#to celebrate they went on a nice little date in the city | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

artists-ally · 5 months

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{Show Me Where It Hurts} Azriel x Reader x Xaden Riorson

Sooooooo I had a thought. And then this happened. That's all I'm gonna say. Just two shadow daddies doing unspeakable things. Title inspired by this song. Enjoy!

Word Count: 7,238

Warnings: ACOTAR x Fourth Wing, alcohol, smut, MMF, Oral (m and f receiving), DP, dom/sub vibes, use of the nickname "pet", bondage, shadow play, degrading, spanking, choking, spitting, unprotected sex.

Tagging: @needylilgal022 @librafairy @cyrygher @agent-anna @thelov3lybookworm @blessthepizzaman @bubybubsters

Summary: After a miserably failed night out, you decide to head to a local bar to drink away your sorrows. Two males, one of them being your Court Spy Master, the other a stranger, approached you.

~~~~~

“Are you kidding me?” “I understand your frustration but-”

“My frustration?” I shouted, eyes wide. “What do you mean he did book a reservation?”

“There has been no reservation made under that name. I am truly sorry, Yn. But it looks like he may have… done it on purpose?”

“No,” I shook my head. I could not fathom being stood up let alone whatever this was. “No this cannot be right. I-I spoke with him this morning, he said that our table was reserved for tonight.” The hostess offered me a kind look as the realization slowly settled in my bones. “Oh my gods… he set me up.”

“If I were you,” the pretty Fae came around her stand and took my hands in hers. “I’d find a way to forget about that damned male. He clearly is undeserving of you or your kindness. I wouldn’t sweat it, a pretty one like you won’t go unnoticed for very long.”

I tried to smile, but a grimace was the best I could do. “I feel like such an idiot. Thank you for all your help…” I paused to look at the little tag on her black tunic. “Jasmina.”

“My deepest apologies, Yn,” Jasmina waved as I exited the restaurant and the bitter Velaris air nipped at my bare shoulders.

What a fucking lame excuse for a male. How dare he stand me up on a date? He was the one practically begging on his knees to ask me. I should’ve known better. Males like him do not like females like me.

In an attempt to not let the night–or the fierce outfit I put together-go to waste, I went a couple streets over to a tavern. It had a nice ambiance and a surplus of good liquor. The dark, rustic interior greeted me with a ploom of warm air and the scent of cheap ale and wine.

After hanging my coat on the rack at the front, I weaved through the rather crowded space to hopefully snag a stool at the bar. I was lucky enough to get one at the end, only one person to my left and the wall to my right.

I just sighed. What a shitty day. I had spent a few hours getting read, and for what? To be made a fool? To be embarrassed? I shouldn’t have to pay the consequences for something I didn’t have control over. I swear to the gods that if I ever see what’s-his-face again I’ll put my fist through it.

“Evening, milady,” the polished man behind the counter said. He had a thick beard and a mustache that curled up on the ends. He had a thick accent too, probably from somewhere in the hills. “Celebrating tonight?” “More like mourning,” I huffed, bracing my chin on my palm.

“Terribly sorry for your loss,” his eyes softened. “Oh,” I gave a chuckle. “No, not a death. I just came in from what was supposed to be a date. Turns out I was set up and he wasn’t going to be coming.”

The male scoffed. “The boldness from some of the males in this city.”

“Tell me about it.”

“What can I get for you?” He asked, wiping a few glasses down and setting them atop a stack.

I looked at the board behind him, the list of crafted beverages going on and on. “Maybe something sweet?”

“Do you like cherries? Passion fruit, pineapple maybe?”

“Cherries are wonderful,” I sat up a little straighter. “I honestly couldn’t care less about what alcohol is in it. You had me at cherries.”

The male smiled, “I shall put in an extra just for you, darling.”

“Thank you,” I smiled and watched him get to work.

The tavern was far more crowded than I expected for a weekday. There were more people than tables and chairs to accommodate them. Some even sitting on the tables. But the hum of voices and clinking glasses was the type of ambient sound that could put me right to sleep if I laid my head down.

I felt incredibly comfortable and safe here. Not that I didn’t other places in the city, but something about being here was… calming. People were enjoying themselves, and it was like I was the only person in here with a scowl on their face.

The crack of billiards had my head turning the other way as I saw a group huddled around a green velvet table with colored balls scattered around. I recognized one immediately as our High Lady. And right beside her was the High Lord.

“This is called a cherry sour. It is made of distilled vodka and lemon. I added some cherry syrup to give it a little extra sweetness for you,” he said, placing the drink in front of me.

“It looks lovely.” I smelled it and it was strong. When I took a sip, it was like my brain blew up. The most strange combinations of flavors, yet somehow it all worked. The brutal burn of the alcohol mixed with the bitter lemon and sweet cherry made my stomach burn. “I see the High Lord is in tonight.”

“Yes,” he nodded, “he is here with the High Lady and a few of their courtiers. The commanding general as well as the Morrigan. And the shadowsinger is here… somewhere. He was with another male when he walked in.”

“I have visited other Courts before. I have never seen any of their High Lords step foot outside of their palaces to so much as wave at their people let alone live amongst them like Rhysand does.”

The craftsman nodded in agreement. “He is not the traditional Lord our continent has come to know, and that is what makes him a vital part of our city. He’s our founder. He built our sanctuary not for us but for himself, too. It is only fair that he dines and plays games where he chooses.”

“Have you ever met them?” I asked curiously.

“Of course, they are here a few times a month. Morrigan and Cursebreaker’s sister are in here more.”

I glanced again, finding a few more heads now joining them. The general, Cassian, was in conversation with a shorter male, his brown hair glistening in the overhead light. He had a tattoo on the side of his neck and it disappeared underneath the collar of his black shirt.

At first I thought it to be the shadowsinger but it wasn’t him. His hair was too light. The more I looked, the more I realized that he looked a little out of place. He had darker skin than either of our Illyrians, and he didn’t have wings. For just a second he turned his head and I caught a glimpse of a scar on his face. Above his left brow and below his eye.

He was very pleasant to look at.

“I will be back, I need to break up some ice in the back,” the bartender spoke generally to the crowd. In a second he was out of sight and out of mind. I could not stop looking at this male.

The curls in his hair looked soft and fluffy and I really wanted to run my fingers through them. Though he was shorter than the general, he was at least a head taller than me, if not a half more than that. Whoever he was…

That couldn’t be the shadowsinger, could it? From all that I’ve heard of the illusive male this did not match any of the descriptions. He was just as tall– if not taller– as Azriel, but the hair… It was too light. And now wings. No shadows. Our High Lord can summon his wings, maybe the others can as well? Plus, I’ve heard that the scars the shadowsinger has on his hands are rather brutal. This male didn’t have any scars on his hands that I could see.

The air around me cooled and I shivered, wishing I had brought my jacket with me. It was like a door just opened and a draft seeped in around me. Up my legs and around my ankles.

To not appear creepy I looked elsewhere, not finding any of the other males in the room as interesting as the one with the brown fluffy hair. There was a couple sitting in a booth across the room, very clearly struggling to keep their affection tame. Another was dancing together and I became painfully aware of just how awful my dating life had been.

I threw back the rest of my drink, just as the bartender returned and ordered a few shots of something stronger. Much stronger by the smell of it. The warmth of it spread through my arms and fingers and the room seemed to get a little rowdier.

“Before I pour another, milady, I would just like to ask if you have a safe way to get home,” he asked kindly.

I smiled at the tenderness in his voice. “Yes, I live right down the way in the set of townhouses by the Sidra. Two minute walk.”

“Excellent.” Another shot was placed in front of me.

I kept sneaking glances at our High Lord and Lady. They looked so magnificent. Like a true emperor and empress. And they looked so happy to be together. Not with just themselves but with the general and whoever this other male was. Perhaps someone from Illyria?

Again, the whole no wings thing was throwing me off.

Wait, where did he-

“Excuse me,” a deep, rough voice said from beside me. My eyes met the most beautiful set of eyes I’ve ever seen. A dark, almost black color with flecks of amber and gold. It was the male I had been gawking at for the past half hour. He had an accent like I’ve never heard before. “I am Xaden.”

I stared at his extended hand for a moment before shaking it. “Yn.”

“Yn,” he practically purred. “A very beautiful name.”

It was hard not to blush. “I don’t mean to sound rude but are you-”

“Hey, there you are. We were just about to start another game did you…” The Spy Master of the Night Court stopped right beside him. His hazel eyes locked with mine and my stare darted between the two. The two very attractive, tall, muscular males in front of me. “Hello there.”

“This is Yn,” Xaden introduced me. “I was just about to ask if I could buy her a drink but I think you had a question for me?”

All thoughts leave my brain. Just above the shadowsingers shoulders lay his wings, and curling around them were those infamous shadows. The most lethal male on the continent stood two feet from me. And he was looking at me like… I didn’t let myself finish that thought.

I cleared my throat, “I was going to ask where you’re visiting from. You have a very… foreign accent.”

Xaden smiled a little and I thought I’d collapse on the ground. “I come from Navarre. A place far from here.”

“I’ve never heard of Navarre,” I said truthfully. But if males like him came from there then maybe I need to visit.

“It’s not entirely accessible,” he folded his arms across his chest. His very muscular and sculpted chest. “I am just visiting a friend.”

I looked at Azriel, who, much to my surprise, hadn’t taken his eyes off me. I shifted in my seat. “You two are friends?”

“Only recently,” Azriel spoke and I felt his voice crawl down my spine. “Xaden here is the closest thing to me that his puny world has to offer.”

“Puny?” Xaden’s eyes went wild. “Take away your wings and siphons and see how well you do as Basgiath. I doubt you’d last five minutes on Sgaeyl in a basic flight maneuver.”

“Basgiath? S-Sgaeyl?” The names were so weird in my mouth.

“Basgiath is the name of our War College. And Sgaeyl is my dragon.”

His what?

“Riroson here thinks that I couldn’t mount and ride a dragon. I’d like to see you take on the Bogge or a Naga with those tiny daggers of yours,” Azriel broke his gaze away from mine to take a sip of whatever was in his glass. “Pathetic.”

“You have a dragon?” I most certainly didn’t hear him correctly. “But they’re-”

“Not where I’m from, they’re not. See, we don’t have magic like you do here in Prythian. Back home, we have to study, bond with a dragon, and then we get the ability to channel their power. Mine just so happens to be shadow-wielding. Apparently this one could feel it across our world and tracked me down. He’s been teaching me for a few years now.”

“And somehow you still can’t manage to winnow,” Azriel rolled his eyes playfully.

“Some of us haven’t had centuries of practice, asshole,” Xaden retorted. If I had known anything about Azriel, I fully expected him to flatten out this Xaden guy.

“You’re not Fae?”

“No offense, but who would want to live forever?” He shrugged. A valid response. It was only then that I saw the roundness of his mortal ears.

Azriel grumbled a curse. “I apologize for him. He is cranky after his long flight here. I’m Azriel, I’m not sure I introduced myself.”

“I know,” I forced myself to look anywhere but his gorgeous face. Easily the most attractive Fae I’ve ever seen.

“Are you here with anyone? I saw you walk in about an hour ago and haven’t seen you talk with anyone,” he asked. He saw me walk in? “If my night had gone any better than yes, I would be here with someone. But, instead, he had other plans and never showed up for our reservation.”

Both of the males stood completely silent. I watched Azriel’s eyes narrow, his jaw clench. “Who was it?”

“It doesn’t matter.” I could feel that bubble of emotion rise up in my throat, pricking my nose and eyes. “He’s just some nobody I was seeing. His loss.”

“Biggest fucking mistake he’ll ever make,” Xaden scooted in closer, leaning his forearms on the counter. “What were you drinking? Next one's on me.”

“Oh, that’s kind of you but I would like to wake up in the morning without any regrets. A water will do,” I smiled sweetly at him and he returned it without a second thought.

I felt Azriel move closer to me and I could just barely see him in my peripheral vision. I tried not to look. It was so hard. All I wanted to do was look at him. Then he was closer. A lot closer. His arm across the back of the stool I was sitting in.

Oh gods his scent.

“For you,” Xaden slipped a cool glass of water in my hands. “To you, Yn.”

I blushed as I knocked my glass with theirs.

“Not to impose, but I would like to know more about this asshole who stood you up tonight. Because clearly he’s not right in the head for leaving you. Especially when you look so good.”

I couldn’t help the flush that spread down my neck and up my ears. “I don’t know, we met over the weekend and he asked if we could go on a date. I said yes. And I think what makes it even worse is that I was looking forward to it. I was excited to get all dressed up and go out for the first time in months. Now I just feel like a fucking idiot for getting my hopes up and wanting to-”

“Hey.” Xaden’s finger pulled my chin to look up at him. “You are not the problem. That mother fucker has another thing coming if he thinks he could’ve ever given you what you need.”

I’d like to focus on the latter part of that statement, but all I could think of was his face– inches from mine– and his other hand at my knee. My heart thrashed and I was so still I wasn’t sure if I was breathing or not.

“I think you’re scaring her, Riorson,” Azriel said from behind me. Then I became aware of just how close he was to me. He practically spoke right against my neck. A hand brushed at my right shoulder and I shuddered.

“If you’re willing, we’re offering.” Xaden has this gleam in his eye and a smirk on his lips.

I had to sit up a little so I could start seeing clearly. “I-I’m sorry ‘we’re’?”

“You don’t have to say yes,” Xaden grinned. “But, if you’d like to erase this guy from your thoughts, all you have to do is show me where it hurts. I promise I can make it all better.”

Is he asking what I think he is? I looked at Azriel who had the same look Xaden did. Full of mischief.

“You… You can’t be serious.” They were playing games with me. They have to be. There’s no way that our Court Spy Master and whoever this guy was from Navarre were willing to share.

“Az?” Is all Xaden said.

Fingers brushed my hair over my shoulder and tucked it out of the way. I gasped when Azriel kissed down my neck. I think I’m shaking, though it could just be my pulse beating so wildly through my veins that it feels like I’m shaking. But I definitely can't feel my fingers anymore.

Xaden stepped in a little closer and blocked most of my view of the rest of the bar. “May I?” He held out a hand. I swallowed and nodded as best as I could with Azriel gently nipping at my throat. Xaden quickly placed his mouth on mine.

I got lost in him. In both of them. All the bells and whistles in my body were going off at once. I’ve never done anything like this before. I had two of the most attractive looking individuals in the world right here. Both kissing me.

In a few seconds Xaden pulled from my mouth and Azriel went with him. I was suddenly so cold and needed them back exactly where they were. My thighs clenched together.

“What do you say, want to take out all your anger, your frustration and disappointment, on us?” Xaden asked softly, right into my ear. The way he pulled it between his lips made it very difficult to say no. Not that I wanted to in the first place. I’d be a fool to say no.

I nodded eagerly.

Azriel clicked his tongue and made me look at him. “Need you to say it, Yn.”

“Yes,” I said without a second thought. “Yes.”

Both of them chuckled. “Let’s get out of here.”

As we made our way down the street, both of the males on either side of me, I was burning with desire; every so often– about every three or four steps– one of them would have to pause, spin me around, and kiss me until I saw stars. They ‘just couldn’t help it’.

Not that I minded.

“Apologies if the place is a mess,” Azriel said, unlocking a door. It looked vaguely familiar, and when I looked up and across the street, I realized why.

“Hey, that’s my place right there,” I smiled, looking at the small rose bushes lining my little walkway.

“Would you rather go there instead? No pressure if you do,” Xaden’s hands went down my sides and hips as he spoke.

I nearly collapsed onto the floor. “No, no this is fine I don’t think I can wait.” “Impatient, are we?” Xaden murmured into my hair.

“Well,” I blew out a breath as he nipped at my ear. “I’m not exactly dreading being taken to be by two males.”

“Hopefully we won’t ruin you for any other lovers.”

Was it bad that I hoped they would?

The door gave away and it was flooded with Azriel’s scent. A mixture of Xaden’s too, but it was hard to differentiate them. His was far more subtle than the shadowsingers. They guided me inside, lights coming on along the halls and overhead.

“Have you ever…” Xaden trailed off and I flushed a deep red.

“No, I’ve never done this before.” My laugh was a pathetic attempt to hide my nerves.

“Don’t worry, we’ll take good care of you,” Xaden grinned and gave my mouth what it wanted most. His tongue was hot against mine and I pressed as close to him as I could get. For a moment I couldn’t see or hear anything, and then we were in a bedroom that seemed far too massive for this little townhouse.

I looked around; a massive bed was standing right before me, dark curtains over a door that led to a balcony.

“Did we just-”

“Winnowing,” Azriel explained, pulling me out of Xadens arms and into his own. “This is far easier when we have room. Like Xaden said, we’re gonna take care of you. Any time you feel uncomfortable just tell us to stop and we will. We do this at your pace, you control it.”

Weirdly enough, my heart ached at the tenderness in his voice. But my body did not want to be in control. It wanted everything but. “And what if I said that I didn’t want to make any decisions. That I just wanted to feel and nothing else.”

I saw Azriel look up first, then felt Xaden press against my backside. I was squished between them and I thanked the Mother that I never went on that date tonight. But they looked at each other.

Azriel grinned. “You’re sure?”

“Absolutely. I need it.”

“Aww, you’re that desperate already?” Xaden pulled me into his body, one hand gripping my face to make me look at him, the other wrapped around my stomach. “We haven’t even touched you yet, pretty thing. Haven’t even tasted you.”

“What are you waiting for?” I have no idea where this boldness is coming from.

Xaden stepped away from me and laid at the top of the bed. “Come here, then.”

No turning back now.

I crawled to him on my hands and knees. The dress I was wearing did nothing to hide my ass any longer. Xadens hand reached out, and when I was close enough, he grabbed me by my throat and pulled me into his lap. Pulled my mouth on his. I let out a very pathetic noise.

His other hand made me sit right on his cock and I could feel everything that was waiting for me. I moved my hips in a circle and he let out a breath, his dark, almost gold flecked eyes looking at me with hunger.

The bed dipped and Azriel pulled my hair back so I looked up at him. “You don’t have to be ashamed if you want to scream our names while we fuck away the pain, Yn.”

I nodded, wanting to twist so I could kiss him but Xaden firmly planted my hips to his. “I didn’t tell you to stop moving, pretty thing.”

I obeyed him. It was such an odd angle; to have my head thrown all the way back but my hips moving. It made it hard to breathe.

“I think she’s getting impatient, Riorson,” Azriel said as if I wasn't even there.

“Yeah I can feel how wet she is.” Xaden curiously slipped a hand between my legs, a few fingers trailing the crease of my thigh. “You really are impatient, aren’t you?”

“Please…”

“Please what?” Azriel pulled my hair harder. “Come on, use your words, Yn. Don’t be shy.”

I whimpered. “Please touch me, Xaden.”

“How can I resist when you ask so nicely.”

Azriel released his grip and Xaden lifted up my hips, pulling down my thong. His fingers were cold against my pussy. I shivered. His fingers were so long. It took everything in me to not fuck myself on them. The shadowsinger remained behind me and slipped the thin straps of my dress off my shoulders.

“Arms up.” Azriel commanded. The dress was lifted off my body and I felt very exposed. But soon enough he was against me, his hard chest against my back. “Kiss him.”

I burned red at the tone of his voice. But I kissed Xaden with enough force to make him bite my lip, catching my tongue between his teeth next. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my chest to his. I jolted as he brushed my clit and he let out a dark chuckle, doing it again and again.

“So easy,” Xaden muttered, pushing me on my back effortlessly. I watched as he stuck his two fingers in his mouth. “Fuck do you taste good, pretty thing.”

His massive hands spread my thighs apart after he threw my underwear somewhere in the room. Those brown curls felt just as soft as I imagined. I didn’t care if I was being desperate, I needed his mouth between my legs. The first pass of his tongue made me go limp. I let my head fall back, my knees parting even further.

My body welcomed him as he explored, tongue flicking, hands bruising my skin. Fingers brushed my chest, so faintly I thought I might’ve imagined it. Azriel had gone somewhere, but I was too focused on Xaden to care at this moment. When I looked down, those were not fingers playing with me, but rather tendrils of shadow circling around.

