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iuteamstarcandy · 5 months

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[INTERVIEW] CeCi (November 2013)

-Return of the Queen- The queen on stage is back. Not as a girl, but as a musician, with music different from others, more mature thoughts and with the name IU who is in her 5th year since her debut.

There are only a few days left to your comeback with your third full-length album, Modern Times’. How do you feel? (The interview was held on 2 October 2013.)

IU: I was fine until yesterday, but I just came back from a meeting for KBS Sketchbook and it suddenly feels very real. I think it's because it's my favorite stage and I want to work harder on it.

Does your heart feel heavy or are you excited?

IU: My heart feels so heavy. I've been controlling my diet for a few days ahead of my comeback, but I kept eating because I was on a roll today. After going on a food tour of tteokbokki, stir-fried spicy pork and stir-fried kimchi, I met (Yoo) In-na unnie at a cafe and we had cake, mixed grains latte and sweet potato latte. I really eat a lot. Sigh, I still have a photoshoot tomorrow, so I'm carrying a lot of guilt on my back right now. Later, I'm going to go to the practice room to relieve my sweat and guilt. (Laughs) I think I'm going to get more nervous every minute from this moment.

I didn’t expect you to be the type to get nervous before your comeback.

IU: I don’t really get nervous usually. However, the choreography of the comeback song ‘The Red Shoes’ is strong and the difficulty level of acting with my expressions is high. There is also the pressure of having to do many things that I have never tried before. Also, until just a year ago, I’m not the kind to get fat easily, but recently, I suddenly started to gain weight, which does make me worry. Looking back, perhaps that period was a rare exception instead though. I was always chubby, but I lost a lot of weight during the two years of ‘Good Day’ and ‘YOU&I’. At that time, no matter how much I ate for supper or stuffed myself, I was losing weight and I was stressed out to hear people call me ‘pitiful’, ‘starved’, or ‘elementary school student’, but now that I'm gaining weight, I wonder what’s going on. (Laughs) I started working out early this year, and I think I'm returning to my normal condition because my body is healthy. I don't know if it's something to feel sad or happy about.

I was surprised to hear that you're on a diet. You have a slim figure. Is it because as an artist, you want to be in the best condition before your comeback?

IU: Thankfully, I still benefit from the image of ‘IU is skinny’. But I’ve put on about 5kg more. (Laughs) If you take away the happiness from eating, you lose happiness, you know. Honestly, if I didn’t gain weight on my face, I don't think I'll ever be on a diet. I'm the type to gain weight starting from my face, so it's hard.

The <Modern Times> teaser was a hot topic. I thought the words ‘sexy’, ‘chic’, and ‘intense’ were far from the previous image of IU.

IU: I kept laughing during the shoot too. (Interviewer: It was funny?) There was no time for me to feel awkward because I was trying something I had never done before. It felt like I was acting as a certain character. I guess I just laughed when I saw someone I didn’t recognise standing in the mirror looking back at me. I kept asking the staff, ‘Is this good? It’s good? kekeke’ and tried my best to do as I was told. Seeing the reactions of people afterwards, some people liked it and some people felt that it was unfamiliar and got flustered, saying it doesn't suit me. The gap between the reactions was actually quite interesting.

I realized from your changing image that IU's ‘coming-of-age ceremony’ has started. You've had a big transformation.

IU: This time, people in each department of the company tried out new things and experimented freely. If I wanted to give it the grand name of a ‘coming-of-age ceremony’, I would have put more effort into it. Every teaser released has a different mood to it. ‘If I throw in multiple things, one of them would make it, right? It doesn't matter if none of them do, since we're having fun and the music is good.’ That's what I thought, so there isn’t any deep significance to the teasers.

People tried to interpret the change. Like it was supposed to be some kind of secret code.

IU: That was a trick, too. I wanted to draw attention and end it with good music anyway. The performance actually isn't exactly unconventional. I'm just going to perform with as much fun as possible and while working as hard as I can.

