#I’d literally kill for them

[erereretrunkle]

Mhm gay

Nightmear belongs to Jokublog

Killer belongs to RahafWabas

#gay #sans au #undertale au #nightmare sans #killer sans #nightkiller #fuck i love them #HRGHRGRHRGRGRHRGRGRHRGRGRHRGGRHRGRHRJGRJRGRJGRJRGHR #NO ONE CAN CONTSIN MEEEEEEE GRHRGRGRGRHRRRSHHHHHHHHHHH #IM COMIGN OUTMIF YM CAGEGGEGEGEGEEEEEE #GRHRGRGHRGRGRHRHRGRGGRHRGRRGRGGRGR AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH #IM SO GAY IM SO GAY IM SO GAY IM SO GAY THIS 2024 #I’d literally kill for them #this is literally the only thing that I’d throw myself off a plane for and roll down a hill and land into an ocean with piranhas #so they chew on my bones and then spit me out so I fall down another hill and into a volcano only to be exploded back into the air and be #consumed by seagulls at a local Walmart

[stuckinapril]

me stoically navigating my way through drama bc bigger things are ahead and it’s not my fault people are dumb

#kissed a guy at a kickback and thought we caught a vibe only to find out he just wants to fuck me. next #friend’s bf of 7 years drunkenly hit on me at the same kickback (I was not ok w this). they ended up beefing over me. he denied everything. #do I want to be involved in this? no. and so I simply ignore it and keep it pushing #and the guy I kissed is cancelled. like he is dead to me. so that’s also taken care of #it’s back to studying full-time for the mcat #going to the gym/taking walks daily #volunteering at the refugee center + clinic #getting published in orgo research papers #and trying to snag the opportunity to shadow doctors at a massive cancer research center. like I’d kill for it #december was such a mess but I’ve finally made peace w the fact that most of the stuff that happened I couldn’t prevent #but I’ve mourned it enough !! whatever drama comes out of it I’ll handle just fine #i literally want to be a multitasking academic weapon everyone is intimidated of this year #i am not letting something as puny as a dumb man (both of them btw) stop me. goodbye #also everyone involved is older than me (they’re both 23) but it all just feels like such high school behavior #this is not a euphoria episode like I’m literally just not entertaining any of this #had to get this off my chest. i feel better #p

[bowandbrush]

I walked into Goodwill.

walked out with a pair of genuine Sai

#SO #I was with my mom shopping at goodwill #I’m basically there for emotional support #And #we mostly look at books and CDs #And I’m walking past a shelf #And I’m like #YOOOO #I run up to the sai sitting hooked on the shelf and eagerly picked them out #And to my even bigger surprise #These guys are HEFTY #AND REAL #And I start freaking out and stuttering trying to show my mother #I literally got so hyped that I started drooling #No joke #and my mom looks at me with huge metal things in my hands and is like #??? #and I start yapping #And I put them in the cart after infodumping about these things #And there’s an older couple standing close to me #Giving me a dirty look #I guess they were also looking at them #But they didn’t make any moves sooo #Like I got them first #But they FOLLOWED US #Kind of #i was being paranoid #But if looks could kill #I’d be dead #Also I hate eye contact and these folks out here like a Wild West film

[kinokoshoujoart]

scribbles based on my Another Wonderful Life file where i discovered Rock and Nami showing up together at Vesta’s farmhouse late at night on multiple occasions to cause various types of chaos and disturbance and havoc until Marlin and Vesta’s bedtime (which they both announce in unison to kick everyone out) this included

Rock levitating and attempting to rizz up vesta

Nami making a beeline for Celia’s room where she stands around making very subtle remarks (celia isn’t even in her room)

Marlin Enduring

haunting crime scene photos of the shenanigans:

