#Still an unapologetic asshole I guess

[bossbtch1]

Against All Odds part 2

The GIFs are not mine; credit goes to the respective artist/creator.

Summary : After the ‘incident’ on the gym with Bucky, now you had left with some unanswered questions about your relationship with him. You decided to confront him about it.

Pairing : Bucky Barnes x Reader (No mentions of body type or ethnicity other than the reader being female)

General tags : Slight smut and pure angst

TW: Strong language, Masturbation (f), Hurt, Heavy angst, Bucky an asshole

Word Count: 7k

A/N : Hey there! Guess who's back? This is the long-awaited Part 2. My apologies for the delay; I've revised the plot about three times to ensure its genuinely angsty. It's about to get tougher before it gets better! Get ready for the emotional rollercoaster!

Part 1 , Part 2 , Part 3

If you like my story, please go check out my other stories here

These are the aesthetic for part 2 (solely for visual representation of what going to happen on the story, this meant no representation for body type or ethnicity)

You were panicking as someone could see you in such state, strangely, Bucky seemed unfazed, his expression steady despite the unexpected interruption. Then, your heart skipped a beat as the doorknob turned.

The person outside attempted to open the door, but they couldn’t. Relief flooded you, thank God Bucky had locked the door. "Is someone in here? You know you can’t lock the door," the voice outside the room chastised, followed by insistent knocks.

"Fuck." Bucky muttered, frustration etched on his face. "Who's interrupting us now?" He released you from his embrace, standing up abruptly. "We need to leave." His hand found yours, offering support as he helped you to your feet.

Your legs felt wobbly, but Bucky steadied you as he handed over your clothes. "Here," he said, helping you slip into them. "Put these on."

Bucky was about to pulled up his pants, when he saw your panties in his hand. A mischievous smile formed on his lips. "Hold still."

Confused, you questioned, "What are you doing?"

He playfully stuffed your panties into his pocket. "I'm keeping these as a little souvenir."

"You can't just take those!" you protested, your face flushing with embarrassment.

Bucky simply shrugged, his expression unapologetic. "Sure, I can," he said, enjoying the playful banter despite the urgency of the situation.

Before you could retort, the voice from outside grew more impatient. "Hey! I can hear you in there. I'm coming in if you don't answer me," it warned, the threat clear in its tone.

Bucky's expression changed, growing serious as the sound of keys jiggling reached his ears. With a swift nod, you both understood it was time to make your escape.

"We have to go. Now." He said, ushering you towards the other exit, his arm protectively wrapping around you. "Just keep quiet."

You finished putting your clothes back on. Bucky held onto you as he walked across the room, looking for your shoes. You were about to put on your shoes, when you heard the same person call out. You could hear he was picking keys to opened the door.  

Bucky glanced over at the door. "He’s going see us. We should go."

But you halted his hasty retreat, pulling him back toward you. "Bucky, wait," you said, you blushed. "I don't think I can walk." You admitted.

He grinned, a look of pure male satisfaction on his face. "Here hop on," he turned his back to you. "I'll give you a piggyback ride."

"What? No, that's embarrassing." you protested, even though you really did need help walking.  You felt stupid for feeling so excited, but the thought of being carried by him, made your stomach flutter.

Bucky was persistent. "C'mon, I’ll carry you." he motioned for you to climb onto his back.

"Bucky... I don’t know...," You argued, blushing as you looked down at the ground.

"Oh, please." Bucky scoffed. "I can bench press 500 pounds without breaking a sweat. You weigh nothing to me." He reassured you, his arms outstretched as he bent down.

"Fine," you gave in. You wrapped your arms around his neck and hopped onto his back. Bucky hoisted you up, wrapping his hands underneath your thighs.  "This is kind of weird."

"You better hold on tight." He grabbed your shoes with him and went to the back door. "Ready?"

“Yeah.” You tightened your arms around him.

Then you remember, "Wait! I haven't got my phone. It's still on the floor." You protested.

Bucky groaned in exasperation. "You know, that's what's going to get us caught."

"Yes, but then they’ll know it was me in here. Turn around and grab my phone.” You ordered him. He did as you told him even though he wasn’t happy about it, gabbing your phone from the floor.

Bucky started walking towards the door. The sound of keys were being turned, it looked like he found the key. "Hurry, Buck!" You said to him.

"Don't worry, I'll get us out of here."

He pushed the door open and stepped out. You had made it halfway through the alleyway when you saw someone coming. "Shit, run."

Bucky bolted down the alley, with you holding onto him. You both were safe until you reached the elevator, and then you could relax. Once you inside the elevator, Bucky kept you perched on his back. He refused to let you go until the doors closed.

Are we good now?" you asked, your voice still tinged with the adrenaline from the escape.

"Yes," Bucky answered. "We're good now."

"You can put me down now, Bucky." You suggested.

"You sure?" He looked back at you. "You're not as heavy as I thought." 

"Gee, thanks," you muttered sarcastically, rolling your eyes at his attempt to lighten the mood.

He chuckled softly as he carefully lowered you to the ground. You reached up and felt how your hair had become all tangled. Your lips were swollen from his kisses. And you couldn't even begin to imagine what your eyes looked like.

"Thanks for the ride," you said, a weary smile gracing your lips as you recalled the unconventional piggyback escape.

"Anytime, doll," Bucky responded with a hint of amusement, his relief palpable.

You smoothed out your clothes and fixed your hair. You leaned against the wall, catching your breath.

"Hey," Bucky said, his voice softening as he placed a hand on your shoulder, his eyes searching yours. "Are you okay?"

You offered a reassuring smile. "Yeah, I'm fine." However, curiosity crept into your voice, "But earlier, when we were... interrupted. Who was it?"

Bucky hesitated before admitting, "No one, I was just messing with you."

A wave of relief washed over you upon hearing his words. You  stood next to each other, neither one of you saying a word. The air between you was heavy, but not uncomfortably so. You were glad you had finally slept with him. You had wanted it for a while now, but he was so hard to read.

You wondered what happened now. Would things be awkward between the two of you? Would he pretend like nothing happened?

You were about to break the silence when the elevator door slid open, interrupting your thoughts.

"After you," Bucky said, offering a gallant gesture, indicating for you to exit first.

"Thank you," you replied, stepping out of the elevator. Bucky followed you, and you both began your walk down the corridor in the direction of your room.

In the midst of the silence, Bucky took a deep breath, as if mustering the words he wanted to say. "Listen, Y/N."

You turned to him. "Yes?" you responded, ready for the conversation you knew was coming.

However, as Bucky was about to speak, Steve entered the compound, heading down the same hallway toward both of you. A twinge of frustration shot through you as you silently cursed Steve for his untimely intrusion, just when the conversation appeared ready to take a more serious turn.

You couldn't help but wonder, 'What is he doing here?' as your irritation simmered beneath the surface.

"Y/N, about—" Bucky started again, his words cut off as you held up a hand.

"Hold that thought," you interrupted him, your gaze fixated down the hall where Steve was approaching.

"What's wrong?"

"Steve's coming," you replied, your irritation evident. The interruption was untimely, and you couldn't help but feel a pang of annoyance at the universe's sense of timing.

Bucky followed your gaze, and his face fell as soon as he saw his friend. "Fuck," he cursed under his breath.

You both watched as Steve drew nearer, his pace slowing down as he approached you and Bucky. "Hi, Buck," Steve greeted his friend, patting him on the shoulder. His eyes narrowed in suspicion as he glanced over at you, then back at Bucky. “I thought you left hours ago."

"I did, but I had some stuff to take care of," Bucky replied swiftly, his expression unreadable. You sensed an immediate shift in Bucky's demeanor, a return to his cold, distant self in the presence of his friend.

You were about to question Steve's unexpected presence, considering he was supposed to be on a mission with the rest of the team. However, Bucky voiced the query before you could. "Has the mission ended? Where’s everyone?"

Steve nodded, his expression serious. "It hasn't, but I had to drop something off, and I'll be heading out again soon," he explained. "Mostly things had been wrapped up, just one last loose end."

"Alright, good to hear," Bucky said, acknowledging the update.

Steve's brows knitted together, his lips curving into a frown. "You look a little disheveled. What were you doing?" he asked, his suspicion evident in his tone.

"We were training," you chimed in, your voice steady, a lie slipping from your lips without hesitation. The lie rolled off your tongue with ease, and technically, it wasn't entirely false – you and Bucky had indeed been ‘sparring’ earlier.

"Oh, I see." Steve nodded, seeming satisfied with your explanation. "I'm glad you're getting some one-on-one time.”

"It was a pretty intense session," Bucky replied, his tone flat, his eyes avoiding Steve's scrutinizing gaze. You couldn't help but conceal a smile; indeed, it had been an incredibly intense workout, but not in the way Steve was imagining.

Steve raised an eyebrow, his curiosity piqued. "Well, alright. As long as it was a good workout," he said, his tone carrying a hint of suspicion, although he ultimately seemed to dismiss his concerns, not pressing further.

Steve then turned his attention to you, his expression laden with guilt. "Y/N, about the mission..." He hesitated, clearly burdened by a sense of responsibility, though you knew all too well there was nothing he could have done differently.

Your patience wore thin, not this again, you thought, feeling your mood sour. "It's okay, Steve," you said, your tone carrying a hint of annoyance. "I know it wasn't your fault."

Steve managed a smile, though the unease lingered in his eyes. "Thanks, but I still feel responsible."

"Drop it, Steve. It really wasn't your fault," you insisted, your tone firm.

Sensing the conversation wasn't going anywhere productive, you decided to retreat to your room, especially now that Bucky seemed to have reverted to his usual self and showed no intention of continuing the discussion you'd been having.

"Well, I guess I should get going. See ya later," you said, offering a half-hearted wave before making your exit. As you walked away, a sense of disappointment settled in your chest.

You could barely walk, your thighs aching as you began to walked away. Unbeknownst to you, Steve's eyes followed your limping form, "What the hell happened to her?" he wondered aloud, his concern evident. You blushed deeply, hastening your pace in an attempt to avoid further scrutiny.

Overhearing Steve's question, Bucky replied, his tone nonchalant, "Don't know."

Once you made it to your room, you sighed in relief as you closed the door behind you. You flopped down on the bed, burying your face in the pillow.

"I can't believe we just had sex in the gym," you mumbled to yourself, your voice muffled by the soft fabric of the pillow. Replaying the events in your head, you couldn't help but wonder about Bucky's behavior. "Why does he act differently around the team and then like this with me? What's his problem? Does he want me, or does he not want to be seen with me? Is he ashamed of me?"

You're worried that the whole "fuck and don't talk" thing is going to be the new thing. You couldn't help but wish it wouldn't happened in the future. It was great sex, but it would be even greater if there were actual feelings involved.

"What do I do?" You asked the pillow, knowing the inanimate object wouldn't respond. Exhausted from both the training session and your ‘sparring’ with Bucky was tiring you even more, you decided to take a nap, planning to contemplate your next steps once you had some rest.

The nap was short-lived when a soft knock echoed through the room. You rolled over in bed, and then you heard, "Y/N, are you asleep?" Wanda's gentle voice seeped through the door, causing you to frown as you sat up.

Recognizing it was Wanda, you got up from your bed and opened the door. "Oh, sorry, you were indeed asleep," she remarked, noticing your hair messed up. "I apologize for waking you up."

"I wanted your help," she said, her fingers fidgeting as she sat on the edge of your bed. "Vision's birthday is in two days," she explained, leaving you wondering how this concerned you. "And I want to give him something nice."

You let her finish, nodding in understanding. "I want to buy him this present, but I'm embarrassed," she whispered, her voice barely audible.

You furrowed your brow, trying to grasp her dilemma. "Embarrassed?" you prodded, waiting for her to elaborate.

"I've never been to a sex store, I've never bought... you know... that sort of thing before. I thought if you could help me, it would be a bit less awkward," Wanda confessed, her cheeks flushing with embarrassment.

You were taken aback by her request, feeling both bewildered and unsure how to respond. "A sex store?"

She blushed deeper, her words tumbling out in a rush, "Well, Vision and I have been experimenting, and we've tried a lot of things. There's something new I want to try-"

"Wait, wait, wait," you interrupted, raising your hand to stop her. "I don't want to know any details.” You put a hand on her shoulder. "What you do with Vis is your business, and I'm glad that you're both happy."

You continued, your confusion apparent, "Wanda, why are you asking me to help you? Why don't you ask Natasha?" You hesitated, admitting your own unease about the situation. The idea of going to a sex store was equally embarrassing to you.

"I trust you," Wanda said earnestly. "I love Natasha, but sometimes she's too wild, you know? She'd probably buy me something that would end up on the Pornhub." Her reasoning made sense, and you recalled Natasha's tendency to be overly candid about her sex life.

"Besides," she added, "Natasha's on a mission, and she won't be back in time. By the time she and Vision return, it'll be too late." Her plea was both desperate and hopeful, and you couldn't help but empathize with her situation.

"Why can't you just go alone?” You inquired, trying to grasp her hesitation.

"It’s too embarrassing.” Wanda admitted, her eyes dropping to her lap. "People recognize me, and I'm worried about what they'll say, what they'll think." She hesitated before continuing, "I mean, people don't recognize you."

Ouch that hurt, but you knew what she meant.

Wanda quickly realized her blunder. "Y/N, I'm so, so sorry. I-I didn't mean it like that. You had a mask with your costume, and your name is a secret, so... I'm just nervous. I'm sorry," she apologized, her tone filled with regret.

You chuckled, attempting to lighten the mood. "It's fine, I get what you mean," you reassured her, rubbing the back of your neck. "I don't like the idea of people recognizing me either."

There was a brief pause as you considered her request. "Um... I don't know, Wanda. It's not really my area," you said, hesitant about getting involved in such a personal matter.

"Please, Y/N. It would really mean a lot to me. I'm nervous about going by myself. I've never bought these kinds of things," Wanda pleaded.

You were about to decline her request when she dropped a bombshell. "I wasn't going to use this on you, but you leave me no choice," she said, her tone taking a sly turn.

"Uh, okay? What did you see?" you asked, frowning in confusion.

"You and Bucky," she smirked, her eyes twinkling mischievously. "I know all about the secret affair."

Your heart skipped a beat as you heard her words. Trying to maintain your composure, you feigned innocence. "What secret affair?" you responded, your cheeks burning with embarrassment.

