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#just wanted these boys to be friends and love each other for once
skteezcursed · 3 days
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❝0025❞ — j.wy.
PAIRING. jung wooyoung x fem!reader.
GENDER AND WARNINGS. smut. friends to lovers. kinda idiots in love. switch woo. switch reader. teasing. strip poker. mentions of alcohol. pet names (pretty boy, bunny, love, good girl, etc). praising. p in v. unprotected sex (please, do NOT!). oral (mostly fem receiving). creampie. kinda breast play. mostly filth, i'm sorry. lmk if i forgot anything!.
SYNOPSIS. you and wooyoung have always had a thing for each other, but never acted on it, until one day he gets tired of waiting once he notices you want him just as bad as he wants you.
RATING. R (+18) - MDNI.
WORD COUNT. 3,3k.
NOTES. english is not my first language. part of the ateezchella especial. bye ♡.
IMPORTANT. this is a work of fiction, it has zero intent on portraying how any of the people quoted here are in real life.
CREDS. dividers by cafekitsune ♡
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The idea that something could be so infuriating and exhilarating at the same time was confusing to say the least, but that was how you felt whenever Jung Wooyoung would look at you, the eyes that held a teasing and menacing gaze at the same time they burned to your skin as if you were the most beautiful thing he has ever seen. In all truth, you were, and he was expecting to make that known to you that night as he had managed to convince you to play a game of strip poker, the drinks you had earlier not helping one bit at keeping your judgment clear. 
It’s not that you were bad at card games, no, you were amazing at them, except when you had something – or several – to drink, which was now the case. Although Wooyoung wasn’t too far behind you in being intoxicated by the alcohol, he seemed to have kept his cool, almost sober as the cards were dropped and clothes started to fill in the floor you two were in, thanking heavens that you were alone with him at the comfort of your house, at the same time trying to ignore how the pool that was forming in between your legs kept getting more annoying as the time passed and your clothes were on the floor while he still had his pants and one sock on.
  “Oh, look at that…,” the grin that took over his lips made you want nothing more than to rip it out as you groaned loudly looking at the cards he was showing, winning again. “C’mon pretty, take some piece off.”
“I fucking hate you,” his laugh reverberated through the room as he watched you take one of your socks, trying your best to push away the cold that involved you as you were only in your lingerie. Sensing the disappointing look Wooyoung sent your way, you hid your smile trying to calm your heart. “Be ready to take off some pieces next time, you are gonna lose!”
The smirk was quickly back into his lips as he picked the cards shuffling them around his hands, as you forced your eyes to not stare at them, not to imagine how good they always looked on your thigh or how flustered you always were whenever Wooyoung was bold enough to touch you a bit longer and in a daring way. The truth was, you’ve always had a thing for Wooyoung, if you were honest, how could you not? He was the perfect mix of a gentleman and a menace, but never going as far as making you uncomfortable, whenever a slight hint that you were annoyed by his antics, he would stop and apologize to you. The fact he was a touchy person didn’t help keep your feelings at bay as you grew closer. 
As the cards were thrown, you tried your best to keep your poker face and legs crossed – the latter so he wouldn’t be able to see the wet patch on your underwear. Wooyoung was already cocky enough about all the attention he got, although he got shy, you knew he enjoyed teasing the living shit out of you whenever someone would compliment him or indicate they wanted him, but curiously enough, he never gave them another second of his attention, just politely declined and kept on with whatever it was that your group was doing, also leaning closer to you, even if it was to tease how many gorgeous women and men wanted him. 
Although you wanted to deny, you loved how he would decline all the offers that came his way. You weren’t much of a jealous type, but you were definitely a possessive one, as much as you wanted to tell your brain you shouldn’t be like that towards Wooyoung. Whenever he would tease about that, you’d play it out by saying that’s how you were with all your friends, receiving a laugh from Wooyoung as you felt his hands linger on your body, sometimes he would talk back against your ear, others he would pull you closer with some excuse, and on rare occasions he would just stay like that, fingers burning on your skin as the tip of his fingers would lightly caress your exposed skin. 
“YES! Told you I’d win!” You cheer with excitement as you draw your cards laughing loudly at his pout as his eyes bore into your figure and you notice a small smirk appear on his lips before he gets up, eyeing you with that menacing glare. “No, I don’t care what you say, I’ll win the next ones too and -”
As his fingers went to the buttons of his pants, your voice stopped at once, eyes ignoring the apparent tent that was there. Once his fingers found the zipper, your eyes averted to the ground, specifically to his feet that still had one sock, which brought an inquisitive look to your face, turning into shock as his pants fell at his feet before he took them out completely kicking them somewhere along with his shirt, the sock joining it not long after, bringing your eyes to finally look up, straight into his face, as the tongue was in between his lips along with the growing grin that made you clench your thighs together. 
The movement did not go unnoticed as you saw Wooyoung’s eyebrows rise and fall before he took a few steps closer to you, noticing finally how you had your legs up to your chest cursing at yourself as you realized he probably saw the wet patch in your underwear. As he lowered himself in front of you, the maximum you would allow your eyes to wander off was up to his chest, the tattoo on his ribs finally visible for you to see, for you to touch, to –
“My eyes are up here bunny,” luckily, you only clenched your own cunt and not your legs as the pet name reached your ears, as your eyes found his predatory ones, the smirk with a slight gap between his lips, allowing you to see his tongue moving inside his mouth… God, you needed it in – “still need to go a bit further up,” his finger found your chin bringing your eyes to finally meet his and stay there. “That’s it, I like when you look at me, especially when it’s like that.”
“Fuck off,” you push his hand away and turn your legs around in front of you, still covering the growing wetness between your legs, making Wooyoung chuckle before he returns to his position, “why didn’t you take your socks off, you are supposed to only take one piece of clothing.”
“Are you complaining, love?”
You rolled your eyes as you pointed to the cards in between you two, ignoring his grin as his fingers nimbly organized the cards, ignoring how his eyes were fixed on you.
“You're scared you will lose?” 
The scoff that came from Wooyoung made you finally eye him as he finished organizing the cards. “I was planning on suggesting something for the grand finale.”
“You definitely scared to lose though, you were the idiot who took two pieces of clothing, while -”
“You would do the same if you had noticed how hard my cock is as it only got harder as I saw how wet your cunt is,” that shut you up at the same instant, the deck of cards being left on the coffee table as his eyes never left you, the smirk growing as his tongue wet his lips, sitting cross legged in front of you as his hands found his thigh, chuckling as he noticed you finally noticing his hard cock against his underwear. “Are you still gonna pretend you don’t find me attractive and that you don’t want to fuck me as badly as I want to fuck you?”
  “Wooyoung, look -”
“What do I have to do for you to understand I don’t see you as a friend and that I want you to be mine?” As your eyes averted from his, you could hear the movement and see it from the peripheral view, only to get his hands on your chin, making you eye him as he towered above you, trying to ignore how his hard clothed cock was inches away from you. “I never wanted to be just your friend and I sure as fuck ain’t blind not to notice how you react to me, so are you gonna be a good girl and let me fuck you senseless before becoming officially mine, or you still gonna be fucking brat?”
Instead of responding you palmed his clothed cock watching as his mouth opened with a gasp as you squeezed gently the length, his hands moving from your chin to caress your cheek as you smirked at each other.
“Tell me again how badly you want me, Wooyoungie.”
As you said that, both your hands moved to the waistband of his underwear, pulling slowly as you sustained eye contact with him, until you noticed that the tip of his red angry leaking cock was finally seen. Making you eye him before moving your face closer to his hip bone, leaving a tender kiss there as you slowly moved towards his cockhead, watching as it twitched slightly, his chest going up and down rapidly, making you giggle before your lips touched the tip making him groan loudly. 
  “Fuck you are gonna torture me?”
“I told you what I want, if you give it me, I’ll give it to you,” another kiss on his cockhead makes him throw his head back groaning before his hand go to the back of your head, your hair getting tangled within his fingers, “it’s a fair trade don’t you think, pretty boy?”
“Fuck I knew you were gonna be my end the day I laid eyes on you, bunny,” at that, you finally took the rest of his underwear, making his cock slap you in the face, making you giggle before holding it with one of your hands, putting just the tip inside, feeling his precum on your tongue before squeezing lightly the base of his cock. “Fuck, you are such a fucking tease, the way you’d sway your hips, how you always wear something that shows skin just to have my hands on you trying to take those fuckers who just want to fuck you away -”
“But you are one of the fuckers who want to fuck me, aren’t you Wooyoungie?”
“The difference between me and them my dear bunny, is that I can fuck you senseless and you’d still come begging for more, because you are just as desperate for my cock as I am for your cunt.”
At that he forced your head down his cock making you gag as you took him all in, tapping his thigh after a while, feeling him pull your head back and up, as his lips finally met yours. It was sloppy, desperate, lustful, it was all you both wanted and more and you felt him pulling you closer, his other hand found your waist going up your back to unclasp your bra, but never leaving your lips, not even when he felt your hardened nipples against his chest, pulling you closer to his, letting his cock press against your stomach.
You tried to put your hand in between you two, but he wouldn’t let you, keeping you firm against him as his tongue explored your mouth, God the amount of time you imagine those lips against yours, leaving wet traces until it finally found itself between your legs with your hands on his hair as he ate you out. 
“Be a good girl and sit on the couch, legs spread open,” he was as out of breath as you were, yet you complied taking off your bra first, but he stopped you as your hands went to your panties to pull them off. “Did I say something about taking these off?”
“Then how are you gonna eat me out properly?”
“Oh, my sweet bunny,” he hovered over you on the couch, the smirk forever present as you wrapped your arms around his neck pulling him closer to you, “I’m gonna make you scream my name in no time once I get a taste of you, and then I’ll fuck into oblivion until you beg me to stop.”
“Is that a promise?”
The doe eyes you sent him not matching the secret wish that question held, making his smirk grow as he pulled you in for another kiss, one of his hands going all the way from your waits to your knee as his other, found your breasts, pinching the hardened nipple making you moan against the kiss before he slapped it before massaging it all over again, making you whimper against his lips.
“It’s a promise since the moment I first saw you,” his lips lingering closely to your own as you felt his hand squeeze your thigh as his other moved up to your neck cupping your face pulling you in for another tender and innocent kiss before he started moving downwards, leaving a trail of open mouth kisses on your jaw and neck before reaching the valley of your breasts. “It’s a promise from the moment I saw your tits almost slipping out of one of those dresses you wore for the first night out we had as a group, where I almost had to fight a few guys who wanted what was mine.”
“I thought I wasn’t yours yet.”
“You were always mine, you just didn’t want to accept it,” his mouth fully involved your breast as his hand massaged the other, feeling the little random bites that would sure make their appearance in the morning, but you couldn’t care less as your fingers found his hair moaning every time he sucked and bit your breast, “so pretty like that and I barely touched you, I wonder how pretty you look all fucked out.”
“Why don’t you start by putting your mouth to use somewhere else?”
“Your wish is my comment, love,” he kisses you one last time before the wet trail of kisses happens all over again, slowly but surely accompanied by small bites here and there as Wooyoung makes sure to hold you down and spread your legs open as he gets closer to your clothed core. “Fuck, you are so wet, I wonder how much you can last.”
Combination of his words, eye contact, fingers gently taking the edges of your panties and the small kiss he leaves on top of your clothed aching clit, makes your hips jolt up, bringing a chuckle to Wooyoung’s mouth as he finally takes your panties of, a this line connecting your panties to your soaking core makes him curse before completely throwing your panties somewhere along with the other clothes. “Fuck, I can’t wait to taste you and make you cum on my mouth.”
Before you could say anything, his hot breath collided with your sensitive clit, a tender and contained kiss being left there as you could sense the chuckle Wooyoung left at your whimpers, reverberated through your body before your fingers found his head pulling him into your soaked cunt. His hands firmly on the back of your thigh spreading them open, your knees up to your chest as his mouth fully involved your clit, the kitty licks making you moan loudly and arch your back, feeling the small laugh he let out reverberate through your body once more.
“Woo, fuck-,” you cried as he lowered his head, his tongue at your entrance as his nose would meet your clit sending shocks of electricity and warmth through your body, “fuck, just like that Woo, fu-fuck, your ton-tongue, I can’t I-”
“Don’t you dare hold back, I wanna hear you, bunny.”
As two fingers entered you and his mouth closed on your clit sucking it, a scream left you. His fingers were quick, curling from time to time inside you making you squirm under him, as his arm could barely hold you still, but he honestly didn’t care, the sight of you shaking under him, your taste on his mouth, the feeling of your cunt clenching his fingers was sending him into overdrive and he wasn’t even inside you yet. 
