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pixelchills · 8 days

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Chill's ramblings about the DCA fandom and personal feelings and issues towards TSAMS (both positive an negative):

(I'm writing this like an essay but treating it like a diary, so if I jump from subject to another, it is because I am just typing as the thoughts hit my head. Sorry for being so wordy.)

I simply feel like I need to write my thoughts down, so why not share them with you. Maybe you can validate my feelings or something, I don't know.

Intro:

So, oof, I got a fic rec from @thedenofravenpuff and I'm loving it so much I really wanna draw fan art for it...

But the problem is that it's a TSAMS fanfic and I've sworn to my name I'll never draw anything related to the show because that will make me engage with a part of the fandom I'm not comfortable with.

My biggest issue with TSAMS:

I have such complicated feelings towards the show and its fanbase and I do not wish to make my life and work more difficult because of it as it already is.

My own work and characters are already constantly being compared to TSAMS. When I first introduced Solar to my fic, he was constantly being referred to Eclipse from TSAMS. Now that the show had a character with THE SAME NAME, it has been even worse.

Dolldrop Moon has been compared to Lunar. Even though the dolldrops existed before the youtube channel was even created (and Lunar made his debut much later).

The biggest issue I've had has always been the fanbase, that takes the show as the canon for Sun and Moon from FNAF and uses it as an excuse to harass shippers like me because they think Sun and Moon are brothers.

I've first handedly seen the damage the fanbase has done to some of my friends who draw, or have previously drawn art for the show besides their own AUs and personal headcanons of Sun and Moon as lovers. I'm sorry to tag you, but @kriimhild and @fablekitty : I've seen how the immature side of the show's fans have treated you, I am so terribly sorry you've had to defend yourselves over and over again for things that were not meant to be mixed up.

I have posted some ideas of a possible Animutant Moon and Sun forming a polyamorous relationship with Solar in the future of "My Dear Daffodil" on my personal/adult Twitter account. Someone kept commenting on my posts that I was glorifying incest, because Sun and Moon were brothers and Solar was their cousin.

The post had "Animutant" in it. Not "TSAMS". These comments came from a person saying they were 19 in their profile. So it's not just kids who can't tell not every fanwork is about TSAMS. It's starting to be some adults too.

Vice versa I've had another person comment on my very clearly SFW Twitter how they're following me because I am an adult artist who draws TSAMS incest. I have never drawn TSAMS art. I ship Sun and Moon, but they're never related with family bond, because I love presenting them as lovers.

Why I ship Sun and Moon:

Because I am a hopeless romantic. I love romantic love. Every single story I write is always about love.

The only exception to this is the Poppy Playtime comic I am doing. But even then, I was originally planning for a romantic love between Dogday and the Player. Yet, I decided to leave it, and keep the relationship open for any type of representation the reader themselves will prefer.

I used to watch The Sun and Moon Show when it first started airing. I loved their playthroughs. I had a big distaste for them calling each other brothers, as well as some of the first "lore" videos they had. My biggest issue at the time was how Moon treated Sun, though. As someone who grew up with an abusive sibling, it sometimes just hit a bit too hard at home.

But it got better after Eclipse and Lunar appeared. Moon was more caring, and I started to really like his character development. There was one episode where Sun explained to Lunar that he and Moon had simply just "decided" to be brothers, despite not having a canonical relationship.

This actually made me really happy. Because the Old Moon was aroace, the love he felt was simply never meant to be romantic, but platonic. And by making Sun his brother by choice clearly indicated that Sun was always the one he loved the most - in a way that was suitable for aromantic person like him.

And it really made me enjoy the show for a while. Sun is my favourite character, and despite not always liking the way the show presents him, I always feel so much love for him, no matter the AU he is in. So I loved that Moon loved him more than anything, even if it was just platonic. Because I've always been under the impression that the canon Moon loves Sun, and is only under a virus to protect him. For me, the best part of any Sun and Moon AU is to know that Sun is the most important thing to Moon.

Why I stopped watching TSAMS:

And then that Moon I had really started to like, who loved Sun more than anyone else but just platonically, died.

It hurt so much I simply stopped watching the show. I've watched a few episodes here and there after that, but I am having a hard time liking the show the same as I did before.

Partially it's because of the fanbase. Partially it's because I don't find the lore very interesting and some of the stuff a bit repetitive. Partially it's because I am scared to see Sun eventually crumble up into madness, because he has been through so much.

I like the New Moon. He is funny and nice, what I've seen. His relationship with Solar has been interesting, and I genuinely hoped they would've been able to take the romantic route after Moon said he wasn't sure if he was aroace anymore. But as I said, I've only watched a few episodes after the old Moon died, so I don't know either of their characters that much to form any strong opinions about them. I just listen to the Monty and Puppet podcast once in a while and get a little inside to some of the lore that has been happening.

But hey, at least there's fanfics. Which is why I am rambling here today.

Fanfics:

It is a rare treat to find Sun x Moon fanfics that aren't simply just porn, or do not include reader inserts. So since my romance-filled brain needed something to fill the void, I've started reading some TSAMS fics with romance (that wasn't between Sun & Moon) and plot in them.

I know Solar was settled to be a "cousin" to the weird family tree of TSAMS. But I simply crave for Solar and New Moon to be at least queerplatonic. Solar is not from their dimension, no matter how much they decide they're 'cousins' it doesn't make him their real cousin or relative because they're not from the same world.

Sun and Moon are brothers but they technically gave birth to Eclipse, who then created Lunar so Eclipse is technically Lunar's parent and then brother and Lunar is Sun and Moon's brother and... do you see what I'm trying to say?

The family tree is so complicated that I don't think I'm a horrible person for shipping Moon and Solar and reading fics about them. Tell me if I am wrong though.

The FIC that is making me question everything:

So Puffy recommended this fic by @theinfamousdoctorf , "Eclipse Meets His Match".

I'm currently on chapter 40, and I am genuinely surprised how much I am liking this fic so far. It got everything; redemption and character growth, the representation of Sun as the good, glowing angel he is in my mind (for canon, and every AU. He is always perfect in my eyes I love him can you tell lol), slow-burn romance, drama, excitment, plot, jokes and funny moments... even if there are a lot of mentions of sex and sexual pleasure, it doesn't feel out of the place as there is so much more to it too.

Eclipse's redemption to become better and realising he is in love with Sun has been so interesting to follow. Sun deserves the love. I love when Sun is getting loved. I literally ship him with every other animatronic in the games and love it when people ship him with their self-inserts and OCs. Because I love him so much I want him to be loved in every possible universe he is in.

Even bigger bonus to this fic is the second pairing, Solar and Moon, which I already opened up about above. I don't know how much the fic is truthful to the canon lore of the show, but I wish to pretend this fic is the canon now /hj.

I love the characters and how they're written. I love the descriptions of their flaws and hopes and dreams. How vulnerable they can get. How closely they stick together. And as an appreciation for making me tearful and excited about fanfiction in such a long time, I would hope to be able to gift the author some fan art for their fic.

But I've sworn to not draw anything for the show. For my own good. I've got too many awful comments already from the fans of the show despite never doing any art for it. I am just scared it will turn things worse.

End words:

I don't know if creating a new alias would be the right choice. So my main name/account would be spared from the confusion that the show's fans seem to stirr into, where one tsams artwork turns all of the artist' work into tsams.

I don't care if the art style would be recognisible. The artist would be me, but not PixelChills. Just so I could gift something to the author of this fic that is currently saving me from the boredom of being unable to write my own.

Thank you.

(This text has been typed on my phone, so pardon for any typos).

-Chill

#pixel talks #rambles #tsams #fic rec #essay #sorry my head is simply just confused

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leonscape · 2 months

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i feel like we all perceive the suitors differently based on who we are and idk why or what compelled me to make this post but i’m sharing anyways

i’ve seen people hc sexualities and i feel like i have a unique view because im ace but i also don’t call characters gay just because? i have never developed feelings for anyone nor do i participate in discussions about who’s hot and who’s not. im kinda not wired that way so i feel like that makes my perspective different.

i think it’s interesting when people call the suitors gay and ship them because they’re actually straight, meant for a female audience. it’s not heterosexual content and i think it really comes down to how the characters are written, and the type of person viewing the characters.

disclaimer: this is my opinion you do not have to agree with it, but i do ask you to be respectful. you do not need to argue your opinion or against mine so let’s keep it chill

okay let’s start ^_^

jin is straight there’s literally no arguing this one. his love of women is very intense but he’s just being one of the bros unapologetically? i think everyone can agree on this one.

chevalier hear me out is ace. i bet he’s the type to read erotica with a straight face and it truly is for the plot. it doesn’t bother him and he doesn’t pay attention to that kind of thing. if we take out the otome aspect out of ikepri, he’d just be aroace fr. and i think this way because he tells emma to prove that romance and love has worth. so i don’t see him attracted to men and i don’t think he’s attracted to women either he just falls in love with emma because she’s the beauty to his beast romance?

clavis probably is also ace, gray ace. in my post about ace hc’s i said he’s probably ace and im pretty sure that was before his route came out and now after having played it, i still stand by that. i think sexual attraction isn’t important to clavis. i think he’s more worried about abandonment and figuring out if this person is his ride or die kind of person. i just think his priorities are different and maybe that’s why it seems like he comes off as ace. i do not see him being attracted to men.

leon is straight. maybe it’s jin’s influence and i see them as very similar. maybe it’s purely just my perception of him. i have heard that some people think his bi because everyone is charmed by him? but i just don’t see him reciprocating that kind of preference to guys. i think he also has a hard time reciprocating energy towards women too. idk i guess i imagined him talking to a nice girl, everything’s going well, but his stomach drops as he reminds himself that he’s a fake. he doesn’t let people get too close to him otherwise he will get eaten alive by the guilt from deceiving them but he’s also afraid to tell them. i mean how is he supposed to tell his partner when he hasn’t told his closest brothers? the brothers that he’s grown up with and grown close to? i also just think he’d be enthusiastic about being a dad and starting a family because he didn’t know his parents and he didn’t even have the luxury of having leon’s parents either so i think it would mean a lot to him to start a family and give his kids a mom and a dad. wait this isn’t a post about just leon i got carried away oops but does this mean i think leon is ace? nah he’s just afraid that his insecurity in his identity will damage the relationships he has and the illusion of leon.

