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#this is just a little sample of things that I thought might be good to start with
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Hrmm... Revising my game and I feel like there's still sooo much writing left to do, for something that probably won't even amount to much, so.. I do want to narrow my focus more (especially given my health problems seeming to get worse/less energy the past few years), but I'm not sure how would be best to...
I currently have 5 characters as the Main ones with full planned questlines and such, with each character having 6 quests you can do for them. But I haven't really started the writing for the 5th main character. So then I was thinking, if I were going to write 6 full quests worth of content anyway... is it better to allocate that time on just doing a Complete 6 Quests for ONE single character, OR would it be better to do something like.. choose THREE side characters and do 2 quests for each of them? So that people have a wider variety to interact with and sort of sample around (of course with the idea that, once the first version of the game is released, IF people actually care about it enough to make it worth the effort, I would then add additional content to complete those 3 characters stories as well)
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SO... If you were playing an interactive fiction sort of game centered around talking to & doing quests for a cast of characters (like there's no larger plot, more it's just about interacting with people, every character kind of has a self contained story, the focus is just learning about them and the world and exploring the area) --- Which would you rather have?
(and of course it would be stated up front which characters have only partial questlines, so people don't expect them to have full quests like the others and then get disappointed, or etc. etc.)
Basically, is it better to just focus in specifically on having one fully complete questline? Or for there to be a few stories that are not complete yet, but have more initial options available?
#I guess I just feel weird about investing too much into characters if possibly nobody will like them. so the idea of being able to sample#around a wider variety opens up the option of like 'hey even if neither of these 4 are your favorite - you have 3 other options soon too!'#or whatever. BUT I also am very anti-the trend of releasing half finished games or shit like that where people preorder and then#the game sucks on actual release and isn't fully playable or good until 5 updates later#HOWEVER.. those are giant companies with hundreds of employees and millions in funding. I feel like it's different for someone#if they're just like ''hey I am getting zero money for this and doing it entirely on my own in my free time and before I do like 50+ hours#of work on top of the 100+ hours of work that I already did - I would like maybe to at least see some proof#people are interested in this - so I'm releasing the game with like a small amount of the originally intended content removed#that I still have planned out and hope to add later and the game is still entirely done and completely functional#except for just a few quests I might add later.. sorry'' etc. etc. ??? like I think that's different. but maybe some people dont see#it that way and would still be like 'grrr.. how dare there be unfinished options..>:V" idk#And the nature of the quests is such that it's not weird to have it be partial like.. again.there's no major plot. it's not like the quests#are leading up to some dramatic thing and having them half done would make it feel like a cliffhanger. It's meant to be very casual just#chilling and doing little tasks and such. And last thing to clarify I guess - by 'side character' I don't mean taking some unimportant bac#ground character and forcing them to have quests. I mean like.. originally the game had 8 full characters and I thought that was#too much so I cut it down to 5. So I still had everything planned for all the side characters too. Id' just be like.. re-giving them#quests and focuses that were already planned from the beginning but that I got rid of.. former main characters banished to the side lol..#ANYWAY... hrmm... hard to decide... It's just so niche I think. I feel more and more like I should just get it to a 'proof#of concept' state and get it out there to interest check rather than invest in it soooo much for nothing. Because I really do not have the#tastes other people do or interact with games or have interest in things in the same way. A lot of the stuff that I love (slow. character#focused things with basicaly no action or plot where its' just about getting to explore a world and learn about#people in a casual low stakes setting but ALSO not romance) I think people find very boring so... lol...#This year as I try to pick the project back up again after abandoning it for like 3 years I keep looking at stuff and going.. ough...#yeah... cut this maybe.. I should cut that too.. I should make them a side character.. remove this.. blah blah..#Though I did ADD a journal and inventory system and other things that like People Expect Games To Have so.. maybe#that will count for something.. hey..you can collect items.. it's not just 'talking to elves for 600 hours simulator'.. are you#entertained yet? lol.... When I was making my other tiny game for that pet website and I gave it to the play testers and someone was like#''it should have achievements so I feel I'm working towards something concrete'' I was literally so blindsided like..??... people WANT that#in games..? is the goal not simply to wander aimlessly &fixate on world/character lore& make your own silly pointless personal goals? I did#do them though because it IS fun to make up little achievement names and such but.. i fear i am out of touch so bad lol..
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cool-as-steel · 1 year
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ahoy! do you happen to have any fic recs? for the original TI book that is
why yes, I do! (arranged in publication order, for lack of any better way of offering them)
A Man of Substance by the_alchemist (John Silver/Mrs. Silver, G) - based in the small but intriguing mentions of Silver's marriage that we get in canon, this story imagines how that might have come about.
Middle Watch by Verecunda (Livesey/Trelawney, G) - imagining up a missing scene on the island in brilliantly RLS-reminiscent style.
A Most Ardent Suit by George_Sand_II (Livesey/Trelawney, G) - a continuation of the previous fic, a collection of very well-drawn scenes of eighteenth century courtship.
oh, you're my place to go by soundsandsweetairs (Livesey/Trelawney, G) - struggle, stress, and a little bit of sweetness aboard ship.
keep your fires bright by chiroptera_in_the_cupola (G) - something to be said about stories and the men who tell them.
threads are coming loose by chiroptera_in_the_cupola (Livesey & Smollett, G) - an immediately post-canon character study of the captain and the doctor.
and we march on, hand in hand by harpernovakaine (Livesey/Trelawney, T) - a bit of both past and future for the doctor, and a fantastic portrait of the relationship in between.
make my bed where the bodies lie by chiroptera_in_the_cupola (T) - a post-canon check-in with the marooned mutineers! they are not doing very well!
and then, if you'd like to go really classic, there's always The Persons of the Tale, a little metanarrativical story written by Robert Louis Stevenson himself! this is not precisely fic, but it's definitely one of my go-to recommendations for anyone who's interested in the book!
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So I guess it’s time for me to advertise to the entire neighborhood how insufferably neurodivergent I am by blaring a very specific playlist on a portable speaker while I ride my bike around the neighborhood, wearing very specific clothes — holding my hands, face, and posture in a very specific way — and pray to Satan (not really… I’m agnostic just like someone else, unironically) they understand what I’m trying to tell them with the music, and make the connection between the name I’m alluding to and exactly what that name means, and put two and two together that the name will happen to them if they take any pamphlets from my father seriously and decide to convert to the path of “everlasting life on a paradise earth” ahahAhAHAHAHA I AM MAD SCIENTIST! (sunuvabitch)
#I mean I have to get my exercise in anyway; might as well make the most of it before I move out right?#Yes I am going to great lengths to make a pun out of the name of someone I respect with my whole being. [sobs] It’S fOr a goOd cAusE#I’ve had this idea forever but I’ve just put the playlist together today after a few months of having this little speaker I got from Ollie’#I already knew what songs I wanted; I compiled them today#Will this even work? Am I wasting my time? Will the references even be obvious#My goal is not to make the reference right away; my goal is to put enough songs that people know that relate to [you can fucking guess]#so that when they hear it; they’ll maybe think about it and want to listen to it again — two of which will likely lead to a music video#if they go on YouTube for music (fingers crossed) — and they’ll get smacked in the face with exactly who I’m trying to reference#I omitted the third song which uses an audio sample of said person’s voice because I don’t know how recognizable it is#The song; obviously I’m not talking about the voice#I wonder if I should include songs from an artist with the same name and hope for people to make that cross reference#hm… that’s a thought#Otherwise I’m picking songs that are instant earworms that have lots of repeating phrases which make it easy to look up#if it gets stuck in their head and they want to look it up#and I just like all of these songs too#I’m a little witchy too so if putting your intentions out there is a thing; I’m putting my intentions out there#my vibes if you will#I prioritize secular practicality over metaphysics though#Others are songs that “sound” a certain way#Others have lyrics that fit perfectly#Some are ripped straight from the OSTs of various movies or are albums released by the people who made the OSTs 👀
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thewulf · 10 months
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With My Life || Aaron Hotchner
Summary: Request - Hotch x Bau!reader where readers boyfriend turns out to be the unsub. Maybe like a case where the bau gets attacked and threatened personally and the unsub generally knows alot abt them... Read Rest Here
A/N: Inspo struck and I had to go! Hope you enjoy!
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Y/N
Word Count: 4.1k+
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You sat down at the conference room table in a rush, coffee in hand, with damp hair and all, “Sorry, sorry. The line at Starbucks was a little slow this morning.” Sitting down you looked quickly at the case file location before a male voice next to you brought your attention to him. A local case. Very interesting.
Derek peaked up from the case file with a sly grin on his face, “Priorities? Right Y/N?” He asked looking right at you looking at you with a devilish smirk. He always had to be the one making a comment.
Sticking your tongue out at him you wanted so desperately to flip him off, but your boss was staring right at the two of you, and you knew better. So, you just turned back to the case file mumbling, “Shut up.” Earning a snicker from the man to your side.
You didn’t see the soft smile he shot you, your eyes were glued to your next case reading all about it. You might not have noticed but half the team certainly did. It was the most obvious thing to them. Aaron adored you. Hardly ever yelled at you. Certainly, never reprimanded you. The team knew of your boss’s big obvious crush he had on you that you had yet to notice. He wasn’t even good at hiding it. Which was ironic because you were a good profiler. A damn good profiler. Maybe even a better agent as a whole. You just got it.
So, when an odd feeling ripped through your body as you read more and more details. It’s only when you got to the page full of victims your fears were confirmed. A page full of women who looked eerily familiar to you. You hadn’t even realized the groups eyes were trained right on you.
Derek nudged your side hearing your barely there gasp, “What is it, pretty girl?” He asked, the flirting had become second nature to you it only became concerning when he didn’t flirt with you.
You looked up suddenly so aware of every pair of eyes right on you. It would have been a damn miracle if you wouldn’t have blushed, “The victims, they uhm…” You cleared your throat before looking right up at Aaron, “They look like my sister.” You let out a nervous breath clenching your hands tightly.
Spencer looked over at you quickly, “Does she live here? Local?” He asked.
You nodded quickly, “Yeah. Just down the road from me.” You let out a shaky breath seeing how close all these girls lived to her.
A stark silence took over the group. Nobody knowing really what to say. It was unlikely that your sister had anything to do with it. Likely just an odd coincidence. She happened to look like the victim the unsub was after. It still made you horrifically nervous though. She was in danger. Never in your life would you have thought that.
“Interesting. Noted.” Spencer gave you a half smile before turning back to the group spouting off a few theories. Making sure none of them included your sister. Ever grateful you were for the boy genius you were.
This was weird. The whole thing was weird. Too close to home. Everything about it seemed oddly familiar too you. The routines of the unsub struck a nerve with you like none of the other ones had before. This case was different.
The unsub was speeding up at a rapid pace. Six months down to three down to one.  He was now down to two weeks between kills, on his fifth girl. The fifth girl that just unfortunately looked almost damn near identical to your very pretty sister. A fifth life that hung in the balance.
You were driving from the crime scene of the fourth victim dropping off some samples to the lab when Hotch called. You answered thinking nothing of it. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence for him to call. It was the easiest way for your team to communicate when out in the field. Especially when you as scattered as you were right now.
“Hey Hotch.” You hummed getting back into the SUV after dropping the samples off. The best part of local cases were the home beds and knowing where everything was. It was hard learning new places every week.
“Y/N. What do you know about these red beads. Second crime scene they’ve been found at. You mentioned something about it when we were back at the BAU?” He thought to call you when they found it. You’d seemed weirdly off by the whole thing. Especially when you read the detail about the beads. It couldn’t be. No, you refused to believe it.
“Red beads?” You repeated him. A chill ripped down your spine in realization, “With gold detailing?” You asked without him telling you. That sinking feeling you got from earlier on in the week coming back. Could it be your boyfriend, Nick? The guy you’d been seeing for the last two years of your life?
“Yes, little veins of gold.” He confirmed. That detail was left out of the crime scene notes. You shouldn’t have known that. Not without somebody telling you. But you knew because you bought him that bracelet not a year ago. He fell in love with it, so you bought it for him, as a gift. You loved doing little things like that for him.
“Nick.” You breathed out a pained cry realizing who was doing this. Your boyfriend? Your fucking boyfriend was murdering girls who looked like your sister for almost half a year, and you hadn’t even noticed. The vomit wanted to hurl out of your stomach as the sick realization crossed over you. The kisses, the cuddles, the sex was with somebody who did this to women. Yeah, it was far too much and the contents of your stomach were unfortunately winning the mind battle.
Hotch was still on the line when you pulled your SUV off to the side of the highway to let yourself puke. It was too much. Far too fucking much. Hurling the contents of your lunch up off the side of the highway was certainly not in your plans for the day. But here you were, hurling up the contents of your lunch thanks to Nick, your not so sweet boyfriend. A literal fucking murderer. Your hurled up nothing but you still fell ill. You felt disgusting. You shared a bed with a man who got off on hurting women? Insane. This whole thing was insane.
Hotch’s panicked yells from the inside of the SUV made you get the hell back up, “Agent Y/L/N, for the last time, are you alright? I’m calling an ambulance out if I don’t…” He sounded exasperated with the situation, desperate.
You cut him off abruptly letting out a panicked, “No, no Hotch I’m fine.” It was a blatant lie, but you didn’t need a fucking ambulance. Dramatic ass man that he was you didn’t need medical help.
He let out a gruntled, “What the hell was that Y/N?”
You certainly weren’t going to admit that you’d just puked, no, that was gross.
You looked behind you making sure you could get back on the highway, hightailing it for his parents’ house. You had a sinking feeling you knew exactly where these girls were being hidden, right under your damn nose.
Spit it out, Hotch was waiting, “The unsub. It’s Nick. My boyfriend. It’s him. He’s the one doing this.” Letting out a shaky sigh you bit your lip, hard, to bite back the tears. It’s like he wanted you to catch him. But why?
A sharp intake of air is all you heard from the other end of the line. You’d done it, you’d rendered Aaron Hotchner speechless. As wrong as it was a ghostly smile appeared on your lips. It was your turn to be the fucked up one of the group.
“How do you know?” He asked not quite believing you just yet. It seemed, too good to be true?
“The beads. I didn’t think anything of it at the last crime scene. But the same one showing up this time around? He has a bracelet with those same beads. I gave it to him. And…” You paused pretending you weren’t about to keep going.
“And?” He egged you on as you got closer to his parents home.
You let out a few ragged breaths. You felt manic now. Your life was beginning to crumble all around you, “I think..” Another breathe was needed before you continued. Hotch let you take your time, as desperate as he was for information, “I think he’d obsessed with my sister. I just, never saw it. Or I ignored it.” You admitted while continuing to look ahead.
Your heart was broken as you admitted it out loud. How you never put it together was beyond you. Had you really wasted years of your life with a psycho self-absorbed murderer that wanted your sister and not even you? If you had any contents left in your stomach they’d definitely be rising by now.
You spit out the address at him, they were ten minutes tops. But you were only three minutes away. You could do this. You were an agent first. Somebodies life was on the line. A family needed to be spared from the horrors it could be.
“Agent Y/L/N, stand down! Do you hear me?” Your boss yelled through the phone as you parked the SUV in the driveway like you had so many times before.
Your eyes darted back and forth between the entrance of the garage and the call you were on, “Yes Hotch, I hear you.” You wanted to dart out, but you had to follow orders, had to.
It was a painful wait. Silent with Hotchner on the other end. He wouldn’t hang up and he wouldn’t let you either. You were find waiting until you heard a pained yell coming from a female voice. You shook your head in horror. You were right. Fuck, you were right. This was certainly the beginning of the end now.
“Hotch!” You let out a whisper-yell.
“What?” he asked from the other end of the line in his usual stoic tone.
“I heard screaming, I have to go in.” You already threw the door open pulling your gun away from your hip.
“No! Stay back. Do not go in. Do you hear me?” His voice sounded firm but shaky. Was he nervous?
You wish you could’ve slapped some sense into him though, “Hotch! I’m here. She’s dying. Please.”
“No.” He nearly growled.
“Screw it.” You jumped out of the SUV running towards the screaming girls cries. You couldn’t help the guilt that was slowly consuming you alive. You couldn’t let a fifth girl die right under your nose. A complete and utter fucking failure you were.
“Agent Y/L/N!” You vaguely heard before you opened the door to the creepy ass basement you usually avoided at all costs.
Drawing your gun, you creaked down the steps of his parents garage’s basement. A place you’d long since thought abandoned. A perfect place to hide his victims away. You let out your last sigh before going completely quiet. A cry broke out and an angry yell followed. That didn’t sound like your Nick. Who was down there?
You made it to the door. You could do this. Breathe. Opening it slowly you cursed when the creakiness rang out. Should’ve thought of that.
“Who’s there?” Your boyfriends voice rang out.
Damn. It really was him. Go time. You walked through pointing your gun right at him. The last person you’d ever thought the gun would be drawn on, “Let her go Nick.” Your voice sounded surprisingly calm as you spoke.
He ran over to the poor girl who look like she’d been tortured for the last few days. He picked up a rusty knife holding the jagged blade to her throat. Your back straightened as your steadied your aim on his chest.
You held the gun steady in your hand as you held it up to him, your boyfriend, the supposed love of your life, “This is disgusting, Nick. Drop the knife.” Your hand wanted to shake so bad. Breathe in. Breathe out. Let the training kick in. Don’t think.
He let out a sick laugh bringing the knife closer to the poor girls neck, “You would never do it, my love. Not after all these precious years spent together.”
It was getting harder and harder to breathe. Had he really been doing this for almost a year? Targeting women that looked just like your sister because that’s who he wanted? Her?
“You don’t know me at all Nick.” A cold voice came from you. The voice that took over when you needed her too.
“Baby…” He grinned knowing just how to rile you up.
“Drop the knife, now.” You nearly growled stepping a bit closer. Your eyes were narrowed in on the knife pressed to the crying girls neck.
“Y/N…” He tried to press on. Whatever he was doing was working. He was getting under your damn skin. Where was the fucking team?
“I said, drop the knife.” You were so thankful your voice didn’t waver. God did it want to. Your heart was pounding so rapidly in your chest it felt like you’d just ran the damn D.C. Marathon moments prior though.
It happened so fast. You were trained better than this. But it was him. You were taken so off guard by the whole situation. It fucked with you so deeply. On another level. You were distracted.
You heard the sound before you felt the pain. Your instincts kicked in and you aimed for center mass. One shot. Two shots. Then three rang out before the pain in your lower abdomen took over. You clutched your stomach as your body caved in on itself. Your hand was warm, wet, and sticky. A bloody combination if you’ve ever known one. The fucker had shot you with his other hand snaked around the girls waist.
You dropped you gun kicking it away, just in case, before hobbling over to the shaking girl, “Are you alright?” You asked while clutching your stomach with one hand. While the other you untied her from the seemingly dead body behind her. The dead body of your murderous ass boyfriend.
Once she was freed you nodded to yourself seeing him laying there in a puddle in his own blood. How could this have happened? How did you miss it? He played you more flawlessly than even you could have imagined. Finessed for everything you thought you were.
A cry ripped from your throat as your body hit the floor. You scooted away from him so quick, with every ounce of energy you had left. The tears wouldn’t stop flowing as you waited. The girl had made her way upstairs, but you didn’t have the energy, not anymore. You didn’t know how long you’d been sitting there before a soft pair of hands grabbed your face bringing it from the drooped position it was in.
“Y/N. Are you hurt?” Aaron’s blurry face clouded your vision. You were hurt beyond imagine. How were you supposed to come back from this one? In one swift moment everything you’d been building had been leveled.
Blinking slowly, you nodded down to where your hands were grabbing at your side. Crimson red blood coated your hands as your tried keeping the wound closed with pressure, but you were coming up far too short.
He sucked in another breath before he threw your hands to the side pressing his much larger hands into your body with ease. A pained cry automatically seemed to rip right from your own throat as his hands pressed to stop the bleeding. He shouted for a medic to muffle your cries from your teammates who were clearing the room. They kept busy knowing Aaron had you under control. Seeing one of their own down was horrific enough. They had to finish the job and get out. You were in good hands with Aaron though, they knew that.
A wave of utter sadness washed over his face as he witnessed your state, “I know, I know, shh sweetheart. It’ll be over soon.” He held the pressure knowing it was crucial to your consciousness, but it hurt like hell. He knew all too well, being shot countless times before and all. The shock never seemed to get easier even if you knew what was coming.
You nodded biting back the tears that so desperately needed to fall. You felt like a pathetic little baby right now, how did people handle this so well? It felt like a fire was being lit within your insides. Aarons hands felt like the flint that kept starting the fire over and over again.
He called for a medic again before the pain was beginning to become too much for even the adrenaline to overcome. It felt like hell was burning inside you and your body wasn’t able to handle it for too much longer.
He cursed seeing your eyes opening and closing far too slowly for his liking, “Do you trust me?” He asked you squatting down, so he was level with your failing body.
“With my life Aaron Hotchner.” You answered honestly. Because you did. He loved you and you loved him. The same could be said for everybody on the team but the two of you were a bit different. Shared a deeper bond. Two twin flames that danced around each other so flawlessly every time they were around each other.
He nodded feeling his own heart pick up. The admission felt so authentic. So pure. Like you’d never told a lie before. He placed an arm beneath your knees and another behind your back, “This is going to hurt.”
You nodded quickly, “Okay. I trust you.” You assured him. Because you did. You trusted him with every fiber of your being. You’d known him for years. Loved him for the same amount of time. Fell in love with him not too long after Haley passed. You fell in love with the broken man who picked himself back up for his son, for his team, for you. The one who put everybody else in front of himself. The one who you wanted the most. It was Aaron Hotchner. It was always going to be him.
Without so much as another word he lifted you from the wall you were seated against. You bit you cheek stifling the cry that wanted to come out. He was right, it hurt like hell. Damn the sick man for getting one last thing on you before he died. Before you killed him. Damn. You killed your fucking boyfriend. Three shots and he no longer existed on this earth. The man you thought you were going to marry. Have kids with. Gone. In an instant.
He began to walk up the stairs. His eyes shuffling between your concentrated face and the stairs below him. He’d be damned to drop you now. He’d also be damned to let the woman he loved die in front of him. Not again. That was a promise he made to himself not long after Haley passed. That would never, ever happened again. Not in this lifetime.
He walked you right up and outside to the first ambulance he found. He watched as you answered their questions without going into too much detail. He watched as your mind was seemingly in another place. He never let go of your hand though. Giving it gentle squeezes as your voice caught in your throat. Hotch all but demanded to sit in the ambulance with you even though it was against protocol for them. Being in the FBI did have its privileges as he flashed his badge to the crew.
“Y/N.” He grabbed your hand again once the man was done hooking you up to the heart monitor.
Your eyes snapped back to this reality. Head turning to him you gave him a lazy smile, “Hotch.” Answering him you let the smile drop. You weren’t happy. Not in the slightest. But he always seemed to draw a smile right to your face. No matter the mood you were in.
“Are you okay?”
You nodded, giving him a silent answer.
He shook his head, “You don’t have to lie. Not with me.”
