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lynn-writes-things · 2 years

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jjk characters as types of emos

wc: 2.9k

this was a silly lil idea I had, I had way too much fun writing these lmao

mentions of nobamaki (nobara x Maki), inuokku (Inumaki x yuuta), Miwa x Mechamaru

Tokyo Kids:

Megumi Fushiguro:

- DEFINITELY HAD THE “iTs NoT a PhAsE!!1!1!!” edgy bitch boy phase (ily Megs I’m sorry)

- my chem stan first and foremost (not big on danger days tho; three cheers is his fav album)

- also waterparks and bring me the horizon

- had a BIG black veil brides phase, probably tried to style his hair like Andy biersack and did the makeup to match (but his fav member was probably Jinx if we’re being honest)

- modern day, he fucking loves corpse

- lives in hot topic + spencers every time Gojo takes him to the mall

- you know the leather chokers that kinda look like a collar but they have the spikes on them? yeah

- and the spiky bracelets? yeah 😌

- RINGS!!!!!!

- was mildly invested in creepypasta, not as much as Yuuji, but he definitely has read most the big stories (eyeless Jack is his fav)

- also Yuuji absolutely forced him to watch marble hornets and he might’ve caught feelings for Tim (didn’t we all-)

- OH I ALMOST FORGOT THIS MF WENT THROUGH THE EMO BOY WOLF OBSESSION HARDDDDDDDDD

- let’s be real here….

- it’s his greatest shame to this day, but he’s totally growled at people before

- oh he also totally went through the vampire phase

- HAS ABSOLUTELY READ THE VLADIMIR TODD SERIES

- IT WAS HIS FAVORITE SERIES

Yuuji Itadori:

- ok first of all..

- LOVED creepypasta forums, probably wrote a couple himself

- BUT this mf binge watched the entire slenderverse main ARGs on YouTube (probably watches Night Mind religiously for the in-depth coverage)

- tried to do a spin off Marble Hornets with his friends in the occult club but it didn’t work out ://

- evermanHYBRID was his favorite and now he has a major soft spot for Evan since he too is now occasionally puppeted by a scary ancient evil curse/god

- also likes buzzfeed unsolved! tries to get Megumi to go with him to haunted places cause together they’d have the Shane/Ryan dynamic

- Sleeping With Sirens stan!!

- so needless to say he also loves Pierce The Veil

- totally used to listen to Never Shout Never too

- now…. I HATE saying this…. Truly I do… but I think he would’ve been the type of guy who USED TO occasionally listen to blood on the dance floor BEFORE shit came out about them, he would’ve liked to hyperpop type beat ya know?

- he knows every single word to the phone song by JJ demon

- journey’s is his favorite store, hot topic a close second. not a super big fan of spencers tbh, I think it’d intimidate him and the sex toys would make him uncomfy

- even tho he looks like (and is) a sunshine, the emos gravitate towards him (cough cough, Megumi and Junpei) so he’s always been into all of it

Nobara Kugisaki:

- bit more scene-leanin’

- I think this goes without saying…

- Paramour stan

- has a crush on Hayley Williams (don’t we all-)

- LOVES Halestorm too and has a crush on Lyzzy (again, don’t we all-)

- listens to fit for rivals (Maki introduced her to them)

- she also really likes twenty one pilots!!!

- I feel like she’d favor Spencer’s over hot topic, but she also shops at journeys

- idk I think she’s the type to claim hot topic is TOO mainstream/for posers/etc (but if Maki wants to go, suddenly she’s never loved a store more)

- jelly bracelets of her favorite bands

- TOTALLY had the scene kid neon arm fishnet glove things ya know?

- PON AND ZI COMICS

- “I made you a cookie 😊…… but I eated it😞”

- not super into creepypasta stuff but she PROBABLY read at least some creepypasta x reader fanfics on specifically quotev

- GIR BACKPACK GIR BACKPACK GIR BACKPACK

- tried to learn how to skateboard to impress Maki

- it didn’t really work, but Maki did give her some cool bandaids

- peach monster ONLY

Maki Zenin:

- controversial… hello kitty obsessed emo

- she had the stickers, the bandaids, probably even a purse/backpack

- black veil brides stan!! used to make fun of megumi for dressing up like Andy, but let’s be real, she helped him do the makeup

- I think her fav member would be CC (girl has taste)

- fit for rivals stan also

- she found the Damage music video on YouTube and became a fan of all their music real quick

- has a crush on Renee Phoenix (don’t we all-)

- I think she’d like the slenderverse ARG’s a reasonable amount, not like Yuuji tho

- not big into creepypasta, but she’s read Jane the killer, and probably cosplayed her at LEAST once

- Spencers > hot topic, not a fan of journeys

- flirts with nobara through pon and zi comics

- ALSO went through the vampire phase big time, Megumi got her into the Vladimir Todd series and she borrowed all of his books

- her biggest shame is that she’s read My Immortal and actually didn’t hate it

- homestuck fan!!

- monster energy emo

- I think she could rock a snapback ngl

- skateboards, she’s pretty good at it, not as good as Toge tho

- has a collection of cute bandaids, ranging from basic neon ones, to designs, to characters (has several boxes of hello kitty ones)

- (it is a high honor for her to share the hello kitty ones)

- (this is an honor that nobara is lucky enough to receive)

Toge Inumaki:

- eyeliner!!!!!!!

- does he know what he’s doing? not fuckin’ really, but it works out for him

- probably tries to make his eyes look darker underneath cause he wants to look perpetually tired and depressed like Yuuta

- has absolutely done purple frosted tips before

- you think he was allowed to buy the hair dye to do it? fuck no, he used sharpie and made Yuuta or Panda help him

- paints his nails, I’m thinking black and a purple accent nail

- also wears rings, but daintier ones than Megumi wears

- three days grace stan tbh

- other fav bands include: asking alexandria, falling in reverse, waterparks, the maine, pierce the veil, sleeping with sirens, etc

- my point is, he’s a big time music emo

- he can’t really talk, so he listens to a lot of shit, constantly

- his and Yuuta’s song is black butterflies and deja vu by the maine :))

- skateboards!! he’s really good at it :)

- Yuuta was SO impressed

- shops at Spencers mostly, but if he’s in a mall, he’s usually hanging around the food court trying to look cool (and dragging his friends to chill there with him)

- SUPER into creepypasta, he’s on the same level as Yuuji

- his fav is Ben Drowned

- so obviously he did the cleverbot shit religiously

- did the whole monster tab thing to Yuuta (the KISS one, these are PG headcanons today bitches)

Yuuta Okkatsu:

- “yOu DoNt UnDeRsTaNd My PaIn!!1!11!!!” whenever something minor goes wrong type bitch

- shy boi

- clings to Maki in public cause she always stands up for him

- Maki and Toge have absolutely beaten up bullies for him

- wears chokers!!

- sometimes he borrows rings from Toge

- fall out boy emo

- actually, scratch that, he was big into the fabled 2013 tumblr “holy emo trinity” of fall out boy, panic at the disco, and my chem

- “I’m Not Okay (I Promise)” is his anthem

- not into creepypasta really, but he’ll watch/read whatever Toge shows him

- Maki’s homestuck buddy

- watches Dan and Phil!!!

- I also feel like he’d watch markiplier

- FNAF stan (also got Toge into it)

- as far as stores go, he prefers hot topic

- he’s like Yuuji, Spencer’s intimidates him (but he’ll go in with Toge or Maki if they want to)

- literally LIVES off of caffeine, fruit punch Rockstar is his fav drink

- he’s read the Vladimir Todd books, but tbh I think he’d be more of a werewolf guy

- idk man

- cried watching twilight and this is a fact no one lets him live down

- did not understand the monster tab proposal, but when it was explained, this boy combusted (but absolutely did give Toge a kiss)

- this became their thing :)

- also!!! he doodles!!!! he gives himself and his friends sharpie “tattoos”

- let’s Toge paint his nails 🥹

Kyoto Kids:

Momo Nishimiya:

- only mildly emo tbh

- goes without saying, but

- witchcraft emo

- got that 2014 tumblr witchy aesthetic

- sleeping with sirens stan

- supernatural stannnn

- this is canon tho right?

- Halsey stan!!!! taste!!!

- absolutely reads homestuck

- zodiac OBSESSED

- hot topic shopper

- jelly bracelets!!!!

- invader zim fan, has a lot of gir merch

- fake tattoos, 100%

- really really good at gothic makeup

- her fav thing to do is a big batwing liner paired with black or purple lipstick

- watches Dan and Phil, probably ships them tbh

- not into slenderverse ARG’s, but she’s subscribed to Night Mind and watches his explained series on other ARG’s

- don’t hug me I’m scared

- also?? I think she’d like FNAF

- it would scare her, she’d have to watch it with Mai and maybe also Miwa, but I think she’d enjoy it

- oh oh oh, totally gives herself fake (and real) piercings

- buzzfeed unsolved with the homies

Mai Zenin:

- CONTROVERSIAL… BUT!!!

- she at least USED to listen to Die Antwoord

- had a weird crush on Yolandi (I might be projecting)

- I’m dying on this hill, fuck you

- secretly very into creepypasta but hides it from everyone

- the concept of her and Maki having the same favorite band is too funny for me to pass up, but I do also genuinely think she’d love Fit For Rivals

- to throw an even rarer band into the mix, she listens to Icon For Hire

- bring me the horizon stan

- shops exclusively at Spencer’s

- not a skateboarder, but she rollerblades

- I can see her wearing snapbacks, I think it’d look good

- either has or wanted gauges

- watches buzzfeed unsolved with the other Kyoto kids

- proooobably used to watch Brian Starz interviews before.. ya know

- used to watch jeffree star makeup tutorials before, ya know

- fruit punch monster for the winnnnn

- she does stick and poke tattoos!!

Aoi Todo:

- no emo energy, sorry

- I think if anything the MOST he’d classify is that his gym playlist is full of metal music

- MAYBE got a tattoo from Mai

Noritoshi Kamo:

- “yOu WoUlDn’T uNdErStAnD 🙄”

- MY BOY IS A MY CHEM STANNNNNNN

- has to keep it all secret cause of clan stuff

- wears eyeliner, looks damn good in it

- CHAINSSSS

- neck chains, finger chains, belt chains, etc

- his ears are pierced shhhh

- he did them himself with a safety pin

- loves corpse, probably has a lil bond with Megumi about it

- Spencers > hot topic, but still shops at both, not big on journeys

- wants so many piercings, but alas…

- let Mai give him a tiny tattoo somewhere that’s easy to hide

- SUPER into vampires

- he had fun with his cursed technique when he got into vampires lmao

- not real into energy drinks, but he likes coffee

- sometimes he’s been known to nurse a plain monster to look cool

- this man…. writes slam poetry

- probably posts it online under a pseudonym

- he just has too many feelings and he is not allowed to express any of them :((

- wants to dye the tips of his hair red, but he’s not allowed :(

- part of the unsolved club

- creepypasta fan, his fav is ticci toby

- has ABSOLUTELY read My Immortal at some point

- gets upset if someone teases him about it

- he strikes as the type who has read every single goosebumps book in middle school (and honestly, same, good for him)

Kasumi Miwa:

- scene kid!! look at those bangs and tell me otherwise!

- “rawr XD” type beat babey

- Pon and Zi comics @ Gojo (who does not get it)

- but also @ Kokichi (who does get it)

- wants to be edgier, but alas, she is a sunshine

- Never Shout Never fan

- also really likes sleeping with sirens

- likes my chem but danger days is her fav album (she also read all the comics)

- Journeys > hot topic, spencers scares her

- super into creepypasta and slenderverse ARG’s!!!

- her and Yuuji probably talk about them together tbh

- FNAF fan!! probably got Momo into it, consequently also got Mai into it

- she LOVED homestuck

- totally read My Immortal, unironically enjoyed it

- tumblr kid through and through

- probably got super into Superwholock

- also probably watches let’s plays, specifically markiplier and achievement hunter (Gavin is her fav, she misses Ray ((don’t we all-))

- Danganronpa fan!!!

Kokichi Muta:

- I’ll be honest here I do not have a strong grasp on his character so bear with me here cause I know damn well he belongs on this list

- possibly the top of it

- rivals Megumi for top emo

- creepypasta fan ofc, needs something to read

- probably came up with his own, either posted it in the forums or he just wrote his own creepypasta oc fanfics

- Miwa introduced him to Danganronpa, he got super into it

- they play it together :))

- doesn’t shop :// but he’ll go along with his friends if they want to go

- wears a bracelet that Miwa made him 24/7 (its matching, they have little pon and zi charms 🥹)

- read homestuck, wasn’t super into it

- really likes being included in the buzzfeed unsolved nights!!

- similar to Toge, he listens to like… everything

- is it mean if I say his favorite song is I Am Machine-

Now onto the elder emos:

Suguru Geto:

- in his early years he 1000000% was similar to Megumi with the “iTs NoT a PhAsE” phase

- chilled out with age

- (still listens to the same music tho)

- probably worked at Spencer’s tbh

- he really likes my chem!!! Frank is his fav

- also listens to a lot of Franks other bands (Leathermouth was his fav)

- three days grace is his shit tho

- also big into Green Day!

- tbh I think he listened to a lot of dragonforce for awhile

- butterfly knife skills for dayyyysssss

- HAS teased the shit out of his hair at least once in THOSE days

- honestly he probably had a raccoon tail in his hair at some point or another

- the gauges are a given, mf still has them and wears them proudly

- paints his nails black!! sometimes with a red accent

Satoru Gojo:

- not super on this list, he ain’t super emo, might’ve had a teensy bit of a scene phase

- If you’re wondering where Megumi learned to growl at people tho it’s bc Gojo barks

- you read that right, this mf barks at people

- still does

- makes fun of everyone for their taste in music, even though he also listens to some of it

- makes fun of Suguru WHILE BEGGING TO LISTEN TO HIS MUSIC WITH HIM

- steals all Suguru’s band tees, past and present

Kento Nanami:

- has grown out of his emo phase

- every now and then he falls back into the music tho

- DEFINITELY was a my chem stan, super invested

- knew he wanted kids after watching them become parents

- edge lord extreme in his youth, love that for him 🖤

- has the intro dialogue to I’m Not Okay memorized

- he got caught by Suguru while sneaking out of school one night to go to some punk rock concert

- Suguru gave him a ride cause he was also on his way to the same concert

- had the leather spikey bracelets and matching choker like Megumi, gets WHIPLASH when he sees Megumi rocking the same shit years later

- fills him with pride tbh

- he listens to what The Kids are listening to these days, out of curiosity

- doesn’t hate it

- tbh he’s just happy watching the young emos do their thing

- has probably caught SOME of them sneaking out to go to a concert

- obviously drove them himself and told them to call him if they needed a ride back

- protector of the future emos 🖤

Shoko Ieri:

- we’re here for a good time not a long time vibes

- listens to a lot of the maine

- loves halestorm, has a crush on Lyzzy Hale

- has smacked Gojo for making fun of her music taste before and will do it again

- regularly jams out with Suguru

- used to work at Spencers with him, probably stole some stuff and got fired

- piercings!!!

- had her tongue pierced

- probably briefly had her septum pierced too but it got infected from all her smoking and she was too stubborn to quit so she just took it out instead

- I bet… I BET she has her nipples pierced, hot bitch shit ya know?

- honestly probably got them done at the same time as Utahime on a dare

- she doesn’t show it much but seeing the current students getting into the scene makes her happy

- makes her remember all the shit they used to get up to when they were students

- quite literally survives off of peach redbull

- she mixed it with her coffee one day and the boys kept joking that she was a bad example as a doctor

- SILLY BANDS!!!!!!!!!!! The boys steal them from her all the time

Choso Kamo:

- MY LOVE!!!!

- HUGE my chem stan, three cheers is his fav album

- thank you for the venom is his favorite song

- asking alexandria is another of his favs

- likes bring me the horizon too

- Yuuji showed him modern emo bands, he showed Yuuji old emo bands in return

- caught Yuuji in one of his old band tees once, literally gave him some and made him listen to at least one song from every band

- smokes cigs cause he’s old enough to do so

- not too big on energy drinks but can be found drinking coffee nonstop

- HAS SO MANY CHAINS BRO

- has a choker that looks a lot like a dog collar

- call me crazy but I think he could rock a bridge piercing if he wanted to

- pretty rings that will hurt like hell if he punches you while wearing them, do not mess with his brothers 🖤

- smudged eyeliner and black lipstick has ALWAYS been his fav look, probably blends a bit of purple in the middle

- also purple eyeshadow

- black nail polish!!

- overall just sweet elder emo who will protect Yuuji and his friends from anyone who tries to get in their way

#jjk #megumi fushiguro #yuuji itadori #nobara kugisaki #maki zenin #inumaki toge #yuuta okkotsu #momo nishimiya #mai zenin #todo aoi #kokichi muta #noritoshi kamo #miwa kasumi #gojo satoru #geto suguru #choso kamo #shoko ieiri #nanami kento

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glendover · 2 years

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watch ghost files with me eps. 2

or watch the second episode with me <33

ALCATRAZ BABY

(you would think I know any of these places but my European ass could never I only know them through buzzfeed unsolved 💀)

actually the intro gives me ghostbusters vibes

who you gonna call? GHOST FILES!

(well that sounded way better in my head)

I mean Ryan you could always try and swim away

by daylight the island doesn’t even look that bad, I wouldn’t get spooked there

taking that back now that it’s dark 💀

bro I’m still not over the high quality of this show the budget must be so high

like good for them, I’m soooo happy

THE BLUEPRINT

the ‘the rock’ comment lmao

honestly the prison looks kinda fancy like okay

“… bc I hate myself.” It’s okay Ryan we all hate ourselves here

no shit Sherlock in the shower room you shower what a strange concept that is/j

can you imagine showering and then just getting stabbed to death, that must be one of the worst deaths frfr

showering with the ghosts <3

spirit box my beloved!!

why is the spirit box kinda working this time and not saying some random bullshit between plausible answers??

i don’t like the photo lmao, it’s really unsettling even if it were photoshopped

fondle the pod 😠

cell block tango or whatever

not Shane expecting sexy evidence 💀

“I don’t want to die.”

