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cchapsticck · 4 months

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A couple things:

The first album he ever owned that he got to choose on his own was Master of Reality when Wayne handed him 5 bucks at the used record store after he picked him up from foster. And he’s pretty sure Children of the Grave changed his brain chemistry. Like something in him got hard re-wired and soldered in place. Like there’s no unfixing that fix.

The first song he ever learned to play on Wayne’s old beater acoustic was Here Comes The Sun, but if anyone asks he says it was Smoke on the Water, which was actually second but the truth is possibly humiliating, considering his curated reputation.

He cannot read music. Which is funny, considering he’s had a “band” since 7th grade. He just kind of picks at shit by ear. Which he’s pretty good at, thank you very much. It's why he likes shit with solos, he can pick out a riff better than he can pick out a chord progression.

Said band did not lock down members with any kind of permanence until 10th and no one had any kind of electrified instrument until 11th because Jeff and Phil and Gareth might be better off than he is - drug money notwithstanding - but tuns out parents aren’t keen to just drop that kind of money so one’s kid can fuck around in another kid’s garage every couple weekends for that kind of price tag

Metal shows are few and far between in Roane County, considering all the ways it is. But the couple no-name bands that have breezed through town at the dive-iest of bars the county has to offer well - he doesn’t want to say, changed his life but - but he’s never been so glad to have been elbowed in the face because everyone’s having a good fucking time and without the accompanying “faggot” attached to the act, which he’s had a repeat performance of just. Generally. In his life outside of the shittest bars in Indiana.

He’s not saying Zepplin II made him gay but Robert Plant’s face pasted onto that German soldier’s body made him feel some kind of way at a formative age and that’s maybe just something he’s going to take to the grave even if apparently the shittiest of shitheads just decided that was a true thing about him on their own.

Steve Harrington has been hot since, like, junior high. Which is horseshit. Because like, first of all. He sucks. Like, he’s a douche. But Barb Holland died and he ended up in the hospital because apparently those two things are related events and rumor has it he got kicked out of his house and he shaved his head about it and there are a shocking number of scars hidden under that disco hair and that, unfortunately, does not make him less hot or less of a douche.

Another thing: Dustin Henderson is fucking annoying. Like annoying in the unremarkable way all nerds are annoying that he’s a little dead to (like sometimes he catches himself mid-tirade and thinks ‘damn, I’d kick my ass too’) so he gets it but also. He’s fucking annoying. He’s fucking annoying about Steve Harrington in particular which like. Hilarious. Go figure.

And he’s got a lot of annoying ammunition in that particular annoying gun, because apparently Harrington’s been living in his basement. So the kicked out thing is probably true. A lot of what he’s got to say is anecdotal. Lives in the basement. Pays rent. Makes dinner for Henderson’s mom. Drives him to school. Owns a bat with nails in it? Which. Alright? That makes about as much sense as anything else going on. The weirdly dense law enforcement presence in the wake of the Holland murder (and those are feds, like, he knows cops, he grew up around a lot of cops - thanks Dad - these are not cops) and the ever evolving whatever-this-is of Steve Harrington which he is for sure paying a normal amount of attention to and not unloading his guts at Gareth and Jeff who for sure don’t want to kick his ass about it because are we all seeing this shit? It's been like 5 years of high school and this is a puzzle he is no closer to solving, as he is no closer to graduating. And it's not because he’s being a dipshit about Harrington’s gradual transformation no matter what Gareth keeps insisting. (he’s being a dipshit about graduating because he’s a dipshit - separate problem)

But like, something is for sure going on with Steve Harrington. And fuck him dead because he is desperate to pick it apart. It's got nothing to do with the horny goblin in his brain barking about the, shall we say, aesthetic realignment here (which maybe, like, is coming for the integrity of his own genre cred but like. Come on, man.) and it's got everything to do with someone like Steve Fucking Harrington willfully abdicating the throne to throw himself amongst the Maligned With Problems The World Will Make Your Fault. Like he had to have known the flavor of hell people like him and Hagan and every other one of those silver spoon fucks made of his life. And not just his, just like, anyone remotely adjacent in the social order.

There’s this kind of unspoken truth at shows. Like metal, hardcore, whatever, any genre within a genre that fills up bars like this, like he’s pretty sure the punks even have this rule, this remains true: the more normal the guy looks the more fucked in the head he is. That guy is dangerous. That guy is working through some shit you cannot even begin to conceive of and this is only outlet he’s got. Like that guy will straight murder you if you come at him wrong in a pit and everyone knows it. You do not fuck with that guy. You do not make eye contact with that guy. So Steve Harrington in his tightass Levi’s and bright white fresh out the 3-pack t-shirt hugging the back wall of the Hideout on a Thursday night sure is a red flag. But red’s always been his favorite color, so-

So he buries his shoulder blades in the wall right next to him and hits him with a of all the gin joints and Steve just squints at him like he’s got no fucking clue what he’s talking about. Figures. Harrington always seemed like a philistine. Steve just runs his hand over his shaved short head, and Eddie swears he can hear the rasp of Steve’s palm over the noise of the bar.

“You come here often?” And it's not not a come on and he’s a little prepared to get decked but it's also a genuine question.

“It’s work.” Steve says, not unkindly but not really looking at him either. Like he’s not really interested in the conversation or Eddie at all.

“It’s work?”

And that gets Steve looking and he does not look impressed. It's cute. Which probably says more about Eddie’s ability to turn disdain into some semblance of private affection but we’re not going to unpack that bag we’re just going to throw the whole suitcase out.

“Well, I can’t work the bar so I just pull people out of the pit. Work the door sometimes.” Steve says over the noise of the bar, by way of explanation.

“How about that?” he says with no small amount of genuine awe. “Mall work not cutting it for you, then?”

Steve just kind of one shoulder shrugs. Not cutting it in the sense that the mall like, fuckin’ burned down but. Y’know. Speaking in kind of a general hypothetical kind of way. Looking for a new career path kind of way. Less about the mall directly. Or at all.

“Yes and no. I got punched less by skinheads at the mall.” and that almost sounds like a joke, like Harrington isn’t totally hating this conversation. Delightful.

“And you’d willingly go into this line of work when Henderson says you can’t win a fight?” he says it like he means it, like he’s actually surprised. Because he is. Because getting laid out at a show is just some shit that happens sometimes. Assholes with something to prove, the wrong guy took an elbow at the wrong time, a drunk got in the pit and doesn’t know the difference between a good time and a fight, like, shit happens.

Steve’s scrunched up face of repulsion and offense is additionally cute.

“Yeah well, Henderson says a lot of shit about you too.”

He may have been operating on the assumption that Steve actually had no idea who he was. And was just some weird guy who, for some reason, had a lot of personal information about him that was in no way reciprocated. Just kind of figured he would have been beneath Harrington’s notice in a big picture kind of way.

Fuck you, Henderson, how dare you.

“Only glowing reviews, I’m sure.”

“More or less.”

Alright he’ll take back point two, then. You’re on thin ice, Henderson.

“Is that where the uh-” and he kind of gestures limply at the pit and then towards the thick, formerly stapled up scarring in Steve’s hairline. Like he’s come home from a show with a bloody nose or a black eye or two but nothing like that.

“No.”

It's the finality in his tone, when he says it that makes him suspect he’s fucked this up and the conversation is over.

And it is.

So he hangs around the bar for the set and then he leaves and its not really all that interesting.

But he thinks about that for a while, that something rattled Steve Harrington’s cage so hard he’s this now. Somewhere in the realm of quietly fucked up, and on the edges of good sensibility and good taste because its more comfortable out of a spotlight. Even if the dark on the edge of that pool of light is more than a little dangerous, but at least there’s a place to hide.

And then Chrissy Cunningham dies on his ceiling and he has to keep hiding.

#i wrote this thing like a billion years ago when punk!steve was going around and this was the closest i could get to it #while still feeling authentic #character wise anyway idk #i think i had other plans for it but i don't remember them now #so i cleaned it up and here it is yall can have it now #prompts #steddie #steddie fanfiction #steveddie #steddie fic #stranger things #eddie munson #steve harrington #punk!steve #steddie au #stranger things fic #steve x eddie #steddie fics #i've been trying other creative outlets and just getting mad so i decided to clean up wips i figure would never see the light of day

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stephstars08 · 11 months

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Still Alive ~ Chapter Eight

Ethan Landry x Reader

Warnings: Adult Language, Violence, All Angst, Trust Issues, Blood, Weapons, Death Threats, Character Deaths, Trauma, Anxiety, Parent Issues, and BIG CLIFF HANGER! (Sorry if I forgot any!)

Word Count: 2,337

Author’s Note: Hello Everyone! I can’t believe Sunday will be the last chapter of this story! I enjoyed writing this and that’s why I mentioned about doing a second book. I’m trying to get a good plot together for you all but I know it will be awhile since I have other ideas I want to write for you all and post. This chapter has a HUGE CLIFFHANGER SO YOU ARE WARNED! Next and Final chapter will be posted on Sunday! Next Week I will be taking a break from posting since I want to catch up on writing and also update my account a little bit! Stay tunned for any updates that will be coming soon!

Y/N quickly turned around and pointed her gun at the person who called her name. “Detective Bailey?” Y/N said a bit confused and surprised to see him standing there. “Woah easy, put the gun down.” Detective Bailey told her in a calm tone. “Why are you here?” Y/N asked him in a stern tone not backing down. “I got a call to come here.” Detective Bailey told her. “Please, put the gun down.” He added but she still wasn’t budging. She remembered what her mom and Sidney told her, don’t fucking trust anyone. Before she could say anything, she saw Ghostface come running behind Detective Bailey. “WATCH OUT!” Y/N called out going to shoot Ghostface but before she could pull the trigger Detective Bailey kicked her in the stomach making her drop the gun. Y/N fell to the floor holding her stomach while Detective Bailey grabbed her gun and pointed it at her.

“What the?” Y/N said trying to catch her breath again confused and surprised by what Detective Bailey just did. “Surprise Y/N.” Detective Bailey said as his lips turned into an evil smirk. “Nice job, kid.” He said to Ghostface. “What?” Y/N said looking between Ghostface and Detective Bailey as she continued to hold her stomach that she knew is starting to bruise. Detective Bailey gave Ghostface a nod. The person took off the mask to reveal Quinn which made Y/N’s eyes go wide.

“Heyyy, Y/N.” Quinn said in a teasing tone as she waved her knife at her. “How? You fucking died!” Y/N said in complete shock. “Kinda, didn’t.” Quinn said looking over at her dad as she took off her black gloves. “Why are you two doing this?” Y/N asked them in a stern tone. “Because your bitch of a friend killed my son.” Detective Bailey answered her with a dark look in his eyes. At first Y/N had no idea what the fuck he was talking about till it hit her. “You two are Ritchie’s family.” Y/N said looking between Quinn and Detective Bailey with a surprised look in her wide eyes. “Look at that, the bitch is smart.” Quinn hissed glaring at Y/N with disgust.

“We will get our revenge on Sam but first I need to kill you to get my other son on our side. I know him finding out about you would make him let out his dark side seeing how much he cares about you. You were first on my list, but of course you made me do something I didn’t want to do.” Detective Bailey told her with anger in his tone. “What the fuck are you talking about? I didn’t make you do anything!” Y/N said defending herself getting frustrating and annoyed. “Quinn.” Detective Bailey said to her. Quinn walked out of the room for a couple minuet and then came back holding Ethan.

“Ethan!” Y/N said standing up on her feet but before she could step towards him Detective Bailey grabbed her. “Woah, where do you think you’re going?” Detective Bailey taunted her holding her tightly. He had her back pressed up against his chest. “Glad you could finally join the fun, son.” Detective Bailey said to Ethan which made Y/N’s heart rate speed up. “Son?” Y/N said looking at Ethan with confusion in her eyes. It hurt Ethan to have Y/N find out this way. To be honest, he didn’t want her to find out the truth to protect her. He also thought if she knew the truth, she would want nothing to do with him. “Tell her! Tell her your big secret!” Detective Bailey told his youngest child in a demanding tone. “No!” Ethan hissed glaring at his dad with a dark look in his brown eyes that was actually scaring Y/N. She’s never seen that darkness in his eyes but when she did it made her think about the dark eyes that were in Ritchie’s eyes which helped her connected the dots. “TELL HER OR I’LL BLOW HER FUCKING BRAINS OUT!” Detective Bailey threatened gripping Y/N tighter which made her groan out in pain. He put the barrel of the gun to Y/N’s temple making her shake in fear. “NO!” Ethan yelled as he struggled against Quinn’s tight grip on him. “Then, I would start fucking talking!” Quinn hissed in a warning tone as she put her knife against her brother’s throat.

“My real last name isn’t Landry, it’s Kirsch.” Ethan confessed looking away from Y/N’s strong gaze. “You’re Ritchie’s brother.” Y/N said in a surprised tone as she started as him with glassy eyes. He’s told her everything, but it didn’t cross his mind to tell her that he’s related to the guy who was dating the psycho chick that murdered her dad. But it all started to come together though. He looks like Ritchie, but I guess her feelings for him pushed those thoughts away. She wanted to forget about Ritchie because of everything he put Sam through.

“He’s also helping us.” Quinn said with an evil smirk. “What! No, I’m not!” Ethan snapped as he quickly looked over at Y/N. As he looked into her eyes, he knew she didn’t know who to believe since her feelings were all over the place. “Y/N, I am not a killer! You know I would never hurt you or the people you love. Please believe me!” Ethan begged her as his eyes started to water up. “Y/N, I lo- “Ethan started to tell her, but Quinn cut him right off by stabbing him in the back multiple times with her knife. “NO!” Y/N screamed at the top of her lungs as she watched Quinn throw Ethan to the floor.

Y/N somehow got out of Detective Bailey’s tight hold so she could get to Ethan, but she didn’t go far because Detective Bailey shot her in the side knocking her down to the floor. Y/N let out a painful yell as she held her bleeding side. She looked over at Ethan who was lying on his side breathing heavily. She started to crawl over to him but got stopped by Detective Bailey putting one his feet onto her back. “What’s the matter Y/N? You should know how we are feeling and why we are doing this.” Detective Bailey said to her in a taunting way. “You got revenge on Amber for killing your father so now we’re going to get revenge on Sam for killing Ritchie.” Detective Bailey added which made her crawl in her skin. “Fuck you!” Y/N hissed in pain. “Wow, good comeback.” Quinn said with a scoff as she looked between Y/N and her brother. “Did you really think that I wanted to stab my only brother! Another reason why we should fucking kill you!” Quinn hissed glaring down at Y/N with fire in her eyes and pointing her bloody knife at Y/N. It made Y/N furious how they are blaming her for what’s happening to Ethan. No wonder he wanted nothing to do with this fucked up family. “Enough talk! Now be reunited with your daddy.” Detective Bailey hissed pointing the gun at the back of her head again.

“Hey dipshit!” Y/N heard a voice call out. She felt Detective Bailey’s foot off her back. When she looked behind her, she saw Sam fighting Detective Bailey. She turned back around to see Kirby fighting against Quinn. Y/N locked her eyes on Ethan who still hasn’t moved. Y/N ignored the pain in her side as she continued to crawl the rest of the way to him. She cared more about him than she did herself. When she finally got to him, he was groaning in pain. “Ethan, stay with me.” Y/N said to him as she put one of her hands onto his cheek. “Don’t worry about me.” Ethan told her in a weak tone. “What?” Y/N asked him in confusion. “Go help Sam and Kirby. I’ll be fine.” Ethan told her as his voice got softer with every word that was coming off his lips. They heard a painful scream.

When Y/N looked up she saw Kirby laying on the floor with Quinn hovering on top of her pulling her knife out from Kirby’s side. Y/N looked around the room for Sam, but she was nowhere to be seen, same as Detective Bailey. “Shit!” Y/N hissed as she looked around for something to use as a weapon. “Y/N!” Ethan said getting her attention pointing over to a brick. Y/N grabbed the brick and quickly ran over to Quinn hitting her in the head as hard as she could knocking her away from Kirby. Quinn stood up and held her now bleeding head.

“You psychotic bitch!” Quinn hissed glaring at her with dark eyes. “Speak for your fucking self!” Y/N hissed back. Quinn ran over to her and start swinging her bloody knife at her, but Y/N kept blocked the silver blade with the brick. “I don’t know what you fucking see in Ethan. He’s always been a fucking disgrace to the family.” Quinn snapped at her. “Why? Because he’s not a fucking killer like your neglective father and pussy ass older brother.” Y/N snapped back sticking a nerve on Quinn. “SHUT YOUR WHORE FUCKING MOUTH” Quinn yelled out in anger pushing Y/N into one of the glass cases which earned her a hit to the mouth by the brick when Y/N threw it at her. Y/N hit her bleeding side against a glass case making her drop to her knees and groan out in pain.

When Y/N hit her with the brick she dropped her knife and fell to her knees. The knife landed near Ethan, so he used all his strength to get to his knees and grab the knife. He crawled towards Quinn and stabbed her in the back like she did to him making her yelp in pain. Because of how weak he was she was able to grab the knife back and overpower him. Quinn stabbed him in the side making him yell out in and fall back down onto the floor.

“Hey, Quinn!” Y/N called out to her. Quinn turned around to see Y/N pointing the gun Kirby gave to her earlier with Sam standing beside her. While Ethan was distracting Quinn, Sam finished Detective Bailey grabbing the gun back and giving it to Y/N so she could finish Quinn. “Your daddy just reunited with your man baby of a brother.” Sam said in a baby tone taunting Quinn. Quinn started to scream as she charged towards Y/N with her bloody knife. Y/N shot Quinn right through the forehead killing her instantly. Quinn fell straight to the floor. “Always got to shoot them in the fucking head.” Y/N hissed remembering the advice her dad and Sidney gave her tossing the gun onto the floor.

“I got Kirby, you get Ethan.” Sam said quickly, running over to Kirby. Y/N rushed over to Ethan noticing his new stab wound on the side was just spilling blood. “Fuck!” Y/N hissed putting both hands onto his side to help stop the bleeding. “Y-Y/N” Ethan stuttered looking at her with pain in his drained brown eyes. His eyes were also hooded because he was using the all the strength, he had to keep them as open as he could. “Shh, don’t talk. It’s all going to be okay.” Y/N hushed him trying to stay as calm as she could. “You’re going to be alright. We’re going to get you help.” Y/N reassured him but was also reassuring herself as well. “I-I-I c-can’t.” Ethan stuttered in pain. “Yes, you can!” Y/N told him as hot tears filled her eyes.

