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jule1122 · 3 years

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Maria Fic - Good intentions never good enough

Happy Maria DeLuca Weekend!

For Day 2 Alien Heritage/Visions of the future, I have a angsty little fic that imagines there could be something more than just the funeral vision driving Maria in 3x02. The theme is her grief and continued mourning of Rosa so keep that in mind before reading.

Good intentions never good enough on AO3

Thank you to @angrycowboy for betaing this and making me feel like it might be worth posting. Title is from “Get Out” by CHVRCHES

Summary: Maria thought her first vision was of Kyle. She was wrong.

“When did you have your first vision?” Kyle asks, pen already poised to record her answer.

Maria thinks about the image of Kyle picking up his keys, and the fear that flooded her when she realized what was happening. She opens her mouth to answer, but the scans Kyle insisted on taking to set her baseline glow blue in the corner of her eye, and she remembers something she can’t believe she ever forgot. Maria’s hand goes to her neck, reaching for a necklace she no longer wears, and she lies, “I don’t remember.”

Kyle looks at her like he knows she’s lying, but he just marks something down on her chart and moves on to his next question.

She does her best to answer the rest of the questions, but she’s eager to leave. Maria cuts off Kyle’s well meaning lecture on putting her health first because no matter how passionately he argues, she had no intention listening.

When she gets to her car, Maria turns the music up and rolls down her windows. Her plan is to head home before she has to open the Pony and relax for a few hours, but she isn’t surprised when she finds herself parking in front of Rosa’s grave.

Maria no longer feels silly about visiting a grave she knows is empty. Even knowing Rosa is alive hasn’t been enough to stop her monthly visits. She pretends she does it for appearances sake when Liz asks her, but the truth is, Maria’s still mourning.

“I’m sorry,” she says once she finishes pulling weeds. Maria sits in the grass and pulls her knees up to her chest. “I didn’t know.”

She could drive to the Crashdown and apologize in person, but that Rosa isn’t the one Maria failed. Maria failed the Rosa that should have been by her side for the last ten years. The one who would have known Chad was a loser as soon as she met him and made sure Maria didn’t waste her time on him. She failed the Rosa who would have hung out with her on the roof after their shifts so they could bitch about shitty tips and assholes who thought they had a right to grope them just because they were servers. Maria mourns the Rosa who would have helped her look for Mimi the first time Maria realized her mother couldn’t find her way home and would have cried with Maria when she signed the papers to put Mimi in the home.

Rosa’s a miracle Maria never expected, but her life froze ten years ago, and Maria’s didn’t. The last Rosa remembers Maria was still free to dance all night and was trying to figure out what she wanted to do with her life. All that has changed, and Rosa wasn’t there for any of it. It’s taken time, and even though Rosa finally feels like her friend again, Maria can’t help missing the Rosa who would have changed along with her.

And now she knows it’s her fault. Maria tries not to think about the months after Rosa’s death. The days blended together in a haze of grief and exhaustion. She’d forgotten about the nightmare she thought was brought on by weeks of not being able to sleep without remembering Rosa’s funeral. Now she remembers waking up, startled and breathless, the image of Rosa floating in water, lit in blue, her eyes closed and hair floating behind her, already burned into her mind.

It wasn’t a dream, she realized as she sat in Kyle’s office. It was her first vision, one she had night after night every time she closed her eyes. Maria hasn’t thought about the vision in years, but she closes her eyes, blocking out the sight of Rosa’s grave, and forces herself to remember. She recognizes the hazy edges and the limited perspective she’s come to associate with her visions. If she could have seen more, if she’d known to push herself maybe she would have been able to make out the pod that held Rosa for all those years. Maybe she would have found the cave where Rosa waited, forgotten for ten long years. Instead, she tried not to sleep so she wouldn’t have to see it again.

But it wouldn’t go away, not until one night, tired of losing Rosa over and over again, she’d crawled into Mimi’s bed, tears streaming down her face.

“What’s wrong, baby?” Mimi asked after she wiped away Maria’s tears.

“I know Rosa’s dead,” Maria sobbed. “But I see her every night. She’s drowning, and I can’t save her.”

Mimi smoothed her hair back from her face and looked into her eyes before answering. “Some things can’t be fixed, not now and not by you, Maria.”

“Mom, I know it’s crazy, but I feel like she needs me,” Maria confessed.

“Oh, baby, Rosa’s not drowning, you are.”

Maria’s breath caught because she knew Mimi was right. Rosa was dead, half the town was calling her a murderer, hurling ugly words at everyone who loved her. Mr. Ortecho had boarded up the Crashdown windows twice already and had given up trying to clean off the graffiti. Liz was gone, and even though Alex hadn’t said anything, she knew he was leaving too. Whatever hope he had was fading, every time she saw him, he was more withdrawn. Maria felt alone and lost.

Mimi continued to stroke her hair until Maria calmed down. She was almost asleep, when Mimi asked, “Maria, where’s your necklace?”

“On my nightstand,” Maria answered. She didn’t like to wear it to bed because it got tangled in her hair.

“Don’t take it off again.”

Something about Mimi’s voice sent chills down Maria’s spine despite the comfort of her mother’s embrace. “I won’t,” she agreed quickly.

“That’s my girl,” Mimi’s voice softened. “It will bring you good dreams, I promise.”

A bird screeching above her breaks Maria out of her memories. She’s been sitting there long enough she’ll have to hurry to get to the Pony on time. Maria stands and stretches the stiffness out of limbs. “I’m sorry,” she whispers again, brushing her hand across Rosa’s marker as she leaves.

Kyle’s angry, and Maria doesn’t blame him. Their argument after her last scan still lingers between them, and being knocked out isn’t helping her case. But she’s too tired and her head hurts too much for her to really make him understand. All he sees is the damage she’s willing to do to herself, unable to believe the answers she might get can be worth it.

Maria can’t tell him how she’s haunted by Rosa’s ghost all over again, that when she’s not trying to remember every detail of the funeral, she sees Rosa floating in the eerie blue light. She tries to remember Mimi’s words. Recent years have taught her to look for the truth of what Mimi says even when it sounds like nonsense. Maria couldn’t have saved Rosa back then. Even if her vision had led her to the pod there is nothing she could have done. She didn’t know about Max, and he wouldn’t have been strong enough to bring Rosa back to life even if she’s known to ask.

Everything happened the way it needed to for Rosa to be saved. But Maria can’t help feeling like Rosa had been asking her for help, and Maria ignored her. Now someone else needs Maria’s help. Someone is in that coffin, begging Maria to save them. She won't fail again. So convinces Kyle and Max to meet her at the Crashdown, but keeps her plan to herself.

Maria’s legs shake as she climbs onto the ledge of the roof. She wants to listen to Max and Kyle, to get down and find another way. Maria’s never been so scared in her life, and she knows she needs to be if this is going to work. She turns her back on Kyle and Max and closes her eyes.

Rosa’s floating in the water, hair billowing out behind her. Her eyes are closed and she drifts farther away, toward the blue light. Maria reaches out, but Rosa’s fading away. So she jumps.

#mariaweekend2021 #mariadelucaweekend2021 #rnm fic #my fic #maria deluca #maria's visions #grief/mourning #maria feelings about Rosa's death #rnm 3x02 fic

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thewingedwolf · 3 years

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@monstersandheartache when I was rewatching the other day I was struck by how Joanne has a tendency to focus in on class when she’s frustrated - her “with the French ambassador’s daughter” comment just drips with elitism, and Mark’s equally smug “the rabbi’s daughter” comment is him snarkily putting his foot down - I can respect your intelligence but you are not better because of your upbringing, and Joanne seems to pick up on that because she never makes another shitty comment about Mark’s class status again. In the movie, she makes the comment about squatter’s rights and you see Roger sort of roll his eyes at the idea that they’ll ever win a case like that, and that moment coming from Roger also seems to imply “why would anyone side with me, a positive recovering drug addict, when Benny and Allison are much more respectable?” And I can’t remember exactly how it comes up in the movie, but her “it’s less than brilliant” comment is also a little pointed. And that is not to say that I think Joanne is a bad person, or deserves the way Maureen treats her because that’s ridiculous. But it seems obvious to me that part of Maureen’s problems with Joanne are that Joanne can be a bit elitist when she’s frustrated and that’s a very valid issue to have, especially when Maureen and all her friends are poor as fuuuuuck. But on the other hand, I can see why Maureen would be attracted to a civil rights lawyer who does not care about appearances despite Joanne being uptight.

There’s a bit in the DVD commentary, I can’t remember if it was Adam Pascal or Chris Columbus who said it, but they point out that at the end of La Vie Boheme, you can see Maureen casually tell Joanne she loves her and that it’s Maureen in a nutshell - she’s passionately loud and carelessly affectionate. Can we critique the fact that she gets the least amount of focus in Rent? That she doesn’t apologize in a truly meaningful way onscreen/onstage and it’s just implied that she attempts to reign in her emotions, her temper, her flirting to make the relationship work with Joanne? Yes, of course. But acting like only the bad parts of Maureen exist is not how critiques work.

And that’s what drives me UP A WALL. So many critiques tend to boil down to “they should just stop being poor.” In the context of the 2010s and 2020s, I think people wonder where all their money goes but in the context of 1996, it would be more obvious that their money goes towards getting very expensive medication for Roger, Mimi, Angel, and Collins. Altho it should be obvious now because hello Shrkeli or whatever that little rat man’s name is, but I imagine it was more obvious in the 90s. It’s never spelled out but like - they talk about AZT, about buying it at little booths at a Christmas market, likely black market, so many times during the musical. Being positive can’t be divorced from their poverty, nor can Collins’ sexuality, Mimi’s addiction, Maureen’s protest work, Angel’s gender identity, even the comment from the cops during Christmas bells is striking - the everyone mocks holiday songs but here they are with “I’m dreaming of a WHITE CHRISTMAS” is just. Lil pointed. Jonathan Larsen isn’t holding your hand in a power point explanation of axises of oppression partly because this is a musical, there are More Important Things Happening Like True Love And The Revolution, and partly because - this was his everyday life. He trusts you’re not a fucking idiot lol. Maybe he trusted too much.

#this is a lot of text to say ‘stop being mad that they’re poor’ lol #replies #monstersandheartache #rent

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collecting-stories · 4 years

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Clinic - Roger Davis

A/N: Just a RENT drabble because I recently watched a boot of the 1996 opening night performance.

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The Coventry Church on Avenue B totted signs claiming that ‘all were welcome’. Maureen commented, on passing the signage, that some friend from The Ecstasy Club told her there were churches like that in Vegas...for strippers and prostitutes to find Jesus and get off the street.

“They don’t offer you help just the ‘good word’ of the Lord.”

“And that only helps when you’re out of candles.” Joanne had remarked, not too fond of the outreach ministry.

It played more like a wolf in sheep’s clothing, trying to blend in with the community while preaching about the sins that existed on the streets it called home. The only benefit it offered came in the form of the free clinic and soup kitchen it set up on Thursdays and Saturdays. The clinic prescribed medication for those dealing with any number of illness, including but not limited to an HIV positive diagnosis. When Roger’s medication ran out Mark mentioned that Maureen had mentioned the place.

