#theres a lot of personal stuff im not putting in here for personal reasons but i may make stuff on it later

[todayisafridaynight]

I’m fairly new to the fandom, but I do have a question if you can answer it! Why do people ship Daigo with Aoki / Masato? I tried looking to see if they’ve interacted before, but couldn’t find anything! Sorry for asking I’m just </3 dumb AND I LOVE YOUR ART OF THEM!!! Nerd looking ahhhhhh

hi ! welcome to the community i hope you're having a lovely time so far and ty for enjoyin my stuff :) no need for apologies it's a very fair question to have :]

i cant speak for everyone (all. ten people into masadai anyway) but Personally To Me i just think the idea of them together is very funny. thats quite literally it im afraid..

#snap chats #//twenty page google doc in the background// ignore that. it's mostly for comedic purposes #might also be my fault idk sorry about that. allegedly. idk ive had like three people tell me they started to ship them cause of me 🧍‍♂️ #@mementoasts is another person who's drawn masadai and whose stuff i love and am inspod by .. i love their disneyland fic sm ... #there was another artist on twitter who posted a neat drawing of them but i cant remember who they were and i didnt bookmark it //screams// #recently there's been ANOTHER masadai artist ive started following on twitter - @wifekiryu. his account's n/s/f/w fyi before you go looking #he has a tumblr too @foxdies. i say cause i realized as much recently vjeaKLGJALKGJ #oh but I GUESS ill get deeper into why. /i/ personally ship masadai or whatever #first off they're opposing factions yet their character alignments Do Not Match their roles. stereotypically anyway #aoki who leads the 'surface' of society and is meant to be an admirable figure and someone 'just' when really. he sucks LMAO #though that's not atypical of politicians but just from a stereotypical This Is A Respectable Individual perspective of his role #daigo on the other hand leads the 'underbelly' of society- yk comprised of dangerous criminals and outcasts and whatnot #yet as we know him daigo's compassionate and considerate of his men- he doesnt treat them like tools like aoki does #if put in a room with the two daigo would be most people's choice of person to hang out with. probably open a trapdoor on aoki tbh #and i think thats really cool and epic i always love that kinda Subverting Expectations thing #theres also the fact they both started off like. edgy/angsty in the franchise and then brush up down the line #masato does a stronger 180. publicly. obviously but its still really funny they both have to get their act together #if you wanna talk about in-text reasons. there really is none LMAO I TELLS YOU masadai is pure crack #but if i wanted to pull a muscle reaching then there's daigo being on aoki's side while everyone else is on arakawa's during the funeral #im lying of course. mitsu was behind him. rgg tryna make me forget mitsu exist .... put him back in y8 .... #and ofc ichi joins that side to even out the seating but moving on another Goofy Reason is arakawa being like #'the chairman and my son are like p much the same age Surely he knows how he thinks :)' #and then i just think daigo being all smarmy about outsmarting aoki is really goofy and im choosing to interpret that as personal #they both also have issues with their dad. s. dad/s/. anyway. #tbh the google doc tag was a joke but i really could sit here and list every dumb reason why i think theyre funny together #like i started going over the tag limit so uhhhh yeah needless to say i have a lot of. dumb reasons 💀💀💀💀 #one day ill use the main text for long rambles like this but todays not that day Point Is my imagination is rampant im afraid #so the short and sweet of it is I Think It's Funny. And They'd Be Terrible Together. Which Is Why It's Funny. #and the unfortunate part is anything i find funny i obsess over for a year so. //gestures to the mountain of bullshit thats my masadai tag/

[fortunately-bi]

...... If I went on a hiatus for who knows how long again would y'all hate me....... 👉👈

#i just spent like an hour writing and rewriting a post trying to explain myself amd its just so hard to put into words #im bored here but not in a ew not enough content for the dopamine hit shit #in like a every time i scroll through I dont smile I dont see anything that makes me happy at all i dont get a laugh or anything #its just mindless brain rotting scrolling nothing wasting my time hoping maybe ill see a new artist to follow or something #and every time its nothing #so much nothing taking up so much of my time and space in my life and i already dont have a lot of time to begin with #ive made some awesome friends here ive had lovers from here ive had people who are no longer on this earth from here who ill never forget #i dont think ive really enjoyed anything on here in 7 years #ive left before for a really long time i think like a year or more or something #and i wont be totally unreachable of people message me ill respond but im so sick of this stupid app taking up my life #and all i ever get out of it is getting mad or getting depressed over shit that really is t worth my mental state over #all i ever feel on here is that the world fuckin sucks and theres not even anything here to make hanging around worth it #im not new to this site making me suicidal for an abundance of reasons and im luckily in a spot where i wont actually hurt myself #its just ideation and intrusive thoughts but its a pattern i cant keep ignoring #also im old tumblr im old tumblr and i think i will always be old tumblr im just not catching on to new shit anymore #the fact im even saying anything about a hiatus should show how pld tumblr i am no one does this anymore lol #i just don't want to be here anymore i dont really want to be anywhere online anymore tbh #its always something and i cant mentally keep up with it anymore i have too much going on in my life #my wife is having cancer removed on Tuesday im a lead teacher who has to take care of i think 8 babies now #i have problems i have actual problems that need me and need me to be as there as i can be #i cant be spiraling over stuff online on top of real world problems im in no position to do anything about on top of personal life problems #that are drastically affecting my life at home and hurting my family and loved ones #i have a mass in my thyroid which is so big i choke to the point i stop breathing if I dont have my meds i throw up all day #i have to see a neurologist because at best i have a pinched nerve at worst im having seizures and i might have to move states again #i dont have it in me to come on here and see stuff that makes me upset for the chance i might see something i like #and i can unfollow people and whatever but I dont have the energy or time to sift through people i follow on here #if you want to talk in dms or asks or you want to send me posts pls by all means continue to do so thats fine #but i think i need to take the app out of my line of sight again for a bit and just be in the moment again same with twitter #anyways i love yall i promise i am safe and not in harms way im just stressed af and i have got to start cutting things out that #arent doing anything other then making me miserable

[livinwa]

I have recently learned that I don't have an original experience, under the guise that each day I prove to be more and more nerodivergent as time passes by and the question of "am i really? Maybe I'm just attention seeking" just sort if becomes a denial rather than a question.

Here's a bunch of things I think are signs and or could be debunked but I need opinions ti be able to figure myself out and stuff, so maybe enjoy the drama and stuff???

1. I thought I was able to look people in the eyes, no I'm not, not unless I'm comfortable with that person and/or the situation is like really awkward then I actually physically can't look at them in the FACE.

2. My jacket. The thing my avatar has, its my comfort item. One night I couldn't stop crying and had the thought "put the jacket on" and I did and I ended up being able to finally calm down and breath despite the tears not stopping. I felt safe.

3. Headphones. Once more another comfort item. I dont like leaving anywhere without them. Their as much as a trademark as my jacket and blue jeans.

