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scrufflesksunnide · 5 months

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Something I've been working on for awhile and finally I can tell you what this au is ABOUT.

Welcome to...

SURVIVOR AND MONK: ECHOS OF TIME!

an AU that tries to follow the canon of rain world in it's own unique way, creating new landscapes, added backgrounds that weren't there in rain world, new characters, and overall headcanons galore!

The AU is heavily inspired by things like Mario and Luigi: Partners in Time and Omori! Character refs and information below!

The premise of the au is about Survivor and Monk being contacted by a familiar white iterator from the void, who sends them on a mission to fix this world before things get messy with the landscapes they stand on shifting from times ahead and before, the memories they gained being wiped from them completely, and everything being set back to the very beginning. Their goal is to close time rifts causing this calamity, with the help of the Echos trapped inside these rifts, not only will they gain power to help the world but also gain memory the player never got to see... Will they be doomed to repeat this loop again due to their own problems? Or will they stop it all in time, before they have to repeat it all over again? They are all stuck here for their flaws, much like the echoes before them... maybe it is possible to break the cycle for once...? Meet the Main Cast!:

"Seth" aka The Survivor

Age: 20 Likes: Collecting pearls, Manny, Happy thoughts, Nature, History Dislikes: Having to give up pearls, Lizards, Bad thoughts, Thunder Storms (how ironic), and forgetting about the good times...

"Trying to find peace and happiness in a world that hurt them, their curiosity leads them into a new adventure. However, they aren't alone this time. With their sibling by their side, nothing will take this duo down!"

"Still full of curiosity, they are a sucker for nature much like their sibling. They are deeply curious about nature and wants to explore the world for what it has to offer. Their thoughts cannot be trusted however, despite it being full of curiosity, it is also full of doubt and bad faith after bring them down and keeping them rather depressed. They are numbed by the cruelty of this world, often not showing their emotions due to feeling static. It makes it hard to understand what's going on with them when they don't show a lot that's going on inside. However, they try their best to see a brighter future. They are quiet for the most part, but isn't scared to take action when necessary." Relationship Chart:

"Manny" aka The Monk

Age: 18 Likes: Gardening, Seth, Lizards, Batflies, Donating! Dislikes: Fire, Violence, Blood, seeing Seth sad, being alone. "Full of sunshine and and optimism. No matter of their naive nature, they set out to save this world with their kindness and their sibling by their side. Flourishing their way through this world with kindness has it's ups and downs however, we'll just have to see how they take it." "Peppy and happy, they try their best to make others joyful as well... to the best of their abilities anyway. They can be naive and foolish, they aren't super smart but they try their hardest... though sometimes they push themselves a little too hard. Due to the incident with Seth, they HATE being separated from him and suffers from separation anxiety. Their separation anxiety makes it hard for the duo to split up when it is needed, creating a struggle for the poor fella." Relationship Chart:

"Harvey"/"Harv" aka The Hunter

Age: 19 Likes: Doing risky shit, Red Lizard meat (sorry Manny), combat, their friends... helping out others in need... oh and uh, jokes Dislikes: staying in one place, being fluffy in the morning (yes they do fluff up fun fact!), being on a time limit, scav tolls, failing the mission. "After living through the scary odds, much to the world's pity, they live weaker than what they once were... but luckily they gained a strange but much needed friend." "Energetic and risk-taking, they make great effort to be danger to the enemies who dare try and disturb the peace. They led their ego and pride get the best of them at times and get carried away with playing the role of "hero" as that's the only thing they feel they have left to their name... "hero". They will willingly take a spear if it meant people made it out alive, they will rush head first into danger to shield those they care for... but in turn get extremely hurt in the progress. They can be impatient and does not want to be stuck in one place for more than 10 minutes, they have a soul that NEEDS heroic action and NOW!" Relationship Chart:

enot (dats me!!) the inventor (hehe see what we did there?) here's my [icture!

im 20 even though some people don't believe that fo[r sum reason (also I am very tired so my typig mayyyyyy be a bit wacky but ill fix it latr... probs) anyway uhhh I liek making cool gadgets, being the prettiest thing you'll ever see, my friendsss, eg, and kissing my babe (sethy!!) (and they is MINE, I will KILL YOU IF YOU DARE TOUCH THEM... just kidding!! there's enough of them (and me!) to go around!) and I like long walks on the shore! what I DONT like. I HAAAAAATE when people do not cooparate with each other and don't stick to the plan! like I swear everytime I'm playing skywars I get so pissed because I get teamed up with kids who dont even know how the game works OR they are SO egostical that they try doing stupid stuff and dont LISTEN to the guy who has actually PLAYED the game and KNOWS what their DOING!!! only reason why I lose so damn much is because of these bad teams holding me back, thats why I do solos most of the time and I do SO GREAT with those and- whats that? OH CRAP SORRY UH UH, I also don't like spiders and dark places, I've had a big fear of it back then and I've gotten over it... I think. anyway! im just gonna copy and paste this and be on my way, see ya later! "I'm stubborn sure but I have a great plan!... at least plans that are silly to others but DO work. I guess my biggest downside is I take too much pride in myself and i'm a bit too loud haha but im working on it!! Im very caring and loving and im cringe but im free!! I maybe a bit unstable... physically I mean PHYSICALLY IM FINE MENTELLY... I think. I do have a feeeeew memory issues (but im pretty sure everyone else does since, yknow, the current situation, hopefully I gain my memories back soon with those echoes!) anyyyway, hope you have fun reading everyone else's bios, see ya soon readers!! -love enot" Relationship Chart:

"Grant" aka The Gourmand

Age: 25 Likes: Mold Slime (Loves it so much that 80% of their body is made OF it!... wait that's probably really unhealthy- uhhh-), taking care of slugpups, crafting handy tools, hugging, and art Dislikes: People hurting their tribe, not eating for a period of time, seeing others sad, letting their craving/urges win. "One of the slugcat tribe's greatest warriors and excellent crafter, only thing holding them back from their truest peak is their huge appetite." "Carefree and always willing to protect those they love most. They be a bit slow but they are a lovable guy all around! They often get hungry due to them consuming a lot of mold slime, needing more food to feed their belly and having a shift in mind if they don't get food right away, they often eat other people's food without realizing it. This becomes a problem when people need to save food, it's a huge struggle for them to control these new found urges and often gets disappointed in themselves for letting those urges win. Despite this, they make up for it by trying to be a good role model and inspiration for people. They aren't the actual leader of the slugcats, however, they do take role as leader when the current leader is dead (unlikely but can happen) or they need to split up for expeditions. Relationship Chart:

"Asher"/"Ashley" The Artificer

Age: 20 Likes: Taking care of slugpups and baby scavs, when people do their job, quiet, listening to music, combat, scav boxing matches that take place every Wednesday night (they like watching them instead of being in them cuz they don't trust themselves with fighting people as they get, rough, really rough.) Dislikes: Loud noises, Seeing slugpups get hurt, leeches, water fuck water FUCK WATER FUCK WATER-, having breathing problems, smoke, being reminded of their mistakes, having to get violent. "A strict but fair ruler to the scavengers, swore to make sure scavs don't dare try and step out of line with slugcats ever again. Despite their rage and violent past, they have calmed down and learned that taking on this role (the role the old ruler barely did right) would be a good change in the slugcat race." "Ash often gets a bit annoyed when people step out of line, but luckily they don't expect people to be perfect, they will NOT give slack to people that step out of line on purpose. They are more mature and parent like when it comes to ruling over the scavs, at first they saw them as freaks, but they grew on them after awhile and treated every single scav as if they were their own, even if they don't show it, they appreciate their hard work. They can be demanding but they would never ask anyone to do something dangerous unless they knew they could handle it. They can be pessimistic, most of the time feeling down due to thoughts, that doesn't make them less of a fighter however. They are a combat warrior when it comes to fighting, just because they got rid of their violent ways to the scavs... doesn't mean they got rid of it for the other creatures like vultures, lizards, and centipedes. Relationship Chart:

