#I saw another post about this and so many feelings were brought up I guess I had to make a post about it

[livelist]

Okay because clearly I am still upset about this.

April 23:

To Spn Con Audience: “By show of force: how many of you would consider yourself introverts?" How many extroverts? And how many bisexuals?” “I’m all three.”

April 25:

“I want to deeply apologize for misspeaking this weekend...“My clumsy intention was to wave off actually discussing my sexuality, but I badly fumbled that and [I] understand that was seen as me coming out as bisexual.”

THIS DOES NOT MAKE SENSE. Misha did not need to "wave off actually discussing [his] sexuality." He brought it up himself. He is literally just speaking at a podium, and of his own accord, announces that he is Extroverted, Introverted, and Bisexual. That is a pre-planned, pre-written statement if I have EVER heard one!!! Literally like... bisexual doesn't even make sense in that list? Its clearly a joke so he can come out in a funny way?

Like what argments even exist that can possibly explain what he meant if not "he is Extroverted, Introverted, and Bisexual"? Do you think he just stupidly thought bisexual was a word for both extroverted and introverted? Because that seems fucking impossible!!!

Why would bisexuals be in that list? Also, hes asking the crowd, meaning he literally does not need to say that he is ANY of them!! The whole and only point of asking was so that he could announce that he was bisexual!!! That is the only reason to do this little song and dance audience interaction in the first place!!

I mean, its not like he asked "How many straights? How many gays? How many bisexuals?" And then he felt weird and said "I’m all three!" That could sound more like a natural conversation topic that ended with him making an awkward joke that he thought was nonsense and actually made him sound bisexual. But he obviously did not say or intend to say that, I’m just writing fucking fanfiction to try and make any of this make sense!

Like seriously, there is no way to interpret the actions of April 23 than an authentic coming out of a bisexual actor. I cannot fathom any other interpretation. It is not a mis-speak? What was he trying to say if not that? Please, give me any crazy theory you have, I’m begging, because I have nothing.

And that brings me to April 25.

I really don't see how to interpret the combination of these actions as anything other than biphobic. Either one (1.), he thought it was appropriate to joke about coming out as bisexual, and pretend that it was real for two days, or two (2.), his statement on April 25 was a lie, he did mean to come out, and was forced, by either internalized or externalized biphobia, back into the closet.

1., I think, is overtly biphobic, because intentionally deceiving people into thinking you have come out for multiple days, using that to gain attention and therefore money, making coming out and bisexuality seem like the butt of a joke, like.

Fuck I’m just feeling again how fucking CONFUSING this shit is! There is no logical way to interpret it!!!

Occam's Razor honestly, 1. Doesn't make sense its too weird and confusing for his statement on April 23 to be a joke, lie, or misspeak.... it doesn't compute...

2. Internalized or externalized biphobia forced him back into the closet.

Honestly this is the only thing that actually makes any sense to me. Whatever has been forcing/convincing him to stay in the closet for decades forced/convinced him to walk it back (poorly).

I honestly honestly hate to do this because I really try to take people at their word as much as possible. I give people the benefit of the doubt. And ESPECIALLY when it comes to sexuality. I really believe that we must defer to what they call themselves, because even if they will change their minds one day, I believe that questioning them or invalidating how they define themselves in the moment does more harm than good. Or, in simpler terms, I think that people getting constantly questioned about their sexuality usually makes it harder for them to figure it out themselves.

But also. This is a middle aged man, a public and loud supporter of queer people, and he knows he not only has a specific presence within that community, he knows what his fans *think* about his sexuality. (Whether or not the fans are problematic for that is a matter for a different time.) So forgive me if I feel I should hold him to a higher standard when he makes statements regarding his sexuality.

But this isn't a high standard.

The incredibly low bar he couldn't manage to cross?

Don't authentically come out and then take it back two days later

I didn't even think I had to make a fucking bar for that!!!

It's genuinely so hard to even wrap my mind around what the fuck happened here! What is he claiming happened? "Misspeak"?!?!

Okay. I’m sorry. It's so hard to be clear on this issue because it just genuinely doesn't make sense. But I hope I made it a slightly bit more clear why it doesn't make sense? And seriously, I need answers. At least give me a better lie so I can sleep better at night.

I would really care so little if he was bisexual if it wasnt for the fact that he SAID HE WAS ffs I’m out I hope he and his wife and kids are very happy

#I have not watched or posted or cared about Misha or spn in over a decade #other than this confusing catastrophe #like ive never watched anything from Dream but if he did this #id be pissed off too #and he doesnt have the age or history of misha #sorry for bringing up dream he just popped into my mind as a modern tumblr example #anyway #yeah its just the incredibly confusing nature of this captivates me #I saw another post about this and so many feelings were brought up I guess I had to make a post about it #please engage with me about this but please be nice #misha collins #misha collins bisexual #misha collins sexuality #biphobia #biphobic #bisexual #sexuality

[bijoumikhawal]

I mentioned this in the tags of a post the other day, but since NK is high profile and getting a lot of videos shared, and I saw someone today decry a short speech one of their rabbis gave as "extremist", I guess I'll make a post too

Neturei Karta is a Litvish Ultra-Orthodox/Haredi antizionist group. In my experience, they are the most high profile antizionist group that ties that stance to their religious practice within Judaism, but they are not the only group (the Satmar are also generally antizionist, and they're a larger group, but they don't like NK).

As I mentioned yesterday, there was an incident with Iran- one of two, actually, but this one gets brought up more- where NK sent speakers to a conference specifically for the purposes of defending the existence of the Holocaust, as several Holocaust deniers were in attendance. The speaker specifically chosen had his grandparents die in the Holocaust. However, he also was blunt in stating his opinion that Zionists used the Holocaust to oppress others, Zionists had been collaborators and thwarted efforts to save Jewish lives. This prompted the Chief Ashkenazi Rabbi to call for their excommunication, essentially, and for the Satmar and broader Haredi movement to tell people to stay away from them. These remarks are complicated; many incidents one could classify as collaboration were Zionists trying to move Jews out of Europe, to save lives. However, when the speaker said the third statement, I'm fairly certain he was genuinely expressing his own intergenerational trauma. Early Zionists did indeed, have a fair amount of animosity towards Orthodox Jews. At one point Theodore Herzl (a founder of the modern Zionist movement) did express the opinion that Jews should convert en masse to Christianity, and the feeling was that the Orthodox who refused should be left to their fate. This accusation is a response to a very real tension among Jews that existed at the time. And the collaborationism was not always about saving lives; the Lehi gang, which committed the Deir Yassin massacre, sought out an alliance with the Nazis on several occasions, and expressed a desire for a totalitarian nationalist state.

Another incident was one where NK met with heads of state in early 2006, particularly Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, after criticizing other Jews for referring to remarks he made as antisemitic, and did an interview with Iranian press where they stated the Holocaust was used as a political tool by Zionists, that Zionism is "not Jewish, but political", and that not all Jews are Zionists. They also clearly stated that when they say they are not Zionists, they do not mean withdrawal to 67 borders, but a full dissolution of state, where Jews still can live with Palestinians. Later on in 2006, Ahmadinejad made comments about the reality of the Holocaust that prompted Haroun Yashayaei, one of the most prominent members of the Iranian Jewish community, to publicly speak put against him (and no, he didn't get arrested over that. He actually is also a movie producer and got an award in 2008).

It should be noted that in West Asia and North Africa, Iran is one of only a few countries that still has a significant Jewish population. The others are Turkey (14,500), Azerbaijan (7,200), Morocco (2,100), and Tunisia (1,000). For those unaware, this is significant because during the 1920s and 30s, many colonial governments stripped WANA Jews of citizenship, and in the 40s-60s, many post colonial WANA countries forcibly expelled local Jews. As a result, the centuries long presence of Jews in countries such as Egypt or Syria is down a hundred or fewer individuals in many cases. Ideologically, I do not support Iran's government because it's a theocratic state that treats Kurds like shit, but all of NK's interactions with Iran must be contextualized in light of this. This is not me using WANA Jews as a rhetorical device either: my paternal country, Egypt, which I wish I could so much as visit, is such a country. The 2016 Iranian census puts the country's Jewish population at 9,826. That's a number that I would weep to see reported in Egypt, and the second highest of any West Asia or North African country.

Personally while I hold no serious ideological disagreement with NK over antizionism, I do not wholly support them for other reasons (gender/sexuality politics reasons primarily). I bring up these incidents with Iran because in the past I've seen people claim they are Holocaust deniers, or that they think Jewish people brought the Holocaust on themselves. I have never seen a NK member say ANYTHING of that sort, and the idea that Jews bring antisemitism in any form on themselves is in fact an actual belief Herzl held. The closest I've heard is when NK distributed leaflets after a Chabad was attacked in Mumbai where they criticized Chabad for being in bed with Zionists. I'll be linking some articles in the replies of this post about this, including the text of the actual speech given at the Tehran conference so it can be read in full.

#cipher talk #Palestine #Neturei Karta #Antizionism

[uwingdispatch]

From the Very First Night

From the Very First Night

Notes: Ezra Bridger/Reader, established relationship, gender neutral reader, post-rebellion/post-war, hurt/comfort, chronically ill/disabled reader

CW: light discussion of past traumas/implied PTSD

Ao3 Link

★★★★★★★★

The day you met Ezra Bridger you laughed when he told you his name. 

“Forgive me,” you told him, “but you’re not the first man on Lothal to try and pick me up while claiming to be the guy in the mural on the wall outside.”

“Well that’s new,” he said. “I tell you my full government name and you think it’s a ruse. Maybe I should have used one of my old aliases.”  

You’d been finishing up some work in what had come to be your favorite caf bar in town, a few blocks from your home on Lothal. And you were thinking about leaving when a man approached with a look in his eyes that, on another day, might have prompted you to pick up your comms and fake an emergency call from a friend.

But now he was reaching for his wallet, pulling out an ID. “You can check my chain code if you want. I didn’t realize I had so many doppelgängers.”  

You quirked an eyebrow. None of the other “Ezras” you’d met had offered ID but, as soon as you saw it, you felt heat rush to your cheeks. “Okay,” you said. “This is embarrassing. ”

He smiled warmly as he put his wallet away. “To be fair, most of the stuff in town depicts me as a kid, and I didn’t have this handsome beard back then. But I can appreciate a skeptic.”

You put away your datapad, your instincts still split between staying where you were and running out the side door. Surprising yourself, you say, “But I’m not hearing you say that you're not trying to pick me up.”

“Well…maybe. That depends, I guess, on whether you mind if I join you.”

You nodded, and he sat opposite you, the corners of his blue eyes crinkling when he smiled. Up close, you could almost see the teenage boy from the mural. But his hair was longer, dark curls falling soft around his face, and he had a short beard that he did wear quite well.

You wondered if his nerves had caught up with him as he ran a hand through his hair, the late afternoon light coming in through the window catching a streak of silver at his temple.

“Sometimes it feels like I know everyone in this city. Or at least that everyone in this city feels like they know me.” he said. “But you’re new, aren’t you?”

“What gave me away?” you asked.

“Well, I could never forget such a lovely face.” 

“Are you serious right now?”

“I really am.”

There was something sincere about him, despite the flirtations. Something about the way he moved was honest. Welcoming. A server brought him a cup of caf and Ezra exchanged a few words with him in Rodian. 

“So how long have you been in town?” He asked.

“About eight months,” you said. “I just hit this point where I felt like a fresh start might be nice. I don’t usually abandon ship when things get rough, but I thought maybe this one time…I can’t believe I’m telling you this.”

He winked. “I used a Jedi mind trick.” 

“Right,” you said, fairly certain he was kidding.

He shrugged. “And somehow you landed on Lothal.”

“I narrowed it down to the places where I’d be able to have my astromech serviced.”

“Must be a special astromech.”

“She’s a therapy droid.”

“Ah,” he said. “There are several mechanics in Capital City who work with that program.”

You were a bit taken aback at how unfazed he was at the mention of your therapy droid—issued by the New Republic. Similar programs had been available to injured veterans before, but the civilian program was newer. And he not only knew about the program, but didn’t seem bothered by the fact that you had a condition that required this kind of aid.

“We had a lot of options,” you said. “But Ceetoo and I decided Lothal seemed nice. So…I’m here.” 

“Glad you are,” he said, both hands cupping his caf mug.

“You just met me and the first thing I did was call you a liar.”

“That’s what I like about you.”

