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bokettochild · 2 months

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if you want to pair wind with someone in "you weren't supposed to get hurt" how about complete the war trio pairings and give him and time some bonding. you have one of wars and time and wind and wars bonding so why not complete the trio?

Consider it done! No, like, actually consider it done, because I finally did do it T-T

Since you asked for me to complete the War Trio, it is Mask and not Time, but minor details, yeah? It's the same person in the long run.

Rating: General

Wordcount: 4,905

Summary: Tired of the new intruder, Mask turns to desperate measures to reclaim his personal space from the other so called hero that Link's become so taken with. Things do not go as planned. Or...well, sort of?

He didn’t ask for this.

No, seriously, Mask had never asked for this situation to ever come about. He's sort of given up asking anyone for anything at this point. The goddesses didn’t answer when he wanted to go back, to live the life he had finally begun to grow into, to see the kingdom he had saved and all the friends he had made and the world that was familiar even if it was damaged. No one listened to his wishes when he wanted to go home, only to find that the forest will no longer welcome even his child form. He’s tried; he can’t find the grove, or his siblings, or anything of his old life. Navi didn’t listen when he asked her to come back, and whatever powers existed in Termina didn’t listen when he begged for just one day to rest, or a bit of help, or really any bit of aid that didn’t cost him something.

Help doesn’t come for the asking. People only do things for you if they can get something out of it. Life is transactional, and for that reason alone at least, he finds he can respect the strange bunny merchant who’s joined their camp. At least Ravio makes no secret of what he wants, and unlike people who dance around the subject or expect him to know, Ravio states his terms point blank.

Link does not.

The captain is hard to read, hard to understand. He’s the hero, so maybe he can give without getting and maybe he can serve without reward, but that only counts when it’s for the kingdom. No one asked him to reach out to the displaced figures transported through time, to try and befriend them and make them feel at home. There’s no advantage to him doing so, no payout, and it just doesn’t track. Still, Captain Link tries, and he’s succeeding too. Even despite all attempts to keep the man out, he’s somehow made it past Mask’s defenses with that warm smile and the twisting of his own mother tongue.

Maybe it’s the spark of familiarity in those blue eyes. They glitter and gleam like Navi did, and the fae-speak that this mortal hylian man can somehow understand and respond in, scolding and commanding, but also assuring and offering warmth, makes him feel almost at home. Maybe it’s the magic though. He doesn’t think Captain Link knows, but he can feel the tendrils of warmth and strength, a protective magic that weaves over camp as the captain walks and inspects; not unlike a spider spinning a web. It’s different from the Deku Tree’s magic, but similar too. The signature of the setter is the only real change, and the warmth and security of at last being able to bask in that web of safety maybe is the reason he lowers his guard.

That’s how the man got in, lulling him into safety and familiarity, a whisper of those lost in that perfect smile, and then Mask was trapped.

Love is a dangerous thing, but somehow this man has managed to get ahold of his heart anyways, and he’s holding onto it with such warmth and kindness, protecting it so carefully, that there’s really nothing the once-again-child hero can do, only surrender and accept his defeat.

He didn’t ask for Captain Link to adopt him, but he never opposed it either.

Maybe he would have, but the man had sat him down and explained that the reason wasn’t because they found him incapable, and that it was still very much his own choice, but that without an assigned guardian who would take charge of keeping an eye on them, all children displaced across time would be sent to the countryside to stay on farms, out of the way of the danger, at least until the war was over. If he wanted to stay, he had to agree to let an adult become his guardian, and Link had offered his own services for his consideration.

Saying ‘no’ wasn’t really an option. If he wanted to help, he needed to say ‘yes’. Besides, maybe having some tangible proof that someone wanted him around, was tied to him in some way, was nice. It wasn't a Claim like fairy’s laid, but in the way of Hylians, it was really somewhat similar. He became Link’s son, and while the captain never pressured him to see it that way, there’s a small part of him that finds pride in that.

Now if only Link hadn’t done the same thing for the blasted sailor.

Link has a soft spot for kids, and that much is clear. He’s accepted that Mask is older in mind than body, but it’s clear that the child-like appearance does get the better of the man and make him forget at times, and it shows. Also, busy as he is, Link always makes time for all their youngest members of camp, making sure they are handling the events around them well. He’s had help, of course, since Marin and Ravio both make an effort to check in on everyone for him at times, and the island girl in particular is very good at handling them all, including him. Mask blames that weakness on the fact that she looks a little like Malon did when they were adults.

