#with: orion | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fleetsummers · 4 months

Text

with @orioncarnell | working out the definition of 'daddy issues' and how that applies

Orion: Thank you for offering to come along. -Orion says, casting a sideways glance at Fleet as they make their way down the road- I know you normally do not go out. But I believe you are the most knowledgeable about whether we have any use for the olive plantation.

fleet summers: -practically skipping along next to orion, looking around at everything like it's brand-new- I'll be honest, I never thought olives would even grow in someplace like West Virginia! Bea says it's totally a thing, though. Not that I doubted you, Orion, it's just she's local.

Orion: I understand. -Orion nods- She knows more about the area. It makes sense to listen to her. I should ask her more about the area. -his gaze is slightly curious- Where are you from?

fleet summers: The west coast! And on top of that... -puts his hand next to his mouth, in a loud whisper- I'm Canadian. Where are you from, Orion? I can't place any sort of accent with you.

Orion: Canadian? -Orion blinks confusedly at Fleet's whisper; he knows at least that Canada is situated north of the U.S., he has little frame of reference outside of that- I see. Wasn't it very cold there? In Canada? I'm from Kansas. -he thinks for a moment- It was cold there, too. In the winter.

fleet summers: -regards orion for a while, trying to figure him out in turn- It wasn't too very cold, not where I lived. On the water, near the mountains. The most beautiful place. I miss it. Do you miss Kansas? Where you lived in Kansas? With Uncle Henry and Aunt Em?

Orion: It does sound nice. I have seen some pictures of Canada. -he regards Fleet curiously- Did you live near a lake? Or the sea? -he tilts his head, slightly confused at Fleet's reference- No I didn't. Is that a reference?

fleet summers: I lived near the sea! The Pacific Ocean, to be exact. -fleet laughs merrily when orion asks about the reference, dropping immediately into the skipping pattern from the movie- It is a reference, if you follow the yellow brick road! -he sings the song for a bit, before circling back to orion- Don't tell me you've never seen the Wizard of Oz. I have to make you watch it. I think you'd like it very much, Orion from Kansas.

Orion: -he watches, even more confused as Fleet breaks into song suddenly- I haven't. I have never watched a movie. If you want to show me, I will watch it.I assume it is about Kansas? -he considers Fleet for a moment- You are very good at singing. You seem to enjoy it.

fleet summers: You've never watched - ohmigod. Orion!! -he stops, standing in front of orion and popping his fists gently against the taller man's chest for emphasis- We'll watch it the minute we get back to town. Or after we clean up when we get back to town. You need to be comfortable for a movie. And yes, it's about Kansas! It's about a girl named Dorothy who's stuck on her family's farm - anyway. I won't give it away. -resumes walking, putting his hands below his chin and fluttering his eyelashes at the compliment- I love it. Singing is one of the best forms of therapy there is. Do you sing? You have such a nice throaty thrummy voice.

Orion: -he seems caught just a bit off guard by Fleet's sudden outburst- I see. I did not know that. I would like to see the movie, then. -the description makes him hitch for just a moment, but he moves on quickly- Thank you. You seem to know a lot about singing. I did not know singing could be therapy. I used to sing, back when I was working on the farm. -he seems lost in thought for a moment- You should not sing out here. Walkers might be attracted to the noise. Even if it sounds very pleasant.

fleet summers: Oh! Oh. -is a little chastised, falling into more sedate step next to orion, though he has to hustle to keep up- You're right, of course. I'm sorry. Does it get very much more dangerous when you take people like me out with you? Who don't know all the survival skills?

Orion: -he notices and slows his step a little- Sometimes. -he answers truthfully- But not now. You were just too loud. That happens. -he casts a considering glance at Fleet- Was getting to Redwood hard for you?

fleet summers: Ohh-hh-hhh ... it was all right. My cousin brought me, but he didn't stay. I was very lucky, for the most part, that I was visiting family who lived nearby. I don't suppose I'll ever know what happened to all my other family and friends. -sighs, tugging at his clothes to self-soothe-

Orion: I see. That must be hard. -he stays quiet for a moment after- Do you miss your cousin? And your family?

fleet summers: I miss them but I made a decision, when this all started to get really bad, that I'd live every moment I had with them and then try to move on when they were gone. Because everyone was going, sooner or later. -moves a little closer to orion, subconsciously- I guess we all came up with these little personal ways of coping, huh? How about you? How do you cope with missing the people you lost? Or the way of life you lost, too. Your home in Kansas under the rainbow.

Orion: That is an interesting way of thinking. -he seems to ruminate on Fleet's words- Did you move on, then? -the question surprises him in a sense that he needs a moment to answer; he notices Fleet shifting closer, but he stays on his path, not moving away- I'm not sure. I don't miss Kansas. I don't really think about the people I lost. I usually work so there is not much time. I sometimes talk about them with Isaac. He helps me a lot. Do you have a person that helps you?

fleet summers: I did move on. I'm very good at doing whatever I set my mind to. Some people think it makes me seem a little cold, but...I dunno. I see it as self-regulation. I don't like being sad in front of other people. -since orion doesn't move away, fleet tucks himself against the tall man's side as they walk- Do you not think about them because you work so much, or do you work so much so you don't have to think about them? -cranes his neck to look up at orion- I don't have anyone like that. I don't think I need anyone just yet. Maybe after a while.

Orion: I don't believe that is cold. You don't have to feel a certain way. If it helps you, there is no reason why you shouldn't. -he finds himself uncomfortable with the contact, but not enough to pull away; he assumes it helps Fleet stay calm so he stays; even as the question makes his brows furrow; he stays quiet, considering whether he should answer- I am not sure. Both, maybe. -he turns his head to meet Fleet's gaze- There are many kind people. If you need anyone, I am sure you will find them.

fleet summers: -contemplates this for a moment- All right, then. I'll feel or not feel however I want. Is that how it works for you too? -fleet has perhaps an inkling that orion doesn't like such close physical contact, but he doesn't move away- You've found kind people here, is what I'm gathering. For when the work isn't enough to keep your mind occupied.