She’s not going to let Ethan die. Out of all the hell she’d been going through these past couple of days he was the one that was right by her side and helped her through it. He’s her safe place. She’s not going to let his family win. This is exactly what they wanted. They wanted her to feel pain. They wanted her to feel guilty for what they did to him. They wanted her to blame herself just like Sam was blaming herself for everything that has happened.

“I need t-to tell y-y-you.” Ethan stuttered, not being able to finish the sentence he was trying to speak due to the pain taking over his whole body. “You can tell me after we get out of here.” Y/N said taking one of her hands off his side and putting it against his wet cheek that was mixed between sweat and tears. They both had tears rolling down their faces, but Y/N was wiping his away with her bloody hand that had a mixture of her blood and his all over it. She started to panic when she felt his body start to go limp.

“No, no, no.” Y/N said in panic. “Ethan, stay with me.” She told him but his face was starting to lose color. Her heart was dropping as his eyes were starting to close. “No, please keep your eyes open.” Y/N cried putting both hands back onto his side putting as much pressure as she could. She couldn’t feel her body at all because of how scared she was for him. She didn’t even feel the pain in her side that was still bleeding. All that was on her mind was him. “ETHAN!” Y/N screamed out as she continued to hold onto his limp body. Paramedics quickly made their way over to her after they helped Kirby onto a stretcher. Sam was going to follow Kirby but saw that the paramedics were having a hard time pulling Y/N away from Ethan. Sam ran over to Y/N and used all of her strength to pull her away from Ethan’s lifeless body. “NO!” Y/N screamed out as she finally let Sam hold onto her so the paramedics could aid to Ethan. “They got him.” Sam reassured her by pulling her into a hug. Y/N cried as she watches them work on Ethan who she was scared that was gone.

*Tags*

@sweetirilly @aqellano @igotmajordaddyissues @athenalive @hotweeb @ghostlyboiii @marshallowy @callsignwidow @rolly-polly-molly

(IF YOUR NAME IS CROSSED OUT IT IS BECAUSE TUMBLR WOULDN’T LET ME TAG, SORRY!)

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metroid-fusion · 1 year

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I AM TRYING TO IDENTIFY A MEME MASHUP FROM 2018 (or earlier)

aka the mreligion_set01 post

in 2018 someone i knew sent me a song someone they knew made. it was a 12 minute long meme mashup and it was really impressive. ive had this file on my computer for 5 years and ive listened to it so much but the problem is that i have no idea who the fuck made it or whether it's ever been posted online anywhere. i may very well be one of the only people thats ever heard this song. PLEASE try and help me identify it.

unfortunately. i am NOT going to post it here. because it is not mine and i cannot properly give credit. HOWEVER i am going to post a TRACKLIST because it is a distinctive tracklist that will help in identifying it.

this thing is 12 minutes 10 seconds, or maybe 12 minutes and 9 seconds. it's MAYBE associated with siivagunner somehow because it has siivagunner memes in it. i dont know all the songs in it but i listed the majority of them

track list IN ORDER below the cut (sorry for inserting opinions into it i just really like this mashup)

snow halation casin by glue70 (reposted in the wrong neighborhood) we are number one all star boulevard of broken dreams gary come home from spongebob shelter porter robinson accidentally in love from shrek 2 679 by fetty wap closer chainsmokers in the air tonight witchcraft by pendulum live and learn numb linkin park one week barenaked ladies zedd clarity Vagrant Counting Song of Retrospection from Kirby Planet Robobot (THIS SONG IS THE BASE FOR SIIVAGUNNER REBOOTED) ocean man take on me blurred lines by robin thicke welcome to the black parade the man by aloe blacc smooth we are number one bonetrousle purple lamborghini from suicide squad [this bridge dates this song heavily] waters of nazareth chip da ripper freestyle with interior crocodile alligator sample of joel saying "GRAND DAD. FLEENTSTONES?" dk rap down with the sickness ghostbusters crank that soulja boy gangnam style i play pokemon go every day (pg song for kids) by misha the nutshack [end of bridge] reeses puffs rap (on top of waters of nazareth) let the bodies hit the floor cruel angel's thesis uptown funk YMCA village people wild wild west will smith rhythm heaven ringside (POSEA FOR THE FANS) tunak tunak tun kahoot theme gentleman psy pen pineapple apple pen feel good inc gorillaz nutshack theme boombastic by shaggy panda swimming pools drank by kendrick lamar forever by drake et al goodbye to a world porter robinson [editors note. this part of this mashup is really fucking good. i need to find out who made this shit because it rules so hard] shooting stars bag raiders, snow halation, carry on my wayward son. 21 guns green day lord of the game death grips ignition remix r kelly cinema (skrillex or whoever) i dont care charli xcx scatman CAAAAAAARRY OOOOOONNN of welcome to the black parade TAAAAAAKE ONNNNN MEEEEEEE space oddity by davie bowie through the fire and flames dragonforce king of carrot flowers part 2 by neutral milk hotel spider-man 2 pizza theme mamma mia abba [reprise of a bunch of songs from the intro <3<3<3] fireflies by owl city

NOTABLE: THIS MASHUP DOES NOT HAVE MEGALOVANIA IN IT

&so with that i say please find this mashup and send it to me and listen to it

#this post might b a little silly but thats ok #a511ff #mashup #siivagunner #silvagunner #<-people in these tags will be more likely to know how to look for this shit

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morimementa · 11 months

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Guns Blazing.

Adrian is kidnapped by vengeful drug dealers and tortured in a manner similar to Goff's tactics. But unlike last time, there's nothing to stop Peacemaker from going all out. They find out in short order that Adrian's faith in him wasn't misplaced.

Fanfic under the Read More.

They were going to find him.

That’s what Vigilante tells himself as he stands maskless before the vengeful drug dealers that kidnapped him. Their leader gives some stupid speech about blood and payback and an eye for an eye, but Adrian isn’t listening. He’s more concerned with the jumper cables they’ve clipped to him. The handful of blows he’s received from their fists are nothing compared to what a car battery can do, he knows that from experience. Finally, the man he’s taken to calling Dickless the Tattooed fuckhead stops talking. Before Adrian can get in a retort about limp wristed punches, Dickless Fuckhead tuns the battery on. The only thing that he can manage as agony floods his body is a scream.

When he wakes, arms numb from being chained above his head for so long, muscles still tensing at random intervals, the first thing he hears is screaming. But it’s not his. He opens his eyes to see Peacemaker, complete with Sonic Boom helmet and dual wielding guns laying waste to the room. It is, unequivocally, one of the hottest things he’s ever seen. It’s not the concussion that makes his eyes blur as Adrian realizes all this is being done for him. As the final mook falls, Peacemaker catches him halfway to the ground and retrieves the key to his chains from the man’s pocket. He lets the body go where it lands with a thump and turns to Adrian.

“You look like shit,” His words are tinted with rage, as though he wants to pick someone and give them an extra kick in the balls for good measure. Adrian smiles, touched by his concern. It turns to a pained grimace halfway.

“They didn’t cut anything off at least.”

Peacemaker crosses the room and unlocks him. Adrian’s arms fall to his sides and he winces as pins and needles flood them. “Fuck.” He mutters, injecting as much frustration as he can into a single syllable.

“Yeah, no kidding,” despite everything, Chris is beaming. There’s relief on his face, like a man reaching the end of a long journey, though Adrian knows he’s only been missing a day.

“Can you walk?”

“Yes,” Adrian says as his legs give out.

Chris catches him halfway down, one arm supporting his back, one arm looping under his knees. He pulls him into his arms as Adrian goes limp, weak with exhaustion and alleviated stress. It’s just like how he carried Harcourt and it feels as warm and soothing as he’d imagined. He can dimly hear Chris talking to someone through an earpiece and feel the air move as he’s carried outside. As the sunlight blazes into his eyes, he closes them, content to rest again now that he's safe.

He knew they’d find him.

#Vigilmaker #fanfiction #Peacemaker #shipping #whump #hurt/comfort #short fiction #flash fiction #Christopher Smith #Vigilante #Adrian Chase

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skyetenshi · 5 months

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Die drei ??? Kids. Folge 3: Invasion der Fliegen.

Sehr viele Fliegen im jonas'schen Haus. Okay irgendwas totes ist im Haus der Jonas. Und es sind nicht Justus' Kindheitsträume.

Ich hab bei den ersten beiden Folgen vergessen zu erwähnen, dass Justus ständig lügt vor allem vor seinen Zieheltern. Like er lügt literally in jeder Szene mit ihnen. In der dritten Folge ist es zwar nicht mehr ganz so hart aber ich glaub nicht, dass das lange anhält. Außerdem muss die Zielgruppe ja was lernen. Nämlich immer die Eltern anzulügen.

Es geht zu einem Wurstfabrikanten und ich sehe schon den Gammelfleischskandal neu aufgerollt werden. Yey.

Übrigens machen Bob und Peter Witze darüber dass man Justus zu Dosenwurst verarbeiten könnte. Das soll scheinbar lustig sein?

Die Wurst Fabrik hat angeblich die beste Wasseraufbereitungsanlage, die es gibt und sogar das Spülwasser der Toiletten soll zu Trinkwasser gereinigt werden.

Die haben eine Kläranlage in der Wurstfabrik? Wer möchte da nicht gerne seine Salami kaufen...? Und gesetzliche Auflagen sind bestimmt gar kein Thema...

Scheinbar wird doch nichts gereinigt in der Fabrik, Überraschung, deswegen die Fliegenplage, aber die Jungs wollen das beweisen indem sie etwas in der Toilette runterspülen und dann ungefiltert in der Kanalisation wieder finden. Ich weiß nicht, ob so Abwasserrohre funktionieren sollten. Wer dafür seinen Arm in die Toilette stecken muss wird vom SCHICKSALSWÜRFEL entschieden. Das war also vor der Zeit in der Justus einfach Peter befohlen hat solche Dinge zu tun. Trotzdem entscheidet sich der SCHICKSALSWÜRFEL, dass es Peters Aufgabe ist. Ich will jetzt nicht sagen, ich vermute der SCHICKSALSWÜRFEL ist gezinkt aber naja ich denke es zumindest. Der könnte eigentlich auch mal bei den Teendetektiven wieder ins Spiel kommen. Am Ende haben wir eine schöne Auflösung dank Chekhov's gun, dem Diktiergerät während des Villainmonologs.

Folge 4:

Es gibt eine Stunt Shot für einen Film, der auf dem Schrottplatz gedreht werden woll. Für sage und schreibe 2000$. (Kein Wunder, dass die Jonas am Existenzminimum leben, wenn die sich so dermaßen überrumpeln lassen. Die konnten für mehrere Tage ihren Schrottplatz nicht richtig für Kunden öffenen und fast wäre auch noch einiges abgefackelt oder explodiert... das ist wild. Ich finde es auch ein wenig seltsam, dass Justus sehr an dem Dreh interessiert ist, aber mit keiner Silbe seine eigene Vergangenheit beim Film erwähnt wird. auch wenn er bei den kleinen Strolchen nichts mit Autostunts zu tun hatte, wüsste er doch eigentlich wie es an einem Set abgeht und was alles in Vorbereitung und Ablauf getan werden muss. Genauso wenig wird erwähnt, dass ja auch Peters Vater beim Film ist und Peter zumindest geringfügig Ahung über den Ablauf haben sollte.

Sie lernen einen Stuntman kennen und er erklärt ihnen, dass man als Stuntman jedes Risiko so gut wie möglich vermeidet und immer Respekt vor der Gefahr haben muss.

Ich finde das beschreibt ziemlich gut was Peter später alles treiben wird. Nur leider hat Peter den Teil vergessen in dem der Stuntman erklärt, dass man alles durchdenken und proben muss.

Ich hab ein bisschen gehofft, dass Peter vielleicht in der Zukunft Stuntman wird aber dann sieht er diese Folge nur was alles schief gehen kann und jetzt kann man ihm es wirklich nicht verübeln.

Als sie zusammen nach Hollywood fahren finden die Jungs frischen Asphalt. In diesen drücken sie ihre Fußabdrücke und schreiben noch drei Fragezeichen dazu. Wie lustig wäre es, wenn die irgendwann als große Fragezeichen damit einem Klienten vorbeikommen und. Der Klient ist so "oh schaut mal auch drei feagezeichen und sehr kleine Füßabdrücke... Wie lustig." Und die drei Jungs ziehen ihn mit allen Kräften weiter und lenken mit allem ab.

Justus ruft Reynolds an und sagt: "Wir brauchen ihre Hilfe hier geschehen seltsame Dinge."

Reynolds verspricht sofort zu kommen.

Alter was ist passiert, dass das später einfach nicht mehr der Fall war? Just hat nichts erklärts und trotzdem einfach so ja klar ich komme sofort kein Thema

Folge 5 Es geht um Zeitreisen und anscheinend weiß Peter einfach wie theoretisch Zeitreisen funktionieren, mit wie viel lichtgeschwindigkeit man dafür bräuchte, warum das nicht möglich ist und so weiter. Ich finde das so schön, dass er einfach eine kompletten Überblick hat, vor allem vor dem Hintergrund, dass das immer noch peter ist, der sonst halt nichts blickt. Scheinbar ist Peter irgendwo zwischen drei Fragezeichen Kids mit drei Fragezeichen tierisch auf den Kopf gefallen sein und dann einfach dumm geworden sein oder so ich weiß auch nicht.

Und für heute muss ich aufhören mit den Folgen, das kann ch mir nicht zulange geben.

#die drei fragezeichen #die drei ???

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awesomerextyphoon · 4 years

Text

Charred Briar Roses - 3

Curse’s Broken, Now What?

Summary: The title speaks for itself.

Parings: Orc!Bucky x Black!Reader, Orc!Steve x Black!OFC, Orc!Sam x Black!OFC

Word Count: 4,136

Warnings: Implied Smut and Some Violence

A/N: This was longer than I anticipated. Also, the princesses would be a US size 14/15. I totally forgot to mention that earlier. Sorry about that. Enjoy!

Back to Masterlist

Instead of spending 600 years in total darkness, you communicated with your sisters in a pretty well constructed dream version of the palace. You thought of new inventions and fighting moves, reconciled with Ghada about your fight the day of the curse, and kept analyzing what happened in the north west tower.

If felt like you were in the dream world for about a month.

You were talking with your sisters about trivial childhood memories when all of you felt arms around your bodies. Your surroundings started to fade and so did your sisters.

You felt chapped yet soft lips kiss your neck and lips. It was surprisingly nice, like a dream.

You opened your eyes and realized three things: Someone was actually kissing you, you weren’t in the tower, and the person kissing you wasn’t the prince that your mother had all but assured you but an admittedly hot (albeit ruggedly, your core notes) orc-human hybrid.

You and your sisters screamed.

You immediately try to push him away but he wouldn’t budge. That scared you because both you and your sisters could bench about five tons thanks to Doireann, the war fairy who blessed and trained you in combat since the age of three.

You punched him with a right jab once he broke for air. Couldn’t even get him off the bed.

He chuckled and rubbed his strong jaw and said what seemed to be a compliment in Orcish as you nursed your knuckles.

“I said that you’re quite feisty for a human princess.” He repeated in Common Tongue.

You saw that your sisters had similar reactions to their kissers. Fumnanya even threw a shoe at the one that would be later called Sam. The others got a laugh out of it.

After everyone settled down, we shared our names while you were trying not jump Bucky, the warrior who kissed you.

“So, I was wondering, do you know what year it is?” Fumnanya inquired in a mousy tone that she uses with strangers.

Steve was it, yeah Steve rubbed the back of his head, “How to put this. You’ve been asleep for 600 years. Just about everyone thinks you’re a myth. Hell, we wouldn’t have believed it if we weren’t right in front of you.”

He then provided updates on what happed after your birthdays, but you were only half listening. Your dumb fight with Ghada and your damn curiosity cost you and your sisters your friends, family, and life.

You wanted to cry, but Ghada motioned you to join her and Fumnanya in a huddle. You spoke in Nephrashim as to not alert the warriors.

The three of you knew that Sophronius was up to no good and it was odd that he was still alive since the average lifespan was 300 years due to the Nephrashim Crystal.

“We need to convince them to take us outside of the city since I’m guessing the spell Etna put on us to keep Y/N from skipping class is still in place.”

You rolled your eyes at Ghada snide comment.

“We take what need in whatever storage device Y/N has in her ‘secret workshop’!” Fumnanya chimed in.

“Hey-“

“We all knew where it is, sis. You’re not fooling anyone.” Ghada deadpanned while you huffed in frustration.

With that, the three of you rejoined the group and offered to show them around after you changed your clothes.

–––––––––––––––––––––

The warrior trio was waiting outside the room for 20 minutes when you and sisters finally emerged from behind the doors. The three of you wore much more comfortable clothing than the extravagant kaftans you wore in your sleep. The clothes also showcased more of your curves and sleek muscles they noted.

“What would you like to do first?” You asked. No sooner had you finished the question that the warrior trio’s stomachs growled like a lion’s roar.

Ghada giggled and together, you led the trio to the main banquet hall.

You and your sisters had a hunch that the food from your 18th birthday celebration was still good. Your hunch was right.

–––––––––––––––––––––––––

The hall was filled with food for 900 people. The tables were packed with: huge slabs of Gararagator Steak, roast beef and pork, fried chicken, smoked turkey, grilled and baked fish in sweet brown sauces, curries, pastas, thick stews, enticing side dishes, rich pastries/desserts, and caskets of mead and wine.

The warriors were drooling at the sight and aromas of the feast. So, when Ghada casually said to dig in, they devoured ALL of the food in record time.

You and your sisters managed to get some of the food before it was gone. None of you would admit it, but the three of you were turned on by the ferocity at which they ate and drank.

Once they finished the food and drink, the warrior trio leaned back in their chairs and sighed while they rubbed and patted their bellies followed by a couple of loud, brassy burps and belches.