“And watch everyone you’ve ever loved die?” “How do you know I haven’t already done that?”

you know what maybe Ryan is the demon after all 😃

Bernard is trying, my man, give him some time

not the footsteps 😃

“World’s finest” - not the ghosts always trying to flirt with Ryan (I mean same but 💀)

not the ghost fucking with Ryan lmao

the disembodied voices tho

“yEaH 👺👺👺”

well if anyones scared then it’s you Ryan so I guess they are talking about you 🥴

now that’s a tragic love story

okay the blood licking kinda ruined it I’m taking back what I said

a jealous rage murder 👀👀

or maybe blinded by passion

“We’ve got a barber?” - why is that so funny to me 💀

purple faced fella!!

not Ryan being self aware that he will lose his mind as soon as he has to do solo investigations 💀

why is Ryan always oversharing before solo investigations

he be sitting there and suddenly he goes “I’m scared of seeing ghosts, I’m scared I die, I’m scared Shane will find me dead, I’m scared of the future.”

like baby girl calm down you’ll be fine

and Shane is in the building all sad boy hours bc he’s asking for ghosts to hang out with him but yet again no one showed up

you know what the sink face looks like? It’s this emoji 🤖

but also this guy

non of the ghosts are taking responsibility for what happened to that toilet - the silence is so loud lmao

Shane “ghost hunter” Madej: I do all of this to see historical sites without all the tourists

not someone screaming on Ryan’s solo investigation 💀

tho I have to say it sounded like a bird or something

not Shane predicting that Ryan is muttering his little mantra and then it cuts to Ryan muttering his mantra

AND THAT WAS ALCATRAZ

that’s now locked away in the ghost files

#ghost files #watch ghost files with me #ryan amd shane #ryan bergara #shane madej #ghoul boys

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girlaskew · 3 years

Note

Hi hope your day was/is going well! Are there any youtubers you like?

Hii, my day went alright. thank you❣️

To be honest I don’t really watch youtube my history is mostly clips of the nanny. If I had anyone in mind that I’m really into it would be @/ cherry bepsie and @/ yhara zayd. I feel like they both create super interesting and well thought-out video essays. @/ Broey deschanel is also a good account! Really makes me excited ab media and they always have such a unique take.

Those are the only “youtubers” I can think of though. I do follow skincare/ book review accounts as well but lol.

#also the buzzfeed unsolved guys I don’t even watch them #just love the energy

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lokislytherin · 2 years

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luxiem/noctyx plot bunnies

do i know where i’m going with these? no! will i ever write them? probably! have these ideas grabbed me by the foot and refused to let go? absolutely

once again i treat them all as ocs, and there is no shipping! only chaotic flirting

this city’s chaotic at night

if there's something strange in your neighborhood, who're you gonna call? mysta rias, ghost detective!

ike and shu are actually more reliable bc ike actually goes through with stuff even if he’s scared and shu is, as always, shupport

vox is too much of a ghost magnet maybe he believes in 风水 and superstition stuff? not a demon here tho

luca probably carries a camera around and goes POG at every ‘ghost’ like he’s on buzzfeed unsolved

mysta gets bri’ish debuff: cue “YOUWHOHAUNTTHISPLACEINTHENAMEOFTHELORD” speed rap

but he’s actually good at finding ghosts

no plot as of now but i think it’s gonna be long

devil’s kitchen

5+1 things, platonic foxakuma cooking

i lied it’s mysta’s cooking fails and other shocking shenanigans

possibly hitd verse, possibly not, doesn’t really matter

is it a crack fic if it’s based off reality tho. im returning to my roots as Funni Writer

no romance, only disaster! the 1 thing is mysta actually making something good

die-suki

assassin/writer friendship but it’s mafia boss luca and murder mystery novelist ike + neighbors au

mysta, yugo and sonny probably live in the same apartment block for maximum chaos

luca: that’s kinda an unrealistic way to die, [provides exact knowledge on how to kill the person, how long it takes to bleed out, pain levels etc]

ike: yeah ok cool cool!

ike, hours later: WAIT A MIN. HOW’D HE KNOW

maybe there’s a real killer out there killing people based on ike’s novels and mysta and sonny are like IT’S IKE. and ike’s like NO IT’S NOT ME but they don’t even think of suspecting luca

maybe rias is the one doing the killing who knows

niji 99

cop au with all of niji EN, but more of the boys because i haven’t watched enough of the girls’ content to get their personalities right but they exist in the au! like in hitd!

more of a series with individual ficlets with certain member pairings i think would be fun

sonny working in the cybercrime dpt as per canon, mysta’s probably a private detective? i really do not think he would get past police skl (physical skill debuff rip) but i know sonny definitely would! best boy punched his commissioner and commissioner flat out fainted

solar power

sonny but he’s a literal glowstick

he got glowstick juice in his veins when he cracks his joints they glow, his hair also glows in the dark on demand

it’s gonna be a CRACK fic (get it? get it? hehe :D)

maybe it’s lore? maybe it’s with noctyx in a black out? who knows

WHAT IF IT WAS A BNHA AU. SONNY SAID HE THINKS MARTIAL ARTS ARE COOL SO WHAT IF I COMBINED SONNY + GLOWING + GUN + MARTIAL ARTS. ULTIMATE COOL SONNY.

if bnha, then would feature other niji members! psychic quirk uki ‘starfall’ violeta being luca kaneshiro’s biggest fanboy

i’m planning this already it’s gonna be a really big au stay tuned for more!

spider brisko

*slaps sonny* why do i have so many fics for you. dzamn

but anyway! spiderman sonny au! idk about any of the other noctyx members but spiderman sonny!

instead of being bitten by a radioactive spider, he ate it

his Special Spider Skill is being able to make glowing webs

it’s gonna have lots of ass kicking! martial artist sonny arc! and webslinger!

YOO WHAT IF IRON MAN FUU. HE’S A CYBORG ANYWAY. HE CAN LIVE AFTER BEING DECAPITATED BC HIS ARC REACTOR THING IS IN HIS NECK. IDK HOW THAT WORKS BUT LORE YK

yooooo what if scarlet witch uki. the violet powers. ridiculously op uki in mib au n spiderbrisko au. ridiculously op uki ABSOLUTELY LOSING IT

also designated Guy In The Chair yugo. he’s like ‘no i am absolutely NOT being third wheel out in the open. also i want to stay safe’

alban is probably phantom thief relying on his own creations and stuff

when sonny webs alban up after a crime alban is like KYAA- actually. tskr

battle of the brisbros

hero!moony + villain!sonny

they’re estranged twins, kinda like briskotome but with superpowers

what if. what if i merged this with spiderbrisko. moony deadpool. unkillable

sonny aesthetic: bright yellow cape, looks like a hero, has a pet

moony aesthetic: black black black, harnesses, knives and grappling hook

MOONY LOOKS LIKE BATMAN? OR CHAT NOIR FROM MIRACULOUS LADYBUG? how to give him Drip

angst. people asked for angst n i Will deliver. i Can write angst

what’s up, danger?

sonny with sukuna!moony + fulgur with venom!legatus

fic working title is from spiderman: into the spiderverse soundtrack but we’re not going to talk about that right now

otaku weeb and fudanshi team up to beat evil with the power of chuuni!

legatus and moony get along Really Well because ovisko are too cringe

sonny is feral gremlin, venom!moony is essentially his impulse control

sonny, developing his own curse techniques: KAMEHAMEHAAAAAA

sukuna!moony, stuck in mental bone hell: I Hate My Life. Why Did I Lend This Boy My Powers. I Want Out But He Keeps Me Alive And I Don’t Want To Die.

meanwhile venom!legatus: i would almost rather go back to the lab and get dissected again than stay here and watch this human read danmei

they’re literally like

mcdonalds guy: what do you want

moony and legatus: THE SOULS OF THE INNOCENT

sonny: BETTER POWERS

fulgur, sighing: four burgers. please. thank you

fulgur is the brain and backbone of the group everybody say thank you to mr ojisanji

lucidity

once again i am rearranging an og story to fit a fandom bc i lost characterization of my ocs and i think this could be fun to write

it’s like dreams merging with reality? kinda? it’s like lucid dreaming but what happens in your dreams can also affect reality, so like if you get your ass kicked really bad in a dream you get bruised in reality and stuff

which is kinda like. peak sonny material since he loves lucid dreaming and time stopping powers and stuff

i might expand this later with more plot and oc -> niji because i have ideas on character aesthetics and plotlines and stuff and i SWEAR i wrote it down somewhere but. doko. i lost the plot draft and my story draft has chapter 1 and chapter 1 is a blank page

anyway! mc sonny, he’s just a Regular Ass Dude who likes lucid dreams

until he bumps into Pro Battle Dreamer uki who’s like a well trained fighter and stuff

they have a secret dream organization everyone has special in-dream powers

fulgur is human in reality but his dream form is cyborg

since i’m changing this to niji i’m not too sure what the plot is now

but i planned on one of my ocs to betray the main gang because Evil Dude is threatening to kill their s/o

Evil Dude’s child is also a good guy who’s been gatekept gaslit all their life

more after exams

this isn’t really a priority since i might keep it to being an og story thing but i just think sonny having timestop dream powers would be neat

tower of god au? minor spoiler warning

i do not know where this is going i just thought ‘wouldn’t it be neat to have legatus 505 as 25th bam with all the workshop stuff’

also coz tog is one of my Big Big fandoms! The fandom i cannot escape from! the fandom i adore the most because that’s where a lot of my online friends are from! also there is magic and magic pog

idk if the 10 great families would exist in this au and it would be cool if they did but at the same time i would have to tweak v and arlene’s names to fit fulgur ovid

yugo: spear bearer! he got them arms exposed for a reason!

alban: scout! he’s also an anima from the lo po bia family but probably not part of the main branch? maybe like khun where he’s a sub-branch family member and when he left the family he just stole a giant cat (like yasratcha’s cat) and now has a massive bounty on his head! all hail tower’s mightiest phantom thief lo po bia alban knox

sonny: fisherman! physical fights bam bam kick punch woo go beat em regulars and rankers up baby! what if he was part of the ha family branch for the fighting skills + ha yuri jahad is loml... but ha sonny brisko sounds awk ngl maybe he can be extended family

uki: wave controller + guide? maybe? if that’s possible? maybe a red witch ran away with a khun family member so we end up with uki who has purple hair + red witch powers + insanely talented shinsu user

fulgur: light bearer! he starts off learning how to use a lighthouse, and then gets betrayed by vulpes (probably, sorry jojo) and experimented on in the workshop and made to be a legatus for fug (like bam being slayer candidate, but prof canis is jinsung? maybe? maybe not? gotta reread the lore)

HELL YEAH THIS MEANS WE HAVE SOMEONE FOR EACH POSITION!

i might not write this because it means i have to big brain so much for any parts covering post s1 of tog bc it’ll be so hard to link legatus 505 lore to tog

but at the same time this sounds like a really interesting idea i might do a fic for s1 bc i believe in insanely op uki violeta supremacy

more coming when i think of ideas!

i created a new sonny fic tag just for me bc he doesn’t seem like he’ll come up with one any time soon and this is pretty smart i think: BRISTORY! brisko stories hehe

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starburstman · 2 years

Text

Sing Headcanons

This one is gonna be kinda long

- so as humans I hc that Rosita and Ash are latina (however Rositas kids don't speak spanish), Meena is black, Johnny is British Pakistani, Nooshy is East Asian, Gunter is European, Buster is aboriginal and Eddies family is also black

- It’s a fact that Elephants tread really lightly so sometimes, Meena will walk in behind someone and they may not notice at first. It’s basically this scene from the office (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x03V4cTXNF4&ab_channel=mbalallo)

- Rosita was a total BAMF. She was basically Maeve Wiley. Total overachiever and total badass in highschool (wouldn’t hesitate to light some dudes car on fire if he was a jerk)

- Eddie and Ash love buzzfeed unsolved so basically, they forced the gang to go to a haunted house/famous haunted site and whilst everyone was close to crying they were acting like they were on the show

Ash: FUCK YOU GOATMAN

Eddie: DON’T TRY IT DEMONS (brings out water gun filled with holy water)

- Meenas mom and Rosita are best friends. THEY ARE LITERALLY MAUREEN AND JEAN FROM SEX EDUCATION (search them up they are the best). Big Daddy (Marcus) was a bit reluctant around them at first but now he goes with them to a book club every week.

- Norman was this nerd and Rosita was weirdly overprotective of him at first and BOOM they developed feelings for eachother

- Nooshy quickly became friends with everyone BUT ASH AND HER GO OFF THE RAILS

Nooshy: iM GONNA COMMIT A CRIME

Ash: YES

Meena: *crying* I am going to have a heartattack

- Surprisingly, Nooshy is a great cook and helps Meena when she bakes (besties T-T)

- JOHNNY AND NOOSHYS FRIENDSHIP IS SO GOOD BUT ALSO KINDA VIOLENT?? She shoves him, fake punches him, almost choked him once

- Alfonso goes by he/they pronouns, also HE IS A MAN THAT WAS WRITTEN BY A WOMAN. Breaking down Toxic Masculinity one day at a time. Very sweet to Meena but Ash and Johnny would never give him a break

- HUMAN! Alfonso had alot of sisters so naturally he knows how to do hair and paint nails really well :D

- they truly began trusting him and liking him when he calmed Meena down from a panic attack before a show started (because sadly anxiety doesn’t go away after a few performances)

- Buster is quite a picky eater but he uses eucalyptus to get high XD He also genuinely believes he can do PARKOUR, but has ended up with almost broken bones on multiple occasions

- Outside of music, alot of the characters have hobbies. Meena can rollerskate amazing, Johnny writes poetry, Nooshy can cook and did gymnastics as a kid, Rosita is a tinkerer at heart and Porshia did alot of ballet dancing

- Ash loves crafts. She is extremely creative as she knows how to sew and design, and she love to sketch and paint. She has made bracelets for alfonso and Meena, and even stuff for Porsha

- For Meena’s father, I headcanon that he was a pretty awful dad, putting down Meena and her mother and basically stuffing a load of trauma into the girl until her mother and him divorced. In this scenario he contributed to her anxiety surrounding singing and putting herself out there

- The humor of the “teens” (including Porsha and Nooshy) is broken af

“Watch your elbow!”

“Watch your lifespan”

- Ash has 3 sisters, shes the middle child and has a rocky relationship with her parents. Mainly due to lack of attention and their dislike in her new lifestyle

- Meena has serious scary punching skills but only Johnny and Ash know this. Once Lance and this creeper friend of his came to bother Ash. Needless to say, the situation ended in black eyes, bruises and Johnny holding a very furious Meena back.

- Meena is very strong guys, she can lift many people.

- Darius and Meena become besties outside of rehearsals. Their best friend dynamic is basically this photo:

- Gunter gives best hugs and he can really tone down the ecstatic behaviour if someone is in trouble. He used to be really insecure about everything but he has learnt to accept himself

- Rosita and Gunter be besties in and outside of rehearsals. Rosita has considered walking Gunter around on a leash multiple times however based on the way he will sprint to every single store on the block.

- SEXUALITY HEADCANONS: (Btw these are my headcanons so if you don't agree its fine!) Nooshy and Johnny are bi, Meena is pan (don’t tell me this girl isn’t she has pan panic every single day), Buster and Eddie are dating, Gunter is gay and nonbinary, Porsha and Ash are lesbians (she was still in the closet when she dated Lance)

- Porshia and Ash used to fight all the time at first (because Porsha was still pretty snobbish and Ash hated that) so Ash would always use Meena to gain height over her (I HAVE THE HIGH GROUND) They became friends later on through a theater accident

- People have a hard time scaring Meena, because she can hear them from a mile away but when she does get scared, she lets out a small trumpet

- HUMAN!! Meena is amazing at doing hair (she kinda needs to be)

- Ash refuses to sleep because she will work on her songs for hours, often having to be dragged to her bed by one of her friends and they need to monitor her so she doesn’t go back to work. She hogs the blanket tho

- Ash and Johnny share an apartment and Meena is coming over for sleepovers 24/7

- Porshia struggled for a long time after her dad went to jail. It was really hard on her

- Johnny = constantly bullied by his friends (they still love him)

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artistfingers · 3 years

Note

Okay I cannot express how much I love your undercover au, it is PERFECTION

I also couldn’t stop thinking about more potential fenton-phantom connections drawn by Sam and Tucker, and their shenaniganery. So, assuming Danny did the whole time-travel dealio here with the infi-map or similar, I’m just imagining Sam and Tucker (mainly Sam) being utterly confused because everything else points to Phantom being more recently dead — his clothes, his speech, astronaut career, etc. So Sam is just [insert cork board conspiracy meme here] because these ancient scripts describe Phantom way too accurately. Could it be that Phantom had ghost relatives — “is that even a thing Sam?” — or is he actually that old? — “what if it was time travel?” “Hush Tucker this is the goth realm not sci-fi” — and they are basically certain Phantom is a modern ghost, how else could he be connected to Fenton?, but still somehow coming to every conclusion except the right one regarding the Phantom-in-the-past stuff.

Also I’m imagining Sam and Tucker investigating haunted houses or something, perhaps trying to take a load of Phantom’s shoulders, or because they’re now into the supernatural. Maybe they drag Fenton along because “we must educate him on the ways of ghosting”. So Sam and Tucker are just doing the whole Buzzfeed Unsolved gig, not letting Fenton out of their sight because “ah novice” while Danny tries to sneakily fight the invisible demon in the background that human eyes can’t see while pretending nothing is wrong. (“This is what is known as a summoning circle, it summons demons.” [Danny, acting like he’s leaning against a wall while really trying to non-conspicuously choke a demon] “You don’t say”. — “these demons are wimps! Oh, Danny did you fall again?” [Danny, having “tripped” in order to pin a demon from tackling Tucker/Sam]. “Yep, tripped, that’s exactly what happened”)

[Undercover AU]

Ahdjhfds omFG. All of this. Sam and Tuck trying to educate “novice” Danny Fenton on the supernatural is comedy GOLD. And Sam with her conspiracy corkboard because all of her work penciling in a timeframe for Phantom's life and death has just imploded with this rouge element of ancient descriptions of Phantom—plus, them realizing he’s a modern ghost reminds me of this conversation I had with @dp-belongs-in-a-hoodie the other day so please enjoy their huge brain—

Kei: I was looking at you recent posts and read the one about Sam slowly compiling facts Abt Phantom to figure out when he died and I just takajalsjaos maybe super early on one of the lil hints is just how well versed Phantom seems to be in modern/internet slang

~ something good happens ~

Phantom: o shit, pog

Sam and Tucker: ???????

