#really pretty game that i didnt even take pictures of all the cool places - realized late about the camera mode | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

an-emovision · 3 years

Text

Someone to you - Izuku Midoriya

--------------------------------------------------------- A/N: Highkey cringed a little when i was editing this but like its fine i guess, hope you enjoy! Trigger warning(s): self esteem issues, low self worth(?)(if you’re feeling these things please know you are wonderful and beautiful just the way you are and someone out there loves you and if no one does then i will >:)) --------------------------------------------------------- "Hey! Good morning Y/N!" You looked up from your phone to find Izuku Midoriyas bright smile. as he made his way towards your figure on the couch you returned his smile with your own tired one. "Good morning Izu" You replied, letting out a yawn and stretching your arms out above you. His brilliant green eyes seemed to follow your every movement as he made note of your current appearance. Given that you were still in what seemed to be your pajamas which consisted of an over-sized white shirt and black shorts, not only that but your hair was all askew. He came to the conclusion that you had just woken up which was correct, so his smile softened as he sat next to you, the couch dipping from his sudden weight on the cream colored cushions. You crossed your legs as you watched him take a seat next to you in the common room of the UA dorms. A sweeter smile gracing your heavenly features as he sat, well at least Izuku thought they were heavenly as he watched your face contort into the smile. His favorite thing about you had always been your smile. The day ahead seemed easy, It was a beautiful Saturday morning. The sky was clear, not a cloud to be seen. Mina even offered you to come shopping with her, Uraraka, and Tsu which you gladly accepted. So why did you feel so...Sad? Nothing necessarily bad had happened that day, nothing more then the usual. It was the weekend which meant no class, but that didn't mean most of your classmates weren't working to better themselves still. Bakugo was picking fights with Todoroki and Midoriya while Ida tried to break it up as usual. Kirishima having to drag Bakugo away so he could cool off. No one really knew what set him off, no one usually does. So the class simply assumed it was Midoriyas existence (which was correct) and went about their day. So why did your figure feel especially heavy today? Why did you feel so upset? "...y/n?....Helloooo Y/N? You okay?" you were snapped out of your thoughts by Mina who had placed a hand on your shoulder and was looking at you with slight worry in her features. Your eyes darted to her golden orbs and gave her a quick nod and a half-assed smile "Yeah! yeah im good!" you let out an embarrassed chuckle as your eyes left Minas and settled on Uraraka and Tsu who were also look at you with slight concern etched into their features. The girls looked at each other for a moment before Mina nodded and continued about her rant about some clothing brand that sold a jacket she really really wanted. The group continued to walk about the mall checking out shops and buying some snacks for your roommates along the way. You still didn't know what was wrong with you, still curious as to why your social stamina wasn't quite up to par today. You were having fun, at least that's what you were telling yourself but in actuality all you wanted was to go home, change into some pajamas and lay in bed for a while. Maybe get lost in your own thoughts while mindlessly scrolling through your social medias. A soft sigh and relief left you as Tsu suggested that they go back home as it was getting pretty late. You, Uraraka, and Mina nodded in agreement then headed for the UA dorms. On the way there you yet again got lost in your own thoughts as the three girls stopped bothering to try and include you into the conversation. Not in a rude way, they could just tell after a while you weren't really up to the task of participating in any conversation. That didn't stop them from asking if you where okay every once in a while. After stepping into the dorms you all went your separate ways. You headed straight for your bedroom after passing out the snacks you had gotten for your friends, these friends being Midoriya, yaomomo, and Kaminari. Your eyes took in the details your familiar dorm room as you closed the door behind you and set your shopping bags by the door. As promised by yourself you collected your pajamas of choice and changed into them before hopping into bed and cuddling into your warm blankets with a gentle content sigh. You sat up and took your phone from your bedside table, then laid back down and continued to scroll through Instagram. Seeing model after model made you feel a little uneasy, almost self conscious. Well 'almost' it did make you feel self conscious, then seeing all of your beautiful friends pictures. Even Bakugos looked awesome. You felt inferior, like maybe you didnt deserve to be friends with such beautiful and talented people. Each and every one of them had something it didnt matter if it was brains or strength but they all had something. and what did you have? You didnt know. In your eyes everything that's happened to you so far was pure luck. You felt tears begin to well up in your eyes as you questioned your own self worth. This wasn't the first time you would lay in your bed and sob, questioning what you did to deserve all of the things that you've been blessed with. There were people out there with no homes, no family, no food and here you where living in a fancy dorm, trying to become a hero and graduate from UA. What did you do to deserve anything you had? why not someone who really really needed it. You didn't see how hard you worked to get where you are, you didn't acknowledge that you worked just as hard as anyone else in Class 1-A. It was easy for someone like Midoriya to recognize, he worked his ass off to control his quirk and get into UA. He always admired your problem solving ability and your quirk. Oh man did he love your quirk, hes made multiple pages of notes on your quirk alone, not even counting your hero suits awesomeness. However, he hated that you brushed off all of your accomplishments as someone else's doing, or gave the credit to luck. Some days all he wanted to do was hug you and tell you every amazing detail about yourself. He wishes he could be as cool as you, really he does. It took him a long time to realize that he didn't just admire you, he had fallen in love with you. He was constantly trying to up his game to impress you and cherished the moments where you praised him no matter how often it was. he truly just wanted to be somebody to you. Midoriya had informed Ida of his feelings for you then proceeded to ask for advice, like Ida knew anything about relationships. Midoriya didn't know about your self esteem issues and you'd rather he didn't as not to worry him, but as you laid on your bed, sobbing and hating yourself for being so weak and crying you couldn't think of anyone better to consult. So you picked your phone up again and scrolled through your contacts, rubbing your now puffy and red eyes as you clicked the call button under his name "Broccoli🥦💚" "Hello?" the corner of your lips tugged into a small smile as you heard his sweet voice. then you cleared your throat before speaking. your voice was a bit hoarse from crying. "U-Uh, hi Izu" You could hear his smile as he greeted you. "Hey Y/N!" he greeted, almost as if he hadn’t read the contact name before picking up the phone "Whats up?" "Are you in your room right now?" It felt a bit awkward to ask and to him it seemed like a slightly odd question to ask but nevertheless he answered. "Uh Yeah, why whats up?" You silently thanked whatever god was out there that he didn't notice your voice sounded as messed up as it did. "uh nothing, I just- Uh can i come over?" He nodded even though you couldn't see him then gave you the okay to come over. You hung up after telling him you'll be over in 5 and slid off your bed, slipping on your slippers before making your way towards your bedroom door. Izuku was panicking a little. Had he done something wrong? you two hadn't really spoken that day so he didn't think that was the case necessarily. Maybe Ida told you about him liking you. Multiple scenes of him telling you of Dekus crush and you looking disgusted after played in his head. Dammit Ida he cursed mentally, not really knowing if Ida had told you or not. He practically jumped out of his own skin when he heard a knock at his door, already knowing it was you he strode over and opened it. Expecting to find you smiling as always however, his "Hey!" got cut short and his grin fell when his brilliant green orbs landed on your damp cheeks and your red and puffy eyes. All fear of you knowing about his crush on you left him, it was replaced with worry and it was clear as day on his face. Upon seeing him, the one that picked you up when you fell down, your first friend at UA, the one that made your cheeks heat up and your stomach to do back flips tears began to stream down your cheeks again. You fell into his arms and without hesitation he embraced you tightly, gently shushing you and running his fingers through your hair in an attempt to calm you down. You let out a gentle hiccup as he hooked his arm under the back of your knees and carried you further into his room after gently closing the door with his foot. Placing you on the edge of his bed and sitting next to you his hand rubbed your back up and down as he gently took you into his embrace again. You loved this man, you really really loved him and it wan't until you were burying your face into his shoulder that you realized it. After your sobs died down and your breathing became normal he gingerly pulled away from you before giving you a soft smile and gently brushing a few strands of hair from your face, still rubbing your back at a gentle pace before eventually stopping and resting on your lower back. "Do you wanna tell me whats wrong now?" He let out in a whisper his eyes never leaving yours. "I-I just-" you where cut off by your own sniffle "I don't know what i did to deserve any of this. I don't deserve to be at UA, hell i don't even deserve my quirk." your voice was small, barely a mumble but he was still able to hear it. That doesn't mean he wanted to hear you talk down on yourself, he couldn't believe what he was hearing really. your eyes left his and landed on your lap as you let out your feelings "I dont-...I dont deserve you" "I can't believe you" Midoriya sounded genuinely upset, your eyes found his again only to be met with a disappointed expression. It wasn't at all what you where expecting but...maybe you deserved it. "How could you say you don't deserve being here when you're one of the most hard working people i've ever met?" Your eyes widened a little, you where going to say how even Mineta works harder then you do but he cut you off before you could "You're absolutely amazing Y/N, having you as a classmate hell even having you as a friend is inspiring. The advice you give to others is amazing, your quirk is awesome, your hero suit is the best one i've ever seen, you could get us out of any situation and-" He was cut off by a pair of soft lips against his. His eyes were saucers and he was stunned, looking at you like a deer in the headlights when you pulled away. Worry settled in your stomach upon seeing his reaction. "I-Im sorry, I shouldn't have done that i just couldn't stop mys-mmph" Now it was his turn to cut you off, with his lips of course. Your eyes where wide for a moment before they gently fluttered closed and you kissed him back. He let out a pleased hum before pulling away to your dismay. The two of you stared at each other for a moment, admiring each others features. His freckle dotted cheeks where now dusted with crimson and so where yours. "I-I didnt know you..." he let out, trailing off at the end of his sentence, you nodded shyly "Y-Yeah I just didnt realize it until a little bit ago." you gave him a sheepish grin as he let out a soft chuckle and nodded. "Yeah i didnt realize it either." then his features became serious and you noticed it, waiting for him to say whatever he was going to say "Seriously, you're amazing. I hate seeing you like this, it breaks my heart" his words left his lips in a mumble as he brought his hand up to caress your cheek. "I know i can't just tell you to stop feeling this way because that's not how feelings work but...I will do my absolute best to help you" he didn't say it out loud, but he was promising this to you. You smiled and nodded, moving to bury your face into his shoulder. He hugged you as he placed his chin on your shoulder, taking in your sweet sent before smiling at the words you let out. "Thank you Izu”

#mha #midoriya izuku #mha x y/n #fanfic #y/n #x y/n #midoriya x reader #my hero academia #writing #ff #x reader #fluff #midoriya fluff #midoriya x you #sfw #oneshot

12 notes · View notes

arlakos · 4 years

Text

Marinette’s list of Parisian Warcrimes (Or why I need to vent about all the bad stuff Marinette has done)

Yeah, I’m doing this.

People be talking on Tumblr about why Marinette is the best character in the show and talking shit about every other character, from Adrien so I think I'll do what I do best and piss off people.

You want another Adrien salt Fic about why he’s a stalker to validate your sensitivity to everything that triggers you?

You want another AU where Chloe goes full-on villain and asshole mode so that you can be just another Astruc stan?

Do you want another Lukanette fanfic because Luka is the ‘Better Adrien’ even though all he does is play a guitar?

TOO BAD! THIS TIME WE BE DOING SOME MARINETTE SALT AND WE GOING IN HARD! WE ARE GONNA BE RUNNING THIS BLUE HAIRED GIRL INTO THE GROUND THE SAME WAY THE FANDOM TREATED THE OTHER CHARACTERS!

THIS IS PAYBACK FOR ALL THE SALT FICS THAT HAVE BEEN FORCED TO SEE THAT DON’T EVEN BOTHER TO USE NATURAL LOGIC!

(And I'm gonna love every bit of it)

So without further ado, Marinette is sentenced to be salted on the following charges:

Having a planner that tracks Adrien's every location/activity so she can stalk him at all times and actively uses (Stormy Weather).

Using her powers to prevent Adrien from dancing with another person (yes, even if that person is Chloe) (Bubbler)

Stealing Adrien's phone (Copycat)

Reading other peoples letters, even if they did throw it in the garbage (Dark Cupid)

Abandoning Paris (Ladybug Origins) (Yes I know people are going to be angry at me especially for this one, but if Everyone gives shit for Chat Noir for doing the same thing in Syren, then Ladybug gets it as well. No double standards on this post)

Literally destroying Max’s hopes and dreams by beating him in a game entering a tournament just so that she could be with Adrien. I don’t care who was better in the game or won, Marinette had no prior interest in the tournament and even knew how much Max wanted to enter, yet still done it anyway the second she realized Adrien was there. Yeah, others will say its cute that she wanted to be with Adrien, but if she really wanted to spend time with him, all she had to do was, you know, ASK LIKE A NORMAL PERSON!!! (Gamer)

Ladybug not listening to advice on where the akuma is all because she didn't like Chloe. who made a small lie before to her. Yeah Ladybug, someone making a little lie to save themselves embarrassment is really valid enough of a reason for their opinion and advice to be worth nothing. And it caused another akuma, good for you. (Antibug)

Oooh, a big one...Marinette stalked Lila and Adrien pretty much all day, under the guise of ‘not liking liars’ (yeah right) and once she had a ‘valid’ excuse to pretty much ruin Lila’s chances of wooing Adrien (whether or not she had an actual chance is irrelevant) she transformed into Ladybug and ABSOLUTELY EMBARRASSED HER AND HUMILIATED HER right in front of Adrien, when she could have just pulled her aside and just told her off in private and quietly so that she wouldn’t do it again. When Adrien questions her says she did it with the excuse of ‘not liking liars’. (Volpina)

Not telling Fu who the book belonged too when questioned on where she got it. I get that this was an excuse to prolong the shows run time, but if you were going to bring this up in the show and pretend that what Marinette did wasn’t a big deal, then they shouldn’t have added it in the first place. (The Collector)

Not bothering to tell her grandmother the truth and sneaking off to hang with her friends. (Befana)

Ladybug leading on Chat Noir. If she really didn't want to go, she could have just outright said No and be done with it, instead of just a ‘maybe’. (Glaciator)

Ladybug Literally not telling Chat Noir about the Guardian or where the hell all these heroes are coming from. There was literally no excuse, Adrien didn’t need to wait ‘until he was ready’, he literally became a hero the same time as Ladybug, it wasn’t like he was ‘the new guy’ and Ladybug was ‘the more experienced one’. I can give this to Fu as well, but I still feel that Ladybug should’ve told him regardless from the get go, she trusted a man she hadn’t properly met until 1 season later more than her own partner who stuck with her since day one. (Syren)

Taking pollen away from Chloe... yeah this really doesnt count. I just simply liked Chloe’s face in Malediktator when she saw Pollen again.

Talking shit about Chloe behind her back then acting all friendly to her as Ladybug when she needed her to become Queen Bee. Not really bad, it's just incredibly rude. (Maledictator)

Again, the same shit as Stormy Weather, instead of being punished for having the planner that details every bit of Adriens day to day activities, she gets rewarded by the writers. Not so much a Marinette crime as it is and ASS-truc crime. (Troublemaker)

Snooping through Marcs Private book, annoying him when he wanted to be isolated, and just straight up not having Marc give him the script himself. She could have tried just bringing Marc to Nathaniel and showing him the script together. (Reverser).