When it comes to making a choice, you gain something and you lose something. There will be people who want to stick to the existing image of IU.

IU: I don’t enjoy transforming, but I wasn’t nervous about it either. When it was revealed, I thought everyone would be like, ‘What’s this~ hahaha’ I thought it would be fun for everyone. If someone started laughing first, I would have laughed along while saying, ‘Is it possible for me to be sexy~?" It’s a relief that I didn’t become a joke, but kind of a pity too. My fans all gather because they like IU, but they are individuals, so they have different opinions. The reason they like me and the way they look at me are all different. It's hard for me when I talk to my fans too. I can't satisfy everyone perfectly, because everyone has different preferences. I feel especially apologetic towards those who like the cuteness or slyness that I showed in ‘YOU&I’ to the extreme, but I feel that it's time for me to embrace people with different preferences. I think celebrities should also know how to change little by little or transform deeply to satisfy people with other preferences. My fans know. Even the ‘girly’ look I have on stage isn't my real self.

Since you are a musician and a celebrity after all, do you want to become a different character each time to express your songs to the best you can and expand your image by showing that you can perform different types of songs?

IU: That's right. That’s the ideal celebrity, right?

If you are afraid of taking on a challenge, it will be difficult to expand your world of music.

IU: When it comes to my outer appearance, it's entirely up to my company, so that’s how I’m shifting the blame. (Laughs)

That’s unexpected. I thought you would be passionately arguing your way when it comes to music.

IU: When we’re recording songs, my opinion becomes stronger. I totally can't stand songs that I don't like being put on my album. Yet when it comes to things like the visual concept, which is outside of the music itself, there’s nothing I know about it, so I follow my company’s opinion. So if the reactions about things other than the music is not good, it’s like my ego leaves my body and I can pretend not to be myself and laugh along with others while pointing fingers at myself. Since it wasn’t my choice. (Laughs)

Thanks to the fact that you can objectify yourself, your can maintain a healthy mental state. The idea of borrowing from Charlie Chaplin's movie ‘Modern Times’ was also interesting. It was made into a silent film in 1936, during the 10th anniversary of movies with sound, and it was a work that encompassed the present and the past. In that sense, working with musicians like Choi Baek-ho and Yang Hee-eun becomes meaningful.

IU: The theme that my company wanted to included in the album since early on was the integration of the past and the present generations. In my previous album [t/n: Last Fantasy], I worked with Kim Kwang-jin, Yoon Jong-shin, Yoon Sang, Kim Hyun-chul, Lee Juck and Jung Jae-hyung, who are musicians representative of the 1980s and 90s. I also liked the analog emotions of that time period. I was really happy when we decided to collaborate with Choi Baek-ho and Yang Hee-eun, whom I respect a lot, in this album. In this way, I can work with people I respect under the concept of generational harmony? Oh yeah! Our company is the best! (Laughs) It sounds grand, but generational integration is great. I don't know if I will be able to achieve that.

It must have been such a meaningful project for you to be able to work with Choi Baek-ho and Yang Hee-eun, whom you respect.

IU: I learned a lot from them. When I looked up to the sky as someone so much their junior, I would only be able to see under their chin. I haven't even seen their eyes, nose and mouth yet. But even seeing under their chin was amazing.

Specifically, what was amazing about it?

IU: Choi Baek-ho was very passionate. During the recording, he went, ‘I’m sorry. I'll do it again.’ From my point of view, how could it be even more perfect than what I was hearing? I was so touched every time that it made my jaw drop. ‘IU-ssi, I really like your songs.‘ (t/n: in formal tone) He treated me with respect and I was so humbled that I felt like I was flying. If he spoke informally, I would have been happy thinking that we got closer. But it was like he respected a little baby like me. Not only do I respect him as a senior singer, I also felt a sense of awe towards such a wonderful adult. Yang Hee-eun is also very charismatic. I only felt frustrated, thinking that I failed, during the whole 3 minutes while I listened to the completed song, ‘Daydream'. My voice sounds so pathetic after seonsaengnim (teacher)’s voice. I was so shocked that my heart was in tatters. I know that I can't sing better than that even if I record the song again. That's the level of my skill. The depth of the song itself when we sing is different.

