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#she is so endlessly fascinating to me
boneempress · 1 year
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yellowjackets s2 finale spoilers~
I get that a lot of people are upset at the finale for various reasons, one of which is that Misty is the person who did...you know. Putting aside the implications for Natalie's role in the story, I want to talk about Misty because I think it was a crucial turning point for her and I think she had to be the one to do it for her story to progress.
Halfway through season 2, teen Misty learns Crystal is really Kristen and trades this for a secret that she wildly misjudges as being of equal import. Realizing her mistake, she threatens Kristen, who steps back and falls off a cliff. This death both is and isn't her fault; she didn't really mean to kill her, and she didn't actually touch her. It was an accident. She has an out. And, crucially, she gets away with it: no one else is witness to it, Kristen's body has yet to be found.
Fast forward to the hunt, Misty was the one who pulled Natalie back from trying to save Javi. I suspect she probably realized that saving the group's best hunter was the, objectively, most "rational" thing to do for the group, all else aside. (This is the first of multiple times we see Misty steal Natalie away from death before the wilderness finally comes to collect.)
So when Lottie picks Natalie as her successor, and the girls all give their own versions of fealty, Misty's is this incredibly dramatic bow that Nat laughs at. But Misty is dead serious, because I think she is taking this deadly seriously. The wilderness gave her a purpose she never had before so she trapped them all there within it, and Nat is its favorite. Whatever her reasons, I think this is the moment Misty dedicates herself and her life to Nat. It's why she looks so fucking pleased when Natalie shows up in her living room pointing a rifle at her, 25 years later.
Fast forward to Jessica Roberts. Misty tells us that fentanyl is her weapon of choice because it is legal and it looks like an overdose. Moreover, she doesn't just inject Jessica with fentanyl and fake the death afterwards; she injects the cigarettes, and she lets Jessica choose them. Because, after all, those cigarettes would've killed her anyway, a lot slower. So she does what she needs to do, but she still maintains a distance. And she gets away with it.
In season 2, several people have implied to adult Misty that she has serial killer vibes, and it seems to confound her in spite of the multiple deaths she's responsible for (that we've seen.) She goes into a sensory deprivation tank and concludes that she's a "closer" who cleans up messes for her friends - so that she can be useful to them again like she was in the woods - and she will do anything that that entails. She doesn't questions her methods or motives or do even the slightest bit of self-reflection. As horrible as the Crystal incident was for her, a part of her (like Shauna) has always been drawn to violence until it gets too close and personal to her. She was excited when she cut Ben's leg off and when she watched Shauna beat the shit out of Lottie.
So when it comes time for the hunt again, Misty has loaded up a needle with some drug, either phenobarbital or her favorite fentanyl. She will kill if she has to, for the good of the group. When Lisa threatens Nat with a gun she doesn't hesitate and goes in for the kill.
Only, purely by the good will of Natalie for Lisa, Misty misses her target, and she kills her best friend (again) instead, accidentally frames clean and sober Nat for a relapsed drug overdose, the person she pledged fealty to, the person she was willing to die for, the one person in the entire world whose death could possibly make her stop and question herself, wonder if maybe using violence to solve all her problems is a bad thing, if maybe bringing "it" back with her so gleefully was NOT a good thing. Maybe, just maybe, she will start thinking about the dark and terrible secret she hides - the black box she destroyed and doomed all of her friends with. Part of the reason adult Misty is so fun to watch is because of the delusional levels of self-confidence she possesses, and this is the one and only thing that I think could really shake her to her core. Crystal's death got pretty close when she was 17 and had a lot less armor, but Natalie is someone she has been trauma bonded to for 25 years. She gets away with it in the eyes of the law, yet again, but she knows what she did, and that she can never take it back. She has to live with it. She has to live with the worst possible consequence that playing with other people's lives could have for her.
And that's why it had to be Misty.
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imagine ianthe's suffering rn. its so funny to me. girl all u wanted was power and i respect that but turns out that the side effect of power isnt the moral implications or whatever, its dealing with god's personal drama.
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uncanny-tranny · 6 months
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When I find it hard to do certain things, I like to pretend I am a neanderthal living in a cave with my clan, and I must do The Thing in order to survive.
So, when I'm doing cardio at the gym, I'm actually chasing and tracking a mammoth, and when I need to cook, well, I'm not cooking on a stove top, I am hurdled over the first fire and watching the fat of our kill drip down onto the burning wood. And when I find it hard to crochet, I pretend that the first winter storm is coming and our clan needs me to make blankets to hurdle under and that I must contribute.
I hope whatever you do to do The Things will help. It is a uniquely personable trait to motivate yourself through pretend and stories. That's what makes this life interesting - that's what makes you feel larger than yourself 💛
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sparky-is-spiders · 5 months
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S1 Jonsasha AU where Sasha is the Archivist and they start slowly spiraling as they uncover more and more mysteries. Their fascination with The Horrors drives them into each other’s arms. They stay later and later. The storage closet becomes a shared living space for them. Martin hasn’t noticed. Tim doesn’t know what to say to get his friends back. They’re losing themselves in the Archives. They egg each other on. They start becoming more paranoid. Jon is so endlessly, doggedly loyal. This is the only person who can understand him. This is the only person who he has ever understood. They love each other so so much.
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sounwise · 2 years
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“Paul McCartney’s secret love affair” (interview with Maggie McGivern in the Daily Mail, April 12, 1997)
[Full transcript beneath the cut:]
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Millions of words have been written about The Beatles — but little, if anything, is known of a girl called Maggie McGivern.
Yet now it can be revealed for the first time that she is the woman who had a secret affair with Paul McCartney for more than three years.
They were the years songs such as Paperback Writer, Strawberry Fields Forever and All You Need Is Love were enchanting the world.
More pertinently they included the years in which he had his relationship with actress Jane Asher, and when he met the woman who would become Linda McCartney.
The saga begins early in 1966 when Maggie was working as a nanny for Marianne Faithfull and her husband, John Dunbar, a Cambridge graduate and artist.
Their son, Nicholas, had been born the previous November. Marianne had a third-floor flat in Chelsea, in the heart of what was then Swinging London, the capital city of the Sixties. For more than three years The Beatles had been storming the pop charts — and society.
Help! was the sensation of the previous summer and the double-sided Day Tripper/We Can Work It Out was in the charts. Beatlemania was everywhere and Maggie, through her new job, would quickly get used to rubbing shoulders with the famous.
One day when the buzzer rang on the intercom for the flat, she didn’t recognise the voice from the ground floor. The young man asked if John was around. ‘Who is it?’ said Maggie. ‘Paul McCartney,’ said the voice. ‘Oh — come up . . .’
‘Paul ran up the stairs and came in,’ she recalls. ‘Very casually I told him John wasn’t really in — and that sent us both into hysterics. We were laughing and chatting.
‘I had made a nice lunch for Marianne and a bunch of her friends but they never showed up. Paul and I sat together and ate it instead. I’ll never forget the meal — it was chicken casserole. It was such a funny introduction that it threw us both off guard. It could have been very embarrassing, but there was an immediate rapport and we just couldn’t stop talking.’
Maggie, whose once-dark hair is now dyed honey-blonde, told how she and Paul became closer in the months that followed, even though they each had a separate relationship.
Maggie had a photographer boyfriend and McCartney was seeing a pretty young actress called Jane Asher, living for a time in her parents’ house before she moved in with him.
‘It was a gradual thing,’ says Maggie. ‘From that point on Paul kept coming up to the flat. He was very good friends with John but I knew he was coming to see me.
‘He would ring and ask if anyone was there and if there wasn’t, he would come up. We used to talk about lots of things but it was obvious to both of us that our other relationships were not going well.’
It took six months before their association, as Maggie puts it, turned from friendship to love. The Beatles had been recording their Revolver album, released at the end of summer 1966.
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One evening McCartney, John Dunbar and some friends returned from Paris with some demo tapes of the album and played them for Maggie. ‘There was something in the air that night and that’s how it all started,’ she says. ‘He ended up staying the night and we went to bed. It was wonderful.
‘The next morning was one of the most previous moments of my life. We didn’t say much but it was such a tranquil, pleasant feeling — made all the more so because we left things unsaid. He stayed with me until lunchtime and we chatted and larked about. Everything with Paul was so natural. From that moment on he used to come around regularly.’
By this stage The Beatles had stopped doing live performances and tours but McCartney was putting just as much effort into recording. Maggie was frequently abroad on modelling assignments.
‘When we were having our love affair, I hardly phoned him,’ she says. ‘He used to find me wherever I was, and that was fine as far as I was concerned. He did tell me that Jane Asher had moved in with him at his house in St John’s Wood and I remember saying that it meant nothing to me.
‘Throughout the relationship I never pursued him — I just didn’t think about him having other women. My view on relationships has always been that if something works, it works. If it’s meant to be, let it be. Besides which, I had a busy life, and I was very busy living it.
‘Our relationship was a secret from day one, at first because we didn’t want Jane to find out, and later because we preferred it like that. We hardly ever went to parties. We would occasionally go to restaurants but normally we’d walk his dogs in Regent’s Park or go for drives in the country.
‘We craved isolation and I for one did not want to become an overnight superstar — I certainly wasn’t ready for that emotionally.’
Secrecy, of course, was vital for the continued success of their relationship. Maggie, who now lives in Brighton and works as a rollerblade instructor, says: ‘I don’t believe celebrities when they say they can’t keep affairs secret. We managed it quite well for more than three years.’
She described a trip to Paris in 1966 with John Lennon and The Beatles’ manager, Brian Epstein. All of them flew into France separately — Lennon had been filming abroad and Epstein had been away on business. Maggie and Paul, she says, traveled apart ‘as part of keeping the relationship secret’. During the five-day trip the foursome stayed at the same Paris hotel where she and Paul shared a luxury suite. ‘It was a marvelous holiday,’ she says. ‘. . . just walking around the streets of Paris.
‘My abiding memory is of me, John and Paul lying under the Eiffel Tower, gazing up at it. We couldn’t go up because we would have been recognised, and we were masters at the art of avoiding people.
‘Throughout the relationship we never met in obvious places. We would go to places like auction rooms in South Kensington, and say “whoops — fancy meeting you here”.’
By this point, Maggie saw Paul as a permanent fixture in her life, but gave no serious thought to marriage or children.
Maggie was 20 and McCartney 23 when they met. At the time, she says, she had no conception of the enormity of the scene in which she was involved. ‘I know it really sounds strange but I didn’t really regard it as a big deal. They were mad times and the world was changing. People look back on it now as an era — but all we were doing was living in it.
‘I knew in my heart that Paul was a real family man — when I was working at Marianne’s we used to spend hours just looking at little Nicholas. It was obvious Paul wanted children but, at that stage, I was in no way ready for it. I was a free spirit.’
Maggie worked for Marianne and John for about 18 months before leaving to set up an antiques stall in Chelsea Market. Even without that direct line to the famous, however, she still saw a great deal of McCartney.
She had a shared flat in Chelsea, but she was still busy modelling, and had appeared as an extra in films, including Blow-Up, which was released in 1966.
At one stage, she says, Paul had wanted her to be a chorus girl in The Beatles’ production of Magical Mystery Tour, which was screened on TV over Christmas 1967, but he couldn’t locate her and chose another girl, also called Maggie.
By now their relationship was becoming serious, she says: ‘By this time he knew that I was in love with him, and I knew he loved me, too.
‘I never told any friends that we were seeing each other — that was an unspoken rule. My mum and dad knew, but not in any detail.
‘I used to spend many nights at his house in St John’s Wood. It was a beautiful Regency house, and his garden was full of Alice In Wonderland characters built in stone. We spent many romantic times there. At the end of the garden was a glass-topped, circular, domed building where we meditated. I’ll never forget the first time he showed me that place.
‘We went inside the dome and he told me to stand on the floor. Suddenly, the floor started rising and there I was, up in the air, looking at the stars. After that we used to spend a lot of time together on the raised platform looking at the stars.
‘That’s what it was like, you see. By the time he and The Beatles were into the Maharishi and that whole scene, so was I — there were amazing parallels in our personalities.’
One day the couple went to the Indica Gallery in London with a group of showbiz friends, where John Lennon met Yoko Ono.
‘We spent more time with John and than we did with George and Ringo — we hardly saw them at all.’
In the summer of 1968, McCartney’s engagement to Jane Asher ended. Later, it emerged that she had arrived back at their house to find him with another woman — not Maggie, but an American called Francie Schwartz.
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Maggie says: ‘By September 1968 I had rented a flat on my own in Fawcett Street, Chelsea. I really wanted to live alone. I hadn’t been there long when one day I got a telegram at my flat from Paul. It said: “Flying to the sun. Car picking you up at 8pm. Love Paul.”
‘I was so excited because I had no idea where we were going. A car drew up and we went to pick up Paul at St John’s Wood. As he came out he took an Instamatic camera from a fan, who was camped outside his house, and told us he was borrowing it to take on holiday.
‘Paul had hired a private jet so no one would spot us. There was a proper lounge, no rows of seats — we were drinking champagne and laughing and joking with a male cousin of Paul, and his American girlfriend. I kept asking him where we were going, but he refused to tell me.’
The plane landed in Sardinia but Maggie had no idea where she was until she spotted a sign. They had a hotel suite overlooking the ocean.
Much of their time was spent in restaurants where, she says, they were ‘treated like royalty’. At one banquet in their honour, they walked into a room full of women dressed in ballgowns. Maggie had a T-shirt dress. ‘Paul and I just collapsed in giggles,’ she says. ‘We thought it was hilarious.’
Most of their time, however, was spent on the golden sands. Indeed, while they were on the beach, two things happened which changed the course of their relationship.
First, they were spotted by a photographer — a picture of them together appeared in a Sunday newspaper back home. The report described her as his ‘new girlfriend’.
Maggie confirmed that they had been going out together — and suddenly the world knew of their secret liaison.
More significantly, perhaps, it may have changed the way they viewed themselves.
Maggie explains: ‘We were lying on the beach just being young and in love. Paul turned to me, smiling, and out of the blue he just said: “Have you ever thought about getting married?”
