#the dialogue and exposition is throwing me off

[savage-rhi]

Immortal Shield Chapter 34: Gods Bane I

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Tagging: @seradyn​

The week had come and gone too quickly for Ardyn. As powerful as he was, he couldn’t bend time to his will and stop it no matter how hard he wished. The early hour of dawn had arrived. Ardyn looked out the large window of the hotel room of the Via, blinking a few times. He needed a break finishing up the letter he had been preparing for Caelan. Memories of the past week and hesitations arouse inside himself.

After the night of the concert, they ventured to the other districts. Caelan got to show Ardyn where she used to live before Insomnia’s fall. It was a bittersweet situation for her. Ardyn recalled Caelan being on the verge of tears seeing that her old home had been converted from a glorious apartment complex for the guard, to another realm of small businesses. The Pax district and its small town aesthetic were long gone, now part of the larger metropolitan area. That was the final nail in the coffin when it came to determining if Caelan could continue to call the city her true home. As much as she loved Insomnia, and seemed to adore the changes, it was clear to Ardyn that she didn’t belong in this newer world. Caelan had told him as much when they departed.

"I'm sure it was beautiful," Ardyn remarked, resting a hand upon Caelan's shoulder. "I don't believe you'd lie about such things, if you're worried about my opinion."

"Is this how you felt seeing your home become a city after thousands of years?" Caelan furrowed her brows, looking down to her feet while she tried to compose herself. She didn't think it would be this hard to let go, yet here she was. Feeling like a sinking ship.

"Felt like what?" Ardyn tilted his head curiously.

"Like you're obsolete?"

Ardyn's glanced over Caelan while he contemplated her words. He hadn't thought of this in a long time. A deep sigh left him while he nodded.

"Yes," Ardyn murmured. "It was quite jarring initially, but you know how I got over it?"

"Hm?" Caelan raised her head, tilting a brow.

"By drinking wine and filling up on sweets."

Smiles and grins paved way to laughs that were shared between the both of them at Ardyn's comment. Not long after, Ardyn took hold of Caelan's hand, and guided them away from the area.

"Where are you taking me now?" Caelan laughed.

"We're getting orange cakes and wine. I wasn't joking! It's the best cure for melancholy."

"You're going to turn me into an obese alcoholic at this rate." Caelan scoffed.

"I'll still adore you regardless."

The corner of Ardyn’s lips formed into a smile while he remembered cheering Caelan up. After their bakery trip, they messed with a few crownsguard while snooping for more information regarding the king, and then took a trip to Insomnia's newly opened natural history museum. The visit had been a highlight for Ardyn, yet he also received a taste of what Caelan endured at Pax.

“Ardyn?” Caelan realized her partner wasn't near while venturing off to the fossil exhibit. She turned around and searched for him among the visitors. It didn’t take long before Caelan backtracked and found Ardyn staring at the paintings in the fine art section.

“I thought I lost you for a moment,” Caelan smiled while she approached him, catching her breath in the process. He didn’t acknowledge her. His gaze was too transfixed on the artwork before himself.

Caelan made a face, doing a double take between him and the art before she settled her eyes on the painting. The piece had been restored, and there were tell tale signs that someone tried destroying the art centuries ago. The image was of none other than the man standing beside her. One arm out, while the other remained on the head of someone who was infected with the scourge. A ring of light surrounded the top of Ardyn’s head. His white robes and long red hair flowed into the background, surrounded by crowds of adoring people, a black chocobo at his side. Caelan stepped closer so she could read the plaque underneath.

“The Founder King & Healer of Lucis. Circa unknown,” Caelan said aloud. She turned her head to check Ardyn before proceeding to read the rest. “Many artifacts related to Ardyn Lucis Caelum have been lost to time or destroyed. This painting was found in the deeper recesses of Angelgard during the formation of Angelus Vitae. The image has been carefully restored by over 100 talented artists within Insomnia, and paid for by King Noctis. Ardyn Lucis Caelum’s legacy is one of mixed truths. He was well known as the Accursed Adagium and a modern Chancellor of Niflheim before his status as Founder King was reinstated. While he has gravely impacted Eos, many modern Lucian bloodlines wouldn’t exist without Ardyn’s sacrifice by taking the starscourge unto himself over 2,000 years ago. It is with hope from King Noctis, that more artifacts will be unearthed to honor his ancestor.”

Caelan’s voice trailed off. The heavy feeling in her chest was indescribable. She could only imagine what was going on through Ardyn’s head. Before Caelan could approach him, Ardyn already had moved close to her side. He slid his left hand down to meet her right, his calloused fingertips giving hers as a squeeze. She turned her head to the right, focusing on him while Ardyn continued to look over the painting.

“The royal artisans could never get my nose correct in these dreary portraits.” Ardyn smiled faintly. It grew more when he saw Caelan try in vain to suppress a laugh but failed.

“Of all the comments you could make, that was quite a surprise.”

“Were you expecting something much more…profound?”

Caelan nodded.

“I don’t know what to make of such dedications.” Ardyn said truthfully. He sighed while his eyes carded over the little details. Taking them in for a final time before he’d allow himself to proceed with the rest of the tour.

“I’m feeling rather existential.”

“Hey,” Caelan’s hand squeezed his. Her soft voice allured him out of his thoughts while Ardyn looked at her.

“You have every right to here. In this time, and with me.”

Her reassurance was enough to quell the darker thoughts Ardyn had about his life. He couldn’t help but reward Caelan with an embrace. His head resting against hers while he closed his eyes and allowed the calm to settle in his heart. She had become his anchor, and cherished it beyond all else.

“Come. Let’s see if I’m older than the fossils here.” Still taking her by the hand, Ardyn chuckled while Caelan laughed as they ran away from the painting and to the next exhibit.

As the memory left Ardyn in the present, he chuckled. His head shaking almost in disbelief that so much good had been graced to him. He swallowed, letting out a breath then finished off the last of his words and carefully folded the letter up. Traveling out of the living room area, Ardyn arrived in the bedroom. Caelan remained asleep. Her body consumed by the blankets. He could smell the wine they had been drinking from the night prior becoming stale in their glass cups near the foot of the bed on top of a small table. As Ardyn ventured close, he stood by Caelan’s side and stretched across the bed without putting his weight on her, resting the letter on top of his pillow. Letting out a sigh as he regained his composure, Ardyn bent down on his knees so he was eye level with Caelan’s sleeping form.

While Ardyn’s fingertips rummaged softly through her hair, eyes drinking in her features, his whole body screamed at him to remain. To not proceed with what he planned. Yet his heart won over logic. Ardyn was beyond afraid of losing her like he lost Aera. Knowing the Astrals and their conniving ways, Ardyn knew Caelan could easily be cast off as a sacrifice for the greater good. He wasn’t going to risk it. Even if it cost him everything and his place at her side in this life.

“Forgive me, Cahl.” Ardyn pleaded. He pressed a long kiss to her lips then murmured against her skin. “I love you, sweet girl.”

Before he could be tempted by her warmth and the soft noises that escaped her, Ardyn fled. As soon as he closed the door behind him to their room, Ardyn braced himself. He put his hat on, tilting the brim up. His resolve grew with each passing step. He was ready to facedown fate for a second time. No more running away.

The Insomnian Public Forum is now open on this day at 10:00am. If you have concerns that should be addressed to the king and his courts, please make your way through the primary hall and to the throne room of the citadel. His majesty King Noctis will be present, and will not be actively engaging with the public save for his officials and retainers. The Forum will be open until 12:00pm and not a minute longer. Thank you!

The speakers throughout the grand halls of the palace echoed with the booming voice of the announcer. Ardyn grimaced. Whoever was in charge of sound proof should’ve been fired on the spot as far as he was concerned. The quality wouldn’t have stood if this was taking place at Zegnatus Keep. A slight smirk was expressed on Ardyn’s face at the thought.

“It’s so easy to slip back into chancellor duties,” Ardyn murmured to himself. He lowered his hat some while he drifted past officials and public folk. Without having to separate his magic between himself and Caelan, he was able to channel far more details to make his disguise fool proof to anyone that ventured too close to have a look upon his face. This also guaranteed it wouldn’t fade too soon unlike their little fiasco at the Vote Abandon concert.

While Ardyn followed the crowd like a wolf blending in with a herd of sheep, he took his time admiring the interior of the palace. Everything was more or less the same before he, the daemons, and his final battle with Noctis ransacked the place. The elevator lobby, reception, and primary halls hadn’t been touched. The directions to the audience chamber, press room, and crystal room were strikingly different nonetheless. When the crowd made a left versus a usual right, Ardyn furrowed his brows. Confusion ever present, but he decided to trust the group. He feared if he drifted away and didn’t appear he looked like he knew where he was going, someone would catch onto him.

Ardyn recalled his ten years of living at the citadel while he awaited the return of Noctis. He had spent so much time in these halls, getting acquainted with them for their final battle, that everything felt second nature navigating the grounds. It was also quite lonely. Save for daemons that would sneak their way in, there was not a soul to keep Ardyn company while he patiently waited for his death to arrive. He didn’t miss those years. It made his anxieties and impatience foreboding. So much so that if any living thing managed to get through the city and make it to him, Ardyn couldn’t be bothered with keeping them alive for long. He himself slept for four of those years in a dreamless dark, sitting on a throne that would never be his.

Several minutes later, the grand doors leading to the throne room opened up and Ardyn stepped through along with the several hundred citizens that wanted to express their opinions, woes, and tidings. The chattering grew, much to Ardyn’s irritation. In his opinion, having such discussions at this hour of the morning was counterproductive. Ardyn recalled he performed his duties as chancellor in the afternoons when he was well rested. For all the time he had observed Noctis lazily lounge with his friends prior to their final battle, Ardyn was surprised the boy developed a taste for the early life. He expected the late king Regis had something to do with that. The old man was quite a morning bird himself when he was alive.

The inside of the throne room was the same as his visions. Ardyn swallowed as he eyed certain details that he witnessed in his dreams. It was a final confirmation that his night terrors were not just byproducts of his personal problems, nor his primal instinct to fear the unknown. Everything was leading to this moment. Ardyn could feel it down to his very bones. The heaviness of his burdens were further amplified when he saw a few of Noctis’s retainers from afar. Ignis, and Gladio respectively. There was a brief temptation on Caelan’s behalf to approach Gladio and knock his skull in, but Ardyn knew under these circumstances, he couldn’t sate the desire.

Ardyn mingled with the common folk while he’d cast a glance from time to time their way, watching the boys talk to fellow crownsguard and planning his majesty’s entrance. His heartbeat started to quicken as a few minutes became ten, and ten became twenty.

What’s taking so long? Ardyn thought bitterly to himself. As much as he appreciated his time getting acquainted with the new layout of the throne room and its many exits, along with discussing troubling matters like chocobos venturing out into the city streets, everything was becoming a nuisance. Ardyn wanted to get this over with. His mind triggered from the ten years he dwelled here didn’t help when it came to patience. There was also a stirring Ardyn could feel leaking through. The scourge tapping his shoulder, letting him know it wanted to come out. The twisted feeling in his stomach was a huge indicator that he had not only a physical battle to brace himself for, but an inner one, and worst of all Ardyn didn’t have an anchor to keep him grounded.