Orion: -he gives a nod of acknowledgement- I am not sure that I am able to control it as easily. But what others believe should not matter to how you feel. You feel for a reason, but it just matters what you take away from that. -he repeats a saying- Yes, that us true.. Isaac. Do you know him?

fleet summers: I do know Isaac, yes. Or I know his work. -a little icily- He stabbed my father through the face and then bit a chunk out of his scalp. Misplaced vengeance?

Orion: I see. -he regards Fleet carefully, as if searching for something- He has reasons for the things he does. I am not sure why he attacked your father. -he considers for a moment- He sometimes does things that he regrets, or that do not make much sense to anyone but him.

fleet summers: -frowns, but his desire for teasing out threads of stories outweighs his sense of moral outrage- Do you make excuses for him, after he does? Do you feel like you should go around and apologize to people, or try to explain what he might have been thinking?

Orion: -he looks puzzled for a moment- No. There is no reason. Isaac is responsible for what he does. Do you do that for your father?

fleet summers: Oh! -stops short, taken aback by the question- Oh, wow. For some reason I didn't ... see that coming. -shakes his head, then starts walking again, this time not as close to Orion- I think maybe? A little. I don't make apologies to people for him, I don't think he'd care for that, but I try to figure out why he does what he does. Fortunately he hasn't done anything as bad in Redwood as he has in the past.

Orion: -he looks slightly puzzled at Fleet's surprise but doesn't question them- I see. Do you not know your father well? -he seems to carefully consider Fleet- What has he done in the past?

fleet summers: -gives a bubbly laugh- I don't know my father at all. He left my mother and I when I was a baby. This is the first time I'm meeting him and it's a lot. To navigate. But I want to give it a proper shot. -scuffs his shoe against the ground for a moment- He did some terrible things to women when he was a prison guard.

Orion: You are happy that he is here, then. Is your mother here, too? -growing up with his parents always there, Orion finds it hard to imagine a life without them, and meeting them down the line; Fleet's next sentence makes him tilt his head- What did he do?

fleet summers: No, my mom died. Before I got here. We were visiting relatives in this area when everything went bad, and most of them are dead, I'm pretty sure. -Fleet doesn't answer Orion right away, instead ranging to the side, then back, then around him before ending up next to him again- He traded for sex with them. But I mean - he was a guard, he held all the power in that situation, so how much of an actual trade is it?

Orion: You must miss her. Or have you moved on? -Orion watches Fleet carefully as he paces; the revelation makes him pause for a moment, though he keeps up his step; working out on how to handle this new information- Did your father force them?

fleet summers: -stopping to glare up at Orion, hissing- I don't know! I don't know what exactly he did, I didn't ask, it was one of the first conversations I had with him, why would I ask? -realizes he's breathing fast, up on his toes to confront Orion, and visibly brings himself back down, running his fingers through his hair- I miss Mommy but I knew she would die. I knew everyone would die. So that's why I made that decision to move on. I've moved on. Now I have Daddy.

Orion: -he seems surprised by the outburst- I am sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. -he says carefully- It is an important thing to know, isn't it? For you? -he seem entirely calm as Fleet seems to relax back; remembering how Fleet had come up to him and pressed close to him in, what Orion assumed, to be an effort to comfort himself, he reaches out and presses his palm on the other man's shoulder; after a pause, he asks- Do you love him?

fleet summers: Ohh-hh-hhh, no, don't apologize - it's a weird subject is all? I don't know how to really digest it. -he notes the care with which Orion frames and poses his next question, touched- It's very kind of you to still want to talk about this with me after I snapped at you. Thank you for that. -leans gratefully into Orion's big hand- I do love him. I didn't expect that, I had no real feelings about him this whole time, my whole life, but now that I've met him and he isn't even really sorry he ran out on us and he's capable of such terrible things. I still love him and I want him to love me. What does that say?

Orion: -he listens, something stirring inside of him with Fleet's words; making him quiet down in a different way than before, more turned inwards, before he speaks up again- He is your family. And loving them is normal, even if they do bad things. -he lifts his hand off of Fleet's shoulder- Do you believe he might hurt you?

fleet summers: I don't think he would hurt me. I think he only ... -winces, but then carries on doggedly- I think he only hurts and intimidates women, that's what gets him off. God, it sounds even worse out loud, doesn't it? Why would I love somebody like that? Is it because I feel like I'm safe, but I don't care about anyone else? I warned Mayra about him and maybe that's a betrayal of my dad but I just ... felt like I should.

Orion: I see. -he carefully considers; should he talk to Isaac about this?- I believe it is good that you warned her. I don't think you are betraying your father. This is not an easy situation for you, is it?

fleet summers: No. It's very hard to figure out. He told me for a reason, right? And people change, all the time. I don't want him to be expelled from town. That's what I'm worried about. But if people like Isaac get to stay, so should my dad.

Orion: -something inside Orion shifts at the comparison- Isaac is not an active danger. He would not force himself on someone. -his voice is sharp, his gaze more intense, but after a moment he shifts back- I... I'm sorry. I did not mean to snap at you.

fleet summers: It's okay. -he looks at Orion a touch differently, absorbing this new information- He means a lot to you. It's not easy to hear other people tear down the people you love. Is ... is he like a father figure to you? Like my dad is to me? -tips his head, rolling his eyes and twirling his fingers at his own statement- He's my real dad but, y'know. I don't know him so basically it's a father figure kind of situation.

Orion: -he still seems just a bit tense as he considers Fleet 's question- ...In certain ways, he is. But he is a lot of things to me. -he pauses, as if he needed a pause to figure out how to put things into words- I feel safe with him. Do you feel safe with your father?

fleet summers: -that stops Fleet in his tracks, and he scowls, mouth going hard as he turns forward to keep walking- No. I don't suppose I do. Not all the way.

Orion: -he looks at Fleet, taking in the change before he follows- Is that okay for you?

fleet summers: It's confusing. It's not that I feel he might hurt me, not really. I'm not a woman, after all. -he bites his lip, not quite able to parse through all that-

Orion: -he looks at Fleet quietly, carefully; after a few moments, he asks- Do you want him to hurt you?

fleet summers: Maybe just a little. That's messed up, right? -glares at Orion, although again, it's not really about Orion- I wanna be the most important thing in town to him, is what I mean. He's just ... I don't know. His whole life seems like it's been about violence so maybe ... I don't know. Ugh.