Even with all his duties though, it’s clear the captain finds solace in the presence of children, and privately, Mask does think that, maybe once the war is over, Link should settle down and start a family. For now, he doesn’t mind that the man who adopted him likes to be around the actual kids in the camp, letting Agatha talk his ears off about insects and entertaining Skull-kid's games and tricks. No, in a way, he finds it cute how much Link cares about them.

The problem is the sailors. Tetra isn’t so bad; she’s fun and clever and good at what she does. Impa’s taken charge of keeping an eye on her, for reasons that she won’t explain, so there’s no worry about Link trying to take her in. Her hero companion is a different story though.

Because Link is the one everyone calls when there’s a newly dropped outsider discovered, he’d been there when they’d found the sailor folk. Because the captain has a bleeding heart, he’d immediately offered a place to stay in his own tent for the younger hero, which is all well and good to start with, because Link is nothing if not hospitable. No, the problem isn’t that Link had invited Tune, it’s that Tune doesn’t go away.

What, for a short time, had been his and Link’s space, suddenly has another person in it. Where Link is content to sit quietly and work at their respective tasks, Tune chatters. Where Link will, at the least, humor him about being an adult, Tune flat out doesn’t believe him. Everything he’s just begun to get used to is suddenly changing! He can’t lower his guard anymore, and if he wants to cuddle up to the man who’s legally his father, he can’t without someone seeing and taking it as proof that he’s a child, or that he’s soft or weak or some other offensive presumption. Worse than that though, is that Link treats Tune with the same warmth and kindness that he does Mask, and try as he might to deny it, it’s become increasingly clear that he can’t stand that.

So yeah, Mask is jealous.

He doesn’t like to admit it, but he is, and he doesn’t like that Tune tromps all over everything he was just making for himself and pushes himself into the space that had finally started to feel like home. His relationship with Link is a treasure, and Tune is trying to be part of it, and Link is just letting him! Link took him in, took guardianship over him and now he says that that makes the two of them brothers.

Mask has had brothers before. He doesn’t want new ones. He’s still getting over not ever getting to see the ones he used to have ever again, still getting used to the idea that maybe in their own way, they’d actually felt something for him, despite all the bullying and mockery. He doesn’t want another older brother, one who doesn’t believe him about anything he says and who, worse yet, Link looks at with respect.

There's no shortage of warmth and fondness in Link’s eyes when they turn on him, but when turned on Tune, there’s suddenly some sense of equality, of respect. Tune offers advice and Link takes it, Tune offers help and Link accepts, Tune tells Link to put his things down and rest for a bit and Link does. Mask doesn't have advice or suggestions or really any concept of how to help the man who’s taken him in besides killing monsters. He can’t do anything or give anything back to the person who’s giving him everything, and here Tune shows up and shows him up! Giving and giving and giving and making Mask look like some pathetic mooch! Well, no more! He doesn’t want to have the other around, so maybe it’s time to let that on!

The insults and fighting just stress Link out and saying point blank that he doesn’t want the other boy in their tent just makes the captain sigh and sit them down and explain things and beg them to just try and co-exist. The number of times he’s said that he ‘isn’t asking them to be friends, but just to please get along, or just ignore each other’, is getting ridiculous. Yet, every time, Tune nods and smiles and, like the goody two shoes he is, promises to do his best, apologizing for stressing Link out.

He’s such a suck up, honestly! Mask can’t stand it!

So, instead of involving Link, instead of letting the hylians handle things their way, Mask is going to take the fairy approach to getting this kid out of his space.

It’s not hard to figure out. Skullkid, like always, is down for a bit of mischief, and the fairies he presents with his situation agree to be of aid in any way they can. It won’t affect anybody else. He’d had to steal something out Tune’s bag so that the fairies could get a handle on his magical signature, but that’d been easy enough, and the fairies were well willing to help once he’d bribed them with sugar that he’d snitched from the mess tent.

