#I am expecting social media to be a NIGHTMARE today | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

judysxnd · 1 year

Note

I AM IN LOVE WITH YOUR WRITINGS ❤

Can I request a pedro × reader?

It's few months into the relationship and pedro , being a bad sleeper , one day woke up from a terrible nightmare . The reader is up so she calms him down and pedro hugs her and tell her ( I love you ) for the first time .

Thank you so so much❤️ it means SO much🥰 love the request, it’s going to be so intimate!! Hope you’ll like it!!

——————————————————————————————

Today has been a long day for Pedro. Waking up at 6am, driving an hour and half for the interviews to promote the last season of the Mandalorian, having lunch at almost 2pm, going to the gym after, and then an appointment with his agent. It was a pretty busy day. As for you, it was a normal work day.

He finally came back around 7:30. You were waiting for him in the living room, scrolling on social media. When you heard the door opening, you stopped what you were doing and went to see him.

“Hey baby” you said shyly, smiling

“Hi angel” his face lit up when he saw you. His movements were slow, kicking his shoes off and putting his stuff away. As he was very happy to finally be home and see you, he was extremely tired. It hit him as soon as he opened the door.

“You look tired” you said, going to hug him. His entire body relaxed as you wrapped your arms around him.

“I’m more than tired” he sighed, holding you tight.

“Yeah I bet you are. Are you also hungry? I was waiting for you”

“A little yeah”

“Uber?”

“Hell yeah. Too tired to cook anything”

“Okay. I’ll order, go take a shower, okay?” You slightly parted, looking at each other.

“You’re too good for me mama” he leaned down to kiss you.

So Pedro went to take his shower. He food arrived right after he joined you in the kitchen. You quietly enjoyed your food and went to bed right away, watching a movie. As you expected, five minutes into the movie and Pedro was dead asleep. You kept watching the movie, it was very interesting.

Trapped in a house. All exists are absolutely no use. The front door? Three steel bear traps. The two French windows in the back? Electric wires in front of them. The windows? Barriers blocking them. The only possible exit are the skylights, but the roof is too high, and it’s not discreet enough to escape the monster. Because yes, there is a monster chasing the man. Nonstop running, going from one hiding spot to another. Sweating, out of breath, unable to run properly, nothing to defend himself. The man goes in a roof, but the monster sees him, so he goes back inside. It’s too dangerous to jump. But there’s something missing. He wasn’t alone. He knows that his girlfriend is missing. He also feels that he is alone, no family anymore. Like they were all gone, they were not existing anymore. The pics on the wall show no face except for the man. He still remembers everything, but- but the pictures? He is alone. Faces erased. What is happening? Oh no, the monster is close. He can hear his heavy breathing. Will he see him in the closet? Oh- yes he did. He swung the door opened. The monster growls, and is about to throw his hands on the man.

Suddenly Pedro wakes up screaming, heavily breathing. It scared you. You sat up next to him, caressing his back, holding his hand

“Wh-What happened?” Pedro asks, still shocked.

“It was a nightmare Pedrito, it’s okay, it’s not real”

“It-It” he paused a second, catching his breath “it felt so real” he put his hands on his face.

“It was not”

“Everyone was-” he couldn’t even say it

“It’s okay, look at me” you put your hand in his cheek, turning his head so that he would look at you. “Look at me, you feel this?” You said touching his hand, his arm, his face. “I’m real, it’s real” you said, making him look around you. He looked at you, not saying anything. You could see his chest moving a lot has he was still out of breath. He suddenly hugged you. “See? I’m real” you added again, hands on his back.

“It was awful, I can’t even describe it”

“Then don’t. Just know that it’s not real. I’m here. I’m real, you’re real.”

“I love you so much” you heard him say. You were surprised, for sure you didn’t expect it. It was the first time either of you said it. Being only together for a few months, it is expectable. You felt butterfly in your stomach. There he was, in pure shock, and saying I love you. It was the purest moment. You let go of him, staring at him, your hands on his cheeks.

“I love you too” you kissed for some time. “Come on, let’s go back to sleep” you turned the tv off. You started to lay down on your side, but Pedro grabbed you.

“Can’t sleep without feeling you corazón, you’re the one keeping me sane” you turned to face him

“I’m not going anywhere.. cariño” he smiled. You hold his hand. “It was just a nightmare. This- This is real” you snuggled right to him, and both fell asleep.

#pedro pascal #cute #fanfic #imagine #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal x reader #gif #pedro pascal imagine #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal preferences #pedro pascal one shot #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x female reader #oneshot

197 notes · View notes

lord-of-the-ducks · 2 years

Text

Ok so I had already been thinking about doing this for a while, but I guess the confirmation that the season 4 leaks are real pushed me over the edge. Long story short, my dumb ass decided that today would be a great day to research the timeline of production for What We Do in the Shadows in an attempt to see if I could spot any patterns, and then use that information to predict when season 4 will be released. I don’t know why I thought that this would be a good idea, given that I hate math, but I did it anyway.

This entire endeavor took me a minimum of six hours. I didn’t keep track, but it was something like that.

Before I give any estimates, I’d like to make a few disclaimers:

1. I am currently taking a statistics class, but it’s the easiest one available at my school. I’ve always been more into English and history, math and science have never been my strengths. So, it is pretty much 100% guaranteed that I fucked up somewhere. I’m willing to bet that if someone who actually understands statistics were to take a look at my process, they would cry.

2. I had a pathetically small data set. There were only three seasons to work with, and sometimes, I either wouldn’t have anything for a certain season or I would have to exclude obvious outliers. Speaking of that last one,

3. The past two years have been a fucking nightmare and have screwed up a lot of things, especially tv production, so this wasn’t as easy as just calculating the average amount of days it took from the end of one season to the beginning of the next.

I’ll be including everything I used at the end of this post in case anyone does actually want to double check everything I did, and perhaps make their own calculations without spending 2 hours watching every single WWDITS video on the FX channel.

So, into the juicy details:

We’ll probably get an official teaser around the end of February or the beginning of March. Probably the beginning of March

The official trailer for season 4 will come after that, probably in mid March

Season 4 will hopefully start airing sometime in mid April. I’m more confident about this than the dates for the teaser and trailer. Mainly because the variables that I used to calculate this felt much more consistent.

Again, these are all estimates based off of somewhat shaky numbers, but I think it’ll be really cool to see if I was correct. Also, now that I’ve gotten a lot of this busy work out of the way, I can hopefully use all of this data for potential future seasons and make better predictions about when we can expect them to arrive.

DATA (DM me if you have trouble opening something)

Calendar: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1-1Fps43nBgV2ZIK-9BhfMLwiM3hC64OEgW7ORqZSZbE/edit#gid=935356133

Calculations: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1Dbk_6XQycls7UG-n4iASZK4Wuu3KyFs5TKdlqqnd-F8/edit#gid=0

Production Timeline: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1NYkgXEOKKmSyjA7Es27rgp87oc3r-RrkVEvjmwbumRU/edit

I got all of the dates for the timeline from social media accounts of people involved with the show, and the filming dates in particular from using the wayback machine on the IATSE 873 website, which basically shows who’s filming in Toronto and when.

Also, by the time this goes up, it’ll hopefully have the amount of days between each of the days so that anyone who actually does like statistics can just do some simple addition and not have to spend like, 30 minutes plugging everything into a website that counts the days between dates. I want it to be as easy as possible for people to check my work

#wwdits #wwdits fx #what we do in the shadows #wwdits s4 #please let this blow up I spent so long on this #my mom filmed me ranting about numbers I have lost all decency #I can't believe I made myself do statistics for fun #guillermo de la cruz #nandor the relentless #nadja of antipaxos #nadja cravensworth #laszlo cravensworth

54 notes · View notes

kirishoshego · 3 years

Text

Part of Me//Bakugo

Summary: You could say that Bakugo was the one that got away but now that you were about to marry things change Words. 3.1k+ TW: sfw: angst, fluff, mention of heart break (both him and you) being in a more or less unhappy relationship Whenever people would ask you how you felt about your upcoming wedding you would smile and say: ‘Really excited’ Because that’s how you were supposed to feel. Excited, happy, deeply in love, lucky, joyful, blessed, in seventh heaven, over the moon.

Your fiancé was kind and caring, he never made you doubt his love for you, at least not intentionally. If you were to tell him ‘jump’ he would ask ‘how high’, he would never tell you no, he would agree with everything you say. Whatever you wanted to do would be what he wants and apologize even before doing something wrong. Yet, you felt everything but. Don’t get it wrong: You were happy, you loved your fiancé... But if you loved him the way you were supposed to, why was the small wooden box filled with love letters of the love of your youth your most priced possession? You told yourself it was just harmless sentimental value, pale memories you don’t want to fade away completely. But you couldn’t hide the small rips nor the dried wet spots, all evidence of the many nights you read them over and over again. You couldn’t deny the tug on your heart whenever your eyes skipped over his name at the end of each letter, couldn’t help the way your body was arching for his touch every time you thought about him. Arch for the love he only ever gave to you. Have his arms wrapped around your body one last time, his lips on yours as a kiss good bye, hear his raspy voice in your ear, calling out your name to bring you peace before you leave.

Regret filled every inch of your body whenever you think back to the day you walked out of his life, walked away from your future together. It was the day after your graduation. Bakugo was on top of the class, of course he was, he had trained so hard and studied so much, it couldn’t have been any other way. You were on 6th place and Bakugo was so proud of you, even happier for you than he was for himself. He had planned to move in with you soon, even spotted a sweet apartment the two of you could share. Talking about the family you could start, about marriage. But in the night of the big party you bumped into Izuki, who congratulated the both of you and when your boyfriend walked away to grab something to drink the green haired boy turned around to you with a smile on his face. ‘I never would have though Kacchan would be able to fall for someone. He’ll even give up spot #1 just to be with you, that must be true love’ he said, kind and soft, not the tiniest hint of evil in his voice. And yet he caused more damage to Bakugo and you than the L.O.V ever did with those two sentences. That night you realized that you were being awfully selfish, keeping Katsuki away from his biggest dream in life. All he ever wanted was to be Hero #1, to be better than anyone, better than All Might. But here you were, keeping him back. Caged. Taking his precious time just for your happiness. His happiness was far more important for you than yours will ever be. So that night you disappeared. A simple note left on his nightstand, telling him you’re sorry but it’s better that way, you won’t be holding him back anymore, you promised, and the ghost of a kiss lingering on his lips was the only trace you had left behind for him when he woke up in the early morning hours.

Years have passed before the two of you met again. It was a fluke, more or less, that you were seated next to him on a plane. Yet, there was no awkwardness between the two of you, as if the night never had happened, as if you were still so familiar with one another, like you just spend hours, not years, apart. Neither one of you dared to bring the memory up though, him scared to find out why you left him, you scared to find out how much it must have hurt him. But your decision was the right one, he was on the top now. Bakugo Katsuki, Dynamight, Pro Hero #1. And you were so proud of him, you always knew he could do it, but these words never went past your lips, as if you had no right to tell him that. Of course you kept an eye on him, celebrated with him from afar, but you left him, you had no right to act as if you had supported him in anyway. That’s what you told yourself. When he asked to exchange numbers you were happy, but whenever your phone binged around your fiancé you felt shame in the pit of your stomach. Because you knew Bakugo could never be ‘just a friend’, he’ll always be more. Because it was him you called in those lone nights when your fiancé was out of town, it was him you texted first in the morning and last in the night. Because whenever you met him for a cup of coffee you told the man you’re going to marry it was just a friend you met up with, someone you knew from work. Whenever you noticed the door to him opening again you shut it close, sealing it with oh so many locks and yet they’re opened within seconds whenever his name was seen on your screen. You had to remind yourself why you kept it shut over all these years, the pain of losing him too much to bare.

