#maybe easiest to put effort in when I know it's gonna be seen by someone I care about and not just me

[guard-en]

realized the sheer quantity of gift art I make. girl why are you so santa claw

#random eden rants #i do love makin stuff for people sure as the dawn right as rain fuckin love it #i just like. rubs my chin. maybe theres something to observe here #maybe easiest to put effort in when I know it's gonna be seen by someone I care about and not just me #also any collaborative art is my bread and butter I need to do more collab stuff n art trades #also all this not to say. its particularly good gift art theres just a lot of it

[imidio]

General rambling about Eldarya and questionable direction choices

Oh gods, that’s gonna be long. Actually, I don’t play Eldarya anymore, it just feels like a waste of time right now. But fortunately, a lot of my friends are still brave enough to continue, so I have a lot of insight in what’s actually happening in the game.

I’m writing this mostly because of this post, or rather, the article that was mentioned in it. It is mostly the Eldarya writer’s response to all the criticism from the players and oh boy… Not going into details because some people actually did this, but just quick summary of my personal opinion after reading this (just my thoughts regarding Eldarya, I’m not even going to mention the attitude that shows in the article): I somehow feel like the person writing Eldarya doesn’t like the game as a whole – the genre, target, setting. I heard from people that play MCL Alternate Life that it’s actually pretty good so maybe the fantasy part is the problem? Or it can also be lack of solid preparation to write something like this.

Anyway, as for my thoughts regarding Eldarya.

1. They don’t know its players

Actually, no, more than that. I feel like they don’t have any specific target in mind. Beemov games started when most of us was like 12-14. But the thing is, now we are mostly adults and younger people don’t seem to be so eager to join the fandom (not that the games have anything to offer to younger players, I mean, for example playing Eldarya before unlocking the market is absolutely devastating experience). And right now we have a game that is trying to be everything. For some parts, I feel like this is written for children. But then we go to the more heavy themes that would be either not suitable for their age, or simply boring for them. In the same time, this “heavy stuff” I’m talking about feels so unrealistic and grotesque that despite efforts, you just can’t take it seriously. And with this we go to the second part.

2. Because they don’t know their own players, they don’t know what genre should they even make. And how to approach it.

But, really – if you’d have to tell someone, what Eldarya is – what would you tell them? Their main page is saying “romance and adventure fantasy game”. In the google play, it’s tagged as otome. The writer’s words: fantasy adventure series - what, you could say, also shows that the romance is so low on his priority list that he doesn’t even mention it – could be just understatement but I feel like it’s worthy to point out. So, what we get if we sum this up – three keywords – romance, fantasy, adventure.

As for romance… We all know what it’s like right now. As someone that was aiming for the Lance’s route, all I can do is laugh. To be honest, I’ve never believed this will be good route. I like the trope, but this just couldn’t go well with everything we’ve seen before, especially with only 20 episodes. I’m not sure if it’s worse than what I thought it will be, but definitely is no good. Emotions are non-existent. Everything is just… dry. Narration tells me that characters feel certain way but I just don’t see it, I don’t know why, I don’t feel anything. Those rare romance scenes we get are so out of place that you can think someone in the team was like: “Wait, I forgot there was supposed to be romance in the game! Let’s just throw some random kiss here, yeah, that will be great!”. Absolutely meaningless.

Fantasy? Right… You know, if you read/played/watched a lot of fantasy genre, you know that making it good is not about “oh, let’s put magic and dragons here”. From my experience it can be either the easiest or the hardest genre possible, depending on the writer. You don’t have restrictions. You don’t have to do boring research on “how the law works in this country at the other side of the ocean in terms of what I need here” for this to be coherent. Creative freedom 100%, you can do anything, rules from our world don’t matter and yet, you can use some of them which will make your work easier. You don’t even have to be Tolkien or Sanderson, with their fantasy worlds that have been created from scratch in every little detail for over 10 years. You don’t need explanation for everything, you can make it simple – just make it work and stand by the rules you’ve already made. We have magic in Eldarya, but actually we don’t. How many times did you see characters actually using it? I’m not counting alchemy here, just pure magic. Kero used telekinesis ONCE. In TO tutorial if I remember correctly. Or one of the first episodes. I don’t feel like the magic is integral part of this world so how could it be convincing when they suddenly use some strange spell/ritual/thingy to solve a major problem important for the main plot (let’s not even start this whole discussion on how it’s not really a good idea to use pure magic powers to solve a problem, especially if you didn’t introduce those powers ).

And now, with the most recent episodes – fantasy… yeah. Someone on our discord server said something that sums it up pretty well – Eldarya is right now something like MCL but with explaining us in most stupid ways possible how our own world works.

And adventure… Well, I could make a whole post about “everything wrong with” for just that one part. Let’s start with – why on earth did they choose military conflict as a main plot for this game? Don’t get me wrong, I love fantasy with those type of conflict, I really do. But it’s also very difficult and requires research – and here it is non-existent. Some time ago, with a couple of friends, we’ve been discussing 30 episode of TO, or rather, the battle itself. I’m not going to do this again, it would be way to long. But – if you’ve watched GOT, especially the last season. If you’ve seen Battle of Winterfell. And if you’ve seen some analysis of everything that went wrong with it from the tactical point of view. Yeah, Eldarya repeated every single mistake and added some more. If you’re curious about those things, just go to youtube, a lot of experts explained it very well – I’m sure you’ll see similarities. If you’re not –

Look at the map. HQ is really solid place for defence. We have hill, high walls and the cliff on the other side, so there is only one side for the potential assault. Wall is the perfect place for archers, crossbowmans and mages. While defending the city, you take advantage of it – especially of its walls – to the maximum. What you DON’T do, is going outside of those walls with your forces, to fight a battle on the BEACH. I guess most of us have walked on a sand at least once. Yeah, imagine fighting on that kind of terrain. And Lance’s army? Attacking from the beach side, really? He’s a dragon, they could literally fly with him and chose best place possible, and they chose BEACH? Just imagine them, walking one by one, just like some ducklings, up those very narrow, rock stairs that lead to the HQ. And that’s just the top of the iceberg.

In ANE on the other hand – we have diplomatic mission, for example. Here there is no point of telling what was wrong with it – there wasn’t a single thing that was right. They came to the ruler and king of the country they’d like to cooperate with in a way. What are first things they do? 1. Show of power. 2. Disrespect for the monarch (I don’t care right now what he’s like, he’s still a monarch and a ruler). 3. Going there with the very person he’s in power conflict with, also being his past wife (and probably present wife by law), a refugee that they gave an asylum in the guard. Telling him no, we won’t hand her over to you. Well, if that is not provocation then I don’t know what is.

I’m not telling that they should create great and realistic plot with R. R. Martin’s level of politics and complicated military situation. I mean, I would be delighted, but I’d be in minority, most of players would be bored by it. But! There are already things that are doing really good job (in my opinion) with simplifications! A Ranger’s Apprentice for example, or The Powder Mage Trilogy. Both of them touch the topic, in completely different ways, but both of them work on the simplified concepts of complex conflict (also military conflict). What I think makes them work is the fact that the authors did really good job with their research. In Ranger’s Apprentice you can find a lot of concepts that are brought up in The Art of War by Sun Tzu. They are simple concepts by themselves – but they are real and logical. What Flanagan did was probably taking some of them and making them the main focus for the certain part of the plot. You read about some kind of the tactic characters use – it’s nothing complicated by itself but just feel like it could work – of course it does, because it did through the real history. It’s just simplified, and with the simple narration it makes the books fun even for the younger audience – and not grotesque for older one, as long as you understand and accept existence of those simplifications. This is what Eldarya lacks. It tries to bring up complicated topics in simplified way, but you just cannot do this from nothing. We are not strategists or tacticians – but we can read and take inspiration from other sources. With a little of logical thinking on top of that, it is possible.

They could do all of that. Or they could just stick to the things that worked perfectly fine. I mean the very beginning of the Eldarya: TO. It was simple – we had clear main goal – collecting Crystal shards. We had some problems that we had to overcome – food shortage, human organizations, Ashkore (rest in peace, my favourite character :< ) and the fact that the guard leader was young and inexperienced what made her more likely to make mistakes. We also had enough space for our love interests, enough time to get to know them, get attached to them (as a character, but also as a player), get some quality fluff we deserved. Personally, I think this simple problems would be much more fitting for the game like Eldarya that despite being fantasy and adventure, more than anything should focus on romance. Generally I think Eldarya right now lacks everything that would make the game good – there is no real direction, no real idea, no research, and most importantly, no passion from the creators (or if it’s there, sorry but I don’t feel it). It just feel like a project everyone in the team is tired of creating, would love nothing more than to throw it away and never ever look at it again, but just cannot stop right now because they have to finish is somehow. You know, the kind of feeling you get when you’re at the end of writing your thesis. And it’s sad. Because it had potential – not the kind of potential like masterpieces in the gaming world, but enough potential to become really fun game that you play as a form of relax after a hard day in job/school, also donating it once in a while as a form of appreciation for the creator’s work. I could write even more but it’s already almost 2000 words so I’ll stop here.

Summary: they don’t know what to do but also won’t listen to their own players because of reasons. Result – no one gets what they want. Oh, also, one last but very important thing! I don't like the concept of aengel powers AT ALL. I think Gardienne should be simple human or have powers so limited that they could just support her but not solve the problems for her. Why? Because maybe that way we could see solid character development, MC that relies on abilities that was earned and not handed over to her. Working with her own creativity, problem-solving skills and the knowledge she gained during both her life on Earth and in Eldarya. Right now, everything that defines her and her abilities - are her powers (and what's funny is the fact that writers KNOW this and shamelessly throw this on us whenever possible - you know, all the "now with my powers I'm invincible" rambling). Yep, now I'm done for real. xD

#eldarya #eldarya rambles #eldarya ane #eldarya spoilers #beemoov #my personal rambling #i miss my Ashkore #eldarya the origins #it took me too long to write this but I had to do this

[narutogwriting]

Ruin the Friendship

⋇✦ Pairing: Naruto Uzumaki x Reader

⋇✦ Genre: angst; fluff; oneshot

⋇✦ CW: none

⋇✦ Length: 2.5k+

⋇✦ @gaarasandpit just a angst/fluff naruto x reader request if you’re up for it 🥰 maybe where the reader and him are somewhat close friends and he notices she’s drifting from him because her feelings get in the way? he’s oblivious and hurt about it then confrontation happens ending up in a good old love confession

“Cmon! Open up!” Naruto called from outside your house, pounding on the door like he had been incessantly for the past five minutes. “I know you’re in there!”

He did not, in fact, know whether or not you were in there, but he couldn’t imagine where else you would be.

All week you’d been missing; Naruto couldn’t find you anywhere. Sometimes he would see the flick of your hair from the corner of his eye or his ears would pick up the sound of your laugh, but by the time he turned to find you, you’d be gone.

Your absence in Naruto’s life wasn’t something of a minor inconvenience; it was a constant pain, as if he was missing a part of his own body. Iruka had joked that Naruto missing you was akin to that of a phantom limb, like there was something of him that should be there and it wasn’t and he ached because of it.

“No, Naruto. We haven’t seen her,” Shikamaru shrugged. Ino nodded her agreement.

“Sorry. Maybe she’s on a mission or something.

Naruto frowned, sighing in frustration. “Alright, well, thanks.” He muttered before he sulked off. Shikamaru and Ino watched him go, waiting until he disappeared before Ino gave you a kick under the table.

“Ow!” you whined as you crawled out from underneath, rubbing your shoulder.

Ino rolled her eyes at you. “You’re lucky Naruto’s an idiot, or he definitely would have seen you.” She told you as you slid yourself down into the seat next to her. “Remind me: why are you avoiding him again?”

Propping your elbows on the table, you rested your head in your hands as you gave a forlorn sigh. That was a loaded question. You were avoiding Naruto because the absolute worse thing that could ever occur had happened.

You’d fallen in love with the idiot blond.

And how could you not? You’d been best friends with Naruto for the longest time. He was a constant in your life, always at your side. It was rare that one of you was seen without the other.

There was no one in the entire world that could make you smile or laugh the way that he could. Whenever you were sad or hurt, he always had the words to make it all better. Naruto had the type of smile that could save people, and you were no exception. There wasn’t a person in the world that could meet someone with a heart like Naruto’s and not walk away changed.

It had been a slow thing, a soft, unsure growing. It wasn’t a feeling you’d recognized at all once, because you always loved Naruto.

It wasn’t totally strange for you to get excited when you saw him or miss him when he was gone. It wasn’t unusual to think about him before you went to sleep.

But when you began to wake up and your first thought was, “my god he’s beautiful” when you looked at the picture of the two of you on your night stand, that was a little strange. You never used to spend extra time in the morning doing your makeup when you knew you were going to see him soon.

And you never used to blush when he smiled at you. Even you could tell you laughed a little too hard when he said something even remotely funny.

It was one day when the two of you were taking a walk that it happened. He was telling you a story, his motions large and exaggerated. Of course, he wasn’t paying attention to where he was going. As he turned to you, arms raised high over his head, his foot hit a rock. Naruto went sprawling to the floor, rolling across the ground and landing flat on his back.

You burst out laughing at the scene, hurrying to kneel at his side. “Are you okay!?” You asked him between giggles.

Naruto’s face was bright red with embarrassment as he laid on the floor. He looked up at you, smiling sheepishly. “Oops…”

It was such a simple thing, but you’d looked at Naruto and thought, “I love him so much.”

Nothing had ever startled you more.

Of course you loved Naruto; that was a given. It was never anything that needed to be thought or said. It was just a fact. But as soon as you had thought the words, you knew that it was different this time. You didn’t just love Naruto.

You were in love with him.

You’d hoped that the feelings would fade. Maybe it was just a fluke or a passing crush. Day in and day out, you waited for your feelings to go back to normal, but now that you’d acknowledged them, they only seemed to grow stronger. It got to the point where you couldn’t even look at naruto without turning into a blushing mess. It was pathetic.

So you’d decided there was only one reasonable solution: you would have to avoid him for as long as it took for the feelings to go away.

And of course you didn’t want to stay away from him. Being with him was as natural as breathing. But the way you saw it, if he found out about your feelings, your friendship could be ruined forever. This way, you could take some space, move on, and resume your friendship like nothing happened.

But Naruto wasn’t making that easy.

You hadn’t realized just how much time you and Naruto spent together until you were trying to distance yourself from him. He was everywhere. Every meal, every free moment, he was by your side or trying to be at least.

“Wanna go eat?” “Wanna go train with me?” “Let’s watch a movie!” “I heard there’s gonna be a festival in the next town over!”

You couldn’t get away from him. So this past week, you’d taken to hiding from him every time you saw him, deciding it was easiest to just avoid him completely. In all honesty, you couldn’t believe just how much time and effort Naruto was putting in to trying to find you.

But of course he was putting in effort. Because you were his best friend and he couldn’t understand it; where you’d gone or why you weren’t talking to him. Had he done something wrong? Were you mad at him or something? Your absence in Naruto’s life was drawing out every insecurity he hadn’t even realized he still had. He was worried, drowning in anxiety.

What if you’d decided you didn’t want to be his friend anymore? Maybe you were annoyed with him, found him to be too much. When you and Naruto had first become friends, he thought it was too good to be true. There was no way that someone as nice and pretty and cool as you would want to be friends with him. No one had ever wanted to be his friend before.

But there you were with your sweet smile and calming presence. You had accepted Naruto, every piece of him, without question or reservation. You meant everything to him, so the thought of losing you had sent Naruto into a panic.

You’d managed to avoid Naruto for a full week and a half. The past three days, as far as you knew, he hadn’t even made an effort to find you. It was a relief and heartbreaking all at once. You needed your space, but it hurt to think that maybe Naruto didn’t miss you at all anymore.

These were the thoughts racing through your head when you crawled into bed that night. You doubted you’d be getting much sleep; you’d barely gotten any since you had started avoiding Naruto.

Pulling the covers over yourself, you closed your eyes and tried to get comfortable. It seemed like hours you laid there awake before tiredness finally started to drift over you. You could feel yourself slowly dozing off to sleep when a sudden loud noise startled you awake. Sitting up quickly, your eyes darted to the window where the noise had come from.

Naruto had forcefully pried open the window, shoving himself not-so-gracefully through the opening and crashing onto the floor.

He quickly jumped to his feet, rubbing his head with a small wince before his eyes landed on you, widening slightly.

“Ah ha! I got you!” He shouted victoriously, pointing his finger in your direction. “You can’t hide from me anymore, believe it!”

God, he was too cute for words and that was exactly the problem. Your heart practically burst just looking at him as he appeared so accomplished and excited.

But the triumphant look on his face slowly vanished as he stared at you. When he spoke, his voice came out quietly, dripping with dejection. “Where have you been?”

Quietness settled over the room as the two of you stared at each other. Naruto made no move to get closer to you, and you likewise stayed strapped in your seat. “I’m sorry…” You offered weakly, unsure of what else to say.

“Don’t be sorry!” Naruto snapped, anger quickly replacing his despaired features. “Tell me why! What the hell? You think you can just avoid a guy? Cut me off like I’m nothing to you!?” He was trembling, his usual happy grin twisted into a broken grimace so despondent it took you off guard. You had caused that hurt that Naruto was feeling. The thought made you sick.

“If you don’t want to be my friend anymore, at least say something!” Naruto spat. “Don’t just run from me like a coward! If you have something to say, say it to my face!”

There was a harsh edge to Naruto’s voice that he never used with you before. Not in all of your years of friendship. You realized suddenly just how badly you’d hurt Naruto by avoiding him. It wasn’t something you’d considered; you’d only wanted some space so you could get back to normal with him.

But you saw it clearly now, the damage that you had done. Suddenly, in this moment, he was the lonely, isolated child that he had been before you met, feeling alone and abandoned in the world. And this time, it was because of you.

The regret was like bile on your tongue, and you wished fiercely that you could take back the past week and do it differently. You couldn’t stand the thought that it was you who had caused this damage to your best friend, the guy you loved so much.

You didn’t have any words to fix it. All you had was the truth.

“I love you.”

The words slipped from your mouth before you could pull them back in. And once they were out, they couldn’t be taken back.

Confusion quickly settled on Naruto’s face. It was as if you could see the anger dissipate from his body. He stared at you, mouth slightly agape, while he tried to process what you’d just said. “You… What?”

Turning bright red, you pulled the blanket back over your head in embarrassment. You couldn’t believe you’d just said that! Now there would never be any going back to the way that things were, but you had to tell him. You couldn’t just let him think that you were cutting him off without reason.

“I said I love you…” You muttered from under the blanket. “I’m in love with you, Naruto. I have been for a while now, and I didn’t want to ruin our friendship. So I thought if I just took some space and didn’t see you for a while, then maybe I would get over it, and then we could just keep things the way they were…”

It was much easier to get the words out when you were under the blanket and couldn’t see him, but you were still nauseous with anxiety as you told him how you felt. Your heart was steeling itself for rejection as you waited for his response.

The only noise was shuffling as Naruto came to your bed. You could feel the indent as he sat down next to you. He grabbed your blanket, slowly peeling it off of you and despite your reluctance, you let him.

You didn’t look at him as you pushed yourself back up into a sitting position. You’d never been so embarrassed before.

“Did it work?” He asked you quietly.

Fidgeting with the hem of your night shirt, you mumbled, “Did what work?”

“Are you over me?”

The question took you off guard, lingering between the two of you, and you couldn’t help but flicker your eyes to his. He was staring earnestly at you with those wide blue eyes you loved so much. You wanted to lie to him but you just couldn’t.

“No.”

Naruto’s focused expression stretched into a wide grin as he wrapped his arms around you, hugging you to him. You were too startled to respond, so you just stared at him, confused, instead.

“You scared me!” Naruto laughed happily as he rested his cheek against your head. “I thought you didn’t want to be my friend anymore! You didn’t have to completely avoid me, ya know.”

There was a mix of relief and disappointment at his reaction. So, he wasn’t weirded out about your confession? Things didn’t have to change. The two of you could stay ‘just friends.’

“So, we’re okay?” You asked him nervously. “We’re still friends?”

Naruto gave a puzzled hum as he pulled away from the hug to stare at you. He raised his eyebrow as he studied you for a moment. You could almost see the light bulb go off above his head as he realized.

“Oh!” He laughed, grinning sheepishly and rubbing his neck. “I guess I forgot to tell you it back, huh? I thought it was obvious! I love you too, believe it!”

You blinked as he giggled embarrassedly, that signature smile of his on his lips. “Naruto!” You snapped at him, lunging and knocking you both off the bed. He landed on his back with you on top of him as you rubbed your fist into his head. “You dummy!”

“Hey! Cut it out!” Naruto whined, squirming under your touch. “Is that any way to treat your boyfriend!?”

The question was enough to make you stop, your mouth frozen in a surprised “o” shape, just like he hoped. He laughed, sitting up and holding you to him before he placed a happy kiss to your cheek, making your face flush over red.

You placed your hands on his shoulders, looking at him as it finally sunk in what he said. He loved you too. He called himself your boyfriend. “Is that your way of asking me?” You questioned.

