Five: OMG, YOU GUYS ARE SO FUCKIN-
Diego: if you stop yelling i'll give you a gold star.
Five: i-
Five: *sighs*
Five: *shuts up*
Diego: *puts a gold star on a five shirt* there we go.
Five: whatever.
Later:
Five: *looks at gold star*
Five: *starts crying on the floor*
Viktor:*peeping from five's room* *whispering* what did you do??
Diego: *whispering* i just gave him a gold star??
Viktor: *sighs*
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@darbydoo22
holy fuck.
the amount of people he’s had die that you could now imagine he died with but got to come back. and the fact that if he knew he’d be devastated that he got to come back and they didn’t
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Still not over the fact that Klaus’ perfect heaven was a farm with Dave THATS ALL HE WANTED and instead he got his stupid dad :(
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saw a post about how it was Dave who kissed Klaus first and i legitimately cried because this whole ass man was born and raised in the 50s and 60s and was probably told that gay = bad etc but still kissed this MAN in a disco. yeah it was slightly hidden but anyone could've seen and‼️he still did it because he loved Klaus goddamn‼️
he fell in love with a man in homophobic America during the pointless war of Vietnam
crying Dave Katz forever
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Sauna Klaus x Dave
Umbrella Academy smut 🍑🥵
Author’s Note: So, the other day, my husband told me about our town’s gay sauna and how there was a whole documentary about it. I didn’t ask him how he knew all this, but I did watch the documentary.
Anyway, then this happened.
All my other WIPs (Dead Sexy, Chained and High Altitude) are still ongoing and new chapters for each are coming soon - I just really needed to get this smut out of my system. (I’m sorry!)
Enjoy, filth fans! If you like it, leave me some comments and I will read them over and over while lying on my bed in the foetal position because they are my primary source of dopamine. 🧡🧡
Summary:
Dave goes to the sauna for the first time.
It goes… very well.
Snippet from Sauna:
He is beautiful - but not in the way a man is usually beautiful - in the way the Grand Canyon is beautiful. An awe-inspiring, breath-taking, all-encompassing beauty. His cheekbones and jawline are razor-sharp, his eyebrows thick and expressive, his eyelashes long, his goatee finely manicured, framing a wide, warm smile. He is so radiant, he’s almost painful to look at. Like the sun.
“Wow, you’re…”
“Invading your space, I know. I hope you don’t mind - I just have this damn tricky shoulder, I’m hoping the heat will help to loosen it up.” The man massages the top of his arm for emphasis.
Fuck, his arms are beautiful too.
Dave shakes his head “No, no, that’s fine.” He doesn’t really know what to do here, he’s been thrown off by that face, those eyes, those arms.
He panics and sticks out his hand. “I’m Dave, by the way.”
The man looks down at the proffered hand as if Dave just offered him a rubber chicken. Instantly, Dave realises his mistake; he has forgotten the primary purpose of places like these - anonymity.
A bemused smile crosses the man’s face, the kind one reserves for the quaint idiosyncrasies of a foreign tourist.
“A names guy, hey?”
It’s like Dave has suggested some new, weird kink and he’s deciding whether to go for it or not.
“Okay, then. I’m Klaus.” Klaus takes Dave’s hand and gives it a hearty shake. “Pleased to make your acquaintance.”
Read the rest on AO3
Tagging because I crave your approval: @badsext @softforklave @anglophile-rin @neist @maerenee930 @firstpersonnarrator @allisoooon @cemeteryklaus @super-unpredictable98 @pickledbeefwastaken @love-is-dirty-baby @rina-cydonia @inspiremeandsetmefree @jender123 @vonkimmeren @narnianaos @sylvertyger @merrilark @shaneen828 @spideyxalmighty @faceache111 @rob-private @pietro-t1me @not-oscar-wilde @squishitude @courtneytarynofficial @spookyfbi @kawaiic0mmunism @wcrmboy @yeah-klave @thislovelylife @kaufmann-6 @hullosweetpea @crisecardiac
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