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tarjapearce · 6 hours

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Like Me (Pt. 3)

Art by Rendraws21 on X

WARNINGS: Emotional distress, Masturbation (M! receiving), a hint of angst, body injuries, no proofread, no use of Y/N, non graphic canon character's death, Character background.

Summary: As your bond with Miguel rises, your time runs short.

A/N: Thanks for the wait lovelies! Hope you like! <3. Reblogs and feedback much appreciated. Btw, Happy Pride Month! <3

"Mama!"

The young boy held on his mother's skirt as he watched the flames roar through the carcass of a sinking ship.

"Hold on tight, Miguel." Conchata mumbled as she tinkered with the escape boat's lever.

Both hers and Miguel's weight dropped the boat to the sea and Miguel fell, but quickly scrambled to his feet as Conchata held him close.

"We'll be fine okay?"

Conchata instructed to his seven year old boy to take a paddle and move it. Not long after, Tyler jumped to the water and hopped on the careening boat, gasping for air while he watched his expedition and boat, the labor of so many years, going to the depths of the raging and unknown sea.

Miguel watched with fear, as thunders roared, lighting up the sky, the waves crashed against the boat he was in, menacing to tip it away just enough for him to fall down into the cold and unforgiving waters.

Ash, burning metal and salt filled in his lungs as he was taken away from the wreckage. The land before them wasn't any prettier, but it was better than nothing.

Mexico and Alchemax could wait. After all, Tyler headed to his partner's homeland to start a new HQ in it's capital. He wasn't married, yet he already had a son.

A boy that looked more like his mother than anything, little like him and held onto her skirt, watching the destruction with all the fear his little heart could handle.

----

Miguel helped in whatever thing he could. Their makeshift home sure provided the shelter they needed from the weather's and jungle's ruthless laws, where only the strongest survived.

Tyler's brain and brawn had provided a solid structure in a giant tree. Conchata was in charge of the food and Miguel as well. But in truth it was only a decoy to keep him busy, and not thinking about the uncertainty that cornered his parents deeper into fate's cold arms.

The boy could only watch in curiosity as his mother's womb grew larger and larger by each day. And despite the constant arguments and yelling, Tyler made sure Miguel understood his place in the top chain. He always encouraged his boy to not fear his surroundings, to not cry if there wasn't any reason to do so and to be brave. The only streak of parenthood he showed.

But as a boy, Miguel couldn't understand much. It didn't make sense as to why Tyler insisted him in being strong, despite his young age. Miguel didn't know why Conchata cried at night, and repeated over and over, what would they do, and asked when the rescuers would come.

Cause they were sure the telegraph system worked perfectly before the ship sunk, and hoped with all their might the message had gone through.

But five months later, they still remained stuck, stranded and forsaken by society. Hopelessness begun nesting in everyone's hearts and soon, it paved the way for desperation and death.

Conchata had put Miguel in the sturdiest of wooden boxes and begged him to be quiet. A spotted beast had trespassed the security systems Tyler, had put around the uncovered entrances, meaning a bunch of stuff clattering and making noise to spook away anything that dared to enter.

They had kept the monkeys away, but how on earth were they supposed to withstand the natural predators without guns? Or anything that held an actual resistance against them?

There wasn't.

And Tyler was the first in falling before it's hungry maws despite the man being the tallest many had known. The thunderous roars outside were kind enough to drown Conchata's panicked and agonizing screams, leaving Miguel afraid yet safe in the box. The jungle had claimed itself as the temporary victor over them all.

The rest, was a nightmare Miguel sometimes wished to forget. But it was a good reminder of how different he was from his pack. His family.

A family that despite taking him in as a kid, and nurtured him, felt completely strange. So not his, not belonging and away.

He knew he looked different from the rest. His body wasn't completely covered in fur, despite some areas teeming with it, yet it wasn't enough for him, neither his father. A silver back gorilla, the pack's chief.

Even if he imitated their walk, their manners, to the point of having his knuckles slowly rearranging into a holding posture, he wouldn't be one of them. And sometimes his back hurt as he tried to keep that position for too long. He wasn't made like them. His sense of belonging truly betrayed him some days.

But you...

You and the men that came along were like him. And how marveled he was by the variety of his own kind. Tall, lanky, strong and burly, round and short, a bit like him but smaller. And then you.

Not only you came with a lot of things and trinkets that piqued his curiosity, but the way you spoke, the child like wonder that appeared into your face as you discovered new things, made his brain tingle. His heart raced whenever you explained him something, to the point of getting infected with your excitement too.

He didn't know what he liked to see and admire the most. Your face, your body, your voice, your hair. But your hands were definitely his favorite.

Miguel could spend hours and hours watching you move that piece of wood that left a trace on the white sheets, even if his absence made his mother worried. And whenever you laughed, his heart was all stupid and pumping excitedly in his chest. You didn't hoot in excitement like he did, and when he learned how to laugh from you, the sound of his voice had you fascinated.

Deep, rich and oh so gorgeous to ignore, specially when he tripped over his own words, by trying to read a new sentence in the current book you had picked, cause it earned him a giggle out of you. He spent his days holed up with you in the makeshift projector room, learning new things and expanding his vocabulary, only to disappear before the sun sunk down.

You taught him about things his brain had long forgotten, as it was too busy to survive all those years ago on his own. The different images slid through, changing within the clicking sound of your fingers in the weird shaped control.

The planets, a man, a member of his family, many other animals, a woman, plants, food; tools, different scenarios mankind had created, structures that stood as majestic in the picture as they did in real life, everything that the tiny piece of technology could hold, was shown to him.

Each of the images were devoured with child like wonder and thrill by his eyes. He grunted happily whenever he saw things he was familiar with, and hissed at those that somehow still rendered a threat to his wellbeing, even if they couldn't harm him.

Much to your amazement, he was a fast learner. He devoured whatever you threw at him in matter of hours. And if an image called his attention, he'd show it to you, and wait for you to explain how it worked or what was it.

Much to your embarrassment, he had shown you a picture of a woman's anatomy, and pointed at your breast. It made you recall the little moment back up in the tree after you almost drowned.

That little tease had been enough to spark something rusty in your brain. Something that had been postponed over and over due to your research, to the point off simply evading you naturally from now on.

"I am a woman. You, a man. We are different, but still the same species."

"Different? You and me?" He shook his head with a borderline cute frown if it wasn't for him looking concerned, "No. You. Me," He pointed between you both, "The Same."

He took your face in his calloused hands and once again pressed his thumbs against your lips, to pry then open. Rough pads of him caressed your wet muscle and explored gently your mouth and your cheeks burned.

No matter how many times you explained, he always kept making sure you'd understand that you were like him. What surprised you the most was the utter gentleness he moved whenever his solid and well worked body was around you. Miguel moved in his tiptoes and knuckles and followed you to the simplest of task, asking what you were doing and how it worked. Some things came easier to understand than others, but his intelligence always surprised you.

Specially when he imitated to perfection the sounds of the animals you had drawn in the sketchbook. Birds and animals alike.

Peter sometimes joined you and the teaching, whenever he wasn't under Kraven's command to help him look for rare minerals. Just to make sure you were okay. Although Miguel wasn't harmful, that didn't mean he couldn't be a threat. Not when Peter recalled you telling him how the man before you killed a Jaguar with his bare hands.

And Miguel's attitude towards him, was mostly curious. You and Peter were the only ones Miguel truly approached.

Peter taught him his good share of things, like shaving. He helped Miguel to give him a more clean look on his face as the savage refused to have scissors or anything sharp around his body, but his facial hair made him uncomfortable. It scratched and the urge or tear them away only increased.

Peter was terrified to see the dangerous methods Miguel used to groom himself. Meaning a sharp stone and aloe slime smeared on his face. Undoubtedly, the geologist didn't want to learn the details of Miguel's routine. And so far, his new friend seemed comfortable enough with his razor around his neck.

In fact, as soon as his stubble grew, he dragged Peter from whatever task he was doing and asked him to trim it down for him.

"I believe you can learn how to do it on your own, pal." Peter grumbled as Miguel sniffed the shaving cream, then join you once again.

Sometimes you were concerned by the sudden scars that appeared in his body, like if Miguel had fought something. And refused to tell you. Instead he'd take your hands and stare your way as if memorizing every inch of your factions.

"Are you ok, Miguel?"

He'd grunt softly and look at his hands holding yours. You only broke the contact to clean his wounds.

----

"It's been almost two weeks since we arrived and we've seen nothing but animals that we can see at a fucking zoo."

Kraven grumbled after takin a long swallow of vodka and looked your way.

