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#mads lewis icons
cookiezitos · 1 year
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𓆩★𓆪!⋆𑇓🎳****ˀ̣ˀ̣˚⁎⁺˳ ᥒᩚɘ𝘸 𝕡O𝗼ຮ𝗍 ♡. 䵳꒱☆ ࣪.⭑𐬢 𐫱 𝗹𝗶᳞𝕜𝗲ᩥ ꩜𝚁 ℝᦕᩚ𝗯ᤲ𝙻☮︎𝙶 ☄︎ぬ ☕﹏͏ (⁎˃ᴗ˂⁎)˚★ᩝᐩ. ⊹າ૮ಫ਼ᰢ፝ 𝕔𝕣𝕖𝕕𝕚𝕥𝕤 𝙼𝙴 ^^ ⋆Ჰ़ᱹ🕸️ ⩇⩇:⩇⩇´-
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f-airytale · 2 years
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✵ ˚ : · like or reblog if u use/save. ˖⋆࿐໋₊ you can use this pictures to add filter/psd, but if u post, please tag me or use #moowny ♡
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taylorsz · 1 year
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✫꙳⸌🧿💭͏⌇⭒熙 ᘚᴥᩚ𝘄 Ꭾ𝗼᥍ᩚ𝘁
𐑙ikᴥᩚ ★` [ℛ.]ᴥᩚ𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠 𑄹🦋 私福:
!★ 。>﹏<。 𝗰𝗿𝗲ᩚ𝖽Ꭵ𝘁𝘀 mℯ。 ✰
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cosmindart · 8 months
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WavSEED Flavors
I may be biased but Ecume and Ripple are my fav VBs of his. I also love Tsunami but it's hard to have it sound right imo u_u
WavSEED Ecume (Soft and Gentle Japanese VCV)
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WavSEED Tide (Energetic and Jumpy Japanese VCV)
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WavSEED Tsunami (Raspy and Textured Japanese VCV)
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WavSEED Ripple (Clear and versatile English Arpasing)
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WavSEED Casscade (Semi-soft English VCCV)
Audio credits and his 6th voice (non-UTAU) can be found on his SC
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lovelylunas-world · 6 months
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love the fashion icon🔥
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fflowerbean · 2 years
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⋆ ࣪.✦ Ꮑ𝗘𝗪 𝗣Ꭷ𝗦𝗧 ꒷ ⋆ ָ࣪ ۰ 𝗖𝖱𝖤𝖣𝖨𝖳𝖲 𝗢N 𝗠𝖤 ⋆ ࣪ -
𝗅ⅈ𝗄𝗲 ᩁ𝗿 𝗋𝖾ິ-𝗯𝗅ͽ𝗀 𑁍 ָ࣪ ˖ 𓈒𓏸 ꒱ ᖇᗩᑎᗪOᗰ IᑕOᑎᔕ ‹𝟹
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iconpsds · 1 year
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Random Marvel Icons
like/reblog if using
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racingliners · 11 months
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Canadian GP 2007, a summary:
Two cars got disqualified for a pit lane infringement
Eight (8) drivers DNF'd either due to reliability or accidents
There were 4 safety car periods as a result
Meanwhile Lewis, who started from his first ever pole position, led all but 3 laps and won with a 4.3 second advantage over the rest of the field (at one point pre-safety car he had a 20 second lead)... at his sixth ever race
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gigicism · 2 years
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Credits: @affectionschnapp |
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kiarahparker · 2 years
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-Like or reblog if you save
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kingsgraveicons · 2 years
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MAD HATTER - ARE YOU ALICE?
character: mad hatter / lewis carroll series: are you alice? icon count: 377
taken from official manga scans only. cropped, cleaned and slightly edited.
like & reblog if you use! i would appreciate credit somewhere but i don’t mind either way~ you’re free to use these icons as you wish!