It seems that you've learned a lot.

IU: After the recording session, I received a heartwarming text message from Yang Hee-eun-seonsaengnim, saying, ‘I wish I could have put more sincerity in my voice.’ Actually, I don't know what sincerity is yet. I try hard to sing the song so that the composer, the lyricist and I, myself, will like it, but I don't think that's sincerity (t/n: authenticity). If I can sing like seonsaengnim, I want to try and be enlightened in that aspect.

Is that an answer that can only be found after you reach seonsaengnim’s age?

IU: No matter how long it takes, if you can find that depth, it's definitely a huge success. It’s conceited of me to try and compare my voice with seonsaengnim’s voice right now, but the difference is beyond the sky and the ground. It’s as enormous as the difference between the faraway ozone layer and the underground core of the Earth.

There are so many seniors who praised you. In particular, I remember Insooni saying, ‘Little baby, what's inside you?’ Compliments can even make whales dance, right?

IU: Of course, I think she was trying to encourage her junior. It’s scary if she really meant it. I'm afraid I’ll get caught and my real skill level will show, so I'm very scared of the moment that she’ll be disappointed when she finds out. I want to quickly improve my skills before I get caught.

Just like how she is curious about you, I wonder what words you would use to describe yourself?

IU: I think I have a high level of concentration within a short span of time. However, my concentration passes like a jet ski, so I can't stay awesome for more than a minute. I guess I was born as a human customised to cram things (t/n: within a short timeframe). There are also many foods that make me go out of my mind. I have a lot of loopholes. Also, I'm constantly hard on myself because I don't trust myself. I actually don't know what kind of kid I am. I change 120 times a day. I wonder what my real self is and whether someone has true colours. I'm different in front of my mom, brother and my friend. Depending on the situation, although I live through all those moments as who I really am, they're not all the same.

You wrote your own self composition, ‘Bad Day’, as a follow-up to ‘Good Day’. I watched the concert video and it was good.

IU: It was a song I wrote in my 3rd grade of middle school. I forgot about it for awhile and when I was wondering whether there was anything new I could perform at my concert, I pulled it out again. It was a very lonely time for me because I was a trainee back then. When someone treated me warmly with kindness, I felt like I've been twisted into inferiority and became colder on my own. It's like that when people are being foolish.

It's a stormy adolescence that everyone goes through right?

IU: I’m still like that once in awhile nowadays though. I don't like myself, so I don’t like other people either. I see everything in the world in a twisted way and lose my motivation. I ride that roller coaster once in a while.

It's okay as long as you can step on the ground and go up on your own (t/n: succeed with your own abilities).

IU: That’s right. Fortunately, I think that's why when I write songs, my emotions get expressed.

Thanks to your rollercoaster-like emotions, the lyrics must be quite dynamic.

IU: I started writing in a diary because of my loneliness when I was in middle school and I was a trainee. I still write everyday. If I don't have it with me, I have to at least type down a line on my phone to feel at ease. I feel like the day disappears when I fall asleep without writing a diary entry. It's very funny when I look at my old diaries. I could see my past, times when I was really pathetic and pitiful and moments that I thought were lovely. It's secretive and interesting.

In the lyrics of 'Everyone has Secrets’, the line ‘the truth isn’t important to people' left an impression on me. I wondered if it was something I felt in the commotion such as when a rumor news site caught you this time watching a movie with a friend, actor Lee Hyun-woo.

IU: It is something that everyone can relate to. ‘Everyone has secrets. How much do you really know about me?’ That’s what the song is about. When I sing the lyrics now, I think I would make them more powerful. "Did he write the song because of this?" or "Did he write the song for that reason?" I’ll have a lot more stories and better focus. I have no reason to oppose the effect that the lyricist wanted.

