it hate, per se - but I guess my interpretation of Stiles is a bit harsher/more rough-edged than others I've seen, and some people don't vibe with that, so I get comments telling me they don't like Stiles in my story for XYZ reason.

To be clear - I also don't write Derek as a completely faultless, entirely perfect guy. I also have him do bad (arguably worse, in some fics) things. But for some reason, I don't ever really get the same kind of comments about him!

Do you write smut?

Like, almost exclusively at this point. It's like my brain can't come up with a story unless I'll get a chance to write them fucking nasty in it.

Craziest crossover:

None, they're not really my jam.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

omg yes! years ago! It was this Destiel HS AU I had posted on AO3 (since deleted because it was... not good) and someone posted it onto ff.net and claimed it was theirs. I can't remember if I ever was successful in getting it taken down.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't think so!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have not.

All time favourite ship?

All time is so hard... I do probably have to say Sterek. I shipped them intensely back in 2012, and I ship them even more intensely now. So - yeah. Probably them.

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Are we talking real WIP that I've actually made a meaningful dent in? Or just ideas I've put down to paper?

Because I have so many ideas, there isn't enough time to actually finish them all lol. But for fics I have actively started, I'm pretty confident I'll manage to muddle through to the end of all of them, even if it takes a little while.

What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue and smut, I think.

I tend to develop a scene around the dialogue - in that, it's the dialogue that will come to me first when I'm planning the outline, and I'll note it down for when I come around to writing the scene. Then it's mostly a case of refining that dialogue and building the scene with descriptions around it.

I also love smut as character study. It's not just about being horny for them. It's about being horny for their introspection, too.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I don't have the imagination to come up with some of the flowery prose I see and love from other people. I wish I did, but that's just not how my brain works unfortunately!

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I only really feel comfortable writing in languages I'm fluent in. For anything else, I think we all know Google Translate can't be trusted, so I just... avoid it.

First fandom you wrote in?

Harry Potter! Wolfstar all the way back on ff.net <3

Favorite fic you've written?

Oh god, this is hard. Let's go with a Teen Wolf fic, because they're the nearest and dearest to my heart right now.

I think I'd say feels so good inside. It was so much fun to write, and I just love loss of virginity fics so damn much.

-

Open tag to anyone who wants a go!

#my fic #not sure who's already been tagged soooo open to anyone!! #this was fun <3

[theheightofdishonor]

ugh that ask really did have me thinking about the sheriff and how much i cannot stand that man.

like i'm generally very very lenient with characters that only care about one or a couple people. especially when the people they care for are ones that i also care for like stiles in this instance. but with sheriff stilinski, i just can not. It's a mixture of

a) the hypocrisy

b) that he's leveraging the law against characters I like (listen, if he was throwing peter into a prison cell, that's one thing. but it's not, it's kira.)

c) the whole white male cop that actively abbets his white male son's multiple crimes while crucifying everyone else thing is too close to reality for me.

and d) as an extension of the above, the way that teen wolf gives him a leniency that it doesn't allow any of the other parents in the narrative because of the color of his skin and his gender. And mind you, I tend to stay out of conversations around fandom racism because i don't come here to reflect on how fandom and media are extensions of issues i face irl. However in certain instances like this, it's impossible to avoid discussing that sheriff stilinski is given grace by the narrative. The way that he (and Chris) are allowed to single-mindedly protect his son and not be condemned by the narrative when Victoria and Lydia's mom are both seen as wrong for it, when Noshiko is needlessly rendered powerless. It's how we get to see Melissa care about Stiles as her own time and time again and Stilinski never extends that concern to Scott, or Lydia, or any of Stiles's friends or even Melissa who's his friend. The sheriff is allowed to take unsavory actions to protect his own but Noshiko and Ken, who have been fully informed about the supernatural world for ages, one of whom is a nine tailed kitsune, isn't allowed to do so. It's the same way that we never get insights into Boyd or Erica or Mason's families but we learn about Isaac's father. How we get an entire season of Argent family history and tons about the Hales and nothing about the McCalls. It's about how the dream sequence gave us meaningful looks into Lydia and Stiles's families and then that random thing with Roxy for Scott when the circumstances around Rafael leaving was right there for the picking, and just as important to his character as Stiles's or Lydia's mothers were to them (-don't argue with me about this, i understand that a lot of you have have analyzed that scene to hell and back and rendered some meaning out of it and while i appreciate the effort, we simply disagree on this scene)

Anyway I just wanted to rant a little bit because that ask had me thinking about it. And now i'd rather not think about it so I might just mute the notifs on that ask.

Ofc if you like stilinski, good for you, i really don't care, don't come into my inbox about it, please and thank you.

#teen wolf #anti sheriff stilinski #i apologize in advance if you came across this in his tags and didn't want to #however i do like keeping my original posts tagged