yves is ace i don’t care what they say his spicy content feels very performative and fan service-y to me. i said he’s ace in my ace hc post too so i still stand by that. he gets embarrassed when he talks about it so i don’t think he’s really comfortable in his sexuality? me personally i project onto yves just a bit?? like im just gonna say that desire does not equal sexual attraction because i get confused and uncomfortable about it sometimes so i have to remind myself. i think he wants to participate in those types of acts but feels conflicted. also i know he’s the resident femboy and that’s more likely to get him labeled as gay or something but i actually don’t see him being into men but we know he’s an ally from that one bond story of his.

licht, i swear im not doing this on purpose because of my own biases, but he’s ace too bro. he doesn’t really pay attention to sexuality and attraction and stuff. or maybe the more traumatized or mentally ill they are the more i think they’re ace. wait that’s not true i’ll get to nokto after this. yeah idk licht is depressed af so he don’t have time to think “mmh men” or “mmh women” or “mmmhh both” there’s no attraction until after he established a relationship so yeah i guess he’s demisexual.

nokto is gay. okay fine i’ll say bi. weeell ok not naming names but kinda because it’s a small fandom and it’s not hard to figure out. but my perception of him has definitely been influenced by fandom. now i just think he likes men

luke is honestly i don’t know i guess he’s straight. he doesn’t do sus things and he just seems like what jin was like before his addiction to breasts and to “the sand in the hourglass” (assuming jin wasn’t always a pervert like that).

i do not have enough information on gilbert

keith is straight you cannot tell me he wouldn’t have a wife and 10 kids if he was born a commoner. he’d be a farmer just plowing the fields, growing medicinal plants, and providing for his family. he just seems like a straight up guy (see what i did there) making an honest living and obeying his wife who is in charge of the household.

silvio is another straight guy. attracted to women but doesn’t want to be because his money attracts the wrong kind of women.

rio also straight he’s probably only attracted to emma actually so yeah i know we joke about it but i think this guy really just only likes emma

finishing off the list strong with my sariel ace hc. yeah he’s giving the “i’m too busy with work/school” ace tbh. he’s like the professional guy that ignores the flirting but every once in a while it does affect him if he’s interested. but i don’t think he experiences much attraction and maybe he doesn’t have time either?

#will delete this later if ppl don’t reblog #i’m tired

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batmanisagatewaydrug · 4 months

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cw: mentions of fatphobia, body image issues, gendered beauty standards

hey sex witch! love and appreciate your sex ed posts and the resources you've shared. i noticed that you've answered some asks about becoming more comfortable with expressing sexual attraction, and finding ways to see yourself as desirable -- i was wondering if you had any similar thoughts about becoming more comfortable with other people expressing attraction to you, especially verbally. it's something i'd really like to start enjoying in a casual way (i'm more okay with it within a long-term relationship or a kink dynamic, partly because it's something i can negotiate), but it's pretty consistently something that feels "off" for me and kills my interest. i don't want to react that way! i actively want to enjoy it, especially with people i otherwise like and connect with, and i feel like i might enjoy it a lot someday if the circumstances were right or if i changed my mindset/framing. plus, i know that i really like complimenting people i'm attracted to (if i know that they like it and i know what it means to them), and i'd like that to be a mutual thing.

to be clear, i haven't experienced sexual trauma, i'm nondysphoric (transmasc), and i'd say that i really like my appearance (in a nonsexual/aesthetic sense), so i think i can rule out a few of the common reasons that people feel this way. others have suggested that i might be aspec/demisexual when i've talked about my experiences, but i've gone through that particular questioning process before (and identified as aroace/"not interested" for most of my life), and i feel like it's probably something else.

i think a significant part of the problem is that when people have flirted with me/said that i'm physically attractive, they've usually referenced beauty standards that i'm both very opposed to and which are at odds with my sexuality and what i see as beautiful. i'm a guy who's always been viewed as thin and as having a "conventionally androgynous" (?) body type, and i've generally been attracted to people with body types and/or presentations that are noticeably different from mine -- that includes feminine-presenting people, fat and chubby people, and trans and gnc people who present in ways that combine masculinity and femininity. i've pretty much never been attracted to men who look like me. but when people compliment me on my appearance, they often compliment my body type or size directly or indirectly, and i feel like there's a certain undertone of "i'm labeling you as attractive because you don't look like Those People." i don't want to be around that attitude, and i don't find it flattering or "nice."

i generally wouldn't want to assume that a person who uses these compliments actually has extremely normative views on sex, is fatphobic, etc., and i believe that attraction is morally neutral no matter what your "type" is. it's not like i don't have specific preferences myself, though i probably have some biases that i'm not yet aware of. the whole idea of people being attracted to you because of aspects of your appearance that you didn't choose is...inherently messy, i think. i also know that in most cases, i can just leave, or ask people not to talk about me in these terms. but i still find the whole thing alienating and off-putting, to such an extent that i feel disconnected from most discussions and portrayals of sexuality, especially re: attraction to men. and that's on top of having to deal with the very common assumption that it's a universal experience for women and trans people to hate their bodies and want certain types of validation (but that's kind of a separate issue that i won't get into here).

do you have any thoughts on how to navigate this? i feel like i might be missing something important, but maybe i just need to understand and accept what doesn't work for me.

thanks!

hi anon,

I hate to be so brief when you've presented me with a veritable novella, but listen: you've already answered your own question here.

if I'm reading this right sounds like what you're experiencing isn't an issue of disliking compliments because you lack self esteem, but disliking compliments that are focusing on your body in ways that you don't enjoy. the problem in this scenario really isn't on your end. no matter how well-meaning people might be, you're not under any obligation to make yourself enjoy compliments that make you uneasy, and I'm certainly not going to be the person who tries to tell you how considering I operate my own life almost entirely around the notion that if it sucks, one must hit da bricks ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

you already said it yourself: if you don't like the way someone talks to you, especially if they're someone you'd like to continue having a relationship and building rapport with, the best move is to ask them not to talk about you that way. (if they're someone you'll never see again and don't give a shit about, by all means just blow it off.) if they're not cool with that boundary, awesome! you've learned something very important about them and can terminate that potential relationship immediately.

#sex edventures 2023

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charliethedino-12 · 1 year

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LGBTQ+ Gotham Headcanons

My gender, pronoun, and sexuality headcanons for Gotham characters.

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Harvey Bullock - Cisgender, He/Him, Gay.

The GCPD isn't an accepting or supportive place to work so he sleeps with women to protect himself. He's trying so hard to come off as straight. I mean, he and Scottie were engaged within less than a year of being together. I headcanon Fish as his beard. He wants to kiss Jim so badly.

Oswald Cobblepot - Transgender FTM, He/Him, Gay, and Asexual.

He would be offended and confused if you thought he was straight. Oswald is very open about his identity and will beat the shit out of you for misgendering him. He doesn't care about sex but is fine engaging in it if his partner (Ed) wants to. Gertrude was the most supportive person ever and always gave Oswald unconditional love. When he was younger all he really wanted was to be a boy when he grew up.

Jonathan Crane - Transgender FTM, He/They, Gay, Demromantic and Asexual.

He knew he was a boy from a very young age. Realised he didn't mind using they/them when he was a teenager and started to use both he/him and they/them. He thought he was gay early on because of his lack of interest in girls but started to question if he was aroace when he got older. They realised they were demiromantic when he grew a crush on his best friend at the time.

Harvey Dent - Cisgender, He/Him, Bisexual.

I think he has a preference for women but only slightly. Definitely uses his two-headed coin to flirt with people and it actually works more often than not. Knew he was bi from a young age.

Ecco - Cisgender, She/Her, Lesbian.

She and Jeremiah are in a queerplatonic relationship. She could get a girlfriend if she really wanted but isn't interested at the moment. The most dedicated girlfriend you could ever have. Falls hard. Had an 'oh fuck' moment in high school when she realised she was a lesbian.

Sofia Falcone - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.

Strikes me as someone who isn't focused on romance or sex but could get a boyfriend or girlfriend if she put time and effort into it. I think she has a preference for women.

Lucius Fox - Cisgender, He/Him, Gay.

Acts cool but is probably a gay disaster on the inside. Tries to flirt and is semi-successful when he does. Says he's too busy with work to find a boyfriend and is slightly lonely. Doesn't try to hide his sexuality and has no problem telling people he's gay.

Victor Fries - Cisgender, He/Him, Bisexual.

Preference for men. He isn't that open about his sexuality but still acts surprised when no one knows he's bisexual. Is very casual about it. I see him as a very quiet and respectful person when showing his attraction to both men and women and just prefers keeping his feelings to himself.

Nora Fries - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.

No real preference for either men or women. Would try and flirt with women but it would be seen as something platonic. She and Victor had matching pride shirts.

Tabitha Galavan - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.

Preference for women. I like to think the first person she murdered was a homophobe. Could pull any man or woman she wanted and no one can convince me otherwise. She either just kills any person who is homophobic or transphobic in her presence or beats the shit out of them as Oswald does.

Butch Gilzean - Cisgender, He/Him, Straight

Raised with respect. The two most important women in his life, Fish and Tabitha, were bisexual so he is very much an ally. Type of guy to tell somebody off for making an offensive comment, verbally or physically. He, Tabitha and Barbara were in a polyamorous relationship.

Jim Gordon - Cisgender, He/Him, Bisexual.

Preference for women. Growing up he had some internalized homophobia but he overcame it as he got older. He falls for any pretty girl who ever so slightly flirts with him. I think he likes men who are either mean with a soft side or just a bit of a bastard(Harvey and Oswald). He and Harvey are both in love with each other but are just too stupid to admit it to one another.