#bokumono #my art #harvest moon #rock tumbling (sos) #hm anwl #harvest moon a wonderful life #hm awl #story of seasons #harvest moon another wonderful life #rock (awl) #cora clownposting content #nami (awl) #marlin (awl) #awl pony #sos awl #story of seasons a wonderful life #hmanwl #for some reason i’m very amused when people visit each other in awl #levitating rock reminded me of mystery of the druids somehow. hence lowryposing #marlin is halligan coded. to me #rock and marlin were both on the murders squad when they lived in the city and fought for dominance over the pair of scissors #(the scissors don’t belong to either of them) #marlin’s myriad health issues come from his diet of pitza and cigarettes and straight medical alcohol #also the last picture is inspired by a very suspicious line vesta says in response to seeing the milker #which somehow sounds worse in japanese because of the phrasing #instead of ‘planning to milk me?’ she’s like ‘are you trying to squeeze mine?’ #anyway. rock would take her ‘i’d like to see you try!’ literally and then get killed i think #i’m sorry (not sorry enough) #after analyzing everyone’s dialogue very scientifically i once again feel that the girls anwl lines have 1000% more bittersweet yearning #(no bias in analysis at all) i can’t explain it their lines obviously were targeted at me to make me long for them

[buddiesmutslut]

One thing I hate so much about 911 is the LACK OF APOLOGIES.

Bobby shoves Buck against the wall in s1 & it’s written off as acceptable bc Buck is being nosy, like being annoying is a good excuse to put your hands on an employee.

Buck apologized for the lawsuit & not being around in s3, but Bobby never apologized for holding him back (& lying about it) & Eddie never apologized for screaming at him in the grocery store.

Chim assaulted Buck in his apartment before going after Maddie, and it was never addressed. (Also, does anyone remember if Chim apologized for keeping the Daniel secret from Buck but not the bomber in that one episode? I genuinely can’t remember, I haven’t watched the first seasons in like, a year.)

Also, does Maddie ever apologize for telling their parents about Buck being in therapy? I know they fought about it, but it was also tied in with the Daniel secret (which was fucked but they talked about that) and I can’t remember, but that was kind of shitty, too.

Buck maybe purposefully gets rough with Eddie and definitely hurts his ankle during the game. Sure, we see him feeling bad about it & Maddie scolding him, but no actual apology to his best friend, not even a mention of one.

Those are just the ones I can think of off the top of my head, & idk man, people are flawed, and I know that these characters aren’t perfect, but part of that is apologizing & making amends when you’re wrong. So much stuff is just glanced over to keep the story moving, and I get it but I’m not a huge fan of it. They all have this great, family bond, but how sustainable is that when you’re not owning up to your mistakes and making it right when you hurt someone?

#911 abc #evan buckley #911 spoilers #eddie diaz #howard chimney han #bobby nash #i have a lot of thoughts #if I was in charge I’d lock everyone in a room & make them say sorry #oliver stark #ryan guzman #peter krause #kenneth choi #jennifer love hewitt #we’re all going to sit in a circle and apologize for the way we hurt each other #the fact that we got Buckley AND Diaz parent apologies before we got apologies for the lawsuit is UNREAL #Honestly that punch from Chim & the way it was handled kind of turned me off his character #like he’s literally in love with a woman that survived an abusive relationship who ended up killing her husband in self defense #and then her next partner punches her brother in his own home bc she spoke to him? & we just go on with our day to day lives???? idfw that #Chim is cool & funny but I hate the writers for that #honestly I could sit here & pick apart each of these occurrences for days so I’m just going to shut up now lol

[pebblezone]

#hellsing #hellsing ultimate #seras victoria #alucard hellsing #walter c dornez #a #those like 2 seconds of dialogue between Walter and seras hands down best scene like DUUUUUUDE #*seras interacts with literally any character* ‘omg they have the best dynamic in all of hellsing’ #I LOVE HER SO MUCH AHHHGHHGGH every dynamic is great because she at her core is such a loving and passionate person that it bleeds into all #other facets of her life like FUCK man even after the betrayal she thanks Walter like she’s been through hell and seen the worst in people #yet she still sees the good in them!!!!!! what the fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #unrelated but currently very emotional about my 3ds and Pokemon and the beauty of existing authentically #I found my first (caught) shinies!!!!! I found a rattata when I first got heartgold and my brother tried to coach me through but I killed it #so then I’d been playing b2 and was in the ranch and I got this patrat and azuril within 30 minutes of each other #and then seeing other Pokémon that I transferred up or that I got from my brother and the ones my friend traded me #and then like my 3ds is a Time Capsule to 2015 when I figured out I can use the internet on this thing #girlie was on ao3 and I’ll keep some of my dignity but it’s endearing in a sort of way. that was my life once! #people and the passage of time is so sexy. being able to grow and see yourself change as a person. Pokemon. #I got like this a few months ago going through the camera on my 3ds. I have like no photos of me from 8-12so it’s like. woah!! that’s me!!!

