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#I THINK THIS SHOULD BE CANON CAUSE ITS FUNNY
ninjasmudge · 1 year
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what if azure lion's tail is just outright invisible. for some reason. cursed. babygirl got that invisible tail curse
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local monkeys confused by lion with weird invisible tail curse
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skitskatdacat63 · 9 months
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I apologize for how incredibly specific and niche this is, but aahhhh whenever people call rbr Seb a "boy king", I can literally only think about this statuette:
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1. Because I think it gives the same angelic but mischievous vibe as Seb
2. Because it is a statue of a literal boy king
3. The ringlets and big eyes.....
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movedtodykedvonte · 1 year
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Number One Rated [[House Husband]] 1997 au lore is that the kids get into the mansion basically as Spamton’s guests and the entire time they are just insulting him and asking him if he’s more like the Queen’s weird little court jestor or boyfriend. Occasionally the Swatchlings butt in to confirm he is both and neither 
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vyglitchcraft · 8 months
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Since requests are open, can you write for havik, shao, Scorpion and sub zero with a size kink SFW and NSFW headcanons? ʕʘ‿ʘʔ
YES BITCH I WILL, you have good taste in men hot DAMN also yes putting their canon heights just so you can imagine it (atleast before MK1 assuming they didn't change the height)
Sizing Up (18+)
MK1 Shao, Havik, Bi-Han, Kuai Liang x gen!reader size kink headcanons
Warning: Havik's section has mentions of gore and more extreme fetishes
General Shao (7'2 ft)
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SFW
This hunk of muscles love to show off his build, he is VERY proud of it. Like the type of douchebag in the gym that would flex in front of the mirror type of guy. And you love every second of it
He likes to show off, that's just a thing that Shao likes in every timeline. He likes to pick you up and just point out how small and light you are, how you're lucky to have him because someone can just pick you up and run off with you
He's a bit of a jerk but you should expect that when you dated him. He constantly teases you about your height and he'll make sure you will NOT forget that you're short. Jars on the highest shelf, every lid is screwed on a bit TOO tight, you can't seem to find any stools to stand on so that means only one thing, you're forced to ask him for help and he would HAPPILY do it with a shit eating grin on his face
He LOVES it when you do a size comparison between you and him, especially with your hands, he thinks its so precious that he can just hold both of your hands with only one of his
He went FERAL when he saw you in his clothes
NSFW
When i say this man is huge EVERYWHERE i mean it, you wouldn't be exaggerating when you compare it to your arm.
"Are you sure? I could break you" is something he constantly says. He loves to lay his cock right on top of your stomach, just admiring just how deep he could reach. Heck it scares you sometimes too, i mean who wouldn't?
But all those feelings are gone when you feel that delicious stretch as he slowly pushes his cock into you. He loves to compare you to a sex toy just because he could just hold your torso with one hand and just use you. He is VERY degrading in bed but god does he love you too.
"So pathetic, did it reach your brain too? Look at me while i use you" even when the two of you are doing it sitting down, you only reach his chest.
He loves to see the outline of his cock on your stomach, he's amazed that someone as small as you can take something that big.
You're practically getting tossed around from position to position, you're gonna get manhandled like a sack of potatoes
Havik (6'4 ft)
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SFW
Also messes with you but more just because it causes chaos. Although he doesn't care about his height unlike Shao, he is absolutely fixated by the fact that you're so small compared to him. He thinks you're adorable and wants to bite your head off.
Chews on your hair. You're probably the perfect height for him to lay his head on top of yours. Your hair gets into his mouth sometimes and he likes chewing on it.
He likes to hold onto you, he wants you to carry him around because he thinks it's funny that someone THAT small can carry a man his height. So yes you're here giving this man a piggy back ride while he chews on your hair. Look don't expect maturity from HIM of all people.
Also likes to carry you everywhere and put everything (including you) on a really high shelf, why? Because chaos.
"I can throw you" "Havik WHY" "what if i throw you across the arena so you can attack people from behind" "WHY WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT"
He's big but he acts like he's small, he either is NOT aware of his height or just does it to mess with you, could be both.
NSFW
Cute aggression but kinky. That's all i can say about him.
But anyway he likes to point out certain details that just make you want to cover your face. He appreciates that you're so easily pinned down. Your feet aren't touching the ground if you're getting fucked on a table or some other random surface.
Please be warned, the man has no filter. His dirty talk is explicit and isn't for the faint of heart.
Goes fucking FERAL when he sees your stomach bulging from his cock. How you can barely handle anything yet you do, easily too. He loves it. "I wonder if i pull out fast enough, i could pull your intestines inside out"
"I can feel myself hitting your lungs, do you like it?" he's exaggerating but he loves how you're basically choking from the pleasure. Although if you're genuinely uncomfortable or hurt, he will stop. As chaotic as he is, he doesn't want to see you hurt or at worst die.
Loves it when you're the dominant one though. He's a switch. He likes it when someone weak like you can overpower him (if you can't, he likes to pretend) you can do anything to him, he can regenerate any part of his body.
Bi-Han (6'2 ft)
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SFW
Overbearing as fuck. He treats you like you're just this small vulnerable rabbit. He feels the need to always protect you, i mean someone your size surely can't protect themselves right? That's why you have him! If you think he's overprotective, he's even more so when you're small
You're a porcelain doll to him, one wrong move and you'll be hurt. Although he's very gentle, he's also like a predator, almost a yandere. You're spoiled, he's the grandmaster, who's gonna stop him from using the Lin Kuei's money for you. But you ain't gonna do shit without him "protecting" you
Since every ninja is around 6'2 (except Tremor and Reptile i think) so you bet your ass you can't reach shit but don't worry, Bi-Han is there to help you. You won't be lifting a finger when he's around.
Oh but don't think he's all soft, his anger is fucked. He uses his size to intimidate people, standing behind you like a shadow. Or having you on his lap like a pet.
Your size means you're also easily movable. He uses this to his advantage to just carry you around or pick you up if he needs you.
NSFW
Again, predator/prey. He absolutely takes advantage of the fact that you're so weak compared to him. The way he can make you whine with one of his fingers, gives him an ego boost. "I can't wait to stretch you to the limits"
Everything about him screams possessive and the fact that you look so small and weak compared to him makes it even worse. The fact that he can just wrap his hand around your whole neck. The fact that you cry every time he fucks you, he lives for it.
He'll pin you down, bite you, everything that you'll love today but regret tomorrow. His grip is bruising but no worries, he'll make sure to take care of you after it. His hands would be cold enough to soothe the pain
Seeing you grip onto him, how he overpowers you and you're hugging him as if he's the only person that could keep you safe. God he could go another round just from seeing it.
Kuai Liang (6'2 ft)
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SFW
Not as obsessive as his brother, he's respectful. He loves you and he'll make sure you know it. He wants you to feel protected but not scared. Although he discourages you from fighting because he's scared that you'll get overpowered.
He's pretty self aware about his height but he won't make it your problem.
He LOVES it when you wear his clothes or any oversized shirt. He just wants to choke you with his chain and hug you until you can't breathe.
He likes to hold your face with both of his hands and just squish your cheeks. His hands pretty much cover your face. Oh and he doesn't mind carrying you everywhere he goes, it's embarrassing but if you want him to do it, he'll handle the teasing, as long as you're happy.
Does that thing where he just puts his hands on your face, grabbing your head like a basketball. He isn't really thinking about anything, he just does it sometimes. Also accidentally gained the reflex of having to crouch just to go face to face with you. Yes its a bit degrading but he'll snap out of it and go back to his normal position.
NSFW
The fact that you're so light and small compared to him makes it so easy for him to just pin you against a wall. He loves the sense of power that he has over you. You're so vulnerable and he could just defeat you.
To his dismay, he's pretty similar to his brother but much more merciful and less degrading. "So small, so weak, i could just break you"
He would tie you up with his chains and just let you warm up his cock, his big arms wrapping around your neck while he studies in his room. His hand would wander down, cupping your stomach or thighs. Feeling your head lean back on his chest while you beg for him to move.
In his mind, you're like a pocket pussy, a cute toy but he would never mention it. He has a filter but his mind does not. He would love to see you beg that he's too big, that it hurts, your hole not closing up after he's done with you, he wants to see it but he would never say it to you, its too embarrassing.
