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free--therapy · 1 year

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How to Find Happiness: 5 Tips to Help you Find True Happiness

By Ali | Published on February 21, 2022

Is happiness the ultimate human goal? Our search for that elusive happiness state leads us to a never-ending list of books and articles. But we sometimes look for happiness in the strangest of places. Have you ever searched for happiness at the bottom of a bottle? Or perhaps in a nicer car? Maybe you thought happiness would present itself with a new house or job. Does this type of happiness last?

There are an infinite number of resources telling us where to find happiness. But do these articles actually know us? Do they take our nuances and idiosyncrasies into account? If happiness could be prescribed in a pill, how many of us would line up to take it?

Let’s dive in and discuss how you can find your own happiness. I am not here to tell you to emulate the things I have done that have brought me happiness. I want to guide you to look deep into yourself to find your own happiness.

What is happiness?

Happiness is a feeling of joy and fulfillment. That blissful contentment that brings us internal peace. But here’s the kicker. We are perpetually in different fluctuations of happiness. Happiness is not a destination, it’s a journey.

Happiness is interlinked with our sense of living a life we are satisfied with. One which brings us fulfillment. So, to find happiness we must first find fulfillment and satisfaction.

The path to fulfillment looks different for everyone.

Mine involves lots of animals, no children of my own, authentic friendships, and plenty of running. Yours might be centered around parenting. Someone else may find their happiness in activism. There is no wrong or right.

Two types of happiness

We can split happiness into what I perceive as acute and chronic. Aristotle distinguished between two very different types of happiness.

Hedonia

Eudaimonia

Veronika Huta clarifies the differences between these two approaches by suggesting that a hedonic orientation involves actively seeking happiness, positive affect, life satisfaction, and reduced negative affect.

Whereas a Eudaimonic orientation is more concerned with seeking authenticity, meaning, excellence, and personal growth

Let’s explore these terms in a little more detail.

Hedonia

Hedonia is not dissimilar to the word hedonistic. In fact, these words share linguistic lineage. Hedonia happiness is pleasure-driven. It is preoccupied with what feels good in the moment. Seeking enjoyment and satisfaction.

This is linked to the euphoric feelings associated with food, drugs, alcohol and sex. But it is also linked with self-care such as exercise, yoga and meditation.

Eudaimonia

Eudaimonia is concerned with seeking meaning and purpose in life. From working towards long-term goals to being concerned for others' wellbeing and nurturing. Eudaimonia brings a sense of satisfaction and happiness from fulfilling responsibilities and finding value in life.

This makes me think of striving to better ourselves, perhaps serving our community through voluntary work.

How do we measure happiness?

And herein lies a little problem. Happiness is subjective. Historically in order to measure it, we have relied on self-reporting through questionnaires.

There is an interesting modern study that uses technology to measure happiness. It introduced a “Happimeter” which uses a smartwatch to gather data such as heart rate and timely feedback from the wearer.

The fascinating thing with this is they found that measuring happiness actually increased happiness. Perhaps the process of bringing happiness to the subject’s attention made it a more pertinent thing for them to focus on. Perhaps they strived to see their happiness levels increase on their Happimeter. Either way, it has to be a good thing.

The secrets of the happiest person on the planet

I couldn’t help but wonder who the happiest person on the planet is.

Capitalism will have you believe it was someone wealthy. Large consumer organizations will tell you it is someone who drives their car, wears their trainers, eats their food, or uses their magic skin lotions.

But actually, the happiest person in the world apparently is Matthieu Ricard, a Tibetan Monk.

For 12 years Matthieu had hundreds of sensors attached to his brain whilst he meditated. This operation was led by Richard Davidson, a neuroscientist from Wisconsin University.

The results were staggering. They showed abnormal and unheard-of activity in his left prefrontal cortex. This allowed him a greater capacity for happiness and also served to reduce his propensity for negativity.

Now, this is where things get interesting. Matthieu puts his happiness down to his benevolence. He is a passionate executioner of altruism. In fact, he believes when we focus too much on ourselves, we invite stress into our lives.

So, in short, the kinder we are, the happier we are. This is supported by a scientific study that suggests that kind people experience more happiness and have happier memories.

Best of all, Matthieu suggests that all it takes to be happy is to think good and happy thoughts for 10 minutes a day. Try it.

5 tips to help identify and find your own happiness

When we join up all the dots of this article, there is a clear distinction between types of happiness.

We have acute happiness which is perhaps short-lived, represented by Hedonia. And we have chronic happiness, represented by Eudaimonia. Our happiest man in the world taps into Eudaimonia happiness with his benevolence, kindness, compassion and altruism.

With this in mind, here are 5 tips to help you identify and seek out your own happiness.

1. Be your authentic self

Follow your own yearnings. Who are you? Live a life true to yourself. How do you feel? What does your heart seek? Dance to the beat of your own drum.

There is sometimes a paradox between our innate need to fit in whilst also desiring to stand out. We want to be part of the group, but we also want to celebrate our differences. We strive to keep the authenticity of being ourselves. Interestingly scientists confirm that following our authenticity leads to greater wellbeing. We can quench our need for belonging by finding community groups of interest.

When we try to be someone we are not, we won't end up finding happiness.

This has taken me a while to practice. For a decade or so I was a bit lost. Perhaps I followed the crowd to try and fit in. To seek approval and popularity. But this didn’t bring me happiness.

I am slowly seeping into my own skin. I may not be the most popular person anymore. But I am the happiest I have ever been. I am learning to be unapologetically me!

2. Find your purpose and passion

Find your own purpose and passion. Does it involve the arts or sport? Maybe you feel your purpose is in helping rescue animals or in the nursing of the sick. Perhaps you are passionate about educating children or fighting for human rights.

Whatever your own sense of purpose is, find it. Explore it, and commit to it with all of your heart.

I co-founded a dog running club. This year is its 10th anniversary. Whilst I am no longer part of the club, I take great pride in it as my legacy. I dedicated many years of my life to helping people get fit and have fun with their dogs.

For a long time, this was my key life purpose. It was an overarching passion and made me find happiness.

Our purpose and passion can evolve over time. The important thing is we find our calling and put energy into it.

3. Find a community where you belong

Working in your local community is a sure way to find happiness. Giving back through voluntary work has been proven to increase our own happiness and sense of wellbeing. Not only are we helping others when we volunteer, but we are helping ourselves.

Perhaps you have a skill you can take into your community. Could you offer your services as a befriender? Or maybe you can help at a local charity shop.

I volunteered for a week at a camp for terminally ill children. The sense of fulfillment and purpose I felt was overwhelming.

When we do good, we feel good.

4. Meditate

I have heard that if you only have time to meditate for 10 minutes, then you actually need to meditate for 20 minutes.

The truth is, I don’t habitually meditate. I want to and I know it will bring immeasurable benefits into my life. But my mum used to describe me as having “ants in my pants”. I struggle to stay still for any length of time. All the more reason for me to commit to a daily meditation practice.

A daily meditation practice increases our feelings of positivity, reduces our symptoms of illness, increases our connection with ourselves and others, and promotes our overall well-being.

So, if I promise to start a meditation habit, will you join me? If this is the secret of the happiest person in the world, then it must be worthwhile.

5. Be kind to others

I believe kindness is the most important attribute any person can have. Kindness is my superpower. I have recently learned that being kind does not require self-sacrifice. Sometimes a true test of our kindness is in showing kindness to ourselves.

In this manner, I have learned to let go of decomposing friendships. It has taken me 40 years, but I now recognize the importance of meeting my own needs.

Be kind to yourself. Forgive yourself for past regrets, and speak to yourself with compassion. Help other people with your words and your actions. But when something is no longer bringing you joy or happiness, give yourself permission to let it go.

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unknownusernumber13 · 2 months

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Mortal Minds

This story was originally written based off the provided prompt below. I decided to continue that story because I fell in love with the characters, and couldn't stop thinking about how their story could possibly continue. I took the original post, made a few changes, and added to it so it could have a more complete beginning. Enjoy :)

Chapters will be posted in separate parts.

"A family has been trying and failing to kill you, an immortal, for many generations. In fact, it’s been going on for so long you forgot why they started hunting you in the first place."

~Introduction~

Have you ever felt like you had forgotten something important? Like you're missing a key part of yourself, and won't be fully complete until you remember what it is? Well, that's my whole life. I've spent a very long time trying to find my missing piece. And trust me, I've had plenty of time. But that time has been consumed by pain, loss, and a whole pile of unsavory treasures. Stuff like that tends to happen when you're immortal, like me.

Being alive as long as I have, you would think I would have made many mistakes, and you'd be right. In fact, my so called "crimes" can be seen throughout history, although most of them go unnoticed. You might also think I've made enough enemies to last multiple lifetimes. Sorry to disappoint, but I have had only a few small disagreements with people that had little impact on historical events.

For example... I was once banned from this small local pub, somewhere in the middle of someplace that probably goes by a completely different name by now, because I claimed the owner needed a shower. I only made the comment in the first place because he complained about business being slow. I thought paying better attention to his personal hygiene would bring back customers. Not exactly my brightest moment, but I was young.

At least, I think I was young.

But never mind that, not the point. Being literally thrown out the front door, I crashed into a fellow lone traveler and broke the priceless vase he was holding into a million pieces. Turns out he was running from the current form of law enforcement, and was captured because of me. Well, me, and my poor choice of words.

The stolen artifact was lost and, overtime, completely forgotten. It could have been labeled as "priceless" for many reasons, but I suppose it really didn't hold any true value after all.

The same can be said for me, and anything else I managed to accomplish in the past. In the end, I was also forgotten. I'm just another artifact that collects dust in the corner. I don't have any real value.

Basically, forgotten people of no worth don't often have friends. So, how could a ghost of the past have fierce enemies?

And now, I'm simply a corpse. A living proof of dead memories, my figure being the only reminder. Anyone who really bothered remembering me is gone, and I currently live in the shadows of those around me. No one remembers, and no one takes notice.

However, there's one particular group of people that always take notice, and they never forget. Many have died, but their words of hatred live on throughout generations. Their clear disliking of me has been the only certain fact I've always been able to rely on. Sometimes I think of them as being the only people who really know me. If they weren't constantly trying to take my head off, I might think of them as close friends. That, or the world's best stalkers. No matter where I go, or who I become, they're always there.

That leads us to tonight. A night that will prove to have great value.

#writing #creative writing #first time writer #writing prompt #original fiction #original character #historical fiction #writing project #fiction #immortal character #mortal vs immortal #memory loss

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serpent-of-the-silver-plumes · 3 years

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would you mind talking more about bart and unreliable narration? I always hear people say unreliable narration but I've never seen any concrete examples from media I actually consume so I'd love your thoughts

Oh absolutely!! I actually wrote a thing about this a while back but then went 'this is not well written' and it got buried in my drafts, so I’m glad to have an excuse to pull that up and rewrite it. (Also sorry, this got really long.)

Basically, at one point I was listening to a podcast (Be the Serpent, ep 4), and they categorize different kinds of unreliable narrators into three types: the narrator who knows they are lying to you, the narrator who is lying to themself (and therefore you), and the narrator who is lying because they are missing some key information. I would argue that the three main pov characters of the Bartimaeus Trilogy each represent a different type of these unreliable narrators.

Going in backwards order, Kitty is the narrator who lies because she is missing some key information, at least until the third book. As a commoner, even one who is part of a resistance movement, her knowledge of magic is extremely limited and biased. Were we to go off of her point of view alone, we would get an inaccurate view of this world and the power dynamics that exist within it: that magicians are somehow special in holding magic and that they have evil demons who work alongside them in shared mischief/hunger for power/whatever.

However, because the books include other points of view, the full impact of that unreliability is not realized.

Similarly, Nathaniel lies to himself, especially in the later books. He ignores how much he personally contributes to upholding a system that depends on the oppression and slavery of other sentient beings, and squashes down the last traces of his moral compass. I don’t think he ever really questions the system of government or if it should be there and work the way it does.

To some extent, we do see through his unreliability as well, because Bartimaeus is around to keep a check on him and tell the reader that no, the magicians and their imperialism are bad, that spirits have very good reason to hate humans, and give us other world building details that contradict what Nathaniel believes.

But some of it is about what is going on inside Nathaniel’s own head, so there is also a lot that can’t be fully seen by an outside perspective that has to be assumed by the reader. Like he will deny the sentimental feelings he has towards Ms. Underwood and the guilt he had over Kitty’s supposed death and the fact that he even remotely cares about Bartimaeus, but actions speak louder than words.

Because both of these characters’ unreliability stem from a lack of understanding, having other perspectives in the book in some ways cancels out their unreliability, and actually ties their unreliability more to their character development than as a plot/narration device. Kitty grows more reliable throughout the series while Nathaniel gets less so until the end. This doesn’t make that unreliability useless though, especially in a series aimed for children. By getting each character’s point of view, we can see where they are coming from and how the knowledge and views they have affect the way they act, but there is also someone else to point out how they are wrong, to make you question how true what each individual says is.

Bartimaeus is entirely different from the first two characters. His narration is told in first person, unlike Nathaniel and Kitty’s third person. He talks directly to the reader and goes off on tangential footnotes that are not necessarily part of the events currently happening in the story. Because of this narration style, he also has the power to lie more directly to the reader than any of the other characters.

Given his life, it is understandable how he has gotten into the habit of lying. Every moment of his existence on Earth is spent under the power of someone else, so he lies in order to protect himself. There are some instances where he lies to his masters in order to escape punishment or to lead them into danger so he can be set free, but he also lies about his feelings because he cannot afford to be emotionally vulnerable.

For the most part, I think it can be assumed that the dialogue and most actions that happen in his pov chapters are told as they are, since much of that lines up with what goes on in the other characters’ perspectives, and also there are at least a few things that show him in a less-than-flattering light that he would probably leave out or change if he could. Instead, the lies he tells are largely about his past and his emotions, often done through exaggeration or omission, and cannot be collaborated by others.

When lying about his past, Bartimaeus frequently exaggerates his prestige and role in history. In Ptolemy’s Gate, Bartimaeus says that he talked to King Solomon about Faquarl’s tendency to brag about his historical importance. Even beyond the obvious irony, in the prequel we see Bartimaeus’s time at Solomon’s court, and while it isn’t technically impossible for him to have talked to Solomon about Faquarl, the timing and circumstances make it extremely unlikely. Although his other stories cannot be proven or disproven with what we know, this instance and his general tendency to brag outrageously makes it very likely that Bartimaeus at the very least embellishes.

However, despite being super showy about his past, Bartimaeus doesn’t actually include much important information. He very rarely talks about his great feats as a thief or assassin or anything else. When he lists his accomplishments, he describes building walls and talking to important historical figures. There’s a post somewhere (if I find it, I’ll link it) that explains this as being a way for Bartimaeus to try to take control of his reputation and therefore his life; by associating with safer jobs, he is less likely to be summoned for very dangerous and morally reprehensible jobs.

He does generally try to portray himself as clever and collected and just generally more cool than he actually is. There’s a moment at the end of the first book where he describes himself as trying to calm Nathaniel who is freaking out, and then the next chapter is from Nathaniel’s pov which describes him as being the calmer one while Bartimaeus is a fly anxiously buzzing around.

I don’t remember the exact line, but in the second book there’s an exchange that goes something like this:

“____” I said calmly.

“Stop your whimpering,” Kitty said.

The way Bartimaeus portrays himself is straight up contradicted by the more factual account of the words and actions of someone else. And presumably there are plenty of other times that we do not see contradictory evidence where Bartimaeus straight up lies about how he is reacting to something.

But one of Bartimaeus’s most unreliable points centers around humans. Throughout the books, he constantly talks about the ways he has killed and would like to kill his masters, if given the opportunity. Nathaniel is an exception, one that Bartimaeus does admit to the reader, but even in the third book when he talks the most about how he would kill Nathaniel or even join a demon rebellion if Faquarl offered right then and there, Bartimaeus does not actually follow through on these threats when he gets the chance. Despite all of his talk about how much he hates humans, Bartimaeus has as much of a positive relationship he can have with as many humans possible, given the circumstances.

A lot of his unreliability centers around Ptolemy, which is what some of Bartimaeus’s biggest lies of omission are about. In the first book, we do get the sense that Bartimaeus has a soft spot for at least some humans. His excuses of saving and looking after Nathaniel in order to avoid Indefinite Confinement, while likely not entirely false, do fall a bit flat. We even get a mention of “a boy I had known once before, someone I had loved.” Although this is not explicitly connected to Ptolemy at this point, mentions of brown skin and the Nile make a pretty obvious connection to Ptolemy, especially as Bartimaeus describes taking on Ptolemy’s form several times later on. There is a less obvious hint too, “I sat on the ground, cross-legged, the way Ptolemy used to do.” Even without knowing much about what kind of relationship Bartimaeus had with Ptolemy, that kind of detail shows ‘a devotion to detail that could only come with genuine affection, or perhaps even love.’

It isn’t until the third book until we learn anything substantial about his relationship with Ptolemy, and even then he doesn’t tell the whole story. The fandom jokes about how Bartimaeus just casually mentions in a foot note that he prefers a lioness form because the manes are annoying, and it’s not until the flashback that you find out that the mane is part of what got Ptolemy killed. And even with the flashbacks, you still never see the time that Ptolemy visited the Other Place.

There are a lot of posts on this site that talk about how Bartimaeus absolutely was idealizing Ptolemy, and how there’s some evidence that he isn’t the perfectly sweet never-did-anything-wrong innocent child that Bartimaeus describes him as (notably that part where he was vaguely annoyed that people kept coming to him to ask for help and interrupted his research). Not that Ptolemy secretly sucks or anything, but it’s really easy to let nostalgia skip over the less dramatic details of Ptolemy being an actual human being with flaws.

In summary, I would argue that all of the trilogy protagonists are unreliable narrators to varying extents, and Jonathan Stroud is a genius for how he manages to make it all work.