[rotzaprachim]

idk this is a discussion for Jews (and other marginalized people) but I’ve always felt really iced out of or even disturbed by people esp goyim casually stating support for Jews “killing our oppressors” as the Solution for all our problems when the reality is that antisemites outnumber Jews by such incredible numbers that the result would be incredible carnage and also it’s all a sign of how little goyim really reckon with antisemitism as a widespread and potent modern force.

Furthermore while I am in no way here wishing to describe Palestinians as our oppressors, the idea that what an oppressed group actually needs to be safe is just violence and to be armed- to be Jews with guns, Jews who can fight Back, Jews Tough Enough to respond to what happened to Us- is a huge aspect of the modern ideology that keeps justifying anti Palestinian violence as well as the Zionist “new Jew.” Like the reality here is there’s no way out without asking Jews to profoundly disarm themselves and reevaluate our relationship with militarism, lay down the arms, and that fits uncomfortably with the global reality of antisemitism- also begging the question, why do discussions center the Jews’ culpability for turning towards armed nation state based solutions rather than the world’s culpability for making a profoundly non violent people kneel at the hour or organized militaries and mandated conscription as the only means of safety. The answers to these questions lie at complex junctures of Israeli demilitarization and disarmament and return of land and nation but also global culpabilities to create a world in which Jews don’t need to be Jews with Guns to live but either way it strays so far from either Christian centrist rhetoric of turning the cheek and tumblr cultural Christian rhetoric of maybe if we just killed the right people everything would be fine and the route to Justice of all oppressed peoples is violence (regardless of what happens when multiple oppressed peoples have been turned against each other, as imperialism loves to make happen)

#Personal #ish? #I need a way to tag this #But yeah like our deassimilation from militarism here grr chomp hiss #I get extreme whiplash every day from the things goyim think Jews should or shouldn’t do #No I don’t want my oppressors dead do you REALISE how many more of them there are than me? #This is literally not a luxury that has ever been extended to me and I’d enjoy the vaguely fascist worldview that makes #Justice as simple as our oppressors - the Bad people- being killed so the Good can live #Unfortunately that logic is literally what the worst actors in this current conflict preach so idk/

[betterthanbatman1]

bman and jason have a seriously strained relationship as is, and our braindead coma patients at DC have no interest in fixing it because Drama Sells, so what do you think would genuinely help these two get back to something real?

Ooh, great question, Anon! Thank you :)

So, right if the bat (pun intended) we know that Bruce and Jason don’t get along well, specifically because of their dissimilar morals.

In DC comics, Bruce only sees in a black or white, this or that way of thinking. It’s either ‘continue to fight crime and leave the rest to the justice system’ OR ‘focus on controlling crime and killing criminals to protect others’. Jason on the other hand sees both of these as opposing morals, and he also recognizes that there is a middle ground which is ‘get rid of the absolute worst of them’. Because Jason understands Bruce, he knows that nothing will make Bruce take a life or do things differently (I mean, his own death didn’t make a difference to Bruce’s morals), but Jason also believes that Bruce doesn’t have to change who he is, he just needs to accept that Jason’s methods are right for Gotham. Ultimately Bruce killing Joker for Jason would have helped their relationship, because Jason would have known that he was loved and his life was worth more than the clown’s. And in UTRH Jason says “I’m not talking about cobblepot or riddler or Dent… I’m talking about him, just him” Bare with me, I know that Jason says this regarding Bruce killing Joker for a different reason being -Joker’s crime was a lot more personal. However I still feel like regardless if Joker hadn’t killed Jason, Jason would still feel the same way about Joker- meaning he’d still think Joker deserves to die because of the sheer brutality and sadism and absolute power the clown has on Gotham & it’s people. (More than any other Gotham city rogues!)

