#Dont expect good writing from me at this hour :3

[zelphin124]

DISCLAIMER: I do not know much about Therapist!Sans, but I was bored so I thought I'd write a lil script with him giving therapy to Ink!Sans (which I think would be very chaotic)

Also, I've never been to therapy before so I don't know how this technically works 😅

Therapist!Sans belongs to @tehrogueva

Ink!Sans belongs to @comyet

Enjoy!

The room was still. There was no breeze, no sound, and no darkness. Every part of the room was lit with a dim light overhead, erasing the shadows from all of the objects. There was only a wooden chair to the left of the room which was accompanied with a small desk by its side. In front of this chair was a maroon sofa. A rectangular carpet with a pine tree design laid between the furniture.

There wasn't much to observe. In fact, the tan walls of the room were quite barren. Occasionally, there were small papers with green and brown designs hung across the room. There was a small billboard above the desk with a few drawings on them. The door was darker than all the browns in the area. It reflected off the yellow-tinted light. The lights themselves were small lightbulbs hung by a single chain on the ceiling. The air would've been heavy and filled with stench if it wasn't for the air conditioner in the corner.

The dark brown door opened as Ink stepped inside. His eyes lit with curiosity as he observed the room. He wasn't sure why he needed therapy. Heck, he didn't even remember how he got there. Why was he here again?

He checked the notes on his scarf. He tried to make out what he wrote. Ah, there it was. He had gone to therapy because _____ told him to go. He couldn't make out the smudged word of who told him to come here. However, Ink trusted whoever it was; he wouldn't have written it down if the person wasn't someone he trusted.

Or did Error tell him to go to therapy as an insult and he wanted to remember it?

Ink patted himself down when he forgot what he was thinking about. Where was his sketchbook? Did he leave it in the doodle sphere again? He didn't like being bored and had no intention to stay bored. He would've started to draw on the billboard, but he couldn't find the right markers to do so.

The room reminded the guardian of the Anti-Void. He didn't care for big open spaces. He wanted to fill such empty expanses with light, color, and beauty. At least, that's what he wanted to do if he drank his vials.

To his relief, it wasn't completely barren. However, the walls were lacking any decoration. Maybe it was to keep people from being distracted, or it was a new office and it hadn't been decorated yet.

No matter! Ink loved making decorations. He could assist with drawing the pictures and hanging them up! This place would look more vibrant in no time. All he needed was his brush...

His brush that he left outside the office.

Why did he leave it out there again? Ink checked his scarf again. Something about it being too big and whacking things... As well as covering the area in paint...

He eyes glanced back down to the notes he previously read. Someone had told him to go to therapy after he burned down an AU.

Wait... I did WHAT?!

"Good afternoon," an unfamiliar voice said softly behind him. "I apologize for being late. Please, take a seat."

Ink spun around to find a skeleton he had never seen before. He was a variation of Sans like himself. He had large eyes and a genuine smile. Green glasses rested on his non-existent nose; Ink noticed they were taped to the side of his head. Ink could tell he was tired, but not the sleepy kind of tired. It was more the-past-week-has-felt-like-one-giant-day tired.

Ink loved the soft colors that bounced off the skeleton's attire. He wore an off-white wool cardigan and dark brown gloves. His green turtleneck shirt complimented his glasses. The blue shorts on his legs possessed green stripes and visually led onlookers down to his pink slippers. His small hands held a clipboard and a pen made from a small bone. Although Ink saw that he was more expressive than Classic, he could tell the skeleton's shoulders were tense despite his fatigue.

"Hello!" Ink greeted, waving his hand before extending it. "I'm Ink! It's nice to meet you, what's your name?"

"You can call me Doc, Ink," Doc shook Ink's hand before signaling for him to sit down. "Tell me a bit about yourself. I heard that you love art."

"Who told you that? Because loving art is a total understatement," Ink adjusted his clothes as he sat down on the sofa. "I adore it! It's one of the best things in the world! In fact, I wouldn't be here without art! Creativity is a beautiful thing that should inspire others and be shared!"

"Indeed it should," Doc nodded as he wrote something down on his clipboard. "What else do you like to do?"

"Well, I love to inspire others. When I'm not battling Error or chilling with Dream and Swap, I adore going to different AUs and observing people's creations! Sometimes I talk with the creators of the AUs themselves to help them out. Like one time I inspired my friend named XGaster..." Ink trailed off, glancing at the billboard with the small green and brown drawing. "What were we talking about again?"

Doc scribbled more things on his paper before giving a warm smile. "I'm asking some ice-breaker questions before we get started on your therapy," he answered. "I'm here to help you with your problems."

"What problems?" Colorful question marks glimmered in Ink's eyes. Why was it so hard to remember simple things today? He knew his memory was bad, but surely it wasn't always this bad. Is it getting worse? Ink asked himself in his head.

The therapist stared at Ink for a long time. To Ink's surprise, he didn't find the silence uncomfortable. He was perfectly content with the skeleton staring at him and not saying anything at all. Had it been anyone else, Ink would've started to become nervous.

"I have an idea," Doc set his clipboard down. "Why don't we draw something to hang up on my walls? I would love to display some of your art here. Plus, while we are drawing, you can tell me what's been happening in your life recently."

"Oh that would be great!" Joy surged through Ink's mind. "I was going to comment about the emptiness of the room. I wondered why it was so barren."

"This office is new, so I haven't had much time to hang things up yet," Doc answered before he informed Ink he would return with art supplies.

When the therapist returned, Ink wasted no time, grabbing the acrylic paints as quickly as he could. He had so many ideas on what he wanted to draw. He eventually decided he was going to draw a pine forest to match the aesthetic of the room. Doc sat his clipboard by his side as he watched Ink's brush fly across the paper.

Doc didn't even have to ask any questions. Ink started to ramble about his day... At least what he could remember of it. He talked about having tea with Dream and Swap before mentioning his battle with Error. He went on and on about how beautiful OuterTale was before he lost his train of thought.

Doc listened intently, drawing a cliffed landscape and taking notes. "You mentioned Dream and Swap, are these your friends?"

"Oh yeah. We are the Star Sanses. We fight for the AUs and their happiness. We work together a lot," Ink stroked the brown paint on the trunks of his trees. "Although we've been separating lately."

"How does that make you feel?"

Ink glanced away from his art up at the therapist. What an odd question; no one had asked him that before. He started to twitch with his fingers before replying. "I don't know how to answer that question, Doc. I don't really feel anything about it." He glanced down at his vials. "I don't have emotions. I'm given emotions through these vials, but they're fake. Nothing that I feel is actually real. I don't have a soul to feel things."

"I see," Doc picked up his pen and wrote it down on his paper.

"Me and Dream have different motives and intentions for the AUs sometimes. Swap wanted to go home and assist his brother more. I spend most of my time bugging Error about his love for chocolate and the truce he forced me to accept. Although we both kinda broke that recently."

"Tell me more about Error."

Ink told the Doc all that he could recall about the glitched skeleton. He described how they met, how they became enemies, and how the truce was agreed upon. He backtracked to find moments with Error and memorable fights between them. Ink tried to explain to Doc how Error was the only skeleton who could understand him, and yet they were complete opposites, driving them apart.

About an hour had passed. The therapist listened to the guardian closely, however, he stopped Ink when black tears started to run down his face. Ink had gotten emotional when he recalled how Error destroyed most if not all the AUs.

"I... I didn't feel anything at the time," Ink wiped his face. He glanced in confusion at his fingers. Am I crying? "I didn't drink my vials so I felt nothing when Error destroyed the multiverse. But now... It hurts to even think about."

The Doc sat his drawing aside and picked up his clipboard. "Why do you think that is?"

Ink's tears fell onto his drawing. They covered the trees in various patches. He wondered how he could incorporate them into his forest drawing. "I guess... Because I love the AUs and their creativity. I wouldn't want anyone's inspiration to be crushed. I wouldn't want to harm an AU..." He glanced at his scarf. "It says on my scarf I came here because I burned down an AU though..."

"What do you think about that?"

"It doesn't help my reputation..." Ink wiped his face again. "I'm portrayed as a villain now. A lot of people don't like me after certain actions-" He wiped his face again. He didn't like crying. He didn't even know why he was crying, let alone in front of a Sans he didn't know. He didn't feel sad on the inside, but it was as if something inside him had shattered. Did he regret his actions? Was he mourning for the loss of the AUs? Was all the talk about him being a murderous psychopath with no emotions getting to him? He couldn't say. His emotions were confusing as they were. If he couldn't figure himself out, how could Doc Sans figure him out?

"This is good for you to acknowledge all of this," Doc Sans broke his thoughts. His voice was soothing and slow. "There's a lot to unpack here. I would love to meet with you on a regular basis so we can work through all this. Can you meet the same time next week?"

The tears had stopped flowing from the guardians eyes. "Time is a little hard for me to grasp since I love outside of it."

"Oh, yes of course," the therapist replied. "In that case, I'll talk with the office to find a way to signal you to come back when it's time. But might I reassure you in one thing today?"

Ink shrugged. "Go for it."

"You don't just drink one of your vials, right? You drink all of them at once."

Ink glanced down at his paint vials. They glowed with intensity according to their designated color. All of them were nearly empty. "Yeah, I drink all of them."

"So that means you feel all the emotions and they can alternate your mood depending on the situation. I wouldn't call your emotions fake. You're not forcing yourself to drink one vial to feel that way. You drink all of them at once, making your emotions as real as anyone else's; constantly present."

"Really?" Ink exclaimed before he vomited a bunch of ink from his mouth. He stared blankly at the Doc before looking back at his drawing. Whew, the ink missed his paper entirely.

"I'll uh... call someone to come clean that up," the smile on the therapist's face faded. He glanced over at Ink's drawing. "You're very talented, Ink. Can I hang that on my wall?"

Ink nodded. Doc knelt down and picked up the drawing. The smile returned to his face. "Look at these black streaks across the trees that you made with your tears."

Ink was quite proud of how we wove his tears into his art. They created shadows across the forest and shade between the leaves. There were millions of shades of greens and browns in the pine forest that he drew. The painting would look lovely under the dim lights of the office.

"That's what we are going to do with everything you've bottled up," Doc explained. "We are going to take that pain and weave it into the beautiful story of your life. No story is complete without suffering. Here's your first lesson, Ink."

For the first time in his life, Ink had nothing to say. He wanted to listen to Doc talk. His fingers twitched as he waited for the therapist to continue.

"Suffering is necessary in our lives. Because without it, the happiest moments of our lives wouldn't be so sweet as they are," he explained. "Our lives will never be perfect. Just like paintings are never perfect. But our lives, like these paintings, aren't supposed to show us perfection. They reflect who we are, and the progress we made."

What an interesting take. It was as if Doc was talking like they had run out of time.

Wait... they had run out of time.

Was the session already over? Ink didn't feel like he spent an entire hour talking. Was that what therapy was? Just talking until stuff comes up?

Ink wasn't sure how to feel about the whole therapy thing. He enjoyed drawing and talking to the new Sans, but it was odd for him to feel things so raw when he recalled memories. He never felt such strong emotions about any memories before, why had it struck him now? What was all of that hidden pain Doc was talking about? Did he really have bottled up pain like all the rest of the Sanses?

He lost his trail of thought, only remembering what the therapist had said Ink grabbed a pen and started to write down what the therapist said on his scarf. "I bet all of that was important, I just don't understand it right now."

Doc chuckled softly. "You'll understand more as we work through your life together. I'll be in touch with you shortly, thank you for coming."

Ink finished writing down what the therapist had said. "Thanks for having me, Doc! I'll see you next time!"

The guardians gaze went from Doc's warm smile to the painting Ink drew within the hour. It wasn't perfect, no, but it reminded Ink about what the therapist had said before he exited the room.

It's not about about perfection... But about the progress I make.

#therapist!sans #doc sans #docs #DocSans #therapist sans #ink!sans #ink sans #therapy #i tried #fandom #this is not canon #ITS ELEVEN FRICKIN O'CLOCK AT NIGHT #Dont expect good writing from me at this hour :3

[i-cant-sing]

TIME TRAVELER AU PT 2

Original post/idea here. Part 1 is here. Part 3 is here.

Check out my MASTERLIST for more!

I fucked up.

You thought as you sat on the bed, holding your head in your hands.

I fucked up so baaaaaad.

Not only have you healed Baldwin of his leprosy, forever changing history of the LEPER KING, but also managed to somehow be his bride. To make matters EVEN worse, you cant just up and leave right now because you dont know the disastrous effects it'll have on the future now that Baldwin wont die of leprosy, which means that the kingdom of Jerusalem wont fall to Salauddin and his muslim army and after that its just a domino effect.

You tried to view your options here.

I stay here, marry Baldwin and fuck up the fabric of time and space because how can someone from the future marry someone from the past? Wouldnt I cease to exist?

I leave, return to my time where authorities arrest me for fucking around with time- that is, if I even exist in the future now that I've altered history. Who knows if my ancestors survived/were born after this?

No. Neither option is good. I need to stay here and fix this. But in a way that i dont draw too much attention to myself so that im so insignificant that nobody remembers, let alone writes about me in the history books.

You were drawn out of your thoughts with someone knocking on your door. "Come in." You said, straightening yourself.

A couple of servants walked in, all women. "Princess Y/n." They all courtesied. "We've been sent here by his majesty to prepare you for dinner with him."

Princess? Ah yes. Only a couple of hours ago, Baldwin had proposed to you, I guess the concept of asking wasnt a thing here as he just slipped on the big beautiful ring on your finger.

You narrowed your eyes at them. "First of all, Im not a princess. You will address me as Y/n only. And secondly, Im not going to join him for dinner, so there's no need to prepare me" The maids all shared a look of confusion before the head servant spoke.

"But we cant address you as anything else until you wed the king, after which you will be our queen, princess."

"Didnt I just tell you not to call me princess? Just call me Y/n!" The head maid shook her head. "Princess, we can not do that. If we do, then we would be punished. And we must prepare you for dinner with his majesty!" The maids moved ahead to start helping you but you raised a hand, halting them.

"I said, no." You said sternly.

"What... what will we tell the king, princess? He's expecting you-"

"Tell him i cant come because Im sic- no, Im not feeling well and Id like to be alone." You cant say "sick" in this era, because that means "death sentence" here and you dont want to be fretted over and bring attention to yourself as "the king's fiancee got SICK!". Besides, you do need to be away from Baldwin as much as possible and have some time to plot your moves.

-

You had pulled out your notebook and began writing out dates and historic events of this era to plan your escape. You're trying to find some sort of shortcut where Baldwin gets sick again and dies, leaving his kingdom in the hands of his sister and brother in law, who will bring its downfall-

Someone knocked on your door gently. "Princess?" You quickly hid your notebook. "Come in."

Baldwin walked inside and towards you, eyes worried as they scanned you up and down.

"I heard you're not feeling well?" He asked and before you had a chance to back away, he had cupped your cheeks in his hands tenderly. "What's wrong? Shall I fetch the royal physician?"

"No." You replied with your face smushed in his hands. "I'm fine." You pulled your face away his large hands.

Confusion spread through his blue orbs. "Then why did you not join me for dinner?" He asked, using a hand to push your hair over your ear, not taking the hint that you didn't want him touching you.