"It's been a week since your savage friend shows up, why he won't take us with his pack?!"

"I don't know! He refuses to-"

"Are you even teaching him useful things? We need to see gorillas, Dalhberg. Gorillas. Not how a fucking savage has the hots for you."

Your eyes rolled and a sigh came out.

"Look, he's refusing for a reason. Every time he shows up there is a new wound on him."

"Then find out what is it! Use the stupid attachment he has for you, in your favor! Do something! We're running out of time."

And that pulled a scowl on your face. How dared he even suggesting something as dishonest and disgusting as that? You knew Miguel was hiding something and his refusal for you to see the gorillas kept rooting deeper, to the point of making him upset. So you stopped asking, and helped to ease his troubled mind with other things and tasks instead.

"I try my best in doing my job, Sergei." You bit back and Peter stood next to you, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.

"Fucking try harder then! The other ship is picking us up in nine days. And we still have nothing. You have one more chance to get that brute to take us to see the fucking gorillas."

Kraven went to the entrance, "One more chance." He warned before leaving you and Peter on your own.

"Son of a bitch." you kicked a beer bottle out of your way and Peter sighed, annoyed.

"Im not liking where this is going. I don't like his insistence in the gorillas and the soil."

"You think I do?! I'm worried about Miguel. He seems off and snappier these days. And there is always a new cut or scratch on him."

"Remember he's grown up here, Dally. He knows his way around things. He ain't stupid. Probably is fighting for territory against a threat? Or cut in his way here. He's a big man, prone to accidents, mind you.

"Big or not, I still worry. Something is going on with him. And if honest? I'm getting uncomfortable with Sergei."

"Oh really?" Peter deadpanned and you slapped his arm.

"I mean it, you ass. Like... One thing is competing against Octavius and Osborn, but he's acting like a fucking collector. Have you seen how many new furs he has dried out in the sun lately?"

Peter rubbed his neck, trying to ease the tension building up.

"We don't even know if those creatures are in extinction or if they're a protected species, Parker. I know we signed a contract, but this is getting out of hand."

"Dally" He sighed and placed his hand on your shoulders, like every damn time he was about to lecture you and he'd end up being right.

"You know what happens to those people that mess with Kravinoff or any man with power enough to pay an expedition like this, right?"

You nodded and looked away while he rubbed some sense into you.

"I know you care about him and the animals here. But you know we can't do much about it. You know how Kraven is."

"Still, Peter, I-"

"I know you care. And that is what has brought you so far, but we gotta be careful. He nearly kills you the other day!"

He reasoned and you sat on a nearby stool, completely at lost on how to proceed. As usual and again, Peter was right.

"If it wasn't for Miguel, I'd be burying you by now."

"Then is only fair to protect him and his family, Pete. I'm well aware of the dangers this field implies, I just... can't let something happens to him." Your hands clasped and unclasped anxiously, "Like... Can you imagine the excitement he must feel to finally find people, humans like him, just to find out they only want his family for a zoo?"

Peter nodded and held your hands gently, trying to ease the inevitable heartbreak.

"I know. And I know you've done your best in keeping him distracted. But you can't shelter him forever from life, Dally."

"Is not that! I don't wanna feel like I'm betraying him, Pete."

Peter's heart sunk at your words. Sometimes your field required a cold heart, something yours was everything but.

"He's been nothing but kind to me, he has saved my life twice! And taken me to see things I only dreamed of. The least I can do is to warn him. Even if that means to not see him again."

"Don't say that. Now you're insulting him and the animals. You think he ain't smart enough to not know what is going on? Or the animals not strong enough?"

You sniffed and Peter offered you his handkerchief.

"He'll be fine. Same for the gorillas. I might not be a scientist, but I wouldn't be fool enough to mess with those beasts. Kraven thinks he can do it. Let him have that. Men like him don't have a good ending."

He hugged your trembling form, and rubbed your back gently. Like he always did.

Little did you know a pair of beady red eyes watched you both with a frown from a nearby thicket.

Miguel didn't show up for the next two days.

-----

Where is he?

Miguel's absence increased your worry tenfold, the first day you thought none of it, that maybe he had business or whatever he did, to attend. It sure raised more questions than answers. Where did he stay during the nights? Was he sleeping well? Had something happened?

Before your mind could take a sour you breathed and hopped over a tree trunk on the floor to get to the camp.

Once more you'd return with empty hands and the guard Sergei had assigned you seemed more than happy to forsake you in the jungle and return to the base.

But in truth, any other moment away would give you some peace and ease the nerves that Kraven's crew made sure to break and upset. Specially after you found them all gathered in the projector room, jeering and cheering at nothing else but a porn clip.

Some even had the guts to suggest you to get something, cause your pissy and irritable attitude haf started to get upsetting. And others offered their services for such thing as you turned the thing off.

Kraven could be an ass and many other things, but to your surprise a little decency remained in him. He warned his crew about consequences of anyone trying something with you.

You knew he only kept you alive for the sake of getting to Miguel.

With a sigh, you entered the camp, ignored the roll of eyes many gave you, and the withering glare from the leader and went straight to your tent.

Peter was busy with another motor the crew had gotten from the shore, he tinkered with the pieces, too busy to even acknowledge your presence.

Night rolled in, you had dinner and soon, you went to your tent to prepare another day of search, even if you had to do it on your own. Those two days of pure silence and no clues about Miguel's whereabouts weighted more than your backpack full of rare minerals.

You changed into your sleeping clothes, and soon headed for the projector room to update your finding log and journals.

To your surprise, the projector light was on. A frown came up your face once again, as you made your way towards the sturdy tent. Upon entering you saw none, but the screen turned on, and the lost signal title bouncing on the screen.

God, I'll tell Kraven to leave this thing off and-

A whimper.

Your eyes blinked at the sound as another came, it wasn't a regular one but the kind you heard the man doing in that clip.

You took a bottle, ready to strike the pervert that had remained behind to ease himself and use your tools for disgusting purposes. Only to find the ever familiar figure of Miguel, sprawled on the floor, behind the wooden boxes that acted as occasional seats.

"M-Miguel?"

He heaved and growled quietly, his muscles tensed when he heard you. Would you be mad at him for disappearing? He had seen your worried face, not really wanting to cause even more distraught in you, but the sensations in his body had been too good to be left alone.

A couple of books were sprawled on the floor, a little mess on the shelves as if someone had been looking for the projector's control. Which, laid at Miguel's feet, nearly broke in two.

The white dim light illuminated Miguel's silhouette and your eyes raked over his feet, to inspect if he wasn't injured then crept up his knees, past his thighs and

Oh...

Your cheeks grew impossibly flushed as your scrutinizing gaze stopped at Miguel's hips, more like what laid between them.

One of his strong, tan hands was wrapped on the base, with such viciousness it made you gulp with worry, as the other squeezed with the same force his broad tip. And then, you stopped at his face.

Angry, flustered, awash with need and frustration, mouth curled in a scowl at his new failure. Another whimper echoed, a pained one.

Your mind tried to keep itself focused on what might trouble him, and not the cock between his hands.

"Stop. You're..." You gulped as you pried his hands away from himself and he hissed, way too receptive and sensitive to your touch, "You're hurting yourself."

He craned his head enough to watch you as you kneeled besides him.

The sensations he provoked had made his mind a puddle and his whole frame a shivering and sensitive mess, too soon within such a short amount of time.

"H-Help" He pleaded, trying to reach for you.

Never in your life had you gotten such proposal, much less when he took your hand and placed it around his base and a shaky moan escaped his mouth.

Soft, velvety skin trembled under your hesitating fingers. Your heart thumped almost deafening in your ribcage as his hands enveloped yours while you held him.

"Please" He choked and pulled your head against his, his eyes darkening with something you knew all too well but was too busy to acknowledge. His solid and broad chest rising with erratic breaths as his cock twitched in your hands.

And it clicked in your mind. He was trying to see that video, meaning he had been around the whole time but was cautious to not approach since you were away.

But the video had demanded his attention, specially the way the man held and toyed with himself before plowing into the woman. His body was into a sudden need of that same sort of contact, the woman's cries and pleas had made his body react in such way that got him confused and panicky, specially when his groin grew uncomfortably tighter in his loincloth.

Miguel had tried to seek relief for himself, but only had managed to squeeze himself a bit too tight and set ablaze that fire that menaced to consume him whole. And now that you were here, you would teach him how to do it properly. Like the rest of things you've taught him.

He stroked harshly and your skin shuddered when he moaned into the crook of your neck.

"Miguel" You called and he breathed while looking into your eyes, "Breathe."