Making a lie about organizing a party when she definitely didn’t plan one. Yes, even if she was going to do it afterwards and planned to make the pastries herself for the party. She really is a hypocrite when she comes to lying, even though that’s a personality trait the writer's press is the reason why she hates Lila. (Season 2 Finale-Catalyst and Mayura).

Sabotaging Kagami’s attempts at being with Adrien. (Animaestro)

Marinette telling her Grandpa that rice bread is better than wheat bread. Anybody who has tasted bread would say otherwise. Although to be fair I blame Tom for this and this isn’t really as bad as the others (Bakerix)

Marinette throws Chat under the bus by pretending she loves him and leaving him to face Tom when the entire thing was her fault. I know she did it to protect her identity, but it still was an ass thing to do, and Chat found Marinette in her own house, Marinette could have used any excuse, including but not limited to, baked goods. (Weredad)

Marinette... LITERALLY... TRIED TO BREAK INTO ADRIEN’S HOME... ALL BECAUSE LILA WAS THERE...if the fireman was smarter than most other characters in the show he could’ve literally called the cops on her, leading to her getting arrested and Gabriel (or even Adrien) filing a restraining order against her. That and she steals Juleka’s bike. Not cool dude. (Oni-Chan)

Marinette not making it very clear to Chloe that she can’t get the miraculous back under any circumstances due to her exposed identity, especially after Chloe claims she’ll need them again. (Miraculer)

Marinette sneaks into the boy’s party despite wanting bro time, all because she wanted another botched attempt to confess to Adrien. (Party Crasher)

THAT CREEPY SCENE WITH THE ‘ADRIEN WAX STATUE’. I dont want to talk about it. You know which one I'm talking about. If you don’t, thank god, but IF YOU THINK THAT WAS CUTE IN ANY WAY OR THAT ITS ADRIEN FAULT BECAUSE HE STOOD STILL, YOU NEED TO GET YOUR HEAD CHECKED. (god i still have nightmares) (Puppeteer 2)

Not really a crime, but talking literally all the miraculi when you only needed a few. What would happen if she screwed up and Hawkmot got all the miraculous, or lost a few for the Akuma to obtain? (Kwamibuster)

Marinette (or Lady Noire) being an absolute dick to Misterbug during the entire time they were fighting Reflekdoll, insulting Misterbug for misusing his power when she does the same thing and claiming Misterbugs usual job is ‘easy’. Yeah...no. Fuck you Lady Noire, go eat a cataclysm to the face (Reflekdoll)

Marinette sabotaging Friendship day for Kagami just because she didnt want the latter to see Adrien.. at all. (Ikari Gozen)

Claiming Adrien is a good guitarist when Luka is an actual one. Not a crime, just dumb (Desperada)

Giving a Miraculous to Adrien when she can’t even control herself around him and could be distracted (Desperada)

Being too cute in that picture Marinette and Adrien sleeping together on the train. Yes i know this isn’t a crime, i do like some stuff about her, i just think the pic is really cute. (Startrain)

(Look at it, they’re adorkable. Awww....)

(Wait, aren’t I supposed to be salty?)

NOW, for the biggest crime of them all...

Literally not confessing to Adrien even once. Aside from the fact its turned the ‘romance part’ of the show into a joke, Marinette not telling Adrien the truth already or lying about her feelings is the reason we have the ‘Marinette is just a good friend meme’. No wonder he thinks you are ‘just a friend’. THAT’S ALL YOU HAVE BEEN TELLING HIM.

My evidence? EVERY SINGLE EPISODE!!!

...

Ahhhh. Much better.

Well, now that I have successfully gotten rid of all that anger and salt and manifested it into a physical memento of my anger for this show and its main character, I’m going to relax while people get mad and triggered that I insulted the ‘Perfect Marinette’ and leave me angry messages. For all those that listened and don’t hate me or even agree with what I have said, thanks for reading my large amount of vented writing. I hope you have a pleasant day.

Let's hope for season 4 of Miraculous to be better now that Zag is back. The fandom knows we don't need another salty season.

#Miraculous Ladybug #Season 1 to 3 #ML salt #A lot of salt #Marinette salt #Probably a lot of Marinette hate #AND FOR GOOD REASON #A bit of writer salt as well #A lot of ASS-truc Salt #Miraculous Ladybug salt

179 notes · View notes

shiro-0197 · 3 years

Note

Oh my gosh Shirooooo <3 bae hiiii :D that's so lucky, I hope you guys see each other :] also, how's prep going?? How does it feel to be back in school? Hope everything's well. I'm sure you're acing all your questions (as usual ;)

ooh, I overslept today morning. It was NOT pretty. I woke up because I had a school meeting and my teacher was like "Ariana switch your camera on" and (grr I was forced to) I looked so sleepy 😭 because I had literally just woke up. Talk about embarassing smh. but I have holidays till Monday! in commemoration with my second favourite holiday; Chinese New Year (it's the year of the ox ˃ᴗ˂)

aww :(( at least pretend to sleep, if I ever attempt convincing you then :] I'll hug you (and I have a firm grip when I'm half asleep 😪) flashcards?? I see!! Do you use Quizlet? I'm sure you can do it, you're capable of that (and so much more!!) I love you too, bae.

lmao it was. They've asked us to submit pictures of ourselves for this year's magazine. So thankfully, no sorting.

nah, it was a good one. You're so cute shjxjsks. Rip the pictures, but there's space for more :D oh my gosh I understand that!! Like 😭😭 do I have time for another fandom?? No. Does my brain listen?? Also no (my brain had apparently decided we're gonna be simping over Darren Criss for the next 10 business days. Don't ask me why, but I've watched every single one of the movies/series he's starred in.)

Oh btw!! I tried creating an oc (this is my first time don't judge 🥺🥺) anyways, she's so cool, I WANT TO BE HER. Or marry her, idk whichever works.

just my dad 😌 my mom and the rest of my family have a very long way to go, but i try educating them whenever I can. Thanks for saying that, and I really hope the world changes in the future. There's literally no place for prejudice anymore :( but despite all that, the most important part is that our families love us, and although there are some things we wish could change over time, I'm so glad for that precious fact.

haha I see :'D that's right, tho I'm so happy you've settled into a schedule!! A bummer, but there'll be those teatimes, right?

that shirt. It's so cute I might cry. The frog 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺. f o r g

Aaaa yep yep. I miss you so much too. But I'm really thankful no matter how busy our lives get, we always manage to find a way to reply every once in a while. It really makes me realize that we're meant to be friends, yk? like not even the lack of time or the (unfortunate) abundance of distance can stop us. I find that special. And by God that just made me realize how much I truly love you. Which is; A LOT.

—Ari

Hello!!!! Happy late valentine's day!!

Look at this thing I made, tbh my first time making a valentine card and it was so funny. This ones for you<3

It's going well!! We had a cool party yesterday, not for Vs day (we done celebrate that here) but for Abi's day! That's basically our mentors' celebration. Our grade threw a concert for them with games and performances, and I was leading the whole show? Like, I introduced the performances and games and etc. It was nerve wrecking but I survived, and they liked it! We had huge fun. Glad I didnt have to dance. Also, we tried making that frog cake (have you seen it?) And I didnt take a pic (I asked my friend but he still hasnt so uhm) but as good as it tasted, the frog looked more like a green blob. But he (abi) liked it anyway

Ouchhh😭😭 I know, I remember one time when I overslept and literally had one minute to set everything up so I delayed hygiene and breakfast to later. When I was eventually forced to turn on my camera I looked like this

Also that's so cool I hope your holidays were good!! Happy Chinese new year!!

Nahh I use some random flashcards app because quizlet was too heavy for my poor phone to handle, but now I fixed it so I think I should try that one. Thank you for the idea!!

OMG SHE'S SO WONDERFUL I LOVE HER SO MUCH I ADORE HER HAIR AND !!! AND !!!!!! Dont worry love she's great !!! 🥺🥺

Yeah, that's true. Too bad for my family that I dont love them😘 okay I'm so sorry for ruining the vibe, you're absolutely right !! I'm really glad too.

Well, sometimes, yeah! But usually the mentors are really busy, and it gets kinda lonely since I'm alone from my class. Well, there is one guy, but he goes home after 5, so yeah hes not here for a while

Ohh I'm always so surprised with the way you speak. I really find myself struggling with the answer when you say something as good as that because tbh all I can say is "🥺🥺🥺 yeah" but yes!!! It makes me really happy. I'm very glad to be your friend!! I love you so much, Ari ♡♡♡ I hope you're having a great day

Also, have a funnie

This is literally me with all my characters

#Ari💕

1 note · View note

macklives · 5 years

Text

homestuck recap

i hated this so fucking much bc my 2 am bitch-ass didnt want to read a recap thats probably longer than any slowburn out there

anyways here it is

also, uhhH sorry im using this as a end of session discussion bc that shit gets explained in her as well. and im not writing up more recaps of a recap so this is where im done for the day. (by done for the day i mean last nights session, im still doing a liveblog soon. i just wrote this yesterday)

also that this is long

you dont have to read it, theres nothing of importance

ive been coping with humor to get me through it

neato.

have fun with what i suffered through:

why was “beta” the only thing unhighlighted?

like did i miss a page???

OH its the beta version of HS thats why

damn its like 5 pages and thats it

mmh

well youll all be happy to know im clicking every single one of these links again bc i like looking back like ahh i remember that. good times. also in case i forgot some shit existed.

do you think andrew had fun writing this? or was he like “fuck”

thats a lot of fucking package talk. good thing im not confused as of now and remember it pretty clearly. of else, this early on in the recap, id be screwed.

god remember when i did an analysis on each item and what it did

i feel as if i have the technology engrained inside my head right now

cruxite, alchemeter, all that jazz

flashbacks are starting up already

yeah, that was the good part in homestuck where i knew 100% that i probably would continue on this liveblog in its entirety, ngl

that one explosion scene. bc it kept me going.

OH W A IT SHIT

i just realized how the intermission spades probably fucking foreshadowed the whole jack revolts thing and gains the ring, which was also technically JOHNS fault considering he slashed up the doll in the first place

my god, i guess thats the only good aspect of the recap. looking back at things and realizing the missing pieces.

oh that makes sense for the whole “this prototyping had no effect on the enemies, since he was already in the medium” i didnt actually think about that

little did rose know where that would get her right now

oh yeah

there’s still the whole entire lab terminal thing and how mom basically knows the place exists. i guess we’re still venturing onto that and itll come up later when we find out how mom knows SO MUCH about the game.

still think shes some weird spy or secret agent

i kinda love her ngl

anyways, theres literally no reason for skaia to produce a cloning machine. so technically, they only sent the meteors in, right? so who put the cloning machine in if not mom?

oh yeah that impact was nerve wrecking asf

and still at this point in the comic i called dave fuckboy red

huh, how times change

i hated reading that whole paragraph ngl, the frustration just kicked me in the boobs again

yeah nobody else got tornadoes, huh?

OH that makes also much more sense

bc she did prototyped them before she entered the medium.

i gotcha

man one of my favorite edits i made, rose hitting that meteor with a bat

are you

telling me

the exiles structures they arrived on were in the form of the items the kids used to enter the medium?

THE EGG

THAT EXPLAINS “EGG”

of course it was 413 years ago. that was never explained. simply vague “many years in the future....” but i expected no less from this

man serenity is the most wholesome character in hs no doubt

damn thought andy here was really gonna spoil us jade’s planet

okay cool, im glad i now have the layout to the whole “their stations went to the coordinates of the home button” shindig

man i honestly dont know what else to say besides “yeah cool recap” when i already pretty much know what went down? ofc im looking into each link and shit and adding in things when i see fit, but otherwise its just me going “ah good times” yknow

the whole meteor thing kinda makes sense now?

we’re still missing a few pieces of info but we’re getting there, folks

oh yeah that reveal

god jade and dave have it in the shits for parents huh

bro isnt the best and jade has a fucking dog

who lowkey

is doing better than bro

who knew a fucking dog is a better guardian than bro lmfao

dreambot = terminator. im telling you.

sorry im still on that idea and it will never leave unless i have the actual proof in front of me that its not going to become a thing. meaning, ive finished hs and theres still no terminator dreambot or either andrew himself gives me a canon letter with “the robot is not arnold, mackenzie, pls just let it be”

why is the entire game session highlighted

i swear to god if this is like to a second recap or smth of the whole game session i may fucking CRY

okay thank god its just a design of the skaia layout

which is honestly cool

idk why its blurry tho but i can at least see the layout now. which is honestly how i pictured it anyways.

yeah, john did make a huge impact in his friends’ life and i find that so fucking touching

yep. got that. everything loops around. cool.

especially when the trolls come in. god we havent even gotten to that recap portion yet, we havent even gotten to the INTERMISSION

pls can this be the halfway point to the recap

AT LEAST

so they were exiled after the whole jack: ascend thing, right? considering theyre way in the future. man no fucking wonder.

speaking of jack

man that whole dad and jack interaction was gold, ngl

OH THAT EXPLAINS THE RING THEN

and wow, andrew’s really giving us the best female content huh. andrew is the true god of equality and diversity.

also hey, i didnt realize that wow. so PM tricked the queen in showing the parking ticket to be able to take the present from jack. she’s a smart cookie, that one..

she and PM basically snitched on jack and it was the best thing that has happened to me so far

oh yeah okay

but why did AR panic over bec? bc thats something we havent learned yet, right?

anyways

exile town, the only town which should exist. facts. i dont make the rules.

noice

i love PM being queen. like.. thats canon now. shes an actual queen.

yeah that was a fun game and the consorts were cute

fuck yeah the dick head

hate them even more now that i know john was killed because of them

anyways, i wonder what dick move dave’s denizen did? maybe thats why its filled with lava bc the denizen was like “fuck it. make the land red. kill them all”

UH WHAT

WHAT

OH MY GOD HOW DID I JUST FORGET NANNAS LETTER LIKE THAT LMFAO

THEIR TITLES WERE THERE THE WHOLE TIME!

so i still dont know what they mean but i can gather it has something to do with the game giving them abilities. considering dave is the “knight of time” and he can go back in time. whack.

which means john can either control someones breathing or simply wind. and rose is... like that one girl in the winx club who does the sun shit. bc whenever i think of light powers, i think of stella.

and jade is space. witch of space.

nice

i have no idea what that means ngl

okay finally

we’re at the trolls

maybe this recap will end soon

i remember when i thought they were internet bullies

yesss

someone asked if i basically knew the trolls were on a different veil than the kids, so not presently with them, and i know lol. i was making a joke before btw. jsyk. dont think im incompetent to forget these things when sometimes i choose to forget it so i can add in a joke

it be like that, i annoy many

then again, pls dont assume im trying to say im not incompetent bc im also a fucking dumbass and DO forget shit and i have no excuse

imagine being so bored on the meteor, your last resort is speaking to aliens

ngl me if i was ever trapped on a meteor and could potentially do that

nah ik its bc its their only hope at helping with their session or whatever tf CG said to john. but there was BOUND to be a conference meeting between them like “okay guys. humans. that needs to be sorted out” and you just hear CG screaming in the background

i cant wait to meet them honestly bc im growing on all 4 of the ones we’ve seen already. and on top of that, i know what they look like and i know theyre not THAT bad, just a little on the crayy zee side sometimes

but theyre trying

OH MY GOD

I GET IT

FUCK

DOES THAT MEAN THE INTERMISSION IS *APART* OF THE MAIN FUCKING STORY??

