#so just let me know

[yooniesim]

transmasc cc masterlist

hi! after getting a few asks about it, I wanted to make a quick list of cc I use for my transmasc sims. I hope it’s useful! 💜

binders

edited ea binder by @ice-creamforbreakfast

accessory binders by @ratboysims

functional binder by @pigeonhome

functional binder recolor by @maxiematch

functional binder recolor by @standardheld

binders by @schmapple

accessory binders by @valhallansim

chest binder accessory by @sparrowcc

clothing

basic tee by @pigeonhome

vintage button up by @pigeonhome

suit by @pigeonhome

jerseys by @pigeonhome

crop top by @pigeonhome

hoodie/sweater/jumper by @pigeonhome

boxers by @pigeonhome

boxers accessory by @pigeonhome

boxers accessory (strap on version) by @glammoosecc

essentials collection (2 versions) by @nucrests

scars

top surgery scars by @ratboysims

top surgery scars by @mnlvlz-sims

top surgery scars by moody bagels

male trans scars by @cloudy-simmer

top surgery scars by @nihilisims

top surgery scars part 2 by @simreaper

top surgery scars by faaeish

top surgery adornments (tattoos) by faaeish

facial & body hair

all natural body hair by me

leg hair for fem frame by @mando-cc

fem frame body hair by @afternoonzephyr

facial hair for femme frame by @deelitefulsimmer

beards as skin details by @isaax-sims

facial hair by @goopsims

upper lip hair by @marigolde

bodies & skin details

necessity skinblend by me

body mesh by dumbaby (❗nsfw❗)

body details by wildguy (enabled for men by me) (❗nsfw❗)

body mesh & gender unlock by @simdulgencemods (❗nsfw❗)

presets & sliders

flat chest presets by @saruin

androgynous presets by @saruin

the tits sliders by @ssspringroll

neck slider by @luumia

mods

lgbtqia mod by lumpinou

cas breast & pregnancy option by maars

#ts4 #the sims 4 #ceci's stuff #sims 4 #masterlist #cc masterlist #sims cc masterlist #wcif #trans cc #ts4 lookbook #anything anyone has in addition is welcome #also if anyone has any cc ideas/requests for their trans boys im always happy to try #so just let me know #would like to get simdulgences meshes working a bit better with fem frame guys #so i might try that at some point

[irlpretear]

100 trans/genderqueer musicians

Bands

Against Me! (rock, folk punk) (x)

The Oozes (punk) (x)

The Hirs Collective (metal, grindcore) (x)

GEL (hardcore punk) (x)

Urn (hardcore punk) (x)

The Black Dresses (noise pop, hardcore hyperpop) (x)

Party Ghost (rock) (x)

Lagrimas (hardcore punk, scream punk) (x)

Doll Skin (rock) (x)

Dazey and the Scouts (rock, indie) (x)

G.L.O.S.S. (hardcore punk) (x)

Dog Park Dissidents (punk rock) (x)

She/Her/hers (rock) (x)

Deli Girls (hardcore electronic) (x)

Dream Nails (punk rock) (x)

Sarah and the Safe Word (rock, dark cabaret) (x)

Pinkie Promise (punk rock) (x)

B. Fraser (emo) (x)

Newgrounds Death Rugby (emo) (x)

Scowl (hardcore punk) (x)

Feminazgul (black metal) (x)

Sports Bra (dream pop, light rock) (x)

Club Sofa (indie pop) (x)

The Cost ov Living (grindcore, harsh noise) (x)

Kuromy (punk) (x)

The Sonder Bombs (indie, pop) (x)

Lidocaine (rock) (x)

I'm letting unseen forces take the wheel (cybergrind) (x)

Gum Disease (punk) (x)

Cam Girl (rock, trash rock) (x)

Gully Boys (grunge pop) (x)

Arcadia Grey (sparkle punk) (x)

Schmekel (folk punk) (x)

Destructo Disk (punk rock) (x)