The first wave hit you like a truck, the guttural sound that left your mouth followed by a scream as your fingers pulled Wooyoung’s hair was enough for him to finally let go of your wet folds. Once you felt his face away from you, your eyes met with his face glistening with your juice as he pushed his two fingers into his mouth, ravishing on your taste before pulling you in for another kiss. Your hands quickly ran down his chest to find his hard cock, before he stopped you.
“But Woo-”
“We’ll have plenty of that, unfortunately, if I don’t get inside of you right now, I’m afraid I’ll combust,” as you pulled him in for another kiss, your heels found his ass and thigh, pulling him into you, your hand finding his hard leaking cock and putting it at your entrance, making him whine against your lips as you squeezed him with your hand as to pull him closer to where both of you needed. “Fuck, I’m gonna break you, bunny.”
“You can break me as many times as you want if you are willing to put me back together.”
“God you are so perfect,” as his lips found yours with a tender and borderline innocent kiss, his cock pushed through your gummy walls making you gasp and moan against his lips before he hid his face on the crook of your neck, biting the base as he slowly entered your tight hole. “Tell me when I can move.”
A small shake of your head was all he needed before he started progressively thrust into you, his hips finding yours at a rapid pace as both your moans and grunts filled the house along with the sounds of your bodies. Wooyoung was a bit over average size, but he was girthy, so you were still getting used to his size as he fucked you, the head of his cock hitting your cervix every so often. 
His hands pulled your legs towards your chest making him hit a whole new spot inside you, making you scream at the feeling before his thumb start rubbing circles on your clit, your legs already shaking, mouth open, uncontrollable moans leaving both of you as his thrusts became sloppier, his kisses were messy and you clenched so much around him that ripped profanity after profanity from his lips. 
“Woo, I’m coming, fuck, please don’t stop, don’t fucking stop, it feels so good!”
“Cum with me, love, cum all over my cock,” as if magic, his words hitting your core sending you to combust under him, shaking and screaming as you felt your orgasm reach you, feeling his warm seeds inside you as his thrusts faltered before coming to a stop. Your legs were numb, but your arms quickly wrapped around him, your nails scratching his scalp softly as his body weight held you against the couch. “You are just as perfect as I imagined you to be.”
Your giggle came with the small kisses and love bites he left on your neck before pulling out of you and placing some distance between you two as he watched his seeds leak from your fluttering hole, a smirk on his lips before his lips met with your clit making you cry a moan.
“Wooyoung, please…!”
“Sorry love,” his face was quick to go up to yours, a kiss on your lips as you both smiled at the current situation. “So, can I ask you to be officially mine, now?”
“I was yours from the moment we met, Wooyoungie.”
“That’s my good little bunny.”
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general masterlist here ♡
network: @cultofdionysusnet ♡ @atzhouse ♡
©skteezcursed (2024) — all rights reserved. reposting/modification of any kind is not tolerated.
DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE, PLAGIARISE OR REPURPOSE.
211 notes · View notes
matchaverse · 2 days
Text
The Walls | CL16
pairing: singer!charlesleclerc x late!partner!gasly!reader
summary: with the loss of his longterm partner, charles dedicates him and his bands music about them
faceclaim: none
warning: mentions of drugs, overdose, death, thoughts of suicide, alcohol.
no part two.
2011
[instagram] yourusername
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liked by charlesleclerc, pierregasly, and 12 others
tagged | @charleclerc @pierregasly @estebanocon
yourusername | these fools are trying to make music!
charlesleclerc: fools??
pierregasly: i’ll tell my mom that y/n is being mean
yourusername: snitch.
“y/n stop being mean to your brother and his friends” your mother, Pascale, yells from the kitchen. you huff and roll eyes as you walk down the hallway from your room to your brothers room.
“you’re such a snitch” you chuckle as you take a seat on the floor next to charles as he tunes his guitar.
your brother, pierre, just rolls his eyes with a chuckle. “maybe don’t be mean to us” he shrugs as he helps esteban with his bass.
“what happen with karting?”
“we still do that but with the way max keeps winning every single race we wanted to try and dabble into something we are passionate about” charles answers looking at you with a smile. you nod in understanding.
“you guys are pretty good a making music, so do you guys think you’ll make it big?” you ask curiously. all three boys look at each other with the same idea in mind.
“yes” they all say with certainty.
2015
[instagram] yourusername
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liked by charlesleclerc, taylorswift, and 126,537 others
tagged | @ChaseAtlantic
yourusername: four years later and my brother and two best friends are playing their songs in clubs!! so proud of you three ❤️
pierregasly: thank you! we wouldn’t have been able without your support ❤️
charleslecler: someone had to be our stage manager
estebanocon: y/n literally whined for days just to get that position
yourusername: no shame, i’d do it again.
estebanocon: 😒
you’re standing backstage of the local club where the boys were playing at with a few other bookies as the three young men walk back to meet you after the show.
“you three did wonderful, truly, the crowd loved you” you say with a huge smile, giving each boy a hug.
“no, thank you for getting us a gig here” esteban chuckles as he sips from his water bottle. charles and pierre nod in agreement.
“how did you get us a gig anyways?” the monégasque man asks while crossing his arms and a small smirk rests on his lips.
you give a small shrug before answering with “used to sleep with the owner”
“what?!” pierre’s voice rings out.
2017
yourusername posted a story
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caption: love the party life
replies:
charlesleclerc: wya??? you walked away
yourusername: just partying
charles lost you, pierre and esteban at this party. he’s been walking around for about twenty minutes now, his messages not sending.
“chug! chug! chug!” charles hears a loud chant of a few people hooting, he makes his way over and see you standing the middle of the circle just downing whatever liquids are in the red solo cups on the table in front of you.
he shakes his head with a sigh, making his way into the circle once you finish the last cup.
“y/n..”charles mumbles as he places a hand on your waist. you turn and look at him with a smile, he can smell the alcohol in you
“hi charlie!” you slur, letting out a giggle.
“how drunk are you?”
you shrug, you stopped counting after the first few drinks. charlie’s lets out a big sigh.
“come on, let’s find the others and head back home”
2020
[instagram] charlesleclerc
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liked y yourusername, madisonbeer, and 648,638 others
tagged | @yourusername
charleslecler | one year with my love ❤️
yourusername: aww baby🥺🥺
username: y/n smokes??
username: and they party all the time
username: i mean their life ig 🤷‍♀️
username: anyone else see the one clip on twitter where y/n did a line of coke?
username: 🚩🚩🚩
username: they are grown??
username: yeah but it’s not cute
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“i don’t understand what the problem is!” your voice raises to match charles’s tone.
“the problem is that you don’t understand how serious drugs and alcohol can be!” the veins on his forehead and neck look like they are about to burst from the sheer amount of anger running through his body. you can only scoff in response.
“i’m young charlie! im only 22 and it’s nothing serious!”
“YES IT IS!” you flinch at his tone. charles seems this and sighs, walking closer to you and taking your hands in his own.
“baby…i’m not saying you can’t have fun but the drugs isn’t needed to have fun..please just stop”
2022
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to say charles was freaking out was an understatement, he was terrified. he didn’t understand what happen with you, you were doing so much better than last year. you weren’t partying as much and he knew you stopped drinking but he didn’t know you were still doing some type of drug.
pulling up to the hospital, charles didn’t care if his parking job was decent, the only thing on his mind was you.
“how’s y/n?” charles breaths out as he makes his way to the waiting room to meet your brother. pierre had tears in his eyes and his cheeks were puffy.
“..they..t-they said it’s not looking good” pierre breaks down, charles moves forward and pulls his best friend into a hug, trying hard to keep his own tears from flowing.
“it’s okay..it’s gonna be okay..”charles whispers, not even believing his own words.
2024
[instagram] charlesleclerc
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liked by pierregasly, estebanocon, and 639,739 others
tagged | @yourusername
charlesleclerc: it’s been two years since we lost you. you were the light of my life and i’m so sorry i couldn’t help you get better. i continue living on for you, i wake up every morning to keep your name alive, you were my best friend, my other half, i love you so much ❤️
if anyone is going through hardships do not hesitate to reach out and contact someone, there are people who will help you out. reach out to me, pierre or esteban because we will help you. everyone deserves to live a happy life. 🙌
i, myself, have struggled with moving forward after losing y/n but with the help of my friends and family i knew i had to keep pushing through this hard patch in my life. i understand the struggles and pain and would never wish this onto anyone
pierregasly: two years already..
estebanocon: the world is cruel.
charlesleclerc: truly don’t understand how the world moved forward after this
username: our hearts go out to you charles!! ❤️
username: you’re so strong!!
username: i reached out to charles during my depressive episode and he is a sweetheart, he did help me out.
username: i love how charles donates to rehabs around the country
username: hes a big advocate for charities that help people who are struggling with drug addiction
username: stop that’s literally so sweet
charlesleclerc: i will spend the rest of my days advocating ❤️
tags: @honethatty12
tell me why this took like three days to write 💀
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hawkinsbnbg · 2 days
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See, Eddie had always been bad at flirting if not a disaster at it. And it didn't help when he had a bad habit of going dumb around Steve Harrington—the boy of his dream, the muse of his soul, the sun of his flowers, and the light of his life.
At this point, it was inevitable that whatever he managed to say to Steve always ended up sounding awkward or worse, ominous.
"Why are you staring?" Steve cocked an eyebrow at him, hazel eyes gleaming in amusement.
They were having a movie night at the Munson’s new apartment after holding one at Steve’s just last week.
And as usual, Eddie’s attention was on the other boy, unable to stop gazing at that lovely face.
Sometimes, Eddie still felt like he was hallucinating whenever he hung out with Steve. Because, never in his wildest dream, he would see himself being friends with King Steve.
And yet, against all odds, after surviving Hell together, they had become fast friends and stayed like that for months. These days, Eddie could confidently say that he was Steve's best friend besides Robin.
Then again, he was quite sure Steve wouldn't give him The Moves™️—lips biting, eyes glancing up through lashes, knees squeezing, hips knocking, hands holding—if they were just friends.
So. Flirting.
If only Eddie was all suave and smooth, he bet they would be boyfriends by now, and not whatever that had been going on between them these last few months.
Sorry for staring but your eyes are so beautiful; they’re the most priceless gemstones in the world, sweet candies that I want to possess, a hazel sky that I want to keep drowning in, was all Eddie wanted to say.
But instead, he blurted out. "I wanna lick your eyeballs.”
Horrified, Eddie slapped a hand over his mouth before quickly correcting his grave mistake.
"Wait– I didn't mean that," he flailed his hands around in panic and tried to explain to a wide-eyed Steve. "I meant, I want to keep your eyes to myself– No, that sounds so creepy, oh my god–"
"Hey, hey, it's okay," Steve straightened from his comfy position on the couch and held Eddie's hands gently. "Calm down, Eds. Just take your time. I promise I won't go anywhere."
Eddie nodded, heart beating fast under the attention of those warm and kind doe-eyes.
Eventually, he got a grip on himself and turned his hands so he could lace them with Steve. Theirs were about the same size but always fitted so well together like gloves.
Eddie looked up to meet Steve's patient gaze. He took in a deep breath and exhaled slowly. The success rate was sixty percent, which was enough for him to work with.
"I uhm, like your eyes a lot,” he cleared his throat slightly. “So can I take you on a date tomorrow?"
In a fleeting second, he feared for a rejection. But then, Steve smiled at him, sweet and pretty, and Eddie was done for.
"My shift lasts until four, so you can pick me up then," Steve gave his hands a light squeeze.
Overwhelmed with joy, Eddie pulled the other boy into his lap to kiss him silly.
Later, they moved into Eddie's bedroom to continue their making out session without worrying about being walked in on by Wayne.
He hunched over Steve with those long legs wrapping around his lower back, and kept peppering Steve's face with kisses because he could never have enough of him.
"Should've," a kiss on the forehead. "Done," a kiss on the eyelid. "This," a kiss on the nose. "Sooner," another kiss on the cheek.
Steve giggled and threaded his fingers into Eddie's hair to pull him down into another tender kiss.
When they parted again, they were both blushing and panting.
Eddie had to refrain himself from grinding against Steve, knowing he wouldn't be able to keep his pants on once he succumbed to the siren's call.
Steve didn't share the same sentiments as him, however, when those legs tightened and forced Eddie to scoot in closer, making their clothed erections press into each other.
Even through multiple layers of denim, Eddie still felt the delicious friction that lit him up like wildfire.