[ GOOGLE DRIVE LINK ]
preview:
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cookiezitos · 2 years
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𓆩★𓆪!⋆𑇓🎳****ˀ̣ˀ̣˚⁎⁺˳ ᥒᩚɘ𝘸 𝕡O𝗼ຮ𝗍 ♡. 䵳꒱☆ ࣪.⭑𐬢 𐫱 𝗹𝗶᳞𝕜𝗲ᩥ ꩜𝚁 ℝᦕᩚ𝗯ᤲ𝙻☮︎𝙶 ☄︎ぬ ☕﹏͏ (⁎˃ᴗ˂⁎)˚★ᩝᐩ. ⊹າ૮ಫ਼ᰢ፝ 𝕔𝕣𝕖𝕕𝕚𝕥𝕤 𝙼𝙴 ^^ ⋆Ჰ़ᱹ🕸️ ⩇⩇:⩇⩇´-
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f-airytale · 2 years
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✵ ˚ : · like or reblog if u use/save. ˖⋆࿐໋₊ you can use this pictures to add filter/psd, but if u post, please tag me or use #moowny ♡
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ham1lton · 4 days
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mind of mine.
pairings - lewis hamilton x singer!reader
faceclaim - beyoncé
warnings - 18+ content.
summary - lewis has just dropped his first full length album after winning his final championship. the internet goes wild trying to find his muse.
author’s note: thank u so much for the support so far and a reminder that requests for my 500 followers celebration are still open! 💕
— part one of my 500 followers celebration ♡ —
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liked by lewiswifey, landonorris and 493,789 others.
ham1ltonshaderoom: lewis hamilton’s first album under the pseudonym xnda, has finally been released. the explicit nature of the album has people wondering who the muse of the project could possibly be. what are we thinking ham1ltons?
user1: shakira. i mean c’mon. they were linked together recently. it makes sense!
user2: maybe he got back with nicole?
-> user4: yeah and maybe aliens are real 🙄
user87: it’s about me. stay mad y’all 😍😝
user7: it’s about nico.
-> user6: IJBOL 😭
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liked by yourusername, user272 and 1,837,738 others.
lewishamilton: thank you to everyone who sent me birthday wishes! really appreciated! i had a great day celebrating with family and friends. here’s to the big 4-0!
user2: not even talking about your album that just hit number one on the billboard charts ur so sick!!
user6: he’s so fine i’m frothing at the mouth.
user8: favourite song off the album??
-> lewishamilton: what album? 🤔😉
user7: WHO IS UR MUSE MR HAMILTON??! 🤨
-> lewishamilton: it’s sir 😉
-> user7: WHO IS UR MUSE SIR HAMILTON??! 🤨
-> user8: he’s silent when it comes to the REAL questions….
user13: him and those damn winky emojis….
yourusername: thanks for letting me celebrate with you! it was an amazing night 🫶🏽
*liked by lewishamilton*
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liked by ynswifey, yourbffsuser and 1,982,627 others.
yourusername: drunk all summer! 💕
ynswifey: the best vegan ice cream advert ever.
*liked by yourusername.*
user2: her eating vegan ice cream…. in a car that looks suspiciously like lewis’s…. using a lyric from one of his songs in her caption….. is this thee muse?
-> hater1: nah. she’s just clout chasing as usual.
-> ynfan1: not u saying THEE y/n l/n, who has the most grammy wins of all time, forever changed the way music was released and was cosigned by the greats such as prince, stevie wonder and tina turner… is clout chasing 😭
-> user6: like i’m just a casual fan and i know that statement was outrageous 😭
lewishamilton: told you edoardo’s was great.
-> yourusername: shouldn’t have doubted you 🫶🏽.
-> user7: the way this would be thee power couple…
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liked by yourusername, lewiswifey and 2,373,929 others.
lewishamilton: my forever muse <3
yourusername: love you forever 🫶🏽
-> lewishamilton: love you more 💕
landonorris: MY SWEET VIRGIN EYES!
-> user6: virgin yes. sweet?? idk abt that…
user8: user maxies on twitter must be overjoyed.
-> maxies: YALL SILENCED ME… BUT I PREVAILED ‼️
user5: vegan icons !!
user9: not him stealing my wife….
