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bluebellhairpin · 3 years

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( Notice: OKAY - The pic there says ‘The Hobbit/LOTR’ but for times sake, and my own sanity, there is none listed thus-far (same goes for the ‘other’ category’). Merci for understanding! )

So I’ve been meaning to do this for a while, and I already have a blog for it ( @nemosrepost ) but that doesn’t get too much attention. Thus, here we are!

(This was a nightmare to get done - it took weeks to get all the links and pics done up in my spare time - I hope you appreciate that.)

They’re all sorts here, from Medieval Marvel AU’S, to Modern Attack on Titan one shots. They’re all organised via fandom, and I’ve tried my best to link and tag everything properly, but that is a difficult feat, so beware - for some it may not have worked too well.

Like my *actual* masterlist, this will be updated regularly with new fic recs, and even new characters and fandoms as I read them. All fic’s currently listed (as of November 26, 2020) are found on my reblog account.

I’ve also tried to add in a ‘recommendation summary’ thing of each - so basically just my thoughts on the fic(s). But anyway, have fun browsing, and overall - enjoy!

(AND also - LMAOOOO - Have fun scrolling lololololol!) - Nemo

( Pre - Warning: I am not tagging anything as NSWF, 18+, or triggering content. However some fics listed do contain such material. Please refer to the warnings or Authors Notes on each Fic before reading. Stay safe guys! I love you! )

Bluebellhairpin’s Masterlist

Bucky Barnes

Knight in Rusty Armour - Medieval / A/B/O AU! Series - by @revengingbarnes Honestly I binged the first eight chapters (+ prologue) in close to one sitting. That was mostly because that was all that was published at the time. It is completed now. I love both these AU’s, and I love Bucky - win, win!

Flowers Bloom - Soulmate AU! Series - by revengingbarnes Another great series, and honestly I’m a slut for soulmate au’s, so this author might be coming after my heart - keep up that good work, if you know what I mean.

The Great Build Up - Modern / Firefighter Au! One Shot - by @thottybarnes This ones goes from cute, to hot and steamy, to angsty, and back to cute again. A one shot rollercoaster, and I thoroughly enjoyed every word of it.

Maybe This Time - Mob Au! One Shot - by @propertyofpoeandbucky Okay, so if there’s one thing I like more than an mobster au, it’s adding children into the mix. Something about big bad guys going all soft for this tiny human - and then making them - and that’s called perfection.

Whatever It Takes - Biker AU! One Shot - by @sgtjbuccky He like’s to be loud, so what. He rides a bike, so what. I what to ride him and his bike, so what.

(Un-Named) - One Shot - by @softlybarnes I’ve never liked Bucky’s metal arm more in my entire life. Using it for a baby going through teething? A+ idea.

Hero, Waiting - Medieval AU! One Shot - by captain-ariel-barnes Sadly, this fic is unavailable now, and that - obviously - makes me sad. But I’m adding it her anyway because of how much I adored it. The love triangle between Bucky, Reader, and Steve was amazing, and the feelings? Phenomenal.

Steve Rogers

If Walls Could Talk - One Shot - by propertyofpoeandbucky I’ll recreate my original comment on this fic - ‘Ouch’. And that’s all I have to say about that.

The End of the War - College AU! One Shot - by @redgillan There’s nothing quite like a enemies to lovers trope that’s well-written. But then throw in fight club, a jerk date, ice-cream and pizza - just read it. You’ll understand then.

The Edge of the Water - Mermaid AU! Series - @floatingpetals I have to admit now, I haven’t read all of this yet. But I also have to say, what I have read was fantastic. Mermaids - and Mermen - they just hit different, you know?

Pseudo Princess - Medieval AU! Series - by @shreddedparchment To date, it’s one of the best fics - nay - stories I’ve ever read. I’d dare to say it’s easily the length of a novel, so if you’re up for the long haul, I’d definitely recommend it. It’s worth the wait - trust me. Op obviously put a hella lot of work into it, and it shows.

Loki Laufeyson

Loki’s Happy Ending - Series (?) - by @gingerwritess Listen, I have been and forever will be a Loki girl. Nothing will change that. And every scrap of content Theo produces for Loki I will cradle in my palms and keep warm until they’re ready to go out into the world or whatever - point is, read this.

Just One Quick Glance - One Shot - by @imagines-trashcan After watching ‘Endgame’, and squealing at every moment Loki appeared on screen, only to not have him show up in the final battle - this was one of my comfort fics.

thunderstorms. - One Shot - by @tarynkauai Naturally, Loki’s child would inherit his unease of thunderstorms. And naturally, seeing Loki as a dad makes me happy.

Stitches - One Shot - by @lokibug Loki being nice. I like that. We stan.

Quentin Beck

The Curveball - One Shot - by @healingchurch Listen, this is on here for a reason. I didn’t really like Mysterio ‘cause of what he did to Peter, but hey, some people are good actors, and some write characters acting very well.

Stephen Strange

(Un-Named) - Imagine / One Shot - by @archieimagines A cocky bastard and a shy Reader, as far as I’m concerned that a one-way ticket straight to my heart. *wink wonk*.

(Un-Named) - One Shot - by @whirlybirbs Honestly, there are multiple fics of hers on this list, and that’s because she’s a damn fine writer, and her stories are just that addictive. This one is no different. I was preparing to read more and then it ended. But all good things, right?

Crash and Burn - One Shot - by @lilyswritings The angst, and the angst. I cry, you cry, everyone cries. Unfortunately there is only the one part, but much to my personal joy that means I can interpret the after-ending however I want!

Frank Castle

(Un-Named) - One Shot - by @alexsunmners This is just cute okay? I have no other words except this was plain and simply very, very, very nice to read, and that it makes me feel very soft right here on the inside.

Peter Parker

Super Smooth Genius - One Shot (?) - by whirlybirbs Back at it again with the cute, awkward, friendly, neighbourhood, Peter Parker.

Just Don’t - Soulmate AU! One Shot - by @papel-creativo What’d I tell you about soulmate au’s? I can’t resist them. And of course Pete being a caring bf with his hero s/o. So nice.

Ronan the Accuser

Make You Proud - One Shot - by @kayleighhalliday2203 This is justifiable because I was going through a Lee Pace faze and I found it and loved it immediately.

Ultron

(Un-Named) - One Shot / Series - by @snarky-badger This I can also justify having read, because (and if you know me then you know) the robot thing ... Doesn’t bother me as much as it should. And I binged all of it on ao3, so.

Poe Dameron

(Un-Named) - Masterlist - by propertyofpoeandbucky Okay, I know there’s a lot on this list, and it could take you a while to get through it all, but trust me - it’s worth it. Lani likes Poe, and it shows. He’s written so well.

Dashing - One Shot / Series ? - by whirlybirbs Birbs does it again. She’s got Punchy!Reader, and if there were a legal way to get all of this Poe thing down into a written book, I’d do it.

You Can See Me? - Modern / Ghost AU! One Shot - by @tintinwrites I just this this one’s really cool. And what Poe does for the reader at the end? So sweet! He would totally do that!

Across the Hall - Modern / Nurse AU! Series - by @starryeyedstories It’s cute, it’s fun, it’s got tension, and a little drama - plus a smidge of angst and Corgi!BB-8. If perfection were ever made into a Modern/Nurse au Poe fic - this would be it.

Deepest, Lightest Secrets - One Shot - by @writefightandflightclub It’s got the humour and overall feel you’d expect to come from something Star Wars related - honestly I had so much fun reading it, and I’ll happily do it again.

Levi Ackerman

Names for Him & You - One Shot - by @commanderserwin Again, op is one of my main sources for fic’s in this area - so there could be quite a few of them listed here. But this one? Cute as heck.

Levi’s Secret - Modern AU! One Shot - by @theamberwriter This one was damn funny in my opinion. Nothing can ever be hidden from Hange for long.

You Look So Beautiful In White - Modern AU! One Shot - by @alrightberries This fic, it carved out my heart, diced it, shoved it in a blender, then made it into an atomic bomb. I - I was not okay. That amount of angst shouldn’t be allowed. Read it.

Abeille - Modern / Mafia AU! Series - by @ackermans-freedom-inc Honestly, this isn’t finished yet but, honestly, I’m not ready for it to finish. The heartache. The betrayal. The child. I can’t even.

Lights - Modern AU! One Shot - by commanderserwin This was the first fic I ever read of op’s, and I couldn’t believe what I read so I went back and read it again. I can’t tell you how much I love it, or how I feel about it, so just go read for yourself and you’ll know.

To Build a Home - Modern AU! Series - by @vennilavee If you’re a fan of Levi, you must go read this. It’s so detailed, and just so perfect - whenever a new part comes out I have a quick reboot before going to read it.

Erwin Smith

One of Us - Modern AU! Miniseries - by commanderserwin I’m not going to lie, this one is here because I requested it, but also because I really liked it, and cried while reading it. So there.

Reiner Braun

Service to the Crown - Medieval AU! Miniseries - by @present-mel It should probably be illegal to write Reiner or Medieval au’s this well, and yet here op is writing both. Like, McScuse me, where do you acquire such talent and can I have some?

Toshinori Yagi

Flirting with All Might - One Shot - by @lemonlordleah-shinzawa-kitten Toshi. The great. The hero. The awkward. He’s a blond boy doing what blond boys do even if he’s a little older he’s still part of the crew.

Stitches - Villain AU / Mini Series - by @itsallmightbitch Okay, so I said above that I wouldn’t put warnings on these - but this time I have to. Nothing I’ve read in my whole life emmits such an amount of pure horniness - and I love it.

Godless - Fantasy AU / One Shot - by @pleasantanathema Another ‘All Smite’ fic, yes, I know. But god. They’re so good. This one is another real horny one, so if you can’t tell there is a slight theme running here. And - sksksksks - this is actually from the same ‘general area’ as the Reiner fic listed above (Service to the Crown). There was a event. I read everything.

Keigo Takami

Preening - One Shot - by @shoutaaizawas Literally the softest and cutest damned thing I’ve read for Keigo. No, I’m not just ‘saying’ that, it’s genuine. The feelings I get - or lack thereof due to them turning to mush - it too much for words. Honest.

Seasonal Special - One Shot - by @keiqos I’ll say this now and I’ll say it first - any Hawks fics written by op are *chefs kiss*. They’re amazing. Secondly, rut!Hawks is my weakness - this fic is one of such weaknesses.

Shouto Aizawa

(Un-Named) - Series - by @theamberwriter This is *technically* the second part in the series, but it’s the only part I’ve read and goddamnit, I’m in love. Hubby Aizawa. The disappearing Baby-Zawa.

I Miss You Texts - SMAU - Kuroo Tetsurou, Bokuto Koutarou, Nishinoya Yuu - by @briswriting I miss them too. They ain’t dead. I just feel like I haven’t seen them in so long.

Little Things - Headcanons - Karasuno - by @haikyuudreaming Every single one makes me feel so nostalgic, and I feel so much longing. I love. I loose. I pine. I want. And yet I cannot have. I only dream.

Cheerleader - Headcanons - Karasuno - by @imagine-101 I want to be their cheerleader. Now I am able to be. Op, many thanks for the feeding.

Tsukishima Kei

Cherry Wine - Single Parent AU! Series - by @bakugou-jpg I’m gonna head out and say that Tsukki was my first favourite Haikyuu character - then I ‘character developed’ but that only went so far as to give me more favorites. But deadass - read this and you won't regret it.

Ukai Keishin

(Un-Named) - Ballroom/Latin Dancer AU! Headcanons - by @imagine-that-haikyuu I know nothing about dancing. Or ballroom dancing. But I do know I’d love to dance with Ukai. So how’s that for ‘middle ground’?

#fic rec #masterlist #marvel x reader #bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers x reader #loki laufeyson x reader #quentin beck x reader #stephen strange x reader #frank castle x reader #peter parker x reader #ronan x reader #ultron x reader #poe dameron x reader #levi ackerman x reader #erwin smith x reader #reiner braun x reader #karasuno x reader #tsukishima kei x reader #ukai keishin x reader

309 notes · View notes

be-ready-when-i-say-go · 4 years

Note

Thought about something cute like reader and 5sos singing on the same festival and she’s dating cal 😭 and they switch with her guitarist and drummer boy and at first she didn’t notice but they they start to have so much fun together at the stage dancing together and doing stupid shit them following her around as she tries to prevent herself from giggling too much and actually singing 🥺🥺 and later she walks down when 5sos are performing with crystal Kay and Sierra omg 😳

+ I’m sorry I’m annoying but part two to my last asks!! I just imagine calum being all heart eyes for her minding his own business tho playing his guitar but every time he doesn’t have to use vocals or his bass he caught her hand or keep her close and ahh singing wildflower to her!!’ When at first the girls just wanted to have fun on stage with them but Calum just keeps her close the whole time singing to her and her singing back with him and being all funny and giggly together ooof

Thanks for your suggestion! It took me a minute to get to it. I did combine it with a few other suggestions. One person asked for drama and someone asked for angst. And viola! Here it is.

This is the last part of the Distance series! I’ll do an epilogue if folks want to send in some suggestions for it! HUGE thanks to everyone that sent me ideas! This series wouldn’t be what is it without you guys!

Find the Distance series masterlist here! Here’s my main masterlist! CW: 18+ (Smut). Angst. Lots of Fluff.

Songs I played: Woman and From The Dining Table by Harry Styles!

Here it is at a WHOOPINg 9.6k. Enjoy!

_____________________________________________________________

The release of her album is followed by a tour. At first, she’s excited. Her mind runs wild with possibilities. Her fingers can’t keep up fast enough with every wonder and question she sends to Calum and thankfully, he doesn’t seem to mind the incessant buzzing. He takes each question in stride. It’s nice, in a way, for him to have the wisdom to give her. Like she doesn’t have to go in blind like he did, especially since it’s just her. He hopes he can make her feel a little less alone on the road. It can be a hard road to travel alone.

The glimmer starts to wear off fast. Rehearsals turn her into a zombie. She’s up fairly early stretching, taking her dog for a walk, trying to remind herself that everything’s going to fall into place like it needs to, but the second she walks into the rehearsal space it feels like everything is going to fall apart. That somehow everything she’s ever wanted on tour is just too much, too much out of the budget, too much because she doesn’t have the weight to her name just yet. And maybe it’s a lot of glitz and glamour. Maybe she is asking for too much. Maybe that would be her downfall.

Her phone buzzes. And she pauses, sitting on the floor with her mic in hand, and glances over to it. It’s Calum again. Another message that she won’t actually read until some ungodly hour in the night. He’s got to be up to his throat in worry. She can’t seem to think enough to text him back during the day. Too much is going on. She feels like she’s going to sink, just through the carpeted floor and through the concrete foundation and bury herself into the dirt. Maybe that would be a better fate for her.

She turns her attention back to her notebook, with the crude drawing she made when she was trying to set the stage. “Let’s just,” she sighs. “Let’s start from scratch.”

And it works. Though it’s long and arduous, she’s able to figure out how to set the stage, finalizing the neon design. There’s a rough draft at the video that will be playing behind her for a wardrobe change. By the time she’s able to crawl into her sheets, it’s nearly 1 am. There’s barely enough energy to keep her eyes open to send Calum an apology text. When she wakes, she grins at her dog waiting patiently at the side of her bed. “Ready to go, bubs?”

They give a tiny whine and rest their snout on the covers. She laughs, “Yeah, you’re ready to go.” She manages to brush her teeth and slips into a change of clothes before going out for a run.

Between showering and getting dressed, she checks her messages. Happy to hear that you got things straightened, baby. Reach out whenever you get a breather, reads the text from Calum.

She responds with a good morning text and then switches over to her email. At the top is an email with ‘urgent’ in the subject. She’s praying it’s not more bad news. She doesn’t quite have the heart to withstand more bad news after the progress they made yesterday. It’s details about a festival date in LA. That perfectly lines between her break between the European leg of the tour and the North America dates. She doesn’t even think twice about agreeing to the festival show.

Right as her day winds down, from a shockingly smooth day of rehearsals, Calum calls her. And though she’s drenched in sweat from the light choreography and running it for hours, she stops and answers. “Hey, baby.”

“Oh, she lives!”

“I know, I know. Sorry.”

“Only kidding. I know you’re hard at work. It’s just really good to hear your voice. How are rehearsals?”

“Really good now. Once we got over the hump, it’s like smooth sailing.”

“Good, I’m glad. I was calling. We got word a couple days ago about a festival show right when you’re on break between legs. And I was hoping you had some free time, just to hang out.”

She can’t contain the smile, leaning her head against the window. The evening twilight has already settled outside. “I’m joining that festival too. And we’ll be hanging out in LA for a few days for rehearsals and then shipping out. So absolutely, we can hang out. I miss your face. And Duke. God, I miss Duke.”

He laughs. Of course she emphasizes her longing for his dog over him. But he wouldn’t have it any other way. “I really can’t wait to see you.” It falls from his lips in a whisper, a secret between the two of them that no one else can be in on. But the boys see it. Everytime his phone buzzes he does his best to look at it as soon as he can just in case it’s her. It’s harder to get out of bed, especially when he hasn’t talked to her in a while. “Can’t wait to kiss you again.”

“You’re a sap, you know.”

“But I’m your sap.”

She giggles, softly, watching cars whizz by. “Yeah, you are my sap.”

_________________________________

Her tour starts off well. And even though it’s her first time being out on the road like this, a constant bouncing around, and completely flipping her normal routine, she manages to cope pretty well. And it helps of course when she calls her friends, or talks to her dog. But it’s still definitely draining, pouring every bit of herself out on stage and then having just enough time to recoup before doing it all over again. There’s value in it, when the lights lift, and she can see the crowd that’s gathered just for her. It’s surreal and makes her feel like she could do this all the time. That the only thing she’d ever need is the sound of a crowd singing her songs back to her.

In her dressing room, she swaps the gold earrings for a pair of acrylic ones, these jade green. “You’re too quiet on me,” she says, flicking her gaze down to her tablet.

Calum picks his head up. “It’s hard to say much when perfection’s staring you in the face.”

She grins, hooking the earring back on. “Thank you, but that’s not what I meant.”

“We just got word about two more festivals in the same week you have your break. One’s in LA still, the other one’s a little ways out.” There’s no need to fake the funk anymore, or hide it away. She has another three weeks of shows before her break. And maybe he expects her to fly off the handle. Maybe he expects her to throw a fit, about how they had made plans, and it’s the only time they’ll get for each other for months.

But she doesn’t. She nods, fingers twirling over her rings. “What are they others saying?”

“They’re itching to get back on stage. And from a business standpoint, it’s money in the pocket of course. But I know we made plans and I feel like an ass. But there’s also the band, too.”

“Our jobs aren’t easy,” she sighs. “Take the gigs.” Calum can see her eyes tearing up just a little. “Mind if tag along on the LA show?”

“Of course not. I’m really, really sorry, buttercup. I’m so sorry.”

She waves her hand, trying to keep the tears back. If they fall, they become real. It’s his job. Just like it’s hers. “I get it.” It’s tight as it leaves her throat. And it takes her a second, plus a few sips of water to get control of her emotions, and clear out all the tears that threaten to fall. He wishes he could say more, or do more. But it’s like the words die in his throat. And he’s left, mouth gaping, wishing and wanting, but unable to do anything.

“Does it look bad if I just forgo my heels tonight from the start? They’re killing my feet on stage,” she laughs.

It’s a small grin, upturns a corner of his mouth but doesn’t keep it up for long. “You usually end up kicking them off anyway, halfway through the show.”

“Someone’s been scrolling through my name on Twitter, huh?”

He does. Watching her is mesmerizing and he’s sad that he can’t get the chance to see it in person, so he resorts to the fan videos. But he’s yet to admit to it. “I do not do such a thing.” And there’s giggles. A fit of laughter as she looks over the outfits and plucks her oversize denim jacket and figures even in the shorts, she can make the docs Calum surprised her with work. So she slides into the worn red leather shoes and starts lacing them up.

Calum whistles, heart racing just a little. He didn’t know those shoes had made the cut. “Look at you.”

