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queenmylovely · 4 years

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The Best Things Ain’t Free

Summary: Roger Taylor x fem!reader. After meeting through friends, Roger is impressed with your lifestyle and you’re impressed with his prettiness.

Word Count: 10.9k listen... she’s long

Warnings: cussing, smut (oral sex, fingering, etc.) (18+!! marked with ***)

A/N: This idea has been on my mind for ages because I can’t look at certain pictures of Roger in a fur coat without this thot. PSA that the most fictional part of this fic is reader being rich bc your girl ain’t. Let’s all use our best imagination and enjoy the life of the wealthy for a minute. Please leave feedback in any form whether it be tags, replies, asks, or messages, because I really do love hearing from you!

Masterlist; BLM Resources, Register to Vote (U.S.)

(these are what inspired this entire thing bc look at them!!! pics edited by me)

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Normally, you wouldn’t be one to go to a dingy pub to watch some band play a set. If you wanted to hear good music, you’d go to a concert in a real venue, with box seats and catering. And if you wanted a drink you’d go to the Ivy, Grenadier, Star, or if you really wanted a nice time, the Ritz. But your friend, Kalaya, from your time at Oxford (she had attended on a merit-based scholarship, bless her heart), had insisted that you come.

“They’re one of the best bands I’ve ever heard!” Kalaya gushed, trying to convince you to go.

“Better than the Stones? The Supremes? Janis?” you asked, referencing all of the concerts you had taken her to in uni. “We saw Janis the one and only time she played solo in London, are you telling me this student band is going to match her?”

“I said one of the best bands I’ve ever heard. And it’s not like you’ve never been to the bar before, it’s Angel’s, I took you there after exams junior year, remember?” Kalaya prodded, hoping that since it was at least somewhat familiar, you might be more likely to go.

“Oh yeah, I remember. Someone spilt a drink on me and I stunk like cheap beer for the rest of the night,” you said, wrinkling your nose in annoyance.

“C’mon you can’t condemn a whole pub just because one drunk idiot made a mistake,” Kalaya reasoned.

“Never would’ve happened at the Ritz,” you said with a huff.

Lucky for her, Kalaya never took you as seriously as you wanted to be and she laughed, “Stop being so stuck up, it’s not flattering.”

You stuck your tongue out at her, and she just rolled her eyes.

“Please, I need you to go. I fancy the guitar player and I can’t show up alone, you know I get nervous in crowds on my own,” Kalaya reminded you with her best puppy-dog eyes.

Your face broke out in a grin, “You didn’t say you fancied someone, oh my gosh, of course I’ll go! Tell me more about this guitarist.”

_____

The one caveat you had made Kalaya agree to was new outfits for the show. You would go to a grungy student pub to support your friend, but like hell were you going to dress the same as everyone there. After a few hours traipsing around Oxford Street, you both had completely new, fabulous outfits that were sure to stun, on your dime of course.

When you had first met Kalaya, she hadn’t liked you paying for things for her, but when you insisted that it only made sense for you to do or else you would be doing everything alone, she began to accept it. Plus, you had told her, the money was doing a lot more good being spent on fancy dinners and trips to the sea than sitting in some bank account in Switzerland. Anyway, your parents owned the largest shipping company in England, or something, so it wasn’t like there wasn’t plenty to spare.

“It’ll take about an hour and ten minutes by car, so we should leave about two and a half hours before the concert so we can get there early,” you planned out two days before the concert, during dinner at your shared apartment with Kalaya.

“Car? We can just take the train, it’s practically the same amount of time,” Kalaya replied.

“And get our new outfits all dirty before the show? No way, Chay can take us. I already told him about it and he’s bringing Martie so they can go too,” you explained. Chay (short for Charlie, short for Charles) was your family’s driver and Martie was his wife. They were in their early thirties so they still appreciated new music.

“What if something happens with Brian and I want to stay? Won’t Martie and Chay want to come home?” Kalaya said sheepishly.

“When that happens, we’ll just get rooms at that Inn on the boulevard and wait until morning to bring you home,” you said with a smirk.

Kalaya got her own cheeky smile, “And what about when you inevitably sweep some unknowing pretty boy off his feet? Where will they go without you to get the rooms?”

You hummed, thinking about all the boys that might be at the concert, “They have their expense card, of course.”

_____

The afternoon before the concert, the four of you met at the drive of your parent's house, ready and dressed for the night. You’re in dark wash bell bottoms, an emerald green satin top, and black leather platform boots. Draped over one arm you had your favorite fur coat, a dark brown mink, because although it was August, it got cold late at night, especially in Oxford. Kalaya had chosen a black flowy dress that came to her mid-thigh and made her medium-brown skin richer in comparison, and black suede booties. It would’ve been boring except for the silver and gold thread embroidering it, making it look like a starry night sky. She had told you it would be perfect because Brian studied stars.

Martie and Chay were a little more understated, as was to be expected since they didn’t have to try to catch anyone’s eye. Martie was in an orange floral dress in a similar cut to Kalaya’s, but a few inches longer. The orange of the dress and the yellow and olive green flowers complimented her dark brown skin with its warm undertone. Chay was in black bell bottoms, a dark red button-down with a paisley print, and regular black boots. You told him that he was lucky his skin was still tanned from the summer holiday because his typical paper-white skin combined with the outfit would’ve made him look like a vampire. Chay laughed sarcastically and Martie changed the subject by complimenting you two girls and then turned back to Chay, noticing his large collar was a little crooked and fixing it.

Everyone, including their overnight bags just in case, got into the car and Chay immediately turned the radio up, the four of you singing along the whole way there.

Once you got to the bar, the four of you grabbed drinks and sat at a table near the back because it wasn’t crowded yet. The group chatted easily, laughing at each other’s jokes and stories. You were all more like family than anything because Chay’s father was the family driver before him and he and Martie had been together since they were teenagers. Since Kalaya always came to all the family vacations (that Martie and Chay also came to, as “employees;” their only duty being a designated driver), the four of you were used to hanging out and going to clubs and concerts together.

Slowly, the bar started filling up and you turned to Kalaya, “We should probably go to the front now so we can secure a spot.”

Kalaya nodded, “Are you guys coming?”

Martie and Chay looked at each other, communicating silently in that way couples do. Martie answered, “No, we’ll stay here. Don’t wanna be around a bunch of sweaty students.”

“My sentiments exactly,” you said with a roll of your eyes and Kalaya elbowed you. Then you looked at Chay with a sheepish smile, “Can I leave my coat with you?”

“Yes,” Chay huffed with his own eye roll, but he was still smiling. “Now go on, get up there.”

Kalaya and you laughed and waved, hurrying to get a good spot close to the stage. That was one positive of a small venue, being close enough to the band to do some serious damage to your hearing as well as being able to actually see the sweat dripping down their temples and chests once they really got into the music.

The crowd grew around you and you were jostled a couple of times, but once you glared at the people who did it, that seemed to stop. The energy of the crowd grew and grew in anticipation and you heard lots of chatter about how excited they were to see the band. Maybe Kalaya hadn’t oversold them.

It wasn’t long before all of the stage lights went out and a booming voice came from all around, announcing the arrival of, “Your entertainment tonight, Her Majesty, Queen!”

You laughed, appreciating the audacity of the name as someone who liked to be somewhat outrageous yourself. The lights flashed back on and you realized that the band was already onstage; they went right into the first song, drums, guitar, and bass starting strong. You listened to the music, enjoying it already, but were more focused on checking out the band, which was easy because you were only ten feet away from the stage.

The singer was a slim, elegant man with light brown skin and jet black hair. His eyes were a warm brown and when he looked out at the crowd it was as if he was connecting with every person. Round lips and large teeth caught your eye and as you watched them enunciate every syllable, you couldn’t help but think they must make a wonderful smile. He was wearing a black satin jumpsuit embroidered and embellished until it shone in the light. Cheekbones sharp enough to cut and eyeliner just the same kept him on the rock side of glam, any softer and he could’ve been considered disco. And even though the concert had only just started, he was already completely into it; the energy he gave off as he strode about the stage only adding to the crowd’s.

Next you looked at the guitarist, Brian, who Kalaya was already staring at, mouth hanging open in a way that told you she didn’t realize how obvious it was. You gently reached over and tapped her chin, bringing her out of her trance and her eyes widened as she realized what she was doing. She started swaying to the music and looked around the stage in a much more casual way.

Back to the guitarist, as Kalaya had told you he was extremely tall, with some of the longest legs you had ever seen on anyone. With velvet black pants and a flowing white blouse, he was as glam as the singer. He was even more slim than the singer, and with the mound of curls that made up his head he kinda looked like a lollipop, nothing you would ever tell Kalaya. He had pale white skin, a prominent nose, and otherwise delicate features, but your main attention was brought to his hazel eyes that looked at the crowd as if he was surveying them. Overall you were thoroughly impressed with Kalaya’s choice to fancy him.

On the opposite side of the singer was the bassist, made clear by the fact that his guitar only had four strings and a longer neck. His clothing was a little more reserved than the other two, simply a black satin suit with a white satin shirt underneath. His chestnut brown hair was long and wavy, and it framed his also pale white face well. He was pretty relaxed in his playing, like it wasn’t that hard, but watching his hands you could tell the skill it took to stay on beat through some of the most complex rhythms. A soft nose, green-grey eyes that seemed kind, full lips, and a familiar feeling endeared him to you instantly, a smile coming to your face as he smirked when the singer pressed up against him.

Lastly, you turned your attention to the drummer, and just about gasped. Yes, the other three had been beautiful, but none of them were as pretty as him. His hair was shaggy, wavy, and dirty blonde, and heaven knew you loved your blondes. His white skin was lightly tanned which just made his baby blue eyes stand out even more. He was wearing some sort of black blouse but it was completely unbuttoned, leaving his chest that was toned from drumming totally exposed. You couldn’t see much else because of his kit but what you could see, your eyes ate up. As he drummed, his lips stuck out in a pout and his hair swooshed, glinting gold as he played the cymbals.

Kalaya had only been half-joking when she talked about you finding your pretty boy and now you had, your sights completely set on this drummer. Plus you figured that if Kalaya knew Brian, you had an automatic in.

Suddenly, you were making eye contact with the drummer but instead of being surprised or flustered, you started your mission. Biting your lip in a smile, rocking your hips to the rhythm he was playing, and tilting your head to the side, you made it clear you were checking him out. That seemed to spur him on and the drums got louder as he played harder. If he was trying to impress you, it was working, but more because it was a testament to his stamina than to his skill. Besides, you could see that you had done plenty to impress him by subverting his expectations and staring him down instead of swooning as soon as he caught your eye with his.

Not that there was anything wrong with swooning, in fact Kalaya was swooning over Brian at this very second because he had smiled at her, but you liked being the one to cause the swoon. You knew you were attractive and knew other people knew it too. You were confident and knew what you wanted, an energy you liked to radiate when you were around pretty boys.

The drummer was the one to break eye contact first, looking around the room for a minute as if trying to distract himself. Then he looked back at you and you just smiled and waved at him. By the way his eyes widened and cheeks pinkened further than they already were, you could tell he was a little flustered, and laughed, something you were sure he could see as well. He didn’t seem to be looking away this time, so you did instead, turning your attention to Kalaya to make sure she was doing alright.

“How’s it going, babe? He in love with you yet?” you half-yelled into her ear because the music was so loud.

She rolled her eyes good-naturedly, “More like I’ve just fallen further in love with him. But he has smiled and waved at me a couple times in between songs.”

“See? Don’t be all modest!” you urged.

“Well what about you? I see the eyes you’re making at that pretty boy drummer. He’s just the epitome of your type, huh?” Kalaya shot back.

You sighed happily, “He really is.”

About an hour later, the last encore was done and a cheap curtain had separated the band from the rest of the pub as they packed up their instruments. But apparently they would be joining the crowd later on, based on the talk of the people that had been standing around you up front. Not everyone seemed aware of this fact or maybe they just didn’t care, because the crowd thinned by half once the set was over. Quickly making a game plan, you and Kalaya decided to wait by the bar but not at the bar, in the path the band would most likely take from backstage to get a drink.

After waiting for only 10 minutes, you saw a curly head of hair bobbing through a doorway and realized they were on the move. You signaled to Kalaya with your eyes that they were appearing behind her (now out of their stage clothes), not interrupting what she was saying in an effort to remain casual. Once she had realized what you meant, she slowed her words, hoping to get interrupted. The blonde came into view and you flicked your eyes over to him just once, letting him know you knew he was there.

“Kalaya?” Brian asked, tapping her shoulder lightly.

Expertly, Kalaya turned like she was surprised, “Brian!”

They hugged quickly and she pulled back, “You all were amazing, just like last time.”

“Yes, well, I’m glad I actually have a chance to talk to you this time, instead of rushing off to deal with a flat tire on the van,” Brian smiled. Then he looked over to you and Kalaya jumped in.

“This is my friend,” she introduced you. “We went to Oxford together. She already knows all about you.”

Brian looked a little pleased at that, and Kalaya brought a hand to her mouth, realizing her faux pas.

“She means your band. She had to make a hard sell for me to come all the way back to Oxford to see the show,” you explained away what she said even though you all knew that wasn’t what she had meant.

“Well I’m glad you both made it,” Brian said with an easy smile. “Speaking of the band, I’d better introduce them all.”

Brian stepped back so he was in line with the other three and Kalaya turned so she was facing them next to you.

“This here is Freddie, our wonderful singer. Then we have John—”

“You can call me Deaky,” he interjected.

“Deaky then, our fantastic bassist. And finally our resident pretty boy himself, our drummer, Roger,” Brian finished with a bit of a smirk.

You all exchanged pleasantries and as Kalaya was drawn into a conversation with the rest of the band, Roger stepped closer to you.

“Pretty boy, huh?” You asked with a teasing smile. He nodded, about to say something in defense or make a jab at Brian, but you spoke first, “Glad I’m not the only one who thinks so.”

Roger flushed at that, a small smile coming to his face, but he changed the subject, “So you went to Oxford?”

“Yes,” you said slowly.

“Not a big fan?” he asked.

“No, I did really enjoy it here, just kind of small for my taste. I mean, over an hour to get to where anyone big’s playing and never having heard of fine dining? I suppose it was a good change of pace, or at least that’s what my parents say, but I’m glad to be back in the city,” you explained and Roger listened intently.

“So raised in London then?”

“Yes, except for the summers. Then it was Nice or Barcelona. Oh and one year New York,” you knew you were being a little overt with the flaunting of your upbringing, but you could tell that Roger was the type of person to enjoy the best things in life, and his eyes were as big as dinner plates as he listened to you, clearly impressed. “What about you?”

“Oh, I’m just from Truro, not quite as glamorous as all those,” Roger told you and while he wasn’t exactly embarrassed, you could tell he was waiting for your reaction.

“Truro’s in Cornwall, right?” you asked and Roger confirmed with a nod. “Then I’ve been there! Yeah a couple years ago Kalaya and I went on a trip to the sea and took a little detour to Truro, we loved it! Perfect for a little weekend getaway.”

Roger smiled big, your praising of his hometown charming him, “But how is Truro on the way to the sea? Wouldn’t you just go to Brighton or Southend?”

You smiled, laughing at yourself, “Well I got it in my head that I wanted to go to the very western tip of the country, and luckily Kalaya is a good enough sport to go along with my whims.”

“Do you often have these types of whims?” Roger asked and there was more cheek behind the words than in their meanings.

“Well I adore travelling,” you said, a little smirk coming to your face. Then you fixed your gaze to Roger’s eyes, “And my personal philosophy is to do whatever I want, whenever I want, with whoever I want.”

Roger swallowed, his mouth parted, and he blinked a couple times before responding, trying a laugh to cover for his reaction to your words, “A bit hedonistic, no?”

“Hmm, a bit like the pot calling the kettle black, no?” you responded quickly. Not that you actually knew that Roger was similar to you in that way, but watching how he reacted to everything you said made you sure enough to say that.

Scoffing as if that weren’t true, all he could say was, “What?--who?”

“How are the two of you getting on?” the bassist, John-- Deaky, interjected, coming to stand so the three of you made a triangle.

“Well Roger here just called me hedonistic,” you said matter-of-factly, looking at Deaky with wide eyes.

“Ha! You’re one to talk, Rog,” Deaky told him, clapping him on the shoulder and laughing.

Roger just looked at you, surprised that you would’ve brought it up to Deaky. You just stuck your tongue between your teeth and smiled victoriously; you loved to keep boys on their toes, especially ones that looked so cute when they were surprised.

Deaky turned to you, “You look really familiar, have we met before?”

“You know, I was thinking the same thing, but you had shorter hair, right?” you looked at him more closely.

He laughed and nodded, “Yeah, this is pretty new.”

“What university did you go to?” you asked.

“Chelsea college in London, I was in electrical engineering,” Deaky replied.

You exclaimed in recognition, “The scholarship dinner! You got my family’s engineering scholarship, that was like five years ago.”

“That’s right! We hung out during that tour of one of the facilities when our parents were talking endlessly,” he remembered and you laughed along with him.

“Wait, I thought the only private scholarship you got was from that family with the shipping business that are, like, filthy rich,” Roger said and you and John just looked at each other and then at Roger, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Then his eyes went wide, “That’s your family?!”

“Might wanna close your mouth Rog,” Deaky said with a laugh, tapping Roger’s chin as you had Kalaya’s.

A voice came from the bar and you looked to see Brian waving the three of you over. Deaky immediately started walking but you hung back next to Roger.

He seemed to be walking slowly because he was still processing the information, “I kinda thought you were exaggerating about the summer trips. And you weren’t kidding when you said whatever you want whenever you want, were you?”

You reached over and tucked a stray strand of hair away from his face and Roger looked at your hand as it dropped back to your side, “Mm-mm, wasn’t kidding about the whoever, either.”

Roger looked back up at you and you winked before turning to the others and gladly accepting the drink held out to you by Brian.

Chatting in a little group with Brian, Kalaya, and Deaky, you noticed that Freddie and Roger were off to the side but didn’t pay it too much mind. You were more focused on whether this Brian liked your Kalaya as much as she did he, and judging by the way he stared at her with adoration in his eyes as she talked, he did.

Standing apart from the rest of you with Freddie, Roger took a gulp of his drink as he looked at you laughing with the others.

“Fred, man, I can hardly keep up with this girl. We’ve only been talking for like ten minutes and all the things she says! I hardly know whether I wanna be with her or be her,” Roger told Freddie.

“What do you mean?” Freddie said with a confused laugh.

“Well she’s beautiful and funny and smart, sophisticated, has great taste--” “I think you’re confusing her with me,” Freddie interrupted with a sly smile.

“Ha-ha, Fred. Did I mention she’s also loaded?” Roger deadpanned.

“She’s got me there,” Freddie admitted. “Well are you going to do anything about it?

“I would, but she’s kinda intimidating,” Roger said and when Freddie looked confused he elaborated. “Like, she’s been flirting more than me tonight, even when we were onstage.”

“That’s saying something,” Freddie agreed.

“Exactly, so I feel like she’s someone who would want to make the first move,” Roger pointed out. And then a little quieter, “which you know I have absolutely no problem with.”

Freddie laughed loudly, “Well if things don’t work out between you two, I might just have to make her my best friend.”

“Hey, that’s me,” Roger said with a frown.

Patting Roger’s arm, Freddie rolled his eyes and told him, “I know darling, it was a joke.”

Deaky, Kalaya, Brian, and you got up from your seats at the bar, catching their attention, so they walked over to where you were.

“We’re walking the girls out,” Deaky explained because Brian was too busy chatting with Kalaya. Freddie and Roger nodded and then Deaky led the way, cutting through the crowd to the exit. Brian and Kalaya were lock-step behind him, and Freddie, Roger, and you followed up last, in that order.

“Leaving already?” Freddie asked you.

“Yeah, well if we want to get rooms for the night we better head over,” you explained.

“Oh are you staying at the Inn too?” Roger asked, his ears pricking up.

You nodded with a little laugh, “Seeing as it’s the only lodging in town, yes.”

Freddie laughed and Roger smiled sheepishly, thinking of something to say when you put your hand on his arm.

“Hold on a second, I gotta grab our ride,” you said quickly before heading towards the tables in the back.

Freddie and Roger shared a confused look, having assumed that the two of you would call a cab. You were walking back only twenty seconds later, slipping on your fur coat.

Roger gasped softly and gripped Freddie’s arm, “Fuck Fred, I’m in love.”

Freddie laughed, but his surprise-widened eyes were on the coat too, “With her or the coat?”

“Both,” he whispered back as you came up next to them, joined by a man and woman.

“Okay, quick introductions,” you said, realizing that you were standing halfway obstructing the doors. “Freddie, Roger, this is Chay and Martie. Technically Chay’s my family’s driver, but they’re both more like my siblings that I drag along to things like these. Chay and Martie, this is Freddie and Roger, of the band.”

“Yes, we assumed,” Martie said with a laugh, shaking Freddie’s hand first and then switching with her husband.

“Looks like we should head outside,” Chay pointed out, and the five of you exited into the cool night air. “We loved the set, you all were fantastic. And by the way, she did not have to drag us here, we were rather excited to see you guys ourselves.”

“Thank you, that’s very kind,” Freddie said with a warm smile and it was infectious enough that everyone smiled as well.

“Well, shall we go bring ‘round the car, babe?” Martie asked, always good at keeping Chay from getting too distracted.

“Yes, right, nice to meet you,” Chay said, and they all did their goodbyes.

You turned to Freddie and Roger, “Guess I’ll be leaving in a minute. I’m sorry we didn’t get to talk more, Freddie, I feel like we’d have a lot to talk about.”

“Me too dear,” Freddie said warmly. Then he gave you a pointed look, “But don’t worry, I’m sure we’ll be seeing each other again.”

You both knew what he meant, and by the looks of Roger’s flushed face, he did too although he pretended not to hear. It was hard to help the pleased smile that came to your face when you realized Roger must have talked about you to Freddie.

Freddie took a look at Roger and then said to both of you, “I’ll just go say goodbye to Kalaya then.”

He walked away and you took a couple steps toward Roger, until you were only about a foot apart. Roger wasn’t much taller than you, especially in your platforms, but from that distance you had to look up to look him in the eyes. You didn’t say anything, just looked at him and waited until he blushed again and looked down for a second, eyes landing on your coat.

“That coat looks great on you,” he rushed out, tucking a piece of hair behind his hair, which did nothing to calm him as it just reminded him of when you did earlier.

You looked down at your coat too, hands brushing over the soft, brown fur, “You like it?”

“Who wouldn’t?” he said quickly and you chuckled.

“You know Roger,” you stepped closer and put a hand on his arm. “I think we’d have a lot to talk about too. Probably have lots in common. You should call me sometime to figure out all what that is.”

With that, you reached into the inside pocket of your coat and pulled out one of your cards that you always kept handy ‘cause you never knew when a networking opportunity would present itself. You held the card up between your index and middle finger before reaching behind Roger and tucking it into the back pocket of his jeans. You let yourself linger that close to him and drank in his wide eyes, the way his mouth parted and how he seemed to be leaning down closer and closer to you.

“The car’s here y/n!” Kalaya called out to you, pulling both you and Roger out of the moment.

You looked at him once more, touching his arm again and then walking away. Throwing him a smile over your shoulder, you called, “See you later, pretty boy!”

Kalaya and you got into the back of the car and waved through the window to the four boys that were watching you leave. Once they were out of sight you turned to her.

“Good catch interrupting me and Roger then,” you told her.

“Always leave ‘em wanting more, right?” Kalaya said with a grin.

You laughed, “Right, exactly. By the way, things with Brian seemed to be going good.”

“They were, we had a lot of fun talking tonight. I think he likes me,” she said with a hopeful smile.

You nudged her, “I know he likes you. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you all night.”

“Same with Roger and you,” she pointed out.

“Well, I know he likes me too,” you said with a smirk and the whole car laughed. “You know if I were the type of person to get embarrassed, that’d do it.”

_____

A week later, during a giant heat wave that left no one able to do anything but sit inside and swelter, Roger called you around 7:00pm. Because you were lying on your bed with a fan pointed directly at you and you had a phone right next to your bed, it only took one ring for you to answer.

“Hello?”

“Hi, y/n?” you could tell by his voice it was Roger, but you kept that to yourself.

“Yep, who’s this?” you asked pleasantly.

“Roger from, um, Queen,” he said hesitantly.

“Oh, Roger, hello! You don’t have to say ‘from Queen,’ you know, I remember you perfectly,” you told him, sitting up so you were leaning back on your arm. Before he could say something in response, you started again, “So how are you, how are you doing? Have you had any more shows?”

“Good, I’m great. We had two more shows last weekend further north and we’ll have more next week around town--”

“Oh really? I think Kalaya and I would really love to go to another show, we so enjoyed the last,” you interrupted.

“Brilliant, you should definitely come, both of you, I can get you the details,” he returned and you interjected with a quick thanks. “But, what about you? How are you?”

“Ugh I’d be better, but it’s just so hot today,” you complained, flopping back onto the mattress.

“Well what are you wearing?” Roger asked and you grinned.

“Oh, getting a little cheeky are we, pretty boy? Haven’t even gone out and you’re asking what I’m wearing?” you asked mock-incredulously just to make him flustered.

“No--no, I just meant like if you’re hot, like maybe,” Roger was babbling, trying to find the best way to explain what he meant. “Just if you’re wearing layers or something thick or something I just--”

“It’s okay, I’ll tell you,” you said with a giggle. “Let’s see, I’m wearing satin running shorts, that to be honest are too short to run in, and one of those little strappy halter crop tops, you know the kind?”

“Y-yeah,” was all Roger could muster.