-> user12: not her stealing my husband…
-> user10: i’m having a ball in this bitch. we throuplin! 😍
lewishamiltonupdates: omg did we just become stepsiblings? y/nupdates
-> y/nupdates: i guess so! hi sis 😍🫶🏽
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taglist: @23victoria @luckyladycreator2 @mxdi0 @dangeroustacoalienbiscuit @casperlikej @nichmeddar @evie-119 @ironmaiden1313 @d3kstar @ravisinghs-wife @demvnsriot @ajvaix @raevyng @iloveyou3000morgan @namgification @formulaal (don’t see yourself or wanna be removed? send me an ask!)
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redbullgirly · 2 months
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HI BABRIE! HI KEN! [part 3, LH44 smau]
Lewis Hamilton x pregnant!reader [social media au]
Masterlist & Hi Barbie! Hi Ken! [part 1, LH44 smau] & Hi Barbie! Hi Ken! [part 2, LH 44 smau]
Summary: Lewis and his "real-life Barbie" girlfriend Y/N Y/L/N have a secret they keep from the fans. Though it's only matter of time before they announce the happy news... it's not like it can stay hidden forever anyways.
Warnings: Pregnancy. Slight hate and bodyshaming towards Y/N. If you're not in the right headspace, please don't read it!🫶
Author's Note: After quite some time, hello! I'm so sorry this took so long, but life has been so busy and hectic last month I simply didn't have time and energy to write this sooner. Though I'm very glad for everyone who waited for this part and I hope you'll like it. It's probably not the last one, I have few ideas for more parts. But I don't want to promise anything, we all know how long this part took XD.
lewishamilton posted on instagram
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liked by orlandobloom, f1, sebastianvettel, emmawatson and others
tagged: yourcharity
lewishamilton So proud to support charity program for the involvement of children from disadvantaged families in sports yourusername has been working on for a few years now. All money raised from the friendly basketball match goes to the fond of the charity. Let's change lives of these talented kids together! 💫🙏🏾
view all 18,349 comments
user1 basketball players should be grateful our king chose to be f1 driver 😌
user2 fr
yourusername together we can change the world for better!! 💫💕
liked by the author
user3 You make our lives better by existing Y/N😍😍
user4 I think this is too idealistic lol
user5 queen speaking facts and keeping us motivated
user6 LET HER COOK 🗣🗣🗣
user7 Sir Lewis Hamilton is Sir for a reason 👑
mercedesamgf1 🙏🤍
user8 even though he'll be driving for ferrari next year mercedes still supports him!!!
user9 and what did you think? that they'll ignore him or hate him suddenly? he still got a whole season w them 🤣 plus it's all marketing
user10 nah i'll just live in delusion that admin loves lewis & y/n🥰🥰🥰🥰
user11 I love how you use your platform to raise awareness
user12 omg he's so hot 🥵
user13 Wait, why is Lewis at Y/N's charity event instead of her? I usually support her, but this is just weird... why can't she stand up for her own thing?
user14 RIGHT?! idk why she didn't even bother showing there
user15 Honestly I think that Lewis going there brings more attention to it than just her going there, and it's a good thing people are noticing this organization. Though I don't understand why she didn't go there as well 🤷‍♀️
user16 guys stop wtf she could be sick or smth
user14 or she's just another attention seeker... never liked her tbh
user16 the only attention seeker here is u user14 get a life and stop hating 😘
user14 i'm not hating, i'm stating facts and unlike y/n i don't need a man to do shit for me lmfao
user17 Y'all are really getting mad over nothing xddd
user18 Amazing work! 👏 you make the difference, Lewis😍🖤💛
user19 the fact he has pink pants bc it's y/n's fav color and it's for a charity event she helped organize... i want a man like him 😩
user20 He's down bad for her!!!
user21 I mean... who wouldn't, just look at her🤭
user22 fr what i'd give to talk to y/n once
user23 Our fashion barbie iconic Queen 💖💖
user24 Lew giving the little boy a fist bump🥹
user25 he is going to be a great dad one day
user24 Oh definitely!🫶
user26 can't wait for dad lewis
user27 omggg imagine little him and y/n running around the paddock 😭😭
user26 they'll be sooo cute istg
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yourusername posted on instagram
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liked by lewishamilton, lilymhe, landonorris, isahernaez and 639,910 others
tagged: mercedesamgf1, lewishamilton and roscoelovescoco
yourusername japan grand prix w my favs 🇯🇵🤍
view all 4,249 comments
lewishamilton 🤍🤍
liked by the author
user1 awww i live for bf lewis
user2 YOU DESERVE SOMEONE BETTER
user3 and who would that be user2 ?? you? lmfao u wish🤣🤣
user4 the disrespect of writing these things under HIS COMMENT where he shows SUPPORT to HIS GIRLFRIEND...