Phantom : sweats I uh... I watch twitch streams on my phone. You know. My phone you guys remember my phone. Being a ghost, I have a lot of time to kill haha!!!! finger guns

Also,,, I was thinking about how you can reverse search a phone number and find out who it's registered to (or the name on the phone plan and what carrier) ,,,,,, can you imagine if Sam and Tuck searched Phantoms phone number and found out it was registered to the Fenton's ???

Phantom panicking : oKAY. you caught me..... I,,,,, stole,,, Danny Fenton's phone awhile ago,,,

Art: Akdjdjdkd but them finding out Phantom has fenton’s phone makes them go “oh that tracks” because Danny had lied as fenton that he didn’t have a phone. so there’s a moment where they’re just nodding and then it’s like. “WAIT. GIVE IT BACK”

Kei: Danny internally just like : holy fuck I actually got away with that??????

also have this piece of pure unadulterated gamerspeak

Kei: Phantom talking abt something cool he did in the past: yeah, but dude no cap, it was based as hell

Tucker: Kekw

Sam: if either of you start fortnite dancing I'm leaving

#danny phantom #sam manson #tucker foley #quasar-crew #dp-belongs-in-a-hoodie #undercover phantom au #no one knows au #ask #anon #THANK YOU BTWWWW IM SO GLAD YOURE ENJOYING ALL THEIR HIJINNKKS #sam and tuck taking fenton to a haunted house at the start of their friendship would be a hugely hilarious one-shot/short comic #also honestly also the moment when phantom says he stole fenton's phone lmFAO #Undercover Asks

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dinosaurtsukki · 4 years

Text

haikyuu!! buzzfeed unsolved AU

OK THIS IS THE LAST BUZZFEED UNSOLVED RELATED HEADCANON SET I PROMISE

[edit: check out the link at the bottom of the post for more buzzfeed unsolved au content :)]

hinata and kageyama:

90% of the show is them yelling and nobody watches it with earphones on

both of them believe in ghosts but that doesn't mean they want to see one

hinata will literally go to the bathroom five times before going to the spooky house and kageyama gets mad at him for it but there is Fear in his eyes

producer: 'were you scared?'

kageyama: 'pfft, no'

cameraman: *points camera down to show that kageyama's legs are shaking*

they also bring a shit ton of food with them when they stay the night at a place and they'll deadass be eating while talking about the history of the place

‘this house *crunch crunch* was built in *crunch crunch* 1972'

the producers tell them to stop bringing snacks but fans of the show love it

sometimes they'll shoot a mini mukbang video

SPICY, BARBECUE POTATO FRIES | Mukbang at the Waverly Hills Asylum'

hinata: *looking up how to do a seance on wikihow* it says we gotta offer some food for the spirit

kageyama: *spills the doritos he was eating on the table

*after 20 minutes*

kageyama: fuck this

hinata: *starts eating the doritos*

producer: ...

the ghosts: ..................the, audacity

tsukishima and yamaguchi

pretty much a ryan and shane duo right here

yamaguchi: we'll be visiting this place as part of our ongoing investigation on the question, are ghosts real?

tsukishima: *shakes head*

yamaguchi just wants to see the look of fear in tsukishima’s eyes at least once

yamaguchi: *hears a random thump sound* fUCk tSuKkI a gHoSt!!!

tsukishima: *sees a chair being tossed across the room* huh, the wind is pretty strong today

he likes to stick his head into attics to scare yamaguchi

yamaguchi always carries a water gun full of holy water

yamaguchi: i have holy water with me and i'm not afraid to use it! but i'm also sorry you had to die such a horrible death i hope you find peace soon

tsukishima: *walks into a basement that is supposedly a portal to hell* fuckin’ take me already

so many 'yamaguchi being an angel and tsukishima being a demon for 10 mins' video compilations

daichi and sugawara

a very chaotic buzzfeed unsolved duo

suga, who is satan’s child himself, and daichi, who needs a raise

daichi: hello everyone! this is daichi,

sugawara: and suga

daichi: and you’re watching...

sugawara: jackass!!

daichi:...buzz...buzzfeed unsolved??

daichi started out being afraid of almost every place he had to walk into but after having to deal with the chaotic mess that is suga for an entire season, he no longer Feels Fear

this is because suga will deadass film a tiktok dance video no matter where he is

daichi: suga, someone was literally axe-murdered there

suga: *dancing along to ‘I’m a Savage’ or whatever that tiktok song is called*

daichi: *at cameraman* do you see what i have to deal with every day?’

suga is only genuinely scared by ghosts when his followers point out that a ghost was caught on camera in one of his tiktok videos

suga: *watching the video*

that was the end of suga’s tiktok career

tanaka and nishinoya:

another bunch of loud bois but they are much louder than kageyama and hinata

they’re very much into proving the existence of cryptids and are most known for that episode they spent hunting bigfoot by dressing up to look like bigfoot

tanaka: ‘you know that thing they do in cartoons where they stack on top of each other under a coat so they look like just one big guy?’

nishinoya: ‘ryuu i love you so fucking much’

other guy there who is also trying to catch bigfoot: oMg ItS bIgFooT *takes picture with the blurriest camera he could find*

both of them are very committed in their investigation of the supernatural and they’re very unconventional approaches

nishinoya: *lying on the ground in a creepy basement* EAT MY HEART DEMONS! WE’LL PUT THE VIDEO ON YOUTUBE!

tanaka: *takes out a spirit board* *spells out O-M-A-E W-A M-O S-H-I-N-D-E-I-R-U*

ghost: *spells out N-A-N-I*

tanaka and nishinoya: *screaming*

kuroo and kenma:

kuroo deadass flirts with any ghost or demon they encounter and kenma would sleep over in a haunted asylum for ten bucks

kuroo: *sidles up to the infamous annabelle doll* hey there little lady, what’s a pretty thing like you doing in a locked, glass case with a ‘don’t touch’ sign like this?

kenma: kuroo, there’s a demon inside her

kuroo: well, i’m a bit of a demon myself

kenma: she attempted to choke a guy in his sleep

kuroo: oooh, choking. i can get behind that...

kenma: *looks at camera*

the demon in annabelle: d-daddy??

“kuroo flirting with demons and kenma looking at the camera for 5 minutes”

kuroo’s actually a huge fucking scaredy cat and kenma secretly tries to push him over the edge

kenma: *plays computer-generated screams of the damned on his phone*

kuroo: WHAT WAS THAT?

kenma: ...I didn’t hear anything *looks at the camera as if he was on the office and plays the sound again*

kuroo: i was too scared to close my eyes last night

kenma: i was actually able to catch a bunch of pokemon last night. who knew the winchester mansion is such a hotspot

producer: did you catch any evidence of ghosts?

kenma: ...i caught a gastly

bokuto and akaashi:

bokuto is a die-hard mothman fan and akaashi is emotionally involved in proving that ghosts exist he will stop at nothing

akaashi: all of the evidence on the shadow figures and orbs spotted in this place can only suggest one thing...

bokuto: mothman did it

akaashi: no

bokuto: yes

akaashi: mothman is literally five states away

bokuto: he has wings

during their individual investigations, akaashi has already foreseen how bokuto is going to react

producer: it’s been quiet for a while. do you think bokuto’s no longer scared?

akaashi: oh no. he should be screaming right about now...

bokuto, inside the haunted house: *screams and waves his flashlight around*

akaashi: and then he’s gonna call for help

bokuto: AKAAAAAASHIIIIIIIIII

*few hours later*

bokuto: i saw my life flash before my eyes in there

akaashi: *muttering incoherently near his ‘evidence wall’ full of blurry pictures and red string*

bokuto: i must’ve stared into the abyss at one point

akaashi: this place is fucking haunted. can i go back? it’s for sale right?

ushijima and tendou:

ushijima’s knowledge of ghosts is based on hollywood movies and tendou has exorcised places just by vibing

ushijima: *brings out a pottery wheel* if there are any ghosts in here, you know what to do

he’s actually never watched Ghost he just knows That One Scene

tendou: *naruto-running through the goatman bridge with a go-pro strapped to his head* IT’S MY BRIDGE GOATMAN, IT’S MY BRIDGE!!!

the Goatman Himself: i’ve never felt so fucking scared in my entire fucking life

ushijima believes that chanting in latin will Summon the Ghosts and tendou takes full advantage of that

tendou: *handing ushijima a slip of paper* here, apparently this will summon a full-bodied apparition

ushijima: thanks *begins chanting*

producer, interviewing tendou to the side: okay, what did you make him read this time?

tendou: i typed out ‘let me eat your ass’ in latin on google translate and went from there

cameraman: *zooms in on ushijima chanting*

the ghost haunting the castle: *is confused in French*

in the end neither of them get evidence on ghosts

ushijima: well, we'll have better luck next time

tendou: maybe even revisit this place ?

the ghosts: i know i'm dead but this is the first time i've been scared for my life

[EDIT: for more buzzfeed unsolved au content written by me, check out The Search for the Mysterious Mothman, a headcanon set feat. bokuaka]

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orangeoctopi7 · 3 years

Text

Buzzfeed Unsolved: The Suspicious Crash of Stanley Pines

The theme for @stanuary week 3 is Crime... what about... TRUE CRIME? I started watching Buzzfeed Unsolved this last summer, so I’ve been wanting to do something like this.

If you don’t watch Buzzfeed Unsolved, this is probably gonna seem like a lot of rambling.

On the morning of July Fourth, 1982 in the sleepy logging town of Gravity Falls, Oregon, there was a firey explosion that wasn't part of the fireworks and festivities. A car had gone over the edge of the town's famed floating cliffs.

"Floating cliffs?" Shane asked

"They're like, giant overhangs. They're not just floating up in the middle of the air like Pandora or something." Ryan explained, showing Shane a photo on his phone.

"Oh, that's pretty."

"It is really pretty."

"What a beautiful place for a car to careen over a cliff."

Ryan cracked up.

"You get a lovely view as you plummet to your death." Shane imagined.

Between 6:15 and 6:20 PM, the Gravity Falls Police Department received six separate calls reporting seeing a yellow car in flames drive off the edge of the cliff and crash to the valley below.

When investigators arrived on the scene, they found the remains of a crushed and burnt 1971 Subaru DL Coupe. The police report notes finding that the brakes were cut, and evidence of gasoline being poured into the driver’s seat to start the fire. Strangest of all, no body was found in or around the crash, only a few burnt strands of hair.

“So, right off the bat, real suspicious.” Shane commented.

“Yeah, and it only gets more suspicious from here.” Ryan assured his co-host.

“And I’m assuming there’s no chance that they guy, y’know, got up and walked away from the crash?”

“Oh, no, no way. You saw the picture of the cliffs.”

“Oh yeah, no way.”

“There’s no way anyone in the car would have survived that fall.”

“And it was on fire.”

Despite the lack of a body, the police determined from the few burnt strands of hair and an anonymous tip they received at 6:15 PM on the day of the crash, the driver of the car was one Stanley Pines, a 31 year old man from Glass Shard Beach, New Jersey. Allegedly, he had been coming to Gravity Falls, Oregon to visit his twin brother, Stanford, who lived just a ten minute drive from the cliff Stan’s car had driven off.

“Wait, wait, wait--” Shane interrupted Ryan’s explanation, “Twin brothers. Named Stanley and Stanford.”

“Yeah.”

“Who the f___ names their kids like that?”

“I know, right?”

“Were they identical twins?”

“Uh, I couldn’t find anything saying they were definitely genetically identical, but, uh, with the way this case goes, it’s safe to assume they were identical enough.”

“Yikes, I feel sorry for them growing up, can you imagine how often people got them mixed up?”

“Yeah, but imagine the kinds of shenanigans they must have gotten up to!”

“Oh, that’s true. There would have been plenty of shenanigans. Lots and lots of shenanigans.”

“If you had twins, would you give them cutesy twin names?” Ryan asked.

“No.” Shane answered firmly.

“I think I’d just do like, alliterative names. Nothing too similar.”

“Yeah, no I think twins probably have to deal with enough confusion bull___ without having to throw similar names or the same initials into the mix.”

“Interestingly enough…” Ryan started.

“Yeah, I’m guessing from your comments that the twin thing plays into this.”

When interviewed by the police, Stanford claimed his brother never arrived at his house. However, testimonies of other townsfolk reported seeing a red 1967 El Diablo with a distinctive “STNLYMBL” vanity license plate driving up the road to Stanford’s house earlier that winter. The house is out in the woods, isolated from the rest of the town, so no one would drive up that way unless they were going to see the cabin.

“Well what if they just wanted to take a walk out in the woods?” Shane countered.

“It was in early February.”

“Snowshoeing.”

“In a blizzard.”

“Ok, you do not have a weather report for the exact day they saw this car!”

“Two of the testimonies mention there was a snow storm that day. Plus, the license plate says STANLEY MOBILE.”

“Well, Stanley is a fairly common name.”

“You-you’re just being contrary to bug me now, aren’t you?” Ryan accused.

Shane just grinned.

What’s more, that same red El Diablo was the car Stanford now drove.

“What!?” Shane laughed with disbelief for a moment before putting on a mocking tone. “Uh, yeah, he never showed up, but, uh, I have his car. I’m still driving it. Y’know, seemed like a waste to just let it sit in the driveway.”

“He didn’t even change the license plate.” Ryan added.

“Oh, of course not!” Shane said sarcastically. “Why go through all that trouble?”

Upon further inspection, the car that crashed was registered to Stanford, and had been reported totaled almost seven years prior.

“It’s interesting that they say it was totaled.” Ryan commented. “Because totalled just means that the damage is more expensive to fix than the car is worth, so it could have still been drivable.”

“And if you’re trying to fake a car crash, what better to use than an already worthless car?” Shane agreed.

“Exactly.”

Stanley Pines was declared dead by auto accident and the case was closed in September of 1982, due to lack of evidence and quote: “A lack of interest from the involved parties”.

“A lack of interest from the involved parties!? What the h___ does that even mean?” Shane asked in bewilderment.

“It’s odd, to be sure.”

It’s when we look into the background of the presumed dead Stanley, and his brother Stanford, that this case becomes truly bizarre.

Stanley Pines left home at the age of 17, and had brief but unsuccessful careers as an amature prize fighter and as a salesman, before he turned to a life of crime. Prior to his reported death, he had been in prison five times, in three different countries, and had lived under at least eight different assumed names, with several others that were never confirmed. He had known ties to the mob and drug cartels.

“Quite the shady character. That might explain why the police didn’t look too closely into his ‘death’.” Shane put air quotes around “death”.

“Well, does it? I mean, if they thought his death might have been related to the mob…” Ryan argued.

“They know better than to mess with the mob, even in Oregon.”

“I mean, we have seen in several past True Crime episodes, what can happen if you mess with the mob.”

“Oh yeah.”

“You don’t wanna do it.”

“Nope.”

His brother Stanford was no less strange. He was born with fully-functional polydactyly, meaning he had six fingers on each hand. It’s worth noting that after 1982, Stanford no longer had 6 fingers. He claims that he had them surgically removed, because, quote: “I was sick of people staring.”

“Uh-huh. Sure.” Shane said doubtfully.

“You don’t believe that explanation?”

“Let’s just say I find it highly suspect.”

Stanford was also a certified genius, graduating with the most PhDs Backupsmore University had ever awarded. As a graduate student, he worked as a researcher and inventor for the US Government. Some sources say he worked on top-secret experiments.

In 1975, he received a $100,000 research grant, which he used to move to Gravity Falls and become a Paranormal Researcher. When he arrived in Gravity Falls, he was the subject of many rumors throughout the town, due to his reclusive nature and strange area of study.

“Oh, so this guy was basically you.” Shane pointed out.

“He’s basically me if I didn’t have you.” Ryan agreed.

“Awww, that’s sweet!” Shane placed a hand over his heart.

Many residents reported seeing strange lights coming from Stanford’s home in the woods starting almost as soon as he moved in, as well as strange sounds.

“Well, it seems like Gravity Falls is a pretty small town. People gossip.” Shane reasoned.

“Ok, yeah, but people gossip about who’s cheating on who, or what business secretly sells drugs out the back. They don’t gossip about strange lights coming out of the new neighbor’s basement.”

“They could. It’s gossip. Gossip can be about anything.”

Reports of the lights stopped in late January of 1982. Just four months later, in March, Stanford began opening up his home for tours, and in a matter of weeks, transformed his home into a tourist stop called the “Murder Hut.”

“Oh my g__.” Shane stifled a laugh. “A little on the nose there, don’t you think?”

“He did rename it to the Mystery Shack about a year later.”

“Hmm, yeah I wonder why?” Shane asked facetiously.

Stanford also exhibited paranoid behavior on several occasions before the crash, especially in the early months of 1982.

One local reported seeing Stanford screaming “No it isn’t, you creeps! I can see you just fine!” down an alleyway. Several other eyewitnesses reported seeing him fall out of his seat at the Triple Digits Truck Stop Diner on Route 14 and scream for something to “get out of his mind” before fleeing the building.

“So, he definitely seemed to think something was out to get him.” Ryan commented.

“Not the words of a sane man.”

“Unless something really was out to get him.”

“Eeeeh, even then…” Shane wiggled his hand in a so-so motion.