You looked down and away. So, fucking ashamed, “How did I miss it? How’d he do all that without me knowing?” You asked him. It’s all that was on your mind. How had you failed four girls? Ruined four families lives.
He shook his head again quickly, “You’re seriously blaming yourself for this?”
“Yeah. Fuck Hotch…” You couldn’t continue as the hot tears finally escaped. A sob spilled from your throat. Hotch earned an ugly glare from the medic as he told you that you needed to calm down.
“It’s okay sweetheart.” He squeezed your hand knowing he needed to draw your mind away, far away from where it was stuck, “It’s easy really. To hide it.”
“What?” You sniffled looking at him with a confused gaze.
He brushed away a few more straggling tears on your cheeks before answering, “To hide the whole thing from you. You’re gone all the time. It’d be so easy. Don’t beat yourself up. Please?” You’d never seen him so desperate, so needy for a conformation.
“You’re just saying that.” You could never accept it. You only would accept you distinct failure here.
“Afraid not. You’re one of my best agents. It’s a lot easier to hide things too once they’ve got your trust.” He laced his fingers in between yours instead of simply holding your hand.
A delightful chill ran up your arm at that. A spike to the heart rate monitor gave you away. Your worst nightmare was suddenly coming to life. With raised eyes your turned back to him almost afraid to see his reaction. He was amused. A big smile adorning his usual stony face. His smile erupted into laughter seeing your wide-eyes expression.
“Thank you Aaron Hotchner. For this. For everything. For believing in me.” You sighed, “And I’m sorry for disobeying your orders.”
He looked down unsure of what to say, “I’ll never condone it, but I understand it.” He gave your hand a squeeze before deciding to cross the line that he vowed to never cross. But you needed it. He could see the desperation in your eyes, “You have to know how much I love you, Y/N. Inside and out you are one of the best people I know. I would do anything, say anything, go anywhere to protect you. I love you so dearly. The team loves you. You are so much more than this. More than a man who targeted a gentle soul. Please, don’t carry this burden. Let me help you. I’m here. I’ll always be here.” He spilled it out on the table in front of you.
You watched him in awe as he let it all out there. It was almost too much to believe as you listened to his words, “You love me?” You asked.
He nodded with fervor, “Love you. Loved you. Will always love you.” He looked right into your eyes forgetting the two medics in the ambulance with them, “In love with you.”
The damn heart monitor went off signaling you registered his words even if your face was still in shock, “In love with me?”
“Is that so hard to believe?” He nodded his head wanting to be closer to you. It certainly wasn’t the place he imagined confessing his love to you, but time was of the essence. He couldn’t let you slip away like he’d let you before.
You nodded, “Yeah.” You answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
He smiled for the first time that night, “We can talk about it later, when you’re feeling better.”
You gave him the most skeptical look, “You hit your head or something Hotchner?” You laughed giving him an out.
He shook his head brushing a straggling hair away from your eye, “Do you trust me?” He asked, repeating his question from earlier.
“With my life, Mr. Hotchner.”
He laughed seeing you so playful again. It provided him with such a relief he couldn’t conceptualize until that smile crossed your face again, “Then trust me when I say this. I’m in love with you. I have been for a long time. We’re going to get you feeling better than we’re talking about this, alright?” He all but demanded.
“Sir, yes sir.”
He rolled his eyes with a smile on his face, “You’re going to be alright, Y/N.”
You looked over at him with a smile that felt so real, “I know. I’ll be just fine with you by my side.”
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lesinquietes · 6 months
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Summary: Dynamight can’t seem to focus on his duties with a pretty little thing like you taking your sweet time scoping the crime scene.
Adult!Bakugou x Forensic Detective!Reader
⚠️ fluff. violence.
l Next l
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You’re trying to gather a sample of blood for evidence and he’s standing behind you with his arms crossed, jabbing at his teeth with a little wooden pick. When he’s done his idle activity, he tosses the pick in the trash. At least he’s meticulous about keeping the crime scene uncontaminated… for the most part.
“You done yet, princess?”
You purse your lips. If this was the first handful of times he used the pet name, you might have corrected him. It’s clear, at this point, that he doesn’t care to respect your wishes, so you elect to ignore him. Unfortunately, he seems to have a chip on his shoulder.
“Hey. You hear me?”
And you ponder to yourself, who the fuck do you think you are? because never, in your four years of being a forensic detective, have you dealt with a hero who acted like this.
You snap your head around to glare at him. When he greets you with a cocky grin — a very made you look expression — you want nothing more than to throw the victim’s keys at his face. Dynamight. You heard he helped save the world from All For One’s return, years ago, when the world was abandoning hope. You don’t doubt that his involvement is true, but surely his personality should have matured since then.
“Do I look done to you?” You ask rhetorically, latex gloves strapped to your elbows and vibrant eyes hidden behind thick lenses. “It’s only been half an hour.”
Bakugou’s grin widens upon getting a good look at you. You think he’s going to laugh. He’s seems like one of those jock types that still bullies because he never grew out of it. Much to your surprise, he doesn’t do anything of the sort. Instead, he sighs and walks over to you.
Normally, you would tell him to back away from the scene, but the words of caution catch in your throat. His sharp auburn eyes are boring into yours. There’s a spark on amusement dancing in the depths of his irises, though it’s the other emotion that catches your attention: curiosity. Perhaps this blunt hero has some semblance of professional focus, after all.
“Exactly. Half an hour. We could’ve gotten this shit done in five minutes.”
You roll your eyes. Forget what you thought. He just wants to go home. Well, if that’s the case, you can put him to work.
“Make yourself useful and hold this device for me.”
You shove the item into his hand. He grasps it instinctively. You don’t hear any complaints.
While you swab for a solid sample of the victim’s blood, he waits idly next to you, silently studying your process. He observes your craft with respect, knowing heroes can’t do their jobs as well without your role. His younger self — who so visibly struggled with disobeying any form of authority — might have roofed the device after it was forced upon him. He’ll hold onto it for you. At least it looks like you’re being thorough with the case.
But as the sequence goes on, he finds his gaze drifting to your features. He’s immune to a lot of things, but not pretty women.
You catch him when you finish your task. He’s swift to glance away. Oblivious to his fascination, you smirk.
“Didn’t know you were interested in forensics.”
He snorts.
“I ain’t. I’m interested in you.”
And he doesn’t miss how you bite your lips to stop yourself from smiling.
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reverieblondie · 6 months
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Be Sweet to Me
Chapter 1
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Pairing: Miguel O’Hara X Fem!reader
Warnings: None for this chapter, but there will be eventual smut, Pining, and teasing. For now- Fluff and Miguel struggles with grumpiness and realizing his touched started, but he's just over worked. Alternating POVs
Summary: People say many things about you're co-worker, and sure he's not the most social but you won't give up being friends with him! Little do you know Miguel is juggling so much in his life, and getting used to you is proving to be more difficult than he thought.
A/N: I am so excited to be finally be making this series! The Alternating pov's is different than what I normal do, but I think it works best for this story! This is heavily influenced by the song Be Sweet by Japanese Breakfast. Unsure how many chapters this will be, so look out for updates! if you would like to be tagged please comment to let me know!
Word count: 3,447
Part 2
“Y/n, I need you to organize the samples and make sure that all the documents are in order before the meeting.” 
Giving a slight huff you stop your work, turning on your heels to face your coworker.
“Okay, but what's the magic word?” you playfully tease with the slightest hint of condensation. 
Turning his head you see the unenthused glare in his eyes despite them being shaded behind the round tinted glass. You're still not fully convinced he needs those things inside, some kind of light sensitivity he's explained once but you suspect he might just like the cool guy aesthetic it gives him. Though you wouldn’t blame him if that was truly the case, it does look kinda cool. 
Face scrunched in that way you have gotten used to seeing over these past few months since working here at Alchemax. Chiseled jaw clenched shut, his full lips pressed in that iconic frown, thick brown hair styled back to try and tame the unruly waves, and tall bulky figure that you used to be intimidated by, (okay, sometimes you still are) but you have slowly adjusted to your co-worker: Miguel O’Hara. 
He stared at you for a beat before turning back to his work without another word, his oh-so-subtle way of telling you to shut it and do as you're told. “Alright alright, I’ll get it done. Don’t have to tell me twice.” 
One thing you have learned about working with Miguel is he may not always speak with words so if you want to create an effective work area with him you have got to be good at reading his expressions. Working with a guy like Miguel had its challenges, for one his mood: he's not exactly the easiest to get along with, and people call him cold or cocky depending on the day.  
Then there was how busy he kept himself, always working on something, typing on screens, working with experiments, or tapping away at that clunky watch of his. Even on the days he’s not around due to him ‘working from home’ you can tell just by his face that he hadn’t given himself time to rest. What on earth could keep a man so busy? Well…you had an idea or two… 
Despite his grumpy demeanor you were determined to become friends with Miguel. It didn’t matter what others would tell you about him or how much he distanced himself, you saw the subtle glances, the repressing of smiles, the slight cracks in the shell, You two would become buddies you were sure of it. Maybe he just needed someone to show him the effort, to be sweet to him, then maybe he could lighten up and bring his walls down.  
Pulling out all the stops nothing was going to stop your attempts, you were always nice (even on days where that was particularly hard) Helping with things he didn’t ask of you, organizing and cleaning up behind him. Coffee was always a winner, you knew exactly how he liked it too, you kept making different attempts then stopped on the one where he wasn’t making a face while he took his first sip. -Success! 
Then there was the friendly encouragement, pats on the shoulder, and high fives. Sure he seemed hesitant to them at first but he slowly became used to them, baby steps. 
Every passing day was closer and closer to your friendship blossoming!
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Magic word…was she serious? Why should he say please? It's her job to listen to what he tells her and do what he says considering he’s worked here longer. Miguel keeps typing away at his computer, lamenting in his mind how his co-worker was quite the character. 
Miguel couldn’t deny that having a co-worker who was tasked to help him in all his research did help him out more than he would ever admit. Having to juggle the secret identity of Spider-Man, being the leader of the spider society protecting the multiverse, and having to keep his role as head geneticist in Alchemax. Everything could get taxing very quickly on him. Layla was a great AI assistant but she was limited, so having an actual person tagging along to help him with work was bearable, though…you were a bit exuberant and that was taking some getting used to. 
The jokes, the odd habits, your clumsiness, the smart remarks you mumbled under your breath, your overwhelming friendliness. All this he could begrudgingly handle, but the thing that was still overwhelming him was the touching! Sometimes it wasn’t even touching at all you would just be so close.
First noticing it when you would stand so close that he would accidentally bump into you, if he was looking at a sample you were leaning over him to watch. You had no spatial awareness, running into him, running into things! The first month of you working here you broke so many things by running into them he thought they would run out of beakers.
Then the friendly gestures started happening. Miguel was used to people keeping their distance, meeting his gruffness, but you…oh no…you must have seen it has some challenge! The encouraging words, patting of his shoulder, spontaneous high fives, squeezing past him in tight areas, adjusting his coat for him, dusting off crumbs from his chest! Your Friendly proximity made him tense, it was…new and different, and he didn’t know how to handle it.
Though it could be worse, you could be a completely useless idiot. To Miguel’s surprise you did have a brain in that head of yours, so the trade-off for actual decent help was some playfulness from you he would just deal. It’s not like he wasn’t used to playful coworkers, the spider society made sure of that. Still, you were different…and that blossoming tingling your touch would leave on him…it was…annoying.  
Miguel's eyes move over to you as he watches you begin the task of organizing the samples and getting everything prepared for the meeting. Begrudgingly he was tasked with having to explain the recent studies and developments the two of you had made. The meeting was honestly bullshit, he hated having to report to the chairman, but they liked to keep a thumb on Miguel, making sure he was still their best brain. In fact, you had offered to take over and run over the presentation for Miguel but they denied that, had to be him…bastards 
For a moment you turn your head and look towards Miguel meeting his eyes, you shoot him a thumbs up and a smile, that friendliness still shining through. With an annoyed huff, he turns away getting back to his work. Still adjusting…
The two of you worked diligently for a couple of hours, in silence of course, there was no time to get distracted with chatting when so much needed to be done. Rubbing his hands over his face he could feel a wave of extortion taking over him. Sleep was something he wasn’t getting regularly, there was just never enough time in the day so sacrifices must be made. 
Eyes growing heavy and vision slightly blurring he feels himself slipping, but he can’t, he won't. Then a shrill alarm begins to blare from Miguel's wrist snapping him back awake. Miguel is quick to place his hand over his watch and sneak out of the lab unnoticed, lucky for him you were too concentrated on your work to notice his absence. Checking the message on his watch, it is a local emergency, something he can handle in fifteen minutes tops. With a quick few cracks of his neck, he's leaving to save the city again. 
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Stretching feeling accomplished in yourself getting everything prepped single-handedly. Roaming your eyes around the lab you note the lack of bulk in the room. Huh, no Miguel? He must have done one of his disappearing acts again, probably just going to lunch without you. Invite yourself to lunch with him one time and now he doesn't even tell you when he's going. Matters on that guy, oh well, you might as well go get something before the meeting anyway. Coming to a stopping point you gather your things for a nice quick bite in the cafeteria. 
“I can’t see how you can work with him.” Ah, so much for a nice quick bite…
Sitting there trying to enjoy your lunch it’s the usual suspects who come to sit next to you, talking more at you and around you rather than to you. You can’t help but think that this annoying tinge you feel is what Miguel felt when he was ambushed by you. Though you couldn’t have been as annoying as these people. Complainy and gossipy types are not the best combos with your meal. 
Their subjects range from many topics like complaining about work, to failed experiments, personal problems, idol gossip, then it lands to the one directly aimed at you…Miguel. As soon as the question is asked you're looking up from your food to see all eyes on you. Chewing quickly and swallowing to ask your question. 
“I’m sorry what?” 
Sophia groans, “O’Hara, how can you work with him?” 
“Uh, well he does his thing, I do mine?” 
Julius chimes in “Isn’t he a total dick to you though?”
Cassidy is now giving her input to the topic, “Oh I can only imagine what you go through on the daily.” 
“Well ac-” trying to interject, you can’t even get a word in till you're being cut off by one of them.
“Yeah! Like I bet he is always bossing you around.”
“And probably insulting you in some way,” 
“One time he called my team brainless idiots because we messed up one small thing” -it was not a small thing, that took you and him an all-nighter to fix…
“That was-” you try again only to be cut off once more.
“Oh, and he is always being rude!” 
“God, how can you work with that monster!” 
With that last comment you had it, the noise wasn’t meant to be as forceful as it came out but they kept cutting you off and then bad-talking your research partner, you were fed up. Slamming your hands on the table with a hash slap, effectively silencing them, you rise from your seat grabbing your tray in the process. 
“If you have issues with him you should speak to him like he’s a person. He’s not some monster. Sure, he is not exactly social, but if this is how people talk about him behind his back it makes sense why he keeps his distance... I've lost my appetite, excuse me…” 
With that, your lunch break was over. 
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“Spider-Man!” 
“You saved us!” 
“He’s a hero!”
“But…he’s kinda a jerk…”
“Didn’t he punch an old lady before?”
“I thought she punched him?” 
Uhhgg…would anyone ever get that story right? Miguel is prying the last bus hostage off him as they cling tightly to him. The vulture from his dimension was up to his usual antics but he made quick work of him and was now cleaning up the shocking mess. Having to save the people from the bus was no big deal, it was the pushy reporters, camera lights flickering in his face and the clingy person keeping themselves pressed to him that was the pain to deal with. Taking deep breaths he’s trying to keep his cool, but he can feel himself threatening to boil over. 
How come he can’t just ever save people and leave? Why was there always this extra crap to deal with? Finally getting the person off and seeing that all of what he could do was done he's trying to get out of there, but people can be so pushy…
Questions, Comments, Flashing lights, Praise, Criticism…he couldn’t help but snap, 
“Get out of my way! Leave me alone! And for shock's sake, try to learn to protect yourselves!”  
The crowd was shocked by this sudden outburst, but this should have come as no surprise from the grouchy hero. Spider-Mans in other dimensions were always known for being friendly, witty, funny, and nice to all they saved, Miguel didn’t exactly follow this blueprint. Miguel didn’t exactly mean to sound rude, just being a hero gets exhausting and patience was something he needed to work on. 
Miguel hears the gasp and murmurs amongst themselves about how he’s a dick, a jerk, arrogant, blah, blah…
Rolling his eyes, hidden underneath his mask he couldn't help but think of how irrational these people could be, say one thing the public wasn’t fond of and they are at your throat. It’s all of a sudden no longer how he just saved a busload of people, or saved the city by defeating a villain; No, now it’s about how rude he was. 
“Jerk!” 
“Boo!” 
“I hate you Spider-man!” -great…this just makes everything so much better with this thankless job. 
Swing off before the police come to further irritate him. As he swings back to Alchemax he’s wrapped up in his thoughts. This hero thing was not easy…everything he did wasn’t right, not what people wanted…he was always messing up in some way…nothing was ever good enough, he had to stretch himself thinner and thinner, keeping everything together. The pressure is immense…
Getting back to Alchemax, he changes and tries to resume back to his work, the fight had successfully woken him up but now he’s starving. Eating like sleep has also become a thing he has had to cut for the sake of time, but something quick should be fine before he gets back to work.
Stopping by the cafeteria Miguel immediately spots you sat by Sophia, Julius, and Cassidy, not good company for you to keep. Well honestly anyone, they might catch their stupid. Making sure to be as unnoticed as possible last thing he needs is you trying to wave him over to your table. Coffee with a bagel is all he needs to grab so he can make his escape back to the lab. Grabbing a coffee that thankfully wasn't made by you, his sensitive ears can’t help but catch what's being said at your table. No surprise it’s about him. 
Listening in he is catching fragments of the conversation sipping his coffee trying his best to ignore the meaningless conversation, till a remark of him makes him pause at the threshold of the entryway. 
 “How can you work with that monster!”
Monster…huh…is that how people see him? Mutated, sure, grouchy, and tempestuous maybe, But a monster. A ping in his chest makes his hands tighten around the cup. Talons threatens to poke through but he resists. If they want to see him as a monster then so be it…he doesn't care…
Suddenly, a slam, followed by your familiar voice catches him by surprise,
“He’s not some monster. Sure, he is not exactly social, but if this is how people talk about him behind his back it makes sense why he keeps his distance”
“Not some monster…” Your words can’t be helped from echoing through his head. You sound so angry, you never sound angry. Looking over he sees your face furrowed in a glare. He didn’t think your face knew how to do that. Watching as you walk away in a haste away from the table he's leaving to his usual eating spot hidden away from others. 
Taking his shades off in the empty break room he dims the lights down as he sinks into one of the chairs. Finally getting even a moment of a break, even taking time to peacefully relax he finds he is unable to. Even sitting leaning back he still feels teased, irritated, stressed. Trying to shut his mind for even a moment, a second of a break he finds it to be an impossible task. But as he sits, his usual stresses fade to be replaced by your words. Miguel could have cared less about what those idiots had to say about him. The surprising thing was that you were defending him…not that he needed it… but it was…kind of you…
Taking a bite out of the bland bagel he groans to himself, annoyed. 
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It's almost time for the meeting and you're pacing outside the doors with everything ready to go, except you haven’t seen Miguel anywhere. Running behind is a thing you are not used to from him, he’s usually so timely but you haven’t seen him at all since he left for what you thought was lunch. Did he get caught up doing something else?
 Minutes tick by and you're growing more anxious by the second. Would he just not show up? It’s a possibility, but he would be putting both your asses on the line, though he didn’t have to worry much about that, they wouldn’t fire their best brain, but…you're a bit more expendable.
Before you can continue thinking about your ass being on the chopping block Miguel is rounding the corner adjusting his coat and walking in a casual strut. Looking at him as he approaches you notice his appearance looks a bit different. That shirt does seem a bit wrinkled and his tie is completely messed up from earlier. What has he been doing? Mid-day workout? Did he have an accident in the lab and have to go change? But the clothes are the same, just wrinkled.
Or was he doing something else… Thinking for a moment over what you could be doing that would cause messed up clothes an image of a sweaty grunting Miguel pops into your brain. Pushing down the thought with an internal slap to yourself you decide to greet him as friendly as possible. 
“You're running behind Miguel” -okay you can’t help but tease him a bit. Friends rass each other all the time. 
“Yeah, got…caught up in something…” he speaks hesitantly, suspicious…
Miguel gets ready to go inside but you quickly grab him by the shoulder to get his attention “Hold on there, you can’t go in there looking like that” 
Turning to face you, he looks at you confused then looks down at himself, “What? I look fine.” 
Scoffing, you roll your eyes and point to his chest where his tie is haphazardly knotted together in a rushed fashion.
“Your tie” Before he can protest your hands are already getting to work losing his tie gently, “Let me help you” 
With the silk tie undone hanging down his chest, you're moving your hands to raise his collar. As you concentrate on the task your eyes are fixed on his neck you observe that as your fingers slightly brush over his warm skin his body teases slightly. Straightening his neck, you know he’s about to say something.  
“Why are you nice to me? I know what others say about me, so how come? Are you trying to pity me?” His voice is stern and this isn’t what you were expecting out of him right now. Did he hear you earlier? 
The slight laugh that escapes you couldn’t be helped. Moving your hands you cross the two ends to tie in a classic Windsor knot. “Leave it to you to think someone being nice to you is just a ruse to pity you. I just want to be nice to you.” 
Remaining silent you continue to loop and twist the tie, your knuckles blushing over him, you swear you see his skin pickle up for a moment with a slight shiver. Finishing up, you tighten it to his neck and carefully fold his collar back down, keeping your eyes on your work at hand, you watch as his Adam's apple slightly bobs as you adjust it properly. 
Sliding your hands to the silk tie you brush your fingers down the soft fabric straightening it while laying down flat against his chest. The feeling of his chest tightness under your fingertips and his breath seems to be slightly slow, you don’t know if he is hating this or being relaxed by it. 
Meeting his eyes, they are unshaded for you to observe their burgundy hue. His face is still stern looking but you know this one has that slight softness in his eyes, meaning his listening, he is waiting for you to speak again. 
“I want us to be friends, simple” 
Miguel's lips slightly part as if he was about to speak, but before he could the conference room doors opened with them calling Miguel in. Turning to you there is a look on his face you're not completely used to, but that will have to wait for now. Giving a quick pat to his chest you smile up at him. 
“You got this Miguel, good luck.” 
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ravenna-reid · 2 months
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Admirer from the past...
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TW: blood, mention of dead bodies and stalking/obsessive behaviour
An expert crime fighter. One of the youngest CEOs. A skilled detective. As good as the Bat. Maybe even better than him.
Tim often found himself conversing with police officers and other detectives that were actually qualified unlike him. Discussing the crime scene, the criminal, the victim, and the next course of action. They all respected Tim and were willing to work together.
One night Tim found himself standing amongst the chaos of the press, the solemn faces of detectives and officers and a name written in blood covering the footpath along with other gory things... The crimson letters painting the cement were a confronting display.
