#this is another reason why the boys are so attached to Finn is because he understands better than anyone else on what they went through | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

blinderspeaky · 3 years

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Amoret | Tommy Shelby

A/n: So this is my first piece of writing here and I apologise if it's too long! idk how accurate this is but I had fun writing it so that's all that matters I guess

Cora is going through a dry spell because everyone is too scared to make a move on her because of her best friend, Thomas Shelby, so he takes matters into his own hands -- literally.

Word count: 23,450

"I can't believe you did that." I flirtatiously giggle as if I didn't have to scrub my hands raw to get rid of the blood from the gory mess that happened just a few hours prior.

"I needed to get out somehow, I just didn't realise I was trashing hundreds of pounds worth of art." The handsome stranger laughs, leaning into me as we get more familiar and comfortable with each other.

"Terrible, just terrible." I smile fondly, my red lipstick gleaming at him as I fiddle with my fruity cocktail.

"I must say, you have the most gorgeous smile, if I knew how to paint I'd never run out of inspiration as long as you're around." The man charms and I have to suppress an eye roll.

What does a girl have to do to just get a bit of pleasure round here?

I'm not here to be charmed, I'm here for a fun time.

"Thank you, you really know how to charm a girl." I say, crossing my leg over the other, so that my leg is in between his legs from where he's sat on the bar stool.

"Only the pretty ones." He replies, pushing the little curled bits of hair framing my face behind my ear-- the rest of my hair is placed in a delicate low bun, pinned back with expensive pins. He rubs his knuckles against my cutting cheek bone, seemingly admiring my face. "It's unfair how beautiful you are."

"What are you gonna do? Kiss me about it?" I make the first move.

He smirks.

"Thinking about it."

His eyes flicker between my eyes and my lips, and he's about to lean in when a voice interrupts.

"Cora." Tommy says as he walks up to us. "I'm going to head back to my office, I'll see you later to finish business, alright?"

"Yeah, just you?" I question, staring up at my best friend.

"Yeah, Arthur's pissed in the back room, thought I'd let you know, but everyone is still here." Tommy answers, giving my shoulder a squeeze.

"See yous." I sing, ready to turn back to my entertainment tonight.

"Bye." Tommy says and gives the handsome stranger a once over before leaning down to say something into my ear. I'm used to his teasing and he's used to my punches after, so I let out a huff, ready to hear what he has to say this time. "Careful, I've heard this one bites."

I look into his eyes with an annoyed look. "That's why I'm here."

Tommy lets out a quiet chuckle before wordlessly leaving the building, leaving me with the pretty boy.

Looking back at the stranger, I'm startled to find him wide eyed and inching away from me by the second.

"What?" I ask, taking a sip from my drink.

"That was... that was Thomas Shelby." He says, frozen.

"So?" I lift a perfectly arched eyebrow.

"He's a Peaky Blinder."

"So am I, yet you've been talking to me just fine." I state, knowing where this is going; this has happened way too many times recently.

People know of me but most people couldn't put a face to my name, which is why this happens a lot. I'm ready for the onslaught of rejection and a hint of terror.

"You're a Peaky Blinder?" He utters as if he can't believe it.

I nod.

"I've gotta, uh, go, have a nice evening but I must get going." He says and quickly gets off his stool to rush out of the room, practically tripping over his own feet.

Letting out a huff, I finish my drink before hopping off my stool to join everyone in the back room, everyone is more or less smashed, a slur of half hearted cheers go around room when I enter and it makes me smile. I sit down next to Finn, who offers me a cigarette, which I accept and light it up, tilting my head towards the ceiling showcasing the thin, long scar on my throat, I blow the smoke out, watching it billow towards the ceiling.

"Why are men so scared of me and Tommy?" I grumble.

"Because they know if they fuck up, either of you will rip their spleen out, darling." Polly comments, her slender fingers twitching her cigarette to drop off the ash. "Individually or together, doesn't matter." She adds.

"Match made in heaven... or hell, depends how you look at it." Michael states before downing his drink.

"How do you do it?" I ask Polly, taking a drag of my cigarette.

"Well, for starters, I'm not as ruthless as you and I guess I'm not attached to the hip with Thomas." She replies nonchalantly.

"What you need to do, right, Cora, is find a man who is handsome and can take a good punch." Arthur tells me and I raise an eyebrow at him. "Because whoever it is, he's gonna get punched by someone you know and by punched I mean shot."

"No one is bulletproof, Arthur." I say, not taking on his drunk advice.

"I am." John laughs.

"No, no you're fucking not." Finn retorts.

"How do girls not get scared of you guys?" I question, fiddling with my necklace. "On an extremely good day you guys can look intimidating and scary, how do you get girls?"

They all scoff at my teasing.

"Fuck off, alright." Arthur grumbles, knocking back another glass.

"The girls like the thrill. They come from a very traditional family and want a part of the danger but they also think they can change us." John answers my question seriously.

"Never fucking works though, does it?" Finn barks a laugh, nudging John.

We continue to chat for a while before I get bored and I'm still slightly pissed off about earlier, so I say my goodbyes not that anyone's really listening, too drunk to function so I slip out and step out into the brisk chilly streets of Birmingham.

Twisting and turning until I get to my destination, I open the door with the key I've had for literal years and brush my shoes off before stepping inside, closing the door behind me.

Making my way through the room, I wordlessly open Tommy's office, finding him sat at his desk going through paper work, cigarette in hand; he looks up, dropping his pen but goes back to his work.

"You're here earlier than I thought." He states, his tone light.

I huff, mad at him although I know it's not his fault.

"Same." I reply tightly, throwing my bag down into the little seating area in the corner of his office before I sit down in the chair opposite him.

"You don't have to be here, I can do this on my own, you know. I'm not forcing you to be here." Tommy replies in a sincere voice, taking a drag of his cigarette.

"I know, but no one wants me out there." I counteract, leaning back in my chair, a sour look on my face.

Tommy looks like he wants to ask but decides against it; he knows when I'll come around.

"Right, uh... so I talked to some connections and they said they know about the plans but are refusing to tell me any details, and I'm debating with either paying them a visit or selling their information." Tommy informs and just like that I'm back into business mode again, forgetting about my interaction from earlier.

Then we talk about business, business plans, plans for the future, and just random things whilst having a laugh.

As things are winding down, Tommy gets up to grab a drink from his own bar cart that he has in his office.

"Do you want one?" Tommy offers, looking over his shoulder at me.

"Sure." I accept and he gets another glass out, beginning to pour our drinks. I sink into my chair, rubbing my eyes as I let out a groan. I'm still bothered about earlier.

That guy just rubbed me the wrong way, it's happened plenty of times before tonight; I'm best friends with one the most notoriously dangerous person in the midlands, I guess tonight was just my breaking point.

If I saw him again, I wouldn't hesitate to send a few promises to him.

"Fuck, how come you can be a manwhore but I can't even get a single person to be interested in me for more than 20 minutes?" I question, accepting my glass from Tommy when he approaches me.

"Long enough to get the job done though." Tommy jokes, sitting down in the chair next to me, our feet hovering above one another where our legs are crossed. "I think it's a little thing called misogyny."

"Little thing my ass." I bitterly chuckle, taking a sip. "You're at fault for all this, by the way."

"The fuck did I do?" He asks with a light laugh, before taking a sip of his drink.

"You're the reason all these people get scared to either even approach me or go any further than some harmless flirting." I explain, tucking some hair behind my ear as I send him a look that only widens his smirk.

"Not my fault people are so delirious with terror when it comes to me." Tommy shrugs, placing his glass on the table beside his chair and he laughs at my disbelief.

"Yeah, because you definitely didn't put on a show at the garrison last month that we're still finding blood from." I roll my eyes fondly.

"Got to show my enemies what I'm capable of." Thomas brushes my words off. "And hey, it's not like you're innocent yourself. Didn't you destroy a guy's face so much they the police couldn't even identify him just a few days ago?" He teases, licking his lips.

"No, doesn't ring any bells." I shake my head.

"Funny, maybe that's why men are scared of you and won't approach you. I for one, am absolutely terrified of you." Tommy states, making me laugh knowing that's he's only half joking.

"Most people can't put name to my face so they generally don't know me, therefore it's your fault." I tell him, placing my drink on the matching side table next to me.

"Really?" He sighs

"Yes! Just earlier tonight I was talking to some guy and then you came along, Mr. I will cut someones ears off if they look at me, and you scared the bejeezus out of him, turned him into a puddle of foolery. Then I told him I'm connected to you and he freaked the fuck out, made an excuse to leave and he practically tripped over his own feet to get away from me." I reply grumpily, sitting up in my chair.

"Are you done?" Tommy asks, sending me a look.

"No, no I'm fucking not. I've not had sex in like 2 months, do you even know what that feels like? Most of the time it's not even me, it's you that scares them off!" I answer exasperated, watching him down the rest of his drink, placing the empty glass back on the table.

"No, I don't, actually. Why don't you just go outside of Birmingham for a fuck?" Tommy suggests, leaning forward on his knees.

"Fuck you. Mate, I've fucking tried and if we weren't literally sewn together that might work but everywhere I am, you are, vice versa. It's also such a faff to go all the way out or Birmingham for some dick that's probably mediocre. You ju---"

I'm cut off from my rant by Tommy's lips on mine.

I'm so confused and stunned by his actions that I don't know how to react. Freezing, I just sit there for a moment before I decide to kiss him back for a few moments before I pull back sort of abruptly, not in a big deal.

"What are you doing?" I question, searching his crystal clear blue eyes that are mere inches away from my face.

"If everyone else is so scared of me that they can't approach you, may as well take matters into my own hands." Thomas explains, and he gingerly cups my cheek, his thumb brushing over my cheekbone, his eyes soft.

I lean in closer to him, thinking over how this could play out, what it would do to our years long friendship.

It's no secret that we find each other attractive, we've said it to each other and everyone around us, but I can honestly say that nothing has ever happened between us. Two best friends that have expressed our admiration for each other.

I don't know if I want to ruin that.

Our friendship is incredibly strong and personal, I don't know if one steamy night could just throw that away.

My desire acts on it's own and as Tommy is searching my green eyes, I close the gap between us, moving in perfect sync with each other as I play with his hair and he squeezes my waist.

It's like I'm slipping into a trance and all I can think of is Tommy, I'm consumed with all things Tommy. This moment right now is making me feel lighter than air, I've got sparks on my stomach at how he's making me feel.

The burning need to be closer is killing me and it seems like Tommy is feeling the same as he uncups my cheek and places his hands on my waist, pulling me onto his lap.

Thomas agonizingly slowly trails his hand up my thigh, his fingertips grazing my exposed skin where my dress has risen up, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind. Tommy's hand comes in contact with the pocket knife stuffed into my stocking and he pulls away slightly, letting out a low throaty chuckle, "Classic Cora." He mumbles against my mouth, making me smile, and he pulls deadly weapon from my stocking, placing it on the table beside him. Giving my hip a momentary squeeze, Tommy swipes his tongue against my lip asking for entrance, parting my lips, his tongue meets mine and he begins to explore my mouth, seeing what gets a reaction from me.

His fingers find my precariously placed tied up hair, pulling the few pins out and then the hair tie, sending my thick, dark brown almost black curls cascading down my back, causing Tommy to let out a sound of appreciation and bury his fingers into my hair.

I don't usually have my hair down as it's easy to grab on to and it just feels more professional to have it up. I've also got so much of it that it gets in the way when I'm trying to work.

Disconnecting from Tommy I attach my mouth to his neck, leaving my mark. Tommy tilts his head, giving me space to find his sweet spot and he lets out a nice little moan as I set to work.

The pending feeling of his hand trailing my thigh is overwhelming and his fingertips approaching where I need him the most makes me pause, my bottom lip dragging up the skin of his neck.

"Do you want me to stop?" Thomas whispers into my ear, his pursed lips tugging at my earlobe.

"Fuck no." I consent, and his hand meets my underwear.

Beginning to confidently rub me through my underwear, I let out a shaky breath against Tommy's neck and I instinctively open my legs wider for him. His touch is as light as a feather, desperate for more friction, I grind on his fingers letting out a moan.

"Mm, sound so good for me." Tommy rasps, his teeth grazing the skin on my prominent collarbone. Moving my fancy lacy underwear to the side, without hesitation Tommy runs his fingers through my folds, collecting my wetness and bringing it up to my clit.

All I can do is bite my lip to conceal my moans.

Trailing my hand down his front until I meet is trousers and I begin to palm is growing semi, which makes him let out a groan.

I declare that as my favourite sound.

Suddenly in one swift motion, I'm moved off of Tommy's lap and placed right on the edge of his hardwood desk and he's standing right in front of me, his gorgeous blue eyes blown out, looking at me as if I were the only person in world, and he's hungry.

"You're really pretty." Tommy utters.

Before I can reply, Thomas captures my lips again in another sensual kiss that's full of tongue, noises of appreciation, and hands are roaming as we keep involuntarily grinding against each other.

Pushing his suit jacket off and watching it drop to the floor, Tommy's hands find the back of my dress, making quick work of undoing the expensive fabric, and pulling it off of me, leaving me in my lingerie that I definitely didn't plan on letting my best friend see tonight whilst he's in his trousers, crisp white shirt, and extortionate looking waistcoat.

"Wow." My best friend says, slightly out of breath, taking in my figure and how off guard and innocent I look.

Unlike the brutally violent and devious businesswoman I am.

"Unbelievable."

"Shut up and touch me." I chuckle bashfully, weirded out at how special he's making me feel.

I feel extremely exposed but in a weird way, I kind of like it.

Tommy smiles fondly and presses a series of short kisses to my mouth before I take hold of his lip, flicking my tongue against him, causing him to tighten his grip on me.

Disconnecting, Thomas kisses down my neck, leaving a mark or two on his way down, until he gets to my chest and I arch into him. Kissing my cleavage as he cups my right boob, his lips trail down my torso, leaving a trail of fire behind him.

Dropping down to his knees, Tommy takes hold of my hips pressing a gentle kiss below my belly button before he snaps open my garter one by one and effortlessly drags my stockings down my legs.

Grazing up my legs with his hands or mouth, Tommy after what feels like years pulls my panties down, throwing them out of sight, I watch as his eyes light up and if possible I feel even more exposed.

Flicking his eyes up to me, looking like he's asking for my consent, I brush my fingers through his hair and give him a subtle nod.

Burying his head between my thigh, Tommy licks a strip up my heat, making me let out a moan, and bury my fingers into his thick hair.

Leaning back onto his desk, Tommy pushes my thighs apart so he can get better access as he attaches his mouth so my core, sending me to all sorts of heaven.

"Fuck, Tommy." I whine, tugging at his hair as I arch my back.

"Let it out, we're here alone, scream my name, let me hear how much you want me." Tommy urges with a slight smirk.

Without any warning, Tommy pumps a finger into me and I conform to his wishes at that, not caring how loud I was being, I let his name fall from my lips along with my moans.

My legs shudder under his hand, he lapped at me as if I were his last meal, reveling in the sounds I was making, the sounds he was earning.

I was close and we both knew that, so Tommy speeds up his movements and adds another finger inside of me, curling up.

"Fuck, oh my god, Tommy, don't stop." I pant, tugging at his hair.

Tommy had me withering in moments, my fingers tugging at his hair which made him groan, only adding to the pleasure he was giving me.

"Fuck, I'm gonna---" I began which only spurred Thomas on, he sucked harder and pumped his fingers faster. My breathing hitched and shaky, breathy, and loud sounds left my lips as I clenched around him, my body shuddering from the orgasm he'd worked out of me.

He continues his motions making sure I'm done, then pulls his fingers out, standing up right, brushing some hair out of my face.

"Such a pretty girl." He whispers, eyeing my lips.

Tommy's thumb runs over my bottom lip and I open my mouth, he brings his fingers that were inside of me to my lips, and I stick my tongue out and he inserts his finger into mouth, letting me suck my juices off of his fingers; his eyes seemingly in a trance at how my mouth is working.

"Mm, just like that." He whispers.

Standing up to my full height, I guide Tommy to swap places with me and he's very much willing to do so, peppering kisses to his jaw before dropping to my knees, I innocently look up at him through my lashes, loving how he's so aware of all my movements and how he's like putty in my hands.

"May I?" I raise an eyebrow, digging my fingertips under his belt.

Tommy leans down and cups my jaw, pressing a deep kiss to my lips. "Of course." I grin in delight and snatch a quick kiss as he begins to retreat.

Undoing his belt, I take that off and throw it away before undoing his button and pulling down his zipper. Palming him through his undone trousers, Tommy lets out a hitched breath, it's a barely there pressure, enough to feel something but no where enough as much as he like.

"Stop teasing." He groans, bracing himself on his desk and his knuckles are milky white from how hard he's holding on to his desk.

I chuckle darkly. "Tommy, I haven't even started."

Continuing my actions mixing up my pressure and pace as he throws his head back in annoyance.

Pulling him out of his underwear letting him spring free, Thomas groans when I grab him, making my mouth water. This sight alone could give me immense pleasure.

The sight of me on my knees in front of him, him practically fully clothed with his dick out, just calling out for me to suck, all whilst in the middle of his office.

With my best friend let alone.

I would love to tease him for hours but the overwhelming urge to hear Tommy moan, moan my name and pull my hair gets the best of me.

Tightening my grip on him, I wrap my lips around his tip that's already leaking precum, sucking lightly, which makes him throw his head back in pleasure.

"So pretty, such a pretty cock." I utter, licking his entire length and wrapping my mouth around him.

"Fuck, Cora." Tommy gasps, threading his hand in my hair to keep me there, and I let out a hum, causing him to tighten his grip on my hair as he lets out an estranged moan.

Taking as much as I possibly can into my mouth, I begin to work my magic, pumping whatever I can't with my hand whilst Tommy breathes heavily and lets out his moans above me.

The sight of him with his head thrown back as he moans my name whilst he half heartedly guides me with his hand, too lost in the pleasure to properly commits to it, is ingrained in my mind.

We're completely lost in the moment, right now it's just him and I, there's nothing else in our mind except lust and each other, and I'm alright with that.

"Oh my... fuck, I can't l---" Tommy cuts his pleasured rambling off and lets out a large breath before pulling me off of him. "I wanna finish inside of you." Tommy states breathlessly.

I wordlessly stand up, more than willing to conform to his needs and begin to undress him, his hands pulling off his clothes as fast as he can until he's completely stark naked in the middle of his office with his best friend.

Realising I've still got my bra on, I undo the back and pull the straps down, watching it fall the floor.

Tommy and I stand in front of each other, completely enamoured with each other, feeling extremely exposed but I like it.

"Gorgeous." Thomas whispers before pressing his lips to mine, gingerly holding my face in his hands.

Thomas guides me back a few steps to his desk and I prop myself upon it, as Tommy's hands roam.

Taking hold of himself, Tommy runs his tip through my dripping folds, the both of us letting out a shaky breath.

"You ready?" Tommy questions, tucking some hair behind my ears before pressing his forehead against mine.

"Mhm." I hum, running my hand down his back.

Capturing my lips in a quick kiss, Tommy lines himself up with my entrance and pushes in until he's done to the hilt.

"Fuck." We say in unison, making us breathe a chuckle.

Beginning to move his hips, Tommy buries his face in my neck, dragging his mouth wherever he pleases, exploring my skin. I hold the back of his neck, trying to stay afloat as my toes curl, and we're too far gone to care when expensive things fall from Tommy's desk.

***

"You should wear your hair down more often." Tommy tells me softly as he's propped up on his elbow looking down at me as I lie on my back, settling into the fairly large seating area Tommy has in his office.

"It's so long, it gets in the way." I pout, rubbing my eye.

"I like it." He sincerely says, picking up a lock and twirling it around his finger.

We're have gentle pillow talk without the pillows, just looking at each other in a different way as we lie in our underwear in the warm room, talking in quiet voices as if the whole world could hear us.

"I like your hair, very imaginative." I tease, combing his locks with my fingers.

"Rude." He grumbles, poking me in the side making me jerk as I let out a laugh.

"When you first get it cut it feels like velcro." I chuckle, making him grin.

"Yeah, I've just got the worst barber." Tommy smirks, playing with my fingers.

"Bitch." I laugh, ruffling his velcro like hair.

Every other Sunday Tommy sits in my kitchen letting me cut his hair as we bitch about business or just forgetting about work altogether.

"Talented at your craft but the most annoying barber I've ever met." He shakes his head, amused.

"I tell you each time, I don't mean to tickle your neck or catch your ear, it just happens." I defend myself, making him laugh.

"I don't mean to stab you, it just happens!" Tommy imitates me, making me poke him in the ribs which only makes him laugh harder. "If only people knew of your barbering skills and not your knife wielding skills, maybe they wouldn't be so scared of you."

"If only people knew of your sewing skills, they wouldn't be so scared of your gun ridden hand." I retort with a fond smile, looking up at how pretty he looks in this light, with the small matching fond smile of his face.

"Shh, or I'll tell people you are a professional at juggling." Tommy smirks, pushing some hair out of my face.

"Yeah, with knives, that's cool as fuck." I reply, passionate about my talent.

"Careful or we'll send you away to go to the circus." Tommy chuckles, pulling me in for a smiley kiss.

I've always been known to wake up really late, always the last one up, the last one to finish breakfast if at all, and always the last one out of the door in the morning. It's not that I stay out really late, I'm usually at home at a reasonable time, I cosy down in my homely home, and I just relax after the usually hectic day and yet I still wake up late.

Except today.

I wake up tangled in a mess of limbs, Tommy's arms wrapped around me and I suck in a breath, wishing on everything in the world that he doesn't wake up. Easily slipping out of his grasp, I sit on the edge of the large ottoman, rubbing my face before letting out a sigh.

I need to get dressed and be out of here before Thomas wakes up, I do not want to have the awkward conversation of the morning after.

Quickly and quietly, I put my dress back on, throw my hair up as I approach the window, pulling one of the slats down to see what it's like at this ungodly hour of 5 in the morning, the Sun is just starting to rise, highlighting the permanent haze of smoke above Birmingham.

Shoving my ankle boots on, I tug the zips up and tip toe towards the door so that my heels don't click against the wooden floors.

Closing the door behind me as silently as possible, I let out a big breath when I succeed and begin to walk out the building that I visit everyday.

I know I'm going to see Thomas again in just a few hours but hopefully we'll both be consumed in work to talk about what happened. God I hope no one will pick up on what happened.

I don't regret last night at all and I can say that with my whole chest but I also love my friendship with Tommy, and I hope one night of mind blowing, amazing sex won't ruin that.

I've no idea where we stand and that scares me.

That's my best friend, he'll always be my best friend.

Opening up the door to my house that I never got to see last night, I begin to tidy up a few things as I've got some time before I have to head into work. This is my haven, this is wear I escape work, I try not to bring business back here, this is my safe place so I have to have it clean.

Shoving an old newspaper into the bin, I begin to make a bite of breakfast and head into my bedroom whilst it cooks so I can get properly dressed.

Pulling my wardrobe open, brushing my fingers over the hangers until I find a suitable item a clothing; a navy blue dress that gives the illusion that it's off the shoulder but it's got a see through mesh-like material hanging from my shoulders with tiny multicoloured flowers embroidered into it, it's cinched at the waist but it's got a wavy extra bit of fabric above my chest, the length is slightly longer than I usually go for as it's inches shy from my ankles, whilst I usually go for just below the knee dresses but I like it.

Just about being able to do it up myself, I pick out some appropriate shoes with a tall heel as I'm surrounded by a lot of men so I hate being the shortest person in the room.

Plus Tommy is quite a bit taller than me and he always teases me for that, so I use my heel to either kick him in the shin or step on his toes.

Gently brushing through my hair to make sure it doesn't frizz up on me, I throw it up in an intricate low bun, leaving some large parts out to frame my face.

Going back downstairs to fetch my breakfast which I eat whilst I read this morning's paper, before I head out of the door.

***

"Well I'll say, this has got to be a first." Arthur laughs, leaning back in his chair as I enter the betting shop.

"Wow," Polly starts, looking at her watch bewildered. "Only 45 minutes late."

Even though I got up at the ass crack of dawn, I'm still late as I may or may not of got preoccupied with the book I've been reading recently and then I got caught up chatting with some people on my way over here.

"I usually expect to see you at around 10 or 11." John smirks, taking his cigar out of his mouth.

"What can I say? Don't get used to it." I say, my eyes flickering towards Tommy's office where he seems to be as of now and I can't help by think about last night.

"It's almost as if you're acting professional and playing by the rules." Polly sarcastically replies, hovering above Arthur.

"Never." I shake my head, placing my bag on my desk then hanging my long coat on the coat hanger.

"Tommy's in a bad mood, so watch out." John jokes, swinging in his chair.

"Really?" I raise an eyebrow, looking at him.

"Well, he's not really in any mood, he's just brooding in silence and doesn't want to interact or talk to anyone." Polly rolls her eyes,making her way over to her own work station. "Maybe you can sort him out." She adds, with a small smile.

Doubt it.

"I've gotta get my forms so I have to interact with him." I huff and brace myself as I open the door to his office, I've never knocked before so I'm not gonna start now.

"Good morning." Michael greets me, sitting in the chair that Tommy kissed me in.

"Morning." I say back, my eyes flicking up to Tommy who's not taking his eyes off of his work in front of him.

"Do you even know what this time of day looks like?" Michael teases, and I roll my eyes.

"Don't worry, Michael, she's been up for hours, I'm sure Cora loves the sunrise." Tommy states before I can even think of replying to Michael.

I glare at him as he leans back in his chair, lighting up his cigarette not even looking at me.

If he wants to be hostile, I can always beat him at that.

"Practically pulled an all nighter, was busy with a piece of work." I tell Michael but my words are aimed at Tommy, and I'm right because Tommy can be a piece of work when he wants to be.

Tommy just exhales his smoke and looks at me devoid of any emotion as I refuse to look at him.

"Should've asked for a hand, I'd of been more than willing." Michael says, completely oblivious to Tommy and I's quips.

"No, couldn't do that to you." I wave him off. "Anyway, I only came in here to get my forms." I say, finally looking at Tommy in the eyes, waiting for him to give them to me as they're in his drawer.

He just stares at me, his cigarette burning in his hand, seeming like there's a million words in his head that he wants to say yet absolutely thoughtless at the same time.

"Run along then, Michael." Tommy says as he hands Michael a file, which Michael wordlessly takes and exits the room.

Letting out a huff, I walk around his desk and crouch down next to him to open his bottom drawer.

"You're a twat, Tom." I grumble, grabbing the wad and standing up.

"No what you were saying la---" Tommy gets cut off by me slamming the stupid forms on his desk and the grabbing his own gun from his holster and pressing it below his jaw as I hold his throat, pushing him back in his chair.

"Finish that sentence, I dare you." I prompt him, looking at his slightly taken aback eyes. "You know I'll do it."

He stays silent, clearly picking up on my vibe.

Putting pressure on my hands one last time before throwing his gun into his lap, gathering what I came in here for and leaving his office.

Tommy and I bicker all the time, disagree on extremely menial stuff but we only properly argue very occasionally but we always come around in the end because despite everything we love each other but god can we get on each other's nerves.

Not that I'd call that an argument, that was just a warning.

"We knew you weren't a morning person but fuck Tommy must've pissed you right off." Arthur laughs, as he chalks some stuff up on the big blackboard.

"More than you'll ever know." I grumble, and begin to get to work.

***

As the Sun sets, people start clearing out of the building as they finish their work, singing or grumbling a goodbye over their shoulder as they go home to their family or lonesome house. I could only dream of clocking out as I've still got a load of work to do and not even the kind I like, it's all admin and menial things that need to be done but I wouldn't consider it fun by any means.

It's kind of nice in a funny sort of way, it's dark outside and the lights are on illuminating the room with a soft glow, there's a slight patter of rain on the windows and it's just relaxing and quiet.

It's giving me a moment with my mind to think things over as I pretty much work on autopilot.

I know Tommy is still here, I can see him through the glass doors to his office, clearing extremely concentrated on whatever he's doing; I wonder if his mind keeps drifting back to what we did on his desk just last night.

I don't what to say to him, he's giving me the cold shoulder, refuses to talk to me unless it's necessary, and I just don't know where we stand. I don't know what I want to come from last night, I'm really happy with where we are right now and although I had - arguably - the best sex of my life last night, not much can come between our friendship.

I felt something that night, Tommy made me feel so special and like I was the most important person in the world to him, and I couldn't deny that those feelings.

Letting out a sigh, I drop my pen and grab a cigarette, placing it between my lips before I search for my matches. Striking a match, I tilt my head back and as I'm bringing the flame to my cigarette my eyes catch Tommy leaning against the doorway to his office, staring at me.

I pause for a moment before lighting my cigarette and waving the match out as I exhale.

"You look really pretty when you concentrate." Tommy states and if there were another person in here I don't think I would of been able to hear him.

"I don't do it often so you're welcome." I reply, never one to take compliments. "But thanks." I bashfully add.

"We both know that's not true." Tommy smiles ever so slightly.

"You look really pretty when you smile." I reply, taking a drag from my cigarette.

Tommy steps down the few steps and approaches me.

"Cora... what's going on?" Tommy asks, turning the chair beside me around so he can sit on it backwards, his arms folded on the backrest.

I look down, not sure what to say or where to look or how to react.

"I don't... I don't know." I say quietly, almost ashamed to admit. I'm always in control of a situation, I know the ins and outs but this time I have no idea where I stand, what's going on and I'm definitely not in control; neither of us are.

"Do you regret it?" He questions and I look at him properly.

"No, I don't. I can honestly say that I don't regret it." I answer sincerely, and a shimmer of relief speeds across his eyes. "Do you?"

"No. It was great and you don't regret great things." Tommy replies after a few moments, watching me stub out my cigarette. "But... I was hurt that you left before I woke up." He hesitantly adds, as if he doesn't know how to put his words together.

Neither do I.

Looking around the room as I try to gather my words, I can feel his bright blue eyes boring into my side and its quite unnerving.

"I didn't know what to say to you. Tommy, you're my best friend, you have been since year 9, we've gone through so much together and I can always rely on you ---you've always just been my best friend. Then suddenly when I get rejected by some twat who's scared of either women in general or the fact that you are my best friend and you decide to kiss me and then things escalate, things change. For good or for bad I don't know." I try to just put some of my thoughts into words.

"You could've left a note, woke me up if you really needed to go, silently got dressed with me and then we parted ways, anything... anything other than wordlessly leaving. Everything stopped, I slept a full night, I didn't have any messy dreams, I woke up rested, then when I saw you weren't there with me, none of that mattered anymore." Thomas explains with a small shrug, his eyes burning for a conclusion, a cohesive answer, anything.

"Only because you had company, female company no doubt." I state, sending him a tired look. His face is illuminated by the standing lamp behind me, highlighting his slight frustration, hurt, and confusion.

"No, I'm almost 100 percent sure it's not just female company. When I got back from fighting and I was having my night terrors, I'd call you up and you'd come sleep in my bed, and you'd help me fall asleep again and at least help with my dreams. When I was using you'd demand that we share a bed because you knew that I knew that you hated it. You've always helped me sleep." Tommy insists, leaning forward in his chair.

"I was just being a good friend, Tom."

"I'm not asking you to be my girlfriend or to marry me, I'm just saying I sleep better with you around. I don't know what I want to come out from this or where we stand but please promise that at the end of the day we'll always be best friends." Tommy pleads, grabbing my hand, clasping it with both of his.

"We'll always be best friends, Thomas. No matter how mad I am at you or you at me, I'll always be there for you." I assure, squeezing his hand with a small smile. "I hate not being in control, my whole life I've always been in control, had a grip on things, and just knew the ins and outs of every situation, then suddenly I don't it scares the living hell out of me, Tom. I don't know how to react."

"I'm not asking you to, I'm just as confused and lost as you are, I don't know where we stand or how to be normal again." Tommy says, his eyebrows raised. "I don't know what I want to come from this, but I know I'll always want you around."

"Same, always." I tell him, looking deep into his eyes. "I've gotta go, Tommy, I'll see you tomorrow." I lie, I've still got a load of work to do but if Tommy keeps looking at me like he is now, I'm not going to be able to make it out of here without my hair a mess.

Standing up, I push my chair back in and take a step away before Tommy says something.

"You can't keep running from your problems."

I pause, turning to look at him.

"Sorry?"

"You can't keep running away from things that you can't solve in 5 minutes." Tommy expands, looking up at me. He looks uncertain, as if he doesn't know how I'll react.

Keeping my gaze on his for a split second more before I swiftly bend down to press my lips against his, cupping his cheek. He seems surprised and stills for a moment then eagerly kisses me back, his hand also on my cheek.

We kiss for a few more moments until I pull back slightly, our faces inches away. "Watch me." I whisper, looking into his stormy sea of blue eyes, and my eyes flicker down to his lips before I stand up to my full height.

Taking a step back to make my move out of here but Tommy suddenly stands up straight and grabs my hand before I can escape and pulls me into him, immediately cupping my face with his soft hands and softly crashes his mouth to mine.

Without any hesitation I kiss him back, wrapping my arms loosely around his neck as I slowly relax into him. Tommy pulls me impossibly close to him, feeling every contort of his body, his hands steadily trail down my back as I work my mouth against his.

Once again, Tommy pulls my hair out of my hairband, letting my wild locks bounce free around my back. He buries his fingers into my curls whilst his other hand wonders, feeling my waist, hips and ass.

I press my hips against his and he leans against the nearest desk, he lets out a moan at the feeling of my hips and I take advantage of that so my tongue can get reacquainted with his.

Last time it was slow, hesitant touches, taking our time but this time it's eager, fast moving, and hungry.

I let out a moan when Tommy flicks his tongue against mine, completely lost in the moment; I can feel that I'm losing myself in him, his touch, his mouth, his mind. Disconnecting, Tommy attaches his mouth to the sensitive skin on my neck, dragging his lips up to the sweet spot below my ear.

The fast that he knows that fact sends me reeling over something so silly and simple, but it wakes me up.

Immediately I push myself off of him, taking a few shaky steps back with wide eyes. He looks shocked, his blown out eyes shining in concern, and he takes a step towards me.

"Co---"

"No." I shake my head. "We can't do this, I need to leave." I blurt out and make an exit, not bothering to pick up my coat on the way out as Tommy calls after me, but I slam the door on him, blocking out his voice that's always been comforting for me.

***

"Turns out it was just a fluke then." Polly teases, lighting up a cigarette as I enter the building.

"Seems like it." I agree, glancing at the clock, seeing it reads 10:45.

"Who's this raven haired beauty walking in?" A familiar voice asks, and I look to my left to see Ada proudly sitting on the closest desk to me.

"What are you doing here?" I ask, not being able to help the grin on my face as I approach her, pulling her into a quick hug.

"Thought I should come up as I haven't seen everyone in a while, and you even longer." Ada explains, and it's true as the last time she came up I was busy visiting my family that live down south.

"Well, it's great to see you again. Did you bring Karl?" I question, and as I'm looking at her I can't help the guilt that tugs at me as I slept with her brother just a few nights ago.

"Yeah, he's busy making a mess in Tommy's office with Finn." She answers, folding her arms.

"I'm sure he'll look forward to finding that." I smirk. "Is Tommy here by the way?" I ask curiously, hanging my bag up along with my coat, next to the coat I left here last night when I made a hasty exit.

"No, something happened at The Garrison or something and he had to go sort that out." Ada informs me, sending me a quizzical look when I let out a sigh of relief.

"Michael said someone got too rowdy and fired some shots at someone, no ones seriously hurt but Tommy went to go sort it out." Polly says, walking towards us creating a trio.

"When did your hair get so long?" Ada asks fascinated, her slender fingers coming up to grasp a few loose curls.

"I've not seen you without your hair up in what? Two years, maybe?" Polly comments, also looking at my hair.

"I just didn't have time this morning to do it, rolled out of bed, parted it and left." I tell her, running my hand through it.

"Didn't have the time? It's nearly 11 o'clock and you're only just strolling into work." Ada exclaims with a laugh.

"It took me ages to get to sleep, and I need my 8 hours." I retort, the reasons I couldn't get to sleep need to remain a secret.

Her damn brother.

"And just because you're you Tommy won't get mad. If any of us are more than 20 minutes late, Tommy will act like a child." Polly roll her eyes.

"How do you do it?" Ada asks genuinely.

Suck his dick apparently.

"I simply just show him my knife and he does whatever." I joke, with a smirk. "Hey, it's not like you have to be here at 8 or 9 on the dot, you're all founders of this company, you have just as much of say as that dumb fuck."

"True, but you can't deny that Tommy will throw a fit if we're late, where as you..."

"What can I say? Shelbys love me." I tease and leave the room.

It's just pushing 3 pm when Tommy walks into the room again, the first time I'm seeing him since I freaked out last night. It's been a busy and chaotic day so far, people coming in and out, I had to go deal with someone who wasn't paying up which got a bit messy, then I had to catch up on all the things I didn't do yesterday after leaving prematurely, and to do that with a messy head on top of that is difficult.

Tommy searches the room as he continues to walk through the room until he finds me. "You, my office." He points his finger at me and then towards his office doors.

"No?" I shake my head, quirking my eyebrows.

"It's fucking business that's all." Tommy huffs from across the room, giving me a slight glare before looking down and heading towards his office.

Pushing my chair out, I let out an even bigger huff than Tommy's and stand up, meeting him at his office doors. Our eyes flicker over each other extremely briefly before he opens his door and lets me enter first.

We both stop short at the sight of a man sitting in the chair opposite Tommy's desk.

"Who's that?" I whisper to Tommy, neither of us taking a step further.

"Mr Parsons, wants business with us." Tommy briefly tells me before moving forward. "Good afternoon, Mr Parsons."

"Ah! Good afternoon, not that good in a place like this." Mr Parsons states, looking up at Tommy as he goes to sit in his desk chair.

"Good afternoon." I greet and sit down in the chair next to him.

"Oh, a woman, a pretty woman that is." He comments with a weird smile of his face.

I send a quick look to Tommy who looks just as speechless as I am. "Thank you, business --- what can we do for you?"

Ever since I joined The Shelby Company Limited all those years ago Tommy's always asked me to join in with meetings. Not entirely sure why if I'm honest, he's always said and I quote 'you give me a level headed opinion', whatever that means.

"I need protection, I've recently moved to this shithole and I've heard that you so called Peaky Blinders are the best people for the job." Mr Parsons states, intertwining his fingers over his chest.

Tommy and I share a look at his choice of words.

"What do you need protecting?" Tommy questions, leaning back in his chair.

As Mr Parsons answers Tommy's question in his unique way of vocabulary, I take a good look at him. He's probably at the higher end of middle-aged, a full head of black hair growing white, a rather slim and tall build, well dressed, a thin greying moustache, and a sinister smile. He's not unattractive but there's something just off about his face.

"We will definitely look into that, Mr Parsons, we'll need to assess the situation ourselves first." Tommy says, gesturing with his hands.

"This pretty lady, I hope of course." He gives me a grin, and I grip the arms of the expensive chair to stop myself from showing him what I really think of him.

"No." Tommy bluntly tells him. "My brother will."

"That's a real shame." Mr Parsons sighs and looks at me as if I were his last meal on earth. "I must say, I think it's really great that you have so many women working for you."

"First of all," Tommy starts, leaning back in his chair and lights a cigarette, "They work with me, and secondly if you weren't so creepy and weird, you'd not speak of women as if they're a rare breed of dog."

Mr Parsons takes no notice of Thomas, just keeps his smile as his green eyes take me in, making my skin crawl. If the circumstances wear different and we were in a different environment I'd of either punched the guy in the face or threatened to do something worse by now, but because this is business and he could be important, I can't.

