#steven x therapy

[starks-hero]

Praise Worthy

Pairing: sub!Steven Grant x f!Reader

Summary: You accidentally call Steven your ‘good boy’ and he loses his goddamn mind.

Word Count: 1.5k

Warnings: 18+ smut, minors dni, praise kink, sub!Steven, dom!reader, handjob, referenced oral (m receiving), p in v, overstimulation, some dirty talk, slight choking kink if you squint really really hard, includes some inspiration from this ask

a/n: I'm still a whore for Steven Grant apparently but this is really soft

He was so pretty like this.

Laid out beneath you, his olive body a gorgeous contrast to the bleakness of the bed cloths. His arm was bent at the elbow, hand brushing the side of his head, and his eyes blown with a combination of admiration and love. If it weren't for the fact that you were already straddled over his waist the look would have sent you to your knees.

His hair was tousled, curls falling against his brow and he adorably jerked his head to keep it from his eyes.

You couldn't quite believe he was yours.

With slow, deliberate movements, your fingers brushed his temple and traced his skin until you reached the sharp dropoff of his jaw. You stroked back along the defined feature, Steven smiling as you did. His dimples deepened and his eyes crinkled at the corners when you swiped your thumb across his cheeks blushing warmth.

“What are you doing?” He asked timidly.

You shrug somewhat dismissively, as if the answer was the most obvious thing in the world. “You're so beautiful.” You kissed his lips. “And I want to remember you like this. Want to commit all of you to memory.”

He turned his head to hide his burning cheeks and flustered smile and you were amazed by his ability to be so humble. To be surprised at the idea of you finding him so desirable. Your hand found his jaw and guided his gaze back to yours. His eyes darkened.

You did an admirable job of masking your shock as he tilted his head and gently took your thumb into his mouth. You pressed against the soft pad of his tongue and he whimpered. It was difficult not to when you were looking at him like he was the reason the sun rose every day.

“Shit Steven...” you breathed and his cheeks hollowed. He released your thumb with a pop, a lewd string of spit trailing after it.

Tracing your hand back down his neck to the plain of his chest, you watched the hardened muscles ripple against your touch. Steven managed a shuddering breath. A whine followed each exhale, a delicious sound that caught in his throat.

“That's it, love,” you praised. “You sound so pretty.”

You drew circles against his hips before finally taking him in your hand. His head fell back against the pillow, his back arching off the bed as he bucked into your palm. The sound he made was sinful.

“Gods, you're perfect.”

You kept your movements deft, tightening your grasp with each stroke. Your other hand remained in his hair, chocolate curls winding around your fingers like fine twine. With a careful tug, his eyebrows knit together and his mouth fell slack.

“Please– please, d-don't stop. Please... ”

“I won't, I won't,” you promised. “Not when you're being so good for me.” Your hand fell to his throat, giving an experimental squeeze. He responded so beautifully to your touch. Each moan, each whimper of your name filled you with a sense of divinity. He was yours. All yours. “My good boy.”

Steven gasped. His body tensed beneath you and your hand stilled. It took a few seconds for your own words to catch up with you. A combination of embarrassment and utter mortification set in once they did.

You pulled back enough to catch a glimpse of Steven's reaction and found his eyes already trained on you. His mouth parted slightly, lips glistening and of course you thought of him like that. Of course those words sprung to mind. How could they not when he was so obedient, so responsive, so good.

Intimacy was something you were introducing Steven to slowly. You didn't want to overwhelm him. Didn't want to push your own desires. And you'd been so careful to not let anything slip. But now–

“Shit, Steven I–”

“Call me that again.”

Your eyes widened. “What?”

“Call... call me that again.” His voice was painfully sweet and shy and hoarse from pleasure. You swore there were tears in his eyes. “Please.”

“It doesn't bother you? I know it's not something we've discussed–”

Frantically he shook his head. His hands reached for you, grasping at the swell of your shoulders. “No, no I want to be yours, wanna be your good boy, please–”

His words were the single most liberating thing you'd ever heard. It was as if a switch was flipped.

You nodded at his request, then, you pulled his head back. The muscles of his neck tensed beneath already bruising skin. You kissed and nipped at his neck before closing your lips above his pulse. You continued to work him slowly in your hand.

“love, please ah–”

His whole body convulsed beneath you. “Shh, baby, I've got you, I'm going to take care of you, going to make you feel good, okay?”

He nodded breathlessly, lips parting as you quickened your strokes, thumb brushing over his tip. He strung your name together desperately. His release hit him hard and you watched on as his expression twisted in unbridled pleasure.

“That's it, baby, that's it.” You kept working him through his high. “Gods, look at you-”

Your movements didn't stutter nor did your words of praise as you made him come again; with your hands, your mouth, over and over.

He'd become so susceptive that now, even with your hands holding his wrists gently above his head and you mouthing lazy kisses against his neck, you could feel him rut against your thigh, riding out what must be his fourth orgasm.

You pressed your hand down against his chest, thighs on either side of his own. His breath shook with anticipation.

“Is this okay?” You checked in and Steven answered with a quick nod.

“Use your words, love.”

“Yes,” he whimpered. “Yes, just please, please, fuck-” A sob left him as you sunk down on him. The pleasure you felt as he filled you was almost as satisfying as his expression; brows knit together, teeth digging into his bottom lip.

He was a work of art.

“You're so beautiful like this.” You kissed his shoulder as his breathing began to even out, giving him the chance to adjust. Then, you began to slowly roll your hips against his. Steven cried out, his hands (that had, for the most part, obediently stayed where you'd pressed them against the pillow) shot up to grab your hips. Your hand found his throat again and Steven's eyes rolled back in his head.

“L-love, please I–” he managed. You quicked your pace and his hips rutted up to meet you. “Faster.”

With a smirk, you did as he asked. You leaned down to kiss his jaw. “I wish you could see yourself, Steven. See yourself as I see you.” Your nose brushed against his ear. “It's not a bad idea, huh? Maybe I'll try it soon, have you fuck me in front of a mirror so you can see just how stunning you are like this.”

Steven gasped. You could feel his thighs trembling beneath you. “You're so beautiful, baby, so good for me. My love, my good boy.”

Your words once again pushed him over the edge and he clung to you as the pleasure rolled over him in crushing waves.

He panted against your neck, nails leaving small crescents in your skin. With a breathless laugh, you kissed his temple. A few blissful moments passed in silence. Then,

“I know you're tired but you can give me one more, can't you, love?” you encouraged.

Exhaustion was painted over every inch of Steven's body. His eyes pools of chocolate brown now, his skin sleek and hair damp. An occasional tear still trailed down his cheek.

He nodded.

Falling back onto the pillows, it took Steven a long moment to catch his breath.

Quietly, you slipped out from under the covers. In the short time it took you to journey to the bathroom and back, the cool air of the night had already settled against your skin.

Upon your return, you found Steven's body still strewn out across the bed, akin to something you'd seen depicted in age-old paintings of beauty and splendor.

With the washcloth you'd fetched from the bathroom, you took your time to clean both of you up before joining him with a content sigh. His head moved to rest against your shoulder almost instinctively and likewise, you threaded your fingers into his curls. You then trailed your hand down his back, absentmindedly drawing patterns on the plane between his shoulders.

“I enjoyed that,” he confessed eventually and you smiled to yourself. “I– I want you to call me that more often, if that would be alright?”

His voice was shy at the request.

“Trust me, love.” You pacified him with a kiss. “That won't be a problem.”

Thank you for reading! <3

Moon Knight tag list: @bakerstreethound @yoditopascal @moonlighy @linkpk88 @spideysimpossiblegirl @noahspector @malaanii @ineedmorejakelockley @drmeowingfangirl @loonymagizoologist @othersideoftheparadise @doozywoozy @mywellspringoflife

#sometimes therapy is writing moon knight smut #steven grant x reader #moon knight x reader #marc spector x reader #steven grant imagine #moon knight imagine #steven grant x you #jake lockely x reader #steven grant x y/n #🍋

[bruciemilf]

POV you're Marc Spector and you'd rather eat all 10 toes than go to therapy

#sir get therapy #marvel #mcu #steven grant #moon knight #marc spector #jake lockley #memes #steven grant x reader #marc spector x reader #marcsteven #layla el faouly #khonshu #arthur harrow #mcu moon knight #moonknight

[hunterfan16]

I'm an artist and I can draw whatever I want

#art #digital art #drawing #meme #crackship #im an artist and I can draw whatever I want #this is what happens when an artist finds out they have free will #hollow knight #steven universe #peridot #peridot x hollow night #your hand in my hand #I could never choose to love another #maybe one day I could learn to love you too #I really need to reschedule that therapy appointment #i dont know what possessed me to make this #Picasso?

[howaboutcastiel]

Lunar Therapy: Losing Your Hair

Going to be honest… this lunar therapy session is entirely selfish because my hair is falling out and I’m freaking out. I just pulled handfuls of hair out of my scalp in the shower as I was washing it… and I don’t know how to cope with that. So I’m gonna write fanfiction. Masterlist. I think that:

Steven Grant

- would hold you and just let you cry. You come out of the bathroom after a shower or emerge from the bedroom after brushing your hair and… he just takes you in his arms and lets you sob through it.

- he’s very gentle and sweet-talking, right? He tells you that it’s gonna be okay and that you’re still beautiful and always beautiful to him. He strokes your face and rubs your back and just makes you feel loved.

- Steven will research hairstyles to hide the patches in your hair. He will learn how to braid, how to plate, how fucking knit your hair together if he thinks it will help. And he’ll sit you down in the living room and put on your favorite show while he sits above you and practices all of the styles.

- he will buy you whatever you want to cover your head: scarves, hats, wigs, whatever. He won’t let you spend a penny of your own money on it either. He gets you a whole wardrobe of things to choose from.

- and when you’re not wearing those, he makes sure to love on you just as much. He still holds you the same, he still kisses your forehead and ravages your neck and massages circles into your back. He still falls asleep in the crook of your neck.

Marc Spector:

- will love you harder. That’s all that he knows how to do. When you start showing insecurity, when you start refusing to go out without a hat on or your hair up in a bun, he showers you with so much love you could drown in it.

- he’ll shave his head with you, if it comes to that. He’s used to the buzz cut from the marines anyway, and knows that the gesture means more than his appearance anyway.

- He helps you with the practical parts of it all. When your scalp hurts too much for you to brush your hair, he’ll finger-comb it down, whispering sweet nothings and making sure that he’s not hurting you. He’ll plant kisses on your neck and back while you finish getting ready, telling you how beautiful you are and how he just can’t keep his hands off.

- When you cry, he’ll cry with you. He can’t help himself. But you can’t help but feel loved and wanted no matter how much it seems unlikely, because Marc loves you so deeply that he’s almost an extension of you. Everything you feel, he feels. He never wants you to feel unwanted. Ever.

Jake Lockey

- never, for one second, makes you feel any less beautiful. He doesn’t just shower you with affection, he lusts over you like a bitch in heat. Constantly, publicly, aggressively. If you aren’t blushing, he knows he’s got work to do.

- He will be the one to shave your head, when that time comes. He will pause several times through the process, to either hold you or kiss you, or just to take a breath and cry with you. When you’re finished, he’ll stand at the mirror with you and tell you how stunning you are. Forever and always.