Fumnanya asked them some trivial questions about life since the curse was activated which they answered in kind, but they got tense when she asked about their mothers.

Ghada, ever the politician, quickly changed the subject by asking if they would like a bath and one of the guest rooms to sleep in for the night.

Bucky was about to respond when you suddenly challenged him to a duel.

A couple of things happened: Fumnanya put her head in her hands, Ghada groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose, Sam and Steve burst into laughter, and Bucky accepted with a chuckle.

You led the group to the sparring grounds on the western end of the palace grounds.

Ghada set the ground rules: each combatant may choose a weapon from the low-level, non-lethal weapons closet and the fight could last no longer than 30 minutes.

You both chose Bo Staffs and bowed to start the spar. It took a few minutes of sizing each other up before making the first move. The duel consisted a flurry of punches, kicks, precision strikes with your Bo Staffs, and near hits/misses.

It ended when Bucky spotted a weakness in your left mid-section and landed a hit right above left hip causing you to fall. He then pinned you down before you could grab your weapon with his face two inches above yours.

The two of you were so engrossed in your own little world that Steve had to clear his throat a few times to get your attention.

–––––––––––––––––––

Sensing the, ahem, tension in the area, Ghada suggested that you all finally head over to the baths.

Except for you and Bucky, you took him to your ‘secret workshop’. Something about the way he examined some of the weapons fascinated you and you wanted to explore that.

Bucky was quite dazzled by your variety of inventions like your solar battery, your new hover bike engine, and your 5th attempt at your waning swan (a cross between a scythe and a machine gun). He was examining a pair of your laser blasting gauntlets when you asked if he’d seen some of them before.

“Is there something you like?” you asked while he picked up an old prototype for a flash grenade.

Bucky chuckled, “It’s just that I’ve never seen so many inventions in one place before. When I was an orcling, there was these traveling ‘magician’ who performed feats of wonder for the kids in the village near our settlement. In reality, he was a con artist, but we didn’t care. He would always make our lives seem a little bit brighter. One day, the three of us went behind his tent and found all these contraptions in boxes or on the ground. Tuns out, they were relics of the long gone Nephrashim people. Well, maybe not so long gone now.”

He chuckled to himself again almost bitterly. “I was always entranced by what he would show us and, when he finally fessed up to using relics instead of magic, the contraptions he would use to perform such acts. Sometimes I would wonder what it would’ve been like to live a different life; one where I could’ve been a tinkerer instead of a warrior. Don’t get me wrong, I like being one. It’s just that-”

“You wished you had more options.” You finished noticing how delicately he was holding one of your mithril tools. He held it in a deftness that most of the artisans you’ve met couldn’t match.

His confession of sorts gave you pause.

You always hated how almost everyone gave your sisters praise for their interests and demeanor while you were usually belittled when your parents and Fae tutors weren’t around. They always complained about you not being as sociable as Ghada or as ‘sweet’ (quiet, but not really) as Fumnanya. You were always seen as causing trouble, but you just saw the world differently.

Some days you actually hated being a princess and wished you had a different lot in life.

Maybe this warrior understood you.

Taking another look at him, you realize that underneath this ruggedly delicious beef cake was someone who might’ve been something else altogether. Sure, he seemed proud of his accomplishments when you both were in the dining hall, but part of you wondered what could’ve been his path if he had someone who would’ve taken the time and maybe given him an apprenticeship or something.

You bit your lower lip as you mustered up the strength to ask, “I was wondering, I think I have something I was working on before the curse was cast. Would you like to help with it? I mean, you don’t have to-”

“Yeah, that’d be nice.”

The two of you spent the next two hours working on a few prototypes. Bucky asked you questions about engineering and mechanics especially and you were more than happy to answer. It was nice to have someone outside your sisters, parents, and Fae tutors actually give a crap about what you liked. Neither you nor Bucky realized the distance shrinking in between the two of you until all you could think about was how inviting his lips and neck looked.

Unfortunately, your slowly intimate moment was dashed when Ghada interrupted them via communication mirror telling them to take a bath and go to bed already.

With an annoyed tsk, you took off your work apron, your goggles, and your gloves and motioned Bucky to do the same.

You led him to the baths, a wide yet indoor place with vast pools, man-made hot springs, and an indoor waterfall.

Looking at Bucky your feelings of embarrassment and shame arose once again. Did your ancestors really had to be this obnoxious in flaunting their wealth?

You offered to assist Bucky in washing his hair, but really you wanted to run your hands over his exposed skin.

With his nod of acceptance, you took him to changing rooms and you changed into a Soft Wrap Halter Bikini Top and Rene Fold Bikini Bottom in pale gold, the one that caused a prominent lord to walk into a compost cart due to how well it showcased your curves. Hopefully, it would work on Bucky.

You felt bad using your looks to get Bucky to make a move, but you were so sure that it would be a disaster if you moved first.

The slight shame you felt with your bathing suit quickly faded when you saw Bucky emerge from his changing room.

You cursed yourself because he was only in a loincloth, and DAMN he looked fine! Part of his long hair was pulled back in a high man bun, his shin was a beautiful smooth muted yellow-green with aqua undertones, he was powerfully built with massive shoulders (you thought the lightweight armor did most of the heavy lifting), chiseled pecs, abs, and thighs that you could’ve sworn the finest of Fae craftsmen had a hand in creating all wrapped in someone that actually engaged you both intellectually and emotionally.

You know your mother said that you and your sisters would most likely married princes, but you were glad that she wasn’t here to see you shamelessly lust over an orc. You still missed her, but both she and half of your tutors would have a conniption if they saw what you were doing right now.

It would seem that Bucky was sizing you up as well judging by the way his eyes were beginning to blow out with lust.

He must have pushed his naughty thoughts aside. “Are you still gonna wash my hair?” he queried with a smirk that showed off his tusks. They would’ve been intimidating, but now they look endearing and sexy.

You let out an uncharacteristic giggle and told him to wait right there while you went to the closet where the servants kept the washing items and got him silver spruce, lemongrass, rosemary, and orange scented shampoos and oils.

You returned to find Bucky trying and failing to put a towel tower that one of maids used to construct. Stifling a laugh, you took his hand and guided him to one of the hot springs.

–––––––––––––––––––––––––––

Bucky groaned upon sinking into the refreshing warm spring, glad to not have to was in a stream or river for a change (the tubs back home were nice, but they’re nothing compared to this). The water eased his tense muscles and joints in all the right places. Plus it didn’t hurt that the spring was deep enough for him to completely submerge himself which, at 8’ 3”, is no easy feat.

The engineering princess was getting ready to wash his hair like she offered and Bucky couldn’t wait. She had to know what she was doing to him. Lesser men would’ve jumped her on sight, but not him. His stepmother and sisters made sure of that.

She poured some of the argan and peppermint shampoos into a bowl and grabbed a towel to rest her shins.

“Lay your head on top of this bowl while I wash your head. Okay?”

Bucky did as directed and she started to work her magic on him. She started slow, working front to back, appreciating the way she gently massaged his scalp. At times he would let out low groans of pleasure at her ministrations, craving more from her.

Once she was done with the shampoo, she carefully lifted his head, emptied and refilled the water basin, and steadily poured the warm water over his head while trying not to get water up his nose.

Bucky turned around to see her beaming at her work. He smiled coyly at her pride, “Aren’t you coming?”, while motioning his right hand in a ‘come hither’ gesture.

She shook her head while biting her lower lip, probably not wanting to hair wet or some other prissy princess thing that was engrained into her.

Bucky decided to help ‘break’ her of that mindset by quickly grabbing her arm and gently tossed her into the spring in front of him. She jumped out of the water with a gasp and playfully punched his left shoulder.

“What was that for?!”

“You were too prideful and uptight!” Bucky chortled while she looked away failing to hide her embarrassment. He stopped laughing when he saw the beginnings of tears in her eyes.

He then reached out and softly lifted her head with his fore and middle fingers. She looked a bit anxious when he closed the distance between them.

“May I?” he pleaded, desperate for her to say yes.

“Please,” she whispered.

That was all Bucky needed to hear.

He started slow as to make up for this afternoon, but he almost lost it when she grasped his hair and licked his canines/tusks. He growled as her petite tongue entered his near monstrous mouth, her light moans and whimpers goading something that Bucky thought he would never feel: love, lust, and passion.

Ever since he and his best friends achieved their goal, Bucky felt like he was missing something. None of the women in their community really excited him or really engaged him beyond his physical needs. Sure, there were plenty orc, human, and even elf females who would warm his bed, but none of them cared to stay and listen…except for you, the woman who was now struggling to take off her bikini top after talking machines and engineering with him without getting annoyed by his antics.

You were so eager — and so was he — but he didn’t want to have sex and then have you disappear on him like the others, not when he was finally making a connection. No, he would make this last a little longer, even if this meant disappointing you.

“We should go sleep.” He mumbled as his hand halted your efforts.

——————

With a heavy sigh, you relented, got dressed, and waited for him to get his things. Your eyes were downcast as you escorted him to the chambers he would be sharing with his kin.

Bucky tried to give you a goodnight kiss, but you rebuffed him with a curt “good night” and returned to you and your sister’s shared room.

You were greeted to Fumnanya gushing about Sam and his interest in the library. Part of you was happy for her. Fumnanya rarely got out of her shell and getting with a guy that was even remotely interested in books as much as she was exceedingly rare.

You wanted to say that you were excited for her, you really did, but you were still a little sullen and bitter about what happed with Bucky at the baths.

“So, you and Bucky sure took your time.” Ghada remarked as you were putting on your night clothes (a short tunic and mid-calf pants).

“You’re one to talk! Sam and I caught you and Steve making out in the changing rooms at the baths!” Fumnanya snapped. Great, even Ghada was getting more in the romance department than you were.

You gave Fumnanya a grateful smile while you settled into bed hoping that tomorrow would bring better fortunes.

——————-

You awoke with a slight start and a knock at the door. Grabbing your robe, you raced towards the door thinking it was Bucky only to find a letter floating in a glowing rosy pink sphere. As soon as you reached out to touch the sphere, it disappeared leaving the letter to slowly descend into your hands.

By this time, your sisters joined you in reading the letter. It was written by one of your favorite tutors, Aoife.

It read:

Dearest children,

If you are reading this, then this means that I am either dead or completely unable to reach you. I hope you weren’t asleep for too long, but something tells me you have. For that, I am sorry.

I wish I could be there to hug you and your matches, but I’m guessing you know of your uncle by now. He has been after you for years now. My wards were successful in keeping him at bay, but now, I’m afraid you’re on your own.

The mist surrounding the capital will fade in three days time. By then, you will need to go into hiding in order to not fall into Sophronius’ clutches.

Have faith, be brave, trust in yourselves, and be kind my dears. Also, trust in your matches, okay?

Warm Regards,

Aoife

Aoife was one of the few people who actually liked all three of you the way you were. Finding out that she could be dead was the straw that broke the camel’s back for the three of you.

When the orc hybrid trio found you, you were huddled on Ghada’s bed with the letter on the floor in front of you.

Steve gently coaxed the three of you out of your beds with the suggestion of showing them around the capital. It didn’t get you or your sisters completely happy, but it was a start.

The tour consisted of you and Ghada butting heads over where to take the guys (the theatre district is NOT better than the artisan market), Fumnanya pointing out prominent buildings and statues.

You could’ve sworn that the guys sneered at one of the monuments to one of your ancestors, but you let it slide.

But then, Bucky made an offhand comment about what was must have went into making this place and the sacrifices that was probably made.

You have thought about what must’ve went into making the capital, but never in a negative light. No one in the capital or in the surrounding cities, towns or villages were poor on dire straits. You made sure to get the truth through your little excursions out of the palace before Etna cast that infernal spell on you.

The thought was pushed aside when you and your sisters returned to your room that night. You needed to think of a plan and quickly because Aoife’s spell was going to fade in two days and Sophronius was hot on your tails.

“Perhaps the guys would let us stay with their community for a while.” Ghada put forth as you were getting ready for bed.

“That’s a possibility, but what do we have to offer? I doubt that a semi-nomadic community of mostly orcs would take on three enhanced human princesses for free” Ghada countered as she put on her nightgown.

“Are you serious?!” you exclaimed. “We have tons to offer! Look, Fumnanya is a great medic, you’re awesome diplomat and negotiator, and I’m good with machinery. Plus we can cook and take care of ourselves, so I doubt we would be a huge burden.”

“Also, we can give them some of the treasure that’s laying around the palace for them to use.” Fumnanya chirped.

“Exactly. We’ve got this!” You declared not realizing that the guys were having a similar conversation.

——————

“So, what should we do about the girls? I mean, they’re great and all, but can we bring them back with us?” Sam inquired as stripped down to his loincloth.

“I don’t see why not. They’ve actually got skills the group could use, unlike a lot of the females that first become part of our tribe.” Steve stated as he gnawed on the turkey leg from dinner.

“Maybe we could bring the tribe here! The city is completely deserted except for the girls and they certainly won’t mind us living here.” Sam offered.

“I don’t think that would be the wisest course of action. Like the girls said, the spell that keeps the mist in place will fade in two days. It won’t be long before Sophronius’ horde will crawling all over the place.” Bucky voiced thinking about last night’s interaction.

“Alright, we’ll see what the girls think tomorrow and go from there.” Steve concluded and the three went to sleep.

———————

Both parties began packing for their journey the next day once the guys agreed to take the three of you back with them.

You gave everyone three travel sized storage units. Ghada packed all of her notes on trade, language books, and art supplies. Fumnanya packed all of the medical supplies she could fit into her storage unit, her language, history, science, and geography books. You packed most of your tools, a couple of your inventions (including waning swan), and any materials you might need.

All three of you made sure to pack clothes, cooking supplies (especially spices since the guys were surprised at the variety), personal hygiene supplies, and some of the treasure/objects that would most likely fetch a good price without leading anyone back to them.

The time to leave came soon enough.

“You three ready?” Sam asked as you were making the final adjustments to your traveling clothes.

“As ready as we’ll ever be.” Fumnanya replied as she gave Sam a hug. It surprised you how quickly she warmed up to him.

“Perhaps you should give Bucky another chance.” Ghada advised.

Maybe, but not now.

You made your way to the courtyard taking in everything. The dire wolves nuzzled your cheeks as you made your way to mount them.

Steve gave both Sam and Bucky a nod and you began your journey out of the only home you three knew.

Perhaps this new chapter will be a good one.

—————

If you had looked up at the third tree closest to the thorn bushes, you would’ve seen a solitary raven, a raven with four red eyes. The raven was a scout for Sophronius and it was recording you.

Video of your departure was being transmitted to a crystal ball in the throne room of Sophronius’ main headquarters.

“It seems the bitch Aoife was able to keep them young after all.” Sophronius remarked, taking in the princesses’ features.

“Alert the princes. We have work to do.”

Taglist:

@giorno-plays-piano @lookiamtrying @saiyanprincessswanie @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @zoiecakes @mcudarklibrary @letsby @macheregrace @imdarkinme @retroxvailles @marvelfansworld @anyatheladyclown @stargazingfangirl18 @hurricanerin @pseudonymphet @dahkness @buckysbunny @rosalynshields @opheliadawnwalker3 @sapphirescrolls @golden-ariess @cherienymphe

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sergeant-donny-donowitz · 4 years

Text

Safety First (Hugo Stiglitz x Reader)

Requested by @cass-danvers

@owba-chan @war-obsessed @inglourious-imagines @tealaquinn @struggling-bee @frozenhuntress67 @kwyloz @sodapop182

Let me know if you wanna be added to the IB or OUATIH taglists! :)

A/N: (p/n)=your pronouns :)

_________________________________________ Utivich was panicking as he cried out, "DO WE TAKE IT OUT OR LEAVE IT I-" Hugo pulled Utivich away from Wicki, who had a bullet in his chest, and blood pouring out his mouth. Hugo shook his head, and muttered, "Don't do anything." "WHAT DO YOU MEAN DON'T DO ANY-" Donny was crouching by Wicki, "He's sayin' something in German. Hugo, listen!" Hugo sat by, and listened. "It's an address," he looked up at the others, all of which were as confused as him. Aldo immediately turned to the last nazi they'd left alive, "Where the hell is that?"

The nazi raised a shaking finger as he stuttered some directions.

Aldo nodded, "Well, very kind of you, boy." He cleared his throat as he studied his newly acquired luger, "Normally we let one of you shit faces go with a pretty little mark on his face and a story to tell, but we can't have you tellin' 'em where we went, now can we, boy?" The nazi looked at Aldo with wide, terrified eyes. " An' that don't change the fact I got a man dyin' back there..." He raised the gun, and shot the last nazi in the face, as the basterds moved Wicki carefully. ******

It was nearly two in the morning when you heard a knock...no...a knock is polite. And unheard at such an ungodly hour. This was incessant, endless, deafening sound, threatening to break down the door.

Fortunately, you were wide awake, in a quiet room, hidden to the untrained eye, studying things that would be a death sentence if found by nazis.

You quickly and quietly hid the papers away, and pushed the bookcase back into its tidy space, hiding away your secret rebellions.

You sighed, knowing perhaps you were in over your head... Perhaps this would be the night your luck ran out.

When you opened the door and immediately saw a gun pointed directly between your eyes, you raised an eyebrow. You knew nazis would draw out their cynicism.

Then, you looked at the face behind the gun.

You recognized it from the newspapers, not so long ago.

Hugo Stiglitz.