#bartimaeus #nathaniel #ptolemy #kitty jones #my post #kitty #unreliable narrator

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plannedparenthood · 4 years

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Thank You, RBG

We are heartbroken. Supreme Court Justice and gender equality hero Ruth Bader Ginsburg died on Friday, Sept. 18. Her death is a painful loss for our country. She was a fierce and unapologetic warrior for equality, and her achievements are endless. As we mourn we’re also embracing our gratitude for her service to our country.

Cherishing RBG’s Legacy

Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg committed her life to protecting the rights, freedoms, and health of people across the country — in particular women, communities of color, and others whose voices too often go unheard. She was a true trailblazer who inspired millions of girls and women to fight through sexism and discrimination to make American a better place to work, to live, and to love.

Her powerful words over the years, including her razor-sharp dissents, helped push our nation toward freedom and opportunity for all. Her spirit, values, and words will be deeply missed.

A Modern Revolutionary

Some revolutionaries shook up a society with anger burning and guns blazing. Others studied hard, knocked down an unfair system one peg at a time, and spoke truth to power while wearing a lace collar. That was Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

She got two mottoes from her mother, Celia Bader (who marched for women’s suffrage):

“Be independent,” take care of yourself without being financially beholden to a man, and

“Be a lady,” don't allow emotions like anger to be so consuming they get in your way.

When Ruth Bader Ginsburg saw anything repugnant — like systemic discrimination — she would get straight to work. It wasn’t easy. Over decades, Ruth Bader Ginsburg faced a slew of indignities. But she harnessed courage and resolve to strategically break down America’s sexist, unethical laws and institutions.

To honor the Notorious RBG, we’ve collected our seven favorite facts about her life and her legacy.

7) RBG was defiant in the face of entrenched sexism in college and law school.

Most colleges didn’t accept women in the 1950s, and Ruth Bader was one of the first to break the gender barrier. At Cornell University, she was sexually harassed by a professor, who offered answers to a test in exchange for sex. She confronted him: “I went to his office and I said, ‘How dare you? How dare you do this?’ And that was the end of that.”

At Harvard Law School, she and the eight other women in her class of more than 500 students were ogled, ignored in the classroom, excluded from the library, and asked by the dean how they could possibly justify taking a seat away from a man. But that hostile environment didn’t stop her.

She fought it with brain power and superhuman physical endurance. She was so obsessed with the law that she’d regularly stay up until dawn studying. Well into her 80s, she retained her reputation for working until 3 a.m. and living on just two hours of sleep.

While she was kicking butt at the top of her classes, she was also taking care of her young daughter and sick husband. Martin (Marty) Ginsburg contracted testicular cancer and had extensive radiation therapy, which kept him from going to his own law school classes. So, RBG organized his friends to attend his classes, worked through their notes with Marty, and typed up Marty’s papers — all while doing her own schoolwork on top of it.

She tied for first in her class from Columbia Law School in 1959. She also was the first person to become a member of both the prestigious Harvard Law Review, and the Columbia Law Review — one of many of her unprecedented feats. She proved to those elite schools that a woman could succeed.

6) RBG showed the world what a partnership looks like in a husband-wife relationship.

Ruth Bader met Marty Ginsburg while they were both at Cornell University, and they forged an equal partnership from the beginning. He learned to cook so she didn’t have to. Later, he lobbied for her seats on the Court of Appeals in D.C. and on the Supreme Court. And he gave up his law firm in New York to follow her to Washington — a shocking move at the time.

Here’s how she put it at her 1993 Senate confirmation hearing:

“I surely would not be in this room today without the determined efforts of men and women who kept dreams of equal citizenship alive. I have had the great good fortune to share life with a partner truly extraordinary for his generation. A man who believed at age 18 when we met that a woman’s work, whether at home or on the job, is as important as a man’s. I became a lawyer when women were not wanted by most members of the legal profession. I became a lawyer because Marty supported that choice unreservedly.”

5.) RBG won a whopping five cases before the Supreme Court — and they all advanced the Constitutional protection of equal rights for all Americans.

As smart and accomplished as Ruth Bader Ginsburg was, no law firm would hire her after she graduated from law school. Law firms slammed the door in her face time after time because they only hired men. She realized that “being a woman was an impediment.”

As Ginsburg navigated the legal working world in the 1960s, she saw how thousands of state and federal laws were treating women as second-class citizens. At that time, most states’ laws allowed employment termination for pregnancy, and let banks deny credit to women without a male co-signer. The Supreme Court had rejected every challenge to laws that treated women worse than men.

All this gender discrimination fueled Ginsburg’s drive for social justice. In the early 1970s, she followed the strategy of NAACP civil rights lawyer and Supreme Court Justice Thurgood Marshall, who helped dismantle Jim Crow laws case by case over many years — leading to Brown v. Board of Education of Topeka, which outlawed racial segregation in schools in 1954. Like Marshall, Ginsburg centered her arguments on the 14th Amendment to the Constitution, which says all persons should be treated equally under the law.

Throughout the ‘70s, Ginsburg led the ACLU’s Women's Rights Project, for which she argued and won five landmark gender equality cases before the Supreme Court. As she said in the 2018 documentary RBG: "I knew that I was speaking to men who didn't think there was such a thing as gender-based discrimination, and my job was to tell them it really exists.”

These cases set the foundation for the country’s laws against sex discrimination, and helped eliminate being male as the criteria for employment, pay, and benefits:

Two cases in 1975 and 1979 established the requirement that women serve on juries, recognizing that they should enjoy both the benefits and the responsibilities of our judicial system.

“The vaunted woman's privilege viewed against history's backdrop simply reflects and perpetuates a certain way of thinking about women. Women traditionally were deemed lesser citizens.”

—Ruth Bader Ginsburg, arguing before the Supreme Court (Duren v. Missouri, 1979)

An employment benefits case in 1973 required the U.S. military to equally distribute family-based benefits for service members regardless of sex.

“In asking the Court to declare sex a suspect criterion, we urge a position forcibly stated in 1837 by Sara Grimke, noted abolitionist and advocate of equal rights for men and women. She said, ‘I ask no favor for my sex. All I ask of our brethren is that they take their feet off our necks.'”

— Ruth Bader Ginsburg, arguing before the Supreme Court (Frontiero v. Richardson, 1973)

Two cases in 1974 and 1975 threw out gender-based distinctions in survivors’ benefits, granting widowers the same benefits as widows. RBG argued that while giving widows special treatment sounded nice, it wasn’t. Withholding benefits to widowers devalued the work of their deceased wives.

“A gender line...helps to keep women not on a pedestal, but in a cage.”

—Ruth Bader Ginsburg, arguing before the Supreme Court (Weinberger v. Wiesenfeld, 1975)

4) At her confirmation hearings, RBG openly declared that abortion access is a Constitutional right.

At her 1993 Supreme Court confirmation hearings, Ruth Bader Ginsburg showed what it looks like to uphold constitutional rights. Unlike recent Supreme Court nominees, she affirmatively declared the Constitutional right to safe, legal abortion. When Sen. Hank Brown (R-CO) grilled her about her views on abortion, she declared:

“But you asked me about my thinking about equal protection versus individual autonomy, and my answer to you is it's both. This is something central to a woman's life, to her dignity. It's a decision that she must make for herself. And when Government controls that decision for her, she's being treated as less than a fully adult human responsible for her own choices.”

3) RBG wrote the historic decision ruling that state-funded schools must admit women.

In 1996, Justice Ginsburg wrote the Supreme Court’s majority opinion in United States v. Virginia, which ruled that the Virginia Military Institute’s men-only admission policy violated the 14th Amendment’s equal protection clause. Justice Ginsburg destroyed the Institute’s argument that its program wasn’t suitable for women. Instead, she wrote that:

“[G]eneralizations about ‘the way women are,’ estimates of what is appropriate for most women, no longer justify denying opportunity to women whose talent and capacity place them outside the average description.”

The school has admitted women since then, and — as Justice Ginsburg predicted — they have made the school proud.

2) RBG’s dissent from the majority in Lilly Ledbetter’s case led to the passage a fair pay law.

In 2007, Justice Ginsburg dissented in the ruling against Lilly Ledbetter — a tire factory employee who learned, decades into her tenure, that she was being paid much less than men in the exact same supervisory role: She was making $3,727 per month, while her male counterparts were making between $4,286 and $5,236 per month. However, she lost the case because the Civil Rights Act had a statute of limitations for reporting on discrimination.

In her scathing dissent, Justice Ginsburg wrote that gender discrimination can be hidden for a long time and “the ball is in Congress’s court” to change the rule. In 2009, Barack Obama signed the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act, which extended the Civil Rights Act’s statute of limitations and guarantees women equal pay for equal work.

1.) RBG put the smack down on TRAP laws in Whole Woman’s Health v. Hellerstedt.

In the landmark Whole Woman’s Health v. Hellerstedt case in 2016, the Supreme Court — including Justice Ginsburg — ruled that two abortion restrictions in Texas were unconstitutional because they would shut down most clinics in the state and cause Texans an “undue burden” on access to safe, legal abortion. The case exposed the lie that anti-abortion politicians have been peddling for years: that it’s somehow “safer” when the state imposes medically unnecessary, onerous targeted restrictions against abortion providers (TRAP) laws.

In her concurring opinion to the majority, Justice Ginsburg wrote:

“Given those realities [that keep abortion access out of reach], it is beyond rational belief that H.B. 2 could genuinely protect the health of women, and certain that the law ‘would simply make it more difficult for them to obtain abortions’... When a State severely limits access to safe and legal procedures, women in desperate circumstances may resort to unlicensed rogue practitioners... at great risk to their health and safety.”

With this historic decision, the Court reaffirmed the constitutional right to access legal abortion. This decision was a triumph for abortion access. And when one of the restrictions that Ginsburg helped strike down came up in another lawsuit this year, Ginsburg again helped lead the Court to protecting abortion access in a major Supreme Court victory for reproductive rights.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg rose for all of us. How will we work together to rise for her?

From day one, Justice Ginsburg recognized our constitutional right to control our bodies and our destinies. That is a legacy that cannot and must not depart with her.

Justice Ginsburg stood up for us. Now it’s our turn.

Follow Planned Parenthood at facebook.com/PlannedParenthood and twitter.com/PPFA to stay updated on how to get involved. Together, we will rise.

By Miriam at PPFA

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rorodawnchorus · 3 years

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The Chinese journalist who’s been writing about Uyghur people

"Uyghurs are working in factories that are in the supply chains of at least 82 well-known global brands in the technology, clothing and automotive sectors, including Apple, BMW, Gap, Huawei, Nike, Samsung, Sony and Volkswagen.” - Uyghurs For Sale

Vicky Xu was born and raised in China. She thought the Tiananmen Square massacre was fake and she used to be very nationalistic, often standing up for the CCP. Now, she has been writing about the oppression and cultural genocide Uyghur people have been experiencing for years. In this tweet, she talks about her experience and why she was driven to do investigative journalism on human rights abuses in China, particularly Xinjiang.

https://mobile.twitter.com/xu_xiuzhong/status/1377527819715010561

(I won’t be translating her thread word for word but I’ll translate some quotes and also the gist of the thread)

She says she’s questioned herself about taking huge risks and writing about Xinjiang and Uyghur people. She’s wondered if it was all “worth it”. She says “no matter how difficult it is, I must report about all that has befallen on Uyghur people. The root of the oppression on Uyghur people stems from the governing authority which is held by the majority Han Chinese government and this is the destruction of Uyghur people and culture.” Using the excuse of anti-terrorism policies, Uyghur people who are just average citizens with no intention to overthrow the government, they’re being put into concentration camps that are called “re-education camps” by the CCP. “As an ethnic majority Han Chinese” she says, “I cannot sit by idly and remain silent.”

In 2017, when she was writing for New York Times, she was told that articles written in English would more likely fly under the radar of the CCP so she decided to do that. However, her articles had been translated and she has been cyberbullied, her family and friends have been harassed in China, and deepfake sex tapes/nudes have been spread online with claims that it is her.

When she graduated in 2018, she joined Australian Broadcasting Company. However, due to lack of funds, she was only able to interview Uyghur people who have moved to Australia (there is a community in Adelaide, as per her tweet). At first, she noted, they were reluctant to open up to her and share more with her. She says, “At that time, all I could do was to write and tell the truth. Even if no one cares about it now or what the truth is, at least I’m leaving a historical record.” She would listen to her interviewees in tears, talking about their captured relatives in Xinjiang. Then she would return to her office and draft an email asking for China’s formal response on these claims; she would always watch as her hand tremble, hesitant about sending the email.

In 2019, she wrote a piece for the NY Times which had enough international attention which put pressure on the CCP to release the relatives of the two families in that article. Ever since then, her family and friends in China began receiving threats and were harassed. Her Uyghur friends said to her at the time: “You’ve become like us.”

Later, she joined the Australian Strategic Policy Institute and was the lead author for a research publication, Uyghur For Sale. In that report, it was mentioned that “Uyghurs are working in factories that are in the supply chains of at least 82 well-known global brands in the technology, clothing and automotive sectors, including Apple, BMW, Gap, Huawei, Nike, Samsung, Sony and Volkswagen.”

“This report” she says in her tweet, “illustrates the undeniable relation between every other person to the human rights abuses against Uyghur people: Everyone could possibly be wearing a product that was manufactured through forced labour. This research report was passed on within the journalism industry and the influence it has far exceeds the expectations which my colleagues and I initially had. I haven’t purchased any new clothes or mobile phone this year for I know that once I step into the mall, I would see all the brands involved which I have written about and I would feel guilty (about buying any one of them).”

She says the State Security has been detaining, interrogating and harassing people in Mainland China who are close to her. They’ve also attempted to paint her in a bad light by “exposing” her sexual affairs, etc.

Recently, she has been accused for being the mastermind behind the “fake news” of Xinjiang Cotton. She clarifies that she’s never written about “Xinjiang Cotton” specifically but have only been reporting on supply chains involving forced labour. She also emphasised that in the past years, countless journalists and scholars have been writing about these human rights abuses. This was how so many countries were able to arrive at a conclusion regarding the allegations of human rights abuses, thus making policy decisions to stop import or penalise any companies involved.

She says “China is using “Xinjiang Cotton” to confuse the public (divert attention). The fact is that many companies, whether they are fashion houses, electronics companies or medical equipment manufacturers, or even food product manufacturers, they have all had some kind of relation to the Uyghur forced labour (through supply chains). This problem runs deeper than “Xinjiang cotton”*. The Chinese government is attempting to equate the forced labour issue in Xinjiang with the China-US trade war, completely ignoring the fact that Australian, American, European, Japanese and even some Chinese consumers are concerned about purchasing products that were manufactured through force labour.”

“At first, I chose to become a journalist because I didn’t have the courage to become an activist. While working in the newsroom, I was less outspoken and seldom expressed my personal views. Now, I see myself being labelled “a devilish woman”, “Han traitor (a traitor to China)”; I feel helpless but amused at the same time. I started from “secretly writing in English to leave some historical record” to becoming the target of State machinations, painting me as the female monster causing disaster to befall on countless Chinese people.”

“If I previously held onto the faint thought of remaining silent to save my own skin, I have become purged of all these thoughts after going through the cyberbullying. All I can do is to continue writing; I shall write to the day these “re-education camps” are closed down; I shall write until I see the day forced labour is put to an end; I shall write to the end of the earth. Personally, I must carry on doing what is right. The price which I must pay will all be worthy for the troubles I have caused to the people around me, I will repay them myself.”

***

Note: The CCP and their 50 cent army/Little Pink movement online constantly tries to place the focus on Xinjiang cotton, pulling out a photo of enslaved Black people during a press statement, saying “Look! The US did this. We, on the other hand, use highly mechanized harvest operations in Xinjiang.” to claim that there are no human rights abuses taking place there.

She concludes her tweet by saying she has not written in Chinese for some time and the CCP machinations has forced her to use a “translation tone Chinese” in her writing as response to the cyberbullying from C-netz. So this is basically a translation of a Twitter thread written like a translation O_O

I would like to add, though, the way I see the CCP works is that they like to use nationalism and patriotism to inflame C-netz and cause them to “take things into their own hands”. They caused this “national boycott” of Western fashion houses within Mainland China using nationalistic sentiments and “a sign of loyalty”; to act in any other way online or in public could bring about verbal attacks. Some Chinese staff of Adidas or other stores in China are being cyberbullied as well. Some Taiwanese consumers have expressed that they feel less guilty about shopping at fashion houses like H&M since they took this stance but I wonder how many people around the world actually cared enough to take on the personal initiative to consciously choose what they are purchasing? Obviously, a Twitter thread can’t go into the complex psychological workings of all that’s going on.

(Hopefully this adds to the voice for Uyghur people as well. Do not be confused by the whole “Western imperialism against China” talk. It does not erase or reduce the fact that there are human rights abuses happening.)

#Uyghur #Uyghur people #Xinjiang #Xinjiang cotton #Journalist #Vicky Xu #China #human rights #CCP

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lailoken · 3 years

Text

“The Embodied Lives of Elves

Our pre-modern ancestors seem to have had room in their collective imaginal life for humans walking among them who were deemed ontologically different in some way-enough to considered faeries or nightmares (mara or mora). This is not to say of course, that such people were physically inhuman, (though it's debatable whether Witches or werewolves were considered human by persecutors of the Craft in the past) but that they were believed to carry a mysterious taint of otherness.

Modern writers on faeries, even gifted ones like the Frouds tend to position faeries as existing in the imaginative, or perhaps "imaginal" dimension of the human psyche. To our forebears the Otherworld was a far more embodied place and testimonials given by people who saw and interacted with faerie beings in the past stress that they possessed a kind of substance, though less substantial than our own forms. How else could folk beliefs about faerie marriages have begun?

