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damien-mlm · 2 years

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Keeping Myself Alive

Tags and warnings!!! RE Gameverse, Carlos Oliveira/Transmasc!OC, Established Platonic Relationship with Jill, Childhood Friends, Carlos Oliveira, Jill Valentine, Nicholai Ginovaef | Nikolai Zinoviev, Tyrell Patrick, Mikhail Victor, Nemesis, OC, Angst, Hospitalization, C-PTSD, Injury Description, Gore, Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, Self-Harm, Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Fluff, Smut (eventually), Explicit.

Chapter 5: Betrayal

Read on AO3

(4500 words approx.)

Previous Chapter - First Chapter

Nicholai watched, alone, from the security of the train car he had detached, as the rest of the subway continued onwards. He waited a few moments, then pressed the button of the detonator, sending all the survivors, along with Mikhail, straight into the fiery pits of hell.

He contemplated the mess of flames, twisted metal and debris in front of him for a long minute, like an artist contemplating a completed masterpiece, then turned around and walked along the tracks, back to the station. He strolled calmly in silence for a while, until his device beeped.

He took it out of his pocket and pressed a button, answering the call.

“Dr. Flint, I’ve gotten rid of most of the witnesses, just as you asked” – Nicholai said, casually.

“So, I take it that earthquake was the explosion, then? Good.” – Nathaniel started – “Is the rescue team on their way here? I’m having trouble keeping the infected out of reach.”

“Don’t worry, Doctor. They are on their way” – Nicholai answered.

“Good…” – Nathaniel said, pausing for a second – “What about the other arrangement?” – Nicholai smiled and held back a small chuckle.

“Well, he is alive, though that is of no surprise to anybody. He has managed to keep most of his abilities secret, either that or, he has forgotten how to use them.” – Nicholai explained, Nathaniel shook his head before answering.

“No, we made sure he had his condition present in mind, he must be hiding….” – he stated – “And his location?”

“He is on his way to you, actually. Along with your rescue team.” – Nicholai said with a wicked smile on his face.

“What?! No, that’s unacceptable! There’s no telling how he will react!” – Nathaniel panicked, his loud voice alerting the undead just outside the office he was hiding in – “Listen, you have to get me out of here safely! I’m the only one who-” – but Nicholai pressed a button to end the call, then silenced the device completely.

“I’m sorry, Doctor” – he said, mockingly – “A better deal has been arranged”.

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Gentle sunlight streamed in through the window, shining on Liam’s face, forcing him to wake up. Jill wasn’t around, and this made his heart sink, as he remembered what happened the night before, he wanted to come clean about what was going on, but just didn’t know how. Or where to start, even.

He got distracted from his thoughts when he heard a low hum, making him look down, his sight surprising him.

At some point during the night, Carlos had fallen over onto him, and now had his head rested on Liam’s lap, sound asleep.

Liam felt a warmth in his chest as he looked at Carlos sleep so peacefully, he couldn’t help but to run his fingers through the other man’s hair gently.

‘It’s so soft…’

Carlos sucked in a breath as he awoke, quickly rising back up and away from Liam as he realized of his position. Liam lifted his hands up.

“I’m sorry-” – they both said simultaneously. After a second or of silence Liam continued to speak.

“I didn’t mean to wake you up, sorry about that…” – Carlos rubbed his eyes as he tried to shake off the grogginess, as well as the embarrassment.

“It’s okay. I’m sorry I used you as a pillow” – he said quietly. Liam smiled softly at him.

“Oh, don’t worry about it, you were asleep.” – he said, then tilted his head slightly, trying to hide the blush that crept up his face.

They sat in silence for a few moments, not knowing what to say or do with themselves. For a second, the both of them opened their mouths again, as if to say something, but were interrupted by the door opening.

“Morning, sleepyheads!” – Jill walked in, a backpack hanging from her left shoulder. Both men whipped their heads at her, as if they were caught doing something, making Jill raise an eyebrow at them. – “Did, uh… Did I interrupt something? I can leave for a while if you want-” – she said, pointing her thumb at the door behind her. But both men quickly interrupted her.

“No no no no!” – they said in unison. Jill raised her chin and made a face at them, clearly amused, then slowly walked up to them and sat on the floor near them, setting the backpack in front of her before opening it.

“Well, I went out to that big donut shop around to get breakfast, and I made a quick stop at the armory on my way back” – she said, taking a paper bag filled with greasy day-old donuts and placing it on the ground for them to dig into – “No coffee, though, sorry about that” – She said jokingly as she took a few small bottles of water out of the backpack then grabbed a donut out of the bag and bit into it.

The men followed her lead and started to show down on the slightly stale donuts, it wasn’t the tastiest, nor the most nutritious breakfast ever, but it was food, and they needed the sugar to give them energy for the day.

Liam saw a small glint of light shine from the backpack, then took a peek inside, Jill side-eyeing him quietly.