She strikes a pose but laughs. “Do I look good?”

“You look fucking amazing, buttercup.”

__________________________

The sound of the crowd roaring before her ears turn on will always make her heart race. Calum said he would try to sneak side stage, but considering that he had to play on the mainstage right after her set on the side stage, it might not be for long. She didn’t mind that. But she hadn’t seen him. Not a blond crop in sight, of course if he hasn’t changed his hair since the last time. Her bassist strums the opening cord and it sends the crowd into a tizzy. With her guitar strapped around, she rolls out her neck, lining up.

As they walk out onto the stage, they launch right into the first song. She feels her fingers buzzing as she strums. But it feels good. The LA sun is hot but she kind of welcomes it versus the heat of the stage lights. There’s still a small breeze. It comes in waves for sure and she can tell that her pits are going to be soaked by song three. “How’s everybody doing?” she shouts into the mic.

There’s cheer in response and she laughs, hearing it reverb for just a moment. “That’s what I like to hear. Just want to say thank you for coming to see me play today. Your support truly means a lot to me.”

She continues on for just a few more seconds and right as she goes to introduce the fourth song of her set, everyone in the crowd starts to get rowdy. She thinks nothing of it, as the song starts. But she knows something is happening and she turns to check her drummer and in her spin, there’s Calum, her bassist’s bass slung over his shoulder, fingers sliding over the frets, plucking at the strings. Not that she doesn’t think Calum would go for a mint green bass on his own, but she hasn’t seen one in his collection just yet.

If it weren’t for the verse coming back up, she knows she would just stare. Singing into her mic, she throws a few glances over to him. Waiting as the harmony comes in and Calum slides up to the music, voice smooth in her inner ears, she almost melts right there on the spot. She hadn’t quite thought about the way his voice would sound with hers, but god, he harmonizes like an angel. She finishes the verse, with a small break before the chorus again. The stage is kind of small but while facing the crowd, she can’t quite see to her sides.

She knows though. She can almost sense when Calum approaches her. She giggles just a little into the mic, watching him smile at her. His head bobbing like it always does when he gets into whatever he’s playing or listening too. Calum plays next to her, watching the way the sweat trails down her forehead, but doesn’t streak an ounce of her makeup. He almost gives in, almost bends in to kiss her on the cheek, but he doesn’t. He lets her voice and the song carry him away, into his spin and up to the drummer’s stand. One foot on the riser, Calum bobs along, laughing at his expression, the raised eyebrow that says it all.

She gets a small break to watch the way Calum interacts with her band. Almost as if he’s known them just as long as she has. And in some ways, he probably has. She talks about Calum to them and talks about her band to Calum all the time. Once the song ends, Calum throws one hand in a tiny wave, before smiling over at her. “Didn’t scare you, did I?” he asks, away from the mic.

She shakes her head, sure that her cheeks will hurt after this. Laughing, she thanks Calum as he walks off stage. And she knows, she knows she shouldn’t. But she jogs after him, as her bassist comes back on, sending a smile over her shoulder too. It’s in that moment that it becomes clear, this was planned. Catching Calum right in the wings, she catches his wrist, tugging him in close before kissing him. It’s quick, but Calum’s heart races in his chest. She runs back out. “Sorry about that guys. I did not expect that.”

And as they get back to their set, Calum watches her for one more song, the way she dances around the stage. Their gazes lock just before he leaves and he blows a quick kiss, before his security are running him down the stage steps and across the festival grounds to get back to the mainstage in time. “How’d it go?” Michael asks.

“Well,” Calum grins, throwing his brown and black bass over his shoulder.

“Get any smooches?” Luke teases, smacking his lips together, while his arm is slung over Sierra’s shoulder.

“And if I did?”

“On stage?” Michael screeches.

“No, side stage. I almost kissed her on stage. But I didn’t want that all over the internet.” Considering that they aren’t official publically in any capacity, it would just cause more headache. Their set begins and Calum knows she has to run across the festival, so he’s not worried when by the time they step out and get three songs in, she hasn’t shown up at the side of the stage. And by the time, Calum regains consciousness enough to check again, there she is, standing off to the side, still in what she performed and breathing hard but she waves, gently from the side.

Out of reflex, once the chords are played, he gives a small wave in return. She returns the blown kiss from earlier and the other girls laugh softly at the action. “God, you guys are so fucking smitten with each other, it’s insane,” Sierra jokes.

There’s no denying it she knows. They’re like lovesick puppies and though it would normally annoy her, it’s nice. Without another word, she sips at her bottle of water and watches Calum, with all the laughs and grins he gives, pouring his soul out onto the stage.

And though the video calls, and the calls, work. They’re not quite enough. Her tour comes to an end, but just around the corner is Calum’s tour with the band. She think she might be able to sneak another week away before she starts working on her album, but then she gets asked to perform at some more festivals in her home country. And, who is she to turn that down? The more shows she plays, the more her name is out there, the more streams, and the merchandise is purchased. It becomes an endless wheel. Things just keep going, and going, and going and the whole time, she keeps looking for the breaks. For the thing that can put her life on pause and let her feel normal again.

Everytime she thinks she can get real time with Calum, it ends up short. He has something that comes up. She has something that comes in. It was the festival in LA and now her festival run. It’s his tour and her sophomore album. Why had she met Calum when she did? Was the universe playing a cruel joke on her? Was it taunting her that it could give her everything she wanted and then threatening to have it crumble? Sitting her hotel room, her phone shakes, another call from Calum. She doesn’t answer it, staring at the fridge in her room. She could get a drink. Wouldn’t be hard just take it from the mini fridge.

Her phone stops shaking. And then a minute later, it chimes, letting her know that a voice message has been left behind. The third one and more likely than not it’s from Calum. She wants this. She wants the relationship, but lately, it felt like there was no time. There was no time for anything. She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t pause. And that’s all she wanted. That’s all she wants right now. She doesn’t want to open that voicemail to Calum pleading with her to answer. She wants to get back to when things were easier. And obviously, they were easier because they both had nothing to do.

Swiping her room key and her wallet, she heads down to the bar in the hotel. She orders herself a glass of wine. The glass makes a soft click as it settles down in front of her. She takes one sip. And it’s a little bitter, the red drier than she remembers it being. Soon the glass stares back at her and she can see her warped reflection. Would it just be easier for them to take things down a level? Is she afraid of hard work or more afraid of heartache?

With another two glasses of wine in her, she climbs back into the elevator and it takes her up, floor by floor until it digs and the doors slide open. The room is dark when she reenters like she left it the AC blasting. But she can see the blue light of her phone, on the desk, lighting up that corner of the room. Is it fair? If she wants to bolt, if she wants to cut ties so it makes things so much easier for them? Why couldn’t it be easy?

Calum’s sure he’s going to pull all his hair out. One moment, things are going good. They get a little tight for sure with their schedules never quite lining up to allow them more time together. But this is the third day in a row that he’s gone with nothing from her. No texts, not a returned call. Not even a meme in their Twitter thread. Nothing on her finsta. Her regular account post mainly about her upcoming shows. But he is as closed to being blocked without actually being blocked.

“Hey, I-I don’t know if something’s gone wrong. But please, please call me back. Or text me. Or send me a voice message. Something. Anything. Please? If I did anything, please let know what it was? I’m worried. Am I losing you?”

He ends the recording and sends it. Maybe he ought to stop reaching out so much. Should he wait for her to respond before sending more? But he doesn’t want to lose her? He doesn’t want to lose what they have. He hasn’t found it with anyone else in all his searching and even in his not searching. This fell into his lap and he can’t stand to lose it. Not when there had to be something to do to save it.

His phone sits for another day and half before she calls. He hands shake as he goes to answer it. He almost doesn’t want to answer it. His vegetable stir fry even threatens to come back up his throat. It’s not even burnt this time. But somewhere in his mind, somewhere deep, he had figured she wouldn’t ever call him back. He would be cursed to always wonder what went wrong. “Hey,” he breathes as he answers the call.

“Hey.” It’s croaky, like she might’ve been crying. And then it’s silent. Neither one of them are sure how to bring it up. Neither of them know how to ask what’s lingering between the two of them seems almost too much for words.

“Did I do something?”

“No,” she sighs. It would be easier if he had. It would be easier if she had. It would be easier if both of them were just bad for each other. “It’s just hard.”

“Talk to me. Let me in. We can figure it out.”

That’s the whole crux of her issue. She had let Calum in. She had let him so far in that it was starting to seem impossible to stay in her country and work. She had let him so far in that she wasn’t sure it would be possible to go months without seeing him properly. He was in everything, her bookshelves, her closet, her studio, her lyrics, her studio, in her sheets. Everything reminded her of him. And it just hurt in a way that she didn’t think being in love could hurt. In her silence, Calum continues on, “Let me look at something.” He scrolls through the emails, looking at the dates.

“How? How do we figure it out? On your tour, the only break you have in my country I’m in promo. And after that, you only get a day here or there. Everything’s so mismatched now.”

Calum blinks the tears that are stinging at his lower lash line. “Something’s gonna give.” Something has to give. There has to be something. Calum goes back to emails. What would be the magic code for them?

“I just don’t know what to do anymore.”

His throat jumps at her words, heart racing. “No, don’t say that. If you say that, I know what comes next.”

“Maybe it would just be easier, Calum.”

He is sick of it. Sick of things always blowing up in his face. But he can’t make her do something. He can’t make her take the words back, even if he wants her too. “We said there was an us.” It’s not accusorary as it falls from his lips. It just hurts. Things were going so well for so long, until time proved herself the ultimate judge yet again. “So what now?” The walls of his house start to push in closer on him.

“I’m not saying I never wanted more for us. I’m not saying that I want to cut you completely out of my life, Calum. I wanted so much more for us.”

“Me too. I want more for us.”

“Is now a good time though? Is now going to allow us more?”

Calum wants to laugh, it bubbles in his chest and he knows it’s delivery would be dry but he swallows it back down. “If you’re always waiting for the perfect moment, you’ll be waiting for a long time.”

“Maybe there’s a better time for us. Not a perfect one. Just a better one.”

“Maybe,” he whispers.

“You know, you’re in everything right? When you said to let you in, I couldn’t help but think that was my problem. You’re in my goddamn sheets. You’re in everything. When the sun rises, it’s like watching you smile. If you think I’m shutting you out, that I’m trying to save myself, I want you to know that I’m doing the exact opposite. I am drowning. In everything. In you. In whatever the fuck it means to be a musician. I am drowning and I can’t bear taking you down with me.”

He couldn’t possibly be in everything, not when she was in everything for him. In his journals, in the strings of his bass. When he sits down at a piano, he can’t help but think of the throaty notes that start the song she wrote about him. He can’t help but hear her voice, Brown irises and black tattoos. Maybe they were both drowning and couldn’t see anything but the water invading their own nostrils and lungs. “You’ll always be there,” Calum says, sniffling. The tears shock him, he hadn’t felt them until they’re running down his neck. He doesn’t even know where there is, but he feels it in the cavity of his chest.

_________________

That video is going to haunt him. And it’ll haunt her too. Whenever they see the videos and pictures of when Calum surprised her on stage it always shows just how fucking happy they were with each other. How things really were working for them. But right around the corner, right as she runs behind the edge of the stage, the world doesn’t see the kiss. They don’t see the tears that followed phone calls. They don’t see how schedules always seems to be running in parallel but never fucking intersectiong. That’s all they needed. Just one point to intersect, to meet again at, and maybe they would still be tagging each other in stupid memes. Maybe they would still be talking until crazy hours of the morning. Maybe they would still be writing small poems about each other and always posting them, but never saying who they were about.

Maybe if they just had the one chance to intersect again, her second album wouldn’t be about him. Maybe she could’ve talked about the way the clouds surf in the sky. Maybe she would have pondered the questions of existence without it being tied up in lost love. Maybe Calum would’ve had more to say in interviews. Maybe then, no one would ask him about his love life and it wouldn’t hurt to goddamn bad every time one of the other boys would jump in to save him. Maybe Calum wouldn’t feel like a rock sinking to the bottom of the river and seeing the sunlight just above him, but never having the willpower to push back up.

He hadn’t removed her number. Hadn’t unfollowed her on her finsta. Hadn’t blocked her on a goddamn platform. Because somehow that felt like a harsher step. Like a permanent close, like he was trying to erase who she was and what she had meant to him. It’s stupid, he knows. It’s insane and it’s not helping him in the slightest, but he can’t bring himself to do it. Maybe part of it was that natural and sometimes detrimental curiosity if that person was suffering just like you. He wanted to know if she bled just like him, if her pain was just as vicious as his.

Calum watches the video loop back again. The way she bites her lower lip but runs after him. The crowd is still screaming. They are still cheering. They are still buzzing. After saving the tweet, he drafts a message to her: I know you’ve moved to New York. I hope you’re enjoying it. City makes you feel anonymous doesn’t it? I have two days off during this tour. Maybe we have our better time now? I’m sure by now you know all the best places in town for pizza. I could be down for some cheesy delights.

Should he send that? His fingers shake. What’s left for them after a year and a half? They’ve still supported each other. He retweets about all her singles and videos. She praises the band’s new music in interviews. They aren’t unknown to each other. But somehow they feel like two ghosts. There’s a glass wall between and they look at each other just in passing. They never touch. They never intersect again. Instead, he exits the messaging app, but doesn’t actually delete the words.

When he goes back to the message thread, about a week from their dates in New York, there’s no shock that the app hasn’t saved it. And he feels partially relieved. He exits the app again and goes back to his mindless scroll through Instagram. An app saved him this time.

There is nothing to save him though, when he walks into the green room and spies her shrugging a coat on. The New York mornings are a little cool to the start. His heart is now in his throat. He’s not sure if he should swallow it back down. “We can go,” Ashton says quietly, taking him back his arm gently.

And somehow, like her ears are tuned in on everything, she hears something like her name, something like a soft wisp of a voice. When she looks up and sees Calum, donned in all black, though his long lined jacket has some white stitching and embroidery, she’s sure she could melt into the floor. He still looks good. Still has the same quiet pout to his face that makes him look slightly less approachable but it changes in a heartbeat when he smiles. She grabs the strap to her bookbag purse.

She knows it was her that ended things. She knows that seeing Calum here in front of her, should make her feel embarrassed. But somehow, all she wants to do, all she’s ever wanted to do since that phone call is embrace him one last time. Tell him that he’s still handsome as ever. Promise him that she meant what she said, that he was and still is in everything. “C’mon. We gotta go,” her security tell her.

But all she can do is stare at Calum. Unzipping her purse, she finds the note, the letter she never had the courage to send him and with a deep breath, she walks over. Ashton looks like he could probably murder her. And she doesn’t blame him. She could never blame that instinct to protect the ones you love especially from the ones that hurt them the most. “I’m sorry,” she says, holding out the white envelope. “For everything. And if we don’t ever get that better time, know I’d only ever wish the best for you.”

Calum’s fingers barely grasp onto the note before she’s sidestepping him. The boys circle around him, like they’re just waiting for his word to pounce. She steps through the heavy glass door. And she’s leaving him again. She’s going to slip through his fingers. Again. Pushing through Luke and Michael, Calum swings open the door. “Wait!” he calls out.

She stops, spinning on her heels to face him again. Calum jogs down the corridor. All the offices have windows. Everyone is probably watching. With both hands cupping her face, letter between his fingers and all, he pulls her in close. “You’re not leaving me again. You’re not going to walk out my life a second time. Not without me putting up a hell of a fight.”

“You shouldn’t fight for me. Not after what I did.”

“Meet me tonight. Let’s actually talk about it. I’ve been holding so much inside and if, god forbid, if it’s not now if we had our shoot and we fucking blew it, at least I’ll know for sure.”

“Does 8 work for you?” She tries so hard not to wrap her hands around his wrist, not to slide it up his forearms and tug herself into his chest. And god, he still smells the same. Old Spice and Gain. It feels so right to press herself into his chest.

“Yeah,” he mumbles into the top of her head. It’s still the same scent as before in almost two years, he can’t even believe it.

She takes a step back, patting at her pockets and pulls out a pen. Pulling the envelope from his fingers, she scribbles down a name and address. “If this place is too far from your hotel, just call me.” He watches her, jotting down more numbers. “It’s my new US number.” While handing the infor back to him, she grins just a little. “Don’t lose it now.”

Calum laughs, remembering the first time she delivered that line to him. “I won’t. Promise.”

Dear Calum,

There’s no real way to say this that doesn’t make my chest feel like it’s been punched in. I shouldn’t have let you go. There was a way to make it all work. There was a way so that you and I could’ve pushed through. I was just too scared of things going too right, going too well. Maybe that sounds dumb. Or maybe that sounds insane. But the truth of the matter, I messed up. I’m sorry. And you don’t have to ever forgive me. You deserve the ability to move on. You deserve everything good that comes to you in the future. I want you to be happy. Even if it’s not with me. Even if our better time has passed.

You deserve to be happy.

Calum reads over the letter again. Still not sure how his lungs are still operating because he was positive all the air had been exhaled. It’s the fourth time he’s read it today. Since he had Michael read it out to him in the green room. He would’ve asked Ashton, but knew that Ashton would’ve told him not to worry, to keep moving forward. Because he had, in a way. He had thrown himself into music. He had tried to chase after her in other people. He had read all the books on poetry, and love, and philosophy. But something down in his gut told him that he would never let her go again if he got a second chance with her.

He looks at the date. She wrote it six months after everything went south. Maybe she forgot to send it. It had his name on it--just never fully addressed out though. She could’ve messaged him. Emailed. Called. Literally anything and he would’ve answered. But hadn’t she? What held her back? And just as he goes to read it over one more time, the door chimes open. He looks at his phone. Just as the time ticks over to 8. And when he glances over his shoulder, there she is. In the same jacket from before.

The little pizza shop isn’t too loud. Most people come in just to get their few slices and then dip right back out. She smiles, waving just a little before sliding onto the stool next to him. She points to the letter, that he hasn’t even moved to put up, “Sorry it’s not my best work. I thought about finding a synonym for happy but nothing fit right.”

With a breathy chuckle, Calum folds the letter up, slipping it into his pocket. “What do you recommend off the menu?”

“God, with this place, anything.”

They settle back down on the stools, paper plates not fully supporting the extra large slices and a stack of napkins between them. The grease runs down his chin and Calum feels it rolling too. But his hands are full trying to keep his slice from falling. She laughs, dabbing at his face with a napkin. “I still see you’re the messiest eater around.”

“Hey, hey, it’s not my fault,” he grins. Their giggles dissipate as the bell chimes again, a signal of another patron entering. “What happened?” The question doesn’t feel full enough, doesn’t feel like it fully encapsulates all the confusion he holds. But yet, those are the only words he has.

“A lot started happening all at once. Your tour, my second album. More shows. It just-I felt like I couldn’t breathe. That I wasn’t a person. And maybe part of it was selfish. Maybe I was trying to save myself all along and I was just telling myself and you that I wasn’t selfish. I really am sorry. Like, if I had known, god if I had known that doing that would’ve caused all the pain it did, trust me, I wouldn’t have. If I could go back and tell myself, that crazy shit happens and you just gotta learn how to keep your cool, I’d do it in a heartbeat. It was a mistake letting you go. But at the same time, reaching out felt wrong too. Like I would’ve been ruining the peace you had created for yourself. And I didn’t want to do that either.”

“You know, I felt like we had something different. Like that was really going to be it for me and I had finally figured out this whole being in love thing. That I wouldn’t have to worry about anything. And maybe that was my mistake. Maybe I saw something happening and didn’t do anything.”

“We were living continents away. With everything happening, you weren’t seeing all of it. No need to blame yourself.” She takes his hand, slipping her fingers between his, twisting at the silver band around his middle finger. “I do want you to be happy, Calum. I want you to be so happy it just can’t be contained.”

“I was with you.” He squeezes her hand, willing her to look at him and not the street in front of them, through the glass.

“I’m still not in L.A.”

“But you are in the same country as me now and I will take that.”

