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avatar-anna · 2 years

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Better Off

Part Three

part three is here! sorry for the long wait, i've been really busy with work, but i have not forgotten about this fic! enjoy!

Series Masterlist

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June

I was at an end-of-the-year pool party one of the parent’s in Maddison's class was putting on. I didn’t expect an invitation for myself, but it was the dad that stayed to help with Maddie’s birthday party, and after seeing him more at a couple events and talking amicably with him a few times, I thought we had become somewhat friends, so I decided to go.

What I didn’t realize was that there seemed to be a dress code for this party. I showed up in a bikini, one of my old college t-shirts, and denim cut-offs, but when Michael, the dad who was hosting the party with his wife, led me into the backyard, I realized I was terribly underdressed. Not that I would ever own or wear a patterned kaftan or wedge sandals, but I could’ve at least worn one of the few sundresses that I owned. I tried to ignore some of the looks that I got and focused on getting sunscreen on Maddison so she could swim with the other kids. Once she was all set, I shrugged out of my shirt and stuffed everything into the beach bag I brought with me; because of my work schedule, I didn't get much time in the sun, so I was going to make the most of it, judgemental moms in kaftans be damned.

“I was starting to think you weren’t going to make it.”

Pushing my sunglasses up the bridge of my nose, I smiled and pulled Harry in for a hug.

“Yeah, Maddie wanted her polka dot swimsuit, but we couldn’t find it, so we had to scour the whole house for the stupid thing. But we made it.”

In the three months since Harry and I “started over,” we’d actually become good friends. We realized that aside from becoming parents at nineteen and twenty, we had a lot in common. Like me, Harry was incredibly hard working—though I often joked that I didn’t understand what he did the few times he tried to explain it to me—and he loved his son with everything he had. Over these last few months, he’d told me a little about his situation with his ex, but just enough to explain why he’d been late to pick Devon up from Maddison’s birthday party. I told him it wasn’t necessary, but I got the feeling there weren’t very many people he could talk to about it.

“We never did the whole custody thing when we got divorced. Taylor made it seem like I was lucky enough to be in his life at all. And at the time, I agreed with her, so I went along with everything she said.”

Family law wasn’t my specialty, but I knew enough about it to know that while custody battles could be sticky situations, sometimes they were necessary.

“I’m sorry,” I told him. “That must’ve been difficult.”

“It was alright at first. He stayed with me every other weekend and for Christmas, but then something happened, and it was like Taylor stopped caring. I came to her house to pick him up for the weekend once and he was in front of the television by himself while she was entertaining some guy by the pool.

“That was when I realized things needed to change. That and the day we were called into the principal’s office. When you told me Devon had been bullying Madison, I couldn’t believe it,” he said, shaking his head a little as he recalled the memory. “I knew that being a mother at twenty wasn’t exactly in her plans, but I never thought it would be this bad. So I’ve been trying to get full custody ever since.”

Hearing Harry’s words made me feel terrible for him and Devon. I never thought there would be a worse boat than Maddison’s dad wanting nothing to do with her and leaving us high and dry the second he found out I was pregnant, but now I wasn't so sure. One thing confused me though.

“But if she doesn’t want to be as involved, why not just let you have custody? Why all the trouble?” I realized that while Harry had opened up to me, he might not want to divulge everything all at once. We were friends, but I wasn’t sure we were that close. “Sorry, you don’t have to answer that if you don't want to.”

“It's fine,” he said, but remained quiet as he watched our kids run around the park we decided to meet at. “It’s more her family than Taylor herself. They’re, like, old money rich and very proud. When they found out that their daughter got pregnant from some poor bloke from a small village in England, they weren’t exactly thrilled. But to their credit, they took care of everything—the doctor visits, buying all the necessary stuff, they even bought us a house and set me up with a job at one of the companies they owned.”

“But?” I asked, knowing there was more to the story.

“But,” Harry continued. “Their one stipulation was that we get married. I was alone here in America, my family was on the other side of the world, and I didn’t have anywhere else to go, so it seemed like an okay deal at the time, but it was a disaster from the start.”

Harry didn’t need to tell me the rest to know why it was a disaster. She and Harry were two kids thrust into a life they weren't ready for. I knew the feeling well. I found myself feeling bad for Taylor too, even if she was dropping the ball as far as Devon was concerned. It wasn't easy being a mom in general. Being one while you were still in college was almost impossible. Still, the situation Harry and Devon were in now was not ideal. And whatever Harry’s ex was feeling shouldn’t have been projected onto her son.

“I’m sorry. This can’t be easy for you, especially when your family isn’t here,” I said. Harry hummed, and I got the feeling he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. “I know you probably have an excellent lawyer and everything,and it's not exactly my area of expertise, but if you ever want someone to look over anything with you, I’d be happy to.”