User Unauthorized (hardcore punk) (x)

The Spook School (indie pop) (x)

Pinkshift (emo) (x)

Glass Beach (emo) (x)

Butch Baby (light rock) (x)

VIAL (indie punk) (x)

Sister Wife Sex Strike (folk punk) (x)

homewrecker. (metal, hardcore punk) (x)

Mega Mango (indie rock) (x)

Keep For Cheap (prarie rock) (x)

Steam Powered Giraffe (cabaret, steampunk) (x)

Thotcrime (grindcore, cybergrind) (x)

Whirlybird (indie pop) (x)

Kampsport (hardcore punk) (x)

Um Jennifer? (alt-rock, punk) (x)

Scarlet Demore (alt-rock) (x)

HappyHappy (folk, folk-punk) (x)

Queen Zee (punk) (x)

Grumpy Plum (slop pop) (x)

Cheap Perfume (punk) (x)

Pollyanna (power-pop, rock) (x)

Ballista (metalcore) (x)

Faetooth (fairy doom, metal) (x)

Lacerated (death metal) (x)

Fortuna Malvada (hardcore punk) (x)

Peach Rings (bedroom power-pop) (x)

Solo Artists

Laura Jane Grace (rock, folk punk) (x)

Left at London (pop) (x)

ZAND (pop, ugly pop) (x)

Ada Rook (hardcore electronic) (x)

Ms. White (pop) (x)

Rett Madison (indie, folk) (x)

Murder Person for Hire (folk) (x)

Backxwash (rap, industrial hip hop) (x)

LustSickPuppy (electronic, rap) (x)

Babylungs (electronic, rap) (x)

Human Kitten (folk punk) (x)

Harley Poe (folk punk) (x)

Ewy (emo, folk punk) (x)

Averstaskta (instrumental) (x)

Andie Schoen (indie) (x)

Elliot Lee (dark pop, electronic rock) (x)

Urias (hip hop, ballroom) (x)

Twink Obliterator* (cybergrind) (x)

Rio Romeo (cabaret punk, indie) (x)

Knife Girl (art pop, indie) (x)

Alexander James Adams (folk) (x)

Starmaxx (pop) (x)

Sofya Wang (pop, alt-R&B) (x)

Boy Jr (indie/alt pop) (x)

Medusa (revenge pop, hip-hop) (x)

Mal Blum (singer-songwriter, folk) (x)

Gina Young (riot grrrl) (x)

Petra Fiyd (indie pop) (x)

awfultune (bedroom pop) (x)

Quinn Hills (alternative pop) (x)

Femtanyl (electronic) (x)

Vivivivivi (electronic, glitchcore) (x)

Lilac Boy (glitchcore) (x)

Rosie Tucker (indie rock) (x)

Ryan Cassata (singer-songwriter) (x)

Pain Chain (noise, synth) (x)

In Love With A Ghost (electronic, lo-fi) (x)

Alice Longyu Gao (hyperpop) (x)

Prophetic Nightmares (ambient synthwave) (x)

Saint Wellesley (indie folk) (x)

#music #trans art #punk #queer art #some of these are incredibly obvious and some are very not so #also i say trans/genderqueer bc some of these artists are not explicitly out but still fall under the umbrella of queer #if i made a mistake and one of these artists is actually cis let me know too #im not adding to this list nor is it just a top 100 btw. just a selection #if you ask where is (popular artist) im gonna block you

[theshadowrealmitself]

I like to think that Vulcans who come to understand that Humans just can’t try to process emotions the same way as them, it’s just healthiest to let it out in harmless ways, decide that venting and stuff should be taken just as seriously as Vulcan’s meditation time, and will encourage the Humans around them to complain about what’s upsetting them

People who are used to aloof Vulcans who avoid Humans at all cost running into one comforting a Human

“-and then they said my cheesecake was subpar, and they didn’t even bring a dish!!!”

