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#I'm moving this month after thinking I'd be moving in june
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HA I'm 100% not making this camp nanowrimo goal
#I have written: 800 words so far wITH THE GOAL TO WRITE 10K?? HAHHAA#what's funny is I wrote 10k in February#about 20k in Jan#couple thousand in Dec#50k in nov#SO TELL ME WHY I'M DISAPPOINTED BY THE IDEA OF NOT HITTING THIS GOAL#listen... not making the goal doesn't make me feel sad because I'm not making the goal#makes me feel sad because idk! I love writing! I want to do that! I love living IN it#and for me living in it is soooo in the drafting process#and I feel like I've done a really... wonderful job at prioritizing writing & now I'm realizing I need to be#gentle with myself LOL#I'm moving this month after thinking I'd be moving in june#OBVIOUSLY I just finished my degree#I'll be moving into my own room (FIRST TIME EVER!! HAVING MY OWN ROOM!! A CONCEPT!!) when I get back home#lots of change haha#I think the mental strain of all of that has just made me tired#but it's not like I don't want to write ! I do! but I'm tired and that's what makes me sad#not being able to do the thing because I'm tired!#anyway I don't usually care this much about progress but I guess#since nano it's been nice to see the “progress” not because it's progress but because#to me it shows that I'm doing this thing I love very much#anyway proud of me for all I do!#I actually think this is why write every day works better for me than word count goals#(THE HORRORS THAT I ACTUALLY FOLLOW THIS ADVICE NOW HAHAHA)#but I liked that better cuz it was like... oh if I literally write ONE word I hit that goal LMAO#think I'll pivot my goal to that and whatever I write I write!#also writing frequently is kind of a must for me considering my short term memory is just awful#I find I get confused and flustered and overwhelmed when I don't write for a couple days#but yeah one word a day??? i can do that!
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taylor-titmouse · 4 months
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2023 Book Retrospective
it's pretty much the end of the year, and i've never done this before, but i wanted to take a look at what i managed to do in 2023 and share some of my thoughts on it! i published five novellas this year (though i didn't actually write one of them) plus the public release of the demo and first huge update to You're A Mage on Monsterfuck Mountain. that's a lot!
so let's dig into all that. this will contain some spoilers for the books, because it's hard to talk about them without talking about what's in 'em, so maybe check out my itchio first and grab anything you missed! (but also.... perhaps wait until this weekend before you buy anything. shh.)
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You're A Mage on Monsterfuck Mountain, released in March
TECHNICALLY, the demo was finished and available on patreon around the end of last year, and didn't become public until I'd finished the garden update, which i did finish this year. and what a massive fuckin THING that was. 60k words! 50 illustrations!! the biggest thing i ever put out and technically finished, and the beginning of a move to being less afraid of writing "weird" sex. there was so much bee sex in it. arguably too much bee sex in it. which i'd left entirely til last to do which meant i was writing nothing but bee sex for weeks.
this was the first time i let myself really indulge in writing dubcon for the bad endings, and it was a lot of fun. very often it was more interesting than the deliberately horny routes, because it meant writing a way to be put in the situation, and also making it hot every time. i'm very much of the philosophy with dubcon that even if the situation wasn't Ideal for the character, they're still going to get good sex out of it. i believe i put it at another point as, i'm here to write the pleasure of helplessness, not suffering. to that point, the dubcon endings for the armor, the dryad, and the queen bee were my favorite bits from this.
the fact i never got a second update out this year is a big regret. i finished a bunch of the routes for it, but ultimately i wanted to have things i could release! shortly after publishing the demo and update, i officially put my webcomic on hiatus so i could focus more on my graphic novel, and also spend more time on my writing. having that extra time is probably the only reason i was able to write as much as i did this year, and i didn't want to spend it toiling away on a serial project i couldn't release for months at a time.
which leads us to the release of my first novella of the year...
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House of the Risen King, released in April
now this is when i truly said "i'm just going to write what i think is hot and interesting and not worry about how it's perceived!!" and went whole hog on exhibitionism and monster dubcon cult horror. house was mostly inspired by the ending of Hereditary, and was originally going to be more poltergiesty and played more straight, with vee being harangued by a bunch of horny ghost-demons and nothing more sinister than that. but i've had cult shit percolating at the back of my brain forever, and i wanted to play with ideas i'd first developed in shadow in the shelves with rituals and shadows, so here we are! the scene of hettie fingering vee in the bathtub while vee's god-fucked out of her mind is my favorite.
fun fact, the original seed for this book was actually going to feature max and mortis, my photographer/model couple (that link goes to cohost because i wasn't posting here yet when i was drawing them the most). the idea was they'd go do an urban exploration shoot and mortis would start getting fucked by a ghost while max filmed it, but the more time i spent with those characters the less i wanted to involve the supernatural. which meant i never wrote their book, and had to make a new character to do the idea. and then it wasn't even that idea anymore.
that's writing, folks
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Roger Crenshaw: The Dogs at Duskfall, released in June
... which makes it ironic that the next book is one i didn't even write! r/l monroe @mortalityplays has been my friend for years, and was my editor for a long time (until he got a REAL JOB and didn't have TIME to edit anymore. sobs, cries, kicks a stone and walks into the distance). he's also always been an incredible writer, and for my birthday this year i asked him to write me something. i asked with the expectation of a little short story about our old tabletop RP characters, or a fanfic scene for one of my books he'd edited.
and then he wrote me 20,000+ words digging into the character of roger crenshaw and who he is that perfectly summed him up and tied all his stories together, such that i don't think i ever need to write another one. he did it, he wrote the perfect ending to roger. AND he did it using my favorite of his ocs from our tabletop campaign, AND there's some really hot and sweet smut in it. AND HE DID IT IN LIKE TWO WEEKS.
i loved it so much that i asked if i could illustrate and publish it as an official novella, and to my delight he agreed, and it was so so nice to collaborate with him on it. even if it meant beating our heads against the wall for 30 minutes about the placement of certain images on the page.
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this was a great tragedy. i'd drawn the vagina one first, but an image earlier in the book had to be moved, which affected the placement of everything else. the vagina image had been perfectly at the start of a new page, and then suddenly it wasn't. so i had to do the penis one instead for better placement. tragic!!!
it's hard to pick a favorite scene in something written entirely, lovingly for you. how can i choose between the characters' pitch perfect semantic arguments on the nature of folk lore, the millenium princess-ass memory hopping, or the really really hot smut? i can't. i love it all. thank you r/l for being so good at what you do and writing this for me, i'll treasure it always.
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The Dragon Double Feature, released in May
apparently this came out in may, and not july. i don't know why i've been convinced this came out in july. oh well i can't be bothered to insert it on top of the roger one.
anyway. THIS book. this book exists because i believe at the time i was a bit blocked, and wanted to just write SOMETHING. for a long time i've had the idea of a dragon wrecking a princess' wedding and fucking her in front of the congregation just sitting in my back pocket. it was the 'i know i could just slam this out if i wanted. i don't have to care about it it's just sex and then it's done' fallback idea, and i finally did it!
and then it was too short. i don't like the idea of publishing anything less than 10k words for full price, so i was like. okay. alright. i've always thought fucking an eastern dragon would be hot and have this other idea i was going to use for roger (back when i had an idea for every monster possible for roger), let's just write that. kenta is only kenta because i took a poll for what body type i should pair with a dragon (he was 'big boy', i think the other options were twink, older woman, and average woman). and i was also Really into the movie inu-oh at the time, which is probably obvious with kenta being a blind musician, lol.
the musician and the waterfall was tougher to write because i didn't have a clear vision of how it should end or even how they should fuck (the mechanics of fucking long noodle dragon have challenged me for years) but i'm ultimately pleased with it. it would have been a long time since i wrote something sincerely romantic, and it was nice to go back to it. i'm a HUGE romantic at heart.
both stories are pretty much one extended scene so it's hard to pick a favorite moment from them, but i will say i'm very pleased with how i approached writing the musician and the waterfall, specifically in the challenge i set myself to never use visual description kenta couldn't reasonably guess. writing from the POV of a blind man made me focus in on different senses and ways to describe them.
this book is also, as of right now, my best seller. which is great! i love that for me.
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The Dragon Double Feature 2, released in July
okay i guess THIS one released in july.
anyway i got stricken with the curse with this one. a lot of people wanted me to write a sequel, but i wasn't going to. and every time i say i'm not going to do something, i end up doing it. it's so annoying. this one only happened because i wanted to write a SHORT! a SHORT extra for patreon describing kenta and wakatake's first time having sex as humans.
and then i wrote too much preamble describing their time on the beach. and then i got emotionally invested in unpacking their actual relationship, and also added a third character with mrs arakawa, and had to bring it all together into a story that was coherent and had something to say about the way they loved and ALSO ended in a THREESOME because WHATS THE POINT OF INTRODUCING A THIRD CHARACTER if they aren't all going to FUCK TOGETHER!!
it was tough. but i'm really, really happy with it in the end, and think it's one of the best things i've ever written. my favorite scene is definitely them playing with the hermit crab on the beach. metaphors babie.
the gundrid/eveline story is fine too. lmao. i NEVER PLANNED TO WRITE ANOTHER WITH THEM!! i only did it because the idea of publishing a sequel to a story from a double feature without writing a sequel to the other half of the feature was insane. and now eveline and gundrid are some of my most beloved characters, to the point of writing another book featuring them...
