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thesolferino · 3 years

Text

Favor

⤷ dream x f!reader.

⤷ genre: angst, fluff

⤷ word count: 8.4k

⤷ requested: yes, by this lovely anon!

— summary: dream asks you to pretend to be his girlfriend for a day. things only seem to go downhill from there.

It started as a favor.

On a quiet night in your apartment when you stared at your phone for way longer than your eyes could physically take and rolled around on the bed, talking to one of your best internet friends, Dream, he asked you for a favor. His voice was muffled through the mic on his phone, the one connected to his computer way cleaner, but neither of you could bother getting off FaceTime and call on Discord instead - yet you still heard him loud and clear, because you burst out laughing right after.

“What the hell did you just say?” you laughed, turning on your stomach and opening the call, now entirely focused on the timer that counted every second you spent talking to him instead of your Twitter timeline.

“It’s embarrassing, don’t make me repeat it!” And for that sole reason, you wanted him to repeat it, loud and clear.

“Is this why you were so insistent on me coming down to Florida? So I could pretend to be your girlfriend at your cousin’s wedding so your family doesn’t think you’re a loser?” you laughed, finding the situation entirely absurd as he sputtered, words mashing together, trying to defend himself.

“No! No, I wanted you to come here because we’re friends and I-I wanna meet you, this is just a… benefit, of sorts.” he replied, and you couldn’t help but laugh even harder at his poor attempt of trying to save face.

“Alright, I’ll bite.” you chuckle. “What’s in it for me?”

“Whatever you want.” he responded, much too quick. Your eyebrows raised.

“Whatever I want?” you parroted.

“Yes.” he confirmed. “I’ll buy you something, if you want; I’ll even pay you-”

“Pay me?! I’m not a whore, Dream!”

“That is not AT ALL what I was saying!” he cut in, yelling as you burst into a new fit of laughter. “It’s just… I sort of already told them I have a girlfriend and I was just hoping you’d say yes ‘cause it’s gonna be very awkward if I show up without the girlfriend in question.”

You put your head in your hands and he sort of dryly laughed at himself when he heard your palm hit your forehead. “What is wrong with you, man?”

“Listen, it’s not gonna be so bad! Just stay by my side for a bit, look pretty, we’ll get some drinks, and then dip. That’s it, I promise.” he reasoned.

“And here I thought we were gonna make out in front of everyone. What’s a fake relationship if we don’t make a show out of it?” you sarcastically snickered, and could practically see his eyeroll from miles away.

“If that’s what you want, then we’ll do it, by all means.” he replied and you laughed, shaking your head in mild disbelief.

“Alright, well, if you already told them, I don’t have much of a choice, do I?” you huffed, pretending to be way more bummed out about it than you really were. “I’ll do it.”

“Thank you so much, oh my God.” he replied and you chuckled at the sheer relief in his voice.

A few seconds of silence pass. “What’s the catch?”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“How do you want me to publicly embarrass myself in exchange for this favor?”

“Personally, I think that forcing you to tweet that tweet about pissing yourself in bed again and also tweeting that everyone should subscribe to me isn’t “publicly embarrassing” at all.”

“Maybe I should’ve picked a different fake girlfriend.”

“Sucks to suck, pissbaby.”

The weeks leading up to your meetup felt like years, with every treacherous minute of you two talking over muffled mics and shitty webcams feeling longer than it should, your empty apartment feeling emptier and emptier by the day. Was it even possible to miss a person you hadn’t even met yet?

It turns out that it very much was, because as soon as the painfully long weeks were up and you were finally metres away from him, you jumped in his arms like a woman finally seeing her soldier husband after the war, standing on your tiptoes while he bent down the best he could to hug you back. His chest rumbled with a warm laugh when you turned your head ever so slightly towards his ear.

“Hello, boyfriend.” And just like that, the warm turned into a groan of faux annoyance while you burst into laughter and he pulled away, scanning your face with an equally annoyed look.

“I should’ve never asked you for that. You’re never letting it go, are you?” Yeah, you were kind of annoying with the amount of corny boyfriend jokes you threw his way - you had to give him that. But then again, he crafted his own fate and now he must accept the consequences.

“Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t realise your majesty wasn’t appreciating the work I’m doing! I just won’t show up at that wedding, how about that?” you bit back, voice dripping with sarcasm.

“You’re such an idiot.” he laughed. “Give me those bags.”

A blissful week had passed, and he hadn’t pissed you off in real life nearly as much as you thought he would. It took a bit of getting used to to his family calling him Clay instead of his beloved internet username, and you did get a couple of suggestive looks from his mother the first few times she visited - you had a couple of “eye conversations” in which she never exactly asked if you were his girlfriend, and you never exactly denied it, but you knew both of you felt the weight of the unspoken words yet you had to keep everything secret and ambiguous. Or at least you thought you did, before he revealed to you that he told his mom the two of you were dating already. Seems like the glances were knowing and not questioning. Maybe you weren’t as good at eye conversation as previously thought.

Living with him was fine, mostly because he had godly air conditioning and a house that was probably way too big for him, and also a very cute cat that followed you everywhere and made living with a man for a full two weeks way more bearable. Finding out that he can’t cook was one of the most bizarre revelations about him that you’d had in the years of your friendship, and you demanded he watched as you made chicken wraps. You complained about how he was 21 and couldn’t cook for himself, he complained about how it’s 2021 and he can just order from Chipotle or something, dude.

A week of goofing around and trying to hide the fact the two of you temporarily lived together from the internet had passed quicker than it should’ve, and for the first time in seven days, Netflix was turned off and the two of you were dressing up for the wedding, ready to set off with his parents and younger sister. He spent ages trying to convince you to match with him, which was quite literally impossible because he wore a black suit and you brought a red dress, which resulted in the two of you roaming around a local mall at 10 am, half asleep, looking for a reasonably formal black dress, because of course Dream always got his way.

An hour of arguing and your fashion tastes clashing later, you picked an off shoulder black dress with a high slit, along with a pair of pumps, both of which you forced him to pay for, and went back home, ready to glam both of you up as much as humanly possible because you were not ready to let him show up in some horrendous pair of shoes and claim to be your boyfriend.

“Is this okay?” you questioned, turning from the mirror to face him and let him be the judge of your shimmery black and white eyelids, spending way too much time on a makeup look for a wedding of someone whose name you didn’t even know. He blinked at you as his judging gaze washed over you like a wave, scanning you up and down while you nervously cocked your head, leg tapping in faux impatient annoyance to cover up the fact that you felt like prey under his eyes.

“It’s… yeah, it is. You look good.” Dream confirmed, nodding his head at you in a movement that was way too quick and snappy and you turn back to the mirror with a huff, watching him stare right back at you.

“Too much, right? I should try something else.” You say, grabbing your makeup remover wipes, but he cuts in before you can even wipe a single smudge.

“No, no, it looks good, I promise. Really good. Don’t touch it.” Something way too sincere in his voice makes the air tense, more tense than usual, but you drop it, deciding to just take the compliment with a tight lipped smile.

“Okay. You ready?” you ask, and he nods, nervously straightening out his suit before looking back at you with an anxious grin.

“Yeah, I think so. Do I look fine?”

He did. He looked more than fine. You’d never seen him actually dress up for something and put proper care into his looks - he was practically forced into doing it by you this time as well - so seeing him in an actual black suit, all formal and expensive looking, messy dirty blond hair properly combed for the first time in ages, made you gulp and look away. You sort of never understood the argument that women and men can’t be friends because you were never attracted to one of your male friends, ever. Dream was born to be an exception to every rule, it seemed.

Realising that you abruptly looked away, you attempted to awkwardly clear your throat and smile at him.

“Yeah, you do. Let’s go.”

During the ride there, his mother seemed to finally explode and the words that have clearly wanted to pour out of her mouth for ages finally came out. You supposed it was better for the poor woman, and did your best to suppress a laugh when Dream dramatically sighed and leaned against the window when she nosily spoke up.

“So… since when have you and Clay been together? He’s told us absolutely nothing!” She spoke up from the passenger seat, shifting to look at you, excited smile plastered on her face and you politely smiled back, mentally noting that you’d have to bully the shit out of him for acting like his mom is embarrassing him in front of his 8th grade crush.

“Ah, we’ve been friends for a long while, but we only started dating a month or so ago, because it’s hard doing long distance and all that.” you said, hoping it would sound believable enough because the two of you rehearsed this a few days ago, writing out a whole backstory from how you started dating to what exact words he used when he asked you out. There were a couple of arguments here and there, such as the fact you refused to say you confessed you’ve been in love with him for years and he refused to say he admitted he’s been your “bottom bitch” for 3 years but in the end, you somehow managed to agree on a cohesive timeline of events.

“Oh, does that mean you’re going to move here?” she questioned, and that one didn’t surprise you either, Dream having prepared a full list of answers to questions that people might ask in your notes app. He was a perfectionist to the point it got on your nerves, but that had its own perks.

“No, but I’ll definitely visit more often, and if it goes well, I might as well move here.” you smiled back at her and she nodded, going back to staring through the windshield. You and Dream exchange a relieved glance that you hope his younger sister doesn’t notice.

“Let me tell you, I was waiting for you two to get together! He always talked about you, I was getting tired of him, you know that?” she giggled and you widened your eyes at Dream who, snapping out of somewhat of a daze, immediately jumped to protest, light blush adorning his pale cheeks.

“No, I didn’t! I did not, mom, don’t lie to her.” he argued while all she did was laugh.

“Oh come on, it’s not embarrassing now that you’re together!” she kept going, and his younger sister joined in, to make it even worse.

“Yeah, you do talk about her a lot, not gonna lie.” she spoke up and his cold glare directed her way told you everything you needed to know, hanging on by a thread not to burst out laughing. He refused to even look your way, turning back to the window as his cheeks started heating up. You couldn’t help but let out at least a bit of a giggle, placing your hand on his arm in fake comfort.

“It’s okay, you can admit it now.” your tone borderlined on mocking and he knew you’d make fun of him for days to come so he stayed silent while the rest of the car burst into laughter.

The wedding was truly beautifully set up, set in a hotel wedding venue, walls painted in pure innocent white with hints of gold here and there, and you nudged Dream as the two of you observed in awe, asking what sort of money the groom had to be able to afford this sort of expensive venue. Nudging him proved to be way easier now, because you linked arms - you originally made fun of him for suggesting to walk like that instead of holding hands like normal people, telling him you’d look like you were at your high school prom, but he persisted, and you didn’t end up looking as goofy as you thought.

“He’s a doctor or something, pretty sure.” he replied, quick feet trudging down the long hallways, your own struggling to keep up with him, especially in your heels. He seemed to be in a rush to sit and get it over with as soon as possible so he could avoid any nosy family members, but bad luck followed him everywhere, it seems, because as soon as you two entered the place where the bride and groom would unite, at least three different pairs of eyes locked on you, and you immediately saw a fairly elderly woman get up with open arms, staring at Dream with a grin on her face. You saw him immediately tense up, and almost laughed right then and there.

“There’s my boy! Oh, you’ve grown so much, come here!” The woman looked to be in her fifties and Dream let go of your arm to nervously laugh and fall into her hug, the two rocking from side to side as she kept going on about how it seemed that he grew taller and taller every time she saw him.

When the two pulled away, her eyes fixed on you, judgingly scanning from head to toe and you suddenly realised why Dream tensed up the way he did - old white women sure had a way to make you anxious. Thankfully, he stepped in.

“Aunt Bessie, this is Y/N, my girlfriend. Y/N, this is aunt Bessie, my mom’s older sister.” he generously offered the explanation you were so obviously lacking and you grinned, as if that information helped you in any way, and stuck out your hand in an offer of a handshake. However, she seemed to have different plans, because as soon as she heard the words “my girlfriend” her face lit up as if she won the lottery and her lips stretched into a smile, opening her arms for you the same way she did for him.

“Oh my God, you finally got a girlfriend? Come here!” she said, shaking her head at your outstretched hand and gesturing you to return the hug which you quite hesitantly did, politely laughing as she hugged you tighter than you’d deem appropriate. Dream came from a family of huggers - that much was apparent from him, you guess, but you weren’t exactly prepared for this.

Aunt Bessie seemed to be way louder and screechier than expected, because the word “girlfriend” boomed through the room and off the snowy walls, and at least five other family members of his turned around to check who the lucky fellow that finally got a girlfriend was. Another one of his aunts seemed to notice the commotion and suddenly, another older woman with shoulder length, dyed blonde hair, along with her two younger kids, was hurling at you as well.

“I always complained to him that it was about time he got a girlfriend! He’s a fine young man, no wonder you picked him, honey.” Aunt Bessie shot you a knowing look and you closed your mouth in a tight lipped smile in a feverish attempt to keep down the laugh that threatened to escape you.

“Oh yeah, he definitely is.” you giggled, looking up at Dream again who looked like he wanted the earth below his feet to open and swallow him whole. Before you could nudge him in the ribs and tease him for hours to come, the other aunt suddenly spoke up.

