#unmarried

[yesterdaysprint]

The Wichita Beacon, Kansas, January 4, 1922

#1922 #1920s #kansas #manners #etiquette #history #vintage #historic #advice #letters #writing letters #messenger #tradesmen #tradesman #addressing letters #address #addressing #unmarried #madame #dear madame #dame curtsey #questionable advice

[bitchesgetriches]

A Guide to Sharing Finances with Someone Other Than a Romantic Partner

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#being single #sharing finances #unmarried #personal finance

[abybweisse]

I couldn't find a post that you have answered this ask before but, how in the world did claudia didn't change her name after getting married? And how the fuck does her children have her last name,not their father? Specially considering that this was victorian era and woman literally had no rights

Oh, I have lots of posts about this, including some asks.

She likely didn't marry

You see, if she had married Cedric, she would have likely become Mrs. Ros--. I'm not sure about this part, but she might have even been stripped of her title of countess. Not what would normally happen, if she married someone untitled (which I suspect about Cedric) but because the queen would be furious. I don't think the queen would allow Cedric to rise up to Earl.

Also take into consideration that servants had to get permission from their masters to marry, and, as the queen's watchdog, Claudia was a servant of the crown, not simply a random member of the peerage. Members of Victoria's household would need to ask for permission to marry, too, like Phipps, Grey, Brown (if he were even human, which I'm sure he's not), etc.

So, she either asked to marry Cedric, and the request was denied... or she knew it would never be accepted, so she tried to keep her relationship with him a secret. There's a slight chance there was a wedding ceremony that wasn't recognized by the church. The kids would have been scandalously born out of wedlock, either way.

Defying the queen in this way, as well as other ways (probably), is likely what gets Claudia killed when Vincent is only 15. It's like the queen waits until she thinks Vincent can handle the watchdog duties before she has Claudia deleted. And, to add insult to injury/death, it happens on a Friday the 13th, to symbolically tell Claudia (and remind anyone else who knows) that this is punishment for bearing children on a Friday the 13th (for a reaper). We know Vincent was born on a Friday the 13th, and I suspect Francis was, too. They are confirmed to be full siblings, after all.

The family tree that Sascha and Ludger view doesn't have anything to do with marriages. Just biological lineage. Technically, Claudia could have married someone else and then taken his name but then had an affair with Cedric. It's just that I don't think so, since her own father seems to be a Phantomhive. Due to her station and the Phantomhive legacy, Claudia might have been barred from marrying anyone (and taking their name). It's even possible that Victoria wanted the Phantomhives to die out, and Claudia kept that from happening. And, if there's an heir who can fill the role of watchdog, ah well. Guess we get another generation of watchdog.

I've also said before that I think Vincent and Francis/Frances were named in defiance of the queen. Vincent is a French name brought by the Normans, and it means "conqueror". Francis/Frances was also brought by the French, and it means "French-born" or "free". I'm reminded of how, in Ivanhoe, Cedric of Rotherwood was called a "Franklin" by the Normans, because he was a free man and landowner. In fact, he owned several slaves, including a swine herd and -- even more notably -- a jester (named Wamba). I'm also reminded that the "treasured" "Courage Badge" in Mother3 turns out to be the legendary "Franklin Badge" from earlier games in the series....

Anyway, I theorize that Vincent and Francis/Frances were named in defiance of the queen, perhaps looking forward to a time when the Phantomhives would be free from her control (and from her descendants).

#black butler #kuroshitsuji #cloudia phantomhive #claudia phantomhive #vincent phantomhive #francis midford #frances midford #undertaker #cedric k. ros #cedric k ros #cedric of rotherwood #ivanhoe #norman invasion #franklins #name meanings #out of wedlock #unmarried #anon asks #i answer #answered asks #may 1 2023 #mother3 #franklin badge #courage badge

[piekhana]

#life #being single #bachelor #spinster #unmarried #cat lady #cat #catlover #truth

[softgirlathome]

I feel defeated today. As i do every week, i went to the store to buy groceries. There were 3 men i never seen before.

They were large, stong looking men. No tatoos or peircings. Not married because they weren't wearing rings. They looked like cowboys from the past.

i followed them around the store to get them to notice me but they didnt ask me if i was single or talk to me or ANYTHING. I feel ashamed and embarassed but i can never get a good man to notice me.

I pray every day for a husband but God is always testing me. He is keeping me from the 1 thing i live for..