The wedding was now slowly edging closer, every single day feeling dreadfully longer than the one before. And the less time you had, the more you doubted your decision to be with him for the rest of your life, as your heart was devoted to someone else. It wouldn’t be fair to him, he loved you dearly, treated you with nothing but kindness, you should do the same. But Midoriya’s voice reminded you that, without you, Bakugo was stronger, you couldn’t expect him to just take you back after what you’ve done, you couldn’t be so crude to the man you loved more than life itself. So you stayed. You told yourself you were the happiest like this. And it wasn’t like you had no love for your fiancé, you did. Otherwise you wouldn’t have accepted his proposal. It was good the way it was, changing it would just cause more chaos than necessary. It might break your heart in the progress, but that’s better than breaking the hearts of those you loved. You sucked it up, took a deep breath and put a smile on your face. Things will be just fine. But the night before your big day was spend alone, shrouded in darkness as silent tears spilled out of your sleep deprived eyes, caressing your cheek. You had opened every letter of Bakugo the very same day you got them. At first the letters started out as a joke, but there was something about them that made these written words a big part of your lives. You did text daily, of course, but (even though Bakugo would kill everyone who would dare to even think about it) he liked the romantic aspect of it. Texts can get deleted, lost within the world wide web, gone with a simple crash. Meaningless as some sort of, because everyone texted via social media today. And you weren’t everyone. You were Bakugo and Y/N, an odd couple somehow, but you weren’t bothered by the way people talked about you. Not at all. What mattered was that you had each other, for ever. Shaky hands stroked over the last letter you had received, not through him, but Kirishima. At first he pretended your meet up was nothing but an accident but when he left and you arrived home you noticed an envelope, covered in big and some smaller thumb prints, telling you that it must have been moved quite a lot. To this day you didn’t open it, couldn’t brace yourself for what was about to come. You took in a deep breath as the silvery paperknife softly gleamed in the dim light of your nightlight, gliding through the piece of paper. My Y/N, To be honest I don’t know where to start. God, I fucking hate this. You changed your number, moved away and didn’t even leave an explanation. Do you really hate me that much? To just leave me behind like I’m some sort of extra and not the man you wanted to spent the rest of your life with. I know those weren’t lies, you never were able to lie to me. So now I’m out here, looking like a fool, trying to wrap my head around the fact my person is gone without a trace. I even talked to Deku, asked him if he knew anything, but of course that extra didn’t knew shit. He offered to talk to you but I didn’t want him out of all people to contact you. Kiri told me he had run into you once, he said you looked awful. Not really his words, but from what he described you are just as torn apart as I am. Which confuses me even more. If you’re so hurt why won’t you come back? I hate giving second chances but I would do anything for you. You got me fucking whipped for you shitty woman and then you just pack your stuff and leave? The last couple of month have been awful. I haven’t slept properly, I can’t without you next to me. If you need time (even if I don’t understand for what, because we’ve been going strong since day one dipshit, if someone needs time it’s me from your annoying, cute fucking self) I can give that to you, just come back. Kirishima is trying really badly to fill in your spot and (don’t you dare to ever tell a single soul about this, I’ll kill you… maybe…) while his hugs are warm and loving and attempt to make me laugh do crag me up here and there it’s not the same. No one can ever replace you. We are young, we don’t know shit about life, but if I do know one fucking thing is that I want to wake up to your stupid angelic face every morning. I still remember the nights were you asked me what had torn me apart, the nights you held me close to you because of the awful nightmares that haunted me. I never wanted you know what they were about, never wanted you to worry, but never had I imagined that those nightmares will turn true. That I’ll lose you. Damn it, I want to marry you, have kids with you (if you want, I’m fine with sticking to practice) and turn old and grey and yell at the neighbors kids for ruining our garden. I might can’t give you everything you want but I know I’m everything you need and visa versa, I guess. Y/N I don’t want to bottle you up, but I can’t let you go either. It’s so fucking confusing and I hate it. I hate that you didn’t give me a clean cut, a proper explanation but at the same time I don’t want that, I don’t want to know why you left me, cause maybe I pushed you away, maybe it was my fault. Whatever your reason is we can work through it. I promise you, I’ll love you forever, because you are a part of me. The best. I won’t ask you to send me a letter back, as I will never send it to you. I think hearing from you, meaning you won’t come back, would just break me more. So now I have to be selfish, focus on me again, because if I won’t I’ll drown, Katsuki Lines were crossed out, some words thickened, indicating the many times he wrote them, over and over again. Like he said, he never planned for this letter to ever reach you. He didn’t knew Kirishima gave it to you and even Kirishima never knew if you found it, maybe it got lost on the way, some things better when hidden. That night, you cried yourself to sleep, torn into so many pieces you couldn’t count every small particle, even if you tried. That was the moment you realized you will never be whole again, never be home again.

You looked at yourself in the mirror, dressed in all white, the most beautiful gown you had ever laid your eyes upon. All evidence of the previous nightly events were hidden under a mask of make-up, your hair never sat more perfect than it did right now. When your eyes met the person in the mirror you couldn’t identify with her. Whoever she was, she looked like a happy bride, someone who was in love with her fiancé, in love with her life. “Hey,” a deep voice spoke up behind you, making you drop the bouquet. Turning around you were met with the most beautiful set of crimson red eyes. “Katsuki, what...” you stammered, not knowing if your mind just messed with you, the cold feet everyone warned you about now making their appearance. “You look beautiful,” he told you, walking closer to you, your nose filled with your favorite smell in the world. Softly burned caramel. You held your hand up, scared that if you touch him he’ll be gone, just a figment of your imagination. “What are you doing dumbass?” he laughed, setting of thousand of butterflies in your stomach, starting the fire that was long defunct. “Come here,” he pulled you and the moment your skin touched his you realized he was here, with you, in this room. Bakugo held you close to him, biting back the tears that threatened to spill out his eyes, because it wasn’t him you will walk to at the end of the aisle. “What are you doing here?” you whispered into his chest, your hands fisting his suit jacket, feeling complete again. Finally at home. “I promised to be with you, by your side to celebrate every milestone in your life. And marriage is a huge one, don’t you think?” he asked you as you looked up to him, lips inches away from one another. “But...” suddenly reality came crushing down, everything was not going to be just fine. Thousand knives pushed into your chest at once. Or at least that’s what it felt like. “Today is your big day Y/N. After all these years you’re still my best friend,” “Hey!” you heard Kirishima suddenly call out in the door frame, ducking down to not hit his head. “Eijiro!” you exclaimed, engulfing him into a big hug as best as you could. “Hey little one, you’re still as small as I remember!” he laughed, gently wiping away your tears that threatened to ruin your mascara. “Sorry for not answering your invitation, we were just awfully busy with Hero Work and our secretary messed up, mixing the actual mail with fan mail,” Bakugo explained after Kirishima set you down again. “I’m so happy to have the two of you by my side, my favorite men finally with me again,” you told them, looking at Bakugo. He still had the same expression on his face whenever he would look at you. Filled with love and adoration. “But I’m your absolute favorite, right?” Kirishima laughed, his smile beaming. “Of course you are,” you endorsed your tall friend standing next to you. “We will actually wait outside, the church is stuffed, so...” Eijiro trailed off, his eyes glued to his best friend. “Yeah! But we wanted to see you before, to uhm...Congratulate you,” Bakugo cleared his throat, putting on the best smile he could for you. You seemed so happy, that was all he ever wanted. “Yeah, congrats, your guy seems nice,” “Yeah, he is,” was all you could say. Because he was nice, he just wasn’t Bakugo. “I’m so glad I saw you before, I really did miss you,” your eyes couldn’t let go of the blond man in front of you and neither could his let go of you. “We better get going now,” Kirishima said after some moments draped in silence passed by. “Save a dance for me,” Katsuki told you, kissing your forehead for one last time before leaving through the door. Hours could have passed, maybe minutes, maybe seconds. You had lost track of time after his lips met your skin. When you entered the church, a small wave of Bakugo all you could really register, you weren’t present. It felt like you were in a movie, everything slow motion, watching from afar while the main character walked into her demise. The audience wasn’t applauding her, everyone screamed, asking her what the fuck she was doing. The moment you looked into your fiancé’s eyes, was the moment you snapped out of it, feeling your soul entering your body again, letting you realize what’s happening in first person. He grabbed your hand and looked at you with warm, sad eyes. He knew. “I’m sorry, I-” you whispered, even before the pastor could open up his bible. “It’s okay, go,” was all he said, rubbing his thumb over your hand, reassuring you to go for what you loved. Go for whom you loved. People gasped left and right, whispers filling the holy halls as the bride run down the aisle, pushing open the big wooden doors, her eyes immediately falling onto him. Her lover, her best friend, her other half. Bakugo Katsuki. His back was turned to you, shoulders shaking ever so gently while his best friend towered over his frame, trying his hardest to console the blond. It was Kirishima who noticed you first, pointing at you as Bakugo turned around, not a moment too late as you fell into his arms. “I love you Bakugo Katsuki, I have ever since day one. I was stupid enough to walk away from you once, I won’t do it again. If you don’t want me back I understand, but if I don’t try then-” his lips on your shut you up, first a small amount of shock pumping through your veins, the warm feeling of love and safety replacing it within seconds. “Run away with me?” he asked you, displaying his beautiful smile. “Of course I will, without you I’m just a half, because you’re a part of me, the best.”

©Kirishoshego

292 notes · View notes

lunarflux · 3 years

Text

"i promised i'd forget, but you're all i see when i dream the night away"

bang chan x reader

genre — drama!au

suggested background music: x

note: like i said - i put a lot of my life into writing. something similar to this happened to me today, and i'd like to think that music is getting me through it. i wanted to add more of a "post credits" scene for chan and o/c, but this is how my day is going and how this situation ends.

The world never felt so heavy.

You'd never thought that scrolling through social media could create this bleeding ring in your ears, yet somehow here you are, unable to look at your phone. The photo you stumbled across had already been burned into your memory. There were times when you could forget what song you'd just listened to, and yet this one image had suddenly been burned, a permanent nightmare in your mind.

Your ex looked happy. It wasn't a bad breakup, but after a year, you couldn't expect him to stay single forever. You'd both agreed to move on, and while you swore you had, seeing the photo of him with a beautiful girl kissing his cheek made your shoulders heavy. Staring at your blacked out screen, it was like the photo was still there, and no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't keep yourself from seeing it. Every time you closed your eyes, there he was.

Happy.

You fumbled with your cell phone, placing it face down on your desk before your boss could catch you. It was hard to hide the look on your face. It was pain, sadness, and confusion. How was it that after all this time, you hadn't succeeded in moving on, but he had?

Was it you? Or was this girl really so special that you were worth forgetting?

The feeling of being forgotten - it's seeing the dust gather on photos and the doorknob that he will never open again.

It's over.

"Do you have the paperwork for the meeting tomorrow?" Chan popped into your office, placing a fresh mug of coffee on your desk. You'd started here only six months ago, but he already knew that you liked your coffee light and sweet. "Jisoo wants to make sure we're not missing anything before -"

"Yeah, I have it." You said curtly, looking back at your computer, typing away at your report. "I'll bring it to you later."

"I mean, I can wait for it if you have it ready."

"Chan," you looked up at him. "I said I'll bring it to you later."

Chan looked at you with mild concern. Sure, there were a lot of women in the office, and the men had eventually learned when not to step on toes in the case of any mood swings because of work stress. You weren't one of those people though. You were the type of person who'd rid the stress with a bar of chocolate and be done with it. You'd never snapped at him before.

"Okay." Chan backed out quietly. He ducked into the next office over. Knocking on Minki's office door, he peered in.

"Hey," Minki stood up. "I gotta bring these to the fourth floor, can you watch the phone for me?"

"Yeah, no problem." Chan smiled before taking a seat.

Ping

He knew that you and Minki were office best friends ever since you got hired. While he didn't mean to see it, Minki left his messenger open and slowly your messages came flooding in.

x: he moved on x: am i supposed to be upset? x: we broke up a year ago, so why do i feel so defeated haha x: maybe i'm just decomposing. why do i feel like this x: can we get drinks later? i know you hate it when i drink to drown out my sorrows, but i just can't be here right now.

Damn.

Chan swore he didn't mean to see all that. That would explain the mood though.

x: i didn't think i'd miss him this much. i just want to forget about it.

Taking in a deep breath, Chan pulled out his phone and made a call.

"Chan, why did you need me for this stupid client dinner? And who the hell has dinner at 4PM?" You continuously complained as he drove you down the road into the next district.

"Just relax, it'll be fine."

You rested your head against the passenger side window. As your breath fogged up the glass, you scribbled little hearts, peppered over the skyline as Chan drove. It wasn't until you started seeing signs that you realized you were at Banpo Bridge. Chan pulled into the empty parking lot.

"The client wants to have dinner here? What are we doing - getting takeout?" You jested.

Chan opened your door. "Go sit over there, I'll be right back."

You took your seat right by the edge of the water. The weather really was perfect today. The fresh air helped clear out your thoughts. Even though the breakup was a year ago, seeing that photo really made it feel like it just happened yesterday. Your heart broke twice, and yet you couldn't bring yourself to think that you hate him now. You loved him as a memory - a beautiful, happy memory, and it was time to let go now.

Chan re-emerged next to you, a bag with four bottles of soju and piping hot ramen in his hands.

"Um -" You nearly laughed at the sight of him struggling to carry everything. "Am I missing something? Are the clients your drinking buddies?"

"Sit, sit, please." Chan arranged everything down on the ledge.

"Not that I'm ungrateful, but I am confused."

"I, uh." He sat down next to you, removing his jacket. "I'm sorry. Please don't be mad at me."

Stopping halfway from opening a bottle, you looked up at him.

"y/n, Minki had me watch over his desk, and I... I'm sorry, I saw your messages."

"Chan, that was private." You looked down at your shoes, feeling the heaviness in your chest again.

"I know. And I'm sorry." He grabbed the bottle from you and opened it himself. "Minki had to run to another meeting, and I saw how sad you were. I just figured I'd help you escape for a bit. I called in a favor from the interns to watch your stuff, so we could... do this, I guess."

You'd always known Chan was a softie. He was that guy in the office who never forgot about birthdays and important events. He was never late, and he would do everything he could to help out the new people. Even to you, he was a big help whenever you needed it.

"Again, I'm sorry." He poured two shots and handed you one. "But you looked like you needed it, so - cheers."

You watched him as you threw back your soju. You stifled a smile, "Pitiful, isn't it. Still feeling like you've been dumped even after an entire year."

Chan winced as the alcohol hit the back of his throat. "Not at all. Who said that a year was the right time to get over someone? There's no rule for that."

You continued to sip slowly, watching him open up all the snacks.

"I haven't had a girlfriend in years, and I swear, after my last girlfriend and I broke up, I couldn't stop thinking about her even because of the littlest things. It wasn't a bad breakup, but when you have so many happy moments with someone, you can't help but feel sad when you see that person making new moments with someone else. It makes you wonder if that could've been me, y'know?"

It couldn't be stopped. One deep breath and suddenly all the tears started pouring out. You couldn't control your breathing, and it felt like the weight of the world finally came crashing down on your chest, reminding you of every little happy memory that had to be released into the ocean like confetti.

Chan rushed over, placing his jacket on your shoulders. He hushed you, rubbing your arms to warm you up. Crouching down in front of you, he pulled you up and brought you into his chest.