In pre-modern Europe humans possessed a shadow in which they’d walk at night, sometimes it appeared as an animal, sometimes as a human double or a partly human form. There was no such thing as something that was no “body,” which is one of the reasons the mainstream insistence on a strong body-spirit dichotomy sits awkwardly with the spirit of some Old Craft traditions.

Consequently, if we are to understand Faerie from the perspective of the folk genius then we will need to soften the edges of this body-spirit binary and try to imaginatively descend into an older way of seeing. If we can achieve this we will find ourselves immersed in an way exuberantly sensuous way of being, and rediscover our senses anew as portals to the Otherworld. What begins as a historical curiosity becomes a stretching of our own imaginative faculties and eventually yields to mystical ecstasies.

Anthropologists and historians often take a patronizing view of the idea of spirits leading embodied lives much like our own. The general explanation being that people in the past were literally unable to imagine anything much different to their own way of life. Or, that being unable to visualise something made of nothing they dressed their airy imaginings in a kind of subtle form or body.

The other option presented to us as practitioners is to simply have the humility to take the folk at their word and accept that these observations of the lives of faeries, made over countless generations, might reflect real experiences of another world. We do not need to intellectually commit to that perspective if it is too uncomfortable, but let us explore it with openness. Let us allow for a moment that the conglomerated wisdom of generations, the collective imaginal experience of an entire people or peoples, may in fact know better than we do.

Yorkshire biographer Durant Hotham described the faerie body in the following way. He said they were "lodged in Vehicles of a thinner-spun thread than is (otherwise than by condensation) visible to our dim sight.”

So whilst they are made of something thinner spun they are certainly made of something other than just the substance of our imagiation. This notion of bodies made of a lighter stuff was agreed on by Robert Kirk earlier who said faeries possessed: "light changeable bodies like those called astral somewhat of the nature of condes'd cloud."

So far we find images of finely-spun thread and clouds or mist being used to describe the faerie form. Both of these images are taken from the widespread faerie mythos we have traced across Europe, as faeries are intimately associated with spinning and appearing out of mists or as condensed clouds. The suggestion here is that they are able to condense or expand their form, weaving it in tightly or loosely invisible to humans. What their bodies are woven from is only so as to be perceived or otherwise ever hinted at, but vapor and mist seem to be strong candidates, which would suggest there is some degree of air-born moisture in their form.

Somerset surgeon John Beaumont touched a fairy's hand in a chillingly tactile encounter, he describes how it: "yielded to my touch, that I could not find any sensible resistancy in it.” Though it did not resist him this does not sound like something that felt like simple air, the words “yielded to his touch" suggests something fragile but nonetheless of substance. Another testimony confirms this description:

"I have often seen that way while in my bed. Many women are among them. I once touched a boy of their's, and he was just like feathers in my hand; there was no substance in him, and I knew he wasn't a living being."

In his poem ‘The Witch of Fife,’ written in the early Romantic era, Thomas Hogg describes the elf man's form as "having no blood in him and pale like cauliflower." He also describes faeries and Witches both travelling some distance to attend Sabbats in other lands. This is significant because Hogg's father is rumored to have been the last man in his area to possess the faerie sight. So any knowledge about the faeries that found its way into Hogg's work would likely have been influenced by the input of a genuine Scottish faerie seer of the eighteenth century.

One of the best ways to pursue a deeper understanding of how the faerie body works is to study occurrences where faeries have appeared as corpse candles or faerie lights, only to condense before the viewers' eyes into a humanoid form. Here are some examples of such sightings. Let us use them to compare faeries manifesting out of pure light with the so-called corpse candle observed to leave the body of humans when in sleep or near death.

"At first it seemed no more than a light in some house; but as we came nearer to it and it was passing out of our direct line of vision we saw that it was moving up and down, to and fro, diminishing to a spark, then expanding into a yellow luminous flame. Before we came to Listowel we noticed two lights, about one hundred yards to our right... Suddenly each of these lights expanded into the same sort of yellow luminous flame, about six feet high by four feet broad. In the midst of each flame we saw a radiant being having human form. Presently the lights moved towards one another and made contact whereupon the two beings in them were seen to be walking side by side. The beings' bodies were formed of a pure dazzling radiance, white like the radiance of the sun, and much brighter than the yellow that surrounded them."

Now of course humans have a corpse candle that can leave the body a as Elias Owen describes in his ‘Welsh Folklore: A Collection of the Folk-tales and Legends of North Wales’:

“It was believed that it was possible for the spirit to leave the body. and then, after an absence of some time, to return again and re-enter it. The form the spirit assumed when it quitted the body was a bluish light like that of a candle, but somewhat longer. This light left the body through the mouth, and re-entered the same way. The writer was informed by a certain female friend at Llandegla that she had seen a bluish light leave the mouth of a person who was sick, light which she thought was the life, or spirit of that person, but the person did not immediately die."

How do faerie lights differ from the corpse candles that emerge from human beings? Well it seems like the phenomenon is the same but in reverse. Faeries can body forth a human-looking form by condensing a very fine mist-like body until it becomes a bright spark of light, whereas humans belong in a dense body that nonetheless conceals a body of light.

Romani lore compiled by Patrick Jasper Lee suggests that the faerie body is ethereal but very real and that it can become denser through the consumption of life force. The ghostly dead and ethereal fay both shared one great trick, they could become tsochano, or vampires, and drink the blood of the living and in this way gain an "ectoplasmic body." Over time they might be mistaken for a living person.

The status of the body may often be an ontological difference, rather than one of solidity. A study of faerie lore overturns numerous insistences of abduction, which would look like simple death to one outside the Faerie Faith. But for those with the eyes to see the corpse was interpreted as a stock, a fake, a of wood glamoured into taking the appearance of the dead while the fae made off with their real body.

So whilst we may have trouble believing in a faerie creature becoming more tangible through consuming life force, or of humans be-ing bodily taken away, the lore is so copious that we should retain an open mind around the topic of exactly what "body" and "real" meant when our ancestors used them. What is clear is that faeries were firmly believed and experienced by many people as existing in some tangible way that was not merely within the world of shared imagination but was sensual and actual.

Here we press up, almost uncomfortably close, to the knowledge of our foreparents' quite literal belief in the physical existence of faeries. Because this journey into the folk imaginal realm of the past is about leaning into discomfort rather than fleeing from it, let us look closely at a faerie narrative that falls somewhere in the uneasy middle place between mythic story and recent folk legend.”

—

Sounds of Infinity

by Lee Morgan

#sounds of infinity #Lee Morgan #faeries #faerie folk #fair folk #fair family #fae folk #faerie #faerie faith

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hamliet · 3 years

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when does a relationship become queerbaiting? theres a book that i really like and the 2 male leads characters have a lot of storylines and arcs where they get closer and i think some of the tropes used can be similar to the typical romantic tropes, neither of them end up with anyone at the end of the story since its more about found family and the long journey the whole cast goes through. they even get shipped by another character as a running gag. personally i always saw it as being open to interpretation but recently the revised edition of the original novel came out and there were several lines those 2 characters had about each other that were kinda toned down, i didnt think much of it but i saw a post about how it was clearly baiting and the author was being homophobic for toning it down. i didnt think it counted as baiting since as far as i know, the novel was never advertised as anything with romance and the author never pretended they were gonna end up together. i am definitely a little weirded out by the decision to change those specific lines but a lot of the story stayed the same, including a lot about their relationship so idk what to think.

i guess im more confused on if it counts as baiting, or even substext??

Sooooo I am not the best person to ask about this, because I’m a cis woman who has thus far in life only been attracted in a romantic sense to cis men. I can talk a bit about baiting as a general concept in fiction, but you should definitely take it with some grains of salt.

Baiting, for me, is like deliberately playing up an aspect writers have no intention on delivering on. Usually this is done for ratings, to tease fans, fanservice, etc, but without payoff, it is just bad writing. Red herrings are good in writing, but only can be successfully used if the actual result is more satisfying than the herring. This applies to writing in general, not just to romantic ships. However, when the baiting involves historically underrepresented groups for no reason other than to get fans to spend money consuming the story, I think we can all agree that becomes something more grotesque than just bad writing: it’s insensitive, socially irresponsible, frankly hurtful.

Some common examples are Bridgerton which has a gay character, who is extremely minor, yet they played up this character in advertising. Also, Rizzoli and Isles I think actually had its producers mention deliberately playing up the lesbian subtext to hook the audience without ever intending on following through.

That said, context also matters. Like, there are aspects of the culture of the work’s author, the target audience, and such that come into play here also (so like, romantic tropes differ by culture. For example, enemies to lovers is common in Asian stories but less in the west, and the “girl who pursues a guy” is extremely common in Japanese shonen in particular, while it is very much a cringe trope that almost never results in romance in American fiction. So if a writer reads, say, tropes that are common in America into a Japanese work and says it’s baiting, that’s quite possibly not the intent even if it may have been the experience of the reader. So even if there was no intent, there can still be hurt, and that hurt can be real, if that makes sense.

The definition of what constitutes ‘baiting’ varies. I do think that, in true Tumblr fashion, the term gets thrown around a lot and loses its intended meaning, or is so rigidly defined that creators can meet the letter of the “not a bait” requirement while ignoring the spirit of it.

To start with the latter: regarding something hitting the letter of what most wouldn’t consider baiting yet not really the spirit, let’s look at The Rise of Skywalker. This movie had a genuine lesbian kiss in it... between two characters we’d never seen more than a glimpse of while others are celebrating around them. Since it has a kiss, it’s not baiting, right? Well... the director deliberately said in the lead-up to the film that he included it because he “wanted LGBT people to see themselves in the film.” If “see yourselves in the film” is like a nanosecond of background, then, like... idk. Baiting or not, it feels icky, and I know some people consider it baiting and some don’t even if they don’t like, love that representation. But I think this is more queerbaiting than like, Nobara and Maki, who don’t have explicit romantic coding.

Going back to the former, in terms of ‘queerbaiting’ losing its intended meaning... I think there are a lot of really poorly written romantic ships out there, often het, while a lot of same-gender relationships are really well written regardless of whether there’s romantic coding within the text. The main emotional energy in stories with 90% male characters (as frankly many if not most stories are, great job world) is probably between two men. There’s just so much more potential with well-written characters who share a lot of screen time, so of course people are going to ship them. In my opinion, this does not inherently make it baiting, but it certainly creates an environment that lends itself to baiting even if the writers aren’t intending to do this.

Like, you could say the main emotional energy in BNHA is Bakugou and Deku. However, Bakudeku is 100% not queerbaiting. It’ll never be canon romantically (I don’t even ship it lol). There has been nothing to imply romance between them even if the main emotional message can be seen in their development. Deku/Ochaco is likely to be canon, but there is a significant lack of genuine emotional energy between them (the story’s plots and themes don’t coalesce around their relationship), so it’s probably going to feel forced. In contrast, Naruto/Sasuke had an actual kiss in canon, which while played for laughs is a lot more direct romantic coding than anything between Bakugou/Deku. I actually don’t think the majority of Narusasu is baiting, but I definitely think that one moment in chapter like 3 was really poor fanservice for yaoi fans, and has not aged well at all.

It is also the case that fans can confuse headcanons with what is actually in the text, and that just never ends well. For example, Clover and Qrow’s ship in RWBY: a lot of people read Clover as gay, which led to “bury your gays” outrage when he died. A member of the crew stated explicitly they had never intended for Clover to be a love interest for Qrow, and truthfully here was nothing strictly romantic in their relationship--nothing like a kiss or a declaration of love or a parallel to another romantic couple. Hence, I don’t personally consider it queerbaiting or bury your gays, but a lot of fans felt that it was and their pain is legitimate even if I think textually the argument isn’t there. The one thing I do think is true about this in particular is that there was also no strict platonic coding, which encourages headcanons. Clear writing, yo. It can help.

Note the word “can” not “will,” because strict platonic coding doesn’t always fix things, either. In what was probably a reaction to the outrage over Clover’s death, you had extremely blatant platonic coding of Ruby and Penny’s relationship this season leading up to Penny’s death. Ruby refers to Penny as “our friend” three different times, wherein “friend” sends a platonic message and “our” sends an even stronger message that it’s not about the two of them despite the fact that their friendship is one of the sweetest and most interesting in the show. A lingering Ruby-Penny hug then is followed by a lingering Penny-Weiss hug, then Yang, then Blake, etc. The writers went out of their way to hit people over the head with “platonic” and yet they have still gotten accusations of bury your gays and queerbaiting because people will see what they want to see in a story.

Seeing what you want to see in a story also isn’t inherently bad. People who are underrepresented are going to have to read themselves into stories because Lord knows writers ain’t incorporating them well enough if at all. It’s why “Mary Sues” are common in fanfiction, which is primarily written by people who are not straight white men: because where the hell else are we to see ourselves in fiction? So essentially the macrocosm of culture creates this problem, both in terms of baiting and the misuse of the term, and the only fix is a shit ton more good representation.

#ask hamliet #writing stuff #Anonymous

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cheri-translates · 4 years

Text

In Third Person (a translated one-shot)

This one-shot was originally written by 礼里图 on Weibo, who has given me permission to translate it!

“Love possesses not, nor will it be possessed. For love is sufficient unto love.”

[ 1 ]

It had taken great pains to be transferred to the Special Task Force. Your father, with glittering medallions on his chest, was vehemently against you throwing yourself into such a dangerous den. He only authorised the transfer after you threw a fit for several days.

He thought that your stubbornness stemmed from a youthful vigour, and an unwillingness to simply idle away under his protection. But you weren’t that ambitious. While leading an idle life was your ultimate goal, settling down was your life’s ideal.

Well, if it wasn’t for that person.

The person waiting for your arrival is Eli. After reading out the word on his name tag, he shoots you a smile, revealing a set of straight teeth as he exudes an aura of gentility. “Nice to meet you, MC. I’m Eli. Follow me. Captain Gavin is waiting for you.”

You thank him, maintaining an external appearance of calm. Trailing behind him, you murmur in your heart: What kind of a paradise is Loveland City? Why are there so many dashing men?

The Special Task Force isn’t large, and you are soon brought to your destination. Eli opens the door for you, and you see the back of someone standing tall and straight near the window. He turns around at the sound of the door opening, wearing a polite smile on his face.

The afternoon sun encases him. Against the light, you are unable to tell for a moment which one is of a lighter colour - his hair or his eyes.

He gives you a mild smile. “Hello.”

Dizziness consumes you, and it’s as though cotton is lodged in your throat. There are so many things you want to say, but you have no idea where to begin.

He doesn’t remember you. You know that.

“MC.. MC, wake up! Don’t go to sleep! The support team is on its way. Wake up!”

The gunshot wound on your lower abdomen is oozing with blood. You seem to be in someone’s arms. Fading in and out of consciousness, you hear someone calling your name in an unpractised manner. You want to respond, but blood rises up your throat the moment you breathe, leaving him to call out on his own.

In this lifetime, no one has ever called your name so many times before. When the helicopter makes its way to the scene, his relieved and slightly trembling voice propels you to struggle in opening your eyes. But all you see is his defined chin and his name tag coated in blood.

“Gavin?”

“Mm?” The man looks at you, slightly confused.

“Oh, mm... hello.” The profile in your memory and the person in front of you separate from each other. You react with a start, responding incoherently.

Fortunately, the other party doesn’t seem to mind your odd behaviour. He offers you his hand in a polite and business-like manner. “I’m Gavin. We welcome you as a member of the Special Task Force.”

“It’s an honour.”

He shakes your hand. His palm is dry and warm - different from the cold attitude he displays.

“Your Evol is stagnation? You can avoid any physical attacks, and within a set distance, you can indiscriminately freeze your opponent’s Evol.”

You hear a sharp intake of breath coming from Eli behind you. Suppressing the sense of pride in your heart, you look at the wad of documents in his hand, and nod.

“It’s a very unique and powerful Evol.” He places the documents on the table. When his eyes flit to yours this time, you can see that the amicableness in them is more genuine. “We welcome you.”

[ 2 ]

You came here because of Gavin.

During a special police training drill three years ago, the both of you were allocated to be in the same group. At that time, you were arrogant and condescending, looking down on everyone else. During the self-introduction, you didn’t even bother listening to what his name was. Back then, you were certain that given your abilities, you’d be able to get through this drill alone, even though historical data showed that 90% of the special police failed at this stage.

Your confidence wasn’t grounded in nothing. When it came to practice drills, every Evolver was important. So, there typically wouldn’t be any risky weapons like gunpowder. And you were certain that you could get rid of every Evolver within your range.

It couldn’t be helped. In this line of work, talent triumphed over everything else.

But things were unusual during that practice drill. You never expected that people from Black Swan would infiltrate the drill. He didn’t intend to expose himself, but you had once read about his Evol.

Young and overly confident, you wanted to stand out, so you pointed him out immediately. Panicking, he chose to fire a gun. Although Gavin had tried his best to control the wind to alter the bullet’s trajectory, he was too far away, and time was too tight. In the end, you received a bullet to your lower abdomen.

That was the first time you had such a close shave with death. Many nights after that, it was only after recalling the warmth of Gavin’s palm on your wound, and that phrase “wake up”, that you could flee from nightmares.

You had to find him.

[ 3 ]

The life of a civil servant is a boring one.

“Are there any Grade A or Grade S missions today?”

“Nope.”

After asking Eli the same set of daily questions, you sit in the relatively comfortable office.

Special Task Force missions are split into six levels of difficulty - S, A, B, C, D, E. Grade S and A missions are typically led by Gavin, while Grade B and C missions are led by Eli.

Although your Evol is powerful, you’ve only been sent out on trivial missions during your past month in STF. Perhaps it was at your father’s behest, or because you were a newbie. You’ve always been led by Eli, and don’t get to see Gavin much. The first time Gavin saw you lifting up and Evolver with ease, he subconsciously scratched his nose and said: “Truly an overkill.”