“Free drugs?” Mark had joked, fiddling with his camera equipment and not sparing Roger the opportunity to cut in a witty comeback.

Free drugs indeed. The clinic was set up in the basement, where bible study was usually held. The chairs had been pushed around to resemble a waiting room and dividers had been put up to give patients a small sense of privacy. It was more than they usually got. The room wasn’t the nicest and no amount of wall hangings with scripture could make it so, but it did the job it was meant to. A clinic on Thursday and Saturday, an AA meeting on Monday, an NA meeting on Tuesday and bible study on Wednesday and Friday. Roger wasn’t much for going out but the necessity outweighed his general disposition toward other people so he left his apartment and found himself waiting, slouched down in a metal chair beside a woman who seemed to smell worse the longer he sat waiting.

When it was finally his turn to go behind the partition, he found a rather pleasant looking young woman there. You didn’t appear out of place in the basement of a sometimes clinic the way the church members often did. And unsure what else to say as he sat in the chair across from you, he felt the need to comment on your not-out-of-place-ness.

“You don’t look like you belong to the church.” Roger gripped the sleeves of his sweater as he heard the words tumble out of his mouth. Not his finest moment, certainly, but he’d had worse too.

You smiled at him like you knew all about his inner turmoil. “Judging by how you phrased that, and the fact that I don’t belong to the church, I’ll take it as a compliment.”

“I just mean-”

“It’s okay, we can move passed it.” You replied, taking a clipboard from the table beside you. It had a simple form on it, one found in most clinics and doctor’s offices. “Name?”

“Roger Davis.”

“Okay,” he watched you check off his name and the color of his eyes before you looked back up at him, “what’s your...actual hair color.”

“Blond.” He ran a hand through the bleached spikes on his head, he’d never grown out of that phase of his life the way he had imagined that he would.

“Any drugs?”

“No.”

“What brings you in today?” You set the half-complete clipboard on your lap and smiled at him like you maybe already knew why he was here despite the list of services offered from the temporary poster hanging on the door.

He was doing well. He’d watched friends die, Angel and Mimi and others in the support group that Collins was still taking him too every week. He wasn’t sure how much longer Collins had. Or himself for that matter but he didn’t like to think about it. He preferred to push away anyone potentially interested just so he wouldn’t have to disclose his status. “I have AIDs.”

“I assume you’ve taken AZT before?” You didn’t miss a beat as you asked him. Though he knew, realistically, that this was a clinic and of course they saw plenty of people coming in off the streets who needed AIDs medication and he was nothing special he had expected the slightest of recoils.

“The clinic I used to go to shut down and I ran out.”

“When did you run out?”

“Well I will, tomorrow.” He replied.

“I can give you a general ‘sample’ dose today, which will cover about a week and then if you come in Saturday I’ll have a full prescription for you. We work with an AIDs clinic in Brooklyn so I have to fill the prescription through them.” You explained.

“So, you just work for the clinic?” He asked, watching you fill out the medical part of his form. His renewed interest in you rearing its head.

“I don’t go to church here if that’s what you mean. I live around here though...I moved in a few weeks ago with some friends.” You offered more information than you usually would but you couldn’t be blamed for it. Roger was thin, sure, and certainly hadn’t slept well in the last ten years of his life, and the bleached hair washed him out, but he was nice looking. Cute in a very 80’s way, in a way that would have your mom experiencing heart palpitations.

“It’s a shitty neighborhood.”

“Thanks for that vote of confidence.” You laughed, better than your smile, you looked so happy. And his chest ached for a moment as he felt bad for being so friendly with you. “Is there anything else you wanted to go discuss?”

“No, just that.”

“Okay,” you nodded and Roger could practically feel the conversation coming to an end. And why wouldn’t it? He’d come in for medicine and you had set up a time for him to get it, an easy transaction, one that didn’t require a lot of time and discussion. But especially one that didn’t require him to linger.

He was slow to stand up, patting his pockets as if he was suddenly going to remember some reason he needed to stay longer. And really, there wasn’t one. He was faced with the same debilitating issue he was always faced with. Or he had always been faced with since April. Mark told him constantly to put himself out there, to meet people, go on dates, don’t sit and wallow. But what options did he have.

And then, suddenly, because he wanted it so much his mouth won out over his head, “my friends are having a get together tonight, if you’re not busy...” he trailed off as his brain caught up. What was he thinking?

“Okay.”

“What?”

“Okay, I’m not busy.” You said, standing and stepping toward the partition, “I am busy right now though...”

“Yeah, right, of course.” He felt like Mark, stumbling over himself. “I can pick you up at your friend’s place?”

“Sure,” you rattled off the address as you checked to see who was left waiting.

“You know I’m-”

“Yeah. I kinda got that.” You replied, lingering just a second more. You did need to get back to work. The woman with the foul smell had been taken into the other partition but you were stuck with the teen mom who thought her baby was coming every other day despite only being four months pregnant. If you didn’t get to her now there was no way you’d be done in time to meet Roger.

“Are you?” He chanced asking. Mimi had been, April obviously was. It was his lot in life no matter how melodramatic Mark told him that sounded.

“No. Some of my roommates are.” You glanced out into the makeshift waiting area as the pregnant girl rubbed her stomach and stared at the wall hangings, “I had better finish up.”

“Right, of course.” He nodded. “I’ll see you tonight.”

“See you tonight Roger.” Feeling a little bolder than usual, whether because a cute guy asked you out or because he looked like the type that might appreciate bolder, you leaned forward and placed a kiss on his cheek. Not too bold but more so than usual for you. He smelled like cigarettes and peroxide and the stubble on his jaw pricked just slightly.

“See you tonight.” He promised, thinking that maybe Mark was right about this place, it wasn’t as bad as the gaudy church signs outside made it seem.

Trying to find a good balance of work and school and writing and preparing for next semester....

#Roger Davis x reader #Roger Davis imagine #Roger Davis fanfiction #Roger Davis fanfic #rent fanfic #rent imagine #rent fanfiction #rent broadway imagine #broadway fanfic #broadway imagine #Broadway Imagines #broadway fanfiction #collecting stories imagine

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merc12-us · 4 years

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02 - Lightweight

Part 1

If you told JJ an hour ago that he would soon be drinking insanely overpriced, but hella smooth whiskey on a twenty six thousand dollar white couch, snacking on crisps and popcorn with one of the hottest girls in Outer Banks across from him .. he would have scoffed. Life was rarely this good to him and he was already having an exceptionally shitty day.

Watching the boy across from her she could tell he was deep in thought, probably wondering how to get out of this situation. She sipped carefully on the heavy crystal glass in her hand, wincing as the sharp taste rested on her tongue as warmth surrounded her tongue and rose to coat her cheeks with a red flush. Amelia rarely drank and when she did it was never this strong but a part of her liked the picture it portrayed.

"So what is the island princess doing at home all alone on a Friday night?" JJ inquired with a low smirk watching her ice blue eyes shift slightly to look down at her glass swirling the amber liquid around.

"Well, Mimi had a date so ..." she trailed off softly with a smile thinking of how excited her friend had been for her date and looking over her phone to check for any updates finding nothing but a few notifications on her Instagram.

JJ had to laugh at the girl she had every opportunity to have a different date every day of the week but the leash her parents had her on was so tight even when they were gone she stayed in unless her best friend, the equally spoiled but much more bratty Meredith Salt, was by her side.

"What bought you over to this side?, usually you try avoid all of it as much as possible" she questioned innocently, JJ's smirk faltered but only for a second, it was true JJ never liked making his way over to figure 8. The outrageously large houses and awful attitudes of the people that lived in them had never made it a place of good memories, the only times he came were to cause trouble or drop off groceries

"Well I originally wanted to score some weed from your brother, I think the company of a pretty girl will do instead" he deflected with a flirty smile his dark eyes shining.

Amelia nodded hoping her cheeks were not as red as they felt as the boy complimented her. "Sorry to disappoint" She was aware of her brothers little side business no matter how ignorant she pretended to be in front of her parents.

It always annoyed her how Miles seemed to get away with whatever he did, a talent she did not posses, Mia could not lie to save her life and even if her mouth was shut her dads could always see it written on her face. Shaking the thought out of her head she stood from the couch slowly, golden warm skin of her stomach peaking out as she stretched totally unaware of the trailing gaze of the buzzed blonde that sat on the couch as she turned to glance down, pulling a wool blanket around her shoulders "I cant pretend to know about the weed but I do know we have food"

JJ's grin almost split his lip as he pulled his bruised limbs up of the couch, never one to refuse free food "Sounds even better" he followed her into the pristine white kitchen he had entered through. He knew exactly where the weed was, a false bottomed trunk in her brothers room held the mother load but taking a seat JJ thought it couldn't help to get some food into him while it was there.

As the girl pulled out a few of the meals her dad had made for her for to eat on their weekend away, JJ's eyes widened as large island was quickly filled eiyh tupper ware containing rice, chicken skewers, salads and ribs were places in front of him "Wow you kooks live the life, I've been living of pizza and pasta"

Amelia's tongue loosened by the alcohol couldn't help but let a quiet "You couldn't tell" out as she glanced over his bare toned arms immediately realizing her mistake as the words tumbled out, turning to bury her burning face in the fridge pretending to look for something as she hoped she would just vanish in the moment.

The boy behind her huffing our a laugh as he shook his head, the usually polite and perfect princess he knew from around the island would never have let that slip but then she did have a few sips of amber liquor and Miles always did complain that she was boring and never partied. He could imagine her petite frame lent itself to a low tolerance "Aww princess I think that's the nicest thing anyone's ever said about me"

Smiling awkwardly as she emerged from the refreshing cold of the fridge with a bottle of water, she tipped back her head gulping the cold liquid down hoping to drown some of her embarrassment.

Thankfully the slam of the front door saved her from having to reply as a rumpled Miles emerged from the foyer his grin being replaced by furrowed brows as he looked between a beaten pouge mid way through stuffing his face to his flushed little sister who looked a little grossed out. Alarm bells would normally be ringing but he knew his sister was about as prude-y as they came and JJ despised the the kook label that the girl wore proudly.

"Miles that's gross" she scowled looking over the red bruising all over his neck, avoiding eye contact with the blonde who fist bumped her brother as he passed nodding in appreciation.

"So JJ what brings you to the dark side?" Miles drawled walking around to steal a stray chicken wing and resting a sweaty arm on Mia which she quickly shoved off, rolling her eyes and replying for the boy "Looking for some of the devils lettuce"

"Ahh well you know the way" He laughed stealing a tub of fried rice and moving up the stairs.

JJ lingered for a moment grabbing a tub of his own as he eyed the girl, Mia smiled moving to grab some painkillers from the counter where her father kept them and slid them across the island finally daring to make eye contact again."For the morning"

JJ warmed as the girl looked straight at him, there was a little pity in her crystal eyes but something else, something more ... "Thanks princess"

Taglist: @lolitstiana

Comment below if you wanna be added

#jjxreader #JJ Imagine #jj outer banks #obx jj #jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #jj #Outer Banks #outer banks imagine #obx fanfiction #obx #obx imagine #jj maybank one shot #rafe imagine #rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader

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nomoregoldfish · 4 years

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Imagine a road trip with Amado (2/2)

Shitty plot twist (plot what plot? lol) and some intimacy I’m desperate for.