Liam’s brows arched up and his eyes widened as he pulled out a shiny metal bat out of the backpack, then looked at Jill with glee, like a child on Christmas. Jill laughed at his expression.

“Okay” – she started – “I may or may not have had a few other stops around town before coming back here” – she said with a smile – “You lost your axe last night, I figured you needed something to defend yourself out there, and since u don’t like guns…” – she gestured at the bat in Liam’s hands. – “I got you a new toy!”

Carlos laughed quietly at the exchange, then peeked in the backpack, noticing several boxes of ammo, enough for both the gun-wielders to shoot at the flesh-eaters at their hearts content.

The three of them relished on the sugar filled breakfast for a few silent minutes, before Jill started speaking again.

“So, is the subway still operational?” – she asked, Liam and Carlos side-eyed each other, then Liam looked down making a face, before Carlos started explaining.

“The subway left last night, shortly after you drove that freak away from us… Mikhail, Nicholai and the survivors should be safe by now.” –Jill whipped her hear at Liam.

“And you didn’t go with them? What were you thinking?!” – She said, Liam gave her a look before answering.

“You know damn well I wasn’t gonna leave the city without you, Bluebird” – Jill just scoff-laughed at the response. Then Carlos continued.

“Tyrell and I were tasked with rescuing a scientist from Umbrella’s Main Office Buildings, and Liam here” – he said, gesturing at the other man – “decided to tag along, in hopes of finding you along the way…” – he paused for a second – “We were caught up in the middle of a big swarm and… Well, Tyrell didn’t make it out.” – he said, looking down.

“We came across you, running away from that monster, almost immediately after” – Liam explained.

Jill put her hands behind her head and stretched for a minute, thinking, before slouching forward, letting out a sigh.

“Were you able to contact Mikhail since last night?” – she asked Carlos, his face gave away a sudden realization. He hadn’t even thought of trying to contact before they got to Dr. Flint.

“Let me check on them right now.” – he said, reaching to the radio attached to his left ear. – “Cap, it’s Carlos, do you copy?” – he waited for a few moments, static blaring in his ear as he made a face – “That’s strange… It’s not going though…” – he thought for a second, then tried again – “Nicholai, it’s Carlos? Do you copy?” – he repeated, more urgently this time. After waiting for a few more moments Carlos’ face lit up. – “Nicholai! Are the survivors safe and out of the city yet?” – he was shocked at the answer – “What? Derailed? How-?” – he seemed to be interrupted. Jill and Liam looked at each other for a second – “No, we haven’t been able to locate him yet…” – Carlos listened intently for a few more seconds – “Right, I’ll give you a call when we do.” – then the call ended. Carlos let his hand down in frustration, both Jill and Liam looking at him, waiting for an explanation.

“Carlos?... What’s going on?” – Liam pressed. Carlos rubbed the back of his neck and looked down, letting out a frustrated sigh.

“The sub crashed” – he said, Liam’s and Jill’s eyes widened – “Nicholai said something about debris blocking the rails… None of the survivors made it…”

“And Mikhail?” – Jill asked.

“He’s dead too.” – Carlos stated. Jill leaned back and looked to the side in exasperation, Liam covered his mouth and frowned at the implications of the situation.

‘I don’t trust it…’

“So, what now?” – Jill asked

“I still need to carry on with the mission” – Carlos stated – “Once we locate Dr. Flint, Nicholai will call for a rescue helicopter. That’s our ticket.” – Jill nodded.

“Alright…” – She started – “I never thought I’d save an Umbrella scientist of all people, but if that’s what gets us out of here…” – she looks at Liam, he gives her a nod – “We’ll do it.”

They prepped themselves for the job, Carlos geared back up, Liam practiced swinging his bat around, and Jill made sure to have her guns ready and loaded. She went to the bathroom for a minute, and Carlos peeped at Liam swinging his bat. He was so fast; the air made a whooshing sound with each swing. Liam realized Carlos was looking, and decided to put the bat down, approaching the other man.

“Hey, uh…” – he started – “Thank you… for listening. Last night, I mean.” – Carlos smiled in return, then Liam looked down for a second – “And also, I’m…” – It’s so hard to speak right now… - “I’m sorry for lashing out, on that first night.” – He looked up to see Carlos’ eyes – “You were just helping me and I said a bunch of shit… I didn’t even know if it was true-” – Carlos raised a hand in front of him, interrupting Liam.

“Don’t…” – he said softly – “Don’t apologize… I know it wasn’t that you had something against me…” – he inched closer to Liam, not knowing if it was okay for him to wrap his arms around him. Why is he doubting himself so much? – “I…” – he started, struggling to look at Liam in the eyes – “I meant what I said last night… Now, I know it’s a lot to ask… but please…” – he held the other man’s arms and squeezed them gently, and looked at him in the eyes – “Please, don’t die on me.” – there was a sense of urgency in his speech, Liam frowned at the floor, tears welling up in his eyes.