Wanda continued to wear that knowing smirk. "I saw you and Bucky in the gym," she added, not letting you off the hook.

You swallowed hard, feeling your pulse quicken. "Oh, we were just sparring," you said, attempting to provide a reasonable explanation, though your voice sounded weaker than you had hoped.

Wanda gave you a look that said, 'Yeah, right.' "Sure, you were.” She continued to smirk, “If by mean sparring involving his tongue down your throat and his dick in you.”

Your eyes widened, and you stammered, "Wh-what?” Trying to play it off coolly, you added, “You must be mistaken. We didn't..."

Wanda chuckled, her amusement evident. “Don't lie to me. Bucky's eyes met mine." She teased, her playful demeanor breaking the tension in the room. She continued, "and you, my friend, looked so fucking hot."

You blushed harder, but you felt a bit proud, "Well, you can't blame me. Bucky's so hot and so damn sexy, he can make any girl go weak in the knees."

You shook your head, trying to clear your thoughts, focusing on the more pressing issue at hand. "But seriously, how did you see us? Why aren't you on the mission? But Bucky said no one else entered the gym today." A flicker of confusion crossed your face as you recalled the locked door. "How did you even get in?"

Wanda chuckled, her amusement undeniably genuine. "Relax, you're like a storm of questions. Let me break it down for you." She leaned in conspiratorially, her eyes glinting with mischief. "First, the mission? Turns out, I'm a bit too unpredictable for Tony's taste. He thinks my powers might mess up the plan. So, here I am, stuck in the compound."

You couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at Tony Stark's cautious approach. Your sympathy for her situation grew.

"And about the gym door," she continued, her tone casual, "well, that's where my power come in handy. I can open any door with a wave of my hand and step right in, undetected."

"I'm sorry," you said sincerely. "About the mission, I mean. I couldn't go either. Maybe that makes you feel a bit better."

Wanda offered you a warm and forgiving smile. "No need to apologize," she said, dismissing your apology with a wave of her hand. Leaning in closer, her tone took on a mischievous edge. "Now, let me continue," she said with a sly grin. "I was getting ready for my gym session earlier, and then I heard some interesting sounds coming from this room. I peeked in, saw you and Bucky having a heated argument, and I was about to step in."

You squirmed in your seat, mortified by her revelation.

Wanda continued with a sly grin, relishing the opportunity to tease you. "And then... he kissed you," she said, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper, "and I instantly knew things were about to get intense. It was quite the show by the way,"

Your face turned various shades of red as you tried to process her unexpected presence during such an intimate moment.

She chuckled, her tone playful. "But here's the kicker, after Bucky noticed me, he didn't bother slowing down. He kept on kissing into you, while he was looking at me. That's when I decided it was my cue to make a graceful exit.”  

You were taken aback by that revelation. "Wait so you only saw us kissing? You didn't see what happened next?" you asked.

Wanda raised an eyebrow and nodded. "That's right, just the kissing. But the way you were moaning, I had a pretty good idea of where things were headed."

You hid your face in your hands, unable to shake the embarrassment that had washed over you. "Wanda, you witch!" She was playing you so good. She was just guessing about it. If you played it cool, maybe you could salvage the situation. After all, Wanda didn't know the extent of your involvement with Bucky.

"What? Am I wrong?" she said, grinning slyly.

"Maybe?"

"Liar, I know I'm not." She said. “Now I know you fucked each other.” she concluded, raising an eyebrow mischievously, thoroughly enjoying the newfound power dynamic.

"Okay, we were caught in the act," you sighed, defeated. You blushed a little, "What are you going to do about it? Tell on us?"

"I'm not going to tell anyone about you lovebirds, if that's what you're worried about," Wanda assured, her expression surprisingly understanding, her eyes twinkling with amusement.

Your embarrassment surged again, "Lovebirds? We're not..." you began, attempting to deny any romantic involvement.

She cut you off with a knowing grin. "Oh, please. I've seen enough romantic tension to recognize it when I see it. And you two? Well, let's just say, your 'sparring session' was more intense than any training I've witnessed."

"But it was probably a one-time thing." You tried to sound nonchalant, but even you knew it was a stretch. "That's just physical attraction. Nothing more."

"Really?" Wanda gave you a skeptikal looks. "It looked like there was something more going on between the two of you than just fucking. I saw the way he looked at you when no one was looking. It was different. Like you were his. Like he didn't want anyone to touch you, and you were his and only his."

"Wanda, are you serious?"

She nodded, "Yes! I know there's something more between you and Bucky, and I also know you have feelings for him, too."

You hesitated for a moment before admitting, "I don't know... we haven't talked about it." You sighed, "I don't think he wants more than just sex, anyway."

Wanda gave you a confused look, "Are you serious? Did he tell you that?"

You shook your head slowly. "Well, no, not really. He hasn't mentioned anything, and it's not like we've had the chance to discuss our relationship."

"Well, I'm not supposed to tell you this. Bucky will kill me if he finds out, but I'm going to say it anyway," she confessed. You chuckled inwardly, the most powerful Avenger, being cautious of Bucky.

Intrigued, you leaned in closer, your curiosity piqued. "What's going on?"

Wanda continued, "He told me not to tell you that I saw you two kissing because he didn't want you to worry about it. And when I asked where you were, he said you were probably sleeping, and I should let you be."

"He said that?" You felt your heart swell. You could feel the butterflies in your stomach.

Wanda nodded, a knowing glint in her eyes. "Yes, and that's why I'm sure there's more to it. I can see it in his eyes. I know he has feelings for you."

"He does? How did you know?"

"Y/N, I know people. I can read his mind if you want, but that would be an invasion of his privacy," Wanda explained, her tone reassuring yet firm.

"Yeah, of course. I won't let you do that," you quickly responded, appreciating her respect for boundaries. "But thanks, Wanda. I appreciate you telling me."

"Now, let's go back to my problem.” she said, steering the conversation back to her original request. “Come on, Y/N, please help me go to the sex store.”

You hesitated, considering her request. Then an idea struck you. "How about we just order online?" you suggested. "That way, neither of us has to go near the place. We can discreetly make the purchase online."

"That does sound like a better plan," she nodded eagerly. Then, with a hint of desperation in her voice, she added, "But, please, make sure it's addressed to you and not me. I really don't want anyone to know I made that purchase," she implored.

You raised a valid concern. "What about me? People will still find out if it's shipped to me."

Wanda leaned in, her voice low and reassuring. "But they don’t know your real name, Y/N. No one knows except us and the Avengers."

You sighed, feeling a mixture of annoyance and reluctant agreement. "Fine," you conceded, rolling your eyes. "It will be addressed to me. But please, Wanda, promise me you will keep your mouth shut."

"Of course, Y/N, you can trust me. I won't breathe a word to anyone," Wanda assured you with a genuine sincerity. "Your secret's safe with me, I swear."

Relieved, you allowed a small smile. In response, she beamed, pulling you into a tight hug. "Thank you, Y/N! You're the best person ever!" she exclaimed, squeezing you with enthusiasm.

You chuckled awkwardly. "You're welcome, I guess." Returning the hug, you hoped that your decision wouldn't lead to unexpected complications.

She broke the hug, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "I'll send you the link later," she said, her tone tinged with excitement. Rising to her feet, she continued, "I'll leave you to rest now. You must be exhausted after your workout, aren't you?" She smirked knowingly, her gaze flickering towards the door, "And I bet Bucky play a big part on it too, didn't he?"

"Shut up." You grabbed a nearby pillow and playfully tossed it at her. She dodged it with a laugh before heading towards the door.

"Bye, Y/N," she called out, her voice fading as she exited the room.

Rolling your eyes, you couldn't help but smile at her audacious attitude. She was certainly something, and you knew this secret shopping mission of hers was bound to be an adventure.

You stepped into the shower to get rid of the smell of sweat. The water hit your back and you felt so relaxed, your hand trailed down between your legs, you thought about how good it felt to have his cock inside of you, how he fucked you in the gym.

You stepped on the shower to get ride of the smell of sweat and sex that Bucky left you with. When the cold water touched your skin, it brought you back to the real world.

"Ow! Ow! Shit, shit!" You said under the shower and quickly turned it into warm water. "I forgot how much this place is always cold." You whispered, and began washing your hair and body.

Now you felt relax as the water fell on your head and back. The memory of the moment that happened not even an hour ago played on your mind, like a movie. 'That's right doll, take my cock' and the sound of his low and raspy voice echoed on your head.

Your hand trailed down your body, and when you got to your pussy, you rubbed your clit. "Fuck" you hissed.

You could feel your arousal growing as you started fingering yourself. You leaned your head against the shower wall and moaned his name. You thought about how good it felt to have his mouth all over your neck and body.

The water was hot and steamy, but not enough to cover your moans. Your breathing was ragged and uneven. You imagined it was Bucky who was there with you, touching you. You closed your eyes and tried to recall every detail of the encounter.

Your fingers were now deep inside your pussy, pumping hard and fast. You could still feel his tongue on your clit, licking and sucking. You knew he liked to watch you squirm.

You could feel your orgasm building, the pressure in your stomach was getting stronger and stronger.  

"Cum for me, doll." He whispered in your ear.

"Bucky! Fuck!" You screamed. You arched your back, your eyes rolling back. Your whole body shook with pleasure, waves of pleasure coursed through your veins.

You stood under the shower and breathed deeply. You didn't want to move, the hot water felt nice against your skin. But eventually you got out, wrapped yourself in a towel, and walked to the mirror. "God, look at that" you said, examining your neck.

There was a hickey where Bucky had sucked on it, and another one on your chest. It was too obvious for the others to see, but you didn't mind. You enjoyed it, and the memory made you smile.

As you saw yourself smiling like a fool, you slapped your cheeks lightly, "No, Y/N. Get a hold of yourself. You are not doing this again." But you knew you wanted to do it again.

As you dressed and settled on the bed, your phone chimed, and you saw Wanda sent you a link. Tapping on the link and the site appeared on your phone. You saw a variety of different vibrators and dildos and other stuff.

You tapped on the vibrator and it was in different colors. Black, red, pink, purple, etc.

"Oh wow." you breathed, your eyes widening as you scrolled through the available choices. As you delved deeper into the product descriptions, your intrigue grew.

'Great for solo or partnered play, its shape is flexible so it can be inserted easily, the base is wide enough so it won't slip out and the curved end is made to hit your g-spot, this vibrator is the best and you can't go wrong with it, you will always get pleasure and will leave you satisfied.'

You scrolled through the page, your eyes widening at the sheer array of options. " Jesus Christ, there are so many," you muttered, marveling at the variety.

You didn't know what to pick. So, you decided to take a screenshot and sent it to Wanda.   "Wanda, I'm so confused. Which one should I pick?" You texted her. "What kind do you want? The purple one? Or the black and white one?"

Her response came swiftly. "Get both, also the lingerie. Oh, and make sure to get some lube, I need a lot for the toys," she texted back.

"Damn, Wanda, I didn’t know you were such a naughty girl," you mumbled to yourself, amused by her boldness.

"Ugh, gross, I’m going to need therapy after this," you quickly replied, feeling a mix of amusement and horror.

"And I need to bleach my eyes after seeing you two," she replied, her response laced with playful sarcasm.

You chuckled and continued browsing the website. "So much stuff. How can people use all these? Is this the kind of thing people use?" You whispered. You couldn't help but wonder which ones Bucky might enjoy.

There was this one that caught your attention. You clicked on the image, the vibrator popped open, and a description appeared. It was an eight-inch g-spot vibrator and anal vibrator with a remote control. It was a dual action toy that stimulated both the vagina and the anus.

'This 8 inch dual action toy is an ultra powerful vibrator that delivers powerful stimulation to both the vagina and the anus. The soft and silky material makes it a perfect beginner's toy, and its strong motor and wide bulbous tip makes it great for experienced users too.

With a curved end that will hit your g-spot and an insertable length of 8 inches, it's sure will give you a powerful sensation and will leave you screaming in pleasure. It also has a strong motor and 15 different speed and vibration patterns.

This toy is also waterproof, so you can enjoy it in the bath or the shower.'

Then you saw a video of a woman using it. The sounds were really loud and it sounded like it was being used for the first time. "How can she handle all that noise? It sounds like a jet taking off." You thought, watching the video.

Wanda's text jolted you back to reality. "Have you picked the items yet? I'm waiting," she inquired, her impatience coming through.

"Yeah, I already put them in the cart. I'm about to buy them."

"Okay, thank you! Good night!" she messaged, her excitement palpable.

"Good night," you responded.

Exhaustion began to weigh on you, your eyelids growing heavier by the moment. You were utterly spent, and as you settled into the comfort of your bed, sleep swiftly claimed you.

The next day, you woke up early, your throat was dry, scratchy, and sore. Part of it was Bucky's fault, he fucked your throat too rough hitting the back of your throat.

He's a beast.

You then recalled, ‘you loved choking on my cock huh?’ As Bucky's dirty words rang in your ear. You had to admit, that was the best blow job you've ever given. You didn't know why, but something about the fact that he was using your mouth for his own pleasure excited you. You found yourself wanting to please him.

"Fuck." You groaned, burying your face in the pillow, the darkness soothing your sore eyes.

You walked into the kitchen to get some water, you took the bottle of water from the fridge and drank it. You wondered if Bucky stayed to keep an eye on you and Wanda since now both of you were considered as a threat.

You still haven't discussed about what happened with Bucky. What's the relationship now? Were you just fuck buddies? Was that one-time thing? Or does he want more? Your heart raced at the thought of having more with him, you've never been in a relationship before, but with him? That sounds amazing.

After finishing your water and tossing the empty bottle into the trash, you decided to pay a visit to Bucky's room. However, when you arrived, you found his bed empty. Disappointment washed over you, and you wondered if he had been called away on a mission.

As you exited Bucky's room, you bumped into Wanda. "Morning, babe," she greeted you cheerfully.

"Hey, Wanda. Have you seen Bucky?" you inquired.

"Yeah, he's in the gym," she replied with a knowing smile.

"Great, thanks," you said, feeling a renewed sense of hope. You exchanged a few quick words with Wanda before she set off for the market to gather supplies for the day's meals, and you headed off to find Bucky. Wanda wished you luck before parting ways.

You went to the gym to see Bucky. When you reached there, the gym was empty, there was no one there.

“Bucky?” you called.