“So nothing that’s making me hot. And I’m not even wearing a bra so that’s not making me uncomfortable,” you reasoned as if this were a reasonable conversation.

You could hear his breath quicken over the phone and there was a pause where neither of you said anything.

“Maybe I should just go nude.”

You knew what you were doing, practically torturing the poor boy, but he had been the one to bring up what you were wearing, and it was the truth. But if you were simply answering his question with no impure intentions you would’ve been a lot less descriptive.

Roger made a sound somewhere between a groan and a laugh and then that was it so you sat up and kept going, “That reminds me, I’ve just had an idea. Today seems like a write off because it’s too hot to function, but it’s supposed to be cooler tomorrow, are you doing anything?”

He cleared his throat before he answered, “Um, no, I’m not busy.”

“Great! Kalaya and I were going to go shopping but I guess she’s hanging out with Brian instead. You can come with me and offer advice,” you told him.

“You’d want my advice?” Roger asked, confused.

“Yeah, I’ve seen your clothes both onstage and off. You have great style, Roger,” you affirmed and he smiled at the praise.

“Thanks, so do you. Um, that sounds great,” he replied.

“Okay, do you know the boutique on the corner of 10th and Wilder?” Roger hummed yes. “Good, let’s meet there at 11:30?”

“Perfect, looking forward to it,” he said flirtily.

You smiled, “Me too. Well, I should probably go, Kalaya and I are going swimming tonight at my parents’ to make up for her flaking out tomorrow. I’d invite you along, but even though my parents are out of town, they’d definitely hear about their daughter skinny dipping with some random pretty boy they don’t know. See you tomorrow!”

“I… bye,” Roger said, sounding incredibly sad that he couldn’t stay on or go swimming.

You hung up and then immediately rushed to Kalaya’s room to tell her all about the conversation.

_____

When you walked into the boutique at 11:25am, the clerk, Ayan, waved to you, as you were a frequent patron of the store. You had probably already seen all that there was to see, but thought that Roger’s fresh eyes might see something you hadn’t given much thought to before. There were a couple other customers around, but it was a little slow for a Saturday morning so you went to chat with Ayan about any new arrivals while you waited for Roger to arrive.

They were explaining that the boutique had gotten some fur coats from an estate that were in impeccable condition. The boutique was one of your favorites because it stocked mainly independent designers, consignment, and didn’t turn up its nose at thrifted finds of luxury items. In fact, it was where you had gotten your fur coat a few years before from the estate of a well known West End actress from the forties.

“There’s this one really lovely coyote--” Ayan cut themself off, eyes widening as they looked towards the door. “Don’t look now, but some special type of pretty boy is just about to walk in.”

Thinking only one person could fit that description, you looked, smiling as Roger walked in, scanning the store for you.

“You looked!” Ayan whisper-yelled and you couldn’t help but laugh. The sound drew Roger’s eyes over to you and you waved before turning back to them.

“Don’t worry, he’s meeting me. See you in a while with loads to buy under your commission,” you told them, winking.

“That’s why you’re my favorite customer,” they joked and you chuckled as you walked away.

“Hey, pretty boy,” you said cheerfully as you reached him before leaning in for a kiss on the cheek. He kissed you back and when you pulled back his cheeks were the cute pink that you were getting used to seeing.

“Hey, nice shirt,” he complimented.

You looked down at yourself. You were wearing high waisted medium wash denim shorts and a Hendrix t-shirt tied to the side at your waist.

“Thanks, I got it at his concert I went to,” you explained, smoothing it out.

“Where’d you see him?” Roger asked curiously.

“Royal Albert Hall, in ‘69. Me and Kalaya went together, it was a great show,” you said, remembering how it felt to see him perform.

“No way, I went to that concert too!” Roger exclaimed and you laughed excitedly.

“I wonder if we saw each other at all,” you said, smiling at the thought.

“Uh-uh, I would’ve remembered you perfectly,” Roger told you with a bold smile and this time, you were the one that was flustered.

“Should we start? I’m counting on you to find whatever I’ve overlooked in this store,” you said, changing the subject as you turned towards a rack of clothes.

“Do you have anything specific that you need?” Roger asked distractedly as he flicked through the hangers.

“The only need I have is to have all the best things this store has to offer,” you said airily.

Roger laughed and turned to you, saying teasingly, “Anyone ever tell you that you’re spoilt?”

“They usually stop when I pay them not to,” you said straight-faced, but Roger’s laugh made you break and you laughed together, leaning closer until you were sharing the same air and you placed a hand on his arm to steady yourself.

You were just wearing sandals, so Roger was taller to you than the week before and you actually had to tilt your head up to make eye contact this close. Roger’s laughter-brightened eyes looked at your still smiling lips and you noticed, the shift in mood making your breath quicken and your heart race. Under your fingers, the warm skin of his arm made you want to feel that warmth all over, and you wondered how long it would be until you could.

Then another customer brushed by, mumbling an “excuse me” awkwardly and the two of you were pulled away from a moment yet again. Your hand dropped from his arm and he turned back to the rack. It wasn’t long before your chatter started up again, especially as Roger found things that he liked for you to try on.

When he had made his way through the entire store, he had six things for you. He would have had a lot more but most of what he liked you already had.

First up was a black mesh long sleeve shirt that Roger told you to try on underneath your band shirt. It was longer than your t-shirt and you tucked it into your shorts, so your midriff that was exposed by the gap in between your clothes was covered by the mesh.

You came out of the dressing room, holding your arms out for Roger to see and doing a twirl, smiling widely.

“Do you like it?” he asked, smiling to match.

You nodded enthusiastically, “You know, when I saw this weeks ago I had no idea how to style it, but I love this! Very punk, street fashion, I’m a woman of the people.”

“Oh my gosh, never mind, I’m not sure you deserve to wear that,” Roger reached out and grabbed the sleeve, acting like he was going to pull it off.

“Stop!” you said through laughter. “You’ll stretch it out!”

He let you go and you went back in to try on more. There ended up being two dresses that you didn’t like because of color for one and the sheer amount of ruffles for the other. Then a shirt you realized you had in another color at home and a skirt that was itchy. Finally, there was a denim shirt that you didn’t really like because it was so plain. But you put it on anyway, figuring you’d humor him.

It was medium wash, the same color as your shorts, and it had some flowers embroidered in colorful thread which you supposed were nice, but overall it looked blah.

You stepped out of the dressing room again and Roger saw your not-so-happy face.

“What’s wrong?”

You scrunched up your face, “Don’t like it, it looks weird.”

Roger rolled his eyes with a smile, “That’s because you’re wearing it wrong. C’mere.”

You stepped close to him and he said a soft “may I” to which you nodded. His long fingers unbuttoned the bottom two buttons of the shirt. Then he tied it in a knot, fixing the ends so they laid correctly. His fingers brushed your skin and though they were warm, the feeling made you shiver. Roger was moving his hands so delicately, precisely, and you felt a rush of want go through you.

“And since you’re wearing a t-shirt,” even more carefully, he undid the upper buttons, leaving only the middle two done. Then he turned you around to look in the mirror and immediately your mind was changed. The way Roger styled it emphasized your waist instead of hiding it and now the monotone look worked instead of looking drab.

“How do you feel about it now?” Roger asked with a proud little smile.

“I love it, thank you,” you said, looking at him through the mirror.

Roger stepped past you into the dressing room and grabbed the mesh shirt, “Well here are your two finds.”

He handed the shirt to you, but before he could return his hands to his sides, you grabbed one of them, sliding your fingers along his to his palm and feeling the calluses there from drumming.

Roger watched your hand on his and only looked up when you started talking.

“Did you see anything else you liked?”

“Oh, do you want more than these two things? I can look again,” Roger suggested.

You smiled softly, squeezing his hand, “No, I mean did you see anything you liked for yourself? So I can thank you for helping me with these.”

“You don’t have to,” Roger protested.

“I might be spoiled, but I like to do some spoiling myself. I want to get you something, and this shop is too good for nothing to catch your eye. Anything you liked, nothing’s too much,” you told him, thumb rubbing over the back of his hand.

“Anything?” Roger hesitated.

“Anything, Roger,” you said, using your free hand to tuck a strand of hair behind his ear. That seemed to reassure him.

“I did see this display with this really gorgeous…” he trailed off, still uncertain, looking down.

“Really gorgeous… what?” you prompted.

“… fur coat,” he looked up to see your reaction. You were beaming.

“That’s the one Ayan was telling me about, the coyote one, right? It is gorgeous, they'll be so happy that it’s gonna sell already!” you exclaimed, using your hold on his hand to pull him over to that part of the store.

Roger followed you, a little confused about what you said, but glad that you seemed so happy. You let go of Roger’s hand, set your clothes on the corner of a nearby table, and pulled the coat off the mannequin, handing it to Roger. He pulled it on carefully, pulling the sides so they were equal.

“Here,” you put your hands behind his neck and then collected the hair that had gotten trapped underneath the coat and moved it to where it should be. He smiled his thanks and you smiled back, before turning him around to face the mirror he was standing in front of.

You stepped a little to the side of him and watched him look at himself. He let out a little laugh, the kind that meant “damn, I didn’t think I’d look this good,” and you had to agree.

Then he turned back around to you, “Whaddya think?”

You looked him up and down, the desire you felt earlier only growing, “You look… hot.”

Roger was a little surprised at your outright statement, but that was nothing compared to the surprise he felt when you grabbed the lapels of the coat and used them to pull him to you, kissing him full on the lips without hesitation.

As shocked as he was at the spontaneity, kissing you was something he had been thinking about for a while, so he recovered quickly, kissing you back. He put one hand just above your waist and the other on one of your hands, keeping it there.

But before either of you could deepen the kiss, you heard the sound of heels clacking and pulled back. Roger’s lips followed yours, and you giggled, leaning back towards him. You only planned to give him another peck but his soft lips distracted you for another five seconds or so before you remembered what you were doing.

You pulled back, dropping your hands, except Roger kept the one he had been holding and linked his fingers with yours, smiling at you. He still looked clear-eyed and focused after the kiss, so you decided that you had to get him home quickly so you could remedy that.

“So I was thinking we should go ring up and then go to my place. To drop off my new clothes and… stuff,” you said, a bit of a suggestive emphasis on the last word.

“Let’s,” Roger said, picking your shirt up off the table.

The two of you ended up taking off your new finds, figuring it’d be too hot outside for a fur coat and denim shirt, and then headed to the checkout. Ayan was pleased, but not all too surprised that you were taking home the new fur, even if it was technically going to Roger’s home. Roger, to his credit, didn’t have any more trouble with you paying, but insisted that he carry back all the bags. You agreed with the stipulation that he would still hold your hand, which he did.

You only lived a ten minute walk away, and Roger had taken the underground, so you walked the way home. There was chatting along the way, but it was hard to get too deep into any one topic with the feeling of each other’s hands and the anticipation of what was to come distracting you.

Once you got to your building, you were ushered in by the doorman that tipped his hat and wished you both a good day. Then the lobby manager told you a package had arrived and gave you a little thin rectangular box the size of a book. Finally you got into the elevator and the attendant hit the button for the highest floor, yours.

“It’s from my parents,” you told Roger about the box.

“Are they still travelling?”

“Yeah, they should be in Barcelona right about now,” you replied.

“Must be beautiful there,” Roger mused and you hummed in agreement. Then the elevator dinged and the two of you got off, waving to the attendant as the doors closed. You unlocked one of the two doors that were in the hallway (the other was the stairs), and opened the door, ushering Roger in first since he was carrying things.

You took off your shoes to the right of the entryway, next to a pile of other shoes and Roger did the same. Then you grabbed the garment bag that held Roger’s fur coat and hung it on the coat stand. You also took the paper bag with your shirts and put it on your dining table with the package as Roger followed you the rest of the way into your apartment. As you walked about, putting things where they went, Roger was looking around at your place. You had a dining area that turned into a living room with giant floor to ceiling windows on the walls that looked out over the city. Roger was absorbed by trying to see if he could see his building from here when he heard you calling him.

It took him a minute to figure out where you were; there was a long hallway that led to many doors. But it turned out you were in the first off of the dining room which was the kitchen.

As he came into the room, you looked up at him with a smile, “Here, wash up, I cut us up some peaches, if you like them.”

“Love ‘em,” he replied sweetly as he headed to the sink.

“Do you want anything to drink? I have water, soda, tea…”

“Water’s great,” Roger answered and you got two glasses. “I was looking out the windows, you have quite the view.”

“We’ll have to eat this in my bedroom, you can see Hyde Park from there,” you told him and he grinned excitedly, grabbing the bowl of peaches and then walking behind you, nudging you forward with his knee and you laughed.

“Right so, what are all these doors then? Seems like an awful lot for one flat,” Roger teased and you chuckled.

So you pointed to each as you came to it, “Bathroom, office, guest bedroom that Kalaya uses as a closet, Kalaya’s bedroom with an ensuite, closet that also leads to my room--”

“Wait, like a walk-in closet? Oh I have to see this,” Roger said, heading for the door.

“Later, later, I promise,” you said, grabbing his sleeve to pull him back. “We still have the pièce de résistance, my bedroom.”

With that, you pushed open the door and nudged Roger to walk in. He did, eyes quickly taking in your four-poster bed, vanity, bookshelves, record player and collection, chaise lounge, and finally matching windows to the ones in the living room. He walked over to the chaise which was in front of the windows and set down the bowl on the little side table, looking out the windows. You set down the glasses and stood next to him.

“Do you spend a lot of time here?” he gestured to the chaise.

“Yeah, when I’m home alone. I’ll just sit and watch the city live its life for awhile. It’s like people-watching but on a bigger scale,” you explained and he nodded.

So Roger sat down on the chaise, back against the raised end and legs spread out in front of him. He smiled at you and patted the space between his legs. You sat there, your back against his front, but you tilted yourself to the side so you could face each other more easily.

Roger grabbed the peaches and the two of you fed each other slices as you watched the city. It was a quiet and lovely moment with a growing underpinning of desire as the juices dripped down your chins and you kissed away the excess. Once the peaches were gone, you turned more towards him, catching his lips with yours fully once again. The taste of peach lingered on both of your lips, and the kisses were just as sweet as the fruit, just as soft as its skin.

Bringing your hands to Roger’s face, you swiped your tongue along his lower lip, moving it inside when he opened his mouth. Roger made a soft sound and wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer until your chests were flush. Your breaths pushed you even closer and the feeling was intoxicating, all your senses consumed by the warmth of the moment. You tried adjusting to straddle Roger’s legs, but the angle of the chaise wasn’t very easy for that, so you pulled back, laughing lightly.

Roger had been even further into the kiss than you were so he wasn’t exactly sure why you were laughing but smiled all the same. This time, you saw his unfocused eyes and the tilted grin on his face and felt very proud of your work. Standing up, you brought Roger with you, grabbing the belt loops of his jeans to pull him with you as you walked backward towards your bed. Then you spun him around, pulling open one side of the gauzy curtains that were draped over the frame of your bed, and pushing Roger onto the bed. He laughed as he landed, scooting back so you could get on as well, letting the curtain fall back to its original place.

The light filtering through the curtains was hazy and soft, painting both you and Roger in amber light. Roger sat so his back was against your pillows and you made your way up his body, straddling his hips. His hands tentatively rested on your thighs, but he looked around your room once more.

“If this wasn’t already obvious, I really like your-- your decor,” Roger’s voice faltered as you took off your shirt, leaving you only in your bra.

You smiled mischievously, “I thought you would, pretty boy.”

***

Then you reached for his shirt’s hem, pulling it over his head. It left his waves a bit of a mess, so you combed your fingers through his hair. He hummed and closed his eyes as you did. When you were done, you threaded your fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck and leaned in for another kiss. The two of you already had a rhythm of push and pull that made it easy to get lost in the kiss. Your free hand smoothed over the tan skin of Roger’s torso, sliding across his pecs and down to his waist, and you felt goosebumps erupt over his skin, smiling into the kiss.

Roger’s hands moved from your thighs, up your torso to your breasts, feeling your nipples harden through your bra and when you moaned as Roger thumbed them, he smiled as well. Your hands went down to Roger’s waistband and you unbuttoned his jeans, pulling down the zipper and starting to shift them down his body. But his hand over one of yours stopped you and you both pulled back from the kiss.

“Can I… eat you out first?” his request wasn’t what you were expecting, but the look of desire in his eyes and the slout pout of his lips sent a bolt of heat to your core and you nodded quickly, switching places with him.

He did take off his pants, tossing them aside, left only in his boxer-briefs. You could see his hard-on, but he was focused on you. Roger unbuttoned and unzipped your shorts, slower than you had his, and pushed them down your legs with your underwear.

Spreading your legs gently, Roger laid between them, turning his head to kiss up the inner thigh of your left leg. His mouth pressed wet kisses into the skin, making your tummy flip and just when he got to the top of that thigh, he switched to the other. Once he was done with both, he pressed kisses over your slit before dragging his tongue up through your folds. You let out a shaky breath as his tongue pressed on your clit, and you tangled your fingers in the hair at the crown of his head.

Roger formed his mouth around your clit and sucked softly, making you moan lowly. He pressed a kiss to your clit then looked up to you with wide eyes and asked, “Is that good?”

The way he asked wasn’t condescending like he already knew the answer, but more eager like he wanted to make sure it was.

So you hummed and nodded, “Yes, Roger, you’re so good, keep going.”

His mouth returned to your clit and he swirled his tongue around it, making you gasp out, “Oh-- yes, Roger, just like that, fuck.”

The praise made him even more set on making you feel good, so he brought a finger to your entrance, and pushed it in slowly. His mouth didn’t slow on your clit, but he was searching with his finger to find your g-spot, knowing he did when your legs twitched. Roger slipped in another finger with the first, immediately working on your g-spot and the feeling was so strong and so good that it was almost too much and your legs tried to close around him.

But Roger just used his free arm to hold you in place. He kept the same rhythm with his fingers and mouth and the pleasure within you just grew and grew. You could feel the tension in your lower stomach tightening with every brush of his fingers inside of you and every circle of his tongue on your clit.

“Oh, I’m close, Roger, fuck,” you managed to get out and Roger moaned against you, making your breathing uneven. “You’re such-- such a, fuck, a good, oh, such a good boy.”

Roger whined against you and you immediately came, the vibrations spreading hot pleasure all over your body as your back arched and you moaned loudly, tightening your grip in Roger’s hair. He kept going, wanting to make you feel as good as possible, partly because he couldn’t believe how hot it was to see you like that.

You were breathing like you had run a mile, but slowly coming down and you loosened your hold on Roger’s hair, combing through it again. Roger’s hum on your clit made you jump a little so you touched the side of his face to get him to stop; he propped himself on his elbows to look at you.

With a playful smileful you asked, “Did you like that, pretty boy?”

He just looked at you confusedly, so you explained, “Well you’re grinding into the mattress so I thought it must’ve been good.”

Roger’s eyes widened as he realized what he had been doing. He stopped, sitting up quickly.

“It’s okay. No need to be embarrassed,” you told him, sitting up and running a thumb over his pink cheek. “I’m glad you felt good too. Now, why don’t you let me make you feel even better, huh?”

He nodded and swallowed, “Yeah.”

You switched spots with him and leaned down for a kiss, running your tongue into Roger’s parted mouth and getting a taste of yourself in return. Reaching behind you, you undid your bra and took it off. Roger’s hands went to your breasts and you bit his lip when he pinched your nipples, moaning together.

You kissed from his lips to his jaw then down his neck, nipping again on his pulse point and where his neck met his shoulder. As you made your way down his chest, you pressed soft kisses basically wherever you could reach, and Roger squirmed a little underneath you, bright blue eyes watching your actions closely. A few kisses to his tummy and above his waistband and then you took off his underwear with his help, his cock hard and flushed red against his stomach.

Settled on your knees between his legs, and putting one hand on his thigh to steady yourself, you grabbed his dick in your other hand and bent down, pressing kisses along the shaft and then peppering them on the head. Roger moaned softly and you started pumping him and tongued his slit.

You sucked on his head, using your tongue to swirl around it and he groaned, looking at you with heavy-lidded eyes. Pulling off, you pressed a couple more kisses to this head and stroked him, “Such a pretty boy and such a pretty cock.”

Roger’s hips bucked and you hid your smile by going down on him again, not giving him any break. You worked your mouth down along with your hand, building a rhythm that was making precum bead on his head, which you happily sucked off.

Looking up at Roger, you saw that his head was tossed back, eyes closed with his lip between his teeth. You lifted your hand from his thigh up, brushing your thumb along his lower lip so he would let it go. As he did, he looked at you, tilting his head forward. His pupils were blown and he looked desperate as he watched you. You got an idea and a shiver ran across your body. You stuck your first two fingers out and slowly pushed them into his mouth, Roger’s lips immediately closing around them and starting to suck.

Both of you moaned; him around your fingers and you around his cock, making his hips buck again. You took him deeper in your mouth, as deep as you could go, gagging twice around his cock before pulling off again. You let the excess spit in your mouth fall onto his dick and used your hand to spread it around, jerking him off faster than before.

Roger was watching you intently, moaning whenever you twisted your wrist. You licked your lips and swallowed, “Your lips look so good around my fingers, Roger. You’re such a pretty boy, all desperate for me.”

He tried to say something that you could barely make out as “please.”

“Shhh, I got you. Do you wanna be a good boy and come for me?” you asked sweetly, lowering your head back towards his cock.

Roger nodded, keeping your fingers in his mouth, so you brought his head back into your mouth and sucked in time with your hand. You could tell Roger was getting close with the way his hips were shifting and you could feel the vibrations of his moans on your fingers stronger. His thighs were tensing so you pulled your fingers from his mouth, gripping his thigh with your wet fingers, and the slight dig of your nails into his skin set him off as he warned you hoarsely, “I’m gonna come-- fuck.”

He came as you jacked his dick off into your mouth, swallowing his cum as quickly as you could. His high moans of your name ignited a burn between your thighs but you focused on the task at hand. You pulled off, stroking him slowly now and using your tongue to lick any leftover spots of cum off his head. As his breath evened, you pressed one more kiss to his head and then sat up and moved to lay next to him.

***

Roger turned towards you and you kissed him quickly. You tangled one leg between his and started brushing his hair away from his still flushed face. One of his hands rested on your waist, tapping out a simple rhythm.

“You’re-- you’re good at that,” he told you with a little smile.

“Thanks, so are you, pretty boy,” you said, smiling when he flushed. “Are you ever not going to blush when I call you that?”

He looked away, then looked back, an unbelieving laugh escaping him, “Probably not.”

“Good,” you laughed, bringing him in for another kiss.

Later, after cleaning up, as the two of you were redressing, Roger remembered that he had yet to see your closet.

“You promised,” he reminded teasingly.

“I remember,” you rolled your eyes, but opened the door and led him in. He stepped in slowly, taking in every inch of very organized racks of clothes, shoes, and accessories with his eyes, which was a lot of inches.

“This closet is literally the size of my living room. My clothes would only fill one rack. Oh, I want this amount of nice clothes,” Roger said wistfully, running his hands across the racks.

“You know, I could help with that, for a small price,” you said with a smile.

“Are you thinking… sex? Because I’m already feeling like your sugar baby with the coat immediately turning into us hooking up,” Roger said and you could not tell if he was joking.

A look of amused shock took over your face as your eyes went wide and your jaw dropped, “I was thinking more like you keep helping me with my own shopping so I focus on finding the best things instead of buying everything in the store, thank you very much.”

“Oh,” Roger said with a sheepish smile.

“And excuse you, ‘immediately turning into us hooking up?’ it’s not like I jumped you in the store!” you said, pushing his shoulder.

“Well, you kind of did jump me,” he countered, stepping in front of you and placing his hands on your waist. You scoffed, not touching him. So he took your hands and put them on his shoulders, placing his back on your waist. You pretended to be mad and looked away, not making any move to separate yourself from him.

Roger leaned closer, only a few inches from your face, “I was gonna say that I wouldn't mind being your sugar baby, it’s a pretty sweet deal.”

“Shut up,” you said with a laugh, looking at him, and he did. “It’s a sweet deal for you because you get stuff and sex. I can get sex from anyone, the only payment worth it from you is your sense of style.”

“Well then I’ll happily pay with that,” Roger nodded. He smiled and you rolled your eyes at his absurdity, but let him press his lips to yours in a kiss that made up for it.

★★★

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#so they hook up instead of sleeping together bc I couldn't do 11k I just couldn't #anyway sub!rog is the best and I had so much fun writing him #hope y'all enjoy!!!!#queen #roger taylor #fic #oneshot #the best things ain't free #queenmylovely #smut #roger taylor x reader #queen x reader #roger meddows taylor #roger meddows taylor x reader #rog #sub!rog

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yumehoxo · 3 years

Text

Convinced -eren x reader

⚠️Warning this story contains mature content!⚠️ (Substance use, alcohol, sexual content, strong language) All characters are 18 or older

*Ding*

"Ughhh how much more fucking annoying can you get?" You think to yourself. It was 12:03 pm, and Connie won't stop texting you. Every since break started all you have been doing, is staying home, watching Netflix, getting high as fuck, eat, then fall asleep. (As you should be). Your roommate was not home yet since last night when she said she was going to a "get-together" with some friends, and Connie wouldn't stop texting you about the party he went to last night. "Why can't they all just leave me alone??!! A bitch gotta get some me-time." You thought, "it's not like I want to go out in this cold weather anyway, tch". You walk over to your bathroom which surprisingly not as messy, except the bottles of soap sitting around your sink and an occasional Plan b packet or two. "This bitch needs to stop taking my Plan b, what if I need that later... who am I kidding as if I'm going to need it, i don't plan on hooking up with anyone anytime soon!" You said to yourself.