A day would come when you’d realize what he meant then. That when you saw him you weren’t thinking about all the war stories, about the way Lothal had memorialized him when they’d thought he was dead. That he had a chance, at least for a moment, to show someone who he was without the burden of their assumptions and expectations. 

You would also come to realize that from the first time Ezra smiled at you, there was no coming back. He had you, melting like chocolate in the palm of his hand. Because he saw you too, like no one else ever had before.

***

It’s late afternoon when C2-B35 comes in from the garage bleeping about the line at the pharmacy. She’d gone with Ezra to pick up your medication after getting your doctor to call in something new for your joint pain. Ezra could have gone by himself but, because of an incident early in your dating history when there’d been a mix-up, Ceetoo almost always insists on going with him—and he learned a long time ago not to fight a stubborn astromech.

Ezra finds you on the sofa where you’ve been trying to relax, the pain in your back making it hard to even lie still. He knows better by now than to tell you that you’ve been working too hard, that you should take more breaks. He knows to help you up, taking you gently into his arms and kissing your hair. By the time he hands you the tablets, you’re already feeling a bit of relief.

You take the medicine and let out a heavy sigh, resting your head on Ezra’s chest before whispering a thank you. 

“I wish I could heal,” he says.

“We still don’t know if that kind of healing would help me,” you say. “Genetic condition.”

It’s a dance you dance every time you have a flare like this, bad enough that Ceetoo insists on contacting your doctor. 

“I met a kid once who could do it. His dad said he could nullify the effects of a neurotoxin. Close a wound like it had never been there at all.”

“What did the kid say about it?”

“The kid doesn’t talk much. Still working through some things, I think.”

He gets quiet, and from the look in his eyes you know that he’s gone somewhere in his mind lost you can’t follow. It’s been 25 years since he last saw his adoptive father, the man who’d trained him in the Force, and there are some wounds that time never quite heals. Ezra is still working through some things, too.

“Hey,” you say. “Come back to me.”

He smiles, his eyes bright as he gently squeezes your arm. “I’m right here, sunshine.” 

The medication starts to hit, and you let out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding. You reach for his face, the sharp line of his bearded jaw, the parallel scars on his left cheek. “Just as you are, you’re enough, Ezra. I don’t need a Jedi. I just need you.”

C2-B35 beeps irritably before retiring to her room, reminding you that you haven’t eaten since breakfast. 

“Thank you, Ceetoo,” you call, with a promise that you’ll have a proper dinner.

“Is it helping?” Ezra asks. “The medicine?”

“It is,” you say. “Finally.”

“Have you really not eaten all day?”

Your face tells him everything. 

“Right,” he says. “Dinner. I could make some quick dumplings? I think I froze some last time to fry later…I’d just have to make the sauce, really.”

He’s up and in the kitchen, pulling jars of spices out of the pantry, and you know he can already taste this comfort dish, and so can you.

So much of his life had been unstable after Ezra’s parents disappeared. He was on his own at such a young age, and then after a few short years in the Rebellion he ended up in exile on Peridea. Now, everything he had felt like a luxury to him: a permanent home, a pair of naughty indoor loth-cats, soft clothes he wore without consideration for armor. He’d told you about learning to cook when he came back to Lothal and, now that he has access to just about any ingredient for any dinner in the galaxy, he has every intention of not only enjoying the luxury of any hot meal he can dream up, but to make sure you enjoy food as well. When Ezra offers to cook, you never say no.

“Ezra?”

“What do you need, love?”

“I need you to kiss me.”

And he does, pulling you up from the sofa, taking your face in his hands as he presses his lips to yours, his neatly trimmed beard soft against your skin. You’re lacing your fingers through his dark curls when he pulls away to look right into your eyes.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” you whisper.

And he replies, “I can’t imagine being anywhere else.” 

***

It was night before you left the caf bar and, at this realization, Ezra insisted on walking you home. “Unless you don’t feel comfortable with that,” he’d said. “I would understand. It’s just dark out and…”

And something about being with Ezra just made you feel safe. Even on that first night. You’d never let a strange man walk you home before—it was on its face a bad idea. But you’d stayed out much later than you normally would, and the idea of being alone felt far more unsafe than being with this charming man.

“I don’t normally do things like this,” you told him, the words coming out way too fast, just a block from your building.

“I figured,” he said. “For what it’s worth…I haven’t done anything like this in quite a while.

This did surprise you. “Walked someone home?”

There was a playful tone to his voice when he replied, “Approached a beautiful stranger in a caf bar.” 

“You sure are bold for someone who doesn’t regularly…do whatever this is.”

“I just…” he started and paused, taking a breath. “This is going to sound like a line, but I just felt so drawn to you.”

“In the Force?”

“Maybe.”

“It does sound like a line,” you said. “But somehow I believe you. Jedi mind trick?”

“I’d never actually—”

“I know.”

You were both standing outside your door, a cool evening breeze in the air. You took all of him in—his firm chest beneath the deep v of his tunic, his dark hair catching on the wind, those blue eyes that seemed to see right past all of your walls. You’d met this man just a few hours ago but, beyond all reason, you so wanted to—

“Can I kiss you?” He asked, the words falling from his lips as if he hadn’t considered the consequences.

You nodded and he took a step closer, cupping your face in his hands, his nose brushing yours as he leaned in to press the most delicate kiss to your lips. And you felt his smile just as you felt that joy in yourself—a spark of something unlike anything you’d felt before. Maybe it was the Force, but every inch of your being wanted to be close to this man as you reached for his face, drawing him nearer, slipping a hand into his hair as the kiss deepened.

“I should go,” Ezra said, breathless into your ear.

“Why?” you asked.

“I have an appointment.”

“Really?”

“No.”

“Then stay.”

Nervously you fumbled with your keys, dropping them not once but twice as you tried to open your door, Ezra eventually placing them steadily into your hand, and just the touch of his fingertips against your palm sent a pleasant shiver through you. Quickly you shooed an alarmed Ceetoo away as you entered. Unlike you, her memories included files from the war, and she recognized Ezra as soon as she saw him. Beeped out something along the lines of this one’s mostly trustworthy and I’m going to charge.

“Mostly?” Ezra said, almost in a whisper. “I wonder what she’s heard.”

You bite back a laugh. “I just need you to know I don’t normally do this either.”

“Okay.”

“I could make some tea.”

“Sure.”

But his arms were around you again and you both stumbled toward the sofa, falling into the cushions wrapped in each other like teenagers, wholly unworried about anything else in the galaxy.

That tea didn’t get made for hours. And it was nearly dawn when you retired to your bedroom and Ezra fell asleep on your sofa, your loth-cat sitting at his feet. When you woke, he was gone, a note left on your kitchen counter: Had to work this morning, but I hope you’ll call me. You traced your finger over the comms code left in scratchy handwriting below, wondering for a split second if this could be real. But if you closed your eyes you could still feel the sensation of his fingertips ghosting over your cheek when you’d handed him a blanket the night before. His voice when he’d whispered in your ear, “Sleep well, sunshine.” 

★★★★★★★★

Thank you so much for reading! They really gave us Hot!Ezra in the Ahsoka series and I'm just here to be a gremlin about it. I hope this fic made you feel seen and loved.

I have a taglist now! Sign up here if you want to be tagged in future fics. (And choose if you only want to be tagged for certain characters.) In the meantime, I’m tagging my taglist as well as some folks who have been reblogging my fics. Love y’all!

@writingbylee @waterpancakeao3 @princessxkenobi @zinzinina @aerynwrites @belfry-bat@phoenixhalliwell @r1-sw-lover @laserbrains @darthanakn @lovedbyth3sun @usernamesarebitches @maul-ologue @operation-spot @writeforfandoms @akgracemk @littlemousedroid @strwrs @saveatruckrideoptimusprime @galaxtic-writings @mintpurplemnm @againstacecilia @elasticreality @zombiedixon89 @forresway @sith-as-heck @alistocats @favficss @themandadolorian @ginger-swag-rapunzel @iamsuchanasshat @vvpoisonous @saradika @islandfrogeery @boba-brasso-bee @groguspawbeans @fluffyprettykitty @mischiefqueer @wretchedmo @wyn-n-tonic @dystopicjumpsuit

#middle-aged ezra bridger #ezra bridger #ezra bridger x reader #ezra bridger x gn reader #ezrabridger x gn!reader #adult ezra bridger #ahsoka series #ahsoka series fanfiction #star wars fanfiction #star wars rebels #and a loth-cat because I can #disabled reader #chronic illness #hurt/comfort #just a little domestic fluff #and a first meeting #comfort reads #the fluffiest fluff

[bbobpul]

break my heart again 2 — njm

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader SUMMARY.how's jaemin gonna give back for all of y/n's efforts now that he finally can? it's been years—just how much has everything changed? GENRE. angst, fluff, she fell first 🤭 W/C. 3.5k NOTE. hello, part two is here! so sorry i couldn't make a taglist. i didn't have time to make one. nevertheless, i hope this fic make its way back to you. love u all and thankies sm !!!! also, my requests are open !!!

(⁠☉⁠｡⁠☉⁠)⁠!⁠→ my other works !!!!!! part one here!!

i find it hard to picture myself ever being as dedicated to something or someone again, just like how i dedicated my entire college life to na jaemin.

lately, i've been feeling like i forgot what it's like to actually have a dream. back then, na jaemin was my dream, he was my driving force. i would force myself to wake up so early in the morning just so i could see him (or his car) enter the gates of the university. i would go to school even though i am sick and feel a lot better when i get home because i saw na jaemin. but now two years after graduating, i still haven't found a decent job that i actually enjoy.

it's a common experience that many people go through, and i suppose i shouldn't complain about it. maybe i need to put in more effort and push myself harder. part of me wonders if having na jaemin back in my life would rekindle that same sense of dedication that i once had. but as i say these thoughts out loud, they sound absurd, even to myself. why would i wish for my first love to return just so i could find a decent job? why would i long for na jaemin to come back merely to feel that spark in my life again? it's puzzling why i'm even dwelling on thoughts of him and wondering if he holds the key to my happiness and success.

oh, to dream.

oh, for that old dedication to still burn within you.

if only you hadn't acted so dumb that day. could life have taken a different path? are you even happy now? if you hadn't let fear hold you back back then, if you'd actually been brave enough to listen and follow through, would you be happier today?

but no matter how much you keep bothering yourself with that memory, if people come up to you and ask if you feel bad about everything that happened that day, you'd say no. you don't feel bad at all.

deciding to let him go was one of the best things you did. he seemed happy when you left, and after that, you never heard anything about him. he's like a touchy subject in your group of friends, which can be tough sometimes since you share friends. but does it really matter now? him not being in your life probably means he's happier and more peaceful, right?

are you feeling peaceful? is being stuck in a 9-5 job that hardly brought you joy a happy situation? scratch that. did being in that job make you happy? clearly not, as you've just mustered the bravery to quit. and in doing so, you've never felt more joyful.

did you really make the right decision?

just as you were pondering your own question, your phone buzzed on the bedside table. you grabbed it and saw that the caller was renjun, your incredibly patient best friend.

"y/n," he said, his tone becoming unusually serious. "what's up?" you asked. "do you need money?" "yeah?" "here's the deal: our college is putting together a documentary film, and they've chosen your department. but guess what? your old classmates are bombarding me with messages because it looks like you're ignoring them all. frankly, i can't believe you even answered my call," he griped. "wait, hold on. what film? and why would they pick me? are they searching for someone with a post-college life so sad that it belongs in a documentary?" "well, you were practically a legend back in college, so… and apparently, the director specifically wants you, which leads to… well, another issue…" "what's the problem now?" "it's going to be directed by jaemin."

and just like that, you ended the call. but a few seconds later, renjun's call came in again.

"i'm not going to do it." "you stubborn brat." "why him?" "i have no idea!" "why is he even directing? wasn't he studying architecture or something?" "i don't know, y/n. i haven't heard a single thing about him since your graduation." "what do you mean?" "that's not important now, y/n. you're in need of money, right? seize the opportunity. do it for the cash." “so will you do it or will you do it?” “for the cash.”

...