Your small frame when you go all limp after a session looks so adorable that he just wants to hold your hips down and use you until you're all loose and open. "I'll mold you into my shape, i need you to be mine" he pants out, biting your shoulder, he really is similar to his brother even if he denies it.
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cryptidghostgirl · 3 months
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Are your requests still open? I was hoping for a request for a Lucifer x sinner reader where she was once in love with someone when she was alive but they betrayed her leading to her death causing her to be afraid of letting others in. She's been a resident of the hotel since the pilot, but doesn't really talk much about her feelings or past life but is convinced by Charlie who says singing helps her when she needs to get out her own emotions. So when she thinks everyone is gone for the day on one of Charlie's bonding field trips, she uses the piano in the main area to sing her heart out, not realizing Lucifer decided to stay. The song I'm thinking of is "Perfect Doesn't Last" by Beth Crowley. So when she sings it and he overhears listening and watching her he's reminded of Lilith and feels for the reader understanding her more than when they first met during his first visit to the hotel (ep 5). I'm not sure of how to end it, so if you want to add anything to it I'm totally up for it. I just thought this song would match him so well.
A/N this is my first time writing for this man. Also,, i think it’s so funny that everyone is just like “short king” even tho alastor is canonically at least seven feet tall and charlie is at least like six feet tall. that’s so silly of us.
Encore (Lucifer x Reader)
Paring: Lucifer x Reader
Warnings: Domestic abuse briefly mentioned.
Word Count: 2,169
Master Lists:
Master Lists 
Hazbin Hotel Master List
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Lucifer had just wanted to visit Charlie. With their relationship on the up and up, he was eager to not give up his chance to fix things with his favorite and only daughter. However, when he arrived at the hotel, throwing the doors open in unadulterated excitement, it was to find the normally busy lobby area empty.
The door fell shut behind him and his smile slipped from his face. Carefully, he ran his eyes over every inch of the room. There really was no one to be found.
"Maybe they're just all in their rooms, yeah." he said aloud to himself, "Charlie is probably... in her office! It must take a lot of work to run a place like this. Yeah, that's what it is."
Charlie, Vaggie, and Alastor had asked her to come with them to the movies. It was supposed to be a reward, for how hard they had all been working. They had really tried their best to convince Y/n to join them but, as always was the case when activities that took them out of the hotel were not required, Y/n had declined the offer.
Y/n was still getting used to Hell in all its big scary wonder, she still hurt. Everything was so complicated and while spending time with her thoughts didn't make her feel good per-say, spending time with others had been making her feel even worse. Besides, Charlie had given her some advice a few days ago she wanted to test out and she didn't exactly feel comfortable doing that while the hotel was crawling with people.
Y/n trusted Charlie. She was the first person to have extended a kind hand in her direction since her arrival in Hell. When Charlie had found out Y/n had been a concert pianist in the living world, she was elated.
"That's perfect!" she had said, leaning across the desk towards her, "We have a piano in the Hotel's auditorium!"
"I... I don't know if I really can... perform, right now. If that's alright." Y/n had replied, wringing her hands and unable to keep eyecontact.
"What? Oh no! That's not what I meant at all. It just seems... well if you did it for a living, you must have loved it. And it seems like you always have a lot on your mind, lots of stuff to process, and I know you don't like talking to people about it and, well, music always makes me feel better. It feels freeing, like I'm getting everything bottled up inside me out when I sing."
"I... I don't think I've ever really thought about it that way." she had admitted in response, "It was just something I had always done. I started lessons when I was three."
"Well, you should try it some time." Charlie had smiled back, "Maybe it will help."
Once she was sure everyone was gone and the hotel was hers alone, Y/n had slipped quietly from the confinement of her room. It had taken her a bit to find the auditorium. When she finally did and saw the piano it held, her breath caught in her throat.
It was a beautiful old baby grand made out of a warm cherry wood that matched the hotel's theming well. The lid had creaked when she had opened it, the keys had been dusty to the touch.
It had been a long time since she'd played. With mild joy, she let her fingers run the usual scales and arpeggios, finding a comfort in the familiarity of it all. Once satisfied her fingers were all warmed up and ready to play something real, she posed them over the keys.
Lucifer had lost himself in the depths of the labyrinthine hotel. The twists and turns of the hallways were unfamiliar to him despite the tour Charlie, Vaggie, and Alastor had lead him on. His hope at finding his daughter and spending some time with her had long since flickered out. He was on the verge of going home, his hand half raised to open a portal, when he heard it.
A faint echo of music flooded the hallway and Lucifer froze. It was haunting and distant, it drew him in. His sights set on a new sort of entertainment for the afternoon, he listened carefully and began to follow the sound.
As he got closer to its source, Lucifer realized that who ever was making the music was not just playing the piano but singing. Their voice was soft and lovely, nearly ethereal in its sheer humanity and anguish.
I would have bet on us
We were untouchable, you and I
I couldn't get enough
It was a fairytale come to life
Lucifer at last reached the half open door to the room the music appeared to be coming from. Not wanting to disturb the artist just yet, he transformed into a snake and slithered his way silently into the room. There, sitting at the piano on the stage, was Y/n.
I had your heart
At least that's what I thought
Now I'm second guessing every moment
Wondering where we went so wrong
He didn't really know much about Y/n except that she was new to Hell. Charlie had mentioned off hand that she had died in an incident of domestic abuse. Lucifer had no idea why she had ended up in Hell or what she was really like. When he had visited the hotel the first time, Y/n had been quiet and reserved. She had stood to the side and watched, barley even introducing herself to him.
At first, he had thought it to be disrespect. Not every demon in Hell was his biggest fan after all and while he was used to it, it still stung that even one of his daughters would be reformed sinners would be blatantly rude to him. He had quickly realized however from her flittering eyes and the way she clutched at herself that it wasn't disrespect at all. Y/n had been nervous.
Of course, Lucifer had made an attempt to make her feel more comfortable but, when he had extended his metaphorical hand, Y/n had just closed herself off even further. According to Charlie and Angel Dust, that was just what the demoness was like. She was shy.
You got inside my head
Taking up every inch of space
'Til there was no room left
Her hands flew across the keys with a practiced grace. Lucifer felt she knew he was there, watching. He felt that she just might be performing for him.
So many parts of me erased
You had my heart
And tossed it in the dirt
As he listened to the words she sung, they resonated with him. For a split second, he could have sworn it was Lilith sitting there at the piano, not Y/n. He shut his eyes, shaking his head slightly. He was oddly grateful when he opened them again to find it had just been his imagination.
Now that was a first. Since Lilith had disappeared seven years ago, Lucifer had been a mess. Lucifer was always a mess but, Lilith leaving like that really did him in. She had been his rock, his guiding light, his everything. He had risked everything for her and he had lost. At least, back in the old days, he had gained something out of the chaos. A daughter, a wife, a world to try and shape. One after another, they were all taken from him. Even now, even with their relationship improving the way it was, he felt Charlie slipping away again.
Now I'm second guessing every moment
Wondering where we went so wrong
I just keep asking
Would this have been worth it if I knew the ending all along.
Without really thinking about it, Lucifer retook his normal form and sat down in one of the auditorium's front row seats. Thankfully, Y/n was too wrapped up in her own world to notice and she just continued to play.
What started so perfect was over too fast
I should have seen the warning signs
'Cause perfect doesn't last
Perfect doesn't last
Light shined off her face, that was how Lucifer had realized she was crying. Despite the tears, her voice never wavered. A performer at her core, just like him.
I would have bet on us
We were untouchable, you and I
As the last lingering notes echoed through the room, he began to clap. Y/n jumped at the noise, turning to face him with wide eyes and cheeks flushed red with embarrassment. Lucifer was undeterred and, getting to his feet, gave her a standing ovation. After a few moments, he ceased in his applause.
"That was beautiful." he said, breaking the new silence that had fallen between them.
"Um, I'm sorry." Y/n's gaze fell back to the piano.
"No! No no no!" Lucifer exclaimed, jumping up onto the stage.
He kneeled before her, lifting her hands from her lap and taking them in his own. She turned to him, surprise drawing out the features of her face once again.
"Don't apologize for taking up space."
"I... I just didn't mean to disturb you is all. If you're looking for Charlie, she's out at the movies with everyone else."
