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michaeljoncarter · 2 years

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Re: Worlds Without A Justice League - Green Lantern

I'm wondering if you've seen the CBR Interview PKJ gave? He got so into Jason for a moment there:

"I'd encourage Jason fans to imagine how his life might have gone without Bruce's influence. Imagine tough-as-nails street kid Jason Todd who makes his bones among the Gotham underworld, later gets adopted by the al Ghuls, and is finally chosen by the ring. How awesome would that character be, and how visually interesting? I'm a massive Jason Todd fan. He would have made an incredible GL, and I wanted to include him, at least visually."

What do you think about that take if I may ask? The assumption that Jason would be adopted by the al Ghuls (or would have anything to do with them for that matter) without a connection to Bruce strikes me as highly unlikely, and Jason being an incredible GL, I guess, maybe?

the biggest issue i have is the same one i’ve had since all this was announced, and that’s that it just kinda feels like a continuation of this trend of very few people at dc seeming to know enough about the universe to utilize it fully. or like... correctly

i get that this is an au and things are supposed to be different and off, but the things that are off don’t feel deliberately off. they feel off in the same way nearly everything in the dcu feels off--because it feels like there’s only a surface-level understanding of a lot of the aspects involved

and i wanna be clear that i don’t think pkj is the worst perpetrator of this by any stretch of the imagination. i feel a little bad about how mean i’m being because dark crisis gl isn’t that bad. the story is at least focused on john, with jason just in the background, and, again, this is just a weird little event tie-in set in an alternate universe, not any main title, so imo it’s not a huge deal if some stuff is wrong

everything about the inclusion of jason is just so annoying because it could have so easily been so much better and made SO much more sense, and it’s coming on the heels of years of nearly everything i’ve read from dc also leaving me with the feeling of “man, that could’ve been great if the writer had read more about the thing they were supposed to be writing about”

there are all these big, obvious opportunities with so much untapped potential lying around absolutely everywhere, and they’re hardly ever taken advantage of. instead, we get characters thrown into random situations that don’t really make sense for them or relate to them specifically

along with, like you said, the inclusion of the al ghuls not really making any sense for them, pkj’s said that jason would be a “kick-ass” green lantern, that he’d be “incredible,” and it’s like... ok. if you think so. but would he be a good fit for the green lanterns? does he make sense with the green lanterns?

because it’s not just the “corps of super badasses with sick rings who look real cool,” you know? green lantern rings are attracted to very specific characters with very specific traits and mindsets, and not only am i just really not convinced jason fits the bill, it’s all made so much more frustrating by the fact that there IS a lantern corps that does fit him perfectly

jason’s already a character people have wanted to have a lantern arc for years. if we’re making this version of him basically the same character as main universe jason with a few very minor tweaks, why not just give him the ring he’s so painfully obviously meant for? because he is the fucking archetype of a red lantern

(and i know some people get all up in arms about this, thinking it’s coming from the “angry robin” mischaracterization of him, but stick with me for a minute here because that’s not it at all)

it’s just frustrating to see the dude who’s absolutely PERFECT for a lantern ring in pretty much every way, who people have been saying SHOULD be a lantern for years, actually finally get a ring... except it’s not the one that was all but tailor made for him and instead one that makes almost no sense and doesn’t really relate to his character in any significant way

i want to be generous and say it’s possible pkj made him green instead of red because maybe he thought real deep into it and, with his extensive knowledge of green lantern lore, decided there would be no red lanterns in this universe, but when he got on twitter responding to people asking him why he didn’t give jason a red ring, he never said anything to that effect, and it mostly just seemed like he didn’t really know much about them

...yes??? yes, they all do? that is... the POINT of the red lanterns. that’s literally their whole thing. and not only that, but they’re much smaller than any of the other corps. there are only a handful of them, so we’ve actually gotten to see pretty much every single one, and they have all fit into that characterization

i know i’m getting a little off track here, but this tweet genuinely haunts me lol like if you’ve never read anything with red lanterns in it, i need you to understand how completely and totally NOT SUBTLE they are about this. pretty much every time a red lantern appears on the page, they immediately start waxing poetic about why they’re doing what they’re doing

sorry, but this isn’t exactly easy to miss. the red lanterns are a group composed entirely of victims of horrific injustices whose entire purpose is seeking out and avenging other victims of horrific injustices. they were literally founded by a father trying to avenge his murdered child.

jason is such a perfect fit for them, it’s comical, and the fact that a real, actual dc writer who’s written a real, official comic about lanterns specifically and who is saying he’d like to write MORE about them would argue otherwise is just... nghgnhngrnhffng

add to that the fact that there IS actually a batfam member who fits the profile of a green lantern to nearly as ridiculous a degree, and it ain’t jason. it’s cassandra. seriously. she’s such a good fit that even i, president of the bats-with-lantern-rings haters association, wouldn’t be mad if she was given a green lantern arc. but instead of using her, it was just slapped on the random dude 2 characters to the left of her who it makes very little sense for

again, this isn’t the worst example of this by any means, and it’s not really pkj or this specific story that makes this all so frustrating, but it’s just that it’s yet another instance where there were so many opportunities! so many ways, so many incredibly obvious ways, something like this could’ve gone that could’ve been SO INTERESTING and SO FITTING FOR EVERYONE INVOLVED! and we got... none of them. seemingly just because the writer hasn’t really read enough to make the connections

and just to be clear, i’m not just saying all this because of one line in an interview and a couple tweets. there’s a lot he gets fundamentally wrong about john and the glc at large both in other parts of interview and in dark crisis gl itself that leave me with... questions, comments, concerns, and the general feeling he might be getting a lot of his information from fandom osmosis, but i’m not gonna get into that here because this post is already ungodly long lol

idk!! i just really wish dc comics writers would read more dc comics!!!

#LONG POST #ask #anonymous #jason todd #this is soo all over the place #also sorry this took so long to answer! i do not have an excuse im just slow

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chifuyusgangshirt · 2 years

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What if Shinichiro was not dead after the hit on the head but in a deep coma and people had no ideas of when he would wake up. Mikey, Emma, Izana, Wakasa, Benkei, Takeomi, everyone goes regulary at his bedside and try to speak with him, in the hope he wakes up. In some chronologies Kisaki kill him (of course). Even in Manila and Izana never knew. Anndd Shinichiro wakes up just before the fight of Toman 2 against the Kanto Manj (he's not killed by Kisaki or some of Mikey's ennemis this time).

Wow man I would call the the ultimative alternative reality.

I honestly think the manga would have been so much different if that was the case.

First of all Kazutora

Kazutora probably would have been sent to juvie but I'm not sure if he will be as mad at Mikey as he was in the manga because, yeah while he is still in a coma and that sucks ass, he isn't dead and the possibility he wakes up would be pretty high if he and lived that long. So let's say, he is still mad at mikey -Mikey still wouldn't want to kill him here. 100% that this isn't a reason for past mikey to go killer mode. I really don't believe that. So his life is not in danger and maybe mikey would have tried to let this fight play out differently. I also don't think the guilt in Baji would be as big as in the og so maybe he would triy to bring Kazutora back with the others together instead.

Baji survives and Kazutora isn't sent to juvie

Inui

This might sound weird but I feel like if shinichiro is still alive even if in a coma he would join toman rather than taiju, only because if shinichiro wakes up he would -in inui's imagination- take over the black dragons again or fuse them together. To be honest it always confused me that he never went to mikey in the first place. Mikey would remind me more of shinichiro than out little dc villain Izana.

So if we are lucky no black dragons conflict. Bad side effect here: taiju will continue abusing his siblings.

Emma

I firmly think the tenjiku arc will mostly play out the same way as before because the underlying problem here was izana's loneliness, jealousy and obsession. Without shin he will get off the rails. Dead or just not in his life anymore doesn't matter here. He will still be mad at mikey and thinks he stole his place in the family but I do think that he would re-consider killing one of the siblings. Does he wanna manipulate Mikey? Probably and killing maybe too but Emma? Not Emma. Shinichiro could wake up and since Emma never had to a thing to do with all this it could break their bond. (In izana's minset)

So Emma could survive

The three deities arc

Braham would still be a thing. Takeomi's greedy ass was what created it and wakasa and benkei would still join for whatever reason.

South would still be a problem. The S62 would still be there.

But kanto manji? Big question mark here because it could be that not losing baji and Emma is enough to make him realize he is allowed to love, feel week and afraid of losing. Maybe. But it could also be that it was his plan all along to continue alone once it gets too dangerous for the others. Especially baji would probably try to work together with draken and try to get him back. He is his childhood friend and obviously one of the few who couldn't move on from him. So he might help draken, taking kazutora with him. With more back up the shooting could have been avoided

Draken has a 50/50 chance to survive

Mikey

Let's say everything happend like I said expect draken is dead and mikey is still the kanto leader. Would he try to kill takemichi? Yes.