Dan Corduroy, one of the few people who had regular contact with Stanford before he opened the Mystery Shack, had this to say about the sudden change from research lab to tourist trap:

“Oh, he’s definitely been acting differently. He was really shy before, hard to talk to even. He seemed uncomfortable spending a lot of time with people. I’d invite him over to one of my family’s cabins to visit, but he only ever wanted to visit the haunted one while we were all out of town. I’d say it was a good change, though. It wasn’t good for him to be alone all the time like that. I’m glad he’s finally spending time with other people.”

“He only wanted to visit our haunted cabin.” Shane repeated with disbelief. “Hey, do you wanna come over to visit one of our cabins?” He put on a voice. “Uh, that depends, what kind of cabins have you got?’ ‘Well there’s one by the lake, one with a nice view of the valley, and one that’s haunted.’ ‘Oh, I’ll take the haunted one!”

“What gets me is he only wanted to visit the haunted cabin while everyone else was out of town. We’ve stayed in our fair share of haunted places, and it was bad enough staying overnight, just me and you, but there is nothing that could convince me to spend the night in one of those places all by myself.”

“I mean, I’m pretty sure none of the places we’ve been to have actually been haunted, but I see what you mean. It’s not fun to go to a haunted house by yourself. It’s kinda boring.”

“Um, we’re not gonna get into this discussion now, because we still haven’t even gotten to the theories yet, but you’re wrong.”

The case came to light again in August of 2012, when Federal agents arrested Stanford Pines, and detained him for several hours for questioning. By the next day, he had been released, and officials stated that his arrest had been due to a false lead. What exactly that false lead was, however, was never stated.

Now that we’ve gone over the extensive background of this case, let’s get into the theories of what really happened that 4th of July in 1982.

Theory #1: The theory put forth by the police, that Stanley Pines died in a fiery car accident.

“So then how do they explain what happened to the body?” Shane asked.

“It doesn’t say.” Ryan.

“And why were the breaks cut?”

“No explanation given.”

“That’s a stupid theory, those cops ought to be fired.”

Ryan stifled a laugh. “You’re not wrong.”

Theory #2: That Stanley killed his brother, made it look like his own death, and took over his brother’s life. This would explain the loss of his extra fingers, the sudden change in behavior that led him to open up the Mystery Shack, and his sudden acquisition of Stanley’s car. It does not, however, explain the lack of a body in the crash.

“He could have disposed of his brother’s body somewhere else, and then just like, left an ice block on the gas pedal and let the car run itself off the cliff.” Shane theorized.

“That’s possible. I was also thinking, maybe the body was gone. Maybe Stanley didn’t necessarily kill Stanford, maybe they met up in the woods, Stanford got eaten by a bear, and Stanley, who was already in trouble with the mob, took advantage of the situation, and faked his own death.”

“How--why did you work your fear of bears into this?”

“That’s just my variation on this theory.”

“Then why all the secrecy? Why not say that he was the one who got eaten by the bear? Why fake the car crash and then say his brother never showed up?”

“Because if the mob knew he’d talked to his brother before he died, maybe they’d come question him?”

“Oh, yeah, that’s a possibility.”

Theory #3: That Stanford killed Stanley and made it look like an accident. People who support this theory say the psychological trauma and guilt of killing his own brother may have driven Stanford to change his appearance and behavior to more closely resemble that of his dead brother.

“That’s… kind of a stretch.” Shane said slowly. “I feel like, Occam's Razor, theory 2 is more plausible.”

“What makes you say that one’s more plausible?”

“I dunno, just saying ‘He killed his brother and took his place’ seems a lot more likely than ‘The other brother killed him and the guilt drove him to act like his brother. I don’t think that’s how psychology works.”

Theory #4: Both brothers are still alive. Stanley, on the run from the mob, came to his brother Stanford for help. Meanwhile, Stanford was worried about someone or something that was out to get him. They came to a solution that would solve both their problems: switching places. They would fake Stanley’s death, throwing the mob off of Stanley’s trail. Then, Stanley would take Stanford’s place in the public eye, while Stanford went into hiding.

This theory is supported by photos that surfaced on Facebook in 2012. Several photos of Gravity Falls after a series of earthquakes did extensive damage to the town show what is supposed to be Stanford. However, another man that looks just like him is seen standing in the background. Interestingly enough, both mens’ hands are obscured in all of these photos.

While the photos haven’t been analysed by any professionals to definitively determine if either of the men are Stanley Pines, it has been determined that the photos are not edited.

“Would the whole photo recognition software even work on identical twins?” Ryan wondered.

“I don’t think so?” Shane answered unsurely. “I mean, my Facebook facial recognition auto-tag doesn’t even recognize my mom half the time, so I wouldn’t be surprised if twins throw it off.”

“Just looking at some of these photos yourself, what do you think?” Ryan handed a few print-outs from his folder to Shane.

“Oh wow, yeah, they do look alike.” Shane nodded. “Alright, yeah, I’m convinced. We solved it, guys! Video over!”

“We actually do have one more theory.” Ryan informed him.

Theory #5: Stanford was abducted by aliens.

“Oh for f___’s sake--” Shane threw his hands up in frustration. “We have four perfectly good, plausible explanations, and you have to throw that in!”

“This one actually does have some evidence behind it.”

“Bull____, but go on.”

Stanford was a professional paranormal researcher. Although he was very secretive about his research, even to his grant committee, some of his research notes do list looking for proof of ancient aliens visiting the valley before European contact. Could it be the thing he was afraid of was aliens?

“... That’s it?” Shane asked. “When you said this one actually had some evidence behind it, I thought you meant there was a UFO sighting in the same area around the same time.”

“The negative space between the floating cliffs kinda looks like a UFO” Ryan pointed out.

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean a random researcher in the 80’s was abducted by aliens! That’s like, if I found a ransom note for you in the office, but I said ‘Well, Ryan was afraid of bears. Bears used to live in California, there’s one on the state flag outside our building. He must have been eaten by a bear.’ That’s the kind of leap in logic we’re talking about!”

Was this a case of fratricide? Or is this the longest and most elaborate twin switch of all time? For now, this case remains… UNSOLVED.

* * *

“It was really hard for me to stay on topic while I was researching this one.” Ryan admitted as they wrapped things up. “There is a lot of weird stuff related to Gravity Falls, we should go there for an episode one of these days.”

“I’d love to do that, it looks like a beautiful place to visit.” Shane agreed. “Are you sure you wanna do that though? It seems like the place is crawling with haunted cabins and bears.”

“Well, one could argue this entire series is about me conquering my fears, so… Why not?”

#Gravity Falls #Fanfiction #Buzzfeed Unsolved #Stanuary 2021 #Stanley pines #My Writing

405 notes · View notes

lvlyhao · 3 years

Text

『you’re dating him but he’s not your bias』

reaction fic; NCT Dream

A/N: this is nct dream’s reaction to realizing your bias is not him (and you’re a couple). gender neutral, got way too deep at some points and was NOT meant to be this long. enjoy.

note that english is my second language and i speak mixing slang, accents and spellings from 3283928 places so i did notice there’s practice written with both s and c down there so

just dont mind it pls

also, today’s photo theme is dream looking cute in low quality shots.

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓻𝓮𝓼: fluff (♡), angst (❆), comedy (☼), crack (⍢).

𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼: lots of swearing, my tough love for the neos, one mention of cheating that doesn’t actually happen, a couple of mentions of alcohol and drinking, some violence hidden in metaphors, me being chaotic, it got a bit more angsty and darker than i intended, but we do have all happy endings.

word count: 6.8K

pairing: nct dream members x reader ( includes mark, renjun, jeno, haechan, jaemin, chenle, jisung)

disclaimer: the characters in the story below do not reflect real people or present real facts. this is purely fictional, and you may not copy, change, translate or repost my work in any way. all rights reserved © cherry-hyejin 2021.

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

Mark

oh, poor baby

i feel like he would be a little heartbroken

just a little

not so much if it’s someone from dream, because they’re his little brothers, but if it’s one of his hyungs from 127 or wayv,,,,,

boy might cry

he’s not super dramatic about it or anything but i don’t see him as being super confident about himself

so he might think like

“do they think he’s cooler than me?”

and it’s silly, yes, he knows

but it’s just something that pops up in his mind sometimes when you bring him up

so for the sake of this fanfic let’s pretend you’re johnny biased

because gods know i am

at least when it comes to 127

mark would be divided into fanboying with you and being like “YO, HE’S THE COOLEST GUY ON EARTH OH MY GOD I’M SO GLAD YOU AGREE”

and

“a h”

would constantly try to get closer to you when johnny is around, and just

showing off in little (kinda dumb) ways

complimenting you

being even more whipped than usual

like yes he’ll give you all of his watermelon slices just please don’t look at johnny like that again

i think johnny would kind of play into it with the whole “imma steal your s/o” thing

and he doesn’t do it to make mark jealous or hurt

we know he’d rather get hit by a train than ever actually upsetting his son on purpose

but we also know he’s johnny

cue “OH DUDE HE’S FLIRTING”

so yeah he might call you lil pet names (beautiful, cutie, you get it)

just to see you giggle

(and see your soul leave your body)

might say he’s taking you out for dinner when he’s just driving you to get more ice cream for a movie night with the gang lol

and winks

expect a lot of winks

anywhere and anytime

which makes mark sometimes feel like he’s intruding???

and that you appreciate johnny more than him???

he genuinely doesn’t understand how you can date him and still not have him as your bias

don’t you like, love him above everyone else or smth lol

his “showing off” phase eventually fades tho

now every time you hang you with the boys and johnny is around, he’ll be a bit more distant

he thinks he’s giving you space to interact with his friends but he’s just shying away from competing with one of his favourite people ever

and it’s a competition that Does Not Exist™

but he’s not 100% aware of that

and you’re not that dense

so ofc you notice

and you wait till you two are alone to talk to him, and he BEGRUDGINGLY admits that you being johnny biased makes him feel kinda small and unimportant

he’d never try to make you change your bias or anything

he just needs reminders that he’s your #1 boy sometimes

which is fine by you

and by him

cus now it’s you calling him pet names all the time

and hugging him

and kissing his cheek

and praising his work

and blowing kisses from across the room

and just telling him straight up that no matter what, you’ll always go to him

(not that you ever had any chance with johnny lmao)

THIS GOES TO SHOW COMMUNICATING IS KEY, CHILDREN

COMMUNICATE

Renjun

wym donghyuck is your bias lol

literally are you fucking kidding him

don’t get me wrong ok

everyone knows renjun loves haechan

they’re bffs and could not live without each other

but at the same time,,,

what is wrong with you

who did he choose as his s/o gods help him

if it was jeno, or mark, or jaehyun, or winwin, or kun, or lucas, or yuta, or taeyong, or ten, or,,,,

literally ANY of his other members

he’d understand your point and be like “ok fine”

but haechan???? hmmm bestie no

he’s not gonna throw a fit

not after the first time you told him anyways

HE WAS SURPRISED OKAY

and he just whined very loudly after having laughed for 5 minutes thinking it was a joke

if you don’t know that iconic scene, renjun had a whole ass meltdown in 3 seconds while yelling “aAAAAAH JINJJAAAAA” and getting ready to punch the living shit out of hyuck

for no reason other than the fact that it’s haechan we’re talking about and injun’s little body is filled with rage

BACK ON TRACK

would probably try to act all cool about it and be like “i don’t mind” but bruh does he mind

and it doesn’t help that haechan is such a little shit about it

he doesn’t even flirt with you

he just

constantly reminds renjun that he’s your bias—not him—and then constantly praises himself over you

“ah, y/n~ did you choose me as your bias because i’m the best vocalist? or was it because i’m the best dancer? mAYBE IT WAS BECAUSE OF MY OH SO BROAD SHOULDERS—”

(pause for injun to punch him)

(unpaused)

and ok in the beginning it was funny seeing him all worked up but now it’s just annoying to be in the same room as these two

haechan won’t let either of you live

and renjun just wants to

fight

so it eventually gets to the point where you’ll talk to renjun and jeno will talk to hyuck cus even the other dreamies are tired of it

except maybe for chenle, he always laughs his ass off when they start bickering

ANYWAY

your conversation goes something like “oh my god renjun i’m literally dating you, i don’t like haechan better or anything you little pile of fury”

while jeno sits hyuck down in front of him and jaemin and just

“bro why are you like this”

“bro”

no but renjun would apologize for going overboard with his protectiveness and jealous energy because he’s not generally like that

he’s angry all the time but never about something involving you, you know

he tries his best to treat you like the royalty you are

but something about hyuck being your bias makes him feel a bit like a castaway???

he’s very creative and as an artsy kid myself i know we’re very prone to feeling left out because we’re just different from the others

so he’d think maybe haechan really has a better voice

or better dancing skills

or he looks better

he is taller than injun after all, and has broader shoulders, and his hair is all fluffy and—

the whole thing just made him insecure about things he had settled with himself long ago

he was fine with being him

but not so much when it came to that

i don’t think you two would fight over it cus tbh i think renjun would really only get with someone who can be very understanding of him

and i think hyuck would actually apologize to renjun too

not when everyone’s around but like, maybe after dinner or something and he just needs to feel like they’re besties again

hyuck never meant for things to get out of control

he just really likes both injun and you as his friends, and aside from skinship his most prominent love language is,,,

teasing

he was really just trying (very poorly) to grow closer to the person his best friend loves so much—you—because renjun is SUCH a big part of his life it would just feel wrong to not be good friends with you as well

don’t tell them i said this but they hug it out

injun strikes me as someone that could take a bit of time to bounce back from something that hurt his pride or his sense of belonging

and his way of healing and bonding is just,,,

art

sure, keep being haechan biased, but also please read with him

and talk about his fantastic animal creations

and watch those buzzfeed unsolved alien theory videos because he really wants to discuss it and maybe even draw what he thinks the aliens look like

hyuck tones it down, you make sure renjun knows you like him for him, renjun starts to (secretly) appreciate hyuck’s talent along with you...

and now let’s take a moment to imagine the minute you watch their latest mv with injun by your side

and yes okay the first thing you see is CLEARLY how good renjun looks because holy fucking shit he’s an angel (and i’m clearly not renjun biased)

but then,,,,,,

wAS THAT A HAECHAN HIGH NOTE

(there’s always a haechan high note, just look for it)

and ok maybe he did scream a bit with you because of how good it all sounded

and you know what, it works out perfectly bc you two are my new otp and you were meant for each other

but we do have to mention the eventual happening of chenle saying like “oOoOoOoH y/N wErE yOu dRoOliNg oVeR hAeChAn AgAiN” after a special stage

and then you, injun and hyuck all attempt to choke him

i’m kidding

or not

Jeno

ah, lee jeno

aka samoyed boi

yes i do call him that no i will not stop

everyone is always writing jeno as being super protective and literally about to burst a lung if someone else ever does as much as look at you

but i just

don’t see him that way

he’s a taurus and from what i know about taurus they can be v v jealous, yes, but they mainly seek comfort

so he’s fine with you biasing jaemin

as long as you’re not ditching him or anything lol

and ok, imma be 100% honest here even if it sounds like literal no fun (jenojaem wink wonk)

jaemin doesn’t flirt with you

not any more than he flirts with

every other breathing creature

ever

he’s really only platonically interested in you, never remotely romantic or anything lol

on the other side, he is in love with jeno

basically, if jaemin is your bias, jeno is his

so nothing really changes

we know how nomin are, okay

they hold hands, they stare deeply into each other eyes, they nearly kiss at least once every time they go live

it's just them

you gotta respect it bruh

i know this is the most boring reaction ever so let’s create the one (1) instance where jeno would actually dislike that you bias someone else

i think he would feel a bit hurt if you seemed to be more supportive of jaemin’s work than his

and it’s not something big or on purpose

it’s just something like going with him to a recording session but not going with jeno because you have homework

or after a very busy practise day going to praise jaemin first

even if it’s just three words

“you did good”

and then you’re going towards him, he’s gonna feel like maybe he doesn’t deserve your praise as much as nana????

i actually feel like, among the dreamies, jeno is the least confident one when it comes to his performance

he knows he’s not an awful rapper or anything but i think it can be a bit too much, being around such bright and huge presences like the others while his nickname literally means “no fun”

his members are just so loud and full of energy most of the time

and sometimes he just really needs to be quiet and observe in silence

(yes i do know he’s chaotic and a crackhead, i’m just saying as we know he can be a bit introspective)

so what if you just

stopped seeing him?

did he become invisible to you?

did you finally fall for jaemin’s beautiful smile and stupid pick-up lines?

he’s not gonna let it show that he’s affected, though

earth signs are nearly always the ones to “stay strong” because we have this image that people are relying on us???

so we do what we do

bottle everything up and overwork ourselves bc we only got two modes

1. chill, super balanced and down to earth (ay for the pun)

2. please make us take a break we’re literally about to cry if we work for one more minute but we can’t allow ourselves to fucking take it easy

so yes you’ve guessed correctly, we’re going with 2

jeno is going to go so, SO hard on everything he does

literally every single activity you can think of from dance practice to photoshoots to cooking for the dreamies

he stays up later than usual to get that one tricky move in the choreo just right

he works out more because he thinks he has to look absolutely perfect for when they shoot the mv

jisung asked for ramen? he’s making it but you bet your ass he’s spending over 40 minutes just chopping so

many

vegetables

AND STUFF THAT JISUNG WON’T EVEN EAT

but he’s doing it anyway for the reason being that it just has to be the Best™

and it’s not like he’s competing with anyone else to be diligent

this is just about being better than he was and showing himself—and maybe you—how painstakingly hardworking and driven he can be

maybe then you’re gonna acknowledge him as much as you acknowledge nana :((

:(((((

writing this is making me downright sad, jeno is so underrated and unaware of his power UGH

and i need to point out this is NOT about making you change your bias from jaemin to him, this is solely about having you recognize his efforts, even if you already do

if you just thought jeno was like going off in work because it was asked of him to, jaemin would DEF notice and talk to you about it

turns out it’s a habit of jeno to go extra hard sometimes and he needs someone to make him take a break

so it goes down like you breaking into the practice room when jeno and jisung were practising

the first reaction is confusion

the second is oh hey babe how are you

third is

a-are you dragging jeno and his bag out of the door while screeching at jisung to order pizza and doughnuts for everyone??