Naruto nodded earnestly. “And my way to get you to stop giving me a noogie! It’s a win win! Well, if you say yes, that is…”

Shaking your head, you laughed as your whole body softened in relief. Your arms slipped around his neck as you hugged him tightly. “Yes, obviously!” You told him. “Yes! I love you.” Naruto hugged you back just as fiercely. When he finally pulled away, he didn’t hesitate. His hand reached up to cup your cheek as he leaned forward, pressing a sweet, soft kiss to your lips.

Well, you guessed your friendship was officially ruined. But suddenly, you didn’t mind so much.

#naruto #naruto uzumaki #naruto hc #naruto uzumaki hc #naruto headcanon #naruto headcanons #naruto uzumaki headcanons #naruto uzumaki headcanon #naruto imagine #naruto imagines #naruto uzumaki imagine #naruto uzumaki imagines #naruto drabble #naruto uzumaki drabble #naruto drabbles #naruto uzumaki drabbles #naruto x reader #naruto x oc #naruto uzumaki x reader #naruto uzumaki x oc #naruto ff #naruto fanfiction #naruto uzumaki ff #naruto uzumaki fanfiction #naruto oneshot #naruto one shot #naruto uzumaki one shot #naruto uzumaki oneshot #naruto fluff #naruto angst

[devildomimagines]

could we maybe get the brothers' reactions to an mc that has a lot of bottled up anger issues? kinda similar to how satan is with his wrath, but they just... can't stay mad for very long; they can be upset, sure, but mad? angry, even?? maybe for like, idk, a minute before it just fizzles out.

Sure thing! I love exploring emotions so let's go~

Belphegor

He doesn’t totally understand the rage but he’s lived with Satan long enough.

Though don’t get him wrong, he’s been angry before, frustrated and grieving to the point of murder *cough* but typically he doesn’t have the energy to expend.

Belphie definitely knows the feeling of fatigue once the anger has run its course and left you burnt out.

He offers you support in those moments, calm and quiet so as to not fan the embers.

If he’s awake, he recognizes the first signs of your anger. Your short replies, the tension in your jaw and the way your fists clench and unclench.

He’s never seen you let loose but he secretly wants to see the destruction you could cause.

If he catches it in time, he’ll pull you away from the situation, claiming he needed you for a nap.

Beelzebub

The same as his twin, not typically angry but understands from being around Satan.

The only times you can remember seeing him in a fit of anger were when he was denied food one too many times or when his team lost their Fangol match.

Beel doesn’t think you would be as explosive as he has seen Satan be but he also doesn’t want to take the chance and have you get in trouble.

I like to think he’s pretty attuned to his human, he can sense when their heart rate raises or feel the tension in the air when their anger flares.

He immediately takes steps to extricate you, even if that means throwing you over his shoulder and booking it out the door.

I think he would go to Satan for things that he does to calm down to try to help you. He wouldn’t name you, to keep your privacy, but unfortunately he’s a terrible liar so it’s pretty obvious.

Since he’s built like a brick house, he offers to be your punching bag if you ever need it, he swears he wouldn’t feel a thing. It’s tough to stay mad long enough to take him up on that offer but it’s appreciated.

Asmodeus

I think Asmo has the best understanding of wrath having heard it from the source directly.

Satan has monologued Asmo’s ear off about everything from how he felt to how he dealt with it.

When Asmo sees the same anger in you, he immediately jumps in, just as he would with Satan.

The only thing that won’t work on you would be Asmo’s charmspeak. Since you aren’t affected by his Avatar, he can’t sweet talk you down off fury’s ledge.

He knows other tricks, breathing exercises or distractions work just as well and he’s noticed you’re much quicker to recover than Satan would be.

He worries for the times you’re not with him, would you use his tricks or would you let the anger fester and bubble up under the surface?

The easiest solution in his eyes is to always be with you, no need to worry if he’s always available to you.

Satan

Satan has felt the familiar pangs of wrath coming from you previously and he gets it. Good lord does he get it. He’s never related to someone more than you, once you’ve disclosed this about yourself.

He nods when you describe it as the anger starting out slow and red-hot like lava creeping through every vein in your body. 

Then it’s all consuming and all you can feel is the fire of wrath. In those moments you recognize the need to punch, kick, or scream; something to relieve the fury.

But before you can act on it, the rage is gone. You’re left charred and feeling empty inside; the fire having consumed your being and left nothing alive.

He can share various things he’s learned to keep his own wrath at bay but it doesn’t always help so he’s promised to be your outlet when you need to let go.

He’d rather you explode at him than finding you in the aftermath of being burnt out. It breaks his heart when you give him that look that both says “you’re too late” and “I’m sorry, I tried.”

Satan would never be disappointed in you, so he reassures you all the time, “There’s no need to bottle up your emotions around me.”

Leviathan

We’ve all seen him get angry in game, mostly exploding at Mammon.

In those situations, when he’s comfortable, he’s very expressive, but more than the other brothers, he understands bottling up undesirable emotions that you don’t want to deal with or have others deal with.

He knows firsthand how that doesn’t help, if anything it escalates the issue in your own head. It’s like an echochamber of all your worst thoughts being amplified.

Levi offers to always listen to you rant, wherever, whenever. It’s the middle of the night and Beel’s destroying the kitchen on the other side of your bedroom wall for the 6th night that week? Give him a call. Asmo dragged you out to a club and you’re tired and want to come home? Call him, he’ll come get you. Mammon sold one of your personal items? He will gladly add it to the list of things he pesters Mammon about.

Just as you have listened to his rants on video games, anime or manga, he’ll be there to listen to your rants if it helps your anger.

He doesn’t know specific techniques to help but he can offer examples of what they did in the anime, “My Roommate Leaves Dirty Dishes in the Sink for so Long That They Get Moldy and Now I Need to Use One of the Moldy Dishes. Is It Passive Aggressive to Ask Them to do the Dishes or is it Just Aggressive?”

If you don’t want to talk about it then he’ll offer to take out your anger on some video game baddies as a substitute.

Mammon

Not gonna lie, he might be the cause of your anger sometimes.

When he’s not going through your things, he’s pretty clingy and a bit pushy. He doesn’t always say what he means and talks himself in circles when he doesn’t want to admit to something. It can be annoying if your personality doesn’t mesh well with that.

Mammon is, however, very quick to pick up on the shift in your demeanor. 

He’ll roll back his last action whatever it may be. If he threw an arm around your shoulder, he’d remove it. If he made a joke, he takes it back and apologizes. 

If it wasn’t something he did then he jumps to your defense, often putting himself in between you and the offending party.

He usually gives Satan space but Mammon wants to help you if he can.

I could see him being very sweet to you after an episode, trying to soothe the edges that came undone, even if only for a second.

Lucifer

King of swallowing emotions, let me tell you.

If you wanted advice on how to not bottle your emotions, this is not the demon for you.

He does understand the rage though. How it burns and devastates anything that comes in contact and how it can take on a life of its own……

Lord Diavolo help you if this is ever directed at Lucifer but if it’s not then he will happily offer his services to smite the cause.

Lucifer may worry that your wrath feeds off of and develops with Satan’s. The worst possibility being you start feeling resentment towards him just like the fourth born.

He will learn your triggers and will make an effort to avoid them if possible to keep your anger to a minimum.

Lucifer will always be available to talk to and would be comforting and accommodating behind closed doors.

#obey me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me asmodeus #obey me satan #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #my writing #anon squad #I got carried away with Satan's lol how could I not haha

[extasiswings]

Get in, clowns.  We’re going to the circus.  On ao3.

Eddie’s palms are sweaty.

It’s warm outside, the sun beating down on the park bench where he’s sitting, but it’s the nerves that have his hands clammy as he turns his water bottle over between them.  

When Buck had walked in the house earlier, he’d taken one look at Eddie and rolled his eyes before shoving him back into his bedroom.

“You can’t wear that,” Buck said, rifling through Eddie’s dresser.  He emerged with Eddie’s tightest pair of jeans and shoved them at his chest before turning to the drawers with shirts.

“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” Eddie asked, baffled as he looked down at himself and then, skeptically, at the jeans.

“You look like a dad.”  Buck’s voice went muffled for a moment before he made a noise of victory and pulled out a deep red, long-sleeved shirt that Eddie’s pretty sure is at least a size too small. 

“Kind of hard not to.  Since I am one and all.  That’s not exactly a secret.”

“Yeah, but you can look like a hot dad who is making an effort instead of a regular dad going to the grocery store or something.  You’ll thank me later.”  

After Eddie had changed and walked out of the bathroom, Buck’s face shifted—Eddie could have sworn his eyes darkened, that his voice was rougher as he pronounced Eddie much better.

So Eddie knows he looks good.

But his palms are still sweaty.  He uncaps the water bottle and takes a sip more to have something to do than because he needs it.  And then he starts drumming his fingers against his thigh, needing something to occupy them, some way to move.  

He’s tempted to pull out his phone, to reread the latest texts from Bobby or even the shameless teasing in the group text that Buck started with his sisters—and boy, was that a mistake, putting the three of them in touch, because Eddie never in a million years would have told them he was going on a date if he hadn’t done it by accident because Buck’s direct messages happened to be right below the group—

He’s still not sure he should be, is the thing.  Dating.  He still feels like he can’t quite breathe right when he thinks too hard about it.  Can still play that last dinner with Shannon over on loop, from her asking for a divorce to the implication that really being with him again would be so terrible she would have to run for the hills and leave their child behind.

He didn’t exactly have great self-esteem to begin with.

Eddie wipes his palms on his jeans—he’s in the middle of debating whether it’s bad parenting to make up an emergency involving your kid to get out of a date, when—

“Eddie!  Hi,” Ana greets, walking up the path.  

The anxiety in his chest twists tighter as he gets up from the bench and waves.

“Hey.  You, uh—you look really nice,” he says, because it’s true and also the easiest thing he can remember from the last time he did this.  

Ana smiles.  “So do you.”

There’s a pause that lingers a little too long and then they both start trying to speak at once, cutting off abruptly when they realize.  Eddie rubs self-consciously at the back of his neck.

“Should we walk?” Ana offers, nodding down the path where it leads into the trees.

“Sure, yeah,” Eddie agrees.  

It’s actually not...bad.  She asks him about work and that’s a safe enough topic that he’s comfortable spending a few minutes telling her stories from the station.  She shares a little about the challenges of virtual teaching.  And then she asks about Chris, and, well, that’s an easy subject—Eddie could talk about Chris all day.  

He just finishes the story about the actual building of Christopher’s skateboard—which involved no small amount of comical trial and error on the part of two decidedly not Chris-sized grown men—when Ana gets a thoughtful look on her face and glances sideways at him.

“Can I ask you something personal?”  She asks.

Eddie rocks back on his heels and hooks his thumbs in his pockets.  “Sure.”

“How long has it been for you?”

Eddie’s eyebrows shoot up.  “Since...the last time I dated?”

Ana nods.

“Well…” He wets his lips to stall.  “The last person I dated was my wife.  And I’m not sure it was really dating in the same way after we were married so...I guess...eleven years give or take?”

He laughs and he can hear the edge of self-deprecation.  “That obvious I’m out of practice?”

“No,” Ana says.  “No, that wasn’t—it’s really not actually. Although it does explain some things.”

“Things?”

She bites her lip.  “Nothing bad,” she insists.  “Just—”

“Have you ever been on a date where the other person talked about their ex the whole time and it was kind of obvious they still had feelings for them and you couldn’t help wondering why they weren’t with the ex when they clearly wanted to be?”  She asks.

Eddie blinks, scrolling back through their conversation trying to think—he’s pretty sure he hasn’t mentioned Shannon except for the once.  And he’s not still—

“In high school, maybe?” He answers.  “But I’m not sure—”

“I was trying to figure out if you and Buck ever dated,” she clarifies, and Eddie stops in his tracks, his mind shorting out as he takes that in.

“I—what?”

They’re back at the parking lot anyway, and although they could take another loop around the park, Ana stops by the closest bench and smiles as she leans against it.

“Look, I like you, Eddie,” she says.  “And if I’m totally off base and you want to see me again, I will definitely pick up the phone.  But if I’m not?  I couldn’t not say something.”

“Buck’s my best friend,” Eddie replies.  His head is swimming but it surprisingly doesn’t feel bad.  More like he’s been handed the clue card for a puzzle he was trying to solve and while the pieces haven’t quite come together fully, they’re getting there.

“You talk about him like he’s your partner.  Like the three of you are a family.  And when you talk about him you look like…”  Ana shakes her head and laughs, but it’s not unkind.  Just soft and maybe a little longing.  “I would love for someone to look like that when they’re talking about me.  Thinking about me.  So, I thought you should know.  Just in case you didn’t.”

Another puzzle piece falls into place and Eddie sucks in a breath.

“I do like you,” he says.

“Yeah...but you’re in love with him.  Right?”  Eddie’s quiet and Ana nods.

“I’m gonna go,” she decides.  “This was nice, for the record.  Maybe we can do it again.  As friends next time.”

“Ana—” Eddie calls after her.  When she looks back over her shoulder though, he’s not sure what to say except, “...thank you.”

“Let me know how it works out?” She asks.  “I’m a little invested now.”

Eddie laughs and runs a hand through his hair.  “Yeah...sure.”  

He drives home in a daze, so much of the past two years—maybe even longer—suddenly thrown into new light.  Everything he’s been afraid of, everything that’s been holding him back—all of the baggage and insecurities that Shannon left behind, that have made him feel like he’s not good enough, like he can’t be a partner to anyone—

He never stopped and looked too hard at what he already had.  What he was already doing.

What he has.  What he is doing.   

With Buck.

In the stark glare of hindsight, it’s easy to see—he was still married when they met, was worn down and bruised and not looking for anything.  He needed a friend and Buck slipped in to fill that void and Eddie...put him in a box.  Put them in a box.  Carefully compartmentalizing every aspect of his life because it was easier that way, because it allowed him to sort through the tangled knots of expectation from any number of other sides, any number of other identities—husband, father, son.

There was no baggage attached to friend.  No forgive and forget and take your wife back because kids need their mothers or you’ll drag him down with you or I wasn’t enough.

There was just...Buck.  Present.  Supportive.  Caring about him.  Believing in him.   The real him—masks off, walls down, warts and all.   

The longer Eddie thinks, the clearer things become.  His mind flips through memories like a scrapbook—panic attacks and phone calls at two in the morning, nights on the couch playing video games with Christopher and the slower, lingering moments with just the two of them after they put him to bed, all those months sharing a bed in Buck’s apartment while he despaired over being away from his son and Buck reminded him he was a good dad—

How many of those nights had Eddie wanted to kiss him?  How many times had he felt that buzz under his skin, the whisper of it would be so easy, only to shove it down because it was too dangerous to deal with.  

And when he thinks now about the future, about having someone in his home, in his bed, in his life, when he pictures it, all he can see is Buck.

It feels right.

“I love him,” Eddie says out loud, tasting the words on his tongue, letting them linger.

I love him.

His pulse spikes with his anxiety, but it calms down as he sits with it.  Because he knows Buck’s not going to leave.  He trusts that.  Buck’s seen him at his worst and none of that has ever driven him away.  So maybe…

Eddie’s mind flicks back to earlier in the day, to the dark heat in Buck’s gaze as it dragged over him before he looked away.

...yeah.  They’ll be okay.

He’s home before he even really registers and takes a few slow breaths before he shuts off the truck and gets out.  When he steps through the door, it’s a strange feeling.  The space is familiar but not.  More...settled somehow.  Home.

Home.

Eddie closes the door behind him and follows the sound of running water to the kitchen.  He stops in the doorway, leaning against the frame, and spends a moment just watching Buck scrub potatoes in the sink until the other man glances up and notices him.

“Hey,” Buck greets.  “Chris is reading in his room, I’m just working on dinner.  How was the date?”

God, I love you, Eddie thinks, and nearly has to bite his tongue to keep it to himself.

Yeah.  It’s right.

He shrugs.  “It was fine.  Ana’s nice.”

“When’s the next date then?”  There’s an odd note in Buck’s voice that makes Eddie push off the frame and step closer. 

“There’s not going to be one,” he replies.  “Ana’s nice...but I don’t want to date her.”

Buck stops.  Shuts off the water and turns, leaning back against the sink.

“No?”  Buck’s brow furrows.  “It’s not—do you still feel like you’re not ready?”

“No, it’s not that,” Eddie replies.  “I do think I’m ready.  But with the right person.”

His heart is pounding in his chest, but it’s not fear.  More...anticipation.  

He swallows hard.

“Ana said something that made me realize that...I don’t want to start from scratch with some stranger.”

Eddie takes another step closer and Buck inhales sharply, emotions shifting across his face too quickly for Eddie to name them all.

“Eddie…”  Buck sounds hoarse, a little disbelieving.  He leans forward for a moment before shaking his head, clearing his throat.

“I can’t—I need you to be specific,” he says.  “Because I can’t make assumptions here, I can’t—”

Eddie kisses him.  Steps in far enough that Buck’s body presses flush against his, slides his hand around the back of Buck’s neck, and kisses him.  Buck makes a small noise and grips him right back, his hands curving around Eddie’s hips nearly tight enough to bruise in sharp contrast to the way Eddie’s mouth feathers against his, soft as anything.  

“Specific enough?”  Eddie breathes, staying close enough that their lips brush again.  Buck surges up and uses his grip on Eddie’s hips to turn them, pinning Eddie against the counter as he kisses him again in response.  Once, twice, three times, and Eddie shivers.  

He hasn’t been kissed in so long, hasn’t been touched with intention like this—he’d forgotten what it felt like.  His body floods with heat as Buck’s hands slip under his shirt, spreading wide over his rib cage, and he parts his lips eagerly for Buck’s tongue.

Down the hall, a door closes, and Buck jumps back, Eddie slumping against the counter to keep himself upright.  Buck is flushed and panting and Eddie’s pretty sure he can’t look much better, too warm and electric, wanting, wanting, wanting—

Both of them catch their breath and watch the door, but Christopher doesn’t appear.  After a minute Eddie catches the faint sound of a toilet flushing and he looks back at Buck.  

And he laughs.  It bubbles up from his chest like champagne fizz, bright and warm and right, and apparently it’s contagious because Buck starts up as well, stepping in again and sliding his arms around Eddie’s waist, ducking his head to laugh breathlessly against Eddie’s neck.

When they calm down, Buck stays close, his lips feathering over Eddie’s pulse.  Eddie hums and closes his eyes as he tips his head back to give Buck better access.  

“I’m in love with you,” he says.  “In case that wasn’t clear.”

Buck’s lips curve up against Eddie’s skin.

“Well that’s convenient,” he replies.  “Since Chris was asking me earlier why you couldn’t just date me if you were going to date again.”

Eddie’s startled into another laugh.  “Really?”

“Really.”

Eddie grins and opens his eyes again.  “Hey Buck?”

“Yeah?”

“Go out with me?”

Buck snorts and pushes him out of the way so he can go back to the potatoes.  

“Help me finish getting dinner together and we’ll see.”  But the second Eddie turns away, Buck snags him by a belt loop and reels him back in for another kiss.

“Yes,” Buck says.  “Yes.”

And it’s right.           

#chapel writes #buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie fic #911 fic

[whatiswhump]

Love your work, and would love another Bucky fanfic of Bucky in being involuntarily admitted to a psych hospital!!

Okay... so this is another one of after he's captured in CAWS, the poor boy is confused. Hurts much.

I'd also like to do one when he's more in his normal life and then has issues that require care.

(P.S. this is like a year late.... eep)

TW: Forced sedation, mental health, confusion

-

“He can’t be trusted on his own.”

“But does that mean we have to keep him as a prisoner? None of it was his fault.”

“No, that doesn’t change what he is capable of. He needs help and he needs to be kept away from the wrong people, this is our only option.”

The Soldier’s head lolled forward, he was fighting but the drugs were threatening to pull him under again. The men outside the holding cell were talking about him. With effort he dragged his gaze up to the reinforced window separating them from him. A coterie of men in suits and uniforms were watching him. Despite the heavy sedation that kept him crumpled on the floor he felt his face flush red in embarrassment, the pure helplessness of the situation-- he had new masters. He should have known he couldn’t stay gone. He would never be free-

That something like him was created to be owned and to be used.

“He’s been given enough sedation to take down a horse and somehow he’s still conscious. Kind of amazing.”

“Martin, you won’t think it’s so amazing when you’re the one tasked with keeping him docile.”

“I’m not worried about that, you know we have our methods. But it is hard to believe he’s the world’s most dangerous assassin when he’s drooling on the floor like that. Looks as harmless as a kitten.”

The soldier let his eyes fall. He didn’t even know why he was even trying to bother with listening to them. Why did it matter for him to figure out what they would do with him? It was foolish to even pretend like he had a choice.

If only he hadn’t squatted in that apartment for two nights in a row. He had gotten tired- no, lazy, it was no wonder they found him.

Now it would just be easiest if he let them do what they wanted. He didn’t want to fight anymore. If he was lucky maybe the Americans would wipe him again. At least then he wouldn’t have to be there for whatever they would make him do.

---

“Hey there, buddy. Can you look at me? Yeah attaboy, that’s it.” There was a bright light in his eyes, strong fingers were holding his chin. When he drowsily tried to pull away they tightened.