user5 Lewis & Y/N 4ever 🫶
user6 omg look at roscoe baby so cute
user7 the teeth I can't🥹
user8 It's Roscoe's world and we're just living in it fr
alexandrasaintmleux so prettyyy 🙏🌺
liked by lewishamilton and roscoelovescoco
yourusername oh stoppp u are prettier 💓💐
user9 Girls supporting girls and wags supporting wags... that's what we like!!!!
user10 the fact lewis liked alex's comment w two accounts is the best thing that happened this week😭
user11 shut uppp I didn't even notice it before user10 😭 he's such a simp I love this 😭😭
user10 i knoooow😭
user12 finally you attended a grand prix this year!!!!
user13 😍😍😍😍😍
mercedesamgf1 It's always brighter with you in the paddock Barbie Y/N!💖
liked by the author, lewishamilton and carmenmmundt
yourusername next time i'm going all out w the pink 💖🫶
user14 the legend herselffff
user15 Admin is slaying and supporting Y/N 💁‍♀️
user16 MOTHER IS SERVING ONCE AGAIN🧎🏻‍♀️
roscoelovescoco Enjoying's dad's racing's w my's best's mum's ☺️🏎
yourusername enjoying dad racing w my best son 🥹💕
user17 not roscoe slowly learning y/n's slang and saying w instead of with🤭
user18 and the fact Lewis is the one really writing it... !!!!!
user19 They're such cute a family🥰
user20 mum and dad and son... I can't it's too adorable 🫠❤️‍🩹
user21 Literally the queen of f1 and gorgeousness keep slaying
user22 where is the usual barbie aesthetic?!😥
user23 fr I want pink dresses not blue trousers
user24 Guys she can wear whatever she wants
user23 yeah true but still... she already built that image so why not keep it wtf 🤷‍♀️
user25 Covering her fat stomach with the purse ewww 🤢🥴
user26 i wanna take u haters seriously... but I just can't xd
user27 if you have anger issues like me and don't like online trolls, pls stop scrolling people! there are so many dumb users from twitter in these comments!🙃
user28 I just don't get why they're hating on Y/N all of sudden... what did she ever do to them
user29 idk, probably bcs she wasn't active for a while (she was probably not feeling well or smth as she said in an interview few days back) and didn't attend any gp till japan this year (again she was probably sick so understandable)... plus lot of f1 "fans" are jealous bitches change my mind
user30 Internet always moves in waves and one time everybody loves u and then they hate u 😬
user31 yeah but it's so sad cause y/n is such a sweetheart🥺❤️
user32 I honestly wouldn't care about the haters if they didn't attack her body and the way she looks... that's down right embarrassing and disgusting
user33 AGREED user32
twitter & messages between Y/N and Lewis
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lewishamilton and yourusername posted on instagram
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liked by maxverstappen1, shawnmendes, t22felton, charles_leclerc and 27,925,028 others
lewishamilton It's hard to put into words how happy and excited we are. Can't wait to hold our baby in a few months and support my dearest love on every step of the way. Feeling blessed right now 🤍🪐
comments on this post have been limited
charles_leclerc Well, that's a shocking news I didn't know about this time...😂
charles_leclerc But big congratulations!❤️
yourusername yeah we needed to give u heart attack w smth too 😉💋
susie_wolff Congratulations Lewis and Y/N, you will be great parents! 💫🫶
yourusername thx susie, we have great role models in u and toto!!! ✨❤️‍🩹
lewishamilton 🫶🏾🫶🏾
kellypiquet what a great news!🥹
yourusername love u kelly 💕
sebastianvettel Many congratulations!
lewishamilton Thank you Seb!
yourusername will u be the fun uncle??? pls seb 🥹🙏
sebastianvettel If you'll make me their godfather....