4. Speaking of blue jeans (this could also be a self esteem thing I dont have a high ar on that) I don't like wearing certain clothes outside nor do I like wearing certain clothes to sleep or in my bed. My preferred fashion senses have always pertained to what I loved to wear and feel on my skin (let it be known I had a navy blue jacket at all times like this one sort of that I outgrew in middle school and a different jacket that held my special interest on it)

5. Speaking of special interests, TRANSFORMERS. that shit took over my life so fast you'd think that I was driving a nasa car with the way I dove headfirst into making that bitch an extraterrestrial. And while of course I grew out of things transformers is ALWAYS THERE and NEVER GOING AWAY no matter how much I dont talk about it with other people (that's what this blog is for)

6. Sensory shit. I dont care what something smells like I am going to get a whiff. Smells bad? Okay let me make sure. Smells good? I'm following it like a cartoon character ti a white steam trail. The only time I dont like a smell is when its so strong it literally makes me gag. I like smells but don't mix and match and crank it to eleven (also sugar cookies and cigarettes dont mix at all) this also goes for biting. I bite. So much.

7. Sensory OVERLOADS. I HAVE HAD TBOSE BEFORE APPARENTLY. Though absolutely they are rare. Is there a spectrum to how people deal with sensory overloads? I don't know and thats why I'm asking questions. I would be doing the dishes and the waters running the forks are clanging and the kids are screaming and the one little guy that I hate (sibling) is repeating the same phrase over and over in the most annoying way possible and I just can't take it anymore so I shut myself down to forcefully finish this task because I know what's going to happen if I don't and eventually in a groggy something something morning voice I tell him to shut the fuck up and it helps. If he listens.

8. For as long as I've known, I love food. And I have recently known, food equals a pattern in household. Not only food but the day has a type of pattern as well, and it directly connects to the type of food too. In simple terms so I don't spill guts along with blood, to little, irritable, find other ways to find needed things, a lot, the days okay and conversations light.

9. I have come to the epiphany that eggs are my comfort food. It doesn't matter how their made most of the time I will eat eggs in nearly any form I have LITERALLY had a daily/weekly limit to how many eggs i make a day forced onto me because eggs are too expensive.

10. I cant remember shit but most importantly I cant remember where I put items sometimes almost immedietly after I either set it down or look at something that has relative importance. I have forgotten I put my pencil in my backpack literal seconds after I put it in there, and mutual can attest to my lack of remembering exactly what I said unless it had great importance or funny capacity.

11. I have been stimming for as long as I have known and before I knew what stimming even was. Flappy hands and unusual sounds. I liked the sound of a whistle so much I ended up creating my own verbal stim that I used to this day. (Learned how to whistle a year later)

12. Masking. From what I was exposed to and understand its basically the ability to put on a mask and different facade for the general public compared to what was within, until 6th grade I actually barely had freinds (was really nice, had no/2 enemies in my life(very weird one was a literal frenemy)) and often was just walking around until I played games with others because those had rules and didn't involve too much small talk and I was happy to play in those games. But that was it. Then in 6th grade I gained the facade of happy and chill guy that never really got sad, the works.

This is not all but enjoy the blood sweat and tears of this... whole thing. I'm confused im tired and I'm simply trying to figure things out.

#nerudivergent #nerudivergancy #adhd #maybe #probably may delete later #autism too? #theres a lot of things #maladaptiveness maybe but that isnt the focus of this thing #idk man #theres a lot of personal stuff im not putting in here for personal reasons but i may make stuff on it later #theres also the specific things that can happen in specific conditions that arent trauma related that is actually pretty funny #like sleep patterns. #sleep in class and only in freinds cars comfortably outside of my bed #lwd to some funny things

[rzyraffek]

Slashers with y/n that just gets along with everything

Like slasher could litteraly kill somone near y/n and she would be like alr alr whats really important is that you are happy🤠😎. Im sorry that first 2character had super long headcanons while last ones have way less :( I had no ideas Request open!

Billy Lenz

He always expects some sort of negative response when he calls people and when he heard new voice on the Phone he got even more exited cuz new person new reaction! He totally didnt expect her to just go "yeah yeah sure buddy, anyways... how is your day man? Cuz im so so tired...*starts normal converstation*

He probably tries to stay in character but he is so caught of Guard he doesnt know how to react really (hehe the table has turn)

Now he kinda hopes that she will pick up cuz shes very intresting😈 billy likey

"Ew its this creep again! He is asking for you y/n? Of please dont tell me you befriended him??" "So what? He said hes favourite fruit is strawberry he cant be that bad!" *billy saying slurs on the phone*

You need to constantly tell him that, no Billy no harrasing women isnt sexy, you arent quirky, you are mentally ill

"Y/n i killed that bitch that was gossiping about you 🧍 " "👍good for you billy im glad you found healthy way to cope with that negative emotion😇" "on god"

His whole moral compass is created around the simple question 'does it hurt y/n?' .1:no it doesnt so feel free to do it .2 do not do it, she will ban Billy from sweets (bad ending)

The man from hush

This guy. This dude. This Little gremlin. He is upset that he gets no reaction! Like please oh please act all angy when he 'acidently' shot tire in her car! But oh no ofc no, she had to be like "oh its okay honey i have backup in garage🥰" hes like HHUH SINCE WHEN WE HAVE GARAGE

Like tbh thats how i imagine how they met: he saw her, he wanted to hunt her, she was so chill that she didnt even leave her household while the power was off and he went inside and just saw her having lil nap on couch. 🧍🤨erm exuse me gurl im trying to roleplay epic hunter here tf

He probably kidnaped her cuz she was too weird to just kill her but he didnt want to risk her calling police. He probably tied her up and yeeted her on backseats. And then she begun judging music on the radio"yo big guy can i get some good music taste?" "What? Whats wrong with Taylor Swift?"

He will overshare everything to kinda check where is her limit if it comes to being chill "yeah so i killed this old lady.." "im sure you had good reason🥰" "🤨... anyways... yeah so i was drinking some redbull when some guy said i look ugly so i shoot his head off and-" "HEY HEY hold up geez you CANT drink Energy drinks?? Bestie you know it is unhealthy?? Also you like hunt for sport it will ruin your condition!? How you gonna shoot people with shakey hands?? You crazy or something?" "Damn😔"

Micheal myers

I tried to put him here but i realised he will be as chill as her.

Like he can give her gifts covered in blood and she' just going to clean it and wear it like nothing happened or completley ignore it

He cares about this stuff as much as y/n so like not at all. I mean tbh theres is a bit of difrence: shes at least positive about it! Like "yeah micheal go for it, love🥰😇 i know its hard to cope with trauma take it all out alr?" Shes trying to be a good supporting gf not her fault she never had serial killer bf!