#sad story #ashamed #traditional girl #single #unmarried

[whats-in-a-sentence]

Unmarried women were forced into giving up their babies and bullied and belittled. Maternal benefits, food stamps and birth certificates were taken from unmarried mothers, and social workers lied to single mothers, saying that babies were 'on trial' with foster families, when they had been permanently placed. Mothers were declared unfit or confused and their babies taken away.

Pat King was a 15-year-old schoolgirl in Whitchurch, Shropshire, when the head teacher at her school told her parents that she believed the girl was hiding her pregnancy. Only three weeks later, Pat gave birth to a boy, and after two weeks of caring for him, she was ordered to hand him over to a social worker. 'My dad was there, quite firmly making sure I didn't make too much fuss. It's one of those things you never forget, just like it was yesterday.'

"Normal Women: 900 Years of Making History" - Philippa Gregory

#book quotes #normal women #philippa gregory #nonfiction #unmarried #forced adoption #bullied #trial period #foster family #benefits #food stamps #birth certificate #social workers #lying #teen parent #whitchurch #shropshire #pregnancy

[yourapple56-blog]

As a woman who never wanted children or marriage, I can fully relate to this.

#youtube #no children #unmarried

[postsecretsalone]

#postsecret #single #thirty #life #adventures #grateful #postsecrets #thirty flirty and thriving #no kids #no problem #post secret #unmarried #single life #not a wife #got no strife #ain’t no wifey #not yet #no rush #no regrets

[theunmarriedwidowdiaries]

08/08/2021 – The (Re)Beginning.

I’ve wrote dozens of journals before this one, and recently I’ve smoked more in a year than I should in my entire life due to my anxiety problem and the pandemic. In those other journals I described every terrific moment of my life in vivid details. All the anxiety crisis, panic crisis, about the nights I felt like I wouldn’t live to tell in the next morning. But here I am. Up, alive and breathing hundreds of mornings after.

I realized I’ve spent most of my life crying, feeling lonely and abandoned, completely afraid of the world outside my doors. And I won’t lie, I’m still terrified sometimes. But with this one I want to do different. I want to write about other things, good things. I don’t wanna waste words with the past anymore, and certainly I’m not gonna be hidden here forever and someday I’ll meet the world just as it is.

That’s what I wanna write about. The good aspects of my days, even the smallest or the greatest.

I realized that I have been wasting my youth grieving my traumas, exposing myself to suffering just because this is the only thing I know well while locked between the walls of my house and this horrible town I want so desperately to leave. I don’t wanna suffer anymore, and I realized how much I’m willing to fight against this overwhelming pain and open myself to new experiences in the real world.

I’m a writer since always, therefore I live inside my head most of the time, and by that I’ve been neglecting the material tangible and existing Brenda. A woman full of passion, lust, imagination and ambitions. I remember every line I wrote on that old journal, and I don’t want to be that girl anymore.

And I just decided that… I won’t be.

#diaries #daily #record #diariesdaily #unmarried #anxiety #neurodivergent

[baldbae-tele]

Dirty Thirty

It is four days until the big 30. I suppose I should be experiencing a degree of excitement ... Another day in the land of the living! Yes there is gratitude, but there is something else. There is a grave deal of disappointment and self critique. It has been crawling up my neck and stifling me. And the reminders and reprimands continue to flood in.

At 9-10 years old, I was certain that my dream job was to be a Carib girl, I had practiced the dance in front of the television with my aunty Kathy for every West Indies cricket match... "Go T&T, Show them what you've got....Go T&T, show them what you've got!" I felt like I was well equipped after all of these practices and well on my way with Aunty Kathy as coach...By 20 I would be in a gear to fulfill this childhood dream...but unfortunately, this never came to fruition. I realised that maybe I did not want to be a Carib girl anymore.

By 12-15 I was going to be a lawyer...The entire basis of this decision was that I like to argue...Thus, I would be the perfect fit for the profession because of course, there is no other basis to law beyond the ability to argue. LOL. By 25 I would have my own law practice and win all of my cases....Again wishful thinking.

When I got to university at 17 years old, to study Business Management, with an intended emphasis in Marketing...armed with my Procter and Gamble.... because obviously is that is the marketing bible. During Cape I trekked with that everywhere all over my high school. It was so bad my teacher used to borrow my textbook as reference for class. I was one of those students... YES.

Anyways...I clearly did none of those things...Flash forward, to returning to Trinidad and Tobago and finally finding my niche. I determined Psychology was what I really wanted to do with my life. After serving as a Resident Assistant in University, and dealing with many instances of youth crisis, I recognised that this was what I wanted to do...No NEEDED to work with people... I have always had a passion for people, in particular young people. I finally felt at peace at making this discovery. There...the decision was made. I was going to do my Masters in psychology which I started in September of 2019. The following year the pandemic hit... negatively impacting many things related to school. An experience which the world was never prepared for...