You start fixing your bathroom, throwing away all the empty bottles and astray swishers, you take all the useless tissues lying on the floor and throw them all into the bin to take out to the trash cans in front of your complex. You don't complain about where you live..."it's nice and quiet and the people here are-" The door slams open. "OMG Y/N YOU WILL NEVER GUESS WHAT HAPPENED!" Shouted your roommate, Alessia. She was a pretty, pale skin toned girl, with green eyes, and huge tits. You often find yourself thinking.."I would low key hook up with her if she wasn't a disgusting, annoying, loud bitch". But you still respected her she'd always help you with whatever you going through, and she was surprisingly really smart. You thought of her as more of an irresponsible older sister than a roommate. You can hear footsteps rushing to your bathroom door, and the door finally slam open, "OMG girl- you will NEVER guess what happened last night" Alessia half screamed. Her hair was a mess and she was holding her heels in one hand and phone in the other. "So I went to this party last night with my friends and I met this SUPERRRR HOT guy, his name was Jean and we ended up hooking up and he asked for my number and I have a date tomorrow with him" she squealed, she was so happy you could've sworn you saw sparkles shimmer though her eyes...then it hit you... "DID YOU JUST SAY JEAN?!" You basically shouted at her with a look of surprise written all over your face. "yeah I did... whyyyyy, how do you know him?" she said sharply to you. You swallowed hard and said to her... "we dated for all of high school, I mean we never actually had sex but he gave me head, vice-versa" you said while lighting a blunt. "girl- no fucking way, should I cancel the date? If you want me to I will!" She said with a concerned look on her face. "Nahh, I don't really give a fuck, not like it was anything serious" you said as you exhaled smoke from your mouth as the familiar tingly sense you get from smoking hits you. "Awww, are you sure I feel bad now!" Alessia exclaimed. "Bitch I just said I don't care, now get the fuck out of my bathroom and go get your self cleaned up" you say while opening the window to get some fresh air. "Okayyy~ thank you love, also your should go out more I haven't seen you leave the house once except to go get food and pick up weed from your plug, I'm really concerned about you.." Alessia said with a look of desperation. "Girl that is none of your business , if you keep on talking I'll take back what I said about your date with Jean earlier." You stated coldly to her flicking off excess ashes from you blunt. "Nooo-noooooooo don't do that, fine I'll leave you aloneeee!" She said in a whiny tone, as you heard her stumble off to her room and slam the door shut.

"Just when I thought I was going to get some peace and quiet" you said to yourself rolling your eyes. You picked up your phone and FaceTimed Connie, ready to chew him out for waking you up. As the line trilled you turned on your shower to wait for the the hit water to come. "YOOOOO Y/N! Why didn't you answer my texts??" Connie shouted through the phone causing you to lower your volume. "Because I was fucking asleep jackass and you woke me up-" "Why are your eyes so red?" Connie interrupted you, "I swear imma kill that little mother fucker one day" you thought to yourself, clearly irritated. "Why is it any if your business?" You responded back to Connie. "Because I'm your best friendddd" he replied back in a singy-songey voice. "How many times have I told you to lay off the weed?" Connie asked in a matter of fact tone. "Clearly not enough" you said back in a bratty attitude ,blowing smoke straight to the camera. "Yooo pass me some" Connie joked with you , " I'm too broke to buy any weed since I'm too busy buying Sasha food" he said with a pouty expression. " Awww how cute, I wish I had a bf like youuu" you said in an almost pouty, yet cold way. "If you want to find someone like that then you should go to more parties, they're are plenty of guys who would want to do that for you, I haven't seen one guy who hasn't wanted you whenever we go out." Connie said. "Hmmm maybe I will.." you said to Connie. You could see his whole face light up "WAIT ARE YOU FRL? YOU'LL ACTUALLY COME TO A PARTY?!" Connie asked excitedly. "Yeah sure why not, it's just like I have anything better to do anyways" you shrugged. " Yeh for real, your such a homebody" Connie joked with you. "Yeah I really am- OH SHIT MY SHOWER I GOT TO GO CONNIE BYEEEE" you ended the phone and hopped right in. The comforting feeling of the warm water hitting your bare back made you feel like you never wanted to leave. You washed you hair and body, shaved your legs, and exfoliated your skin. As you got out of the shower you wrapped your towel around you realizing your didn't bring clothes into the bathroom and you have to go to your room. You took a bra and panties set you bought from VS and put it on. You put lotion in your skin and did your facial routine, you never needed much makeup anyway since you were natural beauty, but you never admitted it. You threw on a pair of tight black sports shorts and a mesh crop top to go with it. You snapped a mirror pic making sure to get all of your curves into the photo and sent it as you streaks for the day. "Wow I can't believe I'm going to go to a party after so many months..." you thought to yourself.

*Ding*

Connie:

-Yo imma pick you up at around 7:30-ish to be ready.

"Ughh I hope I'm making the right decision”.

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AUTHORS NOTE:

Y'all this is my first time writing a Fanfic so please don't kill me if it's not good 😭😭.

If y'all could please tell me any suggestions, or errors I made I would greatly appreciate it 🤧

Anyway love y'all muah. 🥰💞✨

#eren yeager smut #anime #eren x reader #x reader #aot x reader #x female reader #modern au #aot modern au #tonguepiercing

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queensgaybeach1d · 4 years

Note

HELLOOO, I just discovered your blog, shame on me. So, I read your masterpost about the stunts in the industry (great work btw) and was wondering how to tell if something is real or purely pr. Would you mind giving me a few pointers ?? Answer however and whenever you can.

Hello Sweetie,

Thank you so much for your lovely words. I would love to help you dig deeper into the PR industry. In fact, I did some research myself and I stumbled upon a great confirmation on how everything works. I think it is just the right fit for you, sweetheart.

Please take your time reading the post and if you have any questions or suggestions, please do not hesitate to ask me. Have a great day and enjoy!

Kisses,

Suman 😊

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How to spot a PR relationship?!

This post is made for everyone who would like to learn how to spot a fake relationship in Hollywood. This information is supported by a very reliable source. The name of the source is Jack Ketsoyan, he set up two PR relationships himself. If you would try to compare this to your favourite Hollywood couple, you might be surprised of the outcome. I wish you all the best while reading this and if you have any questions/suggestions please do not hesitate to ask. Enjoy! :)

This is the link of the podcast about the PR relationships (skip to 5.40). I will make a little summary of the very important things Jack said. There is also another man who is speaking about this subject. His name is Christopher and he is a lawyer who has worked with cases like these for a long time.

(Please note that I am in no way hating on anyone. I have a strong dislike for all ‘’beards’’, but what they do with their lives is their responsibility. Therefore I mean no harm to any of these people. It would be very sad if any of these people would do it because they needed money for their families. If that was the case I would truly feel sorry for them, but the thing is they want to become famous by dating someone else who put his/her hard work in his/her career. That it just not fair. There are plenty of ways to become famous by dedication, hard work and staying yourself.)

I want to give compliments to the lovely @Totallylost4you on twitter. She made me aware of the podcast.

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-’’To hide the artist’s sexuality; boosting of the careers.’’ --> (Louis, Harry, Zayn, Liam and Niall. Also, Kristen Stewart, Cara Delevigne and Taylor Swift) -->

‘’It is more common on the male side than on the female side. There are certain celebrities who were, back in the day, in the closet and it was not okay to be out. We live in a completely different time nowadays, these days being gay is okay. So back in the day that was the biggest secret, it was a big taboo, if a certain high profiled male, the heartthrob is all of a sudden gay, they were not going to get the bigger roles anymore. They were going to be type casted, so that was the big way of hiding things. Them hiding their sexuality was dating a female who would keep them in the limelight basically and cover it up.’’ [about closeting] ‘’Times have changed, it still happens, but a lot has changed.’’ --> There are still people who would not like attending a Harry Styles (the heartthrob) concert when he comes out as gay.

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-’’To be able to sell the hype of it.’’ --> (Whenever a picture of Taylor and Tom or Louis and Eleanor comes out, people are quick to retweet, post and talk about what happened. Within no time the pictures have traveled through the internet. Which automatically means that a lot of people have seen it. All of this gives the label/couple/artist attention and money. --> Whether it is bad attention or good attention, attention means money.) a few examples of these couples are also: Haylor, Zigi and Elounor.

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-’’To sell tickets to concerts or movies.’’ --> 1D world tours and solo tours. That is also why beards like Camille Rowe, Eleanor Calder and Maya Henry attend their concerts. As for movies think about Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart (who is gay) fake dating, moments after Twilight came out. Think about 1D bringing their fake girlfriends to the world premiere and Zayn and Perrie getting engaged a second after. The purpose of these events are attention. Sweethearts, whenever people go to these shows/movies all they will focus on is 1D and their ‘girlfriends’. Photos will spread faster than ever and people will talk about how ‘real’ they are. Their aim is to kill two birds with one stone; making them look like a ‘real’ couple whilst promoting their movie/album.

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-’’To sell albums.’’ --> (Zigi, Chiam, Elounor, Hamille, Nailee, Haylor.) Let us be honest, are they not the biggest reasons why antis buy the album? Just to see what stuff they write about their fake girlfriends/boyfriends. Just to see how ‘Camille’ pronounces ‘’Coucou’’or just because Gigi Hadid starred in Zayn’s music video. Or maybe to finally know the ‘truth’ about Taylor’s fake relationships.

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-’’It's all about the hype at the moment. Especially with the social media world.’’ --> I am going to point out an important thing Jack said. He said ‘’especially with the social media world.’’ Remember when there were only rumours of Louis and Eleanor being back together? The whole fandom tweeted about it. This made it popular and that was the solid moment 1D’s label knew that Elounor 2.0 would do it for them. They would earn a lot by it. The same thing counts for Zigi, Chiam, Haylor, Hamille. Hamille is a good example too. When all of you heard that Harry wrote a song about her and that her voice was going to be included in his song, what happened? Exactly, everyone went nuts and made sure to listen to that exact song. That is exactly what they want. They want that power over you, that is what gives them the money. Another example, how fast do you think solo Zayn stans and Directioners tweeted about a ‘power couple’ when the news broke that Zayn and Gigi are ‘expecting a child’? How fast did people open their social media accounts when Kylie Jenner was pregnant for the Kardashian’s 10th anniversary? (Social media does A LOT. Whenever a picture of Eleanor (beard) and Clifford (Louis’ dog) arrives on the internet, people automatically assume they are together in a room. This, is not the case. That is how convenient social media is to arranged relationships. Why start a rumour by hiring newspapers instead of posting a message on social media? It is much cheaper and more people will know about it in less than four hours.)

Promoting certain brand like Coca Cola (Elounor), YSL, Gucci, Vogue (Zigi) and Hugo Boss are also a part of it. Celebrities wearing those brands make their fans want to buy it too, think of the Kardashians promoting Adidas and other expensive brands. Also think of people like Briana Jungwirth promoting flat tummy tea. This is called ‘celebrity branding.’

Tell me, how many times do you get HQ pic of your PR couple on your phone? People tend to go out of their mind when pictures come out. That is the immediate effect Hollywood has on social media/ you. That gives them the promo they need, even during quarantine the beards post pictures of themselves, making you think they are together when in reality they are not. :)

{About why Jack hooked an arranged relationship up himself} --> ‘’It was more of a mutual agreement between the agents. {Tells a story about an actor getting bad reviews for a movie and in order to let people focus on something else they got the actor a girl, so the media would focus on the girl instead of the bad movie.}’’ --> ‘’Just a one year deal. Basically they finished of the press and the international press and then they went their separate ways, because she did not want to do a two year deal.’’ {interviewer asks if it worked} --> ‘’It worked.’’ --> A few examples of (approximately) a one-year deal: Calvin Harris and Taylor Swift, Niall Horan and Hailee Steinfield and Louis Tomlinson and Danielle Campbell. It is also good to point out that the beard can decide whether she wants to continue or not, but the celebrity has to do what the agent arranges.

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{Interviewer asks what reasons people might have to agree to one of these PR relationships} --> Different reasons, that could be to deflect attention away from a controversy (damage control. think of something Larry or Ziam related happening and the next day Zigi and Elouno are papped. Or fans finding out Louis is in the same country as Harry and the next day they will let Elouno do a pap walk. Another example is when Ziammies find out a Zigi picture is photoshopped, the next day you will see Zigi in person. This happens when their stunts fail). So if an actor has drugs and alcohol problems they may want to give the appearance that they have settled down and are in a committed relationships so that they can banked for films. Or they are going to be able to get bonded and get work and people will trust them, because they have settled down. It also could be done to create a brand. Two celebs getting together and 'now there's this tremendous interest about them being a power couple.' [...] We create strong provision against the disclosure of any negative facts against the celebrity - with consequences. So these agreements need to be structured with a hold back of money so that over time if they have complied with the agreement and not disclosed ehh no personal information and violation the agreement then they would be entitled the payment, so under the agreement. " --> The last part might be difficult to understand, because the lawyer uses difficult words, but what he is actually saying is very important. He says if the celebrities who are in the PR relationship have done their part (parading around with each other) then they will receive their money (please correct me if I am wrong). The host also confirmed that contracts like these are the reason why a lot of celebrities do not admit they had a PR relationships.

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Clues on how to spot a PR relationship:

-‘’The main clue you would see is if, you know, a certain high profiled male is dating a female (or when a high profiled female is dating a regular male), who was not high profile. All of a sudden, she is, overnight, the most talked about girl in Hollywood and everyone want a piece of them. That is the biggest thing, you know, it is such a career boost for the female that some females end up taking the deal.’’ --> Zigi, Elounor, Chiam, Brouis, Haylor, Taylor and Calvin. How does the world know Eleanor Calder? Because of Louis Tomlinson. No one knew her before, except her family. How did Gigi gain so many followers? Because she started dating Zayn Malik. Gigi already had a platform for herself, but she gained a lot of followers by dating Zayn. Zayn also gained followers by dating Gigi. Gigi needed promo and Zayn was in the spotlight, because he just ‘left 1D.’ This made him the perfect target. I hope all of you also notice that when beards/fake girlfriends post pictures of them with their fake boyfriend, it gets way more likes than their usual pictures.

{What was the benefit for the girl in the scenario?} --> ‘’Ehm, she has a huge career at the moment. She benefit from that by becoming a household name (someone that is well known) and getting bigger roles than she would have. She would use to be the 3rd or the 4th lead in any auditions or any jobs that she was getting. She then became the first lead. She got a great career boost out of it, for sure.’’ --> Gigi Hadid, Eleanor Calder, Sophia Smith, Cheryl Cole, Maya, Camille Rowe and Kendall Jenner are just a few examples.

How did the world know Townes? Because ‘Harry named’ her in one of his songs. How did the world know about Maya Henry? Because Liam Payne started dating her. Before this, she was just a fan. How did Cheryl Cole get the attention back? Because of baby gate and by fake dating Liam Payne. How did Briana gain so many followers? Because Louis Tomlinson fans gave her the attention and because she participated in faking a pregnancy. How did Shawn and Camilla become a couple in the spotlight? Because people have always shipped them, ever since the beginning and their label gave the fans what they wanted. How did Kim Kardashian become famous? A *** tape of her and Ray J leaked and she became famous. Now, she is a lot richer and more famous than he is. A quick note, not many people know how Kim Kardashian became famous. They only really know her from Keeping Up With The Kardashians. The newer generation does not know about the tape scandal, and that is what they do. You need to dig a little deeper to see that. This all is an on-going cycle and it will not stop unless we all stop believing it. 😊

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What do they do in order to make a PR relationship look real?

{Interviewer asks what the clauses in an arranged relationships contract are} --> ‘’An arranged relationship is estranged by definition. So certainly we are going to see requests that are equally odd. They are certainly going to have requirements as to how they hold themselves out to the public as a couple. This would mean appearances at award shows, parties or events together as a couple and that there would be requirements maybe for specific events.’’ --> Eleanor attending Jay’s wedding and being ‘maid of honor’, Calvin and Taylor at Award shows, Elounor at the fashions show 2013, Haylor and their NYE ‘kiss’, Zigi at the MET gala and Chiam at the Brits, celebs at after parties with their ‘girlfriends’. All of these couples have also pictures with each other’s family members. That made a lot of you think they are close and real, well my loves, now you finally know that it is all part of a PR stunt. The fake girlfriends also have to look supportive, that is why they have to be there at concerts, soccer matches, award shows etcetera. 😊

Remember when Eleanor (beard) posted a picture of herself and in the background you could see a picture of her and Louis in 2012 and ‘Louis’ written on a board? Remember when she posted a picture of herself with her and Louis’ boots in the background in 2018? All of these things are there to make it look like they truly live together and that they truly own each other’s stuff. The same thing counts for Haylor’s airplane necklace. Do you genuinely think they did that by accident? No, that is the purpose of the whole picture. 😊

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‘’Then there is going to be particularly some none disclosure issues surrounding them as to what cannot be said about the relationship and what needs to be said. There could be a script even as to what they have to say if asked about the relationships. There would be photo sessions showing them as a couple. And then I have seen issues of sexual relationships and specific whether this would happen or not happen in an agreement. But if it is truly a PR relationships then sex would not be a part of that relationship, because it is not real.’’ --> Loves, do you remember a moment when someone asked a celebrity about his/her relationships and they stuttered and looked uncomfortable, or they just said something wrong or embarrassing or tried to talk themselves out of it? Well, that happens when you have to make up stuff that never happened. Louis Tomlinson confirmed his interviews are scripted, so this one is just an extra thick layer of confirmation. I also recall Gigi doing a live and someone asked about Zayn and she just stuttered and looked away, not knowing how to answer a question. (I think there have definitely been times when two people who were in an arranged relationship gave different answers to the same question, why? Because they do not know anything about each other.) Here is an example of a moment that is repeated and scripted about Louis’ ‘relationship’ with Eleanor, even know we have legit proof that is not what happened:

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Now I can hear all your lovely brains working and thinking whether a celebrity is willing to sign a contract like that or if their label is making them sign it. Well, if you have read my previous masterpost about the music industry you can see confirmations of the label making the artist their puppet. They own you, so if they think you should have a girlfriend to hide gay rumours then they will give you one. ‘A label cannot force you anything’, but it does make you sign a contract. When you sign the contract without reading it carefully, then your label will mess you up. In those contracts they do not write ‘’Taylor Swift has to agree to arranged relationships.’’ They write stuff like ‘’When signing the contract, Taylor Swift allows the label to make changes in order to get her to fame.’’ Of course Taylor (and other artists) would think that they mean changing her outfit and looks, but no. The label thinks being gay is something that will not get people enough fame. So what do they do? They change her, they change her sexuality. They closet her and even though Taylor and other LGBTQ artists do not want that. You cannot deny because when you do so, the label will show you the contract you signed. A contract like that is never written literally, they can manipulate their words. To the label ‘’being gay or a part of the LGBTQ+ community’’ falls under ‘’making changes’’ in order to make her famous. Of course there are celebrities who willingly closet themselves for various reasons. I hope to create a single post about how devious these contracts are for you all! 😊

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Here are a few things I hope you have learned from this: 😊

- Fake relationships still exist and they will always exist. It has been confirmed, so no one can deny this anymore.

- The girl and boy have to go to special events, such as award shows, family dinners and weddings in order to make it look real.

- Homophobia is still a thing and the biggest reason why arranged relationships exist.

- The beard has a contract too, so your idol has no say in how long she can or cannot stay. If she does good then she will stay. (I see many people say that Louis chose Eleanor because they are friends and that is why she is back, but he actually has no say in anything. Your idol is their product to sell. Your idol is basically a marionette.)

-The PR team does everything to make it look like they are truly together, think of photos of each other in each other’s homes and ‘personal gifts.’

-Celebrities get an enormous boost on their social media accounts when they start being part of an arranged relationship. Something I have always thought was a bit odd, is the fact that Eleanor never created an insta account until her and Louis’ ‘relationship’ had its peak; in the middle of June 2012. When in reality, insta was created in 2010. She also created twitter in 2012. Exactly when the first few big events were attended by them. (I genuinely think she did that, because everyone wanted to see more of her. Plus, she has always wanted to be a fashion blogger and this was her ‘big moment’ to do so.)

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The credits for this post go to @Totallylost4you. They made me aware of the podcast and they continue to shine light on hidden treasures like this one. They also hardly get credits for their solid hard work and I hope they will continue doing this! Thank you!

Thank you so much for your attention. If you have any question/suggestion, please do not hesitate to ask/tell me! I wish all of you the best and please stay safe. Have an amazing day!

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aealzx · 3 years

Photo

I’m going to put this one under the cut juuuust in case |D There’s a bit of mention of gorey stuff, and things that might be uncomfortable to some about Vanitas’ time with Xehanort and scientists.

I just realized when I was going through pics that I haven’t drawn Vanitas in awhile. So I wanted to draw him again, and ended up focusing on one of his therapy sessions, if they could be called that. |D I dunno anything about proper therapy, could never fine any psychiatrists that weren’t just “how did that make you feel?” or laughed at me.

“What would YOU know of my life Valentine? Did you live through it? You’ve spoken to me for four years already, but what does it matter? How can you hope to sympathize with something you’ve never experienced? Is this fun for you? To pick me apart with words much like those men cut my arms to see if I still bleed like a human.”

The sessions were starting to go downhill again. It was a struggle each time, for Vincent could never figure out what triggered them. Lacing his fingers in front of him, Vincent just watched Vanitas shout at him, refusing to make any sudden movements that might startle the boy and giving some time for him to calm down a little. “I’m aware of some of what happened to you and Ventus, Vanitas. But my goal here is not to try to empathize with you. It’s to help you come to terms with something affecting you in ways you refuse to admit. I hold no joy in your distress.”

“HA!” Vanitas barked, shifting into one of his moods where he preferred to laugh rather than shrink away. “Hahahaha, you pretend this is for my sake, as if I don’t know it’s all for you. You who had the tragic son you wish you could save. An abomination that murdered some poor bloke’s mother, I’ve heard all about it. You think by helping me you can save him? It doesn’t work that way. I have to be someone worthy of saving in the first place.”

“You don’t think you’re worthy?” Vincent asked, expertly keeping his voice level despite the prodding from Vanitas about his own past.

“Pff, don’t care. I’m not looking for some dumb redemption change or whatever,” Vanitas answered, making quotes in the air with his fingers in mocking. “I’m happy the way I am. Don’t want to deal with your light bullsh-.”

“You’re happy being here in a mental ward, without freedom to do as you please? Happy to be unable to sleep at night because of nightmares? Not being able to see the brother you cherish so dee-”

“And having some person here constantly badgering me about stuff that doesn’t matter?” Vanitas interrupted. “It’s not much different, actually. The only difference is that the cage doesn’t have bars, but a wooden door and walls. And the doctors don’t stab with knives, but with their words instead. You’re not so different, Doctor. Just because blood doesn’t actually run down your hands like the others.”

This time Vincent remained quiet, just watching Vanitas over his own fingers as the boy sagged down to lean back on the plush chair again. He watched Vincent carefully for a moment, before giving him a slight smirk.

“You know, there was this one kid there. Cut open his chest just to watch his heart beat. Dm dm. Dm dm,” Vanitas explained, placing his hands on his chest and pulling out slightly, then flaring them in rhythm to a heartbeat. “Just bleed on the floor, they didn’t care. Maybe they could see what was wrong just by looking with their eyes. ‘Course it didn’t work. Had to stitch him back up, and I dunno what happened after that. Not like I cared. The ones that cried and whined for mommy and daddy got the beatings. But if you gave the beatings instead.... They liked the fighters. Sometimes they’d let me out, if I beat up the other kids for them. Keep them in line.”

“.....It’s common for people to do terrible things in the mind of self preservation. You felt threatened, so you performed actions that would keep your captors from harming you. The fault lies with them.”

“Even for the girl I chose to shoot on my own?” Vanitas asked, a smile splitting his face when Vincent’s fingers twitched. “You know, we actually got out once. Some do gooder hero broke us out of the cells. But then there were the bodyguards behind us, chasing the little girl with pigtails as she ran with Ventus. She wasn’t going to get anywhere like that, dragging his half functioning body around. So when they caught up to us I took their gun… and I shot her, for being so stupid. That should have taught her a lesson for ruining everything I built up. Her and the other guy. Can’t say I know what happened to them, for they took us back soon enough.”

Vincent had to keep himself from reacting too much to the new revelation. He already knew that Vanitas had helped beat the other kids, but this was the first time he’d ever heard of them having a failed rescue attempt. And Vanitas claimed he’d shot a little girl? Had it been a dream, or had it actually happened? “Why would you hinder their attempt to help you?”

“Why would you ask me that, Doctor? I thought that was your job to figure out,” Vanitas responded, jaw resting on his fist. “And I think you’ll have plenty of time for that. I’m sure our session is over now.”

“I can extend it if necessary,” Vincent countered, not liking how Vanitas was avoiding the question. It was just a guess at this point, but Vincent was sure that Vanitas avoided content that made him feel like there was something more behind his actions than senseless violence.

“Don’t make me call the nurses in here,” Vanitas threatened, eyes narrowing. “I’m sure I could use the nap. Apparently I don’t sleep well after all.”

Vincent tensed, but inevitably let out a sigh in relent. He’d rather not have Vanitas attack him for the countless time just to have nurses rush in to sedate him. “Very well, Vanitas. We’ll pick this up next week. As usual.”

#my art #kingdom hearts #khau #htau #hreat transplant au #vanitas #angry boy #mention of gore #I guess #nothing detailed

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sharperthewriter · 3 years

Text

Chapter 3 of Possible-y Utah

Chapter 3 - Surprising the DrsP

(45 minutes later)

Kim looked around and saw that only 20 students still remained in the gym.

