#SO YEAH I THINK HE DESERVES THE KINDNESS DESPITE EVERYTHING HES DOING AND DONE. however Ocelot was stupid for falling for that.

[padfootagain]

Only An Almost (V)

Chapter 5: Doubting

Hello!! Here comes a new chapter! There are mentions of sex in this chapter, so a little reminder that this series is not meant to be read by minors. Thank you!

I hope you’ll like this chapter! Please, tell me what you think!

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Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader, friends with benefits AU

Warning: No explicit smut or nsfw content, but there are sexual themes and heavy make-out sessions (it’s a friends with benefits AU, I can’t really escape it), so 18+ only!

Summary: Andrew has been in love with you for years, and yet he has never confessed his feelings. But a night out celebrating the engagement of his best friend changes everything. However, you don't seem ready to be with him just yet. You make him an offer that he can't refuse... but will certainly regret.

Word Count : 2435

Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist

Three weeks passed. You had spent twelve nights together.

Now, Andrew knew every detail of your face as you reached orgasm, the beauty spot on your back he loved kissing, the perfect place across your neck to kiss and nip that made you squirm in his arms, the way the most intimate parts of you tasted, how your legs shook when his fingers touched that spot, how you smelled when he held you close after you were both content and happily floating above the room. He knew you liked to hold his hand right after sex, that you loved when he stroked your back or your cheek to help you ease down into the mortal world, that you took your showers way too hot, that you didn’t like when his beard brushed that part of your ribs because it tickled too much. He had mapped every inch of your body with his eyes, his fingers, his lips, his tongue. He knew how to pleasure you precisely by now, how to read through your breathing what you needed him to do to feel as good as possible, how to worship your body the way you deserved.

And judging by your gestures, you had spotted too that he adored when you kissed his collarbone and his chest. That he had a weak spot at the base of his neck, that he was ticklish right behind his knee, that he melted whenever you dragged your fingertips across his spine, and you tugged on his hair the perfect way nor too harsh nor too soft but the ideal strength that turned him on to no end. You had touched and kissed all of him too by now.

Despite this new intimacy, despite the tenderness with which you held him in your arms as he struggled to find back his breathing, the way you whispered his name in pleasure as if in a prayer, the way you showered him in gentle touches and kisses… you still acted the same as always outside the bedroom.

You talked the same, stood next to him at a perfectly respectable distance, asked him about his day and his mom and his bees the way you had always done, as if… as if there was nothing abnormal. As if he had not heard you shout his name in pleasure the night before. As if you could truly spend nights making love to him and act like nothing had changed, when… everything had changed.

Perhaps he just needed to be patient. You would come around. You would love him, eventually. Besides, he was probably not even the problem at all! You had told him that you didn’t want a relationship, with anyone. The fact that you were still sleeping with him showed that you liked him enough to blur that boundary, despite your decision. Yeah, it was an encouraging sign. If he just… if he just waited, and if he made efforts to make you happy and…

“Andy? You’re alright?”

“Hmmm?”

“You’re okay?”

He blinked back at you. You had put on an old t-shirt again to cover yourself, but he had nothing on. He felt naked, vulnerable, self-conscious. He drew the covers higher across his chest.

“You want some coffee before leaving? It’s pretty late,” you offered, and if there was kindness in the offer, it still broke his heart.

“I… I don’t know. I’m not sure I can drive,” he answered earnestly.

“You can sleep in the guest room, if you want.”

He looked away to hide the tears that gathered in his eyes.

He was inside you ten minutes ago, he had tasted you, touched you, made you unravel under him several times this evening… and all you could give him was the guest bedroom?

It wasn’t just heartbreak, he realized. It was more vicious than that. You made him feel terrible about himself. Did he not mean more to you than that? You could let him do all these things to you… but you couldn’t fall asleep in the same bed? Really?

“No, no, no… it’s okay, I can drive.”

“It’s late, stay the night. You’ll leave tomorrow morning.”

“I’m fine.”

“It’s dangerous, Andy.”

“I said I’m fine.”

You frowned at the harshness of his tone.

“What’s wrong? Did I… Did I do something wrong while we were…”

You left your sentence suspended in mid-air, as if you couldn’t say it. Couldn’t say that you had just had sex with him. What the fuck was wrong with you?

“Sex was amazing, that’s not the problem.”

“What’s the problem, then?”

You seemed to truly have no clue. You seemed genuinely concerned, worried even. Like you cared. Like you cared so fucking much for him. And yet, he was worthy of a moment of pleasure, and the guest bedroom…

“Nothing, I’m sorry. I’m not tired enough to stay, don’t worry. I can drive home.”

“Can you text me, then, when you’re home?”

“Don’t worry…”

“It’s two in the morning, of course I worry.”

He didn’t argue, merely nodded.

He gathered his clothes, got dressed, left without trying to kiss you, he knew you wouldn’t let him.

No kissing without sex.

He was about to fall asleep after mere minutes behind the wheel, so he stopped on the first parking spot he saw. He waited for a plausible time, and texted you.

I’m home.

Your answer buzzed in his pocket right when he was about to fall asleep.

Good to hear. Sleep well, Andy. Xx

He couldn’t keep on doing this for long. Making love to you, and then feeling like shit about himself because you couldn’t bother letting him fall asleep in your bed. Or hold you close. Or kiss you before leaving.

He closed his eyes, unable to decide on what to do next. Should he just call it quits, already? Stop everything and save himself from suffering… but he would stop having you like this too…

His breathing deepened as he finally surrendered.

Sleep well, Andy…

Rugby night at the pub had turned into Sam freaking out about his wedding, and Andrew taking notes about things he needed to help planning.

Luckily, there was no touring planned, no album to be released before the wedding. He had some charity work to be done, Mavis had called for a concert and he couldn’t refuse the woman anything… all in all, there wasn’t to come. Workwise, Andrew was in a writing phase, shutting himself up into his house for hours was most of what would happen in the coming months. He could help to plan the wedding, he had time for it. And considering the level of stress Sam was under, Andrew’s help wouldn’t be too much…

“Daphne started to mention appetizers yesterday… there are like… so many of these… How am I supposed to choose that? I didn’t fucking know there could be so many appetizers?!”

“Sam, calm down, for Christ’s sake! You’re this far from having a stroke.”

“Easy for you to say, Andy! You’re not the one getting married!”

“You have five months, Sam… Five months. There is plenty of time for you to choose your appetizers.”

“Add it to the list. How many things do we have to plan?”

“Hmmm… I think I’m up to twenty…eight. Twenty-eight things.”

“God… why did I ask Daphne to marry me…”

Andrew opened his mouth to offer a joke, but Sam shushed him with a raised finger.

“Rhetorical question. Don’t.”

“Come on, relax, Sam. You’ll be perfectly fine. Everyone else manages to plan a wedding, you can too.”

“Not everyone else… don’t you remember the fiasco that my uncle’s wedding was?”

“I sang at that wedding!”

“That was the only decent part in the entire day.”

“Thanks, Sam.”

“You were seventeen, don’t get ahead of yourself, you were still pretty shite.”

“Ha, there you go. I thought someone had replaced you with some weird doppelgänger stuff. Or a clone, even.”

“Android?”

“Or organic.”

“Did I grow in a tube?”

“Yeah… with the disgusting liquid.”

“Nice…”

The two friends exchanged a smile.

“Please, stop being so worried. Your wedding will be amazing. Besides… who cares about appetizers? The important part is you marrying the love of your life.”

“I know that this comes from a very romantic point of view, but that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. You’ve met my mom. God, you’ve met Daphne’s mom… anything goes wrong, it’ll be the bloody apocalypse!”

“We’ll find your body somewhere in Wicklow…”

“In the bog.”

“Tragic. I can see the headlines already…”

“I’m sure you’ll have a lovely speech for my funerals, though.”

“Absolutely not. I’ll reveal my true feelings about you, gobshite.”

Sam couldn’t keep the act up any longer, and both him and Andrew exploded with laughter.

“I’m picturing your mother just… shouting at you about appetizers,” Andrew laughed, choking and tears pearling at the corners of his eyes as he doubled over.

Sam was barely breathing at this point, throwing his entire body backwards against the chair.

It took the two of them a moment to calm down. When he looked at his friend again, Sam’s gaze was full of fondness.

“I’m sorry to bother you about that while we could be watching rugby with the rest of the lads.”

“It’s alright. You’re stressed. Besides, I don’t have a real job, plenty of time on my hands to handle your nervous breakdowns.”

“True! You parasite.”

“Absolute junk of our society.”

“Nothing productive coming from you, that’s for sure.”

“I shout very loudly though, it ought to be worth something.”

“Well, apparently, it’s worth millions.”

“Do you want me to shout at your wedding?”

Sam’s lips curled into a smile.

“Aren’t you too expensive for a poor lad like me.”

“Undoubtedly. But if you promise to quit freaking out about appetizers, I might yield.”

“It would be amazing. Thank you, Andy. I’d love for you to sing. Actually, we’ve been talking about it with Daphne… could you do Work Song for our first dance?”

“It would be an honour. Of course, I can.”

“We were hesitating with Cherry Wine…”

“Don’t do this to me, Sam.”

They both exploded with laughter again.

“Don’t do this to me. I will never understand…”

“Don’t people just… listen to the lyrics?” nodded Sam.

“I don’t know, man…” Andrew heaved a sigh. “Sometimes they just kill me.”

His phone buzzed, and there was your name on it. Printed there in the pixels. He didn’t check your text, even though he wanted to.

“Andy?”

“Hmm?”

“What’s going on between you and Y/N?”

Andrew averted his gaze, drank some of his beer. On the screen at the back of the pub, Ireland was earning three points with penalty kick. People were shouting, and it was loud and merry.

“What do you mean? Nothing’s going on,” Andrew answered, a terrible liar.

“You’ve been weird.”

“I’m always weird.”

“True, but not the usual weird. You’re not on the ‘I love her and I’m too much of a fool to tell her’ kind of weird, you’re on a ‘I feel like shite’ kind of weird.”

“Both miserable situations…”

“True. But then, you’re a moron, it doesn’t help.”

“Thanks for the compliment.”

Andrew heaved a sigh.

“I can’t tell you about it. She asked me not to tell you about it.”

“So… something did happen between you and Y/N.”

There was a pregnant pause.

“You can’t tell anyone about this, Sam. I’m serious.”

“Of course, I promise.”

“Not even Daphne.”

“Don’t push it. There are no secrets between us.”

“Sam… please… it’s not your secret, it’s mine.”

He heaved a sigh, but Sam nodded anyway.

“What’s wrong then?”

Andrew struggled to swallow when he lifted his glass of Guiness up to his lips.

“Y/N and I, we… we’ve slept together.”

Sam’s eyebrows shot up to his hairline.

“What?! But… that’s amazing!”

“Is it?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?” retorted Sam, taken-aback.

Andrew heaved a painful sigh and rubbed his eyes.

“Because she doesn’t want to be in a relationship.”

“Oh.”

“So, we’ve agreed on some kind of… friends with benefits situation. And I… I’m starting to regret it.”

“You bet. Damn… why the fuck would you agree to something like that, though? You’re crazy about the woman!”

“I know, I know… I thought… I thought that she would… I don’t know what I thought. It was that or nothing, and I guess I imagined that having a part of her was better than not having her at all. I was wrong. This is fucking killing me.”

Andrew buried his head in his hands.

“What the fuck did I do, Sam? What did I do? And what the fuck do I do now?”

“Do you want this to go on?”

Andrew shook his head no, face still in his palms.

“Then, tell her you want it to stop.”

“I don’t want this to stop. I don’t want… not to have her. I want to date her.”

“Tell her that then.”

“She explicitly told me that she didn’t want to date anyone. If I say that, she’ll just… leave. She won’t say yes.”

“You need to speak to her. It won’t end well for you, Andy. What if she feels the same?”

“I’ll wait for her,” Andrew answered without a hesitation. “I’ll wait as long as she needs.”

“Then tell her that.”

But Andrew blinked back some tears as he painfully rubbed at his palms.

“What if she doesn’t feel the same?  What then?”

“Then… you’ll move on. It will only mean that she isn’t the one.”

Andrew slowly nodded, resting his chin in his palm and his elbow on the table, but he didn’t seem convinced, and indeed, he wasn’t. What if he lost you for good then? What if you never wanted to see him again? Was it worth it?

“You’re going to do something stupid, I can feel it,” Sam sighed with a shake of his head.

“No…”

“You’re going to ignore my advice.”

“No, I… I’m weighing the pros and the cons.”

“And?”

“And I agree that I can’t handle my relationship with Y/N being just about sex. But I am also terrified at the thought that she will reject me for good. Cause I… I don’t think I could still be her friend. Not after… knowing her that way.”

“Can I be brutally honest?”

“As if you aren’t always…”

“You’ve seriously fucked up accepting this situation with her…”

“Don’t I know it.”

Sam stared at his friend for a moment.

“You really do love her, don’t you?”

Andrew settled an empty stare on his beer.

“Yeah… Yeah, I’m afraid I do.”

#hozier #the hoziest #andrew hozier byrne #hozier x reader #hozier x y/n #hozier x you #hozier x fem!reader #hozier fanfiction #hozier fanfic #hozier series #series #fanfic #fanfiction #writing

[riality-check]

part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4 part 5

Steve wakes up early like he usually does. The sun is streaming through his window right into his eyes, his sheets are bunched at his waist, and Eddie is snoring way too close to his right ear.

Steve doesn’t move.

He glances at the clock. It’s early enough that Eddie would complain about the time even if he got a good amount of sleep last night. But he didn’t. Neither of them did, and Eddie had a panic attack on top of that, so he’s exhausted.

He deserves the sleep, so Steve lets him have it.

Steve, however, is still on a swimmer’s schedule even after two years of post-graduation life. He gets up and tries not to focus on last night.

They say nothing good happens after midnight, but nothing good happens before noon, either. Breakfast seems like a good first step, at least, before they sit down and talk.

Really talk, not huddle and cry on a hardwood floor.

Yeah. Steve needs food before they have that conversation.

He heads downstairs, where he sees Nancy sitting at the kitchen table, steaming cup of coffee in front of her.

Before he can say anything along the lines of “I thought you left” or “how did you figure out the coffeemaker, it took me two months to work the damn thing out,” Nancy points at the coffeemaker and says, “Yours should be done in about a minute. Light roast, right?”

“Yeah,” Steve says. His parents like dark roast. Despite both of them drinking it, that container is more full than the light roast. Steve’s gone through a container of his coffee since they last replaced theirs. He doesn’t even drink coffee all that often.

Sure enough, the coffeemaker finishes brewing, and Steve gingerly grabs his scorching mug and sits across from Nancy.

She still has her curlers in. He’d tease her for it if she didn’t look so exhausted.

He takes a peek into her mug. It’s half empty, but he can see that it’s dark.

“Dark roast, black?” he asks.

Nancy nods.

Nice to know some things haven’t changed since ‘83. Good that that coffee is getting used up.

“You know light roast has more caffeine, right?”

“I like the taste,” Nancy says. She takes a sip of it without grimacing, and Steve marvels at her.

He doesn’t think he’ll ever stop doing that, not really.

“I thought you left,” he says instead.

Nancy shrugs. “I was too tired to drive. My parents are out of town this weekend, anyway, and it’s not like Mike can use the car. I crashed on the couch. The blankets are in the wash right now.”

“I don’t care about the blankets,” Steve says. It’s true. They’re kind of ugly, too. Some gifts his great-aunt made for his parents’ wedding anniversary, he thinks. They’re warm though, and he likes that at least someone got some use out of them.

“Are you okay?” he asks.

Nancy stares at him, but Steve knows she isn’t really looking at him. She’s just thinking.

“I think so,” she says after a minute. “Or at least I will be in a little while.”

Steve nods.

“Are you okay?” she asks.

“No,” Steve says instantly. “I need at least a day, I think.”

“Yeah,” Nancy says. She takes another sip of coffee. “Last night was a lot.”

Steve sighs. “Yeah. It was.”

He picks up the mug and when he registers it’s not hot enough to make him want to immediately drop it, takes a sip of his coffee. It’s bitter as anything, and that’s when he realizes he forgot to add-

“Milk and two sugars?” Nancy offers. She’s already up, having gotten the milk from the fridge, and now stands on her tiptoes, trying to reach the sugar bowl in the cabinet to the left of the stove.

“I got it.” Steve pushes himself out of his chair, but by the time he’s on his feet, Nancy has the sugar bowl in hand and is setting it, along with the milk and a spoon, on the table.

Steve is both surprised and not that she remembered where everything is.

He adds both to his coffee, stirs it with the spoon, and takes a sip to make sure it’s actually good this time.

