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jsuhosh94127 · 4 months

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2023 | 12-29-23 5:16 PM

hi, blog!

ooooh, year 2023 is about to end! so, as a little recap, i'll be posting and jotting some of the highlights, experiences, and learnings i've gathered this year. so, this might take really long to capture everything

ps. please bear with me while we go through together this journey-and i'm already asking for some understanding that there will be grammatical errors as i just typed this on the fleet of the moment. hahaha (while listening to paramore! what a throwback ><)

during new year, i never have ever thought that this year would bring out so many things. but, i prayed and really put my faith and heart to wish and look forward that this year would bring all the unexpected, great, and wonderful blessings. and, well, truly! all good and great things happened. as a summary:

i graduated magna cum laude, like boi!!! that's one of the unexpected things i received. i have these inferiority issues that keeps me from taking pride of what i achieve. whenever i would look at my grades on the portal i need to have peptalk myself that i did my best and really put effort on every points i have.

i passed licensure examination for teachers. this one too. i cried the night after the exam. i wasn't able to enroll on any review center because y'know budget and priorities. i submitted papers and the exam fee a day before the last day of submission. i forgot to take my noa from the cashier and took us a week or so to get it. those days, the review days and waiting days are tooooo long. there are times i would cry myself to sleep and go on work like nothing happened. as all i have are the everyday afterwork review and the 3day in house free review by my alma mater, PNU, who called me as i was endorsed by the dean. anyway, i realized that i really did put effort and prayers and having 90.20 average for the exam is really awesome! (thank you get it-keshi and 7rings-ariana grande for reminding me to always get up and get that bag)

i have a decent paying and a work that i finally learn to love. it all started 4 months before our graduation and my schedule is all free so i decided to work immediately. after our finishing school, i immediately prepared my cv and requirements, look online for school vacancies. then, tadda! i am where i am now. funny thing about my employment process is that, there are some applicants before me and the school is still on the screening process. and there is still one person after or before me, i think (?) but after my demo and interview, the school directress asked me if i am readily available to go tomorrow to start my job. ofcourse, i said yes and yippie yup, i love my bffs now. hahahaha. >< even though i can't even have a me time as they always hug and bug me.

buy things that are pink. buy things for myself, buy things i want buy make up, and continue do my hobby. mag-ganda gandahan all day, every way. hahaha

groceries and things for the fam. this one is more of a breadwinner and ate duties, though sometimes i need to sacrifice my wants, it feels fulfilling to give and see my mom's smile. i luv it so much!!!!

not hesitating to buy and have and give things just because i want to.

learn and try new things! i learned how to do eyeliner precisely and perfectly. i was able to eat on different food shops and try new things (with my bf ofc, because if i don't like it he knows what to do! hahahha :P) i also learned how to handle student and people with special needs. i learned that life to each and everyone of us is different, and that's really beautiful.

new friends and reconnected to old friends.

prayers, talking to yourself, and having alone moments. this helped me during the times i am sick. having muscle pains everyday is really irritating but having mindfulness techniques helped me to get by and being open on your condition will greatly make life a little easier.

forgive. freely and wholeheartedly. myself and those people i need to so i can run free from the hurt. idk, but for me forgiving is a must so i can move and see life in a clearer view. but, yeah, i don't forget and i know the place and boundaries and all. i always say it to myself that when i made a mistake "oopsie, i can't undo it, but maybe i can be kinder the next time around." it may sound cheesy and too optimistic, but talking to myself like a 5 year old kid, heals.

listened to new artists. hindi na si keshi at doja cat lang. hahahaha. i learned to go back and listened to the songs when i was moving on, when i was just barely living, and when i am on my lowest. now, i'm listening to them casually reminiscing each moment. acjkkk, life is so nice. some parts of me healed through it.

being grateful. idk, but being grateful to whatever it is, makes me feel better and knowing that if i can handle this, i'll be able to handle much beautiful and greater achievements or things.

basta, marami pa. marami pa akong gustong ilagay sa true lang. i just can't put it here all. should i make a part two? jk. hahaha. but all in all, i want to give praise to God. for making me safe, protected, provided, guided, and sane this year. there's a lot of struggles, left and right. but, knowing that there is someone or an entity that listens to me and where i can speak to anytime makes me feel less alone. (im not lonely, there are many people i love and loves me.) it's just there are thoughts that i think i always keep to myself, and having times where i just look up and blurt out words, makes me feel more connected.

this is taking too long na ata? reader check, press 1. hahaha. until next year again my friends! i pray and hopefully, we may see life in a greater light. i hope we could list more achievements and wonderful things, do greater and kinder things. either be it small or big, may it sound like a leaf on a river or a tree in the forest, every effort to support, be kind, and do for the love of other is the best thing we can do all year round. most importantly, be kind to yourself. always. love it and help it grow. may we become rich in finances, love, life, beauty, and be hearty as always. may 2024, bring the success we all work and put effort for.

i hope than whenever and wherever we are may we grow and bloom and shower everyone around us with love and kindness!

i love you all! <3

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sugawarassoulmate · 2 years

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Kenma x attaboy!! 🍑 My baby boy Kenma with lactation kink too 🤧🥺 Want him begging and crying 😢

hahahha i made him a bit of a switch lol i couldn't help it 👉🏾👈🏾

words: 610

cw: fem!reader, dom!reader, switch!kenma, lactation kink, breast feeding, mentions of pregnancy/childbirth, mommy/daddy kink, restraints, minors dni

“more please,” he slurs, wishing he could reach up and touch you. he hated when you tied him up like this. he was a good boy, he could control himself. why couldn’t you trust him? he tries to get more of you, wants your body touching every part of him. “please, mommy, more…”

after you had given birth to your daughter, there were insecurities brewing in your head that kenma might not be as attracted to you anymore. you definitely felt unsexy in the months after childbirth, your body had changed in ways that made you self-conscious with your precious baby needing constant care, you didn’t put much effort into your appearance anymore.

but somehow your husband found you even more attractive to the point where he couldn’t keep his hands off you. when your breasts started ballooning up near the end of your pregnancy, they became kenma’s personal playthings—especially when you started producing breast milk.

in the weeks before kaho was born, you complained about how full your breasts were from all the milk you had. you didn’t want to start pumping before she was born but you constantly found yourself in tears from the pain.

enter kenma who, out of curiosity, wondered what your breast milk tasted like. so he latched onto your sore nipples and it turns out he couldn’t get enough of your sweet nectar. since then, he was ready to help whenever your tits became too heavy.

kaho was born a few weeks later and she’s a big drinker, always getting fussy when she hasn’t been fed in a while. kenma loved his little girl more than anything but now he’s finding himself having to compete with his daughter for some personal time with you. you would put her down for a nap and kenma would slither behind you, hoping to get some time under your shirt, but you were so worn out most days that you had to turn him down.

but kaho was with your mother this weekend which means your body belongs to kenma once again.

“do you think you deserve it?” you ask, grinding on his lap while he feebly tries to get his mouth on your soft mound. kenma mewls underneath you, breaking into a sweat because all he wants is to drink from you.

“i’ll be good,” he says, golden eyes welling up as if the tears are about to flow. you take pity on him, brushing the hair out of his face to bring your tits to his mouth. and like a moth to a flame, kenma attaches himself to you immediately, drinking from you as if his life depends on it. “thank you.” he grunts, milk spilling from his lips.

he treats you as if you’re his last meal, sucking and biting at your chest like he won’t get another chance. in the meantime, you’re rubbing your clothed cunt against him, knowing any second he’s going to burst. “gonna cum for me?” and kenma nods against your breasts, not wanting to tear himself away for even a second. it’s so cute. “cum for me, baby boy.”

kenma practically whimpers against your tits, humping into you like a dog before he cums in his pants. it doesn’t stop his lips from abusing your chest. you finally push him off, your essence falling from his mouth. even now, kenma doesn’t look completely satisfied even though your nipples are red and raw from his lips on them.

“you taste so fucking good, mommy,” he breathes, the submissiveness leaving his voice with every second. with hunger in his eyes, kenma fights against his restraints. “now untie daddy so he can fuck you.”

sugawarassoulmate 3k follower event

#haikyuu #haikyuu smut #kenma #kenma kozume x reader #kenma kuzome #kenma x reader #kenma smut #kenma kozume smut #kozume kenma #kozume kenma x reader #kenma kozume #haikyu #haikyu smut #haikyu x reader #haikyuu x reader #peach has 3k followers #🍑#🍑kenma

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radio-charlie · 2 years

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hey charlie this is random n pls dont answer if u kena sai/just dont want but how did u start community work?

kena sai hahahha i love that. tbh it all started on... twitter sigh i know i shit on that place as regularly as my bowel movements but it remains one of the best places to get to know malaysian progressives + activists when u are stuck inside most of the time and/or are not a natural irl socialiser. its ok if they are not active there asalkan they are there u know what i mean. so basically i slowly got to know folks there starting 2017 or so, and then as they publicised certain orgs, ongoing efforts etc i began to join in/donate whenever i was able. some things i got to know thru the grapevine - a family friend told me about the pit stop community cafe for instance

coz over the years some ppl had come to understand that i could be trusted w certain things, sometimes i would be informed abt distress calls or asked to be a part of certain projects. thru twitter also i learned that WAO put out a call for volunteer crisis support officers (basically ppl to help man their dv crisis hotline) and thats how i signed up. wtv u learn/whoever u get to know from ur work will greatly aid ur own efforts as well - during the dec floods last year i was lucky to be able to seek help from the friends i'd made over the past few years for some flood relief efforts i was organising - it was moving to see ppl across the political spectrum coming together to help. even random ppl from other countries on tumblr chipped in. honestly w/o everybody i would have taken a lot longer or just flat-out failed haha.

sadly there is much else i cant go into detail abt coz cannot compromise security. if u and i do the relevant work together someday u might see why haha. but hey good news is, if u are interested in getting involved too, u dont have to go thru the slow-ass simmering process i mentioned - u can dm me to chat anytime and i'll recommend some ppl for u to follow on twitter + some legitimate orgs that could use volunteers right now

and of course if u are struggling w ur own disabilities, just dont have the energy and time to do more because everything is terrible - pls dont beat urself up yea. whenever i scream and yell on here its at these specific ppl in my life whom i know could do better but dont.

thanks for the nice ask and i hope this helps somehow

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mimiwrites2000 · 3 years

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3,5, 18, 20 and 23 for the ask game uwu♡

omg thank you so much for the ask!!

alright let’s get started! this answer is so long omg

Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

OH MY GOD LFJALFJA

Ok I basically love to explain these tiny details in my stories but I never do coz that would be lame, I think

Ok so, Legends is filled with symbolisms and a ton shit of foreshadowing, and I can’t really talk about them coozzz I don’t wanna spoil anything. But basically, every single line of every conversation has a future consequence, AND OH GOD I JUST FEEL LIKE THE SMARTEST BITCH IN THIS TOWN LMAO OK OK I’LL STOP

Alright sooo most of the metaphors I use are from real life experiences\emotions. I have notebooks where I write these emotions that happens for short moments, (coz I can’t risk forgetting about them)

One of them, is a sentence from Legends, chapter 13

Armin licked his lips, and he tasted salt, as if he kissed the ocean.