In spite of an imminent threat of a bullet being lodged in your brain, you were no longer worrying, or even wondering what was wrong. His voice was demanding as he pushed the gun against your forehead. "Sind Sie ein Arzt?" 'Are you a doctor?' You nodded, and Hugo grabbed onto your collar, pushing you inside as what could only be the basterds, began to pour into your livingroom. "Schreie um Hilfe und du stirbst." 'Scream for help and you die.' "Notiert." 'Noted,' you smiled a bit smugly, then glanced past him, spotting a bloody man in their arms. "This way," you pulled away from Hugo, completely defying him and his threats...You knew the stories, and frankly anyone with half a mind in your place would be scared of him... But you weren't. You glanced at Hugo for a brief moment as you walked by and led them down the hall. That man was one of the most gorgeous people you'd seen in your life. And...he was stunned that you didn't even blink in the face of death. Hugo looked down at his thumb. When you pulled away from his grip, something on your collar had cut him. You pushed your bookcase aside, and turned on the lights. You pushed papers and maps away from a steel table, and turned on every lamp in the room. You pulled out a kit with surgical supplies, and pulled a cloth over the table. "Here." You turned, and saw the face of the basterd that was bloody and barely breathing. Your eyes went wide, and your heart skipped a beat. It couldn't be him... You shook your head once at yourself. No, this wasn't the time to be emotional. You had to act, and act quickly. There would be enough time for this nonsense later, you hoped. "That was fast..."Donny muttered as he and Aldo lugged Wicki onto the table. Smitty looked around, "Is no one going to ask what the fuck this place-" Aldo ignored him, and looked to you, "Is he going to live?" That struck you. Your half moment of hesitation took everyone's breath, and an uneasy, eerie silence blanketed the room. You turned to look at him, studied the wound for a moment, "Schwer zu erzählen..." 'Hard to tell...' you sighed, and Hugo caught on. He asked again. His tone was not quite as aggressive as it was minutes before. It was pleading, as you lingered by the doorway, on your way to wash your hands, Aldo following with a gun to make sure that was all you did. You turned for a moment, "Ich werde alles tun, was ich kann." 'I'll do everything I can...' You disappeared down the hall, and Omar asked, "What'd the doctor say?" "(P/n) will do the best (p/n) can." You ran back in, and started to lay out everything you needed. You looked up, "I have no morphine."

Hirschberg muttered something as he lit a cigarette. Aldo raised his gun, and kept it trained on you, making sure you did as you were told. "I need you to hold him down in case he wakes up." You set down a bottle of whiskey on the edge, and turned him over slightly. No exit wound... You nodded, silently hoping that bullet wound was shallow, and that the bullet itself was in one piece. You felt a looming presence by you, and saw Hugo Stiglitz was standing over the wounded man, holding down his shoulders, just in case...though he seemed distracted, and distant. He was looking at you, with a gaze only a soldier could have. He'd seen much, but he was not ready to see his friend like that. You took a shot, "Sicherheit zuerst," 'Safety first,' which made Hugo’s expression soften. It was the closest thing to a smile as he made in a long time. Some of the other basterds circled around, ready to hold Wicki down if he woke up in the middle of it all, and also took a shot for 'safety.' You sighed, understanding how that soldier must have felt, placing his friend's life in the hands of someone he couldn't trust. Better yet, you knew you had to save Wicki. Because you didn't have time to explain that you knew him, and you had known him for most of your life. You had to save him because you had so many things to tell him. You had to save him because you wouldn't be able to bear life knowing that you didn't. So, you sighed, and quietly explained everything you were doing, hoping that would ease at least Hugo Stiglitz. "Es sieht so aus, als ob keine Arterie oder kein Organ berührt wurde," 'Looks like no artery or organ was touched,' you glanced at him for a moment, and Hugo nodded once. You looked back down, patting away blood with a clean cloth. You shuddered as you took your scalpel, and took a breath. For years, you had stayed up late nights, wondering what had happened to Wilhelm. Now you knew. You met Wilhelm Wicki when you moved to the city as a kid. Wicki lived in the house next door. When you were older you moved out on your own, to the place where you lived now. Wil was your best friend, and he came over almost every day, always told you about work, asked you what he was doing wrong when his girlfriends were angry at him... One day, around 1938, you had a bit of a falling out, though nothing that couldn't be fixed. He simply didn't show up. A day or two passed before you began to wonder about him. He didn't even answer the phone. Wilhelm wasn't one to hold a grudge, this just wasn't like him. So you marched down to his house, but he was gone... along with his mother and sisters. You feared the worst... you worried they'd been taken away. It wouldn't have been unheard of. You spent years looking for a clue, a sign, even a rumor. But you never found a word. So, you decided to do your best. You were a doctor, but that didn't mean you didn't have your own convictions. You wore a safety pin hidden by your collar, as many across Europe were doing as a sign of resistance. You built this hidden room to help people hide. You used maps and stolen documents to chart escape routes for Jewish families since you couldn't help Wicki. But now, as he was on that makeshift operating table, you realized you'd been looking for him on the wrong side of world. You smiled softly for a brief moment with a soft sigh. You whispered hopefully, "Wilhelm..." Hugo glanced at you, his eyebrow raised, wondering how you knew Wicki’s name. But, a gleam from your collar diverted his attention for a moment. His eyes widened, spotting the safety pin on your collar. He looked to Aldo, "Aldo, put the gun down." Aldo looked to Hugo, "What? But-" "The doctor's not a nazi." "How do you know?!" "Trust me." The basterds all looked at Hugo. He never said much, but when he did, they listened. You glanced at Hugo, and he looked to you, then nodded. Aldo lowered his gun. He sat on a nearby chair, and realized he was sitting on a few papers. He picked them up, and only took a few moments to realize who you really were. "Y'know doc, if we was nazis, you'd be sent to a firing squad by dawn," he smiled as he raised the papers up. You chuckled, spotting what was in his hands, "I don't think so. That's far too much mercy for a traitor like me." Hugo whispered so softly, you didn't hear, but you felt his gaze fall on you again, "Wie wir." 'Like us...' he referred to you, and himself. He knew you were right. He was tortured by the nazis as a traitor once, and for a moment, it horrified him to even imagine you going through something like that. In that moment, each and every basterd flocked to the table to hold down Wicki, who was screaming at the top of his lungs and beginning to thrash around. You focused back on him, looked into his wide, pain-struck eyes, and sweaty, palid face. "Just one minute more," you looked around as the basterds, just before you picked up the pace. Wicki's eyes feverishly focused on yours as you shook your head sincerely, and whispered "Es tut mir leid, es tut mir so leid, Liebling, nur noch eine Minute." "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, darling, just a minute more." His breathing slowed a little as you worked quickly, and he tried his best to hold still as you whispered, "Du bist in Ordnung. Du bist in Ordnung, alles ist in Ordnung, Wil." "You're ok. You're ok, everything's ok, Wil." Hugo glanced up, seeing how gentle you were, and his heart sank a little, dismissing the fleeting hope that some day, someone somewhere would show at least an ounce of the kindness you showed to Wicki. "There, not so bad, was it?" You pulled the last stitch shut, and smiled wearily down at your old friend, who smiled through the pain, and murmured, "You're still here..." "I'd never leave," you smiled softly, as you patted sweat away from his skin. It was then that he looked up at you, "I'm sorry that I did." You shook your head, "That was so long ago," you smiled kindly at him, as Hugo looked on, wondering what had happened. "Y/n..." Wicki tried to get up, put you shook your head, "Rest now. We'll talk in the morning." Aldo asked Hugo, "What's goin' on?" Hugo glanced at you, then Wicki, then looked to his lieutenant. "Y/n...” He paused, and sighed slightly as he said your name, “Y/n and Wicki knew each other once..." Donny shrugged, "Guess the address thing makes sense now..." **** It was decided later that night, in a relaxed and relieved circle littered with drinks, that Wicki was going to stay with you until he recovered. The basterds would come back for him. The next morning, Hugo was trying to think of something to say. He said something you already knew to be true, "We'll come back." "I know," you smiled softly, and it melted his heart. You were both quiet for an instant more than Hugo wanted. Normally, he was comfortable in silence, but, he liked hearing your voice. Somehow, it soothed aching memories that always lingered in the back of his mind. "I'm sorry if I scared you when-" You shook your head, "Don't be." "For yelling..." "I understand," You smiled a little again, poured him a drink, and handed it to him kindly. He looked at it, then at you. You both looked at each other for a moment or two, then couldn't help but to kiss. When it was over, Hugo opened his eyes a few moments after you did and remained breathless, and you giggled quietly as he smiled to hide a red shade of embarassment, It had been a long time since he kissed anyone. Longer still since he'd felt anything close to what he felt for you. "Can I make it up to you?" Suddenly, your expression changed. Something cunning, something lurking behind the kind smiles and soft giggles emerged in the form of a smirk and a twisted wink, "Bring me a nazi or two when you come back here." **** You and Wicki caught up, telling each other any and everything. Well...the one thing you didn't tell him was the time that you kissed Hugo. Some time passed. It was nearly four in the morning. You were halfway up the stairs on your way to your bedroom. Wicki had fallen asleep hours before, and was in another bedroom. Suddenly, you heard pounding at the door, and you stopped in your tracks. You sighed. It was a toss up between nazis searching your home again, the basterds coming back for Wicki, or a housecall for a sudden burst appendix. By the time you got downstairs, Wicki was already standing by the door, with a revolver in his hand. "Way to raise suspicions." He panicked for a moment, "If they're nazis, just...well...just say we're married an-" "That would never work! They'd know from records, first of all. Second of all, I wouldn't marry you." He rolled his eyes, "I forgot how mean you were." You both heard a familiar voice behind the door, "Wir sind keine Nazis" 'We're not nazis.' You smiled, and opened the door, finding the basterds there, Hugo up front, holding two nazis whose mouths were duct taped, and wrists were tied. "But we brought you a gift." You chuckled, "Come in, boys." You quickly shut the door so no one would see. Then again, only basterds like them would be up at that hour. "Gift number one, this boy here done broke his arm fightin' that nazi over there." Aldo nudged Utivich over to you. The poor kid was holding up his arm, and seemed green from the pain. "How long's it been this way?" You asked as you started to feel for the broken bone. Utivich grimaced, "A few hours." "Come on," you led them all back to the sliding bookcase, and brought them all to the hidden room. "Sit there." You looked up, "Well the good new is, it isn't broken." Utivich shut his eyes as he rolled his head back, and muttered through gritted teeth, "Well it fucking feels like it." You nodded with a sigh, "I know but it's...oh shit...what's the word...." You glanced not to Wicki, but to Hugo. Wicki was stunned for a moment, but...he had suspected some things. By suspected...he saw you and Hugo kiss before the basterds left. He smiled, as you looked to Hugo and said, "Ausgerenkte?" He nodded, "Y/n says it's dislocated." "You're....you're gonna..." You saw the fear in the poor kid's eyes, and you smiled kindly, "It'll only take a second, don't worry. Take a breath," sure enough, as much as it hurt, and as much as he groaned, you remarked, "Don't scream too much, or you'll scare the next two." Hugo smirked, and looked at you. There it was again, that glint of something plotting...something vengeful beyond the gentle eyes and smiles. Once you were done fixing up Utivich's arm, you offered to put up the basterds for a few days so they could all rest. Once the basterds settled in, most of them fell asleep immediately. This was the first time they had warm, relatively safe beds to sleep in months. Only Hugo stayed awake, waiting until he heard you come upstairs. But he didn't. He heard the bookcase slide shut, and nothing after that. He looked for you, as soon as morning came, and in that hidden room, something unspeakable had happened. Something with an unmistakable flair for the macabre, and yet, with surgical precision. It was almost surreal. But revenge was revenge, and it was beautiful in Hugo's eyes, just as you were. He looked at your work, and the unidentifiable nazis, then at you. "This place is sound proof, isn't it..." That smirk was all he needed as an answer. He smirked right back. All evidence was expertly wiped down. The results of your experiment were left somewhere the nazis in the city could find as a warning, but not traced back to you. Soon, it was the basterds' last night staying with you. Hugo noted you were quieter, and a little distant. The silence wasn't so unnerving this time, just heartbreaking. Hugo kissed you, and you kissed him. There was an air of desparation shared by both of you, knowing that nothing was ever certain in the time you lived in. He broke away from your lips for a spare moment, and whispered, 'Ich werde zurück kommen.' "I'll come back." You smiled softly, remembering the last time he promised that. "Ich weiß." 'I know.' You looked up at him. Your quiet, soft smile fading into something more as you began to wrap your legs around him. He smirked at you, shutting the bookcase behind him, as he wrapped his arms around you, winking about the sound proof room, as he remarked "Sicherheit zuerst," 'Safety first.'

#hugo stiglitz #hugo stiglitz x reader #Inglourious Basterds #inglourious basterds imagine

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angrylizardjacket · 4 years

Text

mouth full of white lies {Machine Gun Kelly} 4

4. i wanna know what’s your quietest feeling

Summary: So you’ve met his friends, and now his daughter, who’s the only other person who knows that this whole thing is a setup. But all she wants is to make sure that you’re not gonna break her dad’s heart; it shouldn’t be too hard to convince her that your intentions are good.

the brainstrust: @sataninsatin @silvertonguedserpent @juliarose21 @kellysimagines @estxxbritt @machine-gun-casie @harringtonstudios @misscharlottelee @narcvissa @hiworlditishumbleme @angelwarner28 @nevilles-insinuations @rumoured-whispers @mgkobsessed @edwardtriggerhandzz @suckerforbarnes @wastelcve @bakerkells @local-troubled-writer @freddiessmallnipples @oopsiedoopsie23 @mayaslifeinabox @mrs-machinegun-norris @hxbbit

----

Colson writes. A lot. You’d noticed it here and there being close to home, being close his studio, he’s buzzing with new ideas. There’s a ratty notebook that he keeps in the front pocket of his suitcase, held together by fibers and hope, that seems to be worth it’s weight in gold to him, full of lyrics and ideas that he’s been hoarding for as long as he’s been writing. About ten percent of the book has actually come to fruition, but that’s not what’s important about it, it’s that it’s positively brimming with potential as much as it is memories.

It’s been less than a year since his last album, and he’s made a few songs here and there, but now he writes, when inspiration strikes him, after work, or between takes. He’s in talks with Motley themselves, apparently, working on a part for one of their songs, rereleasing with the release of the film. For now, he writes, and he hums, and tests out lyrics under his breath.

“That sounds good,” it’s Sunday morning; he’s up earlier than you, which isn’t necessarily an unusual occurrence. He’s wearing sweatpants, hair curling a little at the ends where he’s letting it air dry, sitting up beside you on the bed. He’s got his notebook balanced on the one knee he’s got drawn up to him, while the other leg is kicked out in front of him, and he’s humming something while scrolling through his phone. He’s muttering something, lyrics you’re pretty sure, while something plays from his phone.

He seems a little surprised, like he’s coming out of a trance that the music had put him in, and smiles with an honest sincerity.

You yawn, and wiggle a little beneath the covers to properly face him, face half-smushed into the pillow. For a beat he looks at you like he wants to do something, like he wants to reach out and touch your cheek, trace his thumb across your lip -

Wishful thinking. Probably.

“Rook’s been working on some stuff; he sent this through last night,” and he tapped away at his phone for a moment, replaying the track on his phone. It’s an instrumental, beat-heavy and the bones for a solid bop. You nod along to it, and he starts rapping under his breath again.

“I think it could be something good,” he sounds quietly hopeful; he doesn’t sound like that often.

“Of course it’ll be good,” you say around a yawn, and this time he does reach out.

“Go back to sleep,” he pinches gently at your cheek, and a warm rush of affection floods through you. Without thinking, you turn to press a quick kiss to his palm, a moment of gentle familiarity, and turn away, to go back to sleep, without thinking to watch for his reaction. You hear a faint, almost disbelieving huff of laughter, before the music starts back up again.

It’s not long before you’re ingratiated with his friends, who’ve all taken you and Colson in stride. Mostly it’s drinking and smoking and making music and playing video games, so even your initial anxiety is quick to fade.

That first morning, Wednesday, cool but sunny, it’s easy; Rook’s the only one awake when you and Colson arrive. He’s sitting at the kitchen island, perched on a stool with a pen stuck in his mouth, and a laptop and drum pad machine sitting on the counter, and when you walk in, he gives you a long, evaluative stare, a joint in between his fingers, idle.

“Hey man, this is Ducky,” Colson doesn’t seem to notice how you’ve frozen awkwardly in the doorway, moving past you to start searching the cupboards for food; Rook nods to him, before looking back at him, “Ducky, this is my man Rook,” and at that, he holds out his hand for the joint, and Rook passes it over, before looking back at you. You give a little, uncomfortable wave.

“Ducky?” He asks, curious rather than hostile, and you let yourself breathe, stepping into the room.

“Or Duck,” you explain, heading to the counter where Colson’s now wrestling with a packet of Doritos, “or [Y/N].” And you put your bag down, taking the seat beside Rook as Colson passes the joint back to him to get a better handle on the bag.

“Tight,” Rook says after a moment, apparently finding something in you that he approves of, because he follows it up by turning the laptop towards you, asking if you were into music. Of course you tell him you are - who isn’t? - but you don’t have a lot of experience in the production side of things.

“I mean,” you concede briefly, “about two years ago there was a trend going around on YouTube where you make a diss track about yourself -” Colson’s entire face lit up.

“You wrote a diss track about yourself? Don’t you do like cutesy vlogs and shit?” He asks, and it’s not meant to sound as unkind as it’s worded, though you still roll your eyes.

“It pays to be on trend,” you shrug, still a little embarrassed at the memory, “but it was fun.”

Colson is looks actually impressed, while Rook is still chewing on the end of his pen, typing away frantically. After a beat, Colson turns to him -

“Her channel name is DuckDuckBooth -”

“I’ve already found the video,” Rook says with a smile, and you have to hide your face in your hands as they watch with equal parts fondness, and a little bit of second hand embarrassment.

Colson posts to his Instagram story a video of Rook jamming out to your self-diss track, before the camera swings around to see you flipping them both off with a fond smile. Your video is the only sound that can be heard for the full duration of the ten second video -

“Too scared of you’re face on the big, big screen, you think YouTube’s gonna be more stable / even though you use your bro for views every chance that you’re able. / With all of the time that you spend around sets, they all think you’re a professional stalker / and you spill you’re guts when you’re NDA free; you’ve made a career as Hollywood’s biggest talker. / [As if! Who asked for the Perez Hilton of the production crew?!]”

He tags both you and Rook, and captioned the video with a question: Should we remix Ducky’s self-diss track from 2016? With two options for fans to choose: Yes. or Definitely.

But Rook’s not who your worried about. None of Colson’s friends really worry you.

Casie arrives a week and a half after you’ve all moved locations, to see her dad, to meet you, and to sit in on production for about a week.