It was the works of a new villain, one that had only just started doing such things two weeks ago. He was one of the most psychotic men Tim had ever dealt with. And it seemed he had a nasty obsession with some poor girl, given he was constantly leaving dead bodies and flowers strewn across Gotham City dedicated to her.
Honestly, the situation twisted Tim's stomach, making him all the more adamant on finding this fucked up guy in hopes of sparing his target the fear and trauma.
Tim kept to himself as he tried to analyse the scene, picking up clues and taking his own samples. That was until the screech of tires on the road caught his attention. Turning to look over his shoulder, he saw another well known detective pull up beside the crime scene and hastily get out of his car. And with him a woman. Tim quickly let his eyes glance over you. You wore a fitted suit, golden hoops and your hair thrown up into a french twist. Throwing your trench coat over your shoulders, you hurriedly followed the detective with an unimpressed look on your face.
"If you haven't even caught the assailant yet, why am I here Harry?" You asked before you fell into step with your co-worker and friend. He was almost like an older brother to you.
"Because, I need your input. Your analysis. This guy is a fucking nut and we have no idea how to predict what he's gonna do next."
Intelligence and class seemed to drip off of you, and Tim was immediately smitten interested in you. He even found himself wondering if you were seeing the man you had arrived with.
Surely not, he was old enough to be your father.
You and Harry ducked under the police tape, your hands in your pockets and eyes trained on the gruesome scene. Black roses coated in thick blood decorated the ground around your boots. You instantly grimaced.
Harry made his way over to the group and greeted Tim first.
"Red Robin." He said with a nod.
"Detective." Tim said back, eyes still trained on you.
You turned in a circle to take it all in before nearing the group. "So, do we have anything on this guy?"
"Red Robin managed to hack into one of the shops security systems. The one across the street. With the footage he retrieved, we can see this sick bastard commit the crime, but his face is obscured."
You were watching Red Robin as the officer spoke, a little taken aback to see a vigilante standing in front of you. Let alone one of the bats.
"Can I see the footage?" You asked, eyes gazing back at his.
Tim swallowed hard. Your eye contact was unwavering, and he could feel a blush begin to creep onto his face.
"Miss, are you even a detective or-"
"Of course." Tim cut the officer off, handing you the tablet that sat atop a police car.
"It's fine," Harry said with the wave of his hand, "She's with me. She knows what she's doing."
Tim watched you analyse the footage. The man was wearing a cap, and some sort of odd make-up was smeared across his face. It might have even be blood you thought. You attentively watched the criminals behaviour. His mannerisms. The odd tick in his left shoulder. The limp in his right leg.
"Anything?" Tim asked.
His voice was like wine and you couldn't help but breathe in his cologne. You might come along to see these crime scenes more often.
"There's something." You admit with the furrow of your brows. "The way he moves. I can't put my finger on it though..."
Tim observed the badge clipped to the collar of your shirt. Although he could read what your occupation was, your coat was covering your name.
"Forensic psychologist?"
What a stupid moment to be making small talk. He began to chastise himself and his lack of charisma, but you didn't seem to mind, much to his relief.
"Mhm. Know what that is?" You teased, anticipating the Red Robin's response.
Tim smirked. "No actually, never heard of it."
You gave a light laugh and Tim felt he had to keep the conversation going.
"Are you new at this?" He asked. "I haven't seen you before."
"Not really," you replied with a soft smile. "It's my second year."
"Yeah, and she beats everyone in the game." Harry called out with a chuckle. You tried to hide your blush, but your humility mixed with your attempt to hide your reaction made Tim like you even more.
But the longer you watched the footage it suddenly dawned on you. The puzzles snapped together in your head and left you a little shocked. Tim immediately took note of the change in your demeanour.
"What is it?"
You held onto the tablet tightly. "I think I know who this is. The twitch. The limp. The hunched form and what he's doing..."
"Holy shit..." Harry said as the others all gawked at the writing on the ground.
Tim ignored them, focusing his full attention onto you.
"Back when I was just a psychologist. This guy came to me, I'm sure of it." You looked back up at Tim now, but before either of you could say anything, Harry called your name.
"You better get over here."
You and Red Robin joined the group, and as you looked down at the name on the footpath, your soul immediately dropped down to your feet.
"What's wrong?" Tim asked, looking up at Harry then at you. But now that you had moved, the name on your badge was revealed to Tim.
Everyone suddenly turned to look at you. And all you could do was stare down at the red letters before you.
"That's my name."
Continue to Part Two here
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sorcerous-caress · 7 months
Note
Okay as great as crybaby!tav is we really glossed over the potential of mommy!Tav. I may be a smidge bias because that’s a lot like my tav, as she’s so damn determined to take care of her friends and was a baker before she was an adventurer so she’s constantly just doting on the companions offering them pastries. It’s a little self indulgent but My Tav has a little quirk that she grew up food insecure and just absolutely refuses to eat until she knows everyone else has eaten because she can’t bear the thought of any of her friends potentially going hungry. She’s normally very submissive and sweetly to all of them but no amount of begging, discipline or concern will break her because she just cares so damn much. Could you write the dom mom squad™️ reacting too something like that, who tries to comfort them? Who is incensed that she doesn’t believe they can provide? Who gets so hung up on the fact she’s being stubborn they forget the original issue?
A submissive mommy who can cook and give good hugs will literally fix 90% of the gang here, unironiclly.
Reacting to a very motherly Reader
[Bg3 women, fluff, dom mommies, afab!reader, fem pronouns, sub!reader ]
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Karlach would relish in your dotting.
During her life in the hells, she was both touch starved and food starved for so long. You being there to encourage her with the pep talks, headpats, and occasional pie is everything she has ever dreamed of and more.
As much as she wants to be the one to take care of you, she can't help but let relish in you fussing over her. The coddling, the comfort, and the constant attention are slowly frying her brain from how happy she is.
Did she die and go to heaven?
She becomes very protective of you, never lets you carry heavy stuff, and always asks if you need her to bring you ingredients or something during her errand runs. No, no, you don't have to tire your pretty little legs. Just stay in camp all sweet and pretty while she goes out and brings you everything you need.
If you didn't know any better, you'd think she's subconsciously treating you like her stay at home wife.
She really likes hovering around while you cook, watching you work attentively and sometimes begging for a sample taste with her puppy eyes.
And yes you being the one feeding her those samples is very important, it enhances the taste a lot.
It might take her a while to notice the fact that you were always the last one to eat. Or how you immediately offered your plate if someone else wanted seconds.
She thinks it's very sweet at first but slowly grows more and more concerned at your well-being.
I mean, if she had to, she would sit on your lap to prevent you from getting up as she hands you a plate of food. Your stern talk will just make her feel guilty and sad but she'd refuse to let you get up.
As much as she loves nothing more than to obey her mommy, sometimes she also needs to take care of her mommy like she takes care of her.
Minthara would admire your ways.
Tenderness and love were never words that anyone in her culture used to describe a mother, an ilhar. No, they tend to fall more on the brutal and disciplinary side.
An ilhar meant authority, control, and order. To defy her is to commit a sin. To show weakness in front of her is even worse.
She is reminded by that cultural difference whenever someone describes you as motherly.
The only thing you had in common with the matrons of the underdark was that underlying strength. That unbreakable will hidden so deep inside you, the urge to survive at any cost and defend your subordinates. She admired it greatly.
You were very strong deep down, strong to be truly worthy of the description of motherly. That kind of strength that the males will never understand, the kind of strength that nurtured even more strength.
So when a person like you showered her in hugs, kisses, and even brushed and styled her hair for her from time to time, how could she ever be ungrateful and say no?
You were generous and kind even when you had no need to be, you were selfless to a concerning degree.
She had to put a stop to that.
Minthara respects you too much to use any of the punishments or disciplinary ways that her matrons taught her. She will talk to you like an equal because that's what she sees you as.
She will be very patient with you. Stopping you when your self sacrifices become too much for your health to bear, Reminding you that you also require as much food and rest as the rest of them.
She'll teach you to relay on her slowly, as gentle as she possibly can be. Which...isn't very gentle, honestly, but she is genuinely trying her best.
Jaheira feels like you complete her.
As an actual mother to so many children, Jaheira still never truly grasped the whole motherly vibe people keep preaching about. Her kids are safe, fed, cleaned, and trained in combat. Isn't that enough?
So what it if she was absent on missions a lot, need I remind you that her line of work concers the safety of the whole world? What kind of mother would she be if she let the whole world, which included her kids, end just because she picked to stay at home and colour with her youngest.
She knows it doesn't excuse it. Give her a break. She is at the end of her age and hasn't had someone by her side since in a long while.
That's why when you suddenly appear in her life with all of the qualities she was severely lacking in, she almost thinks it's too good to be true.
...you almost remind her of a certain someone she lost long ago. You're just as soft and caring to others. Ironically enough people also underestimate a lot because of your kindness too.
She is drawn to you, like a moth to a flame.
Jaheira can't help it. You shine with radiance, and she hasn't felt warmth in so long.
The first few days she brings her kids home-cooked meals, they immediately hold a knife to her throat as they demand this doppelganger tell them where their real mother is.
But after some very awkward conversations, and having to bring you into her house as actual proof. They realised that their mother's stone heart can still beat after all apparently.
Shadowheart tries to play it cool, fails.
She has an edgy mysterious aura she needs to keep, and you're making it very hard for her. How is she supposed to be this dark, cool cleric of Shar when you keep gifting her these hand-knitted pastel sweaters with the most loving look in your eyes.
Of course she will wear them, she isn't heartless.
She's really trying not to show how touched she is when you look for her during dinner at camp to make sure she got her plate. She can't help the blush on her ears when you wipe some food from the corner of her mouth.
She's mean to people on your behalf when they're rude to you or try to take advantage of your submissiveness. Actually she is just mean to people in general if she doesn't like the way they look at you.
Loves taking naps on your lap, absolutely adores when you play with her hair or braid it. Your thighs are the perfect pillows for her to rest her head on and just forget about the outside world and her mission for a while.
She saves the best wine she finds to share it with you later, or the best sweets or fancy jucies if you don't drink. She had to defend her stash from both Gale and Wyll wandering hands, absolutely refusing all of their offers or begging for some of that fancy cheese or that perfectly aged wine bottle.
You're the only person she ever shares it with. She doesn't even want anything in return. She just loves seeing you happy and relaxed every once in a while. You always take care of them, so it's about time that someone takes care of you too.
Laezel has killed people for disrespecting you.
And she'll do it fucking again. These worms forgot their place. She doesn't even care how little their offence is, just efficiently ending their miserable life.
Why do you have a look of disappointment on your face? She did them a favour. She even made it painless and quick to compromise for your feelings.
Chk. Your softness will be the end of you. Be grateful that she is here to prevent that from ever happening.
You threaten not to take her with you on errand runs anymore if she doesn't put her sword away? You really think you can survive without her?
...okay yeah actually you can. You make a really valid point.
If it was anyone else she'd have taken that request as an insult on her honor, but since it's you...
Fine. She will listen for now.
And maybe if you keep making more of those faerun dishes, she will find it easier to listen to you. Especially the apple pie ones.
648 notes · View notes
shmaptainwrites · 4 months
Text
𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐄𝐘𝐄𝐒 [𝐉𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐒𝐎𝐍]
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PAIRINGS — James Wilson x fem!Reader
SUMMARY — James has a huge crush on his labmate, the only question is how long will it take him to ask her out? (Answer: it's longer than you think)
WARNINGS — cancer mentions, patient death from cancer, drugs, alcohol (don't be mistaken this fic is tooth-rotting fluff)
NOTE — Okay this fic has come up from my compulsory need to elaborate on anything Canadian so if you ever wanted to see James at McGill, this fic is most definitely for you! Also I guess it's indirectly mentioned that reader was raised in Quebec, but obviously doesn't have to be "Quebecois" for this to work
Pronounciation — Jian = Chyehn
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James chewed on the inside of his cheek as he walked up to the Stewart Biological Sciences Building on McGill campus. For some reason, it was so much more intimidating now that he was actually a student. During the tour he had his mother’s reassuring hand on his back, his father’s words of comfort that he would most definitely be accepted when he applied. 
Now that he had made it, he had to prove he belonged, but it could have been worse. His friends at Harvard and the University of Toronto had told him so. He was getting the best of both worlds, a prestigious school and, hopefully, not as much pressure as the rest of them. 
Without loitering any longer, he made his way inside and looked around to find the right lecture hall. It couldn’t possibly be that hard, could it?
After his first semester James had realized he’d made a few mistakes. One was living in a French speaking part of town without knowing a lick of the language, but that one was the easiest to deal with. The others were more in the realm of the amount of sleep he was getting and underestimating how much content the professors could shove down their throats in 14 weeks. 
He was more than happy to return to New Jersey for the holiday break to rest and recuperate before going back to the winter wonderland hell that was Montreal, but this time he was confident he would be more prepared. 
And for the most part, he was. He got enough sleep, partied responsibly (except Fridays, he partied hard then), always submitted his work on time and maintained his good GPA, making up for his poor fall semester. What he didn’t expect, however, was a distraction. 
When you walked into the room James watched you curiously, he thought maybe he’d seen you somewhere before, but he couldn’t quite place it. Besides, you were much more interesting than watching his sample boil for another five minutes. 
You came and took a seat next to him, taking out your safety goggles and lab notebook from your bag before shoving it under the table. 
“You’re sample’s boiling over,” you said, but James didn’t register you were talking to him at first, still looking at you in a slightly dazed manner before you physically pointed to the beaker, making his eyes go wide as he frantically turned down the heat and removed it. 
“It’s a wonder you passed the lab safely quiz,” you teased and James blushed. 
“Good thing I don’t want to be a chemist.” 
“Oh, and what do you want to be then?” you asked, preparing your own sample for boiling. 
“A doctor,” he shared with a little more confidence. 
“Any specialty in mind or just a doctor,” you said, doing air quotes over the word. 
“I’ve been shadowing some of the researchers in the Life Sciences Research Complex and I think oncology might be a good fit for me.” 
“Yeah, as long as you don’t have to boil cancer cells you should be fine,” you assured him. 
“What about you?” he rolled on the balls of his feet as he continued his experiment. “Or are you all talk?” 
“Pfft, you think I’d be here if I was all talk?” you asked. “No, I want to be a medical researcher.” 
“Maybe you should do some shadowing in the LSRC then.” 
“No thanks, I think I’ll stick to my job there.” 
“Your job?” James looked at your wish surprise. “Aren’t you like 18?” 
“Almost,” you smiled. 
“How did you manage to get a job there? They barely let undergraduates in the labs, let alone be responsible for anything.” 
“It’s nothing fancy,” you assured him. “I just do cataloguing for now, but it's a good experience.” 
“Still,” he raised his brows, “you must be like a prodigy or something.” 
“Again, no,” you shook your head. “Just someone who goes after what she wants.” 
There was a comfortable pause where you both took down your distillation set ups and began working on the filtration portion of the experiment. 
“So what’s your name, anyways?” you asked, looking over at him. “Hey, look, clamp it this way,” you demonstrated and he followed your lead, seeing how much more stable the glassware was afterwards. 
“Thanks,” he smiled. “I’m James.” 
You told him your name and continued your work again in silence.
Chemistry labs quickly became the favourite part of James’ week. 
Ever since that lab, James began to see you in all his classes. On more than a few occasions, he’d had to steal notes from his friends on account of forgetting to pay attention. It became an easy thing to tease him about, so his friends began calling him heart-eyes, because who was he kidding, he had a crush. 
“Get your head out of your ass, heart-eyes, I am not giving you my notes again,” his friend, Carlo, shoved his arm and whispered harshly as he could see him getting distracted. 
“Sorry,” James shook his head and began scribbling down what he had missed, his eyes darting back and forth from the board and back to you. 
“Why don’t you just ask her out?” Pierre asked him after class. “Don’t you talk all the time in the lab?” 
“More like I stare at her and she says stuff to make it not awkward,” he cringed at his own actions. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Every time I’m with her I can’t string together a sentence, and– Jesus Christ you should have seen my face last week! Full on red, like I can’t even be subtle about it!” 
“Yikes,” Jian grimaced. 
“It’s bad, I know,” James assured. 
“And this is why we call you heart-eyes,” Carlo patted James on the back. 
“Yeah, say it a little louder, maybe she’ll hear you,” James said sarcastically. 
“Who’ll hear you?” the group of boys heard a voice behind them and all their eyes went wide as they spun around and saw you. 
“No one!” Jian was quick to answer in the least nonchalant way possible, making the rest of the group, especially James, stare daggers at him. 
“It’s not no one,” Carlo attempted to save face. “Just… this girl back in uh New Jersey that James’ got the hots for,” he gained confidence with every word of the sentence before adorning a smug smile on his face and patting James yet again on the back. 
“You’re afraid a girl in New Jersey will hear you?” you looked curiously at James but he just stared blankly at you. “So you call him heart-eyes?” you instead turned your attention to his friends and they nodded. “That’s cute, maybe I’ll call you that too.” 
“Sure,” was all a red faced James could get out before you excused yourself to head over to work. 
Pierre was trying very hard to keep a straight face while you walked away and James slapped both Carlo and Jian upside the head. 
“What the hell was that! Could you not have been more obvious, Jian? And Carlo, a girl back in New Jersey? Now she thinks I’m pining for someone else!” 
“On the plus side, maybe she’ll think all your blushing around her is a circulation issue,” Pierre shrugged. 
“You guys are the worst,” James shook his head and shoved his hands in his pockets, continuing to walk along the path to one of the libraries. 
“No, we just saved your ass,” Carlo caught up with him. “However terribly, but if we didn’t say anything you would have stared at her with your mouth open like a trout.” 
“Carlo does have a point,” Jian agreed, “At least we bought you a little time to get your act together.” 
James sighed, “You guys have too much faith in me.”
“You said that when I started to teach you French and you’ve come a long way with that,” Pierre said. 
“Yeah, sure I went from saying nothing to being able to say Je m'appelle James et je ne parle pas français.” 
“And what a handy sentence that is when you don’t speak French!” Pierre grinned and James couldn’t help but chuckle and shake his head. 
“Okay, I’ll try and get my act together and ask her out…and learn more French.” 
“That’s the spirit!” Carlo patted his back. “Now let’s go get a drink and relax.” 
“Maybe after we study for our physics midterm?” James nudged his friend and Jian nodded his head in agreement. 
“Fine, I guess if we have to,” Carlo sighed. 
“Not everyone is naturally good at kinematics, Carlo. Take pity on us mere mortals who have to study,” Pierre responded, eliciting a chuckle from his buddies. 
James was quiet as he thought to himself. If he could get a B on this physics test, maybe there was hope for him getting his act together after all.
Summer break rolled around faster than James had expected. While Jian went back to Richmond, Pierre over to Quebec City, and Carlo to Chicago, James was left alone in Montreal, working to help pay his tuition for the next year. Being an international student was no joke. 
He would have gone back to New Jersey, but the positions he applied to in Montreal paid more so it wasn’t a hard decision to make. 
His parents would come visit him for some time in July, but for the most part he was alone. 
On late nights, he’d make his way to the McDonald’s in the neighbourhood, not knowing enough French to go anywhere else nearby. At least there, most of them spoke enough English to take his order, and if not it was really easy to point to the menu. 
“It’s already done?” he asked. 
“Give us some credit, hein. We knew you were coming, we had it ready.” 
James chuckled and handed him the money for the order, exchanging it for the bag which he took to a table and sat down. 
As he was pulling out his fries from his bag he heard the chime of the door and looked up curiously to see who was coming at this time of night. 
He stopped what he was doing when he recognized you, watching as you dug through your purse and spoke to the cashier in French. You both laughed about something James couldn’t quite catch and a little while later, after you had paid they handed you a bag and an ice cream cone when James heard you say something about ‘deux cuillères’ taking the utensils they gave you and turing straight towards James’ table, pulling out the chair across from him and sitting down. 
“I thought you lived in New Jersey,” you said. 
James was still stunned that you had noticed him and couldn’t find the words to speak. 
“Hey, heart-eyes?” you waved your hand in front of his face. “You okay?” 
“Y-Yeah,” he nodded, distracting himself by pulling out his burger from his bag. 
“So why aren’t you in Jersey?” you asked. 
“Work. I got a job here, it paid better.” 
“Hmm,” you hummed thoughtfully while eating some of your fries. “And all your friends?” 
“Back with their families, unfortunately for me,” he nodded. “W-What about you?” 
“Oh, I live here,” you shrugged. “In this neighbourhood actually.” 
“You live here?” he asked. 
“That’s what I said,” you nodded. 
“And so that’s how you know French?” 
“Every kid in Quebec learns French, it’s kind of a non-negotiable,” you shared. “I gather that’s why you’re eating here.” 
“Yeah, Pierre didn’t manage to teach me enough before he left,” he sighed and started to eat his meal. 
“I could teach you if you want. I’m taking a little break this summer so I have some spare time,” you offered. 
“Oh, I don’t want to-,” 
“James, you’re gonna have a shitty summer if you don’t say yes.”
He couldn’t argue with that, it would be nice to communicate more with the people who lived around him. 
“Okay, sure, but I’m warning you, I’m a terrible student.” 
“I used to tutor one of my siblings, trust me it can’t be worse than that,” you laughed. 
You chatted a little more, finishing your meals but not before you handed James a spoon. 
“So this is cuillère then?” he asked. “I-I overheard you talking to Jean.” 
“Yeah, your pronunciation isn’t bad either,” you nodded. “Here.” 
You pushed the ice cream cone between you and began to eat it with the spoon. James had a bit of a sweet tooth and wouldn’t be one to refuse dessert so he began to share the ice cream cone with you. 
“So, are you missing your girl in New Jersey?” you asked and James cursed internally, trying to come up with a lie to tell you. 
“Um, no not really,” he shook his head. “I don’t think we would have worked out anyways.” 
“Oh, so are your friends still calling you heart-eyes?” 
He nodded his head, thinking it was better not to say anything in case he gave himself away. 
“It’s good that you recognized you wouldn’t work out before you asked her out,” you said, “Couple guys wanted to go on dates with me this year, but just didn’t seem like the right fit. Plus, I don’t really think I’m looking for anything like that right now.”
James nodded his head again, silently eating the ice cream. 
“Ever been in love, James?” you asked. 
“That’s a really loaded question to ask someone you cornered in a McDonald’s at 11 P.M.” 
You ignored his response and continued, 
“I haven’t, it seems like such a big thing, how would you even know if it was love?” 
James looked up at the ceiling, silently asking God to not let him say something stupid, 
“I think most of the time it comes on gradually, maybe you won’t even know it at first.” 
“So you have been in love,” you confirmed and he shrugged his shoulders. 
“I…I don’t know. Maybe I have.” 
“That’s not a very straightforward answer.” 
“Then maybe I haven’t. I feel like if it was love, you’d figure it out, eventually.” 
You pursed your lips and nodded your head. 
“I hope I get to fall in love,” you smiled softly to yourself. “Seems nice.” 
“Yeah,” James agreed. “It does.” 
A few years later… 
“So how did it go?” Jian asked, as they sat around James’ small living room. 
“It…could have been better,” James sucked in some air through his teeth, recalling a recent memory from earlier that afternoon. 