And everything would be the same until the battle. I'm pretty sure Sanzu would have to go against senju and baji, the flashback included him and with him being still alive the table turned. He also knew what really happend so we might have gotten to the point faster.

But this all isn't important because if shinichiro wakes up and they make him come with them there are exactly two things that could happen: mikey has a breakdown and shinichiro comforts him, telling him to please come back home.

Or mikey loses it and can't cope that now shinichiro decides to wake up, after all the years he needed him. Would still end in a break down but there could be a different outcome, which I personally don't think would ever happen but wakui really confused mw the past chapters so;

mikey kills shinichiro

#whups sorry for the rant #had to be done #very interesting idea? what would u think could happen?#tokyo revengers #tokyorev #tokyo revengers spoilers #mikey manjiro sano #takemichi hanagaki #sanzu haruchiyo #baji keisuke #seishu inui #emma sano #izana kurokawa

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pandora15 · 2 years

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also I do this too much and I feel bad ranting on tumblr about it but I don't really know what else to do.

I guess all I'll say is that I write for myself primarily but I always think about how people will respond to the things I write. And maybe I shouldn't do that, but I can't help it. It's tough for me to turn that part of my brain off, even though I preach about doing it all the time.

Maybe instead of alternating between so many projects at a time, I should just focus on one at a time? That way I can try to update a bit more regularly. Or even just take a pause on updating things altogether, finish writing all my multi-chapter fic, and then resume with a regular posting schedule?

idk maybe I'm being ungrateful or just overthinking things. I am juggling a lot in my life and obviously I enjoy writing fic and would like to continue to do so, but focusing on one project at a time (excluding collabs) might be the smarter thing for me to do.

#but also feasibly i can't do that because i do like working on multiple things at a time #idk my brain is in seven different places right now so #idk #pandora's ramblings

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rachelminetti · 2 years

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september 2021 music!

it’s september 2022, i dug through the archives to post this before i type up this year’s september playlist. a lot has stayed the same, 2021 set the tone for the next few septembers, it seems.

everything is less intense, more settled in. great month of music for me, a lot of stereolab, autocollants, and homelife. very gentle, not necessarily subtle. i'm fully engulfed in this subgenre of twee - anything that's soft, a little dreamy, blue-tinted and slightly sedative. maybe this is rooted in nostalgia, for a time i only vaguely remember, yet crave without means to an end.

i know it's 7 days into october, but my music hasn't shifted quite yet and i put too much effort into these playlists to leave them without an audience. but first i'll list some of my favorite songs from last month, songs that still haven't been worn out, some that might make it into a favorites playlist. and then i will get into the smaller playlists i made to keep things organized, group genres/moods together, force a little cohesion into the mix. (i obviously did not get around to this. the playlists are made though! and can be found here: i learned a lot of good things this afternoon, still here?, too fast?, watch your step!, brain replaced by something, supreme nothing)

songs!

op hop detonation - stereolab

cobra and phases group play voltage in the milky night... // 1999

there is not a bad stereolab song. they are a group of utter consistency, everything just works, hits where it needs to. this song works well on a loop, like going down a factory line. maybe playing in an orange monochrome suburban bathroom that hasn't been updated since the 70s, maybe taking a moped down a twisting side street.

afterglow - pine*am

pull the rabbit ears // 2005

this song/album brought me to a days long deep dive into discogs and rateyourmusic, mostly while sitting up at the reference desk at the library, copy and pasting links into an email i'd send to myself at the end of the hour. it introduced me to picopop, shibuya-kei, brought me further onto this side of twee pop. this song feels like something, unnamed. the theremin (probably, maybe) is haunting, clear. i'll probably try to find a used CD sometime soon.

nothing at all - the autocollants

why couldn't things just stay the same // 1999

this album has given me so much, i could listen to it everyday, every drive to and from work. this isn't a stationary song, it's very much in motion, i must be going somewhere, moving along somehow. i'm sad about nothing at all.

on a rampant multi-tab google search at the circ desk at the library, i found a website that i will most definitely spend countless hours on in the future, TweeNet. a goddamn dream come true. this makes me want to plan another radio show, bless the columbia airwaves with this eternal tenderness.

est - greenscreen

greenscreen // 2019

can't find anything about this band/musician/group/whatever. kind of reminds me of boothe's gentle absurdity (though they're album is no longer available in my country? i miss eggs are 0's) (2022 update: bought the mp3 on bandcamp, all is well). this song is mesmerizing, a little hypnotizing, a little bit cryptic. definitely mysterious, but i'll keep it that way. i learned a lot of good things this afternoon.

one we kiss - jenny mae

there's a bar around the corner...assholes // 1995

god i love this song. maybe i was a college radio dj in the 90s in some alternate timeline or something. this just sounds like wusc on any given tuesday, tucked into the mundane.

east side glory - marnie stern

the chronicles of marnia // 2013

looking forward to continuing to gradually make my way through marnie stern's discography, though i'm saddened that this was her final album (for now maybe?).

#monthly #playlist #twee pop #stereolab #pine*am #the autocollants #jenny mae #marnie stern

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annabreaksthings · 13 days

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For sure! I love the series as a whole because it's not near as sugar coated as a lot of other war-based books. You get to hear about the good, the bad, and the ugly. Granted, there's still some glossing over of details, but overall it's very tastefully done. And I really appreciate how it mirrors real life events and people. This adds quite a bit of credibility to the alternative timeline of the book, just because it did happen historically and we know the outcome. Now we just added a female presence.

As for the characters, they are really well done, especially the badass female leads. Rio richlin is just *chef's kiss* and by far my favorite. Rainy is a close second. I also appreciate the character development in this series, both individually and within their interpersonal relationships. It's very realistic and believable based on what the characters are going through. I'm especially impressed with Geer's development, as a person learning how to work in a group and how not to be a general ass all the time. Then there's the relationship he has with Pang throughout the series, going from being very racist, to having a great working relationship/friendship, to becoming a huge advocate after the war and Pang's death. I liked seeing Rio herself and her relationship with Castain develop too as the war progressed. I could go on about that quite a bit. And of course I wish there was more Rio/Jack and that she had dumped Strand's ass to the curb as soon as he couldn't handle her success. But, that also speaks a bit to Rio's people pleasing nature (and the social standards at the time), even though being in the war/command positions should have given her some more confidence.

Other than that, this just makes me realize how much I'm due for a reread lol

First of all, I'm so sorry this took a month to answer 😓 My computer has been out of commission and the thought of typing up (and then probably reorganizing) a long, semi-coherent response on my phone made me want to chuck it in a lake. Please know I've been thinking of this every day because I'm so excited to talk about these books with someone again!!

Anyway.

My friend, you've taken the words right out of my head with everything you wrote here. I'm with you 100% on all of this. (putting the rest of this under a cut to spare the masses)

You're so right on the realism - I feel like so many other historical fiction books are either sanitized for younger (or squeamish) audiences, or they swing to the complete opposite direction and become a bit dry with the level of detail unless you're a super history buff. Purple Hearts in particular was hard to read at times, but I think maybe it should be. There were a lot of ugly things that really happened, and I'm glad to find an author that doesn't shy away from it for the sake of a squeaky clean image of the allies.

I think I said it in another post a long time ago, but I'm so fascinated by the butterfly effect possibilities this story presents. Obviously the women in canon have proven that they're highly effective in all kinds of roles previously restricted to men, but does that continue after the war? Would it change anything for women in the workforce during peacetime? Or would there still be regression to "traditional" gender norms similar to what we saw in the 40's and 50's? I wish there was more fic or meta for these books because I would love to hear tons more ideas on this.

I could go on about Rio for hours, too. The way she goes from only signing up because Jenou did (and she would follow Jenou off a cliff if asked, I think) to being a highly respected, highly decorated NCO and figuring out she's good at this is one of my favorite things. The section with Strand telling her she's just "playing soldier" is so interesting because if I remember correctly (I'm due for a reread too, it's been a while), she does fight back on that idea at first, but I can see her start to believe it assuming he keeps it up back home.

And Strand. Strand. I too wish he would have been kicked to the curb for the sake of truth, justice, and the American Way, but at the same time, as a piece of fiction, I'm kind of glad he didn't. Most people don't walk away from unhealthy relationships at the first red flag (or second... or third...), and I think there's a fine line to be walked here between normalizing this kind of behavior in relationships and helping people to feel less alone in their own struggles. Unfortunately for our characters, I feel like staying with him fits Rio's MO and realities of the day just as you said. There's something to be said for nostalgia, too, especially when they keep meeting up during the war. He's a little slice of home when she's knee deep in mud and gore, and maybe a little glimpse of the girl she would have been without a war. Who wouldn't want that? Again, there are 1000 fics to write on this... what was the final straw to get her to leave?