- Somehow, he will make you laugh about it. He’ll make the air so light that you forget how to cry. The humor isn’t just a way to cope, it’s a way to heal. Jake makes you laugh not to mask your fear or grief, but to build something joyful in and of itself.

Listen… there’s a lot going on. I don’t think I’m going to have to shave my head or anything, I just needed to do this. It’s one of those things that you don’t mourn about publicly, I don’t know. It’s not something my friends or family really care about right now. It’s just scary to me. And my head hurts.

#moon knight #steven grant #marc spector #jake lockley #moon knight x you #steven grant x reader #moon knight x reader #oscar isaac #steven grant x you #jake lockley x reader #jake lockley x you #moon boys #masterlist #moon night fanfiction #lunar therapy

[fandom-addict404]

Anxiety’s One Hell of a Problem II

It’s the fourth and everyone’s there. Julia, Adam, Jeremiah, Conrad, Laurel, who also brought Cleveland, Belly, Steven, and even a couple of Belly’s deb friends were in town.

The party is bustling with some in the pool, conversation taking place all over the property, and their catered food—since Susannah always did all of the cooking—being shared amongst the people.

Everyone knows it’s different. They all can feel it in the air, the tension, the awkwardness. But Conrad wasn’t only feeling the tension in the air but in himself. He keeps thinking back to Steven saying, ‘have you ever thought of therapy?’ That singular comment has been taking up his mind for days and he can’t seem to shake it.

“Hey, Conrad! What’s up, man?” Cleveland greets, handing Conrad a plate of crackers and various cheeses.

“Oh, hey, Cleveland! How are you? How’s that…uh…book coming?”

“It’s good! You know, those sailing lessons or yours are really coming in handy. Very informative.”

“I uh…I didn’t know you’d be in town.”

“Laurel actually invited me and I thought I’d stop by and say ‘hello’ and see how it’s going.” Cleveland says. Conrad sees that Cleveland has started growing his beard back, with the little stubbles of gray hairs coming in along his mustache and chin area.

“Oh! Laurel, huh.”

Cleveland lets out a nervous yet amused laugh. “Yes, Laurel. I don’t know yet but—“

“Well, you didn’t hear it from me but I’m really rooting for you guys.”

“Are you now?”

“Yeah! Laurel likes you and you clearly like her too.”

“Clearly?”

“Yeah! You’re all goo-goo-ga-ga over her.”

“Says you! I’ve been seeing you stealing glances at Belly all day—“

Conrad’s heart stops for a moment as he clenches his hands onto the platter. “It’s not like that. She’s with Jeremiah.”

Cleveland clears his throat uncomfortably, a pang of guilt hitting his stomach. “Hey, I’m sorry, man. I didn’t know.”

“No, no it’s okay. I’m just going to—“ Conrad sputters looking in the opposite direction towards some people near the pool.

“Hey, Conrad?”

“Yeah?”

“If you ever need to talk, you can always call me. You know that, right?”

“Yeah, I know that. Thanks, Cleveland.”

“You know, when I was dealing with really bad depression, talking to someone—just being able to vocalize that… pain—was really helpful. Losing someone is really hard and—“

“Yeah, I know, Cleveland. Thanks.” Conrad says, cutting Cleveland off. He couldn’t take hearing one more person trying to be his personal psychologist and overanalyze him. Sure Cleveland helped him through his first panic attack during that hot summer day on the boat—one of his weakest moments in Conrad’s opinion—but he wasn’t about to make this all about him. He knew he meant well but he wasn’t about to abandon Jeremiah and Belly when they needed him. Not now and not ever.

Conrad nods and nervously walks off. He takes a breath, rubbing his chest with the heel of his palm and heads for inside where he sees Steven talking with Taylor. Steven is slyly smiling with her as she throws her head back laughing.

Conrad was planning on just walking past them, as they seem to be preoccupied but then Steven spots him and waves him over.

“Hey, man! Sup?” Steven greets, handing him a glass of some beverage, noticing Conrad’s hand rubbing his chest. He hands him his cup of water. “Thirsty?”

Conrad takes it, noticing that his throat has suddenly gone dry.

“Yeah. Thanks, man.” He takes a sip, letting the water cascade down his throat. “How are you? Getting ready for college?”

“Yeah! I’ve been shopping and visited the campus a couple of days ago with my dad. You ready for Stanford?”

“Yeah, yeah. Gonna drive over a couple of weeks.”

“Babe, I’m gonna go find Belly but I’ll see you later, ‘kay?” Steven nods giving Taylor a quick peck before she walks off.

“So, uh…how are you doing, man?”

“I’m good—“

“No. How are you really doing? Like, for real, man.” Steven asks. “You seem…nervous, worried.”

Conrad forces the muscles around his mouth into a carefree expression, though his eyes telling a very different story.

“It’s okay— to feel on edge. The fourth has always been Susannah’s thing and I—“

Conrad leans in swiftly, his muscles in his jaw tensing. “Can you stop? Please. I really can’t do this right now.”

“Conrad—“

“I have been having essentially a 2 hour long anxiety attack, trying to get through this day, okay?! I really can’t take this right now.” He lets out a shaky half-of-a-breath, breaking eye contact with Steven.

“Exactly. Which is why you should at least consider therapy! This isn’t healthy. This suppression, constant anxiety. It’s okay to ask for help, Connie.”

Conrad froze.

Connie.

His mom used to call him that. And at that exact moment, he felt his breath stop. The tremors in his hands become visible, his vision blurring.

Though his mind is in a fog, he feels his feet carry him. To where? He has no idea. Just out of there, away from that conversation.

He ran up the stairs. He felt himself bump into people as he stumble into his bedroom, slamming the door behind him. He leans his body weight against the wall, muttering to himself, “It’s okay, it’s okay. Just breathe.” He attempts at a deep breath though it fails, only making him weaker. “Dammit. C’mon, c’mon. It’s okay. It’s just a-a. A—“ He begins pacing in his room. As his hands begin curling up he spreads his hands as wide as he can, to prevent cramping later. God, you can’t even say what it is! If, you can’t say what it is how are you supposed to stop them?! They’re never gonna end. They’ll just get worse and worse and worse and worse. And Jeremiah will find out and you’ll know how weak you really are. You aren’t any role model. You’re a weak, weak, coward who can’t even breathe—

Conrad’s spiraling was cut off by the sound of someone’s voice. At first, he doesn’t hear, however when they touch his shoulder he feels himself practically jump out of his own skin.

“Conrad? What’s wrong? Is everything okay?”

“T-Taylor?” He sputters, his voice shaking like crazy.

“How about we sit down, yeah?” She gently guides him to the bed behind him. “What’s going on? Do you know what’s happening?”

“I’m having a p-p-panic attack-k.” He stutters over the word and Taylor smiles and nods sympathetically.

“May I?” She asks, hovering her hand over his chest.

Conrad nods and she places her hand over his heart.

“Just try to take some deep breaths, okay?” Conrad nods, following Taylor’s exaggerated breathing. “See? Your heart rate is already slowing down.”

“Yeah.” Conrad replies, his throat scratchy and shaky.

“So have you had that happen before?”

“Um…yeah. A lot, actually. I really should’ve seen that coming.”

“How long?”

“Since last summer.” Conrad pauses to look at Taylor. Her usual snarky smile has been replaced with a calm and sympathetic expression. “I only had one last summer but when I got to school, they got worse, and the longer I was away from home, the more frequent and severe they got.”

“Conrad, I had no idea.”

“How would you? I didn’t want anyone to know.”

“Am I the only one?”

“No. Steven knows, helped me through one earlier this summer and…Belly is aware of one but she doesn’t know…”

“How often they are.”

“Yeah.”

“You gonna come back down or?”

“I think i’m just gonna stay up here for a bit.”

“Yeah, of course.”

“Oh, and if you ever need to talk to someone or feel your anxiety get worse, you can always talk to me but I would highly recommend talking to a professional.”

“Like a therapist?”

“Yeah. It really helped me through my parents’ divorce. Working out all my shit and stuff.”

“I‘ll think about it.” Conrad says. “And Taylor?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for helping me. I know you’re not my biggest fan so it means a lot. Truly.”

“No sweat off my back. Plus, this kind of helps.”

“How?”

“Well, now I know you’re not just some random dick, you’ve got shit.”

Conrad chuckles, almost smiling. “Yeah. I’ve got shit for sure.”

Taylor leaves, closing the door behind her, leaving Conrad in his bedroom.

After a moment or so, Conrad looks up “therapists near me” in the google search bar and starts looking through the results.

He then changes his search to “therapists near Stanford University.” and finds a therapist that’s not only near the university but works through the school so he gets it free of charge. Part of the school’s mission and such.

Though there’s still a slight pull on his chest. A new feeling starts to form. Hope. Hope for a happier future, lighter heart, and hope for freedom from all the shit that’s happened to him in the past year and a half.

Could Conrad be…happy? free?

There’s only one way to find out.

#the summer i turned pretty #tsitp #conrad fisher #mental health #tsitpedit #belly x conrad #belly conklin #panic attacks #anxiety #anxiety disorder #panic disorder #therapy #men’s mental health #mental health awareness #taylor madison jewel #taylor jewel #anxiety attack #steven conklin #jeremiah fisher #fanfiction #fanfic #tsitp 2 #laurel x cleveland #cleveland castillo #cleveland tsitp #therapist #psychology #standford university #brown university #bonrad

[espresso-arts-and-writes]

This is another art I did for my fanfic Who Are You Really? A fusion between Mabel and Steven, aka Maven!

#steven universe #steven universe future #steven needs therapy #mabel pines #gravity falls mabel #su gf crossover #su x gf crossover #Queued post

[bjornensuckler]

I think I might start making posts, probably like incorrect quotes or writings. Stay tuned and I will try my best!

#the owl house #deltarune #camp camp #vincent the secret of myers #therapy with dr albert krueger #gravity falls #undertale #x reader #obey me #steven universe #d:bh #incorrect quotes #my hero acedamia #demon slayer #jujutsu kaisen #osomatsu san #If you wanna make a request or something please do #I'll make a request post later probably

[loganslowdown4]

Me giggling after remembering Larry and Dot were named this because LarryDot rhymes with Peridot 😂😂

I totally ship Dorry tho, that’s still a cute name haha

#cartoon therapy #thomas sanders #Larry x Dot #LarryDot #peridot #Steven universe #su peridot #ts Larry #ts dot #ts dorry #dorry #cartoon therapy Ep 1

[mahalshairyballs]

Ah no Bad Therapist is changing my story plans ><

(okay she's definitely not as bad as the therapists Marc got in the comics, but she does give some questionable advices. Especially to Steven, who's the most receptive to them...)

She decided to give a very bad advice to Steven earlier than she was supposed to in the story. Which changes a lot of things lol. I guess it'll prevent Jake and Marc to have that setback in their relationship. And now Steven won't have his turn of hiding in their mind.

Last night I kept myself awake by thinking about the worst case scenario of that change. The Bad Advice Steven got from their therapist was that it was unhealthy for Marc and Steven to be in a relationship and Steven should end it to allow Marc to grow.

Steven didn't think anything was wrong with their relationship before that, because there isn't, but he got slowly convinced. He's easy to sway if you convince him it's for the good of the people he cares about.

(In my worst case scenario Steven broke up with Marc, and to say Marc didn't take it well would be an understatement. Jake became the mediator between them and he hated that.)

.