"Ruffles"/"WD (Water Dancer)" aka The Rivulet

Age: 18 Likes: Collecting pearls with Seth, Swimming, relaxing and chilling with LTTM, other fishes, pretty lights. Dislikes: Huge waves, being Pressured, being on a deadline, being made fun of, getting startled by people, rain, and the rot. "Being on the run for awhile, they were sent out by chasing wind to deliver a data pearl to any surviving iterators out there. Their anxiety is the key to their speed as they rush towards their destination out of fear alone." "Ruffles gets startled pretty easily, though their reaction is oddly... delayed. They often have trouble controlling their vocal volume when they are not relaxed, often getting shaky and anxious when put on the spot or is the center of attention... but when they are relaxed and calm, they really open up to be a fun loving slugcat! They feel they need to get things done quickly due to the events that happened with trying to GET to shoreline, that and they think people might get disappointed in them if they don't do it quick enough. This results in them getting more anxious and things could easily fall apart if people don't catch up. They can be clumsy but makes up for it by having fast reflexes, they almost drop your birthday cake? Fear not as they will do their DAMNEST to have that birthday cake be perfectly fine! They see LTTM as their best friend, often feeling relaxed and comfortable around her, LTTM is the only time where Ruffles feels safe... other than their friends of course." Relationship Chart:

"Sii07" aka The Spearmaster

Age: 19 Likes: Challenging themselves, having a goal and completing it, drawing/painting, SRS... and warm places. Dislikes: Failing a goal, not having a purpose, being bored, people getting in their way, and vultures. "A message slug created by Seven Red Suns that fulfilled their purpose... but found themselves in an unsatisfying life after their loss. They find new albeit, risky and hurtful adventures to challenge themselves so they can feel they have purpose... or at least try to think they do."

"Sii has a knack for putting themselves in dangerous expeditions, resulting in them getting hurt often... but they feel completely numb to it all. They set too ambitious goals with only satisfaction as their reward. It takes a lot to get them to stop trying to do dangerous expeditions but when they do stop even if for a bit, they can be a chill and almost inspiring! They are a pretty good critic too when it comes to art and combat, even though they can be harsh whenever it's negative, they want people to improve upon their skills... It seems pointless to them to try and teach people things... for now at least. They are highly determined, always preserving no matter what, this can be a good... and bad thing. They can get bored pretty easily so they like to doodle or draw full on pieces of art for however long they feel like it, it's much rarer nowadays... but when you get to see it, it's beautiful." Relationship Chart:

"Sage" aka The Saint

Age: 21 Likes: Uhh... Guiding people to the right path...? They didn't really... fill this out. Dislikes: They don't like meat... that's pretty much all I could gather. "Created by-" what?... would you rather that be private? You sure there are people already kno- Okay, okay. We can skip that part. "They set up to help people in need, and be of a sort of guide for Seth and Manny on their quest to fix this big problem... again." "A pacifistic being whom aims to help others in need of guidance. Although their perfectionist nature holds them back from being happy with their results often times. They do their best to support Seth and Manny in their adventure, testing their new found powers and helping them be better people. They have a tendency to not let people in their personal life... but sometimes, just sometimes, people can gain their trust. They are highly mysterious and it's hard to tell if they mean well or not... but they haven't hurt anyone so far and they seem to want to help people with their calm and on form approach." Relationship Chart:

More info coming soon!! This post will be updated now and then so do check back here every now and then! Comics will be in the making soon as well so keep look out for that!

#rain world #rain world downpour #echos of time au #rain world fanart #rw survivor #rw enot #rw monk #rw gourmand #rw saint #rw spearmaster #rw rivulet #rw artificer #rw hunter #rw au #MORE TO COME SOON!!

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haizediz · 7 months

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Fire on Ice.

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Hailee Steinfeld x female Reader

Summary: Depression is cold but not the love you both hold.

Warnings: depression; panic attack; fluff explotion; Hailee being the cutest person on earth; soft and comforting Hailee (we love her sfm)

a/n: Y/n (Reader) is an image of me and i don't have anyone like Hailee and how i described her in this fic, so i decided to write this. [i'm so freaking proud of my title and summary for this fic lol]

[Also one of the paragraphs is inspired by euphoria.]

P.s. Thank you for all the support! Notes and Reblogs are highly appreciated, love you <3

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"Life is hard" That's what everybody says. As a kid you don't really understand why everybody says that. But at some point the vision gets more and more visible..., or invisible. It's always different for every kind of person.

You don't know why, but your Life is not just hard. Sometimes it's beautiful and you enjoy it and at other times you feel like you can't breathe. Like you're stuck in a hole and you can't get out. Like you're depressed.

The other thing about depression is it kinda collapses time. Suddenly you find your whole days blending together to create one endless and suffocating loop. So you find yourself trying to remember the things that made you happy. But slowly, your brain begins to erase every memory that ever brought you joy. And eventually, all you can think about is how life has always been this way. And will only continue to be this way.

Of course your girlfriend knew about your mental illness. She reads you easier than any open book. The moment you told her that you were not always onehundred percent happy. And with "not always" you mean never. Hailee began to spend more time with you than she ever did before. You didn't even knew that was possible, but it was.

She started cuddling with you longer. Mumbled I love you's before you fall asleep. Holded you any time she could. Bought more often your favorite snacks. And the list goes on and on.

She made you fall in love with her more and more every day. Like she did with you. But you never really realized this. You were grateful for her and what she was doing for you. Yet there was always that one ulterior motive back in your head.

You're just a burden to her.

......

Today was exhausting. Not physically but mentally. About an hour ago you said to your girlfriend that you were going to go for a walk alone. Whatever you did. You tried to clear your head, enjoy the chirping birds and it worked a little. At least for the first few minutes. After a while you started missing the physical touch of Hailee. Your hand was empty and cold. Maybe it wasn't very smart to be without your comforter on a bad day.

As your eyes started to tear up and your body started trembling, you walked without hesitating back to your and Hailees apartment. Or better said you tried. Breathing was difficult and you strolled slowly.

Finally you saw the door to your home. It felt like several hours before you got here. Thank God you took the key with you. You didn’t want to wake Hailee. She's probably sleeping right now because before you left she said she was already going to bed.

You unlocked the front door and made your way straight to the bedroom. A lightly snoring Hailee filled the room with comfort, exactly what you needed. You took off your shoes and you softly layed onto Hailee. Your head hid in the back of her neck where the sharp note of her perfume stung your nose. It smells like vanilla and cherry blossoms. Like Hailee. Hailee who wasn't really in a deep sleep. She could feel the tears running down your cheeks onto her shoulder. She heard your quiet sobs and above all she felt your body trembling and shaking.

Suddenly you felt her arms wrapping around you and her head slowly turns to yours. She shared you a sweet kiss onto your forehead and afterwards she took the blanket near to her and pull it over you both. You were still shaking from the panic attack you had minutes ago. That's why Hailee softly placed her hands under your hoodie and drew randomly little circles on your back. Her touch was smoothing and it felt like fire on your freezed body.

A little while later your crying became quieter and you calmed down. Hailee and you are still in the same position as before. Only your head moved further down from her shoulder to her chest. Your ear right over her heart. Hailee's heartbeat, which you heard clearly, filled your soul with peace. Your hands wrapped around Hailee's body and her hands wrapped around you. None of you made a sound. You both knew exactly how the other person was feeling right now. Words didn’t have to be spoken. Except those three. Those three words you and Hailee share every day, every hour and always mean it.

"I love you."

She whispered to you. Her voice was raspy and you could hear that she was crying too. Your grip became tighter but also softer at the same time. Which maybe doesn't make any sense at all. But it was true.

You fell deeper into Hailee's touch and again a tear fell from your eye. "I love you too."