Barbara Kean - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.

Male preference. Had some internalized homophobia until she killed her parents and became free. Went to an all-girls school where she had a few girlfriends before getting in trouble for dating other women. Probably pegged Jim.

Kristen Kringle - Cisgender, She/Her, Omnisexual, Greyromantic.

Male preference. To me, she only showed sexual attraction towards her boyfriends before Ed, even then I think she and Ed would've been better off as friends. She very rarely experiences romantic attraction but when she does I think she'd be a little awkward about it. Kristen definitely pegged Ed. She and Lee would've been cute together. They're very dear to my heart.

Selina Kyle - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual, Demiromantic.

Female preference. She's had crushes on both Ivy and Bridgit. Acts like she's annoyed by her loved ones but would kill and die for them. She's protective and caring even if she denies it. Has only had romantic feelings for her friends. She has trouble admitting her romantic feelings for people. Barbara and Tabitha are her badass bi mentors.

Fish Mooney - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.

No preference. Flirts with everyone. Doesn't tolerate anyone's homophobic bullshit. The biggest eyerolls. The greatest gaydar in all of Gotham city. One look at Oswald and Harvey and she knew they were both lonely little gay men. Harvey's beard.

Edward Nygma - Transgender FTM, Genderfluid, He/She/They, Bisexual.

Preference for women. The king of internalized homophobia. His whole arc in the show was him denying his bisexuality and feelings for Oswald. The Riddler is sick of Ed's compulsory heterosexuality. Hated his female body and started to transition during uni. Ed was comfortable having a male body but didn't understand why he was only sometimes comfortable being seen and referred to as a man. This led to him discovering that he was genderfluid as an adult. Never told anyone until Oswald and only become open about his gender identity after he and the Riddler became whole in s3. The worst at flirting but simultaneously the sweetest.

Alfred Pennyworth - Cisgender, He/Him, Straight

Does his best for Bruce. And I mean does. Biggest ally you'll ever meet. If anybody bullies his boy for who he is be prepared to be slapped the fuck out of. All he wants is for Bruce to be safe and happy and if Alfred has to teach somebody a lesson in respect, so be it.

Ivy Pepper - Cisgender, She/Her, Lesbian.

Disaster lesbian. Had a fat crush on Selina when she was younger, and still does though slightly less. Her feelings have pivoted more towards Bridgit. The original plant lesbian. Oswald is her disaster gay role model. Expert in the language of flowers and gives personalised bouquets to her crushes.

Bridgit Pike - Demigirl, She/They, Lesbian.

Oblivious to people's interest in her. She never really got the chance to explore any romantic interest they had with the women in her life before being burned due to her home life. She doesn't really know how to deal with romantic or sexual feelings. They never really fully felt like a girl and felt that there was something else to them. So the use of they/them and she/her pronouns felt natural to Bridgit.

Jervis Tetch - Cisgender, He/Him, Biromantic, Demisexual.

Male preference. Had a fucking heart attack when he had his first male crush. He had no idea what to do. Felt so guilty about it. He's just kinda pushed his bisexuality down. He started to accept his bisexuality as he got older and fully accepted himself by the time Alice died. I see him as someone who thinks sex is intimate and I think he'd only want to perform sexual acts with a partner who he'd found a real bond with. Thinks he is really romantic but his lack of romantic experience says otherwise.

Alice Tetch - Cisgender, She/Her, Lesbian.

I don't know why I think this, I just do. It's just the impression she gave me. She and Bridgit could've been arson girlfriends. Always knew she was gay just never got the chance to have a girlfriend.

Leslie Thompkins - Cisgender, She/Her, Pansexual.

Growing up, she didn't really understand why gender was a big deal to some people, if somebody was attractive they were attractive, why did it matter? At university, she discovered what the term pansexual meant and realised that it fit her perfectly. Has three types, dark and badass (Jim and Barbara), sweet and adorable (Kristen) or a mix of the two (Ed).

Valerie Vale - Cisgender, She/Her, Bisexual.

Male preference. Flirts with her sources all the time. She and Lee gave me some gay vibes honestly. Nothing is more romantic than teaching your boyfriend's ex how to lock pick when trying to escape from her own home and a crazy man in a tophat.

Jerome Valeska - Cisgender, He/Him, Bisexual.

Chaotic bisexual with no preference. Flirts with almost everybody. Used to bully Jeremiah for being gay (not severely just little comments) and then cried when he had his first male crush when he was little. He's perfectly happy and open with his sexuality now, he was just a homophobic little shit instead of a gay little shit when he was really small. Never been in a real romantic relationship before so he's useless when it comes to real romance.

Jeremiah Valeska - Cisgender, He/Him, Gay.

Disaster gay. Always knew he was gay. Used to watch male guests at the circus from behind the trailers. Jerome made fun of him for it until he had his gay panic and joined him. Can't flirt for shit but tries his best. Touch starved. Kinda lonely. As I've said before he and Ecco are in a queerplatonic relationship.

Bruce Wayne - Transgender FTM, He/Him, Bisexual

Preference for women. Started to transition at the start of s2. Felt wrong being in the body of a girl since he was very little. The only therapist he's been to is a gender therapist from outside of Gotham. He's just a little sweetheart. He does his best to impress his crushes. Overall, he's just doing his best to cope with his romantic feelings for people (Selina). I like the idea of Jim and Lucius being his older queer role models.

Victor Zsasz - Cisgender, He/Him, Pansexual.

He just doesn't care what somebody's gender is. If you're hot you're hot and he's going to flirt with you. Very blunt when admitting his sexual and physical attraction. Difficult to decipher if he's into you or if he wants to annoy the fuck out of you when it comes to his romantic pursuits. Breaks into his crush's houses and does shit like drink all their milk. Clingy.

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What do you think of my headcanons, do you agree or disagree? Let me know! :)

I apologize for any mistakes, I'm dyslexic so proofreading is difficult.

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aroaceconfessions · 1 year

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(cw: mild discussion of trauma, possible aphobia?)

i don't actually know if i'm aroace. the idea of being touched in any context makes me ill. i get worked up into a panic at the idea of anyone having romantic interest in me. i've been in relationships before, but it never worked out bscause i couldn't give them what they wanted. i couldn't pretend i loved them. everyone i try to professionally talk about this with says that i'm just exhibiting a trauma response and that i'll "find my person some day". i want to believe them, but given everything i've dealt with i don't think i can. could i even call myself aroace if trauma made me this way? i can recognize when someone is attractive, and i'd even say i have a preference for a certain type of person, but being in a relationship with someone? being touched by someone even in a non-sexual context? out of the question.

idk i'm just having a Moment, and i wanted to share in case anyone else feels this way.

Submitted April 23, 2023

#aromantic #asexual #aroace #aspec #aro #ace #arospec #acespec #arose #touch averse #questioning

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fictiontbh · 5 months

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Haii!

I felt like I should make an intro-post for myself, so, I suppose this will be a huge masterlist of alot of things... so here's my introduction and everything about me!

Feel free to ask as much questions as you'd like! You can ask me through my inbox (as an anon or not) or through my DM's (direct messages) If you would like to keep your questions between you and me!

With that said....

More under cut <3

Tags!

Currently, I've been wanting to sort my posts, from og posts, art, and everything like that. It just makes it easier to search for things I want when I want. Currently my only tag is #TBH's art I chose that because my name changes alot... but my autism persists so... yeah that exists. If I ever get around to actually finishing my fics then the tag #TBH's fanfics will be coloured down on this list.

Sexuality/gender!

I am an Aroace Lesbian who is along the nonbinary spectrum! I prefer masc terms, dressing femme, and mixing up pronouns!!

Here are my flags!!

Questions are allowed!

Names!

My name is Storm(y) but I also go by Charm and Fiction. I go by she/they/he/ it!!

The reason I go by multiple names is due to me having been on the internet for... since I was born, practically.

Both of these names have a special place in my heart, though Charm has more of an explanation and Fiction is what I prefer to be named online.

The name "Stormy" comes from my middle name which is just the word Storm. It holds no significance more than just me disliking my birth name and chosing my middle name felt like it would be easier on those who do know me. I have also used this name on a self insert I made of me (not for me, of me. Trust me it is very different to make a self-insert that was made in your image than one you made just to project onto.)

"Charm", however, was a name i fell in love with because I am apart of the Fnaf Fandom. This name was made for a "self-insert" oc i made for satire, the thing is, I ended up expanding the OC's lore so much, but since it was "self-insert" I guess I just stopped taking it as a joke when my brain hyperfixated on the OC. The name has applied to me only because I still consider that OC a "self-insert", truly made for my Indulgence.

"Fiction" is my last name, no, not my actual last name, just my last preffered name. Fiction was another self indulgent name I made for another OC, this was made during a time of major depression where I would spend my day projecting onto my characters and enjoying parasocial relationships with them. Its not a name that means anything good, but this is the reason I use the internet, so I kept it.

I have said above that Fiction is my preffered name online, yet I would truly be fine and maybe happier if you do use my other names as well, especially for more lighthearted conversations. My names may change depending on the circumstance.

Also, I have certain personal depending on the name, Storm is what I draw most commonly as I based the design off myself truly, Charm is technically a furry, but like, robot.... fnaf. Thats my only explanation. Fnaf like Freddy. Except its a fox. Idk. Uhm. Fiction doesn't have a design, but they have alot of emotions behind her, so I'll probably draw them but she is gonna change... alot. No depiction of them is gonna stay the same. Ever.

In conclusion:

Storm is just a name I use for convenience and with family/close friends and in a way that connects to me as a person.

Charm is a name I use for self indulgence purposes and for happier/lighthearted conversations.

Fiction is the name I chose to express my thoughts and is used in a more depressing/serious type of conversation.