In the not-as-bad version of that scenario, which would be more likely, Steven would just think about it for a long time, trying to muster the courage to actually break up, and getting depressed about it. Everyone around him noticed, of course, that his mood took a nosedive. Before actually doing it though, Steven talked it through with Layla. She was actually surprised by what Steven told her. She couldn't see what was happening between them in their mind, but out there their relationship was looking really good. Layla doubted their relationship was unhealthy for Marc, since it hadn't made Marc spend more time in their innerspace, quite the opposite. He was fronting more, seemed to be doing way better, and it even made Marc more attentive towards her and their own relationship.

Then Steven talked it through with Marc. He tried to give him the reasoning behind all this, so Marc would end up at the same conclusion their therapist had. Marc didn't. Marc didn't want to break up. Even though he often said early in their relationship that it felt weird, he never felt that it was wrong. Steven then told him that Layla thought their relationship was helping Marc, was it ?

Marc responded that he was at a better place now that he'd been in years, and their relationship was clearly making Steven happy. So if there seemed to be only benefits to it, and all of them were satisfied with that relationship, and some negative aspects might be present but none of them saw any, who cared if it was healthy or unhealthy? All signs pointed to how they should stay together.

Steven was very satisfied with that answer. He had been desperately looking for a reason, a way, to stay with Marc after all.

He'd tell their therapist that they wouldn't be breaking up on their next appointment.

.

Marc went ahead of Steven for that one, and requested an impromptu meeting with their therapist. Just to let her know that they wouldn't be needing her services anymore. She tried to take Steven away from him, and that he couldn't tolerate. He already didn't trust therapists, and after that shit? They were better off without one.

Steven wasn't happy to learn the following week that Marc had canceled any further appointments with their therapist. Marc said they didn't need any therapist, they had each other. Steven pointed out that she had been useful to them before, she had helped Marc and his relationship with Jake.

'Yeah but this time she was out of line' Marc replied

'Maybe she couldn't help us further, maybe we need to find another psych doctor better suited for us' Steven said in turn.

And so they started looking for another therapist to get the best one this time

#today it's the opposite fic post of yesterday #all narration no dialogues lmao #moon knight fanfic #moon knight fic #moon knight fic plans #moon knight fic ideas #steven grant x marc spector #cw ableism #cw mistrust of therapy #steven grant #steven grant tries his best #we love our neuroatypical british nerd angel here #marc spector #marc spector deserves everything #layla x steven x marc #cw bad advices by therapist

[s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s]

Hi Friends. Quick update on my life. I'm very excited about having new music to share, but I just wanted to let you know that one of the reasons why I haven't been able to participate in the press and promotion leading up to the release of Javelin is bc I am in the hospital. Last month I woke up one morning and couldn't walk. My hands, arms and legs were numb and tingling and I had no strength, no feeling, no mobility. My brother drove me to the ER and after a series of tests—MRIs, EMGs, cat scans, X-rays, spinal taps (!), echo-cardiograms, etc.—the neurologists diagnosed me with an auto immune disorder called Guillain-Barre Syndrome. Luckily there's treatment for this — they administer immuno-hemoglobin infusions for five days and pray that the disease doesn't spread to the lungs, heart and brain. Very scary, but it worked. I spent about two weeks in Med/Surg, stuck in a bed, while my doctors did all the things to keep me alive and stabilize my condition. I owe them my life.

On September 8, I was transferred to acute rehab, where I am now undergoing intensive physical therapy/occupational therapy, strength building etc. to get my body back in shape and to learn to walk again. It's a slow process, but they say I will "recover," it just takes a lot of time, patience, and hard work. Most people who have GBS learn to walk again on their own within a year, so I am hopeful. I'm only in my second week of rehab but it is going really well and I am working really hard to get back on my feet. I'm committed to getting better, I'm in good spirits, and I'm surrounded by a really great team. I want to be well!

I'll keep you posted as I progress. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. And a huge shout out to all the incredible caretakers of the world working night and day to help us heal. They are living saints.

Be well, be joyful, stay sane, stay safe. I love you.

yours truly from a wheelchair XOXOXO Sufjan Stevens

[two-sides-halved]

How do you deal with crushing unbearable jealousy? Asking for a friend.

Classic Steven looked at the other and tried to give his best reply.

"Ok, so crushing unbearable jealousy sounds pretty bad... I guess I would try and think about what exactly is making you jealous and try to get help for yourself so you don't feel jealous any more?"

#budding questions deserve blooming answers ~ [ answered asks ] #ever compassionate ~ [ ic x classic steven ] #show yourself ~ [ anonymous ] #local hybrid child tells you to get therapy since he's got no idea how to help #the other two have no idea how to help either

[whatthefishh]

C*ck Therapy

Therapist Steven Grant x patient!camgirl!female reader

Warnings: 18+, taboo relationship, therapist-patient sexual relations, c*ck warming, p in v, unprotected, mentions of cam girl activities, mentions of masturbation, mentions of oral (f rec), umm.. how else do I tag this. Brat taming Steven.

Just 1.8k words of horniness I’m sorry. Beta’d by the lovely @melodygatesauthor

“I’m not moving until you tell me what’s got you so angry, love,” he said while gripping your hips down onto his, not letting you roll them the way you longed to.

See, Steven used to be your therapist. He used to be your kind, respectful, and attentive therapist for about 4 months but that quickly changed when you decided to divulge your secondary income source – your premium content. Subscription based content. Adult modeling. Your camgirl side hustle. Whatever you wanted to call it.

He didn’t take the information as well as you were hoping, stuttering and blushing and not meeting your eyes, and you felt uncomfortable, thinking he was judging you for it. In actuality, Steven had found your profile a few weeks prior to your confession, and couldn’t help but palm himself to your entire content library. He’d never come harder than he had on the first night he stumbled upon one of your videos. It wasn’t long before he became addicted to the way you fell apart on camera.

He knew it was wrong, he knew it was probably against some rule about him being your therapist but he couldn’t help it. You were so intelligent in your sessions with him, always providing great insight on your own issues. You were one of his favourite patients. He was really happy with the progress you were making, and well… Steven couldn’t deny that you were beautiful. He was sure you were well aware of your beauty, so he never fancied himself someone you’d find attractive, especially considering the nature of your relationship. It was sort of forbidden. No, it was forbidden. The guilt didn’t stop him from subscribing to you though.

In your sessions, he never made you feel uncomfortable, he never gave away that he knew about your secret side gig, and he honestly wanted to help you. Steven was genuine in his career, he loved listening to you open up to him. He didn’t think his guilty addiction to you was hindering your growth until you mentioned your videos and apparently it showed on his face. He began stumbling over his words, trying desperately to explain that he wasn’t judging you. When you told him he was making a ‘cringe face’, he was forced to admit that he was actually cringing at himself, not at you. It was a painful few moments for you both.

Long story short, he couldn’t keep seeing you in his office, and decided some private sessions in his home were more appropriate. They usually started off with him bending you over the couch and then asking you how your day went as he righted your clothing, or kissing you messily the second you walked through the door, only to ravenously eat you out on the closest surface he could find. He was insatiable. Half your sessions were him just whining and whimpering about how delicious you were and how he couldn’t believe you were really letting him do this to you. Steven still let you talk, still listened to your issues and still tried to therapize you. It was just after he fucked your brains out.

You came over with an attitude today, irritated by external factors and you were looking forward to Steven fucking it out of your system. When you tried to initiate it with him, to get him to give you what you needed, he pulled back to look at you in concern. He offered to talk first, and you got angry and scoffed in his face, ripping yourself from his grasp. He conceded, telling you to take your frustrations out on him as he sat on the couch you usually laid down on in your sessions, patting his thighs in invitation. You were supposed to ride him, putting all your energy into it and watching his brows furrow as he watched his length disappear inside you again and again.

Today, he was hell-bent on you cockwarming him, claiming it was supposed to get you talking quicker but you were highly doubting the validity of his statement with the way his cock was twitching inside you every few minutes. Your slick was coating your thighs and the hairs at the base of his member, flowing more freely the longer he sat unmoving inside your hot channel. Infuriatingly, he held your hips down with his impossible strength, looking up at you with those sweet brown eyes of his as he repeated his question. Shit, what was the question?

“Hmmm?” you managed, after another unsuccessful attempt at rolling your hips.

“I said, what’s got you so angry today, love? Talk to me. I’ll make it worth it, I promise, but first you have to be good and tell me what’s wrong,” he urged, nudging your chin with his shapely nose.

You had inhale deeply, your breathlessness making it hard for you to speak. God, he really was so thick, wasn’t he? He was filling you up so perfectly, stretching you out at this angle and you had to close your eyes to even think about what you were going to say.

“That girl at work… the one I told you about who leaves all her shit for me to clean up after her shift–”

“Mhmm, keep talking, love,” the vibrations from his chest felt like an electric shock through your body, your back arching at the sensations.

“Ahhh, she-she made a mistake, and blamed me… and, and then I got reamed out by my stupid manager,” you were close to crying now, the anger subsiding slowly, and the feeling of being denied by Steven taking over.

“Ohh, sweetheart, s’not right, is it?” He brushed your hair back and rubbed your cheekbone with his thumb, and you couldn’t help but lean into his palm like a cat needing affection. “S’not your fault. Tell you what, maybe you should quit.”

“Maybe you should fuck me, come on, Steven, just–just make it go away, I need you,” you were whining pathetically, ready to let your fists land on his chest in a rage.

Steven tutted at you. He tutted, like you were a petulant child, like you were just having a tantrum, like a teacher gently disciplining a student, not like you were sitting on his cock, leaking all over him and the couch, staining the taupe suede material with your juices. Leaning forward to softly mouth at your neck, he whispers against it and lets his lips graze your skin.

“I wouldn’t be a good therapist if I didn’t let you talk about it first, would I? That’s not very ‘healing comes from within’ of me,” he laughed at the end of it, his hot breath burning you even further.

Oh, you hate him. You tightened your core when he laughed against you, the rumbling causing his cock to shift slightly and you let out a soft moan at the smallest amount of friction it granted you, and he unwillingly thrust upwards at the feeling. Oh, you knew how to get back at him.

Clenching around him again, you wait for his reaction as your lips touch the shell of his ear, whimpering, as he garbled out a choked out groan against your neck. Steven’s hips unwittingly thrust upwards again, knocking into your cervix just that small amount, enough to make you dig your nails into his shoulders where your hands were resting. You were both moaning now, and you think you can tease him like this until he finally gave in and fucked you from under you. You needed him to, therapy be damned.

Dragging your hands up into his hair, he shuddered when your nails scraped across his scalp. He licked his lips, the edge of his tongue grazing your neck before he pulled back to look into your eyes and the previous soft look he was giving you was gone, replaced with a heady look, eyelids low as his mouth was open and panting.

“No, but considering that you’re inside me right now, I’d say you’re halfway there,” you gasp as his hand shifts down to your ass, squeezing, fingers splayed wide and pulling at the flesh there.

You lean more into his chest, your breasts pressing into him now, his mouth sitting just so, dipping down to mouth at them through your top. Steven’s control was slowly slipping, his idea failing spectacularly as he pulled your hips to roll and grind on his. You squeezed your muscles around his thick and throbbing cock again, trying to entice him to pull out to the tip and buck up into you like you wished he would. You were gripping him so tight, and your slick was more than enough to make his movements smooth and yet Steven was holding back from giving you his all, his logic lost on you.