“What the-”

“Shhh, it’s okay, you’re okay Yn,” Azriel said from my right, standing further in the room. He was undressing, the fighting leathers he had been wearing folded neatly on a desk. His wings were... dear gods his wings were massive. “It’s just me. Nothing to be afraid of.”

Pleasure and fear coursed through me at the same time. My brain and body were on fire with emotions as I watched them drift and encase my body. They were cool to the touch, a stark contrast to the boiling temperature of my skin. As I watched, I settled. It was quite fascinating.

A sharp smack to the inside of my thigh had me looking at Xaden. “Focus on me.”

I nodded and I became aware of just how close I was to my release. I panted and writhed, itching for something to grab onto. Something to touch and yank-

My hands were above my head two seconds later and I was dragged to the edge of the bed.

“Hey,” Xaden shouted and another wave of fear crashed through me. “I was in the middle of something.”

“Well, it’s my turn, Riorson,” Azriel gritted his teeth, taking himself in his hand. “You can still have her legs for now. But I need to feel her mouth.”

Were they fighting for me? For my body? I smiled. So wide it hurt. I obediently opened my mouth and stuck out my tongue, enticing him further. In tandem, I spread my legs as wide as they could go for Xaden.

“You’re so well trained, pet.” Azriel wasted no time forcing his cock down my throat. I couldn’t breathe, but that’s how I wanted it. He thrusted in slowly, stopping when he was all the way, then pulled back out. “You take my cock so well, Yn. I’m so proud of you.”

“If you think her mouth feels good, wait till you get inside her pussy. She’s so warm and tight.”

I moaned around Azriel, knees fluttering off the bed as Xaden sucked my clit. The shadows continued to writhe around my nipples and I felt so exposed. I couldn’t keep still. My legs trembled and I felt that coil in my stomach clenching and clenching. I wanted Xaden’s cock between my legs more than his tongue, but I couldn’t tell him that with Azriel down my throat.

“Do you think she can take both of us?” Azriel asked, brushing a hand across my cheek, then it gently wrapped around my neck. I choked hard enough for tears to streak down my face.

“Hmm,” Xaden hummed around me and I thrashed. “Well, that was adorable. As for fitting both of us? It’s possible. Probably gonna hurt. Don’t worry, he’ll work you open on his cock so good you won’t have a choice but to take both of us.”

“We don’t want to hurt her, Riorson,” Azriel cupped my cheeks. “Unless you want us to, pet?”

I nodded immediately. He pulled out and I heaved for fresh air, eyes glossy as I looked up at him. “Don’t be gentle.”

The way Azriels’ eyes darkened should have made me afraid. Instead it filled me with a primal desire. The force of his hips was brutal. The slight salty taste of his skin was intoxicating. I gagged around him with every press of his tip at the back of my throat, tears burning down my face.

Without any resemblance of a warning, my release barreled through me and I shook, legs kicking out as Xaden continued to tongue fuck me until I saw stars. He kept going. He didn’t stop.

I tried to get him to ease, to let up but my hands were bound at my sides. That same cool feeling sliding around my wrists as it did my chest. It was so much. Already too much.

“Alright, she’s had enough,” Xaden finally pulled away from my throbbing cunt, caressing my thigh and the bruises there. His chin glistened with my cum, and he didn’t let any of it go to waste as his tongue dragged over his lips.

“I’ll tell you when she’s had enough. Get back up on the bed. Strip.” With a more than heavy shove, Azriel sheathed himself inside me one last time, held just long enough to make me panic for a breath. “Good girl, Yn.”

I hiccuped a small sob, already teetering on my breaking point. Azriel sat me up and pushed me down on my hands and knees. In front of me was Xaden. His very hard cock straining up. The shadowsinger’s hand fisted in my hair and I was forced to take his cock down.

“Stay right there, pet. Don’t move. You came without permission. Since you decided to be so greedy, you’re gonna get Xaden off while I punish you.” A merciless hand smacked my ass hard enough to make an outline of his hand. “Got it?”

I nodded around Xaden’s cock and yelped when another smack came down. Xaden groaned, his sculpted abdominal and chest flexing. One arm was behind his head, the other on my head. He was far more gentle than Azriel was, but I could see his control slipping as he thrusted up in time with Azriel’s hand on my ass.

“Fuck she feels good, Az,” Xaden praised, cupping my cheek. “And you look so pretty full of my cock. Gods I can’t wait to be in that pussy.”

I squeaked out an embarrassing noise when Azriel dragged his cock through my cunt, coating himself in my release. Just the tip of him had me stretching and I had to squeeze my eyes shut to block out the sting. With a snap of his hips, he slid in deeper and deeper and deeper-

“That’s it, pet. Take all of my cock. Good girl, Yn. Good girl.” His cooing made it impossible not to cry out around Xaden. As Azriel pulled back, slowly, he grabbed my hips and took me with him. I scrambled to try and keep Xaden’s cock in my mouth, but I was too far away now.

“Look at how desperate she is for you, Riorson. She wants your cock soooo badly she’s fighting me for it.” Azriel ran his nails down my spine. “How about we play a little game, pet. When I pull out of you, you have to keep your mouth on him or else you get a smack. How does that sound?”

I couldn’t tear my eyes away from Xaden. He had a flush to his cheeks. The same primal hunger I had in my eyes. There wasn’t anything I wanted more than to have him come down my throat. A sharp crack rang through the room and I screamed.

“I want an answer. Now.” Azriel demanded, yanking me up and forcing me down on his thick cock.

“Yes yes yes,” I babbled. “Please let me make Xaden feel good.”

“You’re so pretty when you beg like that,” Xaden mumbled, dragging me back down to him by my wrist. I wrapped my lips around him and worked up and down. He was just as big as Azriel. But the shadowsinger was bigger.

Azriel’s hands on my hips hurt almost as much as the hand that smacked me. I’m sure it was bright red and swollen. Every time he thrusts into me, he forces my body back into him. A few times I was pulled off of Xaden and I got punished. New tears running down my face after every one.

“F-Fuck Az stop doing that,” Xaden growled out. “I barely have her for two seconds before you’re ripping her away again.” His two hands gripped the sides of my head, forcing me all the way to his pelvic bone. “Now stop holding back and fuck her like you mean it.”

“Think she can handle that?”

“Of course she can, look at her. Split open wide on our cocks, taking them like she’s been doing it for years. She’ll be fine, won’t you, pretty thing?” I nodded, blinking up at him. “See, she wants it. Such a good fuck toy. Such a good pet.”

“If you can’t, say so now, Yn,” Azriel gripped at my hips to pull Xaden's dick out of my throat. “Well?”

“D-Don’t… don’t hold back.” Gods my voice was raw. “Please don’t hold back. I need it.”

“See? Now go, I’ve been on the edge for the past ten minutes,” Xaden said rather impatiently.

I could not have prepared myself for the force of Azriel’s thrusts. Or the grip Xaden had on my head. I thought my neck was going to rip from my shoulders with how hard I was being pulled in opposite directions. I only got a breath every two or three drives of Azriel’s cock.

Both of them were a whimpering mess. Xaden especially. I prayed to the Mother that these walls were thick enough so no one would hear us.

Minutes ticked by and I became a limp mess. A mere boneless thing for Azriel and Xaden to play with. My arms were trembling beyond use and my legs and toes were numb with euphoria. I couldn’t keep myself up any more.

“Fuck, Yn,” Xaden panted, hips bumping into my nose every time he snapped his hips. “Gonna come.” I just let all my weight fall onto him, letting him go deeper and deeper down my throat. “You’re such a good girl, Yn. Such a good fucking girl.”

Azriel shoved his cock as far as it would go, forcing me to take all of Xaden’s cum down my throat in one go. I didn’t even get to taste it. Xaden fucked into my mouth, hands firm on my head as he continued to spill. I dared a glance up and I saw shadows, slightly different than Azriel’s, caressing his shoulders.

How the hell did I get so lucky?

I was pulled off of Xaden and I was completely limp. “What do you say to Xaden, pet?”

“Thank you,” I stuttered out as Az continued to fuck me.

“Good girl. Now clean him up so he can take my place.” On my own accord, I picked my heavy head up and lapped at his cock, gently cleaning him with tiny flicks of my tongue. Up and down and up and down. He tasted so good. Salty and tangy. “Still got more, Riorson? I forget you humans can’t reset as quickly as we can.”

“I have stamina that’ll put you to shame, Illyrian.” Xaden had a devilish grin on his lips. “My turn.”

Xaden’s hands wrapped under my arms, guiding me off of Azriel. I tried to get my legs to move, but it was a useless effort. I could barely think let alone tell my body what to do.

“Easy, Riorson. I know you’re eager. And trust me, you should be. Fuck is she tight.”

Xaden let out a teasing noise, pumping a few times to get himself hard again. “Aww I bet she is. Gonna take my cock next, pretty thing? Yeah you are, and you’re gonna take Azriel's, too. Come on, sink down and- yes just like that, yes Yn. Good girl.”

Riding him made this so much easier. He was far stronger than I was and helped me rock back and forth. It was wonderful stimulation for my clit, too. For a few minutes he bounced me up and down, filthy praises spilling out of him like it was his job.

“I told you,” Azriel’s voice was right up against the back of my neck. “Worth the wait.”

“What if I told you I didn’t want to share her anymore?” Xaden sucked on my nipple and rubbed my clit at the same time.

“Too late for that, Riorson. She’s all ours, aren’t you?” I felt the press of Azriel’s cock against my hole and jumped. “Relax. It’ll hurt if you don’t.”

I nodded, getting lost between the two sets of hands–the two sets of lips and tongues and teeth. I was one with the stars, completely suspended in a place I didn’t know but I sure as hell didn’t want to leave any time soon. I tried to remain still as Az slowly–very slowly– pushed in bit by bit. I was reduced to nothing but mumbling noises and begging whines.

“Should’ve asked Cass if he wanted to join us so she could have something to do with that mouth of hers,” Xaden blew out a breath. “Need something to suck on, pretty thing?”

I just nodded, too overstimulated to speak. I just needed. I don’t know what I needed but I needed it.

“Gods you really are such a good pet,” Az pulled my head back. With a firm grip on my jaw, it fell open and he spat in my mouth. The shock of it damn near pushed me over the edge. My eyes crossed and my vision blurred as he stuck his fingers in my mouth for me to suck.

It took several minutes but then I was balancing between both their cocks, vibrating with energy and a need so deep I knew the second they would move I’d come. And I’d keep spasming around them as they did as they pleased.

Hands expanded every inch of my body. “Ready?”

“Mhmm,” was the best response I could get out. Xaden pulled me towards him, then slowly pushed me back onto Azriel. Then Az slowly pushed me onto Xaden. I was weightless in their hands, practically being held up by them alone.

“You are doing such a good job, my pet,” Azriel pulled out his fingers, gripping my throat. “So tight and wet. That’s it, just relax. Let us take you, Yn.”

“She’s being so good, don’t you think she deserves a reward, Az?” Xaden plucked both of my breasts.

“Of course she does.”

My ears were ringing. Sweat soaked my hairline. I could feel Xadne and Azriel’s pulse against my own, and I swore I could’ve felt them all sync up for a beat or two or five. Endless shadows swirled across my skin, hands fighting for leverage on my hips. I knew I’d be marked and bruised in the morning.

“I got her here, you take care of her down there,” Azriel instructed. Both of his hands cupped my chest, pinching brutally. Xaden snaked his hand between our fronts and just barely grazed my clit before I was coming so hard my vision blacked out.

I screamed, throat burning with pain as I writhed and begged for nothing and everything. I cried out over and over as they continued to push me. Lips and tongue slid over my throat, Xaden’s forcing its way into my mouth to swallow my screams.

Azriel bit down on my shoulder and snapped his hips a few times, trying and failing to suppress his moans. It came from deep in his chest and it rumbled through me. “Gonna take my cum, pet?”

I couldn’t respond. No matter how hard I tried I couldn’t get words to form.

“Give it to her, Az. She needs it,” Xaden said for me. “Don’t worry, pretty thing, Az is gonna give it to you. Just be patient.”

His hips worked into me, fucking me onto Xaden. With one hand wrapped around my throat, the other on my side, Azriel came inside me, the thick, bitter scent sending my mind spiraling. His thrusts didn’t stop, even as Xaden warned him he was close.

Azriel stilled then, panting hot against the back of my neck. “You’re clenching so hard, pet. Such a good job at keeping it all inside you. Now do the same for Xaden. Let him fill you up, Yn.”

Xaden was far less controlled, those shadows over his shoulders whipping wildly as he fucked up into me hard enough to touch places he hadn’t yet. With a handful of movements, Xaden brought our hips flush together and he strained his neck, baring his teeth into the air.

His noises would’ve been enough to set me off again had I not been so previously spent.

It could’ve been hours that I laid between them, their cocks still buried inside me as they stroked my skin, stroked my hair and kissed me lazily.

______

“Yn.” A gentle press of lips to mine. My eyes fluttered open and Xaden’s face became clearer. “There she is.”

“She awake?”

“Mhmm,” Xaden kissed my forehead. “Feeling better?”

I wiggled my toes to see if the feeling had come back. I just nodded, snuggling in deeper to his chest. “Yeah.”

“Good good,” he wrapped his arms tighter around me. “You were so good for us, Yn.”

“The best,” Azriel seconded, and a warm body pressed up behind me. “You were pretty out of it for about an hour. We cleaned you up as best we could with you mumbling about how much you loved to please us.”

I flushed in embarrassment, putting my hands over my face. “Cauldron damn me.”

“It was quite adorable,” Xaden murmured, prying my hands from my face. “And you were incredible.”

“So fucking incredibly,” Azriel agreed, tucking in close behind me. I carefully flipped over, looking at the shadowsinger. “You did such a good job.”

“It was easy when I had you two doing all the work for me,” I smiled, leaning up to kiss him. “Still cannot believe I just did that.”

“Do you regret it?”

“Absolutely not.” I squashed down that possibility the second their hands had been on me. “It was perfect.”

“Don’t feel pressured to answer, but Xaden visits every so often to Prythian. When he comes back, how do you feel about doing this again?” Azriel asked cautiously. “If you would like some time to think about it then-”

“Yes.” Why would I ever say no to being worshiped? “Absolutely yes.”

Both of them chuckled, Xaden molding his body to fit mine, arm laying across my stomach. “Told you we might ruin you for anyone else.”

#azriel #acotar fanfiction #acotar #acotar fanfic #azriel shadowsinger #azriel x reader #azriel x reader x xaden riorson #xaden x reader #xaden riorson #fourth wing fanfic #fourth wing #fourth wing smut #acotar smut #fourth wing fanfiction

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grandmother-goblin · 3 months

Text

Just Watch the Fireworks

Ao3 - Masterlist

Summary: It was supposed to be a sweet, innocent date. That was, until Astarion decided he wanted to have some fun with you while you were very much still in public.

Relationships: Astarion x Female!Reader

Rating: Explicit (18+) for smut.

Word Count: 2.3k

Tags: Smut, exhibitionism, vaginal fingering, dirty talk, cuddling, kissing, post Astarion's personal quest, spawn!Astarion.

Firework shows over Grey Harbor happened only a couple of times a year in Baldur’s Gate. Bright, massive, loud displays that boomed over the whole city and illuminated the night sky in dazzling arrays of colors and lights. Usually they marked some sort of holiday or other celebration. Although you weren’t keen on the celebration for this particular occasion, Gortash’s coronation, you were still eager to see the show.

Plus, it was a nice way to end your impromptu date with Astarion. You two had gone out to get some supplies, but upon seeing the night market and posters for the firework show, you decided to stay a while.

Astarion had found a perfect spot for the two of you on a grassy, green hillside just on the outskirts of the city. It was one of the more popular places to watch the fireworks. People dotted the landscape, all sitting on their own little blankets as they looked out over the ocean, waiting for the show to begin.

It was kind of nice to be out with Astarion like this.

Ever since Cazador had been defeated, Astarion had grown much more comfortable being out in the open at night. He seemed more relaxed overall, like a heavy weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. Of course, there were several other factors on both of your minds: the tadpole, the Absolute, the fact that Astarion’s days walking in sunlight were numbered.

But you two would figure it out.

Together.

For now, you wanted to enjoy the night with him and pretend none of your problems existed. Even if it was only for a couple of hours.

As you sat between his open legs, Astarion wrapped his arms around you along with a knitted blanket, cocooning you in pleasant warmth. You leaned your head back against his shoulder with a comfortable sigh, luxuriating in the silky soft material of his shirt. “I bet you’ve seen these shows a thousand times.”

“I have,” he replied matter-of-factly, his cool breath fanning across your neck. You felt him press a kiss to your shoulder, and you couldn’t help the smile that tugged on your lips. “One year, all the fireworks went off at the same time. It was hilarious and I almost hope it happens again.”

You gave a little snort of laughter. “That would cut this date really short.”

“We can find plenty more to do, my love.” Astarion’s fingers slipped under the hem of your shirt and gave your hip an affectionate squeeze. “Now that Cazador is gone, we can do whatever we want. The night is still young.”

“Oh no,” you replied lightly. “I’m turning in for the night after the show is over. I’m exhausted.”

Though Astarion seemed to have plenty of energy, the events of the day had been starting to weigh on you. All you wanted to do after the fireworks display was cozy up in some warm pajamas and snuggle into your bed at the Elfsong Tavern.

Preferably, you would be cuddled up next to Astarion, but you wouldn’t stop him if he had other plans.

Most nights since you had started sharing a room with him, Astarion had been perfectly capable of keeping himself occupied while you slept. Sometimes he would read a book or work on something with a needle and thread, but you almost always awoke to him meditating peacefully beside you.

Other nights, well, he had to hunt. While you were happy to be his donor when he really needed blood, it simply wasn’t practical to let him feed on you all the time. So long as he was discreet, you didn’t mind that he took his hunting to the streets.

With his thumb, he drew idle circles around your hip as he rested his chin on your shoulder. You closed your eyes and relaxed into his touch, enjoying the feel of the heavy blanket wrapped around you and the firmness of his chest against your back.

His lips brushed against the shell of your ear and with a low and husky voice, he said, “I keep thinking about our night in the graveyard.”

A smile tugged at the corner of your lips. “Which part?”

“The part with you under me,” he muttered against your skin as he slipped one finger beneath the waistband of your pants, “moaning my name as you clawed my back.”

Heat rose to your cheeks. “Shh,” you said, your eyes darting around at the people sitting on neighboring blankets. “Not so loud.”

“They aren’t paying attention to us.” Astarion placed a reassuring kiss to the side of your head, but he didn’t move his hand. Then he cocked his chin to the starry sky above the harbor. “The show is about to start.”

Sure enough, the first of the fireworks burst into the sky. A splattering of reds and yellows against the inky night sky, the distant sounds of explosive crackling reaching your ears mixing with the sound of excited cheers from the people around you. You watched as the bursts of light shimmered away, blending into the night, just before more fireworks flowered above.

You couldn’t help but smile as you leaned back into Astarion’s touch. Squeezing his arms around you, he pulled your body flush against his. At first, you thought he was just cuddling closer. But then you felt it: a hard ridge nudged that up against your lower back.

You swallowed, but felt heat rising to your face even as you tried to ignore Astarion’s painfully obvious erection. He wasn’t doing anything inappropriate — he was just holding you. With his hard cock pressed against your back.

Gods, was it always so hot at night? What did you even need a blanket for?

Just as you thought about shrugging the blanket from your shoulders, his fingers slipped further beneath the waistband of your pants. “I want to touch you,” he said, his lips brushing against your throat as he spoke. “Just a little bit.”

“Right now?” you asked, keeping your voice so low you could barely hear yourself over the fireworks. Uncertainty and anticipation tugged your mind in two different directions and you shifted slightly, unsure of what to do with yourself.

It had only been a couple of nights since your tryst in the cemetery, and you and Astarion hadn’t been intimate since. Not for any particular reason — there just wasn’t enough time in the day for intimacy with everything going on with the Absolute.