yourusername done deal 🤝
lewishamilton I-... fair enough, done deal
fencer EXCUSE ME?!! THAT'S NOT FAIR
charles_leclerc Yeah what is this favorism?!
yourusername guys it's seb how could we say no 😌✨
charles_leclerc True... fair enough then I guess 🙂
fencer I still feel VERY offended
yourusername charles don't use that ironic emoji on me and fencer u can have the second child
lewishamilton Darling that sounds like you're sacrificing our second child while the first one isn't even born yet...
yourusername whoops 🫢🙈
sebastianvettel Do you realize this is not a private conversation?
yourusername actually u can set selected comments private seb 😁
charles_leclerc Wait seriously?!
lewishamilton No, she's just testing if he's old enough to believe her 🙄
yourusername you're sour bc u believed me the first time i tried it love ☺️🫶
sebastianvettel This is exactly why I didn't have Instagram sooner.
charles_lecerc We love you Seb!❤️
yourusername yeah we do love u our new godfather!!!!💖
mercedesamgf1 Congratulations from the whole team!🤩🤍
liked by the author
alexandrasaintmleux awww so happy for both of u!💞
yourusername hope you're prepared to be the fav auntie 🤭💋
alexandrasaintmleux anything for my little nephew or niece hamilton 🫡
scuderiaferrari The next world champion on the way?😍❤️
yourusername pls i hope they'll stay far away from racing 😭
scuderiaferrari Well... then we'll at least get another tifosi 😉
georgerussell68 Wishing all the best mate!
liked by the author
landonorris Wooohooo congrats!!!
landonorris Wait- do y'all realize you'll be parents now? Like real REAL parents of an actual child?!
yourusername yeah lando that's how it usually works when u get pregnant 😊
landonorris Yeah but... wait! The child needs to be McLaren fan!
yourusername your mission to get all hamiltons to be your fan is getting more complicated, isn't it? 😂🫢
landonorris Shhhh Y/N it's a secret mission 🤫
yourusername oh my bad sry
yourusername wait why do i know about it then???
landonorris Ehhh... miscalculation?
yourusername tf lando 😭
lewishamilton I'm starting to think this baby will be our second child and Lando is our first...
landonorris Wow so can I officially say Lewis Hamilton is my daddy now?😀
lewishamilton NO
yourusername lando don't you dare or istg
landonorris Byeee parents!! 🤗
f1 Let's go! 💖👶
francisca.cgomes babyyyyy 🤎🍂
pierregasly Why the leaves?
francisca.cgomes bcs it's an autumn babyyyyy
yourusername love u kika 💕
pierregasly Oh congrats by the way!🫶
yourusername thx pierre 💕
logansargeant RAAAAAHHH 🇺🇸🦅
logansargeant Sorry alex_albon took my phone 😒 I wanted to say congratulations!🤍
alex_albon 😇
yourusername lol
yourusername but thx sm logan, you're such a sweetheart! 🫶
lilymhe I swear it'll be the cutest baby ever
yourusername babe it'll totally will if u say so 💋
kevinmagnussen 🙌
hulkhulkenberg Welcome to the dad's club on the grid Lewis! 😉
liked by the author
oscarpiastri What a happy day, congratulations! 🧡
yourusername what's the orange heart doing here oscahh??? 🤨
oscarpiastri 💖
oscarpiastri Better now?
yourusername thx oscar sm for the congrats!🥰 also you should use my signature heart emoji more often 💖
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yourusername posted on instagram
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liked by haileybieber, martagarcialopez19, mercedesamgf1 and 834,981 others
tagged: lewishamilton and alexandrasaintmleux
yourusername enjoying the barbie life 💖💐
view all 2,013 comments
lewishamilton Beautiful, gorgeous and my Barbie!
yourusername awww my ken 💞🫶
user1 omg i love them sm
user2 I wanna have what they have
user3 the effect bf Lewis has on me should be studied 😩
user4 Just the fact he usually isn't active on ig and doesn't comment or anything... and she is the only exception😭🤭
user5 gorgeous literally so gorgeous
user6 The baby bump 🥹🥹
user7 and she looks so good with it too 🥹🥹
alexandrasaintmleux such good times hanging out with my fav barbie! 💋💖
yourusername the best times girly!!! 💕
user8 i live for this friendship
user9 Imagine these two next year in Ferrari garage together!😍
user10 literally the only good thing coming out of lewis leaving mercedes
user11 fr fr user10
user12 Are those flowers from Lewis???
