#just can’t help but feel like a betrayal when people take your openness but don’t think to give it back

[moonchildwildheart]

Exactly how I’ve seen it this whole time👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 now it’s coming from the shows creator (weirdly validating?) It’s like if I’m so open and honest why isn’t it just natural for you to be as open with me? It’s just a very hard concept when you’re younger to understand that not everyone is like that

#when I tell you maxine and I are of the same mind #just can’t help but feel like a betrayal when people take your openness but don’t think to give it back #I’m in my twenties now and I’m still confused that not everyone is so open but I’ve learned I can’t get upset from it #that’s what you get when watching a show about teenagers! you have to watch them before they’ve learned that! #ginny and georgia #maxine baker

[acciocriativity]

-> When they reject you…

… but it wasn't a confession (MATZ Version)

Genre: angst (I'm sorry)

Warnings/tags: angst; unrequited love (?); Seonghwa being a little asshole; heartbreak; just betrayal guys

WC: 1,4 k

N/A: Yes, this is inspired by that Colin scene in Bridgerton, to be honest I still not forgave him for that.

Please reblog my work if you enjoyed it, it helps to reach other people <3

Ateez Masterlist

Park Seonghwa (박성화)

You had no reason to be up right now. Actually if anything, you should’ve been sleeping for hours now to rest for the early morning ahead of you, yet somehow you were still waiting to make sure he was safe and sound.

You heard them from the hallway, a combination of the dead silence in the building and their loud voices. You heard only sounds that didn’t make any sense to you, but it made you get up in hurry.

This isn’t good, there was something wrong with Seonghwa, you knew it.

The apartment was small, there wasn’t stairs to go down or a long way to cross to reach the door. In a few steps after you left your room, Seonghwa’s and Yunho’s voices became clear to you.

“Shh, keep your voice down, are you trying to wake everyone up?”, Yunho whisper-screamed, but his tone was far from angry, there was a residue of laughter on his voice.

“No”, he almost whined as you heard the constant jiggles from Seonghwa’s chains bag, like he was struggling against Yunho. “I told you I don’t want to live with her anymore, take me to the dorms for the night”.

That took you by surprise, you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

Ever since you two became roommates two years ago, he never gave you any signs that he needs some time away from your company, which would be completely okay, but to hear him say that to his friend made you feel so humiliated. You tried so hard to be friendly, to make him and all of his friends at home and all he did was pretend to do the same, welcoming you into his life.

Was this how he talked about you behind your back? Did they all know he hated living with you?

You feel something burning, maybe it was the bit of love for him, you had or the tears you refused to cry over this.

“Hyung, com’on, it's not that bad, you need to sleep and think clearly about this”, Yunho tried his best for a while, you could tell this wasn’t the first or second time he said those words.

They got closer to the door, only then you realized you were spying on them. If you were embarrassed before, now you felt mortified, but somehow you couldn’t move an inch.

What exactly made him feel uncomfy at home, because you were completely in the dark about those feelings, whatever they were. Did he seem off those days? You can’t remember, he was as sweet to you as he’s always been. But the man on the other side of the door was done, he was huffing and puffing like an immature child because he didn’t want to be at your home. The Seonghwa you thought was a friend couldn’t be more different than the man you are listening to right now.

“She is that bad”.

You breathe in.

There’s no way, absolutely no way.

“You should just tell her, y’ know”, Yunho said in that soft tone you hear more than once directed at you.

“I did”, Seonghwa raised his voice and that startles you. “She just doesn’t get the hint, I gave her too many signs to move on already”.

You don’t hear whatever answer Yunho gave him nor the sequential sounds of each number of the door code. You could only hear all the deep conversations you had together, where he told you he would be there for you anytime you needed, that he’d give a shoulder when you needed one. He was the one that made you open up to him and for what?

The door opened wide

They stood there like two idiots caught dirty-handed. Seonghwa couldn’t look at you in the eyes, a fucking coward he truly was. He was just like the others in your life, your worst nightmare became true.

There were tears pooling in your eyes as you closed more and more in your own head again, all of those months worth of improvement wasted.

Your mind screamed for you to move, to run out of there as fast as you could to as far as possible. But why should you? The voice in your head was bitter and angry. This was your apartment at first, even though you didn’t hesitate to call it ‘our’.

“Leave then, am I forcing you to live here with me? Did I even say I was interested in you? Get your shit by tomorrow night and get off my face.

You shut the door close on their faces.

Kim Hongjoong (김홍중)

The library wasn’t as empty as you wished it would be at 21:39, to study or do something near closing hours would be pointless for most, but you needed only more 79 words to finish your essay and your mama raised no bitch.

You watch the numbers change on your phone, exactly 20 minute from now you have to finish this. You’ve been here all evening, you can’t bring yourself to do it at home. No, you are going to finish this, get home, get a nice shower and re—

“I think you’re actually going insane, no offense though”.

You could recognize that voice anywhere. That fucker said he didn’t have time to study with you, again. Did he come to check on me? The thought crossed your head, but you shut it down just as fast, that wouldn’t make any sense, would it? He was ignoring you for a week now, no calls, no texts, nothing. Did he even know you were here? He would, if he saw the text you sent at noon.

You stared at your screen, the white was blurring your vision after so long. You took that as a sign to take a little 5-minute break.

Alright Hongjoong, this is your last chance to redeem yourself, this is the last time I’d bother to try.

You couldn’t see where he was from your seat, but his voice seemed to be coming from the sets of tables on the other side of the bookshelves. At the very least he deserved a little jump scare, he should have it coming as payback, so you don’t feel bad as you tiptoed to spy on where he was.

You moved a couple books to the side to see it better. He had his phone glued to his ear as he paced around. Distracted, as you needed, but the little mischievous demon on your shoulder disappeared as you paid close attention to his distressed disposition. There were few moments where you saw him so tense and stressed. Whatever the other person was saying, wasn’t good news.

“No, that’s… I see, but that makes it worse, no? I can’t tell her like this, hm…”

The lilac pencil case on top of the table distracted you from the big picture. The table was a mess from two people, the distinction was clear as day. Hongjoong wouldn’t be caught dead with anything other than black or red on his bag. It was clear it wasn’t his, so whose was?

The answer walked in with a concerned look on her face. Was that the ‘her’ in the conversation? He ended the call as soon as she got close. They stood near each other, too near for two people who just met.

“Are you sure she’s going to be okay?”, she leaned into him as if on instinct, a feeling you could relate to, he had something in him that attract people to him.

He took a deep breath. “I don’t know, I wish to keep a normal friendship with her someday”.

“It’s better to just call her, it’s been long enough for her to get over you”.

Is this ‘her’ me? You hoped not, whatever this was, you hated.

You felt sick to your stomach as they held hands, so you left Hongjoong alone, like he clearly wanted to. He wasn’t the type to open up to new people, she wasn’t new, and he never told you about it. There wasn’t secrets in your friendship, at least he said so, but there was a lot you don’t know, apparently.

If that’s you… if he was talking about you, did he just ignore you for almost two weeks because he thought you would get in the middle of his relationship?

You phone rang.

It was him, but you didn’t bother to answer, and he didn’t bother to try again. There’s nothing to salvage anymore.

Tag list: @h3arteyes4mingi

#ateez x reader #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #ateez reactions #ateez headcanons #ateez masterlist #hongjoong x reader #seonghwa x reader #ateez angst #seonghwa reactions

[hayakawalove]

Test of Love (Chapter Three)

Chapter Three

All Chapters

Summary: After finding out about the connection between the two boys, you find yourself in a world of confusion. At least Gojo is there to help you through it.

A/N: Just to remind everyone, if you like this fic I have tons of other poly satosugu fics too, although they aren't long fics.

CW: Smut, cunnilingus, angst, nipple play, dirty talk, Female Reader, AFAB Reader W/C: 7,062

Credit to @benkeibear for the banner

“Satoru, you said you wouldn’t be back until 11.” Suguru chides, throwing over his shoulder. 

Satoru. Satoru as in… 

You peek your head around the tall man in front of you, catching sight of Gojo lounging on his couch, long arms spread behind him. A low ringing kicks up in your ears as you tear your eyes away from him, bringing them to look up at Suguru. They must be talking, but you don’t hear it. Your mind is on repeat as you force yourself to connect the dots. 

“You’re asshole?” You feel your lips move. 

Gojo narrows his eyes at you like he isn’t sure what you’re talking about before he glares at Suguru. 

“You haven’t changed my name yet?” He pouts. 

“I think it’s quite fitting, don’t you?” Suguru answers back. 

“And you’re Geto?” You glance up at Suguru. 

He’s wearing a soft smile, eyes pinched up as you work through the moment. 

“That would be me, yeah.” 

However intoxicated you felt earlier in the night was suddenly gone. The reality of the situation seeps in your bones. 

“Oh, you must be the unknown number in her phone.” Gojo looks up towards the ceiling, recalling your earlier conversation. 

“You don’t know what my number is? We’ve been together for years.” 

“There’s never been a need to memorize it!”

“And this is why your name is asshole in my phone.” Suguru shakes his head, ushering you inside before closing the door. 

The two are arguing but it’s hard to hear them over the pounding in your head. They were dating? They seemed so different, but when you were looking at them now you were starting to realize all the similarities. It was in the little things, like how they spoke and how they held themselves. 

Even if the evidence was laid out in front of you, it was still hard to believe it. 

Not only were they dating, but Suguru was a sorcerer. An amazing one. 

“Hold on, you were seeing two guys who were in open relationships, and you didn’t think they were the same?” Gojo asks, his eyes looking over his sunglasses, staring through you. “That’s kind of on you.” 

He wasn’t completely wrong. 

“Shut up Satoru, you didn’t know either.” Suguru says. 

Gojo clicks his tongue, dragging his eyes from you to Suguru. 

“And you did?” 

“I did, but nice try.” 

You furrow your brows and gawk at Suguru. He knew and didn’t tell you? A strike of betrayal shoots through you. You looked like an idiot now, and Suguru knew? 

“For how long?” You find yourself asking. 

“I was never positive. I could sense your cursed energy. Satoru told me about a teacher from school he’s been seeing. Not many teachers our age who are Jujutsu sorcerers.” 

You drag your eyes to the ground, listening to his explanation. There was a chance he could have been wrong, but he had a point, the odds of that were low. 

“How come I can’t see your cursed energy?” You question. 

“Masking it. I usually do when meeting new people. You don’t know what people’s intentions are.” 

There’s a pit in your stomach, and you can’t force yourself to look at either of them. Did you even really know Suguru if he was keeping this from you? 

You felt like a fucking idiot. 

“Here, why don’t I get you some water. Sit down.” Suguru guides you towards the couch, next to Gojo whose eyes follow your every movement. 

Suguru’s palm on your back feels like an iron weight as he moves you. Minutes ago his tongue was down your throat and now you didn’t want him touching you. 

Suguru takes his leave to grab you water, leaving you to sit alone with Gojo. The silence is deafening as you sit next to each other, his eyes on you. You think he must be using his technique to see if he could find any answers in you. He comes up dry. You weren’t sure what you felt. 

“Here.” Suguru’s voice is soft as he stands in front of you, a cool water bottle resting in his hand. 

You reach out for it and crack it open, allowing the cold liquid to flow down your throat. 

“Were you bringing her here to have sex?” Gojo asks. 

You try not to choke on the water but you’re left sputtering. Suguru’s brows are furrowed as he looks at Gojo. 

“Yes, why?” 

“Our bed? I mean, now that I know who it is I don’t care but like really?” 

“We agreed on-“ 

You tighten the cap back on the bottle and look up, forcing your eyes to drag between the two. They were fighting like an old married couple. That sounded about right, considering they’ve been together for a long time. 

“Guys.” You break your silence. 

Both of their eyes fall to you, a mixture of concern on Suguru’s face while Gojo’s shows expectant eyes. 

What do you even say? 

“I’m sorry. Sometimes Satoru and I argue.” Suguru admits, his face pointing downward to look at you. 

You felt so small between their gazes. 

“And I’m sorry for not telling you. I should have. I just didn’t know when to bring it up.” 

The apology does little to quell your anger, but you don’t say anything. 

“Actually, this makes sense. Us seeing the same girl. I mean doesn’t it? Now that we all know, we could just be together.” Gojo says. 

“Or you could be with us separately, I mean that’s more boring I think-“ he continues. 

“Satoru.” 

The way he says Gojo’s name causes a chill to run up your spine. Gojo immediately closes his mouth. You’ve never seen that happen before. Suguru sighs and slides a hand down his face. He sits next to you, caging you in between the two of them. You really felt small. Their broad frames lock you in, leaving you feeling jittery. Silence overtakes the room. 

“What do you wanna do now?” Suguru asks, checking his watch. “You can crash here if you want or I can take you back home. We can figure this all out another time when it’s not so late.” 

You play with the hem of your dress, the same hem Suguru ran his fingers along, while thinking. You didn’t really want to be here any longer, but you also didn’t wanna be home. It was hard to decide which was worse. 

“Take me home.” You notice as the two of them visibly deflate at your words. 

“Okay.” Suguru stands up again, offering you his hand which you don’t take. 

“I’ll see you at school tomorrow.” Gojo says. 

You mumble an agreement before keeping your eyes down as you follow Suguru to the door. He says goodbye to Gojo before opening the door, letting you walk out first.

The apartment building looks much different than it did initially, as you no longer had a heavy cloud of lust over your head. The halls still made you dizzy, but for an entirely different reason. When you get to the bottom floor, you see one of the attendants raise a brow at you, no doubt wondering what had occurred. 

You follow Suguru to his car without speaking, only murmuring a thanks when he opens your car door for you. He did that earlier in the night too, and you found it so sweet. Yet his actions felt somehow disingenuous now that you learned he was hiding a major part about himself. 

You were hiding something as well, but that was because you had no idea who he was. Suguru had no excuse. 

Suguru slides in his seat before starting the car. The air between you is awkward now, with both of your minds racing. He navigates his way easily to your house, as there weren’t as many cars on the street. You don’t speak, but neither does he. What would either of you even say? ‘I'm sorry that I didn’t tell you my boyfriend was the other man you’re seeing. Also I’m a Jujutsu sorcerer.’ ‘It’s okay, it’s fine that you didn’t tell me those things even if they are big parts about who you are.’ It was a strange situation to put it mildly. You rest your head against the window and keep your eyes squeezed shut, hoping this was all a dream. 

The car stops and when your eyes flutter open you see your apartment in front of the car. Suguru makes no move, so you lean forward to get out. 

“Look, I-“ he says, his hand reaching forward to grab your bare leg. He stops short, clenching his fist before flexing his fingers. 

You wished the warmth of his hand would comfort you right now. 

“I really am sorry. I should have told you. I just didn’t know when to bring it up. That’s not an excuse. I’m sorry.” He has the nerve to sound genuine. 

You turn to look up at him and see the worry sketching his face. You hadn’t known him for a long time, but you wanted to believe in his honesty. Suguru waits for you to say something, but you can’t find any words to fix the situation.

“Thank you for taking me home.” You say, opening your car door and slipping out. 

Suguru’s car remains parked until you reach your apartment, only driving away once you’re inside. You knew it was sick, but you wanted them to beg you to stay. You weren’t even sure why. 

When you get inside, you immediately start to strip. Maybe a shower would make you feel better. You stand in front of your bathroom mirror, dragging your eyes across your body. You were right, a bruise was beginning to form on your thigh from where Suguru gripped you. Your eyes glide down to your throat where you see multiple marks caused by his mouth. 

They’re tender to the touch as you slide your hand down your body, reminiscing about the night. You were having so much fun, why did the night have to end like this? 

The water burns your skin as you step inside, but you make no move to adjust the temperature. You were hoping the heat would snap you out, waking you from this dream. It didn’t, making you come to terms that this was really happening. 

When you’re finished with the shower you jump out and throw old pajamas on, before sliding under the covers. 

You dream about tufts of white hair and fox eyes. 

~~~

You don’t talk to Suguru when you wake up in the morning. He doesn’t text you either. You’re sure it’s under the guise of giving you space, but you’re not sure that’s what you want. 

You were conflicted, wanting to pretend like nothing happened while simultaneously also being mad. 

It’s your class’s rotation on standing guard outside to ensure no attacks are made, and so far nothing has happened. You sit next to them, only turning around when it becomes quiet. Yuuta’s leaned against a tree, drool pooling at the corner of his lips while he slept. Maki wasn’t far off either, her head bobbing as she tried to stay awake. They had been out here for the past several hours, so you couldn’t blame them. Even you were beginning to feel tired. You check your phone, noting the time. There were two hours left of the shift, but you couldn’t force yourself to wake them up. They were only kids, even though they had seen more than most adults, and they worked hard. You figured you might as well complete the shift, it wasn’t like you had anything better to do. 

You nudge them awake and tell them to go back to their dorms. Maki tries to argue, but relents after you give her a deadpan stare. You watch as their silhouettes disappear, immediately feeling a sense of loneliness crawl over you. You stretch your arms and legs, and sit against the ground. Looking up you notice it was a clear night, the moon bright as stars filled the sky.

You aren’t sure how much time passes, only the sounds of crickets and wind keeping you company. Your lids are heavy as you try to make yourself stay awake, the slow humming of night life lulling you to sleep. 

“Hey, what’re you doing out here alone?” 

“Jesus- fuck!” You jump and look beside you, seeing Gojo standing next to you. 

You will your heart to calm down before you respond to him. 

“Yaga should put a bell on you.” You flick your eyes back up to him. 

“He tried, I said it was kinky then he promptly took it off.” 

You snort and look back up at the moon. 

“My students were starting to fall asleep so I let them go early.” 

“You look seconds from passing out yourself.” 

He got you there. 

“Are you mad at Suguru?” He questions. 

You sigh and lean back against your hands. It was comforting to have someone else here. Gojo was always a nice person to have around, and it wasn’t just because of his strength. You genuinely liked his presence. 

“He just- wait, how did you know?” 

“I didn’t but you just confirmed it. Although you weren’t really being subtle yesterday.” 

You glance back at Gojo, noting how he appeared under the moonlight. Ethereal wasn’t enough to describe him. The light bounced off his hair, reflecting a white shine that almost hurt to look at. He was in his normal outfit, including the blindfold. You were a bit disappointed, you wanted to see what his eyes looked like under the stars. 

“He just… why didn't he tell us?” Your voice sounds pathetic as you speak, but you aren’t ashamed. 

Gojo sighs and runs a hand through his hair. You watch the strands part for his fingers, and you can’t help but wish it was your palm. 

“I think he just didn’t know when to bring it up. It doesn’t really change anything, does it?” 

When he worded it like that, no, it didn’t. You still couldn’t shake the feeling of betrayal though. 

“I guess not, I just don’t understand.” 

“Suguru’s a good guy. He doesn’t have a malicious bone in his body. He never would have done it to hurt you.” 

The Suguru you knew didn’t seem like the type of person to go out of his way to hurt you. But after the events of yesterday, you weren’t even really sure you knew Suguru. Several days ago you thought he was just a normal guy, only to find out he was not only a sorcerer, but one of the strongest to have ever existed. 

Crickets chirp behind you, and you watch the city lights in front of you. You were at the bottom of the hill of the school, but it was still elevated enough where you could see most of Tokyo, the city lights shimmering beneath you. 

It really didn’t change anything, did it? Knowing the two of them were together didn’t affect how you felt about either of them. If anything, it did make things easier like Gojo said. They probably didn’t think you were stupid either, even though Gojo taunted you. As you think about it, your anger starts to dissipate. You aren’t even sure why you were so mad. Suguru definitely should have said something, but it wasn’t that big of a deal. And you definitely should’ve figured it out yourself. 

“You guys met a while ago, huh?” 

A soft grin breaks across Gojo’s face and you can feel the love radiating off of him. 

“We met in highschool. I was a dick back then. No one understood me. It was kind of hard, I wasn’t used to my curse technique yet so it was lonely.” Gojo takes a moment to think. “It was like I was the only one who could see color, and everyone around me couldn’t.”

You feel your chest tighten at his words. You had never seen him be so open before. 

Gojo lets out a quiet chuckle. 

“But here Suguru comes. And he can see. He can see all the red, blues, and yellows of the world. I didn’t think anyone else would be able to, but he proved that wrong.” 

You can see the affection pouring from his body. 

“And that’s how it was. It was just us two for awhile. The whole world was blind, but that didn’t matter because we could see.”

Gojo looks down at you and you feel exposed. You often felt that way whenever he looked at you. You weren’t sure if it was because of his technique or because he was Gojo, but whenever he looked at you you felt like he could see every secret, every emotion, and every thought you had. 

“Why don’t we get out of here? It’s late.” Gojo shuts the conversation down, but you’re positive he could keep talking about Suguru if you gave him the chance. 

“There’s still time left on my shift.” You look at your phone and see that there’s 15 minutes left. 

As it was so late, other students wouldn’t be replacing you. It was just going to be a handful of other sorcerers who had nothing better to do in the middle of the night.

“They don’t need to know.” Gojo offers a hand to you, and you take it. “Let’s go to my house. Suguru won’t be home and I can get us something to eat.” 

You think about it for a moment. It would be nice to have more alone time with Gojo. When you accept, you see a goofy grin on his face. 