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The Tenebrous Tower, released November
yet another book i'm pretty sure i was like 'i don't need to write this. this character doesn't work for a story on his own, what am i ever gonna do with him' and then i dumped a bunch of fantasy characters into a jar with him and suddenly i had a story. I ONLY MADE ROMICK BECAUSE I WANTED TO DRAW FUCKED UP WIZARD PORN AND MY ONLY OTHER OPTION WAS A GRANDPA!!!
anyway i started writing it as something to do on vacation, and it was just gonna be a bunch of dungeon bdsm vignettes until i hit on a throughline and suddenly i had a story and an emotional arc and damn i did it again. i did it again. i have a book.
i was expecting this one not to do very well because it had multiple prerequisites, but because i am a master of my craft i made sure to write it so you didn't need to read those. and then people read it without reading those. so it worked out anyway and now it's done just about as well as dragons 2. the people love romick, but they especially love the idea of him being destroyed. maybe someday. maybe someday. (except on patreon, where it's already happened)
the final vignette with the doll is, of course my favorite. i think it was a lot of people's favorites.
............................................
and that's everything i published this year! honorable mention to my novel starbuster, which i'd written most of last year, then spent all of october this year revising with the intent of finishing it, only to run out of steam by the time i was done revising it. so it's exactly where i left it last year. just better written. god it would be nice to finish that fuckin thing next year.
my goals for 2024 are, of course: release more books!! i have a big project i've been working on illustrating for the past month that i'd like to release in january, and i've also been working on a spin-off one-shot with mrs arakawa and an oni. i think this coming year i want to Try to blast through some of the one-off ideas i developed this year so they'll quit banging cowbells in my brain. like the sleeping garden. it makes me insane i never actually wrote the sleeping garden.
anyway if you actually made it to the end of this, thank you!! if you've bought all of these books, double thank you!!! i've been able to pay my rent and expenses just with my adult work this year, and it's been amazing and fun and super fulfilling. thank you for supporting me in 2023, here's to a horny 2024!!
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drarrily-we-row-along · 6 months
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Hey everyone.
Maybe some of you have noticed that my writing's been super sporadic since like June (if you haven't that's very okay) but I just wanted to write a little bit about what's been happening in my life because it's had a pretty big impact on my writing.
It turns out that I'm actually ace.
So, if you happen to notice an uptick in me writing fics with ace characters who still get to be loved, I'm just trying to process a thing.
Please feel free to skip the rest of this post if you're not interested in the harrowing journey of self discovery. I am absolutely giving too much information about my life, I'm just really working at processing everything and I'm hoping writing it out will help. And honestly, there have been some beautiful souls in the Tumblr community who have given me some beautiful encouragement (including but not limited to @basicallyahedgehog who answered an anon ask I sent them the other day with so much kindness and encouragement because I'd bawled my eyes out about one of their fics featuring ace Harry/Draco.).
(Anyway. If you want to read a ramble about all of the things I'm struggling with at the present moment, I'm gladly accepting advice and kindness at this time. Please read below the cut and chime in if you have anything hopeful to add.)
For most of my life I've pretty comfortably called myself a "picky bi" and in the past couple of years have labeled myself "demisexual" because I'm not sex repulsed; I've had sex, it was fine/good when it's with someone who I'm in love with. I moved on from the labeling, content with the label I'd given myself and whatnot.
It's been a minute (read: 8+ years) since I've been in a relationship that got to the point where I've considered having sex but I didn't really think all that much of it. In retrospect, I think this is largely because I've grown a lot in terms of self respect and honoring my own autonomy. Somewhere around 25, I started saying no when I didn't want something and if the other person didn't respect that decision they were not worth my time.
Anyway, it didn't really occur to me that perhaps going nearly a decade without thinking about/wanting to have sex with anyone (and without experiencing even vague aesthetic attraction to someone with only the odd exception here and there- some of you saw that post a couple of months ago, apparently just having the thought that someone is pretty isn't the same as attraction that allo people experience- so that panic now seems pretty unnecessary. It literally boggles my mind that people can just see a person they've never met and want to have sex with them. Anyway, I'm digressing.) Apparently, it's not a common occurrence even among demisexuals to go that long without thinking about sex if you have emotional intimacy with people (which I do). So fast forward to June when I went to a conference for lgbtqia christians and started listening to people talk about attraction.
To say that my experience of attraction and desire for sex is profoundly different than that of nearly all of the people that I talked to at that conference would be an understatement.
After that conference, I started talking to a lot of friends about their experience of attraction and their desire for sex (eventually this also included some new friends who are demi/ace) and have been a little flabbergasted by their responses. Suddenly, in light of the fact that my body doesn't interpret a lot of things the way that other peoples' seem to, a lot of things started to make sense.
I've been called a flirt (at best, and a [cock]tease in more unpleasant moments) my entire life because I always want to give people gentle physical affection; I love holding hands, touching people on the arm while we're having a conversation, playing with peoples' hair, hugging, leaning, the list is long- none of those things have ever felt like flirting to me. Every one of those actions was the end in itself, there was no artifice in my touches, no desire or even thought for more, but APPARENTLY that is not the thing that happens in a lot of peoples' bodies. It is incomprehensible to me that simple, affectionate touches are not something that everyone just wants to do to anyone that they harbor platonic affection for. This also applies to the way that I communicate with people. Again, I've been called a flirt, been told that I'm intense, been told that I'm trying to 'steal' peoples' boy/girl friends simply by being friends with them. APPARENTLY, showing "too much" interest in other peoples' lives and hobbies is flirting. APPARENTLY, getting really excited for people who are excited and doing cool things is flirting. Because (or so I have been told) the emotional energy I expend is too much to just be friends; surely, I have another angle.
Next, in terms of attraction, I experience attraction to beautiful things in nature in the same way that I experience it to people. If I'm being honest, nature makes my heart sing in a way that people usually don't. I can get caught up in the beauty of the world; the vastness of the ocean for literal hours, in the majesty of the mountains, the strength of trees, the way water carves a path through the rocks in glens and waterfalls. The world takes my breath away, it makes me weep just to exist in nature. Apparently, this in not everyone's experience of nature and apparently, many people who want to have sex don't think that trees, or bodies of water, or mountains have as much (or more, in my humble opinion) appeal than humans.
It's come to my attention that even the way that I have experienced heart break from relationships where I was "in love" and having sex is not the way that people typically experience heartbreak. All heart break feels the same to me; grieving leaving a job, grieving the death of a loved one, grieving horrible things that happen to my students, grieving the loss of friendships, and grieving the loss of a relationship feel like the same heart break. (Like some of those things hurt worse than others but the heart break over the loss of a relationship isn't worse.) One of my friends mentioned that I grieve the passing of summer into autumn (I fucking hate the winter) like the loss of a relationship and I wish I could say that she is wrong. I've been told my whole life that I experience my emotions too big and I just can't help but wonder if there is some sort of correlation there, but I digress.
The literal dream for my life is to have someone who wants to get in the car or on a plane and travel with me. Someone who I can make coffee for in the mornings and who wants to cook me dinner at night. Someone who wants to sit on the couch after a long day at work and talk about nothing, or watch a show, or just exist together. Someone who wants to dance with me in the kitchen, and hold my hand while we walk, who wants to smile at me while I ramble about nature. I want someone who wants to hold me when I cry, who wants to listen to me when I'm mad, someone who will remind me to take a break when I'm working too hard. The only thing that I actually want from a partner is just someone to do life with. It's not that I'm opposed to sex, it's just that it literally doesn't matter.
(So many things in past relationships, so many fights, so many of the reasons that I was left, so many things that I JUST DIDN'T UNDERSTAND make sense now. Or at least they're starting to.)
So. In the process of understanding this complete fuckery, of trying to put all of the pieces that haven't quite made sense in my life into order, in the end of July my best friend told me that she's in love with me.
And on the one hand, I'm fucking over the moon, delighted, honored, speechless, crazy-happy. She's literally the best person I have ever known, she's the kindest, sweetest, most loyal, loving, amazing human being to ever exist. She loves me so well, so completely, like all of the things that I said above that are my dream; that is her. We road trip together, and she lets me braid her hair, and we snuggle on the couch and watch movies, and we talk for hours (literally hours, when we road trip we go for 7-10 days at a time and I like do not shut the fuck up for more than like 5 minutes total the entire day and she loves me; loves listening to me talk about whatever is in my brain), and when I'm going on and on about how pretty things are in nature she looks at me like I'm the pretty thing (when I say, 'oh my gosh. that mountain, tree, lake, ocean, etc. is so beautiful.' she literally says 'you're so beautiful' and I am deceased, my heart can't take it, I can't fucking stop smiling- I don't even want to), and she lets me info dump about whatever I'm learning, and she loves my brain and my stupid adhd, and she plays me sappy love songs and sings them to me (and she sings in my car, sings to me even though she doesn't sing in front of people) and and and... she makes me feel like I'm good. She makes me feel like I'm all of the things that other people have said I'm not.
And I am constantly terrified of hurting her.