Now though, he can walk back to the tent knowing that no matter what Tune does, he’ll get lost trying to find it. It’s the same magic from the woods, less strong, since it’s not done by the Deku Tree, but it’s only supposed to work on one person anyways, so it doesn’t need to be that strong, just strong enough to make sure Tune can’t get back in. Except, much to his disappointment, the only result is that the older boy just follows Link around instead! So, when it’s late, he only has to keep an eye on the captain, and thus is still there, every night, humming and talking as dinner is made and eaten, and even afterwards sometimes. Gone is the silence they used to share, filled instead with the voice of the ‘brother’ he never asked for.

So, he tries again. He asks the fairies, he asks Midna, he even tries talking to Ravio to ask him if maybe, somehow, there’s something in the merchant’s wares that could fend off unwanted persons from someone’s space.

“Bees,” the merchant responds, sighing. “Wards and runes too, but those are tricky to lay if you’re not practiced, and unfortunately, I’m not. Mister Hero keeps bees though, and nothing and no one can get at his home without first having to get through them.” There’s a shiver that follows those words, a full body one that makes the rabbit ears of the hood bounce and sway. “Awful, horrid little devils they are!”

Were they in the woods, he’d start gathering hives and fostering bees all around the area, or at least try and learn how. They’re not in the woods though, and Captain Link likely won’t appreciate having a hive anywhere near his tent. Midna suggested getting a dog, but when he’d explained why he wanted it, she’d told him she couldn’t help any further.

��I don’t want any part in a sibling tiff,” she’d declared, and he hadn’t had time to explain that they weren’t siblings before she’d flickered off to another part of camp, most likely to pester Marin.

So, he tries again, and again, and tries everything he can think of, but even with all that he’s still left with an unwanted presence in their tent and evenings that are too loud and food too spicy. He wants Tune gone; not dead, that wouldn’t be right, but out of his hair and his space and away from himself and Link would be nice. Why, oh why couldn’t someone else have taken in the other supposed hero? But no, Link and his bleeding heart just had to take him, and now Mask suffers the consequences of it!

Well, no longer! Because Skullkid has a solution!

“A trap!”

“A trap?” He’s fond of the kid, very much so, but he’s not sure how smart the guy is. “Buddy, I’ve tried that.”

“You tried a magic trap,” Skullkid corrects, giggling, “but magic only works on magic. You’re working like a fairy against a hylian! You need to use hylian skills to stop a hylian!”

“Explain...”

“Hylians are bad at magic, very dumb sometimes.” The hat of the skullkid bobs with a knowing nod as he speaks, smile conspiratory. “He doesn’t know you’re trying to get rid of him. You need to leave no question about it! Trap him, then, after some time, come get him out! You can tell him he owes you for rescuing him, or that you set it, but you can trap him and make him realize he’s not so great!”

Technically, there are so many ways in which it wouldn’t work, but he’s already tried so much, so it’s worth a shot. Skullkid is willing to help with the rigging of it too, with just enough magic to stop the thing going off on anyone else, and employing the spell already on the tent. The older boy will end up at the back rather than the front, and when he does, he’ll fall into a rather deep hole that is spelled so no one will hear him until Mask or Skullkid come to see how he’s doing. It’s no harm done, just a quick scare and a moment to really drive home that staying in their tent is really not worth all the trouble he has to go through to do so.

For the first time in a long time that night, he manages to get Link to himself for a bit. Just quiet, dinner, no chatter, no spicy food, no blabbering and humming hero boy who doesn’t respect his space.

And then Link starts to worry. “Where’s Tune?”

He shrugs. “With Marin? They hang out a lot.” It’s not a lie. “Maybe he’s staying with her instead.”

Link shakes his head, face creasing up in a frown. “No, no, he would have told me.” With that, the man moves to stand, already grabbing for his sword and shield, things he never lets out of reach even when sleeping. “I’m going to go look for him. Stay here, in case he comes back on his own.”

Because Link is too tired to have realized the presence of the spell that keeps his other charge from being able to find the tent. He just thinks Tune follows him around, and he’s not all wrong either. Honestly, that’s probably one of the worst ways that plan had backfired, since it meant those two spent more time around each other. But no more!

The moment Link is out of the tent and out of sight, all smiles for his men even if his brow is tense, Mask is darting out and around the back, headed towards their trap.

Sure enough, Tune is inside. Dirty, tears on his face and cradling an arm that even past his green tunic, Mask can see is horrbly swollen.

“Shit.”

“Language,” the older answers, as if on reflex, before starting and staring up at him. “Wait, Mask?”