You also found that it an overkill. Which is why you’ve been trying to get yourself roped into more difficult missions.

Each time, Eli would give you a look which said that you were being too thick-skinned. “Miss, it’s a peaceful and legal era we live in. We don’t get that many major cases. Also...”

“Also what?”

“Also, it’s not time for you to be deployed.” Eli points at your name tag, then at his own. “You’re blue. I’m green. When you’re green, I’ll help you make an application.”

“Get lost. You’re the one who’s green! You’ll be green soon!”

[Trivia] In Chinese, being “green” means that you’re being cheated on.

“Why are you so agitated?” Eli leans closer. “Why are you so sensitive? Do you have a boyfriend?”

Who says boys aren’t interested in gossip? You roll your eyes at him. “Not for now.”

“That means you do have someone you fancy!” Eli nods contemplatively, a knowing look on his face.

You should have someone you like.

At least, if you don’t have a mistaken definition of what "like” is.

[ 4 ]

It’s a fact that the swivelling chairs in the office are not suitable for working. After using the chair for nearly a month, you get a stiff neck one day when you get up too quickly.

While laughing at your posture, Eli points you towards the infirmary downstairs, and tells you that there’s a kind-looking elderly physician who is experienced in Dit Da.

When you push open the door, you don’t see the physician. instead, you see Gavin, who you haven’t crossed paths with in a long while.

His face is deathly pale as he huddles on one of the sick beds. He looks incredible drained, and is currently asleep. The back of his hand is hooked onto an IV, and the top half of his body is exposed, bandages wrapped around his torso. His back is covered with pinkish bruises and brown scars, both old and new.

The door suddenly opens from behind, bringing with it a gust of fresh air.

“Who are you?”

You adjust your breathing quietly, suppressing the urge to retch. You turn around to see an elderly man in his fifties walking in. He should be the physician Eli mentioned earlier.

“Hey! Why is this man asleep?” Before you can respond, the physician walks over, adjusting the flow of the IV, then tugging the blanket upwards slightly.

“What’s wrong with him?”

“Gavin?” The doctor looks you up and down, his gaze settling on your name tag. “STF Member C-24. Are you this fellow’s subordinate?”

“Mm.” You nod, and repeat your question. “What’s wrong with him?”

“Small issue.” The physician holds up the medical record book at the side, pages rustling as he flips through it. “When does this fellow not bring back a body full of injuries after returning from a mission? Do you see that scar on his collarbone?” He gestures at his own collarbone. “If it were three centimetres deeper, it'd have reached his aorta. Even the gods wouldn’t be able to save him.”

Without waiting for you to express your opinion, the physician continues.

“Why are you young people working so hard? You’re already doing such dangerous work, yet you don’t cherish your bodies. Heading out on missions every day and night. Will the Special Task Force cease to operate without Gavin? He’s still in his twenties, yet he’s so tired that he needs to have an IV... ah, did I wake you up?”

You peer at the bed to find that Gavin has indeed been roused from his sleep. His eye bags display layers of fatigue. In a hoarse voice, he asks, “Why are you here?”

“My... my neck is stiff, so I’m here to have the physician do Dit Da for me.”

“...”

The room lapses into silence. Even without lifting your head, you can sense the physician left aghast at the different severity of injuries between the both of you.

“All right.” The doctor sets down the file in his hand, then walks over to you, placing his hands on your neck. “This is simple. Just twist... and done. Hey, why are you crying?”

The doctor points at your face, stunned. At a loss, he looks at Gavin, as though trying to prove that your tears have nothing to do with him.

You touch your face, and only then discover that your face is damp. Astonished by this involuntary reaction, you use the back of your hands to wipe the wet stains off. But the floodgates have opened, and you just can’t seem to wipe your face clean. In the end, you decide to lower your face, burying it in your palms.

The tightening sensation in your heart grips you in waves. You have no idea where this sorrow stems from. Or maybe you do. Maybe you have known since a long time ago.

But you don’t dare to admit it, and especially not in front of this person - that your uncontrollably trembling shoulders have left you feeling ashamed. In countless nights after this, you’ll definitely toss and turn in bed, regretting this moment.

You don’t want him to be curious about why you’re crying. You’re afraid that his curiosity would lead to him uncovering a secret you wish to tell him, but have no idea how to broach.

“Eh... Miss, why are you crying? Did I hurt you earlier?” The doctor sees that you’re crying even harder now, and starts scrambling around for tissues. “I don’t remember exerting that much strength. Ahh, stop crying! I’ll give you some safflower oil?”

“I’m fine...” You summon your entire body’s worth of strength to bring your sobbing to a halt. Doing your best to control your sniffling, your eyes are hazy as you look at Gavin. You ask hoarsely, “Next time, could I go on missions with you?”

Gavin’s gaze lingers on your face for a very long time - until your sniffling gradually disappears. Only then does he ask simply, “The reason?”

“I’m very incredible. I’m really very incredible.”

Seeing his calm, unmoved expression, I hurriedly rack my brains, and elaborate. “My Evol allows me to control any Evolvers within range, I have a keen perception, and even attained the first place in school.” His expression remains unchanged, and you end with a conclusion, hoping to salvage the situation. “Trust me, Captain Gavin. With me around, you... and the other colleagues from STF will no longer get injured.”

After this speech, it occurs to you that you might have been overly straightforward. You decide to add, “STF lacks an Evolver with spirit. I feel duty bound to answer this call, and step forward bravely.”

The more you speak, the more you feel like you’re building a weak case for yourself, and all you want to do is bury your head into the ground.

As expected, Gavin doesn’t appear to be impressed, and doesn’t even bother altering his expression. In the harsh environment of STF which requires one to numb oneself to life and death, not many people are willing to choose such a path.

But people like you who harbour talent and the mentality of a new soldier wanting to save the world are more common. After all, battlefields always require people who are willing to die in the name of their convictions. They might not be strong, but they are loyal. When it comes to honouring their duty, they are mighty.

He has likely seen too many people similar to you. People who volunteer their services in the heat of passion. With an official tone, he gives you his response. “The STF has its regulations. If you pass the probation period, you’ll naturally have the chance to go on missions with everyone.”

“Also,” he adds. “Reality is much more cruel than what you imagine. Instead of crying over someone else’s wounds, why not think about how to make yourself even stronger - this way, you won’t let yourself or other people get hurt.”

With this, he shuts his eyes, resuming his rest.

He had stapled a non-romantic definition to the reason for your tears. And you have no way of telling him that they were not simply products of a young woman’s fragile emotions.

Crying is a meaningless act, but what else can you do?

Poverty, coughing, and romantic affection are unable to be controlled.

And you tears are unable to be controlled either.

[ 5 ]

Unable to get past the 887th stage of the mobile game, you’re in the midst of strategising your next move when Eli tosses a green ID card onto your office desk. It lands with a “thump”.

You lift your head, looking at Eli as he sits at the desk opposite yours. He throws you a can of beer, and a: “You’re amazing!”

Catching the can, you use a coin to crack it open. The mildly bitter taste flows down your throat, and it’s so cold that you shiver. Even though you already tried suppressing the happiness in your heart, a smile still creeps onto your face.

“So-so.”

“There’s no need to be so humble!” Eli cracks open his own can of beer. His tone is direct. “I’ve been here for so long, but it’s the first time I met the Director. And it’s all because I assisted a little employee with a transfer. I’m truly basking in your glory.”

You take small sips of the beer, saying the phrase that you once used countless times, and garnered much envy and hate from. “You’ll get used to it.”

Eli bursts into laughter. Before you can roll your eyes at him, he suddenly asks, “Do you like Gavin?”

He’s referring to Gavin. Not Captain Gavin.

You resist the urge to spit out the beer in your mouth. While swallowing it carefully, you crunch the empty can underneath your feet, then toss it into the dustbin situated three metres away. Although it flies in the air in a beautiful arc, it regretfully lands beside the bin.

Eli picks up the crushed can, throwing it into the bin. Then, he holds up his unfinished drink towards you.

“Don’t get so agitated. I was just wondering why someone like you - with such a good family background and powerful abilities - would join a dangerous place offering you such harsh conditions. So I read through your file, and found that you, Gavin, and I were from the same police academy. No wonder you acted a little odd when you met him the first time.. Right from the start, you joined because of him. Right, MC? Or should I call you... Junior?”

You smile, neither admitting nor denying it. Instead, you counter with a question. “Does Gavin know that you’re this gossipy behind his back?”

Throwing his now-empty can into the bin, he straightens his clothes and responds. “Don’t worry. He doesn’t know it yet. It’s a good thing we’re considered friends. So I’d know if he brings you up.” He pauses, then continues. “You should stop caring about Gavin.”

“Why?”

Eli walks over, giving you a pat on the head. “It’s a long story, and I can’t explain it succinctly. In short, if you can forget about him, forget him. If you can’t forget about him, run away quickly. This is the prime of your youth, so there’s no need to waste it on the STF, and there’s no need to waste it on Gavin. Also, we have a Grade S mission tonight, and you’ll be following Gav... Captain Gavin. Make sure you’re prepared.”

Whenever people fall into the river of love, people often say that you shouldn’t waste your youth on one person, as though youth is something amazing.

But when you think about it, you find that the thing you most cherish in youth, and the thing worth returning to over and over again, is the time you devoted your entire heart to wasting.

[ 6 ]

It’s been two months since you last saw Gavin.

In the break room just before the mission commences, you see him decked out in full military gear. He looks so handsome that his picture could be used as promotional material for the National University of Defense Technology.

Expressionless, he scans the team. Finally, his eyes land on you. Furrowing his brows, he asks, “Why aren’t you wearing a bulletproof vest?”

You stare at the new vest at the side, giving him a shrug. “I don’t need it. The enemy can't hurt me.”

Also, you’re worried that the bulletproof vest would be too bulky for your somewhat petite frame.

“Put it on.”

He speaks in a tone which leaves absolutely no room for discussion, and he exudes a rare, imposing manner of a high-ranking official.

Quietly, you pick up the vest and wear it.

Likely sensing that his tone was overly harsh earlier, he steps closer a little unnaturally to explain. “In every mission, there are many uncertain factors. Being overly confident is being irresponsible to yourself.” Saying this, he seems to realise that you aren’t the type of person who would be responsible for yourself. So he adds, “Think about the people who care about you.”

The reason suffices to convince you, although it would have worked better if he had said: “Think about the people you care about”.

When you disembark from the vehicle and see a huge, disorderly mass of civilians and Evolvers rushing over, you get goosebumps.

Evolvers and ordinary citizens have never had a difference in actual strength. The difference lay in talent. Although you were especially terrifying to Evolvers, you couldn’t do much about normal citizens.

On this evening, five of you have been deployed to the scene, and can be considered to be the elites. It shouldn’t be a problem dealing with ten or fifteen Evolvers.

But when you see the vast group of people before you, you can’t help but feel anxious.

“We’ll buy time while waiting for assistance.” Gavin commands in a soft voice, frowning. “I’ve already contacted the armed police. We just need to handle the Evolvers. The civilians will be left to the police.”

Eli and the others nod. Using the car as the base, they form an inverted triangle with you in the middle. This formation takes into account how your Evol provides the strongest assistance. To an Evolver, losing his abilities is akin to being a sheep out of its enclosure.

But your Evol has its weaknesses. And its greatest weakness is you.

You feel dizzy at the sight of blood.

It’s likely a shortcoming resulting from the time you were shot in the abdomen and felt warm blood gushing out of your wound. Since then, whenever you see a patch of crimson or smell the scent of blood, you’d feel dizzy and experience heart palpitations.

Which mission wouldn’t involve blood?

You force yourself to concentrate on the swarming flood of enemies as they rush forward, so that you can use your abilities at the earliest possible instance.

Gavin is standing on your left. It’s obvious that he is on the alert. The veins on his arms are evident, and the surrounding wind rustles from his Evol.

The battle is about to begin.

The other side has also come prepared. Knowing about the existence of someone harbouring the “stagnation” ability, they plan to adopt a human wave attack. But Gavin’s wall of wind prevents them from taking a step closer. Naturally, most of the firepower is targeted towards him, preparing to break your team’s small but sturdy formation by taking him down first.

You know that Gavin has always been good at fighting, even though many claimed that he rose to his position at such a young age because of his father. But how could the glory of one’s family bless one from escaping death time and time again?

However, even the most fearsome lion isn’t impervious to the bite of a stray dog. He’s gradually unable to hold off the firepower. A small tear appears in the wall of wind. And this is the chance the other side has been waiting for. Without a hint of hesitation, someone takes aim and shoots at the hole. It’s too late for the team to react, and they can only watch as the bullet whizzes towards Gavin.

You lunge forward without a thought.

Perhaps you were always waiting for this moment, ever since you saw him wounded in the infirmary.

You’re not brave.

But you like him.

And it’s precisely because you like him that you’re brave enough to move forward.

The collision of the back of your head with the solid car results in an earth-shattering noise. The sudden sharp pain makes you blank out for a few seconds, and you hear someone calling your name loudly before you sink into a boundless darkness.

[ 7 ]

When you regain consciousness, you’re in the hospital. Eli is sitting at the edge of the bed, paring an apple.

Noticing your gaze, he responds before you can even open your mouth. “I know what you’re going to ask. Gavin was here earlier, but left after the doctor said you were fine. There are still many things he has to deal with.”

You nod, eyes drifting to the drip tube attached to your hand.

“You’re okay, just a mild concussion. It’s a good thing you had the bulletproof vest on, or you’d be in the ICU right now.” He hands you a poorly pared apple. “Was it worth it?”

Goosebumps appear on your skin at his words, which sound as though they were extracted from a soap opera script.

You take a huge bite of the apple, the sour yet sweet juices filling your mouth. “Don’t ask me whether it was worth it. Ask if I’m happy or not.”

Not waiting for Eli to respond, you continue. “I’m happy. I was able to do something for him. I did it gladly.”

Eil’s hand trembles slightly, then he pats the top of your head gently. “You’re truly a fool...”

Later, Gavin pays you a visit. You’ve just woken up from a sweet dream, and the sky is already darkening. He’s standing at the window in a daze. Although you wish to stare at him for a while longer, he’s too sharp, and quickly realises that you’re awake.

“Feeling better?” He turns around and asks.

You nod.

He draws the curtains, letting the remnants of sunlight stream in. Then, he picks the sofa farthest away from the bed, and sits down. You know what he’s going to talk about.

“I hope this wouldn’t happen again.”

It’s exactly what you expected. You shut your eyes. In a hoarse voice, you defend yourself. “You don’t need to care about it.”

After all, you did it willingly.

He frowns and glances at you, as though he’s trying to find the correct words to say. Finally, he leaves you with a stiff sentence. “You don’t need to sacrifice yourself for other people.”

You smile, wanting to respond with: “But you aren’t 'other people’”.

After thinking about it for a very long time, you decide that you lack the guts to say it.

In the end, you respond with what’s expected of you.

“Got it, Captain Gavin.”

[ 8 ]

It’s an old STF tradition to gather for a meal after a successful mission. When you see Gavin dealing somewhat awkwardly with the service staff’s overly enthusiastic ‘interrogations’, you feel like chuckling.

The world works in strange ways. Just a week ago, you were at death’s door. But right now, you’re standing here, watching as Gavin struggles between a half-spicy and half-mild hotpot or a mala hotpot.

Truly, the most ordinary things bring the most comfort.

Foodies love talking about their feelings over a meal. Before, you had mostly interacted with Eli. In the span of a single meal, however, you find yourself growing much closer to the team. Gavin is exceptionally quiet at the table. The person whose expression doesn’t change when faced with ferocious enemies, the most difficult circumstances, is currently red in the face and neck from the spiciness of the dishes. Even the tip of his nose is coated in a sheen of sweat.

He looks ravishing. It’s the first time your heart has fluttered so much during a meal. He seems to be ill at ease, and keeps checking his phone.

In the middle of the hotpot, you receive a call from your father. Gripping your phone, you head to the only quiet spot you can find.

After exchanging a few words with your father, you hang up.

The clamour from outside drifts over, and you rub your slightly swollen temples. Suddenly, you don’t really feel like going back. You’d rather embrace this rare moment of tranquility.

Coincidentally, once this thought flits through your mind, you hear footsteps approaching. You’re standing on one of the higher stairs, which happens to be cloaked in shadows. If one doesn’t pay attention, they wouldn’t be able to spot you.

The owner of the footsteps leaves you frozen in place.

It’s Gavin.

He has removed his jacket, and is only wearing a white t-shirt. The look in his eyes is even deeper than the shadows. Ever since the two of you reunited, this is the first time you get the chance to observe him from such a close distance.

He coughs lightly at the seemingly empty corridor, then takes out his phone, preparing to make a call.

Despite this unexpected turn of events, you have no intention of eavesdropping. However, making an appearance now would just make things awkward.

While you’re still mulling over what would be the best course of action, the line gets through.

It’s as if someone flipped a switch on him.

For the first time, you see a gentle expression on his face.

“What are you up to?” He says softly, reminiscent of someone afraid of waking another from a dream.

You can’t hear what’s being said on the other end, but you can see his tender gaze and the insuppressible tugging at the corners of his lips.

“Just coming off a mission. I'm tired.”

He leans against a railing next to the stairs, subconsciously loosening his tie. At this moment, all his accumulated fatigue finally pours out in torrents.

He doesn’t say much after this. A faint smile lingers on his face. It seems the person at the other end of the line is planning something, and his smile grows more and more evident as he keeps agreeing with “mm”, “sure”, “anything you say”.

In the end, he glances at his watch, realising that he doesn’t have much time left. Softly, he says, “It’s late. Rest early. Goodnight.”

It’s a beautiful scene - giving someone a call after a busy day of work, talking about weekend plans, sharing each others’ lives, and basking in the joy of having someone concerned about you.

The only regretful thing is that the person on the other end of the line isn't you.