“I… I can’t…” – he couldn’t finish his sentence, and Carlos’ eyes went slightly wider at the realization that maybe Liam had no plans of getting out of Raccoon alive.

“Listen, you don’t have to do it for me… do it for Jill, okay?” – he squeezed the other man’s arms a little more – “Just…” – and he finally had the courage to hold him in a tight, longing embrace – “I have no idea what’s going on in that head of yours. I have no idea what you went through. I don’t know you…” – he pulled away from the hug, holding Liam by the shoulders – “But I want to know you. And as much as I appreciate what you did for me last night, and how you opened yourself to me. I would love to have a chance to see you well.”

Jill listened intently, hiding right on the bathroom doorway, she couldn’t help but smile softly at that last statement, she had her reservations about Carlos before, but maybe it was okay to trust him. With that thought, she decided to come out of her hiding spot, the two men quickly separating each other at her presence, which made her have to suppress a small chuckle.

“You guys ready to go get this guy?” – she asked, Carlos nodded.

“We’re all set, let’s go get Dr. Flint” – and Jill raised a brow, quickly whipping her head at Liam, who looked away from her just as fast. Carlos started heading outside to scout the immediate surroundings, and Liam tried to follow suit, but Jill grabbed his arm.

“Are we going to look for who I think we are?” – she said in a whisper, Liam tossed his head to a side and gave an exasperated sigh, and that was enough of an answer to confirm Jill’s suspicions, Liam shook off her arm and ran after Carlos before she could say anything else though.

‘This is bad…’

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Their quest for food on the previous night had led them away from the Umbrella Main Building, so they had to backtrack for a fair while., and since Fall was starting, the sun had started to set pretty early. Again, they all noticed the population of infected kept increasing, washing away hope of finding any other survivors.

They passed through the street where they had defeated the damn monster… except…

“Guys…?” – Liam started, worry painted on his tone. – “Where is… its body…?”

The three of them looked at each other, just how did that damn thing survive… AGAIN? There seemed to be a lack of undead around, too, had they migrated along with the creature?

“We’ll have to keep our eyes peeled” – Carlos said – “Hopefully we won’t run into it again…” – he wished out loud before continuing onwards. Their destination was close and Jill felt the anxiety building in her stomach at the prospect of finding Nathaniel, she couldn’t even begin to imagine how Liam could be feeling. He was dead quiet, and Jill had no idea what had happened exactly, but something in her gut told her it was going to get ugly.

“Guys, I’m going to check if I can find more water… I’ll be right back!” – she sprouted out that last part before jogging away at a convenience store’s general direction. Liam and Carlos looked at each other, a bit weirded out by the sudden gesture, but waited patiently for her to come back.

Once she was out of sight, she took out her radio.

Carlos heard the device on his ear receive the call.

“Carlos? It’s me, pretend like you are talking to Nicholai, or something.” – Jill said to him. Carlos did his best to hide the face he made, turning his back on Liam before pressing the button on the device in order to answer.

“Alright… What’s up?” – he asked.

“I need to know something. Listen carefully, this is important…” – she started, Carlos just kept quiet and waited for her to continue – “Is this Dr. Flint called Nathaniel?” – Carlos’ face contorted into shock despite his best attempts to hide it, thank fucking god he had his back on Liam still.

“How do you know this?” - He asked, as calm as he could, on the other end of the line, Jill gave a stressed sigh in response.

“Fuck… fuck! This isn’t good… Listen, Nate and Liam used to know each other… before he was… gone.” – Carlos raised an eyebrow.

“O-kay…?” – what did she mean by “gone” …?

“I know it’s unavoidable for them to see each other at this point, but I need your help to keep an eye on Liam, I still have no idea what happened 4 years ago but something tells me it wasn’t good… and I don’t want Liam to get hurt…” – the concern in her voice was so genuine, Carlos sucked in a deep breath before answering.

“You got it, man. I’ll get to it, the sooner we get out of here, the better.” – he said, then ended the call. He turned and saw that Liam had been looking at him the entire time, anxiety rose in him for a few moments, but he rationalized it was impossible for Liam to be able to hear Jill from his earbud… right?

“Liam, could you call Jill? Nicholai is pressing me to find Dr. Flint asap.” – he asked the other man, just to make sure he didn’t suspect anything.

Liam did just that, and as soon as Jill was back with them, they continued onwards towards the building, just a couple blocks away. The air was thick with tension as they got closer and closer.

“Alright…” – Carlos started – “The building should be around this corner…” – then shared a look with Jill. The sounds of the undead filled their ears the closer they got to said corner. Carlos raised his index finger to his lips, then gestured Jill and Liam to stay low as he walked slowly, back against the wall, to the edge of it.