"Yeah?" His response came as he walked out, wearing only a towel. Despite the serious conversation on your mind, you couldn't help but steal a glance at the way his abs looked after the shower, water still dripping down his torso. "What's up? You good?" Bucky asked.

"Yeah, I'm okay.” You said, clearing your throat in an attempt to regain your composure. "Just wanted to talk."

"About?"

"Us," you said, meeting his eyes. "About what happened last night." He had an unreadable expression, the look on his face didn't make it seem like he was happy about this conversation.

Bucky let out a sigh, his face expressing a clear desire to avoid the topic. "Y/N, can we not? I'm not in the mood." He began putting on his clothes, his movements brisk and uneasy.  He clearly uncomfortable with the conversation at hand.  

But you couldn't let it go. The events of the previous night hung between you, an unspoken question begging for an answer. "No, Bucky, we can't just ignore it. I know things have been weird between us," you began, "What does it mean for us? I mean, is it going to happen again?"

He ran a hand through his damp hair, his jaw clenched. "Y/N, stop." He warned, his tone growing stern for you to drop the conversation.

You sighed, looking at him with sad eyes. "Why are you doing this? Why do you keep pushing me away?" You asked, your voice determined, refusing to let the matter rest.

"I don't want to talk about this." he hissed, his patience fraying as he continued to dress, his movements becoming more agitated. "I have important stuff to do right now, so no."

"I want to know why the fuck you're acting this way!" you snapped, getting frustrated with his behavior. "Stop being a dick and just tell me. Are we going to do this again or what? What does this mean for us, huh? Is it a one-time thing or something more?” you demanded, raising your voice.

"God damnit Y/N! Just fucking stop! What's wrong with you?!" He yelled, his frustration boiling over. "Just fucking leave.”

Your heart sank, but you refused to back down. "No, not until you explain what our relationship is now," you insisted, your voice steady, though your hands trembled with the intensity of your emotions.

His glare could have frozen hell over, his eyes radiating cold anger, "We are not in a relationship. We have nothing. Do you understand? Nothing." he stated bluntly, his gaze piercing through you as he threw his duffle bag to the floor in a fit of frustration, its contents spilling out.

The look in his eyes...there was no emotion there. Just the cold stare of someone who no longer cared, and it felt like a stab to the chest. "You want to talk? Fine. Let's fucking talk. We fucked, that's it. It was a fucking mistake.”

The impact of his words hit you like a bullet to the chest. You felt a lump form in your throat, choking back the surge of emotions threatening to overwhelm you. "What…?" holding his glare as you tried to mask the hurt in your expression. This was worse than any outcomes you had ever imagined.

"A mistake, Y/N. I shouldn't have done that. It was a bad idea. It happened because I was stressed and needed to release some steam." His voice growing colder, "it was the only thing that got my mind off of everything.”

The finality of his words sinking in. “It was a fucking mistake. You happened to be there and I happened to be horny. We fucked. End of the story. Nothing else. Now fucking leave."

You had expected this to be just a one-time thing, and you thought you could handle that. But what he said was far worse, leaving you feeling utterly devastated, the weight of his rejection crushing you.

 "I just happened to be there for you to fuck? To release your steam? You think of me that way?" You asked him.

He remained silent, refusing to look at you, his gaze fixed on the floor. Why were you still standing here, allowing him to strip away your dignity? Yet, a part of you desperately clung to the hope for an answer.

Every word carved a deeper wound into your heart, yet you pressed on. "No, I need an answer," you insisted, your voice growing more desperate. "Was it just sex?”

He met your question with a nonchalant shrug, his indifference cutting deeper than any rejection. "That's all it was. Yes."

"So, it meant nothing, I'm just another girl you fucked?" you asked, the pain in your voice evident as you tried to make sense of his words.

He continued to re-packing his bags, "What more do you want me to say, Y/N?" he retorted, his anger rising once again. "That I made a mistake? That I fucked up? That I regret it? There, happy? Or do you want to hear me tell you that I used you?"

Your heart broke into a million pieces as the truth of his words struck you like a hammer to the chest. You had given your heart to him, only for him to break it. You couldn't speak, could barely breath.

"It meant nothing to me, Y/N," he continued, his voice filled with disgust. "It was a moment of weakness, and it should never have happened."

You wanted to scream, to lash out, to strike him, but instead, you stood there in silence, unable to move. Bucky's words were like daggers, piercing your heart, leaving a deep wound that would never heal. You felt numb, the pain and betrayal too much for your body and mind to handle. You knew that you would never be the same, that a part of you would always be broken.

"I thought we had a connection." You asked, your voice small, the tremor betraying your vulnerability.

His response, devoid of any sympathy or remorse, struck like a knife to your heart. "Well, you were fucking wrong. You're a fucking mistake, Y/N. You should have known better than to expect anything from me. Now get the fuck out of my sight."

The finality of his words was a slap to your face, the sting of his rejection leaving a deep, jagged scar across your heart. You would never forget his words, or the way he looked at you, his eyes filled with hatred and disdain.

You couldn't comprehend why he was acting like this. Was this the real him? He was cold, emotionless, completely different from the person you thought you knew in the gym, making you question whether the person who had shared that passionate moment with you was real.

You should've known better. You shouldn’t listen to Wanda on the first place, her suggestion was ridiculous and it led to this mess. Your heart was broken, the pain was unbearable. You were alone.

You had no one.

But the rawness of the rejection stung. It was time to leave, to salvage what remained of your wounded pride and self-respect.

"Fuck you, Barnes.”

"You already did, sweetheart.” You saw a slight smirk, “Unless you want more, I can give you that. You have a body to die for.”

Fed up with his disrespectful attitude, you turned to leave, your hand gripping the doorknob. However, something compelled you to turn back and confront him. As you faced him again, you noticed his gaze lingering on you, catching a flicker of something in his eyes, perhaps regret? But then, his expression hardened once more returned to its cold, distant state.

Summoning your strength, you said, "You really know how to hurt people, Barnes."

Bucky's response was laced with bitterness and self-awareness, acknowledging the pain he had caused, "I know, I'm a master of it." He said without looking at you with expression that you couldn't quite read, as if he wanted to say something more. Yet, he remained silent.

The room grew quiet, a heavy silence settling between the two of you, neither one willing to speak first. After what felt like an eternity, you averted your gaze, your eyes glistening with unshed tears, and whispered your farewell. "Goodbye, Barnes." With that, you turned on your heel and walked out, the door slamming shut behind you, the sound echoing the finality of the moment.

As you left the gym, your steps heavy and your heart heavier, the weight of the emotional wounds settled in. Tears streamed down your cheeks as you made your way back to your room. There, behind a locked door, you allowed your emotions to spill out. You collapsed onto the bed, your sobs echoing in the room. You didn't know how long you cried, but it was enough time for your head to hurt. You wiped your tears, feeling the exhaustion set in.

Bucky was mean, he was really mean. You thought he had changed but apparently not. Not anyone was capable of changing. As you cried, you made a silent promise to yourself: you wouldn't let him hurt you again.

E/N : I apologize for leaving you hanging with another cliffhanger, but I didn't want to make Part 2 too lengthy and risk boring you. I acknowledge it might not be as good as Part 1, and for that, I apologize. Rest assured, I'll make it worth the wait in Part 3 (I promise)! On a positive note, who's excited for the groveling trope? I certainly am! Get ready for some intense moments! intense moments ahead!

All the sub-plot with Wanda will start to make sense in Part 3 as it intertwines, and you can expect some moments of jealousy and possessiveness from Bucky as well.

Don't forget to show your support by leaving likes and comments; I'd love to hear your thoughts! 😊📚

Taglist:

@vicmc624 @am-3-thyst @barnesandsteven @naeenae @rainy-day-lady @nouk1998 @cl7ire @oneofthedyingpoets @dnovastark @waywardhunter95

If you want to be added/removed, just let me know!

#bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes angst #marvel x reader

[jaays-moon]

ghostbusters👻☎

heeseung x reader (afab) genre: friends to lovers, conducting a seance, spooOooky, friends having fun!! synopsis: what is better than a sleepover after the dreadful exams? a game of calling ghosts at a sleepover! where y/n and her friends play the game of seance with candles. word count: 2.6K 🖤🖤 DISCLAIMER‼️ i do not intend make fun of the practice or anyone who believes in such things. this story is purely for entertainment. continue reading....༉‧₊˚🕯️🖤❀༉‧₊˚.

"dude we are still having the sleepover right?" hearing heeseung's voice over the phone was just the moral boost i needed to protect myself from the eventual bed rot.

"yeah... we do, don't we..." however, nothing could stop me from the self-loathing that ensued after our exam results were published.

"y/n are you still sad about your grades? dude... you literally topped the class. so what jay beat you to rank 1, you know that nerdball is always trying to one up you."

ha...was it that evident in my voice "no, haha no its... ugh you know what, yeah i am upset. LIKE HE LITERALLY TOLD ME HE DIDN'T DO WELL IN PHYSICS, BUT THAT HOE??? this is why i hate toppers."

"oh? is it so?"

JAY??? what- omg did hee just put me on a three way call??

"HEE?" what is this guy doing. gosh way to go. he sure does know how to put me on the spot!

"no bestie it is I. the topper. you know you should actually let me know how crude your true intent is. and here i thought you were a friend."

"oh well good cause i can't be friends with LIARS! i wasn't the one who pretended to not know about the exam and then proceed to get an A! that is actually being an asshole. also that you never told me about getting tutored by jake."

"wait what you were getting tutored by jake? is this how you steal peoples friends jay?"

"WHAT? NO I DIDN'T? THAT LIL SHIT HAS BEEN TELLING EVERYONE THAT? JAKE-"

*the line cuts and the doorbell rings*

who could that be?

"hee?" "yes? who else? its time for the sleepover girl?"

"its 7 o' clock in the evening heeseung, who comes this early anyways-" i mean how does it even matter to scold him cause either ways, he barges into the house.

"well technically i do live here. its like my second home. do you need to take permission to enter your own house love?" of course. the only reason why i am friends with hee. he is unapologetically himself. it puts me at ease to have a person who thinks of me so dearly. or thinks of my home so dearly...

"ok fyi i also sent the invite in the gc"

"oh i know, jay is on the way with jake, maybe after he beats him up tho."

i chuckle at the thought of those two bickering. obviously jake hadn't told me anything about tutoring. it was just fun to watch them bicker after all! "and for you, i also invited leah over." a wicked grin decorates my face as i watch hee's jaw drop and eyes go wide in horror.

"Y/N??? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO what? why? how could you do this to me? YOU ARE VERY AWARE OF HOW CLINGY SHE IS WITH ME. she is like obsessed with me or something! please no y/n. i am so sorry!! Y/N"

"hee be nice! she is my friend! and everyone has tiny crushes. she just likes you a bit. as the good friend that i am, i am just helping her out! she also has something planned for the night. she was recommending some game? i don't know."

*bell rings*

"i guess that must be the two actual friends of mine. the ones who TRULY care for me!" i chuckle as i approach the door.

however nobody stands as i open the door. i look outside to check my surroundings but it is as quiet as a night full of mysteries could be. the sudden noise of thunder fills the ambience as it starts pouring heavily. i shriek as i run back into the house, locking the door. "hee...?" i look over the kitchen counter, the sofa, and knock on the bathroom doors he doesn't respond. "ugh where did this kid go? hee, hees- AHHHHHH!

something black just covers my eyes from the back as a scream for my life. "geez, if you didn't know how to defend yourself, you sure can make a serial killer go deaf. you know you should audition for those roles of screamers in the slasher thrillers."

"HEESEUNG! NOT FUNNY. I WAS SO SCARED!" "aww pookie was scared" "ew-" but his warm hug makes up for it. as the cold from the rain starts creeping into the room, heeseung offers me his jacket.

"what about you?" "don't worry. you will be warm and smell nice in it." he adds on with a wink. this guy. my laughs cover how blown out my pupils look. it isn't fair. how he gets to have this effect on me. i mean we are friends but moments like these, make me question otherwise. why can't i reciprocate the flirtations? why am i defeated dumb by this gorgeous guy?

"ok leah justed texted me. jay is picking her up" "you text leah?" "sometimes, when i think my charm is wearing off." "you are such an asshole! i am going to tell her." "no you won't." "and why is that?" "cause you care about me. cause, you like me." a grin of victory. i wave my hand to dismiss the words thrown out in air. is it that simple for him?

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

our boisterous laugh fills my apartment. if it weren't for these people i genuinely wouldn't make it through college. but as we talk, as we laugh, heeseung keeps falling all over me.

"HEESEUNG WHY DO YOU HAVE A SERIOUS CASE OF IJBOLITIS YOU WILL SQUISH Y/N." jay's boisterous accusation fills the room when jake ends up becoming a water fountain spitting out the cola he was drinking. "omg y'all!! now i need to get tissues" shaking my head isn't enough for the amount of chaos these people cause.

was i saying something about them saving me throughout college? never mind that, it is in direct proportion to the headache they give me. stealing glance from hee i move towards the kitchen "y/n could you also get...um..five! yes five candles!" "candles? for what leah?" "remember?! i told you we have to play a game. i mean we are done watching a movie. it is raining outside. IT IS 3 AM! this is the perfect time to have a seance!" "ah what now?"

"a seance jake. wouldn't have expected you to know however." "please do explain jAy. wHat is a sEanCe"

"well you see in ancient times-"

"it is a ghost calling game!"

"it is NOT a game leahhh." wow... i have never seen jay pout?

"wellllllll none of us are mediums."

"what would you know baby i could be a medium?"

"BABY??" "BABY?" "you both-"

"what y/n? as if you aren't hiding something?! *giggling* you and hee... aren't you also dating? you may not tell your dear friend-"

"what? no no you have it wrong leah. y/n and i. i would never date her. we can never date. we are friends. right y/n? y/n-"

i rush to the kitchen as soon as possible. i have nothing to do with that conversation. i should have known. it was just heeseung being heeseung. he is just nice to everyone. it shouldn't mean anything that the way he looks at me is any different. it was just my perception. it was my fault i thought that heeseung could love me any more than a friend. it should have been me who answered that. of course. like he said we could never date. why would he date me. why would i date him. why am i hurt-

"y/n? why did you leave like that?"

as i feel my throat burning at the familiar sound. my eyes are about to spill the truth. "didn't leah ask to get the candles though? why are you worried." as i shove past him in my annoyance which almost turned into guilt. reaching up to open the cabinet heeseung comes closer, hovering over me to reach the matchbox. "y/n" oh i know that timbre of his voice. the low, soothing tone, prying to know if i am hurt. i am not. definitely. "what?" "i am supposed to ask you that. i know you have something on your mind. i mean i know you were trying to set me up with your friend-" oh. he wasn't even thinking about me. good lord. this is pathetic. i am pathetic. "no i wasn't worried about that. matter of fact i wasn't worried at all. first you three way call jay to "prank" me. and now you think i am unlovable. pick a side lee heeseung. do you even care or not."