It is. Milk and two sugars never fails.

Nancy finishes her coffee and rinses the mug out in the sink. Then, she turns back to Steve.

“Do you think,” she says, tugging at the sleeves of her shirt, “that talking to someone might help you, too?”

Out of all the questions Nancy could possibly ask him, that wasn’t even on Steve’s radar.

He’d be lying if he said that he didn’t think about it. After everything, especially Starcourt, Steve knew he wasn’t quite all right. People who are okay don’t have nightmares that often, or get way too on edge because of flickering lights or Russian.

But that always seemed like a leap he couldn’t quite take. Therapy is for people who really aren’t okay. It’s something that isn’t talked about, not just in polite company, but possibly ever.

Steve doesn’t know if he’s reached that point yet.

But he’d be lying if he said he didn’t think about it.

He doesn’t voice any of this. He just takes a sip of his coffee. Swallows.

Says, “That really seemed to scare Eddie. When I brought it up.”

Nancy sits back down at the table. “Yeah. I’m surprised he didn’t go off more since he was already on edge.”

Oh. So she knew. And Steve didn’t.

“I don’t think you can be too mad about that,” Nancy says, and that’s when Steve realizes he was frowning. “You’d tell Robin something like that before you’d tell Eddie.”

Steve opens his mouth to reply, and, when he finds that he really can’t argue with that, closes it again.

“You could try asking him about it, though,” Nancy says. “He might tell you. I won’t, since it’s not my story, but he might tell you.”

“And if he doesn’t?”

“Well, if it were me, I would press,” Nancy says. “But you’re not me, and that’s not the right thing to do, I don’t think. I think you just need to wait until he does.”

Steve nods. He’s not the world’s most patient person, but he thinks he can wait if it’s Eddie he’s waiting for.

“You didn’t answer my question, though,” Nancy says.

“What question?”

“Do you think talking to someone would help?”

Steve swallows and stays silent. He can feel Nancy’s eyes on him. He knows she’s not doing it on purpose, that she can’t shut off that intense stare of hers, but it makes him feel like a bug underneath a microscope anyway.

“How about this?” Nancy says after the silence stretches too thin. “How about we tell each other?”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, we tell each other if it gets bad. We have to tell the other two, not just one other person.”

“What about Robin?” Steve says.

“Her too,” Nancy replies instantly. She isn’t brushing him off. Steve can tell that she means it, that she might even feel a little bit bad for not including her in the first place.

“We tell the other three,” Nancy says, “if it gets bad. That way, we share the load better. And it’s less scary.”

It is less scary. Steve knows Robin better than he knows anyone on the planet, is learning more about Eddie every day, and used to be able to read Nancy’s mind.

He wonders if he’ll be able to get there again with her. He hopes so. Really, he does.

“I think that could work,” he says.

The smallest of grins appears on Nancy’s face. “It’s less expensive, too. For Eddie and Robin.”

Steve is a little embarrassed that he didn’t think about that factor.

“We have to be honest, though,” he says. “No bullshit.”

“No bullshit,” Nancy agrees. Then, she adds, “You were never bullshit. By the way.”

Steve nods. Smiles. Downs the rest of his coffee and stands up.

“Thanks, Nance,” he says.

“I should have said it before.”

“Maybe. I’m just happy you said it all. You didn’t have to.”

Nancy frowns at the floor. “No, I did.”

Steve doesn’t like the look on her face, so he changes the subject. “I’m gonna start up breakfast.”

“Eddie’s gonna want-”

“Pancakes with sprinkles,” the two of them say in unison.

Nancy grins, and it’s less shy, this time. “He steals all my candy, you know.”

“You don’t like most candy,” Steve points out. He walks over to the pantry and pulls out the box mix and sprinkles.

Nancy keeps smiling and just shrugs.

“Eggos, still?” Steve asks. 

He turns around and sees that Nancy already has the freezer door open and the box in hand. He hears Eddie’s footsteps come down the stairs. He remembers that Robin is gonna come over in a few hours for their weekly “bridge and bitch” afternoon.

Yeah. He thinks they might be okay.

ao3 link

tag list:  @ashwagandalf @novelnovella @ladyapplejackdnd @silentiumdelirium @resident-gay-bitch @brassreign @starrystevie @henderdads @greyhoundsgirl @thegingerrapunzel @seths-rogens @questionablequeeries @miss-hit @edmunsn @readbythestarlight @scooby-dum86 @deehellcat @missarte-beltane @theysherobinbuckley @tillystealeaves @mercrx @nightmareglitter 

#ria writes #smin au #part six of six #we're done!! #angst with a happy ending #thank you all for sticking with me through this madness #i'm planning on revising it all #and throwing it on ao3 #sometime soon #so keep an eye out for that!! #real tags now #nancy wheeler #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #platonic stancy #platonic eddie munson and nancy wheeler #steddie ficlet #stranger things #stranger things ficlet #st #st ficlet

[loren91]

This blog is kinda new and I haven’t done a post like this before, but as someone who works with film, I have a lot of thoughts, and I’d like to go on a little filmmaking rant regarding Young Royals, or more precisely, the critique of Wilhelm’s character.

The past few years there’s been a trend in films to have the main protagonist be strong, flawless and morally perfect from start to finish. I’ve never really understood this, because that way you are actively blocking any opportunity for good character development. If you want a character to be interesting or undergo some kind of journey of growth, they have to start out in a somewhat bad place. As a viewer, I honestly find it a bit insulting too, because a filmmaker who doesn’t dare to take risks or write nuanced characters are essentially saying “I don’t trust my audience”, and that’s how you end up with boring films.

Now in regards to Young Royals and Wilhelm, I keep seeing critiques popping up across platforms, like “Wilhelm is selfish”/“he’s a bad person”/“he’s toxic”, even to the point of saying that the whole show is toxic. And in a sense, yeah, Wilhelm is kind of a bad person, and you can give all kinds of explanations for it. He’s a teen and a product of the environment he was brought up in. Considering the fact that both Wilhelm and August have grown up in the same kind of toxic upper class-elite culture, I’d be more surprised if he wasn’t at least a little bit of a douchebag (There’s a reason why they gave him an anxiety disorder, to make him more relatable and worthy of our sympathy) There’s a lot of expectations on him, from his family and his peers. And he’s terrified of the consequences if he were to break those expectations, that’s why he’s so complicit. But most importantly, his flaws are there for narrative reasons. 

If you want to figure out if a piece of work is morally questionable or not, you have to look beyond just one character. The million dollar question here is, are the characters rewarded despite bad behaviour?

Let me set an example here with 1984’s Ghostbusters (an odd one I know, but hear me out!) The romantic subplot between Peter and Dana is incredibly poorly written. When Dana shows up at their office, asking for help, Peter doesn't take her seriously and only attempts to flirt. He also stalks her and tries to pressure her into dating him, and despite her saying no several times over, he doesn't back off. Then at the end, when Peter and his team have saved the city from the big evil ghost, he thinks he deserves Dana as a reward. He kisses her (without checking for consent) and the film tries to frame this as romantic. Peter is rewarded despite his bad behaviour. I don’t care about anyone's nostalgia for this film, it’s gross af.

Now, let’s compare this to YR. Wilhelm is constantly going back and forth on his relationship with Simon. He keeps pushing him away, only to pull him in moments later when he’s too weak to resist his feelings any longer. Simon has a lot of patience with Wilhelm because he understands that he’s in a complicated situation. Also, red flags are difficult to see when you’ve got those rose tinted glasses on..

However, all of this is there really only to build up for one scene, the break up behind Simon’s house in ep 6. Wilhelm has hurt Simon several times over at this point, and he’s exhausted. But Wilhelm tries to ask for his reward anyway. 

“I’m really sorry, this was the only way. But, this doesn’t have to change what we’ve got. We’re still us.”

But Simon calls him out for it.

“You expect everything to be on your terms. You need to figure out what you want… You need to do it on your own, I don’t want to be anyone’s secret.”

Effectively telling Wilhelm that his days of avoiding responsibility and taking people for granted are over. Simon won’t stand for it anymore. Wilhelm is being punished for his bad behaviour.

Wilhelm is the main protagonist of the story, meaning we see the story progress mainly from his perspective. It’s really important to remember though, that just because a character is the protagonist doesn’t mean that they’re the hero. Wilhelm is certainly not a hero, but it’s still his journey of growth and self discovery, that’s what makes the story interesting.

We get to see just how much these boys love each other and how happy they are together, but their situation is too complicated and they are terrified, which leads to Wilhelm making some questionable choices. The script however makes sure that the characters pay for their less than ideal actions, and not just with Wilhelm. 

-When Simon attacks August because he refuses to pay, Rosh makes sure to call him out. 

-When Sara finds out he’s been seeing their dad behind her back and lying to her about it for months, she calls him out for it. 

-When August kisses Sara in the stables, Felice breaks up with him.

-When Wilhelm finds out August recorded the video, he disowns him.

And so on.

All of this stuff is really crucial for their development as characters. Learning through their mistakes. That’s why the last hug and love confession outside the church is so damn important, it’s concrete evidence of Wilhelm’s character development. He’s far from done, but that’s why we’re getting season 2! It’s most likely gonna be a rather bumpy ride, but the boy just needs more time. Who knows, maybe he’ll end up being the hero of the story eventually.

YR is so well done and I could go on for hours about this kind of stuff, but that will have to do for now, bye 😅

#young royals #Prince Wilhelm #simon eriksson #august #film theory #sorry for the rant #my analysis

[lunestael]

Itafushi vs. Satosugu Analysis

Posed with this question on twitter which had me go like “yeah thats not gonna happen.”

“If Megumi and Yuji end up the same as Gojo and Geto... what are we going to do? “

disclaimer: just using their ship names in reference to the relationship dynamic between the characters in canon, not connotating a romantic relationship

I feel like satosugu and itafushi are specifically portrayed to be foils of each other, to compare the ways that itfs excels in what stsg failed at (honest communication and being sensitive to each other’s feelings, acceptance of each other despite differences in philosophy, etc)

Both itfs and stsg have pivotal philosophical debates on what their personal beliefs surrounding “saving people” entails, which narratively serves to establish each person’s character and goals as jujutsu sorcerers. however, despite being about a similar topic, they are approached completely differently.

fushiguro claims “selfish” reasons for saving people, saving those he personally believes deserved to be saved, because he isn’t some kind of righteous hero, hes just a jujutsu sorcerer, and he does not want to save someone who will just cause harm others in the future.

itadori, on the other hand, maintains the belief that all humans deserve to life a normal life and die a normal death, regardless of what they have done, or will do. If someone were in trouble, and you were the only one capable of saving them, itadori’s belief is that you should try your best to save them. 

Both of them acknowledge this difference in philosophy, but interestingly enough neither disagree with each other’s conviction either. They find the meaning and think about each other’s positions in life that made them come to their own separate conclusions, and respect it even if it doesn’t exactly align with their own, with itadori stating that even if their philosophies are different, doesn’t mean they can’t both be right.

itafushi consistently seek to understand each other’s perspective and put themselves in each other’s shoes. This makes them more empathetic and more willing to listen and understand those they care about. 

stsg have always struggled with this from the beginning. Gojo and Fushiguro have relatively the same philosophy, as do Itadori and Geto (i could do a whole other analysis comparing gojo vs megumi as well as itadori vs. geto goddd) regarding the concept of saving people, though Gojo is much more crass about it than Fushiguro was, most likely to bait Geto into a fight, which Geto easily falls for. Even though they’re close and inseparable friends and the self-named “strongest duo”, there are clear moral lines that divide the two that they use to push against each other. I mean, they literally escalate into a near physical duel over it in not even two pages. 

on another note, gojo has been noted by gege to have relied on geto as a moral compass. your own moral and ethical code being dictated by another person can be extremely unhealthy and become manipulative. gojo saw geto as the pinnacle of morality (which is ironic considering his moral decisions a year later) to the point where whether gojo would massacre an entire religious group all depended on geto’s response at that moment. 

meanwhile geto had his own inner idealization of gojo as the strongest alone, not in the way the rest of the world perceived him, but in his own way as the supposed other half of the strongest duo. you can feel a certain sense of...envy or resentment when geto wishes he were gojo so he could achieve the society he gave up everything for, even though he was supposed to be the strongest WITH gojo. thats how far he felt from gojo without gojo realizing he had felt that way.

satosugu overall have a lot of misconceptions about each other they accept as inherent truths though they never actually confirmed, some of which are realized too late, others never revealed at all.

megumi could almost immediately tell when yuji had gone through some trauma as soon as he saw him alive again, and immediately brought it up to make sure he was okay, which even though yuji was not okay, it was a huge gesture from megumi to stay emotionally in touch with yuji when he can see him struggling.

gojo, however, doesn’t notice when the same thing happens to suguru, though he does notice something is off with suguru. not to say that it was satoru’s responsibility to bring suguru from the brink of his mental break, but rather it shows how their wavelengths are no longer as in sync as they used to be. with satoru having suguru as his moral compass as well, satoru may also have some doubts that suguru would have his own moral struggles since he depends on him to always make the right and just choices (oh the tragic irony...)

TLDR; itafushi tackle their differences and issues with each other with open arms and seeking to understand each other with honesty. they don’t apply a codependent attitude towards each other, being very close and understanding without idealizations of each other beyond reason. itafushi are just raw truths to each other from the beginning. satosugu...have a lot of internal issues they never bring to each other and just let fester until the dam breaks. they have preconceptions about each other and idealize each other without communicating them to each other, adopting both an unhealthy codependent relationship without proper communications. 

i think itafushi have a much better foundation of support to survive whatever ordeals they will undergo, and most likely be able to pull each other from their respective brinks when they come compared to satosugu’s tragic end.

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #itafushi #satosugu #jjk meta #itadori yuji #fushiguro megumi #gojo satoru #geto suguru #this is not any this ship is better than this ship debate either!!! so lets not bring it there!!!! #all of my otps are wildly obsessive and unhealthy and toxic and that is simply how i like it <3 #sorry if this post is a mess i started this months ago and then work killed my ass!!! #i just want to get this out of my drafts

[echantedtoon]

Still Loving You

He'll still love her even if she never feels the same. Even if it'll always be one sided.

(I like this ship a lot even if a lot of people don't. So here's a pretty small oneshot for it.)

He loved her from the moment he met her. Maggie. He thought she was the most beautiful creature in New York or anywhere else on the earth for that matter. It's why he went to help her after she first got captured.

"There you are!"

"Stay back! Somebody help me!"

Even if she rejected him there, he knew she was scared. She needed his help still. He brought her unconscious body home where she was safe. Much safer than that laboratory.

"It's ok. You're among friends."

"This is safe? I need a cure! I'm not a monster!"

"We're not monsters either. Don't be afraid."

Even after...She still saw him that way. Even after she ran back to Xanatoes. Betraying his kindness and insisting on following her still trying to help. Still trying to make everything right again.

"Maggie, wait!"

She still ran from him in fear. Accusing eyes staring at him despite him coming back to help. 

"Why are you afraid of me? I want to help you."

"No you don't! You want me to stay a monster like you!"

She ran from him. Attacked him even. Manipulated by fear and Xanatoes. But he could do nothing. Only accept the reality of it all.

"She doesn't want our help...She doesn't want me."

Things did get better for the both of them. He faced new challenges in his life. She fell in love with someone else. It hurts. His chest still felt heavy thinking about it or worse seeing it. He was always excited to see her again even if it was just a social call. Even if they were on better terms more friendly now. Seeing her loving Derek was...Hard. But he would still help her. Even when she came to him for help having no one else to turn to.

"Maggie?"

"Fang's taken over the Labyrinth. He's got all sorts of weapons, and Talon-...I couldn't help him."

She let him embrace her. To comfort her fears and worries before he left to help her. It was all he wanted because deep down he still loved her. Which is why...even if he could've been selfish and tried to have her for himself, he made the choice to let her go. To help save her actual love because in the end he loved her seeing her happy. And bring with him wouldn't bring her that happiness she deserved after everything she went through.

"What makes you think I'd go with you and leave Derek?!"

"Then stay with him for all I care! I'm sure you'll make wonderful cellmates!"

She had been disgusted by his words but once she saw the key to her love's freedom in her hands, her face looked at him in hope and understanding. 

"Yeah. I thought that would shut you up. Now say goodbye to your boyfriend and let's go."

He saw her release him. Run back to his arms. And both expressed emense thanks and appreciation to him for everything he's done for them both. He was happy for them. He really was. He was happy Maggie was happy. Happy she found someone who loved and cared about her so much even if it wasn't him. Happy that was she was happy. But it still hurts. Even now years later. Both having moved on. Both having children. Their own families now. He even found love in someone else. However there will always be the small part of him that'll look at her and miss her. Wonder what could have been. After all..

