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honeycreamsweets · 2 years

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⭐️Fading Star (Part 2)⭐️

Miya Atsumu x gender neutral reader

(You/yours and they/them for reader)

All angst. (Only small comfort)

Mentions- Reader is still heartbroken. And is uncomfortable. Atsumu still has no idea of their feelings. He lacks self-awareness of how he treats Reader. Small confrontations but nothing intense. Akaashi is a good boy and Sakusa got a lil attitude. Crying. Lots hugs. Some cursing?? Pet names and reader is angry internally. Sad Atsumu. Both are kinda shitty to each other. Unrequited feelings and realizing you're too late to fix this.

Word count- 4100

Notes- Had a bad weekend!!! Someone made me cry and feel awful so you guys get to feel awful with me<3 we suffer together. Anyway. I originally wasn't going to do a part 2. I had a weird time trying to figure out a part 2 until it hit me and then I've kinda been nonstop writing for the last two days. No beta reader cause I don’t have one but I’m sorry about mistakes! Enjoy !

Part one

The drive back home from his game was so painful. He set it in stone that you were a backup friend for his relationships. Your friendship would never be the same. Days turned into weeks. Weeks turned into months. The pain from losing your star lingered but it dulled over time. It became easier to distract yourself from the bleeding light that Atsumu left in your life. It washed over you in waves. Some days it was easier to say you were over it. And other days, it hurt to see him in passing. You made a vow to yourself to enjoy being a distant observer of someone’s star. You’d find a better star. Maybe.

It was four months until Atsumu’s and his partner’s first anniversary. You endured the friendship and stayed readily available for him. These feelings were bottled up within you. You tried to speak up during those months. Atsumu shot you down before he could be even considered your point of view.

“We don’t hang out anymore. You don’t talk to me or your other friends. I miss you and I’m glad you’re with someone who makes you happy but you’re neglecting everyone else. You rushed in-“

You were cut off by his annoyed groan. “Not you too…” he mumbled under his breath. “Listen, y/n. I’m doing things I haven’t done before. You should be happy for me. We can hang out later. I’ve done my part to keep my friends so. Just learn to be happy for me. That’s what I would do for you.” His demeanor was defensive and it only made you feel worse. Maybe you were a terrible friend..? You should have been happy for him..! But you couldn’t find it in yourself to do that. You changed the topic and never tried to talk about it again. You didn’t tell anyone else, fearing that someone would discover your feelings. You bottled up your sad feelings over that star and hid them from the world.

You received an invitation from Atsumu to hang out since his partner was out for the day. You debated on if it was a good idea to see him for a long period. He never made time for you. He was shitty at messaging you back unless he needed something. He wasn't even half the friend he was before. But alas. That dumbass had your heart wrapped around his finger even if time had passed. You agreed while your inner thoughts were begging you to not go. You knew it’d only cause you to regress.

But you wanted to see your- their star.

A small moment of relief occurred when you saw the other parked cars of his teammates and friends outside of his apartment. You sighed softly as you walked to his floor. Sounds of Bokuto’s and Atsumu’s muffled yells could be heard through the door. Normally, you would have smiled to hear them being so loud. It was difficult to mask the dull ache from your yearning over Miya Atsumu. You softly knocked on the door and exhaled sharply before practicing a smile. You were greeted by Hinata suddenly. “Y/N!!!!!” He yelled while trapping you in a tight hug.

The sounds of his laughter and your pleas to be set free drew the attention of the others. Atsumu walked to the door to see you engulfed in a hug. “Heyyy, Y/n! Good to see y-” He was interrupted by Bokuto shoving him aside. The tight hug became even tighter as Bokuto joined in. Atsumu chuckled as he watched. He opened his arms to join in the big bear hug. “Damn, I invited ‘em over and you guys are acting like that’s your best friend.”

You smiled sheepishly as you were squished between the two men. He hadn't called you that in a long time... The second you saw Atsumu approaching while still calling you his best friend, you panicked. You poked at Hinata’s and Bokuto’s sides until they let go. You didn’t want to be suspicious but you didn’t want to make the effort to hug him. If you had his teammates as a barrier. He didn’t deserve a hug in your eyes. “Hi, it’s good to see you guys.” You spoke quickly. “Who else is here?” You asked as you stepped into the apartment.

Atsumu frowned at not receiving a hug. “Omi, Keiji, and Rin,” He said as he glanced at Hinata and Bokuto in question. The other two men shrugged and glanced between each other. Atsumu followed you inside. To his disbelief, he saw you embrace Suna, Akaashi, AND Sakusa before him. You always made sure to put him first. Why pull this now? “Oh, and Samu will be here to drop off —---.” He raised a brow in question at Sakusa, who had his arms wrapped around your torso loosely. Sakusa shrugged at him briefly after you let go. “Are you gonna say hi to me or hug me, Huh??” He looked at you expectantly and with a pout on his face.

That’s exactly what you feared. You thought you wouldn’t have to endure seeing him happy with someone else. But never mind. You nodded and turned slowly before looking at Atsumu with a big grin. “Sounds great and Hi, bestie.” You gave him a brief side hug; however, his hug consumed your whole body. The action made you tense before slowly hugging him back. Your expression became more neutral gradually as you melted into the hug. you inhaled softly and lost yourself in the embrace that you longed for. To Atsumu, your avoidance was a flunk but you were specifically avoiding the inevitable. This. You were screaming at yourself to let go and remember that you were done with him. Everything felt okay again. You were enjoying his light when you had no right to. You mustered up some willpower and forced yourself to pull away before he could. “What game are we playing?”

The night continued with everyone having fun. Your facade was worked. And for a while..? It was how things were before. You felt relieved and desperately missed the interactions you used you have with all of them regularly. Your guard dropped and for once in a long time. You felt that Atsumu still truly cared about you, again. Even just as a friend. Rekindling with everyone made the evening feel fun and everyone got along.

Atsumu felt content about all of his closest friends being together once again. A large sense of love and pride ran through him. Everything was complete in his eyes. Being a star, he was used to being observed by everyone. But he had a group of people to who he always wanted attention. His closest friends, his brother, his best friend, and his partner. He shined brightly for those he cared about. In a way, Osamu, Y/n, and his partner were his stars. He loved how each had their own light and reacted differently to him. Soon he’d have all three of his stars together.

The front door unlocked. Atsumu and you both looked toward the door to see who it was. It was Osamu and —-. At the same time, you two reacted. Atsumu smiled and beamed as he started getting excited for his partner and Osaumu to join. You, on the other hand, your smile faded into a small one. A visible shift in your mood occurred and it caught the attention of three guests. But not the person who mattered to you most.

Osamu, Akaashi, and Sakusa noticed the change before glancing at Atsumu and then at each other. Unbeknownst to you, you had exposed yourself. The three had some slight suspicions about your behavior.

Atsumu quickly welcomed his partner. He cupped their face while sharing a loving kiss with them. The scene made you nauseous. You turned your head away to protect yourself. All the hard work you had done would have been for nothing. You couldn’t break and feel more heartache over someone who had no idea about your feelings. You didn't hate his significant other. You hated how they snuck in and pushed you down from Atsumu's priorities. Atsumu told you how they cared about you but it seemed the opposite. You didn’t trust yourself to not tear up at the sight of them. You swallowed your pride and said hello anyway.

No matter what happened, or how much time had passed. Atsumu wasn’t yours. He could never love you in the way you wanted him to. He wasn’t your star. The stardust that he left behind time and time again, would always cloud your vision and your heart.

Osamu walked by you with a bag of groceries in hand. “I’m gonna make something. Wanna help?” He asked, grinning down at you. He was trying to give you an escape. A break from the couple that caused you pain. His smile turned into a frown when you shook your head at him. In a small voice, you mumbled a “No” before staring at the TV. Osamu sighed slightly and left you be. “Does anyone wanna help me?”

“I do!” “ME!” The two voices were Hinata and Atsumu’s partner. The two of them ran into the kitchen.

Atsumu laughed before taking a seat beside you. He looked at you happily until he noticed your blank stare. He took the opportunity to throw his arm around your shoulder and pulled you closer to him. “Heyyyyy, we’re all having funnnn! Don’t zone out on us! Who else is gonna talk to me about the newest episode we watched of our favorite show.”

You sucked your teeth and forced a smile. “I’m just tired, and I haven’t seen it yet. You told me that we’d watch it together. So I haven't watched it yet. Have you watched it already?” You looked at his face for some honesty. A moment of weakness because you felt desperate to hear that he kept something special between just you two. He had the effort to invite you over. He could have waited to do one of the last shared activities you two had… Right..?

Atsumu looked nervous and started stuttering. “Wellll. Ya knowwww. Uhh. We can still watch it! I... Um. I haven’t seen it with you yet?“ He looked past you for the aid of your mutual friends. He wanted you to still be excited but his confession already slipped out.

Sakusa caught his beg for help and rolled his eyes. He had no intentions of helping. Bokuto chimed after letting Atsumu dig himself into a deeper grave. “Well it’d be the first time you’d see it together so does that count? I mean I think We can all watch it so it's our first time together” Bokuto looked like a sad little puppy while trying to reach for a good reason for you to not be upset.

Suna scoffed, “Y/n, he watched it without you. —— and him wouldn’t shut up about it a few days ago. He said you’d be cool with it.”

You looked back at Suna and then at Bokuto with an upset look on your face. “ I thought you’d wait for me, Miya.” You said as you looked Atsumu in the eyes. Using his last name made him wince. “You couldn’t wait even though you said you would? We don’t hang out like we used to anymore. We don't do anything together anymore. You know that. And you couldn’t wait, so why try and lie?”

Atsumu shrugged his shoulders and laughed uneasily. “Y/n..! Heyyyyyy come ooon. You know it’s still our thing. I just got overexcited. Plus It was late and we watched it. But you should be happy for me! I mean I found out that —- likes, all the same, shows you and me like! And without you, we wouldn’t be having so much fun. You’re the reason why I’m such a good boyfriend cause you taught me to be better. Don’t be upset..! Come on, you know I still love you though!”

You stared at him and then looked at the ground. Your heart was racing and you felt like you received whiplash. He was doing all the things you two did together with them..? You were just a.. a temporary emotional connection for him to practice a relationship with. You used to tear up and feel giddy when he said he loved you. Now it felt empty. It stung more to hear those words. You knew it was a bad idea to come over. You opened your mouth to speak before closing it again. You had to play it off. “No worries, dude. Don’t even worry about it. It’s just a show.” You grinned half-heartedly but your hands were shaking.

Atsumu stared at your face for any signs of dishonesty and then smiled in relief. “Alright. Thanks for understanding.” He patted your back before leaving you on the couch. He widened his eyes and exhaled sharply as he walked away. He needed to remove himself from the tense situation.

Sakusa glanced at you and then at Suna, Bokuto and Akaashi. You looked distressed and anxious. The more they stared at you, the more you felt worse. Akaashi spoke up, “Y/n…? Are you okay?”

It broke you. A small question is all that it took for your eyes to water. You held onto your emotions for so long… It was just a dumb show. It shouldn’t have hurt that he lied and used your friendship to test out things to do in a relationship. It wasn’t fair. You thought he cared..! You looked up at him with a slow nod. Your vision became blurrier by the second. You were crying and no matter how hard you tried to wipe your tears. They didn’t seem to stop. Akaashi came to sit beside you. He furrowed his brows before putting an arm around your back.

Atsumu was a stupid star and you hated him. You hated loving him and you hated yourself for never saying anything. You hated your unrequited feelings. You hate his light. You hated his stupid smile and his stupid hair. You hated when he made you feel like he cared. You hated the times spent with him that made you stay. You loved that stupid star and you would never get to keep that star that you desperately wanted. Pathetic, that's what you were. You are completely hopeless and pathetic while crying in his apartment over him.

Akaashi wasn’t sure what was exactly wrong but he stayed with you while you cried. He motioned the others to leave. Sakusa and Suna quickly left the living room. He hesitated to speak, “Ko, go get me some water for them”. Bokuto nodded and ran. They were determined to help you. “You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to, but if you want me to take you home, I can.” You sniffled as you looked at the man who was struggling to comfort you. You nodded your head and your voice trembled. “I’m okay... Thank you, Keiji. I’m sorry to cry. I just have a lot on my mind,” you mumbled.

He shook his head while he listened. “Don’t apologize for your feelings. We’re all here for you. Finish calming down and we can talk.” He said as he rubbed your back. "You're safe with me, okay?" The comfort you missed desperately from a friend made your heartache. You leaned against him before sighing shakily. He held you like he meant it. You hadn’t felt so cared about in a long time, making you weak. His compassion made you feel better about being alone. Akaashi Keiji was different. He wasn’t your star either but his short timing of comfort and reassurance was more than what Atsumu did for you in almost a year. If Atumu wanted to be better, even as a friend. He would have done it.

"Do you get something to eat before you take me home? I could use the company of a friend right now." With no hesitation, Keiji smiled softly and nodded. Regardless of what was happening, he was happy you let him stay with you.

The number of people in the kitchen was becoming overwhelming when Bokuto burst in, yelling that he needed a cold water bottle. The disturbance caused some of them to argue. Atsumu was clinging to his partner’s waist. He laughed at the entertaining group bickering. Osamu raised a brow, “Where’s Keiji and Y/n?” Sakusa huffed in defeat and he motioned with his head. “In the living room. They needed a minute.”

This got Atsumu’s attention. “Oh? I didn’t know Keiji had a thing for them?” He asked for confirmation. “They better not be making out on my couch.” He said in annoyance. It could work between you and Akaashi… But you would have told your best friend first. You’d tell him before you picked someone to be with. Especially if it was someone in your friend group.

Bokuto shook his head. “Nah Uh, they started crying and he wanted to stay with them.” He took the water bottle into the living room.

Atsumu’s smile dropped. You were crying..? And you didn’t go to him first..? He followed Bokuto out of the kitchen quickly. He hated seeing you sad. It was one thing if he could avoid you behind a screen but not in person. Akaashi was hugging you. You looked so sad… Your eyes were red and puffy from crying. Small hiccups and deep breaths could be heard from you. It hurt to see you so upset and the guilt of not being there for once got to him. It dawned on him how he hadn't comforted you in a long time. Sure, you'd ask for his company or time. But you were capable of handling yourself. He had someone he needed to be there for, already. You would always wait for him anyway. He still cared but. It was unavoidable to brush off your cries now.

He watched as Bokuto and Akaashi soothed you. He stood there for a while. Just watching you. They kept you distracted and talked. They even managed to get a laugh out of you. Maybe it was the lighting, his guilt, or maybe the distance between you two made his heart fonder towards you. But your appearance and your energy captivated him. Your laugh made him feel nostalgic. It had been so long since he heard it. It triggered something inside of him. It was familiar and comforting. He always loved your laugh. It always made him laugh too. Atsumu was blinded by a familiar light then. A bright and cool light.