The title of ‘Love of B’, with lyrics that you wrote, was also interesting. Anyone can be ‘B’ (t/n: the one who tries harder) in a relationship, but it's a sad thing to hear from a 21-year-old woman.

IU: The one who gives more love will feel that he/she is in the position of ‘B’. In a relationship, it's best to be equal without ‘A’ and ‘B’. Everyone can't always be ‘B’ or always be ‘A’. One year later, the positions could be reversed. You can't be ‘A’ in every relationship either. But if you think about it, I don't think it's a bad thing for ‘B’ either. Of course, loving more can make you feel unfair and upset, but you’re experiencing the maximum feelings of love. There is a happiness that you are filled with by giving love. ‘A’ can't receive as much happiness from receiving the love that ‘B’ gives. When my fans heard the title, they expected it to be a very sad ballad. But the lyrics turned out to be childish and delightful. Someone wrote in a one-line review of the teaser, ‘I thought I was going to be hit and end up crying, but the slap flew away.‘ (t/n: The reviewer thought he/she was going to receive a great impact from the sad song, but it turned out not to be a sad song at all.) It’s a coarse expression, but it was a witty expression that explained the gap between the title and the lyrics.

It’s already your 5th year anniversary since your debut. How have you grown as IU or as a woman, Lee Ji-eun?

IU: I have a slightly higher self-esteem now. But compared to the others, I still seem to be lacking. (Interviewer: Why would you say so?) No matter how much people may belittle me, it can’t be worse than me belittling myself. That’s one thing I’m certain about. You could call it a complex, but on the other hand, because of that, I don’t become conceited, so that’s a good thing, right? It’s paradoxical, but I like the way I am. There are many fools who don’t realize they are fools. Whenever I meet such people, I feel really frustrated. Even if I call them a fool, they don’t realize that they are one. Anyhow, I’m a fool who knows I’m one, so it’s fine. Of course, it’s best to not do foolish things even though I know I’m a fool, but I think this is good enough.

In these 5 years, you’ve realized who you are. Isn’t that splendid?

IU: Also, there are many people who have come to love that side of me. In the last few days, I’ve heard from about 10 people that ‘I’m glad I’m a fool who knows you’re a fool.’ (Laughs)

That sounds like something people very close to you would tell you.

IU: Of course, I won’t show everyone that I’m a fool, but I’m very open in front of people I’m close to. 'I'm a fool, so please be understanding. My friend, you're a fool just like me.' (Laughs) Once we both admit that we're fools, it's a lot easier. Those who don’t know they are fools have a hard time, as they are always afraid of being caught messing up.

Does that bother you?

IU: I’m always feeling anxious. Even when I’m doing interviews like this. I might have a completely different opinion tomorrow. Recently, instead of ‘Yeah, that’s right’, I’ve been replying with stuff like ‘Yeah, I think so.’ I used to see that as being silly. ‘I think my name is Lee Ji-eun.’ I mean, what else could it be? But that’s actually being wise. The next day I might suddenly think, as if I had switched bodies, ‘Come to think of it, I’m not such a fool after all.’ If I go this and that, it’s like this or like that and end it like that, I’ll have to live with the responsibility of what I said. So from now on, I’m going to live with open endings. (Laughs)

Behind the Scenes

21-year-old IU did her cover photoshoot for 6 hours over a span of two days and a 1 hr 4 min 4 sec interview. The last question of the interview was, if the phrase ‘IU-ly’ appeared in the dictionary, what kind of definition would it have? "Someone might see me as a fool, or as a vixen. Each pair of eyes sees me in a different way. It’s just that currently from this viewpoint, I think I’m a fool who has a lot on her mind. That’s the way I see myself." The way IU smiles after she carefully considers and gives her response is really pretty. Just like she says, there are really many fools in the world. It’s unusual to find intelligent fools who admit that they are fools. This is an engine that will continue to be loved by many for a long time. A decent child, a cool person. Without a doubt, such a person will continue to shine brightly for a long time no matter what she does.

Translated by IUteamstarcandy

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