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skyburger · 2 months

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lately ive been going through my google history when im bored (which is so incredibly entertaining btw. highly recommend) and apparently, after double-checking my camera roll that date & finding proof to support this theory, i did indeed first watch hlvrai on november 4th of 2020. absolutely insane. i thought i hadnt seen it until mid-2021 at LEAST.

shoutsout to my friends who i watched it with at the time half of which i dont talk to anymore... i owe u for getting me into funny half-life series. thank you oomf

WARNING !!! below the read more is a long fucking list of funny* things i found in my camera roll from the week i first watched hlvrai. like not the images themselves just me talking about them. i dont know why i thought that was a good idea but alas i already spent 90+ minutes writing that all out and tbf i did have a good laugh looking at that shit. anyway the warning is because its long as fuck and i'm willing to bet not at all interesting to anyone who isn't me. i think if i talk any more i will ramble for fucking ever so ill shut up. WARNING OVER !!! miami make some fucking NOISE. dj tsumugi.

*please note these were funny to both me in late 2020 (age 15) and me now (older but not at all wiser). what im trying to say is read at your own risk because 90% of this is unfunny as fuck but it could be worse. it could be shit from when i was 12. That would be really bad i think

anyway here are some highlights from my camera roll from like the day before, the day of & the day after "the incident" (me watching hlvrai):

a ridiculous amount of terezi pyrope pictures. i had not (and still have not) ever read homestuck

at least 30 pictures of hugh o'conner. probably more if im being honest with myself

the same few pictures of kokichi ouma? for some reason?

like a lot of pictures of nagito komaeda. there is at least one screenshot where my discord pfp is nagito. Something Happened

vriska and nepeta also make an appearance. the former more so but not nearly as much as terezi for some reason

a lot of screenshots of discord convos involving various hughdebeste aus. some favorites are the homestuck au, the peabody & sherman au(???), the meet the robinsons au(??????), splatoon au

blu and red scout tf2 they have taco bell and kfc shirts respectively?

professor sycamore from pokemon and professor sycamore from layton. there are multiple images of each and theyre right next to each other

screenshots of the homestuck wiki. Concerning

a screenshot of an email i got from nintendo about the special edition fortnite switch releasing

like a lot of screenshots of alfendi layton from when i was playing lbmr. not surprising but theres kind of a ridiculous amount

a picture of alvin (the chipmunk) that just says "WE DID IT"

screenshots of me talking in ridiculous 13375P34K on twitter and being accused of kinning from homestuck. quite frankly? i deserved that

hatsune miku makes a few appearances

many tumblr post screenshots. However i did not take these myself i just saved them from reddit. really ashamed to admit i did this for literal years even when i used tumblr at the same time

picture of professor layton standing in that one pose in that one picture i dont know how to describe it. the "you know i had to do it to em" one

that one bugs bunny suit meme and it says "i wish all boobed men a very pleasant evening". this was apparently important enough for me to save twice like an hour and a half apart

many screenshots of me on discord AND twitter posting quotes from hlvrai as i watched it. this includes on my masked disciple roleplay account

a picture of my danganronpa trilogy for ps4 copy. but its one of those live pictures so when i click on it i get attacked (i had the flash on because i took this picture in the dark)

that one really terrible picture of tommy coolatta thats like the first non-fanart picture of him on google images. thrilled to announce i think thats been the only image on his wiki page for years now

picture of hime & mikoto meika's mmd models. i think they had recently released or been announced at this point

catboy apollo justice & wolf boy klavier gavin gacha life gifs. i think my friend made this (if it was in fact my friend and not someone random this was the same friend who streamed hlvrai and thus changed my life forever btw)

that old meme about not passing [xyz] the aux because theyll play [abc]. it says "Do NOT pass the kinnie the aux / They'll just playin 'Alvvays - Archie, Marry Me (Official Video)'"

screenshots of calendar events i set up celebrating the anniversary of two dgs characters' deaths (genklimt fans rise up!)

screenshot of my real kinlist on my real carrd from 2020. i can tell it was just edited because this screenshot has scribbles on it (i circled the latest addition to my kinlist which is in fact "dr. coomer")

screenshots of me and my oomfs on this one specific anime rp roblox game that i WISH i could remember the name of. it let you import pngs of any character you wanted so we had pictures of ace attorney guys hanging out with madoka girls at some point. this specific instance includes klavier gavin, baby trucy wright, rosie from animal crossing & a blue orb thing(??). we are all incredibly small for some reason

john cena suit gangnam style depression. this is saved multiple times. does anyone else remember this post i used to be obsessed with it for some reason

picture of a historical moment in my life (the day i changed my ps4 username to "TheKokichiOuma" which i have regretted for years now. in my defense it did actually use to be worse than that im so serious. 2018 was a dark time why did i pick the name "DabWeebPolics". Horrific!

screenshot of a string of tweets between me and a friend at the time. the tweets arent actually important except for the first one which reads "these gummy bears taste british i cant explain it". this is only important because i remember these fucking gummy bears and they DID taste british in like the same way heathrow airport feels british you know

this one picture of my chemical romance in a forest(?) but bob looks like my fucking dad at a quick glance and it scares me every time i see it. i saved this multiple times over the course of that day

various pictures my friend made of jove justice being set on fire

the really short businessman with the fuckass bob from the lorax but my oomf edited him to look like kazuma asougi

picture of byakuya togami which is only funny because it has text on top of him that says "I. DO. NOT. GEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

a single screenshot of a tumblr post about the events of That Day (destiel putin election day.) the only other thing referencing this in my gallery is a screenshot of the trending tab on twitter (the trends are, in order. 1. #TrumpMeltdown 2. destiel 3. #ElectionResults2020)

two paper mario character pngs followed by that one misha collins picture. you know the one

various screenshots of a mishapocalypse happening on twitter

more super paper mario pngs

im going through pictures slightly further out from nov 4th now (i think after i look at nov 2nd & nov 6th ill call it quits). first image i see is that "gay people i respect vs. gay people i dont respect" image and i dont know why i saved that nevermind i scrolled and immediately found i made a dgs meme out of that

phoenix wright BASED ON GAY MANGA?

went through the ace attorney mamboleo person's deviantart that day i think so i have various funny works of theirs saved. i think the average person actually would know them as the stamp on the ground animation person so. Thats them too. on a side note watching that video after you got into metal gear is fucking insane

that mom against cat boys tshirt

a lot of unnoteworthy professor layton & ace attorney & dgs images

ben shapiro on the ace attorney witness stand?

oh im finding out i got really fucking mad at william petenshy that day. iirc i got so fucking annoyed at this case i didnt even finish it i just. skipped it. i wasnt even playing it i was just watching it???

one of those "tag yourself / which mutual am i" posts but all the options are characters from my kinlist. one of the titles is a jfk clone high reference

screenshots of dms to klimt van zieks begging him to drop a kinlist

a screenshot of a friends reply to my tweet (hi doop) which did just remind me of my "damon gant is apollo justice's grandpa" theory. this tweet manages to tie yanni yogi into the family tree

screenshot of a discord music bot playing a youtube video (remember when they could do that?). the video is titled "henry ledore does his taxes for 10 minutes asmr"

apparently i looked at characters i share a mbti with that day. highlights include souseki (the dgs guy. no idea about the real one), ron delite, flora reinhold, pyro tf2, agent 8 (splatoon), n harmonia & my goat DERPY HOOVES

screenshot of part of twitter's trending page. it says that trending in the united kingdom, with at least 3,610 tweets, is "Homosexuals"

screenshots of multiple tweets in a row from me. they all involve me frantically talking about how i really want to kin nagito komaeda even though i know fuck-all about him

various pictures of markiplier (both in real life & in fma)

real screenshot of me unironically saying "mental illness innit" in reference to myself. this was in my twitter dms with my friends klimt van zieks roleplay account which is even worse

original gina lestrade & egg benedict image made by me. if you know the apollo gant image its basically that

okay i lied i went back to nov 1st and i think i'll check nov 7th afterwards. one full week of nonsense. this proved to be a good idea because i immediately found a screenshot of a text to my mom asking her if she kinned gnomeo from gnomeo and juliet. she said yes

possible origin of why i own a boss baby poster: oomf kin-assigned me the boss baby

possibly my favorite example of the twitter feature where it shows you the original tweet and then the last two replies on a long thread of replies to that post. the original tweet is me saying in all caps "i care him so much he is so small" about luke triton (what a 2020 sentence!). the last two replies are from me and then my oomf but i think only the first of the two needs recounting. it says "do you really want to explain vore to your teachers". i know i say i want context a lot but i genuinely do really want context for this what the fuck happened here

oh good! boss baby update: theres a screenshot of my ebay purchase of "BOSS BABY Poster A5"

im on pictures from november 7th now. i think i went through a figures bot that day because i have a frankly ridiculous amount of figures (mostly nendoroids. mostly miku nendoroids.) there's also the default hime & mikoto png in the middle of these

twitter notification screenshot. apparently kristoph gavin ace attorney followed me that day

i think i went and looked through a christian memes subreddit or twitter account or SOMETHING i dont know where else these all came from. this is followed by a staggering amount of facebook minion memes

side note: does anyone else remember the aatwt (ace attorney twitter) & puyo puyo twitter crossover event in the michael's customer service chat incident? that feels like a different universe

this one is really nothing compared to any of this other stuff but i do have proof of me saying "pog" unironically

grand finale to this saga is actually from a couple days after (nov 9th 2020) but after seeing the staggering amount of death the kid images i had saved over like two days (i had watched a couple episodes of soul eater with my pals) i felt compelled to dig up my "death the kid get wifi anywhere you go" fancam. i might post it later cause its a classic (only to me)

thank you all so much for watching remember to like and subscribe and whatever. thank you for reading this if you read it for some fucking reason. i spent just over an hour and a half looking through this shit & typing this but it was a nice walk thru memory lane tbh! im gonna shut up now before i start rambling. feel free 2 ask for the images or context to any of these i literally love rambling. peace and love on planet earth. LOVE YOU ALL!!! GOODNIGHT NEW YORK CITY

#muffin mumbles #and in cass anyone wanted something to do. feel free to give me a date from any time after like christmas 2013 #and i will dig up an old search or video i watched or email or image from my history #its so entertaining to me. DONT FEEL PRESSURED TO THOUGH!!! the option is there if u want it but it is NOT mandatory #so again i say... goodnight new york city. (i take a bow and walk off stage)

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itsthegamemaster · 1 year

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PROLOGUE

The windy day at San Diego didn't stop the plans of Vice Admiral Cyclone; he still wanted to go around and see every single plane they had prepared for the practices and, later on, for the actual mission. Rear Admiral Warlock was fighting against the wind that insisted on blowing the other direction, which made him held the papers more firmly, making sure none would fly away. He read the crucial points about each of them. Every single person being handpicked to be trained to a special mission, a mission that even the best of the best could fail. Warlock squeezed his eyes, cursing the weather at the same time, as he read the initials AM. You could think it was about morning time, but as he opened the file to see the full name you could swear he saw a problem. A person in the form of problem.

— Another Mitchel? — the Rear Admiral asked as his eyes thrilled the whole paper on his hand as fast as possible, trying to maintain it. — You think he's like his father? — the Vice Admiral asked, not as bored as expected, looking to the big gate that locked one of the F/A-18s. — She. — I'm sorry? — he seemed confused with the sudden correction. — She, it's a girl. He had a daughter — now both of them were staring at the ridiculously big gate. — And considering her files, I have no doubt she's like the father.