‘I said: “Yes, I suppose, one day . . .” and I thought nothing more of it. Looking back, it was obviously the wrong answer. When I said “one day” I meant in six months, maybe, but not never.
‘But Paul was always slightly insecure and probably saw me as such a free spirit that he thought I was never going to settle down.
‘On the journey home we were singing Those Were The Days and falling around laughing. I went back to Paul’s house with him — I distinctly remember waltzing around the room with him.’
Paul and Maggie continued to see each other in the following months but the subject of marriage was never mentioned again, she says.
‘I suppose I assumed we would end up together but at the time I was just enjoying it all. In the Sixties there was so much going on that I didn’t have time to sit and think about the future. I suppose that, with the pressures of fame, Paul was craving security.’
He would find it, it transpired, with an American blonde called Linda Eastman.
Maggie says: ‘One day, a little while after we returned from Sardinia, I rang Paul — and Linda answered the phone. I had seen a newspaper story about him having lunch with her before that, but I wasn’t the type to ask questions or get jealous.
‘I remember Paul telling Linda to get off the phone and I asked him who she was and what was happening. He said: “I don’t know the scene, man. I don’t know what’s going on.” ’
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By late 1968 and 1969, The Beatles had massively increased the following of the Flower Power and hippie movement in Britain. It was a time of freedom, free love, drugs and music.
But for McCartney it was also, it seems, a time of emotional confusion.
Maggie remembers McCartney arriving at her flat late one night. ‘He was really down and I couldn’t seem to get a word out of him,’ she says. ‘He was crying and I knew he had been stressed. I stood and held him and asked him to tell me what was wrong. Then suddenly he jumped up and he said he had to go. Somehow I knew when I closed the door that night I wouldn’t see him again.’
A couple of days later she was walking along the King’s Road when she noticed four words on a newspaper billboard: ‘Paul and Linda marry.’
‘My heart just thumped,’ she says. ‘I couldn’t believe it. He never told me he was getting married and he never told me our relationship was over. I didn’t contact him for ages. I had never pursued him and I wasn’t going to start then.
‘Not many people knew we were going out together in the first place so there was no point in telling them it was over. Obviously, I told my mum and dad but not even they knew the depths of my suffering and depression.
‘Looking back, I think I was in serious shock and it didn’t come out properly until years later.’
Until yesterday, Maggie has never felt able to discuss her true feelings about the relationship and the separation. The remarkable story emerged only after her mother, Evelyn, confirmed details to the Daily Mail.
Maggie agreed to speak only reluctantly — she said she would always care for Paul, and desperately wants to avoid upsetting him and his wife Linda, who is fighting cancer.
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Subsequently Maggie started a relationship with rock musician Denny Laine and it was through him, after he joined McCartney’s group Wings, that she saw Paul again, in 1971 or 1972.
‘It was a very emotional meeting and we had a great big hug. We were standing there gripping each other when there was a tap on his shoulder. We turned around and it was Linda. Paul told her who I was and she said she had heard about me. There was, of course, an unfriendly atmosphere and we didn’t get a chance to have a real conversation.’
The next time Maggie ran into Paul she was seeing her husband-to-be, Mel Collins, whom she married in 1974 after falling pregnant with their daughter, Naiama. This meeting was also difficult, she says. ‘There were a lot of sarcastic comments towards me.’
Six years passed before she saw him again. Maggie was shopping with her daughter at Harvey Nichols in London when she decided to try on a designer dress.
‘I was looking at myself in the mirror when a voice said: “That looks great.” It was Paul . . . he was buying Christmas presents for Linda. We got talking for a little while and then just said our goodbyes. We never discussed the relationship or anything like that.’
It was only at a later meeting, at a film studio in 1984, that she remembers rediscovering some of their earlier rapport. But it vanished when Linda appeared. Maggie says: ‘Paul’s whole demeanor changed — he’s a different person when he’s with her.
‘But, to give Linda credit, although we were still uneasy we chatted quite amiably about horses and things like that. I suppose after years of marriage and several children, there was no need for any nastiness.’
That was the last time Maggie saw McCartney, but she admits to thinking about him almost daily.
‘Marriage? I’m the type to move on and live my life and not regret anything,’ she says, ‘but obviously I still feel the pain. I kick myself for that day on the beach in Sardinia.’
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rad-roche · 1 year
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chit-chattin about voiced protagonist and pre-war stuff
i'm not big on the whole voiced fallout protagonist thing, don't get me wrong, it was an attempt to ape mass effect and that format had its problems anyway, but i think the actors are charismatic enough that i don't hate it on principle. the biggest problem arises in the 'four buttons for all options' speech system. to account for your psuedo-shep, npc and companion dialogue has to be scaled way, way back and be more expository and functional. there are a reason companions are far and away the most popular aspect of the game, and i'm saying that as somebody big in on a particular one because they conjured an interesting guy by what may be total accident. they get to be characters and have a distinct voice. everybody else either has to tell you, upfront, what their deal is or hide it behind a speech check so obvious that you can infer it yourself. the game isn't devoid of them, cricket for example, but there aren't too many
but i think the biggest missed opportunity, more than the valentine kellogg brain thing, is that the game picks up a person mired in a regressive, stagnant system, somebody who would know it intimately (lawyer) or enforce it through violence (soldier), dumps them in a future where these fixed points of their reality no longer exist, everybody dead, and forgets that this may in fact be an interesting vein to dig out. you're a soldier and the war you fought in killed BILLIONS of people and warped the face of the earth forever and, unlike the ghouls, it's totally fresh for you! and it sort of doesn't come up? you get a couple of offhand reactions but that's about it. your character isn't a fish out of water, they're somebody who got off at the wrong bus stop and has to stop a passing stranger for directions. oh wow, only center for learning left in the city is a ten foot cube in the baseball stadium teaching basic literacy, huh? I saw MIT at its peak two days ago! bye! you could blindfold anybody, tape them to a chair, spin them at centrifuge speed and make them throw darts with their mouth and i bet you nine out of ten times they'd hit something fascinating with that basic premise. let's try it with this guy. let's see here. 'find missing baby'. oh god oh shit it's john bethesda oh f
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laurasbailey · 1 year
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something about kty being around my age and likely being an introverted nerdy ex-fandom girly who has worked her ass off in multiple artistic pursuits to get where she is makes me emotional actually
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every now and then I just spontaneously remember that Arkk exists and that he was coded as a member of Scarlet's Army for reasons left entirely unexplained and I just go. huh.
#my posts#GW2#Guild Wars 2#arkk fascinates me for many many reasons tbh#aside from him being another entertaining antagonist with funny dialogue he's just. interesting.#there's an inherent tragedy to characters that are doomed by the narrative not just once but eternally#it's not enough that he can never win. he can also never stop trying and failing endlessly forever. he hasn't just lost he is Always Losing#every time he thinks it's the first time but the truth is he's already been dead in all the ways that matter for a long long time.#he's a ghost that will never find peace because his grave is a recording that will replay continuously until the universe itself unravels.#man. his plot arc is short but surprisingly compelling for what it is. i still think about it a lot tbh#anyway hcing that he knew Scarlet/Ceara at some point and that's why he's in her 'army' for coding purposes#you would've thought they'd make him like. inquest. but nope they did that and I still wonder what the thinking was tbh#timeline-wise it'd probably make the most sense if he was already in the Inquest building up a debt by the time she joined there#with his departure into the Mists most likely taking place sometime shortly after her expulsion from Rata Sum#i need to think about him and Dessa more tbh (especially since they're both core characters at the Turnabout... haha...)#you thought I was just kidnapping Mai Trin? joke's on YOU I adopt EVERY character that canon leaves in the dumpster#and they didn't do anything with finding the 'real' Dessa or Arkk in SotO so I doubt they ever will. which means... mine now.#it's free real estate! stuffs them both in a bag and carries them away never to be seen or heard from again
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novelconcepts · 1 month
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One of the most fundamentally interesting things to me about YJ and writing fic, specifically, is how the blame changes hands depending on the story. On whose perspective you're writing from. On whose story it is at a given moment. The very thing I dislike about viewers missing the point becomes so fascinating to me from within the narrative. Who are these characters when seen through the eyes of their peers?
Who does Jackie become? If you're Shauna, she's the love of your life, and your greatest rival, and the other half of your soul, and the person you blame for your dead dreams. If you're Van, she's the respected captain who earns none of your respect in the woods, the one who left you to die without blinking, the easiest target for teenage malice. If you're Natalie, she's competition for affection, the blabbermouth who can't leave well enough alone, the hands putting themselves to no good use. If you're Jackie? You're just a girl. You're so tired. You're so scared. You're losing face a little more every day, and you're made of despair, and you can't even trust your best friend. It's not your fault. It's not your fault. It's not your fault.
Who does Lottie become? If you're Natalie, she's your direct foil, the splinter under the edge of your thumbnail, the smart mouth to match your own, the confusing amalgamation of normal friend and mad ritual. If you're Misty, she's the first shred of obvious power in months, a leader who might need to be nudged back into line, a fascinating exercise in hitching your wagon to the right star early on. If you're Taissa, she's flat-nuts and endlessly frustrating, she's got your girlfriend's full attention, she's incredibly dangerous. If you're Lottie? You're just a girl. You're so tired. You're so scared. You've built a pedestal you can't keep your balance on, and you're not sure if you're right or going crazy, and you didn't want this. It's not your fault. It's not your fault. It's not your fault.
From outside the narrative, there is no bad guy. There is no blame. It is no one's fault. It is Man v. Nature, they are doing the best they can with an impossible situation. They're all trying to contribute what they can to the story, for better or worse.
From inside the narrative, you are a teenager trapped in a society constructed entirely of bare-bones-survival with the wildest assortment of girls. From inside the narrative, to stay human, you have to love and fight, respect and judge. Every story changes the game. Every story shifts the blame. A hero in one has the bloodiest hands in the next. And that, to me, is such a thrilling sandbox to play in.
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wholoveseggs · 2 months
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Heyy gorgeous! I’m here once again lol. I was thinking about enemies to lovers this time. Elijah and reader despise each other. She’s always getting on his nerves and he’s always making her embarrassed etc etc. She’s also misbehaving - like interrupting him mid sentence, being sassy and he’s just trying to hold it together. One day they get into a fight or they have to train together (like he did with Gia in s.2) and there’s just too much sexual tension between them. Some angry sex and so on…? Thank youuu🥰
Misbehavior
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18+ ---- {Masterlist} {Tag-List}
Elijah Mikaelson is controlling, arrogant and absolutely infuriating, you don't know how anybody can stand him. That is... until he gets you in his bed.
♡♡ Thanks for the request lovely @msveronicag ! I love this idea so much and I got a little carried away with it ♡♡
8.2k words - Warnings: smut, dom!elijah, blowjobs, choking, spanking, rough sex, tinsy bit of ass play, Elijah being a smug little control freak...
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You were back in New Orleans, visiting your old friend Marcel. He turned you nearly fifty years ago and he had always been a mentor figure for you. You left the city to go travel the world and discovered everything it had to offer. But you always remembered your roots, and Marcel was still the man you looked up to the most. So, when he called, asking if you wanted to come help him keep the peace and order in the city, you were happy to agree.
You knew the Originals had arrived in town and you were interested in meeting them. They were an endlessly fascinating bunch of lunatics from what you heard, and you couldn't wait to meet them.
But when you finally got the chance, you were surprised by a few things, number one, they were all ridiculously hot.
And number two, you instantly hated Elijah Mikaelson.
He was just so arrogant and stuck up. His constant use of posh words annoyed you to no end, and his perfect hair was just begging to be ruffled.
He just strolled into Marcel's loft one day and started giving orders. Talking to Marcel in a way that immediately pissed you off. You didn't like to hear your friend being talked to like he was beneath anyone, and so you spoke up.
"Excuse me," You drawled lazily, looking up from where you were perched on Marcel's couch. "Just because you're some original pain in the ass doesn't mean you get to control everything."
Elijah was clearly used to being obeyed. He slowly turned to you, regarding you with that arrogant sneer you came to detest in just a matter of minutes. You looked up at him, meeting his eyes unflinchingly.
"I beg your pardon?" He asked, looking at you as if he could barely see you.
You hated when someone pretended not to hear or understand something. Especially when they understood perfectly well, but were hoping for you to be scared into backing down. Well, that wasn't happening.
"If you didn't understand, I'll repeat it in simple terms that even your elderly ears will comprehend," You snapped at him, standing up to meet his eyes more equally. "Be. Nice."
He gave you a slow, crooked smile that didn't reach his eyes, then he looked back to Marcel with his eyebrows raised. "Are you going to control your little pet?"
You saw red, and opened your mouth to respond, but Marcel gave you a look that screamed 'don't', so you kept quiet, glaring at Elijah.
You couldn't stand the man, the way he would always be wearing a suit, his perfectly styled hair, and those dark, judgmental eyes that seemed to always be on you, looking down at you.
He was just one of those rich assholes who saw a regular person like you as something lesser, and you weren't going to let him walk over you. You'd think after living for one thousand years he would have gained some insight on human behavior, but no, he was just an old, pompous jerk.
You weren't sure what the hell Elijah and his siblings had done to Marcel to make him act the way he did around the Mikaelsons. But he was different around them. More obedient and less himself. You didn't like how the Originals acted like they owned the city.
Regardless, you weren't stupid enough to make enemies out of them. They were valuable allies, so you kept quiet for the most part, and just rolled your eyes and sighed whenever Elijah would open his arrogant mouth.
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Marcel needed you to help train some new vampires that had turned recently. You would have them do drills and spar. Things were going well, the new recruits acclimating well to their new state of being.
When you saw Elijah and Marcel enter the room, you immediately felt defensive, you knew that prick was going to say something.
Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at him, his presence putting everyone on edge.
"Keep training," You said, gesturing for them to keep practicing. They were hesitant at first, but did as you instructed.
You walked towards Elijah and Marcel, trying to get the man to leave before he said something wrong and ruined their progress. You stood between the two men and looked up at Elijah with a forced, tight smile.
"Is there something you need? I'm a little busy here." You told him.
He raised his eyebrows at your tone, looking at you as if he was studying you, his eyes moving from the top of your head to your feet, and it felt like he was stripping you naked. He glanced around the room at the others with an amused smirk, and it irked you to no end. He turned his eyes back to you, tilting his head.