roscoelovescoco Yeah's they'res from's dad's 🌻☺️
user13 OH MY GOD ROSCOE HIIII
user12 Can't believe Lewis Hamilton replied to my comment as his dog 😭
user13 lol user12 u really won life xd
user14 this is sooo cuteee 😻
user15 You and Alex look so good together! Hope you'll be friends forever!
kellypiquet where's the bag from? it's so pretty! 😍🤍
yourusername idk lew gave it to me for christmas last year... i'll ask and let u know!! 🤍🫶
kellypiquet 🫶
user16 The queens of the paddock right here 🙌
user17 still can't believe y/n & lewis are going to be parent in a few months
user18 RIGHT?! It's like a fever dream for me 😭
user19 Yeah i was excited for dad Lewis so long that now I can't believe it's finally happening 🤭❤️
user20 the best wag right here
user21 and soon the best mum!
user22 Ur STUNNING 😭💖
user23 Woman 💅
user24 proud to say i never hated on Y/N
user25 YES
user26 always knew she's the queen 👸💗
lewishamilton posted on instagram
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liked by naomischiff, gigihadid, susie_wolff, riabish and 2,452,906 others
tagged: yourusername
lewishamilton My beautiful Barbie. The love of my life. My partner for good times and bad times. Mother of my child. The only woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. Y/N Y/L/N. 💖💫
view all 31,274 comments
yourusername can't describe in words how much i love u lew!!! 💖💫
lewishamilton Love you too darling, so much!
user1 I can't 😭
user2 i wanna have what they have
user3 THE BEST COUPLE EVER
user4 if they ever break up love isn't real
user5 I'll tell my children they are the original Barbie & Ken
user6 my parents 🥰
user7 y'all don't understand how much i love them
user8 The best parents ever!!!!
roscoelovescoco Mums looking's gorgeous 🥹☀️
lewishamilton She in fact is.
yourusername my boys making me cry 🥹💓
roscoelovescoco Oh's no's mums don't cry's 🙁
yourusername don't worry baby it's happy tears 💞
user9 now I'm crying too... this is so sweet
user10 The reason they're my favs😍
user11 why is this so precious 😭😭
user12 so prettyyyy
kellypiquet Our Barbie looking like a goddess!💅🏻💝
liked by the author
yourusername thx kelly!!!💕
user13 she's fr glowing 😻
user14 Thought she can't get more beautiful than she was before but pregnancy proved me wrong
user15 MARRY HER
user16 we love bf lewis dedicating whole post to y/n 🤭🤭
voguemagazine 🤩📸
user17 ariana what are u doing here?!??!!
user18 Even Vogue is an Y/N fan and we love it
user19 y'all don't understand how bad i need her to be on the cover of vogue or some other magazine 😩
user20 OMG user19 SHE WOULD SLAY IT TOO HARD
user21 You should marry her now!!! 💍💍
liked by roscoelovescoco
user22 heyyy did someone else see lewis like it and then un-like it?!😧
user21 When the notification of roscoelovescoco liking my comment came up on my phone I nearly dropped it and screamed... like what? Excuse me sir!!! 😃
user23 LOL I love how he goes savage liking comments w his dog's account and then regrets it immediately xd
user24 guuuyyyssss what if it means we'll get proposal soon???☺️
user21 I wish!!!!
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THE END
Author's Note: Thank you for reading it to the end! I'll be very grateful for likes, comments, reblogs and every other sign of support. Also you can let me know if you think baby Hamilton will be a girl or boy 🤭. Have a great weekend! (Btw if someone wants to talk about their predictions for Saudi Arabian Grand Prix, they're welcomed bcs I don't have anyone to talk to about it XD)
Taglist: @namgification @hc-dutch @bloodyymaryyy @nat-lh-44 @cosmoscoffeee @daniellef89x @xoscar03 @67-angelofthelordme-67 @nathalielovesonedirection @raizelchrysanderoctavius @leclerc16s @carpediem241108 @onecojg (let me know if you want to be added or removed)
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myillicitaffair · 3 months
Text
Somethin’ Stupid | Charles Leclerc
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Summary: while being interviewed by his former lover, bottled up feelings find their way out.