~~~

When the two of you get to his apartment the lights are off. The atmosphere was different compared to yesterday when the three of you occupied the space. You follow behind Gojo and listen as he talks about his day, your eyes lingering around the space. 

It was neat, neater than you would have given him credit for. The inside wasn’t that colorful, but you noticed pops of reds and blues on the couch and on the artwork. It was weird to be inside Gojo’s house, it made him seem more normal. People treat him as if he’s a god, but seeing a glimpse into his life proved to you he wasn’t that much different compared to other people. He still had a living room with shitty decorations, just like everyone else. 

Gojo excuses himself to get changed into more comfortable clothes and you’re left sitting on the couch, the same one you sat on yesterday. Memories flood your mind from the previous night. The way they looked and how you felt next to them. It was stifling, and that wasn’t just because of the tension in the air. Being with the two of them made you nervous. You understood why people were afraid of them, not that you were. They were strong, dignified, and seeing them next to each other only made you realize how hot they truly were. Their differences complimented each other, lights and darks mixing into something tempting. 

Your eyes trail along the couch. It was comfortable and there was no doubt in your mind that Gojo spent a small fortune on it. This whole house probably cost more than you would see in your lifetime. 

“What do you want to drink?” Gojo calls, entering the kitchen. 

“Just water is fine.” 

“Boring.” You hear a crack of a soda can opening. 

Gojo comes back to you with a water bottle in his hand, and a can of soda in his other as he takes a sip from it. He’s wearing a loose shirt with old shorts, the fabric drowning out his normally mouth watering frame. He sits next to you, his knees knocking against yours. The situation feels entirely domestic, as if you always come home at night to sit with him.

“So, have you decided what you want to do yet?” 

You knew what he was talking about. Not much time had passed, but you were thinking about it. You did want to keep seeing them, Suguru included. You just needed to fix things with him first. 

“I want to keep seeing you guys, but I’m not sure if I can at the same time yet. You’re kind of overwhelming.” 

Gojo lets out a good natured laugh and agrees.

“We don’t all have to go out on dates together or have sex together until you’re ready.” 

Now why did he have to put that image in your brain? Thoughts of Gojo and Suguru above you started to cloud your mind, making your throat tighten. 

“I just need to get Suguru in my good graces again.” You murmur. 

“What, and I’m in your good graces?” Gojo asks incredulously. 

“For now. Who knows what you’ll get up to to piss me off.” You crack a smile. 

As you talk with him, you can’t help but think, why did they even want you in the first place? Gojo knew you from school, sure, but that didn’t mean you were special. And you were a complete stranger to Suguru. 

“Hey Gojo?” 

Gojo hums and turns his focus to you. 

“Earlier you said everyone else was blind compared to you and Suguru,” you take a deep breath “what if I’m blind too?” 

Gojo waits until you stop talking before he speaks. 

“I was a kid when I felt that way and an asshole. Although I’m not sure that part has changed. Suguru’s never felt like that. He’s always been good with people, well, he's usually good with people. You must make him nervous.” 

You feel your face heat up and you dart your eyes to the ground, wondering how you could make someone like Suguru nervous. 

“And I haven’t been flirting with you for this long without having my reasons. I like you. Suguru does too.” The revelation makes your chest tighten. It wasn’t a secret, but hearing it out loud made your heart race. 

The way he was talking was almost too sweet. 

When you turn your head to look at him again, you notice he’s more closer than before. His eyes are drawn to you, flicking over your face, and you can see that he’s thinking. Of what, you wonder. Gojo reaches out and plays with a piece of your hair and grins to himself. 

“Plus you’re hot too so that wins you brownie points.” 

You click your tongue and reach out to nudge his chest. He grabs your hand before you can make contact, and laces his fingers through yours. His hand is cold, his long fingers intertwining with yours. His infinity was off. You drag your eyes back up to his, neither of you looking away. The mood of the room shifts as you feel things start to fall into place. 

The two of you had been playing this game for a long time, and it was finally starting to catch up to you. Years of playful banter and stolen glances all leading up to this. 

His eyes drag to your lips where he notices you’re biting the bottom one, a look of desperation beginning to show in your eyes. 

“Suguru left you hanging yesterday, didn’t he?” 

“Mhm.” Your breathing starts to get heavy. 

Technically, he was the one who left you hanging. But you knew that he knew that. In Gojo’s defense, Suguru and you could have continued once you got home. You just didn’t. 

Gojo brings a thumb up to rest on your bottom lip, gently pulling down until your teeth pop off it, the saliva inside your mouth gleaming in the low light. You clench your other hand at your side, close to flying it up to grip him. You can smell the sickly sweet scent coming from his breath, the orange soda lingering on his tastebuds. 

“How mean of him.” Gojo coos at you before leaning in closer to you. 

He replaces his thumb with his lips, pressing his mouth against yours. Your brows furrow as you grip his shirt, holding him close to you as you kiss. This kiss felt so much better than the one at school. Gojo wraps a hand around your waist and lifts you up on his lap. Your hands comb through his white hair, enjoying the way the white strands feel in your fingers. You finally had Gojo all to yourself. There was no school, no curses, no Suguru. 

Just him, and you. 

Gojo nips your bottom lip before gliding his tongue along it, grinning at the noise you let out. Your lips part and his tongue instantly slides inside, tangling with yours. His hands grip your waist, pressing you tight against him. Your hips rock back and forth as you kiss him, a soft panting noise escaping from your throat. The room was burning up, but that doesn’t bother you. 

You can feel his cock start to harden beneath you as you grind against him. It catches on your core and you gasp, pulling your lips back. If Suguru was big, just how big would Gojo be? Gojo looks at you through heavy lids, grinding you against his cock. Your lips are slightly parted as you moan, pressing down harder. If only you could make Gojo as desperate as you were. 

You angle your hips slightly, winning a groan from him. It sounded good, once you heard it you decided you would do anything to hear him make that noise again. 

Gojo stands up and holds you in his arms, walking while he kisses you. He must know the layout of his house extremely well, because he doesn’t open his eyes once. When you do you notice you’re in a bedroom. 

The bed behind you is large but you don’t have time to appreciate it before Gojo is setting you down and hovering over you. There’s a cocky grin on his face and instead of annoying you, it sends a shiver down your spine. 

He looked like he was going to ruin you. 

You reach a hand up and cup his cheek, running your thumb along the smooth skin of his face. He looks startled for a moment before his expression relaxes again, letting you continue to touch him. 

You were touching Gojo. It was a luxury many couldn’t say they had experienced, and most that had touched him, didn’t live to tell the tale. 

Pushing his hair back, you pull him down and press your lips against his. His body grinds against yours as your tongues collide, a symphony built on your moans filling the room. 

Gojo pulls away to start kissing down your neck, his long fingers sliding up your shirt to roam against the skin of your stomach. You arch up into him, holding his shirt tightly, as if that will bring you down to earth. 

He sits up to pull your shirt over the top of your head, throwing it to the side. His eyes rake down your figure and you’ve suddenly never felt so bare before. 

Somehow it felt like you were going too fast, but not fast enough. You had been waiting to do this ever since you locked eyes with him all those years ago. 

Gojo hums and drags his finger along your neck, tracing the sensitive marks that marred your flesh. 

“Wow, Suguru really did a number on you, didn’t he?” He mumbles under his breath before leaning down again, kissing the same spots that Suguru bit into. 

It steals your breath away, the ceiling above you spinning as you feel yourself leak between your legs. Gojo brings his lips down slowly, pressing kisses down your skin as he reaches your chest. His hands roam your body, your skin tingling with each centimeter he covers. 

You’ve noticed two things about Gojo tonight. One, he was sexy. You always knew he was attractive, but he used to just be something that was beautiful and unattainable, like a wild animal. But he was yours tonight, and he was so fucking sexy. Two, being with him felt like you were at the beach. 

No, that wasn’t right. 

Being with him felt like you were wading through the waves of the ocean, the unruly water flicking against your skin. It felt good, but in the blink of an eye it was all consuming, pulling you under only to give you more, more, more. It was getting harder to breathe around Gojo, he was all consuming, his presence demanded your attention. Even though it felt like you were drowning, you decided to let yourself sink. 

Gojo’s large hands slide beneath your body, unclasping your bra before pulling it off. There’s fire under your skin as you watch his eyes trail over your figure. Your nipples are hard under his gaze, the pressure of the situation catching up to you. Gojo brings a thumb up and glides it against one nipple, grinning once you shiver. 

“Sensitive, are we?” 

Your face fills with heat at the taunt. Gojo lowers himself to your breasts, his face even with one of them. His mouth opens as his tongue flicks out, dragging across your nipple. You groan and throw your head back, letting the sensation over take you. His lips wrap around you, the warmth of his mouth making your skin break out in goosebumps. He gently sucks, his tongue rubbing back and forth. Gojo lightly bites your nipple, a dull sensation flooding through your body before he lets go to lick the area again. 

If you had any sense of self preservation, you would be mortified at the noises you were letting out. 

But you didn’t. 

Instead, your body twists and turns underneath him, moans floating from your lips. Gojo brings up his thumb to your face, sliding along your bottom lip before slipping inside your mouth. You graciously accept it, using one hand to hold him steady. You suck his thumb, your tongue running along the side of it. You’re grateful to have something else to focus on besides the near painful throbbing that was happening between your legs. You let him rest the pad on your tongue, sucking it into your mouth. 

Gojo pulls his thumb from your lips and brings it to your chest, letting the saliva coat your other nipple. Your face pinches up at the sensation, his thumb smoothing back and forth over you. 

Gojo leans up again, his face ever so slightly tinted with need. He moves down to press kisses to your stomach before he reaches your pants. There was only two more pieces of clothing protecting you, the realization that you would soon be completely bare makes your throat tighten. His fingers linger on your waist to give you an opportunity to stop, before he finally tugs both garments down. A rush of cold air brushes against you. You felt helpless under his gaze, completely at his disposal. 

You wanted this, god you wanted this. 

His fingers glide down your thighs, pulling your legs open with a strength that borderlined on elegance. Bright blue eyes look at your core, the way he looked at you was ravenous. Just like a wild animal. Gojo slides down until his head is between your thighs, and you realize just how good he looks there. Almost as if he was meant to be there. 

“You don’t know how long I’ve been dreaming about this.” His voice is low and raspy, and he darts his eyes up to your face and then back down. 

Years, maybe. You had known him for quite some time, and the two of you had teased each other for most of it. You always erred on the side of respect while he constantly pushed the line, seeing what he could get away with. And just like how he admitted he was dreaming of it, you were too. Knowing Suguru didn’t care set your mind at ease. It felt surreal. 

Gojo sticks his tongue out and lines it up with your pussy, sliding through your folds slowly. A moan escapes your throat. 

“G-gojo-“ you groan. 

He stops to speak. 

“Call me Satoru.” 

You whimper below him as he drags his tongue through you again, flicking against your clit. 

“Satoru-“ 

When you say his name it’s as if you’re letting him loose. His face dives in, his lips wrapping around your clit. Your fists grip the sheets below you, your legs shaking around his head. The change in pace was making your head spin. He keeps his lips wrapped around you while his tongue massages your clit. You can feel your pussy drool, already responsive to the way Satoru touched your body. 

You wanted to tell him how good it felt, how you felt insane as he pleasured you, how you’ve needed him for all this time and more. 

But you can’t. 

You groan as he glides his tongue around. You were certain that anything you could bring yourself to say would be intelligible. Satoru pulls away to seemingly give you a moment of reprieve. Just as you’re catching your breath, he’s pursing his lips and blowing on your core. Your legs try to close but he keeps them open, a smile showing on his face. 

“So fucking cute,” he coos at you. 

Satoru slides down, sticking his tongue out again. 

“Can’t believe you made me wait all this time to taste you- fuck, I don’t think I’ll ever get enough.” He speaks before he presses his tongue against your hole.

The warmth of it spreads across you from the inside out. He presses inside you before sliding out, tongue fucking you. You’re moaning as you look down to watch him, to watch the strongest sorcerer metaphorically on his knees for you. 

Your clit feels neglected as he moves his tongue around. 

“P-please Satoru.” You beg, your voice wavering. 

He pulls away to wait for you to speak. 

“What is it baby? What do you need?” 

Fuck him. He knows what you need. Satoru’s always been a tease, it only made sense for him to be the same in bed. 

You aren’t quite sure how Suguru does it. 

“Make me feel good.” Your mind is melted as you ask him. 

“Am I not already making you feel good? Because I would beg to differ.”

“Satoru m-make me cum.” You plead. 

Something flashes in his eyes before he’s covering you with his mouth again. His tongue goes straight for your clit, circling it as you thrash below him. His strong arms hold you down as he licks you. With the noises he was making below you, you would think he was the one getting touched. 

Your moans increase in volume as he refuses to relent, again going back to sucking your clit. You could hardly focus with the way he touched you. Satoru continues until you’re moaning his name. You know you’re close, he must know it too. His eyes flutter closed as he continues. Your body jerks underneath him, and your hands fly up to clutch his hair. 

“Satoru- I’m gonna,” you moan. 

Seconds later you burst on his tongue, cumming as he refuses to stop. He licks up everything you give him until you’re squirming away, pushing his head. 

When you look down, you see that he looks crazed as he pulls away. His lips are covered in your release, his cheeks tinted a dark pink as he drags his tongue on his lips. 

Your body is still settling down as he leans over, pressing a kiss against you again. It’s softer this time, and when he pulls away he looks much more composed. 

His eyes flick up towards the clock on his bedside table before he brings them back down to look at you. 

“Satoru, aren’t we going to,” you aren’t sure how to finish that sentence. You were embarrassed to ask if you were going to have sex even though his tongue was on you moments ago. 

“I’d love to, you know I would. But it’s late. If we start now, I don’t plan on stopping for a very long time. Either we start now and we both call out of work tomorrow, or we stop for now.” 

You really didn’t want to stop. But you also didn’t want to miss work tomorrow. There would always be more chances to have sex with him, but you wanted to do it now. 

“And you?” You ask, dragging your eyes to the bulge in his pants. 

Satoru waves, unbothered by the implication. 

“Suguru gets me riled up all the time and stops to piss me off, I’ll be fine.” 

You feel as the room starts to cool down again. 

That was probably the best orgasm of your life. 

“However,” Satoru leans down close to your face, “just remember next time we start, I’m not going to stop.” 

Lead is in your stomach as you nod. He smiles and pulls away again, walking over towards his drawers. He’s digging around before he comes back holding one of his shirts and pants. 

“Wear these for the night. It’s too late and I get needy after sex.” You chuckle at the admission and take the clothes, sliding them over your form. 

You drown in them, but it’s nice. It smells like a mixture between the two men. You could smell it forever. 

Satoru flops on the bed and wraps his arms around you, bringing you in close. He was needy, and you didn’t even really have sex. 

Sleeping with Satoru was easy. The lack of personal space was just what you needed to get a good nights rest. Your eyes flutter open once you see the sun start to peak through his blinds. The previous night felt like a dream, but you were positive it wasn’t. You were still wearing his clothes and he was still wrapped around your body. Satoru’s eyes are closed but you have a sneaking suspicion he’s awake. You pinch his shoulder and laugh at the face he makes. 

“Can’t sleep forever.” You tease. 

“Why not?” 

You turn to look at the clock. You had a bit of time before you would have to go to school, but you didn’t want to allow yourself to break under the temptation of getting comfortable again. 

Satoru sits up first and it seems as though he’s been awake for sometime now, the lack of sleepiness evident on his features. He must be an early bird. He stands up and you follow after him. 

You skimp around and find your discarded clothes from the previous night. They were slightly crumpled, not anything extremely noticeable. If you were lucky, no one would notice they were the clothes from yesterday. You shake your shoulders before shedding the man’s clothes, switching them with yours. Satoru’s waiting outside the bedroom with breakfast. It was cereal and toast, simple but it suited him. 

“Sorry if it’s a shitty breakfast, Suguru’s always the one to cook. Whenever he leaves I basically wither away and starve.” He says as he bites into a piece of toast. 

“Aw, you poor baby.” You respond and sit next to him, pouring a bowl of the sugary cereal. 

“I’m glad you noticed.” 

You open your mouth to speak before you snap it closed. You wanted to ask where Suguru was. You didn’t want to seem needy, he still wasn’t in the clear yet. Even if you were mad, you missed him. 

“He’s gonna be back later today.” Satoru answers you before you even ask. 

You talk over your poor man’s breakfast before you head off to the school, the full day ahead of you. 

When your feet hit the school grounds, something feels different. You aren’t sure what it is. Satoru seems to notice too. There isn’t anything wrong per se, but it doesn’t feel like it normally does. When you find the principle, part of you feels relieved. Maybe he could tell you what was going on. 

“Oh, there you two are. You’re late.” He says. 

Satoru usually was late. You, however, weren’t. 

“What can I say, I’m a bad influence.” 

Yaga ignores him before he speaks. 

“There was another attack close to the school last night.” 

What? 

Your eyes flick to Satoru but it’s impossible to tell if he’s looking at you, he put his blindfold on once you entered the room. 

“It was a little after 1 A.M around the shift change, and it was seemingly closer than it’s been before.” 

After 1, what were you doing after 1? 

You knew exactly what you were doing after 1. It involved a certain someone in the same room as you. 

“W-what happened?” You prod. 

“Not much, at least nothing big compared to previous attacks. They just burned down a couple of trees. It’s a bit weird.” 

“It’s like they’re taunting us.” Satoru says. 

The realization curdles in your stomach. They were getting closer and they could have done something drastic, but they didn’t. Why didn’t they? 

Your body shifts as Yaga talks. You feel a wave of guilt crash over you. It happened last night, when you were responsible, when you left early. There was a chance you could have stopped it. 

“I think I’m going to employ a little more help. It’s not realistic to have sorcerers there 24/7, so I’m going to use some of my cursed corpses to guard it. They aren’t enough to stop the group, probably, but they’ll be enough to at the very least alert someone who can stop it.” 

Not a bad idea. 

Your teeth dig in your cheek as Yaga excuses himself. Satoru steps in front of you and grabs your arm. 

“What’s wrong?” He asks. 

“I could have stopped it. I left early.” 

“It probably happened right after your shift was going to end anyway. The other group taking over after you probably just arrived late. The attacks have never happened this late before so you had no reason to believe anything was going to happen.” 

His words make you feel a little better, but you still find yourself deflating at the realization. 

No matter how bad you were feeling, you knew you would have to get over it, at least for the day. You had things to do, and your students needed you. 

“You good?” 

“Yeah, I’m good, let’s go.” 

The both of you depart, going to your classrooms. 

Tag List: @tojislittleprincesss, @dinolvrrr, @kimi01985, @constawrites, @spookysoowpprince, @reosnagi, @faerie-soirxx, @platrom, @oownowonwoo, @megumisdivinedogs

If you want to be added to the taglist please let me know, just specify what you want to be tagged in like this fic or all my works

#my writing #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #satoru x reader #gojo x you #gojo satoru x you #satoru x you #suguru x reader #suguru geto x reader #geto x reader #suguru x you #suguru geto x you #geto x you #suguru x reader x gojo #poly satosugu #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen #jjk

[tuliptic]

Messages From The Divine

This Pick a Card/Pile is for you and me to hear the messages from the divine. Who wants to talk to you? What are the messages they bring?

Close your eyes, meditate on this topic and ask yourself the question. Breathe in and out, make sure your mind and heart is calm. Then, open your eyes to see which pile talks to you the most/draws you in the most. Once you’ve found your pile, scroll down to the respective parts to see what are the messages for you.

Piles go from left to right.

Disclaimer: This is solely for my entertainment purposes. Take only whatever you feel like it. If it doesn’t resonate, it means I’m not the reader for you and it’s okay to just drop it. Besides, I do not consent to my work or images being used by third partis on this platform or other websites as well.

Decks used: Luna Cat Tarot Deck (Major Arcana), Linestrider Tarot Deck, Sweet Dreams Oracle Deck, Starcodes Astro Oracle Deck

Pile 1

Message from the goddess Selene

My dear… -sighs- You’re strong, you’ve fought so hard for everything to be in place, you’ve fought for the world to be in your hands. What does that feel like? You realized that achievement isn’t everything, correct? You realized that you needed more strength to face more things that you used to love, right? I’m not saying you're wrong, I’m just… I just want you to be happier, to be more at peace with yourself.

You are starting a lot of new projects and you’re slowly draining yourself out. I’m worried about you. Starting one or two is still alright, but the more you start, the more you have to see through it until the end, and that’s slowly eating you up. What started as fun is starting to become a burden, a responsibility you’ll need to bear. Success will be coming your way, but please do not let it lose your sense of fun, please do not let it lose your sense of self.

-Sighs again- I see that you’ll be very busy from now on, with how many projects you’re having with you, and that things are going to be moving at a very fast pace, probably faster than you can catch up. When this happens, know that I’m here for you along with your higher self, and we’ll be communicating with you in your dreams to help you with whatever life has for you. You are divinely protected, especially by me. And as much as changes come, you just… Embrace them, no matter how fast they are, and you adapt.

As much as I worry for you, you seem pretty excited with all these movements. I believe they come as a pivotal change for you to transition into a new phase, into a new you. I am happy for you but I can’t stop worrying about how much you’re starting to put on you. Please remember to take care of yourself, alright? I’ll be here for you all the time, even when you can’t see me. Just look up in the night sky and tell me your happiness, your fears, your success, your worries. I’m listening. I’m here for you as your greatest supporter.