"Wait, I'll get makeup on your shirt -"

He laughed at your childish worries. "It's just a shirt. Just go ahead, it's okay. I can get it dry-cleaned, and you're worth more than some shirt."

Feeling your tears soak up in the cotton, you just cried, and Chan let you until it felt like there was nothing left. You chest was still heaving, but you felt the weight lift slowly. The sea air started filling your lungs again like an icy burn.

"I'm sorry." You finally looked up, mascara stained on your cheeks. You smeared what you could from your face before sitting.

"Stop apologizing." Chan sat down beside you again. "Do you feel better?"

"A little."

Placing his hand on yours, Chan smiled. It was a warm gentle smile. He squeezed, "It will get better. I promise."

"I just feel like everyone keeps moving on, and I'm just stuck here."

"Where is 'here' to you? 'Here' to me is existing with a good job with good friends and a good life. 'Here' is anything you're doing happily without him." He reached up to cup your cheek. "I know you feel miserable, but your body won't let you feel this way forever. And neither will I. Please don't feel as if 'here' is an awful place. 'Here', you have me, and I'll stay until you're not sad anymore."

Peering up at him with red eyes, you smiled with whatever energy you had. Sadness still sat on your shoulders, but it didn't feel so awful anymore.

Chan nodded towards you.

"Until you're not sad or until you ask me to leave - I'll be here for you."

152 notes · View notes

mk-wizard · 3 years

Text

Big Hero 6 The Series: It could have been better

Hello, friends. Today, I will be analyzing a TV series based on a movie that I fell in love with for its colourful themes, deep plot, compelling characters, great CGI and memorable messages. Before I get into it, I want to take a moment to say that I have quit doing videos. They are too big of a pain in the petunia to make and I write better than I speak, so I will stick to writing essays, reviews and more. Anyway, onto the analysis.

All I can say about Big Hero 6 the series is that it had a great concept, it presented some great ideas and tried hard to be a cartoon of the times, but it could have and should have been a lot better. The show’s downfall all centers around trying too hard to be kid friendly which makes the shame sting all the more because Big Hero 6 was already kid friendly even with its dark themes, sharp edges and intelligent writing. If anything, even the brightest kid friendly cartoons (Steven Universe, She-Ra, etc.) had those things and actually benefitted from them. By needlessly trying too hard, character development got scrapped, the edges were all smoothed out, storytelling was subpar, the humour was too silly and the executive meddling in the end produced a dismal final season. However, I don’t want this analysis to be one lengthy negative rant about how awful the series was because in its defense, awful is an unfair word. It did have potential and ideas which are worth carrying over to a reboot that I hope will be done someday in the future. Also, we should root for a reboot because Big Hero 6 would not be the first story that needs it before striking gold. Just look at how many times Spider-Man was rebooted in film before MCU found the version that worked. Anyway, I will list all the things in Big Hero 6 that could have been better in my opinion;

1- Go easy on the laughs and be more generous with the action. - I love adding comedy to my own writing because I think a good sense of humour makes everything better, but Big Hero 6 is not a stand up comedy routine. It is a superhero story where we expect action, suspense and life or death situations that are to be taken seriously first. The comedy should be for relief and with the right timing. Also, the chibi cutscenes and having characters act like fools aren’t funny. Ren and Stimpy are the exception not the standard and their way of making you laugh doesn’t fit an action series. In a show as big as Big Hero 6, real life physics and danger matters.

2- Make the villains menacing and gritty. - I admit that after having a movie villain like Yokai who was the stuff of nightmares, it is going to be a challenging act to follow, but it was obvious that the writers were trying especially with some villains who could have easily gone into some dark relatable territory. For example, Mr. Sparkles (the gentleman in the photo above) embodies social media and Internet personalities. Right off the bat, you have a long list of things which embody the dark side of that like scams, fraud, using social media to dox or harass, driving people to suicide, online predators, the Internet personalities being very depressed people in real life, and much more horrifying things. When you stop and look at it, Mr. Sparkles even looks like the Joker which hints how dark and scary he could have been if the stops were removed. The same goes for enemies like Hardlight who embodies online gaming, Liv with cloning, Obake an amoral and insane scientist, and Trina and Noodle Burger Boy (more on him later) being evil robots. Globby especially should have been painted and written in much darker colours rather being played off for laughs because he has many parallels with Clay Face. The only two villains who I can say were supposed to be campy, charming and comical were Baron Von Steamer and Supersonic Sue because they were a satire of the Adam West style villains.

The rest of them needed to be dark and threatening including Mr. Sparkles. In fact, I would love a rebooted version of Mr. Sparkles who gives me the heebie-jeebies. Going back to Noodle Burger Boy, I must confess that I was actually excited when I heard that he was going to be the main villain of the final season because I thought he was going to fulfill his master’s final wish and as a reminder, Noodle Burger Boy was based on a super robot for military purposes.

It would have been fantastic if Noodle Burger Boy was upgraded into a full military war machine with a new threatening look. For that, I think all of the villains deserve to be rebooted and have their full potential unlocked for better or for worse.

3- A show about geniuses merits genius level art quality. - I am usually forgiving towards art styles, but in the case of Big Hero 6, the oversimplified style with minimal details and lack of textures did not suit the show. The characters blend in with the background which makes them look flat and the special effects were extremely dulled down. I also know for a fact that Disney can do a lot better than this because I saw how superbly Tangled the Series was drawn.

You can see and almost feel the difference in quality, the number of layers and level of detail between the two styles. I think there was no excuse Big Hero 6 was not done in the same style and at the same level if not better as Tangled.

3- Don’t dumb down or flanderize amazing characters. - I absolutely detest it when characters are flanderized because it makes them one dimensional and grating. For example, Go Go is tough as nails and extremely calm, but she is not cold or hesitant towards helping her friends. She doesn’t require very special episodes for us to know that. If anything, the movie version of Go Go reminded me a lot of Garnet in how she deconstructed the broody character. She isn’t cold or emotionless. Just calm and mature. Another good example was how Honey Lemon was rewritten to be overly positive to the point of toxicity, naïve and oblivious with a juvenile obsession with stickers. Then you have poor Fred who was rewritten to be an incompetent fool. The spark that makes Big Hero 6 shine is that they are a team of geniuses meaning they are all intelligent. Even Fred is genius in his own way just not a scientific one. He has a vivid imagination, he is resourceful and can get himself out of tight spots. Please, don’t turn characters into dummies especially if their intelligence is a part of them. It doesn’t make them better or funnier. It ruins them.

4- Tadashi needs closure and honour. - I am all for Hiro making peace with the loss of his brother, but Tadashi is to the Big Hero 6 team what Uncle Ben was to Spider-Man. His loss was the catalyst if not the reason. He should never be forgotten. Moreover, there was never any true closure to him especially with the possibility that he may still be alive up in the air. After all, like Callaghan, his body was never found and it turned out that Callaghan was still alive.

With that said, who is to say that Tadashi was not secretly still alive and just hiding or being hidden? This is something that Disney really needed to clear up if not for the fans, then at least as a service to such an important character. Never just forget about them.

5- The format can only be episodic with a deep plots, continuity and character development. - Random episodes with a mere monster of the day is an outdated format which doesn’t fit Big Hero 6′s modern and bright setting. In seasons 1 and 2, when the episodes were plot heavy with character development, the series shined brightest. It also helped move the story along, but with the final season, plot was removed, closure was abandoned or poorly written if any was given, and characters were disallowed from growing. A good example at how plot and character development could have made this series and its characters better was the relationship between Hiro and Megan. Would it have truly survived or would they have broken up?

Would Richardson Mole have eventually lost interest in his obsession with besting and bullying Fred or would his obsession consume him compelling him to become a super villain? I do see quite a few similarities between Mole and Reverse Flash.

Then you have Karmi who is in my opinion, the biggest wild card of the bunch. She was intentionally introduced as an arrogant, prickly and unlikable yet complex character who rivaled Hiro bitterly.

Yet had a huge crush on his alter ego and as time went on, started to grow up and even form a friendship with Hiro. What would have happened further down the road with her? Would she have become a super hero herself? Or maybe even another love interest for Hiro kind of like how Black Cat is for Spider-Man?

Is Obake really gone?

What does the future hold Diana (Liv’s clone), Liv herself or the Sycorax the genetics company?

Is Alistair Krei going to become an ally to Big Hero 6 or an antagonist? There is also the issue at how little we know about the other Big Hero 6 characters other than Fred, Hiro and Baymax. What are Honey Lemon, Wasabi and Go Go’s backstories? These questions matter and while not every mystery can be solved, leaving none of them solved is lazy writing.

6- Executives, kindly stay out of the writing and any other part of the creative process. - I’m sorry, execs, but there is no nice way to say it. History itself proves that every time executives got involved in the creative process of any media, it got worse not better. Leave the writing to the creative team and the execs should only handle the legal stuff. Please. We understand that TV is a business, but writing itself is not. It is an art which you just don’t have a talent for. Let the creative people do their thing with the freedom necessary and you do your thing, deal? Deal.

7- Focus on Hiro and Baymax. - The are the main characters so keep them at the heart of the series no matter what happens around them. That is all I can say.

And that sums up all the things that could have made Big Hero 6 the series better, but this is all just my opinion. What is yours?

PS: I am well aware that the Big Hero 6 series is being retconned because a new series called Baymax is in the works as well as the long awaited sequel to the first movie. I am looking forward to both with an open mind. PPS: I also am aware that some people liked this show the way it was including the art style and I am cool with that. An analysis for art that includes cartoons is never right or wrong. It is solely based on opinion. I may have thought this series could have been better, but there are people who make arguments that it could have been worse.

120 notes · View notes

zeroone-eleven · 3 years

Note

Somebody else by 1975 and it is sparkles-✨

It worked out well; Park Chaeyoung (Blackpink)

--------------------------------------------------

Summary: Y/N and Rosé had decided to announce their relationship, but they were gonna be extra about it.

Requested? ☑

"I remember it all too well."

--------------------٩(◕‿◕｡)۶--------------------

It was the final part of Y/N's concert and while he's used to the feeling of thousands of eyes on him, what's going to follow was something that made him extremely nervous, which says a lot. Especially when he was counting on the audience for his plan to work.

At the start of his career, he had announced that he was a Transgender man on all of his social media platforms. An action that took a lot of guts, and and an action that drew a lot of attention to him. At the rising point of his career when he was questioned about it in an interview, his answer was something that made him well known figure within the industry.

--------------------------------------------------

"Now Y/N at the very beginning of your career, you told the world that you were a trans man. That must've taken extreme bravery on your part seeing as those people who are against your community- The LGBT community, can be downright nasty and ruthless in 'Expressing' their dislike. What mae you decide to do this so early on in your time in the spotlight?"

Y/N smiles in his seat, switching from a laid back posture to one that elegantly demands attention, his next words being the ones that made him an icon amongst allies and LGBT people alike. "I am an advocate of LGBT rights before I am an artist, at the very start of my career I wanted to make it clear that I didn't want bigots to be a part of my following or an avid listener of my music and while I'm a man who values my privacy, I value honesty and transparency just as much. So if you're someone who believes that transgender people are just 'Confused' or that they're a 'Crime' against nature? Then go ahead and consider me your worst nightmare."

--------------------------------------------------

Y/N had been sitting on a chair for quite a few moments now, holding a Q&A onstage before he stands up and decides to follow through with the first part of his plan. "Alright, now today's intermission, I'm going to do a cover of my most favorite song called 'Somebody Else by The 1975'. Oh and don't worry you guys, the Q&A will still continue after this cover." The stadium fills with loud screams and cheers from the people watching as he places his mic back on its stand and goes to pick up his electric guitar. The lights dim into a sunset red as the opening notes of the music fill out through the speakers, Y/N starts singing and playing his guitar as the crowd claps along to the beat.

At the start of the second verse, Y/N takes off his guitar and takes the mic off of the stand, walking back to the guitar stand, he puts the instrument down before walking back to the front of the stage and hyping the people up to sing along with him in the pre-chorus. The entrance platform that had sunk back down starts rising as a distinctly feminine voice fills the stadium at the start of the chorus. Y/N smiles widely as the stage screens show Rosé walking towards him, offering her hand. He takes it and raises their hands up, leading the Blackpink member into a twirl, the crowd has gone wild at this point and the duo are pretty sure that somebody or multiple people in the audiences are Blinks seeing the way they've started chanting Rosé's name even without Y/N introducing her beforehand.

The bridge part comes along and the two singers alternate their lines. When the instrumental hits, Rosé takes his hands and starts dancing along to the beat, dorkily smiling and roping the man into dancing along. When the final chorus comes, Y/N and Rosé sing together, motioning for the crowd to sing along and the stadium fills with the sounds of music and the combined voices of a chanting crowd.

The song comes to an end with loud cheers for the two vocalists who are now smiling widely while catching their breaths. Y/N offers his hand to Rosé and when she takes it, the two raise their hands and perform a bow. He lets go of her hand once they've come up from the bow, turning to face her before speaking. "May I introduce, Park Chaeyoung of Blackpink everyone."

The woman in question laughs, shaking her head before going to bow once again and waving to the crowd with both hands, Y/N decides to push his luck. "Also known as Rosé of Blackpink, or Rosie, or Foodsé, or Chipm-" He runs as she jokingly tries to swat at his shoulder.

The cheers continue and the two laugh with each other before Rosè speaks to the crowd. "So how did you guys like our cover?" She's answered with loud cheers and Y/N's manager signals at the two from behind the curtain, raising both his hands up. 10 minutes left, Y/N nods at him and smiles while Rosé turns her attention back to the crowd, he gives the singers a thumbs up with a dorky smile before taking his leave. Y/N shakes his head in humor.