Y/n shined softly as a star at the beginning of the friendship. Atsumu forgot about your starlight the closer you two got. He stopped noticing your light a long time ago. Until now, he never took the time to notice it. He spent so long outshining you that he had forgotten what drew him to you in the first place. He admired your personality and how easily you adjusted to others. You got along with anyone if you wanted to. You were a kind and inviting star. Sure, anyone could be special. But you were you. You showed him throughout your friendship that you adored him. At this moment, it reminded him how often he’d look at you as a boost for himself. You had such a comforting light. You weren’t a big star like him. But you were a close star to him and he appreciated you. (In his own ways. Albeit unhealthy but still appreciated.) You were always reachable. You were always reliable. You were always there for him. Seeing you shine bright at the moment made him rethink if he overlooked your star for too long. He wanted to change that and be there for his best friend.

He smiled to see your attitude shift into your old happy self. You interacted with them effortlessly. Despite crying, you were more lively than before. Bokuto noticed him watching and he called him over. Atsumu didn’t anticipate for you to look at him and be disappointed?? It was a blow to his ego for you to make such a face. What did he do?! You always smiled at him like he was the best thing in the world. Where was that smile?? He furrowed his brows with a grin. “Everything okay over here? I heard you were crying. Do you wanna talk?”

“No, I’m good.”

“Oh..” He stood there dumbfounded. “Are you sure? You know I’m always here for you.” He watched as you nodded. Your body was still leaning against Akaashi. It didn’t bother him but he could’ve helped you too..! He wanted to be there for you but you said no...

“I think I’m going to head home. I’m just too tired. But we can catch up later, okay?” You said as you stood up from the couch. “Tell everyone I said bye,” you said with a smile.

Atsumu shook his head to refocus himself. “I’ll drive you then.” He said while he scrambled to get his shoes by the front door.

“Actually, Keiji is going to drive me home. So you don’t have to, Atsumu.” Your words made him drop his shoes on the floor. You never declined his company before. “Have fun and enjoy your night. Thanks for inviting me.” You said as you put your shoes in front of him. “I’m okay, so you can tell your partner that they don’t have to worry about you giving me any time.” He didn’t understand the change. What happened while he was gone?? Akaashi opened the door for you and he walked with you out.

Atsumu watched you walk away with Akaashi. Keiji looked back but you never did. If he finally was seeing your beautiful and bright light again. So why were you leaving him in the dark?

Sakusa and ---- came up behind him. “Are you gonna close the door?” One of them asked, but he didn’t move. He never felt so dismissed by you. Anyone else, he wouldn’t have cared but it was you. Sakusa remembered this scene. It was you staring longing at Atsumu at the game, almost a year ago. He felt pity for you and him. But it wasn’t his job to point out the problem. If you never said anything, Sakusa wouldn’t either. He leaned close to Atsumu’s ear. “I think you fucked up.” He whispered. He stepped away from him to make room for his partner.

Atsumu’s partner waved goodbye to you and Akaashi. “Babe, we have to close the door. The cool air will get out.” They giggled before kissing his cheek. They closed the door and Atsumu didn’t move from his spot. He stared at the shut door for a moment. “Babe? Atsumu? Hello? Are you okay? Baby talk to me?” His partner called out to him in a concerned tone but their voice was drowned out due to his realization. He missed his star.

Atsumu sat on the couch and was quiet for the rest of the night. He felt abandoned..? Hurt..? He was just being sensitive but... You made him feel unwanted. Everyone left and said goodbyes. Akaashi never came back that night. He stayed with you. At least that's what he heard from Bokuto. "Keiji said y/n is okay. He's probably gonna stay overnight to be sure they're okay." When was the last time you asked him to stay over for the night? His partner was upset by his depressed state. He mentally clocked out. He checked his phone constantly and after getting nothing from you for hours, he messaged you.

“Hey, I hope you’re okay, bestie. Just know that I love you and I’m here for you.” He typed out before typing again. “Call me in the morning, okay? I miss you ⭐️”

He never shot up so quickly when he heard his phone go off.

“Okay, good night, bestie. :)”

Despite getting a response, he felt worse than he did when he was waiting for you to reach out first. He even used the star emoji, which you would always use for him. Sure, the message was positive but it wasn't normal. You never said that you loved him back once.

Your light was starting to drift from his life. That’s the thing about stars. Stars die off but their light is shown afterward. At first glance, it’ll seem like things didn’t change. But you were already a fading star before he even had a chance.

#haikyuu #haikyuu angst #atsumu angst #atsumu x gender neutral reader #atsumu x y/n #atsumu x reader #atsumu x you #miya atsumu #my fics #miya osamu #suna rintarou #bokuto kotaro #sakusa kiyoomi #hinata shoyo #akaashi keiji #mentions of other haikyuu characters #gender neutral reader

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ayosdesignz-blog · 5 months

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I finally finished good omens 2!!

Some spoilers I guess for those later into it than me:

Metatron is a manipulative shit. Calling it now.

He was part of the party that fired Gabriel, was the one to insist he be searched for quietly and then acted as if the angel group might be in trouble when all was said and done.

The natzi zombie thing was...horrific. Those poor ppl they ate...🥺

No spoiler I came across warned of them.

The friendship between Shax and her buddy she made a deal w/ was cool. I like how they honestly remained honest about helping each other so far. 🤣 They even did a fist bump over her prospective promotion to grand Duke of hell meaning she could drag his ranking up too!! And it's cute how she goes to the Traitor Crowly for advice or clarification after having taken his rank and that he actually gives it even when mocking.

I can see why ppls feelings were hurt by the ending but it wasn't THAT bad. Tho I think I'm only able to think that cuz I saw posts about a season 3 incoming so...lol.

I could honestly see where both were coming from regarding the whole "be together in heaven" thing but I think Crowly had the better idea of things. Both sides are toxic. They also give a lot of pressure. And while Aziraphale may want to change things on the inside it doesn't mean he'd be able to, even with the 2 of them. Especially since he's so gung-ho still about heaven being right.

Speaking of, am I the only one who found that odd? He's been questioning and circumventing heaven while collaborating with a demon for...too many damn centuries to just insist that Heaven is the good side like that negates all the things he's witnessed and gone through and had to work around to help ppl.

I mean the true start of his disquiet and discomfort was learning that a favored human of God was being purposely bullied, harassed, tormented, bereaved, and forsaken for a bet. A lousy bet with no true stakes or real worth since God is "all seeing and all knowing" and therefore shouldn't feel need to do so because of a demon's needling.

He seems like he's not really liked by other angels much and he knows the other higher ups don't really respect him. If he felt it hard to bend rules and such before why exactly does he think he will have an easier time avoiding direct orders from the very tops? Disregarding his excitement. Who will actually, properly listen to him? When he himself can be easily led if not feeling stubborn.

The whole last conversation between the demon and angel was just...I mean it struck me that Aziraphale tends to not listen. Not properly anyway. When Crowly wants to say something important-urgent even, he's disregarded or made to wait because Aziraphale just has to say or do his thing 1st. And even if or when he listens...he doesn't do so fully. Not for the important conversations we got to witness. He'll insist on things having to go his way or no way at all unless he's kinda forced to reconsider or compromise. And sometimes that takes him awhile.

Like why was it such a big deal for him to admit he likes Crowly even now? After everything. He chose "its us against them" as his side but still looks perturbed when someone says they're friends. Still insists he's on the good side, heaven's side. He can say he needs Crowly and wants them to work together in heaven. But not try to discuss anything further because their viewpoints differ again.

Personally I don't see why they don't plan out how to make it all work in their favor, get heaven to make a few more concessions or whatever and if after both are now angels and still don't like the mindless/senseless harm heaven tries to make them do they can then run off far away together like Crowly has wanted since...before season 1 I think? It would make it only 1 faction likely to chase them instead of both as previously feared.

Also I'm disappointed that Aziraphale didn't defend Crowly when Metatron insulted him for having "too many fool questions". And was actually a warning flag for me. Yknow aside from the look he gave Crowly when 1st leaving.

Anyway!

I'm a little disappointed with the style Crowly chose to blend in to heaven. I mean he was cute or whatever but I missed the curl/wave to his hairrrrrrr 😫

I like that Crowly confronted Gabriel about how mean he was to Aziraphale before trying to kill him. He didn’t remember as it happened but I'm sure he remembers once he got his thoughts back. Still could've gave a proper thank you to both tho.

I also like that Aziraphale didn't push Crowly away from him for the kiss. Couldn’t tell if he kissed back. But he did rub his hands on Crowly's back so that's something I guess lmao.

Oh! But the end credits! That was interesting. Crowly maintained his upset but stoic disposition while Aziraphale kept trying to force his pleasant smile on his face over and over.

It occurs to me the whole promotion thing could be a trap.

#rant #rambling #my thoughts #good omens 2 #crowly x aziraphale #crowly good omens #aziraphale #Aziraphale is kinda dumb #glad i finally watched this #the money spent wasn’t worth it tho #they were both near tears in their talk #they need to talk more about it honestly #ineffable husbands #ineffable idiots #that's all i can think to share rn - I'm sleepy #falling asleep while typing this all out lmao

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ticklish-n-stuff · 6 months

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Profile Tag Game

Hello: I'm Sakura! No offense, but umm... why do you want to talk to me? Haha! That was awkward... but jokes aside, let's strive to have a pleasant chat!~

Chat: Tickling - Do I like tickling? Well... yeah. It's been one of my "special" interests for as long as I can remember. W-why are you looking at me like that...?

Chat: Psychology - I don't get passionate about many things, but this, this is something I'm sure of.

Chat: Music - When my emotions can't get put into words, listening to music helps gather my thoughts.

When it Rains: I never understood how nature sounds can be relaxing. I just automatically tune out the noise.

After the Rain: Ugh, it's gonna get real cold tonight. Make sure to bundle up well, don't want our joints hurting now, haha!

When Thunder Strikes: *gasp* S-sorry, I get easily startled...

When it Snows: Snow...? I've never seen it myself. Although, I doubt my body could handle it.

When the Sun is Out: Hngh... my eyes are weak to such intense light...

When the Wind is Blowing: Even when I cut my hair shorter, it still brushes against my ears and neck! It tickles so bad... Don't laugh at me, haha!

Good Morning: Morning already...? Ugh... How do I get out of bed?

Good Afternoon: Can I nap already, pleaseeeee? I promise I'll do my work later.

Good Evening: It's evening, y'know what that means... Time to suddenly feel somewhat energetic and cram everything I didn't do during my day!

Good Night: Every night without fail, I'll daydream about my interests until I fall asleep.

About Sakura: Physical affection - I'm not the most touchy person out there, but that doesn't mean I'm against receiving it!

About Sakura: Relationships - I recently learned that I value my friendships more over romantic relationships, although I'm still a sucker for crappy romcoms.

About Sakura: Perception - It always baffles me when people describe me diferently as to how I view myself. It probably comes off as attention seeking, but I genuinly don't get it.

Something to Share: Language - My main language is actually spanish! Although I prefer to speak english, much easier hehe.

Interesting things: Growing up - Growing up is much less scarier than what other people make it out to be. Could've saved me the extra anxiety, haha!

Sakura's Hobbies: I don't open up about my hobbies much because of past judgement. But essentially, I like to play videogames and write. Sometimes I'll read or watch shows if I'm not too tired.

Sakura's Troubles: What troubles me...? Haha! Hahahaha! Where do I even begin?

Favorite Food: I could eat pasta every day of my life and die happy.

Least Favorite Food: I'm not really sure. I tend to dislike most foods based on texture more than taste.

About @xsezzie : Sezzie is such a sweet and caring person, I'm so glad I get to call her my friend. I wouldn't trade all those talks about MEN for anything, hehe~

About @nervousswitch : At first, I wasn't too fond of being viewed as a big sister, but Ariy has made me enjoy it, not gonna lie.

About @kairoscler : It's kinda crazy to think that Kairo showed up randomly one day in my ask box talking about lee Rui, and now we have such a strong bond.

About @lovinglyroses : Lucy is my platonic soulmate!~ But in all seriousness, I'm so glad to be friends with such a ray of sunshine.

About @practickles : Those thoughtful conversations I've had with Catet will forever reign in my heart.

About @jackytickles : With Jack, there's never a dull moment. He's one of the few people I'd go out of my way to hug.

About @azureyemberzz : Being friends with Amber is a rollercoaster of emotions. I don't like rollercoasters, but reaching the end makes it all worth it.

Ty Sezzie for tagging me, this was fun to do (^○^)💖

Tagging: @kittyfluffies @jackytickles @duckymcdoorknob @kaerichan-yatta @kairoscler @lovinglyroses @practickles @azureyemberzz and anyone who wants to do it!

#tag game #genshin profile #profile tag game #random shitpost

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bullshit-bulltrue · 9 months

Text

☆ hawk talk 8/16/23 ☆

i was waiting at the front of the school with the rest of the entire school for them to open the doors

and what happened?

all the girls were screaming because of a fucking cicada.

my ears have hurt less from listening to death rock at max volume.

I. WAS. NOT. PREPARED. FOR 40 GIRLS SCREAMING THEIR LUNGS OUT.

oh and uh it was funny bc at one point delgado started jumping up and down to catch the cicada lol

oh and speaking of him, when the staff let us in the school building we had to still wait in the quad(i think that's what we call it) for an other 20 minutes and it turns out i was sorta close to him and his friends while waiting and we made eye contact and he waved at me <3

and his friends kinda just like,, looked at me and i'm like uh hi?

LIKE TF

yeah uh

delgado is really cool but i don't think his friends are too fond of me *awkwardly zones out and questions life bc i haven't been mean and i don't want real chill people to hate me bc that has happened way too many times*

SO ANYWAY-

oh yeah i forgot something

HOW THE HELL DO I ALWAYS END UP WALKING BEHIND DELGADO?? LIKE BITCH RESPECTFULLY MOVE OUT THE WAY I CANNOT SEE OVER YOU YOU'RE LIKE AT LEAST 3 INCHES TALLER THAN ME AND I AM ALREADY BLIND AS IT IS

but like it's better than all the taller people being behind me and me almost getting trampled

so.. yeah ig...

nothing much happened in history

it was boring

but my desk buddy was acting pretty cool

i still don't like her but i don't necessarily hate her rn

um math was the same ??

oh we learned a way easier way to solve a particular kind of equation!!!!

IM REALLY EXCITED ABOUT THAT!

OH AND THEN WE HAD ENGLISH!!