These names will switch alot however, sometimes storm or fiction will be the self-indulgent ones, sometimes Fiction will actually be happy and not just my "damn, depressive episode!!" name, sometimes my names will just have no meaning but usually I feel I prefer them during specific circumstances. Plus... sometimes I might find a new name I like for a bit and sometimes ill try testing out a new name.. ice been thinking Mimic for a bit and the name Allen has crossed my mind a few times... but for now sticking with the names above would probably be best.

My personality, what I choose to indulge in, and the thoughts in my head are different from eachother and I suppose my brain liked using the names to show and express myself in a more... disassociative way. Just blame it on past trauma and parasocial relationships I've been in.

Speaking of trauma...

Diagnosis'

I have Social/General Anxiety Disorder, Sociopathy and Minor Depression. I am also Autistic which attributes to alot of my other mental disorders and just myself as a person. (As stated before with Autigender)

I may still be undiagnosed so this list may update, and my only main guesses for what else i could have would probably be ocd and odd but... you never know right? I mean, i discover new paraphilias that i go "hmm... interesting..." to every... not every day but pretty often!! Im not technically a paraphiliac? I don't get aroused. At all. Ever. But I do get very interested. A new interest but not something I care for and actively search. Unless it's comships... love those.

I do not have a way to Segway into my interests smoothly so pretend that this is a really cool line that relates to my-

Interests

I have a LOT of interests.

FNAF, OMORI/おもり, Vocaloid, Evillious Chronicles, ONIBI/鬼火, Pokémon, Be More Chill, ATL:A, Hazbin/Helluva, Steven Universe, Saiki K No Psi Nan and then my scattered interests that are just... its just me liking random characters from random franchises. The franchises im not a fan of but one (1) character? Hell ye im into them!! They are... silly... so silly... recently BMC has been stuck on my mind and o CANNOT get rid of it... have I been squipped???

Shipping!

I am a multishipper. I ship almost every ship in every Fandom and I do not care what others ship. Will I judge? Yeah. Will I truly care? Never! This counts me as a "Pro-shipper" though in technicality im actually full comship. I do not care what you ship. Just as long as you DONT support people who actually and actively support or participate in abusive relationships IRL I am okay with you. From the most innocent cutesy ships to absolutely vile ones I support. Hence my squipemy ship...

I would also like to add, Kinks and anything sexual is allowed on this blog, just a reminder however if I get uncomfortable with the sexual tension in my asks, comment/replies, or anything im tagged in I will most likely not respond or delete what I can. I'm not sex repulsed, but I have boundaries for certain people and my way of showing affection/intimacy with them.

I suppose having said this... all thats left is a DNI list? Its a little basic, cause I really don't care. At all. Just have the basics.

DNI (Do not interact)

Pedophiles/Maps (POCD is fine! You can't control that and all that matters is you surpressing these urges. I can't even lie, I've had the thoughts too, its not pleasant and I'm sorry for your stigmatisation. You are welcome here.)

Rapists and rape defenders. (There is no excuse.)

Anti-LGBT/homo-or-transphobes (you are on tumblr. How could you dislike gay people. This was basically made for gay people. What.)

Anti-shippers. (Please I use shipping as a way of coping. My trauma is different from yours. My coping mechanisms are different than yours. Why do you get mad abt that. Its not a harmful coping mechanism. It doesn't hurt me or you or anybody else.)

Ableists. (There is no excuse.)

Racists. (There is no excuse.)

Radqueer. (... I dont like saying this but just.... no. You aren't welcome in the community. Xenogenders and neos are allowed here! Not you however.)

And thats the criteria. I told you. Its basic. I don't care who you are. I just want to know that I am in a place with people of my kind- mentally ill, bullied, nerds, geeks, whatevers, LGBT community, etc. Or just people who wont actively try and harm me, both mentally and physically. This has been my introduction, and I suppose.. I bit you adieu!

Goodbye! Thank you so much for listening~!

#fandoms #intro post #introduction #meet the blogger #TBH's art

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cowardlybean · 10 months

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your ask button is so tiny it’s so funny

anywho ask game mob psycho fucking all the questions. all of them. i didn’t even read it just answer them all i wanna know

This is gonna be a long ass post :3

the character everyone gets wrong: Tome is a speculative biology enjoyer. thats it thats the post! I also feel like Teruki is more violent than people portray him

a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom: I’mmmm not answering this (cannot decide a fav and most characters are minors lmaooo)

screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr : the worst take ever is shipping Reigen and Mob. Gross! Die.

what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?: I haven’t been here long enough to have any annoying people

worst discord server and why: not in any

which ship fans are the most annoying?: if you ship rei//mob. DIE!

what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?: i already hated Mogami (not from a narrative standpoint, i LOVE the Mogami arc its gutwrenching) but aBoT fic made me hate him even more. KILL HIM!!!

common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about: Tome is aroace i don’t make the rules (is projecting) but in all seriousness I Really prefer Mob being aroace because his relationship with Tsubomi really reflects my aromantic experience of making up a crush because that’s what I assume it’s supposed to be

worst part of canon: i love the entire show. sooo. i mean i guess its hard for me to watch Reigen on the psychic tv show bc of secondhand embarrassment kicking my ASS

worst part of fanon: sexualizing middle schoolers

number of fandom-related words you've filtered: idk but they’re all gross ships

the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them: not unpopular in the “people hate her” sense but Tome needs more attention, shes so autism and i love her role in the Reigen manga

worst blorboficiation: I haven’t been here long but I haven’t seen a lot of Dimple character study content, usually he's just there because he's always there

that one thing you see in fics all the time: autistic Mob and trans Reigen (positive)

that one thing you see in fanart all the time: older Mob being taller than Reigen which I think is silly <3

you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc): idk how popular it is but mob sympathizing with Mogami just. is not my thing

there should be more of this type of fic/art: Reigen in mogamiland, its so interesting to me

it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...: BROCCOLI ARC BODY HORROR!!!!!!!!!!! Honestly its fucking terrifying already when Mobs friends slowly convert to Dimple-ism but can you imagine. The roots creeping beneath. :3 AND ALSO Reigen having a fear of being on live tv is underrated

you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...: not genuinely ashamed but my guilty pleasure is bashing Reigen over the head with angst

part of canon you found tedious or boring: cant think of any

part of canon you think is overhyped: also cant think of any rn

your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores: the fact that spirits have the power to brainwash without possessing people?? like Dimples two cults are. terrifying!! bc Mob couldn’t sense a spirit changing their minds bc Dimple was chilling in the broccoli

ship you've unwillingly come around to: not genuinely upset about it but I was so surprised I ended up liking yoshieku (Dimple x security guard) the bond between an evil spirit and the man he randomly possessed is incredible

topic that brings up the most rancid discourse: dunno any

common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing: also dunno any

#mp100 #mob psycho 100 #cowardly speaks #i havent hung around the fandom long enough tbh its only been a couple months

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ang3lik · 1 year

Note

Your fics are literally one of my obsessions anyways!

❤️ please ! fandom: scream + my description

My name's Madeline but I preferred to be called Genesis which is my Middle name. I'm really into Music but I don't really stick to a genre. I like R&B, Indie, Pop, and different Spanish genres like Reggaeton, Bachata, Chicano Rock, etc. I have a pretty good relationship with my family but I have a very close relationship with my friends. I'm afro-latina and I'm very proud of it too. I'm sorta a bookworm to the point where I can't go to a store because I'd immediately go to the book section and spend all my money there. I'm obsessed with movies, mainly horror or thriller movies. I'm very much care about my future and school, I want to be an Engineer and ever since Middle School I've been very stuck on that concept. My friends are everything to me, 'I don't care what you say about me but if you say something about my friends' type of thing. I love my culture, I sometimes wish I could stay in my countries for hours and hours.

I hope that was enough!

other info: Hi there again! I just realized I forgot to add some information. So, here it goes! I'm bisexual and possibly Aroace. I really want to be in a relationship but sometimes I'm not very sure. Which kinda has me thinking if I even want to be in a relationship with another human being. I love jewelry, my grandma used to make jewelry when I was a kid and I just remember absolutely loving it. I don't really care if it's gold or silver but I mostly wear gold jewelry. I like street wear type of clothing or baggy type of clothing. I'm not much of a girly person and I've just grown to love the style. I love art, I could stare at art all day I swear.

hi sweetheart ! thankyou so much 💗 i hope you like this ! also i love the name genesis !

i ship you with… anika kayoko!

anika loves your taste in music and it’s actually how you guys met. at a party and barely anybody was dancing before she decided to, she had been looking over at you with your friends all night before mindy had pushed her to ask you to dance!

anika gets on well with your family and friends, she’s also a very family/friend orientated person but no one’s opinions and love matters to her more than yours. you guys have little book dates, where you might go shopping for some new books, or you guys go to the café or the beach and read them side by side.

when you’re laying side by side at night you definitely tell each other about the plots of the books you’re reading and you both look over each others shoulders trying to read what the other is reading. anika also loves your love for your culture! she loves hearing new things and discovering new things about your culture.

you also go to art studios and museums together and definitely have art dates where you each have a canvas and paint something, gifting to the other. anika really loves pottery and she really likes making you jewellery dishes and pottery dates!

#✰ genesis #— celebrations ִ ࣪𖤐 #scream #scream 6 #scream vi #scream 2023 #anika kayoko #devyn nekoda #❤️ lust for life

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olderthannetfic · 2 years

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I'm in a weird limbo like "have I never had the desire to be in a relatioship or having sex with someone because I'm somewhere on the aroace spectrum, because I've never really had examples of healthy romantic relationships around me and I'm just too much of a romantic towant no-strings-attached sex, or because deep down I know I'm weird and unlovable? were the rare things I identified as crushes I never really wanted to act on for some reason on people I actually knew rather than just safely untouchable celebrities *real* crushes or just some kind of aesthetic attraction?" and I have been there for years tbh. I think I have a libido, because I have kinks and because every once in a while I feel the need to jerk off, but when I see other people talk about masturbation and especially sex as a *urgent* need that presents itself very regularly and can fuck you up if you ignore it, my instinctive response is disbelief, like "you mean that's not just a smut trope??" *Especially* when it comes to sex, because then I'm like "surely you don't need a partner and jerking off is just as good???" Then again, sometimes I think I may not even jerk off right, because I get wet but I'm pretty sure I only had a orgasm once and that's fine with me, really.