But what I would give to see the Strands of the world get what's coming to them....

On the other side, Jack is definitely one of my favorites. He's hilarious in the first book, and I so wish he would have gotten more screentime in the 3rd. But again, for historical accuracy, I can see why he's not when he's reporting to Rio, and why she shoots him down. (Even though it's so painful to read 😭)

What I really love about this though, along with the epilogue, is the theme of relationships and professional success coming later in life. Frangie's married and has kids (teenagers even!) before she becomes a doctor, but she's a doctor nonetheless!! And Rio's been divorced for years and has been in a long relationship-free spell before Jack walks back into her life (presumably with Rainy's meddling). It's so refreshing to see characters who don't have it all figured out at 22, or settle down with their first love, or reach their wildest dreams on the first try. But they keep growing and changing and living, and I think we could all stand to do a little more of that.

#this was so much fun to write and I will gladly talk Front Lines with anyone at any time #front lines anon #michael grant #front lines #books #my TBR really doesn't need to grow right now but a person's gotta do what she's gotta do (i.e. reread)

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vodka-redbull-daily · 5 months

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November 22nd, 2023 (Part 1)

*Graphic Sexual Content*

It's been quite a while since I've received a dick pic. It feels kind of weird complaining about that. I don't think I'm even complaining, but most people would be so happy to stop Having to look at random people's dicks. It was kind of fun collecting them if I'm honest. it was fun showing them to D---- and laughing at them together. I'm not sure why that is. maybe I just finally got into the group of people that don't send dick pics very often and have weeded through all the ones that like to do that. although, I've also found so many people who like to flake. I'll make plans with a guy, then he either goes to me completely or keeps canceling over and over again. B--- has seemed like the best prospect, after F----. when F---- turned out to be kind of an asshole, B--- seems like he would be a good alternative. sure, he was incredibly boring and I had a sneaking suspicion sex would be ass, but he was so far most likely to be the most consistent person. but he ended up flaking on me two separate times before he finally just said that he wasn't going to try anymore. to be fair, those were his exact words, but I did try and make it work and he just straight up stopped answering my texts. oh well.

after having so many flakes, it's incredibly annoying and making it to where I kind of want to start looking at other sites. I've been getting semi good luck from this one site, but I'm running out of men in general, much less men that are actually going to meet me and pay me. W--- was an anomaly. I normally would not continuously go out with a person who's not paying me, but I really enjoyed him that first day and I even plan on seeing him later in the week. I know I'm going to have a good time and we'll probably end up having sex with him and I don't mind that. I obviously want to do that otherwise I wouldn't want to go. but it's incredibly annoying that I haven't gotten paid in quite a while. I really hope this isn't the death knell of my time as a sugar baby. I'll probably start signing up for some other sites soon enough. I found a Reddit thread about the sugar baby lifestyle, although it seems like I already have an account on the most popular site and everyone on there is kind of saying that it's shit. they're honestly isn't that much helpful information on there.

Today, I have plans to meet two different guys. I'm going to meet up with B------ around noon. I'm so excited to be able to meet up with him again. it's been quite a while since we fucked in the car and he keeps promising me that it'll be so much more enjoyable since he's going to actually get a hotel room. since it's so close to Thanksgiving, though, I told him that I'd be okay with only taking 100 this time instead of the usual 200 since most hotel rooms are extra expensive right now. yeah, this is a bad business move, especially since I keep complaining about how I haven't made that much money recently. but I'm also incredibly horny. and I enjoy B------ a lot. sue me. sometimes I just want to get dicked down by someone who actually knows what they're doing and isn't 103 years old.

We planed to meet at 12:30. he sent me the address to the hotel room and then also sent me some instructions to follow. apparently this is part of being a submissive. or it can be. I guess it's kind of like a role-playing thing, where the dominant will give you a set of instructions and you're supposed to do them. he had a special name for it but I forgot what it was. I'm sure I'll hear it again before too long. his instructions were to come to the room, take off all my clothes, and wait. pretty simple instructions. I also decided to go without any underwear or bra. F---- had asked me to do that and honestly I enjoy that more anyway. I fucking hate wearing underwear and a bra. sexy for the guy, comfy for me. win win. one last rule he had was that every time I came, I would have to lick it off of him. again, this is actually something I like so it wasn't that big a deal for me.

I got to the hotel, but he forgot to send me the room number so I waited for a while outside before he finally did. once he did that, I went over to the room and he opened the door for me, since hotel rooms lock automatically. I walked in, took off all my clothes and everything like he said, and waited. again, this wasn't a very difficult set of instructions. he had some music playing through a little speaker and was very quick to start touching me all over. his skin was just as soft as I remembered. his fingers were just as good as I remembered. it seemed that no matter how he touched me, I would get chills and goosebumps. it's so strange. two different people can touch me in the exact same way and my body will have such an immensely different reaction. I remembered when I was having sex with him, how he would Trace his fingers down my stomach, thigh, and underwear line. my entire body would shake with pleasure even though he wasn't actually even doing anything that sexual. it feels almost the same with B------. he could touch me on my back, on my arms, run his fingers through my hair I would already be on the edge of an orgasm. meanwhile, somebody else could do something similar and I would lay there like a dead fish. I want to get turned on, I'm probably already wet, but it's just not the same.

he also had me put on a blindfold which is very excited for. he had been telling me a little bit about sensory play, about putting on things like a blindfold and headphones so that your sense of touch was heightened. I was really looking forward to that. after I had the blindfold on, he led me to a little couch looking thing and had me kneel there while leaning against the arm. I wasn't uncomfortable, I could have stayed there for as long as he wanted me to. he continued to touch me, occasionally dipping his fingers up inside me. He commented on how wet I was. then he explained to me the game we were going to play.

This was going to be my first Step into getting into more BDSM things. it seems pretty much everybody is into impact play and that's honestly the first thing most people think of when I think of BDSM shit. he told me he had brought a bunch of different items, he was going to use them on me, and I was supposed to remember which one was which. he told me about this game before, how he had used it on other people. every time he would use one on me, he would ask me then to rate the Pain on a scale from 1 to 10 and then immediately after that asked me to write it on how much I enjoyed it from 1 to 10. there are quite a bit of them. I knew there were a bunch of different things they're used for this kind of stuff, I just didn't realize he had brought so many and then he was going to use so many of them on me. it was quite a bit of time that we spent actually doing this. he would tell me the name of it, then let me feel it with my hands, then you sit on me. he had me repeat what it was afterwards, then I would give him my numbers. I think I can remember them all off the top of my head:

Flogger: A leather flogger. pretty simple, if you know what a flogger is you know what this is. I can't remember exactly what I judged each of these on each scale, but I do remember that this is one of my favorites. not that painful and I actually quite enjoyable.

long flogger: very similar to the first, but longer. obviously. this one hurt a little bit more but still definitely one of my favorites. again, I actually enjoyed it and was it in terrible pain.

stinging fogger: this one had little thin strands and was much more painful than the other two floggers. I didn't like it that much, but they're definitely worse things on this list.

thuddy flogger: heavy and thick leather straps on this one. surprisingly, it actually didn't hurt very bad at all. it was definitely one of my favorites since the Pain Scale is very low and with all the floggers he was able to run them across my skin at a certain way that was very pleasurable.

dragon's tongue: this one was the first one he used. I was basically thick sheet of plastic that was cut down the middle. very much like a tongue of a serpent like it was named after. it reminded me a lot of those plastic clapping hands that you get from a shitty arcade. it definitely wasn't the worst, but it was not my favorite. low to mid-range on the pay scale and made to high range on the pleasure scale.

hemp cane: this was what seemed to be hemp just tied in a fancy way to make it kind of like a stick or rod. it was stiff enough to be painful, but because it was made out of a kind of rope, it wasn't as painful as I was expecting. I actually enjoyed the soft scratchy feeling of it. Another mid-range one on the Pain Scale and the pleasure scale.

short paddle: a pretty thick wooden paddle with holes drilled into it. once I felt the holes with my hand, I was nervous. I knew that that would help with the speed and pain. although, it did finally enough remind me of Swiss cheese. it was pretty painful and I didn't enjoy it very much at all. although, still not the worst.

long paddle: as the name suggests, it's exactly the same as the prior one just longer. this one was more painful and I disliked it even more because of that.