He peeked his head around and sure enough, there was a big horde of the fuckers waddling around in front of the building, a lot of them looked like they were in uniform, several security staff, white collars and lab coats dressing the walking corpses. He retracted back and approached the pair waiting for him, crouched down.

“There’s a lot of them…” – he whispered to them – “We will need to look at each other’s backs if we want to get through.” – Jill nodded at him, then looked at Liam, he seemed out of it, looking out into nothingness as sweat built on his brow.

“You okay?” – Carlos’ voice broke him out of his state, Liam just kept quiet and nodded – “Alright… let’s do this.”

The three of them turned the corner and were greeted by a crowd of zombies. They all got ready and charged forward, each wielding their own weapon, ready to tear through the crowd and bring it down before they entered the building.

Thankfully, Jill’s trip on the early morning had them prepared for this, so the first few minutes went with no issue… That is, until Liam saw a familiar face from behind the broken glass doors of the building. A half-rotted, all too familiar face.

Liam froze, his eyes fixated on the one standing corpse as his breath started to get labored, unadulterated anger rushing through his body and filling his mind in an instant. The bat he had slipped off his hands, calling to Carlos’ attention as it hit the floor. He approached Liam as he saw the man about to mindlessly walk right into the horde, barely able to grab him by the arm.

Nothing could have ever prepared him for what he saw next.

His blood ran cold in fear as he saw Liam slowly turn his head to him, his eyes bright red, as if all the blood in his body had gone into his eyes and to his sclera, his face was twisted in animalistic rage, pale and riddled with bulging blue and yellowish veins. Liam opened his mouth, and a deep guttural voice sounded out.

“L̴̖̜̩̼̘̯̯͋Ẹ̵̹̯̻̞̻͆T̶͓̐̽̐̃͛͗͠ͅ ̵̱̜͚͓͂̐̀̉͂̕M̴̡̜̜͑̒̑̄̉̕͜E̴̯̠͚̹̺̲̩̍ ̶̩̻͇̞̜̲̈͑͌G̶̯̘̟̒̊̈́O̷̱̍̄͒̋.̶̦̟͙̻̲̒͂̈́̈͘͜”

Carlos’ hand went limp for a split second, allowing Liam to charge into the horde, grabbing his hunting knife, letting out a battle cry as he made a bee-line for that one corpse, that goddamn fucking corpse, right at the entrance of the building.

Jill heard Liam’s voice and turned to see him in the middle of the horde, fast approaching the door, and Carlos, frozen in place. She ran up to the man and snapped him out of it.

“What the fuck? I asked you to keep an eye on-” – she started to scold him, until he saw Carlos’ face white as a sheet, looking at her with wide beaded eyes.

The zombies clung onto Liam as he made his way through, his arms and torso scratched and bitten, but he just kept moving forwards as if there was nothing other than him and his target.

He gave a second scream as he launched himself to the corpse he had spotted, making it fall on the ground.

Jill and Carlos started to desperately clear out the horde, gunning the zombies down as fast as they could, they couldn’t see Liam anymore, but could still hear him, loud and clear.

Liam pinned the living corpse’s arms under his knees and stared at it for a second, rage building up in his blood. That face, that fucking face. He gritted his teeth and rose his knife, wielding it with both of his hands, and stabbed his target in the chest, over, and over, and over again.

“You piece of shit!” – and another stab – “After everything you’ve done to me!” – another stab – “You think you can just get out of it the easy way?” – another stab, the corpse’s chest started to lose shape, becoming a mess of mushy flesh and blood.

“Fuck you!” – a stab – “Fuck you, fuck you, FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU!” – he screamed repeatedly as he continued stabbing the chest of the creature that just barely moved underneath him at this point.

Jill and Carlos had finished cleaning out the rest of the zombies, and Liam could hear them fast approaching.

He sat up, his hands bathed in red up past the wrist, and looked down one more time, then let out a pained cry as he delivered a final blow into the undead’s head, killing it for good. Then he sat there, still holding his knife, his face buried in his hands as the other two finally caught up to him.

They looked in horror as they saw Liam heaving out breaths, still on top of the half-rotted, and now horribly mutilated, corpse.

Jill took a closer look and her breath got caught in her throat for a second – “Is that…?” – This is a far cry from what she expected, never in her wildest dreams could she imagine Liam reacting like this.

Liam just grabbed the ID card still attached to the corpse, and handed it to Carlos, never looking up as he wiped his hands on his shirt.

Carlos wiped the blood off the card to be able to read, then gave a defeated sigh – “Nathaniel Flint…” – he said quietly.

Liam’s sudden, pained and loud gasp for air broke the pair out of their shock, now noticing the state of Liam’s arms. Jill fell on her knees, defeated, there were so many bites on him, it was impossible for them to find the vaccine before it was too late, she thought. She buried her face in her hands, concealing the stream of tears that started to run down. Carlos rushed to Liam’s side, panic welding in his stomach, and a heavy knot growing in his throat at the prospect of being forced to see him turn.