Maybe leaving Caelan behind to do this alone was a bad idea.

He had to learn to live with the regret.

“Ladies and gentlemen, his majesty King Noctis awaits with greetings for the people of Insomnia!” An announcer close by to Ignis proclaimed.

“Please cease discussions as we pay respects to our current king. Forum proceedings will continue momentarily.”

Ardyn’s fists clenched. Sweat trickled down his forehead. He couldn’t recall a time in his life he had been so nervous before. His eyes slightly widened more as he zeroed in on the entryway where Noctis was to come forth. This was it. The beginning of the end.

Caelan awoke around 10:30. She got up and stretched, rubbing her eyes and moved about the bedroom before making her way to the kitchen. Her throat and tongue were dry, having drank too much wine and not bothering to keep up with hydration. A slight groan escaped Caelan while she rubbed her forehead and made her way to the kitchen sink. She filled a glass of water up and drank generously. Luckily there were no signs of a hangover at present.

“Don’t need that again anytime soon,” Caelan muttered to herself, recalling the morning after at Lestallum. As much as she had an amazing time with Ardyn back then, Caelan could do without the throbbing pain of a hangover. Luckily last night, they were too caught up in their passions for one another to get drunk. They both agreed arriving at the forum intoxicated would be in poor taste and also jeopardize their mission. Caelan reminded herself they would depart around 11am, and arrive by 11:30. The king would be present around that time to mingle if he wished.

The silence in the hotel room stirred Caelan more awake as she thought of Ardyn. Her right hand felt across her left collarbone and shoulder. A slight wince fell past her mouth at the bites and various hickies he left. She smiled big.

“Ardyn!” Caelan called out playfully. Her mind was conjuring ways to get him back, and entice him. She ventured through the kitchen and to the large living room, her eyes casting glances everywhere from the couch, to the various chairs available at their disposal. There was no sign of him. He wasn’t in the bathroom either after she combed through the large space.

“Ardyn?” Caelan’s steps started to pick up in speed while she checked out a secondary room that was part of their amenities. Like before, no sign.

“Ardyn?” Grave concern was in her tone as Caelan raised her voice. Her heart began to pound deeply in her chest. There were times throughout the week where Ardyn would go off by his lonesome, usually to the top of the Via to enjoy the last of the night before the sun would rise upon Insomnia. It was either that or he’d venture to one of the restaurants nearby to pick them both up something to eat for later, but there was something terribly wrong about this situation. Caelan knew she had no evidence, but on an instinctual level, there was something amiss.

Caelan ran back to the room and started to change into her clothes. In between throwing on her pants, shirt, and gear, she checked her phone after plucking it from the charger on her side of the bed. There were no texts from him.

“Ardyn...” Caelan breathed out and swallowed. The bounce she made on the mattress involuntarily as she rose caused her to catch something from the corner of her eye. Caelan did a double take, before settling her gaze on Ardyn’s side of the bed. There was a folded note on top of his pillow. She was quick to snatch it up from the spot, unfolding it and her eyes scanned over its contents:

Love,

I didn’t wish to wake you while you slept so soundly.

I decided to see the king by myself, without you accompanying. I understand this is not what we agreed upon, and your wrath towards me is well justified. I’m going to ensure your freedom and safety for all days to come.

I will return to you within the night. No tricks. I swear it. I will follow through with what we planned, and we will leave the city together.

Lie low in our room until I come back. Don’t leave unless you are in danger, and don’t set foot outside of Insomnia unless I send word. My bank account is at your disposal. Treat yourself to any amenities at the Via. Consider it one of many acts of apology I will perform.

Trust me. I will return to you.

Ardyn

“Son of a bitch!” Caelan hissed between her gritted teeth. She didn’t waste time, sprinting off the bed and rushing to the door. Caelan ran so fast, that upon exiting the room she slammed her body into the left side of the hallway. Getting her bearings in a matter of seconds, Caelan panted while her legs took off once more.

There was a part of Caelan that was angry beyond recognition at the stunt Ardyn had pulled behind her back, yet she understood all too well why he made a huge decision on her behalf. He was scared. The constant reassurances throughout the letter were telling Ardyn was terrified, and gods forbid, he was uncertain he would make it out alive. Caelan couldn’t confirm for sure until she confronted Ardyn, but her gut told her as much.

Caelan's instincts to protect him ran amok in her mind while making her way through several floors, and eventually out of the Via. Ardyn was alone. He had no back up, and she needed to get to him. At least follow through with keeping the guards preoccupied while he dealt with Noctis.

“I’m gonna kill him myself if the king doesn't!” Caelan said to herself while she headed to the garage keep where Ardyn had the Scepter dropped off. The rage at being deceived hit her hard especially with how their relationship blossomed during the past few weeks. Caelan had a list of demands for Ardyn to work on regarding himself if they lived through this.

As Caelan saw the Scepter in her sights, she suddenly came to a halt. In front of her car were several crownsguard. Around fifteen give or take.

“Shit,” Caelan murmured aloud, and turned around to back track. More showed up. As soon as she made eye contact with one of the guard, they immediately went on the alert drawing out their weapons. Caelan on instinct summoned her blade, and took on a defensive pose.

“Wait!” A familiar voice drew from the crownsguard, and stepping forth to greet Caelan was none other than Prompto. Her eyes widened. A small gasp escaped Caelan’s throat before she held steady. There were mixed emotions in Prompto’s features from what was observed. Caelan couldn’t help but look over her shoulder to where the Scepter was at. Her eyes closed as she began to beat herself up mentally.

“The car gave me away, didn’t it?” She let out a huff, feeling like a fool for being so open the night of concert with both Prompto and Cindy. Then again, Cindy was the one that told Prompto about the Scepter. Caelan was surprised Prompto hadn’t confronted her nor Ardyn earlier in the week. Given the resources crownsguard had, he could’ve easily tracked her vehicle to the Via.

Prompto sighed, giving a nod before he took a few steps towards Caelan. He gestured for the men and women of the guard to stand down for the time being. To let him handle this.

“Cae, I need you to come with us.” Prompto urged.

“Am I being under arrest?”

“Yes, in a manner of speaking.”

“I'm going to politely decline,” Caelan began. Her eyes carded over each individual man and woman before her, calculating how best she could cut through them all to get to Ardyn. “I have someone waiting for me. I need to protect him.”

“That’s precisely what I need to talk with you about,” Prompto interjected before Caelan could get another word in. “You were with Ardyn that night at the concert.”

“Unless you have me in custody, I’m under no obligation to say shit.”

Prompto furrowed his brows, letting out a exasperated gasp as he growled. “Cae, I’m not approaching you as an enemy. I need to know what Ardyn is doing here for the safety of the king. Please, I want to help you!”

“So you can lock him away or kill him? No. I’m not buying what you’re selling. Let me pass, or get in my way and see what happens.” Caelan made eye contact with several of the guard, making it known she intended to kill if they stepped out of line.

“Has Ardyn experienced any visions?” Prompto raised his voice. “Has he had communion with the Astrals?”

Caelan shuddered at the sudden questions. She was nervous, keeping herself on high alert but also listened intently to Prompto.

“Yes,” Caelan responded. Her voice was cold as her convictions to do whatever was necessary to help Ardyn. “Several, in fact. Why?”

“Lady Lunafreya foresaw something bad happening today. Noctis--the king,” Prompto corrected himself among the guard. He mentally cursed for falling out of line with formalities but continued. “It's like he changed overnight. Cae, if Ardyn is seeking him out, they might kill each other. I need you to come with me to the palace, so we can protect the people we care for.”

“How do I know this isn’t a trick?” Caelan spat. She had one too many run ins with law enforcement to know when she was being set up, and didn’t like how Prompto was appealing to her protective nature.

“I don’t know your story, nor do I understand how the hell Ardyn is back, but when Cindy tells me someone is good, I believe her with all my heart.” Prompto swallowed. He could tell he wasn’t having much luck getting Caelan to trust him and was preparing himself for the worst; though it pained him so.

“I care about my friend, and I can tell you care an awful lot for Ardyn. Otherwise you wouldn’t be so defensive. Let’s call a truce. For the sake of our loved ones, let us help each other!”

Caelan debated with herself. She once more did the math in her head regarding how many crownsguard she could fight. There were now over twenty five. The odds were in her favor if she could avoid getting shot. Yet given the severity of the situation that involved gods, kings, and prophecy, Caelan knew she would be doing both herself and Ardyn a disservice wasting her time on opponents that weren’t even a fraction as powerful as the foes they’d face. She needed to use her energy wisely, and now wasn’t the time for a bloodbath.

"Fine." Caelan sighed in defeat.

Prompto gave a command for the crownsguard to lower their weapons to which they complied, and that gesture was enough for Caelan to yield her sword. She relaxed her shoulders, then carefully walked to Prompto's side. Her hand still gripped the halt of her blade just in case.

Prompto gave Caelan a friendly smile and nod then gestured for her to follow him to his personal vehicle. Several of the crownsguard joined them both to play things safe until they arrived at the car nearby. Prompto cleared his throat and addressed them formally.

“Guard unit G20, report back to the citadel and be on alert if commander Amicita needs assistance. Units 230 and 235, follow behind my car for escort. Our guest will be riding with me.”

“Yes sir.”

“Cae, after you!” Prompto opened up the passenger side of his vehicle, and Caelan ducked into it and closed the door. She watched the blonde sprint over to the drivers side. As soon as he hopped in the vehicle, Prompto was quick to turn the engine on, back up, and hit the main highway going to the palace. His speed was almost 90 mph in a matter of seconds. Caelan braced herself in the passenger's seat, looking at him like he was mad.

“S-sorry! Still breaking her in!” Prompto chuckled, then adjusted his pace. He was now going a few miles above speed limit, while maintaining distance from other cars. As he finished moving from the right lane and into the left so he could move past traffic, Prompto let out a deep breath.

“I know this is sudden, but I need to ask you where Ardyn is.” Prompto furrowed his brows. His voice betrayed his nerves while Caelan turned her head to face him. She could see it. How his grip on the steering wheel tightened and the muscles in his neck flexed. She made a face.

“You’re terrified of him, aren’t you?”

“Y-yeah, kinda. It’s a long story.” Prompto admitted, then shook his head. “Anyway, we shouldn’t get side tracked. Do you know where he is currently?”

Caelan recalled Ardyn explaining to her that he had toyed with Prompto in the past. He didn’t indulge too much of what transpired between them, not comfortable discussing it for the time being, but knowing how Ardyn was before the Dark Decade, Caelan didn’t put it past the man to have downright tortured the poor soul sitting beside her. It didn’t stop Caelan from loving Ardyn nevertheless. They were both very flawed individuals that had hurt people to get ahead in this world.

“We were supposed to go to the public forum. I have no doubt he's there right now.” Caelan began, letting out a deep breath. She hoped against hope she wasn’t making a terrible mistake putting her faith in Cindy’s boyfriend as she continued. “I met Ardyn months ago at Galdin Quay. He hired me to escort him to Insomnia. Ardyn wanted to see the king, and find a solution to end his immortality.”

“Wait, so Ardyn has no clue why he’s back either?” Prompto was surprised, glancing over Caelan before focusing back on the road.