[ 9 ]

Only after a long while after Gavin leaves do you drag your numb feet out of your hiding spot. You spot Eli at the end of the corridor, smoking a cigarette. He looks you up and down, as though trying to verify something.

“Are you okay?” He asks hesitantly.

“I’m fine.”

The moment the words leave your lips, you feel your face heat up. Tears spill from your eyes, and you use the back of your hands to wipe at your face.

“It’s just an old habit. I'm like this whenever I get too emotional. Could you give me a cigarette? It’d help me calm down.” You explain, realising that Eli has no idea what happened.

With a conflicted expression, Eli retrieves a cigarette box from his pocket. He picks one cigarette bud and hands it to you. Placing it between your trembling lips, he lights it. It works wonders. The moment you inhale, you feel your entire body immersed in a warm scent. Encased in smoke, you hear Eli speak. “The last time, I mentioned that it was a long story. But if you want to hear it, I can cut it short.”

“I want to hear it.”

“That person is his junior. Gavin has known her for many years, and has liked her for just as many years. All these things you're doing...” He glances at you, then lights a new cigarette. “They don’t mean much to him. You saw the way he looked when he was making the call, right? It’s only for one person in the entire world. Nobody else.”

The tears surge forth once again. While you rush to wipe them away, you berate Eli. “Damn it! Why can’t you be more considerate to how I feel?”

Seeing that you’re crying even more fiercely, he stops his cutting remarks. Instead, he tousles your hair, then rifles through his wallet for a picture of Gavin. “It’s not for sale. I’ll give it to you as a souvenir.”

You take the photograph from him. It’s one that was taken a very long time ago, and its edges are curled. Under the dim lights, you take this old photograph in your hand, and are transported to the time of Gavin’s youth. He’s standing on the roof of the school, his blue and white uniform blowing with the wind. One hand is on the railing, and another is holding on to a paper airplane. With a slight smile, he turns back to look at the camera. Behind him is the azure sky.

Back then, none of these regrets blossomed yet.

“I don’t know if I appeared too early, or too late.”

Eli stares at you, his gaze sympathetic. “Sometimes, it’s not about whether you’re early or late. I’m not sure if you’ll understand if I put it this way - There won’t be another person. There’s only her. Gavin isn’t the sort of person who would like someone because they treat him well. It’s only when he likes someone that he'd accept that person’s kindness.”

“But,” he continues. “Even if the ending remains the same, you can change its course. After all, if you want a wound to heal completely, the best way is to remove the rotten areas. Perhaps what other people say is useless. You could try listening to his answer directly.”

You nod.

Loving someone requires devotion. One will always have to experience all sorts of hardship before it can come to fruition.

[ 10 ]

By the time you and Eli return, the meal has almost reached an end. Your colleagues are preparing to head over for karaoke next door. When you are all packed into the lift, you happen to stand behind Gavin. He has his jacket on, and his sleeves are pulled up, revealing a black plaited bracelet on his wrist. No matter how slow-witted you are, you’re able to recognise that it’s part of a couple set advertised by a certain brand a long time ago.

Behind you, a couple of drunk colleagues start causing a ruckus and bumping against your back. In the crowded lift, you shuffle your feet, trying to steady yourself, and trying to maintain a certain distance between the two of you.

Sometimes, you can’t comprehend your strange ego and pride. You’ve seen girls showering the guys they like with gifts, and wearing beautiful dresses to invite them out to movies. But you’ve never thought of imitating them. You’d even secretly celebrate when they get rejected - You were so glad that you were different from them.

But today, you realise that you aren’t that different from them. You aren’t even as candid as they are.

The lively atmosphere is a stark contrast to your mood. Upon entering the karaoke room, you find a corner and isolate yourself with popcorn. Despite giving out clear signals that you’d rather not be disturbed, the officers pull you over to play ‘Truth or Dare’, calling it a necessary rite of passage for new members.

The rules are simple - when the mouth of the bottle points at you, you have to choose to answer a question truthfully, or do a dare.

You have very good luck, and the bottle continually points at other colleagues, and you get to hear all sorts of gossip, and witness several 'dares’.

After a while, the person responsible for spinning the bottle starts targeting you. When the mouth of the bottle finally points at you, you actually heave a sigh of relief.

It’s better to get this over and done with.

Without any hesitation, you pick ‘dare’. After all, there’s too big of a risk in choosing ‘truth’. A bespectacled colleague reads out your task.

“Choose one guy in the room, lean in close to his ear, and say the words: ‘I love you’.”

You freeze in place, a million emotions bustling in your heart.

Honestly speaking, you never really believed in coincidences before. You felt that these were just things used to dupe the superstitious. But at this moment, this meaningless game started making you believe that coincidences do exist.

Perhaps this is what people often call “fate”.

In the midst of the hooting from the audience in response to your task, you deliberately ignore the conflicted expression on Eli’s face. You stand up while your colleagues whip out their phones, ready to snap pictures and videos. They’re all ready to, as usual, capture memories they can look back on fondly each year.

Everyone is exuberant, and nobody notices your apprehension.

Your eyes fall on Gavin, who is seated at a corner. His brows are knitted slightly, expression indifferent. The black earrings on his ears reflect the cold light. When he doesn’t speak, he gives off an aura of not being close to anyone.

You imagine how he must have been like in high school - a bad boy with his hair dyed, riding a motorcycle, causing a ruckus in school, attaining poor grades, and always pretending to be cool by having earplugs in his ears while sitting at the corner of the classroom.

Until this day, a certain impatience can still be felt from this man. It’s very obvious, and can be noted with a single glance.

When your colleagues realise that your target is Gavin, the clamour grows even louder. Choosing a superior as a target of a dare - they must think that you have a playful spirit. You pause before Gavin, and the exaggerated exclamations are about to burst through the roof.

But when you muster the courage to lean in Gavin’s ear to say that phrase “I love you”, the surroundings lapse into silence almost immediately.

Maybe your expression was too serious. Maybe your tone was too sincere. Either way, everyone’s reaction tells you very clearly - you messed it up. The colleagues who were holding up their phones earlier in anticipation are now feeling awkward and not knowing what to do.

All is quiet.

That is, until Eli breaks the silence. “This round doesn’t count - it’s so boring. Let’s change the target. MC, what about me?”

Gavin purses his lips into a slight smile, patting Eli’s hand which is resting on his shoulder. “Get lost. Don’t use our female colleagues to joke around.”

With this, the tension in the air dissipates. Everyone diverts the topic, and they begin the next round.

In the next few hours, you drink a lot. You puke a lot too, and it feels as though your guts are about to spill out.

Eli is the one who sends you home. He supports you into the car, and you hear Gavin telling him softly, “Give me a call when you’ve reached.”

Because of what he says, you end up crying all the way home.

To you, he’s the perfect superior. A worthy comrade-in-arms. A righteous stranger. But he’ll never a reliable lover.

That night, you have a dream about Gavin.

In it, you can’t see his face clearly. He’s wearing a loose school uniform, and is alone in the basketball court, dribbling a ball, a plaster on his hand.

It’s a very realistic dream.

You’re sitting afar off and watching him. Occasionally, the ball would roll to a place near you. When you finally think of picking it up, you see Gavin running over. He’s so close that you can see strands of sweat-drenched hair on his forehead. You try reaching out to touch him, but you just can’t do it. It’s as though there’s a transparent film between the two of you. No matter how close you are, you can only be a member of the audience.

When you wake up, you’re facing the ceiling. Someone once told you that you’d forget the contents of your dreams the moment you turn. So you lie stiffly for a very long time, trying to remember as many details of the dream as you can.

Sunlight streams in through the curtains.

You finally turn to your side, and tears stream down the side of your face.

Even in dreams, you can’t obtain a happy ending.

[ 11 ]

After that night, because of your father’s position and how you faint at the sight of blood, you are quickly transferred to a commanding post instead of having to be deployed on missions.

In an instant, you become Gavin’s superior.

Unlike in fiction where female superiors who experience unrequited love torment the target of their affections, or use their position to seduce them, you have no intention of doing so. Instead, you simply treat him much more coldly than a normal superior would.

Occasionally, in the middle of night, you’d have the urge to ask him a question.

"Why can’t it be me?”

But you know that this question has been buried in the last page of your diary, hidden in the corner of your bookshelf. It decomposes in your innermost heart - a place where no one has ever seen.

Because you already know the answer.

On the night when make-believe turned out to be reality, you had leaned in close to his ear, and said “I love you” in a trembling voice. Back then, he had turned his face away slightly, his expression grave and stern, reminiscent of the marble stone that you used to touch when you were small.

You know that it’d never be you.

Sometimes, when Eli takes Gavin’s place to give reports, you’d pull him out for a meal and drinks.

On one particular evening when you had drunk quite a fair amount, he leaned on the table and looked at you. “Have you let go?”

You secretly stole a prawn from his plate. While munching on it, you responded, “I’ve let go.”

You truly have.

Which is why afterwards, when you and Gavin were selected as stellar graduates to return to your alma mater and give a speech, the emotions in your heart were not turbulent.

You vaguely remember that the sunset on that day was very beautiful.

The yellowish golden sun was gradually disappearing below the horizon, as beautiful as a painting - the most beautiful sunset in your life.

He stood by your side with a depth in his eyes - the most detailed stroke in this painting, etched onto your heart.

Although you tried to suppress the urge, you decided to speak. “I always hoped to get a chance to return to this place with you again. I didn’t think it’d come true. I’m left with no regrets.”

He frowned slightly. Even though he tried to conceal it, you could sense a twinge of awkwardness. He looked as though he wanted to speak, but didn’t.

You chuckled.

“I once thought that the reason why I came to STF, why I went on missions with you, and helped you take that bullet, was for you. But now I know that it was to complete myself.”

“I don’t need a response from you. In my years of youth, meeting someone like you was already my fortune.”

He froze, lapsing into a long silence. In the end, he says: “Thank you.”

His shoulders relaxed, as though he had set down a large boulder, and was relieved of a heavy load.

You had nothing much to regret. What’s there to regret? As compared to yourself, you’d prefer for him to get what he wanted.

Thousands of years ago, a poet called Su She once said that the flow of the river and the waning of the moon are simply temporary changes. From a broader, long-term perspective, they are never-changing.

When you first heard it, you weren’t able to draw any lessons from it.

But when you flipped through Khalil Gibran’s collection, you were finally enlightened. After being troubled for so many years, everything finally made sense with just one sentence.

Gibran said: “Love possesses not, nor will it be possessed. For love is sufficient unto love.”

[ Permission to translate ]

礼里图: You can move it over if you state the source. It’s even better when more people can like it~

#mlqc #mlqc gavin #I'll never recover from this one-shot but it's okay

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hillbillyoracle · 4 years

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Shadow Work for the Community: What Do You Really Want With Witchcraft?

I've been wanting to write something like this for quite a while but I've been a bit nervous to honestly. I know it'll come off really harsh to some, that to a certain extent it'll be painting a target on my back but I really feel it needs to be said.

Witchblr has committed hard to the "all paths are valid" line, often regardless of anything else. And honestly, as long as you're not touching traditions that aren't yours to touch, I'm on board...with a fairly major caveat. All paths are valid - for the destinations they take you to.

I'm seeing so many people practice paths that lead to certain destinations and then get frustrated that place isn't what they wanted. And I feel for folks, I do. It's really hard to sort through the noise, especially as a beginner. A lot of folks just don't have the frame of reference to be able to evaluate practices and it's not really their fault because a big part of what makes things hard for novices is Witchblr's inability to distinguish between emotion and effect when it comes to magic.

So many people spend their time creating mood boards, playlists, "10 ways to add a little magic to your everyday" lists trying to capture a feeling. And if your goal is to essentially cosplay a witch, to inhabit that role for a bit, to feel a certain way for a while - all of those things are effective. They create a very real state change which can have cascading possible effects. Having a way to modulate your mood and increase self esteem can feel or even be magic to many. I endorse it in the same way I support people pursuing whatever subculture or special interest they may have.

The downside is that this creates a lot of noise for folks who are trying to find sources on how to practice magic to effect real change in their lives. They're looking to get a job, keep their home safe, attract or maintain a lover. While I'm sure lifestyle witchcraft has helped some folks do those things, I've personally found it incredibly lack luster when it comes to results. Stirring my tea clockwise and "putting energy into it" can be really pleasant and nice - but it's not going to come anywhere near what even paper astrological talismans have done.

There's also an element of class and race to this issue that the Witchblr community doesn't seem keen to confront. I've seen the feelings oriented lifestyle witchcraft crop up the most in white middle class practitioners who are primed to consume their way to solutions because they've always had the means. It's at odds with many of the folk practices they've co-opted imagery from, practices that were often focused on turning available materials in to a solution that was otherwise unattainable to them often because of their class or race. It can honestly come across as one more way folks with more privilege take from those who have less to feel more authentic when they don't have a culture of their own to pull from. I see some folks point to their gender as what give them the right, but that sidesteps the historical record of white women of means often policing folks practices and trying to eradicate them - not participating in them themselves.

And not confronting that means people often miss out on practices that don't require pulling from less privileged groups. Chaos magic is fairly neutral. Astrological magic was common at points among the elite and is now more accessible than it once was. But I bet why folks aren't pulling from these as much as they could is because it doesn't come with that sense of authenticity, of "realness" that people seem to be looking for in practices.

I also know a lot of folks are going to say things along the lines of "but I'm disabled and this is what's accessible to me - it's no less valid." To which I say, if it actually works for you keep doing it but "valid" just isn't a word that makes a lot of sense here. It's valid for me to cook during a fibro flare - but it's going to leave me writhing in pain that takes days to recover from. It's valid for me to try to hold down a job - but it doesn't mean that I'll physically or mentally able to. Like I get it, when so much of the world is reminding you you're limited, you want to feel like your spiritual practice isn't but the fact of the matter is we are. I've yet to practice some form of effective magic that didn't require time, effort, means, and skill and I am often lacking in one of more of those thanks for my fibromyalgia.

This is all to say - you do you. I don't have the time or inclination to police folks. But in the information you spread, it would be helpful if you talked about what you were looking to get, whether the practices you were recommending actually helped you, and what your evidence for that assessment was. This could really go a long way to helping out novices who are trying to comb through these materials.

And for folks who are into lifestyle witchcraft, who's goal is to feel a certain way, please consider what sources you're pulling from to feel that way. Are you co-opting a practice and imagery that isn't really yours given your race or class? Are you inadvertently pulling from fiction that pulls from those sources? By all means, enjoy your witchsonas, add a little magic to your day, but just please consider the folks who originated the imagery and practices you're pulling from. Even if they were white and women, it's worth considering whether you're trying to consume their image when they were punished for it. It's worth considering if your romanticize of country life erases the hardships rural practitioners, historical and current day face.

Just be honest about what you want. Evaluate whether your practice is actually working. Understand why the image you want to inhabit has power and consider whether you're only interacting with it on a surface level. I promise, you'll not only be helping yourself out but the whole community in the process.

#witchblr #witch #witchcraft #magic #shadow work #not looking forward to the replies on this one

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mbti-notes · 4 years

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Hi mbti-notes, I hope you're doing well. I am an INFP young black American and the past few weeks have been such a nightmare. I obviously support the protests that have been taking place but I feel so hopeless at the same time. I've never been a fan of this country but the past few weeks have at least provided me with more clarity and conviction that there is nothing to be salvaged here. I have a friend who's also black but lives in europe and even we're at a loss for what to say to each (con't)

[con’t: other. I feel so angry and disgusted. I remember learning that as a part of anti-US propaganda during the Cold War, they’d show how black people have been treated in America and be like “this is how they treat their own people”. I’m not saying I support the USSR of course but it surprised me to hear that in the eyes of other countries, we’re as American as anyone else. It never felt that way. People can’t even protest police brutality without being faced with more police brutality. I’ve donated to bail funds, signed petitions, contacted my representatives about a piece of legislation that would help combat the issue of missing and murdered indigenous women but...I think the closest thing there is to a solution is for another Great Migration but this time, we just leave America. I feel bad saying that because obviously so many people don’t have the means to do so and it shouldn’t have to come to this but nobody wants us here. If the black panthers...]

It seems that tumblr disappeared the rest of your message, but I've read enough to detect some problematic thinking. It’s not about whether you’re “wanted”, it’s about the fact that you have a right to exist and be treated as human, equal to every other human under the law. It is beyond the scope of this blog to address politics and write political commentary. This blog primarily addresses individuals and how they cope with their circumstances. I won’t be able to understand all the experiences that you’ve had as a black American given such a short message from you. All I can do is bring to light your attitude and beliefs and how they affect your ability to cope and thrive in life.

Developmentally, irrational pessimism is always something that INFPs should be vigilant about due to Fi-Si loop and the struggle to develop Ne big-picture thinking skills. There is certainly lots of injustice in the world, but this doesn't mean that there isn't also a lot of good in the world. There are many good people out there doing good things, otherwise, you’d have nothing to donate money to. There are also a lot of decent people who understand that racism is a big problem but don’t know what to do about it. Yet your mind is only ever trained on the pain and suffering - this indicates Fi extremes. I have a longstanding habit of observing how different people respond to challenges in life. For example, I see some black Americans out there protesting, some are educating people, some are attacking people, some are sowing anarchy, some are running for office, some are giving up, some are hiding, some are writing, some are leading legislative initiatives. Black Americans as a group share the burden of racism, but each person handles it in their own way. What is your response and why?

You focus on the problems, drowning in negative feelings, and perhaps even look for evidence to reinforce the belief that everything is irredeemable (misuse of Si), which means that you lack a big picture perspective. For your own well-being, perhaps you need to make wiser decisions about how you spend your time, where you focus your energy, and with whom you associate. Otherwise, you are only ever a victim of circumstance, bending and breaking with every gust of wind. If there are things/people in your life that exacerbate your tendency to be negative, it's up to you to adjust your decision making so that you are not always surrounded by the negative. Just as you keep physically healthy by not eating crap food, you should keep mentally healthy by not feeding yourself a constant diet of emotional negativity. For example, people tend to be much more pessimistic when they spend too much time on social media or consuming political commentary that is designed to be emotionally provocative. Perhaps there are healthier ways to spend your time. Whether you followed this or that tweet is of little significance if it only ends up with you feeling miserable.