I lead forward in my chair to be closer to him despite my whole body screaming no. "You're coming on a little strong."

"That's just the way I act with beautiful women. A good one only comes around once and a while and you have to snap them up real fucking quick." He replies, with a wink, looking proud of himself.

"And you think it's working?" Tommy sasses and I stifle a chuckle, pursing my lip to conceal my smirk.

"I know it's working." He states over confidently, which even if I were into him, that would be a big turn off.

Like Tommy, he has a certain confidence about him but it's not stifling, big headed, or cocky, it's subtle, he demands it without verbally demanding it, and it's attractive.

Ew, since when did I use my best friend as a model of what is hot and not?

"Business, Mr Parsons, we're here for business." I remind him, sending him a stern look.

"See." Mr Parsons smirks at Tommy, and I roll my eyes as Tommy just stares straight through him, his cigarette seemingly forgotten as it burns in his fingers. "My business need protecting because I've made a few enemies in my year, and people like trying to tear me down."

"Wonder why." I mumble in a huff.

"What was that, sweetheart?"

"Oh nothing, just talking to myself, nothing for you to worry about." I wave him off, throwing a glare at him I how intrusive he's being.

"Anything that concerns your gorgeous mind is my concern, darling." Mr Parsons states softly before he grabs my hand that was dangling off of the arm of my chair.

I throw my head back in annoyance; I'd give anything to show this bitch my knife. I pull hand back, wanting to wash hands immediately.

"Why should we give you our protection?" Tommy asks, raising an eyebrow, taking a drag from his cigarette.

"Because, you clearly need it." Mr Parsons says, taking his eyes off of me from practically looking through my clothes to look at Tommy straight in the eyes.

Tommy abruptly gets up and rounds his desk towards me, he nods his head for me to get out of my chair, which I do and Tommy places his hand on my waist as we switch places to me sitting in his chair opposite Mr Parsons to Tommy sitting next to him, I can feel Mr Parsons' eyes on my body as I move. Tommy leans forward in his new chair, looking deep into Mr Parsons' eyes.

"What's that supposed to mean?" He questions, looking scary but it's kinda hot and to be honest, I'm slightly turned on.

"You live in a place like this, it's pretty self explanatory." Mr Parsons replies, crossing his leg over the other.

"I choose to live here, you don't have a choice." Tommy points out, clearly knowing more about him than I do.

"If that's what you want to believe, sure." He chuckles, throwing his head back.

"I'm not accustomed to being spoken to like that, especially not in my own fucking office." Tommy states, shaking his head slightly.

"What? No one been brave enough?" He chortles. "I've always been---"

"No one's seen the next morning after." Thomas cuts him off bluntly, and Mr Parsons stills for a moment.

This is such a dangerous and tense moment yet all I can do is keep my eyes locked on Tommy and all I want in the world right now is a repeat of the other night.

"I'm here to make a deal, Mr Shelby."

"Fine, give me your proposition." Tommy says, leaning back in his seat.

"50 percent of what I can--- no, will bring into The Shelby Company." Mr Parsons states with no remorse.

"And how do you expect to do that?" Tommy practically almost laughs, and I bite my lip to stop my guffaws coming out.

"With my business. If you protect me and people know that we're in bed together, you'll get even more people coming to you, you won't know where to put all the money." He answers, clearly delusional.

"Anything more you want from your so called deal?" Tommy asks, raising an eyebrow.

"A night with the girl."

We both freeze at that, both of us not believing that he just said that.

Tommy's always been protective of me, especially with people like this. I can even remember when I'd get people a year or two above me in school hitting on me or flirting with me, Tommy would always put them in their place and then ask if I was okay.

Yet at the same time, he knows to give me space and when I'm at my breaking point. He knows I don't like being smothered and accommodates for that.

"She's off the fucking table, untouchable." Tommy states with no hesitation or room for arguing. "Get the fuck out of my office." He shakes his head.

"I said sh---"

"Out." I push and he turns to look at me, his eyes widening at the sight of a gun pointed at his head.

"Yo---"

"Out." I push and pull the slide back.

He wordlessly gets up and Tommy and I escort him out as he swears a storm, slamming the door after himself.

Tommy and I stare at each other, alone since last night.

We both act on our own accord as I'm suddenly pressed against the wall, with Tommy's mouth on mine. I grip the back of his neck, my nails tickling his skin as Tommy pins me against the wall with his hips whilst his hands grip whatever he can.

Tommy wastes no time letting his tongue get reacquainted with mine, and I let out a moan at the feeling.

Last time it was soft, gentle, and slow, this time though, this time it's a lot more heated, passionate, and rougher.

"Jump." Tommy mumbles against me, and I do so, wrapping my legs around him as his hands go to my ass to get a steady grip on me.

I can tell he's holding back, almost as if he's refraining himself

"You can be rougher with me, by the way. I'm not made of glass." I quietly tell him, tracing his face with my fingers as we search each others eyes.

"Yeah?" He raises an eyebrow. "How rough?"

"We could set up a safe word?" I suggest.

"Like what?"

"Juggle?"

Tommy laughs before he presses his forehead against mine. "That works."

***

"What the fuck was that?" Tommy asks shocked, trying to catch his breath as his hand trails down the bare skin on my back.

"I don't know but oh my god." I shake my head, resting my forehead on his shoulder.

"This needs to be a regular occurrence, it's too good not to be." Tommy states, throwing his head back in his leather desk chair.

"Definitely." I agree, beginning to catch my breath.

I pull back, looking at Tommy who looks at me with hooded eyes and a small genuine smile, seemingly in a daze; we both are.

"You look pretty like this, no walls up, exposed and genuine." Thomas tells me softly, pushing some hair out of my face before quickly yet gently brushing his lips against mine.

"You're only saying that because I'm naked on top of you." I retort, beginning to have feeling in my legs again after riding him in his chair.

"I've always thought your were the most gorgeous person in the world, you know that, fuck, everyone knows that." He says and my stomach turns into liquid heat.

"Stop." I bashfully reply, burying my face into his neck as he breathes a laugh, continuing to stroke my back.

"You're so cute." He chuckles, kissing the side of my head.

"I've gotta get back to work, as much fun as this was, I like making money." I state, swiftly sliding off his lap and searching for my clothes that are strewn about the room somehow.

"So, what do you think we should do about Mr Parsons?" Tommy asks me, watching me fasten the back of my bra.

"You're not considering doing business with him are you?" I raise an eyebrow at him.

"No, fuck no." He shakes his head, getting up out of his chair to also get dressed. "Can't just let him come out of here with no repercussions."

"Probably just scare him, he didn't necessarily do anything, was just extremely unprofessional and disrespectful." I give him my two cents, before slipping my thick and dark jumper over my head. "But if there's anything that needs blowing up, you know where to find me."

Tommy chuckles as he buttons his shirt up.

"Of course." He nods with a smile, watching me slip into my skirt. "I'll send Finn his way."

"Terrifying." I smirk, finding it hard to believe that the boy I watched grow up could be intimidating.

"You seemed scared of him when he knocked on the door." Tommy teases, brushing his hip against mine as he walks past me.

"Well obviously, you had me up against the wall he was on the other side of; anyone could've caught us." I retort, looking in a mirror to sort my hair out as Tommy seems to have a fascination with it.

"Oh, so you're ashamed of me now are you?" Tommy asks, a teasing glint to blue eyes.

"Yeah, you're my dirty little secret." I laugh, before tying my shoes up.

Tommy tilts his head back to laugh as he slips his blazer back on, both of us looking put together again as if we didn't just have mind blowing sex.

"I'm going to have to kick you out of my office if you're going to speak to me like that." Tommy states, as we both near the door.

"We should really stop fucking on here. Next time my house." I tell him, looking up at him and the funny bright look in his eyes.

"Oh, so their is going to be a next time?" Tommy smirks with a raised eyebrow, look in proud of himself.

"You know as well as I do that there's going to be a next time." I send him a knowing look and he subtly licks his lips, looking pleased. "Can't get rid of you Shelbys if I tried."

Tommy laughs and presses a quick smiley kiss to my lips, "Don't ever change."

That's the start of an extremely natural, fulfilling, fun and sensual relationship. Nothing really changed within our friendship, only that we see each other naked a lot more.

It's definitely brought us closer together. We were extremely close before everything happened but now it feels like we've gotten to a new level, definitely a more intimate level but we're closer than ever before.

It kinda feels like we should've been messing around the whole time, it feels silly that we weren't. What we've got is so much fun and honestly it's a nice stress reliever at the end of the day.

It doesn't feel like we're tarnishing our years long friendship, this feels natural and free flowing.

No one knows, we made that a strict rule. We always try to mess around in the privacy of our own homes, but sometimes when it's late and everyone's gone home we can help ourselves or if tensions get high throughout the day.

I'm pretty sure no one knows. When this all started Ada was visiting and we were slightly sloppy with our secrecy, and she kinda cornered Tommy and I at different times but we got away with it as she never mentioned it again. After that we got our act together and any suspicion that was around died.

It's relatively unexpected from us, although we've expressed our attraction and admiration for each other to other people, we've always said we'd never act on it or that it was even possible to feel anything but appreciation for each other.

I've always joked that it'd be awful to be in a relationship with Tommy and that I'd hate to wake up to him everyday.

We also have another rule to not fall in love, which I laughed at when Tommy asked me to not fall in love with him, and then I told him to not flatter himself.

It's been kinda exciting sneaking around with Tommy. I feel like I'm hiding the resident bad boy of the town from my parents, but in this case it's one of the most dangerous people in the country and I'm sneaking around in front of his family, friends, and co-workers.

We generally don't really see each other outside of work besides on the Sundays that he comes over to my house to get his hair cut. Almost everyday we spend a lot of time together when everyone's gone home or ended their work day, we work together a lot, and I guess we see each other at the pub a lot; but to see each other outside of those premises isn't often. I occasionally go to Thomas' house but not by choice, only if he needs me there or there's a crises or an event going on but if I'm honest I don't like his house, which I've told him before and he always laughs at me because of it.

I love my flat in the heart of Small Heath and you couldn't get me out of their if you tried. I've lived there for years and it's my own place to call home. I could easily afford a house like Tommy's but you'd have to kill me to get me out of my flat.

In recent times, my house has sort of become his residence as he's spent so much time here recently. It's not just sex, we'll sometimes go to my house after work or after some evening entertainment, have a meal or just talk which leads to sex, and then half the time Tommy will stay the night; which leads to us having to sneak into work together without raising any suspicions.

Like now, it's honestly too often you'd find Tommy in my bed the morning after as the sun is beginning to shine through my bedroom windows, talking in quiet voices and having a few laughs.

Letting out a soft laugh at Tommy, I rub my hand over my face wake myself up a little bit more.

It's well into the morning, Tommy and I are lying in my bed, surrounded by sun spots that are pouring through my worn French windows, the Birmingham bustle is in full swing a few floors below us that we can hear small swings of from the window that is just slightly open, yet it's calm and quiet in this plant ridden room.

Just our quiet voices as if we were confessing our darkest secrets with the occasional stranger's shouty voice drifting through the window, and soft touches like we're handling a rare and ancient piece of history.

"Do you miss it?" Tommy asks as we're going through old memories.

"I miss my only worries being if Matthew Kennedy liked be back or not and being young and carefree, but I also love my life right now." I reply.

"Oh yeah, you planned out your wedding, how many kids you were gonna have and everything." Tommy laughs, his eyes glazed over as he thinks back to simpler times.

"It was gonna be outside with as many flowers as possible and we were gonna have 3 children, twin girls and a boy." I chuckle along with him, looking up at the crisp white ceiling. "But it turned out he was a shit kisser and only wanted to see my bed."

"I can still remember the black eye you gave him for that." Tommy grins, almost proudly.

"Deserved it, knob." I shake my head as he snickers before pulling me into him with the arm under me, curling me into his side, leaving the cracked open window to tickle my bare back with soft gusts of air.

"You're so violent." Tommy mumbles, pressing a gentle kiss to my hairline.

"Only to those that deserve it, which is a lot." I explain, before looking up at him. "So I can see how you got confused in perceiving me as a violent person, it's okay, Tom."

He send me an annoyed look as his fingers trace my back.

"You're so annoying, I've never met someone who annoys me so much." Tommy shakes his head, but despite his words his fingers stay consistent in tracing my back, running over my scars and smooth skin.

"You love it." I grin up at him.

All he does is grunt in response.

We lapse into a comfortable silence, with my head rested on his shoulder and my body pressed against his side whilst he has his arm wrapped around me, almost sending me to sleep again with his soft hands tracing my body.

"I can't believe you took a bullet for me." Thomas breaks the silence, running his fingers over the scar in my back.

"Only by accident." I reply, still slightly pissed off, making Tommy chuckle.

"Well if you hadn't moved I'd be dead." He states, looking up at the ceiling and easy smile on his face.

"And to think that you thought I was joking when it happened and you laughed." I shake my head, not being able help my smile.

I still remember that day as clear as ever.

We were outside the betting den with Arthur and Michael and I went to give Tommy a hug before I said goodbye and left but as we went to embrace each other I got a bullet straight into the back. I originally crashed into him and he thought I was joking before I crashed to the floor and my blood soaked my flowery blouse, that's when the laughter died.

"I said I was sorry!" Tommy claims, sounding anything but sorry. "I took care of you in the end though."

"You tripped as you entered the door, you knob!" I counteract, remembering how I was losing blood rapidly soaking his shirt, and as I was in his arms I laughed when he tripped nearly falling over.

"I was only trying." Tommy pouts, brushing his knuckles against my shoulder.

"Thank you." I breathe a small laugh before pressing a feather like kiss to his collarbone.

"You're not welcome." He jokes, before grabbing his first cigarette of the day.

Rolling out of his arms and onto my side of the bed, I do the biggest stretch known to man along with a loud and long groan. When I open my eyes, Tommy's giving me a look which I only grin at to annoy him, laying my head on my folded forearms as I lie on my stomach; I can't help but sigh as all I want to do I stay in the bed all day, preferably with him, not that I'd ever tell him that.

"Want one?" Tommy asks, offering his cigarettes to me.

"You know I don't smoke before 11." I tell him.

"I still don't get why." He shakes his head, exhaling the smoke.

"Habit." I shrug, knowing that it doesn't make any sense but I still do it anyway.

Running my fingers through my hair, I glance at my wardrobe, knowing that I should get ready sooner than later. Shuffling up onto my knees, I make my way over to Tommy's side of the bed as my wardrobe is situated on the left side of the room, I swing my leg over his, taking a brief pew on his thighs.

"You need your hair cut." I note, combing through his slight bed-head hair with my slender fingers.

"I know, but someone keeps putting it off." Tommy drawls, sending me a brief look be for he taps off the ash from his cigarette.

"It's not my fault that you come over to do it but you end up doing me instead." I chuckle, and he smiles.

"What can I say, it's just more fun."

I roll my eyes with a fond a smile before I go to get off Tommy's lap and venture out of this unbelievably comfortable bed but Tommy stops me by placing his hands on my hips, locking me in place.

"Yes?" I raise an eyebrow.

Tommy presses his lips against mine, pulling me in for a sensual, gentle morning kiss which leaves me breathless and wanting more. So much more. His touch is softer than ever as he cups my face in one hand and trails the other over the skin of my waist.

"That's all." Tommy shrugs, brushing his nose against mine with a small smile.

I mirror his smile and capture his lips one last time before I finally get out of bed, making my way over to my wardrobe and pull both doors open, my eyes darting over the hangers.

Picking out a dark dress with bright coloured flowers that has slight and subtle bell bottom sleeves, I shimmy into that before I make my way across the room to look out the window.

"Aw, it looks like it's going to rain." I frown, closing the window.

Tommy puts out his cigarette and gets out of bed, joining me at the window. "When doesn't it?"

"True," I shrug, then turn my back to Tommy. "Can you do me up?"

"Mhm." He hums and begins to do the buttons of my dress up.

"Thank you." I flash him a grateful smile and make my way over towards my vanity to do my make up as Tommy starts to change into one of the handful of suits that he leaves at my house.

This has sort of become the norm for us, Tommy spends the night, we spend a little too much time in bed in the morning until we ultimately have to get ready do the day and we have some banter whilst we get dressed and ready, the friendly banter is usually halted with kisses that make me feel warm inside as well as make my toes curl which always throws me off with how we can go from being best friends to acting like a couple in seconds.

I guess we are called friends with benefits.

Then we go downstairs and I make him breakfast, we talk about anything that's going on around us, business or people before our day starts and as soon as my front door swings open, we resort back to being best friends like we've always been, as if the night before didn't happen.

It didn't start like that.

At first it was strictly just sex. He'd only stay for a couple hours unless I really wore him out and he'd stay the night as much as he didn't particularly want to. We were kind of keeping it a secret from ourselves, reserving it strictly for behind closed doors, you wouldn't of suspected a thing; we slowly began moving forward, we stayed the night more, touches weren't just for nightfall anymore, and we knew where we stood with each other.

We don't refrain from showing each other affection anymore. Before this all happened Tommy and I would go through phases of giving each other affection but now it's different. I'd place a lot of money down for a bet to see if Tommy could walk past me without brushing his hand over my waist or back; he just subconsciously does it every time.

Sometimes there are moments where Tommy will be speaking with someone across the room or there's a family - even though I'm not family - meeting, and all I wanna do is just kiss him.

"You look nice." Tommy comments, coming up behind me as I'm putting some earrings in in front of my vanity mirror, bowing down to look at what I'm doing.

"Thank you." I reply as Tommy wraps his arms around my waist and leans down to press his chin to my shoulder blade, looking at me through the mirror. "You look alright."

Tommy flashes me a boyish smile before pecking the skin showing through the little triangle cut out in the back of my dress.

***

"See you tomorrow." I send Polly a smile when she makes her way out of the workplace.

"Bye, love." She mirrors my smile and closes the door behind her, leaving just a few Peakys peaking around.

Casting my eyes back to my desk, I carry on with my important task at hand before it swallows me whole.

As time goes by I sink further into my chair, the lights get softer as more people leave and my workload goes down. A loud groan disrupts my flow and it sounds like it's coming from Tommy's office.

Pushing my chair out, I head over Tommy's way not bothering to knock and I find him leaning back in his chair, looking stressed and defeated. His head whips up to look at me, his hard eyes softening when he sees it's just me.

"Why's it so dark in here?" I raise an eyebrow, noting the few lamps that are on in here, casting the room in a subtle orange glow when I walk towards him.

"Hurts my eyes." Tommy grumbles and I round his desk, taking a seat on his lap, his hand grazing my ass in the process.

"What's got you so gloomy?" I enquire, pressing a quick kiss to his jaw, feeling some tension release from his body as he settles into me.

"Just so much to do, so little time." Tommy replies with a soft sigh, placing his hand on my thigh and with his other hand he brushes some hair that got caught on my lipstick before he settles it around me.

"Seems that's how life's going these days." I mumble softly, sweeping the hair off of Tommy's forehead, causing him to close his eyes momentarily. "You should be careful not to overwork yourself, Tom. You make shit decisions when you're tired."

"What can I say? You tire me out." Tommy says with a fond smirk and slightly hooded eyes.

"You're a piece of work, got to put you to bed somehow." I fire back, matching his smirk.

Pressing my lips to the sensitive skin on his neck, working my way up towards his sharp jawline, Tommy lets out a satisfied sigh, beginning to properly relax. Connecting our lips in a sweet and short kiss, Tommy squeezes my thigh as I kiss him one time, two times, three times before going back to his neck.

"Mr Shelby?" Someone calls from behind the closed door with a hesitant knock.

We're too far gone to really care who it is or what they want so Tommy sighs and grants them entrance as I continue to work my magic on him. In comes a new lower ranked Peaky Blinder who's eyes widen at the sight of us, which it would be shocking to see us right now as everyone assumes we're still just best friends but here I am sat comfortably on Tommy's lap, marking him up.

"What can I do for you, Frank?" Thomas questions, trailing his hand up my thigh.

This poor boy is speechless, not knowing how to react and he looks like he wants to get out of this room as soon as possible.

"Uh, I just came in here to tell you that I've uh finished everything you asked me to do and it uhh all went smoothly." Frank states with anything but confidence.

"Great, thanks." Tommy responds, tilting his head to the side to give me more space.

Frank escapes the room as soon as possible and I chuckle at the hard working boy. We both know that he'd never utter a word to anyone about what he saw, that's why we didn't freak out. The boy want to go up in this company and he'll do anything to please anyone higher than him; he's too gentle and easily persuaded for this world.

"Is that everyone gone?" Tommy asks me.

"Should be." I confirm with a small nod.

"Perfect."

The next thing I feel is Tommy's hand creeping up my skirt.

***

"What?" Tommy utters, staring at a lower ranked Peaky Blinder with an ice cold stare.

"It's not my fault! I tried to get him to agree but---"

"Not your fault? This whole plan went down the drain because of you!" Tommy states, not believing the man.

"He had a gun to my head, what was I supposed to do?!" Matthew asks outraged.

"You should taken someone fucking with you, not just thought that you knew best! You need a wake up call because if you want to remain in this company you should know that that shit doesn't fly around here. Could've taken John, Arthur, Cora, fuck, even Michael for fuck sake, not just make decisions as you go along." Thomas retorts, frustrated beyond belief as he rubs his hands over his face.

"What's all the shouting about?" Polly questions as she comes up beside me from being in another room.

"Mathew fucked up and gave away Tommy's plans and shit, along with some other stuff that i don't quite know the details of, so Tom's losing his shit." I fill her in, looking up at her from where I'm sitting and she's standing.

"How the fuck did that happen?" She asks, confused.

"He ran into some trouble on the way or something, I'm not sure, I only came in half way through." I take an unsure guess.

"Men." She shakes her head, letting out a sigh.

"Boys." I correct, making her cackle as she turns to move further into the room.

"I don't need a babysitter, and I sure as hell am not gonna take a female with me." Mathew states in defence, his so called manhood damaged by the thought of a woman being able to do his job better than him.

Tommy huffs a small laugh.

"I wear heels bigger than your dick!" I joke from across the room, not taking his serious comment seriously.

"Just get out of my sight before I force you to." Tommy huffs, turning around and heading up to his office, not being gentle with the door as he closes it behind him.

"I'll go talk to him." I roll my eyes, getting up out of my chair, grabbing the knife from off my desk with me. "And you..." I start, showing Mathew my weapon. "Try not to be a sexist twat next time you're even vaguely threatened by a woman. We hold a lot more power than you can, so remember that next time." I give him a sly wink as I twirl the extremely sharp knife around my fingers.

Heading into Tommy's office, I lean against the door after I close it, watching Tommy lean over his desk, head hung low, tension present in his muscles.

"What is it with people not sticking to the plan?" Tommy grumbles, not bothering to turn around and face me.

"Some people think they know best, I guess." I say, coming up behind him and wrapping my arms around his waist, feeling some tension leave his body.

"He's my employee, this is not what I'm employing him for. I'm not paying him to fuck up." Tommy shakes his head as I press my cheek against his back.

"I know." I say, knowing he doesn't really want me to say anything, he just needs comforting and someone to vent to.

"This whole plan has gone to shit, I've spent weeks trying to perfect it, and the easiest task got fucked." He huffs.

"You shouldn't of trusted him to it, the man can't even tie a tie." I state, looking out of the window.

"I just thought I'd give him a chance, a try, whatever, but I shouldn't of." Tommy replies, lifting his head up.

"You learn from these things, got to know where you stand with the people around you." I tell him, moving my hands from around his waist to hooking under his shoulders.

"I guess, but I just expected more from him." Tommy responds.

And so I let my best friend vent some more, not just about this incident but anything that's on his mind, only replying when I feel the need to, and I think it worked because he's not all worked up anymore, the tension has dropped in his body, and he seems at peace.

"Thank you." Tommy utters, taking my face in his hands.

"For what?" I breathe a small laugh, holding onto his forearms.

"For just always being there for me, day or night, for the big things and the small things, I don't know how I could ever thank you enough." He says, stepping into my bubble, looking more sincere than ever.

"You do the same for me, that's more than enough." I assure, looking deep into his deep blue eyes. "Thank you for being my best friend."

Tommy smiles a small smile, before giving me a kiss, pulling me impossibly close to him, both of our smiles growing.

***

Glancing over towards the clock on the bedside table, seeing the time reads 6:30, I've got a long day ahead of me and I need to catch up on quite a few things as I seem to be slacking because I've been spending all my time with the duvet hogger to the left of me.

Granted it's not my house or room so I have no claim on it, but I seem to spend more time here than my own house; it feels more like home here, anyway.

Letting out a quiet yawn, I look over at Cora next to me, seeing how she's dead to the world looking effortlessly gorgeous whilst she's fast asleep. Her dark hair is splayed out on her pillow, her long eyelashes resting on her cheeks, and her bare shoulders are poking out of the duvet, with a small sun spot shining on her, and she just looks so pretty.

It feels weird not waking up next to her nowadays, it feels so natural seeing her warming up the other half of either mine or her's bed.

Sitting up, I shuffle out of bed and start to get dressed and I can't help but think of how I could get used to this.

Beginning to get ready for the day without waking up Cora, I don't bother with breakfast as I just don't have the time. Doing a once over in the mirror, I head over to Cora who's half awake to let her know that I'm leaving.

"Cora, lovie." I say softly, placing my hand on her exposed arm.

"Hm?" She hums, giving me a peak of her green eyes as she purses her lips briefly.

"'M gonna head into work now, I'll see you later on, eh?" I inform, watching her slowly wake up.

"Okay, have fun." Cora wishes, readjusting the sheet on her bare chest.

"Oh I'll try." I joke, brushing some hair away from her face with a fond smile. "I'll see you later." I tell her, planting a quick kiss on her lips.

She chuckles.

"Look at us, like an old married couple, who'd of thought?"

"Terrifying." I laugh, asking her laugh as I leave the room with a smile on my face that stays on my face until I open the front door, and as I'm walking to work I can't help but think that that doesn't sound so bad.

Leaning back in my chair, I grab a cigarette and flick my lighter against the end, quickly exhaling what I inhale before clearing my throat a little.

"I look forward to what the future holds for us, Mr Shelby." Mr Cliffo states, clearly chuffed with the way this meeting went.

"As do I, Mr Cliffo, as do I." I reply, wanting to get him out of my office as soon as possible as I've still got so much to do today.

"You've got a nice thing going on here, great business attitude, trust worthy co workers, it seems like your family really has its heart in this company." Mr Cliffo drawls, looking around the room.

"Yes, all of us here believe in this company and always want to strive closer towards our goals and ambitions." I nod, bringing my cigarette to my mouth again.

"I have to ask as curiosity has gotten the best of me, where's the woman that usually attends our meetings?" Mr Cliffo questions, and I sigh, it seems like everyone takes interest in my best friend nowadays.

She's extremely captivating and has a mysterious aura to her, Cora just has this way of drawing you in and making you want to know as much about her as possible.

"Busy." I inform, watching him carefully, how he has a ghost of smile on his face and seemingly looking back on his few interactions with her.

"I've missed her little quips and ideas." He tells me.

Widening my eyes as I let out an exasperated huff, I stand up and head towards the door, hopefully giving him the hint to get the fuck out of my office.

Which he does, so he stands up whilst doing the buttons of his blazer up, approaching me by the door.

"Pretty little thing she is." He says fondly, but not in a creepy way just a genuine compliment.

"She's certainly a head turner." I nod, not being able to deny it.

"Well, I must get going, errands to run." Mr Cliffo states and opens the door. "I'm sensing a promising future here, Mr Shelby."

"I'll look forward to it." I say, escorting him out to hurry him up.

We enter the main room where everyone seems to be, the shouting across the room and bustling noises greet us.

"Have a good day, Mr Shelby." Mr Cliffo bids and we shake hands briefly before he leaves, leaving me to head into John's office to relay some information about the meeting I just had.

"Good meeting?" John questions as I lean against the door frame.

"As good as a meeting with Mr Cliffo can go." I half joke, folding my arms.

"Still a boring middle aged fuck?" John laughs, dropping his pen.

"More of less." I confirm with a small chuckle.

I'm half way through telling John about what happened and our plans when there's a commotion on the other side of the room. I look over my shoulder and find Cora pinning Mr Cliffo against the wall with the knife that she keeps in her stockings under his chin

He looks sheepish, slightly terrified, and completely taken of guard whilst she looks dangerous, pissed off and not the slightest bit hesitant.

"What the fuck is goin' on?" John enquires, joining me in the doorway. "Fuck yeah, I love when she brings the knives out." He practically cheers for her.

"Touch me or any of the woman in here again and you won't see the next sunrise." Cora promises, and in some weird way I can't help but smile a little as she looks so natural at this.

"What's some woman gonna do?" Mr Cliffo attempts to belittle her in order to save his so called manhood.

That's not what he was saying about her earlier.

Cora sharply brings her knee to his crotch making him pale and let out an agonising groan. The impact enough to make any man wince.

"First time a woman's touched your dick in years, is it?" She taunts, pushing the knife into his skin.

He can't get any words out, clearly in too much pain.

"What? Cat got your tongue?" She all but smirks. "Get out of here before you do something you'll regret." Cora states and Mr Cliffo stumbles out of the door, no doubt planning to avoid this building for the rest of his life.

"Fucking hell, I learnt the day I met her not to fuck with Cora Witton and I'm still scared of her." John tells me, subtly interlacing his hands over his crotch making me breathe a laugh.

"Ladies." Cora grins at the women who she just protected from Mr Cliffo, and they mirror her smile.

"She may be small but she will hurt you." I comment watching her tuck her knife back in her stocking, not caring that people can see.

"No hesitation." John adds before he goes back to his desk.

"What the fuck were you thinking doing business with him?" Cora questions as she comes up to me, not mad just curious.

"We've worked with him before, thought I'd take it further." I shrug.

"And after each meeting he grabs my ass." She rolls her eyes, mirroring my folded arms.

"That's him?" I raise an eyebrow, surprised.

"Kinda." She nods, widening her eyes.

"Sorry, I didn't know, lovie." I say softly before kissing her cheek breifly. "This is why I need you in my meetings, give me honest and better judgement."

"Speaking of which, business is done and dealt with, Finn and Isiah are just finishing it up." Cora informs.

"Did it go smoothly?" I question, staring down at her.

"More or less." She nods and she's about to explain before Michael calls her over. "I'll tell you later." Cora tells me, gently fixing my tie before she heads over to Michael.

"You're close." John states, a teasing tone creeping into his voice along with the growing smirk.

"Fuck off." I grumble and leave his doorway, entering mine.

***

"Hi." Cora sings when she enters my office, an unfamiliar baby on her hip.

"Who's this?" I question, leaning back in my chair.

"My neighbour's son." She says, tucking some blonde hair behind the baby's ear.

"It's illegal to take people's children, Cora." I tell her, smiling when she rolls her eyes.

"My neighbour needed someone to watch him for like 15 minutes." She informs, sitting down in the chair opposite me, situating the young boy on her lap who's fascinated with the bracelet on her wrist.

"What's his name?"

"Ronnie."

"Is this the neighbour that complained about the noise?" I ask, with a cheeky smirk

"Yeah, I still can't look them in the eye." She bashfully answers, smiling through the pain.

I laugh as I look back on that experience, it traumatised her so much that we did all our rendezvous on my house for the next month until people started getting suspicious so we went back to her house most of the time.

"You do a lot of things, Cora, yet you can't look your neighbour in the eyes because they heard us one time." I state, amused.

"Uh, I highly doubt it was just the once." She confidently claims.

"Why don't you just move somewhere more remote?" I suggest, already knowing the answer.

"I can't! I love my place, you know that." Cora replies, readjusting Ronnie on her lap. "Isn't that right, Mr Ronnie?" She coos.

I rest my chin on my palm, hiding my smile behind my knuckles. She looks like such a natural with him and seeing her with a baby makes a weird thought come into mind and I can't help but entertain that thought.

Half of me and half of her, dear god help the child who's cursed with that.

A sarcastic and cocky bastard riddled with trauma and seemingly never ending problems.

I'm not planning on having a child with Cora ever, but the idea is entertaining and gives me an odd feeling.

She'd be an amazing mum, she would do anything for anyone that she loves, and to receive her love is one of the greatest things in the world. As I'm looking at her now, I want some of that.

I'd like a beautiful baby who's half me and half her.

"What you daydreaming about, Shelby?" Cora brings me out of the thoughts I'd never utter to her.

"Nothing." I shake my head, and try to busy myself with the work in front of me.

"In all the years I've known you, Tommy, there's always something in your head." Cora says knowingly, a teasing smile creeping on her face.

"Not true." I deceive.

"I'll find out, some day, I always do."

Not even over my dead body.

"Are you coming over tonight?" She questions, crossing her legs.

"Depends, do you want me to?" I retort, looking over at her.

"I think you know the answer to that." Cora tells me, meeting my eyes, a sly glint prevalent in her eyes.

"No?" I guess.

"Of course I do." She chuckles, her smile lighting up the room.

"Tell you what, I'll finish this in the next... 20 minutes/half an hour then we'll head over to your flat, and see where the evening takes us." I suggest, despite the fact that I still got at least a third of work to do today but this girl just does things to me.

"You and I both know exactly where the evening will take us." Cora laughs, running her hand through her hair.

"The sooner we're out of here, the sooner we can get there." I reply, sending her a knowing look.

"Sounds like a plan." Cora grins, gathering Ronnie before leaving the room.

***

"Ready?" I ask, brushing my hand over Cora's shoulder as I walk past her.

"Mhm, just need to give this to Michael." She hums, getting out of her chair to head over to Michael as I get my coat.

"Where are you two going?" Polly muses, leaning back almost smugly in her chair, a cigarette burning in her fingers.

"Home." I answer, turning to look at her.

"Early for you." Polly acknowledges, looking as if she knows something I don't.

"Maybe so, Pol, maybe so." I nod as Cora walks over towards us.

"Ready?" She questions and I nod before I guide us out of here by draping my arm over her shoulders, opening the front door, seeing its beginning to rain. "Shit, I didn't bring a coat." Cora pouts.

"I did." I smugly say, stepping outside and she tugs at the sleeves of her dress until she steps out, too.

We begin to walk the 15 minute walk to Cora's place, chatting about random things on the way, the rain only getting heavier; luckily we're sheltered by the roofs of the houses hanging over the pavement.

"No one annoys me more than my sister, not even you and you're really high up there, like too high." She tells me, making me grin, that's my favourite pastime.

"It's just so easy to do, nothing amuses me more than when you're annoyed." I chuckle, looking down at her annoyed glare and feigning pain when she punches me in the arm, watching her fold her arms to keep herself warm.

"I retract my statement, you annoy me the mos---" she cuts herself off when I drape my coat over her shoulders. "Tommy Shelby, you're so romantic." Cora laughs, a teasing glint in her eyes.

"I try." I mumble, with a small smile as we turn a corner.

"Fuckin' hell, rain's giving no mercy." She points out, and we both look out at the rain that's pelting down, making puddles and leaking through unlucky people's roofs.

Luckily we're sheltered by said roofs; for now.

Grabbing Cora's hand, I pull her out of the protection of the roofs into the rain, making her squeal and laugh which is just music to my ears as I laugh along with her.

"Tommy!" She exclaims and I pull her into my arms, pressing her against me as our hair and clothes get soaked.

"Cora!" I imitate to annoy her, as she wraps her arms loosely around my neck, bringing us even closer. I look into her eyes, seeing how carefree she looks, how much her face is lit up, the smile that always makes me weak in the knees, and how happy she looks, it makes me unbelievably happy. "Kiss me."

"What? Out in open? People can see us, rumours will spread." Cora tells me as she sweeps some soaked hair off my forehead and to the side.

"So? People are already suspicious." I shrug, cupping her cheek. "Kiss me."

She breathes a laugh before pressing her lips to mine, the both of us smiling into it.

I've never smiled as much as the time I spend with this girl.

We stand in the middle of the road, raining cats and dogs on us, intertwined with each other, more than just physically, out in the open.

Pulling back slowly, we take each other in with soft eyes and smiles, and as I'm looking at her right now, all I can feel is love.

I'm in love with my best friend.

Deeply in love.

I could call myself crazy but the way she's looking at me right now and how she's making me feel, I'd say she feels the exact same.

The words are on the tip of my tongue, aching to be said but I'm not brave enough, so I settle with kissing her again instead.

I'm scared to the bone but I'm also kind of revelling in it as it's a new feeling and fuck does it feel good.

"You look pretty in the rain."

"As do you."

***

After a successful business move that we've all been hard at work on for the past month, that called for a celebration, right? Which is why we're in The Garrison this evening, nestled in the private room full of Shelbys, Grays, and a few other Peakys including myself.

Which is predictably chaos.

"To business." Michael toasts, holding his drink up.

"To business." We all toast, clinking glasses.

"Michael, for fucks sake, you've made that toast like 10 times tonight." John groans, rubbing his forehead clearly exasperated.

"I'm a little drunk, and you keep joining so you're all as bad as me." Michael states, and there's some truth to his words.

We're all a little drunk, some more than others. Not to name names or anything but I'm definitely looking at Arthur, Finn and possibly Polly, not to mention Michael. The rest of us are tipsy, definitely feeling the buzz in our systems, but not off our face.

Although that might change as the night goes on.

"To business!" Arthur vindicates, and I groan, making Tommy chuckle.

"On behalf of my family, I am so sorry." Tommy jokes from beside me.

"What is it with you Shelbys and your liquor?" I question, leaning my head on his shoulder as I look at him.

"Born with it in our bloodstreams." Tommy tells me, brushing his fingertips against my arm as his arm is draped around the back of my part of the booth.

We're kind of in our own bubble in the corner, occasionally piping up with a quip or an opinion but we're mainly talking to each other like we've always done in these sort of circumstances.

"I assume you came out of the womb with a cigarette too, right?" I tease, crossing my legs.

"Yeah, the midwife was waiting with a match." He jokes with a small laugh, his smile staying on his face.

"I can't imagine you as a child. Of course I've known you since we were in year 9, and I'd seen you around a few times in secondary school, but to imagine you as an 8 year old is really hard." I tell him, smiling at the thought.

"Well first of all I was adorable, let's get that out of the way." Tommy states, trying to conceal his smirk.

"You still are!" I tease, earning myself a blank look.

"The ladies loved me." He continues.

"Even with your bad haircut?" I laugh, I've heard so much about his haircuts in the past that family members did for him.

"That's what brought them in, you whore." Tommy laughs which makes me laugh.

"Of course, all that extra hair just propelled these so called ladies to you."

"Exactly." He confirms as if it's obvious. "I've heard stories from your childhood from your family or partners." Tommy informs, a mischievous look in his eyes

"You know only what I want you to know."

"You're forgetting that I know every single thing about you, everything." Tommy says, nudging his knee against mine.

"I highly doubt that, every single thing? Really?" I question, nudging him back.

"Yeah."

"How old was I when I stopped hating you?" I test him, turning slightly to look at him.

"Trick question, you never stopped." Tommy answers, grinning because he knows he's right and I huff. "Yet you still suck my dick almost every night." He mumbles, making me punch him which only makes him laugh.

"I don't hear you complaining." I retort.

"I'd never." Tommy shakes his head. "Why don't we go back to your place and I'll show you how appreciative I am." He suggest, placing his hand on my thing under the table.

"Don't you want to celebrate with your family?" I question, looking over at everyone who's more or less plastered.

"Lovie, you are my celebration." Tommy tells me fondly, tucking some hair behind my ear.

This is the thing with Tommy. He can make you feel so special and make you feel like you're the only person in the room, despite the fact that it's filled with loads of people. He can set off a load of fireworks inside of you without even really trying.