"Um...where did everyone go?" she asked.

"Maybe it's getting a bit late." Ron answered.

"Late..." Kim muttered to herself and then she gasped.

(Flashback, Six Hours Ago)

James cleared his throat and exclaimed, "Let's get a few things clear right up front."

Eric, without hesitation, replied "Oh, you read my mind, sir. Now, Kim explained that her

normal curfew is 10 o'clock but on special occasions and

rescue missions, you extend that to 11. I'd feel better

if we stick with 10."

(End Flashback)

"Rufus?!" Kim exclaimed.

Rufus came out onto the table and saluted.

"What time is it on the Kimmunicator?" she asked.

Rufus got out Kim's Kimmunicator from her handbag. It read the time: 12:18am.

Kim gasped, "Oh no!"

"What is it, KP?" Ron questioned, alert.

"I promised Dad that we would be back by 11pm and it's after midnight!" Kim exclaimed, "Oh no...he's definitely going to kill me for sure! I'll just send him a text on my phone, letting him know that me and Ron will be back at the house!"

"And there's the other little thing..." Ron interrupted her.

"Ron...must you compile the sitch a bit more?" Kim groaned.

"Sorry about that, Kim. How are we going to get a ride home?" Ron said. "We used the last bit of your brother's rocket fuel to get from BN HQ to the gym."

Kim then looked at Jessica, Monique and Tara on the table.

"Awww...you aren't coming to the post-prom party at my house? It has plenty of room!" Jessica insisted.

"Sorry, Jess." Kim replied, "I gotta get home to the 'rents. Maybe when Senior Prom comes around, we can do that."

"Okay, sounds like a good idea." Jessica replied.

"And I came in one of the stretch limos." Monique added.

"So that pretty much leaves Tara." Kim replied, eyeing the blonde's set of car keys.

"I got my drive's license last week, so I'll be more than happy to drive you two back to Mr. Possible's house!" Tara insisted on the request.

"Then that sitch has been settled!" Kim said, "It's been a long night for me and Ron and we do need to get back home."

(35 minutes later)

Tara's car drove the couple back up to the Possible house, which still had the FEMA-blue tarp on its roof from the Diablos.

"Thanks for the emergency ride, Tara!" Kim smiled with Ron in the backseat, wrapping his arm around her back. He also put his baby blue prom coat, around Kim's shoulders.

"A bon-diggety ride, to be exact!" Ron agreed.

Tara replied with a grin, "It's the least I can do, Kim, after you saved my puppy from the storm drain a couple weeks ago!"

"So not the drama, Tara! I always help people in need!" Kim agreed.

"Night, Kim. I'll probably see you on Monday at chemistry class." Tara said, putting her hands on the steering wheel.

"Same here!" Kim said. Both she and Ron got out of the back of the car.

Tara started up the car and drove out into the dark of the night.

"So...ready to break the news to your 'rents?" Ron asked, offering his hand.

"You know I am more than ready, Ron, even though I am probably going to be grounded for being late due to...you know...all that's happened tonight." Kim said, taking a deep breath, and grabbing Ron's hand.

The two, holding hands, walked up to the front door of the house. Ron knocked on the door three times.

The door slowly opened, showing James.

"Hello, you two!" James said before opening the door fully, showing them holding hands.

He paused for a moment at this sight and said, "I guess I have a great many questions to ask."

"You do, Dad. Where is Mom, by the way?" Kim asked.

"She is in the den, Kimmie-cub."

"OK, sounds good!" _

(12:56am)

The couple and James all walked into the den where Ann was waiting for them. She was in her teddy bear pajamas and bunny slippers.

When she saw both Kim and Ron holding hands, her eyes widened with joy and she began to squeal.

"James! You have to check this out! Kimberly and Ron are..."

"Yep, Mom! Me and Ron are officially BF and GF!" Kim proclaimed. "And I won as Junior Prom Queen!" she added, pointing to her crown and sash

"I'm very excited for you!" Ann exclaimed "Did you manage to get your first kiss?"

"Actually, Mom, we did! Monique was the one who took the pic!" Kim grinned, taking out her digital camera from her handbag. She scrolled the about 60 pictures she took during the dance. She got to the one where Kim and Ron kissed for the first time.

"Awwww...you two are so sweet in that pic!" Ann smiled.

"I totally like this!" James exclaimed, seeing the photo with satisfaction.

Then something came to his mind.

"What happened with Eric?" he asked.

"Ron, should we give him the long version or the short version?" Kim questioned to her new BF.

Ron and Rufus yawned and were rubbing their eyes. "Me and Rufus are about to crash."

"So short version of the sitch it is." Kim replied. "As it turned out, Dad, Eric was nothing more than a fake."

"We both meant that very literally..." Ron interjected.

"He was a Synthodrone created by Drakken to keep me distracted from his Diablo plot." Kim explained.

"And as it turned out, he was a liar too!" Ron exclaimed. "He claimed that he liked naked mole rats!"

Rufus then chittered angrily.

"Eric got a taste of his own medicine." Kim smirked, "Rufus bit him and he shriveled up like a prune with the scrambler in his hands. Destroyed the tower as well!"

"So Drakken not only managed to steal the Hepheastus project for those toys, he also nearly broke my daughter's heart?!" James growled, raising his fist at the blue tarp covering his roof.

"Yes, but thankfully, when the chips were down and I nearly gave up, Ron 'fessed his feelings for me!" Kim smiled, "And thanks to him, we stopped Drakken's scheme once and for all!"

"That's very good to hear." James said, "Now I think we should all go to bed. It is past 1 in the morning."

Kim then yawned, "Agreed, Dad!"

"I guess I'm going to be heading back to the ol' Stoppable abode!" Ron said.

"But first, a little good-night kiss for the road!" Kim grinned, giving Ron a kiss on the lips.

"Night, KP! This has been the best night of both our lives!" Ron replied with a wide smile across his face.

"You can say that again, Ron!" Kim giggled.

(20 minutes later)

Kim, now alone in her bedroom, began to yawn.

"Now...time for sleep..."

But before she could get into her bed, both Jim and Tim appeared.

Jim began, "Hey Kim, did you get..."

"...infected by the cootie monster?" Tim finished.

"No, I haven't, Tweebs!" Kim muttered, "And shouldn't you two be in bed by now?"

"It's the weekend! We usually stay..." Jim began

And Tim finished, "...up later than usual!"

"Now if you don't mind, we are..." Jim then began his next sentence,

"...going to work on our inventions." Tim added.

"I have the earplugs on standby just in case." Kim said, pointing to the earplugs on her nightstand. "Oh and Tweebs..."

Jim and Tim stopped for a moment at what their sister was about to say.

"Thanks for helping me and Ron out back there!" she said with a smile to the two. "Now good night!"

With that, the Tweebs left her behind and Kim turned out the lights, reflecting on the most eventful night of her life.

#kim possible #fanfiction #possible-y utah #ron stoppable #kim x ron #james possible #the tweebs #ann possible #tara #jessica #jim possible #tim possible

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armallo-and-roul · 3 years

Text

“Just Because”

Starring Roul and Ia ( @ia-bi-tia ) enjoy!

*BUZZ BUZZ* It was 2 am when Roul heard his phone go off, waking him in a daze. I’ll just ignore it. No one needs me rn. But apparently someone did, for the texts turned into a phone call. Roul sloppily reached for his phone, momentarily blinded by the bright blue light against the pitch black room. After his eyes adjusted, he realized it said Ia and the cute selfie they took for his contact picture of them was up on the screen. Failing to swipe the answer the first time, he quickly swore before getting it the next time. “Hello Ia, is everything alright?” Roul half mumbled into the phone.

More under the cut because wow I wrote a lot.

“Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Woul. Let’s go stargazing on the dorm roof!!” He could easily hear Ia’s energy and apparent lack of feeling tired. “Why?” Ia excitingly answered back “just because.” He hated to tell them no, but damn he was tired. “I’m already in bed, baby. Why don’t you just come over and cuddle up against me. We’ll watch a vid of stars instea-“ but Ia had already interjected with “NO! I WANNA SEE THEM IRL. With myyy star.” Ia poured as much sweetness as possible into their voice. “Alright, baby. By the time you get here I should be ready-“ But the door was already opening, Ia scurrying inside. Roul let out an impressed gasp as he turned his lamp on. “You little gremlin!! You knew I’d say yes. Get over here.” He finished with a playful grunt, patting his bed. He saw them happily bite their tongue and hurry over, leaning in to give him a kiss. He sat up in the bed to wrap his arms around their slim waist. “C’mon sleepy head!!! Those stars won’t be there forever!! Don’t make me get your clothes” Ia went over to his wardrobe. Roul knew what they were about to do as they turned their head to him, mischief plain as day on their face. He quickly bounded out of bed and hurried over to it, saving his clothes from being tossed out if they had to pick his outfit. “You really know how to get me to do anything, don’t you?” Ia wrapped their arms around him, thrumming. “Uh huhhhh!!! I sure do. Oh no not that. This! And this! And this!” Roul looked at them, confused. “Why does my outfit matter if we’re stargazing?” Ia danced their fingers over Roul’s bare chest. “Just because.” He laughed lightly, shaking his head and going along with them. After he was dressed and hair fixed, he grabbed his Diana camera before being pulled out the door with Ia.

They climbed the staircase hand in hand until they reached the top, Ia quickly blocking the door with their slight frame. They sure are acting different tonight. “Okay, bunny boy, I may have lied about wanting to stargaze “just because”. I wanted to surprise youuuuu.” Roul was definitely confused until Ia opened the roof access door. On part of the roof was a topless gazebo of sorts, strung with countless lights twinkling in the dark. In the middle was a tarp covering something lumpy. “Oh fuck hold on.” They darted over, ripping off the tarp to reveal very pretty cushions, pillows, and blankets. “Ia, sweetie, this is beautiful. Did you do all this for us?” Ia laughed, shoulders raising as they scurried back to him. “Oh no, I’m too scrawny to manage that! Some of the art kids had photography sessions up here. And I just happen to be friends with this installations owner. They said as long as we don’t destroy it AND replace the tarp, we could use it for a couple hours. SO COME ON!!” Ia tugged at Roul’s arm.

“So this is why you wanted me to wear nice clothes. I thought you were just bored and wanted us to dress up.” Ia nodded along. “That’s believable. But no, we’re going to take some fucking cute ass pictures because we’re a cute ass couple and the world needs to KNOW!!” Roul let out a small gasp. “You. You said the c-word.” Ia looked at him quickly, confused. “I didn’t call anyone a cunt.” Roul shook his head as he pulled them into an embrace. “No, you called us a couple.” They had been PLENTY intimate for the weeks they’d known each other, but neither had made it official, until now. Ia’s mouth went wide. “I guess I did say couple.. do... you wanna make things official? IT’SOKAYIFYOUDONTWANTTO. I’LLUNDERSTAND-“ Roul placed a finger to their lips, calming them. “I would be more than happy to make things official and call you my partner, and I your boyfriend.” He pulled them into a kiss, letting physical touch replace what they may have been unable to put into words. After their kiss broke, Ia let out a wild giggle. “I’m dating an absolute huuuuUUUUuuunk.” Roul laughed in unison with them, before pulling them into another kiss.

“Okieee there’s a tripod we can set your phone in and take these cute pics! You lay down so I can test where to put the phone.” Once Ia got the frame adjusted, they nestled into the pillows and cushions up against Roul. They did a multitude of poses together, some serious, some cute, some fun. In addition, they took some singles as well. “I have an idea hehe..” Ia leaned into Roul and unbuttoned his shirt. Enjoying Ia on them so much, Roul only just then noticed Ia had worked off all clothes except for his undies. “You sure do quick work of me, baby.” Roul wanted more, but Ia pulled away, going to the phone.

“C’mon hunky boy, give me some steamy poses for when you’re not with me.” Never to disappoint them, Roul arched himself amongst the pillows in a couple arrangements. He could only hope they turned out sexy and not silly. He was also very thankful it was summer and not cold. “Alright, now it’s your tur-“ Ia descended upon him, kissing him wildly as he (gently) tore off their clothes. (He had ripped a shirt once and felt terrible.) Eventually, the kisses slowed, giving Roul a chance to man the camera, getting some splendid shots of Ia. They were well versed in seductive photos. Roul received them regularly, and they were much more artful than the ones he sent in return. Their final series of photos were them together, sans clothing.

After they agreed they were finished, they redressed and resumed cuddling. “I’m sure the stars looked lovely while we were up here hehe. Maybe tomorrow we’ll get to see them.” Ia said as Roul pulled them both up. “Let’s reset everything and head back down stairs, baby.” Ia let out a whimper, but agreed. They replaced the tarp and unplugged the lights. Once they were out, the glittering night sky was easily viewable. “Oh wow, look at them all.” Remembering his Diana, Roul quickly attached it to the tripod, readied it, and opened its shutter. “Okay, my phone will go off when to close the shutter. For now we can enjoy Earth’s beauty in peace.”

Ia shook against Roul excitingly as they stared up at the night sky. “That’s the big dipper and then the little dipper. The little dipper is actually part of another constellation but it’s harder to make out... “ they continued on until Roul’s phone buzzed. He closed the shutter and wound to the next exposure. Ia picked up where they left off, educating Roul on stars and all the wonders of the night sky. They soon realized Roul was only looking at the sky part of the time, most of it he was gazing at Ia. “Heyy now I’m not the night sky!” Roul chuckled and wrapped them close to him. “No, but you’re my star. You’re all I want to look at.” They buried their face into his chest, semi muffled, they said “You’re my star tooo.” They hugged tight for a couple more minutes. “Ia, baby, I’m so glad you wanted to go star gazing, ‘just because’.”

#FLUFF #ABSOLUTE FLUFF AND NOTHING ELSE #roul x ia #roul #ia #writing #fic #cute #somft #mine

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the-awkward-outlaw · 4 years

Note

Hii, I'm actually sad-sweet-cowboah and I've always wanted to request something from you! How about modern AU, Arthur surprises reader with a horse she's been really eyeing for a while? Maybe it doubles as a cute proposal? (and just for reference, a gorgeous golden Palomino Quarter Horse!)

Ah I’m so glad you sent this in to me! This was a lot of fun, and Arthur is fucking adorable! 16/10 best boyfriend/husband material, you cannot change my mind! (Will someone make that into a meme?) Anyways, have fun!

Masterlist

Read on AO3

(BTW, Arthur’s hot as hell in this pic.....)

Arthur stands on the deck of his house, lost in thought. He really should be in the barn, finishing up the last of the day’s work, but he’s worried. You should’ve been home half an hour ago and yet he still hasn’t heard from you. He’s texted you, but nothing. Maybe you’re just stuck in traffic.

You and Arthur have lived together for over a year, and been dating for over two years. He remembers how he convinced you to move in with him, as you’d been adamant. Hell, it’d been hard enough to get you to date him.

When you both first met, it was like a spark between you. However, you were scared of taking the next step with him, as you were just a natural loner. Not only that, you’d been alone for so long you didn’t think there would be anyone who wanted to be with you. So when Arthur asked you to be his girlfriend, you almost ran off, sure he was pulling your leg. However, something told you that you needed to be brave, to take the leap, so you did.

About 8 months later, Arthur really wanted you to move in with him on his little ranch, tucked in a canyon not too far from a small mountain town. But again, you were hesitant. It’s not that you didn’t love him, just the opposite in fact. You were so in love, you were constantly terrified that you’d mess up, that he’d end up hating you when you ended up living together. The last thing you wanted was to mess this up.

Then, shortly after your first year anniversary, the Coronavirus pandemic hit and everyone was sent into quarantine. Luckily you were able to work remotely, so you didn’t lose much money. It was nice working from home, you could stay in your pj’s all day, not worry about makeup, none of that stuff. But you missed seeing your boyfriend and he missed you. The two of you did plenty of video chats, but it wasn’t the same. You couldn’t smell him, hug him, touch him, kiss him… nothing. You tried doing some video sex, but you got outrageously uncomfortable doing it over video chat (what if some hacker got in?), and Arthur wasn’t all that comfortable either.

Those 60 days were some of the longest and loneliest of your life. You would’ve easily gone to his home and see you, but his little town wanted absolutely no outsiders to come in, so they blocked the roads, preventing you and Arthur from visiting. When quarantine was lifted, that was when you decided to move in with Arthur. After all, you didn’t know if there would be another one. You could work remotely, only having to go into the office a couple times a month for meetings, so the work situation with you was easy enough.

That was over a year ago, and despite your fears that the two of you would end up breaking up after a few months, the opposite happened. Your relationship grew beyond what you thought and the two of you have never been more in love. Sure, there’s been a few arguments, but nothing bad enough to break things off. For the most part, you and Arthur get along famously.

Arthur sighs again, still feeling worried. Today was one of the days you had to go into the office for meetings. They never run past five, and the office is nearly an hour away, but it’s nearly eight in the evening. You should definitely be home by now. You must be stuck in traffic, which is why you’ve not answered any of his texts. He pulls out his phone and dials your number. Why he didn’t do this earlier is beyond him.

A few rings go by and you finally pick up. “Hey, babe,” you say.

He smiles. “Hey, darlin’. Just worried about ya. Everything okay?”

“Yeah. Just a big accident on the freeway. I stopped and got dinner too since it’s late. Should be home in like ten minutes.”

“Good. Kiss ya when I see ya,” he says and hangs up. That’s always how he says good bye to you over the phone and you love it.

Like clockwork, ten minutes go by and you pull into the driveway. He walks out of the house to greet you, pulling you into a tight hug and kissing you like he always does. He wants to tell you so badly what he’s got planned, but it’s gotta be a surprise. Under no circumstance can he spoil it. Not like this.

After dinner, the two of you cuddle up on the couch and watch a show before going to bed. He can tell you’re exhausted. These meeting days are your least favorite and they always wipe you out. Arthur cradles your head to his chest as you lie in bed. Within seconds, he hears you snore softly, making him smile. He goes back to thinking about tomorrow.

Arthur’s owned this ranch for most of his life. It wasn’t always his though. He grew up here with his adopted fathers, Hosea and Dutch. However, Hosea was killed very suddenly a few years ago in a car crash after he’d been hit by a drunk driver. His death had been so sudden that it hit Dutch extremely hard. Dutch ended up just vanishing one day, driven by grief and confusion. Arthur hasn’t seen him since.

The ranch fell into his hands after Dutch disappeared. He secretly hopes that maybe Dutch will come back someday, if he’s still alive that is. He’d love you two to meet, as he’s sure Dutch would like you better than his last serious girlfriend Mary.

His thoughts drift to her and he feels even more nervous. He’d been engaged to her for three months before she’d broken it off. She claimed it was because she hated his location, that she wanted to live in the city, not some small mountain town where everything was far away. Perhaps that was true, but he suspected there was more to it than that. After all, when Mary’s father discovered that Arthur had two fathers, he was extremely upset that Mary was dating someone raised by homosexuals. He’s always suspected that her father had a big reason behind why they broke up. Not only that, but he wonders if she was seeing a guy on the side. How could she go from being engaged to being in a new relationship only three weeks after they broke up? Good riddance, though, he thinks. He loves you a hundred times more than he ever loved her.

You’ve never cared about his upbringing, stating that Hosea and Dutch were at least good parents to him. You’ve known far too many heterosexual parents who were awful, and how many gay couples are out there who’d love to have kids and be the best parents. You weren’t in contact with your parents anymore (he still didn’t even know what they look like), so they aren’t an issue.

Arthur starts thinking about how sad and lonely your life has been. How you spent so many years alone and how you believed you’d die alone. He’s so grateful for having met you. You don’t deserve to die alone, you’re too good of a person. He kisses your head as you sleep, overwhelmed with his sense of love for you. A smile makes its way to his lips as he thinks about tomorrow.

Over the past year, as you’ve grown more comfortable to ranch life, you’ve been thinking about maybe getting your own horse. Arthur has a few that you’re certainly welcome to, of course, but you’ve been wanting one to call your own for a while now. A few weeks ago, you’d both been in town to go to the one grocery store there. As the truck went down the highway and passed another ranch, you saw the signs “horses for sale”. In the pasture was a beautiful palomino quarter horse. It looked like it was made of gold as it grazed in the sun. You begged Arthur to stop the truck and just go see the horse.

He pulled over, unable to resist your excitement, and you went to the fence. The palomino, along with most of its pasture mates, came over to investigate you and Arthur. You patted her nose and Arthur could tell you were already in love with her. However, he had no idea what her temperament was like, so he came up with a plan.

On the days when you had to go to meetings, Arthur went to the horse’s owner to ask questions and get acquainted with the horse. She was young, only three, but the owner had raised her and trained her himself. He invited Arthur to go on a trail ride using her so he could see how good of a riding horse she was. After only twenty minutes on her, Arthur knew she was perfect for you. She responded to his lightest touch and command. After the trail ride, Arthur bought her, but he kept her at her former owners so you wouldn’t see her too soon.

Yesterday, while you’d been gone, Arthur went and picked the horse up and brought her back. She didn’t have a name yet, but he wanted you to have that privilege. The man who raised her called her Sierra, but he knew that was your mother’s name and you were unlikely to keep it as you had no desire to see her for as long as he’s known you. He struggles to fall asleep, feeling like a kid on Christmas, excited to show you his gift. He’s also terrified as he’s going to use the horse as a segway for the biggest decision of his life.

************************************************

The next morning, Arthur gets up much earlier than usual. He’s normally up a bit past sunrise so he can feed the animals and get an earlier start on cleaning before it gets hot. This morning, though, you wake up at the crack of dawn and find his side of the bed empty. After grabbing a cup of coffee, you go out and find him just finishing feeding the chickens.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he says, a big grin on his face.

You say good morning and he comes over, leaning across the fence so he can kiss you.

“Hey, I got a couple more chores to do, but once they’re done, I got somethin’ to show ya.”

“Okay, I’ll help. What needs to be done?”

He smiles, loving how willing you always are to help him out. It makes his life a lot easier. He struggles though, as most of the remaining chores were in the stables with the horses, including yours.

“Um… well, why don’t you go through the chicken coop, see about eggs.”

You nod and go off to grab the collecting basket. Arthur asks you to finish feeding the chickens as well so he can go into the stable. After collecting nearly a dozen eggs and placing them in the egg storage so they can be sold this weekend, you brush off your hands and start heading into the stables. Arthur darts out, slightly sweaty from his work.

“Woo, it’s hot. Hey baby, um, maybe you can go get us some drinks?” he says. His tone is weird, like he’s hiding something.

“Um… okay. Everything okay?”

“Everythin’s just fine.” He kisses you again real quick and then shoots back into the stables.

After retrieving two beer bottles, you go out to find Arthur in the paddock, which is attached to the right side of the barn so the horses can go in and out of their stalls. He’s wringing his gloved hands a bit, but smiles when he sees you. What is going on with him?

“Thanks, darlin’,” he says when you go into the pen and hand him his beer. Instead of opening it, he places it onto a post of the fence. “I wanted to show you somethin’.”

He looks to the barn and whistles. Odd, he’s looking at one of the stalls that’s been empty the entire time you’ve lived here. Something snorts and out walks the golden horse you’d been admiring for the past few weeks. You gasp and put your hands over your mouth.

“Arthur, is that…?”

“She’s yours, sweetheart. I took her for a ride a while ago, she’s a good horse.”

The filly walks over to you and snorts in greeting, stretching her neck out to bump her nose to your hand. Tears leak out of your eyes as you start rubbing her neck, going down to her withers.

“Arthur, she’s beautiful!”

He chuckles softly and walks over to hug you, grinning as you bury your face into his chest. God, you couldn’t ask for a sweeter boyfriend.

“Thank you so much, Arthur! I love her.”

“Good. What’s her name?”

“Did she not have one before?”

He tells you what her name used to be, but as he predicted, you don’t like it. You think for a moment, studying her golden coat. She swishes her silver tail.

“Maybe… Freyja? I know you like having names of gods and goddesses for your horses.”

Arthur chuckles as he thinks about his two favorite horses, Boadicea and Artemis. “If that’s what you want, darlin’. She’s your horse though, you name her whatever feels right.”

You look at her and smile. “Freyja feels right.”

Freyja snorts, not giving a single damn about her name. Her eyes are soft as you pat her neck again.

“Well, why don’t we groom miss Freyja? Maybe you can ride her around the pasture, see how you like her.”

You nod and go into the stables to grab a brush and hoof pick. Freyja’s very patient as you groom her, standing still as you clean out her feet. Arthur hauls out the heavy saddle after you throw on her saddle blanket and grab her bridle. After cinching on the saddle and adjusting the stirrups, Arthur says, “Oh I forgot somethin’, hold on.”

He goes into the stables as you pat the horse’s neck again, anxious to hop into the saddle. He comes back out, empty handed and looking frustrated.

“I thought I left it in there,” he grunts, coming back over to you.

“What you looking for?”

“A thing,” he says, ignoring you and shoving his hand into the saddle bag. “I thought I left it… ah ha! Don’t know how it got in there.”

He pulls his hand out and you see a small, velvety box. He brushes it off quickly and then holds it out to you.

“Sweetheart, I uh… I been thinking about doin’ this for a while. It would… it would mean a lot to me.”

You take the box, your stomach clenching. Is this a ring? Or is it something else and you’re just being hopeful? Your heart pounding in your ears, you open the box and see the ring. You gasp. It’s not a diamond, you always hated diamonds. Too common and overpriced. Instead, it’s a silver band, the metal engraved with fancy, swooping curls, a gem in your favorite color perched on top.

“Arthur?” you say, your voice squeaking as you take out the ring.