"y/n, you've moved on, haven't you? what's done is done. i'm pretty sure jaemin has forgotten all about it. this chance is coming your way, so just accept it." "i guess i will."

you're drawn in by the idea of making some extra money and the possibility of catching the eye of potential agents or employers. right now, you're at a crossroads, thinking about how this documentary could be a stepping stone to more job opportunities down the line. this situation is different from what usually drives you – this time, it's not about others, it's about focusing on your own goals and aspirations.

you're deliberately avoiding dwelling on your past. just as renjun mentioned, you've moved beyond it. what's done is done. right now, your focus is firmly on the present and the potential that lies ahead in the future.

what's in the past is behind us, including whatever existed between jaemin and you.

from renjun

tomorrow at lunchtime, they'll be going over the schedules and discussing what to film. if you want, you can chat with the director now. his number is 0825 813 2000.

in response, you simply replied with a "okay."

the night before the lunch meeting, a jumble of emotions has you in its grip. the idea of reconnecting with jaemin, who used to be your best friend and is now someone distant, fills you with a sense of awkwardness. you tell yourself that this is about working together and the chance to grow professionally.

after taking a deep breath, you decide to shoot jaemin a text. your fingers hesitate as you type, and the uncertainty you're feeling seems to seep into your message. you finally press send, and your text reads, "hey, it's y/n. heard we're meeting tomorrow for the documentary. just wanted to check in before that."

in almost no time, your phone buzzes with a response: "hey y/n, good to hear from you. yeah, looking forward to our meeting. let's catch up and chat about the project."

the conversation is polite, but beneath the surface, there's an unspoken layer of complexity. you can feel the hesitation in your exchange, a silent recognition of the shared history that's now a distant memory. as you talk about the meeting and the documentary, the easy flow you once had is noticeably absent.

as the texts go back and forth, a sense of tension seems to hang in the air. it's as though the years of friendship you once had are casting a shadow over your conversation. the effortless connection you once shared now requires effort, and both of you can sense the change.

as the conversation wraps up with a simple "see you tomorrow," you're left with a mix of excitement and anxiety. the idea of seeing jaemin again, especially in a professional context, stirs up a range of emotions. this situation is a stark reminder of just how much things have changed – and maybe how some things can't go back to the way they were.

you believed the conversation had concluded, only for your phone to ring once more, bearing yet another message from him. as you read the words on the screen, "i missed you, y/n," a rush of emotions floods over you.

"what's going on with him?" you mutter to yourself, your eyebrows knitting together in confusion. your gaze remains fixed on the message for a moment, your attention drawn to the three blinking dots in the corner – a sign that he's in the process of typing a response. several more seconds tick by, the dots eventually vanishing, and in response, you shut your phone off. you make an attempt to settle into bed and get some rest, but truth be told, it's hard to claim you managed to sleep soundly that night. an undercurrent of thoughts and emotions keeps your mind restless.

the day of lunch lunch finally arrived. you sat across from jaemin, his words forming a distant hum as your thoughts remained clouded and preoccupied. the lingering impact of his recent message kept you in a state of unease, making it difficult to fully engage in the conversation he was leading.

then, something inside you snapped, and you found yourself abruptly interrupting him with a question that had been gnawing at you, "why me?"

he looked at you, his gaze steady, and his response was quick, "why not you?"

your frustration simmered as his words hit you. he was choosing to be cryptic, and it was only adding to your confusion. pushing past your exasperation, you pressed on, "listen, i know we didn't part on the best terms, but why come back now and act like everything's fine? i mean, sure, it's better than hostility, but why choose me? i'm the one who's no longer part of your life."

his expression remained neutral, void of any emotions as he replied, "that's not true."

you raised an eyebrow, challenging him to elaborate. "what's not true?"

"that you have nothing to do with my life, y/n," he stated firmly.

the weight of his words settled heavily between you two, the gravity of the situation growing more apparent. the lunch table had transformed into an arena for confronting unresolved issues.

you scoffed, unable to hold back your disbelief. "jaemin, i made one mistake, and now you're trying to imply that my actions shaped your entire life?"

his eyes held yours, unwavering. "y/n, it's not just about that one mistake. everything that followed, everything that shaped who i am today… it's all connected to you."

your mind reeled, trying to grasp the enormity of what he was suggesting. the complexities of your shared history seemed to crash over you, leaving you grappling with a whirlwind of emotions and a tangled web of unspoken feelings.

the weight of his words left you momentarily speechless, and in an attempt to shift away from the intensity, you sought to change the subject. "where are the other producers? why is it just you here?"

"y/n…" he began, his tone suggesting he wanted to continue the previous conversation.

however, you opted to sidestep the discussion entirely. you pretended as if the profound exchange hadn't just occurred. "i notice you're taking on the role of a director now. quite the career shift, huh?" you inquired, masking your internal turmoil with a casual demeanor. you acted as if there hadn't been a two-year gap in your connection, as though things between you were perfectly ordinary.

he met your gaze, a faint hint of something unreadable in his eyes. "i pursued another dream when i felt i'd lost the chance for my first one."

"your first dream… not architecture, then?" you prodded, curious about the direction he had taken.

he shook his head, a soft chuckle escaping him, leaving you puzzled yet again. "no, not architecture. well, i suppose that just wasn't meant for me back then, but maybe it is now."

the cryptic nature of his response only added to the layers of confusion and intrigue that surrounded him. there was something about the way he spoke that hinted at deeper currents beneath the surface, emotions and experiences that he hadn't fully revealed. you found yourself torn between the desire to push for answers and the instinct to allow him his privacy. the lunch meeting had transformed into a stage for untangling not just the complexities of the documentary but also the intricate web of emotions and history between you and jaemin.

leaving the restaurant, a whirlwind of unanswered questions dances in your mind. yet, for now, you choose to tuck those thoughts away, focusing instead on the looming filming date just a few days away – next saturday.

in the span of time between that lunch and the upcoming shoot, jaemin proves consistent in his attempts to bridge the gap between you two. he regularly reaches out, updating you about his day and proposing get-togethers, which you consistently decline.

the days pass, marked by a series of messages and missed opportunities. despite the undeniable tension, there's an undeniable persistence on jaemin's part, a determined effort to reconnect and reestablish a sense of familiarity. however, your apprehensions and the memories of your past dynamics hold you back, keeping you from embracing his overtures.

as the countdown to the filming day continues, you find yourself in a delicate dance – balancing the unresolved history between you and the prospects of the future. the lines between your personal and professional lives are blurred, and the documentary project becomes a backdrop against which the intricacies of your relationship with jaemin play out.

you find yourself constantly pondering what his intentions could be. his actions leave you wondering, and you can't help but question what he's aiming for. in your perspective, you're merely a negative aspect of his life – a streak of misfortune. you would have expected him to have learned from the past, but his determination remains unshakeable.

as you contemplate these thoughts, your phone lights up once more, bearing yet another message from him. his name on the screen triggers a whirlwind of emotions – a mixture of uncertainty, annoyance, and a hint of curiosity. opening the message, you brace yourself for whatever he might convey this time. the consistency in his attempts at communication only serves to deepen the intricate web of emotions you hold for him, leaving you caught between your shared history and the unpredictability of the present.

"the offer's still there, y/n. :)" "jaemin, let's be real. just because i'm on board with your documentary idea doesn't mean we're suddenly best buds again. a lot has changed." "i want to reconnect, though." "actually, scratch that. i want to get to know you all over again." "jaemin, i appreciate the effort, but let's keep things professional, okay?" “i’m sorry, y/n. goodnight.”

after your straightforward message, his responses ceased. a silence settled in, stretching on until saturday – the day you were set to see him again. the anticipation and uncertainty had been building, and now the moment was finally at hand.

you stepped into the studio and immediately noticed that you and jaemin were the only ones present. your confusion must have been evident on your face, prompting him to address the situation promptly.

"um, the team thought having fewer people in the room would create a more personal atmosphere," he began, his voice carrying a hint of unease. "and, well, they decided to keep me here, you know, being the director and all, and also because we have a history…"

his words trailed off, and there was a subtle vulnerability in his tone. it was as if he was acknowledging the intricacies of your past connection, while simultaneously recognizing the complexities it introduced into your current dynamic. the studio, usually a place of creativity and collaboration, had transformed into a space laden with the weight of your shared history.

"it's okay," you responded, your words carrying a touch of reassurance. as your reply registered, a faint smile tugged at the corners of his lips – a detail you couldn't help but notice. after all, it was that very smile that had ignited four years of your life, a smile that held memories and emotions you had both shared.

"um, i'll just ask you a few questions, and then you're free to go," he stated, his voice carrying a hint of nervousness that didn't escape your notice. this new facet of his demeanor felt unfamiliar to you, a departure from the confident jaemin you had known.

you found yourself disliking this uneasiness, and a thought occurred to you – maybe it was time to rekindle something within him. as he began asking you questions, you decided to respond in a way that would evoke a certain familiarity between you two. it was a subtle attempt to bridge the gap, to draw out the person you once knew.

you had believed that his silence was what you wanted. you had convinced yourself that distancing yourself from him would protect you from the past mistakes. but now, facing the reality of the situation, you realized that perhaps a certain selfishness was ingrained within you. maybe, just maybe, you yearned to erase the distance, to defy your own rationalizations.

in this moment, you found yourself yearning to rekindle what had been lost, to bring back a connection that once meant so much. the conflicting emotions within you painted a complex picture of your desires – a battle between self-preservation and the longing for something more.

however, as you locked eyes with him and saw the lack of any discernible emotion in his gaze, a haunting wave of fear resurfaced within you. in that moment, it was as if time rewound, taking you back to the day of your graduation when your heart and spirit had felt shattered. the memory of that painful experience rushed back, accompanied by the doubts and uncertainties that had plagued you.

if you were to truly confront your own feelings, you'd admit that what you witnessed that night had left you questioning your own worth. the events had stirred up doubts about whether you had ever been deserving of taking risks for, whether you had ever been someone worth fighting for.

"hey, good morning, y/n."

"morning, director."

"how's today treating you?"

"pretty good, thanks."

"hmm, and what's life been like after college?"

"…"

"take your time."

"at first, i felt okay. my friends were all getting closer to their dreams, and i was genuinely happy for them. especially…"

"especially who?"

"especially the person i left behind."

"…"

"i was content being happy for someone else. then another year went by, and i wasn't feeling so great anymore."

"do you really think they're happy?"

"hmm?"

"the person you left behind."

"yeah. and my other friends seem happy too. they've got jobs they love, they're with people they care about, and i only had… renjun *laughs* … but sometimes, i can't help but feel like i'm the one who got left behind, you know? even though i was the one who walked away."

"let's talk about your person."

"oh *laughs* he's not my person."

pausing for a moment, you glanced at jaemin behind the camera. the question lingered in your mind: what was he trying to do? his actions and intentions remained a puzzle.

his expression grew serious, his gaze fixed intently on you. it was as if he had something to convey, something he was holding back.

"the last time i actually saw him was in an instagram post. he was with some girl. it happened on my graduation day. i waited the whole day, hoping he'd appear in the midst of the crowd. when he didn't, i held onto the possibility of seeing him by the gates. but that didn't happen either. my last hope was maybe he'd send me a single message, but by the end of the day, nothing came. then i went on instagram and saw a photo – a warning, i guess. a warning that i should just stop hoping. that… happened a few weeks later, i think. or maybe it was just a few days after our argument, the one where he told me he couldn't love… yeah."

you met his gaze and once again, his face was serious. his eyes were furrowed and his mouth was slightly open. a few moments passed, and he let out a shaky breath. screw it, you thought, it's out there now and i don't care anymore.

your silent exchange was interrupted as he shifted the camera away. confusion clouded your thoughts as you watched him move. he turned back to you, his expression still serious, and then he grabbed a chair from the nearby table. he sat down with his back facing you.

the room felt charged with unspoken emotions, leaving you to question his intentions and actions. it was as if he was peeling away layers, searching for something beneath the surface.

"did you know that…" he began, his voice breaking the silence. "she was his sister?"

"i never told you about her, that's on me," he admitted with a chuckle. "that was her last day, y/n. so i decided to spend the entire day with her. i'm sorry."

you were taken aback. "i'm sorry–"

"it's okay, y/n."

"i know i left you with so many questions that night, but let me tell you… every effort you made, every cookie you baked, i cherished all of it. i loved you. i'm sorry if my actions made you doubt yourself."

another pause filled the air.

"i left when you left."

"you were my dream. architecture wasn't really my passion, you know? i was struggling a lot, but luckily, you were there with me. i decided to chase after what i truly loved when you left, because i realized if i wanted you back in my life, it should be when i'm at my best, right? i wasn't lying when i said i couldn't love. i didn't want to love you when i was broken. i wanted to be the best version of myself for you. i thought that if i wanted you to be with the best person, then that should be me. so i became that person, a director, and then i planned all of this." his eyes finally met yours.