He'll still love her even if she never feels the same. Even if it'll always be one sided.

#Disney Gargoyles #gargoyles #gargoyles brooklyn #Gargoyles Maggie #maggie the cat #Brooklyn x Maggie

[freedfromthegalactichivemind]

Okay, browsing another fandom-tag, (the thing I am newly becoming RE-obsessed with, my longstanding decades old fandom re-emerging due to shiny new material)... well... I found something that made me think of THIS fandom and how ridiculous it is sometimes and how ridiculous fandom can be about certain things.   Take a look at this reblogged image on my other sideblog: Classic Trigun Official Art.   Its kind of spoilery for those who haven’t seen the 1998 original anime series, but it’s non-canonical at, anyway.  At least, I think it’s non-canon art.  However, it is official, as in, it’s not canon art / not an image from the actual anime, but it is promotional, a kind of post-series funsies thing done by crew.   The pale-haired guy in the space-suit there?  The one who’s got the smiling spiky-haired guy’s arm wrapped around him?  He’s the series’ main villain.  He’s also a genocidal maniac with a deep hated of humanity who has murdered millions of people.  He of course is here, in this funsie official / adjacent art shown in the trope of a “reforming villain” with heroic-characters including the main (Vash with his arm arround him - twin brother) gladly hanging out with him.  Anyway, my point is that - hey, look at the actual official although non-canonical art of the “defanged villain” trope - done for fun, to show a villain being begrudgingly good / implied to be on his way to reformation post series, etc.  Silly promo / bonus art.   It made me think about how She-Ra fandom had the Catra vs. Hordak wars and how some people / factions were just AGAHST at the idea that some of us fan-critters loved to contemplate redemption arcs and do fanart and fanfic that defanged the villains and so forth.  While people don’t seem to mind it much for Horde Prime - people doing sexy or silly fanart with him to scratch that itch for a “defanged dark lord” fun time, people got really bent out of shape for a while for both Hordak and Catra, didn’t they?  In the Hordak fan-faction (hi there, where I make my bed, or my clone-pod, as it were) there were a lot of people who hated Catra, thought of her as taking time away from their blorbo and who considered her “too toxic” for Adora and made this big honking serious deal out of it.  Fanfics about Catra fucking off to the Crirmson Waste alone and whatnot... I actually don’t mind pairing Adora with other people, it’s just that some of the “Catra cannot be redeeeeeemed!” stuff got a little obnoxious for me, even though I, myself, got sick and fucking tired of overzealous Catra-stans calling me a genocidal colonist for liking Hordak.   And of course, um, Hordak.  A villain portrayed with some sympathy and human emotions, despite being an actual dictator trying to conquer a planet. Yeah, Hordak’s done a lot of fucked up things, like employing torture and execution-by-exile in his reign.  I like him, anyway, because of those sympathetic points - the clone-cult stuff, the sense that he has a desire to be wanted and loved despite everything (thank you, Entrapta).  And, well, I LOVE the idea of post-canon, of “Lets let him live a cute domestic life with Entapta and lets dress him in sweaters and have him discover how delicious mangoes are, the poor cult-denied big fruit bat!”   And, well, there was a big row among people about liking these characters, something of a sympathy-contest of who “deserves more sympathy” and whatnot.  I was sitting here the whole time going “Let me enjoy my defanged dark lord trope in peace.”   Meanwhile, back in my old fandom, which I have returned to... it’s like “Oh, yeah, there’s official art of the actual literal genocidal maniac who canonically has a very graphic 100K+ body count being domesticated by the good guys, not to mention what the fandom does and the thirst some fans have for this guy”  and it’s like.... “Whoa, anime fandoms just be more chill than American cartoon fandoms, don’t they?”    No one accuses you of wanting to erase humanity because you enjoy Millions Knives, so why do people accuse you of being a real life abuser or colonial apologist if you enjoy Catra or Hordak?  

#fandom comparisons #villains #villain tropes #defanged dark lord #catra #hordak #the catra vs. hordak wars #spop discourse #trigun #anime #deep apologies for people on the trigun tag who aren't into she-ra #this is my dumb she-ra blog #for my actual trigun blog go to lost-technology

[neoct18]

— YES OR NO?

pairing: hyunjin x reader

warnings: profanity, angst

You’d been warned off Hwang Hyunjin since the beginning.

He had a clique full of guy friends that all looked too good to be true, a killer smile, an even deadlier glare, and a habit of always chewing gum.

To help him quit smoking, they’d said, but you’d caught him in the act one time, during after-school hours. He’d smirked, a devilish curve painting his lips, before motioning for you to be quiet with his index finger.

Most of the time he’d conceal his anger with his signature cunning smile, but a lot of the times he’d just lose it in the middle of the hallways and beat some poor student up for something insignificant.

You had heard about rooftop fights too, that ended in his knuckles looking all bruised when he got back to the classroom, and the teacher always sent him to that office where you think didn’t even do anything for him.

You had heard about rooftop fights too, that ended in his knuckles looking all bruised when he got back to the classroom, and the teacher always sent him to that office where you think didn’t even do anything for him.

Hyunjin was not a mystery, despite his questionable choices. He was an open book; blunt, and straight-to-the-point. You knew he hated beating around the bush, and that’s why you’d seen him receiving his punishments so easily.

Almost like he knew he deserved them. Like he wanted them.

That was the weird thought that bugged you. How fucked up could he be to just do what he did for the hell of it? What was he gaining from that?

Your second encounter with him seemed coincidental, almost. You’d gone to the rooftop to get some homework done and to get away from all the noise and the gossip, and he was already there, sitting in your spot, eyes wandering over the city beneath you.

You decided against saying something as you sat opposite him, ignoring him completely, yet always remaining so very alert of him.

He’d glanced at you once, before looking up at the cloudy sky. He took up so much space with his long legs and wide shoulders, he made it absolutely impossible not to be conscious of his every move. You wanted to tell him off for that.

You didn’t want to spot him first in a crowd full of students, you wished your ears didn’t perk up at the mention of his name, you wished you never saw him that day in the parking lot.

But most of all you wished you didn’t like him. Because you did. He was everything wrong, yet you wanted all of it.

You wanted that kindness that came with coldness, you wanted those empty but sweet compliments he threw at girls so nonchalantly; you wanted to be noticed, the way you noticed him.

“It’s driving me crazy, that.” You looked up, at him, surprised. “What you’re doing.”

His calm posture, the way he was sitting, were such a contrast to his fiery gaze. Dark brows furrowed, side bangs shadowing his face so handsomely—

He’d said something.

“What am I doing?” You could feel your heart beating fast in your chest.

“Biting your lips when reading. They’re swollen now. Red.” He never took his eyes off you, and you didn’t dare avert yours either.

You wanted this, however small it was.

“Oh,” you couldn’t think to form a coherent sentence, but then again you didn’t even know what to say to that.

He just admitted to staring at you when you weren’t looking. You didn’t even know you had the habit of biting your lips. The fact that he’d noticed was yours; it felt private now.

“You’ve a boyfriend, don’t you? I’ve seen you two around. His name...Yeonjun, right?”

He sounded so indifferent speaking your on and off boyfriend’s name. Like he didn’t really care, or... he did. Those burning dark eyes told a different story, it wasn’t your mind playing games.

You shook your head, both as an answer and to clear your thoughts. You closed your textbook and turned around to face the endless sky and the tall buildings of Seoul.

“He’s not my boyfriend. But yeah, Yeonjun.”

He chuckled. “Figured. He’s not the dating type.”

You didn’t answer. You knew that.

After a small pause he spoke again. “You like me, don’t you?”

Your heart skipped a beat, your eyes flying to meet his. He was sporting a lopsided grin, a teasing one.

Had it been obvious? Was he playing with you? Or is he just fishing around?

“Full of yourself, aren’t you?” Sarcasm was your defense mechanism. You went into autopilot in situations like this.

He moved, that grin never disappearing. “I was asking a question. It’s up to you whether it’s true or not.”

You thought long and hard about what to reply to that. What would it mean admitting your little crush? He wouldn’t tease you, you were sure about that. Hyunjin was more serious than people gave him credit for. But you were exposing yourself here. Was that safe to do?

You had been warned after all. He’ll break your heart. You still remember your now best friend saying this to you the first time she noticed you staring holes into his back. He has the worst temper. He did. He did, but—

“Where... Where did that come from?” You sounded so breathless, you wanted to slap yourself.

He climbed off the rail bar he was sitting on, and took a couple steps towards you, hands in his pockets, eyes trying to intimidate you.

You weren’t about to back down.

“Simple question, wasn’t it, (Y/N)? Yes or no,” he continued in that soothing, deep voice.

You swallowed, taking a step back. “Why does it matter to you?”

He shrugged, took another step. His aura was calm, so you weren’t feeling as nervous as you thought you’d feel. Talking about your feelings was always hard for you.

“Well the question does revolve around me, so I’d like to know. Will you let me know?”

You’d play along.

“You seem to know a lot, I’m sure you can answer your own question.”

He chuckled, his eyes disappearing even with that small movement. It was cute how his eyes would form crescent moons when he smiled. But then again—he probably knows that as well.

“Trying to beat me in my own game? I knew I wouldn’t waste my time.”

You rolled your eyes, and decided to open your textbook again. You had homework to do, and a future to look forward, unlike reckless bad boy over there.

“Thank you, your humble highness,” you retorted sarcastically.

“You do love getting on my nerves, don’t you?”

“Do I? I hadn’t noticed,” your tone was bored, and you hoped that would trigger him to do something.

He moved in your peripheral vision, and suddenly you felt cold fingers grabbing your chin. You held your breath and panicked, thinking you’d gone too far, but—you met his very serious gaze.

There’s a word for what passed between the two of you then, a special sort of feeling when this kind of thing happens.

But it seemed he’d stolen all your words.

“I’ve liked you since the first moment I noticed you. And you wanted me to notice you, didn’t you? That’s how I feel all the time.

‘What the fuck do I do to get her to pay attention to me?’ Like a fucking loser. Did you know that?”

You were going to die, you just knew it. Your heart was going to explode from how fast it was beating.

“Did I know you’re a loser?” Your mouth ran faster than your thoughts, sometimes.

The contact was lost immediately. Your skin where he’d touched you was on fire; you were on fire. Burning away under those eyes, that penetrating stare that appeared wounded from your words.

Had you crossed a line? Was Hwang Hyunjin…hurt? This was too much, all at once.

Most of all, you had no idea you’d feel this sorry for hurting him, no matter how you thought your words held no power over him.

They did. They fucking did, you see it now, clear as day.

“That seems to be the general opinion, doesn’t it?” He pulled back, bitter smirk in place, walls building that familiar fortress of his back up.

Standing his full height, he appeared so impenetrable, just the thought of trying to get closer was absolutely terrifying. You wanted to, so badly.

You had to. This was the chance. Apologize, reach out.

“I’m sorry,” you started, softly. “I didn’t mean that.”

He took another step back, a dry chuckle escaping his throat. “You don’t have to apologize, sweetheart. No one else does.”

“I’m not everybody else, though, am I?”

Your eyes met again. His lips parted, an answer forming, then getting lost midway. His hands moved in his pockets, a decision being made, before he took a sharp breath, and made the stride, finally, finally—

Long fingers gripped your shoulders and pulled you up into him, onto him, his mouth devouring yours. You shut your eyes, your heart at once escaping you, all thoughts lost, except him, everywhere, everywhere—

Your hands circled his neck, pulling in, closer, please, please. He made a noise against your lips, what sounded like your name, and one of his hands travelled to your waist, tugging.

Oh, it was vertigo. How had you missed this? How was it possible to want someone this much?

When he pulled away, it was the greatest loss you’d ever known.

Breathless, his forehead fell against yours, his eyes piercing straight through you. “Don’t fuck with me, (Y/N). If this is a joke to you, I will walk away right now, and never bother you again.

But if it isn’t…you’re mine. There’ll be no one else, as long as I breathe. You’re stuck with me, because there’s no other way with me. I’m possessive, and I’m a fucking asshole, frankly, but you—” his gaze softened, the softest smile painting his lips, “you will understand, won’t you, sweetheart?”

You were in trouble. Naturally.

#stray kids scenarios #hyunjin scenarios #stray kids fanfiction #hwang hyunjin scenarios #stray kids #stray kids fanfic #hyunjin #stray kids smut #hyunjin smut #hyunjin imagines #skz scenarios #skz smut #hyunjin fanfiction #mine #fucking tumblr cut a couple paragraphs off #why does it do that bro

[loadsofcats]

So, one more thing that gets me (and possibly explains why I’ve latched so hard onto) about Bubble’s comics. I realised this is much longer than I intended it to be, but oh well, read under the cut if you’d like. These are just my thoughts, and of course, there are always exceptions, but here’s something I managed to gather from everything I’ve seen. Please ignore the fact that I constantly repeat myself, this was written more for me to express my feelings than to get a good grade in English.

So often, newly made media, be it books, movies, comics, etc. have this one trait and that is to introduce us to a (somewhat) broken world, great characters who are going to fix it, and then, when we start caring about them, kill them off. It has become so common to have an ending that tells you “You thought this was nice? Sike! This world sucks! Ha ha”. 

I don’t want that kind of ending, not without a reason. Sometimes things do end that way, and happy isn’t always what’s needed. But, when every ending is like that it becomes predictable. Boring. Sad. If I wanted a world where everything sucks, I would just watch the news. I like having a will to live after I’m done with something. When I am trying to convince myself there is kindness, I need something to hold on to.

It became so popular to kill off everyone - one, or two, or more is fine but when it gets to half, morethan half or all characters, it gets too much, and it’s not that nice if you don’t plan something else with them in the Underworld. When so many well developed characters die, you just feel… empty. Maybe that’s just me, but I start to care about them (although many times when my favourite characters were killed, I made an AU where they lived and I was like “yeah, the book/movie/whatever had it wrong, they added that for popularity. Besides, [Character] had to fake their death to finally get some peace smh”). Some characters have to live.

Yes, in the real world, everyone dies, and many, many, too many times it’s people who did nothing to deserve it, but we know, in most cases, that the books and movies don’t describe the real world. We willingly read them, knowing that is not this world. I don’t know about other people, but I read to escape. To feel more… not necessarily better.

Tragedies, on the other hand, give us heartbreaking endings. They give us catharsis, and teach us that we should be humble. Anything can happen to anyone in the blink of an eye. And tragedies make you think, question yourself and your views. Just like poetry does, they break you. You’re broken into pieces and you feel it so strongly, all that pain, and loss. But what it leaves you feeling something. You are left knowing something broke inside you, something that needed to be broken, for you to feel whole. So many things nowadays kill off characters but it doesn’t make you feel the catharsis. It just makes you feel empty, full of nothing except for morbid greyness and less will to live. You should care about your characters, goddamit! It might just be me, but I am desperately in need of stores where characters make it in the end and everything plays out well, despite it not being like the “real world”.

And what Bubble did… They did kill off characters, they did push them through so much pain and suffering, but in the end, they cared for them. Nowadays, everyone is acting towards their characters like Victor Frankenstein towards the Creature - they created them, and no longer care or hold responsibility. And I think that’s one of the things which made them stand out because it seemed they couldn’t leave it at that. They didn’t go “Okay, all lovable characters are dead, now cope with it however you can!” They brought back Oleg. Sergey is now (relatively) fine. They’re healing (not that Bubble won’t break us in the end with something else). In the end of Demonslayer, Danila found another world, with another Yana, another Pasha, but he found them. In a way, they were saved.

In Danila’s “starting” world, everything was destroyed. He lost everything and everyone he cared about. And so many of the things I’ve seen and read would leave it at that. But it wasn’t the end. It wasn’t really what you could call happy (and it wrecked you anyway), but it gave you something else in its place. It gave you a sense that not all was lost. There was still something good, worth living for.

There isn’t always a need for a happy ending. Sometimes it should be sad, sometimes bittersweet, but in the end, what matters is that it’s hopeful.

(Bubble probably killed off some other loveable characters I don’t know about, but we’ll leave it at this for now xD)

#rant #essay #bubble comics #it talks #thoughts

[thebigshotman]

(Before continuing on to the movie review this week of “Annie Hall”, I feel I need to state this. Yes, this is a Woody Allen film. Yes, he is, without a doubt, a scumbag of a human being. However, I throughly enjoyed the movie. This is because separating the art from the artist is a very real thing people can do, no matter how influenced by the artist’s life the art was. I and everyone else in my class did the same thing.