AND OMG SO THE TEACHER HAD BEEN PRONOUNCING BASEBALL GUY'S NAME WRONG FOR A WEEK AND A HALF OMFG

AND LIKE I KNEW SHE WAS PRONOUNCING IT WRONG BC THERE WAS NO WAY HIS NAME SOUNDED THAT STUPID

Y'ALL I CAN'T-

AND THEN THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED HAPPENED:

Mrs. k: *road call* *says baseball guy's name*

baseball guy: here

mrs. k: i'm not pronouncing that right, am i?

baseball guy: nope.

mrs. k: *waits for him to pronounce it right* ... *guesses and actually gets it right*

baseball guy: *still don't fucking say anything*

(he's jut like this when it comes to the english teacher so the whole not talking thing isn't like strange behavior or anything)

oh and delgado's short bestie had to do testing still so he had to go to another classroom

and like

we have a new student. she sat at our table. so uh,, yeah

it was like kinda awkward cus any time i tried engaging in conversation with her she didn't answer me and i was like okay you're probably not a bitch and ur just shy that's fine but like i wanted to scream

BASEBALL GUY IS QUIET TOO BUT AT LEAST HE SPEAKS WHEN SPOKEN TO GODDAMN

so it was awkward just having someone literally just watch me and my friend speak for a while but then i was like fuck you and completely tuned her out

AND WAS NO ONE GONNA TELL ME HOW PAINSTAKINGLY AWKWARD IT IS FOR YOU AND SOMEONE ELSE TO GRAB THE SAME SHEET OF PAPER MULTIPLE TIMES BC LIKE ALL THE PAPERS WERE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DESK AND ME AND BASEBALL GUY KEPT REACHING FOR THE SAME PAPER LIKE FIVE FUCKING TIMES AND AT ONE POINT I WAS LIKE NAW BESTIE I'M JUST PUTTING MY HAND DOWN AND I JUST WAITED FOE HIM TO GIVE ME THE PAPERS BC HOLY SHIT I WANTED TO SHRIVEL UP AND DIE (let it die, let it die, let it shrivel up and die! was written about me actually)

oh and like we used this one program to measure our lexile and like i was the only student who's never used it before

so i'm like hha idk what to do <3

and mrs. k explained it and basically you read and get quizzed and that's it and like i didn't know where to find my test score so like i wrote down the wrong answer on my log 😭😭

AND THE NUMBER FOR LIKE A CERTAIN PART OF THE THINGY WAS 8 PLUS 20 BONUS POINTS

SO I WROTE THAT DOWN

AND THEN DELGADO SAW AND HE'S LIKE [INSERT DEAD NAME) THAT AIN'T RIGHT 💀 SMTH AIN'T ADDIN UP

so then i was like WHERE TF DO I LOOK FOR MY SCORE THEN

and yeah when i gave him my chromebook to show me where tf to look i just had to scroll down 😭😭

and then he was like "oh you got a hundred, good job!" and then i mentally started doing a happy dance <3

and then we like did our english journal thing to where we had to glue shit and put tabs in our notebook and stuff and it was actually fun !!

and then we had to number a bunch of pages and i treated it like a race in my head bc i'm like that and even tho nobody technically knew i was racing, i WON, bitches

so then i decided to bother delgado at lunch again 🙃

well idk if i bothered him per se, or his friends 💀

so like my mom has been packing me dragon fruit everyday for lunch and i got burned out this week so i gave it to delgado's friend Alex

and he's like "why you keep giving me this 😃" and he's like naw i still want it but like why

and i'm like "because i'm fucking nice 🙂"

nah i just said that i was burned out and shit

so yeah

and brO-

DELGADO HAS THE BEST CURSED IMAGE COLLECTION I HAVE EVER SEEN LIKE I SERIOUSLY NEED TO UP MY GAME Y'ALL

I SWEAR I ALMOST CHOKED ON MY POZOLE THREE TIMES

oh and like i also gave delgado the tortillas my mom packed me bc i wasn't that hungry and i did not think that him eating the school good was a good idea bc it's on a prison level of shitty ngl

so then this bitch takes the tortillas, and him and alex start slapping each other in the face with them 😭😭

ALEX THROWS THE TORTILLA ACROSS THE FUCKING MESS HALL DUDES

AND THEN DELGADO TAKES THE 3RD TORTILLA AND CRUMPLES IT UP AND WRAPS IT INTO A BALL IN THE TINFOIL AND THROWS IT AT SOMEONE'S HEAD

THIS BITCH IS A MENACE

oh and yo i found out that Alex is of puerto rican descent and i'm like so glad that the group i hang out with is all latino

except lanie, she's the token gringa, but that's alright, it's not her fault <3

so then from the mess hall, me and delgado are headed the same way bc our lockers are sorta close to one another

and THIS BITCH

so i put my stuff back in my locker, right?

well now i'm having to exit the hallway for our grade and it's loud as fuck and then all a sudden i hear delgado yelling my name and he's running up to me and is like "HEY! WE NEED OUR CHROMEBOOKS!"

wait let's format it like this:

okay from the top:

d: *running up to me and yelling bc it's loud asf* HEY! [INSERT LEGAL NAME] WE NEED OUR CHROMEBOOKS!!!"

m: WHAT?? (m stands for Me) AGAIN???

d: YEAH

*runs to my locker to grab it*

random ass teacher: hey! go around!

(we have a system where you enter the hallway one way, and if you need to go back, you have to exit and start all over. it sucks ass. i hate it)

m: *running to catch up with d after getting my chromebook bc we have PE in the same period*

my gym coach: oh no, only the boys need it bc they didn't do the form yet

m: *ready to lay on the gym floor and cry* oh, okay! *acts happy bc i ain't bout to be a weak bitch infront of her*

m: *runs like my life depends on it to my locker to put my chromebook back and runs back to the gym* (THE GYM AND MY GRADE HALLWAY ARE NOT CLOSE TO EACH OTHER, AT ALL Y'ALL)

(LITERALLY RUNNING TO THE OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE SCHOOL)

I WAS ALMOST LATE BUT I BARELY MADE IT BEFORE THE TARDY BELL RANG AND I SWEAR I DID A FUCKING MILE SINCE I RAN BACK AND FORTH LIKE 4 TIMES SO ME THINKS THAT COUNTS FOR ENOUGH PE

and then we had to do like fitness testing and we did:

push-ups, sit ups, crunches, shuttle runs, a lap around the volleyball court, and then basketball

AND WE DO THE MILE ON FRIDAY, IF IT DOESN'T RAIN!!!!!

I'M SO EXCITED FOR THAT !!!!

^^ this is genuine, y'all. i love running so much!! yk, except for when it's back and forth across the entire school trying not to be late

AND LIKE I WAS SO FUCKING PISSED AT DELGADO BC DEEP DOWN I KNEW I DIDN'T NEED MY CHROMEBOOK BC WE DID THAT SHIT YESTERDAY

but then i was like why am i mad at him? it's not like he knew or anything so i didn't yell at him or anything lol

and then at the end of school when i passed him in the hallway, we said our goodbyes and yeah since i have first lunch tomorrow –technically today but whatever– we don't have the same lunch schedule, but i'll probably eat lunch with him on Friday, so that's cool!

oh and also, since i hate broadcast with a burning passion, my mom is going to go raging bitch mode in my school until i get an elective in my grade hallway that i want <3

and i want an elective in my grade hallway so i have 3rd lunch so that i don't ever have to eat lunch alone bc i look like a sad girl with no friends when i have 1st lunch and my anxiety peaks so yeah

I HOPE YOU LIKED TODAY <3

well technically yesterday but whatever fuck off

it's now 3:30am and i need to sleep

i woke up at 1am for no reason so??

yeah lol

night <3

#☆ hawk talk #i did NOT mean for this is published so late but i fell asleep and i woke up at like 1am so i was like LET'S WRITE IM MY DIARY

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prophecyguided · 1 year

Text

@dreamsofalife || from x

The hug was incredibly comforting, and for the first time since all of this started, she felt safe and content. She was definitely gonna have to do something nice for Barclay for talking her through all of this.

As much as it hurt to hear that he’d been through worse somehow, the message wasn’t lost for it. For once, Shy just listened, absorbing what was told to her, hoping against hope that it wasn’t too late to fix...or, well, not try to fix, her mistakes past. It didn’t hurt that Barclay was so kind in his explanation; he understood and wasn’t saying it to be critical or call her out. He understood the score and wanted things to work out, and if anything that made it an easier pill to swallow.

“You’re right...I’m sorry, I know I’ve been kinda...control-freaky lately, and that’s not the way this needs to be handled. I get so worked up about stuff and trying to make it better that sometimes I think I forget that there’s stuff that you can’t really do that for.” She bit her lip, still troubled by everything, but very clearly taking what he said to heart. “I just gotta take a step back and not get so overprotective and smothery and stuff, and be more of a support and less of a...I don’t think tank is the right term, but I’m not sure what the right one would even be.”

She almost jumped right back to hugging him, but hung back, not willing to dive right back in to acting on pure emotion once more. “Thanks for talking me through this...and for listening. You probably get this a lot, but you’d be a great counselor.”

Good thing for Shy, Barclay was a hugger. He pulled her back into the hug when he saw the hesitation, his hand giving her back a little pat.

"You got it. When he comes back, don't rush him or try to smother him, just give him a little space and ask what he needs. Just don't be too disheartened if he just asks for some space. That may be what he needs most so try not to take it personally."

Barclay gave one last squeeze before he let go, laughing a little. "Well, I'm just speaking from experience. You make mistakes but you learn from them and then you use that new knowledge going forward. Now, let's go see about that power washer and gettin' this graffiti off, okay?"

It was easy enough to find it in storage and it seemed to have all the pieces as far as he could tell. It was loud as all hell when he turned it on but it was enough to get the spray paint off without damaging the RV. After a but he offers it to Shy, hoping actively doing something to help would improve her mood. Or at least keep her mind preoccupied until the others got back.

#i do that || ic #the mothman || self #the dreamer || shy #the bigfoot || barclay #please can you call me indrid? it's... i don't prefer moth man. || amnesty verse

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aquanova99 · 2 years

Note

Hi love

Egyptian coven x deaf reader?Headcanons

Thanks

Amun

Bestie he already knows sign language don’t you worry

Doesn’t matter what country you’re from he’s learned it. Every vampire has their things they like to learn but Amun has been around the longest

He enjoys learning and is fluent in several languages, when he realizes you’re deaf he refreshes on the region your from and makes sure there hasn’t been any additions he’s missed

He hopes once you’re turned your hearing might return but he’s not really worried about regardless he can communicate regardless

Makes sure the rest of the coven has studied at least the basics so you don’t feel left out of conversations

Kinda regrets it because he finds that he likes when only you two can understand eachother

But your comfort takes priority everyone is learning today

Kebi

Hate herself for not wanting to learn something like sign language

Now that she’s met you and sees how much you work to communicate how the rest of the world does her heart hurts a little

She had never thought about things like this before, she’d never had to think about it

Now it’s all she thought about, how you conformed or were expected to conform while most made no effort to communicate with you

She had seen you talk to Amun and only realized how happy it made you being able to talk to someone else

But she wanted that to be her so one night she forced Amun to teach her and show her where he learned it from so she could learn

When she learns it, she enjoys being one of the few people who you can talk to. Does not want to teach the others. She likes it just being the two of you and hates that Amun knows everything right now

Benjamin

So he learned sign language and he will use it to communicate with you if it’s easier

He also has tablets and over things to communicate with others if it’s easier

He also gets very defensive if people ignore you because it’s easier to not speak to you or if they make no effort to communicate in a way that makes you comfortable

Basically if they expect you to just read lips he will make sure they know you can either take your time and sign and he can translate if they don’t know it or they can wait for you to type it out

He uses his gift to get your attention if you are distracted

He loves that you can still sense danger without sound as your other senses are heightened even more so as a vampire but he still gets very nervous

Tia

I feel like I always make her similar to Amun but what can I say she’s her father daughter

It’s probably not as extensive but she definitely knows some more popular sign languages like ASL and BSL and probably the variety that she knows in her country

If you are not from any of these areas she will pick up the language quite easily

She finds herself enjoying not having to use words around you, but the two of you have definitely argued in sign and one of you said ‘stop yelling at me’ and both of you lost it

She loves to hear your laughs and if anyone has more of a secret language it’s Tia

Her gestures are tiny and quick so really she’s figured how to talk when other people are turned around and likes to get you all riled up because then the coven will ask you and half the time it’s not things for them to hear

The coven feels really bad for you because you make Tia so happy and when she’s really happy subconsciously she allows herself to sing out loud and they wish you could hear because she will mostly do it when she’s playing with your hair or something

You have caught her singing before but before you could ask Amun asked her to talk to kebi for some reason and explained that she’s shy about it and if you ask she’d probably stop

Would love to point out that even if someone is deaf that it doesn’t mean they can’t talk. Everyone has the same reaction whether you’re with them or not, they just listen to you like they would anyone else. No one would be allowed to make fun of it question how you speak either.

#aquas asks #twilight egyptian coven #egyptian coven #twilight amun #twilight kebi #twilight benjamin #twilight tia #egyptian coven imagine

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aminiatureworld · 3 years

Text

Small Bits of Memory

Characters: Scaramouche, gn!reader

Word Count: 1,531

Warnings: None

Premise: Little moments between Scaramouche and the reader.

Author’s Note: Warning, I’m not caught up on the archon quest. I did skim the wiki (which made me kinda sad ngl), but if there are inaccuracies, that’s why. I also may have made Scaramouche a bit sappy because of this.

I took “comfort” to mean “hurt/comfort” so if some of these are a bit melancholic it’s because angst brain does not turn off.

Scaramouche

Scaramouche is well familiar with nightmares. He knows the feeling of opening yours eyes in the dark, not moving, not crying out or sitting up; simply opening your eyes as the latent fear of your dreams finally catch up with you and finally your breathing starts to speed in your chest, as your finally realize how afraid you were. Thus on the first night he wakes to you staring intently at the darkness around you, still to the point of stiffness, he automatically understands what’s going on.

At first he’s too scared to wrap his arms around you, afraid that you’ll find the action frightening, or that you’ll instinctively reject him. He only reaches out his hand, secretly relieved when you entwined your fingers within his. Feeling vaguely sentimental in his tired state he whispers: “I’ll protect you from the dark, so stop staring and go back to sleep.” He hopes that you won’t tease him about it tomorrow, as some small part of him knows that it was a very silly thing to say.

Afterwards he grows a little bolder, inching closer to you, then letting one arm rest on your shoulder, fingers featherlight on your skin. Thankfully your penchant for nightmares isn’t too great, so it’s about two months before he wakes up the next day to his arms wrapped around you, you nestled within his sleepy embrace. Seeing you sleeping peacefully after the look of uncomprehending panic plastered across your features the night before calms him like few other things, and he sighs peacefully, letting his eyes flit closed once more. The two of you sleep in that day.

Scaramouche always panics slightly whenever you get hurt. It could be a paper cut, it could be a bruise, it could be a battle injury, his response is relatively similar each time. You might squirm as he cleans your cut off for the third time in ten minutes, assuring him that you aren’t going to die, but he isn’t truly listening to you. There’s a glazed look in his eyes, and it takes him a few moments to register that you’re calling his name. You worry about it sometimes, you wonder what might happen if you were to truly injure yourself. You hope he wouldn’t blame himself too much. Scaramouche has a surprising penchant towards self-flagellation, when he’s not telling himself that he’s superior to everyone around him.

Scaramouche has never horsed around in a river, never experienced a snowball fight, never watched a sunrise for the sake of it. He was not created for such things after all. It’s hard for him to imagine enjoyment in the little pieces of universal humanity, perhaps because he feels somehow separated from such a privilege. You start keeping a list of these sorts of things, small moments to enjoy. He finds the idea silly at first, but gradually grows to like the experience. Perhaps not the individual activities, but the experience as a whole. He might not understand the “universal human experience” as you call it, but the snow against his skin is cold and clear, and the sun looks like fire in the sky, and you’re smiling next to him, and all is well in the world.