When you finally arrive at Ojinaga, a remote border town with nothing exciting. You're not really complaining until a woman greets you at a local restaurant as Amado gives her a big, warm hug, even a kiss on her cheek.

The woman goes "You're late." like they've known each other and they have some secret appointment. You obviously have tons of questions...

"So this is your Mimi? Good for you, Crow." the woman asks, you don't understand a bit. And Amado just smiles at you, an endearing one you can't resist. You just curses you're totally screwed.

You finally meet Mimi, she offers you a warm hug too. You heard about her and Acosta before but still have no idea why Amado brings you to her.

Amado has a file case for Mimi, "He wanted you to have them." It's the legal documents of Acosta's properties in Ojinaga. Mimi asks how Amado knows that, "Some sixth sense? I didn't know you're a woman now." It's a bad joke but Amado doesn't seem to be offended, he just shrugs like he often does. "I don't need to watch your stupid American rom-com to tell how deeply he cares about you. He probably would've bought you some Vincent van Gogh shit if you asked. Remember he crossed the fucking border to fix the roof just for you? Being one of the most wanted drug trafficker in the States, for fuck's sake."

Mimi has this faint bittersweet smile and seems to hold tears. You have so many questions but you let them continue the talk. "Thank you, Amado."

When Amado leaves the table to grab a new pack of cigarettes, Mimi starts to talk to you. She says this is like déjà vu, telling you how funny once she and Acosta had dinner at the same restaurant where Amado was the annoying third wheel, and now she becomes the third wheel. "Believe it or not, he's more romantic than he'll ever admit. He may look cool and laid back all the time, he does care. And I'm glad he finds someone."

Amado invites Mimi to stay for the night but she decides to return to Texas, saying she'll consider the offer of the properties, yet not ready to step into the old ranch again where she and Acosta shared many memories.

It's just two of you again.

You're kind of speechless, after the unexpected and emotional encounter with Mimi. You keep thinking about all the quirky anecdotes about Amado she tells you, how he used to resent being sent to Juárez and couldn't wait to get out, how he was serious about the business but low-key admired Acosta and respected his choice of life. It's not that Amado hides it from you on purpose, you just learn another side of the man you fall for and it's beautiful.

Amado breaks the silence on the ride to one of Acosta's ranches, jokingly asks if you're still mad at him for meeting another woman.

"Tell me more about it. Mimi and Pablo." You put your hand on his thigh, feeling his body warmth. He dismisses it, "It's nothing, just some old lovefools who got caught up in a wrong time, at a wrong place." Yet he cares about them. You can see it from the corner of his eye. Those are people that matter to him, once were part of his life. You're glad he's bringing you in, taking you to this very special trip, even though he doesn't say much.

The Pueblo style ranch house is kept in good condition, apparently Amado makes sure everything is taken care of after Acosta died. "I was gonna show Mimi this is hers now, she can stay here as long as she’d like, do whatever she wants. It's the least I can..." He blurts out. You hold him tight, listening to his heartbeat and insects chirping outside. The night makes him soft. The guy that runs the toughest business against the toughest enemies is in your arms, murmuring his adventures in and across Ojinaga from old days, stories behind the fake gold watch he's always wearing.

You both agree you won't sleep in any of the bedrooms. Just crash on the sofa with some blanket. The night in the desert is nothing like the heating afternoon, you have to hold on to each other's body warmth. (You try to be the big spoon but fail drastically, plus you’re not gonna complain being held by Amado, to feel all the hard muscle and firm body.)

You tell him that you're jealous indeed, because Mimi knows so much about him that you didn't know. You can feel him grin against your neck. He calls you some really stupid pet name. When you're about to protest, he tells you the story behind Tontín—why Acosta called him that and the perfect analogy when they recovered the product referred as "Snow White."

You never feel this close to Amado before. You can't help but turn around to kiss him, and he kisses back, softly.

Different from the wild, hot quickie you had in the car, this time it's slow, yet even more passionate. The kind of sex that brings out-of-body, soul-connecting experience. You have to bite his shoulder to contain the moaning. It feels sooooo good you're almost sobbing.

The next morning you find Amado in the old-fashioned kitchen, preparing breakfast for you both. You smile like an idiot and he warns you he's really bad at it, can't even make an Americano.

You asks him if you'd head back that day, he says there are a few other places nearby he wants to show you if you're interested. That's how you spend the whole weekend in Ojinaga.

#narcos mexico #narcos mexico imagine #amado x reader

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captainsassmanes · 4 years

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Trissshhhhh I have a dialogue prompt for you from that list, and bc you know I freaking love angst. “Take me instead” for Malex

Warnings: This one is heavy. Tw: violence, descriptions of injuries, torture, cursing, Jesse Fucking Manes.

Alex’s vision blurred and he realized, slower than he would have liked, that he could see nothing out of his left eye. He sent out a quick prayer that it was just swelling, nothing permanent.

What that meant, either way, was that he couldn’t clearly see the blows before they came anymore. Maybe a small blessing. Maybe really shitty luck.

“Did Max Evans heal Elizabeth Ortecho from a bullet wound?”

The voice of who he’d learned was Staff Sargent Mitchell menaced in his ear.

Alex was in agony. He’d barely eaten in what he figured was weeks, his stomach twisting in a hunger so severe it ached. He’d been beaten everyday, his injuries never having the chance to begin healing. There was a cut on his arm he was sure had become infected and it sat in the perfect spot to send shooting pains straight up his dominant arm every few seconds.

The first few days, maybe a little longer, of his captivity, he’d fought back: pulled against his restraints, spit in Mitchell’s face, laughed in his father’s. He could still remember reasons to be free again and to keep his mouth shut.

Michael. Kyle. Isobel. Michael. Max. Liz. Michael. Arturo. Mimi. Maria. Michael.

He’d repeat their names when he was alone in his cell, pitch black with the smell of dampness and mold filling his nostrils. He’d pull up memories of them, his brain filtering through them all to feature only the best ones.

Getting high with Maria and laughing for hours. Study sessions with Liz that were more milkshakes and gossip than anything else. Sparing with Isobel, watching confidence radiate off her. Waking up next to Michael, watching the sun light up his tan skin, watching his chest rise and fall, the feel of his chest hair, wiry and thick. The little snores he let out when he slept on his back. The way Michael’s hands felt on his own skin, callused and so full of love.

He never cried from the pain, from the fear, from the threats.

But he’d cried when he thought of Michael.

Eventually, unable to deny it, the reality of the situation set in. Alex figured he’d been held for about two weeks. The meetings with his father, demented, psychological warfare, evolved to insure Alex knew no one was looking for him. No one gave a shit. No one missed him.

Kyle continued to go to work, date his precious, new co-worker. Liz and Max were rekindling their romance while Rosa, who they’d discovered almost instantly, continued to dance in the shadows. Isobel was event planning during the day and, according to sources, blowing up bigger and bigger things in the middle of the night.

And then there were Michael and Maria.

Jesse never hesitated to keep Alex well informed with that relationship. The dates they went on. The visits to see Mimi. The hand holding. The love making. The laughter and the smiles.

It had been just a couple of evenings ago, Alex lying on his back, arm on fire and bleeding from his head, when the tears finally stopped. He pictured Michael and Maria, arms wrapped around one another, eyes locked with wide smiles painted across their beautiful faces. He imagined ease and comfort and simplicity. Kindness and consideration, dedication and loyalty.

“Keep them safe...happy,” Alex whispered to no one.

From that moment on, he tucked it all away; his emotions, his pain, his reactions. He had nothing to give them and refused to yield even an inch.

His eyes met Mitchell’s and Alex made no effort to move. He didn’t shrug or smirk or blink an eye. He would give them nothing.

“What exactly can Isobel Evans do?”

Alex was unmoved. He took the next hit, breathing in through his nose, out through his mouth.

“Can Michael Guerin move objects with his mind?”

Alex felt a small wave of pride as he remained stoic at the mention of Michael’s name.

The next hit knocked him to the ground, the chair he was tied to coming right down with him. The military issues boots hurt like a son of a bitch, Alex feeling his insides bruising with each kick, until he couldn’t help but let out the vomit he’d been trying to hold back.

“Enough, Mitchell. Stand down.”

The kicking stopped as Mitchell took a few steps back and stood at attention. Jesse came to stand before him, feet still and silence filling the room.

“Pick him up.”

When they came face to face, Alex searched. He searched his father’s features for any indication that Jesse felt something, anything.

It was fruitless.

“This is all you’re gonna give us, son?”

Alex raised an eyebrow, not at the question but at the term of endearment.

With a shallow breath, ribs screaming in protest, he mumbled, “you’ve already taken everything. I’m not giving you shit. Dad.”

Jesse nodded, a familiar look of disappointment in his eyes. “Very well.”

The walk down the long hall felt surprisingly freeing. Alex knew this was it, the end of his journey. Jesse and whoever else was working for him had done what they could to get any information out of him. They must have realized he wouldn’t speak and no one cared enough to try to save him.

So it was time.

He wondered briefly if the stories his mom used to tell him as a boy were true. A great warrior may be able to rest in a peaceful, safe afterlife, or maybe reincarnate as human again to try once more, to live another noble life. Or, perhaps, his sins were too great. He’d end up falling into an abyss for eternity or come back but as a roach or something.

Truthfully, he’d never given much thought to death. Losing his leg had changed that a bit but he still did what he could to focus on the present, moment to moment. Maybe that helped him now. He still felt more curious than afraid.

Alex just hoped for peace.

As the small group turned the final corner, he was pushed back as the sound of guns cocking echoed through the space.

He craned his neck, trying to see what had happened, but couldn’t see past the mammoth solider in front of him.

“Stand down. Now. Hands up.”

“Aw, c’mon now, boys. No way to greet a visitor, is it?”

Alex stumbled a bit, head spinning and heart racing. It wasn’t possible. Not now when he was ready.

If he was being honest, there were nights, bitter, lonely, angry nights when he hated his friends, hated Michael for leaving him, abandoning him completely when he needed them most. He wasn’t the best friend but he did what they needed, helped where he could, took the blows he was dealt. And it got him what? Kidnapped. Left to be tortured and die. Alone.

But once he’d rested, once the blood stopped pulsing so loudly in his ears, he knew it was best. It was what he truly wanted. He’d never want Michael or the Evans’ to risk their safety, their secret, for him. And his other friends, they wouldn’t stand a chance against these fucking sadists.

It was best for all of this to end with him.

But now, as Michael stood in the space that was meant for Alex’s last moments, he couldn’t think.

“You’re nothing in here, Mr. Guerin.” His father’s voice was laced with condescension and excitement.

“Take me instead.”

Alex stopped breathing. Michael’s voice sounded calm and even, bordering on arrogant if that was possible with at least six guns pointed at him. Alex tried to speak but Mitchell beat him.

“If you haven’t noticed, asshole, you’re already taken.”

The sound of Michael’s laugh hit Alex’s ears and, beyond all reason, he smiled. That sound was so rare Alex couldn’t help but treasure it every time, even in the most dire of circumstances.