You slowly sat back up and looked down at Hailee. "I'm sorry to be such a burden to you, Haiz, I just made you cry and I, I don't want that-" Your body started shaking again and you felt a lump in your throat from holding back the tears. Hailee quickly sat up and placed both of her hands on your cheeks. "Hey, hey, it's okay, I know that you're not feeling well, y/n. And I'm crying because it hurts so much seeing you in this state, I'm not crying because you made me." She comforted you, her hazel eyes meeting yours. And you could definetely tell that she's saying the truth as always. Hailee never lies to you, but your brain told you the complete opposite. "There's literally no difference between making you cry and crying because of my state." "Yes there is!" She shouted, which really surprised you. Hailee never yelled at you before. You looked at her without saying anything. "Sorry." She whispered after realizing. "I'm just- I'm just so worried about you, y/n."

You sighed deeply and lost yourself in her eyes. Eyes that were filled with worries, love and fear. A layer of water was placed over them, which made them shine. "I'm sorry, Haiz." You flustered and you fell again into her arms. She held you tight and you enjoyed the warmth of Hailee's body. She warmed you, and your freezing heart started to melt from the fire of love you both have for eachother.

Warm Love that is bigger than your cold Depression.

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tagging again my dear friend here: @hard-core-super-star

#hailee steinfeld #hailee steinfeld x female reader #hailee steinfield x reader #fanfiction #fluff #fanfic

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honniedonnie · 2 years

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I don't want to wake up! Tighnari x GN!Reader ANGST Pt.2 (two)

Thank you to @persephone-kore-law for this idea

“But imagine if Tighnari somehow got stuck in a samsara, that looping dream thing, he would never want to wake up if it’s about his s/o being alive. Even if he became aware it’s a dream, he doesn’t want to leave”

I changed a few things from the original prompt.

This is part 2 (two) of my Tighnari angst that I wrote.

Masterlist

EDIT: PART 3 (THREE)

TW/CW: Hurt/Little Comfort (not really) mentions death, depression, guilt, hints at an attempt, mentions hallucinations. Yeah, this story does not end happily…

Word count: 572 words

Pronouns: They/Them

Notes: Usage of pet names and (Y/N)’s. I have yet to finish the Archon Quest, so it’s not going to be a samsara, Tighnari’s just gonna eat a hallucinogenic mushroom.

‘It was an accident, it was an accident, it was an accident!’ (Or was it?) "At least that was what he said to himself. Tighnari didn’t mean to ingest an unknown mushroom, he just got curious; there was a mushroom of unknown origin, and as a man of botany, he had to figure out how it affected the body. Yes, for the safety of others, clearly not for his selfish desires to meet his spouse again…right?

“Tighnari, darling, wake up!” A very familiar voice called out his name. ‘Where, where am I? This scent?! Can it be!’ As soon as the very familiar scent reached his nose, he instantly scrambled out of bed. “OH! TIGHNARI!!! You scared me! Are you okay? Did you have a nightmare?” His head was staring at the floor of the room. He doesn’t want to look; he couldn’t no matter how much he wants to, he just doesn’t want to be disappointed. "What's wrong, my love? Are you not feeling well? Should I make a cup of herbal tea? Should I fetch medicine?!" The very familiar voice says with a concerned tone. It was only when the very familiar person who walked up to Tighnari and put their hand on his forehead, that he dared to look up. And there you were… His dead spouse. His true love, the sunlight in his life. "(Y-Y/N)!!!" He couldn’t help it, tears just started running down his face. He hugged you hard. Fearing if he let go, then you would disappear. "Ugh Tighnari, I can't breathe!" "Sorry, I just miss you, I miss you so so much!" His voice wavers "Tighnari, I'm here, I'm right here. You might have had a nightmare. Everything's okay, I'm here, I'm okay. We could stay here, forever" Y/N says with a soft tone, as a way to calm down the green-haired fox person. "I would like that, let's stay here! Forever! I wholeheartedly promise I will protect you with my life" Tighnari confidently boasted. As if saying those words would make him forget the nightmare. Sadly, all dreams have to end…

A bright light invades his vision. "Master Tighnari, you're awake!" "Tighnari are you okay, you had Paimon and the traveler very worried! You're very lucky that we found you. You were dozing off on the trunk of a tree and when we yelled your name, you didn't wake up. The traveler had to carry you to the medical bay. Luckily Collei had a universal antidote that you created!" 'Ahh, that damned antidote.' Tighnari thought. Inside he was furious but also saddened. He was so close, so close to being with his spouse again… "Master Tighnari, I don't mean to pry but, what did you see? In the hallucination, I mean." Collei innocently asked. Tighnari’s face instantly formed a smile, but it was not a real smile. It was never a real smile. He'd never really smile after your death. "Hmm, I don't remember. All I remember is eating the mushroom and waking up here. If I could get some privacy, I can handle myself from here on out." "Oh! Of course! Come on Paimon, Traveler, let's give Master Tighnari some privacy." Ehe, of course! Take care Tighnari, and get well soon!" Paimon yelled when Collei escorted the duo out. Once he couldn’t hear them anymore, he let the tears fall. "I'm sorry my love, it seems I failed to see you…"

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

If you spot any grammar mistakes please let me know, I'll fix them :)

🌺Donnie🌸

#🍯angst #Whoops there's a part 2 #sorry #tighnari #tighnari angst #tighnari x reader #tighnari x gn reader #genshin impact #genshin #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact x gn reader #genshin impact tighnari #genshin tighnari #genshin x reader #genshin x gn reader #angst

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trashandwriting · 2 years

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The bitter INFJ

I think INFJ internet representation is all over the place...Its hard to narrow down the mbti type INFJ into somewhat clear traits and structures, especially because its hard to read them and they are manipulators in a way that they act in a certain way mainly in order to avoid conflict.

However, it's very interesting to see what happens if they don't do that.

If an INFJ stops masking, this can have several reasons: extreme stress (which comes easily for them because even slight changes or small interactions takes a high amount of emotional energy of them), being with people for too long, mental illness, or the rare case that you are even so uninteresting to the INFJ that they don't even bother being friendly to you or in the other case that they like and trust you so much that they stop masking.

Because deep inside, INFJs are rather bitter about the world. The stressful trait to notice a lot of small things makes them see often enough that the effort to be good is either too small to make a change or doesn't get repayed. They try hard to be good because they think how others feel is more important than how they feel themselves, but especially under stress, they can seem dry, bored, not caring, when deep inside, they still care a lot and just cant show it in the moment. INFJs have a very misunderstanding trait that makes them share only a part of what's going on in their head, mainly because its a labyrinth there and they also kinda think that a lot of stuff is just obvious to others when it's not. This creates small conflict that INFJs normally try to avoid: a circle is created, a loop the INFJ has a hard time to escape.

So when all their energy for empathy left their body, an INFJ can in fact get quite cold, or at least seem like that. They also can get sad, depressed, anxious, but won't show it, only to those they are closest too. But it's important to know that something like that could be going on when you interact with an INFJ. They often seem to have a lot of fun and be happy and loving, but as soon as they start disappearing, say they are 'stressed' or their answers get weird or unemotional and somehow off, they may be stuck in their loop and need help they won't ask for.

INFJs are caring people, but often don't get back the amount of love they give. They wonder why this is like that, and think they are weird or bad or unlovable people, and every little misunderstanding manifests these thoughts. If you want to do something good for them, be patient, ask them what's up, be there without judging. When an INFJ thinks they did too many things 'wrong' in an interpersonal way, they will withdraw too and wait for more signs of the other side.

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officiallysoup · 2 years

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it's so interesting that depression is a self fulfilling prophecy. at least for me, when i struggle with depression, it's always a positive feedback loop. for example:

i dont go outside enough -> i get depressed -> i don't go outside a lot -> i get more depressed

i get depressed -> i push people away -> i get more depressed

once i was able to see these patterns i was able to stop getting stuck in that loop, because it is so hard for me to escape them when i did get stuck.

i think it's so entertaining to explore the human psyche and what patterns we tend to create and patterns that naturally occur in our world

#mental health issues #depression

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acoustic-autistic-feedback · 1 year

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So here it goes. I think I'm about ready to disclose all my insecurities, and vulnerabilities and defects to you. Just please know I really hate these things about myself. I acknowledge them and really want to work through them. But I can't alone.