"How about you meet me in the back room in five minutes..." Tommy suggests, sending me a mischievous smile.

"Sounds like a plan." I reply, matching his smile.

"I'm gonna go get more alcohol." Tommy announces, but no one's really listening, and Tommy leaves the room, leaving me alone with his family.

"I'm so glad that I never have to talk to another Bulgarian in my life." Finn says, as I tune into the family's conversation.

"What if you fall in love with one one day?" I question and he turns to me.

"Simply impossible." Finn shakes his head.

"You can't control who you love; you can lie to yourself, deny yourself of it, but it'll always be there." I tell him, sitting up straight ready to go.

"You can definitely control who you love, I can also choose who, when, and where." Finn disagrees, taking a sip of his drink.

"Okay, say you chose to fall in love with the old lady that lives next door to you. Could you do that?" I question, watching him falter as everyone chuckles at him.

"What do you know about love anyway?" Finn asks in a grumble, downing the rest of his drink.

I know a little something about unrequited love.

"I got proposed to." I retort, sending him an obvious look.

"Which you laughed at before walking away from him." He argues, with a laugh.

"Broke the poor guy's heart in front of everyone." Arthur stifles a laugh, refilling his glass.

"Who proposes after 2 years together?" I question, folding my arms.

"Loads of people." John answers, an amused look on his face.

"Shit, maybe I don't know much about love." I join the laughter almost sheepishly.

"I love being in love, it's one of the best feelings in the world." Polly states, leaning back in her chair with a dazed look in her eyes.

"Love is whenever something happens in your life, good or bad, you immediately want to tell them. When you know you can go to them for anything. Knowing you can do anything and they'll always be there for you. When they can always make you laugh, despite anything. Just feeling at home with them, basically. Love is when they're your home." Arthur despite being drunk, eloquently speaks.

My mind instantly goes to Tommy.

He's all of that.

Always has been.

"Love is never far, it's always closer than you think." Polly states, and I look over at her and find that she's already looking at me. Her eyes boring into my soul.

"The only things I love in my life is me and my flat." I announce, and get up to go meet Tommy.

"What about me?" Finn questions, looking up at me with puppy-like look adorning his face.

"Aww." I smile and ruffle his hair. "No."

Opening the door to be greeted with the rest of The Garrison that isn't closed off, I step out and close the door behind me, my eyes scanning the room. Rolling my eyes when I see Tommy talking to some guy at the bar.

He spots me as I approach him, a small smile quirking at his mouth.

"Sorry, I've got some business to attend to." Tommy excuses himself and swiftly yet subtly follows me through the room.

"Is that what I am now? Business?" I tease, as we're out of earshot from anyone around us.

"No, you're a lot more fun than business." Tommy says, grabbing my hand as we push past the doors that lead to the backrooms down the long corridor.

"I don't know, sometimes you get quite excited when things are going well." I tell him, making him laugh which resonates in this empty corridor. "Although---"

I'm cut off by Tommy pressing me up against the wall as he attaches his mouth to mine eagerly. Cupping his face, I match his pace and pull him closer as he buries his fingers in my hair and pins me against the wall with his hips.

"You're so pretty, lovie." Tommy whispers, making me grin.

"So are you." I chuckle, knowing how much he hates when I call him pretty despite the tiny blush that flushes his cheeks.

"You just love to remind me that you're my best friend, don't you?" He asks with a smile.

"Yeah." I laugh and kiss him again before Tommy begins to guide us to a more private area as our kiss begins to heat up and hands are roaming.

The door slams against the wall as we enter a storage room that is surprisingly clean, the heavy wooden door closes itself and Tommy and I stumble our way through the room as our bodies heat up until we hit a wall, I let out a breathy moan at the sensation of being able to feel ever curve and dip of Tommy.

Disconnecting our lips, Tommy dips his head to attach his mouth to my neck as I pant, beginning to fiddle with the buttons of my dress.

"Uh, Tommy? Cora?" A voice hesitantly speaks up, and we freeze.

You could hear a pin drop.

I look to my left and see Michael staring at us with wide eyes, looking scared yet too shocked to really form an opinion.

"Hi, Michael." I sheepishly greet as Tommy drops his head to my shoulder in defeat briefly.

"Has this been going on this whole time?" Michael asks after some silence, rubbing his nose.

"What are you even doing here anyway, Michael?" Tommy asks, turning to face him.

"I was uh... meeting a friend." Michael says. "Not your kind of friend though."

I look past him and see the small container splayed out on some stacked up pallets. "Friend, really?"

"Yep." He nods, inhaling sharply as he refuses to look us in the eyes.

"Not doing lines off old rotting pallets?" I suggest, putting my weight on one foot.

"To--- Who are you to judge me when you guys are fucking or whatever under people's noses?" Michael accuses, acting out. "Has this been going this whole time? You've been sneaking around for years?"

"What does it matter to you?" Tommy and I say simultaneously.

"Are guys together or what?" Michael questions, looking between us.

Tommy and I look at each other, not being able to come up with an answer.

"How does it concern you with what we do privately?" Tommy questions, looking pissed.

"I don't know about priva---"

I cut Michael off as I push him against the wall, swiftly pulling my knife out and holding I under his chin whilst I have my hand pressed against his collar. "You say a fucking word to anyone, your mum, your friends, your butcher, your fucking dentist and you'll be fresh meat." I warn as I look into his blown out eyes. "Understand?"

"Cora---"

"Understand?" I repeat, pressing the blade into his skin.

"Yes, I won't utter a word!" Michael conforms, keeping eye contact.

"Good." I grin, and affectionately clap his cheek. "Tell your mum I'll be in late tomorrow." I inform as I put away my knife before stepping back to Tommy, who runs his hand down my back and rests it on the small of my back.

"We're trusting you, Michael." Tommy tells him, giving him a stern look before we head out the door.

"Stay off the snow will you, Michael?" I suggest over my shoulder before the door slams shut.

"You're so violent, like my little weapon." Tommy teases, intertwining our fingers and I squeeze his hand lightly.

"How much do you trust him?" I question, as we walk down the long corridor.

"As long as we've got you around, I'd say 100 per cent." Tommy jokes. "As long as we don't have any interactions like that again, I'd say he's pretty trust worthy."

"Right." I nod, taking in his words. "Back to my house?"

"We're still celebrating, aren't we?" Tommy states, making me chuckle but it's short lived as I can't help but frown when he drops my hand as we enter the open again.

My heart sinks.

"Just wanna remind you that we've got a wedding next week." Tommy says and I roll my eyes.

You forget one important shoot out that's been planned for months and suddenly he has to remind you of every important thing for the rest of time.

"You didn't propose though?" I reply, gliding through groups of people.

"I didn't?" He raises an eyebrow, looking down at me with a small smirk.

"No, you didn't." I shake my head, smiling.

"Oh, shame, you look good in white."

***

"Well Arthur, the big day's come." I say, as I flip my collar up to put my tie on.

"Indeed, it has indeed." Arthur nods, taking a seat on the large ottoman in the middle of the room.

"Our Arthur's finally settling down, eh?" John smirks as he looks in the mirror to do his hair again.

"God help Linda." Finn grumbles, slipping into his blazer.

"Already is." John widens his smirk.

"I don't see any of you getting married so fuck off." Arthur replies, disregarding John.

"To be fair, he's got a point... god can only do so much." I state, tightening my tie and putting my collar down.

"Oi, you can barely keep your woman on the reigns." Arthur retorts, pointing a finger at me, as the others snicker.

"I've not got a woman." I reply although I know who and what they're talking about.

"You know, the girl you're always around." Arthur tells me, and I huff with a small smile at their tomfoolery.

"You mean the girl who punched you and you practically cried when she was like 14?" I ask, pulling my cigarettes out.

"She'd fucking kill you if she knew you were talking about her like this, Arthur." Finn says, smirking.

"Even if she were my so called woman, not that you'd ever be able to make her conform to that title, she cannot be owned. Not just because of feminism but she's too wild for that, she'd also punch me and that hurts." I state, lighting my cigarette.

"I think it's the other way 'round." John muses, gesturing with his cigar. "She's got you on the reigns."

"Have any of you lot seen Cora?" Polly asks as she bursts into the room, dressed in a fancy dress.

"No."

"Not seen her all morning."

"Not seen her since this morning."

"Me either."

"Fuck sake. She can do everything but turn up on time." Polly grumbles, shaking her head. "Well come on then. Time's getting on and the bride won't wait forever."

We all exit the room one by one, following Polly through the building but we stop short when we see Cora stepping into the entrance hall, looking up at the ceiling as she lights a cigarette, showcasing the thin but long scar on her throat that gave me nightmares when it happened.

"Shelbys!" She beams when she sees us, taking a drag of her cigarette, looking temptingly appetising.

"What time do you call this, Witton?" Polly barks, sending daggers Cora's way.

"There's plenty of time! Don't worry about it." Cora waves Polly off but all I can focus on is how good she looks.

Her dress has a few layers of thin, see through tulle with flowers embroidered into it, the underneath is a champagne sort of pink coloured dress that shines through subtly, the length sinks all the way down to her feet, it's cinched in at the waist with a controversial slit at the side showcasing her leg, and her sleeves are made of the same see through tulle that hangs off her shoulders to tickle her elbow in waves. Her hair is pinned up with a handful of thick curls dangling around her face, and her make up is subtle which really makes her green eyes pop.

She looks like an angel to put it simply.

"Careful, you'll catch flies." John smirks, elbowing me.

I push him back making him knock into Finn which causes him to start an argument.

The art of diversion.

"Nice dress." I comment when she looks over at me.

"Thanks, it has pockets." Cora replies, giving me a demonstration.

"Thought it was supposed to be the bride who's the prettiest today." I state quietly as no one seems to be listening to us.

"Aw, you're too kind." She smiles before pecking my cheek and guiding us towards the church.

***

An around of applause and cheers resonate in the tall church as Arthur and Linda kiss, I can't help but smile at the happy couple.

"How long?" Tommy jokes when he mumbles into my ear.

"Stop!" I laugh, continuing to clap.

"We're married!" Arthur announces as he and Linda turn to face everyone with grins.

Another round of applause goes around the room, mixed with whistles, hoots, and cheers. Arthur and Linda walk down the aisle as a newly wedded couple before everyone slowly begins to follow them for photos outside.

"I can't imagine you getting married." Tommy states when we stand up.

"I'm hurt, Thomas." I reply, shuffling out of the pew.

"You seem too... independent and strong." Tommy digs himself a bigger hole.

"What? So the point of marriage is supposed to break me?" I question with a chuckle.

"No, just the traditional way is that you'd stay at home, looking after the children, cooking or baking, and waiting for your husband to come home." He answers. "And that's not you... but I like that about you."

"I'm never stopping for some man, men don't deserve rights." I shake my head.

"Oh right." Tommy laughs, slinging his arm around my shoulders as we walk down the aisle. "I guess you work with a lot of males so you can say that."

"Thank you, for letting me, a woman, know what I can say and what I'm allowed to say, thank you husband." I joke and he bumps his hip against mine in response.

"The nagging wife part though, you've got that down." Tommy replies, weaving us through people as I lace our hands together with the hand that was dangling in front of my chest from where his arm is draped over my shoulders.

"Fuck off." I laugh, the fresh spring air hitting my face as we enter the outside, gathering at the back of the large group of people posing for photos.

"You love it." He grins before pressing a kiss to my cheek as I laugh.

A flash blinds me momentary, and I inwardly groan.

A few more photos, Tommy and I trying to annoy each other, and laughs later and we head off to the party.

***

"I've known Arthur since I was like 15, it feels weird to watch him get married after all this time." I tell a stranger that I've been talking to for the past 10 minutes.

"I've grown up with Linda, I've not heard the end of this wedding since she was 10." Linda's cousin makes a joke which I fake laugh at, before taking a sip from my flute of champagne. "Are you getting married anytime soon?"

"Oh, no, god no." I shake my head, chuckling.

"Really? Aren't you with Arthur's brother, what's his name? Thomas is it?" She questions.

"Tommy? We're not really together, well we aren't... Thomas is amazing but..."

"But?" She smiles warmly as if she's just done something.

Why aren't we together is the better question, Tommy is everything I've ever wanted, he respects me, makes me feel like I'm more special that I am, is always there for me no matter what, and can make me feel so carefree, I'm in love with him but he's just not.

"But he isn't one for relationships." I answer. "I'm gonna go annoy some of your family, you make me think when I'm here to get drunk. I don't like that."

Her smile falls and I float off towards a group of strangers, ready to judge.

"I heard that the Shelbys shot someone who accidentally bumped into them once." A middle aged man says quietly.

Perfect, this is the group I want to annoy.

"Really? I heard that they give their children guns." A little younger woman matches his tone.

"That's nothing, I heard that they stab children who beg." I cut in, doing this big exaggerated look around the circle.

"I heard that they hurt people who gossip." Polly comes out of no where, and I can't help but smirk at her when she meets my eyes.

"Are you two Shelbys?" A snooty woman questions with a sigh before sipping her drink.

"No." I answer, which isn't a lie.

"I'm Arthur's aunt and she's his brother's girlfriend." Polly states and I glare at her, before tucking my hair behind my ear and subtly flipping her off, which she suppresses a smirk at.

"Oh, I see. You seem like lovely people." Another woman replies with a tight lipped smile.

"We are." I nod.

"If you stay on the right side of us." Polly adds, lighting a cigarette.

"But if you don't, we'll drag you through hell."

"Simple really." Polly shrugs lightly.

"Of course... we're family now, nothing but love." The same woman replies with a nervous laugh.

As Polly makes them more uncomfortable I look over my shoulder at Tommy across the room, who's sitting at a large table with a few people but I don't think he's interacting with anyone really, cigarette and liquor in hand. He gives me a wink which makes me smile, and he gestures for me to come over with a nod of his head.

Leaving the group and Polly, I cross the room all the way to my best friend who takes a drag from his cigarette as I stand behind him and wrap my arms around his shoulders, letting my hands dangle above his chest life a necklace.

"Are you done antagonising Linda's family?" Tommy questions with a tiny chuckle.

"Not yet. They're so judgy." I reply, accepting Tommy cigarette when he offers it to me.

"Where do you think Linda gets it from?" He rhetorically asks.

"You look very pretty." I inform, pressing a quick kiss to his forehead when he looks up at me.

"If I look pretty you must be the prettiest person in the world." Tommy says, fiddling with my hands.

"Always a charmer you Shelbys." I tease.

"Eh we know how to talk the talk." He jokes, squeezing my hand. "Do you wanna dance?"

I look out at the dance floor where all the couples seem to be, it's a little bit crowded but seems comfortable.

"Sure." I nod and Tommy stands up before offering his hand with a boyish smile.

I match his smile and take his hand, Tommy leads us to the dance floor where I place my hand on his shoulder, keeping the other comfortably in his hand, whilst Tommy places his hand on my lower back. The song is quite a fast paced one, so there's no room for a slow dance.

Tommy and I expertly shuffle through the dance floor, him twirling me out every now and then, as we talk and laugh. "Why are old ladies so judgy?"

"I don't know, their better days are behind them and they can't get over that." Tommy offers an amused suggestion.

"I think it's because they---" I cut myself off with a squeal when Tommy surprises me by twirling me out into the dance floor making me laugh. "Give me a warning next time!"

He just smiles down at me as he looks into my eyes. "No, I like making you laugh."

"You always make me laugh, especially with your questionable choices." I tease, squeezing his hand. "I mean what were you thinking letting Finn---"

"I'm not going into this again, he wanted to do it and who am I to say no?" Tommy replies with a light laugh. "That would make both of us a hypocrite."

"We were more mature at the time..."

"Oh really? That's what you call maturity?" Tommy questions amused, as we swiftly move through the crowd as the song begins to end.

"We may have broken a few things but there's no harm done." I state, letting Tommy spin me one last time before a slower song comes on and we match our dancing to the rhythm.

"Sure, no harm done." He mocks me with a laugh, which makes me laugh.

Thomas sways us through the bunches of people as we lapse into a comfortable silence, settling into our own worlds.

"I think I'm falling in love with you, Cora." Tommy tells me, continuing to sway us as he looks deep into my eyes and it feels like he's looking into my soul.

All I can do is smile.

"Yeah? You think?" I chuckle and he matches my smile.

"Mm." He hums, with a nod.

"That's alright, because I think I'm falling in love with you, too." I reply, causing him to break out into the biggest smile.

We pause our moving, standing still amongst all the other couples dancing. Tommy cups my face with his hands and goes to kiss me. "What about your family?" I question, when were mere inches away.

He smiles. "Fuck 'em, they all practically know anyway."

I reply by closing the gap between us, kissing my best friend in the middle of the dance floor as couples dance around us whilst we're stood still, in the midst of his brother's wedding. Tommy's thumb brushes my cheekbone gently as we stand in our own bubble, oblivious to what's going on around us, smiling into our kiss.

"I love you, Cora Witton." Tommy utters, pressing his forehead against mine with a smile.

"I love you, Tommy Shelby." I utter back, kissing him again which makes my toes curl.

"What do you say we finish this dance, get a little drunk, and then go home?" Tommy suggests, tucking some hair behind my ear. "If you can handle Linda's stare that long that is because from where I'm looking, she doesn't look that happy that we stole the spotlight from her on her wedding day." Tommy chuckles, looking over my shoulder at his family.

I look over at them too, seeing how they look shocked yet look like they expected it, and I meet Linda's glare, happy at how I've pissed her off.

"You're such an attention whore." I joke, looking back at Tommy.

"You know it." He smirks and begins to sway us again.

It feels like everything I've ever worked for in my life has led up to this moment. This is what I get after years of struggling, and fuck is it worth it.

"I want this song to play at our wedding."

"Oh, we're getting married now are we?" I chuckle fondly, liking the sound of that.

"If all goes to plan, yeah."

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malereader-inserts · 3 years

Text

Achieving the Impossible

Fandom: The Vampire Diaries/The Originals Pairing: Mikaelsons & Brother!Reader Summary: With the Mikaelsons, anything is possible Word Count: 1,355 Request: So I just started watching The Originals and I got attached to Elijah, Klaus and Rebekah immdediately .So please grant my wish for a Klaus Mikaelson x Younger bro reader where r is really close to Elijah but scared of Klaus and Klaus can't hold the brotherly jealousy anymore so he confronted R about him being scared but R just keeps denying resulting to him pointing a dagger at R's chest due to his anger and then R was saved by Elijah but r got scared of all of his sibling and Klaus being soft.

Klaus knew he was part of the family.

No matter how much Finn disliked his nature or how Klaus has daggered his siblings on countless occasions, but, he knew that no matter what his family always had his back. Even if they didn’t see eye to eye. But, Klaus was able to either get along with the majority of his siblings - except one.

“Leave him be.”

“Elijah,” Klaus snaps at his elder, “I’ve left him be for a thousand years - I demand answers.”

“You’re not entitled to answers,” Elijah bit back at him, adjusting his cuffs of his shirt, “He just doesn’t like you, you have to accept that.”

“For a thousand years?” Klaus scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest, Elijah could almost see a pout on his brother’s face, “Easy for you to say, you’re the favoured one.”

Elijah rolls his eyes, though he doesn’t comments. He knows that you favoured him, there is a significant age gap between you and him. You are after all the youngest after Henrik had died, but growing up, it was Elijah who really raised you. He taught you how to hunt and fight, ready for when your father comes back to teach you.

Mikael has always been proud of you, you were quick on your learning, never complained about how he taught you and was quick to adapt to your brothers’ teaching.

There was a part of Klaus that envied you when you were human, because, you had your dad’s attention and love. Mikael actually had cared for you, but Klaus had none from him.

“Is he sulking again?” Rebekah had asked, looking at Klaus, rolling her eyes, “You know instead of demanding and frightening the poor boy - you could try asking.”

Elijah chuckles, “Please, it’s not in Niklaus’ nature just to politely ask.”

“I can-!”

You entered the room, you stopped at the door way, glancing at the direction of each siblings, they looked at you in silence. You weren’t going to question why Niklaus had his arms in the air.

“I think I’m just going to leave.”

You leave the room, confused as you went to pester someone else. Five minutes had passed before Klaus looked at Elijah.

“You have to stop treating him like a child! He’s a thousand years old,” Klaus argued, once again huffing and crossing his arms over his chest, “I have a right to know why he hates me.”

“And he has a right to withheld the answer from you, Nik,” Elijah commented, standing up straight, “Please respect our brother’s wishes.”

Klaus was not going to do that.

Klaus had some errands to do, picking up a few things before marching around the house, hoping to miss Elijah and knowing the elder, stopping Klaus from getting answers.

He was tired. He had found you in the library, whilst you didn’t show that you were outright afraid of your own brother, Klaus had that gut feeling.

“Hi, Nik.”

Klaus stops in his tracks, almost forgetting what he was doing and why he was going to do it. You close your book as you stare at your older brother, you tilted your head to the side - he just stared at you.

Times like these, he forgets that you never favour him as a brother. Just because you look at him so sweet like that there is no fault to you. You stand up from the sofa as you placed the book down on the side table, snapping the hybrid back to reality.

“Oh, good, you’re responsive,” You say, there’s a soft smile upon your face, “What can I do for you?”

Right, what was he here for? Oh, that’s right.

“I had a question, one that only you could answer.”

Your blood ran cold, you gulp down the nervousness, you knew that the day would come when Klaus would finally snap. You give him a sheepish smile, hoping to calm down your erratic heartbeat.

“Oh, well I hope to enlighten you!”

Klaus looks at you with cold calculating eyes, pausing before opening his mouth to ask you the question, “So, dearest brother of mine, why do you fear me? It has to be a reason, right?”

You tried to play it off, trying to make it less obvious that every step that Klaus takes towards you, you would shuffle back, you tighten your lips, “I don’t know, Nik, I don’t have a clue what you’re on about.”

Apparently, that wasn’t the best way to get around it. It seems like your brother was more ticked off than ever as he slams you against the wall. Sure, you were a vampire, and it shouldn’t have hurt, but Klaus had that slight advantage of strength.

A hard pressure from his hand leaned against your shoulder, pinning you down where he wanted you to be. You felt something pointy against your chest, you try to make sure your mask doesn’t tip in any direction to show that you feared your brother.

“Don’t lie to me,” Klaus snarls at you, he could see you gulp as you looked at him with wide eyes.

“That’s enough, Niklaus!”

Klaus’ pressure wore off as he turned to see Elijah standing behind him, Elijah looked at his younger brothers with such a threat that even you could whimper out loud. You relaxed your shoulders as you look between your brothers.

“(Y/n), get out of here,” Elijah firmly commanded you.

You nodded as Klaus lets out a manic chuckle, you stop in between the two of them, casting a look towards Niklaus before using your vampire speed to leave the room, possibly leaving the area for a bit.

“I told you, Niklaus.”

Klaus had been riled up that he was willing to fight Elijah, typical of him, but the look that you cast towards him made him reconsider. He knows that look, it was the same look he would give your own father. The fear mixed with sadness in your eyes.

“Leave me be, Elijah,” Klaus says, placing the blade down next to the book that you had left.

“I’m not letting you chase after him.”

“Elijah, I said leave me be.”

Klaus had found you somehow, it almost took him half the week to actually spot you and get you alone so it was just you and him.

You stopped in your place when you see him approach you as Klaus held his hands up.

“I don’t have anything in my hands,” Klaus tries to reassure you, he sees how your shoulders fall into relaxation, “I want to apologise to you about...that.”

You chuckle, nervous but bitter, “The great bad wolf apologising, it seems like the world is falling apart.”

Even Klaus got a chuckle out of that, keeping his distance with you, “I just want to know why you hate me.”

You paused as you tilted your head at him, “I don’t hate you, I fear you but not hate you. Those are two different things, Nik, at the end of the day you’re my brother - no matter how much you terrify me, I would always go to the end of the line for you.”

“I hear a but...”

You sighed, “But, Nik, I’m not like Elijah or Bekah or Kol for the matter, I spent years trying the keep up with your mood swings and your erratic behaviour, but there was no loop hoop for your reasoning for daggering our siblings - therefore it was easy to be cautious than to risk it.”

Klaus stares at you, you looked at him hopelessly, your hands in your pockets as you shrugged your shoulders.

“You’re still my brother, and I hope we’re able to form a bond, but it seems like it’s impossible now.”

Klaus shakes his head, he stares firmly, “No, we’re the impossible, (Y/n) and if we are the impossible then everything else is possible - one way or another.”

“But-”

“No, we’re family and family is going to be there, always and forever. We made that pack, no matter what.”

You smiled softly at him, sighing, “You really think we could achieve the impossible?”

“It’s possible.”

#klaus mikaelson #klaus mikaelson imagine #klaus mikaelson x male!reader #elijah mikaelson #elijah mikaelson imagine #elijah mikaelson x male!reader #mikaelson x male!reader #x male reader #platonic

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supraveng · 3 years

Text

Marvelous Friends part 1

Summary: You join your best friend at a party, and meet the man of your dreams?

Characters: Reader, Benedict Cumberbatch x Sophie Hunter, RDJ x Susan Downey, Sebastian Stan, Chris Evans

Warnings: cursing, reader in over her head, bad writing...

“Oh, for fuck’s sake Aaron, you are supposed to be preventing these things, not causing them“ you scream into your cell phone so agitated by this whole thing that you aren’t even aware that there are people watching you from the window.

You stepped outside trying to not cause a scene or god forbid have Sophie’s kids hear you and repeat anything you might say. You finally hang up and throw your phone across the lawn as Benedict comes out the door to check on you.

“Everything ok dear?” he approaches you with a smirk knowing full well that you are irritated beyond rational conversation. “Can I get you anything?” he asks. Turning to face him now that you’ve taken a few deep breaths,

“I think I need a new manager, got any good ones lying around?” you reply.

“Holy Shit! That was your manager! I just thought your husband was in the doghouse! Hi, I’m Robert” he sticks out his hand and you shake it, thankfully you are still too riled up to get star struck and make a fool of yourself.

“Hi, sorry, I didn’t intend to be that loud, but that man is an absolute jackass! I’m Y/N” you respond as you blow out some air and try to calm down.

“Y/N darling, you need a drink, let me make you a martini”

“No, Benny, I’m your babysitter tonight and you know one martini turns into 5” you smirk as you follow the two of them back into the house.

Sophie is coming down the stairs and her smile disappears when she sees your red face and Benedict heading toward the kitchen. “Y/N, what happened? Are you ok?” she asks, her voice thick with worry.

“Oh Phie, I’m fine, Aaron is just trying my patience and I couldn’t stay quiet” you smile as she wraps you in a hug, then busts out laughing.

“Well, that’s a long time coming, I’m not sure how you have worked with him this long without bloodshed” she quips as Benedict hands you a cup of tea.

“I’m not that bad to work with, I just don’t like my personal life to be used without my permission. Ugh, I just don’t have the energy for him today, I wanted to come and have fun with Kit, Hal & Finn” you whine as you sip your tea “but apparently the drama pays off because this is the best cup of tea Benny has ever made for me, thank you” you reach up and peck his cheek “I’m feeling better already.”

“Good, because the boys have a list of fun for you tonight and they are extremely excited.” Sophie responds “Oh, and this is Susan, Robert’s wife”

“It’s nice to meet you, now you all go on and have a lovely dinner and don’t worry about us” you smile to the couples as you head upstairs to check on the kids.

Three hours later the two couples walk back into the house to find you frantically typing on your laptop at the breakfast bar in the kitchen, with a cold cup of tea next to you. You jump when you hear someone clear their throat, not realizing they had come in and were all staring at you.

“What? Why are you all staring at me?” you ask.

Sophie shakes her head and giggles at you “we asked if you wanted to join us for a drink, apparently you are very focused on your work and didn’t even hear us come in.”

“Sorry, I was planning my wedding” you reply with a smirk “Kit proposed again, actually, I’m not sure this was a proposal, it was more or less a list of reasons why my previous decline is not being accepted. Apparently, age is just a number and I can move to England right away, so the wedding is next week” you explain as you follow the others over to the bar.

Benedict turned around with a guilty look on his face, “what did you do?” his wife asks with a pointed glare. “I was reassuring our son that if he liked someone and made his intentions known then any girl would be lucky to have him, but in my defense, I thought he was talking about that little girl down the street, Madison. They were playing yesterday and he seemed smitten, so when he mentioned his love living in the US and not in England…..I was trying to help” he huffed out as he started pouring the drinks.

You all start laughing and realize that since it’s Benedict’s fault, he will have to break it to Kit that you will not be marrying him next week. “Why do I have to be the bad guy here? It was an accident!” Ben protests “and why didn’t you just tell him you have a boyfriend already and can’t marry him?”

“Because I would never lie to Kit” you respond, sipping your martini. “I haven't really met anyone since I moved back from Vancouver, a few dates here or there but no one to write home about" you say with a shrug “Well, in that case, can I give you away at the wedding?” Robert asks and thankfully lightens the mood. It was another two hours of drinking and laughing with your oldest and newest friends before you all decide to call it a night.

“Y/N, Robert and I are having friends over to our place on Sunday, we would love for you to be there” Susan states as they are heading toward the door. “That’s so sweet, thank you, I’ll just tag along as an extra Cumberbatch” you tell her as you hug her goodbye.

You wake the next morning and know that you have a ton of work to do and 0 motivation. Deciding to distract yourself as best you can, you text Sophie about the party at Susan & Robert’s.

So what kind of party is this thing tomorrow?

Phie: They usually have 30 or so people, tons of food, drinks, but very laid back. I think you will like it

That’s reassuring, the last thing I need is to make a fool out of myself in front of Ben’s celebrity friends

Phie: Oh, there will definitely be celebs there, but honestly I have no idea who, most likely a bunch of the Marvel crew, those who are in town anyway….but don’t stress, they are all mostly normal people, lol

Well, I’m going to work on some writing and then maybe try to find something nice to wear to the party, I might make a fool of myself, but I need to look like I have my act together

Phie: Send me pics, I’ll help you decide….btw Ben has been questioning me on your dating habits, I have a funny feeling that he might try to set you up...

Well, that sounds dreadful, I love your husband but what is his track record for match making?

Phie: I don't think he's actually ever tried to set anyone up before

Fantastic, I'm the guinea pig 🙄

Ok, what do you think of these, I don’t want to be overdressed or look like I’m homeless

Phie: I love them both, but how about you were the short one & I borrow the blue one?

That is a great idea! I’ll be there a bit early so we can get ready together. Who is staying home with the boys?

Phie: Actually, day time parties with the Downey’s usually includes the kids, so they will be joining us

Time for the party came earlier than you had anticipated as you pulled up to Phie’s house, Kit came running out the door with a big smile on his face. Crouching down you scooped him into a hug and kissed his cheek.

“Well aren’t you in a good mood today, handsome?” asking as you set him back down. He grabbed your hand and began dragging you back to the house.

“Mum told me we can’t get married next week, but I can still love you for the rest of my life, isn’t that great!” he exclaimed as you walked in the front door.

“That is the best thing I’ve heard all week! And I get to love you for the rest of my life too” you reply watching the realization hit him and his smile get even bigger and run off to tell everyone the good news. Before you could do anything, you went back out to your car and grabbed your bags and then headed up to Phie’s bedroom to get ready.

“There you are, I was beginning to worry” she said as she pecked your cheek and gave you a hug, then handed you a glass.

“Did you start day drinking without me?” you inquire as you sip on the merlot with a smile on your face.

“I just opened the bottle for us to enjoy while we get ready. I spoke with Kit and the wedding is off but he understands and all is well. Benedict tried and, just made everything messier” she responded while pulling the blue dress from the garment bag.

“You did a fantastic job, he gave me the biggest hug and seems very happy that we will not be getting married” you giggle as you move around her room figuring out the best place to put your things.

“I think he’ll be more upset about you taking off next week than anything, that’s why I’m not planning on telling him until after you’ve gone. He has grown really attached to you” she smirks as she’s slipping the dress on.

Before you realize it, the wine bottle is empty and Ben is knocking on the door.

“You two look amazing as always, but the car is here, so we need to head out. Can you bring Kit down with you while I go down and get Hal & Finn seated in the car?” he asks as Kit comes in and gasps looking up at his mom.

“Mum, you look like a princess” he hugs her legs and looks up at her lovingly.

“Thank you love, you look very handsome. Are you ready to go? Do you have your bag?” she asks while rubbing his back.

“Oh, I need to get that, and can I give Y/N her present now?” You look over a bit confused

“oh Kit, you didn’t have to get me a gift” you tell him as he gives you a hug.

“But it’s important to show the people you love how special they are, I’ll be right back” he states as he heads back downstairs. You look at Sophie confused and she just smirks at you as both follow him down to the kitchen. He holds up a cupcake with a huge grin on his face.

“This is for you, because you are as sweet as a cupcake. And that’s a ring you can wear to remind you that you are wonderful when I’m not here to tell you.”

You feel like you are about to cry, it was by far the most sincere and thoughtful thing you have ever heard. “Thank you! I love it & I love you!” you told him as you kissed his forehead and put the ring on.

“Alright, let’s get going Kit, dad and your brothers are in the car waiting for us!” Sophie grabbed his hand and laced your arm with hers as she ushered you all out the door.

Stepping out of the car at the Downey’s house you started walking towards the door when Kit came up and grabbed your hand.

“Can I be your date tonight?” he asked with a shy grin.

“Absolutely! There’s no one else I would want to accompany me tonight.”

Ben turns to you, holding Hal & Finn “remember Kit, the kids are going to be playing upstairs, but you can join us when you get hungry, alright?”

“Yes, dad, but Y/N is still my girl” he stated proudly as you walked through the door.

“That’s right Ben, I’m Kit’s girl!” you lean down and kiss the top of his head just before he heads up the stairs with his dad. Sophie grabbed your arm and the two of you headed further into the house.

Robert spotted you almost immediately and came over hugging you both “where is the fiance? Are all the details in place for the ceremony? I’m still walking you down the aisle right?”

“Hi Robert, I’m sorry but the ceremony has been cancelled. Sophie was able to talk some sense into Kit since Benny was useless” you reply.

“I heard that!” Ben remarks as he’s coming into the room. “And in my defense, I’m not useless, just not very good at telling my son no.”

“It’s alright dahling, you tried your best.” Sophie tried to console Benedict who seemed to take your statement to heart.

“Well, I’m glad you made it, can I get you a drink?” Susan asked as an attempt to move on to a more neutral conversation.

“Yes, please” you replied happily as you followed her to the bar.

“Y/N? Y/N L/N? Holy Shit!” You heard from the doorway to the next room, where most of the party goers had already gathered. You turned and was shocked

“Seb? Holy Shit! How are you?” you asked as you moved over to hug him. “It’s been so long, I’m surprised you recognized me.”

“I’m good” he responded “and yea, it’s been like...10 years? And you look great, haven’t aged a bit!”

You laughed at his response “that is an absolute lie, but I will take the compliment anyway.” you giggle at him. He was always such a nice guy to work with and genuinely considerate to everyone on set. His charming personality always made you smile.

“This is so great running into you, I saw your interview on Good Day LA last week. You are doing so great!” he said with a huge smile.

“Oh thanks, but I think that may have been the worst interview in the history of television. I was honestly hoping no one saw it” you cringed rethinking how quickly the questions had gone off the rails. You are a writer, becoming more well known over the past decade so interviews were becoming more common for you, but that one felt more like a Twilight Zone episode.

“Well, it was a bit crazy, but you handled a lot better than most people would. I was impressed” he grinned as he took a sip of his beer.

“Thanks, I appreciate that, and my whole deer in headlights reaction.” you commented as you took the drink Susan offered.

“Hey, I didn’t know you knew each other?” you heard Robert say as he came up from behind you “and what happened in the interview?”

“Yea, I was writing for Gossip Girl, back when Seb was on and he was constantly teasing me for being cold” you reminded him with a smirk.

“New York in fall is beautiful, not cold! You are crazy!” he responds as he starts laughing at me.

“And the interview was a shit show that I barely made it out alive” you state with a roll of your eyes.

“That’s not true, you put that woman in her place and didn’t seem fazed by her ridiculous questions at all” he told me.

“What the hell happened?” Robert seemed more interested than I thought he would

“we were talking about my new book and the book tour coming up, then all of a sudden she’s asking me about my ex” I responded as I shrugged my shoulders. Sebastian looked at me “then, the woman asks if she’s seeing anyone now, and your response was priceless, I might steal it if you don’t mind” he states as he’s laughing remembering the interview.

“Y/N, dear, what did you say?” Robert asks with a smirk.

“I asked her ‘why? Are you shooting your shot?” as you start laughing too, realizing that you probably couldn’t have planned it if you tried. At this point you realize there are more of the Marvel friends standing around listening to your conversation and you don’t even care.

Your first drink is kicking in and it’s not like you are ever going to see these people again. “Honestly, I don’t know why she even mentioned my ex, nobody cares who I’m dating, I’m a writer”

“Yes, but when us writers date high profile celebrities, people want to know” Sophie reminds you as she puts her arm around you.

“Oh Phie, high profile is a bit of a stretch doncha think? But you are always my voice of reason, this is why I love you!” you say as you kiss her cheek. Looking around the room you wonder if there’s anyone else here you know, when you see Chris Evans on the other side of the room.

Benedict immediately follows your line of sight and smirks before taking your empty glass. “I think you need a refill, here allow me, why don't you and Sophie go find a place to chat.”

His wife shakes her head and gives you a small sympathetic smile before sending him back for refills. Sophie drags you further into the room and finds a spot to sit that gives you a better view of Mr. Evans.

“I didn’t realize you knew Sebastian” she said as she sat.

“Yea, we worked together when I was living in NY, that was 10 or 12 years ago. I didn’t know you knew him” you respond. She looks at you questioningly, then shakes her head.

“All the Marvel people know each other, you still haven’t watched the movies, have you?”

“Um, I haven’t seen all of them, there are a lot, but I did watch Doctor Weirdo, and Benny was very good!” you respond quite proud of yourself.

“Bloody hell! It’s Doctor Strange, we’ve had this discussion before” Ben states as he hands you your fresh drink.

“Ok, I’m sorry. Doctor Strange, although I don’t think that’s much better than Doctor Weirdo. And in my defense, your facial hair in the movie gave me nightmares'' you say as you sip on your drink.

“Anyway, did the ex contact you after the interview? I’m just curious?” Ben asks, rolling his eyes at you.

You scrunch up your nose at the question “no, why would he? I haven’t spoken to him in the last four years. And honestly I'm sure he deleted my number. Can we talk about anyone else?"

"Yes, what's the schedule on the book tour? How long will you be gone?" Sophie acts trying to defuse the irritation in your voice with the mention of your ex.

You can tell by the way she's glancing at her husband that she's trying to figure out why he brought up your ex knowing full well that if he had contacted you, she would have been the first one to know about it..

"Oh I'm flying out next Sunday, heading for NYC, then I'll be in Boston for 2 days, then a day In Philly, a day in Baltimore and I'm not 100% of the cities after that, other than ending up the following week in Miami so I can be with the family for spring break" you mention to them.

"Did I hear you say you are only going to Boston for 2 days, that's not nearly long enough" you hear a deep voice state as you look up and see Chris Evan's standing next to Seb and walking closer to you.

Holding out his hand "I'm Chris, I don't think we've met" he states.

You plaster the most sincere smile you can on your face in hopes of not drooling at the sight of him, shaking his hand "I'm Y/N, and yes, this tour is only 2 days in Boston, but I lived there for 5 years so I’ve seen quite a bit already” you respond.

“Huh? For someone who’s cold all the time, you seem to wind up in colder climates” Seb laughs at you. “Shut up! You are the worst!” you respond with a laugh.