There are a variety of reasons we're not planning on having sex (partially because it's not really something that I want) that I'm not going to get into but I'm afraid of being what I've been to other people. I'm afraid of her feeling like I'm pushing her buttons because I just always want to be touching her (very platonically) like just having our shoulders bumping while we walk, or putting my head on her shoulder when we're on the couch, or letting our elbows press against one another while we're in the car. BUT what happens in our bodies when we're touching like that is really different. Like I described above, for me any type of touch is really the end goal in and of itself (if I'm braiding her hair, it's safe to assume that that is all I want to be doing. If I'm leaning against her on the couch, that too is what I'm wanting.) But that's not always how her body wants to interpret touch, even if she logically knows that I'm not intentionally teasing (she would never say that she feels like I'm trying to tease her, for the record, it's just the easiest way for me to articulate what it feels like could be happening).
And I love her so much, like so much; I'd do anything for her but it's not the same kind of love that she feels for me. By which I mean that she is just really gay and actively attracted to me emotionally/physically but for me if she started dating someone else, I'd be actually fine with that. If she was dating/having sex with someone I wouldn't be jealous, as long as we still get to be friends. (And maybe her dating would necessarily change the dynamic of our friendship and that would be really hard but that's a different mental exercise.) This isn't the way that she feels.
She is so special and important to me but even the way that we are aware of the other person's presence is different. For me, if I'm in a group of people and she's there, I'm aware of that on some level but it's not at the forefront of my mind. My brain is always sort of 'triaging' the people around me when they're my friends; who's being too quiet? who has been going through a rough patch with work/family, etc? who has an exciting new thing they need someone to squeal about with them? who hasn't been included in the conversation in too long? (see the paragraph above about flirting. haha.) She's there but she often isn't the first person I'm thinking about because I talk to her almost every day, I get to love her every day, and odds are good that we either drove together or will talk on the phone our way home from the event- I see the other people there less, so my brain just prioritizes them since I have less time to love them. (This is actually really good, healthy progress for me in terms of healthy attachment and not forming a codependent relationship. My therapist and I are really proud of the work I'm doing, but I'm digressing again.) For her, though, she always knows exactly where I am. It is work for her to pay attention to other conversations, work to be in a different room. In most situations, I am the person she defaults to thinking about and wanting to be near and she has to actively choose other things if she wants to. (And I don't mean to sound like an absolute asshole, it's not like I ignore her or anything, and I'm delighted for us to be in the same conversations, it's just a different way that we engage with the world.)
I love her so much. And I'm afraid of messing everything up. Of hurting her. Of asking too much of her without asking for anything at all. I try to let her be the one to initiate physical touch (or I ask first) because sometimes it's too hard on her body and that's fair. I feel frustrated with the different ways that we experience love for each other because the way that she loves me feels so good and safe to me and it makes me feel so happy. I'm afraid that the way that I love her doesn't feel as nice for her, that it feels less than, that the way I express my love and devotion isn't as good. I'm afraid that the way she loves me is going to wear her out. She always says she knows I love her just as much as she loves me, it's just different. She says she's okay, she says that the way I love her is good for her and she's happy. But it's hard to believe.
I'm afraid that she'll fall in love with someone else who can love her the way she loves and I won't matter to her anymore (partially because that's been my experience of people who have said they're in love with me). I'm afraid.
Is it even fair to entertain the idea of maybe having a whole life together? (we're already entertaining the ideas, already daydreaming about 'what if we lived together', where we're going on our next road trip, etc. And I'm terrified.) Is it asking her to give up too much? I would spend the rest of my life with her. I'd be good and kind to her, I would love her with so much tenderness. But is it enough? Am I enough with just the things that I have to give? Is it actually possible for someone to love me for just me and not for the ways that I could contort myself to be something I'm not?
I recognize the irony in what I'm asking. I know that that's what all of these hundreds of stories I've written here say, it's what I want to believe. But is it even possible when it's reality?
I don't know. Does anyone have any good advice? Any ace people out there living with a person who's in love with them? Does anyone have something that's lasted?
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meidomatsuri · 5 months
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I'm not someone who usually reposts other people's art, but i think this one needs to be remembered from an historical standpoint for the Kirby fandom.
This is Meta-Knight.SERVEbeer. Perhaps the very first Meta Knight dedicated shrine and website from a fan only known as M. Swift, from all the way to the year 2002. Here the artist would upload their fanart and show their dedication to the character.
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The earliest saved page in the Internet Archive dates to November 28, 2002. Keep in mind, latest Kirby game released to that date was Nightmare in Dreamland, being out the month before. So the artist only had a handful of games pre-Amazing Mirror and Kirby: Right back at ya! to work with.
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The last time the page was saved was in June 12, 2004, with Air Ride and Amazing Mirror to work with. Nothing was heard from the artist after that.
Not sure if they moved to deviantart or another site but i'd know to know what happened to them. Also it seems that the last fanart uploaded to this site wasn't archived properly and got lost in the way. Bummer.
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I love finding scraps of the oldest parts of a fandom, especially the Kirby one. You would think that this community began around 2010 but as you can see, this type of dedication to the borb was already a thing way before some people here were even born.
You can see the website via The Old Web.
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Letters to G. Weasley. [g.w. x reader]
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Inspired by Letters to Milena.
You left me in that beautiful heap of dazzles and brilliance; your recalcitrance with your brother— just to send a message.
Do you know how I felt when I saw what you left in the sky on the morning of my NEWTS; your farewell to Hogwarts while we were all stuck under the authoritarian regime of that daft pink woman.
I was so, so, so devastated.
I spent my nights crying, you git. You didn't tell me you were leaving.
- Y/N, May 14, 1996.
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Dear George,
I've come to peace with you after ignoring all your owls. Yes, I'm writing back to you. Yes, I've decided to address you, unlike my last letter, if you still have it.
Even though I dearly, passionately, and remarkably hate you; I still miss your voice.
I've graduated from Hogwarts and I'm joining the Ministry. Has your shop been doing well? Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, was it? Never mind that I'll get straight to the point. No more preamble.
I'd like to see you, if you'd wish to, of course. I've moved on from that undesirable spring.
I fully understand if you wish not to. You can be a man of deep-seated grudges, after all.
I'll leave it up to you, and I most favourably look forward to your reply.
Yours,
Y/N, June 21, 1997
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George.
It's been a rough month. I know it's been tougher for you, too. Is your ear, or lack thereof, okay? From what I understand from your letter, you're currently hiding in Sirius Black's family's manor with The Order, and the Burrow's gone? I cannot fathom this.
The Dark Lord, Cedric's death in 6th year, I thought it was all a nightmare. Now it's very much real. Please, take care of yourself. It's been hectic here in the Ministry. I've been drinking Pepper-Up potions every two days just to feel alive.
Please, please, please, I cannot stress this enough, take care of yourself.
I love you.
Yours,
Y/N, August 2, 1997.
***
George.
Please, let me join The Order. I know I can handle it. I want to, I need to, join the battle against Voldemort. Let me help.
He took away everything we've loved dearly. It's only a matter of time until he strikes all of us down.
Please, reply as soon as you can.
I love you dearly.
Yours,
Y/N, August 14, 1997.
***
George Weasley.
With your lack of response, I'm going to assume you're not letting me join The Order. Or are you dead?
For the love of Merlin, let me in. I need to know you're okay. I spent nights thinking of the worst possible scenarios; what if you've all been found by Voldemort? What if I never get to see you again?
Please, at least reply. Even one single word. Anything, just to know you're alive.
I know the Ministry's hot on Potter's tail right now, so if you ever read this, please send my regards to him. I've seen the way Fudge hides away in his office. The man's out of his mind, rambling about how Voldemort isn't back.
Diagon Alley shut down. Ollivander's gone. Your shop's... Seen better days.
Oh, how I wish to go back to halcyon days. Reply, please.
I love you.
Yours,
Y/N, August 29, 1997.
***
My dearest, George,
As soon as Errol came swooping by my window, I got up, drank my milk, and wrote to you.
I understand why you won't let me join, it's dangerous. I understand completely. But please, don't leave me in the dark. It's been two months since I last saw you, don't you think I at least deserve to know what's happening?
Merlin, you lost an ear. You're just like that Muggle painter, don't you know? I don't want to lose you spiralling in the raging sea of war.
It isn't easy for anyone right now, and I understand you're just trying to get by. Apropos of your nightmares, I'll send you Dreamless Sleep potions by Owl soon. I've brewed them a few months prior because I, too, have been plagued with nightmares.
The world's in a dark place right now. Please, take care of yourself.
I love you.
Yours,
Y/N, September 2, 1997.
***
Dearest George,
Amidst the never-ending darkness, I got myself a cat. She's a chubby ginger tabby cat, and in the envelope is a picture of us together. I've recently taken up Muggle photography to get my mind off things; though Muggle cameras aren't as capable as magical cameras, they have this certain charm to them. They remind me a lot of you, actually.
The cat's still unnamed, so I'm leaving the task of naming her to you.
How are the potions? Are they helping? You didn't mention them in your letter, so I thought to ask you.
I miss you, dearly. Come home soon.
Yours,
Y/N, October 14, 1997.
***
George.
Please, for the love of fuck, tell me you're alive.
News of Death Eater attacks are all over the Prophet. I'm still safe and sound, but where are you?
Word is going around in the Ministry that a second wizarding war may break out any time soon.
Please.
Please.
Please.
Write back.
Y/N, April 29, 1998.
***
George.
I'm fighting in the war.
Wait for me, my love.
Yours,
Y/N, May 2, 1998
***
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rannadylin · 1 month
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Pros of today's check-up with my endocrinologist: My A1C is down to 5.6* which is almost the lowest it's been!** And my CGM data says I've been 88% of the time in target range. :-) [insert "getting a good grade in being a type 1 diabetic" meme here...]