Tiny: B------ told me this was the first BDSM Type Toy he had ever gotten. and it wasn't even actually a toy. it was a wood especially he bought from Target and had filed down to make it a toy. I have heard about trying to make your own toys being pretty unsafe and this was actually very painful. I really didn't like it that much at all. still not the worst, but very near the bottom.

the rod: this one was the worst. he did warn me that it was going to be incredibly painful and didn't use it very hard or very much. in fact, he relegated only three strikes with both of these last two ones because he knew that they were more painful than the other ones. he also said that he actually didn't use these during play, more for a “punishment” type situation. it was just a long, metal rod. I obviously hated it.

the stick: surprisingly, this one wasn't that bad. this was another one that was supposed to be used in a “punishment” type situation, but since it was pretty much just a yardstick that was a little bit thicker, it wasn't that bad. me and my siblings just a whack each other with yardsticks fairly often, so maybe I'm just used to the feeling already. but honestly, I would prefer that over some of the paddles that he had used earlier.

after we had gone through each one individually, he went back and picked five at random. he said that if I got all five right, I would get reward. if I got less than three right, I would get a punishment. little did he know, that I am way too competitive for my own good. whenever there's a game involved, whether it be the religious crap that I had to do when I was younger or the BDSM shit, I tend to take any challenge probably way too seriously. there's a reason they stopped letting me play games with the other kids who didn't go to church as often as I did in religious education. he also gave me three chances to guess each toy, which led to me getting every single one correct. a few of them I even got right on the first try.

my reward? he ate me out. I was pretty surprised by this, though I shouldn't have been since he did say that giving pleasure to his Partners is actually one of his favorite things. he and I are very similar in that way. this makes B------ the third person I've ever slept with that actually gave me head. maybe I should add that to my statistics. unfortunately for B------, I've actually received much better head.

it wasn't bad. it was actually very good and I might have cum in his mouth if he had gone a little bit longer. he definitely was more into licking my ass, which he had told me he was in the ass eating before, than he really was focused on my pussy and clit. T----- was also in eating ass, but he usually did the two separately. He was definitely the best person I've ever had. I don't know how he knew, but he would always put his tounge exactly where I wanted. the perfect mix of speeding, up slowing down, more direct focus on the clit, using his fingers inside me to make me absolutely scream with pleasure. B------ was good, but I don't know if he'll ever stand a chance against him. not to mention he did it every time we had sex. it seemed like it was one of his favorite things to do. I remember once when I was on my period and we were just getting to the point where he would fuck me and he leaned down and whispered in my ear about how badly he wanted to eat me out. how sad he was that I was on my period. I'm hot just now thinking about it.

I miss him so badly.

it wasn't a bad reward. it wasn't exactly what I was expecting, but pretty soon after that, he was actually putting his dick inside me. There was a little bit of pain as he stretched me out. I guess I still wasn't used to him. he's definitely the biggest I've ever been with. he will probably always be the biggest I will have ever been with. it took me a little bit, but eventually he was able to fuck me without any pain. I'm pretty sure he went all the way inside me this time. it only took us three times before he was able to actually bury that big ass cock deep inside me. he felt so good inside me, but he wouldn't let me cum. I would wine and beg and plead and squirm and moan so loud with pleasure, but the Orgasm denial that he showed me that first day was back. I loved it. when he finally let me cum, it was such a wave of relief. after that, he took me off the bed and had me lick up my cum off his dick. I guess that checks off the mandatory dick sucking that's required and every single sexual encounter I have, but it wasn't bothered by it because I actually like the taste of my own cum. it was the only time we ended up doing that even though it was one of his rules. I asked him about it afterward, why he had stopped enforcing that role, and he said that I just came so much all the time and he really didn't want to have to stop and start over and over again.

pretty soon, he had me on all fours. again, his dick was shoved inside me and this angle is one of my favorites. doggy style seems to always just hit that right spot for me, and B-------'s dick always pushes me to my limit. I had to beg for my orgasm again. the way his hands would grab my waist and he would use my whole body as a fleshlight, just pounding himself inside me. it's like heaven. he did eventually let me have another orgasm. then, he told me to stay exactly in place and I felt him get off the bed. I heard him moving things around. more toys.

when he came back, he squirted Lube all over my ass, even getting some of it dripping to my legs. not that big deal as my own cum was already dripping down my legs. his finger gently dipped inside my asshole. we had talked about how I wasn't ready to do anal with his actual cock yet. he was just way too big and even though I had done anal with F----, F---- had not been that big. plus, we had talked about how much I enjoyed the double penetration T---- had done to me so long ago. sure enough, after he had sufficiently lubedme up, I felt a vibrating toy being pushed inside. it felt kind of like anal beads. I definitely was enjoying myself. soon, he also pushed dick back into my pussy. such a strange sensation, getting so much pleasure from the two different places at the same time. it was hard to focus on one, hard to feel exactly where all my pleasure was coming from. I had to beg for my orgasm a few more times.

After a little bit, he took the toy out of my ass and began lubing it up again. in between each time he did this, He would instruct me to stay exactly where I was. I would be there on the bed, ass open in the air, just waiting for him to stick something else in. and he always did. a new toy soon entered me, this time pretty clearly a butt plug. we went back to him fucking me with that inside me. we went round and round with me begging to cum, him denying me until it was almost too much, then letting me go. he also kept changing out the plug, getting bigger and bigger each time. he ended up using four different ones, and on the last one I was definitely beginning to feel stretched. it was almost painful, almost to the point where I asked him to stop. I stretched and stretched and gripped the sheets. right at the last second, right before I called it off, my ass took the whole thing. I was definitely stretched, and there was a twinge of pain, but it definitely was not unbearable and I got enough pleasure from it that I was able to ignore the pain. from here, he fucked me until he came inside me also allowing me another orgasm of my own. I came seven times. he usually makes me count, so I kept counting just in case.

After that, I took the blindfold off and he gave me a towel to clean myself up with. not very many men do that. I kind of forgot he did that. it's such a weird mix being with all these guys and even the ones that you feel like do kind of care about your experience don't do that kind of stuff. after we cleaned ourselves up, he had me go ahead and look at all the toys he had used. we started with the anal stuff, because he wanted to show off how good I had done. I was incredibly surprised to see the toys I had you just had inside me laying out there on the towel. the biggest one, the one that I had a little bit of trouble with, was so much bigger than I had imagined. in thickness, it was pretty comparable to B------. all of them are also much longer than I expected. he also showed me what I thought to be anal beads, but it was pretty much just a vibrator with a bunch of little orbs on it. the thing was close to 7 in long, and he told me I took all of it. he was really excited, since this meant that I could probably eventually take him. it really wouldn't take that much longer or that much more stretching before I Would be able to fit his entire dick in my ass.

he also had me look at all the toys he had me rank. most of them, looked exactly how I imagined them based on how they felt in my hands. he had me sort them from the one I like the most so the one I like the least out on the bed. we talked about them a little bit, he explained to me the story of tiny, he told me about other toys he wanted to use, toys he wanted to buy, all kinds of stuff. he washed off all the anal toys for me, gave me instructions on how to take care of them, and told me that I could take them home. his only rule was anytime I use them I had to talk to him about it. and I want to use them, but that means I have to go out and buy Lube at some point. he also told me he had gotten me more but they just had to come in on time. he said there's suction cup on the bottom. very intriguing.

after talking about the toys and him showing me some of the girls he had been with before and talking about that plus some of the gangbang groups he was in, he asked me when I had to leave and how many times I had cum. I told him 7 and I really didn't have a time I need to leave, since the only plans I had for the day was going to my meet and greet with S-- but that wasn't until 7:00 and it was only two at that point. he thought about it for a second, and said he thought he could squeeze in at least four more orgasms.

I laid back down on the bed, he finished cleaning the last of the toys and got them all packaged up, then we were at it again. this time, every time I asked he let me cum. I was mostly on my back, but he also turned me on my side, twisting my torso my legs separately I'm pushing himself deep inside me that way. I never been in that position before and I enjoyed it very much. since he wasn't denying me any orgasm this time, I came over and over and over again. like I usually do with others. in all honesty, this time was even better than when I was blindfolded. I think since he was actually less focused on the performance side of it and more on just a good plain old fucking, he was a little bit more rough, more straight to the point then the fancy start And stop and specialize movement to try and get somebody on the edge without pushing them over. instead, we just had a good old fashioned fuck. I ended up cuming 12 times in the span of about 10 to 15 minutes. and he also came again, saying that was the quickest he's ever cum twice in a row. I've heard that a few times. even W---- said something about how he had a hard time actually cuming due to the mix of medication he was on and was very pleased when he was able to cum inside me.

we talked for a little bit longer, he gave me the money, gave me the anal toys, then I left. he stayed behind a little bit longer to clean up a little bit and who knows, maybe he invited another girl over. I have no clue. we talked a little bit about his past conquests and he said he's been with at least 120 people off this one site alone. for all I know, he invited a girl immediately after me. I wouldn't be bothered by it. it's not like I'm not doing the exact same thing later on tonight.