“Steven, please, I’m sorry for being short with you, I’m sorry, okay? Please just–”

You were cut off from your helpless begging when he decided he’d had enough, that you had suffered enough, that you learnt your lesson and that the anger you walked in with was gone, along with his restraint. Steven gripped your ass even tighter, his fingers pressing divots into your skin as he thrust up into you mercilessly, bouncing you on his length as you cried out for him.

His hands were squeezing you, keeping you wide open for him as he rendered you incoherent, pathetic moans and whines leaving you. With your mouth still close to his ear, your noises began spurring him on as he grunted with each pass of his cock into your hot cunt, desperate to reach his end. Your hands began bunching his blazer lapels, angry in the back of your head that he didn’t even take off his jacket when he sat you on his thick shaft. Your soft walls began fluttering around him, signaling that you were almost reaching your end, his relentless teasing having caught up with you now, hurtling you towards the edge quicker.

“Ohh, ffffuck, Steven I’m gonna–gonna come, yes,” you shouted, so close to your euphoria that you were desperate to reach. The way his cock was punching up into your cervix was just perfect, his smell overwhelming you, his hands squeezing you just right, everything was leading to this and you couldn’t help but whine when his thumb swiped at your clit once, twice–

You were coming hard.

His grunts and groans were muffled into your chest, his thrusts getting sloppy while he chased his own release, pulling your hips down to his so hard it almost hurt. Steven bucked his hips one final time before you felt the telltale pulsing inside of you, the warmth of his cum slowly trickling out from where you were still sheathed around him. He pulled back to look at it with brows raised, almost impressed at his own mess while still catching his breath.

“How are you feeling now, love? Still angry at me?”

“I wasn’t angry at you, Steven,” you sigh dazedly, shaking your head at him. “Silly man. But to answer your question, I’m feeling much better now that you’re done torturing me.”

#Steven grant smut #steven grant fanfiction #steven grant x you #steven grant x reader #moonknight smut #moon knight smut #moonknight x reader #moonknight fanfiction #moon knight x reader #moon knight x you #steven grant fic #steven grant x fem!reader #mona writes???

[xcaptain-winterx]

Requests are open you say? How about Steve Rogers having a huge crush on the new recruit (reader) and being very awkward in trying to pursue her

Be a man

Steve Rogers x reader

summary: above

warnings: fluff, awkwardness, shy Steve, cum

a/n: English is not my first language, meaning you will probably find a lot of misspelling etc.

Part 2

Main Masterlist Steve Rogers Masterlist

Steven Grant Rogers also known as the hero Captain America. Fought against Hydra and their leader Red Skull, his brainwashed best friend, Ultron, his own team and even Thanos. You would think that Americas golden boy is unstoppable, that nothing can stop him.

You’re wrong.

See, Steve has years of experience in fighting due to the fact that he’s over a hundred years old and fought in World War Two. The only thing he doesn’t know about, or to be more specific, doesn’t have any experience with, is the opposite sex. Steve has never been on a date or had a real first kiss. Ok, yeah, he kissed Peggy and Natasha once, but that meant nothing. God, he’s still a virgin.

To sum it up, Steve is an awkward bean around women. He doesn’t always show it obviously, but ask him something not work related with a flirty smile, and he starts to sweats like a polar bear in the desert.

Steve always thought that he was going to be able to talk to ‘the girl’ once he saw her, that he will have no problem to communicate with her.

He thought wrong.

Steve is in the training room, punching the punching bag until it falls off again. He was supposed to be training with Sam, but he hasn’t shown up. So far, Sam always showed up or at least texted him if something came in between and he couldn’t make it. Steve stops hitting the punching bag and goes over to the bench where his phone is laying. He picks it up and swipes it open, seeing that he didn’t receive any text message from Sam.

It’s not normal for Sam to be late, so Steve decides that he’s going to look for Sam. He puts his phone in his pocket and walks out of the gym, in the direction of the living area.

As he walks down the hallway Bucky crosses his path, “Hey pal, have you seen Sam”, Steve asks.

“No, but I can imagine he’s talking to the new recruits, telling them something about teamwork makes the dream work, or some other shit”, Bucky says, mimicking Sam’s voice.

Steve’s brows furrow; what new recruits? Steve heard nothing about new recruits. “I don’t know anything about new recruits?”

“Transferred from a SHIELD base in Germany, I think. Sam will probably force us to introduce us to them”, Bucky says. Steve knows that it’s hard for Bucky to talk or communicate with new and many people at once, but he knows that he’s trying his best. Since he began going to therapy, his old self made more and more of an appearance, and Bucky feels a lot better in general even though it’s hard sometimes. He’s proud of Bucky. He’s trying his best.

“Better we do it now than later. Come on, Buck”, Steve says, patting his shoulder, and pulling him with him.

Bucky lets out a chuckle, “Ok”.

Both super soldiers walk towards the meeting rooms, thinking they might be there when Bucky suddenly stops walking. Steve looks at Bucky, silently questioning why he stopped. Bucky reads Steve’s facial expression before pointing towards the end of the hallway, “found him”.

Steve follows Buckys finger and sees Sam. Sam is not alone, he’s with a woman. A beautiful woman. A goddess.

Bucky sees Steve’s face heating up. “You good, pal?” he asks with a teasing voice. Steve doesn’t answer him, to lost in the woman’s beauty next to Sam. Bucky snaps his fingers in front of Steve’s face, trying to get him back to reality, but it doesn’t work.

Lost in thoughts, or to be more specific the woman, Steve doesn’t see how Sam noticed them too, and is calling them over.

“Steve!”

Steve comes back to reality when Sam calls him for the third time. Bucky laughs at Steve’s confused puppy stare, looking like he just woke up from a coma without any knowledge of what happened before. It gets worse as they see how Sam and the woman are now walking towards them. Bucky feels Steve panicking next to him. “Hey Steve, calm down, ok?” Bucky whispers to him.

“Mhm”, Steve answers, not being able to form any words. Sam and the Woman getting closer and closer to them.

“Remember, we just introduce ourselves” Bucky tries to calm him down, his own anxiety leaving and instead focusing on helping his friend, “You can do this. Just remember to think and talk at the same time, and don’t just stare at her”. If his friend wasn’t looking like a dead fish Bucky would’ve really enjoyed this moment. Him helping his friend talk to a woman like he did back in the 40s, but nothing about Steve’s current problem is funny. Well, maybe the fact that he for real looks like a dead fish.

“Ok” Steve says.

“Ok”

“Ok”

“You can do this, Steve”

“Ok”

And the woman gets closer and closer.

Steve begins to murmur what he wants to say, making Bucky look nervously at him.

The woman and Sam are now almost completely by them as Steve suddenly says, “I need to finish the mission report”, before sprinting the other direction.

“Hey, why did Steve-“ Sam can’t finish because Bucky is already sprinting after Steve, leaving him and the woman utterly confused. “BUCKY!”

Sam puts his hands on his hips, “normally they are not like this, ok? They probably just remembered to take their anti-aging cream”. He turns to you, “Super soldiers, you know”.

You smile as Sam claps your shoulders and says, “how about I show you the training room?”. You nod, letting him lead you to the training room.

Meanwhile, Steve is sprinting towards his room, looking like a gazelle who’s running away from a predator. Steve thought he could talk to her, but no.

Once he reaches his room, he locks the door, and then just stands there, staring at the locked door; what just happened? He begins to hyperventilate like how his pre serum self did when he had an asthma attack. The room feels like it’s shrinking. Steve feels small and scared. Just the sight of the woman made him with a snap of a finger feel like his weak 40s self before the serum. Back when no one liked him.

While Steve is having a panic attack, Bucky is running towards Steve’s room. Bucky started running after him some seconds after he sprinted away, and normally Bucky would’ve caught up to him, but Steve’s panic and the super soldier serum made it a bit difficult. Luckily, Bucky knows Steve like no one else and knows that he’s hiding in his room.

“Steve?” Bucky asks, knocking on the door. “You good, pal? Can I come in?”. He waits, but no answer comes, so he tries opening the door but it’s locked.

Bucky sighs, “Steve, let me in”.

On the other side, Steve is debating if he should let his best friend in. His debating goes too long for Bucky though because the next thing Steve hears is Bucky saying ‘Friday unlock the door’, and the door opens.

Bucky walks in, seeing a teared eyed Steve who’s breathing fast and heavy. Bucky strikes over to him and pulls him slowly down to the floor, sitting face to face with each other. He takes his hand and puts it on his heart, “Steve, hey. Focus on me. Focus on my heartbeat. You feel mine?” Bucky says, putting his other hand on Steve’s heart, feeling how his heart is still beating fast. “Steve, focus on my heartbeat”.

Steve looks at his friend and tries to focus on his heart. He closes his eyes, only trying to listen to Bucky’s heartbeat. “Yeah, I feel it”.

Bucky gives him a smile, “ok, good”.

They sit in silent for a few minutes, Steve’s heart beating now slower and his breaths coming out normally.

Bucky waits until Steve’s heartbeat is fully back to normal before asking “better?”.

Steve nods, “I didn’t think we would have had to use that method on me”, he says chuckling.

This calming method showed Bucky’s therapist, Steve. She told him that it would help Bucky calm down when he’s having a panic attack, and it did in fact help. The night after she explained it to him, Bucky woke up from a nightmare and started to panic. Steve’s room is right next to him, so he heard his friend’s panic. He tried the method that night and it worked perfectly. It took some while until Bucky calmed down, but it was way faster than without the method, and Bucky was able to fall asleep again after.

To other people, this method may look a bit weird, but it calms his best friend down, so who cares? It’s also no surprise that Steve is the only one allowed to do this method. Sam once tried it and Bucky punched him in his face when he put his hand on his chest. Sam left the room angrily and annoyed with a broken bloody nose. Bucky punched him with his metal arm. He thought Sam was in danger that second and in a state of danger he uses his metal arm. Bucky apologized to Sam though, and he truly felt bad and sorry. Sam instantly forgave him though, he knows it wasn’t his intention.

At least not in that situation.

Bucky even ‘baked’ Sam some brownies. Well, more like bought some Brownies and said he baked them. Sam knew he didn’t, but said nothing and just enjoyed eating some good, tasteless brownies with a smile on his face.

“Well, we didn’t think you would ever run away from a girl”.

Steve sighs, “Yeah. Back then, they would run away from me. Now it’s me running away”

“Why did you?”

Steve shakes his head. “I don’t know. I got scared I guess?”.

When Steve looks at Bucky again, he comes to face with a blank stare. It kinda reminds him of Bucky’s winter soldier stare. If they weren’t having an emotional and serious conversation, Steve would’ve been actually concerned that something happened that made Bucky go into Winter Soldier mindset.

Bucky scares Steve when he suddenly jumps up, “You know what” he pulls Steve up, almost making him fall over “You will have that girl”.

“Huh?” he asks, confused.

“Or just someone”.

He doesn’t like the thought of Bucky helping him. Bucky was a true player back then, a gentleman, but a player.

“I help you talk to women. I can do that. I did that a hundred years ago” he stops when he realizes “fucking hell, that’s a long time ago”.

Steve scowls, “Language, Buck”.

“Sorry”.

“I get that you’re trying to help me, and I appreciate that” Steve takes a deep breath before continuing, “but I can’t”

“Why?” Bucky asks crossing his arms, standing like an angry parent.