"I just-" what possible excuse could you come up with that would be both effective and not insulting enough to have your head chopped off. "you- you dont care about me."

Baldwin looked at you in bewilderment. "I dont... care about you? Princess, how can you say that?" He tried to cup your cheek again but you backed away before he could, putting on a face of hurt.

"How can I not? You dont care about what I want, or even ask me what I need?" You feingned pain in your voice, turning away from him for dramatic effect.

He grabbed your shoulders and turned you towards him, his pupils grew wide as if trying to search for what it is that you need. "My love, what do you want? Just say the word, and I'll give it to you."

You looked down, again for the theatrics, and Baldwin lifted your chin. "Go on."

"You never- never asked me to marry you."

"Huh? But I did today-"

"No, you stated it- demanded I marry you." You furrowed your brows and looked down again.

Baldwin smiled. Of course, how could he have not asked you? You were a girl after all, you want to be courted the traditional way. Its not your fault that you dont know that kings do not ask permission for things. They just get it, because who would refuse to marry a king?

He kissed your forehead, lifting your chin again to meet his eyes. "Im sorry, princess. I shouldve asked." He took your hands in his and had that charming smile again. "Will you marry me, Y/n?"

"No." You shook your head. "I... I cant marry you, your majesty." You said, adding tears into your eyes. His brows furrowed in concern.

"What? Why?" You tried pulling your hands away but he didnt let go, tightening his grip ever so slightly.

"I-" well, you could say that youre not catholic and the church would never let you two get married, but you also dont wanna be tortured for being a "heretic". Maybe religious differences could be the last plan. Taking your silence as hesitance, Baldwin spoke. "I can offer you everything and more. Jerusalem would be yours. What is it that I lack that anyone else could offer?"

"I am not a good match for you!" Ah yes, lets do the typical "its not you, its me." You bit your lip as you yanked your hands out of his and walked towards the window, your back to him (theatrics). "You and I are not equals- no we are nowhere close! Youre a king, your father was a king, your family is royalty. I come from nothing, as did my ancestors. There will never be stability in our marriage when we come from such different backgrounds!" You never thought that you would be putting yourself down and call yourself "inferior" to break up with a man.

Silence hung in the air, as you held your breath.

"Youre right." You heard him say behind you. "We are not equals, we never will be." For some reason, instead of being relieved, a chill ran down your spine. Baldwin wrapped his arms around you, resting his head on your shoulder. "I may be a king, but youre far superior to me. You're an angel, sent to me by God, and you saved me. I wouldnt be king anymore if you werent here, princess."

Warmth spread from your cheeks to the tip of your ears, both due to the close proximity and his words. Sensing your bashfulness, he chuckled, kissing your cheek as he turned you around to face him. You could hear your own heart beat at how close he was.

Baldwin tilted his head, half lidded eyes staring at you. "Youre everything and more that I could ask for, princess. Never put yourself down and compare yourself to me, hm?" He said, giving your arms a gentle squeeze before moving away, but not detaching himself completely as he took ahold of your hand and looked back at you.

"Now that this is settled, let us go eat. I've had the servants prepare a feast for us and then we can discuss wedding arrangements-" shit shit shit shit shit fuck it!

"I'm not catholic!" Baldwin halted at that. You've already said it, might as well dig yourself a deeper hole. You let the tears form in your eyes. "Im... Muslim. I didnt tell you because I didnt want you to think I was working for Salauddin and spying on you for him, you know I wasnt! I really did only want to know about you. Please believe me, I wasnt-"

"I believe you."

What? Just like that.

"You- you believe me?" You breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you. Once again, Im sorry i didnt tell you I was a Muslim, but dont worry, I'll pack my things and leave tonight-"

"Why? We still have to get married."

You blinked slowly. "But... Im Muslim?"

Baldwin shrugged. "So? It doesnt change anything."

You looked at him in bafflement. "It does! It changes everything! We cant get married! Im a Muslim! The church wont allow interfaith marriages, and I dont intend on converting to catholicism either if thats what youre suggesting!"

"I am not suggesting that. You can be a muslim if you want to, but we're still getting married." Baldwin stated matter of factly.

"The church wont allow it-"

"The church will do as I say. I am the head of the church. Besides-" He smiled.

"I dont remember angels having to prove themselves to be a catholic. You saved my life, you cured my incurable disease. As far as the church is concerned, youre a miracle sent to me by God. Youre the Chosen One!"

Is he... is he hearing himself? Can you try to convince him?

"But... but Jerusalem deserves a Catholic Queen-" you tried weakly, but he cupped your cheek and smiled gently at you.

"I am Jerusalem, Y/n. And I deserve you." Was all he said before pecking your forehead.

He tugged you along with him. "Now, we have to eat."

You dont want to eat. You want to stay behind and think of another strategy because clearly you cant talk yourself out of this wedding.

"I'm- I'm not hungry." You said, making him frown.

"How is that possible? You havent had anything since morning. I dont want you getting sick before the wedding." Baldwin continued to pull you along.

Does he not listen?

"I dont want to eat- I- dont feel like it." You said a bit harshly this time, hoping he'd take the hint.

And he did, finally stopping. He sighed and let go of your hand. "Okay. I suppose if you really dont want to, we can skip dinner tonight." Fucking finally. "Its just... I seem to have developed a habit of enjoying meals with you. And now that my leprosy is cured and I have no more diet restrictions, I just- I had the kitchen prepare some of my favourite dishes that I was able to enjoy before my disease disabled me."

You stared at him. Is he- is he trying to guilt trip you? Baldwin once told you that due to leprosy he had ulcers in his mouth, and he couldnt eat different types of food, and was only able to have bland, soft goo.

You looked away from his big sad eyes. He's not getting to you. You need to go back to your room, make yourself scarce, be far away from him as often as possible.

"You can still go and eat dinner alone."

With one hand, he cupped your cheek. "Princess, you know I cant eat until you eat too. But its okay, if you dont want to eat, then I wont too. I guess I'll just have the servants finish the chicken roast and oh-! They even made strawberry cream cake for dessert. But- maybe another day."

You looked into his eyes, those blue orbs that were filled with sadness, resembling a kid who was just told "no candy!"

Sighing, you held his hand. "Maybe I can have a few bites."

His face lit up. Ah, he knew you'd come around. "Lets go!"

-

The next day, youre helped by the maids to get ready for the day. Apparently, Sibylla wanted to meet you and discuss some things, and you suspect she wants to talk about the wedding preprations.

The maids had prepared your bath and were very insistent on washing you themselves but you made them all leave the bath chambers. Finally, they compromised when you told them that they could dress you up if they wait outside.

Setting your old clothes on the bed, you entered the bathroom and settled into the warm water. The essential oils and flower petals soothed your mind and body, and you finally had some desperately needed silence to hear your own thoughts.

Last night at dinner, Baldwin was very- well, "happy" would be an understatement to how he felt near you. And all those forehead kisses and skin contact doesnt go unnoticed by you either. You suppose that since he had leprosy, he never really had or was allowed to touch anyone else. But now that hes cured, all thanks to your dumb ass, he craves the physical intimacy.

You closed your eyes as you sank deeper into the warm water. Gosh, did I really have to give him the water? Had I not done that, he would still be ridden with lepro-

Your eyes snapped open. Thats it. You just have to make sure he never drank your water in the first place! Yes! You can go back in time and sure, its always dangerous to go back in the same time period more than once, but you really dont have any other option now, do you?

After half an hour, you finally exited the bathroom and the maids practically ushered you to sit in the chair as they finally, FINALLY got to dress up the future queen of Jerusalem and after a whole hour, they're finally done. And... well you look good. Your hair has been done nicely, and a delicate golden headpiece, almost like a elegant hair band sits on top of your head. They added some color to your cheeks and lips with crushed berries. As for your clothes, they dressed you in a dark blue tunic with loose, flowing sleeves. The tunic itself was made of silk, probably brought in from the Byzantine empire and was only available to the upperclass of this time.

"I am not wearing those!" You said when they opened the jewellery boxes. There were diamonds and other precious stones adorning the earrings and necklaces.

"But princess, you must wear these. It is royal protocol for the king's bride to be, and the future queen to wear the royal jewels." The head maid said. She doesnt know that you dont plan on sticking around and if you leave wearing these jewels, who knows what havoc would that cause?

"No. I dont want to wear them."

The maids shared a look of concern. "What?" You asked them.

"Its just... his majesty picked these out for you himself. He would be mad at us if you were not wearing these." One of the younger servants spoke as she fumbled with her fingers. Through the mirror, you looked at everyone's worried expression. You doubt that someone as calm and collected as Baldwin would lose his marbles over his fiancee not wearing jewellery.

"I dont think the king would be mad at you if I dont wear some jewellery. He isnt one to get angry that easily, you know?" You said chuckling, but it died when you saw them share the same concerned looks again. This time, you turned away from the mirror to look at them directly. "What? Go on, no secrets."

Another maid mustered up the courage to mumble. "Well- it's just- the king- I mean- his majesty is calm but um-" she paused to look at the other maids for help but they all avoided eye contact. "Out with it." You said a bit sternly.

"His majesty... gets... emotional- yes, emotional! When it comes to matters concerning you."

"Emotional? What do you mean? Speak clearly, no word will get out of this room, I promise." You spoke all while glaring at the other maids to make them silently comply to not tattle on their friend.

The maid bit her lip. "His majesty... gets mad when he thinks that you're not being treated well." You gave her a look to continue. "A few weeks back, while you were strolling out in the garden, his majesty reprimanded some of his knights for not escorting you. He asked them why they weren't guarding you?"

A few weeks back? It may have made some sense for Baldwin to be protective of his bride to be, but you two weren't engaged until yesterday. And before that, his relationship with you was barely platonic, more like a king-servant thing.

"Tell her about the kitchen incident too." Another maid whispered.

"What kitchen incident?"

"Um, 2 months ago, when the kitchen had prepared a feast for his majesty, he almost fired the entire kitchen staff for serving olives with the entree." You gave them a quizzical look. "Well, his majesty had told them that you can't eat olives and had told them not to include it in the palace's food. But it was a feast to celebrate his victory and the staff thought it'd be best to add olives because the king likes them."

Your eyes widened at that. He almost fired the kitchen staff because you said you can't eat olives? I mean, it's not like you're deathly allergic, you just didn't like how tart they were and when Baldwin saw you picking them out on your plate, all you could manage to blurt out was that you can't eat them. Perhaps, he thought you had diet restrictions like him.

You huffed. That still didnt warrant such a reaction from him. "That isn't nice. Don't worry, I'll talk to him."

The maid looked at you in horror. "No! I mean, his majesty would not like that we- um..." she tried to come up with appropriate words that wouldn't be insulting. Her scrunched up face as she thought hard made you giggle.

"Fine, fine. I won't say anything to him. You have my word." You said, smiling at them assuringly.

The head maid then held out the pearl necklace to you. You sighed and nodded, and they all cheered as they started picking out the jewels for you.

Its okay. You told yourself. I can always drop them somewhere before time travelling.

-

As soon as you were dressed, one of Sibylla's lady-in-waiting came to fetch you. She hurried you, saying something along the lines of "you must see princess Sibylla right away!" And you couldn't stop her from pulling you along, so time travelling will have to wait.

"Princess Sibylla needs to see you right away, princess!" The maid said as she pulled you towards a room. Knocking on it, the door swung open and you were met with the sight of different gowns hanging on dummies with maids tending to them, and right in the center of the room was Sibylla, practically jumping on her heels.

"Y/n!" She yelled out as she ran towards you and engulfed you in a hug before her lady in waiting, the same one standing beside you, cleared her throat. It caught Sibylla's attention who gasped softly before backing away and immeadiately giving you a courtesy. "I mean, princess Y/n." You gave a nasty look to the lady in waiting before shaking your head at an embarrassed Sibylla. "You don't need to courtesy to me, princess Sibylla."

She immeadiately beamed. "Of course I do! You're not going to be just my sister in law, you're also going to be Queen of Jerusalem! Of course i bow to you."

Me, a queen? Yeah, we'll see about that.

"Still, I consider us friends before anything else." You offerer her a small smile. "You called for me?"

"Oh? Oh, yes!" She immeadiately grabbed your hand and pulled you further into the room. "I didn't know what colours and material you preferred, so I ordered them to bring everything with the best seamstresses in kingdom!" She pointed at the seamstresses, who bowed to you.

"But... I don't need clothes. I already have a wardrobe." Your statement made Sibylla laugh as did a few of her hand maidens.

"Ahh, you're so naive!" Sibylla giggled. "That wardrobe doesn't exist anymore. You're a princess, soon to be queen, you need a royal wardrobe!" She said as she dragged her hand over one of the gowns, feeling the material. "And! You still have to select your bridal gown!"

For the next 3 hours, Sibylla had the maids show you different gowns and materials, even helping by giving her input as to what would suit you.

"I still like my old clothes, they're quite comfortable." You sighed. Designing your new wardrobe was not something that needed your urgent attention at the moment. You need to return to your room and get the time machine from your old dress and leave this era.

Sibylla nods. "I understand what you're going through. I still remember how they burned away my entire wardrobe when I married Guy. But I suppose its poetic in a way. Since you're starting a new life, so why not start one by getting new clothes!"

Wait.

"They burnt all your old clothes?" Sibylla nods. "Mmhmm! In a way, you're burning away your past! And starting a new-" You didn't stick around as you immeadiately rushed out of the room and made your way towards your own.

You can't- your old clothes has your time machine. If they burn it, you can't ever leave!

You burst into your room, looking at the empty spot on your bed where you'd left your clothes before going in the bath.

"No." The maids, they must've put it in your closet. You searched it, searched your entire room but to no avail.

A maid walked into your room, watching you tear apart the bedroom. "P-princess? May I help-"

"Where are my clothes?!" You walked upto her, the poor maid's fright apparently on her face. "WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES!?"

"They- they're burning it-"

"WHERE?!"

"The gardens!"

You ran out of your room, and made your way towards the royal gardens as fast as you could, but with how huge this palace was, getting there took a while. Not to mention when you did get to the gardens, you didn't spot anyone there, but you did notice the smell of something burning, which lead you to the back of the gardens, that was away from everyone's sight.

There you found them, two maids burning your clothes in a small bonfire.

"PUT IT OUT!" You yelled as you rushed towards them, startling them.

"Princess-" they began bowing.

"Didn't you hear me? PUT THE FIRE OUT!" They scrambled about trying to find some water, but of course, they didn't have it.

"I'll get it from the fountain!" The two maids ran to get a bucket of water for you, but it would be too late by the time they came. So when you spotted your old dress burning, you pulled it out with bare hands, not caring about burning yourself.

The dress was mostly burnt to ashes, while only few bits remained that were still on fire. You managed to wrangle out your time machine out of it, the small metal box that was burning hot and left marks on your skin as you tried to hold it.

But even from here, you could see the damage was done. The area that displayed the year had now completely melted off, as did some of the buttons.

No. No. No. No. No. NO!

You couldn't help but cry as reality began to set in. You're stuck here.... you're stuck here forever.

Heart wrenching sobs wracked your body as you tried to hold the hot metal machine in your hands, your skin burning as you tried. Even when the servants came and poured the water on the fire, you still kept on crying, clutching your machine to your chest, partly to conceal it, partly from helplessness.