•••••

A/N: I'm reposting this fanficon.

This was my first time posting a fanfiction (in english) which will, probably, flop. But anyways, I hope you enjoy this. Sorry for any mistakes and bad grammar, first of all I'm not fluent; and second: don't know anything about Navy, everything I got here came from the movie or Google.

*I highly recommend you to read this while listening to some Top Gun playlist — by fans or original soundtrack.*

#top gun maverick #rooster bradshaw imagine #bradley rooster bradshaw #top gun #phoenix #payback #hangman #bob #coyote #maverick #top gun fanfiction

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fantasiallamarcia · 3 months

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tagged by @whamss and didn't see it until just now, sorry bud.

Last song: i've had land of eikons on loop periodically throughout the past week and today's one of those days. fucking love ff16. can they please put the rest of the soundtrack on spotify so i can add it to my ff songs that fuck playlist. i also have wanderlust on more often than not lately bc ff15. yeah. you feel me. also yoko shimomura is just that bitch of video game soundtracks imo.

Favourite colour: pastel blue or that specific shade of glowing purple they always use for nightmare/orpheus in idv.

Last movie/show: watched treasure planet with my sisters a week-ish ago and surprisingly liked it? wish they hadn't made jim into a disney prince at the end. killed the vibe for me. show was the confession killer on netflix, mom and i have been getting into watching weird true crime documentaries ever since we watched love has won (highly recommend, though be warned bc they won't tell you this but there are graphic depictions of a corpse and it does get very, very disturbing so be advised if you can't handle that kind of thing)

Sweet/spicy/savoury: spicy. i'm a spicy guy. i love spicy. i put jalapeños on my italian hoagies from wawa just to feel something.

Relationship status: single and not even entertaining anything remotely romantic. happy valentine's day.

Last thing I googled: not sure if i can legally say what i searched but let's just say i was looking for a ridiculous valentine's day read and i found it :)

Current obsession: literally every square enix game i've been able to get my grubby little hands on. kingdom hearts is still at the top of the list but ff16 is a close second, that i hope to be tied with ff15 the further me and my sisters get into it. the world ends with you fucks too i just need to sit down and play more. shout out to square enix for excelling at toxic yaoi, though. nobody's doing it like them.

don't have anyone specific to tag so if anyone sees this and wants to do it, be my guest

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crookedfandomquill · 7 months

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Hi hello it’s me, your local writer who cannot hack writing except in the dumbest and most humiliating ways imaginable. Let me explain:

I write in Comic Sans. Yes, I know it has great utility for dyslexic folks. No, I personally don’t have beef with it as a font. But the fact that I can only churn out words in a font my brain perceives as unserious is… fucking ridiculous. It also gets me weird looks when writing in public. 2/10, would recommend.

I draft dialogue first. I literally write chapters twice as fast if I first isolate all the dialogue points and write only the characters speaking, then go back and fill in the prose. No, I don’t know why it works, but it does, and it fills me with bafflement and rage. 1/10, would rec to the momentum-losing girlies.

I write much faster if I’m procrastinating on something else. Yes, this is just ADHD. Yes, I write at work to put off doing expense reports. No, I am not proud of it. 3/10, would only recommend to highly skilled procrastinators with some flavor of mental illness.

I have to print out my chapters right after I finish them to escape the quicksand of “oh I’ll just edit a couple things real quick…” WRONG you will spend a week polishing it and by the end you will hate the story and yourself. If I print it, I’ve crossed the Rubicon of inadequacy and cast the die of regret. However rough that chapter is, it’s out of the Google doc and in the world and now I have to fucking live with it. 5/10 this one is actually really chill and I encourage any writer to try it.

Point being: write in whatever stupid, weird, embarrassing ways help you put words on paper. Your dignity is nothing compared to the creative imperative.

#writing #fanfic #oc stuff #novel writing #writing tips #look it’s all just confetti make your own rules #be the ringleader of your own damn circus

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nightinghoul · 10 months

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Talkin' About Poop

(CN: Hashimoto's disease, chronic dehydration, mental health, suicidal ideation and yes, poop. Mostly poop.)

Why have I decided to talk about poop today? I think it's something we need to destigmatize, so that people can ask for help, and spread knowledge for the benefit of others.

As a bit of an aside, I always find it funny when the young'ns make fun of Activia commercials. You don't think you'll be talking about your poop with your middle-aged friends/family some day? HAHAHA! Almost everyone in my life has some sort of borderline traumatizing poop issue.

Here's mine: People with Hashimotos are chronically dehydrated, which causes chronic constipation. (I feel I like I should address that really severe constipation can lead to a medical emergency, but I'm not talking about that today.) Constipation can be ridiculously uncomfortable and often pretty damn painful, but here's something else I learned recently: It can cause anxiety!

I found an article from Pubmed Central (through the US National Library of Medicine) stating, "...the prevalence of mood and anxiety disorders in constipated patients is much higher than general population..." I looked that up on a hunch. The hunch was that last night, after a week of taking mega doses of laxatives with no results, I started spiraling into anxiety and depression, thinking everyone hated me, and experiencing passive suicidal ideation. Then I pooped.

I didn't have any idea the two were related, but being physically comfortable without respite for a while can certainly have a negative impact on your mental health. And then there's this:

"...A person's stomach or intestinal distress can be the cause or the product of anxiety, stress, or depression." (Harvard Medical Publishing) So yeah, it's kind of a which-came-first situation. Anxiety certainly doesn't make it any better for me.

I was so unfamiliar with being healthy when I was younger, I didn't even talk to doctors about my gastric issues for years. I only talked to them about my most outwardly noticable symptoms, which at the time was that I was having migraine related seizures that I couldn't hide. It didn't even occur to me that ALL systems need to be working for the body to function properly. We have this basic understanding with vehicles, but we don't do this for ourselves. We wait until we're falling apart, when we know we've had a pain, something feeling off, or, ya know, weird poop for a month.

A lot of us in the US feel trapped because there's just not an emphasis on healthcare in our society. Sometimes, our only option is to crowdsource for health solutions. I think that sucks, but if that's what you're doing right now, here's *my advice for healthy poops:

1. Eat your ruffage (leafy greens, lettuce, cabbage, kale, brussel sprouts, etc.)

2. Look for fiber content in food or suppliments. Here's a guide to healthy amounts of fiber. (It's the first one that popped up when I googled it.)

3. For the love of God, drink lots of water. Myself, I drink a minimum of 64oz of water a day, in addition to any fluids I may get through foods. But really, I drink way more than that.

4. Consider the possibility that certain foods may be related to your discomfort. You might try eliminating certain foods for a couple of weeks to see how it makes you feel.

5. De-stress - whatever that means to you. Your mental state can absolutely affect your gut.

*I am not a medical professional! I just have gut issues. If you can talk to a doctor, I highly recommend that. Never withhold important health information from your doctor, even if it's a bit embarrassing!

Get your poops healthy!

#health post #health issues #mental health #it's poop ya'll #gut health #Hashimoto's

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crazywolf828 · 2 years

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What would be your ideal pokemon team?

Okay so here's the problem, I usually just use whichever I think look coolest/are my favorite and over level them until they can beat anything. There is zero room for strategy in this house.

That being said, cyndaquil (who's my favorite also evolving into hisuian typhlosion), Arcanine, Jolteon, gangar, mudkip, and probs Lucario.

Essentially get a really good rock type and you can take out half my team

#i just woke up and remember like three pokemon so like #this is subject to change #but cyndaquil is my all time fave #and i really like hisuian typhlosion in comparison to normal #ive also always loved mudkip because its (mostly) based on a mudskipper #which are lil dudes i was obsessed with as a kid and they cat live in water and on land and its this whole thing #they look ridiculous highly recommend googling them #i really am a fan of fire types tho #hm #im a basic bitch #don't mind me #answered #ask #anon

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goodbye-yashiro · 3 years

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My brain so much isn't working that I had to use Google Translate to read the dam' text out loud. And while I'm at it! (I was writing a post for a week, but it's too long, I couldn't ever finish it :P) It's a quick, messy post because I have to study. EDIT: It took me two afternoons to finish.

ADHD study tips!

- BeLineReader is some super useful, it colors text gradient, has an open dyslexic font, and clean/reader mode! (Tho it "expires" after a few weeks, and you have to delete and download it again.)

- Grammarly is good, but it sure can get annoying with it telling you you misplaced a comma, but refusing to tell where.

- Rereading the notes you took in class is always better than nothing. Pro tip: reread them before going to bed, and right before class, because our brains process information at night.

- When you have to do an essay/PPT, Ctrl+F is your friend. Also, write down questions or keywords you want it to be about. Write a "first draft," a little messy, that only you (but you do) understand, and only when done start to reword it with "fancier words."

Include the terms you've learned in class. Teachers like to hear themselves back.

- If fancy words, I have two sites for you: scribens.com (a grammar checker), rhymezone.com (it has everything word-related you could ever need).

- Highly recommend Weava Highlighter too! You can highlight and save text from any site or PDF and even add notes.

- When doing a PPT use the automatic design ideas and pictures, pictures, pictures - it's easy and will look a lot better.

- Copy-past sentences from your sources and reword them, change the word order on the slide, use the original sentence when presenting.

- Use Comic Sans for writing notes/essays, but if not comic sans, some neat font. Copy-past a text from Tumblr into a document and you'll get the font Tumblr uses. (Which is apparently too long for me to include)

I like Courier New too.

- Have a paper for "junk thoughts" - write them down, but only deal with them later.

- Look for the fun things. Documentaries, history movies, colorized historical recordings exist.

-Tie it up with interests! You like making neat Tumblr posts? Great! Make neat Tumblr posts! IV. Henrick Moodboard. Make memes about it.

Explain it to someone in the most basic "meme language." "And then he goes..." "*something*" "Pathetic" "XY left the chat."

How fun is that??! (especially for literature and history)

- The effort rule (based on some experiment) the more effort you put into it, the more likely you will remember it. Sounds ridiculous, but...

put down your notebook in one corner of the room so you have to walk a little with every sentence, and take notes this way.

- Another ridiculous way to remember stuff is to place the information in unique places, so you will remember it for sure. Write that formula on an empty toilet paper roll no one had the energy to throw in the trash. Put a sticky note on the cheese in the fridge.

- I'm the kind of person who gets motivation from not doing the notes for myself but to make videos on the topic for the "next generations," because our school system su©ks.

- Have a document/bookmark folder with all the stuff you'll need!!!(links I mean) And go by the path of the links.

Like this:

X'o clock - Y'o clock - History, ancient Greece

[link of source for studying] [link of source for studying] [link of source for studying]

Y'o clock - Z'o clock - Rest

[link of a Tumblr blog you want to check out for new posts] [link of a short video you want to watch]

Make starting only take one/two clicks. Use a site blocker and only whitelist the few pages you'll need for 1) studying, and 2) in the breaks.

- This thing can automatically open a new tab (a link) at a given time.

- For note-taking in class: use an erasable pen.

- In the classes where the teacher simply can't explain, only jot down the keywords and look them up later. Check your book for illustrations and definitions. Works for just-pass-will-forget-everything-after-the-test subjects.