Orion: -there's something in his gaze, an ever so slight, partial recognition- You want his life to be about you. -he is careful as he speaks- Do you want him to be violent with you, so he won't be violent with anybody else?

fleet summers: I don't know if I'd go that far. I don't like getting beaten up, if that's what you're asking. -frets at his bottom lip for a while- I learned kickboxing because I don't like getting beat up. Where I lived was pretty good in terms of being safe if you were queer, but it wasn't all the way safe. Especially when people think you're white but you're not. -sighs, shaking his head in a visual cue that he's shaking those thoughts aside- But yes to the first part. I want to be uppermost in his thoughts, all the time. Daddy issues, y'know.

Orion: I see. Did people hurt you for that before? Being queer and not white? -Orion responds after listening to Fleet; there were a few things that puzzled him- I am not sure what 'daddy issues' are.

fleet summers: -tiptoes closer to Orion, reaching out to slip his hand into the other man's; pausing for a moment in shock at how huge Orion's hands really are before he gathers himself to talk- They did. Only one time, but it was bad enough that I promised myself it would never happen again. -makes a fussy, birdlike sound- Daddy issues is when you had an unusual or absent relationship with your father, so it comes out in other ways. Sometimes you date older men - I did that - and sometimes you get obsessive about certain dynamics. Trying to be the most important thing in your father or father figure's life. Wanting all his attention, no matter what form it comes in.

Orion: -he is a bit more used to Fleet's need for physical contact so he let's Fleet take his hand- You did not deserve that. -he tilts his head, taking in what Fleet has said- I see. Is that why you wish to date your father? -he pauses for a moment- Are daddy issues a bad thing?

fleet summers: -cranes his head back to look at Orion at that statement, trying to figure out if Orion means it as a dig, or shade, or what - finally deciding that he means it metaphorically given what they're talking about- Yes. Dating guys who're like Daddy, or at least the same age as him, is like filling a hole in my life. I don't think having daddy issues is necessarily bad, it's like anything else -- it depends on what you do about them. I'm not doing anything that'll harm me, so it's neutral, at worse. -skips deftly over a hole in the ground- How about you, Orion? Do you have daddy issues?

Orion: I see. That is good, I suppose. -he regards Fleet carefully and intently, clearly rolling over what the other man has said; even more so at the question- I'm not sure. -this feels like unusual territory; so he is careful, measured as he speaks- I do not want to 'date' anybody. I enjoy being with Isaac, but I would want to be with him if he was younger, too. -he quiets down for a moment- I do like it when he pays attention to me. He does that a lot. But I don't mind not being the most important person to him. I don't believe he has one person that is the most important. I like that... He guides me. And teaches me. And he takes care of me. -his forehead creases- He fills me out. Does that... Make sense?

#with: orion #c: orio001 #I DIDN'T REALIZE I SPACED ON THIS URGH #but might as well post it since cole is now deceased #so the conversation's firmly in the past

0 notes

isaacapatow · 3 months

Text

. . with @nickitxrres & @orioncarnell | the raiders : a routine jaunt once ike starts doing scavenging jobs goes awry; the raiders have a come to jesus about the aftermath of ike's head injury and how it was incurred

"I guess the big question," Ike said as they walked along the cracked-up road, "is what the hell we're gonna do when we finally do run out of caffeine sources. Make a big trip down to Atlanta to the Coca-Cola headquarters? Hope they've got..." He trailed off, attention caught by a slow susurrus of movement behind a stack of broken roadwork barriers on the side of the road. "Y'know, I'm not even sure how they caffeinate drinks. Orion, have you ever had a Coke?"

Ike paused for a moment to stick out his leg, tapping the inside of his boot sole with his bat. It was an old habit but one he hadn't done in a while -- things had gotten so serious in the past few months that he hadn't much felt in the mood for a cocky little signature move. But he did it now, right before he lope-hopped to the edge of those barriers and swung his bat with a two-handed flourish, clear taking off the juicily rotted head of the lone groaner who'd dragged its disintegrating self out. Ike gave a whoop, sticking his arms up in the air and then turning back to the other two with a grin. "Even better than the real thing! God DAMN!"

He hadn't felt good about going back out on the job, but he had to admit that having Nicki and Orion with him -- that compensated for a lot of the rot in his own brain, the hitch and the pause, the crumbly edges. He felt okay. He felt strong. Optimistic, even, as he smiled at his two beloved raiders. Faces that Ike felt he could look at forever and on into the afterlife and be completely happy. "It's in a converted garage," Ike said. "This coffee roasting place. I guess I can't ride 'em for being hipsters, since their little boutique operation being invite-only is the whole reason no other humps have found and plundered it yet. Can you imagine how the town's gonna go apeshit when we come back with real honest-to-god coffee?"

Nicki laughed to herself as she trailed behind Ike down the road. It felt good to be out on a raid again. Maybe she should have taken the extra week and checked with Val but she was itching for a proper raid. Plus, she was with Ike and Orion, things couldn't go too bad, right? There was three of them and if shit did hit the fan, they could handle it. There was no doubt about that, especially as she watched the old Ike and his signature move before taking the head clean off a walker.

Ike's joy brought a smile to her face and she applauded him. "Very nicely done, Papi." Her hands dropped to adjust the sling of her bag on her shoulders. She was glad to see him out again. Fighting and enjoying himself. Being stuck in the town had done a number on him as much as it had her and she was starting to get a little worried about him. It was like a dark cloud overhead but now with him smiling and jammering on, everything seemed brighter.

"Wait, they converted an old garage to make coffee? What a waste of good space." But at least the place had coffee. In theory. "I still think we should make a greenhouse or something to grow coffee beans. There's bound to be some way to grow them, right? But I think with this score the town should throw us a fucking parade."

"I haven't had a coke. That is a drink, right? I have seen some of the cans lying around or in stores." In contrast to their open, unbridled joy Orion was much more calm as he regarded his surroundings. Of course, he was glad Isaac and Nicki had been appearantly cleared again and were ready to go out. Between him and Ares the workload had been stretched. Of course, they did their duty and picked up the extra burden without complaining, but there was simply only so much two people could do.