You inhaled and he followed, then exhaled and he closed his eyes as his mouth parted to let a shaky breath.

Oh god...

Despite the baffling still clinging to your brain, the pedagogic side of you thrived as you taught him how to properly please himself. It was fascinating to you.

"L-Lets do it slowly, okay?"

He grunted and tried to urge you to do it faster, but your free hand caressed his cheek, snapping his attention to you and the sudden touch.

"Slow. You'll hurt yourself."

A trembling hand held you by the nape as his eyes focused on your hand, stroking with gentleness up and down his warmth.

"See? Softly" You mumbled and he tightened his grip on your hand, a quiet beg for you to not let go.

"Video-" He choked and looked at the projected screen, still blank.

You shook your head softly and sat properly beside him, your other hand palmed and massaged both his hardened balls before squeezing gently, earning a delicious growl that made your skin crawl.

"You don't need that, focus on my voice, ok?"

He nodded and placed your forehead against his, panting and groaning softly, completely hypnotized by the way your hands performed your usual magic on him.

"Yes" He breathed when one of your hands circled on his veiny and thick base and the other one toyed with his tip.

His hips jerked as soon as you started to pump him in a slow but firm pace. Thrusting them into your hand, gaining as much friction as possible. Increasing that searing heat within.

"Does it feels good?" You focused on his tip, using his oozing precum as a lube to move your hand a bit faster, and his mouth gaped. His eyes nearly rolled back when you squeezed him in the way his hand had miserably failed.

"Good. Yes. Goo-" He choked when you palmed his balls again, and then wrapped him with both hands. Resuming your strokes in the same tempo you had marked before.

He whimpered your name in such a way none had ever done before, sending a sudden shudder straight to your clit.

The wet and soft sloshes of his skin against yours ignited that primal need engraved in his brain. The hand on your nape tightened on your hair, as if fearing you'd go away and stop teaching and giving him this gift.

The sharpness of his canines grazed on the joint of your neck and head, muffling his groans and obscene, choked whimpers as you kept pumping and stroking with right amount of pressure to make it heavenly. Way more delicious and arousing than any rush of adrenaline he experienced regularly.

Never occurred to him his body could produce such sensations, or someone else could provoke them. He had put his trusting the right place. You were teaching him the way he loved to learn. Practical, with hands on.

Without warning, he pulled you to crash his lips on yours, making his best to emulate the kissing in the video. And it was your turn to moan.

Be it the years spent on your own with nothing but your hands and rare hookups, or the sudden realization of having such a wonderful piece of man yearning for your touch, for your lips for you, made your knees weak and your insides shuddered.

The kiss turned even more urgent as soon as you increased the speed of your pumps, making him a twitching, trembling and panting mess, that mumbled your name over and over. His hand secured you by your waist next to him, refusing to even think to let you go.

You were grateful the projector room was away from the main base, and close to the river, ostracising all noise from the camp.

"I'm-" He whimpered and with a low, skin crawling growl, his jaw tightened as he came.

Sticky and hot spurts of himself scurried abundantly on the side of his cock, rolling to the back of your palm, spilling himself while his hips tensed and his head, like his eyes rolled back.

You had to breath to take in the sight before you. Erotism in it's utmost pureness.

The sweat clung to him, like a thin glistening layer, his chest rose up and down erratically, heaving all the remaining and clinging lust out of his system, some strands stuck on his flushed face, awash with relief. Every muscle rippled at the tempo of his breathings, contracting and releasing with enjoyment.

He pulled your hand towards his face and licked a dribble of himself and then kissed you. His taste was unexpectedly sweet. But his lips made it even sweeter.

When he broke it, his hand caressed your cheek, and delivered more of those initial licks and pecks that had your knees trembling. He panted and rubbed his nose against yours, as if grateful for the first pleasurable experience ever had. All his pent up tension was gone.

However his sudden question threw you off guard.

"You... with Peter too?"

Your head tilted in confusion and a brow quirked. He sighed, and stared deeply into your bewildered eyes as he rephrased what he meant as best as he could.

"This." He gestured, "With Peter."

Have you done this with Peter too?

You had to blink and laugh softly, finally understanding.

"No. Never."

"But, Peter hugs. I saw." He pressed with a moue on his lips.

Oh...

Was he jealous?

"Peter is family to me."

That eased his frown and grunted.

"I was worried. You... and family. Not safe."

"I... know."

You watched him with surprise. He had heard it all.

"I'm so sorry. I... I wanted to protect you but-"

His fingers shushed you, and that's when his fresh wounds on his forearm came into view. Those were definitely bites on his arm, but he seemed unbothered by it.

All those bites and scratches were earned as he fought other creatures that entered a territory where new mothers were in. Jaguars, panthers, even other monkeys.

"Are you ok?"

He nodded and his lips twitched into a sad smile.

"You leave soon?"

"I... Yeah. Nine days." You brought the count in your fingers.

He nodded with a frown, "But you, come back?" His hands gathered your face in his hands and watched you with pleading eyes.

Stay.

"I can't." The idea of leaving him alone again was gut wrenching. Cause you knew you couldn't survive like he did.

Your words earned a hitch of his breath.

"What... what if you come with me?"

"You and me, leave?"

You nodded enthusiastically.

"Hmm! I can teach you all those places you saw, there are so many people out there that would love to know you."

"Me and you, together?"

You nodded with a soft flush on your cheeks as you smeared antiseptic on him. "Yes. You and I, together."

"You and I, come back later?"

The excitement in your eyes died, and he pursed his lips.

"Oh... No. Miguel, if we leave, we... don't come back. Ever."

He seemed confused for a minute but just stood.

"I see."

"Wait, Miguel!"

Without much word and covering up, he left.

"I don't wanna go..."

Leaving you in the projector room alone, heart clenching in a turmoil. You didn't want to leave him. But you had to.

------

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#t writes✨#miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara x you #atsv miguel #tarzan! miguel #tarzan! AU

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daisyblog · 2 days

Text

Wedding Bells

Our Story Masterlist Summary: Harry and YN finally say “I do!”,

It was the night before the big day. The day that YN and Harry finally say “I do!”. Wanting to keep the ceremony very intimate, only inviting close family and friends, the couple decide they would get married in a small wedding venue that was tucked away in the countryside of Yorkshire.

Harry had been whisked away from his soon to be bride, by the men but Louis stayed by his sister’s side for the evening. The two siblings were sat together on the balcony of YN’s room, silence surrounded them as they enjoyed a moment a quiet after a busy day.

Louis eyed up his sister as she sat in her “bride” robe, her now large bump poking out, her hand that held her engagement ring stroking back and forth where the little Styles grew. “Any nerves Tiny?”.

She glanced over at Louis, who was still sipping on his bottle of beer from earlier on in the evening. “No…nothing…I’m actually excited”.

“I suppose that’s when you know you’ve found true love!”. He thought out loud, knowing his sister was lucky to find that type of love when she was young.

“Good thing we didn’t listen to you ey?”. YN tried to break the serious of the conversation, earning a smirk from Louis.

“I was so annoyed…and now look we’re sat here on the night before your wedding!”. Louis reached over to hold her hand in comfort.

“You’re the best brother…you know that don’t you?”. YN could feel the tears rise from within her chest, the moment making her emotional.

“Of fookin’ course!”. Louis sassily pretended to flip his hair over his shoulder. “Now less about me and let’s get you into bed before I have the girls pestering me about you needing your sleep”.

---

YN couldn’t believe how her evening had gone from calm and quiet, to the next morning being chaotic. Her room was filled with every person possible, her makeup artist and hairstylist were being put to work. Louis had left once he could see the chaos about to start, but not before whispering “it’s all about you today Tiny” in her ear and placing a brotherly kiss on her cheek.

After what felt like hours, YN stood in front her bridal party that included all his sisters and breaking tradition, Louis too. “I’ve never seen such a beautiful bride before!”. Anne was the first to speak, as she wrapped her arm around Louis who was gulping down his tears.

YN wore a flattering white grown, that showed of her bump elegantly as it flowed down her body and left a small trail behind her. Her face was covered in light make up, giving her a natural look to her pregnancy glow. Her hair was placed in a low up do with a slight curl framing her face.

“You look absolutely breathtaking!” Lottie complimented as she dabbed her eye with a tissue, careful not to smudge her own makeup.

“I hope Harry’s got some tissues ready…’cause he’s definitely going to need some!”. Louis caused the whole room to laugh as he all held their tissues ready.

A knock at the door disturbed them as they all looked at Mark who wore a smoke. “It’s time for a wedding!”.