"I was but, I can talk to her later, when she gets back. You didn't disturb me at all, Y/n. As I said, it was beautiful. It was..."
He trailed off, the smile slipping from his face.
"Oh fuck!" Y/n exclaimed, "I didn't mean to upset you! I'm really sorry, what can I do to make it better?"
"You didn't upset me." Lucifer shook his head, "You just... somehow managed to put words to the very things I've been struggling with the past couple years."
A smaller, much kinder and more genuine smile made its way onto his face.
"If you'd like to play more, I'd love to hear it."
Y/n's cheeks flushed red again.
"Theres no pressure." Lucifer shrugged, "Just giving you the option."
"An audience of one... well, it's a little intimidating." she admitted bashfully, "I'm used to the faceless mob of the crowd."
"I can see why. You have an undeniable gift."
"I guess... I don't know. Charlie just said it might help me process stuff. To play again, I mean."
"Was she right?"
Y/n paused in thought for a moment before nodding slowly.
"I think she might have been. My chest does feel a little lighter now."
"Then play."
"Um, mister... king of Hell? Sir?"
Lucifer laughed.
"You can just call me by my name. No formalities necessary. 'Mister king of Hell sir' was my fathers name."
Y/n laughed lightly at his terrible joke. The sound sparked a sudden joy in Lucifer's chest, one he hadn't felt in quite a long time.
"Well, Lucifer." she began again, stumbling a bit over his name.
"Yes?"
"I'll... um, I'll need my hands back. If I'm to keep playing."
"Wh..."
He looked down and his eyes widened. Lucifer hadn't realized he had still held her hands in his. Immediately he dropped them, getting to his feet and looking away in mild embarrassment.
"Sorry, about that."
"Don't apologize for existing." Y/n parroted his earlier words.
When he turned back to her, it was to find she was smiling slightly.
"How bad would it be if I said sorry again right now?"
"You'd be sounding like me."
"Lets make a deal then: no sorries unless something is actually wrong."
"What if I can't tell if your mad at me or not?"
Lucifer looked down at the seated demon. In not one of his wildest dreams could he ever imagine being mad at her but, that wasn't exactly something he could say.
"Then you can always ask."
"And you promise you wont lie to me?"
"I promise."
"Promise promise?"
"Yes!"
She eyed him suspiciously for a moment before nodding her head. Turning back to the piano, her hands found their place on the keys once again. She hesitated.
"I..." Y/n shot Lucifer a look over her shoulder, "Thank you."
"Thank you. There is some solace in knowing someone else out there feels the same way I do, if for different reasons."
"Yeah. There is, isn't there? Maybe part of our deal can be helping each other figure that all out too."
The suggestion had been half thought out. Y/n hadn't really meant to give it a voice, it had escaped her locked lips. She quickly turned back to the piano.
"Sorry. That was dumb."
"What did we just say about sorries!" Lucifer exclaimed, "No apologizing for existing. I think that suggestion sounds rather nice."
"Really?"
"Really."
"Okay. I... I'm actually going to play now. Is that okay?"
With a snap of his fingers, Lucifer reappeared in the seat he had previously inhabited. He crossed his legs, resting his hands on his knee.
"Whenever your ready."
----
Song is Perfect Doesn't Last by Beth Crowley as requested :)
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local-littleguy · 3 months
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hmmm
so theres that cursed cat alastor right? (it may have stopped trending but idfc)
concept: alastor's true form is that cat thing. after the finale his powers get weakened or something. and he gets like. Issues and keeps periodically getting stuck as a cat
but bc its alastor he just uses it to cause as many problems as possible. because why wouldnt he.
he keeps going "ohhh Yes that is my Cat Yes" and like. husk is the only one who figures it out. maybe bc hes a cat too and he like. can tell its alastor idk
and then he keeps glaring at the cat and alastor just thinks this is so funny. "no one will Ever believe you good sir :)" and husk hates that hes right.
also vox is so pissed because alastor has a cat which goes viral. and hes sitting there like "bitch the radio dickhead is going viral without meaning to??? what the fuck???" he cant escape him :(
vaggie keeps looking at the cat out of the corner of her eye. she does not trust it. charlies like "Nooo alastor has potential, see?? he has a cat! he has a pet! he can feel love :DD!" and vaggies like "babe it tried to fucking eat my arm i dont think that thing is any more capable of love than he is"
idk i think this would be really funny. lucifer actually thinks the cat is kind of cute but he refuses to admit it but then alastor walks in as a cat and lucifers like "Oh hi little guy :)" in a sort of grudgingly affectionate voice and alastor is like . "wha. what. whhhhh. whhat is going on??"
idk he causes problems i think. and i think this should be canon. please consider this
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rottiens · 2 months
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SHADE OF BLUE | GŌJŌ SATORU
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✮ WC. . 2.6k
✮ tags. . canon au, yan gōjō, fem reader, blood, fluff (?), the descriptions could imply that the reader is depressed (tho I don't think so), suggestive. 18+ mdni. divider creds: cafekitsune.
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Your vision is tinged with red, just like the sunset that paints the clouds above your head. However, this color is not as intense as the fresh blood that stains Satoru's hands, part of his arms and blue shirt. It seems that the violently inflicted wound caused some drops to reach his cheek, leaving a silhouette that would mimic the stroke of a wet brush. In the distance, as if planned, a bird squawked, causing your muscles to twitch as the cold breeze bites at your bare legs.
At first you fear for the blood being his but that doesn't make sense, you quickly cross out that idea.
"Wh-"
"May I come in?" his voice interrupts you, tired, raspy.
His white hair is wet like he's been running to get here or like he's been standing in the drizzle that started falling a few minutes ago.
"What happened?" Initially, the voice you hear is unfamiliar, echoing distorted in your eardrums.
"Please?" your fingers expose your unsure thoughts as you squeeze and cling to the doorknob. Satoru takes a fleeting glance at your chest made transparent by the pink fabric of the bathrobe hugging your figure, only to snap back into your eyes. "You're not afraid, are you?"
You take a deep breath of air; the rusty iron smell of blood stirs your insides. Finally, you exhale your doubts and push the door a little further to give him room and allow him to enter the cozy cabin, still with the thought hammering at the back of your neck that this is a mistake.
Satoru tilts his head down as he passes through the doorway, his long strides taking him straight into the heart of the cabin without pausing to look back. The cabin, which you rented to be close to the mountains and escape the horror your life had become a few weeks ago, has a rustic and cozy atmosphere, splashed with brown colors wherever you look.
The wooden floor creaks softly under Satoru's feet as they pause in front of the lit fireplace, while the dim light from the lamp overhead dances across his broad back and the walls.
Satoru turns to look at you. The tension from earlier when you opened the door seems to have disappeared from his face, his cheeks pale from the cold and his rose-tinted lips grateful that you have given him shelter.
"It's a cozy place." Satoru is playing with the silver ring on his finger as he holds your gaze. Your lungs empty, you should have known it wouldn't be so easy for him to explain what happened. With Satoru nothing is easy.
Your folded arms press closer to your chest, hiding your hard nipples from his all-seeing eyes.
"Thanks," is all you say in regards to his compliment because after all, why pretend this is a normal visit.
"That's funny. We could have both been here together."
A smile laden with irony stretches your lips. Your arms fall to either side of your body showing him your vulnerability. "It's funny indeed, considering it was you who broke up with me."
His laughter echoed with a sarcastic tone full of disdain, as if he was mocking the situation. "You know what…"
"Whose blood is it, Satoru?" You get right to the point and he grins now, combing back strands of hair that immediately take on the red color trapped in his fingers.
"I need a shower first." His long strides catch up to you as he slips past you, his eyes scanning you up and down undisguised before he turns his gaze back to the front. You call out his name turning on your heels only to catch up to see him disappear up the small steps that would take him toward the second floor and the bathroom. "Don't worry! I know where the bathroom is…after all, I was the one who sent you the pictures of the cabin, remember?"
You want to just sit there near the fireplace, feel its warmth on your hands, face. Sink your fingers into your forehead, massage your temples and finally wake up and realize that this is nothing but a dream… no! A nightmare. What was Satoru doing here? It was just one of dozens of questions bombarding your head, your temples beginning to throb with pain.