So back to the point, if Bruce acknowledged (like Jason does!) the middle ground of killing the worst of the worst, then that would bring the two closer together.

Listen, I get that Bruce killing would forever change ‘The Batman’, but Bruce doesn’t have to kill people to accept the ideology because he knows Jason is right, he knows crime is down because of Jason. But NO!, DC has to make him beat the shit out of his son instead of having a fucking conversation.

Which brings me to this point. For some reason DC seems to think that these two have to fight no matter what. If they went to have soup with Alfred they’d still end up punching each other for whatever reason. It’s ridiculous. Is this what they think readers want? I completely agree with you, Anon. Drama sells, unfortunately.

The next point is that Bruce needs to actually have faith in his son because guess what?, Jason needs his father’s support to do good. Actual good. Bruce second guessing Jason and not trusting him with missions is exactly what gets Jason frustrated, causing him to feel inferior, worthless, or unlovable in Bruce’s eyes. From a psychological perspective, if Bruce trusted Jason and told him he trusted him, Jason would feel so much better about himself and their relationship. It’s so much better for a child to prove their parents are right for trusting them (motivating them positively) than having a child strive to prove their parents wrong (motivating them negatively). Bruce needs to stop being so condescending and Jason will finally feel heard. Bruce treats him like a child which is just so wrong and demeaning.

Last point is that Bruce needs to spend more time with Jason as Bruce and not as Batman. Sometimes Jason needs his father and that’s okay. It’s up to Bruce to be there for him. Whether Jason is an adult or not, he should be able to feel like he can call or visit or ask for help from Bruce without Bruce getting angry or telling him he’s off the mission.

At this point DC just needs to get the whole family seeing some therapists.

In conclusion, things that would help mend Bruce and Jason’s relationship:

Finding a common middle ground among their morals

Bruce should not beat his sons regardless if they are ‘criminals’ in his eyes or not

Bruce killing the Joker (this would bring Jason closer to Bruce, but it does cause some changes in Bruce’s character).

COMMUNICATION (this is the first step in therapy probably)

Having them be partners and act like partners. Bruce needs to get off his high horse and stop being so condescending to Jason.

Similar to the above-Bruce needs to trust Jason and make sure Jason knows Bruce trusts him.

Spend more time outside of crime fighting. Idk go watch a baseball game or go fishing. Have some family dinners and talk about the times when things were easy and fun and silly, before everything went to shit. Jason deserves his dad and Bruce deserves his son.

Therapy (The whole family would benefit).

#Thank you for the ask :) #I love this ask so much #My brain literally just switched all of my senses off and I wrote this as fast as I could type #Absolutely love being able to turn off the world and hyper focus on bat stuff #bruce wayne is a good dad #Unless he’s written by DC #DC thinks we want the pure masculine energy of a man beating another man who is his son who is also a villain #I have to say though: #As much as I’d love Bruce and Jason to have a better relationship #I also don’t trust fanon to write them #it’s either Bruce beating Jason in DC or Bruce and Jason falling asleep crying and hugging each other in fanon #I just want a middle ground where they still love each other but also act like how a fathers’ and sons’ relationship would be #DC I just want them to have at least a semi functional relationship I’m not asking for them to read books before bed every night- #it shouldn’t be that hard!! #I’m going to make a post about Bruce killing Joker and how that would affect them/their relationship #don’t tag as ship 🔪 #jason todd #Batdad #red hood #batfamily #batman #bruce wayne #batfam #dc #dc comics #character analysis #asks #feel free to ask! #I spend too much time in the tags smh #Red rambles