“Clay! Oh my gosh, is that you?” she exclaimed, shocked grin on her face, and you briefly wondered if Dream ever even visited his family. He nervously smiled, obviously not really sure who this woman even is, but he hugged her back anyway, clearly walking the line between ‘happy to see his family’ and ‘insanely uncomfortable’.

“I haven’t seen you in so long, your dad hasn’t visited since we moved to Toronto! Look at how tall you are, you’re taller than my husband now! You used to be so tiny, whatever happened to you?” Upon hearing the word Toronto he seemed to realise who he was talking to as his eyes softened, and you wondered if he really was so expressive or you could just read him that well.

“I grew up, I guess.” He awkwardly laughed and she laughed harder than she should’ve before turning to you.

“Oh, and who is this?” She said, gaze periodically switching between him and you, a knowing smile on her face which told you she definitely knew who you were.

“Ah, this is my girlfriend, Y/N. Y/N, this is… my dad’s cousin, Mabel.” He introduced, large hand landing on your back, and you felt like you were experiencing déjà vu at the way her face lit up at the mention of a girlfriend.

“Wow, it’s so nice to meet you, Y/N!” She said, energetically shaking your hand, before turning back to Dream. “You never told us you got a girlfriend! You’re finally planning on settling down, huh?”

Your head snapped in his direction at the speed of light when she mentioned settling down, and you could see him tense up as well as he nervously laughed.

“Yeah, we haven’t visited in a while, so nobody from the family really knew. And, uh… we haven’t really thought of that yet, we’re taking it slow and everything.” He said and you were almost in awe at how good he was at bullshitting. The woman did nothing but laugh.

“Ah, don’t lie to me, I see the way you two look at each other! It’s your wedding we’ll be attending next!” She winked, and just as Dream got ready to fake laugh once again, her family called her over and she excused herself, walking off.

The two of you hurried to your seats as well, sitting down next to his younger sister.

“Your family is insane, man, holy shit.” You laughed in disbelief, staring at him as he shook his head, clearly as distressed as you were.

“Literally nobody in this family gives a single fuck if I’m single or not except the old aunties. And I seem to have a shit ton of those.” He muttered under his breath. “The way you look at each other - I literally didn’t even look at you properly that whole time!”

You cackled at that one, hitting his arm. “She’s right, Clay. You’re one fine young man, eh?” You nudged him as he groaned in embarrassment, only turning your way to glare at you.

You didn’t get to tease him for much longer, though, because the organ started playing and the bridesmaids and groomsmen lined up, the groom standing at his designated place. The bride walked in, arms locked with her father, thin white veil covering her face as she walked down the aisle, looking angelic in her puffy wedding gown. Silky brown hair fell down her shoulders, curled towards the ends, and you could see the hint of blood red lipstick beneath the veil. She looked beautiful - the groom seemed to think so as well, because you could see him tapping the corner of his eye lightly, wiping any stray tears.

She finally made it to the end and stepped to face her soon-to-be husband as her father moved away, sitting back in his chair. The wedding officiant stepped up, and held a speech much longer than it should be, which just led you to zone out.

One day you’d be beneath that veil, wouldn’t you? One day, you’ll face your fiancé the same way she is, and you’ll let your hearts link with a string that nobody but the two of you could snap. Who would that be, though? Who could you even trust with your heart in their hands? And you’re not aware of how and why and when, but your eyes shot up at Dream, whose eyes also glinted in that way where you knew he wasn’t paying attention, and maybe he was thinking about the same thing as you. Maybe one day, you’ll be attending his wedding, forcing one of your friends to play a fake boyfriend as he wipes his tears, waiting for his bride to get to him.

It was disheartening, the thought of being a bystander while he locks lips with somebody else. You supposed you just liked being the center of attention, so you let yourself pretend you were his bride in your daydreams. Separating daydreams from rational thoughts was mandatory, because you weren’t sure how you’d explain to yourself that you can’t stand seeing Dream marry someone else.

Dream, the infamous hopeless romantic, still seemed out of it, maybe even a little emotional, despite not being that close with either of the two. He was probably thinking about his own wedding as well, thinking about his future, the face he’d see when he pulled back the veil.

Just then, his eyes darted to yours, and you realised you were caught staring, snapping your head back to the couple that started reading their vows by now. You started going red from the neck up, cheeks on fire as you could feel his gaze burning into you. He turned back after a few seconds, though, probably assuming you stared at him because you were bored, and neither of you spoke, even though you kind of wish you did. What even is there to say, though?

By the time you snapped back, the “I do”s were already being said, and her veil was getting lifted, showing her beauty to everyone present, and as they kissed the whole room bursted into cheers and applause in support of the newlyweds. The two exit, teary eyed, their parents follow close behind, and that’s when Dream’s family rushes both of you to your feet, following the two into the reception hall where the actual party would take place.

From then on, the wedding is the same as any other. The two have their first dance, they give a welcoming speech, and Dream lets you stuff your face with cake and repeatedly refills your wine glass as repayment for dragging you into this whole thing. At some point, he stretches his hand out to you and asks for a dance like a rom-com main character, and you’re not sure exactly why he did that because he’s mostly terrible at dancing, but you had fun letting him twirl you until you got dizzy anyway.

You also realised just how much he did actually need a fake girlfriend, because it seemed like every twenty minutes some sort of relative of his would walk up to the two of you and congratulate him on “finally getting a girlfriend”. You ended up bullying him for that as well, wondering just how long he’s been single for if they’re all this surprised that he’s got a girlfriend, to which he just downed the glass of water he’d been sipping for half an hour and asked you about the weather.

His family took a few pictures with the new couple - you even got to speak to the bride at some point, congratulating her and wishing the two of them well, but in the span of a few hours, the wedding was over and the newlyweds made a great exit, signifying the end of the party. The two of you were driven home by his parents, and you waved them goodbye as you stumbled to the front door, your heels insanely uncomfortable and the red wine in your stomach weighing down on you; you just wanted to get out of this dress and into a pair of pajamas and pass out on his couch in the living room.

That’s sort of exactly what you did - you half-assed taking your makeup off, wiping down your face a couple of times, deciding that was enough before changing into some worn pajamas and plopping down on the couch next to Dream who already claimed his place and sunk into the cushion while a random movie played on the TV. The two of you basked in the comfortable silence that surrounded you, the exhausted, tired type. You both appreciated the quiet and fell asleep sitting next to each other, wedding already forgotten.

That night, he went from Dream to Clay.

The departure was bittersweet. You left two days after that, your hug at the airport tight, warm, filled with a sugary sweet feeling you couldn’t quite place and sour acid that ate away at you because you didn’t want to leave in the slightest. His arms were warm, inviting, whispering for you to stay but you left anyway, waving him goodbye, setting off to home.

It seemed like all your problems came and went with him, because a week later, at 3 in the morning while you were up editing a video, you got an all caps message on your Discord from Sapnap.

“YOU’RE DATING DREAM?”

You blinked at your computer screen, white letters blinding you in the dark, brain trying to keep up with why he even thought that. Within 10 seconds, another message, this time from Dream.

“so i told george and sapnap that we’re dating”

“don’t kill me pls”

Yeah, you weren’t going to kill him, per se, but he definitely made your life a lot harder than it should be. You opened Discord, Premiere Pro and the unedited video abandoned, typing back to Clay quickly.

“WHY”

He responded immediately, as one panicked man does.

“they’ve been making fun of me for being single for ages now :(“

“we already did this fake dating thing before and it went perfectly fine”

“just play along for a month or so”

“pls”

You audibly sighed. And as if he could hear you, he started typing again.

“i’ll promote you on my channel more”

“just pls do it”

“you love me, right”

Another sigh fell from your lips before you could stop it. Of course you did, because if you didn’t, there’s no way you would be playing into this. You typed back.

“fine”

He messaged back immediately.

“THANK YOU”

“LOVE YOU <333”

With a shake of your head, you mumbled “idiot” with the ghost of a smile flashing on your face, switching back to your video, opting to ignore Sapnap for a little bit. He could wait.

Fake dating seemed pretty damn easy during the first week - you thought you were killing it by sending corny tweets and staged selfies so he could screenshot them and send them to the groupchat, giggling on call about how oblivious they are and how you’re fooling them so good, both of you opting to ignore the parts where they claimed they knew the two of you were gonna get together eventually. It was fun, lighthearted, and an excuse to flirt with someone you had nothing official with.

As much as all your problems came and went with Clay, though, they came and went with his friends as well, especially that hopeless man Clay called his best friend.

Because yeah, of course Sapnap was the one to accidentally spill to the public that the two of you were “dating”.

George was streaming at what was apparently a normal time in the UK, not so much for Florida, and Clay was sleeping while you were watching his stream while making some food for yourself. It was going fine, a bit of a chill stream, and you leaned against the fridge as your oven preheated, tired eyes following his Minecraft skin.

“Sophie, thank you for the dono! ‘Hey George, I love your videos, just wanted to ask if you were speedrunning with Dream today?’” he read out, and you could faintly hear Sapnap join the stream through your headphones.

“No I’m not, Dream’s… I don’t know what Dream’s doing right now, actually. He’s not responding to me, though. Probably talking to his girlfriend still.” he continued, exaggerating the last part mockingly, still playing into the whiny role of being upset that Clay was ditching the two of them for you. That majorly woke you up, though, as you stood straight on your feet immediately, because oh no, nobody was supposed to know.

You exited out of the Twitch app quickly, letting the stream play in the background as you tried to fish for Sapnap’s profile on Discord and text him as quick as possible, trying to warn him to not let anybody know, but before you could do it, you heard his laughter clear in the stream.

“Yeah, Y/N, his sweetie poo.” Sapnap said, causing George to laugh even louder, before moving onto the next topic, and your heartbeat picked up an insane amount, nails loud and probably damaging your phone screen as you typed as quickly as humanly possible to yell at him because this was not planned, at all.

You heard him go quiet after you shot him a couple of messages over Discord (“SAPNAP” “ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID” “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU” “NOBODY KNOWS YET” “IM GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU”), type something to George who then fell quiet as well for a few seconds, pure horror on his face, and then went back to streaming as if nothing happened while Sapnap profusely apologised to you on his and George’s behalf.

No apology could fix what had already been done, though, and you were left alone with the warzone that was Twitter who had already speculated the two of you were dating long before while Clay peacefully slept somewhere in his house at 4 am in Florida. You bombarded him with messages and waited until he woke up ‘cause what were you even supposed to do?!

You chose to spend your time finishing the pizza you were originally supposed to make and almost burnt your whole apartment down because you forgot the oven was on for a whole hour while yelling at Clay’s idiotic best friends. You yelled at Sapnap, who kept apologising to you, you yelled at George, who yelled back that it’s not that big of a deal because people were bound to find out anyways, and you yelled at Clay, because he was the guilty one somehow for not being awake during your breakdown.

He did eventually wake up though, to the shitshow that were his notifications with at least thirty messages from each of you, messages from his other YouTube friends who were fairly surprised, and his entire fanbase going ham on Twitter. He was surprisingly calm about it - calmer than you were, anyways, and sheepishly said over the phone that the fake dating thing may have to go on for a little longer since you couldn’t just date for a month and then break up, and you were sort of okay with that.

And of course, the business side of him awoke at that moment, and he giddily told you about the amount of views the two of you could pull if you did the same shit you do with George and Sapnap anyway, but on livestream.

You rolled your eyes.

And then agreed anyway.

And so, the charade began.

His Twitter statement was up shortly, telling the people that you’d been dating for a couple of weeks and weren’t planning to tell anybody yet until a certain someone spilled their guts live, and the fact Dream was dating someone, let alone another popular streamer, took the internet by storm. You expected hate, and you got quite a bit of that, but the people that had shipped the two of you before were certainly more than delighted and a lot of Clay’s fans were supportive.

Now, both of you had excuses to do chill streams together and just hang out and you took the opportunity and ran with it.

You’d sit and play Geoguessr or just try and speedrun Minecraft a bunch of times for hours on end, doing stupid bits and things you’d be doing offline anyways, with a little more flirting than usual, because that’s what made it interesting.

“Oh this is France, for sure.” you claimed one night, two or three weeks after the secret was officially out, chewing on the fries you bought for this specific occasion, streaming on his alt to a few thousand people.

“You think so? It could be Belgium, too.” he responded, humming in thought as he looked around.

“I know so.” you responded.

“How?”

“I just do. Gamer intuition, babe.” you said, and he wheezed at your response, repeating the words gamer intuition under his breath.

“No, seriously. It is France, I know it is, I’ve seen so many pictures of that place I know it like the back of my hand now. That’s Lyon, or something.” you continued, plopping another french fry into your mouth.

“You have? Why do you know so much about France, that’s so random.” he responded, opening the map and pointing to France, although he keeps looking around, unsure of his decision.

“I dunno, I like it there. I wish I could move there.” you replied.