As my professor said before the screening: “This is a film class, not an ethics class; take your scorn elsewhere”. So please do not come to me with anon hate about the fact that I enjoyed this movie. It will be immediately deleted as if you never sent it. (I know most of the regulars around here know not to do that, and know what kind of person I really am, but you never know who might see this 😬)

Anyway! With that disclaimer out of the way, the review is under the cut for those interested! Thank you all for being respectful and chill 😊)

Another week, another movie in film class! Last week’s “Godfather” didn’t give me much to talk about, but good golly did this one! This week we watched “Annie Hall” by Woody Allen, and it was a romantic comedy. Romantic comedies are something I usually don’t watch very often, with the sole exception of “Pretty Woman” and a couple of others. But this one had a lot of tricks up its sleeve to keep me interested!

The movie is about the relationship between Alvy Singer-Allen-and the titular Annie Hall-Diane Keaton-as it rises, falls, rises again, and eventually breaks up amicably. Alvy’s other relationships are also explored briefly to hammer in the point that he seems to be unlucky in love no matter what. We see this relationship out of order, with their awkward first meeting only coming about a third a ways in. We also break the fourth wall pretty frequently, with fantasy sequences woven in here and there by all characters and frequent asides to the camera by Alvy. In the end, they meet each other one last time for dinner, and the whole thing ends surprisingly poignantly with a metaphor involving love and eggs. Trust me, it was way better than it sounded 😂

The screenplay definitely deserved to win an Oscar, as it’s very tightly written and very funny, if odd and cringe worthy occasionally. What didn’t win an Oscar but was amazing, though, was the cinematography, done by the same dude that did “Godfather” funnily enough. It really captured what it must be like to fall in and out of love against the backdrop of a big city. The fantasy sequences and asides, very unusual for a romcom, also make it stand out from a crowd and keep you guessing what strange-but-realism-driven thing would happen next. The movie line scene with a cameo by Marshall McLuan (you can look it up if you want) was a highlight!

I’d say it’s a combination of what “Scenes from a Marriage” and “Ferris Buller’s Day Off” must be like…but I’ve never seen either lol

Keaton deserved the Oscar for playing Annie, bringing just enough of her real self into the role to make her realistic but enhancing everything when needed to make her the prototype “manic pixie dream girl” she is. Some of my classmates thought Alvy was annoying, what with his constant griping and distinctive voice, and I can definitely see why, but…I saw parts of myself in both of them. My positive qualities in Annie’s free-spiritness and definitely my negative ones in Alvy’s anxieties and overthinking. So I can’t bring myself to hate either, or their performances. They truly captured the “nervous romance” of the tagline!

So, yeah! Overall I really liked this movie! It did a lot of things I didn’t expect a romantic comedy too, and in a good way, too. The burden of how horribly its writer/director/lead actor forked up over the years weights heavy on it, make no mistake, but I think despite that it’s aged decently. If you can find it for free somewhere I recommend watching it! Just, y’know, do what I did. As for me, I will be watching it again as soon as I can find that aforementioned free source lol

Next week is “Network”, the origin of the famous “mad as hell” rant! Definitely a very big change from a romcom, but as someone going to school for media and a news reporter myself I can’t wait to see how it is! I’ll be sure to let you all know. In the meantime, hopefully I’ll be on in a few hours to get to threads.

La dee da la dee da…seriously I loved Annie. See you all soon!

My mission if there’s ever a 70s day at college is to dress like her in this gif 😁

#(sorry for the giant disclaimer but I know I needed to put it) #(otherwise I would be aching for the punishment of someone reading this out of context) #(and think I’m praising a movie and I have no idea what its maker has done 🤷‍♀️) #(but!!! I did enjoy it! and have no shame that I did) #STRING PULLER-out of character

[swampcreature]

Tag Game To Better Know You

Thank you for the tag @lady--lisa!!

Tagging @owl-mug @teagrammy @william-jennings-bryan and anyone else who wants to do it.

What book are you currently reading?

I haven’t done a lot of reading for enjoyment recently nor have I really thought about picking up a book soon. Maybe once finals are over I'll get something.

What’s your favourite movie you saw in theatres this year?

I didn't see a whole lot of movies in the theaters this year, and the ones I did I didn't really like, but I liked the Baz Luhrmann Elvis movie the most out of them.

What do you usually wear?

I dress really casually. Right now, it's usually sweats, or a sweater or a cardigan and t-shirt, and jeans. I like fun multicolored socks and shoes. High school me used to dress like Vriska when we got no-uniform days though and I'm glad I graduated out of that.

How tall are you?

On the tall end of average height.

What’s your Star Sign? Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event?

Scorpio. I share a birthday with Bob Ross and the Great Depression.

Do you go by your name or a nick-name?

IRL I go by my full first name, but online I use a nickname.

Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child?

No. I think she'd like the path I chose though, even if she would be a little disappointed in the fact that I don't really do the thing she found passion in anymore. I'm still in university though, I have time to make it up to her.

Are you in a relationship? If not, who is your crush if you have one?

No, and honestly I kinda prefer being single.

What’s something you’re good at vs. something you’re bad at?

I have a fairly decent memory and am good at remembering deadlines and stupid trivia. Even things I thought I forgot (usually I just end up making some association and going oh yeah that's just like blah blah blah.)

I cannot wrap a present for the life of me. I can never manage to get the paper to fold right or the tape to look neat. Slap it in a bag, put some nice tissue paper in there, and call it a day.

Dogs or cats?

I like them both but I prefer dogs cuz that's what I grew up with.

If you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favourite picture/favourite line/favourite etc. from something you created this year?

Ughhhh I haven't finished anything in a while but i'm kinda proud of this line. I'm malding though cuz I have to scrap it cuz the scene flows better from the other character's pov.

"However, Andrew has always been inclined towards sin, so despite everything, it is natural that he gravitates towards a being as sinful as Antonio. Perhaps they’re cut from the same sinful cloth, both demons seeking a soothing hand, an honest tongue, and a kind heart. If his damnation comprises of an eternity playing games, drinking, and spending time with Antonio in this manor, then Andrew doesn’t think he minds at all.

"How cruel it is, that God allows him to meet someone who understands him so fully and uniquely, and still deny him the privilege of making him his soulmate."

What’s something you would like to create content for?

Identity V fandom doesn't have nearly enough femslash fic. The sapphics are starving.

What’s something you’re currently obsessed with?

Ride the Cyclone. Fantastic musical, fantastic characters, Jane Doe is my sweet daughter and deserves the world. Also recently taken an interest in Ada Lovelace, 19th-20th century classical music, and Ace Attorney.

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year?

This last semester of university. It's just been so incredibly draining. I'll be going abroad next semester though so should be some more excitement.

What’s a hidden talent of yours?

I can do pretty good accents (if I listen to someone with that accent for long enough.) When I was younger I used to be able to do a good Russian accent cuz I watched so much hetalia and now I can do a decent Clone High JFK voice.

Are you religious?    

No but I consider myself spiritual.

What’s something you wish to have at this moment?

A spa day. Especially a pedicure.

#marshpeaks #tag game

[tarnishedxknight]

Mantis shook her head reassuringly when Basch apologized. “No, it is okay.” That was a lie. “It is not your fault.” That was true. “After everything this world and many others have gone through, things no longer really end well for anyone, do they?” That was… what was that? She wasn’t sure if that was a lie or a truth, but she knew the universe had been changed, for the worse, forever. People would struggle to recover from this for many, many generations. No one would ever be overwhelmed with joy again, and if they were, it was an illusion; she had been overjoyed just now, and reality slapped her in the face so hard she saw stars. It served her right for clinging to the hope that life could be anything other than all the death and misery Thanos brought.

She listened when he said he knew the pain of grief and hope. The empath shook her head again. “You do not need to apologize, really. You did not hurt me, my own expectations did. It is not your fault… I am sorry you are familiar with that kind of pain, too.” As full of pain as she was, Mantis felt she had been lucky. She had been frozen in time for five years, missing all the destruction those who were left alive had to face. All the Guardians had been gone except for Rocket and Nebula. But then, they all came back… except for Gamora. They had a second chance at life and she didn’t. Mantis often cried herself to sleep thinking about it. Her friend deserved better.

With a small sigh, Mantis wrung her hands, looking down before her eyes widened when Basch asked what lands the legendary Star-Lord ruled. What? She tried to answer it the best she could. “Um… well, he is from the land of Missouri, but he does not live there. I am not sure if it counts as land, but we reside in Knowhere… and ships Benatar and Bowie. He owns a Zune, too, but we all use it. You know, to make life more bearable, listen to music, dance…” she explained, pretending to know what a Zune was, even though she knew nothing about it other than it was useful to play songs. “Do not worry! I should be able to find Kevin Bacon myself. Thank you.” Things were relatively easy when you could extract information from people’s heads. Her curiosity was sparked after he said he was not native to this land, however. “Where are you from? If you do not mind me asking.” She wasn’t overly familiar with Earth and its places, and to be fair, neither was Quill, since he was eight years old when he left. But she noticed Basch spoke and behaved in a way that was different from other Terrans, so she wasn’t too surprised upon learning the place was new for him. She also wondered if he had been turned to dust and if he felt as left behind as she did. As half of all life did.

(Omg yeah IW is hard to watch. The symbolism in Loki’s death is so well done though; he dies with blue skin because he can’t breathe and red eyes because they’re bleeding, and that’s his true form, blue skin and red eyes. I didn’t notice until his mun pointed it out to me and I was like OHH SHI- I love symbolism. But yeah, FrostBug works? Two green-wearing, dark-haired people with mind manipulation skills, raised away from their species by gods who didn’t really love them, and with himbo brothers. And despite all these parallels they can’t escape the ‘opposites attract’ dynamic XD And YEEES, it’s so cool when your interpretation is appreciated. You’ve told me once or twice that my Mantis is canon for you and it’s so gratifying <3 I would argue that any Mantis written by anyone anywhere is good. It’s Mantis.)

__________

{Yeah... Loki’s death was rough. I don’t dislike him, but he’s not a favorite of mine... and it still hit so hard, so I can only imagine actual fans of him, oh man. And I didn’t think about the symbolism but now I’ll never be able to unsee it, heh. I also never considered FrostBug before you mentioned it, but I’m so here for it. Add it to my list of never-happened ships that I love, haha. And yes, I stan your Mantis, always. <3 But I agree, the world needs more Mantis in general. I haven’t seen most things she’s in, but the moment she said, “Kick names, take ass” in IW, I FELL IN LOVE WITH HER COMPLETELY. XD I actually gigglesnorted and I loved it. }

“Whether or not 'tis my fault, I am nevertheless... truly sorry,” Basch said sincerely. As Mantis told him that things rarely ended well for anyone nowadays, his eyes fell. “Aye... they seldom do...” he lamented. “I was... not awake when the warlord Thanos brought about his devastating cull upon this world. When I awoke, the people of this time were already struggling to cope with the long-term effects of it, and in truth, of what was done to reverse it as well. The reversal was not perfect, as I understand...” His words were very gentle, respectful, for he wondered if she had lost someone very important to her who had not been returned. It was just a sense he got from her.

He understood, of course, that feeling of disappointment, of one’s stomach dropping so fast they felt ill, to hear that what was lost could never be regained. Basch had lost everyone and everything dear to him, his entire world, his way of life, his identity, his purpose... so he understood how deep the scars that loss carved into a person’s soul could be. “Hope is still worth having,” he said for it was something he believed in fully. Hope and love were Basch’s religion, and no amount of times they had both slapped him in the face would ever shake his faith in them. They were worth believing in. They were. “Even as painful as it is, hope is what keeps the soul alive in times of strife. The pain we feel when hopes are dashed... is only love, denied. And love is never wrong,” he offered, attempting to comfort her. “I take comfort in that, whenever hope causes me pain... for I would not feel such pain if I had not first loved.”

“Alas, I am unfamiliar with the lands of Missouri and Knowhere,” Basch replied, “and I do not know what a Zune is either. Forgive me, I am very much unfamiliar with contemporary cultures and geographic locations. But I do wish you luck in your search for Lord Bacon, and I am sorry I could not be of greater help to you.” He thought she was about to leave, and so he was prepared to wish her well and continue on with his day, when she asked him where he was from. Basch was not certain how to answer that. He knew any answer he might give would only stir up more questions in his mind, but since he had no qualms about answering them...

“I was born in the Republic of Landis, but I lived the majority of my life in the Kingdom of Dalmasca,” he replied. “Both... perished some five thousand years ago.” Or so he’d been told. He’d lived through the destruction of Landis, but the fate of Dalmasca... that he’d found out from his brother, who was an immortal revenant and had lived through all the years that Basch had been in magical slumber. “Magic... caused me to be frozen in time, until recently. I now serve as an Avenger.” He was not certain if any of that would make sense to her since they seemed to be from very different walks of life as far as places and people they knew, but he was truthful nonetheless. He had no reason to lie. “All I have known, many I loved... all lost to antiquity. Gone.” That last word was whispered, emotional. “I may not have experienced the devastation that Thanos brought about, but I understand staggering loss. I live with it each day. So when I say that I am sorry, it is with great understanding and deep commiseration that I say it.”

#main muse: basch #{LORD BACON... I AM DEAD} #{R.I.P. ME 2023}

[gojogloomy]

SERENDIPITY - ch.2

— SYNOPSIS ; Hayakawa Aki had found himself in quite the predicament. His mission was a bust and so was his car; what was he going to do now?

CW ; more descriptions of blood, angst.

WC ; 1.6k

“The Building”

Indifference, tolerance

You had just been captured and kicked out of your home by a devil hunter, yet all your thoughts could do is think of your bunny, Usagi.

Is she hurt? Is she hungry? Where did she run? Is she safe? Has—

"Hey, Devil."

Two pale fingers were snapped in front of your face, startling you a little.

"I'm talking to you. Is being unresponsive another one of your powers?" he questioned, most likely rhetorical, tugging your cuff-bound wrists along with him whilst he tucked the other hand he used to snap in your face back into his pockets.

"No, but is being rude and obnoxious one of yours?" you retorted. You had been patient and compliant with him this past half an hour yet he still continues to be mean and talk down to you. Were all devil hunters this insufferable?

"Not really, just a matter of habit." he taunted. His face remained as monotoned as ever yet you could just hear the pettiness laced within the remark.

"Yeah?" you stopped walking - causing the devil hunter to also stop in his tracks via your bound link of cuff to hand. You gave him a glare before speaking, "Well I think it's a bad habit. Is this how you treat all the new people you meet?"

He chuckled dryly, one filled with slight disgust before he whispered, "It's a little funny that you refer to yourself as a person. Do you even realise you're not even human anymore?"

Even if you were no longer human,

Even if you weren't the same as him anymore,

did he have to be so cruel to you?

You simply shook your head, refusing to converse with him further. He was indefinitely insufferable. His coal-black hair must be a metaphorical reflection of his very heart - dark and empty.

Everything about him is a walking oxymoron. His posture is sharp and elegant, he acts and speaks with such profession - as though he was a prince. It's easy to tell he keeps his suit and appearance neat and tidy; yet he treats you with no remorse nor respect as though you're the very ground he walks on.

It couldn't be that simple though. This antagonism has to be coming from somewhere, right?

Trying to keep an open mind is the only reason you don't despise him just yet. You figured there was a reason as to why the black-haired devil hunter acts within such a way towards you.

Perhaps he has a bad history with devils, right? That could be the only reasonable explanation. Perhaps a devil had done something horrible to him in the past.

That was the only solution you could think of as to why he would act such a way to you as if you deserve it. However, you were confused. You've never done anything to anyone and you've been living a remotely peaceful life up until now, so you couldn't understand just why he was detaining you and treating you so poorly.

Were you going to die?

The possibility of that seemed very low but... maybe the day had finally come?

You averted your gaze upwards to take a glance at the young black-haired man who has been forcing you to walk for the past, what, 40 minutes now?

This journey seemed impossible. No matter how far you walked, all you could see was never-ending snow-covered roads on end.

The clouds were gloomy and the whole atmosphere felt dull. Usually, snow is seen as a beautiful thing but right now; all that could fill your heart was sorrow.

The two of you walked the middle of the road, slightly adjusted to the right so in case of any cars they could easily transition to the snow-covered sidewalk.

Just then, he stopped walking - giving your pitiful aching feet a break. The snow softened each step of the way but despite its kind efforts, your feet felt like they had a million different pins and needles pressed deep into them.

The man pulled out a taboo-looking device from his pocket; perhaps something that comes from the city.

You had never ventured into the city so you lacked the knowledge of quite a lot of things that existed within it.

You stared at the man, at the device, then back at the man as he raised it to his ears, attempting to speak through it? Though, when he realised whatever he was doing wasn't working - the young man shoved it back into his pocket with a sigh before turning to face you once more.