You command your feet to walk over the Persian carpet, its soft cells massaging your feet guiding you towards the steps previously trodden by your ex-lover. As you enter the hallway the rope that suddenly began to bind your temples like a rubber band tightens with more intensity, the floor is covered by the trail of his dirty clothes: shirt, pants, socks, boxers….
In front of the bathroom and thanks to the half-open door, you hear the water running. Your fingers push unwillingly the door relieving in front of you a completely naked man smelling the shampoo you had left on top of the sink, even without looking at you, Satoru could recognize your scent at least ten kilometers away so seeing him smiling when you stand still in the door frame is not a surprise for you.
"Satoru."
"I was missing hearing my name in your voice." His long eyelashes close as he utters these words, fluttering as he squeezes the bottle of shampoo to release the scent of coconut and vanilla. "Damn." Smells like you. His grip on the plastic bottle grows tighter before he finally sets it aside. He contemplates himself in the mirror for a moment before speaking again. "Come closer," he tells you, disguising his command as a request.
You don't know if it's because you don't feel like fighting that draws you toward him like a sailor to a siren's song, or if you really miss him and would be willing to do anything he asked of you to have his attention on you again. The only thing you recognize at this moment is his presence, which makes you feel overwhelmed and nervous, just like before when you were together.
Satoru turns to acknowledge your presence. "I asked you a question earlier." He stretches out his hand, and though your body tightens from the inside, you don't move a muscle. "Are you afraid of me, angel?" His fingers, which were hovering over your collarbone without yet touching you, descend along your sternum, brushing a nipple that hardens further by his presence as you try to pretend nothing affects you.
"No."
"Good." Satoru licks his lips. "Because I would never hurt you." As he continues to amuse himself with his fingers making circles you can't feel on your chest, your attention focuses on the details of his face; his pale skin and the red spot on his cheek that breaks the harmony of the color palette. "Now. Ask me."
You weren't prepared to hear what she had to say. Whatever his answer or justification, you could feel the weight of guilt of being complicit. Still, you dare to ask directly, "Whose blood is it?"
"I had to clean up," he replies with an exhausted sigh, then pulling his hand away from you and causing you to whimper almost like a wounded puppy. "The higher-ups," he finally adds, punching you in the lower stomach.
Immediately, something acidic pours into you, burning your insides, your esophagus, filling your mouth with saliva.
"Satoru?" you mumble barely audible, horror marking your frown and a brief pout warped by dismay. You needed him to tell you it was a joke. He took the hem of the blindfold and pulled it over his head like a bandana, only to let it rest beside you over the sink.
"Hm?" He's not looking at you, and you desperately look for him to continue the conversation.
"Did you kill them?" It's the question you don't want him to answer, even though deep down you already know the answer; you just need confirmation.
"Come with me."
Instead of answering your question, Satoru entwines his still-cold fingers with yours and guides you toward the shower that continues to spill water onto the tiles. You, on the other hand, don't move a muscle; your feet cling to the floor like roots as adrenaline floods through your bloodstream.
"Did you?" you insist.
"Just a few," he replies with the same relaxed expression.
"Just a few?! You can't…"
"Oh, but I did. I can, as a matter of fact. And I'll do it again if they dare speak to my future wife like that again."
In a matter of seconds, a lot happens. His fingers squeeze yours, proving to you that this was real; unlike the dreams and nightmares you've had about him over the past few days. His blue eyes finally stay locked on yours, burning your heated self with their icy presence as he tries to decipher what exactly is going on in your mind. You stumble over your own breath as you struggle to inhale deeply, rushing oxygen to your brain.
Something warm spills down your cheeks, descends into the depths of your belly and finally settles in your pelvis, riotous and intense, as subtle as the wings of a butterfly.
"I don't understand," is all you manage to say, your brain trying to process hundreds of stimuli at once. "Did you do it for me?" Guilt. Guilt.
You should feel guilty, your inner morale accuses you.
Once again, Satoru ignores you and pulls your hand to walk you towards the shower. This time you don't insist on standing still; your legs obediently respond by automatically moving toward the glass cubicle, giving his fingers permission to remove your clothing. Your tense body is grateful for the warmth of the water that immediately drenches you, for before he came to break what little stability you had managed to create, you were about to step into the shower.
For his part, he grabs the sponge and offers it to you, and it takes you a few seconds to accept it amidst the disheveled blinking that chases away the tears that threaten to spill. Then he drops a stream of the liquid soap and turns his back to you.
Moles and freckles hug it, from his broad, strong shoulders to the small of his back. Memories lash you; you remember tracing those moles when neither of you could sleep, you remember kissing them, you remember your fingernails creating red moons on it.
You carefully round his waist, your forehead rests right in the middle of his shoulder blades and the rain from the shower now falls directly on your head, making it a little difficult to breathe, but you stay there, tucked in your safe place. You remain silent like that for a while, feeling the warmth of the water wash away the dirt into the plumbing as everything he has said sorts itself out in your head like a jigsaw puzzle.
Last month, your life and everything you knew as stable came crashing down after a mission gone wrong. The bloodied faces of the civilians who died because of you haunt you every so often at night. This resulted in your demotion in rank as a sorceress and a six-month suspension. No missions. You couldn't set foot in the academy, which equaled no financial stability, not being able to help your parents pay for the house, much less pay for your own apartment.
You thought things couldn't get any worse until, a few days later, your boyfriend of two years broke up with you, leaving you adrift in a sea of unpleasant emotions that you couldn't control. So having Satoru here in front of you after days of not going out to see sunlight and having no contact with other human beings, feeling his presence under your body is overwhelming, almost unreal. You allow yourself to sob quietly, being cradled and coddled in his arms as he turns you to press your body much closer to his.
He cooing to you, murmuring sweet words that only he can say and that you long to hear.
"I'm sorry I left you when you needed me most. I had to pretend that the disappearance of a couple of higher-ups wasn't related to you. I would never put you in danger," he says once you've finished your shower and the jet of water has stopped.
Satoru holds your cheeks, looking at you as if you were the most precious thing to him. Inevitably, more tears spill down your cheeks and he hurries to wipe them away with his thumbs.
"Sh. I'm here now," he murmurs, keeping his gaze fixed on you, on your lips. "Can I kiss you?"
Your throat is still in a lump, but you nod slowly giving him the permission he needs and Satoru doesn't wait to place his mouth on yours taking you into a trance where you feel only his soft lips molding yours, purring as he pushes his mouth against yours. You feel him exploring every space, roaming every nook and cranny as the kiss intensifies accompanied by a soft chant of moans that grow louder each time.
Your ribs are pressed into his palms, his fingers defining the contours as he slowly pushes you against the wet wall.
"I missed you," he admits between kisses, finally pulling away to rest on the line of your neck and leaving a mark with his teeth.
. . .
Silently, Satoru guides you into the room, holding your hand the whole time. He helps himself by the dim light of the night lamp to move naked around the room. Seeing him act the way he used to, when everything was fine, fills your chest with nostalgia.
After a moment, he gets an extra towel from your suitcase along with essential oils that you always carry with you and with a kiss on the forehead followed by a brief giggle, he asks you to sit on the floor next to the bed to help you dry your hair. It's the first time in a long time that you don't have to worry about feeling guilty or sad, because all you can feel is him, his fingers, the way he interrupts his massages on your skull to kiss your face.
Satoru holds you against his chest all night. Your naked bodies melt as one under the silk sheets, he presses you against him as if he fears you will run away. His legs entwined like vines keep you safe.
In the middle of the night satoru turns his back on you releasing you from his prison and letting you be the one to protect him now, you circle his waist and hide your face in his silky clean hair, the strands tickle your face but you refuse to move away from the safety this moment brings you, the smell of your shampoo on him has never smelled so good.
"Satoru." You call out to him in a whisper so low you wonder if you've woken him. You don't want to interrupt his sleep and are surprised when he mumbles a Hm? Are you okay? "I didn't mean to wake you," you reply.
"I wasn't sleeping." This time he turns his body to look at you, holding his face with one hand while the other is on your waist, keeping you still. From the tired look and the slight dark circles under his eyes that begin to form, you wonder when was the last time he had a good night's sleep. "What's wrong?"
What you're about to say to him makes you embarrassed for some reason.