“What the fuck James! You scared the shit out of me! I could have broken the hemocytometer, do you know how much that shit costs?!” 
“Sorry!” James quickly apologized and dropped his books down on the nearest surface to help you clean up, making you look up again at him with disdain. 
“In the BSC? Really? Now we have to resterilize and all the specimens I have in there are as good as compromised.” 
“Shit,” James muttered under his breath, he was usually so much better in the lab, but the second he was with you he became a bumbling mess. “I-I’ll take care of the BSC, I’m so sorry.” 
You sighed and removed your gloves, pinching the bridge of your nose. 
“It’s not just boiling water we’re dealing with anymore, James,” you said a little more calmly than before. “You’ve gotta be more careful, okay? I’m not losing my job over this.” 
James nodded his head and went to grab the things to sterilize the biological safety cabinet and grab the new specimen from the fridge. So much for trying to get a job at LSRC to impress you. 
“I was not built to be a researcher,” James shook his head. 
“I mean, it’s not that big of a screw up, you fixed it eventually, didn’t you?” Pierre asked.
“Yeah, but not until after a thorough amount of embarrassment.” 
“I thought girls found clumsy guys endearing,” Carlo commented. 
“Not when the girl is determined to become the leading medical researcher on the continent,” James sighed. “Maybe taking this job was a bad idea. From what I can see she hasn’t even changed her opinion on dating, she hasn’t been with anyone these past three years.” 
“Do you hear that?” Carlo removed his feet from the coffee table and placed them on the ground. “You’ve been in love with her for three years and haven’t done anything about it.” 
“Who said I was in love with her? And sure, maybe I haven’t made a move, but I learnt French!” James tried to defend himself, pointing to Pierre. 
“That’s not as good of a comeback as you think it is,” Pierre shook his head. 
“I know,” James hung his head low and sat on the couch between Pierre and Jian. “We’re gonna graduate in a year and she’s not gonna know I’m in love with her.” 
“So you are in love with her?” Jian looked over at his friend sympathetically. 
James leaned back and used the heels of his palms to cover his eyes. 
“He’s gonna have a meltdown, don’t ask him that,” Pierre shook his head. 
“God, I do love her!” he exclaimed like he was just finding it out for the first time himself. 
“What did I say,” Pierre sighed. 
“Can I make it stop?” James looked over at his friends who all shrugged. “I am so screwed.” 
“This time, I think we agree with you,” Carlo took a sip of his drink. “Good luck, man.” 
James squeezed his eyes shut, he would definitely need it. 
The year passed to graduation and James was still sitting on his feelings. It was much too late now to say anything. You’d already been accepted to a graduate program through your work with the LSRC and James had passed his MCAT with flying colours and was on his way to medical school at Columbia. 
As much as he didn’t want to admit it, he was going to miss Montreal, the city had grown on him during his time there and a part of him wished he could stay. 
His friends were also ready for the next stages in their studies, all going to different places across the continent to get their other degrees, with, of course, the promise to stay in touch. 
James didn’t know what the next little bit of his life had in store for him, but he hoped regardless of where he ended up, maybe he’d be able to make up for his missed opportunities. 
The years of medical school, once started, passed faster than James expected them to, and by the end of it, much to his own surprise, he’d also gotten married. 
You were almost all but forgotten in the back of his mind, but time continued to play its games. 
Medical school turned into a specialization in oncology, and a divorce. Then residency and a marriage. Then a second divorce. Then another marriage and more recently a position at a hospital in his hometown, on the board and a well respected oncologist and a few new friends…and a third divorce. 
“House, I’m not asking you to let them all sleep in your apartment, it’s just a dinner for one night, we’ll be out and about for the rest of the time that they’re here,” James sighed. 
“Can’t you just cancel?” House asked. “Divorce seems like a pretty good reason to get out of a reunion.” 
“See, the thing is, I’d rather not be miserable and see my friends instead, and they bought their tickets months ago. Please, House, I’ll do the dishes for a week.” 
“A month,” House said. 
“Two weeks,” James negotiated and House nodded, so they shook on it. 
“Good, now that I’ve done you a favour, you can do me one,” House smiled, but the kind of smile that was conniving, like he had something up his sleeve all along. 
“I paid you in chores for my favour, who says I owe you anything?” 
“Unless you want me to call your friends and cancel for you, you’ll do it,” House continued to walk the hospital’s hallways hobbling with his cane. 
“What is it?” James sighed, catching up with him. 
“We have a patient and he doesn’t speak very good English, but he does speak French. You went to McGill didn’t you? Must have picked up some of the love language.” 
“Unfortunately for me in this case, I did,” he nodded. 
“Perfect, come with me now,” House motioned with his head to the patient’s room and James trailed behind him. 
When he entered the room, House motioned for him to begin speaking. James hadn’t spoken a lot of French since his undergrad so he was definitely rusty, but he supposed it was better than nothing and began to explain that he would be helping with the translation.
“Erm, Bonjour, je suis Dr. Wilson, je vais aider Dr. House avec la traduction.” 
The man looked at James strangely before saying. 
“You’re an anglophone, but you speak French like you’re Quebecois.” 
“I um did my undergraduate in Montreal, I learnt how to speak there,” James responded back in French. 
“Hmm.” 
James could tell this wasn’t going to be fun. Some of the French held quite a bit of hate towards Quebec, who knew why, but his accent definitely wasn’t going to help him in this situation. 
House got James to ask some routine medical history questions and a few things about his symptoms all the while James had to filter out all the insults that were coming his way with regards to his “poor use of language” and “unintelligible accent”. 
When he could finally leave the room, James let out a string of French curses under his breath, still thinking in the other language. 
“House, why can’t you just get a proper translator?” he asked. “I’m terrible at this.” 
“Cuddy said something about making a big purchase recently and being currently unable to do so, especially since you put that you speak French in your resume. Bet you’re regretting that one now.” 
“Yeah,” James nodded his head. “Big time.” 
They began to walk towards the elevator to go to the cafeteria for lunch, when James decided to inquire more about Cuddy’s big purchase. 
“Oh, she said something about money this, medical research that,” House shook his head, “You know I stopped listening the second she wouldn’t give me what I wanted.” 
“She hired a medical researcher,” James said aloud, chewing on the words, “I wonder who she-,” 
His train of thought was cut off when he saw, near the elevator, a face he hadn’t seen since graduation day at McGill. 
Quickly, unable to think of anything else to do, he ran into the administrative area and hid crouched down behind a photocopier. 
House watched his friend curiously before walking over towards him and leaning against the copier asked him if he’d gone insane. 
“No, I just, um, remembered I needed to copy some patient files,” he lied. 
“You don’t have any with you,” House said. 
“I faxed them from my office,” he lied again. 
“I think I need to go get Foreman, clearly you’re having a neurological breakdown,” House said. 
“Can you just stop making it obvious I’m here?!” James exclaimed in a whisper. 
Unfortunately for him, as you were walking past, his harsh whisper made his location obvious, causing you to look down and see his familiar face. 
“Oh my God, heart-eyes, is that you?” you asked with a smile and James pressed his lips in a thin line and nodded. “What are you doing down there?” 
James became speechless and suddenly he was an eighteen-year-old back in his chemistry lab. 
“He’s checking to see if we need more toner,” House said, lying for his friend, but James knew that was all he would get out of him. “Well, that’s my cue to leave, you guys have fun.” 
You reached down and offered James a hand, helping him back into a standing position. 
“I haven’t seen you in so long,” you commented. “Like since we were-,” 
“22,” James filled in and you nodded. 
“Yeah,” you bit your lip before asking him how he had been. 
“Oh, you know,” he shrugged his shoulders. “I-I’m assuming you’re the medical researcher Cuddy hired?” 
“That would be correct,” you smiled. 
“Why did you choose to work here? I thought you were some big hotshot in Canada?” 
“I am a big hotshot, which is why I wanted to come to a teaching hospital. I thought maybe it would give more opportunities to teach other people what I know. It’s a win-win. I get to do what I want to and the hospital gets grant money from my research,” you explained. “It looks like you got where you wanted to be too, Mr. Oncologist.” 
“Actually it’s Dr. Oncologist,” he joked and you laughed, making his cheeks go red after hearing the sound.
“I missed having you around, James. We should catch up sometime,” you suggested. 
“Yeah sure,” he nodded. “I-I’d love that.” 
You excused yourself, needing to go introduce yourself to a class of medical students, waving goodbye to James, leaving him stuck in his tracks for a few moments before he could gather his senses again and head downstairs for lunch. 
“We could have rescheduled if this was too much, man,” Carlo watched James as he brought a large roast to the table for them to eat. 
“See? What did I tell you,” House rolled his eyes and James gave him a disapproving stare. 
“No, I wanted you guys to come, we’ve been planning this for months. I wasn’t going to let anything get in the way of it,” he assured his friends. “Plus, we know how hard it is to nail down Pierre, I swear you are always travelling. Every time we talk you’re in a different country.” 
“That’s the life of a parasitologist,” he shrugged and helped James by beginning to cut the roast. 
“And Jian, how’s the wife and kids?” 
“They’re good,” Jian smiled. “Mei started first grade in September. Becky and I are both up for promotions at the hospital, so I can’t really complain. Although I think Carlo can.” 
“Seriously it’s not that big of a deal,” Carlo groaned, “Sure yeah, pharmaceuticals are more flashy than biophysics, but that doesn’t mean that my research wasn’t better.” 
“Well if it was better why did William get the award?” James asked and Carlo just flipped him the bird. 
“Didn’t we go to school with him?” Pierre asked. 
“We did?” James raised a brow. 
“Yeah, for a year, from Toronto, huge stoner. Hated being there and did literally no work, but still managed to get honours,” Jian explained. 
“Sounds like my kinda guy,” House commented and James rolled his eyes. 
Just as they continued to dish out dinner, House’s pager went off and he sighed, excusing himself from the table while practically threatening James to leave him some food. 
When House left, James’ friends saw their opening and began their personal line of questioning. 
“Hey, James, are you really okay?” Jian asked. 
“Why wouldn’t I be okay?” James asked in return. 
“You’re getting a divorce,” Pierre said. “Seems like a pretty good reason to not be okay.” 
James shook his head, 
“Yeah sure, it’s a shitty situation,” he admitted. “Did I imagine myself at this point in my life with three failed marriages? No, definitely not. Can I do anything to change it? Also no, and right now I really wouldn’t want to change it.” 
“Can we ask what happened?” Carlo queried. 
“She cheated on me, then left me,” James said simply. 
“Forgive me,” Pierre said. “But you seemed a lot more upset when we talked over the phone last week. What changed?” 
James looked down at his plate and cut into his roast, thinking about what Pierre had said. It was true, even earlier today he was sulking about, that was until he ran into you. 
“I swear,” James started, “if you guys make a big deal about this I will murder you all,” he used his knife to point at all of them and they nodded, swearing their silence. “I’ve got heart-eyes again.” 
“You met someone new?” Jian asked and Carlo shook his head. 
“No, he re-met someone old. Tell me, did your hospital recently hire a medical researcher?” 
James nodded his head and the table was about to erupt into a loud chorus of comments when James gave them a look and they all restrained themselves. 
“James, I’m being dead serious when I say this, but you should have married her,” Pierre insisted. “I never saw you look at anyone else the way you looked at her.” 
“Probably explains the three divorces then, doesn’t it? I was still in love with her the whole time,” James sighed. “It’s going to come up eventually, seems like a pretty big indicator that I’m not good at relationships.” 
“Who knows, maybe she won’t care,” Jian offered. 
“What was it like when you saw her again?” Carlo asked, looking for any opportunity to tease his friend. 
“How do you think it was? I could barely talk, I was a nervous wreck, and blushing like crazy,” he shook his head at the thought of it. “I could literally feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. I feel like a middle school girl every time I’m near her.”
“Who knows, maybe she still thinks you have circulation issues,” Jian shrugged and the table laughed. 
“What I would give to stay here and watch this play out,” Carlo sighed and leaned back in his seat. 
“Knowing James, you’d have to be here for ten years before he made a move on her,” Pierre raised a brow and James threw a piece of potato at him. 
“If you ever do get the guts to ask her out, call us. We’ve made bets on this,” Carlo added. 
“Real comforting, guys,” James ate a bite of the roast. “I thought this was supposed to be my pity party.” 
“Not anymore,” Jian shook his head. “You’ve got heart-eyes.” 
This time around, James thought maybe he didn’t mind the nickname as much as he used to. 
“I would think they’d get you your own office at this point,” James commented as he entered his office, seeing you sitting at his desk, eating a pre-packed lunch. 
“Beats me,” you shrugged and continued to eat. 
“So you’ve decided that invading my office is your next best bet?” 
“Oh hush,” you waved him off with your fork. 
“Well, excuse me for wanting to come to a safe place after being verbally assaulted by House’s patient,” he sat on the opposite side of the desk and leaned back in the chair. 
“Verbally assaulted?” you asked. “By a patient who isn’t even your own?” 
“He doesn’t like the way I speak French,” James rolled his eyes. “I’m translating while they’re treating him since the department used all its money hiring you.” 
“What can I say, hotshots cost a lot of money.” 
“You know, you could do the translation, probably much better than I can,” he noted. 
“I could, but you probably need the practice more than I do, chèri,” you scrunched your nose in a cute mocking way and James could feel the blood rushing to his cheeks yet again. “You still keeping up with that posse of yours?” you asked, changing the subject. 
“Yeah, they all flew in to visit a few days ago, we’re gonna go out tonight,” he said. “Do you…maybe want to join us?” he suggested. 
“I don’t have plans, as long as they’re okay with it I’d love to come,” you smiled. 
“Oh trust me, they will definitely be okay with it.” 
Later that night, James was drinking deeply from his glass while he watched his friends stare blankly ahead at you. If he looked anything like they did all those times his words were caught in his throat, then he hoped to spontaneously combust right then and there. 
“Heart-eyes, I thought you said they were okay with me coming?” you leaned over and whispered to him. 
James put down his glass and nodded his head. 
“They are okay with it, right?” 
Snapping out of their daze, the three men nodded their heads and finally began professing assurances that everything was fine. 
“It’s just… you said James invited you?” Jian asked with furrowed bows. 
“Yeah,” you nodded. “He mentioned you guys were in town and getting together tonight and asked me if I wanted to join.” 
James bit down on his tongue trying not to say anything, but also gave his friends a look to shut up before they gave anything away. He knew what was running through their minds, they were wondering how the hell he’d gotten the guts to ask you to come, but there was one fundamental difference between tonight and any other time he could have possibly asked you. This wasn’t a date, therefore, there was no pressure. 
“Maybe you could tell them what you’ve been up to since they last saw you?” James suggested. 
“Oh, um, well, I got my master’s degree and doctorate at McGill, both for research in cancer biology-,” 
“Cancer biology?” Pierre interrupted. “I don’t remember you mentioning you were interested in that.” 
“I-I wasn’t initially,” you admitted. “Just after spending more time in the LSRC and a few other irrelevant things I decided it was the best fit for me to focus on.” 
“You and heart-eyes make a pretty good pair then,” Carlo raised his eyebrows suggestively and took a sip of his drink. 
“I guess we do,” you chuckled. “As long as he leaves the research to me. We all know what he’s like in the lab.” 
“I resent that,” James protested only before saying, “but I do deserve it.” 
“It’s a miracle he hasn’t had a medical malpractice suit,” Pierre added. 
You asked the boys about where their various careers had taken them and how they were each doing. The conversation stayed pretty normal until the topic changed to relationships, starting with Jian’s wife and family back in Vancouver and Pierre’s husband who was currently in Australia doing research on some massive insect. 
“What about you Carlo?” you asked. “Anyone special in your life?” 
“Nah,” he waved his hand. 
“What about the mom of the kid who pet sits for you?” Jian asked. 
“That kid charges me per animal, per size. If I were to date his mom he’d probably charge me for dating her too, and I don’t think I can afford his price,” he shook his head and the table laughed. 
“James, you’ve been quiet,” you said. “Nothing to share?” 
James nervously took a sip of his drink and looked over at his friends for help. 
“James hasn’t had the best luck in love,” Pierre settled on. 
“Oh, haven’t found anybody, that’s not a big deal,” you assured him. “I haven’t either.” 
“Well,” Carlo said in a high-pitched voice. “It’s not exactly that he hasn’t found anybody.” 
“So there’s someone-?” 
“I’m divorced,” James blurted. “Three times. Or soon to be three anyway.” 
“Oh,” you paused and tried to think of the right thing to say, but for the moment settled on nothing while Pierre changed the subject. 
After the visit was over, James offered to walk you to your car and you accepted. The walk started off in silence, but you decided to break it. 
“You know, I hope you find the right person eventually,” you said. “It’s unfortunate things didn’t work out three times.” 
“Yeah,” James nodded in agreement. “I-um, do you ever think about that conversation we had, in the McDonald’s by my apartment?” 
“Sometimes I do,” you admitted. 
“Looking back on that, I wonder if we ever really loved each other. If we did this probably wouldn’t have happened. We would have fixed things, worked on ourselves instead of just…giving up.” 
“So I guess you still haven’t fallen in love yet?” you asked, but he stayed silent. “Whoever it is, I’m sure things will find a way to work out for you.”
“The moment may have passed on that,” he said with his hands shoved in his pockets and looking down at the ground. 
“You never know, James. Sometimes life has a funny way of surprising you.” 
James watched as his colleagues and a few of the students from the university left the lecture hall while he continued to sit in his seat, watching you walk up towards him. 
“Don’t you have patients or something?” you asked. “You’re at all of my lectures.” 
“Doesn’t it seem appropriate for an oncologist to attend a cancer biology lecture?” he asked as you sat down next to him. 
“I suppose so,” you sighed. “Doesn’t explain why you weren’t taking notes though.” 
James looked down at his empty hands and cursed a little internally. 
“It’s okay,” you assured him. “I don’t mind the staring, it reminds me of school.” 
“You noticed?” he asked. 
“You weren’t very subtle,” you chuckled. 
“Yeah, not one of my strong suits,” he blushed, embarrassed. 
“Do you wanna go grab lunch before your break is over?” you asked and James nodded, standing up and offering you a hand to get out of your seat. 
You went to the cafeteria, running into his friend House who managed to get his food paid for by James, yet again, before leaving to go back up to his office and work on another differential diagnosis with his employees. 
“Did all the guys get back home safe after their trip?” you asked, digging into your food. 
“Carlo and Jian are back home, Pierre went to go be with Ollie in Australia.”
“It must be hard not living near them.” 
James sighed and nodded his head. “It’s a balance. When they’re being annoying, it’s great that they don’t live here and when they’re not, it sucks.” 
“Spoken like a true friend,” you chuckled. 
“What about you? Do you still keep in touch with people from school? During any of your degrees?” 
“Not really,” you shook your head. “After my undergrad I became so laser focused on my school I didn’t pay attention to relationships that much outside of my family. Starting to regret it a bit now.” 
“Kind of hard to have a good conversation with cancer cells,” James said sarcastically and you shook your head. “Do you like it in New Jersey so far?” 
“Not as much as back home,” you admitted, “but it is nice to have a friend here.”
“Yeah, Jersey is…an acquired taste,” he settled on, making you laugh, but your laughter was cut off by the sound of his pager, and he looked down to see what the message was before quickly standing up. “Sorry, I have to-,” 
“Don’t worry,” you assured him. “I’ll pack up your food and bring it to your office.” 
“Thanks,” he nodded and you waved goodbye as he ran off out of the cafeteria and to the oncology floor to go help one of his patients. 
James didn’t find himself walking around the campus often, but when he did it was usually because he had to clear his head. With everything that was going on in his life, in addition to the circumstances of this case, he was taking it harder than normal. 
He had left his coat in his office as the hot New Jersey sun was already beating down, his hands shoved in his pockets and his eyes following his feet as he took his steps forward. 
He didn’t notice you sitting on a bench as he was passing by. Curious as to his state, you stood up and went to meet up with him. 
“Hey James, are you okay?” 
Your voice pulled him out of his thoughts almost instantly. He stopped to look up at you, seeing the concern reflecting in your eyes. 
He took his hands out of his pockets and motioned for you to walk with him. 
“I lost a patient today,” he explained. “He was 11.” 
“Oh, James, I’m so sorry,” you said softly. 
“In med school you learn pretty quickly if you don’t find a way to deal with what you face every day the result is never good,” he said and you noticed him chewing on the inside of his cheek, “but it was just too sunny outside. How could it be sunny on a day like this?” 
You didn’t say anything initially, only intertwining your hand with his and giving it a light squeeze which he returned. 
“You know, I think it’s probably okay, every once in a while, to let yourself mourn your patients. Just like everyone else. You have a uniquely difficult job, James, and no one would hold it against you if you need a minute to adjust.” 
James stopped walking and you followed his lead, only to have him let go of your hand and pull you into a tight hug. You easily wrapped your arms around his neck while his arms were around your waist. 
“You’re a good doctor, James,” you mumbled. “I know, even if you don’t quite believe it right now, you did everything you could to help that young boy and make him more comfortable.” 
You could feel him nod his head, clearly not trusting himself to say anything at the moment. 
Neither of you wanted to let go, but you knew that you both had work to get back to. James had other patients he was responsible for and you had some work to do in one of the hospital labs. 
So silently, hand in hand, you accompanied each other back to the hospital, grateful for each other’s company. 
“I swear, if I stay there any longer I’m going to go mad,” James whispered to you under his breath as you walked along the halls of the hospital with him to help him run some tests for a few patients. 
“What was it this time?” you asked, huddling in closer, waiting for him to spill the beans on why living with his best friend was becoming unbearable. 
“He keeps pranking me,” he began to explain and you could see how frustrated he was just by his hand movements. “Last night he thought of the genius idea to put my hand in warm water while I was sleeping and-,” James stopped himself, realizing he’d divulged too much, just as your eyes went wide. 
“Oh my God you didn’t wet the bed did you?” you asked in a chuckle and James quickly covered your mouth saying, 
“Shh! The whole hospital doesn’t need to hear you!” 
You couldn’t hold in your laugh, muffled by James’ hand over your mouth and his cheeks were a bright cherry red. 
Eventually you pulled his hand away and said, 
“You definitely need to get out of there. That’s criminal.” 
“Exactly what I’m saying,” James agreed. 
“Hey, why don’t you come over to my place tonight?” you suggested. “We can watch a movie or something together.” 
“That sounds like exactly what I need right now,” he nodded his head. “What time?” 
“Come over at eight, it’ll give me some time to get snacks and get ready.” 
“You’ve got yourself a deal,” he held out his hand and you took it shaking it firmly. 
Later that evening while James was getting ready, House watched him curiously. 
“I still don’t believe that you blowdry your hair,” he said loudly over the sound of the appliance. 
“Believe it or not, I do,” James responded. 
“It just seems so pointless, your hair is messy anyways,” he crossed his arms and James gave him a look. 
“My hair looks fine, yours on the other hand could use a trim and about a billion other things,” James retorted.
“So, is this a date?” House asked, changing the topic. 
“No, it’s not a date,” James shook his head. “It’s an opportunity for me to get away from your insanity.” 