[quietwingsinthesky]

oh, yeah, another thing i noticed that was odd about s5 in comparison to earlier seasons was how much they relied on like. not the history of the doctor, exactly, but the image of that history. whether from little easter eggs of the first doctor’s picture popping up everywhere to i think the two(?) times in the season we get a montage of past doctors. and i honestly can’t remember anything like that happening earlier (with the exception of the time crash short, which felt more substantial to me and was also like. 7 straight minutes of david tennant being allowed to fangirl.)

and i say ‘the image’ because hell knows the RTD era was pulling from doctor who past left, right, and center, but it rarely felt like a moment of ‘look at this old thing, you remember old thing? old thing was cool and so are we for continuing it.’ and more like ‘here’s a species/character/etc from classic who. and here’s how they’ve changed and fit into the new world we’ve built for the show.’

I guess, the difference here for me is that. i haven’t watched classic who. s5 shows me a slideshow of doctors and to me, those are the guys i once ranked by how sexy i think they are. and not much else. i don’t have an emotional connection to an image. but take, say, school reunion? an episode that was my favorite even back when i was a kid specifically because i adored sarah jane? i had no idea who she was then, i only just figured out a little bit ago which doctor she traveled with, and exclusively all i’ve watched of her is that episode in s2 and the sarah jane adventures. and yet, that episode, without the context there for me, managed to make sense to me. i’m sure it was probably even more impactful to fans of sarah jane from classic who, but it didn’t lose its impact without that knowledge.

so, that’s a shift. i don’t want to say it’s a negative one, exactly, because maybe people who have seen classic who like these references and i’m missing something. but, to me, it feels a little more shallow.

#sorry if i kept talking about sarah jane and school reunion we’d be here all day. her reintroduction to nuwho is phenomenal. #even without classic who. you get it. you get what the doctor did to her. you understand how much it hurt her. by giving her time with rose #we’re able to use what we know about rose to parallel her with sarah jane and infer that sarah jane was a lot like her once. it’s good! #and seeing pictures of the first doctor is like. very funny because he’s a silly little guy. but i don’t know that man. #but yeah. another example i’d put out there is Dalek. and yes everyone loves dalek we all know its good. but. without the context of classic #who. this was the choice of how to reintroduce the daleks to the audience. not as silly tin can killing machine. but as this. this wretched #and pitiable thing that dies to see the sunlight. this monster that is. in its last moments. capable of change. however small. #(a theme that i think links up well to evolution of the daleks in s3. i think its interesting how we’re invited to see the daleks first as #beings that have had a great and terrible injustice done to them. (in episode: the dalek being chained up and tortured. in a wider context: #how daleks are made at all.) before we’re introduced to them as a galaxy-wide threat intent on inflicting that same suffering on the rest of #the universe.) #MY POINT IS: nuwho and classic who mix well when the classic who elements are reintroduced in a way that makes sense both for people with #the back knowledge of classic who (and maybe they get even more out of it) while ALSO makign sense to people who’ve only seen nuwho. #anyway. this is a small thing its far from like. a show-ruining point. its literally fine lol. #doctor who #dw lb

[lordofthemushrooms]

Anyone else have lots and lots of fun thinking about a Solas romancing Inky who ends up pregnant right before he leaves her and she never got the chance to tell him. And for a while there is so much love there still because she is carrying his child and even if he’s gone she still feels as if part of him is with her. But it goes on and on without him and all the love starts to boil into resentment and hatred for being left completely alone,weak and vulnerable.

Do you think about said Inky, confronting Solas in Trespasser trying so hard to keep down that hate (and the scary bit of love that creeps back in the moment she hears his voice again) because she doesn’t want him to know about their child. Being vindicated in the hate she feels because not only did he leave her but he lied to her.

Do you think about how horrifying it would be for her to realize also, that now that she has even more reasons than before to wish him dead, that this confrontation, this betrayal, this painfully calm fight, is the first time she’s felt her love for him return.