Cons of today's check-up: My endocrinologist is leaving to start her own private practice, which will be direct care and not take insurance so...I'm probably gonna have to start looking for a new one. :-( She's been such a huge help and so easy to work with that I kept driving an hour and a half to see her twice a year for check-ups even after I changed schools and moved to where I live now, so I don't look forward to trying to find someone who'll live up to my high expectations now. But c'est la vie, tempus fugit, and all that...
*I'm pretty sure it's the Ozempic. She started me on it at my check-up 6 months ago and I was looking back at my carbs/meds log from back then and almost immediately after I started on it my insulin ratios were dropping by about half of what I had to take before. She thinks that I have some type 2 diabetes/insulin resistance on top of the type 1/insulin dependent, and I guess the results probably prove her right here. I was taking insulin at a 1 per 3 carbs ratio back then and now it ranges as low as 1 per 6 or 7, which is great since the insurance company is apparently more willing to pay for Ozempic than they are for insulin (see last year's drama about the prior authorization for the insulin they told me I'd have to switch to...sigh).
**The prior lowest it's been was 5.5...in June 2020. After 3 months of reduced workload and not having to leave my home, meaning more control over my meals and rest and activity level and everything else. Hmmmmm funny how that happens. So I guess that getting it down to 5.6 now in the middle of a busy school year is an even huger win than I realized at first!
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arkhamknightz · 1 year
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DELICATE
summary: after an ongoing online scandal, you come out with a new album. during an interview, you talk about your inspo :)
warnings: this fic is an excuse to write this fic again that i made for joe since i wrote it months ago and for evan instead with reputation since i think its one of the best albums ever made! link to actual genius article for everyone :)
GENUIS!
“Three years after the release of their 2014 album, and following several public spats with celebrities, Y/N Y/L/N aims to clear their name and inaccurate public image on Reputation. At a fan event that took place in June 2018, Y/L/N described the record as a story of “finding love throughout all the noise,” referring to how the album transitions from discussing her persona to falling in love with American actor Evan Peters.”
*VIDEO STARTS*
“Is this thing on?” you looked at the camera crew and laughed as they held up a thumbs up. “Hi! Im Y/N Y/L/N, I’m here with Genius and I’m here to talk about my new album, reputation.” you smiled at the camera. Evan, sitting alongside the crew, read out the cards they had handed him. “So, how many tracks are on the album?” he asked. “Well, theres fifteen tracks” “Can you list them out for us?” he smiled warmly.
“The album starts off with Ready For It, End Game featuring Ed Sheeran and Future, I Did Something Bad, Don’t Blame Me, Delicate, Look What You Made Me Do, So It Goes, Gorgeous, King Of My Heart, Dancing With Our Hands Tied, Dress, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Call It What You Want, and the album ends with New Years Day.” Evan softly smiled, reading off the next card. “Is there anything you can tell us about each track?”
You laughed softly, “So, Ready for it is pretty much just diving into what the rest of the albums gonna be like, referencing past songs, kinda lightly digging into the whole situations thats been happening for a while.” you quickly moved onto the next track.
“End Game is just about my reputation and how this effected my outside relationships. I did something bad is pretty much about the same thing, but its a more direct approach.” You took a glance over at Evan, a small smile painted across his face as you carefully explained each track.
"Delicate is about my current relationship, as is Don't Blame Me, I'd definitely say it's one of my more vulnerable tracks." You smiled at Evan, who was already smiling as you started explaining. "My reputation wasn't the best when we first met, which obviously lead to me questioning a lot of it at the start. I didn't think someone could love me in the way he does after everything was going down, it felt like the whole internet was against me but he loved me for who I am and not who I was painted out to be."
As you finished going through each track Evan's smile only grew wider. "What's your favourite track off the album?" You clapped excitedly before speaking. "That's a really hard one but right now I'd have to say either New Year's Day or Dress, both songs are special in terms of relationships." "Do you have a favorite lyric from them?"
You nodded, "For Dress I'd have to say the bridge-" You watched as Evan looked down and smiled before looking back up at you. "Because it really touches on another vulnerable thought I had for a long time. He saw the best in me in my worst time. And for New Years Day probably the bridge as-well for the same reason.
Evan carried on the interview, you wandered questions about the album before closing off. "Well, I'm Y/N Y/L/N and this was my genius interview! Make sure to listen to Reputation on all platforms." You waved at the camera with a small smile on your face before they cut.
You stood up from your chair as the crew around you started speaking. You walked over to Evan who had put the cards down and opened his arms for you to walk into. You wrapped your arms around him as he gently kissed your forehead. "So I'm your muse hmm?" You let out a laugh and nodded before gently kissing him letting out a soft 'mmhm' You looked at him before slightly tearing up. "Thank you for loving me" He smiled softly before tightening his grip on your waist, "I'll love you for the rest of my life."
A/N: hi friends! I decided to finish this because after hearing delicate live and seeing this in my drafts I needed to finish this so badly.. live laugh love taylor swift!
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aroaceconfessions · 10 months
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Just a sad vent, I've been having depressive episodes over this very frequently over the past few months and i really need to say this somewhere… As a double demi (questioning asexual, am yet to find out for sure) dreaming about sweet romance and marriage, all that just seems so out of reach. Got ghosted a bit after i told a guy i was ace, possibly also because I was moving too slow for his liking, and before that it was months and months of mixed signals and intermittent ghosting from him and it hurts so much because he probably thought I just didn't like him since my personal issues and our faulty communication really stopped any forming connection in its tracks, and now it seems we're never gonna talk again. At this point I genuinely can't even imagine a loving relationship for myself - never been in one, can't imagine what kind of person I'd even be able to develop strong feelings for, and if I can't even wrap my head around any of that being a thing, it must really be impossible. It's sad that I'll never experience the relationship I dream of. And even though I see the appeal of sex with someone I love, I don't think I could ever feel comfortable around someone who wouldn't be fine with never having sex at all.. and I'm having trouble really seeing myself as a romantic entity nowadays, I don't think I'm someone anyone would like to be in a relationship that's not very (or at all) sexual, and I can't really appeal to anyone's aesthetic attraction either… I just wish I could be the best match for someone instead of a placeholder before a more suitable allo person comes along Sometimes I wonder if me not being demiromantic would make things easier for me :( I hate when someone interprets me going slow or being uncomfortable with anything sexual as me being uninterested in them... I really long to have a crush on someone, but even more so I long to be loved romantically for once
Submitted June 1, 2023
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romaine2424 · 10 months
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Daily Blog June 22, 2023
So that was fun yesterday in starting this blog. I seriously do hope that as time goes by that others will start doing the same. :) I do want to add that in my posts I will be adding some fandom history now and then. Today is one of those days. I may have been a bit self-indulgent. *blushes*
What I'm Reading:
I'm trying to savor the Ginny sorted into Slytherin story I mentioned yesterday. In my first read of it, I raced through it and know that I probably missed enjoying it in it's complete form. I'm on a few Discords and one of them being Harry Potter Fanfiction Club. They have a vote every month to choose what fics the members can read together and discuss. This month they chose for Drarry aideomai's Dwelling. I'd read this masterpiece before but decided to look for a shorter fic by this amazing author. I chose Nice Things. OMG all 22K of this fic is such a treat. If you ever need a warm, dreamylike fic, choose this one. It's an 8th year fic where only 7 of the classmates come back. Ron, Harry, and Hermione are in the mix. Draco is there along with Theo. They are assigned to live in a cottage on the grounds of Hogwarts. The progression of Harry and Draco's relationship is lovely. Read it now or Bookmark it for later when the need for this type of fic hits...as we all know there are times it's needed.
Tumblr Posts of Interest:
I only have one today and that's just because I have a bit to say about it as it holds a special place in my fandom heart.
HD Fan Fair (Career Fair) is open for prompts! They have openings for 250 prompts and so far have 153. Prompt closing is on June 30th. Claiming begins on July 1st.
First of all, I think we need to give a huge shout-out to Fan Fair mod @phoenixacid. This will be her 10th year of modding this fest. I do believe she worked on it even earlier. Anyone who's modded a fest before knows the dedication it takes to see it through. Her co-mod, @sassy-cissa has been involved since 2018.
Here's a little history about this Fest
This fest has been going on annually since 2009, with the exception of 2011. It was conceived by @marguerite26 and myself, with @vaysh11 and Jamie2109 soon joining in. I was unable to mod for personal reasons that first year and only partially the second...after that I pretty much left fandom. Back then, you really couldn't just start a fest when other established fests were already on the calendar. It was considered impolite and it would be posted on LJ about what an arse you were. LOL When hd_inspired closed shop, we jumped in and took their spot in Autumn. Fan Fair started with Career Fair and then moved on to Travel Fair. Since then, they've had Book (books mentioned in HP), Sex, Food, and Pottermore Fairs with repeats for Career, Travel and Food. Both Inspired and then Fan Fair were novel in being a prompt fest as opposed to an exchange fest like @hd-erised (back then it was hd_holidays). We felt it gave greater control to the authors to write to a prompt they liked as opposed to be assigned one, which from personal experience can cause angst and meltdowns. That is why it was called a Fair as opposed to a fest. A fest usually meant an Exchange Fest.