"You mentioned you wouldn't let anyone talk to your wife like that…" you blurt out the sentence, letting it float into the room unfinished. Hearing your words immediately makes him smile and you feel his fingers tighten on your skin.
"Yeah. I said that," he states proudly.
"You were serious?"
"There's nothing that would make me happier. So yes, you will one day be my wife when you're ready."
You are driven by emotion to throw yourself on top of him, pressing your body to his and melting into an embrace that neither of you wants to break first.
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notes. yeah, he kills people but he's my little meow meow and have you considered that he's a good husband too? yeah that's what I thought.
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mysterycitrus · 2 months
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I keep hearing people say to ignore Devin Grayson’s Nightwing but I also see people reference it. I feel like I’m getting mixed signals. Should I avoid it or read it? Are there specific issue I should avoid or read? is the avoiding advice only for people who are new to the comics? Or should I really just avoid the whole thing?
short answer — u do not have to read devin graysons nightwing run. i wouldn’t recommend it to new readers, and there isn’t anything significantly important that happens so like. it’s an easy pass. i do encourage people to at least read what she wrote about, though, because devin accidentally kickstarted the next twenty or so years of bad writing in nightwing books.
the long answer — devin grayson was a writer for nightwing volume 2 from like….. issue #70ish to #115ish. she did a lot of weird things during her run — her takes on dick’s relationships with bruce and slade and helena come to mind — but the most popular talking points wrt her writing are issue 93 and maaaaybe the renegade arc but that is literally the tip of shit mountain.
it’s funny u say that people are telling u not to read it cause based on my experience in fandom it is very, very clear that very few people have read any of the run at all, or even #93 and it’s preceding issues. which is fine, because it’s bad. but it’s important to understand why it’s bad, and how it’s affected dicks characterisation in both canon and fanon.
nightwing #93 is the issue people say to avoid because it features dick’s assault at the hands of a former ally that devin refused to acknowledge was rape until like… 2014. it’s bad. the build up to this point — haleys is set on fire, dicks apartment is destroyed killing everyone inside, dick watches this ally kill a man on his behalf while he is helpless to stop her — is rarely discussed in the context of the scene. it’s a lot, but because people haven’t read it they misunderstand the dynamics that devin had created.
the worst parts about nightwing in the present — his lack of conviction and competence, his sexualisation and dehumanisation, the fundamental lack of empathy for his retconned bg as a poc — all started with devin. literal ground zero. i cannot emphasise how her i incapability to understand that she’d written an assault arc with her self insert as the instigator has played into dick’s status as a character in the 2020s. many people accidentally engage with the same tired, racist tropes that devin herself contributed to, because people simply do not know (or care to know) what she’d written. think about much fanon content revolves around dick being an accessory to his own assault, or being literally unable to advocate for himself, or relying on jason fucking todd to kill his rapist. it’s like im rereading nightwing vol 2 all over again, and that’s not a good thing.
however what people also tend to forget about is the racism. devin grayson introduced dick having rromani heritage into canon, sure, but she did it because she thought it was sexy. we see this with her writing for roy’s navajo heritage too — a lack of research and care, though dick’s was clearly egregiously fetishistic. she retconned the character that assaulted dick into a latina character, and retconned her into being an aggressively sexual and violent person that was at significant odds with her og characterisation. that seems to be a trend with nightwing writers — wolfman did the exact same thing like fifteen years earlier with about the same degree of nuance and empathy.
ig my answer is that nightwing vol 2 is very much a pick and choose run, make ur own adventure type experience. bizarrely, u can get better nightwing characterisation in the titans 1999 run, or batman plus arsenal, which were both also written by devin (heartbreaking, the worst person u kno just made a good point). id be wary of people telling u to avoid it entirely, because i think ignoring its existence just exacerbates the problems devin created. just be discerning, ig. but also read nightwing vol 2 #118-#124 (just after devin leaves) because it is gd hilarious
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gayelderstourney · 10 months
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OLD MAN YAOI BRACKET ROUND 1
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Propaganda:
Jean Valjean/Javert:
One of the OG enemies to lovers. In the novel and musical, Valjean and Javert have complex, intertwined, and mirrored narratives which make them a fascinating ship to analyze. Also, there is a lot of hot fanfiction about them.
javert chases valjean around for at least 20 years because he broke parole and that's a big plot point. (jvj went to jail for bread theft if it matters.) considering how long that is and how much javert feels the need to do said chasing around that's kinda gay. also at one point javert is employed by valjean (except he doesn't know it's him and knows him as m. madeleine) and then asks madeleine to fire him. because he thought he was valjean and wanted to send him to jail even though he IS valjean. but some other guy got framed instead so it checks out and then WAY later on the barricades javert gets captured by a bunch of college students and valjean sets him free. this causes javert to have an existential crisis because 'OH NO HE'S A CRIMINAL BUT HE'S NICE TO ME' and then he kills himself. (also they have a very awkward carriage ride together. along with the unconscious body of valjean's future son-in-law. after valjean was in the parisian sewers and therefore covered in sewer water.)
what if i was an escaped convict and also the extremely benevolent mayor of a small jet producing town who broke into people's houses to give them money. and you were a furry cop trying to arrest me anyway. and then i save you from execution in the June rebellion and you realise that the police are not a symbol of justice but authority and being a criminal in the eyes of the law is completely separate from being a bad person. and this fucked you up so bad you killed yourself.
fuck those twinks in les mis these are the real finest gay love story victor hugo ever invented. javert literally followed valjean across france for decades because of his psychosexual obsession with recapturing him. valjean had the chance to kill him and spared his life, thus jump-starting javert's entire emotional arc. they're deranged and obsessive and they should kiss on the mouth
javert threw himself off a bridge bcs he was so mad the guy he was obsessively chasing was actually a good person depsite being a criminal theres gay ass old man yuri here
When you build your entire life around the existence of a man you despise is that still gay or do we need to invent something that transcends homosexuality. Asking for a friend.
fellas is it gay to spend your entire life chasing another man to arrest him even though all he did was steal a loaf of bread
Ravenpaw/Barley:
kitties who were outcast from previous groups they were a part of and find and live with each other. they are canonical mates even though theyre both dudes. they grow old together, but ravenpaw gets cancer and dies before barley (he lives to be considered old in warrior cats years). however ravenpaw wanted to be in the same kitty afterlife that barley will go to, so they can be together in kitty afterlife. barley is still alive though as far as we know and might be the oldest living cat in the series now. also i just think its funny to call little kitty cats "old man yaoi"
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jodiexists-art · 25 days
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ramble about your parallel fanon
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Ok thanks for the excuse 2 make a design HEHEHEHE
So to provide a little context on my agent 4, they're an astrophysics student, and stumbled into Marie in octo canyon bc they've been doing their project on the magnetic fields and radio interference in octo canyon/salmonid territory.
I think this is pivotal 2 why cuttlefish recommended her to marina to help w memverse security
I'm also of the opinion that, since nobody else has claimed to be free association I think it should be 4 and the octoling engineers.
I think parallel Canon should have had black and red skins of the hero weapons I think they look ten billion times cooler. And I think they should have had the Sheldon drone. Like if they're going 2 lean into the multiple weapons thing it shoulda been the hero weapons.
Anyway there's an element of like. Because it's a roguelite you can't just remove parallel Canon from the game after you defeat it once, cause its a replayable game yk. But it didn't agree w me that you never really break 4 out of it, where 3 does get freed yk?
So I'm of the opinion that like. After 8 defeats them the first time, they get lucky, and the mask disconnects. After 8 moves onto the next floor, 4 manages to fire themself from the mask, but now they're stuck in the tower, and the lift is evidently occupied. The next time you fight parallel Canon, the other inklings are still there, but 4 isn't.
4 now has access to their own palette, with 1 lucky armour drop chip (so they have the lime colour, and also because I think it's funny, like as in they Dropped the mask.) They get to navigate levels in the same way, but they have to use the stairs. It's not visible in all the stages but in some of them there's huge staircases in the background. Otherwise, they use a rope to climb up and abseil down outside the elevator, and they have to collect pretty much everything they gather from the vending machines, since they can't get chips from the elevator.
Normally they'd have extra security access, but Order is blocking them out (they may be the security expert, but they didn't think to account from the security risk coming from Inside the memverse, solely protecting it from external influence.