Warnings: english not being my mother tongue, lots of angst, some swearing, arguments.
Notes: this is the first time i’m ever posting anything on here, i hope you enjoy it xx
1.5k words.
Letting myself fall into his abrasive webs was surprisingly easy. His green orbs, pervasive and curious, piercing my soul.
We had our ups and downs, unbridled passion slowly dying with each tear shed, magnetic attraction burning my lungs.
We found ourselves in a hiatus, which found a way of prolonging itself further than I would have liked to. Perhaps he managed to keep himself occupied with his busy schedule; trainings, special dietary requirements, public relations… as for me, I rather hold my silence.
My routine was overflowed with his voice, with how much I missed his touch on my lower back, guiding me through the crowds, our hands intertwined in a tacit promise.
However, life demanded to continue with apparent normality. Dinner parties surrounded by friends, rounds of drinks avoiding alcohol… The last thing I needed was to degrade myself into a melancholic drunkenness.
Was he also having a hard time with the abysmal coldness on the other side of the bed or the loneliness of not having anyone to dilute your sorrow over morning coffee with?
My days had fallen into a sort of routine; waking up while missing him, showering while missing him, having breakfast while missing him… I think you get how thing are.
This particular morning, Silverstone was extraordinarily cloudy, the mist engulfing my view from the hotel room. How fitting!
Running away from my surreptitious misfortunes, I head downstairs, soaking up the competitive environment prior to every race. Emboldened as an agitated swarm, my colleges and me descended on the designated circuit.
Tedious security controls accompanied the anticipated fun, a hammer already pounding into my head at the thought of seeing him face to face once more.
Walking towards the space where the press was condensed, I check the days schedule for the last time. I am lucky enough to maintain friendly interactions with most drivers, so as to achieve fluid interviews, keeping the audience on the edge of their seats.
The only reason I can find as to why that fateful name is written on my list of drivers to interview was that God and I clearly have some unresolved business… funny timing to make me pay the price though!
A lump gets stuck in my throat just by thinking about it, preventing regular air flow.
The countdown only stuns me, even though my duty doesn’t start until the last lap. The smell of burnt rubber, product of speeding wheels, fills my lungs while intoxicating my nostrils.
The continuous lights turn red with overwhelming precision as seconds go by, lightning up the faces hidden with baklavas and iconic helmets.
Unconsciously (or maybe not so much), my eyes crawl back to the speeding number “16” that, red and furious, slides around the circuit while attempting to memorize every bump and curve along the way.
Chasing the sequence with collective looks of astonishment, a collision comes rushing down, disabling Piastri and Norris by the arrogance that only clear disagreements gives you.
Without further issues, the race concludes with a podium conformed by both Red Bull Racing drivers, trailed by seven time world champion Lewis Hamilton.
As possessed by group madness, the journalists rush into the victors. Microphone in hand, cameras shadowing us, content hunger gushing from our pores.
Driven by a exacerbated sadness, I shift my focus from the winners to him, returning my gaze with clouded tear ducts, bottled up frustration visible in his features.
With a touch on my shoulder, I’m brought back to reality by a co-worker, who, with a subtle shift of her head signals my awaiting obligations.
I head towards my press conference, where I take a seat with my name on it, psyching myself up for what I’m sure will be the most awkward interview of my whole career.
Dressed in Ferrari clothing and constantly stalked by flashes, both pilots near the platform where I await. They settle into their designated spots, holding still until the cameraman says otherwise.
I steal one last glance at my premeditated questions and hide my true feelings behind a focused frown.
“Welcome dear viewers! We find ourselves in the eleventh race of the year, accompanied once more by our friends from Ferrari, Charles Leclerc and Carlos Sainz.”
I desperately try stabilizing the noticeable shake in my voice.
“Friend”- the Monegasque interrupts my monologue with a mocking remark.