Does anyone else think about that or…hell o hello can anyone here me

#solavellan #solavellen hell #solas x lavellan #my inquisitor #dragon age inquisition #solasmance #this is quite literally just the spark notes on the situation for my Inky but I’d be her for literal hours typing if I was specific #also don’t think about her screaming at Solas that he has a child in a moment of weakness and Solas drooping his calm facad for a moment #I think there is room to see it as a soft moment but it is soooo much more fun to think about him grabbing her by the wrists #and almost yelling at her how dare you never tell me #but she couldn’t she couldn’t she couldn’t #anyway I think they are still so deeply and viscerally in love with each other that it’s killing them both #inquisitor oc #inquisitor rani #dragon age

[donnatroyyyy]

Batman has/had some kind of miscommunication going on with every single one of his kids. The bat family is just one big miscommunication trope after the other.

#him and Dick have miscommunication about how they see each other. Bruce sees Dick as a son and Dick sees Bruce as a father #but they didn’t think the other saw them that way so they never told each other. that’s what led to their fights in Dick’s later teenage #years and dick quitting and becoming nightwing. he thought Bruce only saw him as a ward/robin so he thought that as long as he couldn’t be #robin Bruce wouldn’t want him #and if didn’t help when Bruce stopped talking to him when he left. though to Bruce it was because he thought Dick didn’t want to talk to him #and also Dick really needs to tell Bruce like ‘hey you put me on a higher pedestal then you put even yourself which is saying something and #and I don’t like that cuz that’s too much pressure for me. and also since you did it everyone else does it and has done it since I was Robin #and it’s literally just a matter of time before I break from the pressure cuz I’m not fucking Superman and I can’t take it’ #and Jason with the whole UTRH thing. you know all Bruce had to say was that he had tried killing the joker over Jason multiple times and #maybe just explain to Jason WHY he doesn’t kill. a simple ‘you’re better than me because if I killed one person I’d kill everyone’ #or it could even just be a simple ‘I do love you Jason youre the kid that I felt most comfortable loving’ #and also maybe a ‘I don’t think anything changed after my death and that makes my death meaningless which I think goes against your no kill #rule because I hat is the rule of not a reminder taht death means something. and by that logic my death already went against the rule so why #can’t you do it again for the man that murdered me.’ and Bruce needs to make a presentation: ‘all the ways Jason’s death meant something’ #and Tim just needs a simple ‘I don’t see you as work I see you as family.’ maybe even a ‘you don’t have to be the grown up in this relati #anymore I’m sorry you were one to begin with. you should’ve always been the child’ #now his miscommunication with Damian goes much deeper but I’m one hundred percent sure if they sit down and air out all of their feelings it #would help a lot but I have a feeling that won’t happen #a ‘I have trouble understanding you because both your trauma and compassion run deeper than mine and I also never had to grow up to be a #weapon’ from Bruce and a ‘I don’t understand your optimism and moral stubbornness and easness why is it so easy to be good for u?’ #his miscommunication with Cass stems from two things a simple ‘why are you so afraid to show how deeply you love?’ from Cass maybe a #‘I’m jealous of you because you’re better than me not only in fighting but morally and emotionally’ from Bruce should fix it #and Steph— look I’m not even going to TRY to get into that that goes SO much deeer and wider than any one else’s miscommunication #but maybe a ‘you reminded me of Jason at a time where that wasn’t a good thing’ from Bruce should start things up #for Duke a ‘I can never truly understand what you’re going/have gone through and for that I’m sorry’ from Bruce should suffice #maybe also Bruce telling him that just because he sees Duke as a son doesn’t mean he’s trying any less to get Duke his parents back #oh and babs just needs to go up to him and say ‘I don’t like that what happened to me happened for your story and not mine and I don’t like #that you don’t let me make it into my story’ and then Bruce can follow up and say ‘I see so much of myself in you and it makes me worry and #also I can never look at you without feeling guilty cuz you’re right what happened to you happened for MY story so I’m at fault’ #then the two can go back to being too much like each other and sitting at their respective computers

[syl-stormblessed]

guys i’m like 70% of the way through Jedi: Survivor and i am losing my absolute shit oh my god hgnfnfhghfhjdjdhf this game is amazing