“Are you sure it’s not a date?” he asked. 
“What makes you think it's a date?” he finally gave in and turned around to face his friend, turning off the blow dryer. 
“Well if you asked her if you could come over, probably not a date, but if she offered…” he shrugged his shoulders. 
James shook his head, he didn’t want to allow himself to believe it was true, because if it was, he’d probably overthink things and make a fool of himself. 
“It’s not a date,” he reiterated and House stopped pressing, seeing as his friend would not be reasoned with. 
James finished fixing his hair and grabbed his keys and a coat before stepping out of the door. 
It didn’t take him long to drive to your house and when he knocked at the door he heard shuffling inside before the lock clicked and you opened it. 
“Hey! You got the dress code memo,” you joked, pointing to his McGill sweater and then back at yours. 
“I thought you might like a blast from the past,” he smiled and you invited him inside. 
As he entered he noticed the array of pillows on the couch, blankets draped over arm chairs, and books piled on every surface possible. To top it off, the house was currently only lit by lamps allowing a warm orange hue to fall over the space. It made James’ shoulders relax and he could even feel his nervous heart rate slow. 
“Do you like it?” you asked. “I am by no means an interior decorator, but I tried to make it feel cozy so it’s nice to come back to after long days at work.” 
“I do like it,” James nodded. “A lot. It feels like a home.” 
“Perfect, that’s exactly what I was going for,” you smiled. “You’re the first guest I’ve had here, you know?” 
“Really? No fancy dinner parties with the hospital board?” 
“No, not yet,” you chuckled. “Unfortunately, this guy in the oncology department keeps taking up all my time.”
You grabbed his hand and dragged him over to the couch. 
“But don’t worry, I don’t mind.” 
After he took off his coat, you both sat down next to each other, James extending his hand along the back of the couch and you naturally sat right up next to him, leaning forward to grab the remote and turn on the movie. 
“What did you pick?” James asked. 
“Just some random horror movie,” you said. “I heard it’s really cheesy.” 
“We’ll see about that,” James raised his brows and grabbed the popcorn from the table, putting it in between you both. 
You pressed play once you were both settled and tossed the remote to the side of the couch, curling your legs up and waiting in anticipation for the movie to begin.
It didn’t take long for the horror plot to begin, jumping right into the satanic murders and supernatural deaths. Just as you had predicted, it was cheesy, but that didn’t stop you from being startled whenever something popped up unexpectedly on the screen. 
Both of you were lulled into a false sense of security during what seemed like a quiet part of the movie, then, all of a sudden, the killer jumped into the frame with a loud change in the soundtrack, causing you to shriek and move towards James, also feeling him jump slightly from being startled. 
You both looked up at each other and laughed at the ridiculousness of your collective fright. 
“You’re supposed to be the calm one,” you elbowed him. 
“I know it just-Jesus!” James found himself inadvertently closing his eyes and wrapping his arm around you as if it would give him some protection from what was on the screen. 
You laughed again and leaned closer into his side, patting his leg to assure him it was safe to open his eyes again. 
“You must enjoy torturing me, that’s the only explanation for this,” James looked over at you and you shook your head. 
“Come on, heart-eyes, you think that lowly of me?” 
James couldn’t stop the smile that creeped past his lips, “No, of course not.” 
“Good, that means I still have the upper hand,” you moved your head to look back at the TV, but not before James tickled you in retaliation for your words. 
It took a moment, but you eventually surrendered and moved your focus back to the movie, still feeling a little warm from your laughter. 
You grabbed some of the other candies and snacks from the table, holding a gummy bear up for James to try and he did without so much as a second thought. 
“Still have a sweet tooth I see,” you offered him a different candy which he ate again and nodded. 
“You don’t want to know how many cavities I’ve had.” 
“Here,” you handed him a wrapped treat. “This one’s special from home.” 
“Maple candies,” he smiled. “They don’t make ‘em like they do in Montreal.” 
“They were your favourite, right?” you asked. 
James looked over at you again curiously, “You remembered that?” 
“Of course I did,” you shrugged. “Oh wait, look,” you pointed to the TV before grimacing and covering your eyes, but still peeking through your fingers. “Ew!” 
James just smiled at you, finding it harder and harder to resist the urge to kiss you, the thought bringing a warm sensation to his stomach. 
He settled instead on doing what he’d been doing forever: staring at you with heart-eyes. 
James tried to fight a yawn as he grabbed one of the many books on the shelves in his office, taking it to his couch and sitting down next to you. 
“You don’t have to do this, James,” you told him. “You probably have to be back tomorrow morning, you should go home and rest.” 
“No, no, it’s fine,” he insisted. “You look in here for that article I was telling you about and I’ll start proofreading.” 
There were many papers and files strewn around the couch, you couldn’t remember when you first came in, but James never seemed to mind when you worked in his office instead of your own. 
“Are you sure?” you asked. “I feel like I brought a tornado in here.” 
James looked up from your paper and nodded his head. 
“Now hush and let me read.” 
“Sorry, sorry,” you chuckled, opening the medical journal he had handed you, flipping through the contents until you found the article title he had mentioned. 
James had a pen in his hand, scribbling down annotations on the side, correcting a few typos and grammatical errors. 
For the most part, he was able to follow along, but at one point, the words became so incoherent he tapped you to make sure his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him. 
“What does this say here?” he asked. “I-I don’t know if my eyes just stopped working, but what does stirring in sugar and eggs have to do with this trial treatment?” 
“Oh my God,” you grabbed the paper and looked at it closer. “I must have accidentally copied some of my mom’s cookie recipe on here before changing documents. What in the world is going on with me?” 
Maybe it was the exhaustion settling in or some other things James couldn’t quite pinpoint, but he felt himself letting out a chuckle that grew a little longer, and longer until it was a full blown laugh. 
It was an honest mistake, and arguably not that funny, but you’d be hard pressed to convince him of that in that moment, and instead, seeing the silliness of the situation, you joined in.
Eventually, when the laughter died down, you and James both leaning far back against the couch, he turned to you and apologized. 
“I’m sorry, I should probably read this when I have a bit more sanity.” 
“Don’t be,” you patted his leg. “I can always use a good laugh.” 
With your heads still turned to face each other, you suggested to pause the work and resume it another time, to which James agreed. 
You both continued to sit there in silence, looking over at each other and James caught a glimmer of something in your eyes and had to blink a few times to make sure it was still there. It was a soft look, a little dazed, like you were happily daydreaming about something far off. It took him a moment to realize it, since he had been the one giving that look, he’d never really had a chance to see it for himself. 
You had heart-eyes. 
And more importantly, you had them while you were looking at James. 
With a sudden boost of courage, fuelled by lowered inhibitions, he started by asking, 
“Have I ever told you why my friends call me heart-eyes?” 
You tilted your head a little, following his lead and sitting up straight. 
“Wasn’t it because of that girl you had a crush on that was from here?” 
James opened his mouth and then shut it, shaking his head. 
“There was never a girl from Jersey,” he admitted. 
“Why would they say it was a girl from Jersey if there was…” as you said the sentence you slowed down, the realization dawning on you. 
“All the staring makes a bit more sense now?” he asked. 
You blinked a few times, “I just thought you were really awkward,” you said. 
“I was, but if the staring didn’t give it away the blushing really should have done it,” he chuckled. 
“I thought you had a circulation issue!” you exclaimed and James burst out laughing, of course you did. “God, James, why didn’t you say anything?” 
James shook his head, “I could barely string out a coherent sentence when I was around you. Makes it a little hard to say anything.” 
“Makes me wish I had said something,” you said, feeling your own cheeks heat up at the admission. 
“Y-You would’ve said something?” 
Now it was James’ turn to be surprised. 
“I think most of the time it comes on gradually, maybe you won’t even know it at first. That’s what you said to me, but that eventually, if it was love, I’d know it.” 
You reached out and held James’ hands in your own. 
“I should have said something. I could have said something. We could have had so much more-,” 
“James,” you whispered, interrupting him and he stopped. “Shut up and kiss me.” 
James wasn’t going to waste another second, removing his hands from your to instead gently hold your face, bringing you closer to him so he could finally do what he had been dreaming about since he was 18 years old. 
The dim light of his desk lamp, the papers crumpled beneath and around you, the way you moved closer and slid into his lap, his hands now on your hips and your fingers snaking through his hair, it all melted into one and if you let yourselves imagine, just a bit, the lamp became a light in the library; the papers became unfinished homework assignments and lab write-ups, and you hadn’t missed a second of the time you could have spent together. 
Your kisses soon turned slow and repetitive and neither of you wanted to pull away, living in the moment like it was your last. 
“When…did you realize…you loved me?” you asked between kisses, moving away from his mouth, instead letting your lips find their way across his jaw and up to his temple. 
“Our last year of school,” he paused your kisses so he could kiss you properly again. “Carlo said something and-,” he shook his head and sighed. “I realized I was going to leave without you ever knowing how I felt and even though eventually I thought maybe I’d stopped loving you and started to love other people…I just kept trying to fill that space that only you fit in.” 
“First year of my master’s for me,” you rested your forehead against his. “Suddenly you weren’t there anymore and I really wished that wasn’t the case.” 
He tilted his head up to meet you in another kiss that was far too easy to melt into. Neither of you had any complaints and you knew you’d never get tired looking into his heart-eyes.
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@cuntyvicodin
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roturo · 10 months
Text
BITE ME
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summary: being a vampire hunter wasn't easy, and it became rougher when you encountered a cute tall white-haired vampire that would change up your opinions about them
warnings: smut, blood, vampire!gojo x vampire hunter!reader, sub!gojo, dacryphilia, gojo cries during sex lmao, kinda rushed, piv, unprotected sex, overstimulation, kinda fucked dumb tbh, blood lust, like it was love at first sight yass, no one is in their right mind, just horny tbh, loved this idea, maybe oc gojo idk, bc he's such a cutie pie here, aghdhsagbdy this is cute that im even surprised, never wrote for sub!gojo but idk, enjoy.
TUMBLR IS BASED ON A REBLOG SYSTEM. PLEASE REBLOG MY WORK.
Since little you were taught many things, but the most important one is to always hate vampires.
Living in a community divided by unnatural human beings and well, humans, made society enter into a conflict if both kinds of communities should mix. 
Your family was a well known vampire hunter, you lived in a forest far away from the city where most of the vampires usually exist between humans. Being a medical student made you learn a lot about the species that killed your dad. So being a recognized ‘vampire hunter’ wasn’t such a good thing.
Maybe that’s why you couldn’t stand being near them, nor living with them. That’s why when you had a vampire as a patient (who are most of the time the ½ vampires) you made sure of learning all about them, learning how to defend yourself from them, and even might kill them.
You have a specific freezer for human blood and some samples of whatever type of blood vampires have. Spending most of the time examining the different types of cells and differences from the human blood.
And that’s the thing. Having human blood and being alone in the middle of nowhere is not the safest option to avoid vampires.
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Gojo Satoru is a well respected young vampire, not by his ancestors though, since he decided to live more of a ‘pacific lifestyle.’ Humans had this thing where vampires couldn’t feed themselves with human blood. At this rate he doesn’t know if the new generations are good for everyone or just for humans, and do not even dare to talk about animal blood, that’s disgusting. 
But when he has the chance of drinking human blood, I'm telling you, this man becomes insatiable. Maybe that’s why society invented other types of supplements for vampires. But coming from a lofty clan, he couldn’t live from those disgusting things human called ‘’food’’
And well... when he saw this cute lady coming out from the hospital with a case full of blood bags (thanks to his supernatural power to identify the delectable human blood on his own) he couldn’t resist himself from following you until you got home.
Please let it be possible that vampires can be knocked out, you thought. You couldn't believe a vampire was standing right infront of your freezer looking for something. With all of the strength you could muster up, you swung the pan down right on his head, no doubt strong enough to give anyone a major concussion. Immediately, he fell to the ground, as lifeless as he wouldn’t be if he wasn’t a vampire.
“Holy shit…” You breathed out, shoulders high and tense. Looking down at him, you noticed how young he looked, and in all honesty, he didn’t look threatening at all. You felt a tinge of worry, wondering if he wasn’t a vampire after all, and you might’ve just killed him.
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So that’s how you find yourself here and how you might met the love of your life.
Edging closer to the man, you bent down to see if he was breathing. He was completely still. That didn’t tell you much, though, as he could be dead or…the undead.
Thank god you had a basement here, especially if anything like this happened. I guess following your dad's steps really helped you out. Which was why it was the best place to drag the vampire into. Maybe you could keep him in there and question him on how the hell he got into your house, and at the same time, you could keep him at a safe distance from yourself.
He was much heavier than you thought he was, but you guessed that came from his height. He was still unconscious but you guessed that it wouldn’t be for long. Suddenly, two large hands grabbed the rusted metal bars from inside of the room and you screamed as his face had come into view like a jump scare.
“Get me out.”
You backed up from the window as far as you could, going to the other side of the room. You didn’t know why you were so scared, mainly because he was behind a locked door. You guessed that despite whatever vampire strength he had, he couldn’t get himself out.
Maybe it’s the hit on his head still playing games? The metal bars your dad gave you for this?
“What are you doing? Let me out!” He frowned. “Why did you put me in here?”
“W-why are you in my house?” You asked him. He didn’t say anything for a second.
‘’Ah.. shit.’’ Right, the blood bags. “Bitch, I was hungry!” He yelled back, making you recoil. Did he just call you a bitch? “That’s why I’m here, because I was hungry and I thought that maybe I could steal some of the blood bags you have.’’
‘‘Have you been stalking me?!’’ How does this vampire know about the blood bags?!
‘‘Uh-... no?... Yes.’’
You sighed. “Do you have anywhere else to go?”
“No…not really.” He said as if he was embarrassed. “I decided to drop out of college when I turned, so I can’t go back on campus.”
 “You can stay here if you want.” You didn’t exactly feel sure about him staying here, but he might help you with your research. He’s still a vampire after all… he’s a threat. But fuck it, that's how you learn new things. You asked for his name after you told yours.
‘‘Okay… Gojo Satoru. But you have to stay in there for a while, until I trust you.’’
“What about when I’m hungry?” He asked.
“I’ll figure that out’’
“What about when I’m lonely?”
“...’’
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The faint sound of Gojo calling in your name woke you up. 
“What the fuck…?” You frowned, squinted eyes getting used to the sunlight. “Oh my fucking gosh.” You quickly got up from your bed, putting on your slippers, and stumbling out of your room, barely able to walk in a straight line. You stomped your way down two flights of stairs until you were met with Gojo holding on to the bars again. “What?!”
“Hi.” He greeted you. “It’s tomorrow, right? I can’t really tell since I’ve been locked in a basement of a dungeon with no light. But if it’s tomorrow, can I have a blood bag? It’s been weeks since I’ve eaten.’’
‘‘And why haven’t you eaten? There’s literal stores for you, vampires!’’
‘‘Ah.. well… I don’t like those.’’
‘‘What?...’’ You looked at him in disbelief for a few seconds. “You woke me up at 7 in the morning for a blood bag?”
“In my defense, I didn’t know it was 7.” He shrugged. You opened up the door of the cell, walking up the stairs, still tired from waking up only ten minutes ago. You heard him follow you, steps surprisingly light for someone as tall as he was.
He started looking around your house, kinda creepy for a vampire if you keep looking at weapons for them.
‘‘Um.. Are you a vampire hunter?’’
‘‘Yes.’’
He chuckled at your answer and sat on top of the table. ‘Why? Weren’t they banned like years ago? Humans even live with vampires, that’s silly from you.’’
‘‘Maybe I wouldn’t be silly if your kind didn’t killed my dad.’’
.... Shit. Maybe you shouldn't have said that.
‘‘Oh... I’m sorry.’’
You sighed, he didn’t mean it in a bad way, he shouldn’t receive this type of behavior from you.
‘‘It 's… okay. I’m not a vampire hunter like it, i’m more like a vampire examinator?’’ Well, you didn’t even think about that one before, if you didn’t want to kill vampires why are you doing this?
You handed him a blood bag from the freezer, watching his eyes light up made you slightly smile, he’s kinda cute. You woke up from your trance and slightly shook your head away from those thoughts.
“Remember not to rip it open and spill it.” You said. “Especially not on these old floors, it’ll soak right in.”
“Oh…right.” He said, twisting open the nozzle and drinking from there. You watched him down it in less than thirty seconds, his brows furrowed in concentration. After he was done, he set it down on the counter.
‘‘Uh.. Can I stay again tonight?... I can sleep on the floor again!’’
....
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One night turned into two nights, and two nights turned into a week, and a week, turned into a month.
You found yourself smiling at him, not noticing how used to him you’ve gotten. He was very peculiar in the least, but you guessed that was mainly because of him being a vampire. You found yourself wondering what he was like when he was a human. It was weird to know that the two of you were always in such close proximity without knowing it. Maybe it was fate. You snapped back into reality once he smiled at you, and you didn’t even think to return the smile. Instead, you looked down at your hands, picking at your nails as if you were busy. Honestly, you were embarrassed to get caught looking at the handsome vampire with boyish charm.
“Y'know…you’ve been holding out really well, so far.” You told him. “You have even helped me with my researches, nothing that I didn’t knew about, but still helped me confirm me”
He turned to look at you. “Really?” He asked, eyes brightening up a little.
“Really.” You nodded with a smile, and he lazily smiled back. “So, I’ve decided to give you a little present.”
“A present? What is it?” He asked curiously, words muffled by the fact that he was still entranced by the tv and some vampire supplement you bought for him 
“Guess.” You told him, feeling a bit mischievous. “I’ll give you a hint. It’s almost like…Why did we meet in the first place.”
“Hm?” He tilted his head to the side. “I’ve never hit you with a pan though? Or have I?” He furrowed his eyebrows in thought.
You rolled your eyes. “Don’t think too hard, you even called me bitch for it’’
“But I really can’t think of anything?” He said. “Can you just give me it? I’m not good at this guessing game…”
“Satoru…” You sighed, something was happening to you, on him... leaned towards him, softly caressing his cheek and giving him a small peck. That wasn’t the surprise, and you were as surprised as him when you did that. It’s just that his eyes looked so beautiful, his messy hair covering his forehead, and his cheeky smile while watching some shitty show on the tv... He froze in surprise, enough to not be able to kiss you back. 
“Oh…” He chuckled nervously, and you swore something on him changed the moment he looked right into your eyes again. ���Can you maybe do it again?” He asked.
You responded with another kiss, one that he had returned this time, except for more fervor. It was like he was waiting to kiss you, dreaming about your lips on his. Did this mean…that you felt the same? Were you as infatuated with him as he was to you? He doubted that it was possible. All without you knowing, he might’ve fallen in love. Falling in love with a vampire, what they trained you hate most...  It only had to be fate that brought you two together.
“I really like you.” Gojo blurted out once you two parted.
“Do you mean that?” You asked him, slight insecurity peeking out from your otherwise hard shell. “I doubt you’ve met very many people in your life.”
‘‘Oh I have, but no one could compare to you sugar.’’ His lips attached to yours again, it’s like he was waiting for this moment his whole life.
¨S-satoru, wait!¨ He immediately stopped his actions, looking worried and for any kind of threat in you.
‘‘That wasn’t the surprise, you can try human blood again.’’
‘‘You got new blood bags? That’s amazing!’’ He was about to stand up from the couch when you stopped him sitting down on his lap, which made him froze.
‘‘I mean it's like… human, human. You can try my blood.’’
‘‘What?'' Silence passed.
''Are you sure? You’re not going to kill me or something right? I’ve seen those knifes you have in the basement and that could sure even kill Dracula.’’ You nodded and laughed at what he said.
He gulped, dark red eyes honing into the beating vein on the left side of your neck. He hesitantly bent down, nose to your neck as he took a big whiff of your sweet blood. He shut his eyes, fighting off the instinct to groan at just how good you smelled.
You chuckled at his reaction, ‘‘I mean it Satoru, this is me saying I like you too. I trust you.’’ With one more second of hesitation, he bit into your neck with his sharp fangs, and you felt a sharp pain. Your grip on his shoulders got tighter as you tried to distract yourself from the pain.
He couldn’t stop the moans of satisfaction at the magnificent taste of your blood, and you gradually noticed that something felt weird. You still felt the pain on the bite, but Gojo’s demeanor changed. It was almost as if he was enjoying it too much. His hands were grabby, not only on your hips, but in your waist and your bottom, and you gasped in surprise.
You started to notice what was going on when you felt how hard he was, his bulge pushing into your stomach.
¨’Toru…?’’ You breathed out, feeling light headed. He moaned, suddenly grinding his lower half into you. He then retracted his fangs, looking at you with wide, lust blown eyes, your blood dribbling down his chin.
“I’m s-sorry-“ He whined, placing you on the counter and rutting himself into you. “I’m so sorry, I-I don’t mean, to, I can’t help it-“ He broke out into an erotic moan, and despite how lightheaded and out of it you were, it aroused you to no end.
You assured him it was okay, looking into his eyes, you could find lust, but mostly embarrassment from it. You didn’t know that he could get this worked up from his own bloodlust, but you weren’t complaining. The only thing you had a problem with was the fact that there were too many clothes separating the both of you, but you didn’t think neither of you were in the right minds to seperate and take each article off.
“Can I be inside of you?” Gojo asked in between harsh breaths. “Please, please, please, I want to so bad-“ It was almost as if he was in pain, rutting into you so hard that you bounced on top of his lap each time. You nodded your head aggressively, opening your legs so you were caging his. You were wearing black leggings, and you thought that they’d be quick and easy to take off, but Gojo instead decided to rip them down the middle, doing so with ease.
“Satoru…!”
“Sorry! It’s just… I can’t take it any more baby..” He apologized over and over again, even as he released his cock from its confines, holding the thick base in between a shaky fist. He moved your panties to the side and slid in with one thrust. The both of you whined loudly at that, and he couldn’t wait any further before he started pounding into you with fervor. You heard the sound of your wet heat, but you didn’t care, mouth agape in a silent scream as he pounded into you with no remorse.
Well…some remorse. He couldn’t stop apologizing as he fucked into you, begging for you to forgive him for being so dirty and succumbing uncontrollable urges.
You yelped as he picked you up from the back of the couch, holding you in his arms as he dropped you on his cock over and over.
“Fuck!” You cursed. “M-more, more-“ You chanted, feeling his cock deep inside of you. You saw tears start to slide down his cheeks and he cried with pleasure. You clenched around him, wanting to see him unravel even more, which made him fuck you on his cock even faster, using you like a rag doll. His vampire strength had kicked in once he drank your sweet blood, something that he was afraid he’d get addicted on since he tasted you for the first time.
He was addicted to your warmth, your lips, your blood, and especially the way your pussy just sucked him in, holding tight and never letting go
“F-fuck, ‘toru, I’m cumming!” You moaned, your pussy convulsing around his cock and making him go crazy. You came around him, eyes rolling to the back of your head. He nearly slammed you into a wall, fucking you roughly, the slick from your cum making it easier to slide in and out of you.