“Ah- ah, be a good boy, let me look at your eyes.”

The Soldier did as the man asked and stilled.

“Good,” The man cooed in a falsely gentle tone, “Not so much fight left anymore, huh?”

Don’t respond. He wasn’t allowed to respond to the scientists unless ordered. Pierce liked to punish him for that one.

“Damn they sure trained him, when does he snap out of the drooling mess and into an assassin?” A disembodied voice rang out from behind the man with the light.

The Soldier blinked again, were the scientists going to actually do something?

“He’s cleared for another dose, everything looks normal.”

“There’s my answer then. Hey James, time to take the little pills again.” The voice from behind was giddy, the soldier didn’t understand.

But then a cup was being foisted into his vision much too quickly and his head was being tilted back by another pair of hands. He opened his mouth willingly, perhaps they would actually knock him out for this experiment?

---

“Shit. I mean he wants to see him. We can’t very well say no to Captain America.”

“We can and we will. Mr. Barnes is much too unstable at the moment.”

“He’s already here and the director has already ordered that we allow it.”

Who was Mr. Barnes?

“Jesus, they’re gonna send him off the deep end again, he’s just barely responding as it is now. Doesn't even know where he is...”

“We’ll keep him restrained, it’ll be fine.”

The Soldier continued to stare at the wall that faced away from the cell door. They might stare at him but he at least liked to ignore it. He knew he wasn’t supposed to mind. Someone had told him that once. At least he thought? Someone with cold eyes.

---

They had him set up at a table, attached to a chair with a jacket with no ends to the sleeves that wrapped around himself.

He had forgotten himself as he sat there, empty. He remembered he was good at that.

A door opened but at first no one came through. The Soldier could only think that he was tired. He wished they’d put him back into cryo.

“Buck.”

A man had appeared, was standing right in front of him. He looked ... in pain?

“Hi, Bucky, they said you might not remember me,” The blonde man laughed uncertainly, “Judging by the look on your face, guess they were right.”

A sad smile replaced the wry one that had appeared during the laugh.

The Soldier stared back, confused. This didn't make sense.

“Is this a memory?” The Soldier couldn’t help feeling like he had seen this man before, an old handler long gone?

For a moment the other man’s face lit up, but just as quickly it fell back into the creased forehead, “It’s been that bad huh?”

What had been bad? The mission?

“Permission to speak?”

The creases grew deeper, was he making the handler unhappy?

“No, you don’t have to-" The man started but then stopped himself, seemed to think and then continue with that same heart broken look in his eyes, "Um yes, you can speak.”

“Something is wrong with my programming, sir. I do not-”

He had relived memories before, Zola had liked to play around with it actually. This must be Pierce. Back before.

Where was Pierce?

The mission failed.

What mission?

“Bucky, do you remember meeting me? A few months ago? You saved my life.”

He wasn’t supposed to save lives? Was this a test?

He was going to be punished. They liked these games. He was playing it wrong.

“Captain, sir, I’m sorry to interrupt, but he’s becoming agitated, we don’t think that he- well that he understands where he is- thinks this is Hydra.”

Where did the new person come from? The Soldier hadn’t even noticed them.

“I’m sorry but we need to administer additional sedation,”

The Soldier jerked back in the chair he was attached to, what were they-? There were more people, nothing was moving like it was supposed to- That face.

But I knew him.

Pain overwhelmed his senses, punishment, Pierce said.

There were more hands on him. Voices, too many voices.

Someone was screaming, crying too.

Then cool silent nothingness.

#tw: forced sedation #tw: confusion #bucky #the Soldier #pierce #alexander pierce #james buchanan barnes #Steve Rogers #brain washing #confusion #poor boy keeps getting confused #he's gonna need a lot of help #steve is so sad #forcefully committed #involuntarily admitted

[mandoinevarro]

Red Steam Part II

If you want context and even more bullshit read Part 1 here.

Words: 4.5k

Rating: E

Warnings: Mentions of violence, vaginal sex, unprotected sex

a/n: thank god there are so many synonyms for “steam” 

It was only after he bribed the middle-aged Twi’lek clerk—who eyed the credits he set on her desk unimpressed, only to pocket them after an exaggerated sigh—and followed her up a cramped flight of stairs and along the dark, mazelike hallways of the second floor of the healing baths, that the Mandalorian found himself in front of the narrow black door that hid his bounty. Apparently.

The clerk’s molars chewed on a wooden toothpick while she fumbled with the key ring on her hip that rattled metallically with every step. She took her sweet time inspecting key by key and seemed unfazed by the waves of moans and the banging on walls that floated out of closed doors.

“Think he only brought a girl or two with him,” the Twi’lek mumbled as she took out a key from the bunch and held it close to her eyes. After a nod, she inserted it in the keyhole.

Mando scoffed. Only a girl or two. Like the kid hadn’t fucked himself into enough trouble already.

The clerk turned the doorknob, pushed it inwards and headed back to her station. Over her shoulder, she barked at the Mandalorian, “Make it quick.”

Yeah, he intended to.

That was about an hour ago.

The whole place is trashed. Mando gets up from the floor panting and clutching his bruised ribs. Something’s broken for sure. He limps towards his rival, who sits angry and defeated on a bed of splinters that confettied out of cracked staircase balusters when Mando was thrown against them and fell to the ground level. With painful movements, his heavy boot kicks the blaster from his adversary’s reach and picks it up.

It wasn’t his quarry who came after him hard when Mando barged into the little love nest. One moment the poor kid was begging for his orgasm, the next he was ripping his lungs at the sight of the bounty hunter and tugging desperately at the fluffy mock handcuffs that attached him to the bedposts.

The girl who was jacking him off, though. She didn’t even give the hunter a second’s noticed before she lunged towards him, effectively tackling and disarming him. She fought the beskar-clad man fiercely and barefoot in a flimsy pink robe, until he decided that enough was enough and scorched what remained of the balusters to a crisp. And then he pointed the flamethrower at her. The pink figure begrudgingly raised her hands in surrender and slumped on the floor after that.

But her eyes are not exactly waving white flags when Mando throws the strongest pair of shackles he owns on her lap and orders her to cuff herself. She glares up at him and wraps them around her wrists, but not before she spits, “Fuck you. Fuck. You. My father’s gonna kill him.”

Mando tongues a dent that he bit inside his cheek. This was supposed to be the easy job, damnit. He was going to find the quarry, tell him the girl’s family wanted his head, and take him back to the ship with not a scratch on the beskar. Easiest money he’d ever make. He wasn’t counting on said girl being with the bounty, much less her fighting like some trained assassin on spice. Stars, the galaxy’s getting stranger by the day.

Once the girl is done, she shakes her bound wrists in the air to get her captor’s attention. He bends down to yank the cuffs, pulling the feral young woman attached to them on her feet. The effort makes needles pierce his injured muscles.  

Maker, he’d been so sure it’d be some painless in-and-out job that he’d let you come along with him.

His grip on the cuffs falters.

He forgot. He forgot you came to the healing baths with him. Disappeared into the first floor corridors, saying you needed to “relax”. Could you still be here? Somewhere along the rows of steaming pools and massage rooms. Or maybe you hurried outside with the stampede of half-naked women he saw rush away from the healing baths.

No. No, if he had seen you run wet and covered only by the almost see-through cloth like the rest of the clients, he’d remember. He’d definitely remember.

The girl tugs insistently at the handcuffs, testing their strength.

Fuck, he shouldn’t be thinking about you right now. He shouldn’t think about you ever. But. There’s something about imagining you dripping with a tissue-thin textile plastered on your figure that makes him forget the cut in his mouth.

“We fucking love each other.” The prisoner’s squeal snaps him out of his reverie. He drags her to what remains of the stairs. He’ll take the quarry, find you, and leave for good. “We only want each other, we crave for each other.” Yeah, he’ll find you and go back to the Crest. Back to barely speaking to you. Back to silently craving for you. “I’ve never felt anything like the pleasure when he slides into my—”

“Okay, I get it,” the Mandalorian snarls. Maker, he can’t stand Core World snobs. He’ll just take the bounty and find you and go. He’ll just—

“You get it?” The girl stops dead on her tracks at the foot of the stairs. She looks him up and down in indignation. “You get it? You glorified gonk droid. What could scrap metal get about passion?”  The cuffs twist away from his grip as their master climbs a couple of charred steps. Before Mando can take her back in his custody, she turns around to face him, chin up, back straight, and towering over him. Too confidently for someone in shackles. She looks down on the visor with eyes so squinted her pupils look like horizontal lines. “What could you get about desire?”

That…that hits a nerve. Plenty, he wants to growl at her, even though she’s obviously just trying to taunt him. He knows plenty about obsessive lust that leaves room for little else. He’s known for a while that the reason he locks himself inside his quarters pulling pathetically at his stiff cock is not just an outlet for pent of stress. He’s come to accept that it is always your image that his psyche sneaks into his mind when his thumb circles the head. As guilty and disgusting as it makes him feel, he’s aware of the fact that every bead of precum belongs to you. That when he bursts into his glove he wants nothing more but to smear it all over your lovely face.

Still. There’s a little voice poking the back of his head and whispering that the girl is right. That someone who’s spent a lifetime with physical and emotional barriers separating him from all stimuli cannot possibly know genuine want. Even worse, maybe you have that idea of him. Maybe you don’t believe there’s flesh beneath the armor either.

His chest shrinks with a drawn out sigh as if he were the one defeated as he grabs the captive by the arm before she can get any further. He’ll just…just take the quarry…and find you—

Almost as a summoning, the syrupy density of your voice plops into his ears in a shape that feels like his name. The pounding against his chest quickens as he turns and ghosts a hand over his blaster. Waiting. Listening.

A high pitched whine drills a hole through one of the more secluded doors in a corner, urgent and upset.

You’re in danger.

The Mandalorian jerks the girl down from the couple of steps that she climbed, a little tougher than he intended. His neck is warm and the biting pain on his sides becomes an afterthought. One swift movement is all it takes to undo one ring of the usually complicated handcuffs. He spots a pillar and forces the prisoner’s arms to hug around it, securing the missing wristlet once her smalls hands meet at the opposite end.

“Hey!” she calls after the hunter, who is already stalking towards the cornered door. “Hey, you can’t leave me here, what—”

Fuck, he shouldn’t have let you come. He should’ve made you stay on the Crest like always. If something happens to you…

The Mandalorian draws his blaster and pushes the dark door open.

Hot, humid steam trails outside to welcome him, clouding his visor. He wipes it poorly with the back of his glove and steps inside. The heavy door falls shut behind him.

At first, all he sees is red. An angry, flaming crimson that dances around the black chamber and immediately draws strings of perspiration from his pores. Slowly, the smog thins and revels a bulky cube in the middle of the room. As well as another, smaller silhouette to its left, from where the restrained mewls are coming from.

Mando sheathes the blaster and steps closer to the figure, carefully, trying to make out what it is. Once he finds himself right between it and the table, he distinguishes the contour of a head. The mist dilutes and the desperate features of your face come to life under the hunter’s fascinated gaze. Your whole face looks like a crumpled piece of paper in an expression that falls just short of pain. Your eyes are wrenched shut and two fingers are shoved into your mouth. When a wide tongue licks them with lazy strokes, Mando feels the cloth over his crotch shrink.

Eyes wander lower, revealing a layer of sweat over your collarbone and…and…

The Mandalorian thinks the fall must have damaged his brain, because he only puts two and two together once he follows a droplet from your sternum to your heaving breasts. It hangs on to one peaked nipple before letting go and sliding down the line of your arm, down, down, down, getting fatter as it absorbs other smaller beads. It curls around your hand and finishes its journey once it falls from a finger. A finger drawing erratic circles around your clit.

If Mando thought it was hot inside the cave before…well, now he’s certain the seething thrill that rushes from his head to his toes and swells in his lower half is going to kill him. The potent punch of his heart is breaking more ribs than the girl did, and he can’t remember what exactly was hurting in his mouth when he runs his own tongue over cracked lips. His cock is draining all the blood and attention from the rest of his body, swelling bigger and bigger.

Of course he fucking knows he should leave. Walk out of the chamber, wait for you to finish, and take care of his own needs in some lonely corner back inside the Razor Crest. But, suddenly, one leg stretches and your foot sweeps over his cuisse.

Fuck, he can tell you’re close. Your thighs shake and the moans get louder and he really needs to get out. His knees start uncramping reluctantly, buying him some time to be able to at least see you come undone. Until you cry, “S-stars, Mando…!”

Did…did he hear you right?

Was that—?

Did you—?

Your fingers halt abruptly and ease out of both of your openings. Disappointment grabs Mando’s heart before panic crushes it. Shit, did you realize he’s here?

He takes a step back.

Wet eyelashes flutter a few times before your eyes open fully. They’re glossy as they look straight ahead. A finger wipes the vapor off the beskar. Your face moves along his body until your attention focuses on his visor and lingers.

The red light prevents him from knowing whether you’re blushing or not, but his cheeks sure as hell light up with shame underneath the helmet. He feels gravity pull his legs with more strength, holding him down in his place and making him face the consequences of his invasion

Still, his glove wraps around your wrist and gently pulls it away.

“I…I’m sorry,” the embarrassed hunter finally croaks out, dropping his gaze to the floor. “I heard you outside and thought…” He shakes his head and sighs. There’s no excuse for this. “I should’ve left. I’m sorry.”

All throughout his excuse of an apology you stare up at him panting. Your pupils are so wide your irises almost disappear behind them. The leftover surprise of being interrupted pleasuring yourself still hangs on your expression, but something in front of you seems to catch your eye, and your features rearrange to confusion. You scoot to the edge of the bench. Your neck cranes up, placing your face directly below his crotch.

The hot breath from your open mouth warms his clothed balls and makes him flinch.

What? Why are you—? Maker, he wishes he knew what the hell you were doing, because he doesn’t think the seams of his pants can hold the way his shaft is pressing insistently against them. Your nose ghosts over his taint and he jumps back.

A pair of hands rests on the plates over his thighs. The remaining spit on your fingers smears on the beskar. You lick your lips until they glisten, and your head tilts to the side as you study his growing erection. Realization irons the puzzled wrinkles on your forehead and a smile pulls your plump lips softly.

“Could you,” you gasp breathlessly, and the Mandalorian knows the answer is yes before you finish, “could you help me?”

Mando…Mando glitches. He’s almost convinced the girl spiced him and his subconscious is borrowing from his archive of filthy fantasies of you to produce the most obscene hallucination possible. Regardless, reality or illusion, you sit soaked and perfectly bare with your face half-wedged under his crotch. Waiting for an answer.

“I, uh. Um.” He gulps. “Uh, h-help you?”

“Uh-huh,” you purr. One hand resting on his cuisse trails up to palm the tent forming in his pants. Mando hisses. You smile. “Help me pick up where I left off.” Your other hand goes back to its place between your legs.

Staring straight into the lines of his visor, you draw languid circles around your bud.

The helmet feels incredibly heavier on his spine. Your finger pushes into your clit and you gasp.

This isn’t real. The hypnotic red vapor fogs his vision and senses with a dreamlike dimness. You look ethereal behind it, like you’ll turn to steam as soon as he reaches out. He’s going to open his eyes in the cockpit of the Crest hard and alone, like always. He’s going to climb down to the hull and see you and try his best to avoid you. He’s going to wake up from the best dream he’s ever had; from the gorgeous curves of your body open and ready for him.

But. But you’re still here. Delusion or not, you’re still dipping your fingers inside your cunt, inviting him to partake. To prove himself human underneath his layers of barriers. And who can blame him, if he indulges in the one thing he’s wanted for months. Even if he will wake up from this.

Without a second thought, Mando rips both gloves off his hands and throws them into the mist enveloping your bodies. Your sweet smile widens when he wraps his hands around your shoulders and massages the moist flesh. You answer by giving his bulge a faint squeeze. But the Mandalorian has little patience for teasing, and he’s not sure when exactly he’s going to be ripped from this dream.  

“Wait,” the modulated voice orders. “Stand up. Please.” You obey, grabbing him for support to avoid falling on the slippery floor. His palms land on your waist, spreading the sweat there. Stars, you feel wonderful.

“Do you want to, uh…” Somehow, he still can’t bring himself ask, so he pulls you closer, so that his erection presses against your belly.

Biting your lip, you look up at him and nod eagerly. Small fingers press between your bodies to unbutton his pants and explore inside. You hum when you feel how hard he already is for you and scoop his throbbing cock out of its prison. “Please.”

Mando grabs your hips and spins you until you’re between him and the table. He pushes you against its side. The fronts of your thighs hit the black surface and you hiss at the contact, but he barely hears you.

He feels buckets of perspiration pouring down his back and chest, hot and heavy wool sticks to his skin, and there’s barely any breathable air slipping below the helmet anymore. But there’s only you. There’s only you and your shifting shoulder blades and  the elegant curve of your spine and your ass, all tinged the color of blood and soaked with the liquified version of the mysterious substance floating around in the air. The pains that overwhelmed his body are long forgotten.  

The fingers of his right hand spread apart from each other and snake up your back so they can feel your silky skin under his.

You shudder.

Fuck, is this was the girl outside was talking about? Right now, tense and painfully hard and high on the sensation of your soft, sweaty skin against his calloused hands, he feels just as foolish as his quarry. Just as likely to beg for anything you’re willing to offer.

Rough fingers push wet strings of hair to the side and grab your neck. He likes how thin it is around his large palm. How the tips of his fingers almost meet when they circle you. He pushes it down.

When your tits brush the surface you flinch and pull back.

“It—it’s c-cold,” you stutter as you try to look over your shoulder at him, but the grip on your neck is steel-strong and he can’t bring himself to soften it. “It’s freezing, Mando.”

Normally, he’d let go. Normally, he’d drop his hand immediately and apologize meekly. Normally, he would’ve walked away the second he caught you pleasuring yourself and would’ve pathetically gotten himself off to your image back in the Crest, like he’s done so many times, and would’ve never brought it up again.

But here, he has you right where he’s wanted you for months. Right now, he needs to prove to himself and to you that there’s hot red blood running through his veins. That below beskar and wool, he desires just like everyone else. Even more.

Especially when it comes to you.

So he doesn’t let go.

With a stronger grip, he forces you down until your chest is flush against the icy table and keeps you still.

“Fuck,” you nearly sob.

The Mandalorian steps closer to you and flattens the backs of your legs and ass with his cuisses. You whimper at the contact like you did with the table, but the cries turn to moans when he starts rubbing his hard cock against the curve of your ass.

Every nerve in his body tenses like a stretched rubber band at the sensation. Your ass is so fucking drenched he doesn’t even need to spit on it to allow his rock-solid cock to glide against you. Your hips push back and you try to meet his movements, but his thighs just crush you closer to the side of the table.  

He won’t look down. He won’t—he can’t, or he’ll lose it right there. He’s certain he’ll cum right then and there if he so much as peeks at what his doing to you. Or worse, he’ll wake up.

He looks down.

It takes every scrap of his self-control not to spill his cum all over your back at the visual. Your glistening body is folded over the table. Your arms hang next to your legs. Your nails scratch the dark rock desperately. The turbid red steam makes you blurry, like an apparition. As surreal as the mental images he conjures of you sometimes, when the ship is empty and he chases his relief inside the hard clutch of his fist. Only now, the long, husky moans you’re letting him hear are as clear as daylight, the scent of sex and sweat radiating off both of you sticks to his nostrils, and the way your body writhes against his are making him harder and more frantic by the second.

This isn’t a dream. It’s you and he has you all to himself.

He can’t wait any longer.

Mando releases your neck and brings both hands down to your ass. He massages and kneads the plump meat there. His teeth grit together to stop a needy groan from pushing past them. Tough fingers spread your cheeks and hold them open. You turn your face to the side.

“Please,” you suddenly spit out, your back curling and flattening almost involuntarily, “oh, fucking stars, Mando, just—just put it inside, just pl—”

The heat of his cock teasing your folds cuts you off. The Mandalorian inhales what little oxygen he can get and sheathes himself inside you in one strong movement. You cry out and he groans like nobody can hear either of you.

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, why are you so tight? You’re—you’re—

“So wet,” he hears himself slur. The red haze of the room spins around him. He sounds drunk.  “Why—who could be this fu-fucking tight and b-beautiful—I—” Mando manages to swallow the last few words. Now is not time for them. Instead, he pulls back. His cock eases outside almost completely, leaving only the head inside. Then he buries himself again, slowly, grinding into you and letting you feel how every vein of his shaft pulses against your slick walls. He works up a paused pace as he spreads your cheeks further apart and dips his helmet to see how he’s stretching you.

Your arms lift to your sides to clutch the opposite end of the surface. You’re making the deepest, most arousing sounds he’s ever heard. You take him with a throaty mmm or a trembling ahhh that make his chest collapse with embarrassing gasps that he’s trying so hard to suppress. But your boiling pussy clenches tighter and he can’t help choking on the heated vapor that dances under the helmet and drips on his facial hair.  

“It’s you—ngh,” you finally answer. “I think of you al—always.” His hips falter at the sound of your voice. “I g-get so wet just im—magining what you—˝ Almost as a reflex, he pushes roughly into you and you cut yourself off with a high whimper.