“You’d still take me back after everything?” When she looks at him, brows furrowed together, Calum knows he’s a goner. He always was with her.

“I would.”

“You’d be crazy.”

“I am already crazy. Because I’m tempted to ask you where you’re staying and if I could stay the night.”

He’s leaned in to her, just a hair. And she leans in too, resting mostly shoulder to shoulder. “You are crazy,” she laughs softly, taking in the reflection of the neon lights on the street. “But maybe I’m also crazy too.”

The night is cool again. Both of their boots scuff the concrete. She doesn’t stay far from the small diner, a ten minute walk really. With fingers threaded through each other, they walk huddled close up the sidewalks. The wind whips across their faces. They dodge piles of trash on the edge of the sidewalks and they keep their heads down so as to not attract a crowd. “How do you like New York? Got to be a huge shock?”

“It most definitely is. I like feeling anonymous here. With so many people around.”

“I know you said you don’t do well with people and New York feels like the opposite of the place you want to. Especially not in the city.”

“I mean, I still don’t do great with people. I’m in the city for the time being. But I have my eye on a few places further out. But after everything, I felt less lonely here. I don’t know. No one cared about who I was. No one cared what the fuck I was doing here. And I liked it better that way. Back home, everyone knew. Everyone looked at me like I was a broken vase. Here, no one gave a shit. It’s move or be moved here. Forced me to come to terms with everything. Forced me to accept everything I was trying to hide.”

“Do you need to go to your hotel? Grab or bag or something?” She asks just before they pass the opening for the subway.

“I have my roomkey. It’s all good. All the interviews were today.”

“As long as you’re sure.”

He gives her hand another squeeze. “I’m sure.” They reach the door to the complex and she digs out her keys, opening the front door. Calum follows her through the second set of doors. The elevator is a little janky as it carries them up, and definitely tiny. In the space, they’re pressed chest to chest. There are a few extra lines around her eyes, he notices and runs the pad of his thumb over the skin. It’s just as soft as it’s always been. She feels so familiar under his touch, yet so new.

It’s not a far ascent and she laughs when he pouts as she pulls away. “Just like four more steps.”

It’s true to word, when they step out of the elevator, her door is directly in front of it. Her keys jingle just a little as she works the lock and pushes into the chipping red paint of the door. Her dog leaps from the couch, greeting her and then barking just a little when they spot Calum. He laughs, kneeling to hug them to his chest. “You still remember me, huh?” he laughs, as they attempt to lick his face and jaw. “Oh, too long, I know. Sorry, bubs. Didn’t forget about you.”

She takes his jacket, hanging it by the door. “Want anything to drink?”

Calum shakes his head from her couch, working at his shoes. “No, I’m good, thank you.”

She nods, watching as her dog claims Calum’s attention. But she can’t find an ounce of herself to be mad or annoyed. So she slips out of her shoes and puts them up, before getting herself a bottle of water. When she settles onto the couch, she just laughs at the antics. Calum keeps trying to say something but at every twist, her dog is right there, plopping themselves in his lap. Calum eventually gives up and wraps his arms around their body, scratching lightly at their fur.

“Someone missed you too,” she teases, putting her two fingers really close together. “Just a tiny bit.”

His laughter echoes in her head. “Yeah, clearly just a little.” He lifts his head just a little when he feels the wet tongue at his chin. “So, you’re working on your third album?”

“On and off,” she admits. “Playing more shows than anything for the time being. I don’t have to think. Everytime I think too much I end up fucking something up. So I’m just taking it easy for the time being. Taking some brand deals.”

“You’ve got a collab coming out soon, right?”

She nods at the question, laughing as her dog finally settles down. “Yeah, next month. I’ve always lived kind of a boring life, you know that.”

“There’s a lot I don’t know.” He can finally shift, as her dog wanders over to the water bowl, so that he can sit in front of her. It’s a dangerous game. He’s played it before with her. But he takes her chin into his hands. “We haven’t really talked in a while.”

“Is there something you want to say, Calum?”

“Yeah,” he returns simply. Her breath hitches, eyes searching his brown ones for something, anything that tells her what’s going on. “I wonder if your lips still feel the same. I always thought about the way you’d laugh sometimes into a kiss. And it used to haunt me. But right now, I want to find out if anything else has changed.”

She wastes no time, pushing up and sealing her mouth around his. His hand slides to the back of her neck and she pulls at the collar of his shirt. They fall into each other, then falling into the arm of the couch. She exhales her laughter, still pecking at Calum’s lip. Her fingers tease the skin of his upper chest and neck.

“I was right,” he grins.

She hooks her finger around the gold plate. “I guess you were.” She pulls him back in for another kiss, slipping her hands into his hair.

As his lips trail over her jaw and down to her neck, she thinks about the time at her apartment back home, Calum woke her up with kisses down her jaw. They still feel the same. Maybe even a little bit better. His finger push up the hem of her shirt, squeezing at the flesh of her side. She sighs and Calum groans at the sound. It sets off everything in his body when he hears her quiet noises of pleasure.

“Is this okay?” he asks, pulling away to look at her as his fingers brush over her skin. “I don’t want to push you or take things too fast this time.”

Being with Calum feels like no time has past, if she’s honest. She doesn’t have the butterflies, just the comfort of someone she’s known for a year. And it sort of feels like they’re picking back up from where they left off. “I’m okay with it.”

He grins and she sees it--that rising sun in the gleam. His forehead rests against her. “I kinda feel like we have a lot of lost time to make up for.” His lips brush just over hers as he speaks.

She exhales her laughter again, but agrees. “Just a little bit. I really am sorry.”

“We all make mistakes. You just have to communicate with me, okay? That’s all. Talk to me this time. If you feel like you’re drowning, let me help. Please.”

She pushes up and Calum settles back down into the cushion, taking her hands into his. “I know things won’t be like, perfect now. But I guess, it’s really important that we do get to spend quality time together.”

“It is. And I know my tour schedule is pretty packed right now, but there’s another longer break in about three weeks. They’re LA shows. I don’t know if you have plans, but if you do, we can hang out then.”

She has to laugh because here’s the trouble all over again. “Booked recording sessions then.”

“Okay, well, the week after that is the break between legs. What are you doing then?”

“Nothing.” There’s a break between sessions, and she had just planned to use the time to breathe.

“I’ll fly you out then. Just you and I and my rehearsals. But that’s besides the point.”

Laughing, she rests her head into his bicep. “Just you, I, and your rehearsals. Got it.”

“We’ll have to better plan out things, that’s all. We’ll have to look at both our schedules and make sure that there’s sufficient breaks and time together.” He guides her head up. “I want you. And I mean all of you. I can’t stand to lose you again.”

“I just have to make sure Ashton doesn’t kill me.”

“He’s protective, yes. But not an evil. I’ll talk to him. Don’t you worry.”

“He did write a whole song about how he’d bury a body for you. So I think I have a little bit to worry about.”

Calum laughs, shaking his head. “Maybe just a little bit.” Her grin makes him want to bottle it. He wants to carry it with him in his pocket. Leaning closer, he kisses her again. “But right now, it’s just you and I. There’s nothing else but time for us right now.”

She hums. “I like the sound of that.”

Fingers trail back under shirts. She drinks down his moans as they tease, barely touch. Calum’s shirt is discarded in the living room and her is pulled off in the hallway. Calum holds her face in his hands, memorizing the way her teeth sink into his bottom lip in the gentle nip. He moans. Fuck, she feels so good against him.

Her spine shivers as his fingers trail to her back and unsnap the band of her bra. As the fabric falls from her shoulders and she tosses it somewhere, Calum takes a hand just to cup her. His fingers roll the erect bud and she sighs again, mouth falling slack against his. He laughs. “Hmm, that’s right. Someone does like their nipples played with.”

She grins though, blinking open her eyes. “Don’t think I forgot that you don’t listening to rules and like a little pain.”

Finding her waist with both hands, Calum holds her in close. “You wouldn’t dare.”

She bends her knees, just a little and with hot and open mouth kisses she trails down his chest before taking her teeth into the meat of his peck. Calum jolts, a grunt falling over his lips and throat. “I would dare,” she returns.

They fall into her sheets, the same golden ones from before. They’re just as soft against Calum’s skin. It’s warm, as their skin heats up. Her skirt has landed somewhere to the floor and Calum pushes his hips up as she shrugs the denim down. She kisses over his thighs, moaning just a little. Calum lets his eyes flutter close at her soft kisses.

Everything just feels right. Even as Calum takes a nipple into his mouth, tongue teasing her just a little. Or when she kisses over his length. But right now, she tosses her head back when Calum pries her legs open kissing up her inner thighs. “I’ve dreamed of this,” he whispers, watching as she clenches, more of her arousal leaking from her.

She huffs, pulling a hand through her hair. “You sure do know how to make a girl sweat.”

“It’s a speciality,” he laughs with a wink before kissing her clit. She balls on fist around her sheets, stomach completely clenched. The last thing she wants is to have to wait much longer for anything. The anticipation can be a good thing, though she’s doing everything she can to keep her cool. That is, until Calum finally takes the first lap from her and she unravels, a moan leaving her throat as it mixes with a whine.

He takes his time, pushing her thighs and knees to give him all the access he could ever want. Calum licks another stripe over her, before sucking her clit into his mouth. She taste better than he could’ve ever imagined. Every sound she gives--moans, groans, or a whine--rattles in his brain and spurs him on. One of her hands finds it’s way into his hair and she tries to push up with her hips and his face down into her core. But it’s not like he needs the assistance or the reminder. When he trails down to her opening, his nose brushes over her clit and her body is reeling.

“Oh, fuck,” she whines, feeling the coil in her lower gut tightening.

Calum hums at the sounds, and when she praises him, tells him that he’s the only one to make her feel this fucking food, he rewards, slipping a finger into the mix, pushing up into her. “Is that so?” he asks, watching her head dive deeper into the pillows.

“God, Calum,” she huffs.

Another finger finds it way inside, pushing and curling in all the right places. Her body feels like it’s on fire. She feels like she’s a coil so tightly wound she’s going to break. His tongue flicks across her click, lapping at her. And that’s it, that’s the right combination to send her over the edge. Over she goes, with a yelp, her orgasm rocking her frame and toes curling as she cries out for Calum.

He keeps her going, keeps curling his fingers at her. So lost in the way she sounds. And when the huffs turn into a hiss, he pulls back. She beckons him up, kissing him and tasting her own arousal coating his lips and tongue. He’s careful not to settle fully against her, but it’s quickly changed when her legs come up and lock around his waist. “I’m not gonna break,” she laughs, when he finally let’s go and sinks into her.

She swallows his response with a kiss but it doesn’t matter anyway. Her hips come up and Calum rolls onto his back, letting her settle atop him. Her nails rake down his skin and she sucks at his neck, he’s sure it’ll bruise just a little but it’s okay with him. His nails dig into the flesh of her hips, not sure if he wants the friction right now or if he just needed to revel in the feeling of her against him.

“Shit,” he whines when she rocks over him. “I-fuck.”

She laughs, pulling away to reach into her drawer. “That sounds about right.”

Calum delivers a swift swat to her ass at the joke, but laughs anyway. “That is not funny.”

“Then why are you laughing.” When she turns her attention back to him, condom in hand. She stretches down to kiss him again. “Did I ever tell you you’re not the only one that likes a little pain?”

His eyebrows arches and he smooths over her ass before delivering another spank to her opposite cheek. She sighs, eyes fluttering close just a little. “Oh, buttercup, you should’ve never told me that.”

“We can save it for another time? Because right now the only thing I can think about is riding you until the sun rises.”

Kneading at her breast, Calum grins. “Now, that sounds about right.”

There’s a moment, right as she settles down on him fully, that they both moan at the feeling. Calum because of the warmth and slickness, her because of the stretch. Her head is dizzy again with need. She steadies herself with her hands planted on his chest and rocks. All she can focus on is the girth of him, stretching her completely open. It makes her toes tingle and she falters, falling into his chest, but starts a new cadence, pulling up and settling back down on his length.

“Holy shit,” he huffs. She buries her face into the crook of his neck and Calum coaxes her out, to look at him. “You don’t get to hide from me, not again. Wanna see that pretty face when you cum.”

Her hips are still rocking but she nods, eyes fluttering close just for a moment. Calum kisses her, and it’s his turn to swallow down the moan she feeds him. She pushes back up, pulling her own breast between her fingers. Calum loses the top of his head, he’s sure, watching as she rides him. His fingers trail over her hips, up to her stomach. “Why’d you have to be so handsome?” she teases breathy.

He’s not sure how to respond. Unsure of the heat he feels is a blush or the sweltering of arousal flooding his body. She takes one of his hands, trailing it towards her heat. And Calum takes the hint, thumb circling the bundle of nerves. Her head falls back on her neck as a hum builds in her chest. Calum kneads at her right breast, pulling and pushing at every button he can to have orgasm again for him.

A high pitched squeak falls from her. The bed taps against the wall, but neither one of them really cares. Her orgasm washes over it, like a wave crashing into the shoreline. She shudders, clenching around him and falls again into his chest, but pushes up onto her elbows, remember Calum’s early demand. “Fuck,” she whines when he starts to fuck up into her. He pulls her body up and she’s useless, body still like jello from her orgasm. Her words catch in her throat.

“It’s okay,” he whispers into her ear when she bites down onto his shoulder. “You know I like the pain.”

“Feel so good,” she returns. “Calum, shit, you feel so good.” His hips start to stutter, trying to ride out for longer, but knowing that inevitably he’s at the end of his rope. She kisses over his neck. “Cum for me, yeah? Please.”

Who is he to deny her? Who is he she to defy her? He ruts up once, twice, and she clenches hard, taking most of the wind of his third thrust but he cums hard, arms squeezing her to his chest and he knows he’s loud in her ear as he groans. Though, it’s suspected that’s just the sound she wanted to hear as she seals his mouth with hers.

Calum wraps the towel around his waist. She’s already under the cover, with them flipped down for him. She pats the spot in the mattress. He can see some of the hickies covering her chest that he left behind. Without much thought, Calum dries off a bit more and then slips between the sheets. “Hey,” she whispers. “Come here often?”

“My first time actually. But the first of many, I hope.”

Her nose scrunches as Calum taps it. “Yeah, of many. I brought your phone into the room. Put it on my spare charger. And I know that it’ll go off at 5:55 AM. No, you don’t have to turn it off. I know it’s important to you.”

“You--you still remember that?

“I don’t know if you really remember. But when I said that you were in everything, you were everywhere. I meant it.” She turns to her back, the sheets tucked up to her chin. Both of them are bare beneath them.

Calum’s taken up drawing random patterns on her stomach as he holds himself up on his elbow, facing her. “I remember. Could never forget that.”

“Guess we might’ve meant for something more, something better.” Her voice is soft. The blinds in her window let the lights of the city in. Nothing about it is quiet as sirens pass by. Calum lets his head fall into her pillows. She turns, both of them now facing each other again. Her arm slides over his waist. He throws one of his legs over hers.

She’s content like this, where she can kiss across the tattoos on his chest. Though she can’t really see the one just under his peck, she thinks about the question poised there. Why would she choose anything other than Calum? It remains quiet for a while and she thinks he’s fallen asleep until his chest rumbles.

“We were. It was just a matter of getting there. Finding the right path for us.” He’s positive, as she shuffles in a little closer that this is it for him. And if he has to fight hell, heaven, or high water, he’d do it all for her.

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literaphobe · 4 years

Note

I finished watching she-ra yesterday! I decided to watch it after seeing your posts on my dash a lot and watched the whole thing in just over a week. Can you recommend some more she-ra blogs to follow?

i’ve recced blogs before but i barely knew anyone back when i did that. this time i know a couple more people and even tho im not like miss popular nor do i talk to every one i’ll do a blog rec that’s a tiny bit more thorough! (disclaimer, this is low key in order of people that showed up on my blog aka i reblogged something from them etc hgdfjsd not according to like. how much i love them or anything)

@catradoraism mmm i’m p sure i indirectly rec jules as a blog a few times every day, because of how i sometimes. talk about her. anyway i hate jules! but she does have a really great blog, she makes very good posts and is very talented. she can draw and write really well, and is just a lot more talented than me. follow her u will regret it but do it anyway <3

@catralatina mar is unfairly big brained. they are galaxy brained and make incredible posts and they get really good asks too! so if you’re looking for a blog who’s got good rapport w their followers, look no further! also they are a talented writer and i saw some of their art it’s good. one time they posted a picture from an atla comic and i thought they drew it. it was very embarrassing <3 but yes if you’re not following them u should!!

@catralovesgirls yo definitely follow izzy!! he has excellent takes and i’m like scrolling through his top posts section right now and it’s like impeccable. mine are hm! well! but if you’re following me following izzy would definitely be a step up <3 he also writes fic and i uh admittedly have not read any (sorry i have read like less than 20 catradora fics :( all of which came from page 1-2 of the tag filtered according to kudos. i’m still working on this oneshot but i will def check out his fics when i’m done and so should u all!)

@catheriaa yes follow cath!!!!! cath said adora hair down jacket open rights! cath said good posts rights! ur takes are very good congratulations on making excellent meta with excellent points <3 also ur post about the inherent rivalry of people with adora icons vs people with catra icons FGHHGH

@mer-mystery is like straight up excellent. good posts, good reblogs! for some reason i will definitely always list them if u ask me for good she-ra blogs. also like that url. inspired. literally just look at mine n u know immediately who is quality and who isn’t. i also think she leaves great tags, so it’s a treat when she reblogs one of my terrible posts <3

@gfshera karlie is quality!! love her takes love her posts love her tags. things i remember about her aside from this is her new girl au and the one time i reblogged some incorrect killing eve post and she immediately made it into a bfs post, which i wanted to make but didn’t know how. so clearly they are smarter than me <3 although being smarter than me. not the highest praise gdfhsdj

@swordlesbean one of those. god tier blogs. intimidating but in a good way, they write Meta™ and its very articulate and thorough and well put together!! they’ll link to like past meta within one meta sometimes and its like they’re sourcing their work and its kinda cool ngl!!

@marahoping YES definitely follow kenna!!!!! love her gifs like so much it’s the chef’s kissness of it all....... also will post other good things not just gifs, very entertaining blog in general to follow!

@horde-princess yeah!!!! Big Love for their content and posts and they got sick ass meta and they write fic!! (once again i am not sure i have read the fic of anyone listed here. i am very sorry. i know, i should be lynched) very very worth the follow. very value for money <3

@scorpia a perfect character url? how are u not already hitting that follow button. no they are not hogging the url. they run a full very good blog too! definitely makes good posts of a variety of types, like meta, funnie stuff, and this one richard siken post because bro...

@catriadora a great gif maker! scrolled through some of their top posts and they made some gifs/sets that i really liked! you’ll love her too!

@homophobicshadowweaver very funny posts in the top posts section ghdfjshfds also eleanor has read the she-ra books? the ones that like that letter from adora to catra came from? and i remember seeing ur posts about it and it was really fun to follow :) also that url. incredible. just by having that url u prove ur funnier than most people on here congratulations

@egirlcatra i really like u a lot ghdfjsdhdfsj def has good tags and takes and very fun to interact with <3 go send them asks!

@appsa i like LOVE their art and also they are so fun to interact with! they have other good posts too obviously and they have funny tags and buddy. once again love ur art its good as well as being very funny i need like so much more of it

think i will stop here now. my apologies if i follow u and left u out, or if i recced u last time and forget to rec u again ghdfsjfhd. also there are some people i follow that i wanted to rec but their blogs aren’t fully she-ra so i decided not to? idk. this took a while so ya definitely follow these blogs, and to these blogs have a nice day keep doing you <3

#ask #i used some of ur names sorry if thats not ok u can just tell me n i'll remove #also if i got anyone's pronouns feel free to scold me about that too #uh..... if you think u deserve to be recced but weren't #idk what to say #seduce me or something #we'll see what we can do! lmao #also to the people recced sorry if i didn't talk about ur blogs properly or well enough or i said something too wild #unless this made u happy then haha ur welcome uwu #anyway i should stop talking in the tags now bye!#clueless-human

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random-mha-thoughts · 4 years

Text

Here we are

Honestly, I never thought I’d get here. I thought I’d come here, write some stuff that I thought would be fluffy and cute and the rest of the fandom might enjoy reading too, and maybe get a few hundred followers in return. I didn’t expect that I can say there are 1000+ people who have read at least one of my posts and waits for more because they like what I put out. I have trouble wrapping my head around it.