The maids looked at each in worry as they tried to console you, tried to pacify you, lest you had them executed. But it didn't matter, you were inconsolable. While one of the maids sat by your side, trying to soothe you, the other one ran in to get help.

Moments later, when you were able to hide the machine in your clothes again, someone came up and touched your shoulder from behind.

"Y/n?" You looked up through your tears. It was Baldwin. For some reason, seeing him only made you cry harder as you finally realised that you were stuck here with him. That you fucked up permanently.

"Oh princess. What's wrong? Don't cry- shhh, I'm here." He pulled your body towards him, letting you sob into his chest heartbreakingly. Exhaustion, frustration and shock must have overtook your body, as you fainted in his arms.

"Princess? Y/n?" He tried waking you up before collecting you in his arms and rushing back into the castle.

-

Hours later, you woke up to find yourself back in your room, lying in your bed. Your eyes looked down at your hands which were now wrapped in bandages. They only served as a reminder of what youd lost- your time machine.

Tears welled up in your eyes again. Am I- am I really stuck here? You sniffled.

A hand came up to caress your cheek, startling you.

It was Baldwin. "Princess? Do you want to tell me what happened?" His soft tone made you even more sad, and you raised your bandaged hands to wipe your tears, but he caught your wrists and lowered them back gently, using his own hands to wipe away the tears.

"No, you cant use your hands for sometime. The burns need to heal." His hand remained on your cheek, thumb caressing the area under your eye. "What happened, Y/n? Why were you so upset?"

You cant avoid the topic for long, and now that your way of escape is gone, you need to be careful of what you say and how you act around the king.

You let out a shaky breath. "They... they burned my clothes."

"Mmhm. Dont worry, I will have them bring in the fanciest clothes for you. Sibylla will make sure of it. Only the best for my princess." You shook your head. "Its not- its not that... They were my clothes... they burned away-"

"I know... but its a tradition. The maids burn away the bride-to-be's old clothes to signify that youre detaching yourself from the past and starting a new life." He explained, watching as you sniffled. Clearly, you were still upset over this.

"But the maids, they still should've informed you of this tradition before doing anything. I know how emotional of a transition this could be for girls." You nodded sadly, heart still sinking at the loss of your machine. "Dont worry though, they will be punished harshly for it. I have them in the dungeons tonight, and tomorrow-"

"What? Punished? No!" You cut him off. You dont want anyone to die because of you, especially when you dont know if anyone these people could potentially be an ancestor of yours.

"But they caused you harm. You burned yourself due to their-"

"No, no. Please, don't punish anyone- I- it was my fault for not knowing about royal traditions! Please, your Majesty, I beg you- don't do this- i- i-" You pleaded.

"Shhh, okay. Okay. I won't punish them for it." He patted your hair. "On one condition."

You looked at him in confusion.

"You call me Baldwin from now on." He grinned. "We are to be husband and wife soon, I don't want us to use royal titles with each other."

Your eyes widened. Is he- is he really giving up titles? You're not that blind to see his attempts at intimacy, but what you don't understand is why or even how you came to be on the receiving end of it.

What exactly is it about you that has made him want to marry you? Surely, Baldwin would've preferred to marry someone of this era, someone who is more compatible with him. Despite you trying to blend in the past months, you allowed Baldwin to see how you're not... as Conservative as most people of this time period are. One could say that he may be impressed by how intelligent you are than others, but it also brings up the factor of being "threatened" or "insulted" by the same intelligence.

Even though you consider beauty to be a "subjective" thing, the whole "beauty is in the eye of the beholder", you're not blind to how attractive others are. So why not them?

Did he only like you because you're intriguing? Does he still think you're a spy? Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer?

Probably. Or maybe he really does believe all that mumbo jumbo about you being "an angel sent to save him."

"As you wish... Baldwin."

-

Last night, after Baldwin had left you to rest, you stayed up and tried to figure out if you can fix your time machine, and if not, then can you built another one?

Fucking hell. You closed your eyes. I made it once, I can build it again. But it's easier said than done.

Back in the present, you had the technology to build it. Now? You have to first make the technology and the tools from scratch before you could even get on making your time machine, all while keeping your science project discrete, which was easier before because you weren't going to be married to a fucking King!

Right now, you're sitting in Baldwin's private dining room (yes, there are more than one dining room. He's royalty, what did you expect) having breakfast- well, being fed breakfast.

"You really don't need to do this." You said as Baldwin fed you another spoonful. He smiled as he wiped your lips with a napkin. "I don't need to, I want to. Besides, I don't want my princess starving."

Involuntary, your face flushed. "I- the maids could've fed me. And im not a princess." He frowned slightly. "Why would you- open wide, princess- why would you want the maids to feed you when you have me?" He pushed the spoon to your face as you parted your lips, but then he pulled it away and brought his face close to yours. "Do I make you nervous?"

You backed away immediately. "I- no- I mean-"

He burst out laughing. "I'm- I'm sorry princess, but you are just too endearing!" Baldwin chuckled as he grabbed the spoon again and fed you.

Your cheeks reddened, this time more out anger than embarrassment. "I don't want to eat anymore." You muttered, turning your face away.

He smiled as he brought the spoon to your lips again. "Ah ah, but you still haven't had enough." However, you rejected again, looking away instead of replying.

He sighed, placing the spoon back on the plate. "I'm sorry, princess. I shouldn't have laughed at you."

"You shouldn't have." You mumbled, face still turned away from him.

His lips quirked up a bit. "You know, for someone who insists that she's not a princess-" He turned your face to him gently. "- you sure have all the blandishment of one."

"Blandishment?"

"Flattering actions of a princess." He nodded.

You frowned. "Are you calling me a spoiled princess? A brat?"

"I would never!" Baldwin gasped. "I enjoy you acting like royalty, demanding respect and attention. You deserve it and more. Besides-" He picked up some food on the spoon again and brought it to your lips. "Even if if you were a spoiled, bratty princess, I wouldn't mind. I would enjoy spoiling you, hm?" He nudged the spoon to your lips softly.

You parted your lips, making him smile. It really is hard to stay mad at him when he looks at you with his baby blue eyes. They just- they draw you in.

"Also, before I forget, I will be leaving the castle today to meet Salauddin. So you can either hand out with Sibylla, who still wants to help you design your wedding gown, or your can-"

Salauddin? "Why are you meeting Salauddin? Isn't he your enemy?"

He chuckled. "Only on the battlefield. He and I have developed a friendship, or a mutual respect over the years. As to why I'm going to meet him, is... well, you."

"Me?" He nodded. "Since you told me that you're a Muslim, I thought that we could perhaps have a discreet Islamic wedding- what is it called? Nikkah? So, I could go and learn more about it from Salauddin."

You opened your mouth to protest. You don't need to be part of history as the "king of Jerusalem's Muslim wife" or "the Muslim-Christian wedding that took place during the Crusades", even if it might make the world more progressive.

But then, you didn't protest. "Can I come?"

Baldwin raised a brow at you. "You want to meet Salauddin?" You shook you're head. "Well, no, not really. I mean, I don't mind meeting him, but I just want to get out of the castle for a bit. It's been months since i left this place, I just want to get some fresh air." This could be the perfect opportunity for you, because if memory serves you right, Muslims of this era had made significant advances in science. Maybe you can use their help to get some tools to make the time machine again.

Baldwin looked unsure. "I don't know if it would be safe for you-" you held his hand with your bandaged ones. "Please, Baldwin? Can't you take me with you? And wouldn't I be the most safe when I'm with you?" Ah yes, stroke the male ego.

Finally, he smiled.

"Alright. I supposed it would be fine, after all, you should see the kingdom you're going to be the queen of."

Thoughts? (Also, I need to go shower rn, so I'll put the read more later. Doing so much effort for u guys, my spoiled greedy children)

Part 3 is here.

#yandere baldwin #yandere king baldwin #male yandere #yandere male #yandere x reader #yandere x #yandere x darling #yandere #baldwin iv

[chaosisalwayscrying]

SLEEPTALKIN’

⇥ synopsis : 3 times chris heard you talking in your sleep

⇥ warnings : none!! fluff fluff fluff

⇥ extra : my first writing in a hot minute, please dont crucify me if its bad 😕 feel free to send me requests if you actually like my writing 😇

⇥ masterlist !

⇥ taglist !

  by the time chris and his brothers came back from filming, you were already asleep. chris came in the room quietly, shuffling out of his uggs and tugging his shirt over his head. he was beyond ready to just lay down with his girl, he and nick had argued which already annoyed chris, but matt had just egged it on and annoyed him even more.

putting his thoughts to the side, chris lifts up his comforter and crawls in bed with you, wrapping an arm around you as you lay on your stomach. he hears your mumble something unintelligible, making him hum and press a kiss to your cheek. chris shuffles his phone out from his pocket, planning to do a bit of scrolling on tiktok or instagram, whatever gets him tired faster.

   after about ten minutes, chris' eyes were drooping and he was fighting to keep them open. he rolled onto his other side to put his phone down, and when he rolls back over, so do you. you turn over so abruptly your hand flies out and accidentally backhands him. chris opened his mouth to make a snarky comment, but paused when he heard you mumble something.

   "chrissy...?"

   it was barely a whisper, but it makes chris move the arm that was resting on his face back to a comfortable position and whisper back to you. "im right here ma, im right here," he whispers it into your hair, pressing a kiss there after.

   you hum in content, still in a deep sleep. chris leans over once more to make sure youre still sleeping before tucking into your back and going to sleep himself.

—————

you had been sick for the past three days, the bug that had spread through your friends ended up getting you too. and after throwing up your breakfast, you practically begged chris to just get back in bed and nap with you, too tired to stick to the plans you had for the day.

that had been over an hour ago, and chris was still wide awake as you slept on him, not that he was complaining. despite your sickness and willingness to sleep all day, just laying down with you while you napped was good enough for chris.

you beginning to mumble something snapped chris out of his trance, allowing him to listen to what you were saying.

“love you, chrissy..”

you mumble, curling into your boyfriend a little more. this caused chris to brush your hair from your face and press a kiss to your head before returning the sentiment.

“love you too ma, get some rest”

—————

you had decided to sleep in chris’ room as he filmed a fortnite video, which proved to be a mistake as he was extremely loud. you expected him to tone it down a little since you were in there, but he had apparently forgotten all about you.

it wasnt until he got up to take a bathroom break that he saw you under the covers, eyebrows furrowed as you had a frown on your face. guilt washed over him, and despite the fact you were a heavy sleeper, he knew his noise was affecting your dreams, which in turn affected the quality of sleep you got.

once be had used the bathroom, chris came out and knelt on your side of the bed, planning on soothing the frustration on your face before going back to filming.

he rubbed your cheek, which normally eased the tension on your face but it hadn’t this time. he barely caught your mumbles over the new sound of his brothers calling his name loudly through the call, but he managed.

“stop bein’.. so loud chris”

you grumble, obviously still sleeping as a light snore followed your words. chris frowned, pressing a kiss on the bridge of your nose before replying.

“sorry ma, gonna be more quiet” he mumbled, pressing a kiss to your cheek before returning to his gaming setup. this time around, chris was 110% more focused on his noise level and how rowdy he got, not wanting to actually wake up his girl.

#chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo x reader #christopher owen sturniolo #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo x reader #chris x reader #sturniolos #sturn

[sofs16]

perceval shark

charles! fake photographer x singer!reader

HEY! i know that may sound alarming as he is a fake but its quite silly… i think… im about to write it so enjoy <3

— just finished writing; not proofread at all

yn.yln

liked by charles_jpg, and 10,484,393 others

yn.yln hi friends! im currently looking for a photographer to join me on tour for the next month since my cousin (usual photographer) got injured and can’t travel:( send me a message or email in my bio and ill send more deets:) thanks a lot!!! 💌

view all 2,484,393 comments

ynsphoto will she acc reply to like millions of people tho 😭

⤷ yn.yln i really am trying but my instagram dms are glitching now 🫠 my team and i have replied to most of the emails tho:))

july 31, 2023

— mail app, you’ve got 16,483 inbox!

INBOX

From: Charles Perceval >

To: Yn Yln >

July 31, 2023 at 4:18

Hello, Yn!

If you are still in need of a photographer, I would love to help out!

Though I have no real experience aside from taking pictures of my friends, I have a large passion for music as you do.

I hope to hear from you:)

P.S Here is a link to some of my work. Have a good day:)

All the best,

Charles Perceval

NEW EMAIL

To: Charles Perceval >

From: Yn Yln >

Subject: reply asap pls :))

July 31, 2023 at 11:01

Hey, Charles!

I’ve really spent quite a while being mesmerized at your photos and I would loveeee if you could come with us on tour this month!!

The notice is quite short but the schedule would be August 4 to August 28 with us circling Europe. Let me know if there’s any issues and we could work around it:)

Hope to hear from you as well.

All the love,

Yn Yln 🤍

To: Yn Yln

From: Charles Perceval

July 31 at 16:22

Hello, Yn!

I am so glad! There may be a minor issue but could maybe we could talk about it on Instagram.

Would that be alright?:)

All the best,

Charles

Charles Perceval

charles_jpg • Instagram

12 Followers • 83 Posts

Following you since 2017

yn 💌

i must say, the 12 followers and private account is very sketchy, perceval 🤷🏻‍♀️

Charles Perceval

Hello Yn! Why are you judging me on my followers 😂

yn💌

NO IM NOT

im just saying i hope you dont rob me when we meet in real life 😔

Charles Perceval

Thank you for the trust in me. But I would not do that to you😁

yn 💌

sigh.. i guess it’s my fault if i end up dead in a ditch… ANYWAYS!

are you free to meet tomorrow 😁

Charles Perceval

Where exactly?

yn💌

Where are you now?

Charles Perceval

Spa

yn💌

you’re.. in a spa?

Charles Perceval

No! Spa, Belgium

yn💌

that one was NOT on me! But perfect the first stop there is actually Belgium! I can go there if it’s not a problem for you?

Charles Perceval

It is no problem for me:)

yn💌

Charles, don’t take this personally or rudely, but how old are you?

Charles Perceval

26 This October

yn💌

alright! just making sure youre not an old man😁

Charles Perceval

Aw, thank you.

yn💌

my manager will send more details, thanks charles and see you tomorrow:)

charles.jpg

Follow Requests

f1babes + 5,383,292 others

yn.yln has requested to follow you. 1m

confirm | delete

yn.yln

belgium

liked by charles_jpg, and 8,018,382 others

yn.yln i may look fine but i have been hiccuping for the last 2 hours i fret i am getting a six pack

view all 1,198,292 comments

ynsbabe i bet if u turned it to a sing, it’d be a bop

⤷ yn.yln too emotional to turn it into a song

august 2, 2023

yn.updated

liked by 2,483 others

yn.updated yn.yln just landed in Belgium where she will be performing for the first time this Friday!

view all 318 comments

liviesyn streets say she went to dinner with a guy 💔😭😭😭😭😭😭

⤷ ynsday chill. she can have guy friends

⤷ author not this one 😅

august 2, 2023

ynshit

liked by oliviarodrighoe, and 16 others

ynshit NOT WHAT I EXPECTED EMAILING THIS MAN.

view all 10 comments

oliviarodrighoe cant believ u didnt know charles leclerc THATS SO SO SUTPID IM LAUGJGING

⤷ ynshit HE SAID PERCEVAL DUMBASSSSS

⤷lauflaufey if he said leclerc would you have known anyway😭

⤷ ynshit 🙂

⤷ oliviarodrighoe how did you even find out

⤷ ynshit HE TOLD ME BCUZ HE’S LIKE A SHIT LIAR (thank you very much)

reneewrap did you hire him anyways

⤷ ynshit yes… MAN IS RICHER THAN ME THO

⤷ oliviarodrighoe HAHAHAHAHAHA

⤷ ynshit fuck you

⤷oliviarodrighoe or…

⤷ ynshit STOP

august 3, 2023

charles_jpg

yn.yln has requested to follow you. 4d

confirmed | decline

— instagram notification!