Pile 2

Message from the goddess Athena

How does it feel like? To finally regain the balance that you’ve always wanted? To finally accept the changes that came your way and make peace with it? You had so much fear, but you still managed to do it. Spectacularly, I’d say. You did a great job and I’m so, so proud of you for getting through those hard times.

Betrayals are such painful things to deal with, especially when it’s people you trust the most being sneaky and backstabbing you. However, fear not, my child. There’s always an end to a tunnel. Trust the process and keep running. Don’t let past disappointments stop you from having hope in this world. Continue giving, and you shall receive. Balance is what keeps the world moving, what keeps the world in a harmonious state. You give, and you shall receive. Even if it’s not now, it will, eventually. Believe that good karma will come back to you when you’re generous with what you have, including time and love.

You should also take some time for yourself, my child. Spend some time with me, meditate and think about where you want to go, what you want to achieve, what you want to let go, who you want to spend your energy on. It is a new phase, a new chance for your own growth, for you to challenge yourself to step outside of your comfort zone as you head towards illumination. You are a warrior, my child. You know that you’re the co-creator of your life and destiny, and you’re ready to take matters into your hands.

Whenever you feel tired or you need help, come to me. If you’re willing to receive help from me and the Universe, help shall fall upon you. Believe. Trust. Love. Live life to the fullest. I am with you.

Pile 3

Message from the goddess Demeter

My dear child, I’d love to give you a huge hug. Whatever time of perils shall be over soon. Fate is now smiling at you, and the Sun is coming out to give you a warm hug. Do not fear the Sun, for it gives out light and heat to the world, for it gives warmth to the soul. The Sun is always there for you, let its rays kiss your forehead and remind you that you are very much loved.

Whatever painful times, whatever heart-stabbing moments are coming to an end. The swords are falling out and you can finally let yourself be healed. Stop treating your pain like it’s something you imagined. If you see the wound is real, then you can heal it. Be kind to your wounds, spend time and tend to them gently. My dear, I know you tend to have an overly rational approach to your day to day problems, and over-rationalize a lot of things. But my lovely child, reason itself isn’t the answer to everything. Let yourself and your emotions run. Accept that it’s alright to be unreasonable, that it’s already a time for you to let yourself loose. 

It may be very difficult right now, but trust that whatever that’s happening to you right now is intending to build you up to face the future stronger. You’ve been creating strong emotional connections with the important people in your life, haven’t you? Those people, they are here for you. They are always with you, physically or emotionally, and they are determined to bring you to wonderful places that are filled with wonder, delight and joy. 

My beloved child, your family may have disappointed you at times, but you have to remember you’re never a disappointment in my eyes, in the eyes of the people who love you unconditionally. I’m here to nurture you, to bring you to a place where warmth and light resides, to let you be able to release that warmth and light to the people you care for as well. I’m here for you, always, and forever.

Thank you for reading until the end! Feedbacks and reblogs are always appreciated! <3

#tuliptic #🌷 #pick a card #pick a pile #tarot reading #tarot #tarot reader #tarot readings #idk what to tag anymore #this is one that i had fun doing #and it was relatively easy and natural for me to do them #i feel like.... message channelling may really be my thing #idk #but eh #i had fun doing this #i hope yall have fun reading it too

[all-risejd]

A New Judgment Chapter 2: Two Offers and a Smack (Poly Judgment Day Fic)

Written by Scarletxraine who can’t seem to remember to post to this godforsaken hellsite so has me post here for your enjoyment!

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3. Part 4. Part 5. Part 6. Part 7.

The men of the Judgement Day share a confused look. "Well, that makes things more interesting." Damien comments once Triple H and Nessa were gone.

"Dom, did you know she was going to be here?" Finn asks, stepping over to Dominik and helping him off the exam bed. Dominik doesn't answer, just looks down at his hand that is clasping the bracelet.

"Dom are you ok man?" Damien asks, starting to worry about his young partner. "Hey what's going on in your head..." He messes with Dominik's hair.

"I gave her this on our anniversary last year. It was tantamount to a proposal how much it meant that I gave it to her." "What do you mean? You broke off an engagement to join us?" Finn asks confused and ready to slap the young man upside the head.

"Not exactly. My grandmother wanted me to give it to the woman I wanted to marry, it wasn't a proposal but more of an intent to propose," He explains "Ow! What the fuck man!" His hand goes to his head that Finn just slapped.

"She seems damn near perfect why would you leave her? You know you could have just joined us as a teammate and not romantic partner, or you both could have joined as our partners?" Damien chides.

"My dad got in my head talking about how mom suffered, and I remembered him never being there for major moments but bringing me in for shock factor when it suited him. I was never around, and I didn't want her to suffer like that and have to see a story of me and someone else. I ended it to protect her, she deserves better than what I can give. Plus, I don't know if she would be ok with that. She gets jealous and territorial." Dominik shrugs.

"Let me get this right," Finn starts and takes a breath, "The girl you apparently wanted to marry and still apparently want to, who is in healthcare like your mum and understands and supports you unconditionally... You break up with her to protect her feelings and in the process break her heart and she still loves and supports you." Finn slaps him upside the head again. "You are a fucking idiot you know that Dom, you fucked up big time."

"Yeah, and I want to fix it at least be friends with her. I want her in my life as selfish as that sounds..." Dominik looks at his partners like a kicked puppy.

"Well, we were texting Mami and agreed that if she wants to join our relationship, she can, we just have to negotiate. If that is something you want of course it has to be a unanimous decision. Or you can get with her again and we all just remain friends too." Damien offers knowing what Dominik's answer will be.

"I don't want to leave you guys either, I don't know." Dom almost whines.

"Well going off her response when we told her she seems receptive enough to maybe broach the subject if you make things right with her." Finn analyzes the conversation from earlier as they head to their locker room.

"We can help, you are not in this alone." Damien offers and Dominik smiles and nods in agreement.

"Right so here is what we will do..." Finn starts.

Nessa and Triple H only walk for a few minutes until they reach his office. He holds the door open for her and holds out a chair for her before he goes and sits behind his desk. A thick stack of papers conspicuously sitting in front of him. "Without realizing it you cut some excellent promos. You made people conflicted about the match and got people on your side." He explains and shows her tweets of people supporting her and the hashtag #justicefornessa trending.

"To be honest I didn't even want to come but Mr. Gutierrez insisted, begged even and to be honest I am hurt about why he did it." Nessa eyes the stack of papers.

"To be honest with you I knew he was bringing you and he worked some things out. He wants to help his son and you. Even with the betrayal he still loves him. He didn't mean to hurt you or really manipulate him." He looks at her sympathetic. "Rey wants to help Dominik, in both his personal life and his career and he asked me to give you a job. It was brought to my attention that you applied to be part of our medical not long after Dominik joined the company. I would like to extend a formal offer. It would be a dual contract. Less than normal talent but more than traditional medical and probably more than you make now." He smiles proud that they came up with this plan.

Nessa looks confused but not surprised, "What do you mean sir?"

"You are a nurse, right?" He asks.

"Yeah, a charge nurse on the Peds Unit."

"Well, we want you to be part of our medical team of doctors and nurses that travel alongside the talent and shows both taped and un-taped. And to be a talent, part of the story and potentially getting physically involved with a potential of matches in the future if both parties agree." He explains and she is intrigued.

"I can't just up and leave my job, I'm under contract and don't want to risk the children's lives." She explains.

"We can buy out your contract, we contacted the facility where you work to put a plan in place only if you agree so there is coverage on short notice." He doesn't even look sheepish.

"So, you and Rey planned this? Why?" She levels a soft glare at him.

"Rey thinks you both can get closure or back together if you had a chance to talk and wants to make sure both of you are happy and taken care of as I said, even though Dom has a grudge against his dad at the moment. Made the story that much easier since it is true." He gives a sheepish smile.

"I can't make any promises, but I'll look over the contract and have my lawyer do the same. When would you like an answer by?" Is her response as she holds out her hands for the stack of papers.

"We would like an answer by Wednesday so we can bring you on at Smackdown and get you some training, which you will continue with your team and an assigned trainer, and safety tests if you are ok getting physical." He answers leaning back in his chair.

"You also have some control over what direction your story goes with them, we are thinking a triangle between you Dom, and Rhea or a "relationship" between you and Damien going by how you two reacted to each other after the match." He adds on.

"What about their true dynamic?" She asks trying.

"We are unsure about unveiling that to the public, they barely accept LGBTQ people and subtext, we don't know how they would handle that." He shrugs, at least honest.

"It would be an interesting thing to explore and explains their dynamic better." She offers and thinking more to herself.

"That is true and something we might explore if the opportunity presents itself. I do hope you decide to join us, Miss Klein." He stands up offering his hand to shake again.

"Thank you for the offer, sir, and please call me Nessa." She gets up and shakes his hand.

"Then call me Paul," He answers, adding, "I look forward to your answer either way Wednesday." He gestures to the door his assistant standing there.

"Rhea wanted to see me, could I go talk to her before I leave?" She stops at the door and asks.

"Yeah, Heather, please show her where Rhea is." He orders, and Heather nods and leads the way. Once there she knocks on the pole before pulling the curtain aside revealing Rhea stretching. She sees Nessa enter and walks over, placing her arm around Nessa's shoulders.

"Finally, I was beginning to think you left mini-me."

"I was going to. Just because I am happy, he has you doesn't mean I want to see it." She shrugs out of Rhea's arm not wanting to be caught in a compromising position in case anyone comes in.

"What's that you got there luv?" Rhea gestures to the stack of papers in Nessa's hand. Nessa looks down and hugs it to her chest.

"Oh, uh nothing to worry about. You wanted to talk to me?"

"Yes doll, come sit let's talk before the boys join us and I have to go to my match." Rhea gestures to the couch. "I wanted to make sure to tell you Dominik never cheated on you. He started as just a wrestling partner. He didn't join our romantic dynamic until weeks after he left you. We even gave him the option of bringing you in on the dynamic if you consented. I don't want you to think he cheated on you." Rhea explains and puts a comforting hand on Nessa's thigh, an intimate gesture she doesn't shake off.

"I don't think that, I figured it was something like that. I don't hold it against you as long as he is happy and safe, I'm happy for him." Nessa places her hand on Rheas and squeezes it before continuing.

"That just means he doesn't want to be with me, that I wasn't enough, which hurts more and makes me wonder what is wrong with me." Nessa word-vomits, and Rhea looks dismayed and places her hand on Nessa's cheek gently directing her to meet her gaze.

"Hey no, stop that. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. From what I've seen and heard from Dom you are an angel. I'm sure there was a reason in his idiot mind, you know how men are never thinking through their decisions until after. Did he even ask you about the dynamic before leaving you?" Rhea consoles, rubbing Nessa's back. Nessa shakes her head no, trying to keep from crying.

"I don't know why I'm spilling all this to you, and now I've been offered a job to add to the drama and join the medical team and I don't know what to do..." Nessa sniffles.

"Well sweetheart you preach about wanting Dom Dom to be happy, but what about you? You need to do what makes you happy too. Now it looks like you need a hug." Rhea advises and stands up holding her arms out for a hug. Nessa gets up and hugs her finding a strong sense of comfort in Rhea's arms her eyes closed.

She processes the conversation, and her eyes fly open and steps back from Rhea. "Wait you said something about me joining your relationship?!"

Rhea looks sheepish and nervous and glances at the ground. "Well yeah, if that is something you would like we are open to the idea." She answers.

Nessa stands shocked, unsure how to answer when the boys fling open the curtain and walk in, stopping in their tracks when they see Nessa.

"Hey Mamita, you are still here?" Damien exclaims throwing his arm over her shoulder which shocks her out of her thoughts.

"Uh yeah, Rhea wanted to talk to me."

"Oh yeah when we're alone you can call me Demi," Rhea smiles kindly trying to not make it weirder.

"I'm Luis if you didn't know." Damien gives her a half hug before plopping on the couch.

"You can still call me Finn." Finn chimes in and Dominik is having a staring contest with the ground. Finn and Damien share a look and smile seeing the stack of papers in Nessa's hand.

"Demi, thank you for your honesty and being so kind, I really appreciate it. I value honesty a lot." Nessa smiles a real smile at her and goes over and gives her one more hug to show she doesn't feel weird about the conversation. "It is a lot to process, maybe we'll talk later. Get my number from Dominik if he still remembers it." Nessa adds, throwing a dig at Dom who won't meet her eyes and mumbles sorry under his breath. Finn snickers and nudges the young man.

"Can we all get your number mariposa?" Damien asks winking at Nessa who can't control the blush that creeps up her face as she nods her head. Rhea tries to hide her smile and ends up smirking.

Nessa clears her throat. "Uh could someone show me the way out, I have to work tomorrow morning and want to go to bed. I've had enough excitement for tonight." She asks, and Dominik looks up for the first time.

"Yeah, reinita I'll show you." He steps towards her, but Damien stops him after seeing Nessa's expression.

"You just had a rough match, you need to rest. I'll show mamita out." Damien offers holding out his elbow and Nessa takes it mouthing thanks.

"Hey, I hope we see you again soon!" Finn waves goodbye and Nessa smiles back at him as she walks out of the room with Damien who makes conversation.

"So mamita, I need to ask how do you feel about what you learned today. Are you ok? He pats her hand that is still resting on her elbow.

"Honestly yes, I myself am more flexible with my sexuality, I am proudly pansexual and have no issue with the thought of polyamory. It is more so the fact I am jealous by nature and don't know how I myself could handle it so I am not sure it is for me." She answers honestly but doesn't add on what she was thinking that she is open to try.

"I'm glad you are handling this well, you say you are jealous by nature, but I see no jealousy or being territorial from you regarding Dom."

"Because it has been months and I have begun to accept that he doesn't want to be with me, and as I have said multiple times, I just want him happy I just wish I could be the one to do it." She smiles sadly as they reach the exit door for talent.

"Hey, you made him happy it wasn't your fault he did what he did. I think he freaked out and made a mistake and doesn't know how to fix it. Hopefully, I see you around mamita." He opens the door for her, and she rolls her eyes because she knows what he has been calling her all night.

"That's not my name!" She calls out smiling as she walks out the door, the contract clutched tightly in her hands.

#judgment day x reader #the judgment day fanfic #rhea ripley x reader #finn balor x reader #dominik mysterio x reader #damian priest x reader

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

When watching people play The Stanley Parable, I always thought it be really cool if in the middle of it the Narrator was interrupted by a door opening and someone saying something like “hey how’s the game going? Have you eaten something yet?” And the Narrator getting flustered and apologizing to Stanley that they need to take a break and eat dinner. If it’s ok with you can you write something with this idea? (If you aren’t too overwhelmed with ask of course)

"You, too?! Unbelievable. I'm at the mercy of an entire species of invalids.." Scratching his head in annoyance, Narrator could only watch as Stanley went right back into the broom closet with no intentions of leaving.

This felt like a betrayal of sorts.

Was this some kind of joke? What was so special about this closet? Did he only stay in here for extra dialogue? Or to uncover some hidden secret?!

He couldn't understand his motivations. And trying to force himself to understand was starting to make his headache come back. It's been gnawing at his brain all day long, yet he elected to ignore it.

The story had to go on!

"Perhaps there's a monkey nearby you can hand the controls to? A fish? A fungus?” He sighed tiredly. “Look..you can-"

Suddenly he heard a door creak open. Not the broom closet within the game, but within his own realm, causing him to swivel around to see you there.

"Hey, Narry. How’s the game going?”

“[Y/n]! I told you not to--!!!”

“Have you eaten anything today?”

But before he could chastise you for interrupting, he thought about your question and realized...no, he doesn’t recall eating anything today. Of course, he’d have tea and coffee to keep himself awake, though actual sustenance? An actual meal??

He forgets that he needed those a lot more than he’d like to admit. Maybe that’s why he was letting this broom closet nonsense get to him so much.

“...as a matter of fact, I-I don’t believe so.” A bit flustered, and sensing Stanley’s confusion, he turned back to his desk and adjusted his mic. “You’ll have to excuse me for a moment, Stanley. My partner calls. So while I’m taking a much needed break, feel free to write me a 10-page essay on what exactly this godforsaken closet means to you and maybe..just maybe I’ll get a better understanding of your perspective.” 

After muting himself, Narrator took off his headset and put it down, sighing heavily as he saw you coming over. He clearly looked tired, which made you pout a little. You didn’t like seeing him ignore basic needs for the sake of his story. He often forgot he was an actual person.

“You don’t have to look so deeply into things.” You hugged him. “Maybe he just likes closets.”

“But I can’t help it when he goes off-script..” He grumbled into your chest. “I'm just trying to understand why. I need to. Is he expecting something to just magically happen?! You think I should board it up next time-?”

“Shh, you’re getting worked up again. We’ll talk about it over dinner, okay?” You gently cut him off, pulling away so he can get out of his chair. “You can’t expect yourself to write on an empty stomach.”

“You made us dinner?” He blinked, a soft smile gracing his lips soon after. “Oh, [y/n]. You’re too good to me. Perhaps that’s why this broom closet situation has me more irritable than normal. I’m simply famished.”

You just chuckled and took his hands. “You and your fancy words. C’mon. Before it gets cold.”

#clanask #anonymous #the stanley parable x reader #stanley parable x reader #tsp x reader #tsp narrator x reader #narrator x reader #domestic fluff

[little-peril-stories]

LPS: Blog (Re)Intro

Little Peril Stories | Kate | adult | she/her

Masterlists:

The Queen of Lies (ongoing): AU for The Prince of Thieves—sheltered, rich sad girl meets snarky criminal; chaos ensues; whumpy, Victorian forbidden love vibes with a side helping of angst and girl power

The Court of Rogues (work in progress): sequel to The Prince of Thieves; details to come 2024.

The Prince of Thieves (complete): guy and gal get arrested and tormented by super cool, totally normal constable while pals on the outside freak out and make bad decisions; fun 1800s prison vibes with a side helping of angst and chosen family

Blood Garnet (side WIP, low priority): girl gets lost in magic woods and gets chased by her hapless cousin and a grump hunter; awkward magic man tries to help; supernatural(ish) romantasy vibes with a side helping of angst and betrayal

Man of Letters (UNRESOLVED; part of Whumptober 2023): awkward scholar boi tries to save the girl he falls in love with and gets way more than he bargained for; light romantasy paired with heavy emo vibes, with a side of helping of angst and torture

Fen and Freddie (complete): gal gets kidnapped, dopey cinnamon roll with hopeless crush tries to rescue her and fails; vague superhero sci-fi vibes with a side helping of angst and pining

The Curiosity Collector (complete): sweet non-confrontational magic boy gets kidnapped and needs rescuing by bf and sis; witchy, autumnal vibes with a side helping of angst and falling in love

✨ Check out: OC & WIP extras (mood boards, lyrics inspo, tag game creations, and more!)

This is a whumpblr/writeblr space! Sometimes I’ll post/reblog writerly posts, memes, etc., but a lot of the posts/RBs will be about whump. I post original writing and reblog the work of others that I enjoy, gifs, tropes, prompts, and other such things.

I’m down with asks and tag games but may not respond right away. If I seem to ignore you, it’s not personal, it just means real life is taking priority at that moment.

I love comments and feedback on my writing and welcome them with open arms.

A note on age: I know I can’t actually stop you from accessing this blog, but I do not wish to interact with people under 18. It’s not personal, I’m sure you’re great, but it has everything to do with my job IRL. Please respect this boundary and come back on your 18th birthday.

Check out: My Most Common Tropes

My favourite elements of whump have to do with power dynamics, intimidation, dread, and angst. I love captivity-with-a-cause: kidnapping for ransom or as leverage over someone else, prison (in fantasy or historical settings, less so for modern settings though it’s not a hard rule), and the like. Fantasy presents so many creative versions of this trope, so I do love me some fantasy whump! It also gives lots of opportunity for dungeons, shackles, and other fun implements like that. Gratuitous tying or chaining up is always delightful to see. Pining, desperately trying to protect a loved one (…and failing), and self-sacrifice are other big tropes I love, so expect to see lots of those!

As for characters, I love it when they are as far as you can get from perfect, pure, and innocent—when they’re good enough people, but whose flawed or maybe even problematic decisions lead them into trouble. Always, always, I want my characters to have a hand in their own fates. Pure-hearted victims of the narrative who simply fall into a whumpy situation are cute and fun, but not what I tend to write.

A few odds and ends I’m such a sucker for, so you’ll probably find them in my writing:

Sibling relationships

Allusions to songs, books, folklore, and musicals

Nature and weather helping to set the scene (oh my goodness, how many times can I work snow into one story?)

If romance, either slow burn or instant attraction

…with a sprinkling of “huh, I don’t understand what I’m feeling, wtf is going on??”

‘In the nick of time’ rescues

Painfully awkward moments

Fluff and comfort, but only once they’ve really earned it

Almost kisses

Hard choices

Happy endings

You probably won’t find much gore or explicit noncon here, but there might be some elements of those in my stories or in reblogs. I don’t write BBU or pet whump.

My original “whumpy things I like” post can be found here.

Anyway, thanks for reading! 💕 Happy whumping!