“It’s true though, darling. And you always call me to complain about it!” Sophie responds with a smirk.

“OK, in my defense, Boston was a needed escape from my family, whom I love dearly but can be quite suffocating at times. Then Chicago was my first real job after graduation and I couldn’t pass that up! And as my best friend, Phie, you are required to listen to all my complaining, regardless of the topic” you state matter of factly.

“And last year in Vancouver, that was the worst yet, she would send me photos of eyelashes with ice crystals on them” Sophie laughs remembering your first winter in Canada and how miserable you were.

“That was awful and you and Benny both ridiculed me, I’m still emotionally scared”

“So, you don’t like the cold but keep torturing yourself?” Chris asks with a smirk.

“It appears I do, but it’s always for good reason. Chicago was an opportunity I couldn’t resist, if I had taken that job, I probably wouldn't have published my first novel” you explain with fondness.

“That’s not true, Y/N. Your first novel was incredible and it would have been published eventually” Ben states as he takes your empty glass.

“Benedict has read my book?” you asked Sophie completely shocked.

“He has read all of your novels, but I think the first 3 was trying to find juicy gossip on how we met or something to try and blackmail you later, I’m not quite sure” she responds with a shrug.

“Hold on” Seb interjects “your book, Searching for more, is about Sophie?”

“Yes, and no” you respond “the adventure that Annabell has is loosely based on my summer after high school before moving to Boston. And her new found friend, Fiona, is Sophie to a T! And I’m also shocked that you’ve read it” you eyed him suspiciously.

“Ok, so you really married a French man when you were 18 and brought him back with you?” Seb asks, completely disregarding that you questioned him about reading the book. How did your day turn out like this? This was the most surreal moment you have had in a long time.

“No, he wasn’t French, he was Belgian!” Benedict responds as he comes back in with refills. You start laughing when you see the way Chris and Seb are staring at you wide eyed.

“Oh my gosh! No, I didn’t get married when I was 18. And Benny, you weren't there, you don’t know anything” shaking your head. “Annabelle’s story is loosely based on events that occurred, we didn’t get married…..and he was Swiss, I think.” you snicker when you look over at Sophie for confirmation, she shrugs and takes a drink.

The five of you continue to chat for another hour or so when you feel a tap on your shoulder. You turn to see Kit smiling at you with a cup in his hand “I missed you” he states as he climbs up into your lap and hugs you around your neck.

“I missed you too little man, do anything fun while you were upstairs?” you asked as he made himself more comfortable.

“I didn’t know you had a kid” Seb says as you are trying to balance the 5 year old in your lap with your drink in your hand.

Kit looks up at him “she’s not my mum, she’s my girl! That’s my mum” he states as he points to Sophie.

“Oh, well, it’s nice to meet you, I’m Seb, this is my friend Chris. What’s your name?” he asks while Kit plops himself in the middle of the group as though he should have been there all along.

“I’m Kit” he states as he extends his hand to both Chris and Sebastian.

“So, she’s your girl, huh?” Chris asks with a smirk “is it serious?”

“Very! He gave me a ring today, see.” showing Chris your right hand and the Wonder Woman ring.

“Wait a minute, the wedding is cancelled, but you still gave her a ring? I’m not sure that’s how it works buddy” Robert kneels down talking to Kit.

“it’s ok, I get to love her forever and we can get married when I’m 30!” Kit explains as he rushes off to join the other kids.

You all turn and look at Sophie “I thought you fixed it Phie! You’ve just given him a deadline!" you gasp.

She smiles at you with a guilty look on her face "I think you might need to grab a bite to eat before you have another drink. And honestly, I'm sure he will forget all about this in a few months. Besides, I won't let my 30 year old son marry some 60 something year old hag that's after him for his money!" she states as seriously as possible.

You deadpan "thanks for that. I need a new best friend" you roll your eyes and head towards the food.

"Well, I didn't see that coming" Robert chuckles as he watches the two of you walk out of the room.

"That actually went better than I expected" Ben responds and shakes his head, "those two are worse than siblings."

A/N: I had an idea of who the ex is, but I may just leave it open for interpretation, he does come into the story later, but can remain faceless

#marvel au #avengers au #marvel cast rpf #sebastian stan x reader #chris evans x reader #rdj x reader #benedict cumberbatch #sebastian stan #chris evans fan fiction #robert downey jr #benedict cumberbatch x reader

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twinklelilstarkey · 3 years

Text

Stopping You [Part 10] - Michael Gray

Words: 8.9k+

Summary: Y/N’s recovery from both her feelings and her wound takes a step back after a specific night.

Warnings: Female!Reader. Mentions of wounds, a lot of blood, death and night terrors. Emotional cheating. Self-hate (discrediting their own sadness and feelings; hateful inner voice).

Prologue Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11

It has been a total of 24 hours.

Yesterday was a bad day. Both mentally and physically.

Polly tried her best into bringing your mood up, which worked in some way. She eased your mind by telling you that what you were feeling is completely normal, but as soon as you were alone, it was like the whole world was crashing on you.

Over crying so much as hateful questions filled your mind, you were sore at the end of the night. You contracted your muscles so much while sobbing that you could feel your wound pulsate against your skin in pain.

You questioned almost everything about your life before and after Michael left and when he reappeared. Things have changed, not just around his family, but also around you. And that seems to be one of the most confusing matters.

You never cared too much about this, but you can’t help but think about how so many things have changed since Michael came back. From your behaviors to how you function. Everything has changed in some way.

You’ve always suffered with night terrors in your life, ever since your parents left, but they were almost never about Michael. The exception being when the whole Italian/New York mafia situation went down, and Michael got injured. But other than that, it was always you, or anybody else close, that would die.

Never Michael.

You want to know what could’ve possibly awaken those thoughts and that part of your brain that makes you think like that. Could it be because you now connect him to something bad in your life? Or that when he came back, he had-

No, you’re not going there. It’s useless. It will cost you nothing pain, and it won’t grant you any answers. Might as well push that away and live your life.

Or at least try.

You bring your hot mug back to your lips and take another sip of your tea, letting your eyes fall to the ground.

Polly believes you could talk to him. Tell him about how you’ve been feeling lately. But, honestly, for what? To say that you’re falling right back in love with him just to later be thrown in the face that he does not love or feel anything for you anymore.

He. Is. Getting. Married.

It would just be simply ridiculous to do such a thing.

He doesn’t feel anything for you and that’s okay. All he feels is pity and maybe he got a little scared over you being shot, but that’s it. There are no feelings attached, no romance. No nothing. Just simply… a connection through pain, which awoke lost and forbidden memories.

Maybe this could just be your pride talking over your heart but, you just can’t believe that you’re letting yourself fall so easily. After so long of crying over him and overworking yourself to become a Peaky Blinder and just- not worry about anything in your demolished love life. All of it going to the trash because… You caught feelings for him again?

It’s disappointing to say the least.

Today, you awoke as soon as the sun made its way into the living room and since then, you haven’t done much. You walked back to your room after getting yourself a warm drink and sat by the window staring at the green grass of the neighbors’ house like it’s the most entertaining thing in the world.

A book is resting beside you. You have read a few good pages, but you can’t bring yourself to read more than 20 at a time.

Your mind is too heavy.

Voices coming from downstairs make you look away from the window and up to your door. You try your best to identify them as soon as you find them familiar.

You can hear voices and the laugher of Lizzie and Arthur. Which is awfully strange.

You scowl at the sound, and the soft patter of quick feet running around the house squeezes your heart. The kids are here too.

You rise from your seat and walk across your bedroom to the door. You open it softly and the sound of everyone’s voices is now louder. Confusion is the most prominent emotion you can feel right now, but you can’t help but welcome it better than any other one you’ve been feeling lately.

While walking down the main stairs silently, a soft gasp is heard over the loud voices. Ruby’s.

You smile at her as she spots you walking down the stairs and she quickly let’s go of her mother’s hand to run towards you.

As you’re distracted swallowing down the jab of pain at your middle while leaning down to grab her, Polly’s eyes meet you. The smile in your face is almost like a warm hug in the winter. She could get used to this sight forever.

“Look who came back from war,” Ada jokes as she spots you.

She walks towards you and her arms wrap around you as soon as you’re close enough. You lean towards her, even with Ruby on your hip, and she squeezes you in closer.

“I was so worried,” She tells you, “I’m so glad you’re okay.”

You pull away from the hug with a small smile and she gives you a wide one in return. It’s been a few weeks since you last saw her. She had left back for London not long before the whole event happened. You honestly didn’t expect to see her this soon.

As Ada moves back, everyone’s attention goes over to you. Everyone, or at least, almost everyone pulls you into a hug, sharing their words of how grateful they are from knowing that you’re still breathing.

You know they had visited you back at the hospital when you were still asleep, but nothing compares to actually seeing you move like nothing had happened. Arthur’s words, not yours.

Talking about Arthur. He was awfully apologetic while you two hugged it out. You believe he must have blamed himself for what happened, but you were quick to take that idea off his head.

You’re not about to see anybody else beating themselves for something out of their reach. Unless that’s you, of course.

Tommy and Arthur, not even 20 minutes into stepping in Polly’s home, excuse themselves and leave off to work.

The crowd in the living room doesn’t consist in much more people. Both Ada and Lizzie, and of course the kids, stayed behind and took a seat on the couch. The kids surrounded you as soon as you all sat down, while the women in front of you were distracted on talking about whatever, or rather, whoever worth of gossiping.

You listen to some of their words while being continuously pulled into conversation by Charlie as you let Ruby sit next to you, leaning to your side.

Karl is sitting closer to his mother, but looking at you and joining the conversations, nonetheless.

“What about you, Y/N?” Ada asks as she sips her tea.

“What about me?” You ask confused, obviously having no clue on what she’s on about.

“We were talking about weddings,” Lizzie explains, “Sharing our opinions on what is the best wedding. And Ada asked if you have anyone in your mind as your future husband?”

Her tone is playful more than anything. Both Lizzie and Ada expect a disgusted scowl or a roll of your eyes as an answer, but Polly can’t help but tense up against her seat at the question.

As innocent as this conversation was, it was more than powerful to push you back into your inner darkness.

“Not that I know of.” You answer, trying to mimic Lizzie’s tone.

“Oh, come on. You don’t find any man attractive?” Ada asks, putting her cup down beside her, “Not even one?”

You shake your head slowly and she stares at you with half closed eyes, almost as if she has a suspicion of some sort about your feelings towards any male presences.

“There has to be someone,” Lizzie agrees with Ada, “It’s been… what? 3 years?”

You shrug, fighting your urge to correct her since it won’t do you any justice, and the two women share a look as Polly watches all the action unfold.

“What about Finn?”

Oh god, you almost gagged right here.

Ada laughs under her breath at your disgusted yet shocked look and shakes her thoughts of that couple even be slightly real, away.

“God.” Polly scoffs out loud, making every woman rip a slight smile.

“What’s so wrong about my baby brother?” Polly asks, hands over her hips, playful grin on her face.

“Nothing is wrong,” Polly explains, “They would just be the most chaotic couple to existence. Can you imagine?”

You chuckle at her words and shake your head.

“They would burn down the church right at their wedding,” Polly jokes making both Lizzie and Ada laugh, “Probably even when saying their vows.”

There’re a few seconds of silence as the women let their giggles die down.

“Where is Finn?” Lizzie asks curious.

“Oh, Tommy has been making the boy work double the shifts now, for some reason.” Polly answers, “I don’t understand why, but they changed a lot of his shifts since their last meeting.”

“There was a meeting?” You ask confused.

Polly looks over at you.

“Yes, there was. It was only between Tommy and some of the men.” She answers with a short nod, “Nothing too important was talked about, I’m sure.”

You nod at her a little bit unsure and Charlie is quick to grab your attention back to him. He pulls you by your sleeve to look at him and he starts showing you his new toy horse, again.

You feel like you’ve seen that horse a thousand times, now.

Another conversation restarts between the women and you lean back on the couch, letting Ruby continue to play with your gold necklaces as Charlie talks his heart out about the horse that his dad gave him.

Your mind is constantly somewhere else. But this time, it focused on work. Mainly, on what the meeting could’ve possibly been about. As if any meeting with just the men was ‘not important’. They always have the most interesting meetings.

And with that train of thought, hours go by.

You were so distracted by listening to the women beside you laugh and talk, or just with looking down at the kids, that you didn’t even notice the time pass.

Your mind is still on that damned meeting, but you don’t let it get the best of you. You’re sure that the information will eventually reach you. In one way or another.

Three knocks are heard from the front door, and only Polly stands to open it. Nobody thinks too much of it. Everyone knew that eventually someone would come and pick up Ada, Lizzie and the kids.

It’s soon to be dark out, they must be almost leaving now.

“I’m sorry that we’re late.” A familiar voice sounds from the door.

Ada freezes and at the same time she looks up at you, you look up at the door. Not even 5 seconds later, Michael enters the house, followed by, of course, Gina. His blue eyes travel to the couch in the living room, and as he finds you, you’re already looking down at Charlie.

Your hand rests against Charlies’ head, smoothing his soft hair between your fingers, detangling it softly.

He forces his gaze to go back to the blonde behind him and his mother closes the front door behind them.

“Go sit. Make yourself comfortable. I’ll go make more tea.” Polly says, voice strong, not as soft as it was previously.

Ada’s and Lizzie’s eyes stay on both Michael and Gina as the couple stands in silence. They don’t find the women’s gaze as nothing more than their way to look at guests before exchanging some welcoming words, so, the tense air and shock just came unnoticed.

“Oh, hi Michael” Ada says, standing on her feet. “Didn’t expect to see you today.”

She gives her cousin a quick hug, in which he hugs back, but her eyes quickly fall on the blonde.

“And who are you?” Ada asks softly.

“Michael’s fiancée, Gina” She says with her American accent, extending her hand towards the other family member she hasn’t heard of before.

Ada shakes her hand, feeling slightly confused and shocked with her words, but, just like anyone else in this room, she’s quick to hide her emotions.

“Please, sit. I don’t want you standing all night.” Polly says to the new guests, from the kitchen door.

Michael is the first one to move towards the couches. You don’t dare to look up at him and he notices, fighting his own urge to start a conversation.

Your heart quickens the closer he gets to you and Charlie looks up at him, probably recognizing his face somewhere.

“Charlie, honey, scoot over a little.” Lizzie tells the boy.

The boy in front of you nods in response and takes his eyes off Michael. He stands on the couch and carefully steps over your lap and sits on your other side, by the arm of the couch.

Michael takes his seat next to you and you hold in your breath as your arms rest completely against one another. Lizzie moves a bit to the side and Gina sits beside her fiancée, who has his attention somewhere else.

“How are you?” Michael whispers down at you and you still don’t look up.

“Good.”

Your tone is cold and distant, which he finds extremely strange and awfully uncomfortable.

The couch is surely not large enough for 4 people, but you and Michael are having it worse than anyone else seated down on it. Lizzie and Gina have at least a few inches between themselves, while you and Michael are almost completely leaning against one another, trapped between Gina and Charlie.

Michael’s hands rest over his lap as he hears the awfully awkward conversation between the women start, not finding it at all surprising that you are paying them no absolute attention.

Ruby lets go of your necklaces for the first time and looks down at your hands.

They’re slightly sweaty over the presence of the man beside you but she pays them no mind, grabbing onto them as she eyes the expensive jewelry, surely something she loves a lot about you.

Polly comes back not too long after, and she’s quick to serve everyone another cup of tea.

You refuse any more, since you feel like you’ve already drank too much and explode your own bladder if you keep on going. And as your hand lifts to dismiss the tea from Polly, Ruby catches it.

You smile a bit at her and Michael grins slightly at the sight of the small girl being so interested in your hand. You let her twist the rings on your fingers and her gaze moves up at Michael.

His grin seems awfully contagious to her since she ends up smiling shyly at him as she continues to hold your hand up. As they do their staring contest, you look over at Charlie, who entertains himself and his mind with his new, and very loved, horse.

You sigh softly as your heart continues to beat quickly against your rib cage and you can’t tell if it’s just because you’re anxious about Michael or is it just his presence that is making you react like this.

“Have you taken your pain meds?” Polly asks.

You look up quickly as you notice that the question must be for you and a shiver runs past you as everyone’s eyes fall on you, even Gina’s.

“I will when I go to sleep.”

She gives you a disapproving look and you give her a grin in return.

“It helps me sleep.” You justify, and she sits back in her chair.

Michael grins at the exchange of words and your stubbornness and Ada notices it before continuing with her conversation.

Ruby rests your palm against hers and starts comparing both sizes.

You chuckle at her and as your body jumps at the laugh beside Michael, he looks down at Ruby to see what made you react. The small girl looks up when sensing his eyes on her and as Gina joins the conversation between the other women, Ruby extends her other hand at Michael, holding it upright.

He looks at her confused and you notice.

“She wants to compare your hand to hers.” You explain in a low whisper.

He takes his hand from his lap and extends it to her. His hands are surely bigger than yours, and that seemed to shock the small girl.

You smile as she lays her hand over his with widen eyes and Polly looks up from her tea at you, mind still on the conversation she started.

Her heart swells up at the sight. You and Michael smiling down at the girl sitting on your lap as she holds your hands up and compares them to hers. She can’t hear what you say over the loud voices and from being across the room, but she sees you saying something to Ruby, making her nod.

Michael’s smile widens at the small girl and you look up at him quickly, stealing a look before you get caught, which you don’t, not by him at least. Polly surely did, but she doesn’t say or do anything.

It’s so obvious that you still feel something for him, at least for her. But Michael seems to be unreadable, sometimes. It’s hard to figure anything out.

Gina stares at Polly while grinning at what Ada says and finds her staring at her son, she follows her gaze and clenches her jaw. The urge to roll her eyes feels stronger than her, but her bottled up rage triples at sight of you smiling.

Ruby takes her hands off yours quickly, shyly putting them close to her chest. You continue to smile down at her and as you and Michael try to retreat your own hands, she holds on to them.

Her actions are innocent, purely curious on the size of your hands, but she still leans both of your palms together, still holding them upright.

You and Michael don’t give that much of a reaction as Ruby tries to align them perfectly at the base of your palms and see the size difference from the top of your fingers.

An idea pops in your mind as your hand rests against Michael’s, and as Ruby pulls back to check the difference after so much adjusting, you slide your palm against Michael’s, so your fingers align right at the same height.

Michael chuckles at the confused look on Ruby’s face and she smiles at the contagious sound.

But as soon as the small girl notices what you’ve done, she sends you a glare, making the two of you laugh at her.

Your conjoined laughs catch everyone’s attention for a quick second and Gina doesn’t even care to take a second look. Ada smiles as she sees Ruby readjusting your palms, and, this time, it’s Michael who moves his hand, almost making his fingers only lay over half of your palm.

Ruby glares at him too and you two laugh, again.

“Alright, we’ll stop.” You tell her.

Ruby retries, but this time she has a tactic. As she makes sure that you are aligned perfectly, she holds both your and Michael’s thumb and force them to rest against the other’s back of the hand.

She leans back and stares at the difference between your hands, now happy with her achievement.

You two let her stare at the size difference with her big wide eyes, but something interrupts the sweet moment.

“Michael, honey.” Gina calls out as the conversation between everyone restarts, “Can you pass me that cup?”

Michael takes his hand off yours and you can’t help but feel disappointed at the loss of his touch. He leans forward on the couch and grabs the cup of tea for Gina from the center table, something she could easily get it herself.

You let your hand fall back to your lap and you take a sharp deep inhale, not wanting to be sitting on this couch for any longer.

You let some minutes pass, so you don’t seem like a total bitch, and when feeling ready, you lean forward on the couch, wincing in pain as your body shows to have grown sore over the lack of painkillers and from not moving at all for the past few hours.

Polly’s eyes go over to you at the sound only her seemed to notice, and you look back at her.

“I’m going to bed, I think.” You explain, making everybody get silent and look at you, “I feel exhausted.”

“Need help to find your meds?” She asks, already starting to get up, and you shake your head.

“No, no.” You hold your hand up stopping her, “Stay here. I’ll find them.”

You make sure to sit Ruby on the couch comfortably before forcing yourself up from the low couch. You fight off any sound of pain as you stand on your feet, but your face made it quite obvious.

You really should’ve taken those meds earlier.

You walk to the kitchen, trying not to show any other expression of pain, and everyone’s eyes are on you. Gina stares as you lean against the doorframe to regain your strength, yet she doesn’t feel anything in return. Not even an ounce of pity.

You stumble into the kitchen and look at the main counter, expecting the meds to be sitting right in the middle, just like you left them. But this wouldn’t be Polly’s house if they were.

Your feet get dragged as you take your time walking around to the kitchen.

You start opening every cabinet and drawer that could possibly have your meds, but there are too many to find them right away. Maybe going to bed without your meds wouldn’t be that bad.

You just need to lay down, now.

“Need help?”

You turn on your heels to find Michael by the doorway, already in the kitchen. You look away quickly back to all the drawers and try to hide any type of emotion towards his sudden appearance.

“No, I think I got it.” You answer back.

You continue to look through the many drawers and only after 2 minutes of seeing you struggle; Michael decides to move. He walks towards you and you stand still as he does so.

As he passes between you and the counter behind you, he holds onto your shoulders to make you stand back a little and let him pass. Something that surely made your skin react, but, thankfully, it all came unnoticed to him.

He opens a drawer slightly away from you and pulls out exactly what you’re looking for.

“How did you know?” You ask, curious.

“This is where she would put my meds after I got shot. It’s her drawer from stronger meds.” He explains.

How the hell did you not know that?

You walk towards him as he opens the small paper bag, taking your medicine out and handing it over to you. You take it from his hands carefully and put it down on the counter beside you.

“Thank you” You whisper at him.

You take your medicine in silence as the conversation restarts in the living room, and you try not to cringe at anything that you’re taking. Why is everything so bitter?

Whenever you’re done with one of the meds, Michael grabs them slowly and puts them back on the bag without saying anything.

He slides the drawers closed when done and you start taking the jewelry off your hands, just to start and get your way to the bed way quicker.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asks and you look up at him.

“No. But I’ll be.” You say sincerely before looking away and taking a step away from him, “That’s what matters.”

Michael notices your hesitation into continuing some sort of conversation, just like your slight cold tone, but he tries his best to ignore it.

“I’m going to bed,” You announce while turning your back to him and making your way out of kitchen.

“Good night.” He says as you reach the doorway.

You send him a tight-lipped smile and walk out, back into the living room. Polly is, of course, the first one to notice you.

“Did you find it?” She asks.

“Michael did.” You answer.

You walk over to her and once close, lean over and kiss her cheek. The rest of the family distracted with something else or some other type of conversation.

Michael walks out of the kitchen and you reach the stairs, after saying a quick good night, loud enough for everyone else to hear.

You jump up the steps with your rings in your hands as you bring your cold and clammy hands to your neck to try and unclasp your necklaces. Your eyes land on Michael’s as you reach the top floor and he’s staring back.

Gina calls his name in a whisper and he looks at her, breaking your eye contact. And as soon as his eyes reach Gina’s, he doesn’t hesitate into giving her a sweet smile.

As he looks back up while walking around the couch, his eyes meet nothing but some painting on the wall.

You’re not there anymore.

(…)

The sound of birds surrounds you, their soft and energized tweeting coming from the trees far away from you and some branches above you, as the warm summer wind hits your body like a warm hug.

You shift your position on the ground, laying on your stomach and looking up at the sky between the branches high up, far, far away from you.

Solitary clouds float over the bright blue sky, almost not shielding any land from the sunlight.

Your exposed back is warm, erupting into chills whenever Michael moves his hand. You close your eyes again and let yourself relax again.

A hand touches the side of your head softly and slowly you feel its fingers start to trace your hairline. You open your eyes, blinking the sunlight away, and look up at Michael.

His hand falls to your cheek as you move and a small smile spreads over his lips.

“Let me sleep,” You whine, and he finally gives you a full smile.

“Alright,” He answers in a whisper, “Sorry.”

You sigh and hold yourself up with your hands, you push your body up on his torso and his hands go to your waist. Not caring over only wearing a dress, you lay yours legs over his hips, straddling his lap while pulling yourself up.

“I forgive you.” You whisper back playfully.

You snuggle into the crook of his neck and his smell hits you like an embrace. The small bit of communication pulled you away from your sleepy thoughts and movements, but you still felt just as clingy and slow.

As you lay back against him, his arms wrap around you, pulling you close to him with everything in him. You snuggle in to welcome his tight hold and one of his hands stretches over your skin of your back.

You’re wearing a simple black dress, baggy from your waist down, but completely backless.

“Can we lay here for, like…” You pause, “Forever?”

Michael chuckles from under you and leans his head to the side to rest it against yours.

“We’ll get hungry eventually.” He answers, and you smile.

“I’m sure there’s some animals around here.” You continue to play around, smile prominent in your voice.

“I hope you know how to make a fire, then.”

You giggle into Michael’s neck and pull away slightly. His hold loosens slightly so you can move a bit and you look down at him.

“Don’t you know how to make a fire?” You ask and he frowns.

“Why would I?”

“I don’t know” You shrug, “Weren’t you like a country boy or something?”

With that, Michael lets out the biggest belly laugh ever, leaving you to smile as he cackles away at your words. Your tone had been obviously playful, but it still made it just as funny for him.

“I lived at a farm. I wasn’t a cave man!” He exclaims, tilting his head to look at you better.

“Sounds the same to me.”

He smiles at you and you bring one of your hands to his cheek, caressing it with your thumb. You lean in and give him the softest peck you could. When pulling away, you look at him in the eyes as he tries to pull you into another kiss. You let him, letting your lips rest over the softness of his as you too fall into the pit of slow and lovingly making out.

He sits up in the middle of the kiss and you sit over his legs as he does it. His hands travel effortlessly down your waist to your legs, lifting your skirt enough to slither in his hands underneath.

You pull away and look down at him as you stand on your knees, adjusting your seating on his thighs. You peck his lips multiple times before sitting back and eyeing him.

“I love you” He confesses in a whisper, eyes staring back onto yours, “so much”

“Really?” You ask, serious, leaning a little back and he frowns.

“Yeah…?”

He’s confused, but soon your playful smile reappears.

“How much, again?”

“A lot.”

“How much is ‘a lot’?” You keep going. “Like, ‘a lot’ like the size of a mountain or ‘a lot’ as in…” You think for a second, but he interrupts.

“How old are you again?” He teases about your childish words and you force your smile to disappear, just so you can scowl at him.

“Oh, fuck off” You say to him, “I was trying to be cute here, no need to ruin the moment for us.”

“Alright, keep going then” He says, “The size of a mountain or…?”

“Uhm… The size of…” You try to think, mind completely blank over any ideas. “The size of… the ocean?”

He chuckles at your final words and you grin.

“The ocean.” He says, sure of his words, no hesitation.

You stay silent for a bit.

“Which one?”

“Oh, come on!” He says, completely bored out of this conversation, making you laugh at him, “The biggest one you can think of”

“Really?”

“Yes. Now, can you please” He emphasizes the word comically, dragging it, “for the love of God, just tell me that you love me back?”

You kiss his lips over his frown.

“You’re so romantic.” You comment sarcastically.

“I know.”

You smile at him and decide not to give in just yet. The boy can suffer for a bit.

Telling him that you loved him now or in 5 minutes won’t exactly make that much of a difference.

You stand up on your feet, away from his lap, and he stares up at you while letting out a sigh.

“You gotta earn it.” You say with a playful look, making his frown break slightly.

“Oh really?”

“Yes.” You nod.

You take a step back as he stands up and your smile doesn’t disappear at all as you move away from him. Every step forward from Michael is a step back for you, making his urge to get to you bigger.

And soon, the running around starts.

You laugh as you run from him, sometimes feeling his fingers graze over your arms, making your heart beat faster with the adrenaline.

The tall weeds slap the skin of your exposed legs softly, tickling you as you ran away from your boyfriend. The scenery in front of you motivates into keeping on running, the summery flowers all open and colorfully staring up at the sky.

All you hear is your soft steps over the plants and the birds, it gives you peace. You can still hear Michael running behind you.

You let out a giggle as he’s about to touch you and out of nowhere, it stops.

The warm breeze lifts into a cold one and you look around confused.

You know that the weather can be unpredictable, but this is too radical for it to make sense.

Your hands start getting cold rapidly and soon your body is enveloped into complete body chills, your dress being nothing but useless when it comes to make you stay warm.

The breeze goes from cold to freezing in the matter of seconds, leaving you nothing but panicked.

You feel lightheaded and short of breath and as you try to warm yourself up with your own arms, soon you realize… You can’t feel your own palms touching your skin.

The sunlight fades as clouds fly their way in to color the skies a dark grey and you stare up.

You��re in a dream.

You’re dreaming.

You look over your shoulder at Michael to find him just as confused just a few steps away. He must have stopped running right as you did. But his skin, is not reacting like yours. His exposed arms, from the folded sleeves are not reacting to the cold in chills. It’s like it’s not affecting him.

He’s not the real Michael.

“What’s happening?” He asks you.

“I don’t know” You lie. You know exactly what’s happening.

Your dream is becoming a nightmare.

You look around as the wind gets harsher and your heart starts to beat more violently, just like your shortness of breath forces you into panting your way to find your peace again.

You step closer to Michael and cup his face.

He stares back at you still with his confused eyes and you kiss him. Your lips touch his and his hands come to rest over your waist as the wind continues to come at full force towards you.

Your hands feel numb, not being able to feel the texture of his suit, just like you had felt a few minutes prior. But you feel his hands, the way they rest on your waist, warming your skin under the violent and freezing wind.

“I love you,” You tell him as you pull away.

You open your eyes and you’re met with Michael’s pale face. His eyes are empty, with absolutely no light or sign of life.

You caress his cold cheeks with your thumbs, and you notice blood over his bottom lip. His hands had fallen a second ago from your waist, and you already miss his familiar warmth.

You bring your finger to wipe the blood away carefully and notice that it’s all over his mouth, coloring his white bottom teeth.

A small trail of blood starts falling off his nose and soon from his ears as well, slowly coloring your hands into the color red.

Red, hands completely filled with deep red, now that you try and wipe it.

Michael falls onto his knees and you do the same, holding him close to you even though it’s just his corpse. He’s cold and his hold is not even there anymore. His arms are by his sides as his head rests over your shoulder.

You wrap your arms around him, and the wind becomes more and more violent.

You force your eyes closed and let it take you too.

You open your eyes, and a loud gasp escapes your mouth. You’re not panting anymore, but your heart is beating quickly.

You try to sit up, but a sudden jab of pain hits you. You gasp and wince in pain but still bring yourself to do it. A sob escapes your mouth too right as you’re able to sit upright.

Your face feels wet and cold in the air of the room. You must have been crying before you woke up.

You whine in pain as you bring yourself to turn on the light beside you and as the warm yellow light illuminates the room, all you see is blood.

Your own blood, spread around your white shirt and white sheets, painting your hands just like in your dream.

“Pol-” You try to call out, but your voice breaks in a sob as pain runs through you.

You sob into the empty and silent air and try it again.

“Polly!” You sob out loud, hoping that that was enough to awake her if it’s late enough for that.

You wait a few long seconds for any sound coming from the hallway or stairs, but nothing.

“Polly!” You try to scream louder.

Polly holds her hand up to shut up Gina and the room falls silent. Michael leans forward from the railing of the stairs and looks at his mom confused; arms still crossed over his chest.

“Poll-” You cough.

Michael, before Polly could even get up, makes his way up the stairs and runs down the hall, trying his best to be fast enough to get to your room.

Your door swings open and you continue to sob as the lights are turned on.

“I don’t know what I did wrong.” You sob to whoever is at the door, staring down at your hands, “I-I, I woke up and…”

Michael shakes his shock away at the sight of your bed all bloodied, just like your hands, and walks towards you. His eyes fall to your shirt and notices from where your blood is coming from, your wound.

“Mom!” Michael shouts while looking up at the door.

Your ears start to buzz as panic starts to set in in your system and two hands move yours away from your eyes.

“You’re okay, you’re okay.” The voice repeats and you sob helplessly.

Michael sits in front of you in the bed and brings you close to him, ignoring that he’s now being covered in blood as well.

He makes you rest your hands on his shoulders so that they’re away from your eyes and starts to unbutton some of the buttons of your shirt.

Polly finally gets to the door and the sight is absolutely terrifying.

“She ripped stitches. I think.”

Polly forces herself to walk to the bed and to help Michael check your wound. He continues to unbutton your shirt with one hand only and he’s quick to rip the bandage off.

You sob in pain as he does it and both him and Polly try to look past the blood and ignore your sobs to see what happened to your wound. It opened, maybe 3 of the 9 stitches ripped.

“I’ll call the doctor.” Polly says.

Michael nods and holds you closer to him, not wanting you to move too far away. Your side rests against his chest and he wraps an arm around your shoulders, while one of his hands grabs the sheets and holds them over the wound.

You sob silently while leaning closer to him and he looks up at your face.

“Hey. You’re okay, look at me.” He whispers at you and you do it, “You’re okay. It’s not too bad. You’re safe. I promise.”

You stare at him in the eyes and he leans his forehead against yours.

“You’re okay” He whispers lower.

You nod as tears continue to roll down your face and he nods with you. Your breathing starts to slow down, and he presses a kiss over your wet cheek.

“I got you.” He whispers against your skin.

(…)

Michael sighs loudly as he walks into the kitchen and he feels exhausted.

“Is the doctor finished?” Polly asks him and he just nods, “And her?”

“Passed out before he could even start” He answers, “The doctor said to just let her sleep.”

He walks towards the sink and he turns on the water, holding his bloody hands under it. The two women standing in the kitchen are silent, watching him wash his hands carelessly while staring at the wall.

“I’ll go get you a clean shirt.” Polly says.

His mom walks out of the kitchen and he turns off the water, turning around to face Gina.

“Are we going to the hotel after this?” She asks softly.

“I can drive you there, but I’m staying here, tonight.”

She takes a deep breath and brings her hands to her head, annoyed.

“Why? She’s asleep. You can visit her tomorrow.” She tries.

“I’ll sleep better here.”

She scoffs.

“You’re fucking unbelievable.”

“I’m unbelievable?” Michael answers, bringing his hand up to point at his own chest.

“Yes!” She almost screams, “You are unbelievable! And you want to know why?” She asks, “Because no matter what I fucking do or fucking say, you will always put her before me.”

“Always, Gina? Are you serious?” Michael asks in disbelief, “You’ve been my fucking priority ever since we met, and now because I show some sort of affection towards a girl that is fucking bleeding and crying her lungs out, I’m supposedly putting her before you?”

“Yes! I don’t even know what you had with her before me!” She shouts, “Ever since I step foot into this shit hole I’ve been listening to her name and seeing her over and over again. Do you really think I believe that she’s simply a ‘family friend’?” She air-quotes.

“You want the truth?” He asks, no shouting needed, but he sounds mad.

“Yes.”

“We dated for 4 years, almost 5. I ended our relationship when in America.” He answers and Gina stands silent, “See? I can tell you the truth when you ask nicely.”

“And if you broke up why do you still like her?” She asks, ignoring his hateful tease at the end of his sentence.

“You have to be joking-”

“Are you going to say that that’s a lie?” She asks, crossing her arms over her chest, “Let me give you some of my truth, Michael. I honestly don’t give a shit about what you two went through, or if you were in a good relationship or not when with her, but you broke up. I don’t care why, but you did. And there was a time when you chose me over her. That’s why you proposed, right?”

Michael doesn’t answer her.

“So, please, for the love of God, stop being a child and move on with your life. You’ve been mopping around her, touching her all the time as if you’re dying to do it at every second of the day… Even if she does still like you, you are with me now, not her.” She spits at him, “Move. On. She’s not yours anymore, Michael. I am.”

He swallows hard at her words and looks at her emptily.

Polly makes her way back inside the kitchen, acting as if she didn’t hear a thing, but that seems to not scare off Gina from continuing.

“Are you even listening to m-?”

“I am.”

“Then say something, Michael.” She scolds, “Is it not true, what I’m saying?”

Polly looks between them as if waiting for it to evolve in any way, and simply extends her hand towards Michael, so he can grab the clean shirt.

“Is she your priority or no-”

“Yes.” Michael answers, “Y/N is my priority.” He nods, sure of himself and his words. “Yes, I’m engaged to you, Gina, but I care for her, and she will always be my priority.”

Gina bites her tongue and looks at Michael.

It honestly comes to no surprise. She had just thrown these words at him not that long ago, at lunch. He had just never confirmed it for her, and now… he did. But ‘always’? You will always be his priority? Now, that, doesn’t sit right with her.

They stand in silence and Michael leans back on the counter, finally taking the shirt from his mom’s hands. He thanks her with a look but to no avail because her eyes are not even on him.

“You’re serious?” Gina comments in slight disbelief.

“I am.” Michael confirms.

“What does that mean for us, then?” She asks.

Michael stays silent and the blonde slides off the highchair she has been sitting on, standing on her heels. Her eyes stay on him as tears threaten to swell up at her eyes.

“I’m not sure.” Michael answers truthfully.

She nods at his words and brings her eyes to the ground. She feels disappointed but mostly betrayed. Her eyes are good to show that emotion, but soon, it evolves into something else. Pure anger. Anger over the betraying words and truth, the one that just got thrown around as if it was nothing.

And Polly notices it.

“I think it’s better if you leave, Gina.”

Michael takes his eyes off his fiancée to stare at his mother, who just opened her mouth. He didn’t expect her to get herself involved in his worries, but she did.

“What?” Gina asks, bringing her head back up to stare at Polly.

“You heard me.”

Her eyes travel to Michael in hopes that he would defend her, but nothing. He’s just staring back at her, almost holding the same look as his mother.

He doesn’t want her here. He wants her to leave.

She shakes her head, overcome with emotion, and forces her feet to move. Her palms tingle with the idea of hitting something, or rather, someone, but her eyes fill with tears.

How could have she been so stupid?

She slams the front door shut behind her and the Gray family stand in the kitchen unphased.

“Rather dramatic that one, uh?” Polly asks her son.

Michael doesn’t answer her venomous comment, but that didn’t seem to surprise her. His mother walks around the counter and grabs the cup Gina used for her whiskey, bringing it to the sink so she can wash it.

It’s like this conversation didn’t affect her a slight bit.

Michael feels weird. He doesn’t regret telling Gina anything but the look she gave him spoke more than any of her words could. She felt betrayed by him, and she was holding back so many emotions and words.

He knows that if it wasn’t for his mom, Gina would be screaming at him, maybe even throwing stuff at the walls. Just like she usually does when she’s upset. But she didn’t do anything, she decided to contain herself and not scream or even curse him out.

And honestly, Michael doesn’t know what’s worse. The fact that she could be destroying his mom’s kitchen or the fact that she’s bottling up all her frustration and anger.

He thought he knew Gina before coming back home, but the trip only made him and her show their true colors. One can’t stop comparing his newfound love to his old one, and the other obsesses over the idea of power and desperately wanting to overthrow anyone in her way.

Quite a pair, that’s for sure.

(…)

You open your eyes as the lights burns your eyelids open and an involuntary groan runs off your mouth as you’re hit with the morning light right in the face. You turn your head to the side, but you’re met with another window with the curtains open.

“Fuck.” You curse out loud.

You sit up and another sound escapes your mouth, but this time, a whimper of pain.

It takes you a few seconds to connect the dots and you finally remember why you’re in pain in the first place.

“Jesus Christ.” You comment to yourself, again.

Your bloody sheets are set to the side, right next to your door, and before your mind could even try to process it, you push any thoughts of your nightmare away from you.