“Am I?” He felt the soldiers in front of him shift, a sudden change in the air. “Tell me, Master Sargent, why are you under the impression that I’m nothing?”

Alex grit his teeth and grimaced with the pain as he stretched as tall as he could. His eyes locked with Michael’s and Alex knew. There had been a plan. Thank fuck Michael had a plan.

The urge to sob and be held against Michael’s chest, wrapped in his strong arms was overwhelming.

“This place is so loaded with powder you won’t be able to shift a paper clip you fucking freak.”

Alex watched as Michael’s curls danced, moving with the nodding of his head.

“Yikes. I guess I didn’t realize. But I do have one more question.” He pointed to himself as he added, “curious by nature.”

He watched the hands of the soldier in front of him begin to shake, fingers gripping his weapon a bit too tightly. Alex smirked. Maybe they were starting to put it together.

With a voice suddenly full of anger and vitrol, Michael asked the room, “how the fuck do you think I got in here?”

In the blink of an eye, a force Alex couldn’t see pushed him against the wall, air leaving him with the strength of it. He gazed in wonderment, as if watching a movie or a perfect moment of a play, as the soldiers firearms all turned to white doves, flying confused and frightened around the space.

Each soldier died without Michael needing to move a muscle, his face unchanged, although his eyes had shifted from a stunning hazel to completely black. Alex thought he’d never looked better.

When the final man fell to the floor in a bloody pile, Michael turned that black, empty gaze to Alex. Jesse floated out of the room, chin lifted and struggling for air, and into the hall, toes barely touching the now stained linoleum.

Alex understood Michael’s silent question.

With difficulty, Alex stood, discovering his restraints had literally vanished. He met his father’s glare, searching one, last time for some semblance of shame, regret, sadness. He found nothing but disgust and hatred.

Cradling his core, Alex stood straight, the Manes man his father had always wanted him to be. He didn’t remove his eyes from his fathers and his voice didn’t waiver as he said, “lock him in and blow it up.”

Jesse’s body flew backward and into the room with his ever-obedient team. He landed on the floor, on his hands and knees, coughing and gasping for air.

Michael had moved to stand beside Alex, eyes now the stunning gold he normally wore, and took Alex’s bloody, broken hand in his.

“Don’t worry, Jesse.” Michael brought Alex’s hand up to his mouth and placed a delicate, gentle kiss to the back of it, mouth coming away scarlet with blood. “I’ll take good care of him.”

Jesse snarled and moved to stand before the door slammed shut and locked, Jesse’s screams slipping under the space of the door.

Alex stood, stunned, that it was finally over, that Michael was here, that Jesse would be gone, that he would live.

“We’ve gotta go.”

Alex nodded but didn’t move.

“Will you, Michael?”

“Will I what, Alex?”

He was too exhausted to keep the break from his voice. “Take care of me.”

Michael smiled as Alex felt his body become immeasurably lighter, moving without making any effort at all. Michael wrapped an arm around Alex and pulled him into his side.

“Forever if you’ll let me.”

Alex never imagined his happy ending would begin with an explosion.

#Roswell New Mexico #Malex #Malex fic #tw: abuse #tw: violence #tw: torture #tw: cursing #angst #angst with a hopeful ending #my fic #fic for Denver #barely edited

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bellakitse · 5 years

Text

Cause all of me, loves all of you

For @malex-i-never-look-away on her birthday. Toby, I hope you had a wonderful birthday, my dear!! Hope you like your gift!

Isobel hosts a single's mixer at Maria's bar, as Michael watches guy after guy hit on Alex, it forces him to confront his feelings.

Rated M

Michael gets three messages from Isobel in quick succession, telling him to get his ass over to the Wild Pony and to bring his tools or else. He gets two from Maria telling him that if he stresses Isobel out any more by taking his sweet time, she’s going to go after his balls and not in the fun way she used to. He lets out a tired sigh as he reads the texts before getting up from his bed and exiting his airstream, resigned to the fact that he has to deal with his sister and her girlfriend’s issues, he puts his car in gear and heads for the bar.

He doesn’t know what he did in a past life that he now has to deal with IsobelandMaria as he thinks of them these days, but he can’t imagine it was good.

Arriving at the Wild Pony a little after six, he groans as he takes in the sign hanging over the entrance.

‘Singles Mixer.’

Vaguely he recalls Isobel mentioning that she was planning the event the last time he had dinner with her and Maria. It’s not Maria’s usual style for the bar, and he doesn’t want to think for long what Isobel did to convince her girlfriend. He’s tempted to turn around, the whole thing starting to feel suspiciously like a trap, but curiosity has always been his downfall, so he gets out with his tools as requested and heads for the door.

The place is closed to the public, which makes sense if Isobel is making an event out of this. He sees Maria at the bar ready to set up for the night, her clothes colorful just like her, and he feels a wave of affection the way he always does when he sees her. They dated for three months (if you can call him being drunk half the time and miserable the rest, dating. More like her taking care of his sorry ass when he let her). And he’s grateful that he didn’t fuck up their friendship beyond repair. For a while, after they ended things, he was doubtful that she would ever allow him near her again. Especially after she found out the secret they were all keeping from her. But Maria is nothing if not kind-hearted and forgave him for being a shitty boyfriend and an even shittier friend. He thinks though, her starting something up with Isobel five months after they broke up probably helped the situation. A year later and the two are madly in love and going strong, while he and Maria are friends in a way they never were when they were together.

“I’m here, Deluca,” he calls out. “And if this is a trick to get me to do your sad little single’s night, I’m going to turn around right now.”

Maria gives him an unimpressed look but doesn’t bother to answer. Instead, she smirks as they hear the clicky-clack of Isobel’s heels.

“You’re in for it now, Guerin.”

“First of all,” Isobel starts as she rounds the bar, going behind it with Maria. He watches as she leans into Maria, her arm going around Maria’s slim waist, and Maria curves her body towards her. “Watch what you are calling sad, I’m the one planning this thing, so it’s going to be amazing. People will be talking about its success for weeks, as a matter of fact, the people who find love tonight will mention it at their weddings.”

Isobel looks pleased with Maria when she nods in agreement, an amused smile on her face. It seems to be the way Maria deals with Isobel, with loving amusement.

“Second,” Isobel continues, turning to face him, a fine shape brow arched. “Because I want it to be a success, you will not be participating, so don’t you worry. The people coming tonight are looking for love, not anonymous sex.”

Michael smirks at that, doubtful of the truth behind her words, but whatever. Instead, he just gives Isobel a shrug. “So I like to get right to the point. Sue me.”

Isobel makes a face at him, wrinkling her nose. “There’s a word for guys like you, Michael.”

“Charming?” Michael questions innocently, shooting Maria a glare when she snorts.

“Manwhore,” Isobel answers back sweetly.

Michael nods sarcastically, pushing his bottom lip out. “Hmm, well, this manwhore is going to leave if you don’t tell me why I’m here.”

“To help, obviously,” Isobel answers, rolling her eyes. “I need you to fix one of the taps, it’s leaking, the speakers on the left are making a static noise, and Maria is one bartender down, so you’re also going to stay and help, we open in an hour.”

The first two he can get done in under 30 minutes, but he stops short at the third, having no desire to stick around and watch the singles of Roswell try their awkward mating dance. “Since when am I a bartender, Iz?”

“You spend so much time here, I’m sure you can handle pouring beer and Whiskey, Michael,” Isobel answers, already ignoring him as her phone rings, and she moves to answer it. She gives the side of Maria’s face a distracted kiss as she heads to the back.

Michael sighs, annoyed but resigned and moves towards the bar, ready to start on his list. “Can’t you control your girlfriend, Deluca?”

“She’s your sister, Guerin,” Maria shoots back. “Nobody controls her.”

“Whatever,” Michael mutters, knowing it’s a lost cause to argue and starts to tighten the tap.

“You can help out for a night, Michael,” Maria says, giving him a look. “It’s important to her, and it’s good business for me, so try not to be a dick, okay?”

Michael stops and looks at her; he knows things have been tough. Mimi isn’t getting better, their powers haven’t helped her, even Max’s. And he knows it weighs on Isobel that they can’t help Maria and her mom.

“Okay,” he says finally, feeling like an ass when she lets out a relieved breath. “Sorry.”

Maria gives him a small smile, rolling her eyes at him playfully. “See you can be, what’s that word you used? Charming when you want to be.”

Michael narrows his eyes at her. “Your words say charming, but your tone says dick.”

Maria gives him an amused look as she pats his shoulder, walking by him. “Guess you’re a genius after all, now fix the tap.”

Michael nods as he gets to work. “Yes, ma’am.”

Michael makes a quick fix of the tap, it will hold for a while, but he needs to talk to Maria about getting some new equipment. Next, he works on the speakers, as Isobel asked. Taking his time until the music that comes out is smooth. The bar is opening by the time he’s done with his projects, and he’s behind the bar setting up a station for himself when the lonely hearts of their dusty town start trickling in. Maria is at the other end of the bar, already pouring the first whiskeys of the night.

“What are the chances this thing is actually successful?” he questions her as he hands over a Bud Light to a man in a plaid shirt.

“It’s Isobel’s event,” Maria looks over at him with a raised eyebrow. “When has anything Isobel planned not worked out perfectly by her sheer force of will?”

Michael rolls his eyes. “Are you about to start waxing poetic about Iz, right now?” he questions. “Hasn’t the honeymoon stage fade after a year of being together? Who would have thought that you two would be worse than Max and Liz,” he says, practically whining. It’s truly sickening how in love his siblings are with their humans and vice versa.

Maria shoots him a look. “What’s the matter, Guerin, jealous?”

Michael scoffs, rolling his eyes at her once more. “Hey, I dated you first, no reason to be jealous.”

Maria nods easily, with a smirk on her face that just spells trouble for him. “And then we broke up, and I got together with your sister, who is far more talented with her tongue,” she says sweetly.

Michael stares at her with wide eyes at the blow at his ego she just delivered, not knowing if he should take offense or applaud her absolute savageness. In the end, a laugh stops him from doing either, and he turns from Maria to find Alex standing in front of him, his hands resting on the bar.

Alex's face is perfectly blank, except for the way his eyes twinkle with amusement.

“Alex,” he breathes, blushing slightly. “Hey, how much did you just hear?”

Alex shrugs. “Not much,” he starts, there is a grin playing at his lips the longer he looks at Michael. “Though if we’re holding some kind of poll, just know that I never had any complaints about your tongue, Guerin, at least when you used it for something other then talking.”

Maria lets out a snort from where she stands, flashing Alex a wicked grin, which he returns easily, his dark brown eyes crinkling at the corners attractively.

“You actually came,” Maria comments, pleased, raising an eyebrow when Alex rolls his eyes at her, though his lips twitch at the double meaning of her words.

Michael glares at her as she burns him a second time.

“Tell me if I hadn’t shown up, your girlfriend would have left it alone and not shown up at my place to drag me here.”

Maria laughs loudly, shaking her head. “I would be lying if I told you that.”

“Exactly,” Alex says with a resigned sigh. “So here I am; hopefully, this gets her off my back.”

“Wait,” Michael starts and looks at Alex, taking in his appearance.