I wrote this line in 2019, before I even started writing Legends. I was on vacation, and just chilling by the beach, I licked my lips, and I felt like I kissed the ocean, so, with a sketch book in hand, I wrote that line, a year later or so, I used that line in Legends

Here’s the line btw, I know I have bad handwriting plz don’t judge

And also I tried to sketch Armin lmao

Anyway yeah, every emotion, is coming from a place within me, and I think that’s the reason why Legends means so much to me

here’s something else that I wrote in the same day in that sketch book:

The feeling on tiny waves bumping softly up against my feet. The air ruffling my clothes. The sea is trying to put me to sleep.

I’m so dramatic I know

What is that one scene that you’ve always wanted to write but can’t be arsed to write all of the set-up and context it would

An Aruani musician AU, I have a scene of Annie, singing on stage, for the first time, singing a love song, as Armin watches in the crowd.

It’s a long ass musician AU that I wrote a rough outline for it, but to be honest I don’t think I’ll ever get around to write it, even though I REALLY want to write this scene gkhajghd

What character that you’re writing do you most identify with?

Both Armin and Annie, and that is the reason I’ve been only writing them for over a year now.

I identify with Annie way too much, much more than I do with Armin.

I guess yall can kinda guess what kinda person I am LMAO

Do any of your stories have alternative versions? (plotlines that you abandoned, AUs of your own work, different characterisations?) Tell us about them.

YES!

In Legends, Mr. Leonhart personality is supposed to be the complete opposite.

In the story, he doesn’t accept Annie’s feelings for Armin, and he’s so adamant that her happiness is in spending the rest of her life with him. (but, hey, don’t hate him, he finally reunited with his daughter after 9 years, and he feels so guilty, he wants to kind of force redeem himself, he’s too scared of losing her again.)

But, in my original draft, he was very accepting of Armin, and I even had a scene in my mind (that is still yet to come in the story) where he walks on them making out in the kitchen, and he either tells his worst dad joke or just walks right out with no comment, and then teasing them the next morning.

In my current version of the story… things don’t go like that.

But here’s the reason behind all this drastic change in character.

A very important plot was added last minute to the story.

The whole Annie losing her memory because of Eren and her father’s plan was NOT supposed to be in the story.

I was already 30k words in when I first published the first chapter, and my plan was to post the chapters as is, without any editing, buttt then, after posting a few chapters, I came up with the idea of Eren altering Annie’s memories… and, well, based on that, Mr. Leonhart character had to be completely changed.

And if you’ve been keeping up with Legends, you would notice that I used to post almost every week for the first month and a half or so, then every three weeks, and now, every few months, and it’s because of this plot change, I basically had to rewrite the story all over again, which is probably the best decision I’ve made in my life, but that’s a whole other topic and this answer is already getting too long.

What’s the story idea you’ve had in your head for the longest?

Oh… hmmm… well, probably Legends, other than that, there’s this new au that I’m working, I’m hoping I could share it soon uwu

Oh God it was so fun to ramble gfjakjda thank you so much for the ask and your efforts in making my tumblr less dead hahahha

I really, really appreciate

Thank you !!

#sorry for answering late!#uwu #writing #armin arlert #Aruani #fanfics

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cat-26 · 3 years

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Sooooooooooo, out of curiosity, what’re your thoughts on Hermitcraft so far? Please feel free to ramble cause I like reading.

I love to ramble!

I am fairly new to mcyt, and Minecraft in general. When I started Hermitcraft, I didn’t really know what to expect. All I knew from Hermitcraft is that they were mainly builders, some were really good at redstone, and that they had a civil war in a previous season. So I started watching Grian’s seaosn 7. And yes, they are great builders and some of them are great at redstone, but HC is so much more. I found a great group, they have a system (that works), respect each other’s builds and chests.

Okay I’ll add a cut here because I like rambling too much and this got long...

My first introduction to SMPs was SMP Earth, then Dream SMP. In Techno’s SMP Earth streams, I saw that nothing was sacred; people broke into each other’s bases, tried to be sneaky and steal (and Tommy and TimeDeo even tried to glitch into Techno’s base, and refused to pay the compensation, breaking the rp completely). Dream SMP is worse, because they didn’t even have the factions to protect anything; they see anything and everything as fair play. Then I see Hermitcraft, where people have shops where people actually respect prices, leave diamonds alone. There is a huge tower of dimaonds in the middle of the shopping district! And no one touches it! (I know it gets stolen, but you know what I mean.)

Another thing is that, in HC, they actually play the game at its full potential: they have (almost) unlimited resources, farms for everything. Take Dream SMP: I know most farms aren’t allowed, but even then, they are pretty inefficient with what they do have. (It makes sense when you see how the server works, since nothing of value lasts more than 2 streams... the only nice base is Awesamdude’s, which is really far from spawn, and even that one looks pale compared to anything on HC) But still. The dragon was killed in the first few episodes and it was an non-event, just a step to get elytras. I repeating myself, but they have such a functioning system! Just look at the system of portals, and the shops, and the signs. The fact that they manage to keep everything working is amazing.

I am loving Season 7′s plotline, and I know I’m not even in the best bit yet. I love the little games they have with each other (see: the button, hermit challenges, head hunting...). The whole idea of sharing among all of them, I love their sense of community and mutual help. I love how they plot and scheme, but it’s always in good fun, they don’t go too far (again, they respect each other, and each other’s builds and boundaries and efforts). The most griefing I have seen is putting mustaches on other’s builds. Or maybe Grian changing a few blocks in Mumbo’s base every time he doesn’t notice the last one (which is so dumb I love it).

I haven’t watched a lot of it this week, but I did watch the mayoral race results! And.... neither Mumbo or Grian voted for Mumbo?? Hahahha that was amazing. (I’m going to be honest, I don’t know much about the rest of the candidates, I only know what I saw from Grian’s POV and from MCC). But Scar won!! And the first thing he did was start removing mycelium.... I’m starting to see what will happen now....

The last episode I saw had a whole music video in it (ep 32), why does Grian keep insisting I have a song stuck in my head for days? First the “Mumbo for mayor” songs, now “gotta work, work all day”...

Grian’s base is so majestic. I love how he has a really big massion and only uses a portion of it, while the rest is an empty shell (which makes sense because of the size). But I still find it so funny that he keeps expanding and adding more things every episode... will this base be over by the time the season ends?

But yeah, in summary: I am loving it, I’m scared at how much content there is, can’t wait to see what happens next!

#thank you for the ask! sorry it took me a little to answer #this has been a very long and rambly answer #sorry i keep comparing it to smpE and Dream SMP.... those are my reference points #hermitcraft #ask #fandomrecycling #cat discovers hermitcraft

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deiliamedlini · 3 years

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Hey super ⭐star⭐! Let us see what you’re most excited about!

Hrmmmm.... well this is going to be a very all over the place answer. You should never have given me free rein with that star hahahha!!

I think the thing I’m most excited for (to be completely honest) is to finally end Alone With You. While I love it, I feel like it has taken so long to write. Plus, I want to move on to other projects because modern settings without fantasy elements are not generally my favorites to write for Zelda, so I’m very excited that there’s only two chapters left! I just need to find the energy to write them! I have no excitement for the next chapter, which is why it’s taking so long. It’s basically the wrap-up kind of chapter, which I just never like writing in general for any fic. But I’m super excited for the last chapter, so I imagine that one will be more exciting to write and then I’ll be sad!

I’m loving the Pirate AU that I started posting! That’s definitely my current most enjoyable thing to work on, and it’s exciting because I’m feeling pretty much like I’m in a safe AU world to be able to push out of my comfort zone and try new things. It’s slow going, but I really want to take my time with this one because I’m putting way more effort into it than I do with 95% of my other fics. 😬

I was excited to try to practice short oneshots too, because I either fail and turn a oneshot into a mini fic, or it’s massive at 13k words 😂. But those short fics and oneshots will probably have to wait for summer when I’ll have more time! I’ve also been sitting here really missing writing Unbroken a lot recently, so I was thinking of doing a few oneshots for that world. Maybe. So I’m very excited at the possibility of all that, but probably not going to be focusing on any of that soon!

OH! AND I have a fic that I LOVE working on that I’ve put into a few WIP Wednesday things that I’m very excited about. It’s a modern military, portal travel AU. I was thinking of maybe making it “episodic” (there’s probably a better word out there than that) rather than totally linear, like I have with Wing and a Prayer, so that there doesn’t have to be dull in-between day-to-day moments just because it’s super linear. And it’ll allow time to move faster, which is something I want because there’s a lot of stuff that just couldn’t happen overnight. So for now, I just love working on the scattered scenes when I get bored because it’s my lowest priority!

So yeah! I’ll cut myself off there! I have so many things I’m excited about and could talk for MUCH longer, but I will spare you and anyone from reading me go on and on about my stuff in detail 😂 SO THANK YOU FOR THE OPPORTUNITY TO RAMBLE ABOUT THE THINGS I’M EXCITED ABOUT!

#asks

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atopearth · 3 years

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Collar X Malice Part 5 - Yanagi Aiji Route (including Criminal Chapter & Mini Review)

Time for the best looking guy Yanagi!! Okay, usually my favourite looking guy is never the route I like the most but we'll see how it goes! He's even got his own common route! Anyway, lmao at the glossary on Enomoto's relationship history, I find it hilarious how it says he's still haunted by the memory of his kindergarten teacher crush being married😂😂😂 HAHAHA, no wonder why Sasazuka doesn't have a good impression of Enomoto. Even on their first meeting, Enomoto gets his profession wrong and then he calls him tiny LOL. Way to be straightforward, I can imagine Sasazuka killing him in his mind already. On the other hand, Enomoto being a starstruck kid with Shiraishi's profiling job is so cute lol. Lmao at Sasazuka and Enomoto being nicknamed the Miso Soup Duo by Shiraishi because Enomoto calls Sasazuka seaweed, and initially Shiraishi called Enomoto Enoki loll. I'm really liking all the guys' first meeting! Especially how even though Sasazuka thinks Enomoto is an idiot, but could also understand and feel his sincerity towards the X-Day cases when they asked Enomoto what his motivations were. Well, it seems like Yanagi failed to protect someone a long time ago and that haunts him to this day, so I can see why he was so anxious over Ichika, and then so relieved to see she was alive (when they first met)🤔 I always felt like Yanagi knew Ichika, but it kinda got brushed to the side so I forgot, but now that he's actually asking her, I wonder where he met her... Yanagi's goal is as sweet as he is. To a certain extent, I have to agree with him that having a normal everyday life where you can talk with friends, eat what you want, go to work and then sleep soundly at night is something we should all be able to have, so Adonis taking that away from the people in Shinjuku makes him strive to return these "normal lives" back to the people. I guess that's understandable, I can't imagine the amount of stress all these people are under tbh. They're all stuck in Shinjuku, every adult has a gun, terrorists are everywhere with murder cases rampant, and the more cases that are discovered, the more the police's powers are questioned, as well as the discovery of more and more corruption within the police. No one feels safe, everyone wants a bit of their normal lives back so they try to live "normally" but at the same time it's not really their life because they're restricted, they're scared and they don't know if they'll even survive by the time X-Day comes.