*defects*

I lash out / can't think straight / get stuck in a mental emotion or thought loop, when I am extremely sleep deprived, no relation to the wake up time just the length, somewhat as if you wake someone up abruptly and make them moody. I can overthink allot, and I mean an awfully stupid amount, where I run to stupid conclusions in my head, all of which I know would never happen, but its the struggle of having a really logical sided mind, and finding patterns in things.

If a conversation hits a nerve, I can get stuck in a mental emotional block or loop of some kind. Its like a trigger some what, I've started to see these mood locks somewhat for 3 years now, and I've got allot better. But sometimes my mood will absolutely drop, and I will mentally isolate, I don't properly take in others are saying to me, I may reply but I won't fully take it in to the point of it effecting my thought pattern or judgement of conversation or situation.

My mood can spike extremely high, really really high, its sometimes the same high feeling as taking said serotonin drug. And in that mind space, my brain is firing at full power and creativity, some of the best things I have made are when I feel like this, and sometimes. A song may come on, or someone will say something to me that really hits me, or I watch something. And my mood will extremely plummet, around my lowest level, its why I feel like a bungee cord sometimes.

I think far too much when I'm not mentally distracted, my mind can run a thousand miles an hour when I'm not physically or mentally occupied, its what causes my insomnia. I try my hardest to keep occupied but sometimes I cant and especially more so recently since I haven't had a computer, or having been able to make things :( Its my passion.

I play piano, as a emotional vent somewhat. I feel so many things on a daily and I try to self consolidate allot of the time to keep them in. But sometimes it gets so much I can't express, or think of any words to explain these feelings. So I pour my heart out in playing piano, the only time I can is when I'm not in range of anyone else, and its when I can actually think to create different melodies. Only after I have been sad and then I'm happier, I end up looping those ones. Rather than creating. Its as if extremely high emotions make me become physically creative, however extremely sad emotions make me become auditorily creative.

*vulnerabilities*

I feel vulnerable if someone targets or takes a dig at my autism, I only joke about it with 3 people, my little floof, and my two friends I've known since I was 12. I use to get bullied allot growing up through secondary, allot which really made me depressed and go through self harming. This was way prior to understanding sarcasm.

I only really started to pick up on sarcasm when I was maybe 14/15. And its caused me to overly use it allot, even when I'm not being mean I will jokingly use it but some people wont pick up on it being a jokingly manor

There are more but I have to think on them when they happen.

*insecurities*

I'm self conscious about how I look, my hair, the side of my face, my left arm, my feet, my noise.

I will edit this, and re-post the more I see happen in myself again.

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acid-by-thomas · 1 year

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(just) don't (just) be depressed

The phrase "Just don't be depressed" is regarded as probably one of the default bastard expressions out there. It's a perfectly cut diamond of disconnection from people who struggle mentally and emotionally, and I do think there's a good deal of callousness there, at least in the image it conjures of someone who sees your mental issues as unworthy of discussion.

We often say that "It's not so simple" in response to things like that, and I want to give my thoughts on why we say that in the hopes of finding some understanding between the two:

It's not that simple to just not be depressed because it's hard to feel like the depression isn't you.

I'm not good enough

I don't know if I enjoy this

I hate you

It hurts

Nothing hurts

...I don't know if I feel anything, actually

Everything is just

shapes

When you feel these things, you feel them. They're there.

And there are a lot of feelings you feel about them being there, too. You want them to go away, you want to believe they're not you, but you also want to see if there might be a reason they're there - or want there to be a reason at all, anyways.

Want there to be a reason for suffering, sometimes.

And so this all can feel like you, sometimes all at once.

I suffered from a lot of obsessive-compulsive episodes for a long while - intrusive mantras that I'd get stuck in my mind on loop. A lot of it had to do with personal anxieties about who I was and wanted to be, but it occasionally got scarier than even that.

I'm not entirely sure why I held onto that for so long. Maybe I just didn't think I could get out of it. Or maybe I felt like there was some obligation to letting those patterns play out, that if I messed up I'd let my anxieties take hold and change.

Eventually, though, I found that keeping that around was stupid. It didn't improve me mentally, didn't resolve anything about my suffering. Medication didn't help, either, or at least what I did take didn't.

And so I decided not to humor them anymore. It took a little while, but it stopped being a pattern so much in my mind.

It's unusual to say I don't feel like I have OCD anymore, but there it is. Chances are good, of course, that a lot of what made me obsessive-compulsive is still there, even if it's been turned into a new form of mental difficulty, but at the very least I'm better now, and I know now I can continue to stop humoring those things.

I can't speak to what anyone else is dealing with, but I will say this: Rather than say, "Just don't be depressed", I would encourage, "Don't just be depressed". Maybe that's a small distinction, but I think it's an important one. Don't just be depressed. If you know something about this feels shitty, you have the power to overcome it, even if you're worried you might not. Talk to a psychiatrist and/or a psychologist. Talk to yourself about how you're feeling and see what you can work out. Talk to others you care about. Vent, create, relax, be, stop humoring the shit inside you that you know isn't needed or wanted.

You don't have to just choose to just get over it if you think that's not the right choice, but if you do want to get over it, you'll still have to choose to start somewhere. You can make that choice.

#depression #mental health #self improvement #self awareness #night in the woods #nitw

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venting-views-in-life · 1 year

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"Why am I always the 'weirdo'?"

"What can you see?"

I have been called "weird," "drunkard," "stupid," and "crazy" my whole life. Most of the time, I laugut it off, besides, it is true, except for the drunkard part, of course.

But, there are points where it gets...

too much...

I know, I am a hypocrite, a liar, and a sensitive mother fucker. That's why I don't live my life the same as others. Obviously, this is just my superiority complex talking.

"I don't live my life the same as others." What kind of bullshit is that? I live just as how I see in the world. I am like everyone else. Stuck in a loop. Boring, ain't it?

haha Well then, isn't this sounding like self-pity? Haha well, everyone is like that...

Take two

I want to become an english literature teacher. That is going to be hard because english is not my native language. But everyday, I see other teachers enjoying and dreading what they do.

In this instance, Lee Sunwoo is depressed because he lost someone to another. It is not what you think, unfortunately. What I want to emphasize are these phrases:

"Everyday is the same."

"I'm swept away by the rapids they create, unable to do anything."

Do you know the saying "one man's trash is another man's treasure"? Those words were said in absolute sorrow, but I see it as a beginning of something happy.

#life #manhwa #form of sympathy #opinion #teaching #self pity #i am not what you think i am #no one is #but everyone does #what do you think?

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theomnicode · 2 years

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I don't exactly remember if it was you who thought about Saitama being trapped in time travel loop where he can't actually save the Earth from destruction. Anyways, the first thing that came to my mind was Mogami's arc from Mob Psycho (even though it isn't exactly the same). And then I wondered, what if some superpoweful mind-controling monster made Saitama went through something similar? (Let's forget he can punch through dimensional seals like in Phoenix Man's space) An empty grey world where everything is the same but something changed, the inflexion point: he doesn't have Genos. You can already guess what comes next , he doesn't join the HA, people think he's a cheater, they blame him for the meteor accident... His depression gets worse fueled by his loneliness and the ingratitude he receives. I know this is the typical build of villain Saitama au, but when he's at the edge of falling into the dark side he hears Genos calling him "sensei". At first he doesn't know where that voice comes from but his conscience keeps telling him he' missing someone very important. And when he finally remembers Genos he realizes how lucky he is to have him around and that he should value more his own feelings. That way he snaps back to reality and breaks away the mental prision he's been stuck in and wakes up in the middle of the battlefield. He kills the monster and Genos runs to him worried and startled that his sensei seems happier than usually. And Saitama doesn't say anything, but he knows his feelings are back, at least a bit.

OMG, this ended up being a whole fanfic XD

Sorry for the late answer!

That's a pretty darn cool idea and probably not at all unrealistic, since it's a formula ONE has used before.

I think you're refering to this post of groundhog day inspired by Majora's mask? Where the moon falls down and destroys earth?