"i was always looking at you."

tears welled up in your eyes, and he seemed to notice. he took a step towards you and enveloped you in his arms.

"i'm sorry for not holding onto you back then, baby. but i promise, i won't let go of you now," he whispered.

"i'm sorry for leaving, jaemin," you sobbed.

"shh, you did what you thought was right."

"do you want to have lunch with me now?" he asked.

a mixture of emotions flooded your heart, and with a nod, you replied, "yes, jaemin."

#jaemin imagines #jaemin angst #jaemin scenarios #jaemin fluff #jaemin x y/n #jaemin x reader #jaemin x you #nct dream imagines #nct dream x reader #nct dream angst #nct dream scenarios #bbobpul #Spotify #nct imagines #nct scenarios #nct dream #jaemin #nct dream x you #nct dream x y/n #na jaemin

[darkfire359]

What could have been: sympathizing with Ed in season 2

I've talked before about how much I love Ed and all his complexity. I've written more fanfic about him and Izzy than any other characters, in my entire history of fandom. And unlike many people, I wasn't unprepared for the dark direction his arc took in season 2; I wanted him to commit MORE atrocities, and I happily made comparisons between him and another one of my favorite characters, Hannibal Lector.

But one of the key things I wanted after he committed atrocities was for him to feel bad about it. And I thought we'd see that! After all, S1 Ed was so tormented about killing his dad (who was abusive and violent towards) him that he never killed (directly) again! He was so broken up about trying to kill Stede in s1e6 that he ended up crying in a bathtub. Just like he cried in the window sill after committing all the kraken horrors in s1e10. It seemed like this was a guy scared of his own inner darkness, convinced he was a monster, who would go around saying things like "I'm not a good person" and "You were always going to realize who I am."

And so even when s2 went darker than anyone expected—when he cut off more of Izzy's toes, and shot him in the leg, and made crewmen fight to the death for experiencing love, and sailed the entire ship into a storm to murder-suicide his crew—I was still ready to accept all that moral ambiguity and give him a hug afterwards. Because of course, I figured that after Ed was brought out of that dark place and those suicidal urges, he would feel horrible remorse. How could he not?

I was looking forward to seeing him break down crying, convinced he was an irredeemable, unforgivable monster. (Which of course, would make it all the more touching when people inevitably did forgive him, and when he did redeem himself). Maybe Ed would even go too far with trying to atone, like in Mercy, one of my favorite post-s1 fics. Probably, I figured, Ed's quest for redemption would be one of the main themes in the second half of season 2.

So it was strange to watch e4, when Ed looked nothing but annoyed at everyone for chaining him up and banishing him, and then he went to hang out with his old friends like he'd done nothing wrong. When after the crew unanimously voted him out, Stede brought him back to the ship literally that same evening, and Ed saw no problem with that. Okay... maybe he's still processing?

Then e5 came, and that episode was about Ed's redemption. Yay! Except... Ed didn't seem to care? Other people made him wear the bag and the bell. He asked how long it'd take people to get over it, guessing "like a day." He gave an influencer-esque non-apology to the crew. He said "I took a man's leg" rather than calling Izzy by name. He literally doesn't remember the circumstances of pushing Lucius off the boat. He does ultimately give a real apology to Fang—for tormenting him years ago, rather than anything from his actual kraken era. I love e5 for the Izzy+Stede dynamic, but watching Ed be an unrepentant asshole here is painful. There is nothing about this that convinces me Ed wouldn't slide right back to being evil if Stede were to leave again.

And the thing is, it didn't have to be like this! We could have gotten Ed breaking down crying with guilt like in s1e6, and it would have made him much more sympathetic—not to mention the fact that Ed really is just an adorable cryer. Alternatively, we could have had some real deep diving about why Ed never apologizes (is he afraid of seeming weak?) or why he's so uncaring about others' pain (has he seen too many friends die over the years, to the point of going numb?)

By episode 6, it seems like most characters have moved on. Stede says something about Ed turning poison into positivity, which feels completely unearned. He pays for the party—but he'd previously tried to make the crew throw their cut of the loot into the ocean. He makes some attempts to best Ned and protect Stede, but Stede ends up saving the crew instead—from a pirate who only showed up in the first place because Ed was intentionally trying to piss him off. Ed is sad that Stede kills someone, and this would be a great time to again make Ed sympathetic! To have him talk about how he doesn't want that for Stede, because his own violence has weighed on him so deeply. But nope.

E6 does see Ed actually apologize to Izzy—and he's terrible at it. He's just like, "Sorry about your leg," makes no eye contact, and flees immediately afterwards. We do see some hints that this shitty apology isn't really indicative of Ed's true feelings, given how he has those flashbacks to the scenes of hurting Izzy seemingly haunting him; but it's very brief. It would be a great time to address Ed's horrific tendency towards conflict-aversion and avoiding awkward conversations in relationships—the same tendency that made s1 Ed never inform Izzy that the plan to kill Stede and the Revenge crew had changed. This would be another great opportunity to help us sympathize with Ed again—to have us see how it's not that he doesn't want to communicate these things, it's that these conversations are terribly stressful and anxiety-inducing for him. But nah, why would OFMD need to include those things for Ed?

E7 happens, and still nothing. If anything, there was a great opportunity for Ed to at least show himself to be a kind person to Stede—maybe nobly stepping in to save the day, even though he's annoyed that Stede's getting all this attention now. You know, like Stede did for him back in s1e5, when the situation was reversed. But nope, Ed runs off to be a fisherman, not having learned any of the earlier season's lessons about whims. He only stops being a fisherman because he's bad at it.

I was still hoping for something big in e8–some huge selfless, gesture that Ed would do to cover for all of his inability to do the little gestures. Ed is good at grand gestures! Swimming back to the ship after he left, then taking the Act of Grace in s1 was HUGE. Very selfless, very sweet! He could have done something like that for Izzy, Lucius, and the traumatized crew. Some kind of heroic gesture to help others more than himself. But nope. In some sense, Izzy dying is one of the greatest indications of Ed's wasted potential, because we narratively had a great opportunity for Ed to be able to save someone... but he didn't.

(Admittedly, Ed is not a complete dick here—he helps Izzy when he's limping, he says some genuinely apologetic stuff when Izzy's dying, and he finally gives Izzy his attention and care. But then after the funeral, he's still like "Well, that's that.")

It's so frustrating. It's not that I don't want to like Ed, or that I don't want to sympathize with him. I really, REALLY do! I don't even need Ed to successfully do anything to earn forgiveness! I'd take Ed trying and failing. I'd take him wanting to try, but being so convinced of his monstrousness that he never makes the attempt. But give me something. Anything other than the unexamined apathy that he has so much of the time.

The thing is, s2 lost the ability for Ed's mistreatment of people to be just another "of course he's violent, he's a pirate" quirk. They were pretty explicit about how abusive Ed was (Jim's comment in e1, the joke in e4 people assumed Ed had hit Stede) and how much he traumatized people (Lucius and the whole crew very clearly have PTSD in episodes 4 and 5). This is serious stuff, which he did to other main characters, which is going to make a lot of viewers look at him pretty harshly.

And that's manageable—Hannibal Lector managed to be most textbook-abusive asshole in the world, committing atrocities and generally being unrepentant left and right, and viewers STILL found him lovable and sympathetic. You can do that! But you need to:

a. make it clear that anyone with the relevant information calls them out for being awful, even multiple episodes later

b. make it clear that they care deeply and genuinely about their wronged loved ones

c. make them willing to actually make REAL sacrifices

I watched so many people start to dislike or outright hate Ed in season 2. It made me really sad. But I couldn't blame them for feeling that way. For all that Ed is supposedly one of the two protagonists in OFMD—a character whose mistakes should be the most understandable, whose mental state should be the most resonant—the show seemed to entirely drop the ball on writing him as such.

#edward teach #ofmd critical #ofmd season 2 #ofmd season 2 spoilers #ofmd #our flag means death #izzy hands #arguably the writers' mistake with Izzy is easier to fix in fanfiction #just undo the last 10 minutes #but now I feel like Ed fics after s2 have to fix huge chunks of his characterization #I also think it'd be more reasonable to make Ed not give a shit about the crew if the show just like... admitted that directly? #but we've got Stede making comments about Ed turning poison into positivity #we've got Izzy saying the crew loves Ed and is his family #and while it's not OOC for either of them to just be delusional and overprojecting their own love for Ed #it's weirdly unexamined #same thing with Ed's “I don't kill people thing” after he murders British officers left and right in s2e8 #was Ed's whole talk with Stede in s1e6 just a lie? #obviously Ed was stretching definitions / using it as a coping mechanism but I thought he was at least telling the truth as he saw it

[rd0265667]

MC(Haerin HC)

"Hey Haerin! What're you doing here so early?" You asked, catching your breath post shock At the door frame was Kang Haerin, known to many as the feline looking girl from NewJeans, known to you as your girlfriend of 3 months. "Y/N?" She questioned, eyes narrowing at the blaring red flags. The fidgeting, sweating, and most importantly. Haerin? You hadn't called her that in ages "Hey, yeh, what's wrong? Aren't you supposed to be at practice by now? We were supposed to meet in an hour!" You hurriedly checked your watch, as Haerin's eyebrows furrowed. She didn't have practice today, it was her birthday, which she was looking forward to celebrating together with her love. But now, she had more questions than anything, like why you seemed to not remember her birthday, or even want her there. "Oh right, I misread the time." Haerin mumbled, her eyes bolting around the room as she left the house, before resting her ears on the door. "Alright, we can continue, she's gone." Haerin's eyes bulged open. Who were you talking to? Before she could even comprehend, she felt her heart break, a feminine voice breaking out from behind the door "Great, now hurry up, we've got a lot to do till she comes back." Recoiling from the door, she staggered in the spot, still in shock. Unsure of what else to do, she quickly pulled her phone out

"You're saying Y/N's cheating on you?" Danielle exclaimed, her eyes immediately darting to Hanni and Minji, the both of their lips tightly pursed, but from the corner of Haerin's eyes, she saw Hyein, smirking, before wiping it off her face swiftly. "There was someone else in the house...that I wasn't told about. Y/N's hiding something..." She whispered "Haerin ah, I don't think Y/N would do that, we've all seen how much they love you, I don't think they'd do that to you!" Minji chimed in, Hanni and Danielle nodding in agreement, Haerin slowly nodding too. You wouldn't do this to her... "I guess I'll head back to Y/N's place now, clear things up." Haerin said, reaching over to grab her bag before Minji yanked it out of reach, Haerin confused by the rather defensive act made by Minji "Why don't you take a short break? Maybe freshen up before meeting Y/N!" She rapid fired, seemingly blabbering, Haerin looking confused at why her members were acting so weird, but shaking it off, nodded, heading to take a shower. As soon as Haerin was out of sight, Hanni immediately ran to Hyein, lightly slapping her on the shoulder. "You almost blew it!" She chided, Hyein smiling goofily as the other 3 sighed "Well, it's going to be a really special birthday for her..." Danielle said, the other 3 chuckling

Taking a deep breath, Haerin barged through your door, eyes slammed shut in fear of what she would see. Opening her eyes slowly, she stumbled back in shock at what she was seeing. "Happy birthday my love!" You exclaimed, a bouquet of roses in your hand, a romantic dinner on your dining table. Suddenly, everything clicked in Haerin's head. Hyein smirking, why the girls were so cavalier about you having another girl over. They knew!

Quashing a light feeling of betrayal, Haerin rushed at you, jumping into your arms and throwing you into a big hug. "Don't scare me like that again!" Haerin muttered into your neck, as you looked at her confused "What do you-" You could only ask before Haerin buried her face into your neck. "Wait, did you think I was cheating on you?" You questioned, as you felt a little moistness from Haerin's eyes, feeling her nod. Pulling her into a bridal carry, you brought her to the couch, resting her on your chest as you felt her snuggle into you "I'd never cheat on you my precious goyangi." You lightly rubbed your nose onto her forehead, as she felt her cheeks heat up and turn red "Happy birthday my love."

A/N: This is kinda rushed, but I just wanted to post something for Haerin's birthday, so here it is, little late but wishing the best girl a happy birthday

#fluff #rd0265667 #haerin #haerin x reader #kang haerin x reader #newjeans x reader #newjeans haerin #haerin fanfic #kang haerin fanfic #new jeans kang haerin fanfic

[trulytiredhermit]

You had been following up with the Linked universe comic for quite some time, you liked the Links' designs, the story, and everything it has to offer.