AND SPADES IS WV FOR THE TROLLS

GOD D A M N

wow

i didnt expect that. but maybe the signs were there and i was just willingly choosing to ignore it or smth bc “haha couldnt be, right”

flashbacks to how i thought the trolls were humans

anyways, i guess he got his revenge on the kids version of “snowman” ie the black queen. but really

he did not have to do that. he could have cut off the finger and fled. but he decided “nah, lets implode her” so the loml is dead and all i got was a catchy song

i knew they were different types of “bullies” but now i just have to replace bullies with uhh

trolling strategies

anyways, this is cute. i love how they’ve come to be friends through mutual frustration. good part in the comic.

i wonder why it explodes

more importantly

....

terminator time?

this was my favourite sequences of dialogues in the whole entirety of homestuck. that is to say the back and forth thing that the kids went through to become a sort of wingman for the other.

absolutely gold.

all except AT’s rap.

GC was the only smart one with the linear shit

anyways fuck he still has to kill the denizen now but apparently its hard to beat for a sleeping dick head so

that will be fun for the future

john will probably need to kill A LOT of imps to get there

yeah rose is a badass bc she slayed that thing with needles of all things

OH and the white queen was the cursive

damn did AR ever do the whole guide process to a kid yet? maybe he will with dave, idk

oHHH

i fucking SEE

thats why he said DNA

to use it and replace all the life forms in the ocean

fucking neat wow

man that sounded sarcastic but im genuinely impressed bc all i got was bullshit as i read jaspersprites log

so thats the secret. it was “meow” bc that somehow translates to the genetic code she needs then. and that code apparently took fucking years to write as well. sick. whack. oh man.

derse is very pretty, ngl

and wow shit

“dave had already been awake in his tower all along without realizing it” how tf does someone just

do that, awake in both places at once

i didnt even fucking realize that fact as i read that pesterlog wow

ah yes, around the time things got confusing

okay so the capsule makes sense bc at first i didnt know it was a fucking time capsule so i got confused as to how it just apparated the game lmfao

the more you know i guess *twinkle*

i find that a neat concept tho

like the whole whatever you prototype affects the imps and shit

yeah so that whole “he had no advice” basically impacted his future

no shit dave wanted to reset things bc he probably thought he caused some sort of bad butterfly effect and killed his best friend

fuck calsprite thats all im gonna say

i read that first sentence and i think i got an aneurysm

and then everything else just made me sad again

i mean good thing he fucking did amirite?

we got pain at first but now we got cool shit like idk

fucking DAVESPRITE

damn idk how that works

will rose have like two minds now? or will this be some steven universe fusion shit?

“and understood their meaning” course well i fucking didnt so could you pls elaborate, rose?

okay but then what the fuck did he use that was inside the fucking box

bc i thought he used his knife?

im only every going to refer him as that now, thank you andrew

alright okay..

god that was a lot

i dont know what will happen once i click on those links but i am going to see that for myself bc i refuse to add ANYTHING ELSE

81 notes · View notes

pbandjesse · 4 years

Text

Another day I got so many stupid blisters. This is why I wear sandals all summer because shoes just really jack me up. But I am starting camp on monday and Baltimore is so sweaty all the time and Im not sure on what shoes will be best. So me and James spent some time researching today and got me some hiking shoes he thinks will be good for the terrain. They will be here on tuesday so Im hoping itll just work out well.

Today was a pretty excellent day even if it was to hot. I slept okay. Falling asleep was really hard again. I just keep getting really hot. The weighted blanket helps me fall asleep but I just wish it was cooler in here. Itll be fine. Just gotta tweak some stuff I guess. I might get us some black out curtains or something.

I got up around 930. I just didnt want to do anything. I knew we would be leaving around 11. So I just. Laid in bed. I did get up and get dressed eventually.

I had breakfast. Hung out with James. We made sure our bags were good to go. We waited on Brandon and his girlfriend Winnie. We sat outside on the stoop. My backpack strap decided to break all of a sudden so we had to deal with that. But then friends were there and off we went.

I kind of realized pretty quickly that I was not wearing the right shoes. I did not wear what is in my picture. I was wearing my new tshirt dress and old brown boots. And while I was comfortable I was also very hot. The dress is dark and the fabric is nice and thick. Itll hold up a long time. But being in direct sunlight was not fun!! But we got down to the BSA and there were so many people. We found more friends. Lots of water and snacks. We walked to the school board building and they read their demands. It was great. There were music performances and while I was very hot, I was also really glad to be there.

James and Benairen were standing on the steps. Brandon and Winnie were taking videos. I was sitting in the shade. It was a good day.

Someone was handing out ice pops to the kids around. Someone gave me gatorade. Helped me feel better. I was hot in a different way than the other day. I was way sweatier. So the gatorade helped a lot.

But after an hour or so I needed to tap out. James let Brandon know and me and him and Benairen were going home and if they needed a place to rest after they were more than welcome.

Benairen let us know he had a hand cut and we stopped to look at that and I suggested we get him liquid banaid so we decided to take him to our place to get him fixed up.

We passed a guy who was very confused and gave him some snacks and directions. But soon enough we were home.

We all kept masks on. I sat in front of a fan. Fixed up wounds. I showed our animal crossing island off. Brandon and Winnie werent long behind us. It was just a very hot day. So we all cooled off. And then once my silly animal crossing tour was over they headed out.

It was nice to be with friends. Its still so scary but I think things are getting better. Were in phase two now and while its yet to be scene what the 2 weeks after protests are going to look like. At least people are still wearing masks most of the time at those. The cases were mostly seeing right now are from restaurants and the memorial day weekend people. Because of the two week incubation period. Honestly I just keep seeing people still going to the beach and not having masks on and I just want to scream. Like I want to go to the beach too but I will be wearing a mask for the foreseeable future. Though not the mask I wore today. That material just gets hot to fast. I have other ones though so Im good.

It was nice to be clean and dressed. I put the AC on in the living room and me and James hung out there. We ordered burgers. Looked for shoes online. James's new video game came and now he can play with all his boy friends so Im happy to see him happy. But I started not feeling well. Just very sun tired.

And now I am just ready to get some rest.

I hope you are all having a good night. Tomorrow I have lots of work to do. Wish me luck. Love you all.

3 notes · View notes

noreasonreally · 4 years

Text

i don’t know. i don’t know why i keep avoiding writing. i want to work on this story bc it’s fun and cool and a way to bond with my aunt who lives far away. but i probably need to write more about how i’m feeling. and journaling takes a long time by hand. and this is a good place for venting personal shit. idk. we’ll see.

i want to write about the feelings in this story but i may have delved too deep into my own psyche. my own sore spots.

i had an anxiety attack a couple nights ago. i keep having nightmares. part of me blames re-watching stranger things but i also watched parks n rec before i went to bed and also i had nightmares before re-watching stranger things. so that theory’s debunked.

i told my brother about the Big Trauma and he said he was sorry and that it explained a lot and on one hand what a relief! on the other hand he made it sound like that’s the reason i cut our father out of my life and that’s Not The Reason. i told him he didnt need to worry about changing his behavior right now bc he’s got a lot on his plate and just... whatever dude, he doesn’t need to. i didn’t tell him bc i wanted him to change.

i mean it would be nice if he were angry.

but i didn’t expect him to be.

and for all i know, he took this information to my dad and was convinced i’m full of shit.

the thing is i’ll never know. i have no idea what he thinks or feels, ever. i hope that when our father and grandfather die, he’ll open up. i don’t know if it’ll be too late by then.

and trust me, i’ve tried to “save” him.

no one wants to be “saved” against their will.

so i just watch. i take the peace offerings. i hope playing video games and drinking like 3 alcoholic beverages and old movie quotes will give us some sense of connection. i got drunk and spilled my guts and he hugged me and i want something more but i know he can’t give me anything more.

and then two nights ago he comes home - one of the brief intermissions from his 3 jobs, separation from his wife, new girlfriend, and taking care of our demented grandfather who molested me when i was too young to know it was bad - one of the brief moments where i see him for half an hour, an hour tops - and he immediately says “i’m going to sit uncomfortably close to my sister!” thinking he’s funny. and he does. and i calmly say i’m changing seats and he “apologizes for making me move, because he was kidding,” and i want to believe he’s silly, and i want to believe he’s kidding, and i want so badly to believe that my brother heard me, and respects me, and knows how it feels to be powerless.

i want to believe that he knows that. i want to believe that deep down, he has some intuition and it’s just buried under the fucking bonkers notions from my toxic paternal family members.

but i go to bed early and have an anxiety attack.

because pinning me to the side of the couch for shits and giggles after i tell you some intense shit, is not cute or funny. you never did that shit before. it doesn’t just go away.

i want to blow up at him, i want to scream, i want to feel like i’m not powerless anymore. i want to force him to see me for who i am, for what i truly feel, for what i’ve truly been through, because it’s real and valid and it’s fucking painful.

and i know being triggered means my reactions might be out of line. so i’m careful with what i say. i’m thoughtful. i don’t want to pin twenty-odd years of resentment and pain on the idiot who doesn’t even know what he’s putting himself through.

but it also feels like i just got another kick in the head over something that was never my fault.

another reason to say “oh poor old dad” and write me off.

i know there’s a big grey area between the worst: expecting him to involve my father in my trauma - and the best: him saying he also denounces the paternal side of our family. i know that “i’m sorry that happened, that explains a lot” is a pretty good reaction, all things considered.

i guess it’s just hard to realize that nothing will ever be enough to erase it from happening. of course i knew this in my head. but i definitely thought i would have... some kind of epiphany after telling my brother.

if i never told him, i could still hold onto the fantasy of him responding with “that’s horrible! i’m never seeing any of them again unless you want to go yell at them for being awful.”

the reality of “thanks for saying i don’t have to change anything about what i’m doing” isn’t as heroic. or comforting.

so i watch. we play video games and trade places on the couch and drink beer sometimes. i visit with my nieces and teach them how to scold the dog for being too rough and build towers with them and their dad. it doesn’t hurt to see other men being good dads anymore.

and before anyone asks, yeah, my soon-to-be ex-sister-in-law has already banned him from taking their girls to visit our father or grandfather.

man.

how does anyone do this? i don’t feel “broken,” or “unlovable” - i have pretty much everything i need to feel safe and happy, frankly. i’m in a pretty good place and i do my best to help others get to a good place, too.

but that doesn’t mean the trauma isn’t there. it doesn’t mean my ptsd is magically gone. my anxiety attacks and nightmares still hang out. i still woke up screaming “you don’t own him” this morning.

i want to connect the dots and figure out what the big picture is - how to make it “good trauma,” like diane in bojack horseman, and do something so that i’m a success and i can point to my trauma and say “nana-nana boo boo, i’m gonna make other people’s lives better,” and then poof! it’ll be solved and i won’t feel bad anymore and i’ll sleep like a totally normal individual.

what’s really happening is that i’m excited if i can keep myself present for two seconds.

and ultimately i don’t want any of this shit to go away. i work hard not to make it the focus of all my energy, but at the same time, i’m glad i know how to do that. because i know how to pay attention to myself and care about myself and fill my cup, so to speak, so i’m not in a constant state of needing validation like i used to be. and i know how to give genuine words of affection. i’m still working on a lot of things but i’m glad i generally know how to work on ‘em.

and if more fucked up shit happens i’ll work on that too.

i’m okay. no matter what my brother says, or doesn’t say, no matter how many anxiety attacks i have, no matter how many walls i have to break down to become the person i want to be and know i will be, i know i can do it. i do have power over my life. i do think i’m worth the effort. i’m conflicted by a lot of things but that’s ok. i can be all the things.

#god have mercy this is too many words #personal #oh fuck uh trigger warning #trigger warning #tw #if u have ever seen a gun don't read this (bad joke about triggers just don tlook at me)

2 notes · View notes

comphersjost · 5 years

Text

sugar daddy ➸ morgan rielly hcs!

listen this is all i’ve been thinking about all day okay i need this in my life i just want a sugar daddy mo in my life please

find my masterlist here

okay so listen

you’re probably like a photographer or something in media for the leafs

running around making sure the boys get places on time

interviews, shoots, the fucking plane, everything

and you’re really young, yk, you’re maybe 20 or so

and accelerating your education seemed like a good idea

but now you’ve got a ton of debt

so you get a job at the starbucks near your shitty apartment

you have to make ends meet right?

and its so exhausting, running around and often working 8 or more hours at each job

but you have to put on a smile for the boys and for the customers and for your bosses at both jobs

but it’s definitely taking its toll because you’re just so tired all the time

but it’s a good thing you work at a coffee shop isnt it?

morgan likes to walk around random parts of the city when he’s stressed

and hes totally been trying to work up the courage for a while to just talk to you and to get to know you fr

he’s just so fucking attracted to this young, smart, funny, and kind photographer that’s somehow responsible for team of actual children

it’s after a game and a tough loss that he comes in

it’s like 1:53 am when he walks into this starbucks on the opposite side of toronto from where his giant ass condo is

and he sees you

no, not like, oh hey you happen to be here at the same time as me,

but he sees you as in you’re coming from the back room, re-tying your apron behind you

and just like that you’re back to running around and doing too many things at once, just like how you are at the arena

somehow even at almost 2 am, your store is pretty busy

so when the next person in line steps up and you make eye contact with him you almost choke

and mo’s eyes widen and he opens and closes his mouth a few times

“hi what can i get you?” you squeak before he can say anything stupid

he def is hesitant giving you his order but does it anyways and is kind of shocked when you ask for his name for the order

you dont make eye contact while you make the drink, making sure to just call out his name when it’s ready and go back to running around

and he’s about to ask to talk to you when you suddenly straighten up and tell your shift “i’m gonna go restock the back” and you’re gone again

you probably avoid morgan for a few days, maybe a couple weeks even, after that

he ends up cornering you in your office when you’re editing pictures or something after practice

“why? why didn’t you tell me?”

you sigh, having expected this conversation since you saw him

��because it’s not relevant to any conversation we’ve had.”

“relevant? of course it’s relevant!” he throws his hands up, “we’re a team, a family, and you shouldn’t have to work 2 jobs!”