• yn.yln has followed charles_jpg and charles_leclerc!

charles.jpg

liked by yn, lando.jpg, and 7 others

charles.jpg Thank you, Lewis for the camera 😘

view all 10 comments

lewis.jpg Anytime mate! yn yes, thank you lewis hamilton

[liked by charles.jpg]

august 3, 2023

ynswife

liked by 10,483 others

ynswife what do you MEAN yn followed charles leclerc on his main AND jpg acc which NO ONE ELSE BUT THE GRID AND HIS FAMILY FOLLOWS. view all 3,485 comments

ynsferrari bro has been liking all of yns posts since 2015 with that acc 😭😭😭😭

august 3, 2023

yn.yln

tagged: charles_leclerc liked by charles_leclerc, and 14,393,292 others

yn.yln belgium 🤍 got a special guy with us too

view all 3,696,607 comments

charles_leclerc Sooo excited for this month! ⤷ yn.yln bring it on, perceval;)

maxverstappen1 🎉

taylorswift Gorgeous! ⤷ yn.yln i told u guys that song was abt me

august 3, 2023

charles_leclerc

tagged: yn.yln liked by yn.yln, and 2,293,596 others

charles_leclerc London 😎📷

view all 583,797 comments

yn.yln youre so talented, perceval:,) you make me like my smile

⤷charles_leclerc Haha thank you, ynn. You have an pretty smile to begin with! ⤷ lestappen1661 I can hear the church bells

charles1166 no because the way charles always captures her best moments like the happiness in the first slide and how she’s literally a star on the 2nd 😭

august 6, 2023

FERR4RI.YLN

liked by 3,282 others

FERR4RI.YLN “you make my like my smile” “you have a pretty smile to begin with” OH ITS OVER FOR US

view all 27 comments

ylnleclerc MOM AND DAD

august 6, 2023

yn.yln

tagged: charles_leclerc

liked by charles_leclerc, scuderiaferrari, and 7,383,494 others

yn.yln my turn to jpg 🤭

view all 3,585,922 comments

charles_leclerc Loving the first slide ❤️

⤷ yn.yln thanks!

oliviarodrgio ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🩹❣️❤️💗💟😘

⤷ yn.yln fuck off. f1rraris yn sitting with charles on the plane😭 his whipped smile😭 them eating together😭 the heart emoji😭

august 8, 2023

yn.updated

liked by 18,493 others

yn.updated yn sings unreleased song “slut” at monaco soundcheck today?!?! some lyrics :

• “got love struck, went straight to my head”

• “and if they call me a slut you know if might be worth it for once”

• “everyone wants him that was my crime”

• “i break down then he’s pulling me in. in a world of boys, he’s a gentleman”

view all 4,586 comments

chleclercs bye. august 10, 2023

yn.yln

liked by charles_leclerc, and 9,193,492 others

yn.yln monacoooo!!! thanks for being so kind to me and charles:,)

august 10, 2023

yn.yln

monaco

liked by charles_leclerc, and 11,737,292 others

yn.yln a day in shark lerklerk’s life

view all 4,697,922 comments

lewishamilton shark lerklerk

⤷ maxverstappen1 shark lerklerk

⤷ fernandoalo_oficial shark lerklerk

⤷ pierregasly shark lerklerk

⤷ landonorris shark lerklerk

charles_leclerc 🤦‍♂️

⤷ yn.yln💆🏼‍♀️

cru3lsumma entering gf yn time.

august 11, 2023

ynshit

liked by oliviarodrighoe, and 8 others

ynshit this isnt funny im ac down bad. ITS BEEN LIKE 10 DAYS

view all 6 comments

oliviarodrighoe MATCHMAKER ERA 🙋‍♀️

august 11, 2023

sharkie !!❤️

ynn💗

sharkie! wana dinner 2nite 🎉

sharkie !!❤️

Of course! Where should I pick you up? :)

ynn💗

my my what a gentleman

at the hotel we’re staying in🤷🏻‍♀️

sharkie !!❤️

see you:)

ynshit

liked by 11 others

ynshit HE LET ME EAT IN HIS CAR. …… 🙂

view all 32 comments

laufey oh she’s whipped! oliviarodrighoe LALALALALALAL HELLO?

august 11, 2023

charles_leclerc

liked by 7,282,595 others

view all 1,201,833 comments

charlec11 the random an posting no caption is so bf

yn.yln wait. why do i look snatched here.

⤷ charles_leclerc You most certainly are ;)

⤷ f1111zoom HOLD TH E PHONEZ

august 15, 2023

yn.yln

liked by charles_leclerc, and 15,393,393 others

yn.yln little ep out now:)

[ COMMENTS DISABLED ]

august 22, 2023

charles_leclerc

liked by 21,383,696 others

charles_leclerc Might as well be worth it for once❤️

view all 5,707,707 comments

yn.yln thanks for the last pic, love 🧘‍♀️

yn.yln STOPP IM GOING TO MISS YOU FOR TOUR

⤷ charles_leclerc you could always come to the pasdock😘

⤷ yn.yln WAGGING HERE I COME

august 25, 2023

#f1 imagines #formula 1 #charles leclerc #social media au #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc fanfic #f1 fanfic #charles leclerc 16 #charles leclerc imagine

[ssparksflyy]

heyyy can i pls get a rachel elizabeth dare x fem! reader ? maybe in which the reader finds some drawings of her in rachel's sketchbook (you know, artist in love)

p.s: im working in your request <3

ask and thou shall recieve ༉‧₊˚.

draw me like one of your french girls ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.

pairing: rachel elizabeth dare x fem!reader summary : your girlfriend has always proudly shown you all her artwork, or so you thought warning(s) : none! just fluff ♡ word count : 1.4k a/n : hihi! tysm for requesting! i hope this fits what u imagined :DD also best believe i took inspo from ghostflower to make thisss AND ik it says rachel lives in the oracle's CAVE but like nah lemme give me girl a flippin cabin omg 😭

at this point, it was just routine for you to head to rachel's cabin after activities.

your last activity of the day before dinner was arts and crafts. you found it funny, how you'd spend around an hour or so trying to paint the simplest thing, fail, and then head to rachel's, only to find her painting the next mona lisa.

that made you all the more impressed and appreciative of rachel's artwork. some days, she'd be in her 'painters trance' and you'd just watch her paint. you found yourself in your own trance, watching her simply glide the paintbrush across the canvas and manage to create a masterpiece. forget davinci, picasso, or van gogh. rachel was your favorite artist.

today, in arts and crafts, you had experimented with clay. you managed to sculpt out a pretty good-looking strawberry. you planned to give it to rachel later, after all, they were her favorite fruit. she loved taking you on walks through the strawberry fields, holding your hand and smiling the whole time.

after arts and crafts had ended, you hugged your friends goodbye and began to descend into the woods, to rachel's cabin.

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.

once you arrived at rachel's cabin, you climbed the steps that led up to the door and knocked on it. you took a step back, waiting for a response, but it didn't come. you frowned and looked around on the porch. near the door, rachel had enough room for a chair and a small side table on the porch. on the side table lay a note, in rachel's handwriting,

"hi love! im out getting flowers right now, i've got this super cool idea i want to try! the door's unlocked, so just let yourself in :) i should be back soon ♡♡

xoxo, rachel ♡

p.s. if you're not (y/n), then dont go in. sit on the chair. ill get to it when i get to it."

you smiled at the letter, you couldn't help but laugh at the way rachel's mood changes when not talking to you, even in writing. you left the note on the table, just in case somebody did need rachel and would have to wait on the chair.

you opened the door and walked into rachel's cabin, closing it behind you. you walked to her windows, opening the curtains and allowing the natural light to illuminate her room. rachel had told you about how much she'd preferred natural light or lamps, but never a main room light. she said they were too eye-straining and preferred the yellow-ish light that came from the sun and lamps.

after opening her windows, you looked around the room, eyes searching for something to do. you spotted one of rachel's sketchbooks on her desk. one you hadn't seen before.

'it must be new' you thought, walking over to her desk. you sat in her chair and gently placed your strawberry sculpture on the desk. you looked at the sketchbook, it was white and covered in heart stickers, you'd never seen this book before.

now, rachel always allowed you to look at her work. she'd always smile whenever she saw you lying in her bed, flipping through one of her many sketchbooks. she always said she didn't mind you going through and looking at her artwork, it made her happy.

so surely it was the same case for this book? but you'd never seen it before, and it did look pretty used. oh well, if you were a cat, curiosity definitely would've killed you in all 9 lives.

nothing could've prepared yourself for what you saw next. you expected to see the book full of prophecies, scenery, characters from rachel's favorite shows, doodles, not yourself.

you let out a small gasp when you opened the book, immediately met with a gorgeous drawing of you smiling (in like this pose ♡). the drawing was surrounded with small hearts and stars, and of course, rachel's signature near the bottom.

as you flipped through the pages you admired each drawing. rachel had seriously done such an amazing job on these drawings, you were amazed. as you continued to look through the book, you couldn't help but smile. with each turning page, your heart would flutter. the little person in your head was jumping around doing cartwheels saying 'ohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh'.

you could've stared at the book for hours. around midway through however, your admiration had been interrupted.

you jumped up when you heard the door open, with a smiling rachel coming in behind her. as she came into the room, one of her arms holding dozens of flowers she said, "hey! sorry i wasn't here, but look at all the pretty flowers i-"

her sentence was brought to a halt when you turned in her chair, her sketchbook in hand. you had a soft smirk on your face, making sure she could see what you were holding.

she dropped the flowers that were once in her hand, her face immediately turning a bright shade of pink. the sides of her ears were turning red, the same way they always did when she was flustered. her lips were pressed into a thin line, unmoving. the poor girl seemed to be in too much of a shock to say anything.

but she didn't need to. slowly, you got up out of her chair, still holding the book in your hands, and began to walk towards her. you stopped right in front of her and squatted down to pick up a handful of flowers she had dropped. as you got back up, you met her eyes. they were full of panic. you simply smiled and handed her the book. she quickly grabbed it and shut it closed.

you let out a small laugh, rachel remained silent and flustered. you crouched down to pick up the rest of the flowers rachel had dropped.

"you know, im impressed you were able to draw all those poses with no references," you said, walking towards her desk and placing down the flowers. you then turned around and said, "you could've told me you needed a model."

rachel stayed frozen. you didn't think she'd be this embarrassed but you had to admit, it was funny. just then a great idea hit you. you began to walk over her bed and said, "i think i'd make a pretty good model right?" you asked, smirking. rachel's head followed your every move, but the rest of her body remained frozen in space, clutching the sketchbook tightly to her chest.

you sat down on rachel's bed and said, "i mean i've learnt from the best" you began to lay down on your side, resting your head on the pillow. you dramatically raised your hands to the side of your head like rose had in titanic as you said in an exaggerated wistful voice, "jack, draw me like one of your french girls".

this caused rachel to finally leave her state of shock, and instead slide her hand down her face, and covering her mouth. you put your hands down and laughed as she walked over to you with heavy steps. she kneeled down next to her bed so your faces would be the same level.

you smiled and moved your head to the edge of the bed, just inches away from hers.

"im sorry" rachel said, looking down at the sketchbook in her hands.

you furrowed your eyebrows, "for what?", you asked.

"for drawing you so much. i know it's weird" she said eyes focused on the book.

"hey look at me" you said, moving your face slightly closer to hers, "i love them. you're seriously so talented and im so glad i get to be the person who inspires your art. ok?"

rachel nodded slowly with a smile. you gave her a grin in return.

you placed a small kiss on her lips and rolled over on her bed, making room for her. "alright now cmere jack", you said.

she let out a small laugh and climbed into her bed. she wrapped her arms around your waist and rested her head in the crook of your neck, holding you close.

you began playing with her hair, wrapping her curls around your fingers. you both laid there in silence, just enjoying each other's company.

"hey (y/n)?" rachel said.

"yea?" you responded.

"i love you."

"i love you too rach." you said, smiling.

a/n pt.2: hii! i hope this is what you were looking for! <3 i love the whole artist in love :( need me someone to draw me like on of their french girls :( except can i not be butt-ass naked thanks

ANYWAY yea again, hope u enjoyed! tysm for reading and requesting! im almost done with all my asks and then i'll write some ideas i wrote down <33 ok, bye! hope u have a good day/night, likes and reblogs are always appreciated!

peace from manhattan,

percy jackson

#percy jackson #percy jackson x reader #pjo #pjo x reader #heroes of olympus #percy jackon and the olympians #rachel elizabeth dare #rachel elizabeth dare x reader #rachel dare x reader #by bells ♡⋆ ࣪.

[glitterjay]

sunghoon + masturbating (adding on)

it took you a long time to find out what was on your cardigan, only now realizing that the white substance was sunghoon's cum. of course you were a little flustered, and definitely surprised. after school, most of the building was empty. only a few afterschool programs going on. throughout the building, you were looking for sunghoon, eventually finding him alone in one of the classrooms.

you decided to get some payback, walking into the classroom and shutting the door behind yourself and making sure it was closed tightly so no one can come in. hearing your footsteps, he turns around only to see you and looks surprised. (i can just imagine his cute eyes widening- ehrasfdfjhs!!)

"what're you still doing here? i thought you were dismissed a long time ago.." he said in confusion, about to stand up but he sat still, watching you come closer. "i was looking for you" you reply back and stop in front of him.

"can you explain what was on my cardigan when you gave it back? don't tell me you seriously put your cum on my cardigan and forgot about it." of course, you confront him. he starts stuttering and trying to make an excuse, but you quickly shut him up. a hand on his thigh and the other on his shoulder.

the next thing he knows, you're on your knees between his legs, lips wrapped around his sensitive tip and licking it. just like how he imagined. your scent fills his lungs as he muffles his moans into your cardigan. your pretty mouth felt so nice around him, and he was already spilling his hot seed down your throat, his hand on the back of your head and hesitantly pushing it forward, making you gag on his dick. the sight before him was never forgotten, and it was pretty fun for you so you developed the routine of giving him the best head ever every week.