You pull yourself up carefully and try to ignore the tightness that you feel over your wound. You’re not quite sure what happened after the doctor appeared, but if you’re still at Polly’s house, it could only mean one thing…

It’s not as bad as it looked.

You walk to the bathroom and the sight that meets your eyes is, just, great.

Your shirt is mostly unbuttoned, bloodied, just like your bra. Some of your skin has been cleaned, but not all. Your face as some blood smeared on it, but it doesn’t surprise you. You remember moving so much when you woke up, it would be a miracle it your feet would be clean.

You throw the clothes into the bin and start cleaning yourself off. You can’t exactly bath over having to make the wound be dry at all times. But you have been able to manage quite nicely. With weird positions, for sure, but you’re able to wash your body and hair quite nicely.

You put on some washed clothes on and make your way out of the bedroom. It must be really early since the house is more than silent.

Before you walk down the stairs, you walk over to the guest’s room just to check. Finn is laying on his back over the large bed, mouth partly open as some light snores escape his lips, making you smile at him.

You take a step back and close the door back up. He must’ve gotten here after the doctor.

You make your way down the stairs easily, and as soon as your eyes land on the couch, you see Michael.

He’s awake with a mug on his hands, eyes on the carpet as he is completely lost in thought. He has a scowl over his face, hiding any kind of emotion from anyone’s eyes, and as your feet finally meet the last step, he looks up.

His scowl disappears and a slight grin appears over his lips.

“Good morning.” You say before he could.

“Good morning.” He answers back.

You walk towards him and he watches you as you carry yourself with ease over to the couch. You take a seat next to him and notice that his mug is still filled with warm coffee.

He extends the mug your way when noticing your interest and you smile, taking it.

“Thank you.” You whisper.

The hot mug burns your cold palms, and you welcome the almost uncomfortable heat into your skin. You bring it to your lips and take a small sip of the dark liquid.

You’re sitting close to Michael, sitting on top of one of your legs as you sit looking at him. You’re not wearing much more than a shirt, exposing your legs to him and to anyone in the house, but you don’t seem uncomfortable with your lack of clothing.

“Are you feeling okay?” He asks and you bring the mug down from your mouth, licking your lips at the same time.

“Yeah” You nod.

You give him back his mug after taking your generous sips and he takes it back onto his hands.

“When did Finn get here?” You ask him, curious.

“About half an hour after the doctor left.” He answers, leaning forward to put down the burning mug on the coffee table, finding it impossible to drink from how hot it is, still.

You nod at as his answer and while you’re thinking about what else to ask, he speaks again.

“You scared the living shit out of us last night.” He says, making you look back at him.

His eyes are back on the carpet and your chest tightens at the sight.

“I’m sorry.” You apologize.

“Don’t.” He says, finally looking back up, “It’s not your fault.”

He leans back on the couch and both of you continue to look at each other. The air is not thick as it usually is, it’s light and easy to breathe in. Your looks are both familiar, always taking your minds back in time for a quick second.

Your mind takes you to your dream and soon his pale face reappears in your mind. You shake the thoughts away, right as Michael opens his mouth to talk.

“Are you hungry?” He asks, “I can make you something to eat.”

You smile widely at him and bring your hands to your lap.

“Are you finally proving yourself useful around the house?” You tease, making him smile back, “I must be in a dream. Since when do you-”

“I’ve always been able to cook” He defends himself.

“Yeah, right.”

“It’s true!”

“Michael, you couldn’t even cook potatoes!”

“Couldn’t!” He says to you, leaning forward to be right in front of you, “Things have changed in my kitchen.”

A laugh escapes your lips as he smiles down at you and he stands from the couch. He gives you his hand and as soon as your palms touch, he pulls you up from the couch.

“Come on, I’ll show you my experienced cooking.” He encourages as you take small, demotivated steps his way, “Do you want me to make you potatoes, just so I can prove my point?”

“No.” You giggle, “Just- Do whatever.”

He turns around and starts walking to the kitchen, letting your hand fall from his as you stay a little behind.

“You know what?” You ask him as you get in the kitchen, making him look back at you, “Maybe you’re not as insufferable as I thought you were”

Michael laughs at your words as you say them, and he nods.

“Oh, why, thank you!” He says enthusiastically, “Aren’t you lovely right as the sun rises?”

You let out a loud laugh and he moves over behind the island counter, looking around the cabinets to look for something to cook for you.

You stare at the back of his head as he walks around and take a seat on one of the chairs.

One could get used to this.

Taglist: @ohhersheybars @woodland-mist @onlythechicagoway @soleil-dor @finn-shelbys-bulldog @oh-theres-a-woman @peakyxtommy @ms-reader @beautycinders @lovemissyhoneybee @graceedwards @jadesbabylon @marvelismylifffe @a-dorky-book-keeper @peakascum @shanetoo @hufflemendes @cherrytop02 @http-cherries @burnitup @livingforbarnes @iccyyyybitch @ravennaofasgar @carezzesuigraffi @fernweh-fangirl @hufflepeople @huskyhunny @desertgremlin @fireawayxx @lemur46 @sugarcoated-lame @i-sneeze-to-appease @gabytodd @cococola-cocaine @namelesslosers

If you’d like to be apart of the taglist, let me know.

Hope you enjoyed this! If would like to make any questions about the characters or when the next part will be available. My ask box is always open.

#michael gray x reader #michael gray #michael gray imagine #michael gray imagines #michael gray fic #michael gray fanfic #peaky blinders #peaky blinders imagine #peaky blinders imagines #finn cole #finn cole x reader #finn cole imagine #finn cole imagines

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dalekofchaos · 3 years

Text

Rey’s lack of motivation and stake in the Sequel Trilogy

I have a question to ask you. What are Rey’s motivations? What are her wants and goals and why is she even drawn to the conflict between The First Order and The Resistance?

Rey’s motivations in the Sequels.

Rey wants to find her parents.

Wants to bring back Luke Skywalker

Rey wants to find her place

Wants Ben to return to the light

Has no real motivation to be on either side of the conflict, but chooses The Resistance anyway

Says she wants to kill Palpatine in cold blood, was close to giving in

Now she chose to fuck off to Tatooine and we see very little in her motivation to do....ANYTHING

Let’s compare Anakin and Luke’s motivations.

What are Anakin's motivations?

Wants to leave a life of slavery and come back and free his mother

Wants to become a Jedi and become a hero

Wants to protect Padme

Wants to save Obi-Wan

Wants to stop Dooku and end the war before it can begin

Wants to be a good master to Ahsoka

Wants to clear Ahsoka’s name

Wants to stop the war

Wants to save Padme and his children's lives at the cost of the Jedi and doing whatever it takes and becomes Darth Vader

What are Luke’s motivations?

Luke is a farm boy who dreams of leaving his mundane life.

Luke discovers that his father -unlike what his uncle told him, was a heroic Jedi Knight

Luke, is reluctant and refuses the ‘call to adventure’, but after the Empire murders his Aunt and Uncle, he decides to Join Obi-Wan on the quest.

Save the Princess

Luke is angered by Obi-Wan’s death at the hands of Darth Vader, and seeks retribution.

Destroy the Death Star and save the Rebellion

To be trained by Yoda

Save Han and Leia

Luke discovers his father, the heroic Jedi, is none other than Darth Vader. After years of training, he sets out to redeem his father and turn him back to the light.

After the redemption of his father and fall of the Empire, Luke goes on a journey to restore The Jedi Order

Compare Rey and Luke’s journeys in ANH and TFA. Rey wanders around and stuff is handed to her. Luke takes initiative and works for what he has. Let's compare ANH with TFA

Luke screws up on watching R2, then chooses to chase him down. He makes another mistake by spying on the Tusken Raiders instead of getting the hell out of dodge. This leads to him being knocked out, and rescued by Ben Kenobi.

Luke initiates the meeting with Ben Kenobi, and it happens because of his early bad decisions.

His aunt & uncle are killed, but thanks to his screw-up with R2 & the raiders, he and the droids are spared.

He chooses to follow Kenobi to Alderaan instead of staying on Tattooine.

He chooses to accept Kenobi's instruction in the ways of the Force, even though most people think it's a myth and a joke. Even though he's bad at it and doesn't seem to get any results at first.

He makes the decision that they're going to rescue Leia, potentially dooming their escape from the Death Star. This sets off a chain of events that leads to Kenobi's death.

Then he chooses to help fight the Death Star, even though he's not a member of the rebellion. He was offered a job with Han, and he could have ensured his safety by leaving with them. Instead he chose certain death.

Finally, he chooses to trust a literal voice in his head instead of the targeting computer.

Let's contrast that with Rey.

BB-8 runs into her. She tries to send him away, but relents and lets him follow her home.

She chooses not to sell him for food.

Finn wanders into camp on his own initiative.

The camp is attacked because BB-8 is there. The camp would have been attacked no matter what Rey did. The other scavenger was, I'm pretty sure, from the same camp. And if she'd sold him, BB-8 would also have still been in the camp.

She is forced to take the Millennium Falcon when the ship she wanted to use was blown up.

She chooses to go with Finn and bring BB-8 to the Rebellion Resistance.

She stumbles upon Luke's lightsaber, and runs away from it.

She accidentally runs into Kylo Ren while hiding in the forest.

He chooses to kidnap her because he senses something special about her.

After her first exposure to the Force, she learns how to use some of it, successfully, and escapes from Ren. And to her credit, escaping and trying the Force out is a choice she made, rather than something that passively happened to her.

Then she, um, is standing there when Han is killed.

She chooses to fight Kylo Ren, and beats him in her first lightsaber battle after closing her eyes and thinking about the Force.

She sort of chooses to go summon Luke back to civilization - I say sort of because it's not clear why she was picked to go over, say, Leia.

Luke makes mistakes, and he is an active participant in his story. Rey is just kind of there, most of the time. She doesn't make mistakes, but she doesn't really do much else.

Rey has no personal stake in this war or motivations and she’s supposed to be the main protagonist.

Rey has never left Jakku before TFA and she tells Han that ”she never knew so much green existed” when they go to Maz’s castle.

In other words Rey must have had very limited knowledge of the world outside of Jakku and all she has heard from it are stories.

Rey who barely knows anything about the rest of the galaxy, to the point that she didn’t even know that forests existed what exactly is her personal stake in the current galactic conflict?

In TFA we saw The New Republic’s capital systems blown up by Starkiller Base and we never saw a reaction from Rey. We do see Finn and Han’s reactions. Also worth noting about Rey is that if she was unconscious throughout her involuntary travel to the Starkiller Base she was never actually aware of the Starkiller Base until just before Han, Finn and Chewie started planting the explosions in order to sabotage it.

Luke, while he had no personal attachments to Aldeeran did actually get to see the horrible aftermaths of it’s destruction.

But Rey was barely affected by the destruction of the Capital systems. Most characters were not as affected as they should have been in my opinion but we didn’t even get to see her have an emotional reaction to it.

This was probably the greatest genocide in Star Wars history and our main heroine is unaffected by it? Finn has a reaction to it and he’s supposedly NOT the main protagonist?

Rey really has no reason to care about the state of the galaxy. She only seems to care if people she knows are in danger.

The fact that she is supposed to be our main hero of this trilogy when she has next to no personal stakes in the well-being of the rest of the galaxy feels wrong to me.

Finn actually has stakes in this conflict since the FO took his family and childhood away from him and Poe has stakes because he actually lives in the New Republic and doesn’t want it to be under FO’s rule. Yet neither Finn nor Poe are considered the main protagonist? But oh wait, I forgot we can’t have a black or Latino man be the leading protagonist in Star Wars

The more I think about it is Rey has no goals or agency as a protagonist. She’s just whatever the plot demands her to be. Rey doesn’t actively take the initiative and make decisions, and simply react to the world around her. There is never a reason given as to why she wants to be a Jedi. Sure, she’s heard the stories about them, but she doesn’t dream to be one like Anakin, and the writers are so obsessed over her parents that they never develop any other motivation besides that. She has to be strung along the story so she can take part in it, hence she is repeatedly chased and kidnapped throughout TFA to get her to the Resistance where she decides to find Luke because she has nowhere else to go. Part of the reason she doesn’t even train with Luke is because she has no reason to, as she’s just supposed to find him. Rey joins the fight simply in reaction to learning that Luke is responsible for Ben’s fall. She’s only ever a Jedi and a member of the Resistance out of necessity- she has no where left to go and has to fight in self defense- so they try hamfist in some motives that she needs to stop herself from becoming like Palpatine but there is no tension as it’s the final act. By the end of the trilogy it’s not even clear if the Jedi Order will return because Rey never seems to want to be one and we can only assume they will return for meta reasons- because the audience knows the ST is a copypasta of the OT.

What exactly was Rey’s motivation for getting involved in the Galactic conflict before TROS? Luke was told that his father was killed by Darth Vader and later his family gets murdered by the empire so he had personal stakes to get involved in the conflict.

Anakin was a Jedi and had lived in the Republic for ten years by the time of the Clone Wars begun so he had personal reasons to get involved in the conflict.

Rey meanwhile grew up so isolated of Jakku that she had no idea forests existed and she didn’t lose anything and the FO attacked her on Jakku. In fact she wanted to return to Jakku after she had dumped BB-8 with the Resistance. Her primary motivation in TFA was to reunite with her family but the movie never establish that her family’s absence was connected to the galactic conflict in any way.

That connection isn’t established until TROS so what was her motivation until than? The Death of Han? A guy she had known for two hours? Finn? A guy she also had maybe only knew for about two hours total by the time of their hug in TLJ? Also she seemed to have completely forgotten about Finn by the time she want on a quest to redeem the guy that has far as she should have known by that point was still in a coma with his spine permanently damaged because of Kylo.

Rey’s motivation seems to either be finding her family or her dealing with her existential crisis neither had much of a connection with the galactic conflict until TROS

#Star Wars #Rey #Luke Skywalker #Anakin Skywalker #Anti Sequel Trilogy #Anti Lucasfilm #Finn #Poe Dameron #Rey Skywalker

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marauderss-hp · 3 years

Text

Nothing they could do

i hate this with every fibre of my being but you all wanted to see it so yeah...i wrote this. i don’t know why. i don’t believe for a second that this would happen in any universe and i don’t want it to happen...but i still wrote it. oh yeah there was something on the discord that went something like this but different so i kinda took inspo from there...i don’t know whether to thank you or not for this

word count: 2,065

characters belong to @lumosinlove

Leo wasn’t sure when it all started to fall apart. When they all started to drift away from each other. He assumed it just happened gradually, waking up and not getting a hello, not saying hello. Leaving without getting a goodbye kiss, not giving a goodbye kiss. It still hurt to think how far they had gotten, how much they had pushed each other away. It was a good thing their apartment had three bedrooms. They were all back in use. He didn’t know how that started either. One day they had all gotten up to head to bed and walked into Finn’s room, their room, pulling on their clothes. And Logan walked out and shut the door to his own room. Leo didn’t stop him. Neither did Finn. He looked across to the older boy, his emotionless face staring back at him, his hands motioning towards the door. Signalling for him to leave too. He didn’t question it. He didn’t try to stay. He just grabbed his clothes and went, pausing outside Logan’s door, to listen for something, anything that might mean he would come back out. He didn’t.

He had laid there the whole night staring at the unfamiliar cover and the unfamiliar walls, knowing that next to him was Logan and next to Logan was Finn. All he had to do was walk out the door and a couple of steps down the hall. That was all it would take to crawl back into the familiar room with the familiar cover and the familiar walls. But he didn’t. Because something inside him was telling him that this was happening for a reason. He didn’t know what it was but he wasn’t going to question it.

The team had started to notice something too. Finn would take one car there, Logan the other and Leo would always come in early with Kasey. They wouldn’t hover over each other’s stalls, wouldn’t be attached at every limb anymore. And they would leave the same way. Leo catching a lift with Kasey, Logan taking one car, Finn taking the other. Nobody questioned it. They all wanted to, but nobody did. Games were far worse. There was no connection there anymore, no spark. No congratulatory jumps and kisses back in the locker room. The team couldn’t remember the last time they saw them kiss.

Team dinners out went the same way. They would never turn up together, sometimes one of them just wouldn’t turn up at all. They would sit at opposite ends of each other, distancing as much as they could, despite the team all trying to get there early to make sure they would only be able to sit next to each other. When that did happen, they would stand there, look around, and grab another chair, dragging it anywhere they could, as far away as they could.

Roadies were the worst. They had gone from getting a room with one bed to two to trying to get one with three, to one of them knocking on the doors of the team asking if they could bunk with them. It was James mostly, he was alone now that Sirius was with Remus. He didn’t try and push them into talking. He would sit and watch Finn stress read, violently turning the pages he once took so much care in preserving. He would see Leo lay back, earphones in eyes closed, shut off from the world. And the worst. He would lay with Logan staring at the wall, no music, no book. Just stare at the wall, once bright eyes dull, once young face, emotionless and tired. He wouldn’t push them into talking. But he watched them.

The team watched them get worse and worse with nothing they could do. They could have dealt with the arguments with the constant screaming match. At least then they would know exactly what was going on. But the silence. The silence was deafening. They hadn’t spoken a word to each other in weeks in front of them and they were guessing it had lasted even longer behind closed doors. They didn’t know what to say. They didn’t know how they could help. Logan wouldn’t talk to Sirius or Dumo, Leo wouldn’t talk to Kasey or Remus and Finn wouldn’t talk to James or even Alex when he would be around the rink with Kasey. Their team was no longer a team.

They had cracked one day when they were getting ready to leave, Logan accidentally dropping something on the floor, and Finn tripping over it heading straight into Leo. And when it happened…the team no longer wanted the arguments or the screaming match. Because it was horrible. Seeing the people who had gone through so much to be together at each other’s throats like this...they couldn’t help it if they started crying themselves, shocked...afraid. Finn was in Logan’s face, Logan was snarling and Leo looking like he wanted to run and never show his face again. The team was frozen in place. None of them made a move to break it apart, none of them made a move when it started getting worse, when Leo sunk to the floor, emotionless eyes watching as though he had been waiting and waiting for this to finally happen.

It was Moody who had finally done something, hearing the commotion from down the hall and dragging them away from each other. Arthur and Heather followed afterwards, each taking a boy. All that could be heard was Moody’s loud and icy voice echoing down the hall from where he had pulled Logan to his office, Arthur trying to get Finn to say something about what had happened and Heather trying to get Leo to say anything as they walked out of the room. Nobody did anything else. They turned to each other, similar expressions on each of their faces. But did nothing else.

Somehow they weren’t surprised when Dumo told them the day after that Logan had turned up in the middle of the night with a suitcase and a stony face. They weren’t surprised when Remus said that Leo had asked to stay the night at their place with a bag and broken look. Regulus had been called at once and had been round almost straight away, coaxing him into drinking and eating while Sirius and Remus started the journey to the apartment. They weren’t surprised to see Finn sat there the same way he had sat every other time they had seen him. Empty. Cold. They had tried to get him to talk to explain what in the hell happened between the two of them. Some distance away Leo was getting the same talk from Regulus and Dumo was trying his hardest to get Logan to say something. They never got their answers.

It wasn’t a surprise when Logan headed straight past them the following week and straight to Coach’s office, shutting the door behind him. They had all been waiting for it. The day one of them asked for a transfer. They just weren’t expecting it to be so soon. They had all hoped that things would have calmed down by now, but they didn’t know what had been happening for weeks before this. And when Logan stormed back in with a glare nobody wanted to mess with, they didn’t do anything. They sat and watched him pack his things and leave, watched Finn stare at him walk out the door, watched Leo’s eyes never leave the floor.

It was two weeks after that when Finn was the one heading to see Coach with a determined look on his broken face. This time they did try to do something. They tried to get Leo to lift his head from where he always had it pointing to the floor unless it was on the ice. It didn’t work. They stayed back when Finn came and passed Leo to get to his bag and watched him sling it over his shoulder and walk forward. They held their breath in hope when he stopped and turned to face Leo and felt their hearts crack when all he did was place the keys to the apartment on the bench. Leo still didn’t look up.

He never played the same again after that and the team were worried. This had been Leo’s dream and he just wasn’t feeling it anymore. They had only just managed to scrape through every game after that, everyone having to work to keep the scores apart as Leo didn’t seem to care when a puck went past his shoulder, between his legs. He just lifted his helmet, grabbed a drink and went back down. The team weren’t sure whether or not he had on his goalie face or just...his new regular face. It never changed. Every day his face stayed the same, the sunshine boy that used to light up the team gone.

They saw Logan and Finn after that of course, Finn on the Rangers and Logan had transferred to Tampa Bay. Finn had moved back with his parents and the team sometimes were given updates on how he was doing. They were rare. Logan was with Alex and the team often let their minds wander at exactly how that was going. Living with your...boyfriend’s...ex-boyfriend’s brother. They weren’t even sure whether the cubs had officially broken up. They just seemed to...fade away. Alex gave more updates on Logan to Kasey who in turn passed them along to the team. At first, they tried to make sure they were talking in front of Leo to get a reaction out of him. It never worked. So they never talked about the boys in front of him again.

It was hard when they played games against each other. The three of them. It wasn’t competitive, it wasn’t sad. It was just...something. And nobody on any of the teams could place what that something was. Logan was just as fierce on the ice as ever, if not more so and Finn never seemed to shoot at the goal unless he knew it was going to go in. Almost like he was trying to say something. The cubs didn’t read into it. The team didn’t read into it. They did nothing. What could they do?

Leo had said around five words in two months and most of them had only been to Reg who seemed to never leave his side anymore. He had moved back into the apartment on his own at first until Reg decided that he didn’t trust that Leo was taking care of himself and decided to move there with him. That was when Leo had said the first two words since...well since they could remember. Reg was setting up on the couch. He knew there were two perfectly good rooms that he could take, but he knew that those two rooms had been in use not that long ago and he didn’t want to make things worse for Leo. They had been sitting on the couch eating whatever Reg had been able to put together with what was in the fridge before he went to the shops when Leo had said it. It’s okay. Reg was confused at first until Leo pointed his head in the direction of the two empty rooms, conveying a silent message. You can use it. He didn’t know which one Leo was using yet, all the doors closed until later on when he opened the one on the far left. The one with the biggest bed. And Regulus’ heart broke all over again for his best friend as he wandered into the room where the three of them used to be. He still showed no emotion. His eyes were still blank.

The team had decided that there was truly nothing they could do. What could they do? Leo wasn’t talking and Logan and Finn hadn’t even tried to get in to contact with any of them unless they made the first move. As much as it broke them to let the boys stay broken, there was no way they would be able to fix this for them. So they didn’t try to. They still received their sparse updates and they still tried to get to Leo to talk. But they didn’t push. There was nothing they could do.

#yeah i’m sorry #angst #is it angst?#i’m gonna say yes #lumosinlove #sweater weather #coast to coast #leo knut #finn o’hara #logan tremblay #o’knutzy

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missorgana · 3 years

Text

everything i do (gonna think of you)

pairing: finn/poe dameron

fandom: star wars (sequel trilogy

rating: teen and up

word count: 4690

warning: swearing, alcohol

summary: Finn and Poe are on a break. Neither of them are okay. But Finn hears Poe singing about him on the radio, and they'll be okay. Always. (musician poe, artist finn, long distance break-up + getting back together)

(it’s been ages but my space bfs, it’s good to be back!! a long overdue installment in my finnpoe alphabet series. did not expect e to be the most difficult letter to work with !!! thank you to Cat / @wendigostag as ALWAYS for beta reading and supporting my messy ideas 🥰 love uuuu. enjoy??)

read on ao3

“And now for the moment you’ve all been waiting for, I’m sure!”

The audience erupts in a half-laughter, half-cheer, and the host smiles, looking a bit too tired for his age.

“Tonight’s special performance is by someone who has, quite frankly, taken the whole of America - and dare I say the world? - by storm!”

Previous cheers resurface, louder and more certain than before. Even a few wolf whistles, making the presenter laugh as well.

“Here to perform his new single ‘cardigan’ from the debut album ‘folklore’, Poe Dameron!”

Quite literally everyone in the studio goes crazy, and as the camera directs towards the stage, a light turns on and reveals the curly haired man in all his glory.

He smiles slyly to the audience. A few noises, bordering on the line of screaming, makes him chuckle, but he puts all his focus on the guitar. Snaps, strums, and as the piano starts accompanying him, a soft voice forming strange and unfamiliar words.

Finn wipes the tear away in frustration before it even gets a chance to move, just tiny droplets stinging his vision. He’s sniffling, and biting his cheek, staring at the already half-empty bottle of red wine on the table.

Never in his life has he ever felt more pathetic, that’s true.

He doesn’t know why he’s watching this. And judging by the two texts pinging in on his phone, his best friend Rey somehow knows he’s doing it, too.

His vision’s too blurry to type, he thinks. Fuck it, pour another glass of wine. Who cares?

On the screen, Poe smiles while singing each word. But Finn knows the man better than anyone in that studio to know that it’s not really a smile. It’s the kind that his boyfriend- ex-boyfriend put on at their last FaceTime call. The one where he suggested they took a break.

He figures he should turn off the television when the performance comes to an end. No need to rub anymore salt in the wound, as Rey said.

Yet Finn sticks around for the interview because… because what? He hates himself? He hates Poe?

Neither. Maybe he misses him. Of course he misses him, enough to fight back the sobs, far from sober. But he’ll fight that obvious realisation, as well.

“Thank you for coming in tonight!” the host tells the singer, who thanks him in turn for the opportunity. Always the golden boy. The image of polite, kind, heart full of love, yet so goddamn stubborn.

“Mothers love me.” Poe had told him, back in college, the smug idiot. Finn’s mother loves him.

It’s mostly questions about the album, the upcoming tour, pictures of his parents and his pearly whites gleam when he speaks of them, how proud they are of him. It envelops Finn like a warm embrace. Huh. They haven’t hugged in five months.

They haven’t seen each other in five months.

Then the host starts grinning like a maniac, and he’s got a hunch what’s coming now is what he’s been wanting to ask all along, “Evidently, you got a lot of ladies who love you here.”

Audience cheers. Poe runs a hand through his hair. He’s so nervous, it’s adorable.

“You got a special lady in your life?” a question that quiets the audience significantly, still, waiting.

The singer glances at his shoes like they’re the most fascinating thing in the universe. Finn can’t hold his glass still, because, yeah. He looks like he’s thinking about it too hard. He wants to save him from that situation.

And although it feels like a million years pass, it’s probably only ten seconds before the reply settles, “Not at the moment, no.”

The crowd is nothing less than thrilled. And not only women, as the host implied, nah, everyone in that studio recognizes what a heartthrob Poe Dameron is. Finn couldn’t agree more.

What he knows about his ex-boyfriend that the strangers in the TV don’t know is, obviously, that Poe’s not interested in the ladies.

So does his family and close friends, anyone out of show business, really.

He also knows why his ex-boyfriend isn’t out to the public about his sexuality, yet. Or he’s got an idea. Maybe. Finn convinces himself of that, because then, he can also convince himself that he’s not the only one still feeling he’s being torn to pieces by this breakup. Feels better.

Although the screen connecting to his boyfriend’s call tugs on his heartstrings with its familiar warmth, Finn is, above all, pissed.

And for some reason, he feels ashamed for that. He knows he shouldn’t.

Poe hasn’t been home in a month. He was supposed to be here two weeks ago, but due to press bookings, credit to his boyfriend’s brand new agent, he called Finn late at night apologising like a broken record and promising to make it up to him.

And it makes him feel like shit.

Every apology made him feel more guilty for… harboring his time. Which is crazy, because they’ve been going steady for three years. They talked about this, the possibility of long distance, and knew, definitely, that it was gonna be hard, especially since they’ve been attached by the hip for so long.

Thing is, this has happened three times now, and it’s made Finn question himself.

Is he good enough for Poe? then later, another thought creeps in, Is Poe tired of him? or… is he not in love with him anymore?

Finn feels like he’s going crazy.

And even when he sees his boyfriend’s soft curls and eyes full of sunshine pop on his phone, it’s those thoughts that still inhabit his head. Fuck.

“Baby!” Poe says, excitement gleaming right through him and into Finn’s bedroom. They’ve been talking about moving in together, but, well, with long distance, mostly only talk for now. He’s off chasing the fame, which he deserves more than anyone, thank you very much, and Finn’s already booked up with art galleries and auctions eagerly grasping for his paintings. It feels like they’ve made it.

Except, “Phasma’s got me on Jimmy Kimmel! Like, can you believe that?!” his boyfriend spills out everything from this week, and it warms Finn’s chest, his gut, all the way down to his toes. But at the same time, this being Poe’s first words to him stirs weirdly alongside that warmth.

His career’s important. Of course. Finn’s happy for him, like, over the moon, all the way across the solar system happy.

He wants him to be successful. So then… then why does it feel like Poe prioritises it over them? It’s probably him overthinking it, he reasons. Again.

Finn can definitely feel he’s supposed to be sleeping right now; that’s another thing, cursed with being in vastly different time zones. He listens, smiling half-tiredly, thoughts wandering to everything and nothing.

Which is why he finds himself, all of a sudden, replying to his boyfriend’s, “I, uh, I’m actually writing you another song. Don’t laugh, please,” with, “A secret kind of song? ”

It takes Poe by surprise, visibly, and it takes himself, as well.

Finn bites down on his tongue in the cringe of it all. His boyfriend’s blinking, slowly, probably waiting for some sort of elaboration, but when he has no idea what to say, Poe inquires, “What do you mean?”

He sighs. Wholeheartedly, wistfully, nostalgic.

Finn thinks about when Poe asked him out, driving up to his window in true cheesy romantic comedy style and having offered to write essays in exchange for a school marching band performance.

Their first date, eating cotton candy and the curly haired boy insisting on trying and failing to win Finn a prize, until finally facing defeat. He won Poe a prize instead, first try, so the previous grumpiness faded in a matter of seconds. The butterflies threatened to burst his stomach the entire day.

Their first time, clumsy and awkward, teeth clanging in kisses and stupid buttons in Finn’s shirt being stuck and they laughed until they were out of breath. It was more perfect than anything either of them could’ve imagined.

He thinks about this, because neither of them were out before they got together.

This coming out thing? It scared the shit out of Finn. He was so lucky to have a supportive family, supportive friends. The school was a mixed experience, but he and Poe were in it together. His boyfriend tried to play it cool, but he knew how scared he was, too. He knows like the back of his hand, almost.

And this concern, it makes him feel so guilty he might vomit.

“I just… I was just wondering if you wanted to be official.”

“We are official, Finn.”

“No, I-I mean, public.”

He gulps around the growing lump in his throat. Poe goes scarily quiet.

This is also something they’ve talked about before. Fame is so new, it’s a whole new leap, learning how to handle all this, so it didn’t bother either of them to be secretive about their relationship, so to speak.

Their close network still knew, obviously, but the music industry, Hollywood, that’s way, way different than Finn’s newly established and growing network of artist connections and colleagues.

It wasn’t a problem. Until it was.

Coming out is personal. But ever since his boyfriend said he wanted to go public, then didn’t, as they were both on edge, then decided they should move in together and go public to slam down journalists linking Poe to a member of a girl group he met last summer, then didn’t.

It’s happened a couple of times. And finally, it seems, Finn is coming to terms with being tired of being ready and then backing out.

He’s terrified. Terrified of Poe being embarrassed of him, which he knows sounds crazy, also. But fuck.

“Baby, we’re gonna do it,” his boyfriend reassures him, but he’s distraught now, “You know we are. My agent just talks about my image, you know, I need to make sure-”

“Your image?”

That… that pisses Finn off. Conclusively. Because what the fuck?

“Phasma thinks we should do it at Christmas, season of love, you know?” Poe smiles shyly, he always loved the holidays. And he just doesn’t know how to react. “She’s fine with it, like, she didn’t ask me to fake being straight, like the guy I talked with before. Just-

“Are you embarrassed of me, Poe?” he finds the words slipping out before he can stop his mouth.

His boyfriend’s eyes widen significantly on the small screen, opens and closes his mouth several times, and there’s definitely a yell from somewhere in the studio, but Poe ignores it completely, “Of course not. Finn, I’m the luckiest guy in the world because of you. I just really… really think we need to time this right.”

“I,” Finn starts, but he’s barely sure where he’s going with the sentence. All he knows is that he’s scared Poe might tell him that all this time meant nothing to him. He doesn’t know why he leaps to that, but he does. His boyfriend might find something better than him in the limelight, “I know. You’ve told me, and I get it, I do. It’s just difficult being so far away from you, and then…”

He feels himself drifting off into a cloud of numbness and nothing, but Poe interrupts the sentence, “I thought you’d be more supportive of my career.” Finn nearly jumps. The words don’t sound cold, per say. But it’s weird. The good old butterflies flutter hesitantly, sort of in question.

“I am, darling, I-” he sighs again, “I’ve always been. You’ve just seemed like you’re ready, and I got the feeling that your agent didn’t want you to, and-” “Phasma wants it.”

“But on Christmas, Poe. This Christmas. I’m just scared you’re…” Finn shakes his head at himself, decides to be completely honest, because that’s how relationships work. Right? “Waiting for the moment to end this.”

“End this?” his boyfriend’s voice raises just an octave, looking perpetually confused. He also, admittedly, looks pissed. Hurt. “Do you want to break up with me?”

“No! Why would I-

“You’re the one who brought it up.”

Finn rubs his eyes, feels like they’re on goddamn fire. Poe’s biting his lips, rummaging around after moving what he assumes is a more private room than before, and avoiding eye contact. They shouldn’t be doing this on the phone. They shouldn’t be doing this at all.

He wishes his boyfriend was next to him, so he could curl up on his chest and sleep the entire weekend. It’s all he wants.

Ultimately, Finn makes the suggestion, “Baby, I’m sorry, I just… why don’t I call you next time you’re free? Or can you… are you getting back anytime soon?”

He doesn’t know how to describe this feeling, what’s happening, in any other way than it seems like Poe’s on a different planet than him, drifting in a meteor rain.

What Finn doesn’t expect least of all is his boyfriend’s answer, “Nah, you know, if you feel like that, we should take a break. A breather.”

And Poe smiles, but he sees through that bullshit. It doesn’t reach his eyes.

He’s trying to play it cool. Fuck. Why are Finn’s eyes stinging, now?

“A break?”

“Yeah.”

That’s so much to process. Fucking process it. The protests are bubbling under his skin, boiling and ice cold at the same time, but he doesn’t get the time when the yells on the end of the world resume.

“I really should go.” Poe tells him, but he doesn’t sound like he wants to.

“Poe…” he tries to breathe around the butterflies currently panicking inside of him. He’d scream at them to stop for just five seconds, if he could. His boyfriend’s already getting up from the seat, which is why Finn pinches the bridge of his nose and tries not to look at him, “Okay. Okay.”

The silence that settles between them, then, until they end the call in confusion and boiled up emotion, is far from the comfort they’ve been accustomed to. It ends without a goodbye. Without an I love you.

So, naturally, he gets absolutely zero sleep that night.

Whenever Rey told them they were being overdramatic, she was probably right. This is no exception.

Ever since the damnation of their FaceTime call, Finn tried to get into his head what went down. Namely, him and his boyfriend speaking over each other’s heads. It settles in the morning, the realisation that Poe assumed the worst of what he said, while he himself didn’t understand why he couldn’t come home . Just one day. Just to talk this out.

But in a recognizable stubborn fashion, his boyfriend ignored his calls and texts for the weekend. Finn tried so, so hard not to get pissed again. But also, Poe actively avoiding him made him want to cry. Not being able to just hear his voice made him want to cry.

Naturally, the following week, when his boyfriend decided to reach out, Finn became the one to ignore all forms of contact. It felt like they were walking in circles.

This is new and raw territory.

Finn and Poe don’t fight. It’s a basic law of the universe.

Which is why he doesn’t blame Rey for widening her eyes in shock at this new development. He also knows that she wants to intervene, badly so, given how protective she is of them, but because she’s lovely she always somehow knows when Finn needs his own space to think. Or scream into the void a little bit, whatever does the trick.

He’s pretty sure she didn’t expect this to go on for four months, now. He sure as hell didn’t expect it.

But… they’re both to blame. Finn’s pretty much dug himself a hole in the ground filling up with all his feelings, and as every week passes by, waits for his boyfriend to make the first move. He expects Poe to do the same. Nothing’s moving forward.

So, if Rey didn’t know him as she did, she’d ask him why.

Why don’t you just call him? He could. When his boyfriend stopped ignoring him, that is. Thing is, Finn’s world is sort of crumbling right now, and a confrontation with that isn’t something he can handle, he thinks.

It’s the thought of losing Poe for good. It’s the thought of Poe thinking Finn doesn’t want him anymore, when in fact he fears the exact opposite.

After watching that interview, though, he could breathe a little easier, he’ll admit.

And it’s weird. He felt inherently about a hundred times worse during it. The day after, he just kept thinking about Poe and his stupid curls and his nervous smile and what he might be doing while Finn was helping his sister with the dishes.

Maybe it’s knowing his boyfriend- ex-boyfriend (?) is okay. Does look more okay than himself.

It calms him. The next day, it makes Finn want to burn up all their polaroids and mail the ashes to the singers’ hotel in a massive envelope. As said before, this hole is deep, too deep, making it difficult to be rational.

A week after the interview, he’s just about on the edge to complete numbness.

Maybe he’s been reading those hilarious dumb gossip magazines whenever his boyfriend was on the cover. Shut up. If he acknowledges the ridiculousness of that, it’ll only make it worse.

Finn feels weak for being this torn up after a breakup… or break. He’s had breakups before Poe, but none of them hurt like this. Does it ever just fucking stop?

Apparently not, because when he picks up the phone with Rey’s name flashing, Finn expects it to be another question of what’s going on. How he’s doing, or not even a question, but an order to let her in as she’s probably already standing in front of his building carrying ice cream and bad horror movies.

He doesn’t get why she doesn’t just use the key he got her already, but it’s still endearing. Except, “Turn on the radio.”

“What?

“Finn, turn on your radio. Trust me.”

And so he scrambles around, the determination in her voice definitely not something to mess around with. Finn eventually uncovers it underneath the mountain of Poe’s vinyl records, and while his best friend doesn’t even tell him what station she’s referring to, he’s got a feeling about it. Also, it’s the first station that pops through the speakers when he turns it on, so.

Then, he has absolutely no idea what to listen for. The hosts are making some jokes about the song they’re gonna play next, thereozing about a “lost love” , and Finn’s about to ask until he realises Rey’s hung up on him, and a text.

just wait. u won’t regret it.

It’s too ominous for his best friend’s usual shenanigans. He’s a little worried.

But unlike the last hellish, unbelievable four months, Finn doesn’t have much time to worry, before the voices announce, “We present an exclusive live performance from our new favorite heartthrob, Poe Dameron!”

Oh God. Oh God, oh shit, oh my god.

Naturally, Finn’s anxiety kicks in like a punch in his gut.

In fact, he’s about to pull up his best friend’s contact again, sick of hearing the single that Poe wrote for him and not even being able to revel in the feeling anymore. Only it’s not ‘cardigan’.

Four months ago, a few days before they decided to take a break, his boyfriend sent him a couple of voice notes, containing lyrics and guitar pieces and other bits for the album he wanted Finn’s approval on. He always wanted his opinion first. It makes him all warm again.

This song, however, is brand new, unheard to everyone’s ears. Including Finn.

“I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit

Been saying "yes" instead of "no"

I thought I saw you at the bus stop, I didn't though

I hit the ground running each night

I hit the Sunday matinée

You know the greatest films of all time were never made”

The melody has the same calm like the other songs he’s heard, an image of fairytales and bare feet dancing in the woods and stars twinkling in the night.