"I'm pretty sure I'm speaking for both me and Y/N over here when I say that we're happy to see you guys loved it." Y/N turns to Rosé to agree with her statement. Y/N speaks into the mic saying that he and Rosé will spend the last ten minutes of the concert for the Q&A. The following minutes fly by with questions aimed at Y/N, questions aimed at Rosé as well as questions aimed at both come in droves, until Y/N announce that the next question will be the last one before the event comes to an end and they have to start saying goodbye. Multiple people raise their hand, and he leaves it up to Rosé to pick who gets to ask the final question. She gives her mic to a girl in the front row, and the girl states her question.

"How did you come up with the idea to have Rosé make a special appearance for a cover? Going by your latest Instagram posts before this album dropped, it seemed like you guys were writing songs together. So we were really hyped for a collab." The fan hands the mic back to Rosé who smiles at Y/N as he takes a deep breath, steeling himself for what's to come next. The Western singer brings his mic up to his lips to answer.

"There's a pretty good reason for this cover actually. 'Somebody Else' is a song that holds special meaning for the both of us, besides being our favorite song." Y/N motion for Rosé to take the lead, and she steps closer to him before speaking. "There was a point in me and Y/N's life that we didn't know where we stood. It a point we could sort of compare to the kid's game: Tag." She looks over to the man beside her, silently asking if he wants to back out of it. Instead Y/N takes her hand, interlocks their fingers and squeezes. Go on, I'm ready.

"Long story short is that I was hung up and broken hearted over this person and he was hung up over me." Collective gasps resound through out the stadium. After all, the only thing they know about you and Rosé relationship up until this point was that she was helping you write songs. You bring your mic up to your lips and speak. "The pictures on my Instagram of her looking at the lyrics I wrote? That wasn't Rosé helping me write. That was Chaeyoung reading what I wrote about her." The crowd goes crazy over the newfound information, and Y/N's pretty sure that they miss the way he referred to her using her real name instead of her stage name. But Chaeyoung catches onto it and she smiles softly at the man.

"I can't even begin to describe how thankful I am to Y/N by the way. Staying up countless nights and listening to me ramble on about being torn up, being there for me in every single way, helping me heal and doing all of this without expecting anything in return. Such a gentleman really." The crowd collectively 'Awwwwws' and Y/N hangs his head low, hiding his blush from everyone, Rosé laughs as Y/N looks at the ceiling, composing himself before speaking.

"I would never expect anything in return from you and you don't have to thank me either, I was just doing what a friend would've done at a time like that. Anyways, I stuck by her in those times all while all I could think of afterwards was how stupid the person who broke her heart was, all while I wished I was the one she had ended up with instead of them. I never even hinted at how I felt about her in those times, much less actually tell her. I promised myself I wouldn't tell her how I felt until the time was right. I didn't want her to feel guilty or pressured at all by what I had to say." Y/N looks from the crowd infront of him to Rosé before continuing "Time passed and her heartbreak had healed. But she still wasn't ready for a relationship for a while after that whole ordeal, so I kept my promise and I waited."

"When I had told my members and Y/N that I was finally ready for another relationship- That like, I was completely okay. Y/N decided to court me instead of asking me outright to be his girlfriend. Can you believe this sap?" The crowd laughs with Rosé as Y/N's jaw hits the floor, he walks away from Rosé and heads to the other side of the stage. He crouches and points to Rosé "I was being noble, chivalrous and mind you I was trying to prove that I was boyfriend material! Then she goes and calls me a sap?! I can't believe this..." Y/N lowers the mic and shakes his head in mock disbelief. Rosé doubles over in laughter before walking over to him and resting her free hand on his shoulder.

"Yes, I'm calling you a sap because you are one. But it worked out didn't it?" She looks down at Y/N before continuing. "I gladly said yes." The crowd goes crazy, people cheering, some were jumping, and the others were speechless.

Y/N smiles, a full smile from ear to ear as he takes Chaeyoung's hand on his shoulder to bring it to his lips. "Yeah, yeah it worked out well in the end didn't it?"

--------------------٩(◕‿◕｡)۶--------------------

A/N: Damn writing in 3rd person is a TASK. I might never do it again, I hope this was good enough? I'm not too sure about the ending but I liked the idea of them announcing their relationship infront of a crowd instead of doing it via a social media post. So yeah.

#Blackpink #Blackpink x Reader #Park Chaeyoung #Park Chaeyoung x Reader #Rosé #rosé x reader #reader!insert #TransMale!Reader #Male!Reader #Park Chaeyoung x Trans male!Reader #Rosé x Trans Male!Reader #Park Chaeyoung x Male!Reader #Rosé x Male!Reader

106 notes · View notes

fangirlwriting-stories · 3 years

Text

These Unprecedented Times

Summary: Thomas was currently spending most of his days stewing in his empty house in the middle of the nightmare that is 2020 and wishing he had someone to talk to. Apparently, his brain listened to him though, or he's just finally lost it, because suddenly standing across the room is someone that looks like a half-snake version of him.

Or, In Which Thomas Is So Bad At Taking Care of Himself That He Accidentally Summons His Self-Preservation.

AO3 Link

Chapter One: Self-Interest

Thomas was running pretty dry on video ideas, and he had no idea why. It was like all his motivation for creating had been sapping away as lockdown continued. It was frustrating to no end, and he couldn’t seem to muster up the will to even try and fix the problem. And with a lack of ideas in that regard, he was stuck thinking about everything that was going on, all of the disease and the death and the nightmares that this year had been bringing. He tried to stay as up to date as possible in case something new had happened, but with that and all the thoughts already invading his head from information he already knew, he just grew more and more anxious about the world’s situation until he forced himself off of social media and tried to do something relaxing. Unfortunately, that usually only lasted about half an hour before he started feeling guilty about not being up to date and even trying to enjoy himself with everything that was going on.

He texted and facetimed with his friends as often as he could, but most of the time he was alone, and stewing in everything by himself wasn’t that great either. The only real person-to-person contact he got was when he went out walking, and learned to understand why dogs got so excited when they saw each other.

But he was fine! He was lucky. He wasn’t an essential worker, after all, and he didn’t have to risk his life to make a paycheck. He should be grateful that he got to stay home, relatively safe, and all he had to do to have the money for groceries was to come up with ideas for videos, which he should be able to do with no problem. He was fine. He just needed to push through whatever this funk was and come up with an idea.

Thomas tapped his pencil against the blank notebook page and tried to force himself not to groan.

If only there was someone he could talk to.

“Thomas!”

Thomas yelped and spun towards the voice. He was met with a bizarre half-snake man that looked remarkably like him. Before Thomas could process the seven shades of what the fuck that was happening, the half-snake man marched across the room and yanked him up by the color.

“Thomas, you son of a— I can’t let this go on anymore,” the snake-man snapped, shaking Thomas back and forth, which Thomas didn’t really appreciate all that much. “Do you know what I am?”

“Uh, I mean at this point I’d rather like to—” Thomas started.

“I am exhausted! All of your efforts to convince yourself that you’re okay while there is goddamn global trauma going on are cutting into my self care time! You’ve made me get sick of you lying to yourself. Me! So look me in the eyes, Sanders. You. Are. Not. Okay. Admit it.”

“What— I don’t— oh god.” Thomas pushed the snake-man off and started scrambling backwards. “Am I hallucinating? Have I lost it? Oh my god, what do I—”

“You’re not hallucinating,” said the snake-man. Thomas looked back up at him to see him looking calmer and maybe just a bit sheepish. “I probably should have done that a different way, but I don’t know how else I’m supposed to get through to you at this point—” He sighed. “I am a product of your mind and personality. Though I suppose I do lack a physical form.”

“That… that just raises more questions…” Thomas said weakly.

“Absolutely none of which are important to address right now compared to what you are doing to yourself, Thomas.”

“How would you even know—”

The snake-man sighed. “Look, I’m a… Side, of you, if you will. Specifically, the Side meant to look out for your own interests. Your bank account, your reputation, your self-esteem. But instead of all of that, what I’ve been spending 24 freaking 7 doing lately is trying to tell you that everything is fine when we’re in the middle of a fucking pandemic with a president who barely acknowledges it’s a problem, which means I have to spend hours every day trying to get your Anxiety to not have a panic attack, and even that is barely working at this point!”

Thomas swallowed, trying to process all of that. The… Side in front of him seemed to be more than willing to give him a moment to do so. But even at the end of that, all that came out of Thomas’ mouth was, “…oh.”

The Side buried his head in his hands and gave a slightly hysterical laugh. “‘Oh,’ he says,” he mumbled to himself.

“Wait,” Thomas said as an idea came to him. “What do you mean, getting my Anxiety to not have a panic attack? Don’t you mean give me a—”

“I said what I said, Sanders,” the Side said, shifting and crossing his arms. “You think your fight or flight reflex is doing any better than I am right now? I’m sure he’d be delighted to hear that you think so after running himself ragged trying to keep you up with the constantly changing safety measures.”

“My fight or flight? Wait, is he that or my—”

“His role is to keep you safe,” the Side cut him off. “Meaning he’s the part of you in charge of that particular set of responses. His current title is Anxiety, and I think you can take a few guesses as to why.”

“His… title? I’m sorry, this is a lot to process,” Thomas said, leaning back on the couch and rubbing at his temple.

The Side’s gaze softened. “I’m sorry, Thomas,” he said gently. “I don’t mean to be so intense right off the bat. To be honest, I’m rather stressed, and I… did not expect this to happen. Being able to speak to you was not something I ever considered would be possible.”

“Yeah, I think I’m with you there,” Thomas said, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. “I never expected to talk to a part of my personality face to face. Are you sure I’m not hallucinating?”

“You’re not,” the Side said, looking amused. “I believe I was summoned here because you needed me.”

“I just wanted someone to talk to,” Thomas muttered.

“That’s completely understandable,” the Side said. He moved forward and gestured to the empty couch. “May I sit?”

“Uh, okay,” Thomas said, shifting to face the Side as he did so. “Can I ask some questions now?”

“We probably should slow down for a minute,” the Side said with a nod. “What are your questions?”

“Uh…” Thomas wasn’t quite sure where to start. He could certainly say he hadn’t expected to meet this “Side” of himself today. He didn’t even know how this worked, or what to call this Side, or—

Oh. Maybe that was a place to start?

“What should I call you?” Thomas asked.

“The title I would prefer is Self-Interest.”

Thomas nodded. “Self-Interest. Okay. And Anxiety. Is it just the two of you?”

“No, there are others.” Self-Interest shook his head. “Don’t even get me started on what Intrusive Thoughts is doing to the mindscape right now.”

Thomas furrowed his brow. “Okay, hold up. You’re saying that all of these ‘Sides’ represent different parts of my personality?”

Self-Interest raised an eyebrow. “I thought we clarified this already.”

“No, I mean, why are you explaining to me everything that’s going on with them? Shouldn’t I just be talking to them directly?”

Self-Interest snorted. “Oh, yes, you’re definitely ready for that. You won’t even admit that you’re not okay, and you want to meet your Intrusive Thoughts.”

“Wh— why do I even have a whole side for Intrusive Thoughts? Anxiety I can get, but—”

“It’s… complicated,” Self-Interest said. “Technically he’s part of your Creativity, but, well, let’s just say there’s two Sides to that. Creative thoughts you welcome, and ones you… don’t. As much.”

“Well, can he start working on ones I want to have again? YouTube is basically my only source of income right now, since I can’t do any auditions for shoots or plays. If I don’t come up with an idea soon, I’ll be in trouble.”

Self-Interest blinked at him. “You… want me to tell Intrusive Thoughts… what to do.”

“Well, yeah,” Thomas said. Had he explained it wrong or something?

Self-Interest looked at him for another long moment. “Sure, I’ll get right on that. Good luck getting him away from diseases and death right now, though, that’s basically all you’ve been exposing us to lately. Which connects back to my main point.” Self-Interest leaned in. “Stop trying to pretend you’re okay, and stop avoiding things that are going to actually make you feel better.”

“What…” Thomas said, not quite sure what Self-Interest was referring to.

“I get it, it’s hard to stop telling yourself you’re alright. That’s sort of my fault. But we’re not going to get anywhere like this.” Self-Interest paused. “You know what, I have a better idea. Give me that.”

Self-Interest reached over Thomas and grabbed the TV remote from the coffee table, flipping the TV on. “Oh, are we watching the news?” Thomas asked, settling in next to him.

“Ha. Nope. We’re watching Disney movies.”

Thomas blinked. “But—”

“Thomas, we both desperately need a self care day. Watching Disney will help you, and helping you will help me. We’re doing this. Sit back and relax. If you’d like, I’ll allow you to make some popcorn first.”

“Uh… I’m good,” Thomas said. Normally he’d start feeling guilty the moment he started considering doing something just for his enjoyment with everything that was happening, but for some reason the feeling felt sort of… muted right now. Maybe it was the fact that Self-Interest was there?

Either way, Thomas leaned back into the couch as Self-Interest started playing The Little Mermaid and relaxed for the first time in a while. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad.

Chapter Two

#sanders sides #thomas sanders #janus sanders #my fic

21 notes · View notes

hummingbird-of-light · 2 years

Text

Desideria Praeterita

Part 13

Scotty

Leonard’s words still echoed in his head when he was standing in the kitchen, preparing dinner. Contact his family? How could the Scotsman do that? He had disappeared from their lives six and a half years ago. He had disappointed them like the bad son he was. As a child he made mistakes and as he got older they worsened every time, resulting in him getting together with Khan.