“I just can’t, ok? Also, colleges are not allowed to be in a romantic relationship”.

“Then look for someone else. There’s this woman named Leah. She works at my favorite sushi place and I heard-“

“I don’t want someone else!”

Bucky raises an eyebrow, a teasing grin on his face. “Ohhhh, so you want her. Ok, Steven. I see you”. He winks at Steve as he groans.

“I didn’t say that. I just-ugh, I like her, but-there’s not gonna be anything between us” he tries to give his best friend a reassuring smile, but knowingly fails. “You can ask Leah out”, Steve tries changing the topic.

“No, she’s not my type”.

Bucky knows that Steve won’t stop having a crush on the new recruit. It took Steve a hundred years to get over Peggy. He was still in love with her even after being unfrozen. Now imagine he’s thinking about the new recruit until he dies. Bucky doesn’t want that. God, he was honestly happy when Peggy passed. That woman was like a snake slithering her way into his friends heart only to poison it. He didn’t like her from the second she interrupted Steve and his conversation. Dumb Bitch.

He wants his friend to be happy. He wants to be an uncle. He hopes Steve will get himself together and talk to her.

“Ok. Whatever you say”, Bucky says, patting him on his shoulder. They continue talking, but this time about what movie they are going to watch for their ‘we need to learn about cinematic history’ movie night. While talking, Bucky’s mind continues to wander back to their original conversation, and about the fact that Steve doesn’t want some dating teaching from him. In all honesty, he’s slightly hurt by that.

He could still help him somehow, though.

It’s been a week now since he saw the new recruit and he’s been trying to avoid any situation that could lead to him seeing her. Steve knows it sounds silly, but he’s scared of her. Scared of seeing her. Scared of her seeing him. He hasn’t been training for a week. Steve knows the chances are high that she will be there. The only sort of trying he did this week was going for a run. Alone.

Sam noticed a change in Steve. Everybody did. Steve was never a huge extrovert and now he’s such an introvert. He doesn’t even eat with them anymore because she could be there, or just walk past them eating.

Today he needs to be brave, though. Bucky asked him to train together because he’s the only good match for him. Bucky told him that winning against Sam slowly starts to get boring, and that Steve needs to train again. Cardio is good, but Steve needs to do more.

After trying to convince Bucky that they can also train outside or anywhere else than the training room, he knew from Bucky’s reaction that it’s not gonna happen. So now he’s on his way to meet Bucky in the training room.

To say Steve is nervous is an understatement, he’s almost shitting his pants.

Bucky assured him they would have the room for themselves and Steve just hopes that that’s true.

Steve walks into the gym and surprisingly sees no one. No Bucky. Steve was already late because he was nervous, so it confuses him why Bucky isn’t here. He looks at the clock on the wall and sees that he’s sixteen minutes late, meaning Bucky is to late too.

“Maybe he’s still asleep”, Steve tells himself. Technically, he would be happy that Bucky is able to sleep, but it’s the first time since a week that he’s training and last time, Sam already didn’t come.

He is just about to go to Bucky’s room when he hears a soft voice.

“Well, it’s only seven in the morning”.

Steve turns around and freezes.

It’s the woman

Oh, no no no no no

“Every normal person would be asleep at this time”.

Steve is unable to speak, he’s just staring at her. Not even blinking, just staring.

She looks at him with a smile, waiting for an answer, or just something.

When Steve realizes that she’s waiting for an answer, he clears his throat. “Yeah, uhm-I uh, I mean he likes to sleep-uh- he can’t sleep that much and-uhm yeah. He normally only uhm-sleeps with me- Wait not like that-uh I mean, he just likes to sleep with me-no. He uhm, he sleeps better with-me-uhm because I’m a good sleep partner- no, I just-uhm. IM NOT GAY”.

Steve looks at her with wide eyes. He knows he just made a fool of himself, so he tries to save himself.

Tries.

“There’s obviously nothing wrong with liking-uhm men, but I’m not like that. Yeah, uhm I hate men- wait not hate men, I like them, but platonic like ha ha. I like woman. But I’m not a relationship-I uhm”, he doesn’t want to look like he is desperate for a relationship. She could think that he’s trying to ‘hit on her’. He believes that what it’s called, but you can never trust Tony. “I’m not into relationship- uhm, the romantic, uh, kind-just the other kind”

Now she looks at him with wide eyes. The only other non-relationship kind she can think of is the sexual one. She can’t believe that Captain Rogers, the golden boy, is such a man. The worst part is that Steve doesn’t understand what he just said and instead looks at her with a nervous smile. Poor boy thought it sounded more like normal relationship, platonic kind. It didn’t, though.

“You do you, I guess” she says, feeling incredibly uncomfortable. She didn’t think her first time meeting Captain America would be like this.

Steve sees that she’s not comfortable or at least confused by what he’s saying. Maybe she doesn’t like his answer.

So he continues to try to fix this conversation.

“I uhm I would like a relationship-with someone-uh I want to-“ he can’t say dancing, that sounds boring. He needs to come up with something that everyone does these days. Something that she would probably like “do Netflix and chill”.

Steve needs to get better at telling when he can trust Tony and when not.

“Oh, uhm” she doesn’t know what to say “that’s nice I guess”.

Right now, Steve would rather fight against HYDRA than talk to her. He can feel how he’s sweating. And if that already isn’t bad enough, he starts to really look at her. Oh boy.

She’s wearing tight black leggings with a matching black sport bra. She must’ve been already training for a while because he sees some drops of sweat on her chest area, running to her cleavage. Steve is directly looking at her cleavage, not taking his eyes off it.

He doesn’t notice that he’s looking at it, well, that he’s so obviously looking at it.

She puts her left hand on her right shoulder, acting like she’s massaging it, and not like she’s trying to cover her chest.

Steve’s eyes move to hers, and it only takes three seconds until realization hits him.

“Shit!” he screams, making her jump “oh, I’m sorry I didn’t want to scare you-I uhm, and I didn’t want to stare at your you know-chest. Not because they are not pretty, they are-NO Uhmmm, they uh. It’s just”.

Steve stops talking when the door opens and Bucky walks in with a smile on his face “Language, Steve. Good morning you two”. At least someone is having one.

“Morning”, she says, smiling at his best friend before walking away to lift some weight. Deep down they are both happy that Bucky saved them from the awkward situation, though, Steve is also sad because he wanted to talk to her, to have a chance, but he failed.

Bucky smiles after her, then turns to Steve. “Hey Steve, how are you?”

“You knew, didn’t you” Steve almost spats, his voice echoing throughout the training room. He turns around and sees how she is looking at them.

He quickly turns back around, facing Bucky, who just gives him an innocent smile. “What do you mean Steve?”. Bucky knows that Steve can’t say anything about that, due to the fact that she can hear everything they are saying.

Steve glares at him, grinding his teeth. “That you would be late”, he lies.

“Yeah”.

Steve wants to scream, but he can’t “why didn’t you tell me?” he asks, his veins showing.

“I texted you, Punk”, Bucky says as he walks over to get a punching bag.

Steve frowns; Bucky didn’t text him. He pulls out his phone.

Love❤️‍🔥- I’ll be a bit late

Send one minute ago

Steve cringes as he sees the name Tony and Sam saved Bucky on his phone. He would rather want Punk with that heart. Platonic style. He doesn’t know how to change it, though.

“Didn’t you see my message?” Bucky gives him a fake questioning expression. A teasing one.

“I must have missed it”, Steve says in a monotone voice “I mean it says you send it a minute ago. Bucky”.

“Oh, you know. The signal is quite bad here”

Steve closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “Yeah, Bucky. You would’ve thought that Tony would’ve already handled it”.

Bucky snickers “Yeah”.

“Yeah”.

Bucky walks with the bag over his shoulder towards a hook to hang the bag on. He turns to look at Steve, a grin on his face when his eyes move to look behind Steve.

“Hey, how about you help her, Steve~”, Bucky says loudly.

Steve follows his eyes and sees how the recruit is struggling with moving some weights out of her way, so she can put the bench there to do some bench presses.

She looks at them and gives them a shy smile. “That would be kinda nice”.

Steve looks back at Bucky, panic in his eyes. Bucky gives him a big smile that says ‘yes’.

It’s time, it’s time to shine, Steve. He can do that, he can easily lift that.

‘Ok, Steve. Pull your ass cheeks together and help her’ he thinks to himself as he walks towards her. He stops in front of her, getting lost in her eyes for a second. This time he snaps back quickly though and moves the weights away.

“Thank you, Captain Rogers”, she says, his back still towards her.

“Mhm” he can’t bring out a single word. Instead of turning back to her, he sorts the weights, so she doesn’t see him blushing. “You-You’re welcome”.

He hears her getting on the bench and takes that as his cue to leave.

“Hey, Steve!”

Please, don’t Bucky.

“You should help her. Stay behind her to make sure that her arms don’t give in”

Steve doesn’t turn around this time. He can hear how she doesn’t lift any weight, meaning she is looking at them.

“Yeah, I uhm would, but- mission reports. I need to finish the mission report”, Steve lies “important stuff you know. Not like helping her isn’t important, but yeah. Avenger stuff is important….”.

It’s that second that Bucky realizes that Steve is the worst person in admitting his crush he ever met. The best friend he is, he needs to help him. “Oh, I already did them for you”.

Great, now Steve’s lie is a lie. Thank you, Bucky.

“No, I don’t think you did”, he tries to save himself “They were on my desk this morning, unfinished”

Good job, Steve.

“I did them this morning. We were on the same mission, Steve. Only one of us needs to do them” Bucky says, punching the bag “I send you a message”.

“No, you didn’t-“ he looks at his phone to see a message from Bucky.

Love❤️‍🔥-already did the mission report.

Send a minute ago.

Bucky knows Steve like the back of his hand. He knew what excuses he would use to try to flee the scene. A laugh almost leaves his mouth as he sees the face Steve is making. God, he missed teasing him.

“I thought you were asleep”.

“No, I wanted to finish it. You’ve been quite stressed the past week, and I wanted to lift some weight of your shoulders”.

“Thanks, James”.

The tension between them is noticeable. So noticeable that the recruit is more uncomfortable than when she was alone with Steve.

She gets their attention when she walks past them to grab her water bottle. “Have fun training”

“You already leaving?” Steve asks disappointed, sad that she’s leaving.

“Yeah, I’ve already been training before you both came. Also, I need to find Sam. He promised to show me the rest of the compound. I only saw half of the facility so far and don’t want to get lost at some point”, she says. So far she didn’t get lost because the most important areas were already introduced to her, but it’s better to know the whole compound. “Bye” she waves them before opening the door and walking through it.

No one says anything until the door closes. Bucky is the first to break the silence, “wow”.

“I know you did that on purpose!”

“I was trying to make you talk to her” he grabs his shoulder “I just want to help you. She’s a beautiful woman-“

“Hey!”

“See” Bucky says, “you’re jealous when I just say that she’s pretty. You have a crush on that girl, Steve”.

Steve sighs in defeat. “Ok, maybe”.

“I KNEW IT” Bucky screams, jumping like a little kid on Christmas morning “FUCK YES, STEVE”

“Language”

He stops jumping and looks at him. “You will get that girl. I promise” Bucky looks like he’s about to cry “oh my god, you’re all grown up”.