I haven't bashed out what happens narratively after that but I think 4 and smollusk should be besties. They should make friends and hang out. And I feel bad for smollusk being left alone in the memverse, hence the tamagotchi, I think 4 should bring it with them and show them the outside world :3
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ms-scarletwings · 3 months
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Irken Zim’s 8 biggest fans
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For funsies! As we are well aware, this guy has a lot of gut-haters and censurers across the galaxy. Over his long years of life, he’s gained a proud infamy from every corner of the Irken empire, all the way to the fringes beyond, and the number of critics snapping at his heels only grows with every adventure. Whole civilizations sit at their seat’s edge waiting for this invader’s downfall, but what of those who defy all odds, expectations, maybe even logic? Even devils somehow find worshippers, even criminals get fan mail, and even Invader Zim has someone rooting for him within the 4th wall. Weirdly quite a handful of them, actually, let’s recount.
8. Table Headed Service Drone Bob
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It’s humorous, how odd circumstance can make for strange advocacy. The show’s universe operates on the rule of funny, and Bob just so happened to be in the right place and time to comedically become the only Irken alive with something to gain from Zim’s success, and so much to lose for his failure. The sheer unfairness of what the Tallest put him through along with Zim serving some hope for a miracle ticket out of his low standing seemed to snap something in him, even if just for an episode. It would make sense for anyone in his position to have a much more dampened love for their society and leaders, to the point where cheering on its greatest enemy would be preferable than another moment of being a doormat. An underdog rooting for an underdog, even if for purely selfish and coincidental reasons.
7. The Judgementia Control brains
Even more deliciously ironic, isn’t it- That Zim’s praise was be sung once from the very bottom rung of Irken society and then again from the highest spike? What better to follow up poor Bobby than another victim of astronomical circumstance, or rather, three victims together? The nutshell recap of “The Trial’s” plot climax spells out the tragedy of, what is basically Irk’s highest court officials, to become he first ever victims of Zim’s malignant code becoming a contagion. They’ve joined the Fanclub, even if against their will, and all the better for Zim this time to have support from such a high place, seeing that it literally saved his hide in this instance.
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6. Dib Membrane
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Yeah, that’s freaking right. He’s on the list. You think being a hype man and a mortal rival are mutually exclusive? You either haven’t been watching enough DBZ or you haven’t been watching enough Hellsing and should fix that. Anyway, and I’m speaking within the actual canon dynamic of these two… it is very important to Zim that Dib is perceived as a formidable opponent to bluster his own ego, and vise versa. Dib is not in any self-serving position to accept what an actual mess Zim’s operation is, even though he has more evidence of the alien’s horrible tactics, nonsense plans, failures, etc. than anyone else on the planet. Gaz can see Zim for exactly what he is and why fighting him doesn’t have to be this 24/7 urgent priority. Dib refuses to get that because stopping Zim’s pop-up schemes only keeps the score tied for them. They’ve both been at this long enough to get incredibly frustrated with the lack of progression regarding the big picture goals, taking over the world, and exposing a live alien to the world, respectively. I don’t think he has to keep describing this space goblin as some ultra-cunning master of villainy, or GIR as this nefarious minion because that’s what he actually thinks of them, but because if he admits otherwise, that’s not a great reflection of his own merit for the obvious reasons. Just the presentation of another dimension’s version of himself succeeding against Zim before him causes a spiral of self doubt, just as it can bring Zim to a minor panic watching other invaders leaving him in the dust. Dib wants this guy to be a challenge worth the victory lap when he finally gets what he’s been fighting so hard for.
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When Zim is getting on some truly idiotic antics, Dib doesn’t actually revel in his disorganized stupidity, but meets it with a baffled or annoyed disappointment. Like me watching a character I thought was super badass suddenly do something that reveals them to just be utterly lame. Too often he almost comes off like he is critiquing Zim’s performance as a villain rather than,, you know, the fact that Zim is a villain in the first place. It more than once has led to accidentally giving the guy new ideas or pointers on how to do his own job better once in a while. If I were in Dib’s place I would under NO circumstances be giving Zim advice or corrections on what he’s doing “badly” when it comes to the invader thing, but, whatever makes you feel cool & smart, you little dork. There’s also the whole “Dib’s hatred for Zim belies his geeky fixation with aliens broadly” angle I’ve mentioned here or there before, and don’t mind to again. Studying/stalking Zim is only partially about defeating him. His curiosity over Irken tech, biology, etc. is still coming from a place of genuine scientific passion, as literally all of us know. And of course, on occasion the two make for unlikely allies against much bigger shared enemies.
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5. Minimoose
Oh come on, how much could I even have to say about this moose-weapon? He has two fathers and is fully aware that Zim is one of them. Assuming we all here know about the cute Florpus quote; no need to recap the whole existence of the lil guy.
4. Invader Skoodge
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Now this guy… this guy ain’t right. Exactly here, at this (I say with love) loser of an invader, we reach two tipping points when it comes to Zim-affinity. One, the tipping point where Zim ceases to ask for and ceases to appreciate the toadying. Two, the point where I actually kind of struggle to find any rational explanation for the toady’s behavior. Like I’ve tried and I genuinely don’t know how to put together how Skoodge keeps jumping into this position other than ‘it’s that funny’ or some weird familiarity from smeethood factor. All of the invaders know what Zim has done and what he’s capable of. He’s a consistent terrorist of his own kin and defamed as the greatest disgrace to the Empire. The two options for how to feel about Zim as any random Irken soldier are fear, and/or loathing. If Skoodge were just neutral or indifferent of Zim, that’d be pretty freaking odd. But Skoodge interacts with Zim on the level of at least a lukewarm acquaintance, readily even deferring to his command, despite the fact that he nearly dies every single time he does so. He survives miles of being chased by a monster on Hobo-13, he makes it to the finish line, and his first reaction is to let Zim know he’s made it in one piece. He decides to lay low and slack off after getting fired (into the blighted surface of Blorch) and out of the entire universe to choose from, he decides to go hole up at Zim’s place and stay conveniently out of the way for some time. Dude finally shows himself in the unfinished scripts, and it’s to motherfucking help Zim troll around with Dib. I’m up at night wondering what is going on in Skoodge’s head because he’s n o t an idiot. He’s a real invader in all other respects, just as competent and nationalistic as the rest of them. Easily suggestible, yes, but not stupid. There’s basically no way for him to be ignorant of the big lie the Tallest sold Zim, yet he chooses not to utter a peep on the matter. Pity? A bizarre sense of solidarity?? A delusional one sided friendship??? Don’t look at me like I know other than the fact that he’s on our protag’s team, in spirit. The wannabe Irwin to Zim’s Billy, essentially.
3. Keef
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So yeah of all things to blow Skoodge’s unhealthy attachment clean out of the water, we stumbled into this freak of a human child. Keef is a loyal compadre to a fault. A huge, creepy fault. Kid was originally supposed to make a return as well, wherein he was no less of a stubborn stalker than already proven once. And extra points for the irrational selflessness. Even while demonstrating an understanding of what Zim did in Dark Harvest, possibly even with the memory of that whole squirrel incident, he still wishes nothing but for the ability to put a smile on his green friend’s face.
2. The Amoeboid Cult
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And when none thought that the scary conviction Zim garnered on Earth could be his biggest fans, you find this little ditty in the comics, and it starts turning into an irresponsible god analogy fairly quick. The short recap is that following a crash on a strange planet, the Voot Runner starts leaking fluids that inadvertently spark abiogenesis, which results in the creation of a rapidly evolving race of blob-things. Seizing an opportunity, Zim at first demands their followership, and then shortly after gets fed up with it as he did the previous fanatic on the list. Nonetheless, the cell people continue to reproduce and age thousands of years their time in the span of a couple minutes, never losing that zeal for their unintentional creator, even going so far as to repair the cruiser despite Zim’s rejection of them. Out of what little they gathered about him during his short visit, they correctly learned he’s a destructive god who planned to abandon them as soon as he could. Their last wish as a civilization? For this god to also obliterate them, as final treat. Such was their devotion that it even left Zim himself completely baffled for a moment when its full depth was revealed.
1. GIR
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You watch this show, right? Yeah? Henchman and sidekick number one? Chaotic thing this whole fandom can’t decide to perceive as an adoptive child or a talking pet? He may not be as competent in pleasing Zim’s wishes as minimoose, or as focused, but his heart and loyalty are ultimately with their intended master, unconditionally and for as long as this setting has continued.