I’m gonna pause right here for a sec because I wanna take this time to wish you guys Happy Easter and Happy Passover for those who are celebrating as I am with my family. My university sucks and doesn’t give the religious holidays off anymore because they don’t wanna be skewed towards any particular religion anymore even if the President is a Jew ffs so I haven’t been able to spend Passover with my family in LA for the past 3 years, but this year really hit harder because of the virus, and it’s the first year my parents decided to do the seder ourselves instead of with my larger family. Although I’m upset about that, I appreciate my immediate family for coming together and making great memories because of it, and I really hope you guys also come to appreciate that as well, even if you’re not celebrating a holiday this week or anytime soon. Sometimes we take for granted what’s right in front of us because we think it’ll conveniently be there forever, but be conscious of that for even a brief moment.

Anyway, I really can’t thank you all enough for following me. It’s been a fun 3 months with this blog so far and I’ve made some great friends, written some great stuff, gotten amazing requests that i’m still writing sorry T.T and I can’t express how much I’ve appreciated you. I read every notification, scroll through every reblog, smile at every like, and love every reply/comment. I’m really happy that there are people out there who I can reach with my content and make your day a little better as we share our fandom. My heart is so full 💖

I’m gonna take a few moments to call out some of special people I’ve met here:

@lovingshoto Angie, you’re such a sweetheart and one of my closest friends here, I really hope you go far and gain your own following on this site for your writing because you deserve it 😘💖 I’ll always be here for you~

@tokoyamis-luv Zara you lovely bean you! I enjoy all your little messages in my ask. You’re my little baby who I want to protect forever and ever, thank you for lending me your mind for when I’m in a rut with writing. I love you 😘💖

@todorokiakina1 my darling, we talk almost every day, I hope you get your writing juices back up and running, I believe in you! Thank you for always chatting with me 💖

@sunshhinnee I remember you as the first few follower who took the time to like and reblog everything I wrote in my early days, and for that I’m so thankful for you 💕

@rintomoj @xi-i-i-whatsyouremergency @estrellitaaart @aurora-vorealis @imconfusedanditsok @shoujo-roki @cyanide9602 @uacrack ik we’re mutuals on my main and we don’t talk often but hmu?? tag me in shit?? idk lets interact more and talk

All the admins at @bnhaclaimedmysoul for being so nice and inspiring me to start my writing blog in the first place, my heart especially goes to @evnscntspul for being a sweetie moot on my main

@evielament @soulily0 @musically-inclined-fangirl @fandomfreak1000000 @zyxys1 @multifandom-fanfic @fucking-super-yikes @the-lonely-pie @roeroeroeyourboet I don’t have the time to go through every single person who’s liked/reblogged every single thing/most things I’ve written (there are a lot of you, i see you guys, trust me) but I definitely notice you guys the most

@bnhaloser my precious little sweetheart thank you for your love and fanfic readings on your youtube channel, please get some sleep and I hope you’re not burning yourself out too much! I’m still looking after you from the shadows 👀

@birds-have-teeth Ashi my precious senpai who noticed me 🥺 i love you, thank you again for putting me on your author recs list, i’m so grateful for you 🙏🏻

@shoutodoki @justshotoswifeisall my senpai friends Val and Kayla, you’ve both inspired me and you already know how much i love and appreciate you, but i’ll say it again for good measure l love youuuu 💖💖💖

Special shoutout to @adainelartz @boomboombakugou and all the anons who have ever sent me all the lovely requests! I’m finishing them up, I’ve been busy with school stuff and I’ve been burnt out, but I’ll hopefully finish a few more this weekend into next week!

And one more big thank you to every person reading this post, whether you’re a brand new or old follower, if you’ve only read one of my posts or you’ve liked my entire masterlist, whether you’re a quiet reader or a vocal one, I really do appreciate you all and I’d like to give you all warm hugs. You guys keep me going and I couldn’t have gotten this far without every single one of you, and I can’t express my gratitude enough 💕💘

So! I’ll be doing requests this weekend, BUT I’m gonna be opening a 1K followers special event this weekend for anyone who wants to participate! It’ll be mostly ask box stuff with a little something for the creatives to try their hand at as well. I might even extend it to next week or until I hit 1,100 just for fun. I look forward to talking to you guys then!

If you’ve reached the end of this long, mushy note, you’re a real trooper 👍🏻 Please take care of yourselves mentally and physically in these rough times. I wish all of you health, safety, and calm in your social-distancing/quarantining. Stay on top of your work/school but remember to take breaks when you need it 💙

With lots of love hugs and smiles

~Tiny

#follower milestone #follower appreciation #1000 followers #Tiny's 1000 Follower Special #tiny talks #i get mushy really easily okay #sorry

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writingformadderton · 4 years

Text

The Book of You and I - Part 4

Ship: Madderton

Word Count: 3458

Summary: Taron keeps his distance from his friends and Richard,feeling betrayed. Richard gives him time but it quickly shows how bad they cope with it. When they mess up a scene Richard suggests to talk about it and Taron wants Dexter with them to calm them both down. During the talk a lot of things come up that change Taron’s life all over again.

Additional Tags: emotional hurt, dizzy, Tiny dancer, argument, memories, crying, comfort

Dedicated to @taron-eggmcmuffin ❤️

Part 3 Part 5

Taron stays at home during those two weeks and barely eats anything. He knows he should, but he can’t convince himself to do so. His head hurts and he’s emotionally unstable, feeling terrible.

He looked up his and Richard’s name for the first time and found articles about them getting into the car crash. As he scrolls further down, he finds some where they suggested a relationship between them. Taron clicks on “images” and finds a ton of them. Most are of them being outside together, having dinner or giving interviews. Taron looks at the pictures closely and sees the looks they shared. “God you’re getting brainwashed by these dumbass articles.” he growls and finds a interview of them on YouTube. He considers watching it and stares at his screen for ten minutes until it turns off automatically. Taron gives himself a push, logs back in and clicks on it. “Holy shit.” he breathes out when he sees it’s from five years ago. He looks at himself, only twenty-four back then and Richard next to him, twenty-seven years old. They fool around through the interview just like they did a couple weeks ago. He watches other ones and sees the way their behavior with each other changes throughout the years. They get more comfortable around another, finish each other’s sentences and seem to know exactly what the other one is going to say. But were they really a couple? Not possible. Probably just stupid shit talk.

He throws his phone aside and stares up at the ceiling. Tomorrow would be his first day back at work. The first day he sees Dexter and Richard. Bryce told him she would be on set tomorrow as well to keep him company and Taron was glad to have her around.

Taron isn’t fully sure if it’s good to return to work tomorrow, but he knows he needs a daily routine again. He sat around the house more than he could possibly remember of his old life. T growls a bit and turns onto his side, staring out of the window. It’s like the bright sun and deep blue sky wanna mock him, not fitting his mood at all.

After a sleepless night, he gets up with a horrible headache and takes a quick shower. He dresses up slowly as every movement hurts his head and grabs his apartment keys. Welp, welcome back to the real world.

On set he is greeted by Bryce, who watches him worried. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Just haven’t slept properly the last four days.” he says and rubs his face tiredly. If this bloody headache would stop, he would feel better.

She hands him a pair of glasses. “Put those on.”

“Thanks.” he mumbles and follows her to the main building. Going in with Bryce by his side gives him a bit of security. Inside, he takes the glasses off again. The light isn’t as bright. When he comes inside the meeting room, he sees Dexter chatting with Jamie and Elton is also here today.

Just when they’re about to start, Richard steps inside, taking off his sunglasses. T glances at him and sees the dark circles underneath his eyes, the same he had seen beneath his own this morning. Ten minutes into the meeting, Taron feels himself getting dizzy and looks down at the floor irritated. His head hurts and he starts to feel sick while his world starts spinning.

“Taron, are you okay?” Bryce asks worried as her friend stumbles a bit and tries to hold himself up.

Richard looks over at them and tenses when he sees how pale Taron gets. “Sit him down.” he says to Bryce. Jamie helps her sit Taron down on the floor. Richard walks over to him and sits down in front of him. “Are you dizzy?” he asks and looks at him observantly.

“Mm.” T just hums and tries to blend out the black spots before his eyes.

“You should drink some water.” Rich says and takes a bottle from Dex. He opens it and holds it towards Taron. T takes it with shaking hands and takes a tiny gulp. Richard watches him closely. It’s scary to see him like that again. “When did you eat properly the last time?” he asks, knowing T stopped doing it whenever he was sad or extremely stressed. Taron just shrugs his shoulders and Rich nods slowly. The rest starts talking, giving them some space and Taron rubs his face tiredly. “Can we talk later?” Richard asks low enough for only T to hear and Taron looks at him shortly before shaking his head with tears in his eyes. “Okay. Then go home, eat something and get some sleep. You definitely pushed it too far.” he says.

“I can only tell you the same.” Taron says and raises his eyebrows at him.

Rich laughs weakly and pushes himself up. Taron gets up as well shaking a bit and sits down on the sofa. Bryce sits next to him and rubs his shoulder shortly. Dexter continues and Richard leans against the wall, feeling his own body growing tired. T was right. He needs sleep and a proper meal. But the last two weeks have made it impossible. He felt bad about lying to Taron, and he still doesn’t know the whole truth.

Three days later, both of them come to set feeling better physically. T shoots the Tiny Dancer scene and has some fun on set with Jamie before starting to sing. Soon enough, it’s already late and he’s freezing from standing in the dark, cold nighttime atmosphere. He sits on the top step of a little staircase and the scene starts. Taron hears Richard approaching him and takes a deep breath. Rich starts saying his lines and sits down next to him. As soon as Taron looks into those deep blue eyes, he feels the hurt welling back up inside him. He looks at him remaining silent and feels a tear running down his cheek. “I can’t do this.” he whispers and Rich bites his lower lip. “I can’t pretend to fall in love with you after what happened.”

“I know.” Richard says low-voiced and looks at him sad. “I’m sorry, T. Can we talk about it, please?”

Taron takes a shuddery breath and looks down at his knees. “When?”

“After the shoot maybe? I’ll drive you home… if you want to.” he suggests.

T nods slowly. “Okay. But I think we should take Dex with us.”

“Yea.” Richard says and gets up. “Dex?” he shouts and Dexter comes over to them. “We can’t do this right now. Not like this.” their director nods and looks at them. “We wanna talk about it.”

“Everything?” Dex asks and watches Richard curiously.

“Everything.” he says firmly and nods.

“Can you come with us? Probably won’t end well otherwise.” T admits and gets up.

“If that’s okay with you.” Dexter says and Taron nods. Seems like his friend wasn’t that mad at him.

Richard changed into jeans and a sweater, which is a lot more comfortable at 11:30pm than the suit he was wearing before. Taron changed into a pair of blue jeans and his favorite sweater. Seeing it makes Rich smiles a bit. It’s one of his that Taron kept when they got together. They sit down at the round table and Taron doesn’t know where to look.

“Do either of you wants to start?” Dexter asks them and both remain silent, hoping the other one would start. “Taron?”

T shifts in his seat a bit before looking at them. “You two made me feel like shit, honestly. You lied to my face and you were the ones I trusted with my stupid life that I know nothing about.” he feels the tears coming back but he doesn’t care this time. They needed see what they did to him. How he felt.

“I can understand that you’re upset about it but we had our reasons. The last time Richard tried to tell you, you told him kindly to leave and never talked to him again because you couldn’t remember him.” Dex states.

“Oh and that’s my fault now? I wasn’t the one who was driving. I was the victim in this crash.” Taron growls and shoots his friend a glare.

“Okay, next time I’ll run over a woman and probably kill her. Is that what you want?” Rich spits out and looks at him angrily. What happened that evening was neither his nor Taron’s fault. “You’d be traumatized now, just like I am. Sometimes it’s better not to remember something.” he says and sees Taron’s face going blank.

“Yeah, because you’re having such a hard time.” T laughs pejoratively and rolls his eyes.

“You don’t know shit about me. So don’t judge me on the last two months you’ve known me.” Richard says harshly and looks at him serious.

“And that’s it.” T leans forward and looks at him, feeling himself getting angry. “I don’t know shit about all of you. I don’t know shit about where I grew up, my family, my friends. The worst out of all of them is I don’t know shit about myself.” his voice cracks as he leans back in his chair again and shakes his head. “And it’s fucking gross to play with that, both of you. You don’t lie to someone who feels lost and depends on stories from others.”

“I tried to protect you, Taron. I know this wasn’t the best way.” Rich tries and gets cut off by Taron letting out a loud breath.

“If I really mean so much to you that you feel the need to protect me…then don’t fucking play with my issues.” he says through gritted teeth. “I need to be able to trust you, because trust is all that I have left.”

“I know.” The Scottish mumbles.

“No you don’t! Everyone thinks they know how it is for me, but they don’t. I can’t sleep because I’m constantly overthinking. I forget to eat. I panic late at night when my brain realizes once more there’s nothing left to remember!” he stops for a moment and wipes away the tear on his cheek. “I pull myself out of this shit day after day. You weren’t there to help!”

“I was, Taron. As you know now, I drove the bloody car. I was the one calming you down when you hit your head and I pulled you out of the car unconscious and covered in blood.” Richard says and it’s the first time he actually puts it into words in front of Taron. His throat gets tight at the thought of Taron at that evening.

“Well you were gone after the car crash, left me on my own. Where was the guy the media called my boyfriend, huh? Probably realized I’m no longer useful and just dropped me off at home.” Taron spits out and tucks his legs up on his seat.

“Who told you that shit?” he asks frowning.

“Don’t answer with a question.” he just says and looks at him, challenging him.

“I picked you up from the hospital and brought you home. On the first day, you handed me a picture of us. The second day, you said you need space. You practically erased me from your life. I would’ve never left you willingly.”

Taron remains silent for a moment and all the anger slowly fades. “And how should I know that you’re not lying to me again, right now?” he asks tiredly.

“Taron, Richard was your boyfriend.” Dexter steps in and T looks at him with raised eyebrows.

“How could you wanna prove that? With some shitty articles blogs would post when I went out with whoever for dinner tonight?” his voice shakes heavy now and he slips into hurt and sadness instead of anger now.

“I can’t do more than tell you again, I was there.” Rich says tiredly, getting frustrated.

“Prove it.” T says and shrugs his shoulders.

Richard groans and rubs his face. How the fuck was I supposed to prove the relationship was real? Suddenly, he remembers the letter he wrote for Taron on the day he left. “Hey, my name is Taron Egerton. I was involved in a bad car accident and am suffering from a retrograde amnesia, which means I forgot a lot.”

Dex watches him confused. “What the heck are you doing?”

“Shut up for a second.” T says and looks at Richard shocked.

“If I feel bad right now, it would be lovely if you could get me to a hospital. If I’m on my own and I don’t know what’s going on, I should call my mother.” Richard continues with a shaking voice.

“Here is her number. Thank you.” Taron finishes it and Richards nods. “Why the fuck do you know this?”

“Because I wrote that when I brought you home and you didn’t want me around anymore.”

Taron gets up quickly and gets a pen and a piece of paper. “Write it down.” he says and presses his lips together. Rich does as he says and writes down the first sentence. Taron recognizes his hand writing immediately and swallows hard. Did he really -?

Richard takes out his phone and removes the phone case. He takes out a picture and hands it to Taron. “That’s what you gave me.” Taron looks at the picture. That’s actually very cute. He’s smiling softly into the camera while Richard presses a kiss into his hair with his eyes closed. His eyes fill with tears and he looks back at Rich shocked. “That’s my sweater.” he says and points at T.

“It’s my favorite.” Taron admits and looks down at the dark blue soft sweater that gave him comfort so often before.

“I know.” Rich smiles softly. He searches for Taron’s number and presses call. The words “My love” appear on the screen and Taron looks down at his phone a bit startled. “The reason why my Air Pods connected so fast to your phone was because we always listened to your music with my headphones.” Richard looks up to Taron, standing there completely in shock and disbelief. “Can I show you something on your phone?”

Taron nods timidly and hands it to him. He watches Richard opening his photo gallery and scrolling down to the folder with the password. “I didn’t know the password, so I couldn’t open it.” Richard types it in and looks up to him shortly, before writing it down at the piece of paper. Taron’s eyes fill with tears and they threaten to fall down his cheeks as he sees the words “Theloveofmylife.”. He turns pale when he looks back at his phone and sees all the pictures of Rich and him kissing, cuddling, holding hands or at premieres together.

Taron falls onto his chair heavily and takes his phone back with shaking hands. He looks at the letter, Richard’s handwriting and the password. “Fuck.” is all he gets out and buries his face in his hands for a moment. When he looks up, tears are rolling down his face and he lets out a shuddery breath, tangling his hands in his hair while leaning forward. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he asks and his voice cracks in the middle of the sentence.

“When you knew about it and pushed me away, I decided to not tell you this time. I wanted to let you figure things out on your own and put the pieces together with time. It felt like forcing the fact of us as a couple onto you.” Richard explains lowly. “You can’t tell someone that they love you.”

“I-I don’t know what to say right now.” T says and his voice threatens to crack again.

“Do you understand now why we didn’t tell you about Rich and you in the first place?” Dex asks carefully and T nods slowly.

“How long have we been together?” he asks and looks at Rich, who watches him sad.

“Seven months. You wanted to make it official because you were sick of hiding it. You were talking about a future together and - two minutes later we crashed into a wall.”

“So we were happy?” Rich nods. “Did we fight?”

“Not often, harmless.” he says. “It was always about unimportant things and you came back after five minutes to cuddle.” he chuckles softly.

“Was I-Was I a good boyfriend?” he asks timidly.

“The best.” he says with a sad smile.

Taron sits up straight and nods slowly. “Tell me about the car crash. Please.”

Richard knows he’s the only one who can tell him the whole story and so he gives in. “Everything was fine until a drunk woman suddenly crossed the street. I couldn’t stop the car fast enough, so I pulled sideways. We crashed into a wall and you hit your head really bad. Had a nasty wound on your forehead. I was a bit caught up in the shock but then you asked for me and threw up. You couldn’t sit up straight because of the pain and I tried to calm you down… And then you passed out.”

“Did I say anything before I passed out?” Taron asks curiously.

“I love you forever, okay?” Richard hesitantly says and swallows hard after seeing Taron’s face going blank. “Listen, I won’t force anything onto you and if you don’t feel good around me anymore I’ll back out of the role. Blame it on stress or whatever.” Rich rubs his face tiredly and bites his lower lip nervously. “If you want me to go, I’ll do it.”

The Welsh looks up to him caught up in thoughts. “Why would you do that?”

“Because you were the most important person in my life and I wouldn’t do anything to make you feel bad on purpose.” Richard looks down at the table for a moment. “Which is why I felt like shit as well those past two weeks.”

Taron watches him startled and looks deep into Richard’s eyes. He wasn’t lying. T looks back at the picture and the letter before looking at Richard. “I’m so sorry for this mess, Rich.” he says and his voice cracks. “And the car crash wasn’t your fault. I was talking dumb shit.”

“It’s not your fault, T.” Richard assures him weakly.

Taron grabs his hand hesitantly and looks at him with tears in his eyes. “I’m so sorry, Rich.” Richard smiles at him sadly and shakes his head. It wasn’t Taron’s fault that he forgot everything. “Can I hug you?” T asks timidly as he gets up and Rich just opens his arms, doing the same. Taron wraps his arms around his waist and buries his face in his shoulder.

Richard tightens his hesitant grip around Taron and softly rubs his back as he starts crying. “Hey, it’s okay.” he whispers and Taron just shakes his head.