“well some of us don’t make millions of dollars a year morgan!” you finally snap at him “some of us have to work 16 hours a day to make ends meet! and even then we’re still barely living paycheck to paycheck!”

he recoils at your words, because he never though about the fact that the leafs organization might not be paying you enough to get you through your debts and bills

“let me help”

you almost choke when he says that

“no. absolutely not. i’m not a child nor am i a charity case okay? i’ve been on my own for a long time.”

he doesnt give up, and continues to press you until you kick him out of your office

after that things with morgan get a little...flirtier you could say

his touch is lingering

he’s making eye contact with you across the room and not looking away

but he’s also very publicly inviting you out with the team, watching your squirm while you have to come up with a lie every time as to why you couldn’t

and not to mention game days

holy shit he comes in wearing his game day suit and maintains eye contact with you the whole time

walk walk fashion baby

it’s only a matter of time before you cave, he thinks

and he’s right

it’s about a month later that you’re at some gala for the team

and thank god the leafs organization payed for your shit because this dress and these heels would’ve used up two entire paychecks

and morgan’s shamelessly flirting with you that night, touching you along your back and your arms and letting his hand rest on your thigh when you’re seated

it isn’t long before he has you bent over the hood of his expensive ass sports car

and for a second you’re worried because holy shit this car is worth more than your fucking life

the thought flies out the window though pretty soon

cause mo is pounding into you from behind yk, pressing you against the cool metal of the sleek black sports car

you’re choking out moans and squeals of his name and when he wraps a hand around your neck you cry out

“daddy!”

and he freezes for a second before going at you even harder

he squeezes your throat

“yeah, honey, gonna come for daddy? huh? gonna let daddy take care of you?”

and you know theres a double meaning behind his words but you just cry out

“yesyesyes, daddy, you take such good care of me, fuuuuck”

and then you’re coming while he rails you into a car that’s worth more than your existence and when he comes he forces you into another orgasm

and with all the work and running around you havent been able to get laid in a long long time

and he’s so good that you just feel so weak and drained afterwards

and then he whispers gently “you’re calling off working tomorrow, you need sleep, and i’m gonna cover everything for you for at least the next two months”

as much as you want to argue, you’ve slept maybe 10 hours in the past 2 weeks and you dont have it in you

and yeah it would be nice to be taken care of for a little bit

mo is so soft and sweet with you when he takes you home

as if he didnt just fuck the life out of you

and when you wake up in his bed, you’re a little disoriented for a second

he’s already awake, facing you with his arm wrapped around your waist

he’s pressing kisses into your neck and shoulder and you jump at the sudden realization of

“fuck! i have to get to work!” and mo pulls you back down and reminds you that everyone has a day off today

which you’d forgotten due to lack of sleep and the fact that you’d lost track of what day it even was anymore

he pulls you into his chest and buries his nose in your hair

“please, just let me take care of you,” he murmurs

you’re about to argue, now having the energy to, when he speaks again

“fuck, you work so fucking hard, and you’re amazing at what you do, and you’re so young, you don’t deserve all of this i’m not asking you to quit either job or move in with me if you dont want to or anything, i’m just asking you to let me help you. i dont want or expect anything in return okay?”

“mo, i-“

“please just think about it okay? i wanna lighten the load a little bit. and make sure you get enough sleep. i just wanna help you.”

it takes you a few days to think it over and get back to him

but you say yes, smiling shyly up at him, thanking him over and over

and he insists that you dont need to thank him

and you also are kind of embarrassed, but you ask him if the offer still stands for you to move in with him.

cause your apartment kinda sucks and the electricity is shitty and the water shuts off sometimes

and you try and promise to pitch in for rent or utilities

but he doesnt even let you breathe in the direction of the bills

which is kind good cause holy shit he lives in a swanky part of town so of course they’re expensive

i feel like he’d try not to push your boundaries, but after that first time you fucked, you just want more

and you initiate things and fuck he wants you so bad

and he tells you that he really really likes you, not just physically

and asks you out on a proper date

but you’re really not there yet, so you definitely sleep in separate rooms

but he pampers you yk

its started off as just covering your basic needs, and then to buying you clothes

and accessories

and a new laptop

and then getting your phone fixed

and then comes the lingerie

and the jewelry

and holy fuck does mo spoil you

he makes good on his promise tho

you keep your job with the leafs and your job as a barista

but being a barista becomes more of an occasional thing yk

because its fun not because you have to pay your student loans

he’s everything you’ve ever wanted

he’s attentive and caring and so fucking good to you

and loves to spoil his girl

and no one on the team is really surprised when he shows up at a bar after a win with his arm wrapped around you

they just chirp him and expose him to you about how he’s liked you forever

you just smile up at him and kiss his cheek

and you’re really glad that he found out your little secret

#like #its all i can think about #work today was rough #all because of THIS #fuck #mo daddy #morgan rielly #morgan rielly smut #maple leafs #maple leafs imagine #maple leafs smut #morgan rielly imagine #nhl #nhl imagine #hockey #hockey imagine #nhl smut #hockey smut #sugar daddy!morgan rielly

216 notes · View notes

dontyouhearmehowling · 4 years

Note

oh my god. Ok so I just scrolled through your blog and my heart hurts because there is so much love and just so much stuff I can relate too and I just ahhh damnnn it I cant even but like can I please have the story of your relationship with this girl your with? please? i'm a hopeless romantic I feel too much I love so hard my own love life is complicated but i know the kind of love you talk about thats exactly how i love the love of my life too so yours is a story I need to hear

ok so. it all started on April 31st, 2018. i reblogged one of those ask games and she sent me an emoji that said “i’m too scared to talk to you but i think you’re great” and i was like do it!!! and she did!!!! she texted me after i had already gone to sleep tho, so i only answered the next day. but then we talked all day. and the next. and the next. and we never ran out of things to talk about and even only knowing her for a few days i already felt comfortable enough with her to talk about anything?? it was wild. since day 1 we’ve had this connection that i’ve never had with anyone else and its my favorite thing in the world. after like a week we already had a bunch of inside jokes, something that i’d never had before, and i was already crushing on her. ok so we became very close friends like immediately, and i mostly ignored my crush on her bc i thought she didn’t like me back and usually i’d get meaningless crushes on everyone at first before i met her. but then this other girl and i started flirting and i realized i didnt like her bc i liked c too much, so i broke things off and kinda went like “oh shit this is real” and decided that i’d just stay friends with c until i eventually couldnt take it anymore and had to tell her abt my feelings bc thats how i am. anyways ok cool meanwhile i made her watch the good place on rabb.it with me which will be relevant later.

ok so fast forward to may 21st or something around that time. its time to sleep bc i have school the next day so we say goodnight, but then i guess she says something or reblogs something and i get sad bc i realize she doesnt like me back. so i make some hashtag sad posts abt yearning and then i realize i told her i was going to sleep and i didnt want her to think i didnt want to talk to her so i text her again and say like “ok i was going to go to sleep but then i got sad abt my crush” and SHE GOES “you have a crush????????” and im there like. what in the hell bc not only did i not try to hide it At All, i constantly posted about it and had an entire tag about her and i thought it was pretty obvious. so anyways i go “yes?? i thoought you knew that?? im literally always posting about it??” and she asks me to talk abt the crush and who it is. i say “just stalk the tag if u want, im going to sleep” then shes like “nO WAIT WHO IS IT” and im like. blatantly ignoring that and my heart is already beating out of my chest but she Really wants to know and then at one point i say “please dont make me answer that” so shE SAYS “you’re making me think that its me” and i say “i dont know what you want me to say” and SHE GOES “I WANT YOU TO SAY THAT ITS ME BC I HAVE A HUGE CRUSH ON YOU” so i just. die. right then and there. also yknow we talk about it and its like after 1 am and im just happier than i’ve ever been. ok so 2 days later she asks me out Officially and its great and shes the cutest gf ever and she made me feel more wanted than i’d ever felt in my entire life. then 6 days later she sends me a big big big text on tumblr and long story short (bc it was kinda personal), she would be deleting her all social media for the summer.

so she was gone. and we had only dated for a week at this point, but we’d known each other for 2 months, and i already loved her. i already knew she was the love of my life. i didnt even try to move on, i’d tell people i didnt wanna move on cuz i knew i was meant to love her. i had another blog like this that i used to talk about how much i loved and missed her (so like. exactly like this). i literally reasoned with myself that like. that happened because before i met her i was in a really bad place after a terrible relationship and i was almost giving up on finding someone who actually made me feel loved bc i thought it would never happened, so i was like “ok so i was in a really bad place, so the universe brought my soulmate a little early just for a while so that i would know i had to hold on, and when its actually time for us to be together, it will bring us to each other once again” like i actually told myself that, in those words. and yknow what? i wasnt even wrong. on july 15th she texted me from an empty tumblr with her old url and at first i literally couldnt believe it but we talked for hours and hours and i asked her what happened bc i thought she was disconnecting for the summer and she said “i was. i am. i just couldnt not talk to you anymore” and she said that she thought about me every single day, and i told her i missed her and she said she didnt text sooner bc she thought i’d be angry at her and ofc i wouldnt, i could never be angry at her and besides, she was just taking care of herself and i said i dont think i could be anything less than head over heels for for, and she said she felt the same way, but wasnt ready to be more than friends yet. but that had always been more than enough for me. just having her in my life would always be more than enough for me. so we stayed friends.

then, on august 9th i got this ask.

and she saw it after i said i was gonna go to bed (bc again, i had school the next day) and she texted me a whole thing about how that was the nicest thing anyone had ever said about her and that i should be asleep but she had to get it out of her chest and that her anxiety made it hard for her to show how much i meant to her so she was sorry if i didnt know and this would probably make no sense but she was tired of keeping it to herself bc shes the luckiest person alive for having met me and that it was gonna be so hard because shes so difficult (shes not) and her anxiety is difficult but that she literally spent every night thinking about me and of buying plane tickets to come see me so that she could be with me. then she was like “im sorry if this is uncomfortable to you and you can just ignore it but i think im in love with you and this is over text and not romantic at all (it was the most romantic night of my life) but you’re asleep (i wasnt) and we arent together but i want to be one day” and until this i was Trying to fall asleep and then i checked my phone that kept RINGING and died a thousand times over and started to answer and she sent other texts saying “i’ve never felt this way about anyone before i’m so in love with you its fucking ridiculous and this is gonna be so complicated but fuck i want this so bad / i’m sorry it took me so long / would you move to new york with me?” and i was This Close to literally fucking exploding like. how the hell was this happening how was it not a DREAM. so we talked and i obviously said i loved her too and eventually she asked me out and thats still probably the best night of my life. other highlights: “i’ve loved you way before august 9th so jot that down” and “off topic but i love you / you’re honestly my other half” and, after i said “you cant make me laugh its 2am”, she answered “i’m going to make you laugh for the rest of your life so help me god” and thats my favorite thing anyone has ever said to me probably and so far she’s kept her word.

anyways we got back together and then she told me that she never even told her friends she broke up with me??? bc that way she could keep pretending we were still together???? literally like sjdksndk imagine being this loved. i dont have to. anyways she wrote poems abt me sometimes and her christmas gift for me was gonna be a book with all her poems and she called it “what we owe to each other” because of the good place (remember how i said it’d be relevant later? its later) bc like she said that when we were watching tgp together on rabb.it thats when she realized that she Really Truly liked me like For Real. and the inscription on the book was going to be “to the girl i love / and what i owe her” and. yall. i cry. anyways one of the poems had a huge impact on us. heres the story:

and she got them but we broke up before she got to mail them to me. what happened was she had some mental health problems and she said she couldnt give me what i needed at the time but knew i’d still give her my all bc thats just how i am and she thought it wouldnt be fair so she broke things off to work on her mental health. she said she would need some time before we could be friends. the last thing we said was that we loved each other. this was in like november 2018, and we didnt talk for months. i actually tried to move on this time after a while, but it didnt take. and then i gave up for good. havent tried since. but anyways, then, on march 11th, 2019, i had my first day of college back in my home country, and we have this “pranks”/games that seniors get to do to the freshmen, and one of them required eggs, and they asked us to paint them, so i panted mine as iron man bc it was easy, but c LOVES iron man. like. LOVES. like in a Whole New Level of loving. once when we were dating she said she loved me more than tony stark and i was like. shook. like she tattooed “T.S” on her ankle after him. u get the point. she loves him very much, its adorable and endearing and i love it. anyways. so i sent her a picture of it saying like “you dont have to answer this but i made this for my university and i thought you would like it” and she answered and IMMEDIATELY something clicked and we talked and talked and talked and it was never weird or awkward or uncomfortable. it never is with her. its incredible, i cant explain it. i Know shes my soulmate like thats the ONLY possible explanation for this kind of connection. its unreal. anyways. we became friends again! all was well.

then one beautiful night she drunk texts me sndjkajs she sends me so many texts and says it sucks that we live so far away and that she saw my posts (in this particular case, one that said something about like. when she talked about love now, was it about someone else?) and she said that it wasnt. and then she went to sleep and i only saw the texts when i woke up and i was DYING bc we had a 4 hour difference and it’d take a while for her to wake up. when she did, we talked and she said she wasnt over me and was scared she might never be, and even though we were still gonna stay friends, it was nice to know that she still loved me. ok so fast forward a bit more and i was starting to wonder if she’d moved on again, when she finds out her best friend had a crush on her, and that conversation ends up with her saying “it was 100% platonic for me / sorry if thats weird i just wanted you to know that” and it was NOT weird it was GREAT NEWS bc i was Hella jealous of her best friend and at first i wondered if they were dating and anyways the fact that she wanted me to know that was a pretty good hint that she still had feelings for me. ngl im still somewhat jealous of h (c’s best friend), but thats just bc im an insecure lil bitch and also bc they get to go out and do stuff together that i cant do with c bc of the distance, yknow? but anyways. then she went on a graduation trip in mid to the end of june and she bought me a magnet. just. out of nowhere. i cannot stress enough how Incredibly unexpected this was. so much so that i actually convinced myself that it meant she was over me????? literally. what the fuck. anyways we named him together and coincidentally (or bc of soulmate powers. who knows) we both had the same favorite names. i still love that.

okay so then we go to july 29th, 2019. first of all theres one of my favorite interactions Ever which was like after i was venting about something and i was thanking her and i said “you’re always here for me” to which she answered “nowhere else i’d rather be” and i still think thats peak romance and i will take no criticism on this. anyways so then she sent me a poem that she wrote based on a song i’d sent her (the song i called “heaven is a place” and its the BIGGEST mood for being in love and i sent it to her bc it was how i felt about her so her writing a poem about it?? literally the best thing ever. love it) anyways it was a beautiful poem and i cried and got very emotional and kinda went too far in my compliments (aka being very obvious about my romantic feelings) and then i was like oh no sorry if i made u uncomfortable and she was like. “you have NEVER. EVER EVER EVER EVER made me uncomfortable” “you’re the only person on planet earth i am comfortably myself around” and “there’s nothing you could ever say that i wouldn’t wanna hear” and anyways it was just very good and romantic conversation even tho we were just cough cough platonic hashtag gal pals hashtag no homo ✌️ and then she was like ok wait. i need to talk to u abt something. and in short she said she was waiting for us and i was like well what are you waiting for exactly? and she was like idk?? for us to accidentally bump into each other in new york in a few years?? WHICH WAS LITERALLY WHAT I’D DAYDREAM ABOUT BACK IN JUNE 2018 BEFORE SHE CAME BACK OKAY so anyways we had a Great conversation and said i love you about a thousand times each and she decided she was gonna buy tickets to come see me. and then she dID like TWO DAYS LATER. lichrally. queen of impulsivity but in the best way possible.