You were extremely overstimulated, your abused pussy needing a break, but Gojo couldn’t stop. He let out nearly pornographic moans as he fucked you through yet another orgasm, not even noticing exactly what you were going through.
You just had to sit there, his cock inside of you, moaning his name again and again., taking just what he needed to give you.
“Oh fuck, (Y/N)-“ He whined, more tears spilling out of his eyes. You were out of it, dazed and cock drunk. “I’m gonna cum— ah!” He mewled out as he finally came, stilling inside of you as he filled you up. His legs shook as he shut his eyes tightly in pleasure.
After he finally calmed down, it was as if he returned to his senses. He quickly pulled out, immediately apologizing as you winced. He gently put you down, but your knees buckled, almost dropping to the floor, yet he caught you.
“(Y/N), I’m so sorry-“ He said, putting his softening member back in his pants. “I can’t believe I just did that to you, I really didn’t mean to, are you okay?“
“‘Toru, I’m fine.” You said to him, holding onto him tightly so you wouldn’t fall. You were still a bit lightheaded, but you were able to reassure him. “I didn’t expect it, but I’m really okay.”
“You shouldn’t have let me drink from you.” He said, tears still falling. “I’ve ruined everything, how could I get so out of-“
You interrupted him with a kiss to shut him up.
“Listen, ‘toru…” You said softly, the nickname making him calm down a bit. “You did nothing wrong. At all. I am more than fine. In fact…I really liked it.”
You watched as his ears got red. “Y-you liked…that? Did I not hurt you?”
You shook your head with a chuckle. “No. In fact…you made me feel really…really good.” You smiled, making him get even more flustered. “I’m just kind of tired. As good as you made me feel, you wore me the hell out.”
“I can carry you to your bed.” Gojo said, quick to pick you up. she then noticed your ripped leggings and destroyed panties. He gulped, feeling even more sorry. “And I can help you change into clothes that aren’t ripped…”
¨What if I tell you I want another round?¨
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hotpinkstars · 4 months
Text
-> shenhes reaction to different love languages
synopsis -> how shenhe reacts to different love languages. pretty self-explanatory.
w/c -> 1.5k
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-> quality time
as we all know, shenhe is certainly not one who knows love. so when you first introduced the topic of quality time to her, she just kind of cocked her head and looked at you. she was someone who quite literally needed assistance to keep her homicidal nature at bay, and you were someone who could barely harm a flee. why ever would you want quality time with her, she thought? although the both of you are a couple, she won’t ever understand all of that stuff that normal couples do. 
it takes a minute or two (more like a couple futile attempts) to get her to open up to spending a lot of time like that with you, but once you get her to maybe get a bite to eat at a cuisine in the harbor, she warms up to the idea a little bit more. she still doesn’t understand why couples like to do this- she was put under the impression of relationships being kissing, hugging, and sleeping together. 
soon enough, she’ll be the one to request to do some of these things that you showed her. depending on how much she wants it, you might have to take the hint, or she’ll just blandly tell you directly. 
“i would like to grab a meal in liyue harbor like we did last week.”
“shenhe, it’s two in the morning… but as soon as the sun rises, sure!” 
well, she’s sure got the spirit!!
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-> words of affirmation
the first time you even said something as simple as “i love you so, so much,” this woman kind of just froze and asked you to repeat that. 
she doesn’t get it. she probably asked you why people say that at first, and then she got it. she already kind of knew, she just wanted to be sure she heard you right. and that she did. a few minutes after you said that to her she could feel a nice warmth in her chest and a little grin coming onto her face. 
even things such as “i love the way you did your braid today!” make her feel so grateful that she was able to date someone such as you. sometimes cloud retainer wonders what's got her in such a good mood these past few months, considering how sour she sometimes can be.
another one she tries to reciprocate once she gets used to it. (spoiler alert: she does it for all of these lol.) she’ll sometimes tell you that you look particularly nice that day. in her eyes, you look glamorous every day, but she saves that for when you two go to a fancy restaurant and you’re all dressed nice.
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-> acts of service
acts of service for shenhe seem pointless in her eyes at first. she has learned to take care of herself, why should she need someone else to do the things she does for own good for her? she can make her own bed, she can put toothpaste on her own toothbrush, and she can cook her own meals. so, when she first saw that the bed was all made, the pillows were fluffed, and there was already toothpaste on her toothbrush from when you were last in there, she seemed a little.. shocked? it was very hard to tell what she felt, but she felt, once again, a warmth in her chest. she came out of the room to ask you about it, and saw you making breakfast. 
“well, i just decided maybe you’d like it! if you don’t, i can stop…” 
“well… i.. really like this.. act of kindness. but i do not know if i understand it yet.”
you laughed and motioned for her to sit down as you served two plates and decided to chat her up a little bit about what you were going to do that day. she ate her food with a small smile, and engaged in the conversation. 
sometimes, she’d come home to find little samples of some foods she likes with a little note on the side of the plate saying something like “i made something i picked up on you liking. i hope you enjoy it!” 
this was one she decided to take little steps to show. she’d do basics that she didn’t even realize she was doing before, like tidying up the room a little bit or putting the dishes away or folding the blankets. all she knew is that it made you happy to see the house so nice and clean, so she continued to do it whenever she was available to. 
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-> receiving gifts
talk about something she isn’t all that familiar with.
the first time you put a little trinket in her hands- for instance, a keychain, she just looked at you curiously. 
“what is this?”
“oh, nothing really. i just thought it would be cute to dangle from your vision. see, it even matches your hair color!”
she handed it back to you and told you to hook it somewhere on her vision. she looked at it with a mirror and a kamera, smiling gratefully, even though she didn’t think it was all that necessary. she got used to your constant gift giving though, and, once again, didn’t understand what the occasion was, she still cherished them silently. the first time you gifted her something bigger, like maybe a pair of heels, she thought she missed something.
“y/n, what is this for? is there some occasion i am not aware of? it’s not your birthday, or my birthday, or our anniversary… is it maybe a holiday?”
“nope!” you replied. “just saw them on sale in liyue. i bought them because they looked like they matched your style!” 
she took another good look at these and put them in the closet. you saw her wear them with her combat outfit a few days later, indirectly trying to show them off to you.
she’ll try and get you gifts too, but she’ll go to the traveler or cloud retainer for help. the traveler has met you a few times, so he/she probably knows what you like just based off of how much shenhe talks about you, and just by your bubbly personality. 
paimons always the one bringing the gift idea up to shenhe. if she likes the idea, then the gift will be given to you as early as possible. 
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-> physical touch
if she’s gonna be starved of any of this, it’s gonna be physical touch. she’s gotten a few pats on the head or shoulder by cloud retainer or her fellow adepti companions whenever she’s done something well, but that’s the extent of it. she has never been tackled to the bed and cuddled before, she’s never really been hugged, and she certainly hasn’t slept in the same bed in a super touchy manner with anyone else before you. 
the first time you rolled over to her side of the bed and latched onto her back, sliding your arms around her waist and propping your head on her shoulder, she was understandably stunned. at first, she tried to pull away, but you wouldn’t let her. so, she was stiffer than a board the rest of the night to be careful not to roll on top of you, and immediately brought it up to you in the morning. you told her it’s just what you do, and was always what you did since you were a child- you felt the need to constantly hug something in your sleep, and you decided to hug her. she just slightly nodded, still not understanding, and walked away for a little while to process what happened the night before. 
she’ll eventually be much more open to the idea of allowing you to rest on top of her or hugging her, still being fairly stiff. but the first time you asked her to rest her head on your chest, she declined, saying she was “too strong and could potentially cut off your airways if she wasn’t careful.” you brushed that thought off and slightly begged her until she sighed and very slowly let her weight fall onto your body. she genuinely liked the way this made her feel, and continued to do it much more often- when she was sad, upset, stressed, or just felt the need to lay on your chest for a few minutes.
when it came to hand-holding or hugging, she wasn’t opposed. she just made a strict rule that there is no hugging or cuddling in public. you agreed, and only did those things when you both knew that there was privacy. the last thing the both of you wanted was to scare each other off. that would be crushing to both ends.
 she was much more open to cuddling and hand holding and all that comes with it later into your relationship- you realized she was a woman who needed an indescribable amount of patience, and that you were willing to give.
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eyesxxyou · 11 months
Text
that's what they all say pt.3 (finale)
↳ ❝ [dbf!miguel o'hara x black!reader] ¡! ❞
rating. m
word count. 5k
synopsis. you wish your father would stop making you be near miguel but when you arrive at his house to drop something off, you meet the most important person in his life
or
you and miguel finally get together
warnings. p in v sex, unprotected sex (stay responsible), creampie, breeding/pregnancy kink, oral (f receiving), Miguel's ready to wife you up, sweet little Gabriella, Miguel being so father, Lyla's here! I also changed it so that Miguel's ex-wife is dead instead of them being divorced because I could. Let me know if I missed anything!
tags: @ihateuguys @chshiresins @futuristicpandakid
part 1 | part 2
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It’s been all of a week since the gala and you were right, things with you and Nathan didn’t work out. You had broken up with him the very next night and of course, it didn’t feel good but you thought it better to end it now before he thought things were getting serious. Then the slew of curses came from him ranging broadly from calling you a “fucking bitch” to telling you that “you’re not even that pretty anyway”. All the usual bullshit.
It was no chip off your shoulder all in all.
It has, however, been growing more and more difficult to be around your father. You’ve fucked Miguel twice now and he was absolutely none the wiser. Someone so technically smart but when it comes to everything else he was completely unaware. All the while, he spoke more and more fondly of his friend. “Miguel” this, “Miguel” that, “that man is a genius!”
‘Yeah, so smart I bet his head game is insane”, you think to yourself, hating yourself for it. But you smile all the same at yourself because it’s a joke for you and only you.
Don’t get yourself wrong though, you are on no good terms with Miguel despite the angry sex you two had in the bathroom of the gala. When you left him in the bathroom, you went to sit back down with your father and Nathan just as dinner was being served. Miguel didn’t return until maybe 10 minutes later, a thin sheet of sweat on his neck, his hair haphazardly restyled, and his once neat bowtie a bit uneven. There was no way he could come back to the party the way you left him, still hard and aching.
He ended up jerking himself off, his cock still slick with your essence. Was it shameful? Yes, utterly embarrassing too. His hand gripped the counter so hard, his hand stroking his length fast and hard with his eyes closed, trying to imagine you right there with him. God, your smell was still on his fingers and it was driving him crazy.
You didn’t spare him a single look the rest of the night and it drove him absolutely mad. You knew it too. That’s why you did it.
Anyways, spending your day running errands and doing chores for your father was not how you’d like to be spending a day off from your demanding job but you knew if you weren’t there to take care of him, he’d be wasting away in his own filth because he cares only about his career. You’ve been cleaning up the small amount of clutter he had around when he comes out with a metal box.
"I need you to take this to Miguel for me."
You immediately retract at the idea. "And why can't you do it? I'm already cleaning your house. Why don't you have a robot maid to do this anyway?" You know he's just too caught up in his own thing to do such a thing. You think you might gift him one to save yourself the energy.
"One, because I'm working on something incredibly important right now and I'm wasting precious time just by talking to you right now. Two, why would I do that when I have you?" He cracks a joke that doesn't even begin to bring a smile to your face but he brushes off your downer mood. "Look, Miguel and I are working on DNA splicing and he needs this sample ASAP. It's very important he gets it. I need you to take it because I don't trust anyone else with it."
You look at the box, your lip curling with the beginnings of a "no" but you know better than that. "I don't even know where he lives."
"Already sent you his address."
You try to find another way to avoid him. "Can I just leave it on his doorstep?" And the disappointment is palpable as your father shakes his head. "Nope, needs to be taken directly from your hands into his." His eyes narrow as you sigh. "Why are you so reluctant to go? You've never had a problem with Miguel before. You two are always messing around."
'Oh you wouldn't know the half of it, dad.'
"It's nothing. I'm just tired, that's all. I'll take it to him." It would be quick, in and out, you'd barely exchange a word, so much as a glance. 
Saying that you'll take it and actually taking it were two entirely different beasts. The first thing you thought standing outside of his house was that his home was distinctly him, overly geometric, sharp edges and corners but with a surprising amount of large windows, all tinted with reflective sheeting making it impossible to see inside. What if he already saw you? What if he was standing there, looking out of one of those windows at you standing at the end of his driveway? The thought terrified you.
You approached the front door and jammed your finger at the doorbell. Oddly enough, there was no chime. To your surprise, a small hologram of a woman appeared in front of you. She wore a large, white, fur coat and pink, heart-shaped glasses. Her smile was broad. “And who are you?”
“Y/N. I’m here to drop something off to Miguel.”
“Ohhh so you’re Y/N!” She suddenly appeared on top of the box, sitting with her legs crossed in front of you. “Oh you have put Miguel through it. I’ve never seen him so stressed over one person. How’d you do it?” You never expected Miguel’s virtual assistant to be so forward.
“I-”
And then the front door swung open and the hologram glitched away. You expected to see Miguel’s towering frame in the door but it’s not there; instead, your eyes catch sight of a little girl maybe 9 or 10 years old looking up at you with big, brown eyes. It’s absolutely unmistakable that she is Miguel’s daughter. She looks just like him. “Who are you?” Her voice is sweet and small, timid even.
You smiled softly and knelt down in front of her, setting the box down beside you. “I’m Y/N, a friend of your dad’s.” You offer out a hand to her and she takes it, shaking firmly. “I’m Gabriella everyone calls me Gabi though.” She came out of her shell so quickly, smiling just like her dad. It warmed your heart.
“Lyla, I told you not to let Gabi open the door.” You could hear Miguel’s voice approaching from around the corner. He was in a black shirt that hugged him in all the right places and gray sweatpants hanging just at his hips. He was rubbing a towelette down his face, wiping off messily done makeup undoubtedly done by the unstable hands of his daughter.
Miguel saw you and paused for a moment. “Y/N?” He began to wipe his face harder. “Gabi, mija. You need to get ready. Your friend will be here soon.” He had a few remnants of glitter in the corners of his eyes that he missed and his lips were still slightly stained cherry red. Gabriella turned to her father. “I already got all my things together, Papa.”
“Do you have all of your soccer stuff together?” He asks and she nods vigorously. “Knee pads?” Again she nods. “Shin guards?” Gabriella wraps her arm around his leg. “Papa, I have everything. You already checked my bag twice.” Miguel sighed and gently patted her head. He looked to you again as you grabbed the handles to the sealed metal box and stood once more.
“I’m just here to drop this off.” You place the box inside beside his door, too uncomfortable to dare yourself to take a step inside. “I’ll take my leave now.”
“Hold on.” Miguel was quick to say. He had you here, at his house, for the first time ever. “Can we talk for a minute?” His eyes are soft, a bit pleading.
You look at Gabriella and think about how you don’t want to start anything in front of his daughter. You hesitate, chew softly on your lip. “Yeah, sure.” You come inside, pick up the box so you can hand it off to him.
You don’t like being so close to him. You hate the way his fingers graze yours has he takes the box from you. “Thanks,” he mutters, setting the box down on his coffee table. He tapped the table and it lit up with a screen. “Lyla, make sure this box remains secure until I pick it up again.” The holographic woman from before showed up like she was laying on top of the table. “Got it, Miguel and Gabi’s friend is pulling up.” She points to the door before disappearing again.
Gabriella grins and runs off to go get her things so she can go and for the first time, you and Miguel are alone again. You don’t look at each other, both trying to find something to say in the moment. All you really wanted to do was leave. You felt like you were intruding on something deeply personal. You’re in his home. His daughter is here. This is his whole life right here.
“Is it always this chaotic here?” Your voice breaks the silence. You feel like it’s too loud. Why are your ears ringing?
A small smile creeps onto Miguel’s lips. “No, not usually. Gabi’s just excited to go to her friend’s house.” His smile faded softly and cleared his throat. He turned his whole body to you, broad shoulders sloping to a small waist. God, you loved his body. “Y/N-”
“Papa, I’m ready!” Gabriella came bouncing downstairs with her duffle bag, ready to run off with her friend. She runs to her father and he catches her, lifting her with an exaggerated groan. “Oh, you’re getting so big, mija. Soon I won’t be able to carry you around.” You doubt that much, with how large he was. He could probably pick you up as you were now.
You see how gentle he is with her, how soft his voice is, how he holds her like she’s the most precious thing in the world.
“Are you still coming to my soccer game tomorrow?” Gabriella asks him, her lips forming into a small pout as her hands grasp at his shirt. Miguel’s eyes softened. “Of course, mi amor. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” Your heart warmed as he peppered kisses across her face and she let out a series of squeals and giggles. As much as you told yourself you hated him, he was a wonderful father and it was clear he adored his daughter. What a lovely little girl too.
He set her down and Gabriella looked up at you. “It was nice meeting you!” God, she was adorable. You smiled at her with a small hint of maternal kindness. “It was nice meeting you too, Gabi.”
She runs off out the door and Miguel follows her, seeing her off out the door before closing it. He sighed softly and looked back at you as you gaze around at his house. It’s decorated with a lot of pictures of him and Gabriella but none with a wife or girlfriend. Is that why he and your father are such good friends? Single fathers in their own ways whether it was by divorce or death. You’re too scared to touch anything, not knowing what’s a screen or not or what might activate Lyla.
“I think we need to talk about things.” Miguel begins with hesitation laced up in his voice, not knowing if this would spark an argument between the two of you. You squirm in your own skin. “I don’t know if there’s anything to talk about. I don’t know if you’ve finally decided where you stand but I know where I do.” You know the truth. The slightest push to sway you and you might come back around. You wanted him badly every single time you saw him. You always wanted his lips on yours, wanted his hands on your waist.
“I made my decision.”
You raise a brow at him, your arms crossing tightly over your chest as if to protect yourself from him. “Oh? And what is that?”
Miguel bites the inside of his cheek, his teeth clawing at the soft flesh. “I want you.” It took very little thought to come to that conclusion after the gala. He looked up at you while you were riding him and only thought that he wanted your face to be the first he sees when he wakes up and when he goes to sleep at night. He likes the way you feel in his hold, how you smell, how, for the first time since his fiance's death giving birth to Gabi, he thinks he could be happy with someone.
You hum like you’re not impressed. You tell yourself that you’re not going to give in so easily, he has to try harder than just that. You keep your back turned to him, not hearing how he approached so quickly and quietly. “Mía Carina, please.” His hand is suddenly on your waist, his fingers dipping into your flesh as he pulls you towards him
“What do you want me to say, Miguel? You want me to just fall into you and tell you I want you too?” You turn to look up at him and find that he’s much closer than you expected. “It’s going to take a lot more than just that.” You can see the way his mind whirls on his face as he thinks of what to do to get you to understand just how much he wants you and everything that comes with you.
You don’t expect him to get down on his knees in front of you, his hands on your hips as he pulls you close and presses his face into your stomach. “You don’t understand, mía carina. I want you. I want you and all the consequences that come along with it. Fuck– let your dad hate me, I don’t care. Please, Y/N. God, you don’t even know.” His voice strains as he looks up at you. He can see that he’s getting to you. The confliction on your face gives you away.
“You told me I was too young.” All you can think about is that first night. The idea of the two of you being together did seem a bit ludicrous but the way things fell apart that night.
“Baby-” Miguel’s hands gripped tighter. “What was I supposed to say? I’m in my 40s now. I have a daughter and you’re just beginning your life. I didn’t want you to be stuck with me and all these responsibilities.”
“That wasn’t for you to decide, Miguel.”
He kisses along the waistline of your pants. The softness of his lips grazing your hips sends a shiver skidding down the length of your spine. “You’re right and I’m sorry, muñeca.” His fingers slip beneath your shirt. “Please forgive me. Let me make it up to you.” His hands trace along the slopes of your body, the dips and curves that he so badly wants to commit to memory. “Lemme make it up to you, my pretty girl.”
He wraps your arms around your thighs and stands up, tossing you over his shoulder with ease. You squeal with surprise. “Miguel, what are you doing?” You hit his back but it has little to no effect on him.
“I told you, I’m gonna make it up to you.” He began to carry up upstairs to what you could only assume was his bedroom. You figured there wasn’t anything you could do about the situation at this point and that you might as well enjoy the ride and the amazing view of his ass.
He took you into his room and laid you down rather gently on his neatly made bed. Miguel stood above you with his hips between your legs. You made a motion to sit up but he shook his head with a disapproving click of his tongue. “No, you don’t do a thing. You’ll be a real muñeca now, won’t you?” His fingers play with the button on your jeans before undoing the fixture.
Miguel took his sweet time getting your clothes off, starting with your shoes and socks then continuing with your pants. He kissed your pelvis as he removed your underwear, this time keeping it intact. His kisses are wet, gentle, and teasing as he maintains eye contact all the way through. He leaves marks where his lips meet your skin, littering you with blossoming red marks all across your stomachHe takes your shirt next and finally your bra, leaving you completely bare before him.
Miguel’s large hands come to fondle your breasts, squeezing and manipulating the soft, malleable flesh against his warm palms. He thinks about how nice you’d look with swollen, tender breasts ready to feed his child. God, now he was thinking about impregnating you. Making his family all the bigger.
You’re so soft, every part of you drives him up the wall. He nudged the bulge of his cock against your core, feening to be inside you. “So pretty.” He murmured. “Mi linda muñeca. So beautiful.” Miguel trailed his fingertips along your body, between your breasts, down your diaphragm and naval and smiled at the way your body reacted so violently to his touch. He got on his knees at the end of his bed, placing either of your legs over your shoulders. You tremble as his large, calloused hands gripped and massaged the soft flesh of your thighs.
Miguel began his descent with a few kisses at your knees, slowly trailing his lips across the sensitive, supple flesh of your inner thighs. His breath is hot and each exhale builds an anticipation that begins to grow unbearable.
"Miguel please." You whine, desperate to know all he can do with that tongue of his. His teasing was killing you slowly and softly, the more torturous way to go. And how can he refuse you when you sound so pretty like that for him? He nipped at your thighs a little more, growing closer and closer to your wanting cunt growing wetter for him by the moment.
Finally, he kissed the slickened lips of your pussy. A sloppy, wet kiss with his tongue circling your swollen clit. Miguel spat on your pussy and watched it pool at your entrance. He put his fingers in the mess of it, humming softly as he eased his middle finger into your wanton hole. You whine again, buckling your hips down because his pace is excruciatingly slow.
Miguel placed his hand on your pelvis to keep you still. “Be patient for me. Can you do that for me, mía carina?” He fucks his middle finger into you a couple times before pushing his index finger in with it. His digits were long and thick, pushing and curling and massaging your silky walls in search of that soft spot that could have you crumbling in seconds.
His tongue was on your rosebud again, lips latched and suckling while his tongue flicked against the little bundle of nerves. Miguel kept his eyes on you, watching the way your face contorted. Your brows pinched with concentration and your lips parted to let a few strangled moans escape. Your fingers were in his hair, grasping at his soft curls. “Just like that– God…oh fuck, Miguel!” His fingers were pumping in and out fast and hard. Your heels dug into his back and your toes curled with pleasure.