You can’t finish your sentence. You don’t have to. What you said is enough to scramble Mando’s brains like eggs and flick a switch inside him he didn’t know was there.

Maker, he shouldn’t go faster. He shouldn’t overwhelm you. What if he hurts you? But your confession seems to thicken the mist that’s clouding his visor and restraint. Stars, you think about him just like he thinks of you. Maybe there were nights you would both touch yourselves simultaneously to the thought of each other in your separate quarters. What would you imagine? How long has it been going on?

He doesn’t remember releasing your ass nor burying his fingers into your dripping hair. He didn’t even realize how faster and more brutal his thrusts got all of a sudden until he hears how you trade your long, vibrating moans for short mewls that sound like his cock is puncturing them out of you.

And he should stop and he should ask you what you want and he should apologize for being rough and he should be doing so many things that he just can’t fucking bring himself to do when he feels you squeezing around him like you want him to be that much of a fucking savage with you. So he picks up the pace.

Through the haze, though, he manages to glue a couple of broken words together. “Th-this o-okay? Y-you—fuck—it—it fee-l good?” He sounds like he doesn’t even know fucking Basic, but you’re apparently fluent in whatever primitive language he just spoke, because you nod fervently, your cheek still pressed to the cold rock.

Your mouth gapes like it’s trying to suck the words you need from the fog around you and drool spills from your pretty lips. You only manage to breathe out, “Harder.”

Harder he goes, tangling the fist on your hair more tensely until it pulls your neck up. His other hand shoves your thighs and digs around your folds until he finds a hard nub that he rubs up and down quickly. The feeling makes you clamp down so compactly around his swollen shaft that he has to put his back into his thrusts to be able to push in. Still, he manages to slide inside with the help of your arousal and his precum and the sweat of your bodies and whatever the fuck is vaporized in the room. Every thrust shoves your whole body forwards and makes the edge of the table dig more violently into your hips. But you’re not complaining. Your irises are rolled as back as they’ll go into your skull and your companion is not sure you can even hear yourself moaning for him anymore.

Mando is going to black out. He’s sure he’s going to pass the fuck out. He can’t breathe and you’re repeating his name like a prayer and he can tell you’re close and his cock is just begging for release. A cooler breeze brushes the edge of the helmet. He keeps opening you like it’s the last thing he’ll do.

His ears ring with light metallic clinks and you’re muttering incomprehensible gibberish and he clenches his jaw when he makes out the words “I” and “cum” and he can’t believe his fucking luck and his balls pull up to announce that he’s also almost there and—

“I thought I said,” a sudden, chastising voice cuts the dense steam like it’s butter, “to make it quick.”

You both jump at the interruption. Mando’s heart and movements halt as adrenaline shoots into his blood and he looks around the brume for the intruder.

The Twi’lek clerk stands near the door, squinting to make out what exactly is going on in the steaming room. You both stare at her stupidly—Mando still buried deep inside you—as she swats the fog like a swarm of flies she can scare away with her palm.

Finally, the cloud dissipates enough for her eyes to focus on the erotic sight before her.

She doesn’t even look surprised. She simply chews on her soggy toothpick annoyed and rolls her eyes, like this is just another day at work for her.

“We literally rent rooms for that,” she grouses exasperated while pointing a long finger to the roof  like she’s talking to two idiots, “upstairs.”  

#the mandolarian #the mandalorian x you #the mandolorian x reader #the mandalorian smut #Pedro Pascal #mando #mando x reader #mando x you #din djarin #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin smut #star wars smut #Smut

[theodorecanaryhood]

Family

Jason Todd x female reader

Reader takes Jason home to meet the family, but Jason sees why reader was reluctant to let her family meet him.

You'd been with Jason for 8 months now and you were already a big part of his life, even his family's lives. They loved you deeply, almost as much as Jason.

However, he hasn't met your family yet and he is very confused as to why. You don't really seem to talk much about them.

'Doll, I'm sure they will be great' Jason rolls down the phone to you. 'They will love me I'm sure' he continues.

'Jason I'm ot saying that they won't like you, I'm just saying that you might not like them' you inform.

'Whay does that mean?' He asks intrigued, you sigh a little.

'My family is, complicated. But I guess you'll see when you meet them' you finish, walking down the street towards the little coffee shop in the corner to meet your mum and sister.

'OK, I'm sure it'll be fine, babe don't worry. I'll see you soon. I love you' Jason soothes down the phone. You smile brightly.

'I love you too' you say as you both end the call, walking over to the table outside your mum spots you.

'Y/n, so good to see you again' she says as she stands up and hugs you tight. You return the hug, but not as enthusiastic. Then your sister stands up.

'Hey' she smiles as she leans over to hug you, you return the hug. Even more non enthusiastic, your relationship was always awkward with your sister. She's 10 years older and has always been jealous of you. You're prettier, more that you make more of an effort with your appearance, you're smarter, work harder and earn more money. Plus, she's still single, and never really had a boyfriend.

'So, how are you guys?' You asked as you stand next to the table where they're seated.

'Good, we've been great. You?' Your mum asks trying to make a conversation, you shrug a little.

'Fine I guess. You guys want a coffee? My treat' you wink,

'I'll have a americano' your sister replies,

'Latte' your mum follows, you nod a little and pull out your purse.

'Sweet, I'll be right back' you say, going inside to get the orders.

'She seems different, does she seem different to you?' Your sister asks your mother, your Mother, Janet, just shrugs a little.

'Happier, maybe a little distant' your mother finishes, your sister starts to have a little blush and starts smiling as she tries to hide her face.

'Don't look, but there's a really hot guy staring at me over at that table' your sister whispers to your Mum.

'Really?' She replies, your sister just nods as she makes eye contact with the stranger. He's tall, black hair with a white streak, leather jacket, muscular build and a strong jaw.

'Here you go guys, sorry it took a while. Got a newby behind the counter' you say as you bring out the coffees, four as you got Jason's too seeing as he'll be here soon. Sitting opposite them with your back to the direction your sister is looking in.

'No worries' your mum smiles as she picks up her cup.

'What are you looking at?' You ask your sister, who's staring behind you.

'Oh my, he's coming over' your sister blushes harder.

'Who is?' You ask, just then a shadow comes behind you as someone approaches your table.

'Hey' you turn to look, it's Jason standing behind you.

'Hi' your sister flutters, you stand up and give Jason a kiss. Your sister's jaw dropping to the floor.

'Mum, y/s/n, this is my boyfriend Jason. Jason this is my Mum, Janet and my big sister y/s/n' you introduce everyone.

'Great to finally meet you' Jason smiles at them, your sister just giving you daggers from across the table. You weren't sure why though.

...

Coffee date with mum and sister was a success, although your sister did seem a little off. Your Mum kept looking at her funny, like she was signalling for her to shut up. You'd recognise it straight away, it's the same look you used to get when you were a kid.

'So this is your house huh? Like where you grew up?' Jason asks, breaking your thoughts.

'Yeah' you reply short, Jason looks at you with concern.

'You OK?' He asks, taking your hand, you just smile at him and squeeze his hand in reassurance.

'Baby girl' you hear your Dad shout from down the hall, he runs over and hugs you. However, unlike before, you hug him back just as tight.

'Who's this underwear model?' Your dad asks chuckling, you laugh a little.

'Daddy, this Jason. Jason this is my Dad' you smile, Jason takes his hand.

'Nice to meet you sir' Jason says, your Dad waves his hand a little.

'Call me Eric please' your Dad insists. Your Dad was the only relative you genuinely loved, he was the easiest person to get on with. And had the biggest heart.

...

Dinner with the family was it's usual, your Mother loved the sound of her own voice. Your sister kept checking her phone every 2 minutes. You and Jason just sat hoping this would end soon. Atleast your Dad was here.

'When did you guys get divorced?' Jason asks your parents,

'Few years ago, but I like to see my baby girl so I come and visit every now and then' your Dad replies.

You looked over at your sister who was on her phone on the other end of the table.

'Hey y/s/n, can you put your phone away please?' You ask nicely,

'Excuse me?' She snaps,

'We're having family dinner and you're being kind of rude, no phones at the table remember?' You continue, your sister gives you the evilest, most terrifying look you've ever seen someone give.

'Don't ever tell me what to do, you don't own me. Don't ever speak to me like that again' she growls, your Dad and Mum get up from the table.

'Leave the room please' your Dad calmly speaks to your sister,

'No, she gets everything. She gets the money, the attention. The hot boyfriend. I'm 10 years older and never had a boyfriend, she gets everything. I get treated like shit' your sister stands from her seat and shouts.

'Maybe if you stop acting like a bitch all the time, cleaned up a little. Weren't such an asshole then maybe a guy would stick around' you jump back in, Jason looks shocked, so do your parents. Your sister storms out of the room angry.

...

Back in your apartment, Jason walks in behind you. Not wanting to go back home yet to make sure you're ok.

'Are we gonna talk about this?' Jason asks you as you walk into the kitchen.

'There's nothing to talk about' you reply, not looking at him. You start to pour yourself a glass of whiskey to calm your shaking.

'Babe, you just had an argument with your sister. Then your Mum, you left before we could say anything else to them' Jason kind of raises his voice, he's not angry. Mostly shocked.

'That's my family, we argue. We fight. To be completely honest with you Jason, I hate my sister and my Mother' you turn to face him, 'my sister, my sister has always been jealous of anything I've had. Every boyfriend I've had, she's found some way to get rid of him. That's why I wouldn't let her meet you, cause I don't want you to leave too' you start to cry.

'I'm not gonna leave you' Jason purred to you, wrapping you in a hug, 'I love you too much to do that' he finishes.

'My Dad is the only part of my family I need, the rest of them, I'm not sure I ever want to see again' you speak into Jason's chest, hugging him back.

'Then you don't have to, if you don't want them in your life then that is your decision' Jason kisses the top of your head.

You stand with Jason, hugging each other until you feel yourself calming down. Knowing he's on your side is all you need. The people you care about in your life is all you need.

This isn't as long as I aimed to make it, it's loosely based around a recent falling out in my family which has caused me to stop speaking to my sister and Mother. But I still have my two brothers and my Dad. I also want to do a Nightwing fic so if any ideas please let me know.

Hope you liked the fic ☺ 😊

#red hood #gotham #jason todd #batman arkham series #batfamily #red hood fanfiction #dick grayson #nightwing #red hood x reader #red hood x you #jason todd x you #jason todd x y/n #jason todd x reader #jason todd fanfiction

[obxfics]

The Lines We Cross

summary: you are topper’s brother and just happen to be secretly dating JJ when the truth gets out, and things get ugly

pairing: JJ Maybank x male!reader

word count: 5,076 (this one really... it really got away from me lmao)

requested by: @ueomega​

a/n: so this is a really, really long fic and i hope it’s good! i honestly dont know how it got this long lmao but it was requested weeks ago so hopefully this makes up for the wait!

Being a Kook definitely had its perks. Got to go the best schools, nice vacations, could basically buy anything you could ever want with Daddy’s money, and, most importantly, you had options others didn’t when it came to your future. On the flip side, there were also certain expectations that came with all the perks. For instance, you were expected to be well behaved, to do nothing that could reflect badly on the family, and you needed to be smart, or at least smart enough and accomplished enough to get into the best schools Daddy could pay for. And for you, specifically, to be absolutely perfect.You were known on Kildare Island for the longest time as Topper’s twin brother, his built in competition. As the two eldest sons, much was expected of you, but only one could come out on top as the golden child. And for the longest time, everyone thought it was you. Your father was certainly looking to groom you as the future heir to his company. And then you entered eighth grade. Topper found some pictures hidden under your bed and discovered your biggest secret: you liked boys. It wasn’t long after that until your parents found out, and suddenly you weren’t treated like the successful son you were. Your mother took over the job of looking after you, and your father in turn focused on grooming your brother for the role you were supposed to have. According to your mother, this sort of thing getting out could be detrimental for the company if you were allowed to take over. Having a gay son wasn’t bad, but having that gay son become the CEO? Unheard of.

So, you were to be perfect. Who would be upset at the sweet gay kid who shut his mouth? The one who didn’t stir shit up? So you kept as low a profile as you could. You hung around Topper and Rafe, accompanied girls to their debutante balls, and any relationships you had were either with other perfect Kooks or low profile hookups. Everyone learned to turn a blind eye at any parties at the Boneyard if they saw you standing maybe a bit too close to some handsome tourist. Relationships were hard to come by, and you never hooked up with someone from the Cut.

That is, until you did. It was at some party at the Boneyard, a kegger some of the Pogues were throwing, and you arrived with Sarah Cameron instead of your brother. While she had broken up with Topper, you still liked to spend some time with her. Gave you a break from having to act so perfect all the time. She led you towards the booze, her arms wrapped around your waist with your arm slung over her shoulder. None of the other Kooks you ran with where around yet, so you felt more relaxed than you had in months. She had helped you get ready, convincing you to keep your shirt unbuttoned to entice any cute guys at the party, and you had to admit, you were having a pretty good time. That is, until your eyes met those of JJ Maybank over by the keg.

It wasn’t that you hated the blonde, but you didn’t necessarily like him. You heard Topper complain about the boy enough times to know that you should steer clear of him. He was bad news. After all, wasn’t he always getting into fights with your friends? But he was best friend’s with John B, and Sarah was with John B, so you couldn’t really avoid him for much longer. So you allowed her to tug you over to the two boys who were serving the drinks. At least you’d be getting alcohol. JJ mentioned something about you being Topper’s better half, causing you to roll your eyes and down the drink he gave you. You were supposed to be the golden child, the one that caused people to remember Topper as your brother, but your parents had stolen that from you.

You didn’t really remember much more about that night, but you did remember the end. You and JJ had ended up getting into a heated argument towards the edge of the party, and others began leaving. Eventually there was no one around you when the whole thing came to a head; JJ grabbed your face in his hands and kissed you. To say you were shocked was an understatement. Before that, you had heard JJ would sometimes pick up male tourists, but you never even suspected he would ever go for a Kook like you, but there he was, kissing you like he was an addict and you were his next hit. What you two did later that night in the Volkswagen he’d borrowed from John B was supposed to be a one time thing. Until a week later when he appeared at your window and dragged you to a secluded part of the beach to have a repeat. And then a few days later when you showed up at the Yacht Club where he worked and tugged him into a storage closet. Then suddenly you were just talking and going on picnics until the both of you realized you weren’t just hooking up. You were dating. It was immediately agreed that it should be kept a secret; if it got out that you were dating a Pogue, your reputation, and that of your family’s, would take a hit, and JJ was known to hate Kooks. He couldn’t be seen having feelings for you. This worked for the two of for just over a month before you started getting sloppy.

One day you were spending the afternoon with Sarah, laughing as you lounged on her family’s boat. She had somehow convinced her dad to let her take it out with you, and it seemed like you had the entire intercostal to yourselves. You let out a contented sigh and stretched out your limbs like a cat in the sun. You glanced over when Sarah suddenly gasped.

“What is it?” you asked, propping yourself up on your elbows to properly look at her.

“Oh my god, when did you get those?” She reached out to touch your chest. You looked down to see love bites littering your torso. “When did you find someone to hook up with?”

“I, uh, it’s no big deal,” you tried to brush off her questions. “Just some dude I’ve been hooking up with from the next town over.”

“Wait, the same guy? For how long?”

“Sarah, it really isn’t that big of a deal. I’ve gone through most of the dudes here, and I’m bored of seducing tourists, so having a booty call half an hour away is the easiest thing.”

“Sounds pretty tedious, if you ask me.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t exactly have a deep pool of potential lays, do I, Sarah?”She sighed and nodded, giving your shoulder a squeeze. “You’re right. I’m sorry for pressing. I just wish your family didn’t put this pressure on you to be so perfect. You should be happy.”

“They let me be out,” you tried to defend your parents.

“On certain conditions, y/n. You can no longer have the job you deserve, you can’t date anyone who isn’t a Kook, and they won’t even let you really be proud of who you are. You need to stay reserved, a respectable gay man, not gay teenager having fun.”

You shrugged. “It is what it is, Sarah. We can’t all rebel against our families.”

Oh but you wished you could. As you helped Sarah get ready for her date with John B, you wished you could be the type to rebel against your family. You longed to hold hands with JJ in public and kiss him whenever you wanted to, but you knew it wasn’t just about you. What about JJ? You never knew where he stood with possibly going public one day.

“What are you gonna do while I’m gone?” Sarah asked as you handed her a purse.

“I do have a life outside of you,” you laughed. “Maybe I’ll hit up my boy for a booty call.”

“Be safe!” she called over her shoulder with a smile.

“You as well, Miss Cameron! Tell your boy to keep his hands to himself or I’ll kick his ass!”

She threw her head back and cackled. “Because John B will believe that. Besides, we both know I’m the one with the wandering hands.”

You shook your head and checked your phone for any texts from JJ. Bingo. With John B and Sarah going for their date, JJ had the Chateau to himself, and he was inviting you over for some fun. You couldn’t keep the grin from your face as you climbed into your car and made your way to the Cut. You made sure to park a few streets over so none of the Pogues would see your car parked out front of John B’s and walked the rest of the way. By the time you stepped foot on the porch of the Chateau, you were covered in a light sheen of sweat. You spotted your boyfriend messing around in the kitchen and walked up behind him, sliding your arms around his waist.

“Glad you finally decided to show up,” he laughed, turning his head to look at you.

“Mm, I had to finish up with my tourist booty call,” you teased, rubbing your nose against his. “I’ve missed you.”

He turned in your hold and slid his fingers into your hair, smirking when your eyes fluttered shut. You felt his lips on yours, slow and sweet at first. It was nice, but you hadn’t seen him in nearly a week. You didn’t want slow and sweet. He groaned when you tugged him closer to you and deepened the kiss, your tongue slipping into his open mouth. His hands slid under your shirt to caress your chest. You separated just long enough to rip your shirt from your body and throw it over your shoulder, watching with hungry eyes as JJ did the same with his. Then you were attacking his neck, sucking and nipping at his throat before soothing the bites with your tongue. A smirk twitched at your lips when you heard the pants escaping from JJ, his head thrown back as he allowed you to mark up his beautiful skin. The both of you were so caught up in each other, his hands moving towards your belt, that neither of you heard the screen door creak open.

“What the fuck?” That you did hear.

You two sprang apart, lips swollen and chests heaving with the effort it took to catch your breath, and your eyes fell upon Sarah and John B. It was John B who had spoken. He seemed the most surprised out of the two of them. Sarah just looked at you with sad eyes. She understood what you were going through; she, after all, had attempted to keep her relationship with John B a secret too at the beginning. She knew the trouble that would follow if anyone found out.

“That… we, uh, we can explain,” JJ rasped, clearly trying to think of some lie, although he knew it was useless. How the hell was he going to explain why he and some Kook were practically grinding against each other in his best friend’s kitchen? He sighed and reached out to take your hand. “We’re together.”

Panic filled you when you saw the look on John B’s face. He wasn’t happy. He wasn’t going to tell anyone was he? Sarah must have noticed the look on your face.

“You two should talk,” she suggested to the two Pogues. “y/n, why don’t you come with me?”

You quickly pressed a kiss to JJ’s temple before taking Sarah’s hand and following her out of the Chateau. She squeezed your hand as you walked towards where you parked your car.

“So… how long have you and JJ been together?” she asked.

“Um, a little more than a month. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. We just… my parents… you know.”

“Hey, don’t apologize,” she reassured you. “You know I understand better than anyone hiding a relationship with a Pogue.”

“What if everyone finds out?” you whispered.

“How would you feel if they did?”

“I… I hate all this hiding. And… I don’t care what my parents think. I would stay with JJ. I love him.”

“Everything will work out, I promise. Let’s get you home.”

Meanwhile, at the Chateau, a much different discussion was playing out. JJ, sick of keeping everything a secret, had agreed to invite Pope and Kie over to tell them everything, and he sat looking at his best friends after it was all laid out.

“So you… and Topper’s brother?” Kie broke the silence. “And it’s like an actual relationship?”

“Yeah.”

“JJ, you know we support you and love you no matter what,” John B said, “but… you can’t be with him?”

“What? Why?”

“Why?! Are you out of your mind? He’s Topper’s brother! The only one worse than Topper is Rafe!”

“He’s nothing like his brother!”

“JJ, being with him is dangerous,” Pope agreed. “Rafe and Topper almost killed John B for seeing Sarah. Everyone knows y/n was the favorite son. Hell, he probably still is, even with all the drama about him being passed over or some shit.”

“Exactly. He was the golden child. The whole Figure Eight will be out for you.”

“This is ridiculous,” JJ sighed. “What are your thoughts on this, Kie?”

“I… I knew y/n, at school when Sarah and I were first friends. He liked to hang around with us, even crash our sleepovers, but we never minded. I saw what he went through. He still carried around the hurt about being cast aside, about being second to his brother, about having to pretend to be someone he’s not. He’s a good guy, and JJ’s right. He’s nothing like Topper.” JJ was about to thank her when she said, “But I also know that Pope and John B are right. His family will never stand for this relationship, and from what I know about him, he won’t risk disappointing them. If it comes down to it, he’ll throw you aside to stay in their good graces.”