“We’re just as flabbergasted as you guys are. Same with the king and his ailments.” Caelan said bluntly, letting out a sigh.

“Why didn’t you guys come to us sooner?”

“It's a long story and we don’t have time for it.” Caelan huffed, waving Prompto off. “Look, I know Ardyn has blood on his hands and he did wrong by you and everyone. You have to trust me when I say he doesn’t wish to harm the king. Neither do I. Ardyn just wants answers and peace.”

“I really want to believe you,” Prompto began. His brows knitted into a concerned glare. “But I’m also weary. As a retainer, I have to be extra cautious. What’s he to you anyway? What Cindy said back at The Solstice, Ardyn being your fella, that ring any truth?”

Caelan hesitated, and decided to be honest. “I’m his partner and shield. We protect each other.”

"But, he left you behind...”

“He didn’t want to see me get hurt.” Caelan sighed. “Ardyn's an idiot like that.”

Prompto snorted, giving a smirk to Caelan at the admission. He chuckled as she rolled her eyes.

“Tell me about Lady Lunafreya’s vision,” Caelan changed the subject, wanting to confront the more pressing matters at hand. “What prompted you to come looking for me now versus earlier in the week? You could’ve easily confronted us.”

“Hold your horses!” Prompto exclaimed. He was surprised at how rapidly Caelan made her statements. There had been so much that occurred last night and this morning that he was still processing it all. Prompto breathed out.

“Luna said something about daemon and god becoming one, a step under the rising sun. She had us retainers try to convince Noctis to forgo attending the forum last night because of it. He wouldn’t listen, said something about feeling compelled to 'hear the call'. Luna tried this morning to stop Noctis, but he hurt her. It was--hard to watch. The queen is expecting, so everyone has been on edge.”

To say Caelan was shocked by the kings behavior was an understatement. There was also surprise that lingered on her face when she heard the news that the queen was pregnant. It was definitely something that the news stations hadn't picked up on. Caelan couldn’t help but wonder if Noctis and Lunafreya were saving the announcement for a later time.  She decided not to ask Prompto to explain further details regarding Luna. Her mind was too busy trying to rip apart the ‘daemon and god becoming one’ riddle.

“Ardyn heard such weird sayings like Luna,” Caelan began. She looked ahead, watching as city buildings and people passed them by. “Youngblood king walks tall. Shards of crystal, the dragon calls. Heavy heart, young blood falls.”

“Do you know what it means?” Prompto asked curiously.

“Not a damn clue,” Caelan sighed. She recalled the time Ardyn and she had spent at Vesperpool. How he asked Caelan to share her opinions on the matter regarding his visions. “I mentioned to Ardyn it might have something to do with Bahamut.”

“The dragon god of the six?”

“The very same.”

“How did you reach that conclusion?”

Caelan shrugged. “Of all the Astrals, Ardyn hates him the most. Bahamut is the reason he became the Adagium in the first place, and set him off the deep end.”

There were a thousand questions that exploded in Prompto’s mind upon hearing that. He had heard from Noctis the true story of how Ardyn fell, slain by his brother Somnus and was usurped. Bahamut was mentioned wanting to wipe Eos clean, but he couldn't recall anything about Ardyn and the dragon god. Prompto withheld asking anything further of Caelan regarding Ardyn’s visions, and his past, focusing on the present moment and trying not to let his insecurities take hold of the wheel and steer him off course.

“To answer your other question,” Prompto cleared his throat. “I did go looking for you and Ardyn after the concert. I knew you were staying at the Via.”

“Then why did you choose not to engage us?”

“I--I don’t know.” Prompto admitted. He knitted his brows. “I had to make certain that really was Ardyn I saw. Being a retainer to the king, I can’t leave room for errors. I mean if I barged in with the crownsguard on a random civilian and her client, with no reason other than speculation she was harboring someone important, that would ruin my reputation and the kings too for picking an idiot to act on his behalf.”

Prompto chuckled to ease the tension in the car. He paused for a moment, glancing Caelan’s way. The concern and worry in her eyes seemed to grow with each passing second.

“To confirm my suspicions, I saw you guys leave the Via the day after the concert, before Ardyn did that shadowy thing to disguise you both near the garages. You both looked happy.”

“So, you didn’t want to ruin a tender moment is what I'm hearing?”

“Maybe. Did Cindy ever tell you I’m a hopeless romantic?” Prompto grinned.

Caelan couldn’t help but laugh, shaking her head in disbelief. Despite second guessing putting her full confidence in Prompto, she had to admit he was a decent guy. Caelan made a mental note to herself that should anything dire happen at the palace, Prompto needed to be protected just as much as Ardyn. She wouldn’t forgive herself if anything happened to Cindy’s beau. Not when he was someone that had a good head on his shoulders.

Prompto continued to speed through the streets of Insomnia. Both he and Caelan began to discuss how to best approach the dangerous situation awaiting not just them, but the entire city. Whatever was fated to happen, they both felt compelled to try and be a step ahead.

#immortal shield #ardyn lucis caelum #ardyn izunia #ardyn #ffxv ardyn #ffxv #original characters #fanfic #fanfiction #final fantasy xv #i realllllyyyy dont like this chapter #the dialogue and exposition is throwing me off #but imma get the fuck over myself #it is what it is #dun dun daaaaa #bad shit going down

[cannedpickledpeaches]

Insert Your Name (1)

Mafia!Jade Leech x Mafia!Reader

Link to part two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve!

Notes and TW: I wanted to write something that simultaneously includes some fun Jade moments as well as my own thoughts on some tropes. This series will have mentions of blood, violence, crime (kidnapping, attempted assassination, extortion), and harassment, as one might expect from a mafia AU. Please enjoy!

You’ve known the truth for a while—that this world exists inside a story. This is a world that revolves around a nameless, faceless, flawless main character. This entire world around you exists to serve one purpose: to present trials to the main character until she eventually finds a happy ending with her one and only. This world is created for “(Y/N).”

You are Friend A. Friend A is a foolish girl who puts (Y/N) into a dangerous situation, involving her with the mafia. (Y/N) is saved by a tall, dark, and brooding man who turns out to be a mafia boss. They will face dangers in the underworld until all threats are eliminated, and then they will live out the rest of their lives in blissful peace as though they are good people. Friend A is never mentioned again after page two.

You are Friend A. You are aware of that.

So why don’t you break out of your role in this story? Why should you play your part instead of using this knowledge to change the flow of the plot?

Simply because the plot is beneficial to you.

You are Friend A. You are a core member of the Leech Mafia. When (Y/N) enters the mafia, her actions flick the first domino of a long chain of events, eventually leading to the prosperity of the Leech family and expanding their influence. Because no matter what, this story caters to (Y/N)’s livelihood.

And why should you interfere with something that will eventually pay out big for you?

There she is now, coming down the street with a smile. Her indistinct hair is in a messy bun that she always throws together in seconds. Her pants emphasize her incredibly tiny waist, and her eyes sparkle with the light of constellations when she sees you. A light blush dusts her cheeks even though she doesn’t wear makeup, and she passes all the people captivated by her on the sidewalk, oblivious to their stares, because she doesn’t believe in her innate beauty and charisma—the beauty and charisma that the story says she has.

“Oh, there you are!” Her voice, clear and sweet, rings out to you. You wave back, just as you are supposed to. “You said you wanted to get sweets from the bakery that just opened, right? I’m so excited. I love sweets! I saved up some money just for this.”

A dialogue line full of exposition. You nod and lead the way.

“Have you seen their Magicam posts? The cakes are so pretty.”

Her giggles chime like bells. “I think the strawberry one is the cutest!”

Your small talk has little to no substance. It exists only to pass the time. To be honest, you don’t mind. If this were any normal day, you would have enjoyed this. You would have visited that bakery with (Y/N), gone home with a strawberry tart, checked up on the ledgers for the mafia, and slept while fed and content. But today is the inciting incident of the story, and you have your part to play.

A dark alleyway is where these things always take place in stories. Four men smoking and muttering ominously to themselves lean against a brick wall, hidden in shadow. Their eyes follow your every step. You make sure to walk on the outside of the sidewalk so that (Y/N) passes by the alley. As expected, their hands shoot out and grab her arm.

“Hey, you there.” One of the thugs licks his chops. “Got a minute to spare, pretty thing?”

Generic “bad guy” dialogue. Of course, he’s talking to (Y/N). You don’t need to do anything yet except make sure the pieces are in place. A flutter of black fabric in the corner of your vision assures you that the main lead is ready and waiting.

“Get your hands off me!” (Y/N) struggles against his much stronger grip to no avail. The men pull us into the alleyway and corner us against a dumpster. Tasteful.

“Don’t be so harsh.” Another thug whose voice scrapes like glass shards to the ears grabs your shoulder. You don’t shrug him off. Right now, your role is to lay low and let the main character shine. “We just wanna show you a good time.”

“You can fuck right off! And don’t touch my friend.” (Y/N) shows off her generically headstrong personality now. She probably thinks that she should protect you. You are Friend A, without any special characteristics, a piece of cannon fodder that cannot do anything on your own. Even though (Y/N) doesn’t consciously think that way, this is how she perceives the world. She is not wrong for doing so—she’s being sweet, in the way that she is designed to be.

You don’t have anything to do while she shoots off her scathing remarks, so you take your time to observe the thugs. Just as the story you read describes, these men come from an easily identifiable rival mafia. All four have a tattoo of a handsaw on their bodies—the symbol of the Carpenter Mafia, the current major group in the Queendom of Roses. Common soldiers, no doubt. Not anyone of importance . . . yet.

Thug Number One brings your attention back to the conversation by yanking on your hair. It hurts a little. Irritating, but you can bear with it. (Y/N) looks outraged.

“How about this? Since you’re so determined to save your friend, I’ll let her go if you give yourself to us.” He continues with his harassment by grabbing your cheeks with his grimy fingers. You inhale deeply and immediately regret it due to the smell of his breath. Your mind urges you to refrain from giving him a nice fist to the face. Not just from his treatment of you, but also from his gross proposition to (Y/N). Despite your respective roles in this story, she is still your friend. Hearing him throw those slimy words at her leaves a bitter taste in your mouth.

(Y/N) puts up a struggle. “I won’t give you anything!”

“Do you think you’re in a position to make demands?”

She hesitates, looking at you with conflicting emotions warring on her features. Takes a deep breath, just as the story says she would. Then, with a wavering voice and a tough façade, she agrees.

You take your cue to run from the alleyway, abandoning her the way Friend A is meant to do. You don’t have to worry. After all, the thugs won’t be able to do anything before the male lead steps in and saves her.

There isn’t much time to waste until you get an update on the story. You hail a taxi to a neighbourhood by the sea. You tip the driver handsomely, bid him a good day, then walk another block before arriving at a mansion. There’s nobody here to greet you except the security guards at the front gates.

You scan the trees. Looks like he’s in a good mood. When he’s upset, he doesn’t usually climb. He hasn’t noticed you yet—his back is turned, his head buried in a particularly thick patch of leaves, and you’re downwind.

“Floyd!”