"They're not doing very well, are they?" He said, looking down at the trainees.
One of the vampires completely missed their punch and fell over, they were still adjusting to how strong they had become.
You sighed, rolling your eyes. "They're new, they're not perfect yet. And you're not helping, your presence is distracting them." You told him. You weren't about to admit he was right. You weren't going to give him that satisfaction.
“They need a proper example on how to fight,” He smirked and looked at Marcel. "Perhaps a demonstration is in order."
Marcel nodded, then stepped forward. "Come on, I'll show them." He said.
But Elijah shook his head, holding his hand up. "I'm not talking about you."
You raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms. "I'm not sparring with you, Elijah. You're too powerful." You told him.
You weren't scared, you knew you could handle yourself. But, he was an original, and you were just a vampire. He would win, easily. And you had no interest in being humiliated by him.
"It's just a friendly match, it doesn't have to be a contest," He said, and you didn't believe him for a second. "Unless you're afraid of getting hurt." He taunted.
You could tell he was enjoying this, he had a small smile on his face, his eyes shining with amusement. He knew you couldn't back down. If you did, he'd call you weak, and a coward. That's just the kind of guy he was.
You rolled your eyes and sighed, getting into a defensive position.
"Ready?" He asked, and you nodded.
Before you could even react, he punched you, and you went flying across the room, landing on your side, and you heard him chuckle. "This is who you got to train your recruits Marcellus?"
You growled and stood, launching yourself at him, and he dodged your hits easily. He grabbed you and twisted your arm, holding it behind your back, and you hissed at the pain. He pulled you closer, and his lips were next to your ear. "Yield."
"Never," You snarled, and he laughed.
"So, prideful, but I can break your arm and force you to yield." He said, twisting your arm more.
"C'mon Elijah, let her go," Marcel said, and Elijah smirked.
"As you wish," Elijah said, releasing your arm, and you turned to face him, glaring. "I thought you were stronger than that, but I was clearly mistaken."
You didn't want to give him the satisfaction of knowing how much that hurt.
"I think that's enough for today," Marcel said to the vampires, and they all filed out, leaving the three of you alone.
"I don't know why you insist on acting the way you do," Elijah said, shaking his head. "It's quite unbecoming."
You raised your eyebrows. "Oh yeah, and how exactly do I act?" You challenged.
"Childish and impulsive." He answered, and you scoffed. "You need to learn some manners." He added.
You couldn't believe what you were hearing. He was insulting you, and talking down to you, and it just pissed you off even more.
"Enough, both of you," Marcel said, getting in between the two of you. "You're both acting like children."
"Maybe because I'm dealing with a child," You muttered under your breath, and Marcel gave you a stern look.
"She's disrespectful, and ungrateful," Elijah said. "Perhaps I should teach her a lesson in obedience." He threatened, his eyes flashing darkly.
"No one needs to be taught a lesson in anything," Marcel said, looking pointedly at you. "Just. Stop." He sighed. "Both of you, just stop. I have a headache, and you two arguing isn't helping."
You glared at Elijah, and he glared back, but neither of you said anything. Marcel let out a long sigh and walked away, his fingers squeezing the bridge of his nose. "I need a drink," He muttered.
You watched him go, feeling a little guilty for upsetting him. He had a lot on his mind and he needed your help, not your petty arguments with Elijah.
"He's right, you know," Elijah said, and you turned your glare on him.
"You think I'm the problem? You're the one who antagonizes me, and talks down to everyone. What's your deal, anyways?" You asked, crossing your arms.
His lips turned up into a smug smile, "I'm not trying to upset you. I'm simply stating the truth."
"I don't like you." You said, shaking your head.
"The feeling is mutual," He said, and you raised an eyebrow.
"What the hell did I ever do to you?" You asked, and he laughed, moving closer to you.
"You constantly have your mouth open, yet nothing of substance comes out. You look down on me, despite knowing nothing of my past, and you think I owe you something. Your insolence is tiresome, and I'm sick of seeing your face." He said, his eyes boring into yours, and his gaze was so intense it was hard to maintain eye contact.
He was so close to you now, and his eyes flicked down to your lips, then back up. "Your mere presence is distracting."
You swallowed hard, feeling your heart hammering in your chest. You were angry, but you also wanted him. You hated that, but it was a truth you were having a hard time denying. You couldn't stop your eyes from moving over his body, and the way his stupid suit fit him so well, showing off his body.
"Well I think you are a self-righteous prick who can't accept the fact that people are allowed to have opinions that differ from yours. Just because you've lived for a millennia doesn't mean your opinion is more valuable than mine." You said, your eyes going to his lips, then back up. "You need to chill the fuck out and not take yourself so seriously. We aren't all your fucking minions. We don't all bow down and worship you."
He leaned in and his breath was fanning over your face. "You have got me all wrong."
"I don't think I do," You said, tilting your head up. "And you don't scare me."
His lips curved into a smirk and his eyes looked down at your lips, his hands coming up and gripping your waist.
And then he was kissing you.
His lips moved slowly over yours, and his hand cupped your jaw. He kissed you with such tenderness and care that you didn't know how to react. You didn't know if he was just using this as a way to humiliate you, but you were too far gone, and you kissed him back.
You knew it was a bad idea, but you couldn't stop yourself, and you didn't care anymore. He pulled you closer and his tongue swiped at your lower lip, and you let him in, moaning softly as his tongue moved over yours. He was an excellent kisser, and it annoyed you as much as it turned you on.
He pulled back, a smug smile on his face, "that's what I thought."
You blushed and looked away, your head spinning from the kiss. "Asshole."
He laughed and stepped away from you, adjusting his tie, "You're welcome."
You were so annoyed and flustered, and you glared at him. "Fuck off."
He chuckled and left, leaving you standing there, confused and aroused.
He was infuriating.
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You had decided to leave New Orleans. You hated that Elijah was getting to you, and you didn't want to risk him using your feelings against you. You knew it was a mistake, he was messing with you in ways you didn't even think possible. You knew about his reputation of being manipulative and cruel, and you weren't going to get sucked into his game.
You had everything ready to go, you just had to tell Marcel. He would understand, although you weren't going to tell him about Elijah kissing you. That was just embarrassing.
But when you got to his loft, the only person there was Elijah. Sitting on the sofa, reading a book. He looked so good he was practically glowing, and you wanted to punch him for it.
He didn't look up from his book, "Marcel is out."
"I'll come back later," You said, turning, but he was in front of you, blocking the exit.
"We need to have a little chat," He said, looking down at you, and you sighed, crossing your arms.
"About what?" You asked, tapping your foot anxiously and looking at the door, wishing you could escape.
"Why are you avoiding me?" He asked, and you laughed, rolling your eyes.
"I'm not avoiding you, I have better things to do than waste my time with an arrogant prick," You said, and he narrowed his eyes at you.
"That's not true," He said, taking a step closer, and you took a step back, not liking the intensity of his gaze.
"Yes, it is." You said, your heart pounding in your chest.
"Why did you come here?" He asked, moving closer again, and you walked backwards until your back hit the wall, and he was caging you in.
"To tell Marcel I am leaving." You said, and he cocked his head.
"Where are you going?" He asked, and you frowned.
"Away."
"Why?" He asked, leaning forward, his face inches from yours.
"Fuck off." You said, exasperated by his line of questioning, it was none of his business.
His eyes flashed dangerously and he grabbed your wrists, pinning them above your head, holding them tightly.
"You are not as smart as you think you are," he growled, his lips inches away from yours.
You could feel his arousal pressing against your stomach, his hips pushing into yours.
"Neither are you," you snarled, trying to get out of his grip.
But he held your wrists tightly and leaned down, his teeth scraping against your neck.
"You talk so much, yap, yap, yap. But you never say anything meaningful," he whispered, his breath hot on your ear, "perhaps I should put your mouth to better use."
Your heart was beating frantically and your pussy was soaked. The tension between the two of you was finally breaking and the hatred was dissolving into something else entirely.
"I'd love to see you tr-"
His mouth was on yours before you could finish your sentence. It was rough and needy, his fangs digging into your lip, and his hands still pinning your wrists above your head.
His knee moved between your thighs and you moaned, rubbing yourself on his leg.
Elijah chuckled darkly, his tongue tracing the wound he'd made.
"How pathetic," he murmured, his hips rolling forward, his hard cock pressing against your core.
"So is your dick," you lied, trying not to gasp at the sensation, it definitely didn’t feel pathetic.
His fingers dug into your wrists, his eyes flashing with amusement and arousal. His free hand slipped underneath your dress, stroking your wet pussy.
"And yet here you are, dripping wet, and ready for me," he smirked, his fingers slowly circling the sensitive bundle of nerves. "Wearing a cheap, skimpy dress, practically begging me to fuck you,"
"Yeah, keep telling yourself that," you groaned, your hips moving in rhythm with his hand.
He slid his middle finger inside your cunt, pumping it in and out, his palm grinding against your clit.
"Oh so, this is all just a figment of my imagination, is it?" He asked, adding another finger.
Your legs were shaking, and your breathing was heavy. You couldn't think straight, his fingers were hitting all the right spots.
"Fuck," you moaned, your back arching.
He kissed you hungrily, his tongue dominating your mouth, and his fingers pumping faster.
"Cum for me," he demanded, his teeth grazing your neck.
"No," you moaned, but your hips were moving on their own, seeking release.
"I wasn't asking, darling," he growled, his eyes meeting yours, compelling you, "Cum."
His voice echoed in your head, and you could feel the wave of pleasure wash over you. Your orgasm ripped through you, his fingers still moving inside you, drawing out every last bit of pleasure.
You were trembling, your legs barely holding you up, and your brain fuzzy.
He let go of your wrists, and pulled his fingers out of you, before licking them clean. He took a step back, smiling at the look on your face as he adjusted his cufflinks.
"Now, on your knees," he commanded.
Your legs obeyed immediately, sinking down and looking up at him.
"What a lovely sight," he said, smirking.
He cupped your chin, running his thumb over your lips.
"I've been imagining your lips around my cock, since the first day I saw you," he said, unbuckling his belt, giving your cheek a little slap.
"Now open up and take it all,"
You opened your mouth and he shoved his cock inside. He was big, bigger than anyone you had ever sucked off. And he wasn't shy about using his power to keep you in place. His hands were tangled in your hair, tugging and pulling, and his cock was hitting the back of your throat.
Your eyes were watering, but he didn't care, he kept going, using your mouth, making you gag. He felt amazing on your tongue, hot and hard, and the taste of him was driving you crazy. You could feel yourself getting wetter, the more he fucked your mouth, and your hips were rocking, desperate for friction.
"Look at you, taking it so well, such a good girl," he praised, his thrusts becoming deeper, and his voice sounding strained.
Your eyes met his, your mascara running down your cheeks. He looked so good, his lips parted and his eyes glazed with lust. His dominating nature was intoxicating, and you were drunk on his cock. The feeling of him sliding down your throat, and his moans of pleasure, made you feel so good, it was addictive. Your hand slipped between your thighs, rubbing your clit, and making yourself moan around his cock.
He slapped your face gently, tutting.
"Naughty girl," he said, his voice a low rumble, "keep touching yourself, and I'll punish you."
You looked up at him, and rubbed yourself faster, daring him to stop you.
His eyes darkened, and he pushed himself deep inside your mouth, his cock pulsing as he cummed down your throat.
"Swallow it," he ordered, and you did, licking his cock clean.
You were a mess, your makeup smeared, and your body trembling with need. You wanted to be fucked. So. Badly.
Elijah looked at you, a smirk playing on his lips. He grabbed you by your hair and pulled you to your feet, his eyes roaming over your body.
"Such a pretty thing," he said, pushing you back against the wall, his fingers teasing the sensitive skin of your neck, "I knew you could behave."
He pulled his handkerchief out and wiped the tears and mascara from your face, before putting it away.
"There we are," he smiled, tucking his cock back into his pants, and buckling his belt.
"Are you not going to fuck me?" You asked, frustrated that he was leaving you unsatisfied.
"Oh no, my dear, that's your punishment," he said, grabbing a bottle of scotch and pouring a glass. He glanced up at you, seemingly confused on why you were still standing there, and nodded towards the door.
"You may go,"
You huffed, and walked towards the door, feeling angry and humiliated. But his voice stopped you.
"Oh, and darling?"
You turned and saw him grinning at you.
"Don't think I'm done with you,"
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You were definitely leaving now, you had to. You couldn't stand another moment in New Orleans. The way Elijah had used you and humiliated you. You couldn't handle it, you had to get away. You needed to be as far away from him as possible.
But Marcel insisted that you come to a party he was hosting, it was a goodbye celebration for you. And you didn't want to let him down, he was one of the few friends you had.
You were packing your things, planning on leaving immediately after the party, when you heard a knock on your door.
You opened it to find a large box, wrapped in beautiful silver paper and tied with a blue ribbon. There was a card attached to it, and you picked it up, curious to know who it was from.
Wear this. I will be picking you up at 8 – E
You groaned, not wanting to see him. You had been doing your best to avoid him, and this was not helping.
The dress he had sent over was gorgeous, it was black and long, and the fabric was silky. The straps were thin and delicate, and the cut was low, and it was sexy, but not revealing. It was an expensive designer brand that was impossible to get, and the fact that he had somehow just had one that was your size pissed you off.
He was so smug and cocky, and the worst part was, he had great taste, and the dress was perfect. You didn't want to like anything about him, he was even good at being infuriating.
At exactly eight a car arrived to pick you up, and Elijah was in the backseat, waiting. He was dressed impeccably, and his eyes roamed over you, a smirk forming on his lips.
"You look stunning," he said, as you sat down, and the driver pulled away. "It's nice to see you in fine clothing."
You rolled your eyes, ignoring the compliment, and staring out the window. His hand went to your thigh, pushing up the dress a little to reveal the top of the stockings you were wearing.
"Is this for me? How thoughtful."
You swatted his hand away, giving him a glare. "I don't dress for any man. I dress for myself,"
"Of course, I would expect nothing less from a strong independent woman," he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms, refusing to engage with him. He leaned over, his lips brushing your ear, and his fingers sliding over your thigh. "You do lots of other things for a man though, don't you?"