His whole world just got turned upside down. Again. He would have never thought that Richard and him had been a thing. Maybe that was the reason that he felt so good around him so quickly and got hurt so badly when he found out about the lie. “I’m so sorry. I completely ignored the fact that I’m not the only one who’s struggling with this.”

“You didn’t know. It’s okay, bub.” Rich says and fondles over his hair. He knows exactly where to touch him to calm and comfort him.

“Please give me a chance to make it right again. I was talking shit about you.” T begs and clings onto him.

Richard pulls back and cups Taron’s face. “Calm down. You did nothing wrong.” he looks into his sad puppy eyes and feels the urge to kiss him. But he holds himself back and wraps him into a hug again. “Don’t blame yourself now, please.”

“I’m so sick of this shit.” T sniffs into his shoulder.

“I know.” Rich mumbles. “Me too, T. Me too.”

“Please don’t lie to me again. I really can’t take this.” he chokes out and sobs into his shoulder helplessly.

“I won’t.” Rich promises and plants a soft kiss into his hair.

@fuseburner @sarahegerton96 @multicoloredchicken @primaba11erina @anxiety-at-the-classroom @maddertonmyheart @madderton-obsessed

#taron egerton #Richard Madden #taron x richard #madderton #dexter fletcher #taron egerton fic #richard madden fic #madderton fic #taron egerton fluff #madderton fluff #richard madden fluff #emotional hurt #hurt/comfort #Memories #memory loss #the book of you and i

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elcorhamletlive · 5 years

Link

Fandom: MCU (post-Avengers) Ship: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark Tags: Fluff, Pining Tony Stark, Steve Rogers and the 21st Century summary: As Steve discovers the internet, he also discovers old memes.

As Tony and Bruce climb out of the lab, the sound that echoes in the room is so foreign that it takes Tony a moment to realize it’s a laugh, and one more moment to realize it’s Steve’s.

At the top of the staircase, Tony sees him on the couch, and yeah, he’s laughing. Not politely chuckling or awkwardly forcing a laugh, mind you, but actually, genuinely having a belly laugh, complete with a pink flush all over his face, his eyes turning into tiny blue streaks as he wipes them with back of his hand, catching his breath.

It’s—well. It’s a vision, to be blunt.

“Sounds like you’re having fun,” Bruce says, and that’s the understatement of the year, because Steve looks downright delighted. He struggles to catch his breath, still grinning helplessly as he looks away from his phone.

“Oh,” he says, as if he’s just realized their presence. His flush deepens, Tony notices. Steve’s has kind of an ugly flush, that shows up in red spots coming up from his neck as well, instead of sticking prettily to his cheeks. Tony sticks his hands in his pockets to control his itch to touch it. “Hi.”

“Hey, Cap.” Clint throws himself on the couch next to him and leans, trying to take a pick at his phone. It’s rude, but Tony can’t really blame him, because he’s one step away from offering actual money to find out what made Steve laugh like that. “What are you looking at?”

Steve controls his grin into a more schooled smile, but he still perks up , and in a moment Tony is right behind the couch, leaning forward to place his hands over the cushion. From behind Steve’s broad, sculpted-by-the-Gods back, he catches a glimpse of a Twitter feed.

“I was trying to learn how to use, hmm—Twitter, right?” He pronounces it correctly, which really shouldn’t make Tony want to kiss him in congratulations, but it absolutely does. “And I found this, this page…” His face twists in an effort not to laugh. “You’re not gonna believe it. Here, I’ll show you. You guys need to see this.” He holds up the phone a little higher for Tony and Bruce to see.

As he types – a little slower than most people would – a name into the search bar, Tony’s heart kind of breaks.

“It’s genius,” Steve says, as the account opens. “I was just looking at this one—”

“Wait,” Clint interrupts. “Are you serious?”

“What do you mean?” Steve asks, with a little frown between his eyebrows that Tony’s hand itches to smooth it out. “I know it seems silly, but it’s really funny.” He turns, and, at Clint’s gaze, grows more indignant. “The pictures are very good and the captions are really creative.”

“I know,” Clint says bluntly. “It’s Dog Rates, Cap. They have over eight million followers. It’s a huge account. Everyone knows it.”

Steve’s frown vanishes, but it’s replaced by something a lot worse: surprise, and then a clear, raw disappointment that he does his best to mask. His posture deflates, his hand going to the back of his neck, rubbing it.

“Oh,” he says, and he’s back to his usual man-out-of-time voice, probably feeling old and stupid, the excitement from before already a distant memory.

It’s legitimately like someone turned off the sun. So, really, nobody can blame Tony for saying, “I didn’t know it.”

Steve looks at him. “Really?”

“Really?” Clint asks, a thousand times more skeptical, and Tony gestures flippantly at him.

“Not all of us have free time to troll on Twitter, Barton,” he says. Then he turns to Steve, who’s watching him with wide blue eyes that almost make him forget how to form words. “So? What’s all the fuss about?”

“Oh, yeah,” Steve says, a hesitant smile already blooming on his face. He turns further to show his phone exclusively to Tony, signaling for him to lean further so their heads are closer, which isn’t a configuration Tony minds, at all. “See, it’s very simple – they post a picture, and give it a rate. At first, I thought it seemed a little harsh, because, really, which dog should ever get a low rate, right? But, see—all their rates start out at ten.”

He proceeds to show some of his favorite posts. Tony’s seen them all, either from following the account or from random dog memes Rhodey sends him sometimes, but he plays along, ooooh- ing and awwwww -ing at the right moments, and in no time Steve is grinning again, glad to be explaining something to someone else for a change, feeling in the loop.

Some people could say what Tony’s doing is lying, but he disagrees, because he isn’t faking it at all when he grins back.

After Steve finds out Dog Rates, it doesn’t take him long to find Thoughts of Dog, which he finds even more delightful. He shows it to Tony during breakfast, sitting next to him on the counter as they go through the tweets together.

“This is amazing,” Steve says. He’s at that stage where it seems like his cheeks hurt from smiling. Tony thinks he should look like this more often. Maybe all the time. “When they explained it at SHIELD, I thought the internet was more of a tool, like a huge encyclopedia. And obviously, it is, but it didn’t occur to me it could be…”

“Fun?” Tony asks.

Steve looks at him and smiles. Tony is quite fond of that sequence of events.

“Yeah,” he says. When he smiles like that, a dimple shows up in his cheek.

Tony isn’t even a dog person, but it couldn’t matter less.

Steve eventually expands his knowledge of animal memes and pages to include cats, which means Tony starts receiving lots of videos that were, at one point, considered the pinnacle of internet humor, with cats playing piano and sliding over wood floors.

Steve finds out about Grumpy Cat a few hours before he learns she’s dead. In between, he texts Tony a bunch of pictures of her with a message reading “this is how you look at morning team meetings”.

Tony honest-to-God giggles, because, really, he’s a lost cause.

A few moments afterwards, he receives a lengthy message of Steve saying he just found the cat in the picture had died, but she had apparently lived a long and happy life and so he hoped Tony wouldn’t be sad by finding this out.

Since Tony doesn’t immediately answer (because there’s a marching band leading what is apparently an eternal fourth of July parade in his chest), Steve then apologizes for sending the memes in the first place, and, look—if nobody sees Tony sighing, nobody can prove anything, regardless of what the dopey smile on his face might suggest.

On a remarkable occasion, Steve sends in a “important Avenger news – waiting for your thoughts, Iron Man” e-mail, and, when Tony opens it, he’s rick-rolled in front of his entire office.

“This is the cringiest shit I’ve ever seen,” Clint, who’s there to get suit upgrades, says.

“Shut up,” Tony says.

“SHIELD has informed him we think it’s best if he doesn’t have a Twitter account,” Natasha, who’s there to have lunch with Pepper, says, and even through her supreme spy training Tony can tell she has to try hard to keep an even expression. “For his… reputation.”

“Oh, shut up,” Tony repeats. “It would only make him more popular, and you know it.”

Natasha shrugs with a knowing smile. “To some people, maybe.”

Tony looks away, his face heating.

Eventually, Steve confronts him about it.

They’re on the couch, right after what wasn’t exactly a date, but also wasn’t definitely not a date either—Steve had said he was hungry, and Tony had asked if he wanted to get dinner, but then Steve said “sure, there’s pasta in the fridge”, and they had ended up eating in the living room, plates full of large portions of heated up pasta from lunch (which, against all odds, tasted really good).

Now they’re on the same couch, bodies lax and full of carbs, and sitting pretty close to each other already, although Tony does take advantage of any opportunity to slip a little closer. They’re watching as Steve scrolls through a series of images on his phone, all historical pictures or paintings with a photoshopped, photobombing squirrel.

Tony chuckles, because he barely remembers this one, and because Steve seems happy and relaxed and this makes it easier for him to laugh.

“How come you don’t know any of these things?” Steve asks with a raised eyebrow. “You work with tech.”

“Machines don’t make memes,” Tony says. Then, after a second, he adds: “At least not good ones.”

“Your profile is one of the most followed of all time on Twitter and Instagram,” Steve counters.

“Wow, okay—cyber-stalking much?” Tony replies, which makes Steve’s cheeks grow a little pink, but he doesn’t seem too embarrassed, just a little shy as he opens a small smile. Tony takes the opportunity to nest a little closer.

“I was just looking,” Steve says, his eyes landing on the point of contact between his and Tony’s shoulders. They’re so close now they’re basically leaning against each other, and Tony is about to retreat and mumble an excuse to leave and save himself the embarrassment, when Steve adds: “It’s nice. That—that you don’t mind me sharing things.” Then, to Tony’s bafflement, he comes closer and leans his head on Tony’s shoulder. “There’s so much to catch up on. Sometimes it’s nice to—to feel like I’m in the loop for a change.”

There’s a knot in Tony’s throat, and yet his body is reeling, completely taken by the warmth of Steve’s frame cuddled up against him.

There must be something in Steve’s eyes, too – something more than what his words say, something brighter and warmer that’s almost blinding as he stares at Tony, something that makes Tony confident enough to lean forward and press a kiss on the top of Steve’s head.

“No problem,” he muffles against Steve’s hair.

Steve hums pleasantly and then asks Tony if he’s seen the world’s fastest skateboarding bulldog yet.

Of course, Tony hasn’t.

#stony #stevetony #superhusbands #stony fic #happy steve bingo #reblogs are love

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asteraegis · 4 years

Text

another fucking stupid ass smut

so like this one is fryeway too because, in case you were wondering why i write them more often, it’s really easy to write about two people that behave exactly the same way you do, which is why, as a lesbian, i am hoping for a female character like them some day so i can at least have more fun with writing erotica for the women from this series. so the tags on this one are mainly: mlm, Frotting, Rimming, Fisting, Praising, Slapping, Spitting, Spanking, Gagging, Choking, Biting, Sub/Dom, top!Jacob, bottom!Edward (obviously lmao). it does have a name as do the other smuts now, but this is tumblr so it doesnt really matter but if you’re interested it’s Lap Dog. find the other shit ive written via my deviantart page in my bio

“Let me in! C’mon, open the door!” Edward Kenway shouted, pounding on the door outside of the Fryes’ apartment. A surprise thunderstorm had caught him off guard on his way home and was currently drenching the poor man like a drowned gutter rat. “Jaysus, please open the damn door!”

Edward heard a click as Jacob Frye unlocked his door. “Edward—"

Kenway shoved past him, kicking his shoes off while Jacob closed the rain outside. “Thank god you were home, mate. I hate to ask, but can I stay here for the night?”

Jacob blinked in confusion. “Uh, yeah, sure. Here, lemme get you a towel and something to wear.”

“Anything but jeans, Jake, you know I won’t fit yours,” he called after the brunette, shivering in the living room.

Jacob waved his hand in acknowledgement. “Yeah, yeah, you and your motherly hips. You best fit my sweatpants, Eddie, or else you’re wearing Evie’s bathrobe.”

“Gross, Jake.”

“Hey, she’s gone for the week, she’d never know.”

Jacob returned with the things he promised, handing them to his friend. Edward motioned for Jacob to turn around, which he did reluctantly. He then peeled off his soaking wet pants, boxer briefs, and shirt afore drying himself off with the towel from earlier and then pulled on Jacob's offered clothes. The t-shirt rested quite loose on Edward despite definitely being one Jacob stole from him; he must have taken it a while ago. The sweatpants, however, clung to Edward's damp thighs and rear more than he'd like, especially seeing as he had no underwear now. There were also several small tears in the pants, a trend among Frye's clothes. When Jacob turned around, he practically ate Edward alive with his eyes, glued to his trousers.

"Damn, my jeans really wouldn't have fit you, huh?" he laughed, Edward tugging at the fabric. "Ya know what, you can keep those. I think they look great on you, Eddie."

Edward grimaced, making Jacob laugh again, scooping up his sopping wet pile of clothes and tossing them in the dryer.

"You got a sewing kit or something? The holes on these pants are driving me mad, mate," the blonde asked from the other room, still tugging at the fabric to keep it from clinging to his skin.

"Yeah, Evie bought one a while back," Jacob knocked a few things on the shelf above him out of the way then grabbed a tiny plastic container, tossing it to him when he walked back into the den. "Here ya go, Ed."

"Thanks."

Edward sat on the couch, carefully trying not to stab himself in the leg with the needle while sewing up the old sweats. As he was finishing up the last hole, Jacob flopped down next to him holding a hefty mix of shirts and pants.

He shone Edward a puppy dog gaze. "Hey... while you're here and able to fix things... do you mind...?"

Edward scowled at him. "Really?"

"Please? I did manage to find you clothes to wear," he pleaded.

The corsair rolled his eyes, pulling the needle through and knotting the string to secure the last stitch. "Fine."

Jacob was beaming. "Ah, thanks, Eddie, you're the best!"

Edward sighed, stitching each item's tear while Jacob sprawled out with his head on Kenway's lap, scrolling through his phone.

After about ten minutes, Edward plopped the clothes onto Jacob's chest and huffed. "There, anything else you need me to do, you man-child?"

"Yeah, actually, can you make dinner please?" he replied, sitting up and setting the clothes on the coffee table.

"Are you shitting me, mate?"

"Pretty please? I'll clean the dishes afterwards."

Edward grumbled but nevertheless stood up. "Fine, but only because I'm hungry too and I know you can't cook for shit."

Jacob made a happy squeal then leapt to his feet, chanting praises behind Edward as he groggily shuffled into the kitchen. There, the blonde looked over the odd assortment of foods. The Frye twins lived like they were in a college dorm and could only make what could go in the microwave. He shook his head and opened the freezer, finding a frozen pizza haphazardly stuffed into the icebox. Edward took it out and shrugged, figuring it would do to satiate both of them, then turned on the oven.

Jacob sat at the table already, chatting up the weary-faced Edward while he put the pizza in to bake. He didn't listen to a word Jacob said, just stared at him with frustration while thinking that, even with how awful a cook Frye was, even he could follow the directions on how to bake a frozen meal. He was sure at this point Jacob was either just being lazy or genuinely had no idea what food was in his own home, though Edward assumed it was likely a mix of both predicaments.

When the timer buzzed, Edward pulled the pizza out of the oven onto a tray then cut it, feeling Jacob's wolfish gaze on the back of his neck. Knowing he wasn't going to bother getting his own food, Edward took Jacob a serving along with a plate of his own and sat across from him at the table.

"Thank you, Eddie, where would I be without you?" he said with a cheeky grin.

"Probably still out in the living room," Edward huffed.

“Yeah, and without me you’d still be outside.”

The two ate in relative silence, Edward scrolling through his phone to show Jacob he wasn't interested in any small talk. He finished before the brunette so he slid him his plate and kept looking at his screen. Jacob picked up the tableware and tray the pizza used to be on and scrubbed them down at the sink, setting them over a towel to dry on the counter, then returned to his seat at the table. Edward barely glanced at him so Jacob frowned, knowing Edward had caught on to his scheme of pretend incompetence.

"I finished the dishes; do you want to watch a movie or something?"

"It's still thundering, mate, power might blow."

"Okay... Do you want to—"

"No, not particularly, Jake."

Jacob squinted at Edward, seeing that yes, in fact, he was mad at him for making him do so much. He sighed, figuring he needed to show his friend he was truly thankful.

"So, Ed—"

"No."

Jacob kicked Edward under the table. "Ya know, even after being so nice earlier you still are an arsehole, Eddie."

"Yeah, I am, thanks," he replied, kicking Jacob back harder.

"I wasn't praising you," Jacob muttered, kicking him again.

Edward set his phone down and glared at him. "Kick me one more fucking time," Jacob sat still and the corsair nodded. "That's what I thought."

As soon as Edward picked his phone back up, Jacob smirked and kicked him in the knee.

"That's fucking it, mate!" Edward slapped his phone down then shoved himself away from the table.

Jacob hopped to his feet, excited that the pair were finally doing something. He backed into the living room as Edward charged at him, tackling Jacob to the ground and pinning his arms down under his knees. Edward then grabbed Jacob's throat with both hands, tucking his fingers deep under Frye's jaw.

"I fixed your goddamn clothes, I cooked you a fucking meal, and now what? You want me to entertain you?" Edward shouted at him.

Jacob coughed as he laughed, straining himself to choke back, "C-considering I gave you shel-shelter and clothes, yeah, Eddie, I-I do, and it seems I'm get-getting my way right now."

Edward groaned, removing his right hand from Jacob's neck and backhanding him. "Goddammit would you just shut the hell up, Jake?"

Jacob snickered under Edward, slowly turning his head back to face him. "D-damn, Ed, you h-hit hard."

Edward moved his hands to hold down Jacob's wrists, leaning into him so their faces were closer. "What the fuck is it gonna take to keep you quiet?!"

Jacob grunted as Edward pressed his thumbs into his wrists' centers and buried his nails in his forearms. "You could try slapping me again."

Edward shook his head. "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

"I would, actually—" As Jacob was replying with another snarky remark, Edward rolled his eyes and spit on his face. "Ew! What the fuck, Edward?!"

Kenway flashed a smug grin at him as he started kicking his legs and protesting. "Keep talking and I'm aiming for your mouth next time, mate."

The two glared at each other for a short minute, both breathing heavy with irritation. Jacob snarled then began writhing around, Edward having to shove harder at his wrists to keep Jacob planted to the floor. The brunette thrusted his hips upwards in an attempt to buck Edward off him, successfully throwing the lighter man off balance. Jacob slid out from under him and with haste clambered onto Edward's back to hold him down. With one hand he grabbed a fistful of blonde hair and with the other he wiped Edward's saliva off his cheek.

"Nasty cunt," Jacob growled, tugging Edward's head back to look up at him.

The blonde squirmed under him, trying to kick his way free. "Get off me, Jacob!"

"Well, I might have done that if you hadn't spat on me!" Jacob's eyes glinted with a fiendish plan. Edward instantly caught on and began wriggling more, but to no avail. With both of his hands clutching his face, Jacob held Edward still long enough to return the favor, spitting onto his nose. "See? How do you like it?"

Edward whined as his face was shoved against the carpet. "Okay, fine! I'm sorry I spat on you, but I think we're even now, mate! Please, get the hell off me!"

Jacob shook his head, petting his fingers through Edward's hair. "Tsk, tsk, I don't think so. I think you need to prove to me you're worth respecting again after that."

"What?! Jake, get off—"

Jacob wrenched Edward's head back, giving him mild whiplash and making the man whimper. "I recommend you stop struggling and that you keep quiet, my dear sailor," He stood up to move to the couch, pulling Edward along with him. Sitting on the loveseat now, he still held the blonde tightly by the hair in his right hand while his left rested on his thigh. Edward winced as he was jerked down to kneel in front of Jacob and gaze up at him. "Can I get a 'yes sir?'"

"Fuck yo—"

Jacob slapped Edward across the face with the back of his left hand, making Kenway yelp and bite his tongue. "Can I get a 'yes sir?'"

Edward swallowed hard, then flicked his eyes up at Jacob's. "Yes... sir..."

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

Edward huffed then spit the blood from his tongue bite onto the floor. "Yes. Sir."