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skitskatdacat63 · 9 months
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I meant to write more for a pt 2 lore post earlier but didn't end up doing so, so pls take these AU sketches(Mark & Jense and then some assorted sketchies)
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#i should never have drawn them as catboys bcs now they appear as catboys in mind half the time 😭😭#its only on paper but i drew more catboy sketches of them than whats included here 😭#seb reminds me of my cat where hes being all nice and cuddly and then will bite you out of nowhere#seb in his frilly nightgown is very important to me!!!#i meant to draw both of them in nightgowns but brain wasnt worked too well tonight#so thats why these are mostly half finished#the bottom seb is too remind myself i have a regular art style 😭😭😭#mark in this au is so funny to me. bro is tortured by having to be with seb like practically every waking moment#he basically is a offically provided live-in bestie 😭😭#*based on real life thing. i think its funny how you can be royalty yourself +#but bcs youre not part of the imperial family you can still be reduced to the job of having to dress the emperor 😭#^ so thats mark in this au#seb promoted him to an important role when he became emperor but still makes mark do his old duties 🤭🤭#jense is in charge of all the horses and transport and things. thus: ye olde horse girl#im sorry but in historical AUs all f1 drivers are legally obligated to be horse girls. its literally canon#so sorry for the catboy sketch. it will happen again.#but ig i dont wanna go too deep into lore stuff in these tags cause yeah. another post in the works!!#i think about it and have talked about it a lot. but its hard to like contain all of it to bullet points and such#my brain is not built for writing fic i think so idk of youll ever get that from me. but lore yes i will deliver#sebastian vettel#fernando alonso#jenson button#mark webber#f1 fanart#formula 1 fanart#catie.art.#formula 1#boy king au
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bijoumikhawal · 9 months
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I've gotten tired of making a post like this every few months so let's just fire a few of these off, and feel free to add on! Tropes you should at minimum reconsider using when you write or talk about Julian Bashir:
Mentions of "harem" pants, "Arabian nights" aesthetics, etc. These are improper terminology (that feeds into racist ideas) for real things, and when using that terminology those things are often being misrepresented. For my part, if you would actually like to know about the material culture of the Middle East and North Africa, I'm a "hobby" researcher of that very topic and will readily answer asks about it- with the caveat that I mostly know about Egypt, and I'm not the best person to ask about Sudanese specific culture even though I know a little, and I don't know much about Indian or Pakistani fashion (mentioning because these seem to be the most common cultures brought up around Julian).
comparisons to monkeys, apes, the word "simian". This should be obvious but it happens a fair amount, and it's almost comedic given a common trope is to comment on how much Garak hates being compared to a lizard.
This is separate but the way some people use mammalian tips from writing xenofic and trying to understand how an alien would think and categorize things into something that feels very exoticifying. It's not a "full stop, do not do this" but it is something I've noticed
Jokes about how undesirable Julian is. He's the exception that proves the rule about fandom's obsession with white twinks and a rare example of a brown nerd who isn't pinned into the "Couldn't sleep with a woman if they were the last two people on earth" box. I'm not saying we can't make fun of how he flirts just- Stay clear of Raj BBT territory
Conversely: my most hated garashir trope is when the author makes Julian's libido a problem by making him inconsiderate, cruel, and outright manipulative in service of his dick, and the writing often makes it clear they're connecting this to his masculinity. Julian does do some really stupid shit when it comes to his relationships, but this particular way of trying to incorporate this into writing him is just OOC, and you need to not confuse writing Julian's canonical robust and healthy sex life with negative stereotypes about lecherous Black and brown men. There's fics that pull off Julian being a bit of a dick or manipulative well- such as Salt the Earth or the ageswap series (at least where I last left off on it).
making his eyes green or blue. I have the same eye color as Siddig, more or less, and while it's technically hazel (or olive, as some people call it) most people think it's brown and most lighting makes it look brown. If you look at screencaps of Julian, you'll notice it also most of the time, looks brown. This sounds minor if you haven't experienced it, but it has a real and very negative impact on people's self image.
Older one but to be clear: if you're writing Julian as explicitly Muslim, find and replacing "god" with "allah" in English text is not how Muslims (or Arabic speakers in general) use the word? It is really funny to read, but please...
Over focusing on Julian as British. There's a long, LONG conversation that could be had about the dynamics of assimilation and how European racism (ime) very specifically views it as progressive to strip people of their culture and thinks they're causing the problem if they don't go along with it that would need its own post and which I've had with white fans before and feel exhausted thinking about- but to put it simply, there is no such thing as "just British", even for white Englishmen.
Yes the inverse is also wrong but I really haven't read a fic newer than 2014 guilty of that lmao and I think some of the more recent complaints about it are overblown, given I've read only a few fics recently published that delve into Julian as a Brown/African Person and I enjoyed them
I would personally appreciate it if fic writers were a little more balanced about cultural discussions honestly. If you write a lot about Cardassian culture, it'd be nice if Julian’s background was discussed. I won't say that kind of research is easy (again, I do this as a "hobby" that's very important to me, it's actually really annoying and difficult sometimes), but it is possible. I recently talked about how not doing this kind of mentally slots Julian into a "white guy" role.
This is not a matter of me policing your "artistic expression". I have no control over what you do. I would just like for fandom, a hobby I do for fun, to be a place where people stop being racist in a way that directly impacts me.
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flyndragon · 2 months
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I really want to write an AU where Ezra travels back in time - specifically de-aged and sent back to Obi-wan's time on Melida/Daan.
Because even though this is a super shitty situation Ezra's kinda... thriving? Like all of this is so firmly in his wheelhouse its funny.
Ezra's been living on his own starving and stealing since he was 7. He's being doing guerilla warfare for most of his adolescence. As soon as this boy joins the cause it's hell. Every adult is getting mind-tricked. The young are now stealing everything that is not nailed down. Ezra's connecting with any local megafauna to cause distractions. He's teaching 'child soldier 101 classes'.
And emotional support too! Comforting kids mourning their dead parents? That was just his own character arc! Comforting kids whose parents are warmongering assholes? That's just Sabine's thing! A jedi that doesn't believe he's worthy of being a jedi? Kanan.
idk if obi-wan would be a little scared of this war kid or think he's the fucking coolest padawan obi-wan's ever met in his life. Lets say the latter because its funny to me if they're both kinda obsessed with each other. Ezra definitely hears the whole story of how Obi got to the planet and is 2000% on His Side immediately. Ezra is complimenting Obi-wan constantly cause he canonically can't shut up and obi-wan is clushing so hard All of the Time.
Anyway, when the war ends Obi-wan and Qui-gon bring him back to coruscant with them to present him to the council, ect. ect.
Ezra is conflicted about whether he even wants to join the order officially as a padawan. On one hand, it would be really nice to have actual traditional jedi training. On the other hand he really is going to have to do several high profile murders sometime in the next decade? two decades?, and doesn't know if the jedi should be connected to him lol.