Suddenly very aware of a subtle, yearning, ache between your legs that hadn’t been there a few moments ago, you pressed your thighs together hoping to give yourself some relief.

It was unfair, really, how quickly Astarion could turn you on.

You were supposed to be on a sweet, innocent, date! And he—

“Spread your legs a bit for me, darling,” Astarion murmured, his dangerous teeth delicately nipping at sensitive flesh just below your jawbone.

He was absolutely going to be the death of you.

Glancing around, there were people in every direction you looked. No one was sitting too close, but they were close enough that they could easily hear your conversation had you not been trying to be quiet. But all of them faced straight ahead, their eyes entranced on the bursts of light blooming across the sky.

“Astarion,” you whispered, your voice somewhere between a warning and a whine as Astarion’s fingers brushed over the soft fabric of your panties. “There are people around.”

His hand stilled, and you couldn’t help the tiny, involuntary, tilt of your hips. You could see the flash of his teasing, rakish smile from the corner of your eye. “Do you want me to stop?”

Your heart pounded in your chest as you took one more look around.

Astarion had been right earlier.

No one was paying attention to the two of you.

Shaking your head, you swallowed as nerves and excitement fluttered in your stomach. “But—”

“All you have to do is stay still for me,” Astarion said as he slipped his fingers beneath the waistband of your underwear, “and try not to moan my name too loudly.”

Carefully, and as subtly as you could, you let your legs fall open.

A pleased hum rumbled in Astarion’s throat as he pulled your back flush against him. His hard cock was like a brand against your lower back. “Now just watch the fireworks, darling, and no one will know what I’m doing to you under this blanket.”

Kissing your neck, the tips of his fingers slowly, steadily, circled your clit. You let your head fall back against his shoulder with a sigh, your cheeks burning as he touched you.

Gods, he was really going to do this, wasn’t he? He was going to finger you in public and…

You didn’t want him to stop.

You breathed in deep, inhaling the sweet piney and citrusy scent of his cologne. A comforting scent, and one that turned you on like no other because it was uniquely Astarion’s. Slowly, your body relaxed into his touch.

For a moment, it was just the two of you and the sounds of fireworks.

“Good girl,” Astarion purred as his hand delved between your legs. You couldn’t help but bite your lip as he teased your entrance, gathering your slickness on his fingertips. Slowly, he slid one finger inside of you. “It’s just me and you right now.”

He touched you leisurely, unhurried strokes. The subtle curl of his fingers made you want to arch into him. It was all too easy to forget yourself when you were with him. When he was touching you like this.

How you wanted to return the favor. You wanted to wrap your hand around that hard length behind you and give him some pleasure as well.

But you couldn’t.

At least, not without exposing you both.

When he pressed another finger inside you, a shaky exhale passed your lips. Your walls clenched around him, as if trying to draw him in deeper. “Astarion, please,” you whispered, not really sure what you were asking for.

But Astarion knew.

Astarion knew exactly how to touch you.

He knew exactly what your body needed to be brought to the edge. Oh, he knew how to make you scream in ecstasy, but he also knew how to make you sigh with pure pleasure. Like how his dexterous hands picked locks, it was like they knew all of your intricacies and exactly how to make you fall apart.

You pressed your lips against the underside of his jaw, stifling your moans against his cool skin. The heel of his palm rocked over against your clit in a steady, consistent rhythm as he shallowly thrusted into you. Glancing down, you could see that the thick blanket around you masked his movements completely.

Sneaky, clever, man.

Of course he knew exactly how to do something like this without being obvious. Although Astarion was far from subtle, he was excellent at not getting caught doing things he wasn’t supposed to.

The only one you had to worry about was yourself.

Your face heated as his movements grew more powerful. Your fingers gripped his thigh under the blanket as your core tightened around his fingers.

His tongue flicked the shell of your ear delicately. “Do you know what I want to do right now?” he asked, his voice low and husky.

Another gasp escaped your lip as he added a third finger, your body stretching to accommodate him. You felt so full, and you wanted nothing more than for him to go deeper. To fill you completely in a way only he could.

“What… what do you want to do?” you panted, fighting the urge to squirm in his arms.

Whatever you did, you would not let yourself get caught simply because you lacked self control.

The heel of his palm pressed more firmly against your clit, providing delicious friction as he fucked your so gently with his fingers. “I want to bend you over, darling,” he said as he picked up speed. “And I want to taste that pretty pussy of yours.”

Oh, by the gods.

He would never.

It was just dirty talk but — the idea of having an audience was so incredibly hot. Especially since there were so many people around, and you couldn’t indulge in such a fantasy here.

The forbidden nature of it just made you want it more.

“I would make you come on my tongue,” he murmured as the hard ridge between you pressed meaningfully against your back. “Only then, would I give you my cock. And I wouldn’t stop until you were screaming my name.”

You were so close. Your entire body was strung tight as your walls clenched around his fingers, wishing for something bigger. Thicker.

Why did you agree to this? You wanted nothing more than to climb on top of him and let him fill you up the way you wanted.

“Gods. Astarion,” you whispered against the scars on his neck. “I’m—”

Your mouth fell open on a sharp gasp as Astarion’s fingers returned to your clit. Astarion captured your lips with his own, drinking in your soft moans as you came undone.

The lights from the fireworks burst behind your closed eyes. The booming display in the sky crescendoed into a deafening roar as the show reached its finale, drowning out your already muffled sighs.

Wave after wave of pleasure coursed through you as you rode out your orgasm. Your hips undulated lewdly against his hand as his lips moved against yours. He tasted like sweet wine as his tongue flicked against yours teasingly.

It was only when your heart began to settle that you felt the delicate nip of his fangs on your lips. His fingers, still slick with your arousal, intertwined with yours as he gazed down at you.

When you looked into those gorgeous vermillion eyes, his pupils were blown wide with lust.

Lust, and unmistakable love.

Then his eyes flickered toward the direction of the Elfsong Tavern. “You know,” he said, holding your chin in hand as his thumb swiped gently over your lower lip. “I think we should turn in early after all. What do you say?”

You were nodding before he even finished his sentence. “Oh gods, yes.”

---

Author's Note: This is my first foray into writing anything in second person or anything xReader, so I'm sorry for any mistakes and I hope you enjoyed!

#astarion #x reader #astarion x reader #astarion smut #astarion fanfic

629 notes · View notes

sungbeam · 11 months

Text

𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞

gamer/streamer!choi beomgyu x f!reader

1.5k words, fluff/comfort, reader has hair long enough for a claw clip, strawberries, est. relationship au, the background info dump in the beginning was for my own entertainment tbh

Choi Beomgyu loved you.

Sometimes he wondered how you could possibly love someone like him—a loser who streamed League half the day away, lived in his pajamas, and dropped out of college to play video games for hundreds of thousands of people online. He barely went out of the house, unless it was to touch grass, but he had managed to snag your attention nonetheless.

He liked to joke that you were in it for his celebrity status. It was made all the more ironic, since you had no idea who he was when he'd first introduced himself to you in the self-checkout aisle of a grocery store, and you'd stared at him like he was high. Beomgyu, humbled to all hell, had stuttered out an apology and bowed about ninety degrees—then asked for your number like a normal person.

Ah, good times.

He'd then somehow mustered up enough swagger to date you for two years and counting. And now, you were moved in and got to hear him yell at a handful of computer monitors for twelve hours a day. (Love was funny, wasn't it?)

But if forever was the sweetest con, then dear god, he hoped he could pull this one off.

It was during one of his streams that he heard the front door slam from his office. He had just finished a round, and when he had heard the door but not your voice, he pushed back from his desk so he could lean back and give you a holler. "Yn! Yn-ie! Babyyyyy!"

He waited a beat.

A frown curled his mouth downward when he didn't hear your reply. Uh oh.

Tongue in cheek, Beomgyu used his feet to bring him back to his computer screen. His eyes flickered with the pace at which his chat flew past. "Hey chat, I need to check up on my girl. I'll be right back. Go get a snack or something."

With that, he dumped his headset onto the desk and raced out of the office.

He flew out into the main living space of the apartment, his eyes scanning the premises for you. With both of your incomes combined, the two of you managed to live comfortably in a nice apartment complex just north of the main city center. You both shared a bedroom and bathroom, while also getting separate, small office spaces. You used yours a lot less than he did his, but it was nice to have one in case.

Instead of your figure, he found your keys and shoes by the door, and a grocery bag on the island counter.

He backpedaled over to the bedroom next, head poking into the darkened room. His voice came out low, "Babe, you here?"

"Yeah," came your small response.

He tracked it to the bathroom, where you were hunched over your sink in the dark, your hair pulled back in a claw clip. Your face was damp like you had just washed it, but he didn't miss the way you were wiping at your eyes. Something sank in his chest, something heavy that made his body slump in dread.

"Sorry, I didn't wanna bother you," you said, forcing stability into your voice, even if it still shook a little.

You reached for your facial towel to hide your melancholy, but Beomgyu liked to think he paid more attention than you were giving him credit for.

He wrapped his arms around your middle from behind, pressing a kiss to the side of your head. "Hey, you're never a bother; you know that," he replied softly. "What's wrong, hm? How can I help?"

Your body shook with a sob as you cried into the towel. Beomgyu's chest clenched at the sound, at the feeling. God, he was right here, and yet, he felt so helpless, so useless. "It's nothing—I… I just… I'm just tired," you managed to say.

You sniffled, avoiding his eyes in the dark mirror as you set the towel aside and began washing your face again.

Beomgyu pursed his lips and sucked in a breath. "Yn-ie, you know I'm not just gonna let you go to sleep this upset, baby."

When you'd patted your face dry again, you were left with reddened, puffy eyes. You turned around to press your face into his warm chest. His arms looped around you like second nature to hold you to him.

Beomgyu gently smoothed a hand over the back of your head, letting the tension from the claw clip loosen the headache no doubt forming in your cranium. He clipped the accessory to his belt loop, quietly trying to calm your muffled cries. "Come on. Let's get some food into your stomach, okay? It'll make you feel better."

He led you out to the kitchen, helping you onto one of the bar stools while he rummaged through the grocery bag you brought home. His chest panged when he imagined you going through the grocery store while holding back tears. Had you cried there, or perhaps it had all come flooding out here?

There were a few things to add to the fridge, but he found a carton of big, red strawberries at the bottom of the bag. He released a breath he didn't realize he had been holding in—you'd managed to get yourself something. Good. He was glad.

Usually in your shared household, you were the one to wash and cut and peel fruit for him. You fed him all the healthy things, kept him a normal functioning human being. You kept him sane.

So Beomgyu took the carton of strawberries out of the bag and transferred them to a colander to be washed. He then carefully sliced the stems off each berry, sliced them into halves, until the colander was empty and the bowl he had on the counter, filled.

He wiped his hands on the towel hanging below the sink, then brought the bowl of glistening red fruit before you.

"For you," he murmured, one warm palm pressed between your shoulder blades, his lips brushing a kiss to your hairline. "I'll be right back."

Beomgyu hurried back to the office to find his viewers waiting.

He braced his arm on the desk, forgoing sitting down in the chair. He swept a lock of his long hair out of his eyes as he skimmed some of the live comments in the chat. A huff of laughter, then a shake of his head. "You guys are so weird. I'm signing off for the night though—no, I don't owe you an explanation... Okay, it's my baby—yeah, yeah, I see you rampaging in the comments, Chenle."

Beomgyu wrinkled his nose playfully. "I'm not a fuckin' simp, you losers. At least I have a partner. Okay, whatever. Later, guys."

He turned off the stream with a tap of his mouse, and then he was back by your side. You seemed to have calmed down a little, but what lacked your sobbing came a sad, startling quiet. Quiet from you wasn't unusual per se, but this one felt empty.

Beomgyu stood behind your stool, one of his arms curling around your middle as he peered over your shoulder at the bowl. You'd eaten a few slices of the fruit while he was gone, but it wasn't as much as he had hoped you would have eaten.

He released a light exhale, reaching for a strawberry slice and popping it into his mouth. He leaned his head against yours. "Wanna snuggle?" He asked you quietly.

A small smile pulled at the corners of your mouth, and he mentally high-fived himself. "Is that a yes?" He gasped with a childlike excitement. "You wanna snuggle with me?"

You nodded, not trusting your voice just yet, but that was okay. He heard you loud and clear.

You turned on the stool so you could wrap your limbs around his body.

Beomgyu cooed softly. "My sweet baby. I'm so sorry you have to feel this way." He kissed your head again, his arms shifting so he could hoist your body up and carry you over to the sofa with him.

He collapsed onto the sofa with a melodramatic grunt, then flopped backward so you were lying on top of his chest. He wondered, with your ear pressed against him, if you could hear just how much your proximity affected him. Even after all this time. If, maybe, you felt even a fraction of what he felt for you (just a fraction would make his heart soar). There was no way you didn't, right?

He wrapped both arms around you with a sigh. "I know you don't want to talk about it," he murmured, "just know it'll be alright. All of it. Even if it seems like the world is falling apart, even if you feel like a failure—you will get through this. I know you can; I know you will."

Your first words since earlier to him came at almost an inaudible volume. "And if I can't? What then?"

"Then I'll be here to help you," he answered. Yes, that was it. His breath was warm against your cheek, against your ear. "I'll always be here."

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shiny-jr · 2 years

Note

Pleasing and begging please...something with soft yan Vil....maybe specifically something about him protecting his darling from some particularly jealous and vindictive fans?

Warning: Yandere. Gender-neutral reader.

Characters: Vil Schoenheit.

Summary: When news finally got out that you, a common person, was dating the Vil Schoenheit, all hell seemed to break loose.

Note: Man, y'all really like soft yan Vil stuff, huh? Come get y'all food. This came out way longer than I thought it would. Oh, and it’s 1AM when I checked for mistakes, so sorry if there’s some I missed.

Vil hadn't meant for this to happen. All he had wanted was to have a nice serene dinner with you. It was at an exclusive restaurant on the highest floor, a space he rented so he could be entirely alone with you and there would be no one else to disturb you. While you were in awe at the sight of the city lights from clear glass windows from on high, he was distracted too. Not by the sight, oh no. There was something else, or rather someone else, far more beautiful right in front of him. Perhaps that was his mistake, distracted by admiring you with eyes filled with love, so entranced that he failed to notice the waiter by the door quietly snapping a photo of the two.

Everything was normal the next day. The quiet before the storm. Vil was busy with some filming, apparently landing a role in a highly anticipated movie. You were in a cafe, quietly relaxing with a magazine and on the cover was your very partner. As you sipped on your drink of choice, you listened in to the noises around you. People ordering coffees and overpriced macaroons, the ding! of the cash register, the chime of the bell above the entrance. When a lively little intro song came on, your eyes drifted to the source: the television.

The screen displayed a youthful looking woman, one that hosted those types of talk shows where they spoke about the hottest trends, conversed about the most dramatic of events, and discussed the most baseless of celebrity rumors. It's bright colors and loud volume immediately caught your eye. You decided to watch, taking another long sip of your beverage as the pretty hostess appeared in her chair.

"And the hottest story today, Vil Schoenheit was pictured last night, reportedly on a date!"

What.

The hostess laughed, sounding a little fake as she continued with a pearly white smile, "The leaker of the photo says that Vil seemed extremely close with this person he was with. Now who exactly is this mysterious stranger? Their identity was uncovered, revealed to be a person by the name of (Y/n) (L/n)!"

When an image of your face came on screen, you nearly spat out your drink as you choked, "What the fu–"

The sudden noise from you had caught the attention of others around you. Almost immediately their eyes widened, some looking at the image beside the talking host and back at your face. Others bold enough to take out their cameras and start recording or snapping photos.

It appeared that one of Vil's super fans was even there, judging by the pin with his face on their bag and the smell of the perfume he last did an advertisement for. This particular fan got close, too close as she clutched her phone, obviously recording. "Oh my god, it's you! Are you really dating Vil? Seriously?"

By now all eyes and lenses in the cafe were on you as you awkwardly stood and gathered your things. "I, uh... I-I have to go." Without looking back, you sped out the door, nearly certain that some were still curiously following you.

When you looked at the huge screens over the Main Street of downtown, you saw your face and Vil's. As you walked, you swore people were looking, a crowd must've been forming behind you like a horde of zombies. No matter where you went, you could hear the talking hostess on phones in people's hands and small televisions in display windows.

As you heard those strangers behind you call your name, you refused to look back. When you felt their touch on your shoulder or feel them tug on your shirt, you felt your anxiety spike. Ripping yourself out of their grip, you increased your speed to a jog and ran into the closest store you saw.

As you looked around for a way out, someplace to hide, you spotted some changing rooms in the corner. Before those pursuers could find you, you made a beeline for the changing rooms and swiftly closed the curtains behind you. Lifting your feet off the ground to avoid being seen at all, you curled up on the small chair and went completely silent upon hearing more people enter the store. Thankfully, the changing rooms were very well hidden, so you should be safe for now.

Not even a second later, your phone began ringing. At first you were tempted to decline the call, already fearing that somehow those crazy host shows had gotten a hold of your number. But when you saw the smiling photo of a certain blonde man you set as his contact image, you immediately swiped up to answer the FaceTime call.

Vil's frazzled and alarmed face appeared on the screen. Before you could even say a word, he spoke in a slightly panicked tone, "My dear, are you alright?! Where are you at this very moment? The chauffeur has picked me up and we're on our way right now." So he just found out too.

When you informed him of your location and what had happened upon finding out, he appeared horrified that you had to hide in a changing room. Distantly you could hear him frustratingly tell the chauffeur, "I don't want to be there soon, I need to be there now!"

Vil could see you were obviously scared, and who wouldn't be after literally being chased by his fans? So he remained on the line, whispering sweet words of comfort as he attempted to remain calm for you. After a moment, he spoke again, "I'm going through a tunnel soon. I'm going to hang up, but once we're through, I'll call right back, do you understand? Whatever you do, do not check your social media accounts."

He hung up. You checked your social media accounts. You could only hope it was a bad dream, but your name being number one trending and your face on the day's top article, was enough to inform you that it was not some dream. Just a quick scroll and you could see users critiquing your appearance, many haters but also supporters in the midst. Your direct messages had +99 over them, meaning some of these strangers had even tried to directly contact you. You didn't have to be a genius to know that many of them were going to be harsh and unnecessary insults.

By the time the limousine arrived, many people had already left, but there were still the stragglers left behind. Stragglers which immediately took notice of the limousine pulling up and the familiar star emerging. Vil ignored them all, no matter if they approached or not, and went straight to the changing rooms where he fetched you. Instantly he embraced you, glad to see you safe. But the embrace did not last long. After all, you were still in the public eye, being followed and all. As of now, his priority was escorting you home and then he would deal with this.

Placing an arm around you, he guided you towards the car. He kept his head held high, appearing indifferent past his round sunglasses. But you knew better. You were hidden by the jacket he had wrapped around you, which you used to hide your face. Judging by the bright flashes, paparazzi had arrived on the scene, likely given a tip by one of your pursuers from earlier. These paparazzi would no doubt follow you and Vil all the way home.

Your name on their tongues with their unfamiliar voices, the bright flashing lights, the bodies all around you trying to get closer, it all felt like too much. That was why you were grateful that Vil rushed to get you back to the limousine safe and sound, and immediately had the chauffeur drive off once you both were secure inside.

Once the car took off, Vil embraced you again, tighter and for much longer. For now, you felt safe. Vil clutched you firmly as he murmured, “I apologize... I truly am so sorry for what you’ve gone through because of me.” Then, his voice became angry as he pulled away, but still held you by the shoulders as he assured, “This is unacceptable! They ruined everything...! They frightened you, they meddled into our private affairs, all of it is unforgivable! Judging by the view of the leaked image, it had to have been a staff member at the restaurant we dined at last night. I’ll see to it that whoever did it is ruined, and the company shall recompense us in some way. For now... please, depend on me. I apologize again, but I’ll do my very best to make things right.”