Scaramouche doesn’t have much attachment to Inazuma, considering it a desolate land where the people survive despite, not because of, the land. He has no love for the plains, or the skinny forests, or the craggy rocks and hills. The flowers glow preternaturally, and the electricity that fills the air makes unpleasant crackling noises. Nevertheless he has to admit a fondness for the cherry blossoms that bloom on Narukami Islands. It’s as if a small sliver of beauty managed to scrape its way into the world. He’ll take you to see them sometimes, regardless of his status as a Harbinger and a general menace. Perched amidst the falling petals you remind him of some sort of spirit from folklore. If he could draw well at all he thinks he would make a portrait of you surrounded by those blossoms. Certainly there’d be nothing else worth painting.

The two of you like to read together, Scaramouche going over whatever plans he’s currently focusing on, you curled up with a book. If you find a passage or a quote you particularly like you’ll tap him on the shoulder, and Scaramouche will duly listen to you read it aloud. He likes the sound of your reading voice, the way it varies slightly from when you talk. Unfortunately he made the mistake of telling you that once, and you began to insist that he read for you. Though he secretly enjoys doing so, he still grumbles about it out of habit. The both of you know he’s only doing it for show.

Scaramouche once caught you using a broom like a sword. Though you looked very drunk he secretly found it endlessly endearing. He offered to teach you some basic sword forms (despite his weapon knowing swordplay is a basic requirement for all Fatui soldiers). You accepted eagerly at the time, unaware of how much you’d underestimated Scarmouche’s fervor when it came to training. It took a wooden sword snapped in half for him to lay off a little bit, but at least his troops started dropping hints at you that they no longer feared for their lives. Though you think they were joking, you were still glad for the learning experience. You two still spar every once in a while though.

Living up to his title of “Balladeer” Scaramouche has quite the haunting voice. Not particularly high, his range still has a natural warmth to it that belies his cold exterior. You almost never catch him actually singing. The first time it happened was when you had a migraine. Refusing to leave your tent – you hadn’t actually convinced him you weren’t dying – he seemed torn between boredom and worry. At first it was a mere hum, but soon enough it morphed into a captivating song. He refused to tell you the name of it, claiming he’d forgotten, and refused to bring it up the next morning. Still sometimes you’ll catch him now and then humming out a tune, usually when he’s reading or if you’re sick or upset. His singing is something you associate with comfort.

Scaramouche is a terrible letter writer. If you send him ten letters while he’s away he’ll send you three. Still what he lacks in quantity he makes up for in word count. Curt in his official reports, his letters to you are pure stream-of-consciousness, captivating whatever he’s thinking about at the time. Usually the letters are somewhat sappy (or surprisingly bold) missives on how much he loves you and misses you, somehow more honest than when he speaks to you face-to-face. Still you’ve also gotten quite used to a thousand words on how much he hates his fellow Harbingers. You don’t mind, keeping all his letters to you in a box. Though he claims to burn yours, he does the same.

Scaramouche always tell you the days he’s leaving and the days he’s returning. Sometimes he’ll have it down to an estimated hour. Though he appreciates the pomp and spectacle of appearing around others unannounced – something he does quite a bit when working – he refuses to keep you in a limbo of waiting. Secretly he’s also always afraid you might not show up on the docks one day, and every time he sees your face after a long time away a weight lifts in his chest, the pressure on his soul just a little easier to bear every time.

Scaramouche has always felt most comfortable at night. When the world sleeps, when he has the advantage of being awake, being alert, being more powerful. When there are fewer eyes on him, and he can even tell himself that he is the only one awake in the world, can indulge in those moments of wondering, wondering whether he has ever felt something, whether he is missing a crucial piece. Whether he has ever been happy, whether he wants to be so. He can be vulnerable at night, and thus is the reason it appealed to him so much.

Now the night is his favorite time of day because he can always be near you at that time. If you two are in the same land, then you will spend the night in the same room, the same tent, the same bed. Listening to the sound of your breathing, letting himself revel in your closeness, your arms wrapped around his waist, or his wrapped around you, Scaramouche feels truly content. Perhaps he is even happy, perhaps this is what happiness is, what love is. Perhaps it is something more than that, something undefinable, something too abstract to put into words. He loves you, he realizes to himself, he loves you so much. It is overwhelming, like a tidal wave, yet it does not frighten him. He could be struck by lightning and it would not frighten him. It will in the daytime, but now is the night, and now he can marvel peacefully at the fact that he truly loves you.

#made myself emotional with this #genshin impact #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche #genshin scaramouche #genshin impact fanfiction #headcanons #requested #my writing

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xtinyaurora · 3 years

Note

Hi! Can I request a Yandere!Ateez reaction to you running away? I know it’s the standard but I thought it would be easier for the beginning :)

Yandere!Ateez reaction: Their Y/N tries to run away

_____________________________________

➼ requested: yes

➼ genre: yandere, smut

➼ gender neutral + Ateez / gnxateez

➼ Word-count: 1386 words

➼ Warnings: nsfw content, strong language, cursing, spanking, slapping, punching, pet names, degradation, yandere themes, psychopathic, blood, violence, yelling, cuffing,...

➼ Note: This is not based on their real behavior or meant to represent real life. This is simply a fan fiction. In no way am I condoning, justifying, encouraging or promoting yandere behavior or lifestyle. Read at your own risk!!!

____________________________________________

Park Seonghwa

He slowly traced the knife over your naked body, you laying on the bed, cuffed and blindfolded. The only thing heard were your tiny whimpers, until his chuckle broke the silence. „What’s wrong, baby, did I ruin your plans?” Well, he did. Yes, you might be dumb for trying to run away, but it seemed so easy. Seonghwa was gone, going grocery shopping and since you weren’t locked in your room this night, you took that opportunity and broke the tiny bathroom window (since the other doors & windows were locked). So as you were trying to squeeze yourself through that window, Seonghwa returned. Scared and confused about his early return, he told you about the cameras. After harshly pulling you out of that widow, he got you into your current state. You cried, begged and tried to apologize but he didn’t wanted to listen to you. „Pathetic” said the male in front of you with an angry yet unimpressed face. The sound of his belt was heard. „Let’s teach you a proper lessen, yea?”

Kim Hongjoong

He told you to follow his rules, or there will be bad consequences. You didn’t listen. Oh how dumb you are to beak one of his most important rules. „Please, I will do everything you want but please stop!” you cried out loudly. Hongjoong only looked at you with his demonic eyes, smirking at you. „Oh, you want me to stop?” he mocked you with a voice, similar to your own. „Want me to stop pulling out your nails, to stop with the constant whipping and punching and to stop biting your skin so it doesn’t bleed? No, slut, I am not gonna stop, because I’ve told you many times not to break the rules. I’ve told you to never try and run away from me, but, you didn’t listen. So take responsibility for your actions and live with the consequences, dumb pet.”

Jeong Yunho

„You’ve hurt me.” said the guy in front of you, disappointed and angry. „Yunho, I am so sorry, but I can’t do this anymore, please try to understand me.” you cried, kneeling in front of him, hands behind your back. „No, I don’t understand, and I won’t ever understand and do you know why? Because I give you everything you want, everything you can dream of, take care of you and love you to death, and this is the way you repay me? Are you serious, Y/N?” He started to form tears in his eyes while talking. Honestly, you felt kinda bad and ashamed because he was right. He actually really treats you like a royalty, expect for not letting you out of course. He never forgot to buy your favorite flowers before coming home and he never failed to realize when you felt down, taking care of you and not leaving your side for a second. „I am sorry, but I need to show you that you can’t always have it your way, baby. You’ve tested my patience... Come on turn around and get on all fours.”

Kang Yeosang

Stupid. That’s what Yeosang thought of you right now. How could you be so stupid, asking his friends for help? Since you knew his phone password, you texted his friends and tried to explain what kind of a psycho your boyfriend was and that you needed help to escape. Of course, no one believed you. After deleting everything, you putted his phone back, sitting on the couch quietly. „Here.” your boyfriend gave you a bowl of popcorn, starting the movie you were planning to watch. After 10 minutes, Yeosang took his phone from under the pillow, checking what you were up to since he saw how you typed on it before. One of his best friends, Wooyoung, texted him, asking about what his lover told them earlier. Yeosang got red out of anger. „Hey, baby?” he asked. You slowly turned you head in his direction, panicking. „Yes?”. „Did you play with my phone?”. Silence. Now he looked at you and before anything else, you felt his fist in your face. Not once or twice but around 12 times in a row, face starting to bleed. „Stupid thing, what do you think you are doing?! I will make you regret this.”

Choi San

„Yea, you like that, slut?” growled the male behind you. He’s in the middle of ripping your ass apart, punishing you for trying to run away. You idiot thought you could cuff him to the bed while he was sleeping and take his keys to get out of there. Oh how dumb you are. „You little piece of shit, I am going to hurt you so bad. How dare you to pull something like this, huh?!” did the psycho scream at you. He turned you around, grabbing your neck, putting pressure on it and spitting on your face. Then he started slapping you in the face. „Learn your place, pet. Don’t you dare to do something as stupid as this again because next time, I am not only going to break those pretty legs but your arms too, is this understood?”. You only nodded, too terrified to speak. „Good. Now let me get a knife, so I can crave my name into your beautiful soft skin, hm?”

Song Mingi

You were tied to a chair, sitting in the cold and scary basement. Slowly, you heard the door opening. Mingi entered the room looking at you coldly. He had a small bag in his left hand, slowly placing it on the table a few feet from you. He then opened the bag, pulling out a hammer, a knife and an axe. He stared at them for a minute, until he took the axe into his hand and came towards your frightened figure. You began to panic, violently shaking your head. „Oh my god, please don’t.” you begged. As he didn’t stop, you closed your eyes. He kneeled down in front of you, placing the axe above your left knee. „I’ve told you to never run. I’ve told you that if you do something as stupid as this, I will hurt you. Not because I want to, but because I have to.” After finishing his sentence, he raised his hand, ready to chop you leg off.

Jung Wooyoung

You’ve seen this boy get mad, but this time he was completely different. This boy was an ass, now adding more annoyance and brutality to it. He made fun of your crying figure, calling you a crybaby and telling you to shut up. „Cut it. I said that I don’t want to hear your fucking voice. Annoying brat.” did he say while giving you another harsh spank with his belt. Your whole body felt numb at this point. Even if you wanted to move, you just couldn’t. „Ohhh, already giving in?” He laughed. „Come on you can do better than that. Straighten that back!” he started yelling at you. Since you failed to move nor talk, you remind quiet, angering him even more. He pulled you up by your hair so you could look him deep into his eyes. He then started to smirk „Oh, we will have so much fun tonight!”

Choi Jongho

Smack! A few more following close behind. Your ass probably had the shades of red, no, purple by now. I mean, Jongho is a strong man, of course his hits are a lot harder. He had you bend over his leg for over 30 minutes now, not a single glimpse of pity. You felt how the blood floated over your tights all the way to the ground. „What? Does it hurt?” you couldn’t make out any emotions in his voice. Was he still mad or was he trying to show some sympathy? You nodded your head, hoping that he would stop. But the only thing coming out of his mouth was a simple „Good.” When he stood up, you thought it was over but dang it, how dumb you were to think that. He placed you on the bed, then took his clothes off. He grabbed his phone and told you to strip. He stared filming you while so, fucking you roughly afterwards, still filming. „After our little session, I will send and post this everywhere so everyone know who you belong to and who’s names matters to you. Show everyone how good you can be for me, come on.”

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achillieus · 3 years

Text

let you down. (sebastian stan x reader)

summary: it's a universal truth but it's worth repeating; feelings eat us raw. or just an actor and a girl falling in and out of love over the course of three months.

(this was inspired by sebastian's visit to greece for his movie, monday, and is based on that, so that means in the story we’re in 2018. also i have this posted on ao3 too but while i’m writing the last parts i thought of posting it here too)

quick note: i wrote this back in 2018 after meeting sebastian in greece but i redited it now, so if you see any mistakes or typos please tell me :)

pairing: sebastian stan x reader

warnings: alcohol, sexual references, implied depression, sebastian desperately needs to hug the reader, it's kinda slowburn because i love the yearning

part: 2/6

(other parts) (masterlist)

It’s Monday when they come back from their small trip to the south. You’re watering the jasmine in your balcony when you hear the engine of Argyris’ car slowly shut down and see two figures getting out of the back seats.

It’s him and a blonde woman. You remember meeting her that night in the terrace. You’ve learnt that she’s a great actress and will play the other main character in the film.

When she notices you looking at them, she waves.

“Hey, Sebastian it’s your friend there.” She gives his shoulder a soft nudge.

We’re not friends. That’s what you almost yell back at her.

His head shots up, smiling.

He’s always smiling. It’s getting annoying.

You can see him going through his bag as he calls your name.

“Look, I brought you some traditional sweets.” He’s holding a small wrapped up package. He starts wiggling it in the air.

He looks so jolly and proud of himself. It makes your throat dry.

And before you can control it, you laugh. You can’t see it from where you’re standing but he bites his bottom lip at the sound.

Two hours later he’s sitting in your kitchen devouring half of the pastries he got you.

“These are actually so good, how can you not like them?” He says and it comes out all garbled. His mouth is full of sugary dough.

You do like them. But he does too. And you can find them anytime you want here. You doubt it’s the same in New York.

“They’re just not my favorite,” he nods “but thank you anyway.”

“Well let’s say you owe me,” you furrow your brows in confusion “and will repay me by sending me some of those once I’m gone.”

He laughs before taking another bite.

And as you stare at him, you notice that he’s different. His gaze is tranquil, his voice is soft and he has some cream at the corner of his lips.

Like that, he looks more like a guy you met at college than a well known actor.

Like that, we could be friends, you think.

You talk a lot. He tells you about his time in Romania and his first audition. It makes you realize you are far more interested in acting than what you thought. You tell him how you think team Iron Man is the superior team. He gasps, as if he is hurt.

He doesn’t mention his girlfriend. You don’t ask about her. It’s easier for both of you this way.

A stifling heat rises to your body as you walk under the burning sun. You don’t realize how Argyris gets you to give Sebastian a tour around the city, but you can remember a pair of light eyes pleading you.

You can easily hear him humming to himself. You turn to look at him. He’s wearing a hat and his forehead is sweating. He doesn’t seem to mind.

“You’re in a very good mood today.”

“Aren’t you?”

“Well I’m stuck with you for the day so what choice do I have?” You shrug.

He makes a face at you. You crack and a huge smile forms in your face.

He leans closer, mouth to ear and then he speaks.

“You know, I can’t tell if you hate me or just like me too much.”

His breath hits your cheek.

You try not to blink at the sudden foreign touch.

His words find your skin and they’re so clear and powerful. Suddenly you’re an open page to him.

He crosses his arms in front of his chest and waits for an answer, a nod, a glance.

You are still standing close, the city sounds doing nothing to ease the heated silence between you two.

He realizes you’re not going to give him any response so he lowers his eyes.

And then, when he looks up again, it almost feels like he gives you mercy and agrees to let you get away with it this time.

He smiles.

“So where is Acropolis?”

When he’s lying on your couch after six hours of being a tourist and under the summer sun he looks exhausted. Still he’s his typical talkative self.

“You are always so pumped.”

“And you rarely are.”

“Doesn’t it get tiring?” you ask each other at the same time. It seems like you are two different sides of the exact same coin. One body. One heart.

“Today was nice.” He stretches his arms. “Thank you.”