—————

ok quick edit here cuz i forgot to say that when i found out she was coming i asked for my mom’s help to make a necklace pendant for her from scratch. my mom works with prosthetics so she has the material to make jewelry and back when c and i were dating in 2018 i had made this lil design for a necklace that had the moon and the ocean (bc duh) and i was gonna give it to her for valentines day in 2019 but we broke up before that so i didnt get the chance, but when i found out i was meeting her i knew i had to. so i made the necklace in wax, like this:

and my mom took it to her work and heated it up to melt it and keep the shape of it to fill with silver, and this was the result:

i gave it to her when she got here and she wore it while she was here and it made me so happy. ok edit over

—————

ok so we kept being like couple-y but not officially in a relationship bc we didnt want to make her anxiety worse. also at one point she was like “so about the ‘i love you more than the moon/ocean’ thing, since we BOTH love BOTH of the moon AND the ocean, i think its only Fair if we update our love declarations to ‘i love you more than the mocean’ bc its mix of both but thats not a word, buT its pronounced exactly like ‘motion’. therefore we should both start saying ‘i love you more than the motion’”. so now we have both the wonderful, romantic, original version, and the NOT ROMANTIC AT ALL DO U HEAR ME C??? version :) and after this day she always started with the WORST!!!!!! version, and i always started with the Only Valid Version, but we’d still answer each other’s ofc because. well. thats love i gues?? it sorta goes like this though: her: i love you more than the motion / me: i hate u / me: i literally hate u so much / me: i Also love you more than the motion

but anyways she was coming to visit me but the plane ticket wasnt for my home country it was for where i was going to university at (a new university, i was starting over) and when i first got here on this campus, i didnt have a working phone number for this country, and i wouldnt be able to access the wifi for 3 days, so i had no way of talking to her. it was TERRIBLE and i missed her more than anything in my LIFE but when i got wifi (after CRYING to the people here bc theyre the most unorganized uni ever and i was already very overwhelmed and stressed) i immediately called her and she’d sent me over 100 text messages dkfjssjks it was amazing, there were two (2) videos of her singing (which is like. objectively the best thing in the world, and the song was rlly romantic and i love it sm when she showed it to me for the first time she said it made her think abt me), a poem, AND a HUGE text with “i love you” written like. a THOUSAND TIMES. seriously i have a gif of it opening and scrolling bc it was so long that the text wouldnt show up directly on the chat screen and u have to click on it to see the rest. i’d never felt more loved in my entire life by anyone ever. anyways so then it came the day for her to get here and i had to wake up at 5 am to go get her at the airport and the uber was like $40 but who CARES it was the best day of my LIFE and i got there 20 minutes earlier bUT GUESS WHAT SO DID SHE (hashtag just soulmate things) then we facetimed the entire time while she was walking through the airport and getting her luggage and then she hung up to walk to the door where i was and we hugged for like 5 minutes and we were totally in people’s way and also almost fell but it was the best thing in the world and i never should’ve let her go. but, we had to go home, so i did. and we spent 4 days together and im not gonna go into details bc this is already too long but u can always send me another ask about her visit if ur not a coward. also i bought her a hoodie from my uni and whenever she wears it i just. die. in short, those days were the happiest i’ve ever been. this campus res had never felt like home before that friday and it hasnt again since that monday, but i swear to god, during those 4 days, this was the only place i could possibly belong.

anyways then she left and i cried for the entire uber ride home and then i cried all day. lmao. also when she was here she gave me the poetry book, the magnet, and the bracelet. still wear the bracelet every single day and i love it more than anything. but then personal stuff happened and we kinda stopped being couple-y again and we’re just friends now but before new years i asked her if she still loved me and she said yes and she said she’d tell me if it changed so ✌️✌️ im assuming it hasnt. even tho my brain is a bitch and everyday its like. today. today is the day. this is when its gonna happen. buT yknow we’ve spent months before without even talking to each other and we got through that still in love, so i mostly ignore it. and tbh i know that actually like, even if we grow apart now (god forbid, but still) we’ll find our way back to each other eventually. like, i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again: nothing, not even the universe itself, can convince me that shes not my soulmate. and even if it turns out i’m not hers, loving her is still the greatest honor i can think of.

another edit: also i started drawing recently and the first person i’ve ever finished drawing was her and also (surprise surprise @c since you’re already seeing all my feelings anyway) bc of my second drawing i almost missed the deadline for one of my midterms (which was a take-home test) bc instead of writing it i spent the entire day before the deadline finishing the drawing which was a secret valentines day gift (secret as in she didnt know it was supposed to be a gift, she thought it was just a drawing inspired by a quote that she loves) and i finished at 2 am but shes 3 hours behind so for her it was still 11 pm which MEANS it was still valentines day so it still counts, i win, lesbian rights!

#mine #l #answered #dont rb #i dont think anyone will but this is personal and i dont want to risk it getting out #i wanna have this bc i love telling people this story and next time someone asks i’ll just send them this post

2 notes · View notes

letstalksymphogear · 5 years

Text

Symphogear, EP. 2

Last time, on Symphogear!

An adorable little girl, stood up by her date for a reasonable explanation, jams it out with her favorite pop duo, caught unawares that they are also a monster-fighting syndicate experimenting with the power of sound (the power to make you dizzy) to activate an ancient historical relic. Shit goes south as the jams prove to be too powerful, guaranteeing tragedy amidst an otherwise baller concert. Hibiki is rescued by The Bigger Of The Lesbians before she self-destructs to make sure the entire threat is neutralized, leaving The Smaller Lesbian sad, yet still incredibly gay. Years pass as our protagonist goes to Music School, for Music, to bunk it up with her girlfriend as she tries to figure out what the hell happened. Her prayers are answered when she tries to rescue a little girl and is promptly cornered, activating the same outfit The Bigger Lesbian that saved her had on. Gungnir Dattos all around, The Smaller Lesbian loses her shit as everything goes downhill from there.

Now, where were we?

...right. The piss beacon.

And the person taking the piss.

Hibiki has nary a clue what to do. Symphogears don’t actually come with manuals, you see. They’re sort of a “close your eyes and wing it” kind of experience. In Tsubasa’s case, it’s quite literal.

“FUCK that was COOL AS SHIT, tight as FUCKING HELL”

Take pity on this face. This is the face of someone who’s last memories will be a confused lady wondering why she is suddenly part machine.

“imma save you widdle kid”

Something to note about this show is that all the fighters sing while fighting. Hibiki is no exception, even after being confused about what the hell she’s doing. It helps that her voice actress is a professional singer.

It helps that every voice actress here is some sort of professional singer.

This picture basically summarizes why Hibiki is cool despite being so goddamned dumb. She’s angry, and she’s gonna protect some kids even if she dies doing it. Kanade would be proud, if she wasn’t too busy being dead.

No shit!

Have you ever watched the original Sam Reimi’s Spiderman? Like, the very first one? You know all those awkward scenes about Spiderman learning how his powers work? Hibiki basically does that under crunch time. There’s a long segment about how she’s forced to figure things out while protecting a kid and Not Dying.

It’s going pretty great.

I can’t believe she’s secretly Steve Urkel.

“cannot FUCKING believe that girl my girlfriend saved managed to GET HER HANDS on her FUCKING CLOTHES that I WANTED to ENSHRINE IN A MEMORIAL to her how the FUCK did she do that cant BELIEVE i have to SAVE HER IDIOT ASS because she just CANT EVEN DO THAT-”

Tsubasa, preparing herself as a contender for the World’s Angriest Lesbian, barrels through the Noise in her motorcycle...

...which she smashes directly into the Noise. It does nothing.

Tsubasa has many a motorcycle to smash. It’s a testament to her dedication following her aesthetic.

She fueled the tank completely before smashing it in.

Tsubasa... is petty.

As Tsubasa t-poses to assert dominance (a woman ahead of her time, this first aired in 2012), she comes down ready to kick some ass and vent some frustrations. And frankly? She’s all out of ass.

“oh my god she’s even hotter up close i cant believe it”

“fucking knock-off outfit looks like it came out of a bootleg flea market”

You don’t need to know what happens next, because you already know what happens when someone shows up with a fucking sword ready to sing about their dead girlfriend and the conflicting feelings about seeing her armor pop up again on someone else.

Murder.

Lots... and lots... of murder.

“we’re so fucking useless why do we even exist”

After Tsubasa finishes what could only be described as a massacre, we’re treated to how people clean up the aftermath.

“hey, you know, make fun of me all you want, but at the end of the day, im the one holding the vacuum cleaner, and you’re literally turned to dust, so”

Even this little girl knows shit’s about the go down. Got the tea and everything.

This is one of the minor characters of the series. She works for the 2nd Division. Who is the 2nd Division? You’ll find out soon.

“i didnt die! fuck yeah. today’s a good day.”

“OH WAIT NO-”

Hibiki learns that her outfit unsets after a while, like bideo game. Who catches her mid-fall?

Her new best friend, of course. Don’t be fooled by this look. Tsubasa tragically suffers from resting angry face syndrome. It is, unfortunately, incurable.

“i hate how cute she is”

Hibiki reminds her that this is technically the second time Tsubasa has saved her, which in the large scheme of things, seems incredibly innocuous for someone who escaped a major tragedy many years ago. Unfortunately, time doesn’t move forward for Season 1 Tsubasa. Not for quite a while...

The funny part is it doesn’t even hit her initially. She never actually saw Hibiki personally during that moment, so she actually doesn’t even have a clue what she means.

Look at her. Look at this clown. How could you hate her. Look at that smile.

All the survivors are always forced to write NDAs about what they saw. This grows to comical levels at times, given the scale of what happens eventually. It might as well be the world’s biggest open secret by now.

“aight homies looks like i gotta go home, the wife’s gonna be lonely an-”

Oh.

“sorry holmes but you’re going to gay baby jail like the rest of us singers”

Hibiki’s face is riddled with guilt. The guilt of someone who just saved a little girl. How dare you, Hibiki. This is what you get for doing The Right Thing.

And so she’s taken to “jail.”

“sorry pal but you literally turned into a huge weapon and you have no idea how to use it so!”

And so, Hibiki was never seen again...

Alright, so she really isn’t going to jail. She is genuinely being taken into custody, though. To be honest, this kind of handcuff procedure is sort-of ridiculous for someone who literally just saved children, and you could probably bribe her to join them with a 10 piece chicken dinner, but hey, fuck it. 2nd Division has protocols, and that is to arrest people.

“i cant believe i was a fan of a narc all this time”

The school has a giant elevator that goes deep into the Earth. Also, look at that symbolism. Hibiki’s the only one looking at her own reflection. Deep.

Thanks, Tsubasa.

The interior decorator for this elevator is wild.

Tsubasa forbodes where they’re all going as some ominous, strange, and evil place where joy and happiness die. Where good feelings and innocence are destroyed, and hope is crushed and ripped at the seams.

As it turns out, Tsubasa is just an angsty piece of shit.

So here’s the situation:

The 2nd Branch, which are the people in charge of poking relics until they glow with the power of music to study and harness the power of as weapons to kill the Noise, live in a several mile deep high tech basement of an all girl’s boarding school dedicated to music. This is because, for the record, that the girls recruited to this school have the habit of being a little bit attuned to these relics. Hibiki, a newly christened Gear user, is now being recruited into this organized by Genjuro.

“i never got this kind of party when i was recruited”

“thats because nobody liked you, hans”

“im skipping my soaps for this”

“fucking hate my twin brother hans”

“she?????? gets a party??? SHE. gets a party. I DON’T GET A PARTY. SHE... GETS A PARTY? and i dont get a fucking party. i was literally BORN into this job. NOBODY gives me a damn party. this MORON who CLOWNS AROUND with her SUBPAR SONGS. gets a party. oh my god. oh my GOD. FUCK. FUCK!”

“if this is what its like to get arrested i gotta be gayer and do more crimes”

“I’m not actually surprised. I’m just pretending to be. I’m just really not good at pretending to be surprised.”

“fucking hate this family, im gonna eat all of hibikis cake and cry in my room”

Remember: This show first released in 2012. Ryoko? Trendsetter.

Ryoko’s screen is very dirty and foggy. Don’t ask why. Don’t even remember why I pointed this out. Just forget this point completely.

Hibiki understands that handcuffs just aren’t fashionable.

Genjuro casually explains that they’re the fictional japanese equivalent of the NSA, all while doing magic tricks. Truly a man of many talents.

Tsubasa is already plotting how to vent about all this in her diary, which she addresses as letters of Kanade every time she writes in it.

Genjuro and Ryoko introduces themselves as everyone else apologizes to her, except Tsubasa.

Ogawa also intro- yes, I’m recycling a picture- introduces himself. He’s pretty cool, too, and serves as Tsubasa’s ninja bodyguard, butler, and all around mentor. We never get a backstory on him, and likely never will. It’s best to keep it that way; it only adds to the mystery of who the hell this guy is.

“weird flex but okay”

Hibiki realizes she’s being recruited, after being told she’s being recruited. Given some brain cells remain in her head, she asks the obvious and wonders what the hell happened to her.

“ryoko, care to explain?”

“well, it’s simple. you’re the protagonist now.”

Ryoko, who has no sense of boundaries, subjects Hibiki to a medical inspection. As creepy as her tone is, its to inspect the state of Hibiki’s newly formed gear.

She’s finally freed from that long winded event and returns home to her wife.

“buddy you smell like shit. and french fries.”

“hibiki. you’re not dead, hibiki. come on, get up. i just cleaned this floor, hibiki. hibiki, please. this is genuinely unbecoming of you. hibiki, oh my god.”

“miku please i learned how to kick ass and im tired and please let me enjoy this nice floor”

Tsubasa does the thing real life Symphogear and all related products never actually bother to do.

“god she’s so gay for her but i know she’d never cheat on me so”

Hibiki ruminates on the day she’s had. This is where the really dumb angst comes in. You see, Hibiki can’t tell anyone about what happened, and Miku, now a civilian in her eyes, cannot know about her alter ego Symphogear antics. Hibiki feels bad about this.

“y u no trust me. y u no tell me troof. im wife.”

After a brief heart to heart Hibiki smiles and snuggles her girlfriend.

They’re gay.