#blog intro #whump intro #writeblr intro #this is a reintroduction #whump community #writeblr #whumpblr #pinned post

[aristrocrat]

Upside Down Feelings 2

Chapter Ten: The End of the Eddie Era

summary: the aftermath of Eddie seeing Y/N and Steve dancing together at the Winter Ball

word count: 1650 :,(

TW: THIS IS SO FUCKING SAD I’M SO SORRY!! MY DAY IS RUINED..

“Oh shit,” You muttered, pulling away from Steve as you watched Eddie spin on his heels and leave. Steve followed your eyes, catching sight of the familiar curly haired mane making its exit. His lips part with guilt as he saw you run towards the now closing doors. “Eddie! Eddie! Jesus, could you just wait up?”

The boy continued to quicken his pace to his van, ignoring your calls and pleas. You managed to catch up just in time to put your hand on the driver’s door, preventing him from opening it.

“Can you just listen to me for a moment?” You breathed, feeling your heart break more with every second that he avoided looking into your eyes. “It was just a slow dance, alright? I need you to trust-“

“Trust?” He chuckled bitterly as his tongue slid across his teeth. “You expect me to trust you? You skipped my concert last month and showed up with Harrington, covered in scratches and slices a-and bruises. You told me to trust you then, and I did. That there wasn’t anything going on between you and The King,” He spat out the nickname, poison dripping from his words as he continued. “Yet he’s the only one who knows what really happened that week. And then I fucking dress up in this stupid tux to surprise you and you’re dancing in his arms?!”

“It wasn’t like th-

“Oh, don’t give me that fucking bullshit!” He rolled his eyes. “He’s the one who you look at with these-these fucking eyes of adoration- and you expect me to trust you?! You don’t even trust me enough to tell me where the fuck those scars came from, Y/N!”

“It’s not that I don’t trust you, Eddie!” You shook your head quickly, taking a step towards him only watch him step back. “There’s a lot I’m not telling you but it’s for your safety-“

“My safety?!” His eyebrows shot up. “My fucking safety?! Jesus, wh- are you part of the FBI? You can’t honestly expect me to believe you when-“

“Eddie, I wish I could tell you more! I want to-“

“When you can’t even tell me you love me, sweetheart!” He shouted over you, ignoring the glares of the people walking to and from their cars.

There it was. There it fucking was. He knew your stance on love, and your inability to allow yourself to fall in love. You made it perfectly clear from the beginning that you couldn’t offer him that. It was never a matter of exclusivity, you stayed loyal through it all.

It had absolutely nothing to do with him; he was a phenomenal man and boyfriend. And you made sure to vocalize that. Often. Your appreciation, your adoration, your affection- those were the words that constantly fell from your lips. During dates, concerts, lazy nights on his couch, late nights in his arms- during kisses and love making. You always let him know how you felt about him.

Your eyes fluttered shut as you processed the words that shot through you like daggers. He watched as your face shifted from one of desperation to one of betrayal. He knew he was wrong to hold it against you, to bring it up as a topic of an argument. But couldn’t help it anymore. He couldn’t only have half of you. Not if he was meant to trust you.

“You know why I can’t fall in love,” You lowered your voice to an unrecognizable tone. “I saw what it did to my mom. I felt what it was like to lose the people I love. Eddie- I…” You took a deep breath to collect your anger and speak levelheadedly, empathetically. “It’s not you, Eds. It’s me. It’s my problem. And I was fully open about it before we-“

“Wanna know the craziest part of all of this?” He blinked away his tears as he finally looked deep into your eyes, showing you the raw, unadulterated emotions behind them. You couldn’t help but feel the knot in your throat build to the point where you had to hold your breath to hold in the sob that teased under the surface. “If you could just tell me those three little words, I’d let this all go. I’d drop to my knees and beg for your forgiveness.”

He sniffled, his tears now pouring down his face like the water of a river flows: desperately falling down, tracing the high and low points of his cheeks, and dropping by the dozen off of his chin. “I’d give up every good thing in my life just for the honor of calling you mine. And not just half of you, Y/N. That’s just not enough for me anymore. I mean-.. How can I trust you to be careful with my heart if you can’t even grant me the same?”

Your breath quivered as you drew in a breath, only for it to be interrupted with a sob.

“It’s not you,” You pressed your hand to your stomach, hoping to relieve some of the overwhelming tension that built up there. “Eddie, I want to. You have no idea how badly I want to. But I can’t.”

He let out another scoff, wiping his tears aggressively before he spoke up in a different tone. No longer was it the soft, anguished pleading tone. It was now empty and emotionless.

“You say you can’t love but I’m not blind. I see the way you look at him. The way you smile when you’re around him,” He looked up as he shook his head, somehow damming the waterfall that previously occupied his red and puffy face. “I hear the way you talk to and about him-“

“Eddie, you’re wrong-“ You frowned

“The hell I am!” He shouted before lowering his voice again. “It’s not a matter of whether or not you can love. You obviously can! You just surround yourself with people you can’t bring yourself to fall in love with so that you can keep your heart guarded! But what about mine? Huh?!”

“Eddie, please don’t do this,” You sobbed, letting your face fall into your hands as he continued to shout.

“No, you don’t get to do that. Look at me, Y/N!” He placed his hands gently but firmly on your cheeks. “You dragged me along a fucking year, telling me you weren’t able to fall in love and completely disregarding the fact that I am head over heels for you, Y/N! I was perfectly fine having you as you were. But then you started to hide things from me and sneak around with Steve. You can love. Hell, you ARE in love. It’s just not with me.”

“Can we just talk this through?” You stepped forward, grabbing his arms as you looked up at him. Your heart shattered on the spot when he looked at you. It was like he was looking at a stranger. All of the love that was previously there was gone. “Please. P-Please, I don’t wanna lose this. Lose you! Just-“

“Don’t touch me,” He stepped back from your embrace, not being able to look into your hopeless eyes. You both stood in silence, nothing but your soft sobs and his sniffles filled the air around you. Somehow, even the music from the gymnasium seemed to be a million miles away.

“You have it all wrong, you know,” He finally said, fishing his keys out of his pocket. You looked up at him with confusion, the wet mascara still running fresh down your cheeks. His voice broke as he said his final words to you, “Because no matter how much I hate you right now and how much my heart hurts.. I wouldn’t take back a single moment I had with you… Do yourself a favor, Y/N. Tell him how you feel.”

“Eds-“

“But I never want to see you again,” He said firmly as he stepped past you. He opened his door. “Have a nice life, sweetheart.”

And with that, you watched the boy drive off into the night. Your knees gave out from under you, allowing them to hit the concrete below you as your head fell into your hands. You sobbed into them, not being able to lessen the tight feeling in your chest.

It felt like the air around you suddenly lost all traces of oxygen. Your ears rang from the sheer force of the crying. It was the first time you’d felt like this since..

“Y/N? Oh, my God! Y/N!” You heard the familiar voice call before it’s owner’s footsteps picked up to a run. “Hey, hey, hey. Woah! What happened? Are you alright?”

You simply shook your head as you felt those warm arms pull you into a tight embrace. It was your turn to crumble into Steve’s arms as his hands gently rubbed your back.

“It’s alright, let it out.” He muttered into your hair as you weeped into the crook of his neck. He shrugged off his jacket before wrapping it around you, seeing as it was freezing and you were in a strapless dress. “I got you.. It’s alright, I got you.”

You didn’t know how long he held you for. Easily for much longer than you held him on Halloween. But he just let you cry into him, rubbing your back and whispering reassuring words into your ear as your sobs slowly came to a halt. He didn’t dare pull away until he felt you sit up.

“Want me to take you home?” Steve smiled softly, wiping the black tears from your puffy cheeks. He wanted so badly to ask what happened. He wanted to grab those bats from his trunk and show up at Eddie’s house to show him a lesson for breaking your heart.

But he didn’t.

He simply helped you up, wrapping a supportive arm around you as he walked you back to his car. He started it, blasting the heater to warm your shivering body, before he jogged over to Joyce and Hopper.

They asked what happened to you, having heard your sobs from the distance, and Steve explained that you got your heart broken by a freak with curtain bangs. They nodded and agreed to take the kids home, telling him to take good care of you.

And he did just that.

Season Three ->

———

PLEASE CHECK IN EVERY MONDAY AND FRIDAY AT 9:00 PM CTD FOR NEW CHAPTERS! (unless otherwise stated)

As always, please feel free to DM me or leave a comment on my stories! I love to hear your feedback and interact with all of you!! Don’t forget to like and reblog, it really helps me out!

a/n: IM LITERALLY SOBBING TOO! DONT COME FOR MY THROAT!! (or do hehe i love to hear it) IM SO FUCKING SAD RN BRO IM SORRYYYY EDDIE

TAGLIST IS NOW CLOSED!!

want post notifications and emotional support after this heart wrenching breakup?? come join our discord instead ->

@werewolfbanshee-love @reallysparklychaos @katsukiswrld @yashirawr @grfields @001andeddiearetodiefor @thatmarvelchick19 @fixtionlover @idkwhyimhere013 @b3rrysoda @tpwksummer @dawnyboy @rexorangecouny @kimmchijjajang @efvyqrs @lou-la-lou @nycbaby21 @satsuri3su @agustdeeyaa @boisteroussquirrel @fangeekkk @persephonesnebula @starstruckspring @bbyharlow @edithsvoice @harrycanyonmoonn @sharkswithsocks @xm00nl1ght @okei888 @lqveharrington @earthtostory @boobabietch @captainmarvelindisguise @astrumark @scoopsr0bin @hannahdoesstuff @homeofthepeculiar @potatoflavoured @binxy @ultrunning @azgucci @blogginjh @burdenedbliss @chervbs @lentil-s0up @ameliabs-world @mess-is-my-aesthetic @hopefulgardenerfun

#stranger things #steve harrington #joe keery #stranger things fanfic #stranger things fic #stranger things imagines #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fic #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson

[lucky-clover-gazette]

The Past is Beyond Our Control

Chapter 2: A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

AKA: Shadow and Vio Drink Root Beer; Are Evil

Rated T | Vio/Shadow | Modern Slasher AU Heavily Inspired by Until Dawn (2015) | 3,994 words in ch.2

His mind made up, Vio sighs and leans back in his chair. “You know what hurts my feelings the most?”

Shadow takes a deep sip of root beer, swallowing loudly. “Uh, were the terrifying chase sequence, attempted drugging, and general betrayal not enough?”

Vio reaches for the second can and pops it open with a satisfying fizz.

“You never even thought to ask for my help.”

Read it on AO3 (RECOMMENDED) or under the cut (with author's warnings AT THE END):

12:00 A.M.

One Year Ago

Vio takes a deep breath and enters the guest bedroom, gently shutting the door behind him.

“Hey,” says Shadow, all curled up on the window seat. He gives Vio a lazy wave and looks back to the snowy night sky.

“Hi,” Vio answers, brow furrowed. “Can I sit with you?”

Shadow makes some space. Vio sits.

“So,” Vio says slowly, “I can’t help but notice you’re not with the others.”

“Neither is Link,” Shadow points out, “and they’re his friends.”

“But not yours.” It’s a statement, not a question.

Shadow shakes his head. “I put up with them. Link seemed excited to have them visit. But I think I like it more when it’s just us.”

At that, Vio’s heart does something indescribable. “I was actually just thinking the same thing. The stuff they talk about, I just don’t understand why it matters. We’re going to graduate soon, get the hell out of here, set out to have whole lives of our own… but all they want to talk about is, like, prom. They just can’t see the big picture.”

Shadow turns to Vio, this time with his full attention. “The big picture?”

“Forget it. Clearly I’m just insecure that I don’t get along with the normal people.”

Shadow shakes his head, reaching out apprehensively. Vio loves the way he paints his nails and lets them chip. “I want to know what you think,” he says, placing his hand on Vio’s shoulder. “I’ll listen.”

Vio’s heart does the thing again.

“We shouldn’t be here,” he says, although he makes no effort to pull away. “We should find Link, and get back to the others…”

“Do you want to be here?” Shadow asks, even though they both already know the answer. Honestly, they’ve known for a while.

“Yes, but—”

“Vio,” Shadow interrupts, moving slightly closer. “Forget about Link and the others. This is about us. I’m tired of pretending, aren’t you?”

“Pretending?” Vio asks, his voice nearly a whisper. “Pretending what?”

Shadow presses his forehead against Vio’s. “Pretending that we’re just friends. Pretending we want anyone else in the room, when it could just be the two of us.”

“Ah,” Vio says, nuzzling closer.

“Pretending I don’t care what you do after graduation,” Shadow continues, his voice quietly cracking. “Pretending I’m not scared you’ll leave me.”

Vio’s eyes widen. “I’ve never wanted to leave you.”

“Pretending that I’m not relieved to hear that,” Shadow chuckles softly.

“Pretending,” Vio begins to say, but then stops. He steels his nerves and tries again. “Pretending that I don’t want to kiss you right now.”

Shadow’s eyes light up like the moon. “You want to kiss me?”

“Yes. Please don’t make me say it again.”

Shadow just looks at him. Vio feels fear creeping in.

“And you…?”

Shadow comforts him with a kiss. Vio’s first kiss, actually, and he assumes it’s Shadow’s too. Neither of them has ever shown much interest in anyone else—not when whatever they’ve had for the past several years has always felt so right.

It’s nice, Vio supposes, on a purely physical level. He likes cupping Shadow’s face and smelling his cologne. The warmth of Shadow’s body, so close to his own, is more than welcome on this freezing night.

But deep down, Vio knows it means even more than that. It’s Shadow’s body. His body, and his brain, and apparently his heart, too.

“Sorry about the letter,” Vio mutters as they finally pull away.

Shadow raises an eyebrow. “What letter?”

─────────────────

12:00 A.M.

Now

Vio smacks the can out of Shadow’s hand.

“Hey, my root beer!”

“Shut the fuck up,” Vio hisses, waving Shadow’s phone in his face. “Explain this. All of this,”—he motions to the entire room—“right goddamn now.”

Shadow takes the phone with a sour face. “So you’ve seen the texts.”

“And the blueprints, and the newspapers, and the mannequin wearing my clothes, Shadow, what the FUCK?!”

Shadow pulls out a desk chair from beneath the workbench, gesturing to it with a small smile. “Sit down, Vio.”

“Like hell I will!”

Shadow pauses, seeming to accept his refusal. Too little too late, but Vio appreciates it all the same. “I’m not hurting anyone, you know.”

“Of course not,” Vio scoffs. “Just giving them emotional scars to last a lifetime.”

Shadow’s words turn sharp. “It’s the least they deserve.”

“But why me? Why scare me, chase me, try to knock me out?”

“I was just gonna use laughing gas,” says Shadow, almost offended by Vio’s offense. “Did you not see the tank and the mask? Would have been just like the dentist, if you hadn’t fought me so hard.”

“You are not a goddamn dentist, Shadow!” Vio says between gritted teeth. “Nitrous is a whole fuckin’… fuckin’ uncontrolled chemical, that’s—”

Shadow throws up his hands in exasperation, wearing a grin that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “It’s the best I could have done, Vivi! You should be grateful I was there to catch you, protecting that pretty little head of yours from the cold hard ground.”

“Oh, right,” Vio huffs, collapsing into the offered seat. God, he is exhausted. “Super considerate of you, to hold me steady while you forcibly knock me out.”

“Comfier than how I dropped Blake and Reed.”

“Jesus Christ, Shadow,” Vio groans, running a hand down his own face, “you could have killed them. Actually killed them. If you’re going to do something like this, you have to—”

Shadow raises an eyebrow, intrigued. “I have to do what, Vio?”

“Forget it. I’m mad at you.”

They sit in silence for a moment, sobered by their own respective outbursts. Eventually, Shadow cracks.

He rolls his eyes, but his voice is ragged. Off, in the same way it’s been all day. Like he’s playing the part of a character and not a real person causing real pain. “Vivi—”

“Call me that again and I’ll call you Greyson.”

More silence. Shadow opens his mouth, closes it, and then opens it again. “…Violet?”

Vio sighs. “What, Shadow?”

“I really haven’t hurt anyone. Not physically.”

“You said you dropped Reed and Blake.”

“Onto the carpet, I was exaggerating.”

“That’s a really fucking weird thing to exaggerate about,” Vio snaps. “And I don’t know if I can trust you, anyway.”

Shadow’s frown deepens. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“For chasing you, and trying to knock you out.”

“That’s all?”

Reluctantly, Shadow nods. “You wanted me to be honest, so I’m being honest. I’m not sorry for what I’m doing to the others, but I never should have involved you.”

Vio feels tears roll down his cheeks.

“Shit,” Shadow says, eyes widening. “Shit, Vio, are you okay?”

“Of course I’m not okay!” Vio exclaims, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his sweater. “This isn’t just a game or a prank, you scared me! I thought I was going to die!”

“Everything was under control, you would have been fine.”

“I thought you were dead, too. How could you do that to me, Shadow?”

Vio’s concern appears to genuinely surprise Shadow. “It had to be convincing,” he weakly explains. “You had to think I—”

“Save it,” interrupts Vio between sniffles. “You know, even before tonight I was scared for you. It’s the only reason I came here in the first place.”

“Scared of what?”

Vio looks him dead in the eyes. “You disappeared for so long, and I knew you were alone. You know what.”

Shadow just sits with that for a moment.

“Vio,” he eventually says, “I won’t lie, I’ve been having a pretty rough time up here. I may have gone a little stir-crazy, but grief does that to people. Grief and anger, because what they did to Link was wrong and it got him killed. What I want is revenge, and I can’t get that if I’m dead too.”

Vio shakes his head. “They didn’t want him to die. They didn’t even want to hurt him, they were trying to do him a favor. If there’s anyone who’s responsible for Link leaving the lodge that night, Shadow, it’s us.”

Shadow looks surprised by the admission. “If you really think that,” he asks, “why the hell did you come back?”

“I already told you why. Don’t make me say it again.”

“Fine, touchy,” Shadow mutters, regaining a slight bit of humor. “You do get that I’m not taking an eye for an eye though, right? I don’t want them dead, I just want them to feel bad. Remember how cruel they were to us when Link disappeared? They never took accountability for anything. Even tonight, none of them have acknowledged the reason we’re here.”

“They might not want to make things uncomfortable, Shadow.”

“They should have thought about that last year,” Shadow says, vulnerable in his rage, “when they humiliated my brother and treated it like a joke.”

Vio thinks back to the way the others had acted after Link’s disappearance. He’s tried to bury his own disdain, for the sake of moving forward, but it is still there. That anger, that resentment. General dislike mixing with a legitimate vendetta, creating the perfect cocktail of negative emotions that led him to ditch everyone for a bath in the first place.

Shadow and Vio may have been the catalyst for Link leaving the lodge, but you know what? That chemical reaction wouldn’t have happened at all if the others had just minded their business.

“So the goal isn’t to hurt them,” Vio says, “but to… humiliate them? Punish them?”

“Ultimately,” Shadow explains, “I want to expose them. I’ve been fucking with their relationships and emotions all night, and slowly manipulating them to where I need them to be for a final confrontation. Reed and Blake first, using you as bait, and then Grant and Zelda.”

“Kind of like what they did to us,” Vio realizes aloud.

Shadow nods, almost grimly. “I’m going to force them to confess their guilt. People tend to be more honest when they think they’re about to die.”

“Like, in front of a camera? To show the investigators?”

Shadow shakes his head. “No. I just want them to say it. Then I’ll leave you all alone, forever.”

“I’m not leaving you.”

Shadow laughs dryly. “You definitely should. I’m in pretty deep with this plan, and there’s no going back now.”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed this,” Vio says, “but I’m in pretty deep too. We all are, thanks to you.”

“This isn’t a bit you want to commit to, Vio,” warns Shadow. It’s a half-hearted warning, though, and his face is full of intrigue.

His mind made up, Vio sighs and leans back in his chair. “You know what hurts my feelings the most?”

Shadow takes a deep sip of root beer, swallowing loudly. “Uh, were the terrifying chase sequence, attempted drugging, and general betrayal not enough?”

Vio reaches for the second can and pops it open with a satisfying fizz.

“You never even thought to ask for my help.”

─────────────────

12:07 A.M.

One Year Ago

“What letter?” Shadow asks, tilting his head.

Oh, shit.

Vio turns to see the bedroom door wide open, a balled-up piece of paper dropped at the threshold.

“Fuck,” he says, ripping himself out of Shadow’s arms.

“What? What’s wrong?”

Vio leans over the railing, down to the foyer where the others sit. The others, minus…

“Link!” Vio exclaims, gathering their attention. “Where is Link?”

Blake raises an eyebrow. “Uh, he’s supposed to be in the room with you.”

“Is everything okay?” asks Reed with genuine concern.

“Vio,” Shadow says quietly, pulling at his sleeve. “Vio, why is the front door open?”

“I don’t know, but it’s letting in the cold,” Zelda complains. As if on cue, a freezing gust of wind floods the lodge.

“This is my fault,” Vio says. “I thought it was Shadow, and I—”

“Is he outside now?” Shadow asks the group, almost tripping as he runs down the stairs.