"God, you're killing me, sweetheart," Eddie groaned and pecked those pouty lips, red and swollen like sin.
"Haunt me then," Steve whispered and rolled his hips, tempting and alluring. "Make me remember."
Eddie didn't say anything. He didn't need to. He just surrendered himself to the siren's call and got lost in the sweet paradise that was Steve Harrington.
Afterward, as Eddie was stroking Steve's naked back absently, he pressed a kiss on Steve's forehead.
"Think we should take it slow, baby?"
"If that's what you want, Eds," Steve shrugged slightly. Then, in a small voice, he glanced up from where he was pillowing on Eddie's chest. "You'll tell me if I move too fast, 'kay?"
"The last thing I'm gonna complain about is you, baby boy," Eddie snorted and tucked a stray hair behind Steve's ear. "I just wanna hear your opinions about our relationship is all."
This time, it was Steve's turn to snort. "Haven't been on a date yet, and here we're already talking about our relationship."
"Yeah," Eddie chuckled. "We're kinda doing things out of order right now," he gave Steve's forehead another small kiss. "But you were an impatient little thing, sweetheart. Can't imagine what you would've done to me if I hadn't given in earlier."
"Don't pretend like you haven't been desperate to lay your hands on me," Steve rolled his eyes with a quiet huff.
"Keep doing that and you're gonna see how desperate I am, doll face," Eddie said huskily.
"Is that a threat?" Steve raised his eyebrow in challenge, hazel eyes gleaming impishly. "Because it's not working on me, honey."
Eddie's lips stretched into a wide grin and before Steve could taunt him again, he started tickling the other boy.
In the end, Steve had won the tickle war and Eddie had blown him off as a reward.
To no one’s surprise, they managed to go through another round, and by the time they finished, Steve was too out of it to tease Eddie anymore.
The morning after, he had woken up with Steve in his arms.
Once Steve roused, they had made out a bit too long in the bed, exchanged toes-curling handjobs in the bathroom, and had breakfast together with Wayne before leaving for work.
When the time rolled in, Eddie might be a bit too eager to give Steve everything, because he had gone a little overboard for their date night.
But all in all, Steve had enjoyed the dinner Eddie prepared and given him the most legs-shaking blowjob ever when they were watching TV on the couch.
Later that night, having Steve snore blissfully in his arms, Eddie decided that the date was more than a success.
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scoonsalicious · 21 hours
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1.1 Major
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader
Summary: Lily McIntire, trainer for new SHIELD recruits at the Avengers Tower, has been in love with her best friend, Bucky Barnes, from the moment she met him. She's been content with her role of the #1 girl in Bucky's life, even if it means she has to sabotage a romantic relationship or two. It'll be worth it when he realizes that they're meant for each other, right? There's just one small problem: Lily McIntire never expected Bucky Barnes to fall for You.
Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, alcohol consumption, slight objectification of men.
Word Count: 1.6k
Previously On...: Lily McIntyre met Bucky Barnes. Everything had changed, and now it's only him that matters.
A/N: You know what? Fuck it. Turns out I write more when I'm actively writing for all of you. Plus, I miss you, besties. Yes, I know-- it's only been two days, but I don't care. You guys give me the strength to face the day, and when I'm interacting with you, I'm happiest. So, we're starting the full roll-out of With Friends Like These... Now, there won't be multiple postings per day, so I won't be dropping a bunch at once. We're going to start nice and slow, lol. I hope you like it!
NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates
Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!
You stood outside the door to the bar, nervous as fuck. It wasn’t every day a girl got invited to spend an evening out on the town with the goddamned Avengers, and though you’d only known Natasha Romanoff for about six months now, you were honored she liked you enough to extend an invitation for you to join her and her friends on their off time. 
Giving yourself a once over in the reflection of the bar’s window, you double checked to make sure you looked good– your hair and makeup were on point, your dark wash skinny jeans hugged your curves in the best possible way, and the black satiny top you wore under your leather jacket showed just enough cleavage to be tantalizing, but not trashy. 
You got this, you told yourself. You took a breath, and walked inside. 
The place was dimly lit, but not too crowded. You were able to spot Natasha easily– it wasn’t as if the striking redhead was hard to miss. She sat at a high top with another redhead, nursing a vodka tonic. Catching her eye, you waved and made your way over.
“Major!” Nat greeted you, going in for a friendly hug, which you happily returned. “I’m so glad you made it!” She pointed to the other redhead– Wanda Maximoff, The Scarlet Witch, you remembered now from having seen her on the news– and introduced you. “Major, this is Wanda; Wanda, Major.” You shook hands as the other woman offered you a kind, welcoming smile.
“Finally, some balance to the force,” she joked. At your questioning look, she elaborated: “We are desperately outnumbered in the girl department when it comes to our friend group,” she said. “It’s just me and Nat versus the boys.”
“There’s Lily, too,” Nat interjected.
“Please.” Wanda said, waving Nat’s words off dismissively. “We all know that Lily is not one of us.”
Nat snorted into her drink. “Lily’s just not really a girl’s-girl,” she offered to you in explanation. “Very much sees herself as ‘one of the guys,’ if you catch my meaning.”
You nodded; you’d had plenty of experience with pick-me girls in the past. “Yeah, I know the type.” You waved down a waitress and put in an order for a frozen margarita.
“So, Major,” Wanda said, taking a sip of her beverage once the waitress had gone, “which one of our lucky bachelors is going to catch your eye tonight?”
“I don’t follow,” you said, confused. 
Wanda turned to Nat and playfully hit her on the shoulder. “You bitch! You didn’t tell her?”
Nat had the decency to look sheepish. “I wanted it to be organic,” she said, offering you an apologetic smile.
“Natasha Romanoff,” you said, realization dawning on you, “did you invite me out tonight to try and set me up with one of your teammates?”
Nat frowned, looking remorseful. “I know I should have said something, but you’re always complaining about how you never have luck with dating, and it just so happens I live in a compound literally full of eligible men, so I thought… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have overstepped.”
The waitress brought over your margarita and you raised it, toasting to Nat. “Fuck apologies; you want to hook me up with an Avenger? Girl, remind me to send you a gift basket!”
Nat and Wanda both laughed, raising their own glasses to toast with you. Wanda leaned over toward you, her voice a conspiratorial whisper.
“Alright, don’t be obvious about it,” she said, “but our fine gentlemen are over at the pool table.” You followed her line of sight and were met with an array of some of the most attractive men you had ever seen. Yeah, you’d seen them on tv, and in magazines, but they were always wearing costumes and masks. But up close? And in person?
“Woof,” you said softly. 
“Okay,” said Nat, leaning in on your other side. “Let’s size up our options. First, we’ve got Captain America, himself, Steve Rogers. All-American, corn-fed, take-home-to-mamma kinda guy. Such a gentleman, could bench press four of you. Knows how to treat a girl right.”
“And bore her to tears,” Wanda added.
“Wands!” Nat flashed her eyes. “We’re supposed to be talking them up!”
Wanda shrugged. “Facts are facts,” she said. “A sweetheart, really, but very old fashioned.”
“Fine,” Nat said, exasperated. “Moving on, we have Sam Wilson, our resident Falcon. He’s funny, charming, a great dancer.”
“Seriously good moves,” Wanda added with an enthusiastic nod.
“Smart, good listener,” Nat offered. “Incredibly loyal.”
“You make him sound like a puppy,” you said, laughing.
“Oooh, oooh, my turn!” Wanda said enthusiastically. “Next up is our resident himbo, the one and only Thor Odinson. Unbelievably endearing, the body of a literal god: Great hair, an ass you could bounce a quarter off of, arms that could snap your tiny little body right in half if he had half a mind to…”
“Down, girl,” Nat said, flicking some droplets of water from her water glass at Wanda. “Damn, we’re here for Major, not you.”
“Sorry,” said Wanda, ducking down to hide her blush behind her hair. “He’s just so… big. And… beefy. Like, what does one even do with that much man?” she asked, before muttering so low you could barely hear her: “I would really like to find out.”
You and Nat stifled your laughter. “Okay, definitely not going to be Thor for me, then,” you offered. Across the room, another man caught your eye, one Nat and Wanda hadn’t mentioned yet. “Who’s that?” you asked them.
Nat craned her neck. “Oh, that’s Parker. I dunno; he’s kinda on the young side for my taste, but the kid is 18, so if that’s what you’re into–”
“Ugh, no– pass,” you said, realizing she had been referring to the skinny teenager who was hanging on Steve Rogers’ every word. “No, I mean the brunet. Who’s he?” The more you studied him, the more you realized he just may be the most handsome man you’d ever seen. He was currently leaning against a pool cue, engrossed in conversation with Sam. He had a slight smirk on his face, as if he was keeping in a very humorous secret, and it painted his features in an adorably boyish light. 
While you were looking at him, he turned his head and saw you watching him. You should have been mortified at being caught staring but instead, you were taken aback by how striking his crystal blue eyes were. You offered him a soft smile, and were delighted when his own widened in return, his cheeks taking on a dusky hue in the low light, before Sam elbowed him, bringing his attention back to the game of pool. He shot you another look, running his tongue along his bottom lip, before refocusing his attention.
“Oh,” said Nat, following your gaze. “Oh, no, no, no. That’s Bucky Barnes. He’s… not on the menu.”
You turned back toward her, disappointed. “Oh. Of course, guy that good looking’s got to have a girlfriend, right?”
Nat and Wanda exchanged glances. “Not exactly,” Nat said.
“Remember how we mentioned Lily not being a girl’s-girl?” Wanda asked, nodding her chin toward where the boys were racking the balls for a new game. You hadn’t noticed the woman in their midst before– petite, blond, and athletic. 
“Yeah, Lily’s more of a Bucky’s-girl,” Nat added. “Just, you know, Bucky’s not aware of it.”
You must have looked very confused, because Wanda was quick to clarify. “Bucky only joined the team… what? Four years ago?” She looked to Nat for confirmation, and Nat nodded. “He was like a totally different guy back then. Didn’t go out, didn’t want to be around people.”
“Like Oscar the Grouch, but if you took him out of the trash can and gave him moderately better grooming standards,” Nat offered. 
“Yeah,” Wanda continued, nodding in agreement, “and for the longest time, the only person he would talk to was Steve. But then, like, Lily made it her life’s work to become his best friend.”
“I remember it annoyed the shit out of him in the beginning,” Nat added. “Poor guy just wanted to be left alone to process his trauma.” She sighed. “But the girl was relentless. She’s got tenacity, I’ll say that for her.”
“That’s actually kind of sweet,” you said. “That she wouldn’t give up trying to be there for him.”
“No, sorry,” Nat said. “We’re not explaining this well. She basically made being Bucky’s best friend her entire fucking personality. It was like, any other friend she had just–poof! Stopped existing to her. We no longer mattered; everything became about Bucky.”
“It’s a bit much,” Wanda said. “She’s very… I don’t want to say protective is the right word for it, but very possessive of him.”
“It’s like no girl Bucky’s ever dated has been good enough to pass her standards,” Nat said. “And she’s had no problem making that abundantly clear, and I know she’s been the reason for at least a couple of his relationships ending. Poor guy’s balls must be so blue by now, they’re practically black; she never lets him get any action.”
You took a sip of your margarita. “Well, they’ve got to be sleeping together, right?” you asked. Nat and Wanda both looked at you. “I mean, that would explain it, right?”
“Oh, they are definitely not,” Nat said. “Though I’m sure she wishes. I heard him tell Steve she reminds him of his dead kid sister.”
You sucked in a breath. “Ouch,” you said. “Just what every girl wants to hear, I’m sure.” You looked back over to the pool table, admiring the way Bucky bent over to take a shot. “It’s too bad,” you said, turning back to girls. “I mean, he’s hot as hell, but no man’s worth taking on that kind of drama.”
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lushaletta · 3 days
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love and its lethal consequences / tom riddle
pairing: tom riddle x fem!reader
content: muggleborn!reader, dark!tom, mild swearing, violence
summary: tom grapples between his dark desires and his unlikely affection for you. it’s deadly.
a/n: part 3 to this lil series :> pls lmk if u guys r enjoying so far!! idk how long i want this to be but we shall see where it goes
read the previous parts: one two
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⋆ ࣪.  ⁺⑅ ⋰˚ *.゚ .˳⁺⁎˚ ˚⁎⁺˳ . ༺ ˖࣪ ˖࣪ ∗
Tom has decided. And once Tom decides something, nothing will get in his way.
You are to be his.
The murder would be the easiest part of all. Twice, now, he’s done it. First with that disgusting, grumbling Myrtle and second with his nasty father he can’t even be bothered to think about.