You bit your lip, the memory of being on your knees for him, and how good it felt to have him fuck your mouth, flooded your mind. You kept your composure, not wanting to give him the satisfaction.
"No," you said, glancing at him.
He chuckled and put his arm around you, his fingers dancing along your bare shoulders. You wanted to push him away, but the heat of his body was nice, and you didn't hate the way his touch made you feel.
"We shall see about that."
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When you arrived at Marcel's party, you were greeted with cheers, the local vampires loved any excuse to celebrate.
Marcel gave you a hug and poured you a drink, "I'm going to miss having you around, but I understand."
You gave him a smile and took a sip of your drink. "I can never stay in one place for long,"
"I know, and that's what I admire about you," he said, before turning to a vampire who had come to talk to him.
You were standing alone, looking around at the crowd of people. Trying to avoid Elijah, but also keeping an eye out for him.
"Having a good time?"
His voice made you jump and you turned to find him standing behind you, a glass of whiskey in his hand.
"It's alright," you shrugged, trying to act cool, and not like you had just been caught looking for him.
"You seem lonely," he said, leaning closer.
"I'm fine, thank you," you said, taking a step back, but his hand reached out, grabbing your arm, and pulling you against him.
"You keep lying, why is that?" He whispered, his breath warm on your ear.
You shook your head, your heart racing. You could feel his body pressed against yours, and his lips ghosting over your skin.
"Is it because you're attracted to me?" He asked, his tongue darting out and licking the shell of your ear.
"No," you said, but your voice was unsteady, and your breath caught.
"Oh, so you just suck any man's cock then? That's an interesting hobby."
You tried to move away, but his grip tightened, and he turned you to face him. His expression was teasing, but his eyes were dark and intense.
"I apologize, I'm not usually so crude. It's just that seeing you in this dress..," he trailed off, his eyes roaming over your curves, his voice thick with lust.
You blushed, your skin burning, and your pussy getting wet. He was so close, his hands sliding down your body, his touch setting your nerves alight.
"I don't like you," you said, but it sounded weak, and he grinned.
"I know," he murmured, his fingers finding their way under the hem of your dress, dancing along the bare skin above your stockings.
"So why are you letting me touch you?" He asked, his lips brushing against yours.
"Because you are irritatingly fucking hot," you admitted, your body melting into his, his closeness clouding your senses.
"Ah, and there is that honesty I have been searching for," he smirked, his hands gripping your ass.
"Shut up," you said, your eyes locked on his. "Why must you be so arrogant?"
"It's not arrogance, it's confidence. You should try it sometime."
He was smiling now, his eyes twinkling. He had truly pissed you off with his boundless ego and you were done with him. You gave him a little push and then stormed out the exit. Marcel would have to understand, you just had to leave this stupid city, right now.
Elijah followed you, grabbing your wrist, and pulling you into a side room, away from the noise and bustle of the party.
"Have I upset you?" He grinned, pressing you against the wall.
"Yes," you seethed, your jaw clenched, and your blood boiling. You pushed hard on his chest, but he didn't budge, just looked down at your hands with an amused expression.
"What can I do to make it better?" He asked, pressing his palms into the wall on both sides of your head.
"Fuck off."
His grin widened, and he leaned in, his nose nuzzling against yours.
"No," he said, his lips brushing over yours. "I don't think I will,"
Your eyes closed as his mouth captured yours. The kiss was soft and sweet, his lips moving slowly, exploring yours. It was intoxicating, his taste and scent overwhelming. You felt yourself giving in once again, kissing him back, your hands clutching his shirt, pulling him closer.
He hummed, pleased, and his hand slipped behind your head, angling your mouth for deeper access. He was such a control freak, and it only turned you on more.
"You like me," he stated between kisses, his hips rocking forward, his cock hard and straining against his pants.
"No I don't ," you lied, trying to ignore how good his body felt against yours, his lips trailing down your neck.
"And yet, here you are," he smirked, his fangs scraping along the skin, "ready and willing."
You moaned, tilting your head to the side, and allowing him better access. He ran his fangs along your pulse point, nipping at the skin.
"Tell me you don't want me, and I'll stop," he whispered, his hands pulling the straps of your dress down, his mouth trailing kisses along your collarbone and down to the swell of your breasts.
"I don't," you moaned, even though you knew it wasn't true. You wanted him, desperately.
"Naughty little liar," he said in a teasing tone, his hands squeezing your breasts, and his thumbs rubbing over the hard peaks of your nipples. He was getting you so worked up, it was so infuriating and so arousing.
He suddenly stopped touching you, moving back and leaning against the wall across from you, acting like nothing happened, his hands clasped in front of him.
You looked at him, confused and turned on.
"What the fuck?"
"Tell me you want me," he said, his expression smug.
"I hate you," you replied, frustrated, scowling at him and trying to fix your dress.
"That's not an answer."
"I'm not going to beg for it," you snapped, annoyed and desperate. You hated that he had this effect on you. You wanted him so bad, but he was making you work for it, and the game was getting old. But there was a part of you that liked it, the way he was challenging you, the power play, it was hot. But he was pushing his luck. 
"I’m just going to go find someone else," you said, trying to sound cool and disinterested, but failing miserably. You were too flustered, your skin flushed, and your breath short. 
He laughed, shaking his head and holding out his hand, gesturing for you to take it. "I don't think so," he said, a smirk playing on his lips, "come here."
You looked at him, hesitating, but your desire won out, and you placed your hand in his.
He smirked, his fingers interlacing with yours, and he guided you upstairs. His pace was slow, leisurely, and it was maddening.
"I thought you lived at the compound?" You asked, following him down a hallway.
"I have multiple residences," he said, unlocking a door and pushing it open.
You rolled your eyes, of course he did, he was so fucking extra.
"After you," he said, his eyes shining with amusement.
"How chivalrous," you muttered, stepping inside.
His loft was elegantly decorated, with a large four poster bed, and expensive art on the walls. It was so very him, but you kinda liked it.  His taste was refined, and the space was masculine and sexy. You could already picture how the night was going to go, him fucking you on the large bed, the curtains drawn, and his fangs in your neck. Your pussy clenched at the thought, and you bit your lip. This man had you all twisted up, and he had barely even touched you.
His hands found your waist, his fingers digging into your flesh, and his lips brushed the back of your neck. "Do you like what you see?" He murmured, his hands sliding down to squeeze your ass.
"It's alright," you smirked, turning and wrapping your arms around his neck. "The view's pretty good," you teased, looking into his eyes.
"Get on the bed," he murmured, his breath hot on your skin.
"Or what?" You teased.
He didn't say a word, just stared at you, his gaze intense. You felt a rush of adrenaline, and excitement, and you decided to push your luck. He was so cocky, and it was time to put him in his place. You stood your ground, trying to maintain eye contact, but it was impossible, he was so dominating. He gripped your hips, and lifted you up, throwing you onto the bed. You landed with a bounce, and he was on top of you, his hands pinning your wrists above your head.
You giggled and tried to break free, using your forearms to try and push him away. He was such a powerful man, and it made you feel vulnerable, but in a good way. In a way that had your pussy soaking, and your skin burning. He smiled and nipped at your neck, his teeth grazing your skin.
"Behave," he warned, his lips moving down to your chest, and his fingers tugging at the top of your dress.
"Make me," you taunted, knowing it would set him off.
He ripped the dress off of you, making you gasp in surprise, and he sat back, his gaze roaming over your body, clad in nothing but the lingerie and stockings.
"I don't have any other clothes here, asshole!" you whined, annoyed that he had destroyed your beautiful dress.
"I'll buy you more," he said, his voice husky and deep, "so many more,"
He slid down, his tongue running over the swell of your breast, his hand pulling the lace fabric aside. He sucked the nipple into his mouth, and bit down, his fangs sinking into your flesh. You cried out, the pain mixing with the pleasure, and the sound of his low growls vibrating through you.
You squirmed and pulled this hair, trying to get him to stop, but he just bit down harder. Your back arched and you whimpered, tears forming in your eyes.
"Elijah!"
He released you, and licked the wound, sealing the bite, and making the pain subside.
"Are you done being a brat?" He asked, his hands stroking your sides.
"Yes," you panted, still trying to recover from the bite.
"Good," he murmured, his lips trailing down to your stomach.
He pulled at the band of one of your stockings, letting it snap against your thigh. He did the same to the other, humming softly as he did, before finally moving down, and burying his face between your legs.
He was frustratingly good with his tongue, his mouth sucking and licking, his hands spreading your thighs wide. You could feel the pleasure building, and your orgasm fast approaching. Your hands fisted in his hair, and you rolled your hips, trying to ride his face. But he held you still, controlling how much pleasure you received.
He eased two fingers inside you, slowly pumping them as his lips closed around your clit, his tongue swirling over it. You kicked your legs, the sensation was intense, and you were so close, the pressure building in your core.
He curled his fingers and the dam broke, a loud cry tearing from your throat as you came. He continued to work you, prolonging the bliss, and making you tremble.
He stopped and looked up at you. His face was glistening and his pupils were dilated, his eyes dark.
"Just admit that you like me," he teased, kissing your inner thigh.
"Not a chance," you smirked, still catching your breath.
He growled, and flipped you over, yanking your ass up, and spreading your cheeks.
"Then I'll have to make you," he said, his thumb tracing the seam of your asshole. His other hand coming down and spanking you, making you squeal in surprise.
He rubbed the sting, soothing the pain, and then smacked you again, this time a little harder. You gasped, burying your face in the pillows, and your fingers digging into the sheets. He alternated, slapping one cheek, and then the other, the pain becoming more intense each time.
"Elijah!"
He ignored you, his hand coming down on your ass, hard, and you cried out, your body shaking. He kept going, the blows landing faster and faster, and you were sure there were tears running down your face, the pain overwhelming.
He paused, his fingers ghosting over the heated skin.
"I'm sorry, am I being too rough?" He asked, his voice thick with sarcasm.
You glared over your shoulder at him, and he smirked, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
"I thought you were a gentleman," you shot back, annoyed with him.
"I can be," he purred, his finger dipping lower, and tracing the entrance of your pussy, "when I want to,"
You moaned, pushing back against his hand, and his fingers pumped slowly. His other hand went to the back of your neck, pressing your face into the mattress, holding you still.
He added a third finger, stretching you, and making you whimper. He leaned over you, his lips brushing against your ear.
"Just give in," he whispered, his voice husky and low. "It'll be so much easier."
You bit your lip, trying to fight it, but he was too skilled, and your will was fading. You moaned, rolling your hips, and grinding against his hand.
He pushed his thumb into your asshole, making you gasp, and he chuckled, his other fingers curling and hitting your g-spot. The stimulation was overwhelming, and the pleasure was building fast. You could feel yourself getting closer, the tension in your core reaching its peak. He was relentless, his fingers and thumb pumping in and out, the sounds of your wetness filling the room. You were moaning, begging, pleading, the need for release consuming you.
"Tell me," he commanded, suddenly stopping. "Tell me how much you like me." His hand moved from the back of your neck and grabbed a fistful of your hair, yanking your head back, and making you gasp.
"Fine! Fine! I fucking like you, ok? I like you! I like your stupid face, and your stupid hair, and your stupid sexy accent, and your stupid dick!" You snapped, frustrated and desperate. You couldn't take the teasing anymore. "Are you happy now?!"
He chuckled, letting go of your hair, and pushing your head back into the pillow. He leaned down and kissed your ass cheek, his lips brushing against the hot, sore skin, before he moved, flipping you onto your back. He spread your legs, and settled between them, his fingers running along your thighs.
You grabbed the collar of his shirt, pulling him towards you, and kissing him hard, biting his bottom lip. You were tired of waiting, and you needed him. He growled, his hands cupping your face, and his tongue plunging into your mouth. The kiss was passionate and desperate, his body pressed flush against yours.
You unbuttoned his shirt, pushing it off his shoulders, and running your fingers over his muscles, feeling the strength of his body. You then tugged at his belt, taking out his cock, and stroking him, your thumb swirling over the head.
He smiled and groaned as you touched him, his hips thrusting into your hand. You spread your legs wider, but he made no move to enter you, his hand moving between your thighs, and rubbing your clit. You moaned, the sensation too much, and you pulled at his wrist. He was being so fucking frustrating, and you wanted him inside you, now.
"Stop teasing me," you complained, glaring up at him.
"Why? its so much fun," he said, smiling wickedly. "I could watch you squirm for hours." He pushed the tip of his cock against your entrance, circling your clit, but still not penetrating you. 
"Tell me again," he said, "tell me how you like me, how much you want me," his hips rocking, his cock pushing and withdrawing, but never going deep enough to satisfy you.
"You are an arrogant prick, who knows exactly what he does to me." You said, your breathing labored.
He smiled and slowly eased into you, his eyes never leaving yours. You felt him inch his way inside, and you moaned, your head rolling back. He filled you completely, stretching you, and making your body burn with pleasure. It felt incredible, your pussy throbbing around him. He groaned, and nipped at your neck, his fangs gliding against the skin. You clutched at him, your nails scratching his back, as his hips started moving, slowly fucking you. 
You were already on the verge of orgasm, the tension coiling inside you, ready to snap. He felt too good, his cock hitting all the right spots, and his fingers playing with your clit. You were falling apart beneath him, your back arching, and your thighs quivering. You didn't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing how much he affected you, as the waves of ecstasy washed over you, you bit down on your lip, trying to hide just how good he felt.
But it was no use, your body betraying you, your cheeks hot and your walls tightening around him. He smiled and kissed your neck, his tongue swirling over your pulse point.
"See, it's not so hard to give in," he purred, his hips slowly rolling.
"Shut up," you managed to get out, still panting, and your limbs weak.
"Already cumming on my cock, and we haven't even really started," he teased. He began to fuck you in earnest, thrusting hard and deep, his cock hitting your sweet spot with each stroke. 
You gripped his biceps, your nails digging into his skin, and you could feel his muscles flexing under your touch. His cock was so thick, stretching you, you spread your legs wider, wanting him even deeper.