“That’s not true!” JJ couldn’t help but feel betrayed by both his friends and his feelings. Doubt crept into his heart and clouded his mind. Would you really not hesitate to leave him behind? His mom didn’t. “That’s not true… he wouldn’t… he wouldn’t do that.”

A sob escaped him when Kie wrapped an around his shoulder. John B placed his hands on his best friend’s thighs while Pope rubbed JJ’s back.

“The best thing, I think, is for you to just end it now before anyone else finds out,” John B suggested. “That way you can protect him from his family finding out, and you can protect yourself from him leaving you.”

You spent the whole night worrying. Every single time your brother got a text from one of your friends, you were terrified it was about you and JJ. You weren’t even sure how they would find out because it wasn’t like John B was going to send Topper a text like, “Hey did u hear ur brother is hooking up w my best friend?” But you couldn’t shake the feeling that something bad was going to happen. Finally you got a text from JJ asking you to meet him in your backyard. You made sure everyone was asleep before sneaking outside.

“Hey,” you greeted him with a shy smile, “how did your talk with John B go?”

“It was… good. I told Pope and Kie about us.”

“And?”

“y/n,” he sighed, making your stomach clench unpleasantly. “We need to talk.”

“Did they… did they say anything?” You saw his jaw clench and how his eyes couldn’t meet yours. “What did they say? If they disapprove because I’m a guy—“

“Of course they wouldn’t disapprove because of that! My friends love and accept me the way I am!”

“So they do disapprove of me.”

“They… they had some important things to say.”

“Like what?” you whispered, afraid of what he would say next. “What did they say to you, JJ?”

“Nothing I hadn’t already thought myself. And they were right. What would have happened if it had been your brother who had seen us? He would have told your parents, or given you some ultimatum, right?”

“What does that have to do with—“

“And you would have gone along with what he said.”

“How can you say that?” You tried to hold back tears as you felt your heart break. “You know I love you. How can you say that I would just submit to my family?”

“Because that’s why we kept this thing between us a secret! Because you’re ashamed to be with someone like me! It would ruin your stellar reputation!”

You stood there, arms crossed tightly over your chest, and stared at JJ. You schooled your face into your Kook persona, looking at him with cold eyes.

“So that’s it, then?” you asked cooly. “We’re just… over because you want to listen to your friends over your own boyfriend?”

“Are you really going to say you would do something different?”

“Well what would be the point? You’ve already made up your mind. Nothing I say will change what you’ve decided to believe, so why waste my breath?”

Tears seemed to fill JJ’s eyes. “You’re not going to even fight for us?”

“Did you?”

“y/n?” you heard your brother’s tired voice call from the balcony that overlooked the yard. “What’s going on here?”

“Nothing. Maybank was just leaving.”

You turned your back on JJ and hurried inside, waiting until the door shut before you broke down in tears. You could hear Topper stumble down the stairs and freeze when he saw you crying at the bottom.

“I—are you okay?”

“Just peachy.”

He sighed and sat down next to you on the bottom step. The two of you, despite being twins, were never particularly good at the whole supportive sibling thing. You cared for each other, but after your parents pit the two of you against each other since birth, it was hard to be particularly close. In this moment, however, Topper hesitated only a moment before wrapping an arm around your shoulder and bringing you close, allowing you to sob into his shoulder.

“I don’t know what’s happening between you and Maybank… but… I’m sorry. It didn’t look like you guys were making up.”

You let out a bitter laugh. “Gonna tell Mom and Dad I was sneaking around with some guy from the Cut?”

“No. What good would that do? They would just get pissed and push you farther away. What’s the point in having them hate their favorite son more?”

“I’m not the favorite. Not anymore.”

“Well… neither am I.”

The two of you sat together for what seemed like hours, not really needing to speak to offer comfort to each other. Your parents ruined your sibling bond before it could really start, and you knew your brother could be an absolute asshole, but there was a sort of understanding between you now. You both had been broken by the constant pressure and judgement of your parents, and neither of you would ever good enough. Not anymore.

When you woke up the next morning, you felt like shit. You were supposed to meet Sarah for brunch at her place, but you didn’t want to tell her that JJ had broken up with you. She’d ask why, and you didn’t want to have to say it was because her boyfriend and friends got it into JJ’s head that you were going to abandon him. So you stayed in bed, curled up under your duvet with your phone turned off. You didn’t want to deal with anyone. You should have known your best friend would not stay away when she realized you weren’t reading her texts. You groaned when your bedroom door opened, Topper giving you an apologetic look before Sarah barreled in.

“Sorry, bro, she wouldn’t take no for an answer. I’ll just… leave you two alone.”

You glared at Sarah from underneath the mound of pillows you had created to snuggle with. Why was she ruining your pity party?

“What the hell is going on? Why haven’t you been reading my texts? We were supposed to have brunch!”

“Ugh, tone it down, Cameron. I’m clearly not in the best of moods.”

“Is this because John B found out yesterday about you and—“

“Do not fucking say his name,” you growled, your heart twisting at the thought of JJ. “I don’t want to talk about that Pogue ever again.”

“Whoa, okay, what is going on? Seriously, talk to me.”

You sniffled as you felt another round of tears coming. “Last night, he came here. And… and he broke up with me.”

“What? Why?”

Sarah slid under the covers beside you and wrapped her arms around your trembling figure, drawing you close so you could rest your head on her chest.

“Talk to me, honey. What happened?” she whispered in your hair.

“I don’t know. He was talking about some shit like if Topper found out, I would leave him to make my family happy. He didn’t even ask me. He just… said it like it was fact.”

“Did he mention anything from his talk with John B?”

“Just that they told him some important things.”

“Oh, I’ll kill that boy,” she snarled.

“No, Sarah, please don’t make a big deal of it! Please, I just… I just want to forget all about this.”

“Can you really move on so quickly?”

“…It fucking hurts,” you whimpered. “I thought what we had… it was special. I wanted to keep it secret so the people here wouldn’t fucking ruin it. But I guess we already did that ourselves.”

Sarah didn’t say anything else, just let you cry it all out in her arms. She would occasionally kiss your hair and stroked your back, trying her best to get you to feel better at all, but she knew this would take time. You were heartbroken. There was no quick fix to this. Except maybe…

A few days later, you looked at yourself in the mirror and sighed. In a weird twist that no one saw coming, Sarah and Topper had taken it upon themselves to throw a huge party for the Figure Eight at the Yacht Club. You weren’t exactly sure of the theme, but Topper instructed you to wear the clothes he had set out for you, and so you stared at your reflection all dress up in slacks, button down shirt, suspenders, and the scuffed up Vans you decided on over the dress shoes Topper wanted you to wear. You hadn’t been in the mood for a party until Sarah told you with a wink that this would be the perfect time to get laid and forget your heartbreak. Probably not the healthiest way to cope with a breakup, but it sure beat getting blackout drunk and waking up with the world’s worst hangover.

“Yo, you ready?”

You looked over your shoulder at your brother and shrugged. You weren’t even sure why they had decided to plan this party, and you weren’t in the proper headspace to start the process of understanding how the fuck they had agreed to work together.

“Still can’t believe you and Sarah are throwing me a pity party.”

“It’s not a pity party. It’s a ‘y/n needs to get laid and stop moping’ party,” Topper grinned. “Come on, let’s get you to the club, shall we?”

With a heavy sigh, you followed your brother out of the house to his car. You weren’t sure what the official story for the party was, but you assumed it was not ‘hey let’s get y/n laid’ because you were sure your parents wouldn’t think that was good for the family’s reputation. How the hell were you supposed to pick up some dude if your parents were right there? Obviously Topper and Sarah had overlooked some things, but it just seemed like getting drunk was the move.

“You are seriously not about to make a beeline to the bar,” Sarah intercepted you. “You literally just got here.”

“Damn it, Sarah, I’m dealing with heartbreak here. Show some sympathy.”

“I’m not letting you get wasted in front of your parents.”

You watched as she snagged a bottle of champagne from the bar and motioned to the club with her head. She led you into the locker room and opened the bottle with a loud ‘pop!’ causing the two of you to giggle.

“Sorry about the party.”

“Sarah, it’s barely started,” you laughed. “Nothing really to apologize for yet.”

“Yeah but it was my idea. I thought it would help you.”

“Just having you by my side helps.”

“I yelled at John B.”

“Well why would you go and do something like that?”

“He deserved it. He came clean about what all the Pogues said to JJ. They all felt terrible because JJ looked awful. Like probably as bad as you.”

“I look stunning,” you grumbled before taking a long swig of the champagne. “But what did they think was gonna happen?”

“They’re all idiots. Even Kie. But I set them straight about you.”

“Ah, so they think I’m just some helpless Kook who only does what Mommy and Daddy tell me to do.”

“Once upon a time you might have been.”

“Then they decided that because of my sexuality I didn’t deserve to be an important part of the family. I was immediately relegated to the disappointment. And for what? For them to continue to control my life like I matter to them?” You took another sip of the alcohol. “I would have done anything for JJ. Even defy my family. They’ve already decided I’m no good, so what did it matter if I dated him? What difference would that even make.”

Sarah rubbed your back and took back the bottle of champagne. She stood up and offered you a hand.

“Let’s go dance and get shit-faced.”

You grinned and took her hand. “Hell yeah, Sarah Cameron.”

As you walked back out to join the party, you eyes fell on a familiar head of golden hair. What the hell was he doing here? You could see your parents notice him, and then security was headed his way. Shit. Against your better judgement, you hurried outside.

“What’s going on?” you asked, causing your parents and JJ to look at you.

“A party crasher,” your mother told you, looking at your ex-boyfriend with a look of contempt. “No doubt trying to steal some of our expensive alcohol.”

You caught sight of the Pogues hovering at the edge of the party. Seriously, what the fuck was going on?

“y/n, I came here to talk to you,” JJ said as he desperately struggled against security’s tight grip on him.

“And so you decided to crash a party? Honestly, what was your thought process here?”

“I… I,” his voice cracked as his eyes flashed to your parents. He looked at you as if asking for permission. A chill ran down your spine when you realized he was asking for permission to talk about your relationship in front of your parents. Intrigued, you nodded.

“What is going on here?” your father asked, cutting JJ off before he could even utter another sound. “Do you know this…” His lip curled as he looked over the boy you loved. “Do you know him, y/n?”

“Please, y/n, I’m sorry,” JJ whispered. “I shouldn’t have just jumped to conclusions. I should have just talked to you.”

“Yeah, you should have.”

“My friends are a bunch of idiots who don’t even know you… but… they want to. Get to know you. Without bias.”

“What are you—“

“I was a mess after the other night. I couldn’t eat and I couldn’t sleep and… I looked like shit.” His eyes met yours, and you were taken aback by the emotion in them. “I realized my life fucking sucks without you.”

You took a step towards him and asked, “Why?”

“Because I love you.”

The breath caught in your throat as your parents yelled at security to drag JJ away. He’d never said that to you before, and looking into his eyes… you knew he was telling the truth.

“Wait, let him go!” you demanded.

“y/n, what are you doing?” your father barked, his hand wrapping around your arm to keep you in place. “You cannot possibly be thinking about reciprocating this… this lowlife’s confession! Remember what we talked about.”

Suddenly Topper was coming between you two, causing your father to drop you. You could see the absolute surprise cross your father’s face. Never before had either of his sons stood up to him. Your brother gave you a nod. His permission, even if you didn’t need it. You hurried to catch up to security, who were close to throwing JJ off the premises.

“Wait! This is my party, and I say he can stay,” you told them, standing firmly in their way. “Let him go.”

The two guards looked at each other and rolled their eyes. Probably didn’t want to get caught up in some teenage drama, so they dropped JJ and backed away. You helped him up and placed your hands on his shoulders.

“Did you mean it?”

He looked deep in your eyes and nodded. Tears filled your eyes, and he was quick to brush any that fell away.

“I’m sorry that I’m such an asshole,” he whispered. “I’m not good with emotions and abandonment… I should never have accused you of all that stuff. Obviously I was wrong.”

“You are an asshole… but you’re mine. And I love you for it.”

Then, with the cheers of Sarah and the Pogues in the background, he pulled you in for a kiss. You knew for sure you were crossing a line with your parents, but at that time you couldn’t really find it in yourself to care. You were way too focused on the beautiful boy you loved. The beautiful boy who loved you back.

#outer banks #outer banks netflix #outer banks imagine #outer banks x reader #jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #obx #obx netflix #obx imagine #obx x reader #male reader #jj maybank x male reader

[sushiburritonoms]

@ofcoming4th requested from the AU fic list:

43: falling in love with their best friend’s partner au

There's many characters I can see cheating, but Din and Luke aren't two of them. So have soft pining and breakups instead.

They could all hear Bo screaming at the top of her lungs at Din in the parking lot next to the bar, even over the obnoxiously loud bar music.  Thankfully it was loud enough so he didn’t hear the exact words, but the rage and shrill peaks of their argument still made their way over to Luke. He slumped further into his seat, cradling his right stump close to his chest, and did his best to pretend he heard nothing.

Wedge made no such effort. His boyfriend was leaning towards the slightly open window with Boba.  “It’s the kid argument again,” Wedge said with a shake of his head.  “Damn, Din, you gotta let that go.”

“He needs to dump the bitch,” Boba growled. “I’m sick of him putting up with this shit.”

“Agreed,” Cara said from her seat across from Luke.  “It’s fine if Bo-Katan wants that child-free life, but don’t keep Mando from it if that’s what he wants.”

Fennec took another sip of beer. “How did this even come up? I thought we all agreed not to talk about crotch droppings and other domestic shit.” She had arrived late, just in time to see Bo-Katan drag Din out by his leather jacket.

“Crotch droppings,” Cara snorted. “Ha--good one.”

Boba pointed a finger at Luke. “Fucking Skywalker’s fault.”

Luke sighed. “All I said was that I was watching Ben this weekend.” He slumped further into his seat when he saw Wedge twitch at the mention of his nephew.

Ok, maybe it was his fault. Children were a sensitive topic for both Bo-Katan and Wedge and he’d already had a massive row with his boyfriend earlier about his agreement to watch Ben for the weekend. Luke knew better. But when Din had asked what his plans were he’d just let the words slip out of him. Truth was, he liked having Ben around. He couldn’t help it if Wedge was uninterested in playing Uncle to an (admittedly difficult) child.

More than that, it wasn’t fair to Luke. Leia and Han deserved a break from being parents once and a while and there was no one else his sister could turn to besides him and Chewie. Chewie was in Oaxaca for the month visiting his family, so that left Luke. He’d already arranged it so he would watch Ben at Han and Leia’s house, leaving Wedge alone in their apartment for the weekend. What more did his boyfriend want from him?

There was more shouting outside--this time it was Din’s voice.  It must have been a bad one if Din was raising his voice enough for them to hear it.

“This is why I keep my gay ass out of the whole family conversation,” Cara sighed. “Kids are more trouble than they’re worth.”

“Kids are fine. Dealing with parents is the real nightmare,” Boba said, surprising them all with the seriousness in his voice.

“Kids are expensive, loud, needy, and too much work,” Wedge countered. He wasn’t looking at Luke but he felt tense all the same.  “I can reason with adults more than I can with kids.”

“HA! You’re telling me you’d rather put up with Solo than his kid?” laughed Boba. “I’ll take Solo Jr any day.”

“I happen to like Han,” Wedge grumbled.

‘He really doesn’t’, Luke thought sadly.  Han and Wedge were barely cordial these days. Maybe once, back when Luke and Wedge were still flying together in the same squadron, but now that Luke was out of the Air Force and living as a civilian things were strained between his family and Wedge.

Basically, everything about Luke’s life was wrong since his accident. Losing his hand turned out to be the easiest thing to adapt to because he’d had lots of physical support from his medical team, his liaison with the VA, and his family. Sure, his prosthetic wasn’t great, but he’d adapt, and now that he was out of the Force he could smoke his pain away. Nobody expected him to get a job right now and the inheritance from his mother was more than enough to scrape by.

What he hadn’t adapted to was the new strain in his relationship with his boyfriend. Wedge was still enlisted and could be redeployed at a moment’s notice.  Their apartment on base meant that Luke was constantly surrounded by the life he’d been abruptly ripped from and it hurt to see men and women walk by in blues or to hear the screech of fighter jets constantly overhead.  He felt like a damn military spouse, buying food at the commissary every Friday and getting sucked into random conversations about the rising price of beef.  He knew that Wedge desperately wanted Luke to reconsider the Force’s offer to transfer him to the USAF Test Pilot School down at Edwards, but he had no interest in retraining for aerospace.  He wasn’t smart enough for NASA or SpaceX either.

He wasn’t a hotshot anymore. Why was he still living like a parody of one?

Luke came back to himself when he felt Wedge squirm beside them. “I think they’re done,” he said quietly.  Luke listened and sure enough, he heard nothing but country music belting from the bar’s stereos.

“Do you think he’s coming back?” asked Cara.

“The bitch better not,” Boba hissed.

“Maybe someone should go check to see if they’re gone?” Fennec suggested.  “Otherwise we’re paying for their tab.” The table groaned.

“I’ll go,” Luke said as he stumbled to his feet.  It was his fault Din was in this situation, to begin with. He looked to see if Wedge was going to argue but the other man was already focused on trying to badger someone to play darts with him.

That used to be their thing before Luke lost his throwing hand.

Fuck, his life was pathetic.

He marched out of the bar, dragging his jacket behind him. The cold autumn air hit him like a slap to the face as he stepped outside.  The sun was gone and the only lights around were the bar and one sad streetlight several feet away from him. Luke squinted as his eyes adjusted to the darkness and he looked around for a familiar black leather jacket or blue dress. “Din? Bo?”

A flicker of light appeared at the edge of his vision and Luke turned to see Din lighting up a cig while leaning against the wall of the bar.  “She’s gone.”  There was no emotion, no heat, behind his words.  The only thing illuminating Din was his lighter and it cast shadows that distorted his face, hiding his facial features like a mask. It was hard to see if he was truly upset by Bo-Katan’s absence or not.

“I’m so sorry. I knew better than to bring Ben up--”

“You did nothing wrong.” Din took a deep drag.  “Don’t apologize.”  Din leaned his head back and Luke could hear the soft thump as he hit the brick wall.  “You wanna…” Din held up his cigarette carton and let his words trail off.

“Sure.”  Luke struggled to pull on his jacket one-handed but Din waited patiently until he was covered. He let Luke pull out a cigarette before he put the carton back into his pocket and pulled out his silver zippo so he could light it for him.

Luke promised Leia he’d try to cut back, but every time he went out to a bar the cravings hit him like a tidal wave.   There was something about being in a dark loud bar with friends that made him crazy for the first rush of nicotine in his system. As he took a long drag he almost moaned at the sensation of smoke curling up deep inside of him. It seeped out of his nose and dragged with it the minor aches and pains that he constantly lived with. That was probably why Din kept it up too.  You could watch a tiny bit of your life pull away from you and curl up into the evening air.

They were silent for a good long while, just taking turns blowing smoke and listening to the raunchy laughter of the servicemen and women inside.  If not for the ever-present awareness Luke had of his missing hand he could almost pretend this was a year ago, before his crash, when Din and Bo-Katan were having a good patch and contemplating marriage.  When Wedge still looked at Luke like he wanted him and when he could just fly away from all his problems. Just him and the endless sky.

“She’s really gone,” Din said finally, breaking the silence and Luke’s self-pity.  He flicked away the butt of his cig and turned to look at Luke.  “It’s over.”

Fuck.  Luke took one last greedy hit before he stomped the rest out with his shoe. “I’m so, so, sorry.”

“I’m not.”  Luke could see Din’s eyes tracking him in the darkness, carefully watching his reaction.  “We should have ended it a long time ago. I knew she was never going to change her mind about getting married and starting a family. That’s just not Kryze.”

Luke couldn’t imagine Bo-Katan as a mother either. He’d never wanted to frankly, and had never seen what Din saw in her. It wasn’t just because he was gay either. “She didn’t deserve you anyway.” On this, the entire friend group was in agreement. Din had lousy taste in women and men.

“Cliché, Skywalker,” Din teased him.  “Are you gonna offer me some wine and chocolate next?”

“Nothing wrong with drinking wine,” Luke shot back.  He had a bottle back ...home.

Home with Wedge.  Luke’s face fell as soon as the thought crossed his mind.

“Hey.” Din nudged Luke with his shoulder. “You ok?”

“That’s supposed to be my line.”

Din shook his head. “You look like shit.”

“Thanks.”

“Is therapy going ok?” Din looked concerned now and Luke was overcome with a wave of affection. Here was Din, freshly dumped by his long-time girlfriend, and yet he was worried about him.

“It’s going.” Luke waved his stump for emphasis. “Still waiting for my cosmetic hand.  You know how the VA is.” Incompetent and full of red tape.

“It’s been six months,” Din said with a frown.

Luke shrugged.

“Can’t Wedge pull some strings for you?”

“He’s a Captain, not a miracle worker.” Plus that would require Luke and Wedge to actually talk about his missing hand instead of dancing around it.