Anyway, Yanagi is really so gentle and caring. Considering how patient Yanagi really is, it's kinda amusing how much he can't stand Okazaki lol. LMAO when Ichika asked Mukai and Sakuragawa if they were questioning her relationship with Shiraishi because they were interested in him😂😂 I can so imagine their absolute disgust lmao. Even though Kazuki doesn't have the best attitude, you really can't fault him for his sentiments. If December really is the last month they'll all get before X-Day then yeah, it would definitely be worse being stuck at home feeling too scared to go out and missing out on actually living your life, and honestly it's true, I mean that guy who was the game developer got killed at home, so really, staying at home doesn't guarantee your safety, the only thing that guarantees your safety is if you're not targeted and no one will really know if they are until they're about to be killed. When Kazuki said no one has never done anything wrong in their lives, so there's no guarantee that any of us could be safe, it really resonated with me because he's right. Everything has done something "wrong" at least once in their lives and Adonis is judging them for it on their own terms, meaning no one knows if they'll get judged or not because it's not like Adonis is very clear about what kind of people they target. I guess despite Kazuki's brashness, he does think quite a bit about Shinjuku's situation. But yeah, I don't blame Ichika, like dude, Kazuki goes out at 2am?! Yep, I'd be super worried. Anyway, one of the things I hate the most about starting a new route again is having to experience Kazuki and Ichika's bad relationship again. I honestly feel so hurt for Ichika every time he shouts at her saying she doesn't care about him, when he just doesn't notice that even though she's been busy and neglected him to an extent, she always makes sure to do stuff like make him breakfast, dinner etc and tries to communicate with him in the time she does have, whereas he has never made the effort to try to reach out to her and understand her life or situation. Honestly, if he ever just worried about her considering how much danger she's in as a police officer right now with Adonis and all the other crap going on, I would probably be less annoyed by how rebellious he is but really, he still aggravates me because of how inconsiderate and harsh she is. Anyway, I'm glad Ichika called Yanagi to go with her to check on Kazuki, and it was so nice of him to immediately come out to help her. Lmao when he asked Okazaki if he was there and he really was following them😂 HAHAHA, when Okazaki asked Ichika for her phone number and she looked at Yanagi to see if it was okay, and when he said yeah, Okazaki was like yay he got her dad's blessing lmaooo. Yanagi really is everyone's dad😂

How interesting though! Mochida and Ichika joining Investigations HQ to help out with the X-Day cases! I can understand why Ichika is so desperate though, honestly I always thought Ichika was never desperate enough in the other routes hahahaha. Ooh wow, so Yanagi couldn't shoot a criminal during his time as a policeman, and I guess that's probably related to this traumatic past and also Ichika's. Anyway, it's good that he puts a lot of weight to every life and doesn't believe in taking that away from a person, but yeah it would have been hard for him to continue as a policeman like that. Awwww, Ichika, Yanagi and the lost little girl holding hands looking for the girl's mother was sooo cuteeee!🥰🥰 I really liked how talking to Yanagi motivated Ichika to be more frank and honest with Kazuki and tell him what she couldn't before, as well as apologise for always just lecturing him and not trying to understand him. The CG with Yanagi touching her forehead checking if she has a fever and stuff after her "nightmare" was so pretty!! Yanagi has such beautiful CGs like dang, I love them all. Anyway, so great that she got to wake up to Yanagi's face hahahha, and food prepared by him too! It must feel pretty bad for Ichika...she so honestly told him she wanted to know more about him and be a proper partner with him for the investigations and he rejected her and pushed her away..

Akito's plight always breaks my heart. But hearing him so honestly telling Ichika that not only has he recently finally realised that what he hated most weren't the people who harassed his sister but instead himself, and then telling Ichika that he really really regrets joining Adonis, I couldn't help but feel so much pain for him. It's also because of Akito that makes me think that no matter how much I think those people who died in a sense "deserved" what happened to them, what Adonis does for people like Akito will never truly help them with what they truly need and want in their lives after what they suffered. Adonis only takes advantage of them and their weaknesses to do their personal bidding for their own personal revenge against society. No matter how pretty they make it sound as a rebirth of society and from corruption etc, all they're doing is using all the people who need the most help to hurt themselves and others in a pursuit of hatred and revenge. It also makes me think of Sanjou, that even though Adonis supposedly "helped" him with stuff like his revenge etc, in the end Sanjou didn't feel anything more from it than wanting to die. However, it's also undeniable that despite the result, I'm sure a part of these people would be relieved to have been "saved" by Adonis, and probably don't regret it like Akito. I mean, Sugawara Rika's torment was one that Adonis really helped to erase. One thing I always appreciate about Akito is that Kazuki's dreams and trust in Akito is always what makes Akito have the determination to go against Adonis, so it really makes me happy how much their friendship means to them and how much they cherish each other.

I was so happy that Ichika was there to help Yanagi continue to believe in his principles that you don't have to sacrifice people to save others, and that there can be ways to resolve situations without killing. I'm just happy that he didn't need to compromise himself in a state of confusion. As for Yanagi's past, it's something difficult for him to take considering even if it was ruled as self-defence back in the day (when he killed the guy who captured Ichika when she was young) it doesn't change the fact that he killed someone, so I'm sure that weighed heavily on him. I don't think many people would be able to stay the same after experiencing something like that. Just as Yanagi was saved by Ichika's words and could finally overcome a bit of the fear he had in shooting someone, him telling her how much he appreciated her encouraging him and helping him also relieved her of her own trembling fear in shooting in a real field and not just for target practice. I thought it was so cute how Yanagi admitted it was "his lost" and that he wants Ichika as his partner and wants to work hard together now. I'm not surprised that what happened at the Tokyo Metropolitan Building with the hostage situation was something Yanagi encountered before and that's why he found it difficult to face again, especially since in that incident, he continued to negotiate with the suspect even though he had orders to shoot him, and in the end the suspect got violent so others shot him anyway. Honestly, I'm sure that Yanagi understands that it must feel like naivety to want no one to die and not just prioritise "innocents" and "victims" knowing the danger that "criminals" can create especially when you're planted in such a situation, but I can understand a bit of Yanagi's sentiments. Tbh, it has always unsettled me whenever I think about criminals dying, and I understand that there are situations where it can't be helped, especially when it puts so many other people in danger and I would never arrogantly think that these people "could have done better" because I'm sure most people would rather not kill someone if they had the choice to not, but yeah digging into the thoughts and emotions of "criminals" have always been something I've been curious about a lot of my life. And of course even if we just capture criminals, we could probably never really "understand" why they did what they did anyway, but I do naively feel that as long as we keep trying, maybe we can find ways to create less of these situations where so many people wouldn't have to be so "hurt" and turn to crime. Of course, this would probably only apply to some "criminals" though since if crimes only stemmed from people who were hurt somehow in their lives, then things would probably be much simpler, but instead people's lives are complicated and what they choose to do would never come about from just one or two things that happened to them.

Anyway, considering Yanagi's thoughts, I agree with his decision to leave the police. With such doubts in his mind, I don't think he would be able to do what is expected of him, so instead of endangering others with his indecision, he might as well leave or take a break. And coupled with his desire to protect everything and new directives to prioritise shooting criminals performing acts related to X-Day, there's no way Yanagi would be able to stay with the police. And with that, I'm glad that Ichika was the one who was able to make Yanagi realise that alongside these ideals of his, he would still need to shoot people, even if it's not to cause death, but to protect others by disabling them from being able to cause danger. I think it's nice that Yanagi finally feels like he's actually moving forward from his fear of hurting people excessively. But yeah, seeing the past incident from Ichika's and Yanagi's perspectives was pretty daunting in the sense that Yanagi must have felt really bad that his actions caused the kidnapper to become violent with Ichika, and he felt responsible for needing to protect her and save her even more. His reckless and thoughtless actions led to that, and because he was "weak", he knew that if he wanted to protect Ichika properly, he needed to do everything he could to save her, and that meant killing the guy to make it impossible for him to do anything to them anymore. Yanagi was only a high school kid too, so that must have broken him so much. Ooh the kidnapper guy isn't dead, he's the guy in a coma that Yanagi has been visiting for 10 years! I'm surprised that no one took Yanagi to a therapist even if it was ruled as self-defence and he was a minor... It's so adorable how Yanagi was so concerned about whether Okazaki hit on Ichika, he had to message her again in the middle of the night after talking about the serious stuff before lol. I'm not sure if I'm being super suspicious but I feel like Mochida is a part of Adonis haha, sorry if I'm wrong since he's so nice😅 Saeki is expected since I kinda got spoiled haha but I've always wondered about him ever since he said in the beginning of the game that he admired Ichika's ideals or something haha. I'm glad that Yanagi told Ichika that just because Saeki is most likely the one who collared her, she doesn't need to think or deny everything she knows about him, and that if she wants to believe he has his own reasons, she should hear those first before thinking that everything was a lie.

I'm kinda shocked at how ruthlessly Saeki poisoned Ichika with the collar...but I guess I shouldn't be surprised since there were other times he killed her in those bad endings... Anyway, Mikuni's mother being a part of the religious cult that was kinda where Adonis originated is interesting...I wonder what exactly is the difference between Mikuni and Saeki now that Mikuni is willing to discard Saeki to save himself and his other followers? It's so nice of Kazuki care so much about Ichika btw~ Those moments are always so nice and worth it. On the other hand, as usual, Yanagi's CGs are so so beautiful! I love how upfront they are with each other with wanting to hold hands and get some physical support from the other. They're so cute~ It's interesting how Saeki has the same goal as Yanagi, which is to restore normal everyday life to everyone, but I guess mostly for the "weaker" people who have been oppressed and he'll just destroy the other "evil" people who interrupt that peace. Well, aside from it being problematic that he'll probably kill a lot of the population depending on what he regards as evil, but I can understand his sentiments to an extent. If most of the people he wants to get rid of are like people who "destroyed" Sanjou and his other colleagues' lives, or all those stalkers that basically made Sugawara paranoid and crazy, then yeah definitely understandable, but I still think people like Fujii are worth turning things around for. Yeah, Fujii made a lot of mistakes, abused his power and connections, oppressed others to elevate himself, and it's understandable if the ones involved like Isshiki and Ogata never forgave him, but seeing him sincerely regret his actions and want to repent, and continuously go to apologise to Isshiki and do what he can to make amends makes me believe that Saeki obviously thinks everyone is irredeemable. Fujii was terrible, and he can never give back what he took, but he had the potential again to give to others what he gave Enomoto, and I think that's something only someone who has learnt from their mistakes will much more appreciate in doing imo anyway.