“Why, though?”

“It’s pretty and heavily romanticised! Just like me!” you joked and he laughed, before letting you continue. “I dunno, it’s the city of love. Be a little romantic.”

“The… the city of love is whatever city the two of us are in.” he said, and it took a few seconds for you to process the joke before letting out a fake disappointed sigh.

“I can’t believe I’m dating someone as corny as you.”

At that, he bursts into wheezes, and you follow along, enjoying the sound of his laughter coursing through your headphones more than you used to a few weeks back. It feels nice, feels right, acting like this. You like calling him your boyfriend more than you think you should.

A few weeks go by, and it feels all too natural. It feels too natural, talking to him first thing in the morning when you’ve barely even had your coffee, calling him pet names, throwing sweet words at each other publicly like they mean nothing. It feels all too natural, and nice, and all too right, and you don’t even notice when the two of you cross the line between public and private, and you’re stuck making stupid jokes about making out when you first see each other when there’s nobody to witness them except the walls of your rooms, but you don’t like thinking about that, because you know it’ll bring nothing but confusion. The current this that the two of you have is perfect to you, perfectly lighthearted and funny and fun, and you intend on keeping it that way, refusing to think about it in any way past jokes.

That is, until you can’t anymore.

It’s late, again, and you’re staring at his contact name on your phone screen, lazily lying on the bed. It reminds you of a night from roughly 3 months ago, when your whole friendship seemed to change in the few seconds it took you to process what he’d asked of you, and it feels weird, but nice.

“My mom really likes you, you know?” Clay breaks the quiet that you’ve learned to appreciate in his presence, and you exhale through your nose, the noise just short of a chuckle.

“Yeah?” You laugh, and he does as well.

“Yeah.” He reaffirms. “She thinks you’re a great girlfriend. Apparently I seem brighter ever since we got together.”

You laugh again. “I am a great girlfriend, to be fair. She’s totally right.”

“Well, I wouldn’t know that. If you’re as good of a girlfriend as you pretend to be, though, then you’re amazing.” He says, and words fly out of your mouth before you can stop them.

“Yeah? You wanna find out?” The flirty nature is nothing strange to the two of you, but this time it feels kinda different, it feels like you’re stepping into dangerous territory that there’s no coming back from. You feel like you’ve ruined everything, for some reason.

He laughs, like normal, though. He laughs like nothing happened at all, and you’re so, so grateful for that.

“Sure, let’s do it. You’re about to unpack the full Clay boyfriend experience.” He snickers and you laugh as well.

“That means I just unlock the dick as well as the personality.” you respond, quick as always, and the wheeze that escapes him is so loud that it makes you laugh too.

“...Unlock the dick…” he repeats through another wheeze and you nod, laughing.

“Yeah! I mean I’m literally experiencing the boyfriend experience without actually having a boyfriend, it’s fuckin’ great.” you say and he hums.

“You could have one, though.”

The implications are crazy, his words are crazy, he’s crazy and everything that he could mean and couldn’t mean by that is driving you crazy too, brain faltering and heart seeming way too big for your chest to contain it. It’s silent.

“I could, I guess.”

You choose to say, and he switches the topic naturally, like he never said anything.

Things are never the same again.

It’s not in a bad way. Sure, it is kind of a bad way for the feelings you’re trying to push down inside you, a bad way for hot nights when the unbearable heat forces you to stay up even when you don’t want to and you have no choice but to think about why you feel the way you feel as you melt into the burning sheets below you, a bad way for when he jokes about finding somebody else and you feel your stomach churning. A bad way for realising that this fake dating thing is really getting to you, but not a bad way in general.

Maybe it’s in a good way. Maybe the underlying implications whenever he makes jokes about making the relationship real are good, maybe the way he calls you in the middle of the night when he’s anxious and freaking out and defends himself by saying: “You’re my girlfriend, you’re always there for me, I just figured I could call you.” and you end up wondering if it’s possible to say jokes in such a vulnerable state or if he’s serious is good, maybe the way it’s been a few months and he won’t tell his own best friends that it was a joke the whole time is good, maybe the way you confronted him about it and he said he likes having you as his girlfriend is good.

Maybe the way the two of you are always walking the line between joking and being serious, between being friends and something more, between lies and pranks and emotional investment and fear of committing, and the way you’re always trying to push the other off, is good.

The fans love it. The fanart is incredible (serves especially well for those hot nights when you can’t fall asleep and you scroll, watching yourself fall in love with Clay in every universe, tales told by people who observe your story and find it worthy enough to retell in their own words, to take the love you pretend to have and turn it into something real), people love to gush over the compliments he sprinkles in at random times during conversation and the general flirty dynamic is loved by many, pulling in more views and attraction for you.

And you suppose that’s good too, but at some point, the good warps into bad, bad warps into terrible, and you wonder if this is all even worth the sleepless nights, wondering if he feels the same way.

Those thoughts haunt you more and more often every day. When you wake up, and text him first thing in the morning, your brain acknowledges that the camera is off - nobody’s around, people aren’t listening, so why are you still playing the role of a girlfriend and starting up a conversation with him when you haven’t even brushed your teeth properly? When you’re editing in the middle of the day and he calls to keep you company, making more stupid boyfriend jokes, your stomach flips in a weird way that makes you hate him, hate the way he can joke about these things so freely, like it doesn’t hurt him. Like it doesn’t affect him like it affects you.

But, as much as you wish you could hate him, you couldn’t bring yourself to, and that was the worst part. Because, in reality, whenever he laughed you’d smile without realising you did, whenever anything exciting happened to you he was the first one you went to, whenever you wanted to laugh or cry or sit in silence for hours or complain you always went to him, the one person who you know would listen. In reality, whenever he made a joke about giving up on the fake dating and making it real, you wished so bad that he was serious this time, that this was what it took and he’d crack and all of your suffering would end.

It eventually happens.

It’s a pretty chilly morning, birds chirp outside and the sun that slowly rises is covering the kitchen floor in a golden hue as you pour milk into your cereal with one hand and hold your phone in the other, letting Clay ramble about whatever it was this time, when he brought it up.

“So, when do you wanna come down to Florida again?” he asks casually, and you almost drop the gallon of milk in your hand.

“What?”

“I said, when are you coming down to Florida again? Last time you came was pretty fun.” he says, and an empty silence follows. There’s an unsaid “I miss you” that you don’t hear, and he’s too afraid of saying it.

“Florida wasn’t exactly on my schedule this month, man.” you say, placing your phone on the counter for a second. Clay sure knew how to surprise a person.

“Well put it down, then.” he jokes, and you hum.

“What, you got another wedding coming up?” you giggle and he groans - you never really stopped making fun of him for that wedding.

“No, I don’t. Can’t a man just miss seeing his beloved girlfriend?” It’s unbelievable how quickly dread can wash over you as soon as he makes one of those jokes. You were convinced the mix of anxiety and butterflies that appears in your stomach was gonna kill you sometime soon.

“He can, he’s just being weirdly insistent.” you argue nonetheless. “But sure, I’ll consider it.”

You do more than consider it - in a few weeks, you’re back at the airport, and falling into his arms has never given you such an adrenaline rush in your whole life. Something about having him wrapped around you, close to you, the warmth of his body radiating into yours sent you spiraling, head clouded with nothing but love and the fact that you wish you could stay there forever. You wished you could press pause and cherish the moment, let yourself bask in that feeling of pure love, pure adoration that you helplessly drowned in. But you couldn’t, and you left his arms feeling oddly empty.

Hiding the fact that you were unapologetically head over heels for him proved to be a hundred times more difficult when you were right there, next to him, talking to him, when you could just kiss him any second, feel his lips on yours and nobody would stop you - the opportunity was right there, looming over you, the devil on your shoulder taunting you, telling you to do it.

You got to wake up in the same house as him, watch his hair stick out in different directions and his raspy morning voice as he complained about the smell of your coffee, watch his eyes glint whenever he talked about something he liked and observe as he carried around Patches like a little baby. You got to experience every bit of domestic without the consequences of committing, and you wondered just how far this would go. For how much longer would the two of you blatantly ignore the fact that you were a couple that slapped the title “fake” on it because you were cowards who refused to admit what this truly was.

Not for long, apparently, because you grew tired, and decided to put an end to everything on one random Thursday night - and if he hated you forever for it, then so be it.

You were sitting on his couch, watching a random movie together, drowning in one of his Dream hoodies while you chewed the popcorn he made. It was dark outside, just past midnight, and you could see the branches of a tree swaying calmly through one of the nearby windows - the silence while he scrolled through his phone lazily was comforting too, everything was lazy and serene and it would’ve been perfect if it wasn’t for the constant anxiety that gripped you by the throat whenever you were in his close proximity, the nervousness that killed you, the upset feeling of wanting to cuddle up with him but knowing you can’t because you guys are just friends, and nothing more.

The couple on the screen kiss while a violin plays in the background - how fitting. Maybe that’s what pushes you to the edge, or maybe you were just that sick and tired.

You were exhausted, beyond exhausted. Your eyes were tired, the anxiety was morphing into annoyance and anger and you were ready to give up on it all. If this ended the friendship, at least you two had a good run. Your heart couldn’t take it anymore.

“You know, you still owe me a favor in return for pretending to be your girlfriend.” you say, and you sound gone, zoned out, more than you wish you were. You hear his phone turn off with a click.

“Yeah? What do you want?” Clay asks, and you blankly stare at the TV for a few seconds before turning to face him, eyes burning.

“Kiss me.”

It’s silent. The characters on screen are arguing. You hear the wind through one of his open windows.

“What?” he asks, voice cracking, and his expression falls. You’ve fucked it. Oh well.

“I want you to kiss me. Kiss me like you mean it. Kiss me like someone’s watching and you wanna make it believable.” you say, eyes boring into his, your words having nowhere near as much of an effect on yourself as they do on him. Your eyes sting like they’re being lit on fire, and your throat is sort of closing up, but it’s fine. “Let me have this before I go, because once I leave, I don’t wanna do this anymore, Clay. I can’t pretend like I don’t want you to introduce me as your girlfriend and fully mean it. I can’t lie to your face anymore.”

Silence. Deafening silence, once again.

“I love you.” he blurts out, and you don’t even register it at first. “I don’t want this shit to be fake either. God, I really don’t. It hasn’t been fake for a while now, at least not on my part. I’m sorry, it’s just- it was easier to keep this bit going than it was to actually admit that I’m… into you.”

And once again, the room falls into silence, much like it always does whenever the two of you share moments like these.

And then, you burst into laughter.

“So… so you mean to tell me, that both of us have liked each other this whooooole fucking time, and just refused to admit it and ‘pretended to date’ instead?” you burst into giggles, and he looks sort of hesitant to laugh, but he does anyway.

“I mean… yeah? I was waiting for you to call me out for doing all that when nobody was watching! Why did you never call me out?! Don’t blame me, I made it so damn obvious that I wanted you!” he protests, and you almost can’t believe what you’re hearing.

“Excuse me? You should’ve just fucking told me instead of making a million and one jokes about how I’m your girlfriend! We’re not in middle school, Clay!” you argue.

“Yeah, but I thought you’d catch on and talk to me about it at some point! You never called me out for anything!”

“So what, I’m supposed to just read your mind now? You’re fucking unbelievable.” you huff, crossing your arms over your chest and turning away in annoyance. As soon as a warm hand lands on your shoulder, though, the annoyance melts like wax under fire, leaving nothing behind.

“I still haven’t returned that favor, you know?” he whispers in your ear, breath fanning your neck, closer than he should be. The hairs on your neck stand up as you turn back to Clay, who wore a mischievous grin and a glint in his eyes that suggested no good.

You suppose bad can be good, sometimes.

As his lips press onto yours, that theory is proven true, because he sends a flicker of fire burning down your spine, spreading into your limbs, making your fingertips electric as you pulled him in closer, hand snaking up to grip at his hair - the everlasting grin against your own proves, once again, to be no good as his hands slip under your hoodie and grip your sides, but you think you enjoy this sort of bad.

They sneak up further, and you hear him chuckle into the kiss as your insides melt at his touch. The two of you silently agree that maybe he should ask for favors more often.

#dreamwastaken x reader #dreamwastaken imagine #dreamwastaken fluff #dreamwastaken fanfic #dreamwastaken angst #dream x reader #dream x you #dreamwastaken x y/n

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wildflowerirwin · 4 years

Text

Love Is War - m.c. Ch 2

Summary: When yeeyee meets a punk rock wannabe

Rating: PG-13

Words: 2.6k

Warnings: swearing

Michael woke up late into the afternoon, his head only slightly throbbing. He grabbed his phone off his nightstand and pulled his blankets up to his chin. He yawned as he opened Twitter, scrolling down through his timeline. Pictures of himself and Kaela were all that he could see. There were thousands of tweets proclaiming them as a new couple. Michael chewed on his lip as he swiped through the pictures of them together. There were pictures of them at the party, at the gas station, and kissing on the curb. Mike had to admit, he did find her rather gorgeous, even sober. He was pulled from his thoughts by his phone ringing, the caller-ID lighting up with ‘Tall, Dark, and Fucking Annoying.’ Michael sighed and tapped the little green button. “Yes?”