He turns so suddenly that you’re worried he’ll get whiplash. A grin lights up his face, and without a single reservation, he jumps right off the tree and lands smoothly on your side of the fence surrounding one of the Leeches' many properties. The sun shines across his handsome, sharp features. Of course, the twin brother of the male lead must be gorgeous in accordance with the axioms that govern this world.

“Handfish, how was it? Did Jade meet her?” Even though you are Friend A in this story, to Floyd, you are just his friend. He hasn’t given you a generic nickname like the “minnows” that he calls the family’s soldiers and staff. To him, you are an individual who is interesting enough to grant a personal nickname. Even if that nickname is “Red Handfish.”

“Yeah, he did. I saw his blazer.” You think back to the black fabric you saw before entering the alley. “I bet he’s doing the whole ‘I can’t let you live’ conversation with her.”

In the story, one of the thugs reveals Jade’s identity as a mafia boss in front of (Y/N) before he passes out. How a common foot soldier of the Carpenter mafia can recognize Jade, whose face is kept classified from lower-ranked members of the underworld, is worrying enough to warrant investigation. This could simply be a result of poor writing from the original plot, but you are also an example of the original story’s loose ends. If someone like you, who was meant to disappear after page two, can still have any significance and will instead of vaporizing immediately after you left that alley, then you can’t be too careful.

“Bet he’s being real smooth with it.” Floyd cackles, his raspy laugh reminding you of a chain smoker after five consecutive packs. “She’s gonna fall for it hook, line, and sinker.”

“Of course. We’re talking about Jade.” Even under regular circumstances, he’s charming enough to lure any poor, unsuspecting fool to their demise. “They’re going to come here any minute now. Let’s go inside.”

You pass the security guards and enter the Leech property. A perfectly paved ground with colourful stones and not a weed in sight. A marble fountain surrounded by neat, rectangular hedges. And of course, the enormous white mansion with huge double doors, which in turn have proportionally huge fancy glass windows. For (Y/N) to have a “perfect” ending, the world must allow her to escape her current life of scrimping and saving by marrying her into a wealthy family.

“I wonder what the little minnow looks like.” Floyd hums, sauntering into the living room. “I bet she’d break easily if I squeezed real hard, huh?”

“Don’t do that.” The two of you sit on a velvet couch. Floyd’s long limbs sprawl out and take up the majority of the space. You settle on the far end. “And are you going to keep calling her a minnow?”

“Dunno, haven’t met her yet.”

“She’s very pretty. When you meet her, I’m sure you’ll get the feeling that there’s something special about her.”

The story emphasizes how much Floyd adores (Y/N). She is supposed to become a sort of mood stabilizer for him, keeping him consistently happy in her presence. You wonder if that will actually happen. Floyd can and will throw tantrums around people he holds dear. His mood that flips at the drop of the hat seems difficult to stabilize on just affection alone.

He shrugs non-committedly. Just as you’re about to suggest a nickname he could use, your phone buzzes.

Five minutes away. Jade’s text is short and to the point. You stand and stretch, getting ready to play Peeping Tom.

“Remember, don’t say anything about the original plot, okay?” Floyd’s unpredictable nature worries you. You know that your reminder won’t do much if Floyd decides it would be fun to spill the beans anyway, but you can’t help yourself.

“I know, I know.” He frowns and waves you off. Laughing, you move to the room across the hall. He hates being told what to do, but he’s in a good mood right now. It won’t be a problem.

The front door creaks open. Through a crack in the door, you watch Jade carry (Y/N) in his arms like a princess and set her down on the couch. Smooth, easy, efficient, the way he likes to do everything. Even though you know he is acting, his movements, the soft look in his eyes, are almost believable to you. And you’ve known him for fifteen years. There’s an odd stirring in your chest. Guilt? Envy? You tamp it down.

For a fraction of a second, you swear you make eye contact with him. If he notices you, he doesn’t show it. He seems to redouble his efforts on acting sweet to (Y/N). It might just be your imagination.

Floyd pokes around at the two of them the way he always does when he’s curious about something new. His grating laugh fills the air while Jade bandages a scrape on her knee. Good, the scene is going exactly as described in the story. (Y/N)’s first colourful and memorable experience with her future family. Her new family must be fun, rich, kind to her, and love her unconditionally no matter the circumstances. Her new family has to be better in every way compared to her current one—a mother who passed away at childbirth and a scummy father who neglects her. For an author, these are simply lazy ways to give her a tragic backstory and simultaneously pretend her parents don’t exist for the rest of the story because they don’t add to the romance.

How horrible. How could a late mother and neglectful father not affect a person? How could they simply be written off as another thing the male lead “saves” her from? And for that matter, how can the author casually write in a scene where she is cornered by adult men who are physically far stronger than her, who harass her and make disgusting comments, just so she can meet the male lead? How can they just pretend that won’t lead to any trauma?

You know firsthand how (Y/N) lives her life, because despite the story labeling you as the disposable Friend A, you genuinely have been her friend for the past year. You’ve seen her live on plain rice porridge for days to cut grocery costs. You’ve seen her wear clothes until they are threads because she can’t afford to buy new ones. Oh, but isn’t it wonderful that she’s skinny and looks good in everything?

What a load of bullshit.

#disney twst #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #jade leech #jade leech x reader #twst fanfic #floyd leech #twst jade #(y/n)'s the main character but you aren't her #slow burn #you're gonna have to read some plot #before you get to the fluff #this is actually just my excuse to write something sort of meta

[thrandilf]

The thing that's really throwing me off the most about the live action ATLA is how this is supposed to have a more mature/darker angle

But the subtext and suspense the original had is all Gone you're just told so many things directly and characters give so much unnatural exposition dialogue right away like there's no hinting or wondering about anything and for it trying to be more mature it got simplistic in the most annoying sort of way

Like they're scared people are gonna turn off the show if there's any questions in our minds about anything

Baffling storytelling failures to me that like. Are basic screenwriting stuff

And it's killing me because I wanted this to be good so badly

#the cast is great it is NOT their fault but i just. andbdjdbdbdsjjddh. #atla live action #atla live action critical #atla

[writingquestionsanswered]

How do I make my writing less.. like I'm rambling? I speak and type in a way that is very much rambling but I want my writing (even if it's just a fanfic) to be more on topic ig?

How to Ramble Less in Your Writing

1 - Have a plan - Planning doesn't have to mean figuring out every last detail--creating scene lists, outlines, and timelines. It can mean that, and if that would help you, do it! But mainly "having a plan" in writing just means that you know the general plot. Who is this story about? What is the conflict? Why does the protagonist want to resolve the conflict? How will they go about it? What obstacles do they face along the way? Who or what placed those obstacles there? How will the character, their situation, or their world have changed by the end of the story? At the very least, having a beginning to end summary is a great way to format the answers to these questions and give you a plan to follow.

2 - Balance Exposition, Dialogue, and Action - If you find yourself rambling a lot in your story, you might be doing too much exposition, aka "explaining things." Remember that scenes (and your story in general) should be a balance of exposition, dialogue (conversation), and action (things happening). When you balance these things out in your story, you will find that you probably ramble less.

3 - Ramble First, Edit Later - Rambling in your writing isn't always a bad thing. For some writers, that's just part of the first draft process. It's sort of a "throw everything at the wall and see what sticks" method of writing, but it works really well for some writers. Some of the best stories in the world were written that way. The key is to go back and edit what's there so you can take out the things that "didn't stick" and clean up the things that did.

4 - Start With a Mind Map - If you find yourself having difficulty staying on topic in your story, try doing a mind map before you start writing and let all those rambling thoughts come out in an organized way. This can help you see all those seemingly random connections your brain is making between elements in your story, which is what sends you off on these rambling paths in the first place. Not only does this let your brain get all those random connections out of its system before you start writing, it also gives you the ability to look at what's there and see if there's anything worth working into something more relevant and cohesive to the story.

5 - Break It Up Into Smaller Parts - Another thing you can try is to break your writing up into smaller parts, which has the effect of putting up barriers that keep you from rambling too far off course. Try to focus on writing a scene... know what you want to accomplish in the scene before you start writing. Figure out the beginning point, the midpoint, and the end point. Then, plot the path between each point. If you still find yourself rambling, break it up by point. Write from the beginning to the midpoint. Then from the midpoint to the end point. Breaking it into smaller parts forces your brain to focus on that smaller part rather than giving it the opportunity to run off into the wild.

Happy writing! ♥

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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[resdayn]

Overall I thought Nocturne was better from an art perspective and worse from... basically every other perspective than Season 1 of Castlevania. Which is really quite sad to me, considering it had double the episodes that Castlevania's first season had.

The art style and animation is incredible, and the music was quite good as well. The character design was also amazing, and nearly the entire main cast looked inspired and interesting. Honestly, it felt like the artists and animators were flexing the entire time.

But the pacing, the voice acting, the setting, the story in general, the sheer amount of exposition, and the dialogue were all lacking so badly. The show tried to accomplish way too much in 8 episodes and suffered pretty terribly for it. If they had scaled the story down significantly, they would have had a lot more time to get the audience actually invested in the characters and plot. It's quite hard to pull off the emotional beats that they attempted when the character has been on screen for 5 minutes total, and for me nearly all of them fell flat. It's especially disappointing that the season ended with the characters losing terribly, because it'll probably be a year at least before we get a continuation (if we get one at all).

Huge spoilers under the cut:

Getting to see Alucard at the end was exciting, but it didn't feel like quite the right time. We're just starting to know these characters, so throwing the arguably Most Beloved Castlevania Character into the mix doesn't seem like a particularly good way to get people invested in the rest of the cast. I guess it'll depend on if they can fix the pacing and dialogue issues, but I'm not keeping my hopes up. Either way, glad I got to see his SotN Kojima-style design animated, even if it looks a little divorced from the OG design.

#castlevania nocturne #castlevania #castlevania nocturne spoilers #alucard castlevania #richter belmont #maria renard #SPOILERS #my posts #castlevania spoilers #for the record if you disagree thats cool. dont tell me about it though because i dont care

[biconickyoshi]

NAtLA first impressions (eps 1 & 2)

Here are my thoughts as someone who has been a superfan of the original series since 2007 (spoiler-free first, then spoilers below)!

Honestly, I'm feeling pretty middle of the road about this adaptation so far. I like a lot of the costuming, and some of the actors are good, while others have felt a bit lackluster. There's also some characterization choices I didn't like too much for certain characters (which I will get into in the spoiler sections below). The score is definitely not as good as the original series - I don't particularly like the new elements of the score, and when themes and motifs from the original score are used, I feel like they aren't used enough. The bending, while better than the 2010 version, still feels a bit fake and clunky, as do a lot of the special effects. There's also a problem with a reliance on exposition dialogue, moreso in the first ep than the second.

Now we'll get into the spoiler section. Don't read below this if you do not wanna be spoiled.

EP 1: "Aang"

What I liked:

Getting to see a bit more of the Air Nomads (which makes the genocide feel even more devastating)

The design of the Southern Air Temple felt very warm and inviting - I liked that there were lots of trees and whatnot

The added details about the Sozin purposefully allowing news of the war to be leaked to the Earth Kingdom to throw everyone off their trail of planning to attack the Air Nomads

Making the comet a special event for the Air Nomads, which brings them all together at the Southern Air Temple for Sozin's attack to happen

I like that Wolf Cove was actually called Wolf Cove (since it's never name dropped in the actual show)

Zuko and Iroh did a good job - I think Dallas is capturing Zuko's energy pretty well, and while Paul's Iroh feels a bit different than the OG, he's still doing a good job

What I was not so keen on:

Yep... I really didn't like that Aang didn't purposefully run away, and instead went to "clear his head" after Monk Gyatso told him he was the Avatar, fully intending to return before getting caught in the storm.