-T

(it's so fun to write these.. i hope you don't mind me spamming you hehe- i love your acc fr <3)

STOP IR IM LOVING THIS SO MUCH

i can imagine his fucked out expression from all the feelings at once, and tbh, the embarrassment he felt when you confronted him turned him on. IM SURE OF IT. also his shocked expression is a turn on like come on now. you did that and expected it to go your way? not so smart of you babe

and and and his hips would buck up on their own because he’s been waiting for this moment for so long he cant control himself UGH i love it

pls keep spamming my ask, you’re always welcome to do so! hard hours are always open for this boys <3 and thank you! im trying my best here, i dont think im a good writer so i do need motivation hehe

#kpop #kpop smut #hard hours #enhypen smut #enhypen #engene #enhypen sunghoon #sunghoon smut #enhypen sunghoon smut #park sunghoon smut #park sunghoon

[sagezere]

I couldn’t find the words to say ‘I love you’.

omg guys its finally a part 3 😱 Finally got inspo to write sorry for the longest wait ever lmao

part 1 here. part 2 here. extra but also kinda important here.

It’s been months. You haven’t spoken to Mona or Scaramouche at all since you caught them in ‘the act’. Honestly it sent shivers of disgust all over your body.

You walked in the halls of your college- even though you shared the same one with both the people that you used to call ‘friends’ you thankfully havent seen them at all.

Taking out your phone and scrolling through anything to clear your mind of the nuisances that you foolishly allowed to be by your side for years, you bumped shoulders with someone.

“Ah, sorry I should have been looking where I was going” you turn around and say apologetically, not expecting to see the man that has been plaguing your mind for this long.

He turned, glared at you for a few seconds before the glare faltered. Both of your eyes stayed connected and the tug of your heart hurt so bad, but you just took a deep breath, blinked at him with the blankest face you could muster, turned and walked away.

And God, did that feel good- that was until you felt a grab at your shoulder, and you were pulled back slightly.

“(Name)…” His voice whispered out, but you didn’t want to turn. You shrugged his hand off of you, and turned your head slightly, just to get that look on his face and you glared.

“Don’t fucking speak to me. You chose to do what you did, so just do what you always wanted me to do and fuck off.” Then you finally walked away from him- with an aching heart of course, but it was finally a step forward. With every step away from him it felt like you could finally breathe, like you could finally feel the weight of all those years slide off and far away.

—

Going about your day, it’s only been about an hour or two since bumping into Scaramouche in the hall. You were so happy to have finally let go of such a burden- having finally broken a promise you’ve made to a ‘dead person’ (if ur confused read the prequel thing or just dont idk)

However happiness was cut abruptly when you were faced with the other half of the nuisance, Mona. You were unsure of your standings with her, she seemed to only be your friend when Scaramouche wasn’t in the picture, but she’d also treat you as if you were some gross bug when he was around.

Seeing her stand in front of you so casually as if she hadn’t just ghosted you for some boy made you pissed off.

“(Name)! It’s been so long, how’ve you been?” The casualty in her voice and actions towards you start irritating you. You give her a disgusted look.

“what the hell are you talking about? ‘(Name) it’s been so long, how’ve you been?’ “ You mock her words in an overly high pitched and obnoxious voice.

“You ghosted me Mona. Don’t come skipping back expecting me to be the same (Name) I was months ago- actually scratch that, I’m pretty grateful.” You cross your arms and look her in the eyes with a glare.

“(Name) look I’m sorry-“ You cut her off.

“shut up and let me speak for fucks sake.” You rolled your eyes, not letting her speak over you.

“You went no contact on me, blocked me from literally everything! Kind of glad you did that for me though, with you and your bitch of a boyfriend out of my life for all those months I realized how fake you are!”

When she opened her mouth to speak- or defend herself you just walked away, not wanting to even hear any more of her voice.

—

yeah sorry this is kinda shit, but like if any of u wanna take inspo or kinda remake this and my other fics into something else just feel free. I honestly meant to keep the first fic as just that, but ppl wanted a part 2 so I made the part 2 and then ppl wanted a part 3 and I was just like ‘damn wth do i do now’ so yeah. Thanks for reading 😭❤️

#scaramouche x reader angst #scaramouche angst #scaramouche x reader #genshin impact #genshin impact scaramouche #x reader #kunikuzushi #kunikuzushi x reader

[diacripticcomplex]

Can I request a yandere ayato x yui please? It doesn’t have to be a smut fic but if it is I’m fine either way, thanks (love your writing btw)

Ayato's POV:

I can't think or eat normally, staying away from her might be the only guarantee for her safety. She keeps on trying and trying to get my attention, putting herself in dangerous situations on purpose, she knows that shit pisses me off. All I can think of is her, her deep velvet eyes and the sadness she bears, her creamy skin that I taint with my fangs and her sweet hot blood that quenches my thirst. I know that if this continues I will end up killing her, if she did not mean anything to me I would not give a shit but she means the world to me, I want to slaughter anyone who gets in our way. These bastard Mukami assholes, my brothers, my uncle I dont care..they should all just drop dead, every human ballsack looking guy should die too...she belongs to me, and only me, no one will have her but me. Fuck! Ha, I think I am going insane, I never wanted it to get this bad. I don't want to leave her alone, I want her next to me at all times but I might actually kill her if that is the case..the thought of not being by her side at all times that shit doesn't sit right with me, I don't like the idea of her interacting with anyone but me..

That night, I took a bunch of percs, after thinking it through I decided to slaughter everyone in our path, I started with my lurking Uncle Richter, his presence only made matters worse but killing him was the most challenging, I tore him to pieces limb by limb, then I hurried over to those Mukami bastards, I sniffed 3 lines of cocaine before torturing the those subbreed bastards. Azusa and Kou were easy to kill, I didn't waste my time torturing them, but Ruki's death was to be slow, I wanted to enjoy his agony, cutting out his tongue so I don't have to hear his annoying voice, perhaps I'll cook his tongue and feed it to her..after a few hours of torturing him in front of Yuma I slice his throat and decapitated his head, as well as the other Mukami brothers, I wanted to take their heads and put them on spikes as decorations around the manor, a warning to my brothers, who indeed were next.

After a few more lines of cocaine I was in a frenzy, I decorated the manor gates with their heads. I went back into the manor, she was standing there in horror. "What have you done..!?" she asks in panic and worry, tears in her eyes as she looks away from the sight. I grab her face and make her look at it. "They were in the way, anyone who gets in my way will meet the same fate." I tell her, smiling like a madman probably, she gives me a look of fear, that look does it for me, I kiss her, she resists the kiss, so I pull away and whisper to her "you're not content until they are all gone right? Don't worry, I'll make your wish come true." I told her, my eyes were gleaming into her, that cocaine had me jittery. "No no I dont want anyone else to die.." she makes her pleas, pretending to be this good human and all that crap. "Make no mistake, if I wasn't here these bastards would do as they wish with you, you want that?" I ask her, gripping onto her shoulder blades, she shakes her head then continues to try and defend them I heard enough come from her mouth, I bite her lips, sucking the blood from there until they turn all purple, she passes out after a few moments so I take her into my room and lock her in there, she will wake up to a lovely present.

I took a few more percs, and sniffed the remaining cocaine I had, killing Shu, Reiji and Subaru would be more of a challenge, Laito would expect this and Kanato would be a bitch about it, I'll kill Laito and Kanato quickly, we shared a womb I have to make it a clean and swift death for them. “Ah Ayato, you’ve come to kill me, you’re getting a bit mes-“ Laito began to say but I sliced his head off, Kanato as well, I took their bodies outside and set it a blaze, the fire crackled loudly, this caused Reiji to come out. “Ayato have you lost your mind?!” He went on, I shoved my fingers deep into his eye sockets and tore out his eyeballs, crushing them in my hand, then I pushed Reiji into the fire. I’ve wanted to do that for a long time. “..what the fuck have you done..?!” Shu, lazy dull bastard commented, “ha, shu aren’t you scared of fire? I’ll rip your heart out instead” I tell him and yank it out his chest then throw his heart into the fire, his body goes limb and he falls, I burn him too, all that was left was Subaru. He must be hiding.

I began searching the mansion, I made a turn from my room and saw Subaru holding his dagger up to her throat. “Ayato you’ve gone insane, try to kill me and I’ll kill her” he says pressing his dagger to her skin, something in me jolted, I was mad with bloodlust, I did not think, I simply snatched Yui and had her in my grasp now. “She’s mine! Ill fucking kill you, don’t ever touch her again.” I state, I tear off her clothes right in front of Subaru, and start groping her breasts, she tries to cover herself, I grip her wrists so tightly it felt as if her blood circulation would stop, I force my way into her, one hand on her neck, my member deeply in her, she cried and protested the entire time but I wanted Subaru to understand, that I will kill to get what I want, and she is what I want.

#diabolik lovers #diabolik boys #dialovers #yui komori #diabolik brothers #diahell #shu sakamaki #smut #ayato sakamaki #sakamaki subaru #smut diabolik lovers #smut fiction #yandere #reiji sakamaki #laito sakamaki #kanato sakamaki #mukami brothers #oneshot #ayayui #ayato x you #yui x ayato

[slasher-male-wife]

Hi new hc idea. Thomas hewitt, bubba swayer and og hannibal if you write for him if not nbc hannibal x male reader that is okay with them Killing and also with eating the special meat, juste dosent want to be involve in the "hunt". Dont forgot, take your time and dont overwork yourself and i hope you have a good day/night <3 (notice me if you dont take the request <3 )

I'd love to do this for you. I'm sorry for taking so long to get to this. I've talked about stuff that's been going on but now that my school is almost over I'll be hopefully posting more. I also have some OC stuff I'm interested in posting so look out for that.

Cannibal slashers with an s/o who's ok with eating human meat

Includes: Bubba Sawyer, Thomas Hewitt and Nbc Hannibal Lecter

Warnings: Murder, Cannibalism, talk of following traditional gender roles (barely)

Bubba Sawyer

He's a little surprised at how comfortable you are with eating human meat right away, but he's happy that you're doing it. Since you're so comfortable with eating human meat there aren't going to be too many issues for awhile.

Since you're so comfortable with eating human meat Drayton will probably ask you to help in the kitchen from time to time. If you don't know how to cook you'll learn from him. But if you don't want to handle the meat that's fine, he'll find something else for you to do.

Bubba is a little disapointed that you're not comfortable with killing people but he kind of understands because he assumes your reason are like Draytons. As long as you don't get in the way of their killing he's fine with you not participating.

If you just don't want to be around all of the screaming and intense situations of "the hunt" Bubba will find a way to keep you occupied outside or somewhere where you won't hear all of the noise.

Thomas Hewitt

Like with Bubba it's a good thing you're fine with eating human meat. His family might not believe that you're actually comfortable with eating human meat until you prove to them that you are.

It's also a good thing that you're fine with all of the killing. The more accepting you are of what the Hewitt do the more pleasant they'll be, at least as pleasant as they can be with other people.

Since you don't want to participate in the hunt or the killing Thomas will keep you out of the basement unless it's necessary for you to be down there or it's cleaned up.

Also I'd assume if you're a woman/ fem presenting the family will expect you to help in the kitchen, Hoyt more than anyone else will expect that but if you're bad with cooking they'll make sure you don't cook.

Hannibal Lecter

He'll wait awhile before breaking the news to you that he's been feeding you human meat, unless you figure it out on your own. But he's happy that you're not against continuing to eat human meat.

Hannibal will talk more openly about his cannibalism with you and ask you how different meats taste to you. He could go on four hours about his different preparation for different parts of the body.

He always does his killing for food by himself so you'll never have to worry about him asking you to join him on the hunt. He may ask you about rude people that you've encountered lately and such but he's never asking you to join him in killing someone.

He's also thankful you're not against him killing people. If you don't ask about him killing people then he won't tell you about the details. But if you're interested in the details then he's happy to talk about them with you.

#slasher x y/n #slasher x reader #slasher fanfiction #bubba sawyer x y/n #bubba saywer x reader #thomas hewitt x reader #thomas hewitt x y/n #thomas hewitt x you #hannibal lecter x you #hannibal x reader #hannibal nbc

[undercoverpena]

my 2023 tumblr top 10

WARNING: I’m going to be mushy about my writing, and celebrate me, if this isn’t for you, scroll past. kindness only. 

1. 2,541 notes - Nov 18 2023

BE GOOD, BE QUIET 

joel miller x f!reader (tlou) 

i’m so blown away by the love this fic got!! this silly idea of a storm, of joel, and here we are. it was the fingers in your mouth wasn’t it... i knew it.

2. 2,495 notes - Mar 27 2023

ABOUT SOMEONE, THAT ISN’T YOU

simon ‘ghost’ riley x f!reader (cod) 

this was such a blast to write, and i still can’t believe a little whump fic from me did so well!! i will say one of my fave lines ever is this: He finds you in the centre of dust and debris. 

3. 2,339 notes - Apr 23 2023

AREPAS

javier peña x f!reader (narcos)

my baby. the fic i’ve re-read the most. my beloved. i remember posting this after a mammoth 6 hour editing sessions of it because dyslexia, and then the relief. i went to sleep, woke up, and was like omfg. 

4. 2,155 notes - Jul 31 2023

CAN YOU IMAGINE...

simon ‘ghost’ riley x f!reader (cod) 

this was purely me being up far too late, and just being a mush, that then turned spicy. it should be expected now, but then, in july, it was all new for me. 

5. 1,662 notes - Jun 9 2023

LATE NIGHT TEXTS SERIES 

javier peña x f!reader (narcos)

arepas walked, so LNT could RUN. gosh. this fic. the last couple of days it has so much love too, and i’m so overwhelmed, and happy. but my fave thing about this, it all stemmed from a scene in my head of him picking her up from the airport, combined with the fact i was alone for a week, and here we are. one of my fave things i’ve ever written.

6. 1,634 notes - Feb 26 2023

TAKE ME TO YOURS 

javier peña x f!reader (narcos)

stemmed from a prompt, this was meant to be a short thing that quickly got away from me. it was one of the first things i wrote for this man, and i still have so much love for it. the scene of him seeing her in the room, god.... 

7. 1,612 notes - Sep 17 2023

YOU SHOULD BE MY ONLY GIRL

joel miller x f!reader (tlou) 

so this fic is a firm fave for me, because not only was it for my cheese ( @thetriumphantpanda ), but also i had the chance to have @perotovar ‘s work on my fic too. like still, i can’t believe how fortunate i am. i still love this one so freaking much. the stress of me worrying if it was good enough though, didn’t love that so much. 

8. 1,564 notes - Jan 3 2023

DON’T 

john price x f!reader (cod) 

this was the most ridiculously brilliant thing, because i wrote it in a chat to my friend @guyfieriii and she was like POST THIS. and i did, and here we are. to this day, price is still someone i dont feel confident writing, but i will admit this was alright ;)

9. 1,484 notes - Jul 15 2023

CIRCLES AND SQUARES

simon ‘ghost’ riley x f!reader (cod) 

sometimes, some of my best works are when i write them for people, and writing this for mothie was a joy. i also can’t believe how much ghost is in my top ten. 

10. 1,357 notes - Aug 29 2023

HOME AND THE GHOST MUG 

simon ‘ghost’ riley x f!reader (cod) 

this might have been the last thing i wrote for cod before leaving the fandom entirely, and again, i was up far too late, moving a mug of my husband’s, and here is the product of it. 