“Afternoon, Clifford. I trust you’ve had a good night’s sleep.” The deep voice of Martin, the head of Modest!Management, rang through the phone.

“Yeah, I had a nightmare where you called me. Oh, wait..” Michael’s tone dripped with sarcasm.

“Very funny.” Martin rolled his eyes. “After your stunt last night, we’ll need you to come down the office. We have some damage control to fix this. Be down here by 6.” Martin said, hanging up before Michael could argue. He reluctantly got up and got dressed, heading down to the management office. He walked inside and into the conference room, his eyes landing on Kaela’s icy blue ones.

“Kaela?” Michael raised an eyebrow as he sat across from her.

“Hi, Mike.” Kaela smiled softly.

“What’s this all about?” Michael asked, looking at Martin and Scott as they sat at the head of the table.

“It’s about the reaction to the two of you being together last night.” Martin said, pulling up a chart on the screen on the wall. “Fans have been going crazy since seeing you two together. Album sales have skyrocketed. Both of you have had increased site traffic and a 2% raise in social media followers.”

“Okay, so why are we here?” Michael asked, rolling his eyes slightly.

“For the time being, you two are going to be dating. Here is a schedule for upcoming public outings.” Scott said, handing both of them a packet. “In here, you’ll find the dates and times of all important sightings, such as: dinner dates, walks in the park, movie nights. You’ll also find outfit recommendations and requirements.”

“You want us to fake date?” Michael asked, looking at the two men.

“Essentially, yes.” Martin nodded. “Not forever, just until things settle down.”

“As long as this doesn’t ruin either of our careers when it ends, I’m fine with it.” Kaela said, leaning back in her chair as she twisted it from side to side.

“Kaela, please, keep your chair still.” Martin sighed, looking at Kaela.

“You give me a swively chair and expect me not to swivel? Yeah right, Marty.” Kaela shook her head and continued twisting.

“Whatever, you two can go, as soon as you sign these contracts. Your lawyers have already given the approval on the terms.” Tory said, sliding both of them a packet of papers.

“For the record, I don’t think this is going to work the way you all think it will.” Michael sighed, clicking his pen a few times as he read the first page of the contract. “I’m not a fan of that yeeyee shit, and I know a majority of my fans aren’t either.”

“Are you not the one who said your Spotify wrapped exposed you as a yeeyee?” Kaela asked, crossing her arms.

“Yes, but I’m a closet yeeyee. I can’t have my fans knowing that I’m an actual yeeyee.” He shrugged as he continued to flip through the contract.

“Whatever, just sign the contract so we can get out of here.” Kaela shook her head and signed her name on the line. Michael sighed and signed his name, sliding the contract back to Martin.

“Alright, your schedules are on pages 3 through 8 of the packet. We will send you text reminders as well. If you feel like going out on a different date or time, please let us know so we can get media coverage.” Tory said, leaning back in his seat.

“You gonna plan out every kiss for us too?” Michael rolled his eyes.

“No, you two do a fine job locking lips on your own.” Tory rolled his eyes back. “Just try to follow the schedule, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Mike sighed. “Are we done here? Like, can I go?”

“Yes, we are done. You’re both free to go.” Martin shook his head and packed the signed contracts into his briefcase. Michael and Kaela stood from their chairs and walked out of the room.

“What are your dinner plans?” Michael asked her as they waited for the elevator.

“Was gonna make an entire box of spaghetti and eat it while watching the same 4 movies on repeat.” She shrugged, scratching her eyebrow lightly.

“As fun as that sounds, why don’t you come with me tonight? It’s game night at Luke’s place.” He said, stepping into the elevator as the doors slid open.

“You really want me to go?” Kaela asked, looking up at the tall Australian next to her.

“You’re my girlfriend now, the guys need to see us together.” Michael shrugged, glancing down at her. He knew when he was drunk that she was beautiful, but seeing her sober only confirmed it. The way her auburn hair was falling out of the bun on the top of her head, her cheeks slightly red from the warm air of the elevator.

“Alright, I’ll go with you.” She nodded, looking down at her feet.

“Great, I’ll pick you up at 6.” Michael smiled softly to himself and exited the elevator.

“Great.” Kaela muttered to herself and walked out to her car.

*** Kaela was much more nervous than she thought she’d be. She had met Michael’s bandmates before, but something felt different about this one. She stood in front of the mirror in her bedroom, looking at her outfit. “I look like a fuckin’ yeeyee..” Kaela whispered to herself. Her cut off shorts and her cowboy boots didn’t help, but they were her trademark. She sighed and looked down at her phone as a text from Michael lit up her screen. “Guess there’s no time to change.” She sighed and shoved her phone into her pocket before jogging down to the car.

“I knew you were a yeeyee, but you’re really goin’ for it with this outfit.” Michael chuckled softly as Kaela slid into the passenger seat.

“Shut up.” Kaela laughed, crossing her arms. Michael shook his head playfully as he started driving, the radio filling their silence. She glanced slowly at him as Silver Wings by Merle Haggard played back at them. “This is old school country.”

“It’s an okay song.” Michael shrugged.

“You know, I was in a movie with Tim McGraw and this song was featured on the soundtrack.” Kaela said, turning the song up slightly.

“I did see that on your Wikipedia page.” Michael nodded as he drove.

“Oh, did you stalk me?” Kaela raised an eyebrow, watching the houses pass.

“I had to learn a few things about my new girlfriend.” Michael smiled. “I needed to know about where you grew up, what the beginning of your career was like.”

“You could’ve just asked.” Kaela laughed as Michael pulled into Luke’s driveway.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Michael chuckled and got out of the car, meeting Kaela at the front door. “You nervous?”

“Extremely.” Kaela sighed, holding Michael’s hand as he pushed the door open. She followed him in and squeezed his hand as all eyes turned to them.

“The fuck?” Luke looked at Michael.

“Guys, this is my girlfriend.” He grinned, wrapping his arm around Kaela’s waist.

“Oh? You’re dating a yeeyee now?” Luke asked.

“I am dating a yeeyee and you’re gonna support me.” Michael said, bringing Kaela to the living room.

“I’ll support you if she proves herself worthy. If she can beat me at Monopoly, she’s worthy of my best friend.” Luke said, pulling out the game box.

“Oh, so you want to end my relationship before it’s even begun? What a good friend you are.” Michael huffed as he sat on the carpet next to the coffeetable.

“Y’all ready to lose or not?” Kaela asked, sitting in Michael’s lap.

“Big talk from Miss. Hick.” Ashton chuckled, handing both of them a bottle of Miller Light.

“I’m not a hick. Hicks marry their cousins.” Kaela said and took a sip of her beer, making a disgusted face. “Beer tastes like dirt.”

“Good dirt.” Calum defended.

“There’s no such thing as good dirt.” Kaela rolled her eyes. “Give me the dice, I’m going first.” Luke handed the dice to Kaela and she rolled, moving the shoe piece 4 spaces. Though the beer did in fact taste like dirt, Kaela continued to drink it.

“You don’t have to drink it, babe. I can drink it for you.” Michael said, rubbing his thumb over Kaela’s hip.

“I would like to do shots.” Kaela said, leaning back against Michael.

“Oh, she wants one of those game nights? Well, let’s give the lady what she wants.” Luke chuckled and walked over to his liquor cabinet. “I’ve got tequila, vodka, whiskey.”

“Bring them all.” Calum said. “We might as well do it all.”

“Tequila and whiskey hurt, so I’ll be doing vodka.” Michael said, taking a shot glass from Luke. Each of them filled their glasses and the shots were knocked back, each of them making faces.

“Luke, you got any soda or juice for mixers? I make the best mixed drinks.” Kaela said, looking at Luke.

“Take a look through the kitchen, take whatever you’d like.” He nodded and Kaela stood up. As she walked to the kitchen, the three boys turned and looked at Michael.

“Yes?” Michael asked, raising an eyebrow.

“You’re dating a yeeyee? For real?” Calum asked.

“She’s more than a yeeyee.” Michael sighed and set his beer down. “She’s funny and talented and so down to earth.”

“Okay, you can crawl out of her ass now.” Ashton crossed his arms. “What’s really going on with you two?”

“I’m being serious. I really like her. She’s just so real and she treats me like I’m normal.” Michael said, looking down at his lap.

“I want to see how yeeyee she gets when she’s drunk. Like how we all get very Australian when we’re drunk.” Luke said as he stood up. He walked out of the living room and joined Kaela in the kitchen, where she had an empty shot glass to her lips. “Uh, hi.” Luke said, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Hi.” Kaela blushed, setting the empty glass down on the counter.

“How many of those have you had?” Luke asked, pouring himself a glass of tequila.

“Just 3.” Kaela shrugged, making herself and Michael a fuzzy navel. “What kinds of drinks do Ashton and Calum like?”

“Ashton likes whiskey and Calum’s a tequila guy. But, I’m sure they’d drink anything you made.” Luke said, leaning against the counter.

“Right, no pressure.” Kaela sighed, making a rum and coke for both of them. Luke picked up the rum and cokes and brought them out to the living room as Kaela brought the fuzzy navels. Kaela sat back in Michael’s lap and handed him the glass.

“What’s this?” He asked, looking at the glass.

“Fuzzy navel.” Kaela said, taking a sip of her own. Michael smiled to himself and took a sip.

“I’m bored of Monopoly.” Calum said, sipping the rum and coke.

“Let’s play a drinking game.” Luke suggested, earning grins from his friends.

The drinking game consisted of watching an episode of Family Guy and drinking every time you got bored of the episode, so it didn’t take long for the five of them to feel the alcohol. “Okay, okay, what’s that dance that you yeeyee people do?” Ashton asked, breaking the silence. There were empty glasses and shot glasses on the floor surrounding the coffee table, as well as on the surface.

“The two-step?” Kaela asked, pouring herself and Michael another tequila shot.

“Yeah, that’s the one.” Ashton nodded. “How do you do it?”

“First, you need music.” Kaela said, downing her shot.

“What song works for it?” Ashton asked, getting Spotify pulled up on Luke’s TV.

“Literally any yeeyee song will work, Ashton.” Michael said, downing his shot.

“He’s right.” Kaela said, taking the remote from Ashton. She found a today’s country playlist, hitting shuffle. “This will work.” She said, standing up. She held her hands out to Ashton and pulled him up with her. She held one of his hands and placed the other on his hip. “Put your hand on my shoulder.”

“This feels weird.” Ashton said, placing his hand on her shoulder.

“Well, you’re probably used to leading, but now I’m leading.” Kaela said. “Now, follow my feet. It’s one step forward and two steps back.” She explained as she pulled him along with her, the gentle sounds of Old Dominion’s “Make It Sweet” echoing through Luke’s living room as they danced.

“Okay, great. He’s got it down. My turn.” Michael said as he stood up. “She’s my girlfriend, I get to dance with her.” Michael grabbed Kaela’s hand and pulled her close to him. In his mind he knew that she wasn’t really his girlfriend, but the jealousy he felt at seeing her dance with his best friend was real. Kaela’s giggle was like music to his ears as she held onto his shoulder.

“I already know you know how to dance.” Kaela looked up at him.

“Doesn’t mean I don’t want to do it.” Michael smiled and rubbed his thumb along the exposed skin of her hip.

“Ashton, teach me how to do it.” Calum said, grabbing Ashton’s hand. Luke sat on the floor, bobbing his head to the music as Dan & Shay’s “Tequila” played back at them. Kaela laughed to herself and laid her head on Michael’s shoulder as she watched Calum and Ashton dancing together.

“You guys are doing great.” She smiled, genuinely impressed at how quickly they caught on.

“Well, looky here.” Luke smirked as he watched the screen of his TV. The familiar chords filled the room and Kaela gasped.

“No!” She whined, hiding her face in Michael’s chest as her own track echoed through the room. “Change the song.”

“Why? This one’s, like, the best one off your first album.” Michael said, holding her body close to his.

“This is absolutely not the best song on my first album. The best song on my album is ‘Lose The War.’” Kaela said.

“What? No, that song is totally depressing.” Calum interjected.

“Wait, how many of you have actually listened to my albums? Like actually listened to them.” Kaela asked, looking at the group.

“Me and Calum listened together.” Ashton said.

“I have not heard the whole thing, because I do not like country music.” Luke said, laying on his back on the hardwood floor.

“Okay, well, don’t listen to it. I don’t want you guys to know about my life.” Kaela said, sitting back down on the floor.

“Well, you’re dating our best friend. So, we need to know you. We have to make sure you’re the right girl for him.” Ashton said, sitting back down on the couch with Calum.