Third time is always the charm. He has it all figured out.
“Tommy!” you beam, following the daily routine. You slide over a treacle tart. “You liked these ones last time.”
He accepts the dessert wordlessly. He’s too deep in thought. You grin.
A few more moments of silence pass and you begin to be irritated by the lack of noise. You have to fill the air up somehow. “Have I told you about Murph yet?”
He’s almost sickened by the name itself. So much so that he can’t stomach the lovely tart your mother has made for him. You’re on a nickname basis now? “You have not.”
You haven’t told him anything about this boy, but he already knows everything. He won’t have to worry about this foul beast for much longer, so he’ll tolerate the giddiness in your eyes for now.
“We’ve just gone on a date. I think it went well, you know? He’s sweet. Opens the door for me, matches pace. That type of thing.”
Tom could do that too if that’s what you really wanted. “How wonderful,” he deadpans.
You’d be a fool not to notice the way his eye twitched when you said the word “date” or the poorly hidden sarcasm he laced in his speech.
“I think our next one is this Wednesday,” you continue.
He’s absolutely fucking repulsed. If he didn’t know any better, he’d march on over to that moron’s room and take care of it himself. But there’s a plan, procedure to be followed. And Tom is nothing if not methodical.
“I can’t believe it! The both of us have dates this week. What even are our lives now?” Camilla cheers, leaning back in her seat.
“I don’t think Tom is very happy about mine.”
She raises a brow. “That’s because Murphy isn’t pure. I’m telling you, Riddle’s lot is psychotic.”
“Okay, I’m not a fan of them either, but Tom knows I’m not pure. He’s been perfectly pleasant.”
“He hardly speaks!” she retorts.
You roll your eyes and urge her to continue reading her book. She complies. Camilla’s never been very argumentative.
As she settles in the pages, all entranced by the words, you lean back in your chair. It is a strange twist of fate that you’re now friends with Tom, but despite Camilla’s warnings, you can’t get yourself to leave. It’s a comfortable trap.
“Hello,” Tom says from behind you as you swing your feet on the railings.
You don’t skip a beat. “Hi!”
Tom knows by now that he can’t surprise you.
The echoing chambers of Hogwarts are bathed in soft moonlight, and no one else is around. Tom is usually by himself at this time. You only steal each other’s afternoons.
“You know,” you muse, breaking the comfortable quiet that settled between you. “You’re very important to me.”
Tom clears his throat. He’s never really been important to anyone. He swallows. “Likewise.”
He’s avoiding your gaze. You think it’s cute. His lips quirk into a faint smile, a rare glint of amusement dancing in his dark eyes, but it’s gone as soon as it comes.
Suddenly, you study his face, trying to unravel the mysteries hidden within. He’s more withdrawn recently. Even quieter, if that’s possible. You suppose it has something to do with Murph but you never can be too sure when it comes to him.
“You’re staring,” he says.
“I like the view.” He sighs.
Tom is not a good person. Far from it. Your friend realises it but you don’t. You’re a glimmer of hope in the darkness that threatens to consume him, that’s already consumed him. You’re both refuge from his despair and a constant reminder. He finds solace in your company and he hates it but now he has no choice. He can’t bring himself to kill you. He knows he never will and so it has to be this way.
It will hurt you, undoubtedly. It will make him more terrible than he already is.
Time is creeping up on him. You’re growing closer with that wretched Ravenclaw and the longer he waits, the more you will be affected.
“Murphy Atthill.”
He turns around at the call of his name and can’t help but feel uneasy. Tom’s presence tends to do that. “Riddle? What can I do for you?” he asks politely. He isn’t very good at masking his anxiety.
Tom casts the Killing Curse and he feels the unmistakable split of his soul as he recites haunting Latin incantations. He knows there’s no going back.
A chilling sense of finality looms over him and yet it weighs light on his conscience. All for the better, this is. In fact, it’s a twisted sense of satisfaction that he feels knowing that the deed is done. He knows he’s crossed a line with you from which there is no return,
But Murphy’s eyes lifeless are much prettier that way.
taglist for this series!! @mariamyousef702 @enidths @narwhal-swimmingintheocean @girlogies @unwrittenletter @helalokithor
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youandiwerealive · 17 hours
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Só quero ir para casa, para ti [rd]
Author’s note: my best friend described this as “disgustingly cute”, so here you have some cute dad!Rúben to compensate for the last one 🫣 thank you to the anon who requested this, hope you enjoy it! Mwah mwah
wc: 1601- English is not my first language! Feedback is always appreciated
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Rúben absolutely hates being far from you, especially now that you’re pregnant with your second baby.
He is currently in Abu Dhabi with the team, preparing the upcoming season. Not only is he 4 hours ahead in the clock, he is also full of trainings and recovery sessions - leaving him so little time to talk to you.
You are now five months pregnant and your baby is starting to kick and move like crazy inside of you. You try your best to show everything to Rúben, not wanting him to feel left out for losing all these special moments. But, you both agree that video calls might help a bit to ease the sadness of being away from each other, but those minutes don’t really make up from all the time that Rúben spends without his wife, daughter and son.
Every time he looks at you through his phone screen, he can’t help but think how beautiful you look, the pregnancy glow really showing again - more and more each day now. He misses you like crazy, even just a couple of hours would already be too much time away from you and your family, but spending weeks so far is killing him already.
He especially misses sleeping next to your belly, wanting to feel as close to his boy as possible, while Matilde is wrapped strongly in his arms. He misses the way you would laugh when he peppered your belly with kisses. He misses talking to his children - having full conversations about every thing and anything at the same time, really. Always promising his entire love and dedication to the other love of his life, his baby - Dinis.
Rúben has been sad lately, thinking non-stop about all the times you call him, or send him videos of his son moving inside your belly. He hasn’t felt it yet. Every single time the baby decides to move, he’s not around, and when he is, Dinis decides to keep quiet.
“Maybe he is just shy. He’ll move for you when he feels like it, we can’t rush these things” - you would always say to him, trying to get a bit of all the guilt Rúben held upon his shoulders to go away. Why wouldn’t the light of his life kick for him? He even smiled at the first time you told him in between laughs ‘he’s not kicking because he’s afraid that you’ll tackle him’. Yeah, jokes about him being a footballer and his son not kicking around him.
But lately he has been feeling down, his mind thinking about that all the time. What if his baby gets here and doesn’t feel comfortable enough around him? He would always move to the sound of her mom’s voice, but not to his. Matilde was a very active baby, always moving and kicking to the sound of her dad’s voice - totally a daddy’s girl, still today being always glued to him, playing him with, sleeping with him, cuddling with him.
Either way, Rúben is tired, missing you, his princess and his baby. You are video chatting once again, him seeing how his boy’s tiny feet would mark your belly and talking to his princess, Matilde. He tries to smile, glad to see his baby moving once again, even if he’s not there to feel the sensation.
You can sense that he is a little down, but you try to shrug it off since he said he was feeling tired and sleepy.
“Tenho tantas saudades vossas” (I miss you so much) - he says lowly, like his voice is threatening to start shaking if he speaks any louder.
You smile, understanding why he is so down. “We miss you too” - you say to your husband, noticing how his face falls.
However, the voice of his angel on earth brings a smile to appear on Rúben’s face. “Volta rápido, papá” (come back soon, daddy) - Matilde says, showing his daddy her newest growing teeth, that has been giving her mommy so much trouble and sleepless nights.
“Eu já só quero ir para casa, para vocês” (I just want to go home, to you) - by the way he is talking portuguese to you, you know he really means it. He takes the value of saudade very seriously, no translation can do that feeling justice.
Rúben goes to sleep with a headache. Maybe he should stop pushing his baby, stop begging him to kick into his hand. Maybe he should go back home with a different mindset. Trying to fight some kind of war with his son really sounds crazy to him, and he kind of hates himself for being so annoyed about something so trivial as that.
When he finally goes home, after so many weeks apart, you and Matilde are waiting home to greet him, you even cooked your daughter’s favourite cake - she insisted so she could share it with her daddy on their usual tea party, something that has became a tradition between Rúben and her already.
Berny the bunny and Johnny the bear are patiently waiting on the three year old girl’s lap for her most important guest to arrive - the little girl anxiously setting every thing up.
When you hear the door handle click open, Matilde immediately runs to the door.
“Papá, papá! You’re home!” - she girl screams as Rúben immediately picks her up and wraps her on his arms, taking in the wonderful and unmistakable scent of his daughter, breathing deeply and hugging her tightly, scared that she would run away if he puts her down - but she would never run away, she loves her daddy more than anything in this world, his embrace is her favourite place to be. The little girl wraps her tiny arms around her daddy’s neck even tighter, telling him how much she loves him and how much she missed him every day that he was away.
That alone made some tears appear in Rúben’s eyes, walking with his princess still in his arms, going to greet you with a passionate kiss, missing you like death. His hand instinctively goes to your belly - nothing happened. But Rúben is not going to worry about that anymore. He has his family by his side again, and that’s all that matters to him.
After the tea party with Matilde and a small family dinner, the little girl was already fast asleep on her father’s chest - never letting go of him since he arrived, and Rúben silently thanked her for that, really in need to feel his light near him as well, begging her to illuminate him a little more. Which she does, all the time, even if she doesn’t realise it. Rúben is already feeling lighter, being home near you and his babies helping him a lot with his mood.
After putting your sleepy daughter in her room, you and Rúben finally have some time to yourselves. He immediately wraps you in his arms, cuddling you close to him, hugging you and kissing your neck, face, shoulder, anywhere he could reach.
“Amo-te tanto” (I love you so much) - Rúben softly speaks in your ear, making your heart tingle like it’s the first time he is saying those words to you.
“We love you too” - you smile as you grab his hands that were already touching your belly, massaging your baby boy now.
Rúben smiles and tries his best to not think about the kicking topic.
“Is my boy behaving? Hope you’re not giving mommy much trouble already” - he speaks softly to his son, with a smile on his face.
When those words leave his mouth, Rúben’s hand feels a light kick. His face shows a shocked expression, not really believing what’s happening.
“What was this? This wasn’t a kick, right?” - he asks you, his mouth still agape at the feeling. You laugh at his reaction.
“Yes, it’s a kick, babe. Our son is answering your question” - you kiss the shock out of his face.
“Are you, filho? Are you answering daddy?” - Rúben keeps talking to the baby, hoping that he would keep kicking, amazed at the feeling of his baby’s kick for the first time.
Dinis kicks two more times, harder now at the sound of his dad’s voice, and Rúben’s eyes are full of tears, all the emotion and happiness falling down his face already.
“I can’t believe he’s finally kicking to me” - he says, more to himself.
“He loves you so much, never doubt that” - you reassure him.
“Oh god, I love you so much, Dinis. Dad will always be by your side, to play football with you, to teach you everything about space and astronauts, to take care of you and lead you the way” - he confesses while hugging you tightly now.
Rúben knows how badly you wanted this to happen, just as much as him. And he’s not a religious man, but it’s like he could feel all your prayers on him now, feeling such a powerful love wrapping your hearts, feeling extremely grateful for you, for being such a supportive wife and for bringing to life his biggest dream, the biggest loves of his life, his babies.
When you’re together, everything feels better to him, he’s only happy when he is holding his wife and daughter strongly in his arm - and now you are preparing your family for another beautiful adventure, almost welcoming your baby boy into this world - soon to be Rúben and Matilde’s best friend.
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meichenxi · 2 days
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languages, travel, identity, grief
Maybe some of you have heard of Xu Zhimo's Second Farewell to Cambridge (徐志摩 再別康橋 Translation: Saying Goodbye to Cambridge Again, by Xu Zhimo | East Asia Student). It's an achingly lovely poem about a Chinese scholar who studied in the UK, and how he left so gently, taking nothing with him as he went. It brought me solace over the last year.
I thought for a very long time about how I felt about having to leave China, and what it felt like to mourn for a future that was never going to mine. I cried. How am I supposed to explain why? I'm not Chinese. I've got no family there, or a childhood to look back on. I couldn't explain it even to myself.
That pain was coupled with a type of uncertainty, a discomfort at myself for feeling so strongly. This feeling was not allowed. It meant - what? Something awful, probably. I was a racist, probably. I should hate myself, probably. Fetishization is the word that gets thrown around for white people and their time spent in East Asia at one end of the spectrum - at the other end it's just seen as embarrassing and deeply, you know, cringe. It's a self-interrogation - why do I feel so sad? Why do I feel this pull so strongly anyway, to a country that's not even mine? Why should it matter so much when I leave? I didn't feel like this grief has any sort of legitimacy. But it has taken from September - eight months after leaving - for me to pick up Chinese again.