Mikuni and Saeki seem much closer than it felt from the other routes, I guess that makes it all the more saddening that he died in Shiraishi's route. Sometimes I wonder if it's more saddening to be Mikuni, the person who has been so close to Saeki all this time and still not feel like he had truly understood him, or would it be more saddening to be Saeki and feel that Mikuni has been by his side all this time but still not really understand what he really wanted? I guess it's sad for both sides... It was really sad to see Mukai cry over Shiraishi, I honestly still feel like she's a better match for Shiraishi than Ichika but that's not important right now haha, but I do enjoy seeing how much it affected Mukai and how much she respects him even if she hates him at the same time lol. I'm so happy that Yanagi finally properly responded to Ichika's feelings!! I'm happy that he's finally come to terms with the idea that he can be selfish and happy as well, like it took a while, but it was honestly worth it with how the confession and everything went, it was so adorable and it really felt like Yanagi could fully desire a future with Ichika. Aww, I love how even Sasazuka made time to come to Enomoto's Christmas party (well Yanagi made the food though but yeah lolol). HAHAHA, I love how Yoshinari noticed something was going on with Yanagi and Ichika (when she told him to stop smoking so much since he's been smoking even more these days), and so Yanagi admitted to it by kissing her on the cheek in front of everyone hahahahaha! It was so funny how Yanagi was blushing after doing that lmaoo. And I died when Enomoto screamed that Yanagi was so cool😂😂 I love how supportive Enomoto is all the time, and I guess Sasazuka as well with his tsundere-ness lol~ Yanagi calling her Ichika instead of Hoshino was so cuteee~ Anyway, I'm kinda disappointed with how Saeki was...handled? Like, considering how much it was the core of the story for Ichika to be the one who was supposed to in a sense "truly understand" and succeed Saeki's ideals, I honestly wanted to hear more of what Saeki desired. Like yeah, he wanted to erase all sorrow and honestly it's understandable, especially when he said to Yanagi and them that there are people who are too weak to be like those who are "strong" and can continue to face forward and power through their "sorrow", because really, if everyone really could soldier on through their sorrow, then no one would be truly "unhappy". Anyway, I just felt it was pretty underwhelming to have Saeki to be the "mastermind" but he probably has less screentime than the other villains in the other routes lol. Otherwise, Yanagi giving a ring to Ichika was so adorable, I love how literally everyone is so curious about their love that they would all go to peek on them lmao. The other endings are pretty interesting, but honestly wayy too short to really feel anything about them. I think the crazed Ichika that wanted to lock up Kazuki and Yanagi so that they would never get hurt from Adonis was amusing.

The Criminal Chapter is kinda interesting, but I think they might have been more useful in the chapters themselves than separately, since I feel like, if you felt something for them, then this only solidifies it, but if you didn't, then nothing can really change your opinion of them now. Personally, I've always liked quite a few of them though, so I did appreciate Ogata being fleshed out with the departure of his wife, I think it's more saddening that what caused her to leave wasn't really because she lost faith in Ogata himself but because she couldn't handle the pressure from everything that came from it. But yeah I think that would have made him a more empathised character in Enomoto's route, since I feel like in the route, they focused more on him hating the police and justice itself rather than exploring directly his pain itself, which I think would have made him a more interesting villain for that route. Hana didn't change for me, because it was pretty expected, considering how "normal" her reason was, her obsession and craziness was probably the worst, and probably the most uncomfortable to watch because out of all the victims, Enomoto's relation to Fujii and hearing about his story really made Fujii's death that much more personal. Akito's was definitely really tragic, because seeing Akito's attitude towards his sister before her death, and even calling her creepy like all the other bullies did made me further understand how much Akito hated himself the most. I always feel so bad for Sugawara though, I can't imagine these stalkers scrutinising every moment of her life, hindering her work, all her friends and everything, I honestly think I would want to just die to get away from all that. As for Souda... Honestly, the way Sasazuka captured Souda in his route still kinda haunts me, and reading a bit more about his past solidifies how uncomfortable I felt having to see Souda experience all he did in Sasazuka's route. I know it's not a healthy way to handle things and his problems, but I think by being able to personally understand how much a game could "save" you, and then having that betray you because of something that isn't your fault and then being hated for it really hurt. Shion and Suzune got a lot of screentime in Shiraishi's route, so yeah nothing much to say that I haven't said tbh.

Something I think I would have really appreciated in Okazaki's route would be seeing more about how Sanjou and the other officers despaired over the physical and mental abuse they suffered at work from their superiors. Sanjou's feelings still got across to me though so I guess it was good enough, but I think it would have nice to delve deeper into how terrible the environment was, and how much hope Sanjou lost because this was the police itself that was destroying them, so where could they even turn? Considering how important Saeki and Mikuni's meeting 10 years ago should have been, and their ideals and everything, it's a bit frustrating to have to see it in this chapter that's not a part of the actual main story. Also, considering how much Mikuni being the prime minister's son was a big deal, and the assassination attempt years ago, you would assume the story would at least talk about the prime minister himself to get a gauge of his image and stuff, but this is also only loosely explored in this criminal chapter lol. But through this, I think I can better understand why Mikuni and Saeki can never really "understand" each other. Which can already be kinda described through their respective lives with Mikuni being strong in the sense that even though he grew up with most things people would wish to have, he chooses to discard all that to fight for a more equal world, whereas Saeki's determination was never something that stemmed from "choice", Saeki's desires seemed to be more fuelled by the pressure of survival in itself, and that's why Mikuni will never be able to understand his desperation, and also how truly personal it is to be fighting for the "weak" who just aren't strong enough to properly fight or do something about their situation, such as his mother. I really liked the CG of all the executors at the end though~

MINI REVIEW Overall, I really did like Collar X Malice. There's a lot of things I felt a bit weird about such as Shiraishi's ending, how boring Ichika became in the second half of Sasazuka's route, lack of exploration into Saeki's character etc, but I still really enjoyed it! I think what I loved most was definitely the individual cases themselves, because exploring police corruption and the unfairness in society by "victims" who felt like they were forced to rely on Adonis to solve their problems and injustice was interesting and emotionally engaging. I empathised with a lot of them and especially liked Akito and Sanjou since something about them really resonated with me, it was probably their sadness tbh. A lot of them lash out in anger towards the "perpetrators" so I think seeing Sanjou and Akito just so "done" with this world and so sad about how they were forced to view themselves, their place in this world and how the world has treated them kinda broke my heart. Honestly, I liked all of them except Hana lol. As for Saeki, I didn't really feel much for him even after getting to know more about his story and relationship with Mikuni. Maybe my opinion might change after I play Collar X Malice: Unlimited since there's apparently an Adonis route lol, but yeah, honestly after all the fleshed out (most of them) "villains" in each route, it's kinda "funny" how shallow Saeki was portrayed imo even though I thought his ideals for helping the "weak" was an interesting idea. Anyway, as for the LIs, this is surprising (and kinda funny) but my favourite was definitely Enomoto. Whenever people mention CxM, it's always about Shiraishi and Sasazuka, so I had no expectations at all for Enomoto but I loved him SO MUCH. Not kidding at all, because every time I read his route, I couldn't stop smiling or laughing because he was so cute, earnest, sincere and funny. He's honestly not even the type I like because Yanagi is my favourite type lmao, but I loved Enomoto to the max. He and Ichika play off each other really well and in a cute way. The funny thing is that usually my favourite type usually has a boring route, but surprisingly I really liked Yanagi's route too! I think exploring Yanagi's weakness, guilt and inability to move forward properly was more interesting than I thought it would be and I really enjoyed how he and Ichika interacted. Honestly, I reallyyyy like Okazaki as an LI but I found his route rather boring until the end lol, and even though Sasazuka was kinda cute and less mean than I thought, I found that the "fire" Ichika had towards others in other routes wasn't present with Sasazuka and it kinda felt like she just followed him around in the second half lol. As for Shiraishi, it's funny how he's so mysterious but has such a "wholesome" route for the most part until the end lol, but yeah anyway, he wasn't my type in terms of looks, personality, story or anything so yeah... Lol. Overall, I would rate the game an 8/10! Enjoyable and probably one of the "better” otome out there with a good story~

#collar x malice

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cinnaminsvga · 3 years

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Question, what is a non fanfic book you'd recommend? Also what is your ultimate favorite fanfic? Emotional comfort go to song? Emotional comfort fic? And if you watch shows/movies (some people don't) what's your go to?

What is a story you wrote that randomly pops up in your mind sometimes? I know authors don't like being asked because they say their works are like their children, but honestly do you have a favorite child? Is there a fic you haven't posted or wrote down that you think about a lot?

Sorry for all the questions. And made it so long... honestly only meant to ask 2 but my brain supplied more questions and I have poor self control when it comes to asking questions

LOL THIS IS SO CUTE and don’t worry about asking all those questions,,, i also have a problem with rambling and i understand your plight,,, plus your questions are cute so i’d be more than happy to answer 🥺

i recently started rereading all the rick riordan books again because i was feeling nostalgic + people on twt were talking about the new disney+ pjo series, and WOW i never realized how much those books shaped me as a kid,,, it really introduced me into one of my oldest hyperfixations (greek myths are my JAM like i used to consistently borrow all the greek myth books at my library as a kid lmao) and i just think it’s a really great series despite being marketed to children

ultimate fanfic is “more than human” by sbj. i’ve spoken about this fic on my blog a couple times already, but it’s seriously SO good. i’ve been following it since 2014 and i still wait yearly for updates lmao,,, sbj is my fanfic idol and they were one of the people who inspired me to post my fics in the first place!!

my comfort song is either “hard times” by paramore or “2!3!” by bangtan depending on what type of comfort i need lol

i have so many comfort fics HDKWJSJA but the two that i consistently go back to are “beta tau sigma” by bazooka and “darling, just say you’ll stay” by yeontansstrongbrows + tusaisbts because i reread them whenever i’m feeling low

i’m actually one of those people who don’t watch shows or movies LMAO i don’t have the attention span for it,,, but i have been keeping up with wandavision (friday can’t come sooner tf) so there’s that!

sometimes i think about “making the most out of a ghost” which is a yoonkook fic i wrote back in like 2018?? and remembering it makes me want to write more yoonkook or other mxm fics... i have so many wips that i wanna write but i’m too lazy to start them... maybe some day 🥲

oh i do have a favorite child HAHAHHA and it’s definitely “the lonely hearts club” like that smau literally changed my life... not only did i gain so many readers while i was writing it, but i also just?? put my entire heart and soul into it unlike any fic i’ve ever written before and it was the fic where i wrote the most vulnerably, if that makes sense lol

I HAVE SO MANY WIPS ITS FUCKING INSANE LMAO but the two wips that have plagued my mind for years are my pirate!yoongi fic and my exchange student!yoongi fic... i actually daydream about those two fics daily but there’s some strange force inside of me that is keeping me from starting it... i think it’s because those two fics are really close to my heart and i’m scared of messing it up and scared of them not gaining any traction despite the effort i’m undoubtedly gonna pour into them??? idk... someday, i’m gonna write them and it’ll almost be like a love letter to myself!!

#thanks for the lovely questions LMAO #i undoubtedly spoke too much but i hope that's okay lol #still sad about my pirate yoongi fic... i want to write her so bad but im afraid ;-;#oh well... the time will come... maybe #Anonymous #answered

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misterbitches · 3 years

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Hello! @flootweed replying to the post from before. the long format was killing me. why does tumblr look like this...

I haven’t watched episode 8 yet...or have I? If it’s the most recent one. No.

Is the hornbill a bird? It probably is but I have a terrible memory and I’m dumb so. I skipped the last few weeks because I’m scawwed. How are you liking it? I did see someone say that the hornbill makes sense (without knowing what it is...at all) bc heart transplant patients only live like 5-15 years after but someone in those comments pointed out that he was so young when he got his and that’s pretty rare so he has a higher likelihood of survival. Frankly, this is the only way I will proceed. Since when did shows ever care about the heart transplant health? Never and it needs to stay that way!

What did we think of ep 6? LMAO. I need opinions! And omg it makes me feel special when I can point things out to people because I so...rarely get to LOL. Editing is like one of my favorite things ever so I can be super particular about it but I try to do the thing you do when you’re supposed to see if it works within its context. I’d like to go in with scissors and glue but alas.

THe mic covering....the rustling....it’s like guys...please. Ironically the audio today wasn’t great. I don’t know why. IDK if you watch c-dramas but I am not even sure what’s worse between them because they dub their dramas. But actually no it’s best to have the dubbing because even tho it is painful they have to put a lot of effort into it. LOL.