With respect to moving: There are a variety of methods to measure the health and well-being of a society, and it's natural to think about how your country stacks up against others. Different societies have their own character and excel at different things. However, it's important to remember that there is no society without problems. Some countries are better at hiding their problems than others. Europe is no paradise, as there have been long running problems with colonialist and xenophobic attitudes. American society tends to be very extraverted and media driven, so its problems are often hanging out there for all to see, which might make them seem a lot worse than they really are.

Each aspect of society, whether you think it is positive or negative, is the result of a trade-off. For example, people often respect the U.S. for its staunch commitment to free speech, which allows for marginalized voices to be heard. But the trade-off is that you may get a more noisy and toxic social environment, as all voices get elevated and amplified. The question for you, as an individual, is whether the trade-offs are worth it for the kind of life that you would like to live. With the example of free speech, I’d rather have free speech, so I’m willing to tolerate all the noise and accept it as the cost of doing business. Nobody can make these sorts of judgments for you, as you are the best person to decide what's best for you. Thus, I'm not sure what to tell you. I only remind people that the decision making process works best when you give proper consideration to EVERY side of an issue, as opposed to being myopic, extreme, or one-sided.

Right now, there is a lot of frustration and anger floating around. Being so emotional basically means being myopic, as you are hyperfocused on the things that make you sad or angry. This will blind you to everything else. When you lose sight of the positive, Ne might start to believe that the grass is greener elsewhere. There's no denying that the problem of racism against black people runs very deep in American society, all the way back to the founding of the nation on the backs of slaves. But are you denying that progress has been made?

When people use the word "progress" in relation to history, they mainly refer to how things changed for the better. I think people too often forget that progress almost always comes at a steep COST. Society doesn’t change because people miraculously get “enlightened” en mass. No. People suffer, things get mangled, blood is shed, and there is a period of intense pain and sacrifice - these details tend to get glossed over in history classes as hindsight and nostalgia take over. Creation and destruction are two sides of the same coin. Thinking that you can create something new and better without destroying what is old and obsolete is wishful thinking. To be clear, I'm not advocating destruction; I'm only saying that, in reality, you cannot escape destruction, as it is a necessary stage in the process of creation. If you are unlucky, you get to live during "interesting" times. But, viewed from a bigger perspective, it also means that you get to live during a time when you have a chance to make a difference and what you do matters. From this perspective, being alive right now is better than living during a time of being forced into accepting the status quo, is it not?

What is society other than the people comprising it? Societal problems are analogous to psychological problems in that they are deep-seated, long-running, festering, recurring, and difficult to resolve. I believe that there is a qualitative shift in attitude right now. It doesn't mean that racism will suddenly get fixed once and for all, but I've not seen such widespread attention and commitment to the problem in a long time. It actually gives me hope. I have older friends who've remarked that they suddenly feel transported back to the unrest of the 1960s. IMO, it means that another period of progress is on the horizon, but it also means that a time of intense turmoil is here. It seems that you focus on the turmoil and miss seeing the openings and opportunities for change.

Another thing that INFPs should always be vigilant about is a shaky relationship to reality and/or being unable to tackle problems in a realistic way (i.e. poor Ne and Te development). Reality contains everything, including the good and the bad, so it’s no use to try to pretend that one or the other doesn’t exist. You will always make better decisions by taking BOTH the good and the bad into consideration. Some INFPs get stuck in trying to wish away the bad, and some drown in the bad and disconnect from everything good.

Just as a child picks up a mix of psychological issues from their parents, as a member of society, your identity is forged through your relationship to your society's (problematic) history. I don't see how a "great migration" is any solution. Don’t forget that technology has made our world significantly smaller, so it’s a lot harder to distance from these problems. As long as you carry the scars of your home, no matter where you go, unresolved pain will continue to haunt you and hurt you. There is historical evidence that utopian thinking never leads to anything resembling a utopia. Utopian thinking is what people resort to when they are incapable of confronting the problems of reality. When it comes to human psychology, there is no way to wipe the slate completely clean without confronting and addressing the mistakes and sins of the past - this is what social unrest is meant to achieve. To believe that you can/should “start from scratch” is often a sign of Te grip in INFPs, as they want to violently wipe out the accumulated burdens of Si loop.

Perhaps there are benefits for you, as an individual, to move away, as you might find happiness in a different sort of life. But what happens when the advocates give up and walk off? At the societal level, good people moving away only leaves the bad actors to wreak havoc on the poor and innocent. Certainly, some individuals do move away and successfully build a better life for themselves. However, some people move away only to discover that they miss home dearly, and they end up roaming aimlessly, lonely, miserable, bitter, or disappointed. What separates the two groups? You will find a better life when you know exactly what you're looking for and you're realistic about whether the new place will meet those terms and conditions. You will NOT find a better life if you're merely running away from unhappiness, fueled by wishful thinking that the grass is greener "anywhere but here". It's up to you to be honest about what's happening with you.

#infp #si loop #te grip #politics #activism #pessimism #ask

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creepingsharia · 4 years

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What is Islamization?

Originally posted on March 30, 2011 reposted for newer readers.

What is Islamization? An incomplete list. by Dr. Nicolai Sennels The word “Islamization” was originally coined by Muslims to describe the conversion of a kufr (infidel) society to an “enlightened” (Islamic) society. Islamization is a phenomenon that has existed since the Muslim prophet Mohammed lived 1,400 years ago. Islamization has been effective, since it is now the main religion in 57 countries. The association of Islamic countries, OIC, is the world’s largest supra-national organization, surpassed only by the UN. Three roads to Islamization One road to Islamization is to remove non-Islamic traditions and symbols. This is to avoid offending Muslims or expose Muslims to proselytizing by other faiths. It also aims to reduce competition from the country’s original religion and culture in order to improve the possibilities for further Islamization. An example is the Red Cross’ refusal to decorate for Christmas in their stores, or when banks no longer hands out piggy banks to their customers’ kids (because pigs are unclean in Islam) — in both situations in order not to offend Muslims and lose Muslim customers. Another way Islamization is accomplished is by making Islamic traditions and rules part of non-Islamic societies. Examples are reconstruction of public sports facilities to cater for Muslims’ inhibited views on nudity and contact between the sexes, or the imposition of leave on Islamic holidays. A third way Islamization achieved happens when certain areas or neighborhoods acquire such a high a proportion of Muslims that the country’s indigenous culture and people are pushed out. One example is when non-Islamic authorities such as police and fire departments meet with disrespect and sometimes even threats and violence, while imams, patrolling police-style Muslim fathers’ groups, homemade Sharia Courts, and Islamic mediation meetings are free to exercise their power. Another example is when Jews can not wear yarmulke or girls can not wear miniskirts in Muslim-dominated areas, because they risk being attacked. Islamization thus occurs through elimination of the indigenous culture, introduction of Islamic traditions and through immigration and the building of Muslim parallel societies. Disadvantages of Islamization There are many disadvantages of Islamization. The main issue is of course that it comes at the expense of our own culture, which is the foundation of our lifestyle, our sense of community and our well-functioning society. Also, our western culture is simply better than that of the Muslims because it is freer, includes human rights, and is more productive. In addition, Western culture makes people more self-confident, happy and loving, because unlike the Muslim culture it does not cultivate aggression, fragile feelings of honor, and intolerance against other faiths. Furthermore, we allow free speech and allow women and feminine qualities to bloom freely for the benefit of themselves, men, and society. Every time we introduce more Islamization to our society, it moves one step away from our own culture, and one step closer to the Muslim culture and a sharia-based society.

Islamization occurs at the expense of the indigenous culture and its norms. By harming the native culture, important life values are taken away from the people and the values and norms that bind our community together are undermined. The sense of community is fundamental to quality of life for us “pack” animals, and common core values are the foundation of the mutual trust, helpfulness, openness, understanding, and respect among a population.

Islamization dilutes the national identity among the indigenous population, because it dilutes our common culture. At the same time it strengthens the Muslims’ Islamic identity at the expense of national identity. National identity and sense of community are important for work morale, tax morale, morale in relation to benefit fraud and respect towards the nations laws and authorities. People who feel part of the community feel that they hurt themselves if they harm the community.

Islamization allows inhumane traditions take root in our society. The Koran’s prescriptions and the Muslim culture’s views on women, free speech, and other faiths are medieval. They are subversive to the democracy and human rights in a country — and whether it be little or much, or whether it is restricted to certain geographical areas, no such thing should take root in our society.

Islamization pushes the indigenous people out of the areas where Muslims and Muslim culture dominate. This is because the Muslim culture is so different from the Western that we find it hard to feel at home and comfortable, and because Islam and Muslim culture is racist towards non-Muslims.

Islamization makes it possible to retain Muslim traditionalists or Islamic extremists in our countries, because they can keep their Islamic traditions. This is counter-productive to integration and a source of homegrown Islamic extremism.

For every new Islamization of society, the step is shorter to the next Islamization. It is easier for Muslims to make claims when they can refer to the fact that we already accepted a large number of other similar claims.

Islamization provides maneuvering space for a political ideology that has oppression and extermination of all non-Muslims as both means and goal.

Examples of Islamization

The following examples of Islamization lead to one or more of the aforementioned disadvantages:

It is Islamization of our cities

when entire neighborhoods are dominated so strongly by the Muslim culture, Islamic values, and Muslim racism that the country’s culture and the indigenous population no longer feel at home and safe in the area. We should feel at home and welcome everywhere in our own country.

It is Islamization of our food

when halal foods are not labeled as such. By keeping consumers ignorant of what is Islamic food, we are forced to eat halal. By buying it, we contribute to Islamic “charity”, which helps fund terrorists, and support Muslim jobs at the expense of non-Muslims and food prices — for halal slaughter requires a Muslim to assist with the slaughter, and Muslim organizations are paid to approve the procedure. Food products are already labeled in detail in relation to content, health, and production methods to increase consumers’ ability to make conscious choices concerning their food. Of course halal must also be labeled.

It is Islamization of children’s schooling

when the state allows and supports Islamic schools and madrassas. Primary schools are our society’s most important cultural carrier and are intended to inform schoolchildren of the country’s indigenous culture and values.

It is Islamization of our urban design and architectural culture

when municipalities and the state permit the construction of large mosques and minarets. Arabic architecture does not belong in Western cities — and certainly not at very central, historical or visible locations.

It is Islamization of our country

when mosques are permitted. The mosques enforce and increase Islamic values among the area’s Muslims and often function as a springboard for political activity that works for the Islamization of the country.

It is Islamization of our way of being together

and of women when we allow burqas and the niqab in public spaces. In a democratic society, we should see each other’s faces, and women and men are equal and free to dress as they like.

It is Islamization of our public sports facilities

when swimming pools and locker rooms are closed or reconstructed so that Muslims can use them. It should a person’s personal choice of what religion and what view of nudity he allows. Personal choices should not restrict the citizens’ access to public taxpayer-funded facilities.

It is Islamization of our schools, institutions, workplaces and the rhythm of the year

when we create Muslim holidays and when municipalities and unions print Muslim holidays in our calendars. We have an adequate number of holidays in our country, and more holidays harm children’s academic development and loss of productivity in companies. The yearly rhythm is closely associated with a country’s history, traditions, and culture and plays an important role to our experience of holidays and seasons. This very basic rhythm of life should be experienced as being related to our own history and culture, and not be Islamized.

It is Islamization of our schools

when Muslims are excused from physical education and Christian education for religious reasons.

****BONUS - READIN’, WRITIN’, AND JIHADIN’The Islamization of American Public Schools (PDF)

It is Islamization of the stores

when they choose not to use Christian, cultural or national symbols in order not to offend Muslims or losing Muslim customers. Shop decorations are part of our culture and our cities’ street scene, and help to mark the seasons with Christmas ornaments, Easter eggs, carnival decorations, etc. Buyers should select stores that take a social responsibility for our society and culture.

It is Islamization of our public institutions and workplaces

when halal foods are included on the menu. Special diets due solely to personal choices of religion should not be funded by the state.

It is Islamization of our way of caring for children

when we ignore that they are being starved for religious reasons. Ramadan damages children’s ability to concentrate in school. In addition it affects the children’s social development, because hunger and fluctuating blood sugar make them emotionally unstable and aggressive. Starving of children should rightfully be categorized as neglect and punished as such.

It is Islamization when we ignore the fact

that a specific ethnic group of women in our own country are deprived of basic human rights on religious grounds. Women from non-Western countries should have a visit or meeting with municipality employees. These employees must advise migrant women about family planning and contraception. Additionally, employees should make sure that the women are free and safe. Finally, it is important that migrant women know their rights to women’s shelters, divorce and repatriation.

It is Islamization of the Danish government

when public sector workplaces have prayer rooms. Public workers are public servants, and thus taxpayers’ money should not be used for religious practices.

It is the Islamization of our jurisprudence

when we do not effectively stop homemade Sharia Courts and Islamic mediation meetings. Such things are organized vigilantism and a direct assault on the foundations of our social structure and sense of justice, and should be removed with the necessary methods.

It is Islamization of the justice system

when police ignore Muslims’ scorn, threats, and violence, and when the police invite Muslim fathers’ groups to help stop Muslim riots and gangs. It is harmful to the sense of justice in the country and undermines police authority.

It is the Islamization of our legal system

when we allow Sharia courts or give reduced sentences to perpetrators who have committed a crime for religious or cultural reasons (honor crimes).

It is Islamization of our population, electorate, and country

when we allow immigration from Muslim countries and when Europe do not protect us effectively against illegal immigration.

Nicolai Sennels is a psychologist and the author of “Among Criminal Muslims: A Psychologist’s experiences with the Copenhagen Municipality”.

#Islam #Muslim #Sharia #Jihad #Legal #Immigration #Politics #News #Media #Religion #Travel

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nickysurfer28 · 4 years

Text

Summary: it’s heating up between Dr.Nicky Ransom and Chris,Judith questions Nicky about Chris,Denise is finally home resting. Halloween party ?....

Word count: over 1k

Warning ⚠️: 18+ adults only.

Characters: Dr.Nicky Ransom x Chris Evans,Denise Ames (cousin),Judith (landlord,volunteer)

Chapter 6:

“Now, about you and Chris...”Judith answered.

You feel yourself blush.

Judith is way more perceptive than she has any right to be.

“Judith...there’s nothing going on between us.” Nicky answered. “He’s just helping me with Denise. That’s all.”

“Is it? What a shame. He seems very taken with you.” Judith answered with a smile.

“He does?... I mean- I don’t care.” Nicky answered.

Judith chuckles, shaking her head.

“Anyway, I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Nicky answered blushing.

“Cone on, honey. I’ve known you for some time now, and I wasn’t born yesterday!” Judith answered laughing. “You like him. I can tell.”

She doesn’t know the half of it. Especially since I’ve been having wild sex dreams about him lately...

“He’s quite a catch, isn’t he?” Judith answered smiling.

“Chris...really is a catch. I mean, I barely know him, but he seems pretty great.” Nicky answered blushing.

Judith grins wide, and you can’t help but blush.

“He is.” Judith answered with a smile. “So, are you going to ask him out?”

“Judith!” Nicky answered with shock.

“What? Denise is safe and sound now, and I know for a fact that you’re single.” Judith answered.

“Like I said, we barely know each other.” Nicky answered.

“So?” Judith answered.

Her smile softens into something kinder. “I’ve worked with Chris for some time now, and I can tell you that he’s a great man” Judith answered. “And it’s obvious that he likes you, too.”

You duck your head bashfully.

“I just can’t believe it’s taken us so long to meet.” Nicky answered. “Given the shared connection with you and Denise, I’d have expected our paths to cross much sooner.”

“He’s a private man. Keeps to himself quite a bit, bless him.” Judith answered.

As if on cue, Chris joins you and Judith in the kitchen, a frown marring his handsome face.

“She’s sleeping now.” Chris answered.

“What about her kidnapper? Did she remember...his name?” Nicky answered with shock. “We could look him up.”

He shakes his head sadly, sinking into the chair across from you.

“Nothing.” Chris answered sadly.

“This is all my fault. When she told me she was dating this guy, all I did was question her life choices.” Nicky answered sadly. “If I’d just been supportive, maybe she wouldn’t have-“

“No, Nicky. No part of this is your fault.” Chris answered with concern.

He takes your hand in his. Your heart clenches painfully...

Chris really is a sweetheart.

You lace your fingers through his. You breathe deeply, focusing on Chris’s warm, supportive presence.

“That’s very kind of you to say.” Nicky answered.

“I’m not being kind, Nicky, just honest.” Chris answered.

The tenderness in his blue eyes makes you own begin to water.

“Nicky...”Chris answered with concern.

He cups your cheek softly, wiping an errant tear away with his thumb. You let out a watery laugh.

“Thank you, Chris. I guess sometimes I forget that I can’t live Denise’s life for her.” Nicky answered.

“Lord, if that isn’t the truth.”Judith answered.

Judith pats Chris’s shoulder fondly. “All right, you two. Get on out of here and let my girl sleep.” Judith answered.

“Of course. Come on, Nicky. I’ll take you home.” Chris answered warmly.

Denise sleeping peacefully under a crocheted blanket on the couch as you file out of the kitchen. You feel a powerful urge to take her home with you so you can watch over her, but you tamp down.

She’ll recover faster in a familiar environment, Nicky. You know this.

You pull the blanket up to her chin and tuck it snugly around her.

“Please get better, Denise.” Nicky answered softly.

I can’t lose you,too.

Chris touches your shoulder softly.