Brahms Heelshire

He lives for attention! What do you mean the war crime he commited this lunch break is okay!?!? Baby pleasee

But this negativity disapears the moment he realised he can get a lot of positive attention when he will do some nice stuff! "Oh honey I didnt kill any rats today" "oh that's amazing brahms I'm sure you and the rats inside walls will get along well soon🥰" (rats in walls bully brahms)

Please complement him or he will get a tantrum and destroy something

Brahms and rats have very hard past i might do seperate hc about that

Ghostface

"Look babe! My newest victim *shows photo*" "ugh baby...😰 you NEED to buy new camera or watch some youtube tutorials about how to take good photos" "aw man whats wrong with my pictures 😔"

Otherwise y/n supports his hobbies! People need to grow😇 (and he needs to grow up)

If theres 2ghostfaces(like in most movies) they will bet money on how long you gonna keep this 'do whatever as long as youre happy' act. Well they didnt know that this wasnt an act but her personality

Also they will probably try to use this chillnes aginst her like "oooh y/n something terrible happened! I crushed my car oh what will i do!" "Alr bestie i will drive you over there😇" "😈omg you are so nice i totally didnt expect that(heheh i dont need to pay for gas today (hes very evil))

#slasher x reader #slasher headcanons #billy lenz #billy lenz x reader #brahms heelsire #brahms x reader #micheal myers #micheal myers x reader #ghostface x reader #ghostface #hush headcanon #hush 2016 #hush x reader #the man x reader

[agirlwithglam]

how to develop self love and confidence

— a step by step guide by yours truly ♥

disclaimer!! for some people it can take a lot longer to love themselves than others, so don't be discouraged if it takes a bit longer. just remember that no matter what you think, you ARE WORTHY OF LOVE.

step 1: identifying the root cause

first you need to find WHY you dont love yourself. it usually comes down to these main reasons:

society

your looks

comparison

your abilities

childhood trauma

your current situations

it can be just one or more than one, and sometimes it may not be as simple as "my looks", sometimes you may have to dig deeper.

for me, it was because i thought i was "ugly"

step 2: once you know the WHY, research about the topic and try and solve it.

here ive broken down the 6 reasons to help you a bit: (but remember that this is just a small break down, if you want you can research more about the topic & try to battle it)

society: society has tricked us into believing that loving yourself is considered 'vain' or 'narcissistic'. let me tell you right now that THAT IS NOT TRUE. loving yourself is a basic necessity that everyone should have!!

your looks: this is something i struggled with for a loong time. remember that beauty is subjective!! bob could think that travis looks 'average' but Leo could think that travis looks absolutely gorgeous!! ☆ so how did i overcome this? i actually 'glowed up'. bc the main thing i didnt like was face- my teeth to be specific. so once i got braces, my teeth aligned and i started looking so much better. ☆ other struggles: ↴ for you if it may be acne, then you could start trying to take care of your skin better. or if its body image then if you reeeeally dont like it then literally just start working out. if you have the option to yet you still dont then dont complain. but remember that ALL BODIES ARE PERFECT. ★ another thing that helped me a lot was affirmations! i listened to a bunch of affirmations -> i used this video by thewizardliz and it did wonders! (you can also search up on yt self-love/ beauty affirmations)

comparison: for most people comparison comes from social media right? the simple solution to this would be unfollow accounts that dont serve you, or delete/ set a time limit on the social media platform "but what if i compare myself to people i meet in real life?" well we can't exactly unfollow or delete these people but what we can do is turn that jealousy (yes, jealousy) into inspiration! be inspired by the people with greater lives and use that to pull yourself forward! ☆ a quote that i read once (that may or may not help you) : "do not compare your chapter 1 to someone else's chapter 50." you never know what the other person has gone through or is going through that got them to this point!

your abilities: okay theres not much i can say here except that you can learn almost everything online nowadays. stop complaining and get off your lazy butt to prove to yourself just how much potential you have! (but don't beat yourself up for being a lazy butt, im one as well) here is a link to a TON of stuff you can learn online!

childhood trauma: this is a bit of a more delicate subject which i do not know a lot on, my best suggestion would be to just go to therapy (or use an online therapy app- betterhelp). - watching thewizardliz may help as well as she might know more about the topic.

your current situation: whether its trouble with friends, at school, at work, or with family i promise you that these things do not last forever. humans were not put on earth to be unhappy and miserable! (whats the point in that?) my advice is to learn more about the topic (for ex i was struggling with being left out w friends for a while and it did hurt a bit) and see what you can do to fix it or at least make the best out of it. + another reminder that you can use the law of assumption- in basic words the law states that whatever you desire, you have. all you need to do is accept that. heres a quote i read: "if you dont like where you are,, then move. you aint a tree." this is literally YOUR life. RESPECT yourself and dont let people treat you bad because that is disrespecting yourself!

step 3: focus on yourself!!

my favourite step!!

this is your sign to stop focussing on others' lives and start focussing on your own.

when you start to focus on yourself, up level yourself and try to become your best version of yourself, you actually end up falling in love with that version of yourself, and your current version!

ask yourself: is there even something to love?

ask yourself: would you want to date or be friends with someone like you? think actually deep about this; if your answer is no, then that obviously means that there is some work to do.

if you're constantly negative and complaining and rude all the time, trust me, literally no ones gonna want to hang out with you. and then you'll adopt that 'victim mindset' of "nobody likes me and i suck". instead of doing that, why dont you try to just suck a bit less? there isn't any pressure on you to become amazing the next day, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try.

small things/habits to start:

gratitude

hydration

exercising

journalling

meditation

eating healthy

developing a skill

get enough sleep

take cold showers

taking care of your skin

invest in your appearance

focussing on school/ your grades

go outside! go for walks, be in nature!

changing what you consume (resources below)

some resources that helped me SO MUCH:

♡ thewizardliz

♡ tam kaur

♡ persephone's mind

and meditation! its so extremely underated but SO VALUABLE.

xoxo, vanilla

#agirlwithglam🎀✨ #it girl tips💗💋 #vanilla self improvement⭐️ #self love #it girl #girlblog #confidence #self improvement #self validation #self worth #self love guide #that girl #girlblogging #that girl tips #it girl tips #it girl energy #confidence guide #confidence tips

[the-bonfires-ember]

ok so this has a lot of facets so bear with me. standard disclaimer that this is all based on my personal experiences as a narcissistic sociopath; im not a professional and i dont speak for everyone.

anyway.

firstly, yes we do. i think prosocials/egotypicals do it too to an extent but for different reasons and in different ways.

from an aspd perspective, i get annoyed at people and it is no longer to my benefit to stick around them, ill just disappear in a classic ghosting style. frankly i never get to this point anymore because ive managed to surround myself with people i very rarely if ever find annoying. in the past, when ive befriended people and then theyve frustrated me or ive just generally found them annoying for some reason, ive either slowly extricated myself if i could keep getting stuff out of the person or just totally destroyed the relationship so that they stopped reaching out and i could stop expending energy into dodging them. in my head if someone has pissed me off, it means that its going to keep happening and theyve just finally shown me their true colours so i might as well get out now or detach myself so im not going to emotionally invested enough to get annoyed again in the future. essentially this means i stop caring about them at all. as for how fear factors in; it goes a pretty long way back into people being fundamentally untrustworthy and only beneficial in as much as i can get from them. if im putting up with more than im getting out of it, id just walk away because everyone is out for themselves and of course that applies to me too. thats the way ive been taught the world works, and if im not getting any emotional backlash for doing that, why wouldnt i? it just makes sense. im fundamentally out for myself because no one else has been there to help when i needed them in the past.

from an npd perspective, if someones annoying me its likely because i am thinking of myself as being vastly superior to them and find the annoying quirks of them to be proof of their inferiority. the fact that theyve disagreed with me or fought me on something means they dont have the degree of respect and admiration for me that they should. this usually leads to me discarding them out of frustration and ill push them away by just showing less and less interest in them, or the ways i would that i mentioned above. the fear here, as you may be able to guess, is being wrong and being weaker/worse/unworthy. for me, being right and being more esteemed than my peers was a matter of survival in my childhood, and now if someone is starting to chip into the veneer or perfection ive built and maintained they have become a threat and i have to separate before they see too much and i lose everything.