“You’re not talking to him again, are you?” Din’s fingers twitched and he knew that the other man was longing for another cigarette.  But they were both trying--and failing--to quit so he probably would stand in pain until the craving completely overwhelmed him...five minutes from now.

Luke sighed. He knew Din would see right through his answer. They’d known each other for years now since Luke first hooked up with Wedge after Iraq. Din had been one of the few friends that bothered to visit Luke in the hospital right after his crash.  He’d come as often as his duties would allow, bringing him magazines, snacks, and plenty of base gossip. He’s been Luke’s lifesaver and after he was finally discharged he found himself dragged into Din’s orbit more frequently, standing next to him as they held up the walls of every bar in town with a cloud of smoke. Din knew the basic details of his deteriorating relationship with Wedge; more than anyone else except maybe his sister.

“There’s nothing left to say,” Luke finally admitted.  Nothing that they hadn’t already dissected, fought, and screamed over.

“Luke.” He felt Din’s hand on his shoulder and he looked up into sympathetic brown eyes. “You two either need to get some help or finally end it.” He lessened the harshness of his words by offering another cigarette to him with his other hand.

Leia was going to kill him.

Luke let Din put the cig in his mouth and light it for him.  The intoxication of the smoke and the closeness of his friend made him dizzy and lightheaded. Din reeked of smoke, leather, and stale beer, and yet it was comforting all the same.

“We never talked about any of this,” Luke admitted. “I never thought I’d leave.” Except maybe via a body bag. He knew Wedge felt the same way, as did nearly everyone in Luke’s squadron. That’s why their visits had been short and performative after his accident.  His squadmates pitied and feared him...and he didn’t blame any of them for that.

“Well, I’m done.” Din lit up and turned to blow the smoke away from Luke’s face. “I’m done with all of this shit. I’m discharging and going back to college.”

“Y-you...really?” Luke stuttered. He knew Din’s IRR was almost up but he just assumed he’d re-elist like all of their friends.  “You’re gonna leave Boba and Cara?”

You’re gonna leave me?

“Fett, Dune, and Bo are lifers. I never saw myself extending even this long.  That last fight, it wasn’t just that I wanted a family and Bo-Katan didn’t. She’s committed and this is just a job for me.” The look on Din’s face was peaceful. He met Luke’s confused eyes with calm focus.

“Oh.” Luke didn’t know what else to say. Good on you? Good luck?

Din sighed. “Wedge is one of them.” Din jerked his head towards the wall of the bar. “He’s never gonna leave until they give him the boot. You know that right?”

Luke nodded wordlessly. Until he lost his hand he’d thought he was one of them too.

“Look, I’m not gonna tell you how to live your life. Just do me a favor.  You listening?” Din paused until Luke squirmed uncomfortably and nodded. “Try to put yourself first for once in your life. You deserve more than this too.”

Then Din stepped away. He threw the end of his cig on the floor and stomped it out.  “I’m gonna head out. You can tell the others everything, I’m sure they’ll all be thrilled.”

Luke shook his head to try to find his voice again. “Hell no, I’m not telling them you’re leaving!” Fuck that was going to be a disaster conversation.

Din laughed. “Ok fair enough. Just tell them about Bo. Cara will owe Boba $50 so she might as well get paid now before the idiot spends it all on booze.” Then without waiting for Luke to reply, Din started to walk towards his bike with his hands in his pockets.

Luke watched as Din walked away, with his head held up high. He looked lighter already. Letting go of Bo-Katan must have settled the anguish that had permeated his entire being for months now. It was strange, Luke had grown used to seeing Din with slumped shoulders and downturned lips. Whenever he had visited him at the VA, he’d always looked so beaten.  But now, he was walking away like a new man.

More than that, he looked like the old Din again. The one Luke had once found very attractive before he’d gotten too involved with Wedge to notice other people around him.  It was like watching someone reappear in his scope of vision while he was in the cockpit of his fighter, or like watching a bird reappear from the clouds.

“Din!” Luke shouted.  He watched as the other man turned back. He meant to say something appreciative, a thank you for the smokes and the advice. Instead what slipped out of his lips was, “I’m taking Ben to the zoo this weekend! Do you want to come?”

He didn’t know what exactly possessed him to say that, but it was worth it to see Din’s face break out into a real honest-to-god smile. “Yeah, sure. Text me!”

He watched Din until the man disappeared with a loud roar of his Harley, until his cigarette was ashes in his fingers and he felt his own smile finally fade away.

---

Previous responses

28. Knocking on the wrong door (Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan)

38.cop/person getting a speeding ticket au (Din/Luke)

30: tourist/knowledgeable local au (Din/Luke)

19. parents meeting when they take their kids to class au (Din/Luke)

15: meeting in the E.R/A&E au (Din/Luke/Boba)

40: Soul destroying exes meeting again after not speaking for years au (Din/Luke)

25: Library/Avid Reader AU Part I (Din/Luke)

Library AU part II (Din/Luke, Obi-Wan/Qui-Gon)

#warnings: a lot of foul language and Fennec says rude things about children #also I don't know jack shit about the US Air Force #forgot to mention in this AU don't ask don't tell never happened and homophobia aint a thang #I feel like Wedge was very OOC and I apologize I just assume he's a bit of a jerk in this AU #their squadron is not Rogue Squadron they are generic meatheads #the US military is a trauma into itself and would change people's personalities for sure #ok please I beg of all of you never make me write bo-katan and din again #sbficlets #Din/Luke #if you squint

[comicaurora]

aaaa this is not technically a question, but I love how you draw fight scenes/action in both the comic and in all the legends/myths summarized videos!! It's so goodddd even tho you like to say how much you get tired of the process of choreographing fight scenes i think you really pull them off spectacularly!! do u perhaps have any tips... besides the usual looking at a bunch of refs and such- do you take inspo from action movies maybe? id love to know because like ur just so skilled red how

!!!! this is such a sweet question!

I’m so glad the choreography works! It’s difficult for me to gauge how engaging they are to read - I’m usually just focusing on making sure the movement makes sense from panel to panel. I’ve read a lot of manga where the fight scenes are beautifully drawn but frankly incomprehensible, because I have no idea how the characters are supposed to be moving in relation to each other. Because of this, when I choreograph a fight, I try and make sure the movement is clear from one panel to the next.

When drawing fight scenes for videos, I tend to exaggerate the movements a bit more than I might in a comic, since I’m usually trying to communicate the entirety of a fight scene in only one or two frames. Especially in the Journey to the West videos, I tend to give the characters very stretched poses - legs bent all the way up to the chest or stretched all the way back, arms completely extended, etc. In real life, overextending a limb is a very bad idea in a fight, but in the wonderful world of visual art, it usually looks a lot better than the more safe and realistic partially-bent option. I try to make sure the poses are all plausible, but for me, that stretch component is very important. It gives the illusion of effort - you can almost feel how the character would feel.

This frame demonstrates the stretch factor with Monkey’s entire pose, but it also demonstrates another important factor - flow. Anywhere there’s movement, I want there to be something flowing to show it. Monkey’s tail and sash and Tripitaka’s robes are very useful for this, and having a lot of characters with long hair or flowing capes also makes my job a lot easier.

Stretch makes the poses feel lively and full of movement. Flow makes it clear to the audience how the characters in this still image are supposed to be moving. Between those two factors, it becomes pretty intuitive to communicate a lot of energy in any given panel.

Of course, chaining panels together to make sure the movement is actually coherent is a different skillset altogether, and one I’m still working on. In my experience, the easiest way to make that work is coherent direction of movement.

This post is getting long, so I’m gonna try putting in a “read more”:

Using that fight scene as an example, the direction of movement shifts at the top of the page when Kendal rounds the tree. In the first panel, movement is from right to left. He pivots in panel 2, and then in panel 3, he’s abruptly attacked in a sudden burst of left-to-right movement. This is a new action; it’s fine that it’s moving in a new, opposed direction.

Kendal catches himself as he falls forward - this is still a left-to-right movement, because he’s still falling from the events of panel 3, so continuity of movement is to be expected. But the middle panel shifts focus again, because something new and unexpected is happening - his attacker is about to get kicked in the face.

In that center panel, the direction is no longer left-to-right - it’s out-to-in. We’re essentially zooming along the movement to accentuate its suddenness. Even if you can’t quite make out the detail of the boot, the movement is still pretty clear. The next panel brings us back to our familiar arrangement from panel 3, but this time, the movement has been reversed and is moving right-to-left again, as Kendal kicks back and gains the upper hand.

Finally, in the last panel of the page, the movement becomes a bit more directionless. His attacker is still moving right-to-left, continuing the flow from the impact, but the focus has shifted. The movement and overall flow is unclear, which reflects the fact that, at this point, the fight has become a stalemate.

Chaining movement together like this is tricky, as is representing clear movement in a single panel. You know it’s tricky because a lot of otherwise good media kinda sucks at it. For instance, I quite like My Hero Academia, but I’ve been keeping up with the manga for months and I have literally no idea what’s happening in these protracted superhero fights.

This next bit is going to contain spoilers from the most recent chapter, but it demonstrates my issue way too well for me to leave out:

This image has a clear direction of movement, but I have literally no idea what’s happening, except that someone might be about to get punched. (The next set of panels is not someone getting punched. It’s a flashback that lasts eight and a half pages.) The next panel that continues this action is this one:

It follows through on the clear right-to-left direction of movement established from the earlier panel, but it’s (a) still totally unclear what just actually happened, and (b) interrupted by eight and a half pages of other stuff. The panels individually look phenomenal (if a little speed-line-heavy for me) but it’s hard to know what’s actually happening. All we know is that movement happened; we can’t actually tell what happened in that movement.

In contrast, for a comic that does movement INCREDIBLY well, I recommend Usagi Yojimbo. It’s a comic about a wandering samurai who happens to be a rabbit, and all the Kurosawa-esque antics he gets into in his wanderings through ancient funny-animal Japan.

Uh oh! A setup for a fight scene! And that’s a lot of left-to-right movement I’m seeing! Even the swords in shot are all pointing that specific direction!

Oh, never mind. He’s fine. See all that right-to-left movement our hero is doing? See how the bad guys are suddenly pointing in all different directions and their movement has become chaotic and uncertain? That’s how you know the fight’s literally going our hero’s way.

This is a random encounter from a random issue of the comic. Fights happen frequently, and most of them follow the same structure - right down to the direction of movement. Bad guys move in from the left, good guy fights back from the right.

And when the fight proper starts, the background usually vanishes into a vague white void so the characters can take center stage - no visual cluttering, not even any speed lines.

These fights aren’t important. These random background mooks aren’t plot-relevant except as temporary roadblocks. As such, most of these fights play out roughly the same - no background, page-wide panels, minimal dialogue. But the serious fights? Those look pretty different.

Environmental shots! Close-ups! Banter! Backgrounds! The direction of movement is even reversed from the norm! This immediately sets the fight apart from the standard. Characters move around each other, the environment come into play, and each panel is a very clear beat in the progress of the fight.

Usagi Yojimbo is probably my favorite comic ever. But it’s also not the only very useful resource when you’re looking for media that does well-choreographed fights. Comics are good (even if a lot of them are just good bad examples), but animated media is built on a lot of the same principles as comic art. While they have an easier time showing movement (since they involve actual movement, rather than static images) they still need to chain shots together in a way that’s coherent and gives the audience enough information to understand the movement and progression of the situation. Movies and tv won’t help you much with drawing individual static images that communicate dynamic poses, but they can help a lot if you’re figuring out how one phrase of the fight should chain into the next.

While I’ve seen plenty of media that does this well, rather than making you analyze this stuff from the ground up, allow me to recommend a youtube channel that can do the analysis for you:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mACKHGfdLlo&ab_channel=JillBearup

Jill Bearup has a wonderful channel with a criminally small subscriber base. I only found her within the last month and I think she’s amazing. Everyone should watch her videos about fight choreography.

This answer got much longer than I expected, but I hope it was helpful!

#aurora #asks #art

[zootopiathingz]

Into the Wilde

Harsh Reality

Another day, another 200 dollars. Despite the whole situation at Jumbeaux's Café, Finnick and I were able to stay on schedule and we sold enough popsicles to feed a whole slice of lemmings—which we did. It's the easiest money we made in a long time.

After selling the sticks to the foremen in Little Rodentia, Finnick and I drive back to an empty alley so we can split the money. I count the dollars as I hand them down to him, and once it's even I pocket my own share of the money, eating one of the leftover popsicles that I have kept for myself. Hey, this business isn't easy work, I deserve a little treat once in a while.

"Way to work that diaper, big guy." I say to Finnick as he takes off the elephant costume. He hops up into his van, saying nothing to me. He must be mad about what I did at the ice cream shop. Only one way to be sure. "Hey, no kiss bye-bye for Daddy?" I tease him.

He spits out the pacifier as he slams the door shut, turning to me with a cold glare. Yep, he's mad. "You kiss me tomorrow, I'll bite your face off!" He warns, starting the van. He puts on a pair of shades and starts blasting his weird hip-hop music. "Ciao." He says more calmly before driving away.

I might have gone too far by making him cranky, but then again I can't recall a time when he's ever been, you know, happy. Well, now that work is done I guess all that's left for me to do is wander the streets for the millionth time.

But as I watch Finnick drive off, I suddenly hear a voice saying something to me. And as I turn my head, I see the bunny from earlier. Only this time she's not quite as friendly. She must've finally gotten wise and realize what really happened at the café.

"Well, I stood up for you, and you lied to me." She says, stomping her foot. "You liar!"

I'm not intimidated by her, if anything her anger is kind of amusing. "It's called a hustle, sweetheart." I say simply. But then I try to act innocent and shift blame to someone else, "And I'm not the liar. He is!" I point in the other direction. The second she looks away, I bolt.

Well, I almost get away with it. But I don't turn the corner fast enough and I can hear her shouting. She catches up to me quickly and walks by my side, but I barely even glance at her. "Alright slick Nick, you're under arrest!"

"Really? For what?" I ask, chewing on what's left of my popsicle. This should be good.

"Gee, I don't know. How about selling food without a permit, transporting undeclared commerce across borough lines, false advertising..." She lists off. Damn, what a shame for her that she wouldn't get to see any excitement today. Does she really think this is my first day on the job?

I pull out the certificate from my pocket and hold it up in front of her face. "Permit," I turn it around, "receipt of declared commerce," I quickly pull it away, stopping in my path as we reach a crosswalk. "And I didn't falsely advertise anything. Take care."

"You told that mouse the popsicle sticks were redwood!" She accuses, pointing her finger at me.

Ah, she heard that. Well, it's still not false advertising, 'cause I wasn't wrong. I hand her my finished popsicle stick, "That's right. Red wood. With a space in the middle. Wood that is red."

The crosswalk light changes and I make my way across, yet she still follows me. I'm not sure why the conversation has to go on, but if that's how it has to be. "You can't touch me, Carrots. I've been doing this since I was born." I say to her, ignoring the group of wildebeest that's crossing the street as well.

"You're gonna wanna refrain from calling me 'Carrots'." The bunny says threateningly.

"My bad, I just naturally assumed you came from some little carrot-choked Podunk, no?" I look back at her, seeing she struggles to get through the wildebeest. I almost laugh, but she makes it out before it can become entertaining.

She catches back up to me as we reach the other side of the street. "Uh, no. Podunk is in Deerbrooke County and I grew up in Bunnyburrow." She says, weirdly proud of that. If she's still trying to be intimidating, it's not working.

I was right before, she's not from here, which explains a lot. And I guess she has yet to face disappointment. Well Carrots, prepare to have your mind blown.

"Okay, tell me if this story sounds familiar." I begin, snatching a few blueberries from a food stand. I'm pretty sure the bunny sees it, but I could care less. Stealing a couple berries isn't what's going to put me in jail. "Naive little hick with good grades and big ideas decides, 'Hey, look at me, I'm gonna move to Zootopia, where predators and prey live in harmony and sing Kumbaya'! Only to find—whoopsie," I turn around to look at her, still walking down the sidewalk. "We don't all get along. And that dream of becoming a big city cop? Double whoopsie! She's a meter maid."

I turn back around, but I catch a glimpse of her reaction. I must be right about this. I knew it.

"And whoopsie number three-sie, no one cares about her or her dreams. And soon enough those dreams die, and our bunny sinks into emotional and literal squalor, living in a box under a bridge. 'Til finally she has no choice but to go back home with that cute fuzzy-wuzzy little tail between her legs to become..." I pause, looking back at her once again. "You're from Bunnyburrow, is that what you said? So how about a carrot farmer?" I suggest, walking out from the little corner I didn't realize we walked into. "That sound about right?"

The bunny says nothing at first, but I know she's still trying to follow me. I hear her scramble around on the ground, avoiding being trampled by a bypassing rhino. "Be careful now," I warn her from a distance, "Or it won't just be your dreams getting crushed."

"Hey, hey!" She exclaims, running over to walk in front of me. "No one tells me what I can or can't be!" She declares, stopping in our path. It seems she doesn't realize there's wet cement under her. "Especially not some jerk who never had the guts to try to be anything more than a popsicle hustler!"

Eh, it's a lame comeback, but good effort. I bend down to her height so I can face her properly, giving her a smirk. "Alright look, everyone comes to Zootopia thinking they can be anything they want. Well, ya can't. You can only be what you are." I stand back up, gesturing between the two of us, "Sly fox, dumb bunny."

She glares at me, "I am not a dumb bunny."

The cement she's standing finally becomes noticeable, as now she sinks into it without even knowing—which just further proves my point.

"Right." I say, surprised she hasn't realized it yet. "And that's not wet cement."

She looks down in shock, and she's up to her knees in it by now. She tries to break loose, and it's hard not to laugh. But to be honest, I hardly laugh out loud at anything. It's more of an internal thing for me.

"You'll never be a real cop." I say as I walk passed the construction site. "You're a cute meter maid, though! Maybe a supervisor one day!" I look back at her one last time, turning behind a parked car, "Hang in there!"

Yes, I know it's a bit harsh. But she's going to find out eventually. This city crushes free-spirits like her, and I would know. I've seen it time and time again. It's not fair, but what about life is? Anyway, I had to give it to her straight. Sugarcoating doesn't do any good, and if she wants to be a city cop then she's going to have to face the music.

Besides, it's better she hears it from a stranger like me rather than someone who's opinion matters to her. And it's not like I'll ever have to see her again.

She is pretty cute, though. Too bad she's not my type.

#zootopia #nick wilde #judy hopps #finnick zootopia #wildehopps #zootropolis #zootopia fanfiction #fanfic

[iam93percentstardust]

buckytony for the ask game?

1. Coffee shop AU: Who is the barista, and who frequents the coffee shop?

Tony frequents the coffee shop. Bucky has been working at Bean True to Yourself (the owners are hipsters) for the last three years, trying to put himself and Steve through college because while they both got scholarships, it wasn’t enough and Steve’s health doesn’t let him hold a study job. Bucky has gotten pretty good at latte art actually. Only Natasha knows that it’s because he’s got a crush on the cute brunet with the messy hair and Bambi eyes that comes in sleep-deprived every single morning and probably doesn’t even notice the hearts Bucky puts in his lattes.

Tony definitely notices and it’s only because he’s spent so much time in the spotlight that he doesn’t blush every single time he sees the new art. Besides, he remembers when he first started coming here and the latte art was terrible. Bucky’s probably just testing out his artistic skills on Tony cause he knows he won’t judge him. There’s no feelings involved, right?

2. Highschool/College AU: Who is the straight-A student, and who’s the backrow slacker?

Tony has come to the conclusion that the only way to get Howard’s attention is if he puts absolutely no effort into anything at all, which is why he’s currently taking graduate-level courses as Edward Carbonell but Tony Stark is failing out of high school. Any attention is better than no attention, right?

And maybe it helps that his teachers come to him after class and suggest that he find himself a tutor and did you know that Bucky, Mr. Gorgeous himself, works in our tutoring program? I’m sure he’d love to help you, Mr. Stark. Okay, so maybe they don’t call Bucky gorgeous, maybe that’s just Tony’s own mind, but it’s not like he’s wrong. But Tony gave up on school a long time ago and Bucky has a motorcycle and wears leather jackets and is super popular all while having straight-A’s. There’s no way he even knows Tony’s name, let alone would ever like him.

3. Rivals to lovers AU: Who takes their rivalry seriously, and who is half in it just to push the other’s buttons?

Bucky isn’t entirely certain how he ended up as a supervillain’s sidekick and he definitely isn’t sure that he really wants to be there but he won’t deny to himself that the best part of the job is facing off against Iron Lad while Captain America and the Black Widow are fighting each other for control of the Deathstick of Destiny or whatever it is this week.

Iron Lad’s just so cute with his sense of justice and his wit and the conviction that he and Bucky are destined to be nemeses for life. And one time, a building fell on top of them and Bucky got to peel him out of his compromised suit and that was the best thing ever because he got to see Iron Lad’s flight suit, which accentuates the most perfect ass ever. Seriously, Bucky just wants to reach down and squeeze but he’s pretty sure that then Iron Lad might actually use the unibeam that he’s been threatening to use for ages.