He looks good, but then again, when doesn’t he look good, especially to Michael. Alex is beautiful, he’s always been, and Michael knows that has nothing to do with the fact that he is still madly in love with him. He can be objective about that if nothing else when it comes to Alex.

He looks at him, taking in his black leather jacket, the fitted navy-colored dress shirt peeking underneath. He leans into the bar a little to discreetly check out the rest. Alex has on slim dark jeans that wrap his thighs nicely and a pair of black boots. His hair that he has been wearing longer is artfully messy, and Michael spots a five o’clock shadow that tells him Alex hasn’t shaved in a day or two, making Michael itch with the desire to press his cheek against Alex’s and feel the roughness.

Correction, good doesn’t even begin to describe how Alex looks. Michael’s walking wet dream would be a better descriptor. His heart starts to beat a little harder, both from want but also longing. These days he’s pretty good at keeping his feelings in check. Alex and he have been to hell and back, and they’ve come out the other side as friends, great friends even.

Alex had been nothing but understanding when he told him he needed to move on from them. Respectful, when he tried to have a relationship with Maria, and there every step of the way in any way, Michael needed him.

Michael had asked for a friend, and Alex had given him that tenfold. It’s his own fault that on the road to friendship, he didn’t get over being in love with him, and if anything, being friends with Alex has just made him love him more.

“Guerin?” Alex questions, the hand he has resting on the bar, reaching out to touch Michael’s forearm. “Are you okay?”

Michael snaps out of his thoughts; he looks at Alex, who is giving him a concerned look and then at Maria, who looks at him knowingly. He tells himself that she might be psychic, but she can’t actually read minds, and therefore can’t hear all his lovesick thoughts. A blonde girl in a sparkly top at the other end of the bar signals her, and she moves away from them with one last pointed look at him.

“Sorry,” he flashes Alex a smile, trying hard not to move. Alex’s hand is still on his arm, and he wants to enjoy it as long as he can. “Guess I spaced.”

Alex looks at him a moment longer, and Michael holds his breath, wondering if his face is showing everything he’s hiding.

He gives Alex another grin, this one teasing, hoping it distracts Alex. “I was going to ask if you are actually here for this mixer thing.”

Alex rolls his eyes, taking his hand off Michael, and Michael clenches his hand to keep from reaching out and interlocking their fingers. They never held hands when they were together, and Michael mourns it even though he’s never had it.

“Maria is a meddler,” Alex starts, saying it loudly enough for her to overhear him, smirking when she shoots him a narrow-eyed look. “And she decided to date your sister, who is also a meddler, so together they are meddlers squared.”

Michael laughs, nodding in agreement. “Still doesn’t explain why you’re here, though.”

Alex huffs, taking a seat and settling in. Michael puts a glass in front of him and pours him some Jim Beam.

Alex thanks him lifting the glass to his mouth, and Michael has to hold onto the bar as he watches Alex lick his lips after a sip. "They have been nagging me about dating every time I've had dinner with them the last few weeks. They've decided my mourning period from Forest is done and have been threatening me with blind dates."

Michael makes a face at the mention of Alex's last boyfriend. If you could even call him that when they only went out for the six most miserable weeks of Michael's life. The guy had left a little over a month ago for a new job.

"Do you regret not taking him up on his offer?" he can't help but ask, the question has been nagging at him since he heard that Forest asked Alex to leave with him, and Alex had turned him down.

"I liked Forest, he was nice," Alex says honestly, and as much as Michael hates it, he knows it's true. Just because he hated the guy on sight doesn't mean he wasn't a good guy who made Alex smile and laugh in a way that Michael hadn't seen in a long time. "But nice isn't enough, especially after only a few weeks of dating, to leave my life here or leave the people I love again," Alex watches him with those dark eyes of his, something unfathomable in them that makes Michael's pulse spike. "People that need me and that I need in return to be happy."

Michael doesn’t know what to say, not when all he wants to ask if he’s still one of the people Alex loves, one of the people that he needs to be happy. He hopes he still is, every part of him hopes that more than anything, but they haven’t been together in almost two years, and in all that time Alex hasn’t once hinted at more than friendship. There are times when he thinks he sees the longing in Alex’s eyes, but for all he knows, that’s just his own wishful thinking playing tricks on him.

Alex clears his throat and flashes him a crooked smile that is slightly embarrassed. “Anyway, I figured I might as well cave and do their little mixer and get them off my back for a while,” he shrugs. “It’s not like Roswell is a buzzing LBGT hub, how many guys can I possibly meet anyway?”

***

How many guys?

The answer is too fucking many if you ask Michael. He has watched four guys in the last hour go up to Alex, chatting him up, touching his arm when they can, lighting up when they get him to smile or laugh and given the looks Alex has been getting from every corner of the room, it isn’t going to stop at just those four.

“What the fuck did you guys do?” he questions from his corner of the bar. Isobel sits across from him, looking out at the crowd of single people flirting, exchanging numbers, and pressed closely in dark corners, with a smug, satisfied look on her face. “Did you two bus in every gay guy from neighboring cities? I haven’t seen half these guys in town before.”

Isobel turns in her stool with a smirk on her face. “Not just gay, but bisexual, and sexually undecided too.”

Maria, who has come over to them, coughs to cover a laugh. “With Alex’s face and ass, they won’t be sexually undecided for long.”

“Why?” Michael asks with a frown at the annoyance he hears in his own voice; he pours himself a shot, he’s been forced to watch the love of his life be hit on by objectively hot guys with no end in sight, sober. Obviously, it’s time for alcohol. He tips the shot back, letting it burn down his throat, but not before catching the looks that Maria and Isobel give each other.

“What?” he questions, the word coming out harsher than he wants. They share yet another look like his outburst proves whatever silent conversation they are having, and he sighs. He’s not stupid, and he knows what they’re thinking. Alex called them meddlers, and they are, not just with Alex but with Michael too. Except where they seemed hellbent on getting Alex at the very least laid. They seem determined to get him to finally admit his feelings for Alex. “Don’t start,” he warns them even though he already knows it's pointless with them.

“Why ask then?” Maria questions, tilting her head with a curious expression on her face.

“Michael,�� Isobel starts softly, making him sigh again but now tiredly. He knows that tone. It’s her sisterly ‘I just want you to be as happy as I am’ voice.

“How long are you going to wait?” she questions quietly. “You hated when he was with Forest. You hate that guys are talking to him right now.”

“You love him,” Maria points out bluntly. “You’ve never stopped loving him.”

“You guys are friends now,” Isobel takes over. “You’ve built a relationship, a good one, but you’re in love with him, we can all see it.”

“Except him,” Maria mutters, rolling her eyes.

“Well, they’re both smart idiots,” Isobel says to her, flashing Maria a wicked smile, which Maria returns, reaching out to brush back a wisp of blonde hair out of Isobel’s face. Isobel’s smile softens at the gesture, and Michael aches because he wants what they have. He wants to reach out and touch Alex like that; he wants Alex to smile at him with love in his eyes the way Maria looks at Isobel.

“We’re friends,” Michael says quietly, getting their attention back on him. “What if I fuck that up?” he asks, feeling himself go hot when they both look at him with painfully gentle expressions on their face.

“You’re scared,” Maria tells him, and she looks back at Isobel. “Being in love is scary, especially given the history you guys have, we get that.”

Isobel nods, but she tilts her head in the direction of Alex, who is now talking to a different guy with brown hair and a wide smile on his face as Alex speaks.

“That’s Jacob,” Isobel starts, and Michael looks at the man better, recognizing him as Max’s latest partner. “He’s had a crush on Alex for a while; he’s just been waiting because Alex was with Forest. He’s good looking and charming, and he lives here, we didn’t ‘bus’ him in, and he came specifically for Alex.”

“Isobel,” Maria warns softly, but Isobel continues, her expression has gone from loving sister to ‘I’m about to lay some hard truths on you.’

“He’s not going anywhere,” Isobel continues. “You hated Forest and got lucky that he left. What happens if Jacob gets a date out of Alex, or a second date or a tenth, and they get serious,” she raises an eyebrow at him, and he scowls at her because he knows what she’s getting at. “They end up falling in love,” she twists in deeper, and he can’t help but flinch. “And you have to stand there and watch because you were scared.”

Maria shakes her head with a sigh. “Thank god I don’t have siblings,” she murmurs, taking a sip of her beer.

“You’ve made your point, Isobel,” Michael says quietly, his hands clenched into fists, and he feels the energy around him ripple, making the bottles behind him shake faintly. Maria, who is standing close to him, shoots him a look.

“Guerin, if you break anything in here, I will make you sorry,” she hisses, flashing a smile to a regular who looks at the bottles weirdly. “The music is making everything vibrate in here,” she jokes to him.

“I need some air,” Michael declares, grabbing his hat, already heading for the door before either woman can stop him. He crosses the bar as quickly as he can, given all the people inside. He catches Alex’s eye as he tries to leave, there is a frown on his face as he watches Michael, but all Michael can see is the way that Jacob guy is standing inches away from Alex, his body curved towards him intimately, Isobel’s words echoing in his head, ‘they end up falling in love’ and his chest hurts.

He stops and heads for Alex and his new friend instead, his pulse racing as he realizes what he’s about to do.

“Hey,” Alex greets him gently as he comes to stand before them, his brow pinched together, he nods towards the bar, and it doesn’t surprise Michael at all that Alex spotted his small use of power. “Is everything all right?”

Michael looks at him and then at Jacob. “Sorry,” he tells the man, getting a confused look back, but Michael doesn’t have time for him anymore and looks back at Alex.

“I’m still in love with you,” he blurts out, his words steady when his heart is anything but, he feels it thumping hard against his chest. “I never stopped.”

Alex’s eyes widen, and his mouth drops, but nothing comes out. Michael stands there, his skin crawling and starting to feel hot as the seconds tick by, and Alex continues to stare at him.

“I-I should go,” Jacob says awkwardly, flashing him a sympathetic look, and Michael feels a wave of humiliation wash over him.

“No,” he gets out, the word choking him. “I think that’s my line,” he looks at Alex, who still seems frozen. “Sorry.”

He turns on his heel and exits the bar like his ass is on fire, calling himself a hundred times an idiot. His eyes sting as he gets into his truck, but he reels it in, the tears will have to wait for when he’s in the privacy of his home, where he has a bottle of whiskey and acetone under his bed.

***

Michael makes it back to the junkyard in record time, and he’s grateful that no one pulled him over for speeding, given just how fast he was driving. He’s barely out of his truck and a few steps away from his airstream when an SUV comes roaring in, slamming on the breaks the driver stops inches away from his truck. Michael stands there, shocked as he takes in Alex jumping out of his car, his face a thunderstorm as he walks towards him.

“How fucking dare you!” Alex shouts, and Michael can’t say anything in the face of his anger. “You tell me you love me and then you just leave?”

Michael doesn't have an answer that won’t cause him to break down, so he focuses on something else. “How fast were you going that you got here so fast?”

Alex’s eyes bug out at his question, “Are you serious right now, Guerin?” Alex asks incredulously. “As fast as you were going, obviously.”

“You shouldn’t speed, it’s dangerous,” he states stupidly, wincing at his own words and the way Alex looks up at the sky like he’s asking some higher power for patience.