"Look at you, so desperate for me," he smirked, his hands moving to your hips, lifting them and changing the angle.
You moaned, and he chuckled, his lips ghosting over your neck.
"So responsive, and so beautiful. My sweet girl," he whispered, his words washing over you.
"I'm... fuck- not… your girl." you breathed, your chest rising and falling rapidly, your heart pounding in your ears.
"Maybe not yet, but you will be," he said, his voice confident, his eyes locking with yours.
He was so sure of himself, and it only turned you on more.
"You wish, Mikaelson."
He laughed, his breath warm on your skin. He thrust hard, hitting the spot deep inside, and making you cry out.
"I do," he said, his eyes searching yours, "and I always get what I want."
You knew it was true, he was so fucking cocky, and the worst part was, you wanted him to have you.
He leaned back, pulling you up with him, and holding you in his lap, his cock impossibly deep inside. His hands went to your hips, guiding your movements, and his eyes never left yours.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, rocking your hips, and taking him deeper. The way he was looking at you, intense, and possessive, it was doing things to you. You couldn't tear your gaze away, your chest heaving, and your nipples brushing against his chest. You squeezed his cock, trying to make him go harder, faster, but his pace remained steady, firm, his grip on your hips tightening. It was all too much and you buried your face in the crook of his neck, overwhelmed by him, and everything you were feeling for him.
He groaned, and smacked your ass, hard. You whimpered and dug your nails into his shoulders. His hands ran up and down your back, soothing the sting.
"No hiding," he said, his voice firm. "I want to see all of you."
You lifted your head, meeting his eyes, your eyelids heavy, cheeks flushed and your mouth open in a silent moan. 
"That's it," he murmured, his lips capturing yours, his tongue slipping into your mouth. "Show me how much you like me," he teased, nipping at your lower lip.
You placed your hands on his chest, moving your legs to straddle him, and his cock slid deeper. You rocked back and forth, slowly at first, and then increasing the pace.
His expression was serious, his eyes fixed on you, and his hands holding your waist. It was like he was memorizing every inch of your body, and the way you felt, the way you moved. You could see the desire in his eyes, the lust, and something else, something softer.
"I like the way you're looking at me," you murmured, your nails dragging along his chest.
He hummed and grabbed your wrists, pinning them behind your back, his other arm wrapping around your waist, and pulling you flush against him.
"I like the way you feel," he replied, his hips rocking into you.
"I bet you say that to all the girls," you teased, knowing it would get a rise out of him.
"Only the ones I can't stop thinking about."
"Mmm, are there many of those?"
He laughed, shaking his head, and kissing your shoulder.
"None that compare to you."
His words, so unexpectedly sweet, made your heart flutter, and a blush creep onto your cheeks.
"Elijah..." you breathed, and he seemed pleased by your reaction.
His hands went to the small of your back and he pulled you closer, your breasts pressed against his chest. You could feel his heartbeat against yours, your skin warm and slick. The anticipation of what was to come sent a shiver down your spine. You threaded your fingers in his hair, gripping it as his hands went to your ass, guiding you on his cock.
"You don't have to leave, you can stay here with me," he said, his voice low and his eyes locked on yours.
You shook your head, not wanting to give in, not wanting him to know how much he affected you. How much you actually wanted that, wanted him.
"I don't like you that much," you replied, your lips brushing his as you spoke.
He smiled and kissed you again, his hand running down your back. You rolled your hips, grinding against him, your clit rubbing against his pelvis. Your movement picked up, and he moaned into your ear, his grip on your ass tighter. You could feel the pressure rising, the intensity becoming overwhelming. Your body tensed, your orgasm close, and Elijah gripped your hips and slowed you down, wanting to make the moment last.
"Stay?" He whispered, his nose nuzzling yours.
"You are so annoying," you muttered, and his chest rumbled with laughter.
"Is that a yes?"
You nodded, and his lips pressed against yours, his hands lifting you up and down. You moaned into his mouth, and he swallowed the sound. The kiss became messy, both of you chasing the pleasure, the friction and the heat almost unbearable. You broke the kiss, panting, and the coil in your core snapped.
You moaned his name in long, drawn out syllables, your forehead pressed against his. He held you tight, his body tense as your pussy clenched around his cock. He watched you, his breathing heavy, his eyes glazed with desire. His hands traced your spine, lightly grazing the skin, and leaving goosebumps in their wake. You could tell he was fighting the urge to cum, wanting to drag out the moment. You looked at him and gave him a small smile, no more teasing, no more games. You touched his cheek, and kissed him, the kiss soft and sweet. Your breath caught in your throat, the intimacy of the gesture overwhelming. His arms tightened around you, his lips moving against yours, and you knew he was falling too, his control failing him.
He let go of your hips, his fingers clutching your ass. You wrapped your legs around his waist and rode him hard and fast, your clit rubbing against his pubic bone. He groaned into your mouth, his cock throbbing inside of you, and you felt him cum, his warmth flooding your body. You rested your head on his shoulder, catching your breath, and trying to make sense of what just happened. You never imagined that sleeping with Elijah would feel so right, so complete. Your mind kept telling you that this was a bad idea, but the connection between you was too strong to ignore.
He kissed your neck, his lips grazing the skin, and you let your eyes drift closed, succumbing to the warmth and comfort of his arms. He really was too good at this. 
"I meant what I said, about you staying." He murmured, his breath tickling your ear. "I like you, a lot."
He pulled away, brushing a few errant strands from your face, his fingers lingering. His dark eyes held nothing but sincerity and you knew then, in that moment, that despite your resolve not to like him, this wasn't just going to be a one time thing.
"I know," you sighed, your hands stroking his jaw, "you are very persuasive."
He chuckled and kissed you again.
"You'll stay?" He asked, his smile growing.
"I'll stay."
"Good," he hummed, kissing your neck, and nipping at your earlobe. 
His lips captured yours, and he kissed you, the passion and desire still burning. He kissed you until your lips were bruised and swollen, until your heart was pounding, and your skin was flushed.
"I still think you are an asshole," you said, once he'd pulled away.
"And I still think you are a brat," he smirked, his fingers tracing patterns on your back.
You laughed, and rested your head on his shoulder, enjoying the moment, the closeness, the warmth of his arms, and the steady beat of his heart.
You couldn't help but surrender.
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redjademilktea · 9 days
Text
Last night's episode of 4 Sided Dive was absolutely wonderful in terms of the amount of insight and perspective we got. Not only the Crown Keepers interlude, but also for campaign 3's themes as a whole.
Specifically what fascinated me though, was the incredible analogy Aimee drew between the Ruidian culture and colonial influence on indigenous/colonized spaces in real life (around the 1h32m mark for reference). It was amazing question to ask and I'll love Aimee endlessly for it because it touches on am interesting parallel between the discourse surrounding the Exandiran gods and what they thematically can represent to us as an audience.
Before I dive into my thoughts, I want to preface this by saying this is my specific perspective as a queer woman of color and daughter of a refugee. While my year-5-in-a-PhD-program brain may just be over analyzing this too much, what Aimee brought up just deeply resonated with me in a way that I don't really see talked about in discussions around the themes of campaign 3. Additionally, the ideas I'll be talking about borrow heavily from Christine Taitano DeLisle's Placental Politics: CHamoru Women, White Womanhood, and Indigeneity under U.S. Colonialism in Guam (2023). Its an incredible piece on indigenous knowledge production and political action that importantly looks to decenter colonial perspectives and history (and more importantly recenter indigenous histories, knowledge, and perspectives in a way that allows us to dislodge the idea that colonialism is something that is immutable and inevitable.)
To quickly summarize Aimee's point/follow up question, she pointed out that the way Ruidians have engaged with, repurposed, and were resentful towards Exandrian cultures mirrors some of the real life experiences of colonized/marginalized communities in relation to colonialism. It was such a powerful comparison to make because in a lot of ways, the struggle of the Ruidian people over the course of the campaign along with the looming question about the gods and whether or not to save them is (intentional or not) deeply resonant with the idea of colonialism and the ways it is deeply ingrained in the even mundane aspects of our life.
In a lot of ways, the Exandrian pantheon can be seen as a colonial force. One that came in and displaced a preexisting order of things and entrenched itself in the new way of being it established. Ashton and Laudna have repeatedly pointed this out throughout the campaign. There was life and existence before the gods. The gods are merely a different mode of being, not the only and inevitable mode of being. Life, society, and being can and did exist without them.
And its important to recognize that aspect of the gods, because it helps us understand their motivations that much better. Aabria in her description of what Opal saw in the Spider Queen as she tried to take Opal as her champion was poignant. Opal did not see an omniscient, unknowable entity. She saw a woman. A woman who was frustrated, angry, and most importantly frightened. They keep Predathos chained away not to protect life on Exandria nor because they feel a moral obligation to do so. They are doing so because they are afraid. Their mortality is at stake. And, as Aabria keenly pointed out, their pride is as well. Every action, every move is out of self preservation. An attempt to save themselves because Predathos demonstrate that not even the gods are a permanent thing.
You'll find (as Anne Stoler writes about frequently) that colonial systems are much the same. They are vehemently intent on self preservation. Any action they undertake and any narrative they create about themselves is solely done to preserve the way things are currently. And that includes narratives that the way things are currently is somehow inevitable. That things were always coming to this moment. Often, this is done at the expense of framing other modes of being as somehow antithetical to the way things are now. That it needs to be this way. And that this way is right and forever.
To me, its important to recognize these parallels. While Ruidians may engage with, adapt, and innovate off of Exandrian ideas, culture, and art, it is only because - as Aimee aptly phrased it - Exandrian culture as a direct result of the gods actions has "sucked all the air out" everything. What is there to engage with, if not the looming orb in the sky that has shaped every aspect of their existence?
It really brings the campaign-wide question of "should we save the gods?" into new light, at least in my opinion. Because its suddenly not about "saving the gods in a morally righteous act to preserve all life." It becomes a layered and complicated network of issues that makes the answer to that question incredibly difficult to answer. Is preserving the status quo because its how things operate now worth it at the expense of the suffering of others? What would saving the gods and the Ruidians look like? Is it even possible to save both? What changes to how things operate would be a result of that? How would those changes be handled?
I bring this up because there is a tendency in some discourse that I've seen to frame questioning the validity of saving the gods as inherently the "wrong" choice to make. When instead, when you see the cast struggling over the question, its because the answer is not straight forward. The gods are not necessary for life. They never were. They just are necessary for life the way things are now. And the question of what disrupting that means is such a fascinating one to engage with.
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moonstruckme · 8 months
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hi lovely! would you consider writing part 2 for reader that is remus' roommate and sirius, where they are freshly together? if you don't feel like it that's fine, have a good day darling
Thanks for requesting honey! Hope this is alright :)
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5
modern au
Sirius Black x fem!reader ♡ 1k words
When Remus opens the door, he banishes his surprise at finding Sirius there almost as quickly as he knows he’s not here to see him. 
“She’s in her room,” Remus says, stepping aside. 
Sirius grins at him, beelining down the hall. He’d been coming around a lot more often lately, and though Remus would like to be annoyed, it’s hard to deny how sweet the two of you are together. After your first meeting, Sirius had begun showing up every weekend, allegedly to hang out with Remus, though you somehow always ended up coming along. Then he started popping in on weekdays, claiming he forgot something at the apartment or was in the area and “thought I may as well stop by to see the two biggest nerds on campus.” According to you, he started showing up at your cafe a short while after that, acting surprised to see you and like he only vaguely recalled Remus mentioning you worked there (after he’d bribed Remus with chocolates for the intel).
You’d only gone on your first date the week before, and Remus had to meet Sirius nearly twenty minutes away from campus afterward to avoid any possibility of running into you as he gushed about the dress you’d picked out (Remus had seen it before you left; it was adorable), how smart you were (Remus knew), the book you were in the middle of (Remus had lent it to you), and did Remus know this and that and that about you? (he did). Sirius spoke like you were the most fascinating creature on the planet, and Remus wasn’t sure he’d ever seen his friend so happy. 
When he got home, you weren’t much better. It had taken you awhile to build up the courage, a few days of Remus catching you smiling at your phone or staring off to the side of your book with a dreamy glaze over your eyes, but finally you’d asked Remus (trying to be casual, as if he didn’t know better) about Sirius. It had started with questions about what kind of music he preferred, then what he’d been like when they’d been in school together, and soon Remus was telling you everything he could recall from the moment he met Sirius when they were eleven, surprised and a bit endeared by how eager you were for every story. 
The day after that, he’d started getting texts from James asking about the girl that had his best friend so smitten (“Moons, I’m telling you,” James had said, “I keep walking into his room to find him texting with his feet kicking behind him. It’s alarming”). It had begun to feel like all Remus did lately was relay information about you and Sirius to anyone who asked. Frankly, he felt lucky to have a first-row seat to the show, endlessly amused to watch as two of the most self-assured people he knew devolved into giggling fools in the other’s presence. 
Now, he can hear you squeal as Sirius bursts into your room, followed by some scuffling sounds, and then Sirius drags your blanket-wrapped form across the floor and out into the living room by your ankle. You curse and twist about, grinning with the sort of animation Remus hadn’t known you possessed until you’d met Sirius. 
“Alright,” Remus says in his bored, I’m-so-done-with-your-lovebird-shit voice (he’s had plenty of time to practice it in these last few weeks), “unhand my roommate, Sirius.” 
Sirius drops your foot, and you sit up, shaking your head in entirely faked exasperation as you straighten your rumpled hair. 
“Moony, do you know she’s been dodging my calls for days?”
Remus quirks a brow. “I heard you on the phone last night.” 
“Some bullshit about an exam,” Sirius continues as though he hasn’t spoken. “Can you believe it? You know me, I won’t stand for this sort of treatment.”
“I know you’re needy, Black,” you say, standing with the grace of a monarch despite your polka-dot pajamas and the blanket wrapped around your shoulders and going to sit on the couch, “but I can only afford to feed your ego every so often when my strictest professor’s exam is coming up.” 
Remus hums in recognition. “That’s tomorrow morning, isn’t it?”