“im gonna marry her knowing full well she’ll sleep through the ceremony. god.”

#symphogear #symphogear season 1

20 notes · View notes

avyssoseleison · 5 years

Note

prompt: dean coming out 💕

1.3k | Warning for slight/implied homophobia

Charlie is the first one he tells. Not just because he knows for sure that she won’t judge him – she proudly came out as a lesbian many years ago, after all – but also because he thinks she might already have some kind of inkling of his sexuality. At least, going by her calm explanations whenever Dean messes up and spouts some uninformed crap about queer issues again, and by the warmth of her smiles whenever Dean talks to Cas – which he never manages to do without blushing these days – or any other guy he might find attractive.

It goes even better than he thought it would. Charlie squeals and hugs him, and thanks him for telling her. He feels nothing but pleased when they sit on the couch and play video games afterwards, their bellies full of pizza and beer, and he doesn’t feel the need to hide anymore how handsome he finds Geralt.

Sam is next. Dean has to do it over the phone, what with Sam being in Stanford and thus thousands of miles away from him, even though he would’ve liked to tell him in person. Sure, he could’ve done so during Thanksgiving, when Sam did in fact come to visit them, but he was too chickenshit back then. Besides, catching a quiet moment during which to tell him, without all the other family members and friends around, was pretty much impossible.

Sam makes a thoughtful noise once Dean’s let the cat out of the bag, which goes on for a bit too long. Right as Dean feels his heart sink, Sam hastily reassures him that he doesn’t mind, that he’s just been taken by surprise. He is completely cool with it, really, it just came a bit out of the blue, and once he slept a night over it, he’s sure he’ll have adjusted. He keeps babbling, thanking Dean for telling him sometime between explaining all about Stanford’s LGBT+ group and asking if there is anyone Dean is interested in. Despite his awkward attempts at saving the conversation, it tapers off quite quickly after that.

Dean knows Sam is pretty liberal in any way, knows that he means it when he says that he is cool with it and was just taken by surprise - even so, Dean can’t help but feel disappointed. For some reason, he expected something… well, maybe not more, but something different. Sam is the great big university braniac, after all, and as far as Dean was concerned, he thought it meant that Sam would just accept it and go with it right away. Maybe the disappointment isn’t even directed at Sam alone – maybe it’s because Dean always thought that, in academia at least, there would be easy acceptance of this. If not there, where else could he ever hope to find it?

When he calls Charlie afterwards, she tells him it’s normal for people to be open to different sexualities in general, but some simply don’t expect close relatives and the like to be anything but straight. She is sure Sam will come around – more than he did – and that Dean shouldn’t worry.

The next day, Sam sends him a picture of a photo of when Dean was a kid and staring completely slack-jawed and with flushed cheeks at an Indiana Jones impersonator. His caption says, “Already so obvious back then!”, and although everything feels a bit awkward and stilted at first, Dean takes it as a sign of Sam’s goodwill and a step in the right direction.

He texts back, “& yet u didnt pick up on it. should i call stanford & tell them what kinda hacks they accept?” and laughs when Sam just replies with an emoji that is sticking out its tongue.

Then comes Cas. Dean can’t look him in the eye while he tells him; not because he’s ashamed of it – not that much, at least, not anymore – but because he feels it would reveal too much, not just about his sexuality, but about what it means in relation to Cas, about Dean’s feelings for him. Cas is as calm and non-judgemental as Dean knew he would be. Just like Charlie, he’s been out for some time now, and thanks Dean for telling him in a warm voice. When Dean finally musters up the courage to at least glance at him, he finds a small smile on Cas’ lips and shining blue eyes.

That right there is precisely the reason for why Cas wasn’t the first person he told – because he was the reason Dean realized and accepted that he wasn’t all that straight, and wanted to come clear about it in the first place. Not for Cas – not primarily, at least –, but it is difficult to keep kidding yourself about being straight when you wake up in the middle of the night with sticky underwear, pleasant tremors wrecking your body, and your best friend’s name still on your lips.

Nothing much happens after Dean tells Cas, though. Not right away. They keep on talking and joking as usual, maybe just a little lighter than usual, that bit more honest. Finally unguarded.

His mom takes the news with a stoic face. She nods as he talks, doesn’t reply or react in any way, and afterwards just sits in silence for a long time. Dean expected as much. She comes from a different generation than him – and hell, even people from his generation aren’t necessarily all that open when someone’s sexuality doesn’t meet the norm –, so he tries not to take it personally.

When she finally breaks her silence, she asks a few questions about Cassie and Lisa and all his other ex-girlfriends. Asks whether his feelings for them were real and– and he has to explain to her again what bisexuality means, and that he loved all of them, still likes women as a whole, just like he likes men.

She doesn’t thank him for telling her, but she hugs him as he leaves, pats his cheeks and tells him that she’ll love him no matter what. And that he shouldn’t tell John.

He doesn’t tell John. Not because his mom told him not to, but because he hadn’t intended to do so from the get-go. As an ex-marine and all around self-perceived men’s man, Dean has no doubt John would come all the way from Kansas to thrash him if he knew, or at least disown him. He’d certainly never talk to him again either way.

Dean tries not to mind as much. Sure, he does mind, on some level, but he knows there is no way in hell John would accept him as he is, just like this. Maybe someday, should Dean find a man instead of a woman to settle down with, to marry, he might tell him. Pretty hard to hide being married, after all. It would be John’s decision, then, whether he wants to open his mind or keep it closed.

Briefly, Dean considers that he might do John an injustice. That John might accept him, perhaps, or tolerate him, at least. He doesn’t dwell on it for too long, though; if he told John, he’d know for sure, but there’d also be no way back, no way of unknowing. He’s not brave enough for that yet; maybe he will be in the future, perhaps with someone kind and strong by his side, to help him come to terms whatever might happen if he told John.

For now, he chooses to remain ignorant. Cas tells him that he is right to do so, that he doesn’t owe anyone an explanation, that he doesn’t need to share this part of him with anyone he doesn’t want to share it with. Dean knows as much by now – in the same way that he knows that there are some people he wants to share it with. Starting with those who thank him for it.

#perlukafarinn #miriam writes #dean is bi #destiel #bi!dean #spn #fanfiction #sorry if the format is a bit messed up #i copy my stuff from google docs into a draft on ao3 to keep my italics but that seems not to work as well anymore lol #besides that i actually like what i wrote #anonymous #stay safe my friends!#homophobia cw

115 notes · View notes

wildfangz · 5 years

Photo

@liliithvatore tagged me in that simself thing thats been goin around DAYS ago but here it finally is! also thank you for the tag this was fun :-]

I tag @slythersim @thelurgoyf @seoulchii @weicyn @solitasims @daisydezem @raha-plays-the-sims if they want to do it & anyone that just wants to do it in general! message me and I’ll even @ u directly if u want.

anyway lets DO THIS shitload of questions under the cut u’ve been warned!!!

1. what is your name?

julian

2. what is your nickname?

jewel, jules

3. birthday?

oct 26th

4. what is your favorite book series?

percy jackson and the olympians will probably always own my heart & soul

5. do you believe in aliens or ghosts?

yes & yes. tho i do think a lot of alien sightings and conspiracy theories and what not are bullshit

6. who is your favorite author?

maggie stiefvater probably? also cornelia funke but its been years since ive read anything by her so i cant be sure BUT i loved inkheart & the thief lord so much

7. what is your favorite radio station?

ummm when i listen to the radio at all i kinda just switch between two rock stations and our popular music station.

8. what is your favorite flavor of anything?

blue raspberry !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tasty and i love a blue tongue

9. what word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful?

cool. or bitchin’. i play it simple

10. what is your current favorite song?

hands like houses - revive

11. what is your favorite word?

roulette and inhibition which i never get to use either as much as i want !

12. what was the last song you listened to?

emarosa - givin’ up ! its a bop!

13. what tv show would you recommend for everybody to watch?

the new she-ra on netflix its so good. and gay

14. what is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down?

moana. its also like the only movie i dont have trouble getting thru despite how many times ive already seen it

15. do you play video games?

16. what is your biggest fear?

idk... being inherently unlovable i guess n ending up alone? also spiders !

17. what is your best quality, in your opinion?

im fairly open-minded and laid back. Unless someones being like, purposely nasty or something I generally don’t get defensive or aggressive. also a lot of little quirks that piss others off dont bother me im very u do u as long as its not actually harming anyone and ive had people tell me this makes it easier to open up to me so thats probably my best quality....

18. what is your worst quality, in your opinion?

....at the same time though i do get very sensitive when faced w/ criticism even if its of the fair variety when its not phrased really gently for various reasons and i dont like that. especially since I have a tendency to not even talk to people about it. I’ll just immediately start distancing myself. also other than that i think overall I have a really high tolerance lvl but if you cross that line I hold a grudge like a motherfucker

9. do you like cats or dogs better?

cats! dogs are good too but cats are a lot easier for me to handle...and quieter generally but even when they’re loud cat sounds dont get to me quite as much as barks do

20. what is your favorite season?

autumn but im starting to really like summer for some reason? wack :/

21. are you in a relationship?

nope

22. what is something you miss from your childhood?

the lack of responsibility, probably. that sounds real bad lmao but for me its like...I know I’ve grown in various ways over the years but I also feel like so many of my experiences, my trauma, my mental health has held me back and I don’t think I’m mentally where I should be for my age. so all the responsibility of adulthood is just..really overwhelming for me sometimes, even though ive been given a pass from certain aspects of it and the rest is pretty simple its the idea!!!!

23. who is your best friend?

my ex

24. what is your eye color?

25. what is your hair color?

26. who is someone you love?

my mom

27. who is someone you trust?

not really anyone rn unfortunately...would like 2 work on that

28. who is someone you think about often?

are my OCs a fair answer because i am always thinking about my babies.....

29. are you currently excited about/for something?

my favorite webcomic (that also has two of my all time favorite characters in it) just came back!! the artist disappeared back in 2015 like the day after I binge-read the whole fucking thing & i was so disappointed but its BACK and 2018 has been redeemed

30. what is your biggest obsession?

sims probably! i could talk about anything relating to it for hours

31. what was your favorite tv show as a child?

there were so damn many its hard to even think and figure out the most notable ones...i really, really liked teen titans though?

32. who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone?

my ex, again

33. are you superstitious?

not terribly so but somewhat. I take certain things as signs and I mean I do believe in astrology & such to a degree

34. do you have any unusual phobias?

i used to be afraid of mirrors but thats all i can think of and its not even a thing anymore...the only other thing is tornadoes but i dont think its unusual. but it definitely sucks for me ‘cause i live in tornado alley!

35. do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it?

behind it....like taking pretty pictures and dont like ppl capturing my image 2 film

36. what is your favorite hobby?

sims.....also singing!!! and drawing!!!! video editing!!!!!!!!! the works

37. what was the last book you read?

The Dream Thieves....havent finished it though because last time i went to read it a spider was lying in wait and im traumatized

38. what was the last movie you watched?

coco i think???

39. what musical instruments do you play, if any?

drums, various other percussion instruments, and violin mainly

40. what is your favorite animal?

ferrets!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

41. what are your top 5 favorite tumblr blogs that you follow?

uhhhhh @bratsims @liliithvatore @cabsim @wildlyminiaturesandwich @keysims pls dont feel bad if i didnt include u these were just the first to pop into my head and ive been following some of them since I first made my blog!! and have kept up with their stories completely and enjoy them etc check them OUT !

42. what superpower do you wish you had?

shapeshifting!!! dysphoria? gone. ugliness? gone. want to morph into a fucked up clown and scare people when they realize all the classic clown features are a real actual part of my face? possible!

43. when and where do you feel most at peace?

chillin’ at the pool in summer during the part of the day when no ones there.... swimming is always relaxing 2 me then i love just resting under the sun and drying off afterwards especially since we have a little pond nearby and i can hear the water! its nice

44. what makes you smile?

always and without fail? interacting with anyone i have a crush on. i’ll look like a dope the whole time

45. what sports do you play, if any?

i used 2 play basketball a lot. Like not seriously but it was a thing

46. what is your favorite drink?

dr pepper and monster energy (original flavor) pumps through my veins at this point. we love a carbonated beverage

47. when was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody?

two years ago for my ex and I’s first year anniversary... I never got it mailed but I did at least take a picture of it (with included caption because my handwriting is atrocious). i was very up front about being a romantic and see heres the PROOF

48. are you afraid of heights?

nope! very excited by them actually

49. what is your biggest pet peeve?

i cant stand passive aggressive behavior. my stance is either get over it or quit acting like a bitch because otherwise im just going to ignore you thats the scorpio way (in all seriousness I really, really do recommend not putting up with it and ignoring it until they decide to be up front with you. it can be exhausting constantly reading into conversations and its not healthy for you or them. if they have something to say they need to learn to talk about it properly, and that lack of social skills is not ever on you)

50. have you ever been to a concert?

yep! i think about....six or so? i love them...which is really funny im autistic and EVERYTHING about them should freak me out and they do in other circumstances but at a show i just live for it

51. are you vegan/vegetarian?

nope! ive thought before id like to go vegetarian...but i couldnt do it with my health problems. also i love shrimp too much

52. when you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?

ive always wanted to do something creative! when i was rlly young I thought a lot about singing and acting and writing in particular...all things im still interested in.... also i wanted to be a dictator ages 4-7 because i told my mom i wanted to be president of the world and make people do what i say and she said “honey thats a dictator not a president”. i then made that known at school and that turned into a situation!

53. what fictional world would you like to live in?

pokemon universe or bust.

54. what is something you worry about?

never being able to do things i want to do or catching up with others because of my disabilities

55. are you scared of the dark?

yes but a reasonable amount i think

56. do you like to sing?

yes :]

57. have you ever skipped school?

yes i used to play sick a LOT and as my parents caught onto it id even go all out to convince them. i was good at school but i hated it so much

58. what is your favorite place on the planet?

dunno! malls maybe i love shopping and looking at material objects i wish to own

59. where would you like to live?

oregon! portland in particular thats been my dream for a few years now

60. do you have any pets?

a cat! he lives with my dad & grandma though...hes grown up there and likes going outside so I felt bad about taking him with me when i moved out but anyway this is him hes fat and stupid and i love him his name is coffee

61. are you more of an early bird or a night owl?

night owl because my rhythm is all fucked up but in my heart....an early bird...if i get a good nights sleep i’ll be up early yacking your ear off and so excited for the day

62. do you like sunrises or sunsets better?

sunsets are prettier...but sunrises feel more refreshing

63. do you know how to drive?

nope ! im gay !

64. do you prefer earbuds or headphones?

headphones. better sound quality also discourages people from talking to me slightly more

65. have you ever had braces?

nope! but i need them

66. what is your favorite genre of music?

post-hardcore maybe?