“Tell you what..” Kaela started. “I want you all to listen to my album, really listen to it. Next time I see you all, we’ll have a little discussion about your thoughts and if I’m good enough for you best friend. Deal?”

“Deal.”

Taglist: @flowers-on-the-graves @calumculture @kinglycalum @babylon-corgis @novacanecalum @lfwallscouldtalk @dontdoitluke @isabella10028 @bumblebet-20 @lockthisheartinchains @bitterbethany @sublimehood @myloverboyash @ironicallyirwin @lashtoncurls @mukesreject @sanfrancjsco @boytoynamedcalum @opinionatedpisces-official @blahehblah @lukehemmings @calum-uncrowned @findingliam-o @gh0st-0f-y0u-95 @gosh-im-short @baldcalum @ukulelecal @noshamenion @talkfastromance4 @galcalirwin @cxddlyash @spicycal @scorpiomichaell @calyumthomas @heavenisapeach @cals-wildflower @5sosfivesos @irwindoll @thenotsoartsybitch @beautiflybybri @loverofmineluke

#5sos #Michael clifford #5 seconds of summer #5sos smut #5sos fic #5sos writing #5sos imagine #my writing #imagine #Michael fic #Ashton irwin #calum hood #Luke hemmings

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harrypotterandthefandomaccount · 5 years

Text

SOS

request: Hey, I was wondering if you could do a Snape x reader where they used to go to school together but since he was so hung up on lily and with being bullied etc. He became rude and stuff to R so she left him, and now she comes back and doesn’t remember him (you can make up why) and you can choose how it ends :)

note: hope you guys enjoy this cuz this came to me at like 1am last night and i just wrote it. also i really hope this doesnt offend anybody, i just couldnt think of anything else

warnings: PTSD, war, death, jokes about depression/anxiety/PTSD, Iraq War mentions

“You should go and visit, you know,” your therapist, Meredith said. Her hands were folded atop her stomach as she relaxed, notebook lazily thrown on her table.

You sat across from her, hands playing with the candy wrapper that had been pre-occupying your mind, “right, and I should do that because?”

Meredith chuckled, “definitely not related to the past hour I just spent with you. Y/N, you were in Iraq, away from the Wizarding World and you got shot. In the head. Not only that, you had amnesia.”

With a sigh, you threw the wrapper in the trash, “have, and I didn’t know that.” Sarcasm dripped from your words.

“And seeing an old place can help you retrace your memory, bringing back old times that you lost; this can be very beneficial,” she said, leaning forward in her seat.

You licked your lips, “and if I find and remember something bad?”

Meredith held up her phone, “ringer is always on.”

“So I’ve noticed; you tweet something very controversial because I know those sounds were from Twitter,” you joke, standing to gather your things.

Your therapist shook her head as she showed you the door, “keep in touch.”

Walking away, you said, “a cry a day keeps your therapist away!”

As you drove home, the only thing on your mind was Hogwarts. Reaching out hadn’t been your thing ever since the war, not wanting to get the look or talk of sympathy. But the Wizarding World was different from the muggle world, so who would know? Well, maybe the people who remember you.

Pulling into your driveway, you parked your car and grabbed your bag. Walking into the small but mighty house, you snapped three times to remember who and where you were, hearing the sounds of your owl Coco.

Seeing her in her cage, you immediately let her out and pet her. “Hey girl,” you whispered, “I might ask you to deliver something tonight. It’s urgent.”

She rubbed her head against your cheek, “I’m fine, everything’s okay!”

Grabbing a piece of paper, an envelope, and a quill, you snapped again, “Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hogwarts...”

Coco hummed and you closed your eyes, “Dumbledore. Professor Dumbledore, right. Right.”

Beginning your letter, you asked your old Professor to let you come back for a short visit, not going into your whole PTSD/loss of memory drama, just some amnesia. Not a big deal. You miss the magic and the castle, even though you can’t even remember it.

With a melted-candle seal, you sent Coco on her way to Hogwarts. It shouldn’t be far, hoping to see her the following morning. The sun had gone down, stars covering the night sky as you witnessed people turning off their lights. Getting ready for bed by your routine, you laid in bed anxiously waiting for Coco until deciding to sleep.

It felt like it hadn’t been long until Coco arrived in the morning, letter in claws. Shrieking you awake, you snapped your fingers three times to remind yourself.

“Good morning to you too, Coco,” you yawned, trying to calm her down.

Looking at the letter, your head ached until you tried to remember, “letter, Dumbledore...right! Oh - oh my gosh, okay!”

Coco landed next to you as you opened the letter, reading over it. Your owl awaited your expressions as she noticed your smile, “looks like I have to pack...bit of a vacation.”

Packing up a week’s worth of clothes and supplies, you immediately headed to the train station Dumbledore mentioned in his letter. He told you exactly where to go - 9 and 3/4. If it’s difficult to find, a student of his wouldn’t mind helping. It is September, after all. Right! September, school starting.

Stopping between 9 and 10, you stood and stared at the columns of brick. Looking down at the letter, you reread it over and over, “9 and 3/4...”

A mother was heard scolding her kids as she hurried along, “c’mon Weasleys, we haven’t got all day! You too, Harry; I love you like my own son but you are as slow as a sloth.”

All five kids stopped as an older woman stood them in a line, telling them to send letters from school. Then, each one ran into the column, disappearing!

You gasped, “what the-”

The older woman looked at you, “old trick to Hogwarts, never gets old...”

Why did she look so familiar?

All her kids were redheads - well, except the brunette - and she said Weasley. Weasley, Weasley, Weasley...

“Y/N L/N?” the woman asked. She beat you to it. Two teen boys looked on as the woman had the ‘pity eyes.’

Your fingers snapped, “yes, uh yes, that is me. I’m sorry, do I...do I know you?”

She had a kind face, wrinkles showing years of knowledge, “yes, you do. No need to explain yourself to me, dear. I’m Molly Weasley and this is my son Ron and his best friend Harry.”

You gave a small wave, “hey there.” They waved back, gentle smiles on their faces.

Molly turned her attention back to you, “are you visiting Hogwarts?”

With a nod and a smile, you answered her question, “indeed I am. I’m not entirely sure why but I was told I should.”

The woman chuckled, “I wish I could go every day with my kids...Are you staying for personal business or?”

You shook your head, “my therapist thinks revisiting old places of my life will...” -Let's not bring up your horrible past life- “bring peace.”

Molly smiled, “and Hogwarts is the place to be! Well, if I don’t see you, try to reach out sometime, dear.” With that, she turned around and talked with her boys.

“I want you to take her to Professor Dumbledore as soon as you arrive. Go with her everywhere and make sure she is okay, you hear me?” Harry and Ron nodded as Molly stood back.

You gave a slight wave, “see you...” Your fingers snapped, “Molly.” With that, you and the two boys walked through the column, quickly going onto the train and somehow finding an empty cart. It seemed as if everyone knew who you were except you, eyes of civilians and children looking at you.

The train ride to Hogwarts seemed endless until you stopped, not hesitating to get your things and hop off the damn thing. Seeing bright lights of lanterns brought you back somewhere, you just weren’t sure where.

Carriages were being driven by horses - or what you thought looked like horses - as you analyzed your surroundings, trying to snap but wanting to take everything in. Harry stood by your side, “you’ve been?”

You nodded, “I’m sure I have, just not sure when.”

The young boy shrugged, “well you can ride with Ron and me, also our friends Hermione, Neville, and Luna.”

With a smile, you didn’t hesitate to go towards the carriage and hop on with Harry behind you. You looked past Luna, “beautiful horse.”

The blonde seemed to agree, “calm beings, of course. Only those who have seen death can experience their beauty.”

The carriage ride became quiet until you spoke up, “Y/N L/N.” Around the small area, the students introduced themselves. They were certainly going to make you feel old.

As you passed over the river and towards Hogwarts, your heart raced. You snapped your fingers to remind yourself of who and where you were. Students hopped off the carriages, luggage hauling them along inside the castle.

Candles were floating as the knights of the castle moved to let everyone through. Voices filled the castle as a feast had begun but you didn’t join. Rather, you needed an explanation. Who were these people and why does that guy in the giant hat look so familiar?

Large footsteps were heard as a hand landed on your shoulder, “aye, Y/N, is that you?”

Your head spun, “oh! Oh, yes, yes, I am Y/N.”

The very large man towered over you as tiny hairs from his beard fell, “it’s wonderful ta see ya! How ya been?”

You snapped your fingers, “listen, I’m very sorry but I-I don’t know who you are and I’ve realized this is a huge mistake and I never - no.”

You failed to notice Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall step into the hall, pulling you aside. Dumbledore started, “how are you, Miss/Mr. L/N?”

“Stressed, surrounded, very confused but living so that’s a plus,” you said, nodding to the old man. “Professor Dumbledore?”

He nodded, “in the flesh. And of course, Professor McGonagall.”

You smiled, “oh, Professor McGonagall!” Wrapping your arms around her, she rubbed your back, “hello, dear.”

Pulling back, you sighed, “it is wonderful to see you both! No, you three. Crap, I’m deeply sorry...”

Hagrid didn’t seem a bit offended, “Hagrid!”

You laughed, “Hagrid! Of course - it was there.”

Dumbledore gave a slight smile, “Minerva, would you mind taking over as I talked with our guest?” With a nod, McGonagall and Hagrid headed inside the Great Hall while you locked arms with your old professor.

“It is beautiful to see a past student here,” Dumbledore said, guiding you around the castle you once saw as home.

You grasped his arm, “it’s great to be back, Professor...I just wish I could remember it. That bullet to the head - it messed with me more ways that you could imagine.”

Dumbledore seemed to tighten his grip for a second until he relaxed, “Severus doesn’t know. You don’t remember him but the both of you were the best of friends, making a great team with Lily Potter.”

A small smile grew on your lips, “Lily, Lily, Lily...”

Professor Dumbledore continued, “you stopped talking after school. Severus had said some hateful things to you and you didn’t hide away. Vicious, it was. But it got worse after the Potter’s died. Severus worked here and never mentioned you - as if you never existed.”

You furrowed your eyebrows, “it sounds familiar - the name - it really does.”

He nodded, “I know, my dear. I know many things and regaining lost memories is something of extreme difficulty and sometimes pain.”

Silence enveloped the two of you as your walk seemed to almost end. However, footsteps were heard from down the hall, someone calling Professor Dumbledore's name, “Ablus!”

The tall man stopped before the both of you, locking eyes with yours as he seemed to have lost his voice, “I heard...hello.”

Dumbledore directed his hand towards the man, “Y/N, this is Severus Snape. Severus, you remember Y/N.”

Severus’ eyebrows raised, “Albus, we know-”

“I was in Iraq in the muggle world and I was shot in the head three times but saved by my helmet yet it altered my long term memory,” you said, heart racing at the sight of this man.

He seemed speechless, “I...I apologize. Albus, may I?”

Dumbledore handed you off to Severus as he gave a slight wave, “come back to the Great Hall later tonight. We have much to talk about.”

Severus and you locked arms, taking a turn down the hall even further away from dinner. Snape gazed at you, “I know you don’t remember...but I’m sorry for what I said all those years ago.”

A slight laugh left your lips, “it’s quite alright. While I don’t remember what was said, I’ve been given another chance to start over.”

Snape stopped walking, “I spent a lot of time loving and grieving over Lily Potter. Grieving not only when she died but when James seemingly took her away from us. It was unfair to you...I never listened and I hurt you, so, so bad.”

You shrugged, “I wish I could remember what we did to hurt each other so bad for you to get teary-eyed.” You smiled and ran your thumb over Snape’s cheek.

He held your hand against his cheek, “over dinner? We can talk?”

A smile formed, “are you asking me on a date, Severus?”

Snape held out his arm for you to take, “my dear, it can be whatever you want it to be.”

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migleefulmoments · 5 years

Note

Abby has a 'CC 2017 A Year in Review' post. It's fascinating. Totally convinced me they are 100000000% correct. Darren and Chris were both at 2 events. Darren wore his God Save the Queer shirt. TLOS is definitely a representation of CC.Oh, there are pictures of them in similar poses!!! They tweeted on the same day!! Darren sang songs from Glee. I'm convinced. She really knows her shit. #sarcasm is dripping off this message, btw. She's a certifiable nutcase. Go read for yourself. its Hilarious!

I cracked up when she said they were both at the LA Women’s March with the several million other people who went. How is that different from “they both live in LA”?

The God Save the Queer T-shirt is her most treasured post-Glee “proof”. She is sure that he wears that because he is saying ‘I’m queer’. It isn’t simply that he is wearing a LGBTQ-positive shirt to an LGBTQ events. Darren and Mia’s entire group carried pro-LGBTQ and women’s signs at the women’s march.

They also both went to a huge Adam Lambert concert thousands of their friends. The man was on Glee and Darren never misses a music event... of course they went. One rando posted a Tweet claiming that Darren and Chris were talking and Abby buys it. His 27 likes and 4 retweets is proof enough for me! It’s cclove.