Despite all of that, I love romance (books, movies, hell even quote-collages on tumblr), and erotica, and kinky fic and fanart, especially if it's porn with feelings (which to me is really more like... all kinds of heightened feelings, including negative ones) but sometimes I also like "cold prickly" stuff (does anyone use that distinction anymore? Like, warm fuzzy/cold prickly). I can actually get very emotional over it all! I can definitely get aroused from the horny stuff, but usually most I get out of it is aesthetic/sensual/emotional pleasure. Every once in a blue moon I even watch porn, even if I prefer short clips/previews to longer stuff because I find that boring/the attempts at plot and dialogue make cringe. Sometimes I even think "oh, if I ever had the opportunity to try that irl, I think I'd like to take it" about kinks I've read about or watched.

And then, most of the fic I write is smut, romance, or a combination of the two. I love shipping as a thing to do myself and as phenomenon to read up on, and the same goes for kink in shipping. It's all so interesting and fascinating, romance and sex and kink and all the things that go with them in fiction, pro or fannish. My blog is full of stuff like that, so is my AO3, so are my conversations in fannish spaces.

It's just... I don't really fantasize about romance or sex in ways that involve myself. Or people I know. Or people who aren't clearly non-existing fictional characters. The only times when I do are when I consciously make an effort to to try and figure myself out I guess? Like, would I like this thing the way it's portrayed in fiction? Yes, I'm pretty sure I would. Would I enjoyed the more realistic stuff that would probably go with it irl? I'm not sure because the thought of it is already stressing me out but what if I'm just childish/weak-willed/a horrible person who's horrible at interacting with other people like a normal human being? Could I think of a type of person, man or woman or nb, I could try to make an effort for? Not really.

I guess what I'm trying to say is... brains are weird. People are weird. And anonymous or sem-anonymous online spaces are places where you can just, idk, take a bit of weight off it. Not constantly worry if your interests align with your identity (or, uh, I guess attempts at identity in my case) in the right way. Love romantic love and the ways people talk about it a weird amount even if that's not the way you feel about it in your own life, even.

(... leaving aside that having a set of hyperspecific tags for variations on the same subject, if I got what that anon was saying, doesn't really sound like a good way of organizing a blog to me, lol)

FWIW, most descriptions of masturbation are very cis man oriented and narrow even considering that. Orgasm is not always the goal of masturbation if you're the kind of person who can hang out all afternoon doing it.

And fantasizing only about fictional characters and/or scenarios not involving oneself is pretty common. It can mean you're asexual, but I don't think it has to. I think it's just widely ignored by sexuality researchers, and only asexuals trying to self describe have elaborated on the subject much. It's a pet peeve of mine that I've sent more than one rude letter to sexuality researchers about over the years.

I think people can organize their blogs how they like, but people going "Unf. I want them so bad!" and meaning it ~aesthetically~ instead of hornily is a pet peeve of mine in the same way that those dumbass people using the "submissive and breedable" meme and claiming it's not a horny thing are. So I'll avoid blogs I notice doing that.

(LOL. As if I'd notice. We all know I only read my activity page and not my dashboard. But still.)

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nebvlafrost · 1 year

Text

◆| New Introduction Post |◆

December 12, 2022 update - for the blog!

...... Welcome!

My names are Nyxien and Nebvla, though I commonly go by Nyxien. I am an 18-year-old Writer and Digital Artist who is busy working on a novel series titled “Black Tides”. I won’t often be active here unless it’s for those very things. I’ve never been comfortable writing my “About me” like this but I will slowly get more used to it.

I love studying Psychology (psychiatry portion), Sociology, and Virology while I’m away from social media, writing, and drawing.

I identify with the gender Agenderfaun. If you haven’t heard of it, it is a demigender (2 genders) where the static part of my gender is nonexistant (agender/genderless), the other half is fluidly moving through male/masc-aligned identities and neutral identities (genderfaun). I use it/its, they/them, and paw/paws.

My other identities include; Gaybian, Aroace-spec (desinoromantic erosflux), Queerplatonic, and Ambiamorous. I am in a polyamorous relationship currently.

I’m a DID System with Borderline Personality Disorder.

I have yet to discover my colourblindness type as it is important for me to know since I am a Digital Artist.

I am a Wolf Therian and Techkin(digital things specifically)!

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Boundaries

Users whose ages fall between 16 and 26 are preferred in interactions.

No pet names or flirting unless we are friends / dating.

Do not involve, or mention, me in any sort of discourse without my knowlege.

No calling me “girl”, “boy”, “woman”, “man”, “enbyfriend”, “joyfriend”- even if it’s joking.

My honorifics are Sir, Mr., and Mx. Use them if you want to, otherwise refer to me by my names.

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Do not interact with this blog if you (are)....

Against Self-Dx on a well-informed level

Dislike, easily triggered, or easily made uncomfortable by heavy themes (Black Tides will have A LOT of these themes and I will discuss them often)

Dream Stan (specifically Dream himself)

Intersexist

Minor(s) under 16

Proshipper/Profiction (fiction can, and will, affect reality)

Racist

Radical Feminist and/or Masculist, including Trans exclusionary and Sex worker exclusionary

Radical Queer (not Radical Inclusionist)

Stigmatize disorders (i.e: calling abuse by a narcissist “narcissistic abuse” instead of what it actually is: emotional / mental abuse)

Support NFTs

Support/are pro-contact Pedophile, Necrophile, Zoophile, or otherwise acting on paraphilias that harm another being, regardless if they are alive or not. (”NOMAP / MAPs” fall under this DNI too because they are still pedophiles)

Transmedicalist

(I genuinely don’t care about anti-endos & anti-mspec les/gay/hets but do not spread your hate on my blog, you will be blocked without any warning should you dare to do it. If you break this DNI, you will also be blocked without any warning.)

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anonofseasons · 9 months

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What do your characters look for in a partner romantically? Personality/looks if they have a specific type?

Thank you for the ask! This is a fun and interesting question. :)

I’m not entirely sure which characters you want to hear about most, so I’ll focus on the Liddell kids. I have trouble with tumblr refusing to post anything long (not an issue I had in the past on tumblr, since I’d post chapters of stories on here), so if anyone wants to hear about other characters, I’ll do them in separate posts/asks. ^^

For all of the kids, however, someone “not like Vivian” is important in a partner! ahahaha Answers below cut ;)

I’ll start with Sophie, since she’s actually had romantic partners. She’s been in several relationships, even if Brielle and Rhett are the only two times she’s ever been married. As far as personality, she seeks those who are kind and make her laugh. People she can relax around. Those who enjoy a bit of mystery and things that are whimsical, if only because she’s anxious that revealing she’s a spirit could total the relationship.

For looks, she tends to be one of those “fall in love with the person and start seeing all the beauty of their features even more” people, but she does like pretty eyes and a kind smile to attract her attention first. :)

I’ve mentioned Shannon is aroace before, in that he’s never experienced any sort of arousal or romantic attraction to people. This has nothing to do with his upbringing, although that does affect him having any partners. He might thrive in a queerplatonic polyship someday. For now, I’ll just be grateful he’s warming to his siblings and understanding that Phineas’s other kids are also his found family.

Shannon would require that partners not be anything like Vivian and Graham. That extends to more than personality. Maybe he needs a quiet dork of a partner who enjoys reading by the windows on rainy days, the curtains open wide to let in all the natural light despite the weather. :’)

Shannon will not date humans.

Howie finds “liking nature” attractive. (I feel like spirits in general will gravitate toward those who love nature, who knew? But I bet he dates a lot of people whose favorite season is autumn “coincidentally”.) He does have a preference for redheads. He loves having someone to compete with on racing or climbing, someone who’ll join him on hikes.

As he wants kids eventually, he will seek partners who feel the same about parenting as he does, given his traumatic background. It’s not a spoiler because this takes place well beyond the epilogue, but Howie does have a family and ends up being like… Best Dad Ever.

Howie will date humans, but for long-term partners, he’ll hold preference for fellow spirits.

Bee… has a partner in the epilogue, and saying too much about what he wants is a bit of a spoiler. I’ll just let that relationship speak for itself, and if anyone has further questions, feel free to ask them. I plan to keep asks open for a while after I finish the series, although I’m sure it’ll eventually taper off and just be around for reference to new readers, if I have any. xD

Okay, so El.

El… is attracted more to fictional characters. Particularly monsters. Scales and horns are sexually attractive. I answered another ask about sexualities and briefly mentioned this, but I was a bit self-conscious about going into it at the time. He’s probably aro, but he loves the idea of romance and courtship—at least to make it a significant part of his reading!

And while I’ve been too chickenshit to actually wonder this out loud before, I’ve honestly thought that based on how unhealthy El and Howie’s dynamic is, how many readers have ended up shipping them. No judgment here, obviously it crossed my mind. It has that taboo ripeness for the picking, that’s all? It’s not canon, but I also don’t mind people shipping characters. (I’m old, and some of my earliest fandoms included Clamp works and Spiral Suiri no Kizuna soooo…yeah.)