Right? @ Aey! It’s just weird if they would show us more about what he’s done instead of saying he’s done sth bad and not even explaining that....like you could even do some shitty exposition. I think if he is to be a true villain then we really need to be privvy. All the warnings make it seem like he’s a fuckin’ serial killer so when we get the scene of him at home it’s like....actually this is really serious? Maybe his pain is like...for a reason. Althought you won’t even TELL US WHAT HE’S DONE WRONG BESIDES BE JUST FUCKING WEIRD AND ANNOYING! So from what we have it’s just a realllllllll fucked up sad person lol. god i forgot about the dinner! and i totally agree. he really needs them to succeed. i like your theory because it would make the scene where he like blocks the twitter user make more sense. he also says they dont really know each other etc so it’s realllllyyyyy probable that he just sees it as a way out. if not then we shall pretend u wrote it :)

god yea i wouldnt say it is art but i also guess we technically have to since it is technically. in the way that technically performance artists are artists but mostly i uh technically ignore them. Also one of my fav BLs is called the best twins. If you do not know what it is I will not elaborate further.t

i want to know more abt poli sci majors lmao but they sound DRAMATIC/ hopefully most ppl in ur cohort arent losers!

hahahha i understand. there was just a thing on twitter about DSA and then the day before about reading discourse. the same thiings. over. and over. and over. and over. we are our own worst enemies but also our own best friends? but i hate tankies and that wont change. but hasan’s a decent guy. he said sth abt black ppl during biden’s primaries in GA or whatever and i was like chill. but he’s insecure and has adhd which means ur more open to being wrong and changing otherwise u will suffocate and die.

and totally about hiding fuck ups. i’ve tried really hard bc of organizing IRL to like...be honest, question, etc but also like...approach it naturally? because if you’re trying to be perfect and so worried you’ll fuck up you don’t realize that puts more stress on you, makes you seem like a robot, and could potentially not make you realize the mistkaes you made. also if we’re privileged in certain spaces there is just no possible way we won’t get something wrong. im light and i know that honestly any way to speak up on colorism is going to be difficult and that’s a space where i have power so i just have to figure it out. we should be uncomfortable because we have to sit with unpleasant feelings and sort through our own whatever. that just makes the next time even better and people can trust u more. i think some people sweat it sooo much or maybe they think their personal life and what theyve been through is more the norm? on the other hand people can be sf reactionary in the worst way and idk what their issue is. there was also a user who said sth very inch arresting about tankies which i thoroughly enjoyed (how like violent lefitsts or tankies / ppl who are like ooh a gun whatever just want to be violent in another space so they have shit tendencies from jump and nothing of substance which i think i agree with tbh fo ra lottttt of ppl. like their anger is actually like “no im about to beat that ass” instead of what we actually want to get done)

sort of in the same vein re: taking it easy...we coudl all be more understanding too. to slow it down like you mentioned about not being privvy to fucking eveyrthing and saying anything on our mind. i saw this person talk about y2k which was a huge deal while happening bc it was the turn of the millenium (bruh were u even alive?) but this twitter user grew up in a super super SUPER religious household and was like why do ppl make jokes about Y2K it was insanely traumatizing? though my first instinct was confused ive tried hard to like look more before i judge especially thanks to a friend of mine. turns out that with the further reading the more we found out he was just really traumatized; it was very common in religious households to be afraid of 2000. so we could have come at him with no understanding and he could have thought that everyone had the same experience with that year that he did. his feelings sit precedent though but i think it was just very hard for him to fathom.

i didnt reply bc he didnt need that and what could i have said? he’ll see what the truth is with exposure and unfortunately this was something he really did go through.

and that’s what makes most people think others could be over the top. because it sounded ridiculous but then it was this huge traumatic thing that we could have never known about. so maybe when someone sounds like actually crazy they have an explanation? of course some ppl are just batshit or annoying but that’s anywhere not just leftists it’ just means more i guess when a ~~librul is annoyed~ but it can be easy to want to make fun of ppl too. lmao. basically what i am saying is the internet? especially twitter? for leftists? in this economy? bitch it’s the wild west out here.

i am 29! idk if i said it or not. i am OLD u probably werent even born in the year i was talking about wah. i know not old-old or old at all but compared to you i’m due for a colonoscopy.

omg i hope u can get vaxxed soon! are you wfh rn? i hope ur also not in a bad state as in state state not state as in ur being :| bleh what a fucking time. it sucks that you have to fucking do work. well unless u like school. which i hope u do. i just assume everyone hates it cos i did lmao

was it the lindsay ellis drama? that bitch is dumb. if there was other drama oh wait the drama i was referring to it all happened on the same day. idk book twitter that well but i saw something from someone who was abt that shit and wowie! the american people are not that.....intelligent to put it lightly.

i’ll get better. ppl tell me they miss me and im like aw. i have insanellllyyy bad insomnia and a lot of stuff happened this year HOWEVER I SLEPT FOR TWO DAYS FOR 8 HOURS AT A REASONABLE TIME. im a new woman. anyways you too! i hope ur not too burnt out with school. we just dont know when the burnout is or we just dont know we are burnt out until we are. the panaramiciccici hit and all the things i was ignoring kind of just fell on me and sooo much happened at once. and frankly it’s hard to take care of ourselves. lord.

Like if you aren’t interested in expanding on the issue in a way that hasn’t been done before all you gotta do it like… spread resources and donate if you can. I dont see the point in having to say something about every issue especially if you (not at you specifically just in general) aren’t immediately impacted by the issue. Like is the 14 yr old white marxist named sarah on twitter really gonna have meaningful insight on anti-asian violence ?

this is part of why i cannot telecommunicate. i dont want to do shit on the internet. i am able bodied so i know that this time has been of such ease for other people. but mentally i just can’t. i don’t have a comment on hand like that and i hvae no desire to engage with ppl that way. i am a super super super solitary person but thats bc it’s MY time so when it’s like all this effort with other people i dont ever want to be alone. it’s the same with the way i approach filmmaking. it isnt a sole thing so i hate it not together. that’s part of how u can get so sucked in and repeat doom scrolling. i was in this webinar last may after [redacted] and this black woman prof said “read with a community and talk” because otherwise she said we are torturing ourselves. you can’t carry that weight all on your own. unfortunately i hate zoom, discord, slack, signal, whatsapp, facetime. you name it this panera has made it evi.. L

you make a really excellent point. i think the young young gen zers are really really just interesting because it’s like this whole new world for them with leftist politics and they just can’t grasp the horrors of the world and the kind of freedom being a leftist can bring. and so many people don’t grow out of it. those people so happen to be the “least productive” in terms of how much time they spend IRL withe these issues. naturally, younger kids are gonna have a harder time. they are not as mobile as well so the internet becomes this place. but then it’s this echo chamber. and many times just things posted without sources. and social media NEEDS that to exist.

i think of the irony of leftist kids on tik tok and while i am happy it’s reaching them it’s just....different. very different. the growth of social media is so good but also so fucking sad, it’s too much! i think the point about not writing everything is major. even i have to do this which is part of the disappearing.y ou need to detach and make sure your head is on straight again. but when you think eveyrone has to be privvy to every thought and you can’t just sit back....which twitter and social media doesn’t encourage. you have to join in. that’s often why when i have something to say it is dense because i don’t feel like repeating it. ever. lmao ust ever. i cant pay attn. social media is a fucking minefield for my brain u can get so lost in it and absorb it but once u start talking you may not be able to stop.

i think a big part of that is it not being a leisurely thing but sort of just in our lives always. this sounds like a grandpa rant but ykwim. We dont have to see the same thing over and over again. And eventually it gets sincerely diluted or its diluted bc of capitalism or whatever. Or if theyre very young or maybe they don’t have like the greatest way of sharing the knowledge? then it can be butchered. I hope this is making sense...i’m talking beyoond the boring surface-level milquetoast shit. i see really ahistorical stuff on there from leftists (like this thing about NK + africa and it being a beneficial rship as opposed to a um not beneficial one. and it isn’t. beneficial but this young black girl was talking abt it and noname rtd and i was like it’s just too complex. there’s no good/bad here just bc it’s not america. dont get me started on this.)

but Lol that was kinda off topic but I think what I meant in my last reply about not turning off the voice in my head is about when I consume media, not necessarily when I’m online talking about. Even if I have criticism for something, I’m usually pretty chill when consuming fandom content bc I think being serious online all the time is kinda boring. Like sometimes I’m analyzing theme and shit but really most of the time im memeing.

exactly.........gotta laugh. thats why sometimes im like i cant think lmao. unfrotunately i have been ARGUING with ppl on the internet for rly no reason when i could have replied to ur very nice fun wholesome message. i love torture. i miss memes.

“ i think the people who get the least enjoyment out of that are those so obsessed with getting upset with anyone thinking outside of their lines as if it equates to them “ EXACTLYYYYY

kekekekeke im glad u got it. it’s like with conservatives throwing around snowflake. now im beginning to question who the real complainers are.

LMAO exactlyyyy. i posted a screenshot of this writer from twitter saying that exact thing. Like first of all, I’m...an adult? and if you are as well uh? i’m sorry for you but are we 12? But how is it affecting u this viscerally? And if it does why dont u...do...research? pihgofuaipoajghou but honestly everything u said. we’re trained to go into it with nothing. i was only around ur age when i started to get more serious about this stuff but you’re like lightyears ahead of where i was at 21. did i say this but i’m in iww and literally i can tell u in 2016 i did not think 2019 me would be in a union bc i told my friend in a train station that we don’t need unions. i was 23...but the thing is i didnt know what i was talking about. at all. and i knew i didnt know and she knew i didnt know and now i am the clown.

also yes at critical engagement. i had to learn so much through experience and this is tuff that i coudlnt be shielded from. there’s an empathy you kinda have to develop and this understanding that you move through the world as this person who is “nowhere and everywhere; nothing and everything” so i’ve always had to think about things differently just to survive. that’s also what can drag a lot of people towards it like theres so many black kpop fans bc i think a lot of the pain in SK can be mirrored (sort of) through our history. and theres currently a history now but it had to be forged. uh what was my point oh yea however i wouldnt have been able to move further if i didnt have my background to go off of bc i knew something was off when i started getting into all these things (ill give u a hint) but if i had no prior knowledge and didnt have to think about it then the critical approach is either stale or stupid.

i had to research but i dont understand how ppl are so bold with little to no research and understanding? thhey just inherently know with also like ZERO experience in what they need experience in. engaging critically means “how i see the world” with dashes of trying to be open adn understanding or whatever. actually that’s another thing like being afraid of criticizing things bc theyre foreign to you so u give it a pass (like we discussed) but it doesnt hAVE TO BEEEE JUST REAAAAAD and then take all the info ur teensy brain and apply it. be a normal human being and dont be fucking rude and racist. thats it! u can complain abt literally anything without being a dick.

as we start with LW and end with LW.....what do we think (i asked this already) omg please share wbl thoughts i THINK i know what ur talking about. well it could be two things; their rship when they came back and the physicality and then pei shou yi. i almost dont even want to use my brain to fucking look at that. i think wbl can get away with more bc of visual~*~*~* reasons (like literally, the look of the show. there’s more space to get lost in the frames. many thai dramas are a lot more literal? this isn’t the right word but it’s very heavily character focused particularly bc of $ i think) though good production also underscores flaws so i am also wrong. but like do u know what i mean? u have to kinda focus on it? or maybe it’s just cos like.....ur so used to it in thai bl idek. i’ve seen tw bl ofc.