"woah. government name... if i didn't know you better, i would say you are mad right now." "that is the point heeseung. you don't. know. me." "baby-" "DO NOT CALL ME THAT!" as i push him back to the kitchen island i feel his round eyes on me filled with concern and guilt. i am unable to pull him back before he bumps into the glass as it shatters to the floor.

"ayo? what happened-" jake's concerned voice broke both of us from the intense glare we shared.

"DID THE GLASS JUST BREAK? LEAH BABY! ISN'T THIS A BAD OMEN. WE SHOULDN'T BE DOING THIS!" "jay.... baby relax it didn't fall on it's own."

"ew, get a room." leah rolls her eyes as she speaks "i guess heeseung bumped into it. right?" "yeah. that is exactly what happened."

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

"so that is basically it. we hold each other's hands and ask if any spirit is out there who wants to contact us. and i know how hard it is for us to remain silent, calm and composed we HAVE to. the candles will flicker and we can then start asking questions! only ask yes or no questions. also, no questions about death, money or future! ok y/n babe light the candles in the center please!!"

as leah instructs all of us we get into position. i immediately scurried next to leah's side and held her hand as we all sat down. i could sense heeseung's intense stare on me but for the sake of my sanity, i choose to ignore him like all my problems in life. didn't know he would someday fall on that list. am i being dramatic? maybe. i am just a girl! 🫧𓇼𓏲*ੈ✩‧₊˚🎀

"wow that is cool and everything but, sorry y/n i don't want to hold sweaty ass palms?" "excuse ME-" "i said what i said!" jake dashes of to sit next to jay who was happily seated next to his gf. this jake had one job. heeseung awkwardly shifts to sit next to me. my hands go cold with the tight feeling in the pit of my stomach. i try to be extremely nonchalant about it. but in the shuffle i almost skid on the stupid floor which makes him snort. i look up to squint at him but it elicits only a response of a smirk from him. oh.

"oh also if the candle assigned to each of us flickers then it is a yes and if all the candles remain still. well, a no." "aw babeee you are learning so well!" "the best is teaching me" as jay shoots a wink at his partner we all physically groan with jake audibly gagging. well this is going to be fun...

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

as the rounds went by the questions became stupider. you would think that all of us had a collective braincell count of negative 5.

"am I the smartest in this group"

" *cough* nO *cough* "

"shut up jake!"

"whaaaat it wasn't me :("

this is what i missed the most, laughing, having fun with your friends. i also long back started to feel at ease with hee's warm hands melting into mine. i had gone overboard with my feelings and it wasn't fair to hee or me... i just had made assumptions. i wished to clear the air. as my other friends continued to bicker i turned towards hee.

"hee...i am sorry for pushing you earlier. i just... it did sting when you said you would NEVER date me. i mean i am not that bad of a person am i" i laugh trying to cover the underlying connotations of my ask. " *chuckles* im sorry y/n. it was actually on me that i assumed you would be averse to dating ME. i mean who would want to date their friends, right?" his response caught me off guard so did his tone. he ended the question with some unsaid hope. i tried to decipher what he meant while trying to study his eyes. his eyes were locked into mine the similar way. trying to uncover the surface and delve deeper.

"i guess there are two other love birds here!" leah's voice broke us from a trance like state. " ahha leah. so its my turn? ok i would like to ask whether i will be rich- "HEE DO YOU WANT TO DIE LEAH JUST SAID NO QUESTIONS ABOUT MONEY!!!" " well...if it means it will be in your arms-"

"ohh my godddddd"

"i think i just barfed in my mouth-"

"YOU are actually the perpetrator of such CRIME!"

"EXCUSE ME-"

no amount of eye rolls can save the redness that creeps into my face. this guy- but this time i try to play along. "well why are you trying to be like romeo-juliet, when we can be hee-y/n alive and happy." i add on a wink feeling extra feisty.

the silence which fills the room could be cut through with a knife. i was about to back track when hee's jaw dropped like never before and a howling laughter ensued.

"oh heeseung she DEVOURED YOU SO BAD!!"

"damn y/n should flirt more often!!"

hee was just as dumbfounded as i was at my response.

"oh yeah? are you sure y/n. don't make promises you can't keep." his voice dropped to a soothing volume. his head tilted with the slightest smolder in his eyes. not to overpowering. just enough to hypnotize, mesmerize. as he turned towards the the candle circle his voice become bold and clear.

"dear spirit just y/n like me?" is he for real!!?? did he just ask that in front of... at that moment it felt as all the air in the room had left. a chill ran through my spine. i could see my friends start to feel uneasy as it seemed something, or someBODY else had joined our little gathering. i could see leah's face drop as she held my hand's tighter than usual. even jake and jay feel completely silent with the ambience in the air which dropped the temperature.

" ok... um so heeseung your candle isn't flickering-"

"but baby look... y/n's candle is flickering."

it felt like time had stopped. the room felt eerily filled with various other auras. feeling intensified. the tension was rising. as if as an instinct i held onto hee's hand tighter than before. from my periphery i noticed him glance towards me. he reciprocated.

"ok that is enough, thank you spirit for joining us." leah broke the tension as she blew out the candles and all of us sighed. as if everyone was holding their breathe expecting the worse.

all of us looked at each other. "ok... well the spirit didn't have to expose me like that..." everyone started giggling. this experience was something else.

"so you do like me?"

"well we all knew that before you two idiots knew."

"for once I agree with jake. you both are so blind, imagine, a LITERAL SPIRIT had to come and expose y'all."

"wellll THIS WAS FUN. and, i beg you y/n. NEVER second guess MY intuition. mwah mwah. you both are soooo adorbs!!"

and all i and hee could do in laugh and fall in for each other all over again.

omg this was long af😭😭 i had so many doubts and second thoughts with this buttttt, i hope you like it‼️‼️ please do show support and love by reblogging🖤and sending in asks in the mailbox💌thank you ‧₊˚🖇️✩ ₊˚🎧⊹♡

#jaays moon #enhypen #enhypen angst #enhypen fluff #enhypen smau #enhypen jay #enhypen jongseong #song fiction #fanfiction enhypen #enhypen imagines #enhypen sunghoon #enhypen jake #enhypen heeseung #lee heeseung #sim jaeyun #park sunghoon #enhypen ni-ki #enhypen sunoo #kim sunoo #nishimura riki

[mossyshrum]

Analysis Of Why Fanon Creek Sucks

The fandom portrayal of Creek, as well as Tweek and Craig on their own, makes me really angry. I don’t understand why people choose to be in a fandom, get invested in the characters and the content, but then make the choice to butcher their personalities.

This will tackle the aspects of their relationship and them as characters simultaneously, since it goes a little hand in hand; misrepresenting their relationship also means misrepresenting their personalities.

You can disagree with me, because people see characters differently, but this is based off of my own observations and opinions. I will stand by this unapologetically, and you can pry this from my cold and dead hands.

People really love making gay relationships (be that WLW or MLM) fall into gendered stereotypes. While they can, and certainly do, it does not fit Tweek and Craig. People tend to always want to shove one character into the helpless, wimpy, and annoyingly submissive role, whilst their partner is some toxic, dominant alpha male. This bothers me for many reasons, because Tweek and Craig are complex characters. They can’t, and shouldn’t, be dumbed down to such simple traits. Craig and Tweek are human and humans are complicated.

Craig always falls into the “alpha” category. He’s controlling, cold, and borderline abusive in every way possible. Tweek is always his bitch, for lack of any other comparison, unable to defend himself and constantly relying on Craig. He’s molded into a crybaby that can’t do anything on his own and can’t throw a punch or anything of the sort.

The issue comes forth when you compare this to their canon relationship.

Tweek relies on Craig, yes, but not to the extent people make it out to be. Craig provides him support and unconditional love no matter what, and Tweek does the same. Craig has never been shown to be cruel to Tweek intentionally, or ever really; the closest we’ve gotten to that was the episode with the Buddha Box and the time he tried to dumb down Tweek’s anxieties with logic. I guess TFBW could kind of apply here, but that was honestly just petty relationship drama between two little kids. Yeah, friendly reminder: they are TEN. Everyone makes mistakes, children especially. Craig has never treated Tweek like garbage, although a lot of people seem to think that, since more fan works than I’d like to admit portray him that way.

Craig in general is a bit of an asshole at times, yeah, but literally who isn’t in this show? Be honest. And don’t say Butters, we’ve all seen some of the shit he does.

(This next paragraph will be going in line with how I see Craig as autistic coded, so skip past it if that’s not your cup of tea !! <3) Treating Craig like he’s an emotionless, apathetic monster because of how he acts rubs me the wrong way, and it always has. He has a lot of traits of someone on the autism spectrum when it comes to handling other people’s feelings, because we’ve seen him try to dispel Tweek’s anxieties with logic numerous times, which is something I and many other autistic individuals do. He doesn’t really understand or empathize with how Tweek felt at first, but once Tweek explained that, no, logic won’t help or soothe me, Craig just changed his tactics and listened, instead. He’s doing his best to assist, because he loves and cares about Tweek, but he wasn’t doing it right at first because he just didn’t get it. That doesn’t make him an asshole, that doesn’t make him a sociopath, and that doesn’t make him an abusive partner. He was trying and he still is.

As for Tweek, GOD - where do I even begin with how people portray him?

A lot of fans apparently saw Tweek and only took away the anxious and paranoid side of him. They snatched this up, combined it with the typical traits of romanticized anxiety, made him a defenseless crybaby, and called it a day! And I hate it. Tweek isn’t... at all how a lot of people make him seem. He’s shown to be aggressive, and protective, and LOUD!! He’s not quiet and submissive in the slightest. His tics (the vocal ones mostly, obviously) are part of the main reason he’s loud, but he’s also just... a loud person in general. When he freaks out, he doesn’t do it silently; he starts screaming and running in circles because the president made another dumb tweet and now they’re all going to die because North Korea hates them so he’d better go tell Craig because their doom is impending and all-encompassing and inescapable. He sent Craig to the hospital after their fight, like he beat his ASS, he doesn’t need Craig to defend him and treat him like a toddler.

I’ve seen quite a few people also ignore his tics. For whatever reason, they act like they’re nonexistent. It shouldn’t just be erased from his character. People think that taking away his tics is an instant fix for his mental illness and that’s so wrong??? That isn’t how that works. Removing his tics doesn’t take away the underlying and constant anxiety he has. It feels like they only do this to make him more “normal”, less alienated. They just write it out because they don’t understand his tics and how they work/affect him.

Why do people do this?

To circle back to the first point I made at the beginning of this post, I think that the butchering of their personalities stems from the inherent need to confine relationships to a box: there has to be one person who is more protective and dominant and one person who can’t do anything for themself. They can’t write a relationship unless it’s like that, because maybe that’s all they’ve seen, or maybe they’ve never been in a relationship, or maybe they don’t understand same-gendered relationships (even though they are no different than heterosexual relationships....) Creek isn’t like that, and it never will be, and it never has been.

A lot of actual published books - coughs gags Colleen Hoover - show relationships like this, and I think it’s ruined a lot of people when it comes to writing and understanding dynamics between characters. The material that they learned from had nothing but weirdly sexually abusive Andrew Tate-esque men and a meek little woman paired off and now it’s all that they know and understand. The popularization of literature like this really needs to stop, not only because of my dumb little South Park-inspired rant, but because it’s teaching a concerning amount of people that relationships like this are healthy and normal when they are anything but. If there’s anything you want to add or talk about, don’t be shy!

Anyway, thanks for coming to my YouTube channel gang. Be sure to subscribe and SMASH that like button!!!!!! 3 am challenge soon

#creek #craig tucker #tweek tweak #south park #creek sp #rant #dumb fandom stuff

[vulturesrottencorpse]

Is this part of my autism or am I just an asshole

ok so basically, there's this really nice girl in my class, she keeps trying to talk me me (guess she wants to be my friend) but I don't like her. I go to a school that isn't mainstream so we get a lot of people with autism, ADHD, ect. You'd think this would make this easier to make friends, right? No. For some reason I'm a very picky person with who I talk to, I need someone who's smarter than me or gets my humour or something. This girl, she just talks, and talks and doesn't get the hint when I try to politely shoo her away. I'll be drawing, she will comment on it and if I respond even with a thanks, she takes it as an invitation to pull her chair over and sit and draw with me. Constantly asking "should I do this?" "How do I draw this part" " what do you think" every 2 minutes. It annoys me because 1, I don't want to be rude, I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings so I can't just tell her to go away, and 2 , I HATE socialising, even with my friends I find talking hard (irl, at least)

Getting too long but, is this normal? Am I a bad person for not liking this person who wants to be my friend, who's really nice and shares all my interests? Aren't you supposed to like people who are just like you? We are almost exactly the same yet I can't stand her. Maybe this is what it's like for other people who talk to me. I don't know.

Edit: a part I forgot to mention was that she has anger issues and gets annoyed pretty easily. When she's mad she just starts yelling and stuff, if I accidentally offend her by telling her I don't want to be her friend I'd be the centre of attention as the person she'd yelling at, which would probably give me a panic attack.

Since the start of this year I've become a very VERY shy person. If you were to ask anyone in my class or any teachers (from my class only) about me theyed probably shrug and say "who?" Or, "oh. The one that draws all the time" which is super odd because basically my whole life I've been bullied and to combat that I became a very loud and outspoken perdon. I still had social anxiety but with my friends I was pretty much obnoxiously confident. I've gone from being told to "shut up!" And "stop talking to loud" to "speak up" and "talk a bit louder nobody can hear you." So the switch is pretty sudden, and attention, ANY attention, a teacher saying hi to me in class, someone walking past and even glancing at me, sets me into panic.

So I can't tell this girl to simply go away, even if I wasn't scared of being mean.