#“I'm old” yeah no kidding I'm out here using “cut” from my LJ days instead of “read more” xD

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foxstens · 1 year

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once again i must talk about the idea of attraction and sexuality and all that

recently i had a brief moment where i wondered if everyone was demiromantic, because i confused the idea of romantic attraction with actually falling in love and so i was like ‘how the fuck can you do that with a stranger’. yea no that’s not how attraction works apparently

so now im just sitting here, thinking about how i’ve been exposed to the concept of attraction for about 10 years and i still don’t understand it, really. like once every few years i look up what sexual and romantic attraction means and i reread a bunch of definitions that i learned years ago and im still none the wiser.

i’ve always had trouble with the split attraction model - i do think it’s nice and useful for the people who feel comfortable using it, but i have trouble applying it to myself because it feels like i don’t experience either, at least not in the way allo people do

like i have a hard time identifying whether i experience any attraction at all, let alone what kind it is, do you know what i mean? so calling myself aroace is by far the easiest, but is it really true?

because i do not actually have much experience. like i’ve had a total of three crushes, all on boys

1. in kindergarten that i do not remember anything about but i’m fairly certain it happened, somehow

2. one in high school that lasted like two weeks perhaps, i have no idea what it was the guy was a total jerk i didn’t even like anything about him, i just paid attention to him a lot for some reason? he was a transfer student and i might have been bored

3. the longest-running one, all throughout middle school there was this guy, him and his sister were the type of kids that could mingle with everyone but they were always to me, the resident Bullied Kid, i even had actually interesting conversations with him at times so i guess it makes sense. he’s the only person from middle school i still keep in touch with via facebook, hell he’s one of three people from middle school i actually remember. y e a h.

i sure hope this isn’t how most people experience crushes. but yea as you can see, i do not have a lot of experience with anything. and the interesting thing is, for years i have been saying that im attracted to women, but i wonder how far that extends. like i can say for certain that i have a much stronger aesthetic attraction to people who present as women, and that if i were to ever be in any sort of a relationship with someone, i can only imagine it happening with a woman. but also i very much prefer the idea of not doing that with anyone, ever.

maybe at this point it’s not even about attraction or lack thereof, but more about me being afraid of and allergic to people.

interestingly enough i have a similar experience when it comes to gender. i stll regularly wonder what the heck a gender even is and how people can just. identify with one of them, when i feel so far removed from both of them and from the very concept itself.

and sometimes i wonder if that’s just how i am, or if it’s more of a defense mechanism. because if you identify with something more... common? then there’s all sorts of expectations and stuff, so it’s better to be... obscure... i swear that made sense in my head

but then again i never did feel strongly about gender, and i didn’t start thinking about sexuality until i was 16 and neck-deep in tumblr culture, and even after that i didn’t start seriously considering my own sexuality until ace discourse became a thing.

#my posts #lifeblogging #read more #long post #my rambles #idek what to tag this #i just have one of these moments once every few years #being a human is so fucking weird

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seedsofwinter · 2 years

Text

my heart is not the problem

i’ve been thinking about somethings, regarding my relationships and connections, and wanted to just kinda write it out and throw it into the void rather than have to deal with like people replying to me about their own shit when it’s not about them, or not getting the nuance bc character limits. i miss livej void shouting and was suggested to try here.

so here i go. it’s a bunch of jumbled rambling thoughts, tmi, and tldr.

about 5 years ago, i was in the end of my last major relationship (”major” being something that lasts for more than a year, for my definition.) it would take a few more agonizing months of trying, failing, and ultimately pointing out it wasn’t working and getting told that my soon-to-be-ex had not been in love with me for about 10 months at that point. cool cool cool. he seemed to want to still have SOMETHING with me, so we filled out a “what do you want from this relationship” thing, one of those Relationship Buffet type graphics where each person answers honestly and then you compare.

he wanted to have sex with me still and nothing else. i wanted friendship and connection and nothing else.

this knowledge will fuck me up for a long time.

because when we got together, he’d been THE FIRST person i’d dated who liked me physically. i thought, wow, amazing, someone is ATTRACTED TO ME??

and over the nearly 4 years we were together, i slowly felt worse and worse about this. because i saw what his preference was.... and yes, some people were aesthetic-attraction attractive but also.... people i was like “oh no” about. and i looked at the aesthetically-attractive people (the only attraction mode i actually have that ever feels active; im aroace spec) and i looked at the people who i went “um pass”, and i knew i was in the “um pass” column.

so like, to have him only want to fuck me? a thing i did with him bc it was a tertiary attraction, something i could do with him bc i enjoyed him enjoying it? no. noooo. this did not result in further in-person interaction, and we moved to just being online acquaintances. but i had really loved him; he was the first person i felt what i thought love must feel like, but probably it was just feeling special and attractive to someone that got into my head.

i think it was about a year later that he “admitted” to me that he had run into a few people in that time between who had similar issues that i had (i’m poor, and got a ton of mental health fuckery) and that when he looked at the issues he knew that--if he could find ways past them--who he really wanted to be with was me.

and i told him STOP THAT. i told him I DONT WANT TO BE WITH YOU. i told him JUST DO BETTER WITH PEOPLE IN THE FUTURE, that’s how you can do right be me but STOP WANTING ME. it was gross that he’d tell me that, when i knew what he really missed was the kink and the fucking.

and within 6 months i blocked him. he got weird about being blocked, and a friend sent me screenshots of him LOSING HIS FREAKING MIND in a private group and accusing me of wanting to sleep with people who we had as mutuals, bc he couldn’t understand why i would still be friends with people i met through him if that wasn’t that case. (it’s not and never has been the fucking case. it’s been 5 years: he’s the last person i had sex with. i hope i can find someone else to have sex with before i die so he’s not THE LAST person, but i don’t want to have sex with anyone, and i don’t want relationships. i need to, like, find someone a few years from now to be like “help me not die with the last cock i touched being this shitbag ex of mine’s, and then let’s never see each other ever again.”)

anyway!

a little over 2 years ago, 3 years after that guy, i entered into an online relationship (the type is relevant bc no physical interaction) that lasted about 9, 10 months? they’re a good person. and being in a relationship with them was good for me for about 6 months, after which point i had some old family shit dredged up, and i was dealing with some of the worst dysphoria i’ve ever felt. these were not their fault, but these were pieces of my life which impacted my ability to be a good boyfriend. my own definition of one at least. i’ve since traced back a bunch of my dysphoria to--and again not their fault--the gift of a video chat i gave over the holidays. they’d wanted that, and it felt like not a huge deal. i’d done video chats during the pandemic with friends, and while they were draining for me, i could make that choice knowingly. i thought, too, hey, i’ve sent this person im in a relationship with a chunk of selfies, and we would talk on the phone once a week for hours and hours past when they should’ve been in bed. it’s just moving pictures; they know what i look like, they know what i sound like.

but something about seeing myself in the little image in the corner, and knowing that they could see me, as i look and not as i AM, ugh. that caught right the fuck up in my brain, hard.

so for the last 3 months of that relationship, i tried really hard not to overthink what i looked like, coupled with the depression of family shit (which included a death), but ultimately failed in that endeavor--like failed so hard i stopped taking selfies even just for myself, and maybe i take one but then i see it, cringe, and delete it.

when they finally called me out on my crap, my not talking to them as much or seeming excited to make plans to meet up, i had to be honest and realize i couldn’t give the kind of time that i would want to give them if i was in a good place, and the kind of time they were seeking from a relationship. it let me realize, in general, that i can’t give regular time to anyone. that i’m better off and HAPPIER not in a pairing type relationship.

i’ve considered myself some variation of non-monogamous for at least 15 years, and have never been monogamous, truly. like, even in high school, that just didn’t make sense to me but i didn’t have the words or the maturity to not fuck it up. so finding the, i guess, grace to let myself not want and not seek ANY relationships, both for myself and bc it wouldn’t be fair to whoever i was dating? for nearly a year and a half, that has been great. i’ve felt a lot less stress to date bc i can just say outright and honestly, oh no, i don’t date. i’m a confirmed bachelor, thanks much anyway.

but here’s the problem, the part that i’ve been thinking about a lot lately.

see, people act like if you don’t date, if you don’t Love Someone, that you’re not open to the experiences of love. how can you love if you’re not IN LOVE with a person you’re dating?

i’ve sat with this question. because i do love. i am VERY open with my heart, in fact, because i trust it to a lot of people: i have so many best friends and close friends, and i trust them with my heart. i don’t “trust they’ll never hurt me”, no, i trust that they’re worth the risk, and i’m willing to take it, that chance I'll get hurt emotionally by a friend. i want to love them and experience the love from them in those ways. it is fulfilling, and asks nothing of me that i cannot say no to, nothing that makes me feel guilty for not giving.

then i saw a line in a fandom comic. it’s 2 characters in a ship i adore, they’re having sex for the first time. and one says how they trust the other with their heart and soul; the other says they trust the first with their body.

and that really struck me. because I don't know a single person I trust with my body. i couldn’t imagine it. it was revolting to consider, and i was disgusted thinking about an imaginary-me that would trust like that. what would i have trampled over on my boundaries, to be in such a position again?

and like i said, i’m asexual. i tend to cycle around whether i’m sex-positive, -neutral, -averse, or -repulsed depending on how i’m feeling. but i havent in the past been opposed to physically connecting with a partner. it’s often something that was AT LEAST a small piece of my relationships when all averaged out. i figured it was just something i’d be okay with at some point in the future.

but as vaccines rolled out and the possibility of putting my actual physical body’s safety into someone else’s hands became less of a theory and more of a THING that might happen, it was terrifying. i hadn’t realized and i DIDNT realize until i started thinking about it after that comic’s line, that i don’t trust my body to anyone but myself.

i thought i’d made this realization. this choice. to not date people and not seek it. because I didn't want to disappoint anyone when i am not as emotionally available as they would seek from a partner; that i didn’t want to be seen as cold when i cannot give of myself bc i’ve learned my own boundaries are extremely not in keeping with what the world teaches others to expect from someone who loves them. and these parts are still true but it's so much more that I do not trust anyone would want to be physical with me with good intent. even if know they’re not a bad person.

part of it is, as I’ve become more solid in my gender identity and needs, the desire to be seen in certain ways. but the expectation is the typical ‘person who'd expresses interest in my body’ would subconsciously gender it/me, would sexualize my body parts when that’s not their right. it feels like people have always either not been attracted to me (feels great, super...) or been attracted to pieces of me that i hate (also great, love it!).