You open the window. There is barely any wind out there. The air smells of hot cement and flowers.

The man on your couch has closed his eyes, breathing softly.

You try to ignore him over and over for the last days. Until you cannot ignore him anymore; your world has come to an end.

So many people know who Sebastian Stan is.

Only few will ever know him like this; falling asleep on a cheap brown couch with his hair messy, his chest rising and falling and his mind empty of thoughts.

These are photographs of your memories now.

An involuntary smile spreads across your face at the thought.

You see him swift and his hand clenches tightly around a throw pillow.

“Stop looking at me like that you creep,” he says.

“Come closer,” he means.

The sun is long gone and he’s still asleep when there’s a knock on your door. It’s Argyris.

“Please tell me he’s here.”

You nod and motion towards Sebastian’s drifted away body.

“When I left you this morning, I didn’t actually think you’d last this long together.” He tells you the moment he sees him.

The words fall out of his mouth too easily for your liking. “But I should have known better.”

You don’t understand much. You take a step out of your door. You don’t want to wake him up.

“Do you know how many times he mentioned you while we were away?’

Everything stops and falls quiet in the hall.

The words choke you. You shake your head.

“I need you to be smarter than him.” He says and touches your shoulder. “His world moves too fast for people like us.”

It’s effortless not to look at the man in front of you. It’s hard not to shallow his saying.

He wakes up an hour later. He looks at you and it feels sacred. His eyes are still red and the pillow has left a mark on his left cheek.

“I’m sorry I fell asleep here.”

“It’s okay.”

“No, it was rude, you should have yelled at me to wake up or something.”

“But you looked tired.”

You carry on with doing the dishes and you hear the couch squeak as he stands up and steps towards you.

The water is refreshingly cold on your skin and the soap smells like lemon.

His hands find your waist and his touch is burning. You wish he disappears. You wish he stays for the night. You don’t even know what you’re wishing for anymore. He comes closer and rests his head on top of yours.

And then he wraps his arms around you and you get flashes of days and nights where there was not enough air for you to breath and your ribs ached.

His action is not so noble. It feels like his body steals all the rationality you have. But it gives you this feeling that there will be no more starless skies at night. And that’s enough for now, so you don’t complain.

His skin feels soft and he smells of sweat and vanilla. Somehow you find that alluring.

He looks at you for a second, like he’s trying to memorize your face. And then he pulls away completely silent.

You try to understand what he’s thinking but he gives nothing away. You were never good at reading people.

You blink and he’s almost out of your apartment.

“Goodnight” he shouts.

“Goodnight” you whisper.

You close the window. You wonder how he will spend the night. He probably won’t sleep soon. He just woke up.

But you can’t sleep either. You just move around in your bed. You sink into the sheets and try to close your eyes.

Your phone buzzes.

He follows you on Instagram.

I need you to be smarter than him.

You go through his profile. You want to think he’s doing the same. You want him to do the same.

His world moves too fast for people like us.

You sigh. Perhaps there could have been a time when you would have stayed away from him, but you can’t pretend to ignore it for much longer. And you’re scared of it. And you’re scared of him.

But you’re more scared of how hard it’s for loneliness to fade. And you wish this doesn’t end like a greek tragedy.

One day of the following week you go out for coffee. The curly haired woman comes with you. You don’t understand why. And while you’re adding more sugar to your espresso, she tells him she loves his acting. She uses all kinds of adjectives to describe it; hopeful and poignant, celestial.

You like the way she talks. She sounds beautiful. You almost envy her abundance of words.

But Sebastian stops listening.

He watches the way your fingers wrap around the sugar box. He can see your nerves and your synapses move underneath your skin and he thinks he’s watching a dance show.

He will never tell you, but it’s then; under the morning sun and with sugar in your hands, that he feels his heart beat with the power of cymbals for the first time.

He thinks you don’t have to know.

He’s wrong.

You learn the girl is an actress herself. They’ll be in the movie together. They look stellar together.

Looking at them, gives you a violent feeling that wrenches your stomach around.

You can’t hate her for that. You feel like it’s more your fault than hers. That feeling however, grabs you by the shoulders and doesn’t let go. You try not to let it show.

But for some reason when Sebastian almost touches your palm, you look at her and you’re certain this is entirely mutual.

You make a silent agreement to not include him in any of this.

“You were extremely quiet earlier.” He says as you reach the building you call home.

He wants to spend time together until his scheduled shooting. You don’t complain.

“You always say that.” You try to joke. He looks right at you.

And then you notice that his eyes aren’t the color of the sea. They’re more grayish blue. They’re like a frozen lake in December.

“I know,” he starts messing with his hair “But you can’t deny you barely talked back there.”

When you enter your apartment, he immediately throws himself on your couch. These last few days it feels like he owns that right spot there in front of your big window.

“I’ve told you, I talk when I have something to say.”

He smiles at your words.

“Then I must be lucky you talk to me.” He whispers softly.

You sit next to him. If you move a little closer you could touch him, feel his warmth. You don’t.

You never thought of how easy it has become to talk to him. You don’t keep your thoughts locked and your teeth clenched around him. And that’s a novice feeling for you.

You let your eyelids fall close and lay back.

There’s a language between you two. It starts with secret glances and whispers and now it contains words that build and ruin bodies and souls.

Sometimes you want to say them all together. Sometimes you just want to open your mouth and let everything flow out but then you’re scared you’ll make him mad. Or you’ll make him love you.

You can’t decide which is worse and that’s enough to stop you.

“What is this thing between us?” He sounds all tender-like, but his blood feels heavy at the moment. He’s not sure if he can keep breathing. He regrets the words that leave his lips, when it’s already too late.

You have the answer figured out long time before he asks. But you’re not ready to give it to him.

“I don’t know” you open your eyes “I don’t know.” You repeat.

He doesn’t tell anyone but sometimes he feels nauseous before a shooting. You can clearly see that now. His pacing up and down the room and his roaming eyes give him away.

You are surprised. You never thought he could be nervous. He looks so confident and radiant all the time; you sometimes forget he is still a regular human being.

“You have no reason to worry.” His lips twitch.

“I know.”

“But you still worry.” You grin and catch his arm to stop him from moving.

The look he gives you is acute.

“You have no reason to be sad,” he starts, without breaking eye contact “but you still are.”

You feel naked and hug yourself close.

It’s very strange to have someone scratch everything from you and see your raw truth. You’re not certain it’s something you enjoy. You wish it didn’t make you quiver.

Sebastian wishes he could scratch deeper under your dermis and your fingernails and slither there between your muscles and your heart where blood runs thick and melancholy hasn’t conquered yet.

“I’m sorry.” He shakes his head.

“You didn’t say anything hurtful.”

You worry your words may come out bitter. You don’t want that.

“It won’t last forever.” he says and then your name appears in his tongue. You like the way he says it. It almost sounds like poetry. “You won’t be sad forever.”

You smile and, in that moment, you aren’t a worldwide known celebrity and a girl in her early twenties. You are just two people seeking comfort.

The same night there’s a party for the first day of shooting. You don’t feel like going, but he doesn’t let you stay home.

What did you do last night?

Went to a party with Sebastian Stan, typical Thursday night.

You can picture the look on everyone’s face. It makes your lips turn upward just a little.

“I told you to be careful.” The voice sounds almost far away but your neighbor is standing right next to you as he mutters.

“I am.” You say with a laugh. He crosses his arms.

“No, you are here, watching him starry-eyed.”

Your fingers start playing with the rough fabric of your dress.

“I don’t know how to stop it.” You whisper.

He tells you to not entail yourself in something you don’t know the way out of. But what does he know about solitude and rushed breaths?

What does he know about a pair of eyes that look like a frozen lake?

Nothing. Nothing at all.

He’s watching you from afar while you talk with Argyris. He notices how your chest moves along with your breathing in a way it looks like it’s made of pure glass.

For a while he thinks of staying there and keep observing you but then Argyris leaves and you’re all alone. And he starts walking closer to you.

All eyes are on him as he goes through the main dance floor. The curly haired actress stops moving to the beat and follows him with her gaze.

They both reach you.

And you know he’s moving towards you before you can see him. It’s like your body is aware of his presence madly fast.

His eyes seem darker under the hazy light.

He grabs your hand.

You almost heave.

“Let’s get out of here.” He breaths.

You walk for some time. It’s late and Athens is quiet around that time. There is only a soft broken sound of cars and you think about that time you saw a car crash happen in front of your eyes.

You sit close in an old dirty staircase in a forgotten back alley. The city has a lot of those, but people don’t notice. They just walk past them, always in a hurry.

Sebastian sighs heavily. He looks at you in a way it makes you think he’s trying to memorize everything. The way midnight air caresses your body, the way red lighting falls in your hair from that street lamp. He looks at you for an indefinite and long period of time and it feels exquisite.

You place your fingers on his palm and the world flickers. He’s still wearing the rings they gave him for the movie and they feel cold against your skin.

“Do you ever miss Romania?”

The question startles him.

“Every day.”

You nod. Maybe he knows more about sorrow than you give him credit for.

“I remember the dog fence and our neighbors’ daughter and the orange sky through my window, minutes before sun set.”

Your hand locks around his and you stay silent for a while.

“This is the Lyra constellation.” His eyes light up as he looks up.

You remember reading about how much he’s into space. It’s intriguing.

“Where?”

He doesn’t let go of your hand. Instead he picks it up and guides it with his own. His body moves closer. There’s no cold in the air.

As your eyes search for the stars that your hands point at, he watches you and he’s certain that one day he’d love to lay on his back, with you on his side and show you all the little dead planets in the sky. Show you the secrets of the universe.

And he feels like this is the type of beauty that musicians try to write songs about.

“Ah!” Your grip becomes tighter and you smile. “I can see it!”

He laughs at your childish enthusiasm.

You laugh too.

And then you let your head fall on his shoulder, your hair touching his bare skin. You don’t blame them for making him wear sleeveless shirts for the film.

You can him feel shudder at your sudden motion, but then he exhales and his muscles relax.

He observes the features of your face from this angle. He almost traces them with his fingers.

“They’re probably going to kill me for stealing you away from the party.” You whisper.

“I think I was the one who grabbed your hand and left.” He laughs again and you can feel his chest pounding.

His phone buzzes. He doesn’t look at it. He closes his eyes.

“Δείξε μου όλα τα αστέρια. ”

He doesn’t understand a word but your voice sounds too close. You feel too close. And that’s almost tearing him apart.

“What does that mean?”

You turn to look at him. The neon sign on the old building behind him keeps trembling.

“It means, show me the stars.”

And he does. And he feels like he could burn alive.

And you will never tell him; but you still think of him when you catch a glimpse of burning stars.

i really appreciate feedback, it motivates me tons and also tell me if you’d like to be tagged :)

tagging: @lharrietg @awkward117 @dannaloureen @broccoligf @cutestfangirlvevo @caitdaniels @arymb @buckybarnesishot310 @roguesthetic @itsaliceheree

#sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan imagine #monday the movie #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #letyoudown

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well-its-not-human-anymore · 3 years

Note

Hi lovely! I just want to say, your writing is amazing!! Do you think you could do little headcanons for each bayverse brother where the reader is almost ALWAYS super happy and chipper, super kind to everyone all the time, but then one time somebody (turtles or readers family, doesn't matter) says something to really piss them off? Like... Teeth clenching, furious, silent, and boiling kind of anger that terrified the SHIT out of them that they've never seen before or expected from them?? 😂

Usually, when my Dad and Stepmom are arguing, the fight is blamed on me because I'm "the oldest" and "the most responsible" and I become extremely upset, completely opposite of what I usually am, and there's nobody I can talk to. Thank you so much, for taking my request!! Love your writing!! -Captain trash 🐌

Ohhhh 💢😡 love this, and I do this all the time. Out here bottling my emotions like I'm canning pickles.

TMNT Headcanons

The boys reacting to the quiet type of rage

Leonardo

you were an absolute angel

this was one thing Leo knew to be true

to him, you were like a carbonated beverage, bubbly and sweet

but what he didn't take into account was that like most carbonated drinks, you always hit just right

he learned that the hard way

no, he wasn't sure what he'd actually said to set you off, but he knew it probably wasn't about him insulting potato chips

you weren't that passionate about potatoes, shockingly enough

but he'd ran his mouth when he shouldn't have and immediate correction was provided via a VERY solid punch to his plastron

then you were up and storming out of the kitchen to your personally designated shelf at the other side of the lair, snarling as you went

you stayed up there for the rest of the day and when dinner came around Leo had to tackle Mikey to the ground to stop him from throwing a paper airplane up into your nest

a wise choice

Splinter was the one who informed you that it was time to eat

Another wise choice

Personally, Leo's never seen anyone eat fettuccine with the afterthought of murdering god but damn if you didn't look like you were considering it

Your jaw was clenched so tight that he feared you'd break your teeth

He felt bad of course, how couldn't he? But he also knew from experience that it was best to leave you be until you came down from your anger

Raphael

Now, Raph is no stranger when it comes to anger or rage, especially the silent type

He likes to think he knows it better than anyone

But holy shit- he never expected it from you

You were always kind and sweet and every other synonym for those words under the rainbow

In fact, Raph had gone so far as to assume that you didn't have a mean bone in your body

That turned out to be lie

The argument was something dumb, it had to be, but it quickly escalated. Much faster than he thought it could

And he made the mistake of running his mouth

"Oh yeah? And what could you ever get outta being with a freak like me, huh?!"

Big mistake

He actively watched your face darken and your lip curl into a snarl

"You need to stop using your appearance to win arguments."

And then he had to watch as you turned your back on him and simply walked away

You were silent at dinner, only speaking when you needed the salt or something else

You declined all offers to be walked home and left by yourself

They could all tell by your stature and your tense jaw that caused the veins in your neck to bulge that you were beyond pissed

Despite that Raph still received your text informing him that you made it home safe

But that was all

Two days went by before he showed up at your apartment to apologize

You'd never been one to hold a grudge against anyone

Especially not your boyfriend

You accepted his apology and he hasn't crossed that line since

Donatello

From the day he met you, Donnie knew you were different

Your social anxiety and self esteem overlapped in some of the worst possible ways

But damn if you weren't an absolute sweetheart around everyone else

You defended your friends better than Fort Knox security and that was a fact

So in truth he really shouldn't have been surprised by your outburst

But in his defense he'd only ever seen you react verbally, yelling, threatening, the works

When they were all returning from a scouting routine that night the last thing Donnie wanted to listen to was Leo's lecture

Donnie had gotten in a little too far and banged himself up, bleeding from a few cuts and scrapes but nothing major

And none of them had realized that you were there

So when Leo went in for an attack on Donnie's intelligence and worth you'd done the only reasonable thing you could think of

The glass bottle shattered on the wall next to Leo's head and sent them all ducking and covering their faces

You stood opposite of them, murder dancing in your eyes like a ballerina

You pinned Leo with your gaze and held him there for a painfully long minute

Then you were taking Donnie's hand and pulling him to the needle room

You were both silent while you patched him up and he was relieved to know that your anger wasn't directed at him

Your entire body practically melted when he touched your cheek

"You're going to break your teeth if you keep that up."

"Well I've never been one for self preservation now have I?"