Also, rereading this post I'd like to clarify that I asked if this was autism because of my extremely low social battery, people pleasing behaviour, ect. And I asked if im an asshole because you're SUPPOSED to get along with people who are the same as you. With people who have similar interests or struggles but I HATE being around those people. I hate being around people who remind me of myself. My whole life I've been friends with the confident, loud and unapologetic people. But the more I think, the more my brain tells me "you just don't like them because they have autism, and that annoys you" (IM LITERALLY AUTISTIC)

This is quickly turning into a long ramble session rather than an explanation. So, feel free to just ignore this wall of text lmao.

#autistic things #autism #actually autistic #pls help #I don't wanna be a bad person #But I can only handle so much #Socialising actually physically hurts #What to you mean I have to talk to people

[globetrotter28]

Another Cover Up (Part 3)

Fandom: The Boys

Pairing: Soldier Boy x Fem!Reader

Summary: After Herogasm, Butcher, Hughie and Soldier Boy realise they might need more reinforcements. After doing more research, they discover the woman who was also injected with Compound V alongside Soldier Boy back in the 40’s. Everyone also thought she was KIA that day at Nicaragua. But if Soldier Boy was still alive… maybe she was too?

If you DO wish to be tagged for future updates, please let me know.

Tags: @msbadgirl @queenofspades20 @mimzy1994 @erinnkenobi @goldngguk @ateliefloresdaprimavera @roseblue373 @acarboni21 @sexyvixen7

Chapter Warnings: language, mentions of past trauma, nothing specific but implied sexual assault by a family member

A reminder: this story will not be entirely canon to the show.

Series Masterlist

You were sitting on the wiry mattress of Legend's guest bedroom he had given you to use. Hughie was sitting on the other side of the room, looking at something on his handheld device. He had called it a phone, but it wasn't like any phone you'd seen.

You guess this was something you had to get used to now. How advanced the world had gotten in the nearly forty years you were locked away... you'd been able to easily adjust throughout the years before Russia, but that was because you were living through it. You never woke up one day and everything suddenly changed, it was always gradual...

But Hughie... He was a nice boy, you'd decided. Honest and caring. He kept making sure you had what you needed, happy to talk but understood when to shut up... most of the time... but he was easy to be around. He never seemed to have a hidden agenda, which was always refreshing for a telepath.

Since coming back, you'd not had the best control of your powers. Being able to read a person's mind was easy, but before Russia you'd learnt to switch it off in a way. Only go into a person's mind if you chose to. But you'd been hearing everyone's thoughts and it was a painful migraine the past two days. So not all thoughts were clear to you, it felt like a hundred radio stations competing with each other. It was easier if you were seperate from everyone, or just one on one. You were however, quickly picking up some old tricks of the trade and able to turn it off when you focused hard enough.

He tried his best to not be judgemental. But with Ben... You've always understood that would be difficult for anyone.

Ben was... an acquired taste... and even then he was difficult to read. At least to those who didn't know him like you did. He always came across as this macho man's man. He'd kill you for saying it out loud, but he seemed more and more like his cunt of a father when he was like this. Someone he himself despised...

He's always played an unapologetically, gruff, ready to kill you, misogynistic man, but you knew he was never like that. Not really.

"Y/N, can I ask you a question?" Hughie asks, looking up from his phone.

"You just did." You respond curtly.

Listen, he may have been a nice kid, but that didn't mean you trusted him. Your headache didn't help either. So you weren't trusting of your abilities a hundred percent to accurately read people yet.

"Oh um..." he fumbled.

"Oh for fucks sake, what's your question?"

"Was Soldier Boy... Ben...," he corrects himself. He'd learnt very quickly you hated referring to your childhood best friend by his Supe handle. "Was he always so...?" He trails off unsure.

"So much of an Asshole?" You offer.

Hughie looks at you, as if to say he didn't want to be the one to say it, but you were right on the money.

"Pretty much yeah... after the V." You add.

"Not before?" He asks slightly confused.

You smile sadly.

"No... before Vought, before the labs, before the power and all the bullshit fame that came along with it... Ben was actually one of the nicest guys you'd ever meet."

You don't have to hear Hughie's thoughts to know he struggled believing it.

"Kid... you're scrawny and way more soft toned, but... you kinda remind me of him when we were kids..." you see a mixture of astonishment and offence on his face, causing you to break out in a belly laugh. "That wasn't meant to be offensive at all, Hughie!"

"I just, erm..."

"You can't see it, I know." You chuckle. "Ben plays his part pretty well... one could say too well." Your voice changes. "So fucking well he started to believe it himself..."

"How did you guys meet? They always said, 'Soldier Boy and Vivid have been friends since they were kids', but... I never really believed the true story."

"Let me guess; you were told we grew up on the streets of South Philadelphia and our father's worked together and mother's cooked together. Both had loving and supportive parents. Got each other through the tough times?" He nods. "You're a smart boy."

"Always seemed too perfect."

"It wasn't entirely wrong." Hughie raises his brows. "We grew up in South Philly, and we got each other through the tough times. But our parents hated each other." You chuckle. "Fuck, one time my father threw a brick through their front window. Our parents never wanted us to see each other, because growing up in the 1920's and 30's, girls and boys didn't play together. His father said it made Ben seem like a fairy, and I was a slut. Well... both our parents said that..."

"But they were your parents..."

"Hughie..." you scoff, "not everyone has great parents... ours were some of the worst." Your tone changes to one of sadness once again.

"We met when were seven." You find yourself willing to open up. "He was in a fight with this... tall and chubby twelve year old boy. Ben was holding his own, which was pretty impressive. But his father used to beat into him a lot. And when it wasn't him, it was his mother. So he had to learn pretty young how to block a punch. But this fucking kid... he got Ben onto the ground, was just... going for him. Pummelling into his face, his stomach.

But he kept breathing, he kept blocking. Got a few good hits in himself until the boy lifted him a bit and slammed his head into the pavement. He went to grab this baseball bat... I don't know why I thought I could do it, but I couldn't see this kid get hurt anymore, not when he was so dazed and now I know, concussed. But I ran in and snatched the bat from his hand, and I just started... hitting him with it."

"Wow..." Hughie breathed out, a look of awe on his face.

"I mean, I didn't get out unscathed, he was able to give me a shiner, but I just remember screaming at him... 'Leave him alone! Leave him alone!' And I kept swinging that bat. Eventually hit him in the head and he got knocked out. Headmaster finally came out and saw this seven year old girl standing over two boys with a bat in her hand. Concluded I'd done it to both and starting yanking me to his office to get the cane.

Ben, all concussed and shit, got himself up and started tripping his way after us, saying I was only sticking up for him. Headmaster claimed he was lying, so took the both of us for a caning. That was when we became best friends."

"That's really sweet actually." Hughie said with a soft smile.

"Yeah... we went through a lot together." You said with a far away look on your eyes.

"What about your parents?" He asks.

You looked at Hughie, and something told you it was okay to share your story with him.

"My mother was a bitch, and my father was a bastard." You say coldly. "Both our parents were strict Irish Catholics... my father... well he was never a friendly man, but he got too friendly with me... if you will..." you say, flashbacks of your father hovering over you in the dead of night.

"Y/N..." Hughie's voice is full or sympathy, his thoughts clouded with that and anger as he reads between the lines of what I'm saying.

"You know it happens a lot more than you'd think." You mutter, Hughie remains silent, letting you work your way through it as he notices your eyes beginning to water. "It took about a year of friendship before Ben or I would sneak into each other's rooms. Whenever we did, it was the safest I ever felt. Was in his arms. One time, I was coming back into my bedroom window and I found my father sitting on the end of my bed with the broom in his hand."

You swallowed as your throat tightened even more.

"He beat me black and blue... broke the broom... broke my arm... I was sixteen at the time. Ben had left school and was working in a factory, but he used to always pick me up from school. When I wasn't there for him to walk me home the next day, he snuck into my room that night. Saw my father and saw me, bruised and bleeding... so he killed him."

There's a heavy silence for a moment as Hughie processes the information.

"What about your mother? Did she know?"

I scoff scornfully. "Oh yeah. She fucking knew. She was glad it wasn't just her anymore." You go to grab a cigarette, quickly lighting it and taking a long drag.

"So what happened...?" Hughie prodded gently, wondering about the police.

"We ran away." You blow out the smoke from your lungs. "Lied about our ages. Ben joined the army, I joined nursing school. World War Two broke out, eventually the States joined and they found Ben to be experimented on. We wrote letters every day to each other and eventually my head nurse came to me and said I was to report to a General who had me be experimented on too. Ben had said he wouldn't do it unless I would and he was their only remaining candidate. So they did as he asked. And the rest is history."

There was a knock on the door, before Ben's broad shoulders filled the doorway as he makes his way into the room.

"What are you two doing in-" he cuts himself off as he looks between the two of you, seeing sadness and the sole tear on your face. He shoots an angry look at Hughie. "What are you doing?" His voice changes to one of anger directed at Hughie. He knew the only other time you cried was when you spoke of your parents.

"I uh-"  Hughie struggles to find a way to say anything before you speak up.

"We were just talking, Ben." You say sternly, looking up to him. "Give the kid a break." You send a message to him.

Ben looks at you, seeing that you’re serious.

"Butcher got some food." He grunts out, giving Hughie a warning look before walking back out the door.

Hughie audibly swallows, but not controlling his thoughts.

"You can't always help who you fall in love with, kid." You sigh heavily. He looks at you, shame on his face at being caught out. "Pfft, please... you're the not the only one who thinks he's a piece of shit. Trust me... he can be. He prefers people to think it... sometimes even I wish I didn't care for him considering what he's done to me, but... I'll always remember that seven year old boy." You take the last drag of the cigarette, wishing it was something stronger, before you put it out in the ash tray.

"I'm just not... used to how volatile he can be." Hughie says.

"Yeah... it takes some getting used to. But deep down... he's a big softy." You shrug softly.

"You've never been more with him?" He asks softly, knowing Ben has supe hearing. "More than friends?"

You look up at him, knowing the sadness was filling your face. You lick your lips, a tick you picked up from Ben when you were young.

"No. I've never told him how I feel." You swallow once again.

"He's pretty blind for a Supe." He offers gently as a way to cheer you up. His sweetness kind of works on you.

"Thanks, kid." You say as you walk over and pat him on the shoulder. He gives you a small smile. "You're one of the good ones. I hope you and Annie can work it out."

His face quickly morphs into one of shock. "How di-"