yes you are and i’m proud of you

so jeno is still confused and making those cute “hUh” noises he does omg i love him so much

and you’re just rambling about how much of an amazing artist he is, and you love his voice, and he’s a fantastic dancer, and his expressions and gestures are on point, and he takes such good care of the dreamies and

he’s perfect

and he knows jaemin must have talked to you, and he feels so vulnerable to have you know how on edge he’s been

baby boy just needs some rest

and that’s exactly what you give him, with a bath full of those fancy bath bombs and flower petals and candles at your house/apt

then a quick sheet mask while you massage his shoulders and keep saying how much you genuinely admire him

the mask might be ruined cus he started crying out of exhaustion

after that’s been done and you’ve hugged for at least like 5 min nonstop, you head over to the dorms, where hyuck was in charge of setting up a blanket fort while mork and nana gather board games, jisung gets the food and chenle

well chenle just had to make sure jisung doesn’t forget to order for someone and doesn’t break like 10 plates trying to set the table lol

this is way longer than the others so imma wrap it up

make it obvious and loud that you see and respect jeno’s hard work and he’ll be alright again

and maybe make those game nights a weekly thing when possible, it would make him very happy

he’ll never again feel sad when you praise jaemin cus now he’s sure he does enough, and above all, he is enough

Haechan

haechan = full sun

why would you ever bias someone when you’re dating the goddamned sun

does not understand

but also does not care that much

actually, one out of two really depending on who your bias is

if it’s one of the members he has that tom/jerry relationship with, prepare for so

much

complaining

and clinging

AND HE’D BE SO LOUD OH MY FUCKING GOD

donghyuck please stop screaming about doyoung not deserving to be your baby’s bias, it’s 2 am

on the other hand, if it’s one of the (few) members he,,,

adores with all of his heart and is not afraid to show it

ex: sungchan, jaehyun, taeil and yang2x

then you can bet he’s going to be right beside you whenever you feel like throwing a fit because he’s just so handsome and talented

IF IT’S MARK OSHDISJD

i’m going to write you as being mark biased ok? ok

i honestly don’t know if he’d feel more jealous of mark or of you

he loves you both

a lot,,,,

and he really doesn’t like it when mark blushes when you compliment him

and he doesn’t like it when mark literally just walks past you and you trip over your feet because bro tf u doing, that’s some embarrassing shit

lowkey done with you two

but also PAY HIM SOME ATTENTION

or don’t, he’s fine either way (cue crossed arms and staring at you from across the room until you come give him a kiss)

“he’s pretty cute but i’m cuter right baby”

pouty pouty pouty if he ever feels neglected

will be so fucking annoying lmao i can’t write haechan, i love him but i do understand why renjun is always trying to beat him up

he’d be a show-off in a different way than mark because he can be so petty

will take every chance he gets to pull a one-liner

will sing everything he has to say just so you know he can hit those high notes

what do you mean dream doesn’t have a schedule today

oh man, he could swear they did

because that is the sole reason why he’s wearing his most expensive clothes and shoes + makeup to walk around the dorms, yes

no he doesn’t want to impress you

shut up

will text you like every single fancam he sees on twitter

every

single

one

and are they mark’s?

lol no, they’re his

he is so genuinely trying to make you a member of his sunflower cult

<whispers> “tell me i’m your bias”

“donghyuck what the actual hell why are you standing at the end of my bed in the middle of the night like a fucking demon child”

he really wants to act all cool and composed but he wants to be your bias so fucking bad

he’s a bad bitch all around and just does whatever

cus haechan privilege

and he tends to not care about what people say and think???

bc he knows he’s lee donghyuck

he’s fully aware of the effect he has on people

but you

not biasing him

naw, he can’t take it

will do anything and everything he can to make you say, JUST ONE TIME, he’s your bias

then you can go back to loving (his) mark

so for your sake, for his sake, for mark’s sake

just give donghyuck what he wants

i can promise he’ll keep being an ass no matter what you do

like yeah did you just buy him coffee and his favourite cake? well that’s sweet but iS HE YOUR BIAS YET

“aw babe thanks so much for taking a bullet for me but now please say i’m your bias”

if you still don’t do it, it’s time to be extra petty

will actually drop you for mark

his logic is something like: he can’t be your bias? pity, so he’s just gonna date him instead

and mark is mark so he has no idea what’s going on

everyone in 127 and dream finds this absolutely hilarious cus suddenly donghyuck seems to be doing his best to win over mark’s heart and i mean more than usual???? and he’s treating you like his bro????

<you leaving the dorms to go to uni or smth so you go to hyuck for a goodbye kiss> “no can do, i’m committed”

“i’m your partner”

“no that’s mark”

it’s not 100% a joke when i say i can see him getting down in one knee to propose to mark while making eye contact with you to

assert his dominance

and mark is just

“dude

what HAHAHA”

and you are so done, i’m so sorry you have to go through that bby

i don’t think there’s another way to fix haechan other than just admitting he was your bias for an era, or a comeback or something

like yeah with the other dreamies before him it’s bonding + healing time bc i wrote it all kinda angsty (lol sorry) but with donghyuck

“will you stop this if i say you were my bias during reload era”

“mark wasn’t in dream that era tho”

“yes i know”

i say he’s gonna take what he can get and now things can finally go back to normal

with the exception that something else comes along with hyuck being satisfied with you biasing him

he just has a full pass to fanboy over mark now too

what am i talking about?

new 127 mv is out

you: watching it beside haechan and going off about how pretty mark looks

him: going off even harder bc he’s whipped too

this is what a happy couple looks like

but now i pity mark because he has you two idiots fanboying over him irl

savemork2021

Jaemin

nana is just such a chill and fun guy

i can’t see him being actually jealous or anything if he finds out you bias someone else

and so the two of you become insufferable together

bitch, i’m telling you

he (ur bias) is not gonna have one peaceful day ever again in his entire life

cus you know the thing jaemin does where he just looks at someone doing some random shit and goes “oOoOoH sExY”

yes that thing

he’s doing it to your bias

and you’re doing it too

and your bias probably wants to run away to some very far away land

PLEASE IF IT’S JISUNG

i’m not gonna write this whole thing as if you bias him but let’s just imagine

two fully grown people

pilling on top of poor, poor park jisung playing games on his phone

“URI JISUNGIEEEEEE

MWOYA, MWOYAAAA~"

i genuinely think he would avoid being around you two at the same time

cus individually he can handle it

like yes y/n please let me go this hug has lasted for about 4 minutes now

or oh hi jaemin hyung my cheeks hurt when you pinch them that hard

but when you two are together

bruh

a power couple not bc you two are v confident or some shit but bc you can and will be extremely affectionate towards anyone that comes too close

and now let’s talk about how it would be if you biased jaehyun

jaemin loves jaehyun

they’re 2jae

2jae are soulmates

therefore,,,, it’s also kinda hellish but in a different way???

bc 2jae are on the end of that spectrum about the neos that know how in love the entire world is with them

they’re too powerful

they’re aware of their charm and they do everything they can to rub it in our faces

so the flirting between 2jae and you would be insane

and i mean insane

insane as in even johnny is kinda disgusted tbh bc

they’re doing a photo shoot with the 23 of them for some shit, idk don’t ask me

and of course, you had to tag along

but oh my god you three, please stop calling each other sexy/hot in weird voices now, the staff is staring

there are def rumours the 3 of you are a poly couple lmao

jaehyun denies everything on social media (throwback to saying “no way lol” when we asked if he REALLY slept in the same bed as jungwoo)

but every piece of content there is of you and jaemin or you and jaehyun or just them is so ridiculously flirty

you can bet there are compilations on youtube like

“y/n being in love with 2jae for 8 minutes heterosexual”

ok i was having way too much fun with that, moving on

i don’t think he’d ever be actually upset about you biasing someone else

he trusts you and treasures you a lot so he doesn’t see the problem in you also appreciating another one of his members

bc gods know he does

he’s a bit in love with everyone so why shouldn’t you be too lol

one time he would feel a bit blue because of it???

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

i think it’s possible he’d turn pouty or whiny or just kinda needy (not in a bad way, he just misses you) when he’s like

done with people

and needs some time away from everything

we know he’s an introvert, even if he acts very, very loud around the boys and it’s honestly just a matter of time until an introvert grows tired of being around humans

it depends on each person, of course, but there’s a 99% chance every once in a while he’ll start to feel too drained

and he’ll need a break to get his energy back

jaemin would probably want you around even when he feels like that, though

i see you being such a big source of comfort for him in a relationship

he enjoys taking care of people so please take care of him too

and for just this one day don’t talk about your bias that much, or don’t leave nana to go over to him to chat

and just cuddle him a lot

that will make him a smiley baby again

and then things are back to how they normally are

and by that i mean most neos hiding from you because they’re scared

i don’t have a lot to say aside from that so let’s think about the neos that would be the most intimidated by your shared thot aura

dotae would be confused in different ways lol

taeyong would be just ????????????blush/awkward smile/hahaha??????

and doyoung might actually ask what is wrong with you

<points to jeno and his s/o> “why can’t you be like them”

mark would laugh-scream and slap his knee into oblivion whenever you two are cornering him

but then go super shy and be like “dUDE DON’T DO THAT”

resident confident gay jungwoo would rejoice in the attention and make so many goddamned jokes

a literal comedian i love him

i think sicheng and renjun would be on the same wavelength of repugnance towards you lol

chenle would deadass call you weird and tell you to leave him alone

shotaro and kun might faint (or kun will panic-scold you)

taeil is as confused by affection as usual (have you seen the face he makes when haechan kisses him LMFAO he’s smiling but like wondering wtf happened on the inside)

ten is not very amused but might play into it

yangyang: that’s disgusting, man (cue flashbacks to that live with renjun after the from home stage where renjun pretended to lick his hand and slick his hair back,,, catboy injun,,, you know the one)

xiaojun and hendery are such panicked gays they just turn to stare at whoever else is around and make that “help” expression like they’re on the office

haechan is haechan, kinda doesn’t mind it

jeno is used to dealing with this at this point

lucas and yuta love the attention but while yuta will flirt right back lucas is just gonna smile and try to jop his way out of there while screaming

sungchan will go hide behind haechan and say “hyung they’re being dumbasses again”

this turned into ‘how would nct react to you and jaemin being super flirty together’ and i’m not sorry

Chenle

chenle is so fun to write i love him lmao

okay so

he doesn’t strike me as the possessive type with anyone other than jisung (bc i swear he can be a bit jelly towards his bestie but i think it comes with sungie being the sweetest bean ever, he’s just protective)

he’s such a ray of sunshine and witty jokes and dolphin laughter i love him

back to the plot

he literally couldn’t care less about you biasing someone else

b u t

i will say there’s an exception

this exception is tall, kinda lanky, very awkward and born on the 5th of february

you’ve guessed it, it’s jisung

i think most of the time he’d tease THE SHIT out of you for it because c’mon

you had 22 chances not to mess up

and you still somehow ended up biasing jisung? lol do better next time

and this is not me and chenle hating on jisung, please—

he’d just find it funny that your bias is his best friend and

hold the fuck up

your bias is his best friend

oH NO NO NO NO NO

i think after realizing that he would lowkey try to keep you two apart because he’s somehow jealous of both????

and if he can’t help it then you can bet your ass he will be screaming all along

it’s his sweet, dummy jisung

with his sweeter and dummier y/n

what is he going to do

probably has a mini-breakdown with kun because like he’s always wanted you two to get along bUT NOT LIKE THAT

kun will just sigh like the tired father he is and pet his back while saying “there, there”

and a genius idea is going to come to chenle’s mind

you know the teasing thing?

well it’s upgrade time

he’s gonna turn into such a try-hard with tmi and embarrassing shit you two have done

and he’s not trying to stop you from being friends

he just wants you to like

know who you’re befriending

bc i think since he’s really really close to jisung, he doesn’t want you getting closer to him bc you like his idol side alone

and he doesn’t want jisung getting close to you just because you’re his partner either

if you had high hopes for each other and ended up kinda falling face-first into the ground bc it was nothing like you had imagined—

he’d be so broken

because he loves you so much :((((

so like, if you can get past the teasing and annoying barrier he’s putting up, he’ll be more than happy to have two of the most important people in his life being buddies

so get ready for it

if you’re the type of person to go batshit crazy when you drink, oh boy, oh boy

so you and the dreamies are just having dinner when lele feels like it’s the perfect time to disclose some of your drunken adventures

“hey y/n”

“yeah babe?”

“remember that time you got really really drunk on vodka and candy and wanted to call your mom”

“chenle the hell don’t talk ab—”

“but then you tried using the microwave as a phone”

“...”

“or that other time you were equally as drunk and watched the make a wish mv and cried because you noticed the height difference between xiaojun hyung and lucas hyung”

yeah so now’s the part you get up to chase him around the dorms and try to land a kick

BUT WORRY NOT, HE’LL MAKE SURE TO EMBARRASS JISUNG JUST AS MUCH

he likes doing that when it’s just the three of you though

so picture this

movie night the girls boys

chenle would 100% pick the most terrifying horror movie he can find so that he could see jisung clinging to whoever’s closest to him

and then right before a jumpscare, he’d whisper like

“jisung”

“w-what”

“why don’t you do that thing you were doing while you slept last night”

(honestly, i’d be mildly scared if i heard lele say this with no context at all)

and then the jumpscare happens and jisung is nearly fainting and crying at the same time

but chenle is laughing

and trying to get out what he wants to tell you between wheezes

“he-he” <dolphin wheeze> “hE WAS SINGING CHEER UP BY TWICE WHILE SLEEPING” <more wheezes>

and look this is just gonna go on for weeks until you and jisung are over it

and stop being weird and awkward around each other

lele needs you two to be bros ok

so be bros

once you do adapt to being pals with your bias i think chenle would take the teasing down a notch just to make you more comfortable

and like he’s so happy now the three of you can hang out and there’s just no tension

happy chenle is the thing i love the most i swear to gods

and if you don’t adapt to it?

well,,,

i honestly think he’d be pretty disappointed, cus it means to him one of you isn’t ready to fully embrace the weirdness within????

and like what u scared of

jisung is a weirdo, what about it, so are you

either that or he’d think you’re maybe being judgemental

so yeah please accept jisungie and your dumbass boyfriend

then everyone can be besties

i love thinking about the three of you as just this hellbound chaotic trio

because chenji already wreak havoc wherever they go as the two of them

but now that you’re coming along,,,,

no neo would escape from your pranks ever again (and even members of other groups lmfao watch out sehun, i’m talking to you)

and it’s so incredible infuriating in a good way that it just turns to be endearing

you’re cute as fuck so no one gets actually mad with the shit you pull????

which is dangerous, someone should really keep an eye out on the three of you

we don’t need sm to be on fire

well we kinda do cus they’re pretty bad but not my point

i said somewhere above that chenle would tone the teasing down but i don’t mean he’d stop

bc c’mon guys

he’s chenle

no limits here

but sorry, i really cannot write jealous!chenle cus his heart is just too pure and filled with joy for him to be jealous for real

last scenario?

chenle after a comeback stage: ya y/n, i was gonna ask how was my performance today but you were probably more focused on jisung’s arms right

jisung is choking on water somewhere behind you

Jisung

it’s maknae time <plays i.n’s maknae on top>

i don’t mean to picture jisung as being like

ridiculously innocent or just downright naive because i really dislike it when people do that

he’s a literal 19 yo and jaemin himself has said he’s not as innocent as we think lol

however

i do see him as being quite new to all things love

i think you’d probably be his first partner and with first relationships comes a lot of other firsts

first kiss maybe, first time holding hands, first time being jealous….

first time being jealous, yes, focus on that

i don’t think jisung would be aware that like

you not biasing him is even a possibility

cuz you’re dating

doesn’t that come along????

ah poor baby i love him

if you biased chenle i think he’d be just

disgusted and weirded out but okay?? you do you i guess???

he’s comfortable enough with lele to not feel intimidated

but if it’s another member

ESPECIALLY one of the oldest ones

i think it would be a blow straight to his confidence

you biasing ten, kun, taeil, taeyong, doyoung or johnny and maybe yuta would make him feel a bit hesitant and concerned

his first thought would probably be that you don’t like being with someone as young as him

and who knows, maybe you’re even younger than him, maybe you’re the same age, but what if you actually like older guys??

what about him then???

and jisung doesn’t mean to feel so worried and insecure, ok, pls understand where i’m coming from

first relationships normally take like a very long time to build trust and acceptance of the other person’s feelings bc it’s literally a whole new world for you

and that goes extra hard for jisung because he is so fucking whipped for you it’s still hard to believe you like him as much

and it absolutely does not cross his mind that you’d cheat on him with your bias, GODS NO

he really respects you and his hyungs

so no, never

that’s not a thing that can happen

but you realize you’re too good for him and maybe see he doesn’t fit your ideal type?

well, yes, that’s what he’s thinking

probably goes straight to chenle or renjun (he talks about renjun so much asjahj) to vent and ask for advice

i think they’d be surprised to see what’s going on inside his pretty little head because it’s so obvious for everyone that you just adore jisung

and they do tell him that

however, i don’t think it would completely calm his nerves, and again, this has nothing to do with not trusting you

it’s just that

his hyungs are so cool…

HE CAN’T HELP IT OK

would probably try to mirror your bias (i’m saying it’s taeyong for the sake of what i’ve imagined ok) and like

grasp onto some of his qualities?

so in his mind taeyong is: nice, sweet, caring, amazing, perfect, smart, perfect, sexy, mature and did i mention perfect

i can see him trying some new rap styles that mimic tyong’s a bit???

like would lowkey learn his raps from cherry bomb and superm’s one and listen to recordings frequently to pick up on how taeyong does it

i think he’d also just change the way he acts in general to dodge a bit from his maknae image

so now he tries to speak with a more formal-ish language and learns random facts about things you like to seem more intelligent???