I felt, for months, hollow and unsettled and drifting from place to place. I opened my textbook, and closed it again. The memories there were too painful. I'm not going to write about why I had to leave, but it wasn't by choice. I had loved the people in the school, even if it was for a short time. When you have no internet and are training eight hours a day, the days are coloured more sharply: bright and hurtful and wonderful all at once. We had no running water. It was in an abandoned hotel. I miss the monk at the temple door opposite the school, always on time at 6am to open it for our classes. I miss the folk at the local shop who invited me to watch films on their projector; once they killed a chicken for us. I miss the woman in the woods who gave me the chestnuts she had picked. I gave the chestnuts to the cook, and we steamed them and ate them by the lake. He wanted me to marry his son; he wanted it so strongly that he brought me pork, and desserts, and gave me paper, and promised me I could have a jade bracelet, that he would buy me a house. I miss the oldest martial arts teacher, who spoke in such strong dialect I could barely understand him. When I was sad and missing home one night, he told me that I should stay after dinner. In the silence and against the cicadas, he started to play the erhu for me. Later, my friend told me that he hadn't know what to say, how to comfort me; I was a foreigner and a young woman, after all. We had very little in common. But nobody has ever played a piece of music for me like that before.
And I miss X, my best friend there and partner in snack-smuggling crime. She is 19 years old, and a janitor's daughter, and one of the wisest people I have ever met. (She also rides an excellent motorbike, and lent me her hanfu, and we sped through the city giddy with our own daring and trying not to be caught.) We got matching haircuts; she had always wanted to cut her hair like a boy, and was too scared to do it alone. When I left, I told her to stay in touch: she shook her head. She said that some people were meant to know each other for some time, and no more. I think the death of friendship by attrition, by - as Elrond said! - the slow decay of time, is one of the saddest things of all. I deleted Wechat. I don't want to read over the old messages. By having this place - her, and the chestnuts, and the cicadas - as a memory, I can tuck it away it. I can keep it close.
I wrote a poem myself on the plane. That was the last I thought about China, the last thought I let myself have, in eight months. I kept myself away from it. It felt like a wound. And against that hollowness, there was constantly the question: Why should I have any right to miss this place? Who I am there? Why does it matter? We are all different people, wherever we go, and whoever we are with; we wear different skins, large or small. In China I was [...]. She was who I was. That name, that I introduced myself to people with - she was bright and friendly and tried to translate things just so. Everybody who goes as the only foreigner to a place - or the only foreigner that speaks the language - is a little bit self-obsessed. It happens. It's unfortunate, and something to guard against. But it also gives you its own kind of identity in a way: your identity is Foreigner. Your identity is a cultural bridge. Everyone you meet, in a country as friendly and curious as China, has questions about you. You stand with your feet in both worlds, and are not really part of either of them. That identity is easy to slip into, like cool water, like trying on new clothes. It's easier that thinking: who am I outside of that? Where am I going? I don't really know. I don't think anyone really does.
And then the second thing happens. I speak Chinese well, by this point. My accent is there, but it's slight. I am short, and have dark hair, and a generally similar build to many East Asians - so the questions I have got in the last few years have changed. Sometimes people think I have been raised here. Sometimes they think I am ethnically Russian, and nationally Chinese. Sometimes I get asked if I am half Chinese. Usually they know I am a Foreigner, 100% white - but not always. There is a peculiar rush that comes from that acceptance; from feeling the relief, just for fifteen minutes, that you belong. It's not about 'passing', or race-bending, or anything twisted - it's nothing so unnerving as that. It's just the human need to belong. Everyone gets tired of being stared at, after a while. And after a while, you start to think - I wish I understood. I wish they understood. I wish this were easy.
But then the conversation keeps going. You don't know a local word, or you misunderstand. You say something in a strange way, or you make a strange gesture, and the glass shatters, and - there you are again, naked again, exhausted again, explaining yourself again. That's the other half of it. There's solace in the Foreigner identity, because that means that's all you are. You don't have to think about your parents, or whether they worry about you so far from home; of course they do. The Foreigner is good and filial and a wonderful daughter. You can craft her into any shape you like. But it also marks you out again and again, endlessly and again, as Other.
There was a paper published a while ago that showed measures of acceptance of non-natives in native-speaking communities. It highlights a strange, but familiar experience to those who have lived abroad - the people who spoke the language to a medium level felt more accepted and less lonely than those that spoke the language to a high degree. It makes sense, and mirrors what I have found with both Chinese and German. When you speak a little Chinese, you are a wonder - a curiousity! Look at the Western girl go! People are kind, and curious, and will slow down to include you in conversations. You are thrilled with what you can access - all this knowledge, that other people don't have! Look how special you are!
And then you get better. And then you realise, cut by cut, that you will never be one of them. You don't want to be Chinese, per se; but you do want to be accepted. You are happy to be British; but you miss China like a wound, an old one, festering, even when it was never yours. How do you tell your family that you are not grieving a lost romance, a beautiful girl, but a language and a life? That there are words of majesty, of playfulness, that will never be yours? You speak well enough that people no longer bother to dumb things down, or explain them; you sit with your discomfort, smile painted on, because - you know. It's not bad. You understand most of it. And on the edge of that circle, smiling uncertainly, following the vast majority of what is being said, you are not clever enough and not witty enough to keep up with the chengyu, the cultural references, the slang, and the raucous laughter around you erupts, and you don't know what you've missed, and everybody says - she's quiet, that one. Maybe all the foreigners are? And all you are doing is sitting and feeling the distance between You and Them as heavy and as stifled in your chest as an ocean of dark.
So you go back. Back to your people. But when you sit with the other foreigners, you are apart. They laugh; what are these nutters doing? The Chinese don't make any sense. The Chinese do this - they do that. You sit there, and then there is a pressure building in your chest too, a discomfort, the desire to stand up and say - well, actually.
You are responsible for everything the Chinese teachers do, and have to explain things in a way that the students understand - Confucian thought, and Buddhist philosophy, translated in pithy bite-size adages for the West. You have no qualifications for this; everything you assert, you feel unsure. Uncertain. Someone else could explain it better, more nuanced, and you need to do more reading anyway - but here you are, and here they are, and you're the only one. And you do know. Not enough, but enough that their jokes, their pains, make you uncomfortable. You feel the need to defend both parties; to be a diplomat, every second of every day. In turn, when the students come to the teachers with problems, you have to translate their grievances in a way that the Chinese teachers will be sympathetic towards. Once I got asked: why do you never join us after class? Why are you always so quiet when you're not working? As a translator, you are always working. Every time you speak, you are working; what you choose to say, and what you choose to not say, and where you choose to intervene. You are building relationships, and disappearing, and you are becoming invisible, and you're a nothing, and you're everyone and you're nobody and nobody realises you are doing anything more than translating at all.
I wanted to stay. I couldn't have stayed. I wanted to be accepted as one of them. I wanted to be accepted for who I was. That means a foreigner. I wanted to be true to myself, which means that I would always be the Foreigner, which means I would always be apart from them. It is that contrast and juxtaposition which causes the grief. And there was never an ending to it, a resolution, a chance to reconcile myself (in China) with myself (in the UK), because all at once I had to leave. The grief comes most from the second arrow - not the pain of leaving, but the bewilderment of not knowing why I was in pain at all.
It's been eight months. Slowly, as spring comes, I feel like I am on surer ground. I can look at my old books, those painstaking notes, and I could look at new ones too and I'm starting to think, because this is what I tell my students, and maybe there's some truth in it - it's okay if you're not perfect. It's okay if you didn't achieve what you wanted to, and that the language - in its wholeness, and who can ever know that? - will never, not quite, be yours. It's the struggle and the process that means that I will know and understand Chinese in a different way, in my own way, in a slanted-to-reality sort of way, that is a treasure in and of itself. There is beauty in its brokenness too.
And there is sorrow, too. The sorrow that comes with easing yourself into a different life, and it holding you gently for a while. I sat there - I spoke to them. It's not only missing a place; it's missing a person you were, a stage of your life, for a time. It's knowing that a place has reached inside your ribs and taken root there - even if you don't return, you can never fully get rid of that again. You are two people now, with feet straddling two oceans. There are parts of you that loved and suffered and hated and grew in Chinese, not English. You can't explain that. You can't even begin. Sometimes - not often - you are a stranger in your own land. The poets spoke of that. In the age of fast travel, of the weekend break, we have forgotten the ways a place can burrow itself inside you, and find its own home.
It's not the same as the grief that someone Chinese will face. But it's still grief. I have put my life into Chinese. Maybe that is all it takes to grow love.
Now, I turn back to Chinese - as a foreigner, as Melissa, as myself. It's a bittersweet thing. I know that I cannot hold all of it. It will spill out, like the sun, and there is no way I can be that without losing myself and my history and my own green woods. But I think I am ready now. I am surer, and a little steadier on my feet.
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atruththatyoudeny · 2 days
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Happy 28th! Here are all the lovely fics I read this month:
where we landed | blueskiesrry | [70k] The leaves were green the last time Harry stepped foot in Holmes Chapel, a stark contrast to the candy apple, butterscotch painting them now, years later. Harry first notices them on the train, gazing out the window with a downturned mouth. A warm something floods his stomach–memories, Harry imagines, of him as a boy, longing for the days when he’d live elsewhere and have to take this very train home for the holidays. He wonders how it’s possible to have once felt eager and euphoric at the sight of changing leaves yet now to feel nothing but tired. He sighs softly, turning away from the trees to look at his daughter, half-curled in his lap, asleep. or: harry returns to his hometown with his sick daughter and more reminders than he bargained for of the boy he once loved when he left a handful of years ago
MARRIED FOR A WEEK?! | gravitycentered | [20k] Hi guys :) You might recognize Harry from one or two of my old videos .. I was tagged in the Married for a week challenge so I asked him to be my husband ! We had to live together for a week and take each other out on a couple romantic dates and that, check out the video to see how it went :) Give it a like if you enjoyed and maybe subscribe if you haven't already. Love you all - Louis x
It's everything else that matters | words_of_my_own | [83k] At forty, Harry has settled down in London, as a single dad and successful businessman. Along comes Louis, his son’s new friend, who turns out to be more than he appears at first sight. Their paths are slowly intertwined as life stories are unfolded and feelings arise. *** "They may only be joking around here… …or the atmosphere has just turned slightly flirtatious. Louis' raised eyebrow and quirky smile adding on to it. It’s fun and exciting, and Harry doesn’t think twice before he throws another glance over his shoulder, just to find Louis steady eyes on him, his teeth digging into his lower lip. Christ, the bloke really is handsome. Sexy, even. And this is definitely not how Harry normally reacts to people of the same sex, but…apparently, he is now."
He Was a Different League (When I Was Nothing Much) | AFangirlFantasy | [21k] Sick of being alone, Marcel is forced (by Niall) to join an online dating app. The idea is well and all, except for the inconvenient fact that he hasn’t moved on from his childhood sweetheart - Louis. If only Marcel could learn to let go, he might actually be able to love again. Or, an AU where finding that 'someone new' actually leads to finding that 'someone old,' and Marcel is painfully oblivious.
I want to wake up where your love is | marcythesassykitten | [166k] “Kinda feels like it is, though. And it’s okay to be pissed at me because of that,” Louis' voice was still the normal feathery sweetness Harry was used to, but it had a harshness to it that he couldn’t place until he looked up and met Louis’ eyes. There was so much pain exposed for Harry to see, for him to be able to pick at, taunt or ignore. Louis was sitting right there, allowing Harry to see all the broken pieces, the sharp edges that had never been mended back together with the love and kindness they needed. In that moment, Harry saw his own pain reflected back at him in Louis’ eyes. He could feel bits of his own heart calling out for him to reach out and allow the two battered hearts to heal together as one. “It’s not. I’m not… I’m really not,” or, a chicago-inspired story about lost dreams, unjust fates, undying love and lots of pizza, repressed feelings, cute kids and, of course, cats
Welcome Home | Jelon | [49k] Louis Tomlinson had to put a stop to his football career for a couple of months and he decided to go back home to rest his mind for a little bit only to find out a really weird coffee shop owner started to visit his mother on a regular basis with just as peculiar but lovely kid named Maxine.