4. Enemies to lovers AU: Which one switches sides?

Oof, Bucky does. He comes back from HYDRA to find a world that’s absolutely a bigger mess than he remembers it being and maybe that’s those rose-tinted glasses Sam keeps accusing him and Steve of wearing but he looks at Iron Man, taking out the ultra-wealthy and distributing the money back to the people, and then he looks at the Avengers and how they keep causing more property damage than they can fix and decides that he knows what side he wants to be on.

He slips out of the compound in the dead of night, unnoticed by all except Natasha who just wishes him luck, and tracks Iron Man across two continents and an ocean back to his secret hideout - in Latveria of all places, who knew that Doom could share? - knocks on the door and when a man with the prettiest brown eyes Bucky has ever seen answers the door, Bucky announces, “Hi, I’m here to be a villain.”

In retrospect, he decides as he’s dragging a fainted Tony inside, that might not have been the best way to introduce himself to his future employer.

5. Soulmate AU: Who is eager to meet their soulmate? Who absolutely does not want to meet their soulmate?

The thing is, Tony knows that soulmates aren’t always perfect. His parents were soulmates and they absolutely hated each other. But Ana and Jarvis were soulmates too, and so is Aunt Peggy and Uncle Daniel, and they loved each other very much, so even though he’s been alive for almost 40 years and never once met his soulmate, he still has high hopes.

Bucky fell from the train without knowing his soulmate and the only thing he can thinks is Good. They won’t wind up with someone like Bucky, someone who has nightmares from his time as a lab experiment, who kills people without even blinking, whose main purpose in life is to be the shadow that dogs Steve Rogers’ heels. But then he wakes up.

And then he forgets he ever even had a soulmate.

The next time Bucky remembers anything, it’s 2014, he’s in a glass room (cage, really), and there’s someone standing with their back to him outside of the cage, doing something on a tablet.

“What’s it gonna take to let me out of here?” Bucky asks.

The person jumps, turns, and then a slow smile spreads over his face. “I don’t know, how about dinner?”

Fuck.

6. Single parent AU: Which one is the single parent? (Alt. if they’re both single parents: Which one is open to starting a new relationship from the start? Which one is never planning on finding love again… Until they meet the other and are instantly smitten?)

Harley’s got a protective streak a mile wide (Bucky thinks he’s learned it from Uncle Steve), which is why Bucky isn’t surprised when Harley comes home with a black eye and immediately proclaims that it wasn’t his fault, there were these two big kids picking on a younger girl on the playground.

“Oh yeah and here’s this, I guess,” Harley mumbles and shoves a piece of paper with a phone number on it in Bucky’s direction.

Bucky holds an ice pack up to Harley’s eye and asks, “What’s this?”

“Mr. Stark’s phone number. I said I wanted it in case Peter wanted to play but he seemed nice and looked like your type and I’m tired of you going out with jerks who don’t like me so I got it for you.”

Well, leaving that aside, “Who’s Peter?”

“Morgan’s brother. He’s in my class and he helped when he saw I was helping her out.”

Right, like that explains anything. He dials the number, intent on seeing if this Peter can tell him the full story, only for someone to say, “Stark residence, can I help you?”

Bucky doesn’t believe in love at first sight (er, voice) but whoever it is has got such a pretty voice and he kind of wants to hear them moaning his name so he purrs, “You sure can, doll.”

Maybe he shouldn’t be so surprised when they make an offended sound and hang up.

7. Doctor AU: Which one is the longsuffering doctor? Which one is the patient?

“Mr. Stark, please, I’m begging you, wear PPE when you’re working in your lab.”

“But then when would I get to see you?” Tony chirps, seemingly uncaring that Bucky is setting his fingers.

“At dinner,” Bucky says before he can think better of it.

They both freeze. Then Tony slowly says, “And that’s okay?”

Honestly? Probably not but Tony has been coming to the ER for months for his lab-related injuries and Bucky is always his doctor and they always end up flirting and he’s tired of this back-and-forth. So when he’s done splinting Tony’s fingers, he raises his hand to his mouth and brushes the softest of kisses over the back, smiling when Tony gasps.

8. Bodyguard AU: Who is the bodyguard? Who are they protecting? Which one is secretly pining for the other?

Howard Stark is convinced that someone is out to get him, his wife, and his son. He can easily take care of him and his wife but Tony recently moved out of the mansion, insistent on making his own way in the world so surreptitiously, Howard hires Bucky to keep an eye on Tony by moving into the apartment next door.

It’s probably the easiest job Bucky has ever had because Tony almost never leaves their building, too caught up in his projects as he is. He gets food delivered and sometimes, he has friends over but otherwise, he’s pretty much a recluse.

And that’s a damn shame that is because Bucky has really only seen Tony twice so far and both times have about knocked him flat out on the floor.

9. Pirate AU: Who is the pirate? Who is the member of the royal family who did not sign up for this?

Crown Prince Anthony Edward Stark, first of his name, heir to the throne, would like everyone to know that he absolutely did not sign up for this, no way, no how. Just about everyone on the ship though, sees it when he gives Captain Barnes what he obviously thinks is a secretive wink. And they all know that they’re going to hear it when the captain and his “captive” go below the deck that night.

Sam scratches his head awkwardly and looks over at Admiral Rhodes on the other ship. “You want to come over?” he calls. “They could be down there for a while.”

Rhodes sighs and crosses over. “Chessboard still set up?” he asks.

“Nope, Nat had to move it for one of her poker games. But I remember where the pieces were.”

10. Childhood best friends AU: Which one was super obviously in love with the other the whole time? Who was oblivious until they were older?

Everyone knows that Tony and Bucky are going to get married someday - except for Tony and Bucky themselves. Steve has been trying for ages to get Bucky to see that Tony is pining just as hard for him as Bucky is and Rhodes has been doing the same for Tony but they’re just...so oblivious. It makes Natasha want to bang her head against the wall - or maybe just lock them in a closet.

Except Clint tried that, right after Tony gave Bucky his first kiss when they were fifteen and Bucky just thought it was because they were friends. They’d been in that closet all night and when Clint finally opened the door in the morning, they were snuggling but still not together so he thinks they’re just too oblivious. There’s a school-wide betting pool on if they’ll get their act together before graduation.

(It’s okay though because Tony and Bucky have been dating since they were freshman. They’re just waiting to see how long it takes everyone else to notice.)

#winteriron #alle writes #alle answers #angxlsgrxce

[mandala-lore]

Talk it Out - Data&Tasha fix-it fic

Also posted on ao3. 

Summary: After avoiding him for weeks, Tasha finally sits Data down to discuss their relationship after the events of "The Naked Now". They ultimately decide to put it all behind them, but only after confiding in each other about similar painful histories. Basically just good communication and an excuse for cute character moments. I honestly did not double check facts or details, so I might get some tiny things wrong (like their ranks? idek), but otherwise, this is canon compliant.

-

After a bruise-inducing mission, Tasha was looking forward to a quiet drink and maybe some conversation in Ten Forward. Most of her friends were on shift, so she was pleased to see Commander Data leaning stiffly against the bar, conversing with a waiter. When he noticed her, he nodded politely in her direction and promptly turned to leave. “Hey, wait, Commander. Have a drink with me. I could use some company.” After the day she’d had, and now in a safe, public atmosphere, Tasha felt more relaxed than she had in weeks.

“Thank you, Lieutenant, but I have just remembered a place I need to be.”

Tasha couldn’t help but laugh at his poor excuse. “Commander, are you avoiding me?”

“No,” he looked almost worried. “I simply thought that was the polite reply. You are inviting me to stay out of obligation but would clearly prefer if I leave. Since I have no need for sustenance or socialization, and you do, it seems fitting that I go, and you remain.”

“What makes you think I only want to spend time with you out of obligation? I thought we were friends.” She playfully nudged his arm.  

Data tilted his head and eyed her cautiously. “I presumed you did not enjoy my company. In social situations, you often leave a room if I enter. And you spend considerable effort to avoid looking in my direction. I also have other reasons to believe I make you uncomfortable. I would prefer not to do so.”

“Aw, Data.” Tasha looked disgruntled and ushered him to a quiet corner table. “Look, it’s true I’ve been avoiding you lately. I knew you would figure it out and I should’ve talked with you about it a while ago, but it didn’t seem to impact our work, so I let it slide. I’m sorry.”

“No apology necessary.” Data folded his hands on the table and waited patiently. “What do we need to talk about? Have I…mis-stepped in some way?”

“No. Definitely not. You’ve been very patient and understanding.” She sighed and looked out the observation window. “This is really hard for me.”

“If there is some subject which you find painful to discuss, Lieutenant, please do not force yourself to continue.”

She shook her head and turned back to him. “Sometimes what comes easiest, what’s most comfortable, isn’t the same as what’s right, or necessary. I’ll be ok. It’s just a little… embarrassing to talk about.”

“As an android, I comprehend the basic concepts of embarrassment and shame, but I do not share that human assessment of behavior. You do not need to worry about feeling embarrassed. You can tell me anything.”

“Thanks, I appreciate it. I know I can trust you. The thing is, you do feel respect for certain people, and I guess I’m worried about losing that from you, which is probably silly. But I look up to you and I worry about jeopardizing our friendship.” She sighed. “Ok, here it goes. That…stuff…that happened between us, the day we were all infected and acting strangely? We need to talk about it. And I’m sorry I’ve been pushing you away so much.”

He tilted his head and kept his voice low. “You wish to discuss our sexual encounter?”

Tasha nodded. “I know I was sort of gruff with you after we recovered. I was embarrassed. And, well, logically I knew you weren’t gonna start…bragging about it. But you do have a habit of discussing sensitive topics with your friends. Or sometimes, anyone who will listen.”

As their friendship had progressed, Data had learned to identify when Lt. Yar was actually annoyed and when she was only joking with her companions. This, he determined, was the latter.

She continued, “I was mortified at the thought that you might, I don’t know, let slip what we did. To whoever would answer your questions. I know it was a new experience for you and you might want to talk about it. And maybe some part of me was afraid of the things other men have said about me in the past. It was irrational to think you'd behave that way too.”

“I understand.” His face was neutral, and his hands remained folded on the table, but Tasha found a comfort in his stoicism. “Many people have pointed out that my candor can be socially unacceptable.”

She wrinkled her nose with a polite laugh. “I guess I was so worked up about how I felt, and focused on trying to move on from it, I neglected to think about how you might be affected. So, just this once, let’s talk about it. If you have questions or, I don’t know, any reactions, I’ll try to help.”

“That is kind,” Data’s forehead wrinkled thoughtfully. “But I do not have any questions about our encounter. You were very receptive to my inquiries during the event and I was able to monitor your levels of enjoyment despite my own incapacitation.”

“Yeah, I guess I was pretty vocal…” Tasha’s cheeks turned a light pink. “Wait, you could monitor my… You could tell when I…”

“Achieved climax? Yes. I believe I mentioned that.”

“Oh for the love of-“ She pinched the bridge of her nose. “You probably did but I was kind of distracted. I guess it was silly of me to think you’d have questions about sex. I’m sure you’ve read every book, so to speak.”

He nodded, slightly deterred from continuing their conversation due to her increasing embarrassment. “It is not that I do not have questions about sexual relationships. I simply have no further need to dwell on this specific encounter. In fact, if you prefer Lt., I could simply delete the necessary memory files and save what I learned from them.”

“No!” She squared her shoulders and raked her fingers nervously through her cropped hair. “No, you don’t have to do that. Actually, I think I prefer that you don’t.”

“Very well.” His eyes roamed her face and body for social cues. “Lt, please do not feel any obligation to discuss details which make you uncomfortable. You do not owe me any explanation.” He paused to emphasize how serious he was. “If you are open to discussing it further, I am only puzzled by your reaction after we recovered from the virus. You were ashamed that someone might learn about what we had done. Because I am an android. Is that correct?”

She met his eyes then and the blush left her face. Instead, she looked grave, almost upset. She opened her mouth to speak several times, before settling on, “No.”

She said it firmly, then reached for his hands still folded before them. He accepted her hand curiously. Her lips pursed as she continued, “Ok. Maybe a little. But, Data, this is very important to me. I need you to understand that my shame isn’t because you’re an android and I think you’re…lesser or somehow unworthy, or whatever else you might be thinking.”

“I do not understand.”

“Data, I’ve had some unpleasant experiences. And my home world is about as hospitable to young women as a blackhole is to starships. Beyond all that, I worked very hard to earn my position here, and just like you, there are people who don’t think I deserve my job, or that I can perform my duties as well as my colleagues who are male, or from other worlds, with different backgrounds.” She shook her head and leaned in closer. “A long time ago, even before the academy, I learned to put on a certain…bravado. Like a persona. I behave in certain ways so that people will take me seriously, not underestimate me. On my planet, it was a matter of survival. But even at the academy, even here on the Enterprise, I try to make sure everyone sees me just the way I want to be seen. Responsible. Capable. Serious.”

“I think I understand,” Data replied. “I have had similar…experiences. I consider my behavior and service to be the best way to prove my capability to those who might doubt my sentience.”

Tasha nodded gravely. “The virus was freeing in a way,” she continued. “I guess I didn’t realize how deeply I had repressed some of my feelings. It brought everything to the surface and all I could think about afterwards was how ashamed I would feel if more people had seen me that way. I have a reputation to maintain,” she laughed, trying to lighten the mood. “But Data, none of that had anything to do with you or the fact that you’re an android.”

He pondered her confession and filed several important details away for later examination. “Thank you for confiding in me. I believe I now understand why our encounter was best kept secret. I too spent considerable time thinking about my behavior. I have maintained your request for silence on the matter of our relationship.”

“Thanks,” she answered sheepishly.

“However, you answered ‘maybe a little’. I am correct, then, in my assumption that you feel particularly embarrassed about having sex with an android, more so than if I had been human. And this compounds the shame you felt behaving in a way that does not befit your rank or projected self-image?”

She took a minute to process what he was asking, then squeezed his hand firmly before retreating and folding her hands on the table to mirror his. “Data. I would’ve been embarrassed no matter who I slept with. But I was very ashamed of myself after the fact, because I know that I chose you specifically because I guessed that you were inexperienced and couldn’t feel physical pleasure. I wanted a partner who would be…malleable…and entirely focused on my needs. It was selfishly motivated and shortsighted and,” she scoffed and bit the inside of her cheek to stop from tearing up. “Data, I’m ashamed I treated you that way. I’m worried about what other people might think about how I treated you. They might think I was…using you. And maybe they wouldn’t be entirely wrong.”

“I am still unclear. You recognized that you needed certain traits in a partner, traits I embody. I willingly provided what you requested. Neither of us expressed discomfort or displeasure, until after we recovered. But you worry about how others will interpret our encounter. And you feel that you used me in some way?”

“Yes. Data, I promise you, I have nothing but respect for you, not just because of your rank, but because you’re you. And I value our friendship. But knowing that I chose you specifically because you were an android… Well, I’m ashamed of myself. And I know some people would think I did it because I thought of you as an object or something. Which isn’t true!” She was visibly upset now but maintained composure. Tasha didn’t care, as long as she could get him to understand. “I do not think of you as a thing. Believe me, I know what it’s like to constantly second guess if everyone around you is only humoring you, pretending to allow you some dignity. I would never want to do that to you or anyone else. So I feel guilty that I treated you that way, or that others might think that I did…”

Data tilted his head, considering. “So you are not ashamed at having a sexual experience with an android?”

“No. Not at all.”

“Then I am not harmed. You should not feel shame or guilt.”

“Data, it’s not that simple. I was under the influence but I still made a decision about you based on the fact that you’re an android. I feel like I objectified you. I worry that others will perceive it that way and feel justified in their own mistreatment of you. I feel like I used you. It’s awful to me because it’s the sort of situation I’ve spent my life avoiding with other people and I ended up subjecting my friend to it.”

“Tasha,” Data used her personal name, hoping to establish trust and calm. His voice was quiet and slow. “I do not feel used. And I do not think you treated me like an object.”

She looked frustrated and sad. “Data. I…”

“Please understand that I have learned to tell the difference between being of use and being used. Tasha, you said you sought out a partner you could trust, someone who would not use you for their own pleasure. You were correct in your assumptions. I do not feel pleasure. Nevertheless, I derived a certain satisfaction from providing you with yours. And now, after discussing the matter with you, I am honored you felt you could trust me. I was curious about sex and you were extremely helpful in sating some of that curiosity. I hope you do not feel used.”

“No, of course not. You mean, you actually enjoyed it?” She looked relieved.

“As much as I am capable of enjoying any activity. Yes.”

“I’m glad. But I don’t know if enjoying it excuses the way I…”

“Tasha.” He spoke more firmly now. “I do not think you would feel this distraught about how you may have caused me harm if you truly thought of me as inferior. Your concern for my well-being, as well as your concern for how others might interpret our relationship, proves to me that you did not…use me. You enjoyed an activity with a friend you could trust. Does that seem…accurate?”

Tasha wiped a tear away and felt a weight evaporate from her shoulders. “Yeah. Yes, I think so.”

“Good. Then, per your original request, we never need to speak of it again. Any lingering curiosity I have about human sexuality is not worth risking your discomfort or our friendship.”

“Commander?”

“Yes, Lieutenant?”

“I’m really glad it happened. But let’s never do that again.” She laughed and could’ve sworn she saw a smirk tug at the corners of Data’s mouth.

“Agreed. Since our encounter, I have deduced that a relationship between officers is too complicated. I am looking forward to spending time with you again. As friends.”

Tasha didn’t feel the need to point out to her friend that looking forward to something was an emotional response. “I missed you too, Data."

#data/tasha #data soong #data (star trek) #tasha yar #st: tng #st:tng #data fic #anyway i cry a lot inside when i think about data worrying about tasha #he is SOFT and KIND and tasha deserved infinitely better than her crummy death #and he just....keeps her hologram....in his desk.....i cAN'T #personal #mine #my writing #fanfic

[amphtaminedreams]

The Women of Euphoria and Personal Style: Lookbook no.8

Hi to anyone reading,

I hope you’re well considering everything going on! It feels weird to want to talk about fashion or TV shows or red carpets or whatever when 90% of my Google searches are COVID-19 related but there you go. It’s all about trying to power through as normal (minus the social interaction) and pretend the world isn’t ending, right? Queue nervous laughter.

And as if things aren't shitty enough, production of season 2 of Euphoria has been postponed until further notice. 

Okay, in the grand scheme of things, having to wait a bit longer for a TV show isn’t catastrophic but it does just about sum up the transition from 2019 to 2020 thus far that after HBO redeemed itself by broadcasting Euphoria in the summer following an ending to Game of Thrones that has made the whole series unrewatchable, the glimmer of hope in me reignited by the prospect of series 2 this year has been quickly dashed. 2021, I’m rooting for you, because it doesn’t seem like things are getting better any time soon, and in all seriousness, I think everyone needs a break from the collective suffering of the last few months.

For me (and undoubtedly for many others if the hundreds of makeup looks and styling videos are anything to go by), Euphoria’s effect on the world of fashion and beauty is unprecedented. I really can’t recall a TV show in living memory that has had as much of an impact on the way young people dress. I mean, this might partially be because the style of the characters already kind of caters to and draws from the target audience but also, aside from Blair Waldorf did anybody really give THAT much of a fuck about what anybody in Gossip Girl wore?

The draw of the styling on Euphoria is that it has something for everyone. The style of each of the main girls, Rue, Kat, Maddy, Jules and Cassie, all of whom I’ve attempted (emphasis on attempted!) to base (emphasis on base!) outfits around, is varied and distinctive but still so current and realistic at the same time. It’s also consistent; even if you don’t own the specific pieces worn by any of them, similar shapes and details reoccur enough in different looks throughout the series that it’s not hard to create an outfit which matches your favourite character’s overall vibe without buying anything new. That’s kinda what I have attempted to do here and without further ado, I’m gonna get on with it! First up:

Jules (Played by Hunter Schafer)

When it comes to whose style is the most experimental, Jules is the obvious answer. A lot of her outfits are what I imagine a cartoonist in the near-distant future will envision their cool girl protagonist wearing. Whilst her ensembles are generally whimsical and girly for the most part, there’s usually a few slightly punk-ish finishing touches thrown in there too be it through chunky shoes or bold makeup or that incredible mesh trench coat she wears in the series finale with the trans symbol on the back which, honestly, deserves a moment of silence. 

There are definitely nods to current fashion trends sprinkled throughout her wardrobe too. I'm not going to lie, despite someone at work seemingly thinking it was an insult to tell me I look like someone who does (I still don’t know but this person has a Rick and Morty keyring so I don’t give it too much weight), I’ve never watched any anime. BUT, that being said, given the abundance of anime screenshots posted by all these aesthetic oriented Instagram and Tumblr moodboard accounts, I have a vague idea of what some of the more iconic characters look like and a lot of Jules’ looks seem to be very much modelled after or at least inspired by them. In a way, I see a lot of her looks as a blend between modern “e-girl”, Y2K skater chick (yes, I’m thinking early Avril Lavigne), and 2013 Tumblr “hipster” a la 2014 Joanna Kutcha and Charlie Barker, and though on paper that sounds like a nightmare combination, it works. I know-if that sentence were a Depop description I would’ve just gained 30 followers.