Grant widens his eyes, now properly alarmed. “We didn’t hear him leave, I swear—”

“He didn’t even bring his coat!” Shadow shouts, shaking the puffy white jacket in his hand. “It’s cold and dark as hell out there, he’s going to—”

“He’ll be okay,” Vio says, immediately by Shadow’s side.

“Oh, leave him alone,” Blake dismisses, rolling his eyes. “I don’t think he wants to see either of you right now, anyway.”

“I think Blake is right,” Reed says softly, still snuggled up to his own prom date. “He might need space to process. I’m sorry, I thought that you liked him, and he liked you, so—”

“You don’t have to apologize,” says Zelda. “It’s not our fault he’s overreacting.”

Vio calls her something very unkind in his head.

“Zel,” Grant warns, but doesn’t follow through with any particular threat.

“Fuck you all,” Shadow mutters, stepping into his snow boots. “I’m going to find my brother.”

Another cold gust of wind fills the lodge. Vio looks at the wall thermometer and winces. “Shadow, I don’t know about this…”

“You too?” Shadow snaps, meeting Vio’s eyes. “It’s fucking fine, my parents own the mountain, I know where I’m going.”

Vio knows Shadow should go. Shadow knows Shadow should go. But something deep in Vio’s gut screams for them both to stay right here, inside the lodge, warm and safe until Link returns.

“But if you both know the mountain so well,” Vio says carefully, “wouldn’t Link know where he’s going too?”

Something crosses over Shadow’s face. He stops fastening his boot.

“I’m not sure,” he says, expression grim. “I feel like something bad is going to happen to him out there.”

“It’s just a feeling,” Vio counters softly, as if he isn’t acting on his own. He turns back to the others, harsh again. “Do you know if he brought his phone?”

“Do you see it anywhere?” asks Zelda, almost bored. “Because if not, I think you can assume he’s got it on him.”

Vio turns to Shadow. “What do you want to do? We can try to give him a call, or…?”

Shadow glances outside, into the frigid dark night. Then he looks back at Vio.

Vio swallows, his stomach turning at the thought of Link out there alone. Every second they spend searching, the farther away he could be. There are bears out there, and perilous structures, and god knows what else left over from the abandoned asylum and partially-collapsed mines. Link could suffer from any of those hazards and die out there alone.

Or he could be totally fine, listening to music with a 86% battery, and finding much-needed clarity in the cold. In that case, it’d probably just make him feel worse to see them both.

And if Link is in danger, the most selfish part of Vio thinks, there’s no reason Shadow should be too.

Shadow spares one last glance outside the lodge, and then he shuts the door.

─────────────────

1:14 A.M.

Now

“Quick, untie me!” Vio tells Reed and Blake, back in the abandoned hotel room where the mannequin wearing his clothes once sat. Reed gasps at the sight of him, while Blake only narrows his eyes.

“That goddamn creep,” he mutters, helping Reed free Vio from his bonds. “You okay?”

“Yes, I’m fine,” Vio says, avoiding his eyes. “What the hell happened to you guys? Is that blood?”

Blue looks down at not-Shadow’s blood staining his letterman jacket. “Ugh, yeah.”

“Whose?”

Reed and Blake exchange a glance. Reed turns back to Vio, expression soft.

“We found an injured elk in the woods,” he lies. “Attacked by a bear or something. Blake put it out of its misery.”

Vio forces himself not to scowl. “Oh, I’m sorry, that sounds awful. “

“But don’t worry about us!” Reed continues, motioning to Vio’s whole chair situation. “What happened to you?’

“I was taking a bath,” Vio recalls, “but when I got out, I realized someone took my clothes. Went I left the bathroom, someone had set up a bunch of balloons leading me to the home theater. Then I got chased into the basement, and there was this mask…”

“The maniac,” Blake mutters.

“You’ve seen him too?” asks Vio, eager to catch them both in their lie. Reed and Blake wince.

“Tell him the truth,” Blake tells Reed. “He deserves to know.”

Is that a hint of sympathy in Blake’s voice? At first Vio assumes it must be towards him or Shadow, but then he remembers what exactly Reed had done in the shed. He chose Blake over Shadow, resulting in Shadow’s ‘death.’ No wonder he lied at first.

Reed takes a deep breath. “You already know how dangerous he is,” he tells Vio, motioning again to the chair, “so you have to believe that I had no other choice.”

Yes the hell you did, Vio thinks. Except… was that even true? Shadow’s fake death was far too elaborate to be one of several possible outcomes. He must have rigged the trap so Blake would always live.

“He...” Red continues, as tears fill his eyes. “We were with Shadow, using the Ouija board, and we got some kind of message from Link. Link—Link’s ghost—told us to search for evidence of his killer in the library. Shadow freaked out and left, but Blake and I went anyway. We found some newspapers there, and the headline was about a guy with a grudge against the Farores, possibly hiding out in the abandoned sanatorium on the mountain. And then we found a super threatening note, bragging about Link’s murder, and went back to show Shadow… but he got to me first and I blacked out.”

Vio turns to Blake. “And you?”

“Also blacked out,” he says, somewhat sheepishly. “Some kind of gas.”

It is kind of funny to Vio, that the mentally ill theater nerd managed to take down a jock.

Not funny, he reminds himself. None of this is funny.

“And what happened to Shadow?” Vio asks, a little too eager to watch them both squirm. Shadow himself, watching from a hidden camera in his control room, probably feels the same way.

Reed looks to Blake, tears now running down his cheeks. Blake sighs and nods, continuing the story himself. “I woke up tied to a board next to Shadow. Reed was stuck on the other side of some bars. The maniac told Reed to choose one of us to live, and one of us to…”

Vio does his best shocked expression. “Blake. Where is Shadow?”

Reed sniffles.

“Blake.”

The jock meets his eyes dead-on. “Shadow didn’t make it.”

Vio squeezes his eyes shut, channeling the anger and grief still lingering from Link’s death. “I don’t want to hear any more of this.”

“Good,” Blake says, “because it was a super fucked up way to go.” Reed elbows him in the gut. “Hey!”

Vio takes a deep breath. Time to get this show on the road. “We’re going to find him,” he tells the others, “and we’re going to kill him before he can hurt anyone else.”

“Screw that,” says Blake. “Let’s just hide until we know he’s gone.”

“You’re helping me, at least,” Vio tells Reed. “You owe me that much.”

Blue rolls his eyes. “No he doesn’t. What happened to Shadow has nothing to do with you.”

That’s exactly what Vio would expect him to say, given his original response to Link’s disappearance. Maybe Shadow was right, these assholes will dodge responsibility until the day they die. If he wants an apology, he might have to convince them today is that day.

Vio shakes his head. What the fuck is wrong with me?

“But it does,” Reed says sadly. “It’s my fault he died, and I know he meant a lot to you. We didn’t know him like we knew Link, but we still liked him too.”

Somehow, Vio finds himself wanting to comfort Reed. “I know,” he says, a little sheepish.

And he’s alive, he wants to tell them both. You don’t have to be guilty, because he’s alive!

But Link is still dead. And isn’t that the whole point?

“I still think we should stay the hell out of this freak’s way,” Blake says stiffly, “but I guess there’s no guarantee he’s not watching us right now.”

“Let’s hope he isn’t,” Vio says, glancing over at the hidden camera. Shadow will like that. It will put him at ease. Vio doesn’t think he’s genuinely dangerous, but he is unstable. Hopefully Vio can help to mitigate some of his rage so his plan stays together at the seams.

What happens after the plan, Vio is trying not to consider. Knowing Shadow, he’d take the blame for it all. And his parents are very rich. As long as no one gets hurt, they both could get out of this with clean criminal records. See? Harm reduction.

“When did he get you?” Blake asks, glancing behind his back. “Have you been down here before, or did you just wake up here?”

“Well, I put up a good fight,” Vio says, “while he chased me through the basement.”

Rede’s eyes widen. “Without your clothes?”

“I had a robe.”

“Oh. That’s nice.”

It was, Vio reflects. Thank you, Shadow, for leaving it.

“But he did eventually manage to knock me out with the gas,” Vio continues, turning back to the hidden camera. “Only someone very clever and resourceful could have successfully evaded him.”

He can picture Shadow’s smile so clearly.

“Anyway,” Vio says, “I think I know where I’m going.”

He supposes he should be acting more distraught over Shadow’s death, but this isn’t the first sudden loss of a friend they’ve all experienced together. They know, probably better than most, how people can grieve differently, and often suppress their emotions for the sake of getting by.

Guilt tugs at Vio, for multiple reasons this time. He shakes it off and heads for the door.

“Come on,” he tells Blake and Reed. “Are you armed?”

“No,” Blake grumbles. Good.

“Vio,” says Reed, “are you sure you’re okay?”

Vio turns on his heel to face them again. “I’ll be okay when I get justice for Shadow.” And that, at least, is the truth.

“Do you think this is where he’s been planning everything?” Reed whispers as they enter the utility space.

“Seems likely,” says Vio. “And look—he’s been practicing.”

Passing the still-open meat locker, Blake and Reed loudly gag. Vio holds out an arm to stop them both, right beside the closed door to Shadow’s workshop.

“Okay, look,” he says, pointing to the half-open door at the end of the hall. “See that?”

“Uh-huh,” nods Reed.

“I think that’s where the hotel connects to the abandoned asylum,” Vio explains. “And didn’t you say something earlier, about the killer hiding out there?”

Blake sighs. “I really don’t think we need to go looking for him. We should go back to the lodge and hide.”

“Fine,” Vio scowls. “You two can bail. But I’m getting that fucker, for Shadow and Link.”

Reed and Blake exchange another loaded glance. Finally, Reed speaks, taking Blake’s hand in his own.

“We’ll come,” he says, although Blake clearly still disagrees. “We owe them that much.”

It’s close to the confession Shadow wants, but still not quite right. Reed might just be talking about his choice tonight that resulted in Shadow’s death, not even thinking about the way he and the others had acted last year. What they’d enabled, and how they hadn’t even lifted a finger to help.

It wasn’t enough, but at least they were getting somewhere.

“Thank you,” Vio says flatly, leading them to the door at the end of the hall. “I think once we’re in there, we might be able to find some weapons. We could use his arsenal against him.”

“I wouldn’t mind that,” Blake admits. “See how he likes it.”

“Revenge is the best medicine,” Vio agrees. He opens the door and holds it for the others, motioning inside. “Hurry on in.”

#my writing #four swords #four swords manga #vidow #fsff23 #vio link #shadow link #red blink #blue link #fs

[boytickler35]

Freddy grinds his teeth as Nevel smugly explains his current plot to shut them down and Freddy hates to admit it, but this time it’s air-tight. He actually owns the iCarly web page and there isn’t much any of them can do about it.

Carly and Sam stand with him facing Nevel. He can feel Sam fuming and he is worried she is going to commit a felony, which isn’t new. Carly just seems distressed and he feels sort of numb. They’ve been fighting Nevel off for years and now it all ends like this?

“I will give it back on one condition.”

“I’m not kissing you,” Carly says immediately and Freddy nods along because she shouldn’t have to.

“I don’t want a kiss from you, Carly Shay. You didn’t want one from me all the times I offered it to you and now you will rue the day!”

Carly looks a little startled and honestly, he is too. Nevel has been trying to kiss her for almost as long as he has been messing with them and now that he has the perfect can’t-be-refused opportunity, he turns it down? That is next level spite.

“So what do you want then?” His voice wavers a bit as he asks it and when Nevel’s eyes fall on him, he squirms a little.

The other boy crosses the small distance between them and brushes up against him as he announces, “I want you, Freddy Benson.”

His brain short circuits because gross, Nevel, and also why?

“Deal.”

Sam takes less than thirty seconds to decide as much, and his jaw drops. He looks at Carly, both in shock and for help but she shifts uncomfortably and asks, “For how long?”

“Carly!”

“Two hours. Less time than we spent together the first time we met.” Nevel’s voice is slick and persuasive, and it’s obviously working.

Carly looks at him helplessly and he feels sick to his stomach as she says, “It isn’t that long, Freddy. I had to deal with him on the shame date for longer.”

Nevel interjects and pushes, “Do I have a deal then?”

“Don’t I get a say in this?”

All three people in the room reply with a resounding, ‘no’, in unison.

“Wait-” he says, but the girls are already out the door, which Nevel closes behind them and looks at Freddy who feels empty- there’s a feeling of betrayal that he isn’t sure he knows how to deal with, combined with a dread of being left with Nevel.

“You still lose. iCarly will continue.”

It’s the only thing he can think to say because honestly, he’s confused. Nevel had them, and he gave it up?

The other boy ignores the statement, or maybe starts explaining in a roundabout way.

“I am going to start my own show, iNevel.”

Freddy rolls his eyes. “And you need a tech person.”

“No.”

Freddy blinks. “No?”

“No.” Nevel clarifies. “I need a partner.”

With a delicate finger beckoning, Nevel begins leading him down into the basement.

Freddy hates basements. He hates the one at the apartment, he hates all the ones he has been locked in over the years, he has no reason to suspect he will like this one.

Downstairs is a simple studio, it has none of the bells and whistles that the iCarly studio has. A simple camera, and a stage against an odd brick wall. It’s odd because it’s just there… The wall is in the middle of the room, so it isn’t load bearing. It seems like it was just created for a backdrop. On the wall is a mount of some kind. It looks a bit like a trophy plaque. It’s made of wood, but has nothing on it except three holes arranged in a triangle.

Nevel motions for him to follow around to the back side where there is a seat set very far forward and the three holes.

“Sit.” Nevel commands and Freddy frowns but does. Nevel moves back to the other side of the wall and then the holes get bigger.

“Put your head and feet in.”

Freddy grumbles but he does, a moment later sitting uncomfortably with his head and feet sticking out. He doesn’t think he has ever seen his feet this up-close before. Nevel shifts something and Freddy realizes the plaque opened somehow and is now closed around him.

There is a camera now pointed at them, the light flashing to indicate it is recording.

“Welcome to the first iNevel broadcast where today we have Freddy Benson, the tech wiz of the iCarly channel. Like many of you, I too watch the weekly live streams, and I too have had my fair looks at the feet of the most famous tech nerd in Seattle and like many of you, I also fell in love.”

Freddy’s brain freezes up because what?

“And even though I have them all to myself, I thought it would be better to share them with all of you.”

He notices a monitor set up where he can see the comments section of the stream which is blowing up. They… really like his feet. He feels his toes curl at comments about licking them and worshiping them, but tickling comes up the most often and that makes him cringe.

“So today, we are going to tickle these feet all stream. You post in chat what you want to see, and Freddy will get to pick what happens to his pretty feet.

“This is so messed up,” Freddy groans as the comments continue to fly.

It doesn’t matter what he says though, because it changes nothing.

“Alright Freddy Benson, pick. My fingers on your handsome feet for three minutes, or this brush for one minute?”

Nevel holds up a plastic brush. It’s intimidating, but Freddy growls. Nevel may have him here but he doesn’t have to play along. He isn’t about to make this easy for the punk.

Unfortunately, Nevel seems to have anticipated that and when it becomes clear he isn’t going to get an answer, Nevel’s fingers lay into his feet with no warning. The fingernails aren’t sharp, not like Sam’s when she scratches him, but sharp enough to light up every nerve in his foot as they pass over it, driving Freddy wild.

It feels like it takes forever for the tickling to stop but as soon as it does, Freddy feels the brush make contact and like lightning, starts thrashing and squirming. He tries to kick but the stocks that hold him prevent any movement of his feet other than flicking his soles up and down at the ankles which he does in a desperate but ultimately futile attempt to protect his poor feet from their tickling.

When it stops, he’s gasping for breath as Nevel asks, “Do you want your soles tickled by my fingers for three minutes, or your toes for one?”

“Soles-” Freddy gasps out, not even really thinking about the fact that he is consenting to the tickling just knowing Nevel will go for his toes otherwise and that can’t happen.

He does regret the decision right away though as the nails return to their abuses of his soles. Nevel goes so far as to grab one sole in a headlock and press his thumb and index finger together before drilling into the perfect center of his sole. He can’t even throw his head back to laugh because of the headstock and the total lack of movement adds to the heightened tickling.

“Toes for thirty seconds or brushes for three.”

Freddy pales and Nevel smirks and says, “Tick-tock Freddy Benson. You know what happens if you don’t decide.”

The brush was terrible, but his toes- this is impossible!

“Umm- toes!”

He curses himself the second he says it because Nevel does nor spare his toes at all, going right at them with feverish delight and even though Freddy tries to clench his toes, it isn’t anywhere near enough to dull the sensation to something manageable.

“Tell us a story about your feet, or tell us how you take care of them to keep them so perfectly ticklish.”

Freddy blushes and then says, “I don’t really think I have any stories about them being tickled so I guess I apply lotion before I go to sleep and after I shower.”

Not by choice, another of his mom’s many weird idiosyncrasies. It isn’t just to his feet, it’s everywhere and it does mean he doesn’t have dry skin like other people have to deal with.

“Really? No guy has ever seen these feet and given them a good tickling? What a shame.”

Freddy thinks Nevel might be flirting with him but luckily he isn’t given much time to think about that because the next challenge is up almost right away. “Feather five minutes or brush for three?”

“Feather.”

There is no way a feather is that bad and as Nevel brings the fluffy part down on his sole, Freddy smirks, confident for the first time because he feels it, but it isn’t nearly as ticklish as any of the other things.

His victory is short lived because Nevel flips the feather upside down and goes at him with the point of it which Freddy decides is like a worse finger nail. It’s pointer, and more tickly, there’s only one of them which is a relief but not much of one.

Five minutes of that give Freddy plenty of time to see the error in his ways and it feels like much longer than five minutes. Nevel is also cooing softly to him but Freddy can barely hear over his own laughter which is a mixed blessing.

As soon as it finishes Nevel says, “People must have liked my feather work because it might be back for round two. Feather between your toes for three minutes, or brush under your toes for the same time?”

“Feather?”

At this point he isn’t sure there is a right choice but once the feather saws between his squirming toes, he can’t help but hope this was the right one because that would mean something could tickle worse than this, and Freddy isn’t ready to contemplate that possibility.

Nevel doesn’t even have to do anything fancy… not that Freddy is sure there is a fancy way to tickle someone but Nevel just saws the feather back and forth and that is more than enough to keep Freddy in hysterics with milliseconds of peace when Nevel moves the feather to torture a different pair of toes.

“Brush under your toes for one minute or on your soles for five.”

Freddy groans because he is almost tempted to let it happen to his toes but that would be madness so he reluctantly says, “Soles.”

“Desperate to protect those toes, huh? I can’t wait to get at them more.”

Nevel’s teasing is the least of his worries as the brush bristles assault his soles and Nevel makes sure to cover his whole foot this time, heels up to the balls of his feet. Only his toes escape and while Freddy is happy for that, the rest is pure torture. Especially since Nevel never keeps things predictable, he always targets a new area or changes the speed just enough that any mental prepping Freddy tries to do is totally pointless and the five minutes feel closer to five years.

“Give Nevel ownership to your feet and let him sign them, or five minutes with the brush.” Nevel smirks when he finishes reading and taunts, “I know what I want.”

Freddy grumbles and says, “Sign them.”

“That isn’t it, Freddy Benson. You have something else you need to say.”

He wrinkles his nose and says, “Nevel owns my feet? You are doing what you want with them anyway, so what does it maThEHR!”

“Careful or you’ll make me write it sloppy and then I’ll have to start again.”

Freddy tries his best to hold still but the cool, damp pen tickles- maybe not worse than the brush or the feathers, but different and still terrible. There’s a few moments where Nevel blows puffs of cool air on his sweaty feet that have him ready to jump out of his skin as well. He has no doubt that tomorrow morning when he has to wash the message off that he will feel a rush of shame, but that sounds like a humiliation for later.

“Get your toes kissed, or sucked?”

Because apparently there is still humiliation for today to deal with. He has no idea which he is supposed to pick so Freddy blushes and says, “Kissed I guess.”

It sounds less invasive but Nevel seems all too delighted to work his way down the line and leave a sloppy, wet kiss on each toe which has Freddy giggling and feeling conflicted about not totally hating or being disgusted by the feeling.

It occurs to Freddy how messed up this is, making him pick what form of tickling he has to suffer through. He has to choose, or Nevel will do both, but there is a humiliating level of having input into it at all. Instead of a passive position, he is forced to take an active part in it. He doesn’t want Nevel’s mouth anywhere near his feet, and yet here is choosing to have his toes kissed by his nemesis.

“Fuzz thread? Or lickled?”

Freddy blinks for a moment and then says, “Thread?”

He has no idea what the thread is, but he can only guess which two words are put together to create lickled and he is all too happy to avoid that.

The thread Nevel pulls out is exactly as advertised, pink and fuzzy and for a blissful moment, Freddy fails to understand its true purpose because it doesn’t look like it will be too bad on his soles. And then Nevel laces it between his toes and he realizes what a grace mistake he made, “No- Lickle- lickle!”

But too late the murderous thread slides between his big toe and it’s neighbor and he can hear Nevel taunting him but can’t really make it out because the fluff between his toes sawing back and forth is new levels of maddening.

If he had been curious about what Nevel said, which he isn’t, he ends up getting an answer anyway in the form of Nevel’s warm, wet tongue on his soles and that, combined with the thread, nearly causes him to pass out from sensory overload.