When I came back to fandom, I about cried seeing that @Phoenixacid had not only kept Fan Fair alive but it was thriving. I wrote for it that first year I came back in 2021, and I made a promise to read and comment on every fic and art piece posted for the Fairs. I only skipped one fic last year. It was brilliantly written but was beyond my comfort level for psychological horror. I don't listen to Podfics, I'm sorry to say. When I used to commute hours to and from work, I could but now I don't have the where-with-all to pay attention.
So go PROMPT!!!!! And give tons of love to the two mods!!!! Mods are the backbone of fandom.
For more history on Fan Fair and links to all the previous Fairs and their masterlists, here you go. Fan Fair on Fanlore.
Tumblr Drarry Fic/Art Resource:
Did you know the amazing @snowgall created and maintains a Drarry fanart archive at @snowingalway. She had noticed that fandom art of old was being lost and artists were leaving fandom. The pieces available for viewing are those that the artists have given her permission to archive. She personally contacted the artists to ask for such permission. I think when you visit the sight and view what she's saved, you too will be thrilled and indebted for what she's done for Drarry fandom. Please not she also posts and collect current works, too!
Last Tidbit:
I mentioned yesterday that I'd be reccing a fic today. I'm going to hold off on that until tomorrow. This is long enough. *blushes again*
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bettsfic · 1 year
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2023 WIP cleanout
a couple years ago i did a major WIP cleanout and it was very satisfying, and i've been bummed out lately so i'm doing it again to cheer myself up.
i have about 200k worth of unposted/unfinished fic, and i'd like to make a decent dent in that. when i listed out my WIPs i was surprised to find that most of them i'd written past the 50% mark and for whatever reason, the fic went an unanticipated direction. instead of fixing it, i moved on. the problem is that usually the unanticipated direction is something cool and that i want to pursue, but would make the fic longer and more complicated than i want it to be, and more work than i want to put into it. once i get enough distance from a fic, it's a lot easier to see how to get it back on track.
there are many things i set down and never think about again, but if it sticks in my head for longer than a couple months, then i know i need to come back to it eventually.
so this is my accountability thread! and i'm going to lay out the steps i took to triage these fics and get them posted, in case it helps anyone struggling with the same problem.
here are the things on my WIP cleanout list:
(Organic Chemistry isn't on this list because i'm actively working on it, albeit slowly)
Wind of the New World
Annie/Finnick, The Hunger Games (ASE epilogue)
started August 2020
this one is what inspired the cleanout, and as of yesterday it is DONE and POSTED. for the longest time it sat at about 7k when i knew it would be 10k, and i couldn't make myself write the last 3k because somehow it turned into a threesome fic with Gale and it took me a loooong time to let go of that idea. also, it required a lot of canon knowledge, which faded the longer i kept it on the backburner.
to finish it, i:
killed a few darlings (Finnick's crush on Gale)
down drafted the scenes i hadn't yet written
reread ASE while taking notes
rewatched Mockingjay 2 while taking notes
transcribed several scenes of Mockingjay 2
made a punch list of things i wanted to fix/rearrange/expand on
up drafted, dental drafted, and posted
completing it took about 15 hours across 3 days.
Stray
Lumine/Razor, Genshin Impact
started April 2021
this is an alternate beginning to genshin where the traveler finds Razor instead of Paimon. it stalled out at 5k because i wanted it to be rated M and i also wanted the characters to get all the way to Liyue, but both of those things were far more work than i wanted to put into it. so now it'll be rated G and end when they reach Mondstadt. i don't anticipate it will be more than 7k.
Before the Suns Rise
Anakin/Padme/Obi-Wan, Star Wars
started June 2022
this one is nearly 45k and about 95% done. i set it down because 1) i got to the threesome part and writing threesomes is hard, 2) i hadn't watched the Clone Wars or Rebels yet and so i was self-conscious about my knowledge of canon, and 3) i got distracted by Lemon.
another thing that a lot of these WIPs have in common is that they're very closely tied to canon and therefore have Plot and even though i can do Plot, i find it exhausting and a little tedious.
this is a post-Vader, alt-OWK timeline fic. in the 20+ star wars fics i've written, only 5 of them are in any way related to canon, and they're all one-shots. so this one is going to be hard.
i anticipate it'll only take 5k to finish, for a total of 50k and 14 chapters.
Patronage
Seungho/Nakyum, Painter of the Night
started October 2021
this is my Patreon AU that's over 10k already. in it, Seungho is married to Jihwa (and cheating on him with Nakyum) and i wanted to write the whole thing through to their divorce (and Seungho Getting A Real Job), but that is just. a lot. so i'm going to write only to Seungho finally giving in to his feelings for Nakyum, with the knowledge that after season 4 is finished, i may want to continue it as a series and write the latter half as i'd intended.
i'll probably only add 1-2k, for a total of 12k.
In Water Falling
Ahsoka/Rex, Star Wars
started November 2022
this was the first rexsoka fic i started working on when i finished Clone Wars. i got about 10k in, scrapped it, wrote another 15k, scrapped it, and then started focusing on Organic Chemistry. also, i just got very frustrated with it. to fix this one, i think i need to lower my expectations of it, rearrange some plot points, and write the final 2-3 scenes.
maybe 3-4k more? hopefully it'll cap out under 20k.
There & Here
Chishiya/OFC, Alice in Borderland
started February 2023
in my defense, i set this one down, like. a week ago. there's nothing i'm stalled out on; i just have to finish it.
currently 25k, hopefully only 5k more, capping out under 30k. it's 4 chapters.
things i intend to finish later:
Good Bones - this is my Emergency Fic that i'm saving for when i'm too blocked to write anything else
Bomb Time - this is a BOSAS fix-it. i definitely want to finish it, but i'm going to wait until the film comes out in November, so i don't have to reread the book to remember what's going on
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dribs-and-drabbles · 4 months
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15 people, 15 questions
Thanks for tagging me @colourme-feral, @wen-kexing-apologist and @thegalwhorants! I wrote this at night on Christmas Eve but then tumblr ate the post when I moved it from my drafts to my queue, so I had to write the whole thing again...
1. Are you named after anyone?
No. My parents had a difficult time deciding on a name and just eventually landed on the one they gave me.
2. When was the last time you cried?
Well that depends on what kind of crying... I teared up last Wednesday when my furniture and belongings arrived from being in storage for 17 months. Tears rolled down my cheeks and my breath hitched a few times when I watched ep 6 Last Twilight (damn you Aof!) nearly two weeks ago. But the last time I ugly sobbed was whilst watching a musical in June, but I was feeling especially emotional about my temporary living situation at the time.
3. Do you have kids?
No.
4. What sports do you play/have you played?
I don't play any now (but I do go to the gym) but when I was a kid I did gymnastics and then dance (although that's not a sport). I played different sports in school but only because I had to and they weren't any I really enjoyed.
5. Do you use sarcasm?
Sarcasm? Who, me?! Nooooooo never.
6. What's the first thing you notice about people?
Probably their posture or body language.
7. What's your eye colour?
To be honest I'm not sure. There's grey and bits of blue and green and even brown but I wouldn't be able to call it a colour. I used to say hazel but then I realised hazel was more brown than my eyes are so I don't really know.
8. Scary movies or happy endings?
Oh happy endings for sure. I mean, I'm on (this) tumblr because of the qls I watch so it should be obvious.
9. Any talents?
I can hold a handstand for 30 secs (I've also managed 1 min in the past but that was a while ago now) but that feels more like a party trick than a talent. I guess I could say dancing. Oh, maybe guessing the time usually quite accurately.
10. Where were you born?
In the UK, specifically England.
11. What are your hobbies?
Apart from going to the gym, handstanding and watching ql series? I'm currently obsessed with the clothes from the shows 😅...but I also like to go for walks, sometimes I play boardgames, and I like to read (I've been mainly reading fan fic recently though). I also think about lego a lot (and now I have my own place I might get some sets - bonsai tree my beloved) and I used to write but it's been a few years since I last wrote anything.
12. Do you have any pets?
No. I've had cats in the past and I'd like another cat at some point but not for a while.
13. How tall are you?
I'm not 🤭
14. What was your favourite subject in school?
I can't remember now but probably geography...but more geology than countries...or creative writing. There was a point where I enjoyed maths...but didn't study it beyond 16.
15. What is your dream job?
I'd actually like to be able to not work, or to only work part time. I've been lucky to have actually had my dream job and I'm very grateful for the opportunity/experience.
So that's it! I guess I should tag 15 people since that's the title of this game, so here goes: @grapejuicegay @telomeke (I know you've been tagged a few times) @respectthepetty (I know you've done it already but I wanted to tag you anyway) @celestial-sapphicss @dimplesandfierceeyes @chickenstrangers @wen-kexing-apologist (I know you've already done it as well but leaving this tag here anyway) @waitmyturtles @lurkingshan @my-rose-tinted-glasses @slayerkitty @ranchthoughts @belladonna-and-the-sweetpeas @btwinlines @starryalpacasstuff No pressure obviously. (bonus tag for @absolutebl because I like it when you answer these kinds of things using only photos /gifs)
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noirapocalypto · 10 months
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ᴛʜᴇɴ & ɴᴏᴡ - ꜱᴠʟᴇᴍ
I saw the trend floating around, and I wanted to participate. I want to talk a little bit more on just how important Salem has become to me. 🖤
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The picture on the left is one of the very first portraits of Salem I had taken. I think I had made him a bit earlier, but I officially introduced him to Tumblr on January 24th, 2022 (four days before his canon birthday, which funny enough, wasn't assigned until way after). And the portrait on the right is one of my more recent ones, that I've taken last month (June 19, 2023).