You cut him off with a tap to your temple and a grin on your face. "Remember?"

~~~~~~~~

"What other leads do we have on Mindstorm?" Butcher posed the question to the group around the dining table, but was clearly aimed at Ben and yourself.

"I know he bought some cabins back '81." Ben answers around a mouthful of burger.

"Cabins?" Butcher clarifies.

"Yeah, Mindstorm was always pretty paranoid." You say. "Wanted safe houses"

"Do you know any of the locations?" Hughie asked, pulling his phone across the table to him.

"I know a few in the state. He was starting locally." You said, eyeing him tapping away at his phone with his thumbs with slight confusion.

"I never understood why he bothered telling us locations. It's like the dumb fuck never understood the point of a safe house." Ben snickers. "But he only gave me a few in surrounding states."

"Let me get a pen, I'll write them down." You offer as you move to get up to search for a pad and pen.

"No need, Y/N." You look at Hughie, knowing it'd be hard for him to remember all the locations. He only wiggles his phone at you. "I'm writing it in a note on my phone."

You can't help the slight widening of your eyes in that same confusion from earlier before looking at Ben. You don't know what for... support in knowing you don't understand what is happening maybe?

"You're what?" You finally voice your confusion.

"Technology has come a long way, Y/N/N. They got GPS, internet, weefee, blue toes. All kinds of crap." Ben says with a very clear sense of self confidence.

You look at him even more confused.

"You made those words up." You narrow your eyes at him.

"I did not. Hughie, tell her." Ben gestures to you.

"I mean.. he got them half right..." Ben glares him. "Wifi and Bluetooth, but yeah, he's right. Technology has come a long way."

Ben and you give Butcher and Hughie the locations you can remember, before deciding Butcher would go out tomorrow and start scouting.

"Do you care for some company, Butcher?" You ask.

You don't expect a positive response, but just put out the idea because you didn't want to spend another day in the house where Ben was screwing Legend's staff. Luckily for you, Butcher doesn't disappoint.

"Um..." he looks to Hughie, seeing a small hopeful look on his face. "Yeah... yeah a'right."

"Leave bright and early?" You suggest.

"Sounds good to me, love."

Part 4

#the boys #soldier boy x fem!reader #soft soldier boy #soldier boy x reader #the boys fanfiction #soldier boy fanfiction #fanfic #the boys tv

[annab-nana]

Thinking about how they have all the qualities you’d like in a partner! girlfriend noting how Steve is the perfect boyfriend, with all the cute small things he does for her! thanks Anna <3

you're welcome hun :)

warnings: not proofread, steve fluff, mentions of bad past with guys

❀ masterlist ❀

you'd honestly given up all hope of guys. they either didn't want you unless they wanted to get you in bed or they were just straight-up assholes. you'd never had a good experience with guys so why have faith in them, you know?

that was your outlook on dating and boys until you met steve harrington. 

you watched as he danced around the kitchen currently and made your favorite dinner. he'd dance over to the pan and stir a bit. then, he'd move over to where you sat on the counter to stand between your legs and dance some more but with you. 

you thought back on the day you actually met him. you'd known of him for a while—he was hard to miss—but you interacted with him for the first time when he picked up a paper you'd dropped without realizing it. he'd called your name as he rushed up to you and placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. you had never seen someone's facial expression truly soften before that day like his did when he saw you that close for the first time. he was spaced out and entrapped in your presence that he didn't register you thanking him and taking the paper back from him. 

"steve?" you called when he didn't show any semblance of understanding that you'd thanked him. normally, people would respond verbally or with a nod of the head or something. in a second, he was back with you and gave you a bashful grin. 

"yeah?" 

"thanks," you stated with a giggle, one that gave steve that fluttery gut feeling. he was already falling hard and it had only been a few seconds. if he had had the courage then, he would've asked you out, but that moment wouldn't come until far later in the game. 

now, steve always made sure you had everything you were supposed to have before going anywhere, just in case you accidentally left something behind. the way he noticed small things about you like your forgetfulness was one reason you fell in love with him. 

another reason he captured your heart was that he was so unapologetically himself. like now when he danced around while he cooked and mumbled a low tune, it warmed your heart. he wasn't scared to be himself. he wasn't scared to be friends with those who weren't considered to be the most popular. he wasn't scared of standing up to others for his friends. his loyalty and bravery were attractive to you. 

he was also very gentle, attentive, and caring. he was always in tune with your emotions and could tell from the beginning that you weren't up for a relationship and that was okay. it was a bummer, but as long as he could be in your life in some way, he would take it. steve paid attention more than any other person ever had. no one had been so into you as he was and because of it, you were warming up to him and the possibility of being more than friends. 

but, due to past experiences, you were still cautious and steve knew that. he wasn't going to push you. he just wanted to be your friend and you loved that. with time, you loved him, so after a late-night talk where the both of you discussed everything and nothing at the same time, you mentioned that you may be up for dating again. 

"okay, i don't want to jump the gun, but-" steve started, but you knew where he was headed. 

"yes, i'll go out with you."

steve let out a disbelieving chuckle. "well, i was going to ask if you wanted to date eddie, but i guess i can break the news to him tomorrow that you chose me instead."

you rolled your eyes at him and laughed. "oh, shut up."

"what's on your mind, baby?" steve asked when he spun his way over to you. his arms were wound around your waist as he pulled you closer to him.

your lips lifted into a small smile. "you."

"me?" he pretended to ponder your words for a moment. "all good things i hope?"

you leaned forward and wrapped your arms around his neck, keeping your eyes on his while his own grin grew. "only the best things, my perfect boy."

remember to support writers & reblog :)

turn on notifications for @annab-library to be notified when i post something new!

#stranger things sleepover #stranger things #blurbs #steve harrington #steve harrington blurbs #steve harrington x reader #marjorie189 #❀ marjorie ❀

[thatone-churro]

i was gonna make this addition to someone else’s post but it got longer than expected and i really didn’t wanna do that to them after they said they were done talking about it in regards to their own work.

i don’t know if “bugs” or “irks” are quite the right words for how i feel, but this take certainly does something of the sort to me.

i hate that the concept of “bury your gays” and its related discourses are so quickly applied to ALL queer media. it’s completely stripped of its original context/meaning and i know THAT irks me to no end.

personally, i’m of a mind that queers deserve media about them, about queers, and also about tragedy, death, murder, action and suspense, or whatever the occasion is. it can be about the queer cast while not having a happy ending, or without the cast being perfect.

“casually queer” is how i used to describe my personal project. yes, it’s blatantly and unapologetically queer, and that queerness is important, but it’s not the focus of the story. it’s not the point of the story. there’s still action, still adventure, still death, still tragedy. the cast isn’t perfect, some die, some are awful, some are “problematic,” even the queer cast. most things happen to the queer cast, because most of the major cast is queer.

i don’t understand the idea of condemning a work for “problematic queer characters” if it’s just a primarily queer work. you can’t have a queer story with no conflict or have realistic characters that are perfect. you want a queer story, but no, no, the queer characters can’t be problematic. and the problematic trait they describe is simply just. a character flaw exploited for the sake of the narrative. i don’t get it.

a queer story written for queers shouldn’t be perfect and pure. there should be “problematic” things. there should be tragedy. they shouldn’t have to be pure. they shouldn’t have to be perfect. they shouldn’t be shunned by the community they were created for because they told an otherwise typical story, except now it’s queer. queer stories, or any story, should be allowed to be complex. there should be nuance. not everything in it should be likable. that’s how a story works.

using my story as an example, again, my all-time favorite character and one of my main protagonists for a good chunk of it is a nonbinary lesbian on ace-spectrum. okay. cool. lots of rep there. but they’re heavily flawed. they kill. they have regrets. they make stupid decisions. they’re self-righteous. they’re terrified of being the bad guy yet end up the bad guy in many people’s views. they have one very violent motive. they love their family to such an extent that they’ll destroy anyone who lays a hand on them. they’re complex. they’re nuanced. they’re not always the good guy. that’s how a story is. if they were a perfect, pure, “perfect” character, there would be no story. no enjoyable story, at least.

what baffles me the most is when queer creators make these queer stories and suddenly they’re a bad queer because they killed one of their many queer characters, for instance. i’ll use my project once more for an example. say, remember that nonbinary ace lesbian from less than a paragraph ago? yeah, i ended up killing them at one point. their story was over and while it hurt me, too, it was a necessary step for the story. their story was over and i needed them to start the next chapter of the next protagonists’ story. but as a nonbinary ace lesbian myself, does that make me a “bad queer?” am i suddenly evil if i killed off my sapphic couple that got marrie in the first part because their story was over and there was no other way to move on their daughter’s story with them there? am i the asshole for killing one of my ace characters for a narrative purpose? am i not allowed to do certain things to my queer characters anymore if i don’t want to be a “bad queer?”

i guess these feelings boil down more to how strictly puritan culture and/or cancel culture and/or “problematic” culture has invaded the literary scene and how that impacts me, a queer writer. how are we supposed to tell these stories that people beg for if they are torn down and torn apart for the exact nuances they want? how are we supposed to create anything without relentless scorn or fear of being “cancelled” for thematic complexities? i don’t understand it.

in conclusion:

i realize my opinion on the subject is probably HEAVILY swayed by my own tastes and preferences and i have no idea where i’m going with this anymore and there’s not really an argument here anymore so really this whole thing can be taken with a grain of salt.

anyway, that’s my angry rant for the day. please don’t witch hunt me for it, thanks 🤞

#do you people understand how exhausting this gets for queer creators. do you. #when you’re so quick to get up in arms with pitchforks and torches how are we supposed to create? #‘i want more complex queer stories! no wait not like that.’ what are we supposed to do. #how can we create when those creations are shunned and when we (as queer creators) get ‘cancelled’ for it #do you understand. do you get what this does to your own community. #you can’t want more from us when you openly reject what we put out. #i’m so fucking tired of this as a queer writer. i’m so tired. #someone can probably explain this in a nicer/more formal way but i’ve already written two essays this week i’m not writing another for this #grace being kinda serious for once #text post #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #literature #what do i tag this?? #lgbtq creators #discourse #< i guess #long post

[super-ion]

Ion & Emily - First Date

(master post)

This one's the final episode of the "How it All Started" arc:

How it All Started

First Night Out

~~~

"Okay, but like the portals with the tentacles. How is that not hot?"

Emily rolled her eyes.

"Harper, I thought we were talking about costumes."

"Hotness is about presence," Harper argued.

"And Ion doesn't have presence?"

"I guess… but she's only ever fought Jackrabbit. That's like fighting a plastic bag. Talk to me after she takes on Umbra, then we can compare notes… Oh hey, your girlfriend is here, we can ask her."

Emily looked up to see Jen and she felt her face heat slightly.

"She's not my girlfriend," she hissed. 

"Not with that attitude, she isn't," Harper whispered. "Tell you what, we'll have her settle this, if she picks Ion, you have to give her your number."

Oh… the last thing Emily needed was her coworker trying to meddle in her love life.

"Harper, no-"

"Hi, Jen!" Harper said cheerily. "Emily and I were just having a debate and we were hoping you could weigh in. Who's hotter, Lady Lacuna or Ion?"

Jen squeaked and stumbled as she approached the counter.

"I'm going to murder you," Emily said under her breath, but Harper ignored her.

"Personally, I'm a fan of Lady L, but Emily's fully on board the Ion train."

"Y-you think Ion is hot?" she mumbled.

Emily glanced up from Jen's coffee. It might have been her imagination, but Jen almost seemed to be studying her curiously.

"Yeah," Emily sighed. "I like how she does things."

"You like how she targets big banks and corrupt politicians, we're talking about hotness," Harper argued.

"Didn't you just say hotness was about presence?" Emily shot back. "Also, Ion is unapologetically queer."

"Okay yeah, she does have that going for her," Harper admitted. "So who's it gunna be, Jen?"

Jen shot a panicked look between the two of them. 

"I… uh…"

"You don't need to answer," Emily said. "She's being nosy."

Jen relaxed slightly at that.

God, how could someone be so awkwardly cute? Emily thought to herself.

Fine.

Before she could second guess herself, Emily popped the cap off her pen and scribbled something extra on Jen's cup. She set it down on the counter and put on her brightest smile which wasn't hard around Jen.

"Here you go," she said. "Have a great day Jen."

Jen picked up the cup and her eyes grew improbably wide. They darted between the string of digits on the cup and Emily's face. Even as her face grew beet red, the corners of her lips quirked into the tiniest goofy smile.

"I… thanks… um… you too!"

She turned, blushing and fled the cafe.

"Oh my god!" Harper said giddily. "Did you really-"

"Shut it, Harper," Emily replied, unable to keep her own smile off her face.

***

It was… not quite a great day for Emily. She genuinely liked working at the cafe, she liked watching normal people just doing normal people things. The problem was, some normal people were assholes. For whatever reason, the rest of the day had just been a relentless string of one entitled customer after another.

She was tired. She just wanted to collapse at home and watch something mindless. But of course she had to stop at the ATM, which meant she was right outside the bank when half a dozen cop cars swarmed in, screeching to a halt around her.

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me," she muttered. She glanced at the machine which still held her card captive. Yeah… she wasn't getting it back now. 

Before she could move to evacuate the premises, one of the windows of the bank exploded outward and a black clad figure tumbled out. The figure staggered to her feet and brushed the glass off her. Emily found herself staring at the form fitting costume, black and glowing green and shining chrome.

Ion.

Oh my god, she's hotter in person, Emily thought.

Ion looked up and froze as she saw the assembled police cars. For the tiniest moment, Emily saw a flicker of very real fear on her face.

Fights between supers were usually fought with a certain expectation of professional courtesy. In general, that expectation did not extend to cops, especially for an openly trans supervillain who already had a record of exposing police misconduct.

That was probably the main reason why Emily was not at all surprised by what happened next. It was also mostly why she didn't try to resist… mostly.

Ion was suddenly behind her, one arm wrapping across Emily's shoulders and mechanical limbs looming menacingly over her.

"I'm really sorry about this," Ion murmured in her ear. "Do you consent to being taken hostage and/or being used as a human shield?"

"Uh… yeah, sure," Emily replied. "But you should probably be aware-"

"Talk later. Hold on tight."

Alright then. This was happening. Emily knew that when a super told you to hold on tight, you had better do it quickly and without question. Something unfolded from Ion's backpack and emitted a low humming that Emily recognized as gravimetric repulsors spinning up. She tightened her grip and they shot into the sky.

"Oh shit!" Ion shouted. "Shit shit shit!"

They were going very high, very fast. Ion was clearly not used to passengers. For a horrible moment they started tumbling before the wings flared with a groan and they slowed to a hover high above the city.

"Sorry," Ion said sheepishly. "These are new. I'm still getting used to them."

"Wait," Emily replied. "Have you ever actually flown before?"

Ion offered an embarrassed smile before they rocketed forward towards the river. She brought them to an apparently abandoned warehouse by the docks, and they descended through a broken skylight as the floor opened to  reveal a subterranean landing pad.

They set down gently and the ceiling slid closed above them ominously.

Ion sighed and raised her hands to her face to remove her mask. Emily cleared her throat and Ion spun, looking surprised that she still had a hostage. She blinked her luminous green eyes a few times and something like recognition flashed across them.

"O-oh," she said. "Right. Hostage."

Emily narrowed her eyes. There was definitely something familiar about Ion that she couldn't quite place.

"Do I know you from somewhere?" she asked.

Ion blanched and straightened.

"No. I've never met you before in my life," Ion lied.

Okay, that was honestly fair, given that she was a supervillain. However, all Ion had accomplished was convince Emily that she was a riddle to solve.

"You've never kidnapped anyone before, have you?"

"I have… not," Ion admitted.

Emily suppressed a laugh.

"Okay, so you're probably going to want to lightly restrain me. Maybe that chair over there? Do you have any rope?"

"I… do."

Ion darted over to a set of drawers and proudly produced a spool of rope. Emily seated herself in the chair and attempted to get comfortable.

Emily, what the hell are you doing?? she asked herself as she looked expectantly at Ion.

"Is this alright?" Ion asked as she wound the rope around Emily.

"Yeah, you're doing great," Emily replied as part of her tried to ignore the fact that she was presently living out one of her fantasies. Another, louder part of her was relishing it.

"So…" Emily said to break the awkward silence. "You should probably know that there's a good chance Umbra is going to be coming to rescue me."

Ion fumbled the knot she was working on.

"Just thought you should get a heads up," she continued. "And if you wanna record it or anything, can you please blur my face before releasing any of the footage?"

"Uh, yeah, sure," Ion replied.

Then after a moment, "Why Umbra? Are you and he…?"

Emily barked a laugh.

"Oh god no," she said. "Among a whole lot of other reasons, he is absolutely not my type... if you take my meaning."

"Oh good," Ion said with noticeable relief. Then after a pause, "Do… uh… you want anything to eat? I have a robot making grilled cheese right now… nothing special though. I usually don't trust them with the cooking, but I actually managed to finally get the recipe and process right. It's about the most complicated thing they can manage."

Emily raised an eyebrow.

"Are you offering your hostage a meal?"

Ion shrugged.

"Sure. I mean, this whole kidnapping thing has got to be hugely inconvenient for you. The least I can do is offer you a meal."

"Sure, why not?" Emily replied.

A bright smile flashed across Ion's face and she disappeared into a side room. This was certainly turning out to be a unique experience to say the least.

Ion reappeared a moment later with the steaming sandwich. She set the plate down in front of Emily who tentatively picked up the sandwich. Nothing special grilled cheese was actually amazing. She knew it was technically robot made, but if Ion was half as good at cooking, maybe Emily should give Ion her number. Wouldn't that be ironic? Her dating a supervillain?

She studied Ion as the villain opened a cabinet filled with labeled binders. She plucked one labeled Umbra and began flipping the pages as she idly chewed her lip.

Holy crap, did she just have binders for every possible scenario? Admittedly, Emily hadn't met many supervillains, but she doubted many of them went to this level of detail. It was actually kind of endearing in a weird way… and again, vaguely familiar.

"Hey," Emily said. "You seem pretty nice and I'd hate for you to get hurt on my account. You should probably just throw this fight. I have a feeling Umbra's not going to pull any punches if he thinks I'm actually in danger. Also, he's smart enough not to get Rickrolled into submission."

Ion looked up in surprise and Emily felt herself blush slightly.