- Illustrate your notes. I like to doodle little figures in my notebook, it 1) keeps my hands busy

2) as I'm a visual type, it helps me remember where was a piece of information in my notes located, and

3) it forms a link in between dry and heavy information. (It personalizes things [countries, groups, ideologies], visualizes concepts, and brings color into events)

This is what my notes look like: (for strucutre - tho I love philosophy, so with my not-favorite subjects it's obviously a bit different...)

- As for sensory things:

☀️ Let there be light! Sunlight or some lamps with a cozy mood.

💻 "Play" with the settings of your screen, turn down the brightness, the saturation, etc.

👕 If you find it refreshing, maybe take a bath/shower before, or change your clothes to more comfortable ones.

🍃 Let in some fresh air, make sure the room isn't too hot, nor too cold.

🍹 Have a bottle of water by your side, so you don't forget to drink.

🎧 If you need some background noise, there are tons of ambient sound channels on youtube and there's also MyNoiseNet.

🎼 Or put on a music/playlist with only a few tracks looped. Or instrumental music. Or music in a foreign language. Just imagine learning history while some cinematic classical music plays. XD

If you feel bad, here's this site that might help you figure out why.

I plan to make other ADHD and autism posts soon. Till then, *casually salutes* I hope I helped some! :)

#adhd #actuallyadhd #school #advice #resources #reference #autism #actuallyautistic #study tips #online school #long post

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mctreeleth · 4 years

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Here it is! The instructions to make a pieced and quilted plague doctor mask!

Just as a heads up, this pattern is not really recommended for beginners. There is not a whole lot of explanation of the basic techniques, and it requires a fair bit of precision, two types of fusible interfacing, and an assumption that you can keep a consistent seam allowance and do some hand sewing and know when to sew things right sides together and such.

I am not promising anything, different methods will yield different results, I have never made a pattern exactly as it was written and neither should you. If you want something the same as the next person, go to the shops.

Actually, nevermind, this is a quarantine craft, stay home.

There are two ways to do the piecing for this project. The first is a quilting technique called English Paper Piecing, there are plenty of tutorials online, but it is done by hand and I do not have the patience for it. Still, if you have the time but not the machinery, it is probably your best option for a very good finish. Cut the pattern net out of card, glue the bits onto your fabric, sew them up, pull them out and add interfacing after. I sewed three hexies together once and got bored and gave up.

The method I actually used involves my favourite cheat for sewing: you can use an inkjet printer to print on non-woven fusible interfacing! There are ridiculously overpriced pre-cut packs available, but also you can just cut up some midweight to the right size. I just have a boring old Epson printer, and I can get away with just putting some scotch tape along the edge that feeds in for a bit of stability. Alternatively, depending on the brand, you can “fuse” it onto some non-stick baking paper, cut it to size, and then peel it off without losing too much adhesive. (My pictures look a little different because my original A4 version fits on the page differently than the shared version)

Printing onto interfacing means I know my dimensions are perfect, and I have the markings on the pieces so I know what joins to what. If you only have a laser printer, or your inkjet hates you and wont let you print on interfacing, I still recommend using fusible interfacing for structure and precision piecing. You will just need to keep a lot better track of what is what, because the pieces are all slightly different and they only go together one way.

The actual “pattern” for this project is a geometric net. I highly recommend making one in paper or cardstock first, because we all have different sized heads. As with most quilting projects, it will generally get to be a little bit smaller again once it is all sewn together, so keep that in mind.

This is a link to the PDF on Google Drive. It is a 4 page document, for printing on US letter size. There is enough space around the pieces that it can also print onto A4 paper: the one inch square should measure 2.5cm. Similarly, the extra space means it can be scaled up a bit before any gets cut off, if you have a particularly large face.

(Edited to add: if you were going to make this in a single fabric rather than pieced together patchwork pieces, I have uploaded a simplified version of the pattern, which has more curved seams which are easier to match. The technique is otherwise the same, but note that these patterns do not have seam allowances - you will need to add them when you cut your fabric so that the pieces match.)

The body of the mask is made up of two mirrored (four total) pieced together bits, plus some circles to go around the lenses. There are two mirrored top pieces, and two mirrored bottom pieces. The top pieces are numbered 1-14, and are split over two pages and need to be joined together. The bottom pieces are lettered A-H. On one side of the pattern the numbers and letters are circled, so you know which side you are working on. There are also small dashes in the corners of the pieces; single dashes connect to single dashes, double dashes connect to double dashes. At the parts that become the edges of the eye holes, there are little dots at the end of the dashes.

Even if you are printing onto interfacing, you will also need to do a paper printout, as it will be used later as a pattern to cut the batting and the lining. The paper printout can also be used to work out your fabric placement, if you are going for a certain look (again, this one was printed as an all in one A4 sheet, but it works the same).

Cutting the Patchworked Outer

If you have managed to print onto fusible interfacing, all you need to do is cut the pieces. Otherwise, do what you need to trace the pieces onto interfacing, making notes of where they go and which sides align to what.

Once you have your interfacing pieces cut and organized, fuse them to your fabrics with at least enough room between and around them for seam allowances on each side.

I use a 1cm seam allowance, but feel free to use a quarter or half inch if that is what you are used to.

Trim all the pieces to have a consistent seam allowance.

Lay the trimmed pieces out on the paper printouts. This will let you know if there are any pieces missing, or any parts where fabric duplicates might share a seam.

Piecing the Patchworked Outer

First, piece together the nets of the bottom pieces. Put a straight pin straight through at the corners of the interfacings of two neighboring pieces, so they are perfectly aligned. Then angle the pin on the right hand side so it comes back up along where the seam will go, and angle the one on the left so that it is going across.

Sew along the edge of the interfacing, aiming for just alongside of it, not on it.

Finger press the seams open, then repeat until all the pieces are together.

The technique for the top pieces is the same, but at any join which ends at an eyehole (marked on the pattern with a black dot on the ends of the dash), backstitch at the end of the interfacing, so that it won’t pull apart at the edge. The seam allowance at this part will be cut off, so it needs to be secured before that point to prevent it from pulling apart.

Batting and Quilting

Properly press all the pieces, with the seams open.

Using the paper pattern, cut out two mirrored top and bottom pieces from fusible batting.

Iron these onto the inside of the pieced parts, so that their edges line up with the interfacings. In my experience, the best way to iron on fusible batting is from the right side, so I pin them in place and flip them over, iron a little bit so they barely stick, pull out the pins, and fuse properly.

Do some quilting. I just went 5mm to the side of every seam, because the next lot of seams need to be topstitched in the same way, and I like the consistency.

Assembly of the Patchworked Outer

Join together the gap in the top pieces. The batting was aligned to the interfacing, so the technique is the same.

Press the seams apart and topstitch the seams to either side.

Trim off the excess seam allowance around the eye holes to the edge of the batting and interfacing. this was why we needed to backstitch earlier.

The next step joins the top and bottom pieces together. The bottom piece attaches to the more curved edge of the top piece - that last seam that was joined after adding the batting will meet these side seams, angled towards the tip of the beak. Sewing the sides is the trickiest bit to do on the machine, so, while I would normally say basting is for cowards, if you want the points to match perfectly, this is a time when pinning will not really cut it. I just hand sew through each point where the seams join, go back through a couple of threads over, and tie it off.

Then I put pins through the longer seams.

When sewing it with the machine, try to keep the lines as straight as possible, making turns only at the seams where you put a basting stitch.

Once both sides are sewn, press the seams open and topstitch to either side.

Repeat this step for the top centre seam. You can just pin baste this one if you would rather, because the angles match, but it is literally right there in the middle where everyone can see it, so if you are not confident in matching points, baste it.

Press the seams open and topstitch.

The technique is the same for the bottom centre seam, but topstitching all the way to the tip of the beak is not possible, so you will have to do the last bit of top stitching by hand.

It doesn’t matter so much if it is a bit messy, because it is not in a place where it can really be seen, but spitting the seam will help it hold its shape more nicely.

That is the pretty outside bit done.

Making and Attaching the Lining

To make the lining, use the paper pattern to cut two mirrored pieces of the top and bottom pieces, with whatever seam allowance you prefer.

The gap on the top piece will have a maximum possible seam allowance of about a quarter inch, but this is enough for a secure internal seam. The eye holes do not need a seam allowance.

Sew together the gaps in the top pieces, then sew the top seam of the top pieces and the centre seam of the bottom pieces together.

Open up both pieces and sew the sides together. You should have a lining piece that is a floppy, boring version of the outside piece.

I have not included a step for how to make a strap, because everyone has their own preferred methods, and there are plenty of alternative options. If you don’t want to worry about making strapping you can use ribbon or elastic, or put a small loop there to thread something through afterwards. Whatever the choice, pin to the centre of the back edges of pattern pieces #10, facing towards the eye holes.

Put the lining piece, facing right side in, over the pieced outer and the strap pieces and pin around the edges, lining up the four seams of the lining with the seams on the outer.

Sew around the edge.

Turn the piece right side out through one of the lining’s eye holes. You just sort of pull the pieced outer (which is currently inside) back a bit, until the tip of the beak can come through an eye hole, and then try to pull it through as gently as possible so that the raw edge of the eye hole doesn’t get too stretched and frayed.

Then push the lining back into the pieced outer body of the mask.

Pin around the edge, so that the lining is all tucked neatly inside.

Top stitch over the edge.

Eye hole time!

Pin the outer and lining together in the eye holes, and top stitch about 4mm (1/6th of an inch) from the edges. Trim any fraying bits.

Hand stitch 1 inch wide bias binding to the inner edge of the eye hole, just over the top stitch.

Flip the bias binding through the eye hole to the outer, fold the raw edge of the bias binding under itself, and hand stitch it down to the outside. Repeat for the other eye.

This next step is the worst bit, and if you have another method, go for it. Theoretically you could use something thicker that wouldn’t fray, like a felt or leather, so that you didn’t have to worry about lining the eye holes, but it depends on the look you are going for.

Cut out four circles from fabric, two of the biggest size, two of the medium size. Draw the smallest size circle in the middle of the back of the medium sized circle, and stack it on top of the centre of the big one, right sides together. From the fusible batting, cut two donut shapes of the medium size with the smallest circle cut out of the centre.

Using very small stitches, sew around the small circle drawn on the medium sized circles. Fuse the donut of batting to the back of the large circle, with the inside of the donut matching the sewn line. Cut an even smaller hole out of the middle, so that the seam allowance that remains is a slightly smaller width than the batting. Clip this into at least 12 pieces.

Press the smaller circle towards the centre, so that it can be turned in though the hole.

This will take a lot of careful ironing and pinning. Let it sit for a bit, so that it learns to be there.

Then unpin it, but hopefully the little clipped bits will stay there. Fold the bigger circle down over them – you will need a lot of little tiny pleats – making the outer edge as round as possible.

Then press that smaller circle back down over the pleats, so that it is level with the folded outer edge. If it sticks over in any places, trim it back, but only just.

Pin this donut shape over the eye piece. The inside edge of the donut should be level with the inside of the bias binding, the raw edge up against the outer fabric.

Hand sew around the outer edge of the donut to the pieced fabric. Make sure that the raw edge from the smaller circle is under the donut, but do not let it flip out through the middle. On the machine, top stitch about a quarter inch from the outer edge.