I honestly thought that since we got time travel, we might as well have fun with it hah.

And if I am honest about superpowered mind-controlling monster?

He does fit the bill. Very well in fact.

If anything has been exhibited about OPM God's powers, is that they've always been affecting the consciousness.

He's a being who cannot be seen via normal means and only subconsciously. Even when he comes out of the dimensional space he resides in and his power creates thunderstorms to appear, his form cannot be perceived via normal means. Even Saitama only barely perceives him via subliminal messages like voices.

And the only time people seem to be able to perceive OPM God is within their consciousness or when they are in altered state of consciousness like Tatsumaki was barely awake. It would seem that God just resides in a higher plane of existence and there are hints towards God's non-physical form residing in the spiritual plane of all places.

That is, realm of the dead. Heaven, essentially. Not unlike the biblical god.

We did get a confirmation in CE and Phoenixman fight that the spiritual plane does exist and then Garou's spirit also made an appearance.

Then what OPM God did to Garou...it wasn't pretty. It was mind control, plain and simple. A bit more subtle than that but essentially yea.

And now that future Garou died...it begs the question that if OPM God resides in the spiritual plane...is Garou's soul even safe? What happened to his soul?

I have thought about this before and the Sanzu river mentioned by Zombieman and some easter eggs in OPM game and I have a feeling we'll find out at some point. Because God did not manage to do to future Garou what he did to Homeless Emperor after all.

Garou did die, but the way he died was distinctly different from HE. I hypothesise that Garou turned HIMSELF into salt to ward off evil, because otherwise God would just kill him and take his life anyway.

The interesting part though is that God just...kind of let this happen anyway.

Why didn't it just instantly suck out Garou's life? I can only hypothesise that Garou dying and Saitama learning time travel and going back still serves it's purposes. That it was meant to happen all along.

However, it means that if God resides in the spiritual plane, then Garou dying can still achieve a purpose.

There's one thing about the God's mural which references to the Aztecs, the temple shape itself.

The rationale for Aztec human sacrifice was, first and foremost, a matter of survival. According to Aztec cosmology, the sun god Huitzilopochtli was waging a constant war against darkness, and if the darkness won, the world would end. The keep the sun moving across the sky and preserve their very lives, the Aztecs had to feed Huitzilopochtli with human hearts and blood.

And then I was tickled a bit about what Joe Rogan mentioned about the aztecs. And their religious practices.

"The aztecs used to burn people when they were alive to really like freak them out. And then take their brains out and eat their brains. Because of all the hormones and all the things that were going on. But they found it gave them you know, whatever superhuman strenght or religious ecstacy."

In short, it probably slurps the life out of people's physical bodies and then noms the souls. And probably get more powerful that way. Phoenixman gives some good and apt metaphors about how God seems to be working in general. A depiction of Hungry ghost Preta.

I bet the more powerful the person is and the higher they can reach by stretching their limitations, the more powerful their soul is and by taking that power, it can get stronger.

Chances are, the Limiter is just a limiter to the power in that person's soul.

And there's probably a connection somewhere deep down in the lizard brain, the pineal gland. We've had some depictions of brain works before when Psykos merged with Orochi.

In the epithalamus of some species of amphibians and reptiles, it is linked to a light-sensing organ, known as the parietal eye, which is also called the pineal eye or third eye.[8] René Descartes believed the human pineal gland to be the "principal seat of the soul."

Anyways

If God is able to affect the consciousness and behaviour of people and also suck the life (read: soul) out of them by staring...who knows what happens when it gets even more power or there are more cracks in the dimensional seal.

Who knows what kind of mind fuckery it can exert upon people?

And since it created the limiters on humankind, there's probably no limits as to what it can do itself.

It is not to be underestimated.

#opm #one punch man #asks #opm god #mind control #opm manga panels #spiritualism #aztecs #human sacrifice

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br0k3nc4g3 · 1 month

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hey guys! Sorry still inactive, I'm using a 100 year old disfunctional tablet instead onmy actual one for personal and very complex reasoning! But I have good and bad news.

Good news: I'm still alive, I have many MANY more ideas, I'll go back to art eventually and maybe even animatics, I have more ideas for characters, when I'm ready (which may be years from now) I'll release pilot episodes.

Bad news: I'm currently stuck in a loop where I'm stuck with ideas but give them up, I'm not coming back for a while, can't animate yet, out of good non-copyrighted ideas, obsessed with things and staying out of track, behind in school, going through some depression and stress (I KNOW IM EMO BUT ACTUAL PERSONAL STUFF IS GOING ON, SORRY BOUT THE CAPS)

If you have any ideas, I'll add them to a draft an once I get enough that I like I'll put them in a poll than select one and credit you while I base stuff off of it, but don't think it your fault if I give up in it! Again: I'm indecisive and have been disapproving of a lot of things I come up with, if you would like to participate in this make sure to just create a paranormal and/or supernatural plot, nothing more, can even be one sentence.

CONSIDER THIS AS AN EVENT! DROP YOUR IDEAS IN COMMENTS AND REBLOGS! STAY UP TO DATE ON MY ACCOUNT IF YOU WANT TO SEE IF YOU MAKE IT TO THE POLL, MAKE SURE YOU DONT VOTE FOR YOURSELF AND THANK YOU!

KEEP READING TO EXPLORE MY OWN IDEAS WHICH I'LL ADD TO A SEPERATE POLL! (PLEASE DO NOT COPY OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT, IF YOU SEE I'VE BEEN COPIED NOTIFY ME AS SOON AS POSSIBLE)

A man discovers his daughter has been obsessed with the piano to an unhealthy point, even playing the most eerie sounding music you could ever hear, seeming to have just developed this talent out of nowhere. He then discovered that something much worse than obsession with creepy tunes is behind this.

A boy with religious trauma drowns mysteriously one night, his sister grieving badly, hearing and seeing him only to discover she wasn't just grieving badly to a point of her insanity but being manipulated by a horrible side of his undead spirit.

A non-sacrificial cult leader is poisoned, a man working at the carnival is crushed dy a ferris wheel, and a Catholic girl is murdered only to become demons ghosts and fallen angels, but the one dealing with their presence realizes they aren't the ones causing her problems.

#emo #event #ideas #ideas needed #i need ideas #i need inspiration #i need inspo #inspiration #inspo #action #Somewhatsad user #(Vivienne is only in here cause she inspired me to make a series instead of memes)#vivienne medrano #Br0k3nc4g3 user

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free--therapy · 5 months

Note

Anon here!

Just something I wanna ask: from your perspective, is it very clear that I've just simply made very small things into big problems by digging deeper and deeper into them?

I mean, from your standpoint, do you think all this misery I've created for myself is simply a result of overthinking very small things into much bigger problems?

And if you think that way, then can I think like that too? I mean, can I believe that these are just small thought that I can and should let go of and move on from?

Because when I have a clear mind (which is very rare these days), I can think how someone else might respond to these thoughts and I realise how I'm just ruminating unnecessarily.

But most times when I'm stuck in that overthinking loop (which is me the majority of the time these days), I end up thinking "my worry is much more complex"

So like, when I tell myself "Think about how your sister might respond to these same thoughts" but when I try to believe that, my mind goes "But she doesn't have an anxiety problem like you so that method works for you. But maybe it won't for me"

This is mainly because at its core, the way to get out of this whole web seems pretty simple, right? But as simple as it sounds, it isn't as easy in practice.

But please tell me this, the seemingly simple way to think of respond (like people around me without the anxiety problem do), can that way/method work for me too?

I mean, if I share one of my worries (what ifs and such) about the past or future with my sister, she might think about it for a moment then go "well whatever, no need to think about it so much. it's just a thought. leave it and focus on the present"

That sounds simple enough right? But can I apply that to myself too? I mean, can I think like that and believe that too?

Because since in my mind, I've given SO MUCH power to the thoughts by constantly thinking and picturing them in my head. Like replaying the thoughts again and again trying to think my way out that everything seems like such a huge problem....like a huge mountain to cross.

So such a laidback or "chill" perspective like my sister's or anyone else's, is it okay if I think from that perspective too?