#blog #daily blog #suagr baby #suagr dating #vodka redbull #my writing #spilled thoughts #daily journal #journal

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fearoftheminotaur · 9 months

Text

So a trend I've been seeing, and not quite aligning with in transmisogyny discourse, namely discourse over the B*rbie movie ending on here (which, non-transfems should be fucking off from), and twitter discourse on body hair, is a sort of choice to differentiate instead of to show solidarity, in circumstances where I actually see solidarity being the better choice.

Because the point where solidarity stops being the correct option is when something is not speaking in favor of your interests, and I think that in both of these cases the transmisogyny present actually presented ample opportunity for favorable outcomes. In fact I think a lot of transmisogynistic discourse is doing the same thing to us, claiming differentiation and appropriation when we call out problems that affect more than just ourselves.

To zone in on the Twitter example, there were some posts about how women shaving our body hair is an unhealthy beauty standard. And while this sparked the general "it's my choice/I am not shaming you I'm just saying we live in a society/well I think she should be shamed" back and forth, there was also some that honed in on the way that shaving can be a part of transfems' survival, and how trans women's hair is scrutinized in a way that non-transfems' is not; and that piqued my interest because I truly did not see a contradiction between critique of our society's attitude towards body hair, and the fact that I'm going to keep shaving.

I guess what I'm driving at here is that if body hair discourse is being promulgated by people who don't include trans women in their beauty standards, I think that hypocrisy is a great jumping off point to talk about how this stuff affects us, and that the main alternative we have is continuing the propagation of this beauty standard that hurts us. I'd rather have a hypocritical enemy than a consistent one.

And it's not just about stigmatizing vs encouraging transition/assimilation, because with the post I saw about the MargRob movie it's the opposite. This is kind of a spoiler, but a certain movie ends with a female character who earlier stated she did not have a vagina, going to a gyno. In context this did stem from a cis-centric view of feminism, however it was also compatible with the experiences of many transfems. I think in a time where healthcare for trans people is so under attack, it feels a little misplaced to attack the idea that someone would be happy about having stereotypical feminine anatomy - some women have penises, and the ones who want to change that shouldn't be told "be happy with what you have".

Yes, when a lot of people say the word "woman", they aren't thinking of us, and maybe they don't even include us: but we are women whether people see us that way or not, and that means that not everything they say will exclude us and that is an opportunity to prove we are who we say we are. We shouldn't have to, but we are being asked to, day after day.

Obviously, the pink movie is a giant hit that probably most transfems who watched it liked, and body hair discourse basically did what it needed to do; I just think there's an interesting trend in discourse arguments that I disagree with - something about this pseudo-separatist point of view that isn't gelling with me.

And I think it's the same thing that fuels charity streams being taken down because the people and content weren't 100% unproblematic, even if the recipients were clearly worthwhile; or a hashtag for a killed trans teenager being called in bad taste because the girl was white - things that kinda feel like they are derailing positive change.

I don't care about civility and respectability. I don't care about compromise. I care about being able to identify the best action in the long run, and I think that focusing on the ways that we are different only matters when someone is trying to make your life worse. Otherwise the instinct becomes to punish wrongdoers, even if that means hurting yourself in the process.

An instinct to say "you don't include me, so I'm going to be the scorpion to your frog". Maybe that has validity in the long term, at least for one or two of the examples I gave above; maybe cracks in an "inclusive" movement fester into something far worse, like often happens to certain pundits and YouTube channels shifting to the right.

But in the short term I just look at conversations that separatism (from any group) derails and think, "this could have helped us all".

#//genital mention #//barbie spoilers #//death mention

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netflixnarratives · 2 years

Text

Why I am doing this?

My life is in danger - that's why I am doing this. If I cannot heal my wounds and remove the "knives" struck inside my body next year will be extremely miserable - tragic for me. Again. There will be a repeat of 2016 - I can feel it, sense it, smell it. Everything that is happening to me now is just a decoy, so I cannot heal my wounds - so obviously - my head is clear - I can see everything so clearly - everything is still connected so damn badly to my past.

Possible Alternative TimeLine 1 Prognosis

failure of healing wounds => to living in the physical world

getting a job => got a job

2023: misery will set in, all the people able to become intimate and get close to me will come. Something really terrible will happen to me; I think I'll get beaten up on the streets: I gave up my umbrella - my defense.

2024 + later years: because of that trauma I will not be able to work. I'm so traumatized and disappointed in my self, I lost my job, and then I'll sit around and I'll be a burden to my parents

....

I ended up on the streets

Why would this timeline be irrational?

It seems...too much. Like is it even possible that there would be so much tragedy? - Yes, it is. 2016 and elementary school.

Are the events really interconnected so that they will cause a series of causalities? - They might or might not but something similiar already happened:

2016 - summer

many abnormaliations on the streets

crossroad

train

Japanese store toilet

Hendrich

Zeitungsobdachlosenverkäuferin

2016 - winter

abnormaliation

involvement

first classroom: that stupid question

you went to his place (bad eyes)

continued to hurt me (dann machst du etwas falsch)

this shitty project :

die Treppen gehen

presentation

trivago

bearhug

didn't see him again

2017

body and mind decayed afterwards

continuous problems

2018

small mprovements because of year of the dog

2020

extreme decay of body

fast forward

2022: you could not do it cleanly with the house property management because you had to focus on your body not decaying. Still caused many physical causalities in between.

Stop here, still tbc

two alternatives

Possible Alternative TimeLine 2 Prognosis

I succeeded in ignoring all the obstacles for now, froze them, put them into a frame (a seal) and flushed them out through a narrative. Through motion. Moving. Narratives move. And are alive.

Week 1 after Operation: nothing happened, only the good things happened. You can deal with them now, now that you're strong but they don't dare to do anything now.

Week 2: toxic stories can be written now, to rewrite the bad into something pleasurable (to lose the fear of them).

Forward in Time Probably a month or three laters: a work story, very successful.

(in between all the small things)

Unknown time, possibly six months or so: We are in China

Proof that it works: myself.

I had several, not just some, narratives that became reality.

Narratives intermixing definitely exist.

There's one definite positive fact about alternative timeline 2, though: I'll be strong enough to deal with it then.

Possibility:

Success Rate: Low, maybe...10-20%

lack of self confidence

reoccuring thoughts and fears of failure

head is hot and clouded

unable to control feelings

cluttered and too many things at once

Every rational human being - person would now say just deal with it the "normal" way but what if I said

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zabiume · 3 years

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[Orihime prompts] Even though it's pretty unpolished, I'm really fascinated with the Bleach Pilot chapter (if you haven't read it, you can find it online with minimal googling). It ends with Rukia revealing to Orihime that her homeward rights to Soul Society have been revoked because of her bad behavior and asking Orihime not to tell Ichigo "when she sees him." I often think about how it would have continued. Is Rukia able to get Orihime to Soul Society somehow(her ticket was ripped up?) or do they have to hang around Karakura together as ghost bums? How long do they actually manage to keep Ichigo in the dark? Does Orihime get powers? Will the Law eventually catch up with Rukia, and what role is Orihime going to play in all this? There are so many possibilities, it's just fun to think about, and I bet your ideas are better than mine. Do you think we could get a small dispatch from an AU Where Orihime Dies at the Beginning?

I was going to go for a fic but then I figured a meta would probably suit this ask better because I have a lot of random, loosely-related thoughts about it.

You know, the Bleach Pilot is pretty grim compared to Bleach(tm)—especially with the whole part about Orihime's dad ripping her ticket in two and denying her a chance to the afterlife (what a douche). My guess is that the story was being set up in a way where they obviously do a poor job at hiding it from Ichigo, and then Ichigo and Orihime would have to find an alternative way to enter Soul Society to a) rescue a freshly-arrested Rukia and b) send Orihime back to the afterlife.

However. Let's dial back a bit and Speculate.

Orihime’s powers were at one point completely different to what they are now, there was one version in which she would sprout horns and a tail.

I mean if you're a niche Orihime lore collector like me then you'd know that Kubo originally intended to give Orihime horns and a tail, which makes me go, "What if Orihime Hollow-fied?"