before those relationships i mentioned above, i had one that was barely physical, but when it was, i had to stay within my least favored gender mode for her, and she didn’t like her body either so i couldn’t enjoy boosting her up without her feeling dysphoric about it.

i had another relationship that withheld affection when i needed comfort.

i had another relationship that “got it out of the way” in the beginning and we barely ever touched after that bc she mostly liked me for my brain. a year of goodnight kisses, and wondering what i did wrong to see the hesitation any time she reached out to me. (and like i know it’s not my fault, but at the time, it didn’t feel good.)

another was purely a kink relationship, and that was probably the best 3 months of my trusting someone else with my body. bc everything was based around negotiation and consent. it’s honestly a shame that the more recent relationship guy who was into my body has my mind associating kink with really negative stuff, bc i was always a proponent of kink doesn’t have to equal sex; and this relationship really helped me solidify that feeling, as well.

but another, i dealt with fatphobic bullshit, and [cw: mentions of past sexual assaults] he mostly wanted to sexually assault me in my sleep. [/end cw]

another i was hidden and not allowed to talk about us, bc she didn’t want her girlfriend learning she was being unfaithful.

and these are just the people i trusted with my body. like a damn fool. that’s not the physically abusive parents. the other kinds of bodily abusive adults and schoolmates. my body has NEVER BEEN SAFE except when i’m in control.

so sure, i can give the trust of my heart just fine. but i can’t imagine trusting another person with my body ever again.

and that makes me feel... so much more broken than when i first thought about it all. when i thought no, this is a boundary, and it’s good and healthy. now im not so sure. but im not willing to try, on the off chance i was right and shouldn’t be trusting anyone but myself on this.

#personal #relationships #trauma #sexuality #voidshouting

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otakusheep15 · 2 years

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Obey Me Sexuality HCs

I’ve already done the gender hcs, so why not do sexuality (and romance) hcs. And remember, this is all just my opinion, so there’s no need to start a fight if you disagree lol.

Lucifer: Bisexual demiromantic

He has an easier time hooking up with people and then just brushing them off the next morning. It’s super rare that he actually feels a genuinely romantic connection with someone. When he does find that connection, it confuses him and he can’t differ that feeling from his other desires, so it takes him a while to get used to it. In terms of preference, he doesn’t really have one, especially romance-wise.

Mammon: Pansexual panromantic

Same sexual attraction as his romantic attraction. He’s still a major disaster though. Constant pan panic every time he sees someone even remotely attractive. He identifies with the pansexual label the most, but he will admit that he does have a slight preference for non-binary and gender non-conforming individuals. Something about them is just so cool to him. But it’s only a very small preference he didn’t realize until very late into life.

Leviathan: Asexual grey-romantic

However, he’s a very sex positive asexual. He does enjoy the pleasure of sexual experiences, he just doesn’t feel sexually attracted to real individuals. And as for romance, he doesn’t particularly care for it. He’s fallen in love with 3D individuals once or twice, but never that often. It also has a lot to do with his shut-in nature. He’s just too shy to go out and make connections with others. In general, he just prefers his 2D characters.

Satan: Demisexual demiromantic

Another one who’s sexual and romantic attraction match up. He’s just never had much of a need for any kind of relationship, sexual or romantic. He much prefers platonic relationships. Not to mention, he doesn’t have much time for those types of relationships. They just feel like a burden to him most of the time. However, there’s always that one-in-a-blue-moon individual that changes his mind real quick.

Asmodeus: Omnisexual demiromantic

As is obvious, he loves sex, and he feels sexual attraction very easily. However, he very rarely feels a connection beyond that. In fact, he finds he only really feels romantic attraction towards those he’s very close to, like Solomon. He actually does have a preference for more male/male-presenting individuals, both romantically and sexually, but he’s honestly up for anything.

Beelzebub: Grey-asexual panromantic

Genuinely has no preference towards gender in the slightest, especially in the romantic sense. In terms of sexuality, he’s just never really felt a need for it. He supposes he enjoys it every now and again, but he rarely ever craves it. In fact, he’s only ever felt any serious cravings for sex when he was with serious and long-term partners. Back to romance, he doesn’t really seek that out either, but he’s not as opposed to it as sex.

Belphegor: Asexual demiromantic

He doesn’t really mind having sex, but he’s never been one to initiate it. If he just so happens to have a partner who wants sex, he’ll indulge them if he’s in the right mood. Speaking of partners, he’s also never been that interested in having one, but there have been a couple of times where’s he’s wanted to date someone. However, he only has those feelings towards people he’s close to and trusts a lot, meaning it’s usually close friends.

Diavolo: Homosexual panromantic

(this is definitely going to offend at least one person lol) So, he feels romantic attraction towards anyone of any gender. It does not matter to him. However, he only feels a sexual attraction towards those who identify as men/more masc-presenting people. He can’t explain it, I can’t explain it, but that’s just how it is for him. Oh, him and Lucifer have totally done it before btw.

Barbatos: Asexual aromantic

So, like, let’s be real here. As much as we’re all in love with him, him being aroace just makes sense. His main focus is his work and taking care of Diavolo. And that job takes up basically all of his time. Plus, he doesn’t seem like he’d be all that interested in relationships if not for the fact that he’s in an otome game.

Simeon: Asexual panromantic

And before you ask, no, I did not make him asexual just because he��s an angel. Personally, I just can’t see him being sexually attracted to anyone. Would he consider having sex with a partner if they asked? Of course. But it’s more for them than for him. And in terms of romance, gender/gender presentation doesn’t mean anything to him. He looks more for personality.

Solomon: Bisexual demiromantic

He probably has slept around with a lot of different people. It was most likely as a coping mechanism because he felt lonely, but he still did it. It’s rare that he’s felt any romantic attraction towards someone because he doesn’t want to go through that burden of losing someone to their own mortality. He sort of just sleeps with whoever he finds and then leaves the next morning. (then he met Asmo and barbs and now they are all dating)

Bonus Luke: Questioning

He’s still a kid, and so he’s still trying to figure stuff out. Yes, I know children (myself included) can and sometimes do know what they are from a young age, but he doesn’t. No one ever really taught him about this sort of thing, so he’s never had the chance to think about it. But coming down to the Devildom and seeing all of these different types of orientations made him realize there are options.

Also, all of the non-Lukes are poly and/or open to poly. I may or may not expand on that later, but who knows? I sure don’t lol.

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gb-patch · 3 years

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Ask Answers: May 15th Part 2

And here’s the next part of the long answer set of the day!

When will OL: N&F take place? Beginnings and Always took place during summer breaks, will now and forever take place during a fall break or will the characters be going to school at the time of the events we play through?

It takes place over all of the fall season, so school will be happening in OL2. Some events do take place in school, though many times events only start after school is already out for the day, haha.

Hey!! I have kind of a weird question?? I’m sorry if it’s been answered before and I just haven’t seen it but is OL 2 taking place during the same years as OL 1? I’m just curious, thank you for such amazing games!!!

It’s a similar time frame, but not 100% exactly same.

Do you have any idea when the demo for now and forever will be available?

Hopefully this fall! But that’s not a guarantee.

Okay the crime show in Step 2: Growing up. Long blonde hair, police station, crime series? Was it The Closer? Because I’m the same age as MC and Cove and my mom was constantly watching that when I was 13. 😂

Haha, yeah! The Closer and, to a lesser degree, Medium were the kind of shows I was referencing there. My mom also used to watch those back in the day.

Hey um this might be an odd question but if the setting of OL: N&F is fall/autumn, what country or city will it take because my mind tells me it is either Poland or Canada. Also I can't wait for the game I am hyped

It’s set in the USA again. We’d like to be able to have cameos and that’s easiest to do if the OL games take place in the same country.

Is it possible for the PC of OL to have non-seriously dated other people in the in between years even if they’ve had a consistent crush on Cove?

You can causally date Baxter in Step 3 if you get his DLC and then ultimately choose Cove in Step 4. If you mean off-screen people, it doesn’t really come up, but you can certainly headcanon that. The game never says Cove is the only partner you’ve ever had.

Is there going to be a Kickstarter for Now and Forever as well? For like voiced names and stuff again? Didn’t find B&A until after it was released and I’d really love the opportunity to hear my name in the game 🥺

Yeah, we are gonna have a Kickstarter with getting a voiced name as a reward! Though, it will be more expensive than it was for OL1. I feel bad to raise the price but we realized too late the first time around that it was being super undersold for the amount of work it took, aha.

Do you know how much the remaining DLC for OL will cost? (Step 4, Derek, Baxter)

Step 4: Free

Wedding DLC: $2.99USD

Derek DLC: $4.99USD

Baxter DLC: $4.99USD

Has an artist for the new position been picked yet?! I'm super excited for the new game!

We did fill that spot. Thank you so much for taking the time to apply!

hmmm what would it take to get each of the XOXO jerk squad to feel the need to hug you?

They’d have to first like you a fair amount, otherwise the most you’d get is maybe a pat on the shoulder. If they were attached, they might hug you if you broke down crying or if you gave them super good news.

Unless it’s Shiloh, of course. If you want a hug you only have to ask!

May i ask how the Derek DLC will work? I believe that there aren’t any memories in step 4 and doesnt derek’s dlc take place during that step? So will the dlc add memories? Thank you!

Derek’s DLC will add five Moments to Step 2 (a new page will appear on that screen if you get the DLC). Then in Step 4 you’ll have to choose between playing the default epilogue or going through the Derek romance story.

Is the pc version on itch,io different from the steam version? Like an offline one or something?

Steam has achievements, but that’s about it. Both can be played offline, if you prefer.

I've been wondering this for awhile, what determines if cove winds up with a ponytail in step 3? I've done multiple runs with different MCs with varying hairstyles. Or does it have to do with a particular moment in step 2?

I’m afraid I can’t say exact choices that determine things. But generally it’s preference based options in the Step before that decide those things.