The night he gets you your very favorite drink and food, in order to comfort you. Anything you ask for at that time, is basically yours. He’s just so frightened, not because of the breach in privacy but he’s terrified that this’ll make you want to leave. It’s why he dedicates almost all his time and effort into silencing nasty rumors and gossips, or at least trying to. It’s impossible to really silence it.

For the next few days, Vil sticks by your side like glue. If you don’t want to go anywhere, he stays beside you. If you allow it, he’ll take you to work with him. If and when you do go to work, he’ll demand a small staff and is very meticulous about how cameras are used. He’s sort of developed a small list of rules. No photographs of you without your permission, no speaking about the incident or news of the incident unless you bring it up, and be very very careful about what you say about his beloved.

Now everyone and their mom seems to know about you. Its a huge deal, and everyone is talking about it. Some discussed your looks, others like fans were enraged and jealous that you were dating Vil, and there were those that supported you and were sympathetic. Everyone had an opinion. Although you didn’t read them, you were avoiding social media for your own sanity.

When you were leaving an airport with Vil from a recent flight, that was thankfully private, the welcome was not so private. The news was still relatively fresh, with many still attempting to squeeze out any piece of information. You were welcomed by crowds of Vil fans and curious onlookers, with paparazzi and camera men in the mix. The clicks of cameras and the people’s shouts were deafening.

Vil had some guards that kept everyone else within an arm’s length away, but still, there were so many people... You clutched Vil’s arm tighter as he patted your knuckles with his other hand, noticing your distress and quickening his pace to get you to someplace you can relax.

Abruptly, you heard running footsteps. When you turned around, you were stunned to see a girl had somehow wormed her way past some of the guards and nearly lunged at you or Vil. You weren’t sure who she was aiming for, if she wanted to attack you or cling to Vil. Just before she could grab either you or him, she was yanked back by guards.

The blonde beside you appeared appalled and disgusted, but he never stopped moving. No, he only kept moving faster, letting airport security handle that one rabid fan as he continued to escort you to safety. But when he was finally behind closed doors, oh boy...

Vil was absolutely livid. His fingers ran over your hair, checking you over for injuries, and smoothing down the wrinkles in your outfit. All of his actions were gentle in contrast to his harsh tone and enraged expression. “How dare they try to touch you...?! Those disgusting no-good--– They have no right! Someone as lowly as them, would only sully you! Right now we need more guards! I cannot risk you getting hurt! Who knows what she would’ve done? From now on, you will be accompanied by an entourage of a dozen bodyguards. I will continue to stick by you and protect you. I’m sorry, my dear, you do not deserve to go through this. You only deserve the best.”

He gazed down at you through his lashes, his anger melting into regret. Damn it all, if only he had been more vigilant that night when the photograph was taken. If he had noticed, then none of this would be happening! “This will not break us apart, I will not allow it. You know I love you, despite all that’s happening and everything that is being said, right? I love you so much, so please be patient with me as I organize everything for your own wellbeing.”

#twisted wonderland #twst #twst writing #yandere twst #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere twisted wonderland x reader #vil schoenheit #twst vil #yandere vil schoenheit #soft yan vil

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justagalwhowrites · 5 months

Text

Halcyon - Ch. 1: Can I Buy You a Beer?

You run into someone you don't expect when out for a drink. A continuation of Halcyon, a modern no outbreak AU TLOU fic found on Tumblr here.

Yes it's a Javi gif but we're gonna say he's Joel because Joel is in his 30s for this fic, OK?

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Modern No Outbreak AU, No use of Y/N, Slow burn, 18+ only, Minors DNI

Length: 5.7K

AO3 | Prologue | Next Chapter

Austin, Texas

September 30, 2022

You were going to strangle Alyssa.

It sure as hell hadn’t been your idea to go out drinking to celebrate the end of the first month of the school year. Definitely not your idea to do it at a bar that looked like it hadn’t been cleaned this decade. And it absolutely was not your idea to try to pick up a guy while out at said dingy bar.

But it apparently was Alyssa’s idea of a good time.

You sighed as you watched people go to and from the bar from your seat tucked in the corner. You tried to come up with stories for the people you could see in the dim light, like they were characters in a book you were writing. The biker in a leather vest, you decided, had been an accountant for 20 years when he bought a Harley during his midlife crisis. He’d become a mechanic when he became too obsessed with the bike to be satisfied behind a desk. His wife was pissed but his son thought he was way cooler now. The couple at the end of the bar were on a second… no, third date. She was deciding whether or not to fuck him. You thought it was going to go in his favor.

Alyssa had moved out of the seat next to the guy she’d taken up with and into his lap. You wondered if there was a world record for how far someone’s tongue could be down another person’s throat. It had to trigger her gag reflex at some point, right? Or maybe she didn’t have one. That must be nice. Maybe that was the key to being good at oral. Maybe you’d be better at it if you didn’t have a gag reflex. Maybe you’d still have a husband if you were better at oral.

You downed the last of your Shiner and rapped your fingers along the side of the glass. That was one upside to being back in Texas, at least. Shiner Bock on tap was a nice perk.

Next time you went out with Alyssa, you were driving yourself. If there was a next time.

But you’d probably cave before too long. You didn’t have many friends and you liked her. Even though this night hadn’t been much fun and getting to know her at all had been awkward at first. Alyssa was a few years younger than you and the first time she’d stumbled into your office she had your book in her hands and a wide smile on her face.

“I am so sorry if this is weird,” she said after a brief introduction. “But… I’m in love with your book and I am dying for you to sign it!”

“Sure,” you laughed a little and she passed it to you. You flipped to the title page and scrawled “Alyssa, Thanks for reading. With love, your coworker” before you penned the signature you’d practiced a million times with your agent below and handed it back. She squeaked, a little giddy, before offering to show you the best restaurants near campus. You didn’t have the heart to tell her that you’d grown up in Austin so you had plenty of favorites without any extra help.

Still, you had this strange drive to have Alyssa see you as a normal person. Award-winning author famous was, thankfully, not the kind to get you recognized on the street but it still made you uncomfortable. Book signings and readings were exercises in misery. There was the acute agony of being observed and noted, the strange knowledge that, for these strangers, this brief encounter was going to be something they remembered. They’d remember if you had a mustard stain on your shirt or if there was lipstick on your teeth or if the stress you were under as you traveled from city to city while your marriage fell to pieces around you made you snap at someone. You never realized how keenly you valued anonymity until it wasn’t an option anymore.

The very last thing you wanted was someone who was a fan with an office two doors down from your own.

So, you’d decided to have her be a friend instead. Make it so she saw you as a person and not someone from the inside of a book jacket. The two of you had gone to lunch a few times and out for a quick drink once, too. It had been nice and, ever since, it felt like she had stopped watching you like a pseudo-celebrity and started seeing you as a friend. Or, at the very least, a friendly acquaintance.

So when she’d asked if you wanted to get some drinks tonight, you’d said yes, envisioning the lounge she’d suggested the first time you’d gone out, one with jazz music playing quietly enough that you could chat over it.

That was not where she suggested this time.

But you were already here and edging in on tipsy and if you were going to spend the night alone at a bar and, eventually, at home with your vibrator, you may as well be drunk doing it.

You made your way to the bar and ordered a tequila shot and another beer, drumming your fingers on the bar top as you waited for your drinks.

“Well hey there, beautiful,” a man who had to have at least 10 years on you sidled up next to you at the bar. “What’s a pretty thing like you doin’ getting your own drinks?”

“No one else was volunteering,” you gave him a tight smile. “But I’m not looking for company so…”

“Don’t tell me you’re here all by your lonesome?” He smiled a lopsided, cocky smile, looking you up and down. The accent felt a little heavy handed and the cowboy hat put it over the top. You wondered, idly, if he was hiding a bald spot under there.

“I prefer flying solo, but thank you,” you said, peering around him to watch the bartender flirt with a girl who looked like she was newly 21 and probably here slumming it at this bar that was far from the school. You sighed and settled in to wait even longer for your drinks.

“Girl as pretty as you shouldn’t be all on her own,” he said, leaning against the bar and blocking your view. “No way someone hasn’t snapped you up yet, a face like that…”

“Oh my face has nothing to do with it,” you smiled, forcing your eyes to go wide enough that you looked a little crazed. “It’s because I’m a murderous sociopath with six bodies buried beneath my house.”

The man just blinked at you, a puzzled look on his face. You could practically see the wheels turning in his head and you considered, for a moment, timing him to see how long it would take to piece it together.

“She’s right you know,” a familiar voice from behind you made you stiffen. “There's a reason she's here alone. This one’s insane, she’d chew you up and spit you out, man. Best you find someone else to try n’take home.”

“Sorry, man,” he said. “Didn’t know she was spoken for.”

You watched the man shove himself back from the bar and prowl off to find another woman to try and bed before turning, slowly, to the man standing at your back. Your heart beat picked up in spite of yourself when you saw him, as tall and broad and somehow even more handsome than ever.

Joel Miller smiled, one of his cocky, lopsided smiles that made his cheek dimple.

“Hey, Goldie.”

***

It was you.

Here, in this shitty bar in his corner of Austin on a Friday night was you.

Joel froze when he saw you, sitting in a corner by yourself, watching the bar with a far away look on your face.

It was a look he knew intimately, even though it had been 11 years since he’d last seen your face in person. You’d get that look when you were thinking about something important, something you wanted to remember. You’d have that look and then you’d open up that gold notebook of yours and write furiously for a minute or two before stashing it away.

“You ever gonna let me read any of that?” He’d teased one day as you sat, curled up in the corner of his couch, your notebook on your knees.

“No,” you scoffed. “Trust me, you don’t want anywhere near this disaster area. It’s basically just the word vomit version of my brain, it’s a mess up there.”

Joel didn’t push you on it but, truthfully, he’d have killed for a chance to see inside your mind for a moment. He wanted to crawl inside your skull and look at whatever you’d let him see. He wanted to memorize you, carry you with him, wrap himself up in you at every opportunity. You felt like home, more than anything else he’d ever had. Of course he wanted to be close enough to you to see inside your mind.

But that was a long time ago. Yes, it had been 11 years since he’d seen you but it had been even longer since he’d seen you when you weren’t pissed at him. In fairness, he was pretty pissed at you, too, but you’d started it.

And he wasn’t even sure why. He didn’t know what set you off to begin with. One night it was prom and the next thing he knew, you were gone. Taking off across the country before graduation without so much as a goodbye. You changed your number and your mom wouldn’t give it to him and you were just gone. Like the two of you hadn’t spent every day together for the last three years, like he had all meant nothing at all to you.

Joel saved up the money to buy a bus ticket to your fancy fucking college, intending to find you there and demand an explanation, but that hadn’t gone as planned. He just settled into not knowing and not understanding why the most important relationship in his life had been ripped away from him without a word.

But it had been a long time. He’d moved past the resentment of it and now he was all but awestruck at seeing you again.

“Hey, do you want…” Tommy’s voice trailed off and his eyes tracked where Joel’s were looking. “Holy fucking shit, is that…”

“Yup.”

“Did you know she…”

“Yup.”

Tommy was quiet for a moment.

“Know she was gonna be here?”

“Hell no.”

Joel caught a glimpse of his brother nodding out of the corner of his eye - he wasn’t about to stop looking at you, he was worried if he did you might disappear again - and sighed.

“You gonna talk to her?” Tommy asked after a moment.

“No idea.”

“Shit dude,” Tommy clapped his hand on Joel’s shoulder. “Good luck with… whatever the fuck is gonna happen there.”

Joel glared at him for a second but kept his eyes on you. One of the other guys on the crew went to get the first round, something he appreciated because it meant he could keep watching you at a distance. He wasn’t sure what the fuck to say to you and he wasn’t about to just go talk to you with nothing to say.

But then you went to the bar and a guy was clearly annoying the hell out of you and, before he really knew what he was doing, he was heading for you.

“Hey, Goldie.”

You looked at him for a moment. You looked as surprised to see him as he was to see you.

“Hey, Joel.”

He smiled a little wider.

“Can I buy you a beer?” He asked.

“You’re a bit late, I’m afraid,” you said. “Already put it on my tab. But that’s assuming the bartender remembers I exist which seems like it might be aiming a bit high…”

Joel hung over the bar and hit the top of it a few times.

“Hey, Jimmy!” He yelled. The bartender whipped his head around. “Stop fuckin’ around, get my friend her shit, yeah?”

“Yeah, yeah,” he said, turning back to the woman he was talking to for a second before making you a shot first and then pouring your beer. He set both in front of you at the same time.

“Thank you,” you said, both to Joel and to Jimmy, and you did the shot, wincing as the tequila went down.

Joel whistled

“Shit, you lookin’ to get fucked up?”

“Well,” you coughed a little on the liquor before taking a sip of beer. “I already need to take an Uber home because the friend I came with is currently being devoured by that charming gentleman over there…” You nodded to a man at a table against the wall, a brunette draped across his lap who looked to be surgically connected to the man at the mouth. “So I figured, fuck it, may as well get hammered.”

Joel laughed a little at that.

“Since you’ve got no one else to get hammered with,” he shrugged. “Want to do it with me? Catch up a bit?”

You thought for a second, taking a sip of beer.

“Sure,” you said. “Yeah, that sounds good.”

Joel got a beer, too, and followed you back to your table before he settled in beside you. Part of it felt so natural, being next to you, but it was so different, too. You were different, fuck knows he was different.

“So,” he said, watching you. “You’re in town.”

“I am,” you nodded.

“Visiting Anna?” He asked, even though he knew the answer. It had made news, the fact that you were coming to teach at UT.

“Work,” you said. “Moved back a few months ago.”

“So what do you do now?” He asked. “For work, I mean.”

“Teach, mostly,” you said. “I’m at UT now. Literature and creative writing.”

“Seems right up your alley,” he nodded. “Always liked that sorta thing. You ever write that book?”

You nodded, taking another sip of beer.

“Yeah,” you said. “Just one, though.”

“Ever publish it?”

“Yeah,” you nodded again. “A few years ago…” Joel laughed and you frowned. “What?”

“You really think I don’t know you wrote a fuckin’ book?” He asked. “Course I know you wrote a fuckin’ book. Jesus, Goldie, your name is on fuckin’ posters and shit! You think I live under a rock?”

You laughed.

“You dick!” You shoved him playfully. “Look, you’re basically illiterate, I didn’t want to assume…”

“Hey just because I do shit besides read does not mean I’m illiterate!” He laughed. “You’re just a nerd…”

“You only finished high school because I’m a nerd,” you rolled your eyes. “Pretty sure your coach was ready to make me an honorary member of the team since me hounding you about homework was the only thing that kept your ass grade eligible.”

“Oh, you were the MVP,” he smiled, watching you take another sip of your beer and you smiled that amused little smile, the one you had when you were humoring him, the same one you’d had since you were 15 years old. “No question about it.”

“Since you know all about me apparently,” you teased. “What’s been going on with you?”

Joel shrugged, taking a drink. Mostly to buy himself time.

Did he want to admit to you that he’d all but taken his life and driven it into the ground since he last saw you?

Not that he ever felt like he had much potential, anyway. You and his mom had been the only people who’d ever really seen anything in him. But then you left and she died and was he even failing anybody anymore? Certainly not himself. And everything he did now he did to make sure he didn’t fail his daughter who, for the last 10 plus years, had been the only thing in his life that made it seem like all the shit was worth something.

But he wasn’t sure he wanted to tell you about her, either. It seemed cheap, to bring her up in a bar to you of all people, one of the only reasons she existed in the first place.

“Kept busy,” he said instead with a shrug. “Workin’ construction. Roped Tommy into it about a year ago, too. His dumb ass kept getting into it with people, told him I wasn’t going to keep bailing him out of jail if he didn’t at least look like he was trying to get his shit together.”

You nodded and took another sip of beer.

“Do you like it?”

He shrugged again.

“Pays the bills.”

“Not what I asked, Joel.”

He looked at you. You were watching him in that keen way you had, your head cocked slightly to the side, your eyes looking at him like you could cut through everything, everything he ever had or was or would be, down into the lanky boy he’d been when he’d first met you.

“Not sure why it matters,” he said after a minute. “But it’s fine, I guess. Crew’s good. Work’s steady.”

“It matters because you deserve something that fulfills you,” you frowned slightly. “Don’t you think so?”

He laughed once, looking at you for a moment.

“Haven’t thought about shit that way in a while,” he said.

Since you left, he added silently. He didn’t say it. Wouldn’t say it, even though part of him wanted to. Wanted to demand an answer, wanted to yell at you, wanted to cry at you and make you answer for the destruction that you left behind you. Destruction that Joel wasn’t entirely sure he’d ever really recovered from, just found a way to live in the rubble of it all.

But you were here now, talking with him again.

“When was the last time we did this?” He asked.

“Did what?”

“Talked.”

You smiled a little.

“You mean besides the time you decided to yell at me about my romantic choices at my mother’s funeral?” You asked, brows raised. “Been a while.”

“Since prom?” He asked quietly.

He watched you clench your jaw before nodding and taking a drink.

“Since prom.”

Joel picked at the label on his beer bottle for a moment as you sat with your hands between your knees and looked anywhere but at him. Eventually, you picked up your drink glass again with your left hand and Joel traced your bare ring finger with his eyes.

“Thinkin’ I might have been right about the romantic choices,” he teased lightly and you frowned before he nodded at your hand.

“Ah, right,” you said, extending your hand in front of you and running your thumb over the inside of that finger like you would if there was a wedding band there. “Yeah, it turns out going on a book tour when your marriage is on the rocks isn’t the best way to handle things…”

“Shit,” he shook his head a little. “I’m sorry, Goldie, that…”

You scoffed.

“No you’re not,” you put your hand back in your lap. “You hated him. You said all of three words to Gale and you hated him…”

“OK first of all, his name was fucking Gale,” Joel cut you off. “And second of all, he was a fucking douchebag.”

You snorted into your beer, coughing and choking on it for a moment and Joel clapped you on the back as you held on to the table, trying to laugh and breathe at the same time.

“You alright there?” He asked, leaving his palm in the middle of your back.

“Fine,” you coughed, pounding your chest with your fist. “I’m fine, I just… It’s so funny, but Gale isn’t even his birth name.”

Joel gaped at you.

“You’re shitting me,” he said. “That asshole chose the name Gale?”

You nodded, still coughing and laughing.

“He did,” you said. “He did, he thought it made it sound him more authorial and academic, he changed it before he started teaching. His birth name is fucking Bradley - his mom still calls him Brad - and I only found out when filling out the marriage license.”

“What a fuckin’ dick,” Joel laughed, his hand still on you. He was touching you. He hadn’t touched you in so long and he was touching you. “Jesus Christ… Sorry if you’re still hung up on the guy but shit, you can do way better than that.”

“It’s fine,” you laughed, calming down a bit and nodding to yourself. Joel watched you, uncertain. “Really, it is. I’m not going to pretend like I entirely agree with you but… things look different once you’re outside of the marriage and not in it anymore… Anyway. You married? Kids?”

“Not married,” Joel said, still not sure how he wanted to tell you about Sarah. If he even should, if the two of you were going to just go your separate ways after tonight and never speak again it felt wrong to share her. “Not even dating, really. At least, nothing steady…”

You laughed.

“Christ, why am I not surprised?” You teased. “You always had a way with the ladies. Haven’t outgrown that yet I take it?”

Joel smiled a little.

“Why outgrow what’s fun?”

You smiled a little back.

“Fair enough,” you said. “Don’t you want that, though? Something stable?”

“Is anything stable?” He asked. “Shit, half the people we went to school with now are fuckin’ divorced, what difference does it make?”

“Yeah, I guess I am one to talk,” you said, polishing off your beer.

Joel winced.

“Fuck, not what I meant…”

“It’s fine,” you shrugged. “I just… it didn’t work out and that’s that, right?”

“Right,” he said, watching you closely for a moment. “Hey, since you’re lookin’ to get hammered and I don’t got shit else to do tonight… shots?”

You laughed a little.

“I don’t know that I want to get that hammered,” you said. “I’m not a teenager anymore…”

“C’mon, Goldie,” he teased. “It’s on me. Plus it was my birthday the other day, gotta do at least one with me for that.”