“good morning y/n, you look as beautiful as one of voiello’s paintings today :]”

“wait i thought that was a pasta brand”

he’s just trying to show you he can be mature and serious if you want him to

long story short, he’s not acting like himself (not that he’s childish, he’s just out of it) and you don’t like it, so you ask about it and wait for him to feel comfortable with sharing

when he does talk about it breaks your heart so much :((

you’re going to need some patience to try and show him you’d choose him, and not your bias, even if you had the chance

they’re completely different people and you love him BECAUSE he’s jisung, not for any other reason

please reassure him so he can go back to acting like his authentic self, i think it would be such a relief for him too

your words and affection are obviously enough for him, but if it ever happens that he feels especially low and insecure again, it would help if your bias talks to him too

and taeyong wouldn’t have a problem with it

actually, scratch that, taeyong probably knew what was going on all along

he just has that motherly 7th sense (ay) that is even more acute with the dreamies cus like

127 has him, wayv has kun, but dream has…

the dreamies

and that, my friend, is terrifying

anyway he’d come to talk to jisung asking like “what’s wrong buddy :(“ and sungie would be a bit ashamed because it sounds so silly when you say it out loud

of course tyong wouldn’t judge him, and he just really has to tell jisung what is it you and he are always talking about

it’s him

“when they come around to talk and hang out here it all goes back to you, jisungie. they can’t spend one second without mentioning your name

it’s so cute; it’s always like ‘oh jisung would love this’ or ‘jisung likes it that way’

so please be kinder to yourself and let yourself see that they’re in love with you, not with me and not with any other member they ever mention”

jisung would feel 10000000% better

and smiley

and giggly

and oh my god do you really talk about him that much

LOOK HE’S BLUSHING

would just go over to your house immediately and hug you, burying his face on your neck from behind you

and not let go

ever again

the whole situation just teaches him a lot about accepting your love for him and not questioning it

shut up i’m not crying

---

final notes: this was my first work after the humanity series and it was so fun lol i think next up is probs gonna be an ideal type scenario for ot23 (but if i really write it i’m gonna post it by subunit and its gonna be way shorter than this, don’t expect 23K words at once lmao)

if you’ve enjoyed this fic please consider reading my humanity series, which is a zombie apocalypse au with kun <3

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noa-nightingale · 2 years

Text

Unsolved’s Last Episode

What a journey it has been. And now it is over and I have to find ways to deal with that. So I decided to do what I do best, which is rambling about things I love, finding meaning in them and trying to get that meaning across in a way that is probably way too earnest and too emotional.

Let’s take a close look at the last Buzzfeed Unsolved episode, Return To The Demonic Sallie House.

I watched this alone. I stayed away from tumblr, twitter and discord on purpose. It was midnight in Germany when the episode aired and it was about 1 a.m. when I went to bed. I decided to go to sleep immediately after I watched the episode without talking to anyone about it, and that’s exatly what I did.

I wanted to cry but I did not manage to do it. I just lay in the dark, stared at the ceiling and had a lot of thoughts in my head.

So, let’s unpack this.

The Sallie House! Where it all started! And the second demon ep of the season! They really decided to go out with a bang.

I don’t know why I thought I would be able to get through this without getting my heart broken - it already started in such a wonderful, beautiful, sad way. Shane reading what Ryan said the last time at the Sallie House. The handshake. The trip via plane and car (loved that tiny bit of footage of their journey there). Shane making Ryan say “And now I’m back” with confidence.

“What a weird mix of emotions, to be sad, happy and horrified.” Lord, that hit me in the feelings. Ryan, I hope everything you went through and everything you experienced was worth it to you. And I really hope you know how much it means to people.

(I have my own weird mix of emotions attached to that episode now - sadness, excitement, joy, happiness, grief, gratefulness, love.)

I loved how they kept referencing the first investigation without making this episode feel like “just” a copy of it. It’s an entirely different vibe, a strong, fantastic episode in its own right and a worthy goodbye.

(And I also have to mention that little conversation about Shane laying on the pentragram. Look. Listen. I am asexual as hell. I am the most asexual asexual who has ever asexual-ed. I have not experienced one single sexual attraction in my entire life. It’s just not part of my experience. But putting yourself on a pentagram in the basement of a demon house while yelling “Rock’n’roll buckaroo” at whatever entity might listen - that is, respectfully and platonically, friggin’ sexy.)

“It just occured to me, we don’t really talk on the phone to like, just see what’s going on, because we see each other every day.” Oh dear God, it’s still happening. ^-^ I was reminded of the several times this has been brought up before - that they see each other more than any other person, that they spend a shitton of time together, and that even during quarantine they facetimed almost every day. Idk it just made me even sadder - they made memories together, went on this journey together, got closer as friends, grew as people; and now this show is over.

I am beyond grateful that Watcher exists and that Steven Lim (because goddamn, I love that guy) exists and that new memories will be made, but I am still so damn sad.

“It felt like the right time to leave on our own terms.” I am gonna ignore for now that he said this to a demon - I am just happy for them. This episode is such a great ending for such a great show, and I am glad they could do it on their own terms.

(Although I am a tiny bit salty that they apparently could not promote Watcher the way they should have been able to. Having to cut parts from the postmortem etc. But I once again have to give kudos to the Watcher fandom here; I have seen many people promoting the hell out of Watcher, and that is a beautiful thing.)

Ryan: “If that actually is a demonic presence in here, or Sallie, the thing that says it’s Sallie, can you turn the light on?”

(light switches on immediately)

Ryan: “Oh fuck off.”

I almost laughed out loud (had to stop myself, did not want to wake my roommate or my cat) but he said that in such a genuine, emphatic way and it was funny as hell.

“An audio recorder left in this room would later pick up the musical mobile playing by itself. Making this evidence even more compelling is the fact that seconds before the mobile plays, a white orb moves across the top right corner, just near the mobile that is out of frame.”

This narration brought to you by Ryan “Not An Orb Guy” Bergara. :p (I am not gonna razz him too much though - we know he presents evidence (or “evidence”, if you are a Shaniac) and then let’s the viewer decide what to make of it. He’s just reporting the findings. And yeah, I think that is admirable. Also, I know it has been said many times before but hats off to those guys for not faking evidence. Best ghosthunters in the world indeed, and I mean that.)

I also love that Ryan considers Shane a ghost cage (and an organic ghost cage, at that). Shane Madej, organic ghost cage. Put that on a lower third somewhere.

I generally don’t get that scared while watching Unsolved but the little girl turning into the demon thingy - the visual itself - is a tiny little bit disturbing when you watch this stuff at midnight. (I still slept soundly though lol. Did not have any nightmares.)

A thing that is just really endearing (and a little bit funny) to me is Shane sitting on the counter in the kitchen, with his long legs. Compare that to Ryan sitting on the table, with his little legs. ^-^

Also, compare Season 1 Ryan to Ryan now. He would never have mocked a demon in its own house and now look at him, drawing that portrait of Sallie. Yeah, I know it is silly but I am so incredibly proud of the guy.

Aand into the basement we go. And almost six years later, they are still a package deal. *noises of ugly crying*

He’s on the pentagram! I repeat, he’s on the pentagram!!! Never thought I’d see the day. Like, good God, this guy. The character development. The courage. I am blessed to be allowed to witness it.

AND THE BOYS ARE SALLIE APPROVED! GREATEST GHOSTHUNTERS IN THE WORLD! I AM SO DAMN HAPPY FOR THEM!!

That’s some well-earned cheering right there. Genuinely happy for them. Loved this moment.

We have reached Shane’s solo investigation and I got, once again, punched in the heart when Ryan said “So long, friend”.

And I know I am “just” watching Shane doing what Shane has done for all this series - being rude to demons and ghosts, yelling at them, telling them to do stuff to him and to wreak havoc. But it’s the last time now and it’s difficult to watch. I am happy for him - he defeated Annabelle, he defeated the Goatman and now he defeated Sallie.

“You’re a big nothing! You’re powerless in the face of the ghoul boys!” Hell yeah!!!

And, for the last time, they are doing the little dance of Shane telling Ryan he heard some spooky stuff that he did not actually hear. My heart can’t take it, it’s too much, I don’t want this to end.

Really enjoyed how Shane admitted that it is a spooky house (always has been, always will be). Like, that seemed like a genuine moment he had outside by himself there.

And now, Ryan’s time alone in the Sallie House.

I adore how brave Ryan as gotten, how he developed as a person, how things that would scare him in earlier seasons do not scare him as much anymore - but I have to admit, the moment in the kitchen when he told whoever was there not to show itself was fucking delicious. The fear in his voice. I don’t want this to sound mean but I adored that little moment.

“I am not my fear. I am stronger than my fear.” We love to see it. Genuinely.

I had to giggle when he started laughing maniacally by himself. I am sorry, it is just too hilarious and endearing at the same time.

And he went into the basement alone!!! <3 <3 <3

Shane: “How’d it go?”

Ryan: “It’s over.”

Shane: “It’s over.”

Ryan: “That’s how it went.”

Shane: “You ended it.”

Just... let me cry in peace.

I had to stop myself again from laughing out loud when Shane lay down with the two dolls next to him, aaannnnddd the framed pic of the ghoul boys near where Ryan slept was just a very nice little touch, honestly.

And it is over. It is morning, the “the investigation is done” music starts to play in the background and the series is complete.

... And Shane killed the spirit box. That happened too.

Before I write the last words here like Ryan said his speech at the end of the ep, let me just say: I loved this. I loved this entire episode. And I love these guys. From the bottom of my heart.

“You believed in us. And for that, I will always be grateful.”

I did. And I do. And many more people do too. And you made me cry. Thank you.

“And sure, we may have never definitively answered the question of Are Ghosts Real. But in the end, in perhaps fitting fashion for a show that finds resolution in the unresolved, all I can say is I’m sure glad we didn’t, because the pursuit and the friendship made along the way was far more fulfilling. I hope the ride was as joyous and full of discovery for you as it was for us. That being said, I ask you one last time: Are ghosts real? For now, and perhaps forever, the answer will graciously remain Unsolved.”

I hope you know how many lives you changed and how many joy and happiness you brought to people, both of you, and the rest of the team. I have seen many many people say how this show helped them through dark times, helped them make friends, made them happy, and was deeply deeply meaningful to them.

The same is true for me, I just never know how to adequately put it into words. This changed my life for the better. It was a light in dark times. It made me braver. It made me better. I can’t thank you enough.

And they could have ended it here, after the “Unsolved”. But nooooo, he had to say more heartfelt words and Shane had to say more heartfelt words and that was what truly made it real for me. It sank in at that point, that this is the end of an era and that this chapter of their life and this chapter of my life is over.

Ryan’s words just really touched me, and it also touched me how intently Shane listened. And Shane can’t tell me that he was not moved as well. Package deal, bond that can’t be broken, best ghosthunters in the world.

(And I would also like to report that while writing this, my dumb stupid eyes finally cooperated and I cried. Thanks for everything, guys. I will keep the memories with me forever while making new ones with Watcher, and I love you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.)

#buzzfeed unsolved #ryan bergara #shane madej #sallie house #watcher

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jjkyaoi · 3 years

Text

i’m surprised there’s not more ghost hunter!sbi au’s or just general paranormal!sbi au’s. anyway, take this.

(yes this is because i’ve been watching buzzfeed unsolved again recently, what about it)

wilbur’s the one with the main youtube channel, and before they started really doing paranormal shit it was mostly,,...,,, like his actual channel? just him doing dumb shit w/ his friends— yes he does play minecraft in this au. don’t ask me how he went from minecraft from hunting ghosts, it is something that none of us know.

techno’s the one who actually came up w/ the idea, because in the family he’s always been the one who’s been most obsessed w/ paranormal things, for a skeptic. he’s always constantly wanting to push the limits of things people aren’t sure actually exists— he always wants to see how fast he can die when he fucks w/ things that are potentially dangerous, so he’s a dumbass, and he brought up the idea of ghosthunting to wilbur, who’s also a dumbass & always accepts dumb ideas and plays them out, so of course he says yes.

the first ever paranormal video they did was a livestream! it was basically just wilbur and techno exploring this old abandoned house in their neighborhood that had rumors of paranormal experiences, and trying (and failing) to find ghosts. it was mostly just them fucking around; just techno calling out and taunting the air, daring it do something, and wilbur laughing nervously and telling him to “shut the fuck up” most of the time, but then eventually he’d get roped in and then it’d just end in w/ these dumbass twins just taunting the open air. ,,,,it didn’t go successfully. they didn’t find anything worth while, and they’d thought that’d be the end of it— that’d be the last paranormal video they’d ever make, but it turned out that their viewers really liked the concept & their general dynamic—the majority of them just liked techno, but shh—so they were like; “ykw,,,,why not. turn this into a thing” & then they did.

none of them are professionals. they’re sort of just taking the paranormal places they’d hear about at face-value and going there just to,,, scream and yell at open air?? eventually they do get more ‘professional’ and actually get the correct equipment and they do end up finding actual ghosts, but at first it’s laughable. take the whole ‘ghost hunters’ thing with fucking gallons of salt

before the paranormal videos started coming out, wilbur only ever really told stories about his family to the viewers— wilbur’s fans hadn’t met the sleepy boi’s yet, so these entire series is just wilbur’s fans getting to know ‘em, basically. ,,,,techno is a fan-favorite

at first it’s just wilbur and techno doing the ghost hunting, and the fandom had gotten used to those two and their general,,, shenanigans?? but for awhile, there was this conspiracy about who was the camera guy, in their videos? there were these theory videos, circling phil’s blurry image holding the camera in mirrors that they passed by in the places they went, “#CameraManConspiracy” was trending for like,,,. so long until wilbur and techno made a whole video revealing it and just went “oh yeah btw this is phil; he’s our dad and he records the videos so we don’t like. burn the places we go to down or somethin’”. everyone on the internet lost their fucking minds . phil actually showing up in one of their videos and talking was a pretty big demand for awhile until it actually happened, and ever since then he’s been known as dadza; the man who brings the camera and the common sense. (half the time, though, he’s just egging his son’s mischief on, but shh he’s the common sense).

tommy didn’t join their little group until like way, way later? in the paranormal videos he was just spoken about by phil, techno, and wilbur? he was more just an afterthought— just mentioned like ‘oh i bet tommy would hate this’ or ‘should i bring this home and show it to tommy?’ and everyone on the internet was like; ‘who the fuck is tommy’. he was one of the family members who’s arrival was like,,, really dragged out? the sleepy boi’s kept teasing him coming on, kept saying ‘well, he’ll come on eventually, when he wants to, be patient’ and for like months he did not ever show up, and the fandom theorized that tommy wasn’t even fucking real for a decent amount of time until, finally, he showed up.

it was a Q&A video, actually, where he showed up— their first and their last. they’d gotten a question about tommy—well, they’d gotten millions, but they just answered one—and they did this whole dramatic pause, looking solemn and saying ‘yeah, you got us, tommy isn’t real —’ and then tommy immediately burst into the room, screaming at the top of his lungs, and ran at the camera. that’s where the video ended. on twitter for days there were blurry screenshots of tommy’s form and the hashtag “#HE’SREAL???” was number 3 for days. he’s been apart of their group ever since

out of all of ‘em, techno’s the one who’s constantly at the forefront of taunting the ghosts. amongst the fandom, he’s known as the one who isn’t human, because of the fact the motherfucker always does shit that would kill the regular person, but he always comes out unscathed— half of the fandom thinks he’s possessed. he’s either taunting the ghosts or pranking tommy just to scare the shit out of him—who, always falls for it, despite how much he denies it—either that or he’s just in the background making jokes— motherfucker never takes it seriously.

wilbur’s the one who tries to take it seriously, but because he’s w/ these fools it always backfires on him. he’s always the one who’s asking the ghosts questions abt their personal life or doing theories about how they could’ve died, but in the end he’s always roped into some stupid shenanigans by his brothers and then just ends up taunting the ghosts. he’s known as the fandom’s conspiracy theorist— also, no one fucking knows if he actually believes in the ghosts or not??? man just makes theories. he’s more of the common sense than fucking phil is sometimes

phil is the camera man, as he’s established, but as well as wilbur he’s the one who communicates w/ the ghosts more often, and by that i mean the motherfucker is a ghost magnet. when the activity by techno and wilbur is always stagnant, on phil’s camera’s there’s always orbs caught by him, there’s always voices heard whispering by him— the ghosts seem to like him. half the time he’s just laughing behind the camera, but also the other time he’s trying to converse w/ the ghosts; he’s the only one who actually gets ‘em to speak and he’s never phased by any of it.

tommy is the one who’s the most scared out of all of ‘em, of course. motherfucker is always yelling, regardless if there’s something going on or not. he’s the type that thinks his increase in volume hides the fact that he’s scared, and he’s always challenging the ghosts to a duel or yelling ‘IM NOT SCARED’ only to piss his pants a second later. either that, or he’s wandering off ‘cause he got bored— there’s been more scenarios than the sleepy boi’s would like where they’ve lost tommy in the places they visit to. and, he ends up scaring himself even more when he gets lost. he’s also always the target for wilbur and techno’s pranks because he’s just that easy w/ paranormal shit

tubbo is also a pretty reoccurring character in the paranormal videos, but he doesn’t ever stay. he was first introduced by tommy, of course, coming onto the video as the ‘family friend’ (which is deadass just a roundabout way of saying he’s the unofficially adopted kid), and whenever he’s on their videos he’s also one of the most scared ones, but simultaneously,,, man constantly tries to talk to the ghosts? he gets scared by a too sudden sound or gets freaked out by the ghost stories, but a second later he’s in the corner fucking talking to,,, thin air? man’s known as the cryptid of the group. he constantly makes friends w/ the ghosts but it just looks like he’s talking to himself. (,,,, perhaps.,,,, tubbo can see,,,,, a little bit more of the paranormal world than we can? but that’s just spoilers)

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vanillann · 3 years

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unsolved (spencer reid x reader)

a/n: i was watching buzzfeed unsolved when i came up with this idea so enjoy. also i know it’s not exactly right but i didn’t feel like going back and watching the ep so.

warning: swearing, talk of cases, and sexual innuendos

word count: 3.3k

“Hi, Welcome to Buzzfeed Unsolved! We’re your host Ryan and Shane.”