He clasps your hands in his, the ring nestled in your palm. “I wanna marry ya, sweetheart. You… well, you’re more than I could ever hope for in a companion. I never thought I’d wanna marry someone again after Mary…” he looks down and swallows. You know all about her of course. “But that was until I fell in love with you. There’s no doubt in my mind that I wanna spend the rest of my life with you.”

Fresh tears are cascading down your cheeks. You look at the ring again and Arthur’s suddenly afraid you’ll say no, or that you’re not ready. He worries that he might have to try and talk you into this like he had when he wanted to date you and then have you move in. He doesn’t want to do that with this though. Just as his stomach begins to sink, you smile up at him.

“Yes, Arthur. I will marry you, a thousand times.”

He smiles, swallowing a wave of his own tears and cups your cheek. He takes the ring and slides it onto your finger, then he presses his forehead to yours. For several moments, you both stand there in this position, letting the world go by as you bask in one another’s presence. You slide a hand over his neck, wanting to be even closer to him, your future husband.

Suddenly something shoves your shoulder hard and it’s followed by a loud snort. Arthur chuckles, pulling away from you. “Think Freyja wants your attention again.”

You laugh and kiss him before facing your horse and climbing into the saddle (with his help of course). You adjust yourself in the saddle, sliding both feet into the stirrups. Arthur pats your thigh and tells you to just walk around the pen so that you and Freyja can get acquainted with the feel of one another.

As Arthur watches you walk with your horse, he feels a sense of excitement and contentment. Excited for the future, of course, but he’s never been so sure about anything as he is about this. Marrying you is the only thing he could do, he’s never wanted anything more.

#rdr2 fanfic #red dead fanfic #arthur morgan #arthur morgan x female reader #awkward asks

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kyidyl · 4 years

Text

Not Deer

(This was inspired by that post that was circulating about the Not Deer in Appalachia and the town that I currently live in. @leftturnat4thandbananas I especially thought you would enjoy this little bit of quarantine-induced madness. You’ll probably recognize some of the things I’m describing.)

“Alexa, stop!,” Macey yelled at the black cylinder sitting on her night stand. The alarm shut off, and I started packing up my stuff. I caught her frown as she watched me.

“What?,” I asked, “It’s almost curfew. You know how my mom is about curfew.”

“It’s snowing outside, and it’s dark,” she swung around so she was sitting on the edge of her bed and flipped her long, dark braid back over her shoulder.

I finished packing my homework into my backpack and stood, “It’s always dark and cold when I go home in the winter. I’ll be fine.”

Both the argument and the concern in her brown eyes was familiar. She was definitely the mom friend in our group, “It’s not always snowing. People aren’t careful in the snow.”

“They’re never careful on that road,” we both lived along a back road that wound through farms and woods. It had a lot of curves, hills, and blind spots - and no sidewalk. But it was the only way to get home, so it’s the way I went. She stood up too, following me as I left her room and started down the steps.

“You can stay the night, you know. My mom won’t mind.”

“I know, Mace, but I will. You know I don’t like getting ready for school here. All my stuff is at home. I’ve either got to get up at the ass crack of dawn,” which never happened because we always stayed up late talking, “Or do a walk of shame.”

I let my backpack down in the hallway with a thunk, and retrieved my coat from their closet. I’d brought gloves, a scarf, and a hat, too even though I normally don’t. I was glad I’d grabbed them. She stood on the bottom step, chewing her bottom lip. Her parents were out to dinner, so she couldn’t bug her dad to drive me, but I know she would have if they’d been here. She tried one more tactic to get me to give up on my walk home, “What about your mom? Can she come get you?”

I shook my head, “Dad has the car. Listen, I’ve walked home in the snow before. It’ll be totally fine.”

She sighed and dropped her arms, “This is what you were talking about earlier, isn’t it. The worrying.”

“Yeah, but it’s ok. I get why you do it,” I gave her a quick hug and hefted my backpack onto my shoulders, “I’ll see you at school tomorrow.”

“Text me when you get home?”

“Of course! Later!”

“Later, Apple,” I smiled at her nickname for me and left. After I closed the door behind me, I heard the lock click into place. Her parents’ rules: if you’re home alone, you lock the door. I shifted the weight of my books on my back, and looked around.

Macey lived on a small farm, and so she had a long driveway between her house and the road. I started walking, and the sand and rocks of the unpaved drive crunched under the soles of my shit-kickers. Macey’s dad had salted the drive before they’d left, and the stones glimmered wetly in the moonlight. It turned out that the snowing had stopped while we’d been hanging out, and the clouds had gone. The ground was blanketed in a couple of inches of unblemished white. Just enough to cover the grass, but not enough to get school canceled.

The moon was out, bright and full, and it illuminated the flat, white expanse of the land that stretched out on either side. The air smelled like ice and cold, like icicles and sleeping forest. There was only a little wind, and it blew up swirls of loosely packed snowflakes from the ground. Everything had that cushioned silence that follows a new snowfall.

It took a few minutes for me to reach the actual road, and unlike the Romero family’s driveway, it hadn’t been touched by salt, sand, or plow. Typical. It probably would be covered until tomorrow morning. Our little town wasn’t exactly proactive about things like that. They preferred to suffer, I guess. I gave an annoyed snort to the empty night,

I was careful as I turned left onto the empty road, watching for the glow of headlights to give me some forewarning of a car. None came, and I kept walking.

Soon, the flat land of the farms gave way to the woods. Houses, none of them of the new construction that made up the subdivisions further up the road, were set back from the road or behind a screen of trees. This road had hills, and further along it the side of the road would give way to steep ditches and gullies. Our here, there were plenty of animals. My parents have hit deer especially a number of times; my dad even bought these weird things for his hood that are supposed to whistle and chase the deer away.

As the landscape transitioned into woods, there was an old, broken barn. Not even a barn, really, more like a two sheds stuck together. Half of it was beaten, lilting boards and a slice for a door. The other half was a rusting tin can of a structure, the metal walls little more than rust and the vines that held it together, and a set of open doors that led into gloom. A barely-there metal roof was slanted over the rested half and pitched over the wooden half, and it was only slightly less rusted than the shed itself. A useless decaying horse gate was off to the side, slanting drunkenly to the right, and a path into the woods was behind it.

(picture to break up the wall o text.)

I hated that barn.

It creeped me out. The hairs on the back of my neck rose every time I got close. Even as a little kid I hadn’t been curious enough to overcome that particular fear, and it hadn’t gotten better over the years. Every time I walked home I crossed the street to avoid walking too closed to it and sprinted passed it. But tonight, the snow and slickness made it dangerous for me to do either of those things. My heart rate ticked up and I took my hands out of my pocket. When it came to fight or flight, I was very much in the fight category. It seemed like the wind blew a little harder, and suddenly I thought I could hear all kinds of noises that I hadn’t heard before.

The cracking of a stick somewhere in the woods, almost like a gunshot in the dark.

The fump has a pile of snow was pushed off of a branch somewhere.

The flap and tumble of some unlucky bird.

A barking dog menacing me from one of the homes nearby.

These sounds were normal, but as I was walking in front of the sad, lonely little structure, they all seemed sinister. They were living things, pulsing in the darkness when I wanted to be alone. The sounds of my steps in the snow answered. Shit kickers aren’t stealthy.

I walked past that structure as fast as I could, the fear tightening my shoulders more with every step. I clenched my teeth and my fists, and walked. The stillness was oppressive now, where moments before it had been soothing. Fear makes you see things in shadows.

Which is why, when the winter-bared bones of the bush in front of the shed clacked and scraped together in a gust of wind, I screamed and ran. Damn the snow, damn fight or flight, I was not looking to fight some supernatural entity tonight.

Apparently, though, the laws of physics still applied to me. I ran, but I didn’t get very far before I tripped have a big branch on the side of the road. My feet slipped in the snow, and I went down face-first onto my hands and knees.

In case you have ever wondered: snow does very little to cushion a fall onto rocks and rough pavement. It only makes your clothes wet on top of giving you road rash. And that ish hurts.

“Great, Alisha, juuuust great. Skinning your damned knees like a five year old because of some wind,” I grumbled aloud to myself as I stood and started brushing debris off the now-wet knees of my jeans. I checked under my gloves, and while my hands stung, the gloves had saved me from the words of the skinning. In fact, the worst was the throbbing on the back of my head where my backpack had slid up my back and smacked my head. Well, that and the knowledge that whatever goblin lived in that shed was probably having a laugh at my expense.

The fall did do one good thing, though. It broke through the worst of my fear, and I laughed to myself as the adrenaline started wearing off. I started down the road again, stomping in protest, my cold hands jammed back in my pockets.

From here, the road got darker as the trees reached overhead. Even in the winter they blocked most of the light from the moon, and out here in the country they didn’t bother with street lights. The embankments on the side of the road rose and forced me to walk directly on the road instead of off to the side. This was the most dangerous part, because this was also where the tight curves started. I felt my adrenaline spike again, but this time there was nothing supernatural about it; I was alert for headlights bouncing off of the tree branches.

As I walked, I listened to the world around me, my caution making my senses stretch further. I heard the same things as before: the cracking of sticks in the forest as some creature shuffled around them, the huffing of a dog that probably just wanted to play, the whispered hush of snow rearranging itself in the trees, and the occasional noise of some small creatures settling in for the night. They were the same noises I always heard around here at this time of year, familiar as the nose on my face. It’s funny how the mind plays tricks.

I found a good walking speed that wasn’t so fast it was dangerous, but wasn’t so slow that I’d be frozen before I got home, and the time passed quickly. Before I knew it, I was almost at the little bridge before the turn off for my house. Really, bridge was a generous word for the small overpass that took the road over the little creek. It was just a flat stretch of road with a thin shoulder and a low concrete guardrail. On the other side, the road curved out of view.

(another pic to break up the wall o text. Both images are screenshots of Google street view edited in PS.)

Here, the trees pulled back some and the moon was able to shine clearly on the flat surface of the bridge. There, standing in the middle of the road, was a huge buck. I’ve seen a lot of deer living out in the stix, but this was easily the biggest one I’d ever seen. I’m 5′2, and this thing looked like its shoulder would be somewhere around my head. I didn’t even know they could get that big. The moon painted its orange-brown coat with silver, and threw the shadows created by its twisting antlers into sharp relief. They were as big as him - thick and heavy, and wickedly sharp. I couldn’t count the points from here, but it had to be at least twelve.

Wait...antlers? It was February. My dad liked to hunt, and even though I’d never gotten into he, he’d taught me a few things about deer. One of those things was that the bucks dropped their antlers earlier than this, and it was a good time to go hunting for the shed racks in the woods. This deer shouldn’t have any antlers this late in the season.

I stopped in my tracks, and as I did, it whipped its head around to look at me. There moonlight was a sharp little blade in the dark eyes of this thing as it stared at me from the other side of the river. It stared, and stared, and as it did, the same fear grabbed hold of my guts and scratched its way across the nerves of my skin. My heart was pounding, my muscles clamped tight. This was nothing like the fear I’d felt while passing the shed. It seemed like a cozy little refuge, now, as I started down this deer.

I couldn’t understand why I felt this way - it had done nothing but be big and not shed its antlers yet. That logic didn’t matter. I wasn’t getting a single step closer to that thing. I ground my teeth as I stared at it. I wanted to look away, but I couldn’t. Right now, my actions were being guided by a part of my brain that kept my ancestors alive.

Predator, it screamed, that is a predator!

It made no sense. It was a deer. Sure, they’d eat meat sometimes if it was around. They looked at gut piles like they were treats this time of year, but they didn’t kill and eat humans. That was another thing my instincts were saying - hungry. This thing was hungry. I still couldn’t say why or how I knew any of this, but I knew it down to the red marrow of my bones.

It was strange - the longer I stared down that deer, the more of a tug I felt to keep walking. To cross the river. But the terror was useful; it kept me from following that impulse. The deer huffed, and its breath didn’t fog in the cold. My brain filed that detail away automatically with the height and the antlers. The animal sounded frustrated, although it shouldn’t have been possible for me to identify that emotion so clearly.

Then it started pacing. I watched in fascination horror as it moved with an awkward, stuttering gate. It didn’t seem to know how to place its hooves, and it swayed back and forth, all while not taking its too-intelligent eyes off of its prey. It didn’t know how to move properly, and I remembered that my dad had told me of an illness. Chronic Wasting Disease - mad cow for deer. He told me how to spot one, and to steer clear of it. He told me it was neurological; that it made it hard for them to move.

But this wasn’t that. No, this deer moved like it was something else wearing the skin of a deer. Like it was new to that body and didn’t know how to use it. Its fumbling reminded me of the way a toddler moved - wobbling and unsure of what its muscles should do, but enthusiastic about being up and walking instead of crawling. It was like that, but with far less innocence and far more jerks and twitches in its movement. It almost looked like it was adjusting its deer suit as it paced on its side of the river.

It huffed again and then growled. Not like a tiger or a dog would growl, more like a cat growling if that cat had the vocal cords of a high-pitched cow. I screamed in surprise and covered my ears at the sound.

Come. Here. I could feel its anger and frustration pressing in on me, looking for purchase, looking for a crack in my terror.

There was none. It was all-encompassing. It was terror of the sort that fueled strength. Terror that sharpened your mind, that made time slow so you could think faster and survive. It was the same kind of terror that had saved the earliest of my kind on the savannahs in Africa. It was terror that whispered to me with a small, comforting voice, do not cross the moving water.

Of course - it hadn’t even attempted to cross the stream, pacing back and forth over where the edge of the stream was rather than where the edge of the bridge was. It couldn’t cross the moving water.

As soon as I had the thought the creature’s growling was honed into a scream. It stood on two legs, making it tower over me. It was trying to be more threatening, but I knew now. I knew as long as I stayed over here I was ok.

“No,” I said, my voice stead and calm. I wasn’t loud, but my voice carried in the snowy stillness and into the moon-bright night, “I won’t cross. You can’t have me.”

It screamed at me again, eyes narrowing in an almost human expression of incredulity. Inside my clothes, my skin was hot from the anger coming from the not-deer, sweat trickling down my spine, but I planted my boots and fisted my hands and would not move. I could taste ice on my tongue, and I took a deep breath through my mouth, letting the cold soothe me.

Then, there was a sound. High pitched and clear, it came from somewhere in the woods or fields around us. It was sweet, and some of the heat of the not-deer’s anger seeped away from my skin. Its had flung around awkwardly towards the sound and it went back on all fours with a loud thud. It snorted and pawed the ground, but it hesitated. Then, the call came again, louder this time. With a final, angry look at me, it took off into the forest away from me and the road home.

I stood there on that road waiting, too afraid to cross, until I was sure that I couldn’t hear it crashing through the bushes anymore. Then I took off like a shot, snow be damned. I ran across the creek, my feet sliding as I took a sharp right onto the road that led to my house, down that road and up to my house. I ran straight in the front door, locked it behind me, and pounded up the steps to my room.

I texted Macey when I got my backpack off, but I knew it was going to be a long, sleepless night.

#fiction #stories #writing #horror #not deer #appalachia #creepy

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kyleoreillysknee · 5 years

Text

Sounds Good? - Chapter 1

Pairing: Kyle O’Reilly x OFC (Amanda)

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1,983

Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe agreeing to move into a stranger's spare room after a phone call wasn't the best idea. Maybe she should've realized this before she was standing outside the apartment door with her arms too full of her stuff to properly knock. After kicking it in hopefully a polite way, Amanda nearly lost her balance and toppled backward until a pair of large hands secured her elbows.

"Woah there, you alright?"

At least the stranger sounded nice, and after peeking over the box in her grip she realized he looked nice too.

With a light strain in her voice, Amanda managed a weak smile as she said, "I'm ok!"

"Here let me get that for you," The nice stranger offered with a lopsided grin, easing the box from her arms and tucking it against his side in order to give her enough space to enter the apartment, "I'm Kyle."

"Oh thank you," As she stepped around him, she cautiously scanned what she could of the place and found it perfectly neat and tidy which held promise, "I'm Amanda, it's nice to meet you!"

Now able to get a better look at more than the top 1/4 of his face, Amanda realized the more than nice stranger was nice in more ways than one. He would've had a boyish charm if he wasn't so giant. His ginger beard didn't match his hair colour and he was somehow pulling the look off. It didn't help her poor nerves that he was giving her his undivided attention so she couldn't look away from his big warm brown eyes.

"Than-" "Do y-" They both abruptly stopped at the sound of the other's voice and Amanda let out a breathy giggle while he bit down on his grin and used his free hand to gesture for her to continue.

"I just wanted to thank you for letting me move in, I promise to not be a bother," She bowed her head a little and hoped he could see how grateful she was in her gaze.

"It's fine, I had the open room and," Kyle hesitated for some reason before admitting, "Candace vouched for you and explained the situation a bit."

"Oh," Amanda mumbled, trying to hide the hurt from her voice before her curiosity got the better of her, “What exactly did Candace tell you?”

“Just that your old roommate kicked you out without much notice,” the corners of his eyes crinkled as he flashed a sympathetic smile, “It’s cool if you don’t wanna go into it. Can’t imagine that was fun to deal with.” As he spoke he motioned with his chin down the hall before guiding her towards her new room.

“Yeah, it’s … yeah” Amanda sighed, absently rubbing her elbow as she stood on the threshold before letting out a small noise of surprise, “There’s already a bed in here?”

Kyle placed her box on the naked mattress before giving a nod, “Bobby- The guy that used to live with me didn’t need it when he moved out so I’ve kept it in here. I can move it out if you need the space.”

“No!” she quickly blurted before catching herself, “I mean, no thank you. I actually need one, I couldn’t really fit mine on the bus.”

Kyle frowned as he gave her another once over seemingly searching for something, “Did you … get kicked out today?” Amanda slowly sunk her head down, biting her lip before quickly nodding, which only made his frown deepen, “And you only have a small box of stuff?”

“I wasn’t given a lot of time to pack,” she admitted sheepishly, wanting to do nothing more than sink into the floor under his scrutiny.

“Well,” Kyle drew out the word, bringing the dramatic tension to a boil before continuing, “Let’s go back and get the rest of your things. I got a truck so there’s plenty of room for anything big.”

Amanda snapped her head up in surprise to see Kyle giving her a warm smile. The little bit of kindness enough to make her sniff and force back some tears. Kyle either didn’t or just pretended not to notice as he fished around in his pockets for his keys. Soon enough they were approaching his truck.

After having to jump and pull herself up into the seat, Amanda caught Kyle stifling a laugh from the corner of her eye huffed which only forced him to clear his throat to cover a snort. The drive was odd in that it was incredibly easy for her to feel comfortable around him, but she didn’t let herself linger on that, having bigger things to deal with. As they parked she felt all the tension build up and force her shoulders and back to go rigid once she habitually looked up at her old balcony. Having not heard his door open, she turned to find Kyle looking at her with pinched eyebrows.

“Time all the time you need,” He offered, the worry in his eyes overpowering his attempt at a reassuring smile. After watching her take a few deep breaths he couldn’t help but ask, “What exactly happened?”

Amanda sat on her hands to force herself not to fidget before she answered, “Her boyfriend tried to make a move on me and when I told her about it she got mad at me and accused me of trying to steal him from her before kicking me out. I’d never, he’s a jerk!” She grimaced as she got worked up for a moment only to deflate with regret, “but still, maybe I should’ve kept my mouth shut.”

“No. You did the right thing.” Kyle said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world before reaching out to put a hand on her shoulder, “Listen, I know we just met so this doesn’t mean much but I got your back. We’re going to go up there, grab your stuff, head home and order pizza, sound good?”

“That sounds really good,” Amanda spoke with every ounce of sincerity she could muster as she gave a small smile which made Kyle’s widen. He gave her shoulder a light squeeze before getting out of the truck and waiting for her to take the lead.

As she approached the building, she gave herself a small internal pep talk, not realizing she was softly whispering encouragements until Kyle chuckled a little once she called herself a tiny badass. Now sporting a bright flush, she punched the buzz code and held her breath until hearing a familiar voice in an all too sweet tone.

“Who is it?”

“It’s Amanda," she hoped she sounded assertive despite fighting a small quiver in her lip, "I want the rest of my stuff,”

“Oh,” the sweetness vanished into a sneer and Amanda half expected to be hung up on, “You have 5 minutes.”

At the click of the door swinging open, she let out a shaky breath and found Kyle sporting that combo confused and concerned look again.

"I'm sorry about anything Alexa ends up saying to you," she sighed as they entered the elevator.

"M sure I'll be fine," he replied, nudging her gently with his elbow, "I got my big boy pants on today."

Amanda let out a feather-light laugh as the doors dinged open, "I could use a pair, where do you get yours?"

Kyle's face split into a grin and chuckled, "The big boy store, obviously."

Their banter managed to make Amanda forget to be nervous until the apartment door swung open to reveal Alexa poised to strike. Her icy glare flicked over to Kyle and Amanda relished in the short-lived moment her composure broke.

"Who's this?" Back in her line of fire, Amanda froze for a second.

"I'm Kyle, her new roommate," he spoke up from beside her, placing a hand on her shoulder. Amanda stood a little taller at the gesture, drawing some strength from it.

"We won't take long." She said, stepping around Alexa and into the apartment. Kyle surprised her by saying excuse me to Alexa before he followed her but she realized that he didn't know Alexa well enough to recognize that anything that could've been killed with kindness was long dead.

Entering her old room, Amanda flushed at the embarrassing state of things, having torn the place apart in her earlier rush to grab the essentials and priceless. As she went to grab the stack of flattened boxes from her closet, Kyle made his way over to her bunny cage and knelt down to get a better look inside.

"What's this little guy's name?" He asked with an eager fondness as he poked his fingers through the bars to gently pet the flop-eared rabbit.

"Hubert," Amanda answered with a bit of pride before panic set in and she began rambling, "I'm sorry, I forgot to ask if your building allows pets! Or if you were ok with rabbits. I swear he's not annoying or smelly, I clean the cage-"

Kyle held up his hand to get her to stop talking and wore a bemused smile, "Its ok, on all fronts. I'm not going to let you get rid of a guy as handsome as Hubert." He stood up and crossed the room to help her with the boxes.

"I am a bit surprised that you left him here though," He moved to her bookshelf and began clearing out the shelves.

"Alexa’s mean and spiteful but she's not evil. She'd never do anything to him. And I was going to bus back here for him right away." Amanda began emptying the drawers of her dresser into a backpack.

They fell into a comfortable rhythm of packing, exchanging facts back and forth. She learned he was a firefighter, loved cooking, and had his friends over once a month for a game night. He found out she was a vet assistant and requested puppy pics once a week as part of the rent agreement.

An hour passed before they managed to get everything sorted, Alexa only poking her head into the room to complain at them twice. She tossed Amanda her old set of keys and instructed her to shove them under the door once she was done getting everything out. It didn't take long for Amanda to end up back in the passenger seat with Hubert in his carrier on her lap.

The drive back was spent recommending music to each other and occasionally fussing over Hubert when he made distressed honks. Kyle was a workhorse once they were back at his place and through precarious box placement managed to get everything moved in two trips. Amanda laid out like a starfish on the floor surrounded by towers of her stuff and let out a giant sigh of relief, feeling at least 10 pounds lighter now that the cloud of facing Alexa was behind her.

"Thank you for everything today, Kyle."

He turned from setting up the rabbit cage to glance at her over his shoulder and smiled warmly, "You don't need to thank me so much, just trying to be a good roommate." Amanda lifted her arm to give him a thumbs up which had him laughing and shaking his head.

"You said something about pizza?" She brought up a few minutes later, still sprawled out on the floor and staring at the ceiling.

"Oh fuck yeah!" Kyle exclaimed, jumping up to pat down his pockets for his phone and gently toss it beside her once he had his order put in. They spent the time waiting for the delivery unpacking and Amanda told him about the time someone brought in a monkey to the vet. Later when she was full of pizza and flopping into bed she decided that despite the start of her day being awful today was overall a good one.

#my writing #kyle o'reilly #wwe imagine #kyle o'reilly x ofc #kyle o'reilly imagine #nxt imagine #wwe imagines #kyle o'reilly imagines #nxt imagines #fic: sounds good?

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acrobaticcatfeline · 5 years

Text

The Fear of the Dragonwitch (Triplets Rolorem AU) Chapter 2!!!

Word Count: 2738

TW: Remus, vague mentions of deceit, swearing, arguing, anxiety, self deprecation, that’s it I think, lmk if I missed anything!!!

Notes: Ok so we have a second chapter!!! First chapter here! I have a whole plot line planned out for this fic y’all don’t understand. This chapter is just family dynamics, but next chapter should have more interaction with the other characters. Hopefully I get to a bit of Logan centric things soon but who knows, I certainly don’t! I hope you like it, I really do!

Pairings: Vivian x Mimi (OCxOC), pining demus possibly more in the future!

Summary: “wait you can sing?” roman was just trying to tell his family about this lifechanging event, and no one is taking his concerns seriously! though, maybe a bit of confidence and encouragement from the right people might sooth his anxieties enough for him to actually be excited instead of dreading what was going to happen tomorrow.

“wait you can sing?”

While it was an expected outcome, Roman was in fact rather upset at how quickly his brother had brushed off the important part of his confession. yes, in fact, he can sing but that’s not the point! The point was that he was now being thrown headfirst into a leading role in a musical in front of way more people than he was comfortable with and he was expected to sing and dance as well? While he was catastrophizing Logan pulled up to the curb, stopping to let them get in the car. Unfortunately, while Roman was ready to just drop it and move on, Remus had other plans. As they strapped into the car Remus kept running his mouth.