“Oh shit,” you said. “It was, wasn’t it? You turned 33 on… Monday? Monday, right?”

“Right,” he laughed. “So, you in?”

You laughed a little back.

“Alright,” you said. “You’ve sold me. But I’ve got the first ones, it was your birthday, after all.”

The two of you moved to open bar stools on the end of the bar and ordered the first two shots - tequila - and clinked your glasses together before downing them, slamming them down on the bar top when you were done.

“See?” Joel teased. “You still got it in you.”

“If you say so,” you coughed a little and then laughed.

“Another?” He asked.

You looked at him for a moment.

“Fuck it,” you said and Joel flagged down Jimmy and ordered another round.

By the time it was last call, your friend had come over to say goodbye, her lipstick smudged around her lips and the mouth of the man she’d been draped across, and the bar had gotten quiet, just a handful of stragglers left even on a Friday night.

It took a few shots but you’d given up on keeping any distance from Joel at all, your bar stool sitting against his, your body pressed against his side, your head on his shoulder.

“Hey Jimmy!” Joel slapped the bar top a few times. The man came over and leaned on the bar, looking at you tucked against Joel. “Think you can get me a cab?”

“Sure as hell not lettin’ either of you two idiots drive,” he replied, going to get the phone.

“Hey,” Joel nudged you. “Where… where do you live? Need an address, gonna get you home.”

You thought for a second and then devolved into half drunk laughter.

“I don’t know,” your words were slurred. “Oh fuck, I’ve only lived there like… a few… a few… fuck. When did I move?”

“Before the school year?” He asked.

“Right,” you nodded. “Prob’ly right, that’s… that’s when. S’not long. I don’t know where it is, oh shit…”

“S’OK,” he said, putting an arm around you. “Just… just come home with me, s’fine.”

“Yeah?” You asked, raising your head slightly. “You… you don’t mind?”

“Don’t mind, Goldie,” he said gently. “Never mind, not with… not with you.”

You nodded and dropped your head back to his shoulder.

Joel had to half carry you to the cab and you dozed off against him on the drive, pressing your warm, soft body against his, passed out enough that you were drooling on the shoulder of Joel’s t-shirt, soaking through to his skin. He didn’t mind.

“She gonna be alright?” The cab driver asked as Joel paid him and nudged you awake.

“M’fine,” you waved him off.

“You know this guy?” The man asked, watching you in the rear view mirror.

“Him?” You asked, brows raised. “‘Course I know him, this… he’s Joel, he’s my best friend, s’fine.”

The driver nodded once.

“Good,” he said. “Take care of her, alright buddy?”

“Sure,” Joel said, setting you down in the back of the cab. “Always have.”

He got out and went around to the other door, almost tripping on the curb, before tugging you out of the backseat and against his side. You laughed and then shushed yourself.

“Sorry,” you tried to whisper but failed. “S’late, I should be quieter….”

“S’fine,” he slurred. “The neighbors think I’m trash anyway, not gonna ruin my reputation…”

You snorted at that.

“Assholes.”

He helped you up to the front door and fumbled with the lock, the two of you stumbling in. Julie, Sarah’s babysitter, shot up off the couch, a groggy look on her face.

“Wha?” She blinked for a second.

You yelped and Joel shushed you.

“Sorry,” you failed at whispering again. “But Joel… there’s a teenager in… you’ve got a teenager on your couch.”

“Yeah, she does that,” he tried to whisper back. “S’fine. How’d it go, Julie? Everything OK?”

“All good, Mr. Miller,” she stretched and got up, meeting Joel in the entry way. “She went down at 9:30 after trying to talk me into watching Coyote Ugly…”

“Oh lord,” Joel sighed. “Last thing she needs is to get it in her head that she should be singin’ and dancin’ on a bar…”

“Don’t worry, I said no,” she smiled. “But I think one of her friends at school is obsessed with it, not sure how else she’d know about it… Anyway. How about you pay me next week?”

“Oh shit,” he said, going for his wallet. She laughed.

“Seriously, don’t worry about it,” she said. “Not sure you’d remember paying me right now and I’m even less sure you can count.”

“Thanks,” he said, grateful. “You drive safe, alright kiddo?”

“Will do,” she laughed a little. “Night, Mr. Miller. And Mr. Miller’s… friend.”

“Night!” You said, a little loud before clamping your hand over your mouth and laughing. Once the door was closed, you turned your attention back to him. “Ooooo you’re Mr. Miller now.”

“Yeah, I’m gettin’ old,” he said, guiding you inside. “Here, I’m gonna put you to bed and then I’ll take the couch…”

“You absolutely will not,” you snorted. “I’m… I can sleep on the couch, not… not letting you take the couch in your own house. ‘Specially not when you’re old enough to be Mr. Miller.”

“Goldie…”

“I will move and sleep on the floor.”

He sighed and started moving you toward the couch.

“You ever gonna be less stubborn?”

“Nope,” you popped your lips on the p as he set you down. He got the blanket Julie had been asleep under and draped it over you as you snuggled into the couch. “Hey Joel?”

“Hm?”

“Who was that girl?” You asked, eyes already closed. “Why… why did you have a teenager in your house? This is your house, right?”

“S’my house,” he said, tucking you in. “And don’t worry ‘bout it. Just go to sleep.”

You yawned.

“Thanks, Joel,” your voice was groggy. “For taking care of me. Missed you.”

He stopped and looked back at you for a moment.

“Missed you, too.”

He went to bed, trying not to think of the last time you’d fallen asleep on him.

***

The Morning After Prom

May, 2008

The pink and orange of dawn woke you up. You were on Joel’s chest, his shirt unbuttoned so you could feel his skin on yours and your dress was still bunched around your waist from when Joel had slid the straps down your arms the night before.

You enjoyed it for a moment. The feel of Joel’s skin, how his chest rose and fell with his breaths, how the early morning light caught in the curls that had broken free of the gel you were sure his mom had put in it the night before. He smelled good, like cologne - the kind that a man would wear, not the Axe shit that drenched the hallways of your school - and soap and a hint of sweat that just felt like the essence of him. You wanted to stay like this with him forever. Be this close, know him in this way. It felt right, it felt beyond just good.

And then you remembered, you weren’t supposed to be here.

“Joel,” you whispered, sitting up from him and shaking him gently but urgently. “Joel, wake up!”

“Hm?” He mumbled, groggy, his eyes opening slowly.

“We fell asleep,” you said, still whispering even though there was no one here to hear you. “We’re not supposed to be up here, we have to go!”

“Shit,” he blinked the sleep from his eyes and looked you over and you were suddenly fiercely aware of how naked you were, how the light of day was creeping in and casting over your exposed skin. Joel reached out and cupped your cheek. “Sorry, didn’t mean to pass out…”

“It’s OK,” you said quickly, clutching your dress over your naked breasts as you slid the straps back on. “But we should get home, we didn’t tell our moms that we were going to be out all night, I’m sure they’re pissed…”

“It’s prom,” he said. “Think they expected it to be a late one. But… you’re right, we should get going.”

Joel got up and offered you his hand, pulling you to your feet. It wasn’t until you moved your lower half that you realized how sore you were between your thighs, your skirt falling back down to your feet. Joel held your hand for a moment once you were standing and his skin felt hot against yours. You dropped his hand and cleared your throat awkwardly.

“You should button your shirt,” you said quietly, nodding to his bare chest. “And… um… Zip up your pants.”

“Oh,” he looked down. “Um… Right. Right.”

He moved quickly as you looked over as much of your dress as you could see and Joel used the glass of the press box as a mirror to adjust his hair.

“Do I look OK?” You asked when he was done, turning so he could see the whole dress. “Not like… not like we….”

“There’s… um…” he cupped the back of his neck awkwardly. “I think we made a mess of the back of your dress, I didn’t think… should have moved it, I guess…”

“Shit,” you twisted, trying to spot it. “Do you think…”

“Just don’t turn your back to your mom,” he said quickly. “Should… should be OK.”

“Right,” you said. “Yeah, that’s… right. OK.”

Joel led the way to his car and the two of you sat in silence on the ride home. You kept glancing at him out of the corner of your eye, his elbow propped on the door of the car, hand on his mouth, his face drawn.

What were you supposed to do now? You’d never done… this. You’d never been in this position and now you were here with Joel, the person who was your best friend, the person you knew better than anyone else in the world, the person that everything had felt so right with it had been impossible to stop.

But what did you do now?

He stopped in your drive way and sat there, staring straight ahead.

“Thank you,” you said. He looked at you, his eyes a little wide. “For taking me to prom, I mean. It was… I had… It was good. I liked it. It was good.”

“Yeah,” he nodded after a moment. “Yeah, I’m glad I… got to go with you. To prom.”

“Right.”

You looked at him. You wanted to kiss him. Wanted him to hold onto you and tell you that everything was going to be OK and that you were going to figure this out and it would be you and him together just like it always had been.

Instead, he tightened his grip on the steering wheel.

“I’ve got church this morning,” he said. “And then we’re goin’ to help my grandma in the afternoon so I don’t think I can see you until tomorrow…”

“I’ve got that doctor’s appointment in the morning,” you said. “So… I guess I’ll just… I’ll see you at school?”

“Right,” he said. “Yeah, right. I’ll… I’ll see you at school.”

You smiled tightly at him and leaned in slowly to kiss him on the cheek, hoping that he would turn his head and press his lips to yours the way he had the night before.

He didn’t.

“Thanks, Joel.”

“Yeah.”

You went inside and got undressed in your bathroom, looking at the stain on your dress, hoping you’d be able to get the stain of your blood and his come out before your mother noticed and it ruined anything else.

Next Chapter

A/N: Eeeeeeee! I'm so excited now that this story is properly going!

I hope you enjoy exploring Joel and Goldie with me. I really love their friendship and the way they care for each other and I think there's so much to explore with the both of them.

I do have an updates blog. Follow it here and subscribe for alerts when I post.

Thank you for being here! It really does mean so much to me to share this story with you. Love you!!

#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x oc #halcyon

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vanwritesfan-fiction · 6 months

Text

Addiction

Part One: A Chance Encounter

Warnings: Language, mentions of alcohol and being drunk

A/N: Ok, so not smut, but its coming, we have to set the scene first 😉

You felt your phone buzz in your hand, the screen illuminating your face in the dark dining room as you looked through your text messages. You rested your back against the bar located in the corner of the room.

Darien: Wish you were here. London is boring without you

You: That’s impossible. You’re literally in my favorite city right now

Darien: I’ve been in my hotel ever since work ended. My team went out to the pubs without me

You: You should really be going out with them

Darien: Always thought my first time in London would be with you. Love you

You: I-

You were stopped from responding by a glass of liquor being shoved in your face. You looked up to see Sierra in front of you, double fisting two glasses of what you suspected to be a rum and coke, your choice of drink for these industry events. You were among the Hollywood elite tonight in a New York City restaurant, celebrating some actor, whose name you couldn’t bother to remembers, fifth trendy and over-priced alcohol launch. You were far from a celebrity, but often made the guest list of these events on behalf of your boss. Working as the assistant for the VP of publicity at Atlantic Records admittedly had very few perks, one of them being able to rub elbows at parties with the latest TV heartthrob or whoever managed to be at the top of the Billboard 100 chart that week.

Did you sound a little jaded? Sure, but you were also borderline tipsy.

“Was that Darien?”, she asked, looking around the room as she took a small sip from her glass. “Ooh, Bad Bunny. That’s five.” Sierra bounced on her tippy toes as you narrowed your eyes to get a better look across the dark room. The two of you had spent the last hour trying to identify as many celebrities as you could. You were losing, having accidentally mistaken Kevin Jonas for Joe Jonas. You tried to argue that it was an easy mistake, given that they were brothers, but Sierra was unwilling to give you a pass.

“I don’t think that’s Bad Bunny, and yes. He just got done with his meetings for the day. He decided to stay in the hotel for the rest of the night I guess.” You took a big swig of your drink. You way past the part of the night where you were still feeling the effects of alcohol. “All of his colleagues went out to some bars.” You slipped your phone back into your clutch, tucking the bag underneath your arm again. You’d respond to him when you got home later.

“Dull Darien”, Sierra slurred her words as she giggled out the nickname she had given your boyfriend when you started dating over three years ago. You caught her just as she stumbled over her heels, making a mental note to watch how many drinks she had.

Sierra had been your best friend since essentially birth. Your moms were best friends, and you grew up two houses down from one another. When you were kids you were attached at the hip, and not much had changed over the years, as she became your plus one to all of these events. She knew you better than you knew yourself, and she was never shy about how she felt about your boyfriends. There had been Jerky Jacob, your high school boyfriend, Bossy Brian, a guy you had dated right out of college who Sierra was convinced was a narcissist, and finally Two-Timing Trey, who had earned the name for obvious reasons.

“Enough with the nickname, S.” You warned with a dramatic roll of your eyes, knowing she had no intention on stopping. “He’s not dull, he’s just-“ you were having a difficult time finding a word that wouldn’t edge her on. “He’s boring. Just say it. Not an exciting bone in his body.” You opened your mouth to object, but quickly closed it. Truthfully you had no defense. Darien was boring, and that was putting it nicely. The first time you met him, you definitely didn’t feel the usual butterflies of excitement, but you were just getting out of your relationship with Trey, and you weren’t looking for thrill or adventure, you were looking for safety, and if Darien was anything, he was safe.

“I’m just saying, you’re hot as fuck, you could probably have any guy you wanted. Hell, you could probably walk up to any of these celebs and go home with them.” You scoffed, tipping your glass up to get the last drop of top shelf rum. The dress you were wearing was borrowed from one of your stylists friends, a sequin cocktail dress from 16Arlington with a rather large peekaboo cutout at the front that showed off your cleavage. “Did you ever think that maybe I don’t want some random celeb. Maybe I like my dull boyfriend.” Your words sent Sierra into a fit of giggles, partially from her inebriation and partially because she knew you were lying through your teeth. “Please don’t pretend like if Drake came up to you right now, you wouldn’t jump at the chance to leave with him.”

“Damn, my money was gonna be on Brad Pitt. He seems like more your type.” You turned on your heels to see a tall figure, his chestnut curls hitting right at his eyebrows, a frame to his gorgeous blue eyes, the rest of his hair cut into a mullet. You immediately noticed his handsome smile as you studied his face. You had learned early on in your career how to identify which guys were someone and which ones were wannabes in this industry. He was tall enough to be an athlete, but too lanky. He still had life in his eyes, something that a lot of actors lost when they realized they were selling their soul for a recurring role on a CW drama. That left someone in the music industry. You recognized him, his face was hung up in the halls of Atlantic Records, but the name escaped you.

“He’s a little bit out of my age range. I prefer my actors to still have a will to live.” Your joke earned you a chuckle from the-, the mullet suggested alternative band, but the cocky stance and southern drawl to his accent made you think rapper- the rapper. “Well, tell me-“, he paused to allow you to fill the silence with your name. “Y/N, and this is Sierra.” You gestured at your friend who was having trouble standing up straight, her hand gripping the bar to steady herself.

“Well, Y/N, Brad Pits loss is my gain.” His words were suggestive, no doubt, but he spoke with such a confidence, you weren’t sure if he was actually flirting with you, or if that’s just how he talked with everyone. “I’m Jack.” He extended his hand out to you, and you cautiously accepted, quickly breaking apart.

“I know where I know you from. You’re Jack Harlow! I love your song”, she snapped her fingers carelessly, hoping it would jog her memory, “Business Class.” She punctuated her words with a hiccup.

“Close enough.” He chuckled, his gaze never leaving your face. He was trying his hardest not to look down at your body, even though he thought you looked fucking gorgeous. “I thought I recognized you from somewhere.” Jack’s eyebrows perked up when you spoke. “I see your face every day on my way to work.” You could tell you lost him when his face fell. “Sorry, I should probably explain. I work for Jason.” You could see the dots quickly connecting in his mind. “Oh, fuck yeah, I love Jason. He’s keeps me out of trouble.”

You felt your phone vibrate against your side. You were inclined to ignore it until you felt it pulse a few more times. “Sorry, I have to get this.” You just missed Jack’s look of disappointment as you looked down at your phone.

Darien: Couple of pictures of the view from my hotel. Wish you were here.

You scrolled through the photos, all different, slightly out of focus angles of the Thames. Leave it to Darien to also take the most boring pictures.

“Must be really important.” Your head shot back up at Jack, who was now resting his elbows atop the bar. “Oh, it’s nothing.” You shook your head as your phone slipped back into your bag. “Just a family member.” You weren’t sure why you lied in the moment. Jack didn’t know you, and besides the initial flirting, he wasn’t trying to make a pass at you. At least as far as you could tell; you were just starting to sober up.

“Let’s ask Jack.” Sierra was now standing in the middle of the two of you, leaning a little too close to Jack for comfort. He backed up as he smelled the vodka on her breath. “Jack, Y/N is dating this guy right now, and I think he’s just the most boring person on the planet.” Jack looked at you with a smirk on his face as you tried to hide your embarrassment, feeling the heat creep up your neck. Jack was hotter than any guy you had previously dated and was already more exciting than your current boyfriend just in five minutes of conversation.

“I mean, the only thing he likes talking about is Game of Thrones and his Lego collection.” Sierra continued, ignoring your pokes to her side to get her to shut up.

“He sounds like a fucking nerd.” Jack uttered under his breath, but you heard him loud and clear. Sierra did as well, frantically nodding her head. “He totally is.” She lowered her head, most likely thinking that was going to help her whisper, but her next words were loud above the blaring music. “Plus, she told me the sex is terrible. Like he barely lasts for more than a couple minutes.” You caught the look of smugness on Jack’s face as he listened to how unsatisfying your current sex life was.

“Okay, I think that’s enough. Time for you to go home.” You yanked at Sierra’s arm, causing her to fall into Jack. He caught her just in time, helping to hold her up. You roughly grabbed her phone out of her hand, pulling up the Uber app. “Fuck”, you cursed under your breath, seeing that the closest Uber was about 30 minutes away and surge pricing had gone into effect.

“Hey, I’ve got a car waiting that you guys are more than welcome to use to get back to your place.” Jack could tell you were more than done with the night, and he hoped his gesture would smooth out your less than successful meet cute. “Are you sure, we really can wait for an Uber.” As if she had timed it, Sierra’s knees buckled, Jack catching her under her arms. “I’m sure.

****

You rubbed your hands up and down your arms, crossing them over your chest as you left the venue. It was colder now than when you arrived, and you were wishing you had that coat that was laying on your bed back at your apartment. Jack followed behind you, Sierra’s arm draped over his shoulders for support. You quickly located the black SUV waiting at the curb, and opened the door, watching as Jack helped Sierra into the back of the vehicle, immediately slumping over to lay across the seats.

“Thanks, Jack, I really appreciate you letting us borrow your car. How are you gonna get back?” You looked at your feet as you asked the question, resisting the urge to look up at his face; his eyes were even brighter underneath the streetlights.

“I’m actually staying right there.” He pointed across the street to a tall metropolitan style building, the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel. He stuck his hands into the front pocket of his trouser pants, his shoulders pinned to his ears as he tried to stay warm as well. “The car was just in case I wanted to head to another party, but the hotel bed sounds a lot more appealing right now.” There was that tone again, so suggestive, as if he was inviting you to his hotel room as well. “Have a good night, Y/N. Hope I see you again.” He extended his hand out, his nails perfectly manicured, and you found yourself wondering what his hands would feel like exploring your body. You let that thought ruminate in your head for a second before coming back to reality. You grabbed his hand, returning the gesture, the two of you lingering on the sidewalk. “Goodnight.”

Jack watched as you climbed into the vehicle next to Sierra, before jogging across the street to his hotel.

“He seemed like a nice guy”, Sierra remarked as she rested her head against your shoulder, closing her eyes, “and he was hot as fuck.” She let out a hum of amusement as she started to drift off to sleep.

“Yeah, such a nice guy.” You flipped the room key around in your hand that Jack had planted there. You grazed your thumb over the engraved letters, “The Waldorf Astoria Hotel, Room 1423”, emblazoned in gold lettering on the plastic card.