Steve lets out a slight laugh. It’s almost ridiculous how happy Bucky is that there’s a girl that he kinda likes. It reminds him of how they talked about their futures when they were little. They talked about carriers and family, and how they will be called uncle Steve and uncle Bucky by their best friends kids.

“Are you crying?” he asks, seeing Bucky wipe his eye.

“Pfff, no”.

Oh, he’s definitely crying.

“Calm down, Bucky. Just because I like her doesn’t mean that she likes me”.

“Yeah, because you’re just an Avenger, the symbol of America, a super soldier, owner of America’s ass-“

“Ok, I get it”. Steve isn’t dumb, he knows that people know him, that he’s quite famous; god he sounds like Tony. All this doesn’t make him the most liked person in the world, though, and not everyone fall for him. Not just because he has blond hair and some women like dark hair, or he is to old schooled and doesn’t know every new show on Netflix, or women are not into him because they hate male genitals and prefer women’s….parts. The shield only shows what he shows the world and not the people he cares about. He doesn’t show his emotional side with all his flaws.

“You like her, right” Bucky asks, knowing the answer.

“Yes, of course, but-“

“Then you will go to her and tell her that”. Bucky claps his hands. “You will tell her how much you like her. You will take her dancing and to the movies. Understand?”

“Yes, Sargent” Steve smiles.

“I know she’s the one. You will propose to her at sunset and give me some nephews and nieces”. Steve laughs at Bucky’s hyper fixation about his crush. Both of them are acting like two teenage girls.

“A uncle to Steve Jr’s and….uhm…what’s her name again”

“……”

“………..”

“……………”

“………you don’t know her name?”

“no, not really”. Well, that’s awkward.

“Oh my god, Steve”, Bucky is regretting his decision to help his friend “how about we start with you introducing yourself?”

“Bucky, please don’t do anything stupid”, Steve pleads. He doesn’t want Bucky to give him to much pressure. The thought of Bucky trapping them in a closet scares him, or him basically throwing him against her.

Bucky just looks at him confused. “You will do something stupid. I’m here to prevent that from happening”.

“Promise?”

“Promise” Bucky says showing Steve his hands “I swear on Sam’s life”.

Steve smile slowly falls and Bucky corrects himself “ok, I swear on uhm, your life”.

“I guess that’s ok”

Since then Bucky’s been on the mission ‘get a sister-in-law’, with no luck though. He thought being a wingman would be easier, but it’s not. Definitely not. Or he has just a bad person that he needs to help.

So far Steve had like four times eye contact, spoke two sentences in two conversations. The one sentence only being two words.

The best try so far was when Steve was in the kitchen, reading the newspaper, when she came and asked him if he could move a bit so she can get to the fridge, and Steve said ‘yes’. He said something, made eye contact, didn’t walk away and didn’t stutter. He didn’t even sweat! Steve did this on his own without him and for that he needs an applause.

And the worst try was when he was ‘forced’ to train with her.

“You can do this Steve”, Bucky whispers to Steve before giving him a pat on the shoulder and pushing him towards the mat.

Steve still hasn’t introduced himself yet, so Bucky thought it would be a good opportunity to see the skills of the new recruits and to train with them. Surprisingly, Steve is now sparring against his crush, the woman they still don’t know the name of.

Steve walks on the mat, giving a quick look over his shoulder to see Bucky giving him a thumbs up.

He takes a deep breath before saying, “Ok, come at me”.

To say he’s impressed is an understatement. He’s fascinated by her skills, by the way she moves with such grace. Instead of directly coming at him and trying to punch him, she moves around him. She does that the whole time, dodging every single move of him while he tries to land a hit on her, well, more like pinch her. He wouldn’t hurt her. Ever.

At some point Steve finally manages to get a hold of her, but she is quicker and kicks his one leg away and then uses his arms to lift her up and wrap her legs around his neck, bringing him down. Steve is now on the mat with her legs around his neck, her directly hovering over his face. Steve doesn’t know why, but he’s not complaining about this position.

He gets himself back together and uses his legs to his lower back of the mat and makes a roll, so now she’s on the mat, with him in between her legs.

Steve can be lucky that most of the recruits are already doing their own thing because this is not a professional normal work position. Sam, who just walked in, stopped next to Bucky when he sees the scene. He looks at Bucky and sees how he’s directly looking at where Steve’s face is.

“Stop doing your creepy eye thing”, Sam tells him, but Bucky simply ignores him. Sam is about to say something when he hears a loud slam, and sees her on top of Steve, straddling his hips “oh”.

This scene doesn’t last long though because Steve flips them around, now straddling her hips and pinning her arms above her head. She tries to move around under him, successfully. Her back towards and is about to use her knees to make him fall off. Steve thinks quicker though and flips them again. Her back against his chest and his back against the floor. He wraps his legs around each of her legs, making her unable to move them, while he wraps his arms around her neck, taking her in a headlock. She tries to wiggle away, but can’t.

She taps his arm, signaling him that he won. Steve lets her go, softly lifting her arm to help her up, and then getting up after her.

“Everything ok?” he asks, wanting to make sure that he didn’t hurt her in some kind. That would definitely make admitting his feelings harder.

“Yes”, she smiles at him, panting slightly, “thank you, Captain Rogers, for training with me”. The smile she gives him is a true, generous smile. Steve doesn’t see how Sam and Bucky are exchanging scared looks.

“Y-You don’t need to tank me”, Steve says. Now it’s the time to introduce himself; he can do it. He takes a deep breath before continuing. “And you can call me S-“

He gets pulled away by Bucky, forcefully getting pushed against his chest. Steve looks Bucky confused into his eyes as Bucky pulls him with him behind the corner, out of sight of her, with Sam walking next to them. All the way to behind the corner Bucky keeps Steve against him, while Sam blogs other from seeing Steve’s side.

“What are you doing? I was just about to introduce myself”

Sam looks at him with wide eyes. “Yeah, something else was also about to introduce himself” and points to Steve’s crotch.

Steve looks down and sees what Sam is talking about.

For the first time, the golden boy is having a boner. A huge one. The serum really did make everything bigger.

“Oh, no no no no” Steve goes.

“Hey, it’s ok” Bucky tries calming him down “it’s uhm normal”

“Yeah, you know how many boners I had in my life”, Sam continues.

“See, even Sam thinks so. Did you ever notice how often I had when we were out with some girls, or just when I was thinking about one”, Bucky continues, Sam nodding his head the whole time. Both giving Steve a smirk. “You have them everywhere. In the shower, during work, in bed, I even had them when we had a sleepover”.

“Oh my god” Steve hates talking about that. He doesn’t know what’s worst, talking about women things or about men and their boners. “I had it in front of her, in front of everyone” he cries out.

Sam pats his shoulder. “No one saw it”

“You did!”.

“Because we watched both of you”, Sam assures him. “The others did their own thing, and she looked in your eyes, man. Not what’s below Captain America’s waist”

“Maybe she felt it though”, Bucky says.

“Bucky!”

“Your not helping, man”, Sam shrugs and looks down “ok, maybe she did because you know, it’s not small”

“See, Wilson! You agree”

Steve had never been this embarrassed in his entire life. He covers his erection with his hands, but it only makes it more obvious. He’s trying to cover his boner while his two best friends are talking about his penis size and how often they get a boner. He wants to dig himself a grave.

“Guys!” Steve whisper screams, getting their attention back. “I need to get rid of it”.

“Of your giant boner?”

“Yeas, Sam. What else is there to get rid of?” Steve says. Bucky slaps Sam on the back of his head, with no context at all. “What was that for, Bucky?”

He shrugs “I know you would like to do that, but are too nice to actually do it”. Steve just wanted to have a nice day where he maybe finally managed to speak to the woman of his dreams, but no, everything had to go like shit. “What do I do?”.

Sam and Bucky look at each other before letting out an obvious loud breath of air. They turn to Steve. “Well, you could try to calm down” Sam says, and Bucky continues “or you could, you know, help yourself out”.

“No!” Steve doesn’t even want to imagine helping himself out. The simple thought disgusts him and he feels an incredible feeling of shame.

Steve shakes his head at them. “Tell me something, that helps uhm, the problem”.

“Remember when your mom caught us looking through her drawers and spanked you”.

“….”

“….”

“….”

“Are you getting harder?” Sam asks, looking at his now slightly bigger boner.

“N-no” Steve pushes with all might on his boner to get it down “s-say something else”. He begs his friends for help.

Bucky looks hopeless “I don’t know what to say to get her off of your mind”. Steve wants to say something when Sam holds up his hands.

“Hold up, her off of your mind” he says looking at Steve, “so it wasn’t just because you got a bit close to her”. The smirk on his face is huge, a teasing one.

Steve groans out of frustration and pain.

“You know, I could see you together”, Sam goes, giving him a thump up.

“I know, but he’s too afraid to ask her. He couldn’t even introduce himself”.

“You didn’t introduce yourself to y/n?”

Steve looks at him and repeats her name softly. Y/n. Your name sound like an angel, a page out of the Bible that you worship and say as a pray. He would do that. Say your name like it’s a holy prayer. He wants to say your name again again and again. Whispering your name in your ear as you slowly share a kiss.

“Shit” Bucky says. He thought that Steve’s boner couldn’t get any bigger, but he was wrong. So wrong. It’s now almost twice as big as before. “Sam, why did you say that?!”

“I didn’t know this was going to happen! I just said her name. I didn’t think he would get hard because of a name”.

“Well, he did!”

They hear people coming into the training room. A lot by the sound of their talking. At least fifteen entered the room. Now you add them three, plus y/n and plus the seven recruits that were already in here. That makes twenty-six people. Two, Sam and Bucky, already saw Steve’s boner.

“Guys!” Steve screams “what do I do?!”, hiding more in the corner.

“Obviously getting her out of your head doesn’t work”.

“How about you stay in front of me while I walk out”.

Both shake their head “they would see you though and stare at you. Also, there are too many. You wouldn’t make it out unnoticed”.

“What if I wait until they leave”.

“Steve, they will eventually walk to this corner when they get more weights, and then see you”

Steve looks hopeless. “Bring me some pants that- I don’t know, doesn’t show my you know”.

“Steve…nothing can hide that boner”, Sam says “there is only one option”.

“What?”

“you could…help yourself out, Steve”

“No”

“Steve, please”

“No”

“Pal, listen-“

“No, Bucky. I can’t do that. I can’t just touch my…member…and..bring myself pleasure”, Steve hates talking about it. “How am I even suppose to do it?!”

“You take your dick in your hand and hold it tight, then you start to move your hand up and down. Personally, I would advise you to do it fast but-“

“I meant where!” he covers his ears trying to forget what Bucky just said. Though he learned something new. “I can’t just do it here, it would..spill”

Sam looks around until he sees something that could help “take this to collect your sperms”. He shows Steve an empty probably by someone forgotten water bottle.

“But-“ Steve knows that this is the only way and that he should accept it, but he doesn’t want to “fine”.

“I wait around the corner so no one walks over here, while Bucky makes sure you don’t get a heart attack” Sam says, winking before walking around the corner. Bucky gives Steve a slight smile before turning around. He doesn’t need to see his best friend Masturbate.

Surprisingly, Steve isn’t that loud. Sam only heard him once or twice a bit louder. One time he was screaming Bucky’s name because he turned around for a second.