When I made him, he was just a side character. A little project that sparked when I discovered the genre of music I would eventually associate him and his character with. I wanted to create something that I thought was unique at the time. I wanted to do something different from the usual character tropes that I usually do. I didn't expect to fall deeply in love with his entire concept.
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(Left picture: taken September 9, 2022 - Right picture: taken June 22, 2023)
I've always defaulted to female characters in any type of game where I could create and customize my character. I just never questioned it and felt it was what I should do, but I never really connected with them. I'd play around for a while, then get bored and move onto the next OC. And so on.
Salem wasn't my first male character, he was actually the last of my main six. But for some reason, the moment I started writing through his eyes, it just felt right. That's when the questioning started. What did that mean for me? Why am I suddenly far more comfortable writing through the perspective of a male than any of my hundreds of female characters I've been writing for all these years? Why am I now suddenly wanting to default to playing male OC's? I began to explore things through him, things that I've come to find out I really enjoy and connect with. Things that make me happy and feel right. It was through Salem that I figured myself out a bit more, that I wasn't what I was told I was my whole life by people around me. I think that's one of the reason he's so special to me. I found myself through my character.
But not just that, I also found people that mean the world to me through Salem. My social circle expanded--I now had people that shared the same interests as me, that liked what I had to create, that encourage me and support me. People that I could be myself around. I met my best friend (hi, bestie 🖤) because of Salem, who at the same time, met his best friend in their OC, whom Salem loves as much as I love mine. I met friends from all over that I care for deeply and love very much--people I would have never met otherwise. That's one of the reasons this fandom is important to me and why I stick around, no matter how hard things get.
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(Left picture: taken September 9, 2022 - Right picture: taken July 11, 2023)
I know VP was never really my strong suit. A lot of my shots are very plain and simple, most of them are just portraits. In fact, I feel my style hasn't really changed much since my beginnings in this fandom. I'm never really going to be able to make all these elaborate set ups or be able to tell his story through virtual photography. My brain just doesn't work that way. I struggle a lot trying to improve and "catch up" with everyone else. And I'm growing to accept that. I think it's okay, that my talents and skills are stronger elsewhere. I just want to be able to capture him and share him with the rest of the world--to participate in the joy and camaraderie of loving the things we create so dearly.
While Salem isn't a self-insert, he does have a lot of me in him. Which I think is why I latched on so hard. He's all of my interests and beliefs personified. He's what I would like to be, how I would like to look. And he'll always be with me. Salem will forever be my main OC. Doesn't matter the fandom, if this one is still alive and kicking years from now--or if I've moved on to different media--Salem will always be my muse and he will always live on through my stories.
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sweaterkittensahoy · 3 months
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Our apartment is through a management company. It's usually fine. The last several months, we've had issues with them 1) actually sending out maintenance, and 2) not fixing our fucking floor.
Our floor was put in during the Fall of 2022 after the fucking flood of June 2022. For the entire summer, we walked around on the original concrete floor of our renovated 100-year-old basement apartment.
Management company swore the problem was that the property owner was dragging his feet.
I'd met the property owner several times as he'd come to inspect the damage and understand what he needed to do as owner, since it would be his insurance covering things. I thought he was an asshole.
The new floor went in. We moved home. A few weeks later, I noticed a space between the boards in the kitchen. I debated calling the management company, then went, "I'm in no fucking mood" and threw a rug over it.
I'm not a professional, but I know bits and pieces of home shit. I figured, with the weather cooling, the vinyl boards were shifting a bit, and it'd either stay the same or just slip back together at some point.
And then the rest of the floor started buckling.
I put a maintenance request in. A guy came out, took one look at the floor, and went, "Oh, yeah, I know what's happening." He took photos. He pushed back together what boards he could, and he left.
Nothing for about a week, then a call. The owner wants to come out and look. I sighed and agreed. He came out and brought along his wife, the maintenance guy who'd come before, and our property management contact.
He was NOT PLEASED. His wife's job that day, very obviously to me, was to get my real impression of the management company while the owner asked some questions about why it was taking a week to even update me on next steps?
I told the wife, "We've never had a real problem with maintenance. Stuff's always gotten fixed."
"Have you needed it often?" she asked.
"Nope," I said because it was true.
When the whole apartment was getting torn up after the flood, the demo guy was 1) great and 2) informed me that all the finishes in the apartment were commonly used but also the high-end version. Yeah, they were all particle board and vinyl and what have you. But they were the top-notch versions of everything. I remembered thinking, "Wow, the dude who renovated this place gave a real shit."
We have not heard word one from anyone at the management company about our floor since around October. We have heard from the owner and his wife on a few occasions, calling to see if the next step of the plans had happened. Which is how I found out there were plans. Our contact at the management company (with 16 years experience, something she mentioned when she sent out her intro email at her hiring) had not given me any information.
A couple of weeks ago, our kitchen turned into a tiny swamp. There was water coming up through the fucked up floorboards. A pipe had frozen upstairs a couple of days before. There were four inches of glaze ice over everything.
We called the management company. We got an email back: "We are confirming with the owner how he wants to proceed."
I started cursing the owner's name up and down.
And then he showed up that night. In the ice and the snow. With it pouring sleet (literally pouring sleet). I thought he was being a control freak.
He looked at things, said, "I'll have to turn the water off." And then went upstairs to check on things there. He came back a few minutes later, needing to try and find the shut off. We couldn't locate it down here, either. He shut it off at the street, then took Sean out and showed him how to use the tool to turn it on and off.
"It's a very slow leak," he told us. "If you don't mind mopping up water when it comes up, you can turn the water on for short periods of time."
Two days with no water. The ice continued not to melt. I fell on the dog walk and slid into the side of a car (nothing serious). The owner showed up again when the roads were still barely passable. He had the leak fixed and the water back in by the end of the day. He apologized for the delay. He left the wall open so things could dry, and came back the next day to check things again.
He started to grow on me. He knows his shit. He works quietly. He tries to be as unobtrusive as possible. I sent my regards to his wife, for which he thanked me.
During these few days, I'm getting sporadic emails from the management company basically rehashing everything that had happened that day. Even though I'd heard him call them and explain things to them within half an hour of showing up each day.
So, they were in the loop.
And, yes, so were we.
But there's a way to do these things.
And acting like it's all brand new information to you when the email gets to me at six, after he's left again after apologizing for getting some mud on the floor because he's been in and out not only fixing the leak but also beating the shit out of the four inches of glaze ice with a shovel so he can clear the sidewalk for us. Which is one of those technical requirements that I don't expect of any owner or management company when it's below freezing multiple days in a row in a city where that does not happen regularly. Like, the official city policy during the weather was "please stay the fuck inside."
The contractors came to put the wall back together. The owner showed up to properly introduce them, then left them to it. They did good work as far as I could tell.
I've heard nothing from the management company for several days, and I continue to be very unimpressed by their current actions. Which is just additional unimpressed feelings since October when I got a call from the wife saying, "Did the contractor come out to measure?"
"Measure?"
"For the replacement floor."
"No, Ma'am," I said, not knowing until this phone call that a contractor had even been signed. "Last I heard anything was when the inspector came out."
"Did the company contact you about them?"
"Yes, but then the inspector didn't show the day he was supposed to, and we didn't hear why. He did show up a couple of days later."
The kind of pause you only get from a woman who knows how to use her powers for politeness, smoothing ruffled feathers, and fucking murdering someone. "I see. Okay. Thank you."
"I've worked on a lot of floors," the contractor told me yesterday as he wiped down all the places drywall dust and paste had gotten (everywhere; including the bottom of Bean's foot I discovered this morning). "You're definitely gonna need new floor where the leak was."
"Oh, yeah," I said, with a wave. "We need the whole thing replaced, actually. It's in work."
"Yeah, I noticed it was bubbling," the contractor says. "Not surprising. This is the cheapest vinyl floor you can get."
"Oh?"
"Yeah. I've worked with the owner for years. I'm surprised he approved this."
About a week after the wife last called me, we got a letter in the mail from the owner. It read, in part:
...please copy us in all emails to the management company. We want to be fully aware when issues arise so they can be handled as quickly as possible...
Given all current evidence, I am beginning to suspect the problem was NOT the owner but the management company. As I have never worked in property management, I don't know who decides things like which flooring. However, having watched the owner over this last couple of weeks, I suspect the management company picked the flooring and the contractor to do it and the "dragging on" issue was the owner pushing for better quality.
I'm not sure. What I am sure of is that the owner was here today to paint the repaired wall and a strip of ceiling that has gone unfixed by the management company since before we told them the floor news.
I have been beyond happy with the speed of things with the owner in charge of repairs, and I've come to appreciate his dedication to keeping our place in good kit. He is proud of this place and wants it to show. He wants high-quality and good craftsmanship.
He also ended up not painting because the ceiling repair doesn't have the right texture when the lights are off. He is coming back tomorrow morning with the contractor so it gets done to his liking. "It can be difficult to match the texture of sheet rock," he told me. Having watched him work these past couple of weeks, I know he wants it done to a high standard that I appreciate as the tenant.
On the other hand. What an asshole.