This should catch the raw edge inside, and leave a ridge between the outer eye donut and the bias bound eye hole. From the inside, it should be possible to pop in a round lens from a pair of sunglasses, or an improvised lens such as a circle of clear plastic cut from the lid of an old takeaway container, or some transparent holographic vinyl, such as this stuff on amazon. Repeat for the other eye hole.

Hooray! You are all done!

I am really not sure on the efficacy of this as an actual viable mask. On the one hand, there are a lot of seams through which germs could pass, but on the other hand, the fact that the lining is a bit loose and baggy inside the beak might cancel that out.

Depending on your materials, it should be machine washable, although it will almost certainly look a lot less crisp.

I had a lot of issues with my lenses fogging up after a couple of minutes of me wearing it, but who knows, maybe I am just a very wet breather.

I am not going to charge anything for this pattern, nor am I going to place restrictions on what you do with the items you make. I do not control your right to profit from your work. All art is derivative, and you making your own version transforms this pattern. Don’t let assertions of intellectual property rights be another way you are alienated from your labour. If you decide to sell your work, demand fair remuneration for your time and skills. Someone offering to pay for the materials is not enough. If you have decided to take an activity you love and turn it into work, make it worthwhile.

On the flip side, please don’t try to sell this bit of writing or the PDF of the pattern net or these photographs. They are free for you and for everyone else. Resist society’s message that you should try to profit from your every action, and especially resist the notion that true success is achieved by profiting from anyone else’s labour.

If you want to discuss this stuff further, I would love that! I am researching the commodification of creative knowledge for my PhD, focusing on quilt patterns and designs. Message me @mctreeleth on tumblr and instagram or @sarasewsstuff on twitter for my uni email.

Edit: I have added in a link to a simplified version if you are going to make this with a single fabric rather than patchwork piecing.

#plague doctor mask #quilting #sewing #quarantine craft #sewing pattern #craft pattern #long post under the cut #with so so many pictures #it has been a wild five days #I haven't slept in about 37 hours #I have three of these but only one set of lenses #that just fog up instantly

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starryeyedrogue · 2 years

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studying resources masterlist

hey all! since I’ve seen several posts lately of people looking for useful sites for studying/homework, I figured I’d make a masterlist of what I use most! hope this is helpful! tagging @my-darling-haldir - too much info to send over messenger lol. the links in bold require accounts to use, but everything here is free to use!

BACKGROUND NOISE

lifeat.io - I use this one all the time. there are tons of backgrounds to choose from (fandoms included!!) that come with white noise specific to the background you chose. no ads, either! it’s best to make an account, but you don’t have to! it’s completely free either way:)

asoftmurmur- this one is also useful for helping you sleep! you customize nature sounds (i.e. rain, wind, waves, etc) to the volume/frequency you like best (you can save multiple and even make a playlist!) that play on a loop until you close the tab!

noisli - I haven’t used this one, but I’ve heard it’s good! you choose from different kinds of white noise, can make playlists, and choose different modes (sleep, sound blocker, nature, white noise, etc). you can also send a timer that reminds you to take breaks!

CUSTOM STUDYING TOOLS

quizlet - full disclosure, I probably wouldn’t have passed half of my classes without quizlet. you can make flashcards, practice tests, games (based on your terms), spell mode, write mode, and more! you put in your terms and definitions, and the site will automatically add them to whichever mode you want to use! I highly recommend checking out the settings for the different modes, too - you can customize just about everything!

youtube - sounds basic, but I got through dozens of math assignments by using youtube tutorials. ya girl’s embarrassingly bad at math, and looking up the specifics of the assignment in YouTube will give tons of tutorials. never underestimate what you can find there!

google - another extremely basic one, but here’s the trick: copy/pasting the question into the search bar. trust me on this one, you’ll find the answer in no time! especially useful for those “filler” assignments that you just don’t have time for answering normally. if you don’t want to cheat, just search tutorials or look up resources:)

chegg - it’s mainly a book-rental site (see textbooks below), but you can also get help with homework! it proofreads, provides tests (both for practice and answers), professors to help you, and 24-hour help!

citationmachine - I dispise writing citations, but using this site seriously helps! you can choose from different styles (APA, MLA, etc) and sources (online, articles, books, religious text, magazines, etc). just select the style and source and copy/paste the link, and fill out the form (this part is optional!), then it gives you your citation, easy as that! the site is pretty slow sometimes but is super helpful! it’s part of chegg’s resources and also provides proof-reading for those who need it:) (there are ads but it’s only once a day for the most part)

old notes!! - this isn’t a link, but if you take notes from old courses, keep them. trust me. more often than not, you’ll run into the same concepts again later, and you’ll thank yourself for keeping them. just keep them organized and in a specific spot! if you have siblings that have taken the same class, take advantage of their notes too!

ONLINE STUDY GROUPS

studystream - specific to classes/study (I think)! study online with other students from around the world!

studytogether - there are options for discord-only, zoom, “focus groups,” and more!

disclaimer: I’ve never used these, but from what I hear they’re great and very useful! remember, be safe and don’t disclose personal info:)

TEXTBOOKS

chegg* - this is insanely useful for college students. seriously, don’t skip this one if you’re a college student/about to enroll. we all know textbooks are ridiculously expensive if you buy them from the university bookstore, and amazon isn’t always useful either. type in the version, title, author(s), and year of the book you need, and chegg will have it for much cheaper. my last textbook was around $500 in-store, but on chegg it was around $50! the prices vary of course, but it’s still way better than buying a book you’ll never need again! you can order the books you need, get an electronic copy (use through the app) for 30 days, and send the book back once the course is over! it’s basically a library for college textbooks!

A/N: I’ll probably add onto this more later, but this is what I could think of at the moment! I hope this helps!!

* = requires payment and account to use (only for purchasing textbooks, not for using the other resources)

#i might do one for my writing resources too #i need a masterlist of all my masterlists lol #roguespeaks #school resources

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ineffable-snowman · 3 years

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(apologies in advance to the people who followed me for Good Omens. I’m diving headfirst into a new fandom, so I’m afraid there’s going to be a lot of Sambucky in the next three weeks at least...)

I wrote a fic inspired by episode 3 of FATWS. Read it here or on AO3.

Trouble Man

“It is a masterpiece, James. Complete, comprehensive. It captures the African-American experience.”

What kind of passive-aggressive bullshit was that? It was annoying enough that Zemo insisted on calling him ‘James’ in that patronising way of his but now he tried to lecture him or rather tried to make him look stupid, uncultured and ignorant. Bucky wanted to laugh at Zemo’s comment that sounded more like he was quoting a Wikipedia article to appear sophisticated, but then Sam spoke up.

“He is out of line – but he is right.”

Fuck Zemo. Seriously, Bucky had enough reason to hate Zemo but this was on another level. This was personal. He made Bucky look stupid, uncultured and ignorant in front of Sam. And the thing was, he was mostly ignorant about Marvin Gaye. He had listened to some of the tracks from Trouble Man just because they were on Steve’s list, and had quickly decided that it was not his kind of music. Now he wished he had at least listened to the whole album so he could contribute more than a weak “I like Marvin Gaye”, which fooled absolutely no one. He had no idea how a simple conversation about music had escalated like this. It had seemed like perfectly normal banter, Sam making fun of him for being old-fashioned, and then Zemo had interfered with that comment and it was downhill from there.

For some reason Sam was very passionate about Marvin Gaye and Bucky was intent on finding out why. Also, he needed to find out how music could be “complete, comprehensive” and “capture the African-American experience.” In his experience, music was used for dancing and for fun and that’s all there was to it. He stared at the notebook. There was some really good advice in it, like Thai food or Star Wars. So far, Bucky had not seen the appeal of Marvin Gaye. But apparently Steve had. If Steve had adored the music so much, why had he just simply crossed it out in a neat line and not, for example, put an exclamation mark behind it? Bucky added two exclamation marks.

Right, how to do this? Not for the first time he regretted just getting a simple flip phone instead of one of those fancy smartphones. When the shop assistant had told him that he needed a phone for taking photos and listening to music, Bucky had almost laughed at him. Talking about stupid… He could really use Youtube or Google now.

“Do you have a computer with internet?” he asked Sharon.

She looked at him like he was stupid (it was becoming a theme) but showed him to a computer and even gave him earphones. Then he started to listen to Trouble Man and this time did not skip any tracks but listened to the whole songs. He also googled the lyrics but that did not leave him any the wiser. Doctor Raynor would probably tell him to use his goddamn mouth and just ask someone, for heaven’s sake. He would rather get frozen again than ask Zemo. But it also felt extremely wrong that Zemo, who was supposed to be one of the bad guys, seemed to know and understand Sam better than Bucky, who was supposed to be Sam’s…whatever. Were they friends? Bucky certainly considered Sam a friend (although he never would say it out oud), probably the only friend he had left. Someone who texted you and asked you how you were and invited you to lunch was a friend, right? Someone who even saved your ass and (repeatedly) broke the law for you was a very good friend. But did Sam consider someone his friend who did not text back, who repeatedly got him into trouble, kept things from him and had even tried to kill him? Bucky stared at the screen. It was a miracle Sam had not tried to kill him yet. It was even more of a miracle that he was still being nice (sometimes). He googled “Trouble Man” and “African-American experience”. To his disappointment, it was not a quote from a Wikipedia article. So Zemo knew what was going on and Bucky did not. He turned up the volume and tried to make sense of the lyrics (“Got me singin' – yeah, yeah – Hoo“).

“Finally doing some catching up on the good stuff?”

Bucky turned around so quickly that the earphones were ripped out of his ears. Sam had put up his hands in defence and was babbling something about attacking or not attacking or whatever.

“Jesus.” Bucky consciously unclenched his left fist. “Couldn’t you just knock?”

“I did. You didn’t answer.” Sam pointed at the screen where the Youtube video of Trouble Man was still running. “I knew it,” he said gleefully. “You have no idea who Marvin Gaye is.”

“I do!” Bucky protested but then trailed off because he may have heard some of Gaye’s songs but he still did not know who Marvin Gaye was.

“So.” Sam crossed his arms over his chest. “What do you think? Honestly.”

Bucky looked from Sam to the screen to the dangling earphones. I like it was not an appropriate answer. Not an honest one. “I don’t get it,” he finally said.

“No appreciation for good music.” Sam sighed dramatically. “Hopeless. Stuck in the 40s forever.”

Bucky could have left it at that. They were on common ground again, bickering but not hurting each other, it felt familiar, safe. “No,” he said nevertheless. “I – how? How is this music – how does it…capture the African-American experience? Most of the songs don’t even have lyrics.”

“You don’t need lyrics for music to be meaningful.”

“How? Is it because people listen to it in certain situations or…?”

“Alright. Ready for a lesson on 20th century music? You better take notes.”

Bucky opened the notebook and took a pen. Then he noticed Sam’s grin. Right, he hadn’t meant it literally. But now Bucky had already opened the notebook and he was determined to go through with it. So he wrote down all the names Sam dropped, the musical genres and important songs. It was a lot and, as a lot of things, it confused Bucky but he just rolled with it. So some bands destroyed instruments on stage and certain music apparently had a soul? Great. Speaking of souls, this was probably the right time for some soul-gazing to show Sam that he was actively listening. (Doctor Raynor would be so proud of him.) Sam kept bringing up the soul thing several more times until finally Bucky could not keep quiet any longer.