The worst mistake he had ever made.

But Leonard was right. Everything was different now. He wasn’t with Khan anymore. But still, it felt like there was no way for him to reconnect with his past. He didn’t have a number. He didn’t have an address. Maybe his mother and grandfather were still living in Aberdeen. Maybe his brother was too.

So when Scotty sat next to Leonard on the couch where they eventually had decided to enjoy their pizza, he finally muttered exactly what he felt like.

“I… I want to see them. I… miss them. But there is no way I can find them.”

He felt a warm arm wrapping around his shoulders and he snuggled closer to his doctor.

“Didn’t you say they live in Aberdeen?”

Scotty shrugged.

“They still lived there when I left. Who knows where they are today…”

A hand touched his face and made him look up. And there it was. That beautiful soft smile of Dr. Leonard McCoy, gorgeous eyes staring back at him.

“Listen here, if you want it I‘ll travel with you to Aberdeen all the way. We will search for them there. And if we don’t find them? Hell! We’ll search all of Scotland.“

Tears filled Scotty’s eyes as he heard his love talking. Leonard would really do all that for him?

“That’s too much to ask of you.”

He turned his head away but Leonard moved it back with one hand on Scotty’s cheek.

“You’re not asking it of me. I am suggesting it. So please… if it’s what you want… just say yes.”

Scotty looked at him for a while.

“I can’nae tell you yet. I… I’ll have to think about it.”

With that they fell silent, focusing on the movie again that they were watching.

But Scotty would think about his love’s words for the next hours, maybe even days.

What should he do?

Part 14

McCoy

McCoy lay awake. Scotty was asleep, with his head on McCoy’s shoulder. He was surprised Scotty had made a decision about his family. He had expected the engineer to think it over for a few days. His heart ached to think how much Scotty must miss them.

His own family was across the country, but he still spoke to them regularly. McCoy just couldn’t fathom not speaking to his mom for seven years. He let out a sigh. Scotty shifted slightly but kept sleeping. McCoy turned his head to peep at Scotty’s face. He looked so peaceful and McCoy hoped it would last all night.

His thoughts turned back to Scotty’s family. Would it really be that hard to find them? There had to be an easier way than flying there and knocking on doors. It was most likely they still lived in the same place. Though, he reminded himself, many things could have happened in seven years.

Scotty shifted again and made a small noise. McCoy lifted his hand and began rubbing circles on his back. He felt some tension dissolve under his fingers.

If Scotty knew their last address, it could be a simple search, right? There had to be a directory or phone book or something online they could consult. Even social media could be used. McCoy had no use for it, but maybe Jim could be helpful that way.

Another sound came from the sleeping engineer and McCoy pulled him closer, then continued rubbing his back. Lord he hoped Scotty wasn’t going to have another nightmare. They had been happening more frequently.

“Shh darlin’,” he barely whispered. “I’m here, it’s alright.” He pressed a gentle kiss to Scotty’s forehead.

He’d been through so much, couldn’t his dreams at least give him some peace?

Another sigh escaped McCoy. Scotty was such a gentle person and he cared so much. McCoy had never felt such complete love from another person or towards someone else. Jim might laugh at them for being ‘romantic’ or ‘cheesy’ or ‘too much’ but it was all true and genuine from both of them.

McCoy could spend the whole night thinking through ‘if onlys;’ if only they had met sooner, if only he could have helped more the first time they met, if only, if only. He didn’t think that though. He simply thought about what they had ahead of them and a smile graced his face.

He kept his hand rubbing Scotty’s back, but closed his eyes and let himself fully relax. Soon he’d be asleep and tomorrow he could look into finding Scotty’s family, if Scotty wanted to go find them.

#star trek #montgomery scott #dr leonard mccoy #scones #au #desideria praeterita

4 notes · View notes

kagesdumpsterfire · 2 years

Note

I don't believe he intended to make a joke. It wasn't a joke full stop. He couldn't have known the fan would have said he didn't raise his hand. I think he was trying to be dismissive and not give a real answer (accidently giving one) because his plan was to adress the SPN bi fans and he didn't want to make it about himself. I think he was about to show support to those fans and fudged up then got too embarrassed to do the right thing right away. He still did and does a lot for us.

Oh, no I get you completely. I do not think he meant it in a malicious way. I know he does a lot for the community. He's actually done a lot for me personally. I wouldn't have half the courage to be myself today if it weren't for Misha. I don't mean to shame him one bit. I just feel that mistake or not we can't not hold him accountable. It was a little bit his own fault. But he apologized and took accountability and that shows a lot about him as a person. I still adore the man, it hurt being bi myself and dealing with a load of biphobia in my life, but you can't expect everyone to know and understand your struggles and you can't blame them for it. He has been so supportive of us and I am grateful for that. Everyone has room to grow and learn.

I just didn't want to see a bunch of people going around saying everyone who is a little upset has no right to be. Or shaming the ones who talked about it and saying they are the only people to blame. That misha is a saint. He's an amazing guy and incredibly talented and caring, but he is human and makes mistakes. But he should be allowed to make those mistakes, because he is human. I can't imagine the pressure of having every dumb thing that came out of my mouth making LITERAL People magazine or tending on social media. I'm sure hes been living a nightmare.

I hope that doesn't sound mean to him in any way. That is not my intention. He took his accountability and we should let him stick to it.

Anyway, at this point I'm just laughing at the memes and enjoying my life. It's not worth stressing myself out for.

I hope you have a good day anon, truly, and thank you for your thoughts.🌞

#misha collins #anon ask #not anon hate for once #shocked

5 notes · View notes

chainofclovers · 3 years

Text

Yesterday was great!

Like many mornings, I woke up early and drank coffee and worked on my queer little Ted Lasso story

Had a productive and meaningful workday

Like many people in many spots around the country this year, protested at the school board as a part of a counter protest against a white supremacist anti-trans/anti-“Critical Race Theory” protest planned at a meeting that did not even have CRT on the agenda but did have an item about transgender youth sports participation

It was phenomenal to be around more queer people than I’ve seen in person since sometime in 2019, and the group pulling together the protest was pretty organized so we drowned out a lot of the “colorblind” (or, you know, white supremacist) USA bullshit...have u ever stood in a crowd of people of many races and genders and sexualities all just cracking up because a dude is shrieking “USA!” into a megaphone at you? Like, what country are we in, then?

(Got interviewed on the local news because I was very fired up and agreed to be quoted, tried not to think about it after because it started out well but devolved in the feeling of “I have blacked out and I have no idea what I’m saying to these increasingly rapid-fire questions about what I read on social media about ~~~CRITICAL RACE THEORY~~~ oh no this isn’t good”)

Did yoga watched TV ate pie snuggled cats learned some Spanish kept livin’ my life

Board of education voted on policy to ensure trans kids can participate in sports in line with their gender identity!

Today, though, OMG

Checked out local news and instead of using my whole semi-articulate explanation that as a community we have a responsibility to show up when people threaten the safety and well-being of children?!?!? They have me on the news saying I want racism and trans stuff taught in school because I support that, basically 🤢🤢🤢

I mean, of course

Would have been super cool if they’d not edited out the part where I make it very clear that I was there for ANTI-RACIST and PRO-TRANS COMMUNITY reasons instead of editing it down to one grammatical nightmare that flew unbidden from my mouth

But it’s their MO to get people sounding as flustered and uneducated as possible

They totally got me stressed, too...started by giving me space to explain my presence, then started grilling me about social media posts until I lost my ability to think

And hopefully people understand that this tiny clip was taken somewhat out of context and I was talking about making sure our curriculum actually covers all people’s history accurately :(

But I just wanna crawl into a hole

Also I have to do a medical thing today that I do not want to do! But it should be over by noon-ish!

How am I expected to write my queer little Ted Lasso story and have a productive and meaningful workday when I feel this idiotic (and medical anxiety-y?)

It’s not even 8 a.m.

#do NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT reblog #personal #about me #more emotions than livejournal dot com #didn't know i needed a full media training before attending a protest at the school board #cw transphobia #cw racism

21 notes · View notes

astraljedi · 4 years

Text

Coffee Crush (Evan Buckley)

A/N: first of all, I’m buck trash. I’ve been watching 911 with my roommate since season two aired, and I’ve been trying to fight it. But here I am, posting an Evan Buckley imagine. Secondly, I wrote this in a day? Who am I? Thirdly, we need more buck imagines.

Summary: Evan might be obsessed with a coffee shop, or a certain employee.

Warnings: none? Probably some bad writing.

Pairing: reader, she/her

____

Coffee never failed to bring people together, whether it was decaf or not. People enjoyed a hot cup of coffee or an iced cold-brewed coffee with their loved ones at any time of the day.

That's why Y/N had decided to open up Mamá Linda’s Coffee shop. Of course, Los Angeles had hundreds of know coffee chains around de City. But it didn’t stop her from owning her place, she fought hard for it and gave it her all until she finally made it.

It always packed all day, and she was on her feet since early in the morning until late at night. There wasn't a day where she wasn’t helping her staff on the bar and behind the kitchen. She was an all-hands in kind of woman.

Week 1

The job was exhausting, but a day never passed by that wasn't full of some entertainment—especially this week in particular.

“Y/N, we have a 10 in uniform,” Selena whispered to her while calling the shots for the current drink she had. They all spoke in codes, and a ten means someone attractive was in the shop. “Those piercing blue eyes could make me forget that I’m a married woman.”

Selena always made her day with her commentary during shifts and even of them during text or calls. She was a woman full of surprises.

“He’s lost looking at the menu.” Y/N chuckled, watching him wrinkle his nose in confusion. He was wearing a black firefighter uniform like he just came off his shift or was heading there. “He looks cute.”

She found it adorable, and without notice, she had a small smile splattered on her face. The cute firefighter turned his attention back to the line and caught Y/N’s eyes staring back at him. He must have felt someone was staring at him.

Blushing uncontrollably, he smirked at her playfully. He loved flirting, and he walked around, knowing he could get any girl.

Not knowing what to do with herself, she lowered her head embarrassed and ended up spilling the steaming hot milk from her pitcher on the counter and on to her apron. Y/N’s hands were now shaking as her team watched her with wide eyes, surprised with her clumsiness. She wasn’t like this at all.

The metal pitcher fell to the floor, hushing the packed shop with the remaining milk spilling on the ground as clients looked around for the source of the accident. It made it worse for her when all her usual clients were staring at her, they were worried, but she thought they were judging her.

“Y/N, get yourself cleaned up. We can handle it here.” Selena rubbed her Y/N’s shoulders while she nodded her head in agreement quietly. Darian was already cleaning up the counter while she walked away quietly towards the back. After all that, Y/N didn’t even dare to look back at the firefighter. She felt embarrassed at how nervous and shaky she got over just one smirk.

And if it couldn’t go worse, he became a regular after that.

Week 2

The second week was torture; now she knew his name after Selena had told her a few days ago when she finally caught his name for his order. Now, Harry, one of her other employees, had found him on social media during a late stalking session. He had a crush too.

“Evan hasn’t come in today, and maybe he couldn’t come by before work or after his gym session.” Harry frowned, leaning against the marble countertop after he finished with his last customer on the line. It was around 10 am, which meant a little breathing room for the team to relax from the morning rush hour.

“Did you get his social security number while you were stalking the poor guy?” Y/N chuckled, working on the pastry case. She had made the perfect Tres Leches in the morning that she thought it deserved a spot on the pastry case for others to see the newest treat on the menu.

“I only found about his family, his ex-girlfriend, and where he works. It wasn’t a full-on stalk since I know you called dibs first.” Y/N turned around, glaring at him after she closed the pantry door.

“I did not call dibs on him.”

“Well, you did spill your pitcher full of steaming milk after the poor guy tried to flirt with you. Which you never spill your pitcher, you can do this in your sleep cupcake.” Harry added as Selena had joined them in the bar.

“I’m with Harry on this, and you did say he looked cute that day,” Selena added, drying the white plated she brought from the back.

“I did not spill because of him. I just had too much caffeine that day that I was bouncing all over the place.” Y/N tried to get her self out of it; she didn’t even want to be in the topic from the first place. “Just because I find a guy attractive doesn’t mean I want to date him.”

“You’re saying that I’m not datable?” And if her nightmare couldn't have become worst. Evan was standing behind the pastry case, gym bag over his shoulders, and a tank that left his muscular biceps the main lead of the show.

It was like deja vu. Y/N’s blushing cheeks were hard to cover as he smiled back at her. He knew she was avoiding him since the milk incident, and he finally caught her. And even better, she was talking about him with her friends.

“I see you have become a regular now.” Was that the first thing she said to him? Yeah, rude.

“What can I say? I love coffee and scenery.” Evan flirted again, knowing he made her nervous.

“Well, I think Harry knows your usual so that he will make it for you.” And as expected, Harry was already finishing his order at the end of the bar. “As a thank you for your support, it's on the house.”

Harry smiled widely at Evan as he handed the coffee cup to Evan over the counter. “Won’t your boss get mad for giving away free coffee?” Evan added before taking a sip of his drink.

“The good thing is that I’m the owner.” Y/N smirked back at him before turning around and walking towards the backroom. She looked over her shoulder, thinking she pulled off the last move, but he didn’t fail to wink back at her before Evan left the shop.

Week 3

After her last conversation with Evan, she did see him a couple of times after. And she finally learned his usual order. It was a black coffee with a splash of unsweetened almond milk topped with some cinnamon.

She did get used to seeing his face around. He did seem to enjoy the coffee. “Hey, sweet face, you’re early today.” Y/N leaned against the counter, already having his order ready for him in front of her.