The melancholy is unfamiliar, though.

“I guess you never know, never know

And if you wanted me, you really should've showed

And if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow

And it's alright now”

Finn’s thumb hovers over Rey’s contact name, but he can’t bring himself to move.

It’s the alright part. Except, despite how much he tries to lie to himself, he swears to everything god that his boyfriend’s voice breaks over the word. It’s subtle enough that the interviewers could pass it on as him being hoarse, he reasons, but Poe can’t fool him.

He wants him to be okay. Actually, no, because being okay means not missing Finn like Finn misses him, and that would hurt more than anything he can imagine. But also, he’s too far away for a reassuring hand. That’s why he wants him to be okay.

“But we were something, don't you think so?

Roaring twenties, tossing pennies in the pool

And if my wishes came true

It would've been you”

For some reason, it’s only then it settles into Finn’s mind.

Oh.

The song keeps going, and his emotions keep going, from the chaotic jumbled mess he’s become accustomed to a quiet buzz. He feels like his breathing’s slowed down, and a pocket in his heart is being emptied onto the floor.

Poe feels exactly the same way, he imagines. He has to.

Finn’s abandoned his phone somewhere unknown between the couch cushions, and he’s stuck staring at the empty wine bottle he hasn’t had the energy to get rid of, his microwave dinner half eaten, until his ex-boyfriend’s song comes to an end.

‘the 1’ is the title. He doesn’t know if he’s crying or not, which sounds a bit dumb in his own head.

“Poe Dameron!” one of the interviewers yells obnoxiously, clearly trying to hold in their excited giggling, “Those were quite emotional lyrics. I’m guessing there’s a story there somewhere?”

Finn could roll his eyes into the next century at that comment. Jesus Christ.

The singer’s complained about these kinds of people before, of course, he chuckles, politely, hesitantly, probably spinning the best way to avoid opening that door of vulnerability on open air, “I think everyone writes from their own experience, really.”

His voice has the same elegance and softness and gruff that makes Finn think of home, despite the tinny speakers and distraction that vibes off of him, all the way over in the states. It’s unbelievable.

The interview keeps going in the most standard way possible, a couple more questions Poe subtly circles around (including about dating, obviously), some jokes, and they eventually get to that segment where the listeners can call in and ask their own question to the dreamy man.

Some are boring, some are weird, some are intrusive, some are just teen voices in awe of his relatability and what not, mountains of flattery which his boyfriend is all too shy and starstruck to handle.

Finn bites his lip.

They repeat the number of the radio twice. The programme ends at nine. That means about forty five minutes of fan questions.

He shouldn’t. This is ridiculous. But what if… what?

Poe’s voice somehow carries his hand to fish the phone up again, though, like a strike of magic. And then the tone sounds, one, two, three, and it’s too late to take it back now. Shit.

“You’re live! Can our next lucky listener introduce yourself and your question?”

He tries so hard, desperately so, to swallow around the lump in his throat, seeming impossibly massive. The eerie silence is simply too painful to bear, though, so Finn squeezes his eyes shut hard for two seconds, before forcing the reply out.

“Yes, uh, hi. This is Finn Solo. From Pennsylvania.”

A beat. “Pennsylvania?! Well, honey, that’s actually Poe Dameron’s home state, isn’t it?”

Two beats. The singer clears his throat. “Yeah.” Clearly, he recognizes his voice in an instant. Well, obviously, he’d be shocked if he didn’t. Still, Finn feels like curling up in a ball and hiding from the world. He wonders if Rey’s listening, right now.

The interviewer seems unfazed from Poe’s hesitated answer, or they just choose to ignore it, he supposes. “The floor is yours, Finn. Ask ahead!”

So… how is he supposed to do this, again?

This is the worst idea Finn’s had in his entire life. Seriously. And he accepted Rey’s dare to swing all the way up and around the swingset in fifth grade, he’s well aware of what reckless looks like. This is it.

Still, he’s stuck now. Poe’s listening to him. Kind of forced to.

And against his own better judgement, Finn silences the million overthinking thoughts in his inner ear by simply saying whatever hits him first, “Did you mean what you said? In the song?”

Seconds feel like fucking hours right now.

“Sorry, can you-” one of the hosts start, but he feels moved to continue. “When did you write it?”

It’s low, the feedback of his boyfriend’s microphone can just be made out. He prays that was only comprehensible enough for Poe’s own ears, because Finn could never possibly live with himself if he outed the person he loves most in the world. Seems so, given the interviewer once again asks the singer in confusion.

“What do you say, Poe? Do you need, uh… for him to elaborate?”

“No.” the man says simply, shyness seemingly having faded away in a glimpse. “Finn, I wrote this back in May.”

Four months ago. Same month as their FaceTime call.

“Only a week after our call. Took me five hours. I needed to get every word just right.” Poe says those words so steadily it shocks Finn. His hand feels numb and itchy around the tiny device, and one of the hosts gasps.

“I-” he starts, but has no idea where to go, where to turn. Finn didn’t expect any of this tonight. A deep breath is needed, “Do you mean… you wrote it about me?”

He feels like an absolute idiot for asking, even doubting it, but given the emotional rollercoaster he’s been through up until now, he’s grasping for straws of confirmation. Poe chuckles, barely audible.

“All my songs are about you, darling.”

What the fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck. Another gasp is heard in the studio, a little louder this time, but he sends a silent thanks, still, to them being too taken aback to intervene.

Okay, these are definitely tears in Finn’s eyes, now.

One rolls down, cool against his hot cheek, and he almost wants to laugh widely, processing what’s happening over and over in his brain.

What’s mostly replaying is the nickname that he’s missed… too much.

If they were in the same room, in front of each other, alone , he could say and ask a million things. This conversation is impossibly too vulnerable for open air, but Finn really thinks, really, that this step was needed. At least, it’s something he’s been longing to hear.

Instead of breaking down in the happiness and sadness he’s feeling, instead of talking about the miscommunication they’ve been the victim of, he smiles. Can’t stop. It’s hurting his whole face, actually, but his chest feels endlessly lighter.

“If… uh,” Finn chuckles at himself again, him and his stupid emotions, probably laced obviously in his voice, “Is there a chance that you still want to write songs about me?”

Poe laughs back, warmer and wobblier than before. “Of course. Of-fucking-course. There’s no one else I’d rather write about.”

Those hosts over there are probably freaking out big time, but Finn can’t bring himself to care much.

They sigh rather in unison. Him and his boyfriend. Breathing shaky and yet steadying themselves, almost. Together.

“Okay. Okay. Thank fuck,” he finds himself sniffling, “Okay.”

“They’ll always be about you.”

21 notes · View notes

sasa-gay-yo · 3 years

Text

Just Us (Chapter Six: Knight)

← Chapter Five

“Elias, you need to put your hat over your ears or they’re going to freeze.” I pulled the little boy’s hat down more trying to convince him to keep it there.

“But I want to wear it like Jo Jo is,” he whined and pointed to the older boy standing next to him. Jonas was wearing a hat in a way that he said made his hair look good. He’d be better off just not wearing a hat if he didn’t care about his ears freezing.

“Tch.”

“Did you just tch me?” I stood up and tried to pull his hat down, too, but that was impossible because of our height difference. He stepped backwards and had to catch my wrist so I wouldn’t hit his face.

“Elias, don’t be like Jonas. Everything he does is because he wants girls to stare at him.” June laughed, knowing the secret she had spilled to me months ago and so did Elias. Jonas just glared at me for a bit and straightened out his coat. Elias grabbed my hand and pulled me to the town square. The festival was in full swing and I made the two children wait for me to close the store before we could go. He didn’t even want to open his presents before we left.

“Rules before we get there because I lied to your parents and told them you two were helping me and if I lose one of you it will be on my head. We use the buddy system. If you want to run off and do something, Elias, then you have to go with one of us.” He let go of my hand and grabbed Jonas’s.

“I pick Jo Jo.” Jonas groaned at his nickname and knew that he wasn’t going to pick up any girls with a kid attached to his hip. I didn’t care since he’d be out at the bars tonight when we take the kids home. He said it was his goal to have a girl in bed every year-end so he could start the year off right. Disgusting.

“You can stay with me then June.” She smiled up at me and we locked elbows, happy with how the straws were drawn. I knew she wouldn’t drag me along to every stall, but she could go to what she wanted since we liked the same things. That also means I wouldn’t have to spend my money on all the treats Elias wanted either. It was a great arrangement.

Once we got to the town square, Elias dragged Jonas to a toy shop and June and I kept walking. We both wanted to get a warm drink before our hands fell off. This year-end was definitely one of the coldest I’ve experienced.

“Eva, the Scouts are here too. Look, it’s the commander guy.” She pointed out Erwin who was talking to the head of the Trost Garrison in the center square. They were extra security for the influx of people coming in from Wall Maria. I really wanted to look around for Levi, but I knew he was going to be somewhere on the roof tops monitoring with his ODM gear.

“Isn’t that the boy you like, June?” I leaned down and pointed out a specific blonde haired boy who was with a few of his friends. They were at a game booth wasting their money to get a prize. She blushed when I pointed him out.

“Come on,” I pulled her over to the booth and had to work hard because she didn’t not want to go over at all. If anything, I wanted to help her, and I hope she knew that as I pulled out a few bills to play the game right next to them. She had a chance to talk to him that seemed organic. I was a perfect wingwoman.

“If you get three balls in, you can get one of these small prizes.” He handed them to me and I knew instantly that I was going to lose. I had bad aim and I knew the bucket didn’t have circular openings. Still, my determination to get June to talk to that boy was at an all time high. I’d take my time with this game to make it look like I was actually concentrating on it.

“June, hi!” I looked behind me and she had both hands behind her back, one toe drawing pictures in the dirt.

“Hi, Finn.” He smiled which made me feel like I had succeeded. Maybe it’d eat a few more notes so that she can talk longer.

I tossed the balls and completely missed two but hit the bucket on the last one. It didn’t go in, but at least there was a little hope. Damn, this game seems so simple, too. That may have added to the reasons I handed the man another bill. This time I’d have to throw it with more arc.

“Oh! Better luck next time! Do you want to play again?” He held out his hand and I couldn’t resist the urge to pull another bill out of my pocket and did it over again. This time when I made one ball in I shouted and made the other boys with Finn turn.

“Whoa! You actually got one in Miss!” I smirked down at them, accomplished. Getting pre-teen boys to compliment you was a feat and I was going to take it.

“Do you want to play ag-” He came from the back of the booth and we locked eyes. He wasn’t wearing a coat like the Scouts on the ground and this was the first time I had seen him in his full gear. How does he look so good with a hunk of metal attached to his sides?

Over the past week and a half, I had come to terms with my feelings for Levi like an adult should. Hours of pounding dough gets the annoyance of falling for someone like him out in no time. At first I was annoyed at myself because I knew that to get him to talk or even acknowledge any emotion was never going to happen. If he can’t tell me when he’s sad, how is he going to say he has feelings for me if he even has them. For the time being, I was okay with being quiet about how I felt because I didn’t want to ruin his almost daily visits to the café. Even yesterday, while my heart was literally beating out of my chest, he helped me make sourdough loaves for hours. Watching him kneed dough with his sleeves up, a concentrated look on his face, and hair tied back just did something to a girl.

So, even if I was being a big girl and dealing with my feelings, I was also nervous as hell to even let him know about it. A single slip and I have completely lost this game of pretend we had. If he knew, we couldn’t pretend anymore and I think that’s the whole reason he hangs around me in the first place.

“I couldn’t stand watching you lose over and over again, so I came to win.” I raised an eyebrow and was secretly satisfied he was watching me from above.

“It may look simple, but it’s hard. I usually have a good aim.” A lie. He rolled his sleeves up again and the shirt that he was wearing was a copy of one I had stolen from his bedroom dresser. He had so many because it was his uniform, that made sense. What didn’t make sense was that fact that in these freezing temperatures he was only wearing a cape.

“Give me one try.” He held his hand out to me and I just stared at it.

“Wow, Captain Levi! Are you going to play?!” The kids, including June, had crowded around us which definitely fueled Levi’s desire to win.

“Why are you holding your hand out? You have to pay to play.” I pointed to the vendor who was just staring at our interaction.

“Do you think I carry money on me while I’m doing a mission? I’ll repay you by winning.” I rolled my eyes and found his determination in front of the kids cute, so I obliged and paid to get him three more balls.

“Watch and learn, brats.”

With the kids staring, and no doubt some Scouts above, he stood behind the line and ever so easily threw the balls in one right after the other. It made me annoyed that he did it so flawlessly, but we were talking about Levi. The kids cheered around him, which definitely made his ego inflate even more, and when he was handed the stuffed rabbit, he took one glance at it before giving it to me with one arm.

“Repayment.” When the kids started asking him questions, he just walked away wordlessly and before he pressed whatever button it was to launch him back up on the buildings, I called out to him:

“When are you picking up the desserts?” He just turned his head around, not stopping his actions, and answered as he propelled off the ground.

“Nine.” He went flying through the air criss-crossing around buildings. He did look really cool doing that like it was nothing. I could see the blank look on his face as he advanced forward and finally found a roof to land on. I smiled at him, as if he could see me, and stuffed the rabbit under my arm.

“Miss Eva, you know Captain Levi?!” It was Finn who was asking and I couldn’t disappoint my girl.

“We’re friends. He comes to my café sometimes, so you might see him again. June knows when he comes, you can come with her.” They looked at June and she blushed at their stares. I looked up at Levi, but his back was turned to look at another half of the festival. Standing on that roof, he did give off Humanity’s Strongest vibes.

“We’ll see you boys later. June and I want to get something to drink.” She put her arm in mine again, probably glad that her anxiety ridden interaction was over with Finn, and we walked off.

“That was cool of Mister Captain Levi. He even won you the rabbit.” She pointed to it and I nodded. And I was keeping the damn thing if he ever asked for it back to be petty.

“I’ll name it Levi, how ‘bout it?” She nodded in agreement and we met up with Jonas and a candy-filled, bouncing Elias.

The festival went on like that, us as a group and then using the buddy system. We played a few more games and Jonas won Elias a spinning top. June had gotten a mug with her warm cider and gushed to Jonas all about how Mister Captain Levi had come down from the skies to win the game for me. She even pointed out Levi, the rabbit, which got Jonas fuming. He claimed that if he was there, he’d win the game easily too. Elias had to remind him it took seven tries to get the spinning top and that sent the boy running back to the café, a lollipop in his mouth. At least he’d be tired out for his parents.

“Now, you three, here are your gifts. June, Elias, and Jonas. Open up.” I made sure mine was last to open. Elias and June came together and made Jonas and I both homemade snow globes with our initials in them. Jonas had gotten me a new recipe book and the kids both books, to which Elias had to really work to fake his happiness about it. It was a good laugh for Jonas and I as we asked him question after question about him liking the book. However, I was happy with myself knowing I took first place over Jonas, because last year I had lost to a red ball.

“Oh, thank you Miss Eva! It’s so pretty!” She held up the dress to her body and spun around. Jonas was the next to react when he saw the hair gel I had gotten him to pull off those ridiculous hairstyles he liked so much. Lastly, I looked over to Elias who was staring down with large eyes at his toy. He was the reaction I was anticipating the most. I had to tell Levi if he made the eight-year-old’s dream come true.

“June, look!” He held up the horse, his eyes still wide. While she had no interest in toys, she still admired it.

“That’s really cool, Elias.” He held up the soldier next, his arm stretched as high as it went.

“And there’s a matching Scout, too!” Jonas and I both looked at each other confused, knowing there was nothing on that soldier to indicate it was a Scout or even in the Royal Military. It had to be because the only soldiers he constantly sees on horses are the Scouts. To me, it wasn’t that bad that his new favorite toy was turning into a Scout. Maybe I should tell him a Scout bought it for him, too.

“Miss Eva, I like it so so so so so sooooooooooooooooooooo much!” He put the box on the floor and ran over to hug my leg that was dangling off the counter. My heart filled and I patted his head, leaning down with one arm to hug him. Levi would like his reaction, especially the Scout part. I think Jonas was a bit annoyed at Elias’s playing, so he looked at the clock and announced it was time for the kids to go home. I had to stay here to hand out late orders, so I ushered them out.

“I’ll see you all tomorrow! Don’t stay up all night reading, Elias!” He stuck his tongue out at me and I did it back. Both kids walked ahead of Jonas who stayed back at the door.

“Thank you for your gift, Ev.” I smiled back.

“You, too, Jonas. You’ll be the first one to try out something I make from the recipe book.”

“Can I suggest the cinnamon rolls?” I nodded and insured him I’d make them for him on Monday. He still stood there watching the kids walk their way down the street. He wasn’t going to..?

“Is there anything going on with you and Levi?” I almost choked on the air. Gods, I wish.

“No, Jonas. He just comes in for tea after an expedition.” That didn’t satisfy him.

“And takes you to the capital, and helps you make bread, and wins a game for you at the festival.” He sounded like a child having a temper tantrum.

“There’s nothing going on between us, Jonas. We’re just budding friends and I make things for the Scouts from time to time.” He narrowed his eyes and pointed to the box on my counter. This astounding common sense was getting annoying.

“Then who’s that gift for?” I had to come up with some lie quickly. If I told him it was for Levi, he’d never leave.

“The candy shop owner. He gives out so much free candy to those two on my request, I felt I needed to get him something.” He lowered his gaze and kicked a rock.

“I’d never think you’d lie to me like that, Ev.” My heart caught in my throat. That made me feel like shit. Especially since Levi was probably going to propel down from one of these buildings in a few minutes.

“The kids are going to get home before you can get to them. You should go.” He looked up at me and gave me one of the most heart wrenching looks. Ouch.

“I still like you… from that one time I told you when we were drunk. That wasn’t a lie. I’ll believe you for now… but I don’t think you’re telling the truth.” I was telling him the truth though. I left some things out, but there wasn’t anything between Levi and I. Did it frustrate me that there wasn’t anything? Yes. But I still wasn’t lying to Jonas. And now this unwarranted confession was making things worse. If Levi wasn’t here, Jonas wouldn’t have said anything and it wouldn’t be awkward between us now. I could live with knowing it from June, but now that he told me, it changed everything. I didn’t want that.

“I hope nothing changes, Jonas. I like babysitting the kids with you and talking to you when you come in to deliver things. Even if we do stay friends in the long run, I-” He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked up at the kids who had stopped walking when they noticed he never started.

“Friends friends or Levi friends?” This time I glared at him a bit, but he wasn’t looking at me. I knew if he stayed any longer, we’d get in a fight, and he’d get more disappointed if Levi decided to drop in in the middle of it. It was better to send him off now and fix it later.

“Goodnight Jonas. Happy year-end.” He just nodded once and took off after the kids. No goodnight, no year-end joke. I hoped I didn’t have to wake up to someone dragging him to my café drunk like last year.

Oh.

When he was drunk last year. That’s when he told me. He was making a tradition of it. He had just thrown up on the sidewalk when the people carrying couldn’t put him through the door and I was wiping the sweat off his forehead.

I closed the door, making sure it wasn’t locked, and went to sit back on the front countertop. Swinging my legs, I replayed the conversation in my head.

“Ev, you’re so good to me,” he slurred.

“Well, Jonas, you’re drunk on my doorstep. I can’t just leave you here.” He smiled and looked like he was going to throw up again. I backed up, but kept the wet rag on his forehead.

“When you’re done throwing up, you can come upstairs and I’ll give you some water.” He burped and I grimaced. Wasn’t he supposed to be having sex at his house with some random bar girl? Why was he so drunk and here?

“I’ll like that. Your couch is comfy.” I laughed a bit.

“Why are you so drunk? I thought you had a tradition of taking someone home.” He shook his head really fast, which was a horrible decision, and held it in both of his hands to try and stop the dizziness.

“I don’t want to bring anyone home but you,” He pointed to me and I gave him a confused look. He smelled so much of alcohol.

“I come to your house sometimes to pick up orders, Jonas.”

“No, no, no, no, no. Like. I want you to come so I can kiss you.” He turned over his left shoulder and threw up again. I patted his back and just nodded. Very, very drunk.

“Can I get my pastries or do I need to wait for you to stop daydreaming?” I jumped and looked at the uniform clad man in front of me. He didn’t even knock.

“Oh, sorry. They’re cooling right now. I baked them in the last hour.” I also timed it just right so that he’d have to stay a few minutes and open his present, but he didn’t need to know that. I just sat there and drank in his uniformed look. It was much better than his usual black slacks.

“Is that the cape I wore?” He grabbed a chair and sat down right in front of me, back of the chair leaning on the table. He assumed his lounging position.

“Yes, you also left it crumpled on the floor. Don’t think I didn’t notice you stole one of my shirts, too. I woke you up, didn’t I?” He rather rudely ripped the covers off of me and kicked the bedpost three times, yes I do recall. It really ruined the ruse of the dream I had of him that night.

“Do you want it back? I’m sure the other fifteen are missing it.” He squinted his eyes.

“I’ll have you know if anyone finds out a civilian has my issued military gear with them, I’d get in trouble.” Oh, so we weren’t pretending right now.

“The military counts your clothes?” He sighed and switched his lounging leg. I looked to the side at the medium sized box wrapped in red fabric. I guess it was now or never.

“I have your gift,” I picked up the box and hopped off the counter. He stared at it for a few seconds before taking it and just sitting it on his lap. Was he not… ?Does he not know… ?

“Open it,” I waved my hand at the gift and he hesitated.

“I want to give you my gift first.” That really set the butterflies off in my stomach. The stoic, mean, scary Captain Levi actually got me a gift like he said and it wasn’t a lie to go to the capital with me? I was buzzing with warmth. I closed my eyes and held my hands out.

“What are you doing?” I could tell he didn’t move. Does he really not know how gifting works?

“My gift, Captain.” I wriggled my fingers.

“Oh, yeah.” This time he moved and I felt him place a circle in my hands. It felt similar to the shape of Jonas’s hair gel. He didn’t get me hair gel, did he? I felt it with my eyes closed again, taking a good guess.

“Is it… candies?” He groaned like this was taking too long.

“Just open your eyes, I don’t have all night.” I opened them and looked down at the jar in my hands. It was quite thoughtful of him and a very practical gift. It made my heart sing and I couldn’t hide my smile.

“S-some... Scout, he, um, he recommended it after I asked how to get rid of dry skin. They said this was the only thing that worked for them. A-And I know you’ve been looking for something… So…” I opened it right away and put it on my hands. Wow, this felt really smooth and it smelled like roses, “D-Do... you like it?” That statement made his voice raise up a bit. He didn’t want me to know that he definitely wanted to feel good about his gift.

“I love it, thank you, Levi. If it really does get rid of the cracks in my skin, you’ll have to thank that Scout too. Now open yours!” I waved my hands again, rushing him as I stood in front of him. He slowly undid the tie that held the fabric on the wooden box and it was almost like he was looking at a bomb when he went to open it. Slow and controlled. Did he think I would buy him something that popped out at him?

When he opened it all the way, he just stared. This made my smile drop. Great. Who was I to expect a big reaction out of this man? He could be screaming in his head right now and I would never know.

He picked it up out of the box and ran his hand along the simple blue design. When he looked up at me, there was just a little shred of emotion in his eyes, I’m sure I saw it. Something that wasn’t indifference. It just wasn’t there long enough for me to get a real good look at it. I just wanted him to say something so I didn’t have to prompt him into a lie. He took out the cup next and did the same thing, inspecting the design and the porcelain.

“How much did you pay for this?” Well, that was an annoying first reaction. No “thanks, Eva” or anything.

“It doesn’t matter. I saw it and thought about you. You probably have a lot of tea kettles and cups at HQ, but I guess if you ever get peppermint tea you can use-”

“I… I like it. I like it a lot actually. I only have one set at the HQ and it’s from the Underground. This one is… much better.” That was good enough for me. It brought my smile back and I clasped my hands together. I think I was more excited than he was about the gift.

I clapped my hands and he looked up at me again. There it was that same shred of some type of Levi emotion that I couldn’t put my finger on.

“Well, I think the desserts are cool if you want to take them.” I turned around to go and put the Scout’s treats in a nice paper box but he grabbed my wrist. I swear I made a noise out loud which was me reacting to Levi touching me for one of the first times. Damn, how did I hide this a few months ago? And if he came up to my apartment later, how was I going to handle that? In all of his visits the past week, he always had to get back to HQ, but I knew that after his security detail wasn’t needed, he would come to the café and stay one night. What was I going to do then?

“Can you make me tea?” I slowly looked up from his grasp on my wrist and smiled at him.

“What about your party?” It’s not that I wanted him to leave, it’s just if he kept looking at me with those eyes I was in trouble.

“They can wait. Dessert isn’t till they’ve all drank themselves to death.” He’s a hard bargainer, I guess he has to stay for at least a cup.

“Okay,” I took the tea set from him and set it up on the stove. I pulled out a cup for myself too as the set only had one. He didn’t say anything as I made the peppermint tea, he just watched me from his chair. The stare this time was almost overwhelming. I had just given him a gift, he liked it, and he asked me to make tea with it. There also had to be something said for him not caring enough about the officer party to stay here. I most definitely kept my back to him so he couldn’t see the harsh red that painted my face. It didn’t help that I could feel his stare from behind me.

“Do you not drink much?” I broke to silence because I was going to go crazy or have a heart attack. He shifted behind me.

“I drink, just not with people I don’t like. The Garrison Officers are also attending.” I nodded and noted the one Captain who comes to my café on his morning shifts. I wouldn’t want to drink with them too.

“I don’t blame you. They come in here sometimes. Loud.” He hummed in agreement and I just watched the tea brew. It felt like these minutes were taking hours.

“Why do you ask? You want to drink with me?” I finally turned around and put my hands up; the same way I did when we had the bed misunderstanding.

“I didn’t mean it like that. I was just asking that’s all. I-I mean I’m not against it, if you’re asking just in general. I drink too. Not a lot because I’m working, but I can if I want to, yeah.” I turned back around and cursed at myself. Great at hiding that. Now Levi was gaining points in my game.

“Sure, I’ll drink with you sometime. I can probably drink you under the table.” Man, everything had to be a contest. Such a competitive boy. I finally gained composure to turn around and join him and the table with the tea. Thank gods I closed the front windows.

“I don’t know. I can outdrink Jonas on a good day.” He rolled his eyes and took his first sip out of the new cup. It looked like it fit his weird grip well.

“I’m sure anyone can outdrink that idiot.”

“You don’t even know him and you’re calling him an idiot. In fact, he has great common sense.” He smirked and took another sip, probably to stifle some insult he had lined up.

“Usually when they say you have common sense, they mean you’re an idiot.” Nope, it was not stifled. It was just simmering. I couldn’t disagree with that statement.

“Did you enjoy the festival?” He shrugged and switched legs again.

“I was having an okay time watching from above when I saw this one girl losing terribly. I had to go save her from that fate.” Levi, the bunny, was still sitting on the counter too.

“What a damsel in distress! I’m sure she’s glad you saved her from the judgement of prepubescent boys. You even got them wanting to come to the café.” He tched again.

“Why were you with them anyways? The girl looked uncomfortable.” I set my cup down on the table and rested my elbow on the table.

“That girl’s name is June and she likes one of the boys in that group. I was just teasing her. You helped her cause too because I told the boys to ask her when you came to my café. You might have them at your ankles the next time you come.” He groaned and put his cup down too. It was still half full, which meant he wasn’t leaving yet.

“So you get a stuffed animal and I get a bunch of brats at my neck. That’s how the damsel in distress thanks her knight.” Maybe he didn’t mean it, but when he said her knight, as in possessive, I read into it a bit too much. I’m sure he meant nothing by it.

“Well I gave you the tea set so it evens out.” He shook his head, tapping the table.

“No, you got the tea set before you even knew about this game. You can’t opt out.”

“Hey, hey, hey who paid for you to even play that game to begin with? Me.” He shook his head again, adamant about his equal exchange.

“Exactly. You paid, I gave the rodent. You gave those brats my location, I’ve gotten nothing in return.” It was my turn to tch him as I leaned more forward, head resting in my hands. He did the same, but just one elbow and he wasn’t sitting crisscrossed.

“They aren’t brats, they’re kids.”

“Same thing.” I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Arguing with him was so fun to do. It was a weird thing to like, but it was fun. It wasn’t arguing, but bickering. Maybe it would seem annoying to the people around us, but trying to prove Levi wrong, the person who thinks he’s always right, was a feat I was happy to take on.

“Are you falling asleep on me?” I shook my head, eyes still closed.

“Just thinking.”

“About what?” You.

I took another deep breath trying to silence my heart. My eyes snapped open.

“Cedar.” That was the third one. Mint tea, lemon soap, and cedar. I had gotten close enough to him to figure it out. It had to be the countless ODM trainings in the trees.

“You’re thinking about trees?” It was the way his breath hit my face that I knew he was close. I didn’t want to look over and lock eyes with him because I knew if I did the heart that I worked so hard to silence would start up again. No, Levi, I’m thinking about you, but I just can’t come out and tell you that.

“Yeah.” He huffed, air again hitting my face, and I just stayed looking at the tea set. This time, I was even nervous to look at him. Not a lot of things flew past Levi, so if he saw how I reacted to our closeness he would think something was up. I wasn’t ready to give this up yet… or was I?

I mean I said that I sorted out my feelings. And if I was going to not act like a schoolgirl, like I had promised myself, then I could look at him and not get starstruck or anything. What was any different from a few months ago to now? He’s been in my house multiple times and I’ve slept a few feet away. What was the point of being meek about it? Yeah, I was going to do it.

When I looked at him, he had his eyes closed. Damn, there goes that pep talk. It was like he was sleeping. Peaceful. No harsh lines. Everything was calm and serene for him. He looked so handsome just sitting here like that. The moonlight casting down on his face from the side window didn’t help my feelings. Nor did the fact that he was staying here with me and not with the officers. Or the fact that he had swoop down and been my knight at the festival… This man was trying to kill me.

I leaned in. Apparently, we had lost all self control in those few moments looking at him, but, come on, how was I supposed to control myself when he was looking like that? I didn’t know what I was even doing kissing him like that because I knew he wouldn’t react any other way than he did. I set myself up for failure.

His lips were soft and tasted like tea and I only got to kiss them for maybe two or three seconds before he realized what was going on. He didn’t kiss back and I think he just opened his eyes, studied the situation, and sat back when he realized. I didn’t look up at him after. I just closed my eyes and positioned my head to the ground. Him pulling away like that was telling enough. I’d lost and ruined the game we were playing. There was no way to pretend now and Levi only wanted to pretend. Nevermind my racing heart.

“D-Do, um, do you have the, um, what are they called? The pastries? For the party?” His voice was low and I swore at myself that I didn’t just give them to him before and let him go. He was the one who asked for tea.

“Yeah.” It was breathy and I didn’t look at him when I stood up and went to put the turnovers in the paper box. I even labeled it To the Officers of the Scouts. Now I felt so stupid in doing that. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

I shouldn’t have kissed him.

I handed it to him and he didn’t say anything. The door closed, signaling that he was gone. I let out a long groan and sank down behind the counter hoping I could hide from everything. The chairs and the tables saw it. They were laughing at me. I really thought I could kiss Captain Levi and get away with it. The man who doesn’t even know what emotions were was going to sort them out in time to kiss me back? No.

I guess it was six months. That’s how long it took till the Captain didn’t come back.

Chapter Seven→

Chapter Masterlist

A double update for you all :) What do you think’s going to happen to them? Hehe.

#levi ackerman #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman x oc #levi x reader #snk levi #levi attack on titan #levi x oc #aot #aot levi #snk #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyoujin levi #levi heichou #captain levi #original character

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thebrotherssalvatore321 · 3 years

Text

Keeping Secrets Ch. 53

Keeping Secrets Masterlist

Katie laid in bed on her side, her eyes taking in Klaus who was sleeping on his side facing her. His lips were parted as slow quiet breaths slipped between them and his eyes were closed, but Katie could see them moving around behind his eyelids. When his brow creased she thought he might be having a nightmare. So in an attempt to soothe him she slipped her fingertips over his creased forehead and down the bridge of his nose. She was pulling her hand back when he jerked awake. For a split second the look in his blue eyes suggested he’d forgotten where he was, but as he fully woke up and saw her he relaxed. “Bad dream?” she asked quietly. He hummed a positive answer. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.” he shook his head and turned onto his back then held his arm out for her. So she scooted over and laid her head on his shoulder. He started playing with her hair enjoying the silence. “How high do you think the chances are of us spending the whole day together uninterrupted?”

“Not very if I’m being honest.” She answered. “At some point we’re going to have to deal with the fallout of last night’s attack.” Katie pointed out. “And my stomach has been growling for the past thirty minutes. I’m surprised that’s not what woke you up.”

“If you’re hungry, why haven’t you eaten yet?” he asked curiously.

“I was afraid you would wake up if I left the bed.” she answered with a look up at him.

Klaus heaved out a breath, not liking that she was going hungry for his sake, as he turned over to grab his phone off the bedside table. He called the kitchen maid and told him what to bring up for breakfast. “There, problem solved.”

“I forget there are people here being paid to wait on us hand and foot.” She sighed as he wrapped his arm back around her and resumed playing with her hair.

“You should utilize it more often.” He told her with a look down at her stomach.

“I’ll try, but it’s hard to get used to having people wait on me when a little over two years ago I was the one waiting on people for what little tips they decided to leave me.” she said as she looked down at his hand on her belly. “How does your little princess sound this morning?” she asked, missing the time when she could hear her child’s heartbeat.

“Healthy as ever.” He answered with a small smile. “Have you thought any more about a name for this little one?”

“I still can’t come up with a first name, but I have a middle name in mind.” She admitted.

“Are you going to keep me guessing or are you going to share it with me?” he asked with a bit of a smirk.

“Dorothy.” Katie answered.

“Like ‘The Wizard of Oz’?” Klaus asked. “You were named after a ‘Gone With The Wind’ character so you want to name our child after another iconic heroine?”

“No.” Katie laughed. “After my mother, Dorothea.”

“Your first mother or your second?” he asked curiously.

“Second.” Katie answered. “I wouldn’t name a dung beetle after my first mother, much less our child.”

“You don’t talk about your first mother much.” Klaus commented as he turned onto his side so he could see her face better.

“There’s not much to say.” Katie shrugged and Klaus gave her a look that told her he wanted to know more about her past, things she hadn’t written about in the journals he’d read. “She was…cold. My sister and I…we were just a wifely duty and one she considered a failure because we weren’t boys who could carry on the Easton name.” Katie answered, earning a frown from Klaus. “Not once did I ever see a glimmer of love in that woman’s eyes. Not even for my sister.”

“What do you mean, not even for your sister?” Klaus asked, noticing the distant look her eyes took on while talking about her first life.

“She was the golden child. Poised, polite, obedient, beautiful like our mother…everything our father could have asked for in a girl, but she was still a girl. So…” Katie shrugged suggesting that even perfection could save them from their father’s hatred. “I on the other hand looked like a feminine copy of my father with a smart mouth and a defiant attitude.”

“Well, I happen to like your smart mouth and your sister sounds like the perfect match for Finn” He told her as he leaned in and caught her lips with his in a short kiss. “And I like Dorothy.”

TVDTVDTVD

Katie was sitting in the kitchen finishing up her lunch when Klaus found her. “Are you feeling up to a visit to the church?” he asked as he slipped his hand over her shoulders and she looked up at his worried face.

“Sure, what’s up?” she asked as she pushed her empty plate away.

“Marcel contacted me. Father Kieran isn’t doing well and Marcel is worried about Cami. He would go check on her himself, but-”

“But he’s been banned from the quarter.” She finished as she hopped down off the stool. “Let me grab my bag and I’ll meet you in the courtyard.”

TVDTVDTVD

Josh, Cami and a doctor stood around Father Kieran who was restrained in a chair. Josh was putting a gag into Kieran's mouth. “Well, isn’t this a gruesome little scene?” Klaus asked, announcing their presence.

Cami turned to them with wide eyes. “Klaus, Katie, what are you doing here?”

“I received an urgent call on your behalf.” Klaus answered. “It seems we’ve been tasked with doing what your coward of a boyfriend could not.” Klaus and Katie walked further into the attic that used to be Davina’s room. “Which, by the looks of things, is dissuading you from whatever madness it is you’re about to attempt.”

“ECT?” Katie asked with a look at the machine sitting behind Father Kieran’s chair. “Is he really that far gone that you have to resort to shock therapy?”

Cami ignored her and turned to the doctor in the room. “Are you ready?”

“Please.” The doctor replied, “I’m begging you, don’t force me to do this.”

“Fine. I’ll do it myself.” Cami said as she walked around him, grabbed the electrodes and dipped them in clear gel. Katie looked up at Klaus afraid of what she was about to see done to an innocent man like Father Kieran.

Klaus slipped his arm around Katie’s waist and pulled her into his side. “Camille, your uncle is a good man. He shouldn’t suffer.” He reasoned.

“He’s been suffering for weeks.” Cami argued. “He’s dying, Klaus. This might be the only chance he’s got.” She put the electrodes to her uncle’s temples causing him to yell in pain. Katie flinched and bit her lips closed, hating seeing the man in pain.

When Cami pulled the electrodes away, Klaus left her side to take the electrodes from Cami who moved to her uncle’s side. Kieran sniffled and looked at Cami, seeming to be lucid for a second as he said her name, but soon after his face changed to hateful and glaring, “What the hell did you do to me?”

“We have to do it again.” Cami moved back behind Kieran’s chair.

“Whoa, are you serious?” Josh asked.

“That was something coherent. It’s working.” Cami put her hand on the electrodes, but Klaus put his hand on hers stopping her.

“Doctor,” Klaus started, “See to your patient.” The doctor clicked a pen light on and shined it in Kieran’s eyes. The machine tracking Father Kieran’s vitals was beeping rapidly and irregularly.

“His heartbeat is irregular. We can’t keep this up. It’ll kill him.” The doctor informed them all.

“No!” Cami tried to take a step toward her uncle, but Klaus stepped in the way.

“Cami, we need to have a word, in private.” Klaus then walked over to Katie and leaned down to whisper in her ear. “You and Joshua get the doctor and his machine out of here.” Katie gave him a nod then waited for him and Cami to be out of ear shot.

Katie unplugged the ECT machine and handed it to the doctor. “Josh, do your thing.” she said with a jerk of her head to the doctor. “He needs to get out of here before things get too bad.”

Josh nodded and ushered the doctor out of the attic. While they were gone Katie stood by the door to the attic waiting for Klaus and Cami to come back. Kieran stared at her for a few seconds before he looked to the side as if someone were talking to him. Then out of nowhere he growled and bit his thumb off, pulling it from the restraint as he lunged at her. She yelped and stumbled back out of the doorway only for father Kieran to slam into an invisible wall. Someone had put a boundary spell on the attic.

Having heard her yelp Klaus whooshed up to her only to see that she was safe and Father K. was beating on the invisible wall with a thumbless hand, his other one was still attached to the chair behind him. A few minutes later Josh came back to see what had happened. The two vampires got Kieran on the bed and restrained him while Katie grabbed the sedative left behind by the doctor and drew up the appropriate amount for a man his size.

Only after he was sedated did Katie pull a chair up beside the bed and start working on bandaging the priest’s hand. She was almost done when Klaus’s phone started ringing. He answered it, had a short conversation with the person on the other end then hung up. “What’s wrong?” Katie asked, noticing the frown on his face.

“Someone bombed the bayou.” He answered.

“Should you go do something about it?” Katie asked with wide eyes.

“No, we’re needed here. Elijah can handle the bayou bombing.” He answered with a shake of his head then called Elijah.