"Is there a reason why you're looking at me so intently?" he asked, burning holes into the back of your retinas. You could stare at him all you wanted but you had to admit you were no match for his intimidating gaze.

"Yeah... are you getting cold? You're shivering." despite his rudeness you were genuinely concerned for him, considering how susceptible humans were to weather changes. You'd know, considering you used to be one.

His cheeks were flushed red from the cold and his once neat hair was now littered with chunks of snow everywhere, along with his suit.

"I'm fine," he insisted, shoving his other hand deeper into the soft comforts of his pockets. "You don't need to concern yourself about me."

"How much longer is this walk? My feet are aching,"

"Still a long ways away." The young man replied hastily.

"What's your name? You never told me." you doubted he would tell you, but it was worth a shot in the dark, right? You suspected he'd say something witty such as 'Yeah I never told you for a reason.' or something along the lines of that - but instead the black-haired man said

"If I told you, would you finally allow me to walk in peace, Devil?" he sighed, dusting a few small bits of white snowflakes from his eyelashes with his free hand.

You laughed a little, a bit surprised at the suggestion. Though nonetheless you agreed. After all, calling him the young man was getting a little old. Pun intended. Plus, calling him a young man was beginning to make you feel old yourself.

"Then..." He slowed down his inhumane pace to a much slower pace so that you weren't straddling behind him like a puppy, but now walking together side by side. "My name is Hayakawa Aki. Are you satisfied now?"

"Yes, I am. Thanks Hayakawa. My name is—"

"There's no need for that." he cut in, not allowing you to finish your sentence. "I think i'll just stick to calling you Devil."

"That's not fair," you argued but he just chuckled a little and continued walking. However, something wasn't right.

He wasn't walking at his usual pace - if anything, he seemed quite... strained?

It was only now that you finally noticed the dulled greenish veins bulging from his neck and forehead along with his heavy laboured breathing, as though he was struggling.

His once elegant posture was now almost hunched and he was treading through the snow with shaky legs, as though his hamstrings could collapse at any second.

"Hayakawa... are you okay?" you stopped, forcing him to stop too. He turned around, somehow still mustering up enough energy to pull a slightly irritated expression.

"I told you already... I'm f-f—"

As though his own body wished to prove him wrong, he collapsed mid-sentence; making you fall with him with his strong grip on the handcuff.

You fell beside Aki and now the two of you were covered in snow. Fortunately, the fall itself didn't hurt at all considering the pillow-like texture of the snow. Though even so, Hayakawa didn't look okay at all. He was beginning to turn pale.

"Sorry. Forgot to... let go," he breathed, his words shakier than ever. Only now, after so long, he finally released the metal cuffs from his grasp so you could stand again. You helped push his weight onto a tree so that he could sit upright and crouched on your knees to his level.

"You're not okay. What's wrong? Are you cold? Hungry?" you asked too many questioned at once, genuinely concerned and slightly freaked out.

Seeing the man who had been so formidable, baleful and bitter suddenly become so vulnerable right before your eyes felt almost surreal - in a bad way.

Though despite the drastic situation, he seemed to crack a smile nonetheless.

"You... don't remember, do you?"

"What do you mea—...?"

The question answered itself it appeared. The snow-struck wind felt like it was blowing heavier and colder than ever now.

How couldn't you have noticed? Thick globs of blood had already stained his pants by now. His undershirt was a complete wreck of scarlet everywhere, even his outer suit jacket was stained with it.

The sight was ghastly - When did this happened?

"Was after I... After I tried to kill you—" it was as though Hayakawa had read your mind. Though, his sentence was interrupted by deep guttural coughing.

You understood what happened now. It must've been Deflection; the untameable shield that forced itself upon you ever since the day you lost your humanity.

"Why would you walk for so long in this condition? You've lost so much blood Hayakawa—"

"I-I thought," the persistent coughing interrupted him once again. Taking a deep and painful breath, he tried again. "I thought it... wouldn't be long until I'd be able to... call for help."

At this point, all you could see within your vicinity was Aki's dark maroon blood, stained dry all over the white canvas of snow.

A/N ; no comment. ☃️

Oh, and here’s part 3

[marioyuri]

Ocelot is so soft to Eli starts screaming and crying

#Ocelot loves torturing people during interrogations sm and i get Eli is just a kid so he wouldnt hurt him but he was like #holding him and being nice and shit #ITS CUTE #hes like youve been a bad kid . encouraging your boys to kill people and letting them escape and several counts of attempted patricide . #youre grounded for all of that. and by grounded i mean youre still allowed to do whatever you want but ill take away ur weapons #and put guards by your quarters to keep an eye on you #and then eli starts fake crying and hes like hmrmm.. but dont worry youll still see your boys :) and even your father you keep trying to kil #its okay :) just tell me why and hes holding him with a soft voice like BRO HES STEALING THE NUCLEAR WAR MECHA AS WE SPEAK #LIKE OCELOT……… I LOVE YOU BUT YOU DIDNT EVEN TRY TO COVER YOURSELF WHEN THE DOOR BLEW UP ARE YOU THAT TRUSTING #LIKE LISTEN i genuinely do think Eli deserves compassion and kindness at all times despite all the horrible things he does bc hes just a kid #his life is horrible from the moment he was born he was created with the intent of being lesser and was treated as such since #the world was too cruel to him for simply being born without asking for it. he didnt ask to be born and even less as a genetic experiment #SO YEAH I THINK HE DESERVES THE KINDNESS DESPITE EVERYTHING HES DOING AND DONE. however Ocelot was stupid for falling for that. #but its okay bc he wasnt hurt and he wasnt mad at Eli. he never is. and he did end up finding him and adopting him for the next 10 years #until he became Liquid Snake and did the shit he did in MGS #AND THEN OCEOT DID BRAINWASH HIMSELF INTO IMPLANTING LIQUIDS PERSONALITY IN HIS MIND and ik it was bc of the plan but like damn #aughhh i know i used to joke abt how ovelot was liquids detested step father but i. i mean he literally was his adoptive dad

[cafedanslanuit]

♡   —   pairing: kazutora x reader

♡   —   summary: after a long day at work, you want nothing but to spend a calm night with your boyfriend. however, you have no idea this is the night were all his demons finally get the best of him.

♡   —   tags/warnings: female reader, angst, breakups, hurt feelings everywhere, mention on mental illnesses and nightmares, based on ben platt’s song ‘carefully’, mention of tora’s job in one of the future timelines.

♡   —   a/n: i enjoyed writing kazutora so. damn. much. also, i’m quite proud of this one and the small details i added~ thank you @ofoceansandtombstones​​ for being my lovely beta <3

♡   —  masterlist

And all this time you've had a gentle way of holding me

So could you please release me that way too?

— “carefully” by Ben Platt

“It’s open, come in!”

The first thing Kazutora sees when he opens the door of your apartment is you, kneeling on the kitchen floor and picking up pieces of a broken baking dish. Red sauce has splattered everywhere and his mind betrays him for a second, imagining an accident far worse than what has truly happened. He blinks twice and starts to notice the small details that finally slow down the fast beating of his heart. There are pieces of chicken breasts next to the open oven door and what he thinks are sliced carrots next to your right knee.

You hiss when you pick up a piece of the shattered glass, the sharp end pinching your finger. Kazutora comes back to his senses, widening his eyes as he realizes he’s just been standing there.

“Hey, let me. You’ll cut yourself,” he warns, walking up to you. Grabbing both your hands, he eases you into your feet and then guides you to the living room. “I’ll take care of it,” he promises as he goes back to the kitchen and starts cleaning up the mess.

You let yourself fall on the sofa with a loud thud and let out an exasperated sigh.

“I just had the most awful day,” you whine, taking off your apron and leaving it on the arm of the sofa.  “Work was hell, I got scolded by something that I didn’t do— like always, only this time my boss was all like: ‘You gotta be more careful, we wouldn’t want to lose such a valuable employee’. Like he was going to fire me over someone else’s mistake?!”

Your voice is getting louder by the minute and you take advantage of the fact Kazutora is in another room to keep the volume. You have been waiting the entire day to see him and vent about what a trainwreck you day had been. Just as always, he listens intently, the only noise coming from the kitchen being a soft scraping sound as he picks up everything and throws it to the trash. 

“Then, I went to the store and of course they had run out of basil. Tell me, how does a store that big run out of basil?” you ask. There’s no answer from the kitchen so you continue. “I mean, yeah, I could have gone to another store but my feet were killing me. I’m just not meant to work in heels the entire day,” you sigh tiredly, swinging your feet.

You reposition yourself, now sitting cross-legged on the sofa. Putting your right hand on your left shoulder, you stretch your neck, feeling your sore muscles releasing a bit of tension with a small ‘pop’.

“I ended up preparing something entirely different than I had planned for dinner. I tried to let it go but just as I was going to put it in the oven, it slipped my hands and—”

“I think we should break up.”

Words die in your lips the moment you listen to your boyfriend speak. The silence becomes loud and abrasive as you struggle to understand what was happening. Why was Kazutora breaking up with you with such a small voice? What had triggered him to come to that conclusion? Why had he decided to bring it up now? You turn your head to the kitchen door and watch him slowly make his way towards you, doubtful steps as he takes a seat on the other side of the sofa, avoiding your eyes at all costs.

“What?” you ask, your voice hoarse. His lips form a tight line and you see him swallowing nervously.

“I’m not doing okay— haven’t been for a while. I— it’s been two years since I left prison and I still haven’t— I don’t— I don’t know what I’m doing,” he explains, looking down at his hands.

You nod slowly, trying to comprehend where he’s coming from. Turning your body towards him, you take a deep breath before speaking.

“It’s okay not to know,” you assure him in a soft voice. “Just… take it slow. One day at a time and then I’m sure you’ll—”

“I haven’t been sleeping well,” Kazutora confesses and you notice his voice wavering a little. “I— I keep having nightmares about— about that day and— and also about the motorcycle shop. Those two mix up and…” he takes one of his hands to the side of his head, his fingers grazing his temple. “And I’m hitting Baji in the head. And there’s so much blood— so, so much blood and—”

Leaning forward, you take his hands. They’re shaking and extremely cold and you rub your thumb over his knuckles, trying your best to soothe him.

“Hey, it’s okay. You’re safe now, Tora, you’re—”

Kazutora pulls his hands away hastily, leaving a tingling sensation on your palms.

“I can’t!” he says as he shakes his head. You spend a moment looking at your empty hands, never before having felt your boyfriend’s rejection. “I feel like I’m drowning and— You know what? I think relationships just aren’t for me,” he shrugs, his hands moving in exaggerated gestures. “That’s why I never cared for dating, never got myself involved in that kind of shit, not until—”

He finally looks at you and, fuck, you wish he didn’t. You’re not sure if you have the strength to deal with such hurtful discourse. You lick your lips and take yet another deep breath, deciding to ignore his hurtful remark.

“I’m… so sorry you’re feeling this way,” you say, slowing down your words, trying your best not to show how hurt you were. This isn’t him, you tell yourself. So no need for that tightness in your throat. “But you have to understand it’s not because of me. It’s because of everything that you’ve gone through and how hard it’s to deal with them. I don’t blame you, it is hard. But this… us,” you gesture to the both of you. “This is a good thing. Despite all the pain and hurt we’ve both been through, we—”

“Please, stop,” he says, raising his hand and pressing his eyelids together. “I can’t be with you anymore. That’s it, that’s all—”

“So you don’t love me anymore?” you counter. You scoff in disbelief, shaking your head. Kazutora’s eyes shoot open and you notice his pupils shaking in fear, like a deer caught in headlights.

“I love you,” he breathes out, and for a moment you see the boy you fell in love with in his amber eyes that are quickly filling with tears. “I do love you but it’s killing me. I feel like I’m dying,” he chokes out. He looks away from you once more and starts tugging at his fingers. “I’m rotting inside and I don’t know what to do to make it better. I just want it to stop. I want it to stop and— I don’t want you around when I’m like this. I want to figure out what the hell is happening and—”

“But if you love me and I love you then why—”

“I’m not happy with you!”

Kazutora widens his eyes, scared by his loud outburst. He parts his lips, silently muttering nonsense as he tries to come up with words that can make it better. You lower your head and he wants to punch himself over it. He doesn’t want to make you cry, not after everything you’ve done for him. Is he really going to be the person that hurt the one that made a home for him in her embrace? Is he going to hurt the only person that was brave enough to pick up the pieces of his shattered soul?

“I’m…” he babbles, in a soft voice. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it.”

You snort. “No, you really did mean it, Tora.”

He can sense the hurt and sadness in your voice, even if now you’re the one that won’t look at him. He watches helplessly as you stand up and walk towards the living room window in complete silence. The apron you took off is still on the couch and the vast memories of all the times he embraced you while you were wearing it quickly fill his mind.

He wishes there was a way he could keep you. But no matter how much he wants to, he knows there really is no other way. He’s thought about this countless times. He has gone to work without getting proper sleep, stared at his blank tv screen for hours on end, trying to come up with a plan where he could keep you. Was staying with the person he loved the most too much to ask?

No matter in how many shades of light or with how much care he handled the memory of you, the only way he could spare you the greatest amount of pain was to leave you— even if he knew he’d end up shattering your heart as well.

Kazutora notices the way your fingers tightly close around the edge of the window, your knuckles turning white. He had come to terms that he’d lose you today, yet he never expected for it to be this way. It doesn’t matter, he tells himself. If hating him would mend your wounds faster, then he’d take it. Anything that would make the heartache he was causing you a little bit lighter. He knew you were the last person on Earth that deserved to go to bed carrying that much pain in her soul.

Looking out the window, you focus on a small girl walking her dog on the street. It’s a brown labrador and by the size of it, it’s barely a puppy. Rather than walk, it jumps on its four legs, his little head looking back at the girl every chance he has as he happily wags his tail. The pet shop Kazutora and Chifuyu work at immediately comes to mind. Would it be like this from now on? Small things eliciting memories of your days together without your consent and leaving a sour taste in your mouth?

You will need to find a new commute, you think, as you had been stopping by the pet shop on your way home for the past year. Is there another bus that you could take? As you try to remember the lines and their respective routes, you’re engulfed by the memory of the first time Kazutora dozed off with his head resting on your shoulder as you rode the bus together. You close your eyes and you can clearly see his peaceful expression and slightly parted lips as he slept, his fingers tightly intertwined with yours. His breathing is slow and his hands are cold and you wish you could go back, even for a minute and place a kiss on top of his head, since you wouldn’t be able to do so from now on.

Where exactly had you failed? You had just been complaining about your day when he dropped the bomb. Did you complain too much? Did you talk too much? Or was it you the one that was too much? You tried your best and supported him as much as you could but as it turns out, it hadn’t been enough. Good intentions were nothing but useless as you were now saying goodbye to the man you had loved the most.

You didn’t realize you were crying until you felt Kazutora’s cold knuckles against your cheek, wiping your tears. You gasp, startled by his touch and take a couple steps back until your back hits the wall. It takes a few seconds for him to bring his hand now, unsure on what to do next.

He looks so scared and small— it fills your heart with frustration. Your whole body is screaming to take a step forward and comfort him, cradle him in your arms like so many times before, assure him he’s safe with you and that he doesn’t have to worry anymore. That, if you can still go home to each other at the end of a bad day, you can take anything life throws at you.

But that’s the thing. You’re not each other’s home anymore. You don’t get to bury your face in his neck and hum happily when his perfume reaches your nose. You don’t get to have him take a nap on your lap as you watch a series or feel his lips ghost against yours seconds before colliding in a kiss.

You hate it. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, crossing his arms in front of his chest and looking down at his feet. “Please, don’t cry.”

“You know what, Kazutora?” you say, wiping your tears with the back of your hand. You taste venom in your words, yet that doesn’t stop you. “If you’re not happy with me, then what are you doing here?”

He flinches at your words. Biting his inner cheek, he nods, still incapable of holding your gaze.

“Yeah, okay,” he mutters. “I’ll go. I really am sorry.”

Kazutora turns on his heel, walking towards the door. Maybe it’s the way you know he’s not coming back this time that makes your desperation afloat. You don’t want him to go and you also know you can’t make him stay. And even if somehow you could find a way to keep him by your side, it would be worthless.

He’s just not happy with you.

“Are you happy somewhere else, though?” you ask, your words leaving your mouth before your head has time to process them. He stumbles on his feet and stops. “Because if you just can’t manage to be happy, then it’s not on me.”

Kazutora doesn’t have to turn for you to know he’s second guessing himself. The next seconds feel like years as he just stands there, mid-way to the front door, thoughts so messy and loud you can almost hear them.

“That doesn’t matter,” he finally says with his back to you. He closes his fists and you see his shoulders rising and falling as he takes a deep breath. “This way you don’t have to deal with... with the mess I am and—”

“Oh, please, I knew what I was getting into when I started dating an ex-convict.”