Jacob smiled. "Good boy. Now wait here, I'm going to get you some gifts."

Edward grudgingly sat still, both out of curiosity in what stunt Jacob was about to pull and out of worry that if he decided to run off Jacob would do far worse to him once he caught up. He didn't have to wait long as Frye soon returned holding a black travel bag. He resumed to his seat in front of Edward, rustling his hair as he walked by.

"Thank you for waiting, Eddie, you’re so loyal," he leered, unzipping the bag. He pulled out a collar, a leather leash and harness, a pair of metal handcuffs, and a ball gag. "Turn around and undress yourself. Slowly."

Edward nervously eyed the items as he stood up and began disrobing. Jacob laid back on the sofa, his stare engraving itself into Edward's body. Kenway finally kicked off the sweat pants and placed the clothes on the coffee table. Jacob scooted to the edge of his seat and pulled Edward by the hips toward him, grabbing his wrists and handcuffing them behind his back. He then ordered for Edward to kneel down, which he hesitated in doing, resulting in Jacob yanking Edward's hair and repeating his demand in a brusquer tone. Once he had lowered, Jacob latched the collar around him and tightened it so it would rest around Edward's throat like a choker. He clipped the leash onto it. Next, he fastened the leather harness around Edward's chest.

“Open your mouth,” Jacob demanded. Edward pressed his lips firmer together, resulting in Frye smacking the side of his head, making Edward’s ears ring for a moment. “I said open your fucking mouth.”

Edward did this time; the ball gag being pulled into place in the pirate's jaws and fixed firmly in place, the ball resting over his tongue.

He chuckled with satisfaction. "There we are, now bend over my lap."

Edward turned towards Jacob and did so, Jacob's knees pressing uncomfortably into his ribcage.

"That's a good boy," Frye cooed, entwining his right hand's fingers around the leash so it was pulled taut. He slapped his left hand onto Edward's ass, causing him to yelp. “Aw, does it hurt when I smack you like this?”

Edward attempted to reply, but all he could muster was a weak moan past the gag.

Jacob snickered, spanking his friend again and receiving another cry in response. “I’m glad. Your little moans are cute.”

Edward whimpered as he smacked him again, his ears turning red at the sound of Jacob’s gruff laughter. He squeezed his ass in his palm, Edward’s skin turning pink where he had been hit. Jacob sat back against the couch, pulling Kenway up next to him by the leash. He shoved him down onto his back, pulling Edward’s legs up to swing over Jacob’s shoulders, much of Edward’s weight now pressing into the back of his neck.

The Englishman groped both of Edward’s thighs, situating himself in place with the privateer’s round ass at his chin. Jacob kissed down Edward’s inner thigh, stopping at the underside of his cheek and biting his flesh. His tongue trailed to his taint, licking down Edward in a circular motion. He kissed his rim, the blonde man squirming as the tongue slipped inside him. Drool dripped onto his chin and cheeks past the ball gag, his fingers curling into his palm as Jacob moved his thumb to massage Edward’s taint. He continued stroking his tongue about and inside Kenway, pressing his lips to him as well. Jacob pulled back from lapping at Edward, inserting his middle and index finger into him. Edward’s voice betrayed him, purring as the fingers slid up to Jacob’s knuckles. Jacob took note of this and grinned, sliding in his ring and pinky finger as well, getting a louder purr in reply. He tucked his thumb in, Edward’s moan far strident than the former, arching his back away from Jacob, his cock twitching while Frye gradually began to gently fist him. Jacob grabbed Edward’s harness with his free hand and laid friend across the couch, still prodding inside him. Edward whimpered in pain, his arms aching from the strain of laying on them and Jacob’s fist flexing inside him. Jacob’s free hand travelled up Edward’s chest, tracing over his stomach, rib cage, and toying with his nipple, pinching and pulling it. Edward groaned, his body tingling and toes curling.

Jacob leaned into Edward’s throat, letting his breath tease his skin. “Enjoying this, are you, my dear?” Edward mewled, his hips shaking as his cock quivered, his breath quickening. “I thought you might, naughty as you are.”

He bit Edward’s jaw causing a pained yelp. Jacob removed his fist from Edward’s rear, reaching around and unzipping his own jeans. Frye pressed his body against his skin, taking both their members in his hand and rubbing them against each other. Edward writhed about under him and grinded against Jacob, hoping he’d understand that he wanted his cock inside him already, enough with the teasing. The brunette trailed his tongue up Edward’s jaw line to his ear and nibbled him there too, then blew in his ear, making the gagged man squeal. Edward wrapped his legs around Jacob’s midsection and pulled him closer, Jacob having to prop himself up with both hands.

“Hungry little dog, aren’t you?” Jacob snickered, pressing himself against Edward’s ass. “Just so eager for me to be inside you again, hm?” He shoved one of his hands around Edward’s throat and immediately tightened his white-knuckled grip, Edward’s eyes watering. “Put your legs down, welcher,” Edward did as he was told, receiving a congratulatory pat on the cheek. “Good boy.”

Jacob flipped Edward over, shoving his face in the couch’s cushions, the slobber from the ball gag wiping over the fabric. He propped his weight up by holding the back of Kenway’s neck, his other hand guiding his cock at last inside him. He thrusted in calmly, to further tease Edward, who grinded his ass against his pelvis.

Jacob laughed and tautened his grip on his neck. “All right, fine, but only since you’ve been behaving so well, my sweet sailor.”

He bucked his hips, picking up his pace progressively until he reached a speed in which Edward was crying out almost nonstop. Edward was short of breath with his nose in the sofa and his eyes were clenched shut as he braced himself for each stroke. He found his tongue pressed to the ball gag, like he was a puppy nursing on its mother’s teat. Every now and then Jacob would fiercely slap Edward’s ass with his free hand which would make Edward groan deeply for the moment. A sudden thunder clap resonated through Frye’s apartment, startling Kenway and making him clench. Jacob bit his lip and pulled Edward’s head back by the hair.

“Trying to end it so soon, Eddie? But the fun’s just beginning!” he crowed, pushing his chest down to Edward’s back and biting his shoulder.

Edward gave a shrill cry as the teeth buried into his flesh. He tried to squirm out of the bite, but moving made him feel like his skin was about to tear open. He laid still, letting himself sink into the couch cushions while Jacob’s teeth sank into him. When he pulled back, deep marks were left in Edward’s skin, matching the bite on his thigh from earlier. He licked the wound as a small trace of blood from where his canines had dug themselves in dripped out. Edward’s skin stung at the touch of Jacob’s tongue to the cuts, whimpering as Jacob propped himself up higher to return to focusing on fucking Edward harder. As Edward began to reach climax, Jacob pulled out and spun Edward onto his back again, finishing the blonde off by rubbing his cock against his. Kenway’s stomach flexed as he came, white ropes striping him as he lay there trembling. Jacob tilted his head down, moving to a bent over position off the couch and licked Edward’s stomach clean, then moved to his head, running his left hand over his shaft while his right took off Edward’s gag. Immediately the pirate gasped and stretched his jaw, sore from it being forced open for so long. Jacob pulled at the leash to bring Edward upright, sliding onto his knees off the sofa, his face in front of Jacob’s pelvis.

“Open your mouth, sweetheart,” he whispered to him.

Edward listened, of course, sticking his tongue out and Jacob pressed the head of his cock to it, spraying into Edward’s throat. He closed his mouth and swallowed, then put his lips to Jacob’s dick and sucked him clean, his half-closed eyes sleepily gazing up at Jacob’s satisfied grin. After a moment, Frye shoved Edward back, tucking his cock into his pants and zipping them. He sat on the couch, Edward turning around on his knees to face him, and Jacob dragged him by the leash up next to him, his head resting on Jacob’s lap.

He ran his fingers through his yellow hair, Edward lightly breathing with his eyes shut. “You really are obedient, aren’t you, Eddie?”

Edward sighed. “… Shut up.”

Jacob chuckled and unclipped his collar, leash, and harness. He patted Edward’s cheek and motioned for him to flip over. He reached around at unlocked the handcuffs, noticing red indents from forcing Edward to lay on the cuffs across his wrists. He put the “gifts” away in their bag then tapped Edward on his lower back.

“I’m done, you can put clothes on now.”

Edward groaned but nevertheless stood up and began pulling the clothes back on. As his shirt was tugged into place, Jacob pulled Edward onto his lap, resting his chin on the shoulder he had bit. Edward winced from the sting, squirming slightly. Frye rubbed cheek against Edward’s neck, adjusting himself to plant kisses along his neck and jaw. He pushed Edward’s hair out of his way and tugged his head back by the pony tail to kiss him on the mouth, licking Edward’s lips. Edward opened his mouth and Jacob snuck his tongue under his, then drew back. Kenway bit Jacob’s lip until the skin tore, then forced Jacob down onto his back and laid on top of him, kissing Jacob more, holding his wrists down to keep his hands from wandering. After he got his full, he curled up in the crook of Jacob’s arm, sighing deeply.

A warm smile spread onto Jacob’s face, pulling a blanket off the back of the couch onto Edward and took a deep breath in. I suppose I’m sleeping in jeans tonight, he thought, laying one last kiss on Edward’s head and an arm around his side afore closing his eyes, feeling himself drift off with his friend.

#thanks for somehow making it through this if you read it #i know its fucked up just a little but hey thats what im into #fryeway #edward #jacob #i write #ac4 #acs #assassins creed but i dont really wanna tag it #i am planning on writing a sequel to my evandra fic from kassandra' perspective so #that may never happen but know im planning it #its 1:25am

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dvp95 · 5 years

Text

can’t breathe when you touch my sleeve - chapter 11

pairing: dan howell/phil lester

rating: e

warnings: none

tags: alternate universe, slow burn, fluff & humour, tiny bit of inner turmoil wrt sexuality but trust me it’s not that deep, deeper than anticipated but still not that deep y'all this is primarily silly, eventual smut, idiots in love

word count: 3,995 for this chapter (49,787 total)

summary: Dan keeps making a fool of himself in interviews, to the point where it’s basically a meme. Now he’s got to sit down for the better part of an hour and sell his show to the YouTuber he’d had a massive crush on when he was a teenager.

read from the beginning on ao3 or on tumblr!

read this chapter on ao3 or here!

The flat is dark but for the string lights over Phil's headboard and the candles on his nightstand. Phil's fingers are tracing patterns on Dan's chest, loopy circles and spirals that leave goosebumps in their wake. He's humming something familiar under his breath that Dan can't place and his eyes are half-lidded behind his glasses.

They're tangled up on Phil's bed, ostensibly getting ready to sleep, but Dan is struggling. He doesn't want to miss a single moment he's got left with Phil. He'd thrown on some boxers in concession of sharing space with a dog, and Phil has gotten completely dressed in Dan's pyjamas with muttered complaints about the cold. Dan already misses looking at his body, but he has to admit that he likes looking at this, too.

"Remind me again when you're leaving?"

Dan sighs, lightly tapping a line of freckles down Phil's arm and tangling their fingers together when he reaches them. "Sunday afternoon."

"Too soon," Phil says, quiet and light like he's trying to play off how much it sucks.

"Too soon," Dan agrees. "But I'll be back as soon as I can. And we can - I mean, I want to still, like. Date you. Even when I'm not here."

With a little hum of a noise, Phil blinks up at Dan. He looks a little perplexed. "Well, yeah," he says. "I'm just gonna remind you again that I introduced you to my parents. I wasn't planning on running off with the next local idiot who fawns all over me."

"I did not fawn," Dan protests, but his lips are twitching. He presses them to Phil's forehead to hide the movement. He didn't actually believe that Phil was thinking of this as something with a time limit, but it's nice to be reassured. They're quiet for a long moment, and then Dan has to ask the embarrassing question that's been plaguing him. "Are you, like. Are you my boyfriend?"

Phil laughs, not unkindly, and nuzzles into Dan's neck to press a kiss there. Dan can feel the curve of his smirk when the sensation makes Dan shiver.

"Yeah, Dan," says Phil, low and fond. "I'm your boyfriend."

"I'm just making sure," says Dan.

"You're so stupid," Phil says, pulling back from Dan's neck to grin up at him. His eyes are so bright that it almost aches to look at.

There really isn't a good argument for that. Dan shrugs, pulls Phil close enough that he can feel Phil's heartbeat. He buries his face in Phil's hair so that he doesn't have to watch Phil's expression change when he says, "Yeah. I told my brother about you, actually. Told him you were my boyfriend."

Phil chuckles. "I told my brother about you, too. Dunno why you're embarrassed about it."

"Yeah, but that's different," Dan mutters. "You talk to Martyn."

"I get that your family is," Phil says, pauses for a brief moment, "complicated, but I'm not bothered by them knowing about me."

"That's good," says Dan. "Because, er, I'm having lunch with my mum after the morning interviews tomorrow, and I thought - well, y'know."

A gentle hand in Dan's hair pulls him back from the cuddle so that Phil can look at him. His eyes flicker over Dan's face like they're looking for something. Whatever it is, he doesn't seem to find it.

Phil smiles indulgently, shaking his head a bit. "I actually don't know, Dan. I'm gonna need you to use your words. Because right now it sounds like you're inviting me to lunch with your mum. Which, to be clear, wouldn't be weird for me, since you've met mine, but I get the feeling it might be weird for you."

That hadn't been at all what Dan was asking. He thinks about it, though, wonders if if would be better or worse to have backup for this lunch.

Dan loves his mum. Their relationship is strained, distant, has got a heavy buildup of guilt and mistrust on both sides, but he loves her. He isn't sure he can bring Phil into that and explain it, not when he's met the wonderfully warm people who raised Phil.

"I was actually just asking if you'd be okay with me mentioning you, but how about," Dan says slowly, turning the idea over in his head. "We meet you at the park after lunch? I wanted to whine until she brought Colin, anyway, this gives me a good excuse."

"Colin?"

"My family dog," says Dan. "Don't make fun of his name, your dog's name is nerdy and a pun."

Phil laughs and kisses the tip of Dan's nose. "I wouldn't dream of it. I like animals with hilariously normal names."

"So, you'll come? You really don't have to."

"Sure, I just," Phil says and pulls a little face, like he doesn't want to voice whatever he's thinking. "Is she... one of the people reacting badly? Wanna know what I'm getting into, here."

"No, she's been great," Dan says quietly. "She might be weird, but she won't be... y'know."

"I do know."

The smile playing around Phil's lips makes Dan want to kiss him, so he does. He can't believe that he's just allowed to do that, can't believe he somehow stumbled into being the luckiest person alive.

Dan's done a lot of things over the past decade that he thinks would shock and awe his teenage self. He's met and worked with some pretty big names, gotten drunk with his costars at some pretty big events, and publicly made a fool of himself in some pretty big ways.

He thinks this would take the cake, though. Just the simple act of kissing his boyfriend in bed would have been more than teen Dan could have dreamed of. He'd wanted that, of course, in a pipe dream sort of way, like how he'd wanted to stop hurting his girlfriend, wanted to feel some kind of acceptance for who he was so terrified to be. But the world had been way too fucking scary for him to consider it outside of daydreams.

Not to mention the fact that the man he's kissing is AmazingPhil. Dan laughs, pulls back from Phil to grin at him.

"You know," he says, "I used to have the biggest fucking crush on you."

"Used to?" Phil teases, brushing his fingers over Dan's ribs to make him squirm and laugh harder.

"Shut the fuck up," Dan says fondly. "I mean, like, in 2007."

Phil blinks. He's a lot sleepier than Dan is, which Dan very generously attributes to how long it takes Phil to do simple math in his head. "Wait, you seriously had a crush on me when you were sixteen?"

"Maybe," says Dan.

"Oh, that's so cute," Phil coos. He gives Dan a smug little grin and rolls on top of him. Their limbs are so long and they're both so clumsy that Dan isn't surprised by Phil almost kneeing him in the balls in the process, but he's also so far gone that he barely cares. "And what would sixteen-year-old Dan think of all this?"

"He wouldn't believe it," Dan laughs, settling his hands on Phil's hips. "Like, literally, this would have never occurred to him as a possibility."

"Why not?" Phil teases, knocking their noses together gently. Dan gets the impression that he's more charmed than he's letting on with his dry voice. "You didn't wanna come to Summer in the City? Make an impression?"

That makes Dan honk a laugh right in Phil's face. Objectively, that's mortifying. Phil just snorts, though, so Dan decides not to worry about it on top of everything else he's constantly anxious about in Phil's presence. "The impression I would have made on you in 2007 or even, like, ten years ago, wouldn't have been anything good. You think I'm awkward now? You can only imagine what I was like before I had any kind of confidence."

"I'm sure it was very cute," says Phil. "I'd have added you on MySpace."

"I hate you," says Dan, not least because he'd sent Phil a friend request on MySpace. He is absolutely not going to bring that up, though.

"Yeah, sure seems like you do," says Phil, grinning.

Dan doesn't like the smug look on his face, so he takes Phil's glasses off and sets them aside, chuckling when he immediately starts to squint. "It's bedtime," he reminds Phil.

"Bedtime," Phil agrees, and he blinks a bunch before he laughs. "I can't see you. You gotta kiss me goodnight."

Definitely a request Dan can handle.

Once again, Dan finds himself staring at the ceiling of Phil's flat. He's got a snoring dog at his feet and a snoring man draped over him, and he should really be relaxed enough to drift off by now. He's comforted by the smell of Phil's sheets and the soft pattering of rain against the small windows, but it doesn't help get him any sleepier. It's frustrating. He's got interviews all morning - the last of the Isles leg before they get shipped off to the continent for another two weeks of the same circus - and he doesn't want to be cranky for them or have to apologise to another makeup artist for the dark circles under his eyes. He tries for a really long time to fall asleep before he gives up on it for the moment and reaches for his phone.

The familiar cycle of applications helps settle some of the restless energy that's thrumming under Dan's skin. The fingers of his right hand run over Phil's shoulders and through his hair, gentle and idle enough to avoid waking him, as he scrolls through different social media sites with his left thumb.

His feeds are busy enough, since it's not quite late enough to be considered unreasonable in Atlanta or Chicago and Los Angeles is fully awake, but none of it is really catching his attention. He likes a bunch of dog photos and gets lost in a Twitter moment on a topic he's never heard about before. Three different times, he almost buys something that's being advertised to him before he remembers that he already owns something similar to it.

Normally he'd put on some AmazingPhil videos to help him fall asleep, but that feels pretty weird to do when the man himself is literally drooling on his chest right now. Not to mention, he'd have to get up to find some headphones, and that would just defeat the purpose of staying in bed.

Dan spends twenty minutes drafting an email to his grandma, hindered by only using one thumb and his brain not being at full firing power as it is. It ends up saying more or less what he'd texted to his mum, only with an apology at the end. He doesn't know why he does that. He isn't sorry for who he is, or for not telling her, or for not believing in the god that might inform her reaction. He almost deletes the apology, actually, but the fact is that he is. He is sorry for all of those things.

He doesn't want to be. He wants to be unapologetic. But this is a woman who he's always respected and who is so vocal about supporting his career that he sometimes gets embarrassed by the statuses she posts about him on Facebook. This is also a woman who brought him to church for a good chunk of his life.

It's so vivid, even now. Getting his collar smoothed down by her dainty hands, his cheeks pinched by all her friends. The stifling, muggy air and hard pew under him in the summer.

Discomfort. Physical discomfort, as a child, and a deeper sort once he realised he didn't belong there. If he has to narrow it down, he's sorry that he might be giving her a different sort of discomfort in return.

He emails so that he can check for her response on his own time instead of panicking and shutting his phone off like he did with his mum, and then he goes into the app store to download some new, mindless games. Those entertain him for a while, the easy taps of his thumb giving him something to focus on that is not all the ways he's failed his family or the terrifying reality of what he might see in his mother's eyes tomorrow.

Today, he supposes. He'll be lucky to get a couple of hours at all.

In the end, he doesn't get any sleep. He wants to, because he knows he's going to be a zombie at work and at lunch, but maybe that's a good thing. He doesn't know what his mum is going to say, after all, doesn't know if she's going to try and defend his dad or talk about his reaction at all, so perhaps it's for the best that Dan feels everything a little more numbly than usual.