When you finally meet her, her cocked hip and crossed arms reminds you of Colson; she’s four and a bit feet of skepticism and an unmatched, effortlessly cool energy, and you realise too late that you’re kind of intimidated by an elementary schooler.

“I’ve seen your videos,” is the first thing she says to you, and you find yourself smiling, bewildered.

“Cas -” Colson’s voice holds a note of warning where he’s currently getting his tattoos covered. He’s standing with his arms out, looking straight ahead while Corey, the key makeup artist, and his team, airbrush and colour correct like their lives depend on it.

“I’m making sure she’s taking care of you,” Casie, unwavering in both her conviction and her loyalty, shifts her weight to her other foot. “The drum video was cute.” And you’re not quite sure if it’s a compliment, judging by the cool tone of her voice, but she’s wearing a slight smile that you’ve seen on Colson far too many times to not recognize it. This feels like the first of many tests.

She’s adamant that she’s not someone to be bought, though the thought had barely crossed your mind. When she nods approvingly at your dismissal of the suggestion, you can’t help but frown.

“How many girls have tried to get on her good side by buying her stuff?” You ask Colson quietly, out of Casie’s earshot later that night. For a moment, he looks as close to guilty as you’ve ever seen him.

“Not a lot, like one or two maybe; not a lot of girls meet her,” he admitted, “but the ones that try and buy her gifts and shit, they always turned out to be the worst ones,” and perhaps the guilt intensifies a little more, “she’s a good kid; always saw that before I could.”

“She’s a good kid,” you repeated, softer this time, with a faint smile, and when Colson comes back to reality, he gives your shoulder a squeeze.

She’s on set a lot for the days that she’s staying with you all, and when she sees you at work, she appears to warm to you; you’re not sure when you forgot that she was just a child trying to protect her father, but you’re reminded when you see the starry-eyed look she’s giving the makeup artists.

“Hey Corey,” you ask, smiling a little, and the makeup artist who had been in the middle of his lunch looks up from his phone with wide, alert eyes, “could one of your people give Casie here a little bit of 80s glam?” You ask sweetly, and his expression tuns fond as he nods. Casie turns wide-eyed and a little abashed at request, and murmurs that she doesn’t want to be any trouble. Both Corey and yourself wave away her concerns, and Amy, one of the makeup assistants, is more than happy to give the young girl a bit of glitter and gloss to the excited young girl.

She’s got glitter on her eyelids, and blush and highlighter adorning her cheeks, and a shiny, clear lip gloss making her smile that little bit brighter by the time the makeup woman is done with her, and Casie is practically glowing.

“How in the hell,” Colson starts with a grin when she goes to him to show off, “did I end up with the most stylish kid in the world? Cas, you look like a model.” Pride is radiating off of him in waves, and he pulls out his phone, “babe, get a picture, she looks so fuckin’ cool,” he enthuses, and if your heart skips a beat as his casual use of a pet-name, you’re enough of a professional not to let it show. Casie is calling him embarrassing, but is still beaming, and with him in full costume and her all made up, the picture you take - he’s standing behind her with his hands on her shoulders, and she’s got her arms crossed, both of them looking serious and menacing at the camera - you think they might be the coolest people you’ve ever met. Certainly one of the most photogenic father/daughter duos you’ve ever come across.

“Do not make it your phone background,” Casie presses her embarrassed smile into his shoulder where they’re reviewing the photo back in his trailer.

“But I’m not allowed to post it, and I wanna admire it every day - look at you!” He’s pointedly zooming in on her stony expression in the photo.

“[Y/N], tell him he’s being ridiculous,” Casie implored you, and you threw your hands up in surrender.

“I’m not allowed to say what is and isn’t a ridiculous phone background,” you say automatically, which piques both of their interests, and you immediately regret saying anything.

“Babe,” Colson says, prompting you, and you feel yourself growing flustered, both because you’re going to have to admit that your background is a photo of you two, and that he’s called you that twice in about half an hour. Casie’s amused now, smiling, her arms crossed as she raises her eyebrows at you expectantly. Taking a deep breath, you unlock your phone.

“I’m just trying to be a good girlfriend,” you say, avoiding their gazes as you show them your home screen, and your background; the paparazzi photo of you and Colson beneath the boardwalk.

“Is that how you organise your apps?” Is what Casie has to say, which has Colson snorting with laughter, though when you finally look at him, you see him wearing a weirdly pleased little smile.

“Ducky, that’s weird and adorable -”

“It’s not weird!” You protest, snatching back your phone, flustered, but Casie just rolls her eyes, pulling out her own phone.

“Come here, both of you,” she instructs, sounding terribly put upon by the both of you. You both crowd around her, with only slight confusion. “Look convincing.” She holds up her phone, and you both frown a little.

“What?”

“Look convincing,” she insists again, gesturing between the two of you, and finally coming to understand her meaning, Colson gives her an endeared, almost proud look, and you in turn are looking fondly at him. Neither of you have noticed that she’s already taken the selfie. After a beat, she lowers the phone and starts looking at the few photos she’d taken, and both you and Colson seem a little surprised at her speed. “Dad, I’ll send it to you, you send it to her; you can have a photo of both of us looking cool, and a photo of your ‘girlfriend’,” she explains with implicit air quotes, “and [Y/N], you don’t have to have a creepy pap’s picture as your background.” She taps away for a moment before swiftly sending the best photo to Colson, “plus you’ll match.”

“You’re a little genius,” you tell her once Colson’s sent you the photo. Casie beams at you.

“I know.”

And the way you’re smiling in the photo is more than convincing.

[ID: A series of three tweets from @machinegunkelly:

1: Retweeted with the caption ‘🥰🥰’, originally posted by @duckduckbooth with no caption: Two pictures of Rosa Diaz from Brooklyn 99 holding a golden retriever puppy with an edited caption reading ‘I’ve only known CASIE BAKER for a day and a half but if anything happened to HER I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.’

2: Tweeted: when me n my girls (my daughter and @duckduckbooth) hang out i realize i’m somehow the least fashionable in the group. when did that happen wtf 😳😳

3. Tweeted: maybe you'll skip to the end and pass all the irrational decisions, patch up all the passion that was missin'. i think that's enough. i'm feelin' lovesick.

End ID.]

Maybe it’s that she likes you, maybe she’s just trying to keep an eye on you to make sure you’ve got her dad’s best intentions at heart, but Casie takes it upon herself to almost shadow you while on set, at least when she’s not with her dad.

“What’s your next video going to be?” She asks one afternoon when you’re both waiting for Colson in his trailer as he gets his makeup removed for the day. She’s watching a video on her phone and you’re reading emails on yours, and you look up, interested. After a moment, she pauses her video, looking up, looking back at you, “I like your ‘day in the life’ ones.”

“I didn’t realise you liked my videos,” you said with faint amusement, and she gives a small smile.

“I’ve been binging them,” she admits, and shuffles a little, sitting up further where she’s reclining on the uncomfortable little sofa, “your editing is really nice; I liked your Euro-Disney video, it was really pretty.”

“Thanks,” you find yourself a little humbled at her compliment, and find yourself musing that you’d like to get back to that style of video, “hey,” you find yourself coming up with an idea, something Colson had said during your first actual date, and with Casie herself now here, it was the perfect opportunity, “do you wanna be in a video?”

“Hello! Hello and welcome back, ducklings! I’ve been feeling rather nostalgic for some of my older content, and was inspired by none other than Miss Casie Baker, so what better day than this beautiful Friday afternoon, to take you all along with Casie, Kells, and I as we head to a boardwalk fair.”

It’s a short drive to the boardwalk, and once you’re there, it’s almost unbearably cheesy. Rides, candy, you and Colson in competition trying to win a prize for Casie at one of the cheap game booths.

You’re filming on and off the whole time, getting aesthetic shots, your heart growing warmer with each genuine smile you manage to catch on camera. You take endless candid photos of Colson and Casie, and even though you know you can’t be out too late because you and Colson are due on set at eight, you make the most of the time you have.

After an hour and a half, you stop at the food vendor, craving hot chips, and Colson orders, while Casie takes your hand, the two of you hanging back.

"Can we go on the Ferris Wheel?"

"Just a minute kiddo, food's almost ready," Colson tells her over his shoulder, but she tugs at your hand, making her meaning more clear.

"You can catch up, we can go around twice; I wanna talk to [Y/N]," she tells him plainly, and you give her a smile, already acquiescing to her suggestion. Colson makes a noise of gentle protest, but he sees her hand in yours, and the reassuring look you've leveled at him.

"Take care of my girl," he tells you with a faux seriousness, and Casie gives a small grin at that.

"I'll protect her with my life," you promise, leaning in to kiss his cheek.

"You better," he grinned, tone fond and a little teasing, before assuring that he'd meet you both up there, and you're left wondering what about you screamed 'let's have a serious conversation on a Ferris Wheel' because if it happens again, it goes from a coincidence to a pattern. Casie drops your hand and trots easily through the crowd to the Wheel that had cast the rest of the fair in shadow as the sun set behind it. The ride operator gives you a toothy smile as she secures the door behind the two of you, and Casie links her fingers, resting her elbows on her knees, and her chin on her hands, evaluating you with an inscrutable look. She waits until the basket is about a quarter of the way around before saying anything; for your part, you’re silent, she’s the one who wanted to speak after all.

“Dad doesn’t do fake,” she says finally, sitting back, and lets you wonder in silence for a few moments, what that even means, “I know he did, I’m not blind or deaf, people… people talk to me. A lot. About things my dad’s done.” This piece of information has your expression souring - she’s just a kid - but she doesn’t seem bothered by it, she just seems… almost confused.

“I’m not going to -”

“I know.” She cuts you off before you can even voice what reassurance you could manage, “I’ve gathered that; you’re good. Better than probably any other girl who’s gotten with him for clout.”

“I’m not -” You try to protest and she does look a little apologetic, but after a moment, you stop yourself, and let her continue, trying to understand where she was coming from.

“I know why he likes you, I get it, you -” she averts her gaze for a moment, suddenly a little embarrassed, “you’re actually really cool,” she admits, and your heart softens, but you keep quiet, and let her build back up to her bravado, “but back when his manager had him with like, models and actresses and things, they were all - I mean sometimes they were nice, but they always thought they were better than him, or they just treated him like dirt when people weren’t around, so now, dad doesn’t do fake.” It’s said definitively. You’re at the top of the Ferris Wheel now, stopped for a few moments, and she looks out at the rest of the fair, and then down to the base of the ride, letting herself smile when she spots Colson at the bottom, giving him a wave.

Somehow, sitting in this basket in the sky, it feels like a mafia movie, like this little girl is implying she’ll break your kneecaps if you hurt her father. Or she’s implying something that your heart dare not read into, lest you get your hopes up.

“Dad doesn’t break his rules for just anyone,” Casie finally sits back up, and there’s a new, kinder quality about her voice, before it turns young, turns plaintive, and you’re reminded that she’s just a child looking out for her dad, her hero, “please don’t make him regret it. He’s a good person, I know what people say but he’s -”

“Casie, I care about him. A lot.” You tell her honestly, gently, and she blinks wide and surprised for a few moments, before her expression turns to almost weirdly pleased, maybe even a little smug.

“Good.” She says with conviction, before looking out at the horizon, “this would be a nice shot.”

“It’d be nicer with your dad,” you hear yourself saying, and Casie huffs out a laugh that sounds so much like her father, agreeing quietly. When your basket stops at the bottom of the wheel, Colson flashes his ride wristband to the kid operating it, and he slides into the seat beside you. Casie’s still smiling as she takes a chip from where he offered them.

“Nice chat?” He asks, and offers you the chips too.

“I like her,” Casie announces, and you grin to yourself, “dad, I love you, but you’d better treat Duck right; we’re friends now.” Which sets Colson off laughing, and you turn on your camera.

“You were meant to be on my side,” he laughs, and Casie shrugs.

“I am, I’m on both your sides.”

#mgk #mgk x reader #mgk imagine #machine gun kelly #machine gun kelly imagine #machine gun kelly x reader #colson baker #colson baker imagine #colson baker x reader #the dirt #the dirt cast #the dirt cast imagine #the angry lizard writes

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akseedragon713 · 3 years

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Fic Writer Interview

Tagged by: well i wasn’t tagged but i saw @cyber-phobia doing it

Name(s): AkseeDragon, Aksee, AkseeDragon713

Fandom(s): My Hero Academia mostly. I used to do other fandoms but... i wrote those when i was a baby writer and never posted them anywhere XD

Where you post: AO3

Most popular one-shot (by kudos): For The Children

Huh. I never look at my stats page but this is vaild XD. It was fun to write and a gift prompt I wrote for another writer! Summary: Kurogiri makes a plan to ensure class 1A is as safe as they can be at the USJ because. He doesn’t want to hurt them, they’re just kids.

Most Popular Multi-chap (also by kudos): Emrys the Dragon

Oh geez. My unfinished BBC Merlin wip that haunts me to this day...I’ll add the final part. Eventually. It’s just I started this one in high school and now i’ve graduated and it comes with a lot of personal feels. There’s so many hits....Summary: What changes in the Merlin universe if Merlin can shapeshift into a dragon, and Arthur is a little less oblivious about magic (mostly because of the big dragon that keeps saving his life).

Favorite story you’ve written so far: Awake...?

I have a thing for creepy themes, especially mind control and a healthy fear of the unknown XD. Felt bad for Oboro while writing it but it was worth it!Summary: Oboro wakes up, lost and confused, to the sound of beeping machines. Where is he?

Fic you were nervous to post: Chekov’s Gun

This fic, 100%. It was the most stressful to write and I was so nervous about using guns in a story and wondering how it would be received? Tuns out I was over-thinking. It’s one of my favorite fics, turned out amazing!

Summary: A soft Click! and he turns around.“Ah! Hello-”Bang!The force of the gunshot sends Tomura crashing into the table.

How do you choose your titles: They just come to me. Usually it’s something poetic or punny that has to do with the themes or the characters!

Do you outline? Depends on the fic, but I usually do.

Complete: All my One-Shots XD, Other Brother

In Progress: Through Fogged Eyes, You Should Be Scared Of Me

Coming soon: Mourning and Sky! First chapter is finished, working on the second. It’s going to be a fic about Tomura finding a deaged!Kurogiri to when he was just barely under Sensei’s control.

Not Started: A crack-fic i promised to do for a friend.... sorry jess if you see this XD

Prompts? I’ll write a fic from someone else’s prompt if i like it enough, but most of my prompts are my own.

Upcoming work you’re most excited about: You Should Be Scared Of Me

This fic is a ride to write XD. I hadn’t seen any Possessed Shigaraki Tomura fics at the time, so. I made one myself! Big Manga SpoilersSummary: Why have Tomura’s friends been so weird, since he woke up?Tomura doesn't know what's gotten into them. He doesn't know that Sensei has been walking around in Tomura's body when he's asleep.

No pressure tags: Anyone who wants too! Tag me if you do and maybe I’ll read your fics!

#it me #my fic

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luci-in-trenchcoats · 5 years

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Follow Me Home (Part 7)

Summary: Dean, the reader and Hawkins arrive back in Lawrence but it looks like Jim’s already in town...

Pairing: Cop!Dean x reader

Masterlist

Word Count: 6,000ish

Warnings: language, kidnapping, brief violence

A/N: Enjoy!…

______

“Zeppelin,” said Dean as you hit the edge of Lawrence a day later.

“Motorhead,” said John from the passenger seat.

“Zeppelin.”

“Motorhead.”

“Well, you apparently have two psychopaths for fathers Y/N,” said Dean with a chuckle.

“Zeppelin is not the greatest rock band of all time. Get your facts straight kid. They’re good but not the best. Motorhead is so much better,” he said, turning around in his seat, raising an eyebrow at you. “Get in on this and don’t tell me you’re into just pop rap crap.”

“You’re both wrong. AC/DC,” you said. Dean held up a finger, cocking his head, John shrugging. “That’s a band right? Something about thunder?”

“Yeah, something about thunder,” said John with a smirk, Dean chuckling as he drove. “How’s the memory doing, kiddo?”

“Pretty good. The music helps. Still don’t remember Monday night but there’s less gaps, I know random stuff. Work, college. Apparently I also have had a lot of boyfriends,” you said, John and Dean frowning. “I’m just messing with you. Only a few and none particularly long.”

“Thank god it wasn’t three girls,” he said, shaking his head. “Granted, I missed a lot.”

“If you could not punch Dean anymore I’d appreciate it,” you said.

“Yeah, yeah,” he said, giving Dean a smile. “So how many girlfriends have you had, Dean?”

“You don’t get to be the scary dad intimidating his daughter’s boyfriend. I’m still on the fence about arresting you for all of the break ins,” said Dean.

“There’s got to be some kind of perks to my daughter dating a cop, right?” he said with a smirk.

“We’re barely calling you John. You got a ways to go before you get to dad status I’m pretty sure,” said Dean.

“So they’re all there in town?” you asked Dean. “Lila and Luke and Kyle?”

“Yeah, Sammy said they’re at the station. The boys got in this morning. We got a lot to get through so we can hold off on meeting them if you don’t want,” said Dean.

“I don’t know if I want these people’s first impression of me to be…” you said, glancing down at yourself.

“They don’t care, Y/N,” said John. “I promise. But whatever you want is okay. Mom and I waited a long time. We can wait a few more hours.”

“I just want to say hi quick,” you said.

“We can do that,” said Dean. “We’ll just-”

He slammed on the brakes and all three of you felt your seatbelts snap you back. Dean put both hands on the wheel, John breathing hard. You shook your head and were about to ask what happened when you looked through the windshield.

“Is that what I think it is?” said Dean.

“It looks like a police barricade,” said John, glaring at Dean. “I thought you trusted me.”

“That’s Lawrence City police. I’m chief over at Midland. Different force,” said Dean.

“So people that Jim can get to stop me without even doing a thing himself,” he said.

“Dean what…” you said, spotting two cars block the road behind you.

“Play his game,” said John, opening the glove compartment and grabbing a pair of zip ties. “Pretend I’m the bad guy. I won’t say a word. If he still thinks you’re on his side, it might buy you some time.”

“But…” you said, Dean nodding back at you.

“Sorry but I got a new plan,” said Dean. “Everybody hold on.”