Stay with me here. The way the Pilot sets up the story is that a Hollow is either a Plus that got a) eaten or b) corrupted by staying too long, right? Given the way Orihime's ticket got torn in two, I think it would be cool if nature just took its course and Orihime turned into a Hollow. The catch here would be that Orihime being Orihime, she would actually be able to handle Hollowfication the way Vizards do (AKA with restraint and a conscience) and in-Pilot-universe, that's never happened before so now you'd have Ichigo and Rukia grappling with what happens when a soul is neither-here-nor-there. Funnily enough, I thought back to Loly and Menoly calling Orihime a monster when I was thinking about this and that would make for a perfect conflict, wouldn't it? A soul that doesn't belong with other souls, a Hollow that doesn't belong with other Hollows. Maybe the only real place she feels like she belongs is by Ichigo's side (aww), so she chooses to help him when Rukia inevitably gets arrested for the crime of being short transferring her powers. Orihime and Ichigo would have to find an alternative way to Soul Society so they can rescue Rukia (and they do) but now Soul Society won't take Orihime so she returns to the World of the Living. Maybe Ichigo is just your average cookie-cutter protagonist shinigami and Orihime is the one with weird demonic powers. Maybe, eventually, the Arrancar come to claim her and Orihime thinks, "Okay maybe I should go with them, Hueco Mundo must be my home after all" but then they start eating brains and doing weird organ puppetry and she's like, "Oh. Not my vibe."

Powers

I think Orihime should be allowed to shoot ceros.

#i can't believe they said a heroine can't have horns and a tail #you kno ichigo would have loved his demon girlfriend regardless of the fact! bleach would have done wonders for the monsterf*cker community #now i want to see a plain jane ichigo with a fork-tongued demon-eyed Orihime #ambiguous gender thoughts #asks #happy birthday hime!

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ambermoonbeanie · 2 years

Text

I have felt incomplete without some sort of post ending story so here we go:

Scott feels a hand rest on his shoulder during his new habit of walking around the empire during the night.

A voice that he knows to be his uncorrupted brother Xornoth whispers"Scott, you really need to tell us what's going on."

"Yeah Scott I can't be your boyfriend if you don't ever interact with me!"Jimmy adds just a bit too loudly.

While Xornoth shushes Jimmy Scott let's put a sigh and plops on to the snowy ground gazing at the ice spikes that had just popped up from his surprise.

Scott mutters "What is it that you two want" in a defeated tone knowing that neither of them would let him go.

"Well to start with we might as well ask why you are wandering around at night" Xornoth softly replies while sitting next to him.

Jimmy does similarly but a bit more clumsy and settles down right next to Scott and outs his head on his shoulder.

"Well, I've been wanting to see our empire without everyone treating to me" Scott replies sadly with pain in his eyes.

"Well obviously that's not the whole truth, is it!" Jimmy responds.

Scott snatches a large chunk of ice and half heartedly tossed it away and watches it shatter upon impact.

Xornoth looks Scott right in the eyes and says" You've abandoned the court on multiple occasions, you avoid your parents and Jimmy, but most of all you act afraid of me. Your not just ignoring me like you do all the time you actively try to leave the room that I am in. And most worrying of all to me is your sudden spike in magical powers. You are beating our most talented wizards without trying and this odd activity is even seeping into the minds of our citizens."

Jimmy starts to doze off and rest on Scott's lap, so the conversation is now between Scott and Xornoth.

"Well, I guess to start with we are all dead" Scott tells Xornoth with such grief and seriousness that Xornoth doesn't immediately make fun of him.

Xornoth takes a few moments to collect himself and comprehend what was just revealed to him that Scott continues with" This isn't the real world, or at least not in the way that we think of it, but it is a sort of alternate dimension-after life. You know the dwarf race that used to live up in the mountains? Well, they built a sword that could send somebody to an afterlife of their choosing and I stabbed myself with it."

"Why did you do that?" Xornoth whispers, "I mean why did you kill yourself and send you back to this life of all things. What was so bad that you committed suicide to supposedly leave that reality?"

"You know the story of Exor and Aeor, right? Scott replied.

"Yeah." Xornoth replied confusedly.

"Well long story short, we were their champions and you got corrupted and eventually to end your reign I killed myself to kill you." Scott replied," and as such I ended the cycle and came here. Another important thing is that you killed my parents at a pretty early time in my life."

A rather long silence started after Scott finished speaking only interrupted by Jimmy's breathing.

"That, well that was not what I was expecting when I came looking for you." Xornoth eventually replied." I'm guessing you fancied Jimmy in that life as well since he's right here" gesturing down at Jimmy's sleeping form. Xornoth continued "could you tell me a bit more about our fight?"

"Well at one point we thought we trapped you when Gem, Pearl, and Shubble tried to imprison you." Scott replied with a lot less stress in his voice.

"Whose Shubble?"Xornoth asks.

"Shubble is one of the last gnome that came to our world after you destroyed her homeland."

"Ah"

Sorry for the repetitive-ness, this is my first time doing one of these so yeah. I will probably expand this universe eventually so if you want me to yell at me and maybe I'll do it quicker.

#but the finale was really getting to me #empires smp #scott smajor #empires scott #esmp #empires xornoth #empires spoilers #empires

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feitania · 2 years

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If Mikey did that to Haru, how the fuck will anyone have the guts to defend his behavior after that? There is NO excuse to do that to someone. Let alone as CHILDREN. I'm not sure what the creator is going with this, unless he's saying "some people are born with sociopathic tendencies and can't be helped". Mikey is causing trouble in every timeline regardless of what Takemichi does. How can he possibly help Mikey unless he goes back in time when they're babies and drops Mikeys ass at a the steps of a mental hospital.

Oh my god -

the last sentence got me so hard I choked. Anon you're hilarious let's be friends? Please that would be the best plot twist ever.

Anyhow, ready for a ride?

So, I think at this point mikey is a very difficult discussion topic for the whole fandom because you're right - seeing mikey being this down right sociopathic (really don't like this word but I also don't want to just assign mikey a whole ass personality disorder, which he probably has but you know, we're trying to works against stereotypes here) even as a child makes people lose hope for him. And while I'd say wakui can still pull a twist and leaves us with gaping mouths and a good ending it's very hard to imagine this. So we're all left with this vague bad feeling about him but at the same time it's mikey.

Mikey who was selfless everyday to make his friends happy. How destroyed his old bike for baji's sake. Mikey who is obviously living in the past and behaves like a child because he can't move on. He is baby - no but for real he is selfish as much as he is selfless and overall he seems to have his own strong moral compas. So even when he killed south, takemichi, draken and the others we could have explained these actions as a trauma response but now? It doesn't matter what backstory we get for mikey and sanzu - mikey did something horrible as a child and seemed to not even acknowledge this in the moment. And this is concerning. Even if we would see him being somewhat affected by his family situation (having only his two siblings and his grandpa) that made him act up - doing this to a friend is and will be fucked.

But I have to say that this is takemichi we're talking about. I don't know how the others would/will react to this piece of information about mikey but knowing this loveable yet dumb and naive crybaby he will continue with his "I can fix him" attitude until he dies. Again.

Takemichi is mikey's only weak point, so I guess we might see him trying to safe crybaby no. 1 and in the process he is, idk, touched by the light of god and takemichi purifies him like the saint he is and then mikey gets a whole damn transformation and tells everyone that a demon actually possessed him and now he's free because power of friendship, or something.

Or it will be an endless circle of suffering for both of them until, let's say the other time leaper, puts an end to this. Frankly speaking I don't really know anymore but you're right and maybe you should send a letter to wakui and ask him if he might want to consider making a special with your alternative ending so people will be less sad after the end.

I would like it. Thanks for reading this if you did♡

- eris

#advisors break #fangirl therapy #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers spoiler #sano mikey manjiro #tokyorev spoilers

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punderfulowl · 3 years

Text

Top 10 Anime (That I've Seen) in 2020

Well now, it has certainly been awhile. I'm currently sitting at eight months too late for posting this, but, y'know, something something life happens. More accurately, I already made this list, but wanted to try out what response I'd get from Reddit. Turns out, they're not as cool as you guys!

Anyways, as the title states, this is not a list of my favorite anime that came out during 2020, but instead my favorite anime that I just so happen to see during that year. While it's fun to have an end of the year retrospective, I find that having a list in this format not only adds variety, but also helps bring attention to anime that might have been lost in the shuffle in previous years (I also don't have enough time to stay caught up in seasonal releases).

Honorable mentions:

Aggretsuko S3, My Hero Academia S4, Today's Menu For the Emiya Family, Interspecies Reviewers (yes, really), and I Couldn't Become a Hero So I Reluctantly Decided to Get a Job

10. Maid-Sama (2010)

In hindsight, I find it a bit funny that I wanted to watch something wholesome to kick off 2020. Anyway, Maid-Sama is about a high school girl that is also a no nonsense Class President and she kind of has to be at a school where, until recently, was an all boys school. While she kills it in academics and is good at shutting down any shenanigans from the male student body, her financial situation isn't the greatest and has to balance a job at a maid cafe along with her school-related responsibilities. She does her best to hide her employment there to keep up appearances, but is one day found out by one of the boys who happens to be a big flirt and, yeah, hijinks ensue. While this anime doesn't have too many surprises, our main leads bounce off each other well enough to keep me entertained. Nothing I haven't seen already in other anime Rom-Coms, but I think it has more than earned its place at the start of this list.