He shook all of that off, and fumbled around his pockets to get gauze, his hands shaking.

“Let me… I’m gonna patch you up, and we’re looking for that vaccine, okay?” – he said, in complete denial, his eyes burned from the hot tears welding up in them – “Here, just-” – he reached to grab Liam’s arm and start bandaging it, only for Liam to pull away.

“It’s fine…” – he said quietly. Carlos reached for him again, not listening, which made Liam stand and step away from him – “I’m telling you, it’s fine!” – he yelled, Carlos stood and went for him instantly.

“Liam, please. We still got time!” – he said, holding the other man’s shoulders – “There’s still time, we can-” – but he was interrupted by a low, cynical laugh escaping Liam’s lips.

Jill looked up at them, and noticed Liam’s grip on his knife get stronger, his knuckles going white with pressure.

“How about I just show you?” – Liam said as he took a single step back from Carlos. Jill felt a deep primal fear at those words, and nothing, absolutely nothing could have prepared her, nor Carlos, to what they were about to witness.

Liam lifted his shirt, exposing his stomach, a long old scar dividing it in half, longwise. He proceeded to bite on the lower hem of his shirt, keeping his torso exposed, as he raised his knife in the air.

Then he swung it down into his own stomach.

Their eyes widened and their jaws dropped, their faces twisted in shock and hurt, unable to accept what was happening in front of them, as well as to move a single muscle as Liam rose his knife back up, and stabbed himself yet again, letting out a pained grunt.

Carlos snapped out of it and went closer to Liam, as he delivered a third stab into his gut.

“Stop! Liam-” – he screamed, tears streaming down his face as he grabbed Liam’s wrist before he could stab himself again. Liam struggled to free his wrist for a second, before Carlos wrapped his other arm around him in a tight hug. Grief washed over Liam, and he let the knife slip from his hand as the both of them fell on their knees.

“Why did you do this?” – Carlos sobbed quietly into Liam’s ear; the other man had his arms down on his sides.

“It’s fine…” – he said again.

“ITS NOT FINE!” – Carlos cried out loud, but Liam just calmly put one of his hands on Carlos’ nape, guiding him to look down.

“I’m telling you… it’s fine. Look…” – he said, quietly as he lifted his shirt again, and guided the other man’s hand to touch him. Carlos couldn’t believe his eyes as he wiped away the blood.

There were no wounds, just the scar he had seen a few moments ago, he decided to do the same on Liam’s arms, as he wiped away the blood, he saw none of the bites remained.

Liam finally unbandaged his hands, showing his palms, pristine and unwounded, as if nothing had ever happened to them. Jill crawled closer to them to see; words caught up in her throat as she grabbed one of Liam’s hands.

“What…? How...?” – Carlos breathed out, and Liam broke down.

“I can’t… I can’t die.” – he said as he started sobbing uncontrollably – “I can’t die, Carlos. I can’t die!” – he said as he hunched down, clinging onto Carlos’ shirt for dear life as he cried – “They… He did this to me…” – Carlos could only hold him close, looking into Jill’s eyes, their gazes mirroring their emotions. Liam wailed so loud, as if he was being tortured – “I’m so tired. I can’t take it anymore, I’m so tired… I just want to go…” – he confessed as he cried.

Guilt hung over Carlos as he remembered Liam’s reaction at the realization that he worked for Umbrella. A certain question echoing in the back of his mind over and over.

‘Do you have any idea of how many lives have been destroyed or ruined in the name of your company?’

‘I don’t… And I’m sorry…’

He held Liam closer as he cried with him.

‘I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…’

#im not sorry #lmao #RE #resident evil #resident evil 3 #resident evil x reader #carlos oliveira #carlos oliveira x transmasc oc #jill valentine #nicholai ginovaef #angst #tw self harm #this isnt even my final form #we still have a long way to go folks #strap in #cause this is just the tip of the iceberg

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asphyxiatedredherring · 6 months

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Wiki how to deal with the girl the government peer pressured your parents into adopting who is a manipulative bitch and genuinely just a horrible person but you're legally stuck with now

#im home for the holidays and it kinda sucks because she kills the mood and is really bad for everyone especially my moms mental health #for backstory feb of 2020 the gov reached out to my parents who werent even registered foster parents and asked them to be an emergency #placement for her then covid and a whole shit show later my parents legally adopted her and are now stuck with this middle schooler who is #psychologically fucked up but has been able to manipulate every professional shes ever seen into seeing her as the victim #she plays up the foster care thing but her favorite thing to get attention and pity is that shes in a wheelchair which already doesnt work #on my family because we are all disabled but she uses it to manipulate able bodied people into feeling bad for her #god i sound like such bad person for complaining about her but this isnt even the tip of the iceberg and im tired of seeing my mom cry