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Round 2: Seventeenth story for @badthingshappenbingo ~
Title: A Piece Of Art
Fandom: Star Trek (AOS)
Character(s): Robert "Robbie" Scott, Khan Noonien Singh
Relationship(s): Robert "Robbie" Scott & Montgomery "Scotty" Scott (mentioned)
Rating: M
Words: 1,317
Prompt: Human Shield (used in a kinda abstract way?)
Warnings: Graphic Depiction Of Violence, Blood and Injury, Major Character Death, Disgusting Themes, Swearing, Kidnapping, Skinning, Psychopathology, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting
A/N: Based on my June of Doom story "You're doing great"
(You can also find this story on AO3)
~ A Piece Of Art ~
Robert "Robbie" Scott helplessly tried to pull at the restraints that were holding him down. He gritted his teeth in anger, twisting and turning his head as best he could, but found that it was of no use. He was tied to some sort of massage table, lying prone.
A muffled scream was all he was able to produce with a cloth gagging his mouth. Whoever had brought him to this place had definitely planned it.
He chuckled humorlessly. He knew exactly who had brought him to this place. It was the bastard who had kidnapped his brother. The reason why Robbie had come to the States in first place.
When the message about Montgomery Scott being missing had reached his family in Scotland, Robbie had known right away that he needed to get there. He needed to find out what had happened to his big brother.
So he had traveled overseas and within two weeks had gotten closer to an answer than the police ever had in a month.
The brilliant Scotsman had managed to follow every step his brother had taken before he had disappeared. He even had gotten access to some cameras the police had claimed to have been broken during the night of the kidnapping. It had been very hard to restore the 'deleted' footage, but Robert Scott was a damn good hacker.
And there he had seen him. The man his brother had run into on his way back home after work. The man his brother had chatted with for a moment before collapsing into his arms. The man who had 'helped' his brother into a nearby car, only to drive away moments later.
Robbie had thought about showing the footage to the local police, however, since he hadn't gotten the information the legal way, he had chosen to gather more proof first instead.
The Scotsman had thought about all the ways he knew to find someone.
The kidnapper had used a foil so that his license plate was unreadable for cameras.
He had also been smart enough to keep his face away from the cameras.
Robbie's only hope had been to trace the device the man had used to delete the security footage, but that hadn't worked either.
So instead, the Scotsman had focused on his brother's routine. He had visited all the places Monty used to go to.
His favorite café, the shipyard he worked at, the library he often visited, the pool.
And there Robbie had finally found him. The man he had seen in the video. The height, the dark hair, the car — there was no doubt.
Khan Singh, British physiotherapist.
He was the man who had kidnapped Montgomery Scott. And he was the same man who had taken Robbie now.
Tears of despair escaped the Scotsman's eyes as he once again failed to pull at his restraints. If only he had informed the police. If only he had been smarter. If only —
"Mr. Robert Scott."
The deep voice that suddenly echoed through the cold basement sent a shiver down Robbie's spine and he froze.
"My, my... what a pleasant surprise. I didn't think that I'd find another Scott."
The voice moved closer and closer and when Robbie managed to turn his head to the side, he met the handsome face of the bastard who had taken his brother.
"You are related to Montgomery Scott, aren't you? Judging by the appearance I'd say... his little brother?"
Robbie just glared at his counterpart, putting all the hate he felt into it. That man had no right to talk about his brother!
"Ah, I see. So I'm right about it. Now, what are you doing here? So far away from bonnie Scotland..."
Singh was mocking him! It was clear to tell! Robbie muttered some swear words into his gag and clenched his hands to fists.
"I suppose you wanted to search for your brother, huh? Well, I'm happy to be able to tell you, that you found him."
A frown crossed Robbie's face as he watched Singh get up from where he was kneeling next to the massage table and move out of his sight.
His heart started to race and various thoughts rushed through his mind, however, Robbie wasn't prepared for what happened next.
His kidnapper placed something right beneath the table's face hole and when Robbie looked through it, his stomach started to twist and turn.
A weak sob escaped his mouth and his eyes widened in disbelief.
There, right in front of his eyes, was a framed painting. Abstract lines in a dark red seemed to form what had to be a ship. At first, it looked like normal paint, but at a closer look, Robbie could tell the lines for the cuts they were. Cuts that had been carved into skin.
He wanted to throw up, but held it back, knowing that otherwise he might choke on it. Endless tears streamed down his cheeks, dropping onto the glass beneath him.
"Oh please. Don't cry. Your brother was the perfect canvas. This is one of my best pieces."
Singh's happy voice next to his ear disgusted Robbie even more and he moved his head away from the 'painting' to look at his brother's kidnapper... no... killer. The therapist was smiling at him.
That bastard had killed him! He had killed Monty!
Robbie screamed and sobbed into his gag, shaking his head vigorously.
"Now, let's see what we can do with your skin, huh? Right now I don't have space for a new piece of art since buyers are rare at the moment, but I'm sure we'll find something to create."
Slowly, Singh straightened his back and it didn't take long until Robbie felt his shirt being cut open, followed by cool fingers running up and down his bare back. The Scotsman winced at the touch, weeping quietly.
"Not as clean and perfect as your brother's, but it's something I guess."
For a long moment, Singh seemed to muse about what he should do and when he eventually made a determined and satisfied sound, Robbie squeezed his eyes shut in fear.
"Oh! Yes, that's good. You see, I have this wonderful friend. Her name is Kati."
The strong hands slapped the Scotsman's shoulder.
"She loves fantasy and medieval live action role-playing. Even though I see her more as a fairy, she prefers warrior characters. I'm sure she'd be happy about a new leather shield with handmade carvings for her birthday."
Robbie's breathing fastened and he shook his head in panic. His heart started to race as he yelled into his gag over and over again.
"I'm sure I can arrange something with that skin of yours."
A shield! That monster wanted to make a shield out of his skin!
No! Please! No! No!
Singh didn't seem to care. Instead Robbie heard him sit down on a wheel stool and roll over to the other side of the room.
"You should have stayed in Scotland, Mr. Scott. Well... at least you get to spend your last hours with your brother."
Robbie couldn't help but wince when loud classical music started to fill the room.
His eyes stayed focused on the painting as he felt the knife cut through his skin. With every line, his end was getting closer and closer and it hurt like hell, but when Singh eventually started to skin his whole back, Robbie didn't even make a sound.
He just stared at the ship. The ship that strangely enough represented his brother oh-so-well. The ship... Monty...
He only hoped that death had taken his brother quickly. For Monty hadn't deserved to leave the world in such a painful way. No one did.
And once again Robbie regretted that he hadn't told the police about his findings. For now it was too late. He'd end up as a piece of art. And no one could save him.
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therentyoupay · 1 year
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Hi, I was just wondering if technical difficulties is abandoned?
I hope you’re doing well!
*drops in after 5 years and 4 months with a technical difficulties chapter update*
*disappears*
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cover art made by @angel-gidget ♡
03/08/23. HELLO, HELLO, HELLO, ALL, LONG LONG LONG TIME, NO SEE. ♡ Can you believe it? When I first published this story (first to tumblr, then to ao3), I had just moved to Japan! When I posted ch. 7, I was still living in Japan, and would stay there for another 7ish months... and in the 5 years and 4 months since posting the last chapter, I have moved to three different cities in the United States and started a Ph.D. program. (I am currently halfway through my PhD program!!!!!) What a wild ride. Also, we lived through the pandemic?! And I bought a house! Over the summer! The market was vicious.
So, then how did I get the inspiration/time/energy/motivation to write Ch. 8, you ask? Marvelous question. I lied down in bed last night to go to sleep "early" and ended up reading an utterly hilarious play-by-play commentary on Bad Books, Good Times of a popular fantasy novel series—and I'm not quite sure what it was about "poorly written books explained by hilariously clever book lovers" but I suddenly had a craving for fanfiction, so I opened up my Books app on my phone, and my eyes fell upon a sudden recommendation for my downloaded copy of technical difficulties. And I thought, "Am I suddenly and weirdly in the mood to jot down some notes to start Ch. 7 right now? By golly, I think I am."
4.5 hours later, I'd written the whole damn thing from scratch on my phone in my Notes app. (Messily! Half-assed! But I wrote all of it down!) I then spent another 6.5 hours today filling in the gaps and "editing." This chapter (and the one that will follow it) has been in my head for more than half a decade, but I just haven't had the space to get it out until now!!
I think one of the most beautiful parts of getting a PhD is how completely it blows your perfectionism tendencies utterly to bits, and one of the really interesting byproducts that has come up in my acdemic writing is just how quickly I can crank out decent-enough writing (skill-building!!). In my case, I think so much of it has to do with just being able to word vomit fairly well while not trying to fix anything until the whole damn thing is basically done. So, I applied that knowledge here! Behold!