9. Haganai NEXT (2013)

It's a personal rule of mine when making these lists that I don't include sequels of shows that were in previous lists. While I DID see the first season of Haganai a couple of years ago, it didn't quite make it into the top ten at that time. Because of that, it meets the criteria for this year's list. While I found the characters were just as charming here as I did during the first season, the development of their relationships really took off. It's a shame that it will most likely not get a third season, but I'm happy with what ride this show gave me. But hey! At least I can read the light novels/manga to continue the story! Wait, nevermind, the Haganai fans on Reddit are saying that's a bad idea.

8. Engaged to the Unidentified (2014)

Based off of a Four Panel joke manga, Engaged to the Unidentified tells the story of a girl in high school suddenly getting some life changing news. As it turns out, her grandfather made an arranged engagement with her and the son of a family he knew. Next thing she knows, the boy in question, as well as his little sister, moves into her family's house! While the boy is unassuming at first, there may be more to him and his family than he lets on. Plain and simple, this anime has charmed me. There's a decent amount of drama and mystery despite the source material and I applaud it! Even though this also doesn't have much new to offer, even to the point where I would compare this to Maid-Sama, what made me pick this at the 8th spot were the color choices and animation quality. Give this a shot if you can!

7. Grimoire of Zero (2017)

It's a fantasy/adventure story starring a loli sorcerer and a huge, anthropomorphic white tiger man. I honestly can't say anything else. I won't be able to do it justice. That first sentence should intrigue you a lease a little bit. Read it, again. Please check it out. It's an underrated gem that no one is talking about.

6. ID: Invaded (2020)

Hey, here's something recent! Unfortunately, this is also not something I can say much about. There may not be too many deep characters and the secret bad guy isn't hard to figure out, but BOY is this anime cool! The best way to describe this series is that it's like the movie Inception, but instead of brain heists, it's brain murder mysteries.

5. Carole and Tuesday (2019)

A runaway rich girl has a fated meeting with an orphan and they decide to make music together...oh, this also takes place Mars. Joking aside, this show was something special with its music (a new song almost every episode no less), interesting setting (freaking Mars, dude), and endearing main cast. Shoot, the music itself would be top 3, maybe number 1, but what bogs it down is the show's second half. I can easily see myself watching this again someday, and maybe my opinion will lighten up, but for now, 5 is a dang good spot.

4. Fate/Grand Order: Absolute Demonic Front - Babylonia (2019)

Part of me hesitates placing this high up on list due to this show being animated, fan service spectacle for Fate fans. However, that hesitation is overshadowed by the fact that I am a Fate fan myself and I can do whatever I want with this list. Even if you're not a Fate fan or play FGO, if you enjoy some solid fight animation, this is worth a look.

3. K-On S1 (2009)

I'll admit it, I might regret not watching the second season then putting the series on the list as a whole, but this how I've been doing these lists and I'm such a creature of habit. There's not much I can say about K-On that hasn't already been said. By itself it's an anime classic and one of Kyo-ani's biggest properties. It's a sweet and wholesome watch, but be sure to have some insulin within reach.

2. Princess Principal (2017)

Imagine you're working with a team of programmers trying to make a mobile game then all of a sudden someone asks to make a show out of it. You know, a show with different character motivations, plot, twist and turns and all that? Most might say that's just a shameless, shallow cash grab, but it turns out okay for Princess Principal. Sure, most might summarize this anime as, "cute girls doing espionage things," but with its cast, visuals, and interesting alternative timeline, it works! Apparently there's a new season or movie in the works and I am all for it!

1. Beastars (2019)

I was not expecting this to be number one, but with much deliberation (with myself obviously) this feels right. It tells a pretty unique story while showing itself to be the exception to the rule when it comes to 3D anime.....it being that it's actually good. While I acknowledge that shows like K-On are classics and deserves to be number one on many different lists, it didn't line up with my personal criteria like Beastars did. My biggest deciding factor is: Now that I've watched this, do I want more? It's true that while I'm excited to start K-On S2, Beastars intrigues me more and ever since season two was announced, I'm looking forward to that more.

Sorry again for this list being so late, but at least the silver lining is that the next end of the year list is about four months away (in theory)!

#anime #k-on #beastars #princess principal #fate grand order #carole and tuesday #id invaded #grimoire of zero #engaged to the unidentified #haganai #maid sama

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angellesword · 3 years

Text

MAGIC SHOP | JJK (07)

Description: You and Jungkook were best friends who were in love with each other. What would happen when Soojin, your half sister who you’re trying to impress, told you she’s in love with Jungkook too?

Alternatively:

“Would you believe me if I said that I was scared of everything too?”

Genre: childhood best friends to lovers, family drama, angst, fluff, idiots to lovers, pining, slice of life au.

Pairing: Architect!Jungkook x Architect!Reader

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: homophobia (Tae’s family is insisting he can’t be gay)

SERIES: CHAPTER 6 | CHAPTER 8

CHAPTER’S OST: Fix You covered by BTS

When you try your best, but you don't succeed

You closed your eyes the moment you heard the first line of the song.

When you get what you want but not what you need

Your heart was thumping, unable to bottle up the emotions that had been eating you for months now.

One year and seven months, to be exact.

You left Seoul, your hometown, nineteen months ago.

"Why can't we just eat at home?" Taehyung groaned, clearly not happy with how things were going right now.

You shrugged because you also didn't know why Yoongi and Jimin decided to have dinner at Per Se, a fine dining restaurant, tonight.

Did they forget that you and your brother were broke? The both of you couldn't live life like you once did in Korea.

Life in the city that never sleeps was different. You still had a job, but you were no longer an architect, deciding that it was best to pursue graphic designing instead.

You worked from eight to five pm in an office now. Gone were the days you visited construction sites. What you created at your current job were images, logos and even diagrams.

When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep

You loved your job, unfortunately your compensation was not enough to keep you going, making you feel like you were:

Stuck in reverse

Your salary was barely enough to cover your rent and utilities expenses. Jimin, your roommate, knew this so he lent you his car, the same car Taehyung was driving at this moment.

You didn't want to borrow your roommate's car at first, but Jimin insisted, saying that he had a new car and that he didn't know what to do with the old one.

Jimin didn't want to sell it. He was a very sentimental person and the car was actually a gift from his parents.

So he let you use it. You were special to Jimin. He wouldn't mind that you and your brother were using something that he loved.

"Fuck it. I'm going home," Taehyung announced, suddenly turning right.

Your eyes widened, ready to scold him.

But you didn't. Now when—

And the tears come streaming down your face

—he was crying.

You gasped, but you quickly pursed your lips into a thin line. You also looked outside the window of the car, refusing to look at your brother.

You didn't want him to feel like you were prying or that you felt bad for him. No. Taehyung didn't appreciate empathy. For him, it was just the kinder version of pity.

He didn't need you or anyone to feel bad for him as it would only make him feel like his decision was wrong.

When you lose something, you can't replace

When Taehyung moved back here in New York, he lost something that he could never replace: his family in Seoul.

You remembered why your brother lost contact with the Kims. It happened almost two years ago.

"I'll just change," was your excuse so that you could get out of the dining area and also because you knew Jungkook would follow you.

You had to talk to him.

You had to remind him again not to tell anyone in your family that you and him were dating.

You thought it would only be for the meantime; however, you changed your mind after your father explained why he wanted Soojin and Jungkook to get married.

It was for Castle, the company your mother, Taemin, and Jong-in all built together.

How could you let the empire fall?

Apart from this, you saw how Soojin looked at your boyfriend. She loved him. Maybe more than you could ever love Jungkook.

When you love someone, but it goes to waste

You didn't want Jungkook's love to go to waste. You didn't deserve him. He deserved Soojin, someone who could love him dearly.

"Jungkook, as we are saying—" Sin-ae tried to open the conversation again the moment you disappeared from the scene.

Your best friend cut Sin-ae off though. You were right. Jungkook was going to follow you.

"W-Wait! Jungkook! Where are you going?" Sin-ae panicked, getting up so she could follow Jungkook.

Sin-ae could tell that this situation was starting to upset her daughter. Soojin was gritting her teeth, tears filled her eyes.

"Mom. Let Jungkook be." Taehyung said, stopping Sin-ae from running after your best friend. He just knew Jungkook's going to go to you. You and him clearly needed some time alone.

"No. I still have something to say to that boy!"

"It can wait." Taehyung clenched his fist. "I have something to say to you too. It can't wait."

"What is it?"