#im absolutely in love with this game #so far it’s a solid 11/10 #im not kidding i have NOTHING negative to say about it #i can’t play again until wednesday tho bc i’m going to my dad’s house until then :( #i’m going to cry #spoilers in the next few tags #i just did the fight with dagan gera where cal LITERALLY kills him #currently this game has no living villain #so. is the rest of the game gonna focus on cal corruption arc?!?!?! #please?!?!?!?! #i’d kill for that?!?!?!? #also WILL SOMEONE TALK ABOUT MERRICAL WITH ME PLEASE #I’M LOSING MY MIND OVER THEM #MERRICAL NATION WE ARE WINNING #jedi survivor #jedi fallen order #jfo

[http-byler]

everyone who’s gonna meet/take a photo with/get an autograph from Caleb, Charlie, Eduardo, and/or Noah this weekend… how does it feel to live my dream </3

#I’m literally in your walls #i am killing and maiming and biting and and and #/j but only kind of #I’m a measly 6 hours away but far too broke to attend </3 #begging everyone who’s going to meet them to be Normal abt it! <33 #please don’t ask them inappropriate questions or things abt s5 that they contractually cannot answer!! #no but seriously #I hope everyone has fun at the event and has a good experience meeting them!! #I’d probably die if I met Caleb irl tbh… but I’d die happy <3 #byler #< target audience #st cast #elijah speaks

[soyboywenzie]

for all the parroting about loving evil characters and wishing they were worse and hating the morality argument, team green does not like the fact that their favs aren’t well liked, nor cared about that much 😗

#house of the dragon #hotd #like no one is going to tear alicent from your hands #she ain’t real #none of them are but yall choose them #yall choose to like this characters and defend them so do and don’t get mad when you get eaten up by the majority #‘i’d go on about why I don’t like rhaenyra but id sound like a westerosi peasant.’ ?????? #and that doesn’t concern you??? #you ain’t gotta like her enjoy the characters you want but #AND THIS IS A BIG BUT #but if you are going to admit to hating her for weird ass standards that the book and author are telling you is unjust and unfair than maybe #just maybe. you are the one who missed the point #maybe. just maybe. you hate her because many can recognize the unjust system and nature of Westeros and have no problem with it being killed #maybe you hate that no one cares about your favs past the dance but many do care about the characters you hate?? #or maybe you can’t stand a bad bitch having people who will defend her through everything even if your favs don’t have that #who knows but back to the main plot here #you chose them. you sit here and give whatever argument you want but it’s not a good one and you know it #‘she has bastards?’ the people who want to destroy her created those rumors. #‘she married daemon?’ people who hated him put aside their differences for him because it wasn’t about him #‘she lazy and spoiled.’ your favs son or your fav is literally the same if not worse #you don’t have good arguments none and you all know that #idk but yall have deluded yourselves into thinking the greens were popular #then get hit by the broke baltimore bridge when you remember that not even half the fandom likes these guys #the greens being so unpopular even after the showrunners sent a clean up crew made it clear that the personalities weren’t the issue #sympathetic or not they are the bad guys. they are the antagonists. THEY ARE NOT THE SIDE THE MAJORITY IS ROOTING FOR. #their actions are the reason they aren’t like and they are worse than whatever rhaenyra has done to piss you off #deal with it and love them as villains or wtf up and cry. i don’t know just deal with it without bitching.

[albertbreasker]

modern au knives is a motherfucker, a real asshole- sharp and cold, calculating and mean but. if he has access to a piano and you ask him to play ANY song. he will listen to it and play it for you on the spot like his life depends on it. he doesn’t care about you- he’s showing off how much better he is than everyone.

#trigun #millions knives #trigun stampede #this is inspired by the pianist who played kill bill by sza despite not knowing it #knives is literally so pretentious #like if he’s in a public place with a piano he’s gonna show off. he revels with attention like that #people knowing he’s better than them #if i was there i’d ask knives to olay brand new city by mitski and have a little meltdown #like if you’re gonna be like that i’m gonna make this experience suck for everyone too #n.txt #i love writing little silly things while high lmao

[attackradish]

Hello my mental health is the worst it’s been all year. If not longer

I could verify this by going through my vent tag but I am not going to because that takes time. This trait of mine is part of the problem but I’m not in a place to fix that right now.