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mspaintbrush · 21 days
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Mauga thoughts
He is a biter
He WILL bite you if you hold him down
The only one who can really keep Mauga under control after Baptiste left Talon is Doomfist
Doomfist uses violence for that (of course) (he has been bit while holding him down) (uses his gauntlet hand around Maugas head now)
Mauga refuses to let Moira experiment on him (even though she'd love to), my boy has had enough of unpermitted alterations to his body, even though he liked the changes the first time
He really doesnt get along with Reaper
Reaper is very bitter/serious/stern about the fights and Talon's mission, completely opposite of Mauga who sees it as a game and a fun way to spend his time
Reaper tells Mauga regularily that this isnt a game and that he should stop playing with dying men
Mauga is not impressed by any of reapers threats, he finds them amusing at best
#1 reaper bully, walks through him on purpose on a daily basis just cause he likes the feeling of the smoke on his skin
Sombra sympathizer
There are not many other fun people to spend time with at Talon anyways
Sombra is weary of him and pretty quickly saw through his happy and laid-back mask when she watched him in battle
But she also doesnt have many optional conversation partners at the base, so they hang out and bully Reaper together
Sombra is fascinated with how he gets his hair so nice and fluffy (the secret is the blood of your enemies)
Pranks him sometimes by putting sticky notes on his back that he cant reach because he is too buff
He can play Ukulele or at least owns one (canon)
It used to belong to Baptiste
Mauga took it from his things after he left Talon, its his only reminder of their time together
Sometimes Mauga just holds it and plays a few notes when he is reminiscing
Together with his guns one of the only things he hates people touching
Could work really well with Lucio if he wanted to
Maybe I'm writing Lucio a bit very naive here but I feel like he could be fooled by Mauga's personality (and Mauga would take full advantage of that)
Like he would bring this dude to the base á la "hey guys meet my new friend he plays ukulele and is really fun" with Mauga just grinning as everyone stares in horror
Baptiste used Mauga as a couch during their Talon times (illegal murder operations dont really provide comfortable resting places, so you make due)
Both miss it, both have no one close enough to replicate the feeling (which doesnt mean they dont try)
Mauga leans his guns on his side or the ukulele on his chest, but since everyone has enough common sense to not go anywhere near him thats all he can do
I think it would be funny if during a mission brief a very tired Sigma leans onto him (he doesnt have this famous common sense to really notice the danger radiating off Mauga) and everyone holds their breath as it happens. Against all odds Mauga doesnt say anything as he quietly enjoys it. Its not a common occurence, much to Mauga's disappointment.
Baptiste sits on the side of the couch, owns a very big pillow and the tendency to lean onto people if he gets very tired (since most people arent a 6 foot mountain of muscle  though, they dont really have the necessary strength to hold him)
Some eventually catch on and subliminally try to persuade Reinhardt to sit next to Baptiste more often. Maybe Reinhardt notices it too, but definitely not as the first lets be honest. (Reinhardt is the general couch for everyone in Overwatch who wants to, i dont make the rules)
Mauga's body needs a LOT of nutrients and protein to keep up its shape, more so with him working out on the side, so this man is constantly eating
This guy is a foodie, gets really gnarly when he's hungry and even more ruthless and unpredictable
Fish is a main food in Samoa, but since Mauga has a strong connection to the ocean and the ecosystem behind it I dont think he would eat any fish he didnt catch himself. And he doesnt trust Talon enough to verify where the fish came from. So no fish for him right now.
Is a sweettooth, there a lot of sweet samoan dishes featuring coconut milk and fresh fruit from the island
He probably often complains about the cheap quality of the fruits Talon have to offer him. They get picked too early before truly ripe or just dont seem to have the same intense flavor as an island grown fruit would have.
Can and will crack a coconut easily by hand. Or rather by teeth.
(I wonder if that is humanly possible)
(I looked it up. You need around 610N to crack open a coconut. Humans can bite with about 1000-1400N. So its possible. Crazy.)
Being used to warm and tropical weather he struggles with any mission too far up north. He has to wear more clothing during those, limiting his mobility and effectiveness.
Probably has a hard time finding fitting clothes in general, Talon has a special seamstress just for this case. (And for Doom and Sigma too probably, they are huge)
Is a very well educated man and still keeps up with recent studies and research, especially revolving around marine biology.
He doesnt show this side of him in public, only reading when he is alone in his room.
Sigma is able to gain access to whatever books and publications he wants, nobody really double checks because they dont care or wouldnt understand anyway. So Mauga puts his desired books on Sigma's list and takes them from his lab once they arrive.
Sombra picks up on this eventually, since she spends a lot of time with Sigma. What will she do with this information? Who knows.
Sigma isnt aware of this but does wonder why there are books about non-physics topics around. Sometimes he looks at the colourful reef pictures.
Scuba Sigma - the origin story
favourite animal: shork
He knows how vital they are for marine life and relates to them.
They look and are told to be extremely aggressive, but arent. They still are incredibly powerful and efficient killing machines though. There is a nice metaphor compared to himself here. Somewhere.
Corrects anyone badmouthing sharks and doesnt care if that feels "out of character" to bystanders
Always wanted to learn how to surf but is lacking balance and a normal body size. And since being in Talon, time. And water. Everything really, but he thinks about it sometimes.
Good swimmer, his body shape is not super helpful but he makes up for it with great strength and form
Loves to dive, not necessarily in whole gear, but he can hold his breath longer than average
Generally just enjoys being in water
Knows how to catch fish (of course)
Usually you'd catch fish with a traditional net or maybe hook and rod, but Mauga knows how to spearfish and sometimes does it to show off
If there are no current missions he helps out carrying cargo and other equipment around Talon quarters. Its something of a practical workout for him.
Not a drinker. One or two bottles of beer at most. He wants to be in full control and aware of his sorroundings at all times.
He does pretend to be more intoxicated to provoke bystanders to let their guard down.
If he truly gets wasted he is the silent type. The "stares at you uncomfortably from a corner"-type. His extroverted and noisy facade disappears, revealing the cunning and sadistic spirit inside.
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weebsinstash · 11 months
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So we agree, the Spot is just as fuckable as Miguel. These two are both incredible, just both at INSANELY opposite ends of the spectrum. Like I want Miguel to breed me, where as I feel like I want the same with Spot just where I’m more the dom? Idk tho, Spot at the end of the movie def would go back to his s/o’s apartment while waiting for Miles, def would be hate fuckin you con or noncon style, but would also def be so apologetic after he had cum a couple times
Spot who hates Miles Morales so fucking much because he not only caused him to mutate in the collider incident but the accident killed his s/o/crush (you) and now it's like "oh, hey, this is funny but, would you believe me if I said we used to date? Ha ha anyways i was thinkin we could pick up where we left off :)" And maybe he's either telling the truth or he's full on delusional, thinking you two were in love and "sending all kinds of passionate signals" when in reality you were just like, being a respectful coworker and being polite to him and shit you'd be pretty uh in danger if his original you survived and became some sort of multiverse jumping being as well because then he's, you know, CHASING YOU, he thought you had been gone forever, he thought he had lost everything in his life important to him, literally everything, his own physical body becoming unrecognizable, unable to have love, respect, even just a normal life, truly becoming a broken man, but here you are, still left behind, maybe even just as he remembers you visually
I saw a post saying he has Sans energy and it's like. Yeah actually. Funny Little Man Energy. Except The Spot is kind of a poor little wet cat out in the rain who's a lil pathetic tbh and Sans is like a sarcastic troll in a non serious well intentioned way but, the Energy is similar kwim.
Jonathan just being like half apologetic half self indulgent freak the whole time
God. Fucking. Just picture this. The whole thing happens to him, you know, the movie stuff, he's out for revenge, constantly disrespected by Miles, other villains, he lost his entire way of living a normal life, literally, he doesn't even have the peace of having a normal body anymore, AND he lost his beloved "fiance" in the accident and he's just absolutely going insane and he finds you again, YOU you, HIS you, somehow survived, and he goes to you to speak to you AND YOURE JUST LIKE "WAIT WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU" he was just projecting the whole time and you're confused and it just shatters his fantasy but you know what he decides he should get whatever he wants now, take whatever he wants, his powers open all kinds of doors, and he'll make this universe the one where he has you
Also if Spot doesn't have genitals or maybe you're using like, the Wookie rule I think is rhe term for it, he could literally get you any kind of toy or anything from anywhere. He could do ANYTHING to you, watch anything happen to you, use Any kind of gadget on you that he wanted in place of whatever he may be missing. Since he only has so many physical capabilities, he might as well get his pleasure in the satisfaction and pride of bringing you to, like, orgasmic insanity
Miguel just. God I have a draft for him, right, based off of the concept of Reader slowly kind of being pushed to a mental breaking point by Miguel pushing them to do a specific job in the Spider Society only THEY can do, and he's pushing you and telling you its for the greater good because it does legitimately hold the multiverse together, it keeps people from breaking canon, it's a memory wiping thing, but it's emotionally and mentally taxing on you and the nature of the job makes you a social pariah and, it's a struggle of wanting to hate and refuse him for pressuring you into all this when you actually WANT to trust him as your friend and leader and even want to love him vs also he's lowkey taking advantage of the stress the job causes on you so he can be the only one there to support you when you're in crisis mode cause, yeah its for the greater good, and gosh he hates seeing you cry such big fat tears, but it IS so nice to get to be the one to hold you when you're so desperate for some kind of anchor and support that you hug him. God I bet hugs from him are something else....
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