Because I keep feeling like they can only think like that because they don't have mental health concerns. I keep feeling, "I can't use that perspective because I have an anxiety problem so that perspective won't work for me."

So let me ask you this, is that inner monologue my mind gives me wrong after all?

Can I think, believe and act just like others? I mean, can their simple clear perspectives work for me too? Or am I too far gone to apply simpler perspectives now?

This is one of my fears you know?

I think "Ooh what about this one thing I did? What does it mean? What if it means I'm (insert whatever xyz concern here)? What if it makes me a bad person? What if it's a crime and makes me a criminal? What if this concern won't ever go away until I do something about it? What if I keep having thoughts about it? What if it means I have this specific xyz disorder? What if it means I'm abnormal?"

And even worse "What if these thoughts won't ever stop bothering me? What if they lead me to worse depression?" And a LOT of other thoughts too. Each topic goes deeper and deeper with the worries until that topic becomes a huge problem. (By topic I mean like "me watching that content" is a topic and a million different what ifs about it are the worries about it. Similarly, there are many many other topics too)

Anyway, so all these thoughts, if I ask my sister, she might say "I'm thinking too much and I don't need to get so deep into every minute thing or possibility." She might ask me to focus on other things in my present that actually matter.

But my mind goes "She can say that because she doesn't have a problem like me" which is true but suppose she gives me a clear, simple perspective over these worries, even if I like that perspective, will it help me or can I believe that perspective?

I mean, she can think from that perspective because she's mentally healthy. But can someone who's not as mentally healthy like me still believe and use that perspective too? Or will it not work for me?

Because my thoughts get too complex after which, whenever I try to simplify the situation in my mind, my mind goes "Is it really that simple? What about the other possibilities then? Can you really just take such a simple perspective on it and not think about all the other possibilities?"

Basically, my anxiety makes me think there's a difference between me and other people who have healthier mental states. So something that they can have a simple straight forward perspective on maybe won't work for me?

But I want to believe it will. Because after all, if these are just thoughts then anyone I share them with can share their perspectives on it with me right? And I can believe and apply their perspectives to these thoughts if their ways seem healthier than mine right?

So what do you think? Do we need to simplify the situation and get outside the web? Or rather, can we? Is that okay for us too? Can we believe in the simple way/perspective too?

Thank you!

Hey Anon!

From my experience and from interacting with all sorts of people on a fairly daily basis, I've come to the conclusion that pretty much EVERYONE has an anxiety problem. Some people hide it better than others (or are in denial of it) and some people are better equipped to handle it, but I don't actually believe that people don't struggle with some form of anxiety in their life. Anxiety is technically a survival mechanism, so it's something we need to survive every day. That being said, even though your sister may be coming off as "chill" and not having an anxiety problem, is she actually addressing the thoughts or is she dismissing them because they're not /her/ problems? It's definitely easier to dismiss other people's worries without giving them any help or advice to ease their mind (something that used to bother me a lot too).

As someone who used to easily get stuck in loops of ruminating thoughts, yes, I absolutely believe that you can reach a point where a thought doesn't bother you as much as they do right now. Right now you feel powerless to your thoughts because the people around you are so quick to dismiss them as something to not worry about, but they leave you helpless and without the tools you need to overcome them just like they do. Right now you are just unskilled with helping yourself, which means you'll need to build the skills to achieve the outcome you want.

No, you are most definitely not too far gone! Learning how to challenge your negative thoughts and see things more objectively is possible for anyone who wants it bad enough, no matter how old or young you are. If someone can learn a language at 50 or how to cook at 13, you can learn the skill of overcoming your anxious thoughts where you are right now. I'm 33 and even though I did therapy from age 24 to 30, I didn't learn how to fully implement these skills until I was in my 30s and going through my divorce. That doesn't necessarily mean it'll be the same outcome for you, but it was my fault for waiting so long to take action with all the knowledge I acquired. There's definitely hope for you, Anon :) And yes, you can definitely get outside of the web and into a clearer mindset.

#ask #answered #anon #anxiety #rumination #overthinking #anxious thoughts #mental health

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iykykman · 7 months

Text

9.29.23

Studies show that men suffer more after divorce, and children are affected by an increased risk of substance abuse, depression, and bad conduct. And what about women? What about the mothers who have suffered years of emotional neglect and sub-par communication? Do the studies show that women after divorce thrive in their lives, careers, and self-esteem?

I've been stuck in this loop for four years. There are only two choices to make: leave, start over, or turn a new leaf. Be selfish for once and say enough is enough, lend my shoulder for my child to cry on as her world as she knows it ends, and pick up the pieces as we go. Or stay, and keep suffering so as to not disrupt my husband's life or risk my child becoming a delinquent. I am torn and I feel pity for myself. Not strong enough to leave, not strong enough to stay. Where the hell do I go?

I've tried it all. I've put so much effort into saving this marriage, sometimes it was only me alone carrying our weight. Like when I had our baby. I was completely and utterly alone. I woke every 3 hours during the night to breastfeed while he usually slept but sometimes he was awake playing video games. He worked during the day while I stayed home caring for our baby, playing with her, teaching her, feeding her, and helping her hit milestones. I'd have dinner on the stove by 5pm sharp, and he'd come home.. shower... and play video games. All while me and baby lived life around him. PPD hit me like a semi-truck and I was alone in that too, he didn't even try. In my most vulnerable state, he took advantage of me, cheated me, and wore me down to my bones.

The years that followed didn't get any better. Screaming arguments, nasty name calling, financial trouble, and we even got physical sometimes. What kills me is that she was there for it all. She watched us. I cry myself to sleep most nights, begging the universe to save her from the fate that I suffered. But as I see it, she's going down the same path of watching her parents shred each other to pieces, all the while being told that they loved each other. I watched my parents fight every day growing up, and I have to admit that I have no idea how to do marriage or even love. I watched my mother pack her bags every other month threatening to leave both me and my dad. I watched my dad lose his sanity trying to please a woman who wasn't even interested in the life that she created. My mother held a knife up to my neck the day I revealed to her that I wanted to die, at oh I don't know, maybe 12 years old. In that same house, I walked into my dad trying to hang himself with a belt from their ceiling fan after a heated argument. I'm serious, I have never seen a depiction of a normal family or a normal marriage. I have only ever known toxicity.

And then one has to wonder how much of it is their own fault. How many of my own marital issues have I caused due to the lack of knowledge and a good example? I'm sure there's a long list of ways that I could have been a better partner and a better parent. However, the only thing I know to be true is that I tried so painfully hard. And five years later, there is no fruit on this tree. And I don't know why. I don't know if maybe I didn't water it enough, or the soil wasn't rich in nutrients, or maybe pests. I simply don't know.

I need to cut this short, got to go find more statistics.

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6rookie-writer0110 · 3 years

Text

Let's make a playlist of your favorite songs

Cassie Lang x Male Reader Stark

Request - Can you do Cassie lang x Stark!reader where he and cassie are the same age since they are born in 2007 and should be 16 in 2023. R is Tony's son and survived the snap. Before the snap he was best friend with Peter and ned when he was like a kid and the three of them hang out. Plue Y/n and peter do like spiderman ideas. After the snap he was living with Tony, pepper, and his little sister in the lakeside cabin. In the year 2021 he got bitten by a radioactive spider but has an alchemax logo and number 42.

Since you were a toddler you have been friends with Peter and Ned. Always together playing together. Even during high school, you didn't lose your friendship with Ned and Peter. You have always been into creating music and art, sometimes you would like to tag the buildings and the trains. Only, Peter and Ned knew they are your supporters.

Sometimes you and Peter would do parkour. You and Peter have sketchbooks and notes of being a hero and being called ’Spiderman’

You, Peter, and Ned never left each other side. People always saw you three spend time together all the time.

-----

Spring 2018... 50% of the population disappeared. The older you got, you started to study what happened during the fight against Thanos. You collected notes, hacked into your father’s computer and his friends’ computers then into Shields.