They really weren't kidding about removing Sokka's sexism. Instead of Aang being released bc of Katara's anger at this, they just happen upon the iceberg, and somehow while trying to waterbend their canoe closer she waterbends the iceberg open behind her??

Exposition dump from Gran Gran... and her basically just straight up telling Aang to his face "You're the last airbender! All your people are dead! And you're probably the Avatar too!" It all felt very wooden and definitely a bad change from how Aang realizes he's in the future in the OG series.

I had high hopes for a lot of the actors, and I hate to say it (especially considering Sokka's actor is likely not even indigenous at all), but Sokka has felt like the best actor so far. His lines come across a lot more naturally than Katara's and Aang's often do. Aang is alright, and of course looks and acts the part, but the way he speaks his lines sometimes feels too quick/unnatural. Sadly, I think Katara's acting has been the worst so far - in this episode I didn't see any of the emotion in her eyes that I felt like I should've been seeing. I will say I think she got a bit better in ep 2.

Aang, Katara, and Sokka just don't feel close. They never got time to go penguin sledding, to hang out with the village kids, etc. They still feel like strangers.

Speaking of, I guess Aang went out of the Avatar State by thinking about Gyatso? Again, that distance between him and the siblings (especially Katara) is glaring. Katara in general just seems to lack the spark she has in the OG.

EP 2: "Warriors"

What I liked:

Seeing the Fire Navy port - it felt very SEA-inspired, and that street food looked delicious lol.

Kyoshi Island being run by a woman (Suki's mom). Just makes more sense to me lol.

Suki - I looooved how they portrayed her as this kind of socially awkward character who wants to talk to Sokka but doesn't know how. It makes so much sense with her being isolated her whole life. I also felt like her and Sokka had quite a bit of chemistry.

The final Kyoshi battle was pretty cool

I kinda liked Zhao and Zuko both being at Kyoshi Island

Zuko's desperation to find Aang - he really felt like a kid to me in this ep with the acting choices Dallas made.

Strangely, I don't hate them nerfing the Avatar State a bit by making it to where Aang can only enter it when he's in an Avatar shrine. I didn't even realize it at first but the reason he goes into the Avatar State in the SAT is because Gyatso's skeleton was in Yangchen's shrine. I still prefer OG series Avatar State though.

I like that Kyoshi warns Aang with the vision about the Fire Nation's attack on the Northern Water Tribe. It gives him an incentive to get there faster instead of meandering.

What I was not so keen on:

Zhao seems to be a much less arrogant character here, at least outwardly. I know he was probably a bit cartoon villain-y in the OG series, but this dude just feels like another commander. Maybe that will change as I watch more. He's definitely conniving.

The goofy ass high beam lights from the Kyoshi statue's eyes

Kyoshi's characterization... This Kyoshi feels like the caricature all the casual fans perceive her to be (i.e. violence and strength are the best way, smite my enemies type of thing). I also didn't like how she just kept berating Aang for running away (which is weird that everyone keeps accusing him of this bc this version of Aang literally didn't even run away).

Aang is very driven to master the elements and defeat the Fire Lord in this version, which isn't necessarily a bad thing... But I feel like if anything, they could have at least kept it to where he ran away the night of the genocide, even if they didn't want to show him ignoring his responsibilities to go on adventures in the bulk of the show. A major part of Aang's character arc is him learning to accept his destiny and stop running/avoiding.

Once again, no Sokka sexism arc. This ep in the OG series was very important for him, but that's nonexistent here.

Once again, Katara's acting, while better than ep 1, feels like it's lacking emotion.

Overall, it's obviously better than the 2010 movie so far, and I enjoyed the eps to a degree, but there's still a lot of things that I wasn't super fond of. The changes that they seem to have made so far aren't too extreme yet, and I'm actually looking forward to seeing how far they end up deviating from the original show.

The whole time I was watching, I just couldn't stop thinking about how much better the original show is. I just kept missing the characters I knew and loved. Also, I still firmly believe this world and story truly works best in animation.

#natla #netflix atla #netflix avatar the last airbender #atla #avatar the last airbender #natla spoilers #netflix atla spoilers #atla meta #natla meta

[reyesstrand]

20 questions for fic writers

thank you for the tags @welcometololaland @strandnreyes & @alrightbuckaroo <33 this was a much needed distraction tonight!

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

86

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

335,298

3. what fandoms do you write for?

predominantly 911 lone star. the only other thing i’ve dabbled in recently was the old guard

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos? (i’m going to exclude prompt collections here!)

like a bright new dream (first i love you)

wanna be still with you (2x08 coda)

lit the spark (that set a fire) (firefighter!carlos au)

take me back to the light (1x08 coda)

to be reborn (3x04 coda)

5. do you respond to comments? why or why not?

i do!! even if it takes a few days (where i’m likely just staring at nice words in my inbox and using them as fuel to brighten my mood) i love having that connection, and seeing maybe what stood out to someone who read my silly little story

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

any of my codas that i wrote immediately after an episode aired—my 3x02 spec fic some and now none of you, or my 3x07 coda/3x08 spec fic not a victory march—simply because we didn’t know the outcome for these storylines yet, and i let myself get angsty.

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

i think 95% of my fics have happy endings but to shout one out in particular….hm. i’d say got real love maybe—truly just. fluff. and the boys coming home to each other and making that official. i also think the proposal bliss in (not afraid of) living on a fault line has got to be up there as well

8. do you get hate on fics?

nothing major

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

i’ve always stuck to very implied levels of smut in my fics….idk i always worry i won’t be able to make it sound good when there’s people out there who do it brilliantly. however i’m challenging myself with food fic which does have some smut (with feelings. oh the feelings)

10. do you write crossovers? what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

crossovers aren’t really my thing!!

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

nope, would be honoured though!

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

love helping with brainstorming bits, but have never actually co-written anything

14. what’s your all time favourite ship?

tarlos brainrot always and forever

15. what’s a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i have tons of ideas that i never commit to, which sucks. off the top of my head…the andrea & tk fic that i just never got into a flow with

16. what are your writing strengths?

i think i’m strongest when it comes to setting a scene; when exploring what that character is feeling. i like to think i can kind of evoke a mood through imagery? i’m most comfortable when it comes to introspection and exposition and general narrative

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

i tell myself i’m getting better, but i’d say dialogue is the constant thing that throws me off. i also worry i over-write sometimes

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i like it, if it’s being done with good intentions and suits the character. i’d imagine for heavier dialogue it would make sense to ask for someone who speaks the language to read it over to make sure it’s accurate

19. first fandom you wrote for?

i think the get down, back in like 2017

20. favourite fic you’ve written?

i can’t choose, so i present to you two wildly different honeymoons. first, dream this night away—almost 8.5k words after a seven month gap between posting when my writer’s block was at an ultimate high. then of course, to which there is no reply—i’ve been growing happier and happier with my writing especially with these last few fics of mine, and this one is something i’m just super proud of, and the support on it definitely brought me to tears a bit ajdnskdn

no pressure tagging @carlos-in-glasses @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @paperstorm @tailoredshirt @theghostofashton @inflarescent @birdclowns @liminalmemories21 @rmd-writes @heartstringsduet @freneticfloetry @orchidscript @tellmegoodbye @safeashousespdf and leaving an open tag as well!! <333

#tag games #my fic #think i’m getting a cold so time to pass out on some cough syrup 😞

[justdalek]

Okay, this might just be me not digging deep enough, but I feel like people complain about the musical numbers in Hazbin Hotel coming across as “jarring” without diagnosing the reason why the music is jarring to the viewer.

I have been rewatching the episodes quite a bit, until the realization hit me in episode 6:

There’s no true transitions from background music, to vamps, to the actual song for most of the songs in the series thus far.  And in some instances, there’s no vamps at all.

Let me explain.

A vamp (in terms of musicals) is when there is music that leads up to the musical number that is about to be performed.  For example, in Disney’s 1989 The Little Mermaid, the sequence right before the song “Under the Sea” has the beginning melody of the song play underneath Sebastian’s dialogue of him telling Ariel that going to the surface is a bad idea.  That little music diddly evolves into Under the Sea naturally without hitting the audience from out of left field.  This was popularized by Howard Ashman, who was a pioneer for the revival of Disney and its movie musicals with the Renaissance Era.  The point of the vamps is to introduce the motif of the song fixing to be song, as well as helping to aid in the character’s mounting emotions that lead them into singing.

To quote Ashman, “You have so much emotion that you have to sing it.  Then you have even more emotion that you must dance.”

Keep in mind that Hazbin Hotel is basing its format off of traditional Broadway musicals.  Each 20-minute episode has two songs in it, usually being sung by the protagonists, or occasionally the antagonists.  The songs move the plot along, as well as provide exposition or a tension for the plot of the episode and the overarching plot of the season.

Here’s the song list (up to episode 6):

Episode 1: Happy Day in Hell (Charlie and Citizens of Hell) and Hell is Forever (Adam and Lute)

Episode 2: Stayed Gone (Vox and Alastor) and It Starts with Sorry (Charlie, Sir Pentious, Vaggie, Angel Dust)

Episode 3: Respectless (Carmilla, Velvette,  Zestial) and Whatever It Takes (Zestial, Carmilla, Vaggie)

Episode 4: Poison (Angel Dust) and Loser, Baby (Husker and Angel Dust)

Episode 5: Hell’s Greatest Dad (Lucifer and Alastor) and More Than Anything (Lucifer and Charlie)

Episode 6: Welcome to Heaven (Heaven Ensemble) and You Didn’t Know (Emily, Charlie, Sera, Adam, Lute)

Let’s dissect each number in terms of its introduction (I can make whole posts on all the numbers, but that’s a post for another day unless you guys want me to talk about it more).

Happy Day in Hell

Man, this song makes sense but also no sense with its introduction.  If you wind the episode back 10 seconds before the song starts, you will notice that the background music completely stops as Vaggie says something about the extermination while Charlie is catching her breath.  Then, Charlie immediately starts her song.

If the background music continued to swell through under Vaggie’s dialogue and morphed into the motif of Happy Day, then the musical number would’ve not have been so weirdly started.

Hell is Forever

This song has an interesting vamp in that it starts with higher instruments detailing Charlie’s hops as she lays down her plans to show Adam and Lute.  My issue with this particular vamp is that the background music right before it is (again) hard cut with a couple seconds of pure silence before we are immediately thrusted into the vamp.  This comes off as a very weird choice as I think that the music should’ve continued through without breaking it apart like that.  It would’ve made the quickness of the reprise of Happy Day in Hell seem more natural in comparison to the dialogue, as well as not throw the viewer off the rails with a slowish background song then an immediate whiplash into the musical number with no real transition.

Stayed Gone

This is one of the few songs that I think works perfectly (it's also my favorite but shhhh).  The vamp and emotion from Vox is on point, and I really wish that most of the songs would take from this song’s set up.