"Yeah, I watched the video of you taking down Jackrabbit," Emily admitted. "I gotta admit, it was pretty fucking awesome watching you take that prick down like that."

She felt a very familiar chill in her bones and she glanced at the ceiling where shadows were slithering unnaturally along the seam in the door.

Ion followed her gaze and she grew pale and swallowed nervously.

"This was fun," Emily told Ion. "We should do it again some time. See you around, yeah?"

"Yeah…" Ion replied as the shadows detached from the ceiling and coalesced into a human figure between them.

***

Unknown number, 7:15pm:

Hello? Emily? This is Jen.

Emily, 7:17pm:

Hey Jen! How's it going?

Jen, 7:18pm:

I am well.

I had a tough workout today, definitely feeling it.

How was your day?

Emily typed out a bland response and deleted it. There *had* been something very familiar about Ion…

No… that was impossible. 

Except impossible things happened every day, she reminded herself.

Emily, 7:26pm:

Pretty good overall

Work kinda sucked, but I had a really good evening

#ion & emily #my writing #supervillain oc #lesbian #transgender #writers on tumblr

[spitfirxs]

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆 ... 𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐦𝐩𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥 .

ace campbell the twenty seven year old is known as the spitfire within the group. they are known to be charming and enigmatic which makes sense when you think about how his parents have been threatening him with rehab but i guess we’ll find out for ourselves.

full name : ace campbell . label : the spitfire . age : twenty seven . dob : tba . status : single . sexuality : bisexual . positives : charming extroverted exciting confident . negatives : hedonistic enigmatic unapologetic . aesthetics : rockstar antics, heart pounding under the influence of tonight's drug of choice, dimples that feign innocence with hands that definitely did it, leaving a trail of destruction in your wake, thinking emojis are a valid method of communication, selfishness in pursuit of pleasure, a bottle of champagne for one, adopting ' disappointment ' as a personality trait to take away the sting, an unapologetic strut in your step, tanned skin used as a tattoo canvas, ring-clad fingers drumming the steering wheel of a sports car, the fear of love vs. the crave of chaos .

many people see ace's selfish attitude and automatically blame the parents , as though they chose to have a kid who would grow up to becomes a twenty seven year old teenager. his childhood in california was something of dreams. ace got everything he ever wanted - private school and summers in their gorgeous pool in their giant yard. the most idyllic upbringing that was, in ace's opinion, snatched away when he was ten and told that they'd be relocating to michigan .

it was a business move, with the parents following opportunities, but it was also for the family. they didn't want to have los angeles kids, seeing spoiled and selfish traits in ace as he started middle school. but when they moved to michigan, the kids still had everything they ever wanted with a giant ass house, and ace's natual charisma had him making a new batch of friends in record time .

all through high school, ace got sucked in to the partying lifestyle. he was always the happiest when surrounded by people, the flow of alcohol and the laughter of a good time. he doesn't do well alone. it's partially from being a twin and never really being alone, and also from wanting to drown out the noise with ... louder noise. he has never really spoken about it, but shit's dark in his head sometimes .

the move to michigan really opened up opportunities for his parents, meaning one or both of them would be away for stretches of time. cue the campbell residence becoming party central .

the transition from normal rich kid to renowned asshole was subtle and unintentional. ace is headstrong and out for a good time, and his reliance on quick doses of pleasure sometimes has him neglecting whoever he's getting his quick kicks with. sometimes he's aware of it, sometimes he isn't .

but his headstrong nature and knowing what he wants for himself translates to the way that he is with his friends. assholery that isn't a byproduct of his own pursuit of pleasure ? not acceptable. he'll be the first to stick up for his friends, in immediate defence of whoever he thinks is right. a part of it is just friendship loyalty, another part is that he doesn't want other peoples' disagreements to stop him from having a good time .

dumb af and he's definitely burned away a lot of his iq points but he's a wizz at math. he can do almost any sum in his head, went to college for maths and statistics and had planned to work in the finance department of his parents' company when graduating. which he did, but he doesn't do it full time. simply because he doesn't have to.

but it goes without saying, when aaron invited them all he was one of the first to rsvp. he wasn't about to miss out on a good ole time .

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

all of them any gender : ex-fiance, hook ups, people he pissed off, someone he's constantly fighting with, mutual terrible influences, someone that he secretly can't stand, someone that knows too much about him ( maybe he poured out his thoughts n feelings when drunk one night ), exes, first love .

#lake:intro

[bad-luck-clover]

SPOILERS FOR STRANGER THINGS SEASON 4 VOL. 2

Okay I haven’t posted in forever but but I was literally crying this morning over the Stranger Things Finale before I even watched it so here are my two cents:

Why the fuck is the message of season 4 “don’t be honest about who you are or what you’re struggling with or it’ll hurt/kill you no matter what you do?” Because that’s the point this finale seemed to make.

Will started to open up to Mike about his feelings, albeit in a very indirect way, and that just resulted in Mike pursuing El even further. And even after all of that Mike and El still aren’t actually talking and Will has still been demoted from main character and plot catalyst to the sad gay side character that’s sometimes a monster detector??? So I guess Will just has to continue hiding who he is while he watches his sister and friend/crush continue their codependent and ultimately stagnant relationship and he’s once again being tossed aside in favor of a character that was supposed to die season 1. I mean I love El, but come on, they’re treating Will like he’s completely irrelevant now.

Max started coming to terms with her trauma and mental health, started opening up to her friends finally and was rekindling her relationship with Lucas. She was obviously hurting after Billy died and it was even mentioned that she was suicidal, but she fought to stay alive and get back to her friends who she loves. It was such an obvious metaphor of battling mental illness and Max’s character arc in the first part of the season was so amazing to watch. But no, apparently it doesn’t matter if you fight through the struggles of mental illness and seek help from your support group, the trauma monster is just gonna torture and literally break you anyway, sorry.

And Lucas, despite finally standing up to Jason after trying so hard to fit in and be part of his group, got beat up and then watch the girl he clearly loves be mutilated right in front of him and then put into a coma.

I mean even Robin, who’s still understandably deep in the closet, started to open up a tiiiiiiny bit and had hope for her potential relationship with Vickie and then immediately saw her kissing a guy. But the second she gives up on that and steps a bit further back in the closet? Oh, Vickie broke up with him, thanks for not coming out Robin, you get a cookie.

And Eddie. I do not understand how they could kill the one character who was always 100% unapologetically himself the entire time we saw him. He was labeled a freak and later a psychotic devil-worshipping murderer and yet he never changed who he was to please anyone or even lashed out at the people who wanted to hurt him. Not to mention he’s queer-coded as hell and I seriously doubt that was unintentional. I mean if you’re writing a period show and you do research about 80s culture and especially subcultures and outcasted groups for Eddie specifically, why would you give his character a black bandana in his back pocket if you’re not trying to imply that he’s queer? He was always true to who he was, he protected the kids who reminded him of himself when they were lost and being picked on. He was nice to everyone as long as they weren’t an asshole and he ultimately fought to save his friends and all the people who hated him. And what did he get? He got brutally, painfully killed while the entire town still believed he was a monster and no one besides Dustin and his uncle, not even the other people he fought with in the upside down, mourned or even acknowledged him.

It’s so infuriating that Max and Will (and Robin and Lucas to a lesser extent) suffered and were hurt because they were beginning to open up. But Eddie has always been open and nothing was going to make him start pretending to be someone else so he just straight up died. The one person who was always honest and never lied about who he was and they killed him for shock value. Like am I just reading into this too much or does that literally send a message of “if you start to open up you’ll get hurt. And don’t even try to fully be your true self, because look what’ll happen”

And yeah, sometimes life is cruel and you get hurt unjustly for just being who you are. But this is a fictional tv show where children fight off monsters. A show who’s main audience are the very outcasts they’re now sidelining and killing off in favor of more conventionally “typical” characters. I relate to Will, Robin, Max, and Eddie the most out of all these characters and now I’m being made to watch them suffer for all the reasons I relate to them so much.

Mike and El are still in a pretty unhealthy and unbalanced relationship and they’re fine. Jonathan and Nancy are still lying to each other and refusing to communicate and they’re fine. Steve, as much as I love him, is still pining after Nancy without actually directly talking to her (which, sidenote, is just a huge disservice to his otherwise fantastic character arc imo) and yeah he’s hurting seeing her with Jonathan again but he’s ultimately fine. The only people who really suffered are the only ones who have stopped lying about who they are or what they’re struggling with or who never did so in the first place.

How can you write the line “Forced conformity, that’s what’s killing the kids. That’s the real monster” and then punish the handful of characters who are trying to break away from that conformity? Why the hell, in a show that used to be all about outcasts forming relationships and fighting monsters against all the odds not in spite of being different, but because they’re different, are those very characters being hurt and punished for not being like everyone else?

Like, I’m just so fed up and tired. This show is legitimately ruined for me now, and it’s not because a character I liked died or the ship I was rooting for didn’t happen. It’s because I look at these characters I relate to being tormented and hurt for being queer or neurodivergent or having trauma, things that I experience/struggle with myself, and the message I hear is “What you are is wrong and bad things will happen to you because of it. You deserve to hurt because of what you are and you will never be safe or happy.” And that fucking kills me, especially since this was a show I loved so much just yesterday and now I can’t even stand to watch it.

#stranger things #stranger things spoilers #vol 2 spoilers #this is so fucking long but i'm devastated and still processing #i was prepared to be let down but not THIS BAD #long post #will byers #mike wheeler #eleven #max mayfield #robin buckley #lucas sinclair #eddie munson #nancy wheeler #jonathan byers #also erica is an obvious exception to this #she is unapologetic and untouchable by death

[kyogre-blue]

Finished the Dirge of Bilqis, Tadhla, and Apocalypse Now world quests (for now?). 

We do have a mysterious additional quest “Her Foes Rage Like Great Waters...” that is gated until Feb 6, which I can only assume will finally remove the giant sandstorm in the center. But I’m done with the story for now. 

And it’s... very disappointing. 

I’ve come to have some expectations of the major world quest chains, since Sakura Cleansing, Aranyaka, and Golden Slumber were all quite good, better than the archon quests imo. Yes, I didn’t exactly love Ruu’s stuff, and the sumeru quests had some pacing issues, but the story was still good on the whole. 

But I can’t really say the same for this. We have Jeht returning, and her parts were the best because they at least somewhat echoed the focus on family that Golden Slumber had, but the stuff with the Tanit and Liloupar was just kind of bad. 

I will admit some of it might come down to me simply not liking this kind of story and tone, but I also think it just wasn’t written well. 

There were also small visual issues that added up, like them using generic NPC models without any alterations for the Tanit (worst on Babel, who uses a stupid sexy model that just looks dumb, but also Tadhla who has a “coming of age” despite being very obviously a mature adult model) and the models having no expressions but the camera often zooming in on their faces. This isn’t unique, but it stood out more than ever here. 

As for the writing, it’s... So there are basically three main plots: 1) Jeht finds her father’s old tribe and decides to seek out an ancient mystical location to lay her parents’ spirits to rest there, 2) the Tanit tribe’s machinations and internal struggles, 3) Liloupar’s story and the destruction of the ancient city of Gurabad. 

As I said, 1 on its own is kind of okay. I still felt something because we already know Jeht. But unfortunately, she’s dragged through 2 and 3 as well, and she’s not strong enough to be our emotional connection to 2. They also do a number of “tell not show” on her personality, and in ways I don’t find beneficial to Jeht on the whole. When she goes off on the big guy and we fight him to the death, it really feels like Jeht is being unreasonable, even though she’s right by the power of writer clairvoyance. 

3 is the usual Genshin lore that is too convoluted and pointless. Liloupar is also just awful. She’s extremely abrasive toward every single person we meet, by way of what feels to be racial slurs, weirdly suggestive, and utterly unapologetic for having done completely monstrous things. Yes, yes, the fae do not follow human morals, etc, but like... it’s just not interesting and it’s deeply unpleasant. Her “final words” are also a mess because she seems to have put this shepherd boy on a pedestal when she fell in love with him ("I thought he was above mortals”), then fucked him over when he proved to be fallible, fucked over their children and an entire city, and now puts the Traveler on a pedestal too. It’ll be fine because the Traveler doesn’t have any flaws, of course, but it’s so stupid to read through. 

There’s also some really annoying patterns emerging, but I’ll complain about those separately. 

But 2, the Tanit... man. MAN. That was so bad. 

The Tanit are a tribe, so they’re a bunch of NPCs. We don’t have any room to really learn about them, except perhaps Tadhla in the most general way. But they are deeply fucked up. I don’t even mean Babel’s power struggles, because who cares, but everything else is just an endless parade of “look at the strange, savage ways of these desert barbarians.” It doesn’t just look bad for them, but also for eremites on the whole, since we have comparatively few eremite characters and especially groups. 

I guess maybe I hang out on Tumblr too much, because I found it both annoying and shallow when they just had to go with “the desert is so harsh and unforgiving, and that’s why everyone here is a merciless asshole who kills without hesitation.” Really reminded me of a post I saw at one point about how sad it is that the desert areas are never home to anyone and always portrayed as utterly inhospitable. 

#playing genshin

[creepereyes]

I can’t believe antis are still spouting the ‘Billy was a violent racist how can you like him?!’ argument.

One vague line doesn’t prove anything, and I guarantee you Billy would’ve reacted the exact same way if it had been Mike, Will or Dustin pestering Max in those scenes.

Even if Dacre himself confirmed that Billy WAS a little racist, people can change. Racism can be unlearned, and I’m going to make a Stranger Things/The Walking Dead comparison post that might give antis an aneurysm.

You don’t have to be familiar with The Walking Dead to understand this post, but I’d say it’s worth a read especially if you like both shows.

This post is going to get long so I’m inserting a read more.

Billy is not an irredeemable monster. He never uses racist slurs and never hate crimes Lucas. Pushing someone against the wall and scolding them is not attempted murder. Lastly, he’s a teenager. It’s not like he’s a dude in his 40′s bullying an 8th grader.

All these Billy antis need to watch The Walking Dead, specifically the first three seasons. Why, you ask? Because that show had a racist character who was on the track to changing his ways and becoming a better person.

In TWD season 1 episode 2 we meet Merle Dixon, older brother of series favorite Daryl Dixon. Merle is a violent, unapologetic racist who, shortly after being introduced, provokes a black man into attacking him so he has an ‘excuse’ to beat him up. He’s a terrible person. (Though early series Daryl is no saint either, he’s quick to violence and is often hostile to other members of the group).