now i dont know why you - orginal messager - asked this question, or why anyone else might be looking for this informatio. i can come up with a few guesses though, so im gonna add a couple things that applies to prosocials and other things that apply to antisocials and narcissists. but ill tuck that away so you can ignore my advice if you want to and just take the analysis.

prosocials - if you have a friend with either of these personality disorders and they are beginning to withdraw theres a choice before you. firstly, you can let them. you can recognise that this person doesnt want to associate with you anymore for whatever reason and allow yourself to be at peace with that. im sure it hurts, especially after what ive said about my reasons for doing this, but if you think you are better off just letting this one go, i support that and encourage you to just slip away with a clean break.

the other option you have, if you want to try your best to keep that person with you, is to address it plain as day. its uncomfortable, yes, but try not to be confrontational. a simple 'hey, ive noticed you distancing yourself and withdrawing and i wanted to check in and find out why and whether or not we can resolve this'. perhaps its cold of me to ask this of you, im not entirely certain one way or the other. but you deserve to try and make it work if thats what you want, and the only way that happens is by addressing the problems and really, truly understanding that the behaviours we exhibit come from a place of fear and the memory of pain. they are trauma disorders. and while trauma does not excuse harmful behaviours it does no one any favours to ignore that its the root of the problem. maybe your friend will brush you off, thats true. they might not be ready to look deeper and thats their right. at which point youve done all you can and now you need to prioritise yourself. but maybe youll make your friend reevaluate, maybe they want to heal. and you can be such a huge part of that by just asking the questions and really listening to the response. its hard work, i know, but i will always be so grateful for the people who made me stop and look at myself and really see.

the third choice is you pretend its not happening and just wait to see if they get past it and come back. they might, its not implausible, but to me this feels like inviting yourself to be treated poorly again later when symptoms flare again and those fears react to something you dont understand or know about.

pwASPD and/or NPD - im not going to try and tell you that you owe it to the people around you to recover. im never saying that. recovery is your decision and it should only be for you. i chose recovery because i wanted to see what i wasnt able to before, and it has been so fucking hard. but id do it again in a heartbeat. its important to note though that i got lucky. really really fucking lucky, and id be doing you a disservice if i pretended otherwise. on that note, here is my advice for those who want to get better and those who dont:

if you dont, if you dont want to see the fear that is reacting to the perceived threat, if its still too painful to look at, just dont. let yourself be blind to it and find comfort in the ways you can. its not cowardly, and its not pathetic. sometimes forcing yourself to stare into a fire is more damaging than its worth, and you are the only one who can decide if it is or not. only you know how close to that fire you are. perhaps its better to distance yourself from this person even if its just for now, or perhaps its better to leave entirely. it depends on how uncomfortable you feel. but i suggest figuring it out quickly and saving yourself the trouble that will come if you string someone along for too long. its always blown up in my face eventually, for what my experience is worth, so deciding on your next move sooner than later saves you a lot of trouble. but perhaps the perks are better than the blow up later on. who am i to say.

if you do want to recover though, firstly, give yourself some credit. the way you are reacting is because this has kept you alive and safe this long, dont let yourself forget that. you arent ridiculous or pathetic or cowardly or whatever else your brain might be saying you are. you are alive, and you are deciding to grow past your trauma and the responses youve learnt to cope with it and thats fucking huge. dont forget it. now the first thing you want to do is really look at what is making you uncomfortable. something is, but itll take some digging. these survival methods run deep, and tracing back to the root of the issue will take time and a lot of work and so much fucking courage. its not easy, im not going to lie, but you can do it. you are worth the time and the work it takes to get the things you want for yourself. find out whats messing with you and see how you can resolve it, either by discussing it with your friend and letting them support you or just rationalising it with yourself. understand that you are able to keep yourself safe, you just have to figure out what you are afraid of being vulnerable to. youre going to be ok, and for the record, im really proud of you.

obviously to everyone: do whatever the fuck you want to forever. im not here to tell you to change your entire life just because i say you should, even im not that egotistical. im just offering my experiences and observations, its up to you what you do with them.

#ask #cluster b #actually aspd #actually narcissistic #npd #aspd #actually npd #aspd safe #npd safe #cluster b safe #trauma related #trauma response #trauma recovery

[exiledelle]

UNDERTALE YELLOW MERCILESS ROUTE SPOILERS

ive seen a couple people here and there be upset over how the route ends, but i want to give my two cents on why i actually really like it

(btw this is not at all me saying people HAVE to enjoy it, or arent allowed to dislike it, just sharing my own take on it)

if youve clicked the read more im going to assume youve played through the merciless route and seen its ending, or dont care about spoilers for it

otherwise what the heck are you doing here

but basically, what ive seen people get upset over a lot, is the fact that clover kills asgore and flowey instantly, takes the human souls, and then just waltzes out of the underground and beyond the players reach (which is my personal take on why resetting goes back to floweys control, and clover forgetting, instead of to when clover unlocks the save ability, is its not clover or flowey resetting, but us. the player IS a distinctly separate entity in ut/dr after all)

but honestly?? what else COULD have happened?? asgore couldnt handle frisk at level ONE. he didnt stand even a FRACTION of a chance against an lv 20 clover, who might i add, has a giant laser beam, a degree of soul magic not even frisk obtains. you COULD argue chara uses soul magic to "kill" our save file at the end of undertales merciless route though, i could see that, but still, clovers laser is a much more direct and obvious show of it. (and just to be safe, before anyone tries to say humans dont have magic, no, thats literally the entire premise of the setting is humans used magic to create the barrier, its just less present in humans than it is in monsters, who are made of the stuff)

and undertale yellows merciless route goes the route of deciding that undertales version already said everything there is to say on the meta aspects and the whole "you can so you need to" mindset, so instead it just calls it what it is: its a power trip. its mindless slaughter for the sake of getting stronger, whether its the player demanding a different ending (like deltarunes coldhearted route(im not calling it snowgrave, but this is entirely personal preference)), or again just wanting to see whatll happen. but either way its to feel strong.

and what happens at the end of that power trip? youve reached level 20. youve surpassed floweys control. you have as much power as you could ever hope to achieve. so, realistically:

whats stopping you from just killing asgore and leaving.

nothing. so you do.

and it leaves you wondering: was the power trip worth it. was the pain and suffering you caused worth it to get such a blatantly, not just non-canon, but ANTI-CANON ending? (EDIT: and i mean this in a positive way, its the same kind of self-reflection over your actions that undertale pulls, just communicated in a more indirect way)

and it being so anti-canon is part of why its such a haunting ending for me.

there really wasnt any other possible way for it to end. lv 20 itself and the way undertale and deltarune characterize that increase in power, in retrospect it feels obvious that it would be anti-canon in a prequel. monster souls are weaker than human souls, even at lv 1. so against a human whos lv 20, and who got there by constantly persisting and trying over and over to get past whatever obstacle is in front of them, and refuses to give up on their conquest, theres nothing anyone can do, and that alone rips the canon of undertale into shreds.

even SANS realizes theres nothing that can actually stop you, not even him, so the best he can hope for is that he puts up enough of a fight to make the player give up and/or reset, same reason his final attack is a turn that never ends.

and having to face that by helplessly watching clover blast an asgore-shaped hole in the story is TERRIFYING to me, in a way i really love the yellow team for doing. idk if its actually intentional or if im reading too much into it, but either way,

#undertale yellow #undertale yellow spoilers #elle rambles

[sonic-adventure-3]

I accidentally drew the same goddamn pose 3 times lmao. Why is posing legs so hard i always fall back on posing them in the shape of a 4. Also, new freak!! Her name is Jerryjack. More about her + individual images + couple other things below the cut vvv

I don’t think I’ve posted any drawings of her other than her first, but i’ve been drawing rig a lot more like this rather than that first one. More graphic head shape, more upright ears, one eye hidden, mouth hidden by scarf, what have you. I think she looks cooler and is way easier to draw like this, but is a little less sonicy, im sure I’ll find a balance sometime. Rare carrion non-blep, this pose is cool but i did not even try cleaning this up lol.