look i swear i will justify this forever bc there are some things we miss right but if u feel like someone’s a bad actor....theyre bad. it’s about tone movement etc etc etc and since most thai bl productions have 0 interest in that....well. they take these newbies and put them in these situations. we dont understand thai but if we see them and we’re like “wow this is really bad” then they’re bad lmao. IDC i will never be like cos idk what theyre saying NO WHY HE LOOK LIKE A ROBOT???????? DOES HE EMOTE? why is he CRYING WITH NO TEARS? and it’s not even a total requisite to cry with tears(i mean for me it is) but it’s just like what is happening on ur face right now young man????????

painful.

the inflection stuff is very valid ooh good point tho but that’s only a part of the piece. plus we get used to the way they communicate. like the ppl from sotus were prtty bad. i dont like that show but thats an ex of ppl liing the actors and the person i thought was better other ppl dont think that? well apparently hes a shitty guy but. um. so when theres decent acting its so glaring.

although i must say even tho i dont care for 2gether anymore and would never like to be reminded about its existence (only bc i just cringe lol) i honestly....didnt think bright was a bad actor? but people keep saying he is and i am much more inclined to believe them than myself. though i am not often dickmatized that could have been it. until he opened his mouth and ruined it and then i stopped paying attn.

although honestly i’m so much more critical than i could be positive. i have ben stumped for the last day about how i wasnt mad at his acting in the show. is it me? is it him? who’s......the wrong one.....(me)

oh shit they have been denied? i haven’t been paying attn to whats been going on recently. i just got into it on MDL because of snowdrop. sometimes i literally cannot engage bc ill just be like alright well im black so this power button in my head is going off when ppl talk abt that shit. back in the day when kpop jawns were saying some real outta pocket anti black shit (now everyone is slick with it) it’d always be THEY DONT HAVE GOOGLE THEYVE NEVER SEEN A BLACK PERSON but really it’s like no...maybe they are just racist? that’s ok too.

also the past 2 weeks have been um atrocious bc how fucking easily people fell into the pit of white supremacy and started to turn their ire towards black people and making a competition between our groups just like they wanted. it’s not about the women who are dead anymore, who were sex workers, their womanhood, being asian, being poor anymore. it’s about how much black people get attention and why people only pay attn to us. i am not feeling very generous this week for ppl to excuse that hsit.

on a lighter note, ppl say that abt the whole husband and wife thing. i dont know how to explain how angry that shit makes me but maybe it’s because i do not want to think of my body in relation to a fucking penis at all hours of the day. if bls could kindly not do that it would be nice lmao

yes there are a lot of those. who are only there to gawk lmao. and just idk worship bc of the cult of personality thing bc of how weird and open they have to be as actors. some of the others are people who /think/ theyre really smart (i think im asmart but i also think i am very dumb and i have adhd to prove that MEDICALLY!!!) but are actually not? or their observations arent great? or idk if they are they arent interesting? but i think well..........we have more refined palettes :P

jk also theres just different personalities. you and i mesh more bc we have a lot of the same beliefs and are coming from the same place. that makes it easier to understand as well. i really try to remember that but some people are really weird so. again just...the perception of certain things even down to acting skills. but i also dont like.......believe this genre can really do anything at all. on one hand i want them to do it right bc it’s a piece of work so they should. be proud of it. cos most things arent advancing us bc representation and culturalism are a lie bla bla. it’s just that when the depictions are negative or not done well it adds to the problem as opposed to the things that are well done are fairly benign and can’t really pull us back (perf example is the black panther film. i woudl definitely not say it was transgressive as a literal work but visually it’s just stunning. and it’s sad that it’s stunning and surprising but still with basically an all black cast of mostly dark people abd like what it means in the zeitgeist yes. it’s also just a good movie. but it’s still imperialist prop and unfortunately and this is fucking pathetic to say it “opened eyes” in other countries where they hate black ppl and ignore their own racialized minorities HENNYWAYSSSS a better ex is moonlight except moonlight isnt mainstream and is indie tho...still thru a funnel of capital bc a24 but who cares bleed the fuckers dry is my motto. my point is moonlight is both a great work and doesnt bring any failures to the table and its existence helps in ways outside of art but they arent the defining things giving us material advancement sooooo i mean it’s complex (this is my conclusion to everything um guys it’s complex)

er i had one more point in conjunction to above. oh yea so i like dont need all these extra things to make it progressive. like people really want more women in the show and i am honestly like i really dont. i dont want them to actively do this. if they cant do it naturally then let someone else do it. i am not asking for more bc i dont want it from them. when something comes along i embrace it but i do not see why women should be represented when the genre RELIES on patriarchy. there is no complete satisfying existence for the women in these series. i dont want it. i dont ask people to show us~*~* or respect~* like fuck no the people who make it make it and hopefully more will make it in the future but i will not beg bc THEY DONT WANT TO DO IT SO WOULD FORCING IT MAKE IT BETTER? just fucking leave them out entirely. that’s the answer if theyre gonna make nasty female characters then those bitches can geaux. we have other plcaes to be. booked. and. BUSY!

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sucuretcannelle · 3 years

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Could I have a matchup for any Danganronpa game? I'm a 5'5 chubby female, with longish red hair, brown eyes, and freckles. Also an ✨Aquarius✨ and prefer dudes. I'm super awkward, and not the best when it comes to romance. With certain friends I like hugs and stuff, but with other friends I'm not. Since this is a romantic matchup, I'm going to assume I'd be close and comfy with them hugging me and stuff. So yeah, I'm affectionate with people I'm comfortable with, and, for example, if it's cold I'll just start pressing up against them.

I'm shy when it comes to meeting people, but chill with friends and immediate family.

May or may not be a pervert hehe

Love dark humor 🤭

I have a short temper, and actually am on medication, so that's chill I guess

I'm super insecure about everything, which has led to me kinda being a bully in my head, and sorta out loud when it comes to my immediate family. I feel bad, but it's a habit that I hope I can break.

I can be obsessive about my interests so yeah

Oh I'm also lazy and a bad procrastinator 🙃

I love animals, and have 3 dogs and 3 cats who I would actually die for. Though I do have a tendency to be a pretty lazy owner, which I feel bad for, and am going to attempt to get over. And be a, y'know, good owner.

I'm really bad at describing myself, so yeah that exists I guess hahahha

Um, I'm also really bad at waiting my turn(primarily when it comes to talking) cuz I'm kinda impatient.

And I'm really bad about only talking about myself when it comes to conversations. Trying to get batter, and I think I have a little bit.

Ooh, I also like singing and writing, though I'm not very good. I'm pretty proud of me art skills though :)

I also like oversized hoodies, leggings, and slide on shoes :3

Sorry if this is ass, it’s almost 2 a.m lmao

My top THH picks for you are Yasuhiro and Chihiro!

Yasuhiro has learned to let you speak first, though it was annoying at first. But if he needs to speak, he's gonna speak, sorry. If you're too lazy to do something, he'll try to help if he can! Uhhh, he's over 18 I'm pretty sure, so take that as you will lmao. He's really clingy. He doesn't care if he's just holding hands with you or cuddling you, he just wants to be near you. He does try his best not to annoy you or make you lash out or anything, you do scare him sometimes though tbh. If you get cold he gives you his jacket and holds onto you for dear life cuz he's prolly colder than you (he's also a human heater, you can't get too cold around him tbh). When you feel insecure, he tries to help, he's just not really good with his words, but its the thought that counts.

Please help this timid boy. His personality sorta balances out yours, in a sense that his vibe keeps *you* in check, so there isn't much to worry ab. He *always* lets you speak first, he probably even prefers it. Affection in your relationship is so weird, if you don't start it, theres a 70% chance he doesn't do anything. He probably doesn't understand dark humor that much-. He really does try to help with your procrastination as long as you're willing to put effort in. He gets so flustered when you hug him too. Oh and, please sing to him if you can. He doesn’t care if its good or bad, he just wants to hear your voice ajsdna

I don't have a top SDR2 pick for you, which is normal cuz I typically don't-

My top V3 pick for you is Rantaro!

(Ignore the uglyass raisin in front of the gif)

He's sort of a pushover when it comes to you. He knows you're trying to get better with your temper so he just doesn't mention it a lot, so he just y'know, stay quiet. He picks up the habit of letting you speak first to avoid conflict, and it doesn't really annoy him. He also doesn't mention you procrastination till it becomes a real problem. This mf is s m o o t h. So smooth that it takes you hours to process some of the things he says. But anyway, he gives the best hugs. They're so loving and reassuring, so yeah. He likes how passionate you are ab your interests btw.

#dangan #danganronpa #danganronpa matchup #danganronpa matchups #matchup #matchups #rantaro amami #chihiro #yasuhiro hagakure #thh #danganronpa v3 #sdr2

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itsjusta · 3 years

Text

TAAS2 NI DOEEE HEHEHE READ EVERYTHING HUUUH!!

Feb 15 (Mon)

i got so busy in da hapon doe 🥺 i cleaned da cr huhu im so kapoyyy and then i felt a little kulbaan doeee cos nag huna2 ko sako sched sa mon-wed dis week issa so busy doeee :((( i have to do pa today one assignment and then practice for our prelims then finalize half of my midterms theeeen study for ur philo HAHAHAHAH aissshhh i also feel very kahilakon doeee idk and my arms kay murag ga kurog2 doe :(( aish im too busy for these feelings!!!!

4:15 pm —— i was doing my assignment but idkkkk my heart is beating fast jd doeee and my arms feel numb and ga kurog2 and i have this kulbaan feeling :((( UGH issa need to take a break :(( also wanna cry but i cant cry doeee but i eventually cried na dayon doeee

i also didnt continue to work nalang doeee issa i dont feel well physically and emotionally hahahha 😟 im back to working doe and i cried a looootttt cos im writing about love HAHAHAH

but the practice was cancelled sooo i started na my surprise for u para mas less2 ako i do ugmaaa i started na the peanut butter bars unta lang di ma epic fail uyyy or basin di diay ta mag kita sa wed hilak ko!!!!