“seriously though, I've literally never heard you sing how can you be lead role worthy when you’ve never sung in your life? I mean like congrats I guess but like, I dunno if your teachers all that-”

“Remus if I had brought this up so you could tell me how unqualified and bad I was in general I would have asked this morning. I mentioned it because I'm terrified of doing any of this and I can’t let down my teacher. Yes, I can sing, I do it often you just never pay attention to anything in the world other than your stupid bubble. I should have known better than to talk to you about this, of course this is how you'd respond.”

“what's this about?”

Oh yeah, Logan was there too. Well he should probably know too-

“Roman randomly sung in his drama class and got chosen to play the leading role in the schools musical for this quarter.”

Well then. Guess he didn’t need to explain himself. He turned around in his seat, giving a look of ‘what the fuck???’ towards Remus before settling again, ready to be interrogated. However, Logan simply smiled.

“so, your friends absolutely hate you for singing huh?”

“no… shut up!!!”

“hey, congrats ro. You deserve it.”

“no??? no I don’t???? Logan you don’t understand I didn’t even audition!!! He just gave me the part!!! Like firstly that’s unfair to the rest of the kids who actually want parts, and secondly, I don’t want the part?????? This isn’t a ‘congrats!’ occasion!!! This is an ‘oh shit you just got roped into complete life ruining changes because you're an anxious mess who is too afraid to disappoint your teacher’!!!”

“one is easy, the auditions were last week. He already heard all the other options and decided you were the best. You should feel good about that Ro. Two, also simple. I know how much of your free time you spend wishing you could be the one on stage, I see you humming and swaying around the house restraining yourself, you want to do this, you're just scared.”

“…”

“third, change isn’t going to ruin your life. he's not changing your classes, he's not taking you off the tech crew, not much is actually changing. You're using your teacher as extra justification to do something you’ve been dreaming of. You’ve let your anxiety blind you from knowing what you really want. You can’t let it control every aspect of your life.”

“… stop being ‘wise beyond your years’ with me its uncalled for and I'm feeling attacked.”

“listen what do you want from me, I have the knowledge what else am I supposed to do with it at this point?”

“stupid jerk prodigy brother… you stole all the brains from us I can promise.”

“I was by far the smallest of us, I did not absorb your brains.”

“pics or it didn’t happen.”

“insufferable”

As soon as they were home things flipped on their head. Remus had a call and suddenly he was having a breakdown. He wouldn’t even tell anyone what had happened he was just pacing back and forth with wide eyes filled with tears. He was half delirious and Logan was trying and failing to reason with him.

Re, you're walking a hole in the floor you need to calm down. I know you're having an anxiety attack but-”

“IM NOT HAVING AN ANXIETY ATTACK!!!”

“Remus stop yelling-”

“NO, YOU SHUT UP!!! IM NOT ROMAN I DON’T HAVE ANXIETY IM NOT EVEN STRESSED SEE I AM FINE JUST LEAVE ME BE!!! YOU HAVE THE WRONG BROTHER”

Roman and Logan sat in stunned silence as Remus ran off to his room. Roman gave Logan a look and Logan straightened his back and shook his head trying to be composed, though his steadily shaking hands sold him out. He turned away from where Remus had previously been standing and looked back at Roman, moving his offending hands behind his back.

“well it seems like he refuses to be reasoned with. I suppose we have to wait for mother to get home to fix whatever is bothering him.”

“its not your fault lo.”

“… yes. I- of course I know that why would you think I thought otherwise. It was clearly whatever stressor acting on him and not my involvement. I know that. Of course. It’s the only logical conclusion.”

And almost right after their mom walked in the door. She held a large satchel thrown crossbody and her hair was slicked back held in place with a little hairspray and a bunch of bobby pins. It was styled in a neat bun with her bangs framing her face perfectly. She had small black glasses and little silver earrings and had a simple matte red lipstick perfectly in place. She was wearing a light blue button up shirt and a black blazer with matching dress pants and flats. She looked perfectly put together as she tossed off her shoes and threw her bag onto the couch. She smiled at her kids and finally let herself slouch and look a little more like the mess she felt like.

“hi kids, how was school today?”

Roman shot a look at Logan before answering.

“well, um there was a lot, and though I want to tell you, Remus had a meltdown and we need help to get him back. Logan tried but he wouldn’t listen.”

“oh, geez ok um, Lo could you please grab my computer from my car? I have to finish something up later, and Ro could you pop the clam chowder on the stove? It was gonna go with dinner, but I know how much Rem loves it. Besides there should be plenty of the French mac that Mimi makes to feed us tonight. I’ll go work things out with him.”

“hey kiddo? Can I come in?”

Vivian Royale had a knack for pulling her kids out of their heads enough to actually fix problems, but her son Remus was usually rather self sufficient in that regard, while Logan and Roman both had anxiety and Roman had the rest stacked on top, Remus was rather neurotypical and usually had less issues that required her intervention. That was, until high school hit. His mental health took a rapid hit as soon as he had started high school, and no one quite knew what happened. She knocked on his door, waiting for his answer before stepping in.

“hey bud. What's wrong? I heard you had a bit of an outburst. Can you tell me what happened?”

Remus sat on his bed, a green octopus comforter laid on the bed and his Cthulhu plushie was in his grip. He hid his face in the toy as he mumbled something into it.

“Hun I'm gonna need you to speak up ok? We can’t fix anything if I don’t know what's wrong.”

“it’s dumb.”

“obviously its not to you. If it was it wouldn’t have affected you enough to cause you to yell at your brothers.”

“… I just- it’s so dumb I don’t wanna say it!”

“you're safe here Rem.”

“my friend got asked out by this lame dude in our class. And- and I think I have a crush on him. My friend I mean! And- and I don’t know what I'm supposed to do, I can’t tell him, what if he hates me? I just. I don’t know how to feel I just know it sucks.”

Vivian set a gentle hand on her sons’ shoulder and gave him a soft smile. She took his hand and gave it a squeeze.

“I understand Rem. That’s sort of how it felt when I realized I liked Mimi. I've known Mimi since we were kids and it wasn’t until after me and your dad broke up that I realized that I loved her. We were in our twenties and I had three newborns and my best friend jumped headfirst into that without hesitation. Is he actually going on the date?”

“no. he's not his type, I guess. That’s what he said at least.”

“then ask him out! He's not interested in them, and he called you to tell you. You obviously matter to each other, even if he doesn’t like you back, I don’t think it would change anything. Just go for it, what's the worst that could happen?”

“…you're right. I-I guess I’ll talk to him later.”

“atta boy!!! Now come on, Roman has clam chowder on the burner and Mimi should be home soon!”

The four of them sat down at the dining table eating and Logan and Remus recounted their day to their mom, Roman staying quiet for the time being, only wanting to say his announcement once. It was 15 minutes before Mimi got home in her fancy outfit. Her red hair was everywhere, curled and messy and absolutely her. She wore a black dress that had a cat head shape on it, with a pink bow at her waist and where the cats head didn’t cover was a see-through mesh. She had a light pink tank top under it and had a pink and white jacket about 2 sizes too big for her on around her shoulders. Her shoes were shiny pink stilettos that made a pretty click clack noise as she walked. She held a pretty black purse and she had little unicorn earrings that looked adorable with her pink lipstick and black to pink cat eye. She set her bag down on the table next to the door and slipped out of her shoes neatly setting them next to the door before slipping over to the table where everyone was sitting. She ruffled Roman and Remus’ hair before giving a big smile to them all.

“how are my boys doin? I see Viv pulled out the chowder, I hope everything is good!”

“I'm really gay!”

“me too Hun, what's new?”

They all let out a fit of giggles. Mimi went to serve herself a bowl of soup and Logan and Remus repeated their day back to her. When they had finished and Roman still hadn’t spoken, she leaned on her arm with a gentle smile and encouraged him to speak. He nodded and cleared his throat.

“um… it was pretty average all around, but this morning Mr. Sanders heard me singing and um, well he uh,”

Logan gave his hand a small squeeze from under the table. He swallowed and finally finished.

“he cast me as the lead in our coming musical.”

Mimi and his mom stopped mid bite of soup, staring at him intently and he wanted to melt through the floor. They swallowed their mouthfuls and looked at each other before turning back to him with wide smiles. Suddenly Logan and Roman clasped their hands over their ears as the two started squealing at the top of their lungs, Mimi jumping out of her seat, jumping up and down. when they finally stopped screaming, Mimi was still bouncing and had Vivian’s hand in hers.

“oh my god Roman!!! Our baby boy oh I'm so so proud of you!!!!!”

“Roman sweetheart, that’s incredible!!! Wait, but weren’t auditions last week?”

“yeah, um, he just had me sing and dance again and he gave me the part.”

“Roman that’s incredible!!!!!!!!! Oh, I knew it!!! Didn’t I tell you Vivi? Didn’t I tell you that Ro was gonna be an incredible performer? I remember, I remember when I first saw him when he was an itty-bitty peanut that I told you he was gonna be a star in the showbiz!!! Oh, he's our little star oh I'm so proud!!!!!!”

“yes, babe I remember, calm down you are going to make him explode! Roman I really am so proud of you honey.”

“oh, oh oh!!! Roman you should sing for us!!! You always stop singing whenever either of us enter the room, I want to hear you sing!!! If you're ok of course, no pressure”

Roman’s face was the shade of an apple. His stepmom was always over the top with support, but this was more than he expected. He was about to nod when he heard Logan make a confused noise.

“am I really the only person who has heard him sing? He never stops singing its like his default mode! He's always making music whether through his fidgets or humming or singing, I don’t know how you guys have missed it!”

“I mean, I do my best to keep people from hearing me but you're sorta the exception. You're calm and you won’t like, smother me.”

“… well then. I also vote for a song.”

“hold on, lets get dinner ready first and then we can fully focus on him”

They had sat down with their plates and Roman was playing with his ring to keep him calm as 4 pairs of eyes stared at him waiting to hear him sing. Logan gave him a small smile and that was enough to help him start.

As the smile fell from your face, I fell with it Our faces blue There's a heart stain on the carpet I left it, I left it with you Yeah, the truth is that I'm sorry Though I told you not to worry I'm just some dumb kid Trying to kid myself That I got my shit together So go, get to runnin', won't you hurry? While it's light out, while it's early Before I start to miss any part of this And change my mind, whatever

Logan’s smile widened as he recognized the song. Remus mom and Mimi sat still, with looks of… awe? He was too nervous to analyze their expressions while he was singing. He continued on.

I say I wanna settle down Build your hopes up like a tower I'm giving you the run around I'm just a lost boy Not ready to be found Not ready to be found I'm just a lost boy Not ready to be found

He let his eyes close and his body sway to the song playing along in his head. He didn’t see the looks his moms gave each other, he didn’t see Remus shove Logan with a jealous look screaming that he was bitter he hadn’t heard him sooner. He was absorbed in the song.

I don't care much for locks on the window To keep me at bay I'll leave you one last kiss on your pillow Before I fly away Yeah we knew from the beginning That this wasn't never ending Shouldn't stay too long Cause we're both too young To give into forever

So what are you waiting for? Cause someone could love you more I'm just a lost boy, lost boy So what are you waiting for? Cause someone could love you more I'm just a lost boy, lost boy So what are you waiting for? Cause someone could love you more I'm just a lost boy, lost boy So what are you waiting for? Cause someone could love you more I'm just a lost boy, lost boy

Roman quickly finished the song and hesitantly opened his eyes. The amazed faces that they all had completely floored him. Mimi got out of her seat and surrounded him in a hug, which was objectively adorable due to her barely reaching his collarbone. Remus had an odd look on his face with a mixture of awe and curiosity. Mom sat with a wide grin on her face that matched Logan’s. He felt happy and at ease and calm. And he felt much better about his new part in the musical seeing his family filled with some interesting type of pride.

Taglist: @fivebyfive-finebyfive @tacohippy56900 @analogical-mess @crookedlyoptimisticdestiny @angels-and-dreams @fandomloverangel @demented-dukey @karmels-stuff @demented-dukey (sorry if you didn’t want to be tagged, you seemed interested in it)

Let me know if you want to be tagged in my writing!!!

Thank you for reading I will see you later ladies lords and nonbinary royalty!!!

#roman sanders #logan sanders #duke remus #remus sanders #2 original characters mentioned #rolorem triplets au #familial creativitwins #familial logince #familial lomus #ocxoc #tw swearing #tw cursing #tw anxiety #tw argument #tw self deprecation #my writing #my fanfiction #chapter 2

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simpinforyoongi · 4 years

Text

Good Bad Day ~

Collegestudent! Namjoon x Collegestudent!reader ~

(i know the pic doesn't suit this oneshot but i just can't omksks)

Pairing: Collegestudent!Namjoon x collegestudent!reader

Genre: Angst, attempted humour,

Warnings: swearing

Summary: When your bully-not-bully Namjoon takes it a bit too far on a day that already had been bad, you snap. But maybe this bad day wouldn't turn out to be so bad after all.

Sucked.

If you had to describe today in one word, it would, without doubt, be this. Today had simply sucked.

It sucked harder than that one exam you had to give about which you liTerAlLY came to know on the exam day itself. It sucked harder than that time when you missed your FRIgGIN school trip which you had been waiting for for MONTHS! And it sucked harder than the day you met Kim Namjoon. Yea. And oh boy is that a big statement.

Now,

Allow me to explain part 1:

[Dum dum dum flashback time brought to you byyyyyy 🍑 & 🍦, sweeter than sweet]

In simple words, Kim Namjoon was your bully. But also not exactly??? a bully?? because he didn't really "bully" you. Because if you actually take a minute to think about it, he never physically hurt you. Not gravely at least. But he also was your bully in the sense that he made every-freakin-day a struggle (more so than it already was). His usual acts where making snide remarks when you passed by and sometimes if he was feeling extra cheery, an intentional bump here and there, most of which you dodged skillfully. But that's about it. You didn't really bother replying because who's got that kind of time OR energy?? Not your lazy freaking ass for sure. You simply ignored him all day long, everyday.

How did he become your "bully" , you ask?? Well i suggest you read away!

Now let's get onto the second part,

Allow me to explain part 2:

[Dum dum dum flashback time brought to you byyyyy 🍫 cheeks & 🍫 🦋]

Today's morning was one of the prettiest of the week. Subtle sunlight seeped through your cremé curtains and fell on your face, giving you a sunkissed look and bringing out the color of your irises. You had woken up with a dreamy smile on your lips, obviously from the delicious dream that you had had, about how you were gonna spend your up and coming vacation, traveling and touring the world, seeking out all the gems that these places had to hide. Well, maybe not all the touring and stuff but books and the bed all day are just as thrilling, aren't they? AnYWaYS, so you had pulled your torso up and stretched out your limbs to free them off the stiffness that occurs from staying in bed just a tad too long, and glanced at the alarm clock.

That's where it started to go wrong.

You jUMped out of bed almost tripping yourself on the sheets (almost because you were always good at not falling. The Tripping God's have always been on your side) when you realised that in half an hour, your classes would start.

Then, you had two options:

1)To shower and be late but at least be fully awake. (not smelling like chicken wings and cheese was just a bonus) and

2) To not shower but be on time, but alSo be drowsy and risk running into a tree and going into a lifelong coma (that actually doesn't sound that bad).

You opted for the later because the almighty Gods have gifted you with some almiGhTy weapons for the existence and survival of human kind,

Coffee and Deodorant😎

Hah! Take that life! you had thought.

But life wasn't in the mood to humor you or your fantabulous sense of humour today.

Not showering always had its quirks you know. One of them being you had to brush out your bedhead without the help of any almighty weapons from the almighty Gods. So after actually managing to get ready without killing yourself after what seemed like an eternity of hair-brushing, you finally were ready to go.

But of course, it couldn't be so easy, could it?

One quick glance at your phone told you you had about 11 minutes to get to your class. 11 minutes to cover a path that took at least 18 minutes to cover when you were walking at your usual pace, earphones tucked in cozily.

10 minutes.

You hurriedly put your phone in your bag, put on your sneakers with shaky hands and broke into a run after locking the door.

You had been running for around 10 minutes and you had actually managed to almost reach your college gates. You could see the gates from where you stood, huffing and puffing while your lungs and ribs burned in hellfire. I'd suggest working out a little you know, if you have time.

So there it was, looking like the gates to heaven and calling your name. You again started walking and eventually running, without taking any notice of your shoe laces that had come undone and — thump

Remember how I told you that Tripping God's had always been on your side?? Yea well I think I spoke a little too soon.

You lied on the hard concrete , left cheek in contact with the floor,hands and legs were spread in a random manner.

You lifted yourself up with a frown, with the help of the base of your palms but immediately retracted your hands when your felt a sudden burning sensation.

Great. Simply great.

Both your hands had bruises on them, the left side of your jaw hurt, and there was a minute throbbing in your left side that was surely not from all the running.

But you didn't have time, so you got up, tied the laces and kept running.

But of course, it wasn't enough.

You reached your class ten minutes late. The lecture had already started and the professor was showing a PowerPoint presentation. You timidly knocked, attracting everyone's attention. Again, something that you gravely hated.

Luckily, you had somewhat of a reputation with the teachers. Being somewhat of a good girl had it perks you know. So you got off without any scolding from the professor, after she had asked you why you were late and you supplied the only thing that came to mind.

Woke up late, ma'am.

You took a seat and attempted noting down, but the bruises that you got on your hand were doing their job.

After somehow making it through the first lecture, you had a small gap before your second lecture. So you decided to get a coffee from the café on campus.

After getting said coffee, you were walking down one of the halls to your next class.

All your attention was on your coffee, your warm, coffee colored coffee that was waiting to be finished, which was why you didn't notice when a human pillar bumped into you, spilling all your coffee on yourself in the process.

You jumped when the warmth seeped through the fabric of your (luckily) black T-shirt, and looked up to see who was blind enough to bump into you when there was pLENTY of space to walk.

Uh-huh.

Wrong move.

There stood the devil himself, smirking down at your soaked self.

"I knew you were dumb. Didn't know you were blind too. Klutz" and with a smirk he just left you there without giving you the time to as much as glare at him for completely ruining your T-shirt AND spilling your coffee.

Your stood there in your coffee soaked clothes and teary eyes. But you blinked them away. You won't cry. It's just a bad day. It's just a bad day.

The atrocities didn't stop there. Throughout the day, many joyous things happened.

While going to your third lecture, you missed a step and landed right on your knees, on the sharp edge of another step. And that freaking hurt, believe me.

Then, you managed to trip again, on a freaking pebble, and landed on your palms again, on the freaking gravel. Needless to say, your bruises were increasing with every step you took. The Tripping God's really weren't in a good mood today.

Because of that, you were also late to your fourth lecture, one of the classes that you actually really loved.

One of the classes that had Kim Namjoon in them.

You couldn't concentrate on what the professor was saying because of the constant bickering of Namjoon who sat on the next row. Not being able to tolerate his shit today, you decided to just lay your head down and hopefully get some shut-eye. The professor surely won't notice you in a room full of people, right?

Wrong.

Absofuckinlutely wrong.

You woke up not five minutes later to the tapping of a pen against your desk.

You jumped when you saw the oh so familiar face of your English Lit professor peering down at you.

"Something wrong? Ms. Y/l/n?" He said, pretty seriously, contradicting the usual light hearted mood that the 50 year old was in. Maybe he had a bad day too.

"No sir. I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

"Glad to know." and with that, he walked away. As he did, you noticed a snickering Namjoon, and the possibility of him telling the professor about you occurred to you. But you really just didn't have the energy to speak up about it.

Your fifth and last lecture for the day had finally ended, resulting in you being in a slightly better mood than before.

You were packing your things up. The day had sucked. Everything that happened today was bad. And the fact that you would be getting your results the following week was making you even more stressed. You didn't do your best on the last set of exams, and you were low-key freaking out, but still out of energy to react too much.

With the throbbing ever present in your left side, and the bruises still on your knees and palms still burning, you made your way to the exit of the room.

But life really just couldn't stop itself from kicking you in the guts one last time.

"Hey there, klutz." Standing near the door was your arch nemesis, to put it dramatically, Kim Namjoon, with his group of six friends. Now the weird thing about them was, that they seemed to be cool people. And your first impression of Kim Namjoon was that he was a good, studious and kind boy. You even admired him for his hard work and philosophical essays that your English professor always read out to the class when he scored full marks. But what you didn't expect him to be was a bitchy, annoying and stuck up piece of shit who bullied others(or tried to) without any reason.

"Not today, Kim." You were in no mood today, the day had already been bad enough and you didn't need another one of his snide remarks today.

"Why y/n?? Too tired from sleeping in class??" He commented, as your tried to walk past him, but he followed.

"Hey! Don't ignore me, I'm hurt!!" He said in a mocking tone.

You kept walking, not paying mind to his ramblings, but it was getting harder by the minute.

"I really wonder why our English prof let you off without any punishment when you were sleeping you know. He doesn't usually go that easy on sleeping students. Makes me wonder what you were doing last night."

You stopped dead in your tracks and slowly turned around with a menacing glare. There were still students around and they had heard him, and they stopped all their antics to watch the scene unfold.

Your mind was already heavy from an the shit that happened today, and you were already on the verge of breaking down because of all the pressure that you were under, and this last comment really just hit. You eyes started becoming blurry from the accusation that was just thrown at you, and all these things led to where you are now,in front of Kim Namjoon with blurry eyes, unable to comprehend everything that was happening.

Before you could actually change your mind and walk away, you took a step ahead and spoke with more remorse than anything else.

"WHAT did you just say??" Your voice was laced with venom and this caused him to take a step back. Everyone was watching, but you couldn't care less. This has to stop.

"What did you just say??" You repeated your question. "WHAT did I ever do to you Kim Namjoon?? WHY do you hate me so much?? WHY are you so dead set on making my already difficult life even more difficult?? WHY do you do this?? I already have dealt with enough shit from you! What the fu-k do you think you're doing? Who the fu-k do you think you are and why the fu-k are you always bothering me??" Your eyes were still blurry, but as a single tear flowed down your cheek, the venom in your voice dissipated and all that was left was hurt.

"What did I ever do to you?? Why do you hate me?? Just because I got one fucking mark more than you in one fucking subject?? Because Mr.Song decided that it wouldn't hurt to appreciate my English essays?? Because your ego was hurt that someone other than you was also appreciated by a teacher?? WHAT WAS my fault?? You have made my life goddamned hard and I didn't even do anything to you!" By now both your cheeks were wet from tears streaking down your face and your eyes were red and puffy,the same eyes that shone brightly whenever your answers were correct, or whenever someone says something funny(not that Namjoon noticed or anything). As you kept taking, his eyes travelled to your left cheek, then jaw and he noticed the bruises that were on display. He also remembered how you were not writing anything in class today. Everyone, including Namjoon was utterly dumbfounded by your sudden outburst.

Is she hurt?

"..didn't even get enough time to get my shit together before your started ruining everything for me! I genuinely thought that you were a good, hard working student and i admired you for that!! But THANK YOU for shattering this illusion! THANK YOU for letting be know what a shitty stuck up brat you are! I told you to leave me alone but NO! First you spilled my coffee on me, and now you're accusing me of filthy actions. Do I look like A JOKE TO YOU?? Do I LOOK LIKE SOMEONE YOU CAN JUST PUSH OVER? I try my best to shrug off everything you say but everyone has a limit Namjoon. I know I'm not smart like you, I'm don't ace every test, I'm not the teachers favorite student, I can't do everything right, I always try my best but sometimes it's not enough, and I don't always look my best, i KNOW i look like shit sometimes and I fucking. Know. that I'm not perfect but you don't have to remind me everytime! " Your lips quivered as you spoke your heart. You took a deep breath, your eyes seemed to be overflowing today and you couldn't stop your feelings from flowing out too, while he stood there, eyes wide.

"I hate you Kim Namjoon. I fucking hate you! And I don't want to see your disgusting face ever again!" You hissed, and then speed walked away, leaving a very shocked group of people and a very regretful Namjoon.

The following week, you were happy to almost get rid of his presence. Almost

Because the lingering stares that he threw your way were not going unnoticed.

You thought the students were going to start acting weird after your little outburst the other day but luckily, everyone seemed to have forgotten about it. Or they just didn't care enough which is absolutely fine!!

But the constant feeling of being stared at was there.

Throughout the week, you had completely avoided Namjoon. Like sitting as far as possible in the classes you shared, leaving as soon as you caught his sight, and once even crossing the road to get away from him. And somehow you had made it to the end of the week. It was Friday again. And once you got through with the day, you wouldn't have to see his face for another 2 months.

You couldn't wait.

But again, like Deja Vu, as you collected all your belongings and walked towards the exit of the room, you saw him and his gang standing looking right at you.

He had tried to approach you earlier today. About 3 times actually, but you had deftly avoided any type of conversation. You just didn't want anything to do with him.

You searched for ways to escape but the only exit was the door where they were standing.

You took a deep breath and kept walking.

"Y/n please just talk to me once. I'm really sorry about everything please just give me a chance y/n I'll just take five minutes of your time, please. I request you."

You kept walking, even more swiftly than you were before.

"Please just give me a chance, y/n please." He followed you and just as you were about to exit, one of his friends blocked the door, and your only way of escaping. You had seen him around. Not just because he hung around Namjoon, but because he was a junior and quite famous too. You could see why girls swooned over his group of friends. Each and every guy, including the bunny looking boy blocking the door, was gorgeous af.

"Please y/n noona, just let him speak to you. He hasn't been eating or sleeping well these days." The bunny boy exclaimed, and for a moment your heart softened for like a teeny weeny second, but you didn't acknowledge his request.

"Please move." You said in a stern voice. But he didn't of course.