Darren and Chris both went to spirit day- a LGBTQ support event. That’s huge...why would both men attend an LGBTQ-positive hosted by their friend Justin Trantor if they weren’t together? It makes NOOOO sense. THEY WORE MATCHING OUTFITS, FFS!!!! Jeans, a Jean jacket and a t-shirt is not a common outfit for a 30-ish yo man at a causal event so IT’S PROOF. History is not wrong!

We cannot forget TLOS 6: A Love Letter to Darren Criss by Chris Colfer. Darren released a song called Lost Boys Life written by his brother that is clearly about a man on the road missing his love. But ccers immediately declared that Darren actually wrote it -plausible deniability-because it “reeks of CC”. That along with it’s Peter Pan reference and Chris’s dedication “Let’s never grow old together” is PROOF PROOF PROOF PROOF OMG ITS PROOF. And O.M.G. Froggy is on the cover in the Mirror that MorInA put him in and Chris is a petty dick so we know that is about Darren. He also called MorInA a goat - he’s such a misogynistic dick and I LOVE IT.

“And this amazing quote that speaks for itself:“Only idiots listen with their eyes” she said. “if people don’t hear your words, that shout them. If people silence you, then write your message with fire. Demanding respect is never easy but if something you love is at stake, then i’d say it’s worth the price”. (Ok, I gotta be honest, all sarcasm aside, how the fuck does she not see this is what she is doing and realize he was calling out people like her? How does she believe this was something cc positive? Also all the STFF stuff...how is she so obtuse?).

Oh I forgot they both posted childhood photos on the same TBT -nobody else did that...nope never.

Chris denied he watched AVPM -not because it’s been a decade and he forgot-or it doesn’t really mean anything to him but because CC IS SO ON. “Denial of AVPMI know for a fact this was not a planned question. He was caught by surprise and instead of answering truthfully, Chris got flustered and denied seeing AVPM when it has been documented countless times that not only has he seen it, he was a huge fanboy.”

Also these two nonsense statements “That time when Chris was asked if he kept in touch with D and he said “Kind of Sort of”The Promo Interview right before TLOS was released on the SocialIf it’s on social media, you’re not happenin’. I try to keep my personal life personal, and not mix the two. It’s hard to do, but I try.” All CC positive moments in 2017.

I’m just going to leave this one without sarcastic comment because it speaks for itself:

A Doll’s House Part 2.

“A show chris saw when promoting TLOS and that months later we discover Darren saw as well yet not one photo or tweet placing him there unlike the myriad of other shows he sees where there are copious pics and accounts. Both loved it.” (Ok, I give it a Huh? Darren goes out all the time and we don’t know most of the time. He has said so but of course he didn’t say so with a social media post so ccers don’t count it).

Chris wore his “cc” scarf in London...yes a scarf he wore in an actual picture of Chris and Darren from an early event is somehow a cc scarf. Oi vey.

and Darren’s ccfamous tweet where he used a Batman gif saying “I don’t want this” is ccproof becuase he was telling us he doesn’t want his life but he’s in too deep to get out now

When will this end?

This was followed by Chris’ Epic Snap Chat, Don’t you wish your bunny was cute like me that can be found here (x)” in which Chris posted a filter of a bunny on his face and voice singing “don’t you wish your bunny was hot like me’ I would imagine that Mia must have used a similar filter somewhere int he last 6 months prior to this “so much shade” from Chris. Again he’s a dick.

And there was the time Darren waited over a week to respond to a tweet, a tweet posted on May 27. It should be noted he chose his tweet to respond of the likely thousands he was tagged in as i was right after the selfie and the CG show. Further, he replied right after Chris posted his Peru pic where he claims to have spent his birthday. (In other words I”m really grasping here)

I Don’t Mind” a song that is so clearly about Chris even though he has since mentioned he wrote it during his teenage years in San Fransisco. Her 2017 proof isn’t that he wrote the song about Chris but that he didn’t play it in 2017 even though it was on two playlists and he made a big to do about no playing it at Elsie Fest.

“Remember that Variety Article, an Exclusive About Indigo that originally contained this quote:Colfer’s news comes a day after his former on-screen love interest Darren Criss reunited with Murphy with a starring role on season three of anthology American Crime Story. So mysterious how it was edited out almost immediately”.

TLOS movie and ACS Versace moving to season 2 happened on the same day- I believe that movie news is in Variety on the same day hence it gets out to press on the same day.

Then we come to more mirror imagine photos -years apart

Darren sang Glee songs which means he loves Chris- Hopelessly Devoted

“The Day the Dance is Over The video from the first time we heard this beautiful and incredibe love song about a dedicated love full of obstacles (and every version since as continued to amaze)” Another song that plausible deniability was written by Darren not Chuck.

“And Critical to Remember, 2017, the year both C&D made a deal with Fox. This is going to majorly contribute to 2018″

(X)

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bangtanoneshotsx · 6 years

Text

Scared Of Not Being Good Enough pt 2-Suga

part one

Yoongi clicked the play button on his computer, letting the song he was working on fill the room, ignoring the shouts of Jungkook outside his door. Frowning, he waited until the song had finished before writing down some new ideas. Suspiciously, Jungkook had stopped, silence filling the studio one more.

“Are you mad?” Jungkook’s voice filled the room making Yoongi jump in his seat before turning to face the youngest.

“Jesus Jungkook. Who said it was okay for you to come in?” Jungkook gave a sheepish smile, before speaking softly.

“You gave me the passcode hyung. You weren’t letting me in so I decided to do it myself.”

“Did you ever think I didn’t open the door for a reason? Maybe I don’t want to talk to anyone. Especially about what I did.” Jungkook gave a sigh, ignoring the rappers protests, sitting down on the sofa across from Yoongi.

“You really need to come out of the studio. You need to talk to us at least. You need to let us help you. You can’t lock yourself away for the rest of your life.”

“I don’t need some kid who’s four years younger than me to tell me what I need.” Yoongi growled. As he watched Jungkook’s face fall he gave a tired sigh, running a hand over his face.

“Sorry. How is she?” Jungkook knew he had to chose his next words carefully. Yoongi was in an emotional state just now and the last thing Jungkook wanted was to be thrown out of the studio, especially when this was the biggest breakthrough of the week.

“She’s upset. Your letter explained why you chose to do what you did, so she understands. Doesn’t mean she likes it, but she knows once you make up your mind you have a hard time changing it.” Yoongi furrowed as he heard the younger speak.

“That sounds like something Namjoon would say.” Jungkook gave a gulp under the cold stare of the elder. At Jungkook’s guilt ridden face Yoongi gasped, before exclaiming,

“He told you what to write!”

“He didn’t!” Jungkook defended, avoiding eye contact, an obvious sign to Yoongi that he was lying.

“Great. That’s great. They’ve sent the youngest in hopes I don’t shout at you.” Maybe Yoongi had been locked in his studio for too long. Maybe it was time to come out and face the music.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The door to the dance studio swung open revealing a pissed off Yoongi followed by a worried Jungkook. Looking up the leader’s posture straightened, an eyebrow raised in surprise.

“Yoongi. It’s good to see you out of your studio.” Hoseok spoke first, stopping the song that was playing, grabbing a towel to wipe the sweat from his forehead. The elder gave a small smile and nod to the dancer.

“Do you want to explain why you got the youngest to do your dirty work?” Yoongi turned to face Namjoon again, ignoring Jungkook who ran past him to stand next to Taehyung and Jimin. Sighing, Namjoon ran a hand through his hair.

“I knew you’d listen to him. Also he had the passcode so if you didn’t let him in he could go in himself.” Yoongi rolled his eyes, giving a huff at the leader’s logic. Namjoon gave a gentle smile, nodding his head in the direction of the back of the room. Following the younger to sit in a circle.

“Let’s get this over with.” Yoongi muttered, looking towards Taehyung, knowing he would be the one most angry with him.

“Your baby’s fine.” Taehyung spoke first, sarcasm dripping from his tongue. “I know you desperately want to know. Y/N had her first ultrasound, doctor says everything’s going to plan.” Taehyung stared at Yoongi, watching his reaction to the news of his child. Yoongi lowered his head, furrowing his eyebrows as he felt a pain in his heart. He didn’t dare look at the other six while asking in a small voice,

“How is Y/N?” Jin sighed before beating Taehyung to answer the eldest rapper’s question knowing Taehyung’s tone of voice wouldn’t help the situation.

“She’s good, she’s having trouble with morning sickness but that normal early on. She’s starting to show, she’s really excited about that, says it makes it feel more real.” Yoongi nodded, keeping his eyes on the floor.

“Yoongi look at us.” Namjoon demanded, watching as the elder slowly raised his head, nervously making eye contact with him.

“You need to tell us how you feel. You locked yourself in your studio straight away so we haven’t had the chance to ask.” Yoongi sighed, letting his eyes wander as he tried to gather his thoughts. His breath hitched as he noticed a book poking out of Namjoon’s bag. ‘What To Expect When You’re Expecting.’

“I should have that.” Yoongi whispered, his mouth in a small pout.

“What?” Namjoon asked before following Yoongi’s eye-line to his bag in the corner of the room. Swearing under his breath Namjoon turned to face the rapper who was now on the edge of breaking down.

“That should be me reading that. I should be using that so I can help my girlfriend. Instead I’m hiding from her like a coward.” Tears started to roll down his cheeks, keeping his eye on the book. “Can I...Can I borrow it?” Yoongi stammered out, finally looking at Namjoon who gave a gentle smile, nodding.

“Of course. You need to know what’s going to happen when you go back to her.” Yoongi looked down, sighing.

“I don’t know if I can.”

“What!” Taehyung suddenly exclaimed, anger bubbling up inside him.

“I don’t know if I can go back to Y/N. This life isn’t what I want for her, or for my child. I don’t want my child to grow up and see tweets on how they ruined BTS, how they weren’t wanted. I can’t do that to them, I won’t do that to them.”

“You had this life when you began a relationship with Y/N. What changed?” Jimin spoke for the first time.

“I thought it would change by the time we even considered having children. I never thought I’d be having one this early. Me supporting from a distance is the best way to keep everyone happy. Fans get their Suga and my child still gets their father.”

“But you’re not happy.” Yoongi looked to the youngest giving a small sad smile.

“That doesn’t really matter does it? I can’t sacrifice the happiness of others just for my own. I need to keep my fans happy, and I can’t stop you six reaching your potential.” The six boys all felt the same emotion at once. Yoongi’s sacrifice touching each of their hearts. Namjoon knew they had to do something. The question was how was he going to do it without Yoongi knowing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yoongi stared out into the crowd of fans. For once he didn’t have anyone in front of him so he took time to wave to the ones sitting. Fixing the headband a fan had given him, he noticed an album was passed to him. Muttering a small thanks to Namjoon who sat to his right Yoongi looked up to the fan before him.

“This is for you.” The fan shyly spoke, placing a gift bag in front of Yoongi. Giving a grin Yoongi looked in the bag only to frown when he didn’t recognise the item. Pulling out the small item of clothing, Yoongi broke into a small smile as he realised what it was. A small onesie with ‘I’m with the band’ written across the front. Yoongi gave a chuckle, thanking the fan.

“I hope you know we support you in whatever you do. The real fans that will stay with you are happy for you and your girlfriend. Please ignore the one’s that aren’t.”

“How did you know?” Yoongi asked softly, amazed by the fan’s gesture.

“Namjoon wrote on the fancafe, explained everything.” Yoongi gave a small nod, thanking the fan once more before placing the present back in the bag and moving the album to Taehyung.

As the event went on the pile of presents behind Yoongi grew. Each present had something to do with the news he had just released. Yoongi’s heart warmed as he placed another present, this time a small brown bear, into it’s bag.

“Do you understand now?” Namjoon asked Yoongi quietly. The elder nodded as he looked out to the crowd.

“We all care about your happiness Yoongi, both the fans and the band. Don’t feel like you need to sacrifice anything for us. We’ll stay behind you with whatever you chose.” Yoongi gave a grateful grin to the leader who seemed wise beyond his years.

“Thank you Namjoon. Right now I chose to go back to my girlfriend and become a dad. If she accepts me.” Yoongi whispered before accepting another album greeting another fan who had a present in her hand.

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therewatcher-blog · 5 years

Text

Introduction to The Re-Watcher: First Up, Gilmore Girls

Recently, I’ve accepted something about myself. I love re-watching television. I don’t think this is unique. In fact a good chunk of the streaming business model is predicated on the fact that most of us like what we already know. I started my third? fourth? rewatch of Gilmore Girls at the beginning of the month, and decided that rather than just mindlessly blazing through these rewatches of shows with the random tweet reinforcing the viewpoints I’ve always had, I thought I’d try to be a more active viewer. It will never be the first time again. I will always know what is going to happen to the characters in my beloved shows that merit this amount of hours devoted. So instead, I decided that each time I rewatch a show, I will choose a topic and focus on it in a mini-write up for each episode. Not only will this stop me from watching too quickly, I hope it will help me in forming skills writing about TV and maybe I’ll learn something new about the shows I love as I watch with a specific goal in mind.