By 2020 is when the self critique began to rear its ugly head. I started to feel like I was choked and bound by own criticisms. With only a thesis left to defend, which had to be postponed due to illness, much to my displeasure because, "Ah just want to done!" I became very unforgiving and have been failing to offer myself grace.

I have adopted the following thought points:

Why it is you taking so long to figure out yuh damn life?

At 30 you were supposed to be married with an established career?

You have disappointed your family because you supposedly had so much promise.

What is wrong with you?

People often speak about the wrongs of comparing yourself to others. However, we need to have conversations around comparison to self...to our potential or perceived potential. This may be an even more toxic practice.

And there is something about 30 that makes us feel like we are running out of time...That we old. I assume that the four grey hairs I have managed to develop over the past few months may contribute to this....WAY DEY COME OUT FROM?

For this realisation and this reason...I have determined that 30 will be a year of forgiveness and grace. I have decided on allowing myself the opportunity to thrive as opposed to setting unrealistic deadlines for myself. I have decided to celebrate my wins and take the failings as a lesson. I have decided to cherish moments, and not hold them to my chest so that I cannot move past them.

I am determined to achieve my goals...but I am determined to release the timeline.

#dirty thirty #unmarried #grace #forgiveness #self forgiveness #self work #self worth #love #time #thirty flirty and thriving #30s #adulthood

[idiotlittleme]

I watched the talk of Michelle Obama and Oprah Winfrey gave on The Light We Carry (a book of Michelle) on Netflix today and in a side note they talked about how Oprah, with everything she has accomplished and been through still gets remarks on being childless and all. And it's been on my mind all day.

Cause at the beginning of the year, when my sister got engaged, I couldn't be 100% happy for her. I played it off as if I was, but I wasn't. I wasn't because I knew at that moment that this is it for me. Cause as if my parents hasn't already compared us all the time in a way that highlights how much she is "the better one"; now she got the all-time-goal - she is getting married, probably going to have kids in a few years, and overall just doing "the plan". And I don't think she does it because of them, I do believe this is what she wants, but this exactly where it gets complicated for me - because this is not what I want. I don't want to get married and I don't want kids. Which is like the WORST THING EVER for my parents. This is their faliure. I come from an Arab semi-religious family and this is the shit. I always knew this is how it is going to be and it still sucks. I know it doesn't matter how successful I am going to be with my career and personal life, as long as I don't get myself a husband and kids, this is it. I am a failure. And there is nothing I could do about it.

But then I heard Oprah, and you know, I never thought about her like that. I never thought of her as a childless and unmarried (although in a continuous committed relationship). She is Oprah - she is THE successful amazing women who built a fucking empire in her name. Not someone you would ask something like "why don't you have kids?".

And you know, it made me think how if focusing on other things makes me a little bit like Oprah Winfrey, than I guess it's not so bad after all.

#oprah winfrey #michelle obama #the light we carry #book #books #unmarried #childless #self acceptance #long post

[bitchesgetriches]

A Guide to Sharing Finances with Someone Other Than a Romantic Partner

If you liked this article, join our Patreon!

#being single #sharing finances #unmarried

[sogoodcontent]

Early Spring (1956)

#Early Spring #EarlySpring #Yasujiro Ozu #YasujiroOzu #unmarried #married #marriage #alone

[srndpt2024]

#unmarried #same sex #love is love #love of the future #men #moon #boots #moonbootica #music #electro #gay #lgtbq #celebrate #fish #pink #pride #smile #take care #Youtube

[howifeltabouthim]

Women who hadn't married by twenty-seven were labeled 'leftovers,' and women who were still single at thirty-five were 'rotten.' . . . Men who hadn't married by a certain age weren't called anything at all.

Celia Laskey, from So Happy for You

#double standards #social commentary #gender based discrimination #marriage #unmarried #single #social satire #sexism #quotes #lit #words #excerpts #quote #literature #male privilege #celia laskey #so happy for you

[girlzoot]

He had never married. Good double bass players, he told me, were men who made poor husbands. He had many such observations. There were no great male cellists—that’s one I remember. And his opinion of viola players, of either sex, was scarcely repeatable. —Neil Gaiman/Good Boys Deserve Favors/Fragile Things

#neil gaiman #good boys deserve favors #fragile things #creepy music teachers #unmarried