“The purpose of this event was that every participant brings a food item of sorts, correct?”

“Yeah!!”

“And they did not follow this rule while insulting dishes that were brought?”

“Mostly just my dish but yeah >:(“

“How illogical”

“That’s what I’m saying!!!”

#star trek #Vulcans #Humans #not based on a specific thing #but I used to know this annoying couple that were ‘family friends’ #who would show up to potluck dinners and the like and would either bring nothing or bring something really just. out of left field? #like a bag of frozen chicken to a bbq #and then proceed to make sure they are first even if it was stated to let kids go first #would take HUGE amounts before anyone else got a chance to get a plate #and then make off with the leftovers again even if they were already claimed for #and it wasn’t a food insecurity thing trust me I would never speak bad about a person getting food if that was even a remote chance #the adults who raised us knew them really well and we’d been to their house a ton of times #they were just dicks #and yeah. they’d occasionally insult the food. while eating the MAJORITY of it. #it was so weird at their home they would go out of their way to get the healthiest options possible #you know the really bland tasteless expensive stuff that apparently was healthier #but then if they were visiting our house they would. eat all our unhealthy snacks. #that always pissed me off so much as a kid because we actually had a food insecurity thing going on #and also a variety of other reasons that are a bit too depressing to bring up on this post #but anyways we’d hardly ever get to have nice snacks #and this couple would just take them all??? even after we’d tell them repeatedly that it was ours and those snacks weren’t gonna be #replaced #hated that couple #if you’re wondering why they were ‘family friends’ it’s because the couple who raised us #(it feels weird to type it out like that but apparently legal guardians doesn’t fit since they never finished petitioning 💀) #liked having them around because it made them look like ‘such great Christian’s’ being nice to the people #that no one else wanted to be friends with #I always thought that was a really weird and fucked up reason to be friends with someone #this got long sorry 😭

[strongermonster]

why is this written like it's trying to hypnotize me into making a batch of caramelized onions, and more importantly, why is it working

#DON'T YOU WANT THAT FOR YOURSELF? DON'T YOU WANT THAT FOR YOURSELF? DON'T YOU WANT THAT FOR YOURSELF? DON'T YOU WANT THAT FOR YOURSELF? DO— #i just wanted to know if they froze ok so i can make huge batches for mujadara #it takes SO LONG let me just make Tons at once #jj stuff

[stromblessed]

Mizu, femininity, and fallen sparrows

In my last post about Mizu and Akemi, I feel like I came across as overly critical of Mizu given that Mizu is a woman who - in her own words - has to live as a man in order to go down the path of revenge.

If she is ever discovered to be female by the wrong person, she will not only be unable to complete her quest, but there's a good chance that she'll be arrested or killed.

So it makes complete sense for Mizu to distance herself as much as possible from any behavior that she feels like would make someone question her sex.

I felt so indignant toward Mizu on my first couple watchthroughs for this moment. Why couldn't Mizu bribe the woman and her child's way into the city too? If Mizu is presenting as a man, couldn't she claim to be the woman's escort?

However, this moment makes things pretty clear. Mizu knows all too well the plight of women in her society. She knows it so well that she cannot risk ever finding herself back in their position again. She helps in what little way she can - without drawing attention to herself.

Mizu is not a hero and she is not one to make of herself a martyr - she will not set herself on fire to keep others warm. There's room to argue that Mizu shouldn't prioritize her quest over people's lives, but given the collateral damage Mizu can live with in almost every episode of season 1, Mizu is simply not operating under that kind of morality at this point. ("You don't know what I've done to reach you," Mizu tells Fowler.)

And while I still feel like Mizu has an obvious and established blind spot when it comes to Akemi because of their differences in station, such that Mizu's judgment of Akemi and actions in episode 5 are the result of prejudice rather than the result of Mizu's caution, I also want to establish that Mizu is just as caged as Akemi is, despite her technically having more freedom while living as a man.