Dean floored it into reverse, the car flying backwards through a narrow gap before he spun it around.

“What the…” you said, Dean taking a deep breath as he took off.

“I was really good at all of the driving courses at the academy. Broke a few records. Better than these guys I bet,” said Dean, taking a right and trying to take the long way around to Midland.

“What the hell are you doing!” shouted John. “Jim will-”

“There’s a very good chance that the second you were in custody, somebody that isn’t a cop slips in and kills you off too. She just got her parents back, her family back. I’m not having that taken away so fast,” said Dean.

“I don’t matter! She does! I thought we were on the same page!” shouted Jim.

“Dad,” you said, John’s head whipping around to you. “We trust you. Trust us. Please. It’ll be okay.”

“You don’t know that,” he said.

“My entire life has been a lie it tuns out. But I trust Dean and his brother and his force. I trust you too so listen to me. Calm down and we’ll get to the station and we’ll find a way to catch Jim,” you said.

“Drive faster,” he said to Dean. You felt yourself slip back in your seat more, Dean crossing the yellow line more than once as he drove.

“Ha,” said Dean as you heard sirens in the distance. “I knew those suckers wouldn’t catch up.”

You held onto the door as he turned the car down a side street, the station showing up in the distance.

“Dean!” you shouted, John echoing the sentiment when you saw a city police cruiser come out from a side street right behind you. “You were saying?”

“Shit,” said Dean as he drove. “John, you got to run inside. Y/N, you too. Tell Sam to lock it down the second you’re inside. The building will lockdown before the city cops get here. I’m probably going to get my ass handed to me but as long as you two get inside, it’s fine. It’ll give us enough time to explain it all.”

“What’s the-” you said before Dean nearly plowed into the front of the building.

“Go! Now!” he shouted. You and John ripped off your seatbelts and sprinted out of the car, the siren going off loudly as you heard shouting.

You heard a car crash behind you and you spun around, John nearly at the door.

“Y/N!” he shouted as you saw an officer holding up a gun at you.

“Tell Sam!” you said, positive making a move for the door would be a bad idea. “Go! I’ll be fine.”

It was hard to hear over all of the noise but you heard metal clank against the ground. Looking over your shoulder you saw a wall of metal had come down over the front door, John nowhere in sight.

“Ow,” you groaned as you were shoved to the ground by an officer. Less than ten seconds later you were cuffed and hauled to your feet, plopped down on the sidewalk as a grunting Dean was sat next to you.

“I thought I said both of you get inside,” whispered Dean.

“The cop was too fast. At least John got in. Jim won’t do anything to me. I think,” you said.

“Be careful,” said Dean as an officer shoved his shoulder. “Fuck off, Paul!”

“What the fuck are you doing running around with a criminal like that, Chief?” said Paul.

“It’s complicated,” said Dean, the both of you hauled to your feet as a swarm of new cars hit the end of the parking lot.

“I bet,” said the officer, nodding at his partner as they shoved you in the backseat of their vehicle. You saw Paul punch Dean in the face, just in time to feel something hard hit your own. You gasped and fell down in the seat, something dark and heavy tossed over you. “You two don’t move now.”

“I have a feeling we’re not going to the station,” said Dean, the officer shouting outside about having runners. Two car doors opened and slammed shut, the car quiet for a moment before it took off. “Guys don’t do this. Jones is a bad guy.”

“He’s a very wealthy bad guy,” said one. You and Dean shook off the blanket and sat up by the time you were down a different road.

“He’s going to kill us,” said Dean. “Do you two really want that on you for a little bit of money?”

“I wouldn’t call five hundred grand a little bit of money,” said the officer.

“Each,” said the other. “The guy just wants back his daughter. We know you’ve been lying to her. She’s got freaking head trauma. You’re lucky we don’t kick your ass ourselves for what you did, Winchester.”

“He didn’t do anything, I swear,” you said, the officers rolling their eyes. “I swear! Don’t do this!”

“We’re fucked,” said Dean, kicking at the back of their seats. “These are two of the dirtiest cops in Lawrence. Shit, Y/N. You fuckers. Don’t be idiots. He’s going to kill us, both of us. You’re shitheads but not murderers.”

“Remember when you filled up my locker in high school with-”

“For fucks sake Ron! For the last time that wasn’t me and it was fucking tenth grade!” said Dean.

“It’s five hundred grand Dean. They don’t give a shit,” you said. You slid over on the seat and rested your head on his shoulder. Dean parted his lips but you moved your hands to his own, sliding your switchblade over to him. “We’re on our own.”

He nodded when you looked up at him, Dean pretending to sigh as you leaned forward, quickly seeing that you’d cut nearly all the way through the ties. A sharp tug would be more than enough to break free.

Fifteen minutes later you stopped at an old farmhouse, the officers shoving you and Dean out of the backseat and into a barn before leaving.

“You ran off on me, Y/N,” said Jim, a scowl on his face as he walked out from the shadows.

“Jim, I say we let bygones be bygones. We got a huge problem,” said Dean. “Hawkins is here. He found us in Seattle. We’ll admit, you freaked us out with the whole drugging thing but we got sloppy and he found us and he caught up to us just outside of Lawrence and-”

“Dean. You’re not as good as coming up with stories as I am. Don’t insult my intelligence,” said Jim. He walked over in front of you, kneeling down. “The real question is what kind of lies having you been telling my daughter.”

“What? You’re my dad?” you said, a flash of confusion on Jim’s face almost making you smile. “What?”

“What happened to her?” barked Jim. “She was getting better last I saw her.”

“Don’t,” you mumbled, Jim cocking his head at you.

“I said what happened,” said Jim.

“...Hawkins caught up to us like I said. She...she hit her head in the scuffle. She’s not been great and then one of those cops just hit her again so for all I know, she’s even worse,” said Dean.

“You’re my dad? What’s...where’s my mom?” you asked, glancing around, trying your best to look as pathetic as possible.

“I thought you were going to protect her,” said Jim. “Look at her. Made her a liar like yourself. I know you’re lying, Jane.”

“Fine. My name is Y/N,” you said, Jim smirking as he stood in front of you. “Asshole.”

“You’re stronger than you look,” he said, pushing up his jacket sleeve, showing off a few long and nasty nail marks that dug deep into his skin. “Hurt like a bitch. I grabbed you from your motel room that night. One little knock to the head. You woke up as I was hauling you through the woods out there. You put up a hell of a fight, especially for a brain damaged person. You took a dirty shot and by the time I was on my feet, you were gone. I thought I was so fucked when I couldn’t find you again. Then you showed up on the news, came right on home to me. I almost killed you two at the park but she was so...naive. You had no idea what had happened. I still had my little girl. Until of course the cop over here had to ruin everything. So I’m going to offer you a choice. You can either both die, or I can have my little girl again and maybe get you a friend.”

“What?” you said, Jim walking over to an old tool bench and picking up a hammer.

“I figure a whack or two will make you two nice little stupid things that will forget all about this. We can either go that route or you die,” he said.

“I’ll die, thanks,” you said.

“I second that,” said Dean.

“Figured you’d say that,” he said, walking in front of Dean. Jim brought the hammer down fast. Dean dodged most of the hit thankfully, only getting a scrape on the cheek as he rolled out of the way. When he got to his feet, his hands were in front of himself and he was holding the knife out.

You both froze when you heard a gunshot ring out. Jim hit the ground and Dean held up his hands, your own going up after you broke out of the restraints. You slowly turned around, dropping your hands when you saw a few officers and John holding a fancy looking gun.

“Sniper school,” said Dean.

“Sniper school,” he said. John handed the gun back to an officer and you saw Sam pull up in a car. “Your little brother almost didn’t believe me.”

“We’re glad he did,” said Dean as Sam walked over and gave him a hug. “Don’t go mush on me. You gotta go arrest Nelson and Brooks from the city.”

“You serious?” said Sam.

“Yes! Now go. My head is still throbbing,” said Dean, rubbing his sore temple as you walked over.

“At least I know my birthday,” you said.

“Cute,” said Dean, both of you watching John almost step forward. “I think you can give her a hug.”

“Thanks,” you said, meeting John halfway there, almost getting lifted off of the ground. “How’d you convince them to give you a gun?”

“Best shot here,” said Sam as he rolled his eyes at his radio. “The dumbasses are on the run.”

“Hey Irv,” said Dean, cocking his head as an older man in a city uniform entered the barn. “Want to go catch those two crooked city boys for us little hick town cops?” said Dean with a smirk.

“Never gonna hear the end of this am I,” said Irv as he shook his head. “Yeah, we’ll get ‘em. This is gonna be a fun court case.”

“I’m sure it will be,” said Dean, John finally releasing you, rubbing his hands up and down your arms.

“You okay?” he asked as he stared at your cheek.

“Yeah. Ironically the hit to the face helped some,” you said, turning towards Dean. “You used to let me win at hide and go seek when we were little.”

“Yes, I did,” said Dean. “Let’s keep the head injuries to a minimum though.”

“I’ve got to agree with that,” said John. “You sure you’re okay?”

“She used that switchblade to get us both free and bought us some time playing dumb. I’d say she’s doing a lot better than expected,” said Dean.

“I could really go for some McDonald’s actually,” you said. Dean smiled, John raising an eyebrow.

“Uh…” said John, looking at Dean.

“The girl likes her breakfast foods,” laughed Dean.

“It’s dinnertime,” said John.

“All day breakfast,” you said.

“Told you she’s fine,” said Dean, handing you back your switchblade. “Want to head to the hospital now?”

“At least I’ll be wearing pants this time,” you said. John blinked slowly, looking between you. “We’ll explain on the way.”

“Hey,” said Dean, rattling his fingers on your hospital door as you changed into a pair of sweats from the police department a few hours later, almost midnight by the time they were releasing you. “Ready to head to the station?”

“I think I already gave my statement like fifteen times,” you said. Dean smiled as he came in, your rain jacket tucked under his arm.

“Your family’s staying at the Marriott but they’re still at the station. We don’t have to do this tonight if you don’t want,” said Dean.

“Is John in trouble? For killing Jim?” you asked.

“It’s a little messy since he’s not a cop but given the circumstances, he likely saved both our lives by taking a shot no one else could have made. Given his service record and everything that went down, they’ll let him go without any charges,” said Dean. “There’s a lot of stuff to clean up, a lot of people your...people Jim paid off. John’ll get a clean record by the time it’s all said and done. Oh. There is one slight benefit to this situation, Ms. Jane Jones.”

“What?” you asked.

“Jim. He was your dad. He’s got a will. It seems that in the heat of the moment and all, he never removed you from it. You’re set to inherit an assload of money,” said Dean with a smile. “I get the feeling the Hawkins family doesn’t have much. Maybe you’ll be able to help out your folks a little.”

“For sure. This has been the longest week of my life but I got a few good things out of it,” you said, ripping off your hospital band. “You. A nice inheritance. A family. I know it’s late and I’m nervous but I want to meet my family. My real family.”

“Alright,” said Dean, holding out a hand. You slid yours into it and gave him a smile.

“Will you stay?” you asked. He kissed your temple, smiling back at him.

“Yes, I will be there with you, sweetheart,” he said. “You don’t have to do it on your own.”

“Thank you, Dean.”

“Alright, guys,” said Sam as he opened up the conference door at the station half an hour later. You saw John, Lila, Luke and Kyle all sat around the table. “Take as long as you need.”

Sam gave you some privacy as Dean slipped in behind you, standing by the door as Lila stood up.

“Hi,” you said. She practically sprinted over and tackled you, squeezing you far too tight. “Mom. Air.”

“Sorry,” she said, barely letting go as she gave you a big smile and kissed your cheek. “You grew up so pretty. Did you see her eyes, John? They’re just like yours.”

“I saw Lil,” he said with a soft smile, turning his head. “Boys. You want to say hi to your sister?”

“Hi,” they both said as they stood up, both a bit nervous looking.

“Hey,” you said, Lila walking you over to them. “Luke and Kyle?”

“I’m Luke,” said the shorter one.

“I’m Kyle,” said the other, smirking at his brother. “He’s short.”

“Am not. I’m like six foot, freak,” said Luke.

“Boys,” said Lila.

“Sorry,” they both said.

“So you’re like not dead?” said Luke. You smiled and nodded. “Cool.”

“Beats the alternative,” you said, looking around. “So...this is weird.”

“To be honest, Luke and I always thought you were dead,” said Kyle, turning to Luke. “Sucks for you. You gonna get middle child syndrome now or something?”

“You took one psych class last semester and now you’re a know it all,” said Luke. “Our brother is kind of a dorky loser just an fyi.”

“Says the guy who plays dungeons and dragons,” said Kyle.

“I saw you looking at the rule book, dork,” said Luke.

“You both kind of sound like dorks to me,” you said, both of them giving you bitch faces. “We done with the awkward crap now?”

“Twenty bucks she thinks you’re the bigger loser,” said Kyle.

“Deal. Christmas we’ll have an official ruling,” said Luke.

“Is this what it’s like having brothers?” you asked Dean.

“Pretty much,” said Dean, John standing up and walking over.

“Look at ‘em. Already trying to be their big sister’s favorite,” he teased.

“I’m not really used to this big family thing,” you said as Lila gave you another hug. “I’m pretty sure I’ll get used to it though.”

“Well Thanksgiving is next week and we will make all of your favorites,” said Lila.

“Mom’s side of the family is pretty big,” said Kyle. “Hey, can we like surprise everyone that Y/N’s actually alive?”

“Uh, let’s give everybody a heads up. I’m sure it’ll still be a surprise,” said John, your gaze going back to Dean. “Your boyfriend can come too.”

“You have a boyfriend?” asked Lila as she looked back at Dean. “Oh, he’s cute.”

“He looks like he got the shit beat out of him,” mumbled Luke.

“He’s a good guy,” said John as your stomach grumbled. “You ever get those pancakes?”

You shook your head, Dean chuckling.

“I’ll be back with some grub for you guys. Y/N, call me if you need anything,” said Dean.

“I will, Dean.”

“You sure you want to be here tonight?” asked Dean as you stepped out of his bathroom after your shower, nearly three in the morning by the time you left the station with plans to meet up for lunch the next day.

“Yeah. Those guys are exhausted and I need a minute to decompress,” you said. You fell down onto his bed, curled up in one of his t shirts. Dean grabbed your shoulders and tucked you into his side, his lips pressing against your temple. “My parents said I could live with them if I wanted.”

“You don’t need to make any decisions right now,” said Dean nuzzling his cheek against yours.

“I don’t know where home is anymore,” you said as you lifted your gaze to his. “Here. Seattle. Kansas City with my parents. My whole life has been…”

“Why not all three?” asked Dean. You cocked your head and he chuckled. “You’re loaded now, Y/N. I know you liked Seattle. But I know you want to be close to your family. Live in all three if you want.”

“What’re you going to do?” you asked.

“I liked Vancouver.”

You laughed and he gave you a sweet kiss, giggling to himself.

“Sorry. I had to. I’m a Kansas boy though. This place ain’t perfect but it’s my home,” he said.

“What do you think I should do?” you asked.

“This is going to sound a certain way so try not to take it like that,” said Dean. “But I think...you should take a breather from this place for a little while. Go home to Seattle, figure out work and all the stuff with Jim. Find a place you actually like, somewhere you can watch the rain. Then go home to your parents, meet your family. You and me, we’ll be okay. It’ll give me some time to plan the perfect date.”

“I’m not so helpless anymore, Dean. I can remember most everything now and the stuff I can’t, I don’t think it matters,” you said. “You don’t have to stay if you don’t want.”

“If there’s one thing I am absolutely positive about sweetheart, it is that you have never been helpless. Even when Jim attacked you back on Monday night, hit your head so hard you couldn’t remember, you still outsmarted him. You got away. You’re not helpless and that’s not why I like you,” he said.

“I know why I like you,” you said. “Because you never made me feel like some weak victim. We were partners.”

“I don’t really know why but you made me feel safe. I get what your dad was talking about back in the hunting cabin with your mom. She made him feel better. I get that,” he said.

“You want to come to thanksgiving?” you asked.

“Only if there’s pie,” he chuckled.

“I love baking on a rainy day,” you said.

“I think we’ll have to make a few trips up to Seattle,” said Dean, sighing when his phone rang. “That’s my dad.”

“Go ahead,” you said, Dean reaching over and picking it up.

“Hey dad,” he yawned. “How was the vacation?”

“It was great. The dehumidifier is overflowing,” he said. You laughed when Dean rolled his eyes. “Is this funny to you?”

“Dad, I’ve had a hell of a week,” said Dean, throwing an arm over his face, his smile poking out from under it. “I will take an overflowed dehumidifier any day.”

“Dean. You alright?” he asked.

“Yeah. I’ll talk to you guys tomorrow. I promise,” said Dean.

“You sure you’re okay?” he asked.

“Mhm. I’m beat so we’re going to head to bed. I love you. Say night to mom for me,” said Dean.

“Love you too, Dean,” he said before Dean hung up.

“He didn’t sound mad,” you said.

“He’s not, not really,” said Dean as he tossed his phone down and turned off the light. “Dad’s are funny sometimes. You know...my dad’s name is John too. He was a marine actually.”

“I bet they’ll get along great,” you said, snuggling down into the pillows. “I’m exhausted.”

“Can’t sleep though?” he asked. You nodded your head and felt his hand on top of yours, your eyes flickering up. “How about a head massage?”

“That sounds pretty good,” you said, turning into his touch.

“Relax for me sweetheart. It’s over. I promise.”

Four Days Later

“Hello pretty girl,” said Dean when you answered the phone. You smiled and walked over to the window in your apartment. “How’s it going?”

“It is absolutely pouring outside,” you said. “I got the last of the boxes packed up in my apartment. There’s a cute little vacation house I was thinking of checking out after lunch before my flight back. It’s near the water. Maybe you could come visit over the holidays.”

“I could certainly do that,” he said. “We still on for your parents place for Thanksgiving tomorrow?”

“For sure. I...I was doing some thinking on the plane ride up here,” you said. “About what you said about living different places.”

“Oh yeah? You figure that out already?” he asked.

“Not at all,” you said, Dean chuckling into your ear. “I’m still learning my brother’s favorite colors and sports teams. I got a long ways to go before I feel like I have a handle on things again.”