"Look, we know what happened last time he talked to you. But he really had been moping around all fu-king week over this and honestly it's starting to become bothersome. Of what I've seen and heard of you, you seem to be a logical person. Don't you think it'd be easier and faster if you just heard whatever he has to say and then went about your way?" The one who had a constant poker face, not to sure but you had heard people call him Yoongi, said. You contemplated for a moment, and deciding that it's better to get this over with, you turned around to face Namjoon. After all, you were a pretty logical person (😎)

"What?"

As you asked the question, Namjoon was ready to spill everything, every thought he had over the past week, every feeling, every apology. But for some reason, nothing came out of his mouth. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, unable to form sentences.

You tried raising an eyebrow, but couldn't since you couldn't master the art of raising single eyebrows, then looked back at his friends who seemed just as confused as you.

"Are your going to say anything or should I just leave?"

At that he started talking.

"I'm really sorry for everything that i did.." his eyes were cast downwards, "I've been a jerk and I honestly don't know why I did that..i had no reason to and I'm really sorry from the depths of my heart I...I just.." he couldn't comprehend what to say to explain how bad he felt.

"Ok. Fine. Its fine. Apology accepted." And with that, you moved across bunny boy and walked away. This time, nobody stopped you but Namjoon wasn't satisfied as he stared at your retreating form.

"But why would she forgive me that easily?? Urghhh" Namjoon was about to pull all his hair out in frustration. You were weird, he knew, but like...what the chocolate brownie fudge?? Nobody just walks off like that after being bothered for so long.

"Yah why are you beating yourself up over this?? Maybe she didn't want to waste any more time over you. Stop overthinking it." Jin exclaimed, already fed up of Namjoons continuous stomping.

"But hyung why wo-"

"Or maybe she likes you. Maybe that's why she forgave you so easily. Maybe she had been crushing on you and that's why she was hurt. mAYBE she's in love with you.Is that what you want to hear, Namjoon??" Yoongi said nonchalantly and Namjoon's face flared up as everyone looked at him.

"W-WHAT ARE YOU SAYING HYUNG.. s-she doesn't like me and i don't like her... Its just.."

"YAH JUST OFFER HER A COFFEE YOU IDIOT" Jin yelled, rather exasperatedly, because man was Namjoon being a pill right then!

He pondered over the suggestion for a moment. He did spill your coffee on you. And you seem to like coffee quite a bit. Maybe that wasn't such a bad idea for an apology. Well, second apology.

So there he was, standing in front of the bookstore that you worked at, still debating whether he should just go in or go home. His friends were standing a bit behind him, still more than annoyed that he dragged all of them over here. As he was wrecking his mind on the pros and cons, the doors opened and you came out with your earphones in your ears and a small smile on your lips.

As soon as you locked eyes, your smile disappeared. But you didn't say anything. Rather, you walked right by him. This was like the last time all over.

"Y/n w-wait.. could we talk for a minute??" You weren't planning on stopping but his voice sounded so small and fragile that you couldn't force your feet to move. His face seemed thinner and drained of energy.

It surely wouldn't hurt to hear him out last time. Yes. Last time

You stopped and he continued.

"I-I um... Do you.. do you want to out for coffee with me?? I i.. I mean like..umm..as an apology.. Can i offer you a coffee as an apology?? If you don't mind?? I just.. I've been feeling really guilty these days and the fact that you forgave me even though i treated you so badly had been eating away and i just can't seem to-"

"No" was all you said. Is this man serious?? First he treats you like you're a piece of trash and then he's apologising and asking you out?? I mean.. the he-k?? Is he kidding?

"But y/n please let me treat your to a coffee I'm really really sorry....."

As you started to walk away, again, he couldn't help but sigh and look down again. Of course you said no. Who would even accept a coffee as an apology?? He should've just not showed his face ever ag-

"Y/n noona there's this fair that is in town. We're gonna go there tomorrow. Do you wanna come??" Jimin said suddenly before you could completely disappear out of sight. He just couldn't bear seeing Namjoon looking like a kicked puppy any longer.

"Wh-"

"BEFORE you say no," he continued, "Don't you think it's better to go to the fair with all of us" he pointed at himself and his five other friends with a twinkle in his eyes, "than going to a voting coffee shop with Namjoonie hyung and listening to his boring philosophical lectures?? Huh? Huh?? That way, hyung would be guilt free too and you can have some fun too! Besides we never did anything to you noona! Let's be friends?? Please??"

Ok boy you gotta admit these guys have some serious convincing skills. Besides, the boy had a point. Even though they never said anything to Namjoon when he made comments on you, but they might have says something when you weren't around..? And even though limited, the interactions that you had with the boys were sweet.

You weren't quite sure why, maybe it was Jimin's sugary sweet smile that was compelling you to say yes, or maybe it was something else. Something you couldn't quite figure out.

But after thinking for sometime and seeing Namjoon's hopeful expression, you said yes.

Maybe it wouldn't hurt to make some new friends. Maybe this bad day won't turn out so bad after all.

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winryofresembool · 5 years

Photo

Matilda’s story

Summary: Emma Rockbell-Elric’s (aka Ed&Winry’s daughter) girlfriend Matilda writes about different periods of her life, from accepting her sexuality to meeting and getting together with Emma.

A/N: Don’t worry guys, Edwin is on its way too! But I thought it would be fun to introduce you guys to one of my OC ships, aka Emilda :’) I imagine Matilda is writing this story to people who are in a lot of self doubt (about their sexuality etc), to make them feel better about their situation.

Words: 1950ish

Warnings: some adult themes mentioned, nothing explicit

...

Matilda’s POV:

This is going to be a very personal story, but maybe sharing it will help someone reading it.

When I was a kid, I always preferred stories that had cool girl protagonists instead of boys. Blegh. They were just annoying. My favorite bands were girl bands and my favorite movie stars were also women. It hadn’t even occurred to me that some girls could like /boy bands/. Well, I was a kid, so it didn’t matter what I liked and what not. Our tastes were still developing, after all.

When I was 11, a girl friend of mine kissed me on the cheek, probably as a thank you for something I had done. I couldn’t forget about it for a week, and I didn’t understand why. Now I know better: the little Matilda had her first crush. But that wasn’t an option to the 11-year-old me. When I told my mum I thought a friend of mine looked cute, in an innocent way, she told me to be quiet and made me play with a neighbor’s son. I didn’t like that kid at all, by the way. He was constantly pulling my hair and claimed I looked like a “lesbeean” in my pink clothes. I had no idea what that word meant. That was the way I had been raised.

I grew older and the friends around me started getting boyfriends. My mum was constantly asking if I had one too. I felt there was something wrong with me because I didn’t want one! After she had asked me that same old question many times enough, I finally gave up and asked a male friend of mine if we could go on a date. He said yes, and all of a sudden I had my first boyfriend. He was actually fairly nice, and we did like the same kind of movies, so picking a date spot was pretty easy. But it didn’t take him long to say he knew I didn’t like him that way. He was right, though, and so I experienced my first “break up”.

After a while, I started feeling the pressure of getting another boyfriend. The same thing happened as with the previous guy; we broke up due to the lack of chemistry.

Life went on, but the dating life started getting more challenging: I was already 18 and the people around me had a sex life. I had such a hard time imagining me doing it, and I even thought at one point I might have been an ace. Then I met a guy I genuinely liked and decided: “heck it. It’s not a big deal, so let’s just get it done.” And so we did. And it was absolutely awful. I blamed the fact that it was my first time, because of course I had heard that it’s supposed to hurt and all that stuff. But in reality, it was more than that. I felt extremely uncomfortable, awkward, vulnerable, even scared. I felt like I shouldn’t have been there, I just wanted to leave as soon as it started!

Well, it’s safe to say it didn’t happen with that guy again. He was surprisingly understanding when I tried to explain my feelings, though, and he too suggested I might be a-sexual. I just admitted: yeah, it’s possible. However, I had started doubting that because one time, when I went to get a casual cup of coffee with this same ex boyfriend of mine, I noticed that our heads were turning in the same direction when a good looking woman passed us. I had tried to deny it, but it was getting harder: I was attracted to women.

The time at the university was a new beginning to me. I met a lot of people. New, more open minded people. I finally learned to accept that women loving women really was a thing, and it opened a new world to me. I let myself have crushes, and sometimes when things got “wild”, I might even have kissed another woman. My mother’s conservative voice was nagging in my head regularly, but I learned to tune it down.

But there was one specific encounter that I will never forget. In my first architecture class I saw a pretty, blonde haired and blue eyed girl. She seemed shy at first, dressed in black, avoiding eye contact, trying to make her already small frame even smaller. But then the professor started asking questions and suddenly she woke up, a fire in her eyes when she started debating with the professor on some topic that was so advanced I didn’t even understand it. And I had always thought I knew plenty about architecture. The debate had to end at some point so the professor could go back to her regularly scheduled teaching, but the girl stayed in the classroom afterwards and continued the conversation. I was both impressed and intimidated by her.

It turned out, that was definitely not the last time I saw that girl. Not too long after, I was put into the same group with her when we were doing group assignments and – we got into a fight. As I had suspected from the moment I saw her, our ideas of architecture in general were so different that we had a very hard time finding a common ground. She thought alchemy could make everything 100% easier, I claimed it was hocus pocus. Our fight got so bad that at the end of one group session she told me she would talk to the professor the next day and ask to join another group.

She never got that far though; that same night my cat went missing and I was searching for him from the campus area for a long while. Finally, I found him in a tree, but he didn’t want to come down. I tried treats, I tried toys, but no luck. I was too afraid to climb after him because I was sure the branches would have broken under my weight. Suddenly, the blonde girl appeared and asked me what was wrong. I showed her the cat on the tree and without hesitation she started climbing like a ninja. At that point I was wondering if there was anything that girl couldn’t do. She caught my kitty and brought him down to me, acting like a whole different person compared to a couple of hours earlier. I asked why she was like that, and she simply said “what happens in the classroom, stays in the classroom”.

I decided to invite this weird girl for a cup of tea as a thank you for saving my cat and because I felt there was so much about her I didn’t know yet. She had made me so curious. We had a lot of fun talking about anything non school related, and she didn’t leave for several hours. I introduced her to my cats, and she showed pics of her dog. When she was finally leaving, she tugged my hair a bit, looked straight into my eyes, and said “you’re not so bad, after all, Kitty.” Someone else might have gotten offended, but I saw her expression, and knew it was her way of saying “we are friends now, like it or not.” Oh, and she didn’t change her group after all.

It would be nice to say my relationship issues were over once I started uni, but that’s not true. I wasn’t really seeing anyone for a long while, while my friendship with Emma deepened, starting some rumors among the people around me. Eventually, my mum heard I may be seeing a girl from the uni and she called me home for a talk. I took Emma with me, or rather, she insisted she come. With her support, I told her that yes, I may be into girls, but no, we are not dating. My mother wasn’t happy with that announcement, telling me I was not welcome back home unless I “changed my mind about women”. Emma dragged me into her car, but she herself went back to tell a couple of well-chosen words to my mother, and when she came back, she was having a devilish smile on her face. She claimed that habit was simply in her Elric blood, which I soon realized was true when she introduced me to her family. They were incredible people, so different from my family. Getting distance between me and my parents was not an easy decision, but it’s one I now understand was necessary for my happiness.

A couple of years later, another incident happened: I was on the swimming team and one day decided to train with Emma, who, while not as fast as I am, made up for it with her stamina. Unfortunately, some guys from the men’s team were at the hall at the same time with us, and one of them started hitting on me. I had a hard time getting rid of him because he kept insisting I should go out with him, even blocking my way at one point. It started getting quite scary, so Emma, bless her, came to my rescue. She wrapped her arm around my waist and planted a kiss on my cheek, claiming I was her girlfriend, and if the guys wanted to have something to do with me, she’d be ready to fight. I have no doubt she would. I have heard stories of her dad’s past…

Anyway, one of the assholes said he wanted more proof so Emma didn’t hesitate. She kissed me straight on the mouth and I kept seeing stars for a minute. Once the stars were gone, I noticed we were already in the shower room (apparently Emma had dragged me there) and she apologized for acting like that. I think my answer was just incoherent blabbering, because honestly, I was just wishing she would do it again. Because in that moment I knew I was in love with Emma Rockbell-Elric.

A few years went by and I was in a constant state of suffering because I could not tell her how I felt. I had seen Emma flirting with a lot of other people, both girls and boys, so I was positive the kiss had not meant anything, and I couldn’t risk our friendship. But eventually, we decided to go on a trip, just the two of us, and little did we know that trip would change everything. It all started innocently. We were supposed to just go down to the hotel bar for a couple of drinks and maybe dance a bit, but… something turned off in my brain. Before I knew it, we were kissing, and back in our room, and… it was the best evening of my life. But then… then she broke my heart.

Now, Emma, if you’re reading this, don’t worry. I know why you did what you did, and you’ve been forgiven a long time ago. Maybe I just added that here to remind people that relationships require work, because no one is perfect, but we did solve our issues, and everything’s better than fine now. We are now living together and having our own kids, aka our pets. Thanks to my girlfriend, I’ve learned to accept myself the way I am, and I have also found myself a new supportive family who really cares about me, and is there for me when I need it. So, my message to people in need of help is: it will get better. Just be who you are, because you’re amazing. That’s what Emma tells me.

Ps. to my dog loving alchemy freak girlfriend: I love you.

#emilda #my fics #emma rockbell elric #oc matilda #fullmetal alchemist #my oc:s #edwin #sorta

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pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles · 6 years

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Like A River (Girls Talk Boys part 17)

Shut your mouth, baby stand and deliver Holy hands, oh they make me a sinner Like a river, like a river Shut your mouth and run me like a river

Choke this love till the veins start to shiver One last breath till the tears start to wither Like a river, like a river Shut your mouth and run me like a river

(A/N this is a longer chapter than usual. I seriously considered splitting it into two but I couldn’t do it)

18+ label on this one for sexual language and situations

Previous Chapter

Chapter One

The pounding on his front door jolted Calum awake. Why was he on his couch?

“I'M COMING” he yelled and the knocking ceased.

He blinked still confused until it all came back in a rush.

The Halloween party, Cher, Camille, the alarm, finding Duke asleep next to a purse.

Calum got up and headed towards the door.

Michael's text, Ameena's anger then the tears, Camille's hurt, going back to the party, finding out Camille had ended up in bed with -

He opened his front door. Ashton was waiting. “Last night was shit, and tonight is gonna be shit if we don't clear the air” Ashton hugged him.

“Calum?” A voice called out from upstairs.

Ashton looked at him incredulous “Ameena's still here?”

Calum nodded “she cried herself to sleep on the couch.”

“Of course she did” Ashton snapped.

“Calum who the fuck was at the door? Oh Ashton it's just you. Got your chubby little girlfriend with you?” Ameena let out a sharp bitter laugh as she narrowed her eyes at him.

“Just so you know I don't want you in my house ever again. Last night was uncalled for, you embarrassed and insulted my friends.” Ashton glared at her while Ameena smirked.

“Whatever works right?” She asked

“Not this time Ameena” Calum spoke up, his voice weary and harsh from a restless night and too many cigarettes. “I can't do this anymore. Last night was just pointless. It didn't accomplish anything except embarrass me and make me realize how tired of all of this I really am. I have tried to be nice about this because I really loved you once. Right now I just need you to get anything that's yours out of my condo, give me back your key and leave.” Ameena and Ashton both stood there stunned and speechless. “You have 15 minutes I suggest you hurry” Calum snapped, cooly turning his back to Ameena as he headed into the kitchen to make some coffee.

Ameena stormed back up to the bedroom and slammed the door. Calum could hear her cursing and banging of drawers. Duke came barreling down the stairs to hide under the couch. Calum poured a cup of coffee with a splash of milk . He nodded towards the machine but Ashton shook his head.

“Look Cal about last night” Ashton started.

“Not right now” Calum shook his head. “Wait until she leaves.”

Ashton shot him a look “you ok man?”

“I will be” Calum sighed looking at his watch. Grabbing his coffee mug he walked back into the living room. They could still hear Ameena upstairs. Calum walked over to the closet grabbed two jackets one grey leather, one red suede. Reaching down he grabbed a small pair of rain boots and a large duffel bag. He laid the jackets on the bottom and put the boots in a plastic bag on top. He went into the downstairs bathroom and snagged her emergency makeup bag.

As Ameena was coming down the stairs with two full travel bags. Calum was gathering up framed photos, things she'd bought him, and anything in sight he knew belonged to her and putting it in the bag.

“You're really fucking serious” Ameena started to sniffle.

“You can cry if you want but just go. We're going out for breakfast. We'll follow you out so I can make sure you give back your parking pass.” Calum's voice was flat and emotionless.

Ameena let a tear fall but when Calum met her eyes with no reaction she switched tactics

“Ashton must be disappointed you're going through with this. Now he has to give up your whore.” Ameena's voice was pure venom.

“Don't call her that” Ashton spoke up pushing himself off the wall.

“Of course you'd come to her defense. I saw the pics on Lucy's IG you two were all over each other last night” Ameena lashed out only finding the tiniest hint of satisfaction watching Calum's jaw twitch slightly.

“Your key” Calum held his hand out. Ameena pulled it off her key ring and threw it against the wall. Calum calmly took her key ring out of her hand removed the actual key, handed her the bag he'd packed and pointed towards the door.They watched as Ameena walked to her car and peeled away. They caught up to her at the security gate. Ameena pulled the parking sticker off her window and handed it to the attendant. She flipped Calum and Ashton off behind her and sped away.

Calum and Ashton sat down across from each other in the booth. Both ordered near identical breakfasts of eggs, bacon, toast and hash browns. Ashton added on a side of pancakes while Calum got a fruit cup.

Waiting for their food Ashton took his phone out and handed it to Cal. He already had Lucy's Instagram page up and Calum scrolled through the pictures. Sure enough there were Ashton and Camille wrapped around each other. Camille hanging on his arm while they played beer pong. Ashton behind Camille with his arms wrapped around her waist while they danced. Then a video of the pass the ice cube game with Camille in between Harry and Ashton. Calum handed his phone back to him.

“So what happened?” Calum asked him.

“After you left Camille was trying to hold it together but then she started to cry.” Ashton's voice wavered slightly. “I chose to stay by her the whole time and try and salvage her night. Yeah we got flirty and yeah we had a cheeky little kiss and a few cuddles. The whole time she's looking around for you.”

Calum closed his eyes and dropped his head into his hands. “Don't you dare feel bad. Ameena went psycho and I'm so proud of the way you handled her today.” Ashton told him placing a hand on Cal's shoulder. He pulled back when the server brought their food.

“Cal look at me. What is it? Talk to me please.” Ashton was worried about his best friend.

“This has been so hard. The fighting with Ameena, this shit with Camille fucking hell maybe I should walk away from both of them and just start over.” Calum shrugged and looked away.

“Are you fucking serious? Is that really what you want?” Ashton couldn't believe what he was hearing.

“I don't know ok I don't fucking know ok” Calum's voice went up and people began to look their way.

“Cal it's ok I'm here for you. We'll get you through this.” Now Ashton was really worried.

“I'm just exhausted. I don't know anything anymore.” Calum looked away and began eating. Ashton followed his lead shoveling food into his mouth while keeping an eye on Calum.

“So why did Camille sleep in your bed?” Calum asked.

“Camille was absolutely shitfaced and I was afraid she would turn into a crying mess. I don't know if you heard everything Ameena said to her but it had Camille rattled. Cody split and Cher left to shag Spongebob. I was literally the only guy who didn't bring a date left to see to her. I gave her a pair of pajamas and we slept in the same bed. Nothing happened, all we did was talk about you.” Ashton told him.

“Do you like her?” Another question from Calum.

“Listen to me” Ashton leaned in and looked Calum in the eye. “I adore Camille, but not in the way you do and you of all people know I'm interested in someone else. Camille and I are very good friends who bonded over wanting something we couldn't have. Why are you so worried about it anyways? You know I would never go behind your back.”

“That's the craziest thing about all of this. You know I've never been the jealous or possessive type. I mean that fight I got into with Brandon was because he put hands on Ameena and wouldn't stop. With Camille it's this violent rush of emotion. The second day she was here I got jealous over her and my brain has been fucked ever since.” Calum rubbed his eyes.

“Go home get some rest. Tonight we're all going out to Harry's club. You and Camille can kiss and make up. We can all relax and have a good night.” Ashton smiled at him picking up the check.

Calum kicked off his shoes and headed upstairs to shower. He let the water pour over his skin and soothe his nerves when out of nowhere all the pent up stress and emotion he'd bottled up came crashing down on him in waves. Unable to hold back Calum broke down and cried.

First came sadness tinged with regret. Even though it all went wrong Ameena had been his first love and they'd had some wonderful times together. His mother would call tomorrow after word got back to her from one of her best friends aka Ameena's mom. He felt guilty about the disruption it would cause in other people's lives. He gave himself up to the tears, no longer trying to hold them back. There was the relief being done with a relationship that had long since turned toxic. Sobs racked his shoulders as the frustration and anger hit him. He'd hurt everyone by not having the strength to end it with Ameena months ago or at the very least in Europe. He was furious Ameena had lashed out at Camille and hurt her and panicked that Camille might not think he was worth the trouble after being publicly insulted twice.

Camille. Camille. Camille. Fucking hell. He sniffled regaining control again. He washed his face and hair, gave himself a quick tug and finished up his shower routine. He padded to his room naked using the towel to dry his hair. His room was a mess. Ameena had dumped clothes everywhere. Nothing was broken but she'd taken a few things that weren't hers.

The cologne she'd bought him last Christmas. His green hoodie was swiped and she took the damn candle. For some reason that cracked him up. There he was fully nude, laughing his ass off in the middle of his wrecked bedroom. Duke who'd been sleeping on his bed was staring at Calum as if he'd lost his mind. Maybe he had. He realized he needed to get some sleep if he were going out tonight. It was 1pm there was plenty of time. He crawled into bed and Duke snuggled in for a nap. He could leave the mess for tomorrow. Calum wondered if Camille would even want to be around him never mind actually have sex with him now.

It was Retro Rewind at The Chelsea which meant the music was all 80's, 90's and early 2000's. Britney Spears’ Toxic was playing as Camille and Cher showed up with Harry and his date Kaye along with Lucy and Tom.

Harry was rocking one of his trademark suits. This one was purple paisley over a white shirt unbuttoned halfway down his chest. Kaye coordinated in a cute lilac mini dress. Tom went with a more casual look burgundy button up and black jeans. Lucy was a stunner in a bright blue swinging halter dress alongside him.

Cher wore black denim shorts a white tank top and a blue and green tie dye duster with black combat boots. Her hair was up in two twisty buns like mouse ears.

Camille had a root touch up that morning but they hadn't put the color back in so instead of pink hair it was platinum blonde worn loose and wavy. She was wearing a red leather mini skirt and a black corset top that gave her cleavage up to her chin. Black knee high lace up boots and bright red lipstick completed the look.

Camille had never been in the VIP lounge before. The Chelsea went all out. Overlooking the club there was a separate bar just for them, bottle service, plush couches, a dancing pole in case anyone felt daring enough and even a private bathroom so one didn't have to mingle with the peasants just to pee. Even a separate entrance/exit for celebrity guests.

“If you'd told me 4 months ago we'd end up in the VIP of The Chelsea as personal guests of Harry Styles I would've slapped you and called you a liar.” Cher leaned into Camille handing her a margarita.

“I know right?” Camille laughed and shook her head. They heard a commotion behind them. Camille whipped her head around but it was just Lucy's brother and a couple Tom's friends.

“Waiting for someone?” Cher raised her eyebrows.

“Shut up” Camille poked her.Just then as if on cue the music changed and the boys appeared.

What a man, what a man, what a man,

What a mighty good man

Gotta say it again now

What a man, what a man, what a man

Camille smacked Cher in the arm as both of them tried not to be too obvious. Holy fucking hell they all looked incredibly sexy.

Michael was in his usual look. Black skinnies, high necked black and white shirt, black coat and boots, rings and glasses.

Luke was killing it with his red shirt showing off plenty of his chest, matching nails, skin tight black trousers and silver glitter boots. Both dates dressed to match with Crystal in black and silver shorts and a crop top and Summer in a black catsuit trimmed in bright red.

Ashton was cheeky in a pink silk short sleeved top and black pants and boots. His gold necklaces glinted against his exposed skin.

Camille’s eyes landed on Calum and she couldn't breathe. His hair was curly and in his eyes which in itself was enough to make her melt. He had on the black long sleeve button up with white pinstripes, black skinny jeans that made his ass look extra cute and boots. Camille licked her lips and tried to calm her racing pulse. Blushing furiously she had to look away certain the entire room could read her thoughts.

Lucy came over to grab them so they could dance and Camille snapped out of her trance. A much as she wanted Calum after last night he had to make a move.

Calum and Ashton took a shot and then grabbed a beer before looking around the room. Lucy and Tom had their usual crew. Cher looked adorable with her hair up. Calum didn't know the curvy blonde girl Cher was talking to as he glanced away searching for Camille before it clicked in his brain.

His throat went dry and he couldn't swallow. Camille usually dressed modestly rarely trying for overly sexy, so to see her dressed so blatantly provocative caught him by surprise. Calum wasn't the only one appreciating her new look as what appeared to be Lucy's brother hovered nearby.

Calum scowled at him and sat down on one of the couches to gather up the courage liquid or otherwise to approach Camille. Camille saw Calum frown at her and decided against trying to talk to him if he was in a bad mood. Besides Drew, Lucy's brother, was pleasant enough for the time being. Although he was drinking at an alarming rate and Camille sensed he wasn't a pretty drunk. For right now she was gonna drink and dance with Tom and Lucy.