Stayed ever since the first part came out, you knew a lot about these characters even if you haven't played their game yet.

So what do you feel when you've woken up to a different world and meet the chain hours later?

Happiness of course! You get to meet the Links whose story in the comic you've been following since day one! You've got a lot of questions! But first, befriend them! Why would they tell you shit when they know you, right?

Oh wait that's too much.. Hahah.. Your curiosity is finally satiated, but at what cost?

They won't let you go.

oooooh!! Interesting!

Reader finding themselves in a new world and just going: Welp, guess this is my life now…. Oh neat people that look familiar…. Wait

But honestly I can fully see this connecting to you other ask and I might just combine them because now I got some thoughts in mind about an isekaid reader who knows about the games/Linked Universe comics but also knows they can't just outright fan over the Chain or spout off their many questions right off the bat.

So adding this ask in to this post as well then!

Okay so my first thought when reading these both was what if, on top of all of this, Reader didn't meet the Chain at first and realize where they were from seeing them, but like what if they saw Beedle or another prominent character in the Zelda franchise and THAT'S how they realized.

Then having rational thoughts, Reader knew they couldn't exactly go roaming about given how dangerous some of the Zelda games can be, especially for a modern Reader who wouldn't know how to use half the weapons available to them (especially if they got dropped in Hyrule's or Wild's world).

So Reader takes up a job and lands a place to stay, just trying to keep on getting by while figuring out what the heck happened and constantly hoping they'd get to see the Link of the world they got dropped into since they do be a simp.

Lo and behold one day while working they come across the group as you had put it and their mind implodes as they come to the startling realization that not only are they in the Zelda world but in the LINKED UNIVERSE COMIC WORLD!!

cue internal fanning and simping galore!

Like for example let's say Reader got dropped into Wild's Hyrule, met Beedle who brought them to one of the Stables and they then cut a deal with the stable owner that if they let them stay there and gave them meals, they'd work for the stable association doing whatever whilst doing odd jobs for travelers to make money on the side.

Then one day whilst airing out the bedding and the sheets they catch sight of a very familiar looking man with long blonde hair pulled into a long pony tail wearing a striking blue shirt and was also followed around by a shorter blonde ALSO wearing a familiar blue shirt.

.....and Reader just happens to overhear their names which were Wild and Wind....

So of course, Reader, upon realizing what's going on and who they are, tries to subtly get closer to the group because they are simping so hard right now, but they also try to be respectful and maintain their distance (as hard as it is) since they don't want to make the more cautious members of the group too suspicious of them.

Already too late since the stable owner and Beedle was telling the Chain about the mysterious worker they gained/person they found who had no background and was dressed in odd clothes and always seemed to hum strange songs that no one's heard of before.

So the Chain start trying to get closer to Reader to, trying to find out where they're from and what their story is while also keeping their respectful distance because they don't want to tip them off into being suspicious about them.

As the days pass and Reader and the Chain end up spending more time together and getting closer and closer, the truth comes out/one of the group realizes that Reader isn't from this world, isn't from ANY of their Hyrules.

But now there's a problem, because if they had known this before getting close to Reader they surely would have easily helped them find their way back home.

However now?

Now when they've gotten so close, shared laughs and stories, stayed up late with Reader around the stable campfire and spoke about deep topics, when they've had Reader comfort them and wake them from some of their nightmares without alerting the other patrons or godforbid the other members of the chain...

Well, they no longer feel the urge to be heroic and help Reader get home.

They just feel a selfish desire to keep Reader with them, to keep those bouts of laugher, fun times, and intimacy all to themselves and to never let it go.

*but no really I kinda wanna write a little one shot about this now*

#trulytiredhermit #chromonomatic #yandere lu x reader #linked universe x reader #linked universe

[rorywritesjunk]

(Birdie will get a post like this once more of her story comes out. Also this got long on accident so it gets a cut. It's Buggy having some self doubt as always. But we've also seen Buggy as an adult with Sunny so he kind of grows out of this self doubt with his relationship)

Buggy isn't really feeling it when his birthday rolls around. He got a little too drunk at Sunny's birthday two months previously, made a comment about how hot the barmaid was and wondered what she looked like underneath those clothes, out loud mind you, in front of Sunny, and even though he apologized profusely and she forgave him, he still felt terrible about it.

And it was the day before his birthday and Sunny insisted he needed to drop her off at this certain village for the day which he did. He would do anything for her to make up how he acted. He gave her whatever berry he had as well, insisting she treat herself ("Honey, it's your birthday tomorrow" she said as she tried to hand it back to him. "Yea, well, then buy me something nice!" He insisted as he refused the money.)

And Sunny was gone almost all day. Buggy was worried, not that something happened to her but what if she... Just got tired of him and left?

She was so specific that it had to be this island she goes to on this particular day, the day before his birthday. Was it planned? Was his birthday present a divorce after almost two years of marriage? He felt it would be justified. Sunny would be better off marrying someone else anyways.

So he decided to celebrate early with a bottle of rum with himself. He shut himself away in the bedroom with it, figuring he was alone now that the love of his life decided she was tired of him.

He was halfway through the bottle when the door opened and he heard the sweetest sound: her voice.

"I'm back! I got things to make you dinner tomorrow." Sunny told him as she shut the door. "And your birthday present, of course."

When she saw him sitting on the ground, back to the bed as he slumped forward, she paused for a moment. "Buggy?"

"I thought you were gonna leave me." He sniffled. "I'm a terrible husband."

Sunny sighed and walked over to him, taking the bottle of rum out of his hands and moving it out of reach. "That's enough of that. Anyway, you'll never guess who I ran into in town, Buggy. I saw Kuro again! He dresses so sharp, you know. I like to think I can have bragging rights over helping pirate captains with their wardrobes."

Buggy could only listen, feeling more and more miserable. Of course Sunny would meet someone she knew. She knew as many pirates as Buggy but she got along with them (even if some asked to marry her). Kuro being in town was another stab in Buggy's heart. She was going to leave him for Kuro.

"Hey, do you want your present now or tomorrow?" Sunny asked as she turned to look at Buggy. He wasn't paying attention to her, which was a surprise. She walked back over and knelt down in front of him. "Honey, what's wrong?"

"My birthday is tomorrow and you're divorcing me!" Buggy whined. "I'm a terrible husband, I don't deserve you! You-You're leaving me for Kuro, aren't you?

"Wait, what? No!" Sunny stared at him in shock. "Why would you think that?!"

"B-Because you wanted to come here and- and he is better looking than me!" Buggy's hand grabbed the rum and brought it back over to him. He took a few more large gulps before Sunny managed to pull it away from him again.

"I'm not divorcing you!" Sunny insisted. "Buggy, is this about my birthday?" He nodded and grabbed the bottle back from her. Sunny sighed. "Honey, I told you it was fine. It was a dumb thing but that's not the dumbest thing you've done or said around me." She gave up trying to take the bottle from him, instead choosing to stand up and step back from him. "I wanted to come to this island to get to this town for a specific reason. Kuro was just a surprise."

"D'you think he's more handsome than me?" Buggy sniffled. Sunny rolled her eyes and sighed.

"Kuro is handsome, honey, but I think you're more attractive than him." Sunny told him. "Now, I'm going to show you your birthday present, okay, because maybe you'll calm down."

Buggy rubbed his eyes and looked up at her as tears streamed down his cheeks. This was it. She was going to do something dramatic like take off her wedding ring and throw it down at him, laugh about how she would go off with someone else. To his surprise and relief, she did no such thing. Instead, Sunny pulled her shirt off and turned to show him her shoulder.

Her skin was still swollen, a little bruised, but his jolly roger was clear as day, inked onto her right shoulder forever. It was shiny from the ointment, a little irritated from her shirt even, but it was there. Buggy's jaw dropped and he stood up way too fast, the alcohol hitting him and causing him to lose his balance and fall against her. Thankfully she caught him, steadying him on his feet as he reached up to touch the tattoo.

"You can't touch it, honey." She said as she pushed his hand down gently. "Not yet, anyways. It needs a few weeks to heal."

"You're not divorcing me?" Buggy managed to ask, voice wavering as he looked up at her with large, watery eyes.

"No, Buggy, I'm not divorcing you." Sunny kissed him on his forehead. "Don't think like that, okay? I wanted to surprise you with this because I love you so much and want you to know I'm committed to you. You're the only one I want."

He dropped the bottle of rum and threw his arms around her, tears gone as he hugged her tightly. "I love you sooooo much, Sunny babe! So much, you have no idea! And and you got me tattooed on you, that means you're going to love me forever, right?"

"Yes, yes, I'm going to love you forever because I got this tattooed on me." Sunny chuckled as she hugged him back. "Now, get yourself cleaned up for dinner. I need to get started on it."

Buggy held onto the hug for a moment longer, wanting to let her words sink in. She loved him, wasn't leaving him, and she would love him forever. For him, that was the best birthday gift.

#buggy the clown #mini fic #buggy the clown x reader #sunny x buggy #buggy x reader #buggy x you #buggy the clown x you #opla buggy the clown #opla buggy the clown x reader #opla buggy x reader #opla buggy the clown x you #opla buggy #opla buggy x you #buggy the clown x oc #buggy x oc #opla buggy the clown x oc #opla buggy x oc

[neonbrutalism]

RIP Dead Guy (working title)

Unfinished WIP time.... there's a lot more to this but too many scene gaps to post officially, so here's the first bit for the Tumblrerers.

(Speculative Post-BTSV in which Miguel O'Hara of Earth 928B dies saving the multiverse and defeating the Spot. The Society is in mourning and the Spider-Gang is forced to reckon with their feelings. Complicating matters is that Peter's brought back another Miguel from the multiverse who is obviously not comfortable with how they're projecting all this on to him.)

Why hadn’t Miguel put a chair at his work station? 

Peter cracked his back and peered again at the the symbols on the glowing, orange screens, trying to make sense of whatever organizational system Miguel was using. 

Had used.

Dammit.

He didn’t want to bother LYLA anymore with this. She’d been subdued for weeks – well, almost everyone had been – and Peter wasn’t sure how long AI took to mourn. She did her scans and ran numbers, sure, but it was all without any … snap. 

Peter didnt think she was, well, aware enough to grieve… but he also didn’t think Miguel would put her mourning his death in to her programming. Hell, Peter was pretty sure Miguel wouldn’t have wanted anyone to mourn him at all, the stupid, stubborn, broken bastard. If only Peter had moved faster, had recognized what was about to happen…

But maybe it wouldn’t have changed anything. He saw Miguel’s face at that last moment, before…

There was nothing else for it.

“Hey, LYLA?” 

“Yes, Peter?” LYLA appeared next to him, expression unnaturally blank. 

“Sorry to … bother you? I’m just trying to, uh—“ Peter gestured at the orange screens, “I can’t make webs or tails of this.”

He paused, waiting for a reaction. None came. Miguel wouldn’t have reacted either.

“Anyway, uh, I keep seeing this symbol on certain earths? Looks like a… U?”

“A closed eye,” said LYLA, “After the incident, Miguel cut off any viewing access to mapped earths with… other versions of himself.”

“… Oh,” said Peter, slowly,”I guess he, what, didn’t want the temptation?”

LYLA’s eyes narrowed at Peter, “If you think it would have been tempting for him after what hapoened, you didn’t know him as well as you think you did.”

“Uh. Sorry?”

“Is that all, Peter?”

“Yeah, uh. I guess so. Th—“

LYLA vanished before he could finish thanking her.

Peter shook the interaction off and returned to the screen. He touched the closed-eye symbol. The system pop-up counted 793 locked earths. More than Peter was expecting – but maybe that wasn’t a crazy number, since there seemed to be tens or even hundreds of thousands of Peter Parkers. Had Miguel locked them all manually, or had LYLA done it automatically as their map of the multiverse expanded? 

In the corner of the pop up, there was an Unlock All button. 

He shouldn’t. 

Miguel had once told him, when he asked about seeing versions of Aunt May or Harry, that the only thing that spending time watching the dead live without you in another world was good for was torturing yourself.

Ha. Maybe if Peter had remembered to point out the irony if him saying that, Miguel wouldn’t have…

Fuck it. Whatever. Miguel wasn’t here to tell Peter not to. Miguel was just a miserable, guilt-ridden, self-loathing, dead hypocrite and… and Peter wanted to see his friend again.