I sat in a spin by chair between the two, my legs crisscrossed as I spun as fast as I could with Shane picking at arm.

“This is (Y/N)-“ when I heard my name I dramatically grabbed Ryan’s arm chair, smiling at the camera “a good friend of ours.”

“I had never spoken to either of them before today,” I spoke directly into the camera, the widest smile on my face when Shane gasped.

“She exposed us!” He pointed an accusing finger at me, Ryan slowly reaching out and grabbing his hand.

“We need her for this case,” Ryan spoke mysteriously, as if he was in a mob of some sort.

“Yeah why is that?” I rested my elbow on the chair, placing my chin in my open hand as I looked between the two.

I would normally be shoved in the corner of my desk trying to avoid another weird product video. I didn’t want to wear another weight blanket that made me almost fall to the floor.

“We are doing a case today and from the gossip around the office, you’d be pretty familiar with it,” Ryan said nothing more as he held a picture up to the camera.

I looked to the viewfinder, my eyes going wide as I recognized the mugshot immediately.

“That’s the Reaper!” I pointed at the picture, grabbing Ryan’s wrist so I could get a better look.

“Is that your boyfriend or something?” Shane added, looking over my shoulder at the picture in my hand.

“No, the BAU worked in this case!”

I didn’t know my intense knowledge of BAU cases would make it around the office, but I suppose when you have a printed article of you standing with Agent Gideon and Hotchner word moves fast.

“You actually know a lot about BAU cases from what I hear,” Ryan almost smirked at me and I was close to attacking him.

“Yeah-“ I turned to the camera, thinking I should explain myself before people thought I was crazy “so when I was young my mother had a stalker.”

The room suddenly went from light and breezy to scary and stuffy, something I hated.

“Anyways, when my mother died he disappeared into thin air. I then got an internship here at Buzzfeed and suddenly I was being mailed pictures of myself.”

I felt Shane give a knee a quick squeeze, which made me smile but I said nothing about it.

“It is really bad, I’m not going into detail, that the FBI got involved. Gideon was my savior that day, Hotchner too. Since then I’ve kept up with their cases and Gideon still sends me letters even after he left,” I finished my story, smiling down at the case file Ryan held between his fingers.

“Enough sad story, let’s talk about murder!” I clapped my hand, Shane laughing at my excitement.

“Okay, before we get started with this video I would like to clarify this isn’t a normal unsolved case. While the case was pinned to a murderer, the real unsolved piece is what happened to him,” Ryan got into character, slowly opening the folder and reading off the first words.

“On June 5th, 1996, Tom Shaunessy was called to investigate a murder in Boston. It was a couple, laided into their chair with multiple gun shots to their head and torso-“

“Wait, in the car in Boston?” Shane asked.

“That’s what I just read,” Ryan replied.

I smiled to myself, already knowing the editing that would take place with the black screen and the blue and yellow words floating across.

“Isn't Boston super busy?”

“It has like 700 thousand people,” I spoke up, wondering what color my words would be in.

“How do you just know that?” Ryan looked over his shoulder at me, his eyebrows raised.

“If you saw the article I was currently writing you would understand,” I shrugged, moving in the chair so I could get a better look at the case file.

Ryan coughed, looking back down at the file to continue.

“When another set of murders came in, this time an older couple, Shaunessy, panicked as he found the first victim, Harry Goodwill, watching at the scene.”

“That was his signature,” I held a hand up like a child in class, smiling as I already knew what came next.

“Bingo!” Ryan pointed to me, smiling at my excitement.

“When this happened again, this time alone woman, Shaunessy called in the BAU-“

“You mean the love of (Y/N) life,” Shane cut in, smiling when I hit his shoulder.

“If you saw a picture of them you’d be in love too,” I shrugged, not thinking much about my words.

“Agent Aaron Hotchner joined the team and worked closely on this case with Shaunessy.”

“So this man just texted the FBI,” Shane started laughing before he could get his words out.

“I’m pretty sure there are rules,” Ryan looked over at Shane, looking at me when we tried to understand why he was laughing.

“I’m sorry, death shouldn’t be this funny,” Shane took a breath, making a hand motion for Ryan to continue. I started laughing at that, keeping it low so Ryan could continue.

“After 18 murders, there were no leads. The only consistent thing was he mostly killed couples and he left an item from his last victim at the crime scene. The BAU conducted that he was most likely killing the couple because of his own failed marriage or possibly one close to him.”

“So he started killing because he hated to love? I bet he hates Valentine’s Day,” Shane shrugged, his smile breaking across his face when I spoke up.

“Nah, he seems more like a Halloween type guy,” I shrugged, laughing when Ryan hit his elbow on the table.

“Okay okay, back to the good stuff,” I pointed at the file, laughing when Ryan rolled his eyes.

“Now victims 19 and 20 is where the story starts to twist. Amanda Bertram and George Foyet-“ I shivered at the name “we attacked by the Reaper.”

“Did you say attacked?”

“Yes, while Amanda Bertram was killed in the struggle Foyet manages to survive with serious injuries.”

“So this dude just accidentally forgets to kill him?” Shane almost yelled, reaching for the file to read himself but Ryan moved it back.

“He saw the ghost of Valentine and just ran,” I played on the joke earlier, which made the two laugh.

“The heart-shaped boxes of chocolate really made him shit himself,” Ryan barely got the words out, his laugh slowly turning into a cough.

“We shouldn’t joke about a murderer when we don’t know his whereabouts,” I laughed along.

“Wait, you’re telling me they lost him!”

“Yep,” I popped the “p”, smiling when Shane looked to Ryan who only shrugged,

“You’ll have to wait and see.” Was all he said before he continued the case.

“After this no new leads were found, it was later discovered that The Boston Reaper sent Shaunessy a note that if the investigation was shut now he would stop killing,” Ryan read the words off.

“I bet he ended the letter with “xoxo from your worst nightmare” with a lipstick stain,” I spoke without thinking, covering my mouth when I realized what I said.

“Oh he’d definitely come at you now,” Shane pointed at me, wiggling his eyebrows in the process.

“No way! The BAU will save me,” I shrugged, smiling as I imagined the team busting in the door at the last minute like they always did.

“Oh yeah the one dude, what’s his name,” Ryan started snapping his fingers as he thought over his words “Sp-“

“Spencer Reid!” I practically yelled the name, my smile only growing large at the mention of the handsome Doctor from the BAU team. While he didn’t work my case, I heard a little about him and he called my house phone trying to reach Hotch.

To say I was infatuated would be a small understatement.

“Him?” Ryan pointed at him, smiling wider at me.

“Who is this Reid boy and what are his intentions?” Shane folded his arms on the table like a father, looking between Ryan and I.

“I hope it's dirty,” I blurted out, covering my mouth again as I looked at the camera.

“Cut that out,” I started laughing when I heard Shane wheezing beside me.

“No we’re keeping that, that was quality content,” Ryan was laughing, pushing my chair slightly as I slowly joined in.

“I’m so grateful he works a busy job and will never see this,” I started coughing, which made Shane pat my back.

“Please take the obsession back to murder, please and thank you,” I nodded to the case file once everyone has calmed down.

“Okay okay, the cast went cold after that. No new murders ever appeared and the BAU left the case.”

“Spencer went to (Y/N)’s house,” Shane commented quickly.

“Until 2009 when a murder took place right outside of Boston, a couple killed on a hill. While this seemed like nothing at first, an eye was painted on the side of the door and glasses were found on the victim’s face. The glasses belong to Foyet,” Ryan read in his special voice.

“So the dude got bored and was like “Fuck my promise”?” Shane looked between both of us.

“Let him finish,” I patted Shane shoulder, looking at the file again.

“It was later announced to the public that Shaunessy was dead,” Ryan read, looking at Shane with raised eyebrows.

“Ohh, you should have led with that!”

Ryan rolled his eyes, going back to the file in front of him.

“Hotchner took up the case with his BAU team-”

“Spencer had to leave (Y/N)’s house early to get there in time,' ' Shane pushed my shoulder, my finger slowly starting to play with the little ring on my finger.

“I wish,” I spoke up, smiling at Shane when he shook his head.

“The team quickly gathered all the information possible, slowly putting the eye signature on the car with the sign off on the letter.”

“He didn’t sign it xoxo?” Shane asked, I shook my head sadly.

“Sorry to get your hopes up,” I spoke gravely, my mask cracking when Shane started smiling.

“I was readying for him to sign A like that show!”

I started laughing, my hand covering my mouth as Ryan tried to explain the show he was talking about.

“Why do they have to be pretty liars, am I pretty when I lie?”

“No,” I said the words so seriously I was shocked with myself. We all three started laughing suddenly.

I hadn’t been at Buzzfeed long, I had only made a few friends and I pretty much got dragged into the video when they needed a test dummy. This was my first video that didn’t make me want to rip my eyes out, I actually was having a great time with Ryan and Shane with the jokes and all.

“Okay,” Ryan coughed, finally reading the file again,” Many tried to brush it off as a copycat but Agent Hotchner refused to drop the case.”

“That’s my bestie,” I smiled, remembering the photo I had with him when the local news decided to take pictures of us standing outside the station. The photo was awkward and I doubt he even remembered my case but I didn’t really care.

“Then a few hours later an older couple, Arthur and Diane Lanessa, were found stabbed and shot. When the earlier victim, Nina Hale, was found on Diane's wrist, people started to worry.”

“Wait I thought he left the one dude glasses, who is still weird to me,” Shane spoke up again.

“That’s what I’m saying! He had his glasses yet he’s a copycat? Cops can be so stupid,” I rambled, still pissed about that to this day.

“The BAU split up to find Foyet, who went into hiding after his attack, to get more details. Agent Hotchner and Agent David Rossi found him staying in a house in Boston.”

“Why would you stay in Boston?” Ryan was the one to speak this time, his nose scrunched up as he thought it over.

“Right, like yes I almost died here let me stay,” Shane mocked Foyet, which made me laugh.

“Later that night The Reaper boarded a busy bus and killed the occupants of it. Many had theories on why he changed his MO but nobody will confirm or deny.”

“I think he was made at Hotch,” I spoke up. I had thought about this alot.

“Why do you think that?”

“He didn’t quite like Shaunessy, I don’t blame Shaunessy, but still. He stuck around even when he could have walked away,” I crossed my arms, slightly proud of my theory.

“You think he gave the same deal?”

“You don’t?” I looked at Ryan, his arms shrugging before he went back to the case.

“There was a cryptic message left on the side the bus along with the Reaper eye,”

“Cryptic message? Is this real?”

“Unfortunately,” I nodded, looking back to Ryan as he spoke.

“The BAU managed to decipher the code into a line of Foyet addresses-”

“Spender did it!”

“And how would you know?” Shane looked to me, raising his eyebrow at me with a little smirk.

“Because he had an eidetic memory and has an IQ of 187,” I spoke proudly, as if I actually knew the person I was talking about. Okay maybe I searched them on the internet one too many times.

“How do you know that?” Ryan asked, laughing at me now.

“Google,” I shrugged, laughing when Shane looked up from his hands.

“What does he even look like?” I held up my finger, fishing my phone out of my back pocket. I quickly unlocked it, placing my thumb print and moving on, and tapped the searched bar. I quickly typed in his name, thankful it didn’t pop up in purple because I couldn’t handle that much teasing.

“Here,” I placed the phone on the table, laughing when Shane moved closer.

“He has a Wikipedia,” Shane looked over his shoulder at Ryan and I, speaking like a kid on Christmas.

“You both have Wikipedia,” I shrugged, not seeing the appeal of the whole life on display.

“You don’t,” Shane pointed out. I jokily pouted, acting all sad as I looked up to the ceiling.

“We can make you one,” Ryan patted my shoulder laughing when I smiled.

“Can we say I’m married to Doctor Spencer Reid?”

Both nodded at the same time, my hand going over my hand and I laugh at their telekinesis response.

“Okay finished this case so (Y/N) and I can stalk Mr. Reid,” Shane patted Ryan shoulder and I lightly smiled to myself.

He seemed like nothing but I finally made some friends, I mean friends I could talk to outside of work.

“Once they arrived at Foyet house they found gallons of blood pulled from the back of the house.”

“So they killed him?”

“Just wait,” I held my finger up, smiling when Shane deflated slightly.

“Multiple police were attacked, even Derek Morgan with the BAU. The specific are not out to the public but a nurse claimed that The Reaper stole Morgan credentials,” Ryan read off the paper, smiling when Shane gasped.

“That’s insane, this case is insane!”

I laughed along with Ryan, all of ours eye scanning over the paper now and we waited for the next bit of information.

“After looking over past cases filed, the BAU were confused on why The Reaper would kill Foyet. Their tech analysis did research to induce that Foyet had multiple aliases, claimed he had them to feel safe from The Reaper, actually had multiple assault charges, and his parents were killed when he was six.”

“Oh my, he killed them didn’t he!” Ryan and I both nodded, Shane’s hands flying up to his hair as he looked between us.

“It was him the whole time! No way!”

“That’s what I said,'' I looked into the camera for the first time in awhile, it felt nice and easy with them. The video was coming easy unlike trying to do awkward yoga poses with strangers.

“They managed to trace everything back to Foyet, concluding he was The Reaper. After more research, Foyet’s phone was tracked to Roy Colson's house. A journalist would recently wrote an article on The Reaper.``

“This feels like a Scooby-Doo mission at this point,” Shane sounded out of breath, looking to the camera with wide eyes.

“We got some work to do now!” I jokily sang the theme song, making the two laugh lightly before moving on to the end of the case.

“The local police arrest Foyet at the house, Colson thankful survived. Foyet was taken to prison immediately after arrest.”

“I thought they lost him?”

“If you don’t let him finish,” I joked, Shane laughed as we finally let Ryan finish.

“Foyet was found in his cell later throwing up blood and convulsions. As being rushed to the hospital, the ambulance was ambushed and Foyet escaped. No more information has been released on the whereabouts of Foyet.”

“They really lost him!”

Shane was in shock at the discovery, my hand covering my mouth quickly before I answered.

“I bet he’s working for the FBI, they hire people when they’re too dangerous.” I tried my best to be serious about the theory but I knew my smile was peaking thought.

“He’s probably the BAU’s personal hitman!”

I laughed with Ryan, my chair had slowly moved closer to his as I kept leaning to see the case file.

“Where do you think Foyet it?”Ryan spoke into the camera, talking to the people that would watch this in a few weeks.

“I think (Y/N) should call her smarty-pants husband and ask,” Shane spit out his last joke before the video ended.

“Yeah, Doctor Spencer Reid please call me with information about the case.” I pointed into the camera like Uncle Sam and winked dramatically.

“He doesn’t have your number,” Ryan reminded me. I let my finger fall, thinking over my words before I pointed back at the camera.

“Email my business email,” I nodded. Shane and Ryan both hit my shoulder. both hands going to my arm to cover them.

“Say bye to our favorite guest ever,” Ryan waved in my face.

“Bye!”

I laughed as the video played on my laptop, laughing when my voice was replaced with light green words floating on the screen. I scrolled down lightly, reading a bunch of comments. I smiled when most were asking if I would ever be on another Unsolved.

My phone went off beside me, my hand reaching for it as I paused the video and moved to my email. I was waiting for an email about an article I was writing and I couldn’t stop hitting refresh.

Shane: i’ve seen two ship edits of (y/n) and spencer reid on my instagram already

Ryan: i saw an edit of shane fall out a chair

I laughed at the messages, the group chat the three of us had formed titled “The Reapers Bitches” never stopped as we had grown a close bond.

I heard the little ding from my laptop, also most screaming when I slammed the refresh button and screamed when I saw an email with a little unread dot beside it.

I didn’t think twice, pushing the email and reading over it quickly.

From: [email protected]

Hello, this is Doctor Spencer Reid with the Behavioral Analysis Unit. I recently saw a video of you mentioning me and my team about a case we worked on a few years back. While I legally can’t share any details with you in this case, I would be open to speaking with others. Please email me back!

I was going to scream, maybe cry, maybe both at this point. I read the email two or three more times, trying to comprehend what I just read.

He did see, shit he did see it. I heard my phone going off beside me, my hand picking it up and typing without reading what they were saying before.

Me: Spencer Fucking Reid just emailed me

I let my phone fall to my lap, reading the email one more time.

“Thank you Buzzfeed Unsolved,” I whispered under my breath.

join the taglist!

permanent taglist:

@kittykylax @itstaylorcale @head-over-heart @marvel-rhapsody @accioxtina @always-spaced-out @carnations-red @onetoomanyfilms @suranne-doesstuff

criminal minds taglist:

@underscorecourt @meowimari @mggsprettygirl

#spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #spencer reid/you #spencer reid/reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds x reader

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iprefertheterminsane · 3 years

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I've just watched half an hour worth of BuzzFeed Worth It Adam Bianchi content and now I'm obsessed with the idea of the Try Guys Camera Crew, BuzzFeed Unsolved Camera Crew and Worth It Camera Crew being exchanged.

Here's what I understand;

BUN

The steady constant on set camera crew is TJ, Devon and Mark. TJ and Mark are firm Shaniacs, and Devon is a skeptic believer. Personality wise, TJ is very fatherly of Ryan on set. He is constantly very concerned. Devon is production manager, meaning she has to be ridiculously strict to make sure the boys keep their bits in check and proceed to the next part of the art according to schedule, and Mark is usually just very very stoic

HOW THEY INTERACT

Outside of communicating for B-roll of the set and schedules, they the ones that LEAST interact with the boys on camera. Silence is essential on most their investigations, and I imagine when you're dealing with ridiculous men discussing horrifying murder and supernatural stories in dark, decrepit places with horrifying histories, you would need a strong gut, steel balls and the ability to keep stoic in the funniest and/or most horrible situations. Ryan and Shane barely acknowledge them on camera (which is how there are parts of the BUN fandom aren't even aware of their names and existence and their ridiculously tight bonds with the boys.) After TJ was let off BuzzFeed in January 2021, he was taken very quickly in by Watcher.