Nevel gives him a break after that and Freddy feels weirdly thankful to his tickler for it because he isn’t sure he could have gone back into another round of it right away. Of course, it doesn’t last nearly long enough and Nevel is quickly giving him the next choice.

“Lotion or oil?”

Freddy frowns and then says, “Lotion?”

He isn’t sure what the point is but judging from Nevel’s look of glee, there is one, or he’s just happy for any excuse to touch Freddy’s feet. He pumps a generous amount into his hand and then starts to massage it into Freddy’s soles, taking more time than Freddy thinks is necessary. Once finished, Nevel continues by asking, “Fingers for five or brush for three?”

Freddy sighs and says, “Brush.” At this point, he figures the shorter tickle challenges he takes, the more chances he has for non tickle ones to pop up and that might keep him sane through all of this.

It’s only after the brush makes contact that he realizes what the point of the lotion is and that he’s made a terrible mistake because if the brush was murder before, the frictionless surface of his now lotioned feet make it doubly so. He had assumed it couldn’t get any worse, but the way the brush just slides across his soles with no effort at all means that it tickles even more and even faster and Freddy is howling but still totally trapped and now more ticklish than ever.

It isn’t even the brush, every tool is far more menacing with the lotion all over his feet and the only minor consolation is Nevel won’t put his mouth on Freddy’s feet over the oil which isn’t much of a prize.

Eventually, he stops paying attention to the options and just picks the first one each time, too tired to try to figure out which will tickle less.

Freddy is nearly hysterical when the stream ends, tears sting the corners of his eyes and sweat has dripped into them, making them sting. He feels the pressure on his ankles and neck let up and he pulls himself out. He reaches for his socks, eager to get them on and get out of this whole, humiliating ordeal when Nevel grabs his hands and leads him over to a couch where he pulls Freddy’s still bare and very tingly feet onto his lap.

“No way- no more tickling.”

The horror of saying the word has worn off after having it done to him for an hour straight but Nevel’s hands grasp his soles and instead start massaging them, leading to a groan of pleasure from Freddy.

“I meant what I said. People will pay good money to see these feet tickled. The stream made several hundred, and I will of course be sending half of it your way.”

Freddy’s eyes widen, both at the amount made, and the fact that Nevel is just giving him a cut.

“I told you. I was looking for a partner, not a tech person.”

He flushes a darker red as Nevel continues.

“I have had a crush on these feet for a long time, and maybe on the boy who owns them.”

Deflecting, Freddy replies, “You would have a crush on yourself.”

It’s awkward to use all of that to escape the idea that Nevel might have a crush on him.

He feels two wet kisses placed on his big toes and turns an even darker shade of red. “On air I might, but I don’t think so off air, at least not until you let me.”

The world is truly a messed up place if Nevel Papperman would be sweet talking him, and Freddy might be falling for it.

“You have a crush on Carly,” he says, hoping to get Nevel to admit this is all bull.

“I did. But then I saw you. At first it was strictly a foot thing but then I realized that you have something she doesn’t have, loyalty. Imagine if you gave that to someone who appreciated it, instead of trading you to me for two hours without more than three minutes of thinking about it?”

“I don’t know that you’ll be loyal.”

“I will prove it. Over time at least. You’ll see.”

Freddy rolls his eyes here and says, “Or I’ll rue it?”

Nevel shrugs. “I can’t say. I have no plans on getting revenge on you if you don’t, but you already know how appreciated you are by your friends.”

Freddy doesn’t have a reply to that. Nevel massages his feet until the phantom tickles are finally gone, he talks a bit, not seeming to mind that Freddy gives no replies. Some of it is about Freddy and is cute feet, which is awkward. Some of it is about things he realized he admired about Freddy, which is more awkward because it’s compliments no one has ever given to him. Mostly it’s idle chatter about nothing in particular and it’s strange that Freddy is more at ease here, knowing he can just relax and Sam isn’t going to come attack him or Carly isn’t going to need his help in some scheme.

Nevel lets him out shortly after and the whole way home, he thinks it all over in his head.

iNeveliNeveliNeveliNeveliNeveliNeveliNeveliNeveliNeveliNeveliNeveliNevel

Freddy, sweaty but happy glances at the camera, his feet are currently being tickled, and he’s exhausted but they are over seven hours into the tickle live stream. Nevel’s set up a monitor so Freddy can watch the comments, something he’s come to love doing. It’s beyond anything he’s ever imagined, but honestly, he wishes it had happened sooner.

#ticklefic #ticklestory #ticklishboys #ticklishfeet #sfw tickling community #tickle content #tickle thoughts #malefeetstory #ticklecommunity #malefootstories #icarly #freddy benson #nevel papperman

[chocolatecake47]

Rayla is like: 

Watched her parents leave “I watched you leave"/"Stood there and watched you walk away, from everything we had”, - them being gone/missing for most of her childhood (“but when will you be back?”) “Skies grew darker, currents swept you out again, and you were just gone and gone, gone and gone”- Their ghosting/outcasting “Cause I honestly believed in you/Holdin’ on, the days drag on" - Her trauma and stigma around her parents betrayal slowly isolating her from everyone “My friends from home don’t know what to say”

Coming on a mission of vengeance and murder at only 15 years old and choosing to change the narrative (“My heart for Xadia!/Say the word and I’ll go back into that tower with you!”) “People look at me like I'm a monster"/"I brought a knife to a gunfight"/"when I fought you used to tell me I was brave” - Fighting her father for people she doesn’t know just because its the right thing “they strike to kill and you know I will"/"you had to kill me but it killed you just the same” - Getting ghosted herself and literally being able to travel all over the world and go anymore but not the place she grew up in “And I can go anywhere I want, anywhere I want, just not home” - Believing in her core that she’s not good enough even though she did the right thing, believing everyone is right to be disappointed in her (“they’re right to reject me! I’m never good enough and I never will be!”) “I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting"/"They used to cheer when they saw my face, now I fear I have fallen from grace”  - Truly believing that her pain is irrelevant “I know my pain is such an imposition” because she thinks she doesn’t matter “Always taking up too much space or time”, - Expresses surprise over being loved because no one has ever been so open about it or loved her in her hardest darkest moments “starry eyes sparking up my darkest night"/"Rare as the glimmer of a comet in the sky, and he feels like home” - Thinking she has to defend her parents honor and die because of their supposed failure (“All of this happened because my parents ran away, so I have to stay and defend the dragon queen”) “Ghosts from your past gonna jump out at me”/“Remember how I said I’d die for you?”- Thinking it is her job to save everyone without letting anyone be there for her but it always ends up being more complicated “Never a clean break, no one here to save me”

The war finally over, everyone thinking things were finally ‘calming down’ but she was distracted, stressed, looking for closure, her mind kept reeling until her body finally did as well “Clearing the air, I breathed in the smoke”, - Waking up from nightmares with the reality of 3 of her parents being dead crashing over her and holding strong to that sacrificing mentality ("They said that, sometimes, we make sacrifices so that the ones we love don’t have to. It’s part of protecting them”) “I wake in the night, I pace like a ghost, the room is on fire, invisible smoke, and all of my heroes died all alone, help me hold on to you”, Waking from horrible nightmares that Viren has done something to Callum which results in her leaving before he can leave her “I wake up screaming from dreaming, one day I’ll watch as your leaving, and life will loose all its meaning, for the last time”, Desperately wanting her logic to be understood ("Please Callum, this is about who I am") "You say, “I don’t understand,” and I say, “I know you don’t” - Had such a fear the world would divide them it tore at her inside until she couldn’t bear it “I loved you in spite of, deep fears that the world would divide us” - Leaving without telling him  (“Don’t follow me, and don’t look for me {I have to go}.”) “Left Cornelia Street before you even knew I was gone” - Her self-sabotaging brain thinking that despite the love the last two weeks have given her she still wasn’t deserving of good things, and she had to leave because thats what they (meaning her family) did (“But I can’t let you stop me, Callum. No matter how much I want to. I wish I could say that we will see each other again, but I don’t know if we will.”) “Don’t pretend its such a mystery, think about the place where you first met me”, - Believing she’s a burden and her parents aren’t Callum’s problem to deal with/she’s not Callum’s problem to deal with anymore (“from doing what I know I have to do. Leaving.”) “I’m not your problem anymore”, - desperately hoping that he doesn’t hate her even though she’s hurt him, because she thinks she’s doing the right thing by building an illusion to protect him (“Please don’t hate me when that illusion fades, Callum.”)“Never wanted you to hate me” - desperately hoping he’ll still trust her and want her after “Will you forgive my soul when you’re too wise to trust me and too old to care?” - Searching everywhere for any trace of Viren, any trace of what happened to her parents to make the wound stop bleeding “Trace the evidence, make it make some sense, why the wound is still bleeding” - the thought of Callum being something that got her through her hardest times alone “And when I was shipwrecked, I thought of you/When it was real enough, to get me through" - the idea of coming home to Callum & Ezran being the only thing keeping her going “And I just want to run to you, And every time I don’t, I almost do”,

Not knowing what to say, not knowing how to turn up empty-handed after two years, not knowing what to do to make things better, but only knowing that she is falling apart and is goddamn trying her best and she needs him (“All day I’ve, I mean, all week really, I’ve been so nervous and kind of edge-frazzled, you know?”) “And maybe I don’t quite know what to say, but I’m here in your doorway; I just wanted you to know that this is me trying”/“Standing in front of you saying, “I’m sorry for that night”, - The part of her brain that is mean to her thinking its justified if Callum doesn’t want to be with her anymore after what she’s done “So if the chain is on your door I understand” but deep down her heart wants him to say that it wasn’t her fault and everything will be okay and they will be best friends again and that he understands her twisted logic and forgives her for it “Tell me that you’re still mine, tell me that we’ll be just fine, even when I loose my mind/tell me that its not my fault, tell me that I’m all you want, even when I break your heart” - knowing that she has a lot of trust to rebuild with a lot of people “There are so many lines that I’ve crossed unforgiven” -resulting to wait forever, offering to put his heart back together, and promising to never leave again, “I want you for worse or for better, I would wait for ever and ever, broke your heart, I’ll put it back together” because he is the best thing that ever happened to her and the best thing thats ever been hers even if she is realizing it and admitting to it a little late (“the best thing I ever had: you”) “You are the best thing thats ever been mine”.

Long story short the world screwed her over and over and over again. She was the prey so much she quickly had to become the archer in order to survive.

PS. I didn’t want to tag every song cuz then it gets launched into a whole different side of Tumblr, but if you’re wondering where I pulled lyrics from they are all listed under the cut in (hopefully) chronological order (even though I did repeat songs a couple times but not lyrics!)

Haunted 

This Love

White horse

Your on your own kid

Castles Crumbling

Call it what you want

Mad woman

My tears ricochet (this song is so Rayla/Runaan-coded omg)

You’re loosing me

Tolerate it

Long story short

Ours 

False God

Breathe

Daylight

The Archer (this song is also so Rayla-coded)

Anti-Hero

Dancing with our hands tied

Cornelia Street

Getaway Car

Exile

Hits different 

Evermore 

I almost do (Rayllum-coded for sure)

This is me trying

Back to December (this is the most Rayllum-coded song I've ever heard)

Afterglow (i pulled the whole bridge from here basically)

How you get the girl

Mine

#tdp rayla #the dragon prince #this is a complete psychological breakdown of Rayla's life lol 😅 #took me five days once the inspo started hitting #dont ask me where this idea came from #i just love Rayla #im nervous

[elisysd]

42. If to change is what you need you can change right next to me

Masterlist - Previously - Next

Chapter soundtrack: Grow as we go - Ben Platt

She was beautiful. Objectively beautiful. The red spaghetti strapped dress in silk was clinging to her figure in the most gorgeous way, stopping right below her knees. Her make-up, carefully done by her aunt Kika, was making her blue-green eyes pop and her brown hair was put in a low bun to which a few loose strands were escaping it, delicately framing her face. So why wasn’t she feeling beautiful? Why was she feeling like an empty shell? She knew why. Of course, she knew. It had less to do with her physical appearance and more with a certain blond driver and the guilt associated with him.

Lost in her reflection, she didn’t hear the door opening behind her, revealing her mom in an ethereal white pearled backless dress, her hair falling down on her shoulders. Seeing her daughter looking so confused, Lyanna’s heart ached and she slowly approached her, throwing an arm over her shoulders and pulling her against her.

“Care to tell me what is going on in your pretty mind?”

“Not nice things.” Julia whispered.

“Ethan?”

“I think it’s over mom. With Ethan. I screwed up a big time and he didn’t talk to me at all yesterday. I tried to corner him a few times, but between the last minute preparations and making sure everyone was doing okay, I barely found the time to talk to him. And I think he is avoiding me. I can’t blame him.”

“I hate to say it but it’s probably for the best. As much as you wanted to, you're not ready to fall and… listen to me. I know you tried, I know you think you gave your all but sometimes it’s best to take a step back in order to make sure you’re ready. And right now, with Ethan you’re not ready. Both of you.”

“Dad told him about Ferrari… I think it made everything worse because I know Ethan felt it like a betrayal. I wanted to tell him, I was about to, I swear, but dad…. and the worst of the worst was to tell him that I would work closely with Martin. That was a low blow. And I feel bad because right now I really hate dad…”

“I know and believe me he didn’t have a nice evening. He feels guilty but you know him, sometimes he is not the sharpest tool of the shed.”

Julia involuntarily let out a laugh.

“I’m sorry. I don’t want to ruin your day with my mood. I’m happy for you it’s just…”

“Stop saying sorry for everything, Ju’. You’re too harsh sometimes with yourself. And you’re not ruining everything, you made an amazing job with helping me to organize everything. I’m proud of you. And I’m proud of you being my daughter, no matter what. So chin up, show your beautiful smile to everyone and let’s go, it’s going to start soon.”

Julia nodded and went outside where the ceremony would take place. She helped everyone find their seat before checking, one last time, the catering when she felt a presence behind her.

“Ju’… can we talk? I don’t like knowing you’re mad at me.” it was the worried voice of her dad.

“Maybe you should have thought about it before throwing me under the bus and hurting Ethan in the process.”

“I’m sorry. It was really stupid, indeed. I’ll apologize to him, I promise.”

“I just…. I don’t understand! He looks up to you so much. He considers you like a father figure and you… you just let him down, he was already on the ground but you still kept on kicking him where it hurt. He didn’t need that. I had already hurt him enough.”

“I’m scared for you. The way he acted in Canada…”

“And he feels bad enough! You know that he would never hurt me.”

“You can never know, Ju. His family's past is not the best… His dad was very aggressive when he was his age and there were rumors about his granddad being no better. And what Ethan did in Canada showed that he really is his dad’s son.”

“He is not! See, that’s because of people like you that he’s done what he’s done! Because you’re always seeing in him nothing else than a copy of his dad but he is not! He is so much more than that but you all refuse to see it. He made me happy dad. Sure, he fucked up but it doesn’t make him any less worthy of being loved. He doesn’t deserve you pushing him away. He just needs someone by his side who tells him that he is a good guy. I wish I could be this person but I’m clearly not. Not right now, at least. So please, don’t be mean to him.”

“Did you guys break up?”

“Not officially but I don’t see how we can recover from something like that. We are not in the right headspace. We are not good for each other. I need to focus on me and my career and he needs to come to terms with a few things on his own. I can’t help him to do that.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Not as much as me. Now, I believe it’s almost time, you have a wife to confess your undying love to.”

She didn’t know it, but hidden behind a tree Ethan had heard the conversation. It was a bittersweet feeling, knowing she had his back in front of the others but to feel her so freaking far away from him when they were together. He stayed in his position, looking at her from afar as she was talking to some people. She was gorgeous, probably the most beautiful woman in the room and he was glad to see her in the red dress. he contemplated the idea to go to her, to apologize for his outburst, to tell her that he was happy to see her finally getting the job of her dreams, to tell he he was proud of her, to tell her that he always had known since they were kids she would make it, to tell her that he loved her.

As he was about to make his way to her, he saw her going to Elijah. Ethan couldn’t believe it, he had always thought that the Spaniard would stick to Ferrari, the team had relied on him so much for the development of the car, listening to his feedback, prioritizing him in the strategies… Who could replace him? Martin was only in his first year there and would take over the role of the leader as a replacement but he didn’t know who else on the grid could go there. Kyle’s contract was ending at the end of the year but unless something big was going to happen, he would renew with Lamborghini, Ethan’s contract was ending as well and even if he knew his future was more uncertain than ever, he knew for sure he wouldn’t get a proposition for Ferrari. As far as he knew, no other drivers were ending their contract at the end of the year so unless Ferrari was betting on a rookie, he didn’t know who would get the seat.

Slowly, he went to his seat, next to his dad who was busy talking to Lando. In silence, he sat down not wanting to interrupt the conversation.

“Hey Ethan buddy, how are you doing?” Lando asked him.

“I’ve been better.” he shrugged.

“Girl problem?”

“Kind of.”

“Did you talk to Julia?” Max turned to him as well.

“No… she is busy, I’ll try to after the ceremony when she’ll finally be able to relax. We can’t avoid each other all day long.”

Soon silence fell around the guests as Charles took place with Louis on the little stage that had been made so everyone could see. Soon it was Julia’s turn to arrive, surrounded by the other bridesmaid and finally it was Lyanna’s turn to appear. Ethan didn’t listen to any of the words that were pronounced between Charles and Lyanna, too busy staring at the girl in red who herself was busy looking at her parents with a proud smile. His gaze moved quickly to Louis who was fidgeting with his suit as if he wanted nothing more but to get rid of it. Ethan let out a laugh. He missed the teen. He missed the way he was perceiving the world and the complex human relationships, he missed his love for comic books and the way he wouldn’t shut up about insects. And he missed their late night conversations over texts. He had never told Julia about them, it was Louis and his little secret. He couldn’t count the amount of discussions they had about girls and flirting techniques or about life in general. There was one text that Ethan had printed out and that he was keeping dearly in his wallet.

You are like my big brother. I hope one day you’ll be for real.

It had been the very first time Ethan had contemplated the idea of a future with Julia. What it would be like. And strangely, the thought didn’t make him want to run away.He saw Charles taking Lyanna in his arms and spinning her around as she smiled widely. Julia was clapping her hands before throwing an arm around Louis’ shoulders, resting her head on top of his. He couldn’t resist the idea to snap a picture of them and to send it, almost immediately, to Louis. Everyone made their way to the tents as the music was starting to play. He took his seat between Kyle and Elijah as conversations were flowing around him.

As everyone was slowly making their way to the buffet he waited until he saw Julia’s going and quickly stood up.

“That was a beautiful ceremony.” he said when he was next to her as she was filling her plate.

“You didn’t pay attention. I saw you staring at Louis a few times, you seemed lost in thoughts.”

“In that case you didn’t pay attention either if you were too busy looking at me.” he replied and he swore he saw her smile. It was quick but it was there. “And I’m not even going to try to deny it. You’re gorgeous.”

“You’re not too bad yourself, blue is truly your colour.” she whispered.

“Just like red is yours… I hope you’ll save me a dance.” he said, brushing past her and making her shiver.

She barely had the time to nod that he had already left. She came back to her table and sat next to Louis, her mind still on Ethan.

“Why isn’t Ethan with us? Did you fight?” Louis asked her, his mouth full of pasta.

“We are not really together anymore, Louis…”

“But… why? You love him. You stay with people when you love them.”

“It’s more complicated than that, Lou.”

“Well, it shouldn’t.”

She saw her brother’s face changing and she instinctively reached out to him, putting her hand on his shoulder.

“I know you like Ethan but…”

“No, but. He is my friend. And I want to keep my friend with me. But now because you are not with him anymore it means that I won’t see him again.”

“Louis… that’s not true, you can still be friends with him. I know he would like that.”

“But it’s going to hurt you. And I don’t want to hurt you…”

“It’s not going to be easy for sure, but I saw how you opened yourself more with him and I don't want you to lose that.”

Their conversation was interrupted by the orchestra that started to play their parents' wedding song and she saw her dad taking her mom’s hand in his to take her to the center of the room. Seeing them swaying along the song’s rhythm made Julia smile and soon, she reached out to her brother to take him with her. She saw her mom giving her a happy smile as Louis was awkwardly putting his hands around her waist and focusing on the song that was playing. When it was finally over, the cake was brought on and glasses of champagne were served as music was keeping on flowing.

Soon Louis abandoned her to go talk to his best friend, Percy, as Julia was left alone in the corner of the room. She took the opportunity to observe everyone. Her uncles and aunts were having fun on the dancefloor, as well as Romy and Kyle who were laughing together, eyes glued to one another making Julia think they probably would be the next wedding she would go to. They were made for each other, it was obvious for anyone who would take a look at them. It made her smile bitter. In another life, maybe it could have been her and Ethan. She was so focused on what was in front of her that she didn’t see that her dad was approaching and it’s only when he gave her his hand that she noticed him.

“I dance with the woman of my life, I would love to dance with the second one.”

She rolled her eyes.

“That’s really cheesy, I hope you know that.”

“If a wedding is not the perfect time to be cheesy then I don’t know when it would be!”

“Okay, fine, I’ll give you that. Let’s go.”