“What’s with this soul music? Is it, like…music for funerals?”

Sam stared at him. Bucky stared back.

“Okay, scoot over.” Sam squeezed on the chair next to Bucky so Bucky almost fell over on the other side. Then he reached over Bucky to grab the mouse, opened another tab and chose a Youtube video for Bucky to listen to. “This is soul music.”

It was highly uncomfortable because the chair was not made for two people and they both weren’t exactly small but Bucky was resolved to stay on the chair, at least with one thigh. Sam chose video after video, pointed out characteristic musical features, quoted parts of the lyrics and talked about the history or the significance the songs. It was still a lot and Bucky still did not get everything but he dutifully took notes to look up some things in detail later. When he had filled the sixth page in his notebook, Sam stopped the music lesson.

“So, 40s music. Any recommendations?”

Bucky turned to face him. They were awfully close. Sam’s eyes were somehow very soft, there was the hint of a smile on his lips and he looked very huggable in that thin turtleneck – and he looked genuinely interested in Bucky’s answer. Bucky felt hot shame flooding him. Sam could be aggravating and an outright asshole but he was too kind for this world. Too kind to Bucky.

“Nah,” he mumbled. “Music in the 40s was just for dancing, for fun. Not…not important like your music.”

“Oh, you can dance just fine to my music,” Sam said in mock outrage. “Come on.” He elbowed Bucky out of the chair and chose another Youtube video, then stood up, too.

“Soul music?” Bucky guessed when the first chords of an electric guitar could be heard.

“Funk. Close enough.”

Sam started to move to the music. It should be ridiculous, the weird moves he was doing, because that certainly wasn’t proper dancing, not the dancing Bucky knew anyway – no rehearsed dancing steps, more like a spontaneous swaying to the music and some of the moves were definitely ridiculous but Sam made them look, well, smooth.

“See, that’s dance music, too,” Sam said and came to stand in front of Bucky.

Bucky had no idea why it was even called dancing but he wasn’t going to say that because he did not want to offend Sam again.

But of course Sam had to nag him. “Spit it out.”

“What?”

“I can see the cyborg gears turning. What’s wrong with dancing?”

“Nothing. Just not what I’m used to.”

“You can choose the next song. For now – get those hips moving.” He nudged Bucky, and how could Bucky say no? After Sam had spent all that time educating him and only mildly making fun of him for his ignorance, he owed it to him.

“This is ridiculous, I feel ridiculous,” Bucky complained when he tried to copy some of Sam’s moves.

“You’re doing great,” Sam said but he was grinning, clearly enjoying how Bucky was making a fool of himself. “Maybe tone down the staring a bit.”

Well, if it made Sam happy… Bucky decided to give it his all and moved wildly to the rhythm, not caring if it could be called “dancing” or not. Nonetheless, he was a little relieved when the song was over.

“Your turn.” Sam indicated the computer.

Bucky had no idea which song to pick. He tentatively typed “Billie Holiday” into the search bar.

“Seriously?” Sam came up behind him. “You know Billie Holiday and say you don’t understand how music can capture the African-American experience?”

It was like a punch in the face. A well-deserved punch probably. “I mostly saw her as the singer of love songs, for slow dancing,” he admitted. “Never really…thought much about it.”

“So what, you’re going to slow dance with me, Barnes?” It wasn’t the usual good-natured banter but sounded more like an accusation.

“Look, Sam, I…” Bucky rubbed his temples. “Let’s head downstairs to that party to…” hopefully not dance. Whatever. Get out of this situation where, he feared, he was breaking rule #2 again.

“No, let’s do this.” Sam clicked on the first link and a swing tune started to play, Me, Myself and I. “Let’s slow dance if that’s what you do.”

“Really?”

“Absolutely.”

It was certainly the most aggressive ask for a dance he had ever received. And he had never been this stiff during a dance before. He used to be a good dancer back in the days but now he felt clumsy when he placed his hand on Sam’s back while trying to keep as much distance between them as possible.

They had not even made eight uncoordinated steps when Sam started to speak. “Would it hurt you to use that brain of yours once in a while? It’s supposed to be working properly again, isn’t it? That’s what I heard at least.”

Doctor Raynor’s words came back to him, that he was free. To do what? Certainly to do better than hurt the man who had always had his back without Bucky ever having done anything to deserve that kind of loyalty.

“I’m sorry,” he said, unconsciously tightening his grip on Sam’s back.

“What for?”

Everything. “For being…kind of… thoughtless, I guess.”

Being so close, he could actually feel Sam exhale. “That’s the understatement of the century.”

“For being a huge dick,” Bucky offered.

“Better,” Sam grumbled. “Now, was that so hard?”

Bucky took a step back to gauge Sam’s reaction. He was relieved to find no traces of hurt or betrayal in Sam’s eyes, just the usual exasperation he put on when looking at Bucky. “Yes. Physically painful,” he tentatively tested the water. It was like a dance, back and forth, seeing how far you could get.

Sam rolled his eyes. “I hate you. And please stop staring.”

Bucky shrugged and pulled Sam close again, in fact, so close that he did not have to look into Sam’s eyes anymore but was now staring at his left shoulder. Sam was visibly relaxing in Bucky’s arms and wasn’t that a miracle, that he was still in Bucky’s arms, still allowed Bucky to hold him?

“Thank you,” Bucky mumbled into Sam’s shoulder.

“What for?”

Everything. Bucky tightened his hold on Sam (and silently thanked the autoplay function that started the next song because he was in no way ready to let go of Sam yet). “I’m a mess and you don’t deserve all that shit I throw at you.”

“Mm. You’re welcome.” Sam squeezed his shoulder, like a reassurance that he would continue to put up with all of Bucky’s bullshit. Too damn kind for this world. Good thing he had Bucky on his side who was going to beat up everyone who so much as tried to exploit Sam’s kindness. (Yes, he knew he was being hypocritical and should technically start with beating up himself.)

“Sharon was wrong,” Bucky said. “I’m not obsessed with the whole stars and stripes stuff. I didn’t follow Steve because he had that shield. And I’m – well, you might’ve noticed I’m here and not following that – that asshole. Sam, I think you should take the shield but, with or without the shield, I’ll follow you. Just so you know.”

Sam was silent for quite some time, they were just swaying gently to the music, until Bucky heard close to his ear, “That a threat, Buck?” He could almost sense the smile against his cheek.

“Just a fact. And I hate you too, by the way.”

#non good omens #sambucky #my writing #fanfic

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sadpotatoondrugs · 4 years

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Time For a Change [Ch.1]

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Many would scoff at the idea of Marinette Dupain-Cheng waking up on time, early even, and making it to school before anybody else. They would laugh, dismissing it with a quick “Yeah, right.”

Marinette herself was surprised at first, but turns out when you don’t spend your days working on gifts and favors for your friends, you have a lot more time for yourself and to get a good night’s sleep. Finally being able to follow a proper schedule she mentally had and getting to bed at an appropriate time was a beautiful experience.

She finally understood what was always keeping her on her feet all the time. It wasn’t the fact that she was Ladybug. An akuma happened barely once or twice a week. It was the fact that she had always wanted to please her friends. She recalled how they often came to her asking for a small favor, that favor later developing into a full-day project. And of course, she has always wanted her friends to know she cared for them, so she put everything she had into the work for them, she put every bit of love into it, which led to her often being too caught up in her work to remember she had two homework assignments for the upcoming day, or that it was already 2 AM and she had to get up in five hours for school.

She never received payment, of course. They were her friends, after all!

Today, she would fix that mistake. For a few days back, Alya approached her for the first time in months with a smile.

“Hey, Marinette? Could you make a dozen of chocolate cupcakes and a dozen of vanilla cupcakes for me?”

Marinette wanted so badly to scoff at Alya that day. Of course the girl would harass her every day, but once she needed something, she would come to Marinette acting like they were buddies again.

“Sure”

She didn’t half-ass them, no, she couldn’t. As much as she would’ve liked to put flour, eggs, sugar and many more ingredients into a box and hand it over, labelling them as Do-It-Yourself Cupcakes, she couldn’t bring herself to do it. So, she did the next thing that came to mind.

Instead of making complicated cupcakes, decorating them with care and styling them according to her classmates prefferables and likes, she did basic Vanilla and Chocolate cupcakes with appropriate frosting her bakery normally served, not even bothering to put sprinkles. In fact, all the sprinkles and extra decorations she always made were an addition made by her. Now, she made the cupcakes how she would to any other customer; according to the bakery’s recipe.

She grabbed the box of cupcakes from the big refrigerator where they stored cakes and such. She kissed her parents’ cheeks as a goodbye and made her way to school. She waited for Alya to come into the class to hand her the boxes. She was the fourth person to enter and Marinette immediately made her way towards her, putting the boxes on the girl’s desk.

Seeing Alya’s face once she opened the boxes and saw the plain-looking cupcakes, Marinette did everything she could to not laugh in her face. The girl immediately started blowing a fuse, yelling at Marinette for making the wrong order. Said girl remained calm throughout the whole commotion.

“I didn’t compromise your order. In fact, this is the time I actually followed the proper template for making these cupcakes.” Alya rolled her eyes.

“Every time I wanted cupcakes before, they were always so pretty, I didn’t order this!”

“Yes, you did.”

“Oh my god, is this about Lila again? You purposefully wanted to ruin our picnic, didn’t you?”

Marinette blinked twice before answering.

“You never specified for what purpose I am making those cupcakes, therefore I couldn’t possibly ruin them out of some jealousy, as you claim.” Marinette’s corner of her lips twitched upwards for a second when Alya realized she just spilled the beans that the class was going to have a picnic without her.

That, or just because she realized Marinette was right.

She didn’t care which was the reason.

The class was half full by then, they all stared at the duo exchanging the goods that were meant for their little picnic. Noticing the state of the cupcakes and Alya’s expression, they came to her aid.

“That is so uncool, Marinette…”

“Yeah! Normally, these would be decorated like a pro! You didn’t even try!”

“This is low, Marinette. Even for you.”

The old Marinette would’ve flinched at their accusations, started defending herself while being at the brink of tears. The old Marinette would apologize immediately and promise them to bake another four dozens of cupcakes.

But not this Marinette.

This Marinette was done.

“As I said before, I was simply following the bakery’s basic instructions to Vanilla Cupcakes and Chocolate cupcakes. Google it.”

The looks on their faces were priceless. They didn’t have anything to say back, they were left speechless. The angry expressions on their faces didn’t disappear, though. And they had no idea what Marinette was going to do next. They weren’t prepared for what she was going to say next, and that fact made Marinette smirk mentally.

“Now, onto the most important part-” She turned back to Alya and handed her a small paper, “That will be 42 Euros, Alya.” The face Alya made- no, no, no, that wasn’t it. The faces everyone made was a priceless sight to see.

“WHAT?!” Alya yelled, taking the paper from her hands. It was actually a receipt, stating the bakery’s price for a dozen of standard-sized vanilla cupcakes with vanilla frosting and a dozen of standard-sized chocolate cupcakes with chocolate frosting. Printed boldly at the bottom of the paper, the price of 42.08 Euros. Alya looked up at Marinette with her eyes furrowed and Marinette could swear that she saw a vein about to pop on her forehead. “Are you kidding me?!”

“As I am not wearing a red nose and face paint, you can assume that I am serious.”