The weight of your words fall onto you the moment they leave your mouth. You squeeze your eyes shut, muttering a curse. It takes no time for you to walk towards Kazutora, standing between him and the door.

“Shit, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Tora, I didn’t— you know I didn’t mean it that way. Fuck, I’m so sorry,” you whimper, tears flowing free down your cheeks. Your wave your shaky hands, desperate to make your point across. “I just wanted to say I knew things would be difficult but I loved you— I love you and I—”

Kazutora shakes his head, a gentle yet sad smile on his face as he takes your hands in his. He holds them in front of his chest, squeezing them gently as they don’t stop trembling.

“Stop, it’s okay,” he assures you. “That’s what I am.”

“It’s not,” you protest. “I mean— yeah, but you’re more than that. You’re so much more than that. You’re caring, you’re noble— you’re so tender with the animals at your shop. You’re so sweet with me, always checking if I’ve eaten and offering to help me out if I have chores I need to do. You always come pick me up if I’m working late. You— you’re so fucking special to me.”

Kazutora’s lips form a tight line. “I wish I could see that,” he whispers.

“Then just— let me try. Let me try until you can look at yourself the way I do,” you almost beg. You let go of the hold he has on your hands to gently cradle his face. “I’ll do anything, but... don’t patronize me. I’m not a little girl. Whatever life throws at me, I’ve always been able to handle it. No— we’ll handle it. Together. Like it’s always been, you and me, I just— please, I don’t want you to go,” you cry. “We were going to be happy together, you were going to live with me and I’d give you half my drawers and half my closet and half… half everything. Please, don’t go. Don’t go, Tora.”

The sadness in his amber eyes only confirms what you’ve been fearing this whole time. You sob, your thumbs softly stroking his cheeks as you feel the world crumbling around you. This time, he doesn’t stop you, letting you cry as you hold his face, coming to terms with the fact he’s really leaving after all.

Your hands move to his hair, gently threading your fingers across his long, dark locks. Tracing the outline of his face, you push one of the dyed streaks away, only for it to fall back right where it was before. You can’t help the small smile that forms on your lips. He’s so pretty, you think, as the pads of your fingers gently caress his face. Your thumb grazes the space between his bottom lip and his chin and you dream of a world when he’s not saying goodbye, but rather falling asleep under your touch on your shared bed. You never knew loving someone as much as you loved him was possible-- yet the way your heart was crumbling in pieces was evidence of how much your soul was aching by being separated from the person it belonged to.

Sniffling, you rub your cheek against your shoulder to wipe your tears. You swallow before raising another question.

“Is this a… temporary thing? Or for good?” Your voice comes out in a whisper as you place down your hands on his shoulders.

“I don’t know,” he answers. He wants nothing more than to put his arms around your body like so many times before, but he’s aware that it will only make things more difficult. “But I don’t want to keep you waiting in vain. You should move on.”

Kazutora realizes how much he hates the idea as it leaves his lips. The idea of you starting over with someone else rots in his tongue. He doesn’t want you to hold anyone’s face the way you were just holding his. He wants to keep you all to himself, to go to endless visits to the grocery shop, to watch you fall asleep during movie night and then pretend you didn’t, to massage your hands as you tell him about his day.

But you don’t deserve the guck that’s forming inside his mind. He knows it’s only a matter of time before it comes out pouring and reaches you. And he’ll be damned if he lets himself ruin the one good thing he’s had in his life for many years. He promised to himself he wouldn’t let his ill state of mind touch his loved ones. Never again.

He watches you nod and feels his heart shattering, even if everything is going just the way he intended. You rub his shoulders and look into his eyes, a sad smile on the pretty lips he would never get to kiss again.

“Okay,” you sigh. “We’ll end this but… when you leave, never doubt how loved you were. No— how loved you are. I don’t know what is coming for either of us but… I do know a part of my heart will always belong to you, no matter who I hold hands with. I will always love you, Tora.”

Your words are enough to finally break him. Kazutora clutches your body tightly against him as he loudly sobs against your shoulder. You hold him, tears flowing free once again as you try and soothe the man you love, leaving small kisses on the side of his head and whispering soft reassurances that it’s okay. It’s not, you tell yourself. It’s never going to be okay. But it has to be.

Carefully, you move him back to the sofa, helping him sit down while he refuses to let go of his hold on your body. You lean on the back pillows, both your arms cradling him while he whimpers like a small child. Kazutora clutches the fabric of your sweater with desperation, wishing there was a way he could stay with you.

Why does he have to give up the person that had put a smile back on his face? He can’t quite remember a time when his stomach had hurt out of laughter before he ever met you. Or when he’d experienced such peace as the night he stayed at your apartment and got to see your sleeping face first thing in the morning. He’s never loved anyone as much as he loves you and, for all he knows, he may never love like this again. 

But he could never risk tainting you. He would never be able to forgive himself.

Kazutora softly pulls away from your embrace. His eyes are blotchy and red and you’re sure yours look the same or even worse. His nose is red, like it always does when he cries. It’s endearing, you think. Everything about him, from his hair, to his eyes, his hands— you’ve come to love every part of Kazutora. And that’s exactly why it’s so hard to let him go.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he says in a whisper, resting the side of his head on the back pillows of the sofa.

“Like what?” you ask, gently pushing his hair away from his face and behind his ear.

“Like I matter to you. Like I’m making a huge mistake.”

You take a deep breath. Imitating him, you rest your head on the back pillows as well, so you’re both facing each other.

“I don’t— I don’t fully understand what you’re going through,” you admit, your eyes locked on his. “But if you need to… get away, then you should. You’ve been nothing but loving to me. All I’ve ever wanted was for you to be happy, whether it’s with me or not. You deserve to fully experience all the beautiful things life has to offer.”

Silent tears fall from both your cheeks and his.

“I should be thankful I got to love you for this whole year. Because even if it ends this way… God, I loved you so much,” you sniffle, letting out a small laugh. “And I felt so loved. Isn’t that magical in itself? That we got to love each other at the same time?” you wonder with a sad smile.

Kazutora parts his lips, yet the doorbell interrupts him before he can even speak. You look at the front door, your eyebrows furrowing for a moment before you realize who’s probably there.

“Food’s here,” you say, wiping the tears from your face.

“Food?” Kazutora asks, confused.

“Yeah,” you sigh. “Didn’t I tell you? The baking dish broke so I called that restaurant, the one with the burgers we like.”

“Sorry. I wasn’t really listening back then,” he admits with a pang of guilt. He sits up on the couch and turns his head at you. “I’ll leave you to it, then.”

You sit up as well. “I ordered for the two of us. C’mon, stay for dinner. Let’s… remember us this way, okay? Without so many tears and sadness,” you offer, tilting your head towards him. “I even ordered your favourite one.”

Kazutora rubs his face with his sleeve, erasing the trail of the tears he just shed. Looking at you, he nods, drawing a small smile on his lips.

“Okay. I’ll get it.”

He only walks a few steps towards the door before he feels you tugging at the back of his shirt. Turning around, he notices you’re standing right behind him. Your eyes look up to him, biting your bottom lip and not even a ghost of the smile you previously offered him.

“Before that, uh— I want you to know I… I mean it,” you firmly say, taking in all his facial features, loving how they soften every time he looks at you. “I’ll always love you. No matter how many years go by or if I ever stop being in love with you— I’ll still love you.”

“I’ll always love you too,” he replies, taking your hand and squeezing it softly. “I don’t think I could stop even if I wanted to.”

You finally let out a soft chuckle and squeeze his hand back. The doorbell rings again and you walk around Kazutora to get to it. This time, he’s the one that stops you, not letting go of the hold of your hand. Looking back at him, you notice the soft pout in his lips and how they softly tremble, looming more tears.

“It’s okay,” you assure him, and you know you’re saying it to yourself as well. “Who knows, we might get together again someday. Have our own Casablanca moment. We’ll always have the pet shop,” you joke, trying to fight back to tears that threaten to fill your eyes as well.

It’s Kazutora’s turn to chuckle, only this time he does it along with you. You let go of his hand only to hold his face tenderly, a soft smile as you look at the man you love. Standing on your tiptoes, you press your lips against the beauty mark under his right eye. You feel his hands setting on the small of your back and watch his smile widen when you fall back on your heels.

Locking your fingers with him once more, you open the door.

#tokyo revengers x reader #tokrev x reader #tr x reader #kazutora x reader #hanemiya kazutora x reader #kazutora hanemiya x reader #kazutora hanemiya #hanemiya kazutora #tokyo revengers #kazutora angst #tokyo revengers angst #kazutora x you #kazutora x y/n #hanemiya kazutora x you #hanemiya kazutora x y/n

[awkwardspontaneity]

Hello. This is my first request for the Legend of Zelda, so I do not know how to write it correctly. I don't speak English and I'm writing this in a translator, so there may be mistakes here, sorry. In general, I want to see how the reader will react to the fact that Revali, Link and Sidon cheated on her. (something made me feel sad) Thank you in advance ╹▽╹

I'm so sorry something happened to upset you. If it's along the lines of this request give me a name😤👊 anyways thank you so much for requesting!! This ended up being so much longer than I intended but I'm pretty happy with it. I hope this is what you're looking for!

✨ requests are open✨

Warning: angst, cheating

Revali🐦

I think with his prickly nature not a lot of people would stick around long enough to get to know how much he cares

But some bitch saw how much he was training to perfect his powers to help Hyrule and couldn't resist

It started off as bringing him lunches and heat pads after a long day of training and then it escalated

They would wrap his wings up and suddenly he was letting them fix his braids. He never saw it as much more than a fan helping him out but you saw differently

It ended up in a big fight when you finally brought up how Revali was allowing this fan to hang off of him like they were his partner not you. You brought up excellent points like how he took such a long time to even trust you with braiding his hair and that he could at least let them know he's in a relationship.

Revali got upset (probably cuz ur right and he can't admit it) and snapped that at least they appreciated him

Yeah bad move. You walked out and bird brain left to train away the pain

You came across his first and decided to head to the shooting range with some peace snacks but what do you find?

You walk up the slope towards the archery range, a container of Revali's favourite snacks in hand. As you approach you see something sitting inside the hut and assume it's him. Sterling your breath you walk into the hut and what you find takes your breath away- not in the good way either. Revali sat there with his wings wrapped around them, too caught up on their liplock to notice you standing there.

CRASH

The container hits the ground with a shatter, ruining their little scene.

"Y/n-"

"Don't even try it." You wish your voice didn't sound as broken. No matter how much your heart squeezed in pain from the betrayal, you wanted to come off so much different- angrier. Because you were angry. "Just because we have an argument does not give you the right to run off with your new friend."

Revali flinches at the word and you feel a sick glimmer of satisfaction. He opens his mouth to protest, ignoring your glare. "I-I'm sorry." Your glare darkens and he immediately flounders for the right words. "You accused me of something I didn't do-"

Yeah, not the right words. You wish you could do something, anything to hurt him like he hurt you. But you had to be the bigger person no matter how much you wanted to snap that precious bow of his in half.

"I accused you, not have you permission."

"We can work through this, together" his wing reached out to you, but you recoiled to fast.

"We're not together." You walked towards the entrance "I hope it was worth it."

Link 🗡️

Link is a closed off person. Sure he has people worship him for his title as the hero of Hyrule, but he would never let that get to his head. You could tell this boy he's amazing and it still wouldn't get through his insecurities

Maybe it's cruel but, that almost reassured you he would never break your heart like that. You felt secure in your relationship

That's why it was so shocking when you found out he had fallen for Zelda.

It wasn't meant to ever be more than knight and princess. And you never should have found out.

You were walking towards the stables of your party was staying at. It was supposed to be a simple trip to complete some research out in the plains. Of course your trip was ambushed by an energetic princess who begged to come along for research purposes. You couldn't complain because the addition of the princess also came with your boyfriend Link.

Now you were looking for him outside the small ranch. You fully expected him to be caring for Epona like he always did after a long trip. His love for his horse was something you had always loved about him. The way he would stay later than everyone else to make sure she was okay. It had made stables kind of your spot. Hanging out at the end of a long day to talk and spend time together while caring for your steeds.

Maybe that was why your heart felt so utterly shattered when you did find him, standing next to the stable, with the princess in his arms. Maybe you could have fooled yourself into believing he was being friendly if he hadn't pressed a long loving kiss to her forehead followed by both her cheeks, chuckling softly as she giggled.

You knew they had always been close. I mean they spent all their time together. You'd just never thought that Link would do something like this to you.

You walked away from the stables fighting backs the tears in your eyes. It was only when you found you had walked into an older area, a spare shack outside, that you finally let the tears fall. Your heart twisted in pain as sobs tore from your throat.

Why hasn't you seen this? Why weren't you enough?

------

Your research trip was almost over. You had gone back late into the night to find Link on the edge of his bed head in his hands. He had shot up to demand where you had been when you finally walked in and although he looked like he wanted to argue, he accepted that you had been organizing your research supplies and notes in quiet.

That had been 3 days ago. You had spent the research trip sticking close to your colleagues, poring over each plant and testing their uses. The princess was too distracted with her own interests to really notice how you shied away from her presence. Link had though. And he was about done with you brushing him off in favour of your work. You both were busy so not having time was nothing new. But this was different. You couldn't meet his eyes and he had caught you staring at him and Zelda as if you were about to cry before. He was at a loss and now he needed to figure things out for himself.

However he wasn't quite ready for the answer.

"I saw you and Zelda together."

His throat closed up. He wanted to say so many things. How sorry he was. How he wished he could have told you himself. How he wished he could hold you and forget how complicated things were.

"it's okay." Now that, he wasn't expecting. "I thought I could be mad at you. Both of you. But I guess... It just makes sense." You sniffled softly. You really didn't want to do this. You hated that it had to be you who gave up. But we're you really going to fight? No. As much as it tore your heart into pieces, you would stand aside for them. "I wish that things hadn't changed but, clearly you don't feel the same anymore and I don't want to hold you back. I love you. So much. But I don't deserve this, and I won't put either of us through the trouble. I hope you two are happy together Link."

As you walked towards your friends to head home Link felt his heart clench. You deserved so much better.

Sidon🦈

You were a princess from another kingdom, betrothed to Prince Sidon of the Zora. We all know how these things go, neither of you were all that fond of the idea but you would go through with it. For your kingdoms

You tried to be as understanding as possible of the situations, knowing that the prince was just as trapped as you were. So you played along with your parents wishes.

You two went on dates and spent time together, getting closer and closer until finally you kissed him.

Things were great. You were planning your wedding and enjoying the time you spent with your fiance as you prepared for your future

It wasn't until a few days before the wedding when you were trying on your dress that things fell apart.

Your dressmaker had been in a bad mood, grumbling as they worked and even sticking you with needles a few times. You would have brushed it off as a bad day if not for the facts that they seemed so unapologetic.

You finally brought it up, softly asking if there was something wrong and if you could help. They snapped, going off about how you were ruining the princes life and that he didn't love you and was only marrying you for his kingdom and that he deserved to be happy.

They realized their mistake and left quickly, leaving you alone in your wedding dress with shocked tears slipping down your face.

You later made you way to Sidons office, hoping to clear some things up and maybe seek comfort from the one you loved.

What you didn't expect was to find him already comforting someone. Your dressmaker.

You watched as he whispered sweet nothings and reassurances to them. It was when he said no matter what they were the one that he loved when you broke away.

You stood in your room, packed bags beside you. You knew there were better ways to deal with this. You knew that your kingdom was counting on you and thus marriage. You just couldn't go through with it. Not anymore.

"Y/n?"

You sound around to find the Zora princess standing in your doorway. Mipha had become a close friend in your time in the Zora domain, even feeling like family as you worked closely planning the wedding. She had once told you that you were everything she could hope for in a sister and wife for her brother. You guessed it didn't matter in the end.

Finally you choked out pained words "I can't... I just... I can't do this anymore."

"If you are feeling nervous, I can assure you my brother would never hurt you."

This made you laugh. It was cold, similar to the ice creeping into your veins. "He would. And he did." You cut off Mipha's confusion, wringing a hand through your hair, "Sidon is in love with someone else. I made every effort to work through this engagement despite our... rocky beginning. But he didn't choose me back. He never wanted me, and I won't ruin his chance to be happy."

The room was silent after your outburst. You only noticed the tears when your friend wiped them from your eyes. She offered you a small smile, sharing the pain you felt. She was losing you and still understood it was best for you. You needed to move on and save yourself from a life of pain. A life of being chosen second.

"I hope one day we can meet again, sister."