And jerryjack!! She sucks so bad i love her. They’re Rig’s best friend, known each other since they were kids and learned the trade (killing) under the same mentor. She’s 11 months older than Rig, so she’s about 25ish. She hates consistency, commitment, seriousness, kids, stagnation, compassion, anything boring, and many many other things. She loves anything fun, stirring shit, lying, inflicting blunt force trauma, herself, lockpicking, and money. She’s purely self-interested and does everything she does for funsies. She’s not a part of the postal crew cause she thinks it’s boring and is allergic to commitment but hangs around and ‘helps out’ sometimes. She’s a hitman on her own, and has way more connections through that than rig, occasionally floats jobs her way. Also sometimes places bounties on her when shes mad. Or just cause.

Unlike Jerry, Rig is a very routine and organized person. She wakes up every morning at 6 sharp despite not being a morning person. Miraculously, she and jerry lived together for 2 years and during that time rig ate microwaved oatmeal every single morning and got groceries on tuesdays. All this is to say Rig is very methodical and likes routing and things that are expected. So Jerry lost their shit when rig called them randomly and casually told them that she’s starting a non-euphemistic postal service and also spontaneously took in a couple kids. Naturally, she’s very wary of squabble and carrion, especially the latter. Assassin recognizes assassin, silly recognizes silly, they try to kill each other and then become besties (who still periodically attempt to kill each other). As for squabble, she’s surprisingly fun to interact with, so jerry warms up fairly quick and becomes a truly awful influence on her.

Here’s the first drafts and base. She’s obviously a jackalope but calls herself a hare for some reason. Is part of that reason because i couldn’t think of a pun name other than jack like jackrabbit and ‘jack the jackalope’ sounded a little too stupid for my taste (as if ‘jerryjack’ isn’t stupider)? Ummmmmmm.

Anyway, i decided to nix the asymmetrical antlers cause theres a limit to how much asymmetry i should stuff into a set of characters, carrion’s already got the lopped off ear and etc. the back and tail marking is supposed to emulate ribs

I’m still super duper undecided on jerry’s outfit and colour scheme. Every outfit ive thought up so far feels way too simple or untethered to reality in comparison to the postal crew’s, however i think the postal crew is a bit too complicated (or way too complicated in squabble’s case) and too grounded for sonic, so. Idk what to do abt that. And as for their colour scheme, as seen above her first drafts have the same red and green of the postal crew, but seeing as she doesn’t work with them it’s definitely the better choice to diverge from that. Saturated orange is the most tense and unsettling colour to me so i think it suits her off putting nature, but the white and orange combo reminds me intensely of like. 1960s egg chairs. WAIT and ulala space channel 5. And various stupid tech startup kitchen gadgets. Just generally a combo with a lot of nonthreatening and safe associations rather than the warning sign i want. Idk man i’ll workshop it eventually.

Also, cloak rig. Her previous red coat was stupid. Not sure how much smarter this is but it looks cooler. Still doesn’t usually wear it other than in towns to hide her wings or when it’s cold. Also also this is the same fucking pose again

#Sooooooo sleepy rn #so if anything is incoherent it’s cause i’m so sleepy always and forever #doodles #ocs #oc posting #sonic oc #rig the fox-bat #carrion the cat #jerryjack the hare #super awful at getting stuff out of my head so idk how well i explained them or got across their vibe #i like my ocs so much man. so much #i need to post about them more #my art

[the-s1lly-corner]

TADC X READER REQUESTS + RULES!

a modified list of rules for requesting for TADC! for the most part its the same as the original post, but with some important modifications! The inbox part is especially important as I will likely close and reopen requests several times depending on how many are sent in! While I did have loads of fun doing all the requests last week it was very overwhelming and extremely taxing on my mental and physical health <\3

That said, yahoo, I'm back!! Not sure how active I'll be today (11/4), since I'll be spending a lot of the day drawing and prepping for tonights dinner. But !!!

How to request!

sending in a request is simple! you can go into my inbox and send in the character(s) you want! you can describe what kind of reader you want, as well as put in any scenario you want! If you are unsure on whether or not my requests are open, you can refer to my bio, which i keep up to date with of the request status! What all you can request will be detailed below!

What you can request/What I will write!

Please note that if you send in a request while they are closed it will not be answered**, so its best to hold on to your requests until theyre opened or to find another blog !!

**anything sent in while requests are closed will not be answered even after they were reopened; otherwise there wouldn't. Really be much of a point of the open/close system, yk?

you can request most anything so long as it is not listed in the will not write section! if anything slips by and makes me uncomfortable i will let you know!

romantic, platonic, and familial hcs are all welcome here!

the reader is GN by default, you can request a gender if you want, however due to the style of my writing it wont make much of a difference

you can request anyone from the entire TADC cast (save for bubble and Kaufmo), however i will note that occasionally some characters will be left out of full cast lists due to the admin not having any worthwhile ideas for a character. this is less of a "dont request certain characters/less characters" and more of a "hey this is headsup and this is a case by case thing but overall i do do the entire cast"

readers that are similar to existing characters! just a headsup that if i dont know the character i will rely on a character wiki or a friend who knows about the character! So theres a solid chance I may do a disservice to the character in question, heed this warning (/lh)

im also down for character x character! again if the ship makes me uncomfortable i will let you know so you dont have to wait on a request/can move on to a different blog to answer for you,,, should note I rarely do character x character so quality on these will be especially shotty

What you cant request/What I will not write!

no NSFW or kink related asks, please. this blog is SFW, anything that is NSFW or kink-adjacent will immediately be denied

no yandere. while i do write for jealous partners and readers, full yandere stuff is where i draw the line as i am not personally comfortable with the trope/the romance stuff surrounding it

general no no stuff (ab^se of any kind, active** SH, ect ect)

SH is allowed so long as its about healed wounds rather than the act itself being written

Other!

full fanfics and oneshots

I have the right to deny any request for any reason, be it discomfort or feeling underqualified to write about a certain topic. It is nothing against you, there are some requests I simply may not be able to complete. I urge that you respect that and to not push me to answer a request I have already denied

please do not spam or try to push me to answer your request sooner, i tend to answer requests in the order they have been sent; so while it may look like im answering a bunch of people and ignoring you, it is likely not the case! as well as this, sometimes tumblr eats stuff so sometimes it could also be that and i am unaware that you have requested something

my posts tend to be a short paragraph per character or a list of bullet point hcs, i am not at all confident in my skills of writing actual. fanfics, so uh uh .. yeah