Cher didn't hesitate to make her way over to the guys. As the couples had separated from Ashton and Cal, Cher headed that way.

“What's up Cool Guy Cal and Mr Bravo” Cher giggled.

“Hey pretty lady why don't you sit next to me” Ashton was quick with a joke. Cher settled in between them for a chat and a drink.

Calum chugged his beer and ordered another. Cher raised her eyebrows. “A little liquid courage never hurt” he told her sheepishly.

“For fucks sake Calum just go talk to her” Cher was exasperated.

“She looks busy” Calum pouted watching Camille dance with Dan? Dave? Drew? Drew, that's it. He looked like a fucking Drew.

Camille was absolutely sick of Drew and had finally screwed up her courage to go talk to Calum bad mood or not. She leaned in to whisper in Lucy's ear telling her she'd be back when she felt strong arms wrap around her waist. She squirmed to get away but Drew wasn't letting go.

“C'mon Camille let's dance” he slurred in her ear thrusting against her.

“Drew knock it off you're drunk” Lucy smacked her brother's arm to no avail.

Camille tried to get away but he was locked on to her. Until he wasn't. Suddenly she was free and Drew was on the floor. She turned around confused to find Calum enraged and standing over Drew.

“That's my girl. If you touch her again it'll be the last thing your ever do.” Calum's voice was tight and controlled and no one doubted he meant what he said.

Camille's jaw dropped as Calum stalked past her into the bathroom trailed by Ashton and Lucy's friend.Seconds later Camille pushed into the bathroom.Calum was leaned up against the wall with Ashton on one side and Lucy's friend Jessica hovering trying to touch him but he shrugged her off.

“Can you give us some privacy” Camille asked.Ashton moved towards the door Jessica continued to hover.

“Get out” Camille snapped at her and she scurried off behind Ashton.

“What the shit Hood?” Camille was standing inches from him. “Last night you leave with your girlfriend and never come back and now you wanna act like I belong to you. You can't have it both ways.”

“I packed Ameena's shit this morning. Took her key and her parking pass. Its over and done. I don't want it both ways. I only want to have you.” Calum's face was just inches from Camille's.

“So take me” Camille raised up on her toes and snaked her hand to the back of his neck pulling him in for a kiss.Calum's hands dug into her waist as his mouth met hers. Camille's melted under the soft yet demanding feel of Calum's lips against hers. His tongue finding its way to battle with hers as they clung to each other battling for dominance while submitting to desire all at once.Camille reached down to rub his hard cock through his pants while passionately kissing him with so much hunger that Calum falls back against the bathroom stall door.

He pulls back “Are you sure this is what you want? You really want to do this here in a bathroom?” Calum searches her face for any sign of hesitation.

Camille stares back at him. “Every time I hesitate something gets in my way. I don't care where it happens. I just want you.”

Calum smirked before yanking her hair back and attacking her neck. Kissing, biting and licking his way across her throat sending shivers down her spine. His hand slid into her shirt twisting her nipple between his fingers causing Camille to cry out. Camille grabbed his cheeks kissing him fiercely as her hands clawed at his belt.

“You don't have to” Calum told her.

“Oh but I want to” Camille gave him a wicked grin causing his heartbeat to quicken before she ducked onto her knees and her mouth was on his cock. Swirling her tongue around the tip while gazing up at him Camille savored the moment before taking his length down her throat. Calum grunted and tried to grab her hair but she swatted his hands away. Camille set her own pace using her hands to pump and twist while she sucked him off. She used her fingers and tongue in ways Calum hadn't experienced before making it impossible for him to speak. The strained moans coming from his throat sent shivers to her core. “Oh shit” Calum threw his head back against the stall his fingers unable to resist tangling in her hair as Camille made him cum down her throat. Calum's knees went weak and he looked up at Camille who stood up and wiped her mouth with a very satisfied smirk.

“You're in so much trouble now” Calum told her grabbing her wrist. He used one hand to hold her wrists behind her back while the other slid up her thigh and under her skirt. Camille gasped as she felt him move her panties to the side and one of his long fingers slide into her slowly. She hissed as he moved excruciatingly slow pulling out then adding another finger and sliding back in. “Please don't tease” Camille whimpered.

“As you wish” Calum shot her a devilish look before releasing her wrists and pushing her skirt up her hips. Continuing to pump his fingers inside her Calum's lips found her clit wrapping around it and sucking gently.“Fuck Calum” Camille tried and failed to be quiet.Calum had her on the tip of his tongue and between the way she tasted and the sounds she was making he could feel his dick getting hard again. He was relentless his mouth and his fingers driving her to orgasm as she quivered against his face her fingers desperately tangled in his dark curls. Camille felt herself shatter against him. Her legs quaking and turning to jelly she thought she might collapse.

Instead she found herself wrapped in Calum's strong arms as he picked her up and carried her over to sit on the edge of the sink. He held her face in his hands. “You're sure you want this” Calum asked.

Camille smiled blissfully never taking her eyes from his she took his hand and raised it to her mouth. She kissed the palm of his hand lightly which brought a soft smile to Calum's now swollen lips. Then while maintaining eye contact placed his fingers that had been inside her to lips and began to suck her own juices off of them. “Oh fuck me” Calum swore reaching for his wallet as Camille giggled.

“You won't be laughing in a second darling” Calum muttered putting on the condom. His mouth met hers again as he found her entrance wet and waiting for him. Snapping his hips he buried himself fully inside her making her hiss and throw her head back.

“Does that hurt” he asked.

“Yes but don't you dare stop” Camille panted in his ear.

Calum tried to set an easy pace as he took his time enjoying the feel of her around him.Camille squirmed impatiently making him grin.Until she clenched around him and grabbed the back of his neck.

“Fuck me hard Calum. Do it.” She whispered before kissing under his jaw right on the sensitive spot she'd found. Raking her teeth along it she knew she was leaving marks. Calum responded immediately. He leaned her back partly against the mirror. Grabbing her hip with one hand and her throat with the other he set a punishing rhythm. Camille couldn't help but squeeze around him every time he'd slam into her g spot causing them both to moan. Camille reached one hand down between her legs to rub circles on her clit the other caressing her own breasts. He'd never seen anything hotter. Calum could feel his orgasm building as he fucked Camille into oblivion.

“Are you close” he asked her.Camille just whimpered and nodded sending Calum into a frenzy.He watched her climax hit her. Her eyes screwed shut and his name tumbled from her lips again and again. Right as she hit her high her hips began to buck. Wrapping her legs tightly around his waist and he could feel her tremble around him. “Oh God what the fuck” it was too much and Calum's orgasm hit him harder and sooner than he expected. “Camille” he cried out her name as both a curse and a prayer.

Next Chapter All On My Mind

@biba3434 @vfdsstuff @babygirlcashton @toofadedtofight

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memoirs-to-myself · 5 years

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The World Can Be Tricked Re;DUX

This has been one lackluster journal, blog, whatever, hasn’t it? What started as a simple way to cowardly way to vent, went to daily reports, occasional pics and posts, and long absences due to actual journaling in late 2014-early 2015 (which are sadly lost, more on that later), then lack of interest, computer availability, and last but not least, tumblr taking the crapper (yes 2011 me, I know, insane right?)

What was my point, again? I had a point writing this, right? Oh yes, the memoirs, right.

I’ve always been, well, kind of different. I experience the world in a different sense than most people. If you’re reading this, chances are you already know that. One of the ways I like to view the world, ever since I was a little kid, was like a book series. Sometimes video game series, or a long movie series, but book series seemed to appeal to me more. Probably because of the length. I would always wonder to myself as a kid,” Is this my backstory? How many books am I already in? Has my story begun?” The thought has never really left me. “If my life were a book series, where would the first book start” Kind of a hard philosophical question of you think about it. Well, I think I have an answer, or at least one to give a purpose to this blog and possibly give it a future.

Let’s say my story started the moment I created this “secret blog”. I know, I know, there are plenty of important defining moments before I created this blog, and for all intents and purposes, those can all be my prequels. But the actual start of my mind library, or memoirs-to-myself (get the blog name? My mind’s been secretly planning this for years) is February 2, 2012. Excellent, now we have a starting point for my first book. And it just so happens be the starting point of this blog, oh my goodness, how convenient.

You might be asking yourself, “Hey Zach, How does this book series metaphor even work?” and I say, excellent question, trusted friend and/or future Zach! (Thanks for playing along buddy) I think of the “series” as my entire life, from start to finish, the “books” are the major stages of my life, possibly as childhood, adulthood, and retirement for example, “chapters” to being long stretches of time, “pages” being big moments on a smaller scale. That’s normally how I structure my life as I think back on it. I know, I’m a weird one, right?

But why start the books here, almost 17 years into my life already? Well, this is around the time I believe I started thinking for myself and becoming my own person. The start of who I am today, so to speak. However, I know I’ll want to chronicle the 16 years prior, and for that, I’ll probably view that as my prequel or backstory, if you will, so it stills stays within my book series motif. That story is for another time though, because I need to get to my point and I’ve already spent 45 MINUTES (oh my god) writing this part up and I don’t think i’m even close to done.

God have mercy.

The point being is that I believe the first book of my life is over. And if this blog is all a representation of that, then it is a poor one. I would like to fill in some gaps, clarify a few moments and memories that need proper spotlight. After all, I didn’t know I was in some of the best times of my life. And some of my worst. How could I? I want to use this blog as a library of sorts for my memories for as long as I can, and to do that, I need to redo the chronicling of my first book “The World Can Be Tricked”. Hence the ReDUX in the name of the title. This post will be a timeline of sorts of the important events that happened in that book. Everything before this post was written from me from the perspective of that book. This a retelling of the events after time has past. I plan to do these for all my “books” as a therapeutic way to reminisce and grow.

So without further ado, Let’s ReDUX:

2012- Wow. What a year. ZachZachMoore at his finest. I actually take back what I said earlier, this is a great place to start my story. The year I turned 17, the height of my high school career, the year I thought I fell in love. Already best friends with Jeffrey, Bloo at the time. Thats when I met Alex, Duff, Satiel, and even Kieth. Being a teenager was wild. Back then, I was still heavily involved with my youth group, wanted to be a youth pastor, was Prof. Plum in Clue, star performer in show choir, and was section leader when our marching band did Mechanize, the most successful show DCHS ever put on. It’s the year I became a senior, which is eventful on it’s own. Minecraft came out, friends had cars. It’s also the year where I didn’t get a lead in my last musical but all my theater friends did, the year I got my heart broken, and the year I started smoking pot. A year of beginnings alright and the peak of my teenage years. I had no idea where my rollercaster life was going, but I knew I was on top of the peak. You can say I was not ready for the first loop

2013- The first month of 2013 of was pretty normal. I was transiting from PC gaming from my ancient XP (rip sims 3) to modern (ish) console gaming due to my new XBox 360 and 3DS. My terrible school future had a light at the end of the tunnel, with moving going to the DEC, giving me a easy way to catch up on credits and not having to be at school all day. Things were looking good for me. Then Mom and I lost our home. Due to new management, and my mom having a terrible payment plan with the old management, we were evicted on the spot, had 24 hours to move. It was traumatic to say the least. I had lived there for over 7 years, it was the closest thing I had to a childhood home, that and my grandparents house. And in a night, it was gone. I didn’t even get to truly say goodbye. After that, Mom and I moved in with Grandma Judy, and Aunt Tami. It was not ideal. I kind of just shut down the rest of the school year after that. I barely talked to my family, started partying when I could, slacked off on my studies, lost faith in my religion (found Danganronpa and Nico B, but didn’t fully engage in them. Yet) . And then I was 18, laying in a dorm bed at Olivet Nazarene University for Celebrate Life 2013. I was laying there, thinking about my future. If things went as I had planned up to this point, then by this time next year, I would be laying here. but as a student, in the next stage of my life. It didn’t feel right. I didn’t feel right. Then I had graduated. I still missing some credits but I essentially scammed my way through and got a diploma anyway. That marks the start of the summer of 2013, my post graduate summer. Yes, I got fucked up. That was also the start of the Dope Fam, a collection of friends we had in school and just people that were in our class. They taught us to smoke cigs, party hard, and “trip” on triple C’s. Bad influences to be sure but hey. So were we. Then, on July 19th, I had on of the worst experinces of my life. I refer to it as the incident, and I plan on giving it a whole post in itself at some point. For now, now it was a “bad trip” of sorts, and it truly terrified me to the core. This whole first book is about me transitioning for a child to an adult, but this moment truly gave me a head start. It is definitely the start of my depression, even if I didn’t know it at the time. Moving on, this cycle of partying and staying at Papaws continued all throughout the year, I even practically moved in during the fall. But by the end of the year, I was back at my Grandmas, with my mom

2014- Once again, the start of the year was pretty much the same as last year. There wasn’t a real change til around April, when I officially moved into Papaw’s camper with Jeffrey, and started working with him in Landscaping. That lasted until it didn’t. We had sorta moved out of Papaw’s at that point, and were staying at a value hotel, when we weren’t partying at D-Mo’s, but without jobs, we couldn’t afford to stay there anymore. We stayed at Alex’s a bit, starting the three of us calling each goons (showed us death note, started my love on anime), re found Danganronpa and binged it to it’s sequel, securing my taste in Japanese storytelling, bought my iphone 5s, my first phone I 100% bought for myself, and moved into Jennifer’s garage in Ingalls in the middle of the summer, in the middle of nowhere, to the point where I didn’t get service for my new phone. At this point, Alex got us a Job working at the Marriott. Satiel worked there also. Around September, my depression was in full swing and I was convinced I was going to die at 19 because I was going to kill myself (Only thing that stopped myself was that I haven’t played KH3). Dark times indeed. Jeffrey wasn’t faring too hot either, with every girl under the sun taking advantage of him. He even got a cat, Jamenson. We needed a change or we were going to suffocate. So we did. On the final days of November, Jeffrey and I moved into our first apartment together, off of Ditch Road, at the Northwest Retreat, bare bones and broke as fuck, referred to now as “THE apartment”. We viewed it at the start of a new chapter. We had no idea how right we were

2015 Part 1: Part 1? As if this wasn’t long enough?!?! I’m sorry, but there’s such a drastic shift in my life in the middle of 2015 that I have to split it up. It’s also a good place to visualize the middle of my first book, so that’s a plus. Anyway, sometime in January, Eric started working at the Marriott. We befriended him immediately (Do you smoke? Smoke What?) and invited him over to the apartment. We quickly learned that his best friend named Richie lived in the same apartment and also invited him over. This is the start of the Goon Squad, a pre-evolution of the family I have now. For the majority of the first half of the year, Alex, Eric, Rico, Satiel, Jeffrey, and I spent our days chilling and smoking, not giving a damn about anything. This is when we decided we all true friends for each other. But working at the Marriott was brutal, non rewarding, and ridiculous and after 8 months, I caved and quit, promising a new job. After awhile, everyone quit, Alex moved in for a month, and we partied even harder. But we dropped all responsibilities, started acting like kids again. At this point in my depression, I was convinced I was trash and didn’t have a personal reason to exist in this world, except for KH3, which wasn’t much. So I just ran with my life at that moment, living for the Goon Squad. It was enough for me so I didn’t think of the Consequences. And so, in July, we were evicted from THE apartment. Jeffrey moved back to his mom’s. And I, along with Jamenson, who I essentially adopted at that point, moved back to mine, who had gotten a small one bedroom apartment, and had poor communication with me, which was all my fault, due to me being upset that all of my childhood belongings were lost, which was also my fault really. It was not a good time. Then it was June.

2015 Part 2: My mom asks me to get a job. I pretend to try and don’t. I couldn’t bring myself to do anything, for anyone. I felt abandoned by the very people I started to live for, though I now imagined they felt the same way. My relationship with my mom had changed drastically with me being 19, and I hadn’t felt fully comfortable with that change, let alone living with alcoholism again. I couldn’t enjoy any of my interests anymore, and I had no reason to move forward, even to help my mom, which I knew was selfish and I punished myself for it, causing an endless cycle of self hate. My depression was in full swing again. My friends weren’t faring better. Eric and Rico could barely show up to all our gatherings when we could have them, so they felt as if they were being forgotten. Satiel thought we were all moving on, Alex felt like a cheafur, I felt abandoned, and Jeffrey felt so thrown away, he dated the worst girl alive. ugh. Then Jeffrey got sick. Very sick. It was very possible he could die. It brought us to our senses that we were being petty and needed to come together. It was frightening and eye opening. When Jeffrey woke up, we all promised again to always be there for each other. I felt like things were looking up. The next night, I watched my grandma die. Yeah. The next night. My family was a mess of emotions. I could barely feel a thing. As I've stated, I sort just shut down when I can’t process things. That wasn’t an option this time, as I had my mother to think about. So I only turned off part of myself, except I don’t know if I ever turned it back on again. I’ve never enjoyed celebrating my birthday after that, since they’re so close. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten over it. I don’t know if I ever will. My mom got some money back and wanted to do something great with it, so at least something positive can come out of this dark time. So, she fulfilled my long time childhood dream of owning a laptop. With that, I was back into the PC world. To be strong for my mom, I knew I had to sort something out with myself. so I found new interests, mainly Danganronpa and Nico B, learning that I can be passionate about something nerdy and not be alone, raising my spirits greatly. At this point, Jeffrey broke it off with {nameredacted} and moved in with me and my mom, and we all started moving forward again.

2016 - Oh boy. I knew 2016 was one of the books when I was living it but hot damn, this might be the best year of my life so far. So many good memories, friend building, family making, litest time ever. It’s the year Jeffrey met Krista, Rico met Rachael, Alex found Nico, Duff officially joined the group, Keith came back for a bit, Taylor showed up in our lives, I turned 21, and so, so, many snapchats. Raccoon Lake, Duff’s garage, Rico’s parents house, Alex’s car in my parking lot. We all hung out as much as we could. 2015 is when we became friends, a squad. 2016 is when we became family. So many memories that I could go on and on and on. Zero Time Dilemma came out that year. Nico played Kingdom Hearts and fell in love. I found Steins;Gate, arguably the greatest story ever written. 2016 wasn’t without it’s bad though. I still couldn’t keep a job, and I wasn’t doing my mom any favors by letting her take care of me. 2016 was the year I “dated” Cheyenne and stopped looking for something romantic, feeling that it wasn’t for me. I was so caught up in trying to like my life again, I didn’t realize the sacrifices people were making for me to even get the time to think about it. Alas, I was blissfully ignorant, living in the glow of 21-ness. The year passed with no real page turners. Just good memories.

2017- Kingdom Hearts 2.8 is coming out, the final piece of the puzzle before Kingdom Hearts 3. I need a PS4 to play both, so I guilt trip my drunk mom to buy me one, even though she definitely couldn’t afford it. At this point, I was still feeling like my mom still owned me something due to her alcoholism in my life, without realizing that even if that was true, she had paid that due and i was practically stealing from her at this point. Not gonna lie, I was kind of a shit this year. I just couldn’t see it at the time. With my PS4, I could play with mostly all the Goons, starting the co-oping time of my gaming life, directly leading me to Paragon, starting my competitive part of my gaming life, which I was sorely behind on. I was working warehouse to warehouse to appease my mom but not staying long enough to actually help her at all. Triple C’s weren’t cutting it anymore so Rico and I tried Acid, and Jeffrey and Krista tried Molly and we shared our results with the class. We finally found our party drug, and I finally got some closure on the incident. Jeffrey and Krista moved in together, after he proposed to her, and we made it our new trip central. I started streaming my gameplay and actually giving serious thought towards a future career in gaming. Then, in October, my mom and I got into a fight. A really bad one. I named it “The fight that ended” and I’ll probably explain that name and the event in detail in a later post. For now, It was a fight that made us realize that we couldn’t live together anymore. “We weren’t good for each other” she said. So she threw me out. Jeffrey and Krista took a shattered me back to their place. They said I could stay there but their lease was up in a month so we would all have to make quick plans. I knew at this point that I had changed into something I didn’t want to be, someone that hurt the ones he loved. That had to change. And now was a good as time as ever. So, the Goons made plans to move in together. And by plans, I mean threw all their chips in the pot and hoped for a flush. I got seriously employed, sold my laptop so I could have move in money, hardened myself for the journey. I was still shook from the fight with my mom but I had to grow so I stopped feeling and just moved. Through some divine power, we got our wish, and on November 22, Duff, Alex, Rico, Jeffrey, Krista, and I moved into the “Goon Pent”, a penthouse apartment in Castleton. A dream we all shared since THE apartment, had finally been realized. We were at an all time high, we were adults and we were making it work, together. After a rocky end, we were looking towards the future with hopeful eyes.

2018 - For the first 3 months of our lease, everything was cream and peaches. We all had jobs we were serious about, we were drinking or tripping every weekend in our own place, we kept the place clean and every one was one their own shit, Alex started dating Shelby, we even re branded the Goon Squad, to Goon Tang Clan, adding more members and friends we made along the years. Then I had an observed pee test which I couldn’t do, quit my job as a result, and wound up in the same place mentally as I was 3 months prior. I realized I hadn’t changed at all and in a cycle of self hate, I started doing the same thing I was doing at my mom’s: nothing. Duff fell into the same strut, Rico had an unreliable job, Krista and Jeffrey couldn’t find a job they could tolerate so they sold pot to make up the difference, which was also unreliable, making Alex having to cover the differences all the time. Things were starting crack, figuratively and literally, as we learned out penthouse wasn’t so luxurious as it was made out to be. We learned that while we were all great friends, we weren’t the greatest roommates to each other. We distracted ourselves with a month long stream, Taylor moving in, Paragon’s death, but by May, we were starting to get shitty with each. Me really getting shitty with me, cause at this point I had pawned all my stuff, and owned all my friends money. I had nothing to show for it and it was my birthday soon? No. I’ve had enough of doing nothing to just do something for a little while to make me feel better to just quit. I wanted to be someone my friends could depend on, after all the time I had depended on them. I didn’t need to be some superstar person to be of use to them. Even if I was a shitty person, I could still do this. I realized this world can be tricked, that I could have issues and still make it through life. And so, for the first time in a long time, and truly did something. On the eve of my 23rd birthday, I got employed and worked all summer. I cleaned up the house without compliant. I helped others with bills and help found jobs for others. I paid back all my debts and got my PS4 back, albeit with no games, forcing me to truly build a gaming library all by myself with no ties to my mother, I was never late or missed a day at work during that time, using my self hatred as fuel to work hard. In the summer of 2018, I finally changed for the better. Then we got some huge news: Rico was going to be a dad. So Rico moved out (though he’s over allllll the time), Shelby moved in, and we all agreed to one more year here, making the end of the lease in December 2019. In September, we were doing we but I was starting to get tired of cleaning all the time. My self hatred could only take me so far and it had died down quite a bit over the summer. It’s hard to be depressed when you’re always busy and actually tired. Though Kingdom Hearts 3 delay to January didn’t help any. The house was being divided though, with me on all sides. It was going to blow to a head soon so I tried to mitigate everything I could. From Duff’s Alcoholism, to Krista’s friends being over ( Newdell is the only important one to note), To Eric just being over, we were complaining about everything. It was at this point that I fully realized that our dream of living together, had an expiration date. This great moment of my life was starting to end. On Christmas that year, I was left wondering where would that leave me? I wasn’t afraid of the Squad breaking up, but if we all moved forward right now, what would I do? Could I exist on my own? And then it was

2019- I stare at my TV screen, the timer on it draining ever so slowly. Less than 5 minutes were on it but it might as well been years. Funny, considering how long I’ve been waiting for this moment, how long could 5 more minutes be. Very long in fact. Long enough to rethink your whole life to moment. It was 11:56 PM on January 28th, 2019. 4 minutes til Kingdom Hearts 3 was out. I had called off for this. I didn’t know it at the time but I was going to be temporarily fired for this. My friends were sitting in my room with me. They weren’t caught up on Kingdom Hearts but they were to watch me react. I’ve been waiting for this game for over a decade. I stayed alive for this game. I existed these past 7 years for this one wish, to play this game. In 3 minutes, that dream will come true. And I was terrified. For some reasons, understandable. Will I enjoy playing it, Will my favorite characters survive, Will it live up to all it’s hype. All rational fears to be sure. But one was screaming louder than the others. What now? All my life, I hadn’t have many personal goals for myself, choosing to live for others rather than myself. But with everyone slowly moving on without me, I have to learn to have hopes for myself. However, the few childhood dreams I had, I had already achieved. I found a family where I could be myself. I got my laptop, found nerdy games, moved in with the goons. The only one left was about to be delivered in 2 minutes to my PS4. “Are you excited?” someone says. “Yeah, I’m speechless” I stammered out, not quite a lie but no where near the whole truth. Am I excited? It’s the end of an era. End being the key word. I realized that I can no longer call myself a child anymore. I was an adult. What does that mean? A minute left of this time, this moment. How do I feel? What do I do now? Can I live on with everyone on my own strength. Am I strong enough? It was then I noticed my phone was buzzing. An alarm was going off. It was for the release of Kingdom Hearts 3. It was out. Before I could even blink, the moment was gone. I existed post Kingdom Hearts 3 world now. A world I never thought of living in. The song I chose for the alarm was reaching it’s chorus. I had a choice here, a choice that’s been present this entire first book. To finally move forward and change, or return to endless cycle that will doom me. It’s never been much of a choice. Either I stay in this moment pretending it’s perfect or I live to beat of the song thats been playing. To face your fears. I turn off the alarm and turn towards my PS4, with KH3 waiting to be played. A choice to make here. “Well are you going to press play?”

Not much of a choice at all

I faced my fears and pressed play

Ending “The World Can Tricked”

A book on how I learned to face my fears: myself

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