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tropicalscream · 8 months

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blah blah Bethesda bad anyway

my favorite thing about Elder Scrolls is how goddamn fuckin weird it is

like on surface it's just some dnd game but like even a cursory glance shows tis fucking insane like:

The moons is the corpse of a god

the stars are actually holes in reality when alot of primordial spirits hated that mortals were becoming a thing and fucked off

The demon lord of forbidden knowledge/resident Cthulhu stand-in might also be the beta version of the entire fucking universe made sentient when it wasn't chosen to be the used reality

there are cat ppl that take the form of furrys, lions, or regular cats, so you can have a cursing Pirate legend whose an alcoholic & wanted in 5 countries but is also a like basic tabby cat

the wood elves are so pro-nature they're cannibals and also they murder vegetarians

Vampires came from the Lord of Rape doing well ya know

Werewolves came to exist bc the lord of hunt got bored and is a furry

sex is treated like a fucking ip copyright contract on what aspect of sex is happening and what god it's under. There's been many religious wars about this

The lizard ppl are part tree

the Dwarves all fucked off somewhere and disappeared bc they were so atheist they did math to break relativity and literally no one has any idea where they went God or mortal (except maybe Cthulhu and hes not telling)

Said Cthulhu stand-in treats hiding your grandma's secret cookie recipe & hiding a spell that would end the universe and slay a god the exact same and he will murder you for either

Everyone wants to fuck the Orcs but will never admit it and they got so bent out of shape that a demon god killed the og orc god, ate him, and shat him out bc she couldn't deal with everyone complimenting them all the time so now all Orcs are cursed to be hated but they're all still sexy & so is their god

And all this isnt even the tip of the iceberg

#tes #the elder scrolls #tesblr #daedric prince #elder scrolls online #eso #skyrim

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timeisacephalopod · 1 year

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You gotta love how much of American politics is calling other countries shit holes but god forBID anyone criticize their gun hugging to the point of children being mowed down like a fuckin lawn all the time and then all of the sudden you can't criticize countries you aren't from, if you're not American your opinion is worth zero!Then shut up about the whole Middle East, China, Russia, and whoever else you hate this week if not being from a country means you can't say shit about it. At least be consistent in what you believe, and barring that at least be up front that you think you need Special Boi Rules just for America.

Obviously a lot of Americans don't act like this, but the ones that do should just be up front about their double standards so we can dismiss their opinions for any conversation about international politics and geopolitical issues because they're obviously incapable of participating.

#winters ramblings #america drives me NUTS. you can shit all over EVERYONE but no one can say shit about you??#why do you think you should be able to dish it to the point of iran contra and all that nonsense via regan #but no one can tell you gun laws are common fucking sense even if you DO support the right to own a gun #OBVIOUSLY not everyone should have a gun. O B V I O U S L Y. and thats like the TIP of the iceberg on idiot American politics #the two party system and the electoral college PLUS unimpeachable court pisitions are next and no canada isnt getting off scott free here #because we ALSO have the unimpeachable court officials issue 🙄🙄🙄#still talk THAT much shit about china then shut ur ass when people insult stupid laws you have

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catgirlriya · 1 year

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im going to start clawing at the walls and pacing around my enclosure WHAT is wrong with my professor. im in 4 classes taught by this dude and he puts in literally no fucking effort his teaching is AWFUL and he literally is the most impossible person I've ever had to work with. ive been super fucking busy this week on top of being generally unwell at the start of this week (i had a medical emergency last Saturday that drained a lot of my energy) not to mention im off my meds because of my drs office being incompetent and so i haven't even been able to make my schedule for this week. tell me why i look at my classes today for the first time this week and we had a fucking group project this week that our professor never mentioned last week. this is my last straw im so serious i cannot work with this man he's fucking impossible

#ri speaks #im going to lose my mind im so serious #this isnt even the tip of the iceberg with him either #hes fucking awful #this is the type of person that makes people who would thrive in the mh field quit and people who will make the field worse continue anyway #this is the type of person who will argue with you that social work is a 'objectively better' degree even though its clearly subjective #i hate this man so fucking much #every week i consider quitting this field because this dude is literally making my life miserable #do you know how fucking bad that is #MY SPECIAL INTEREST IS PSYCHOLOGY.#AND THIS MAN IS MAKING MY CONSIDER GIVING THAT UP.