“You. Were. Speeding,” Alex clips out each word.

Michael digs in, determined to keep the focus on this and not on his humiliating declaration. “I have powers.”

“Now I know you’re an alien, your logic is not our earth logic,” Alex looks at him with a dry unamused expression. “And don’t think you’re going to distract me with this ridiculous conversation, Guerin.”

Michael breathes in deep and gives Alex a fake bold smirk. “What do you want to talk about?”

Alex gives him an unimpressed look, calling Michael’s bluff. “You told me you loved me and then you left before I could say anything about it.”

Michael clenches his jaw, feeling the lingering humiliation course through him as he thinks of just who might have overheard him, he tries to work up some anger as a defense, but all he feels is heartsick.

"Your silence was answer enough,” Michael answers, coming to grips with what it means.

Alex doesn’t love him anymore, he realizes, and he looks down at his feet as his eyes flood with tears. He thinks he deserves this. He knows he broke Alex’s heart when he dated Maria, no matter how gracious Alex was about it. It’s his turn now.

"Excuse me for being caught off guard!” Alex shouts, raising his arms up in the air, exasperated. “You were saying everything I have wanted you to say for the last two years! For a moment, I thought I was dreaming again, Michael.”

Michael looks up at Alex, his words not making sense. “You dream about me telling you I still love you?”

Alex gives him a dirty look that is so Alex, Michael falls in love just a little bit more if possible. “Don’t act dumb, Michael, you’re a literal genius, it doesn’t suit you.”

Hope is a dangerous thing, Michael has always known this, but right now he can’t help the hope that is bubbling up in his chest. “Do you still love me, Alex?”

Alex lets out a noise that is half-amused, half-annoyed, and crosses the distance between them until he’s standing in front of Michael, within touching distance. “There you go, asking dumb questions you should already know the answer too,” Alex shakes his head, but there is a smile on his face that robs Michael of air. “But since apparently, you're slow right now, fine. I still love you, Michael, I have never, not for one single second since the age of 17, stopped loving you. It's as constant as the sun rising every morning.”

“Alex,” is all he gets out, a lump in his throat.

Alex looks at him so softly, and Michael can’t stop the sob that escapes his mouth, it’s so much like the ones he’s seen Maria and Isobel give each other. Alex reaches out, his hand pulling at Michael’s shirt, and Michael goes more than willingly, pressing his face into Alex’s neck as Alex wraps his arms around him.

“I love you, Michael,” Alex whispers into the side of his face. “I love you, I love you, I love you. God, I love you so fucking much.”

Michael pulls back to look at those brown eyes he loves so much. “You love me, and I love you, why aren’t we together?”

Alex shrugs but doesn’t stop holding him. “You said you wanted to be friends.”

“You said it first!” Michael argues because it’s true, he remembers before everything went to shit, Alex standing right where they stand now, telling him that.

Alex shrugs again, with no answer, and Michael rolls his eyes at just how stupid they’ve both been.

“Okay, we’ve both been ridiculous, but I have a solution,” Michael starts.

Alex raises an eyebrow at him. “We stop being stupid right now; we decide to be together because that’s what you do when you’re in love, and you fucking kiss me already.”

Alex lets out a laugh that turns into a groan when Michael gets tired of waiting and covers his mouth with his. Michael doesn’t waste any time. He licks at Alex's plump bottom lip, sucking it between his lips as Alex parts his mouth. Alex groans again and pulls him tighter to his hard body, his hands cradling his neck and lower back. Michael presses his hips flushed against Alex’s, feeling him hardening in his jeans, he rolls his body, and Alex lets out a sound that vibrates between them, sending all the blood rushing to Michael’s dick.

He breaks the kiss and looks at Alex, his skin is a pretty shade of pink, and his eyes are hazy, and his mouth is bruised from their kissing.

He’s never looked more beautiful to Michael.

“I know we still have a lot to talk about,” he starts, holding on to Alex; he takes a step closer to his airstream. Alex looks over to it and then back at him, there is so much want on his face for Michael to see, and it just makes Michael’s body tighten even more. “I swear we can talk until we’re hoarse,” he trails off, he knows Alex gets his meaning by the way his eyes darken even more. “But can we do that later?”

Alex doesn’t answer him with words. Instead, he breaks away from him and heads for the airstream, pulling off his leather jacket as he goes and throwing it over the chair closest to Michael’s home before he starts to climb the small set of steps, leaving Michael to follow.

Michael takes a steadying breath as he feels his hands shake at the realization of what’s about to happen. What he gets to finally have again.

He follows Alex’s path and enters his airstream, shutting the door behind him. Alex has turned on the light above his bed and gotten rid of his shirt already. He turns to face Michael, lifting a hand out to him.

“Come here,” he says softly to him, his tone feeling like a touch to Michael.

Michael pulls his own shirt over his head as he walks towards Alex, letting it drop behind him, earning a smile from Alex when he takes his hand.

Alex pulls him towards him until their chests are pressed against each other, and Michael has to close his eyes at the sensation. It’s been so long since he’s felt Alex’s skin against his. They haven’t even started, and Michael already feels on a ragged edge.

“Michael, look at me,” Alex whispers, his hands touching his face, running over his curls, holding him in place as Michael opens his eyes to look at him. “What do you want?”

“You,” Michael answers instantly. “You, I want you, all around me, Alex, I need-“

Alex waits for him to continue, but Michael can’t say anything else. Love and lust, want, is coursing through him in a way that only happens with Alex, and he can’t get anything else out over the need he feels inside him, so instead he turns and sits on his bed, Alex’s bellybutton at eye level. He leans in and presses a kiss against it, his tongue tracing around it as Alex lets out a gasp.

Michael continues to lay wet kisses on Alex’s skin as his hands undo Alex’s belt and pulls down on the zipper of his jeans. He presses another kiss over Alex’s cloth-covered cock, feeling it harden even further under his mouth as he starts pulling down his pants past his ass. Alex’s hands jerk at his sides, but he doesn’t stop Michael.

He rests his chin on Alex’s washboard abs and stares up at him as he pushes down Alex’s boxer-briefs to his thighs. Alex sucks in a breath, his mouth parted as he looks down at Michael.

“I’ve missed you,” Michael murmurs, still looking up at him.

Alex caresses the side of his face with his fingertips. “Me too, baby.”

Michael sighs, feeling warm all over at the endearment. He pulls back enough to bring his mouth to Alex’s cock, licking up the small pearl of precum at the slit. Alex makes a strangled noise, and Michael grins up at him before taking him into his mouth.

“Fuck,” Alex curses, his hands going straight for Michael’s hair as Michael starts to suck him in deeper, pressing his tongue at the underside the way Alex always liked. Alex’s fingers tighten around his curls, and Michael lets out a sound of approval, he’s always liked when Alex grips his hair.

He loves the way Alex tries to stay in control despite knowing that Michael will do everything in his power to get him to unravel. He sucks on Alex some more, reveling in his tastes for a minute longer before Alex starts to tug him away, Michael pops off him and looks back up at him. Alex swears softly, his thumb brushing over Michael's bottom lip.

"If you keep doing that, this is going to end so damn quick," Alex admits, laughing quietly when Michael gives him a proud look. "Yeah, you already know what you do to me, no need to be smug."

"I finally have you back, and I'm going to keep you forever," Michael tells him, a wide smile on his face as Alex lets out a shuddering breath. "I'm going to be smug until the end of time."

Alex looks at him and shakes his head, amused. "Do you have to be smug right now, or will you stop long enough for me to make love to you?"

Michael stands up, quickly undoing his belt. "You know I can do both, Alex, come on."

Alex laughs happily, pulling him in for a wet, lingering kiss. "I love you, Michael."

Michael sighs into the kiss, his heart tripping all over itself at the words.

They work quickly to get rid of their clothes and climb into bed. Michael sits next to Alex, reaching out to help Alex remove his prosthetic. He leans down and presses a soft kiss on Alex's knee, right above where his leg ends. He looks up when Alex lets out a small gasp, his eyes glassy as he looks at Michael.

"I'm never letting go of you again," Alex tells him, the promise on his face clear, and Michael feels any last lingering doubts disappear.

He lays back on his small bed, a pillow under his hips, and his legs spread for Alex, exposed and vulnerable for him as he sits between his knees.

"You're so beautiful, Michael," Alex whispers, his hands on Michael's thighs, spreading him even further. Michael feels on display under Alex's gaze, his dick hard against his belly.

Alex starts to move. "I need-"

Michael doesn't let him finish his sentence, and with the little brain function he still has, floats a condom and a bottle of lube towards Alex, who plucks them out of the air.

“We are so using your powers for sex from now on,” Alex says with a grin as he coats his fingers with lube, letting it warm up before he touches Michael. “They’re convenient.”

Michael lets out a laugh that turns into a moan as Alex presses his fingers to his rim.

“Alex,” Michael gets out, his voice rough as Alex teases him with small circles of his fingers, he tilts his hips up as Alex starts to slide one finger in him, giving him shallow thrusts, curling his finger to seek out the small bundle of nerves that makes Michael see stars.

“You’re so tight,” Alex murmurs as he adds a second finger, while his other hand strokes Michael’s cock in a hold tight enough to make Michael moan. It’s so much and not enough. No, Michael needs more, he needs Alex inside him, now.

“Alex, baby, please,” Michael begs, pushing himself into Alex’s hands. “I need you.”

“I’m making sure you’re ready,” Alex admonishes him gently. “You’re too tight around my fingers.”

“It’s been a long time since I’ve done this,” he breathes, staring at Alex intently. He keeps staring at him when Alex's eyes widen.

“You mean since the last time we?“

Michael nods.

Alex closes his eyes. “You’re trying to kill me,” he says as he takes his fingers out of Michael and rolls him on his side, sliding in behind him. He makes a quick work of the condom before lining himself up with Michael’s hole. He lifts Michael’s leg, placing it back over his own.

“I feel like such a possessive asshole for being pleased with the fact that no one else has been like this with you, since me,” Alex whispers into his throat as he wraps his arms around Michael’s torso and starts to breach him. Michael lets out a whine, holding on to the edge of the bed as Alex starts to fill him up. He enjoys the exquisite burn of being full and lets out a gasp when Alex’s hips touch his ass. “It means you’re mine.”

Michael tightens at Alex’s words, the way Alex says them hot against the shell of his ear, but he hears a question in there, and he nods frantically as Alex starts to move, pulling back until just the tip is in, before pushing back into Michael, making every nerve-ending in Michael light up.

“Yes,” Michael gasps, his whole body feeling on fire from Alex’s body behind him. His hands touch his chest, pinching his nipples the way Michael likes, making his spine bend, and he fucks himself back into Alex’s cock mindlessly as his orgasm starts to build.

“Yours, always,” he gets out, letting out a sob as Alex runs his fingers down his stomach and wraps his hand around Michael's painfully hard cock and starts to stroke it in tempo with his thrusts.

Michael turns his head, pressing his face into his pillow, biting down on it to muffle his screams of pleasure as Alex fucks him over the edge. He lets out a long moan as Alex’s cock nails his prostate over and over, and he comes in hot spurts in Alex’s hand. His body tightens like a coil and then releases, leaving him boneless and breathless.