Sam walks over to them when Bucky gives him a thump up. Steve is sitting on the floor, panting heavenly. Next to him, a completely full to the top water bottle. Or more like cum bottle.

“Congratulations on your first orgasm, Steve”

They are on their way out now, happy that Steve doesn’t have a big gun in his pants anymore.

“Hey, Sam”

Fuck

“Hey, Y/n” Sam smiles, while Steve panics. He’s drenched in sweat and is holding a bottle of his own cum.

You smile at Bucky and Steve too. You look at Steve and see how he looks like he’s in pain and completely drenched. “Are you ok, Captain Rogers?”.

Bucky and Sam quickly cover him up. “Oh yeah, he’s fine, he just-“

“Is hungry!”

“Uhm yeah and you know how you can get sick when you didn’t eat”

“Yeah ya get really sick”

You stare at them for a second, trying to process what they said. “Oh, maybe you should drink your shake then, Captain Rogers”, and point to his ‘shake’, and give him a smile.

“I-“

Bucky stops Steve. “Yeah no, he will just get something from the kitchen, you know?”.

“Bucky’s right, uhm I don’t think that would be such a smart idea to drink the shake. Hah ha” Steve says awkwardly.

Your smile falls. “Oh, yeah sure. I just thought that would help. We don’t want you passing out”.

Was his answer mean, is what Steve thinks. He doesn’t want you to think he just didn’t drink the ‘shake’ because you said that. Steves heart pains as he sees your reaction; you looked so sad. It obviously isn’t that big of a deal. Surely you forget about it later, but what if you don’t? You don’t forget that he didn’t want to drink the ‘shake’. What if you think you’re dumb for asking that? He thinks for a second, a long second, a second that will change everything.

“You’re right”, and opens the cap.

#chris evans #steve x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers #steve rogers imagines #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers smut #steve rogers angst #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers x reader fluff #steve rogers x y/n #captain america x y/n #captain america x reader #captain america x you #captain america #steven grant rogers

[howaboutcastiel]

Lunar Therapy: Strict Parent Recovery

Again, I don’t know what else to call this one. Perfectionism? Imposter syndrome? Crippling anxiety and fear of failure and abandonment that you carry your entire life? I believe that…

Steven Grant

Does not remember what that’s like. He has good self esteem and is able to be proud of all of his accomplishments and forgive himself when he messes up or falls short. That being said,

He’s got a lot of experience helping Marc with all of that, because he definitely does remember what that’s like. Steven has learned to praise the accomplishments of the people he loves and to never invalidate feelings of inadequacy. He has learned to notice the body language of someone who’s over-extending themself. Most importantly, he’s learned how how to notice the guilt and fear that eats at you.

Sometimes he’s overly sweet and he doesn’t understand why that makes you feel worse. He says things like “You’re allowed to not be perfect, you know. You don’t have to do things just because other people expect you to do them.”

He has to take a more dominant approach. Instead of saying “it’s okay that the dishes aren’t done.” He learns to say “Darling, you need to take a rest before you try to do any more work.”

Steven is better at helping with the bigger stresses. “It’s alright that you didn’t get that big promotion at work. It’s alright that you had to pause your plans to go to college. You’re doing so many good things. I love you just the way you are and I love everything that you’ve accomplished.”

Marc Spector

Knows what it’s like. He knows the panic of hearing the car door outside and cowering in shame because you know the chores aren’t done to their expectations. He knows the careful art of hiding failed quizzes or dodging questions about math class or hiding your baseball glove under your pillow because you know that homework always comes first.

And he knows that you know that it’s safe now. No one’s going to yell at you because there’s dirty laundry in the basket. No one’s going to make you skip dinner because you didn’t turn in your term paper on time. No one’s going to grab their belt from the closet because you should know better than this.

Steven has taught him what helps and what doesn’t. Toxic positivity can be just as bad as silence, so he resists the urge to tell you that you’re the most perfect person he’s ever seen. He’s so proud of you, so in awe of you and your strength and resilience and vigor, but he doesn’t say that outright.

He’s a man of few words, but he makes all of them count. “It’s okay, they’re just clothes.” “Don’t beat yourself up, you’ve been working hard.” And sometimes, he knows the most effective thing to say is “Don’t sweat it, baby. Everyone is lazy sometimes. You’re allowed to be lazy. You’re human.”

Marc uses gestures to calm you, too. He’ll hug you from behind while you’re cooking dinner. He’ll shut off your desk lamp if you stay up too late perfecting that last homework project. He’ll call in sick at your work, letting you watch from across the room as he dials the number, if he believes that you’re not allowing yourself the mental or physical break you deserve.

Jake Lockley

Remembers what it’s like. He remembers the crack of the belt and the slamming of doors and the hungry nights locked in his childhood bedroom. He never quite learned to feel guilty for whatever he was being punished for. Most of the time, he wasn’t around for that part anyway. Jake never spent time placing blame on himself.

That being said, he would never, ever, ever let someone else feel that blame. He would argue with you until his face turned blue if you ever expressed to him that you felt like you weren’t enough. That you felt like you needed to be more perfect.

Jake doesn’t take the time to praise your accomplishments, not during the time that you’re having these feelings. He chooses to focus on the fact that you must unlearn the feelings. You must learn to forgive yourself for your perceived shortcomings.

When you come home from a bad day, or when he comes home to find a sink of dishes or an un-mopped floor, he’ll make you celebrate. He’ll make the two of you get your favorite meal and watch your favorite movie and do whatever else you normally do to have fun.

“You can’t beat yourself up. You have to say instead “hey, I really sucked today, and the world kept on spinning. I disappointed myself and the sun still rose and set like it always done. If that isn’t cause for celebration, then nothing in the world is.”

When you actually do hit milestones and check off boxes on your list of goals, he treats you like the deity he already thinks you are. Forget food and movies, he’ll call you out of work or school or wherever and take you on an adventure halfway around the world. Jake will buy you a new outfit, new jewelry, anything to make you feel good about yourself. On the trip, he’ll tell everyone about your accomplishment as the reason you’re “celebrating” by taking a vacation.

Soupy, weird and specific thoughts. Idk I didn’t want to really get into the feelings and situations that stem from strict parents, because experiences are so different and also I don’t want to trigger myself lol. I find myself being a lot harder on myself than my roommates concerning how I treat our coming areas and shared chores, and I’m a very much perfectionist when it comes to school even though there���s no reason for me to need to be.

#moon knight #steven grant #marc spector #jake lockley #moon knight x you #moon knight x reader #steven grant x reader #steven grant x you #jake lockley x reader #jake lockley x you #lunar therapy #lunar therapy masterlist

[ivystoryweaver]

With You part 6

<- prev next -> || Fic Masterlist || My Masterlist

Summary: Will you always have to wake up in the middle of the night just to get to know Jake? Marc and Steven notice your yearning to see Jake again.

Pairings: Marc Spector x reader, Steven Grant x reader, Jake Lockley x reader. Gender neutral reader. No use of Y/N. Reader is engaged to Marc and Steven.

Word Count: 3k

Warnings/notables: Fluff, complicated relationship stuff, cursing, angst, sex but the language is not overly explicit and nothing gender-specific. Let me know if I missed a warning. inaccurate DID, based on the show. Not beta'd we die like arthur harrow in the back of jake's car

Dividers by saradika

PREVIOUSLY, on "With You"...

Wondering what he would ever do without you, Marc pulled you close, gently swaying with you in the silence of your flat. He had always felt so hard to love - his childhood had made sure of that. But you loved him hard.

One of the delicious advantages of being with Marc was that he liked to bury his angst, longing and inadequacies inside your body. Perhaps fucking through his feelings wasn't the healthiest coping mechanism, but it was better than drinking, and cheaper than therapy.

That's not to say Marc didn't see a therapist - he did, pretty regularly. But being inside you felt so much better than unearthing the shit from his childhood.

That's where you found yourself now, face down on the mattress, Marc's strong chest pressed to your back. Your sweat-soaked bodies writhed in tormented bliss as he thrust in and out of you - hard and almost frustratingly slow.

His thick fingers pushed their way through yours, intertwining, pressing your hands high above your head as he twisted his body deeper into yours.

You were helpless beneath him. And you loved it.

Marc was able to control so few things about his existence. The use of your body was one thing you happily and trustingly put completely in his control.

You and Marc did make soup together for dinner, but no matzah balls were harmed in the making of the soup. It was hearty enough for Marc, but also vegan for Steven. You made a mental note ask Jake what kind of food he liked.

"I don't think Jake's a vegan," Marc spoke up, reading your mind. "I think he's the reason my sandwiches are gone half the fuckin' time."

Marc and his sandwiches. He had sworn up and down, on more than one occasion, that either you or Steven had eaten his damn roast beef sandwiches. You always denied it, preferring turkey to beef. And Steven always fired back with, "Y'know I don't eat that shite, mate."

"Oh my god, I think you just solved a mystery," you marveled. The Mystery of the Roast Beef Sandwich and its thief.

Yeah, Marc wondered what else Jake was prone to stealing. Clothes? Money? You?

Then again, Marc couldn't really say anything about money at the moment. He didn't have a job, unless he counted the occasional times he fronted during Steven's university library shift. You were the breadwinner, at least for the time being, lovingly supporting Steven in getting a degree to actually match up to his intellect.

But sharing you? Was it even sharing if it was the same body? And was it even his business if you wanted to be with Jake? He had no fucking clue. All he knew was that you were about to be his spouse. Steven's too, really. But you barely knew Jake. How could you marry someone you didn't know?

"I can hear you thinking," you teased, slathering some fresh-baked bread with butter. "Wanna talk about it? Cause I don't think I can go anymore rounds today - between you and Steven." Meaning Marc wouldn't be able to bury his worries inside you until your body got a damn break.

"Do you mean between me and Steven and Jake?" Marc pointedly asked.

You dropped the butter knife. "W-what?" You squawked. "I haven't slept with Jake."

"But...you want to." Easing beside you, Marc leaned back against the kitchen counter. "Do you?"

You reallly should have spouted off a quick 'no'. But you hesitated.

"Shit," he groaned. "I shoulda known."

"I didn't say anything!" You protested, a little too innocently.

"Exactly," Marc huffed. "You didn't deny it."

"You kind of put me on the spot," you defended, retrieving the knife and returning to your task, furiously coating a slice of bread with five times too much butter. "Besides, Jake drives me crazy. If he climbs in the damn window again, I think I might shove him right back out."

"Ah, hell, it's worse than I thought," Marc grumbled, folding his toned arms over his chest in a distinct, defiant pout.

"How is it worse?" You scoffed. "And...what is worse?"

"You... him... shit," he sighed. "He got to you."

"He didn't," you protested. "Nothing happened. N-not really..." your voice trailed off as Marc's eyes flashed with possessiveness.

"Not really? I thought you said he didn't touch you. What the hell..." He paused, glancing at his reflection in the microwave.

"Is that Steven?" You interrupted, barging in to what you usually respected as private conversation between the boys. "What is he saying?"

Fixing his eyes back on you, Marc smirked triumphantly. "He's saying you look 'a bit flustered,' which would make sense, since you wore those black satin pj's and set your alarm just to see 'that mysterious bloke'."

"Steven, you are such a traitor!" You whined. "You guys are ganging up on me! I just wanted to talk to him."