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alanisinstone · 1 year

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so i've had a channing tatum obsession since step up and a magic mike one since the first and i just thought this little shit up so. uh yeah. read at ur own risk mfers

18+ content

so male stripper bakugou who works at the best club there is in Tokyo really, has the hottest guys, the skimpiest outfits, the best liquor, its clean and sexy in there, and the music isnt corny (think the weekend and shit😛). so you come in there because ur girl wanted to do a girls night (she’s crazy) and you didnt really want to go but your therapist has been telling you that you should get out more.

so you go and you feel kinda out place and uncomfy a little because (for the sake of my fantasy) you’re not rlly the party type. ur not like bible thumper but ur just reserved. in general you like reading and picnics and flower arrangements and sunsets. so this isn’t rlly ur scene yk. but the tip of the iceberg of things that people would never suspect about you, is that you are desperately shoving your cute little fingers in your cunt every night searching for release. and you literally want it so bad but your own fingers just never seem to be enough for you. you just wanna get railed like a cheap whore and then loved like a queen.

and there’s like, little nuances to ur personality for example you’re a little bookworm, but like 75% of the books you’re reading are very explicit eroticas. and you like going to the beach at sunset but only because that’s when you can somewhat discreetly strip bare and finger yourself to some good graphic smut or skinny dip (you’re dying to go to a nude beach). and you’re always going to little quirky thrifty markets but partly so you can brush your cute, tight little booty up against the men (married or not... its for scientific purposes) staring at your tits from across the way, innocently urging them to get a peak of your lingerie down the front of your shirt or under your SHORT SHORT skirt (you only dress like that when you’re extra desperate tho, you dress pretty normal on the reg. it’s part of ur unsuspecting hottie thing).

so inside you’re like a little sex kitten, but outside you’re too shyyyy 🥺 to make any moves. then out walks katsuki. you’re sitting pretty on the black velvety half circle couch with ur girls, smack in the middle of it. you have on like a tennis skirt and a no sleeve, collared polo. you’re over there giving country-club-virgin-daughter-of-the-mayor and all ur friends are giving saturday-night-slut. anyways.

kats comes out giving TYLER GAGE but you can see he has like a thong on under his cargo pants. and it’s the first act you guys have really seen since u sat down and settled, all ur friends are hollering like banshees, and ur tryyingg to keep up your “oh my, this is so unsavory, how raunchy!” thing but the way hes LOCKING eyes with you and humping the stage is making you start to loose your composure.

so he’s doing his little moves or whatevah, lookin fine as hell. the crowd is already going crazy and he’s not even been out there for two minutes, so he decides to like spice it up a little. he sees you trying to act all nonchalant and it makes you stand out amongst your friends so he jumps of the stage and gets on top of you grinding and shit and he’s leaning all over you like "hey mama you havin fun" all up in ur ear, and you're like "umm, i mean, this isn't really my scene you know..." bashfully looking away. And you can feel him literally staring into your soul like he is STARING YOU DOWN, and its making you so shy and wet as fuck at the same time.

so the snap-back comes off and all the sudden its on your head and the shirt is coming off (hes still grinding on you and doing his little choreo) and he places your hands on his washboard abs and you are fully like "oh shit. this couch def has a wet spot on it" and hes whispering all low in your ear like "you like that shawty" and you're speachless. so he gets up and does the pants-rip-off thing and he has a literal thong on that is not containing anything. and he jumps up on the couch and grabs your head and pushes it against the back of it and is fully humping your face.

at this point i would have fully been grabbing HANDFULS of his ass and licking his shit fr and i like to think you would be too.

now hes straddling your face and his hand is all up in your hair, looking down at you like the sexy motherfucker he is and hes like "well I think a little fun would do you good, you look like you need to loosen up babe." and his dick is like right in your face, his thighs, his v-line, happy trail, you can literally see his balls, and you're drenched and flushed at this point and he can practically smell you.

so he does a flip off the back of the couch or whatevah.. comes around, grabs your cute hand thats been in your lap since the beginning, tugs you up off the couch and picks you up, legs around him. everyone is cheering and your still wearing his hat as hes walking you to the private room....

AAAAAHHHHHGJVGGHH BARK

likes and reblogs appreciated!

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sexymanbattleroyale · 1 year

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description for these guys under the cut, in case you dont know who they are

Gabriel: There is so much to unpack about this guy holy fuck. So he's an angel, or well, he used to be an angel, now he's a fallen angel. and in terms of the lore we know about him we know that he's very well loved among the other angels and also he has A REALLY FUCKING HIGH BODYCOUNT (he doesnt remember how high it is but he has killed and will kill again), and basically he was like "i love serving the council" (god is dead in ultrakill btw. council took its place), then he fights your player character (named V1), then he loses and the council is like "you have 24 hours to live". then he fights V1 again and he gets owned so hard that he realizes that the council fucking sucks so he kills all of them. That isnt even the tip of the iceberg you can find out the rest by yourselves if you wanna. and he has MULTIPLE banger ass boss themes Christopher: hes in a vocaloid song by ghost. he does gaslighting and he smashes the mirrors that show him his true form and then claims that it was the mirrors fault. yeah hes an asshole. also he can do really freakish things with his spine. like he can twist himself around like total 360 and all. at the end of his song the mirrors that he's been smashing burn him and then according to one of the tags he ends up in some kind of alternate dimension i think. and then another tag told me thats not confirmed so we dont know what really happened to him. AND he has a banger ass theme song.