#tadc x reader #the amazing digital circus x reader #digital circus x reader #caine x reader #pomni x reader #jax x reader #ragatha x reader #kinger x reader #zooble x reader #gangle x reader

[arkiwii]

well, since i can't really draw or write Arknights stuff because I'm really charged this month, but the brainrot is still very strong, i decided to do a tierlist of my favorite operators!

explanations below the cut

i don't count alters on this tierlist, when I put a character I consider it's them + their alter version; the choice of if I picked the alter or not for the vignette is only based on aesthetic choices, really. also for comprehensive reasons, i tried to put all the related characters next to each other (like how the abyssal hunters are all next to each other)

My most beloved precious blorbos: this one speaks for itself, honestly. operators i absolutely love, that i think about almost on a daily basis, no minded doodles every so often, writing ideas poping up in my mind, big wall of text about how much i like them, autistic thoughts, you know the kind. i just love them very much, simply. originally, saria and ifrit were in the tier just below, since i considered that since i have silence as my favorite character, i did not need to also put them, but i learnt to love them individually rather than for what they represent to silence

Big smooch on their forehead: characters that i know very well the story of, and that I'm really attached! not to the point of being my all times favorites, but who spoke to me to a personal level, or that i used a lot in early game/still use today. i love to read about them and would love to draw or write more about them! justice knight is here as a honorary member

I think they're neat!: i don't know them that well, but i followed them in events, or did a bit of research about them for a reason or another, or simply one of my friends like them! and i do think they're neat, pretty interesting, not the kind i'd be absolutely attached to but i enjoy seeing them regardless :]

I would like to know more about them: feat Abyssal Hunters, the Nearls and Gavial's crew. they are characters i know a little bit about them or they are related to a character i love, but i got too lazy to read their event and files because it's too complicated, or too long, or whatever. but they are characters i know enough about to know i'll appreciate them! so im interested in knowing more about them

Here goes all the other operators, aka "I don't care or I forgot you exist": well, the tier's name once again speaks for itself. theres a ton of characters in that game, and I can't focus on every of them, especially when i started not that long ago. there's a lot that i genuinely just forget about, some that i know the story but i dont care that much to know more, and a few that i do wish to know more about! but not as much interesting as the tier above, so not my priority

I hate you /pos: (i ran out of colors) annoying ass characters with a shitty personalities but they're fun for the memes and i use them regardless (except tequila cause mlynar exists). not like actual hate, mostly affectionate hate, you know, like how you call your cat "stinky", but you still love your cat regardless. fact, at first i was genuinely uncomfortable with lappland, but then with il siracusano i started to feel better with her

I hate you /neg: characters i despise either for game reason or because their smug aura mocks me. phantom is because fuck him in is2 and his story is ehhh to me. gravel is because this character is seriously uncomfortable, for the love of god can you act normal, and i wouldn't mind her if she wasn't guaranteed with every fast redeploy tag. harmonie and ho'olheyak are just smug bitches. and ethan i just have a hate experience because i dont like using him and his voice + the music playing when he appears makes me so anger

Brother you can just die: Silverash tier. fuck you silverash. i don't like his face, i dont like using him, and i did not followed break the ice but i heard enough bullshit about him to know he's a terrible person. i hope i never roll him

#this is subjective as a reminder #not a gameplay tierlist or objective #i dont know every character! #so if you like a character i dont like #or that you dislike a character i like #then do whatever you want! its up to you! i dont care! they're characters! #anyway just wanted to share this cause its fun to know more about me #i think #arknights #parvis goes in the “brother you can just die” tier

[mcsm-confessions]

i love s2 with all my heart, sometimes i find it more fun than s1.. but i think a lot of the writing has flaws! i dont think a lot of the characters are. similar to how they were in s1

i know theres a big time period which leaves room for a lot of change, but they just dont feel like the same characters at all

i mean olivia, not only did she get a new voice actor who doesnt even REMOTELY sound like her old one, she isn't. sarcastic anymore. she was sarcastic, but still a nice person and i really liked that about her character putting her as like my 3rd favorite but now shes just. a whole different character in s2. it feels like they just added a new character with the same name

petra DO NOT GET ME WRONG HERE I LOVE PETRA. (its to the point where i get GENUINELY mad over seeing someone choose options not saving her. im not normal) and i LOVED LOVED LOVEDD her character in s2 a lot, i just feel like a lot of stuff she. wouldnt do. the part where she kept dogging on lukas and radar for being too "weak" for the challenge, when she literally went through the portal arc with lukas, and while the blaze rods were dissing him she defended him with "lukas is ten times the hero you are!" it just felt really out of character to me