He wanted to smirk here, to crow a little at the stupidity it would take to get here, but Tune looks so pathetic, and pained. He’s not supposed to look pained. “Yeah...”

“Oh thank the seven!” Blue-green eyes dart skywards. “Someone set a trap by the captain’s tent! I’ve been calling for hours now, but no one’s come!” There’s a hardness in those eyes, a set to the jaw and brows that echoes the captain’s but a moment ago. “I’m glad Link wasn't the one to find it, but we need to tell him about this! If someone’s setting traps in camp, everyone is at risk!”

Something in his stomach curls and twists uncomfortably as he looks down at that determined face, streaked with tears and mud, yet still, the other boy is focused more on the men, the captain, and everything other than himself. He’s not even realized this was for him. Worse still-

“You’re hurt.”

A wince follows the words, although it tries desperately to be a smile. “Yeah. I think I broke my arm when I fell. Where’s Link?”

“Looking for you.”

He broke his arm. He got hurt. That wasn't part of the plan! He was supposed to get upset, but not...not... Mask’s not sure what he wants here, but this isn’t it. He got Tune hurt. Not just scared, not just lost, not just feeling stupid, but really actually hurt!

The sailor groans. “We have to tell him about this.”

“Do we?”

“Yes?” Like it’s a no brainer, like it’s obvious. “Someone set a trap in camp, Mask. One by his tent! That’s kind of a big deal!”

He knows that, but he doesn’t say it. He didn’t want Link involved though, and now Tune will pull him in and there will be a ruckus, because no one would guess that it was the sailor who was the target. Tune isn’t anyone worth targeting, not when Link is right there!

“But what if it wasn’t for him?”

“Who the-” and he cuts himself off, because Tune sees him like a child, treats him like a child, and refuses to swear in front of him, even though he knows perfectly well that the sailor’s got a mouth filthier than his own. Not for any lack of trying on his part, but Navi never let him stick around when people were using foul language, and he’d never gotten the chance to learn many words. Not in Hylian anyway. “Who would it be for then?” Because he knows too, he knows they aren’t good targets. Mask can’t tell him the truth though.

“Someone else?” It sounds desperate, een despite all effort to not.

“Who else-” and he sees something flicker, like lightning almost, in those sea storm eyes. “Did you do this?”

The accusation stings, but it’s also a sharp blade of truth, and it breaks the dam he didn’t even know was building up. “You weren’t supposed to get hurt!! I just...I- You- I don’t want you around!”

A slow blink, a heavy, deep, dangerous breath, like a dragon about to breath fire, but no flames, no words, emerge. Tune just stares, eyes stormy and cheeks red and shoulders stiff, and Mask feels himself beginning to cower just slightly as guilt mixes with the anger stirring up inside him.

He feels the need to explain himself, yet also the wish to shout and scream and rage at the intruder who disturbed the life that was finally beginning to settle. He’s not sure what exactly he’s feeling most, but it’s making his heart pound and hands sweat as he stands over the hold in the ground and the hero inside. It twists inside as he watches Tune watch him with dangerous eyes, all while cradling his broken arm. The words don’t come. The words won’t come, and he can’t decide whether he wants them too or not, just finds himself staring as Tune breathes, heavy and harsh for a while before finally mustering himself, forcibly calm, and turning sea-green eyes up towards him again.

“You set a trap.”

He doesn’t answer.

Tune doesn't wait for one. “For me. You tried to trap me, and leave me here for, what? An hour, a couple?”

He clenches his hands into fists, heart racing and face twisting up in the same way his stomach does; painful and confusing.

“Why?” The sailor blinks up at him. “What on earth did I do?”

You took from me, he wants to say. You took away my safe space, you made it yours. You broke what I found and made it what you wanted. You shoved yourself in where you didn’t belong and made me feel out of place. “You stole Link.”

For a moment, the other flounders, like a fish out of water, and then his voice explodes with a sharp “What?”

“You took Link!” He says it firmer this time. “We were fine, happy almost. I was happy! And then you came in and changed things and you- you-” he kicks at a clump of dirt on the edge of the pit, watches it roll away and crumble like he wishes the complicated feelings inside of him would do. “You took him away.” It’s softer the second time, just a whisper, a weak little thing that he hates.

“You’re jealous?” The anger is gone now, just...confusion in that face. “Are- are you seriously just... jealous?”

“No!”