“Well, they’re from Kansas City. I’d say the Kansas City Chiefs are a safe bet,” said Dean.

“Thanks, genius,” you laughed, plopping down on the window seat. “I realize now why I don’t have a lot of friends up here.”

“Jim wanted you all for himself,” said Dean. “You know, you can stay in Seattle if you want, sweetheart.”

“I’ve discovered in the day that I’ve been up here that I like Seattle a lot more when you’re here too,” you said.

“You know...the house I’m renting...there’s room for two if you know anyone looking for a roommate,” he said.

“You have a two bedroom house, one of which is acting as your office and is filled with boxes,” you said.

“Like I said, plenty of room,” he said and you knew he was smirking on the other end.

“Well if you’re gonna twist my arm like that,” you laughed.

“Is that a yes?” he asked.

“Yeah,” you said. “I got dinner with my old boss yesterday and he understands why I’m leaving the firm. He said he’d write me a recommendation for anywhere I wanted to work.”

“Well that’s good. Still, weren’t you planning on taking a little time off to get to know your family? Your brother’s are on winter break soon aren’t they?” said Dean.

“Yeah. I think I’ll hold off until the new year before I think about a job again,” you said, resting your head against the window. “It’s really coming down out there. I think I left my raincoat at your place too.”

“No you didn’t,” he said.

“Yeah I-” you said, a knock coming at your door. “There’s someone at the door.”

“Maybe it’s the cops,” he said as you stood up.

“I hope it’s not Broch,” you laughed. “Guy’s an ass.”

“A total ass,” said Dean as you walked over. “I’ll call you back.”

“Okay…” you said as you put your phone away. You pulled open the door, biting back your smile.

“Hi,” said Dean, his raincoat soaked, your own tucked under his arm.

“How the hell did you get here?” you asked, Dean stepping inside and giving you a kiss.

“Plane. Broch’s big case turned out to be something after all,” said Dean. “Plus you sort of forgot your coat at home. I had to bring it up for you.”

“I missed you,” you said.

“Me too,” he said, chuckling when you hugged him and got your shirt wet. “Can I take you to lunch? I hear there’s this cute little vacation house for sale. Maybe we could check that out after.”

“I’d love to,” you said, running a finger down his jaw. “How was the plane ride?”

“I went to the doctor, got something for it. Way better this time around,” said Dean. “Gonna have to get used to it at some point considering I see a few trips up here happening.”

“We are pretty far from everything, Dean,” you said. “We don’t have to travel this far again.”

“No we don’t. But this is where I let myself fall for you. I like it here. And I’d like to take you back to that pretty park sometime soon,” said Dean. “Without the threat of dying hanging over our heads.”

“That would be nice,” you said, looking him up and down. “You know...I haven’t had sex with you yet.”

“Is that an invitation?” he laughed as you started to tug him back into the apartment. “I thought you were all done packing.”

“Are you saying you don’t want to have sex and then go do that other stuff?” you teased.

“Oh no,” he said, slipping out of his shoes, dropping his jacket on the floor while you pulled him back towards your bedroom. “I am perfectly okay with all the sex.”

“Good because I remember how amazing that mouth of yours is,” you said, grabbing his flannel and pushing it off his shoulders.

“I’m using more than my mouth this time,” said Dean. “I’m assuming you have-”

“Fuck,” you said, dropping your head against his chest. “Where are those condoms we bought?”

“Pretty sure we left them in the rental car at that rest stop,” he said.

“We are so having sex tonight after we fly home,” you said.

“Well...nothing says we can’t have a teaser,” said Dean, resting his hands on your hips.

“We could definitely...ah crap,” you said, running your hand over your face. “I may have forgotten that my parents are in town and I promised I’d meet them for lunch at noon.”

“Guess we’re gonna have to raincheck yet again on some fan freaking tastic sex,” said Dean.

“Sorry for riling you up. I don’t want to be late. They’re only a tad bit paranoid. Understandably,” you said with a smile.

“There’s plenty of time for us later. So what are they in town for?” asked Dean.

“Some of that clearing up my dad’s name stuff. They’re also a wee bit paranoid to leave me on my own since I wasn’t hanging out with you. I barely convinced them to get their own hotel room,” you said.

“I can’t imagine how they feel,” said Dean, touching the end of your braid. “Or how you feel.”

“Strangely, okay. I remember getting more and more suspicious of Jim over the past few months. It was little things I started to put together. He was actually quite controlling. I never realized. I always thought he was just an overprotective father,” you said.

“Back in that motel room when we met your actual dad for the first time, you knew Jim’s story was bullshit, didn’t you,” said Dean.

“After he stopped kicking your ass,” you teased. “But yes. Something about the way he looked at me, was towards you, it was strange.”

“He loves you. Like I said, I can only imagine what seeing you again is like for your parents,” said Dean.

“Are you close with yours?” you asked.

“I butted heads with my dad when I was younger but we worked through it. I think I know why you’re probably doing okay though,” said Dean.

“Why’s that?”

“You were raised by two crazy people, Y/N. But your real family, they’ll love you the way people are supposed to. Unconditionally. I think you know that deep down you’re better off,” said Dean.

“I know I am,” you said, Dean brushing his thumb over your cheek. “It’s fading away.”

“Battle wounds,” said Dean, bumping his nose against yours. “Want to head out?”

“You coming with?” you asked.

“Obviously. Wherever you go, I’ll follow,” he said.

“Good. We have a knack for finding trouble,” you said.

“Probably best to stick together then,” he said, brushing his lips over yours, delivering a soft kiss. He cupped your cheek, your hands settling on his chest, griping into his shirt. You smiled as you broke apart, Dean returning it.

“Let’s go get some lunch, super cop,” you said.

“After you. Jane,” he said with a smirk. You went to whack him, Dean laughing as he grabbed his flannel and jogged down the hall.

“You better run, Winchester!” you said, laughing as you followed him out. Dean was already in his shoes by the time you grabbed your purse off the counter. He handed you your jacket and you slipped into it, taking a deep breath.

“You okay, sweetheart?”

“Yeah. I’m okay, Dean,” you said. “I’m finally okay.”

______

#supernatural #spn #dean x reader #dean winchester #supernatural fanfiction #dean winchester x reader #dean #winchester #dean spn #au #series #cop!dean x reader

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jcmorrigan · 4 years

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I don’t know if anyone here has been following the saga of my OC’s, which consists of me finally being brave enough to talk about them on Tumblr because what’s the use of guarding characters I don’t even have a manuscript for? And I wanna have fun. But mostly I’ve just been tagging fashion sets that belong to them, and as of late last night, too many prompts

I had been attempting to write a piece that introduces my villains in a SERIOUS manner by showing off the evil circus I plan to house them all in where each has a different tent they devote to an “act” that’s really their brand of villainy (dancing with deadly weapons, serving poison at the drinks garden, slaying innocent monsters for show, training horrific monsters from the deep sea), but I keep slacking on it, and I also keep adding new villains to the mix that would shake up the outline, so that’s stagnant.

But you know what I did figure out? Last night, I found a prompt that asked which of my OCs would go to Wal-Mart at midnight for fun. And my answer was that Alivain (the villainous leader, a smug young man who is not at all a Mozenrath ripoff) would take all his villain bros to Wal-Mart for a legitimate errand run, then turn around and realize they had all immediately scattered and just go “Oh no.” So here, I’m gonna introduce you to my villain squad by telling you what shit they would start in a Wal-Mart

Versafina is a weapons aficionado, so she’s gonna be looking for things that she can add to her repertoire of melee weapons. Especially small things that can fit in her hidden pockets...and not get noticed by security as she smuggles them out without paying. She spends way too long in the hardware section trying to figure out if a socket wrench is as good for scooping out eyes as she thinks.

Phantasia is busy giving herself a makeover in the cosmetics section, being the glam queen she is. She’s also opened it up for any teammates to come up to her and receive makeovers. She’s not paying for any of it either. Phantasia has also tested all the spray perfumes, then ran out of skin to spray, so she dragged Anastasios over. Anastasios is the physically oldest of the group, a rather elderly man who is about done with all these rowdy millennials (he’s just the character that’s there to say “OK Boomer” to), and he wanted to actually shop for the thing Alivain wanted except Phantasia is using him for more test perfume sprays and he won’t admit he likes smelling pretty.

Zangary is my resident monster hunter and also one of the sane men in the group and he probably ACTUALLY went to get what they came for in the first place and paid for it like a normal person, but no one noticed because no one expected anyone to actually do that. (*sweats nervously* Stoic monster hunter who wears purple and is shippable with the attractive sorcerer? I...I didn’t...it’s not the ADJL Huntsman no)

Dweixyn is lazy as hell and just found some patio furniture to collapse into and take a nap. Except she wears sunglasses everywhere she goes for the aesthetic, so the staff members who pass her briefly don’t realize her eyes are shut at first.

Belador wants two things out of life: to blow things up and to party hard. And because it’s probably not a good idea to blow up the Wal-Mart right now, he’s in the process of attempting to arrange several electronics and lamps to create a tiny pseudo-nightclub. He may also have hijacked the PA system for this purpose and is blasting techno.

Yridel is an angsty cyborg. She went right to the electronics section to see how many things she could connect to and corrupt. Eventually, she found a portable speaker through which she could just blast “Born Depressed” by Drill Queen on repeat, because it’s #mood for her, and just starts strutting around the store doing this to show off how edgy she is. Her snooty boyfriend who is usually narcissistic except when it comes to her, Lainnhartt, is following her and tossing confetti or an acceptable substitute in her wake, going, “That is my GIRL!”

Sherida is a monster who has a humanoid body, so she usually wears a bodysuit and a motorcycle helmet to pass among the general public. Well, tonight, she’s decided to take a walk in the mostly-deserted Wal-Mart with her helmet off so she can have a breather, but she came across some midnight shoppers who saw her paper-pale skin with blue veins, her lack of nose, her slit-pupil eyes, and her wide mouth full of fangs, and started panicking. So Sherida did the reasonable thing and began to eat them right there on the floor. Blood everywhere.

Lirian and Calpurniko are two teen girls - though Lirian is actually Fair Folk and has been alive for hundreds of years, but physically and mentally, she’s a teen. Lirian is a yandere and very exciteable; Calpurniko is a doomsday-device mechanic on a constant sugar high. So the two of them head right to the toy aisle to have a Nerf gun fight. Which is all fun and games until Calpurniko disappears into the hardware section for fifteen minutes and emerges with an augmented Nerf that can shoot (poisoned) foam darts at actual ballistic speeds.

Rachneira and Tomagi are also teens. Rachneira is a morbid Goth and also a variant of Fair Folk who is derived from spiders and therefore can spin webbing (and maybe has four arms? Undecided). Tomagi is an angsty sorceress who is mute. So the two of them decide to rifle through the cheap DVD bin, as kids do, and Rachneira keeps pulling out increasingly more disturbing horror films and stating in an ennui-laden tone that Tomagi should probably see them all before she dies. Then security blows by on their way to stop Belador from creating a mini-rave, they realize these kids are with the troublemakers, they turn on them, and Rachneira just webs her way up to chill out on the ceiling for a bit (as you do) while Tomagi gets angry and magically blasts the guards across the entire store, taking out several shelving units.

Diamandian puts on the airs of being a high-society man. What he is is a former manservant who killed his employer and usurped his fortune. He carries a white lace parasol wherever he goes. He heads right to the clothing section for the entire purpose of roasting every piece he finds, ripping it all off the hangers and throwing it to the ground because it’s all “Trash for the peasants!”.

Maraya is a pirate queen who is also an Eldritch Abomination thanks to an ancient tome of horrors. (Pink skin, silver or purple hair, the tattoos she previously had of nautical symbolism are now bright silver, pupil-less glowing eyes, stores a bunch of tentacles in her back.) She has a first mate, Soligeo, who has no eyes and many spidery limbs because he used the same book. Being that they’re pirates, they’re going to steal stuff, and they’re not gonna be subtle about it. They start ransacking the shelves and bragging very loudly about the fact that they will NOT BE PAYING FOR THIS. Unlike Sherida, Maraya doesn’t care so much about covering her monster exterior, and she likes scaring people for fun.

Kaxhalen is an intergalactic alien warlord (blue skin, silver hair) who acts like a stoic in the general public but is secretly neurotic and exciteable. He has sequestered himself in a fort made of bedding with several craft supplies he’s stolen to work on a therapy project.

Osmend Osmodias is a smug gambler, so he just sets up a shell game in the corner of the store and starts charging shoppers to find the hidden bean. When the guards try to oust him for soliciting, he argues that he’s not technically selling anything, and they can’t get anywhere unless they have the right charges on him.

Valencindri is this team’s token idiot and steals the toilet paper out of the men’s room, holding it up in triumph and screaming about how awesome it was that he got away with the (free) toilet paper without having to pay for it (it’s still free)!

Dr. Hope Lessness is a mad-scientist supervillain and sadist with cybernetic augmentations. She at first just starts breaking things at random to cause mayhem and monger fear, but then she hits the electronics section and gets distracted trying to wire together an iPod with a Fitbit and hook them to a drone mechanism that is somehow also a weapon. Her snarky robot companion, Mercy Lessness, makes several cracks about her attention span that she doesn’t dignify.

Orianelle is a biker witch swordswoman who likes to dress in leather shorts and tanks. She heads to the automotive section to pick up supplies to maintain her bike, but then some jerk dudebro makes a pass at her and she suplexes him into the nearest shelf, which causes an outcry. This somehow tuns into a mass brawl with Orianelle knocking ten men unconscious.

EDIT: I forgot Siersyrei on the first go. She’s a werewolf, but the joke is she’s more like a “were-human” because she defaults to acting wolflike even when in human form and refers to herself in the third person. So she’s over here literally eating dog food and looking for any sudden motions indicating prey she can hunt until Lirian shows up with a laser pointer to drive her insane.

By the time security has dispersed enough to actually be a problem, Alivain hijacks the PA system to announce “I’m going to bomb the Wal-Mart,” which is his code word to let the others know that he’s going to bomb the Wal-Mart. Everyone evacuates, and he dramatically activates a bomb that reduces the store to a column of flames as he dances in the parking lot victoriously with his back to the carnage.

Also, Zangary probably bought the wrong thing, so now they have to find a new Wal-Mart and start all over.

#my oc's #blood cw #horror cw #bombing cw #just villains being bros

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spookysweet-heart · 5 years

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Character Reaction

@multifandomgirl99: “The Character reactions were pretty cool love 😊 I don't really have an OC tbh but here are a few things about me. I am a bit Antisocial with a little anxiety. I really love to bake, cook and read. I love hanging out with my older brothers and little sister and I just spend most of my time listening to music or outside with my dogs”

Battle Egos

Natemare: He understands that you’re a bit antisocial but notices you’re also a bit more confident when he's around so he makes sure to be there whenever you go out. Loves listening to music with you, always up for lip singing or actual singing with you whether you’re good or not. Will definitely “help” when you bake, basically, he’s there for moral support and to lick the spoon and just bug you while you mix things together.

Phantom: He offered a contract when he saw how determined you were with baking, but you declined his offer telling him you don’t need help and that you’d do this on your own. lets you stay in his office since you don’t ask questions during his meetings with clients, he has a small space just for you in the office with a comfy couch and mini fridge with snacks whenever you want to just get away from everyday life and be comfortable. Does help out with your family in any way that you need. places for family parties? He’s got it covered. Need money for medical bills or household bills? He’s got you. need groceries? A delivery person will be at your door in the next 20 minutes with your things. He might a bad guy to some but he’s really a sweetheart to those he cares about.

Natpai: He adores you and your dogs, he’s the one you trust the most to dog sit them when you go on family vacations. Will ask if you want to watch anime with him, he’s not much of a talker at first but he does open up as time goes by. Loves actually helping you bake unlike Natemare, Natpai will help by getting the ingredients, mixing them if you need to do something else and helps prepare them for the oven. Speaking of baking, you two will almost always be dancing or singing in the kitchen while you bake, he says music makes baking with you more fun!

Stranger Things

Steve Harrington: He loves spending time with you. he knows how hard it can be being a bit antisocial but he does help you speak up if you need to. Will definitely be a taste tester if you’re working on new recipes, Helps you come up with new ones at times when you’re stuck, has the kids come over so they taste test your treats too. they love it honestly. Whenever you feel overwhelmed he’ll take you for a drive at night to help clear your head. Helps you walk your dogs on Saturdays and Sundays, sometimes dogsits for you on holidays when your family goes out of state.

Nancy Wheeler: This one is just so happy to have another girl in the group. Helps you bake and takes care of your dogs when you need someone to direct them while you get stuff done around the house. Thinks your siblings are fun to be around and doesn't mind having parties where everyone is invited. loves spending time with you at the mall or at the park. she’s always the one you go to when you want new book recommendations or advice about anything.

Jonathan Byers: He’s a bit awkward at first but he warms up to you once he sees you’re actually really nice. love it when you bring him some extra sweets you’ve made. will definitely recommend you some music to listen to. makes you mixed tapes from time to time. just like Steve, Jonathan will take you out on drives and blast out music as you two just sing along.

Marvel

Steve Rogers: He’s a total sweetheart, helps you bake and always lets you use the towers kitchen space when you need more room. Loves your dogs! he’s more like a dad figure to you. you can go to him whenever you need help or advice. Will hurt anyone that hurts you. Dad!Steve is just a softie for you and your siblings. let’s then f=visit the tower but always keeps an eye on them.

Bucky Barnes: Bucky is like an uncle to everyone. teaches you some self-defense with Natasha. Actually helps or supervise while you bake after that one time you burned your hand a bit. loves your dogs to bits. trains them so they know when intruders are in your home. takes you to and picks you up from work. Will take you for ice cream for a drive when you need space to clear your head.

Natasha Romanoff: She loves you to bits but she only shows it when it’s just you two. full on supportive of what you want to do with your future. not one for sweets but she will have one from time to time if you offer her one. helps you take your dogs on walks. loves it when you read to her. Will fight anyone who hurts you.