Mizu can hide her mixed race identity some of the time, and she can hide her sex almost all of the time, but being able to operate outside of her society's strict rules for women does not mean she cannot see their plight.

It does not mean she doesn't hurt for them.

Back to Mizu and collateral damage, remember that sparrow?

While Mizu is breaking into Boss Hamata's manse, she gets startled by a bird and kills it on reflex. She then cradles it in her hands - much more tenderly than we've seen Mizu treat almost anything up to this point in the season:

She then puts it in its nest, with its unhatched eggs. Almost like she's trying to make the death look natural. Or like an accident.

You see where I'm going with this.

When Mizu kills Kinuyo, Mizu lingers in the moment, holding the body tenderly:

And btw a lot of stuff about this show hit me hard, but this remains the biggest gut punch of them all for me, Mizu holding that poor girl's body close, GOD

When Mizu arranges the "scene of the crime," Kinuyo's body is delicate, birdlike. And Mizu is so shaken afterward that she gets sloppy. She's horrified at this kill to the point that she can't bring herself to take another innocent life - the boy who rats her out.

MIZU'S ONE MOMENT OF SOFTNESS AND MERCY, COMING ON THE HEELS OF HER NEEDING TO KILL A GIRL TO SPARE HER THE WORST FATE THAT THIS RIGID SOCIETY HAS TO OFFER WOMEN, AND TO SPARE A BROTHEL FULL OF INNOCENT WOMEN WHO ARE THE CASTOFFS OF SOCIETY, NEARLY RESULTS IN ALL OF THEIR DEATHS

No wonder Mizu is as stoic and cold as she is.

And no wonder Mizu has no patience for Akemi whatsoever right before the terrible reveal and the fight breaks out:

Speaking of Akemi - guess who else is compared to a bird!

The plumage is more colorful, a bit flashier. But a bird is a bird.

And, uh

Yeah.

I like to think that Mizu killing the sparrow is not only foreshadowing for what she must do to Kinuyo, but is also a representation of the choice she makes on Akemi's behalf. She decides to cage the bird because she believes the bird is "better off." Better off caged than... dead.

But because Mizu doesn't know Akemi or her situation, she of course doesn't realize that the bird is fated to die if it is caged and sent back home.

Mizu is clearly not happy, or pleased, or satisfied by allowing Akemi to be dragged back to her father:

But softness and mercy haven't gotten Mizu anywhere good, recently.

There is so much tragedy layered into Mizu's character, and it includes the things she has to witness and the choices she makes - or believes she has to make - involving women, when she herself can skirt around a lot of what her society throws at women. Although, I do believe that it comes at the cost of a part of Mizu's soul.

After all, I'm gonna be haunted for the rest of this show by Mizu's very first prayer in episode 1:

"LET" her die. Because as Ringo points out, she doesn't "know how" to die.

Kind of like another bird in this show:

#blue eye samurai #mizu #akemi #kinuyo #bes #women are birds okay they are BIRDS #the let me die line is so SCARY AND SAD like a part of Mizu wants death but she cant? she doesnt know how?? excuse you show??? #when all these other delicate birds are dying all around her #akemis character gets more and more gutwrenching upon subsequent rewatches because whenever she says her life is in danger #NO ONE BELIEVES HER - certainly not other women #because shes rich and pampered and that means shes safe and is worrying about nothing right? right????? #and it turns out that all of akemis instincts were right and she was in danger the ENTIRE TIME #also I need to make a post just for kinuyo because I am sad

[soldrawss]

Watching and Dreaming doodles cause im 🥺🥰

#my art #toh #the owl house #toh hunter #toh willow #toh gus #toh darius #toh huntlow #huntlow #toh winter #the owl house spoilers #toh spoilers #toh season 3 #before you comment that gus already has a tattoo #i know #but i like my hc anyway let me live #and darius is very much hunters dad now i take no criticism or comments #and obviously im speechless at the huntlow i just love them so much

[anna-scribbles]

last one i promise(<—lie)