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#jack harlow #jackman thomas harlow #jackharlow #jackman harlow #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow imagine #jack harlow fanfic

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anyaeras · 16 days

Text

I Didn't Deserve you || N.Romanoff

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Pairing: girlfriend!Natasha x gender neutral Reader

Warnings: Angst, mention of death, cute start, kinda sad ending, emotional abuse

Summary: y/n just wanted to enjoy theirs and Natasha anniversary, but everything went south.

Masterlist

──────────────────────

Being the partner of an avenger isn't always easy going. Often times special dates, and events are pushed off but y/n always understood how important Natasha's job was; and Natasha was great full to have them. At first their relationship was one you would see in the movies, soft and sentimental, but as time went by y/n saw less and less of their girlfriend, Nat would stay at work late, come home to tired to spend time with them. Y/n's love never died down for the red headed widow though.

Today was their 2 year anniversary. Y/n was home dancing around their apartment kitchen as she made a pasta meal for the each of them. As soft music rang from the smart speaker the clock showed 7:45pm. Natasha was out training but swore she would be back in time to celebrate this milestone with her lover.

As y/n set the table finishing it off with fresh flowers in the vase on their little circle dinning table, one which was perfect for the two of them. From that point y/n waited, well and waited...

The clock would tick, and the food was long cold. The time now read half past eleven and y/n was growing tired of waiting for Natasha. They were full of emotions, frustrated, betrayed but most of all disappointed that she had put so much effort to do something special for their girlfriend only too be stood up.

Doing their best to stay awake in hopes of their red headed girlfriend to come home any moment was becoming rather hard. Y/n grew overly tired falling asleep while waiting for on the small sofa in the living room.

12:45am, keys were heard as Natasha softly walked into her shared apartment. Staying silent to not disturb her girlfriend. Stepping inside the trained spy immediately noticed the plates of food on the table with a candle that had long burnt down. Looking around now moving towards the living room Natasha's heart broke. Her partner way asleep on the sofa, still dressed nicely, clearly they had cleaned up for Nat and she was...extremely late.

Natasha bent down in from of a sleeping y/n, slowly rubbing her fingers in y/n hair to wake them. As y/n slowly started to stir the black widow could only fear what her partners reaction may be.

"Natasha?" Y/n's sleepy voice called out as they regained consciousness. Sitting up y/n's face dropped to a frown as they stared back at their girlfriend.

"Y/n, my bad I was just get-" Natasha started yet was cut off by Y/n's huff

"Don't. You do this every time Nat! I just asked for one day! One day for us! Did you not care?" Y/n rattled off as they stood up clearly each phase they spoke they grew more distressed with Natasha.

Natasha was quick to reach out for y/n in hopes to calm them down yet was of course dodged.

"I'm not your toy, I'm not here for when you're bored, I'm not your second choice Natasha!" Y/n huffed as she had grabbed her keys and thrown a hoodie over her outfit.

Y/n stormed out of the apartment heading straight for the stairs before wandering out into the dark night.

Wandering for what felt like hours, it had started to rain as y/n felt the water seep into their clothing yet they were too damn stubborn to even face Natasha right now. Every night was becoming the same blur, y/n waiting up for Natasha, loads of ignored messages and maybe Nat would come home. The pain of waiting was taking a toll and for once y/n wanted her to feel it back.

Y/n seemed to get lost in thought as the walked, leaving their phone behind seemed to be working in their favor at this point. Cars went by, speeding on the main roads right beside her, sounds of crickets could be heard even in the city. Heading to the cross walk as y/n finally chose to start heading back home. As the red hand turned to the Walkman, y/n on autopilot started to cross, about half way through everything went dark.

Ring Natasha phone lit up at half past 2, expecting it to be y/n Natasha quickly looked at it, yet was surprised to see a random number. Yet she answered nonetheless

"Is this Natasha Romanoff, you're on y/n y/l/n's emergency contacts, they were in an accident, unconscious" a voice spoke to Natasha yet the words seemed to just flood her with panic.

"I'll be right there." Was all Natasha said before rushing out the door

Fast. It happened so fast, adrenaline never felt like this, adrenaline was fun, it was an exciting feeling to remember this time there was no memories. Just black space, and soft sound. Beeps...beep.

"Y/n? Are you awake" her sharp yet soft Russian accent made its way to y/n's ears, yet your eyes far to heavy to open. But a soft squeeze to the hand, which connected with their own showed that they could hear Natasha words.

"детка (Detka) you have to wake up, please. I'm really sorry I didn't stop you, I should've protected you I'm so sorry y/n" Natasha's words followed by her soft cries hurt y/n just as much as the crash had. Not being able to respond was even harder. Listing to Natasha try and communicate and fix something was new, and y/n just had to lay there. Natasha's soft wishes didn't stop but they began to sound far away, the once light that shined through now faded to black once again, as if it was the start of a peaceful sleep.

The beeping became more like a long drawn out ding as if it became a straight line. Making Natasha panic inside.

Nurses rushed into the hospital room shoving Natasha aside, her once locked hand with y/n's was pulled apart as nurses did their best to keep y/n responding.

Nurses frantic actions slowly came to a complete stop, the beep would now fall into background noise.

"I didn't deserve you" was the final thing Natasha got out, her hand holding now not her partners hand, but the ring box's she had brought home that night.

#natasha romanoff x reader #marvel #lgbtqia #writing #marvel mcu #fanfic #marvel edits #marvel fic #anyaeras #angst #black widow x reader #natasha romanoff #natasha romanov #the black widow #wlw fiction

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gyustarzzi · 4 months

Text

celebrating new years with ateez

★ hongjoong

you guys baked together

you and hongjoong decided to do a competition to see who could make the best 2024 cookies for the new year and whoever won got to choose what the loser would do for them

while you were making the batter for your cookies hongjoong wanted to mess you up and put a smudge of flour on your face

mess everywhere: flour on the kitchen counter, cookie batter chunks in your face, and icing covered all over

even though you guys were messy you still ended up making the cookies and decided to go and take a nice hot shower together

" You got a little something right there "

☆ seonghwa

took you on a trip to Paris for the holidays

you guys were actually planning to leave on December 30 to get home on time for the new years but your flight got delayed

you knew you guys wouldn't be able to make it home on time for the new years, so you spent it in the city of Paris

took you on a midnight picnic to watch the fireworks on the beach, ending it with a midnight walk back to you apartment

don't worry you made it home after new years to give ateez their presents you bought

" Our plans might have been ruined but I'm glad I got to spend the new years with the love of my life "

★ yunho

you guys made a scrapbook while waiting for the ball drop

you and yunho decided why not to get all the printed pictures you have of each other and put all of them in a homemade scrapbook

you guys put stickers, doodles and lots of glitter all inside and outside of the scrapbook

you guys laughed, cried, and shared some of the most fondest memories together while make the scrapbook, giggling once in a while when yunho puts a little bit of glitter glue on your face

at the end of the night right when the clock is going down for the ball drop you guys take on final picture together kissing with stickers and glitter glue all on your face

" Remember that time I punched you in the face? Good times "

☆ yeosang

you guys recreated your first date

took you to the same restaurant, ordered the same food, and then went to the same arcade

honestly was kinda shocked he remembered everything even though you guys had been dating for some time now

wins you a bunch of prizes and plays a lot of games letting you win some but still beating you in almost everyone

takes you to the ice cream shop where you guys share a cone as you watch the fireworks

" You arms look heavy carrying all those stuffed animals, pass them over "

★ san

you guys went to a friends party, more like wooyoungs party

what better way to spend new years eve than get totally wasted at a party with your boyfriend

lots of beer pong, chatting hazily with random people you don't even know and plenty of times where you spill drinks on you and other people

you start to get sober at the end of the party and notice the countdown is happening for the ball drop

you hurriedly search for san, bumping into people left right when suddenly you see san also searching for you

you both make eye contact rushing towards each other, embracing into each other and kissing right when the countdown goes to 0

" Happy New Year y/n, may all your resolutions come true "

☆ mingi

you guys had a movie marathon

picked out every last movie you both love to watch until the clock hits 12

lots of cuddling, eating snacks, and laughing together at stupid scenes in your favorite movies

when you catch each other almost falling asleep you tickle each other turning the movie marathon into a tickle party

when the clock strikes 12 you both hug each other giving mingi a loving kiss before falling asleep on the couch together, too tired to go upstairs to your cozy bed

" The next time you tickle me I will throw you off this couch and that's not a threat, it's a promise "

★ wooyoung

you and wooyoung hosted a family party

you invited all of your family and wooyoung invited all of his family

lots of baby photos shared of you and wooyoung making you both embarrassed but laughing it off

you don't even see him the whole time during the party because either your mom is telling him stories about you or he's being bombarded by children

right when the clock hits 12 your's and wooyoungs parents start telling you guys to kiss, which you gladly do

" We should do this again sometime "

☆ jongho

you guys went on cruise

you and jongho decided why not spend new years eve on a cruise ship

you played lots of arcade games jongho winning a LOT of games winning you multiple prizes

you also did a good amount of water slides some getting over your fears of heights and others not so much

you guys both sat at the bar drinking cocktails and watching the fireworks in the night sky

" You sure you could ride that water slide? Okay, I don't wanna hear any crying after "

#ateez #reactions #wattpad repost #hongjoong #seonghwa #yunho #yeosang #atiny #fanfiction #kpop #san #mingi #wooyoung #jongho #gyustarzzi #preferences #ateez reactions #ateez preferences

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kittenwalker · 1 year

Note

just evan talking about reader in an interview with Jimmy fallon and him being hellaaaaaaaa whipped for her and everyone is like Awwwwwweeeeee

you asked and shall receive :)

notes : imagine this story being put in 2019 after evan filmed for dark phoenix. Also I'm starting to get more time to write so expect more stuff to come ;) enjoy xxx

“ Hello everyone! Welcome to tonight’s show hosted by me, Jimmy Fallon. Tonight we have a special guest who so kindly flew all the way here to New York City. Now put your hands together for… Evan peters! “

Evan came out from behind the curtains and gave a wave as he walked out, sitting down on the famous blue chair beside Jimmy’s desk. The applause started to lower down as Jimmy spoke.

“ Okay, we only have about 30 minutes with Evan today as he is busy. So we are going to speed things up a little during tonight’s show. Alright, welcome Evan it is really nice to have you here today despite your busy day. Let’s start off with your experience in New York City, how is it so far? “

“ Well I’m a hot mess, I landed here at about 5 in the morning and was really jet-lagged. But other than that I’m having a great time here, I also did uh explore some of the cool places around New York. Like Central Park, The Metropolitan Museum Of Arts and Time Square. I’m actually leaving tomorrow morning and uh am going to definitely miss the drunken people on the streets who always bump into me. “ Evan joked, making the crowd and Jimmy laugh.

“ It’s nice to know that you are enjoying your time here in the city I grew up in, but now let’s jump into your newest movie you filmed for. In Dark Phoenix you acted as Peter Maximoff and there are a lot of cool moments for your character but one thing I’m most curious about is when Peter runs and his face gets all dented, how does that work? “

“ Alright, so basically a guy with a leaf blower literally just blows the strong air onto my face while I’m running on a treadmill. It’s definitely was um one of the most uncomfortable but funniest things I have done so yea that’s kinda how it works. “ he explained with a smile

After hearing Evan’s response, the audience burst out laughing and applause for him. Making Evan himself laugh at the funny memory. They talked a little more about his character and his experience on set and being in his last X-men movie. Until Jimmy checked his watch and saw he had about 12 minutes left and decided to move to his last question. Jimmy pulled out a board with an Instagram post printed onto it. It was Y/n’s post, Evan’s girlfriend, it captioned ‘ Happy 4th anniversary my love ‘ while the picture was her licking sauce off his lips as Evan made a goofy face.

“ So um what is happening in this picture? “ Jimmy asked, chuckling at the funny photo.

Evan burst out into a bright smile, which is very contagious, while putting a hand over his forehead and shaking his head. Y/n showed him the picture that day and told him she was going to post it, but he thought she was joking not knowing she actually posted it.

“ So uh it was our 4th anniversary a few days ago and of course, we went to celebrate it. We went to lunch first and I ordered some mushroom soup, when I was drinking it some of the soup got onto my mouth. Then she came over to my side and just licked it off while snapping a picture of it, yea the story is exactly what the post shows you. Also after that, I surprised her by driving her back to where we had our first date. It was a drive-in movie theatre and we kinda just sat in the car while watching a rom-com. It felt very nostalgic and nice, like going full circle. “ Evan told the story while smiling to himself as the great memories flowed back.

“ Woah that is very thoughtful of you and sounds like the perfect anniversary night “

“ Well yea because I’m the best boyfriend “ he joked with a smug face

The crowd laughed and some agreed with him.

“ No no of course I’m joking, it’s all Y/n she deserved it. She really is the best partner I could ever ask for. Y/n is very caring and would always make me dinner, take care of me when I’m sick and would always be by my side. During my Kai Anderson days, whenever I came back home from uh a hard shooting day she would either listen to my rants then make me a bubbly bath. Or when I don’t really feel like talking she would put on a movie and we would cuddle while watching it. Y/n is really like a gift sent from god for me and I’m very grateful I laid my eyes on the most beautiful person and initiated the first move. “ Evan could go on forever about his love.

The audience awed and clapped their hands as he said his sweet warm speech dedicated to his darling, Y/n.

“ You must love her a lot Evan, I’m glad you found the right person but it’s now sadly the end of our time. It was my pleasure to have you here to chat with us, and everyone that’s Evan Peters! Go watch Dark Phoenix, streaming in theatres now! “

A few hours after the interview

Y/n was scrolling on her phone, finding a video to entertain herself while she does a few chores. Scrolling through her recommendation page until she stumbled upon something which caught her eye, Evan’s interview with Jimmy. She forgot Evan had travelled to New York City to do a Tonight Show with him, 10 hours ago it stated. It’s quite recent so she decided the chores could wait awhile, she had to watch her love first.

Sitting down on the couch she intently watched the 10 minute long clip, until it was when she reached the near end of the video. Y/n listened to his loving words about her as he looked so passionate while talking about her. She was so touched by his words it brought tears to her eyes without her even knowing. His words really did something to Y/n, made her heart burst and made her stomach do flips just like the first time she met him.

Y/n knew he was the one. The light to her darkness, the one she’s going to marry and spend her forever with. The one who makes her forget everything when he smiles or does the smallest things. The man who makes her feel like she’s having a teenage crush all over again. The man named Evan Peters.

#evan peter smut #evan peters #evan peter fluff #evan peter x reader #evan peters x you #evan peters x y/n #evan peters imagine #evan peters one shot #evan peters drabble #evan peters blurb #ahs #tate langdon #kit walker #kyle spencer #james patrick march

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filmofhybe · 5 months

Text

icy warm Christmas.

🗯️ pairing : sunghoon x oc 💌 Genre : fluff , college love 890 wc

warning : swearing , loneliness , kissing , no proof read

; AUTHORS NOTE : Day 2 out of 24 of “24 days of Christmas with Filmofhybe” !! Hope you guys enjoy this one as much as I did. Stay warm and enjoy :)

Master-list to my other works

“I’ll miss you so much y/n, but I’ll come back before you know it ok?” Yoona turned around, pulling me in her warm embrace before giving me a last look as she drags her suitcase behind her. “Stay safe Yoona! Remember to send me pictures!” I yelled as she walks further down the hallway. “I will!And I’ll get all the stuff you want! Stay warm!” She smiled one last time before stepping into the black fancy car. Waving to me until she disappears into the city of freedom.

I quickly close the dorm door before running my hands together, trying to gain warmth. Wrapping it around my body to prevent getting a cold. The common room was quiet, it was like I’m the only one here, maybe I am.. or not.. Still kinda disappointed that I couldn’t celebrate Christmas with my family, all because they said they weren’t home during it. Knowing very well it was either their work or they went somewhere without me. Is ok I’m used to it..

I Continue to walk back to my room before realizing the one and only - Park Sunghoon. He was nice, a very tall and slim boy that’s really famous for his amazing ice skating skills and his charming looks. He looked really cozy in front of the fireplace while scrolling through his phone. I think I was staring at him for a bit too long as he snaps me out of my thoughts.

“Hey are you ok? You’ve been standing there for almost 2 minutes.” Fuck did I just embarrassed myself in front of him.. “right I’m sorry, imma leave now..”

“No stay, is probably just the both of us.” Confused as I walked over to the couches. Sitting on one of the single seat couch.

“I’m not going back this Christmas either so is just the two of us.” He replied as he continue to scroll on his phone. Is like he’s addicted to it.

“Yeah I guess, if you need anything I’ll be here.” I smiled slightly as I’m ready to just lay in my cozy warm bed for the rest of the holiday.

“Maybe we could celebrate Christmas together?” He finally looks up from his phone, his dark blue hoodie made his jawline so much more defined. Making me fold on the spot.

“Of course. I don’t mind.” I accepted his offer before standing up, dragging the blanket along with me back to my room.

Such a cutie. Sunghoon thought.

“You look fine! Is just sunghoon-“

“IS JUST SUNGHOON? No is not just sunghoon, he’s the literally every girls dream man and now that we have the whole dorm to ourselves, plus he’s taking me out for Christmas is crazy.”

“And you say you don’t have a crush on him..” Yoona whispered, as if I didn’t heard her.

“This is why i shouldn’t tell you about this.” Slamming my Face into the palm of my hands, hearing a knock from the door making me jump up.

“Oooo your date is here~ tell me how it goes! I love you bestie!” Yoona quickly ended the call. I have no time to freak out right now, quickly grabbing my phone and purse, slipping on my heels as I opened the door.

Revealing sunghoon, in a Long black coat, Dress pants along with black turtle neck that highlighted his jawline, which stood out so much more sharper than the last time I saw him, pairing it with black shoes and black thick scarf. Man I didn’t even realize how fine-

“Hey, you look amazing by the way. These are for you.” He smiled. For the first time. His hand holding onto my (f/f) with a little dior bag, assuming it was a gift for me. “Aww thank you so much hoon. You didn’t have to.” I gave him a little hug as a close friend gesture. His cologne filled my nose. Making my heart beat faster than the feeling you get when you open your gift on Christmas Day.

The dinner went amazing, we laughed and got to know each other so much more. We realized we could bond over our music taste and taste in books. Promising our next “date” will be at a book café instead of a fancy restaurant that could see the whole view of Seoul.

The moment we stepped out of the, cold air and snow greeted us. I was amazed by the winter white scenery in front of me.

“Hey take my scarf. I know you’re cold.” Before I could answer, he wrapped his scarf around my neck. Covering my mouth. Staring at his soft face made me realize no one treated me better than a man I started talking to 23 days ago.

Sunghoon’s Pov:

“Hoon let’s go play wit the snow!” Watching y/n being so cheerful like a child that has just seen snow for the first time makes my heart swell. She really is getting more comfortable around day by day. Remembering how shd was slightly uncomfortable at the beginning to clinging around my arm. Not even realizing how much this lovely girl makes me smile without even trying.

I watched her as she spin around in the snow. Quietly snapping a few pictures of her before admiring her beauty.

“Hoon are you not enjoying this?” Her figure appeared so tiny with my scarf around her. How adorable could you be..

“I do enjoy it, especially with you, but I think is time to go back before you catch a cold ‘kay?” I told her as I took her hand, holding them inside my coat pockets. Leading her back to the campus.

“Thank you for tonight, it was really fun.” Time went by so fast with sunghoon. Both of you now in the middle of the common room. His scarf still around your neck.

“You’re welcome, hope we can do it again soon.” Doubtfulness in his voice. Making you confused.

“Hey what’s up? Why the doubt in the voice.” You slightly chuckled, to try to lighten up the mood.

“Because you will probably hang out with your other friends. Meanwhile I’m here just doing whatever as I stare at you from afar, having fun and smiling. But I’m not the reason of the laughs and smile. I know we only just stared hanging out but you really showed me something I know i would cherish even if we never hang out again.” He confessed. He saw your eyes widen, not saying a single word. Assuming this is you rejecting him, losing hope,he started to walk away.