You nod, brushing a greasy piece of hair behind your ear self-consciously, and Remus watches you sympathetically. He’s not sure how much you’ve let Sirius know, but it’s hard to live in such close proximity to someone and not pick up on their moods. You’ve been horrendously stressed about this exam all week. The coffee maker has been running nearly non-stop, the shower running not at all, and Remus has seen light coming from under your door at all hours of the night. 
“Maybe the two of you should go to a park or something,” he suggests gently. “Enjoy the nice weather, relax for a while.” 
You look anxious at the prospect of abandoning your textbooks for a few hours, but Sirius is assessing you, putting the pieces together of what this week has done to you. “Good idea, Moons,” he says, and Remus doubts he has to fake any of the enthusiasm in his voice. “What do you think, lovely girl, want to go on a little adventure?”
You hesitate, but in the end time with Sirius is too tempting to pass up. “Let me just get dressed.”
“Ugh,” Sirius complains. “If you have to.” 
A few minutes later Remus is watching you both warmly, feeling oddly like someone’s dad, though he’s not sure whose. He can’t help but smile as Sirius fawns over you, telling you how pretty you look and insisting upon tying your shoes for you (“Gorgeous thing like you, doing things for yourself? Don’t be ridiculous, sweetheart. Give me a few weeks, and you won’t remember how to tie your shoes or open your own door.”) before opening the front door gallantly. You’re all coy looks and feigned annoyance at his flirtation, but there’s more color in your complexion than Remus has seen all week, and you lean into Sirius when he wraps an arm around your shoulders. It’s all very sickeningly sweet. 
“Have fun,” Remus says, waving you out the door. “And Pads.”
Sirius looks back, gray eyes practically sparkling. “Yeah?”
“She’s got an exam in the morning. Don’t get her home too late.”
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thatdeadaquarius · 4 months
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GREETINGS! How are you doing? I've been practically gobbling up your posts (there very tasty)
Ok so hear me out- I've seen a couple posts like this but imagine-
The almighty all powerful wise creator isss
✨️A literal child✨️
Thanks for hearing me out! For you ->->❤️
Baby you taking on the world aw
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DAMN SORRY FOR TAKING FOREVER!! i started fics before i answered my askbox :/
Aw i fucking love child reader stuff,
Lots of isekai animes/manhwa/manga do it and i eat that shit up everytime-
I also deeply appreciate when its not done creepily, like being turned 8 again, and having crushes on others who are... yknow, actually 8 yrs old or sm fucked up shit, like even if its 16 yr olds that doesnt make it any better, bc the protag will actually be like,, actually 20?!?!💀 the straights r wild man, i feel like it happens either way too, like its usually a male MC but thats just bc theyre more common tbh, like regardless of gender of protag 🥲
Sun: Child God Reader (you/they/them)
Orbit: Short Headcanons
Stars: Mondstadt ppl bc i don't show them i love them enough
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: none known & Trigger Warnings: none known.
Please comment any I missed. /gen
Klee has recruited converted you to throwing bombs with her.
You are the only leash on that child too and the only thing standing between Jean and full head of gray hair. 💀
Kaeya doesn’t know whether he’s endlessly worried or endlessly amused that the most powerful god is currently a child
if Jean isnt freaking out over ur whereabouts, Diluc is instead, and worst case scenario, Noelle/Lisa/Albedo is in charge of you
and YES someone has to look out for you, bc ur ass will just start making a hot springs spot like ur in ur teapot or smth in dragonspine (Albedo was fascinated it stayed warm despite the weather so he let you make it/enjoy it before asking u to restore natural order lol)
(Albedo has definitely asked to study you and, unfortunately for Jean, asked u to demonstrate several powers u have)
You do work as a lucky charm for Bennett tho so he does babysit u sometimes
it mostly consists of Fischl, Benny, and Razor “adventuring” by trying to do smth like who can jump on the Anemo slimes and ride them around longest
(the answer is you btw, u managed to get a small fleet of them to bus you around, the teens were simultaneously terrified running around below u to catch you and also amazed)
Noelle is so happy making toddler you all the pancakes you can eat, Sucrose had to stop her from going overboard and not just listening completely to kids when it comes to food
She is now very concerned with making you a balanced diet, tho she will still make u an ungodly tall stack of pancakes every now and then <3
They kind of all equally provide for you, obv ur their god, and ur a literal cutie patootie child, they cant just leave you
(also u might like move a mountain or change the weather or smth if they don't watch you so most are a little paranoid of that too)
Lisa gets u all kinds of cute outfits, still stuff you'd like, but definitely snuck in some sumeru looking clothing lol
Fischl lends you all kinds of books to read, Bennett shows u all the cool views in the city and outside of it (when Jean lets him get away with taking u that far), and Razor…
Razor brings you to Andrius and the wolf pack for a wolf pack party and gives u all kinds of shiny trinkets he’d collected for you
Diluc/Jean/Noelle/Eula nearly had a heart attack when they found out
Amber lets you have all the piggyback rides you want lol
she even managed with her own crafting powers (and your probably editing the game code or smth) she somehow makes a reinforced glider with a small harness on the back for you to glide with her
(Venti has definitely helped for some fun flights by boosting the winds for you two)
SPEAKING OF BARBATOS
ur absolutely spoiled rotten by him (and Dvalin, and Andrius, and the wind sprites)
if this god had money he’d spend it on wine and you lol
takes u flying all the time, any time, would drop everything to go to Mondstadt wilds and use his archon form wings to take you wherever you wanna go
tries to bring u to Angel’s Share but Diluc nearly hits him on the head with a wine bottle and brings you back home after kicking Venti out and giving you grape juice (yes you get all you want, within a healthy amount)
anyway the most important part abt you being a god and child is that you can now fulfill your childhood dreams of riding a dragon whenever you want
(one way to quickly get Mondstadt citizens to trust Dvalin again was just constantly seeing him flying overhead, occasionally seeing a small child on his back also helped lol)
(neither you nor Venti tell Jean you ride Dvalin and keep it an active secret from her.)
srry i took so long! i hope u liked my hot mess of writing (i think its even sloppier than usual bc of all the fic writing full sentences lately)
and if not, I'm sorrryyy 😭😭
I'm focusing on getting thru a haul of asks before getting around to posting that Eldritch AU Part 2 if anyone reads this :)
hope u guys are have a great weekend, thanks for all the birthday wishes!! :D
Safe Travels Anon,
💀♒
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(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")
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dulcewrites · 2 years
Text
Fool Me Once (pt 2)
Pairing: Aemond targaryen x reader (wc: 3.6k)
Summary: Despite learning about Aemond cheating on you, life has never been sweeter. Who knew being so bad could be so good.
Warnings: manipulation, mentions/allusions to pregnancy issues, mentions of self harm
A/N: first, I just have to say thank you for the response to part 1. I truly had no idea it would get the reception it would. Thank you to everyone who followed me as well. I hope I can continue to produce stuff y’all like. I’m hoping to write more hotd stuff, Aemond and non Aemond related. I plan on taking a small hiatus but will be back around thanksgiving weekend. I will be writing on/off during that time but just away for a trip/the holiday. If you have any hotd requests my inbox is always open. I would try to get them out either before my hiatus next week (11/16) or after it ends (11/26). I’m pretty open to writing any character, though I will warn you I’m way more fascinated by the greens so they just come easier to me. Anyway please reblog, like, and follow if you read anything you enjoy 🫶🏽🫶🏽. And some housekeeping: in this Aegon is not r*pist who enjoys watching children fight (the hotd are truly…. not right for the cartoonishly evil way they wrote Aegon). He’s just petty and neglected. Also the timing of this is different from the books bc Aemond meets Alys pre dance.
Fmo masterlist
Blog Masterlist
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A bastard Strong. The irony is not lost on you. Your straight-laced husband fucking someone who is the complete opposite you. Older, no kids, no title, and no duty to uphold. At this point, it doesn’t hurt anymore. Instead, it makes your blood boil in the most delicious way. Aemond’s betrayal made you realize how you’ve been going through the motions; endlessly sleepwalking, hoping one day Aemond would come around. It woke you up to how much he’s taken advantage of you. He sees your kindness, and aversion to standing out as a weakness. Something he can manipulate and twist like one of his daggers.
The both of you must have forgetten where you came from. A rich, well respected house. The only daughter of smart, albeit conniving, family that knows how to get what they want. Your family didn’t have dragons or absurd ideas of exceptionalism to help you gain power. You’ve learned that inflated egos and prideful indulges can cloud Targaryen judgment. A trait you hope skips your children.
Shame on you for thinking Aemond would be different. Shame on him for the carefully curated facade.
All you do after Larys Strong comes to you the first time is think. You can’t remember the last time you’ve had this many options in front of you. Your mother’s words about patience run through your head. Keeping your wits is key. Play your hand too quickly, and you lose all leverage. You have Daella and the babe in your belly to think about. You stood pat in the beginning; Lord Strong simply relaying messages to you. You make sure Alys gets the letter Aemond wrote, and the ones after that. Lord Larys makes sure you get the details of each letter exchanged.
When the days grew lonely, and your body aches because of the babe in your stomach, you think about the letters. The declarations of love and recounts of lust filled meetups simmer in your head, but it’s the mentions of you that makes the anger sizzle and crackle. It makes the guilt you feel wash away.
You question if the rumor is true. That his Alys is a witch. Does her magic allow her to see the way Helaena can? Fuzzy premonitions and dreams that only make sense after they happen; a gift and a curse. A part of you wishes it to be true. You hope while your stomach stirs with untold truths, hers stirs with regret. Maybe the pain that runs through you leaves an unfamiliar taste in her mouth. That she can’t quite put her finger on it, but she feels you.
You wonder if when Aemond prays, he asks the Father to protect him… to protect her. The same way when you pray, you ask the Warrior to help you find the courage to destroy him.
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It started with a bruise. A bruise that you don’t even remember how you got. Maybe one of those things you just wake up with. But it’s there, on the inside part of your left arm. It’s starting to fade but an otherwise noticeable bruise that stands out when you wear something with shorter sleeves.
The idea doesn’t come to you till you see the curiosity in Alicent’s eyes when you absentmindedly rub the bruise while asking if she’s seen Aemond. It’s only you two in the walkway; an unusually quiet day at the Red Keep. Her eyes go from it to the far away look in your eyes. It makes her tilt her head in thought.
“No dear, I haven’t,” her eyes go back to the scratch. “Are you doing alright? I know for some, the second babe can be even harder than the first.”
You look down at your arm, and something just clicks.
“I’m fine,” you start, then you make your voice tremble a bit. “I will be fine. I think I’m just tired.”
You give her a strained smile, and she returns one that tells you she doesn’t believe you. You can feel her big brown eyes burning into your back when you walk past her towards your chambers. There could be two thoughts in her head: you did this yourself or someone else did it to you. Either way, her son’s sweet pregnant lady wife is not doing well, and her son is nowhere to be found. Queen Alicent is one of the smartest, if not the smartest, person you know. She sees the change in her son; the change in the dynamic between Aemond and you.
It hits you. It would be too easy to physically harm Aemond. Though the idea of taking the blade that hangs from his hips and putting it to his throat has crossed your mind more times than you’re proud of. It would be too easy to get Larys to kill Alys. You don’t want to give Aemond the satisfaction of having his whore’s blood on your hands.
Where’s the fun in killing when your rage could be channeled into something more… methodical.
Under all that false bravado is the little boy who got picked on for not having a dragon. To break the man means bringing out that little boy. A truly broken man can’t love anyone. Isolation, and self hatred. What a gorgeous combination for your dear husband.
If this is going to work you need to up the ante.
So, you write. If Aemond and Alys can document their love, you can document your pain. You sent your lady in waiting out to get a blank book from one of the maesters. The color dyed cow skin feels smooth under your hands. There needs to be a slow build. Each day you grow closer and closer to shattering. Whoever reads it needs to know Aemond brought you to this place. He is the villain in the story of the poor, innocent wife that did nothing but carry his children and try to love him.
It will read like a diary, but to you it is a creation. A mixture of truth and imagination. A manifestation of pent up feelings. Purging and revenge all rolled up into one. You make sure to mention how terrified you are for your safety, and for you children’s safety. How an angry or disenchanted Aemond is nothing to toy with, especially if he has a bastard witch on his side. How maybe life would be better for Aemond if you just weren’t around.
But this fading bruise isn’t enough. Neither is just having a diary that will be discovered in due time. A deep cut, a dark bruise, half hazardously placed hand prints.. now that could work.
There’s something cathartic about the pain you feel when the dagger slices through your skin. The blood is so red and warm. It smears so smoothly on the page. Blood on your dress, cloth pressed to the wound, and wandering the halls is how Ser Criston finds you. You notice the worried, confused look in his eyes when you stutter out an ‘I don’t know’ when he asks what happened.
As the maester tends to your wound, you notice how Alicent and Criston stand in the corner of Alicent’s quarters. They occasionally glance at you while they whisper to each other. You recognize the familiar crinkle she gets in her forehead when she’s upset. All her children do it too.
“Sweetling, we both think it might be a good idea to give you your own knight of the kingsguard,” she sits next you. “Just to help you and… keep an eye on you during this vulnerable time.”
You blink. Not one mention of her son. But it’s clear to see how Ser Criston is with his queen. Submissive, and utterly devoted. Having someone like that is an asset. So, you smile weakly and nod. The more people who see you in this way, the better.
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Ser Quinton Throne was quiet in the beginning. As if he was scared to be in your space. A far cry from the rambunctious knight his brother, Rickard, is. Moving past the initial shyness, he is attentive and even indulges Daella’s fascination with him. Despite you telling her not to, she would always run up to him, tugging on his white cloak to get his attention. She likes having someone around just as much as you.
The distance between Aemond and you had started to carry over into his relationship with Daella. Kids are more intuitive than adults give them credit for. Your throat felt tight when you daughter finally asks where father goes. You lie; it comes easy to you, easier than you thought it would. It makes you think if this is how easy it is for Aemond to lie to you. Or for everyone to not gloss over the clear problems in your life.
You would lying if you said it wasn’t nice having a man around, even if it was his job. It was Aemond’s job to do right by you, and he couldn’t do that. A man carrying out his orders with a warm smile was welcomed. The comfort of having someone who sweared his allegiances to you, and only you, and intended on keeping them.