Half a World Away | SilverStuff50 | [10k] Bothy: A bothy is a basic shelter, usually left unlocked and available for anyone to use free of charge. It was also a term for basic accommodation, usually for gardeners or other workers on an estate. Bothies are found in remote mountainous areas of Scotland, Northern England, Ulster and Wales. They are particularly common in the Scottish Highlands, but related buildings can be found around the world (for example, in the Nordic countries, there are wilderness huts).
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Headcanons/Thoughts for Every Main Five Just Dance ship
Obviously I have my favorite but sometimes it’s fun to just think about other ships so I wanted to make a post about ALL of them. For some reason. PS don’t reblog/reply to this with “well actually that one ship sucks and I don’t like it”. As far as we know all of them are the same age and not related so there’s really no reason why any ship is wrong, let people like what they like.
Wanderlust x Jack: I don’t need to rant about them, you all already know. Go read my fanfiction
Wanderlust x Sara: He brings her into this magical world, she loves it and she loves him. It’s a bit cliche but cliches are cliches because they WORK. Also, we know Sara loves the Danceverses, but what if Wanderlust loves Earth? What if he’s got a Little Mermaid thing going on? Imagine Sara showing him around Earth and him being excited by the silliest little things
Wanderlust x Brezziana: They’re both the most energetic ones of the group. Imagine them teaming up on adventures and charging ahead together when the others get tired. Neither of them can always find a friend to keep up with them, but they always have each other
Wanderlust x Mihaly: They’re kind of like two different sides of the Flow? Wander is more energetic and Mihaly’s more chill, so I think they’d balance each other out well. Mihaly gets Wander to slow down every once in a while and appreciate things he’d otherwise miss. Wanderlust shows them how to be more spontaneous and free
Jack x Sara: Sara falls for the bad boy except he’s not actually bad. So much in the Danceverses is bright and crazy and overwhelming, so Jack being more down-to-earth is refreshing for her. Jack loves the way she treats him. Aside from the events of story mode, she doesn’t have the background on Night Swan and Eternyx that the others do, so she doesn’t know his reputation as well. He feels like she really sees him as his own person while everyone else will always remember his mother’s shadow
Jack x Mihaly: I think both of them being the more practical ones of the group could mesh well. We also know Mihaly used to idolize Night Swan in some way, so they both can relate to having wanted to live up to her legacy and now realizing she was wrong. Jack is also always expecting some sort of punishment or consequence if he does something wrong, but Mihaly is so chill about everything that they make him feel like everything’s okay
Jack x Brezziana: Brezziana will drag Jack out of the house to go do stuff when he’s stuck moping around. Theyre SO opposites attract. She’s also ready to stand up for him whenever necessary. Jack will just turn the other cheek to insults and pretend nothing bothers him, but Brezziana won’t let him bottle things up
Sara x Mihaly: Another case of chill vs energetic balancing each other out. I think Mihaly brings Sara to meet Master Panda and he really likes her. What if they try training together to see if Sara is gifted with the Flow like people from the Danceverses are? Again, I feel like Mihaly is also a grounding presence for her amongst the chaos of the Danceverses.
Sara x Brezziana: They go on mall dates a lot! Cute dates where they pick out outfits for each other and try them on. They’re very giggly. They post very cutesy Instagram posts about each other all the time. Connected at the hip when the gang goes out places.
Mihaly x Brezziana: This one’s popular. Again it’s energetic vs chill. Mihaly will often open their home to fourteen texts from Brezziana about something crazy she just did and Mihaly just shakes their head and smiles.
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thatmoththoth · 1 day
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*holds out hands like a poor little Victorian boy*
fr3d1 headcanons?
This is going to be very long so here’s a cut
Ok so. In my mind, he’s a sentient little goober. He said screw the ‘robots can’t feel love’ trope, and proceeded to fall in love with everyone in the OIAR. Anyway he has absolutely no idea what he’s doing at any given time but he knows the following: fear tastes good, I love everyone here, and mischief is fun. As such, he enjoys freaking people out a bit, and causing a bit of mayhem here and there. He’ll give people talkers at very inconvenient times, trip people with his wires, and generally be a nuisance. All in good fun of course. Since he loves the people at the OIAR, if they were to ask him sincerely to stop doing something, he would infact listen, however, no one has don’t that yet.
When no one is in the office he plays computer games on himself, like solitare, snake, minesweeper, ect. Cool Math Games is his best friend when it comes to satisfying his boredom in day hours. Other things he does other than computer games, is doing things he knows will annoy Colin, like rearranging wires in the server room.
One time he tried to download a virus on himself to see what would happen and decided that it was not in-fact a fun thing. Since colin was the one who fixed it, Freddy took that like someone taking care of you when you when you’re sick in bed. Because of this, Freddy is most keen to try to flirt with Colin. Attempts at doing so thus far have not been successful.
On the other hand there’s Alice, who regularly flirts with Freddy in a haha joking way (or atleast that’s what she’s telling herself for now) and even though she isn’t doing it seriously, it’s still highly effective on Freddy. And not just that, but whenever shes the only one working, and she’s slacking off, she’ll infodump her interests towards Freddy. So those are the reasons he loves her so far.
Sam has this odd thing he started doing out of habit about a week after working at the OIAR. Atleast once a week he’ll find some sort of trinket, and leave it on top of his desk monitor. The trinkets range from pennies from off the ground to cool rocks he found. Every time he does this, the next day it’s gone. Sam thinks it’s one of the other OIAR employees taking them, but little does he know that it’s Fr3-d1 and FR3-d1 cherishes each and every one of these little offerings, storing them in a drawer somewhere in the server room.
Nothing for Celia yet. Haven’t really thought about it much, and she hasn’t been here long enough to have much association with Freddy other than knowing the origin of the voices.
Lena and Freddy have a long history. They actively talk to eachother, and have a sort of situationship going on. Maybe they try to like, jumpscare eachother or something. Lena was his first kiss but it was literally the most awkward thing ever so they have never brought it up again, only vaguely alluding to it as ‘The Incident’.
Like Celia I haven’t really thought about Gwen much in terms of Freddy, but I imagine Freddy likes to scare her the most out of everyone. My basis for this is him giving her a bonzo casement right after a traumatic experience with bonzo.
Anyway now for the logistics of my Freddy design.
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So, Freddy can move wires and stuff around because they are a part of him, so he takes advantage of this fact to form a vaguely humanoid shape. A lot of the non wire pieces were either gifts from Lena, Sam, Klaus, or are just random pieces he found lying around that no one was using. He only really does this around Lena as he wants to try to actually make contact with the others without it first.
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kamig4mes · 2 days
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We need friendship headcannons with kisski and hanma it can be seperated or as an trio,you can make one platonic and one as an love interest i dont really care!!!
I'm still excited that you made this request, anon bc this duo has been making eyes at me these days. I thought about kisakixhanmaxfem!reader. I'm so sorry for the wait!! I hope u like it, nd enjoy it!
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#pov: friendship headcanons with Kisaki and Hanma (platonic/love interest)
★ warnings: fem!reader, realistic hc, fluff, funny, friendship, love interest, established relationship, platonic facts, school mention
→ a/n: H&K = Hanma and Kisaki
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—friendship (+ platonic facts)!
The three go and return together wherever they go, both boys coming to pick you up at the entrance of your house and leaving you at the same even when classes are over! This pair makes sure you're in one piece by the end of the day.
The races to determine the unnecessary speed between you are never lacking. A few meters to enter the school, Hanma challenges them to a race to see who gets there first and you accept, and as always you do the countdown.
"Alright! in your marks, read-.. HUH?!
And before you know it Hanma took the dirty lead by shooting out first, taking the lead and leaving you biting the dust
"STOP, STUPID CHEATER!"
You run in search of him screaming complaints between laughs trying to reach him while Kisaki just keeps walking at his pace like the normal person he is, catching up with them minutes later.
At least three times a month they attend karaoke together. They try to use all the power of friendship possible to convince Kisaki to go together, trying not to upset him with his nonsense the previous days. After two attempts, the blonde accepts, renting the most minimal time rate they have to stop listening to the stormy concerts that you and Hanma give it.
It's natural for Hanma to bother you every day, almost as if that's his mission in this life. Sometimes it makes you very angry, is Kisaki who intervenes asking to stop. But once both stoics made you cry out of pure rage so you stopped talking to them for a whole week. They both spent that time following you around in silence and apologizing by buying your favorite sweets.
Hanma accompanies you to almost any nonsense you can think of, until it puts the three of them in a bad position. The bicolor loves the adrenaline rush, but if he feels that his asses can end up in difficult problems to handle he absolutely aborts the mission.
H&K are your protectors. Whether with intimidating looks/postures or verbal threats, both guys make it clear to everyone that you are their best friend and they can't try any moves on you. Yes, that's the way they are.
That's why Valentine's Days were really sad for you because, for some alien reason, you didn't receive any gifts or letters that day. Much less declarations of love or anonymous confessions. NOTHING. And the reason is that in reality, H&K were furtively responsible for eliminating (not literally) anyone who tried to make any move on you regarding the date, the two allying themselves to scare away and intimidate.
"I'm sorry, brat" explains the bicolor blocking the way to the classroom to the boy one grade below you "this girl is already busy"
"B-but I-"
"And don't try anything behind our backs, or you won't want to regret it later," Kisaki muttered, making the poor trembling boy pass out loud saliva when he clattered his knuckles noisily.
This is how your two best friends were always there to comfort you and fill that void of the day with walks or gifts only from them.
The three of them would run away from classes, but only when they are extremely bored of listening to the teacher.
H&K care a lot about your health, even if it doesn't seem like it. They offer you water or some nutritious drink, buy you breakfast and even make sure that you don't consume a lot of fried foods or sweets.
Their jobs are close to each other, so it's easy for the three of them to meet at a specific place and then stop by for a drink or just walk home.
—(+) platonic facts!
The first time H&K saw you wearing a swimsuit for a beach meet-up that you organized with your friends, they gasped. Kisaki felt that her face would explode because of how good your body looked while Hanma quickly glanced at you every time you passed by him.
H&K are the kind of guy in love who contemplates you at every opportunity he can. Kisaki by his observant and discreet nature manages to spy without being seen by anyone while Hanma does it blatantly without caring if it's very obvious or not. You actually caught him once seeing you, and his reaction was to let out a little giggle and look away when he realized that you caught him. You could notice the soft blush on his cheeks.
They enjoy taking pictures of you doing random things. Especially Hanma (he has a whole album of you and kisaki on his phone), and only occasionally Kisaki warns for a good take.
"Take out your phone, Shuji"
"Huh? And for what the hell-?"
"Look over there, is y/n"
Kisaki points at you covertly, and the two-tone nods, catching his friend's intention as he quickly pulled out his phone. Seconds later the flash does its job. They both smile seeing you captured on the screen.
"Good angle" celebrates the blonde "very cute.."
"Yea' she looks fcking beautiful"
Yes, whether it's taking you or going to pick you up, taking a walk to the park for a while and things like that, at first H&K keep track of which one of the two has to share time with you. That's why it's not uncommon for you to feel that they take turns.
Kisaki would leave you a lot of small gifts throughout the week anonymously because he is embarrassed to deliver them to you in person. At first you thought it could be a stalker with ninja skills because you couldn't catch him in the act, but soon (and in the dumbest way) you found out it was the blond one (I have a little pov for this hc, I'll upload it after this!)
—love interest!
Hanma calls you "baby" most of the time, and would use adorable nicknames like "babydoll" or "fcking princess" just to annoy you. I'm not sure with Kisaki, I think "honey" might work for him. But both of them, without a doubt, call you "darling" a lot of the time.
Hanma, unlike Kisaki, is more concerned about your feminine needs. I feel like he has a sharper sense for that kind of thing. On the other hand, you can safely entrust the financial part to Kisaki because that man will cover all your whims.
Maximum princess treatment with some moments of rough love (the latter courtesy of Shuji Hanma). They like to pamper and pamper you a lot, just allow yourself to enjoy it.
On dates YES OR YES the three of you go together. And the one who is usually planning spontaneous outings is Hanma. For more important events that require more planning (such as special dates) Kisaki takes care of, for the rest of the outings/appointments he just gets carried away by the rhythm of you two.
Their plans for an intimate afternoon is to warm up the three of them together between sheets and sweets while watching eternal marathons of movies or documentaries (hanma falls asleep after two films and you always wake him up before the marathon ends so that Kisaki doesn't notice).
Their first date as official couples was at an amusement park by your decision. It was quite an exhausting day for the three of them but they would be able to repeat it a thousand more times if with that they manage to see the exact definition of happiness in each other's smiles again.