It Starts with Sorry

This one is kinda a weird one for me, and it’s very specific.  The transition from the background music to the vamp is wonderful, but then the transition from the vamp to the actual song has this almost abrupt cut.  The vamp has strings, but then it’s barely a fade into the glockenspiel of the actual song.  It causes this very weird sound drop that makes it not sound right at all.  If the strings would’ve stayed, but at a much quieter level with a resolution chord for the song, you can still have the same effect of the beginning measure of Sorry without that weird track change (Don’t worry, I’ll talk about the audio editing later).

Respectless

I dunno why I had it in my head originally that there was no background music before the song began, but honestly if this particular song didn’t have the background music, it would’ve been perfect actually.  This style of song is like an argument, so it would’ve made sense for it to come out of left field because Velvette (and the audience by extension) was not expecting Carmilla to defend Zestial.  However, there’s this weird choice of having tensions with the strings, then immediately having a guitar strum over it that doesn’t gel well with it at all before the background music gets cut off abruptly.  For this one, it’s not even a musical choice, this is almost a weird editing choice that I am not sure how to feel about.

Whatever It Takes

(This is my least favorite song for a number of reasons.  Bare with me on this one)

I think this song is the biggest beef I have in terms of how it’s introduced.  The mood is somber, and the vamp towards the song is quiet, but then the song is immediately loud, almost like it’s shouting.  I had my headphones all the way up to listen to the background and the vamp, and I almost threw off my headphones when the first notes of the song and that Zestial sing started playing (no shade to either).  I’m not sure what the hell was going on in the audio mixing department, but the songs are not doing well at all in the context of the episode (outside of it, they’re both great).

Poison

I love the vamp into the song for this one, personally one of my favorites of that mount musical volume before Angel starts to sing.  My one issue with it is the background music right before it.  It’s only a couple of seconds, but it shouldn’t be there at all.  I understand that it’s part of the Vee’s “menace theme”, but it should’ve just stayed out and kept the silence.  It would’ve made the vamp into Poison so much more effective.

Loser, Baby

This one is an odd one.  No vamp, just pure silence before Husk breaks into song.  I feel like the silence could’ve been prolonged just a touch more, then Husk starts to sing without the piano.  I feel like the beginning piano lick ruins that silence between Husk and Angel’s confessions to each other, and makes the song feel jarring to the lines right before it.

Hell’s Greatest Dad

Hrmm, I’m… perplexed.

There isn’t a musical problem this go around, but there is a set problem.  The chandelier that falls from the ceiling is meant to signify to Lucifer that his daughter does in fact need his help, but that chandelier has (at least to my recollection) never appeared once in the show, let alone the episode.  It’s the falling set piece that makes this song outright jarring because the setup doesn’t work at all.  Music-wise, it’s fine, no complaints from me.

More Than Anything

Listening to all these scenes back to back made me realize a problem that this song is the biggest sufferer of: volume change.  Just like with Whatever It Takes, the sudden volume change from the background music into the vamp is simply jarring.  I understand that it’s two different tracks that are put next to each other, but you can lower the volume of the vamp to make its transition so much more natural.  I’m not sure if this style for the musical numbers is an oversight or a deliberate decision at this point, but I honestly think that the audio volume is perhaps a bigger culprit than the music transitions.

Welcome to Heaven 

This feels like two scenes Frankensteined together.  You have Emily introducing herself, as well as (probably) her motif playing in the background, then out of left field, St. Peter starts to sing the song. 

Full stop. 

You cannot cut from one shot to the next as a musical transition from speech to song.  It would’ve made much more sense to have Emily and Charlie walking towards the gates, then St. Peter and Emily say “Welcome to heaven” as the music starts to play for the number.

You Didn’t Know

The music transition is a bit smoother (volume still needs adjustment, but not nearly as much as More Than Anything), but the tension in the score isn’t really there, which I feel like is the culprit for this song.  If there was tension in the music while Sera was talking and Emily was looking at the list, it would’ve made more sense to have Emily sing instead of talk.  In all honesty, if Emily would’ve spoken, “But she was right,” then Sera says, “What?” then Emily sings, “But she was right, Sera,” I think that would’ve made this transition work almost perfectly.

This is no shade at anybody working on Hazbin Hotel, this was just something I noticed nobody talking about.  The team is doing a wonderful job on the show, and I absolutely love it all!  I’m just wanting to give my two cents on a topic that no one was really delving into.

Lemme know if you guys want me to talk in more detail about any of the songs, I am more than happy to do so!

#d chats #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel spoilers #I've spent too long in the music and mass comm world lol #I had a lot of fun relistening to a lot of the songs #but ye just my opinion #feel free to agree (respectfully) or disagree (respectfully) #I just hope this issue is resolved in season 2 but this is a very nitpick thing #i love the series as a whole rn #I also will forever quote Howard Ashman til the day I die lol

[cross-my-heartt]

Some thoughts on the first book in the Thrawn trilogy.

They're a bit messy because I'm going off of memory as I didn't take notes at the time but oh well.

[MAJOR SPOILERS FROM HERE ON, BEWARE!]

I'm gonna start by saying that I didn't expect the adventures of space Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson but I'm definitely not complaining. It's a tried and true formula and Nightswan as their Moriarty worked well while it lasted.

Also you know a book and its characters are good when it gets you to cheer for the 'bad guys'. And I'm only putting that in quotes because you get a genuine sense that despite the corruption and bias galore, a large part of the personnel are just regular people working a job and trying to go about their lives.

Arihnda's arc was really well done - you sympathize with her while she's an underdog, getting betrayed, manipulated and used by others. She's wily and ambitious and resilient and you're like yas, queen slay. But the more she plays the game the more you see her crossing lines until the final arc where you realize just how ruthless she's become, or maybe always was, and you get that sense of 'oh shit'. (Keep in mind I haven't watched rebels so I didn't know where she would end up.)

It's the same sense you get when you reach the Wookie slaves arc and it sinks in that the quirky duo you've been following are in fact working for the most evil person in the galaxy.

As for Thrawn himself, I didn't expect to enjoy him this much. His final conversation with Nightswan in particular - I always felt like there was something off about his motivations and his apparent ignorance in politics. That scene confirmed that he's even cleverer and craftier than he lets on and put that dissonance to rest.

He's persuasive to the point where you almost wish things would go his way too. I love how it's a running theme throughout the book for people to be frustrated by how much sense he makes and you even sympathize with that as a reader sometimes.

I'm really happy with the parallels the author makes throughout, something I'm seeing in Alliances as well. There's Thrawn and his art and Eli and his numbers, Thrawn's 'bigger picture' logic and Nightswan's principles. Characters really shine when they have a good foil in the story.

And finally Eli. Another character I didn't expect to like so much. Such a genuine plucky guy. It was fun to see him go from being ambiguous about Thrawn to constantly being shocked at how much he trusts him. And being so protective of him, bless.

I'm glad he got his own arc, going from someone who's charted out his whole future and desperately wants to stick to what's familiar to being willing to leave all of that behind and jump into the unknown by joining the Chiss (which was foreshadowed in Thrawn's conversation with Nightswan but still made me a bit sad).

Of course, I do have some complaints, the biggest one being the dialogue and how clunky and awkward it feels at times. Which is especially obvious when you have these supposed cunning politicians throwing the simplest most blunt threats at each other with no subtlety whatsoever.

The book's exposition also suffered because of it. I daresay that has improved in book two but that may just be because there's less politician talk and it's a mostly military setting.

Finally a lot of Thrawn's conclusions feel like a huge reach but I'm willing to let that one slide. Say we assume he knows more than he lets on to the readers.

But all things considered, those are minor complaints and I really enjoyed the book. Can definitely say I'm tempted to see all four seasons of Rebels just to get more of Thrawn.

#thrawn #thrawn spoilers #thrawn trilogy spoilers #thrawn trilogy #grand admiral thrawn

[the-irrelevant-trumpeter]

OKAY PERCY JACKSON SERIES THOUGHTS REAL QUICK not in any particular order just what my brain is spewing

(spoilers obviously)

okay so like. it was so good. screaming crying throwing up like!!!!

walker leah and aryan are all excellent and i'm so excited to see them throughout the rest of the show

special shoutout to leah because in these first two eps she's had a lot less screentime than the other two and yet she has completely stolen the show for me

forgot that jason mantzoukas is in this and got jumpscared lmao

the car and then minotaur scenes would have been really good if i had been able to see them

i feel like i was expecting luke's scar to be bigger. this isn't a complaint or anything, just an observation.

"NO I AM SALLY JACKSON'S SON" slayed so hard like i screameddd

percy praying to his mum <3333 there's one thing percy jackson will do and that is think of his mum as a goddess

also HIM BURNING THE JELLYBEANS 😭😭😭

also also him telling his mum that he really feels like he's made friends when you know he's talking about luke is TRAGIC oh no the final episode is going to be sooo good and so heartbreaking. oof.

i really REALLY liked virginia kull as sally, but a lot of the dialogue in her scenes felt a bit clunky to me. idk i know they need exposition and all that, but some of it felt a bit weird. especially their conversation right before she was killed

okay i know a few people in the tag have already talked about this, but sally and gabe felt a little off to me. i know the posts i've seen have said that they downplayed how completely and utterly awful gabe is, and while i do think it was downplayed a little bit, he was still bad enough that i didn't feel like that was a major issue. the part that didn't feel quite right to me was the way sally argued back at him. i feel like what she says to him is kind of what the audience should WANT her to say (because gabe's a dick), but the point is that she doesn't say that, because sally jackson loves percy so damn much that she willingly endures that until she is able to get out of that situation. i swear i'm not going to be like "tHiS iSnT hOw iT iS iN tHe bOoK" much, because it's an adaptation and it's going to have to make some changes and that's fine! but in the book, percy states that he's "never heard her raise her voice or say an unkind word to anyone, not even me or gabe" and keeps on emphasising how she constantly withstands gabe and doesn't move against him because of her love for percy, and i just feel like that's an important aspect of her character. also i feel like sally arguing back at gabe is going to make her finally killing him less impactful. and i think it probably also plays a part in gabe's assholery being downplayed. because the argument they have there feels much more like "oh we're so dysfunctional ha ha" instead of "this is an abusive household". you know what i mean? idk i get that it was meant to be a #girlboss moment, and a part of me was like "YEAH GET HIS ASS", but i do feel like that moment didn't serve sally's character as well, changed the dynamic of sally and gabe's relationship, and negatively affected the impact the story will have when percy gives her the means to get rid of gabe and she takes it. this is a very long dot point i'm sorry.

mr d pretending to be percy's dad was SO FUNNY

clarisse is too pretty (/pos), like i was barely paying attention in her scenes because i was literally there like "women <3" thank you dior goodjohn

"you fell in love with god... like jesus?" is a top tier line

i'm so sorry but i'm a "tah-lia" pronunciation truther and it will remain this way in my head

the cut to percy flossing in the woods killed me. like straight up killed me dead.

BLACKJACK BEING THE FIRST MAGICAL THING PERCY SEES!!! THEY'RE GOING TO BE BESTIES!!!

these are all of the thoughts i have atm, and despite my more negative thoughts here, my feelings are almost completely positive (my excitement is less coherent than my criticisms, so i didn't write about them as much). i'm really excited to see the rest of the episodes!