You survived the snap when you found out what happened it broke you. You cried when Peter didn't survive, or when your dad is stuck in space. You would spend hours in your father’s lab and look at his stuff.

”Y/N, I knew you would be here. You are like Tony can work on something for hours or days” Pepper said.

She put her hand on your shoulder.

”I miss him and Peter,” You said.

”I miss them too. You should see Ned, he came by earlier” Pepper said.

You nod.

”I will go see him. *sighed heavily* I want Thanos to suffer” You said.

”One day he will,” Pepper said and she kissed your head.

Later, you went to see Ned. Ned did give you new ideas for your spiderman gadgets so it won't break half of the time. You and Ned start to work together on it.

✬ ✫ ✯ ✬

The year 2021...

You walked through the alley for a short cut. You dropped your cell phone, you bend down to pick up. You stood up and checked your phone while walking you hit a web. You tried to get rid of the web and you didn't notice the radioactive spider crawl on your shoulder and bite your neck.

”What the hell?” You yelled.

You rub your neck then noticed the radioactive spider on your forearm. You noticed the spider has an alchemax logo and number 42.

”You are coming home with me” You mumbled.

You went home and straight to the lab. You put the spider in a small tank and watched it move around.

-----

The next day you woke up feeling strange. You couldn't explain it, you are in shock just seeing electricity go through your hands. You start to breathe hard and your heart started to beat fast. You go to the bathroom to wash your face suddenly you turned invisible.

”I have powers!” You yelled.

Your mood changed, now you are happy that you have powers. You always dreamt of being a hero and having powers, you couldn't stop smiling. You called Ned and told him to meet you at your house. Ned did help you figure out what kind of powers you have.

----

You stare at your father’s suits and you thought about using them. But you wanted to make your identity as a hero, you want to give people hope again.

the first suit you made with Ned it's an armored suit. Ned helped you pick out the colors red, white, and black. When Ned saw you wearing the armor suit, he freaked out.

”Dude, it's awesome! You will be the coolest hero ever” Ned said.

”Thanks. I can't wait to go to the city and start saving people” You said.

You and Ned high five each other. You go to the city and start saving people. Everyone started to talk about the new hero on tv and the Internet, you felt proud of yourself.

✬ ✫ ✯ ✬

Being a hero wasn't easy for you. You found out working alone is hard, some people didn't like what you are doing. Other people do cheer for you. Balancing life and being a hero is very hard. But you got an idea and you worked day and night to make the app called ’Friendly Neighborhood 1.0’

People can report crimes and you will go save them and keep you in the loop, what happens in the city.

Today is slow and no one is in trouble. You decided to go tag some places. You swing to an abandoned building, you take out the spray cans, and started to draw. You stopped to put on your headphones then you started to draw again. Once you are finished you took pictures then tagged the subways.

----

You got an alert on your app, gang gun shoots in downtown. You started to swing fast and you see people caught in the crossfire. You started to venom blast to fight them and you used your web to take their guns away. You noticed the boy is deaf and you started to do sign language and he smiled.

”You know sign language?” Cassie asked.

You nod. ” Yes. I thought to learn so I can communicate with someone who is deaf”

You asked questions to the boy and you're glad he isn't hurt.

”I’m Cassie and this is Roger,” Cassie said.

”I’m Spiderman,” You said and it in sign language.

Later on...

You and Cassie became friends. She found out your secret when your mask fell apart while fighting Kraven the Hunter. Sometimes you would swing to her place to see her. She would always smile when you're around.

---

Cassie noticed you set a spider-free and didn't kill it.

”I hate spiders I don't know how you stand them,” Cassie said.

”it was a harmless spider. I don't feel scared when bugs are around” You said.

”I hate all kinds of bugs. But it's cute, you liking bugs and not killing them, bug boy” Cassie smiled.

You laughed and smiled back at her.

”Bug boy?” You asked.

She nods.

”Your new nickname” Cassie giggled.

”Thanks for the nickname?” You giggled.

”Anytime, Y/N” Cassie smiled.

~The next day~

Cassie went to your house. She met Pepper then Cassie goes to your bedroom. Cassie didn't say anything, she watches you make beats and you started to sing, you have your headphones on. She kept watching you and you keep making beats. She tapped your shoulder and you looked up, your eyes opened wide.

”Cas!” You said too loud.

”Hi Bug boy. You are talented” Cassie said.

”Thanks. Sorry, I didn't hear you come in” You said.

”So, you're into music?” Cassie asked.

”Yes, also I'm into art. If you want I-I-I can show you my work” You said shyly.

”I will like to see it, Y/N,” Cassie said.

”Cool!” You said.

You grabbed your sketchbook and she starts to look at your art.

✬ ✫ ✯ ✬

The year 2022

You told Cassie you wanted to upgrade and design a new suit. Again Cassie caught you making beats this time you teach her how to make beats.

”This is fun, Y/N,” Cassie said.

”I’m happy that you're enjoying making beats,” You said.

”Y/N aren't you scared when you swing around the city?” Cassie asked.

”At the very beginning, I was terrified when I would swing and jump from extremely tall buildings. Much later on, the fear went away so I'm not scared anymore. If you want you can swing with me around the city” You said.

”Okay. That would be an interesting experience, but yeah let's do it. Oh, I got an idea how your suit can look” Cassie said.

”Tell me,” You said.

Cassie started to explain how your suit should look with what colors. Music is the main inspiration for your suit 2020.

----

You are standing on the roof with Cassie. She wrapped her arms around you very tight.

”Ready?” You asked.

”Y-yes,” Cassie said.

You hold her tight and you start to swing. Cassie’s heart is beating faster and faster, you feel her grip tighten. You keep swinging and you noticed how scared she is. You stopped on top of the hotel building.

”Are you okay?” You asked.

She put her hand on her chest.

”No!” Cassie yelled.

You laughed and she smacked your arm.

”I’m guessing you had fun?” You teased.

”I got scared halfway. I thought I was going to fall, I don't know you get used to that” Cassie said.

”Takes time. I got over my fear the more I started to swing” You said.

”I won't do it again,” Cassie said and you laughed.

----

Cassie is sick and you went to buy soup for her. You knocked on her window, she opened it and let you in then you take off the mask.

”I got this for you, Cassie,” You said.

”Thank you, Y/N” Cassie smiled.

”Cassie, I know we been friends for a while but I really like you a lot and I hope we can be more than friends,” You said.

”Y/N, I like you too a lot. I would kiss you but I don't want you to get sick” Cassie said.

You smiled and she sneezed.

You and Cassie do spend time together mostly watching tv or movies. Cassie finds it sweet that you're taking care of her. You gave her medicine and reheat the soup. Later, you and Cassie do play board games, video games and asked questions about each other.

You noticed Cassie has in her bedroom for a while. You go upstairs and you can hear her crying

You sit next to her on the bed ”Cas, what's wrong?”

”I miss my dad so much” Cassie cried.

You wrapped your arms around her and she starts to cry more. You rub her back and you listen to her.

You did try to make her feel better worked for a little bit, but she is still feeling depressed. You stayed with her all-day

✬ ✫ ✯ ✬

Finally, your 2020 suit is complete. You can't stop smiling and start to put on the suit. The led mask, you loved it when Cassie told you about it. You got an alert on your app

”Time to test out the suit,” You said.

”Be careful, Y/N” Cassie said.

”I will,” You said.

Cassie watched you swing away.

You were busy saving people, Doctor Octopus and Kraven the Hunter kidnapped Cassie. They sent you a message and you got angry. You started to swing rapidly to Doctor Octopus’s lab. Cassie is tied up in a chair and she is feeling terrified.

You start to fight them. You used venom blast to punch Kraven, then Doctor Octopus grabbed you. Kraven punched you then you kicked him in the face and you used your web to cover Doctor Octopus’s face. You turned invisible and you started to fight them.

----

You grabbed Cassie and left the lab. You stopped on a roof and she hugged you tight then she smacked your chest.

”What was that for?!” You yelled.

”You know I hate it,” Cassie said.

”I’m not a speedster. I had to swing us away from them” You said.