Created by TumblrTop10

#tumblrtop10 #jo's thoughts

[romana-after-dark]

The Wrong Way (Dark Ending): Going Under, Part 2

Raider!Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Raider!Tommy Miller x Fem!Reader

Spotify Playlist

Summery: After you give birth to Ellie in the cabin, Joel fins you and Tommy, besting Tommy in a fight. What happens to you? What happens to Ellie, Tommy, Lorenzo and the rest of the family Little One has acquired? How does Little One learn to cope with her new reality? Does she fall into the darkness that surrounds Joel and all he touches? Can Joel really change for you and your daughter?

WARNINGS FOR FULL FIC, NOT CHAPTER BY CHAPTER UNLESS SOMETHING NEW IS ADDED AFTER MASTER WARNING LIST: DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT!!!! Fic contains graphic depictions of sexual assault, rape, molestation, dubcon/non con. MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH WARNING, graphic violence, murder, manipulation, the horrors, Joel being Joel, Tommy being kinda pathetic, Joel's weird sexual fantasies, breeding kink, abuse of power. Just.... all the bad.

Extra on the executions. Suicidal ideation. Sorry, I should've put tjat in the warnings first chapter but I just came up, so this is your warning now. Im tryingto think of all the hardest stuff that happens now so I can warn ahead of time but sometimes it just happens while writing you know? Things come up. Dont say i didnt want you with major character death

a/n who watched Avatar TLA growing up? There a reference to it at the very end.... that episode traumatized me

*******************

It had been four days before Joel came and got you. The room was cold from the cool outside air; it was far from freezing, only a crisp Wyoming early fall so far. This had proven a benefit, despite the way you shivered under tattered blankets, as it aired out the bucket of piss and shit that was your toilet.

Ellie had to be dead by now. Infants need to be fed regularly, every 2-3 hours according to Maura… your breasts hurt, they hurt so fucking bad sometimes you cried from just that… but it wasn’t a hard leap from your depressed mindset. The pain was aching and you had to squeeze the milk out of your engorged breasts just to have a little relief. Your vagina hurt, too. Luckily you had stopped bleeding, although you wished you’d just bleed out already. Everything was pain and your dreams in the few moments you were sleeping were filled with nightmares.

You weren’t sure what you were living for. You laid on the mattress hour after hour, staring at the broken glass from your fit, thinking you could easily kill yourself… The only thing that stopped you was the effort it would require. Dazed, almost… that was the best way to describe it, all the hours blurring together

Honestly, you hadn't expected Joel to return at all. You figured he killed Ellie or just let her starve, killed Tommy and would just let you waste away in this god forsaken room, the room where so much happened.

Tommy taking your virginity after you begged him, playing go fish for hours.

Joel raping you, loving you, cuddling you.

Nick.

When he walked into the room, you didn’t even look up. You didn’t have the energy anymore. When his strong arms scooped you up, leading you out of the piss-smelling room, you instinctively wrapped your arms and legs around him like before… it had been habit at this point, after a year of doing this and you were no stranger to your body betraying you.

Joel, in turn, held you close. “Just look what you’ve done, hermosa… but it’s okay, we can fix it.”

“No” you whine, head in the crook of his neck. Why was his smell comforting after all that had happened? “We can’t fix this.” Your baby is gone, after all you did to try and save her.

“Yes, yes we can, you just gotta be good.” Of course Joel thought this was fixable. Ellie was only ever his replacement for Sarah, so she was replaceable herself. Joel would put a baby in you again and if it was a boy? Another one. And another, and another until you died, then he’d move onto the next vulnerable young girl.

Joel took you outside. When you saw the raiders all surrounding the yard, a yard that had previously been your comfort, a place you imagined your baby playing, you figured this is where he killed you. You were ready.

“Watch her” And he went into the house. The sunshine and fresh air felt nice, you had to admit. When he returned, he carried a little bundle; the baby blanket Mrs. Munoz knitted, with Ellie’s little face barely peeking out.

“ELLIE!” Joy and sunshine filled your heart again, and suddenly nothing else matter than the fact your daughter lived. Ecstatic, you dash towards her as all the pain of earlier seeming long gone in your desperate need for her, but Joel wouldn’t let you have it just yet. He moved her out from his firm grasp, still holding her but seemingly threatening to drop her. “JOEL NO!”

“She’s safe, little one, don’t you worry… as long as you behave.” He went back to rocking her, a soft expression as he looked at his daughter.

“H-how is she alive? She didn’t feed, I thought- I thought she was dead!”

“You really think I’d let my daughter starve?” His voice was condescending, a slight scoff at the end. “C’mon now, you can’t be that stupid. I know there's not a lot going on in that bimbo housewife brain of yours but I thought you had a little more faith in you than this.” He was… he was laughing at you. All the things he did to you, all the things he’s said… why did this hurt so bad? Joel never called you stupid before… and didn’t he… he threatened to hurt her just a moment ago, didn’t he? Or did he? Maybe you were reading into it too much…

“I’m not… I’m not stupid.” Defensively, you spoke but your eyes remained on your daughter.

“Oh, of course not, sweet girl, of course not.” Was he making fun of you? Why were the other men chuckling? “But I had a plan incase you couldn’t produce milk. I’ve got a freezer full of breast milk from other women, and even some formula. It’s expired but, it’ll do in a pinch.”

As relieved as you were about Ellie living, guilt punched at you. “You… Joel, you took milk away from hungry babies?”

Joel rolled his eyes. “No, of course not. Mrs. Little Feather was producing an abundance so I paid her well for a stash, just in case. I’ll always protect my family” He turned to one of the men and nodded.

Tommy was pushed out the house, hands bound behind him and he was shoved to the ground.

“TOMMY!” But you didn’t dare move, not when Joel had Ellie.

“Honey, fuck, I’m sorry, I-” He was cut off by Joel kicking him in the stomach. Tommy’s left hand was bandaged up from the stabbing. 

But Tommy’s reveal wasn’t even the worst. Out of the house came  Zach and Lorenzo, bound and gagged, quickly followed by the biggest shock yet. June. It had been a whole year since you’d seen her, never even saying goodbye when you were ripped away from your family. The four of them knelt on the ground, hands tied behind their backs, Lorenzo and Zach at one end of the yard, Tommy and June behind them. Joel shoved you towards Zach and Lorenzo, the guards taking off their mouth gags.

Zach yelled your name. “Run!” But Lorenzo knew better. Lorenzo knew there was no running from Joel, and there was no leaving Ellie behind. You stumble towards them, taking them in your arms. Joel was going to kill them.

“I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry…” You sob, knowing this was because of you.

“Sweetheart.” Lorenzo’s voice called to you, oddly calm given the circumstances. “Sweetheart, look at me.” He waited until you looked him, Lorenzo’s large, brown, droopy eyes calming you the way they always did. “It’s okay. Zach and I… we’ve already made peace with this. It’s gonna be okay.”

“No it’s not!” You protest. “He’s gonna kill you both we will have NOTHING!”

Zach. “You’ll have Dolli.” You look to your big brother. “And I know it’s hard, and I know it’s shit right now, honey it’s shit, but you can’t leave her with Joel, okay? So you gotta do this. Think of mom, think of all she did so we could survive.”

A fresh bout of tears. You sniffle, smelling the grass and the dirt and the filth surrounding you. “But I can’t.” You sob violently. You can’t do this without help, you never could. 

“You can-”

“I’m not strong!”

Lorenzo. “You’ve already been strong, always. You survived a lifetime of hell and you put up a hell of a fight, again and again. You’re gonna raise Dolly to be strong like you, okay?”

Ellie. Ellie needed you. Nothing else mattered but her. “Her name… her name Ellie. Joel chose Dolly, I chose Ellie June.”

Zach smiled. “Ellie June. I love it.”

“Your goddaughter, Zach.”

He nodded. “I’ll keep an eye on her, I promise. We both will.”

Joel steps up, still holding Ellie close to his chest with his left hand. “Alright, ‘nuff talk’n”

“No, Joel, please!” You desperately cling to your brothers, a feeble attempt to save their lives when you feel yourself being picked up by familiar arms; Tommy wrapped a strong arm around your middle pulling you away. “TOMMY LET ME GO!”

Kicking, screaming, fighting, you try to pull off him but your legs dangle, treading air.

“Joel.” Tommy called to his brother. “Dolly’s ears.” He referenced the baby in his arms as Joel pulled out the gun.

“There’s a silencer.”

Horror and anguish as you cry for your family, Lorenzo and Zach both mouthing that they loved you although you couldn’t hear a sound anymore, except the sharp eeeeee and muffled voices. The panic had set it.

Lorenzo and Zach come closer together, their bound up finger intertwining together. Joel strides up the the couple, covers Ellie’s ears with his hand and chest and-

BANG! BANG!

Zach and Lorenzo’s bodies felt limp to the ground, and you didn’t have it in you to scream any more. You went into shock, freezing up and zoning out, only barely aware of Joel comforting Ellie as she cried; no doubt startled from the shooting and commotion. 

Joel spoke to his men, but you weren’t sure what he said… the only thing in your sights was your dead family and he thought that June and Tommy were probably next…wait, when was Tommy untied?

Joel hand grabbed your face and you heard a faint ‘Joel, stop’ but he didn’t. It was the middle of the sentence before you started to understand again. “-are both dead now. Jack is dead, Maura is dead. But her,” He pointed his gun at June, stepping towards her. “She’s alive. Zach tried to take her, thinking it’d save her. Look what good that did huh?”

You couldn’t speak, but Tommy did. “C’mon, man, she’s got nothing to do with this, don’t kill her.”

“Well Thomas, I’m glad you care so much, that’ll make the next part easier.”

“What are you-”

Joel ignored him. “Set her down.” Tommy did. You wobbled a bit but got to your feet, trying to concentrate on behaving… Zach was right, you needed to do this for Ellie. He walked back to you. “See how easily he listens to me? Like a guard dog. Tommy always was good at following orders.” He looked too Tommy again. “Take three steps back.” Tommy did. “Spin around” Tommy rolled his eyes, but did. “Shake you butt”

“Joel-”

“Do it Tommy”

Tommy did, looking humiliated in the process he wiggled his hips.

“Oh come ooooon” Joel laughs. “Put on a show”

“This is humiliating”

“THAT’S THE POINT!” 

You wince at the outburst, wanting to hold Ellie so painfully bad… her little nose was getting runny from the cold, even with a little hat on.

Joel raised the gun to Ellie, and Tommy immidietly complied, shouting at him to knock it off. Jaw set tight, Tommy bent over and stuck out his butt, shaking it to the chuckles of the other men. Tommy fucking Miller, Joel’s previous right hand man. Feared leader, reduced to this indignity… You looked over to June, still bound and gagged and on her knees, looking utterly confused.

“Good job, Tommy” Joel turned back to you. “See how easy it was for Tommy to listen to me? Always been like that, following me around like a lost puppy, desperate for my approval… you know why I untied his hands, little one?” He didn’t wait for your answer. “Because I need you to know he watched. He watched me kill your brother and Lorenzo, he held you back while he watch. He watched me take you, he watched me fuck you on the table, he watched me brand you, and if he had been here last week he would’ve watched as I hung you.”

The whimper from your mouth at the memory is pathetic, but you keep your mouth shut as your eyes cry. 

Joel perked up. It was like a shift, that dramatic change in his personalities that was so hard to keep up with. “So here’s my vision! It’s gonna take a while until we can all trust each other but I want us to all be a family.” He nudged his gun, and one of the men moved to June. Joel must have planned this all out, orchestrated it… He gave the gun to his man, and yanked down June’s gag. It was clear she had been crying heavily, but would not give Joel the dignity of begging for her life. June was strong like that. Sweet, kindhearted; a soft person who was undeniably stubborn. “Beautiful thing, aren’t you. Gonna make such a pretty wife.”

June was too proud to beg, but you’d been long suffering indigities. You had no pride left. “No, no, no, no, no JOEL! Don’t do this, I’ll be good, I promise!”

“Relax, bebita.” He laughed at you. “She’s not for me. You’re the only one for me, you know that right? You gave me my daughter back, you’ll always be my wife, no matter what.”

You were more confused than ever; a cooling breeze rustled your skirt, making you realize just how damn sweaty you’d gotten during all this. “Then what-”

Joel took the collar of June’s shirt, dragging her towards Tommy and throwing her at him as she squeaked in shock. Although he caught her, diving towards her falling body and preventing it from hitting the ground Tommy looked as confused as you did.

“I don’t want-”

“She’s your wife now”

“JOEL!” He held her and June clung to him. “This is insane, I don’t want a wife!”

Uninterested, Joel shrugged him off. “Fuck her, don’t, I don’t really care.” Joel strode towards you again but stopped to look over his shoulder at Tommy. “But knowing you, you probably will. Just a matter of whether you hold her down or not.”

Tommy, for all his weaknesses and flaws… you knew he was not that type of man.

“You and June will live in your old room. She can’t leave the room unsupervised until I say so” He turned to you. “Same with you, little one. But Tommy’s gonna watch you both. Know why?”

Finally, fucking finally, Joel handed you your daughter and you scooped her up, sobbing. “Hey baby, hi. Mommy’s here, yeah, mommy’s here now, it’s okay”

The sun was beginning to set, the shadows of the trees casting long over your dead family. “Because I’m choosing to spare his life, He owes me. And if we can all get along, no more run’n, no more fighting, no more ‘Joel stop!’” he mocked. “Then the 5 of us and whatever other children we’re blessed with can all live together as one big happy family.”

*

Joel sat you between his legs like you always used to after a bath, Ellie in both your arms as he nursed. “Knew you’d fuck up that room, little one. My brave girl. Always so strong, so resilient. You wanted to get to Dolly, didn’t you?”

“Yes” it was the truth, at least. You couldn’t help but feel comfort in Joel’s arms even now… what was wrong with you? Why were you like this? How had he broken you down this badly? “Just… just wanted to be with her…”

“I understand. She’s perfect, isn’t she?”

“Absolutely perfect” and she was, Ellie was everything.

A knock on the door; Joel beckoned them in.

“Watch your fucking eyes.” He snapped at his man bringing you food and water, despite this very man having been there when you were raped in the kitchen… a little breastfeeding wouldn’t had much to the fantasies. 

When Ellie was done, fallen quickly asleep, Joel took her and laid her in her crib before doing what you knew was only inevitable. 

He laid down beside you, handings trailing you body, muttering about much he missed you, how much he missed your body. “My perfect girl…” In gentle whispers, he spoke praises into your mouth between kisses, hand trailing between your legs. You hated your body for responding to him, you hated the way he made you feel so good and you hated how you would kiss him hours after murdering your brother and friend… But Ellie. Ellie is what mattered. Ellie needed to be safe, she needed her mom, and she needed no more of her family dead. So, you kissed Joel. You kissed Joel the way you had kissed Tommy only earlier this week as he swore to you he’d be the father of the child in that crib. Your life with Tommy crumbled down before you, as did any chance of happiness.

“Joel, I haven't bathed in days…” 

“Don’t care, need you”

“Joel it huuurts” You begin to cry, despite knowing that only ever has turned him on more. “Please?” 4 days was not a lot of time to heal, the tearing still evident in you.

Pulling away, Joel looks at you, cupping your face with large, calloused hands. “We need to work together on this, little one. Give a little, get a little. For Dolly.”