Feb 16 (Tues)

issa wake up ko so early kay gi wake up ko sako groupmates and aishhhh so busy na dayon mi prac and do sa amo midterms!!!! 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ and i’m so sleepy na gyd doeee huhu

so kapoy ni nga day doe cos whole day atubang sa screen issa maka drain doe and maka labad sa head issa wa gyd ko na do nga acads kay mag utro pami reshoot so sayang effort but sge nalang doeee huhuhu alsooo excited for my surprise tooom hope u like it :((((

Feb 17 (Wed)

Woke up at 7:30!!! so early so sayo pd ko nag cook for your giftsss and for our lunch hehehe im always excited to cook for u doe and give u gifts 🥺🥺🥺 and aishhh im really happy doe that u still laag hereee issa when i’m with u i feel safe gyd doe 🥺🥺🥺 u give me so much comfort gyd doe thank u sooo much 🥺🥺 even though u dont say it, i know u care a lot for me gyd doeee (or maybe assuming lang ko hahahah) but aishhh thank u for keeping me in your life :((

i’m sorry i cried a lot doeee huhu idk also but aishhh its hard for me to let go of you gyd doeee and moments like this issa makes me realize na i still have so much love for u gyd doe :((( issa both tears of joy and sadness man to kanina!! hahahha im happy na u still make time for me doeee and im happy gyd that i get to be with youuu but also sad cos aishhh issa i know everything is so hard gyd doe and usahay ra au ta makauban huhu what i said was true doeee that i will endure everything basta its for ur happiness!! hehhe u know i’ve endured sooo much the past months but i never got angry with u gyd doeee cos i know u were happy man with your decisions!!! heheh i can never hold bad feelings for u gyd doeee my heart is just full of gratitude and love for u!!!! i just want u to be happy saimo life doeee career, acads, family life, with friends, and saimo gf doeee heheh even though its so sakit for me but i just want gyd na mahappy ka heheh and aishhh im happy gyd doe nga part pako saimo lifeee 🥺🥺 im happy that u talk to me pa doeee and that i still get to be with youuu heheh makes me happy that you’re there for me whenever i have chikaaa!!!! thankkkkk youuu eriiiiccc!!!!! ❤️❤️❤️

and giving gifts is one way i can show how much i appreciate you doeee :((( and thank youuuu for making me feel cared for and special :((( issa u always make me feel lyk dat gyd doeee with ur hugs and kisses thank u :(((( and aish i get so soft for u gyd doe esp when u cry huhuhu dont cry na ok!!!! i’m happy this way man heheh i’m happy doe that u still let me show my love for u and im happy and grateful that u keep me in ur life doe 🥺 i just always hope and pray that my heart can endure watching u love another doe just until i can move on hehe and i think my heart is getting stronger naman doe but aish there are just times gyd that i cannot kaya it heheh but das okay ryttt!! thank youuu kaayo for coming here doeee thank u for giving me your time and for the effort!!! i appreciate it so much doe cos i know its hard gyd to come visit me with your situation now but u still make time for me gyddd thank youuuuu 😭😭😭❤️❤️

anddd how r u doe??? maulaw ko ask in person doe idk why :((( i hope you’re okay lang also haaaa maybe hurting napd ka there :((( i want u to be genuinely happy doeee and i will also get there soon!! apas rako!!! ❤️

Feb 18 (Thurs)

started my day early cosss we had to shoot sa gmeet doeee heheh its a nice day doe idk why!! the weather is nice heheh also i chika to u about khalid doeee hahaha shhh lang ok!!! 🤣 issa i got scared doe i just inbox zone him HAHAHHAHA di jd ko ga entertain ug mga laki doeee cos i dont have gana gyd to talk to others doe!! issa just want to be single lang gyd doeee cos di pako ready also wa pa gani ko ka move on!!! hahahahha

dis day was nice and chill lang doeee i did ur finman hehhe and had an exam dayooon and watched kdrama with mom!! pa tatt nako toooom OMGGG are u excited for me too?!!

Feb. 19 (Fri)

got my first tatt ommgggg it was sakit doeee but kaya lang!!! heheh i was also so excited to chika gyd to u doeee but i know galaag ka busa i have to wait doeee :((( aish issa ka cry dayon ko cos why am i so excited to talk to someone na naay lain priority :((( HMP KALUOY BA AYA!! HAHHAHA but aishhh issa i prefer lang like dis doe kesa i will pugos myself to entertain and talk to others issa cannot gyd doe cos i really dont have the gana hehhe just letting myself cry and maoy now doeee it’s just times like these when i realize how painful this situation is doe

also read this quote on ig dayon nga “I suppose I’ll just keep loving you, until one day it ends.” 🥺🥺 aish made me cry again cos i think this is what i’m gonna do gyd doeee and i hope u just let me love you until then doeeee 🥺 be happy and inlove with another doeee i’ll just be by your side loving you hehe and thank u for letting me love you and be in ur life!!! i dont think my love for u will end doe but u know what i mean hehe thank u cos u not shutting me out or pushing me away hehehe issa i’m sorry i always sorry doeee its just dat i feel like i’m putting u in a bad place :(( but ahhh i appreciate you so much doe and everything u do for me!! :((( thank u also for being so supportive and appreciative for meee aishhhh thank u for making me feel special 😭

Feb 20 (Sat)

happy marriage anniv to ur parents doeee!!! hehehe

woke up at 9:30 then cooked carbonara hehe gitiwas nalang nako pasta smol nalang maaan tired ko uy hehe issa rest day also today from acads doeee issa uban man ko there ila ate sweet and issa tambay2 lang ko there doeee tas pag uli so tayurd ko ka nap ko sa byahe and sa house kadjot hehe then at night watch lang ko kdrama sa room ni mom hehehe issa i like having no acads to do!!

Feb 21 (Sun)

soooo tugnaaaaw cos there’s a bagyo i woke up at 10 na!!! issa grabe ako kurog2 uy heheheh ion like dis weather issa so colddd dili ko ka lihok2 ug ayo cos tugnaw!!

issa also cried today cos aish i remembered our memories doeee and how we were so clingy with each other esp me 🥺🥺 issa like di jd ta agwanta not mag kita dugay doe and di pd ta sumhan sa each other hahahaha we were sumpay tinae gyd!!! aishh idk dali ra gyd kyko maka cry basta maka think ko about you or about sato past doeee issa aish cannot contain gyd emotions :((( and even if now i dont get the same effort from u doe its okaaay becos i chose this man pddd i chose to be in your life gihapon hhehe and aishhh lets just sulit dis doeee i want to sulit pd nga maka talk pako saimoha cos maybe a year from now dili na doeee!! maybe pila ka months imo nako i shoo shoo saimo life!!!! hhahahah but thank u doeee cos i know u want to keep me in ur life gihapon bahala lisod 🥺🥺 thank u im touched huh!!!

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tazanna-blythe · 5 years

Text

Done

Chapter 2

Chloe's room at the hotel:

"Sooo your plan is simple but scary and a lot of work not to mention you need a lot of money...….. I'm in!!!!!!"

" hahahahaha your the only person i know that love's this kind of sh*t"

" Who wouldn't and you know that i love big reveals especially Liela hahahaha I would pay big money to see her reaction after this hahaha"

"Dont worry I'll have the footage *smile evilly*"

"Oohhhh *smile's evilly* goody, well all of this is well and good but how can you ask ladybug to cooperate with us besides can you even contact her? And as I can recall ladybug also has a big part of this?"

"Oh she'll agree to it "

*Rises her eyebrow*" and how?? Oh great one?"

" easy, because will help her find hawkmoth!"

"WHAT!? Are you crazy?"

"Almost hahahahaha"

"Wait hold up i thought that this is just revenged on that lying bitch so why do WE have to find hawkmoths lair. Us? 2 teenagers ? With no super powers well I'm the queen bee but MARINETTE we're gonna get killed!"

" don't you want yo get this hawkmoth thing over with?"

"Yes of course but …"

"Where not really gonna fight hawkmoth will just find him that's all"

"But why ?!!can't we just go for liela and let ladybug have hawkmoth?"

"Chloe think about it! She's Volpina twice and Chameleon and all of those happened only seconds after she gets mad seconds! Normal people at least takes 2 minutes or more to get akumatized and for the fact that thanks to your daddy being paranoid about your safety, she forgot that their are newly installed cctv cameras in our school and got caught in the action accepting the akuma without hesitating, she even caught the akuma in her hands and put it in her necklace on.her.own!!"

*silence*

"She accepted the? akuma"

"Yes"

"She caught it? With her bare hands?"

"Yes!"

"She's helping hawkmoth?"

"Yes"

"So if we reveal her without hawkmoth defeated, she'll come after us?"

"1000000% Yes"

"She' a terrorist?"

"Yes"

"Let's kill her!"

"As much as I want to but no."

"Oh come on your going back to your goody goody state again !!"

" Chloe if we kill her will she pay all the things she did to me??"

"No..."

"I want her to suffer the way i suffered , I want to see her crumble and most of all i want her to experience that feeling of being truly alone and helpless"

"Ok so how do we start?"

"Will do nothing"

"What? Can you explain please"

"Will do nothing to her, we are not gonna expose her we will let her tell her tale then we record it every single lie she says"

"Ok how?"

" You and Sabrina of course"

"Ok how?"

"Do you see this "holds her hair ties " this has hidden cameras on it it been recording everything since this morning" *smirking*

"Oohhh I see so I would wear a camera on me to school to get evidence, got it but how are we gonna get Sabrina to ware one?"

" Sabrina love fancy cute things just buy her a new broch and put a camera to it but hers would be connected to our computer wirelessly so we don't have to take it away from her and tell her it REALLY expensive so she won't take it of"

"Got it , gather evidence then what?"

"I'll work for your mother to get money and help me in my career but ill go as MDC so Liela doesn't know and destroy my future"

"Ok so how long are we gonna get evidence?"

"Just for a week Chloe that's all and do you know someone who is good at making a short movie??"

"Yes why?

" well we need someone to edit our evidence beautify of course if not how are we gonna let our future children watch this?"

"I can do that, i'll order the broch with special features now and you go and talk to my mother she's home by this time"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Soo Marinette what are you doing here?"

"Chloe told me that you have a business proposition for me?"

" ahhhh! So Chloe told you .. let's make this fast , i want you to be our new designer in my company in America, ill make your brand the most expensive and famous there is. So what do you say?"

" I want a house waiting for me in America and a full scholarship in one of the best schools there"

"Well that very easy, any more request?"

"I want to be called MDC for a while until I go to America"

"Sure and when will you go to America?"

"When this school year ends it's only 2 months left and i want to prepare my gifts to my classmates"

"Sure, all you have to do is sign the contract tomorrow and ill also give you your first project tomorrow so . Go!!! And tell your parents go come here tomorrow too id like to talk to them"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"That went well Mari!"

" Yes it did Tikki and Tikki?"

"Yes Marinette?"

"An akuma butterfly can be caught by a camera right?"

"Yes it can"

“How much energy well take for you to make a ladybug robot with camera on it the same with my hair ties?"

"1 robot ladybug? Easy i can make 10 ezpz"

"Um tikki I need 100 of them"

"Well I need a lot of sweets then!!"

"Well I live in a bakery so no problem"

"Marinette? Can't we just look at the cctv cameras in the city ?"

"No Tikki the cctvs are only covering the streets of parish and we can't go it in every homes to scout that will take a lot of the and effort and lawsuits even if they know it's ladybug"

"Oh ok ,let's go back to Chloe lets see what she's doing?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"So how it go?"

"Your mom said that ill take my parents here tomorrow for the signing of contract and talk to them"

"Ohhhh and I already ordered my new trinkets and the techie guy is coming tomorrow to discuss our "movie" hahahaha I'm already can see it now it's going to be epic hahahha!!!"

"Um Chloe wont your dad get suspicious about hiring that guy? I mean it not gonna be cheap you know?"

"Of course he doesn't mind I'm just gonna say that this is a secret farewell movie we are planning for our classmates and it'll be fine"

"As you say so and Chloe no one must now this ok please … and remember act natural tomorrow and no exposing liela ok"

"Ok got it!"

"Ok bye chloe see you tomorrow"

"Bye!!!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Home/bakery:

Sabine was getting worried this past few months her daughter is getting more and more depressed by the day and hardly even wants to go to school again. She was scared that maybe someone's hurting her baby. And she also notices that she's not hanging out with her friends like she used to.

For example today she saw her friends all huddled up in the park and her being a supportive mother she quickly packed a basket full of goodies blankets and juice to give to them ,but as she was approaching them she heard all of the nasty things they have to say about her daughter which was not true and very hurtful not only to her but also to her baby.