67. who is your hero?

every trans person living their truth and being open and loud about who they are past present & future. the worlds not particularly kind to us and our existence alone is considered a radical act, so its always given me hope to see others refusing to pretend to be someone they’re not in this environment and I’ll always have mad respect for that

68. do you read comic books?

i read manga and webcomics...ive always wanted to get into superhero comics but the amount of issues and different versions is ridiculous and makes it inaccessible 2 me

69. what makes you the most angry?

i mean its hard to pinpoint what makes me angry the MOST...but a contender is definitely how some people feel free to treat others with cruelty and think its their god given right to deny or attack someones existence in some way, & how acts of kindness, even the most basic are branded as liberal bullshit or whatever....it goes against everything i was taught growing up

70. do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book?

real book! electronic device can be easier but....rough on the eyes after a while and nothing beats the real thing for me

71. what was your favorite subject in school?

language arts...at least when we did creative writing stuff

72. do you have any siblings?

two older sisters & an older brother that passed away years ago but. still my brother u kno

73. what was the last thing you bought?

mocha frappe baby!!!!!

74. how tall are you?

5′4″

75. can you cook?

a little bit....not as much as id like to though but im learning

76. what are three things that you love?

storms, cheesy breadsticks, and cat purrs

77. what are three things that you hate?

unnecessary rudeness, being talked down to or generally treated like im stupid, grapefruit which is the worst thing on this list

78. do you have more female friends or more male friends?

female i think?

79. what is your sexual orientation?

im the big bad promiscuous bisexual your parents warned you about

80. where do you currently live?

oklahoma. gofundme campaign to get me out

81. who was the last person you texted?

my friend jojo! just Now!

82. when was the last time you cried?

yesterday afternoon but im a changed man now thats behind me. i will cry about different things soon

83. who is your favorite youtuber?

the mcelroy brothers. also super best friends play. matt, pat & woolie are all great tbh

84. do you like to take selfies?

depends on whether i feel ugly or terribly dysphoric that day or not

85. what is your favorite app?

ummmm....love live school idol festival ive been playin for years its an addiction

86. what is your relationship with your parent(s) like?

dad = bad mom = okay. theres some issues that strain it but its not too bad

87. what is your favorite foreign accent?

i have no idea what the fuck australians are talking about half the time but i dig it anyway

88. what is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit?

Italy, Greece, Germany, Japan, Mexico, various other states (ive only been out of state three times. twice to texas and then once to kansas. for five minutes)

89. what is your favorite number?

6!! 26 also

90. can you juggle?

ive always wanted to but alas.... :-[

91. are you religious?

i suppose...but im rlly not into organized religion

92. do you find outer space of the deep ocean to be more interesting?

space probably theres so fucking much of it man!

93. do you consider yourself to be a daredevil?

not to brag but sometimes i eat my mcdonalds hamburgers cold from the fridge so you can figure that one out yourself B)

94. are you allergic to anything?

pecans. not deathly allergic though so catch me eating turtle pie anyway!

95. can you curl your tongue?

nope :[

96. can you wiggle your ears?

nope :[

97. how often do you admit that you were wrong about something?

usually as soon as i realize....unless someones being real smug and annoying then i might be stubborn about it

98. do you prefer the forest or the beach?

ive never been to the beach but i love her!!!

99. what is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you?

probably that you have to look at your accomplishments differently when you’re disabled or just struggling, to not be so down on yourself because its a fact that what might be a mole hill to someone else is a mountain to you and you have to judge yourself accordingly. Like maybe you weren’t able to clean the whole house, but washing the dishes and tidying your desk doesn’t usually get done but you did it. That that should be celebrated because while it would also feel good if you did more, you still did something and thats great all things considered.

100. are you a good liar?

sometimes, really depends what im lying about and if im like....into it at all. If my guts against it for whatever reason I’ll have trouble

101. what is your hogwarts house?

i always get slytherin or hufflepuff! usually with like 1 point difference

102. do you talk to yourself?

i am talking to myself right now as i fill this out

103. are you an introvert or an extrovert?

extrovert mainly! i used to think i was more introverted but now i think a lot of exhaustion when theres any comes from me just going the extra mile and actively trying to read people and pick up on social ques.... if I just chill im fine

104. do you keep a journal/diary?

nope...ive tried but i just cant keep up with it so i do the next best thing. shouting into the void on the internet to a bunch of strangers

105. do you believe in second chances?

depends on what you did the first time. Some people just don’t deserve taking that risk imo...but i can be a little guarded so maybe thats a bit too harsh

106. if you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do?

turn it in, unless there was no identifying things in it & it was found somewhere kinda random. Then I’d maybe hold onto it unless my gut challenged that

107. do you believe that people are capable of change?

absolutely. i mean thats all we do throughout our lives is change and evolve...that being said I think extremely drastic changes are maybe not entirely impossible, but extremely rare, and the residue of the former self usually sticks around in some form

108. are you ticklish?

yes, dangerously so

109. have you ever been on a plane?

nope

110. do you have any piercings?

one day hopefully!

111. what fictional character do you wish was real?

asra from the arcana.....even if he wasn’t my boyfriend thats just a dude u could chill and eat some pomegranates with u know. Before I downloaded the app my friends kept telling me he was made for me and he really was he ticks like everything on my Favorite Characters Feature List except villain but he has that particular allure & attitude i like so much in villains so thats not a single point off hes perfect

112. do you have any tattoos?

nope...one day! hopefully!

113. what is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far?

accepting my genderqueerness and bisexuality definitely. Self Love hasn’t been perfected just yet but that was such a huge step in the right direction

114. do you believe in karma?

yes! she doesn’t get shit done as much as id like however

115. do you wear glasses or contacts?

glasses. not contacts yet because my eye doctor is a bitch

116. do you want children?

I do....just not sure if id be a good parent. Its really important to me if I had a child itd be for the right reason and I could raise them well in a healthy environment & be able to take care of all their needs yknow

117. who is the smartest person you know?

probably my friend jojo

118. what is your most embarrassing memory?

one time i looked outside and the sunset was really pretty and i wanted to get a photo of it so i walked out.....and stood like right by the street so there weren’t trees in my way...and then i realized mid-pic 1) i am not wearing pants & my shirt is full of holes 2) id been depressed for days so my hair was a tangled mess. I tailed it back inside so i didnt even get a nice pic it was blurry!

119. have you ever pulled an all-nighter?

120. what colour are most of you clothes?

black i didnt even have to think about that one

121. do you like adventures?

they are pretty swell

122. have you ever been on tv?

a few times when i was little. always photobombing the news reporters 4 what i thought would eventually lead 2 fame & fortune

123. how old are you?

124. what is your favorite movie quote?

this is technically lyrics to that lil song in moana at the end but

“ They have stolen the heart from inside you. But this does not define you.”

hits me hard every time! emotional impact? i know her

125. sweet or savory?

sweet!!!!!!!! gotta balance out my bitter somehow

#tag meme #about #srry if theres any weird grammar or spelling going on half of this was written when i had a monster headache #and was doing everything but laying down!!!!

12 notes · View notes

barelylivinblog · 5 years

Text

We Went to Canada to See A Lot of Water

After driving through what seemed an endless route to the north pole, my boyfriend and I were crossing Lake Erie and heading across the border into Canada towards Niagara Falls.

Traveling there wasn’t as bad as I’m letting it off to be, but being in a car for six hours definitely put a toll on my childlike soul. I spent almost an hour of the ride harassing my boyfriend by wearing his sunglasses and being ridiculous, which I now realize was a lot funnier in person than written out.

If there’s anything I can tell you about taking a road trip, it’s very simple: Pack Snacks.

Had my boyfriend’s mother not supplied us with a sandwich bag crammed with two breakfast bars, a nutty butty, and two bags of popcorn, I would have perished. We made the mistake not to stop when we saw food, and when I say food, I mean the shady gas stations along side the highway to nowhere. This was the best option because after so far along when we were actually hungry there was NO WHERE to eat until we got into Buffalo. At that point it made no sense to travel into buffalo when we could just wait until we got into Canada.

Starving, we hurried along to our hotel and then quickly settled to eat at the Apple Bee’s right down the street from our hotel. Had we not been so hungry, I’m sure we wouldn’t have settled for the most American option. However, as my boyfriend said, it was easier knowing we were going to a place where we knew we would enjoy the food.

BUT.

To my horror upon looking at the menu: Canada’s Apple Bee’s DOES NOT SERVE BONELESS WINGS. I am an expert when it comes to American Apple Bee’s because if there was one close to my house I would eat there every day. The menu at the Canadian one was, to my surprise, much smaller. They didn’t even offer two for $25.

Another thing I picked up on quickly was how expensive everything was. Even with the conversion I ended up spending double my anticipated amount just from eating and sightseeing. The only free part of the trip was seeing the Falls themselves. My boyfriend even had to pay to park his car for the weekend.

Anyways, after paying what seemed like a million dollars for a meal at the facade that they called Apple Bee’s, we headed down to the Falls for the first time in the dark. In order to get there you had to walk down this steep hill (which continuously killed me when we hiked back up it) and walk under this bridge that still had been decorated for Christmas. The whole city was still decorated for Christmas which was nice considering our trip was a “Christmas” trip.

Once you got so far down the hill there was a picture view of what I believed to be the only Falls. You see, there are two waterfalls in this area: The American side and the Canadian side. In my head the two falls were facing their claimed countries, but it turns out they were both facing the Canadian side.

So I was staring at the American side, lit up by colorful lights, and thinking that this was the big sight to see. To be honest, I hadn’t even realized what I was looking at until my boyfriend said that the Falls were straight ahead. They, especially in the night, looked like projections of water. It was unreal.

And then I saw the Canadian side, or the Horseshoe Falls. Which, again, looked like a large projections. My eyes could almost not adjust to what I was seeing because it was so unbelievable.

After the magic of the falls and being showered in positive ions, my boyfriend and I headed back to our hotel. Below is a list of things we discovered about our hotel:

1. You cannot use bath bombs in the hotel tub or else they will charge you $350.00

2. Channel 4 is the fireplace channel

3. The vending machines only take dollar coins, HOWEVER, the dollar coins they have set out for you are a three dollar charge.

4. The pillows were garbage.

5. Hotel IHop was delicious but I paid 13.00 dollars for a meal I get at Denny’s for 4 dollars.

6. The curtains that would make sense to be able to move DO NOT move.

7. The elevator will smell like weed.

8. The hotel gift shops snacks are very pricey. We lucked out after I spotted a general store directly across from our hotel and got snacks for a little bit cheaper. It was a good business, still selling stuff obnoxiously priced but not as pricey as the hotel.

Our second day we went behind the waterfalls, and climbed over to Clifton Hill in search for something to do. We ended up at a glow in the dark indoor mini-golf course. It was a good way to waste some time and I think was worth the admission price. I was worried it was going to be crowded but everyone was good about waiting their turn which made it a cool experience.

That night, however, my boyfriend took me to the casino.The casino was really dazzling to the eye, but once you looked past the fancy decor and colorful flooring, it was scary how hypnotized some people were. I watched people who looked like their lives had been sucked out of them from hitting a button and betting away a lot more money than one should to a computerized slot machine. I had never been to a casino because in America I’m not old enough, but here all I had to do was show two forms of I.D. and I was stamped and sent on my way.

I ended up not gambling because it was a weird concept to me, but my boyfriend did. He was laughing and carrying on and all the older people were giving us dirty looks. It was fun to watch him, but now I fear he’s hooked (not really, I just like to give him a hard time).

The best part of the casino was the buffet. It was beautiful inside, the food was all very good, and it was one of the cheaper meals we had. We ended up eating there twice because of this, so I strongly recommend that if you are in a touristy area where food is expensive, look for that casino buffet.

On Sunday, we explored a wax museum. It was the worst idea I’ve ever had. Like, I’m ashamed to admit that I was the one that suggested it. The museum was about the size of a house, but laid out in a way that made it seem larger. In order to appear this way, each room was sectioned off by doors rather than archways. At one point I felt overwhelmingly claustrophobic because we were in a small room with about five different figures. The figures themselves looked to be completely real or like creepy dolls -- there was no in-between. I thought this uneasy feeling of being scared that one of them was going to come to life was just me and my overactive imagination, but once leaving I found out that my boyfriend was also pretty spooked about the whole experience.

So to calm down we went and sampled beers. The servers never carded us or looked at us strangely, which made me uneasy as well but also reassured that I wasn’t being illegal. My boyfriend and I argued for which beer was best, but to be honest I don’t really care for beer at all.

Speaking of servers and overall employees, they will never be paid enough to deal with rude tourists. I watched numerous encounters where tourists were being unreasonably rude to staff members and if there’s any advice I can give you about traveling: be nice to the workers and they will usually give you a nice experience. It’s the famous “treat others the way you would like to be treated.”

When Monday morning came, we headed back to the States and I took a well needed nap while my boyfriend played Smash Brothers to make up for his lost gaming time.

Overall, Niagara Falls was beautiful. I assumed that because of winter there wouldn’t be as many people, but it was pretty crowded over the weekend. However, we never ate a bad meal or experienced anything negative (other than the spooky wax museum but we have erased that from our memory). My only regret is that we didn’t explore as much as we should have. It was very easy to do things that we were familiar with instead of taking risks. My prime example of this was the Apple Bee’s, and although the buffet was amazing, next time I would enjoy to explore what Canada’s menu has to offer, food and experience wise. The most exploring we did was nearby, and we typically stayed close to what was familiar to us. The farthest we went was to a Hershey Chocolate World only to discover that it didn’t have the Hershey Factory Tour ride that our beloved Hershey Park has. In the long run however, we did a substantial amount of walking around and had a very relaxing trip.

To summarize: pack snacks, have a lot of spending money, and enjoy the view because it was the best part.