And Tune stares, blinking up at him, bewildered. “You’re jealous. You, who Link thinks the world of and adores like his own son, are jealous.”

“I am his son!” Where in the world did that come from?!?!?!

A sigh and the shake of the head. “Okay, get me out. We’re going to talk.” Before he can resist, that stormy sea stare turns up to him again, warning. “If you don’t want me telling Link what you did, then we talk it out without him.”

“Gonna be hard to hide it,” he mumbles, even as, reluctantly, he offers a hand to help get the other out. It’s not that deep, the magic is really the only thing keeping Tune there, and now that he’s here, it dissipates quite easily, not halting the older boy’s climbing out at all. “Your arm’s going to give it away.”

“Help me set it,” is the easy answer. “I can down a potion and Link will be none the wiser.”

Mask stares. “You’re not going to tell him?”

Those deep eyes roll, a heavy puff of air escaping chaffed lips. “I mean, I can if you really want. I’ll tell him you got jealous and trapped me in the ground and that I broke my arm while falling down and-”

“Okay, okay! I get it! I’ll help.”

He does too. They both go back to the tent, and with a fair bit of struggle, they manage to set the broken arm just like Link’s shown them how, tying it to a splint made of a wooden spoon to hold it until the potion takes effect. The moment they’re done though, he’s stuck under that Stare again. It's not nearly as bad as Link’s, but it isn’t fun either.

“Alright, so, what made you think trap was a good idea?”

And... and... he tells him. It all sort of bleeds out in a messy amount of word vomit; the frustration and anger and everything. How he’s not keen on having a brother, how he didn’t get a choice or a warning, how its not fair! And Tune just listens, digesting the words quietly as though they aren’t mean and spiteful, as though he doesn’t sound like Mido when he says them. If Saria could see him now she’d be shaking her head, sad and sorry, probably wondering how he turned out like such a rotten little thing even after how hard she tried to teach him to be good and kind. It’s only when he finishes that the sailor says anything, and even then, it’s not even angry.

“I get it.”

He wants to scream that no, no one does!

But the sailor smiles, a crooked, sad thing. “Change sucks.”

The words hit home. Like they’re everything he was trying to say but couldn’t, and he just finds himself nodding in answer.

“I’m sorry I stress you out, but look at it from my perspective,” stormy eyes are clearing, gentling, like a cool and flat lake, “I don't have anywhere else to go either.”

“Someone else could take you!”

A shrug. “Yeah, they could. But no one else wants to. You’re not the only one who doesn’t want me taking up their space. Not that I blame them; if I was you I’d probably be pretty pissed too, but yeah. Anywhere else, I’m going to be treated like a child, like a kid, not like a hero who knows what he’s doing, who killed Ganon, who did stuff that they’ll never really get. Link doesn’t even get it yet, he’s not there, but he’s the closest I’ve got to someone who knows what it’s like to live our life.”

Mask pauses. “Our life?”��

And there’s that blasted smile again. “Yeah. You? Me? We’re heroes. We beat Ganon, we won, and we went home afterwards. It changes you a lot, and I don’t think most people get that, which is good, because that means they never had to deal with the shit we have, but it does make it hard to find people who understand you. Honestly, I was really excited to hear there were other heroes here, because I hoped maybe we could...” and there’s a faint flush back to the sailor’s cheeks again. He’d already downed the potion, he’s not crying anymore, and there’s no pain or anything, but he’s steadily getting redder.

“Spit it out already.” He doesn’t mean it to come out harsh, but it does, huffing out as he keeps his arms folded tight in front of him.

Tune sighs. “I hoped maybe I’d find a friend. Someone who really understands.”

“Must suck, huh?”

Another shrug, a tip of the head. “Yeah. But I get it if you don’t want to. I did intrude on your space, and I am sorry for that. I wish you’d told me it was bothering you though, instead of trapping me like a wild pig.” He has no clue what that means, but he lets it pass, for now. “We could just have sat down and talked about it. You say you’re an adult, right? Well, adults talk about shit that makes them upset, so we can do that instead of...whatever that was.”