YN couldn’t help but feel giddy knowing that within the next hour she would get to call Harry her husband and she would be Mrs Styles, no longer sharing a last name with her siblings. The thought caused an internal meltdown in her head.

“Tiny? What’s wrong?”. Louis was the last person to leave the room before YN. He hurried to her side.

“I won’t have the same last name as you or the girls anymore”. YN’s concern was real, her bottom lip quivering slightly.

Louis couldn’t get but let out a little chuckle. “YN…your last name may change today…but you’ll always be a Tomlinson in there.” He gestured to her heart.

“How do you always know what to say?”. She asked as she pulled herself together again, not wanting to walk down the aisle with tear marks.

“Stop procrastinating…you have a man waiting to marry you!”. Louis playfully moved YN closer to the door.

---

The sound of ‘Ocean Eyes’ by Billie Eilish sang through the room, as YN and her father stood at the double doors. YN couldn’t help but smile as she watched Daisy walk down the aisle first with Doris and Ernest, both holding her hand as they smiled at everyone the walked passed.

Next, Phoebe walked carefully behind, Olive in her arms wearing a beautiful ivory flower girl dress as she sat in her mother’s arms. The newborn caused the other guests to ‘awe’ at her cuteness.

Lottie and Lucky trailed behind the others, but the little toddler caused some laughter as he tried to run down the aisle.

Louis and Freddie were the last ones to walk down the aisle before YN. The bond they shared really showed as they both wore the same smile and how Freddie gave Harry a fist pump before he found his chair.

“Are you ready darling?”. YN heard her father as he held open his arm for her. His smile matching hers as he got ready to give his first daughter away.

“I think I’ve been ready for the last twelve years”. YN marched his smile as she spoke true words. She looped her arm through his and they both took their first steps down the aisle.

As she takes her steps down the aisle, she couldn’t help but notice all the familiar faces that had come to celebrate her and Harry today. The people she will always be grateful for.

She spotted Sarah, Mitch and the other members of the love band all sat in a row together. But causing her to smile and let out a giggle was Pauli mouthing the words “saucy” to her. These were the group of people who she got to call family for the last few years.

Next, she spotted Harry’s uncle, auntie and cousins, all smiling brightly back at her as they officially welcome her to be a part of their family.

The next three faces that all say together was a pinch me moment for YN. There sat Niall, Liam and Zayn, all of them amused by her jaw dropping expression that she quickly covered up. The three boys that took her on like a sister since she was sixteen, the ones who she caused chaos with on tour, the three people who always showed up for her.

Before setting eyes on her grandparents and siblings, three empty seats reserved for special people caught her eye and it was in that moment that reality hit her, her Mum wouldn’t see her marry the love of her life. But catching Anne’s eye brought her some comfort as she mouthed “I love you” to her as she wiped her tears.

As they reached the bottom of the aisle, she was face to face with Harry who was wiping away his tears at the sight of his bride. “You look so beautiful…you literally took my breath away”. He whispered as Mark placed YN’s hand in his. Louis took his place next to YN whilst Gemma remained by Harry’s side.

“Friends and family, we have come here today at the invitation of Harry and YN to share in the joy of their wedding”.

Harry and YN couldn’t help but get lost in each others eyes as the registrar spoke. They both felt like young teenagers again, as they let out childish smiles and giggles.

---

“The bride and groom have written their own vows and wish to read them…YN..you may begin”. The registrar instructed as he looked between the couple.

“Harry…I could stand here all day and list everything I love about you. But I think everyone in this room has already heard it a million times. From the moment I met you, I knew deep down you were the one. You taught me how to love myself, you showed me love on a different level, you have been there by my side through all the good and bad times and I will always love you for that. Harry you are my best friend, my soulmate and I can’t wait to call you my husband and the father to our children. This is our forever and always”.

YN took a deep breath and smiled up at Harry, as he used his knuckle to wipe his eye before the tear escaped. “I love you”.

“Harry…you may now read your vows”. The man instructed.

“YN…whilst you come across as sassy, strong willed and a bit of a potty mouth, what others don’t always see is your loving, caring and kindhearted side. I’ve been lucky to see that side of you for the last twelve years and I can’t wait to see it for the rest of my life. You’re the most beautiful, strong and determined woman I’ve ever met and I love you for it. You’re my best friend, my partner in crime and as much as I can’t wait to call you my wife, I’m even more excited for us to be Mum and Dad. I love you forever and always!”.

The guests let out a cheer as the couple finished their vows, causing the pair to go giddy with a coy smiles.

“Do you Harry Edward Styles take YN Olivia Tomlinson be your lawfully wedded wife, to live together in matrimony, to love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, to have and to hold, from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?”.

“I do!”. Harry gave a boy-ish smile to his bride, one that showed his dimples as he placed the wedding band on her finger above her engagement ring.

“Do you YN Olivia Tomlinson take Harry Edward Styles be your lawfully wedded husband, to live together in matrimony, to love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, to have and to hold, from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?”.

Without hesitation, a large grin shinning through that caused her eyes to sparkle, YN spoke the words Harry had longed to hear. “I do!”. She carefully pushed the band along his finger.

They both beamed at eachother as they waited for the famous next line.

“By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife…Harry you may now kiss your bride!”.

Having been deprived of each others touch and presence since the night before, Harry wasted no time reaching for her cheek to bring their lips together. YN could feel them both smile against the others lips as they shared their first kiss as husband and wife. Their guests cheered and clapped as they watched on in happiness.

---

The reception area was decorated in fairy lights and Polaroid photos of YN and Harry were hung around the room, dating back from when they first met.

Harry and YN were sat on the top table, with Louis and her grandparents next to YN and Gemma, Anne and Des next to Harry. The newlyweds were in their own bubble as they huddled together, whispering in each others ears and stealing quick kisses.

With the guest all full from their three course meal and itching to get on the dance floor, Gemma rose from her chair as she was given a microphone to speak.

“Hello everyone…I’m Gemma and as the Best Woman I’d like to say a few words”. She glanced at Harry, before speaking again. “Harry…my baby brother who followed me around is married. For everyone who knows my brother, will know how amazing he is…he’s selfless, warm hearted and one of the kindest people you’ll ever meet. When I say I’m proud of you Harry, it doesn’t justify how proud I am…watching you grow from a little boy to a grown man has been an absolute pleasure. I love you baby brother!”. The guests all clapped as Gemma took a breath. “I will be honest…growing up I always believed there would be no one good enough for Harry…but the day I found out that YN had won my brother over, is the day I changed my mind. I’ve never met two people who are meant for each other, and as much as I would like to say welcome to the family YN…I think it’s safe to say you spend more time at my Mum’s than I do”. The joke caused a sea of laughter from the guests but also YN as she did spend a lot of time at Anne’s. “In seriousness…I wish you all the happiness as your family grows and I love you both!”.

Everyone lifts their drinks in a cheers and in agreement of Gemma’s words. Louis takes this as his cue to stand.

“‘Elle everyone…I’m Louis and YN has decided to be different and instead of having a Maid of Honour…she’s got me a Maid of Man…I know it’s exactly what I was thinking!”. Louis made the rook laugh at his attempt of a joke, only causing YN to playfully tap his arm. “For those who know us Tomlinson, you’ll know we’re a large family…I was an only child until YN was born. The day my first baby sister was born, was the day I met my best friend for life…from kids to adults we are inseparable and I wouldn’t have it any other way. YN…you’re a married woman with a baby on the way but you’ll always be my little sister and I love you more than you know”. YN wiped away her tears as Harry gently rubbed his hand along her back in comfort. “Harry…you’re my best friend and when I first learnt that you and YN were a thing…I was skeptical and went into big brother mode…but with some wild old words from Grandad Len here…I saw sense…and over the last twelve years I’ve watched your love for my sister grow…you have cared and supported her and our family though some dark times and I will always be grateful to you…but most importantly you’re the only person who could put up with YN’s pregnancy hormones because I’ve never seen something change so quickly!”. Louis’ sense of humour took a hit with the guest as they all shared a giggle, as Harry nodded in agreement. “But I wish you all the best in your long married life and your future together…YN…Harry…we love you!”.

“To YN and Harry!”.

---

Between her pregnancy bladder and large wedding gown, YN had spent the last twenty minutes with the help from Lottie in the ladies bathroom. But as she exited she was pleasantly surprised to see all the guest mingling.

She stood for a few moments of searching the room, she spotted her husband in the corner chatting away. YN made a bee line for him, not wanting to be away from him a minute longer than she needed to be.

YN slid up to Harry’s side, and naturally his arm draped around her waist as he pulled her closer to him. The couple shared a quick peck as they reunited.