i also wish more characters had a spotlight.. i get that they couldnt add as many because of budget reasons, but its still disappointing that axel, olivia, and og order(minus ivor) were only relevant for FOUR episodes.. in season one..

~~~

#mcsm #mcsm confessions #minecraft story mode #mcsm criticism #< new tag #mcsm petra neg

[strawberrybabydog]

What happened to Bailey?

turned into a werewolf and never came back. that full moon always gets the newbies

is anyone going to ask me about my beautiful wonderful girlfriend or am i just going to have to tell yall myself that i have been in love with her for almost the majority of my life and my most special memories were made with her. her cat is awesome too he's the exact same age as my cat and we ship them yaoi style she even made us shirts a long time ago with them on it. once she gave me a birthday card that said happy birthday grandson and it has instructions to turn the card into an oragami car. i have a bag of dried slime that we made together drunk off expired strawberry bailey's at 3am when we were 16. we met on the game i literally work for and have been married in-game since 2015 (our marriage is so old the game cannot display it properly on our profiles. she quit playing long before me but not the point.) she was the person who introduced me to pixel art and told me where to download my first pixel art program, paint dot net, which i still have and use occassionally. in 2018 or 2019 i opened a blog specifically for her because she doesnt have tumblr but i wanted to send her stuff anyways so i just made an entire website about it and even found a cute mushroom theme code for her because she likes nature aesthetics. when i went out into public with my pawsthetic gear, who do you think was with me? who do you think took those pictures? i was terrified to go out in public with my gear so she wore ny other tail, and i said, "what if people yell furry at you, or bark at you?" she said "i dont care. i'll bark back." she isnt alterhuman but she is one of us.

here are some of her pics from that day. it was 2018, the tpose was still funny back then, okay?? ugh, look at me, just a little puppy my hood isnt even pierced yet!! 🥹

i dont know how to tell you guys this but like. i am a person lol. i have memories and special moments just like you that you have no idea about. my life is just as complicated as yours and theres a fuck ton you dont know about me. theres a lot that i dont share on this blog and theres a reason for that

also im just putting this out there but relationships are not black and white. date whoever you want. fuck whoever you want. language and identity labels are meant to propel us NOT hold us back to One Standard. relationships are unique to the people in them. the only wrong way to have a relationship is if you're abusing or traumatizing someone, all of the other boundaries are up to you. in closing, do whatever you want forever

#sorry yall i dont really want to talk about him and honestly idk why some of u seem to think ur entitled to info abt my relationships #this specifc ask is fine i dont care like anon here is just asking and its my choice to reply obviously. anon has no ill intent here. #but like going foreward i dont want to answer 10000 questions about him this blog is meant to be for me and thats what i want to talk about #asks #not dog #personal #ik im a schizo psycho shitter but i still have a life and lots of joy

[yogurt200]

wats ur usual process for writing vn?

i'm only on my 3rd time writing a vn so i wouldnt say i have a solid process yet but ill share the general process writing both heartlovepowertemple and special girls story (precious theatre was collaborative so a lot of this doesnt apply but theres similarities)

the first thing i have is character names and setting.. then the title and chapter titles come along, with the chapter titles i come up with a really vague and rough outline of the whole story, with 1 major event per chapter from start to finish

then i just work with making one chapter at a time (like each chapter has a writing & art phase on its own and i work in order)

recently i write a rough script for the whole chapter on my alphasmart word processor lawl.. i transcribe it all into my pc and then later put it into the renpy files with paintings and stuff but with hlpt i just would write all the dialogue straight to the file one scene at a time.. i dont have very clear ideas of every single thing so for both cases i just write how i feel the characters react in the moment to vague scenarios .. i have a lot more about my script but since i wrote about this recently on my patreon i have to hold back here~sorry

i always write everything according to the minimal timeline of events i came up with in the beginning of development, like its a very rigid structure tht doesnt change

the bones of the story is already all decided from beginning, and the actual meat and stuff i just come up with as i go, i try to be really free about it and impulse cuz like with paintings thats how i get the results that make me happiest (personal preference).. i write for very personal reasons & i go as far as i can into my fantasy world so anything that i feel in my guts is the best stuff for the writing to me, its very free process and i try not to overthink anything

also i think part of the process is when i write vn scripts i like to pretend im the character, so its like a little bit of roleplay with myself :3 ..

#answer

[medievildead]

for the ship opinion bingo kratos/heimdall 👉👈

HOOOO BOY SORRY THIS TURNED INTO A RANT however you did ask for my opinion and this is my blog so you know what. I am gonna post it. And this will be the only time I talk about it.

I reeeeeally don't like kradall it creeps me out and I don't understand it at fucking all. I see people try to make Hear Me Out posts about them and AUs about them and it just makes less and less sense to me (and I KNOW this is bold ass words coming from me I KNOW) but the canon dynamic that does exist for them at no point to me ever at all in the slightest tipped me off or made me think to ship them. Never clicked.

Then again you gotta remember that I'm someone who has been autistic about Kratos since 2005 and I am so incredibly damn picky about shipping him unironically with anyone. Shipping Kratos with Heimdall knowing the kind of person Kratos is and what hes gone through to Become his new self in the norse saga just doesn't make sense. A lot of kradall I see (that isn't non/con honestly another huge reason I don't vibe with it is that a bunch of people use it as a bolt for r/pe stuff in the early moments of Ragnarok fandom) is just them in a very ooc marriage situation I can't wrap my head around. Throwing Kratos into a heavy intense relationship is dumb to me like it took him centuries to fucking get over Lysandra and then moving on to Faye and I'm expected to belive the Hear Me Out posts about why Kratos would be in a long term relationship with.... Heimdall? The guy who is a complete prick to giants? Who actively said misogynistic shit about Atreus' mom who Kratos still loves with his whole heart? And threatened to actively kill his 14 year old son? Kratos's son? Kratos who has lifelong trauma about his child dying from war? I'm not buying it im sorry. No way you cook it will convince me.

In the early points of the ships existence honestly felt to me like people who were into Heimdall just wanted to explore a crutch for brat breaking. But its just genuinley not something I'm into. I'm a firm believer of ship and let ship as long as its harmless and for the most part it is! It's people having fun but it's not for me and never, ever ever will be no matter what and there is a reason I don't talk about it on this blog.

I've been in this fandom a long time and let me say Kratos x Heimdall reminds me a lot of when GoW3 came out and people started shipping and writing tons of Kratos x Hermes dubcon stuff for the sole reason of yaoi fujoshi people wanted to fetishize the gay male power dynamic. Its like I honestly feel some people see a big muscular man and a smaller effeminate man and are like "oh I need to make one a submissive girl" like again I know its just words and pictures on a screen but I have been here long enough to be Very Tired of seeing my sexuality get used as a fetish tool sjshskdnks

And. And ill be honest. And this is petty and trust me this is literally just me and my opinion but I cannot fucking stress how utterly confused and flabbergasted because FREYR IS RIGHT FUCKING THERE. HE IS RIGHT FUCKING THERE. BLATANTLY INTO KRATOS, A COMPLETE KIND SWEETHEART FULL OF LOVE, EXACTLY THE KIND OF GUY THAT WOULD SHOW KRATOS A GOOD TIME AND HAS AN ADORABLE ONSCREEN DYNAMIC THAT DOESN'T EVEN NEED TO BE AU'd OR CHANGED TO MAKE SENSE AND THIS FANDOM DOES NOTHING WITH IT. I see so many AUs where Heimdall survives to get with Kratos and valid but you know what??? I am gonna be angry, WHERE ARE MY FREYR LIVES AUs. WHERE ARE MY AUs WHERE FREYR LIVES AND GETS KRATOS ASCENDED ON THAT VANAHEIM ZA???????

LIKE FORREAL. I honestly feel like this fandom gets so blindsided by Heimdall and wanting to put him in situations and hell I'm guilty of it too, but I have genuinley met GoW Heimdall likers that straight up forgot Freyr existed and it shocks me. I don't get it!!!!!!

Theres a reason I ship Heimdall x Hermes together and its because their individual dynamics are so unbelievably compatible and I like to explore that. But I get people wanting something more realistic in universe as a muse. When it does come to shipping Heimdall with someone else in canon that makes absolute dynamic sense to me, I gotta be honest, Heimdall x Gná is the only "heimdall gets a dom" pairing that I can realistically get behind. Since they both would actually like each other despite being hated by all their peers for their devotion to Odin. Is it healthy? No, but Kradall isn't exactly peaches and cream either. So we work with what we got babey!!!!