He hears Alex curse again, and he feels Alex pull him flush against his chest, his face in the crook of Michael’s neck, his teeth on the meat of his shoulder as he also comes. His hips thrusting a few more times as he rides it out.

They lay like that, Alex’s arms wrapped around him, petting him as he holds him while he softens inside Micheal.

Eventually, Alex pulls out of Michael, and Michael makes a sad noise at the loss. Alex leans down and presses a kiss on his bare shoulder. He rids himself of the condom, eyes the wastebasket by the door, and chucks it.

Michael turns over to face Alex, pushing Alex on his back and lays back down, half on top of him, his leg thrown over Alex’s.

Alex chuckles as Michael cuddles into his side. “We’re going to have to get up to clean ourselves up, or we’ll fall asleep like this and wake up all sticky.”

Michael makes a noise of agreement but doesn’t bother to move, and Alex laughs again, his arm resting across Michael’s back, his fingers drawing shapes into Michael’s skin.

“I guess sticky isn’t so bad,” Alex concedes, and Michael hums agreeing again.

They lay there quietly, basking in the afterglow. It’s only after a while, and when Michael is on the road to a good night's sleep that he feels Alex shake. He lifts his head from Alex’s chest to look at him, and he’s greeted with a wide grin and amused brown eyes.

“What’s so funny?” he asks, his lips curving up in the face of a happy Alex.

“Isobel and Maria,” Alex starts, laughter taking over. “They are going to be so smug that their mixer worked.”

Michael rolls his eyes, realizing how right Alex is, they’re going to be insufferable. He remembers what Isobel told him earlier about people mentioning the mixer at their future weddings and grins.

“Alex, no matter what happens, you have to promise me one thing,” he says seriously even as his heart races.

Alex frowns, taking in his serious tone. “Anything.”

“When we get married,” he starts, grinning when Alex’s eyes widen. “No matter what, we don’t mention the mixer, we can’t give Isobel the satisfaction.”

Alex stares at him, and Michael feels his cheeks ache from his grin, and his chest feels like it will burst from just how happy he is. Alex narrows his eyes at him, but the corners of his lip curve upward.

“Okay, when we get married,” Alex answers, a small challenge in his tone, but also a promise. “We won’t mention it at all.”

Satisfied, Michael kisses him softly, before placing his head on Alex’s chest once more, smiling when he hears the racing thump-thump of Alex’s heart and how it matches his own.

#roswell nm #malex fic #malex #michael x alex #maribel #maria x isobel #my writing #first time writing maribel and i'm in love with them now

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love-amihan · 3 years

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| ʜᴏᴍᴇ | ᴊᴊᴋ | ᴀᴏᴛ | ʜǫ | ꜰɪʟᴏ | ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛs | ᴍɪᴍɪ |

JJK BOYS IF THEY'RE FROM THE PHILIPPINES

amihan's note: i'm sorry if i've been speaking in my native language so much, but this is just too good to pass. if you can't understand filipino you can ignore this, thank you ^~^)/ happy reading!

sadboi!yuta, chickboi!toge, fboi!satoru, fboi!sukuna

-okkotsu yuta

siya yung madamdamin masyado na jowa

tipong nawala lang siya saglit sa tabi mo tas pagbalik niya may kausap ka iba;

Yuta: babe may kunin lang ako

Ikaw: hmm, sige babe hintayin kita

-pagbalik ni yuta, nakita niya may kausap ka-

Yuta: *tumabi sayo*

Ikaw: babe si todo nga pala, may natanong lang siya sakin

Yuta: *tamang tango lang*

Todo: sige y/n, salamat sa advice

-nung dalawa na lang kayo-

Yuta: okay lang sakin y/n

Ikaw: huh?

Yuta: kung mas masaya ka sakanya maiintindihan ko naman

Ikaw: yuta ano sinasabi mo?

Yuta: gets ko naman eh, matangkad siya, maskulado tapos gwapo pa, walang wala ako pagdating sakanya

Ikaw: huy anong tumatakbo sa utak mo? *sabay hawak sa kamay ni yuta*

Yuta: ayaw kita masakal, kung masaya ka sakanya dun na rin ako masaya

kailangan mo lagi siya comfort kapag nakikita ka niya may kasama iba

uy ano yun may ka-duo ka bigla? sige dun ka naman daw masaya

-inumaki toge

ito masyado naman friendly

di niya alam nakikipag-flirt na yung babae sakanya

pati rin siya di niya alam nagfliflirt din

inumaki nakakapit na siya sayo huy!

-naglalakad kayo sa tabi ng daan tapos bigla may tumawag kay inumaki-

Mai (wag niyo q atakihin siya nakikita q ganito--): toge!

Toge: uy mai *smile*

Ikaw: *nanahimik sa tabi*

Mai: *hawak hawak sa biceps ni inumaki* hahaha oo nga eh

Toge: tapos ito pa *tuloy pagsabi ng mga jokes*

Ikaw: *kinalabit si inumaki* kailangan na natin umalis

Toge: ah oo nga pala *tinignan si mai* sige, una na kami

Mai: kita tayo ulit, hanggang sa muli toge *kiniss siya sa cheeks*

Ikaw: *gasp, the audacity ghorl*

Toge: *tinignan ka* bait niya na kaibigan no?

Ikaw: *tinignan siya masama*

-gojo satoru

chick magnet 😔✋

hindi nauubusan ng chicks, every week may bago

'di niya alam mga pangalan nila, napagpapalit pa minsan hays

Satoru: uy angela!

Ikaw: ...sino si angela?

Satoru: ay my bad *charming smile* angel pala

Ikaw: satoru--

Satoru: wait wait, paula?

Ikaw: hindi--

Satoru: mia! *sabay turo, malaki smile kasi kala niya nakuha na niya*

Ikaw: y/n

Satoru: *akbay sayo with matching kindat* yun nga sabi ko, tara may alam ko pwede natin puntahan

-ryomen sukuna

ito kabaligtaran ni gojo, alam niya lahat ng pangalan

pero palaiwas kapag nakikita niya

-naglalakad kayo ni sukuna, nag-uusap habang umiinom ng milktea-

Ikaw: tapos nangyari pa ito--

Sukuna: *lumaki mata sabay hablot sayo dun sa hindi makikita ng babae na sinabihan niya na ayaw niya sa commitment*

Ikaw: may problema ba sukuna?

Sukuna: *balik tingin sayo* huh? *iling iling* wala wal-- *may nakita nanaman siya babae, ito naman sinabihan niya lilipat na kasi sila tas di niya kaya ldr*

Ikaw: sukuna pwed--

-hinalikan ka ni sukuna para di makita, yung isa niyang mata nakabukas para malaman niya kung naalis na si babae-

Ikaw: *hinampas siya sa braso* huy enebe!

Sukuna: *smile sayo* sorry, di ko mapigilan

"nararamdaman ko yung nararamdaman mo eh" -babalu

tagging; @lemon-royalcween

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horrorboydyke · 4 years

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ten for ten for ten

answer 10 questions, come up with 10 questions, tag 10 people to answer them

1. If you had the chance to reconsume any book, film, show, poem, anything, without knowing anything about it, what would it be? Why?

So for TV shows, it would be druck for obvious reasons, I don’t think I’ve ever felt more alive than when I was watching druck live.

For poems, I would die to read The Glass Essay by Anne Carson again it’s a really long read but I feel like I’m truly seen when I read it.

For books, it would be Leah on the offbeat, it’s just an incredible read with really good bisexual rep.

2. What is something you’ve learned in the last couple of years that’s most enjoyable to you?

A while ago I taught myself a lot about the history of aboriginal people in Australia because my school didn’t teach me and i felt that to me because a large majority of my friends are aboriginal, it was important for me to educate myself with their history. So much of aboriginal history is so interesting, I talked to the elders of the Yorta Yorta tribe (my town is Yorta Yorta land and it will always remain their land) and I heard their stories of the Mimi Spirits, featherfoot and Wandjina.

3. Describe your ideal day off/weekend.

Probably just staying in bed and playing animal crossing, that's all I’ve been doing during quarantine besides from course work.

4. What’s your favourite scent of a candle?

I really like the scent of artificial cherry or this one specific cheap ass candle from Kmart and I’m pretty sure its fig & papaya or fig & passionfruit but it’s like 2 dollars and its the best candle I’ve bought.

5. If you could see one thing behind your window every day after waking up, what would it be?

I just got back from going to the city with my brother cause the lockdown is lifted and we went to his endocrinologist and I just always end up falling in love with the cityscape so I would love to wake up and look down on the city below.

6. What is something special about someone you love?

Though my brother makes me want to bash my head against a wall, he’s the strongest person I know. He’s trans and he is the reason I was able to be open with my family about my sexuality, his courage is something special. We are very close in age and literally have the same political beliefs so I feel at times that we feel very distanced from our parents who don’t really know/care about politics and that's made it easier for us to be so close. We are able to have conversations for hours about our beliefs like on our way to and from the city we were in the car for about 4 and a half hours and we talked non stop just about anything.

Like yesterday a few of the conversation topics that were talked about were: American politics, Australian politics, abortion rights, a discussion about a book we had both read about intergenerational trauma and that topic continued into us talking about our fucked childhood and reading out an argument one of us got into online.

That was a super long answer but in conclusion, just the bond we have is super special.

7. Do you prefer lined, checkered, dotted or plain paper? Why?

Definitely lined. I have atrocious handwriting that slopes if I wasn't writing on lined paper lmao.

8. Do you have any tattoos? Do you want any?

I have really shitty stick and poke tattoos from when I was 13, here in Australia you have to be over 18 to get a tattoo and I was so desperate to get one I did it myself and I wish I hadn't because now at 17 I'm cool with waiting for another 12 months to get a super well done and proper tattoo.

Yes I definitely want tattoos lmao but i’m so glad i wasn’t able to get tattoo’s when i was 13, 14 and 15 because i would have shitty tv show tattoo’s like teen wolf tattoos that now at 17 i fucking hate that show.

9. You publish the book you’ve always dreamed of publishing. Did you imagine it with hardcover or paperback? What colours do you see on the cover? Do you know what kind of book it would be?

i honestly have never thought about this but I just know my book is a hardcover. I think my book would be about a girl living in a cottage in the woods and a Princess comes along and they go on adventures together, they adopt several cats, they both practice witchcraft and pray to aphrodite or Freya and they fall in love (low-key kinda like tangled but without the long hair, tower, evil witch and oh yeah, no men, no violence, the only time they fight is when they are choosing the name for their cat) on the cover, it would be a background of a forest with the two main characters walking in a single file line with two cats following them. The main colours would be green, white and at times, grey.

10. What song do you have stuck in your head now?

I had yummy by Ayesha erotica stuck in my head like 5 minutes ago and now it's perverted by Elita

The questions I have are:

1. What do you personally think the meaning of life is? Why do you think that?

2. Is there any social media content creators that you hate-watch?

3. The last time you felt seen? was it when you read a certain book or heard someone say something that deeply resonated within you?