The class once again erupted in an uproar of insults aimed at Marinette’s pettiness. Comments about being jealous about them spending time with Lila rather that with Marinette, at which Marinette rolled her eyes. Did they not hear that she had no idea about their dumb picnic until today? They really were thick-skulled.

“You never charged for them before! Just because Lila is going to be there, you suddenly change your mind?! That is so spiteful!”

“In fact, I don’t care what you plan to do with those cupcakes, nor do I care who is it for.” She stared into the brunette’s eyes without any emotion, clearly meaning each and every word. Alya was taken aback by that. “I may have let you of free before, sure, but that was when I let you walk all over me. When I let you use me to get free stuff.” Marinette felt slight guilt saying that. Not because of Alya or the other classmates, but because she remembered once again how much money all those orders she did for free must have cost her parents. At least now she could do things the right way. Before Alya or anybody else had a chance to resume the game of Who Can Yell The Loudest, she grabbed her phone from her purse. “Now, I could listen to you having a childish rant about not wanting to pay for what you ordered, or I could easily just call the police and let them handle the situation. Or you could just pay like you should and end this whole ordeal.” She smiled at them. “I would highly recommend just paying me now, I really don’t want to bother the officers with something as ridiculous as this.”

The class was in utter silence, nobody could believe what they were hearing. Was Marinette really willing to call the police over something like so…small?

“This is ridiculous… You never charged before, you can’t charge me now!” Alya exclaimed, breaking the silence in the class. Marinette sighed, clearly disappointed by the chosen answer.

“Very well then, I didn’t really expect it to have to come to this. Oh well..” She proceeded to unlock her phone and go into dial. Alya’s eyes, as well as the eyes of everybody else, immediately widened.

“Wait! I’ll pay for the stupid cupcakes.” Smiling, she put her phone away.

“I’m glad we were able to settle this like adults, Miss Césaire.” Alya was dumbfounded. She couldn’t believe who Marinette turned out to be. She couldn’t believe how petty she was. She silently thanked Lila for revealing the horrible person Marinette really was.

After Alya handed Marinette the money, which she had to borrow from the other classmates, Marinette finally left to get to her seat. Profanities and glares were thrown her way, labelling her as the ultimate baddie. Marinette saw Adrien out of the corner of her eyes, looking at her disapprovingly, like she had disappointed him somehow. From that day on, the class will hopefully no longer ask for any favors.

If Marinette’s memories were labelled in colors like in the movie Inside Out, this memory would surely come out as a yellow one. She couldn’t help but laugh at her classmates’ denseness. Paying for the things you buy was a lesson every little kid knew. If there was one word she would call them that moment, it would be entitled.

The alarm rang, signalling the beginning of the first class. Marinette composed her thoughts and focused on the teacher as she explained the topic of the lesson.

Soon, it was lunchtime. Marinette had long stopped paying for the school lunch and instead went home every day to eat.

“Hello maman.” She kissed her mother’s cheek upon arrival. Setting her school bag aside, she went to her mom and helped her with cooking lunch.

She ate her lunch silently with her mom, her father being out delivering one of their orders.

“So, how was school, Sweetie?” Her mother suddenly spoke up, which startled Marinette a little bit. Her mother never asked about her school lately; Marinette told her it was pointless, seeing as it was pretty much the same everyday.

When she was expelled, her parents didn’t know what to think. They were confused when Marinette opened her locker and found the stolen amulet. They knew their daughter would never do anything like that, but then, what was going on?

Later that day, when they got back home, they sat Marinette down and asked for her side of the story. They reassured her that she can tell them anything that has been going on, that they know that she would never do any of those things. She told them everything that day, everything from when she came into the school until her expulsion. They hugged her and comforted her as she cried in their arms.

Ever since that day, they no longer believed the school higher-ups. Lila had the audacity to come into their bakery one day, full of tears, stating that Marinette had been bullying her because of her relationship with Adrien Agreste. They were both angry as soon as the teen opened her mouth, immediately understanding why Marinette had been so infuriated with the girl. Not wanting the girl to bring any trouble to their daughter, they acted like they couldn’t believe their ears and sent her home to ‘calm down’. They told Marinette about the encounter right after she left.

“Umm… Usual, I guess. I had a fight with Alya, actually.” At that, her mother raised an eyebrow. “Remember those cupcakes I made? Vanilla and Chocolate?” Her mother paused, recalling the previous day where Marinette baked two dozens of cupcakes.

“The ones you made yesterday? Yeah… Did she do something to them?” Marinette shook her head.

“She was the one who ordered them, actually. And you know how I made cupcakes in the past for them?” Her mother smiled sadly at the girl.

“How could I not, you spent almost three hours just making sure they were perfect and decorating them.”

“Well, they never asked that I make exactly what I did, I always did that to show them how much they mean to me.” Her mother reached out and stroked her daughter’s hand. “Alya just said she wanted Vanilla and Chocolate cupcakes, so I just made the them by the bakery’s template. She wasn’t so happy about that.”

“Was she expecting more...?”

“She started yelling at me. Saying that she ordered something else, that I messed up the order on purpose. I didn’t, of course.” Taking a bite out of her food, she brought her fork up and made a proud pose. “But being the responsible teen that I am, I handled the situation calmly and told her that it was exactly what she ordered.” Her mother chuckled at her daughter’s playful dramatization even though she was explaining an uncomfortable experience. “I didn’t want to continue the conversation longer and the class was starting soon so I had to move on to another part.” Sabine couldn’t help but notice a flash of guilt in Marinette’s eyes, which made her worried. “I… Am sorry that I never made them pay for their orders, maman.” Her mother grabbed her hand and squeezed it reassuringly.

“Don’t blame yourself, Marinette. You have a good heart. You just wanted to please your friends. It’s okay. We understand.” Marinette smiled gently at her mother and continued with her story. Sabine couldn’t help but notice a glint in Marinette’s eyes.

“Well, I fixed that mistake today.”

“You made Alya pay for it?”

“Yup. You should’ve seen their faces. They didn’t expect me to want money for it.” Marinette chuckled slightly. “Everybody immediately protested. Saying that I never charged them before. It seemed to me like they refused to back down until I said they didn’t have to pay.” Sabine looked shocked at that. She knew that her classmates’ view of her daughter changed with Lila’s lies but… They couldn’t possibly become this entitled. Her daughter didn’t deserve people like that in her life.

“And… Did she pay you in the end?”

“Well… I told her that she can either pay me or explain it to the police…” She scratched her neck when she said that. Sabine’s motherly instincts rang inside her head to assure her daughter in her decisions.

“You handled that well, Marinette. If somebody doesn’t want to pay for your services, calling the authorities is never not appropriate. That is important to know when you enter the world of business.” Marinette smiled at her mother gratefully, thanking her for her support. She knew she was talking about the future, that her mother believed she would someday have her own business in fashion.

“In the end, she paid me, so it’s all good.” She finished her story, just like she finished her food. The timing was perfect. She stood up to wash the dishes since her mother finished eating a while before her.

“Anything else happening at school recently?”

“Nothing I can think of.” Her mother nodded, though she couldn’t see that.

“Well then, It’s time to bring out the good news, I guess.” In curiosity, Marinette turned around with a mug in her hand, continuing to wash it carefully so she didn’t get any water on the ground. “We received a mail today. From École des Beaux-Arts.” Before she even finished the name, Marinette already dropped the mug, staring at her mother in shock.

“Does that mean…” Her beloved mother only smiled at her in response, walking around her and reaching for something in one of the drawers. She brought up an envelope, showing the stamp on it before proceeding to give it to her. Marinette took it with slightly trembling hands. This was, after all, a letter that would decide Marinette’s future from then on.

Ever since Marinette got falsely accused and expelled from her school, her parents had been searching for a school she could attend. Even after Marinette got back, her parents refused to let her stay in such corrupted school.

She slowly opened it, her mother waiting patiently for the girl to read the announcement.

Mademoiselle Marinette Dupain-Cheng,

The school has received Your letter regarding the possibility of your transfer.

I have to inform you that transferring to a school this late into the year often proves to be difficult, both academically, should the student be accepted and faced with the abrupt change in educational progress, and formally, for the requirements are much more strict due to the obvious lack of other students willing to apply at given time. If your decision remains the same after being aware of these conditions, the requirements for your transfer are given below:

An essay* reaching the minimum of 2500 words on why should we accept your transfer;

Portfolio showcasing some of your finest work – how much you choose to present is up to you, but the more material we have, the better.

Most importantly, sending the documentation from your previous school; Your school record, grades & competitions you were a part of, Attendance. These are the three pillars of importance you need to look out for to be accepted.

And at last, an interview; One of our school counselors will reach out to you shortly after we receive all of the above.

Should you be accepted, bear in mind that you will be required to take placement tests due to the difference in the academic pursue of your current school and École des Beaux-Arts.

As for your question about our scholarship system; We provide scholarships to students with exceptional talent and academical position. We do not provide a list of requirements, for talent cannot be forced, but recognized.

Further information will be provided after your future in our school is decided.

Sincerely,

The vice-principal of École des Beaux-Arts,

Adeline Bisset

Marinette stared wide-eyed at the letter, her expression unchanging. Until she laughed and hugged her mother. Releasing her mother from the hug, she started summarizing what she read but her mother stopped her.

“We received a letter of our own, seemed quite weird at first since not many schools inform the minors and usually consults everything through the parents. They treat their students as equals, it seems.” With each information gained about the school, Marinette was getting more and more excited to have a chance to study there.

She squeaked and hugged her mother again. Sabine, startled by the sudden tackle, fell to the ground with Marinette still holding her in a tight hug.

It was at that exact moment that Tom chose to walk in, back from the delivery.

[masterlist]

#time for a change #marinette dupain cheng #MLB #fanfic #mlb fanfic #ml salt #salt #felinette #felix graham de vanily #Felix Culpa #ml class salt #lila salt #marinette deserves better

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glitterblazercalum · 4 years

Text

got a river for a soul, and baby, you’re a boat

or: Oh, fuck. We showed up wearing matching couples’ costumes to this party by accident and now everyone thinks we’re together.” + cashton

hello and happy halloween everyone!! giant thank u to ainslee @ashesonthefloor for putting this event together!! and for forcing me to actually get this fic done, looking it over, and generally being a major source of serotonin in my life. another huge thank u to bella @clumsyclifford for being one of my favorite people and loving frat boys enough that it made me want to write a fic about them to annoy her <3 love you both <3

here is the link to the event masterpost bc I highly recommend checking out all of the other amazing fics:

https://ashesonthefloor.tumblr.com/post/633534107120549888/hello-welcome-to-my-halloween-fic-event

warnings: mentions of alcohol

word count: 2,872

without further ado, please enjoy the fic I wrote mostly all last night while looping drag me down for thirteen hours straight :))

Calum doesn’t know what fuckhead came up with the idea of having a joint Halloween party for Sigma Nu and Sigma Pi this year, but he really wants to fight them. He thinks he’d probably have a lot of people on his side, considering how much Sig Nu and and Sig Pi hate each other, so he tucks the idea of interfraternity war away in his head as a contingency plan in case the party goes to shit, as joint parties with any other frat always seem to. And it’s not like it’s a one night thing, because all three days of the “Halloweekend,” as Michael refuses to stop calling it, are supposedly going to be spent with Sig Nu, one party at their own house, and two at the shithole that he assumes is the Sig Nu house, in some deranged attempt at bonding. He’ll be lucky to make it out alive, probably.