And after she calmed herself she notice that marinette wasn't with them and she realized that something was very wrong and quickly connect the dots that her sweet baby was being bullied and these are not her friends and she will get to the bottom of this.

After that she left and told her husband everything of course he won't believe her at first but as she explain everything regarding about their daughter's past behavior her solemn and tired face he believed her and wants to get to the bottom of this so both of them quickly cleaned up the store and closed it and waited for Marinette two come home.

She notice Marinette coming home today was how her daughter normally acts happy, cheery and full of life but now she realized that it was fake and forced. Now she was more determine to know the truth.

"Marinette how's school today?"

"It was fine Mamma "

"Marinette before you go to your room we need to talk"

"Talk about what?"

"First of all how was school REALLY ? This time the truth dear" tom said firmly telling Marinette not to lie.

Marinette was startled she didn't know what they where pointing at? Did Liela said another lie about her again? ,did her parents believed her? Did her so called friends told her parents that she was bullying someone?.

As Marinette was having an internal turmoil her mother now confirms it and demands an explanation now or else she's really going to explode and an angry mama is not good especially mama protecting her baby that knows how to fight adding an akuma equals bloodbath and no one can stop her not even her husband.

So now Marinette doesn't have a choice and told them everything that's happening to her well except the ladybug part and well the expression on her parents was both furious and sad.

Now there was silence for a while and both Sabine and tom are calming themselves so that they won't be akumatized.

Sabine couldn't hold herself she pulled Marinette into her arms and hugged her as tight as she can silently comforting both of them.

Marinette couldn't take it anymore she burst into tears and let it all out. all of those months of frustrations and emotions are now released and she no longer can't hold it .in the end it all results into a big family hug which Marinette so desperately needs.

While all of this is happening nobody noticed a flock off akuma butterfly flying rapidly to the house which all of them flying straight to a force field that quickly purifies which leads to a very very very mad hawkmoth.

"Can somebody tell me what is happening"

"I don't know sir"

"I can sense it a very strong negative energies but why can't I akumatized them!"

"I don't know sir maybe i can help. Dusu spread my feathers"

*Mayura's transformation sequence*

"Fly away my beautiful amok go and enhance and hone that frustration" with that said she plucked a feather from fan and release it. Before it even past the school Nathalie suddenly felt a sharp and overwhelming pain in her chest letting her transformation go and collapsing

"NATHALIE " hawkmoth screamed at caught her before she hits the floor.

"This is enough for today Noro dark wings off" hawk moths transformation is of and now revealing Gabriel in his place.

"Noro what was happening ,why didn't my akuma worked?"

"Master I think someone's blocking you both I don't know who?"

"Well as a said its enough for today" with that Gabriel carried Nathalie out of the lair and into the living room sofa.

With the Dupain- Cheng family

After comforting and calming themselves they head for there rooms with the light heart.

"Marinette how do you feel" tikki ask tiredly and softly

" I'm fine now thank you. I feel as if a large elephant lifted off my shoulders and for the fact that the eyes stings and its bloody red but overall I'm really fine and happy"

" I'm glad you really needed it"

" I know now I think I can rest easy cause it's not my turn to patrol tonight, well at least until chat noir has another hissy fits and come here instead of doing his job"

"Well Marinette until then let's have some rest " Tikki yawns as soon as she said that

"Mmmmmm i wonder why none in my family got akumatized since we were very emotional just now?" Marinette said and looked at tikki with a thankful look

"You needed it Marinette and i love you and most of all your human you need to released it or else you'll go crazy" tikki smiled at her lovingly

"Ok thanks again … come here tikki we need to rest tomorrow gonna be a busy day" with that tikki flew to Marinette's and slept.

An hour later a shadow figure appeared on Marinette's window and knocked on it furiously for 20 minutes, knocking some glass after window and after some thinking the person just destroyed the window saying cataclysm then he walked in and was disappointed.

When he walked in he saw Marinette's back and sleeping soundly and after some internal debating with himself he left and went straight home and he completely forgot about patrolling and the broken window.

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Who ever wants to be tag just tell me 😘😘😘

#ml salt #ml au #marinette's plans are getting started #marinette and chloe best friends #marinette deserves better #marinette dupen chang #evil plans #marinette and chloe bestfriends #MDC #emotional chapter #chloe's redemption #miraclous ladybug #miraculous fanfic #miraculous au #maribat #marinette x damian #maribat's coming #Done chapter 2

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rqs902 · 4 years

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yang chaowen is really a sensitive kid... man he brings out renyu's song's feels and then brings up ylq to relate to the lyrics bc he knows his friend isnt getting as much appreciation as himself. (this makes even more sense after ylq said he had been crying before ycw went onstage and ycw was comforting him... and then after ycw came off the stage, it was time for ylq to comfort him from crying TT) Their friendship is really something. But then ycw saying he just gets ripped for getting screentime for crying all the time ouch but i dont get the feeling that hes doing it for attention but maybe im becoming partly biased towards chaowen :)

Lol the fact that they focus so much on xzx and how hes favored by gjm but feels like it's unfair to be treated uncomfortably by other trainees as a result... all i can say is, what do u expect, of course the other kids will be salty, their lives are on the line and theyre getting nothing close to the attention you are, so unfortunately u cant win everything :(

Lol I see why everyone on twitter is annoyed at gjm... Jackson is literally trying to say something meaningful and mentor-like to su er and gjm literally interrupts with his own opinion.... jackson is like unable to finish his thought. and then when Cheng xiao is actually trying to give ma haowen advice, gjm just goes WELL I DISAGREE, THIS IS RENYU'S FAULT and everyone's like wtffffff???? And then he starts saying people can help Xinhai with his terrible dance (ouch) but renyu didnt help haowen sing and Huang enyu MY CHILD just goes: but dancing and singing are different....... and I'm just smh.... gjm really shouldnt act like he knows everything when hes the only mentor with zero actual relevant experience :( Poor renyu literally looks like hes about to burst into tears, ma haowen looks so sorry and appalled renyu's getting yelled at and none of the other mentors seem to agree with gjm lol

lets appreciate renyu’s song, its really good!!!

Lol this whole mentor segment is a mess but man chaowen and renyu won a lotta votesss ayyy

I think xue en seeing hwh as a pro rapper shows him humbling himself, since hes technically a more seasoned and popular idol performer

Cheng xiao fangirling over xue en I mean SAME hahahahahahaha awwwwww yzx being soooo genuinely happy for xue en is the cutest!!! Aw cto friendship and xue en crying :’) actually one thing ive noticed i feel like yzx seems like a genuinely kind and cheerful friend, maybe people are bashing him bc he pushed off some leaderly responsibilities to lin mo in the last round but maybe hes just not someone to take on a strict leader role (looks at aj from afo...) and realized that since lin mo has such experience and is really good at it, it makes sense to respect his experience and skill and let him take on that role. of course its unfortunate that means lin mo worked extra for less recognition, but i think it seems like yzx really respected and admired him so im hopeful what happened wasnt due to mean intentions

watching chen junhao feeling lost oh man :/ maybe he hadnt fully prepared himself for the idol life when first coming on this show. its unfortunate reality that in this kind of idol survival show, the focus is more on stage presence and face and performance, rather than the music itself. Hopefully he really feels that hes found a path forward through this performance. This is a really real way to present him but I'm sad theres not as much focus on li chenxu when this is hissss song

Man both the self composed songs are really good!! Mann them making this song a dance song is really hard to watch for li chenxu bc its makes it hard for him to shine at his own song which is sad :( also lzx's rap is questionable lol but cjh's vocal part in the middle part is so emotional, I hope he felt like he was able to express himself fully there

Lol does gjm not realize they didnt have a choice to not dance. Lollllll cheng xiao literally said they had too much to do and tried very hard but he didnt listen.

Aww jackson teaching them about team work :') o gosh I have PTSD about jin fan getting classified as a vocal now after uuu..... also not surprised the entire segment was about sxl and even the judging portion lol....

Oof Jin fan's voiceeee I love

Man why does Jin fan always get stuck in not dance songs ><

more appreciation for xu zhaohao vocals pls!!! imo sxl has a poor attitude :/ he doesnt perform calmly under pressure and isnt doing well at making a good atmosphere for practice

LOL why do i feel like lin mo is always saying "song" things hahahah hes really a kid

but mannn yan an just walking into the elevator is so oof

Aw duan xuyu is too nice... but I guess this is the leader in him coming out

Aw yan an immediately encouraging xikan when he lost the center to him

Lolll xikans little “heheh” when he won

Mannnn ngl even tho yan an leaves the show, I kinda wish he had a bigger role in this perf bc it's literally like his jam.... chinese style influenced dance.... I wish he had at least 1 memorable dance move, like I feel like Luo Joe already had one in the last perf and he has one again here (and hes very talented and he deserves recognition!) but yan an has yet to really show anything and im scared hes gonna just disappear soon :/

They all did so well tho!!! Truly a group of dancers. Really made me want to rewatch the whole thing immediately. altho the beginning I cant unsee the lin mo meme LOL

and xikan did really well!! His stage presence is real. And hes put effort into his facial expressions

Luo Joe being cute is iconic

Aw yan an cheering on lin mo when revealing his votes!!

Aw I'm surprised 100 ways kids didnt get more votes.... lol ngl i feel like this show is just randomly adding vote bonuses in for random reasons not prespecified for kids they like.... cough gjm yet again

but oo the next ep looks fun hahahha im excited for a happier ep thats not as stressful.

Ycw keeping it real 2020: "im not good at controlling emotions.... i hope if you want to cry or laugh do it loudly, dont care about what other people think"

ok so maybe im liking more new kids than i expected, but i think thats a good thing that the show is making them likable and some kids are able to stand out! honestly i realized I kinda can see why they eliminated so many to begin with. It's sad but also kinda nice tbh (ouch, i know) bc if they really got rid of the ones who have less skill, it makes it easier for the others who dont have to teach from zero (cough lin mo) And then those with skill get to have at least 3(?) stages, unlike qcyn where jin fan got eliminated after only doing 1 silly stage lol The skill level of the stages is also raised, like there's multiple groups of almost all people who are well qualified. im sure the kids are happy that they get to do more stages, im sure that means a lot to them.

At least on snzm they attempt to give most trainees a positive light and give screentime to more than just the top 10 trainees. and they allow someee time for vocals, dancers and rappers to get appreciation (even tho dancers are still dominating lol)

but yea honestly I disliked the judging on pdc2019 too tho so at least the judges here can be supportive... at times. it is SUPER biased and gjm is very vocal despite his lack of knowledge tho lol

it's so bad bc I feel like my standards for shows are so low at this point. my standards get lowered with every show I watch. It's like I guess the snzm songs are okay bc I hated the ones on afo more so at least the stages aren't thattt bad lol At least the rules/general setup aren't as terrible as they were on afo..... at least the camera time isnt as biased as it was on qcyn.... sigh the show isnt doing great, and itd be best if the show would help the tygers get more popular, but I guess its prob better than just doing nothing at star master lol.

qcyn was just painful to watch from "spirit of the knight" onward bc momo literally was buried, mistreated, disrespected and taken advantage of. at least on snzm he gets some screentime and positive recognition.....

tbh i like snzm, maybe thats an unpopular opinion, but at least there have been some really great stages, where the kids really get to shine. at least i can confidently say that bc of snzm, i have met some new kids who i will be sure to follow for new music moving forward :)

#rants

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