You look from your embroidery loop to see Daella and Ser Quinton sword fighting with wooden swords. It’s an uncharacteristically sunny day. Perfect to get much needed fresh air, and apparently going to battle.
“She’s gotten quite good.”
Like a storm rolling in to ruin a sunny day, your husband’s tone is ever cold and distant. You hate the uncomfortable energy that radiates when he sits next to you.
“Yes, she has,” you stare at the Lysene lilac flower starting to come to life on your loop. “He’s good with her as well.”
You know he won’t like you saying that. He hates Quinton being around, and he especially hates how Daella taken a liking to him. Aemond scoffs and mumbles something under his breath you can’t make out.
“It’s just lovely having real protector around,” you continue to push your luck. “Someone so attentive and… strong.“
You look at with his a sickening sweet smile. He opens his mouth to say something, a complaint or rude comment since those seem to be the only reasons he talks to you, but he is interrupted by Daella yelling out for him.
“We’ll talk about this later,” he mutters to you, getting up.
“Oh you’ll actually be here long enough for that?”
The words slip out your mouth and it makes him turn to glare at you. It reminds you of the gossip you heard about him when you first arrived at court. How cold the king’s second son can be. It should’ve been a warning to you.
Quinton takes it as his cue to leave them be; you know he can sense how much Aemond doesn’t appreciate his presence. You watch as Daella clings to her father. As selfish as it sounds, you patiently wait for the day she too realizes he can’t be depended on.
“My mother used to make me embroider,” your knight’s voice breaks you out of looking on. “Something about being dangerous with a needle is just as great as being dangerous with a sword.”
You take a good look at him. If Aemond is the moon - ethereal, mysterious, and always changing, then Quinton is the sun. Bright, forward facing, and shines brighter with time. His choppy black hair, beard, and warm standing in contrast to your husband’s Targaryen features.
“Sounds like a smart woman,” you smile as he sits next to you.
His eyes linger on your embroidery work before traveling to you right arm. The blade wound was just starting to scab and scar over. His first day on duty was marked by seeing your husband give a long lecture on safety and ‘using your brain’ after Aemond saw your wound. The blade cut wasn’t under pure circumstances, but the look of resentment on your face was real. He saw that. He’s never asked what really happened to your arm.
“How are you my lady,” he whispers. You told him he can address you by your name, but he still insist on the formal names especially around others. “Is the babe giving you trouble.”
Ser Quinton, Helaena, and Alicent are the only people that seem to care about your well being, on top of the babe’s. Aemond concern went making sure the babe was fine to just not asking all together. It’s better that way, you think. You don’t think you’d be able to take fake concern about your little ‘mistake’.
“My bladder is being pushed on, I’m finding clumps of my hair on my pillow, and Maester Oliver told me this baby will weigh more than Daella did,” you reply lightly. “But other than that I’m doing fine.”
This pregnancy had knocked you on your ass. You’re sure the stress and thoughts that consume you don’t help. You know how it feels to come into a fracture family; it makes you feel awful for the babe in your stomach. Your parents tried hard, frankly too hard, to pretend things were good between them. Trying to prove their union was more than a duty for their houses. Till this day, you don’t know what’s worse: knowing they didn’t share that love or the years you watched them fake everything. They had ambitions, and to carry them out there needed to be an appearance of an united front. You took your father’s lead, knowing he always tried to have your best interest. The relationship you have with your mother often ebbing and flowing, especially since your marriage.
When you ravened your mother about your pregnancy troubles, she tells you that this is your responsibility to your husband. Harsh and utterly true. You don’t know if your father ever had indiscretions like Aemond, but you know she’d never plot the way you do. Her calculating nature showing up in different ways. Instead of going after him, she chose to focus on elevating you.
Her and Queen Alicent remind you of each other. Devoted to a fault. A victim who had no other choice but to fall in line.You pray for the both of them. Pray that they find peace with the sacrifices they’ve made. Pray that you never get that far. A shell of yourself. Duty, responsibility, cleaning up others’ messes - what a dull way to live.
“Once he’s out, I’m sure it will all be worth it,” says Ser Quinton, voice not wavering.
He’s trying to be kind, mentioning the working theory in the castle that you’re having a boy. You try to smile at the thought. It’s hard to believe that. Plan or not, you still have to know the truth about the father of your children. There is hole left in your heart about that. Him disrespecting you is one thing, but his words pertaining to your unborn child is another. A sudden spurt of anger rushes over you thinking about everything. It makes you stand abruptly.
“I’m feeling tired,” you watch as Daella pretend to stab her father with her sword. Her giggles ringing out when he reaches to pick her up. The dichotomy of Aemond Targaryen will always fascinate you as much as it terrifies you. How he manages to smile in her face, and lie to yours is quite a sight to watch. “I’ll send Margret out to get Daella.”
Waiting for the perfect moment is not going to work. There no time like the present.
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The stiff upper lip of this family is something you noticed the moment you stepped into their presence. It’s seeped into the way they gatekeep a dying Viserys. Alicent is cold and collected in the most beautiful way. A sharp glittering icicle. A pretty rose littered with thorns to keep you admiring from a distance. Even Helaena, who you consider a friend, keeps certain things close to the chest. It’s better to keep the full truth away from her.
But there’s Aegon.
Pitiful, and lonely Prince Aegon. A drunk with a bad attitude. But he’s also the most painfully self-aware person you know. There will be times that you and him exchange looks, as you are in on the joke. That everything is a farce. One day someone will just come up and say it’s all been a bad dream. You think it’s the reason why he frustrates Aemond so much. The teasing on top of him never taking the Targaryen name seriously. Aegon spends his days trying to drink and fuck his way out of thinking about his life. Stuck in a royal cuckold. The first born son of a king with nothing to show for it.
He’s messy, nosy, and so openly brash. He’s your missing chess piece. The perfect pawn.
You leave the diary around places in the castle you know he will be. It’s not until you conveniently leave it in the play room where all Daella, Jaehaera, and Jaehaerys all frequent that you know he’s taken the bait. His lilac eyes seem to follow you whenever you two are in the same room. It takes days for him to confront you; book in hand and wry look on his face.
“Is it true? Everything you wrote?”
You stroke your belly while looking at him, a small smile on your face.
“Does it matter that if it is,” you tilt your head, and his eyes glitter with something you’re not used to seeing.
He mirrors your head tilt with a full blown smile on his face this time. It’s like a bright light after weeks of darkness. A person who also sees through the bullshit that enraptures once you call yourself a Targaryen.
“I greatly underestimated you my good sister,” he whispers. You know he’s thinking about his own words. ‘Pretty but horribly dull’.
“That’s fine,” you motion to the seat next to you. “You can make it up to me.”
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Queen Alicent stands facing the fire. Aegon, Helaena, and Ser Quinton off to the side. All of them standing across from where you sit. Aegon gives you a knowing look while Quinton’s eyes are filled with pity and anger. Pity for his princess, anger towards his prince. Helaena looks like she wants to say something.
“I… do not know what to say,” her voice is strained with pain. You know this hurts for her. The image of the perfect son being destroyed. The pedestal she put him on crumbling before him.
You’ve gotten better at crying after Aegon told you tears will be necessary to sell it. It’s an automatic response now. The perfectly timed emotion that breaks like flood gates when Alicent holds out the diary. You say you’re embarrassed. That you never meant for anyone to read it, especially not anyone in the family. Aegon gets to be the concerned good brother. He rubbed your back, while his mother called for Helaena. She needed to know who else knew about this.
“I can say what everyone is thinking,” Aegon pipes up. “He’s a fucking cunt.”
“Aegon.”
His mother turns to glare at him, but it doesn’t deter him.
“Walking around with that self righteousness just to fuck a Strong,” he scoffs. “Calling his child a mistake?”
The words makes Alicent sigh, and squeeze her eyes shut. Helaena continues to play with her fingers with a quizzical look in her eye. If Aegon of all people can judge, the actions must be bad.
“This all my fault,” you decide to take it up a notch. Your breath catches. “I must’ve done something to deserve this.”
“Oh my sweet girl,” Alicent walks over and sits next to you, pulling you into her chest. “None of this is your fault.
“I just don’t know what I did to deserve this,” you continue. That part is true; what the seven hells did you do to deserve this marriage? “This, and the baby, and missing my family. I’m just so unhappy here.”
Alicent strokes your hair. You can feel her heart thumping in her chest. You can tell she’s upset and scared. Scared for what your unhappiness means. You’re a risk now.
“Maybe… my father can come and visit. He hasn’t been here since Daella was born.”
After you got married, your parents left court to tend to your house. They felt their work was done. That the marriage was as far as their political ambitions can go. They visit from time to time to see their granddaughter but normally you’re the one who has to make the trip.
“Of course,” you can see the wheels turning in her head. “I’m sure the Hand would love to pick his brain on some things. Your father has always been so kind and helpful”
Queen Alicent is as predictable as she is smart. Your dad thought your marriage would help him get a seat in the small council. When no offer came, his ego was bruised. If your marriage couldn’t, maybe a desperate Alicent can. The idea of sending a raven about the news makes you have to bite back a smile. An ally in an castle full of strangers.
“I’ll speak to Aemond about this,” she nods to herself. “You don’t need to be worrying about this in your condition.”
The disappointment is clear in smooth voice. Before you can reply with a thank you, Helaena finally piped up.
“A baby’s green eyes spurs brighter skies.”
She mutters it before looks at you curious. You look down at your swollen belly, feeling confused. Neither Aemond or you have green eyes. You try to push the sinking feeling out of your stomach. Even Aegon, who normally ignores Helaena’s cryptic language, has perked up a little.
You take a look at Ser Quinton… his eyes as green as spring grass.
Ok this is my first one doing a tag list, so I’m sorry for those I’ve missed. It only let me do 50??? Idk it’s it’s different on desktop or I’m doing something wrong. Hopefully I can find a more conducive way for this. I also only tagged people who specifically asked: @afro-hispwriter @crispmarshmallow @unabashedlyswimmingtimemachine @its-sam-allgood @lol-im-done @grey-water-colors @sassysaxsolo @justsumstufff @lilithskywalker @dc-marvel-girl96 @bekky06 @claudie-080102 @cloudroomblog @shelbythequeen @crazylokonugget @solacestyles @instantpeachpeace @katyadenauer @nsainmoonchild @deeeeexx @iwanttohitmyself @rosa-berberifolia @noisyinfluencerstrawberry @princessmiaelicia @bregarc @castellomargot @thesadvampire @chaosmagiq @icarusignite @happinessinthebeing @flavorofsalt @wishfulwithwine @slut-for-eddie-munson @rosaryos @mistalli @inana-mm @winxschester @papery-maniac @nolongereviliwantlove @fultimefangirl @missusnora @skinmittensgoblin @duckworthbean @b00kdiary @chiyausu @alexandra-001 @tachibubu @juneisreading @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @verycollectivecreator
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pastanest · 9 months
Text
Spencer Reid x she/her!reader
A/N: guess who’s back with another shrimp reid fic. that’s right, you guessed it, Im ovulating
gif from an unnamed source on google so if it’s yours please let me know and I’ll credit!! ♡
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Mean It
The bond you have formed with the resident genius of the BAU is one that you treasure. Every morning, you are most excited to practically skip into the office with the brightest smile on your face, just for him. The wonder, the magic that is Doctor Spencer Reid, and you are lucky enough to call him your closest friend.
He is endlessly fascinating to you. Unlike the rest of the team, you have never once cut one of his rambles short, you have listened to each and every one in its entirety, with stars in your eyes.
The two of you talk about anything and everything, from the most mundane smalltalk to the deepest philosophical debates, and you enjoy every moment spent in Spencer’s company.
However, as you perch on Spencer’s desk in what has become a morning tradition, the look on your face as you glance around the office makes your dear friend’s heart sink, because he knows who you are looking for.
And right on cue, Derek Morgan strolls into the office, yelling an overly enthusiastic question that is - much to Spencer’s dismay - ritualistic, too.
“WHERE’S MY PRETTY GIRL?”
The beaming smile on your face as you hop off of Spencer’s desk and run into Derek’s open arms is worse than a bullet wound, which Spencer knows to be true without any actual proof.
He watches on, wondering if his skin is turning green with jealousy, as Derek picks you up and spins you around, the two of you laughing like it’s the funniest thing in the world. What’s so funny about that? Spencer thinks bitterly, frowning at his computer and forcing himself to shift his focus, though his subconscious continues to grumble. If he was ever allowed the privilege of holding you like that, the last thing he’d do is laugh about it.
Thankfully, the morning event is over as quickly as it began, and you skip back over to Spencer with a smile that’s different to the one you had for Derek. What shade of green is Spencer now?
“Sorry about that, Spence, gotta reach my daily hug quota!” You chime.
Spencer’s stomach drops. He wants so badly to offer his own services, to perhaps suggest some variety in who is allowed to meet your daily-hug-quota and enquire whether you’d consider his application, whether he meets your criteria. But, in what can only be described as the worst preconceived notion in human history, Spencer does not like physical contact in the majority of circumstances, as you have well known since the day you met him and he proposed a kiss would hold less germs than a handshake, which made you blush in a way his eidetic memory has never let him forget. He wishes, more than anything, he could travel back in time to that very day, to add a clause to the contract he’d bound himself to, some fine-print that said ‘physical contact from and with (Y/N) is the only exception to every typical circumstantial preference for no physical contact’. Alas, Spencer Reid had unintentionally doomed himself.
Today is a rarity, in which the team have spent the day confined to the BAU building, filing case reports and talking amongst themselves. You speak to Spencer most of all, because on the occasion anyone else speaks to him, he finds he is too distracted by you to fully focus his efforts on the conversation.
As per usual, you wait at the elevator doors for Spencer, never walking out of the office without him in an unspoken gesture of your sweet appreciation for his company.
“Oh, Spence, did you want to have a Doctor Who sleepover tonight?” You suggest suddenly, causing Spencer’s eyes to widen and his heart to skip simultaneously.
“Y-Yes! Of course!” He blurts out, perhaps a little too quickly. Perhaps, he should have paused for a beat, giving you the impression he had been able to form a degree of a coherent thought before he answered you.