Before college, he really never did anything of his own for Halloween, mainly used to being used as a prop or side character for his sister Mali-Koa’s elaborate costumes, or, after she’d moved out, sticking a pair of fake fangs in his mouth to hand out candy to the few kids who rang the doorbell despite his efforts to keep all the lights in the house off. Last year, as a freshman, he’d gotten roped into a group costume with some of the other Sig Pi pledges, and while his memories are...hazy at best, he vaguely remembers falling asleep in a Teletubbies onesie at the end of the night.

This year, though, no one has tried to tell him what to dress up as, so it’s now a few hours before the first of the three parties, and Calum still has no ideas for what he should dress up as. A quick Google search for “cheap easy costumes” hadn’t really been all that helpful, so he decides to ignore the problem and take a nap until he actually has to leave.

A few hours later, Michael barges into the room to drag him out of bed, and looks around for a few seconds before asking, “You don’t have a costume, do you?”

Calum groans, pulling himself out of bed and wracking his brain for an idea that he can plausibly bullshit in the next few seconds, because he can’t let Michael be right and have something to tease him about, so he blurts, “I’m going to be a salt shaker.”

Michael gapes at him a bit for a few seconds before asking, “What the fuck? What kind of costume is that? What are you even going to wear for that?”

Calum mentally kicks himself in the shin, as hard as possible, because he really hasn’t thought this through. Why couldn’t he have just said cat or cowboy or something even slightly in the realm of normal Halloween costumes?

“Uhhh.. y’know that baseball tee I have? The one with the black sleeves and white middle?”

“I’m pretty sure that’s in my closet, but continue.”

“What the fuck, dude? Give it back!”

“You haven’t noticed that it’s missing for like three weeks, I just assumed it was mine now. Tell me what the rest of the costume is,” Michael demands.

“I’ll just tape a piece of paper with a big ‘S’ on it to the front of my shirt, and then put one of those pots with the holes on my head. Bam! Salt shaker!” Calum says, moderately impressed with his ability to pull stuff out of his ass this quickly.

“What makes you think we even have a colander?” Michael asks, crossing his arms.

Calum gives him a blank stare. “A what?”

“That’s what the pots with the holes are called, you idiot.”

“You think Harry would live anywhere that didn’t have a fully-stocked kitchen? There’s bound to be one in one of the cabinets or something.”

“Fine. I’ll go get the shirt while you look for the colander.” Before Calum can object, suggest that he look through Michael’s closet himself and steal back any of his other clothes that have somehow wound up there, Michael’s already halfway down the hallway.

Sighing, he trudges down the stairs towards the kitchen, where one of the seniors, Niall, is sitting with his head in his hands, dressed as a pirate.

“Hey, dude, nice costume,” Calum offers as a greeting. “You wouldn’t happen to know where I can find a colander, would you? I know Harry—”

“Do not talk to me about Harry right now,” Niall says, and Calum stops his search for a moment to send him a concerned look.

“What happ—”

“That needy-ass motherfucker thinks that just because I didn’t want to do a couples’ costume with him, it means I don’t love him anymore! Never mind the fact that he literally mentioned this idea to me yesterday, well past the point where everyone finalizes their costumes.”

Calum offers him a sympathetic look and offers, “Couples’ costumes are boring and cheesy anyways. Neither of you are missing out on anything, at least in my opinion.”

Niall lifts his head up from where he’d been repeatedly hitting it on the table to smirk at Calum and ask, “Have a lot of experience with couples’ costumes, do you?”

Luckily, Calum has finally found the colander, so he opts to ignore the question and just leave the kitchen entirely.

When he gets back upstairs, Michael’s in his room, unabashedly checking himself out in the mirror that’s on the back of the closet door. “Yeah, yeah, your anime character of the year looks great, now get out and let me get ready.”

Michael scoffs, “Get ready, as if you’re even doing anything,” but moves towards the door anyway.

Michael’s right, the costume is ridiculously easy to throw together, and two minutes later, they’re both out the door, walking across Fraternity Row to get to the Sig Nu house, where the music is already blaring and strobe lights throw red, then green, then blue shadows across everyone’s faces. On his way to the kitchen to grab a drink, he sees Niall and Harry walk into the house, holding hands and laughing together, so he assumes that their fight has blown over as quickly as all of their other fights always seem to.

He sees a few different trays of shots and decides he might as well take one to get the night started off right. After, he realizes that he probably shouldn’t grab a beer now, Mali’s rule about sticking to one color of booze for the night ringing in his head, so he settles for filling up a Solo cup with whatever glow in the dark gin concoction is in all the punch bowls. He wouldn’t put it past the Sig Nus to poison the drink on purpose, but it tastes relatively normal, so he grabs another cup for Michael and attempts to leave the kitchen, steering around the couple sloppily making out in the doorway.

It’s harder to spot Michael than it usually is, considering that at least half the people at the party are wearing some type of wig, but Calum eventually makes his way back over to him. He’s talking to Niall and Harry, and they both offer him a smile before continuing on with the conversation. Once that reaches a lull, Niall leans closer to Calum and says, “Mate, you didn’t need to lie to me about couples’ costumes.”

Calum has no idea what Niall is talking about, so he shakes his head and asks, “What are you talking about?”

Niall cackles, and Harry turns to look at him adoringly before going back to talking to Michael, and Calum is more confused than ever. Niall grabs his shoulder and spins him around and points in the direction of a clump of people. “You’re salt and he’s pepper, right? That’s such an obvious couples’ costume, although you two do seem to have a bit of a disconnect on how much effort you put in. That guy really went all out. And dude, why haven’t you told us that you have a boyfriend? You know we’d want to know about that, give him the Sig Pi seal of approval and all that. Wait. Unless he’s a Sig Nu, in which case, I don’t want to know because I’d probably have to kick you out. That’s a joke, by the way.”

Calum barely has the presence of mind to mumble, “He’s not my boyfriend,” before crossing the room to get to the guy in the hyper-realistic pepper grinder costume.

The guy smiles as Calum approaches, and despite the costume covering most of his body, Calum can tell that he’s cute. “Why so salty?” Pepper Guy greets, the sunshiney smile still on his face.

Calum smirks and replies, “Maybe I just need some more spice in my life.” Pepper Guy laughs, and just like everything else about him, it’s cute, and Calum wants to hear it again. “I’m Calum, by the way.”

“Ashton. Nice to meet you, man.”

Calum leans a little closer so that it’s easier to hold a conversation over the loud music and asks, “What’s the deal with the super realistic pepper grinder costume?”

Ashton makes a strange noise, somewhere between a laugh and a groan, and says, “I got it off some random sketchy website, but it was supposed to be a chess piece. Something clearly went wrong somewhere in production, and my friend Luke said that I might as well sharpie a “P” onto it and just go with it.”

Calum makes a noise of agreement, mind stuck on a dumb idea. Before he can reconsider, he sends Michael a quick text that says if u’ve already taken over as dj, can u play that come grind w me song? and a few seconds later, he hears the opening notes and grins.

“Hey, Ashton?”

“Yeah?” Ashton replies, as realization slips across his face.

Right in time with the singer’s voice, Calum says, “Come grind with me,” and he laughingly pulls Ashton towards the makeshift dance floor. Neither of them can really dance, so it’s a mess of laughter and limbs flopping around, but Calum feels an unmistakable electricity between them too, and once the song is over, they stay for the next few, enraptured by each other. When they finally exhaust themselves with all the laughing and mock-twerking, Ashton asks Calum if he wants a refill, and when Calum nods, he grabs his hand and starts pulling him towards the kitchen.

Once they’re there, Calum goes for another serving of the glow in the dark punch, which is steadily dimming as the glow sticks run out of light. Since that’s really the only light source in the kitchen, Calum doesn’t see Ashton until he’s turning around and Ashton is right in front of him, reaching around him for a cup. Calum’s kind of trapped with his back against the counter, Ashton’s pepper grinder costume tall enough to really block out the view of the rest of the party, and the world narrows, all of it contained in where their eyes connect, and then, after Calum has safely set his drink back on the counter, that narrow point expands just a bit to where their mouths land on each other’s. The colander gets knocked off Calum’s head as he lifts himself up to sit on the counter, wrapping his legs around Ashton’s waist to pull him closer, as close as he can possibly get him.

Ashton’s sucking a mark into Calum’s neck when Calum has his first coherent thought of the past few minutes and pulls back, breathlessly asking “Wait, wait, you’re not a Sig Nu, are you?” fully expecting the answer to be no.

Ashton steps back a little too, and it takes him a second to register the question before he groans, “Of course you’re a fucking Sig Pi, that’s the only explanation that makes sense for me never seeing you anywhere before. You’re too hot for me to not notice otherwise.”

Calum flushes and mentally curses out whatever idiots had started the rivalry between Sig Nu and Sig Pi before he grabs his stupid colander off the ground and gives Ashton an awkward wave goodbye.

Once he’s out of the kitchen, he quickly glances around in search of Michael, and when he can’t immediately find him, he just gives up and leaves entirely. Fuck Sig Nu.

He spends most of the next day bitching about his hangover, and then, a few hours later, bitching about his hangover while helping to set up the house for that night’s party.

He doesn’t really have much more of a costume for tonight, throwing on a gray shirt and sharpie-ing some whiskers on his face. Michael takes pity on him and makes him a headband with an approximation of what they both think mouse ears are, and Calum is mildly entertained by going up to everyone and saying, “I’m a mouse, duh.”

His heart’s really not in the right place to party tonight, which is probably breaking the cardinal rule of being in a frat, so he sticks close to Michael, who has taken over the role of DJ, once again. Zayn from Alpha Sig strolls over after about half an hour, devil horns askew, and quietly says to Calum, “Cat and mouse, huh? Didn’t think you had it in you, Hood, that’s proper cute. Not as cute as me and Lou, mind you, but still, I respect the effort.”

Calum is reluctant to look up and see who he’s accidentally matching with today, because, with his luck, it’s probably another guy from Sig Nu. When he does eventually look up, he immediately makes eye contact with Ashton, who happens to be walking by, dressed in all black and with whiskers sharpie’d onto his face too. Calum wants to bang his head into a wall because the universe clearly hates him if it’s having him match with Ashton again. Even beyond that, Ashton looks so good out of the stupid pepper grinder and in all black that Calum wants to make out with him again.

Ashton is clearly having similar thoughts when he gestures Calum over and leads them towards a little pocket of quiet space in one of the lesser used hallways.

Calum really wants to hook his thumb into one of Ashton’s belt loops, so he does, as Ashton looks him up and down a few times. “Is the mouse costume your way of telling me you want me to chase you?”

Calum murmurs, “Shut up,” before leaning in to kiss him, frat rivalry be damned. It’s just as good as it was the night before, maybe even more so, now that the pepper costume isn’t in their way. At this point, there’s no denying the chemistry. It can’t be blamed on being drunk since Calum’s been nursing the same beer all night, and the part of his brain that’s protesting against being this close to a Sig Nu is getting smaller and smaller as he and Ashton continue to kiss.