Katie, Klaus and Cami were standing around Father Kieran’s bed when the machine flat lined and he started fighting to breathe. “He’s in cardiac arrest.” Katie announced with a look at the monitor.

“You might want to look away.” Klaus told Cami before he plunged his fist into the priest’s chest.

“What are you doing?!” Cami asked, shocked by what Klaus had just done.

“Massaging his heart.” Klaus answered and the monitor started beeping again. “His body is shutting down. Even with my help he doesn’t have much time.”

“Your blood.” Cami said, desperately looking for a way to save her only family. “If you fed him your blood, he’d wake back up, right?”

“As a vampire in transition, yes.” Klaus answered with a look at Katie who stood on the other side of the bed watching him massage Kieran’s heart. “As for the hex,” he shook his head and looked at Cami over his shoulder, “perhaps his death will be a mercy.”

Tears slipped down Cami’s cheeks. “Do it.” her eyes slipped closed and she shook her head. “Just do it. Please, Klaus, I can’t let him die, not like this.”

Klaus looked at Katie for her opinion and she nodded her head. So he bit his wrist, placed it to the priest’s lips then took his hand from his chest and let his heart stop beating.

TVDTVDTVD

Katie and Klaus sat on a pew in the sanctuary while Cami lit a candle for her uncle. “Why did you agree with turning him?” Klaus asked quietly.

“Because the chances of the priest actually wanting to become a vampire are incredibly low, he won’t turn. He will still die, but if becoming a transitioning vampire will break the hex then they will have the chance to say goodbye and Cami will get the closure that she didn’t have the opportunity too with her brother.” She answered. “It was the only way to make things even close to right in this screwed up situation.”

Klaus kissed her then stood and went to Cami and told her Kieran should be waking up soon. So they all went up to the attic to be there when he woke.

Katie and Klaus stood at the foot of his bed while Cami sat beside him. Cami jumped a little when Kieran sat straight up then looked at her. “Cami, what happened?” he asked with a look at her then Katie and Klaus before he spun around and put his feet on the floor. “The hex…I could feel it like a living thing inside of me.” he looked at his hand to see that the x between his thumb and index finger was gone. “It’s gone.” Cami engulfed her uncle in a hug with tears in her eyes. When he hugged her back he saw his bandaged hand and missing thumb. “Oh my god.”

“Yes, you’ve had a trying day, Father.” Klaus said as he tucked his hands behind his back. Kieran looked around with an odd look on his face, probably realizing he didn’t feel normal. “How best to break it to you? It appears the hex was broken by your death.”

“Back up.” Kieran said, then looked at Klaus and Katie out of the corners of his eyes. “I died? For how long?”

“A few hours or so.” Katie answered.

“I’m sorry.” Cami told him with tears slipping down her cheeks. “I just couldn’t lose you, not like that. I made him give you his blood.”

“I see.” Kieran sighed. “So the devil has a deal for me after all.”

“Actually, you could still go where you’re supposed to.” Katie spoke up not wanting him to think he was damned to hell just because he’d died with vampire blood in his system.

“What do you mean?” Klaus asked, wondering what she was talking about.

Katie looked up at Klaus, “Your mother told Elena that even though you turned Jenna her soul remained pure. So she didn’t get trapped on the other side like most supernatural creatures.” She looked at Kieran, “She passed on and found peace and I believe it would be no different for you. I’m sure you know that if you don’t feed you’ll die, but Jenna fed and still remained pure, so if you want to have more time to-”

“Katie,” the priest interrupted as politely as he could, “I appreciate the options you're trying to give me, but I do not want to transition.” Kieran looked up at Cami who wiped a tear on her face. “Please leave me with my niece. I’d like a private moment to talk with her.”

When Klaus and Katie didn’t move, afraid to leave Cami alone with him Cami moved to Klaus and placed her hand on his upper arm. “It’s okay. Thank you for today, both of you, for being kind.” Katie wanted to say she didn’t do anything, but thought better of it and just gave her a small smile and a nod of her head. They both headed down stairs.

“I think I know who was behind the attack on the bayou.” Klaus told her as they came to a stop in the middle of the isle of the sanctuary.

“Really, who?” Katie asked with a frown.

“I think Genevieve has figured us out and she is taking it out on us by attempting to foil our peace with the wolves.” He told her and she nodded. “I need to go speak with her.”

“I’ll stay here.” Katie told him, making him sigh and give her a look that told her he wished she would let him take her home. “Cami doesn’t need to be alone right now and Father Kieran is better. I’ll be okay.”

“Call Nate. I don’t want either of you here alone with him.” He told her then leaned down and kissed her then left her behind.

TVDTVDTVD

Katie was sitting on a pew at the front of the sanctuary, waiting on Nate, while Cami sat in the upper balcony, taking a moment for herself when Katie heard Cami ask, “Have you changed your mind?” Katie looked behind her to see that Kieran had left the attic. Not a minute later Cami yelped then jumped over the balcony railing.

“Shit.” Katie cursed as she took her bag off of her shoulder, grabbed a vervain grenade then tossed the bag to the side. Kieran whooshed downstairs grabbed Cami and threw her into a pew, breaking it. Katie yelped and hid behind the pew she had been sitting on. When she saw Kieran pull Cami past her to the front of the sanctuary then grab her hair and make her stand on her knees, Cami saw Katie. Kieran was too occupied, listening to the voices in his head, people he saw that they didn’t, to see Katie mouth, “Cover your face.” and shield her own with her arm. When Cami’s face was shielded Katie pulled the pin on the vervain grenade in her hand then threw it at Kieran. When it wet off he screamed out in pain and let go of Cami’s hair. Katie ran to Cami. “We have to run, now.” Katie helped her to her feet and they were almost to the front doors when Kieran whooshed in front of them, his eyes red and framed by veins.

But before he could hurt them, his neck was broken. As he fell to the side, Nate came into view. Before Katie could say anything Cami went limp against her. “Whoa, hey.” Nate said as he stepped up and took the dead weight off of Katie. He was laying Cami on the floor when Klaus whooshed in, stopping when he saw Kieran passed out on the floor.

“What happened?” Klaus asked as he walked around Kieran to Katie, his eyes scanning her for any injury.

“Kieran’s hex came back.” Katie answered feeling a little faint herself as the adrenaline that has been coursing through her since Cami jumped off the balcony backed off. “He tried to kill us, but Nate whooshed in and broke his neck before he could.”

Klaus looked at Nate, “You know, I was wary of you at first.” Klaus told him as he wrapped his arm around Katie’s waist.

“What, have I finally gotten on your very short list of trusted people?” Nate asked as he stood up.

“No, however you do have my gratitude.” Klaus told him with a half smirk.

Katie smiled and shook her head at Klaus. “Okay, so what do we do about Father Crazy Pants?” she asked as she turned around looking at the still passed out priest. “He was dangerous enough when he was human.”

Klaus walked over to the broken pew and grabbed a sharp piece of wood. “I think there’s only one thing we can do, what both of them would have wanted.” Klaus kneeled down and drove the stake into Father Kieran’s heart causing veins to rise to the surface of his skin that turned grayish purple.

Katie stayed with Nate and the still passed out Cami while Klaus carried Father K. up to the attic and placed him on the bed so he wouldn’t be the first thing seen when someone entered the church. “Father Crazy Pants?” Nate asked with a serious look at her. “That was a little disrespectful don’t you think?”

“Yeah…I didn’t mean for it to be. It was an attempt to lighten the mood that failed.” Katie explained and Nate just smirked and rolled his eyes at her.

When Klaus came back, Nate left then Klaus scooped Cami up in his arms and they brought her home. Klaus laid her in her bed then they sat in her living room waiting for her to wake up. “I was wrong about Genevieve. She has no idea that we’re still together. The bayou bombing wasn’t her.”

“Then who was it?” Katie asked with a frown. “Marcel?”

“No.” Klaus answered with a shake of his head. “There were women and children who were killed in that bombing.” Katie gave him a ‘so?’ look. “Marcel has one rule he never breaks. He never hurts children.”

“So if not the witches or either group of vampires…then who? The human’s, they have no reason to go after the wolves.” Katie asked.

Before Klaus could answer Cami called, “Marcel?” from the darkness of her bedroom.

“Are those two together now?” Katie asked and Klaus just hummed a positive answer as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. Katie saw Marcel’s name on the screen before Klaus hit call.

“Klaus, you need to know I had nothing to do with that business out in the bayou today.” Katie heard Marcel clearly in the silence of the room.

“I never thought you did.” Klaus replied. “I’m calling to let you know the priest is dead. Your exile is suspended for the next 24 hours. You may return to the quarter to bury your friend.”

“Why are you doing this?” Marcel asked, confused by Klaus’s mercy.

“Cami woke in the dark not knowing where she was or who was watching over her. It was your name she called.” Klaus answered. “If you can grant her comfort, so be it.”

“I’m on my way.” Marcel answered then hung up.

“That was nice of you.” Katie commented.

“If the situation were reversed, if Marcel were here and you in Cami’s place calling out my name in the dark, I’d like to think Marcel would do the same.” He explained as he wrapped his arm around her waist.

In a matter of minutes, a knock sounded on the door and Klaus answered it, letting Marcel in. He went straight to Cami so Katie and Klaus left.

TVDTVDTVD

The next morning Katie once again woke before Klaus and after watching his restless sleep she brushed his slightly wavy hair back out of his face. When her fingertips touched his scalp Klaus’s dream took over her mind's eye. He was in the church, looking down at a baby in a coffin. “Hi.” He cooed to the baby then started to pick it up, but the sharp squish of a stake through his body made him stand up straight, blood poured from his mouth as his eyes met hers seeing her in his dream. But her eyes were trained on Mikael who stood behind him, his hand on the indestructible white oak stake that was sticking out of Klaus’s chest.

Klaus turned to face his father who grabbed him by the neck. “Greetings, Boy.”

Klaus took in a guttural breath, waking from his dream with a start and Katie pulled back her hand. Klaus’s eyes found hers that were frowning at him in worry. He squeezed his eyes closed and pulled her closer, resting his forehead on her chest. It was clear he didn’t want to talk about it. So she simply placed her hand on the back of his neck and rubbed it comfortingly.

Eventually, though they got out of bed, showered and dressed for Father Kieran’s wake at Rousseau’s. When they walked into the bar, cheery music was being played by a band in the corner while people drank and a few danced. “How could I have guessed that a New Orleans wake would be nothing like a regular wake?” Katie asked as they walked over to the bar where Klaus ordered a drink then took a seat in a corner booth. The whole atmosphere felt wrong for the mood Klaus was in. His bad mood put Katie in an odd mood as well.

Both of them were staring down at the table when Cami joined them. “Hey, earth to you.” Both of them looked up but said nothing. “Listen, I wanted to thank you.”

“Unless you come equipped with the means to fill this,” Klaus held up his glass that now only contained ice, “No additional platitudes are necessary.”

Cami looked at Katie who just gave her a tight lipped smile and shrugged. “Okay.” Cami drawled then looked back at Klaus. “I’m in a crap mood because my uncle just died and people are partying like it’s Mardi Gras. What’s your excuse?”

“I’ve been having dreams about my dead father.” Klaus admitted out loud for the first time. “No diagnosis necessary, love. I’ve already got this one covered. My fears of fatherhood, of scarring my child as my father scarred me are manifesting as nightmares.” He grabbed his drink only to remember that it was empty. “So horrifically cliché.”

“Okay, why don’t I go get you a refill?” Katie asked as she grabbed his glass and Cami stood from the curved booth to let Katie out.

She was standing at the bar when Marcel walked up beside her. “How are you?” he asked as he put his arms on the bar and sat down.

“Considering I saw a priest die, turn, try to kill me then get staked yesterday…I can confidently say I’ve been better.” She told him as she looked across her shoulder at him. “Not to mention Klaus is in a mood and this bartender is incredibly slow.”

“Let me help you out.” he flagged down the bartender and he ordered his drink then motioned for the bartender to take her order too.

“Thanks.” She told him with a small smile.

“You’re welcome.” He told her with a smile that showed off his perfect white teeth. “So how’s your old man? I haven’t heard from him since he left.”

“He is living in our old house and dating my best friend’s mother.” Katie answered as the bartender set Klaus’s drink and her coke in front of her.

“How weird is that for you?” he asked curiously.

“Only very.” She answered as she turned and saw Cami get up from their booth and head their way. “I should get this to Klaus before the ice melts.” She started to walk off.

“Wait.” Marcel said as he gently grabbed her elbow. “I want to thank you for whatever it was you said to Klaus to get him to let me come here and be a part of this…to be there for Cami.” He told her genuinely.

“Your thanks are unnecessary.” She told him honestly. “I had nothing to do with it. That was a mercy granted by Klaus himself with no influence from me. But just so you know, you have my condolences on the loss of both of your friends.” she told him, talking about Father K. and Thierry. Then turned and headed back over to Klaus.

A few minutes later Marcel grabbed a glass and a bottle and clinked them together making the band in the corner stop playing. “I know I haven’t been around these parts lately.” Marcel started. “It’s a testament to Father Kieran that we could come together and share a drink and a story or two. Kieran rolled into town on a rusty old cruiser after his daddy died 25 years ago. And, damn it, that guy could party.” Everyone in the room laughed and Cami smiled. “That was, of course, before he took his vows. But even then, he was committed to the quarter. He knew that this town needed him and we still do.” He held up his glass for a toast. “To Father K.” The rest of the room echoed him, but Katie watched Camille try and fail to not cry before she disappeared into the kitchen. Not long after the band started playing the cheery music again Francesca went into the kitchen with Cami.

Katie scooted over in the booth as Elijah joined them with a bottle in his hand. He was pouring them both a drink when Katie saw Cami storm out of the kitchen and Francesca came out and ordered a drink. “It seems rather uncivilized…” Klaus spoke up bringing Katie’s attention back to their table, “to laugh and dance around the body of a loved one.”

“Yes, far better to practice your process of grief, isn’t it, Klaus?” Elijah asked as he capped the bottle. “Denial, rage, and hoarding coffins in basements.” When Hayley walked over to them Elijah scooted closer to Katie and offered Hayley a seat so she took it. “I will warn you, Hayley, Niklaus is in a spectacularly foul mood today.”

“Sod off.” Klaus complained as he grabbed the bottle and refreshed his glass.

“What’s the deal with these moonlight rings?” Hayley asked, ignoring the brother’s banter. “Oliver’s trying to start a revolution every five seconds. People are scared, angry, and frankly I’m tired of stalling.”

Katie rolled her eyes at Hayley and placed her elbow on the table and rested her head in her hand. “It’s a day of peace, Hayley. Try and enjoy it. In the meantime the rings are in progress. I will live up to my word. We will find and punish whoever launched the attack on the bayou. But right now, I’m gonna finish this bottle and the next in the hopes of drowning the demon that has chosen today to haunt me.” he held the bottle in his hand up and looked up at the ceiling. “Cheers, Mikael. Impeccable Freudian timing.”

Elijah looked at Hayley as he sat up straighter. “Will you give us a moment?” Hayley nodded and left them and Elijah looked at Klaus. “Elaborate. Have you dreamt of our father?”

“Go ahead, have a good laugh.” Klaus told him grumpily. Katie felt a little out of place sitting between them, keeping her mouth shut.

“I can assure you there is not a piece of this that I find even remotely amusing, Niklaus. Especially considering I’ve been dreaming of him too.” Elijah told them, being completely serious.

“What?” Klaus asked.

“If you are also seeing him…” Elijah looked across the room at Genevieve who just joined the party. “Perhaps our elusive, unknown enemy is orchestrating a further attack.”

When Klaus looked at Genevieve she gave him a coy smile, clearly whatever mistakes Klaus had made with the two of them had been resolved or forgotten. “Well then, what better way to punctuate a day of peace than by killing someone?” Klaus gave her a smile and wiggled his fingers at her in a wave.

While they had been talking Katie had been thinking. “As much as I would love for you to kill her, I don’t think she’s the cause of this.”

“What do you mean?” Klaus asked with a frown at her.

“I think it’s your father’s doing.” She answered. “Remember what Bonnie said about the spirits on the other side being able to interact with our side?” she asked and a look of realization that this wasn’t a trick, but really his father messing with them, appeared on Klaus’s face.

“Would one of you be so kind as to fill me in?” Elijah asked.

“The purgatory that supernatural souls get trapped in when they die, the one that Bonnie is the anchor to, it’s been tampered with.” Katie told him. “Souls are being torn away into nothingness and the vale between our side and theirs is thinning. I’m fairly certain that the dreams you’ve been having are really your father reaching out from the other side and messing with your heads.” Katie explained.

“So you’re saying that our father, faced with permanent extinction, has decided to spend his remaining time tormenting us.” Elijah summarized. “How delightful.”

“On the plus side we’ll soon be rid of his abhorrent soul forever.” Klaus spoke up. “And what a good riddance that will be.”

“And I may or may not lose Bonnie, again.” Katie said putting two and two together for the first time since talking to Bonnie. “I need to make a call.” She pushed Elijah’s shoulder and he let her out of the booth. He followed her out as she pulled her phone out of her pocket and dialed Bonnie’s number.

This time Bonnie picked up after just a few rings. “Hey, what up?”

“Are you going to die?” Katie asked, getting straight to the point.

“I don’t know what you’re-” Bonnie started.

“If the other side ceases to exist, will you disappear with it?” Katie asked and looked over her shoulder when she felt Elijah touch her back. Bonnie didn’t answer. “Answer me Bonnie.”

“Yes.” Bonnie finally answered.

Katie squeezed her eyes closed. “Please tell me you guys have found a way to stop it or to at least save you.”

“If I did I would be lying.” Bonnie answered, bringing tears to Katie’s eyes. “The other side is just a spell cast by a witch…it requires balance and when those travelers overpowered me they messed with the balance.”

“So toss another weight on the scale.” Katie told her pacing back and forth, Elijah standing by not knowing what to do.

“You know that’s not how it works.” Bonnie told her with a shaky voice. “When the other side goes, so will I. I’ve accepted it and I know it’s a lot to ask, but I need you to accept it too.” Bonnie’s voice cracked and tears started slipping down Katie’s cheeks.

“No, Bonnie, I’m not going to accept that. You can’t just…disappear.” Katie argued.

“I don’t have an option. So I need you to listen to me because I don’t know how much longer I have it could be a week or it could be a day.” Katie stopped pacing and wrapped her arm around herself turning her eyes to Klaus who walked out of the bar and over to her and Elijah where they stood under the awning of Rousseau’s. “I love you and I am so proud of the woman I saw you become while I was on the other side.”

“Stop it, Bonnie, don’t tell me goodbye. I can’t hear it.” Katie begged.

“Yes, you can.” Bonnie argued and Katie could tell by her voice that she was crying but trying to sound strong. “You want to know how I know you can hear it?” Bonnie asked and Katie just sniffled. “Because you are strong and you will only get stronger.” She heard Bonnie sniffle before she kept talking. “So I’m going to tell you that you’ve been the best friend a girl could ask for and I will forever be grateful for that. If we find a way to save me and the other side, I’ll call you and if I don’t call just…know I went peacefully, okay?” Katie didn’t say anything back. “Katie, say okay.”

Katie took in a deep breath then let it out as Klaus cupped her cheek in his hand. “Okay.”

“Goodbye, Katie.”

“Goodbye, Bon.” Katie replied then heard Bonnie hang up.

“Klaus?” Genevieve’s voice made Klaus turn to see her walking over cautiously. “Is everything okay?”

“Now is not a good time, Genevieve.” Klaus told her.

Elijah handed Katie a handkerchief and she gave him a small smile in thanks. “Actually, Genevieve, I’d like a minute of your time if you have it to give.”

Genevieve looked at Klaus who gave her a nod. “Of course.”

Klaus and Elijah walked over to one of the free tables and sat down while Katie and Genevieve sat at another. “What do you know about the other side, the purgatory that supernatural spirits get stuck in when they die?”

“I know that it’s separate from where the New Orleans ancestors reside and it was created by a vengeful witch. But that’s about it. Why do you ask?” Genevieve answered.

“Because the other side is disintegrating and a friend of mine, a witch, is the anchor. When the other side is gone, my friend will be gone with it.” Katie explained as another tear slipped down her cheek. “I know you don’t like me and you have no reason to help me, but I hear you’re really good at what you do and-”

“Katie,” Genevieve interrupted, “if the other side really is unraveling there’s nothing I can do to save your friend.” Katie’s shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry.” Genevieve got up from the table and walked over to Klaus and Elijah, but Katie paid it no mind and rested her head on the table.

After Genevieve went back inside Klaus went to Katie and held his hand out for her so she took it and let him walk her home. They were about to walk through the doors into the courtyard when a chill ran down Katie’s spine as she looked around, but didn’t see anyone. “Are you alright?” Klaus asked, noticing that she had stopped.

“Yeah, just caught a chill.” She brushed it off.

TVDTVDTVD

The next evening Katie sat in the church between Elijah and Klaus listening to people talk about Father Kieran and his life. If Katie was being honest she was blocking it all out, not listening for fear of it turning into Bonnie’s funeral in her head.

After the service Kieran’s coffin was placed into the back of a horse drawn carriage and everyone gathered behind the carriage to walk behind him on his journey to the cemetery. Katie coughed for the millionth time that morning and Klaus placed his hand on her lower back as Elijah rubbed her shoulder and asked, “Are you alright, you look-”

“Like a beluga whale wrapped in black?” Katie asked.

“I was going to say you look lovely.” Elijah countered with a smirk.

“I do wish you’d stop comparing yourself to large sea creatures.” Klaus told her as Katie coughed again. “Elijah’s right, you look beautiful as always, but you sound horrible. Are you sure you’re alright?”

“Yeah, it’s probably just a head cold.” She answered.

“Regardless, I’m taking you to a doctor after the funeral.” Klaus insisted.

“Fine if you…” she had to stop talking and cough again, “insist.” She finished the sentence between coughs and when she pulled her hand back the brothers saw blood on her palm. The next cough brought with it a stream of blood that filled her hand and coated her clothes.

Klaus caught her when she passed out and he and Elijah brought her to the compound. Genevieve, having seen Katie faint, followed them.

TVDTVDTVD

Katie awoke lying on a table in the courtyard, all the color the place once had was washed out and as she slowly sat up a movement to her right caught her eye. She turned to see Mikael walk into the courtyard. “Mikael?” Katie slid off of the table putting it between them. “This has to be a dream…like you’ve been doing to Elijah and Klaus.” She was thinking out loud, stalling whatever was to follow the evil look in Mikael’s eyes.

“On the contrary, my darling,” Mikael told her as he walked around the table and Katie started backing away, “this is very real.” Mikael whooshed at her and wrapped his arm around her neck from behind. “Welcome to my hell. Stuck in an eternity of watching over that hideous creature my children call brother.”

“Let me go.” Katie growled as she tried and failed to pull his arm off of her. “You call him a monster, but the only monster I see in this family is you. You’re the pathetic one who can’t get over the fact that your wife screwed a werewolf. Even in death you can’t see that your pride…your wrath…made your children everything that they are. Your son-” he tightened his arm around her neck cutting her off.

“He is not, my son!” he yelled and threw her away from him. She managed to stay on her feet. “He’s a scourge, a walking symbol of weakness.”

“Of whose weakness?” Katie countered. “His or your wife’s?” her retort pissed him off and he grabbed her neck in his hand, pinning her to the wall of the courtyard.

“Are you any better than her?” he asked with a dirty look down at her stomach. “Laying with a beast when a true Mikaelson pines for you.” she grabbed his arm and practically snarled at him, fighting him though she knew it was useless. “Though you may try…there is no saving that atrocity festering in your womb. Klaus will destroy it one way or another.”

“Unlike you, Klaus loves his child. He’d never hurt her.” Katie rasped.

“Better it dies now and you along with it.” Mikael told her as he reared back his head, the veins appearing under his eyes, preparing to bite her. Whimpers and growls left her as she fought with all her human strength to escape his grasp.

A guttural gasp sounded out through the courtyard as she woke up back in the real world and sat straight up on the table in the courtyard. “It's okay, Sweetheart, I’m here.” Klaus told her as he brushed her hair, dampened by his blood that he tried to give her to save her, out of her face. “I’ve got you, you’re safe.”

Katie closed her eyes for a moment, catching her breath, before she looked around, noticing Genevieve standing behind Klaus before she looked at him. “Is the baby okay, can you hear her heartbeat?” Katie asked with wide eyes.

Klaus nodded. “It’s strong, but you’re going to a doctor in the morning whether you like it or not.” He told her so she nodded.

“Until then I can examine her, if you’d like." Genevieve spoke up and Katie gave her a why-are-you-here look.

“She saved you, and our baby.” Klaus told her so Katie looked back at Genevieve and gave her a nod.

TVDTVDTVD

Katie lay on the bed of her room next to the nursery while Genevieve examined her. When she was done she helped Katie sit up. “Thank you for saving me today.” Katie told her as she stared down at her hands folded in her lap.

“I didn’t do it for you.” Genevieve told her matter-of-factly with her nose in the air. “I did it for Klaus.” Katie pursed her lips and pulled them to the side with a nod. “You’re in the clear, but I’d still take it easy and go to a doctor in the morning.” Katie gave her a salute as Genevieve left, shutting the door behind her.

Katie had showered and was sitting at the vanity in the room writing in a notebook when Elijah found her. The party in honor of Father K was still going on in the street and the jazz music floated up into the room. “I seriously don’t get the way people in this city grieve. When I die please don’t party it up like it's freaking new years eve.”

“You almost did.” She stood from the vanity to look at him as she crossed her arms over her chest. “The last time I felt that….frightened was almost a year ago when for the second time in my life I heard your heart cease to beat.” Katie didn’t know what to say so she didn't say anything as he cleared the distance between them and brushed her hair out of her face then cupped her cheek in his hand. “It reminded me how important you are to me.”

Katie’s eyes slipped closed for a second, pushing back tears, before she looked up at his narrowed, dark chocolate brown eyes. “Where are you going with this?” she asked quietly.

“I don’t let people in, but you…with your compassionate soul, made your way into my heart during a time in my life when I didn’t want to feel anything.” The overwhelming amount of love in his eyes pulled at her heartstrings. “I love you, Katie.” Her brows drew together and she swallowed hard as she picked up her foot and started tapping her bare toes into the hardwood, a sign he knew meant she was trying to keep her emotions in check. “Not as Hannah, not as a lover, but as my friend,” he placed his other hand on her other cheek, holding her face in his hands, “my family.” A tear slipped down each of her cheeks and he swiped them away with his thumbs. “It’s a love that, in a thousand years, I have never felt before and one…I hope is reciprocated.”

He thought when she grabbed his wrists and took his hands from her face then turned her back, that she was rejecting him, but as he watched her walk over to her vanity and pull a Tiffany blue box out of a drawer he knew that wasn’t the case. “You…” she started, as she turned and started walking back over to him, “can press my buttons almost as easily as Elena used to.” She popped the box open, took out the necklace then tossed the box on the bed. “But I never stopped loving you, Elijah, not even for a second.” She held the necklace out to him then stuck out her left wrist.

He took the necklace, but didn’t wrap it around her wrist. “Not even when I compelled you?” he asked curiously as he walked over to her vanity and sat down.

Curious as to what he was doing, she walked over to watch him. “That was a hard one to forgive, but no, not even when you compelled me.” she answered as she watched him manipulate the delicate chain links to turn the necklace into a bracelet by doubling the silver chain on each side of the silver, horizontal infinity sign with diamond accents and a rose gold heart in the center of it. When he was done he stood up and motioned for her wrist. She held it out, letting him fasten the necklace, turned bracelet, around it.

She looked up from her wrist and gave him a small smile as she wrapped her arms around his neck, rested her chin on them and closed her eyes as she felt his hands press into her shoulder blades. When they pulled away he gave her a small smile and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. “You should get some rest.” She just gave him a half smile and a nod and he left her to sleep.

TVDTVDTVD

After speaking to Marcel before his allotted time in the French Quarter was up, Klaus returned home to find Katie sitting at her desk in their quarters writing something on pretty stationery. When she noticed he was back, she capped the pen and put it and the letter she was writing away.

“I assumed you would be asleep after the day you’ve had.” He told her as she stood up and he closed the space between them.

“No, I had a song swirling around in my head and needed to get it down before it disappeared.” She told him as she slipped her hands up his chest that was still clad in his black tux.

Seeing the sparkle he grabbed her hand, looking at the bracelet. “Should I be worried?”

She moved her arms to rest on his shoulders as she looked into his eyes then smiled. “What do you think?”

“I think…” he slid his arms around her waist, “I see a symbol of my brother’s undying love for you on your wrist.”

“Yes, but the love it represents has finally changed to match my love for him.” she told him.

“And that type of love is…?” he prompted.

She rolled her eyes at him and dead panned. “Seriously? After everything you still have to ask?” he gave her a crooked smile and a blink that told her no, he didn’t, but he still liked to hear it. “Elijah and I are officially life long friends and I believe it this time.” She told him with a pointed look then changed the subject. “So where did you disappear to?”

“I needed to speak to Marcel before his time in the quarter was up.” he told her with a look around and when his eyes met hers she could tell there was more on his mind.

So she walked over to the bed and sat down, needing to get off her tired feet, then jerked her head for him to join her. So he did. “Talk to me.”

“My father may have been influencing my dreams, but the fear of scarring our child as my father scarred me is real.” He admitted quietly as he dropped his eyes to her hand that he took in his.

“You’re not your father.” She assured him with a shake of her head. “And you never will be.”

“Are you so sure?” he asked.

“Yes.” She answered without missing a beat. “Look at me, Klaus.” When he didn’t she scooted closer to him and cupped his cheeks in her hands making him look at her. “You will be an amazing father because unlike yours, you will love our daughter unconditionally. I know that, because in 1828 I was where you are now, terrified by the aspect of raising a child, of becoming my mother or even worse, my father…I was even scared that I would resent my child for permanently tying me to Ronan for the rest of my life…but none of my fears came to pass, because I promised myself I would be a thousand times better than my parents ever were. The only difference is you have something that I didn’t.”

“What’s that?” he asked with a slow blink at her.

“A supportive partner, who knows about your struggles, understands them and will be there for you…always and for however long my forever may be.” She answered. She was going to add that he had Elijah, but she was cut off when a gasp left his lips as he closed the space between them, catching her lips in his in a kiss that told her everything he didn’t know how to say. When it broke he rested his forehead on hers and wrapped an arm around her waist. “I’ve got you, Big Bad Wolf.” He gave her another kiss before he stood and went to their closet, grabbed them both a set of pajamas then shut the bedroom door.

After they changed they laid in bed, Klaus on his back while Katie used him as a human body pillow with her head resting on his shoulder. His hand played with her hair, relaxing her. “You should really be asleep right now.” He told her quietly.

“There’s something you should know.” Katie told him, getting a curious look from him. “I saw Mikael today…while I was…out.”

“And what did he say to you?” he asked stiffly.

“You mean before he tried to kill me and your daughter?” Katie asked rhetorically. “Just the usual untrue ramblings of an abusive, piece of shit, pathetic excuse of a father.” She told him recalling what she had called Mikael to his face the first time she ever laid eyes on the horrid man. “I would have told you as soon as I woke up, but it wasn’t really any of Elijah or Genevieve’s business.”

Klaus kissed the top of her head then turned off the lamp. “Get some sleep, both of you.”

“Pretty sure we don’t take orders from you.” Katie told him with a playfully sassy tone to which he just laughed.

A/N: Reviews are highly appreciated. :-)

#the vampire diaries #the vampire diaries fanfiction #tvd #tvd fanfiction #klaus mikaelson #elijah mikaelson #rebekah mikaelson #klaus mikaelson fanfiction #klaus mikaelson fic #klaus mikaelson x oc #klaus x oc #klaus mikaelson x oc fanfiction #klaus x oc fanfiction #elijah mikaelson x oc fanfiction #the originals #the originals fanfiction #to #to fanfiction

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sopxhiea · 4 years

Text

Wicked

Alfie Solomons X Reader

Enemies to Lovers!

Warnings: Large age gap.

Summary: Y/N and Alfie keep their relationship under the sheets until another familiar face emerges, the dangers of being with each other prevail.

Part 1 | Part 2

"Were you jealous?" "No... maybe..."

“You grow on people, but so does cancer.”

The sound of paper shuffling fills the coffee smelling room, the windows are sealed shut. The oak walls are new, something done in addition to the decor in the office. There’s no record playing like there usually is, it’s a quiet day.

And there’s you.

There is a book in your hand, underlining your hearty attempt to do as little work as possible. It’s summer, the birds are chirping and the kids are running around. You’re on your last pile of papers, then you’ll be out.

The coffee is not cold, somewhere in the lukewarm area while your eyes catch a bird in the sky from the window next to your desk. Your floral dress is not usual attire, you’re not the one for girly things but it’s something he’s bought you.

Your head has been in the clouds, you think.

You have things to blame: work, your brother, business associates and the incoming season but you of all people know that the main reason for your distracted state is somewhere in Camden town shouting at his men for a small error.

There’s another appointment today, as your assistant tells you while you try your best to keep up the focus. It’s the Shelby company. You nod, they’re not the most pleasant but you’ve seen worse. You ask your assistant to be present in the room when they arrive so that things are more in order and he nods.

The pages of the book find your fingertips once again, the windows are now open. The smell of coffee mixes in with the freshly bloomed flowers around the office’s window as you read, enjoying the brief moment of peace before it’s interrupted.

Your head goes where you tell it not to, the place where you relive the events of the past. It’s not that the events are unpleasant, it’s quite the opposite if anything which is why you can’t afford to go there during work. You try to keep the thoughts in the back of your mind but a few surface regardless of your effort.

You recall all the moments.

His name on your lips like a prayer while the walls of your room echo, the only thing that can be heard throughout the house is his skin against yours and the moans he bestows upon you each time his hips meet yours. Your nails dig into his back, all he can feel is pleasure while you feel yourself find ecstasy in different forms.

There’s a loud knock on the door.

The Shelbys come in, they’re all in their casual attire but they can’t help to glance a look at you in a floral dress. You look much too picturesque for anyone’s seeing.

“Mr. Shelby.” you say before sitting down, it’s him, Finn and Michael today. You give Finn a generous hug as an old friend and Michael watches, there’s an uncertain look in his eyes but you ignore the lad and sit down.

“Ms. Y/N.” he says before his lips meet a cigarette, the other boys just watch you as the conversation carries on.

Thomas says something about the deal your deceased father’s company has to do with you, you nod and scribble down a few notes as he speaks. It’s almost like a ritual, you’ve memorised the lines of professionalism no matter how tight your family once was with the Shelbys. It’s no longer a family you’re concerned with, it’s a business.

An hour like that passes, you bounce a couple ideas off of each other and ask Finn about how he had been doing. Michael doesn’t speak except a few times to make snarky remarks but you’re quick to shut him down with your wit. You do not cast a look at him for the rest of the talk.

The older one out of them says something about a marriage, how John and Esme had been happy from an orderly marriage and the importance of having a family of one’s own, especially when it comes to a woman. You don’t listen to what he’s saying up until he says the last part and that’s when you put your pen down and stare straight at Thomas, eyes not wavering in the slightest.

“What is it you came here to tell me, Thomas?” you say, loud and clear and you catch a look in Finn’s eye, one that makes you panic in the slightest.

“Our Michael here has taken a liking to you. Your age is close to his. The business and the families will also surely benefit from something of the sort.” he speaks and watches you laugh and it’s genuine.

“So you’re saying I should marry your cousin, is that it?” you speak, bewildered at the thought but it somehow manages to amuse you, your assistant is listening the whole time while he stands next to you.

“I’m saying you should consider it, is all.” he says and you hear Micheal say a few words as well but your mind is way too blurry. You applaud the audacity Thomas has but the offer is much too rough and inconvenient.

Any girl would jump at the opportunity, you know. But you’re not any girl. You like the family, you’d known them for the longest time due to the family business you were involuntarily a part of. They’re ok people and the business would surely benefit from the finite alliance that would be formed.

But you find your heart to be somewhere else, in somebody else’s hands.

You dismiss the idea with the shake of your head and you see Finn beam up as you say no to the offer. He knows Michael won’t make you happy. You thank the Shelby family for the inappropriate offer and refuse to indulge. Thomas doesn’t seem too surprised but you find it hard to look past the disappointment in Michael’s face.

With a tight hug given to Finn as he whispers ‘good job’ into your ear for refusing his cousin, the office becomes empty again.

----

The room smells of flowers and rum, there are dried flowers in the vases, most of them are roses bought a week ago. The sound of shuffling in the sheets fill the room, it’s only your breathing against his for a second before you get up.

Your bare back is what he sees while your hair is in a low bun. He longs to caress your hair like he did a couple hours back but he knows your rules are the rules. They’re loud and clear and all he thinks of some days.

A soft sigh leaves your lips, a dull ache is present between your legs while you walk around the room, his eyes drink your bare figure but he’s seen and done entirely too much for you to be embarrassed or feel the need to cover up at this point.

You avoid the thumping of your heart when you see the adoring look he’s giving you.

He’s mature and experienced enough to know that there were bound to be feelings forming after a while. He is to blame, mostly, or so he thinks. You’re young, beautiful, smart and witty and he knows that this was bound to be casual and still is but he finds himself craving you more and more each time.

It’s a cliche story, he says to himself while watching you put a robe on.

He blames himself for falling for the trap. He’d been with many women, some in brothels and some in parties and nothing had mattered to him. There had been a couple memorable faces, ones he thought about but no one made his heart soar like you did, even though you were in front of him.

He’s heard about the offer from the Shelbys, maybe that’s why he thinks about you a lot more these days. When looked objectively, it’s none of Alfie’s business and he knows that. This is you, sleeping with the enemy and he applauds just how well you were able to hide everything, your tracks are impossible to trace back and no one knows you chant his name until you see stars most nights.

You catch the longing look he has in his eyes when you’re on the bed next to him once again. You sit up straight and face him as he leans back on the head of the bed. You raise your eyebrows, telling him to speak but you know him too well. He doesn’t need to say much.

“So you’ve heard?” you speak in the silent room once you’ve made a rough plan of how to handle things. You know he’s gotten attached to you despite this being an under-the-wraps thing, you have too.

“Heard what, luv?” he says, tugging at his beard while you eye his form that’s half covered with a white sheet. You offer him a smile, it’s not quite a grimace but he sees the sentiment and watches as you nod.

“Alfie...Don’t play dumb with me, please.” you speak, your voice is so soft that he feels his heart melt like butter at the last word. You look at him, like a little kid before he speaks.

“I have, yeah, Ollie told me about that fuckin’ Gray kid...” he speaks but his voice is soft despite his words. They don’t cut through you like glass but you feel a little hurt. He doesn’t seem to say what’s on his mind.

“And have you heard my answer?” you ask him and see a spark in his eyes. He stops cold at his tracks, hand no longer tugging at his beard but his sole attention on you.

All that he’s heard is that Micheal wanted to marry you, there was no answer given in what Ollie had told him. He’d assumed you’d said yes and that this was maybe one of the last times you were letting him in between your sheets.

He shakes his head.

“I said no on the spot.” you say not looking at him but he makes his reaction known when a grunt of extreme approval leaves his lips. He feels himself cheer up, a weight leaves his shoulders and you meet his eyes at last.

You see the real him, vulnerable.

“Good.” he says, nonchalant about it the second after but you catch something in his eye that tells you he’s happy, he looks relieved.

You then decide to test the waters, finding no harm in indulging in a little playful behaviour, mostly because he’s recovering from the happiness of you not marrying someone, let alone someone from the Shelby clan.