“Now, you’re giving me nicknames?” He did enjoy the coffee, but he loved it the most when she greeted him with her sweet smile. He had gotten her to open up to him these couple of days, and he was happy about it. She brightened up his day.

“You just always have a sweet smile, like a toddler. Always so full of life, energy, and happiness.” And she wasn’t shy anymore on holding back the compliments.

“Then, I will call you freckles.” Evan reached towards Harry to finish paying and looked at her one last time. “You should show your freckles more. They go perfectly with your beautiful smile.” He winked at her and left the store in a hurry for work.

“If you don’t date him, I will.” Selena pushed a blushing Y/N playfully while she still stared at the door even though he was nowhere in sight anymore.

Week 4

“Good Morning Harry, did you watch the game yesterday?” Evan chatted with Harry, his eyes scanning the shop for a particular face.

“I did, and after that game, I’m embarrassed to even be from here. What a disaster it was.” Harry shrugged his shoulders, giving Evan his change. “She’s not here, she came down with the horrible flu and couldn’t risk getting all of us sick.”

“Oh, I was looking forward to seeing that smile today.” Evan frowned, placing a tip in the jar on the counter. “It was nice seeing you. Take care.”

“He looked sad when he walked in today,” Selena said, while Harry agreed.

Week 5

After spending some time in bed and being miserable at home with the flu, Y/N was finally on her feet and feeling better. The first day back and she was excited to head back to her second home, and especially to see that special someone.

But that morning, he didn’t show up at all. It was like the universe didn’t want her to see him today.

“He did come yesterday, right?” Y/N asked Selena, tapping her fingers on the counter, worrying about him. She had a feeling something was wrong, especially after Selena has told her that morning that he had been looking rough the couple of times he had come in.

“He did, he still had the sad puppy eyes, but he did order your tres leches again,” Selena confirmed, handing Y/N a warm cup of tea. Y/N felt terrible, he did leave his number for her with Harry, but she just didn’t have the courage to text first.

Maybe she was crazy, but she missed his smile and his contagious laughter while she was gone. She was looking forward to seeing him again, but she might have sent the wrong signal by not texting or even calling him after he left his number.

“I’m going for a drive, think you can stay in charge until I get back?” Y/N placed the cup on the counter and folded up one of the to-go boxes.

“If you’re going to do what I think you're going to do, then I can.” Selena chuckled, helping Y/N place the whole Tres Leches in the box.

She had driven past the station a few times before she even knew him, so thankfully, she knew the way and didn’t need to waste more time by searching it on her GPS. It was a 10-minute ride, and with her luck, traffic was lighter than usual.

“Should I call him and tell him that I’m here?” She thought, looking at the intimidating station. With her shaking hands, she built up the courage and stepped out of her car with her other hand holding on to the box.

“I bet I look pathetic.” And again, the little voice in her head returned. Her eyes wandered the area, and she only spotted a pair of legs working behind the ambulance. Hesitant, she made her way towards the figure as she held tightly on to the box in her hands. “Hi, excuse me.” She felt so small and intimidated her voice cracked a bit at the end.

“How can I help you, ma'am.” She felt so bad about interrupting him while he was just trying to do his job.

“Sorry to bother you, is Evan here? I don’t know if this is the right station-“

“Oh yeah, he’s here.” He smiled a little too friendly and immediately started shouting Evan’s name until an annoyed Evan came marching from what looked like a locker room.

“Han, why in the world are you screaming?” Buck groaned, but it took him a second to realized what was happening.

“This kind woman was asking for you.” Han smiled at Y/N kindly. Buck’s eyes widened, and his cheeks we're madly blushing when he spotted her standing right behind Han. And of course, Y/N had been blushing since he had walked out of the lockers.

“This is for all of you; I made it this morning.” Y/N held out the box, and Han didn’t hesitate to grab it from her hands.

“She brings us treats. She’s a keeper, Buck.” Han said a little too loud as he climbs up the stairs towards the small kitchen.

“I’m sorry if I’m overstepping. I got worried when you didn’t come in, and I just had a bad feeling. I needed to make sure you were alright.” Y/N rambled, her hands moving around like crazy as she tried to explain her actions. “I don’t know if you’re just nice, but I’m pretty sure we were flirting all of this time, and I just needed to see you.” With her rambling all over the place, she didn’t even notice how Buck was walking towards her slowly.

“I wanted to see you too.” Evan chuckled, grabbing her by the waist, finally pulling her closer to his body for the first time. The heat radiating between the two met as Buck lowered down to her height to catch her lips with his.

In complete shock, Y/N’s widened at first but slowly shut them as she kissed him back. It was slow and sweet, how he imagined it to be. One of Y/N’s hands found its way towards his bicep, resting on the muscle even after he had pulled away to look at her glistening eyes. “Just as good as your coffee,” Evan mumbled, pecking her lips a few times.

They were in their little bubble until wolf whistles and cheers coming from the balcony above them. “You can come to visit us at any time if you bring more goodies as good as this dessert,” Han said with a mouth full of food. A woman standing right next to him slapped him in the shoulder, rolling his eyes at him. “Excuse my partner. He gets a little too happy over food.”

“I’ll bring more next time.” Y/N giggled as Buck held her between his arms.

#evan buckley #evan buckley imagine #evan buckley imagines #911 fic #911 imagines #911 imagine

487 notes · View notes

handlewithkara · 3 years

Text

@supercorpizgaybaiting heavily, but also not exclusively. It's not like Karadox or Karamel fans aren't also more or less secretly hoping that things could stil go their way or even Superdey fans were hopeful at some pepole. People are going to disagree what counts as subtext.

In the end, if writers put subtext there intentionally (and I know of at least one instance of a writer saying no in twitter to a claim about one of his episodes) then you don’t have to fight for your couple, the writers intend to do them as a couple anyway. However if the writers don’t want to do your couple because they are not feeling them, then they are not going to do them. And trying to force them is not going to lead to good results.

Take let’s say Mon-El being given Kara’s necklace or Mon-El giving Kara his Legion ring. Would you deny that those are traditional romantic signifiers, the kind of thing that would make a fan expect that those signifiers will come back in a way? Same with the long look and little quirky smile Kara gave Mon-El in episode 100. And yet at the same time there is a chance that they won’t be in a romantic context.

Same for let’s say Karadox fan who for example saw something special in the recent Kara and Brainy balcony scene.

Or who can point to a writer actually confirming that he wrote a Brainy scene back in season 3 as a potential tease of Karadox (the scene where Mon-El leaves the scene and Brainy walks in instead). Does that mean that Kara and Brainy have to end up as a couple? Because there is a good chance they won’t.

Because writers change, storylines change. There is no proof that something somebody wrote in season 3 was ever a promise that it would be back and even if it was meant as a promise it’s no proof that the completely different writers team feels any obligation to cash in the promise a writer who isn’t even with the show anymore made in season 3.

To me “baiting” is not a replacement for an actual storyline. If writers want to do a story, they will write that story. Point blank.

The complaint here has always been that about the supposed claims of baiting has been that they have never been exclusive. Ie, some scenes have paralleled Lois and Clark scenes from other media but:

1.) The show literally starts out with the show co-opting and reinterpreting and reinacting traditional Superman, including Superman and Lois scenes redoing them with Kara and Alex. And yet you don’t see as many people insisting the show HAS to do romantic Kara and Alex even though the show literally starts out with them reinacting and reinterpreting two iconic Superman and Lois scenes (Kara saving Alex on the plane, kid Kara taking Alex flying).

2.) A lot of supposed parallel scenes are really generic scenes that exist either for other characters on Supergirl as well (ie Kara saving somebody in a helicopter, Kara carrying somebody bridal style) or they also exist for Superman and non romantic characters.

Again, baiting or supposed baiting is not a replacement for an actual storyline. Watch Xena and Gabrielle. Xena and Gabrielle weren’t baiting, it was writers writing a full fledged story that they cared deeply about.

This is what writers do when they really want to do a couple but are denied by a network to make it explicit. They write stuff about a kiss that is necessary to the plot somehow. Twice! They write crazy scenarios where Xena and Gabrielle are turned into vampires and bite each other. They write crazy scenarios where the plot forces them to dance sexily with each other. They find ways. (and yes even they even though they agreed with the shippers about the importance of Xena and Gabrielle’s relationship, still disagreed with the fans when it came to weighing the importance of that story against the importance of Xena’s redemption journey)

I never bought the claim that the same constraints that existed during Xena and Gabrielle still hold true today or that they hold true on this particular show (does lgbt stories for other characters) or network (has tons of lgbt shows including multiple shows with lgbt leads). And with Xena and Gabrielle you can see what writers do exactly when they are under constraints. It was deep, heartfelt storylines with lots of screentime not arguments about what color socks the characters are wearing.

Kara recently had a line within the show “Who cares about the ratings?” and I’m pretty sure that this is actually reflective of how the writers of the show feel right now. They know that doing social awareness stories about a black lesbian or a trans superhero maybe are not going to get them the gangbuster ratings, but they are going to do it anyway because at this point they don’t care about the ratings and it is something they firmly believe is the right thing to do. It is something they are passionate about.

If they are not writing couple X, then so me that per se implies they are not passionate enough about them. And you can’t force love. You can’t force them to be passionate about it. Either they are feeling or they don’t.

There are a lot of instances where people read things into a situation and they shouldn't have.

See the only thing I disagree with here is whether the onus on that is on the audience or on the writers. Especially when I would argue there are tons of cases where fans clearly ignore “anti-bait” moments. ie the show returns and Lena is busy with Lex while Alex is the one obssessed with bringing back Kara. Everybody has a nightmare and Lena’s has nothing to do with Kara. Kara and Lena’s reuinion is not a topic at all where Kara first reconnects with the group. . Lena has her soulful conversations with Nia, not Kara. The writers actually can have gone to considerable lenghts to give them the barest minimum to still consititute a storyline that is part of the show and yet people still insist that a moment was baiting. Completely ignoring the context. Let’s hypothetically imagine a world where the writers genuinely don’t want to write them as a romance, but still genuinely want to write them as a meaningful friendship? Where they appreciate Lena as part of the show, they just don’t appreciate her in the future love interest way. Where they still want to write scenes about Lena doing cool and badass scenes, they are just not interested in writing them as a romance.

It just doesn’t strike me as fair that fans should essentially force tie their hands that they aren’t allowed to write any scenes, because no matter what scene they write, fans will insist that it is baiting, even if the scene actually doesn’t stick out compared to all the other scenes they write in a non romantic context for let’s say Kara/Alex, Kara/Brainy or Kara/Nia.

Like let’s say a Karadox fan feeling the balcony scene between Kara and Brainy feeling unfairly like a romantic scene (comnig basically back to back with Kelly and Alex, a romantic couple sharing a balcony scene) completely ignoring the context that people having deep talks on balconies is kind of a staple on Supergirl and Kara has done then with a long list of other characters both characters she was canonically romantically linked with and characters she was never romantically linked with. It’s definitely really nice that Brainy is in the rank of people Kara has great balcony scenes with but that is hardly proof that it has to be read as romantic when Kara has had those type of scenes with J’onn as well.

IMO the fight of the Lenashippers to me has always made more sense to me as “we are a big and loud fanbase, so you have to listen to us” rather than any claims of “we exclusively get scenes that are promises”. Again, if you were exclusively getting promises for your relationship, then you wouldn’t have to fight for it. It would just be the writers foreshadowing a storyline they are intending to do anyway.

In the end, if the writers don’t want to do your story, they are not going to do it. If they are not feeling it, if they don’t see the characters, the potential in the same way, you can’t force them. If “I think we should do a bigass storyline about Nia reconnecting with her mom” is something they feel more passionate about than they feel about developing whatever other relationship, then they don’t feel that passionate about that other relationship, at least not more than they feel about “we should tell cool stories about Nia’s dream powers”.

Because in the end, different people have different preferences and different likes. And you can’t force them to feel the same way you do about characters. There is roughly a million things I wish the show would cover in storylines and that will never happen. Like I think it’s pretty unlikely that the show will do a deep lengthy story on how Alex uses alcolhol in the few episodes we have left, or that they will do a deep dive storyline on Alex’s time before she joined the DEO. Because in the end, I have to accept that the writers just don’t see this topic the same way, just aren’t as interested in it as I am. They likely have a list of things they still want to tackle before the show ends and apparently those things I like or care about are not on that list at all or at least not high enough.

You can’t force people to have exactly the same interests as you.

8 notes · View notes

scripttorture · 4 years

Note

Hello! I've browsed this blog a bit and came across the idea that torturers often develop mental illness because of their repeated exposure to the violence/trauma of seeing another person in pain, which I'd never considered before. A) Do you believe torturers can therefore be a type of victim as well, depending on the circumstances, and therefore deserving of compassion/therapy? B) Can you point me to more information about this/what kinds of mental illnesses develop in torturers? (1/2)

C) Do you think it's possible for a mass murderer/torturer character to have a realistic, satisfying redemption arc? Do you know any media that's pulled it off believably? Thank you so much for taking the time to read/answer this if you do! And for this excellent resource!

The most accessible sources that cover this are O’Mara’s Why Torture Doesn’t Work (good grounding, start with him), Rejali’s Torture and Democracy and the appendices to Fanon’s The Wretched of the Earth where he describes treating two torturers.

The most current research is about 600 pages of print on demand untranslated French. If you’re fluent in French (I am not and lock down etc has got in the way of me getting this translated) Sironi Comment devient-on tortionnaire?

Broadly speaking the symptoms appear to be the same as those survivors and witnesses develop.