4. What do you associate the word “Ethereal” with?

5. What do you find the hardest about living in your country? explain why?

6. What are some political beliefs that are extremely important to you? (eg, abortion rights, immigration laws etc)

7. Is tom nook capitalist scum? or just a kind tanuki just trying to help out?

8. Do you listen to asmr? if so what type of asmr is your favourite? if you don’t, why not?

9. Skins or Euphoria?

10. Shows you used to like or fandoms you used to be in but now find just really cringy?

thank you for tagging me @sweterki

I’m going to tag @wormoffthestringg @florenzim @shysunsetlover @your-local-bi @yadomik @jewishdavid @doriangayjpg @swordfisherking @letsbegolden @bistan

#tag game #long post

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blackrosesfanfic · 4 years

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Chapter 224

Cammie

"Shut up!" I yell to Hidia

"Jayla?" Trey says walking up.

I turn around looking at Hidia as she laughs. She just said that Trey was gonna come over here and I was gonna start rejecting her and acting like she doesn't exist. I roll my eyes at her. Trey grabs my waist. Like I said before I have been over being mad with him since I went to Vegas. But I am still bitter about the whole fucking ordeal and I don't want to let it go. I could deal with it coming up one more time.

"I thought you were over here on the phone."

"Who I got to be on the phone with in private?" I snap.

He shrugs looking around me at Hidia who is still laughing with herself. "Hidi."

"Trey." Hidia says. "So Tiki is coming tomorrow."

"Who is that?" Trey says with an attitude.

Hidia laughs. "Her boy crush from high school."

"Really?" I snap.

"Her who?"

"Wanna see a pic? Chris said I could invite a plus one. You said you didn't mind right, Cam?"

I roll my eyes. "Stop. He can't take jokes like that. Your baby daddy will not be allowed in the house."

Hidia giggles. "Well anyway, Trey. If you weren't so involved in this chick and actually cared about her fucking family then you would have known Tiki was my baby daddy."

"Your baby daddy a fucking Hispanic named Julio or Romeo or some shit with an O." Trey snaps.

"Oh really?" Hidia laughs.

Trey hugs my waist. "You wanna get in the water?"

"No." I say.

"Hey, Mama baby." Hidia yells. "Yes, ButtButt."

I step away from Trey getting closer to Hidia. Her baby was at his grandma's house in San Antonio. This girl's son be all over the place with his grandma. She turns the phone to me. He is like 5. He smiles at the camera and waves at me. I've never heard him talk.

"Are you being good?" She smiles.

"That big boy." I snap kissing at him.

He covers his face then moves away from the camera. Her baby daddy's mother is smiling at where he went. They treat that boy like a fucking 1 year old. I smile and walk away. I'm not about to fucking judge. I'm glad that we had Caden and Lane was always around JJ sharing. Imagine if he had only child syndrome. Lane's ass bad. Too bad not to talk.

"Cammie?" Trey says.

"Cammie!" Someone yells from towards the fire.

I narrow my eyes like that would help my ass see in the dark. I start walking back to the fire. Trey grabs my arm. I pull it away from him although he doesn't really resist. He just starts walking behind me.

"Bae!" Fadiya yells. "Hey."

"Where did they find you from?" I say hugging her.

She smiles really hard. "Got a phone call from Chris Brown's assistant inviting me to spend some time with my favorite celebrity. I saw you on live the other day."

"You should have requested to join."

"Oh." She giggles. "I was kinda busy, you know."

"No I don't know. Do share."

She smiles behind me. "Hey, Trey."

He doesn't say nothing. I glance behind me. He was just standing there being weird. Like why you behind me with all of that? What's with the attitude? Oh... oh yeah. My attitude. I'll be nice next time. Fuck him. I stop walking and push him. He looks at me hurt and shocked. Amber walks up in between us facing Trey. She turns around suddenly and pushes me.

"Bruh." I say laughing.

"How does that feel then?" She says.

I suck my teeth at her and sit down. She walks off. I look at Trey. He sits in the chair closes to him away from me. No sir. You bring your bald ass head over here to me. You don't have a fucking option to fucking be mad. He stands up looking at Chris. April comes up carrying a whining Lane. I sigh a bit about to move to get him from her but she takes him to Trey. Lane jumps into Trey's arms and starts crying. Oh hell. Emotional Trey not going to be able to handle that. Well then why the hell do I think he is able to fucking handle my attitude? Fuck me. So I should be glad he found my mother and came back level headed and not drunk or something? Well...

"He doesn't want to be in the house." April says low. Trey doesn't say anything but keeps walking.

Chris sits up in his chair a bit. "Maybe he..."

"Oh shut up Chris." I say standing up. "You helped enough."

"Sounds..." Chris starts then looks at me.

I stand up and run up to Trey. I touch his back then rub it in a circle. I whisper to him that there are people inside the house too. I walk away then look back. He had stopped walking. Lane was still crying but not as loud. Trey turns and start walking out into the poorly lit ocean shore. It seems like you walking into a pit. I kick the water.

"What that?" Lane asks.

"Mommy." Trey says. I look back at them. Trey puts him down. "Be careful."

Lane walks over sleepily then he starts running. I could barely see the big smile on his face. He runs up to me then he looks down at the water and chases the wave as it runs from him. He turns around and runs back. Papa bear Trey grabs his hand when he is near not letting him run back at the wave. I lean on Trey as Lane fights to get away. I touch his cheek to see exactly how much he was crying. I know he was.

"Stop." He says slapping my hand away.

"Tremaine." I say hugging his waist. "Okay fine. We will act like nothing is wrong."

"Let go, Daddy." Lane whines.

I pick Lane up and run towards the water. He giggles but tries to get down to do it himself. I let the water hit us. He gasps then starts whining again. He is just so sleepy he doesn't know what he wants to do. I wait til the water retreats again and put him down so he could run from it to Trey. He gets half way to Trey and just throws himself sideways screaming like he suddenly woke up from his bad dream.

"My baby." I say getting to him before Trey. I pick him up. "Tell Mommy bout it."

"He hurt himself?" Trey says looking at his feet.

I hit Trey's head with Lane's hand. "No, Daddy." I say.

Lane giggles. "No Mommy do it."

"Mommy." Trey says kissing Lane's stomach.

"No, Mommy, Daddy." Lane's whines.

Trey kisses his head. "Just exhausted."

"Yeah."

"Let me carry you, Lane." Trey says taking him waking him up.

"Tremaine." I whisper.

Trey rocks him. "Shhh..."

I forget everyday my baby still 2. Still just a baby who gets overly tired and whiny. I kiss his shoulder. He was limp in Trey's arm after only a few steps. Trey was walking back to the house. I start walking in the water trying to figure out what my husband going through. I know I need help with him. I can't down play how serious this is.

Alex

I throw my bag on the floor. Hidia screams.

"Hey, Bestie." She says throwing her arm over my shoulder.

"Bitch, I am tired." I snap looking around the room. "This is tacky. These walls are so ugly and look at this old furniture."

Hidia drops her arms to her side. "Are you paying to stay here?"

"No."

"Okay then. You were saying?"

I look around the room. "Those are some nice seashells."

"Okay!" Hidia yells. "Baby daddy finally gonna come meet people. You know his Mexican ass don't like black people. I'm like you fucking racist. I'm black."

"Your pussy not though."

"Shut up." She snaps. "Cause he loves to say... are you sure baby? It was dark that first time. Dirty Mexican."

I laugh. "Girl, Bye. Ain't he like an army brat that was born at a base in Honduras or some shit? Girl..."

She flips her hand in the air. "Whatever liar. You not feeling cute booty."

"I'm not. I'm using him."

"He got good dick?" She stares at me.

I roll my eyes, walk to the bathroom, and close the door. Hidia is annoying. That's not gonna get rid of her. I peek out into the room. Wait... it got rid of her? I change clothes then head out to the water where I was told everyone was. I look around. No Cammie or Trey.

"Aye, who you here with?" MiMi's husband asks pointing to me.

I sit down reaching into the pit to grab a stick thats just sitting there. I ignore him a little bit longer until he gets everybody's attention. Chris looks around Sevyn at me.

"Oh you came here with her?" Chris asks looking at Jamaal.

"I..." Jamaal starts.

I take a potato off of the kabob then interrupt him. "We work together."

"Yeah?" Jamaal says. "That's it?"

"Jamaal?" I say cutting my eyes at him.

Chris starts laughing. "Yeah, that's how they do."

"That's how who does?" I snap.

"You Roberson women." Chris says moving back behind Sevyn. She so beautiful sitting there quiet.

I suck my teeth. "Roberson women?"

"Do you all hate your soulmates?"

"And have that one friend that wish he could have been the soul mate? Actually no."

He looks around Sevyn again at me with a pissed look then he roars with laughter. "Jamaal my man you just came up in the game."

"For what?"

"Ewh, don't say scoring a Roberson. Just don't say nothing." Hidia says out of nowhere. "Where Cammie?"

Sevyn winks at me. "So it's an achievement to have a Roberson woman? He gets applauded because he snatched her?"

Chris hides his face again. "You flexing man. Don't think that deep into it."

"Should have snatched her first. Weren't you just single at the wedding?"

"Yall doing too much." MiMi's husband says.

"Right." Chris adds.

I roll my eyes. We still off the subject of me and Jamaal so fuck it. He smirks at me. Bruh I done told you what this was about. I roll my eyes again. It doesn't stop him from staring at me. I throw the bell pepper at him.

"Those not even done." Chris declares from behind Sevyn.

"So Sevyn... Amber?" I say. She shrugs. "What shitty hell hole you crawled into to make you snatch up this piece of shit?"

She giggles turning to him. He was pissed. He comes back into view. "Piece of shit? Don't let what I said go to your fucking head."

"Why you not trying to be my bestie on the side?"

"Why you fucking with the man?"

"His ego. Cause I'm not fucking him." I say then shrug. "Exactly why I don't have to stroke his ego."

Jamaal huffs. "You wouldn't stroke no man's ego."

"Damn, right cause my dick too big."

"You need to fucking take her back. You work with her?" MiMi's husband says.

"Hey, Bae." Cammie says hugging my back.

I turn my head. "The golden couple."

Cammie pushes the side of my head. "Demon be gone."

"That's how you shut her up?" Chris nods.

"Try it motherfucker." I spat.

Chris makes his eyes big sitting back. He suddenly gets a shit load of energy sitting up and scaring the shit out of Sevyn. She frowns then stands up slowly. That nigga is something crazy.

"Where are you going now? Everybody over here." Chris spazzes.

"To put Lane to bed." Cammie says turning around.

Chris sucks his teeth. "It take two of you?"

Cammie turns around briefly. "Chris, you and Trey can put him to bed if you like."

"Naw, you good." Chris says like he was nonchalant before.

"Tell MiMi to bring her ass out here." Her husband says.

"Chris did you make me one like the one you had?" Cammie whines.

Chris doesn't say right away. He moves again behind Sevyn then he laughs.

"Christofuckface!"

"Go ahead." He says. "It's right there burning."

She spins around walking towards the house. Trey had already went into the house. He weird as shit. Both of them are weird. Trey and Chris. I grab a mini wine bottle out of a cooler near me. Well now. Fancy shit. Hidia had told me that Chris did all of this for Cammie and Trey. Something about an apology. Wonder what he did.

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