Michaelangelo

You and Mikey's personality and mentality were basically identical

You might as well have operated on the same vibrational frequency

He just worked so well with you

If it wasn't for the fact that he clearly wasn't human you could've been twins

It wasn't that you were necessarily angry with him at that moment, but the argument you were having was quickly escalating so you both opted to shut it down before it got any worse

Things usually turned out better when you both went nonverbal

Ended with way less hurt feelings than it could have

But you both found it best to take some time alone during these situations, things were easier to smooth over if you were both calm

The others found this terrifying however

Because silent, angry you was one thing

Silent and angry Mikey was another thing entirely

But fortunately you both typically resolved things rather quickly after giving each other some space

I know the last one is a little off but I kinda ran out of ideas and brain power. The dreaded wall of writer's block has hit me and I think I just made a nest under it and took a nap. But in all honesty this week has really stressed me out so I apologize for the lack of postings. I'm doing my best to get back into it. Thank you all for being patient with me. 🧡

-Mars 🌠

#tmnt bayverse #tmnt headcanons #tmnt x reader #writing blog #writing requests #askbox #ask response #tmnt leonardo #tmnt raphael #tmnt donatello #tmnt michelangelo

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justkending · 3 years

Text

Is that seriously your password? (Birthday One-shots)

Prompt: Is that seriously your password?

Challenge: justkending Birthday drabbles and one-shots

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 2100+

A/N: This was asked for a by anon, so thank you to whoever you may be! I thought this was cute little one-shot once it came to me! Also, coming up with the password took me a seconds, but then I heard Sebastian's voice in my head and well... Here we are;)

“Hey FRIDAY? Who all from the team is in the compound?” Y/N shouted from Tony’s lab where she was working on a new piece of equipment for her uniform.

“Everyone is out either on a mission or off the compound premises for personal business,” the AI responded. “However, Sergeant Barnes is in the living room reading.”

“He works. Can you ask him to come down here?” she continued, never breaking from her computer screen she was typing away on in front of her.

“Of course,” FRIDAY responded before going quiet for a minute and speaking back up. “He seemed rather confused by the request, but he’s on his way.”

“Always paranoid that one,” Y/N mumbled before shouting a thank you and going back to typing a storm.

A few minutes later, Bucky cautiously peaked through the glass doors to the lab and saw Y/N completely entranced in whatever she was working on in front of her. She was typing and scanning the screen quickly and then immediately turning to a notebook beside her to write whatever it was down.

“Why are you calling me down here out of all people?” he said almost concerned.

“Because everyone else is either fighting bad guys or off away from the compound doing their own thing,” she responded, finally breaking away from her computer screen upon hearing his voice.

“Oh,” he nodded before looking around and hesitantly coming in more.

He didn’t care to come down to Stark’s personal man cave much. Tony still threw sarcastic insults and passive jokes at him every once in a while even though they had made up and moved on. But it was Tony. He was kinda that way with everyone. Either way, they only really crossed paths if they absolutely needed too.

“Here, come here for a second,” she waved him over, pushing back her chair as she stood up and stretched some.

Bucky listened even though his face showed he was confused and hesitant about it all. It wasn’t Y/N either. They were actually good friends after all the missions and team dinner and movie nights of getting to know each other. They shared a lot in common. She was an old soul for a pretty young member of the crew and Bucky admired that. Because of her mannerisms and interest, they got a long rather quick. It made it easy for them to instantly click.

“What are you doing?” he asked when he saw her raise her hands and projections of pieces of her suit for missions popped up in pieces in the air with what looked like notes and statistics floating around them. The blueprints for it all lit up in front of them without a screen to stay on. He may never get used to the advancement of technology because anytime he saw something new, something crazier would pop up soon after.

“I came up with some new little tricks for my suit. It’s not not a bad outfit, but there’s always something new that can be better and improved,” she shrugged, moving the pieces around in the air with her fingers.

Oh yeah, and next to Tony and Banner, the woman could maneuver through almost any form of technology as if it was as easy as learning how to count to 10 on your fingers.

“I only have the metal on the bottom of my boots, and it’s worked for this long. But, I feel like there’s ways I can discreetly add more throughout the suit without weighing it down, making it easier to maneuver when I’m airborne.”

Another note to know, Y/N was an enhanced. She had the ability to bend and manipulate any form of metal. So the metal that Tony had built into her shoes made it to where she could lift herself off ground level and fly. However, through trial and error, they noticed that they couldn’t really add it to many other places as it weighed her down and made fighting a lot less agile. Don’t get it wrong though. She made it work. She just preferred it to be better.

“Sounds like a smart idea.” He paused in the silence as she continued to analyze the layout in front of her silently. “Did you just want company to show off that big brain of yours, or am I supposed to give you an opinion?”

He was sassy with her. She was sassy back. It was the way of their friendship for the most part.

“No, Barnes. I need you to give me your password,” she said, wrinkling her nose at him with a stink face before moving back to the computer. He chuckled at her facial expression and followed her to her setup.

“Why do you need my password? You have your own account,” he questioned, watching as she went to log into the files under SHIELD's confidentials.

“No, actually. Mine went caput last night,” she huffed. “Some weird glitch happened, don’t ask me how because you would think Stark tech is more advanced, but whatever caused it made my account go haywire. In saying that...” She clicked a few more things moving faster than Bucky could keep up with on the screen. Then she turned to him and leaned back on the counter. “Tony was supposed to make me a new one or fix it, but he bailed on me today for brunch with Pepper... In Capri.” She let out a big breath. “So until he gets back, I’m at a standstill getting the information I need to fix this.” The smile on her face showed she was done telling her story.

“So you need my password to get confidential information?” he asked, crossing his arms and putting his weight onto one leg. “What kind of confidential stuff are we talking here because I don’t need Tony going through my history and asking me questions I can’t answer,” he pointed with raised eyebrows.

“Highly doubt he cares or has the time to go through your history, Buck,” she laughed, turning back around and raising her hand with a swift motion bringing the chair to her without actually touching it.

Bucky looked down at it as it moved and noticed the metal base of it. He was always shocked anytime she used her powers. For one, she was rather graceful with her own for the most part, so the act of watching her do it, was somewhat mesmerizing. But also, he was still trying to wrap his head around people born with abilities like that. Wanda really threw him for a loop the first time he met her.

Shaking out his head and following to stand by where she was sitting, he argued with her statement.

“Yeah, I’d think about that again,” he winced. “Out of all the people Tony is going to keep an extra eye on, who do you think it is?”

Y/N paused and turned to him scrunching her nose.

“Ok, yeah you’re right,” she nodded. Bucky sent her a look in agreement. “But I promise it’s not for anything crazy. I just want to find a resource for the lightest metal we can get our hands on. I think if I can get some of that, I can place it throughout my suit to not weigh it down as much and make any hand to hand combat about 100x easier and more fluent.”

“Sounds like a solid plan. What file do you think is going to hold something like that?” he nodded, crossing his arms again and leaning his backside on the table facing her in her chair.

“The same one that talks about vibranium,” she sassed some. “I just want to run some analytics to see my options on what will be most malleable for the suite. Some metals may be lighter, but that doesn’t always mean suitable for tons of kinesthetic motions.”

“You’re too smart for your own good,” he shook his head, smiling at her.

“I know. I got the beauty and brains,” she smiled with a shrug, but she was playing around. Y/N was never one to boast about herself. She was as humble as Tony was egotistical. “Ok, enough small talk. What’s your password, Barnes?”

All that was left to do on the page she had pulled up was type in said password and she was in.

“Uh, I don’t really want to say it outloud,” he said, becoming bashful all of a sudden. His arms tightening around him self consciously.

“Why?” Y/N asked with a tilt of her head. “Scared I’ll remember it and hack your account? May just search for some things that Tony would love to tease you about.”

“Haha,” he said flatly. “And no. I know for a fact you would never do that. You’re too nice for that,” he responded. “It’s just. It’s an embarrassing password.”

“It can’t be that bad. Come on, just say it Mister so I can get my research done!” she persisted, poking his flesh arm.

“Here, let me just type it,” he said, moving to the keyboard.

“Nuh-uh,” she said moving the keyboard with a flick of her wrist out of his reach. Damn practically everything for having some form of metal in it. “I’m too intrigued now. I want to know what it is…” The mischievous gleam in her eye showed Bucky he probably wasn’t going to win this.

“What happened to your sweet innocent self?” he said slightly shocked by her antics, but not able to hold back a chuckled.

“It’s her off day today. She needed a break… And a little fun,” she smiled wider. “Come on. Just tell me. I promise I won’t make fun of you.”

“I don’t think you can keep that promise.”

“Have I ever not?”

“I mean that one time when you promised to make chocolate chip pancakes because I was having a bad day, and then ditched me for a mission,” he noted. The fake hurt was exaggerated in his eyes.

“Hey! I have no control over when something like that comes up,” she pointed at him. “You know that too on a personal level.”

“Still never got those pancakes though,” he said, letting out a disappointed sigh as he shook his head.

“Ugh, fine. How about this?” she started, leaning back in her chair. “You tell me your password, and if I laugh then I go make you those famous pancakes now. If I don’t laugh, you have to drop that whole thing and not bring it up again.”

He weighed his options watching her. The two staring into each others eyes bargaining in silence. Sure Bucky didn’t want to say his password, but worse case scenario she laughed, maybe teased him a litt, but he got pancakes. And he knew she would laugh…

“Fine. But just know, I like my pancakes with extra chocolate,” he sighed, relaxing his muscles some. “And whip cream.”

“Won’t need to. I’m tough enough to not react to whatever it is,” she smiled, bringing the keyboard back over. “Ok, so what is it?”

He stayed silent for a minute. God, he hated saying it outloud. Not that he really ever had to, but still. It was embarrassing.

“It’s… It’s WienerSoldier1917,” he mumbled.

“I’m sorry, what?” Y/N said with wider eyes. She heard him, but she was wondering if she heard him right.

“The W and S are capitalized…” he practically whispered looking down. When he didn’t hear a response but insead deafening silence, he looked over seeing her biting her lip and trying her best to suppress a laugh. Her face became slightly red and her eyes started blinking fast as she tried to pull herself together. “Yeah, I’m definitely getting those pancakes,” he sighed with a shake of his head, not being able to hold back his own soft smile.

Not even two seconds later, Y/N was in a laughing fit. Practically falling out of the chair. If Bucky hadn’t caught her when he did, she would have gone over the side and brought the chair down with her, but he casually kept the chair from tipping with one arm.

“Oh, that’s just too good,” she finally got out after a few minutes of full on, stomach aching laughing. She wiped her eyes at the few tears that had come down and shook her head. “Is that seriously your password?”

“You know Tony came up with it! And he knows I don’t know how to change it!” Bucky defended.

“Oh, Tony. What a comedian…” Y/N sighed, catching her breath. “Ok, back to business.” She typed in the password not being able to hold back yet another round of laughs as she typed it out. Bucky just rubbed his temple as she went about her research and giggled.

After pulling up a few things, she turned to him.

“Ok, I own you a batch of pancakes now,” she smiled, standing and organizing the desktop. “I’ll come back and finish up down here later.”

“You’re not even upset you laughed, are you?” Bucky said following her in step to the door.

“Oh, I knew I was going to already with how you were acting. I also knew I was hungry and up for something sweet anyway,” she shrugged. “Win, win for me.”

“You’re a punk,” Bucky faked shock, nudging her shoulder with his own before opening the door for her.

“Eh, like I said. Sweet-innocent Y/N, as you called her, has a day off,” she smiled up at him before wrapping her arm through his. “Hey, and after breakfast? I’ll show you how to change your password,” she looked up at him with a wink.

The two chuckling and talking as they walked upstairs arm and arm to the kitchen.

My Lovelies forever:

@natura1phenomenon @lauravicente @kakakatey @traceyaudette @notyourtypicalrose @laneygthememequeen @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce @sandlee44 @thorne93 @thefaithfulwriter @marvelfansworld @essie1876 @greyeyedsmile14 @capsiclehan @xostephanie @averyrogers83 @awesomenursingstudent @gh0stgurl @cs-please @carls1022 @jjlevin @rainbowkisses31 @carls1022 @anise-d-castle6 @deannotmoose @their-bibliophile @kitkatd7 @willowbleedsonpaper @mariaenchanted @snffbeebee @couldabeenamermaid @rebekahdawkins @alyispunk

Bucky Barnes Tags:

@chloe-skywalker @charmedbysarge @jbarness

@bellamy-barnes

Marvel Tags:

@thejourneyneverendsx @death-unbecomes-you @heyiamthatbitch @lizzymacy555 @srrymydood @xa-dia @redhairedfeistynerd @morganclaire4 @connie326 @captain-asguard @mollygetssherlockcoffee @teenagedreams-bucky @shower-me-with-roses

#bucky barnes one shot #Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel bucky barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes drabble #bucky barnes x y/n

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lloydskywalkers · 3 years

Note

Heyo! Hope your doing exceptionally well, wonderful and ur staying safe! I was reading ur little oneshots for the movie! Verse and instantly fell in love! Think u have anymore for Kai and Lloyd? (But u don’t need to listen to this, obviously hehe) Have a splendid day!

ahhH thank you, I hope you’re doing well too!! :D oh man it’s been so long since i’ve written something for movie-verse, but I’ve had this little snippet in my head for a while so I guess it’s as good a time as any (and it is, of course, about kai and lloyd bc when is it noT)

it’s a little different than what i usually write, for movie-verse? but i hope it fits the bill! (takes place pre-movie, btw)

Of all his friends, Lloyd thinks Kai is most like the sun. Not just for his codename, and the enthusiasm with which he brings fire to the team, metaphorically and far too often literally, but for how bright he is. Kai reminds Lloyd of the sun at full force, strong and blazing and staunchly refusing to let anyone hide from his warmth. An endlessly combusting ball of stubbornness and passion.

Kai also reminds Lloyd of the sun in the way that he possesses about the same amount of brain cells the sun does, which is zero, because the sun has no brain — much like Kai.

“Hey, ru—de, ow, stop—”

Kai’s petulant response strangles off in cracked pain as Lloyd hushes him, simultaneously pulling the alcohol-soaked cloth from his arm with a sympathetic wince.

“Sorry, sorry,” Lloyd murmurs, wringing the edge of the cloth. “But I’ve gotta — it’ll get infected, if you don’t—”

“Nah, s’okay,” Kai says, breath hissing out through clenched teeth. He gives Lloyd a wavering smile that could almost be encouraging, were he not bleeding over Lloyd’s faded bedspread. “Just caught me off guard, I’m good now. ‘Sides, the — the stitches are gonna be worse, so—”

“It won’t be that bad,” Lloyd promises him, cleaning the rest of the deep slashes that run across Kai’s arm as quickly as he can. The lower ones aren’t so bad — he could get away without stitches, maybe. It’s the uppermost one that scares Lloyd, cutting deep enough into Kai’s skin to pose a threat. And Lloyd has no intention of leaving Kai anywhere near in danger, especially with the reason he’s hurt in the first place.

Lloyd swallows against the thick lump that suddenly forms in his throat, trying to banish the flood of emotions that have been rising since the battle against his father’s forces earlier. Surprise, shock, gratitude—? A swirling maelstrom of a deep-seated kind of aching warmth Lloyd is utterly unfamiliar with. It leaves him off-kilter, and words don’t come easily as they usually do.