After Merle saws his own hand off to escape a bad situation, he goes missing for over a season. When he comes back, he’s different. He’s still an asshole and while he still drops a racial slur, he doesn’t sling the n-word anymore and shows the odd moment of compassion. As the season progresses, we start to understand why Merle is the way he is and that he has more layers than expected. Much like Billy, he has sides to him that other people rarely see, and that really shines when he interacts with Herschel, the one person who shows him kindness.

As unpredictable as Merle is, he does the right thing in the end. And guess who really gets through to him and convinces him to do the right thing?

Michonne, a black woman.

Just like Billy, Merle sacrifices his own life and dies to protect a group of people who don’t give a shit about him, and is then mourned only by a younger sibling with whom he had a very complicated relationship.

Don’t get me wrong, there’s no justifying or excusing his hateful actions in season 1. We as viewers are supposed to have conflicting feelings about Merle. He starts off as a racist asshole, but he turns out to be more complex than he seems, and if he lived past season 3 I’m confident he could’ve really changed for the better. In my opinion, Merle is a great character because despite his heinous past actions, he’s complex, layered and interesting. His interactions with other characters are fantastic and his actor, Michael Rooker, did a great job giving more depth to a character that could’ve easily been a one-note villain. (Sound familiar?)

My point? Anyone can change. If a 50 year old violent racist can begin changing his ways, so can a teenage boy.

If Billy had survived season 3 and gotten away from his abusive father, he would’ve changed too. It would take time and he’d need support, but it would’ve happened. He could’ve formed healthy relationships. He could’ve teamed up with Steve, Robin, Eddie and Nancy to kick Vecna’s crusty ass. 

Antis blatantly refuse to admit it, but Billy would’ve changed and flourished if he got out of his toxic home and had people believe in him. 

They just can’t handle a character with layers.

#billy hargrove deserved better #billy antis dni #pro billy hargrove #not tagging twd because I don't want to get swarmed with Merle antis who accuse me of being racist

[dollsandmasks]

2 & 7 for the f/o asks!

Oh, thank you, kind anon! I cannot believe I was gifted an excuse to talk about my garbage lizard man. Today is a blessed day.

Anyway, Micchy from Yo-kai Watch Shadowside it is!

Because I have 657567 blorbo scrunklies running around in my head at any given moment, but he is special, okay?

2. on what do you disagree with other fans of your f/o?

Hoo boy, where do I begin? First of all, whenever Micchy appears in any given fanwork, you never know if the author is his fan, his hater or just neutral. All three are not immune to mischaracterization and bad takes. Some thing I have seen in his fan portrayals that I disagree with:

Making him an unapologetic jerk or a bad friend. I get it, jocks have been characterized as assholes since times immemorial, and he does have a delinquent background which shows up in his behaviour... Like, once in canon? Also, he has made a snide comment to Haruya at one point, and you cannot forget him making an absolute fool of himself that one time him and Natsume went shopping. These are the only three instances of him being anything but a friendly, kind and supportive person who is always there for everyone and will risk his own life and safety to make sure his friends are okay. He is one of the least mean yo-kai in the agency, and he is usually on the receiving end of every joke, jab and insult, which he just accepts as normal (low self esteem gang rise up). He is this big scary-looking dog that is cuddly and soft and full of love, but people see "big scary dog" and cannot fathom not writing about it biting anyone. This is what you get for being a scary monster man, I guess?

In addition to the previous point, making his friendship with Natsume into something creepy. I'm sick and tired of his haters misinterpreting the relationship and portraying him as an evil abusive stalker, so it is doubly saddening when people who appear to be his fans are doing the same thing. Like, yeah, ha ha funny simp man, but can we talk about how he never touched her without her permission (aside from when it was necessary to protect her from immediate danger), how he never tried to police her relationships with her other friends in any sort of way, how he never made her uncomfortable or scared (their first meeting notwithstanding), just annoyed by his general clinginess? I fully support Natsume in standing her ground and drawing necessary boundaries with him, but we as a fandom really don't have to make Micchy's awkwardness any worse than it already is. The guy is clearly trying his best and just wants to be a good friend and a good knight, he is immature and still learning. Why demonize his issues when we can explore and analyze them instead?

His age. This is where I actually agree with some fans and disagree with others, since he doesn't have a canon age, and people are bound to see him differently. To me, all yo-kai are ageless by default, since they are, well, yo-kai, and age works differently for them. Micchy looks adult(ish), but we do know that his Lightside's appearance is his own design, he chose to look like that, and it has no bearing on his actual age or maturity level. As for his maturity, I would say it fluctuates depending on the writer, but he generally appears to be between 14-18 years old, which is a huge range, but that's genuinely how he feels to me depending on the episode. Of course, his actual age could be well into centuries, or he could be, like, ten, because we do not know the rate at which his species matures. Honestly, him being a yo-kai makes this a moot point anyway. He is a ghost lizard, and appears to be in his middle or late teens by ghost lizard standards, and it might take him a few decades to transition into a young adult ghost lizard, because yo-kai live long lives and age slower than humans. You could say I do not disagree with people seeing him as being a certain age, I disagree with people who want to make his age a problem. Just headcanon him as whatever you are comfortable with, it's up for interpretation, and you are the ones chosing to interpret him in a way that squicks you. Want to see his feelings towards Natsume as a romantic crush, but don't like the implied age gap? Make him a teenager in your story, problem solved. Want to pair him up with Whisper instead? Poof, he is a young adult now, go wild. Sometimes characters don't have certain info disclosed about them, because it is irrelevant or up to interpretation, and there is no shame with filling it up according to your story needs.

One last thing (but I might think of more later and reblog this post with additions), I have seen different interpretation of how Micchy looks like underneath his suit and mask, and the only one I kind of disagree with is him having two functional eyes underneath the mask. Sure, cyclopic characters are harder to draw and tend to look weird with certain proportions, but come on, what's the point of having a monster guy in your story if you take away his monster traits? No eye means bye, it's one or I'm done. If you want to draw him as fully human, then sure, but even then I highly prefer for him to wear an eyepatch or have one eye covered by his bangs to keep the aesthetic. Speaking of hair, I support pretty much all headcanon hair people come up with, but my personal thing as of late is to imagine him with dark purple scales in places humans usually have hair. Not only does it make his Lightside form aesthetically more serpentine, it's also a very dashing monster guy look in general. I do disagree with people who think he would look wrong with hair and are opposed to people drawing him like that, though. Let my man be a bishie for once in his life, lol.

7. did your f/o deserve better?

YES. YES HE MCFREAKING DID. Micchy deserves the world. He deserves to be loved, appreciated and supported by his friends. He deserves no physical or verbal assaults thrown at him, especially when he is not doing anything wrong. He deserves to be educated on why his behaviour might upset others, to be given a chance to learn and do better. He deserves to repair his relationship with Mizuchi. He deserves to find love - I don't care who it will be, as long as they have a healthy and supportive relationship, I'm all for it. He deserves to do something grand and be seen as a hero he strives to be. He deserves to know that his friends will love him anyway, even if he never ends up doing anything grand at all. He deserves a quiet evening spent reading comic books, with a warm blanked wrapped around him. He deserves food that's good for him and a place to live. He deserves to be healthy. He deserves to love himself for who he is. He deserves recognition. He deserves at least one more focus episode, or two, or ten. He deserves a more detailed backstory.

And he sure as fuck deserved a much bigger role in the final arc of the anime. They barely let my man do anything. Sure, it makes narrative sense, since it wasn't his battle, and him staying on the sidelines and protecting the more vulnerable teammates was important and a good strategy, but I wanted him to do something memorable, to tie together his arc of wanting to become a hero, to take his Mitsumata Ghidorah form for the first time in the anime and go ballistic on Soranaki. I am happy with the final arc we got, my only complaint is that Micchy was done dirty by the writers. He could have done so much more.

#yo-kai watch shadowside #youkai watch shadowside #yokai watch shadowside #micchy #micchi tag #micchy tag #mitsumata nozuchi #sly #slimamander #natsume amano #amano natsume #summer adams #mitsumata mizuchi #whisper #soranaki #f/o #ask game #micchynatsu #micchy x natsume #whispermicchy #whisper x micchy #I only briefly mentioned the ships but I'm tagging them anyway so people can filter them #I don't want a shipping war down in the notes lol #not tagging this as selfshipping because we did not even touch upon the topic at all #it was just general micchy talk #but I love talking about micchy so that's okay #anon ask

[battlekilt]

For tonight's Special Feature on Channel #2224—

Cody being an asshole... to Kenobi. Water is wet. Kamino still has plenty of it and Tatooine still has two suns.

Bell-like in clarity—the voice reached in through the surface and broke through to him, grabbed him, and yanked him out of his thoughts— “—don’t make me say your number, Cody, please. You know, I hate it when I have to do that—" Reality became all too sharp again, its blade slicing through the tension of his ruminations. “I’m surprised you have enough power cells left in your skull to remember that many numbers after all your many attempts at self-induced alcohol poisoning—” “Not an attempt if it was successful,” Kenobi murmured like a breeze across the planes of Naboo. He tossed his folded outer robes over the back of one of the chairs across from his Commander’s side of the desk, then groan on his way down to lay on the office lounge. Dramatically, the Jedi Master tossed an inner elbow over his eyes, and crossed his ankles with far too much satisfaction to pass muster by Cody’s standards, “It is only four digits.” All that ruckus summoned Cody’s attention, “Yes, but you lived,” he said, thick layers of condemnation rife with disappointment, and then rotated in his chair without removing the curled fingers on the edge of his chin. Without a glance, Obi-Wan knew the Commander was frowning at him for reasons other than the Jedi’s continued survival. “Technically, it is fifteen digits—and get your boot off my chaise, Kenobi.” “My sincerest apologies, Commander.” Obi-Wan sounded unapologetic and made no move. “I’ll try to forgive you for your shortcomings,” Cody grumbled, then kicked the legs of his lounge hard enough to knock the General’s arm off to squint at him, “But not your boots on my furniture!” The red-haired man groaned upright, loudly unzipped one long boot, “Of which, I have many,” he stated exhaustedly, undid the other, removed his boots, and then resumed his position. He heard the sound of Cody dramatically lighting at least two candles, muttering something along the lines of, “you can say that again.” Obi-Wan squinted, then replaced his elbow over his eyes. Clones were truly dramatic. “We were taught that self-awareness was a virtue required before self-improvement could be achieved.”

Showed to a bigtime Cody friend who asked a critically important character question about their favorite Clone Commander...

Neon: Why does Cody have a chaise lmao, sounds too posh

Me: He has guests and a need to make a good impression. But mostly, he wanted one. So, he asked Kenobi, who was too excited for a chance to give his dear Commander all his Clonely wishes

"Would it be too much to ask for a new General?" "Like who, Cody?" "Secura." "Bly could complain." "No, he wouldn't. I'd demote him, make him my TIC, and he'd be too happy." "You'd replace Rex?" "No, I'd put him in charge of the Star Corps." "Cody, I have bad news for you." "Now what? You've somehow managed to promote me? Again?" "No. Rex in command of the Star Corps would put half a galaxy between you and Rex. At all time." Cody is thinking… oh… yeah… he doesn't like the idea. "I guess you can stay." After a moment of silence, Obi-Warn heard, "How about Vos?" "Good grief, Cody. I'm not that bad." "Would you like a second... third... fourth... fifth... sixth opinion? I'm pretty sure I could continue, but they'd still give the same answer." "Cody, take a nap on your chaise." "Yes, General."

#bucket's writing #bucket's snippets #commander cody #obi wan kenobi #// they are purely platonic #// this is their brotherly love language #// cody is also a man who is tempted to murder half his brothers #// and half the time he is ready to kill his general

[bubblyernie]

I’m going to say something here y’all and grab your pitchforks or whatever but

I love helluva boss it’s my guilty pleasure show and every episode feels like the crew is having fun voicing and animating and putting in jokes, it feels like a passion project

The latest episode, I’m going to say it: if we want a deep connection love story I think Millie and moxie fulfill that great. It’s witty and sweet and it’s a good breather from the Everything Else. I think it’s really funny and a good dynamic for Stolas and Blitz to just be two guys who fuck like they don’t have to be more than that, it’s Hell, people are allowed to be shallow and unapologetically horny! I don’t think the love at first sight childhood friend backstory was necessary, it kinda makes it less like…punchy? it’s got more uniqueness when it’s just some rich asshole guy with no filter @ this other asshole who can’t shake him off his back and they do care about each other but in a different way than “he’s my first friend ever, I fell in love the second I saw him” etc. Basically angst good i guess, but it feels like a speed bump rather than a plot point in my opinion, also very glad stolas told off his wife Stella’s such an unapologetically evil tyrant of a woman and fits the setting and themes very well

Ofc whatever the writers of the show are aiming for in all for it!! I still love the work that is put into Helluva regardless of my personal tastes, I kinda want to know what other people think in regards to this which I know is like throwing steak into a piranha tank but whatever

[snowfolly]

10, 27 and 64 + bonus question of your choosing that you want to answer :3

For the Dragon Age ask game.

Thank you so much for the ask!

10. Share a pic of your favorite OC from any game:

Florence Hawke is my favorite girl bc she is a sarcastic, charming asshole and an unapologetic apostate and she is absolutely unhinged 🥹 (still salty that they didn’t have her hair in DAI lol)

27. Which did you leave behind (Abyss)?: Thankfully in my personal canon world state Alistair is king so I left behind Stroud- but I will say that I ACCIDENTALLY left Hawke the last time I played and she says “I’m sorry, Anders” as she fights the big spider and it broke my heart and I teared up lol. Needless to say I immediately reloaded the game.

64. Favorite achievement: I’m guessing this is for the unlock-able game achievements and I’m going to go with “The Ultimate Sacrifice” simply because I HAVE that achievement and yet I DID NOT actually do the ultimate sacrifice so I’m not sure how that happened so it’s the only impressive one I’ve got 😂

Bonus question! 78. What are you hoping for from DA4: I’m hoping DAD has like 10 fully fleshed out romanceable characters so I can hyperfixate on just one LI that I will romance on every single PT and treat the game like a gory romance simulator (like I do for all of them) :3

#I LOVE DOING THESE GUYS I can talk about dragon age til the cows come home lol #dragon age #dragon age asks #ask meme