Damn him. Damn him and the way he made your stomach burn, damn him and the way his touch felt so good and how you wanted to just be a happy family with him even now… And damn him for knowing how to use Ellie to manipulate you.

“Can we… can we do anal?”

The surprise was evident on his face, bed creaking as he sat up. “You’d prefer to take it in your ass instead of your pussy?”

As you gaze up at him, the concern on his face was clear… oh how he confused you. “I think it would hurt less.”

His features softened as you spoke, laying back down beside you to kiss your neck. “Just focus on my hand right now, sweet girl.” And you did. You did because you were a mess, you were disgusting, you were heartbroken and sad and lonely and you wanted Tommy but you had Joel and he had treated you well didn’t he? Maybe this was survivable… maybe. But you had to please him, and Joel always made you cum. Your pleasure turned him on… so you allowed yourself to sink into the swirling touch of Joel Miller’s fingers.

His touch was gentle but pressing and urgent; patience yet needy, as if making you cum would rebuild the bubble that he had built all those months… and it just might. Your cunt feel empty when it pulses around nothing but you are thankful you are able to get this wet, to orgasm still… The natural lubrication will help with taking his dick up your ass. When the climax was over, you took the chance to relax… it would hurt less if you relaxed.

“Roll over” He ordered, and you did as you were told before Joels straddled your thighs, hands rubbing up and down your mostly-clothes body. “Such a pretty girl… such a perfect girl, and all mine… I don’t care that Tommy fucked this sweet little pussy” Joel reached down to rub your swollen lips. “I don’t care. Once you’re healed up, I’m gonna cum inside you every goddamn day until you give me another baby, gonna fuck a baseball team into you.”

Of course he is. Of course. You wouldn’t expect nothing else from him; he wanted to keep you trapped with him forever… All the love you felt for Ellie was going to multiply tenfold, and you could never, ever leave with that many.

As Joel lined his cock up, swiping it up and down your asscrack and the crease of your thighs, you burry your face in the pillow. Joel wasn’t going to prep you at all, was he? He was going to just fuck you, rip you open and punish you-

“Oh little one… you’ve had a long day, haven't you? Yeah… You’ve been good, I’ll meet you halfway” Joel slid his cock between your plump thighs.

You lift your head off the pillow. “What? What are you doing?”

He began to pump, fucking your thighs and making the bed creak enough you made a mental note to ask Jack to oil it- fuck, Jack was dead, dead because he saw you trying to escape and took you back to Lorenzo. Dead because he went to get Zach to save his life… All of them ended up dead anyway. Jack, Maura, Lorenzo, and my dear brother who had only ever tried to help you. Now June was essentially Tommy’s wife just as you were Joel’s and although you trusted Tommy not to hurt her, she was in a house full of raiders… and Joel.

“Let it out, baby, let it out.” Joel cooed as he thrusted between your legss; one or twice he spit down between them to keep the lubrication going but it wasn’t long before he pulled out, jerking himself as he painted a picture of his cum on your ass and thighs. “Beautiful girl… beautiful.” The cum was like lotion as he rubbed it along you, rubbing your aching muscles… Did he love you? Truly?

When Joel leaves to boil water for the bath, you go to pick up Ellie. You needed her, needed her painfully. You wanted to make up for lost time in those four days she was gone, and away from you; she needed skin to skin, she needed love, she needed her mama’s voice… she needed you.

Joel could hear you from outside the door, peaking through the crack to watch you cuddle his daughter… you were a good mom. You loved Sarah like he did, you cared for her, you wanted the best for her. You just needed to learn, that’s all. Learn that Joel was the only man that mattered, learn that giving Sarah a family with siblings and two loving parents was more important than your own personal feelings. You simple needed to learn that Joel knew what’s best. He’d take care of you, take care of you like he always did; protecting you. He wouldn’t make the mistakes he made with Nick, Tommy, Lorenzo, Jack… Tommy would watch you while he was gone, but he knew Tommy, and Tommy was a simple man. Place a pretty girl in his bed, and it wouldn’t take long before they were fucking, and once Tommy fucked a girl, well… he latched on fast. Probably his mommy issues.

You were so sweet with Dolly, so careful, so attentive… even now, you sang to her and Joel thought this was the only sight he needed to see for the rest of his life: You, freshly fucked and beautiful with Dolly asleep in your arms as you sang.

What Joel didn’t know was your thoughts were consumed by your brother, dead outside with a gunshot in his head. Maybe you could ask him and Lorenzo to be buried together… it was the least you could do for your first protector… your soldier, your guardian who died in vain fighting for your safety after a lifetime of taking your beatings. 

“Leaves from the vine

Falling so slow

Like fragile tiny shells

Drifting in the foam

Little soldier boy

Come marching home

Brave soldier boy

Comes marching home”

The bath after sex felt exactly like it always had.

*******************

YEEEEEEEEEEEESH goodbye Zach and Lorenzo!!! my babies! my favorite couple! (im so sorry fen. I murdered your boy!) Also sorry angela buuuuuuuuuutttt you knew this was happening.

Honestly my heart aches for Zach. I have an older brother who was largly my protector in my childhood, my best friend for so long and I love him lots. Thats who zach is based off of for me but i dont wanna give a faceclaim bc I tryyyyyyy to make little one race inclusive (i know i didn't do perfect with the details of her bruisings but it can be hard) If any of my mutuals wanna see a pic Ill show you XD

Remember when I said taylor russle was June's faceclaim? I lied. I saw a picture of Alisha Boe and was like!!!!!! wait no thats her!!!! so now shes on this header.

JUNE AND TOMMY PLOT TWIST what do we think will happen there??? (June is canon bisexual, so dont let her marrying Maura in ghost of you series throw you off. She's the one who told little one all she really knew about sex.)

PLEASE LEMME KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS AND THEORIES!!!! RBS ARE SO IMPORTANT TO SPREAD WORK but I like you know what you guys are thinkig!!! what part was the hardest to read? what are your thoughts on how this goes? One june and tommy? the deaths of jack and maura as well as tommy and lorenzo? Joel suddenly being very condesending to little one and almost like a schoolyard bully to tommy? all this happening while holding ellie?

He kinda reminds me of Joe Goldberg in You lol carrying Henry around with him on his lil stalking trips

@pimosworld @rubyfruitjungle @moriartyyouwhore @k-ra @the-fox-den @jenna-ortega @alwaysmicado @lunar-ghoulie @ladynightingale @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @maura-honey @fandxmslxt69 @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog

#Joel Miller #Joel Miller smut #tw rape #dub con #non con #dark joel miller #romana after dark #dark!Joel #the last of us hbo #joel miller fic #joel miller reader #joel miller reade smut #dark joel miller reader #tommy miller fem reader #tommy miller smut #tommy miller fem!reader #the wrong way fic #the wrong way series #tommy miller

[rewcana]

do you spend many of your waking hours on social media? do you feel like it's a problem? in this world of late stage capitalism, your time and attention is actively being harvested by big corporations. it's.. not good. it also just makes you feel bad!

here are some tips that have really helped me reduce the amount of time i give to these apps & get in control of my social media addiction:

1. IDENTIFY PROBLEM APPS

you probably know which apps you spend the most time on. however, looking at real data about usage is very helpful because time spent on social media is very deceiving. keep in mind which apps you spend the most time looking at and interacting with for the rest of this list.

2. TURN OFF NOTIFICATIONS

this is probably the easiest thing to do and it makes an immense difference. it's up to your discretion which notifications you want to keep on (turning on messaging notifications but turning off algorithm and interaction notifs for example) but, the most effective way to stay off problem apps is to turn off ALL notifications.

3. TURN OFF NOTIFICATION SOUNDS

i always keep my phone on silent. i understand that not all people have that privilege but, if you're able to i would highly highly recommend. it has helped me a lot with anxieties regarding waiting for notifications. i used to experienced the phantom vibrate and check my phone obsessively when nothing would happen. you can also just turn off notification sounds and vibrations for any non necessity apps if you don't want to jump to turning off all notifications.

4. CHANGE THE PLACEMENT OF PROBLEM APPS

i actually learned this trick from facebook when they changed the UI slightly so you had to be more intentional in interacting with the app. changing the layout of the apps on your phone really helps you catch yourself when you are automatically opening up apps that cost you time and attention. instead of keeping social media apps on the homescreen, keep it on a different screen, in a folder, & if possible out of the preview window for the folder.

if you want to expand on this more, you could keep a log in a notes app of every time you reached for an app that has since moved. you can even put the notes app in its place!

5. UTILIZE APP TIMERS

my experience is based on samsung app timers so i'm not sure how it differs in different makes. i really dont like my phone telling me i can't do something so i've set my tumblr timer to the highest end of my usage data (2hrs 10 minutes). another mindfulness thing that i like about using the timers is that when i'm switching between apps, my phone tells me how much time left i have (it's currently 1 hour 21 minutes, most of the 49 minutes i've spent writing this lol). i'm just a slut for data so i really like this aspect of the samsung app timer function and it's very useful besides this point.

6. DELETE APPS

okay, i know this seems drastic. but it doesn't NEED to be depending on your habitual problem apps. apps like youtube, instagram, facebook, and tumblr (to a lesser extent ime) (and probably others these are just the ones i have experience with) can pretty easily be transferred to being used exclusively on a web browser. if you use firefox it will even get rid of ads which is very important for overall sanity and for safe web browsing. one of the biggest plusses to moving from an app to a web browser is that it won't automatically play your platform's version of tiktoks. it also makes it more difficult to upload items which is a plus because it will hinder you from doing so and cut back on the loop of expecting validation from recently posted content.

opening instagram without immediately being enthralled by their endless stream of reels has made it SO much easier to control my time on the site. there are tons of plusses to transferring from app browsing to web browsing.

so on the more drastic side, if you are addicted to tiktok you maybe should just delete it. tiktok is intentionally designed so you can't use it in a web browser and can only use it in the app. i will talk more about tiktok and how evil it is later in this post.

7. MOVE DMS TO MESSAGING APPS

if a hesitation to turning off notifactions or deleting apps is from not wanting to miss conversations from online friends, i understand your pain. but, if you are serious about cutting down screen time on apps that are absolutely draining your attention, talk to your friends about switching to a different messaging app. i would suggest signal personally.

your friends may be experiencing similar problems with phone addiction and even if they aren't, if they care about you, they will make this accommodation to help you in this process. i get that this is very scary but i believe in you.

8. USE TIME ON YOUR PHONE FOR OTHER THINGS

depending on your goals for how you spend your time, there are plenty of alternatives to social media / other problem apps you may have. personally i have downloaded a bunch of books on my reading list and will divert attention from dopamine pumping social media to reading. you can find tons of free pdfs of books online and if you are used to reading on your phone, it won't be a difficult transition to read longer form narratives from short text posts.

there are free art apps, language learning apps, self care / journaling apps, meditation apps, etc. that you can use when on your phone. this may seem counterintuitive, getting more apps to battle certain app addictions. but, simply weakening the habit that brings you to the apps that you spend so much time on should help. but watch out for apps that claim they are to teach or better you but have social media built into them / other tricks that keep you glued to your screen. everyone is trying to mine your attention so be wary of all apps and the methods they use to keep you engaged.

9. DON’T BE AFRAID TO PUT YOUR PHONE BACK DOWN AFTER PICKING IT UP

idk if this is a weird one or not but, you know the feeling of going into a room to do something but you forget what so you putter around trying to remember? i feel like going on your phone when you have a phone addiction is often a state of that except the majority of the time you DON’T have a purpose to go on it. so even though it may feel silly, opening your phone only to close it right after is PERFECTLY FINE.

IN CONCLUSION, phone usage is pretty inevitable in this day and age. i've considered getting rid of my phone entirely but, between the expectation to be constantly reachable from employers to QR code menus at restaurants, it just doesn't seem reasonable to get rid of my phone completely. and i will readily admit its convenience and functionality is life changing and wonderful.

however in late stage capitalism, technology doesn't only work for you but it harvests you -- your data, your habits, your time, your attention, your wants, your needs, your thoughts. even leftist spaces with good intentions can trap you (doom scrolling). when i was becoming radicalized during the beginning of the pandemic i spent sooo much time online reading about all these horrible truths of imperialism, colonization, and capitalism, and i felt it was my duty to share these horrors with other people to radicalize them. but it was so unhealthy, especially when shit hit the fan (which it was like constantly doing) because everyone was posting about the horrors and it felt utterly inescapable.

after following some of these steps (which i did in stages over the course of a few years), my relationship with social media has improved greatly and my mental health is actually significantly better. all of this is based on personal experience and observation and this post is specifically for people who want to cut down on phone usage, it's not supposed to be a preachy post that's telling people they spend too much time on their phone.

it's also nowhere near complete. it doesn't tackle addictions to games on phones nor the notorious tiktok. i said i would talk about it later and here it is. i have a chalkboard in my kitchen and all it has written on it is "tiktok is the devil". i have never seen such a commonly used app that has such a degrading effect on all of its users. and it set a precedent to all other social media apps for autoplaying videos that demand user engagement. i was on tiktok for a little less than a year and the way that it would sap anywhere from 20 minutes to over 3 hours of my time when i told myself i'd only watch a few videos was insane. as an aspiring creator i felt that i needed to hop on it to get recognition but now, i don't see it as anything more than a tarpit to trap as many people as possible in its dopamine rich algorithm. but whatever, that's just my little rant. as a social experiment i think it's fascinating lol and i for the creators it's benefited im very happy for them.

anywayy, i hope this helps someone if it gets any attention at all lol. remember no one can make the decision of how you spend your time on or offline but you. not some stranger on the internet, not corporations, no one. you are in control of your time (well besides the whole having to work most of your waking hours to survive but that's what communism is for yayy).

#tumblr #social media #social media addiction #phone addiction #capitalism #dystopia #important #i hope at least one person reads this 😭 #but forreal distancing myself from my phone and being more present in my life has improved it sooo much #cannot emphasize this enough #also phone addiction is not a morally bad thing just like any addiction!!! #the irony of me posting this and then staying on the app waiting to see if it gets engagement #ahhh addiction

[lotus-flowerz]

deadweight

TW!! INSECURITY, FEELINGS OF DEPRESSION AND NOT BEING GOOD ENOUGH, ENDED RELATIONSHIPS (NOT WITH DILUC), SUCIDAL THOUGHTS, GETTING DRUNK

diluc x reader hurt/comfort

F/n- Friend's name

a/n- sorry for the amount of self indulgent fics, i don't feel comfy talking ab it with most of my irls because i dont want to worry them or push them away- im writing this because a (now ex) friend of mine just cut me off to focus more on their partner and because i was more of a deadweight (hence the fic name) than a friend

sorry for the dump ty if you actually read it LMAO

You were walking back towards Mondstat. Another lonely day, doing commissions and helping other people with their problems. All you could even feel nowadays was jealousy and hair-ripping stress.

The sun was setting, the colors of the sky mixing together to form a light purple. It was truly gorgeous. You stood on the bridge to Mondstat looking at the sky with a sullen expression, not like your normally happy one. You found thoughts flitting through your mind- thoughts you weren't supposed to be thinking:

"What color sunset would I make?"

You shook your head to rid yourself of the thought. You had been having these suicidal urges and tendencies for a while- just no one had exactly picked up on them.