You let out a choked mix of a son and laugh. Hugging the princess before you grabbed your bags and walked out the door, out of the kingdom that stole your heart and crushed it in its hands.

"I love you, always."

#loz x reader #loz link x reader #botw link x reader #legend of zelda link x reader #breath of the wild link x reader #link x reader #botw revali x reader #breath of the wild revali x reader #botw sidon x reader #breath of the wild sidon x reader #sidon x reader #revali x reader #asks #awkward responses #angst #cheating #botw x reader

[bitsandbobsofwriting]

Twin!AU Part 3:

Hunith and Uther alike have to face the consequences of their actions, Merlin (and everyone, really) decides that family doesn’t end in blood.

Part 1   Part 2

TW: Suicidal ideation (mostly past, but it sort of... flairs up a little here I guess)

Hunith’s face falls and she physically recoils at Merlin’s harsh declaration.

His hard gaze doesn’t leave her, even as she glances at Arthur, a little behind Merlin and to his side. The blonde has his gaze fixed on Hunith, but he looks away the moment they make eye contact, unable to stand the confused pain in her expression:

“Merlin? What happened?”

Lancelot and Percival approach slowly after handing the horses off to a couple of stablehands, and Gwaine puts his hand on Merlin’s shoulder, not that The Warlock notices; he clenches his jaw tightly before speaking, but continues resisting the urge to look away:

“You lied to me. About everything.”

Hunith’s eyes go wide and she gulps, opening her mouth and shutting it again as she struggles to think of a response. It’s then that Merlin finally looks away, gazing over the top of her head at the empty courtyard. Arthur quietly intervenes, his authoritative voice full of warring emotions despite it’s low volume:

“We should take this somewhere more private.”

Merlin doesn’t even nod, just turns around and walks back towards the castle, hands clenched tightly at his side before he pushes the doors open and stalks in without looking back. Gwaine and Arthur share a concerned look before the older knight rushes after him. Arthur gestures for Hunith to go first, but not without stopping her with a hand on her shoulder, and a muttered, almost teary:

“You had no right.”

Her face falls even further, but The Regent steps back and looks away before she can reply, and she timidly hurries through the door after Merlin and Gwaine. Arthur gives Lancelot and Percival a pointed look:

“I imagine we’ll be in my chambers, make sure we are undisturbed. I don’t want anyone interrupting unless the world is about to end. Let Leon and Morgana know that they can take charge of any meetings today.”

They both nod, but Lancelot jogs up the steps to stop Arthur before he can leave:

“I... know what she did was wrong, but don’t let Merlin be too harsh. He’s always been close to his mother, he’ll regret it later if he pushes her away completely.”

Arthur almost snaps out something about how Hunith isn’t Merlin’s mother, but he keeps it to himself, sighing and nodding:

“Yeah, I know, but she... she needs to know what this has done to him, how much he’s suffered needlessly because of this. There isn’t... I know she probably just did what she thought was right but... she needs to know. Merlin deserves an apology, and he certainly deserves the truth.”

Lancelot nods hesitatingly, but doesn’t say anything else, stepping aside to allow The Regent through. He catches up to the others just as Merlin slams the door open to his chambers, continuing to not look back as he heads over to the large dining table, leaning his hand against the back of one of the chairs and staring towards the window.

Gwaine and Arthur approach slowly, standing either side of him but not touching him as they wait in suspense for someone to start the conversation. Hunith already has tears in her eyes as she stands on the other side of the table, trying and failing to get Merlin to look at her. The harsh glare he laid on her before was horrific, but this... him being unable to look at her at all, that is worse:

“Merlin, please, I only did what-”

She’s cut off by Merlin’s harsh instruction:

“Sit.”

She glances to Arthur once more, but he just nods wordlessly at the chair in front of her; the only sounds in the room are the scraping of the chair on the stone floor and Merlin’s laboured breathing. He was evidently trying very hard to hold his anger in, and when he says nothing more once she’s sat down, Gwaine puts his hand back on his shoulder. He shrugs it off, finally turning to face Hunith but remaining unable to look in her eyes:

“Why?”

A tears slips loose from her eye and she sniffles, taking a deep, shaky breath and fiddling with her hands on the table. Arthur absent-mindedly wonders if Merlin would still do that too if he’d been raised with his actual family, if it was natural, or if he’d picked it up from her:

“Please, Merlin, I’m so sorry, I didn’t-”

Merlin takes in a sharp breath, tightening his gip on the chair in a way that looks painful, shaking his head:

“No. No apologies, no excuses. I want to know exactly why you lied to me, why you took this from me.”

His voice is deadly in a quiet kind of way, like he could snap clean in two and set the world alight at any moment. Gwaine looks worriedly between the other two men, clearly thinking on the same lines as Lancelot, but neither of them notice, Merlin’s gaze stuck to the table and Arthur’s stuck on Hunith:

“I would have told you one day, Merlin, you-”

Merlin finally looks up at her, the blazing fury in his eyes contrasting in a rather horrific manner with the steady stream of tears on his cheeks:

“One day when? Arthur’s known about my magic for ages. I’ve been in Camelot for years, you have had every opportunity.”

Hunith lets out a low sob, but doesn’t look away:

“I didn’t think you were ready, Mer-”

Merlin bites his lip and turns away, running his hands through his hair harshly before turning around again, quick as lightening, and pointing an accusing finger at her:

“No, you weren’t ready! You weren’t ready to face the fact that you lied to me about who I am, because you knew you had no right, because you knew I would be angry!”

Hunith stands, but doesn’t make any moves to approach Merlin at Arthur’s harsh glare and Gwaine’s worried gesture. He doesn’t think Merlin or Arthur would hurt her, he’d never even consider the idea, but he knows that his partner needs space to be angry:

“I didn’t want you to be upset,-”

Merlin scoffs and lets out a sob of his own, wiping his face harshly before responding loudly:

“Gods, I wonder why I would be upset! Maybe because you lied to me about everything?!-”

Hunith shakes her head desperately, but Merlin carries on without pause:

“-You had no right to keep this from me! I grew up alone, with no one but you to rely on because you made me think I was some kind of beast! Keeping me from Camelot, I understand, keeping it from me as I child even, I understand. But you’ve had years of opportunity, you are selfish, a hypocrite and a coward.-”

Hunith looks horrified at his admission, mainly the sudden reveal at how her treatment of Merlin had effected him independently of the lie:

“-I hated myself, I was terrified, I didn’t want to exist, because of you! You made me think I was some kind of unnatural monster and then you sent me to Gaius under the guise of teaching me control, so he could carry on the lie for you! He promised me I wasn’t a monster, that I wasn’t born evil, over and over, but he’s lied to me from the moment I met him, how am I supposed to trust anything he says?! How am I supposed to trust anything you say when I was just some unwanted, throwaway thing that you never asked for, and got rid of at the earliest opportunity?!-”

Gwaine and Arthur stare at Merlin with matching heartbreak in their expressions; it seems that Merlin is upset at more than just the base lie. The New Prince doesn’t even try to stop the tears, his breathing quick and ragged, and after a few moments of thick silence, he takes a deep breath and quietly continues:

“-I didn’t have to be so alone, that was all you, and Gaius, and Kilgharrah, and everyone else who lied to me. When I had nothing, I had you, and you lied to me.-”

Merlin’s voice cracks, his breathing shaky and his face pale as his entire world seemingly crumbles down around him:

“-You took my brother from me and you had no right. You’re not my mother, you’re just as bad as Uther.”

With those last words, he storms from the room, Gwaine hot on his heels. Arthur stays however, feeling the need to comfort the crying woman, but also feeling, maybe slightly cruelly, that she deserves this. He sighs, pushing the though from his mind and moving around to put a hand on her shoulder as she buries her face in her hands, sobbing:

“I... you did your best, I think he knows that, but that doesn’t change what you took from him, from both of us. He needs time.”

She just about manages a nod, and Arthur sighs again, standing awkwardly for a few minutes before he realises she isn’t going to stop any time soon. He gently pushes her to sit back in the chair before heading to the door, following Gwaine and Merlin.

They’re not in the corridor when he shuts the door behind him, but he’s not surprised at that. Merlin has always been private about his true emotions, always kept them close to his chest, he wouldn’t want anyone to see him having a breakdown in the middle of the hall. Months ago, Arthur would have thought it was left over fear of his magic being discovered, but now he bitterly thinks that it probably has more to do with the way he was raised.

He runs a hand through his hair, sparing a glance to the—previously unnoticed—worried looking guards. Thankfully, they were two of the men that had been trusted with the truth (Arthur reminds himself to thank Leon later for paying attention to who was stationed where), so Arthur isn’t too worried at the fact that they had likely overheard the one-sided yelling match. He fixes them with a commanding stare and clears his throat:

“Escort the Lady Hunith to the physician’s chambers when she emerges, leave her with Gaius, but don’t rush her.-”

They bow briefly in acknowledgement of his orders, and his question comes out quietly:

“-Do you know where they went?”

They needn’t ask who, and one of the guards answers lowly, matching Arthur’s volume:

“I think they headed to Sir Gwaine’s chambers, Sire.” 

He nods and mutters a quiet thank you, slowly heading in that direction, knowing he had to go see them but also wanting to give them few extra minutes of privacy. They still had a lot to take care of, they’d missed several council meetings over the last few days, and whilst Arthur trusts Leon and Morgana to keep things rolling, he really should be making regular appearances. That, and they still haven’t dealt with Uther; to be perfectly honest, Arthur is surprised that rumours haven’t started spreading about The King’s disappearance and Arthur’s sudden growth of responsibilities, but he’s grateful. Don’t look a gift Griffin in the mouth or... something.

He finally stops outside the knight’s room—nodding at Lance who wordlessly stands guard in the corridor—before flinching at the quiet crying he can hear from inside. He knocks a few times softly before entering, shutting the door behind him and approaching the bed. Gwaine sits leant against the headboard, tears in his eyes as he holds a shaking Merlin in his arms. The Warlock lays besides Gwaine, in the middle of the bed, his face buried in the knight’s chest and his hands twisted into the fabric of his tunic.

Arthur lets out a deep, mournful breath at the sight of his brother so distraught, and he moves around to the other side of the bed, raising his eyebrow in question at Gwaine and settling next to Merlin at his singular nod. Merlin doesn’t seem to notice his presence, not until Arthur settles a hand on his back and whispers his name. He instantly calms a little, and Gwaine mentally scolds himself for the slight flair of jealousy; Merlin had discovered he has a brother, that his best friend is his brother, it’s no surprise that he calms easier in his presence, especially considering the reveal unburied so much hidden trauma.

After a few more minutes, Merlin turns to be laying on his back, though he makes sure to stay in Gwaine’s embrace. The knight leans down to press a kiss to the top of his head, and though he can’t see it, he can almost feel the slight smile on The Warlock’s face. Arthur moves his hand back to his lap, looking at the two of them out of the corner of his eye; he sees nothing but worry and utter adoration on Gwaine’s face, and he wonders just how he hadn’t approved of their relationship. Gwaine’s whispered words just solidify Arthur’s newfound belief in the man:

“I love you, Merls, no matter what.”

Merlin lets out a quiet, choked laugh, and Gwaine considers that a win, even more so when Merlin responds in kind:

“I love you.”

Despite their relationship not being a particularly new thing, Arthur hadn’t even considered the possibility that they’d reached that far, that their partnership was that solid; perhaps that had something to do with their general lack of PDA, which he had always wondered how Gwaine had put up with. He grimaces with a quiet realisation, but it catches Merlin’s gaze and he raises a questioning eyebrow, his tears thankfully dried. Arthur glances up at Gwaine, who smirks at him knowingly, before looking back down to his brother:

“Making you Crown Prince is something I’m actually quite looking forward to, but I’m going to have to crown Gwaine as well.”

Gwaine snorts in amusement but Merlin turns pink and coughs slightly:

“Well.. we haven’t really discussed marriage, Arthur.”

Arthur looks to him with an apologetic expression:

“Merlin, royals have different courting rules. Royal partnerships tend to be incredibly short before a marriage has to happen. Back when me and Gwen were courting, we hid not only because Uther wouldn’t have approved, but also because we didn’t want to rush things. I’m especially glad we did now, otherwise we would have had to be married by now. The whole kingdom know that you two have been together for at least a year, the moment you’re crowned...”

His voice trails off as he comes to a second, horrifying realisation. He stands from the bed and stares at Gwaine with wide eyes and a pale face:

“Oh my God. Oh my God. If neither me, you, or Morgana have children... once you two have been married... Gwaine will officially be third in line for the throne. Oh... fuck.”

Merlin and Gwaine freeze for just a moment before they burst into loud laughter, and Arthur shakes his head, pacing slightly and not paying attention to the knocking at the door. Lancelot walks in slowly, an amused smile of his face despite his confusion:

“Do I even want to ask?”

Arthur fixes him with an almost distraught gaze before glaring half-heartedly at Merlin:

“Why? Why couldn’t it have been Leon, or Lancelot?? Elyan or Percival?? Hell, I would have been happier with fucking George.”

Gwaine’s laughter gets even louder but Merlin calmly wipes the tears (of laughter, thankfully) from his face and looks to Lancelot with bitten lips and held in hysterics:

“Arthur just realised that once all the crowning ceremonies happen, Gwaine will be third in line for the throne, if I’m the last one to die and there aren’t any children.”

Lance’s eyes go wide and he clamps a hand over his moth in a poor attempt to hold in his laughter. He fails miserably, bursting just like Gwaine and Merlin had moments earlier. Arthur fixes an annoyed glare on him and waves a desperate hand:

“This is not funny.”

Gwaine just shakes his head as he finally manages to calm himself, wiping his face clean and sitting up straight, one hand still on Merlin’s shoulder:

“It’s hilarious, Princess. God imagine Geoffrey’s face. Imagine the council.”

Arthur just takes a deep breath and looks to the ceiling again:

“Fuck. Ok, alright, whatever. That is a problem for another time.-”

He looks back down to Merlin with an apologetic smile, after shooting one last withering glare at a still-smirking Gwaine:

“-You feeling up to council? I’ve missed a fair few, and I think it might be a good idea for you two to start making appearances as well. That and... as much as we’ve told them you have magic, it might be worth showing it off a little.-”

At Merlin’s wide, fearful eyes, Arthur holds his hands out placatingly and hurries to continue:

“-You don’t have to, but they're working on the ban repeal. Obviously not anything huge, but passing jugs or paper or whatever with magic might help desensitise them to the idea. Plus, now that you’re semi-officially royalty, and you have Gwaine or Leon trailing you almost everywhere, no one would dare attack you. And if they do, you have every right to defend yourself in whatever capacity you deem necessary.”

At Merlin’s still nervous face, Lancelot quickly tacks on:

“And they all know that Arthur would go ape-shit if anything were to happen to you.”

Arthur gestures at the knight and nods in agreement, nodding further at Gwaine’s quiet “He’s not the only one.” . Merlin takes a deep breath and shuffles off the bed, standing and straightening his clothes out with unsteady hands:

“Let’s go. You’re right, I’m going to have to get used to stupid council meetings at some point if you’re insisting on crowning me, might as well be now.”

Arthur and Lancelot smile proudly and Gwaine moves to stand at his side, straightening his own clothes before running his hands through Merlin’s hair, flattening and neatening it. Merlin stands still and lets himself be assessed and fixed with a soft smile on his face, and Arthur feels almost as if he were intruding on something personal and domestic, even more so than when they were professing their love for each other; he looks away awkwardly and Lancelot raises an amused eyebrow at him.

The four of them finally exit the room, Arthur and Merlin falling into step besides each other, Gwaine slightly behind them, and Lancelot trailing the three of them with his face pulled into a blank mask and his hand on his sword.

This time, there is no hesitation before they enter the council room, and no raised eyebrows when Merlin takes his rightful place alongside Arthur at the head of the table. Flanked by Morgana, Leon, Lancelot, and Gwaine, Arthur effortlessly takes control of the meeting, hurrying things along with a proud confidence and an easy authority that was slowly but surely being taken on by his brother, at his side.

~

The council session lasts for the remainder of the day, and though at least half of the councilmen yelp, Gaius obviously not included, when Merlin first starts floating things about or magically highlighting words or moving the room’s lighting around with a flick of his wrist, most of them are used to it by the time the sun touches the horizon.

Arthur finally calls an end to the meeting when it gets dark. Though he was in a slightly manic mood and desperate to get as much work done as possible now that he was actually free to attend meetings, he could see that the others, Merlin especially, were flagging. He knew it would happen eventually, he can’t imagine The Warlock has been sleeping much, and he definitely came to some sort of private, horrifying conclusion around half a candle-mark ago. The hitch in Merlin’s breath, the widening of his eyes, and the slight, tiny flair of every candle in the room thankfully went unnoticed by everyone bar Arthur, Gwaine, and Lancelot.