#god of war #kratos gow #heimdall gow #freyr gow #gna gow #gna #freyr #kratos #heimdall #god of war ragnarok #gow #gowr

[bunnybeeofficial]

SOOOO totally happy 2 b here!!! im soooo happy 2 meet u all

do u want 2 b happy?

do u want 2 b beautiful??

do u want 2 b mine???

((RULES AND OOC UNDER THE READMORE))

((another blog by me, bunny, the person who came out of nowhere swinging SEMI-LUKEWARM

CAUTION, TRIGGERS AHEAD, NOT ALL WILL BE TAGGED

honey will randomly blip out of existence with my motivation and energy levels! This does NOT mean that she wouldn't be communicating with your OCs during this time. I know it sucks to pilot an npc but please don't just assume honey is ignoring your oc, i seriously do not have the spoons to be as actively extroverted as her. i am an introvert.

theres going to be So much eyestrain on this blog, like to the point that almost every post would have an eyestrain tag, so please keep that in mind!

gifs are tagged "gif" queue tag is "supes cute" food stuff is "yummy stuff" nails are "perfectly painted" art tag is "artsy shit" selfie tag is "super cute selfie" makeup is "looks that kill" clothes are under "wardrobe"

my name is bunny, im 25+, i am not a social person and do not have the energy to talk to a lot of people at once, so either have patience or don't bother

i have several other blogs im not active on, but im most frequently on jujulebee

do not send me IMs in character, i will accept them as ooc if you don't have my discord, otherwise dont

do not leave Replies on my posts, i have stated this multiple times, i don't notice them in the deluge of activity notifications i receive, if you want to have a conversation on a post i have made reblog the post

youre free to ask for my discord but i dont guarantee that ill talk to you regularly, i am not a talkative person

im not Extremely picky with who i follow and will block freely and without hesitation. im here to curate my ideal experience, not save the feelings of a stranger. 

while i understand that ic=/=ooc if your character is transphobic or racist in any way please dont interact, actually

honey wouldn’t want to talk to you anyway

this page does not accept magic anons

please do not godmod to try and fix honeys issues, i dont want that, genuinely

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

honey b azrael was born august 6th, 1998

she’s bi-racial korean, born in texas

she is 4'8" (her boots typically put her at 5’), approx 240 lbs

honey was embraced on january 23rd of 2021

honey's a well-known streamer/virtual idol with a truly Cultish following with a majority of her followers worshipping her akin to a god. she is obssessed with the idea of making people beautiful, with no real concept of what that Beauty is, as she believes beauty is in the eye of the one presenting that beauty, as such she would not change someone without their explicit permission. she loves to be worshipped and idolized, but denying her that adoration does nothing to dissuade her bright personality, there is nothing you can say to convince her she is not worthy of it.

honey is a 6th generation tzimisce, her adoptive sire is delilah and true sire was killed to prevent any complications

⚠️WIP⚠️Strength: 3/5 Dexterity: 2/5 Stamina: 3/5 Charisma: 4/5 Manipulation: 2/5 Composure: 3/5 Intelligence: 2/5 Wits: 2/5 Resolve: 1/5⚠️

honey is a party girl and there will be mentions of drug/alcohol use and i will tag them as “drug mention” or “alcohol mention” if mentioned

nsfw content will be tagged as “nsfw //” or “nsfw language”

⚠️EYES, CULT-LIKE BEHAVIOR, BLOOD, AND BODY HORROR WILL NOT BE TAGGED⚠️

honey is pansexual and disinterested in a romantic relationship but sexually available

honey is doing GREAT and you should trust her

honeys best friend circle consists of dolls, sam, jules, her owl butler hubert, and diana who lives inside of her

she loves making friends and talking to people, though, so feel free to shoot her a message! she WILL talk to you

if your character is rude or just generally mean for no real reason (there are funny exceptions to this rule) honey will not want to speak with you and will probably unfollow you

ooc follows are fine, if i dont interact with your character much ill probably end up unfollowing, though

will add more if i can think of anything

#super cute selfie #gif #artsy shit

[bismuthburnsblue]

ok so!!! i revisited my work from yesterday, going in and properly blocking out the style lines and strap (still up for change as i get into better fabrics but this is a lot more representative of what they would actually look like now!) (though i am noticing ive set my hemline lower- even extending it on nora, when anne's is quite high, so ill have to see how comfortable i feel with that)

i also took a bit out of the hips on the ally pattern which definitely helped with the shape (i was really just being lazy not doing this, ive used this pattern before and had to do that, i knew it was gonna be an issue)

Theres more notes on my personal thoughts on both patterns below the cut :)

same cw's as before for body image stuff :) (maybe this is silly but i just feel far more comfortable putting warnings + a readmore for corsetry)

(also! i will be doing a post properly introducing this project soon :) ive got a lot i want to say!!)

First up! both of these patterns are by Aranea Black, pdfs of these patterns are still available online but her website is gone now)

Ally is a 6 panel corset with extreme hip spring- heres what the pattern looks like:

i do think the hip spring gives a really dramatic shape, but i do worry that with my upholstery weight faux leather, it just wont sit nicely. on this mock up i had to slit my entire seam allowance at the waist to make it not tuck too badly, and that means cutting my boning channel in half (i think, still deciding details like that) i cant really afford to waste fabric recutting panels if i sew it and it does tuck, either.

(Technically i do have the option available to me to do a twin stitch like Anne's original corset actually has, but this wouldnt be traditional, and wasnt in my plan (even if i wasnt gonna have the bones in the leather layer, i like the /look/ of felled channels on the outside.) a twin stitch however would probably negate most the tucking on the waist point, as it opens it up rather than folding to one side.)

Secondly, the one gripe i have about this pattern is that big line of wrinkles below the waist- now some of this will be from the fabric and it not being worn in, but the "daily wear" version of this corset ive made before still has some of these wrinkles even now, especially over the first hip spring panel. i know theres ways to adjust the fitting to counter the ones over the hip, but those i think are largely from the way the fabrics pulling around the curve- its covers such a large area its bound to pull a little weird in places. I really want a smooth look, a clean finish is the most important thing to me, and i worry no matter what i do they will still be there.

I will say, Ally has a lacing gap designed into the pattern, which is something i want, as Anne's corset has one, and it automatically gives you more leeway in the fit that patterns without it just dont have.

Nora on the other hand is 8 panels, with the hip spring spread across a much further space. On paper it looks much less dramatic, but theoretically should still hold a significant amount of shape, just distributed over more panels.

I guess that would be my first area of concern, that the shape just isnt quite as dramatic as the shape on Ally. i really want something quite striking for this project and though pattern modifications can be made, i was hoping to not have to do too much past simples changes.

The 8 panels also means this pattern will likely eat up more fabric. if nothing else, theres 4 extra sides of seam allowance that the other does not have (though, these pieces will nest together better, so it could end up being negligible) it is a concern however, as im working on a very tight yardage.

One of the immediate positives of this pattern however is the lack of that wrinkle band like Ally has. Since this is worn as an outer layer thats a huge point in its favour, a nice clean finish is basically the top of my requirements list.

Nora also has no lacing gap, which is an issue for the reasons mentioned above (annes costume has a lacing gap, but also lacing gaps give more leeway in the fit, allowing you to be a little tighter on some days than others.) Its possible to draft in a lacing gap relatively easily, but it is something i have to consider.

Its completely arbitrary, but i also feel like the way the strap joined onto this pattern was nicer- it lined up better with the pre existing panels and i think it'd join on as a continuous piece better. again, its extremely minor, i just think its cleaner with less fiddling on my end.

I think im still thinking the same way i was yesterday, that Nora is probably the pattern thats working better for me for this, but its still very up in the air for me. i feel like theres more pattern modifications to do there, but that its probably going to be worth doing the work? but i am definitely interested in what anyone else might think!

#hA sorry for the vibes of the yesterday post i was frustrated w some stuff and not achieving as much as i wanted #and fitting is always. a Task for me #anyway! here is your usual obnoxiously long post i bet you really missed this :) #i would apologise but. no. sewing talk makes me happy so! #but if u read it all. kisses and then i am very interested in input #anne bonny cosplay #also lol i was testing some shit w the top visual wise pls ignore that mess actually