He pressed the lock. There was a buzz of haptic feedback and all at once, the eye icons blinked open and Peter found himself looking at dozens of versions of a dead man’s face. 

Plenty of them were scowling, wiping blood off their faces after pulling their masks off or boredly picking at paperwork in an office or laboratory. Mostly they were just familiar in a way that felt like a punch in the gut. Stretched all the way out, slouching in a chair looking crabby or curled in with their hands hooked around the back of their necks, poorly dealing with some emotion or stress or another. Some of them, though, looked … happy. Or, at least they looked happier than Peter had ever seen Miguel, outside of those few weeks he’d spent with Gabriella. He didn’t see any versions of her, though. But still, at least there were some versions that weren’t alone.

One Miguel was standing looking out of a large broken window, expression dark and triumphant while a pretty, asian woman in a lab coat and inexplicably a pair of high top sneakers from 1993 curled her arm around his waist and smiled. Peter decided he didn’t want to know what they looked so happy about. 

A teenaged version of Miguel and a girl – maybe a younger version of that woman in the lab coat – with her hair in purple pom-poms, sat in a bedroom. The girl pulled out a box from under her bed, revealing what looked to be a lot of ancient Star Trek merchandise, smiling like she was a little embarrassed. Peter pushed that node aside too, he didn’t want to intrude on that.

A pink haired woman covered in chitin and with a thousand needle teeth hovered in the air on vibrating wasp wings and chatted happily while Miguel in his spider-suit listened, sitting on the edge of a tall building. Behind them, the sky was dark and filled with pistons and girders – Downtown Nueva York.

And speaking of Downtown Nueva York – an explosion caught Peter’s eye. He pulled the node forward – Miguel, in a different mask but it could hardly be anyone else, was fighting, his suit torn and bloody, not flickering with broken light like the suit Peter knew. Someone else – some kind of cyborg or robot, slammed a whirling metal thresher down on the spot Miguel had been lying less than a second earlier. He was losing the fight. 

Okay, calm down, Peter. Miguel was tough and could take a lot of hits  – he just needed a chance to recover. Miguel, no matter the dimension, was perfectly capable of surviving – until he wasn’t. 

Behind the cyborg … A Green Goblin rose up on his glider, bombs in hand. Miguel looked up at the Goblin and Peter was through the portal to Earth 416647 before he could stop himself.

(UNFINISHED FIGHT SCEEEENE!)

Peter stared.

This Miguel looked a little younger — or maybe just got more sleep. He was less gaunt, less haunted. Less like he hadn’t eaten or drank in weeks. His hair was little reidder, messy from his mask, curls hanging over his forehead. He had a small scar across his upper lip that the original Miguel hadn’t had either.

Peter realized he’d been staring too long only when Miguel took an awkward step back from him and exchanged a quick, nervous look with the now unmasked Green Goblin. He looked a lot like Miguel too.

Oh… this was Gabriel — his brother. Miguel had mentioned him once or twice. Peter was pretty sure the Original Miguel’s brother was dead — but then again, he’d never really asked.

“Uh — sorry, I’m. Spider-Man.”

“We know,” said Miguel.

“You said that already,” said Goblin.

Peter was struck with a terrible idea. One of his worst. But … the society hadn’t been the same in the past few weeks. A dark cloud had come over it and Peter wasn’t sure how to get it to pass. The fact was, nervous breakdown in the last couple of days notwithstanding, just about everyone had liked Miguel. He’d been their leader, he’d taken care of them and listened and tried to help them. They’d all loved him … 

Not that Miguel would have ever believed that in a hundred years.

But without Miguel, things were kind of falling apart. Not literally, LYLA ran the place like clockwork, but emotionally. Miguel could de-escalate petty arguments and fights that broke out better than any Peter Parker could (because most of the arguments involved at least one other Peter Parker). But now, arguments festered, problems went unresolved and still, every time that Peter went to the cafeteria, he almost picked up some empanadas before he remembered himself.

Maybe … a familiar face would help everyone move on? Or at least return a sense of normalcy until people got used to the idea that Miguel, their Miguel, was gone.

“Right! Right – um,” shit, how had Miguel done this ‘I’m from another dimension’ shpiel? “I’m from another dimension! I’m part of a – uh, strike team? Thing? It’s a few hundred other Spider-People and we travel around the multiverse to help people! And stop anomalies — wait, no, we don’t do that anymore. So just the helping people. That’s why I came to help you fight — well I guess you didn’t need help, you two weren’t fighting – but it’s cool! We have a headquarters! And a cafeteria and a gym. Just … amenities. You should come check it out. Miguel should – uh. No offense, Mr. Goblin, but a Spider-Society is kind of. Spider-centric.”

“Wow,” said Gabriel in a familiar flat tone, “I’m devastated but I think I’ll survive.” 

“Pass,” said Miguel. He turned to leave. 

“Wait!” said Peter, “I’m underselling it. I promise, it’s … really cool. Super elite.”

Miguel raised a skepical eyebrow, “Super elite with ‘a couple hundred’ people?”

“There’s a bazillion different universe, so I mean, it’s all relative.”

Miguel pulled his mask back down over his face, “Yeah, still pass.”

Miguel fwizzed a strand of web (pale, organic, not like the glowing orange Peter was familiar with) to the upper corner of the building and the Goblin kicked his glider’s power on. 

“Wait! Please!” said Peter, his voice breaking a little, “just – just come see it? And then you can come right back! Please?”

The lenses on Miguel’s mask squinted at Peter and then he sighed, “Fine. Okay – Gabri, will you tell Xina I’m …” 

“Being kidnapped by a time traveller?” 

“Dimensional traveller.”

“Whatever,” said Miguel, waving his brother off, “I’ll be home later.”

Gabriel gave a lazy salute and sped off on his glider.

Peter opened the portal to 928.

Miguel — this new, other Miguel — eyed it suspiciously, then stepped through.

#Miguel O'Hara #Across the Spider-Verse #WIP #fanfiction #beyond the spider-verse #Gabriel's here and Xina's in the background :D

[sunghun]

enhypen as your best friend

requested; yep :p

warnings; mentions of food in jay and niki’s, minor mention of bullying in sunghoon’s

note; this took me so long to write 😭😭writer’s block is truly a bitch, but hopefully i’ll be posting more often in the near future!!

희승 - heeseung;

for some reason i see him as being that low-key annoying hipster friend

that you lovingly put up with <3

has a song for you to listen for literally every occasion

he’s also the friend that makes you wonder how he even survives

bc you swear he just never sleeps??

you could text him at any time

and he always answers within a few minutes

so either he has some kind of sixth sense for when you wanna talk to him

or he has no life and is always awake waiting for you to message him

and ofc you like to tease him about it

“wow heeseung i didn’t know you were so obsessed with me”

“well i can’t let you have another breakdown at 3am by yourself now can i”

touché

you guys also go on lots of platonic ‘dates’

so many midnight coffee runs

and you’ll just sit on a bench in some park and talk until the sun is coming up

the best friend that’s always there for you

제이 - jay;

the grandpa friend <3

always complains about being out too late

scolds you if you do anything dangerous

impromptu lectures on life even tho he’s like the same age as you

but you know he only does it bc he cares <3

if you’re nervous about doing smth he’ll immediately offer to do it with you or for you

but also encourages you to go out on your own and do things for yourself :))

likes to use you as his “guinea pig” when testing out a new recipe for something

which you honestly don’t mind bc his cooking is just chef’s kiss tbh

definitely the friend who just buys stuff for you

“here.”

“what’s this?”

“that necklace i saw you looking at in the store for like 5 minutes”

he’s low-key kinda tsundere about it sometimes tho

“hey y/n what do you want?”

“oh no i’m good i didn’t bring any money.”

“did i ask if you brought money?”

“but-“

“What Do You Want?”

so yeah

even if he’s a lil rough around the edges

at the end of the day you both know that you’d do anything for each other

the best friend you can always count on

제이크 - jake;

being besties with jake means you question why you’re friends with such a dumbass

legit has the humor of a 12 year old boy like the amount of stupid memes he sends you…

rip my dude

but he’s also the sweetest guy you know so!!

i guess that evens it out

comes over so often he practically lives at ur house

like he just worms his way into your family so subtly

suddenly it’s not a complete family reunion if jake isn’t there

but you also like to hangout at coffee shops/cafes!!

especially the aesthetic looking ones

ur number 1 hypeman

takes the best pics of you for ur social media

“yes y/n! work it bro!”

lots of sleepovers where you’ll stay up watching movies or playing video games until the sun is coming up

you guys probably volunteer at a pet shelter too

and you have to talk jake out of adopting every single dog there almost daily

even if you don’t physically see each other every day

you still text and call each other every day

bc the two of really are like family to each other

the best friend that makes you feel loved no matter what

성훈 - sunghoon;

to this day people still wonder how you and sunghoon are friends

bc like. you’re just so opposite??

plus when you first met you both hated each other

and for literally no reason too

but one day you guys found out there was some dickhead bully at school that you both hated more than you hated each other

like they’re just talking shit about you until suddenly sunghoon walks up and starts defending you?? like what universe did you land in

but anyways ever since then you two got closer and now you’re bffs

people mistake you for a couple all the time mostly bc you’re the only person sunghoon will allow to hold his hand

he isn’t the most affectionate person but if you are he’ll begrudgingly allow you to cuddle up to him when you watch a movie

is so so so observant

which means he always gets you the best gifts

lots of hanging out at the mall bc you both enjoy people watching

so you’ll usually get some coffee and then just sit on a bench and rate people’s outfits

when you guys first started hanging out sunghoon was pretty shy

but the more you got to know each other the more he came out of his shell

and now he tends to match ur energy <3

the best friend that always understands you

선우 - sunoo;

the best bff you ask for

literally the first person you tell anything to

if you’re there you can bet sunoo isn’t far off

the two of you haven’t gone a day without speaking since you became friends

and you both love making fun of each other

all in the name of love, ofc <3

lots of good natured bickering and fake arguing

you guys go on lots of walks and like to have little picnics

and weekly movie/drama nights are definitely a thing

where sunoo will catch you up on the latest rumors and gossip around school during the boring parts of whatever you’re watching

you two also call each other pet names a lot

whether it be normal ones like babe or weird, over the top ones like snuggle bunny-poo

he also likes to randomly surprise you with flowers every once in a while

just because <3

you guys know everything about each other and know that you can always trust the other with your secrets

the best friend that you sometimes wish was more

정원 - jungwon;

is basically ur adopted sibling whether you like it or not

he can either be your favorite person or the person u loathe the most

he lives next door so you both are at each other’s house constantly

and your mom may or may not low-key like him more 3

which he loves to rub in ur face /3

but it’s okay bc maeumi likes you more <3

which you love to rub in his face <33

you both like to go on ‘adventures’ whether it’s going to mcdonald’s at 3 am

or exploring the woods by your house in the middle of the day with a backpack that only has a couple juice boxes and some fruit snacks in it

you also build pillow forts in rooms all the time!!

bc it makes the sleepover experience 10x better, can confirm

he’s always the first person you send the weird videos you find late at night to, and vice versa

and you both love to give each other random little gifts from time to time even if they seem really weird to other people

sooooo many inside jokes

the best friend that you know you’ll always have

니키 - niki;

literally the most annoying person u know

u call him brat affectionately <3

and he calls you his grandparent not affectionately 3 (jk jk)

bc even if you’re the same age or younger than him

i can assure you he is going to tease you about your age/the way you act

also you both will occasionally ghost each other for a few weeks

like sometimes to the point where ppl wonder if you’re still even friends

but when they ask ur like “wdym we’re literally bffs??”

and then continue to talk like nothing ever happened

you guys make fun of each other all. the. time.

lovingly of course, but still

like you guys will be at a thrift shop or smth

and riki will find the most horrendous looking stuffed animal there and buy it

and when you ask him why he got such an ugly thing he’ll just be like

“bc it reminded me of you! ^-^”

jokes on him tho bc a few weeks go by and suddenly he can’t sleep without it so

also lots of park hangouts in the evenings!!

especially in the summer like you guys will get some ice cream or popsicles and just hang out at a playground

pushing each other on the swings or seeing how long you both can hang on the monkey bars

the best friend that makes you feel like you never have to grow up

taglist: @mochisnlix @yizhoutv @heatrache @vantxx95 @enhacolor @sunoo-bby @ilandsghost @hiqhkey

#k-shop net #enhypen imagines #enhypen x gender neutral reader #enhypen x reader #enhypen reactions #enhypen scenarios #enhypen headcanons #enhypen fluff #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen x you

[hexitca]

Rant about Puritan fandom culture!