And it’s not perfect, not friendly and not warm and not a sweet sappy thing like maybe Tune would have wanted, but they do talk. There’s a lot of prodding and pushing, and a lot of yelling, but eventually, they work out something. No one agrees to leave, but lines are drawn. Tune agrees to keep his spices away from Mask and only share if Link asks (which he probably won’t, considering it’s Link). Mask agrees to keep his traps and tricks to himself. If one of them is in the tent, the other needs to make sure it’s okay to come in, unless it’s time to sleep or they’ll be out again quickly. There’s more to work out, and they’ll have to do this a few more times, Tune tells him, but it’s a start.

When Link comes back, he doesn’t suspect a thing. Or, if he does, he doesn’t ask. A question of if Tune is okay, a hair ruffle, and then one for Mask too, and then he’s urging them both to bed for the night. Being tucked in is childish, but they accept it. They accept it and they sit quietly while the older hero collapses on his own bedroll and goes out like a light, still fully dressed.

“He’s a great guy,” the sailor whispers once they’re sure the man won’t wake.

Mask nods. “Yeah.”

“We can do this, for him. Even if you don’t like me, and I don’t like you, we can at least make his life a bit easier by not trying to kill each other.”

“Deal. Now shut up.”

He thinks the other giggles to himself, but no more words are spoken between them. Well, not that night anyway. They have to talk again later, once there’s not the threat of Link walking in on them. It’s not perfect and there are hiccups; there are still yelling matches and squabbles and sometimes it gets a bit more physical, but for Link, they make it work. The least they can do is support their fellow hero as he prepares to face the same hell they know. Although, it really doesn’t feel that way with how intent he is on watching out for them, like he really is their dad or something.

#asks and answers #linked universe #linkeduniverse #febuwhump2024 #febuwhump #ketto writes #lu time #lu mask #lu wind #lu tune #lu warriors #war trio #war of ages

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deadsetobsessions · 2 months

Text

Sea Cryptic! Danny AU- Pt.4

[Pt.1] [Pt.2] [Pt.3][Pt.5][Pt.6][Pt.7]

Danny was sitting in the back, his backpack obnoxiously taking up the seat next to him, when the door to the lecture hall creaked open near silently.

“What are you in here for?” Danny asked the guy who crept into class. He sympathetically took his backpack off the Seat of Shame and allowed the guy to sit down. Funnily enough, they had the same hair and eye color.

“Gen Ed. Undecided. You?” The guy grunted quietly back.

“Environmental studies. I’m Danny.”

“Tim.”

With the implicit understanding of two people in a required class they could not give less than two fucks about, Tim and Danny tuned back into the lecture. When the class was assigned group work, Danny looked over to see Tim softly snoring, head slammed down on the table.

“Tim. Wake up, dude.” Danny poked his shoulder.

“Huh? Class over?”

“Nah, we got group work. Discussion board.”

“Oh shit, thanks for waking me up. Wanna team up?”

Danny shrugged. “Sure. We should aim to post it in the middle so the professor doesn’t read our answers to the class.”

“Yeah, sounds like a good idea. Any idea what we’re talking about?”

“Kind of?”

“Good enough for me.”

——

Tim Drake kept seeing Danny Fenton around on campus.

“Danny! Dude, what are you doing?”

Danny turned, gloved hands full of crumpled trash. “Picking up after the student population, apparently.”

“Didn’t think environmental studies was that serious.”

“Global warming is very serious, you jerk,” Danny smirked at him, crossing the grass to put the trash into the trash can. “Reduce, reuse, oil shouldn’t be spilled in water and all that.”

“Basic stuff,” Tim grinned. Nice, he basically had a friend past Bernard now!

They were friends, right?

“And yet humanity fails to comprehend it. Incredible. Incredibly stupid that is.”

“They get it. Major corporations just don’t care.”

Danny sighed. “True that. You on your way to your next class?” He took off his biodegradable gloves off (nitrile and nylon, baby!) and chucked them into the trash.

“I’ve got free time, actually. Prof cancelled for his daughter’s surgery.”

“Oh, shit, that’s rough! You wanna go downtown and join the strike?”

“A strike? What for?” Even as he asked, Tim hiked his bag higher onto his shoulder, ready to go. They fell into step as the two left campus.

“Apparently, Quillan Pharma was doing some shady shit at their manufacturing plants. I think it’s like killing kids, and pouring toxins into the ground.”

“Oh, shit.”

“Yeah. Oh! Poison Ivy’s gonna be there!”

Tim blinked. He casted a sideways look at Danny. Sure he’s been here long enough to know… but it couldn’t hurt to check. “You know she’s an eco-terrorist, right?”