You take off the mask.

”I know but I still hate it,” Cassie said.

Cassie started to ramble on then you did the same ramble on. She kissed you and you kiss her back, you and Cassie pulled apart and smiled. It's the first kiss.

✬ ✫ ✯ ✬

Time Skip~

Everything changed for the best. You found out Tony came back from space, you ran to him and hugged him.

”I missed you, dad,” You said

He kissed your head and held you tight.

”I love you 3000, Y/N,” Tony said.

Peter came back and he hugged you and Ned. Ned told everyone by mistake you are dating Cassie. No one knew about the relationship just yet.

”Sorry, bro,” Ned said.

”When we will get to meet her, Y/N,” Tony said.

”Soon, dad. Don't worry about it, Ned” You said.

You celebrated with everyone and you can't stop smiling.

----

You and your family moved to the woods, now live in a cabin. Now it feels like a family and you don't want that to change. Your little sister started to scream and ran towards Pepper.

”Why do you have a pet spider?” Tony asked.

”I hate spiders,” Morgan said.

Pepper was going to kill your pet but you stopped her.

”Stop!” You yelled.

The spider is in your hands.

”The spider is my pet. I got used to him being around” You said.

”Y/N, I will never understand why. But please just keep him in the cage” Pepper said.

”I will,” You said.

You go to your bedroom and put the spider in the tank. You feed him and just watch him.

✬ ✫ ✯ ✬

Date Night...

You arrived with pizza and she kissed you. You and Cassie played videos and it became competitive. You were going to take her out, but there is a rainstorm. The night is going well, she is having fun with you. You and Cassie eat pizza and started to debate what is the best movie and worst movie.

Later, you and Cassie started to play Uno but you and Cassie argued about the rules. You and Cassie eat more pizza and tried to play Uno again. Later, you and Cassie watched a movie on the couch, but end up falling asleep.

----

Scott found out what happened, he is in shock. He rushed home and knocked on the door. Cassie opened the door, they start to cry and they hugged each other. You did spend the night at her place, then Cassie introduces you to Scott.

“Wait, you're Tony’s son!?” Scott said.

“Yeah, I'm his son,” You said.

“Hurt my daughter and I will go after you,” Scott said.

“Dad!” Cassie yelled.

“I won't break her heart,” You said.

“I will keep my eye on you, Y/N,” Scott said.

“UGH!” Cassie mumbled.

Later, Scott joined you and Cassie for breakfast.

---

Later, you meet up with Peter to show him your 2020 suit. Peter is loving the suit and asked many questions about how you build your suit. You and Peter worked together to save people.

#cassie lang #cassie lang x reader #Cassie lang x male reader #Cassie Lang imagine #marvel x male reader #marvel imagine

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mbti-notes · 1 year

Text

Anon wrote: INFP here. Probably in a loop. I've got a boyfriend, don't have many friends, not welcomed by family members and busy studying for exams. I feel like shit. On the verge of crying every second, or exploding. As soon as I wake up I just feel scared, anxious, unstable, like I need to break out of a jail but I don't know how. I've had depression and social anxiety in the past; I was able to break out of it but I'm afraid it's coming back. I can't afford therapy now, but I think my boyfriend will pay for it if I ask.

I'd like for you to give me advice on one thing: I'm stuck in the past. I try to live in the present as much as I can, but things happen everyday that remind me I was happier in the past. I lost a person that I considered my future, they're not even themselves anymore, and my whole idea of the future shattered after that. I can't dream anymore, or enjoy what I'm doing, because the pain is just too much every second. If I can't instantly create a new situation where I feel as safe as I used to feel, I'm afraid I'll be stuck like this forever. I don't care what kind of situation, I don't care about what I need to do, I'll do anything -- I just fucking want to be okay. I'm never okay. Please, help me.

-----------------

I get that you just want to be okay but the issues you're raising don't have quick fixes. It sounds like you've left problems festering for quite some time and there might be many factors that have to be addressed to get you back on the right track.

1) Immediate Help: It sucks that you have to, but you shouldn't put a price on your health. If you really need to speak with a professional, find a way to make it happen, and worry about the cost later. Many schools provide free mental health services, start there. Some cities have free or low cost mental health services, so look into them. You can also search for online services in your country if you live in a remote area.

2) Medium-Term Development: You seem to be bottling up a lot of feelings and emotions and now reaching some kind of breaking point. This indicates that you haven't been attending properly to your emotional health for far too long. If you had a good habit of caring for your feelings and emotions, you would have listened to them earlier on, and they wouldn't have reached this desperate state. Depending on the underlying cause of your emotional problems, there are a lot of things you can learn for improving your emotional intelligence and ameliorating negative emotions, such as: mindfulness, reframing, big-picture thinking, assertiveness, adaptability, creativity, time management, planning/organization, service and devotion, etc. See the articles about Emotional Health and the related books on the resources page.

3) Long-Term Development: Being stuck in the past is an indication of Si loop, which requires Ne development. Wanting to blow up your life due to lack of self-care is an indication of Te grip, which requires restoration of dominant Fi. These concepts are already explained in the study guides, please read them. As for restoring healthy Fi, the first thing you should remember is that it's okay to not be okay. Have empathy and compassion for yourself. The recovery process cannot truly begin until you get back in touch with yourself, pay proper attention to your emotional needs, and treat yourself as deserving of love and care.

#infp #si loop #te grip #ask

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hologramcowboy · 2 years

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Hi! I love this blog. Probably the most legit one I’ve seen so far. I’d like to say a thing tho, I’ve met Jared and Jensen a few years back and I swear to god, Jensen was the nicest person I’ve met. He gets a total different attitude on stage, he seems to be a lot more confident than when you meet him off stage, he’s really humble. Now, with that being said, I know him being linked to Danneel (Never had a good feeling about her, but since I don’t know her I’m not going to judge much) doesn’t do too good for his imagine, but I really got a good impression about him. And I may have an explication for him being with her, because a very similar situation happened with my brother, he was stuck in a relationship where none of us (family) liked the person he was with. My brother has some good family values, they talked about having children (they already moved in together). We never liked her, she was very needy and always wanted to spend lots of money(my brother,s, cause she didn’t have a job). And my brother was stuck in this loop where he always said her “yes” or she would’ve give him a hell of a time. They’ve been together for almost 6 years…he never thought of leaving her. She made him move near her family, didn’t let him see his friends,didn’t want him to spent too much time with us family, she made him change jobs to have more money…Still, never a single time he thought of leaving her. He was in love and he really was “happy” to become a more stabile figure for her and the family they wanted to create. Then suddenly she started to avoid him, and he found out she was cheating on him, and they (finally)broke up.

I know this was such a long story, sorry, but I really think Jensen is kinda stuck in this situation, where he has children with her, they have a business together..the divorce is going to be really hard since she doesn’t really “Own” much. Do you know how many money he should give her if they divorce? LOTS! so I really think he kinda stay back from whatever she does or she would totally give him a hell of a time.

This is my personal opinion, cause as I told before, when I met him he seemed like a pretty great guy! No bad feelings.

Yes, Jensen shines on his own and he connects with people in special ways, there are countless stories about this and his audience loves him very much. He just has a bit of an image problem branding wise(from an industry standpoint) to fix but I'm sure he'll get it sorted.

Sounds like your brother had a co-dependent relationship and it seems he was the one who truly loved and got stabbed in the back. I am sorry you all experienced that, Anon.

It's true, divorce would been diving assets and all of that but I think Jensen should go for being happy. His kids will thrive with him being happy instead of depressed, I don't think they'd want him suffering even if now they are too little to understand. It's better to live through divorce than live in a toxic household. That's just how I feel about divorce, I don't see bad in it because I believe people should be happy and if they aren't on the same frequency any longer, there no point in prolonging suffering because, at an unconscious level, everyone in the family can feel what's happening anyway so it's actually worse to hide things and carry on pretending.

Of course, ultimately, we don't know the dynamics, we can only wish him and his loved ones the best. Thank you for the comment about the blog. ❤️

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