Taehyung had the undivided attention of his mother now. Admittedly, every member of his family was focused on him, waiting.

Taehyung gulped.

It was now or never.

"I'm gay."

Could it be worse?

Was telling his family about his sexual orientation the worst thing that could happen tonight?

Maybe.

It was the worst because he didn't think this through. It just happened. It was the only way he could think of to stop them from meddling with your relationship with Jungkook.

"You're what?" Taemin's jaw ticked, eyes turning dark as he turned to his third born son.

Lights will guide you home

Taehyung's heart skipped a beat. He was nervous but he didn't regret anything. He was certain that the truth would guide him towards light.

And ignite your bones

He would be free after this night.

"Taehyung..." Sin-ae held onto the head of the chair, grasping for support. She felt like she was going to faint.

This night was stressing her out so much.

"A-Are you sure? I-I..." Sin-ae swallowed hard. She was shaking. Soojin caressed her mother's hand.

"What if you're just confused? Have you dated women before—"

"Yes. I dated seven women. All didn't work out."

"B-But..." Sin-ae tried speaking again, however she trailed off.

Taehyung shrugged upon seeing her mother's expression. He continued eating his food as if nothing happened.

"Sorry it came out of blue. I didn't want to shock you, but seeing how this dinner turned out, I didn't really have a choice but to tell you."

"What do you mean by that?" Namjoon creased his forehead, he obviously didn't like what his younger brother was implying.

"Well, it seems to me that you all know about the engagement party, but you still didn't budge even when it's clear that Jungkook doesn't want to marry Soojin."

Taehyung shrugged before speaking again.

"I don't want to go through the same thing, I guess? I don't want you all to suddenly force me to marry some rich girl. But! If it's a rich guy, I might just agree—"

"Kim Taehyung!" Taemin's voice was like a thunder when he cut off what his third born son was saying.

And I will try to fix you

"Stop your nonsense right now!" Taemin shouted, as if it was going to fix something, as if shouting would suddenly change Taehyung's preference.

"Ouch, dad!" Taehyung pouted, clutching his chest. "Don't be mean. This is not nonsense. This is me telling you the truth about myself..."

The third born son was trying to joke around, thinking that it would at least calm his family.

"I like boys, dad. I let them do me—"

Taemin abruptly stood up. He was holding a table knife, ready to attack Taehyung.

"I said shut up!"

"Yeobo!" Sin-ae hugged her husband.

Seokjin and Namjoon stepped up too, protecting their brother.

"Father, you are overreacting." Seokjin said, hiding Taehyung behind him.

"My son tells me he's a faggot and you're telling me to calm down, huh, Kim Seokjin!?"

"There is nothing wrong with being gay, father. What's wrong is harming people just because of their sexuality." Namjoon said this, touching the hinge of his eyeglasses to stop it from slipping down his nose.

Taehyung's brothers never defied their father, but they would never stand still if Taemin did something to hurt any member of their family, except you. Seokjin and Namjoon didn't care about you.

"It's okay, hyung. You don't have to defend me." Taehyung smiled at his brothers before switching his gaze at Taemin.

"Tell me, father. If I don't 'stop this ‘nonsense,' what would you do to me?"

"I will disown you." Taemin snarled, pushing Sin-ae away from him. "You won't receive anything from me."

"Ah, you will disinherit me. I see..." Taehyung smiled, though his heart was breaking apart. "Okay, then. I will make things easier for you."

"Yah! Kim Taehyung, what are you talking about?" Soojin glared at her brother. She wanted to slap him. He was being stubborn!

"Well, father can't disinherit me, his legitimate heir, just because he wants to. But like what I've said, I'm gonna make it easy for him." Taehyung slightly raised his shoulders. "I'm disclaiming my inheritance. I'd rather be broke than have a homophobic father."

Taemin was about to attack Taehyung, but Sin-ae hugged him once more.

The corner of Taehyung's mouth quirked up as he placed his car keys and card on the table, a proof that he would not take anything from his father anymore.

"Don't worry. I will also pay back everything you spent on me since I was a child." Taehyung bowed down. "Thank you for everything. Goodbye."

And high up above or down below

You blinked back to reality after remembering the reason why Taehyung left his family. The way he told you that story made you feel like you were there when it happened.

But you weren't.

You were busy breaking your own heart.

When you're too in love to let it go

You went straight out of the mansion after mumbling an excuse to your family.

"Hey..." Jungkook followed you, grabbing your wrist.

"I told you not to tell them." You twisted your hand, a not so subtle way of asking him to let you go. His palm was hot, but it was causing you to shiver. You didn't want to be touched by him.

"I didn't—"

"You almost did." You snarled, becoming more frustrated as time passed. "You broke your promise to me."

"Tiger..." Jungkook called softly, trying to hold your hand again.

You walked away, as if you were too scared to stand closer to him. You were. You didn't trust yourself when you were around him. It was like you wanted to just bury your face in his neck. You knew Jungkook felt that way too, but he shouldn't. You shouldn't.

You were in the territory of the Kims. All of them wanted Jungkook to marry Soojin. They would most likely scowl if they saw you being intimate with your 'best friend.'

"I'm sorry..." He said, still following you.

You were headed to the garden of the mansion. No one really went here at night. There were just too many mosquitoes here.

"I won't break my promise again." He said softly. Jungkook was trying to catch your gaze.

You avoided it.

You couldn't look at him as you said "of course it won't happen again. You can't say something that isn't true anymore."

"What do you mean?"

But if you never try, you'll never know

"I'm breaking up with you, Jungkook."

"What?" He was breathless. Your cruel words knocked out the air out of him.

"You heard me." You said simply, still avoiding his gaze. Do not look at him or you'd break, you reminded yourself.

"Y-You're kidding, right?" And he still couldn't believe what was happening.

No. This couldn't be true. He just had you. He was just starting to show you how much he loved you. Why were you pushing him away again?

This wasn't fair.

"You're engaged, Jungkook. To my sister." You gritted your teeth, looking down at your feet. You could see a mosquito sucking your blood there. It hurt.

"You know I don't joke around when my sister's happiness is at stake—"

"What about your happiness?" Jungkook cut you off. And mine?

"I'm happy when Soojin is happy, when my family is happy."

"What about me?" His voice was so small when he asked this, like he was ashamed and hurt. "Am I not your family too?"

Your stomach churned. Your tears fell, you saw your teardrop hitting the mosquito sucking at your foot.

Your foot hurt. Your foot itches.

You were focusing on the wrong things. You complained about the wrong things.

Your heart hurt. But you didn't care.

Your foot. It itched.

Just what you're worth

"You are." You blurted out after a few moments of silence. Would it feel good to scratch your foot?

"That's why I'm ending this. I don't want to hurt you any further..."

You're not hurting me Jungkook was about to say this. You didn't give him a chance to speak though.

"I can't love you, Kook..."

Lights will guide you home

They said lights would guide someone home. Lights helped people see. It helped them so that they wouldn't stumble in the darkness, into something they couldn't possibly fight.

For the longest time, Jungkook believed this. He thought you were his light, guiding him—leading him towards home.

Home was supposed to be safe and it should bring comfort—this was what Jungkook longed. A home.

And ignite your bones

A home full of love, laughter—just things that would ignite his bones, that would make him thank the Maker for giving him life.

"Why not?" Jungkook managed to ask even though he was breaking inside.

All he could think about was your cruel words.

I can't love you, Kook...

It meant he was hard to love, right? He was hard to love despite the fact that he was trying his best. He was good. So good—too good, but it wasn't enough.

There was no home to come to.

Your foot still itches.

"Because I'm broken." You were stupid to think that you could fill his heart with love.

Love didn't work like that.

Jungkook shook his head violently. He knew you didn't want him to touch you, but he did.

He couldn't stop himself.

He took your face into his hands, feeling your skin. He was touching you like he was making sure you were real.

"And you can't love someone when you're broken."

His response was instant.

"Then let me try to fix you." He said this as if it was easy.

You cackled. This was better than sobbing.

"Too bad..." You finally had the courage to meet his gaze. You looked at him dead in the eyes, saying this: "Because I don't want to be fixed."

Jungkook was right.

You were his light.

You were his light, but you weren't going to guide him home.

You were the light that was going to blind him.

"Goodbye, Jungkook." You smiled.

And then you walked away.

This time Jungkook didn't follow you, but aside from this nothing else changed—well except that you weren't looking down anymore.

You looked up, remembering that when you kissed Jungkook for the first time, the moon and the stars were there to witness it.

The moon and the stars were still here.

This time they witnessed how you broke Jungkook's heart.

Damn. Your foot still itches.

#jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #ficswithluv #jungkook x reader #jungkook x y/n #armywriterssupport #jungkook x you #bts fic

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