Well I typed it on twitter but then I had more to say so tumblr it is!

Under read more

WARNING: Long as fuck

Here's some pics

I know I basically said the author of Heartstopper "brought it on themselves" but yea they kinda did.

You can disagree with BL/Yaoi you can hate the shipping discourse or shipping in fandom in general but you cant frame it in a "i hate [that] bc it's sinful/fetishistic and I'M ABOVE THAT BC I'M WHOLESOME AND BETTER THAN THOSE DISGUSTING SHIPPERS"

bc that's gonna bite you in the ass...as it is doing now. The fucking image of their character's google history is so tame and normal, esp in LGBTQ+ spaces! Yet they are being called a pedo? Crazy. In the end, you only hurt yourself!

I never bothered with HS bc i just wasnt interested in it but thats just my preference. It's sad to see ppl, esp young ppl, turn on a series of LGBTQ+ representation just bc of the author's past (or current? idk) stance on the BL/Yaoi or MLM or whatever genre just bc their stance wavered a bit in a simple comic image. Something that is so fucking normal also! but they will grow up and realized how limiting it is to restrict themselves just to appear pure within a group.

Yet the artists/writers/creators are traumatized by the witchhunt. I know I said the author brought it on themselves for supporting anti but damn I don't want them being accused of being a pedo! Or ANYTHING! NO ONE DESERVES THAT. I dont know anything about the author other than surface knowledge but at the end of the day, all this online shit, doesnt matter. It doesnt! Me saying that is ironic bc im typing this post up right now!

but it's something we care about! I care about fandom spaces, I care that creators are getting attack for something as mild as this even if they invited these ppl into their circle. We're human and we change our views a million times a fucking day. I could agree with one thing and disagree with it another. That's why anti discourse pisses me the hell off! It's just a bunch of bullies looking to make themselves feel better by shaming others! I don't respect that type of behavior. And I hate that they just run around saying shit like "kys" over a two characters fucking?!? It amazes me beyond words.

Fandom has never been without its discourse. But the puritan bullshit is not even fandom discourse, it's just straight up bullying and harassment. It doesnt take much to tailor your fandom spaces to your preferences, i should know ive been in fandom spaces since I was fucking 13 years old. I didn't explore nsfw/porn/anything until I wanted to when I was 18. That is MY personal experience. I never put that on anyone else BUT MYSELF. If I saw nsfw and didnt want to see it I blocked the person. Not make a fucking witch hunt out of it. You are in charge of keeping YOURSELF in check not some person who shared nsfw art/fanfic. How fucking hard is it to turn the "don't show me nsfw" toggle on??? Bc it's not about that. Y'all just wanna be mad and be above someone so why not ppl minding their own business.

And guess what? There ARE ppl who are bad and support nsfw art/writing. They fucking suck. They are outliers and deserve to be called out when they get exposed. But many times, ppl always go "see i told you all the ppl in THAT fandom were pedos/freaks/etc" hmmm sounds like when conservatives go "see...that queer person turned out to be bad, SO all queer ppl are bad" DO YOU GET IT?? It never works out with that line of thinking. You are harming innocent ppl minding their own business. You are harming yourselves when you grow the fuck up and realize that "OH actually...I am curious about sex" and have ppl who you thought were your friends eat your face. PLS wake the fuck up.

If you're an anti:

I hope you recover from that

go fuck yourself

if you're offended by me saying "go fuck yourself", pls take that as a sign to log off the internet and go touch grass. As someone who has done that many of times, it's very refreshing.

#fandom #fandom culture #fandom discourse #purity culture #i might go touch some grass for the rest of the week/weekend holy shit #this is why i try not to be on twitter a lot bc tumblr im at least in my own spaces with minor breaches of stupidity #twitter it just throws it in on my tl and i get fucking triggered and angry #ill be taking a long break from twitter holy shit

[i-luv-carl-grimes]

☾꙳all the things I hate about you☀︎꙳

꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳

Chandler Riggs x Fem! Reader

You alr know the summary I don't feel like writing it again

Warnings: swearing

꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳꙳

It had been 2 months and 3 weeks had passed which only leaves me 1 week before I move, I walked around my house the one I had lived in for my whole life, the was once filled with furniture and decorations and a full family was now empty with boxes scattered around and a 2 person family. "Y/n? Are you alright?" my mom asked me. "Yeah, it just feels weird leaving ya know," I said and she put her hand on my shoulder. "I'm so proud of you," she said and I nodded, she then took her hand off and went to her room.

I’ll miss it here, I decided to go to the old abandoned park I found when I was younger, back then I didn’t have many friends but I didn't care, if I’m being honest being alone brought me more comfort than being with someone, I guess it’s just what I was used to.

after I put on a simple outfit told my mom I was leaving and off I went listening to music as I made my way to the overgrown park, it looked just as beautiful as I did in the summer, only this time the leaves were colors of red and orange.  sitting down on one of the old swings still surprised they didn't snap, only to realize the song that had been playing.  a line without a hook by Ricky Montgomery, that song was always so relatable, I guess it was the feeling of always being alone at least that’s how I took it.  my phone lit up as Chandler posted on his Twitter once more.  

@/chandlerrings

(it was just a photo of the trees turning)

I put my phone on my lap and took a deep breath of the cold crisp air.  then a small smile formed on my lips as the email the changed my whole life, I don’t think I’ve ever experienced so many emotions at once.  All though I’m an actor I’m not that emotional at all, at least that’s what F/n always said.  She has always talked for me too, I didn’t mind it though, in fact, it took the stress of having to talk to people, something I knew I wasn’t good at which scars me the most.  What if I embarrassed myself in front of probably one of the best actors EVER, I looked down at my nails to see that 3 more were bloody.  

before I knew it the sky turned to a beautiful pink, and for a moment I felt calm only to realize that once again I had spent the whole day alone, as always.  With that thought, I got up and walked home.  “welcome back it’s been a while since you went to that old park” my mom said and I just nodded and walked to my room.  I grabbed my phone to see yet another notification with a familiar name but this time it was Instagram

@/Chandlerringgs followed you

I practically threw my phone across the room when I saw a dm from him, my thumb hovered over the notification, I tightly closed my eyes and clicked on it, and slowly opened my eyes.  

@/chandlerriggs

I don’t think it’s smart to put the state you live in on your bio

what

I stared at the message and questioned what he was talking about, I didn't even bother to respond I mean what am I supposed to say to that?! I couldn’t tell if he was joking, giving me advice, or making fun of me 

he wouldn’t do that...right? 

#carl grimes #carl the walking dead #the walking dead #twd carl #carl x reader #the walking dead fanfiction #twd x reader #x reader #chandler riggs #chandler riggs x reader #twd fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic #the walking dead x reader

[koolkat9]

Out of Sight

Based on an idea that has been rolling around in my head for awhile and that was finally brought out by this post by @sunnylolli. 

Rating: T

Relationship: England + Canada

Word Count: 910

Read on AO3

Matthew saw things. For as long as he could remember. Long before he ever met Arthur or even Papa. It started as tiny lights, dancing in the air. Papa had said those were fireflies, but Matthew knew better. One time, Matthew caught the light, cupping it in his hands. Pudgy fingers opened to reveal a little girl with beady blue eyes and wings like a dragonfly. She looked terrified.

“Je suis désolé mademoiselle,” Matthew sputtered, opening his hands wider so the little lady could get out. He left the lights alone after that.

Then there was the time he got pulled under by the undertow. The specifics were blurry, but he remembered a woman’s face, many sea creatures wrapped in her hair, her skin littered with scales. When he came to, he was on the shore, all alone. He had shouted a thank you to the sea, having a feeling that whoever saved him resided there. He never saw her again.

But the scariest was the shadowy figure that stood in the corner of his room every now and then. Sometimes it looked like a bear, sometimes an owl, sometimes a wolf. Its eyes glowed white within the darkness. At first, he thought it was a nightmare, but it kept coming back. Papa couldn’t see it, though he got this grave look on his face whenever Matthew mentioned it to him. So Matthew kept quiet. After all, it wasn’t like the shadow did anything threatening, and it only showed up every few months.

Years went by, and Papa left. Why he had to leave Matthew didn’t fully understand, but Arthur was nice and didn’t mind taking him on walks even if it was muddy or getting down on the grass with him to roll around.

Arthur saw things too. Some things Matthew didn’t even see. And yet, Matthew couldn’t bring himself to mention the creatures to Arthur.

He was just about to fall asleep when he heard shuffling. He tried to pay it no mind, his brain too close to sleep to process the possible danger. But then he felt something warm wash over his face. He cracked his eyes open, and sure enough, two glowing eyes stared into him.

Matthew screamed, and the shadow creature stumbled back. Taking the chance, he rushed into Arthur’s room bawling. Arthur jerked awake, springing up from his bed. “Matthew? Matthew…what’s the matter darling?”

“Th-There’s…In my room…I-I don’t...It was there and–”

“Slow down. Shhhh. It’s going to be okay. How about you show me?”

Matthew shook his head ‘no.’ He couldn’t go back into that room.

“Oh come now. Surely it was just a nightmare.”

He was just like Papa. ‘It’s just in your head mon chou.’ ‘Go to sleep, and it’ll disappear.’ ‘It was just a dream, Matthieu.’

“It’s there,” Matthew screamed at the top of his lungs, “It’s been there over and over and over. And it’s gotten closer and–”

“Matthew we do not raise our–”

“You’re just like Papa. No one ever believes me.”

“Matthew, do not--”

But Matthew was already rushing to the door only to meet the shadow, shaped like a man towering over him.

“I am talking to you young–” Arthur made a strangled noise at the back of his throat as he stared at the figure. “Matthew…Get behind me.”

Matthew didn’t need to be asked twice. He skittered behind Arthur, gripping his nightgown and burying his face into the fabric. Arthur muttered something under his breath. Latin if he had to guess, but it didn’t sound like anything he had heard before. He smooshed his face even more into the fabric until he was pressing against Arthur’s leg.

There was crackling, then something hot, and then a hand in his hair that kept Matthew planted in place once everything was over. “It’s alright poppet,” Arthur panted, “It’s all gone now.”

“Mmm…”

Arthur crouched down, peeling Matthew off and looking him in the eye. He thumbed away Matthew’s tears. “I’m sorry for not believing you lad. I…I never thought I’d find another like me outside of my brothers. But I should have believed you, and I’m sorry.”

Matthew sniffed, wiping his nose with his sleeve.

“You don’t have to worry about that thing again,” Arthur went on, “I took care of it.”

Matthew bit his lip, looking around the room. The shadow was gone, but he didn’t want to go back to his room. He didn’t want to ask though. He had already bugged Arthur so much.

“There’s something on your mind,” Arthur noted, “Out with it.”

Matthew tensed. His eyes drifted to his feet. “Um…C-Can…Can…Can I…sleep with you?”

Arthur smiled gently, collecting Matthew into his arms. “Of course dear. As long as you agree to talk to me about that sight of yours in the morning.”

“Okay.”

They settled under the covers, Arthur ensuring Matthew was wrapped up nice and tight so the chill of the night couldn’t dig into them. “Comfy and cozy?” Arthur asked, laying down beside him.

“Mhm.” Matthew’s eyes were already starting to close.

Arthur carded a hand through Matthew’s hair. “Good. Sleep well, love.”

“Night…Daddy…” The words were heavy on Matthew's tongue but it felt right.

Arthur’s breath hitched, grip tightening for a moment. Just as Matthew drifted off, Arthur placed a kiss on his forehead and pulled him against his chest. Matthew happily snuggled up for a good night's sleep, knowing as long as Arthur--his dad--was there, he would be okay.

Info About the Folklore Used The first is obviously fairies

The second folklore creature Matthew met is The Sea Goddess of Inuit folklore. You can learn more about her here: http://www.thecanadianencyclopedia.ca/en/article/the-goddess-of-the-sea-the-story-of-sedna

And the third folklore creature I took some liberties with. It’s somewhat based on loup-garou (French/French-Canadian version of a werewolf, though some stories depict them as changing into other animals instead of a wolf), but they didn’t exactly fit the scene I wanted to depict them in so I decided to make up a creature but base it off an already existing creature.