Dan turns off his alarm a split second after it rings, which is never a great feeling after a hard hit of insomnia. It's the final acknowledgement that sleep is not coming, no matter how much he tries to will it. He sighs and gently rolls Phil off of him. The way Phil grumbles and curls into his pillow, cuddling it to his chest, manages to get a weak smile out of Dan. He's just... cute. That's all there really is to it. Thor perks up when Dan gets out of bed, his ears all the way up, and Dan figures that it isn't the worst idea in the world to get some fresh air.

"You wanna go for a walk?" Dan whispers. He has to bite back a laugh at the way Thor reacts - spinning excitedly in a circle on the bed before hopping down and running to the door.

The sun is just starting to rise, giving Dan enough light to avoid injuring himself as he finds something to throw on for the walk. He ends up with his own pyjama pants and some graphic tee or other of Phil's because he can't be bothered to look for something else. He figures that anyone else awake right now won't judge him for it.

He remembers to grab keys and doggy bags before he tries to get Thor out of the door without his excitement turning into barking. He hasn't really barked much in Dan's presence, but he doesn't want to take any chances. It would be just his luck to wake everyone in the building up because he has no idea what he's doing when it comes to training a dog. The dog his family had when he was growing up was cute, but he was real bad at being a dog. Dan's got absolutely no practice with making dogs listen to him, and he's not exactly assertive. He's been chased by chickens more than once.

The chill of the dawn air makes Dan glad he grabbed one of Phil's countless denim jackets, and he pauses on the pavement outside for only a brief moment before Thor starts tugging him down the road. Thor knows the area, even if Dan doesn't, so he's happy to let the dog guide them with his nose and stubby little legs.

It's too early to talk to anyone, for sure, but Dan wants to rip the band-aid off before he has to shift into his public persona. He texts his mum with one hand, can u bring colin please i miss him so much and ive got a friend for him, attaches a cute photo of Thor sniffing at a neighbour's flower box. After a moment's thought, he sends the photo to Phil as well. He'd watched Phil put his phone on silent before they got into bed, so he isn't worried about waking him up. Dan has to slip his phone back into his pocket to quietly scold Thor for eating someone else's petunias and scurry away from the scene of the crime.

Everything feels just a little hazy with the rising sun, the mist of barely-there rain, and Dan's own lack of sleep. He lets Thor guide him into a lazy walk around the block and breathes in the polluted air like it's going to make everything better.

Maybe it should be scary how right this feels. In fact, it is scary, and Dan would like to blame it entirely on his insomnia and idiocy, but he knows it's more than that. He wants this to be his routine, as stupid as that is. He doesn't want that right away, doesn't want to leave Atlanta and come right to Phil's flat, but he wants... that. Eventually. First, he wants a drawer in one of Phil's dressers, wants to text whenever he's outside, wants to meet Phil at the dog park with two coffees and a grin on his face.

Dan never really took himself for a hopeless romantic, but then again, he also never thought that he'd be able to date someone he wanted to be with for the long haul. Even a medium haul had been off the table with the girls he's dated since his last actual relationship. It was always going to be missing something.

When Thor starts whining and tugging at the lead a bit harder, Dan smiles. "You wanna go home, cutie?" he murmurs, spotting the distinctive blue of Phil's front door. "Let's take you home."

The questions are the same every time. Not the exact same, no, but still the same. Every publication and media site wants to know the same shit about the show, and they don't even have all the answers.

"No, we haven't heard about a new season yet," Jaime is saying for the third time in one morning, with some kind of unending patience that Dan will never understand. "Trust me, the internet will know as soon as we know. Of course it would be nice to keep working - I don't think my character's storyline is anywhere near done!"

She laughs, but Dan can tell that it's forced. It's starting to take a strain on her, too, and he knows that they're all just waiting for something original to come up. Patrick has zoned out, pulling a Full Dan and staring off into space.

There aren't any pins for Dan to comment on this time, even if he'd wanted to. The morning has been slogging, not least since he'd left Phil still asleep in bed with a kiss to his sweet-smelling hair. Dan is so tired, but he knows they're all so tired. There's nothing for them to do but paste smiles on their faces and deflect spoilery questions while they count down the minutes to their free afternoon. Well, Jaime and Patrick have a free afternoon. Dan is going to have his hands full.

His mum had agreed to bring Colin happily and mooned over Thor's photo, but Dan has been perplexed by the fact that she didn't even ask whose dog it was. He wants to tell her, wants to be clear that he hasn't gone and got himself a big responsibility just yet, but there's a larger, pettier part of Dan that wants to keep Phil to himself until his mum is face to face with him. Dan wants to see if she has to school her expression, wants to know if this is an arms-length continuation of their relationship or the start of something rocky and healing.

Since Patrick is off in his own world, Dan tries his best to be present for this interview. He makes the interviewer laugh and tells stupid anecdotes to keep the attention off of everything Jaime won't say about her character arc.

It's a good thing he is paying attention, because Dan isn't sure how he'd have reacted if he'd been caught off guard by, "And as I'm sure you're aware, a lot of fans have been speculating about on-set romances. Is there any truth to those rumours or is that just some fun for the fans?"

Jaime snorts loudly. It's very unladylike. Dan is so, so fond of her.

"Uh, no," says Jaime. "I mean, if you're talking about between the three of us - which I have seen, the shipping isn't as quiet as y'all think it is - then, I'm sorry, but there's no way. I won't even act like there is to keep people guessing. I'm not going to date Daniel or Patrick for, like, twenty thousand reasons. If you want to talk about Tanner, though..."

She winks and trills her real laugh, which makes Dan laugh in turn. Jaime's crush on the man who plays Patrick's father is such an open secret that he's surprised more people don't ask her about it. Maybe they think it's a sensitive or uncomfortable subject, but Jaime's got no compunctions about loudly fancying someone who is both a decade older than her and married. The interviewer's laugh is a bit less genuine.

"Really?" he asks, sounding skeptical enough that Dan wonders if he ought to be offended. "And the two of you think the same? No chance?"

What? If they did want to be with Jaime, why the fuck would they say that in an interview right after she'd denounced them as romantic interests? Dan wonders if this guy understands that's an insane thing to expect, or if he's just trying to get a reaction out of them.

"Er, yeah," Dan says. He looks at his costars for backup. Jaime shrugs, and Patrick seems to have only just realised he's being spoken to and has the panic of 'what was just asked of me?' in his eyes that Dan is all too familiar with. He decides to word his answer clearly enough that he can help get Patrick up to speed as well. "I mean, like, we're all just good friends. I don't think any of us have any interest in more than that. And honestly, if we did disagree with Jaime, we wouldn't force our feelings on her anyway. That'd be fuc- I mean, that would be messed up."

He sees the glint of triumph in the interviewer's face and groans internally. Fuck, he should have stayed in bed.

"Interesting," he says, "that you've already thought about a situation where you have unrequited feelings for your on-screen girlfriend?"

Yeah, Dan thinks. Super interesting. He's kissed Jaime a thousand fucking times for the camera and it doesn't do anything for him, thanks ever so. He sighs and runs a hand through his straightened fringe so he doesn't slap himself in the face for opening this can of worms.

"Look, I get that a lot of fans want to know," Dan says, keeping his tone as light as possible. "The thing is that I'd like to keep my personal life private. I'm happy to tell you that it doesn't involve Jaime in any way, though."

"I'm fine with my personal life being public," Patrick deadpans. "There's nothing going on in it and that's how I like it. We're all equally pathetic that way, right?"

"Oi," Dan says, unable to hide his offense. The lack of sleep is really making his filter drop, and that's dangerous.

Jaime throws him a life vest before the interviewer can jump on his reaction, patting Dan's knee and saying, "You know, Patrick, some of us are pathetic in many more ways. Like, do you remember the time..."

And off she goes, weaving a story about Dan making an ass of himself. He interjects at all the right moments, laughs and groans in equal measure, covers his face when he starts to legitimately blush at the memory of an entire Starbucks thinking he'd gone insane.

He's comfortable with sharing that amount with his fans, he thinks. He's not dating Jaime, he never will be dating Jaime, and he's a private person. That's really all they need to know for now.

#can't breathe when you touch my sleeve #phan #phanfic #phanfiction #dnp fic #words words words

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franeridart · 6 years

Note

Hey! So sorry if you already answered this but what application and tablet do you use??

I use Easy Paint Tool SAI and a pretty old wacom intuos tablet! Both questions are answred in my faq, actually~

Anon said:You. You awesome person. You are my new fav artist. 💘💘💘

AW thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:I love your art and the style, it’s all so cute and it might give me a heart attack

He c k let’s hope not! Thank you so so much!!! ;^;

Anon said:hey, can ya do more tokage, pls

Sure, I mean to draw more 1B in the future anyway~

Anon said:nori is soo adorable!! I love your art and seromina so much and seeing them combined makes me mega happy!!! I gotta ask though, how are sero and mina as parents and how do they handle nori’s quirk?

They’re disasters as parents but they try their best and are always having fun - Nori adores them! In their house not a minutes goes by without someone laughing, they’re all super loud and cheerful always~ neither of them has any problem dealing with Nori’s quirk, Sero has spent a whole lifetime learning how to deal with sticky stuff and tape and glue so he knows all the tricks to save clothes and furniture from accidental quirk usage and so on, while Mina’s own quirk makes it easy to counter any glue that might end on her - the main thing actually is that the quirk itself was a surprise! Since Nori looks a lot like Mina, both she and Sero had expected her to have acid like Mina so when she started gluing herself around in places and walking along walls and stuff it was a surprise (they had expected to have to deal with the house being constantly half destroyed by acid though, so glue is nothing compared to that haha)

Anon said:Heyy I saw your twitter account and was wondering if you could link some of those “fics about them boys sharing a bed..“ I’ve been following you for a while now and absolutely love your work (: I hope you don’t mind lol. I need more kiribaku in my life gahaha ❤️ thanks !!

I didn’t really bookmark any and most were old things I had read in the past and spent time rereading lately, but the newest one I read is this one - honestly though at this point 99% of the fics set in the dorms have them sharing a bed, you just need to open ao3 and scroll down less than a page to find stuff lol

Anon said:If you’re not an Adventure Time fan this ask will make no sense to you (so skip it), but when I saw your drawing of Katsuki with a guitar, I immediately thought he was singing some edgy Marceline song, like the teasing-aggressive “I wanna bury you in the ground / I wanna bury you with my sound” (which he actually says at some point I think XD) or the romantic and melancholic “Slow Dance with You” and Eijirou M-E-L-T-S.

Not an AT fan, but the concept is adorable so I’m keeping the ask anyway

Anon said:Do you think you might draw more of your fantasy AU children while you’re playing with you’re new pencil tool? It would be neat if you did! Regardless, I’m grateful for anything you draw!

Yup! Can’t promise when it’ll happen but I love the fantasy AU and I love childhood friends AU, so the chances of me going back on it are pretty high!

Anon said:Are you going to draw Mako and Taiyou again? They are so wonderful.

YAH that’s definitely in the near future plans! Thank you for liking them!!

Anon said:I just…I love all your art. It’s so amazing you’re awesome

THANK YOU SO MUCH !!!! ;^;

Anon said:Stavo scorrendo il tuo blog e ho notato che hai risposto ad una domanda in italiano? Ho seriamente pensato fossi inglese tutto questo tempo! Amo seriamente i tuoi disegni, i tuoi oc sono meravigliosi e non vedo l'ora di scoprire più di loro.

AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH grazie infinite omfg ;^; specialmente per i miei oc, è sempre incredibile per me sapere che alla gente piacciono abbastanza da volerli vedere di più ;^;

Anon said:Hewwo! I’m a huge fan of your artwork!! I was wondering if you have any time could you draw some more of those dorm room scenarios?

Anon I’m sorry but I need you to be more specific, which dorm room scenarios are you talking about? Most of my comics at this point are set in the dorms hahaha

Anon said:I just noticed that on every artwork you sign “do not repost” and I hate it.I don’t hate that you do it, but the fact you NEED to do it. Artists all over the Internet say to not repost their art but people still do it…I hope this will stop someday Sorry for my english btw

Yeah well, I guess as long as people keep on following and giving notes to reposters that’s not really gonna change is it orz

Anon said:You should draw Present Mic x Aizawa *awkward finger guns*

Hell I really should, shouldn’t I

Anon said:my god im gay for your kiribaku like they’re so good aibdjsbsknwnx and i love the interactions between the bakusquad ahh keep being awesome :)

HECK THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!

Anon said:Honestly, this might be an odd question I don’t know, but would you ever consider putting your art together in a art book to sell? Cause to be honest, there’s not a piece by you that I don’t adore and I’ve seen some artist do things like that before so I didn’t know if that was something you’d consider. Maybe like all your BNHA pieces or something?

It’s not like I never considered it? It’s more like I dunno how worth all the work to figure out how to make it/where to print it and then to actually make it would be compared to the interest people would have in buying something they can have for free on my blog? It’s just doodles after all haha

Anon said:Would you be willing to draw a little lavi (dgm) doodle for me? Anything tiny, I just love him and your art!!!

I’m not doing requests right now, sorry, but soon enough the new chapter is coming out so I might draw him around then!!! I always fall in a serious dgm mood around the time of the chapter release haha

Anon said:More abuse of the ask function: 1- I love your art and have been for months. On top of that, it often feels cathartic, which is amazing to me. 2- I love how balanced you can make KiriBaku. You even manage to make me appreciate that overrated attention hogger that is Bakugou, you can handle him so much better than the author, because your character dynamics make so much more sense!! 3- I always, ALWAYS find myself reading through all your tags. They’re awesome. Thank you for everything.//Avevo finito lo spazio nell'ask precedente, so I’d only like to add that aside from cutie-smoochy (“It’s not about whether you break” and “I don’t need you” might be my favorite, and for what’s worth, I remember writing something exactly like the latter in the past), you also make mu burst into laughter. Like, the comic where Katsuki is about to out Eijirou on his red hair, I am still rolling. Kiri’s giant mouth is seriously hysterical XD

Thank you for the compliments!! I’m glad I can make you like a character and a relationship you’re not much of a fan of in the actual manga? ? ? Bakugou’s actually one of my favorite characters ever though so………. maybe……….don’t offend him and the way Horikoshi writes him while talking to me………….orz

Anon said:I am starved for Bakukamikiri stuff in this fandom……..But you got some good shit.

I’m!!! happy to be able to help there!!!! haha

Anon said:They mama Mitsuki art you drew 👏💯💖☺️💕👌 I love your art so much

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:Yessssss you have Twitter! It is boring at the beginning but then you’ll love it! I can’t wait to see you here and there! Now all my Bakushima favorite artist have one I can die of happiness!!

I’m!!!!!!!!!! Still trying to figure it out but!!!!!!!! For now it’s not that bad? Just!!! Very different from tumblr so I’ll need to get used to it first!!!!

Anon said:Omg do u shade jirous hair like its a heartbeat line? Dhdisbdisb thats so fuckibg good

THANK she actually has it in canon too, tho, so I can’t take credit for this!!!

Anon said:Im crying on how you draw kirishima’s soft hair

S O B I’m glad you like it!! ;^;

Anon said:Can I ask what your stance is on bakugo’s mom being abusive and sorry if you’ve answered this before

I love Mitsuki with my whole heart and while I don’t think she’s perfect I do think she’s loving and caring and trying her best and always looking out for what’s best for Bakugou 👍 no abuse anywhere, for me

Anon said:OMG I LOVE SEROMINA LOVE CHILD NORI

Thank you for liking her???? heck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:I wish I could use your art for my phone’s background ;^; You’re amazing! I love youuuuuuuuuu

No one’s stopping you from doing that, anon!!! Unless you don’t have a phone that allows you backgrounds, in which case ;-; thank you for liking my stuff that much tho!!

Anon said:Hey! I followed you way back when your main output was haikyuu!! comics and once you started putting out more bnha, i had to unf because i had no idea who everyone was rip. but now that ive finally had the chance to watch it i’m glad to come back and see how much you’ve improved!

HECK THANK YOU???? I’m glad you decided to come back????? oh man that’s super flattering !!!

Anon said:Yolo bakusquad bakubowl ?

I don’t really like the whole concept of [character]bowl, sorry!

Anon said:I absolutely adore your art style😍 every time I see your art it makes me happy:)

THANK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:Can you draw Hawks and Tokoyami together? You are rlly creative and amazing! So I believe you will produce sth. awesome!!!! (If you don’t want to draw Hawks, could you draw a Tokoyami fusion?)

I can draw that! I’m just waiting to know how tall Hawks is compared to him before doing that 👍 be patient pls relative heights are something I’m stupidly fussy about

Anon said:Burn the whole world to ashes for you? R U serius?! You always killing me dude. I ascended to the heaven of soft things. I N C R E D I B L E. Im sorry for the break down, i was without tumblr 2 months and the firts thing i do is go to your profile. Keep doing this plis im trully love it 😭💖

mAN I’m so glad you liked that one this much, drawing the boys being unreasonably soft with each other is my fav thing to do tbh !!!

Anon said:Omg I can totally imagine Nori and bakushima’s daughter being friends!!!

THEY ARE !!!!!!!

Anon said:Your seromina is amazing!!! I love that ship I feel like it is so underrated! Thank you for this blessed image!! 😭

No prob!! thank you for liking it!!!!!!! I’ve been in such a seromina mood lately, I might actually draw more soon enough!!

Anon said:Omg imagine a Tetsuwase love child. Something tells me they’d be adorable and one rather angry child, considering who their fathers are

I can see them as being quiet and grumpy………. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Anon said:Hey just wanted to tell you I love your art. It’s so soft and beautiful. My dad doesn’t ship any characters from the series, but he does like the series and he thinks your art and style are really pleasing. We were talking about how nicely you shade and that the style is well developed and lovely to look at. Thanks for making such great art that makes me smile and giving me and my dad yet another thing to bond over.

YO THAT’S SUCH A COOL THING TO HEAR!!!! Thank you to both you and your dad for liking my stuff????? h e c k !!!!!

Anon said:Thanks to you I started reading haikyuu.

I hope you’re enjoying it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#fran answers #so much chatter yo #hope I didn't miss anyone !!! <3 #anonymous

191 notes · View notes

hymn2000 · 5 years

Text

Hope I’ve Got Something To Lose - MCU AU fanfic - C20

Story overview: Peter has an accident, and Tony makes a drastic decision. In the midst of everything, a face from the past reappears - but Peter isn’t too sure about reconnecting after everything that’s happened.

Previous chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19

Part of my irondad and spiderson series.

Warnings/themes: injury, hospital stuff, hurt/comfort, mental health stuff, family stuff, corporal punishment, friendship

You can also find me on AO3

Random add-on: By some mad coincidence by way of my mix on youtube, I ending up listening to There’s A Kind Of Hush by The Carpenters while I wrote the Liz+Peter scene, so if you want a soundtrack for the end, there you have it

Chapter 20 - Me and You

Peter slept peacefully. He woke up in the morning feeling rested and content.

“So, was an argument all you needed to get all the nightmare stuff out of your system?” Liz asked at breakfast.

“Uhhh, I don’t really think that’s how it works” Peter said.

“You did sleep better last night though, didn’t you? Something must have helped”

“Yeah...” Peter looked over at Flo, who was talking to Tony over by the fridge. “I- uh... I slept in my parents bed last night”

He could feel himself turning red. Liz blinked a bit.

“Oh” she said.

“You think I’m a big baby, don’t you?”

“Oh yes, definitely” she smiled at him. “Well, if it helps, there’s nothing wrong with that. I just can’t imagine crawling in with mine”

“Mm. I never usually have nightmares if I’m next to people”

“When did you realise that one?”

“...Some time after the accident. I used to be able to sleep better during the day, too. Without the nightmares” Peter shook his head. “So, what do you want to do today?”