And I will go into this in more depth later but keep in mind there is not anywhere near enough research on torturers for us to be entirely sure about most of this. I’m working with the best information we have right now.

The other two questions are subjective and sort of complicated. By definition a lot of this is going to be my opinion because well that’s what you’re asking for.

I think we need to be really careful about describing torturers as ‘victims’.

Yes they’re put in this situation by social structures beyond their control. It is not their fault that they weren’t given training or support in their job. It’s also not their fault that we have this global message that violence is effective or that so many workplaces are unnecessarily pressured/stressful. Most of the time they are drawn in to abusing others because of the social groups and structures within the organisation they join.

Oversight (with a drive to eradicate torture), funding, training and clear consistent messages about the right way to handle difficult situations would probably prevent most cases of torture.

This does not change the fact that on an individual level each of them chose to hurt other people.

Some of them will have made that choice understanding there was a threat to their own safety if they did not. Some of them will have made that choice just because it was what everyone else was doing. Some of them genuinely believe what they did was the ‘right’ decision at the time.

They still made that choice. And given that we have records of people in similar positions refusing, even when it put them at risk of attack or death, I don’t have a lot of sympathy with the choice torturers made.

The fact I’m a pacifist factors into this. Consider my biases.

Torturers typically show a very low understanding of the impact their actions have had on other people.

They might regret their actions but this is typically framed in a very self-centred way. They usually don’t express more then cursory regard for the victims. They regret it because they’re suffering now, because they have nightmares, because they can’t keep a job. And oh it’s all so unfair.

I don’t know why this is the case. But it’s a feature Sironi described in interviews about her work. And I’ve seen it over and over again in interviews with torturers.

Yes torturers suffer. The symptoms they develop are terrible and have a lasting impact on their lives. They typically can’t hold down jobs and struggle to re-integrate into society in any meaningful fashion.

And yes I believe they should be treated. I believe that anyone with a disease or condition which requires treatment should have access to care and treatment. Whoever they are. Whatever they did.

I believe that as fellow human beings torturers are entitled to a degree of compassion. When I say that torture and mistreatment are wrong I mean it. My position doesn’t change just because the theoretical victim is a former torturer.

I do not think that treatment and compassion should be dependant on a person being suitably victimised. For me the only thing it depends on is their need and their humanity. In the literal physical sense of them being a human.

But we tend to think of ‘victim’ as a simple category that doesn’t overlap with mass murderers.

And I don’t believe the position of torturers is that simple.

Especially when so few of them are charged. Torture trials are rare. Convictions are rare. And sentences are short.

And their victims deserve justice too.

I feel conflicted about calling torturers ‘victims’ because of this complex reality. And because in fiction we have a tendency to focus on the torturers prioritising their voices over the survivors. I feel like presenting torturers as simple victims of society could risk adding to that.

For me the focus has always got to be the survivors.

And I think all of this feeds into how we handle redemption arcs.

I don’t think that writing redemption arcs for villains, even torturers or mass murderers is ‘wrong’. In fact I think that it can be a really good idea. Showing how toxic the environments these people are in is a good thing. Puncturing the way it’s romanticised is a good thing. And showing a way out of it, even if it’s imagined, is not a bad thing.

But if we’re going to do that in our stories then I think we need to think about what redemption means and in whose eyes the character is redeemed.

There’s also a small problem: we don’t really know what recovery for torturers looks like.

There isn’t enough research on them. Partly because of lack of interest but partly because the low conviction rates means sample sizes are small. We’re talking about a limited number of individuals who are jailed and we can’t really ‘prove’ that individuals who weren’t convicted were torturers. We don’t really know what the long term outcomes are, what treatments might be effective or- Much of anything.

Studies on torturers are typically based on very small numbers of individuals. (For a long time Fanon’s work was the only example of a mental health professional talking about torturers specifically. He saw two of them.) They are not statistically sound. And a lot of resources were simply journalists or mental health professionals compiling notes on the handful of individuals they talked to.

Everything I say about torturers is based on things like interviews, a handful of studies that have flaws and anecdotal evidence. Unfortunately as of right now it’s the best we’ve got.

Personally I don’t think there’s enough research on torture generally. Or enough attempts to collate relevant research from other fields. But that’s a rant for another day.

Let’s get back to that central question: what does redemption mean?

I think that it’s pretty easy to write a character changing for the better. You can build up the character’s level of insight into what they’re doing/did over the course of the story. You can show them choosing to stop. You can show them shifting to oppose their former allies.

But bundled up in the idea of a redemption arc is this: is it enough? And who is it enough for?

I don’t think survivors should be obliged to forgive former torturers. I also don’t think they’re likely to interact positively.

I’ve talked about this now and again when asked about the difference between legally defined torture and abuse. Because of the organised and widespread nature of legally defined torture there are usually communities of survivors. And communities that are collectively moving through a recovery process because even those people who weren’t directly attacked are likely to be witnesses, carers and relatives or friends of survivors.

These things echo down generations.

Cyprus gained independence from the British in 1960, my father is too young to have any real memory of the violence during the colonial period. But he referenced it in arguments with my English mother during my childhood. There are people throughout China today who won’t buy anything Japanese because of Japanese war crimes there during World War 2. There are people who won’t eat fish from the Black Sea, because the bodies of their ancestors were thrown into that sea during a genocide over a hundred years ago.

I know that as a both a Greek Cypriot and an English person there are people all over the world who will not want anything to do with me based on what my people have done to theirs. And the fact I wasn’t alive at the time does not really factor into it.

What I’m trying to illustrate here is that this is much bigger, broader and more complex then individual acts of forgiveness.

Survivors are a highly varied group of individuals. And each torturer can have thousands or tens of thousands of victims. Expecting each impacted individual, and any witnesses and all their family members and friends, to forgive these people is… let’s say ‘unlikely’.

So does redemption require forgiveness from the wounded party? Is there any possible action that can atone for the sheer scale of these atrocities?

If we play a simple number game causing this level of harm can be achieved in months or years, but saving the equivalent number of lives takes decades of skilled, dedicated work. If we look at concepts like wergild or jail as ‘paying your debt to society’ then how do we measure something like torture where the numbers are so big?

I haven’t seen a piece of fiction seriously tackle these questions. But then again I also haven’t actively looked for that fiction.

I feel like a lot of fictional redemption arcs judge a character to be sufficiently redeemed based on audience sympathy and the main cast forgiving the character. They don’t typically go on to broaden the scope of the narrative and question whether any one else impacted by the former villain’s actions also sees the character as redeemed.

One of my stories has a former torturer as a major character and I think they are a sympathetic character in many ways. I think that my readers would empathise with them through a lot of the story (which takes place decades after they stopped torturing).

They’re a mentor figure to some of the younger cast members. They’ve acted as a protector to them and taught the younger generation a lot about the minority culture they themselves are from. And they do genuinely care about these people that they helped to raise, consistently sacrificing to protect these ‘kids’. (The ‘kids’ are 30s-20s at the time of the story.)

But they’re also incredibly self centred. They don’t really interact with or have a lot of sympathy for the people they hurt. And while this particular family loves and forgives them society at large views them as a monster. Albeit one that is now leashed.

Is this a redemption story? Is this character redeemed? I genuinely don’t know. In fact that’s part of my interest in writing the story: trying to work out if there is a point, as this character grows, develops and helps others, when I believe they’ve done ‘enough’.

I think that redemption means different things for different people. A satisfying redemption story is different for different people. And if we can disagree so strongly about it with much simpler, smaller scale crimes then where does that leave us with torture?

There isn’t a simple answer or a one-size-fits-all writing solution. There can’t be.

My approach is to try and use the story to see if I can find an answer. Even if it’s only a limited one. For me the story itself is a forum for exploring human complexity and difficult ethical questions.

I don’t think we have a good solution for how to deal with these people in reality yet. But I do hold out hope that a good solution is possible. Fiction is an arena where we can safely explore possible solutions.

I guess in the end I’m not sure if there’s any story or arc that will work for everyone. I don’t think there are any hard rules for writing anything and I don’t think there’s ever a way to please everyone.

Redemption and forgiveness are complicated topics. I think we do a much better job when we engage with that complexity then when we assume a character just has to do a, b and c in order to achieve it.

When you consider someone to be truly redeemed is an ethical question that I can’t answer for you. I don’t think I should. The chances are you’ll know when you think your character has done enough.

Just be open to the fact that it won’t be enough for everyone. Consider reflecting that with the characters, because that can make for truly powerful moments.

In Midnight’s Children Shiva never forgives Saleem, even though Saleem isn’t responsible for Shiva ‘losing’ his life and family because they were both infants at the time. And damn there are a lot of flaws in the movie adaptation but that scene between them in the jail, when Saleem throws that in Shiva’s face hits hard. It shows us so much about both characters.

And I think that’s a better way to approach it then trying to figure out if a character is redeemed yet: figuring out how they’ve progressed, how others respond to that progression and why.

I hope that helps :)

Available on Wordpress.

Disclaimer

184 notes · View notes

blueluneacy · 4 years

Text

Confessions

AAAAAAAAND WE DID IT BOYS! Yes, I am posting this late. no, I do not care. it’s the TA!Jotaro/reader first place fic!

Word Count: 4k

Also on AO3!

Warnings: not sfw, slight manhandling, bratty ass reader, slight dubcon if you squint, cumming inside

Maybe this wasn't the best outfit to wear to lecture. It really did fit rather tightly around your ass, and god, if you lifted your arms, half of your torso showed. It really didn’t leave anything to the imagination, but who cared? I mean, maybe, but also, you didn’t care much. I mean, what was the worst that could happen, right? Your TA stares at you the entire class? Newsflash, he does that anyway. It was so obvious that Jotaro Kujo had a thing for you, and it honestly boosted your self confidence at least tenfold. He was attractive, strong, and smart. Anyone attracted to men would want to be with a guy like that, but he kept to himself mostly. If you weren’t more perceptive, or maybe if he wasn’t so weird about it all, then you probably wouldn’t have noticed in the first place. But the way his eyes seemed to keep on you for a moment too long, the way he lingered by your desk for just a moment longer than everyone else, the way he almost seemed to freeze up when he heard your voice, it was all too obvious.

But then, why didn’t Kujo admit it? You were constantly dropping hints at this point that you were interested, often loudly talking about how you were single and looking for a partner while you knew Jotaro was in earshot, but he wouldn’t bite. Not that you were interested in him or anything… Well, that’s a lie. You totally were interested in him, but Jotaro was interested in you first, so he had to be the one to admit that he liked you. Those were the rules. Totally.

But, alas, you didn’t have much time to really consider the pros and cons of your outfit. You only had Kujo’s discussion today, thank god. It should be a crime to have class on Friday anyway, not to mention that it was at ten in the morning. It should be illegal to have a class this early. Yes, you were at this point nocturnal, but you were also in college. You don’t exist before noon. So naturally, you were up getting ready for your class way later than when you told yourself at three AM last night, and you kind of had to get a move on. You already had forfeited a real breakfast, stuffing bagels into your backpack and eating them during your discussion would have to do.

So you headed off on the uneventful walk to your class. Thank god it wasn’t on the other side of campus, otherwise you probably wouldn’t have come for most of the semester. It was always such a hassle to get all the way over there, you didn’t want to deal with it. You couldn’t remember if you actually checked where this class was when you signed up for it, so you couldn’t be certain if this was some sort of foresight on your sight, or just plain luck. Either way, you got to the classroom pretty quickly, sitting down exactly 2 minutes before class was supposed to actually start. You snagged a seat towards the back so you could eat your bagels in peace, but still seem like you were totally paying attention. Jotaro’s eyes on you didn’t go unnoticed, but you couldn’t care to comment on them now, too invested in the idea of food as you pulled out your notebook to take notes on whatever was going to be rambled on about. Jotaro stayed on topic with your chapter, but he seemed to have preferences in what he was talking about. You could tell that what he enjoyed talking about and what he didn’t, because it just showed in the way his tone changed based on the topic. But today… Well, you weren’t paying so much attention to what Jotaro was saying, as the tone of his voice. His voice seemed lower than usual, with a strange gravelly quality to it. Was he sick? I mean, his eyes were on you, they tended to be, but they seemed so much more glued onto you than they were before. You took a bite of your bagel, not even remembering the outfit you decided to wear today and the possible effect that it might have on the man you were certain was at least mildly attracted to you. Nah, you were too busy with that damn bagel.

So, you let yourself get lost in the cantor of Jotaro’s voice as he talked about this or that regarding this biology course. Truly, you could care less. He was just spitting out everything that the professor had to say during lecture, so why bother? You had your notes and you were fairly sure you understood everything that was discussed. And if you found when you finally reviewed your notes that you had no idea what was going on, then you could go to the million review sessions that were available to you before the text. It would really be fine, absolutely no worries. And thank god, discussions were only fifty minutes. You told yourself that you were going to go back to your dorm and study after this, but you knew deep in your heart that you were going to scroll through social media for an hour, get an early lunch, and then go back to sleeping until like five, where you would rouse yourself and prepare to forget the entirety of your evening. Well… At least, that was the plan, anyway.

And that was that. Class ended without a hitch, and you slowly started to pack up your stuff. It seemed so tiring to have all these people try to cram information into your head so quickly, but alas. College was needed for basically every job industry these days, there was no way really out of it. That didn’t mean you weren’t going to complain on an almost daily basis though. You were thinking about whether or not bacon was going to be left when Jotaro’s voice cut through your thoughts, forcefully and without shame.