Despite that, Orion couldn't quite shake that sense of worry gnawing at him. He knew Isaac was usually responsible enough to not go out when he hadn't been cleared, but his injury had affected him more than most realized. It was good to see him back to his old habits, but there was still the sense that something with the other man had become brittle. And he knew well enough that Nicki would go out without even being cleared. But everything seemed to at least be alright, so Orion just reminded himself to stay vigilant.

"I believe somebody mentioned building a greenhouse. But there are more useful and viable crops than coffee. At least for now. If we find enough coffee, we won't need to grow them for now." He was already making his way off in the direction they had discussed, casting a glance back at both Isaac and Nicki. "Let's keep going. It should be close by, right? It's best if we can return quickly."

"It is a drink, it's the very best drink, and the next time I find a Coke you're the one getting it." Ike pointed finger guns at Orion -- pew pew -- but nodded and picked up their stride again when the younger raider prompted them to keep moving. He could tell Orion was being watchful; he normally was, but this time he was taking both Ike and Nicki into consideration. Ike wasn't quite sure if he found this darling or annoying, so he just let it lie. "It's just a long block or two this way."

It was a sort of isolated industrial area, without a major road, so when they found the block with the warehouses and garages it was somewhat overgrown. "Right this way," Ike said, with a flourish of his arm. There weren't any groaners around, he knew that much; nothing there for them to be interested in. And no living people would find this place of much worth as either a stop or a stay.

So maybe that was why Ike was thinking of other things, scattershot and distracted, as they went past a wall with arcing, abstract spray paint symbols on it. The same sorts of motifs, the same kind of spray paint, as he and Orion had seen in that mall parking lot, that he and Nicki had seen in the Home Depot. He didn't notice the slight whiff of toluene that meant it was relatively fresh. He just kept moving.

"I think he needs more than a Coke, Papi. And Coke isn't even the best drink. Not unless you're adding rum to it. No, best drink is still coquito and I swear the day I find all of those ingredients, this town is getting a whole batch of it and we're celebrating." Of course, best drink was debatable, depending on who you asked but Nicki would always argue for some coquito, especially since winter was around the corner and so were the holidays. "Yo quiero coquito..."

Orion's urging picked up her pace just a bit and she made sure to keep up with the long legs of the two giants she was with. She was fast when she needed to be so she wasn't worried about falling behind. Plus, she knew they would never do that to her. At least, no on purpose. Maybe accidentally or to mess with her....

She was just falling into step with Ike when she caught a whiff of fresh paint that made her noise twitch. "Ay dios what is that smell?" She looked up to find the source and her brow furrowed a bit as she saw the weird painted symbols on the wall. "Uh.....boys.....does this look like fresh paint to you?"

Nicki's banging on about coquito was another Nicki-thing, always poo-pooing what was available and talking about some bigger, wilder thing to shoot for. Ike shook his head with a smile, not wanting to dampen her enthusiasm. You had to let her run wild and sniff everything she could sniff, sometimes, or she'd gnaw her own leg off just to get out her frenzies. Besides, it was sweet, and nostalgic; he could taste the coquito they used to have at the furniture place he'd worked at, the coconut luxuriousness of it.

When she slowed down to mention fresh paint, though, Ike was already looking ahead. "Fresh paint, no big deal," he said, not stopping. "C'mon. We got better things to be concerned with."

Nicki was studying the paint. Something was bugging her about it but she couldn't quite figure out what. Maybe it was just the fact that it was fresh paint which meant someone could have been nearby, but then again there was three of them and the three of them were deadly by themselves. All three of them? Not a person or a group said a chance. Still, though, something wasn't right but if Ike wasn't bothered by it then she wouldn't dwell on it. She wafted the air in front of her face to spell the smell of the paint and simply not it so she could focus on following the two men to the old renovated garage.

"Thank you. I would like to try it, then." Orion responded to Isaac's offer, though his mind quickly turned back onto the mission at hand. It had gotten easier, relaxing and talking to Isaac, and Nicki, while on the job. But with a sense of slight unease settling over him, sticking inside his ribcage, he didn't want to lose focus. Old training kicking in easily. Even though he listened to Nicki talking about something called coquito, and instead looked ahead.

He only noticed the fresh paint when Nicki pointed it out. Just like her, he stopped for a moment, eyes trailing over the bright markings. Paint markings were not too uncommon - Orion had seen them, people marking up property, but something about them once more pulled at something inside his head. Way back when, he'd been taught to always listen to his gut. If something felt off, it was likely off. And now, Orion sensed that something was not quite right. That he was missing something. Still - not enough reason to suggest heading back. Isaac seemed unbothered. After a short moment of contemplation, the raider turned away. Isaac knew what he was doing. He had been head raider for long enough.

"Isaac is right. We should keep going." Orion added, though Nicki already seemed to shake off her own confusion and follow them down the road. It wasn't long before the garage appeared. At least, Orion assumed it was the garage they were looking for. Small, easily overlooked, if it hadn't been for a coffee cup, painted on the door in sun-bleached colors. "There should be a back entrance. Otherwise we will have to figure out a way to open the garage door." Which wasn't ideal. They were heavy. "Should we split up?"

"We should split up," Ike agreed easily. "Round back sounds most likely, I'll take there. Nicki, you check that place for a way through--" he pointed at the small warehouse on one side of the coffee garage, stocked with what seemed to be Korean beauty products from the faded posters in the one window, "--and Orion, you take the other one." A place that had equipment for people who gave massages, on the garage's other side. They'd both take a cursory look through, Ike was sure. He was still the best when it came to seeing the long-range possible potential of anything they came across, but these two were gradually starting to learn the ropes on that. Orion slightly better because of his fucked-up prepper parents who scavenged and repurposed as a way of life, but when Nicki wasn't preoccupied with finding biters to kill, she was beginning to take more notice of unusual items to include in their hauls.

God, they were both so good at this. Ike could hardly even decide which one of them be was more proud of.

They all knew the whistle that the raiders used to alert each other of danger or call for help, so Ike didn't bother telling them anything else before he set into a long-legged lope around the side of the building. The massage equipment place was on the end, so he had to lap that first and then go past it at the back. Which was a little more jumbled than the front; clearly in the last days of this industrial park's function, people had dumped stuff back here, abandoned their cars, overflowed the dumpsters. Ike had seen this in scores of places.