This isn't to say that I'll be writing the final chapter anytime soon—I may be on spring break right now and may have had a stroke of Writing Inspiration in the Wild™ last night, but I'm still finishing my last semester of classes and learning advanced Python and working on my milestone paper for my doctoral program and preparing to present at my next conference in June and preparing my proposal for my dissertation next fall. BUT! The important thing is that I will post the last chapter of this story (and all my other stories)! Eventually!! ;)
No BETA for this chapter because I gotta THROW this out onto the internet and get back to coding, so bear with! I may do minor edits for it in the near or distant future. Also, please note that I have not watched any episodes of Miraculous Ladybug after the finale of Season 1, so this fic is very much a ~time capsule~ from the past. If there is any additional lore that might otherwise apply to the plot of this fic, please know that I don't know about it, and I am keeping myself selectively ignorant on all matters of Miraculous Ladybug season 2 and beyond until after I finish this story the way I originally intended. ♡ Woo!
as for, tumblr, sadly, to be honest, I'm never really online anymore! I'll respond to comments here on ao3 ASAP, though. ♡ LOVE YOU ALL, THANK YOU. ♡♡♡
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transitofmercury · 4 months
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Pulitzer Family Fact Post (Katherine's Siblings Edition)
I'm finally doing it, after threeish years, I'm finally making posts about my acquired knowledge of the Pulitzer family. I'm starting with what I know about his kids because I think that's what people would find most interesting. I'd quite like to go on about Pulitzer's siblings and what people have managed to figure out about his childhood but I'll do that another day. It's been a while so I might forget stuff or get things slightly wrong but I'm doing my best to be accurate. Information is mostly from James McGrath Morris' book, 'Pulitzer: A life in Politics, Print and Power' and records I looked at on Ancestry (I got really weird about this).
Pulitzer and his wife, Kate Davis, had 7 children: Ralph, Lucille, Katherine, Joseph, Edith, Constance and Herbert. I'm just going to go through kid-by-kid and reel off everything I remember that is actually semi-interesting.
Ralph Pulitzer: Born June 11th, 1879. Died June 14th, 1939. He was born in St. Louis because Pulitzer hadn't bought The New York World and moved the family to New York at this point.
All the kids seem to have been sickly (like their father) but Ralph was asthmatic and small for his age, his health was always a concern. The family would spend a lot of time in Europe but he and Lucille were the ones who usually joined their parents while the younger ones were left in America. He didn't like learning Latin (From a letter to Lucille: "I never imagined a language capable of such filthy, beastly rules and contradictions") and preferred Greek. He was educated at St. Mark's School and would've been at Harvard by the time that Newsies happened.
All the sons were a bit detached from the realities of how newspapers worked because they were raised in mansions and boarding schools but Pulitzer was surprised and very upset about them having limited journalistic skills. He really wanted them to be prepared to run the paper after him and they really weren't. He started to become president of The World around 1907. When Pulitzer died, he got 20% of the newspaper stock in the will. He was the main person running The World before they sold it in 1931. Ralph preferred high society life to newspapers. He married Frederica Webb who was vaguely a Vanderbilt in 1905. They had two sons, I think, and eventually divorced. He remarried and had two daughters but one died very young. He died in New York following complications to do with abdominal surgery.
Lucille Irma Pulitzer: Born September 30th, 1880. Died December 31st, 1897. She was probably also born in St. Louis but I haven't been able to find the record. Her middle name seems to come from one of Pulitzer's sisters.
She was Pulitzer's favourite, that's the key thing about her. He had very high expectations of his children and a lot of rules, and she managed to meet those expectations and didn't break those rules. She was focused on her studies, she could speak multiple languages and play multiple instruments. In Pulitzer's code-book, she's referred to as 'Lulu' instead of Lucille. Seems to have spent a lot of her younger years in Europe. When she was 14 she had a minor throat surgery and Pulitzer got upset that everyone was paying her more attention than they were him (his wife got really mad at him and he sent Lucille flowers to apologise).
I think I read about her graduating from Miss Brown's School for Young Ladies in May 1897 when she would've been 16. Summer of that year they held a party at the Chatwold (their place in Bar Harbour) to basically debut her. A couple days later, she became ill. She had Typhoid and despite the family's efforts, she died months later at the Chatwold on New Years Eve. After her death, Pulitzer established the Lucille Pulitzer Scholarship at Barnard College, which makes me think she wanted to go to college and that he would have supported this.
Katherine Ethel Pulitzer: Born January 30th, 1882. Died May 9th, 1884. Same as Lucille, probably born in St. Louis but I've never seen the records. She's the one daughter whose middle name I can't link to one of Pulitzer's family members but her first name comes from her mother. There's not much to say because she died so young. She died of Pneumonia in New York almost a year exactly (one day off) after Pulitzer purchased The World.
This is quite sad (it's already sad) but she is either omitted or forgotten in the 1900 census. They asked for the number of children born and the number of children living, at this point all 7 had been born and 5 were alive but the Pulitzers responded that 6 had been born instead. They weren't forgetting Lucille after three years, so it seems like Katherine was not counted.
Joseph Pulitzer II: Born March 21st, 1885. Died March 30th, 1955. One of the few children born in New York.
Less sickly than the others but Pulitzer was constantly disappointed by him. He was also sent to St. Mark's School. As a teenager he didn't do what his father told him to and didn't pay enough attention to his studies. He got thrown out of St. Mark's in 1901 after he and some friends snuck out to buy beer and then ended up climbing into the headmaster and his wife's bedroom when they were sneaking back in. Pulitzer was really angry about that. Pulitzer managed to get him into Harvard but he just kept being the same as he was before so Pulitzer pulled him out of Harvard.
He got sent to St. Louis to be trained by the people Pulitzer had at the Post-Dispatch and actually developed journalistic talent. His father could not see this talent and was still disappointed in him. He only got 10% of the newspaper stock when his dad died. He ran the Post-Dispatch far better than his brothers ran The World. He tried to punch Hearst which is just really funny to me. He married Elinor Wickham in 1910, she died in 1925 and a year later he married Elizabeth Edgar. He had similar health problems to his father towards the end of his life and after he died, the Post-Dispatch passed to his son, Joseph Pulitzer III, it stayed in the family's hands until very recently (either the 90s or the 00s) but there was a legal battle about whether to sell it in the 80s.
Edith Louise Pulitzer: Born June 19th, 1886. Died April 6th, 1975. She was born in Lenox, Massachusetts. Her middle name seems to come from Pulitzer's mother.
Pulitzer was not that interested in his younger daughters but he still had high expectations for them. When she was younger and her parents travelled to Europe, she seems to have been left in America more than her older siblings but later on she seems to have been just following her mother around to wherever she went. She was 13 when the Pulitzer house fire happened in January 1900. Morris mentions an incident where she got upset at her father for constantly criticising her and the two of them had a bit of an argument. She was sent to Miss Vinton’s School for Girls in Connecticut.
She married William Scoville Moore a couple weeks after her father died, I think I read that they had to have a pretty boring, scaled back wedding because, officially, she and her mother were still in mourning. They had five sons. William died in 1944 and then two of their sons died in 1944 and 1945 fighting in the war. Another son died in 1957. She lived the longest out of all of the children, and 1975 feels so strangely recent for a child of Joseph Pulitzer to have been alive then. She and Constance both got the same amount in the will and it was obviously a lot of stuff but I think she might've tried to claim that it wasn't enough and that her father wasn't in his right mind when he made the will.
Constance Helen Pulitzer: Born December 13th, 1888. Died July 14th, 1938. She was born in France, probably Paris, because the family (Joseph, his wife and the eldest two children) were in Europe looking for advice on his worsening health when she was born. According to census responses from the early 20th century, her first language was French while all her siblings' had been English. Her middle name seems to come from another one of Pulitzer's sisters.
Pulitzer did not see her for very extended periods of time in her early childhood. She was also at home when the Pulitzer house fire happened, she was 11 at the time. Once, when Pulitzer was away from home, he only received a letter from Constance and told his wife to tell the other children he didn't love them (that's a quote, "To all the rest of the children you can say I do not love them"). She also followed her mother around Europe a bit when she got older. She debuted in 1907.
In 1913 she married William Grey Elmslie who had been her younger brother's tutor. The family expressed their support for the marriage but I think only Edith was actually present. Oh, this is Newsies relevant: she and Edith shared a property in Santa Fe. She died at 49 which is young even by Pulitzer family standards and makes her the first child to die in adulthood but I can't find a cause of death so I don't know what went on there.
Herbert Pulitzer: Born November 20th, 1896. Died September 4th, 1957. He was born in New York. I see him get called Tony a lot, he might've had a middle name that gets forgotten.
This is a twist you're not expecting: he may have not actually been Pulitzer's son. There's (significant) evidence that Kate was having an affair with Arthur Brisbane when she got pregnant with Herbert and it's definitely possible that Arthur was Herbert's father. He was born a long time after Constance considering that the first 6 children were born within 10 years of each other. And if you look at pictures of Pulitzer and his older sons at around the same age, they look very similar - I don't think Herbert looked that much like him but he does kinda look like Arthur. We can't really know but I do think it's very, very possible. Pulitzer never doubted that Herbert was his, and he seems to have been the favourite of his sons since he got 60% of the newspaper stock. He briefly ran The World in the years before it was sold but apparently people who worked there didn't like him. He was very young when the Pulitzer house fire happened and Kate had to go back inside to save him.
I'm less certain about details in Herbert's life than the other children, I'm not sure why I know less about him but I do. He was the only child at his father's deathbed, when he was only a teenager. He learnt to fly and fought at the end of WW1. Married Gladys Munn in 1926 and they had two children together. Their son, also called Herbert, led a messy life (highly publicised divorce). Herbert died of uremic poisoning, which is described "urine in the blood" and, yeah, that's the note this post is going out on.
Again, it's possible I've made mistakes or forgotten stuff here. I also can't stress enough how much information James McGrath Morris' book has provided this post.
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