#idk whether i should tag this or not #feeling dangerous. i might just. #percy jackson #percy jackson and the olympians #pjo #percy jackson series #pjo series #that'll do. it's been a while since i've posted in a main tag but i am being so brave about this. #feel like i'm forgetting something but idk what so!

[iravaid]

Any thoughts on Beckett VTM? [:

Cuthbert Beckett Vampirethemasquerade... I can't say i have many thoughts, i haven't read the books etc but I have a peripheral understanding of what goes on, and he's a fun character!

Loved him in the game, found it very fun to find out he Does So Much More in the books ie. fucking nasty, being an ethically challenged historian, and having horny beef with THE ANGEL OF CAINE. And he's so snarky, his line '... Sebastian, was it?' made me laugh, and it was fun to have him as a source of Kindred lore ingame as the dialogue he presents it with also gives Beckett a lot of character, instead of solely being the info-dump exposition NPC. He's probably had to deal with So Much Shit from high ranking kindred in different domains, it's like a reward when he gets to be a bitch towards them <3

Also, augh, I LOVE his design! It's so cool! Luminant orange eyes with pricked pupils shining from behind a pair of sunglasses? Long flowing hair? CLAWS? Can turn into a wolf? Serving biblically accurate vampiric cunt

Him being a general menace was also v fun in the game, because he's there for the 'odd goings on' in LA, and then later for the mystery surrounding the sarcophagus; he won't waste time with pleasantries/bootlicking the Domain's Prince/Regent/Baron/Bishop because him as an Autarkis really doesn't care. He's here for the potential historical artefact and the chance to find further insight into the origins of Kindred, and it's not in his character to entertain some Kindred two-hundred years his junior trying to throw around weight they don't have.

Reckon he has a huge pain tolerance + general endurance, apparently he's run the length of a football stadium in sunlight and I'd believe that. That coupled with his Gangrel feral marks makes for this really interesting contrast between his appearance + physical capabilities and his academic pursuits and passions, usually with this kind of character they don't tend to be a full indiana jones-type; he pulls it off v well! Wonder if this also has an in-universe basis as well, as other Kindred may excpect Beckett to be of the more 'academic' or esteemed clans that'd pursue what he does - I know some thought him Malkavian because of his adoptive sire and general mannerisms but hey, who knows, lmao

I can see him plummeting into the Depths of obsession when it comes to things like Kindred history and artefacts etc., there's a cloying pull to both finding out that which has been forgotten or lost (and perhaps should've stayed that way), as well as getting the chance to say He was the one who discovered it. That can come at the cost of friendships, his health, things like that, though. Beckett does have a fair bit of clout and/or infamy in some Kindred circles thanks to his exploits, what with the line 'my reputation, for once, doesn't precede me.' He's used to being known, used to being as much spectacle as his quests themselves.

As a last general thought, I can see Beckett being quite vain in his own way - maintaining hair like his, aesthetics like his, makes it feel that he does put thought and time into how he comes across, both as a personal reason and tactical in order to best do his job and keep up appearances as THE Beckett, Noddist and Archaeologist

So yeah! Thank you for the ask, had fun talking about mister not-werewolf-but-there-is-a-wolf-in-there-somewhere!

#Ask #beckett vtm #cuthbert beckett #vtm #vtmb #vampire the masquerade #gangrel

[zalrb]

knock off tvd walter boys 1x02 review

Is there a reason the author wanted it to sound like altar boys? Do they all worship the goddess that is Jackie?

Damon, I mean, Cole, and the best friend. DRAMAAAAAA.

"He used to be the best quarterback in the county" why are we doing exposition like this? Can't she see a picture or a trophy or something and it can be a kernel for something to explore later?

This is definitely giving me when Elena went to Damon's room for the first time and saw that there were books and it was supposed to be a REVELATION.

Honestly, I'm probably just going to make constant TVD correlations now. If I didn't take this show seriously before, I definitely do not take it seriously now.

"He smashed up his leg last winter and now he can't play anymore. Cole lived for football" I can literally see this as written exposition in the wattpad story.

Why doesn't this child have to do chores?

"I usually warm up with a jog, sound good?" I don't run but is that not how every runner warms up for a run?

Show his abs all you want, he is not attractive.

This show is so bad at chaos. I know not everything can be The Bear and especially 2.06 of The Bear but at least channel Cheaper of the Dozen which this is also clearly inspired by

THIS is chaos.

Why wouldn't Donna tells Jackie that there's a schedule for the bathroom? Why wouldn't Jackie deduce that when there is a village of children living at this house?

Bro, I'm breaking that fucking camera.

I know it's supposed to be boys boying and I know teenagers are sociopaths but her entire family basically has just died. And you're doing things like bleaching her hair? Her family is dead! LIKE?

That Black woman deserves more than this Andrew Garfield funhouse knockoff. I swear this show fills me with rage.

"Hi." "Hi." That's your future mother in law and you guys sound like you barely know each other.

"They think we're too young" you look like you're 35.

Like at least when they wanted me to believe that Tom Welling was a senior in high school, it was Tom Welling so I got to look at this

"Jackie. Is this your locker?" Who ELSE would it belong to, Elijah Wood Stefan???

"Fellowship of the Ring. Do you know it?" I CAN'T DEAL WITH HOW PAINFUL THIS IS. Why WOULDN'T she know it? At least the title.

You know, Fake Damon and Fake Stefan are both extraordinarily terrible, Fake Damon this is how you tease-flirt? "Who takes this many notes?" "Me." "Pfft, yeah, dorks like you." ARE YOU IN GRADE 4? Jake Peralta that shit, man

AT LEAST MAKE IT PANDIE

"I'm not a dork!" "Relax, Jackie, I'm just joking" would you still be upset if someone called you a dork in the 10th grade?

What is Jackie's personality exactly?

"You need to come see me. It's not a request, Cole. Make an appointment soon." My guidance counsellors would just call you into their office in the middle of class.

"Damn girl..." never, NEVER, say that again.

I am crying because I think I'd rather watch TSITP and I hate TSITP.

This is how bad all of this is.

I can't deal with Grace and Surfer Damon in the same scene, I think I will throw things.

"Ladies." EW.

AT LEAST BE TIM RIGGINS.

I hate everything about this experience.

THEY GAVE A STELENA SCENE

TO JACKIE AND BLOND BIMBO DAMON?

"the cole effect" "damon just got under my skin"

Someone find me a current teen show that doesn't have stilted dialogue. Do they exist?

That is an aggressively blue cardigan.

"Janie left after you called her bangs stupid" did I just have a particularly mean high school? WHAT are these "insults"? Not even something like "Janie left after you said her bangs made her look like Spock"? REALLY?

Shouldn't there be a staff advisor for student council?

Why do you need to get married now? Just wait or elope if it means that much.

"You're not the only one who wants to get out of here, you know. I want to major in political science at Georgetown." Why is it a big deal in this show for people to have goals?

"People from my background, we don't have much political influence. I want to change that!" NO ONE SPEAKS THIS WAY.

*SCREAMS INTO THE VOID*

WAIT. wait. WAIT. wait. WAIIIIIIIIT. Matt Rife Knock Off Damon isn't a senior??? HOW OLD IS THIS MAN SUPPOSED TO BE?

I'm 14 minutes in. I'm only 14 minutes in. WHY.

Hayley. Jackie. Grace. Kylie. Erin.

"Is that obvious?" "That you're a New Yorker? Yeah." How?

So, there's this scene in the movie Twister where Bill's city fiancee goes back home with him so he can get divorce papers from his first wife and they end up chasing tornadoes, you know, as you do and she stays for dinner and she's just going through a shock and trying to be polite but is close to being catatonic

that should've been a scene. And now I want steak.

"It's a good save with the hat, though." Is that not just common sense?

Has anyone read this story? Do the characters struggle to flirt and find things to talk about in the story as well?

"So you snitched?" You guys are pranking her and her family is DEAD.

Still, at least you're not Belly.

Did he just give her weeds? Like not even a flower but weeds?

No, I'm forwarding through the most awkward play fight or chasing or whatever they're doing.

Sombre music because Jordan who invades everyone's personal space has to give up his camera?

Oh my god, another teenager with GOALS???? THE ANOMALIES.

"Alex, thank you for sticking up for me" do you have any other dialogue with this non human person?

Jackie and Hobbit Stefan are terrible with absolutely no chemistry but she at least looks like she's trying with him

"Man, again?" SHE HAS BEEN THERE FOR LIKE THREE DAYS.

I hate everyone for asking me to watch this but myself the most for agreeing 😫

#review

[raccoonfallsharder]

Chapter 5/20 - Window Across the Galaxy

girl falls first; raccoon falls harder.

He crosses his arms, almost defensively, like he’s waiting for something. She racks her brain for what it could be, and comes up empty, so she just focuses on her food for a minute. She can feel his eyes on her: still calculating, still a little suspicious.  To distract them both, she asks, “Where do you want to go after I get back?” She pauses consideringly. “Or do you need more time here?” She glances toward him and - oh, there it is. His whole body has tightened: shoulders raising, folded arms tensing, teeth gritting. “I gotta go to the Kyln.”

Chapter V. Things No-One Has Said Before. in which one hero refuses to babysit and the other refuses to leave.

this chapter might sound like it has a lot of plot but it has none. none plot. lots of dialogue and exposition. thank you for bearing with me. kinda feel like maybe i should have broken this one up a bit more but if I do that 20 chapters are gonna turn into, like, 50

Please see behind the cut for a more general summary/notes/links to preceding chapters/a brief preview to Chapter VI. Two and a Half Billion Units. Some day I'll figure out a good way to format these posts (open to suggestions n that front).

General Summary~

Rocket is captured by a Ravager crew hoping to get rich off the excessively large bounty on his head. Throwing a wrench in everyone’s plans is the Terran girl they hired to do some freelance assessing on a recent haul of goods they’ve seized from a Xandaran luxury liner. Oops.

let me be real with you: this fic is really about wish-fulfillment. not just the eventual smut (but that too). mostly i just want someone to be nice to my best raccoon

Chapter I. A Delicacy. in which our reluctant heroes meet atop a crate of Sovereign porn in the bowels of a Ravager ship. Chapter II. Monster For A Pet. in which one hero wrestles with his inner Groot, and the other is quite possibly a moron. Chapter III. A Kindness. in which Rocket gets in his own damn way: not for the first time, and certainly not for the last. Chapter IV. Got There First. in which our heroes obtain an arsenal and street food. Chapter V. Things No-One Has Said Before. in which one hero refuses to babysit and the other refuses to leave. Coming Soon: Chapter VI. Two and a Half Billion Units. in which we lean into the “they were roommates” trope. Jolie has misgivings, while Rocket has fantasies - about getting rich, of course.

slight AU starting pre-GOTG volume 1 (but will hit most of the same major plot points). slooowww burn + eventual smut with a lot of pining in the middle. kinda enemies-to-lovers? (but only one of these idiots thinks they're enemies). elements of hurt/comfort because rocket is the saddest-angriest boy. rating will go up and tags will be added to as needed.