He approached the backdoor cautiously, bat at the ready, past a dumpster that had a high, dusty rotten smell that caught in his sinuses. "Fuck," Ike muttered, crinkling his nose and then pressing his gloved thumb against his upper lip. He didn't want to sneeze. It always gave him a rip roaring headache these days, like he'd torn his wound open on the inside, right against his skull. Fortunately, that seemed to do the trick; he got up to the back door, inspected it for possible tripwires or triggers, found it lacking them. He'd jimmy it open and then--

The dusty smell got up in his nose again and Ike sneezed, hard. Pain shot through his skull and he slapped his hand against the door, and then he felt his head ... expand? Lift into the air? No his -- his whole fucking body was lifted in the air and Ike shouted in startled alarm, hands and the toes of his boots getting tangled in the webbing of a net that had scooped him up wholesale. He'd missed it, buried under the debris, like he'd missed that fresh spray paint smell. He could see it, though, from this vantage point caught uncomfortably tight against the building over the backdoor: those same arcing abstract marks, painted onto the lid of the dumpster.

A teenage girl sauntered below the net, looking up at him. Familiar-looking, and it took Ike a minute to realize she was the teenager from the Home Depot he and Nicki had raided, the one who'd trapped Nicki and then gotten away. "Oh, fucking hell," he groaned, "You're a damn--"

"Watch it, Ike," the girl said. "You might not want to piss off the girl whose whole group you slaughtered. She might decide to kill you much more slowly." She smiled, her pointed-filed teeth gleaming.

Honestly, Nicki didn't like the idea of splitting up. At all. The last time she had split up was with Ares and the wound, while mostly healed, still fucking hurt. She didn't like it at all but Ike was the one in charge. If he was making the call, who was she to doubt it? She didn't know why but this just felt like a bad idea and she cast a glance over to Orion to see if he was sensing it as well or if it was just her. Nicki wanted to vocalize her concerns but Ike had to know what he was doing. "Just be careful, okay?" she said before darting off to the small warehouse.

The door didn't take much to jimmy open and even with the squeak of the hinges, Nicki was able to slip through without too much noise. But what she saw wasn't exactly all that reassuring. There were bedrolls - multiple bedrolls. Someone was camping out here. A few look like they had been slept in recently, which meant whoever was staying there was probably nearby. Shit. She pulled out her machete and gave it a twirl as she cautiously walked through the warehouse towards the entrance to the garage. There was an entrance and it looked somewhat propped open. But that wasn't what caught her eye.

It was a piece of paper stuck to the wall with a knife and two names etched on it - NICKI, IKE. Well that wasn't good. Who the fuck....?

There was a sound of something being propelled up and Ike's voice crying out in surprise. Any caution was gone and Nicki ran towards the sound. She rounded the corner and came skidding to a halt behind some cabinets when she saw what the commotion was - Ike, suspended in a net with a teenage girl under him. Not just any teenage girl - the same one from the Home Depot. Doubt shit. She thinks for a moment and blows the high pitched whistle so Orion can hear. Of course, the teenager hears her as well and turns her head to see Nicki. "Come on, chica, you and I have a score to settle." Nicki wasn't about to let her get away a second time so she took her stance and waved at the girl to come at her.

The girl growled a little through her sharpened teeth and ran at Nicki and when she did, Nicki turned and ran away from Ike. Orion could get him down while Nicki took care of this. She could fend of a teenager, after all.

Orion accepted the order to split up. They were all capable fighters in their own regard and, if danger arose, they could call on each other. With the same practical precision, Orion started following his route of the building. His eyes searching his surroundings, ears open for any unusual sound or signal coming from his fellow raiders. The door to what appeared to be a massage equipment store, opened on the first try. Dust billowed up, and shining his flashlight into the dark interior, Orion could see a few rats turning their head his way before scurrying off into the shadows.

Orion didn't mind the dark so he stepped in without much hesitation, only giving a careful glance to make sure that nothing and nobody was hiding. It seemed that not really anybody had visited this place since the beginning of the apocalypse, A layer of dust seemed to coat everything, only a few products seemed to be thrown around. Which was why the footprints caught his eye. Fresh. Too fresh, like somebody had been here not too long ago.

The sharp whistle caught his attention.instantaneously. Raider instincts working, Orion remained calm, trailing back to the entrance. Focused on his surroundings, intent on catching any potential threat, the raider made his way towards the sound quickly but carefully. Rounding the corner, she could see Nicki running and what looked to be a teenage girl chasing after her with surprising speed. And Isaac - hung up by his foot. Trapped.

Orion didn't waste any time - casting a quick glance around to make sure that there were no threats he made his way over to Ike. "Are you hurt? Can you walk?" Orion asked, slipping the knife out of his belt and began working on the rope. It was a quick affair, the more tough part of it being catching Ike as the rope snapped so the raider's body didn't slam into the ground. He did manage, and soon enough Ike was down and on the ground, helped back up by Orion. The younger man gave Ike a quick once-over. "Let's go. We'll have to check up on Nicki and retreat."

The coffee would have to wait for now. They needed to retreat and recuperate to figure out their next steps. It was then that Orion noticed movement. Small figured snaking out from around the corner. Teenagers. Five, all armed. All hostile looking. The teeth. Filed down into pointy ends that gleamed in the sun. Orion didn't say anything. He gave Ike one quick, signaling glance before he grabbed the other man by his jacket and started running.

Anger at himself and frustration and embarrassment at the whole situation were snapping inside Ike's chest even as he felt the relief of Orion appearing, assessing the situation swiftly like any of his raiders would do. "Just my fuckin' pride on the line," Ike answered sourly. "I can walk once you get me down. The problem is me needing getting-down in the first fuckin' place."

But at least it was just Orion, who wasn't reading him the riot act for getting himself caught or for missing any of the (now glaringly obvious) signs that the Sunface kids had set up shop here, were using it as some kind of base, or at least somewhere they could booby-trap for unsuspecting people they considered enemies. "She remembered me from the Home Depot run," Ike said, once Orion got him down and he tested out his ankle, finding it usable. Thank god. "She called me by name. This is getting concerning."