We’ll start with Gilmore Girls. The topic I’ve chosen is, The Best Underrated Scene. I want to focus on the scenes that don’t get necessarily quoted as much or that catch me off guard in my rewatch with their depth, brilliance, and significance. Amy Sherman-Palladino has finally gotten some awards and recognition with her newest show, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, but her talent was evident from the beginning and her cast in Gilmore Girls certainly did everything they could to take it to the next level. I want to look beyond the big fights and big cries and find those nuggets that offer depth to even the more cartoonish of Stars Hollow characters or reveal an important character trait and dynamic in a subtle way. Let’s see how this goes!

1x01 – Pilot

Pilots are difficult. I know this from watching many and from hearing screenwriters talk about it. Comedy is particularly difficult, it seems. With the exception of Veep, Cheers, and maybe Arrested Development, I have a hard time thinking of comedy pilots that operate at the same level of the show in its prime. Gilmore Girls was marketed as a typical WB teen drama, but also, it’s really a smart show about family and class. It’s a comedy, a family drama, a small town fantasy. It’s so many things and the pilot has a LOT of exposition to get through in as smooth a way as possible for a show whose premise is deceptively simple. As such, finding a truly great and understated scene that isn’t bogged down by introducing our big dynamics and long arcs for the season and series (Lorelai and Rory, Lorelai and her parents, Lorelai and Luke, Rory and Dean, the Inn, Stars Hollow, etc, etc, etc.) is difficult.

With all of this in mind, my first pick for Best Underrated Scene is maybe a bit of cheat since all the scenes in this that are really worth talking about are all a bit iconic.

Lorelai Asks Her Parents for Money

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=njZo0lvgCsY

This is almost halfway through the episode. It’s the turning point and the whole premise for the show. While Lorelai and Rory are interesting and fun and I enjoy their dynamic, Lorelai and her parents (Emily and Richard) will always steal the episode away with their interplay. The strain between these two generations is painted so beautifully and delicately from the beginning. The transition to this sequence comes from a picture that Lorelai keeps on her mantelpiece of herself as a young child in front of her parent’s mansion that seems dark and cold compared to the warm, tchotchke–riddled home that Lorelai has built for herself. Lorelai is looking at this picture as she realizes her only option to pay for Rory’s new fancy school is to borrow money from her parents. We cross-fade from this small token of Lorelai’s childhood to the present-day real deal. But even the fact that Lorelai has this picture is telling. For every bad thing she has to say about her upbringing and her parents, a part of her still holds ties. As the series continues we will see in which ways Lorelai is really a lot like her parents, but for now this maybe is just a slight hint that nothing has ever been as black and white as Lorelai likes to act like it was.

Lorelai waits with her coffee, next to her Jeep (which obviously stands out against the backdrop of her parents house…”HELLO! I’m different from you!” Lorelai loves to scream with all of her purchases). She is gulping down her pride, finding the courage to go in and do what she never in her lifetime wanted to do. Cut to Emily opening the door, clearly surprised to see her daughter who only lives forty minutes away. “Is it Easter already?” she jokes. While we constantly have instances throughout the show of Emily and Richard not understanding Lorelai’s jokes, we can see from this first interaction that she probably got much of her wit from them. Emily is hilarious. She is maybe a bit harsher in her sarcasm, a bit drier than Lorelai’s hyper-joking mannerisms, but it is there and we see it right away. I love even more so that Richard makes the same joke when he first discovers Lorelai there unexpectedly (“What is it, Christmas already?”). Emily and Richard’s marriage has it’s ups and downs in the show, but they are solidly made for each other in many ways. They have a partnership that has lasted for decades and it shows in the way they at times seem to have one mind.

As Lorelai and Emily make their way to the living room, making awkward chitchat we are greeted with maybe the longest pause in the episode yet. Pauses are a big deal in the famously wordy Palladino scripts. It speaks volumes how little these women seem to be able to say to each other. “I’m sure I told you,” Lorelai tells her mother answering in a bit more detail about her business class. “Well if you’re sure, than you must have,” Emily bites back sarcastically. We get no answer to whether Lorelai did or not (my guess is that she didn’t), but either way we see so clearly the miscommunications that bubble up between these two who have so little faith in the other’s ability to understand the other. They don’t make this one a big fight, but it is part of the fight we will see later in the episode. Emily resents that Lorelai shuts her out of her life. Lorelai resents her mother’s controlling nature which causes her to avoid telling Emily anything rather than risk criticism or involvement in her choices. It’s a vicious cycle. Every bit of Emily’s dialogue is dripping with sardonic disbelief as she explains to Richard that Lorelai decided to just “drop in to see us” after her “business class” that “she told us about it, dear, remember?” “No.” Richard demures. He doesn’t play the same games that Emily and Lorelai do with each other. No, he doesn’t remember. This could be because he doesn’t listen, but it could also be a point in the column for the theory that Lorelai never told them.

Just this small part is enough to make this scene practically perfect. We got the back story before this for the most part in a scene between Lorelai and Sookie, but so far this has given us so much of the relationship between Lorelai and her parents (and a bit into the relationship between Richard and Emily). It soars in it’s ability to shed exposition and get to the root of what this dynamic has been for the last 16 years. It’s even better than the first Friday Night Dinner that happens towards the end of this episode, in my opinion. But now we have the discussion of money and the loan. Gilmore Girls at times handles the class dynamics between Lorelai and her parents so well it approaches Mad Men in what it is saying about whiteness and power and inherited wealth and those that reject it. Other times it is a magical place where money and finances make no sense. But that’s down the line. Here we have the simple act of a child asking their parents for money. Something many people have done with various degrees of injured pride. For some it’s easy, for Lorelai it is immensely difficult. Her saving grace is that it is for Rory, not for her, that she asks. It is interesting to note, that while Lorelai is adverse to the moneyed class her parents are in and the trappings of the white, wealthy elite she still wants her kid to have those advantages that she turned down by having Rory and leaving her parents. She still wants Harvard. She still wants Chilton. She is asking her parents for the money to buy her and Rory’s way back into the world she left behind. Of course she believes that it won’t have to affect their quaint little life in Stars Hollow, but it is interesting nonetheless that this is what she wants for her child and what she believes Rory deserves and needs in order to be what Rory wants to be.

Before Lorelai can even ask, Richard repeats two times “You need money.” Again, Richard doesn’t mess around and he doesn’t play games (at least not when it comes to calling his daughter out). He doesn’t need to hear her explanation, but Lorelai won’t leave until she gives it and says what she came to say in the way she wants to say it. It’s for Rory, for Chilton, she explains. Emily’s eyes brighten and she notes how close the school is to her house. “So…you need money,” Richard again chimes in, cutting through the bullshit. “Yes,” Lorelai has to admit. But it’s Rory, she repeats, and she will pay them back. “I don’t ask for favors, you know that.” (Lorelai’s anthem) “Oh yes, we know,” Emily admits. Emily’s voice is rife with bitterness and sadness. She wants to help her daughter, but she’s not allowed to. “I’ll get the check book,” Richard says. It is a sweet moment that is cut short by Emily’s proposal, but sweet regardless. Despite their past and hurt feelings, there is love between these people. Richard does not hesitate and he knows that Emily agrees. Rory binds them all together and certainly they are willing to do this for her, but they are obviously just as willing to do this for Lorelai.

And here we have Emily’s proposal that sets up the backbone for this generational family drama. Emily wants to be actively involved in Lorelai and Rory’s lives. She wants dinner once a week and a weekly phone call in exchange for the loan. Kelly Bishop is honestly so pitch perfect in everything in this show. She has that pose and demeanor here that seems almost villainous. It’s why on first watch you might want to always side with Lorelai. Emily is controlling and privileged and she has many faults, but honestly she just loves her daughter and granddaughter and sees an opportunity to force a connection that Lorelai would have denied her for eternity if she had not jumped on it. There is a softness in this. She doesn’t comment on Lorelai’s inability to provide this schooling for Rory herself, or honestly do anything to make her feel bad (in this moment) about her life’s choices. She just wants to be a part of that life now. Of course it gets messier the more we go into this episode and the series, but for now that’s all there is. We see again Lorelai’s pride, “I don’t want her [Rory] to know that I borrowed money from you.” But that’s not the only fault of Lorelai’s we see in this scene. We see also her stubbornness when it comes to her parents and her oftentimes inability and unwillingness to see the ways they demonstrate their love and their longing for her. She brushes past her mom’s request and agrees to the weekly dinners, but she is annoyed by it. She seems to see it only as her mother controlling her (of course it is this too, but as is often the case with the best scenes in this show people’s motives are both-and. Emily is controlling and vulnerable in this one). She doesn’t see that longing to connect as the simple love of a mother for her daughter that it is.

And that’s that. So much is revealed besides the plot in this elegantly written and brilliantly acted scene. It is simple and yet I could probably go on about how much this one scene says about this show as a whole. So much is revealed and set up for the series. Of all the iconic scenes in this episode, this one stands above the others and for that reason I think it is underrated.

#gilmore girls #gilmore #lorelai gilmore #emily gilmore #richard gilmore #tv #tvrewatch #rewatch #review #tvreview #netflix #pilot #101 #1x01 pilot

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jdumblr · 6 years

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J2 Out & About — Dec 15 to 19 2017

Relevant events:

First weekend of Supernatural end-of-the-year hiatus

Dec 15, Friday

Jensen, Austin

7:33pm CT, Jep tweets a pic with Jensen, Steve and Gino, at the Family Business Tasting Room

Dec 16, Saturday

Jensen, Austin

5:15pm CT, A fan posts a picture with Jensen at the the St Elmo Brewing Company

Jared, Austin

5:30pm CT, A fan posts a picture with Jared at the Jurassic Quest

The two venues are 10 minutes away from each other.

J2 Out & About — Dec 15 to 19 2017 🕵️‍♂️Smoke & Mirrors🕵️‍♂️ Edition

Smoke & Mirrors — the obscuring or embellishing of the truth of a situation with misleading or irrelevant information. The source of the name is based on magicians' illusions, where magicians make objects appear or disappear by extending or retracting mirrors amid a distracting burst of smoke.

From now on, you’ll have a chronological timeline of the events that set up the illusionistic trick we’ve been fed, these past few days.

Relevant events:

Thanksgiving 2017

THE PLEDGE

“The magician shows you something ordinary. A deck of cards, a bird, or a man. He shows you this object. Perhaps he asks you to inspect it. To show you that it is indeed unaltered. But of course it probably isn’t.” (x)

Nov 25, Saturday

2pm CT, Plane!Anon from Gossip posts that the Js' plane is heading back to Texas

Nov 26, Sunday (Thankgiving weekend)

Austin

The Family Business Beer IG account posts the following picture, mentioning Jep.

Take a look at the e Family Business Tasting Room, below:

Here's another picture of the same tasting room:

Keep the two pictures above in mind, you're going to need them soon.

Dec 7, Thursday

4pm CT, FBB posts a picture with Steve testing the acoustics of the place. Check his clothes and pay attention to the woman's coat.

On the same Dec 7, Lana, Steve's wife, posts a picture on a plane saying she misses someone, and answering a comment saying she's going away:

Dec 14, Thursday

The FBB IG account posts the following picture:

Did you notice the fur coat in the background? Does it look familiar? Go back a couple of pictures.

Dec 15, Friday

6:46pm CT, Jessica tweets this picture and caption, not mentioning date or place: "With the holidays comes holiday entertaining! Y'all going to some Christmas parties tonight??"

7:33pm CT, Jep tweets his picture with Jensen, Steve and Gino, implying it was taken at the same day/time. Take a look at their clothes, especially Steve's.

Remember that Lana's picture from a plane’s window on Dec 7? On Dec 15, she posts pictures of herself and a few friends. Her following pictures show her in Russia.

10:20pm CT, D posts a picture on set with M (looking hella creepy...) and tags herself in Vancouver.

But... wait a minute! Is Jensen out & about in Austin while his “wife” works in Vancouver? Shocker! No, wait! She changes the caption the morning after, tagging Jensen as the photographer.

So,Jensen has a clone in Vancouver! How interesting. Even more interesting is how everyone and their mothers were commenting how creepy and inappropriate M was looking at D in the picture... then BAM! Oops! Forgot my “husband” took the picture, of course.

Now the best thing about all that? Jensen’s comment with his usual double entendre mastery and dripping sarcasm:

D was also wearing a trench coat in that picture...

On that same Dec 15, G floods her SM with pictures (one of them with a blurred Jared in the background), ads and a pointless live stream with Shep, where three interesting things happen:

“‘Go get Jared?’ No! What about me?” — replying to a comment

“Go find dad.”

“Who just got home?” — to what a hesitant Shep timidly replies “Dad?”