“Well someone fookin’ pinch me but I swear I see One Direction standing in front of me”. YN couldn’t help but tease as the five boys all stood together.

“You never change do you babe? Still our number one fan”. Zayn laughed as his eyes scrunched slightly and his tongue poked through his teeth.

“I’m loyal Zayn…can’t say the same for you lot…eighteen months you said”. The boys knew YN was teasing but it didn’t stop them all from giving each other a side eye. “So is my wedding present a performance?”.

When the boys looked between each other but remained silent, YN broke the silence. “Well it was a try…I’ll have to get this little peanut to nag you when she’s here…you’re not going to say no to your daughter or niece are you?”.

“YN…it’s your wedding day…you’re not surely still going to talk about One Direction?”. Liam laughed as he noticed Harry give him a look of not to say a word.

“Exactly Liam…it’s my wedding day and I want One Direction to perform”. YN said with sass as she flicked her hip out and placed her hand on it.

“God I love you aye….don't ever change!”. Niall only encouraged YN’s behaviour, Harry could only assume it was because their friendship was so strong.

”On that note…I’m going to find Lottie again because this little bubba is sitting on me bladder again”. YN hurried off after placing another peck on Harry’s lips.

“And just think lad….you’ll have a mini YN running around soon!”. Louis playfully tapped Harry on the shoulder, causing the other boys to laugh at Harry’s wide eyes.

---

“Ladies and gentlemen…please welcome Mr and Mrs Styles to the dance floor for their first dance!”.

The newlyweds walked hand in hand to the dance floor, smiles beaming at eachother as wrapped his arms around her waist and YN’s reached up to wrapped around his neck.

When she gets that come-get-me look in her eyes

Well, it kinda scares me

The way that she drives me wild

And she drives me wild

They gently danced across the floor, both too busy wrapped up in each other to notice their family and friends watching on in awe, some videoing the special moment whilst others stood their and lived in the moment.

Beautiful, crazy

She can't help but amaze me

The way that she dances

Ain't afraid to take chances

And wears her heart on her sleeve

Yeah, she's crazy

But her crazy's beautiful to me

As Harry had his head resting near YN’s ear, he sang the words to her causing a shy smile to land her lips. After waiting twelve years, they were finally a married couple with their baby girl on the way and life couldn’t be better.

“I love you Mr Styles!”.

“I love you Mrs Styles!”.

Tag List:

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plussizefantasia · 16 hours

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Broken Together

BlackCat!reader x Bucky Barnes

Chapter 5/6 : <Prev/ Next>

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: Talks of violence, suggestive language

A/N: okay so I fully planned to do a smut scene but then I chickened out because I've never written one before so.... sorry. ALSO: keep your eyes peeled for the kickoff post of my 300-follower (holy shit) celebration along with chapter 3 of the Fluttering Hearts series, both will be coming out before the end of the day!

You nod a solitary nod and reach for the door handle.

“I love you.”

That stops you cold in your tracks.

“Don’t say that.”

“That’s not really the reaction I was looking for if I’m honest.”

“Well what did you want me to say James?”

“I don’t know, really anything but don’t say that. I tell you how I’m feeling and you know that I’m not good with that feeling shit and your reaction is to tell me not to say it?”

“Jesus Bucky, I can’t ever tell with you! Two minutes ago you were giving me the silent treatment and being all pissy and now you tell me you love me? What am I supposed to do with that?!”

“I- just… I spent the whole night worrying about you, you were back there in that room all alone with those bastards and I couldn’t get to you. I just had to listen through comms and hope and pray to whatever God there is that you come out the other side.”

“Bucky, I can take care of myself.”

“I know that, really I do. I have never ever doubted that you could handle yourself but that doesn’t make it any less terrifying when you go somewhere I can’t reach you. It’s bad enough I had to watch you hanging off that asshole all night. Watching him touch you in the way I’d wanted to all night.” Bucky’s hands tighten around the wheel. You watch as he swallows something caught in his throat.“I watched and stood there like an idiot while he held you close and made you laugh and did everything I’d been dreaming about. I couldn’t look away though, as much as I wanted to becuase even a glimpse of your smile is enough to make all that shit worth it. But then I hear you being threatened, I watch you walk away with the target and not even five minutes later he pulls a gun on you? It took everyhting in me not to run to you, not to burst in and protect you with all I have.”

“I don’t need your protection-”

“I know that! Goddamn it I know that! I know that your amazing, that’s the only thing that kept me from running in there, knowing how good you are. How good my girl is at her job, she doesn’t need me, but I really fucking wish she did.”

“You’re girl? I’m not your girl James I- you don’t even like me?”

“What?! Why the hell do you think I don’t like you?”

You scoff, “You give me shit all the time. You call me Fury’s pet and you never fail to let everyone know just how much you don’t trust me.”

“I trust you, I trust you with my whole life, I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

“You have a funny fuckign way of showing it.” You cross your arms over your chest, this whole night scratch that day has been a total fucking emotional rollercoaster, you almost died and now here you are. The man who you love to hate and hate to love is spouting all kinds of heartfult shit and you’re reeling, I mean… what are you supposed to say to that?!

Bucky takes your silence harshly, he tries to fill the space with as many words as he can. He knows that he’s not good at this shit. He isn’t James Barnes the ladies man from the forties anymore, he’s too broken for that. But he can tell your broken too, and maybe you can be broken together?

“When I say that I love you, I mean it. I mean that I can’t stop thinking about you, when youre not next to me it’s like i can’t breathe. When I hear you laugh or see you smile my whole world lights up. God even when you’re yelling at me an throwing pillows and shit I can’t help but feel like a goddamn wire. I don’t know when I realized it was love, if it was months ago or minutes ago but I’m not taking it back. I don’t think I can ever take it back.” Bucky ends his rant with several big breaths. The whole time he was talking, his eyes never left the road, his hands never left the wheel.

“James, I- God fuck. I’m not a good person. I don’t deserve good things. Anyone i’ve ever been close to has told me the same shit, i’m too broken to be good to anyone.”

“Yeah. You’re broken. You’re a smart-mouth little piece of shit who doesn’t lok after herself and can’t follow a sleep schedule for the life of her and I love you.” He finally looks into your eyes.

“I don’t need a perfect girl, I don’t want a perfect girl, someone to hang off my arm and laugh at my jokes and just stand there looking pretty? I’ve had that and it gets boring really fucking fast. But you? I could spend the rest of my life trying to figure you out and I really really want to.”

“I’m not easy, and I don’t think I ever will be.”

“I like a challenge.”

“Well,-”

“Jesus, Stop trying to talk me out of this, I want you. I want you and all the messy shit that come’s with that.”

“I’m running out of reasons anyway.”

“What does that mean… for us I guess?”

“It means that if you can get us back to the hotel within the next five minutes I’m gonna let you see the pretty little number I have on underneath this dress.”

Bucky slammed on the gas.

_____

It took the two of you four minutes to get to the hotel, the entire time people were honking at your car weaving through traffic. You’re really fucking surprised that the two of you didn’t get pulled over.

Four minutes is a lot of time though, especially when your nervous as hell and have a penchant for self-sabatage. You don’t know how this is going to go. This is brand new territory for you and honestly your shitting bricks right now with how nervous you are.

It’s not like you’ve never been with anyone, but Bucky is the first guy that you’ll genuinely care what happens when it’s over. Most of the guys you’ve been with before have been the type to only want something physical from you, not that you were complaining, you had needs and they were willing to fuffil them. They just didn’t want to date you, and never once had any of them used the L-word.

You’re still reeling from Bucky’s confession. You have no idea how long he’s felt this way but the more you think about it the more it makes sense. For as long as you’ve known the man he’s been difficult to read, he build walls as easily as you do and he uses them to block out 99.99% of people in his life.

Now that you’re really thinking about it you’re astonished at how much he told you tonight. You guess having a gun pulled on the person you care about really makes you want to tell them everything you’d been holding back.

You’d be lying if you thought that there wasn’t something you also wanted to tell Bucky when you heard the safety click off. You don’t know if love is the right word, not yet but you do know that he means just about the world to you. The only person in your life who really seems to see you and understand what you’re thinking. You’ve always liked working with Barnes, it was easy, but now you think there might be something else to it.

Bucky pulls into a parking spot right at the front of the building and within seconds he’s by your door opening it and offering you a hand to step out.

“Eager?”

“Very.”