He didn't argue with Orion's quick decision on what their next move should be, especially when those other Sunface teenagers showed up. Sharp teeth and weapons, all glaring with the same hatred and intensity as the original girl. "Yeah," Ike said, hopping backwards a few staggered steps before Orion manhandled him into pace. Ike didn't ask questions. Orion was moving with a sureness and determination that telegraphed that he knew exactly which direction Nicki had gone in, so all Ike did was give their signal whistle, hoping that Nicki would hear it and would forget evening the score with the Sunface girl. They weren't ready for this. Ike knew he was healed up enough, that there was no danger of his head wound breaking open, but still -- as they ran, he could swear he started to smell that distinct oily stench of scorched flesh and hair, cooked blood as Renee had cauterized his scalp shut.

"Nicki! Oh, Nicki! I'm coming to get you, Nicki!" Nicki could hear the teenage girl singing her little song as she chased after her and honestly, it was disquieting. But Nicki didn't let it bother her too much. All she needed to do was get her far enough away so that Orion could get Ike down and they could regroup and figure out their plan of attack. Things obviously were much more precarious now with the Sunfaced Wannabe teenager hanging around and knowing Ike and her. After all, they had left quite a bloodbath back at the Home Depot and as much as Nicki wanted to stop running, turn and fight the little bitch, she had made a promise to Ares to avoid getting hurt. If Nicki was fully healed she'd think it would be no problem but she was just getting back out and she didn't want to take any unnecessary chances.

Nicki led the girl into the side building that Nicki had come in. Sure, the girl probably knew the layout better than her but Nicki had a few tricks up her own sleeves. The girl liked traps so why not put her in one of her own? When Nicki ran through the door quickly hid behind some of the old shelves. The girl came in and when she didn't spot Nicki right away her paced slow. "Nicki....come out to playyyyy.....we've been looking forward to seeing you and Ike again." Nicki kept her breath even as she watched the girl walk further and further in. When it was clear Nicki sprung out and ran back into the coffee house. She closed the door behind her and shoved a bookcase in front of the door to block the entrance.

There was a victorious, smug grin on her face as she heard the door rattle and the girl growl in frustration. "Yeah, that's right. HOW DOES IT FEEL?" Her victory was short lived as she heard the whistle and she turned her head to look in the direction. Crap, why were they whistling her? Her machete was out of it's sheath and she ran in the direction, almost plowing directly into Orion and Ike. "What....." but she stopped as she saw the five teens chasing after them. God damn, this just got a whole lot worse. And she had just blocked one of the entrances. "This way is no good. Out the back," she said, nodding towards the back of the garage. So she grabbed Ike with her free hand to turn them in the direction. He knew where that entrance was - her and Orion could watch his six.

By the time they reached Nicki -- bringing a lurch of relief to his chest -- Ike felt almost entirely turned-around. All he could focus on was the phantom smell and pain of his head wound, a weird throb that didn't hurt enough to incapacitate him but sure as fuck was doing a lot to disorient him. And actively on the run from a bunch of murderous fang-faced teenagers was not the time for him to be able to take a breath and focus and work through it.

So he didn't protest when Nicki gave him a shove towards whatever exit she'd clocked, simply run-hopping towards it as his net-hung ankle got the feeling back into it properly. They'd be right behind him. Of that, Ike had no doubt.

Nicki was literally right behind Ike, urging him towards the back entrance while she watched as the five teenagers were running full speed towards them. Ike seemed to be hobbling - they needed to move faster or they were gonna be overrun. Oh, Ike was not gonna be happy with her....

She gave him a shove before turning and pulling out her crowbar. It would be less lethal than the machete and all she needed was to buy them time. "Orion, get him out of here," she yelled at him as she gave her crowbar a couple twirls and stood her ground. "I'll be right behind you, just go!"

The five teenagers came to a halt and she restributed her weight while she gave them a snarl. "You want them? You'll have to go through me." She was pretty sure she could hold her own until they were outside. All she would have to do was wait for the whistle and she could run to them. No harm, no foul.

= = =

It had been a fairly quiet, grim hike back to town, but at least Ike felt that his ankle had sorted itself out on the way. He wasn't hobbling anymore and it was a dull ache but mostly from net-burn, and they all three of them stopped at Nicki's to take a breather before they went their own ways. "Fuckin shame that was a bust," Ike said, flopping down on her couch. He lifted his foot to unlace his boot but didn't have the energy to even bother taking it off, letting it drop again. "Those goddamn Sunface kids. I didn't think that one from the Home Depot got away. Or I didn't think she'd drum up her own damn children's crusade. Just our luck we pissed off the overachiever in the bunch."

He could hear himself rabbiting on, and maybe that was normal, or maybe it was a cover. His skin was burning, itching, at the thought of a bunch of teenagers getting the drop on them. If it had been one of his raiders missing something that badly, Ike would be going over the replay in his head to pinpoint where it went wrong. But he couldn't do it, for himself. Everything was a big mass of jumble, unsortable, tangled up and perplexing.

Something hadn't quite let go of Orion during their entire trip back to Redwood. They'd been mostly quiet on the way back, none of them in the mood for jokes or banter after their failed raid. The majority of their hike back to town, Orion had turned what had happened over in his mind. It was what he'd been taught. Where there was failure, there was a reason. They'd clearly messed up badly enough to the point that a bunch of youths had gotten the drop on them.

So, when Isaac spoke, sprawled out on the couch, Orion turned to look at the head raiders tired out face. "It could have been a successful raid." That was what he'd been working on the entire way back. The reason for their failure. And that was a problem - they shouldn't have failed. "We should have known there were people in the area once we saw the fresh paint. We should have been more cautious." That was a mistake all of them had made - all of them had dismissed the freshly sprayed wall as nothing, even if Orion had felt uneasy about it, and Nicki had clearly been bothered by it as well. Only Ike hadn't.

"You didn't suspect anything about the paint, Isaac."

Ike blinked. He felt like he should get up, or even sit up more, but he didn't; half slumped out on Nicki's sofa, trying to glare at Orion but just managing to grimace, screwing his eyes shut tight. "What? I dunno. I mean you guys didn't stop for it either. It's not like I'm perfect, for fucksake. I'm allowed a flub here and there."