#rocket raccoon fanfiction #rocket raccoon x oc #slow burn #enemies to friends to lovers #rocket raccoon #guardians of the galaxy #gotg fanfiction #rocket racoon x reader #rocket fanfiction #gotg #angst with a happy ending

[constantvariations]

V9C10

Here it is, folks. Season finale of the worst RWBY season to ever be made. Yee to the haw

Post Ep: nowhere near as offensive as what I was expecting but holy exposition dump Batman

Noticing this one is 26 minutes long as opposed to last ep’s 16. Thank fuck, I was genuinely worried the finale was going to be bite sized

I swear on every god ever made that if I hear that damn question again I Will Find People

Having this flashback right after the numerous cliffhangers of the last episode is really strange. Unless this is something Ruby is seeing after touching the axe, then this should not be front and center

Is Summer’s hair even long enough to pull off that rose knot? As the y/n protagonist always throwing their hair in a messy bun, I’m no expert on hairstyles, but every time I’ve seen a hair design like that, it’s always been with hair down to the shoulder blades at least

What the hell is that line “I always prefer discretion”? It sounds so unnatural coming from these people and that awkward chuckle afterword cringed my spine into a pretzel. This couple with a child and possible marriage feel like awkward dates at the prom

Why are the mouth animations for smiles this season so damn weird? I wouldn’t be surprised if the animators forgot what a smile looks like considering their circumstances Also does Raven look off to anyone else? I can’t put my finger on it but it’s not quite the same as her V5 model Also also, this makes it really fucking stupid that Yang’s original purpose to finding Raven was to get information on Summer and IT WAS NEVER FOLLOWED THROUGH

OKAY Ruby was seeing it! Thank fuck they got SOMETHING right

Someone put some damn captions on this bitch. I should not be hearing the kits messing with the recycling more than the dialogue

Ruby hasn’t been violent when upset since Weiss and the tree in V1 iirc. Strange trait to bring back now, but aight Also, how the fuck do you get “give up” from “maybe you ain’t the only bitch with this problem.” That’s some Reed Richards stretching right there

Aaaaaaaand back to fucking Jaune. It amuses me that characters who ire me intensely get “fucking” added to their name like an honorific

Alyx’s hair straight up looks like the dusters I use to clean fiber out of the machines at work

Blake straight up did nothing for the solid ten seconds Nyeo attacked her lmaooo

Hey, look! Team attacks! When the fuck did those get strategized?

Listen, I genuinely feel bad for Neo here. I don’t care about the bullshit of last episode; no one deserves to have their body violated like that

Holy fuck that is a visual monstrosity my eyes are fucking burning

“Your time is running out” bitch the caterpillar got a whole day or two, why does Ruby get like. 2 hours max?

God can they stop with the bees we get it theyre canon stop the fucking bees I’m developing a goddamn allergy at this point

Hey, Weiss ain’t the first one to have her aura broken for once!

Feels stupid cheap to have Ruby choose herself because of a thing her mom said while she was asleep a decade ago instead of Ruby actually going through options and debating until she realizes that she can’t/doesn’t want to be anyone else Like. Nothing really happened to make her switch from suicidal to accepting? She saw a flashback, had a vague conversation with the blacksmith, and looked at some weapons. Where is the development? Why is she suddenly okay with being Ruby Rose again when five minutes ago she drank the tea? The biggest thing so far is the flashback, but that’s stupid. Her mother’s impact should NOT be that great considering she a) hasn’t been around for the majority of Ruby’s life, therefore the only tie between them is blood relations and b) was JUST revealed to have left the family willingly for secret reasons

The music is dope though. Red Like Roses has always been one of my favorites

The “We Love Ruby! <3″ lines delivered one by one is so damn awkward. Is this an after school special? Weren’t these the exact kinds of lines that Weiss said LAST EPISODE were unhelpful to Ruby due to the pressure they inadvertently put on her?

Once again, I am asking what the fuck the Neojabbers are since her semblance is MIRROR ILLUSIONS not PHYSICAL TRANSFORMATION. Like, glad that even the heroes are horrified by someone being eaten alive, but it still doesn’t make any sense Also what’s going to happen to Wonderland without Curious as its monitor or whatever? How are the folks who can’t reach the tree without help going to ascend? Is this a good thing or is it going to send Wonderland into an unbalanced nightmare?

“[Neo] will find herself.” Uh huh. Sure MKEK. That’s the reason Neo’s staying in Wonderland instead of charging after Cinder with the force of a thousand suns. Y’all really dragged my dead gay son into this mess for this horseshit

“I like to think we did at least a little good.” Exactly when did you guys help anybody? All I can think of is that stupid cheese root from the first episode

If Little follows them into Remnant I’m throwing RT into the ocean. Especially if they don’t let Juniper come along. That dude is the only mf in this season that didn’t get fucked over

Is this one-by-one dialogue about another character’s traits going to be a thing? I’m already sick of it

Somewhat. That’s the new name. Why couldn’t they go with the standard Socks or Blue or Kai or insert other silly common nb name here. Do you know how difficult it’s going to be making that sound natural?

I genuinely am uncomfortable at this reunion. Ruby’s incredibly emotional but Somewhat is just kinda there. Reminds me way too much of meeting someone who knew me as a kid and get way too intimate because of that (it happened a lot since my grams raised like. half the town back in the day) Did they really just throw this in to throw it in? What’s the point of this deeply creepy scene other than answering the question of “what happened to Little?”

Nooo bring Juniper with you!!! They’re the only good character!!!

Hold hands and jump at the same time. Reach the ground at different times. Aight

So the gods were originally Afterans? “The tree’s earliest blossoms.” That raises so many fucking questions: how did Remnant come to be if it’s an entirely separate dimension(?) from Wonderland? What connects the two? Are the entities in the relics Afterans as well? If so, are they in the relics willingly? Were they created by the brothers or the tree? Does this make the tree the source of all life as they know it? What powers the tree? If Wonderland goes to shit, will that affect Remnant and any other playgrounds the brothers or other gods might have made?

These mfs really using Mr Monty’s words to justify their shitty god tier writing?

Why did the brothers build modern human houses for the animal creatures instead of creature specific housing (a dam for beavers, a nest for birds, etc)? This seems to be early stages of life so I don’t think you need to delve straight into Craftsman architecture

The jabber origin is so dumb. These idiot brothers tried to design a lawnmower and made Jason Voorhees Also, that doesn’t even make sense. Wonderland is a self contained ecosystem where all energy essentially gets recycled. The jabber disrupts that by permanently ending whoever it gets its chompers on. This would make more sense if we saw new life coming in, but so far it seems like all the tree creations happened back in the day and everything now is a brother creation. Since we’ve yet to see any evidence of their return, this means that there is a finite amount of life in Wonderland, meaning that the jabber, given enough time, could end all life within because it has no other purpose and no counterbalancing force Though, since Neo killed(?) the jabber, does this mean there is no force working for or against the living in Wonderland? Seriously, what the fuck is going to happen here?

“True balance requires only love and the patience to see things through to the end.” Tell me you’re begging for a v10 greenlight without telling me you’re begging for a v10 greenlight That’s not even remotely true because balance, especially among the sentient, requires EFFORT and COOPERATION. Or did y’all already forget your “trust in love” season got people murdered?

LITTLE DIDN’T EVEN FUCKING DO ANYTHING JFC THEY WERE SEXY LAMPING THE WHOLE SEASON

Jaune is young again. Many shocking. Much wow

“When you are needed most.” It better be in that fucking desert y’all dumped two whole ass cities in with only like. 4 trained warriors against a horde of grimm in a sandstorm

Nope! That would’ve been too straining on the budget much of a downer to end on. Still shot of Sepia - I mean, Vacuo and that’s it! Show’s over, folks!

I can’t discern a single word but I like the ending song lol

THESE MFS REALLY ADVERTISING THE JL CROSSOVER AFTER THE EP OHMYGODDDDDDDDD

#rwde #suicide mention tw #I truly have no words for this lmao #i am exhausted #hope you fucking burn rt #and may your cult fanatics burn with you

[writingquestionsanswered]

Hello! I don't usually have a problem with pacing but I noticed that I've had this particular issue in similar scenes in different stories. So basically, something traumatic happenned to X character, they move on, time goes by, and at a certain point something reminds them of the traumatic situation and they break down crying, usually while someone is there to hold them. I've.. been there, it happens out of a sudden, without any warning, and the crying feels endless. Now, I can't seem to be able to write that same feeling down. I think have a good grasp with exposition, but it doesn't feel like I have to throw that in while this other VERY BIG emotion is overwhelming the character. Same with description. Also, I get that this is the way I understand it and there's clearly something wrong with it because when I reread it feels like something is missing. So basically, and to summarize, how do I make crying scenes feel longer? (Because saying "they cried for a few minutes and slowly calmed down" sounds awful.)

Making Breakdown Scene Feel Longer

Fiction writing is comprised of three elements:

-- Exposition (explaining, describing, character thought) -- Action (character movement, things happening) -- Dialogue (characters talking)

Every scene is a balance of exposition, action, and dialogue.

So, when it comes to pacing a scene, those are your choices. If you want to make a scene longer, you need to add more exposition, more action, and more dialogue.

If you want to make a crying scene actually feel long (without saying "they cried for a few minutes") you need to add more of those three things. For example:

Exposition: what are the characters thinking while this scene is taking place? What do they feel? What do they notice about each others body language and facial expressions? What do they notice about their own internal sensations? What observations do they make about what's happening and how do those make them feel? What sensory things do they notice about the other person, about themselves, and about the environment? (For example, to illustrate time passing, you could illustrate the light changes in the room or have a character notice it's getting late.)

Action: what are some ways the characters can move around during this scene? Body language, gestures, facial expressions, interaction with each other, interaction with the environment... What are some things that can happen not initiated by the two characters? (For example, the cat jumps up in the lap of the crying character. They're interrupted by a pizza delivery. Fireworks start to go off in the dark city skyline outside the window...)

Dialogue: what are some things these characters can say in this scene? To one another, out loud to themselves, to another character who shows up briefly, or perhaps on a phone call.

One more thing...

If a character is having a breakdown related to a past trauma, you might consider working brief flashbacks of the trauma into this scene as sort of a fourth element. You probably wouldn't want to start the crying scene and then go into a long flashback (although you could have a long flashback kick-off the breakdown...) but you could dip in and out of the comfort scene as this character recalls little bits and pieces, perhaps even while relaying them to the other character. It might not work for the scene you're writing, but it's something to consider.

I hope that helps!

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[fuckyouozai]

i just feel like so many scripts of Big Projects lately like....just need another once-over. a little bit more refinement. there were so many small changes in aang and katara's dialogue that could've been made to make everything feel a little bit more real and natural. you could tell ian ousley (boooo) was ad libbing because he had the best dialogue! zuko sold it cuz he mostly just yelled and hissed at people. i think maybe the american accents might be throwing me off too, we're so used to british accents in old timey fantasy worlds that everything feels weird in amewican. there was also that obviously canadian guy going "what's with his markings" which was funny

overall ep 1 i'd give it maybe a 6/10. this is as opposed to the first 3 eps of atla the series which are a masterclass in exposition 10/10

#lucy liveblogs natla