“Wait hoon! I Like you and your presence as well. It made my Christmas so much memorable this year.” He sees your eye smile, heart melting. Standing closer to you as he slide his arms around your waist. Looking at your eyes.

“I hope it isn’t too soon to do this..” he pulled down the scarf from your mouth, tilting your head up as he leans in, kissing your sweet Cherry lip balm lips. Surprised that you instantly returned back the kiss and feeling you smile into the kiss.

Pulling away as both of you just stare at each other before laughing. “You really made my cold Christmas a lot more warmer this year.”

“And I’ll always be there to make it warmer, each Christmas and everyday my love.”

filmofhybe on tumblr — do not copy , translate or share.

#kflixnet #k films #k lables #k neighborhood #🥥 하이브의 영화 #⛸️*.❅·🧣⋆ 24 days of christmas with filmofhybe #sunghoon enhypen #enhypen imagines #enhypen x reader #enhypen scenarios #enhypen fanfiction #sunghoon fluff #park sunghoon #enhypen smau #enhypen drabbles

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kaylinalexanderbooks · 18 days

Text

OC questionnaire

Thanks to @illarian-rambling here and here, @mk-writes-stuff here, @somethingclevermahogony here, @mysticstarlightduck here, and @elsie-writes here.

Ahh these built up again!!

I did another one here where I answer for Robbie, Gwen, Maddie, Noelle, Jedi, and Kelsey.

I'll do the same and answer one OC for each set.

#1- Carmen

Theoretically, since she'd never answer these willingly

What's your favorite legend and why?

“I suppose the one about the cloud riders from Atsila's culture. Maybe because of her, maybe because I like the idea of uncontrollable things being controlled.”

How do you celebrate your birthday?

“I don't. Bad memories. But Jedi makes sure to do something kind for me.”

What's something you'd regret if you died without doing?

“Not finishing what Atsila started. And also organizing the entire base. And the online data collection. And the lab. The alphabet. The local library --”

#2- George

What's the best thing you've ever eaten?

“Oh my powers DEFINITELY the mini cake thing from Ceteri. Cupcake? Yeah that. It was chocolate I think. Don't know about the frosting. I ate way too many last time Noelle brought them. She's warming up to me.”

What's the worst injury you've ever had?

“Physical or emotional? Haha sorry - I have injured myself quite a bit while running at top speeds. We speedsters have faster... Everything *wink* - but I mean I can heal faster which is very helpful. But even with a faster runtime, I make the same mistakes as everyone if I'm distracted. I've hit things, and at top speeds *cringe* yeah it's not fun. Ran into a concrete wall once. Concussion and a few broken bones. More than a few. Eh, I walked it off.”

Do you wish you looked different?

“Nah. Pretty happy with how I look! I guess I wouldn't mind Carla's eye color. That is not fair - neither of our parents even have amber eyes. What recessive gene did she pull out?”

#3- Akash

What is your favourite weather?

“When it's sunny, but not hot. Nice breeze. Not too cold or harsh. Just...total peace. Robbie likes it a little cloudy. I dunno, maybe that's cozy for him. But I happen to like the outside.”

Where would you want to take someone to hang out or on a date?

“For me, I wouldn't mind the classic dates. Movies, dinner. But Gwen... I'd do something special. A cultural gallery or a bookstore. Maybe a play. A Superman-esque flight around the city perhaps.”

What’s your least favourite food?

“Oh my gosh man - I hate asparagus. So many people like it, but I'm sorry. Can't stand the stuff.”

#4- Sam

What is the strangest thing you've ever stolen?

“In fourth grade, this girl Emma brought a laser pointer to school. Well, it was a pen with a built-in laser pointer. I thought it was cool. So I had to stay after school for the music play I was in, and as I was walking from the bathroom, I saw the pen on the floor. I picked it up. Emma was a little rude, so I kept it. She never asked around for it, so I felt okay after that! Plus, I couldn't pass up the opportunity for a pen laser pointer!”

What is your least favorite food?

“Mustard. Can't stand it. Wait, does that count as a food? Okay, nevermind. Uh.... Tomatoes. It's a texture thing.”

Who is the strongest person you know?

“Akash for sure. He's been through a lot of crappy things, and people treated him meanly for stupid reasons. But he's still so positive and helps a lot of people! Plus he's probably the funniest person I know besides my brother. But Akash is just as much a brother to me as Robbie.”

I don't think I've posted much about Sam - other than her excerpts. That was fun!

#5- Lexi

What's your worst fear?

“Oh. Okay. Wow. Um, well, there's my actual phobia of physical contact, haphephobia. Not sure if that counts or not. I guess other than that, it's losing all my friends. Most of my elementary school friends went to different middle schools, so I haven't seen them in person for a while. I don't want to lose anyone else. Ever. I'm not sure what I'd do.”

What's your love language?

“Well, it's not physical touch! *Laughs* I guess quality time. Actively doing things with someone else. That's the best I could ask for.”

When are you the happiest?

“When I'm with my friends! Just whenever we're doing whatever! As long as they're happy, and we're happy together.”

#6- Ash

Would you ever get high and if so, what is your drug of choice?

“First of all, I'm thirteen. Second of all, yeah probably - it'd be a fun risk to take. Not sure what drugs I'd take though. *Pauses* Hm. There are these devices I found that stimulate my telepathy. I wonder if those are anything like drugs. If they are, then whatever those are most similar to.”

Three things you would buy at the store to freak the cashier and the person behind you out

“Walmart has these cheeseburger onion rings I noticed last time I was with Mary. I may buy that just to make the cashier think I have terrible taste. In actuality, I'm just curious. Maybe an urn or something dark. Ooh. A pregnancy test. That would freak a lot of people out. *Pause* Was that too dark?”

What stupid opinion are you willing to die for?

“That American cheese tastes good. Liam told me it tasted like plastic. I'll admit, I need to try more cheeses. He was right about that. But plastic? Come on. He's just mad that Muenster isn't a Canadian invention.”

Why is writing Ash so HARD

Tagging @jezifster @sleepyowlwrites @dyrewrites @willtheweaver @theeccentricraven @writeouswriter @tabswrites + ANYONE

Your questions are:

How good are you with people?

How would you function in a group project?

What's your most valuable possession?

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

#the secret portal #tsp #teaspoon #carmen asghar #george baxter #akash singh #sam stafford #lexi morgan #ash hathaway #oc tag game #writing tag game #my ocs #oc questionnaire #writers on tumblr #writing community #writers of tumblr #writing on tumblr #writeblr #writeblr community

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127luvr · 8 months

Note

Hi, it's me again...the Jaemin content requester. So I just realized that Jaemin's BIRTHDAY is tomorrow August 13 and I want to request a birthday special for him to celebrate his birthday...

I already read so many birthday theme Oneshot and I see that some of them (but more likely most of them) are all the same story line and I want mine to be different but not that different....I guess

Like the storyline goes....

It's Jaemin's BIRTHDAY and he is still on their tour so he is not able to celebrate with Y/N and also three days after Jaemin's BIRTHDAY is Y/N's Birthday ( yeah three days apart because of the word "I Love You" ). So Jaemin and the Reader feels a little bit sad when the both of them are not together celebrating their birthday ( but they do facetime and message each other tho) and then they both decided to celebrate both of their birthday together after Jaemin's tour. After one month they finally reunited and celebrate both of their birthday together...

That's it Thank youuuu.....

Also I wanna say thank you for always taking my request and my last request is really good... I'm honestly so in-love with your writing babeee..

Make a wish 🕯️⟡‧₊ 𓂃 ࣪

Na Jaemin x Male Reader

August thirteenth came and went.

You knew hardships came with dating an idol. You’d deal with the hardships any day of the week when it came to Jaemin. This week however—it was different. His birthday fell on Sunday—the beginning of the week—while yours fell on that Wednesday. The middle of the week.

It was the first birthday the two of you were celebrating together as a couple—however you weren’t together physically. He still had a month left of his tour. While it didn’t bother you when they first announced it—or even as he was touring around the world for months on end—it was keeping you up at night. Wondering if you should even bother with calling him and doing something over the phone. It wouldn’t be the same but the sentiment was all that mattered.

So you settled for a FaceTime call on midnight.

“Happy birthday, Jaem.” You held out a cupcake in front of your camera, smiling from ear to ear when he blows on his speakers. You jump when the sound lands on your ears, adjusting the volume with the buttons so it wouldn’t startle you next time. “How is the city? Are you liking your hotel room? Do you miss me? Did I get the time zone right? Do you have your own hotel room?” You can hear his laugh through the screen and it melts your worries away—only for a second. You put the cupcake down, picking your phone up to sit more comfortably on Jaemin’s desk chair. “I wish you were here.”

“(Y/n) baby, you threw so much at me at once.” You watch as he licks his glossy lips—the faint mark of the birthday hat he put on earlier still visible on his smooth chin. “The city is nice, but you know I prefer to stay in instead of exploring. I wanted to spend my birthday with you however I could. The room is nice, I do have my own but it gets lonely. I hear creaky sounds and remember I don’t even have you to protect me anymore.” You tilt your head back, listening as he answers your questions, “I miss you so much. You got the timing down to a tee, it amazed me.”

The rest of the call is lost into the night. Before you know it you’re sending Jaemin off to bed so he gets enough sleep before his show. You know it’ll be a day full of short five-minute conversations in between rehearsals and sound checks and outfit adjustments—but for now you listen to him toss-and-turn in the white hotel sheets.

The days in between your birthday are blurred together. They come and go as you spend your days in Jaemin’s place. His home—now turned into yours momentarily as you feed his cats and keep food in the fridge enough for a small family. It’s domestic. It was as if you were sharing a home—only he wasn’t around.

He is the first one to wish you a happy birthday—first with a text and then with a call. He is squealing, a birthday card in hand and a slice of cheesecake in the other.

“I got all the members to sign your birthday card, (Y/n), some of the staff too. You know they like you, they’re always asking about you.” You can’t help but smile at him, the day old mascara on his lashes smudging onto his eyelids. You count the specks of glitter in his makeup, more focused on him than the words that come out of his mouth. “(Y/n/n). I’ve been thinking. We did celebrate our birthdays but I think we should celebrate our birthdays. You know? When I come back, we should do something. I was thinking of mailing your gift but I’d probably get back before the gift gets there anyway…” He trails off, putting the card and cheesecake down to pick his phone up, choosing to lie down and hold the phone as close as he could. “It’d be romantic. We can make a reservation to whatever restaurant you want.”

The rest of the month is long. It’s full of empty distractions. Staying home—in Jaemin’s home—was tearing you apart. You loved being around things that reminded you of Jaemin but this was different. These were his belongings. His cats, his furniture, his bed. It took missing him to another level.

So as soon as he got home you were on him. Bear hugging him before he could even close the door. You were grateful for his long hours at the gym when he picked you off the ground, leaving his suitcases forgotten by the door as he kicked it shut. Plans made for tonight were forgotten, kicked to the side as he carried you back to his room, kicking his shoes off with ease as he attacked you with kisses. It would be an embarrassing sight for anyone to witness. The way the two of you were taking each other in—even when he placed you on the bed. Slipping into more comfortable wear to get under the sheets.

“I’ve missed you so much but all I want to do is cuddle and sleep. Is that okay?” But you didn’t give Jaemin a verbal answer. All you had to do was invite him in with an open blanket and he knew. “Happy birthday, (Y/n/n).”

“Happy birthday, Nana.”

“(Y/n) we had plans. I have your gift in my suitcase but I feel like I could fall asleep here and now. I missed you so much, I’m sorry I missed your birthday.” Jaemin runs his hand on the back of your head, bringing you towards his chest. It’s soft, plump on your forehead when he pulls you into himself. “I brought you trinkets from every stop. Some are a little unconventional but they reminded me of you. It was so hard. Next time we tour you have to be there.” You let out a small hum, distracted by the way his breath hits the top of your head. The rise and fall of his chest when he slows his breathing. This was always an indication of him falling asleep.

This was better than any celebration planned.

#HIIIIIIIIIIII #hi Pook #thank you for always requesting #you’re everything to me #hehe #na jaemin #jaemin #nct #nct u #nct dream #jaemin x male reader #nct x male reader #nct u x male reader #nct dream x male reader #x male reader #male reader insert #IM SORRY ITS SO LATE #<3

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bullet-clubs-bitch · 6 days

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Birthday Blues

Chuck Taylor X fem reader Main Masterlist

Summary: With Best Friend’s spitting up Chuck finds himself alone on his birthday, or so he thinks.

An: You know I had to write a little something something for his special day

This morning I woke up with dozens of text messages from friends and family wishing me a happy birthday. But no matter how many texts I got they didn’t make up for the fact my ‘best friend’ didn’t wish me a happy birthday. Trent and I had been friends forever. We grew up in the industry together, we did everything together. He was my best friend! I don’t know what got into Trent recently but I didn’t like it. I didn’t understand the reason for his actions. Sure neither of us has held gold in quite some time but we should be happy for our friends. Kris and Orange were doing amazing things, we should be celebrating with them not wishing for their downfall.

It didn’t even feel like my birthday, all I wanted to do was rot in my hotel room. Last night Trent gave me an ultimatum. It was him or Orange. How could I pick between the two of them? Sure I’ve known Trent for longer and the two of us shared so much more but no way I would pick between my two best friends! I ignored all of Kris and Orange’s calls and texts. I didn’t want to talk to anyone, I wanted to be alone. I was never one for birthdays, I never felt worthy of the celebrations. Why should you all be celebrating me? I’m not special. I didn’t mind spending my birthday alone. In fact, I preferred it over spending it with my family. Every time I went back home everyone would ask about my dating life. Are you seeing anyone Chucky? When are you going to settle down? Your time is running up to have children, let me set you up with a nice girl Chuck. I wanted to pull my hair out at the comments.

I didn’t want to date anyone. I hadn’t been in love for a long time. Even when I was of course I fucked it all up. I was okay with being alone. Just as I was busy sulking in my hotel room I heard someone aggressively knocking on my door. I yelled at them to go away but instead, they began knocking even louder. I flung open the door ready to scream at whoever was on the other side but stopped right in my tracks when I saw who it was. It was Y/n. I hadn’t seen her in years.

“A little clementine told me you wanted to spend your birthday alone,” Said Y/n. As much as I was mad Orange somehow got my ex-girlfriend to pull me out of my depressive state I was also happy to see Y/n again. “Tell me Chuck, what’s got you so blue?” Y/n asked as she let herself into my hotel room. “I just don’t know what to do. How am I supposed to pick between my best friends? I don’t want to choose between them!” I confessed. “I know you are under a lot of stress right now Chuck. I get it, I do but that doesn’t mean you should spend your birthday feeling sorry for yourself. Birthdays are supposed to be fun! It’s the one day you can put yourself first and no one can say anything about it” Y/n had a point, all of this was making me look more pathetic. Trent said it himself, I was weak. “How about you and I go out for the day? We can do whatever you like Chuck. There are lots of things to do in the city! It’s your day to be spoiled!” Just before I could protest Y/n cut me off “Before you say anything yes Chuck you do deserve this. No Chuck, you are not pathetic. You have to stop being so hard on yourself Chucky, you deserve nothing but the best. I wish you could have seen that when we were together” Her words left a bitter-sweet taste in my mouth. As much as I appreciated her praise it reminded me of when the two of us used to date years ago. Y/n ended up breaking up with me due to my lack of self-confidence. I know that sounded stupid but it was a real thing. I was constantly shitting on myself, I was always so down. I’m sure that’s difficult to be around.

I ended up caving and took Y/n’s offer to spend the day celebrating myself. However, I didn’t expect her to say this. “We can do anything you want today Chuck, who knows maybe I’ll stay the night” Best birthday ever!

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chocoadepti · 9 months

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Nicola Drama CD Vol. 1 - Epilogo del 1927

This is an extremely rough translation, mainly mtl'd. Corrections more than welcome!!

That's a lot of people.

Forty thousand people...no, how many hundreds of thousands? It was a good thing I saved a hotel room. As I expected, I didn't want to join that crowd.

I had heard that New Year's Eve in New York is celebrated in Times Square rather than Trinity Church, but it was more than I expected.

The neon signs lit up the city more than usual, making it look white and shiny. It's so beautiful when you look down from a high place like this. But it's a shame that the night sky is so hazy, the beauty of the stars was better back in our hometown.

How is it, do you miss Burlone?

I don't think I'm the nostalgic type, but lately I've been thinking about that town a lot.

The street corner where I met you and the bar we used to go, the open-air restaurant in Veleno we passed by on a date, the shopping streets of Creta, and the Christmas Eve when we looked out over the square. ((Not quite sure about this part!))

I wonder why, there have been my share of bad times, but all I can remember are the good memories. And most of them are memories of you.

I hope one day, I don't know how many years or decades it will be, I'll have the chance to go back.

You see, for example, when passenger planes become stable enough to cross the Atlantic, it will be much easier and simpler to travel between America and Italy than it is now.

Ah, the Ball Drop. The countdown to the new year has begun. Less than a minute to 1928.

Yeah, this latest technology is pretty amazing. I heard they used a hundred bulbs in the Times Square Ball.

How do you like this kind of lively New Year's Eve? We haven't spent much time in church so far, but it's a good thing we went to the evening mass, so we were able to show our sincerity to God, right? ((Not sure about this part!!))

Here it seems to be the norm to do the ceremonies early and then have festivities at night with friends. I heard that New Year's Eve has become the mainstream, though I suppose it depends on the religious sect. ((Also not sure!!))

Oh, look, it's going to fall soon.

Five, Four, Three, Two, One

Here it comes. A new year has begun, 1928.

I'm glad to be here with you, my precious one, at this moment.

You're so cute too. I'm sure my wife will be just as cute next year and beyond.

I am glad that we were able to spend our first New Year's alone together after we got married.

After a few years, when it becomes normal for us to spend time together, it would be nice to invite not only family but also friends and have a party with everyone.

But that's a long way off. For now, I want to have you all to myself at least while we are newlyweds.

Eh, you also feel the same way?

Ah, I'm not doubting that you think so too, but you're being unusually honest, so I wondered what was wrong. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to question (??) you.

I was just happy and a little surprised.

I'm sorry.

Will you forgive me?

Grazie.

I think we've been out here too long, your cheeks are getting all cold. (??)

No, I'm not okay because you're so cold (??), so let's go back inside.

Come here, let's get you warmed up. I guess I'm colder than I thought too. It really does seem to get freezing cold in the winter here.

Yeah, I don't like the heat or the cold to begin with, but the reason I don't like winter is because it reminds me of so many things.

Ah, that's right, I've never talked about it with you. It was about 10 years ago now, I had spent winter in the Alps. I was stationed on the Italian Front.

I never regretted that choice. It was my own decision and I feel I did my duty. To paraphrase you, even if I could rewind time, I would make the same choice.

So many of my comrades died in that place, so many of them took up arms to protect their country, and many of them were broken by fear, crying to see their families and loved ones, but their tears soon froze and many of them died with regrets because they could do nothing about it. ((??))

Compared to them, I was very lucky. I could return to my hometown without losing anything. I still had two arms and both my legs were still connected.

It was good to return to my life (?), and the first thing I thought about was what to do with the rest of my life that I hadn't used up. But I didn't think too much about it. I knew what I wanted a long time ago, and I thought I would use my life for someone else.

I wanted to die protecting someone or something, just like my comrades.

It's not that I wanted to die, it's just that I've long since forgotten how strongly I wanted to not die. I'm willing to die to achieve my goals, and I've always been okay with that.

I'm sorry to tell you this, but listen, it's not like that anymore.

I'm Mafia, and I'm always in danger. The more power my Family gains, the more people will try to kill us. There are so many mafiosos in this city, and they are always looking for opportunities to take down other organizations.

We have left Burlone and arrived in New York, but I am sure that tough times will continue to occur.

Still, I won't die. No matter what, I won't die and leave you alone under any circumstances, I swear to God.