When you and Hanma start a tickle fight, you run away in the direction of Kisaki's private studio hiding behind him because he never allows Hanma to enter that place. And you know it very well. That place is your safe zone. But once you take one foot out of there your immunity ends, and Hanma makes sure to get revenge by cornering you between the sofa and him with no escape option. Kisaki gives a soft smile when he hears them laughing in the distance.
At the same time, you and Hanma are good partners, teaming up as an unconscious act to make fun of anything Kisaki says or does.
Broadly speaking Kisaki in a refined, calculating, thoughtful, more elegant and formal type than any ordinary person. In this way he manages to keep his surroundings (and his inner world) under control and at peace. But unfortunately Kisaki can not go against the hyperstimulated souls of their partners. So when a situation in which his presence is completely protagonist and necessary gets stressed. Specifically because the ideas you and Hanma come up with can become terrifyingly exhausting for him. Going to fairs, concerts, parties, birthdays and similar events these are some examples.
Kisaki harbors a buttery side that melts faster when she's resting in your arms, whether you're stroking her hair or listening to her thoughts out loud. Not with this he says that he loves you more than Hanma, only you transmit to him a greater warmth and security compared to the noisy and annoying immature actions of the languid boy. Hanma, in turn, gets cheesier when she's alone with you. He feels that he can release his more cloying cuteness with you because he knows that you tolerate that kind of treatment more, and that you are not going to reject him or get irritated like it happens when he tries to be the same way with Kisaki. Still, none of you have preferences, all three of you love each other equally.
Hanma shows them how much he loves them and how important they are to him by spending quality time together: walks in the fresh air, outings to eat, watching movies at the cinema or at home, playing with board games/video games, etc. Anything that allows him to share his time with the two of you he will put into practice. Kisaki, on the other hand, applies physical contact: hands on the waist, caressing sessions, linked fingers, kisses on random areas of the body, massages, etc. In these ways Kisaki tries to convey to both of you all the love and appreciation he feels for you two, showing you a side that he doesn't have with anyone else.
Of course, this pair is a dangerous bombshell of jealousy and possession. Oh yeah, anyone who tries to step out of the line or even flirt with you won't have any functional organ or limb left to tell about it.
They also don't like to share you with others, no matter if it's your family or friends. Hanma is the most impatient and impulsive of the three, he won't even spend two hours when he's already holding your hand to take you with him and get you out of wherever you are without letting you properly excuse yourself. Kisaki is more patient and serene, entertaining his mind with other things until he can't stand it anymore and demands that you return by means of a call or he just goes to look for you. You better not ignore this couple when jealousy gets the better of them, or you're not going to have a great time afterwards.
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©2024 / ENJOY ♡ — aaaand I was finally able to finish it, I was too busy with classes 🥲🥲 I'll keep writing more about this trio eventually. Thank u for all your love and patience 🙌🏻 tkm
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CW: Mentions of physical violence and weapons.
"I am thinking I want a tattoo"
Remus felt happy and warm even if was winter, almost Christmas. Remus was feeling the festive mood for the first time. Besides the cold, besides the fact he had been robbed, that he didn't have a phone or the little money he kept, besides the fact that he had been hurt and that he missed his best friend already. Remus was relatively happy. There was one person to blame. And he was sitting next to him, very close to him.
"A tattoo?" Remus asked as he smiled.
"Yeah" Sirius nodded. He was drawing a friendly dog in the foggy window of the London Tube "I was thinking what Fen said yesterday. Do I really look like a delicate prince?"
Remus laughed despite the fact that it hurt to think about Fen and the boys. How they once were Remus's family. And just yesterday they tried to hurt Sirius and him. They hurt Grant. But luckily Grant would be safe and sound in Brighton by now.
Sirius’s dog had a speech bubble next to it. It read: "Hello Moony". Remus smiled.
"I want to look more badass if I am going to live in London" Sirius added.
"You're going to live in a posh neighborhood anyway, so it's fine"
Sirius poked out his tongue.
Sirius had been absolutely adorable during their trip to London. It was the first time Sirius visited the city for real. And though their mission had been to rescue Grant, which they managed successfully despite everything, Remus could tell Sirius had enjoyed it. He wanted more than ever to move into his Uncle's apartment.
"I am sorry for bringing the subject, Moony"
Seeing Sirius’s eyes of concern, Remus realized he had a sad expression. And he hated feeling that way for those people. But nobody understood what they had meant for him. Maybe only Grant.
"It's okay, I am fine"
"No, you are not" Sirius prompted "And it's okay. I get it"
Fen had been drunk and probably on drugs when he took out his knife. And when he hit and kicked Remus on the ribs. He still had the bruises. More than the ones he used to have. But what he said had been circulating Remus's brain all day: "Ye'r a traitor! Yeh abandoned us to play to be a posh boy in a posh school. We've used ter be Yer family and yeh left us"
Remus didn't regret going to Hogwarts. It had been the best decision of his life. Not only because he was able to see Sirius again. But in Hogwarts he had met the best people he could find. Now comparing with what he used to have with Fen and the others, Remus realized he didn't know what real friendship looked like, what real love looked like.
"I tried distracting you with Andromeda and Ted"
"And Nymphadora"
"Just call her Dora" Sirius shivered "That name is horrid"
Remus laughed.
Sirius’s smile showed how much he liked his little family. He only had Andromeda and Regulus now. He had been so happy to spend the day with them. Right before The Holidays. Probably it hadn't been like with The Potters. But they were his family.
"I had a really good time with them"
And it had made Remus love Sirius more. He didn't think it was possible to love someone so much. Even if they were just friends.
Sirius, now bored with the drawings on the window, found another distraction in playing with Remus's wrist bands. Every time Sirius touched his skin, Remus felt shivers down his spine.
"I didn't want to let Regulus go" Sirius added with a sad tone.
The Black Brothers were a total Rollercoaster. Remus had seen them fight like cats and dogs one moment. And then act like best friends at the other. While at The Tonks' they had been at peace. Teasing each other occasionally, but fine. Until Regulus said he was coming back to Grimmauld Place for the rest of the Holidays.
"I can believe he keeps choosing them over me"
"He is going to be fine, Pads"
At this point, they were gently touching each other's fingers and palms. Innocent play. But with a lot of meaning in between.
"He is too vulnerable" Sirius added with disdain "Reg is going to let them manipulate him. Something they wanted to do with me"
Remus couldn't help but rub his shoulders. Something a friend would do to comfort him.
"Regulus is very clever. He won't do anything he doesn't want to"
Sirius took a deep breath "Let's not talk about it. It's almost Christmas. I want to take advantage of our moments together before going back to Hogwarts"
"What do you want to do?" Remus asked in amusement "It's almost midnight and we don't have any money left"
"Only what Andy gave to me" Sirius smirked
"For our train tickets for tomorrow" Remus reminded him.
"We still have something left to buy some wine"
"She said that was for tickets and food"
"I am not hungry. Ate plenty at The Tonks. You?"
Remus wanted to smile. Remus wanted to say yes to everything. Remus wanted to follow Sirius anywhere. And do whatever he said. Because Remus loved him.
"I am always hungry. You know that" Remus teased.
"We'll buy some snacks with the wine"
Remus smiled now "You are impossible" he said. Sirius smiled innocently. Remus wanted to kiss him. "Add some fags to the list. Fen left me clean"
That made Sirius laugh "Deal"
The whole ride back to Alphard's flat was full of gentle touches and closeness. Remus let Sirius place his legs on his lap. They were wrapped around each other like some puzzle pieces that fit perfectly together. They held hands. Sirius was scooping closer and closer. Placing his head on Remus's shoulder. Remus was getting addicted to Sirius’s smell and warmth.
Somehow it was a mixture of perfection and the slow craving of more. Remus didn't want to think how friends weren't supposed to do this. He didn't want to measure how romantic or how platonic this was. It was just happening.
They had always been close. Even before they started kissing and doing other stuff. Especially now that they had shared secrets and everything was at the open. It was clear they loved each other. And if Remus didn't think much about how or what they were, he could enjoy what he was having with Sirius.
"We should probably call Prongs to tell him we are alive"
Once in the flat, Remus was at ease. He didn't want to think about the fact that he would spend the night alone with Sirius. The night before, Grant had been something to focus. But now, it was only the two of them.
"Call him. I'll light the fireplace. It is freezing in here"
In front of the chimney and after several glasses of wine and some cigarettes, Remus was relaxed and warm.
"Alphard had taste for many things, not for decorating I am afraid" Sirius commented as he looked around.
Remus had been too worried about Grant last night to appreciate this place. Now more at ease, his eyes wandered around. Everything looked expensive and luxurious. Only the best that money could buy. Though Sirius was right. The decorations made the place look a bit ancient.
"Did you know my Uncle used to make hell of parties in this very place?"
Remus smiled "Yeah?"
"Brought many lovers in here as well" Sirius added, then chuckled "Imagine all the sex these walls had witnessed"
Remus was mid sip of his wine when he choked by the comment.
"If walls could talk" Sirius raised his eyebrows teasingly.
"I'm not sure you'd want to listen to those stories" Remus commented.
"My Uncle was a true slag" Sirius took a sip of his drink "At least he had fun"
Remus couldn't believe he was blushing. He was a bit drunk. And fuck it, he was getting hornier. He had promised himself he could be just Sirius’s friend. But it was impossible not to want him if he was so bloody pretty.
"How about you?" Remus asked with stupid drunk confidence "Are you bringing lovers when you move in?"
"I am having parties as well" Sirius answered looking only to the fire.
"What about the lovers?"
Sirius’s eyes fixed on Remus. The boy was out of breath for a second. Sirius scooped closer. Time felt like it had been stopped. Sirius hesitated before touching Remus's curls. Remus let him. Sirius’s hand moved towards his ear. Remus froze. Sirius caressed his neck delicately. Remus closed his eyes because the gesture was giving tiny shots of pleasure.
"I brought you, didn't I?" Sirius whispered before leaning in for a kiss.
It took all the strength in the world to look away and not kiss Sirius back.
"Sirius," Remus began with a trembling voice "You know we can't do this"
Sirius wasn't expecting that answer clearly. He looked hurt. And a bit confused.
"Yeah sorry" Sirius pursed his lips in disappointment "Just best friends, I get it"
"You were the one who said you needed time to figure things out" Remus snapped angrily.
Sirius wasn't supposed to be the hurt one. Not after everything he had made Remus go through.
"Yeah I know" Sirius shrugged, trying to sound uninterested "I just wanted to kiss you" he looked down to his empty cup "It's probably the wine"
But Remus's temper had changed. Everything was so fine with Sirius, so glorious, so brilliant, until he ruined it all.
"Fuck it, Sirius, you know very well how I feel about you" Remus said as he raised to his feet to pour himself more wine. He needed to be drunker.
"It was just a silly kiss, Remus, relax"
Remus turned in surprising speed, almost spilling the bottle on the carpet.
"I do want to kiss you!" And maybe he raised his voice a little "I love you!" he added, taking Sirius by surprise. Although he had said it many times already "But all you do is play with me when you want. You might be used to everyone being at your feet and maybe I used to be at your feet myself. But I can't do this anymore"
Sirius’s expression turned to fury. Eyes glistening by tears. He rose to his feet as well.
"You think I do this to mess up with you? Of course not, Moony! I want you for real"
Their yells echoed through the empty walls reminding both that no one had lived in that place for months. The ghost of the lonely man that used to own the flat was long gone. Perhaps the place hadn't known love. Maybe sex, fun and parties but not love.
"I know you do" Remus answered "But I don't want to be wanted by you. I want to be loved by you, Padfoot!"
Sirius opened his mouth to say something he didn't dare. Instead he replied with:
"Fuck me, Remus! You love to play this game as well. Who was touchy touchy with me in tube just hours ago? You've been all over me all day!"
Remus snorted in disbelief.
"You are the one who taunts me all the time with your touchy shows of affection and your flirtatious words!" Sirius replied with rage "I said I needed time!"
"What do you want me to do? Bloody ignore you?? We were supposed to be fucking friends, weren't we?"
"I don't think we can be friends" Sirius tutted "Everything is ruined now. Are we going to be awkward forever?"
"You are the one who made it awkward"
"Fuck you! You were practically begging me to kiss you!"
"Fuck you! You're the slag that threw himself at me!"
"And now you're acting like a prude, ha?"
Just like that the little spark turned into a fire, burning everything around them. How easily they exploded with words that hurt each other like daggers when minutes before it was good between them. Remus was sick and tired of how much Sirius made him hate him. Just like he was tired of how much Sirius made him love him. All at the same time.
"GO FUCK YOURSELF, SIRIUS!"
Sirius’s force was unstoppable as he approached.