Instead, Spencer spends the elevator ride down to the ground floor glancing at you with a dazed look in his eyes, like you are the first star he’s ever seen and he’s too shy to look at you for too long. Why would he be shy in the presence of a star? Stars are out of his reach, beyond the realm of his capability to hold. That metaphor had been far more applicable than he’d realized.
The drive to your house is spent in accordance with your typical pre-sleepover routine; Spencer says he doesn’t mind what music you play, and you select one of your many playlists at random, singing and dancing in such a theatrical way in the passenger seat of Spencer’s car that he truly wonders if he didn’t have an IQ of 187, would he be able to split his focus between adoring you and concentrating on the road?
In what feels like no time at all, you and Spencer are sitting on your sofa with a blanket each and a bowl of popcorn between you that Spencer finds himself internally cursing with every unkind word he knows, as he does each and every time that pathetic plastic bowl forms an impassable barrier between him and you. Occasionally, his fingers are lucky enough to brush yours if you happen to reach for popcorn at the same time. You always chuckle like it’s a coincidence, never quite catching onto the way in which Spencer studies your movements in his peripheral vision to calculate, down to a fine science, how long it takes you to finish one handful of popcorn before you’ll reach for another, and he can just so happen to plan his movements accordingly. All for a brush of your fingertips. In truth, Spencer would run through a burning building just for the chance to hold your hand, even if it wasn’t promised. The chance, that’s all he needs.
In the midst of what is otherwise a very traditional evening shared between the two of you, Spencer feels different. The more he thinks about how this evening could play out if Derek Morgan were in his place, the more Spencer wonders if his eyes are playing tricks on him or if the skin of his hands is turning green with jealousy. Would the bowl of popcorn be in the same place? Would it be on your lap, or Derek’s, allowing the two of you to sit closer, considering you already showcase just how comfortable you are together? Or would it be on the coffee table, leaving no obstruction between you and Derek at all? Would his arm be around you, and would your arm be around him in return? Would you be telling Derek the pieces of movie trivia that Spencer had been the one to tell you, when you watched a movie with Derek that you had previously seen with Spencer? Do you wish Derek was here with you instead? ‘Nauseous’ is too small a word and does not contain enough profanities.
“I’m not gonna get through all this popcorn on my own, Spence.” You chuckle quietly, having noticed that your company hasn’t reached for popcorn in some time due to how cold your hand feels, having not flushed at the sensation of his fingertips in too long.
“Sorry, not hungry.” Spencer murmurs.
The sadness in his voice sets off alarm bells in your head immediately, and you pause the movie, discarding the bowl of popcorn that Spencer’s scowl follows all the way to the coffee table, while you turn to face him on your couch.
“Spence, what’s the matter? Do you feel sick?” You ask gently.
Yes, actually, viscerally.
“Nothing, I’m-“
You shake your head, the only time you’ll ever cut him off is when he tries to deflect. “Don’t. I can see something’s wrong, and if you don’t want to tell me, that’s okay, but can you please tell me what I can do to help?”
Of course, Spencer’s feelings for you have a solid foundation in the perceptive and attentive person that you are, forever seeing right through him.
“Do you…Do you ever have movie nights with Morgan?” He asks timidly, his head hanging in shame, his gaze fixed on his lap.
Spencer’s question completely catches you off guard, and your jaw drops, an amused smile gracing your features in utter bewilderment.
“What? No, Derek’s never even stood on my doorstep, Spence, why do you ask?” You question the motives of his query, and he sighs in defeat.
“I just figured…you’re so comfortable with him, you must want to spend time with him outside of work, too. I guess I just don’t understand why you’d invite me instead. Do you pity me, or something?” Spencer asks in a dejected and small voice.
The cogs in your brain are turning, your expression softening in turn.
“Spencer, I don’t pity you, I invite you because I enjoy spending time with you.” There’s a delicacy to your words, recognising his fragile state.
And Spencer’s foolish, lovesick heart sings from beneath the ruins at your words, at the tiniest spark of hope that is immediately suffocated by his own insecurities.
One word from you has the power to make and break him, all at once.
“But you enjoy Derek more.” Spencer’s voice breaks on the last word he speaks, and he closes his eyes in a pained blink, turning his face away from you completely in an effort to shield himself from the kindness he’ll see in your gaze. “You sit with me every morning while you wait for him, and the second he’s there, you’re gone. The way you smile at him isn’t the same way you smile at me. I understand that you don’t feel the same way about me, but I don’t understand why you’d waste any time on me outside of work, based on that.” Spencer is trying his absolute best to phrase everything he says in his usual objective, matter-of-fact tone, but the hurt in his words is so clear.
“Spencer,” You sigh gently, “Will you look at me, please?”
He shakes his head. “Can’t.”
“Why not?” You ask in the same soft voice that makes his heart ache.
“I’ll forget how much this hurts the moment I look at you.” Spencer mutters.
“Don’t you want to forget?” You question, almost pleading.
Spencer shakes his head. “If I forget, I’ll throw myself back into the same cycle of pining for you, living off of your smiles and glances and the instances where I make you laugh.”
Your heart breaks at his words, and for a few seconds, you don’t say anything. The very moment the idea enters your mind, you reach for Spencer’s hand, holding it gently in both of yours, and immediately, his wide eyes have turned to stare at you.
And your tears. You must have only started crying after you last spoke to him, because if you had been crying in the midst of your reply, Spender wouldn’t have been able to hear anything else.
And just like he predicted, the sight of you makes him forget every ounce of his own pain, his heart breathing a sigh of relief and reaching out for you in pure anguish at the sight of you, in tears.
“Why are you crying?” Spencer asks, his voice barely above a whisper. If it wasn’t for your tears, the way you are holding his hand would render him incapable of forming a single word.
“Because you have no idea that you’re my favorite person in the universe, Spencer.” You sniffle.
Spencer frowns slightly. “Please don’t say that if you don’t-“
“I mean it.” You cut his deflection short again. “I come into the office every morning excited at the thought of seeing you, and I stay sitting on your desk, as close to you as I’m allowed to be, until we’re forced to work; the only time I leave your desk in the mornings is to briefly greet Derek, because he is the only person who knows how I feel and he hugs me in the way I wish you would, to make me feel better.” You explain through your tears. “And you’re right, I don’t smile at you the same way I do at Derek.”
Spencer is uncertain as to whether his heart has given out entirely.
He blinks. Once. Twice. And a third time. Then rapidly, six times, to blink the tears away that dared blur the perfect vision of you in front of him.
“I treat you differently to Derek because I adore you enough to never want to risk overstepping your boundaries with physical contact. I sit on your desk to resist hugging you every morning, I put a bowl of popcorn between us whenever we watch a movie because I’m afraid I’ll subconsciously lean closer to you, and it hurts to put those limitations in place, to feel the ever present distance between us, but I don’t care, because I do it for you, and I’d do it for you forever.” You add, the words falling from your lips so easily, Spencer can almost feel how long you’ve been holding them in.
“(Y/N)…” He chokes out the only word his heart and soul can remember in this moment.
“I never meant to make you feel like you are less important, or that I like you less- I’m so sorry.” The waterfalls from your eyes are too constant for you to manage now, and you let go of Spencer’s hand to hold your own face instead, hiding yourself and your guilt from him in your state of vulnerability.
Spencer glances at the popcorn bowl on the coffee table for a fraction of a second, before he shuffles over on the couch to occupy the space he had been aching to steal from that bowl since your very first sleepover, and very slowly, he wraps his arms around you. And it’s instinctual, the way your hands come away from your face as you wrap your own arms around his neck, your face finding the home it had always longed for in Spencer’s shoulder. As if slotting into place, you find yourself sitting on his lap with no real understanding of how you got there, because all that matters is that he is holding you there.
“I’m sorry for getting jealous, I had no right to.” Spencer’s apology breaks the silence, and he speaks into your hair, his every sense soaking in the sensation, the scent of you.
“I’m glad you did, but you didn’t need to. I’ve been yours since the day we met.” You say, as if your words are a casual statement and not life-altering in a way that changes Spencer Reid’s very brain chemistry.
“You’ve been mine?” He repeats your statement as a disbelieving question.
Wiping your tears with your sleeve, you sigh dramatically. “Yep. Just waited around for you to notice.”
And Spencer can’t quite believe it, but he laughs, shaking his nose into your hair and holding you tighter against his chest.
“I’m sorry for being oblivious, in that case.” He apologizes, his tone more lighthearted now.
“I’m sorry too.” You chuckle.
“From what I understand of confession-scenes, they are not supposed to contain this many apologies.” Spencer muses, making you laugh heartily, his soul very nearly rising out of his body at the sound.
“Everyone knows the best confessions have a bit of angst.” You joke, and Spencer nods, laughing with you.
“And you do have a proclivity for dramatics.” Spencer teases, and you playfully poke his chest, the two of you sharing a giggle like a pair of giddy teenagers.
A pleasant minute of silence passes as you revel in holding each other, an intimacy once pined after finally being felt in full-force, until a question rises in you that simply has to be asked, or you will burst.
“Does this mean that, going forward, our sleepovers can include makeouts?” You pull away from Spencer’s chest enough to watch the shade of pink blossom in his cheeks, his pupils dilating as he looks into your eyes, and he nods.
“I-I believe that is a feature that is well-worth adding to our list of sleepover activities.”
And when he says it like that, how can a girl be expected to do anything but kiss him senseless in response?
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dnd-smash-pass-vs · 17 days
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Inevitable been thinking about how that one anon viewed Laios as a monsterfucker, and I think it made me realize the source of that confusion:
I think many monsterfuckers, and also many (dare I say most) monster devourers like Laios, both derive their desire from the same source: a latent wish for apoteratosis, the wish to become a monster.
Linguistic side note: apotheosis, becoming a god, breaks down to apo- (towards the end point), theo (god), -osis (turn noun into verb), so I swapped in the root for monster, hence apo- terato -osis. Side note over.
Monster devourers are a rather rare archetype in (mainstream) fiction, but they do exist. Those who seek to mimic or emulate the monster's power, those who find them endlessly fascinating and study them well past the point of obsession, those who wish to show their dominance over the monster by proving that they can kill and eat it... and I think Laios is the first I've seen who takes the title quite so literally, where his obsession goes straight to monsters-as-food.
Monsterfuckers, meanwhile wish to become close to the monster in a non destructive way (or at least a typically less destructive one, usually the only casualties are furniture and few bandages are needed, but I'll acknowledge that exceptions definitely exist). They wish to bond with it, to connect to it through lust or intimacy, to be able to stand at its side. They wish, on some level, to join it. Side note, I'm not saying this is true of all teratophiles, some are just kinky and driven by the thought of positive physical pleasure, or who find the personality of a given monster appealing, but I do think the apoteratotic desire is an underlying driver for many, I'd guess well more than half, it's just a subtle enough thing that I don't think most are consciously aware of it.
There's also a third point to the secret apoteratosis triangle that might surprise you: the monster slayer. Sure many, even most, slayers are driven by something like disgust or xenophobia or even rationality, but a significant minority land in the "if you can't join 'em, beat 'em" a.k.a. "I can't be you, so I'll destroy you" camp.
And these three reactions are, I notice, the three most common reactions that people have to one thing: the unattainable desire. The sentence begins "I cannot have it..." and these three camps end it different ways.
The teratophages say "so I shall dominate it." They seek what power they can grasp so they can have some modicum of control, so they can try to "have" it anyway. The kaiju corpse scavengers in Pacific Rim including refined and suave mob boss types just smacks of this attitude.
The teratophiles say "so I'll get as close as I can." There's a werewolf romance book where they're considering trying to turn the girlfriend, though they have no idea if she'll survive it (boyfriend was turned by accident then abandoned, so he's clueless, and they haven't found any others to teach them), and she says that she's fine remaining human, because she shares the power through him. "I have it, because you have it." The façade eventually breaks and in a vulnerable moment she confesses that she'd be willing to risk even a likely death to try to be turned. When they get in contact with an elder who can turn her safely she doesn't even wait a week.
The teratophobes write that whole sentence as "if I can't have it, then no one can." I'm sure everyone has seen enough examples of this behavior to understand that it's just a kind of love turned corrupt.
I'm not the first to notice the underlying apoteratotic urge: the aforementioned werewolf story, indeed many werewolf and vampire stories romanticize the transformation of a human into a monster. Back to Dungeon Meshi, author Ryōko Kui is fully aware of it with how Laios's underlying desire is eventually brought out of the subtext and explicitly named as his dysphoria with humanity, and his wishing that he could be a monster. For Laios that desire skipped right past the socially unacceptable monsterfucking, explicitly a form of bestiality in that world, to the socially acceptable devouring, though tempered by his respect and admiration of monsters into a desire for symbiosis with them. He cannot become one in truth (or so he thought when younger) but he could become part of their food web. It's as close as he thought he could get. Of course, that's the Watsonian explanation; the Doylist explanation is that Ryōko Kui wanted to subvert expectations, and also wanted to explore this angle of it.
So, all taken together, I think people read Laios as monsterfucker coded simply because teratophiles, teratophages, and teratophobes all share the same root motivation: apoteratosis. Thus, all three branches are coded very similarly.
It's similar to something I've seen in Batman fandom: some fans project romantic love between various members of the Batfamily, which is both wildly against canon and thoroughly hated by some other branches of fandom. But it is understandable, since familial love and romantic love both come from the same root, love of another. If someone doesn't recognize the simultaneous similarities and distinctions, it's all to easy to conflate them. If you don't actually understand the distinction, then the signs of affection between siblings might look the same as the signs of affection between lovers. Likewise, if you don't understand the distinction, the urge of the monster devourers (or ecologists) might look the same as the urge of the monster fucker.
I've sat on this for near a month, partially because of my repeated absences, partially because I wanted to honor it with an equally in-depth response. But 24 days later I've still got nothing, while I can't speak for that particular person I think in general you hit the nail right on the head for the base roots. I got no notes. Even with Laios...like all I can add is how supplemental materials actually confirm he did want to be a monster researcher but found books too dry, the only one who seemed to really *get* monsters was shunned. and how wild he goes when talking with an actual werewolf, "The existence I thought unobtainable is now right in front of me".
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