It was almost pathetic how easily he could coax an orgasm out of you. The right stroke of his fingers and swirl of his tongue and he had you seeing stars and left your ears ringing. The building of a climax in the pit of your stomach bubbled like boiling water. You let your eyes close, squeezed them shut to concentrate on that feeling, help build it into something more and let it come to complete fruition.
“Go ahead and cum for me, muñeca. Can you do that just for me?” The low rumble of his voice against your aching cunt was enough to do just that. Your back arched off the bed, your fingers twisted in his hair, tugging at his roots to keep him close. Miguel slips his fingers from your, replacing it with his tongue while his arched nose continues to rub your clit. He liked the taste of you on his tongue, liked bringing you so much pleasure that your muscles spasmed and seized uncontrollably. His fingers massaged your thighs and hips. “Good girl. Mi buena chica.”
Miguel kissed your thighs again, his teeth grazing across your skin as your legs trembled. He was hard now—harder than before at least. His lips were slick with the very thing he hopes no one else in the world will ever get the chance to taste. He stood against, looked down at your little fucked out frame with tenderness. God, he loved you.
“Can you sit up for me, mi alma?” He asks you. You loved how gentle he was being with you and wanted to please him, so you fought against the aftershock of your orgasm and sat up in front of him. Your face was just against his pelvis with the obvious tint in his pants brushing his lips. You grabbed his hips and looked up at him. The valley of his abs and all those muscles.
“You’re such a good daddy, Miguel.” You murmur, kissing the swell while your hands slipped beneath his shirt to caress his muscles. “How sweet you were with Gabriella. I love a man that’s good with children.”
“Oh really?” Miguel bent down at the waist to kiss you, purring softly against your plush lips. “Funny, I was just thinking about how nice and pretty you’d look pregnant and in my bed.” You moaned softly against his lips, your hand stroking the back of his neck. “Miguel.” His large hands were on your breasts again.
“You want to help me make another baby? Make me a daddy again?” His tongue was against yours. “I wanna make you a mommy. WIll you let me do that?” He wanted to cum deep inside you, press his hand against the exterior of your womb and know that his child was growing in there. It might just be a nice little fantasy, hormones running high, but it turned him on. It turned you on too. Birth control in these times meant you couldn’t get pregnant unless you intentionally stopped taking it. No risks involved.
“Yes, please.” You pushed Miguel back so you could stand up. The height difference was much the same but now you were at least at his chest. You looked up at him with wide, pretty eyes and offered him the same human kindness he offered you by removing his clothes. You grabbed the hem of his shirt and helped him take it off before doing the same with his sweatpants and underwear. You realize that for the first time, you two are completely naked in front of each other, bare and vulnerable.
Miguel kissed you again because he simply couldn’t help it. He kissed you because even though it hurt his back to keep bending down like this, he loved kissing you so much that it didn’t matter. He picked you up with ease and walked around the side of the bed to place you further up on it. He climbed up on top of you, caressed the side of your body as he grabbed a pillow.
"How do you want it?" He asked, liking to give you a choice in the matter. You looked at the pillow he was grasping and took it from him. Miguel watched as you lied on your stomach and quickly caught on when you placed the pillow beneath your hips to elevate them. He liked the way you thought.
Miguel mounted the back of your thighs, wrapping his hand around the veiny length of his cock while his other hand pulled your hips up a bit more to expose your tight, wet, little pussy. He tapped the head against your entrance before easing himself in just enough that he no longer needed his hand to guide. He leaned over you, pushing deeper until his hips met your ass flush and everything that made the two of you two separate beings disappeared.
You turned to look back at him from your position and hooked your arm over his shoulder and around his neck to pull him close. His hands were on either side of your body, supporting the both of you. Miguel kissed you and at the same time thrusted his hips sharply into you. “You’ll make such a great mom, mía carina. I’ll put a baby nice and deep in you and we’ll be a happy family.” He rocked his hips, pulling back until just the tip remained positioned against your wonton pussy before sinking back into his own personal heaven.
Miguel wasn’t fucking you. It wasn’t fast or rough or fueled by blatant, blinded lust. His pace was slow and steady, quite nice actually.  Each thrust drew a placid moan from your lips or a whimper of Miguel’s name against his tongue. Thai kind of sex was the baby-making kind of sex. You never had it but you knew it all the same, you could feel it. This was the kind of sex that made his daughter.
“You’ll be such a good mom to Gabriella.” He kissed your cheek, tracing his lips across the curve of your jaw. He hoped saying something like that wouldn’t scare you away because he wanted you to be a part of his family. Gabriella never met her mother, grew up without any semblance of a mother figure at all. At first, it was just because he was heartbroken, freshly widowed, and now with a daughter. Then after a couple years when he thought he might finally be able to get back out there, the occasional date here but no one was allowed to meet his daughter. He didn’t want anyone who wasn’t going to be a lasting part of his life make an impression on her, get her mind going. He was afraid her real mother might be replaced, that Gabriella might be mistaken. So he made sure she knew who her mother was, showed her pictures of her, told her stories, etc.
It’s only been in recent years that Miguel has realized that Gabriella still needed a maternal figure in her life. And trying to find someone willing to step up and raise a kid that isn’t theirs is hard to imagine, no less you, a girl in her 20s with no children of her own and a whole life ahead of her. He wasn’t trying to tie you down like that.
You moan softly, loving the way his body pressed against yours. Your skin stuck to his with the thin layer of sweat that seemed to try and bound you two together. You loved how full you elt, his cock plunging in and out at you in firm, timed strokes. The two of you so desperately clung on to each other like someone was trying to pull you two away from each other.
The way you felt with Miguel was electric, like nothing you ever felt before and you thought that this might actually be love. This could be love right here and that terrified you and excited you. Because you were so in love that you were perfectly happy with the idea of being a close part of his personal life, eventually coming to help parent his daughter at your age.
“I’m close, my love.” Miguel was beginning to lose all sense of self. His breathing began to pick up as his hips buckled a bit faster. “Gonna cum in your pretty little pussy, claim it all as mine.” He sat up finally and suddenly you felt a bit cold without his body on yours. His large hands grasped your hips to keep you still and watched as his cock sank deep into you. God, the way your walls stretched to contain him, gripped him like no other.
You knew he was just on the edge when his hips began to slow into spaced, yet harsh thrusts. “Fuck, fuck, fuck– God.” He choked as his abdomen tightened and he pressed his narrow hips as hard as he could against your ass, pressing himself as deep as he could inside you.
You moan at the feeling of his hot cum filling you, painting your walls in nice, thick spurts. Miguel lets out a low groan, his eyes squeezing shut as you rock back and forth on his dick, milking him for all he had to offer you. There was so much that it began to leak at the corners, creating a milky white ring right at your entrance.
Miguel left you slowly, not truly wanting to leave the soft warmth of your body. Cum immediately began to surface and dribble down the front of your lips. It was quite the sight, such a beautiful one. He just had to take a moment to admire his work.
“You havin’ fun back there?” You ask after a beat of silence. You turn around beneath Miguel and sit up just enough to kiss his chest before he bends down to meet you halfway. His hands come to find purchase on your jaw, his thumbs rubbing circles on your cheekbones. Your smile into the kiss before laughing.
“What’s so funny?”
You stifle your laughter as you pull away from him and lay back down on top of his bedsheets. “My dad is so gonna kill you.” You look up at Miguel as he runs his fingers through his hair and sighs. He came and laid down beside you, wrapping a arm around your waist to pull you closer. “Let’s not tell him just yet. I have to figure out the best way to explain it.”
You roll over and murmur into his lightly hair-covered chest. “I don’t think there’s any good way to explain this to him. Might as well rip the bandaid off while he’s not expecting it.”
“That might be the right move.”
494 notes · View notes
jenscx · 1 year
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FATE — huh yunjin x f!reader
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it’s been two years since yunjin had broken up with you, but fate brings you to korea, and into yunjin’s arms.
TAGS — fluff, angst, exes to lovers, cursing, wanted to write a super angsty one but felt bad for my wife yunjin :((
WORDCOUNT — 2.6k
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yunjin breaks up with you through a phone call. it’s embarrassing, her voice sounding through your phone explaining and rambling while you try your best not to cry in a random starbucks.
“—and it’s not you, like seriously, it’s just our time differences and i can’t be in a relationship if i want to debut.” you grip your phone a little tighter.
“you told me you were going there to visit family. not to debut or even train again,” memories of yunjin reassuring you flash through your head and you can just hear the grimace in her voice.
your girlfriend continues, “i know what i said, it’s just, they asked and this is all i’ve ever wanted.”
“so that text from yesterday was a lie? telling me that you missed me so much and couldn’t wait to come back?” you hiss as quietly as possible, feeling more furious rather than sad at this point.
yunjin goes quiet for a second before sighing, “i do miss you and i miss new york too but i can’t give up on my dream. i’m sorry, y/n.”
you think of your girlfriend’s past endearing words and they only fan the flames burning inside you. ( “y/n? are you still there?” ) and at that moment, you no longer feel any sort of affection for huh yunjin, only disappointment that she lied to you and then broke up with you through a two minute phone call.
“i hope i never see you again, jennifer. bye.”
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it’s been two years since the breakup and you glared at anyone who brought it up. it was a sensitive subject and you would rather spend your time thinking of anything else but yunjin. yet, you feel exhilarated. a sample of your mix had somehow worked its way to hybe and the producers there had reached out to you, an opportunity anyone would give anything for.
a ticket headed to south korea was booked and you stood in the airport, giving your teary goodbyes to your family. you had tried to build up your korean a few weeks beforehand and maybe, you could understand it more than the average foreigner.
after all, if you were to potentially be signed to hybe, you might just end up migrating there and a little korean could help you out.
“be good, i don't want to see my only daughter ending up a prisoner,” your dad says.
you laugh, affronted, “why would i do anything that would warrant jail time?”
he shrugs and you give your parents one final hug before departing for the gates.
excitement fills your veins and you are soon jittering with nervousness. as soon as they announce boarding, you rush onto the plane, a newfound enthusiasm for your future.
maybe you could meet blackpink there, but yg and hybe don’t really collaborate often, you thought.
or maybe if the whole hybe thing doesn’t work out, you could try for the black label and end up producing for somi. that would be fun.
your fantasies entertain you for the rest of the flight and sleep overtakes you at the later part. it is a 14 hour flight after all. you dream of soft brown eyes and even softer black hair.
it’s around 10 o’clock in the morning when your plane lands and surprisingly, you feel well-rested. it’s surreal that you were finally in korea and as you wait for the designated driver to pick you up, a crowd of fans rushes past you, camera flashes going off at lightning speed.
“ah, isn’t that lesserafim? they just came back from japan,” a stranger remarked while passing by. you tense up. the group, lesserafim, familiar yet painful at the same time. you clench your eyes shut, not willing to make any sort of contact with one particular member.
however, your body gravitates towards the crowd and the sight of the group’s success before you grips your heart painfully.
she left for a good cause.
“kazuha! look here!”
“chaewon! chaewon! do a heart with sakura!”
“eunchae-ssi, do a heart!”
just as you’re about to leave, someone calls out.
“yunjin! look here!”
unfortunately, the person who had yelled stood next to you and even though your head was screaming at you to run, your legs stayed rooted and you’re forced to face the girl who had broken your heart.
“y/n?” she mouthed, eyes widening. you pulled the cap on your head downwards and gulped. should i just run and hope she thinks i’m just her hallucination?
unluckily (or luckily for future you), neither you nor yunjin move away and you’re stuck in a staring contest with your ex.
she did nothing and snapped her smiling façade back on her face but her gaze wandered to you occasionally.
you thought back to your words, “i never want to see you again.” yeah, that was how it should be and your body finally cooperated as you pulled yourself out of her trance, away from the crowd.
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you stare at the building, a modern, skyscraper corporate building that spoke of the company’s success.
“hello,” you greet the bodyguards stationed at the front and head in. it was pristine and honestly, you would die to work here every day. there was a cafe and everything, you promised yourself to get a snack later.
“oh, you’re the producer that no joohwan has a meeting with,” the receptionist says, “the twelfth floor, i think he’s in the studio.”
you nod and express your thanks before making your way up. despite the fact that you were about to talk to a hybe producer, your head was filled with thoughts of a particular idol under hybe. her blonde hair and bright eyes… why did she dye her hair? you frowned as the elevator dinged.
you’re greeted with a hallway and multiple doors. the sign above most reading, ‘practice room’ while the door at the end is a different colour.
you knocked and waited a couple seconds before opening it slightly.
a man sat before a layout of buttons and mixers that you were well familiar with and inside the recording booth, a sole girl looking at the lyric sheet.
“oh, hello, i wasn’t expecting you to be so early but come on in. you can take a seat there first while i finish up,” the producer, no joohwan, smiles. you nod and do so, not before recognising the girl inside as lesserafim’s chaewon.
“chaewon-ssi, let’s do the last verse, okay?”
“yes.”
you’re amazed at her voice and the way joohwan moves so fluidly around the mixer. it feels like it’s his second home and it probably was. it was like a performance artwork.
“i think that was good, we can wrap up here today,” joohwan says, “tell yunjin to drop by later, we need to record her verse too.”
even her name urges some sort of reaction out of you and maybe chaewon notices since she raises a questioning eyebrow but doesn’t say anything.
“okay,” joohwan turns to you when chaewon leaves the room, “so, i heard your mix and i think you’re just what our team needs. i think that you bring something new and i want you to work for hybe, or more specifically, source music.”
source music, the company lesserafim is under. you’re now in some dilemma because if you were to reach joohwan’s level, you would have to see the members during recording. the members, including yunjin. your head spins at the opportunity presented, either let your past relationship affect your future or forget about it.
you feel slightly bitter. yunjin chose her work over your relationship. she didn’t let you, no matter how much she loved you, affect her dreams.
“i would love to work for source music.”
you think you’ve made the right choice when joohwan takes your hand into a firm handshake, “i’m glad you chose our company! when i’m done recording with the girls, we can sign you to source music and draft up a contract.”
“okay, i’ll come in next week then?”
“yes, that would be great.” you don’t lie through your teeth when you tell him how much you appreciate the opportunity and joohwan seems genuinely excited for new ideas and samples.
as soon as you open the door however, your smile fades away as a blonde blocks your way.
“oh. you’re… here,” yunjin blinks. seeing her in close proximity brings up a lot of things you want to say to her. for example, you’re still so pretty ranging to i hate you and your stinking guts. but you don’t say any of those. you nod and then try to manoeuvre past her but she’s so much taller and stronger than you that your wrist just ends up in her grip. she drags you away while you struggle in her grasp and only stops when you two are both in an empty practice room, the door swiftly locked by yunjin.
“what are you doing!” you shriek, backing away from your ex-girlfriend but it seems, she has other plans that prevent your escape.
“no, what are you doing in korea?” yunjin retorts, “aren’t you meant to be in new york?”
“i’m here for a job, dumbass, so can i leave now?” you frown, not liking the way yunjin rests her gaze on you.
a moment of silence befalls the two of you, and of course, your temper runs short and it’s another episode of you trying to reach the locked door but yunjin’s arms reach you before you do.
her arms wrap around your waist and you writhe uncontrollably.
“jennifer! let. me. go!”
“no!”
you gasp, “what the hell do you mean, ‘no’!”
“i just wanna talk to you!”
“and i don’t want to talk to you!”
your ex-girlfriend pointedly ignores you until you stop trying to escape, too tired to fight back against the once comfortable embrace you wished for.
you pant, “what?”
“what?”
“what do you want to say? and it’s not nice just grabbing your ex— or anyone, like that!” you scoff.
yunjin releases her grip slightly but not enough for your body to wiggle out. she sits you both on the wooden floor and sighs.
“i…”
“what, jennifer? you wrestle me and then have nothing to say? you better start talking if not i’m leaving in five seconds.”
“okay, this isn’t how i envisioned our first meeting.”
“and i didn’t envision this at all,” you whisper under your breath, rolling your eyes. who the hell fantasises about meeting their ex again?
“can you stop saying shit and just listen?”
“no, jennifer, because you literally just kidnapped me!”
yunjin groans loudly, “oh my god, stop calling me jennifer!” her shout falters you and you stay quiet. a part of you is scared of her anger and another part wants to cry. cry that yunjin’s hold is so, so warm.
you hear yunjin take a deep breath.
“i regret breaking up with you.”
and it’s crazy that you don’t have a snarky remark to bite back. you don’t have any words at all because… well, why would yunjin ever regret that?
it got her famous, rich and her dream that she desired.
you feel her embrace you a little tighter again. at this point, your back was to her chest and she rested her head against your shoulder. it was like you two were cuddling, only that you were deathly upright and still. suddenly you hear sniffles and your shoulder getting wet.
“it was fine at first. i liked being an idol but i just… i’m sorry for leaving you. i was an idiot and i can’t tell you how much i’ve missed you,” yunjin cries into your shoulder, “i was so stupid to break up with the only person that supported me then… and i’m so sorry for being such a dumbass to ever let you go. i wanted to go back to new york and beg for you to take me back—”
“so why didn’t you?” you interrupt.
“i was scared, scared that i might see you with someone new and scared to face you again, but now that you’re here, all these emotions just rush out and fuck, i can’t stop crying. please, please let me try again, i won’t be the same idiot that breaks up with you. i’ll do anything for you, y/n.”
yunjin just sobs into your shoulder and there’s some mumbles that you can’t make out.
“jen,” you mutter softly, “i was so broken when you left me. you lied and then just broke up with me on the spot, and there’s still a little bit of my heart that hates you for it.” your ex-girlfriend’s body tenses up.
“the days after, i waited for any contact with you. maybe you would call, apologise and come back to new york, but a part of me knew that you would never. but i stayed, hoping,” you chuckle, “so much for wistful thinking. you haven’t changed much. but i did.”
yunjin inhales sharply.
“have you… moved on?” you can tell her cheeks are burning red at her curiosity despite her hair hiding her face.
“i could never move on, you know that right? i just had to change to become someone who would survive without you,” you turn around, facing the one that left you heartbroken in a starbucks two years ago. “you left so abruptly and… i can’t just forgive you instantly. also, i meant it when i said it wasn’t nice of you to just drag me in here.”
yunjin pouts, cheeks reddening further, “you would have ran away.”
you pinch her cheeks, “then you can chase me properly this time, instead of leaving again.”
she sighs into her hands.
“i wish i could turn back time and never leave you.”
you shake your head, “i’m still pissed at you. i think i had to change pillowcases every day since i cried into my pillow every time i thought of you.”
yunjin lets out a watery laugh.
“i’m sorry.”
“it’s okay. i became okay.”
“i just,” yunjin stutters, “missed you… way more than i thought. i love you, so much. fuck, why’d i ever think of leaving you?” she says the last part more to herself than you.
“let’s start slow, yunjin,” you offer the girl, who raises her eyebrows.
“yunjin?”
“everyone here calls you yunjin, shouldn’t i do the same?”
“but i like jen…”
you giggle, “okay jen, i’ll give you another chance.”
you swear that yunjin’s face brightens up tenfold when you let those words out.
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lesserafim’s dating ban is lifted after five years. yunjin is more mature and so are you. you had recently celebrated your 27th birthday by flying back to new york (with yunjin tagging along) to visit your family.
after reaching incheon international airport, yunjin takes ahold of your hand and laughs, “this is the first time i saw you since we broke up. it’s so crazy that fate brought you here with me.”
you roll your eyes at her.
“you mean, you broke up with me, don’t make it into a mutual agreement,” you sass.
“yeah yeah, but i wanted to ask you something,” yunjin shifted uncomfortably, “y/n.”
“yes, jen?”
“we should start dating.”
“yeah? that’s not really asking anyway, more like stating,” you say.
yunjin is now the one rolling her eyes.
“is that a yes because i might just start crying.”
you give her silence before bursting into laughter at her worried expression.
“yes, you doofus.”
( “hey jen, you were kind of like joe jonas breaking up with taylor swift when you broke up with me.”
“oh my god, i was joe jonas.” )
743 notes · View notes
gretavanlace · 8 months
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Sugar II (part 2)
18+ only! Minors do not interact!
Warnings: language, angst, Josh is perfect, angst, also maybe some angst
I’m so happy that you are all enjoying Sugar 2.0 as much as I am! I’ve missed this little world so much and it just makes me smile to know that you missed it too ❤️
Curled up into a tight ball under hotel room sheets, your mascara smudges across and stains the bleach-white pillowcases. And you might feel a little guilty about that if you could form a halfway coherent thought.
You’d expected a coworker, also dragged into town for this god forsaken conference, when you’d heard your name skittering across the marbled lobby floors. Turning to find Daniel, dripping in Greek God beauty and memories, had stolen the air from your lungs.
Quite literally, you had found it impossible to breathe for a few panicky moments as your eyes darted around in search of those that might be tagging along with him.
The warm, nostalgic feeling of stumbling across an old, dear friend had been overshadowed and twisted by fear…and a horrible, throbbing sadness; there was a time when this was your life…the last time anything had made any sense.
The overwhelming urge to sob in his arms had left you aching when he’d pulled you in for a bear hug. Somehow, his being so near had made home feel that much further away.
Take me to him. You’d wanted to beg Danny, clinging to his sturdy frame.
Now, you just want to run. To pack up your things in a hurry and flee the building as if it were engulfed in flames. You wish you were shoving your bag into an overhead compartment on a plane bound for anywhere that isn’t here.
This is too close. They are too close.
Three years it’s been, and he is still the first thing that weighs like sand on your mind when your eyes blink open in the morning…and your very last thought before they drift closed at night.
Has it really been three years? It doesn’t seem possible.
You think of Josh, too. Of course you do. But it is with a distant fondness for what you had. He is a pretty memory. A good memory. One you can recall easily, and with wistful affection. You can speak of him readily, with gentle sentiment. It was a great thing you had, and now it is no longer. Simple.
Jake.
You try so hard not to think of Jake, but he’s there all the time anyway. Cozied up inside your head like he owns the place, no matter how many times you’ve ordered him to vacate. He always was stubborn, and his memory has proven no different. There is a hole in your soul shaped exactly like him. Hardly a blip of light in your eyes; you left most of it there with him all those moons ago.
You could so easily satiate your searing need in some minuscule manner, via YouTube interviews, balcony seats at shows where you would stand no chance of being spotted. The wails of his guitar could pour from your speakers and right into your chest whenever it feels too hollow. You could fall asleep to samplings of his velveteen voice, rasping answers to questions floated from radio hosts and devour written pieces where he speaks so eloquently and with such reverence about his craft…
You could, but you don’t.
You do none of these things. It simply cuts too deeply.
Early on, you did. Tortured yourself as you sobbed and cried out in the night like a homesick child. Yes, in those early days, you’d punished your fractured heart and yearning mind with pain; sunk your teeth into and gnashed them together, fearful of letting go.
But you’ve found your way. Tripped clumsily along, patching together a new normal slowly. The diamond that rests upon your ring finger reminds you of that…and you feel sick with self loathing. Weeping in this strange bed over what used to be, while he waits at home for you, happily watering your plants and tending to the household chores. Loving you from a distance.