The puzzled look his teammate throws in his direction doesn’t go unnoticed by the former, who insists on jointing his glistening irises with mine.
I decide to ignore the brief impasse in the speech, running away from his calculated sarcasm as I force the corners of my mouth into an attempted smile.
“so, Carlos… do you think driving behind two cars that crushed ruined your performance?”- I question, tripping over my words under Charles´s scrutiny.
“It´s safe to say it wasn’t an unexpected accident”- the Spaniard pronounces, doing his best at minimalizing the awkwardness- “for at least a couple of laps, Oscar and Lando were teasing each other, clearly trying to gain advantage over the other. They were lucky enough neither of them got hurt.”
I nod absent minded, vibrating due to the pounding against my ribcage.
“Charles, what can you tell us about your engineers’ strategy for this race?”- I swallow loudly, praying he can´t notice the mesmerizing effect he has on me.
“I guess you could say I’m not entirely satisfied with my team´s execution this season”- he confesses, minimizing the tingles of frustration running down his spine- “It would also be quite unfair dumping the blame on my team when my failure has more to do with me letting my emotions get the best of me.”
The tension is intercepted by a longing sigh I didn’t know I was withholding. The world seems to stop in its euphoria simply to hang in his every sentence.
“A broken heart is no joke… even less when you have to patiently wait for the piece they decide to donate you”- he reproaches without saying my name but making it perfectly clear that I was indeed the recipient of his raw address.
My anxious movements become motionless, forgetting the when and where, just to focus on the displeasure bubbling in my stomach.
“Guys, I really don´t think it’s appropriate to discuss this now”- intercepts the Madrilenian, proposing a ceasefire.
Mi hand goes up in the air before I can help it, shutting him up mercilessly.
“I wonder where I must´ve learned it…”- I reply, drowning in the unexpected harshness of my tone- “don´t forget who was the one to suggest this ´no strings attached´ bullshit between us.”
The drivers face shines with a scandalous blush in response to my bravado. Right here and there, I comprehend the dept of his anger, making its way through his collarbones, until it climbs up his cheeks.
“Just because I thought that’s what you wanted”- he spits out his resentful response.
From the corner of my vision, I perceive Carlos´s discomfort by reading his body language; the friction of wiping away the sweat stagnant on his hands, his shoulders pouring forward in a clumsy attempt of hiding from the cameras, his chair weakly shaking under the constant bouncing of his extremities.
Madness atrophies my reasoning, blinding me enough as to not have merci on his apprehension. I took this way too far, it would be useless to swallow my feelings.
“how in the world could you think our agreement benefitted me? Really, Charles, you couldn’t be any more stupid!”- I scream back, jumping up from my seat.
The swing of my feet gets ahead of my thoughts, allowing me to run away from the premature conflict before it blows up in the air.
Mi face heats up from the warmth of my own tears, that start rolling down my cheeks. With each involuntary spasm of my jaw, sobs escape my gasps for air. I don’t dare to slow down.
“Can you please just listen to me?”- a voice behind me shouts, trying to stand by my side.
I turn around to face his scrunched up brows.
“you have nothing else left to make up. You may convince somebody with the whole ´heartbreak boy´ façade you’ve got going on, but you have genuinely driven me mad”
“You and I both now that isn’t true! Have you ever wondered why I always seem to take a step back after every show of affection?”- he manages to freeze me to the core- “How come you never noticed my excessive efforts to stay away from you? I can’t even behave like a functional human being if I’m not feeling you, touching you, having you with me.”
In the middle of the paddock, with every pair of eyes set on us, events unfold the way I’ve been dreaming of, however I can´t even react.
“I know I´m not in a position to ask you anything, but please, strip me from the torment that uncertainty means… even if that means to completely destroy me”- he whispers with renewed fragility.
My smirk slowly becomes uncontrollable laughter, reducing me to unbridled chuckles. I shelter the vestiges of my giggling in between his arm, until It ceases in its intensity.
Without noticing, I search for his lips with my own, craving the heat they irradiate.
“I think you know perfectly well how my soul aches for you”- I manage to sneak in between kisses, stumbling across his smile, displayed in all its glory.
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