When the room empties of councilmen, Merlin stands and paces away from the table, hands fiddling roughly with his sleeves. Arthur waves Morgana and Leon away, thanking them briefly before nodding pointedly at the door. Lancelot follows shortly, and Arthur has half a mind to send Gwaine away as well, but he knows that would be somewhat selfish as the other man approaches his partner’s turned back:

“Merlin? Something wrong? I thought that went remarkably well.”

Merlin’s head turns quickly, his furrowed brows confused:

“What? What went well?”

Gwaine raises an eyebrow, glancing briefly at the neatly stacked paperwork on the table:

“The meeting? About planning your coronation and the legalisation of magic? That we’ve been in all afternoon?”

Merlin untenses slightly, turning around properly and using one hand to rub at his eyes tiredly:

“Oh, yeah right. It did go well. They didn’t freak out too much at my evil sorcery, did they?”

He tries to go for a joking smirk, but it falls flat, and Arthur walks towards him to put a hand on his brother’s shoulder:

“What’s on your mind?”

Merlin sags even more and Arthur quickly steps forward, gathering the suddenly distraught man in a tight hug. Merlin easily accepts, burying his face in Arthur’s neck and clutching the back of his tunic with shaking hands:

“I compared my mother to Uther. I told her it was her fault that I didn’t want to be alive. She’s never going to forgive me.”

Arthur shuts his eyes, stroking a hand through Merlin’s hair and muttering a quiet:

“Oh, Merlin, she loves you more than anything in this world, there’s nothing to forgive.”

Merlin doesn’t look up, but shakes his head roughly; before he can argue, Gwaine steps around the two of them, pressing a kiss to the nape of Merlin’s neck before stepping back and stroking a soft hand over his back:

“What she did was wrong, Merls, you’re allowed to be angry. And now you’re not so angry anymore you can go sit down with her and talk it out, ok? There was no way that first conversation was going to be anything other than difficult and heartbreaking, but you got through it, and now you can sort it out properly.”

Merlin relaxes just a touch, and Arthur gets the disturbing feeling swelling in his gut that Gwaine knew of Merlin’s (hopefully, former) despairs before the whole... twin thing. When The Warlock finally pulls away, he thankfully looks a little more confident, despite the drying tears on his cheeks; Arthur gives him a soft smile and nods towards the door:

“Tonight, or tomorrow?”

Merlin takes a deep, fortifying breath, and walks towards the door purposefully, wiping his face clean before taking Gwaine’s offered hand in his own:

“Tonight, now. I should... I need to talk to Gaius as well. I’ve been unfairly punishing him for long enough, I think.”

Gwaine smiles understandingly, though Arthur, who rushes to catch up and walk on Merlin’s other side, shakes his head with a frown:

“Not unfairly, Merlin. It would be well within your rights to cut them out of your life for the foreseeable future for this. But I also understand wanting to forgive them so you have more... support. They may not be blood, Merlin, but... they are family, and that’s ok.”

Gwaine gives him an annoyed look at his first words, over Merlin’s shoulder, but doesn’t say anything. Merlin stops in the middle of the hallway, suddenly and without warning, and Gwaine grunts slightly when his arm is pulled back. The Warlock spares him an apologetic smile before turning his gaze to Arthur. Arthur raises an eyebrow, but Merlin tilts his head and frowns:

“Arthur you do know that... I consider you family above all others, right? you’re right, family doesn’t have to be blood,-”

He squeezes Gwaine’s hand, almost subconsciously, and receives a gentle squeeze back:

“-but after what we’ve found out, after all of this, all that we’re doing to... fix it, to fix what was done to us... you’re everything, you’re my brother. Me forgiving Hu... my mother, and Gaius, doesn’t change that I trust you above them, I consider you before them. They’re family, but you’re family first.”

Arthur’s eyes widen slightly at Merlin’s stern assertion, but he wills the tears in his eyes to disappear as he nods once, his jaw clenched with emotion. Merlin smirks slightly and rolls his eyes, muttering something about an “emotionally repressed idiot” before pulling him into an eagerly returned hug. Gwaine just snorts at both of them, happily leaning against the wall with crossed arms as he waits. They pull away fairly quickly, hyper aware of the fact that they were in the middle of the corridor, and whilst basically the whole citadel had picked up on the fact that something had changed, is changing, they didn’t want to let on too much until official public announcements were made.

They hurry in their journey to the Physician’s chambers, it was getting late and they wanted to sort this out as soon as possible; Gods know Merlin isn’t going to sleep a wink until he's spoken to his mother again.

They pause momentarily outside the door, taking deep breaths as they attempt to block out the hushed conversations coming from inside, not wanting to eavesdrop. Merlin turns to Gwaine with a nervous frown:

“Would you mind... waiting out here? Just for a minute?”

Gwaine gives him a soft smile and nods, pressing a kiss to his forehead and muttering “Call for me when you want me to come in, alright? I’m not going anywhere.” before giving Arthur an encouraging clap on the shoulder and stepping back to lean against the opposite wall.

Arthur sends a grateful smile the knight’s way, receiving a respectful nod in return, before he turns to the door. After a nod from Merlin, he raises a hand that shakes only slightly, and knocks. The murmured conversations stop immediately, and Gaius’ voice calls out:

“Enter.”

With one last look to each other, the brothers open the door and walk in together, shutting it gently behind them and turning to face the shocked pair. Hunith stares at Merlin with tears in her hopeful eyes, but Gaius quickly clears his throat and stands straight:

“How can I help, My Lords?”

Arthur sighs and Merlin shakes his head at the Physician’s formal address of them, rubbing a tired hand over his eyes before taking a small step forward :

“Don’t... I’m not... just Merlin, please.-”

His voice is quiet and tired, and the pleading tone it takes on deepens Arthur’s frown. He lets out a shaky breath, biting his lip before looking up to Hunith and continuing:

“-I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled. And I didn’t have any right to say those things; you’re... you’re nothing like Uther, and you did your best in a terrifying situation. You didn’t know any better, I shouldn’t blame you for how I turned out.”

Hunith’s tears overflow once again, and she takes in a shuddering breath as she steps hesitatingly towards the Warlock:

“Oh, my boy, you were right. I wasn’t ready to lose you, and I let that fear overcloud my judgement of what I knew to be right. I’m so sorry sweetheart, I should have told you who you were a long time ago, and it wasn’t fair of me to expect Gaius to carry on the lie, especially when you met Arthur, and especially when he found out about your magic.”

With that, Merlin pulls her into a tight hug, height difference be damned as he buries his face in her neck and shakes. Arthur gulps as he looks upon the scene, sharing a small, mournful smile with Gaius, the Physician understanding The Regent’s forgiveness in the small nod of his head. The hug doesn’t last quite as long as Arthur was expecting, though he supposes that forgiveness is more than just saying it aloud, and Merlin still has a great deal of self-worth related issues to get over, thanks to Hunith’s overly cautious raising of the boy. The Warlock clears his throat, his hands still on his mother’s shoulders as he gives her a weak smile:

“Igraine says thank you, by the way, for raising me with so much love.”

Hunith lets out a small chuckle, wiping away Merlin’s tears with soft hands:

“It was my honour,  I’m glad that your... mother, is pleased.”

Merlin’s frown is brief, and he responds quickly:

“You’re my mother.”

Hunith’s smile grows, as does Merlin’s and she nods shakily, almost whispering:

“Ok... I... ok.”

Merlin lets go hesitatingly, but turns to Gaius after a moment or two. The Physician quickly interrupts anything the younger man could have said with a shake of his head and a soft smile, pulling him into a hug as he softly speaks:

“It’s alright, my boy. You were well within your rights to be angry, we had no right to lie to you in such a way.”

With Gaius and Merlin’s soft conversation happening to the side of the room, Hunith turns to Arthur with a hopeful smile on her face. He returns it faintly, and she pulls him into his own hug. He stiffens in her hold, wide eyes darting around the room as he clenches his hands at his side. It only takes her stroking a hand through his knotted hair for him to relax and hug her back:

“I’m honoured to have been able to raise your brother, Arthur, and I am sorry for keeping him from you for so long, it was selfish of me. I didn’t consider what you were losing, in not knowing that you weren’t alone, only what I would lose should I tell the truth.”

Arthur gulps and nods, but tightens his hold on her as the tears come to his eyes:

“It’s... ok. I understand, I think. The danger you put yourself in to raise and protect him was immense, I just wished I’d known sooner, so I could have done all of this sooner.”

They pull back, but Hunith keeps a tight hold on Arthur’s shoulders, an assessing frown on her face as she raises a hand to cup his cheek. Arthur leans into it, blushing slightly under her motherly gaze:

“I know. But you’re doing wonderfully, Arthur. You and Merlin will be the saviours of this Kingdom, I’m sure of it. Your mother would be so proud of you.”

A tear slips loose from Arthur’s eye as he harshly bites his lip. His voice comes out small and unsure, and Hunith has to resist the urge to pull him into another hug:

“You think?”

She just smiles and nods instead:

“I’m sure.”

Merlin and Gaius look upon the scene fondly, and Arthur’s blush deepens when he catches them staring. He steps back from Hunith who smirks at him knowingly as he frowns at Merlin:

“Shut up, Merlin.”

He just laughs and shakes his head:

“I always knew you had a soft spot for my mum.”

The Regent shakes his head and rolls his eyes, ignoring Merlin’s continued laughter:

“Either of you eaten? I’m starved.”

Gaius and Hunith’s smiles come a lot easier at that, and they shake their heads. Arthur leads the way out of the chambers, smiling and nodding at Gwaine’s raised eyebrow. The knight returns the smile, quickly sidling up to Merlin and re-taking his hand as Arthur speaks:

“I’ll let the kitchens know to have five meals sent up to my chambers, I’ll see you there in a moment.”

They part ways in the corridor, all of them with easy smiles and lighter hearts, especially when Gwaine eagerly regales his interpretation of Arthur’s reaction to having to crown him.

~

The next morning was once again tense. Arthur’s assertion late last night that he intended to finally deal with Uther weighs heavy in everyone’s minds.

Hunith and Gaius are once again tucked safely into the Physician’s chambers, and all of the King’s most trusted knights are called to stand guard in the corridor. Merlin and Arthur wear their smart clothes (a suggestion by Morgana that Gwaine thought was funny enough that he begged and begged until Merlin gave in), and they take in with them Leon and Morgana. 

Uther looks manic, his hair unkept, his face unshaven. His clothes are clean at least, but they’re rumpled, likely due to the near constant pacing of the former King. The room is dark, the curtains obviously haven’t been opened in several days, but the dim candles highlight the mess throughout the room. Uther may still be being passed meals by the guards, but out of concern for the staff’s safety, no servants were granted access to tidy or otherwise serve. 

His head whips around when the door opens, his enraged face turning red at the four people stood smartly by his door. He storms towards them, but Morgana, no longer scared of the consequences, holds a hand out and mutters a few golden words, halting him in his tracks. He apparently hasn’t lost his voice though, as he turns to Merlin:

“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY DAUGHTER?! YOU-”

Merlin rolls his eyes and clicks his fingers, his eyes also turning golden as Uther’s mouth shuts with a clack. Leon manages to hold his smirk in, just stands still as the perfect guard, his hand on the hilt of his sword, but Morgana doesn’t even try, smiling openly. Merlin holds Uther’s furious gaze for a few more moments before looking to Arthur at his side, tilting his head in question. The Regent nods at him before stepping forward, his back straight and his face and voice Kingly:

“You will listen, and you will listen well, because I will not repeat myself. You are the only abomination in this room, and you will live with that for the rest of your days. How long that is, is up to you. I am Regent, soon enough I will be King, Myrddin will be Crown Prince, and Morgana will be Princess; when that happens, magic will finally be fully legalised, and the public will be made aware of your crimes. I will not hide things from my people, not like you have. No matter what you deserve, I struggle to bring myself to sentence you to execution, and you’ll be humiliated to learn, I imagine, that Merlin argued in favour of letting you keep your head when I brought it up.-”

Uther glances angrily at Merlin, but looks back to Arthur when he realises that he’s still incapable of speaking:

“-Therefor your options are as follows: You may go to the summer home on the coast, where you will be under constant guard, but will otherwise have a semi-free life. You will stay in Camelot, but live out the remainder of your days in this room only. Or me and Merlin will take a week long trip away to, say, Nemeth, whilst Princess Morgana and Sir Leon announce, organise, and undergo your execution. You have today to decide, we’ll be back this evening.”

Arthur doesn’t bother waiting for a reaction, turning his back on Uther and gesturing the others to lead the way through the door. He pauses momentarily, one hand on the door frame as he turns back, a mournful frown on his face as he quietly speaks:

“If you had just told the truth, if you had just owned up to making a mistake, you, me, Myrddin, Morgana, we... we could have been a family. You’re the one that ruined that, you’re the one that tore us apart, and I swear to you now, that whatever option you pick, I will never forgive you.”

That only seems to enrage Uther more, but Arthur isn’t quite sure why he bothered to hope for another reaction. He shuts the door behind him, waving at Merlin to reset the magical locks as he sighs and rubs tired hands over his face:

“Well at least that’s over and done with.”

Leon pats him on the shoulder consolingly, and Elyan raises an eyebrow, glancing around at the others and sighing when he realises no one else is going to ask:

“He didn’t take it well then, I’m guessing?”

Arthur takes a deep breath and stands straight, shaking his head. Morgana is the one to answer however, and Arthur appreciates the way she makes a genuine attempt to keep the humour out of her voice:

“No, he wasn’t best pleased, but I think he’s accepted that he has well and truly lost this battle. Something he’s not entirely used to, I suppose.”

The knights nod in understanding, and Merlin lets out a deep breath, tilting his head slightly:

“Weird to think that he’s my... dad... ugh.”

They all chuckle at that, even Arthur, though they all stop with concerned frowns when Merlin suddenly straightens up with wide eyes and an open mouth:

“Oh... my God... how did I...- What?!”

Arthur puts a hand on his shoulder, his frown deepening:

“Merls?”

The Warlock just ignores him, turning to Morgana with still wide eyes:

“You’re my sister! I’ve been focusing so much on how Arthur’s my brother that I didn’t even consider the fact that you’re my sister!”

Morgana takes in a sudden breath, and all bar Leon (who just raises an eyebrow and then rolls his eyes when he realises that he’s the only one unsurprised by this) stare at the two of them in shock. Morgana slowly pulls Merlin into a hug, and the two of them clutch each other tightly as a grin grows on Arthur’s face. Leon gives him another clap on the back, this one more congratulatory (if a little confused. Honestly, how did they miss that?), and the others cheer just as Gwen turns the corner into the corridor. She smiles confusedly at Merlin and Morgana, still hugging, as she sidles up to Leon, whispering:

“What’s the occasion? They find Uther dead?”

Leon laughs but shakes his head, leaning down to mutter his response:

“They only just now figured out that they’re siblings.”

She looks up to him quickly with a disbelieving raise of the eyebrows:

“Wait, just now as in, just now?-”

Leon smirks and nods firmly, and Gwen shakes her head as she laughs:

“-It’s been almost a week.”

Leon laughs as well leaning against the wall as the others chatter excitedly among themselves:

“Yeah, apparently you and I are the only ones who had considered the idea. These are all the smartest people I’ve ever come across...”

He trails off, but Gwen looks up at him with a teasing smirk:

“And yet sometimes...?”

They both laugh quietly, shaking their heads when Percival catches their eyes and tilts his head in question.

The group walks away soon enough, heading to one of the smaller dining rooms for an early lunch and a chance to discuss their intentions for this afternoon’s council meeting. Morgana, Merlin, and Arthur walk together, and conversation flows between all bar Gwaine, who stares at the back of his now betrothed’s head with the quiet adoration and lowly simmering excitement of someone that knew the man he loves is finally getting all that he deserves.

~

END of Part 3!!!

Part 4 will be VERY short. Will be just about post coronation and public announcement, will probably contain Merwaine’s wedding, some casual magic, some more family bonding.

I hope y’all enjoyed this!!! I wrote it surprisingly quickly once I set my mind to it

#merwaine #bbc merlin #good morgana #protective arthur #platonic merthur #hunith and arthur bonding!! #hunith basically adopts arthur #hunith really goes: time to add another prince who isn't actually mine to the family #merlin and arthur are twins #protective gwaine #king arthur #arthur pendragon #uther is a dick #morgana #everyone knows about everyones magic #sir leon #leon #sir gwaine #gwaincelot #sir percival #percival #sir lancelot #lancelot #sir elyan #gwen #guinevere #gaius #kilgharrah #angst #angst with a happy ending