He sends you texts just to say he loves you, and so you’ll know you’re on his mind. To ask if you’d like him to pick up anything from the store so you won’t have to worry about it when you return home. To remind you that he adores you in a hundred little ways.
…and here you lie, in a bed that isn’t the one you share with him, chest caving in around your heart, squeezed up tight and longing for Jake.
Jake, Jake, Jake…always Jake. Why won’t he go away?
A knock, swift and sure, startles you out of your misery with a jolt.
You don’t plan to answer, that’s a given…you’re a mess, complete with a blotchy, tear streaked face, and swollen eyes…so you’re silent as you creep over to the door to have a peek through the peephole.
He looks angelic, waiting out there in the hall nervously fidgeting. His curls look like home and your fingers itch to touch them, innocently. Almost the same, and so different all at once, now closely clipped at the sides. He looks reminiscent of his younger self. A little like the Josh you’ve only ever known through pictures; the Josh before he swept into your life like a tornado of light and smiles. He always was so beautiful. So offbeat. So eclectically mishmashed together and esoteric.
It’s like spotting a twin flame that you never expected to see again. Like the dead has risen…
…and before you’re consciously aware of your actions, you’re sliding the lock and cracking open the door.
“Hello, sweet girl.” His voice is soothing, and weighed down heavy as it slams into your head and scrambles your brain.
“Josh,” is all you’re able to manage, stupidly.
“As beautiful as ever, mama.” He smiles, flashing that tiny gap in his teeth that used to make you weak.
“Now, listen,” he holds a hand up and then shoes away whatever notion he’s about to bring up, “Don’t you hold this against our dear Daniel…I know you didn’t want to see us,” he lowers his voice into a conspiring whisper, “but you should know, he’s become a terrible tattletale in your absence.”
Suddenly, you’re hyper aware of the fact that you’ve left him standing in the hall like an unwelcome stranger. Against your better judgment, you invite him in.
He’s careful not to touch you, mindful of overstepping in a way that’s so out of character for him it makes you feel unsteady.
“You really do look lovely, sweetheart.” He smiles, “A vision. I’ve missed you, my friend. I’ve missed you very much.”
‘My friend’ stings a little at first, but within a blink, it settles and feels right - you were always friends. Friends before it became love, friends while it was love…
The Josh you knew possessed a great many talents, and quick adaptability was listed among them. He allowed the fickle winds of life to toss him about like no one you’d ever known, and had an ever present and uncannily firm grasp on relationships, and an admiration for how they can shift and morph.
He also always was a cool liar when it was for the greater good. Some things clearly never change.
Nervously, you sweep a hand through your hair and blot your eyes with the backs of your hands, “Lovely my ass…c’mere.”
With little reservation, you tug him in close and fold your arms around him. An unexpected huff of a laugh escapes you when you feel his familiar warmth.
He hugs you back, long and hard, with a soft, “Hi, baby, hi.”
“How’d you find me, you stalker?” You joke tenderly as he sways your bodies back and forth. “I didn’t give Danny my room number.”
That chuckle of his that you’d buried in the past trots out to say hello, “A trip to the front desk was all it took. Have you forgotten the Kiszka charm so easily?”
“Uh-huh,” you roll your eyes, though you’re still wrapped up tightly together and he cannot see.
“Okay,” he concedes “the Kiszka charm and maybe a hundred tucked into a hand or two.”
How strange that you had begged Danny not to tell him; his embrace is blissful and you’ve missed him terribly.
Still, there is a phantom in the room with the two of you, and you know without a doubt that he feels it too.
When he pulls back, his hands slip down your arms to clasp around yours…and he sees it.
“Oh my, mama,” he tugs it up closer for inspection, “would you look at that. Going to the chapel, huh?”
“I—“ for some unknown reason, you pull your hand away and tuck it behind your back as though you’ve been caught in a shameful act.
He tilts his head, regarding you carefully “Can we sit?”
With a welcoming gesture, you usher him in further, and like the gentleman he’s always been, he opts for the chair and doesn’t mention the disheveled bed, or its wept upon pillows.
After you settle in respectively, there’s a long stretch of silence in which you both seem to just sort of sink into being in the same room together again. Finally, he breaks the ice.
“He can’t know you’re here. It won’t be like this,” he waves a finger back and forth between the two of you, indicating the ease in which you’ve reunited.
A choked sob threatens to breach your lips at the mere mention of him, and your hand darts up to press it back.
“And he certainly can’t know about that.” Josh points to your ring winking obnoxiously in the light.
“Of course,” you nod rapidly, blinking tears back. “Yes, of course not…but, is he…” falling silent, your gaze lands on your bare toes and stays there.
“Is he, what?” Josh’s voice is kind, and you are so grateful for it. “Okay? No, sweetheart. He’s very far from okay. I should lie for him, I know I should. He’s my brother…I should tell you he’s happy. Happier than he’s ever been.”
“Will you?” There is a desperate hope in your plea that makes you cringe inwardly. “Will you tell me he’s happy?”
His eyes, so like his twins, and so full of sorrow, watch you for such a long time you begin to squirm this way and that in your seat. “Sit still, mama…” he finally scolds with the tiniest wink to soothe your anxiety, “he’s happy. He’s fine. But best if you just steer clear, alright?”
“So he’s happy? Or you should lie, Josh? Which is it?” Why are you asking? You don’t want to know. It’s infinitely easier to swallow the lie. You can’t stand the thought of Jake broken still and riddled with the pain you know so well.
With a sigh, he avoids your gaze. “You know the answer to that already, it seems. Are you?” His eyes flick towards your engagement ring, “Happy, I mean? Are you?”
Now it’s your turn to lie, “Yes. Very.”
He nods, and then glances at the mascara glaring from your pillows like evidence at trial. “Yes, it would seem so.”
“Josh, I—“
“Look,” he cuts you off, stressing with urgency. “We’re only here for the night. Lay low if you can. He’s bad off, and to see you would level him. To see you with that,” he once again points out your ring, “Would kill him. You leaving…”
A shaking breath rattles his shoulders, “It wasn’t easy for either of us, but Jake? Jake is still in that hotel room you walked out of a thousand nights ago. He never left, sweet girl. He never fucking left…and as much as I know that it’s not your fault…”
He trails off in thought and then drags in a hitching hiss of air, “As much as I know it isn’t either of our faults, I still place all that blame right here, with you and me. I can’t watch him descend any further, alright? So just lay low until we’re gone. For me, yeah?”
“Yeah,” you nod, a thousand questions beating like bird’s wings against the cage of your mind, “Yes, of course.”
Another lull slips in to visit until he shakes his head slowly, “How did I ever manage to get over you? You truly are beautiful. I’d almost forgotten…that’s heartbreaking.”
There is an innocuous lilt to his tone that warms your soul like cocoa with the fattest marshmallow bobbing along in the mug, and you feel your cheeks turn pink under his open, golden gaze.
“Me?” You laugh, “What about you, gorgeous? I love the hair.”
“Oh, you know,” he brushes his palms over the sides with a bashful shrug, “I let Sam trim it, scissors slipped…had to do something.”
“Still blaming Sam for all of life’s tragedies?” You laugh again. You always did laugh so freely with him, and you’ve missed it more than you ever allowed yourself to realize.
He scoffs with the faintest roll of his sparkling eyes “Obviously. That’s what the youngest is for, mama. You know this. And speaking of Samuel, you understand that Daniel will tell him, right? Those two might as well just get married and call it a day.”
Another giggle sounds out of you, “Don’t be jealous, Joshua. It’s unbecoming. Danny loves you, too…and Sammy I would say definitely considers you a solid acquaintance.”
“Yes, well, my acquaintance would be thoroughly crushed if he didn’t get the chance to at least say hello to you. Maybe later tonight? After the show?” He leans forward and toys with the beads swinging between his knees. “How would that be?”
“Only Sammy?”
He holds up two fingers, scout’s honor, “Only Sammy.”
You agree, and catch up a while longer until it’s time for him to take his leave, and you can’t help the confession that blurts out of your mouth without eloquence.
“You said he never left that hotel room,” you waver with bitten back tears. “It wasn’t…I don’t want you to think…it took me a very long time to leave that room, too.”
One last time, before the door closes behind him, his eyes linger on your pillow and the evidence of your tears, and then find yours, “Sweetheart, are you sure you’ve left it at all?”
Taglist: @gretasintrees @greta-van-chaos @celestialfauna @s0livagant @groggyvanfleet @kiszkathecook @brokenbellz @llightmyllovee @doodle417 @seventieswhore @jake-kiszkas-smirk @weightofdreams-gvf @imdepressedaf1996 @alisonwonderland29 @gretavanfleas @jakesgrapejuice @gretavangroove @sparrowofthedawn @xserenax-13 @tbagggvf @obetrolncocktails @jakeslovehandles @poofyloofy @70sgroupielovr @heatmyfleet @age-of-nyahh @sammiboo162 @gretasmokerising @spicedandicedtea @jakekiszkasleftnutsack @saoirsemaeve @mywickeddivinity @thelvnternskeeper @paintmyhouse @tripthelightfandomtastic @tripthelight-fanfic @mckenna4 @sarakay-gvf @theweightofjake @thewritingbeforesunrise @joshsmama @sammysvanfeet @rhythm-of-space @highladyofasgard @jordie-gvf-admin @calumspretty @sad1lynn @demolitionndann @gvfpal @starcatcher-jake
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newtonsheffield · 2 months
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Molly, I think they absolutely redecorate, based on this picture. The woodwork, fluted column, and drapes make me think this is the Bridgerton House Drawing Room, but the leather chair and the red rug were not there before, and definitely feel much more like Anthony and Kate’s style.
And if we’re engaging in WILD speculation: looking at the Season 3 episode list, I might assume that this scene takes place in the episode “Joining of Hands” which is episode 7 of 8, so this makes me think that the the redecorating may be a part of a wider story arc involving Kate stepping into the role of Viscountess and Violet stepping back. (I don’t think it’ll be contentious or anything—quite the opposite actually! I think both women will be loving and supportive throughout one another’s journeys)
And if we want to engage in even WILDER speculation: we could assume that this will culminate in Violet moving out of BH at the end of the season, meaning we might just see her famous Farewell Masquerade, and Benedict’s meeting with his Lady in Silver!!
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What I need is Anthony walking into the room one day to find Kate and Violet entertaining a man who has wallpaper samples strewn about and several heavy rugs.
“Are we…? Redecorating?” Anthony asked a little hesitantly, bending to kiss his wife’s cheek.
“I’m considering it, Darling.” Kate hummed.
“Yes.” Violet said firmly at exactly the same time.
Kate’s lips quirked in a smile as Anthony made his way over to the biscuits set out.
“This is Mr Abbott, Darling. He was just trying to help us choose a rug that might match the wallpaper in your Chambers and something for in here.”
Anthony inclined his head to the man who said “Lord Bridgerton, Good day.”
Anthony looked quickly at the rugs, before he settled beside his wife. Squeezing himself in where there wasn’t room. “Well none of those match the wallpaper.”
Mr Abbott cleared his throat, “Lady Bridgerton had thought, perhaps, to change the wallpaper to something a little brighter. Gold perhaps.”
Anthony raised his eyebrows and the man seemed to shrink back. “Gold?”
“Gold.” Kate confirmed, “Your chambers are a little… dreary, Darling.”
Anthony could feel Kate watching him, waiting for his reaction to the very thing she’d tried to do in their home. He could feel his mother waiting to drag him from the room and likely give him a tongue lashing about how difficult it was for ladies to leave their family homes and try and settle somewhere else. He’d probably get an encore from Daphne at dinner tonight as well. But she really needn’t bother. Truth be told he was only curious. And perhaps it was a little funny to see Kate scoff at his attempt to be stern.
“If your Lordship agrees of course.” Mr Abbott said quickly. “I have, of course, a number of other samples for your perusal. Ladies often require approval from their husbands before we proceed and I had thought-”
Anthony scoffed, kissing Kate’s cheek again quickly before he stood. “Nonsense, whatever Lady Bridgerton selects will be lovely I’m sure. It’s high time the lord’s chambers were redecorated. I’m sure it’s very dated.” He turned to Kate, tapping his foot against the blue and gold rug, “If I might put in a little bid for this one though, love. And ah… I’ve always wanted one of those… big sort of… leather armchairs for in here.” He turned back to the other man. “Do you think you could help Lady Bridgerton procure me one of those?”
The man’s mouth fell open in surprise, floundering. “I… yes, Lord Bridgerton. Of course, sir.”
“Excellent! If you can make this job your first priority I’ll add a bonus to your invoice.” He turned back to Kate who was smiling at him still, “Will you be joining me for tea in the study later?”
“I will, yes.”
“Lovely. I’ll see you later then, darling.”
And when he left the room he heard Kate sigh, “I’m a little annoyed that he did pick the nicest rug. Now I won’t get to argue with him.”
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collecting-stories · 9 months
Text
Peaches & Cream - Carmen Berzatto
Summary: Carmy talks the reader into making family and their relationship takes a turn.
A/N: I don't know if I like this installment as much as the other two but I'm running with it. Also, the actual dessert made is from Carolina Gelen and it's fucking delicious!
The Bear Masterlist
✰✰✰✰
You shook your head slowly back and forth, with what you were almost completely positive was a look of abject horror plastered across your face as your eyes met Carmy's blue ones. If there was one thing, anything, that you absolutely did not under any circumstances want to do it was cook in The Beef's kitchen. 
"No."
"It's not like you haven't cooked for everyone out there before," Carmy replied, leaning against the door and crossing his arms over his chest. 
"Yeah, but like...at my place...not like, seriously," you mirrored his image, leaning back in the office chair and crossing your arms. 
Carmy smiled, "family isn't serious." He said it in that way that suggested he'd caught you out. Like you were trying to pull one over on him but he found a loophole at the last second. He looked too triumphant for his own good. 
"Cars..." You groaned, there was no way you wanted to do family. When Syd did family it looked like some fucking five star gourmet meal. Even Ebra cooked up some really wonderful food for family. You had cooked at home, sure, but not in Carmy's kitchen. "Fine...but when it's shit-"
"It won't be," he replied and you practically felt the air knocked out of you. As if those three simple words had the power to truly dictate what sort of cook, chef, you were. And maybe they did because you felt ridiculously confident after he said it. 
You abandoned the paperwork to the office and followed Carmy into the kitchen. His attention didn't last long, immediately pulled to something else as Tina called him over to taste the potatoes she was working on. Your unexpected entrance into the kitchen didn't go unnoticed by Marcus or Syd or Tina, all three of whom followed you with their eyes as you went to the family shelf. You were positive you looked a little more than unsure of yourself as you pulled ingredients off the shelf, trying to think of a recipe that you could accomplish, that would taste good, and that might impress Carmy. 
-
"What?" 
"What?"
"People don't usually make that face after someone kisses them...unless like, I read the room wrong and I wasn't, or you didn't want me to kiss you," you stammered, eyebrow quirking as you stared at Carmy. Ever since the first Sunday Night Dinner you'd been thinking about what it would be like to kiss him. Probably ever since he first walked in The Beef and introduced himself to you. And maybe he hadn't been thinking about kissing you for that long but you thought maybe he was thinking about kissing you lately. Or not and you were atrocious at reading what vibe other people were projecting. 
"No, no...I mean, I, no, I wanted you to...I wanted to kiss you. I liked it. Ah..." Carmy inhaled, held his breath for a second and then exhaled. "I uh, you taste like peaches. It's like, really fucking wild, just like straight up peaches...like, not like chapstick shit or something but like actual fucking peaches." 
"Oh," you stopped yourself from laughing, "I uh, I ate like frozen peaches before you came over." You tried to explain. It was the most bizarre semi-compliment anyone had ever offered after a kiss. Probably in the history of the world. 
"Yeah?"
"I was trying this recipe-"
"What was it?" He looked over the back of the couch toward the kitchen as if a plate would be waiting there on the island for him to sample. 
"It's nothing fancy," you promised, a regular disclaimer whenever you made something new and let Carmy try it. You got up from the couch as you explained the recipe you'd seen online and had attempted to recreate in your own kitchen before Carmy had come over. Aside from the peach, which was frozen in your freezer, everything else was assembled. 
Whipped cream went in the bowl first, then the peach shavings, scrapped off a whole frozen peach like you were zesting a lemon, and then brown sugar syrup that you'd made earlier. In the short time it took you to assemble the dessert, Carmy came over to the island, leaning against the counter and watching you walk. 
"Here," you slid the bowl over and handed him a spoon from the utensil holder that sat in the middle of the island. He took it from you, his focus already zeroed in on the dessert sitting before him. The assembly was no five-star NOMA dish but you thought it tasted pretty good earlier and hoped you'd made it just as nicely the second time. 
The first time Carmy tried anything you made him your whole body had felt like it was on fire. Burning with nervous anxiety eating at your stomach. Now, you thought you should probably still be nervous but you weren't. Somehow you didn't have any of those nerves anymore. Or at least, they weren't turning over your stomach anymore. Instead it was just excitement, watching him taste the food that you prepared for him. 
"Well?"
With little actual warning, Carmy laid his spoon on the counter and leaned forward, kissing you this time instead of the other way around. You kissed him back, your hand moving to hold his face, fingers brushing the curls at the back of his neck. You'd be lying if you said you weren't a little dazed as he pulled away from the kiss, blue eyes shining with amusement as he smiled. Like really smiled, you noted. 
"Yeah, that's the peach I was tasting." He finally said, taking another bite of the dessert, "fire, by the way."
"Awesome," you stumbled over the word, not entirely sure it was the correct one to encapsulate the moment. 
-
You knew Marcus was hovering over you without needing to turn around, but you did anyway, twisting away from the focaccia bread that you were kneading onto the sheet pan to look up at him. "What?" You asked, unable to stop yourself from smiling when you caught the amused look on his face, "what?"
"You're doing family?" 
"Yeah, why...you have a problem with that?" You asked, trying to sound confident. 
"No...this looks good," Marcus replied, checking on the focaccia once more before stepping away from you. "What're you making?"
"Chicken parm sandwiches?" You replied, more as a question than a statement. As you slid the pan into the oven Marcus took a once over of the other ingredients on the counter. 
"You making your own mozzarella too?" He asked, sounding impressed that you were going to tackle something that complicated. 
"I am," you said, pulling a 'can you believe it' face, "Carmy showed me how to a couple weeks ago-"
"Carmy showed you how to?" He replied, the tone of the question teasing. 
"Don't you have like...something to do?" You asked, looking back at his station. 
You might've spent most of your shift in the back office but you knew that everyone in the kitchen was talking. It started with Richie, way before you and Carmy had kissed. He'd come into the office when you and Carmy were sitting in there and however you both were acting Richie had interpreted it as flirting (which was impressive considering how awkward you and Carmy flirting was). Richie being Richie, spread the news to Tina and Ebra and Sweeps, then Marcus heard about it and Sydney. Even Fak got filled in on the apparent 'romance' that was happening. You suffered through embarrassing comments every time you were remotely close to Carmy in the kitchen until finally everyone pretty much got used to the fact that you were pinning and probably never going to make a move. 
Or at least, you hadn't expected to ever make a move. He just looked so good sitting there on your couch and you'd been thinking about him for a long time and you were positive (at least 99% so) that recently he'd been thinking about you the same way. It was a long shot probably, cause Carmy was almost impossible to read unless he was yelling about food, but it worked out. 
"Are you doing family?" Syd asked. She was doing checks, purposely saving Marcus for last so she could see what you were up to. She'd seen you come out of the office with Carmy and go over to the family shelf, surprised since you never seemed eager to be anywhere near the kitchen during work hours. (Syd had come back for her headphones once and seen you and Carmy in the kitchen together, generally being cute...which she pointed out to you later on). 
"Yeah?" You felt even more unsure of yourself when she asked than you had when Marcus had asked before. 
She nodded, looking over the ingredients you had out. "Dope."
"Thanks," you laughed. 
You weren't surprised, considering how hectic you knew the kitchen could get, that you didn't actually see Carmy again (aside from glimpses as he moved back and forth from the kitchen to the counter and back) until family. And technically, once you'd plated family and called everyone out to eat, he was nowhere to be found. Richie told you he was having a cigarette around a mouthful of chicken parm sandwich so you plated some for him and carried it outside into the back alley. 
Carmy was sitting against the back wall, a plastic container of water in one hand and a cigarette in the other. He had his head tilted back and his eyes closed like he was maybe trying to catch a few seconds of rest before dinner rush. 
"Hey," you tapped his shoulder and Carmy started, opening his eyes and looking up at you. 
"Hey," he replied, laying down his container of water and taking the plate from you. He balanced it on his knees and picked up the sandwich to look it over. "What've we got?"
"Chicken parm sandwich on pistachio focaccia bread." You replied, "Richie said I was 'going all out'."
Carmy took a bite and you watched as his face change from neutral to slightly pleased. The look you knew meant that he liked something. "This is good, this is really good." He replied earnestly, taking another bite. "Did you make the mozzarella?"
"Does it taste bad?"
"No," he shook his head, looking away from the sandwich and up to you, "you could've kneaded it one more time, it's a little soft."
"I wasn't sure," you admitted, "you'll have to make me mozzarella and tomatoes again and show me how to make it." 
He'd shown you last week, when you were at his apartment for a change. He was in the middle of making dinner when he realized he didn't have mozzarella so he decided to make it, as if it was the most normal thing in the world to do. Or at least the most normal thing in Carmy's. 
"You heading back inside?" He asked as you reached for the door handle. 
"Back to the office, where I belong." You replied. 
He waved you back over, tilting his head back to look up at you when you were standing in front of him again. You took the silent invitation and leaned down to kiss him. "I won't taste like peaches this time." 
"It's not a stipulation," he joked and you smiled into the kiss. 
Eventually, sooner rather than later, you knew everyone in the kitchen would find out that you were dating. Probably everyone outside of the kitchen too, once Fak knew that you were together it was only a matter of time before everyone Carmy had ever met found out that he had someone in his life. 
"Okay," you sighed, reluctant to pull away but knowing there was a stack of invoices you needed to look through, "eat your too shitty sandwich and get back to work chef."
"You bossing me around now?" He laughed, stubbing out his cigarette and following you back through the door into the kitchen. 
Everyone else had finished eating and were back to their stations. Tina looked over first when the two of you came in and you smiled, "Carmy said it was awful and I'm never allowed in the kitchen again."
"I didn't say it was awful-"
"The mozz was a little soft but the focaccia was insane," Syd pipped up in your defense.
"I didn't say it was awful," Carmy repeated, nudging you with his elbow when you smiled at him.
"He didn't say it was awful," you admitted, "he did say the mozzarella was soft." 
"Why you being a fucking hardass about some cheese?" Richie called from the counter, coming over and throwing an arm over your shoulders, "I'm fucking shocked as it is you got this one to go out with you, now you're gonna be insulting?"
Carmy flushed red, whether because of Richie or because of the whistle Sweeps gave at the previously unconfirmed news that the two of you might be something, "can we get back to work chefs?" He finally said, moving away from you and over to one of the stations, grabbing his knife to start prep. 
"Guess that's my cue to get back to the office," you joked, slipping out from Richie's arm.
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