#let’s as a society think more about why adrien wanted to go to school #and what. perhaps. he thought school was #i think the way chloe describes it she really is just a beautiful rich girl with too much time on her hands #and no one at school is treating her accordingly. #abby got so mad at me today because she thinks it’s too cringe that i keep taking about adrien liking ohshc #which is like. how are you gonna know me my whole life and then be disappointed when i’m cringe. #i’ve never hidden who i am. it’s cringe all the way down #anyway #ml #my art #miraculous ladybug #adrien agreste #chloe bourgeois #ohshc #wait i am gonna tag this thirteen actually. just go with me #thirteen

[vocarandom]

Btw if y'all ever catch me reblogging stolen art or AI art please please please let me know so I can delete it! I'm not very good at catching those things ^^;

#psa #i mean it #i won't be rude or anything and i don't wanna spread that shit #so just let me know

[dkettchen]

cursed construction core hi vis bra that came to me in a dream

In the dream I saw it in the window display of a hardware/DIY/trade shop, implying it was meant to be a practical garment designed for actual female constructions workers in a Female Armour level missed-the-brief attempt at gender inclusion

The practical support from the visible underwire combined with the hi vis implying it’s not meant to be worn as an undergarment, I just-

I blame my binge-reading ND Stevenson’s gender comics talking abt masculinity and femininity incl the one abt Victoria’s Secret lingerie yesterday for this monstrosity x’D

#construction core #I am legitimately tempted to make this irl #just like as a commentary art piece on failed attempts at inclusion that completely missed the point #but alas I lack the booba these days to make it for myself so I'll need someone else to fit it to to enable my shenanigans #maybe someday #in the dream I met finnster in the next shop and was like dude you should go buy it for the meme lolll you could wear it on a stream #so uuuhhh- finn if you're reading this (I know you've seen my tumblr before we have video evidence) and you want this I'll make it for you #for manly man construction times #just let me know x'D #to the transmascs reading this: read the linked comics they're highly relatable #you can lose a whole morning to them #like me #have fun

[nenayaquisieras]

Simon has always been confused on why you gift him toys. Sure, most of the gifts you gave him were some of the things he liked. Bourbon, masks, gloves, make up for him to smudge his eyes with, some daggers and knives. Things that we're useful for him, just him. But later, you gifted him a toy airplane. He makes a comment about it, saying he is not a child anymore and you were better off giving it to Johnny instead.

"No, this is specifically for you, take it."

When he gets to him room, he walks toward his trash can, opening it with the tip of his boot. He gives one more look at the toy, his mood souring before throwing it into the trash. He goes on about his day, training, signing paper work, drills. Doing anything to ignore the pain stinging memories that the toy brought back. Emotions that were buried thousands of feet deep it could reach hell itself. Later, he lies awake in bed, staring at the ceiling, avoiding looking at the cylinder shape that's calling for him in his peripheral.

Fuck.

He pulls the covers off vigorously and stomps over to the trash can. He is standing over it like he's trying to intimidate it, as if it was an enemy he's trying to get rid of in battle. To anyone else, the scene would look comical.

He sighs to himself and reaches down to take out the toy he so cruelly threw away. He sets it on his desk and quickly walks toward his bed, facing away from his desk.

The next day, he wakes up feeling different. He swears he sees his room more vibrant, more lively. That energy follows him through out the day, having his other teammates notice his rather bright mood.

You catch him in the hallway. Pulling him aside to ask him about the paper work you left at his desk this morning. Of course, he notices the way you smile brightly, more so than usual. But he notices that you're not looking at him. More like looking at something next to him.

"What's got you so cheery?"

You turn to look up at him, feeling a bit embarrassed.

"I just..." You take a quick glance at the spot next to him, before bringing your eyes back upon his.

"I just hope you liked your gift." The same bright smile appearing on your face.

He stares at you, examining your words. Your expression.

You think you see his eyes crinkle a bit.