He pulls you out of the car but doesn’t step back, he crowds you in every sense of the word. You see and smell and think nothing but him. This close you notice the little things that you hadn’t before, like the little piece of hair that keeps falling onto his forehead, escaping the gel holding the rest of his locks back. Or the way small scars he has, one above his eyebrow, a line to the right of his lip, a little triangle under his eyes. You could spend hours studying him, he doesn’t give you that long tough,

“Can I kiss you?” He asks, moving closer to your mouth. You don’t answer, just push yourself into him. You practically melt at the little groan that falls past his lips.

His hands fall to your hips almost instintually, the grab ahold of you firmly not willing to let you move even an inch from his hold.

His mouth moves passionalty against yours, he takes his time really trying to get to feel you, to taste you. The pulls away only enough to get air into his lungs, resting his forehead agaisnt yours. God he could kiss you for a lifetime and even a bit longer than that.

“That was…” you start.

“Yeah.” The corners of his lips turn up into a genuine smile. You love his smile even if you don’t get to see it that often.

“James?”

“Yeah Kitty?” He giggles… this grown ass man giggles into you.

“Take me upstairs, these people don’t need a show.” You nod your head at the gathering of people outside, trying and failing to make it look like they weren’t just staring.

“Gladly.”

#james bucky buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #plus size reader #plus size!reader #fanfic #x reader #marvel fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #requests wanted #requests open #blackcat!reader #bucky fanfic #bucky x reader #bucky barnes imagine

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yannaryartside · 9 hours

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I am tired of Sydney being a “knight in shining armor” for these immature men

The trailer of s3 made me reflect on a big problem with the show for me so far. The use of Sydney on the plot overall and in the character arcs of men. This is a rant, if you happen to be on the side of the fandom that think these men are perfect and Syd is valued as their support, feel free to scroll.

Part 1: the woman

Sydney Adamu is insecure on her leader/social skills and her creative habilities. That, and her kindness, is what makes the audience root for her. She is releatable but most important she is real, she has taken it impulse by impulse, creating on the fly ways to succeed in a industry not very welcoming to people with her personality (or that look like her). All of that makes sense in a story of an underdog.

But yet, the show has normalized at this point how much shit she takes from a group of really emotionally immature people. And how much they expect her to figure it out answers to the problems that they themselves cause.

Thinking about it like an animal getting into a new pack without the capacity to defend herself from any attack. The shitshow she tolerated in s1 has never been properly addressed and it seems like the worst storm is yet to come in s3. She fixed the logistics of the beef and implemented a hierarchy. Things that Carmy was incapable of doing due to his story with the staff and his own mental turmoil. In s2, she was the only professional chef actively making decisions and efforts in the future of the restaurant. Carmy even reprimanded her for not making the decisions he was supposed to do. And she reminded him “you wanted the final say, this is on you)

Syd is not helpless in any way, but she has applied kindness and fairness most of the time to this point, and I wonder if this time that is gonna cut it. I am mostly tired to get her back to that scenario again. If anything, the part that got me the most excited of Richie’s redemption is how she could actually rely on him. And then it came the trailer.

Part 2: the men

The part that got my blood boiling in the trailer is the response “Show me a functional one” from Richie and Carmy.

We are in season 3, and with all the growth and all those balls, these men seem to expect her to fix an issue, wich core is actually their own emotional immaturity. I am sick of it. “Mother, maid, therapist”🎶

She must deal with Carmy’s recklessness and the fight between him and Richie. A very green new staff and a unqualified old staff mostly. All of that creates the dysfunctionality in question, and I wonder where her character will go to resolve it. The restaurant had a shaky base (particularly on front house staff and line cooks) and now Carmy is getting on everyone’s nerves. Putting fire to an already unstable chemical.

Part 3: Heroine’s Journey

It would take a pro to resolve all of this shit, and the people involved (and responsible for the problem) turn to this young, inexperienced woman for guidance and answers because the only person in the kitchen with actual industry experience is trapped in his own destroying tendencies.

That is not only the underdog story that is human vs forces of nature, another common plot structure. Forces of nature incarnated in unstable men and our hero is a woman. That is so fucked up and yet so real. That is the value I give to this scenario.

I really don't think that, besides Tina and Nat, there is a single member if that kitchen aware of how much Syd was alone last season picking Carmy’s slack. And even they were barely able to help her. Everybody else was to happy for Carmy loosing his virginity apparently. All this scenario could very well repeat itself this season on how much they are insisting on Claire and Carmy getting back together.

I know the show is about leaving toxic cycles and the people who can help you get better. Sydney is supposed to be made from a different matter than the Bearzattos because otherwise, the toxicity will continue. I just wish she could coldly let them know how much of a pest they can be sometimes. And not be treated as unfair because she left her “role” in creating a new system. Anger is boundarie setting emotion and it can be very constructive, and expressed without the chaos of the Bearzattos. She did this in s1 and if done again I think this time the general audience (except the racist/misogynistic obviously) will understand that this tough love is necessary as well.

Let's not normalize (in this show) women taking shit to be good women and a reward for seeing the potential of men. It is not like society is not doing that for us already.

Sydney is not a punching bag, and she knows it, she definitely will stand her ground this season, wich can be very encouraging to young woman entering a workforce that is not designed to support them. I think she will go to Ember to work closely with Chef Terry (Olivia Coleman) to get knowledge of how women can shape this toxic places. It will be her version of forks. The toxicity may escalate to a turning point for her. She tolerated (and transformed) s1 and s2, we know what is in her heart. The point will definitely come, because this is the time for evolving or dying, for everyone.

But again, I need these men (besides you, Marcus, you are going to be her rock) to start taking responsibility for the shit they are fucking up. That would be nice. I am sure there will be moments of it since this growth is literally the show's theme. I am just kind of tired of the “Mother, maid, therapist🎶” undertone of it all. It could be applied to Nat and Tina as well.

#sydney you are my champion #we are rooting for you #sydney adamu meta #the bear meta #sydcarmy #sydney adamu #carmy berzatto #the bear #carmen berzatto #the bear fx #carmy x sydney #carmy the bear #sydney x carmy

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youremyheaven · 2 days

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Frequently Asked Questions:

I get some version of these pretty much every day so I thought I'd make an FAQ:

What is my dominant planet/How do I find it?

If you knew enough about astrology and your birth chart, you would know which planet influenced you the most. Most people acutely feel a combination of at least 2-3 planetary influences most strongly. In reality, every single planet and nakshatra in our chart influences us but we probably aren't self-aware enough/knowledgeable about astrology enough to see how it impacts us. Each planet correlates to a different area of your life. Since Sun represents the soul/outer self and Moon represents the mind/emotions, its safe to say these 2 placements impact every area of life but when it comes to relationships/creativity/beauty, you channel your Venus whether you're aware of it or not and same goes for all other planets. Whenever you do something of a creative bent, you tap into your Ketu, your education is affected by your Mercury and Jupiter, so on and so forth.

If you're very new to vedic astrology or if you haven't been able to figure out your dominant planets, just let it be!! This is not a puzzle to be solved, there is no way for you or somebody else to mechanically calculate your "dominant" planet. I don't know you, I don't know what you look like, what your personality is like, so there is absolutely no way for me to tell what influence comes through most acutely.

Also, the concept of "dominance" itself is pretty much a made up one (thanks Claire Nakti) so literally, just chill out!!! Read about your placements, and learn more about astrology instead of trying to claim planets. You're influenced by your whole chart, its that simple. That's it.

2. Which website should I use?

You can use astro seek.com or the Cosmic Insights app or the Jagannatha Hora app. On astro seek, you have to adjust to "whole sign" instead of Placidus though. On the others, that's the default setting, I think.

3. Which ayanamsa should I use?

I stick to Lahiri

4. I have xyz nak/planet/house, am I doomed/ugly/forever alone/unlucky?

Astrology helps us understand our strengths and weaknesses, there is no placement that comes as a death sentence of some sort. I feel like most people don't understand that your birth chart is supposed to make you self-aware of your natural inclinations, tendencies, patterns etc so that you can work with them/make necessary changes etc. Your chart is NOT set in stone. Human behaviour is far too complex to be narrowed down to a birth chart. It shows your INCLINATIONS, which means that if you're self aware, you can make necessary adjustments to work on unhealthy habits/tendencies.

Astrology is not "this is who you are, you suck",, it's a tool for self-growth.

If you have difficult placements, you need to pay more attention to them and work on those areas. Why on earth would you just accept that everything is fcked and its game over for you bc of what the stars said??? Sorry to be rude but that's dumb af?? You were not put on this earth to be miserable until the day you die, EVERYBODY has difficult placements, if you remain ignorant of it/avoid it, you will continue to live in ignorance and suffer from the same things you always have and not know why.

Astrology makes it possible for you to understand yourself and evolve.