She followed her dad as he started to slowly make her swing. She saw Louis dancing with her mom and that’s when she finally noticed that they were the only people on the dancefloor. Slowly, her dad made them dance to her brother and mother before making a change and Julia found her mom’s arms as Louis was now with their dad. It drew a smile on her face, seeing how awkward Louis was not knowing where to put his hands.

“You know, Ju’, this ceremony makes my heart full, I’m really happy and all but seeing your dad and your brother so close after all this time, that is making me even happier.” Lyanna whispered in Julia’s ear.

“I’m happy they found their way to each other too. It gives hope about relationships.”

“You and Ethan will make it. Maybe not today or tomorrow but someday. I’m sure of it.”

“How can you be?”

“Because what is between you both is strong. And that type of bond is hard to break, no matter how hard you try.”

“I’m not sure mom… I’m really not.”

Finally, the song stopped playing to start another one as other people started to join. Julia was about to head for a drink when Martin’s appeared in front of her. His hands were in his pockets and his laid back attitude, threw her off her feet. She was so used to seeing him focused and often hot headed on the tracks that seeing him this relaxed made her heart skip a beat. The sleeves of his green shirt made all the nuances of green in his eyes shimmer.

“Are you having fun?” she asks, trying to start a conversation.

“It’s a beautiful day. And it gives me the occasion to not see Charles stressed out for once, so…”

“He is not that bad…” she smiled.

“Oh no, don’t get me wrong I love working with him and I feel like I learned so much in the span of a few months, it’s just he is always brooding or very focused and I barely see him smile. So to see him like that.. it’s nice, I’m getting a glimpse of what he is truly like and somehow it makes me belong somewhere.”

“You’re not close to your family?”

“My mother doesn’t support my career, she has always been very against it.”

“What about your dad?”

“Let’s say that financing my career was a great way of keeping me away from home. He is not the nicest person to be around.”

Feeling that there could be more to his story than what meets the eye, Julia didn’t dare to ask. If Martin wanted to talk about it, he would do it on his own terms.

“And your sister?”

“She is probably what I love the most in this world. Looking at you caring about Louis reminds me so much of me and Georgia. I wish I could see her more often.”

He looked to the ground, trying to keep his emotions in check and when he finally looked at her, he had a smile on his face that contrasted with the dark look he had a few seconds ago when he mentioned his parents.

“No more sad talks for today. Dance with me?”

She didn’t have the will to refuse and she followed him. The song playing was a dancing one and she laughed when Martin started to make weird moves for the sole purpose of making her laugh, which she did gladly. She tried to mimic his moves and to not care about what anyone might say and it felt liberating until she felt hands on her hips and as she turned around expecting to see Martin, she was slightly confused to encounter two blue eyes. And as if it was on purpose, the song suddenly changed to a slow one.

“Did you ask the DJ to start playing this song?”

“Maybe.” whispered Ethan, his gaze diving into her as he pulled her against him even more, letting his fingers graze the thin material of her dress.”And you promised me a dance.”

“I was already dancing…”

“With Martin. And he is a bad dancer, you deserve better.”

“Better as in with you?”

He shrugged, making her turn around as his hands fell on her stomach and his lips found her ear.

“I need to talk to you, Julia. It’s important.”

“Can’t it wait? We are having a good time.”

“If I’m not telling you now, I will never do it. So, please, follow me?”

She looked around and found Martin’s eyes alone on the dance floor. She sent him an apologetic look before following Ethan outside, near the water fountain. The sun was already starting to set and the orange light reflected on the water, giving it a glistening look. Julia sat down on the edge, letting her hands wander on the surface as Ethan was taking place next to her.

“So… I have to tell you something.”

“I’m listening…”

She didn’t know what to expect when it came to Ethan. She was preparing for the worst and it made her heart ache knowing it was her first thought.

“I forgot to tell you something… it’s very important and I have to come clean because I know that if I don’t I’ll lose you and I don’t want that. I really don’t, Julia.”

“I’m right there Ethan and you’re scaring me.”

He took her hands in his and she could feel him shaking.

“I don’t want to see you around Martin anymore.” he blurted out and she couldn’t help but clench her jaw and rolled her eyes.

“I don’t want to have this fucking conversation with you again. If this was what you wanted to say, I’m out. I don’t want to hear it.”

She stood up and was about to leave him there, she felt his hand grabbing her wrist forcing her to stop dead in her tracks.

“Please, just listen! I hate the fucking hole in my chest whenever I see him with his arms around you. I hate the person I become when I see you laugh at his stupid jokes. I hate myself, but somehow I hate myself less when you’re next to me. I hate that I love you, Joolsie. So sue me for acting like the fool that I am when I’m with you. I’m pathetic. I know that. I’m the one here pouring my heart out to you in hopes you’ll give me a chance to fix what I know I’ve broken. I’m begging you to stay when six months ago I was the one laughing at girls who had the same speech that I’m giving you right now. Laugh at me. Please laugh. Because this whole situation is laughable. I guess that’s what they were thinking of when they were telling me that karma was going to come and bite me in the ass. Julia please, I’m begging you today to not become the one that gets away. Please, choose me. Please, come home with me.”

Of all the things she had expected, it was certainly the last one. She looked at him, her mouth agape, trying to register what he had just said. It couldn’t be true. Not now, not when she had hoped countless times to hear this words coming out of his mouth. Not when she was planning to focus on herself and to end, or at least pause, whatever there was between them. She saw a distress in him that made her feel guiltier than ever. She was going to break his heart, it was clear now and the more she was leaving him hanging, the more she could see him slowly breaking down.

“This is not what I planned… not like this.” she whispered more to herself as she felt Ethan coming close. She took a step back, knowing full well that if she was letting him come any closer, all her defenses would fall down and she would be unable to resist him.

“Joolsie..”

“Don’t. Please, don’t. I… I’m sorry, I can’t. I can’t do that.”

“You can’t do what?”

“I can’t love you. I’m about to have the career I’ve always wanted, I need to prove to myself that I can do it. I need to work on myself. And you do too because no matter what you’re thinking, we are messed up. You and me. And we are messing up each other more together than separately. And we don’t deserve that. You don’t deserve that, me neither. I can’t, Ethan. I can’t offer you what you want. I would love to and I wish I could but I have to think about myself. I need to choose myself. For once, I need to be selfish.” she tried to explain through the tears.

“Julia… Please, don’t leave. I promise, I’ll change. For you. Just… I love you. I swear I do.”

“I’m sorry, Ethan. So sorry.”

As she disappeared, tears streaming down her face, Ethan collapsed on the ground feeling like his heart had just stopped beating.

Author's note: I'm sorry. Like really sorry. But they have to go through that in order to be better people. Trust me on this. What do you think will happen next? Let me know your theories, I love to read them.

Don't hesitate to leave a comment or an ask, as well as reblogging and leaving a like. Besides the fact that I absolutely love to read you, it helps a lot for the story to find its audience. I also have a taglist for this story, so if you want to be added so you never miss a chapter, let me know.

Taglist:

@herondalism @aundercover @musingsbyshreya @karmabyfernando @reengard @mycenterfold @smoooothoperator

#writing #fiction #charles leclerc #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #f1 x oc #charles leclerc fanfic #max verstappen fanfic #max verstappen

[di-writes-stuff]

Evermore

Joel Miller x fem!Reader

Part 7

TW: Alcohol mentions, cursing, verbal arguments. Mostly just fluff and angst.

As the doors to Jacksonville open, what you see is like a foreign land.

It was…humanity?

People being people.

Mothers going on walks with their children.

Men drinking together on a porch.

There’s groups of people riding in and out on horses, together.

Working together.

Helping each other.

No robbing, killing, betrayal. Nobody is afraid of the person standing next to them. There’s comfort.

There’s trust.

It’s been so long since you’ve seen something like this. Such a blatant lack of hostility. A world that doesn’t revolve around killing or being killed. A world thats civilized.

Joel and Ellie gave you a glimmer of that. That trust, that comfort, that protection.

But seeing it on such a big scale? It hits you like a freight train.

“So, Joel, wanna introduce your friends or…”

Tommy’s voice is a bit uncomfortable. The three of you have been standing at the entrance of the town for a while now, mouths hanging slightly open as you take in the slight before you.

Joel turns to look at Tommy, introducing Ellie and explaining the situation to him before getting to you.

“And this is Y/N, my…uh, my…”

He trails off, words failing him as he tries to explain what exactly you two are.

Friends doesn’t cover it. It doesn’t begin to cover it.

But then again, it’s not like you two are anything, officially.

Doesn’t prevent his face from burning at the thought.

“This” is the word you two have been using to refer to it. Your bond. Your connection. Your…feelings. It’s just been this.

Partners feels too cold.

It really hits Joel that he has no idea what you are to him. He cares about you, of course he does.

He trusts you too.

He…

He can’t let himself admit it.

Not even in his own mind.

Those three words that haunt his thoughts whenever he looks at you lately.

Tommy has a bit of a smug smile on his face as he claps Joel on the shoulder.

He knows what the look on Joel’s face is.

It’s the same look he had when he brought a girl home for the first time.

“Don’t think too hard, ya might hurt yourself.”

You try to laugh at Tommy’s joke, but Joel refusing to name exactly what you are to him sends your mind spiraling with possibilities. You have no idea what you are to him.

You’ve never talked about it.

It’s like politics at the dinner table. The line neither of you dare to cross.

And you aren’t quite sure what he is to you either.

Joel is…he’s…

All you know is you…

Turns out you can’t admit it either.

Joel lets out a slightly uncomfortable chuckle, swiping his brothers hand away. His eyes slide over to you carefully, quickly flashing away when he finds you were already looking at him.

Ellie’s trying to very best not to laugh at the situation, the smile on her face obvious as she holds back.

Tommy continues to lead the three of you around, explaining what this place is, a commune of sorts, it seems.

As you stand in front of a bar, The Tipsy Bison, the blonde woman that nearly shot you earlier comes up to you.

“Hey. I-uh. I’m sorry about earlier. I’m Maria.”

You nod, understanding completely.

“It’s fine. Can’t be to careful.”

Introductions are made again, and Joel stops after saying your name this time around.

Tommy speaks again, sounding a little nervous when he does. “Well, Joel. This is your sister in law.”

You smile at Joel’s shocked expression.

“You’re married?” Joel asks incredulously, surprised that his little brother got married.

And if he’s being honest?

A little sad that he wasn’t there for it.

Tommy laughs at his shocked response. “Yeah man. Trust me, I didn’t think she would say yes either.”

You all laugh for a moment before Maria leads you into the bar, sitting you down at a table and bringing a few beers for the adults, and milk for Ellie.

As you sit you place your hand against the table, your fingers brushing against Joel’s.

You both forget to move them for a moment, contact has become less of a rarity between the two of you.

In fact, it’s starting to feel right whenever it happens.

You notice Tommy staring at your hands, and both you and Joel shift uncomfortably in sync.

It’s almost scary how similar you’ve become over the last couple of months.

You and Joel are like two pieces of the same whole. Yin and Yang. The halves of the moon.

Joel, he completes you entirely.

And you do the same for him.

There’s a moment of awkward silence. It’s obvious to everybody in the room that something is going on between you and Joel, painfully so.

Maria clears her throat.

“So, we’ve got a place you can stay for the night, if you want. It’s nothing fancy, but it’s got a couple rooms. Beds, too.”

Those words sound like a chorus of angels.

Beds.

Four walls and a roof.

This place might just be Heaven.

“Yes. I mean, thank you so much. That’d be great.” You quickly accept the offer, knowing Joel well enough to tell he wasn’t going to be so willing. Accepting help isn’t something that comes naturally to him.

You look over at Joel, praying he won’t disagree.

He’s about to decline before he looks at you, seeing the hopeful look on your face.

And suddenly, the word no is the last thing that he can think to say.

He nods, standing as Maria gets up to show you guys to the house. Tommy excuses himself to go do some work, and you follow his wife back onto the street.

“I’m guessing it’s been a while since you three have slept in a bed?” Maria asks.

You smile, shaking your head as you remember countless nights spent on the floor.

“You’ve got no idea.” You reply, enjoying the ease with which she talks to you. There’s not even a hint of a threat in her voice, and you can’t remember the last time you met a stranger like that.

You look up at Joel, watching as he looks around the town.

“Thank you, for letting them help us.” You speak to him quietly, and his looks down at you, a tiny smile appearing on his face when he sees you.

“It’s nothin.” He says casually, but you know better. You know there is nothing that man hates more than not being able to provide for himself. For the people who rely on him.

And letting them help him?

It feels like he’s passing him responsibilities to them.

It’s stupid, but it does. Yet, he does it anyway. And the reason why scares him a bit.

He’s doing it for you.

He’d do anything for you. There’s no point in denying it, not at this point, not when he knows just how much he cares for you. Letting himself care about you, get attached to you.

It’s the scariest thing Joel’s ever done.

Yet, he wouldn’t take it back for anything.

Not when he knows you care about him. It feels too good. Knowing he has somebody. That he has a person.

That you’re his person.

He doesn’t even realize you guys have entered the small house until you start walking up the stairs, too lost in his own thoughts. His thoughts of you.

“Here’s a room for you, Ellie. And, here’s yours.” Maria motions to a door on the left.

You and Joel go to enter the room and drop your packs off, and you freeze in the doorway.

When Maria said beds, she meant two. One for Ellie, and one for you and Joel.

You can feel your stomach drop and your face heat up as you stare at the single bed sitting in the middle of the room.

Joel’s whole body stiffens next to you when he sees the bed, knowing what it means.

Maria thought you two were…something.

Deep down in him, a thought occurs.

Aren’t you?

He pushes in down before it can grow.

“I, um, I can take the floor.” Joel speaks first, staring down at his boots as he does.

You sigh, looking at him.

“Joel, no. I can sleep on the floor, you take the bed.”

He gets ready to argue back before Maria interrupts.

“Oh. I- Oh my gosh. I’m so sorry. I thought…I just assumed you two…it seemed like..I’m so sorry. Listen we can find another place.” She trails off, forcing the humored smile off her face.

You turn around, not wanting to put her to more trouble. “No, no, it’s fine. I’ll take the floor.”

Joel glares at you.

“No, I will.”

You sigh.

“You’re older. You’re getting the bed.”

Joel’s eyebrows furrow at your reasoning. He wonders for a moment just how old you think he is.

Too old for you to…

He refocuses on the conversation at hand.

“I’m not sleeping on that bed while you lay on the floor all night.”

You roll your eyes.

“I appreciate the chivalry, but you’re taking the bed.”

“No, I’m not.”

Maria escorts herself as you continue arguing, laughing a bit when she turns the corner.

If you two aren’t together yet, you will be soon.

“Joel.” You say, taking on a warning tone.

“For the love of God Y/N, if you sleep on the floor I am too.”

You throw your hands up in annoyance, looking at the bed again when Ellie pops her head in the doorway.

“You two argue like a married couple.” She comments, snickering a bit before suggesting a compromise. “Besides, why don’t you just share it, it’s a big bed.”

Both you and Joel look like a couple of schoolgirls with how red you turn.

“Ellie!” Joel says chidingly.

She just laughs, returning to her temporary room.

You stare at the bed again, careful not to look at Joel.

…She’s not wrong. It’s a big bed.

How the hell are you supposed to say this?

“I mean…listen, I’m not saying we should, but she’s got a point.”

The gravity of your suggestion hits you after you say it.

Sleeping with Joel.

Being that close to him.

You haven’t been…well, intimate, since all this started.

So the idea of sleeping in the same bed with somebody?

It’s a bigger deal than it should be.

Especially when it’s Joel.

Speaking of Joel, he hasn’t said a word.

“I-I’m sorry. I just meant, you know. It’s a big bed, and we’re both always sore, and I just thought maybe-.”

“I’ll take the left.”

Joel’s voice interrupts you, his words shutting you up.

You were almost hoping he would say no. Now you actually have to do it.

You feel anxiety build in the pit of your stomach as you think about it.

But, it’s a little exciting.

You quickly force yourself not to think like that.

You also force yourself not to watch as Joel sheds his jacket and stretches, the muscles in his back clear through the thin fabric of his t-shirt.

Well.

You try not to watch.

Not very hard, though.

“Okay.”

Your fast agreement sends heat rushing through Joel’s whole body.

Deep down, he was hoping you’d suggest what you did the whole time. He feels bad about it. Almost dirty.

You’re not terribly younger than him, but still.

He feels gross.

He also feels like he’s being watched. He turns around to see you watching him like a hawk, your face painted pink with blush. The look in your eyes, and the way you avert your gaze the second he looks at you.

It tells him everything he needs to know.

A small smirk forms on his lips.

He doesn’t feel quite so bad after that.

He goes to leave, not before brushing past you in the doorway.

“Ya gonna drop off your bag?”

The question is innocent.

So. Innocent.

His tone, on the other hand?

You don’t know how he manages to make it sound like that.

It sends heat rushing to your face.

You drop your backpack on the floor wordlessly, walking out of the room. Joel trails closely behind you.

You poke your head into Ellie’s room.

“You doing okay?” You ask, trying to distract yourself from Joel.

She nods, reading what looks like a diary. You smile to yourself.

“Anything good in there?”

She snorts at your question, “Not really, just a bunch of stuff about boys. It’s pretty weird. Like, her biggest worries are grades and some guy named Kyle. He’s a douche, by the way.”

You smile, hiding how sad her reaction makes you. That girl has never known a normal life. Her whole world has been turmoil since she was born.

“Yeah, well. Most teenage girls are pretty lame. Actually, most teenagers are in general.”

She finally looks up at you, putting the book down.

“Are they all this obsessed with guys?”

You laugh and shake your head. “No, not all of them. I wasn’t, at the very least.”

You wince are your own words. You’re no better than a teenage girl now. Joel seems to consume every thought you have.

Joel, who’s leaning on the wall behind you, waiting for you.

His breath fans over your neck.

It sends shivers running down your spine.

Ellie huffs, picking up the diary again. You turn around and face Joel.

“Maria’s waiting out there.” He nods his head towards to hallway as he speaks. You begin walking that way, forcing yourself not to freeze when you feel Joel’s hand ghost over your lower back, leading you gently.

He drops his hand when you come in eyeshot of Maria, and you curse yourself for missing it’s presence.

Maria speaks evenly, not giving away that she notices the tension between you two.

“Hey. Um, I’m really sorry about the whole bed thing, again.”

Joel pipes up behind you. “It’s fine, really. Thank you again for all your help.”

He placed a special emphasis on the word really that makes your heart beat a little faster.

“Alright, if you’re sure.” She responds. “Anyway, if you guys aren’t up for it, I understand. But, there’s a little gathering at the bar tonight. Nothing big, just the adults around here. We get together, drink, swap stories, all that good stuff.”

She notices the unsure looks on both your faces.

You’re prepared to decline, and Joel nearly does before Maria speaks again.

“I know it sounds weird, but it’s nice to see people, well, being normal. Really. Just…think about it. Okay?”

You both nod slowly.

Joel’s still ready to say no.

You’re not quite so sure.

“Thank you. We’ll uh…we’ll talk about it.”

We.

Everything you and Joel do has become something you do together.

Ellie was right.

You really are like a married couple.

And you’d be a lying bastard if you said it didn’t make you a little giddy.

Maria nods and says her goodbyes before leaving.

Joel sighs loudly when she does.

“Not a chance.” He says, hoping to squash any ideas you had about convincing him.

“Oh, c’mon. Imagine having one normal night. One where your not watching your back the whole time for some clicker or robber. One where you can just relax.” You didn’t realize how much you wanted to experience that until you started vouching for it.

Joel gives you a look that you’ve come to recognize as his way of calling somebody an idiot.

“Yeah, cause being in a crowded bar, surrounded by people I don’t know is my idea of relaxing.” He answers sarcastically.

You lean over the counter you two are currently standing on opposite sides of.

“Please, Joel? It’s not like I’m gonna go alone. We don’t have to stay long, I just…listen. I wanna see it. See what Maria talked about. People acting like human beings instead of animals. You gotta understand that, at least a little?” You give him the same look from earlier.

The one he can’t bring himself to say no to.

The one that drives him crazy because your just so damn beautiful.

The one he can’t let himself look at too long.

Joel sighs, running a hand through his hair.

“Fine.”

The smile that spreads across your face is one of the best things he’s ever seen.

……………………………………………………………………………………

Joel Miller feels like a fool.

A clean, trimmed, combed fool.

He blames you.

He showered. He trimmed his beard. He even cleaned up his hair a bit.

All to try and impress you.

He is a fool.

And he’s waiting to walk you to a bar.

It’s not a date. He’s had to remind himself of that quite a few times now.

But by God, it’s starting to feel like one.

You walk out of the hallway, your hair falling over your shoulders instead of your usual braid. You’ve replaced your ratty old flannel with a tighter shirt for the night. One Joel assumes Maria gave you.

It’s nothing special.

In fact, it’s not really anything at all.

That doesn’t stop Joel from staring at you the way he is.

“Hey.”

You say it so casually.

Like you don’t know his palms are sweaty and his heart is racing right now because of you.

And maybe you don’t. But to Joel, it feels impossible that your still completely oblivious.

You’re not.

You see him staring, you see everything. You even see the way the fabric of his shirt rustles every time his heart pounds in his chest.

You know.

Ellie pokes her head out of her doorway.