The thing was ... no, he wasn't. There were situations that were unplannable-for, there was shit that caught them by surprise that nobody could've seen coming. The fresh paint, the symbol motifs, they'd been enough that both Nicki and Orion had remarked on them. They were the basics of raiding. Ike would never have a raider who'd blow off something that evident a tip-off.

But still, he resisted. And in the worst, most kneejerk, juvenile way: "I didn't do anything wrong."

Orion blinked at Isaac, noticing the other man's resistance, which only made the raider furrow his brows in turn. It was normal for raiders to work out what had gone wrong during a mission. Admittedly, most of the time they did so quietly, drawing what they needed to learn from their experiences for the next raid, so it wouldn't happen again. But something was off about Isaac's response. He was upset. Maybe about the failed job, maybe about something else.

"Nicki and I were bothered by it. We shouldn't have dismissed it, though." Orion had to look down at Isaac from where he was standing, the wall pressed up against his back. He could feel some of the exhaustion tugging at his own muscles. "You didn't stop to think about it. You normally don't miss that something is off." Orion's gaze held no accusation, his demeanor shifting from unaffected to gently worried. "Has something happened?"

Nicki had, for the most part, stayed pretty quiet during this whole thing. Ike had taken up residence on her couch and she was in the process of changing into her lounge clothes. She didn't mind that the two men were in there - they had both seen her naked before.

After hearing Ike's response to Orion, she couldn't stay quiet for much longer. "Arbolito is right." The oversized t-shirt was practically hanging off of her shoulder at this point but she didn't bother to fix it as she sat down next to Ike on her couch. "You don't miss things. Not signs of people in the area and definitely not a net trap."

As Orion posed his question she ran her fingers through his hair to massage his scalp. "We're just worried about you, Papi."

Ike shied away from Nicki's touch like a skittish horse, scooting to the edge of the sofa where he shoved himself into the corner, glaring daggers at them both. "You don't need to be worried about me," he said, his voice just a little too loud, abrasive at the edges. "I'm fine. It's fine. I'm always fucking--"

But the protest dried up in his throat. They were quietly looking at him, two of his dearest people in the world, in his whole entire life, with soft concern in their eyes; these two who'd been with him on so many raids, forging through danger and looking to him to protect them, to listen to them, to sort through and make decisions, to support them through whatever came. They deserved him to do the same, now that his turn had come to be supported. They wanted to help.

"I'm not," Ike said, "I haven't ... felt the same. Since it happened." He gestured at the scar on his head, mostly healed, his cropped-down hair starting to grow back enough that it wasn't so visible and livid anymore. "I know that's normal. I know it's normal even to keep thinking I can smell the fucking thing, that everyone can smell it, god it fucking stank when Renee was burning it shut, it was..." Ike trailed off, blinking wetly at the ceiling.

"You two know me better than almost anyone," Ike said. "You know it doesn't bother me if people don't like me, or understand why I do what I do. But this is the first time since Redwood that somebody..." He sat up a little, looking at them again. "She lied to me about what she was looking for," Ike said. "She maybe did want the flu vaccines, but what she was really after was asthma inhalers." He gave a huffing, incredulous laugh. "Can you believe it? I spent three weeks running my ass off trying to find a clinic or a medical centre that might have viable vaccines, you know how rare that shit is now. We coulda hit up five grade schools easy and carted her back two hundred abandoned inhalers without breaking a sweat."

Nicki's hand froze in midair when Ike pulled away and she masked the hurt in her gut when he did. But it only further proved her point - something was wrong with Ike. So his insistence that he was fine was the loudest, most obvious lie she had ever heard from him. And she wasn't buying it. That much was obvious in the look she gave him. It was much like the look he gave her when he saw through her when she wasn't okay, even when she insisted she was fine.

But finally and thankfully, Ike stops trying to pretend like he's okay. He gives in and starts to talk and Nicki sits back, pulling one of her legs under her while the other dangled off the edge of the couch. She remained silent, only pulling her gaze away from Ike to check on Orion. Orion would probably be better suited to say something more soothing and sensical than she could. Comforting was - well, she was bad at it, but she was trying. "Was it the lying that got to you, Ike? If so, I can go give her a piece of my mind and don't think I won't."

"No. I don't think Renee understands much about what raiding's about and how much work it takes and how dangerous it is. And that's fine, I don't want the normies knowing what we do, because they wouldn't be able to live with it." Ike shook his head, pleating his fingers over his midsection and tapping them as he spoke. "Her lying to me is because she doesn't respect me enough to know that I wouldn't, I dunno, make fun of her for needing something to keep her kid healthy." He waved that aside. "It's not even that she ran into that clinic without me clearing it first. She's not used to being out past the wire. Whenever I take a normie out there, that's a possibility, that they'll do something boneheaded by accident. Although Renee did it because I hurt her fee-fees by saying she was rich and privileged."

Orion had been listening quietly and carefully to Isaac, the low rumble of his sometimes stumbling voice. While Nicki had scooted close to the head raider, Orion had remained where he was, near the door, standing awkwardly with the wall almost pressed up against his back. Watching, carefully, as Isaac's face shifted from defensive anger to vulnerability, anger and a somewhat frustrated, yet resigned sadness. Orion found something in his chest tug, the muscles constricting to the point that it felt painful beyond the physical. "You're hurt." Orion states before finally putting himself into motion. Stepping through the room towards the couch and, in lack of space, settling himself down beside of it, on the floor.

"Renee is a doctor. So she knows how accessible inhalers are and how hard it is to find vaccines. She should have considered that. What she did was careless and thoughtless. And you almost died." Orion's brows were furrowed as he speaks, his eyes warm and full of concern, now shown unhindered as he reached up to grasp Isaac's hand. Thin bones pressed up against his palms. "Is that one of the situations you were trying to get away from?"

Nicki glances to Orion as he moves toward Ike. He speaks what is pretty obvious and Ike could try to deny it all he wanted, but he was. Any person could see that. Well, any person who knew Ike. She thinks to reach out and give Ike's hand a squeeze but considering how he pulled away from her she thinks against it. Besides, Orion and Ike were more of a thing than the two of them and that was fine. But still, she couldn't help but feel slightly disheartened when Ike had pulled away or how far away he was from her on the couch. Orion could be his rock to ground him. He seemed to get through to Ike much better than she ever could.