“Relax. Let’s spend the day by the sea. Didn’t your parents say we’re here for sea air? Let’s make the most of it while we can”

Somehow, they managed to while a full day away on the beach. It was hot, and they were happy enough splashing about in the sea and then lounging about reading afterwards. They had a few little breaks to go and get ice creams, and then up to the chippy for lunch later on.

Tony joined them some time in the afternoon, and they had a mad game of tag (Tony wisely spurned Flo’s suggestion of Stuck In The Mud). While they were running about, Tony couldn’t help imagining having a little toddler tottering about with them, and Loki joining in and giving the little kid the upper hand in every game. It was a dream that was starting to feel like a reality already. Tony was happy. He caught hold of Peter and kissed his neck and tickled his tummy, making the boy squeak and laugh and wriggle. Tony loved hearing him laugh, seeing him smile. Seeing him happy. That was the way he should always be.

“Can you believe this our fifth night here?” Peter said, sitting cross-legged on the bed while Tony got ready for bed.

“It’s gone so quickly” Tony said. “It’ll be sad to go home”

“Yeah, it will. I like it here. I’m getting used to it. I think the salty taste on my lips is permanent now. I like being by the sea”

“Me too, kiddo” he paused, looking at Loki and sighing sadly. “Poor daddy. He loves the sea too, and he’s basically missed out on half the holiday”

“He’ll be better tomorrow. He’ll be up and about, you’ll see”

“I hope so” Tony said, climbing into bed and pulling Peter close, tucking the covers round them. “You wore yourself out today”

“It was a pretty active day” Peter said. “It was good though”

“You’ve been fighting sleep since about half five. Time to settle down now, pet”

“Ok” Peter nodded, cuddling close. “Goodnight, dad”

“Goodnight, son”

Peter was right, to an extent. When he and the girls got back to the house the next evening, they found Loki sat in the kitchen with Tony, nursing a mug of tea.

“Daddy! You’re up!”

Loki put his mug down so his drink wouldn’t spill when Peter bounded over and jumped into his lap.

“Are you getting better now?” Peter asked, hugging him tight.

“I think so” Loki said, giving Peter a hug and kissing his cheek. “I’m getting there”

“Good” Peter said. “I want you to come out with us”

“Not today, pet. Maybe tomorrow, if I’m up to it”

Peter pouted, but didn’t push him. Loki picked his mug back up, taking a drink.

“What did you get up to today?”

“We’ve just been messing about on the beach, mostly, and looking in the shops again” Peter said, omitting the fact they’d also been climbing on the rocks.

“Ah, how lovely. You’ve been swimming, haven’t you?”

“Well. Paddling” Peter said. “But the waves were pretty big, so we got wet”

“I thought as much: I could taste the salt on you, and I can smell it, too”

“Is that a good thing?”

“It’s not a bad thing” Loki said, tipping the boy off his lap. “Go and spend some time with your friends”

“We’ve been together all day!” Peter protested. “Can’t I stay with you for a bit?”

“I love you, darling, but you’re too energetic for me right now. Run along”

Peter looked at Tony for help. Tony shrugged.

“Better do as you’re told, pet”

Flo pushed a postcard at Peter, and another one at Liz.

“Can you write on these?” she asked.

“What do you want us to write?” Peter asked.

“Anything. Just anything” Flo said. “Maybe... Write it as though I’m not here, and you’re sending it to me. Or something. I don’t know”

Peter and Liz looked at each other, and shrugged.

“Have you got a pen?”

They both had a think, and then set to writing. Liz looked at the picture of seals on her postcard.

Dear Flo,

It’s a shame we didn’t get to see any seals, considering all the signs saying to look out for them! Maybe it’s the wrong time of year - or maybe we’re just unlucky! It’s been fun hanging out with you this week. I can see why Peter likes you.. and Loki and Tony. I think I’ll miss you when I go back home. We’ll have to stay in touch!

Love from Liz xx

Peter looked at the picture of the seafront on his postcard.

Dear Flo,

Remember that text you sent me, promising salty kisses? Liar.

I’m joking; I don’t mind. Thanks for being here. It’s good being able to hang out with you in a completely different setting. I can’t believe that you’d never been to England before, when you grew up in so much money and went on holidays so often. Still, you’ve been now, so you can tick it off the list. Millie knows, but Macy’ll probably go mad when she finds out. You know what she’s like.

Lots of love, Peter xxx <3

Flo looked at Liz and Peter, talking quietly beside her, and Tony, scrolling on his tablet on the armchair.

“I’m tired” she said. “Is it ok if I have an early night?”

Tony looked up. “Sure. You don’t have to ask”

“Thank you” she gave Peter and Liz a hug, and then got up.

“Goodnight, Flo”

“Night, Peter” she paused by Tony’s chair, and then hugged him too.

Tony hugged her back. “Goodnight, Flopsy. See you in the morning”

Flo knocked on the master bedroom door, and pushed it open. Loki was just in his towel, having only just gotten out of the bath.

“Oh, it’s you” he said, sitting down on the bed. “Everything ok?”

“I was wondering if you’d do something for me”

Loki gestured to the space beside him on the bed, and she sat down obediently.

“What have you got there?”

Flo showed him the postcard and pen in her hands. “I’ve always bought lots of postcards on holiday, ever since I was a tiny girl”

“I’m a bit of a one for postcards, too” Loki said. “Back when Tony and I first got together, and I was still living with my brother, he used to send me postcards every time he went away, even if he was only gone for one night. I’ve still got them all in a shoe box somewhere. I buy my own everywhere I go now, too”

“That’s so cute” she looked at her hands, and the postcard. “Ever since I was tiny, whenever I went on holiday with my dad, he’d always take one of my postcards and write on it, even though we were both there together. He always put how old I was at the time on them. I’ve got them all in a photo album, and I like looking through them, seeing how the way he talked changed through the years. I like looking at them when I’m sad, because then I can remember all those good moments. Do you understand?”

“I do” Loki said. “I’ve never met your father. Is he nice?”

Flo nodded. “He’s lovely. You might like him. I think Tony definitely would. He’s an architect, and he loves the Stark Industry stuff, even though it’s outside of his remit”

“What about your mother?”

Flo was quiet for a moment. “She doesn’t like me much”

“What? Now, I’m sure that’s not true” Loki said. “Everyone likes you. Why wouldn’t she?”

“I’m not like her. I think that’s always annoyed her a bit. Dad said we never really got time to bond. She went away when I was little”

“I see”

“No you don’t” Flo looked at him. “She got cancer, when I was small. Too small to remember. She went away and lived with her parents. She took my sister, but left me with dad. It took her a long time to fight it. She didn’t come home until I was nearly five, but we used to visit. I was different from her even back then. She blamed my dad”

“Different how?”

“Well. I know it sounds silly, but different in how I dress, and the things I like. She didn’t like it when I showed up in frilly dresses and pink. She was always trying to put me in dungarees and little jeans and stuff, but I never liked it. It still annoys her now that I don’t wear that kind of thing. She’s always been a tomboy, as long as I can remember, and definitely before. She likes that, she wants me to be the same. But I like dresses... She doesn’t like my personality either”

“What’s not to like? You’re a lovely girl. And you certainly know how to keep people in order”

“I don’t think so” Flo said. “She says I’m too polite and timid. I think she always wanted feisty kids”

“What’s your sister like?”

“Well, she’s like my mothers mini-me. She’s older, she’s nearly thirty, so she doesn’t live with us anymore. I don’t see her very often, but we Skype. But she’s definitely way more like mother. I think she was my mothers vision, her dream child, and then I was... me”

Loki put an arm round her shoulders.

“I love my sister, but it’s annoying sometimes, because she can do no wrong, and I can do no right”

“Believe me, Flo, I know exactly what it’s like to live in someone’s shadow. Just count yourself lucky you’re not closer in age. My brother and I were constantly compared. In that mans eyes, I can still do no right. You learn not to care. Or at least, you learn not to care so much. You can’t really change what you like, and you can only change yourself to a certain extent. If I were you, I wouldn’t bother. Your father loves you, and sometimes one parent is enough”

“Are you and your mother close?”

“Well, we were. A long time ago. I haven’t seen her for years”

“Do you mind?”

“...Sometimes” he moved his arm and carefully took the postcard and pen from her. “Right, let’s see...”

Flo,

You’ve always been the best of the bunnies. It’s been good having you around. It’s been good seeing Peter with his friends. It’s endearing. You’ll understand that if you ever have children in your life in the future.

Sorry I haven’t been around much, but my flare-ups always chose their moments (always the bad ones), and there’s not much I can do about it. I hope you’ve enjoyed your little trip anyway.

As I always tell Peter; ‘Chin up. Stiff upper lip’

Loki x

Tony watched Peter and Liz over the top of his tablet. Their heads were resting against each other, and they were holding hands. Peter had his eyes on the screen, but Liz seemed a little distracted. Quietly, he stood up and left the room.

Loki wasn’t very happy about being woken up.

“What?!” he snapped.

“I want to talk to you”

Loki scowled and sat up reluctantly, reaching for his Lucozade. “What is it?”

“I want to talk about Peter... And about Flo and Liz. And Malaki”

Loki lowered the bottle. “What about them?”

“Well... I’m not sure how to say it”

“Just spit it out, Tony: I’m too tired for your riddles”

Tony sat next to him, taking his hand. “Should we put a stop to it?”

Despite his fatigue, Loki knew what he was getting at straight away. He sighed heavily.

“Tony, you were a rich slut once too”

“Uhh, rude. I was a playboy”

“Same thing, isn’t it?”

Tony scowled, and nodded reluctantly. “Peter’s not like me. Look, I think him and Liz are getting close. I see the way she looks at him. So that might happen. But then there’s Flo, and we both know that little thing. And then there’s... Malaki”

“You really don’t like Malaki, do you?” Loki said, unable to help noticing how Tony had spat the boys name.

“No, but I can’t really stop them from being friends, can I?”

“What is it about him that’s so bad?”

“You haven’t met him properly, and you haven’t heard the things I have” Tony said. “Let’s just say, there’s a specific reason you make a kid board when you live a twenty minute drive away from their school”

“You don’t think he’s good enough for our baby, do you?”

Tony gave him a look, which confirmed his assumption. “Anyway, that’s like, nearly three people that Peter’s letting lift his shirt, and-”

“Tony, that kid is not ready for sex. Take it from me, the man of experience in frigidity. Plus, you’ve seen him with Flo: that girl’s not likely to so much as bite his neck, let alone anything else”

“What about Liz?”

“I don’t know! I barely know the girl”

“I’m just a little worried. What if someone gets hurt?”

“What if no one does? Look, it’s just kissing. Each person knows he’s kissing other people, and if they had a problem with it, they’d back out, or at least say something about it”

“I’m still not sure”

“Tony, he’s not doing any harm. He’s just - I don’t know, exploring. Just back off and leave him to it. If he needs us, he’ll make it known”

Tony sighed. “Maybe you’re right”

“Just turn a blind eye”

“I’ve got another concern”

“About?”

“Malaki”

“I see. What is it?”

“Peter doesn’t speak to him”

Loki paused. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, as in the selective mutism thing? He can talk to the bunnies a bit, and he can talk to Flo completely, and Liz, for whatever reason. But Malaki? He’s never spoken a word to him, and I know that for a fact. What does that tell you?”

“Tony” Loki sighed. “We both know his mutism doesn’t make sense. There was a time he couldn’t even talk to Happy and Pepper, but he’s always been able to talk to some of your Avenger friends”

“Nat and Bruce and Thor, and Clint. He’s not met Wanda yet...” Tony sighed. “Ok, so he can usually talk on the home front nowadays, and he’s better in most situations. It’s just school and parties really, isn’t it?”

“Mostly. He’s come a long way. Maybe it’s just the school thing”

“But he sees Malaki outside of school too, and-”

“Tony, what exactly is it that you want me to do?” Loki interrupted. “Peter doesn’t understand what makes him mute, so how are we supposed to? Just leave it. We can’t wrap him in cotton wool all the time”

“You’re talking about the kid who slept in our bed last night because he was scared of having another nightmare”

Loki gave him a look, looked at the wall, and then back to Tony. “Can I go back to sleep now?”

Tony sighed and gave him a quick kiss. “Sure”

Once Peter was fast asleep, Tony carefully lifted him up and took him to his own room. He tucked him in carefully, and left him to rest.

Peter awoke with a gasp, his heart thudding. Tears sprung to his eyes, and he rolled over to go to his dad for comfort, only to find him gone. He sat up quickly, and realised where he was. He took a few deep breaths, and slipped off the bed, heading for his parents room. He tripped over a pair of shoes someone had left on the landing, and landed heavily on his hands and knees. While he was still getting over the shock of the fall, there was a creaking sound, and he froze.

“Peter?”

It was just Tony, awoken by the thud, coming to check. Peter looked up at him, and started crying properly.

“I had a bad dream-!”

Tony sighed, going over to the boy and lifting him into his arms.

“Come here, chonk” he said, holding him tight and carrying him back to the master bedroom.

“I woke up and you weren’t there”

“Shh, sh, I know. I’m sorry, chick. I thought you’d be ok in your own bed once you were asleep”

He set him down on the bed and climbed in beside him. Peter cuddled close, and Tony rubbed his back until he’d stopped crying.

“There now” Tony said once he’d gone quiet. “You’re ok. I’ve got you”

“I’m sorry..”

“I told you you shouldn’t’ve left him” Loki mumbled, making them both jump a bit.

“You’re awake!” Tony said.

“Cleverly observed” Loki held an arm out to Peter. “Come here, chick”

Peter moved over and let Loki pull him close against his chest. Tony sighed, and cuddled up with them. Loki opened one eye to look at him. He wrinkled his nose as Tony kissed him on it.

“Love you”

Loki sighed, resting a hand on Tony’s arm. “Love you too”

After another full day, incorporating another train trip and another look round all the shops, Peter, Liz, and Flo sat on a wooden landing stage, watching the water bubble through the cracks of the wood as the waves receded into the ocean.

“I don’t want to go home” Peter said, breaking the silence.

“This week has gone so quickly” Liz said.

“Tony did say it was only going to be a little trip” Flo said. She sighed. “I don’t want to go home either”

“Can’t you convince your dad to extend the trip?” Flo tried.

Peter shook his head. “He has to get back: he’s got a big press conference in a few days”

“What time are we leaving tomorrow?”

“I’m not sure. I’ll ask dad later”

“We’ll arrive earlier” Flo said. “New York is five hours ahead of here. So maybe we won’t have to leave too early”

Peter looked out at the sea, watching a cargo ship in the distance making its way across the horizon. He always hated the last evening of a trip: it was always so melancholy. He jumped as someone suddenly had their hands over his eyes.

“Guess who?” A familiar voice said.

Peter wriggled away and twisted round to see. “Dad! You made it!”

Loki sat down, pulling the boy onto his lap. “I said I would”

“Where’s other dad?”

“Buying me an ice cream. He’ll be here in a minute”

Peter relaxed against Loki’s chest. “Do you know what time we’re leaving tomorrow?”

“Well, Tony said our flight isn’t until midday, but it’s a few hours drive to the airport, so probably around eight, half-eight”

“Ok, let me work this out” Peter said. “So, leave at eight, flight at twelve, nine hour flight...So we’ll get back at nine in the evening English time, so... four in the afternoon in New York time?”

Loki nodded. “Yes, that way we can drop you girls off at your respective residences before we go home”

“Can’t we leave later and have them stay the night at ours?”

Loki laughed slightly. “No, darling. You know what your dad’s like the first night back after a trip. Besides, I’m not one hundred per cent myself. It’s been a fight enough getting out here”

Peter sighed, resting his head back against Loki’s shoulder.

“That was a tragic little sound, chick”

“He doesn’t want to go home” Liz said, taking Peter’s hand. “None of us do”

“I take it you’ve enjoyed yourselves this week, then?” Tony said, appearing behind them.

“Oh yes, definitely” Flo said.

“Good” Tony said, squeezing in between her and Loki and handing Loki the Mr Whippy he held.

“Thanks, chick” Loki said, moving Peter a little so he could eat.

Peter peered up at him. “Two flakes?! No fair!”

“Hey, this is only my third ice cream of the week. I was expecting lots more, so I think I deserve two flakes as compensation”

Peter pouted, but nodded. “Yeah, ok, I’ll give you that”

“So, what happens tomorrow?” Liz said.

“Well, I want you to get the vast majority of your packing done tonight” Tony said. “That way we can get ready to go quickly in the morning. Get up, have breakfast, tidy and pack up the house, drive to the airport, get on the plane, probably sleep for most of the flight. Land, drop you girls off, go home, sleep. Or something like that”

“I want to stay” Flo said.

“I know, pet. I do too” Tony said. He noticed Liz. “Liz? What’s the matter?”

“I don’t want to go back. I’ll be going back to Oregon not long after we get back”

“I thought you were staying for ages!” Peter said.

“Well, we’ve been in New York for a while now. Mum texted me the other day saying we’ll be going back sooner than planned”

Despite himself, Peter’s eyes filled with tears.

“I don’t want you to go. Not now we’re friends”

“I’ll miss you too” Liz said. “We can stay in touch, though. I’ll make sure to give you my address, then we can write to each other too”

“Like those pen pals you see on Instagram?”

Liz smiled. “Definitely”

Flo, ever the organised one, finished packing first. She helped Liz finish, and then decided on an early night. Liz wasn’t ready to call it a night yet. She went downstairs first, where Tony was sorting out the kitchen while Loki sat on the unit drinking tea. They both looked up when she came into the kitchen.

“Hey Liz” Tony said. “You on your own?”

“Yeah, Flo’s gone to bed. She’s tired”

“Bless. Well, an early night is probably a good idea, even though we’re not leaving stupidly early, and we’ll have loads of time to sleep on the plane”

“I think she’s just ready to say goodbye to the holiday” Loki said.

“Where’s Peter?” Liz asked. “I thought he was down here”

“He’s in his room, pet” Tony said. “I think he’s feeling a bit sad. He might appreciate a bit of company”

Peter was packing halfheartedly, feeling very glum indeed. He managed to offer Liz a slight smile when she came into the room. She sat down shoulder-to-shoulder with him.

“How are you doing?”

“I’m sad”

“About leaving?”

Peter nodded. “And about you”

“You’ve still got Flo, and that boy. And those other girls. And probably a whole lot more besides” Liz said. “You’ll still have me, too. You’ve got my number, and I’ll write, like I said. All old-fashioned, like. We’ll see each other again some time”

“I hate it when good things end”

Liz put her arms round him, rubbing his arm firmly. Peter leant into her.

“I bet this isn’t what you expected when we bumped into each other on the street”

“No” Liz said. “It’s better”

Peter looked at her. Liz kissed him on the cheek. Peter stayed where he was. Liz slowly moved her hand, slipping it under his shirt and resting it on his tummy.

“Do these scars still hurt?”

“No. They’ve been healed for a while now...”

He could feel his face flushing. He liked the feel of her. He liked being close to her. She was looking into his eyes. They were close again. Very close. Peter’s heart was thudding. He knew this feeling. He knew what was going to happen. Liz kissed his cheek again, ever so gently. Peter put a hand on her arm, holding her tight, trying to calm his nerves. She kissed him again, just at the corner of his mouth. There was a pause, and she did it again. Peter let his eyes close. He wanted this. He could feel the heat of her, and he took a deep breath. This was it, finally. One more kiss to the corner of his mouth, and-

“Peter! Do you want a drink?”

Liz and Peter sprung apart at the voice, jumping when the door opened. Loki took one look at their flushed faces, and turned his head slightly, looking at them incredulously.

“Am I interrupting something?”

Liz and Peter shook their heads. Loki gave them a look which clearly said he didn’t believe them.

“Tea?” he said.

Peter nodded. “Sure...”

“Liz?”

Liz nodded. “Thanks...”

“Ok. Pop down in a minute or two”

He left, and Liz and Peter slowly looked at each other. They sighed and exchanged little sad smiles. It was the beach with Flo all over again. The moment had gone.

#my writing #fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #frostiron #irondad and spiderson #*does your mother know by abba starts playing*#three chapters in three days!! incredible!#I'm so proud

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