5. I'm not Hindu, can I still worship Gods/Goddesses/chant mantras?

Every single religion is made up. God never said only brown people from the Indian subcontinent can worship me. But that said, do your research and actually be invested in it. I feel like some people approach this in a Buzzfeed-y "Which Disney Princess Am I?😍" type of way which is 🤦🏻‍♀️but religion isn't something to be sampled, if ykwim?

You don't have to attain Guru levels of religious insight/expertise either. Most practicing Hindus probably know very little about their religion and truth be told, Hinduism is soooo vast, expansive, varied and eclectic that people practice it in thousands of different ways across the country with their own unique rituals/customs, so everybody who practices the religion makes it their own, in some ways?

Build an altar if you can, dedicate a certain time of the day and space of your room/house to just prayer. By making something sacred, we feel its divinity permeate our lives. Rituals are a major part of every religion because acting with intention helps us feel like our lives have meaning.

Always chant after you've showered, sit facing east, look at a picture of your deity or visualise them and chant quietly. Most people use prayer beads but you can also just count them on your fingers. Its often said that when you chant, others should not be able to hear you. If you use prayer beads, keep them covered in a box after use. You've energetically charged them with your chanting and its not good to leave them exposed because they'll pick up on other vibrations from the surroundings. Do not chant after you've just eaten!!

Picking a deity is all about intuition. If you don't feel called to anybody, just chill out and keep studying their mythology. You can always chant 'Om'.

I used to chant Buddhist mantras like 'Om mani padme hum' and 'nam myoho renge kyo' and they're not directed to any deity so if you're worried about that, you can always chant non-deity mantras as well.

The purpose of chanting mantras is to keep your mind calm and still. Even if you repeat a certain affirmation in English several hundred times, it has the same effect.

#faq #astrology notes #sidereal astrology #vedic astro notes #nakshatras #astrology #astroblr #vedic astrology #astro observations #astro notes #astrology observations

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laura1633 · 3 days

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If Max wins in Singapore for the first time then we are going to get nothing .. cause Charles doesn't care about max the way max does about him

Jokes aside I wouldn't expect Max to celebrate a Singapore win in anywhere near the same way as Charles celebrated in Monaco for obvious reasons.

I personally don't see Max and Charles' friendship as one sided though. I think they both have different personalities and may express themselves differently but I think there is a mutual respect and friendship there.

This is all conjecture because I don't know either of them personally but I get the sense that it took Charles a little longer to get to a place of friendship with Max. That is just going by how Charles has described their relationship in the past.

I do see views online that Lestappen is more one sided - but I think Charles shows his friendship and affection for Max in different ways.

Charles gives Max one of the most important things of all and that is his time. He will give Max his full attention when Max is talking animatedly about things and he laughs at his jokes (even when they aren't that funny.) Sometimes now when I see the way Charles looks at Max it makes me laugh - he looks like he's really fascinated by him, like he is still trying to work him out and is learning all these new things about him. Of course we also have interviews where they both speak highly of each other.

If Max had never won a championship before and won his first one in 2024 and was really emotional then I could envisage Charles and Max sharing a proper hug which is not something we saw in 2021. I think their relationship has come a long way since then.

Whether they both 'care' about each other in the same way I suppose we will never know because I don't want to make assumptions about them irl, I am just happy to see how far they have come.

This is just my opinion of course.

#laura1633 asks

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whyawonderwhatudo · 1 day

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Okay so I HAVE to talk about the newest ep of Helluva boss, Full Moon.

Spoilers for anyone who hasn't seen it yet.

I really loved the episode but damn did that last scene hurt! Going into the ep I kinda had the idea that the whole episode would feature around stolas and blitzø, so you can imagine my surprise when we saw the Cherubs!

Ngl, they always seemed holier than thou (pun intended) but its so interesting to me to see how 2 of the cherubs would justify their 'sins' and want for revenge, when angels are all supposed to be about love and forgiveness. Kinda hope Colin has some kind of redemption, the other 2 cherubs treated him awfully.

Loved how badass Luna was this episode tho! Was so worried they'd actually attack Blitzø only for Luna and M&M's to beat them back to the human world.

Also we love Fizz and Blitz' friendship!!

Okay but that whole conversation between Blitzø and Stolas was heartbreaking. It was so clear how apprehensive Stolas was while waiting, twiddling his thumbs and sitting on the bed, and he's been prepping himself for this talk all day.

And so has Blitzø, but he's come with the expectation of their transaction, and added with the addition of what Luna had said about him getting bored and no longer wanting to continue, of course he's scared when Stolas asks for the book back.

Stolas was so determined to make sure Blitzø understood how he felt, no longer wanting to make Blitzø feel obligated to sleep with him to get something out of it when he said 'Please don't say it like that.' Stolas probably felt this was the right choice more than ever when Blitzø said he'd do anything. And then look how sweet stolas looked when he was giving him the crystal.

This made me so sad because Stolas was so clear, in his feelings and intentions. Even with the crystal, Blitzø asked whether he wasn't good enough anymore or not, showing he does care. He was looking forward to his night with stolas, having preparing for it and doing a whole shopping trip. They both care, but because Blitzø could never believe Stolas actually loved him, he thought Stolas was joking.

It was so hard to watch when Blitzø started to mess around, thinking it was some kind of role play saying 'I love you' and all that, you could see the hurt on Stolas' face.

To be fair to Blitzø, he did need a moment to comprehend it was an actual confession, to truly see Stolas' feelings because it was such a contradiction to what he thought, but Stolas was so clear, of course he would take the joking as rejection, as Blitzø couldn't understand what he was really saying, until it was too late.

We can understand why Blitzø may have lashed out, thinking the way he does, but his words, his name calling of Stolas was so heartbreaking, you could hear Stolas' Heart and hope shatter when he said 'I think so highly of you Blitzø. I had no idea you thought so low of me.'

The miscommunication....

It's only after he can hear Stolas crying does Blitzø really get the memmo, he sees how he's messed up, but of course Stolas was so hurt, he wouldn't want to see Blitzø after that.

This was just so in character for them, to me at least. Stolas said everything right, but Blitzø took too long to understand his emotions, he lashed out and only after he lashed out did he understand what he did. By that point it was too late and Stolas sent him away....

I knew this breakup was coming, but I did NOT think it would hurt this much. Poor stolas..

Thanks for reading my ramblings lol, feel free to add to this with your own thoughts and opinions!

#helluva boss #stolitz #stolas #blitzo #blitzø #full moon #mini rant #helluva boss full moon

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beanghostprincess · 4 months

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Gonna watch the last episode of Fmab. I don't think I've cried harder in my entire fucking life.

#well yes op made me cry just as much #but the point is i am sobbing #hohenheim my beloved father of the year i love you darling :(#also roy i am going die i love him i love him i-#AND GREED??? LING??? DON'T TALK TO ME ABT THEM I WON'T SHUT UP THEY'RE MY FAV CHARACTERS #i can't do this anymore ed and al mesn so much to me rn #look this show was not supposed to make me this emotional #fmab #fullmetal alchemsit brotherhood

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lovesickeros · 9 months

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☆ even the gods bleed [ pt 2 ]

{☆} characters furina, neuvillette {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, multi-chapter, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings none {☆} word count 1.9k {☆} previous [ 1 ]

This had to be a punishment of some sort – some kind of divine punishment.

She was bored out of her mind just watching the sleeping body – she hadn't blinked once in the past five hours, her eyes were really starting to hurt. Yet they still hadn't moved so much as an inch since she sequestered them away to the only place she had known to be safe.

But it'd been almost a week since then.

The only solace she found was that Teyvat had seemed much less hellbent on collapsing in on itself like a dying star.

That counted for something.

Not much, but something!

..Even if their position was no better then it was a week ago.

There was, after all, still the issue of what to do about the false Creator – the actual imposter – and the Archons following them like blind lambs. The other Archons wouldn't listen if she tried to reason with them, and it would only risk the life of Divine One if she spoke of their location to anyone else.

She also was pretty fond of having her head still attached to her shoulders.

So she avoided them all together. Partially because she wasn't sure she wouldn't have a breakdown at the sight of them..she'd never been a fighter, and fighting an Archon? Easy pass.

Instead she was forced to babysit the sleeping Divine until they woke up while Neuvillette handled taking care of the nation and dealing with the other Archons – and by extension the false Creator.

Really though, she would almost think them dead if not for the subtle rise and fall of their chest.

Though..this also left her with a lot of time to herself. A lot of time to think.

She really didn't like it.

There wasn't a lot to occupy her mind and what little there was only distracted her for a scant few moments before her eyes drifted back to the Divine like she was locked in their orbit, unable to escape.