"Yea,"

"I liked it."

#call of duty #cod #simon ghost riley #simon riley #ghost #simon riley x reader #medium!reader #Joseph really liked his toy airplane #Honestly this was her way of giving his nephew toys without her bring up that she sees dead people #she can't be like “Ghost let me gift Joseph something” #he would be like “How the fawk you know who that is??” #sorry for errors its so late #but yea ill have more soon #I just cant figure out how to traumatize Gaz and Soap #Only Ghost and Price #love to see the old men suffer #ghost simon riley #ghost x reader

[stuckinapril]

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

#It’s just so different #even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol #in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps #if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it #esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends #no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr #u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS #meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life #this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation #like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !! #& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers #who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them #and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends #it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me #I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc #like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this #so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works #p

[incomprehensiblelentils]

I chime in with a haven’t you people ever heard of locking the goddamn tomb

#locked tomb #tlt shitposting #the locked tomb #tlt #locked tomb series #if this post already exists I couldn’t find it so I swear I didn’t mean to steal it #(let me know if it is an existing post and I’ll happily delete this lol) #I was just like wait. WAIT.

[thatrandomblogsays]

RIP Annabeth, I just know Percy sacrificing himself for you, after knowing you for a week, after telling you that you’ve done more for him this week than his father ever has, is permanently altering the brain chemistry of your avoidant attachment self

#epitome of the quote: there is something really healing about being loved #which is from a book I CANT REMEMBER SO I CANT LOOK IT UP PROPERLY #let me know if you guys know what I’m talking about #i just know Percy’s actions had her on her knees #what is this? unconditional love? #is this why people make friends? #i am lovable? #this is amazing #oh shit my new friend is about to die #I’m so normal about them (I’m lying) #pjo #pjo spoilers #pjo tv show spoilers #pjo series #pjo tv show #percy jackson #annabeth chase #Percy and Annabeth #mine

[annoyinglibra]

#poll #nobody is going to see it bc my followers are so inactive here but I’m just curious 😔 #via the notes I’m learning that some schools had all three which is trippy to me #I should’ve included an option for all three 😔 #editing notes again: I know nobody will see the edit but I didn’t think to include ‘all three’ or ‘other’ because I was sick + tired let me #liveeee 😭

[lilowoof]

#I made this to let out the feels of loving my friends who love me back #if I haven't met some of yall I would have literally killed myself so I am forever grateful #and the fact that those feelings have returned....but I still have you guys....it's heartwarming to know that #I love yall #*I walk away to cry out my emotions* #I am not sure if I will make it to the end of the year tbh but I also want to in order to be around my pals and to play games with them #that's how important yall are to me #god #sorry for being so emotional on a thursday night. it just hit me really hard tonight hahha

[inkskinned]

there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)

i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.

i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.

and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.

HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.

now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.

my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.

i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.

by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!

keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"

similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."

the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"

if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.

the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.

godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.

the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.

#this is objectively bad advice #don't listen to it protect yourself and do real work on yourself find one of the good posts i've made about this #but also. u know. if u want to have fun while u do the work of setting boundaries #.... it IS fun #i will say that my fear of him went SO down after i just started. fucking with him. #bc i used to get SO fucking upset #i'd spend WEEKS arguing with him. tearing my hair out. sick with anxiety and dread and anger about all of it #and now i just LITERALLY do not engage #instead i'm like '' haha :) mole people" and get the HELL out of any tense conversation #i kind of think some of these people are literally addicted to drama as a form of connection #they like the rush they get from arguing #but those arguments are incredibly damaging for me #so like..... i am in the process of literally rehabilitating this person to figure out how to find connection thru #NORMAL CONVERSATION #he doesn't get it yet #i also do talk to them like they're preschool kids lmafo . ''are you using a safe and kind voice right now?'' #'' do you need a snackie? you sound a little upset. let's have some hummus and come back to playtime when we feel ready''