Not that words ever come easily to Lloyd, but normally he isn’t quite this stuttering. Maybe. He hopes not. Maybe he’s just hyperaware right now, after everything, and he always sounds this embarrassing.

“I promise,” Lloyd continues, yanking himself from his thoughts as he busies with the needle. “I’ve got a lot of experience, and I’ll be gentle.”

Kai watches Lloyd threading the needle with a thinly-veiled fear, but he nods, the bravado Lloyd’s more familiar with making its way across his face. “Nice,” he says. “I trust you, Dr. Lloyd.”

Lloyd’s hands falter with the needle for a moment, before he resumes sterilizing it, ducking his head. Kai sounds like he means it — Kai sounds like he means everything he says, but the way he says trust hits differently, for Lloyd.

They’ve only been a team for few months, now. Not very long at all, to form any kind of trust in the son of your greatest enemy. Lloyd’s been going to school with some of the same people since kindergarten, and they’ve never looked at him with anything kinder than hatred, much less trust. And yet Kai is here, offering him his bleeding arm in Lloyd’s tiny room, trusting him to repair the damage he only took because he was protecting Lloyd.

Lloyd doesn’t understand. He doesn’t — people don’t — but his team—

They listened to him. Actually listened to him, to Lloyd. They actually listen to him in general, have since they were all thrown together in this odd little grouping, but it hasn’t quite hit home in the way it did tonight, when he’d snapped orders at them in barely-restrained panic, Kai’s blood staining his fingers as he’d staunched the knife wounds meant for him.

They hadn’t flinched back at his raised voice. Lloyd never raises his voice — he’s learned to keep it quiet, soft, unassuming. Even the slightest slip of frustration is enough to send anyone around him murmuring in suspicion, eyes narrowing and hissed whispers of just like his father filling the air.

Lloyd’s voice had been sharp and strained, barking across the rooftop, and they’d listened. No one flinched back, no eyes widened in fear — they’d just listened. They’re still listening, carrying out Lloyd’s orders without question, and it’s — it’s dizzying, if Lloyd had to put a word to it.

Cole and Zane are taking care of clean-up — something Lloyd will have to thank them for later, profusely. Neither were particularly happy about letting Kai out of their sights, but Cole and Zane are better at keeping each other steady than anyone else. It was the right call, Lloyd knows it was. Hopes it was.

But Lloyd hasn’t been having much faith in his calls, tonight. Not after Kai went down.

He swallows, focusing on the sounds reverberating from behind his closed door. Nya and Jay are talking with his mother, Nya’s louder tones easier to hear as she laughs. Lloyd knows her well enough to catch the strain in it, but he knows it’ll fool his mother. They’re distraction — Lloyd’s house was closest, and he’s got the best supplies stashed there. No one questions why he’s the one with the fully stocked medical kit, but Lloyd suspects they’ve all drawn their own conclusions.

He wishes they’d believe him, when he says it’s because he’s worried for them. He grew up with Wu as his uncle, who picks fights on a daily basis — with Morro as his cousin, who picks fights on an hourly basis. Lloyd knows the importance of having the good kind of medical supplies.

He finishes prepping the needle, squeezing Kai’s wrist briefly in warning. Lloyd’s not usually a tactile person — not that anyone would let him be — but he knows Kai soaks up touch like a starved sponge, and Lloyd’s desperate to give any kind of comfort he can before he starts with the needle.

Kai swallows, fixing his eyes firmly on the faded glow-in-the-dark stars plastered across Lloyd’s ceiling.

“Okay,” he says, his voice tight. “Bring it on.”

Lloyd swallows, steels himself, and sets the needle against his skin. Kai flinches at the first prick, eyes squeezing shut briefly, but otherwise he doesn’t move, jaw set stubbornly as Lloyd moves quickly. For his part, Lloyd keeps his eyes locked on the stitches, his hands steady. For all that Lloyd’s made up of bouncing nerves half the time, his hands rarely shake. Never when patching wounds up. He’s always been proud of how steady he can hold a needle, and tonight is no exception.

It’s the least he can do.

Kai suddenly tenses up, a broken-off noise strangling in his throat. Lloyd’s heart twists, but he stays steady, rallying himself. Conversation — Kai likes talking, right? Distraction, he can do that.

“So, um,” Lloyd stutters. On second thought, he’s awful at small talk. But — for Kai. “The way you took down that last guy was, it was really cool. Where’d you learn that?”

Kai bites his lip, exhaling shakily before he answers. “I train too, you know.”

Lloyd’s mouth quirks, despite himself. “Not like that.”

“What, a ninja can’t — can’t get creative,” Kai replies, through half-gritted teeth. Lloyd doesn’t say anything, but Kai rolls his eyes, continuing. “Fine. When I was younger, I ah…might’ve taken a few dance classes. For Nya! ‘Cause I couldn’t let her go alone, y’know, but they were — they were kinda fun, I guess, and maybe they slip into fighting, sometimes.” His cheeks darken, and Lloyd bites back a quiet laugh.

“Nothing like Cole, obviously, ‘cause he’s an actual dancer, but — that’s where I got it from.” He pins Lloyd with a glare, that’s somewhat dimmed by the scrunched expression of pain on his face. “Tell anyone and you’re dead though, okay?”

Lloyd hums his agreement, too focused on the stitches to reply immediately. After a moment, though, he speaks up again. “I did some ballet, when I was little.”

“No way,” Kai says, sounding delighted.

“Yeah, way,” Lloyd says. “I’ve heard from a very reliable source that dancing backgrounds are useful, with ninja stuff.”

“Very reliable meaning your uncle,” Kai grins.

Lloyd shrugs. “Maybe,” he half-smiles. Kai suddenly sucks in another pained breath, but to Lloyd’s relief, it’s likely the last one. He finishes off the stitches with a well-practiced hand, snapping the end of the thread and exhaling in relief.

“There. All done.”

Kai’s eyes widen. “Seriously, already?” He glances down at his arm, his other hand moving up to touch the stitches. Lloyd smacks it away, glaring at him.

“Don’t touch. You still have to watch out for infection. I’ll text you instructions for taking care of it, and everything. Just don’t do anything, ah…”

“No ninja-ing?” Kai finishes for him, crestfallen.

“Probably a good idea,” Lloyd says, apologetic. “But it’s not too bad. Shouldn’t take long, and you can be out, uh, ninja-ing again."

Kai is quiet for a moment, regarding his stitches. Then he turns to Lloyd, who is immediately staggered at the bright smile that stretches across his face.

“Cool. Thanks, Lloyd. You’re good at this.”

Lloyd can’t answer, his throat burning. He forces the welling moisture back, looking away. Kai’s only hurt for him, and that is layered with so much more meaning than Lloyd can comprehend right now.

“No problem,” Lloyd mutters, focusing instead on the voices outside his door in an attempt to find footing again. He can hear his mom laughing at something Nya’s said, open and relaxed in a way his mom rarely is. Lloyd’s heart twists into knots.

He doesn’t deserve them, any of them. Not really.

If Kai reminds Lloyd of the sun, then the rest of the team reminds him of stars. All bright and shining, bursting with warmth in their own way. Maybe not quite at the blazing heat that Kai does, but Nya is a north star if Lloyd’s ever needed one. Jay’s a blinking constellation, scattered stars that form a complex whole much larger than you’d thought. Cole’s the kind of star you see first pop up over the horizon, blending with the oranges and purples of the sunset, like a painting you’d see in soft watercolors. Zane’s the early-morning kind of star, the ones that stay stubbornly after the night’s left, dotting the pale morning with a calm steadiness.

Lloyd would be a planet, he supposes, caught in faithful orbit around the five people who have somehow, for some reason, given him a chance. It’d be generous, though. No, Lloyd is content just to be a moon — with no light of his own, reflecting only the brilliance others give him the best he can.

Kai’s finger taps the edge of his forehead, snapping Lloyd from his thoughts, and he blinks in confusion.

“Lost you there, again,” Kai asks, words mangled through a yawn. “Where’d you go?”

Lloyd shakes his head, turning his attention back to the bloodied thread leftover in his hands. His stomach turns, and he quickly sets it aside. “Just thinking.” He pauses, momentarily lost for words. He settles for jerking his head toward the window, where the smoke trailing from their hard-won battle is still visible against the dark sky, and gives Kai a wry smile. “How much do you wanna bet the cheerleading team comes up with a new song tomorrow?”

It’s been an inside joke for them, the ridiculous songs Chen and his gang keep coming up with to throw at Lloyd, and normally it gets a laugh from Kai. This time, though, Kai is silent, his eyes searching as he stares at Lloyd. Lloyd shifts under the attention, caught off-guard again. He doesn’t know what kind of look this is, that Kai’s giving him.

“They shouldn’t talk about you like that,” Kai finally says. His voice is quiet, but Lloyd can spot the brewing anger in it. Kai’s always got anger to spare.

“Sticks and stones, remember?” Lloyd shakes his head. He’s learned, after a while, that anger changes nothing. “Words will never hurt me.”

“Words hurt when people are throwing sticks and stones at you while they yell about your dad,” Kai grumbles.

“No one’s thrown rocks since second grade, actually.”

“Hm.” Kai’s tone is a mix of thinly withheld anger and mild amusement. Lloyd tilts his head, confused, and Kai gives a huff, anger tugging loose.

“Y’know, people say that if kids throw rocks at you in second grade, it means they’ve got a crush on you.”

Lloyd knows well enough it’s a joke, but he flushes red anyways, heat spreading across his cheeks. “Yeah, sure,” he stammers. Kai laughs at his reaction, though, the odd kind of anger departing, and Lloyd feels he’s found his footing again.

They’re quiet as Lloyd finishes cleaning up the medical supplies, Kai nodding sleepily on his bed while Lloyd carefully washes the needle in the bathroom sink. Maybe he can convince his mom to let Kai spend the night, he thinks. Jay and Nya , too — their apartment isn’t very big, but it’s awfully late to make them walk home, and Lloyd is fine with taking the floor, if he needs to.

Lloyd nods to himself, resolving to ask her once he’s finished hiding the evidence. His mom’s been so thrilled about him having people over at all, he can’t see her saying no. A smile pulls at his lips as he listens to the conversation outside his door again. Jay’s rambling on now, bright and excited without any of his usual reservation. He feels a pang, wondering if Jay’s the same as him — wondering if they’re all the same, playing at muted caricatures of themselves, too fearful to let whatever lies beneath shine through.

He wonders what it means, that they’re the ones with the city in their hands, that weight on their shoulders. Wonders what it means, that Lloyd feels safer with bullets strafing the air around him and his mask on, than he ever has with it off. That Green Ninja will always, always sound better than Lloyd in his ears.

“Hey, uh.”

Lloyd starts at Kai’s voice, twisting the sink off as he turns to face him. Kai looks half asleep, but the smile he gives him is bright as ever.

“Thanks, seriously. Not just for this, but for looking out for us. You’re a good friend.”

Lloyd’s heart skips a beat, his brain latching onto the word friend and holding on tightly, tucking it somewhere safe inside his chest.

“So thanks, Lloyd,” Kai yawns, barely awake at all now, but still stubbornly clinging to the threads of awareness.

Lloyd’s got his own thank you to give back, twisted and strangled behind whatever lump’s formed in his throat, but Kai’s snoring before he gets the chance to say it. So Lloyd tugs the edge of his comforter over his friend — his friend — instead, and runs the words over in his mind again and again, like a treasured line from a book.

On second thought. Maybe Lloyd isn’t so bad. He’s only ever liked his name the way his mom says it, without any of the snapping, harsh emphasis others give it. In others’ mouths, Lloyd’s name is a curse. In his mom’s, Lloyd’s name belongs to a person.

But he thinks, maybe, he likes the way it sounds when his teammates use it, too.

#answered #ninjago #tlnm #lloyd garmadon #kai smith #slight blood tw #i just. have a lot of feelings about friends #and a lot of thoughts about how the movie!ninja put each other on pedestals #not in an inherently bad way but #i think they all think so much of each other #they forget they're human #and that leads to fallout #anyways! movie bros T-T #my fic #masterofswag213

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deancasheadcanons · 3 years

Text

Something Only I Would Know

[ao3]

1.7k words

15x20 fix-it (kinda), warning for Dean being ableist, thanks to @saywhatjessie for letting me use her headcanon that Dean could’ve been paralyzed by the rusty nail

Just as Dean was hoisting his left leg onto his bed, one of the phones rang in the library. He sighed and moved his leg rest back into place, then wheeled out to the hallway, hoping he could get to the phone in time. Sam was on a hunt with Eileen out in Iowa, and Jody and Claire were taking out some werewolves up in Nowhere, Michigan, but other than that, nobody else should be calling.

He didn’t make it in time. As he sifted through the phones to figure out where the missed call came from, something crashed in the kitchen.

“Who’s there?” he yelled forcefully, grabbing a shotgun from a table before pushing himself to the kitchen.

“Son of a bitch,” a familiar voice said just as Dean turned the corner.

He looked right at himself, all six-foot-one of himself standing in the middle of the kitchen, his legs working just fine.

“Oh, you gotta be fucking kidding me,” other Dean said, progressively raising his voice until the end of the sentence was a shout. He glared up at the ceiling. “I’m gonna kill you, Chuck!”

“Which universe are you from?” Dean asked calmly.

Other Dean glared down at him, jaw clenched. “The real one. And you’re obviously from one where I’m bad enough at my job to land myself in a goddamn wheelchair. That’s real great.”

“No,” Dean said, sizing his other self up. “You’re too much like me.” A memory came back to him, something he said to himself in a situation similar to this one, years ago. “Tell me something only I would know.”

“Oh come on, don’t quote me to me.” Other Dean took a beer out of the fridge and tossed the cap in the direction of the trash can. “Although if you’re from a different universe, I guess you wouldn’t have a memory of that. I must just say the same shit in every version of myself.”

“I do have a memory of it.”

They glared at each other.

Dean said, “Camp Chitaqua.”

Other Dean blinked. “Yeah, OK.” He took a long pull from his beer, staring pointedly at the wheelchair as he did. “What year is it?”

“It’s 2022.”

Other Dean dropped into a chair at the kitchen table. “Ah, fuck. How’d we end up crippled?”

“No. Tell me something only I would know.”

Other Dean stared at him, annoyed. He lost the staring contest after half a minute, shaking his head and scoffing and then taking another long drink of beer. He then looked down at the table and said loudly, “Cas.”

“Excuse me?”

Other Dean raised his eyes. “He told me he loved—he said he loved me. And that he realized he couldn’t have what he wanted. And then the Empty took him.”

Dean ran his tongue along his top teeth. “OK, you are me.” He pushed his wheelchair forward and moved the shotgun from his lap to the table. “And you must be from 2020.”

“Oh goddamn it, I’m gonna lose my legs that soon?” Other Dean stood and said, “Christ, I need a stronger drink.”

“We don’t have anything stronger.”

“What?”

“I don’t drink anymore. The beer is for everybody else that comes through here.”

Other Dean sat back down. “Is Sam—”

“On a hunt with Eileen. Everybody’s fine. Well, except.” Dean gestured to the room and shook his head.

“Except your legs?”