Any Floret Bond updates?

No, the artist had to leave the project and it’s been on-hold. I’m not sure if I want to try working just with what we have or replacing it all entirely. The design is a bit too specific for us to easily find someone who could mimic it. Hopefully we’ll work things out later, though.

In step 3 is Cove's plan always to stay in sunset bird?

Yeah. He is never ready at 18-years-old to make a big life change.

I love your content! If it's alright to ask, you answered in a previous ask about how Jeremy was too particular with what he likes his types to be romanceable with just any MC and it's sort of got me wondering.. What /are/ his types and/or preferences and such? Sorry if it's a lot!

Jeremy likes stubborn jerks and will not date someone who’s sweet or even generally a decent person, haha.

uh, excuse me if you said this somewhere before, but how will step 4 be actually? Will it he like an actual step and have moments and dlc and all? Or will it be more like a long epilogue of some sort?

Will the step 4, the wedding and extra routes dlcs be paid too? Im just confused, sorry if im asking too much

Step 4 is only an epilogue, so it’s just a long series of scenes one after the other rather than a collection of Moments you can choose from.

The Step 4 epilogue is free, the wedding DLC, Derek DLC, and Baxter DLC cost money.

i’m not sure how much of the wedding dlc you have planned already, or if this would be to spoilery, but what kind of wedding traditions will be included? i keep thinking about how flustered cove would get over a garter toss & was wondering if we’d see a scene like that haha. obviously no worries if it’s not included, i’ll enjoy literally anything cove related

I don’t know for sure yet, haha. Right now we’re focused on the parts before the big day. We’ll see how many scene alterations we can include for the wedding itself later on.

Hello! Firstly, thank you for creating such an amazing game like OL, and I couldn’t be more excited for OL2! Out of curiosity, are you looking for any writers to come on for OL2 or are you all pretty much set in that department? Just thought I’d shoot my shot haha but I’m still excited regardless ^^!

We will be hiring writers for OL2 later this year! Thank you for the interest.

Will we be blessed with a spin-off Yandere Cove, like XOXO Blood Droplets?

Sadly, no. It’s a shame but there’s not enough time to keep making OL1 bonus/spin-off content.

How is Q pronounced?

I’m afraid Q’s full name hasn’t been publicly announced yet so I can’t answer here (Q and T are the first letters of the names for the new LIs in Our Life: Now & Forever).

Question; is the steam version getting a Mac update? I purchased the dlc there thinking it had Mac support without realizing it and just wondered if I’d need to refund it to purchase on itch.io 😭

I’m really sorry, you will need to get a refund from Steam. We do hope to have it there for Steam eventually, but have no idea of when it’ll happen. Apple requires special notarization to be an officially accepted app for their devices. We don’t have that. Steam requires having that, Itch will let you release it as an non-notarized third party app. That’s why Itch is the only place that has the Mac version right now.

would you mind posting outfit sheets for Cove in every step? it would make things a lot easier for us artists. it would save a lot of time spent looking for references

I think we did do the earlier steps when they were finished way back in 2019 (this game took a long time to make, aha), but we can probably repost them sometime!

In our life n&f, will we be able to get into qprs/will there be more options in regards to having deep platonic relationships with the love interests? Because as an aroace individual, it would be great if there could also be emphasis on platonic love so that it's more aspec inclusive.

It’s a little hard to say at this point. There may not be things like a wedding DLC for OL2 and so the relationship for platonic and romantic feelings might not go as far as it did in the first game. We’ll kind of have to see how much we can do based on timeframe/budget constraints that will only be set near the end of the year. But we will be keeping things like that in mind at least.

hi! i really really like your game and im absolutely in love with it! i cant wait to try your other games like xoxo droplet and future OL NF :))

during the step 3 erands moment i got curious, which fudge flavor is his favorite? it seems like he likes all of them, but which 4 do you think he would like best?

also i noticed that in some playthroughs cove would let me give him a piggy back ride, and in some he wouldn't, how come?

how does your choices affect cove's interests or looks? i replayed the game without changing any choices but i got cove to look different, is it just random?

thank you!

Cove’s favorite flavors are ones with nuts and that are fruity! But he appreciates them all. Whether or not you can give him a piggyback ride depends on if your MC is fit/large enough to hold a muscular 6-foot-tall beach boy, haha.

Cove’s appearance does depend on choices and it’s generally tied to choices that are preference based rather than emotion/action based, such as which key chain you pick in Step 1.

Is it possible for cove to reject MC's proposal at the end of step 3?

Nope. He’ll always accept.

hi! i was wondering how heavily the side characters will be featured in the our life wedding dlc? obviously it'll be cove & mc focused, but i was thinking it'd be sweet if we could take lizzie dress / suit shopping or dance with cliff at the wedding or something.

The side characters are there about as often as they are in normal events. So, it’s clearly focused on Cove but he’s not the only person you have any meaningful moments with.

When will responses be sent out to applicants?

I’m afraid we don’t send responses out to all applications, only ones we’re interested in offering the position to. Not everyone likes rejection emails and the amount of applications is too high to contact them all to say we’re not hiring them. We post updates on the job page when a position has news. Right now we’ve filled every role that was open.

Is there also going to be the option to keep your relationships with the love interests platonic in Our Life: Now and Forever? That's something I really appreciate in Our Life: Beginnings and Always

Yeah! OL will never force you to end up in a romantic relationship with someone.

I was wondering, in the Step 3 Happiness moment, what are the different fishes Cove can compare MC to? I got "you'd be a paradise fish, because being with you is paradise," but my friend got "you'd be an angelfish." Are there more variations?

He says paradise fish if you’re a couple, angelfish if he’s just crushing, and then a royal dottyback/queenfish/emperor tetra (based on your gender) if he likes the MC platonicly.

Hello! So, in one of the Step 3 DLCs, Cove's arm was gone. I think it was to show him putting his arm behind his back. But if that wasn't the case, did it get yeeted?

Thanks for letting us know. That was an error we tried to fix a little while back. When did you make the save file you were playing? If it was older that might be why it happened. Or maybe the error wasn’t fully fixed after all.

Asking for your opinion, but do you think Cove would at all be into ABBA? Because all I could imagine during the car trip in step 3 was him and the MC belting to Mamma Mia.

Haha, yeah, there’d definitely be some ABBA songs he was into.

So throughout the game, Cove can develop different interests depending on the player’s choices; does this mean that he can have different careers in Step 4? Or his is line of work in adulthood never mentioned at all?

He can have different career paths in Step 4!

Hi!! I'm so so sorry if this has been asked before but I just acquired knowledge about the so famous nsfw dlc for OL and nearly chocked on my bubblegum 💀💀💀 So, my real inquiry is if that specific moment will have any kind of impact at some point of the fourth step OR if it will just be treated as a side-story-ish “what if” scenario.Also, is there any chance there'll be something similar for Step 4? Haha jk,,, unless 😳Questions apart let me thank you profoundly for making the best visual novel I've ever played 😭 Really really looking forward the epilogue and OL2 💕 Have a nice day

It’s just a bonus side story that’s fully separate from the main game.

It would be nice to have one for Step 4 too, but I sadly don’t see us having time to actually do it. I don’t know, if people are still asking for more OL1 content several months from now it might be doable and worth doing.

I'd just like to ask, when is Baxter's birthday :0 -- I'm really curious esp with their zodiac signs so ;w;

I don’t know, haha. Maybe I’ll come up with one someday.

Please help!! I bought the Step 3 DLC but I still have no idea how to get to where you can propose to Cove - any tips?

How do I get the option to propose to Cove at the end of the game?

You can click HERE for a discussion on that.

I love that Miranda and Terry are getting together! I'm curious if you have canon sexualities for them? Also just wanted to say how much I love OL and how much joy it brings me everytime I play it <3

Terry likes ladies and Miranda likes dudes!

ngl Step 4 Terry's design reads like y'all see trans guys as their assigned gender more than you see them as men to me (a trans guy)... like maybe if he isn't heavily dysphoric, I could see it, but everything you've said about him doesn't line up with that. Even then, immediate warning bells go off in my head looking at him. I wouldn't have touched the game if I saw him ahead of time.

I’m sorry you aren’t comfortable with the way the design looks. The situation with Terry is that he’s now open about who he is, but the body he was born with is still physically the same. He only came out recently as an adult and hasn’t gone through any treatments/procedures yet (his chest is flatter because he wears a binder). However, even though his body hasn’t transitioned at the point Step 4 happens, no one treats him as anything other than the guy he is. Having a trans character who’s identity is supported/respected from the start is what we’re going for in this case. But what we’re doing with Terry isn’t the only trans content we’ve ever had/ever will have in the future.

how would baxter react to bae pyoun and vice versa? and can you please detailly explain both love interests personalities from our life 2: now and forever? i was just curious, sorry for dumb question!!

I imagine it’d be pretty opposite experiences, haha. Bae would initially think Baxter is pushy and thoughtless, but would quickly realize, oh, he’s instead a soft, considerate boy. Very cute. Baxter would first be struck with the impression that Bae is charming and gentlemanly, but then would realize that, no, he’s a sarcastic asshole. And I’m afraid we can’t reveal the personalities for the next game yet.

Sorry if you've already answered this, but I have a question about the patreon exclusive moment you're working on. I was wondering if it's mainly going to be CGs or if it's mostly character sprites + backgrounds with some CGs.

Either way, thank you for doing the Lord's work and not only making Cove, but making this bonus moment as well 😌😌😌

It’s mostly sprites/backgrounds with two CGs!

—– —– —– —–

Thank you again for the interesting questions everyone :D

We released a new FAQ! It answers common questions and we’ll keep adding more to it. Please check there before sending an ask. FAQ Also, if you prefer to just see the main posts without all the asks/reblogs, feel free to follow our side account instead: GB Patch Updates Blog

#our life #Our Life Beginnings & Always #Our Life: Now & Forever #xoxo droplets #ask #gb patch #gb patch games

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