You took a deep breath and walked through the gates of the city of freedom. It didn't feel like freedom to you, though. It felt like endless lonesomeness and work.

"Oh, F/n! Hey!" you called. You hadn't seen them in a while since they had started to recover from their own mental illness. You heard that recently they had a new partner!

"Y/n, hey."

"How have you been?" you asked, smiling at them.

"Good. I've been meaning to come talk to you actually- I think it's best if we go our separate ways- you know, you're a bit of a downer sometimes, no offense."

You felt your heart shatter- again, it happened again. A deadweight.

"Right. That's okay, if I'm not needed anymore then by all means, we should go our separate ways." you smiled again, trying to show that there was no harm done.

"Thank you for understanding. You're a good friend, and I'm thankful that you helped me recover."

"Yeah, anytime!"

You both waved and you hurriedly walked towards Angel's Share. You needed a drink. You and your boyfriend, Diluc, had been strained for a bit- only because you were both never home. Both of you were busy, and you weren't really a drinker. You didn't know he was supposed to be bartending tonight.

You took a seat at the bar and ordered a death after noon. One turned into two- and you nursed the second drink for about an hour before finishing it.

You were certainly an unusual patron at the tavern- and seeing you holding a particularly strong drink, sitting in silence and staring at the table was definitely not what Diluc expected to see when he came to help out Charles that night.

You laid your head down on the bar and just held your drink, not wanting to look at or talk to anyone. It was easier to look drunk than to explain why you were there.

But what you didn't expect was that the death after noon took a bit to kick in- you WERE drunk- and you knew you had to get out of that tavern.

Diluc knew you hadn't noticed him. His heart dropped when he had first seen you in the tavern and he was still worried about you as you shoved yourself up from the position you were in and left a tip on your tab. He looked at it out of curiosity and- 3 DEATH AFTER NOONS???

"Charles-"

"Go, you don't have to explain, just go"

"Thank you."

He tore off his apron and threw it behind the bar. He came up behind you and scooped you up bridal style with ease. You made a tiny struggle but he held you tighter.

"It's Diluc. Calm down."

He felt you relax in his arms and he began the trek to the dawn winery.

"Hey Diluc." you slurred out

"Hm?"

"Why do you have me?"

"You're drunk."

"No. Why are you with me?"

"I'm sorry?"

"I weigh you down. Both of us are depressed, but I slow down your recovery. Helping me isn't an easy task and I don't need anyone else leaving because I made them. So if you want to leave just put me down and let me find my own way home. Go live your life without a deadweight pulling you down all the time."

Good god- the alcohol had really loosened your tongue

"Excuse me? Oh Barbatos- darling, I love you. Nothing is going to change that. I love every part of you, mental, physical, personality, you're YOU and I wouldn't change that. You've helped me in my recovery process. You found me at my worst and lifted me up. Why wouldn't I do the same for you? I will never let you go unless it is something that you truly want- and this? This is coming from a different problem. I don't know how long exactly this has been brewing in your pretty little head, but whatever has happened will pass, and whatever will happen, we will be together. I promise."

He kissed your forehead, and looked down at you to admire you. You had wet, tearstained cheeks, your head was leaned against his chest, and you looked as perfect as ever.

"It's okay. I've got you." he whispered.

After arriving at the winery, he cleaned you up and slipped you into your pjs. He put you down in your shared bed. You were only partially awake and aware of what was happening, but you knew you felt something you hadn't felt in a while. A warm fuzzy feeling that welled up from your stomach. You found new tears slipping down your cheeks but you didn't know why.

After telling the maids to prepare a hangover remedy for you to drink in the morning, Diluc joined you in bed. He noticed your starstruck expression and tears, and used his thumb to wipe them away.

"I've got you now. You're alright. Just rest. We can talk about this in the morning, when you're coherent."

He pulled you into him, the smokey scent from his vision mixed with the vanilla shampoo he used filled your senses. His warmth enveloped you, and you felt your eyes begin to close as he combed his fingers through your hair.

"Goodnight, dove. I love you."

#diluc fluff #diluc x reader #diluc #diluc ragnvindr #diluc comfort #diluc x y/n #genshin fluff #genshin x reader #genshin comfort

[goldrushzukka]

10, 17, 21, 29 🤔

hi my love

10. Is there a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

i never ever ever thought aidays would get the attention it did. granted it was originally supposed to be 3 chapters of angst-less romcom hijinks, so of course i didn't expect it to blow up as much as it has bc it also blew up in my own mind to become this huge story. the encouragement when i decided to expand it a bit was amazing, and even better was the theorising and close reading that came when i decided to expand it a Lot. (and this is so cheesy but thank you so much to you specifically michelle for loving aidays enough that i noticed and befriended you bc i would not have finished it without you ily)

17. What’s something you’ve learned about while doing research for a fic?

none of my writing has ever gone into much detail on anything technical so i dont really have a good answer for this except for all the times i learned americans have so many different words for things that really do not need a different word. also some irish-isms are so deeply ingrained in me that it takes saying them out loud in an american accent to hear how wrong it sounds for my narration.

21. Have you ever deleted an entire scene after spending hours laboring over it? If so, why?

29. Share a bit from a fic you’ll never post OR from a scene that was cut from an already posted fic. (If you don’t have either, just share a random fic idea you have that you don’t plan on getting to.)

these two have the same answer so I'll just do them together. in my original draft of aidays11, the scene where sokka goes to get groceries actually had a zukka interaction. i wrote about 1.5k words and then realised i hated all of them and scrapped the scene entirely, and then that supermarket trip became just an excuse to get sokka outside into the rain for the sparks fly/how you get the girl climax moment. i won't post the full scene here bc i truly do actually hate most of it but here's some of it

His shoe squeaks on the linoleum when he stops dead in his tracks.  Zuko, examining the skin of a peach three feet away, looks up at the sound. “Oh,” he says, setting the peach down. Several expressions flash across his face, and Sokka can’t get a read on any of them. “Hey.” The first thing out of Sokka’s mouth, before he can stop it, before he can even think, is, “What are you doing here?” Zuko blinks at him. “Sorry, that was – sorry,” Sokka says. He shouldn’t get any closer, but he does, approaching the fruit stand and cutting the distance between them in half. Like that’ll help him think straight. “This is just – I mean, isn’t there a supermarket closer to your place? This is a little out of your way, isn’t it?” Okay, so there are less rude ways to ask that. Ways that don’t make it sound like Sokka’s being territorial about the fucking produce section. But Sokka doesn’t know how to talk about anything normal right now, especially not with Zuko, because all he can think about is last chances and leaps of faith and his own terrible, terrible wanting.  Is this what it’s going to be like forever? Unable to have a normal interaction without almost spilling every secret he’s ever had, every desire that holds his heart for ransom? Forever crushed under the foot of the elephant in the room? “Azula needs something specific for a recipe she’s working on,” Zuko says. He holds his hands by his sides in a way that Sokka thinks is very intentional. “Our place doesn’t have it. Well, no, it does, but I brought it home and she threatened me with a knife, so I guess our place doesn’t have the right one.” He smiles a little as he says it, and for a second, Sokka forgets about the last chances and the leaps of faith and the terribleness of his wanting. He forgets about Katara and Jet and Suki and the what-does-it-all-mean headache he’s had since waking.  For a second, Sokka is standing in the produce section and the man he loves is smiling at him. Zuko asks, “Do you know where the basil is?”

And Sokka says, “Yeah. Do you need it dried or fresh?” “Fresh, I think.” “Okay. This way.” Sokka leads him to the tiny garden section, right by a big window at the end of the frozen food section. It’s mostly flower bouquets and succulents, but there’s a handful of potted plants under a cheerful sign encouraging customers to start their own herb gardens.  Sokka hands a potted basil plant to Zuko. “There’s a little card in there that tells you how to take care of it.” “Oh, cool,” Zuko says. “Thank you.” “We had one for a little while,” Sokka says, astonished at himself for being able to carry this conversation as far as he has. “We kept it in Suki’s room.” “Your room gets better light, though.” Something awful and bright as a star twists inside Sokka’s chest. “Yeah, but Suki was the one who remembered to water it. And then Momo got at it, and we had to throw away two sets of sheets.” Zuko throws his head back laughing, the same way he did last night and a hundred times before then, and that awful star inside him expands, exploding as he thinks, maybe this is it.  But Zuko says, “Thanks. I’ll see you.” And it isn’t. Sokka lets him go, because what else is there to do? If Zuko wanted to stay, he would. If Zuko wanted to talk about last night, he would. If Zuko wanted to choose him, he would.

#also the scene in aidays11 with suki was supposed to be with aang #it was sokka & aang walking appa in the park and talking through everything that happened the nihht before #& they were going to bump into zuko out for a woman-in-a-movie-facing-a-dilemma run #except first they see him from behind & sokka is like. god. that guys hot. whats wrong w me how can i think abt hot guys at a time like thi #it was supposed to be a silly little comoc relief moment but it felt wrong to do a gag in the middle of all that #so i gave the scene to suki who is naturally mood-lightening #i have some of it written but i never got very far into it bc i decided p quickly to scrap it #haroldtea #asks #my writing

[seasickzig]

Hey, I have a scifi WIP I've been working on for a long time and during a recent (and ongoing) flare of what I'm almost certain at this point is undiagnosed hEDS, I've decided to give my favorite character (he's the tritagonist and already has a whole plot around him) undiagnosed hEDS as well. Any tips for writing it? I'd like it to be subtle enough in the first few books that only other people with EDS would pick up on it qnd have it as a headcanon, and then bam! Actual confirmed diagnosis later on in the series when it's least expected. Do you have any advice for accurately and respectfully writing a character with undiagnosed hEDS? Thank you!!

Hi! Thanks for the question! I want to preface this by saying that my current diagnosis is Hypermobility Syndrome, and I’m waiting to see a geneticist for an EDS diagnosis!

I think the best way to write an undiagnosed character would be to write about how they cope with their symptoms before knowing that what they were experiencing isn’t normal. I knew I was flexible and got uncomfortable easily long before I realized that most people don’t feel discomfort and pain after staying in the same position for more than five minutes! I thought everyone felt similarly to me and just dealt with it a lot better.

Some things I did to cope with my symptoms before realizing they were abnormal were:

1) Ignoring it until I literally couldn’t anymore (leaving me stuck in bed/on the couch for multiple days after)

2) crouching/sitting on the ground anytime I came to a stop

3) Shifting my weight and swinging my legs while standing still

4) leaning on counters, walls, posts, anything that could get weight off my legs

5) taking frequent breaks, especially in the shade. One of my most obvious symptoms prior to diagnosis was heart issues and heat sensitivity!

6) stomach problems, random bad reactions to food that never upset me before, and maybe never will again!

7) Getting extremely fatigued after “simple” tasks like grocery shopping, or even cooking a meal. I need about 10-12 hours of sleep to feel rested.

8) never feeling comfortable! this is my main symptom that I struggle with. I can’t sit, stand, or lay in a position that is comfortable for more than a few minutes. It makes sleeping difficult because I need many pillows to support my body.

Some other things that you could include that I didn’t notice in myself until after doing research are:

1) thin/see through/flexible skin. A lot of people with EDS bruise or get cuts easily because our skin is very fragile!

2) scarring. People with EDS are more likely to form hypertrophic/keloid scars. Thats not always the case, I’m someone who scars very well, but I’m kind of an outlier there!

3) Low reactions to pain medications. Some people with EDS dont get relief from advil/tylenol. And many people with EDS have a high tolerance for local anesthetic! I’m good with general anesthesia, but if I need numbing shots at the dentist, i need more than 4 to feel results.

4) eye issues/migraines. Since connective tissue runs through your whole body, it can also impact how your eyes focus, and your pupils (light sensitivity). Many people with EDS also have Binocular Vision Dysfunction, where our eyes don’t work together to focus on things correctly. That can lead to migraines, car sickness (i get carsick just walking around without glasses), and anxiety around driving (especially at night and on the freeway).

I hope this helps!! Good luck with your book!

#heds #hypermobilty syndrome #hypermobility #hypermobile ehlers danlos #ehlers danlos syndrome #disability

[pinkpicket]

What is blocking your success?

Mfs be ready for typos bc I haven't reviewed this 🤡

Choose an image starting with pile 1 to 6 from left to right.

Pile 1

Wow okay so remember how the society and capitalism constantly screams in our fuvking face telling us the reason why we're not successful? How u don't work hard enough? How u should actually be waking up at 3am to hustle bc that's how billionaires do it? Well that's fucking bullshit so get that shit out of ur mind. U genuinely think bill gates and ms kylie jenner hustled day and night to get $7.25 an hour? No baby they did not. So leave that mindset, it's stupid and it's literally damaging u. My advice would be to actually relax and spoil urself instead of shitting on urself for needing 9 hours of sleep. Baby i will be honest with u, as long as u treat urself harshly the universe will treat u the same. So give urself some love and relax, u deserve it.

Pile 2

Ya u need to stop thinking about relationships and dating and actually start planning and shit bc guess what? Shit needs planning it dont just happen out of thin air. So sit ur ass down and write down a plan and change the plan 74747 if that's what it takes for it to work out.

Pile 3

Communication. Baby u really lack the ability to properly communicate and persuade others. Trust me i get where u r coming from, people are fucking annoying but in this society we have to basically learn to stfu at times and not be honest bc truly that's what everyone does. So keep ur thoughts to urself and form relationships on a superficial level ( be detached ) just so u can progress in ur life and career. Remember people's ego are fragile so dont fuvk up ur life with being unnecessarily harsh and honest with ur words, be diplomatic and suger coat that shit till it turns so sweet they get hooked.

Pile 4

Whatever direction ur heading toward rn holds no success. So u wanna be the hermit and find urself? That's great but in this fucked up capitalistic society that wont bring u success. I genuinely hate to say this but spirituality is not possible with success ( materially and career wise at least) for you ( this is just for u bc others actually require to be spiritual to be successful). Also it's time for u associate and talk to people more, being an introvert is a big disadvantage for you, so go out, make friends and soon u will find success. Group work will bring you success.

Pile 5

Enough of planning, it's time to work. Dont just sit around and expect great shit to happen only bc u manifested it ( remember saturn rules everything material in this world, so if u want a successful career with good money, u gotta go by saturn's rules which are being disciplined and hard work) dont relay on shit that people from tiktok snd tumblr tell u to do "all u have to do is manifest by this technique" and not do shit?? Baby that's not how real life works. U work and u get what u deserve ( at least for u this is like this, hell manifestation might work for others but for u i see this as a different case)

Pile 6

Baby ur tired and i know, i truly see u worked hard and nothing happened. It's like all that hard work was wasted but relax now bc something big is coming. Baby u r getting what u deserve, idk when but it will come. Honestly im genuinely soo happy bc u truly deserve this. So what's blocking ur success? Nothing. Whatever it is, it will come at the right time.

Okay bye uglies. Hope u liked this NOW FOLLOW ME BC IM LITERALLY SO HELPFUL AND PRETTY 🥰💕

#free tarot #pac reading #tarot reading #free card reading #pick a card reading #pick a picture #pick a card #tarotonline #free tarot readings #tarot #tarot of the day #pick a pile