He leveled himself with an impatient glare. “No. It’s a C7 spinal cord injury, and it’s really not that big of a fucking deal. I was talking about Cas.”

Other Dean looked at his beer bottle, picking at the label with his thumbs. “Chuck is trying to show us that we have no free will. He threw me here to prove that I can’t change anything about our lives.”

“Oh, like The Time Traveler’s Wife?”

Other Dean made a face at him, but then his eyebrows raised in realization. “Right, we read that a couple years ago. Man, I forgot about that. Yeah. Like, why would I try to bring Cas back if I’m sitting here with you now, and you’re telling me Cas never came back? So what’s the point of me trying to bring him back if I already know he’s not here in 2022?”

Dean’s eyebrows knit together as he thought for a minute. Eventually he said, “I know you’re me because I never told anybody that Cas is in love with me.”

“Whoa, whoa, he didn’t say—”

“Oh, shut the fuck up.” Dean swallowed. “Let me tell you something, alright? You’re gonna spend a couple months having no fucking idea what to do with yourself, no clue how to cope, so you and Sam are gonna try to do some run-of-the-mill hunts, and guess what? On the very first one you’re gonna break your fucking back after being impaled on some shitty nail in the wall. You’re gonna spend six months laid up in bed feeling sorry for yourself, drinking yourself stupid, wanting to die, praying yourself hoarse to Cas, and Cas is not gonna fucking show up!”

He took a ragged breath and continued, “And Jack doesn’t either. And then Sam’s gonna tell you that he needs you to get your shit together, and it’s not because he needs your help saving the world or even just needs your help on a hunt, it’s because he wants to get married, wants to marry Eileen, so you’re gonna put your sorry life back together enough to be the best man at your brother’s wedding, and that’s when you’re gonna realize that there’s more to your shit life than the selfish things that you want—things like, I don’t know, being able to walk? And having Cas.” He closed his eyes. “You’re gonna realize that Cas meant that he was in love with you, that he wanted to be with you, and you’re gonna have to deal with the enormity of that. That this—that a being so ancient and so huge and literally so incomprehensible to you that your ears bled the first time you heard him speak—that he could learn love? From your sorry ass? Look at me, Dean. Listen to what I’m saying to you.”

He waited until other Dean looked him in the eye. “Eventually you’re gonna accept the fact that Cas lived thousands of years without doing anything other than following the will of heaven, never changing course, only to meet you and learn love so completely that the only thing he wants is to be with you. The first selfish, human desire of his life. You. And you didn’t even get the time to process it, to tell him that you love him, too, before he was gone. So the best you can do is try to actually live your fucking life, because he died to save you.”

The silence between them was heavy. Eventually other Dean said, “Why are you telling me this?”

“Because I never told anybody. Listen to me, Chuck said Cas didn’t do what he was supposed to do. He wasn’t supposed to fall in love with you—us. He changed things when he told you. So you can change things, too. Go back to your time and fucking tell somebody. Is Jack still around? For fuck’s sake, tell Jack.”

“I can’t—everything you just told me, I can’t—I haven’t…”

“Dean, listen. I know. I know how you feel. I know you, and I know you don’t trust yourself, but look at me. I’m different than you, alright? You can trust me. I just threw two years of emotional processing at you, of course you can’t deal with that. But you can do just one thing. Just one. Tell Jack.”

Other Dean studied his face. “You really are different.”

“Yeah, well.” Dean shrugged and looked at his legs. “Turns out being loved by a cosmic being changes you.”

“And being paralyzed.”

“No, trust me, that’s easier to deal with.”

Other Dean huffed a small laugh and nodded. “Uh, what are you gonna do? What happens now?”

“Don’t worry about me, you just—”

A loud crack cut Dean off, then his other self disappeared out of existence. He looked around the kitchen warily, as if something dramatic was about to happen. Instead, a phone once again began ringing in the library.

As Dean wheeled through the hallway, he felt a splitting headache and had to stop and close his eyes. Images flashed through his brain, mostly of him and Cas, and then they abruptly stopped and he felt fine. The phone was still ringing.

He only made it a few more feet before the headache returned, worse than before. Images, so fast and loud in his head that it felt like his brain would explode. When they stopped, he blinked his eyes open and had a realization.

“It’s not The Time Traveler’s Wife. It’s—” he did a 180 in his wheelchair and breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of Cas standing at the end of the hall. “ — Looper.”

“Ah, we’ve finally caught up, then?” Cas said shyly as he walked toward Dean. He squatted in front of him, not in a patronizing way, but as a gesture of trust, submission. “You said it would be soon. You made me watch Looper so I would understand . Does your head feel alright?”

Dean put his hand to Cas’ face, delicately, like he might disappear if he touched him too much. “Cas.”

Cas turned his head and kissed Dean’s palm, then held his hand against his face and smiled at him. “I’m right here.”

The memories kept coming back to Dean, the changed timeline, his past self defeating Chuck and immediately telling Jack that he had to bring Cas back because he never got the chance to tell him he loved him, too. Then—still getting hurt on a hunt, still needing time to process and adjust, to give up drinking, learn how to accept Cas’ love and to love Cas properly in return—but easier this time, because Cas was there. Cas gave him space and time, all while loving him and taking care of him.

Dean took a deep breath. “C’mere, Cas.”

He didn’t wait. He pulled Cas up into his arms and buried his face in his neck and said, “I love you, you can have me. You can have me forever.”

Cas laughed gently. “I know, Dean. I love you, too.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

NOTES:

The Time Traveler's Wife (book) - Henry has no agency and no free will because he time travels randomly to different parts of his life and therefore knows everything that happens before it happens, and can't change any of it.

Looper (movie) - When people time travel to the past and try to change their lives, their memories change in the present as the timeline of their lives change.

#15x20 #destiel #destiel coda #15x20 coda #s15 #destiel ficlets #tf #my coda #my canon fics #listen i had to get this idea on paper i am sorry lol

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datawyrms · 3 years

Text

Happy DannyMay everyone! i say while dropping this. For day one, Memories. sorta kinda sequel to this Half a Decade Late

He said he’d never hate them. Back when he thought it would only be a matter of time until he found a weakness, a flaw and squirmed free. He always had before. He didn’t like being captured, and he certainly didn’t like getting shoved into cages, but it was always temporary. A terrifying inconvenience. Something he’d shrug off eventually and forget. Lately he was starting to realize he’d forget that he ever considered thinking charitably. Just like all the other things he couldn’t quite remember.

They took everything. His freedom, his limbs, his skin, his voice. So many things he had the misfortune of learning he could recover from with enough time. Really broke the idea that anything about you was special. Did it matter that they ripped him open when the green slime he was made of would eventually cover the hole without even a sign of the pain it caused him? He just stopped caring. Ghosts didn’t feel pain. Maybe if he believed that enough, he wouldn’t need to feel it. Hurt was just a matter of perspective.

He was changing, apparently. The spectral copies of his human organs they stole over and over again stopped being perfect copies. Sloppy. Apparently his body was forgetting what the real ones were like. He didn’t remember the last time he’d been human anyway. That was fine. It was the only real way he could bother them now, being ‘less useful’. Obviously he didn’t need them that badly. He envied some of his fellow prisoners. They were just green inside. Nothing the vultures wanted, nothing for them to mutter and prod at while he struggled uselessly.

He didn’t really know why he still bothered to do that. It never worked. Some impulse. Just better than keeping still. He never really was a human, was he? Humans didn’t treat other humans like this. So he wasn’t one. So why did he ever think he was?

Tie was weird. Maybe having a soul made you act all funny. He’d been tempted to change her name, to no-mask or just face, but the words didn’t feel right, sort of caught on his tongue. Even when he didn’t have one sometimes! Tie just slid off easily. Like he’d said it a lot, or something like it.

So the newbie remained Tie. And Tie was weird. A good kind of weird? She didn’t just tell him to shut up, anyway. Most of them were boring like that. Though not getting shocked into unconsciousness did make the days tend to drag a bit more. She did make his head hurt sometimes, with all the weird reactions Tie made. It always passed though.

He kept playing with the lights up there so they would flicker and crackle, just to check if it was a Tie day. Sure, that got a good amount of shocks when it wasn’t Tie, but they were always grumpy after he’d lost a limb or two. It was almost amusing again. That was the word. Maybe?

“You don’t remember Amity at all?”

Frustration and anger that was directed at him, but also not. Tie was super strange like that. “Why would I?” His response just made her eyes narrow more, but she didn’t do anything to take it out on him. It was hilarious.

“That’s where you’re from.”

“News to me.” Might be a lie, might not. Gun grunts said lots of weird stuff. He shifted position, watching her while upside down didn’t make it easier to tell if humans were lying or not, but did make her scowling funnier. “That’s where you’re from then? Or that other name you keep using.”

“You can’t actually be him. Fuck.” She was rubbing at her forehead, looking away at nothing. “You remember ghost hunters but not Amity Park?”

“Hey! Names are hard, Tie. Isn’t like you know the name of every town you’ve ever been in.”

“No, but I remember the one I lived in most of my life!”

“Good for you! I’d clap but I’m kinda under armed for the task.” Under armed. He snickered as she only rolled her eyes at his joke, but it only made him think of another one. “Isn’t like a ghost lives anywhere.”

“You’re in here for hell knows how long and you can’t get better jokes?!”

Tie’s irritation just made it funnier. “These are gold! Way better than the stuff you guys laugh at.”

“Like what?”

“Oh you know.” The humour of the moment passed as he got back up, wondering if he should give the old ice trick another go. The noises were fun. “Like how the ghost won’t eat, but ghosts don’t breathe either. So the ghost can’t do much to stop ya.” As if Tie didn’t know. She still made the weird pinched expressions though. Why bother? It didn’t really matter if she actually had a soul still. Those ones just quit and then there’d be a new newbie. “Lots of you think that’s reaaaaal funny.” He stuck out his tongue, gagging. “Gross gun grunts.”

“That’s not funny either.”

“Try breaking your funny bone a few times. That’ll fix it. Or was that computers?” He frowned, rubbing his fingers against his chin. Computers. What was it about computers again? Re-re-something? Like with bones when you...did something…

“Phantom!”

That jerked him out of his considerations. “Still not him!” Now that he checked, Tie looked like she’d been trying to get his attention for awhile again. That, or she’d figured out how to teleport closer to his cage. Both were very possible. Probably.

“You didn’t hear a word I said, did you.”

“You were talking?”

“For someone who says he isn’t Phantom, it sure gets your attention fast.”

He shrugged. What did Tie expect? So what if he noticed it? It didn’t mean anything to him, personally. It was like comp-whatevers. “You could say the coats were coming and I’d do the same thing.”

“Doubt it. You remember Jack and Maddie maybe?” Tie hesitated, as if saying something to him actually mattered. “Your parents?”

“I’m a ghost. And possibly a starfish. Since I do the whole regenerating thing.” He’s pretty sure it’s starfish that do that. “I don’t think they’re big on families.” He thought that was pretty amusing, having like. Little voiceless things that cling to rocks as parents. Actually had a bit in common if you thought of his cage as a rock? Tie didn’t agree, based on how he was biting at her lip and clenching her fists. Still no shooting. Still super weird.

“Be a mercy killing at this point…” Tie wasn’t actually speaking to him, but it was interesting. Killing what? One of the other ghosts maybe. “Sam, Tucker? Any of them ring a bell?”

He certainly didn’t have a bell in here. “Sam...and Tucker are names?” He guessed, shuddering a little. Weird names. Made the gooey mess of ectoplasm he was made of wriggle when he said it. Like when he was struggling to digest something, uncomfortable and heavy and just making him want to move when he couldn’t. Though he could this time. Zipping up to the top of his cage helped shake the feeling off, at least. He wasn’t saying those again, no thank you. “You have weird tricks, Tie”

“They’re just names. I didn’t do anything to make you fly up there. I half thought you couldn’t do that anymore.”

Tie did have a bit of a point. When was the last time he’d flown up here? “Think I forgot I could?” He didn’t really move much in general. Not like he had anywhere to go, his cage didn’t really change.

She just looked tired. “This isn’t fixable.”

He wasn’t really paying attention, poking at the edges of his cage with his feet was pretty entertaining. It tingled a bit when he got pushed back, but flipping over in the air was easy. Why didn’t he float more? “Gun grunts don’t fix things, so Idonno why you care.”

Tie wasn’t paying much attention to him either, muttering to herself. “Manson would kill me for doing it. No way she’d believe you’re like this. Let alone the Fentons...”

Well, that was boring. He busied himself with counting how many seconds it took for the shock to stop coursing through him when he touched the walls. Though it was a bit tricky to keep track between tries.

“Skulker? Ember? You at least remember the ghosts, don’t you?”

“Are you just making names up now Tie?” They just sounded silly. The thought of someone named ‘Skulker’...who was also very tiny. Now that’d be funny. Kinda liked that idea actually.

“Probably don’t even remember the guy who put a million on your head…”

“A million whats? Questions? That’s more a you thing, Tie.”

“No, Vlad. The mayor?”

“The what?” Things weren’t funny anymore. He wasn’t cool and passive. That word, there’d been others but he didn’t even care what they’d been. The V had been enough to set his core to a furious pulsating heat of fury. His ice claws clung to the wall even as the buzzing in his skull grew stronger as the field tried to shove him back. “WHERE” He snared, not caring how his throat burned from the partial wail trying to scrabble out of his throat. Tie didn’t matter, nothing mattered and he actually missed his arm since not having it made it harder to keep his grip and snarl at the one backing away from his prison. “WHERE IS HE?” Oh he’d order anyone, and they’d listen or he’d shred them as soon as he got through- but his claws were cracking- green and red staining and corrupting the fine edge he’d honed so often. Why did he care? He didn’t know, didn’t want to know, he just had to act and now, just in case. The chance might slip away and he wouldn’t, they’d pay they’d pay, they’d PAY.

“Danny! Stop hurting yourself, he’s not here!” Tie was blathering, but at least backed away when he shrieked at her. Stupid Tie. Didn’t know anything. “Hell. You don’t even know why you’re mad, do you.”

He kept slamming the ice back in place, even as his arm weakened and started oozing. He didn’t need his legs, he didn’t need arms, he didn’t need anything. Just OUT. NOW. He snarled and snapped at the metal that grabbed his back and slammed him hard to the ground of his cage. It ignored him and the awful warmth that had consumed everything. He never won against it but now he had to keep trying because-because the anger? Because of something. The metal easily ignored the green surging pulses of electricity, just kept pressing down on him until he wasn’t solid enough to struggle, not strong enough to scream at it. The awful stabbing feeling in his core wanted him to act, but he couldn’t even defiantly flick his tail as he grew colder and slipped out of consciousness.

Everything hurt and it wasn’t even Friday. At least. He didn’t think it was? He’d have to ask Tie about it...if Tie showed up again. Something about her gave him a stab of unease. Might have something to do with all the green stains in here. Didn’t remember getting shot though. Strange. Must have done something. Maybe. Didn’t really matter.

#Danny Phantom #Dannymay2021 #dannymay #valerie gray #many terrible implications #i couldn't help it i had more pondering #vals no good day mark 2 #now to endlessly not decide if i should make a compilation on ao3 #or just stick things to the ends of the phic phight stuff i'm doing

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