“(Y/n). A word after everyone clears out.” You would smirk at that, but the tone of Jotaro’s voice wasn’t what you expected. It seemed frustrated, almost angry. Oh fuck, what had you done wrong now? What possibly could you have done to get yourself in trouble, the whole time you were just sitting in the back and… Wait, was eating in class allowed? Oh no. Oh god, were you really going to get called out for fucking eating a bagel? Life was truly cruel.

You swallowed as you watched everyone trail out of the room, silently pleading that someone stay, keep you from this nightmare that was confrontation. God, when you said you wanted Jotaro to talk to you, you didn’t mean like this! But everyone left, the door was closed behind Jotaro, and you lugged yourself over to the front of the room to sit across from his teacher’s desk. You didn't even notice how Jotaro locked the door.

“I assume you know why you’re here.” His voice seemed so careful, measured as he sat down, and for once, his piercing eyes made you shrink into your seat. But no, you couldn’t just give in and give up now! You had to be strong! Or, at least act like you were strong.

“Yeah, and I’m not sorry, it was just a bagel, dude. If you have to get your power fantasy from yelling at me for fulfilling a basic need, then maybe see a therapist.” You crossed your arms, vaguely noticing how it pulled your top just a little lower. Jotaro snorted and shook his head, actually amused at how confident you were. About the completely wrong thing, but hey. You really had the spirit.

“You really think I would give a damn about a some stupid bread? You know, I thought you were maybe playing hard to get, but maybe you’re just dense.” He replied, leaving you just a bit shocked. You were so trapped in the euphoria of bread that you forgot you were wearing clothes specifically meant to drive Jotaro wild. “You think I wouldn’t notice your little stunt. I ought to tear off that little outfit and fuck you over this counter like you deserve.” There was a certain growl in Jotaro’s voice that left your knees weak, and you struggled to keep up with the sudden change of demeanor. Maybe you didn’t know Jotaro as well as you liked to think you did, not able to read him as well as previously interpreted. Still, you did your best to pull yourself together, hoping to strike back with some semblance of wit. Even if Jotaro was expressing some sort of feelings for you, you weren’t just going to show all your cards now. Best to keep bluffing and see how the match turns out.

“If that’s what I deserve, I’m not sure I have many objections. But are you actually going to do it, or are you just going to continue to sit there and talk?” You let a smile crawl across your face as Jotaro’s expression got darker, and in what seemed to be instant, he was on the other side of the desk, his lips crashing against yours. You gasped against the kiss, allowing Jotaro to push him tongue into your mouth as his hands reached your hips, grabbing onto them tight. He remained there for a good moment, pulling away when you were finally gasping to put air back in your lungs. He just growled as he used the moment to help pull your top off, throwing it to the side as his eyes took in your form.

“Such a dirty thing, dressing up like that. You like the attention, don’t you? You should only be seen like that by me.” He leaned in to run a hand through your hair as you eagerly moved to unbutton Jotaro’s shirt, ready to get this moving as much as he was. “You’re fucking mine, no one else should be allowed to see you like that.” He replied. You just laughed and hummed as Jotaro shrugged off his coat, ready to bite back just a bit.

“Oh, I’m yours now? I don’t recall that ever being something we agreed upon. Maybe I’m missing something? Like the part where you confessed your feelings to me?” You teased, Jotaro’s freed arm wrapping around you to bring you just a bit closer. It was like if he didn’t hang onto you, you might flutter away, like sand slipping through his fingers, never to return.

“I’ll make you mine then, fuck. You don’t know what you do to me, how many nights I’ve been awake without you there. I love you, you should’ve figured that out by now.” Jotaro grumbled a bit, almost childishly. You paused for a moment, before laughing a bit, shaking your head. God, maybe the reason Jotaro was so quiet was that he never could get out his words in a cool way. When he started talking in a way that wasn’t explicitly planned out, it was almost like he was just saying the first words that came into his brain. Well, maybe he was. Who can say.

“I know. I was just waiting for you to come out and say it. I couldn’t tell if you were shy or just denying your feelings, so I figured I would give you time in case it was the latter.” Well, that was a total lie. You just wanted a cute confession where Jotaro was all blushing and shit, but that was all out the window now anyway, so who cared?

“Liar. You just were being a sadist.” He chuckled a bit, leaving you just to roll your eyes as you slowly moved down to your knees. Well, fuck it. The two of you were horny, and if you were keeping your shirt off, you were at least going to get a little action here.

“Maybe I am. Wouldn’t you like to know?” You replied, moving to unbuckle Jotaro’s belt. Belts? It was confusing. Either way, you got the damn thing unbuckled and moved to Jotaro’s zipper, noticing the massive bulge that was clearly straining against Jotaro’s trousers. Jotaro was a big guy, so it would make sense that it would translate to that, but still. Gulp.

“You seem nervous all of a sudden. Why’s that?” You just rolled your eyes at Jotaro’s smirk, slightly tempted to tease him further just for looking that smug at you. But no, not today. Another time, maybe, but not today. You reached and yanked down his pants and underwear without much fanfare. He let a low growl out of his throat from the action, but you were more focused on the size of Jotaro in general. What was your plan for all of this again? You weren’t sure, but mama didn’t raise no quitter. You just leaned in and wrapped your hand around the base of Jotaro’s shaft, looking up at him coyly.

“I’m not nervous at all. Don’t you worry about a thing.” You told Jotaro before leaning forward, hollowing out your cheeks and wrapping your lips around Jotaro’s cock. He immediately let out a groan and let a hand rest on top of your head, his fingers weaving through your hair but not gripping down, allowing you to adjust and set your own pace. You saw Jotaro’s blissful expression and felt just a bit of pride well up in you, knowing that you were the one who caused him that. You slowly moved your head, only being able to reach about halfway before you hit the back of your throat, your body threatening to choke on him, but you make up for it by using your hand on what your lips couldn’t reach.

You moved at a slow, worshipful pace, taking in the expression on Jotaro’s face as well as slowly working on getting your throat to relax so you could take Jotaro deeper. You could tell he was holding himself back from making any sounds, his teeth digging into his bottom lip so hard you swore that he was going to make himself bleed. You couldn't help but rub your own legs together, unable to sate that aching heat that was pooling in your gut, leaving you to let out a small moan. The vibrations only seemed to spur Jotaro on, unable to stop himself from bucking his hips slightly. You gasped, pulling away from a moment to take a breath, before smirking up at Jotaro.

“You couldn’t help yourself, huh? I bet you would like it if I let you-” You couldn’t get your words out before Jotaro’s grip on your hair tightened, pulling you forward and back down onto his cock. You gagged as he pushed all the way back into your throat, but he just groaned, rubbing your head slightly as if to comfort you. You moaned just a little, willing your throat to loosen just a bit, letting your own fingers dig into your pants as you whimpered at the heat inside of you.

“You talk too much. Just let me… That’s it, that’s better…” Jotaro’s voice was low, akin to something almost guttural as he began to move in your mouth, holding you tight enough to keep you still, but not so tight that you couldn’t move if you truly wanted to. You did your best to stay put, at least. It was actually sort of hot to be manhandled like this, not that you would ever admit that to him. You just moaned and did your best to breathe through your nose as Jotaro had his way with you, relishing in the way his hips would stutter just a little whenever you took the initiative to use your tongue or moan on you. You felt your drool start to drip down your chin as Jotaro’s hips stuttered a bit more, and you could tell that he was close to cumming. But it seemed that right before he actually did, he quickly pulled himself out of your mouth, leaving you to sputter and gasp for a moment. But that moment didn’t last long, Jotaro easily moving forward to push you to the ground, immediately moving to pull off your pants and underwear. You squeaked as your back hit the ground, Jotaro moving in to press his lips against your neck as he pressed up against your entrance.

“Fuck, I bet you would be so tight for me.... Please, let me, I want you so badly…” Jotaro groaned, and if you were any more lost in your own lust, you might actually say yes. But, your own rationality was enough to tell you that Jotaro was far too big, and you were not in the slightest prepared.

“J-Jotaro, please… You know you’re too big, I’m not ready yet… Soon, I just got to be prepared a bit…” You replied, and although Jotaro pouted just a bit, he obliged. You moved to use your own fingers, but Jotaro quickly swatted you away, pushing one of his own inside of you. You immediately let out a soft whimper. God, Jotaro’s hands were way bigger than yours, but still, you weren’t expecting something like this. You felt your toes curl as Jotaro poked and prodded inside of you, adding another finger to help scissor you open.

“G-God, Jotaro… Feels so good, fuck…” You whined, moving to drape your arms over Jotaro’s shoulders and try to pull him closer. It was nice to feel just his skin against yours. He felt so much warmer than you, like his heat was trying to swallow you up, bring you closer to him. Whatever it was, it was working. As Jotaro slowly worked you open, you felt your knees go a bit weak, Jotaro’s lips and occasional teeth on your neck enough to make you moan. Pray to god there isn’t meant to be a class here anytime soon.

You let out a displeased grumble as Jotaro pulled his fingers out of you, your body clamping around him in an attempt to keep him inside of you. Although you were still probably shittily prepared, it was enough for you to throw out all reason as Jotaro moved back to rut against you, a low growl coming from his throat enough to make you quiver.

“Beg for it. Beg for me to fuck you.” His voice was in your ear as he threatened to nip at it, unable to control his mouth from bruising you wherever he got access. Still, you weren’t opposed to the idea of begging. If it meant getting what you wanted, you might do anything.

“F-Fuck, please, Jotaro! Need you, need you so bad! I love you, please, I love you so much, want you to fuck me, please!” You barely registered the words coming out of your mouth, but Jotaro’s eyes widened and left him almost sputtering as he pushed inside of you, groaning as your nails dug into his shoulders. He pushed in slowly, staying still as he could while you adjusted to him. There was certainly a sting from the stretch, but it wasn’t anything that you couldn’t handle. You took a deep breath and tried to regain any semblance of self you had, only for Jotaro to start moving again, and you lost your composure all over again.

Jotaro let his nails dig into your hips hard enough to draw blood, gripping you tightly as he began to thrust into you at a brutal pace, leaving you to moan as you tried to pull Jotaro ever closer.

“Tell me that you love me. Tell me again, please. Tell me, god, tell me over and over…” Jotaro groaned, and god, you were more than happy to oblige. Who even cares if you spilled the beans first in a technical sense? Maybe you said the words first, but Jotaro was more than happy to show his affection. Hey, you weren’t about to complain about it.

“Fuck, love you, Jotaro. Love you so much, loved you since I first saw you, fuuuck, there, feels so good, I love you, please!” You whined out, Jotaro just growling and moving faster. You tried to move, to grind your hips against Jotaro the best you could, but Jotaro just held you in place, refusing to let you move. He was content in fucking you until you could barely move at his own pace, which just so happened to be as fast as humanly possible.

“I love you too, (Y/n). You’re mine, all mine, I love you so much, don’t ever leave me. Please, say you’re mine, I’m yours!” Jotaro growled, pressing his forehead against yours in an attempt to gain just a bit more contact with you.

“All yours, Jotaro, all yours! God, I’m gonna cum, please!” You whined out, feeling your body start to tighten and flutter on Jotaro’s cock, the coil in your belly threatening to snap at any moment you would let it. Jotaro just groaned, your words spurring him on to move faster, his thrusts becoming sloppy as he felt himself coming to a close.

“Fuck, cum with me, please, fuck, gonna cum inside you, fill you up, all mine, god-!” He groaned, snapping his hips forward one last time before you felt a warm heat start to fill you up, enough to push you over the edge and leave you clawing down Jotaro’s back, your eyes rolling into your skull.

The two of you sat like that for a while, bodies pressed against each other as the two of you caught your breath, basking in each other’s presence. After a few minutes, Jotaro finally pulled out and let his lips catch against yours, pulling you into a sloppy kiss. You heartily pressed back into it, letting yourself melt into it as the two of you shared this tender moment.But, as soon as it began, it seemed to end, with Jotaro pulling himself up and starting to redress himself. You pouted, looking up at him.

“I guess you’re not the cuddling type.” You were half teasing, crossing your arms just a little to show you were just the slightest bit upset. Jotaro just rolled his eyes.

“I’m not a fan of cuddling on dirty classroom floors, no. You should have higher standards for yourself.” He replied, leaving you only to laugh.

“You didn’t mind the floor when we were-” You teased, but Jotaro only rolled his eyes and cut you off.

“Shut up. I swear, I don’t know how I’m going to survive you as a partner.” Jotaro replied as he pulled his belt on. The comment made you pause. Partners?

“W-What do you mean by that? Are you saying we’re dating now?” You asked, feeling your cheeks start to heat up just the slightest bit.

“What else? Seriously, you don’t know how to read the room at all.” Jotaro sighed, holding his hand out to you. You paused for a moment before taking it gingerly, only to be yanked up and pulled into Jotaro’s arms. You gasped, feeling yourself pressed up against Jotaro as he held you in his arms.

“Hey. I love you, you know.” You whispered, unable to keep the words from dribbling out of your mouth. It was quick, quiet, as if you didn’t want Jotaro to hear. As if it was some big secret, or that you were afraid that his strong arms would let you go if he heard those words. But he held onto you still, keeping you close to his chest as his hand brushed through your hair. It was almost tender, in a way that made your already jelly knees weaken.

“Don’t worry. I love you too.” Jotaro replied, leaning in to press a kiss against your lips. You let your arms wrap around him, praying that this was no dream.

But this was real, thank god, and you never felt more at home than you did right now.

#jjba imagines #jjba x reader #jjba/reader #jotaro kujo/reader #jotaro x reader #jotaro kujo x reader #jotaro/reader #writing #My writing #mine #not sfw

232 notes · View notes