She closed the same book for the twelfth time – she kept count – and returned it to it's meticulously designed place within her bookcase. A low, barely audible huff of frustration escaped her lips before she could bite it down, her stare boring a hole into the body of the Divine One with a sharp intensity she rarely showed.

She was tired, bored and constantly on edge, fearing that at any moment someone would find out about their presence here.

That, at the drop of a hat, she would be powerless to stop the greatest tragedy of her time play out before her eyes.

Neuvillette would have scolded her for being so petulant, especially around the Divine One, if he were here.

But he wasn't.

He was out running her nation, instead.

And what was she doing? Nothing!

She grit her teeth, nails digging harshly into the palm of her hands as she took a deep breath – now was not the time to think about that. She had..much more pressing matters. Sulking and letting her thoughts spiral helped no one, least of all herself.

Yet her attention was caught by a harsh inhale, the rustle of fabric – were they finally waking up? She was exhausted, but it all vanished at the sudden drop of life within the otherwise deathly still body of the Divine.

Her eyes followed the subtle twitch of their fingers, watching as their brow furrowed and their features twisted in something almost like..pain.

..She wasn't ready.

What was she supposed to say?

Should she even say anything? Would that be considered impolite? Does she wait for them to speak first? Should she kneel? Bow?

She doesn't get much time to find her own answer before their lashes flutter, chest heaving with every strangled breath. Every single thought vanishes from her mind the moment she meets their eyes.

For a long, silent moment she thinks that her heart must have stopped.

Their eyes glow like the cresting of the sun over the horizon, painting the world in hues of gold – yet it also reminded her of the dipping of the moon below the waves, casting the briefest, most gentle of lights upon the world engulfed in darkness. In the depths of their eyes was the birth and death of stars in the infinite cosmos – glittering stars in a sea of empty, blank space that left her feeling lightheaded and breathless.

Beneath the splendor is a spark of recognition in their eyes so vibrant it was like a shooting star piercing through the dark night sky, leaving nothing but the wonder in the eyes of the observer as the only proof it ever existed – brilliant in it's beauty, however brief.

It is the most beautiful thing she has ever seen.

"Focalors?"

The lilt of their voice nearly made her knees buckle beneath her – euphoria so consuming it left her feeling she was starving swallowed her whole, her mind blanking in a moment of utter bliss. It was..an indescribable feeling that she doubted she could ever hope to put into words – not in a way that could properly express it, try as she might.

She swallowed the words that threatened to spill from her lips – she couldn't make a fool of herself. Not in front of them of all people. She'd never forgive herself.

"Divine One," She rasps, clearing her throat and covering her mouth with a hand to mask both her nervousness and the small smile that creeps across her face. She quickly regains her composure, hand resting on her hip as she puffs out her chest with every bit of pride she can manage. "I am sure you must be confused, but worry not– your most loyal acolyte has seen the truth!"

The silence is deafening.

She opens one eye, peaking at the bewildered and almost distraught expression of the Divine.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

That..she was not prepared for. Surely they knew who they were! Surely they knew. They had to– she's been praying to them for as long as she's breathed, she's dedicated every hour of her life to living up to their ideals, they can't just–!

"Lady Furina?"

Neuvillette, thankfully, spares her the embarrassment of having a meltdown in front of the Divine, the gentle rap of his knuckles against the door making her and the Divine pause, the soft lull of his voice soothing her nerves and yet setting her on edge at the same time.

"Neuvillette." She clears her throat again, her steps hurried as she marches to the door and pries it open none too gently, a forced smile pulling at her lips. She wastes no time tugging the man into the room, shutting the door behind him with a short huff. The silence is, somehow, even worse then before as the three of them stare at each other in absolute exasperation.

Neuvillette, for his part, manages to get his act together with a sharp clearing of his throat, bowing so low even she looks unnerved. She steals a brief glance at the Divine, and she's taken aback by the uncomfortability twisting their features into a grimace.

Their expression is schooled back into one of empty apathy when he stands back to his full height, but she saw it – she knows she did! Did they not like their worship? Were they not respectful enough? For a moment, she feared the Divine would smite Neuvillette down on the spot..but they just stared at him like he was a ghost.

"Why aren't you killing me?"

The defeated, resigned tone combined with the way their voice cracks makes her heart ache in her chest – it feels as though her entire world is crumbling down at her feet, and she cannot explain why she feels such emotions so strongly, but it is suffocating. It is almost as if Teyvat itself is weeping, bearing down upon her shoulders like a heavy weight.

She feels the urge to weep herself, but she powers through, gritting her teeth long enough for Neuvillette to take his place at the side of her – though it feels more like their – bed, kneeling like he was going to pray.

"Divine One," He offers a hand with a quiet rumble of his voice, the words slipping off his tongue like honey. It's like trying to soothe a stray cat..though she'd never voice such comparisons of the most Divine out loud. "I..we mean you no harm. I swear on my authority as the Iudex of Fontaine and Chief Justice that you are safe with us."

The skepticism she expected, but the reverence in which Neuvillette must convince them – or perhaps they are simply so tired that they simply did not care any longer if it was all some ploy to drive a knife between their ribs. She didn't expect them to actually place their hand in Neuvillette's.

He didn't either, judging by the way he visibly brightened – not that they'd notice, but she did.

..Not that she could really blame him, her heels clicking against the floorboards as she shifted her weight to the other foot with a nervous energy that was practically bursting at the seams, more then a little jealous of the attention he was receiving. She was the one who found them, she was the one who stayed with them the entire time..but he gets all the attention?

How unfair.

"O-of course! We would never lay a hand on our creator," She adds, her voice a little higher pitched then she would have liked as she placed her hands on her hips, puffing out her chest and brushing off the sting of jealousy. "Least of all I– your most loyal, most devout acolyte!"

She felt baffled when she heard the sound of their laughter, her shoulders hunching and her cheeks flushing on mere instinct – she was expecting mockery, but the look in their eyes, still dulled by a pain she cannot even begin to imagine, made her hesitate.

..It was, perhaps, the most genuine thing she'd heard from them ever since before the hunt began.

She wasn't sure why her heart hurt at such an idea, but it was enthralling to see the beginnings of a half hearted smile on their lips.

For a moment, her mask of theatrics was forgotten as she stared at them in a mixture of awe and adoration– and though she didn't look at Neuvillette, she could imagine he must've shared such an expression.

Had she any doubts that they were her Creator, that they alone were the most Divine..they would wiped clean now. There was no mistaking the way the world itself seemed to grow clearer as they glanced up at her like she was worth something.

For a moment, she realized how cold the false Creators gaze had been now that she has felt warmth so gentle it almost made her knees buckle beneath her. It felt like a pale imitation, now.

Nothing could compare to the warmth that spread through her body at the mere semblance of a smile upon their lips. She didn't even mind if it was her they were laughing at anymore, she just wanted to hear them laugh again.

She'd make a fool of herself, if she had to.

She'd never felt so..ravenous for such a thing, but just the briefest glimpse was addictive.

She simply couldn't help herself from striding across the room and clasping their free hand in her own, her smile wide enough to unnerve as she leaned her weight onto the bed. For a moment, she considered pulling away at the way they startled, but her mind was made up by then – there was no going back.

"Again."

#sagau #genshin sagau #self aware genshin #genshin impact sagau #self aware genshin impact #fic tag #neuvillette #focalors #furina #dont ask what happened here idk #this was. also supposed 2 be neuvi focused and then i.#dont talk 2 me abt focalors i wont ever shut up #got a 300k word essay on hand abt how i feel abt her character/how i interpret her personality and her story #focalors jsut like me fr fr (cries at the slightest inconvenience or the slightest mean comment)#shes so pathetic girlfail im gonna chew on her #what happens when reader gets stuck with two emotionally repressed french bastards?? hell #neuvi is the “emotionless” flavor of emotionally repressed in that hes HORRIBLE at showing emotions at all #ask him to smile and its incredibly unnerving and theres too many teeth but hes trying his best please call him pretty or he will cry :(#furina is the flavor of emotionally repressed where she makes it up by having Too Many emotions #using theatrics and masks to show everyone what they want to see but inside this girl is a MESS #constant anxiety and panic 24/7 #will do random shit and look at you and if u dont compliment her she will think u hate her and cry #compliment her and she'll do even stupider shit to try and impress you more #i love my scrunkly little babies they r so stupid and mentally ill someone get these bitches some THERAPY #i want 2 put them under a microscope #watch this be ooc fr furina when more of her lore drops if shes not girlfail im leaving #anyway see u in a week im going on a trip ill get back 2 u in 6-7 business days

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