Peter Parker: Dear sweet peter is like the best friend you never want out of your life. will fight for you, protective as hell. loves your dogs and sweets. will help you bake but will also tun it into a food fight once in a while. loves taking you to rooftops at night with cups of hot chocolate. He's the one that sneaks in through your window when you text him you need someone or just don't want to be alone some nights. gets along with your siblings pretty well actually. He loves showing you all his cool new inventions.

The Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina

Sabrina Spellman: Sabrina loves getting to hang out with you! She helps you with baking, her aunt Hilda also helps you when you’ve got a tough recipe to follow. She loves listening to music in her room with you. she loves your dogs but she knows you can't bring them over because of her cat Salem. She does teach you a few magic tricks and simple spells. gives you good luck charms when you need the confidence boost, or need to relax before a stressful day at work.

Harvey Kinkle: Harvey loves having you around. you’re always the on to show him new music and encourages him to keep up his drawings. He feels great when he’s near you. He understands that sometimes you don’t feel your best when you have to go out so he always makes sure he’s there with you to help. Takes you out on drives at night or walks with you around the woods when you wanna get away from everyone. loves when you bake because you give him the leftovers after everyone had gotten theirs. is willing to taste test anything you make. is super caring. Will fight anyone that hurts you.

Resident Evil

Leon S. Kennedy: Leon loves you! he thinks you’re very sweet and strong. will fight anyone who hurts you. supports you with anything you want to do. He gets the whole anti-social thing so he makes sure you’re alright every time you guys hang out, he loves when you bake for him or give him leftovers. always up for taking care of your dogs. teaches you self defense, and also how to shoot a gun “just in case”.

Claire Redfield: Claire adores you! Considers you an honorary Redfield. Loves baking with you, always up for trying new recipes. She will kill a man if she has to, for protection. She loves your dogs. She and Chris always ask to dogsit when you and your family go on vacation. Whenever you feel stressed she invites you over and you both just hang out and listen to music. You’re always giving her new recommendations.

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manifestoonmoralmanlove · 5 years

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Gormless Ch. 13 – Everything’s awful but lesbians are in fact REAL

A well-meaning friend gave me a book series that is hilariously bad. The first book was Souless and my riffs were entitled brainless. This second book is entitled Changless and these riff are then gormless.

I mean to say I have entitled them gormless! Not that my riffs are dumb, and the effort I spend on them stupid since I’m the only one who enjoys them. HAHA!

The story is SUPPOSED TO be about how a badass lady wearing a rad-looking carriage dress hits baddies with her umbrella and bangs her hot werewolf husband. In reality it’s mostly poor attempts at being witty, flirty, and superior.

For the last book check out the brainless tag.

If you want the TL;DR version but want to read these new riffs anyway?

This story is set in supernatural Victorian steampunk England. Alexia is our NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS protag. She is a soulless, which means she’s able to negate the abilities of vampires and werewolves by touching them. She’s recently married a big oaf, named Lord Connel Maccon. He’s the manchild in charge of the supernatural police with a zillion dollars and he’s totes super hot too ok. Their relationship is mostly arguments about how Maccon can’t tell her fucking anything. Alexia has also recently become head of ~Soulless affairs~ in Queen Victoria’s government. She has a dumb friend named Ivy, a gay vampire friend named Akeldama, a family who’s evil because they do the same shit as her but while being blonde, and most importantly Alexia is better than everyone cause…cause.

Last time on Gormless:

Turns out a preserved corpse of a Soulless person that the Kingair pack stole from Egypt is causing the humanization problem. However somebody is after that coprse, and knocked LeFoux and Lord Maccon unconscious. Alexia gonna have to fix everything herself HURMPH!

Chapter 13 – Everything’s awful but lesbians are in fact REAL

Wowzers! Here’s the climax chapter. It won’t be the height of tension, but it will be the height of my irritated confusion. My apologies for length, it was a long chapter, and full of a lot of bullshit. LET’S GO!

We get a rare good moment where Alexia looks at the passed out Maccon and worries about him. She makes a cute note about how his eyelashes are super long and once when she commented that she was jealous of his long eyelashes he tickled her neck with them. This will be the last genuinely good thing in this chapter.

Alexia goes to a recently woken up LeFoux. LeFoux is all distraught, and there’s a bullshit line about how being upset made her look slightly more feminine and Alexia, “Didn’t know if she liked that.”

CAUSE SADNESS IS A WOMAN DISEASE AND ALEXIA ONLY CARES WHAT LEVEL OF CURRENT FUCKIBLITY YOU ARE! THE LEVEL OF EGOMANIA ON THIS BITCH!

LeFoux is like, “Hey don’t be mad at the woman who shot me and your husband. She didn’t ~mean~ it.”

YES TURNS OUT THE BIG BAD OF THIS BOOK SERIES I FUCKING CALLED BACK IN CHAPTER 4 OF THE LAST BOOK! It was Angelique! GOSH WHAT A FUCKING TWIST! YOU KNOW THE CHARACTER WHO, AT THE END OF THE LAST BOOK WAS DESCRIBED IN TEXT AS A BLATANT SPY! Yet the entirety of this book Alexia thinks its LeFoux and goes so far as to think she’s faking being shot? She turns out of the room and all the werewolves are sleeping and instead of…I DON’T KNOW letting them know she’s identified the attacker? She just huffs that she must do everything herself.

GOD STUPIDITY AND A POINTLESS MARTYR COMPLEX IS REALLY FUCKING HOT! ALSO I’M GLAD THAT EVERY SINGLE WEREWOLF FELT COMFORTABLE FALLING ASLEEP WITH AN ACTIVE SHOOTER IN THEIR CASTLE THAT WAS EVEN ABLE TO PUT DOWN THEIR FORMER ALPHA!

So Alexia goes to the room where the mummy is, but Angelique is not there. So instead of disposing of the body that Angelique is clearly after, she’s runs up to the Aethongrapher room. Angelique is there and shoves her aside to escape the room. So they go back to the mummy room, and Angelique is trying to drag the body out of there. Alexia goes to shoot some of her sleepy darts at Angelique but just as she’s about to Ivy shows up to stand in front of Alexia and whine that Alexia is being callous to her. But as I have described before, this is not Ivy’s fault. Ivy’s kink is inconvenient timing. Blithering obtusely in front of a weapon while the bad guy gets away makes her CUM. The TV hasn’t been invented yet so she can’t stand in front of it during a crucial part of a show/game. SHE HAS TO FIND SOME WAY TO GET OFF!

DO YOU WANT THIS WOMAN TO NEVER ORGASM!?

Despite that Alexia is able to catch up to Angelique and knocks her unconscious with a hefty umbrella swing. She takes the mummy outside, and dissolves it using the acid function on her umbrella. I mean, I was hoping she’d go whole hog and it would come to life and fight them but WELP guess that would be stupid fun and we’re only allowed one of those things in this book and it ain’t fun. When the corpse is just about pudding, Alexia goes back in and hears Ivy scream.

OH NO!

We take a break from this regularly scheduled programming to swap over to Biffy, Channing, and Lyall at the Westminster Hive. Biffy apparently snuck in and broke their Aethonographer. This is just to let us all know that the message Angelique tried to send before didn’t get through. I mean targeting the Aethongrapher only, doesn’t make any sense AT ALL from their perspective and honestly you could have written the entire thing out to tighten up the story. But like I guess it was real important to have that bit where Alexia has to try 2 rooms to find Angelique.

FUCK ME RUNNING!

So Ivy screamed because a woken up Angelique puts a knife to Ivy’s throat and is leading her up the stairs. All the werewolves are there as well as Tunstell. Tunstell gets out the magic gun, which by the way they start calling the ‘tun tun’ which makes a lot of sense and is totes keeping it tense. Shouldn’t it be the tun gun? WHATEVER!

They go up to a room and Angelique makes Ivy open a window. Meanwhile Tunstell tries to sneak around the side while Alexia tries to distract her. By the way this is the first time we hear that Tunstell is apparently a big dude. I had totally assumed that since he was described as a meek servant/actor coated in freckles that he was a 5’5” adorable waif boy who weighs 110 lbs on a good day. I’m glad you waited till now to tell us that. After a bit of a scuffle Tunstell wrestles the knife away, saves Ivy, and Angelique tumbles to her death out the window. The gun is never shot and Chekov leaps out to die on the cold hard Scottish earth like Angelique.

Apparently there was a rope ladder leading down that window that Angelique was really hoping she’d be able to escape down, with the knife to the throat of a hostage? OKAY THEN! When Angelique woke up, why didn’t she just try to make a break for it, to avoid being persecuted by the supernatural police? What was the point of the hostage thing? Why did she have this rope ladder prepared?

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST BOOK! IT’S NOT GOOD ACTION IF THE ENTIRETY OF IT FALLS APART LIKE A BISCUIT IN TEA WHEN YOU ASK LITERALLY ANY QUESTION REGARDING IT!

You know what would have been a thousand times better? If Alexia goes to question a recently recovered Angelique, and Angelique in a panic puts a knife to a dipshit Ivy’s throat by a window. Angelique demands to be given the body. Alexia explains that she destroyed it. Angelique at first doesn’t want to believe it but eventually concedes. Saying something along the lines of, “…If I can’t deliver the body…then…then they’ll kill me…” The people there try to reassure her that they can protect her. However in Angelique’s stunned grief she slips from the window, Tunstell is able to grab Ivy but not Angelique. Was it an accident? Did she want to die on her own terms? WE’LL NEVER KNOW? The chapter ends where the crowd goes to check on her and Angelique is FOR SURE dead. LeFoux seeing the shattered body of her former lover, clutches Alexia and wails.

BUT NOPE IN FACT THIS HAPPENS NEXT!

So Alexia is the only one to go check the body. Angelique is in fact dead, but turns into a ghost. Angelique tells Alexia to perform the exorcism, which means kill her for real real. Alexia wants questions answered first. Angelique says she’ll answer 10, Alexia agrees to this.

So like…why are you going to respect her wishes now? Doesn’t she need to be persecuted under the law, or have proof of the Hive’s wrongdoing? You maybe want to give LeFoux a chance to talk to her, since she was obviously really upset and protective of her before? GUESS NOT!

Angelique, before the questioning is revealed to have done this whole task for the immortality, since she previously and is still working with the Westminster hive. She is GIVEN immortality in the form of being a ghost and is immediately like NOPE I’D RATHER DIE. HUHHHH? MAYBE IT’S NOT IDEAL VAMPIRE THING BUT REALLY?

GOD WHATEVER IT JUST GETS WORSE ANYWAY!

Angelique says that it wasn’t her who tried to break into her bag or poison her. Alexia asks if LeFoux is trying to kill her, Angelique says probably not cause you’d already be dead. AND LIKE WE ESTABLISHED THIS EXACT ANSWER TO THIS SAME QUESTION BEFORE. WHY ARE YOU WASTING YOUR QUESTIONS YOU COMPLETE IMBECILE!

It’s revealed that Quensel, the kid LeFoux was taking poor care of before, is Angelique’s son. Angelique was trying to hide the fact she had a son from the vampires cause the vampires won’t turn her if she has any family. Apparently LeFoux, was trying to get Angelique to take care of her son and to stop the vampire biz by threatening to tell the Vampires about her son. That didn’t work apparently. We also confirm that yes, SHOCK OF SHOCK, Angelique and LeFoux used to be an item for many years. So we have this OH SO DELIGHTFUL paragraph:

“Alexia had seen something of the kind in her father’s collection, but she had never imagined it might be based on anything more than masculine wistfulness or performances put on to titillate a John’s palate. That two women might do such things voluntarily with one another and do so with some degree of romantic love. Was that possible?”

(Irritated Stare with the phrase [stares in gay judgement])

You’re 26 years fucking old, you’re well aware that gay men exist, LeFoux has been hitting on her blatantly this entire book and has been pretty much screaming how much of a lesbian she is. Like you can have Alexia in bi-denial, sure, but for her not to even realize two girls can have sex and romance at one another outside of men JACKING IT!? FUCKING WOW! I want to be clear and say that there is a myth that Queen Victoria didn’t think lesbians were real when she was enforcing the no homosexuality laws. TO BE CLEAR THAT IS A MYTH! PEOPLE IN VICTORIAN TIMES KNEW LESBIANS WEREN’T JUST A MALE CREATED HORNY MYTH LIKE HOW WOMEN LOVE THE TASTE OF JIZZ, YOU THICK-HEADED TWIT!

The last questions that Alexia asks basically are, “Is it possible for women to love each other?” and “You’re a cold bitch aren’t you?” QUEEN PICKED TOP INVESTIGATOR HERE! She then FOR REAL kills Angelique. Also I’m glad she didn’t ask Angelique what they were planning on doing with the humanization corpse, because that mystery is probably what the entirety of the 3rd book is about.

So we head back in the castle to try to wrap this all up, and boy is it pointlessly messy. I’m going to recount the items in order, so you TOO can realize what a clusterfuck this is.

Alexia tells LeFoux that Angelique is dead which makes LeFoux cry. Alexia has a normal human response to seeing a woman she likes grieving.

“Lady Maccon envied her skill of crying with aplomb. She herself went all over splotchy, but Madame Lefoux seemed to be able to execute the emotional state with minimal fuss.”

By performing some pretty sweet mental gymnastics to make it about herself. CONGRATULATIONS! She does later say that the scene was painfully sad…but…your first thought, and the one you dedicate more than a sentence to is… “I wish I could cry as hot as she could?” MOTHER OF FUCK LADY!

Maccon takes Alexia aside and explains that LeFoux and he are besties despite not interacting with her at all this entire book. He told his BFF4EVAH to keep an eye on Alexia. Don’t know why he would have lied about this? Maybe Alexia would have felt patronized? Alexia was attacked 5 times last book and needed to be saved 3 of those times. There’s nothing wrong with that ratio, but there’s also nothing wrong with wanting to have back up if you’re in a dangerous profession. Besides that the two both love science and gadgets, and if he couldn’t predict that LeFoux would awaken his wife’s bisexuality too, it seems silly to lie to her about it.

But my pity for Alexia runs dry again when, upon hearing Maccon and LeFoux are buds…she accuses Maccon of sleeping with LeFoux. And it’s like…

(Honestly, you people, and by that I mean straight people…are ridiculous.)

If Alexia is bi, it don’t matter she’s still in denial and acting like a straight up straighty.

You just found out that lesbians are real and that LeFoux is one of them, and YOU were the one to almost cheat on him with her, and you ACCUSE HIM? Are you FOR REAL!? I mean this is just a set up for Alexia to realize SOME MORE that lesbians are real. I’m glad I’m reading one of those books where everything needs to be explained 5 times.

Alexia brings up the fact that Angelique turned into a ghost but exorcised her right away without considering if literally anybody else wanted to talk to her INCLUDING THE LONG-TERM –EX-GIRLFRIEND WHO WAS RAISING HER KID. LeFoux is rightly upset at this and Alexia retorts with

“There’s no need to wallow.”

Now even Lord Maccon steps in like, “THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, SHE’S RIGHTLY UPSET!” To which Aleixa points out OH SO RIGHTLY that LeFoux didn’t want to be girlfriends with Angelique again, so like…it makes no sense why she’d want to have some parting words or care about her living or dying.

THEN THIS TRANSITION SHEESH VERBATIM:

Lord Maccon looked at his wife appreciatively. “Good Lord, woman, how could you have possibly known that?”

“Well” – Lady Maccon grinned – “Madame Lefoux here did play a bit of the coquette with me while we were traveling. I do not think she was entirely shamming.”

I’m sorry what? We already established that LeFoux is a vagatrian and had a relationship with Angelique. Is she saying the fact she was flirted with PROOF that LeFoux is not in a relationship? Alexia, you were flirting back and you’re married. This is not a brilliant deduction. We only have this transition so that Alexia can brag about almost BUT NOT ACTUALLY cheating on her husband. And like…it’s one thing to take the piss out of him because he’s irrationally jealous. However Alexia herself was like REALLY, REALLY irrationally jealous a second ago and it’s not really irrational since Alexia might have had sex with her if she came to the conclusion earlier that girls can like other girls. SoOOoOOoOOoo great!

We continue to have pissing contests. Maccon is mad that Alexia never told him she was almost poisoned, even though you’d THINK Tunstell would have brought that up to him since he’s his servant and he was the one actually poisoned. LeFoux admits she was looking around for Alexia’s bag and that she wanted the humanization weapon too. However she wants it NOT because she’s in the Hypocras club, but in the Organization of the Brass Octopus (OBO.) The Organization of the Brass Octopus is a secret group of Scientists that is working to curb the power of Supernaturals and that the Hypocras Club was a ~militant branch~ of the OBO. Alexia is bothered that Maccon didn’t tell her about OBO, since YANNO Alexia spent half the book thinking that her crush LeFoux wanted to genocide people like her husband. Which yanno REALLY STOPPED HER FROM A LOT THERE! Alexia tries to ask more questions about OBO and Maccon just answers them all with, “But it’s a secret!”

Really love that Maccon gets super mad when Alexia doesn’t talk to him, but when she asks questions he huffs and won’t tell her. You could maybe argue that since it’s a secret society thing that Maccon shouldn’t tell her. He was sworn to secrecy or some shit. But like also…a branch of this club nearly killed them both… and she’s in charge of the entire English government’s Supernatural balance system….Maybe it’s okay for her to know a little about a powerful organization in that country that’s supposed to do the same thing?

WHATEVER!

We end with LeFoux admitting she was LOOKING FOR Alexia’s bag but never went through it or messed up her room to find it. Alexia for once has a normal reaction which boils down to, “FUCK THIS SHIT!” and storms out. CAUSE WHY BRING UP SHE WAS LOOKING FOR IT AT ALL? That is pointlessly confusing.

So below I made a little chart with how easily it could have been to make this conversation flow better. Even if you want to keep in jealousy pissing contest which is also an EVEN WOMEN WOULD SEX ME STUPID HUSBAND!

I’ll admit I don’t know a lot about editing books…but I feel as if either the editors gave this a soft touch. It seems like a simple fix that could have tightened it up and made it an easier read.

Say something nice Faps:

It was technically a climax

They technically tried to wrap things up

It has been acknowledged that yes LESBIANS ARE REAL

I did genuinely like Alexia having a vulnerable moment looking upon her knocked out husband and feeling protective of him.

#gormless #senseless #riffs #riffing

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