#hetalia #royal red bros #hws england #hws canada #hurt/comfort #magical creatures #fanfiction #hetalia fanfiction #my writing

[moonlarked]

opinions on the council, especially the no-family rule because it pisses me off (for the rant thing)

ok!! Well, I already talked about how I thought the Council is a pretty messed up form of leadership in my other post, but I mostly talked about how unfair the election system was. I’ll summarize the main points here.

It’s never clarified who gets to vote, but the Banished definitely don’t, and I’m not sure if the Talentless do either.

There are no term limits, so the Councillors could rule for thousands of years.

The Council decides literally everything about society.

Only Nobility are allowed to be Councillors.

So, therefore, the most vulnerable members of society are NEVER allowed to have their voices heard or have a say in the way their world works.

There is also no version of Congress or Parliament or any sort of court of the people. The Council makes all the decisions. They create the treaties, hold the verdict in Tribunals, keep all the secrets. The only way somebody could make their voice heard is if an Emissary or somebody of status brought an issue directly to the Council, and even then, they don’t get any deciding vote on the issue.

There’s also the cache system. It’s been brought up many times in the books why this system sucks, and for good reason. Sure, guilt is shattering. But wasn’t there a better way of dealing with the LITERAL HUMAN EXPERIMENTATION than hiding it from the world and making everyone think the humans were nothing more than power-hungry monsters? Hiding the fact that they started a revolution for good reason?

The no-family rule!! Yeah, this never really made sense to me. I guess it’s to make decisions “impartial” or whatever they said but idk. I feel like there could’ve been a better way to do it. Sorry for not saying much on it but I never really thought about it that much beyond the fact that I just don’t get it.

Finally, let’s talk about the actual Councillors. There’s only a few that get any actual characterization - Alina, Bronte, Kenric, Oralie, Terik, Fintan, and to a lesser extent Emery.

Alina’s sorta just an asshole. There’s no other way to put it. She’s portrayed as someone who perfectly fits within the system and sees no problem with it because it never hurt her. She cares about Sophie and co. only when they still abided with the society. Once they started to rebel, she immediately turned on them.

Bronte’s seen as a jerk in the beginning, but he gets better throughout the series. You can see that he mourns the humans and disagrees with many of the Council’s decisions. He turns into a great ally for Sophie. However, he’s an Ancient Councillor and who knows how many of their war crimes he was a part of.

Kenric is the “good guy” Councillor, but in the later books it’s been revealed that he had a lot of secrets and was involved in a lot of shady stuff. He saw the first signs of the gnomish plague, I’m pretty sure, in that one Forgotten Secret.

Oralie’s another one of the “good guys” who has a lot more going on. Sophie’s rightfully pissed at her once it’s revealed that Oralie’s her mother and never once acted like one or gave her more help than she could without endangering her status. She works with the Black Swan, but she also abides by the Council’s rules and doesn’t want to give up her position.

Terik helps Sophie quite a bit, even staying in touch with her when she runs away, but again, he’s still a Councillor. When he hears about the state of Exillium, he, along with Oralie, only make the establishment more livable instead of abolishing it.

Emery is the spokesperson of the Council and therefore abides by the law more than anyone. He seems like an ally to Sophie in the beginning, but he advocating for putting a literal torture device on her.

Seeing a pattern? ‘Cause I am. These people only care about helping Sophie and her friends when they abide by the law or when it doesn’t hurt their position. They put on a good guy facade but hold a lot of shady secrets.

The only person on this list who doesn’t fit this is Fintan, and he’s a straight up villain. He was fine with the Council’s rulings until they affected him, and even then he still believes in elven supremacy.

Overall? The Council just sucks.

#very messy as usual #but ya just gotta accept that #kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc worldbuilding #kotlc council #asked #councillor oralie #councillor terik #councillor kenric #councillor bronte #fintan pyren #councillor alina #councillor emery #kotlc discourse #kotlc spoilers

[americanphancakes]

I wanna talk about my mind for a little bit

I was gonna save this until after I posted the last Wingless Angel chapter but I can’t post it yet. Pretty sure my mind wants me to get this out of my system first.

So hi everyone, how are you? How have you been? Honestly if you’re still following at all I’m delighted.

I don’t want this to come across as some excuse for all the unfinished fanfic I left behind 3+ years ago, which is why I wanted to publish WA first, so I hope you don’t take it that way. But I ended up stumbling upon an aspect of my mental health that I’m still trying to address and since I never really saw anyone post or talk about my particular issue before very recently, I wanted to share it in case it resonates with anyone.

(Clearly stuff has changed, this is where I'd normally put a "read more" but.... I guess that's not a thing anymore?? Hopefully this isn't a huge annoying wall of text on everyone's dash, oof.)

I’ve posted before about my ADHD. I’ve been getting treatment for it for 10 years now, and for all that time, medication & other coping mechanisms have been helpful to a point, but only to a point. There was still something left that was keeping me from functioning, and I couldn’t tell what it was. All I knew was that I had no will of my own, and I’d spent the last 10 years trying to create situations where the people in charge were asking (or implying that i should do) things I considered good to do. “People in charge” meant anyone besides myself. If someone was not me, they automatically had authority, simply by virtue of being someone external to me.

I did a lot of research trying to find something that matched up with my experiences & feelings, even partially, and I looked into things like PDA autism and even just the people-pleasing habits common with other ADHD folks.

At some point, with therapy, I did learn how to say “no” to other people’s demands of me. I learned to set boundaries. But I was still profoundly uncomfortable with dictating what I was going to do, especially if anyone else was ever going to be aware of it.

When I was a little kid, i was told “no” constantly, and that’s not hyperbole. I’ve cited the story many times of falling in love with the violin when I was 9 but immediately being told “No, you’re going to play the flute.” So I played the flute, but without any passion for it I couldn’t figure it out and I quit, and my mom never stopped making me feel guilty about it. But that wasn’t the only example of that kind of thing. I wanted to play soccer; mom said play basketball, so I played basketball. I wanted to play piano; mom bought me a guitar and my sister got the electronic keyboard. (We eventually switched, but I never felt like I could fully commit to playing the thing). I wanted to learn Spanish or Japanese in high school; mom told me to learn French, so I took four fucking years of French.

My feelings and wishes were effectively not a factor in what I was allowed to do, what goals I was allowed to pursue, unless I was staying in my room and out of everyone’s way (and even then I had to make sure I jumped up to do what was asked of me if I got called from another room). Eventually I learned, as a survival mechanism, to just obey. It wasn’t worth fighting anymore because I was systematically robbed of my individuality at every turn. Something happened when I was 13 that I will never talk about publicly and she played "good parent who has her kid's back" for about 5 minutes before siding with the bad guy. I brought it up years later and she was mad I'd never gotten over it. And all that is on top of being raised to be a "good little capitalist drone" who needs to be perfect and efficient at all times. I was never supported. I was never given grace. So I never gave grace to myself, because if your own parents don't give you grace & time to learn and be flawed, then clearly you don't deserve any, right?

I finally cut my mother out of my life not long after the pandemic began, a few months after having gone no-contact from my father (mostly due to his casual racism & transphobia, which cost me at least one very close friendship when I was a kid, and was unkind to my child in a way I could not abide). My immediate family - spouse and kid - are the only family I have left now. And it sounds tragic on paper, because it is, but until I finally got away from my mother's voice in real life I couldn't filter through the recordings of her voice in my mind so I could finally throw them away. And that knot is still being untied. Honestly this is 10 years into a very long mental health journey, when you think about it, but I wish I'd cut my mom out of my life a very very long time ago. I wasn't angry about lost time when I got my ADHD diagnosis. I was angry about it when I realized that yes, this had been abuse, and I hadn't been courageous enough to get away from it sooner.

Because that dehumanization resulted in me having no will power of my own, and that extended as far as simply not wanting anything anymore. I like things, sure, but anything I WANTED for myself was out of the question, especially if it involved other people in any way, but honestly even solo pursuits became impossible for me to will myself to do. For right now, when I have something I want to do, I'm telling my friends & husband to order me to do it. Because I won't do it otherwise. And it's a potentially dangerous workaround, but it's all I have for now. I and my therapist are hoping that once my brain registers that what other people are telling me to do is aligned with what I want to do, maybe it won't depend on other people's commands anymore and I'll just take control of my own life for once. But that may not work. I'll have to wait and see.

So what does this have to do with my abandoned fics? Well, it had started to become more difficult to write because the adhd "shinyness" was wearing off anyway, but I'd been doing a good job of pushing past it because people liked what I was writing. I could see my skill getting better, and engagement was going up, and that was really motivating. But then... I stopped writing fic all of a sudden because someone made a post about finding it shitty when writers wrote about COVID in their fics, and.... that was sort of a last straw that broke me, because I do exactly that in the last WA chapter. So I just turned tail and ran away. I tried to push through and write & publish the chapter anyway, because it was the LAST chapter and I knew people were waiting on it, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Even having OSBB obligations didn't get me writing again, and given that obligation, the shame I felt about not having finished those stories weighed on me so badly that I couldn't even interact with you guys on Instagram, despite you having been so kind to me in the past. Let's face it, that goes WAY beyond adhd rejection sensitivity, that's a trauma response. I saw one bit of honestly well-reasoned critique of work that wasn't even mine, and I just ran. Immediately I felt like I was no longer allowed to take up space here. I felt unwelcome here in this corner of the internet world, just as I have always felt like I wasn't allowed to take up space in the physical world for almost my ENTIRE life. And the shame I already feel about myself normally was compounded by what I felt was a cowardly thing to do, which prevented me from returning. Now that I've accepted that, yes, I am an abuse victim whose life has been MASSIVELY and MAJORLY affected by that childhood trauma, I'm finally able to address it properly. Over the last few weeks I've been changing the direction of my therapy and my self-talk (reparenting yourself is HARD) and I'm feeling some improvement, but progress isn't linear so my burst of motivation the other night fizzled out, and I'm genuinely sorry for that.

So... yeah, I'm trying to come back and get those fics finished. I'm grateful for any of you willing to be patient with me. Consciously I KNOW I deserve any support willingly given to me by any of you, but I FEEL like I don't. So yeah. Thanks. <3

#long post #me irl #i'm sure i had a tag for original posts but i dont' know wtf it was #it's been awhile #I'm too damn old to already have so many regrets #i'm mourning a lot of goals i had once that are no longer options #or even things i'm not as interested in doing anymore #like i'm still sad i didn't do them in the first place even tho i don't wanna do them now #but some stuff i really do want to do #and i hope to regrow my childhood will power soon enough that i can do them #cuz yeah there is a proper midlife crisis going on now #i am halfway to death if i'm lucky #and my life has never been my own #so i'm trying to seize it back but it is really hard to do #I feel like tumblr is the only site that would know where this post is coming from #anywhere else i know it'd just be seen as a sob story excuse or something #i mostly just wanted anyone who's been an abuse victim in a similar way to realize that that's what it is #because i resisted accepting it for so long #and it cost me so much time

[assistantcaptainmitchmarner]

hi, I saw your post about car shopping? I have a few things I stick to (just had my car totalled recently too, it sucks) I would say 1) know the kind of car you want going in, if you have the time shop for a specific make/model. Always google the reviews of a type of car to see how it holds up over time (esp the year. had a friend almost buy a 2012 nissan that her car dealer "friend" wanted to sell her, all the online reviews said the transmission fails at like 70k miles and guess how many miles were on the car) Also, if you're seeing a lot of one particular make/model on the used market that means people are trying to get rid of that car, so stay away from it. Here I kept seeing a ton of toyota prius and fiat 500's. They might be cheaper because there are so many, but it will cost you in the long run. Toyota is the best for low maintenance and reliability, but they might be harder to find 2) details details details. in the states we have a huge problem of flooded cars (from hurricanes) being brought up north and resold. Ask for detailed maintenance records, be VERY sus of a car originally from super far away popping up near you. Look in the trunk or under the hood for signs of another paint color to make sure it hasn't been totalled before and repainted. I try to look for single owner cars, two prev owners or more is a sign there might be something wrong with the car. I hope this helps, if you have any questions or anything feel free to ask me! unfortunately I know the pain of car shopping well

hi, thank you so much!!! unfortunately i don’t fully have the luxury of being able to pick make and models (used car market in canada is wild rn - the whole car market actually) but that’s a great point about googling the car, i’ll definitely do that before buying anything.

and thank you for the details section, it’s exactly that stuff that i know is important but don’t know (didn’t know now, thank you) how to check. thank you so much again and good luck in your own search if you’re still looking!!

#thank you so much!!!!!!! #car stuff #andie.txt