ANYWAYS why am I like this. I have some inklings as to why.

Work is now opening an hour sooner. Meaning I have to wake up earlier and I have been losing sleep as a result. This is not good for the Mental Health

Current drama with a coworker that I am not going to go into that because it’s complicated and rather stupid.

Today was supposed to be my Tax Day where I did my Taxes but I was hit by dread this morning so I didn’t get around to it until like 5PM and then realized I don’t have one of my W2 forms and I can’t go looking around for that because my dad will tell me how stupid I am and how I never care about anything and am doing this on purpose. And I actually can’t care about anything I feel, but it’s not like I’m not trying it’s just that I have no soul.

I cannot give my friends the attention they deserve. I am burnt out I have no energy left for being a friend and yet there are people who miss me. And I can’t be there often enough for them not to miss me. I am neglecting them and I am a terrible person but I need to be alone.

I really do feel that I have reached my full potential. There is simply not enough caring or gumption or whatever it is I’m missing in this body of mine to achieve anything further. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to move out or date or even get a job I like better than DQ. I’m done being closeted in my parents house and I’m ready to quit early.

I can’t quit early. Firstoff I have friends who care about me, and I can’t imagine what it’d do to them. I’ve got a baby niece in the house too who smiles when she sees me so I gotta live for her too. And that’s not mentioning how difficult and impractical non-painful methods of dying are. Seriously. Best option I have is locking myself in the walk in freezer with a CO2 canister, but I learned from a cool book I read that high concentrations of CO2 will make you feel like you’re suffocating, and the best gas for that purpose is Nitrogen. Which costs money and is very conspicuous.

I also don’t want to die. I just want the suffering to be over, and death really seems to be the only way out aside from Miracles like universal housing passing within the next year or two, or I attain Godhood and can just do as I please. I think about dying and it makes me want to cry. Being on the verge of tears for long periods of time really does something for my perception of my mental health, being that I haven’t been like this since the family dog died. Maybe crying would do me good.

I should probably get a therapist but I don’t have time or energy for my friends, scheduling these things takes time and effort and I don’t want to have to talk to my parents about it. I should probably get antidepressants. Also my laundry basket from yesterday isn’t even all the way filled up and it’s 9:58. And I have work tomorrow but no uniforms. God I just need to rest.

BUT HERE’S THE THING ABOUT REST. I’VE ALREADY HAD A WEEK OFF OF WORK BECAUSE OF THE FEVER. MY JOB IS UNDERSTAFFED AND I CANT MAKE THEM SUFFER THROUGH THAT AGAIN AT SUCH SHORT NOTICE.

Anyways I have been putting no effort into finding a place since like last year, or finding a therapist. Or really anything. I’m not sure if I can even do that. I have reached my limit. I’m simply not much substance. I’m nice to have around and talk to but quite frankly I don’t have it in me to actually survive on my own. I don’t have it in me to die either. So who knows what is going to happen. I’m going to rot forever. Dying a slow death with nothing but fantasy to dull the edges.

I have a friend who’s offered to let me crash at their place, but I can’t take them up on that offer because I’ll just be the same lifeless rock that I am. Forever. And I can’t do that to them. If I can’t break free on my own then I’m afraid I never will. My chrysalis will just stay gathering dust. Sapping resources. I need to grow wings but I don’t know if I can.

So here I remain. Closeted at my parent’s house. Probably forever. The brain does not engage. I’ve been dead for years but the body still breathes. This is all I am and it is not enough. I’m gonna pretend I live in Star Wars now until I forget the useless thing that I am. I have work tomorrow.

#vent.tw #Suicide mention #Literally I cannot kill myself. I lack the executive function and the conviction #If I had enough motivation to get sleeping pills or nitrogen or whatever I’d have enough to get an apartment and be free from this mess #God. I’m going to die of old age #Anyways I was considering going to a friend over this but I have not invested enough in those friendships to just dump this on one of them #Out of the blue