“Have fun on your date!” She shouts, her teasing hasn’t stopped since she found out where you two were going, and Joel’s gotten the most of it.

You just shake your head and laugh, but Joel seems a bit more annoyed.

“Not. A. Date.” He annunciates each word, and you’d guess he’s said that more than a few times tonight.

He ignores the voice in the back of his head that agrees with her.

As the two of you walk out the door it’s quiet for a while. Not uncomfortably so, you’ve both gotten used to walking together in silence.

“Thank you, for coming with me.” You laugh a bit before continuing. “I’m sure you’d rather be doing anything else.”

He looks at you, something like love glistening in his eyes.

“It’s nothin. Besides, this…it ain’t too bad.” He admits, hoping you catch his meaning. Of course he’s not looking forward to the event itself.

But you?

That part, he definitely doesn’t mind.

You smile sweetly, looking down at the ground. You reach the bar fairly quickly, and Joel holds the door open for you as you enter.

Maria was right.

It’s nice. More than nice. It’s incredible. People are mingling everywhere, laughing, drinking, chatting.

Happy.

It feels too good to be true, but here it is, right in front of you.

Even Joel has to admit, it’s refreshing.

Both of you immediately veer towards the bar, where you’re greeted by Tommy.

“Hey!” He turns to you, a smile on his face. “How the hell did you manage to drag him here.”

You laugh a little, sitting down next to Joel.

“Aw, it wasn’t too hard. Just needed a little convincing.”

Tommy quirks an eyebrow, giving his brother a knowing look.

“Huh, guess you’ve got a magic touch, then. Joel might be the most anti-social man I’ve ever met.”

Joel rolls his eyes as if he’s heard this a million times before.

“Yeah yeah, how about some drinks, hmm?” Joel asks, clearly trying to shut up his younger brother.

Tommy laughs, handing over a couple bottles of beer, and two glasses of whiskey.

“On the house. Have fun, you two.” He flashes Joel a teasing look when he tells you to have fun, causing him to groan.

You sip at the whiskey, finding that it’s a hell of a lot less potent than the shit you’ve been drinking from Joel’s flask.

Both you and Joel stick to yourselves, talking like you always do. You start to lay off the booze when you feel yourself getting a bit fuzzy, not wanting to end up with a hangover tomorrow.

“Already? Damn, your a lightweight.” Joel nudges you a bit with his shoulder, laughing when you glare at him.

“Oh shush. I’m not that bad.” You respond, sighing when Joel looks pointedly at your meager pile of empty bottle, only a few sitting next to you.

You slap his shoulder and he laughs.

God, you love his laugh.

You could get drunk off his laugh.

Joel Miller is so much more intoxicating then anything you drank tonight.

“C’mon, you’re really telling me you can’t handle one more?”

You sigh, giving in and flagging down Tommy, grabbing another beer from him and downing it quickly.

You’re definitely tipsy.

Joel is too, but he doesn’t show it as much, and he certainly takes more to get there.

The song switches to a slow dance, and you turn around, watching as people move to dance. There’s an older couple right in the middle, probably in their sixties.

The way they look at each other, it’s like they never left their honeymoon.

You don’t let yourself look at Joel, but he’s the only thing that comes to your mind when you watch them.

You’re distracted watching couples swaying to the croony old music.

Tommy comes up behind Joel, speaking quietly.

“You’re a fool if you don’t ask her.”

Joel turns around, pulling his gaze from your face.

“I can’t.” He responds. He feels pathetic, but he can’t bring himself to do it.

“You can. You just won’t.”

Joel sighs. His brother is right, and it takes a lot for him to admit that.

Tommy slides him another shot, a knowing smile on his face.

“C’mon, man.”

Joel brings the cup to his lips, downing the shot quickly, turning to you before the liquid courage dies away.

He stands, the blood in his body rushing to his feet as he does. Every sense he has feels heightened when you turn to face him.

You tilt your head, confused for a moment when he extends a hand towards you. You look down at it for a moment before looking back at him, realization crossing your face when you realize what he’s doing.

“C’mon.”

It feels like his voice is the only sound in the room when he speaks.

You smile like a giddy teen at prom, taking his hand.

“I’m not very good at this.” You warn as he leads you to the outskirts of the floor.

“I’m not either.” He says, a smile playing on his lips when he feels your arms wrap around his neck, his own slipping around your waist.

You’re not sure if it counts as dancing, more like swaying. But it sends your stomach fluttering all the same.

“Thank you.”

Your voice is soft and shy when you speak, even meeting Joel’s eyes takes effort tonight.

He just nods, his mouth dry as he holds you. He wasn’t supposed to let it get this far. He was supposed to stop caring. He was supposed to consider you a partner. Nothing more. A comrade, almost.

And now?

He’s too far gone. Lost in you. Everything about you pulls him in, your voice, your laugh, your smile.

Joel doesn’t consider himself lovable.

He never has.

But you make him doubt that. Even if it’s just for a second. On late nights spent by the fire when you spend hours talking and your eyes meet, everything stops. You make him think maybe, just maybe, you could feel the same way he does.

But it fades, it always does.

Your heart races as you lay your head on his chest, desperate for an excuse to stop looking into his eyes, the ones you always find yourself coming back to.

On the contrary, Joel thinks his heart stops when he feels you settle into his arms.

It’s been months of this.

Months of pining.

Months of anticipation.

Of waiting for something to happen that will finally cross the line you two have drawn in the sand.

Months of patience.

It’s all getting to be too much.

You hear his heart hammering in his chest and you look up, the alcohol in your system making you a bit bolder than you would usually be.

“Joel…”

His eyes snap back to you when you say his name.

Holding back from each other. It’s a task your not sure you can do anymore.

One your not sure you want to do anymore.

Your right hand slips from the back of his neck to the side of his face, the left falling to his chest.

He leans in despite himself, pulling you closer to him. He should stop this. He doesn’t know how to do this. How not to be alone.

He can’t bring himself to do it.

Your lips brush slowly, softly, tentatively.

His hand moves to cup your head, and he kisses you. Really, kisses you.

And suddenly, Joel Miller is your whole world. His body pressed firm to yours, the warmth that radiates off of him.

His smell.

His hands.

His lips.

His kiss.

It’s so careful, yet so firm. His lips move against yours like God made them just for this purpose. The taste of the liquor he was drinking overwhelms your senses, and you gasp despite yourself. You lean further into the kiss, standing on your toes to deepen it.

And Joel. He could do this forever. He could be with you forever. He wants to be with you forever. He wants you. He needs you.

Fuck.

He needs you.

He’s come to rely on you, in a way.

The one mistake he can’t afford to make. The one he swore to himself he wouldn’t make.

Joel Miller loves you.

He pulls away suddenly, fear of his own feelings flooding his brain. He moves you back, dropping his hands back to his side. The hurt look on your face shatters him, but he can’t. He can’t stay. He can’t tell you why he stopped.

He can’t explain, because explaining would require confessing.

And that.

That would be the last straw.

And so he leaves you standing in the bar, confused, hurt, and alone.

……………………………………………………………………………………

It’s been hours since you got home and showered. You’ve been laying in bed, bathed in darkness, waiting. Worrying.

You wish you weren’t.

You wish you could say to hell with him and fall asleep.

But you can’t.

You can’t because you need Joel as much as he needs you.

Because you love him.

The thought is overwhelming. It’s foreign and it’s kind of terrifying.

But nonetheless, you’re laying in bed, waiting, praying, for Joel to come home.

The door to the bedroom opens, and you hear his familiar heavy steps. You breath a sigh of relief, not turning around, not daring to utter a word.

And the bastard gets in bed.

Like he didn’t do what he just did.

You can’t help it. Anger rushes through your body as you sit up and grab the pillow, smacking him with it.

He jumps, sitting up and turning to look at you.

“What the hell are you doing?” You ask, whisper-screaming him as to not wake up Ellie. You’re grateful for the darkness when you feel tears begin to form in your eyes.

“I thought you were asleep.” He says guiltily.

Your seething at this point.

“No, Joel, you asshole! I wasn’t asleep. I was up, I’ve been up this whole damn time waiting for you to get back. Because I care. I actually care, I don’t just pretend to.” You say, tears now dripping down your face as you throw the pillow at his chest. You wipe your face furiously, hating that your hurt.

Hating that all you want is to be back in that bar. Before he left. Back to that perfect moment.

The moment you thought he might actually care. That he wasn’t as bad as everybody, including himself, made him out to be.

He catches the pillow, grimacing when he feels a wet spot, one he figures out is from your tears.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” He whispers, shame coating every word he says.

You throw your hands up, getting up from the bed and pacing. “Oh, well if you’re sorry then I guess it’s all okay! I guess it doesn’t matter that you left me and didn’t say a fucking word. That you’ve acted like you cared for months all to just, what? Leave the second you get what you wanted out of me?”

He runs a hand over his face as he gets up too, trying to walk over to you when you point a finger at him.

“Get away from me.”

You’re dead serious. You want him away. Far far away, so that you can’t think about what it felt like to have him hold you.

“I never pretended to care. I do c-“ He begins, desperate to explain, but even more desperate to keep his secret.

You cut him off angrily “Oh shut up, Joel! Just shut up. You didn’t care. You still don’t care. People who care don’t do that. They don’t hurt you. They don’t fucking humiliate you. Do you have any idea how embarrassing that was? Us aside, standing there, watching you storm out and leave me. It was cruel, Joel. You’re cruel.”

You’re words hurt more than he ever would have though they could. And they’re not true. He never once pretended to care about you. In fact, the only thing he ever tried to pretend was that he didn’t.

“I’m sorry-“ He began again, trying to explain.

“No Joel! Stop saying your sorry! Stop apologizing! You made a fool of me. An absolute idiot. I thought…I thought you…”

You can’t say it.

It would be weak.

It would be pathetic.

You thought he loved you. For a second, you did.

He sees right through you. He knows exactly what you thought.

And he knows it’s true.

And he’s angry.

Furious, even.

Not at you, though.

Joel is livid with himself.

“I do, Y/N! I did and I do. And I realized it. It hit me tonight like a fucking freight train. And it terrified me, because I am not a good man. I’m mean, and I’m guarded, and I’ve got blood on my hands and a lot of it. And you deserve better then me. Than what I can give you. And God I want to be that for you, I wish I could. But I don’t know how to love somebody, Y/N.”

His chest heaves after he finishes speaking, the silence deafening.

Oh.

Oh.

Love.

He just confessed.

Not directly, but with all the clarity in the world, Joel Miller told you he loved you.

Your eyes soften, and you step closer to him, almost subconsciously, everything about him drawing you in.

“We can learn.” You speak gently now, every ounce of anger drained from your voice. Being mad at him is exhausting.

You raise your hands to cup his face, leaning up and kissing his forehead with every ounce of softness you can muster.

“Come to bed.” You whisper against his skin, moving away and climbing into bed, listening as he slips under the covers next to you.

You roll over, facing him as he lays on his back. Your eyes droop, and the last thing you hear before sleep takes you is Joel’s voice.

“Thank you.”

A/N: Okay so this is super long, so if you read the whole thing thank you. I really hope you enjoyed.

-di

#fanfic #joel miller #joel miller x fem!reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x you #tlou #tlou game #tlou joel #tlou2 #fanfiction #fanfic writer #fluff #angst #mutual pining #first kiss

[ramonag-if]

Hey there! Loved the new chapter(as usual) - got me feeling all kinds of emotions that I will not be recovering from anytime soon. 😭 I just wanted to write something cause I really love your writing and story and I’ve been following this WIP since it was posted(sorry if it’s long, I just really love these kinds of things).

While I’m not really angry with our mom, I don’t think my MC is gonna want to have anything to do with her cause seriously??? You leave your child with their emotionally closed off father who never expected to care for a child and was a part of a group that killed many of your people simply for their heritage? I understand you were trying to escape and now you’re a super important person leading a rebellion but you couldn’t even check in to see if your ex and child were still alive by like sending a spy disguised as a merchant or something? Having to be asked about Ahlf by her was painful(in like the best ways but I was also kind of offended for him). It doesn’t help that my MC has also been feeling like she won’t be accepted by the Ishari people because she wasn’t raised there and whatnot so seeing that her mom just had a whole other family with a daughter who *is* Ishari. Part of me wasn’t surprised we had a half-sibling but that didn’t stop the disappointment, feeling of betrayal and even some resentment - like wow you are a fantastic writer, thank you so much for blessing us with your art. 🥰

I have to ask though, what would our dad think about Salyra having this whole other family after everything that’s happened? While I’m not entirely sure how the two feel about each other, I can imagine he’d be upset for the MC. Like how they were just left to be taken care by him when he couldn’t be that parent they needed and how her absence and unknown status clearly affected them - not to mention the fact that Salyra thought they’d be safer in a small village of a country that was rather open about their problems with Ishari. She’s right that we don’t know what happened and how it went down but I mean did she ever really expect to see us again? Was she trying or did she just decide that there was no point?(spoilers most likely so ignore that I’m just really invested). I can’t help but wonder what our recently discovered family would think? I felt my MC’s fear when hearing about our half sibling that they would honesty prefer Rana to MC because now they would have a ‘real’ Ishari daughter of Salyra to bond with. Also, my first thought to Rana maybe developing a little crush on Irus was, “Nah, you already took my mom, you ain’t taking my Prince.” I know she’s like 10, and my MC is planning on being a good older sister but we gotta draw the line at Irus. He’s my MC’s emotional support Prince. 😅

Regardless, it isn’t looking all that great for Salyra and my MC will be keeping her at arms length unless she needs to gain favor in order to get the alliance or more help in some way(Literally would do anything for Irus, completely in love with him). I am so looking for to the drama though, you write it so well. 👀

Thank you so much for playing and I'm so happy you enjoyed the update 💖😊 And thank you so much for your continued support, it really means so much to me!

It is really a complicated thing with Salyra and you are more than free to feel upset/betrayed/hurt by the way she's gone about protecting the MC. I do enjoy complicated family dynamics, it's something that I've always tended to write about in my stories since I feel like it's not always showcased as much as romantic angst. Thank you for enjoying the angst, I do have a blast writing it 😆

You will get a chance to learn about Ahlf's feelings about Salyra - there's a lot that happened that the MC was unaware about between their parents and you'll also get to see the Vinian family react to Salyra in Part 3 😬😅

Don't worry, the Vinian family already love the MC and will accept the NC regardless of their heritage. Zikar's mother is from Vinia, so they're already quite open to other cultures.

Irus is never going to abandon the MC 😆 So rest assured, Rana's childhood crush will eventually fade away.

Salyra will help the MC regardless of their relationship because she sees it as her way if trying to make up for her absence, so feel free to be as upset and rude as you want 😋

#crown of exile #answered asks #chapter 5 spoilers #salyra #princeirus #rana

[elenavr13]

Phantom

Engineer Mark x Captain

Warning: None

*a week after ISWM*

*Despite the crystal being removed from the Captain’s hand, they can still feel it.*

Y/N’S POV

           Needles poke & jab at my skin under the thick, protective gloves. Pushing the tingling feeling to the back of my mind, I refocus my attention on the mission: return to my tent to retrieve some spare technical equipment to repair some of the damages the last electrical storm caused.

           “Theses aren’t second chances. Every mistake has cost the lives of people who have trusted you.” Lady’s words ring in my head again. Like I had all the previous times today, I push the memories to the back of my mind & bottle up my anxiety so I don’t break.

           Once in my tent, I head towards the boxes of spare parts that are temporarily residing in the corner of my quarters. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice a blue light shining on the boxes. I follow the hue to the source. “Couldn’t afford to let you make another mistake.” Stinging pain spikes through my palm & wrist.

           “No, no, no…” I screw my eyes shut yet when I open them again, the crystal is still embedded in my hand. My fingers rip my glove off of my left hand. To my dismay, the blue shard remains. Guilt burns in my chest as my head pounds hard against my skull. Warm streaks cascade down my cheeks, turning ice cold once they reach my jaw line.

           “I don’t know if you’re evil or just stupid!” There is that voice. “How could you do this to us? We trusted you. I trusted you, Captain!” Betrayal stings my ears, burrowing into my heart.

           “I’m sorry.” I whimper.

           “It all comes down to bad leadership.” My palm throbs from the heat the crystal is generating. “You’ve let down your crew, friends…all of these people trusted you with their lives, gone…all because of you.” The voices back me into a corner of the room. Pain floods my hand from the crystal corroding my skin. I pry at the blue stone with my other hand.

           “I can’t go back, please not again, not now.” My pleas are futile. I desperately try to remove the crystal but my suffering only worsens –just like whenever I tried to shut down the wormhole. Skin cells collect under my nails but still no progress. Red mixes with the blue light.

           “You reckless, careless, idiotic monster!”

           “Stop!” I can’t take it anymore. My knees collide with the floor before my back hunches over. Spasms wrack my body from me holding in any & all sound while I sob.

           “Captain!” The voice frets. Suddenly two hands grasp my shoulders. “Captain, it’s okay. I’m here. What’s wrong?” Worry reflects off Mark’s eyes.

           “I-I can’t go back, please.” I glance at my hand to see…no crystal. My tears stop from shock. It was just there.

           Mark takes notice of my palm as well. “Captain, wh-what happened?” His fingers delicately cup my hand for a second before he dashes to the med kit near the entrance. He returns with a disinfecting wipe & gauze. “How did this happen?” I watch as he carefully holds my hand again to clean my scratches.

           “I…it…the crystal, it…”

           “Shh, it’s okay. Just breathe. You’re safe now.” I scrunch my nose while he dabs the little blood away. Then gently, he wraps the gauze around my hand, hiding the large scar from where the crystal previously resided. “Better?” I nod. His thumbs brush the remaining tears off my cheeks. We remain in each other’s company in silence for a minute before Mark’s thoughts get the best of him. “Why didn’t you tell me the crystal left a scar?”

           “Because I didn’t want to make you feel worse. You’re already going through too much as is. I didn’t want to rub it in that…it left a permanent mark.” His eyes fixate on my bandaged hand as memories most likely run through his head. “You don’t have to worry. It doesn’t really hurt.”

           “Captain, don’t lie to me. I can’t help you if I don’t know what you’re going through.”

           Reluctantly, I loosely admit what occurred. “It occasionally burns like it would right before it would teleport me somewhere new & I…got scared that it would send me back.”

           “Is it still burning?” I nod. Gently, his hand clasps around mine with a light squeeze. The throbbing gradually dissipates. “How about now?” A small smile pulls at my lips. With another squeeze the pain nearly subsides fully.

           “It helps. Thank you.”

#iswm head engineer #iswm captain #iswm #in space with markiplier #markiplier ego x reader #youtuber ego #reader insert #space mark #markiplier

[starsinkpop]

ATEEZ Jung Wooyoung Tarot Reading - October 2023

Disclaimer: I do tarot readings for fun, so please read them with a grain of salt. Don’t take my words too seriously and just keep an open mind. Tarot is a divination tool that can’t predict the future, as every single individual has their own will and makes their own decisions. Tarot should be seen as a guidance and a good friend that just has your best interest and gives you advice when needed. I’m not putting anyone in my readings on a pedestal nor am I trying to harm anyone. One last side note, I’m not a native speaker, so please excuse any wrong spellings or poor grammar.

Date of Reading: October 6th 2023

Decks: Modern Witch Tarot Deck, Wild Mystic Oracle, Rebel Deck, Dreamscape Oracle, Romance Angel Oracle, Love Oracle

Wooyoung’s overall feelings and energy this month - Nine of Swords (R)

Wooyoung has a pretty turbulent month ahead of him. There could be a pretty big breakdown lurking around the corner. He could be involved in a scandal, which causes him to have sleepless nights because someone is not on his best side. However, there’s light at the end of tunnel and better times are waiting for him. He has to take extra care of himself and read people thoroughly and carefully to understand their true intentions. Not everyone who’s nice to him wants the best for him. He is urged to accept the help of loved ones.

Career - Ace of Swords (R)

Wooyoung could face some creative blocks in October. He has a hard time concentrating and focusing on his career. Again, there could be a scandal at the horizon, some misinformation could be spread about Wooyoung. He feels like life keeps stabbing him in the back and feels like a failure. He doesn’t seem to feel good enough for his job and lacks confidence. He could also feel kinda bored lately, there’s too much routine in his career and he could use some new perspective and variety. He can expect some injustice in his work life.

Love - 0 The Fool (R)

I think he’s dealing with a bit much right now so he’s really blocked off in his love life. Don’t get me wrong, he wants love and loves to love and actually wants to commit to someone but he has to love himself first (a classic, I know). He is urged to respect himself more and stop being harsh to himself to allow himself to find the paradise he’s looking for. He’s too restless and irrational for any new connection to be formed. There could’ve been some kind of betrayal that happened not too long ago which could also be the reason why he is being unfair to himself. Kinda blaming himself whenever something goes down bad.

Advice from the rebel deck

“If you are waiting for a sign - we’ll, here it fucking is”

“You got a good thing going. Don’t ruin that shit”

• • •

If you want a more in depth reading on certain areas, feel free to ask me!

~Nicky 🫧

Masterlist

#ateez #ateez tarot #wooyoung #wooyoung tarot #kpop tarot #jung wooyoung #wooyoung tarot reading #ateez tarot reading #kpop #kpop tarot reading #tarot #tarot reading