“Ready to go?” Chris answered warmly.

His eyes look exhausted, and you feel a fresh pang of sympathy for him as you nod.

“As ready as I’ll ever be, I think.” Nicky answered.

“Judith will take good care of her, Nicky.” Chris answered.

“I know she will.”Nicky answered with a smile.

You follow him outside, praying that Judith’s care will be enough. Chris reaches the SUV first and opens your door for you. Despite your worries, you can’t help smiling.

Okay, no guy’s ever opened my car door for me.

“Why, Mr. Evans, I’m beginning to believe you may just be too good to be true.” Nicky answered with a smile.

Chris laughs, and your heart flutters as he takes your hand, helping you up into the SUV.

“I’m also beginning to suspect you consume as many historical romances as I do.” Nicky answered smiling.

Chris places a hand over his heart.

“You discovered my shameful secret!” Chris answered with his brow raised. “I’ve had a terrible crush on Lizzie Bennet from Pride and Prejudice. It’s consumed my life since I was a boy.”

“Nerd.” Nicky answered smiling.

“Says the woman with a Ph.D.” Chris answered smiling.

“Oh, shits fired!” Nicky answered laughing.

You both laugh together. Chris slides into the driver’s seat, and you’re off.

“So. Why didn’t you mention you knew Judith before?” Nicky answered.

Chris shrugs.

“It didn’t seems relevant at the time.” Chris answered.

“Fair enough.” Nicky answered. “How long have you known..Denise?”

“Two, almost three years? We met back when she applied for the Dreamseekers Foundation. She needed an apartment.” Chris answered. “I got her in contact, with Judith, and we’ve been friends ever since.”

“Wow. I had no idea.” Nicky answered.

It wasn’t just luck, then, that had gotten Denise’s life turned in the right direction. It was Chris.

Affection swells inside you.

“I can’t believe Denise never mentioned you. Well, no- I can believe it, actually.” Nicky answered. “Denise always been reserved. She’s never been super comfortable letting anyone know all the details of her life. Me included.”

“She’s not alone in that. We all have things we’d rather hide.”Chris answered.

There’s a melancholy note in his voice. You lean back in your seat, gazing out the window in contemplation.

“Now that I think of it, I’m pretty sure you’re the only person I’ve ever told about my sister. It’s funny, isn’t it? There are things you’ll tell a stranger that you’d never admit to a friend.” Nicky answered.

“Are we strangers?” Chris answered.

The question catches you off- guard. You consider it.

We’ve only known each other briefly, but... Chris is so easy to be around. I fell like I’ve known him forever.

“No. I guess we aren’t, are we?” Nicky answered.

“Then, are we friends?” Chris answered.

“I think we just might be.” Nicky answered smiling.

A dazzling smile lights Chris’s face, so genuine and open that you’re taken by surprise.

“That’s good.” Chris answered warmly.

You remember what Judith said about him keeping to himself.

It sounds like Chris doesn’t have many friends. He such a charming guy, I’d have expected him to be popular. But then, I’ve treated my fair share of lovely people who have trouble making friends.

“I’m glad to have you as a friend, then, Nicky.” Chris answered warmly.

“Right back at you.” Nicky answered with a smile.

You give his right hand a squeeze where it rests on his thigh.

“To hear Judith tell it, you make a pretty great one.” Nicky answered.

“Well, even Judith has her blind spots.” Chris answered.

His expression is playful, and yet...

There’s that hint of sadness again.

“...why do you say that?” Nicky answered.

“Hm?”Chris hummed.

“You just said Judith has a blind spot regarding you.” Nicky answered. “ you said it jokingly, but on some level, that’s how you really feel, isn’t it?”

Chris laughs. “Dr. Ransom, are you shrinking me?”

“ I am, aren’t I?” Nicky answered “...sorry, force of habit.”

“No, go ahead.” Chris answered with a smile. “Tell me about yourself.”

“Wait, you want me to whip off a psychological analysis of you?” Nicky answered with shock.

“Why not? Call it morbid curiosity.” Chris answered with a smile.

“Chris, that would be...way too awkward. I know you personally, not as patient.” Nicky answered. “I couldn’t possibly be objective.”

“Oh, come on.. Just for fun.” Chris answered. “Humor me.”

You mull it over for a moment.

“And you swear you’ll take it with a grain of salt?” Nicky answered.

“Cross my heart.” Chris answered.

You sigh, then consider him.

“You need to be in control. Not of other people, but of yourself and whatever situation you’re in.” Nicky answered. “When you aren’t, you find it uncomfortable, which I suspect is why you were so adamant about taking the lead on finding Denise. This is likely informed at least in part by resentment of your medical condition, which you can’t control.”

Chris’s mouth twitches, but he remains silent. You press on.

“You’re incredibly handsome, and you know it, but you spend your nights at a coffeehouse, so I don’t imagine you date much.” Nicky answered.

“Ah...no. I don’t.” Chris answered.

“Chris, do you want me to... stop?, I know you thought this would be fun, but if it’s making you uncomfortable...”Nicky answered.

Chris shakes his head.

“No, you’re fine. Please , go on.” Chris answered.

“You’re friendly-“ Nicky paused.

Chris chuckles.

“Let me finish!” Nicky answered with a smile. “You’re friendly, but you have more acquaintances and business associates than actual friends. And something tells me it’s possible you feel that’s all you deserve.”

An unreadable expression comes over Chris’s face.

However, he quickly exchanges it for a cavalier grin as he parks outside your house.

“I guess you have me all figured out, don’t you?” Chris answered.

He’s deflecting.

“..maybe a little. But there’s a lot more to uncover.” Nicky answered. “You’re a complicated man, Chris Evans. Though I must say, you do wear that sexy air of mystery well.”

“Really?”Chris answered.

He leans in, draping his arm over the back of your seat.

“Do you find me sexy,Dr. Ransom?”Chris answered with a raised brow.

His eyes sparkle with mischief. You remember your dreams, then. Each and every vivid detail. You shift in your seat, your skin suddenly feeling too tight for your body.

“Chris...yes, I think you’re sexy. You have...a certain appeal.” Nicky answered blushing.

“Do I,now?” Chris answered with a grin.

Your breath quickens as he leans closer. Your eyes drop to his lips. You redirect your gaze, but not quickly enough.

“Nicky...”Chris answered.

He runs his knuckles along your jaw.

“Chris...” Nicky answered blushing.

You part your lips, your eyes fluttering shut as he closes the distance between you...just as a car alarm wails, scaring you half to death. You spring away from Chris , who looks flustered as you feel.

“I, um. I should get inside.” Nicky answered blushing.

“Right. Of course.” Chris answered.

“Chris..I’m glad you helped me.” Nicky answered.

“I’m glad I could be of help,Nicky.” Chris answered.

You thank him for the ride and shoot out of the car, practically sprinting into the house.

Once inside, you fall back against the door, your cheeks blazing.

Yeah. This is going to be SUPER inconvenient.

You shake your head and walk into your home office.

All right, Nicky. Get it together. Your first patient will be here in an hour. Thankfully, that’s plenty of time to get a cold shower in...

When Judith calls at the end of your workday, it’s a welcome distraction.

“Judith! How’s Denise?” Nicky answered .

“Perking back up by the minute.” Judith answers. “She ate an entire pizza an hour ago! Now she’s sleeping it off.”

Tears of relief prickle behind your eyes.

My sister stopped eating..before she died. But Denise... Denise is going to be okay.

“Judith, you’re seriously my hero.” Nicky answered.

“Oh, I don’t know about all that, honey.” Judith answered.” I am glad she gave me your number, though. The Dreamseekers Foundation’s annual Halloween ball is right around the corner, and I’d love you to attend.”

“Oh! I’ve never been to a masquerade ball before, but I’d love to...get all dressed up. I never do anything fun on Halloween any,ore. A masquerade sounds amazing.” Nicky answered.

“Oh, it is. It’s spectacular every year.” Judith answers. “And it’ll be a perfect opportunity for you and Chris to spend more time together.”

Your pulse quickens.

Down, girl.

“He’ll be there?” Nicky answered.

“Oh, of course. He’s on the board, and he’s a trustee.” Judith answers. “And I know he’d just love to see you there.”

She gets your mailing address for the formal invitation, and you say goodbyes.

Apparently, I’m going to a ball.

Tags: @denisemarieangelina @joannaliceevans-fanficblog @daliaevans @pine-fresh-kirk @patzammit @shellbilee @wintrcaptn @thatgirly81 @thatsxamericasxass @americasass91 @amazon-x @kailyndavillier @katiew1973 @shellbilee @shotsbyshae @shortacouplebuckys @what-is-your-plan-today @whiskey-cokenfanfic @captain-rogers-beard @captainevans @captainchrisstan @captainchrisfics @nbarnes @shadowcatsworld @littlefiercequeen @nomadevans82 @star-spangled-beard-burn @tropicalcap @trottae17 @et-lesailes @jtargaryen18 @mizcaptainphoenix @deidrashouseofpain @denissjmaddox @comebackandhauntme21 @norcula @ohmy-captain @jms358 @brilliantkey @bellaireland1981 @kelbabyblue @chris-butt @kirstie-evans-writes @branflakes82 @trishevans @stephanysgzz @my-favorite-fics-and-imagines @oddsnendsfanfics @enigma2112 @twittytelly

Tumblr only let tag 50 people but if you’ve been reading since chapter1 feel free to keep reading on. Thanks 😊 enjoy!

#princeofdreams chrisevansfanfic

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thesunnyshow · 4 years

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Name: Sarah

Writing Blog URL: @dreamsafterhours

Age: 19

Nationality: Korean-Australian

Languages: English, Korean, Conversational Japanese, a tiny bit of French

Star Sign: Taurus

MBTI: ENFP

Favorite color: I’ve heard red suits me well, I also like purple and blue.

Favorite food: Literally everything. I love food.

Favorite movie: Always changes with every movie I watch, but one of my all time favourites is 극한직업 (Extreme Job)

Favorite ice cream flavor: Hokey Pokey/Cookies and Cream

Favorite animal: Tiger

Coffee or tea? What are you ordering?

Matcha frappe!! I prefer sweeter drinks over black coffee

Dream job (whether you have a job or not)

Screen actor/band member/author, something that allows me to manifest my creative fantasies

Go-to karaoke song

Tears - So Chan Whee

If you could have one superpower, what would you choose?

Time manipulation! Ultimately what we are deprived of in the human situation is time, and if I can manipulate the speed at which it goes, or visit different points in my life and beyond, I would be able to fix any regrets I have.

If you could visit a historical era, which would you choose?

Premodern Korea!

If you could restart your life, knowing what you do now, would you?

Yes, definitely. I’d spend more time and effort into my academics and start more hobbies at an earlier age.

Would you rather fight 100 chicken-sized horses or one horse-sized chicken?

A hundred horses, no matter what size, is not ideal. Especially if they want to fight you—I’ll take my chances with one chicken.

If you were a trope in a teen high school movie, what would you have been?

The protag’s childhood best friend, loyal and ready to throw hands at anyone who wrongs them.

Do you believe in aliens/supernatural creatures?

Sure! It seems strange to think that we could be the only intelligent life in the entire universe.

If you could buy anything in the world right now (regardless of price), what would it be?

Idol entertainment companies. No more slave contracts and mistreatment ✌🏻

Fun fact about yourself that not everyone would know?

I’ve never cracked a screen before (touch wood lmao), mostly because I do prefer protective cases over slimmer ones. I’m also part of a Korean traditional percussion and dance club! We put on our own concerts each year but unfortunately this year’s concert had to be cancelled. Corona really said coroNO

What fandom(s) do you write for?

Mostly NCT; I used to write for BTS and EXO back in the day, but I’m ready to leave my writing past in my past!

When did you post your first piece?

2014! I started my fanfic journey on Wattpad.

Do you write fluff/angst/crack/general/smut, combo, etc? Why?

I prefer writing angst over fluff, sometimes crack if my mind comes up with something ridiculous. I’ve never written smut before and I’ve never really thought about it, but who knows? Maybe in the future.

Do you write OCs, X Readers, Ships...etc?

For fics that I post online now, they’re mostly x reader, but with original content or plots that include characters who would have a certain name (i.e. surnames) I tend to establish an OC. I’m not sure readers would engage with an OC as much as they would with an x reader fic, so I tend to prefer x reader.

Why did you start writing on Tumblr?

I love creating universes from my own fantasies, and since kpop groups provide content with concepts and visuals, it’s been so easy to imagine them as characters in an AU. Through writing I can share these little headcanons and scenes with people in the fandom and practise my writing skills at the same time!

What inspires you to write?

Leading on from my previous answer, my imagination runs wild when it comes to character traits and what I think these people would do if they were faced with a certain situation. I discuss these scenarios with my friends a lot, so I’d say the characters themselves and my friends inspire me to manifest these fantasies into words.

What genres/AUs do you enjoy writing the most?

Love me a good old mafia au with that angst factor. The weapons! The loyalty (and sometimes lack thereof)! the relationships! The thrill and the danger! That strange sense of second-hand excitement when we think about disregard for legal systems! Top tier. A close second is Hogwarts AUs. Something about the house dynamics and sorting people into them brings me joy.

What do you hope your readers take away from your work?

When readers consume my work, I hope they are able to take a glimpse of what is going on in my head. I try to use as much description as possible to make it as clear as I can, and ultimately I hope readers can appreciate the wonders of the creative mind. I write a lot of timestamps because I have so many scenes and scenarios in my head that I can’t wait to craft into a full plotline, so I’ll dump all my ideas into a specific timestamp to really get that sense of a “slice of life” style! I hope they explore all the possible worlds we can come up with.

What do you do when you hit a rough spot creatively?

Discuss the topic with my friends. Keep the flow going, get some input from others. Watch some movie scenes or listen to music related to the genre to get into the feels. If it’s still not working, I take a break from it, come back to it with a fresh mind.

What is your favorite work and why? Your most successful?

The fic with the most notes at the moment is my college bf renjun timestamp, and I think I can guess why. The line “sorry, I don’t date people who pay me” was one that I came up with for Renjun from the get-go, I couldn’t see anyone saying it better than him. My favourite? I’ll have to get back to you guys on that one. I’ve never been completely satisfied with anything I write, and I think I can do better — but the ones I have the most fun writing are my mafia AUs.

Who is your favorite person to write about?

I prefer to write about people who I see in a variety of different situations, i.e. is very versatile as a character and suits any genre. In that aspect I love writing about Haechan — much like him as a performer and able to understand and pull off any musical concept, I’ve never failed to see him in any scenario with a range of different personalities. He’d make an amazing actor if he wanted to, and if I was a casting director, I’d love to cast him.

Do you think there’s a difference between writing fanfiction vs. completely original prose?

No. Not a major one, anyway. The original piece I’ve been working on for the past 2+ years is completely original and yet I’ve set a few of the characters’ faceclaims as NCT members, purely because they fit the image of what I believe my characters would look like (for example, Jeno is the faceclaim for the prince — tell me he doesn’t give off royal vibes and I’ll laugh). This doesn’t necessarily mean I’m writing fanfiction. The prince’s name isn’t Jeno. I don’t include Jeno’s notable characteristics as a person. My writing style remains consistent throughout all my works — fanfic or original — the only thing that separates the two, in my opinion, is whether or not the author draws from the celebrity as a person (i.e. using their name, perhaps their relationships with others, etc.) and ultimately feature that celeb as a character in their story.

What do you think makes a good story?

In two words, plausibility and consistency. I don’t refer to the creative aspect of writing — go wild with imagination. Break boundaries, invent new things. By plausible I mean whether or not the choices the characters make are understandable in their respective settings. Sure, characters can do stupid things and make mistakes, sure, plot twists can occur — but can we as readers see why the characters made those silly mistakes? were they forced errors? perhaps immaturity? Are the plot twists in order with the situation and its possibilities? Is there a sound explanation behind why these choices are made? If we can’t see and understand why certain plot points happen, it loses credibility and I tend to have difficulty seeing it in my head. Also, I tend to take punctuation and grammar extremely seriously. I’m that friend who calls out grammar mistakes and repeats typos, and in my own opinion, it definitely affects the reading experience. The flow of language is definitely mediated by such mechanisms, and if those aren’t there, I tend to wonder how much I’d love it if the grammar and spelling were correct.

What is your writing process like?

A lot of the time, I’ll think of a random scenario, maybe act it out myself. Experiment with dialogue, visualise the scene in my head. Jot down a few notes, some good lines that I can come up with. Then I imagine who would fit the scenario best, taking into consideration the characteristics and dynamics I want in the scene. I’ll write out the scene in dot points, and then write it into paragraphs.

Would you ever repurpose a fic into a completely original story?

I’ve never thought about fic to original story, but I have thought about repurposing an original story to a fic! ‘Casting’ idols as my characters is always fun, I get to experiment with character traits and through this I can understand my characters better. Casting idols also gives me a clear visual representation of my characters, too! So far, I haven’t repurposed a fic into an original story, since a lot of my work isn’t part of a fixed plot. That being said, I imagine it would be fun!

What tropes do you love, and what tropes can’t you stand?

I love a good old enemies-to-lovers/enemies-to-friends trope — the initial dynamics, the turning point, the character development, the progressive trust towards each other, new loyalties, the compromises, learning to see the good in anyone — and it goes with any every genre. So versatile! I love it. A trope I can’t stand, though? Cheating/adultery. Oof. Goes against my morals.

How much would you say audience feedback/engagement means to you?

It means a lot more than readers might think. I value all kinds of feedback, whether it be good feedback or constructive criticism. It allows me to see what readers liked and didn’t like, and I can shape my writing into better form with reference. It also motivates me a lot! A retweet with a simple comment in the tags will literally make my entire day.

What has been one of the biggest factors of your success (of any size)?