"Mm-hmm," Marc hummed, caging you in against the counter with one arm on either side of your body. "So that's all you did - talk? In black satin? In the middle of the night?"

Narrowing your eyes, you called his bluff. "You guys are really obsessed with those pj's. Maybe you would have preferred I only wore your t-shirt? Or, I could have slept the way I sleep with you half the time - in nothing."

"Sure, mm-hmm," Marc playfully nodded down at you, mockingly agreeing with every word out of your mouth.

"Besides," you added, giving his chest a playful shove, "who knows how many times Jake has come home and found me like that - then slept beside me anyway?"

Marc went dead silent.

"I'm gonna kill him," he decided, waiting just a beat before scooping you up and throwing you over his shoulder, spinning you around the kitchen playfully. "First him..." you squealed as he tickled your side, feeling a mixture of giddiness and dizziness as he manhandled you, "then you. And then him again."

"Marc, put me down, put me down!" you giggled delightedly, banging your fists on his back.

After a few more twirls, and howls of laughter from you, he conceded, steadying you back against the counter. The two of you were smiling, breathless... his strong arms caged you in again as he wet his lips with his tongue.

Ducking down, he pressed his body into yours, breathing hotly against your open mouth.

"Promise me something..." he murmured, sucking on your bottom lip and swiping his tongue inside your mouth. He pulled back just a little, teasing you.

"What?" you impatiently demanded, chasing after his lips.

Sliding one hand around the back of your neck, he crushed his lips to yours, giving you what you really wanted. Gripping your jaw, he slid his tongue over yours, licking hotly as you groaned in satisfaction. You could never get tired of kissing this man.

"Promise me," he finally whispered, kissing the corner of your mouth, nuzzling your cheek with his nose. "Promise you'll tell me if something does happen - with Jake, I mean."

Easing back, he stared down into your eyes - his own warm, brown gaze pleading. "I know you don't have to. It-it's not my business, really, but..."

Sighing reluctantly, he poured his heart out to you. He knew he was safe with you - safe to show you what he really felt inside. "It's not like Steven," he admitted. "I don't know Jake. I just...I don't want anything to happen to you."

Nodding quickly, you reached up to caress his face. "Marc, of course. You're going to be my husband - of course I would tell you that."

"Really?" His eyes sparkled with relief and love.

"Yes, really," you sweetly whispered. "And I know there's no part of you that could ever hurt me."

After all that fuss with Steven and Marc, and the damn black satin pajamas, you actually thought you might see Jake again soon - particularly since he had finally introduced himself to his alters.

You thought wrong.

Jake went back to being Jake, not interacting with you or Marc or Steven, and the three of you were none the wiser about how he spent his time.

You couldn't wreck your entire sleep schedule just to look for him every night. He clearly had no intention of interacting with you during waking hours. You tried very hard not to take it personally. After all, you barely knew one another. But Steven and Marc could tell you thought of him...worried after him.

"I think you should wait up for him one night, love," Steven suggested one evening as you sat cuddled on the couch, reading together. London was being London again. The heavens had opened, dumping cold, wet rain for hours, and creating the perfect, candlelit night in for you and Steven.

Glancing over at your fiancé, so adorable in his oversized jumper, your eyebrows knit together questioningly. "You mean, set my alarm? 'Ambush' him again?"

Reaching up to pull his reading glasses off his nose, Steven shrugged. "Don't think it's much of an ambush, really. Just lovely you wanting to talk, is all. No harm in that."

Smiling warmly, you reached for his hand. "I don't think he sees me quite the way you do, my love."

"Not very bright then, is he? Running 'round at all hours for the old bird, missing the chance to come home to a wonder like you."

"Steven," you gasped, grinning at him. "Talking like that is going to bring an end to our night of reading very quickly."

"Fine by me, darling," he chuckled, tossing his book aside without even bothering to mark the page - something Steven never did. "Because I'm not the dimwitted bloke ignoring what's right in front of me." Scooting closer, he pulled you into his arms. "His loss is my gain, I'd say. Have you all the more to m'self."

So it was decided.

You would wait up for Jake (or wake up -whichever) to see if he wanted to interact with you, and ask how he was doing. It was possible, and in your mind, likely, that he didn't want to be a part of your life. But you wanted to hear it from his own mouth, especially since he slept beside you - in your bed, in your home.

Despite your general apprehension, you decided to be your most normal self and sleep (or in this case, stay awake) in one of Marc's white undershirts - they were so soft and smelled so deliciously like him. Steven's fuzzy goldfish socks found their way to your freezing feet.

You took a long nap and drank a huge cup of coffee (made perfectly by Marc) before bed. You were determined to stay up and see how Jake typically began his nighttime routine. He always ninja'd around like some sort of Father Christmas - waiting til everyone was completely asleep before darting in and out of the flat.

It would be your luck that Jake probably wouldn't even front tonight, and your caffeinated body would stare at your sleeping fiancé for the next several hours.

At first, it was difficult to resist cuddling up with your sleepy Steven. He did manage to adorably whine that he needed you, but you quickly reminded him that this was his idea.

"Just miss you 's all," he murmured, drifting off to dreamland.

You got bored very quickly. Steven had recommended a podcast called, 'Welcome to Staying Awake.' Finding some headphones, you tried it out, following the directions it suggested - reading, solving a puzzle, and so forth.

You were just starting to doze in the comfy chair in the bedroom's corner when your fiancé stirred...only to roll over and fall back asleep.

"Ugh..." you huffed, pushing off your chair to head to the kitchen. After a quick splash of water to the face and a long drink of water, you stumbled back to your bedroom...

...where you saw Steven? pulling a pair of tailored black trousers up his legs - his cozy pj's nowhere in sight. Fastening his pants, he turned around - shirtless - nodding once to acknowledge you.

"Jake?" You tentatively greeted, breaking the late-night silence.

"Hola, mi amor," Jake's rich, deep voice greeted you smoothly - his chocolate eyes flickering down to your bare legs. "I'm sorry I woke you."

"Jake," you exhaled shakily, easing toward him slowly. "You didn't wake me up. I was waiting for you."

Warmth bloomed in his chest, but he simply reached for his white dress shirt, quickly easing his arms into the sleeves and fastening the buttons.

"Where...do you keep your clothes?" you cautiously asked, inching closer.

Nodding to the closet, he remained quiet, knotting his tie and sitting down on the edge of the bed to pull on his socks and shoes. Khonshu had awakened him. Time to get to work.

"Where are you going?" you questioned after a few quiet moments watching him getting dressed.

Finishing the lacing of his shoes, he stood, reaching for his leather jacket. Realizing your question was not rhetorical, he granted you a slight smirk. "You know where."

"Can I come with you?" You blurted, already flustered. How did he manage to do this to you?

Narrowing his eyes, he shook his head, tutting a bit condescendingly. "You're not serious."

"I am," you insisted, scurrying over to the drawer to find some joggers for your bare legs. Of course, in this state, compared to Jake, you would be way underdressed. He looked head-to-toe incredible.

The faster you moved, trying to get dressed in enough presentable clothing to go out into the frigid rain, the slower Jake moved. But each action was nonchalant, as if he barely noticed your effort.

Why was he so damn infuriating? Then again, those were the exact words he'd said about you...

Pulling a leather glove over his long fingers, one dark eyebrow shot up inquisitively.

"Almost ready," you huffed, feeling like a child asking to go to work with a parent.

Realizing you were serious, Jake yanked on the second glove, giving his knuckles a crack. "Mi corazón..." he warned, pulling his flat cap over the lustrous curls on his head, and wondering what had gotten into you. You couldn't possibly think he would let you anywhere near his night life.

You were dressed now, in a weird mixture of your clothes and Marc's, but your goldfish-clad feet still poked adorably out of your joggers. Glancing all around the room, your eyes frantically searched for the nearest pair of shoes.

Approaching you confidently, Jake reached for your elbow, bringing you to a standstill. "I have to go. You should sleep."

Yanking your arm out of his grasp, you huffed. "I told you I don't respond well to orders."

Rubbing his gloved hand over the stubble on his chin, he nodded, "Goodnight," and turned to walk out of the bedroom.

"No, I'm coming with you, Jake, wait--"

"No, mi corazón. No." He whirled around, his gaze burning into yours.

"Why not?" you shot back, your hands landing on your hips. "You're going to work, right? I need to talk to you. And I want to see what you do."

He scoffed. "No. You don't."

"Stop telling me no," you snapped, realizing this whole stay-up-and-talk-to-Jake thing was already an unprecedented disaster. You simply could not keep your cool around this man.

"Ah, I see - I can't tell you what to do, but you can give me orders." Stalking back over to the night table, he reached for Marc and Steven's phone.

"I-I'm not giving you orders...I just- why can't I come with you?" You were desperate. You realized, at that moment, that alll this was not a good look on you. What happened to cool, calm and collected you? What happened to the you who respected the hell out of Marc and Steven's autonomy and choices?

You went so far as not even trying to dictate to Marc whether or not he should drink. It was his choice, always - it had to come from him. So why couldn't you do the same with Jake? You knew the drill - people were going to do what they decided to do. Arguing the point was only arguing with reality itself.

Sure, you could explain your fears or needs, and Jake could take that information into account. But ultimately, every person in the world always chose what they were going to choose - period, the end.

"I'm not taking you out there. You know it's not safe," he explained with infuriating calmness. "I'm not exactly working a normal job here."

"You mean...you mean Moon Knight. Like...saving people. Like you did with me that night."

His eyes flashed - you couldn't decipher if it was anger or surprise. "Marc told you."

"Yes," you answered softly, taking a moment to breathe in deeply. You had to calm down and stop sounding so desperate. "I just don't understand why you can follow me - why you can watch over me and save me, but you won't just talk to me." Your lip trembled as you started to realize he just may not ever want to be in your life.

"I thought you said that I was your family," you whispered, moving close to peer up into his eyes. "But you haven't talked to me in a week. I've been worried...I've been thinking about you."

Wetting his lips, Jake swallowed hard and shifted from one foot to the other - the first inkling that you were having any effect on him whatsoever. His dark eyes flickered down to yours. "I told you I can take care of myself," he gruffly responded, his resolve beginning to crack. "So stop worrying about me."

"Stop telling me what to do," you fired back, refusing to shrink away. "You're driving me crazy. If you don't want to talk to me, or know me - if you want to sneak in and out of here every night and never see me again, then just say so."

Your chest heaved with emotion. "I won't like it and I won't ever stop worrying about you, or wanting to know you, but --"

You didn't get to finish because Jake roughly pulled you into his arms and crushed his mouth to yours.

@stormydaysxx laaundromat @kindlover @spxctorsslxt @deezisnotreal

@rivalriotrenegade @wordacadabra this--is--music @i-still-dont-like-your-face 

idk if all the tags work. I tried!

#moon knight #steven grant #marc spector #jake lockley #marc spector x reader #steven grant x reader #jake lockley x reader #mcu #marc spector x gn!reader #steven grant x gn!reader #jake lockley x gn!reader #marc spector x you #steven grant x you #jake lockley x you #moon knight fic #moon knight fanfic #moon knight fanfiction #with you fic #oscar isaac fic #moon boys #moon knight system

[espresso-arts-and-writes]

ah yes, the close up of the eldritch horror of Billven

you haunt me still :)

#steven universe #steven universe future #steven needs therapy #su x gf crossover #su gf crossover #bill cipher #billven #Queued post