They stay in that hallway for the rest of the night, eventually sliding down to sit on the ground, legs pressed together, sharing stupid stories about their respective frats. Calum’s surprised when the music shuts off because it feels like it’s only been an hour at most, that’s how easy it is to talk to Ashton. Ashton heaves himself up and reaches both hands down to help Calum up, too.

“I don’t think there’s any way you can match your costume to mine tomorrow, but I’ll come find you anyways,” Ashton says, as he leaves Calum with a kiss on the cheek.

Calum’s too wired to sleep much, so he opts to help clean up the house instead, and that takes up enough of his day that when nighttime rolls around, he’s stood staring at his closet without a costume idea for the third time in as many days. After ten minutes of consideration, he digs through one of his drawers to pull out the fake vampire fangs that he had somehow remembered to bring with him, and he goes down the hall to ask Jack to put some fake blood on his mouth and neck. Jack always goes all out for Halloween.

Once he’s at the party, he doesn’t have to wait long to find Ashton, who looks incredibly good in his werewolf costume. There’s fake blood on him too, which is really the only way their costumes could be understood to be matching, or so Calum thinks. Tonight, Jack and Alex are the ones to tease him, “You know what, I agree. Jacob and Edward should have ended up together, Bella was boring as shit.”

Calum’s really not bothered by the comments at all, so much so that he’s already thinking of couples’ costumes ideas for next year when he finds his way over to Ashton and whispers, “Let’s get out of here.”

“Are you trying to make a move on me? I’m a respectable Sigma Nu, I don’t know if I can allow that.”

Calum laughs and tugs him out the door, “Told you I wanted some more spice in my life.”

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its-bound-to-get-loud · 3 years

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Ashton Irwin is not straight: a masterpost

It’s been a while since I’ve written a masterpost, but I’ve been meaning to get back into it for a while now. Giving a voice to some of my personal ideas is the main reason to start this blog in the first place. I’ve made a similar post about Michael several months ago. I can highly recommend checking that one out as well. This one will probably be a bit shorter than that one, since Michael has been banging on that closet door a ton, while Ashton is a little more subtle.

Before you continue reading, a quick disclaimer. If the idea that Ashton may not be straight makes you uncomfortable. Please do not continue reading. However, if you have an open mind and are willing to entertain other ideas than your own or if you share my ideas (based on the title) you are more than welcome to continue.

Finally, I’m asking you. Please, under no circumstance ever show my posts to any of the guys or people close to them. The posts that I make are meant for fandom discussion only. You can share them with friends, you can talk about them, just do not share them with the guys or the people around them. Also, I will not be publicly speculating about what label (sexuality) the guys may identify as. This is something very personal and it’s up to them to decide how they want to or don’t want to identify as. However, I do believe that at least Ashton, Luke and Michael are not straight. I haven’t completely made up my mind about Calum, but I think there are definitely certain signs that he may not be straight. I’m aware that a lot of people believe in Cashton as a couple. Personally at the moment I’m posting this I do not believe they are (or were) a couple. I understand why people think they are dating, I have seen plenty of Cashton evidence, but nothing has absolutely convinced me so far. They are super cute and I absolutely ship them though, I would love nothing more than to be wrong about this. Now that we have gotten all of that out of the way, let’s get to the reasons I think Ashton is not straight,

I do not have as many reasons for Ashton not being straight as I do for Michael, who has been incredibly vocal about not being straight. Ashton however has thrown a few hints out there and I am receiving them loud and clear. For me the first thing that pointed me towards Ashton not being straight sounds a bit vague. It was his demeanor, the way he acts, the way he carries himself. Ashton is very flamboyant in the way he acts. You know how you see someone you don’t know, but instantly know they’re not straight because of the way they behave? That’s exactly what I see when I look at Ashton. It’s hard to put into words, but if you don’t know what I mean I highly suggest googling the definition of flamboyant, I’d say it fits quite well with Ashton. Now I know this is very much a stereotype and not everyone who is flamboyant is gay* and vice versa, so this doesn’t make what I say a fact (unless Ashton comes out and says he’s not straight, this whole post is speculation). But those stereotypes do exist for a reason, they may not apply to everyone, but they do exist for some.

* I’m using gay as an umbrella term here, I don’t mean to imply he is only into guys. Simply that he is not straight.

“Girl and/or boy”

The following moment of the guys explaining what Don’t Stop is about can be interpreted in many ways. It starts with Luke saying the song is about a girl at a party, that everyone wants to take home to “hang out” with. Then after some further talk at 0:53 Ashton says “It’s just about a girl who everyone wants at a party basically. And/or boy”. Now this can be interpreted as a girl seeing a boy at a party who she likes. It could be a general statement that some boys aren’t (just) interested in girls, but (also) in boys and he’s trying to be inclusive. Which is not out of character for Ashton I’d say. It could also be a little more personal. Maybe meaning that he might not (just) be interested in girls. Personally I think it might be a combination, it’s a blanket statement that leaves plenty of room for plausible deniability, should there ever be a need for further explanation.

“I don’t wanna tug any of ya”

The fact that nobody is talking about this at all is at least surprising. I get that the interview is a few years old, but even in the comments I don’t see anything about it. At 2:19 the interviewer asks them who would win in a tug of war competition between 1D and 5SOS. After some back and forth talk, their answer nears an ending, but not before Ashton jokes “I don’t wanna tug any of ya” at 2:36 and letting out an adorable giggle. Michael doesn’t seem to take notice of what Ashton is saying. However Luke and Calum definitely get it. Now if there was any doubt about what Ashton would mean by tug. Just take a look at the Urban Dictionary. So Ashton jokes he doesn’t want to tug any of his bandmates. Does that mean he would like to tug someone else perhaps? This may have been a simple teenage joke and nothing else, but I think it’s important to at least take notice of.

“It’s not a guy”

This moment is honestly iconic, I don’t know what else to say. In this video they get asked some random stuff such as “first band you saw live” and in this case “favorite hometown spot”. 20 seconds into this video and Ashton does a shout out to Frankie’s in Sydney. Which is all fine, but what follows is where it really gets interesting. He says “spent way too much time in you”. This could just be a bit of unfortunate phrasing, sometimes our brain to mouth filter works in weird ways. Then Luke feels the need to add “it’s a rock bar”. This smells like damage control to me. They could have just laughed it off and made it into a joke. I mean, Ashton says a lot of ridiculous stuff at times, so this wouldn’t even be that much out of character. Ashton however must’ve felt defiant that day, because he decides to add fuel to the fire by saying “it’s not a guy”. Then he smirks while looking off camera. He is well aware of what he’s saying and I 100% believe he saw an opportunity and took it. Also a special shout out to Calum’s face after Ashton said “it’s not a guy”. Also, the fact that he says guy and not girl is something to take notice of. Now in all truthfulness, if he’d said girl it would have sounded rather gross and I probably would have to scold him myself. But I’d say Frankie is an androgynous name that doesn’t stereotypically belong to any specific gender.

“Boys, boys, boys”

5SOS reads thirst tweets is iconic as a whole, but one of my favorite moments is “boys, boys, boys”. It starts with Ashton reading the tweet, followed by Luke going “you can’t say boys like that”. Ashton being Ashton doesn’t like being told what to do, so he decided to be extra and repeat himself a couple of times. Now this may just be Ashton being defiant. But there is an extra added layer to what he says and how he says it. The way he says it is just so flamboyant, the way he stares into the camera he knows what he’s saying.

“If Walls Could Talk”

There is a reason I called my blog its-bound-to-get-loud and the reason is obviously this song. The moment I realized what the lyrics to this song were I had to look them up, cause it sounded a lot like a closeting song to me. After reading the lyrics that thought was solidified in my brain. I have written an extensive analysis of the whole song together with R. If you want to know more about our interpretation of the song, read our analysis here.

This has been my masterpost about Ashton not being straight. As always, this post is speculation based on my personal opinions. I hope it brought some new ideas to people who maybe didn’t think of this before. I’d love to hear your reaction if you have read this. You don’t have to agree with me, as long as we can have a friendly conversation about our differences I’d say we’re good. If you liked this post, please reblog it so other can read it as well. Tumblr absolutely sucks in getting my posts to show up in the search results and I don’t have a ton of followers either. So any reblogs are very welcome. A big thank you @full-of-lonely-people and @ashtons-ass for proofreading this for me. Your effort is very much appreciated!

#5 Seconds of Summer #5SOS #Ashton Irwin #Cashton #original #masterpost

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gaykey · 3 years

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Sorry to bother you with this sudden question, and I'm not here to have a fight or anything, just want to know how you feel.Do you think it's alright that non black people wear braids?If not,could you share your point?

It would be delighting for me if my idols wear my culture's traditional clothes or hairstyle, because I think they appreciate it and carry forward my country.So it was a bit shock when I learned about the controversy of "Cultural Appropriation".

Please don't be offended by the question, if it makes you uncomfortable you can just ignore it.

lol wow, ok. good morning.

this is a bit much for me first thing, so, i'll probably type of my thoughts now, and tidy it up to post later.

right so, i'm really gonna try and keep this concise, and not go on a rant, but, if i do, i'll put it under a read more.

to get right to the point, no, i do not think it's ok that non-black people wear braids.

black people have been mocked, ridiculed and singled out for literally hundreds of years, for their hair, and how they wear it, so, when a non black person comes along, and decides they want to try it out for a week, because suddenly they think it's cool and trendy, yes it's incredibly offensive.

they have no knowledge of the history behind those hairstyles, or even the practical, or cultural reasons, they're worn. also, ehy is it so hard for non blacks to understand that those styles are not for them? they're not for their hair types. but anyway

people treat blackness as a costume you can put on and take off whenever you feel like. all the benefits without the pesky trouble of actually having to be black.

that's not appreciating a culture, or carrying it forward, or bringing it to more people. it's just stealing the bare bones of it for aesthetic reasons.

especially with artists. they use blackness (music, style ect.) to further their career, and entrench themselves in the culture, because they know it will sell more music, it's not because they're super interested in the history of black music...it's because they know it's popular at the moment. that's exploitative.

i'm gonna talk about jesy nelson real quick because she's been pissing me off especially lately.

look at this white woman

she says that she's always been inspired and is a huge fan of 90's/early 2000's r&b, which is the style of music she's gone for with her solo debut (apparently. i refuse to listen to her shitty song).

why does she need to wear a shitty wig, and darken her skin, just because she likes r&b? the music video is awful and rife with bad parodies of what jesy thinks black culture is. (from what i've seen through screencaps.)

this isn't black culture, this is a mockery. it's outright blackface. and she's doing it to sell records.

which is the case when kpop idols do it. it's all to sell music.

she's been called out so heavily, by fans and also her ex-bandmate leigh-anne pinnock, who is black. but jesy feels vindicated because she's being backed by a black woman (nicki minaj), which is so common sadly. all it takes is one stupid black person to have a white person feel justified in their blackfishing antics.

now, i don't know what country you're from, anon, but all of this isn't like someone from bts saying they love italian culture because they love pizza.

because italians don't have a long history of being singled out mocked, threatened, killed, for their culture, like many many other ethnic minorities have, and still do.

now, i'm not the best source of info for this, because i am just one person, so i highly recommend you watch some videos, and read some articles and essays on the topic of cultural appropriation. google is your friend.

but here are my not very coherent thoughts and opinions for you, anon.

#anon #out of curiosity - why did you come to me?#also sorry meant to post this yesterday and forgot

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