“Okay, but like… people suck sometimes. And all she’s asking for is like don’t kill the planet. And she doesn’t do that whole mind control thing too much anymore! The Sirens are so cool. Plus, one of my best friends at home might actually kill me if I don’t try to get her autograph. Poison Ivy is like, Sam’s personal hero.”

Tim snickered. “Yeah, okay. Mind if one of my friends join? His name’s Bernard.”

“The more the merrier,” Danny nodded. “Ooo! Hot chocolate. Want some?”

Danny bought three drinks as Tim trailed behind, texting Bernard.

“He said yes.”

“Cool! We should meet up somewhere before the drinks get cold.”

Well, Danny got the autograph. Tim got a new friend, and Bernard got a drink from his crush.

——

“Oh, you’re the glowing dude that Batman always talks about!”

Danny blinked, eyes scanning the wing-like cape and the yellow emblem on the hero’s suit. Danny was indeed glowing, stars and nebulas freckling across neon green skin, and glowing hair the color of a white dwarf star, tinged with the blue from his ice core.

“I… have absolutely no idea who you are,” Danny lied, like a liar. He’s found a surprising niche of entertainment in messing with the local vigilantes and he’ll be damned if he missed this opportunity.

He heard a snicker from the comm lines as Red Robin visibly brushes it off.

“I’m Red Robin. Why are you picking up trash?”

“Picking up after you humans, apparently.”

The both of them blink, feeling a weird sense of déjà vu. A moment of awkward silence passed before they both shook it off.

“Are you here to help? No offense, but the track record for you people is terrible.” Danny strode over and grabbed a bag. He opened it, and shook it at Red Robin’s face. “See? Batarangs, these odd bird looking ones, the R’s. Seriously, pick up after yourselves!”

“Oh, woah, can we have these back?”

Danny yanked the bag back before Red Robin could get close. “Pay me. These were incredibly tedious to pick up. Especially the batarangs. I mean, I even found a whole bunch of old rusted ones in the middle of the bay. What did you do, dump an entire bag in there from the air?”

Red Robin sighed and took out a wad of cash, with tracking fluid all over it. Danny grimaced, smelling the odd scent on the money. “That’s not real cash. It smells off. Are you trying to give me counterfeits because you’re broke?”

Red Robin gaped, oddly offended. “No! They’re real!”

“Doesn’t smell like it. It’s stinkier than the trash. Go get the one with the money, the litterer. Tell him I’ll be back the next full moon. I don’t want to talk to you anymore.” Danny grumbled, disappearing on the spot to watch Red Robin flounder with the stack of cash and the piles of dead bodies on the shore.

“What the fuck even is my life these days?” Red Robin wondered out loud, stuffing the cash back into his pocket. He looked over the plastic wrapped bodies and slumped, sighing.

Oddly enough, Danny felt a sense of sympathy. Well, he’s not getting paid for sympathy. He’s not getting paid at all tonight, actually. Danny flew off, plunging once more into the depths of the significantly cleaner waters, and used his ice to scoop out oil stains.

Danny glanced around and sighed. He had a lot of work to do.

——

“So you’re saying he’s like a werewolf mermaid fae child immortal god thing, right?”

Bruce grunted.

“B, what the hell are you smoking these days? You know drugs are bad, right? Do we need Superman to give you that PSA?” Jason snickered.

Tim, massaging his arms from having to haul an ungodly amount of dead bodies, grunted. He’s so similar to Bruce that it gave the people currently in the cave hives.

“He said full moon. I don’t think we can track him with regular stuff. The bugs kept shorting out.”

“Oh boy,” Dick sighed. “Don’t fall off the spiral cliff, Tim. You’ve got midterms to think about so no stalking the guy.”

“Yet,” Tim shot back, changing out of his suit.

Bruce grunted, setting aside a huge stack of cash.

#let Tim Drake go to college you cowards #he got his GED in this one boys #let Tim fucking age #danny phantom #batman #tim drake #dc x dp #dcxdp #dpxdc #danny the tired college student #bamf danny phantom #siren au???#sea cryptic Danny #bro I had war flashbacks to discussion board group work #terrible why do I do this to myself #the batarangs in the middle of the bay was from when Bruce tried to kill the joker and himself #Danny: people just can’t clean up after themselves these days #sea cryptic! danny au

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