Ah, but it doesn't sound very credible for me to swear to God after what I did, does it?

Then, I'll swear to you, who is more important than God.

I will survive, even if I have to slurp up muddy water. Definitely.

I have lived my whole life for someone else. For my mother, for my country, for Dante, for my Family. I was told to do so, or I was forced to do so, and I thought it was my role to do so.

Now, I understand. Just like Dante, I was also bound to my blood for so long.

But now I'm free. You broke my cage, and now I just honestly want to be with you, to do this not because of someone else, but from my own desire. This is my wish, and no one else's. I want to live for my own sake, to make my own wish come true. I'm sorry that I couldn't say that I'll live for you. I'm being selfish and doing what I want for myself. (?? I'm not very sure about this part!))

Eh, you're saying that it's only natural? That I'm not being selfish.

That's why I fell in love with you/That's why I'm crazy about you. (Two different interpretations here lol)

I love you, my precious. Thank you.

If you were to live for me, then of course I'd be happy. But, if you were to live for yourself, and then you want to be with me, and stay by my side, then I'll be more than happy.

That's right, Signorina, how do you want to spend your first day of the year? If you want to get up early and go out, then you may need to go to bed. Or do you want to stay up late until the sun rises? Of course, if you want to chat then I'm also welcome to that.

We can talk while lounging in bed, but there may not be much of a conversation. Ah, I'm not trying to distract you, but, you see, I know myself pretty well.

Well, why don't we sit on the couch and chat, then that way I'm sure I won't disregard your wishes.

How about I make you something warm? Like hot milk?

Just like that night we met, I took your shaking hand and tucked you in. I was hoping to get you to let your guard down and maybe even fall in love with me, but I never thought that I would be the one to fall. I thought I had prepared for that quite carefully.

You see, Sister Sophia came to the house the next day and asked me to take care of you here, right? Actually, I had arranged that in advance.

You were very surprised at that time, weren't you? You never would have thought that and experienced and serious Sister would ask such a favor from the Mafia.

I told her in advance that it was necessary for your safety. I though that she(you?) would be hesitant to do so, and more than anything, I thought she(you?) would be scared. I asked her to make it a proposal from the Sisters.

I was planning a lot of things like this without you seeing it.

Well, I was betrayed by my own heart, which should have been the easiest to control.

All right, sit back and wait for me to make it soon. Ah, you're going to follow me? You're being more honest and sweet tonight than usual. How cute. How about we skip talking and go to bed instead?

I'm joking, I'm joking!

But we can't stay awake forever, so we'll go to bed sooner or later, right? If you're sleepy then, I'll caress your cheek and thank you for being my wife, kiss you softly and go to sleep with you. But if we go to bed and your eyes are still wide open and you're still acting sweet like this, then I'll live up to your expectations. It's ok to sleep in until afternoon tomorrow, after all there's no butler here to get mad at me.

My hot milk is a recipe that Giulia taught me. I heat it slowly over low heat like this. The trick is to keep stirring without boiling.

Can you pass me the mugs? Grazie.

Honey and cinnamon are the finishing touches.

Here you go, Signorina, be careful not to burn your tongue.

Maybe a bit too sweet. I'm glad you like it, your smile is the best reward of all.

Do you remember when I said it was enough for me to have a lovely wife at home?

That was my true feeling at the time. You didn't need to go out, do housework, or work, I just wanted you to be at home waiting for me to come home. I didn't want anything more than that, I was satisfied just by your presence.

But things are a little different now.

I want to have you all to myself, but I don't want to lock you away.

The woman I fell in love with is probably not the type of person who likes to stay at home, and even if she says she doesn't have to do anything, she should find something she can do and make an effort. (??)

I like that about you.

I want you to live your life the way you do.

Of course, if you want to stay at home all the time, that's fine. Even if you are just lounging in bed every day, my love for you will not change. But if you want to cook, or clean, or whatever else, then I'll convince Bartolo. He's a bit of a pain, but I can handle it.

Just because you're my wife doesn't mean you have to subject yourself to the rules that impose obligations or don't give rights. (??)

That's a bad tradition.

If you want to go out and find something you want to do and work hard to make it happen, then I'll support you. Of course I have my concerns, because I think it's best for you to stay home so you're not involved in anything dangerous or put in harm's way.

And I know that starting something new can be exhausting, painful, and hurtful.

I used to want to keep you away from all that, but that's my own ego, and if I really love you, then I shouldn't blindfold you, right?

I want you to see the world with your own eyes./ I must allow you to see the world with your own eyes. ((?? Unsure if this one too))

I've grown up a bit in the past year to be able to think this way, don't you think?

If you start something new and still have a hard time, then I will comfort you a lot. I will encourage you until you feel better and help you until the problem is solved. And afterwards I'll make you something like this, hot milk or whatever you like, hold you close until the tears stop, and go to sleep with you.

Then when morning comes, the two of us can work together again.

Instead of leaning on one person, let's take each other's hand and live together forever, supporting each other even when trials sometimes come our way.

You have always faced me with sincerity.

I will look straight back at you and respond to that that sincerity with my own.

Hey, my precious, I believe in your heart and mind.

So can you believe in me too? There is no room for hypocrisy in my feelings for you.

I will always be with you this year, next year, and no matter how many years pass, I will protect you no matter what happens.

I will continue to love you the best I can.

So don't ever leave me.

Please love me.

#piofiore #piofiore translation #drama cd translation #nicola francesca

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mitamicah · 1 month

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Two days ago I arrived home from the last of the See You Soon tour dates I will be attending and wow it was such a ride I have been pretty much walking in and out of existence and longingly daydreaming all day. So here’s my experience at the different gigs.

Tldr; Helsinki one was me in the seats – cozy first concert and bit of warmup for both me and the band – and Hojan!!; Helsinki two had much more energy and good vibes yet strict security made it so a few people had to almost faint before we got offered water… also I missed Jere by one and a half hours; Malmö was the one were I kept winning and I am still in awe this day even happened; Gothenburg was great especially for interactions between the members of the band although I wasn’t keen on the queue location.

Helsinki 1+2 I have decided to put these two together since they were at the same place and because I am very late to write this. I had seating tickets to the first show, so me and Anniina (@formulalakana) spend the day being käärijä city tourists in Vantaa. After that we went to Käbnb (I’d rented it for the weekend) and fanboyed some more over the apartment and wearing the bolero. Since the apartment was an hour away, we only just joined the queue right before opening of general entry at 5.50.

The show was great. If I am asked to describe it with one word, I’ll chose cozy which might seem like an odd word to use about a Joker Out show. In my defense I had been up since 4 am and had a whole day behind me of getting excited over käärijä stuff (also since I was staying at käbnb). I loved hearing the new songs (Sta Bih Ja and Bluza) live together with seeing Hojan join the encore. I was glad we got Metulji so we could use the cute little butterflies we got from people at the queue to hold up in the air (it was really quite pretty from the back). I remember thinking how Jan must’ve been warm in his furcoat on stage and that I appreciated the little hints back to Stozice with the outfits like Nace’s leg chain.

Tbh I mostly just took this gig as a warmup where I filmed lots of the songs and took in the vibe, now that I couldn’t really jump around myself. The guys might have needed time to get back into touring because I talked with some people yesterday that agreed that the band had been great if a little held back on the first day.

On the second day I joined the queue around 10.10. It was amazing meeting up with old and new faces. Everybody got so excited about being gifted stickers that I ran out a few hours before lining up for the queue started. In turn I got so many nice wristbands as well I think I managed to beat the record of most bracelets gifted to me in a day which had been Berlin previously.

Today’s vibe was completely different; there was way more energy from the stage and from the crowd, the latter possibly because I was in the pit this time, four rows from the stage. I had decided to wear my häärijä suit for the occasion together with a little Danish flag that I kept waving in the air. I was with a strong Nace girlie so we had placed ourselves by Nace and Jan. She got a few genuine smiles and nods from the bassist.

Katrina was a good opening song and while I haven’t listened much to Galaxy of Me/Behind Those Eyes/Schlager since hearing it live I remember enjoying it quite nicely. Padam was gorgeous as a piano ballad! Nace looked adorable in his glasses and holed blouse, and I enjoyed Kris’ outfit a lot. However the pit did get quite hot at one point so a few people around seemed to be feint and the security guards didn’t want to give us water until we directly cried out for help then they suddenly wanted to give us all the water we could muster. Other than that the experience was great! I felt my stomach drop hard at one point and I realized it was because Bojan’s eyes were locked with mine for solid five seconds. I loved that we got Kris bullied into singing NVGOT for the encore.

I felt almost as a celebrity when people complemented my häärijä cosplay (or Dojan as somebody later called me; the Danish Hojan). I even got asked for an autograph where I had to break it to them that I wasn’t the “real deal” yet they still wanted the autographs for the funsies.

After the concert a good portion of people collected outside by the tourbus and played Everybody’s Waiting over and over. I joined for a time yet felt ambivalent about it all given I could imagine how intimidating it must be for the band seeing such a big group of people standing around like this. Anniina suggested we catch the last bus home around 0.30 and I agreed it was probably for the best. The bus at the Pasilla station didn’t want to open its doors for me although I stood with my face more or less on the door window so I had to wait for another less convenient bus that left me gliding and sliding on ice home for 1,5 km. That together with learning the next day that had I waited one and a half hours more I could’ve met not only Bojan and Jan, but Jere soured my mood a bit I must admit. I bought myself the 3xl käärijä shirt that was offered as a nightgown and went to gift Jere his little gift (Helsinki sticker and Bojere keychain) but got lost so I had to hand in the letter at the Warner Bros Studios instead of the käärijä fanmail box – for this reason I am not sure if Jere will ever get it sadly.

All in all some great concerts although what I think I mostly will remember this trip for was the amount of käärijä related firsts that I got (first time seeing the mural, first time tasting oddly good, first time trying on the bolero, you name it) together with the joker out firsts as well (first concert, first time hearing the new songs etc. etc.)

Trinkets from the Helsinki shows including doodle from @ya-boi-joule , wrapping paper @formulalakana was so kind to buy and safe for me, merch and the many lovely bracelets and stickers :D Not shown here are the cool sparklative pin that @hazzybat made (and the cute kangaroo keychain I also got from Haz) together with the homemade Bojan earring I've basically worn nonstop since xD

Malmö I had thought about adding the two Sweden shows together but honestly the vibes were too different for me to do so.

I had gotten early entry to Malmö, so I had probably put way too much weight on making this gig the best of the bunch. For this reason, I woke up at 4 so I could be at the venue around 9. I was met by the oddest and most chill queue I have ever seen. By now point were we more than 15-20 people present before the line was formed at 5. I had been fairly certain that the only of my many goals (x) I would be able to accomplish would be gifting all my stickers away but spoilers; that didn’t happen.

At soundcheck I managed to get second row in the middle between Bojan and Kris (very strategic of me since two of my goals were related to Bojan and Kris respectfully). Having told quite a few people in the queue about my dream of getting Bojan to see my sign I had so many eyes on me cheering me on that I didn’t hesitate to throw my silly sign in the air. Bojan hesitated even less and agreed immediately (I might do another post about the whole experience with the tattoo when I have it done). In return I gave him the pencilcase full of gift and he looked at it confused until he read the little sign and said with a smile ‘gifts :D’. So that was two of the goals I had been so scared I wouldn’t in a million years be able to accomplish and the show hadn’t even started. When he later got down to slide his hand over ours I ended up being the awkward boy in the room going for a handshake (don’t know what I was thinking tbh) so instead Bojan held his hand in mind so gently for like a minute and locked eyes with me. Safe to say I was on cloud nine after that soundcheck.

The energy that had been great in Helsinki day 2 was somehow even better in Malmö! The band was fully on and so were we in the crowd. Jure wore what looked like a simplified Stozice shirt aka just a harness with a diamond down his chest. Kris and Bojan complimented each other, one wearing blue pants and the other a blue shirt and then the other way around with white shirt and white pants.

We started out strong with Sunny Side of London which I honestly hadn’t expected given I hadn’t heard it in Helsinki at all (and I haven’t looked too much into the setlist of the other dates). But that was not all: We got the demoni scream!! And NVGOT!! Padam was gorgeous as a piano ballad yet again. Me and Bojan held eye contact while screaming the bridge to Bluza together. So many different versions of Umazane Misli was sung including a version from both the people next to me that I had bonded with in the queue!! (that made me go into proud dad mode and gave me tons of dopamine seeing them win as well). We even got Bojan rapping the chorus himself from the middle of the crowd!! Fittingly he was given a crown by a fan immediately after. My last piece of Bojan eye contact came during Novi Val where I have on video him looking for five seconds at my phone and tapping his mic to his chest which threw me off for a bit rushing to make him a heart back.

Honestly this whole show was peak to me already before leaving the venue. Yet as I’d been the whole day, I was a man with a mission and now the mission was to gift away the last stickers. This quest let me to talk to Hearts, the supporting act (these guys were chill and cool as well) together with accidentally be close by when Kiki came out with two free setlists where I then ran to get one of them. What I remember most vividly was everybody I showed the setlist too being annoyed at ASTP being replaced by Sta Bih Jah and fair.

We were a small group of people that met up afterwards just to chill. At this point I didn’t even know where the tour bus was, so I didn’t expect to see the guys at all. Yet at some point one pointed out Jan walking by and me high on everything that had already happened had no shame and shouted ‘great concert :D’ at him where his response was a ‘thank you :D’ back.

It turned out that not 20 minutes later I spied Bojan in the corner of my eye down the hill where we were standing and wanting to thank him for the tattoo I went down there. I gave him a tight hug shaking a bit from everything and we ‘are you’ed each other for what felt like 30 seconds to a minute. He told me that he recognized me from Helsinki in the yellow suit and at that point I was ready to melt then and there. Bojan was just so easy and lovely to talk to I can see why Jere and so many others fall for him.

Going back up to the rest of the folk we noticed Jan and Kris hanging out, but Kris had to go when I got there. Nace stayed and we got a long talk about his turtles which meant lots of new turtle lore. I loved feeling how great of a turtle dad he is from the way he was talking about them, and I felt connected to him in the way he too speaks a lot with his hands. After Nace Jan turned up to speak to us yet I had a bit of a harder time talking to him maybe because we both can be a bit distracted (me mostly by Jure standing in a colourful sweater and smoking by the tour bus). He agreed to us taking turns taking pictures and getting hugs which was nice.

On my way home from the venue I had to record all my experiences which turned into me babbling only semi sensical at a camera for almost 3 minutes letting my legs show me the way home. I was surprised to find I didn’t get lost. I was not at all surprised to see I was close to tears in the video footage.

Trinkets from Malmö including my sign and Bojan's handwriting, the setlist and more <3

Gothenburg I only arrived at 2 o’clock for the queue given the bus I’d been able to get from Malmö. It was a bit colder than yesterday and the queuing space way less cozy being a parking lot with the bus behind a caged fence and us just outside the fence compared to the nice little park with the tourbus out of sight in Malmö. I did manage to get a wave from a person I am pretty sure was Bojan (my stomach dropped like it did in Helsinki as well so I guess this is how I recognize Bojan from now on xD).

I began doodle a bit for people and getting back into the queue vibe when I noticed the time; I had to go throw my stuff at the hotel, so I had a place to sleep and because the venue had a bag ban. I managed to get lost and curse myself for not paying extra for a closer hotel when walking around the construction heavy central station. It turned out the hotel I’d booked was a boat which I find cool (and fitting given the whole titanic thing with Bojere).

Being lost I ended up going on a tiny side quest to ICA and buy the käärijä youghurt. It tasted pretty okay (I ate it in the queue later)! I prefer dreamy lemon tho (my breakfast in Helsinki). I arrived in the nick of time because just 20 minutes later the lines were formed. Now being forced to stand close to the fence we managed to catch glimpses of the fan running back and forth (especially Jure) but none of us said anything. One person I was with told me about Jure being cornered by a fan and forced to flee into the tourbus only to be followed and to be honest that story was the cherry on cake for me; the rest of the night I found myself being in overempathetic mode to the point of later masking and stepping away when being afraid of invading somebody’s space.

The concert was great especially when it comes to gifts given to the guys and the interactions between the guys as well. I especially loved Jance’s dance during Umazane Misli (that today were mostly Swedish versions) and Bojan gently caressing Kris’ cheek to get his attention. Jure also got some action going on with the two guitarists joining in on both sides of the drumset and Bojan vibing when Bluza was playing. I really enjoyed Kris and Jan in yellow especially Kris with blondes down his arms. Everybody got tons of sunglasses, Jan got a Teletubbies hairband, Kris a crown (he threw off real fast after just one song) and Jure got a few bracelets he gently took from the hands of the people in the crowd during Novi Val (that was the one time he seemed to get eye contact with us at all – I still felt very bad).

The setlist wasn’t too different from Malmö but with Gola replacing SSOL (nice full circle moment for me since Gola also opened my first ever JO show and the first on the whole tour aka Helsinki 1), Metulji replacing Padam, NVGOT being skipped, and Katrina moved up the setlist (maybe there were more changes but that is what I recall). I seemed to have tons of eye contact yet again with the Bojan even more than the other three days combined. And that was despite being a bit farther away this time almost at the edge by Kris yet pretty close to the barricade (third row) all things considered. Once again, he gently held my hand. This time it happened during the show where he let his hand jump over a (tiny) sea of other hands to rest his in mind and he winked at me. I had to happy stim after that which is oddly not something I do a lot at shows. When Mira next to me was invited to do her choreography for UM on stage I got another rush of dopamine (Idk why I get these proud father feelings for people I’ve only just meant; I was just so happy for her).

We were a group that hung out by the venue afterwards; it was bigger than Malmö but smaller than Helsinki 2. Still big enough that my overly sensitive empathy today felt bad for being there. At the same time, I wanted to cool my nerves down after being boosted with all that dopamine. As time went on I also grew stubborn and didn’t want to repeat Helsinki 2 where I had moved home too early.

When it looked like we’d only wave at the bus today, Nace came out to the cage to say hi. At first, he seemed uncomfortable especially with how he tensed up laughing. He loosened up seeing the amazing Joker Out inspired jackets some fans had made and almost gave them both a heart attack asking for pictures of the jackets.

After that he came out to us on the other side of the fence, and we talked about the silliest topics like what signature picture pose each member have (sadly I forgot to ask about Nace’s own go to pose). I gave him a very rushed doodle of himself doing Jan’s pose (I had cold hands and wouldn’t risk him going away) and he got so genuinely excited for it my heart melted a bit.

Jan also joined yet only after Nace had gone and just before me and some others were on our way home, so we sneaked back again to chat. He was wearing his scarf as a hat so of course I had to draw and gift him a doodle like that. He too seemed genuinely happy for it. We gushed about the new songs and spread the ‘come to Denmark’ propaganda (we were two danes amongst others). Today I felt it was easier to talk to Jan. He was very nice and polite and open. We went away after Jan had said goodnight so I don’t know if any other of the guys came out to say hello. I couldn’t argue with my sense of being the crazy fan stepping over an invisible line anymore (even after dad Nace had told me that – like yesterday – he would not chose to come out and say hi if he felt uncomfortable so I shouldn’t worry … right before then saying the most people-pleaser thing like ‘I felt bad for you waiting in the cold’ so I don’t know how to interpret the two messages I got there. I guess Nace is right tho; he himself knows best what he is comfortable with and after all we were all nice and respectful).

Trinkets including the tour shirt (finally got it after three attempts) and the k youghurt

Fun fact about the blue flower bracelet: It was thrown to me by a crew member after Hearts' set - I didn't know what he had but I nodded to him when he asked with his eyes if somebody wanted the thing and so I was pleasantly surprised to see how pretty a bracelet it is. I have no idea who it was originally meant for x'D

#this turned loooooong OVO #should I have made it into three seperate posts? probably #did I do it - no x'D #so I don't mind if you don't end up reading it :'D #I will look through the pictures tomorrow hopefully so I can share more from gothenburg and the pictures of me with the boys :D #micahs thoughts #micahs foolery #my gig #helsinki hoc 1 #helsinki hoc 2 #malmö gig #gothenburg gig #göteborg gig #jo see you soon tour 2024 #joker out spring tour 2024 #sys tour 2024

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