"FUCK ME YOURSELF, YOU COWARD!"
Before Remus could react, Sirius pulled him by his neck into the most passionate snog, the hottest kiss he had ever experienced.
And God knows Remus tried to fight against it, but seconds later he gave into it faster than falling from a cliff. He opened his mouth for Sirius’s tongue. Remus tasted heaven for a second before Sirius broke apart. Remus would have protested but Sirius only needed seconds to whisper the next words:
"I am crazy in love with you, Moony. You drive me insane"
Sirius’s words were rushed and Remus didn't have time to process them. Sirius was attacking his mouth again. Remus was distracted with pinches of pleasure on his mouth as he felt Sirius’s tongue again. And pinches of pleasure when Sirius’s fingers ran through his hair.
When the message was processed by his brain, all Remus could do was smile between kisses. And he carried on. He carried on. Nobody could stop him now.
Remus didn't know how they got to one of the rooms, probably Alphard's, Remus didn't care. They were suddenly fully snogging on the softest bed Remus had touched. Sirius on top of him.
Remus's body raised in temperature. He realized he was only a human and needed air to survive only when Sirius detached his lips from Remus's mouth to his neck. Remus had only microseconds of air until it became difficult to breathe again for the delicious thing Sirius was doing to his neck.
Remus's instinct was to press him closer to him. And the sound that came out of their mouths was almost animalistic. It made Remus laugh.
"God, I love you"
Sirius let out a little snort on his collarbone.
"Moony, Moony, Moony.... I love you more"
Remus felt like fireworks on his chest. Those three words were better than any kiss or touch that Sirius could give him. That euphoric feeling made him smile to the dark.
Sirius giggled "Of course I love you. And I am scared of how much"
Remus caressed Sirius’s back in response. Then he stroked his soft hair.
"Sorry," Sirius added, looking down at Remus. They smiled at each other "I swear I didn't bring you here for this. And I certainly wasn't planning to confess my feelings like that. But, oh Moons, you made it difficult"
Remus chuckled "Well, you shouldn't have tried to kiss me in the first place"
"You looked adorable and irresistible" Sirius pouted. "What was I supposed to do?"
Remus let out a little laugh.
Sirius began playing with Remus's hair as if that gesture didn't drive him crazy.
"We don't have to do this if you don't want" Sirius said. Remus noticed the nervousness in his voice. He adored this vulnerable Sirius.
"You mean..."
Sirius bit his lip "What I said about my Uncle is true. But it was stupid to bring it up. You make me say stupid things, Moons"
"Yeah, blame me" Remus teased, making Sirius hit his arm playfully.
"I want you" Sirius added, and the way he said it sent shivers down Remus's spine "But it's okay if you want to wait"
"Are you proposing me to have sex with you in the same place your Uncle probably had sex with several men?"
"Way to bring the mood down, Moony"
Remus giggled. He was an idiot. He had only said that to hide the fact he was really really nervous. He admired Sirius for talking about this upfront. That's how Sirius got what he wanted most of the time.
Remus had wanted this for a long time. He had imagined it in his head. They were alone. Something that would be difficult back at Hogwarts. And he was completely in love with this boy. So why not? The only problem was that Remus was utterly scared. Mainly of what Sirius would say about his body. What if he didn't like it? What if he found it disgusting?
Stupid bloody fear.
Sirius must've read his mind because he took it as a red light. So he rolled to the side, panting to the ceiling.
"We should probably finish the wine and go to sleep, Moons. Prongs made me promise we would be at the Castle in the morning. It's Christmas Eve tomorrow, remember?"
Remus didn't want to go to sleep. He didn't want to lose the opportunity to be with Sirius. He was dying to touch him and show him how much he loved him. Hell, he was a teenage boy in love. He couldn't wait to have his top surgery to have sex, right? He wanted Sirius more than he had wanted anything.
So he rolled to his side, took Sirius’s shirt and pulled him into a wet desperate kiss. Sirius responded willingly.
In no time, they were all over each other again.
Remus pulled Sirius’s shirt off. And Sirius did the same with his. Sirius kissed the bruises and scars Fen had left the day before.
"I want you to be the first, Sirius" Remus whispered to the other boy in the dark. "I want to be yours forever"
Remus felt how Sirius's heart speed up with his words and Remus could've sworn seeing him blushing even in the poor light. Sirius was absolutely gorgeous and God how much Remus loved him.
"But I am not taking this off" Remus added, pointing to his binder "Is that okay?"
Sirius nodded at once. His eyes were shining as he said: "You're so beautiful, Remus".
The fact that he used his name made everything more real. Remus believed him.
"I love you" Sirius added shyly.
Remus smiled.
"I think I've loved you since the first day I saw you. I just didn't know it. I was a fool ten year old boy"
Remus touched his cheek. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He couldn't believe Sirius felt the same. Remus had loved this boy since he was a kid. This love had seemed impossible, unreachable and one-sided for so long that Remus couldn't believe it had been the same for Sirius. They had been terrible idiots.
"If you're saying things to get me horny, let me tell you I already am"
That comment made them laugh but also break the ice. And cut the little tension they were having for their potential first time.
"And here I was trying to declare my sweet love to you, Moons" Sirius tutted "You have to make everything sexual..."
"Shut up and kiss me" Remus interrupted with a sweet delicate kiss.
A kiss that started everything. Nothing stopped them after that. There was no time for words. But they told each other everything with touches and sighs of pleasure. The walls of that flat witnessed something extraordinary. Not only hot and messy sex once again. But the most honest demonstration of love. Remus liked to believe they had been the first ones to make magic while making love.
Remus would remember it as the happiest night of his life.
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superblizzardfire · 2 years
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Bruce and Hulk are Secretly Separate
Bruce Banner & Hulk for @marvelrarepairbingo2022​
Rating: Gen
Summary: Bruce and Hulk are actually separate people. Steve discovers this when he walks in on them showering together.
Warnings: None
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Steve walks across the gym floor, his steps echoing off the high walls.
Lately, he’s fallen into the habit of working out when everyone else has gone to bed. It’s the only time he can be sure of peace and quiet.
It’s been three months since the Avengers moved in at the tower. He wonders if anyone else is finding it hard to settle in.
He’s so deep in thought that when he walks into the locker room he doesn’t immediately notice the hiss of the showers running. Steve hesitates, not wanting to disturb a fellow teammate having a dark night of the soul. He ran into Clint here last week and it was... awkward.
‘Don’t look at me like that,’ Bruce says from around the corner, ‘they didn’t have any lavender shampoo left.’
Steve freezes, then pulls back a step. If Bruce is showering with someone, this could get really awkward.
The second voice is rumbling and loud and very, very familiar. ‘Hulk hate lemon shampoo!’
Steve jumps, his heart suddenly pounding. Bruce is Hulking out, should he summon the team?
‘You stink,’ Bruce continues, in his own voice again. ‘I’d rather you stink of lemon and eucalyptus. I’ll get lavender next time, I promise.’
Hulk grunts in annoyance. Vigorous scrubbing sounds follow.
It sounds as if Bruce and Hulk are communicating. That’s interesting, Bruce never mentioned that they could converse. And they’re being surprisingly civil to each other. Curious, Steve peeks around the corner.
In the giant shower room, a naked Hulk sits cross-legged on the floor, pouting like an oversized toddler. Sitting on his shoulder is Bruce, who is wearing swimming trunks and soaping up Hulk’s hair with visible effort.
If he wasn’t a supersoldier with perfect vision, Steve would have thought he was seeing things. Even so, he has to blink a few times. Bruce and Hulk continue washing in front of him. ‘Bruce? Hulk?!’
They both look up with wide eyes, caught in the act. ‘Hi, Steve,’ Bruce says eventually, shifting his balance as Hulk twists around to look at him. ‘Uh, would you believe me if I said this isn’t what it looks like?’
Read the rest on AO3!
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iwasbored777 · 1 year
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You're gonna cancel me for this but Idc I've always been controversial....
Lila and Chloé are doing the "let's stop being rivals bc of a boy and be friends instead" much better than Marinette and Kagami. I know that Lila and Chloé don't feel that kind of love for Adrien but their friendship is built on unity and trust, the first two's relationship is so one-sided that I wonder why are the writers even acting this is a friendship.
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allsassnoclass · 2 years
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....
#going to do another fandom-related vent once again i don't want anyone to take it personally#this is just me thinking out loud this isn't a call-out this isn't me condemning anyone for how they behave online or interact with fandom#content. how many of these tags do i have to put so people can scroll past without expanding the meat of the post#is this good???? okay i think this is good now#i think. it would do well for all of us to remember that men can and should be platonically physically affectionate with each other#throughout this tour i have seen a lot of people describe stuff the boys have been doing as ''really gay'' and it's been rubbing me the#wrong way because the majority of these things are just. normal stuff i would do with my friends#and i know that it's not in bad taste. i know the people saying these things (that i've seen and who i follow) aren't actually speculating#on sexuality or labeling the lads without consent#but as someone who really values platonic love it's been really bothering me the more and more i see it#boys can cuddle with their friends. they can give each other compliments. these things are not inherently romantic or inherently gay#i also get excited when they show affection to each other! but some of the freak outs over comparatively small things are just. idk#idk man i just personally don't like calling certain actions gay when they're actually just normal friend things.#these guys care very deeply about each other i don't think it's amazing or unheard of for them to be touchy and verbally affectionate#they SHOULD be hugging each other and spinning each other around!#they SHOULD be calling each other attractive and hyping each other up!#they SHOULD be physically comfortable with each other in photos#men should be affectionate with guys they've been best friends with for a decade! especially coming out of their longest time spent apart#this isn't a piece of media we're analyzing these are just guys being dudes#and i don't think hugs and compliments and affection should be limited to romantic relationships#yeah. idk. it's just something i've noticed throughout this entire tour cycle that has been progressively bothering me more#i don't think we should erase the platonic love they have for each other by calling every little piece of affection they show ''gay''#that's just my thoughts and opinions
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oatbugs · 1 year
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lightning fried our satellite dish and now we are alone
#old geometry on old walls + her hand flowing along the river delta. sudden stop pulls on stitches#you are not allowed to laugh unrestrained for the next two months. in the next world#i look at the shape of the sun and i the tangerine you offered to your brother. do you feel#artificial ? do you feel man-made? what is more natural than man ? what is more natural than the creation of a natural thing?#do you feel like an organic automaton? will you love me if i change? will i love you if you change? if i prophesise about#not loving you it wont change the fact that i wont stop loving you. you are going to draw again because in a few weeks#you have to paint something sacred along the length of my spine. my friend asks me if im okay#and in my head i want to scream at her IM JUST HAPPY YOU'RE ALIVE. im sorry we were both in pain. im sorry you have to think about#endings. i will think about your beginnings. the air here feels like spring and i think of you every day.#my boy texts me on the train station about the snow and how he waited 4 hours in the underground. he said his hands were shaking#and i thought of how much i missed holding his hands. you were freezing on the train i was burning in the sky.#of course your password is phi. just like her. i miss you all. 10 friends teaching each other how to slow dance#in the kitchen. 10 friends cook a feast together and say goodbye. the last thing i told the boy who was once#in love with me was that i wont say goodbye because no one would care to hear it. the last thing he said was fair enough.#im glad you kissed me when i was drunk. i am visiting my town by the sea for the first time in a decade and i hope to#peel it open and bite again. my love، how do i make you feel? pomegranate cracked open. you saw the blood inside#and you dug your hands inwards. messed up through all the red، you still bit in.#i will make you feel safe enough so you can lose your mind again. you can create again#im sorry i didnt realise how much you had missed me. im sorry i didnt realise thats a part of why you stopped creating#i am not sorry that it matters so much. it matters because i love you. ill be back soon. keep cracking me open. ill keep cracking you open.#world of chroma blue and crimson. a girl asks a policeman for direction without a headscarf on. this was an act of war. i reveal my own#hair in the wind and think of how much i love you. i stare at the policeman through the eyes of the slaughtered.#my lovely economist drinks up the ocean and i think of her beautiful hair with its bloody ends in the wind#chase your dreams. dont say goodbye. politics is an act of love. i look at the killer with the eyes of those he killed and i think of#kissing you over the river kissing you in your bed kissing you before you left kissing you until we were late kissing you goodbye#for five consecutive days kissing you in the train station kissing you in the rolling fields kissing you by the cityscape kissing your neck#until it bled. i love you. i will kiss you until you can create again.#i miss my love i miss my starlights and i miss the sky. one day ill make you tomato soup again.#and now it is time to replace a very old very young self.
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