When it comes to my own interpretation of Jules’ style, it’s definitely something I like to channel when I’m putting together a proper OUTFIT outfit. Meaning an outfit I actually put effort into and thus will most likely want to get a good photo in, lol. The way her character dresses is almost quite Christopher Kane in that it’s fresh and unusual but still understated enough that I wouldn’t walk into a room wearing any of these feeling like I’m doing a Rick Owens runway.

I’m not TOO far out of my comfort zone but still at the same time, I’d be trying something new and maybe a little bit more zany than I'm used to. As for noting where any of these pieces are from, only a few have been bought in the last 6 months, but from left to right clockwise I have marked out those that have in case they’re still available (though be wary of the fact that it seems a lot of online clothes stores are still forcing warehouse employees to work in close confines at the moment and so perhaps aren’t operating the most ethically):

LOOK 1

Corset-Jaded London

Shoes-TK Maxx

LOOK 2

Dress-Motel Rocks

Boots-Koi Vegan Footwear

LOOK 3

Dress-Jaded London

LOOK 4

Dress-Jaded London

Beret-Ebay

LOOK 5

Beret-Ebay

LOOK 6

Mesh Top-Depop

Hair Clips-Urban Outfitters

Kat (Played by Barbie Ferreira) 

Eurgh, Kat. 

I LOVE THIS BITCH.

If I had to choose my favourite character in the show, it would be a very close toss-up between her and Rue, and though I think Rue might just about nab the top spot for her relatability factor, Kat is the girl I want to be or wish that I had been when I was at school. I mean, there’s definitely an argument to be made in that a lot of what she’s doing with her cam work could be seen as a means of validation (Sam Levinson has basically said everyone on the show has some kind of an unhealthy coping mechanism and I would guess due to the circumstances in which her cam girl career was borne and the fact she’s underage, this would be hers) but I do think in other ways we really see Kat reclaim her power and recognise herself for the smart, capable, gorgeous woman that she is. Honestly, the definition of divine feminine energy, and I would completely let Barbie Ferreira/basically Kat if she was also actually 23 dominate me.

Plus! Her! Style! Is! The! Bomb! Definitely the easiest character to base looks around because if I’m totally honest Kat’s energy is pretty much just what I want to emulate in every day life. 

It’s either pieces that are typically feminine, cutesy, and even slightly preppy at times drenched in everything grunge OR vice versa where you have something semi-gothic and then add a colourful, more playful touch in there that harks back to the beginning of the series before Kat had began to explore her identity and sexuality and dressed slightly more Forever 21.

I’d say, not yet with my whole chest, that on a good day the outfits I put together when making an effort aren’t too far off something Kat would wear, minus the more overtly BDSM touches; if wearing a ring choker in London is enough to get me a creepy comment from a gross middle aged shopkeeper (because I apparently forfeited my right not to be perved on when I decided to buy a bottle of Oasis summer fruits), then you can only imagine the kind of looks wearing a full-on harness would get in my conservative OAP dominated hometown. Not the most doable right now, especially considering the only time I get out is to work and to go for a run. The chafing I could deal with but the horrified glares of pensioners whose M&S prawn mayo sandwiches I’ve ruined by simply being in their eyesight not so much.

LOOK 1-

Corset-Urban Outfitters

LOOK 2-

Bodysuit-Depop

Skirt-Zara

Harness-Ebay

LOOK 3-

Co-ord-Depop

Lace-up Corset-Missguided

LOOK 4-

Dress-Vintage

LOOK 5-

Belt-Ebay

LOOK 6-

Coat-Topshop

Dress-Jaded London

LOOK 7-

Fishnet Top-Ebay

Skirt-Urban Outfitters

Maddy (Played by Alexa Demie)

Not gonna lie, I was kind of scared to do Maddy. I’m scared to be posting this, lol! Alexa Demie has played this character for a single season and she’s already one of the most iconic women to grace our screens in years. This is a huge undertaking and I don’t have the bank balance or the body confidence (lmao) to raid IAmGia. 

And this is where I want to stress: THESE ARE NOT OUTFIT RECREATIONS. THESE ARE INSPIRED BY. I HAVE ADDED ELEMENTS OF MY OWN STYLE INTO THEM. PLEASE DON’T DRAG ME. I KNOW, I’M NOT ALEXA DEMIE. I WOULD NEVER ASSUME TO BE ALEXA DEMIE. I’M NOT ABOUT TO TAKE THE LORD’S NAME IN VAIN LIKE THAT. So now we’ve got that out the way (wipes bead of sweat off forehead), let’s continue. 

Everything about Maddy Perez is extra. She has very much been established as a centre of attention character, and her outfits are a key part of that. They’re daring, they’re hyper-feminine, and they are always glamorous. We’re told that she competed in beauty pageants when she was younger and it’s clear that level of excess and coordination and glitz and all-round-boujeeness wormed its way into her DNA during that time. Even the “depression” outfit she wears to school following Nate becoming violent at the fair is costume-like, a 2019 Bratz doll Off-White street style collaboration.

Do you know how HARD I had to try to be HOT!? For these photos. Alexa Demie is one of those blessed women who doesn’t have to try at all, and that translates into the character completely. At any given moment, Maddy could add or remove one item or clothing and be let straight into the VIP section of a club, and that, honestly, is inspiring to us all in these dark times. 

One thing I tried to keep in mind is that she always looks polished and coordinated, I.E the kind of look I would prepare for a night out is something Maddy would wear on an average day. Co-ords and delicate prints seem to be more subtle wardrobe staples along with mesh and PVC and glitter and feathers and fur and basically anything that toes the line between expensive looking and tacky. Yes, I am aware we may toe different sides of that line but please let me stay delusional and believe that’s not the case for 5 minutes. Much appreciated xoxo

LOOK 1-

Bodysuit-Jaded London

LOOK 2-

Bralette-Depop

LOOK 3-

Co-ord Suit-Boohoo

Bodysuit-Boohoo

LOOK 4-

Dress-Motel Rocks

Shoes-Schuh

LOOK 5-

Bodysuit-Zaful

Trousers-Depop

Coat-Topshop

LOOK 6-

Dress-Zaful

Belt-Zaful

LOOK 7-

Top-Jaded London

Hair Clips-H&M

Rue (Played by Zendaya Coleman)

I have a complicated relationship with Rue as a character. When I started season 1 of Euphoria, I was like “Oh my god, this girl is the worst. Jesus, she’s so negative and draining and willingly self-destructive and-”

Then, oh my god is this what it’s like to live with me!?

I will say, to my own credit, that I don’t think I've ever been quite as hard to deal with as Rue (a lot less smashing stuff up and a lot more moping), and to HER credit, by the end of the season we come to realise she’s been through a fucking lot and so it makes sense, but wow. I don’t think I have ever seen a teen show handle drug abuse and mental illness in such a brutal way. It’s quite a talent to be able to show a character cause so much pain to those closest to them and yet do so through a sympathetic lens. And issues aside, whether it’s her occasional social awkwardness or her relationship with her family or watching bloody Love Island (still quite surreal to see Zendaya Coleman witnessing the Amy/Curtis drama unfold), Rue is just my favourite character to follow. 

Her style, though. AH. The thing is, I can hardly drag it, because it’s pretty much what I wear when I’m moping about the house-or just any time I can get away with it to be honest-to a T. I want to stay true to character, but that being said, creating a “Seth Rogen”-esque outfit that’s worth posting on here is difficult. So, with the same kind of artistic license that had me wearing berets whilst cosplaying Maddy Perez, here is the best I could do:

I know, I know, it’s probably too much colour and jewellery for Rue but this is as toned down as I could do and I tried to stick with the key silhouettes we see from her throughout the season; I mean, I can’t see her wearing leopard print but the structure of the coat in outfit 1 is very similar to the one seen in Shook Ones pt.II. I think the bottom line when it comes to her character is keeping things effortless and not overly-feminine; you want to mix street style, athleisure and your dad’s wardrobe favourites like your life depends on it. Plus messy hair and smudged makeup, both of which I’ve already got down according to the completely inappropriate number of customers who’ve asked if I'm tired at work so thanks for that guys, and glitter tears. Lots and lots of glitter tears.

OUTFIT 1-

Dungarees-Vintage

OUTFIT 2-

Trousers-Depop

Cardigan-Urban Outfitters

OUTFIT 5-

Beanie-Depop

OUTFIT 6-

Shirt-Boohoo Man

Sports Bra-TK Maxx

Trousers-Urban Outfitters

OUTFIT 7-

Shirt-Jaded London

Cassie (Played by Sydney Sweeney)

Style-wise, Cassie is a hard one. When putting outfits for her character together, I found myself gravitating towards a direction that’s probably a bit too bohemian for her character, under the guidance of loose terms like “girl-next-door”, “floaty”, “delicate”, you get the idea. She definitely feels the least fully-realised in terms of all the main girls and I think it’s fair to say she’s probably got a bit of self-discovery to do. Most of her storylines in the season are dictated by her relationships to other people: McKay, Maddy, Lexie, her parents and so on. 

Nevertheless, I tried to stick to the airier, more traditionally “pretty” pieces whilst still channelling the confidence and ease with which Cassie pulls them off. Sydney Sweeney has the most incredible figure and I feel like whilst the clothes the on-set stylists put her in flatter that and don’t hide anything, they’re still the focus. It doesn’t feel like there’s anything more inherently sexual about her character than any of the other main female characters despite the way the men within the narrative view her, and I think it’s a testament to the the wardrobe department that to me she still gives off big modern Disney princess energy and a certain innocence even whilst we hear her being continuously sexualised by her male peers. 

If anything, Cassie probably dresses the most like an actual teenage girl, and her style, whilst less distinctive than the other girls, still does a good job of capturing the youth and romanticism of her character. 

The colour palette of her wardrobe tends to be quite neutral, with a couple of pastels thrown in there, and if there are any details, they’re usually quite dainty. Similarly, Cassie is probably the least experimental when it comes to her makeup; we don’t really see her wearing the bold eyeshadows or liners or gems like the other girls at any point.

OUTFIT 1-

Bodysuit-Motel Rocks

Hair Clips-Bershka

OUTFIT 2-

Dress-Jaded London

OUTFIT 3-

Trousers-Urban Outfitters

OUTFIT 4-

Top-Urban Outfitters

Hairband-H&M

`OUTFIT 5-

Top-Urban Outfitters

Jeans-Zaful

Headband-Primark

OUTFIT 6-

Top-Urban Outfitters

OUTFIT 7-

Dress-Urban Outfitters

Hair Clips-Boohoo

SO, I guess that’s it for my Euphoria lookbook! As always, let me know what you think (nicely pls, my ego is fragile lol) and I’d love to hear your opinions on the show too! I really haven’t got this excited over a new TV show in ages and I just think that it does everything so excellently-from the writing to the cinematography to the soundtrack, you can tell each element is so carefully and purposefully constructed. It immerses you into the dramatic highs and lows of being a teenager in a way I haven’t seen since UK Skins and I never thought I’d watch a show which held a candle to that. 

In terms of what I’m doing next, I’ve got a very delayed fashion week masterpost in the works as well as something to fill the Met Gala shaped hole in our lives, which I hope to get up over the next couple of weeks. In the meantime, if you read to the end, THANK YOU! And I hope you’re staying safe and AT HOME where possible. I know this self-isolation feels never-ending and if I’m honest, it is having a hugely negative effect on my mental health, but NHS staff are doing their very best with the shitty recourses they have and whilst it seems that our government have thrown workers under the bus once again, we can all do our bit to combat that by slowing the spread of the virus. Also thank you to anybody who’s out working now in such a scary and uncertain time! I work at a grocery store and can say from experience that the best way to show this thanks is just through kindness and following employee’s instructions without giving them grief for it. Everyone’s scared right now and the best we can do is pull together and look out for each other, as difficult as that might seem at times.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble, and like I said, stay safe! Thanks once again if you read til the end or even if you’re just here for the photos. Appreciate it more than you know either way!

Lauren x

#euphoria #euphoria hbo #lookbook #styleinspo #styleinspiration #fashion #fashionblogger #fashionblogdaily #styling #`fashioninspo #tv series #aesthetic #zendaya #zendaya coleman #rue bennett #hunter schafer #jules euphoria #rue euphoria #barbie ferreira #kat euphoria #euphoria maddy #maddy perez #alexa demie #sydney sweeney #cassie euphoria

[random-mha-thoughts]

Smile (Shinsou x Reader)

Pairing: Shinsou x Reader

For anon (request)

Genre: Slight angst to fluff

Summary: Shinsou has a crush on someone in 1-B and works up the courage to ask them on a date.

Tags: @wwwwyamd​ @yuki-osaki​ @liviitehe​ @iamsoftsodonttoucheume-blog​ @bunnythepipsqueak​

Word count: 1,680

a/n: Ah, I missed writing for my tired purple boy. I just miss him in general, when I was searching for fanarts to post, I really was like “Damn I really miss Shinsou.”  How many of you agree?

So this is a request that some of you have seen already, but I don’t quite want to spoil anything for anyone who’s new, so I’ll post it at the end. ��I'm glad I was able to extend this longer than I was planning, because I really only had just the one scene from the request in mind vividly and the rest I wrote as I went along.

I have 3 more requests, but I'm gonna take a break from them so I can write some of my own original ideas before starting those up again, so look forward to that!  Enjoy this one!

(Also gender neutral pronouns they/them coming through!)

Buy me a coffee?

Shinsou first saw his crush at the beginning of the first semester.  He was taken by their quirk, a pretty flashy light quirk.  From what he overheard while they were telling their 1-B friend - he was totally not stalking, Shinsou doesn't stalk people - they can control the color of the light to do different things.

"Red light is a heat laser, green light heals, yellow warms things, blue cools things," they explained, the proudest smile on their face.  "I'd say it's pretty versatile.  And the more saturated the colors are, the more powerful they work!"

Shinsou was already intrigued by their quirk, but seeing their face light up was like icing on an already delicious cake.  The sparkle in their hazel eyes, adorably smaller form that's the right right height for him to kiss their head, a smile he already decided he wanted to protect.  If only he could go over there and ask them to tell him more about their quirk, but he was afraid that his intimidating figure would scare them away.  Discouraged, he walked back to his own class to mope.  Crushes and him never worked out in the past anyway; once they found out about his quirk, they would either run for the hills or try to abuse him.

However, he still longed to be with them.  He found himself naturally searching through a crowd to find them.  Each time, they would have the most brilliant smile on their face as they chatted with their friends.  It always put a smile on Shinsou's face that they were happy being in the company of good friends.  More and more, he found himself craving them to smile at something he said, to pat their head to greet them, just to hold them in his arms for a warm hug.  It became less of a want and more of a need, but he held himself back for his heart's sake.

After the Sports Festival came and went, Shinsou had a change of heart.  He's not a villain, he will only appear that way if he comes off like that.  He won't let his quirk define him, and he'll make a much more pleasant impression so they wouldn't think of him as dark.  He took the opportunity to work on himself as a person, gain more confidence in himself so he can put his best foot forward.  He's won't let himself lack in any department, he'll only show the best parts of himself and present himself to them in a new-and-improved form.

After training with Aizawa for a while - not to mention bulking up quite a bit to improve his chances - Shinsou decides on the right time to face them.  The purple haired boy practically shakes with anticipation the entire day.  During his last class, he rehearses the words he's wanted to say since he first saw them.

"You're such a bright, shining person. ��To me, you stand out among everyone else.  I'd like to get to know you better, would you mind going out with me?"

He second guesses every word and intonation, convinced that even the slightest error would throw the entire mood off and send the whole thing crashing down.  He won't let that happen.

The final bell rings and Shinsou's practically the first person to jump from him seat, throw his belongings haphazardly into his bag, and rush out the door of the school building.  Stationing himself at a nearby bench, he waits for them to come out, tapping his foot impatiently while still trying to look casual shoving his hands in his pockets.

Scanning the crowd of exiting students like a human radar, he searches for that smile he adores.  His heart practically beats out of his chest when he locks onto them, homing in on them without paying any mind to the surrounding students.  He collects himself and breathes, keeping in step behind them.  They're talking to a friend of their's, going on about hero training and homework.  He could listen to them talk indefinitely if he wanted, but then he wouldn't have the chance to confess his feelings.

Just you practiced big guy, go on.  Do it for that precious smile.  Shinsou gathers his wits and approaches just a bit closer.  Do I say "hey?'" "Hi?"  "Yo?"  Damn it, just do what's natural!  Calm down!  He bites the bullet.  "Hey."  He's proud that it sounds casual enough.

The apple of his eye turns around curiously, their smile just faltering slightly from their conversation with their friend.

Take it away big guy.  "Hey, I noticed you around.  I think you're-"

It's then he notices.  The way their eyes widen, the smile drops completely from their face, their skin turns pale, and Shinsou isn't sure why.  He's sure he didn't say anything wrong, he's barely said anything.  "Is-"

They let out a yelp and hide behind their friend, squeezing their eyes shut and quivering.  Beyond bewilderment, Shinsou's chest hurts as his world darkens.  The one person he wanted to smile at him and lighten his life plunged him into despairing blackness.  All his fear of people hating him for his quirk and being frightened of him resurfaced.  He feels naked, vulnerable, and ashamed all at once standing there frozen.

"You have to forgive them, it's not your fault."  The friend offers a sympathetic smile.

"Did I do something wrong?"  The entire ego he's spent the last few months popped in two seconds flat.

"No, it's not you, trust me."  The girl pats the frightened soul behind her on the had to comfort them.  "You see, they have a deathly fear of purple."

It almost sounds like some twisted joke, a prank the universe was playing on him for some unknown reason.  "Oh.  I see."  That's all Shinsou manages to say in response.  At least he's doing his best not to show how heartbroken he is.

"Sorry about that," the girl flashes another sheepish smile in half-comfort while his crush drags her away by the arm to escape  what anyone from the outside would think is a monster.

And the monster is him.

Shinsou is way past disgruntled once he gets home.  He doesn't know what to do now, what can he do now.  Giving up would be the easiest thing to do, especially with how dejected he feels.  The thing that hurts him the most is his sunshine who he never saw without their smile didn't smile when they were around him, all because of something else about him that he can't change.

He swiftly sits up from his laying position as an idea strikes him.  Or can he?

Two weeks later, Shinsou shows up to school so people barely recognize him.  He'd bought one of those hair coloring conditioners in black and washed his hair with it last night, and the brown colored contacts arrived shortly after he placed his order online.  Shinsou isn't the type of guy to give up that easily, and for someone he really wants to get to know, he'll make it work.  If he can temporarily change his appearance just to get to know them first, maybe he can be the one to help them get over their fear little by little.

Shinsou brushes away all the comments about his drastic appearance change; he's doing it for them and that's all that matters.  He decides this time to just approach them at lunchtime, no dramatic openers or well-timed moments; a friendly conversation is just as good an introduction as he can get now.

He approaches them while throwing away their lunch alone, tapping their shoulder.  "Hey."  He holds his breath when they turn around again, eyes scanning his figure for recognition.  "You don't know me, I'm in 1-C, we haven't spoken before."

A friendly grin spreads on their face.  "Oh, it's good to meet you!"

The boy inwardly cheers in victory.  "I'm Shinsou, your name is?"

"(Y/n)."

He rubs the back of his neck.  He wants to be honest, but doesn't know how they'll take it.  "I tried to talk to you a few weeks ago, but you were startled and ran off before I could say anything."

Their hazel eyes widen slightly before guilt morphs into their features.  "Oh, you're that guy.  I'm really sorry I did that to you, I must've made you feel awful."  They groan, a sound Shinsou admittedly finds cute, red color rushing to their cheeks, "And you even changed your hair color and everything, I'm really sorry!"

"Hey, it's okay."  Shinsou offers empathetically, "You shouldn't feel bad about things that you have no control over."  He knows that feeling all too well.  "I put the effort in because I want to get to know you better, it's not something you should feel bad about.  I think you're cool, from what I've seen.  We should hang out."

The boy can tell how taken back but grateful they are, a deep rooted appreciation shines from their eyes and more color saturating their cheeks.  "I'm not that special, but I think you're a cool guy for doing this for me."

Shinsou's heart can't help but feel captured once again by their vulnerability.  "It's what's on the inside that matters, I guess.  Can I join you for the rest of lunch?"

And finally, he's rewarded with what he's wanted to see:  His bright light shows him a beaming, toothy grin that crinkles up their eyes and puffs out their cheeks; it's a smile that's directed straight at him.  As his heart thumps wildly in his chest, the boy thinks he can die happily in this very moment.  "Of course!  Let's go sit."

It takes him a moment and a cough to clear his throat before he's back on Earth, nodding and following them back to their table.  As they walk next to him, he steals a few glances down, hoping that nothing else goes wrong.  Even if they do, he knows he'll have to find a way to work around them.  With that battery-charging smile, he knows he can figure out the solution to any problem.

So the full request from Anon was: “Hey you could take ALL the time at this but it wouldn't be sad if Shinsou's crush, the reader, is porphyrophobic. That means the reader is scared of the color purple. Have a good day!"

I hope I did it justice, it was originally gonna be just full angst, but it would only be drabble length, so I took it a step further.  I hope it made you guys feel all warm inside :3

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