#christopher pierre #the distortionist #ghost and pals #ultrakill gabriel #ultrakill #gabriel #round three #stupid sexyman competition

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irldiancie · 2 months

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All Kagehina “proof” I know of

Ok i wasnt gonna post this but ive been told by a friend to explain why some might ship Kagehina so... try me. i dont exactly ship this myself but lets just say im a pro when it comes to this topic also it's not as bad as i thought it was there are worse ships idk why i was a hater also i lowkey got some of this from shipping wiki but most of it i knew already, plus NOT ALL OF THIS IS NECESSARILY REFERENCES TO THE SHIP it kinda just adds on to it anyways lets just get into it

ok so starting with common knowledge i think everyone knows that Hinata is the protagonist followed with Kageyama being the deuteragonist, they get the most screen time together and are pretty much paired MOST of the series, we get a lot of content with them together while also getting content of them on their own, they're known as the "freak duo," the "greatest teammates" and like 100 other names they've been called I've seen a lot of people intemperate their relationship wrong, I've seen a few say Kageyama was downright "abusive" to Hinata which I think is a little farfetched, but to each their own! They genuinely do care for each other and it shows, even at the end of the manga you can tell how far their relationship has come, even if they consider themselves rivals, they are without a doubt still friends Now a lot of people have said "well they're not gay they're just friends", while this is true, it has been referenced/implied officially in many places, including manga panels and english dubs, so while it isn't canon there is a few cute things about it which we know are official which is why I'm sharing this, I myself know it isn't canon, plus I didn't really make this to prove anything it was kinda for fun sorry if that made little to no sense but I'll start getting into more interesting stuff 1. at the tip of the iceberg we have the fact they're in so much official art together

theres like a 1000 more of these btw theyre often put near eachother even in official arts not based off them

I have like 1k more of these but i have more proof than this but i think you get my point some of this is probably promo art but that's also considered official art so 2. moving on i think another known one is that Ukai calls them lovebirds ONE TIME in English dub and I have no idea who approved that but I think it's funny and obviously this probably meant nothing but take it as you want video of it here 3. this is kinda randomly thrown in but the fact that they also trust eachother, they've mentioned it a couple times but I think it's nice to know 4. i dont remember when this was or what chapter or something but kageyamas grandfather said "somebody even better will come for you", which just happened to be Hinata of course 5. ALSO after that whole fight scene back in season two, Hinata says this

he didnt really consider kageyama as a friend, but he considered him a partner which i believe is more important to hinata. teammates/partners were always something Hinata wanted, as before he went to Karasuno, he didn't feel like his friends in Junior high were necessarily teammates. Meaning he valued Kageyama more because he was his partner.

(credits to triananero for these images) and when him and Kageyama started working together, they most definitely were perfect together, as they balanced each-other out, which made them become an unstoppable duo or whatever they called them 6. the fact that they have matching jersey numbers 9 and 10 moving on to less canon stuff, there is a light novel of Haikyuu called Haikyū!! Shōsetsuban!! which probably isnt close to canon but Furudate was a part of it even though it wasn't written by him, so it's at least somewhat official 7. anyway according to shipping wiki there is a chapter where Kageyama feels "fluttery feelings at the bottom of his stomach" when Hinata texts him, it's on volume 8 chapter 1, I REALLY WANTED TO SHOW YOU GUYS BUT I COULDNT FIND IT ANYWHERE ONLINE. i searched countless tumblr posts and websites but i could only find chapter five and chapter three so im fully convinced this is lost media LMAOOOO 8. also in Haikyū!! Shōsetsuban!! apparently there's a part where Hinata daydreams about him and Kageyama eating under cherry blossom trees i just found that cute AS MUCH AS I WANNA SHOW YOU GUYS I LITERALLY CANNOT FIND ANYTHING OF THIS LIGHT NOVEL ANYWHERE i just know it's real, if I ever get my hands on it which I doubt, I'll share proof it exists btw AND THIS IS REALLY RANDOM AND SOMEONE WANTED ME TO INCLUDE THIS BUT 9. Basically there was a ad for deodorant a couple years back, collabing with Haikyuu, where you could buy deodorants to “smell like them” or whatever, some shippers believe it’s a Kagehina reference as they also advertised Kageyama and Hinatas scents together as some like matching couple thing

and then there's this

And I think I've said enough, there's way more you can find out about this ship, but I hope with this post you've learned something new or whatever... I MIGHT MAKE THIS A SERIES should i do kenhina next or kuroken ANYWAYS DISCLAIMER I didnt look too much into most of these things but I can gaurentee this stuff is true also this was just for fun and not serious but i hope you liked my little post!

#haikyuu #kagehina #im just rambling #kageyama #tobio kageyama #haikyuu!!#ship #um #PLS ignore all the grammar mistakes i made this wasnt supposed to be serious #i love hinata shouyou #hinata shouyou #shippingpost #haikyu #hi #wht ship should i do next

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