Based on my top posts, I think the main factor that engaged readers was that they could also see the people act that way in that scene. I try my best to keep my characters realistic in that their on-screen images and personas align with how they would react to situations in my writing, keeping character dynamics and relationships as consistent as the plot sees fit. Instead of writing an idol into a plot for the sake of writing about them, I tend to plan out the scene and then evaluate which person would be best suited to that character.

Do you think fanfic writers get unfairly judged?

Yes, we can be. i recently read this thread and it got me thinking about the foundations of fanfic and why we write it, but then as part of that group, I can’t help but think that the genre of fanfic itself just has a bad rep of being shitty Wattpad writing with no punctuation and cheesy plotlines littered with overused cliches by 13 year olds thirsting over grown men. The fanfic world that I know, however, consists of many truly amazing authors who borrow the names and characteristics of public figures to realise their creative ideas to the point where they’re not just authors anymore — they’re artists of language. Curators of words. Some of the best writing I’ve read is through fanfic, and again — the reason why fanfic is fanfic is because the characters are based on people in real life. We share these stories amongst ourselves to imagine things outside our reality, and we consume these stories because we have our support for our artists in common. This is our method of escape. It’s not much different from daydreaming about our high school crushes. They’re just beautifully written and feature people who are part of an industry that relies on public recognition, public appreciation and public support to survive. If you think writing should strictly involve purely original characters born from the author’s own imagination with no inspiration from real live people and thus fanfic is “weird”, “creepy” and “dehumanising”, then I’ll guess you’ve never made art before, nor can you properly appreciate it.

Do you think art can be a medium for change?

I think that it can inspire and reflect change, but I find it hard to see if art can be change itself. We are the only ones capable of change — art is the medium of inspiration and emotional expression. We can create art and use it as a method to raise awareness and encourage people to take action, but we can’t exactly throw paintings at the white house and expect police reform, can we?

Do you ever feel there are times when you’re writing for others, rather than yourself?

Yes, definitely. There was many a time I discussed plotlines with my friends and they’d said, “you hAVE to write this I NEED to read it”, or “where’s chapter 3?” and while I know they only mean well and only aim to encourage and support me, it can definitely backfire against their intentions and make writing feel like a chore or rush me into writing when I’m not fully inspired. Forced art is not the best, and whenever I do post something under that kind of mindset, I tend to be less satisfied with it and end up hating it.

Do you ever feel like people have misunderstood you or your writing at times?

Though i worry about it, I don’t think there’s ever been an instance where it’s happened. I hope it never does, either!

Do your offline friends/loved ones know you write for Tumblr?

Yes! I don’t mind, seeing that a lot of my friends are also kpop fans who also stan NCT. I link my writing to them when I post, and they support me a lot! It’s not the first thing I tell people when I first meet them, of course — I would only tell a non kpop fan that I write fanfic if I knew they wouldn’t judge.

What is one thing you wish you could tell your followers?

Myself and other authors always, always always appreciate any form of feedback! Laughed at a funny line? Cried because of another? Felt the pain the character was feeling? Tell us! Have a comment on the writing style, or noticed a certain characteristic in our prose? Let us know that you noticed it! Absolutely dying for the next chapter and can’t wait to see what happens next? Express! (but don’t impose!) have a favourite line or completely agree that they’d totally say/do that? Point it out and gush about it! it’s hard to imagine the warm feeling it gives us as creators when receiving feedback until you actually get it! Go ahead, add an extra line in the tags, send in an ask. Make someone’s day. You’re never going to be thought of as weird or annoying. If it makes you feel something, express it (even in keyboard smash! we may not be able to read it, but we will feel it with you :D)!

Do you have any advice for aspiring writers who might be too scared to put themselves out there?

If it makes you feel better, my writing when I started out on Wattpad was mega cringe worthy and still kept getting reads and votes and comments. Before I deleted my account, I read through it again and wondered how people can have such low standards when it comes to fanfic. Now, if there’s anything I want to tell you, it’s this — writing should be for yourself. It should be your personal hobby that you invest your own time and effort into, and it’s completely up to you whether you want to share your writing or not. It’s not a requirement. You don’t have to have published works to call yourself a writer. It doesn’t have to be amazing with flowing prose with immaculate worldbuilding with above-average vocabulary. Writing should be your catharsis, your personal medium by which you express your creativity. That should never be measured by likes and reblogs, nor should it come with an obsession over getting engagements.

Are there any times when you regret joining Tumblr?

Despite the advice that I give to people and my previous answers saying that you shouldn’t be writing for others, a good portion of my motivation comes from reader feedback and engagements I get with my work, which is the reason why I applied to be part of writing networks within the fandom (for more exposure to a wider audience). As much as I don’t want to admit it, the amount of engagements I get will affect my satisfaction with the work. Some works I posted that I personally really liked didn’t get nearly as many notes as I was hoping, and then I can’t help but feel a little disappointed. In that sense, I’m still glad I get to share my writing on Tumblr — but the side effects of it affect me a little more than they probably should.

Do you have any mutuals who have been particularly formative/supportive in your Tumblr journey?

I’ve only posted NCT fics on tumblr for a short while (maybe a month?) and so I don’t have many mutuals, but the few I have gotten into contact with are all lovely and always willing to rant about anything, despite most of them being in different timezones!

Pick a quote to end your interview with:

“Writing is a form of therapy; sometimes I wonder how all those who do not write, compose or paint can manage to escape the madness, the melancholia, the panic fear which is inherent in the human situation.” — Graham Greene, Ways of Escape (1980)

BONUS: K-POP CONFIDENTIAL

Interested in your very own episode of The Sunny Show? Find out how to apply here.

#@dreamsafterhours #thesunnyshow #featuredauthor #episode11 #nct

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selenaquintanillaperez · 4 years

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It’s been nearly 25 years since the death of Selena Quintanilla-Pérez, but the memory of the Grammy-winning, Mexican American singer is pervasive in popular culture. Musicians of all genres — from Bruno Mars to Kacey Musgraves — cover her songs. Companies have released Selena makeup and clothing collections. This year, Netflix is releasing a much-anticipated series about her life.

Quintanilla was known as the Queen of Tejano music. Tejano refers to the blend of sounds and cultures along the Mexico and Texas border. It's a generally male-dominated musical genre and mixes traditional music from Mexico with sounds from the US Southwest.

This spring, San Diego State University is offering a first-ever class exploring historical and modern Latinx media representation through Quintanilla’s enduring music and legacy.

Nathian Rodriguez, a professor specializing in critical-cultural and digital media studies, created the class, "Selena and Latinx Media Representation," for the university’s journalism and media studies department.

Rodriguez said discussions about Latinx media representation are especially relevant today. Hollywood faces persistent criticism over its inability to be more inclusive. A 2019 report found Latino actors represented only 3% of lead or co-lead roles in movies.

Meanwhile, controversy erupted over the novel “American Dirt,” which critics blasted for its stereotypical or erroneous depictions of Mexican migrants and life in Mexico. The debate highlighted the lack of diversity in the book publishing industry.

“There's so many things about [Selena] that speak to the sociopolitical atmosphere, that speaks to pop culture, that speaks to identity formation, that speaks to the need for Latinx representation across all media platforms,” Rodriguez said. “Selena is that perfect iconic figure that we can use as a lens to be able to investigate the history of Latinx representation in media, its current status and where it's going in the future.”

Rodriguez spoke to The World’s host Marco Werman about how Quintanilla’s music and legacy are helping Latinx students come to terms with their own identity and to think critically about the lack of Latinx representation in the media.

Marco Werman: What effect did Selena have on you and your own understanding of Latinx culture? Were you a fan?

Nathian Rodriguez: I spent a lot of my early childhood in San Antonio, Texas, and I grew up listening to the Tejano radio stations. I was always listening to the radio trying to win stuff. But I grew up in a very patriarchal Mexican household, and I consider myself a son of an immigrant. My grandfather was like my father to me. He was from Mexico and he spoke Spanish. My grandmother spoke Spanish. My mother and her brother spoke Spanish. And growing up, they really wanted me to speak English first so that I would be successful in school. And so because of that, I grew up in a household hearing Spanish all around me. But I spoke English, so I didn't speak Spanish correctly. I was kind of pocho. So, I never really felt like I belonged. I was always in the middle. I wasn’t Mexican enough, American enough.

So, when Selena came along and I was able to hear her sing in Spanish, but speak in English and talk about her own identity and mispronounce words and fumble on some of the Spanish, it really helped me identify with a Latino person that I had never been able to comprehend. This person that was in the middle, that was living a bicultural life. I saw a lot of myself in Selena. She helped me negotiate my Tejano identity, knowing that there wasn't one correct way to be a Latinx individual. That's really how she resonated with me. And growing up, I just kind of always, you know, looked at Selena as a person that was just authentic.

Selena died in 1995. That was 25 years ago. In the years since, have you seen Latinx media representation change?

I think that we're going in a more positive direction. We're also going in a direction where Latinx identities are not monolithic. A lot of times everybody automatically thinks Mexico, but Latinx is so much more than just a country or a nation or a geographic space. So, I see the direction of the current landscape since Selena's passing really starting to encompass this kind of blending of sorts, of different types of sound and people to make what the Latinx representation a lot more intersectional. Now, that doesn't mean that it's portrayed more often. I think it's just the few portrayals that we do have are more intersectional, and we still have a far way to go.

Is there a song by Selena that you feel captures not just who she was, but also what she represented then?

The first one was “Como La Flor,” which was her first No. 1 hit in Mexico, but also in the United States. And I think that really speaks to her ability to cross borders, to cross genres, and also to cross generations that students now, who weren't alive when Selena was alive, are able to remember that song. And it means something to them. The song lyrics also talk about being given something and then it withers away and you're sad about it. I think that also speaks to this Latin mourning of all the different things that are happening in terms of the militarization of the border, in terms of [Deferred Action for Childhood Arrival] students being scared, in terms of children being put into cages. It really speaks to this whole Latinx culture of wanting and belonging and not being able to have it. I think in a more literal way, it also speaks to the fact that we're still mourning Selena, and we're still looking for, you know, those positive Latinx role models that transcend barriers and genres and generations. We're still searching for that. So, I think of all the songs that students bring, “Como La Flor” speaks to that.

Students also bring up “Amor Prohibido.” The lyrics talk about how society doesn't want certain people to be together, parents don’t want them to be together. I think people can internalize that and transfer that to maybe being of two different religions, different political ideologies, to people who are also part of the LGBTQ community.

And then the third one is “Tu Solo Tu,” which is a very traditional mariachi song. It's a cover, it’s not a Selena original. She was able to give a new Tejano, modern mainstream pop culture sound to a traditional mariachi song. And I think that's what made her so popular with Mexicans in Mexico. Because they heard a song that was familiar to them, but it had a very new take on it.

What do you hope students take away from your course? Like what do you want them to do with this knowledge?

The first and foremost goal is that I want people to be able to identify with Latinx culture in the mediated landscape, to be more critical in terms of media consumption and be more media literate. For media and journalism students, specifically those who are going out into the world to create media, create advertisements and work in film, television and music, I hope that they become not just critical consumers, but also critical producers, knowing that there are multiple ways in which you can depict Latinx individuals in positive, nuanced ways, not stereotypical, monolithic ways.

I want to give students a sense that they can go out there and do this, that just because they don't see themselves represented in the media, that they can take control and make those representations, whether its starting at a low level with podcasts and YouTube videos to becoming a Gregory Nava and making films.

#article #selena #selena quintanilla #selena quintanilla perez

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internethistoriananalysis · 3 years

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Habermas’ Public Sphere and its Transformation in Relation to YouTube

The Public Sphere

German philosopher and devotee of liberalism, Jurgen Habermas conceptualised the ‘bourgeois public sphere’ through his historical analysis; arising from the establishment of a new liberal social order starting in the coffee houses of England in the early 18th-century before spreading across Europe to countries like Germany and France; necessitated by the increased trade which upped the need for more open discussion of matters of common concern (Habermas, 1989). He defines the bourgeois public sphere as “[being] conceived above all as the sphere of private people come together as a public; they soon claimed the public sphere regulated from above against the public authorities themselves, to engage them in a debate over the general rules governing relations in the basically privatized but publicly relevant sphere of commodity exchange and social labour” (Habermas, 1989:27).

Habermas’ theory of the public sphere is ingrained into the late-stage enlightenment philosophy of liberalism and its values. As such, Habermas defines a set of prerequisites that must be met in order for a space to be categorical of a public sphere. The space must be accessible to and inclusive of all citizens; there must be allowances for the formation of public opinion within a debated framework of rules and governing regulations wherein unrestricted debate may take place in accordance with the ideals of free association and expression (Habermas, 1989).

Transformation of the Public Sphere

YouTube, as a place that anyone can go, and a tool that anyone can use; could easily be called a ‘public sphere’. The question lays in if the prevalence of the digital era constitutes a transformational change for the public sphere as a whole.

Habermas argues that the ‘public sphere’ that came into existence in the 1830′s due to the advent of increased trade was a very open, rational, and freethinking arena. The relationships in this public sphere were horizontal, not vertical. In essence, this means that people interacted with people of a similar class or socioeconomic status to themselves, rather than any action between classes occurring (Habermas, 1989). The public sphere during this time was structurally classist in this regard, something that would persist later on, but for different reasons with the emergence of the corporatism of the 20th century, and the formation of the welfare state.

In the in the 20th century, classical liberalism sacrificed itself to avoid Marxism through the creation of the welfare state. Paralleling this was the merger of many large companies into corporations, particularly in the publishing and media industries where the narrative was thereon controlled by the stage-managed narratives of corporations that operate(d) on curated content that was unilaterally incentivised by a profit-motive sought to promote the interests of advertisers: other faceless corporate entities. According to Habermas this re-established the vertical nature of the public sphere seen in feudal times, as it was analogical to the nature of King talking to Subject. Instead in the modern era, the ‘King’ became the Media Corporation and the ‘Subject’; the Consumer.

Old versus New Media

YouTube, in some regard is similar to the traditional media organisation, yet on the same hand is also radically dissimilar. I would argue that the similarities are less prevalent, and that the differences are so radical in their nature that they outweigh any similarity between traditional media; it’s conventions, and itself by an order of magnitude.

One of the most notable similarities between these two ‘institutions’, for lack of a better term, is both YouTube and the traditional media are controlled by corporate entities. In the case of the former; Google. This means that YouTube is still controlled by the same kind of institution as the traditional media. It can be succinctly argued that this control has had a significant impact over the platforms evolution over the years. For example, there has been a marked shift from the platform promoting itself as a platform of independent creators, to a more traditional stage managed one, where the platform can be controlled. “YouTube is inevitably heading towards being like television, but they never told their creators this,” remarks Jamie Cohen a professor of new media at Molloy College speaking to USA Today in 2018 (Alexander, 2019).

It is undeniable that YouTube has fundamentally changed people’s expectations of media and the way in which they consume it. There is no doubt about the fact that traditional media is on the decline, especially in the certain antiquated domains such as the newspaper industry. CVM for newspapers; books and stationery has gone down from over £2.2bn in Q3 2000 versus £569mn today, Q3 2020 (Ruddock, 2020:Online).

So, has the Public Sphere been Transformed?

As I have explained above, it seems clear that the public sphere has been fundamentally transformed as the old corporate-controlled narratives of the past have subsisted in favour of independent rational thought and reasoning by a decentralised network of content creators on platforms such as YouTube and Twitter due to the lack of ‘stage management’. This would imply that the vertical relationships as described by Habermas have ceased to be. Unfortunately, this is not the case.

Targeted advertisement based on people’s personal data is now a societal norm. Curated content is so too, with the YouTube algorithm personalising content based on one’s viewing history. It has also been described as “one of the most powerful radicalizing instruments of the 21st century” (Tufekci, 2018). These divisive algorithms seek to divide society through further polarization of political thought. It is hard to see how this could improve the quality of the public sphere.

I mentioned above, when describing the similarities that YouTube was purchased by Google. What was ‘Google’ is now known as the parent company ‘Alphabet Inc.’ This is not a new behaviour, as media corporations did the same kind of mergers and buyouts in the 20th century when forming what became the corporate media that is now in decline, it is certain that the similar narratives are being promoted if the logic is Habermas is correct, except in different ways. Possible examples include incentivising self-censorship through revocation of monetization from videos when certain unfavourable key words are detected; algorithmic discrimination, and termination of accounts. The above explained algorithmic polarization often lead to amplified censorship within communities that are politically biased (Ashokkumar, et al. 2020).

Compared to the 19th century coffee houses of London, a place of free and rational debate. The public sphere in the digital era seems like a stone’s throw away from societal breakdown. The main driving force is algorithmic technology which has arisen from the profit-motives of large corporations such as Google, Facebook, Twitter and others. It is safe to say that the public sphere has been transformed, but it is difficult to argue that it has been transformed for the better.

References

Ashokkumar, A., Talaifar, S., Fraser, W. T., Landabur, R., Buhrmester M., Gomez, A., Borja, P., Swann, Jr., W., B. (2020) ‘Censoring political opposition online: Who does it and why’ J Exp Soc Psychol. 91(104031) DOI; 10.1016/j.jesp.2020.104031

Alexander, J. (2019) The Golden Age of YouTube is Over. The Verge. [Online] [Accessed 4th January 2021] https://www.theverge.com/2019/4/5/18287318/youtube-logan-paul-pewdiepie-demonetization-adpocalypse-premium-influencers-creators#:~:text=The%20attention%20Kjellberg%20brought%20to,from%20halting%20their%20ad%20spending.

Habermas, J. (1989) The structural transformation of the public sphere : an inquiry into a category of bourgeois society. Cambridge: MIT Press

Ruddock, V. Office for National Statistics (2020) 09.5.2 Newspapers; books & stationery Newspapers & periodicals CVM NAYear NSA £m. Newport: Office for National Statistics.

Tufekci, Z. (2018) YouTube, the Great Radicalizer. New York Times. [Online] [Accessed 4th January 2021]

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