"Were you jealous?" You speak and watch a smile form on his lips, he looks like he doesn’t care as he answers to you. He pauses for a while, then he speaks.

"No.........maybe..." he says while a whole hearted chuckle leaves your lips. He watches as you laugh and not make a deal out of it. You like that he cares, even though it’s the one thing you’d agreed not to do.

It was undeniable, that this whole arrangement is set in dangerous waters. You were fond of him, had always been and letting him worship you in the bedroom just made it worse for you. You had your borders built, steel walls that would not melt.

But they were melting, slowly.

At times, it was his smile and the way he said your name, you felt yourself melt inside. Your skin against his as he caressed your knee under the table when you ate together, even though no one was around to witness the occasion.

You threw yourself onto the bed, your hair creating a contrast with the white sheets while Alfie practically swooned at the sight. He leaned against the headboard, a lazy smile on his lips while you chuckled at his words lightly. He lets himself get carried away, like most times when he’s with you.

And he forgets that actions have consequences at that moment.

--------

The inside of the closet is small, there’s a faint light coming from one corner that’s not fully shut. You hold your breath while the sound of talking slowly fades away. Your legs hurt from standing but you don’t complain, you can’t have the risk of someone hearing.

It’s the usual story.

It’s a Tuesday afternoon where you found yourself in Alfie’s office, on top of his desk as he planted all kinds of kisses on your neck to be specific. The deed is done until someone walks in, someone other than his assistant and you panic, resulting in you hiding in the closet next to the door where they hang the coats.

You hear the light footsteps leave while Alfie’s heavy thuds follow him until the door is closed. The doors of the closet open then, you blink a few times to adjust to the light and he watches you as you get used to the surroundings once again.

“I thought he was never going to leave.” you speak into the room, Alfie’s both embarrassed and happy at once.

He hates that he has to hide the most beautiful girl from the world and the relationship he has with her, if he has one at all. His love is domestic, he wants to show you off in his arm and sleep in with you. He finds himself daydreaming about how wonderful it would be just to be carefree, not be alarmed all the time in the case of someone seeing you two together.

But he’s the enemy. And it seems as though that isn’t going to change any time soon.

“Tha’ fucker is way too talkative for his own good, luv.” he says, amused at his words while he watches you sit down on the chair in front of his desk.

“He stayed for over and hour.” you speak while shaking your head, putting one of your legs on top of the desk while rubbing your knee to give some sort of relief from standing too much but your hands are no good for a massage.

So then, he sits next to you and takes your leg on his knee, slowly massaging his way up and down while you watch. He seems nonchalant about the act of kindness while his hands slowly caress the soft skin of your thigh and he feels you flinch at the discomfort caused by standing up for too long.

“It’s alright, yeah.” you hear him speak, it’s almost a coo like he was speaking to a baby and even though you ate being babied, you don’t speak.

You smile at him, it’s far too genuine for him to ignore and he stares at your lips as you speak, he finds himself far too deep in the hole of love for you. “You grow on people, but so does cancer.”

He smiles at first and then it turns into a hearty chuckle and you watch, feeling yourself to be too attached to the man before you. You know the rule, you’d set it up yourself.

Don’t fall in love with him.

But there he is giving you a gentle massage for no reason while mumbling something about the museum he went to as a kid. He says something about a painting and you hold onto the meanings but your head is far too gone. He switches the topic to the train tracks around but you don’t quite follow.

You know there are borders. He’s significantly older and a family enemy. You’d heard way too many things from one too many people about how terrible this bear of a man was but you can’t ignore but notice just how gentle he is to the ones that matter.

You murmur as he watches you with wide eyes. “Thank you.” And you put your foot on the floor, it’s no longer in between his hands. You know the massage is not done and neither is the make-out session you were having before someone decided to barge in but it needs to be.

He’s the enemy, you remind yourself.

You put your coat on and fix yourself up a little before facing him, realising that you’d lost some good time waiting for that man to leave but there are more important things to discuss.

“Alfie...” his name leaves your lips and he leans against his desk, watching you as the chains along his thighs find their place once again. “Do you want to keep doing this?” you ask, a part of you is scared but you need to know because you know both of you are in the edge. If this keeps going on, you’ll fall for him and he already has one too many dreams about you.

He tugs at his beard and the shade of blue in his eyes changes as he becomes serious. He knows you’re in the brisk of catching feelings and he already has. He also happens to realise that this was the one thing you asked from him, that he wouldn’t fall for you.

It was fun at first, he thinks. He didn’t mind that you weren’t in his bed the next day or that there was no sign of you after the sex. But then you’d made him breakfast and met Cyril, you’d stayed for a while after you’d been with him and laughed at his jokes and listened when he spoke, really listened.

He finds himself reliving the moments where the sunlight would illuminate your smile on the days where you’d scold him for not waking you up earlier. You’re far too young for him but that’s only on the age department since you’re maturer than anyone he’s known.

He wants to ask for more but he knows that’s not the deal he’s made with you.

Your curious eyes ogle him as he thinks, he’s not getting to be with you due to the position you both are in so he thinks it’s best to settle for what he has with you right now. So he nods and starts speaking.

“If ya’ want to, right, things have been fuckin’ smooth..” he says as you watch him speak, his words are harsh this time as they cut through you. “...and I, right, haven’t fallen’ for ya’ like ya’ warned me about..”

He speaks in a less bothered manner but you can see through him, he’s saying the last part to convince himself, it’s not directed at you so you nod. He’s lying, you know it but he’s grown enough to admit that to himself, or so you figure and nod with a cheerful attitude, even though things are shattering inside your heart.

“Well, that makes the two of us then.” you speak but unlike him, you’re good at not being vulnerable when speaking and especially when it comes to him. He finds it hard to conceal his real feelings with you so he doesn’t but you do, and you’re damn good at it.

He stands there, stunned and hurt. You feel the same way, about everything, but you’re clever not to show any emotion. You want the same things as he did but you were far too clueless when you got into this meddle, thinking that it would be a simple exchange of sex and a couple shared meals.

It might be your inexperience, he thinks, that you offered the opportunity in the first place since arrangements like these usually end in disaster and rarely without someone getting hurt. He’s willing to hurt if it means that you’ll get out of this without the pain of utter heartbreak but what he misses to see is that you’ve already started falling for him.

You shake your head with a chuckle at his expression but there’s not much to be said. He knows the consequences, he always has. It’s not a question of ‘if’ you’re going to fall in love with him, it’s a case of ‘when’ on both parts and you know this dance is a dangerous one, all that does is attract you to the idea even more.

You say the one thing that resides at the back of your mind each time you see him and he listens, nodding his head at your words while your soft voice fills the room.

“Don’t fall in love with me. That’s the only rule.”

And you’re out, leaving a confused and brokenhearted Alfie behind the now closed doors.

----

Tagging: @clairecrive @parkbearum @sourirez @bicevans @mollybegger-blog @97freaknik. @fuseburner

a/n: Let me know what you thought of the chapter!!

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kurts-still-here · 3 years

Text

Hugs and Hickeys Kurt/Sam FanFiction

Hi everyone, I was inspired to write another Hevans fic by someone on Archive Of Our Own and because I love them so I’d appreciate it a lot if you checked it out and told me what you think. You can leave any comments on here or on Archive Of Our Own or FanFiction.Net. Thank you!! 😁😁😎😎

Archive Of Our Own: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32896744

FanFiction. Net: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13929156/1/Hugs-and-Hickeys

Kurt and Sam were currently in Kurt’s bedroom, in the middle of making out. They had been waiting for this day for a while now seeing that they had to be very careful and had to plan out their make-out sessions and dates since they were dating in secret. Secret relationships were hard work.

Kurt had Cheerios practice on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays from 6:00 to 9:00 and then Sam had football on Mondays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays from 5:00 to 8:00. They both had glee club together on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 4:00 to 5:00 which only gave them Fridays and the weekend to hang out and go on dates. But seeing as no one else knew about their relationship except their parents who had promised to keep it a secret it was hard to come up with excuses as to why they couldn’t hang out with their friends over the weekends.

Finn would always invite Sam and the glee guys over to their house for sleepovers and game nights and the glee girls would always invite Kurt over to one of their houses for a sleepover or for him to go to the mall with them. It was easy for Sam to make up excuses at first because he was able to say that he had homework or that he had to watch his siblings. But as time went on his friends had gotten suspicious of him because he would always use the same excuses over and over again causing Sam to have to come up with a different plan. Kurt wasn’t as lucky as Sam was in the first place because first, he was a terrible liar and second, he knew that his friends wouldn’t believe him if he told them that he had work to do over the weekend because Kurt was one of McKinley’s top students and always had his work done.

So eventually they just went with it and Kurt would go with the girls and Sam would go with the guys. Whatever free time they had they took advantage of. In the rare event that Sam was not invited over by Finn and that Kurt was not invited by one of the girls and Finn was over at Puck’s house, Kurt would invite Sam over and they would watch movies or make out or just sleep together because they were tired out from their busy lives. If Finn was supposed to come home at a certain time then Kurt would set an alarm as a reminder for Sam to leave before Finn saw them. Sam never wanted to leave so Kurt started adding an extra 5 minutes to the alarm to give Sam enough time to complain before Kurt kicked him out. Sometimes they would get really lucky and Finn would spend the weekend out of the house, allowing Sam to not have to leave so soon but that was an even rarer occasion.

Yes, their secret was hard to keep especially when they loved each other so much and wanted to be around each other as much as possible but it was also fun and romantic in a way. The way they could make eye contact and they could see the love they had for one another in their eyes. How they could look at each other and it was like an inside joke that was only for them. The way they would get all lightheaded and would feel fluffy inside when they brushed shoulders or accidentally touched hands with each other (even though it was never an accident to them). The idea of them being together but being the only ones who knew about it, not having anyone in their business was comforting and calming.

Ever since Kurt had personally introduced himself to Sam in the hallway when Sam had first joined the new Directions they knew they had loved each other, it was love at first sight. Sam had decided that if they won the competition then he would tell Kurt how he felt about him on their “date” but that never happened because Finn intervened. Sam came to the conclusion that even though he loved Kurt and he was pretty sure that Kurt loved him that Lima was not the place to be in a relationship with another boy, especially McKinley. So even though Kurt had broken off their partnership and they had gone their separate ways regarding the duets, Sam had still told Kurt how he felt about him and was relieved when Kurt said he felt the same way.

They had both agreed to keep the relationship a secret, only telling their parents because they had the right to know who their children went out with. Kurt had made his dad and Carol promise not to mention Sam and him to Finn because first of all, Finn was the reason that they had decided to keep it a secret in the first place along with bullies and second of all, because once Finn knew then the whole glee club would now and then the whole school would know and then the whole town would know and then so much for their romantic secret.

So yes it was hard but they made it work because they were so in love. They didn’t know how long they would keep it a secret but right now all they cared about was the time that they got to share with each other and it was enough for the moment.

Little did they know that soon their secret would fall apart and they would be exposed. And it was all because of Sam’s big lips.

“I love you so much Kurt,” Sam said while he kissed Kurt’s neck. “You’re so cute and hot and sexy and I love you.”

“I love you too Sam,” Kurt said, giggling. He loved how much Sam complimented him, telling him how good of a boyfriend he was or how good looking he was. How sweet and kind he thought Kurt was and how he wasn’t afraid to show his love for Kurt. Sam was the sweetest guy he had ever met. “You're sexy too.”

“I want to be with you forever,” Sam told him, in between sucking Kurt’s neck. “I want to go to New York with you and I want to be a model and you’ll be a successful designer and we’ll be rich and successful and we’ll start a family and we’ll be together forever.”

“You’re too cute Sam,” Kurt told him. “I want that to.”

They continued their kissing until Kurt’s phone went off, signaling that it was time for Sam to leave before Finn got home. Kurt pushed Sam away and Sam groaned before leaning in for another kiss.

“Sam, you do this every time babe,” Kurt said, reluctantly letting Sam continue to kiss him. “You have to go now or else Finn’s going to find out about us.”

“I hate Finn,” Sam said, pouting. “He’s a douche.”

“You know usually I’d stand up for him but he really is,” Kurt agreed. “But if we want to keep this between us then you have to go Sam.”

“Ugh,” Sam said when Kurt playfully pushed him away again. “Is it such a crime for a guy to want to make out with his boyfriend?”

“Sadly, apparently to some people it is babe,” Kurt said, sighing sadly to himself. “But remember that next week my dad is taking Finn to a football game with Puck and all the girls are busy so we’ll have the whole weekend.”

“I don’t want to wait,” Sam said. “I know we both agree that this is romantic but I feel like I never get to spend time alone with you. There’s school and glee and then I have football and you have Cheerios and then all our friends want to hang out and there’s only so many excuses I can come up with. I just want to kiss you and cuddle with you and go out on romantic dates with you. It’s not fair.”

“I know it’s not Sam but it’s just for the moment. It’s not like we’re gonna keep this a secret forever.” Kurt reminded him.

“Well how much longer do I have to wait before I can hold your hand in public without having to worry about being slushied or without having to worry about Finn?” Sam asked.

“Well when the time does come we’ll just have to deal with it. Let’s just remember how much fun it is to have our own little secret.”

Sam went into kiss Kurt again and Kurt accepted it but stood up making Sam stand up along with him and then grabbed Sam’s bag before walking him to the door, still attached to him.

“Sam” Kurt whined. “You have to leave, like now.”

“Come on, I still have a good ten minutes?” Sam guessed but judging by Kurt’s raised eyebrow he had gotten it wrong. “Five?”

“It’s not just if Finn sees you here. What if you two drive past each other? He’ll get suspicious and then he’ll ask me and you know how much of a terrible liar I am right? We’d get exposed and I don’t want everyone to find out from someone else. I want to tell everyone, with you, when we’re ready to. Now seriously, go,” Kurt said, one hand on his hip and the other pointing out the door.

“You know you’re really hot when you’re mad babe,” Sam said, a playful grin on his face. Kurt just smirked and rolled his eyes and Sam gave him one more kiss in the lips before walking out of Kurt’s bedroom.

“Call me when you get home,” He shouted after Sam.

“I will,” Sam shouted back and once Kurt heard Sam close his front door he closed his bedroom door and went to go get ready for bed.

He went into his bathroom to grab a washcloth and then put some water on it before walking back into his bedroom and going to sit at his vanity. He took all his skincare products out and neatly placed them on the table before taking the washcloth and gently pressing it onto his pale skin. And that’s when he saw…

A giant hickey on his neck.

His thoughts admittedly went to Sam (even though they had already been there) and he just stared at his neck with wide-eyes, softly touching the mark with his fingers. This could not be happening, this thing was huge. Of course it was, Sam had big lips and they were wonderful when you kissed them and Kurt loved it when Sam kissed his neck with them but never had he given him a hickey. Kurt had to admit that it was hot and he wasn’t mad at Sam for giving him one. He was nervous about how fast all of this could fall apart.

If his friends saw the hickey then they would obviously want to know who it was and once again, he was a bad liar. They would see right through him and it would only get worse when they would name off their list of suspects. They would probably think it was Blaine and of course it wasn’t Blaine so Kurt wouldn’t be lying to them about that. His friends would probably still think he was lying though so then they would probably contact Blaine seeing that some of them like Rachel and Mercedes were friends with him. Blaine would say no because it wasn’t him but then would get suspicious about why they had thought it was him in the first place.

Yes Kurt had had a small crush on Blaine but that was before he fell in love with Sam. His feelings for the Warbler were completely platonic now. Then Blaine would ask him why his friends thought that he had given him a hickey and then Kurt wouldn’t know what to tell Blaine because if he told him it was Sam then Blaine would definitely tell Rachel or Mercedes. Then the whole glee club would now and then the whole school and then the whole town and then their secret would be out.

Maybe he was overreacting and overthinking the whole situation and you could just tell him to cover it up with some makeup but then the makeup would get in his clothes and he couldn’t have that happening. You could just tell him to wear one of his stylish turtlenecks but it was April and turtleneck season was over.

After thinking this through and coming up with nothing he pulled out his phone and snapped a picture of him standing in the mirror, focusing on his neck. He then sent the picture to Sam and told him to call him when he got home, that it was urgent.

He paced back and forth in his room, forgetting about his skincare routine and instead focusing on the problem at hand. Sure he could just tell everyone that it was from Sam and that they were dating. Yes, Finn may bitch at them at first but he would get over it and he knew that the rest of the club would accept it but he wasn’t worried so much about them knowing as he was them telling. He didn’t want his romance with Sam to be scarred with slushies and locker shoves and dumpster dives. It was bad enough that he had to endure it, he didn't want the same for Sam. Plus, they had only been dating for about five months and he wanted their secret romance to last just a little bit longer.

He had continued pacing for about ten minutes when he heard his phone ring. He quickly picked it up and answered it, knowing that it was Sam.

“Hey babe,” Sam said through the phone. “Nice pic,”

“I don’t think it’s as nice as you think it is,” Kurt said, rubbing his temples. “You don’t see anything wrong do you?”

“No,” Sam said at first, confused. “But if this is about your clothes then you already know I don’t know anything about fashion so text Mercedes or someone else.”

“No Sam,” Kurt said, frustrated. “Zoom in on my neck and I think you’ll see the problem.”

“Okay?” Sam asked. “Give me a minute,”

Kurt patiently tapped his foot as he waited to hear Sam’s reaction.

“Whoa, babe, how come I didn’t see this before? Who did that to you because I’m gonna go and beat their ass right now?” Sam shouted into the phone. Kurt just rolled his eyes and shook his head.

“I’m pretty sure that it’s impossible to beat your own ass Sam,” Kurt said, plainly, waiting for Sam to understand.

“What do you mean? I didn’t hit you and give you a bruise,” Sam stated.

“Sam you gave me a hickey,” Kurt said, giving up on any hope that Sam would get it. “How does that look like someone punched me? Yes it’s a bit larger but your mouth is smaller than a fist honey.”

“Wait, I did that?” Sam asked, as his voice changed from confused to freaked out. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry Kurt. I didn’t mean to leave any marks. God, please don’t break up with me. I can buy you something to fix it with. Or…” Kurt cut him off.

“Sam babe, calm down. I’m not mad at you, it’s hot. I just don’t know how I’m going to cover something this big up. You do know that if the glee club finds out about this that they're eventually going to find out about us? I don’t want that to happen,” Kurt assured his boyfriend.

“Can’t you cover it up with make-up?” His boyfriend asked and Kurt thought it was funny that Sam thought it was that easy for him.

“Not unless I want make-up on my outfits. No, that’s not an option. My clothes are expensive and so is dry cleaning. It’s bad enough I have to deal with slushies and garbage juice.”

“How about something like one of those shirts with the long sleeves but the sleeve is for your neck… god what’s it called, I’m blanking on the name?” Sam asked and Kurt heard him snapping his fingers.

“It’s called a turtleneck, babe,” Kurt informed him. “But that’s also out of the question because it’s April and if I’m seen wearing a turtleneck in the spring then the girls will definitely know something is up and their first guess will be that I got my neck sucked.”

“Well that’s all I can think of.” Sam admitted. “Gosh, babe I’m so sorry. I ruined our secret.”

“No, Sam, don’t say that” Kurt assured him, changing to a softer tone. :You didn’t ruin anything, you just have to be more careful next time.”

“But your neck is your favorite place,” Sam whined. “And I like kissing it too.”

“You know me very well Sam,” Kurt joked but then he suddenly got an idea and he snapped his fingers. “I think I figured it out.”

“What is it?” Sam asked him, excitedly.

“I may be able to make a short-sleeved turtleneck using one of my out of season ones. Apparently they're really stylish in New York. All I would have to do is cut the sleeves and maybe do something with the cuffs so it doesn't look ridged.” Kurt thought aloud to Sam.

“Like I said, I don’t know anything about fashion but it sounds hot. And anything as long as it covers that up.” Sam told him, sounding hopeful.

“Okay then. Whew, that’s a relief. I can breathe again,” Kurt said, walking into his closet and finding the boxes that he had put all his last season stuff in. Yes, he was dreading wearing something from last season but at least it would be his own and he dreaded the thought of everyone finding out about him and Sam more. Sacrifices had to be made in secret relationships.

“Let me see here,” He told Sam. “I have a light blue one, a dark blue one, a black one and a white one. Seeing that it’s spring I think either light blue or white but what do you think babe?”

“Which one is tighter?” Sam teased and Kurt rolled his eyes.

“The white one but then it would be see through and I could always make the blue one together if you wanted. Plus the color would complement my eyes, don’t you think?

“I think you’d look great in anything,” Sam said.

“Flattery will get you far in life honey,” Kurt told him, laughing at his boyfriend’s comment. He really was the sweetest. He was so lucky to have Sam. “So I guess the blue one it is.”

He picked up the blue one and put the other shirts back in their box. He put the box back and walked out of his closet and back into his room. He took one of the mannequins that he had to make his own pieces of clothing and put the blue shirt over it.

“Okay, I gotta go now Sam but I’ll text you a picture when I’m done with it alright?”

“Okay, I’m sure it’ll be great.” Sam paused. “I’m really sorr…” Kurt cut him off again.

“Sam, honey you don’t have to keep apologizing. It was an accident and we figured it out. Besides, it's just another one of our little secrets right? Don’t worry about it, I was just freaking out a little.” Kurt assured Sam once again. He hadn’t meant to make Sam feel bad or to make Sam think that he was mad at him. Kurt just tended to stress out over everything and he always wanted to know what was going on or what was going to happen.

“Ok, I’ll forget about it. Good luck with your shirt babe,” Sam said. “Goodnight, I love you.” Sam blew a kiss into his phone.

“I love you too honey,” Kurt said, blowing him a kiss back. “See you tomorrow.”

Sam hung up and Kurt set his phone down on his bed before he turned all his attention to his project. He was in for a long night.

Kurt had spent four hours working on his shirt but it was worth it because he looked stunning in it. He had cut the sleeves and then folded them up and sewed them down. He had made the shirt skin-tight for Sam and had decorated the end of the sleeves with embroidery jewels. Then he paired the outfit with black skinny jeans, a pair of black leather boots and a pair of sunglasses. He had sent Sam a picture of his outfit when he had finished getting ready for school and Sam was ecstatic about the outfit. Sam had said that he was glad that he had given Kurt the hickey and that he should give him more, making Kurt roll his eyes.

Kurt grabbed his bag for school and headed downstairs to grab a piece of fruit for his breakfast. He walked into the kitchen and saw that the rest of his family was in there as well. He grabbed an apple and sat down at the table with his dad and Finn while Carol stood at the stove making Finn and his dad eggs and pancakes.

“Good morning sweetie,” Carol said when he had sat down. “You look nice today.”

“Thank you Carol,” Kurt beamed. “I made the shirt myself.”

“Well it’s lovely dear. Isn’t it a nice shirt, boys?” She asked her husband and son. Neither of them responded, Finn still being half asleep and his dad looking at the newspaper.

“It’s okay Carol,” Kurt assured her. “I know they aren’t interested into the fashion stuff.” They laughed together before she turned her attention back to making breakfast. Kurt really didn’t mind that his dad wasn’t interested in his outfit today. He didn’t want his dad to ask some stupid question like “You’re dressed up today, is it for anyone in particular?” and then stir up any suspension in Finn. It was better that his dad and Finn didn’t pay any attention to his turtleneck.

Kurt ate his apple while checking his social media and then waited for Finn to wake up and eat his breakfast so he could drive him to school. Thankfully the car ride was like any other day, they both sang along to songs on the radio and talked about glee club. Finn didn’t ask any questions about Kurt’s outfit which just made Kurt even more confident that his secret with Sam was safe.

When they arrived at school they walked in the building together and down the hallway before splitting up when they saw their friends. Finn went over to Sam, Puck, Mike and Artie while Kurt went over to the girls who were already standing at his locker, waiting for him.

“Look at you, white boy,” Mercedes said, holding out her arms to give Kurt a hug which he returned. “You look good.”

“When did you buy that shirt?” Brittany asked him. “I’ve never seen it before.”

“I made it Britt.” He told the girls proudly. “It was originally a last season, long-sleeved shirt but I cut the sleeves off of it and put some jewels on it and ta-da.” He informed them, spinning around. “It’s one of my best works.”

“It’s a nice shirt and it really shows you off but a last season shirt?” Quinn asked him, sharing a knowing look with Santana. “Are you okay Kurt?”

Kurt’s body froze for a moment but he quickly got a hold of himself and smiled and nodded to the girls. Of course if anyone were to notice something was off it would be Quinn and Santana.

“Yeah, everything’s fine. I was just really bored last night and I was going through my old clothes when I found this and you know, it goes with my eyes and I was bored so I made it my own..” Kurt rambled and was starting to think that he blew his cover. Now all the girls were looking at him funny, like he had two heads.

“Uh huh,” Santana said, slowly nodding her head. Kurt froze again as she walked up to him, taking her long manicured finger and lifting the collar of his shirt down to find out that he had a huge, hickey on his neck. “Exactly what I thought,” She said as she lifted the shirt down more so that the rest of the girls could see.

“Oh my god, Kurt,” Rachel loudly shrieked, capturing the attention of the guys who were on the other side of the hallway. “That hickey is huge.”

“Keep your voice down Rachel,” Kurt hissed at her as he pulled his collar back up. “I don’t need the whole school to hear that I have a huge hickey on my neck.” He frowned and paused. “But it’s not that bad right, like it’s not that big is it?”

The girls exchanged an uneasy look with each other before collectively saying “No” except for Santana who said, “Yes it looks like a fish sucked your neck.” Which made Kurt even more nervous since they could put two and two together and figure out that it was Sam.

Speak of the devil, Sam and the rest of the guys had come over to see what had made Rachel yell about Kurt. Finn, Mike, Puck and Artie were all confused while Sam stood in the back of the group, trying to make himself unknown to the group. Kurt was glad that Sam had been thinking and that he had stayed with the group because if Sam wasn’t there then that could just make him an even bigger suspect in their mystery.

“What’s going on?” Puck asked the girls.

“Yeah, what happened Kurt, why’d Rachel scream?” Finn asked him. Kurt was still to nervous to speak so he just stood there, knowing that one of the girls would eventually tell the boys.

“Someone sucked Kurt’s neck,” Brittany answered, dreamily. “Was it Blaine Warbler?”

“What? No Britt, Blaine and I are just friends plus Blaine’s mouth is not that big,” Kurt rambled, ignoring the looks on his brother’s and male friends’ faces. “We aren’t dating, just friends.”

“Well if it wasn’t Gelmet then who was it?” Santana asked him and the group turned a questioning eye on Kurt, pressuring him to tell the truth but Kurt wasn’t going to crack. He would lie if he had to whether they ended up believing him or not.

“That’s for me to know and for you to never find out,” Kurt told them, sternly. “It’s known of your business.”

“What if we guess?” Tina asked and the group nodded their heads in agreement with the idea.

“No, no guessing. I’m not telling you who it is, you probably don’t even know who it is.”

“I think I have a right to know who my brother’s dating,” Finn stated. “I mean does Burt and my mom know?”

“Actually they do,” Kurt told him. “And no, you don’t have a right to know. I’m a teenage boy, stop treating me like I’m a baby who needs his brother to look out for him. A boy sucked my neck, I don’t want to go flaunting it around hence the shirt.”

“See, you obviously don’t want us to know who it is because you know we wouldn’t approve which is why you’re so defensive,” Puck said, raising an eyebrow. “Who was it Princess, a bad boy, some motorcycle dude. Whoa, did you have sex with this guy?”

“No Noah, I did not have sex with this guy,” Kurt hissed as Finn grew pale and the rest of the group looked even more shocked then previously. “We made it, we’re dating, we love each other and I’m not telling you who it is. Give it a rest.”

“You aren’t getting off that easy, White Boy,” Mercedes told him.

“Yeah, we’re all friends here, if one of us had a hickey then we would totally tell each other who did it,” Puck said, Artie, Mike and Santana nodding along with him.

“I wouldn’t want to know that information,” Kurt mumbled.

“Just watch out Kurt,” Rachel warned him. “We’ll be watching your every move today and we will figure out who gave you that hickey.”

“Yeah and then when we do, we’re all going to have a nice chit-chat so we can figure out whether we approve or not,” Finn said. “Right guys?”

“Right,” All the guys said except for Sam who was just half mindedly listening in on the conversation.

“Umm Sam?” Artie asked him, waving his hands in Kurt’s boyfriend’s face. “Earth to Sam, are you with us?” Sam snapped out of his trance and looked up to see that everyone was staring at him. He quickly glanced at Kurt who told him with his eyes to say something.

“Uh, yeah right, We’re gonna find this guy Kurt and we’re gonna teach him a lesson.” Sam said, trying to sound like he was paying attention but failing miserably.

Everyone including Kurt just rolled their eyes at him and then turned back to Kurt as the bell rang, signaling that it was time to get to class.

“Remember Lady Hummel,” Santana lectured him. “We’re always watching.”

And with that everyone left Kurt standing at his locker as they walked off to their designated classes. Kurt was a complete wreck inside, seeing as his plan had completely backfired. Someone was going to figure it out and then they would confront him and Sam and then the truth would be out and then it would be so much for their fun, romantic secret relationship.

Kurt sighed and took out his phone when he heard it ding. He saw it was from Sam and opened it up.

To Kurt: Hope you aren’t mad at me for kind blowing our cover 😊

Kurt smiled and texted his boyfriend back.

To Sam: Of course I’m not mad babe, you just need to pay attention some more 😊

To Kurt: You look even better in person. See you later? 😊

To Sam: See you later. Love ya!! 😊

To Kurt: Love ya too!!

Kurt put his phone in his pocket and started walking to his first period class, thinking of how he was going to get through the day with his friend’s eyes constantly on him.

“Sam this is a disaster,” Kurt half yelled, half whispered at his boyfriend. He had managed to get away from all his friends and to find Sam so they could talk in private in the choir room. “They’ve literally been watching me all day. Santana and Brittany went through my call log and messages, luckily I had all our conversations deleted and then I was on my phone in the hallway and Puck and Finn nearly scared the crap out of me when they ambushed me and took my phone. I can’t take this anymore.”

Sam was just sitting down in one of the chairs as he watched Kurt pace back and forth, worried about how upset Kurt was. “What should we do?”

“I don’t know,” Kurt admitted, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. “I don’t know but we need to figure out something quick before they find us here.”

“Babe,” Sam said, concerned, getting up to take Kurt’s hands so he would stop ruining his hair. “It's not that serious, just calm down.”

“But it is,” Kurt cried. “I don’t want anyone to know. You know how much more harassment I’m going to get if the football team and the other jocks know that we’re dating. They’d think that I converted you or something and they’d be even more mad at me and then you would get tortured too and I don’t want that for us.”

“Well if that’s what’s bothering you then I don’t care about those dicks.” Sam said and Kurt laughed a little at Sam’s choice of words. “Seriously, I’d rather get slushied or shoved up against a locker a few times a day then see you this stressed out. Besides, I can always beat them up if they bother us.” He said, nonchalantly.

“Don’t you see though Sam. We shouldn’t have to worry about that kind of stuff. We shouldn’t have to go through that just because we love each other.” Kurt explained. “And sure you can beat them up but at the end of the day it’s not going to change how they feel about us.”

“Well it will send them the message to back off,” Sam said, hopefully. “I’d do anything for you Kurt.”

“And I'd do anything for you Sam,” Kurt said back, smiling.

Sam leaned forward to give Kurt a kiss which turned into them kissing each other, staying glued together.

“Sam, babe,” Kurt said, trying to get Sam to stop but even he didn’t want it to end. “Sam, we can’t do this here.”

“Why not?” Sam asked, innocently. “No one else is around and I want to kiss you,”

“You know exactly why not,” Kurt huffed. “At any moment someone could jump out from behind the door or something and then they would see us.”

“Well… and don’t get mad at me but what if we just tell them?” Sam asked and Kurt raised a questioning eyebrow at him. “Just the glee kids and we make the like, swear to secrecy. Then we wouldn’t have to hide from them anymore and we could hang out more.”

“Is that what you really want though Sam?” Kurt asked him. Yes Kurt wanted that but he also couldn’t fully trust the glee club to keep a secret because they were terrible at it. “Quinn and Santana are the most gossipy bitches in the school and I’m not saying that they’ll deliberately tell anyone but they have friends outside of this club, what if it slips?”

“Then we’ll deal with it when the time comes babe,” Sam said, rubbing Kurt’s hands. “But I’m not ashamed of you and I hope you aren’t ashamed of me, so I don’t want to hide anymore. At least not from our friends.”

“I’m not ashamed of you Sam,” Kurt said, taking his hand and brushing Sam’s cheek. “You're the best boyfriend in the world. You really want to tell them?”

Sam nodded his head eagerly.

Kurt sighed. He didn’t want to disappoint Sam by denying his request seeing that he was so happy about the idea of not hiding anymore. “Okay, yeah, let’s tell them. I’ll text them to meet us here right now.”

“Yes,” Sam exclaimed, pumping his fist in the air. He picked up Kurt in a giant hug and spun him around the room. “Now we can hang out more and I can kiss you more and we can actually go out on dates and we won’t have to worry about running into anyone. Yes, this is amazing babe,”

“I’m glad you think so,” Kurt laughed as he typed the message into the glee group chat.

From Kurt

To Everyone: Meet me in the choir room ASAP, I have something to tell you 😁

From Santana

To Everyone: Does it have anything to do with your mysterious loverboy?

From Brittany

To Everyone: ????

From Puck

To Everyone: ????

From Artie

To Everyone: ????

From Finn

To Everyone: ????

From Quinn

To Everyone: ????

From Kurt

To Everyone: Maybe, okay

From Kurt

To Everyone: Just stop with the question marks 😡

From Rachel

To Everyone: ????

From Rachel

To Everyone: Wait sorry I didn’t mean to do that

From Kurt

To Everyone: 🙄

From Santana

To Everyone: 🙄😑

From Finn

To Everyone: Okay little bro we’ll be there in a few

From Kurt

To Everyone: Take your time 😊

From Santana

To Everyone: You wish Lady Hummel

From Santana

To Everyone: I’m already on my way, running down the hall

From Kurt

To Everyone: 🙄🙄

From Santana

To Everyone: 😎😛😍

“Okay, they’re on their way,” Kurt told Sam who was jumping up and down in preparation for their big reveal. “So you just want to tell them outright or…?”

“Yeah, pretty much,” Sam stopped jumping and shrugged. “It’s not like we have time to plan out a song,’

“I guess you’re right,” Kurt said but then he saw that Sam’s face lit up and could tell that he had gotten an idea. “Sam? What are you thinking?”

“I’m gonna hide in the closet,” Sam said, casually. “And then when everyone is here I’m going to jump out and come over and passionately kiss you.”

“Okay, um wow babe, that’s actually not a bad idea,” Kurt said, thinking the plan though. “I actually love it.”

“You do?” Sam asked. “Wow, thanks babe.”

“You’re so smart Sam,” Kurt told him, going over and kissing him. “I love you.”

“I love you too babe,” Sam said, returning the kiss. “This is so awesome, I’m gonna go hide now,”

“Okay,” Kurt laughed. “Don’t make too much noise, alright?”

“I won't,” Sam promised him as he slipped into the closet. Kurt realized that not only would they be telling their friends that they had been dating each other for five months but Sam would also be coming out to them and the closet idea was cute.

Kurt paced back and forth with his arms behind his back as he waited for everyone to gather in the room. It was their free period right now so they should be there at any moment. And he was right because soon enough Santana and Mercedes entered the room, Santana out of breath from running across the school in order to get there. Kurt told everyone one by one to take a seat until everyone arrived. After Santana and Mercedes, it was Quinn and Tina, then Rachel and Finn, Brittany, Finn and Artie and then lastly Puck and Mike. Once everyone was seated Kurt stopped his pacing and addressed the group.

“As you all know by now, I’ve been secretly dating someone for five months now and it seems that you guys would like to know who it is,” He said.

“Damn straight Princess,” Puck yelled as everyone else nodded their heads. “Whos’ the lucky guy?”

“Well, Noah, you guys know him personally and I think that you’ll approve of our relationship but you have to promise us something, okay?” Kurt told them.

“What is it?” Tina asked.

“You guys can not tell anyone else. Okay, our parents know and you guys will know now but no one else. We don’t want to get any harassment from being together and we know that if this gets out to the school that they won’t like it. So do you guys think you can do this because you don’t exactly have a clean track of keeping secrets?” He asked them as Santana, Quinn, Rachel, Finn and Puck shafted in their seats.

“I think we can,” Mercedes said. “We’d do anything to see you happy boo.”

“What about the rest of you? I need to be sure that everyone is on the same page here,”

He got a collective response of “yes” and smiled, preparing himself for the special reveal.

“Okay then, get ready,” He clapped his hands together. “Get on out here babe,” He yelled and Sam opened the closet door like they had planned and then walked over to Kurt and gave him a big kiss in the lips in front of everyone. The glee club was shocked to say the least. Kurt and Sam kissed some more while they stared at them with their jaws dropped.

Kurt and Sam pulled apart from each other and turned to face their friends. “So, what do you think?” Sam asked them.

They were surprisingly speechless. It wasn’t like they didn’t approve because they loved both boys and saw that it was apparent that they were madly in love and that they cared for one another. It was just that they had thought that Sam was straight and they were 99% sure that it was Blaine the whole time. They were mad at themselves because with the size of the hickey on Kurt’s neck and the size of Sam’s lips the two clues fit together like a puzzle. They felt stupid.

“Um guys?” Kurt asked, waving his hand in front of the group. “Are you guys there?”

“Yeah, we are,” Quinn said, speaking for the group. “Just… processing I guess,”

“Well, what do you think?” Kurt asked them, happily. “Aren’t we cute together?”

“Yeah, super cute,” Artie said, blankly.

“The cutest,” Puck added.

Kurt and Sam shared a concerned look. “You guys are scaring us,” Sam admitted. “What’s up, you aren’t going to expose us are you.”

That snapped everyone out of their trance because they didn’t want Kurt and Sam to regret their decision in telling them the truth. “No, of course not,” Finn assured them. “It’s just…”

“I knew there was something fishy with you, Trouty,” Santana said, pointing an accusing finger at Sam. “No way you were straight.” Kurt and Sam just smiled.

“Wait, you said five months?” Puck asked, bewildered. “You’ve been dating since September and we didn’t know until now?”

“Pretty much,” Both boys said, shrugging.

“Wow,” Artie exclaimed. “That’s dedication right there,”

Everyone nodded along in agreement again. “Well we’re happy for you two,” Quinn beamed. “And we promise we won’t tell anyone else.”

“Yeah, we won’t expose you,” Puck added. “Anything for my bros.”

“Oh my god,” Kurt said, turning to Sam. “What a relief right babe?”

“Right,” Sam agreed, taking Kurt’s hand. “You wanna go out later tonight, like out-out?”

“Sounds great, I’d love to,” Kurt said, squeezing his hand.

“Wait, does that mean we can do double dates now,” Tina asked. Her and Mike had been wanting to have a couple to go on double dates with for a while now but they couldn’t stand Rachel and Finn and they were the only other actual couple amongst their friend group at the time.

“Sure, we’d love too, right Sam,” Kurt asked his boyfriend.

“Yeah, but not tonight.” Sam told them. “I haven’t taken Kurt out on a proper date yet and I want it to be special.”

Tina and Mike nodded their hands. “Aww you’re so sweet babe,” Kurt told Sam.

“I know I am,” Sam joked and Kurt kissed his cheek one more time before they went over to sit down and join their friends. Kurt felt like a ton of bricks had been lifted off his back and was glad that they had told their friends. And it was all because of Sam.

#glee #glee fanfiction #hevans #kurt hummel #sam evans #fluff

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