WORTH IT (namely Adam Bianchi)

He is on the medium side between Try and BUN, in a way that shows he VISIBLY interacts with Andrew and Steven, but not so much in a way that's essential to the show like the Try Crew. He is also the most obviously pampered, as he is brought to most travels and fed the fanciest foods. He's like the fluffed up persian kitten.

TRY GUYS

Y'all TRY GUYS camera crew are not only the ones MOST visibly interactive in camera, they're most essential too. It's legitimately Very Big and Varied and I Cannot Remember all of them. They react to the boys; make jokes, contributions, almost always shows up on camera...they have that habitual pressure of making noise and interacting to keep their boys going. Unlike Adam, and the BUN crew, their set don't always require traveling, which lends them the luxury of familiarizing themselves with the place and setting cameras; to get comfortable and spread out, while the BUN crew make do with mostly GoPro footage from the boys, and Adam with the handheld monstrosity.

Can you imagine the chaos if the Try Camera Crew has to keep quiet and follow the boys in places like the Sallie House, getting B-roll alone in places like Eastern State Penitentiary? Adam's habitually a quiet person, who is constantly being well fed in nice places. How the fuck are the Try Guys supposed to deal with a high maintenance bitch like that? Steven and Andrew are probably going to best get along with the BUN crew, though i imagine it will be slightly off kilter and uncomfortable, considering how they won't be very used to being on footage a lot.

#i am thinking #writing prompt #tj marchbank #devon #Mark #Shane Madej #Ryan Bergara #Steven Lim #andrew ilnyckyj #Watcher #BuzzFeed Unsolved #BuzzFeed Worth It #Try Guys #Eugene Lee Yang #Zack Kornfield #Ned Fulmer #Keith Habersberger #Adam Bianchi

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thebookwormfairy · 4 years

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Buzzfeed Unsolved Part 3

Here's my contribution for Spooky season. This will be mainly class salt but there will be a little bit off the maribat team we love and their usual antics

Lila couldn't believe it

The whole point of pushing Marinette out of class life was to isolate her enough so that Lila would be the new class favorite but not enough that she'll leave

Who was suppose to to provide the class with free sweets and plan all the class outings and events

But here Lila was listening to Ms. Bustier as she made the announcement

Ms. Bustier: please take your seats class. We're going to hold elections for Class Representative

Alya: Shouldn't we wait for Marinette, Ms. Bustier? I mean she's the only one running right?

The rest of the class made sounds of agreement and nodded their heads

Lila tried not to roll her eyes

Ms. Bustier: Marinette will actually no longer be joining our class

Class: WHAT?!

Ms. Bustier: Marinette has been given a great opportunity to go to Gotham Academy one of the top rated schools in the world

Lila seeing a opportunity to spin this in her favor decided to speak up

Lila: So Marinette decided to abandoned us, even though she knew we counted on her. I mean who's going to help with costumes, or babysitting, or give us bake goods?

Alya: That's a good point!

Nino: This is going to mean we're going to have to cut down on our dates

Mylene: Oh no! The next school play is going to be a disaster without Marinette's costumes!

Adrien: How could Marinette just abandon us like this! It's not like her!

Ms. Bustier: Okay class calm down. We don't want any akumas now. Let's focus on the election for the next class representative. Are there any volunteers?

Unsurprisingly Chloe's hand shot up

Ms. Bustier: okay we have Chloe, anybody else?

Alya: how about you Lila? You'd make a great representative

Lila: Oh no I'm far to busy with all my volunteering and obligations, but you should definitely do it Alya. You were Marinette's deputy after all

Alya raising her hand: You're right? I mean how hard could it be?

Alya learned exactly how hard it is when she won the election and was told all her new duties

Alya: Are you serious? Marinette never brought any of these up to me

Ms. Bustier: She didn't want to cut too much into your time

It took awhile but Alya finally got the hang of things

Though none of the class events were as extravagant as when Marinette was in charge

She made Nino her deputy hoping it would give them more time together

And it did but it also meant that a lot of her paperwork was late meaning the class couldn't do as much stuff

But did the class blame Alya for this?

They blamed Marinette

Because somehow it was her fault that Alya were too wrapped up in her boyfriend to actually do her job

A couple of months later Lila and Alya watched the Ghoul Gang's (a/n: That's Marinette, Damian, and Jason's group name) first video that somehow had 10k views and already had 25k subscribers

Alya: How is she so popular?

Lila: How does she have so many views?

Alya: How does she have more hits then the Ladyblog?!?

They started scrolling through the short list of other videos that was posted

Adrien: Oh are you watching Marinette's videos?

Alya: You knew about this?

Adrien: Yeah it's not really my taste but I want to support our friend dont you guys?

Lila making her eyes tear up: Why would we want to support somebody who abandoned us

Alya wrapping her arms around Lila: Yeah Adrien she makes a good point. Marinette didn't even say goodbye!

Adrien trying to placate the two: Maybe she didn't have a chance

Lila: Oh please if she really wanted to she would had MADE time to say goodbye, right Alya?

Alya: Yeah!

The two girls showed the rest of the class the videos

And they had to admit they liked them

They were fun to watch and it was nice to see the old Marinette again

Lila could see this and it made her seeth

She had to turn this to her benefit

And she knew just how to do it

Lila: I can't believe you guys would support Marinette! It's obvious that she's just bragging and showing off her new life!

Chloe: I can't believe I'm saying this but Lila's right! It's obvious that Dupen-Cheng is just rubbing her new life in our faces! It's utterly ridiculous!

Alya hated that she agreed with Chloe but she also spoke of her agreement

Some of the other classmates agreed with them, but others like the member of Kitty Section and Nathaniel just thought that Lila and Alya were still a little hurt that Marinette left and Chloe was just jealous

They decided they would still watch the show just not talk about it with the rest of the class

A year later and Lila couldn't stand how popular Marinette's little YouTube channel was

She also couldn't stand that she had a richer boyfriend then her own, Adrien

So with the help of Alya, Nino, and of course her boyfriend Adrien they decided to do their own show

That was SLIGHTLY similar (read: rip off) of the Ghoul Gang's own show

They had Lila and Adrien as the host

Because of course they had to be the host, they were models and had more experience on camera

Nino did all the camera work

And Alya did research and worked sound

A lot of people called them out for being an obvious ripoff of the Ghoul Group's show from their name to their editing

But what people found worst that they were a bad ripoff

Lila and Adrien didn't have the same chemistry as Marinette and Jason

Adrien just agreed with whatever Lila said

There was no fun banter

And because neither of them believed in ghost there were no funny freakouts

Their show was mostly watched just for ripping on

Which both Alya and Lila hated

How could Marinette be so popular!

Lila just had to find some way to prove that her show is superior to Marinette's

And she learned the purest opportunity when she saw Marinette and the rest of the Ghoul Gang filming on some random street

Marinette: now we're back the next day at Rue Des Chantres after our terrifying investigation last night

Jason: What are you talking about it Thumbelina? It wasn't scary here last night. We even ran into the local heroes.

Damian: Which we'll be showing in a special bonus video at the end of our Paris series.

Marinette: Thanks Damian. And it was to scary. Remember what we heard on the spirit box, Green Giant?

Jason: Beep dop ga Apple tatter cre mauf

Marinette: No the other thing

Jason: Do you think we could make apple taters? Could that be a thing?

Damian: Focus Todd

Marinette: Anyway thanks for watching and join us next time to see us explore the famous catacombs under Paris. And for now weither the Rue Des Chantres is haunted will remain...

Marinette/Jason: Unsolved

Damian: And cut! Great job guys!

Marinette going over to hug Damian: Thanks honey. Great job filming as usual

Marinette gave Damian a peck on the lips

Jason: Seriously are Apple tatters possible? They sound good

Marinette: Maybe we can do some experimenting when we get back to the bakery.

Jason pumping his fist: Awesome!

Damian: We just have to finish on time to head to the catacombs. You wouldn't believe what I had to go through to get the catacombs to ourselves tonight

Jason laughing: Calm down demon spawn besides this will be a nice bonus video

The trio walked away and Lils felt a smirk grow on her face

If she and her lackies could best those losers to the catacombs they could have a episode before them and it would look like they ripped off her group instead of the other way around

Later that night the Ghoul Group showed up at the Catacombs fully expecting to be let in only to be stopped by secruity

Secruity: Sorry folks the catacombs are close tonight. Apparently their filming something tonight

Lila looking smug: Yes that will be us we're the Ghoul Group.

Secruity: I'm sorry but the filming permit is under the name Damian Wayne. Is that one of you?

Alya: No, but their must he some mistake. Lila said she called and we were clear to film here tonight

Secruity: Sorry but without a permit you can't film here. Please move along

Lila: How dare you?! Do you no who I am?

Marinette from behind the group: No, but I do

Alya, Lila, Adrien, and Nino turned around to see Marinette, Damian, and Jason standing behind them

Damian walked forward to show secruity his ID

Alya, Nino, and Adrien: MARINETTE!

Marinette: Why are you trying to steal our filming location?

Alya: Why did you abandon us?

Marinette: What are you talking about?

Alya: You abandoned us! You left without saying a word! Who did you expect to pick up the slack after you left?! Who did you expect to do costumes for the school play, or run fundraisers or babysit Chris or the twins?! You completely left us in the lurch

Marinette felt any guilt about leaving without telling anybody melt away

Marinette glaring: I thought that the people who I thought were my friends only saw me as an employee, and you just proved it

Ayla rolling her eyes: What are you talking about Marinette? You're being over dramatic as usual

Marinette: That is what I'm talking about! Think back to the final couple of months I was in Paris. The only time anybody in the class talked to me was to ask me to do something for them, not even asking if I have time to do it just demanding that I complete what ever they wanted me to do! And you know what leaving was the best decision I ever made!

Marinette didn't wait to hear what Alya had to say she joined Jason and Damian at the entrance and followed them inside never giving thought to the friends she left behind again

3 months later the Ghoul Group broke up.

After Lila was shown to be working with Hawkmoth she was sent to juvenal hall

Lila, Nino, Adrien, and the rest of the class were left wondering how they could lose such a great friend because of a liar who tricked all of them

#maribat #damian x marinette #halloween #marinette x damian #buzzfeed unsolved au #maribat unsolved #daminette

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pepperful-qt · 4 years

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Hi there! Can I request hcs of kuroo, kita and semi with a big brain s/o? It doesn't just apply to s/o academically, but more so about life in general (like having ~streetsmarts~) thank you!

you said street smarts my mind went to jj bittenbinder. ngl i kinda used the wisdom proficiencies from d&d as reference for this hahaha nerd i hope it’s what you want! also i just want to thank you for requesting my not-so-secret fav semi semi

Kuroo, Kita, & Semi with a big brain s/o

* * * * *

Kuroo Tetsuro

oh this man appreciates it. he’s so entertained

you know that drinking game that Tyrion does with Shae where he guesses something about your past and if he’s right you have to drink, if not he does? that’s what you do minus the drinking part obv,, unless

as a person with high charisma himself, you make it a game to see who can bluff out and/or fool the other (you almost always win)

any time there’s a game night and you’re playing a social deception game you always win. no one can get a lie past you

if it’s a teamwork one, you and Kuroo crush everyone else

you find ways to skimp on your hw but still come out fine. he has no idea how, and it both annoys and impresses him

“i thought you stayed up watching buzzfeed unsolved instead of studying last night??”

“yeah so what?”

“but you got a 96%”

he knows that intelligence isn’t just defined by what you’re able to memorize out of a book, and you’re a perfect example of that. he respects you a lot

you’re the type of person that reads random articles and therefore has the most random bits of trivia that you throw in conversation

he can have an intellectual conversation with you, since you always come up with unique perspectives. he loves asking your opinion on things, bc who tf knows what’ll come out of your mouth

you don’t know what a derivative is to save your life but you know the location of every 7/11 in a ten mile radius, and if they carry a specific type of onigiri or cup noodle flavor

but fr you give the best advice and are always there to lend an ear

you watch murder mystery movies together and try to figure out the culprit, sometimes actually arguing over it

other times you’ll watch a drama and make bets on who’s gonna do what or end up with who

rip Kenma in the corner just trying to live his life

it’s hilarious seeing you interact with someone who is not “big brain” or street smart

let’s just use Lev as an example for no particular reason, just bc

you quickly learned that Lev would believe almost anything you said, he was that fascinated by your apparent wisdom

so you and Kuroo will sometimes join forces and see what you can get him to believe. you once convinced him that if you kill an insect you’d become that insect in your next life and die the same way, and for a solid month he would start crying if he ever stepped on an ant

chaos couple™

you have this whole atmosphere about you that is just “do not fuck with me” bamf if i do say so myself

which tbh is one of the things he finds most attractive about you. you knew exactly what he was up to the first time he started flirting with you, but you weren’t intimidated one bit. you became a challenge~

10/10 best looking couple of the three

* * *

Kita Shinsuke

the two voices of reason, bless you both. you’re very similar, but also very different

he’s the definition of high intelligence & high wisdom with low charisma cleric kita omg, while you have both high wisdom and high charisma with an intelligence stat you barely use (high or low lol)

he’s the kind of guy who always thinks things through with logic, and he’s always sure of his decisions

you on the other hand, have an intuition based logic

freaks him out when you rely on your gut instinct but somehow it always pays off

“why?”

“just because”

“but why??”

you’re adaptable in almost every situation, always know what to say, and have an uncanny ability to read people

which actually comes in handy in your relationship

he’s not the best at expressing himself but you always seem to know his emotional state and thought process, something no one else except his granny has really cracked yet and you do it so easily. sometimes he wonders if you’re a mind reader

you knew he liked you before he did & you asked him out first ~

“Shin-kun, you look happy today!”

“Ah, I was able to clean all the volleyballs after practice and still had time to fold and organize the scrimmige vests by color.”

meanwhile Atsumu: “hE litERALLY?? looks the sAME??!”

speaking of the twins, you’re great at handling them

Atsumu tried to scare you away the first time you showed up at practice before you and Kita announced your relationship, but you were calm and polite

which tbh put him off more than if you’d clammed up or gotten angry. he almost felt bad for being rude. almost.

imagine how bad he felt when Kita found out

the both of you are both feared and respected by the team

you’ll help Kita out with his self-assigned chores sometimes, figuring out new ways to be efficient and not lose quality

he also loves how he can trust you to take care of yourself, whether it’s walking home alone or losing you in a crowd or just looking after your health. he still worries and dotes on you but it’s out of love, not because he’s concerned you’ll hurt yourself unintentionally

he loves a person with common sense @ inarizaki

you’re both really good at getting gifts for each other, since you’re both very perceptive

one time you guessed his favorite flavor of ice cream and it made the butterflies a’flutter

there’s this silent competition between you two of who can give the better gifts

wishes you would study more though ngl. he knows you’re smart you just don’t always dedicate that intelligence to your schoolwork

he finds it charming how you’re always looking at things from different angles rather than the straightforward path. he thinks it’s a very good quality

that “yeah but what if...” kind of mentality

we already know he appreciates that attitude if he doesn’t really take it on himself

you’re both able to appreciate the nuances of life and enjoy the moment together

your relationship is one of the most balanced and strong out there tbh,,

* * *

Semi Eita

you’ve got this charm that makes people respect you. a certain type of confidence, if you will, that made him first notice you

lots of students were intimidated by the members of the volleyball team, for their height and reputation etc, but you never showed any reservation, not even with Ushijima

as well as your conviction, you have take no shit attitude that comes in great handy with certain members of the team it’s also hot af

you can banter with Tendou and you provoke Goshiki all day long but never Shirabu bc you know what’s up

you do however irritate him with mind games, bc you know he’s a little shit who stole your bf’s spot and needs to be taken down a peg sometimes

you: *describing the quantum wave trolley problem”

Shirabu: *screams*

all the while Semi is trying and failing to hide the smug little smirk on his face

with Semi though, you’re able to just talk

he enjoys conversation with you bc he’s never bored. you make him think and you make him laugh, both good things

sometimes you’ll point something out that just makes him go “oh” bc it seems so obvious when you point it out

other times it’s something so outlandish that he can’t help but crack a smile or let out a laugh

sometimes it’s the connect the dots meme “you didn’t connect shit” lmao

again, solid advice giver with no holds barred. anyone who needs to be straight up told what they need to hear comes to you, bc you're usually right

and Semi himself can get lost in his own head so it's nice to have you to ground him

you’re decent in your classes sure, but where you really impress is your strategy in game. any game

once you were invited to play laser tag with the team and you whipped out a battle plan that annihilated the other team

alternatively, you show no mercy in monopoly or uno, damn your relationships

it’s actually very annoying how quickly you pick up the rules and nuances to games and use them to your advantage

if you’re both very competitive, it’s usually better for everyone if you’re both on the same team

but he likes a challenge heh

okay, we know he’s bad at dressing himself when it comes to casual outfits. no common sense. you notice this too

“Eita, sweetie, if you go out like that you will get mugged,, even in Miyagi.”

you’ll walk down the street hand in hand and you make random guesses or stories about the people you see

“that guy is totally a scammer” or “bet that lady looking at the papaya is trying to start a diet for the third time, look at her face” and he’ll chuckle

he knows there’s always something going on inside your mind and he wants to know

when you’re lost in thought he’ll tap your forehead

“hey what’s going on in there?”

he enjoys listening to your musings and thoughts and opinions. you either have a crazy gut instinct or have some unique thought you’ve internally debated over for months

gets inspiration from you actually, even if he doesn’t realize it

likewise, you realize he has a lot on his mind he doesn’t say, but you have a way of making him say it, even if he is hesitant and abrasive at first

you’ll call him at 3am with a random thought and he’ll grumble a bit but actually will listen to you with the smallest smile on his face

* * * * *

i hope??? this was good??? also lmk if this is too long without a read more i’m not sure :P

#kuroo tetsuro #kita shinsuke #semi eita #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kita shinsuke x reader #semi eita x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #kuroo x reader #kita x reader #semi x reader #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu writing #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu headcanons #the way i got so excited seeing my boy semi on here #don't look up the quantum wave trolley problem unless you want your brain fried

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