"Yeah," Ike said to Orion's question. "Well, it's a bunch of things, but that's one of 'em." Orion's hand holding his was nice, comfortable, so Ike reached blindly out for Nicki's, too. "I'm not ... I'm not hurt like, feelings-wise. Renee's never liked me, even though I haven't really done anything bad to her, but that's just how it is. I don't take that shit on board. I'm ... rattled." Ike drew a breath, his grip on them both tightening. "She lied about what she needed. She ran in to the clinic without me clearing it. Both of those things I could chalk up to her not knowing what raiding entails and what we do out there."

Ike fixed his stare on a spot on Nicki's wall, a little divot where she'd maybe swung something too hard and accidentally dinged it, or maybe it had been there when she moved it. "She hurt her leg," he said. "I asked her to patch it up and she wouldn't listen. When we were getting out of there I gave her crutches to use so we could escape faster and she wouldn't use them. I'm ready to buy it, any day that I'm out there; that's what we all make peace with, us raiders. But I never expected somebody from Redwood would willingly, insistently, put me in danger on purpose." Ike looked from one to the other, his expression faintly lost. "She's the town doctor. Her entire thing is about caring for everyone, caring and caring. But not me." He shook his head, cold fingertips digging into their hands. "Me, she told to do the town a favour and go back to work outside the gates."

The second Ike's free hand reached for her she took it and smiled. His hand was infinitely bigger than hers but she could still rub her thumb along his knuckles. She was bad at comforting but she was trying. And if she didn't know what to say, she could at least provide physical comfort.

But Ike was opening up and that was important. She was taking in everything he was saying. But his admission had left a bad taste in her mouth. "Hija de puta....I'm gonna give her more than a piece of my mind now. Who does she think she is?"

He gave one of his single-shoulder shrugs, squeezing Nicki's hand. "Down, girl. I know you both care but there's not really any point, is there? Renee already acts like I'm looking to tear a strip off her at any moment -- which I'm not -- but she's insistent that I give her some how-to manual about how she can square things with me." Ike shook his head. "She doesn't get it. She didn't like me this whole time and I worked with her just fine, I took her out to a store to get things for her kids, I stumped for her to be on the Council. The only reason she's so obsessed about it now is because she knows she fucked up." He harumphed a little. "Though she kept it under her hat till prom night, so she didn't feel that guilty, I guess."

Orion listened, quietly, as Isaac talked. Continued to be quiet and contemplating as Nicki bristled up with anger and growled a threat. Watched as Isaac called her down with that rough voice. Inside Orion's chest, something clenched, hard and painful to the point that it ached, making Orion squeeze the other man's hand in gentle assurance, his gaze fixed on the older man's hollowed out, exhausted face. "You didn't deserve that." Orion muttered, his voice gentle as his thumb caresses the age-spotted, thin skin of Isaac's hand. Of course, the head raider knew that he didn't, but it was what came to Orion's mind.

He took in a long breath, letting the air escape through his knows as he regarded the head raider with furrowed brows, before he spoke up again. "It was irresponsible of her. She endangered you. And it does not sound like it matters to her that she hurt you. She made you feel unsafe. Be unsafe." There was something else there, something that bothered him. "Isaac, did you go out because she told you to go out?" Orion's inquisitive gaze rested on Isaac's face. Normally, the head raider was responsible when it came to being injured, resting up when he needed to. And the headwound looked healed, the skin still pinkish and fresh. But Orion was not a doctor. "Were you cleared before you went out?"

Another single-shoulder shrug, and Ike answered in the short staccato way that he had when he didn't want to make a big deal out of something. "Not in so many words. Not by Val. But Renee's a doctor too and she made it pretty clear where I belong for the good of the town, so on a technicality, yeah."

Orion's brows furrowed in worry. That wasn't like Isaac, either. "She shouldn't have said that. That was irresponsible, too." Orion pulled Isaac hands towards him, letting his fingers trace the outlines of his knuckles before pressing a kiss to them. He wasn't somebody who got angry easily. Even now he was calm, but it was there. An undercurrent, settling down beside the ache of sympathy. It showed in his eyes as he searched the older man's gaze, even as his demeanor was as calm as ever. "She was supposed to care for you. She sent you out when you were not fit to go out." Orion shook his head, softly. "Are you worried she is going to hurt you again?"

"No, I'm not worried about that. She didn't intend to hurt me in the first place, she just didn't really care if I did get hurt." Ike shut his eyes; their concerned faces were too much to take, for a minute.

"That's good." Orion quiets down after that, watching Isaac close his eyes and leaning back. Taking in the tired furrow of his brows, the way some of the energy seems to have been taken out of him, like someone had reached in and taken out a handful. The raider leaned forward, the tip of his nose brushing against Isaac's beard, a gentle moment of affection. "You look tired."

"I am tired. C'mere, the both of you." Ike held both his arms out to his sides, wanting Orion and Nicki bookending him on her sofa. "Look, I for sure don't want you taking Renee out anywhere, but I'm not saying you guys can't do whatever with her. Be her friends or have her as your doctor or anything. It's only out there on the job that I'm worried she might put you in danger without a second thought."

As Ike drew her in she curled into him and wrapped her arms around his shoulder. "Don't worry about us, Papi. We're gonna do what we need to always come back to you."

"All right." Ike drew them in close -- almost uncomfortably so, resulting in them all leaned up against and overlapping each other. "I guess I have been fucked up in the head over this. I should never have missed all that shit, all those warning signs. But I don't think I'm fucked for good." He mulled this over for a minute, then nodded decisively. "Yeah. I need to get back into the mix and it ... helped, telling you about what's screwing with me."

Nicki had to slide her arm between Ike and Orion as Ike pulled them in. The other arm was tracing thin, soft lines down his side. With her new position basically sandwiched between the men Ike couldn't see it but she was smiling. "I'm glad we could help. We're both here for you, whatever you need."

Orion followed Ike's pull. The couch was not quite big enough for them, so they were piled up against each other. The raider closed his eyes, letting his body relax into it as he nestled against Ike and Nicki. "That's good." He agreed, voice slightly muffled. "We want to help you. Always."

#with: orion #with: nicki #c: nic005 #c: ori004

2 notes · View notes