“Go get your dad.” — who actually never shows

[Translation: Look, Jared is at home!... With me!]

Amidst all that, she also informs her followers she’s on her 4th day of flu, posting a picture of herself in a shirt she used for previous posts and ads. She looks surprisingly healthy, both in the picture and the livestream.

THE TURN

“The magician takes the ordinary something and makes it do something extraordinary. Now you’re looking for the secret, but you won’t find it. Because of course, you’re not really looking. Don’t really want to know. You want to be fooled. But you wouldn’t clap yet. Because making something disappear isn’t enough. You have to bring it back.” (x)

Dec 16, Saturday

Dec 17, Sunday

5:14pm CT, D posts picture of Jensen and kids with this interesting caption: “Home for the Holidays!” Texas is tagged, of course.

Dec 18, Monday

G posts a boomerang with Jared fake applying make up on her, in the kitchen, while she holds a baby... Sure, G.

Her caption:

Wow, Jared, indeed Jack of all Trades! Did you take that selfie with your 3rd arm... Or maybe 3rd leg...? Oops, sorry!

And now, Ladies & Gentlemen....

THE PRESTIGE

“The audience knows the truth…the world is simple. It’s miserable. Solid…all the way through. But if you could fool them even for a second…then you could make them wonder. And then you…then you got to see something very special.” (x)

Dec 19, Tuesday

The FBB posts the following picture:

You know this room. You know these people. Now what you don’t know is when this picture was taken... Or do you?...

Remember the picture from the Thanksgiving weekend?

What about those pictures form Dec 7 and 14?

Remember Jessica’s picture setting up a table?

I just want to know one thing: who took this wonderful picture?

But, wait! There’s someone missing at the table.... And they apparently left something behind...

Is that a... Napkin? A beanie? A napkin and a beanie?...

In case you’re still wondering, all the pictures posted above by the FBB’s and the Ducks’ SM accounts were taken on the same day, Nov 26, during the thanksgiving weekend, once Jared arrived in Austin.

Now ask yourself...

“Where were J2 while all these lategrams were being posted?”

Citations and gifs from the movie The Prestige, by Christopher Nolan. The movie is one of my favorites and a lesson in Smoke & Mirrors. I strongly recommend you to watch and rewatch it, as you will find many similarities between the movie and this post. Here’s a spolierish article with good insights on this masterpiece.

#J2 Out & About #smoke & mirrors #J2122017 #122017 #Timeline #Dec 15 to 19 2017 #FBB Tasting Room #thanksgiving 2017

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dwestfieldblog · 3 years

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Q ONAN IN THE AEON OF HORUS

Insanity is contagious in the Aeon of Horus. Hope you all had a happy and healthy Sirius day on 23rd... I wasn’t going to write another screed until late September but I might well be trapped on the festering cesspool prison island of guinea pigs in three weeks time where the oven ready Boris variant runs wild, and will have very limited access, if any, to the matrix. And I needed to rant off as catharsis on current popular topics. Arf arf arf and fnord as well.

Climate report Doom...fires, floods, earthquakes, hurricanes on the rise, watch the Texans and Arabs and all those aligned with oil continue to deny global warming in the sweating face of the evidence. The tyranny of the driller killers has been disabling those with clean solar power ideas and the mass use of limitless superconductive energy for decades, while they work out how ‘to put a metre between us and the sun’. Blame greed. Perhaps they think Bezos will have enough rockets for them to plunder other worlds and leave the future desert of earth behind. Climate change deniers usually have the same mind set as those who are anti vaxxers, it seems to be a typical item on their lists of dislike. Right alongside all the other bollocks and twaddle they don’t believe in, despite the enduring and building testimonies of the majority of professionals.

‘To prevent yourselves doing and seeing and coming into contact with this, that and the other...lock yourselves up in a monastery where you’ll be safe. Immunity...it teaches us how not to be affected by the countless vicissitudes of life; not how to avoid them by running away...The philosopher adapts himself to the exigencies of life, not the exigencies of life to himself.’ The Initiate in the New World by his pupil. Book two of a fascinating trilogy. Hello Cecil Jones.

America...the gurning evil one (‘I love the poorly educated’) doesn’t seem to be back in the White House quite yet, Q Onan and the boys can’t seem to get their insurrection up. Been there eh? White guys just take the blue tablet and avoid getting redpilled. ‘We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men evolved differently, that they are born with certain mutable characteristics, and that among these are life and the pursuit of pleasure.’ Yuval Noah Harari-Sapiens.

However, the Onan boys have exported their rabid drivel abroad...A shameful group of wannabe prophets in London a couple of weeks ago were spewing dire craziness and waves of silliness dearly wishing to become important and individualised particles by being observed and applauded. One of their brilliant ideas is that the Great Reset, New World Order of children’s adrenochrome drinking liberal reptiles will be a QUOTE’ An authoritarian socialist government run by powerful capitalists.’ UNQUOTE. Howls of derisive laughter turning into the growl of a wolf with a curled top lip and my left eye twitching for a blackout minute. When sentience returned, I was fairly sure there is no way in this lifetime of me attaining Satori while consumed by this spite. Fear and self loathing in England part 23. To attempt to counter...

Putting the con into conspiracy theories... 1. IF the vaccine is; (A. A poison to cull the overpopulated millions, that would mean that every single decent doctor and nurse in the world is in on it and not one of them is spilling the beans. Neither scenario seems plausible in any way, therefore the first premise appears to be excrement. If Covid doesn’t exist and the x rays are ALL faked (showing the difference between pneumonia, cancer and covid lungs, that also aggressively suggests a high level of implausibility. If you truly believe medical professionals are mostly freemasons and/or serving the Illuminati in the name of genocide etc, you are just a MORON. A DUNGHEADED IDIOT.

As God tweeted last month; It’s always the really dumb who make life hard for the moderately dumb.’

Drug companies and politicians have always been deeply corrupt, some would say with great justification, evil. Their foul business is as usual. But every nurse working a 16 hour shift in intensive care, do you honestly think they are doing it for the kicks to kill, for the (ha) money or to serve the Devil? Again, if Covid IS real but only the plebs are getting the bad vaccine and the here today gone tomorrow (unless they are Putin types) omnipotent holy world leaders are getting the good stuff...again this would be mighty hard to cover up. And it isn’t only the old, obese and those with ‘underlying health problems’ who are dying, teens and workers are too. No government wants to wreck its economy (apart from Brexit England) by murdering its workers, students and quarantining hundreds of thousands.

If the vaccine is a shot of death and the toll rises twice higher than it already is, governments will know that nobody will believe them the next time round when a new virus mutates...which is not good for mass control. (That said, I feel a deep grim certitude that step by blatant step, totalitarianism is coming to democracies as they realise the only way to dominate the drone masses is to do as China and Russia do.) But ‘why am I drifting into negativity’ eh?

And IF folk think the vaccine is a brain control agent by which we can be spied upon and controlled by our puppet masters via the ubiquitous spooky G5 masts, then the science of how the jab’s ingredients work (And could not possibly be activated with sound waves) should be explained in primary schools so the kids can go home and teach their elders with crayon. At the same time, the anti maskers need to watch videos (with their eyes held open (a la Clockwork Orange) of droplets in breath, the distance they travel without protection, the length of time they hang in the air and in what concentration. Humans react well to moving pictures, it might help. Yes that is dripping with rancid sarcasm. And as for those ranting that wearing masks causes illness, tell that to all the healthcare professionals of the last 100plus years who wore masks most of every bloody day, not just a couple of years. Did they all die of lung problems? I don’t have the actual statistics and I am damn sure you don’t either, so shut up and sit down. As Bill Hicks would say...

‘YOU SEE, IT MAKES NO SENSE’.

Beautiful to see so many holy men in the main religions, priests, rabbis, imans and pujari telling their flock to refuse the vaccine because it will (deep choking breath) make them impotent, gay and/or that it has cows blood and human foetuses in it. For the 23rd time, your shepherds will lead you to butchers again. Very spiritual blokes. Are any women as full of manure as this? Well actually...

One talking blonde cow on the London stage mooed about the vaccine being created by Bill ‘I think it makes sense to believe in God’ Gates, with the patent 060606, so was clearly ‘satanic’. Brilliant detective work and a rational conclusion. Except Bill didn’t formulate the vaccine and the patent was for an entirely different shot with an ACTUAL micro chip to measure if work had been completed and pay wages with Bitcoin. (Which, granted is creepy as fk, but nothing to do with Beelzebub or covid, unless you are going to bang on about none being able to buy or sell without the mark of the beast. So the antichrist is a protestant eh? I saw a video last year of an American ‘Christian’ woman blogger saying Bill was the devil, because of ‘the GATES of hell.’ That’s what we are up against and sidestepping the fk away from.

Those not vaccinated are walking time bomb laboratories of new variants. Making their own beliefs real as they will be able to say ‘See, told you the vaccine doesn’t work’. Listen to the doctors and nurses begging you.

Once yet again with even more feeling...These demonstrations of hogwash moonshine bullshit theories, mixed in with a fine blend of ahem, ‘patriotism’ are ripping the country apart. On one side the increasingly corrupt English government and their lies and on the other, the deranged and deluded with their falsehoods. An empty vessel makes the most noise and both sides are ripening the fields for populism.

Using the enemy’s own strength against them, well known to Judo black belt KGB pretty boy Putin...widening and deepening internal divisions in democracies, using the basic mistrust of half the people against their governments and encouraging it...works like a charm in times of stress/ fear/ anger. Just let them do most of the work and their own momentum will destroy them...at very least weaken them for the kill. Britain, America, Europe et al, you are being suckered and you bloody well deserve it for being so thick.

(Sidebar...By the way...Congratulations on 100 glorious years of Chinese communism and now all in the Middle Kingdom are being told, taught, trained, ORDERED to think just like Winnie the Pooh. Perfect unspoiled socialist paradise where millions wonder (as they do in most other places) ‘will there be any hunny for me?’ Unlikely...Communism doesn’t really work that way... another self righteous scam by those who seek power and to maintain their privilege. So the stick makes you keep plodding on for the promised carrot until all you believe in is the stick because it hurts and pain is real. (To greatly paraphrase Sir Terry Prachett, may he remain creative wherever he is.) )

Or...The Bilderbergers met a couple of years ago, discussed overpopulation and a threefold plan of how to deal with it...Release an airborne virus in several countries; allow it to spread for a year, Allow fear to rise. Use algorithms to predict the percentage of the obedient and those who will suspect conspiracy. When the vaccine is ‘found’ it will calm the believers for a while and enflame the rebels all the more who will look for ways to make it fit their own schemes of disbelief. This will cause a degree of expected demonstrations and rebellion...which will have the effect of enabling governments to create and quickly pass new laws on freedoms, including peaceful demonstration, to ‘protect’ the law abiding masses that need to believe all is for their own good.

The B boys talked about phased genocide, vaccines, drugs, supplies of medical equipment, government tenders to similar friends, knowing they will survive, and be well positioned to financially ride out the deaths and bankruptcies of lesser protected groups. Who they will then be able to buy out with ease and thus expand. The goldrush thrill of disaster capitalism! When all of this is (temporarily?) over, food and energy resources will be a little less stretched and/or stricter controlling laws will be in place and democracies will be far easier to control . A sadistic lack of empathy from the richest sociopaths.

There doesn’t need to be anything weird in the vaccines now, people’s minds are doing the paranoid job in their imagination, either with fear or with anger. The rich will remain rich empowering themselves with their inhuman business as usual. Populists will appear to take the side of the people as long as they are rewarded with money and power...and are allowed to join the club. All ethics and morals sacrificed for the temporary glory of pretend immortality.

This was written very quickly over a period of a couple of nights but at least it is a page shorter than usual eh? J I have to concentrate on booking tests (150 pounds in England for a PCR test is RIP OFF. Bastards. The outrageous weight of my suitcase with all my cds and books plus some pants and socks, the forlorn hope of getting a free seat or at least cheap for one of my guitars. The fear I might not be allowed back in to where I am now because the UK still seems to be Boris covid red. And Brexit and being a tourist again. Love the way the brexiteers are pissed off they will have to pay a few Euros to enter Europe as a third country citizen. The Tories voted yes to this idea in 2016 and you voted to become a third country you idiots. So now, you get to stand for a looong time in a longer queue with all the brown people you so disparage. In your nostalgic pride for something which will never be again, you have relegated England to the status of a failed state and voted for the worst government in my lifetime. You should be ashamed but you will just double down. Disgusting.

Anyway, late summer ‘holidays’ ahoy. Stay sane and in rude health...hope to see you again, spreading my cosmic rays of great happiness, comfort and joy. Outside of the insanity, keep visualising...Female male left right brain...Yin and yang let’s do our thang...

Y=01=FIRE...WANDS...ADENINE

H=00=WATER...CUPS...THYMINE

V=11=AIR...SWORDS...CYSTOSINE

H=10=EARTH...DISCS...GUANINE

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