1 note · View note

leahbrenner · 6 years

Text

and now for the second nerd ..,, a fuckn nervous wreck who likes computers & action movies !! can u say #relatable

( alycia debnam carey, cis female, she/her ) —— oh, look! it’s our favorite camper, LEAH BRENNER. their file says they are EIGHTEEN years old and reside in the POSEIDON cabin. i hear they’re actually EARNEST and QUICK WITTED, but they can get kinda WEAK-WILLED and EXCITABLE. rumor has it SHE’S WATCHED ALL THE MISSION IMPOSSIBLE MOVIES FIVE TIMES OVER. but hey, what do you expect? it’s in their blood.

introducing this FUCKING NERD !!! go and look up nerd in the dictionary and her picture is there

adopted by a jewish couple from the edges of memphis in tennessee and was fuckn all over the place as a child, has adhd & dyslexia like most demigod kids but obvs didnt know it was cause she was a demigod ! her mum was a school counsellor and her dad was a chiropractor, has two older brothers, one of whom is also adopted

uhH as a kid of the big 3 there were always monsters kinda lurkin on the edges of her life but everyone always dismissed it as leah having an overactive imagination and she just kinda ended up believing it and going w it

as she got older though it became more and more unsafe wherever she went -- switched schools a bunch of times and had to leave every one & it made her really upset cause she was doing her best !!!! and she rly wanted to learn !! but she just kept bouncin all over the place

until finally a keeper found her when she was 11 and realized she was a demigod and she ended up at camp half blood and wow ?? she was honestly so happy to have somewhere she belonged and somewhere she could stay that she didn’t even care nobody would claim her ( spoiler alert: it’s cause poseidon didnt wanna own up to having a kid ) and she had to stay in the hermes cabins for years until percy forced the gods to claim their kids

she was originally only staying for the summer but then when she tried to go back to school, now that she knew it was SO much worse & she almost died -- only managed to survive cause she jumped into some random person’s backyard pool and the colchis bull that was after her couldnt swim so she just treaded water for 3 hours ( she looks back on that like ?? how did i not realize poseidon was my dad ??? ) until eventually it got bored and left

anyway after that she was super spooked and kept her weapon with her ( a pair of fighting knives ) until she could go back to camp half blood to stay. after that she stayed year round. her family moved to new york ( the mainland tho, not the island that’s too expensive ) so she could visit them for short periods of time like for chanukah, purim, birthdays

anyways yeah shes a fuckn nerd. loves action movies like indiana jones, james bond, john wick etc and video games ( cries over the endings but she’d never admit it ) and recently she got rly into computing & programming and stuff !!! she just thinks it’s so cool like all those nerdy badass computer hackers in films even tho she knows it’s not actually like that and her dream is to one day go to mit for like computer science & video game design, once she figures out how to control her fckn powers and control the mist and keep monsters Away

sweet gal who just wants everyone 2 b happy !! this means she can sometimes be a pushover or a people pleaser, esp cause poor girl has anxiety and gets really fuckn stressed out when she thinks people are disappointed in her, will go to crazy lengths to make sure they aren’t ! honestly its exhausting ..... someone save her from herself

very very smart, very quick witted but she tends to jump to conclusions. talks the way she thinks -- a mile a minute, jumping from one topic to the next w lightning fast speed !! dont get her started on anything she’s passionate or excited about -- but honestly she gets excited about everything so ? -- she’s already talks a lot but when she’s excited she just becomes an absolute rambly MESS and her accent comes out really thick and good luck trying 2 understand her !!

since she grew up totally landlocked she didn’t realize how much she loved water -- like, pretty much the extent was that she liked taking long showers sdfjlsdljfs -- but now that she’s at camp halfblood she can’t get enough, it really really calms her anxiety and she feels so much more at peace & secure in the water. kinda overwhelmed by her powers tho and tries not to use them if she can

bisexual, gets crushes way too easily and acts like a fuckin Dork around anyone she finds attractive ok???

yeah wow.. i luv her ...... pls come & luv her with me

#( ooc ! )#fleece.intro

5 notes · View notes

sainadazai · 3 years

Text

When your crush is angry all the time

Ch. 2

Ch.2

DontCryDontCryDontCry

°•○●○•°•○●○•°•○●○•°•○●○•°•○●○•

Y/n pov

First day at U.A. high. This is actually going to be so sick, think of all the boys and girls and weird quirks. Best of all I get to meet boom boom. Hopefully I don't do that thing where I think about him so much I forget we don't know each other, that would be embarrassing.

I smile to myself as I approach the tall building with students flooding in and out. A couple of kids seemed to notice how strange I looked, I didn't have the uniform yet because my mother refused to let me have it. She told me I'd have to get it from her during school so she could show her students how dope her kid was.

Not sure if I should be flattered though. Mom always compliments me like I actually did something to have the power I have. When really all I did was not die. Usually the interaction goes -

"Oh my god, honey you are so fucking cool, look how good you control your quirk, you train so hard!"

"Yea mom, it's crazy how after psychopaths try to breed you at ten years old you learn a thing or two about combat."

Then her face falls into a deadpan to cover her guilt and we move on. Sarcasm is honestly one of my all time favorite coping strategies. Like you can even make it better by not making any facial expression so people's minds are just fully fucked.

My outfit couldn't feel more out of place right now, but I obviously notice the profuse blushing of boys and girls as I make my way through the halls of U.A. If my bestie was here I'm sure people would be fainting, since she makes a habit of dressing in fishnets and chains. I guess I could wear clothes like that but im tired most of the time. So if I don't have to dress up, I won't.

However that doesn't mean I still don't look good. Well, at least I think I do...

This morning I was lazy so I just threw on Baggio black jeans, a cropped tee, and a baseball jersey that I got from when I flew with my dad to America. We watched the game together, but I kinda zoned out the whole time. Of Course I added a couple chains just in case I get to be on top of somebody. Hehe call that ✨funcional fashion✨

Dw of course I took a picture in the morning to post on insta and brag to my old friends about how I got out of that hell.

I rushed in a door that said 1-b just before I heard a bell go off. The door shut behind me with a loud thud the second the bell stopped. That is one way to get attention, I guess. I didn't even care to take in the faces of the students in front of me. After all, I was only here for one reason. I skimmed the room trying to find that ominous glare, but to no avail. My first thought was that maybe he wasn't in class today. That was before I peeked out the window of the door and realized there were more than one hero classes here.

If he is in the other class, I'll just have to be in there too. Is this stalking? Yes. Will it end badly? Probably yes. However, do I have anything to really lose? Nope. Not a single thing.

"Katsuki Bakugou." I figured I'd say it out loud with a Stern face, just to see if the teacher would be intimidated enough to take me to him.

The teacher and the rest of the class visibly tensed at my stare, but apparently I wasn't intimidating enough.

"Whatever business you have can be settled after class. Now, students, this is the newest addition to class 1-b y/n l/n."

"No."

"Pardos me Ms. L/n"

"I said no, im not gonna be an addition to your dumb class" I mocked him

He then sent me a very odd face, in which he pursed his lips but simultaneously glanced at his students in fear. I suppose they might not be pleased at my rejection, but that's irrelevant. I'm not here for them.

"Oh, so you think you're too good for us!? Huh?"

"Yes."

"Class 1-a scum can have you, you vial worthless, dumb, fat, stup-"

Some angry blonde kid was interrupted by an aggressive bonk on his head. I glanced to his side and made eye contact with a girl, she was quite pretty, but not prettier than boom boom.

"Cool, okay so i'm gonna go to the other class then....sir?"

"Pft, you wish. Sit down. Now."

"I literally didn't ask dude...sir."

"Adding sir doesn't make what you're saying any less disrespectful, now sit down."

I pouted a bit in realization that he wasn't as dense as the police usually are. However that didnt mean I wanted to listen. Plus if I got in trouble, that might be even more fun.

"Again. No."

Suddenly I felt a hard push on my back, I fell to the floor and felt a foot pushed against my back.

"Nooo.Mom, please. Not right now."

"I came here to teach historia you brat."

She took her other leg and swung it back, leaving all her body weight on my back. Then launched it forward to meet with my side just as she took her top foot off my back. I felt the contact of her boot on my bare side and felt the tingle of what I assume is pain rattle through my left side, to my right. Only to be cut off when a new sore of pain spread through my back.

That was what I assumed was my body slamming against the front wall of the class. I kept my eyes clenched shut the whole time, only flinching the impact of the wall. I bounced right off and landed on the floor.

"Yea...okay," I said between groans.

*timeskip*

Lunch

Midoriya pov 😗

It was finally lunch time after miss midnight taught us history. It wasn't my favorite subject, but I still look at pretty good notes. I'll be sure to read over them later in case we have a pop quiz or something.

This lunch period is kinda more exciting than usual because I heard rumors that there is a new hero course student, and new additions don't happen often, so he is probably really good.

After getting my food from lunch rush, I rushed over to my table where me, uraraka, iida, and todoroki sit everyday.

I plopped the food down onto the table and followed by sitting down and saying hi to my friends. It didn't take that long into their strange conversation about water volcanoes and cheese for me to zone them out in search of the new face.

I don't really know everyone at U.A. that would be crazy. Still, I feel like I have enough knowledge to spot an obviously new face. Plus he is probably with the 1-b students right now. I scan over the whole lunch room, eager to say hi, but I don't see any new guys, or any new faces at all.

Maybe the rumors were just rumors. That's really a bummed, I was hoping I could get yet another cool quirk to write about in my journal.

Most of lunch was spent with my friends talking about weird things called memes (he calls them me me's) and me trying desperately to find the new guy.

Until lunch was just about to end and in came a girl out of uniform, but she seemed to hold one in her hand. She looked fairly (tall/short) and had pretty (h/l) white hair. It seemed almost to glow as she walked in. To me the whole scene played slow motion, her hair bouncing up and down as she walked and the sports baggy jeans risking and falling. They teasingly revealed her belly button every other step as they lifted and sunk.

I sorta wished she would have just put her uniform on because I feel pretty stupid for staring at her belly button.

Her face was pretty too, catching the light above on her cheek bones(im sorry if u dont have prominent ones, just take out bones and leave it as cheeks) making her seem shiny.

I felt my face heat up uncontrollably before I felt a nudge on my thigh.

"Hey deku, I heard that the new girl is actually a midnight daughter. She is in class b, and I guess this morning midnight kicked her against a wall." Uraraka whispered in my ear, loud enough for just the people at our table to hear.

Now that I think about it, everyone was whispering.

"Midnight's daughter. Wahhh! Then she must have a quirk like midnights. If she does then it'll be hard for our classes to keep up with her. Midnights quirk is strong and considering the already rising testosterone level in the boys in 1st year, we could all-"

"Shut up you damn nerd"

I cut off my rambling and looked up to make eye contact with kachan. Why is he even over here? Is he here to beat me up? Or to get ochako?

"Katsuki, that's not nice, plus he is right, what if she can seduce us."

Kachan only furrowed his brows, however me, iida, and even todoroki a little went red with the image in our minds.

"Izuuukuuu"

"Baby, why do you keep looking at my belly button"

"Do you wanna show me how cool your quirk is"

"Nn Gg plus u-ultra"

Oh no. No. No. No. No. Well....wait. no.

I took a quick glance back at the girl who had halted her movements. She seemed like she was frozen and had a big, wide smile plastered on her face. It was pretty cute. Like a little kid looking at candy.

It almost felt like she was looking at me, but I didn't wanna wave, in case she wasn't.

"Oh my, holy fuck, I knew this would pay off!!!!" She yelled, not even minding that the whole cafeteria now had eyes on her.

She began running over to ...my table? Again it was slow motion, and again I kept looking at her stomach. I guess I don't see girls in short shirts often. I felt myself un-blush forcibly just for, you know, protection from bullies.

"Boom boom, shit, I Promised I wouldn't do that. Fuck it. Hi, im l/n y/n and you are boom boom. Wait...."

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING POOP YOU FUCKING EXTRA!"

My eyes can't pick who to look at and they keep going back and forth between the girl and kachan as they ....communicate.

"No I called you boom boom." She dead panned

"THE FUCK, YOU THINK YOUR CLEVER ON SUM SHIT?"

"Well, I am, and I do." Again the girl seemed completely serious.

"WHO THE-"

"Wait, let's go back. You call people extras? Like in a movie, so then you think your the star."

"I AM THE FUCKING STAR YOU WORTHLESS PIECE O-"

"Babe, that's so much better! You're conceited too." She gushed

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING BA-" bakugou almost launched forwards but ochako grabbed his arm to pull him back.

"You are kinda loud, but I guess that makes sense. Hey! I know, tell me something about yourself"

"STOP FUCKING INTERUPTING ME!"

"Oh, my bad hon, go on." She looked up at him like...oh. He is the candy she was looking at.

"Fucking hell, im not your babe or your hun, extra. I'm not telling you shit about myself. Fuck you think this is, the sharing circle?"

The girl didn't speak for a minute, her face was quick to go from anticipating, to confused. What was she confused about?

"I have a new idea" she instantly had a change of aura and her serious face remained, with one eyebrow cocked.

She lifted her hand and pointed a finger at bakugou, then slowly walked forward.

"How. About. You. Tell me what you are sharing..." she winked "circle is."

I noticed that Ochaco , who was now a coward behind the kachan , flushed red. I don't think she was for the same reason as everyone else though. I could tell she was trying to be angry, but seemed to be failing. Bakugou seemed to notice this too.

I wonder why this girl is flirting with him right now, and what was with that nickname.

"H-hey. Um do you two know each other or something."

"No" they replied simultaneously.

"I-um..huh?"

"Oh, right, my bad. Hi, I already introduced my name, but I should explain. You are the attractive fire quirk boy I saw at the sports festival. When I saw how angry you looked, and the fucking DOPE aura you gave off, I begged to get transfered here. Got in on recomendaciones so I could meet you." She said not seeming to care about how truly creep that all sounds.

"THE FUCK, YOU STALKER!ILL KILL YOU!" kachan screamed, subtly grabbing onto his girlfriend's hand, I suppose an effort to comfort her without being 'nice'

"Hm? Oh...yeah. Well, you could say I am like a stalker. However, for a stalker i'm very pretty, so if you could just ignore that..."

"YOU AREN'T PRETTY BRAT, GO SUCK A DICK AND GET OUT OF HERE!"

"Well, that is what I came to you for..." she, again, had a serious aura change and a cocked eyebrow, this time retracting her finger to put her hands in her pockets.

"I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND YOU SLUT"

"Woah, woah, hey, calm down"

I get that he is trying to be protective, but calling a girl a slut is never okay. I wish I could fight back more, but it's not every hero- like to do so without talking first.

"SHUT UP NERD"

After that small exchange everybody's attention fell back to the girl. I think her name was y/n. She looked a bit defeated, I could tell she had a crush on kachan, even if it was small. Her face is blank but usually in situations like this girls get all...tears eyed and. Oh no.

I stood up right next to her.

"Dontcrydontcrydontcrydontcry"

"Huh?" She looked over at me confused.

"Dont cry?"

"Why would I cry?"

"Because he has a girlfriend" Ochaco seemed to be making her way out from behind kachan, also a bit nervous for if y/n was to get sad.

"Oh, uhm, I guess i'll just have to be the better person for him or something?" She ...asked herself.

"I've never done this before, but the look in your eyes has a fire behind it, and I wanna see it up close. I'm not gonna give up, we only spoke this once and that's definitely not enough." She made eye contact with him the whole time. Even stated her words like fact. Now, it may have just been me, but he almost smirked.

"That's all, see you in class later!" In class? She is in 1-b? Did she transfer?

Ochaco was now side by side with bakugou looking furious at the new girl. While I eerily peeked up at him and his scary red eyes. They did a quick, up and down movement...I don't think anyone else could have seen it, but I did. Then he went down again and stayed there a bit, he was looking straight past me, so I turned.

There I saw...the new girls butt! He? He checked out her- oh no. Why do I feel like this is the start of something terrible for me....

¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤○¤

Hello new readers, it is me...the autor. Anyone who is ready for this is my favorite bc I don't get many ready. Also sorry for the horny midoriya, if I'm making the characters not innocent, he isnt an exception lmao.

°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°▪︎°

0 notes