Harry turned his head to face me, something in his eyes I couldn't read. “Thanks. I appreciate it.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re here. And so is Devon, obviously,” Harry said now, adding the last bit as an afterthought. We never talked about how we’d slept together on Halloween or kissed in the restroom at the school’s Valentine's Day carnival, and for the most part, it was fine, but we did have our awkward moments.

I smiled and walked with Harry to where a couple of parents were standing around and talking. He grabbed me a juice pouch from the cooler on the ground and one for himself. He’d learned over time that while I liked to drink and have a good time, I normally didn’t do it when I had to drive Maddison anywhere. I never made him do the same, but Harry just smiled and poured himself a glass of apple juice and clinked his glass with mine the first time I told him about my little rule.

“Cheers,” he said, tapping his juice pouch with mine and taking a sip.

I stayed with Harry for a while, the two of us talking about our plans for this summer. Mine were small and not all that elaborate—Maddison’s dance camp in July and going home to see my parents a couple times. Harry told me he was still trying to finagle a trip for him and Devon to go to England and see his family, but with everything going on, he wasn't sure he could make it happen.

“It’s been so long since he’s seen his grandma, Y/n,” he said, but I could hear what he wasn’t saying. I myself wasn’t very close with my parents, but I couldn’t imagine being away from Javi or Sadie for so long. They were my support system, I needed them.

“Well,” I started, walking towards the deep end of the pool so we were alone but could still keep an eye on our kids. “You have a steady paying job, you’ve stepped up where your ex hasn’t, and you don’t live in a total bachelor pad as far as I can tell.”

“Hey,” Harry said, pushing my shoulder. I laughed and shoved him back.

“What I’m trying to say is that you’re making all the right moves. The judge and the social worker will see that. Just try not to make any drastic, life-altering decisions until after you’ve won your case.”

Harry was quiet for a moment while he considered my words. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and pulled me in close. “Thank you.”

I closed my eyes and smiled, patting him on the knee. When I opened them again, I noticed a couple of the moms at the other end of the pool eyeing us. None of them were ever explicitly rude to me, but I could tell they didn’t like the way I seemed to be closer to Harry than they ever would be. Their obsession with him really put me off, and after spending more time with him, I knew that Harry was uncomfortable with it too, he was just too much of a gentleman to turn them away. I took that mantle upon myself when I could, pulling him away from conversations and diverting his attention from these women. Hopefully he would get a reprieve for a few months until school started back up again.

Still, I often found their narrowed eyes to be unsettling, especially when Harry and I were talking about something serious. Leaning away from him a little, I brought my arms up and with all my might, I pushed him into the pool.

Harry fell in with a yelp and a splash, causing the kids at the shallower end to look over. I quickly got up from my spot sitting at the edge of the pool as I heard fits of giggles erupting from the kids, knowing that Harry would be quick to retaliate. Walking past all the parents, I slipped inside the house in search of a bathroom. When I stepped out of the bathroom and closed the door behind me, patting dry my hands on my shorts, I ran into Michael.

“There you are,” he said, a smile on his face.

I guess as far as middle-aged dads went, Michael was attractive. He was tall and had what looked like red hair that had slowly lightened with time. He was incredibly nice, always stopping to say hello as he dropped off his daughter and never once looking like he judged me for having a seven year old at my age.

“Here I am,” I said, smiling at him as I walked towards the backyard where everyone else was.

Before I could get very far, Michael placed a hand on my arm. “Did you get a tour of the house yet?”

When I shook my head at him, he pulled me in the opposite direction. Not wanting to be impolite, I followed. I half paid attention as he explained things to me like where this painting came from, or what photographer he hired for that family portrait. At the base of his staircase, he stopped, leaning an arm against the banister. It felt a little odd that we were talking away from everyone else, and the hand he still had on my arm felt a little too friendly for my taste. It never occurred to me that Michael might have had some sort of attraction towards me, but I was usually so caught up in Maddison’s dance classes and cases at work that I hardly paid those things any mind anymore, especially after the fiasco with Harry.

“I should probably get back to watching Maddison,” I said lightly, stepping back and away from Michael. He didn't seem phased by my words, just stepped even closer to me than before.

“Come on, Y/n,” he said, his voice low. I had a feeling he was going for sexy, but it didn't come off that way at all. I felt like I was being chided by some kind of father figure. Barf. “You can't expect me to ignore this thing between us. Not when you look like that.”

I felt like thousands of tiny insects were crawling over my body as he looked me up and down, his gaze lingering on my chest. I felt utterly exposed. Bile rose in my throat as Michael raised a hand like he was going to caress my face or tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. I choked it down and raised my hand to catch his wrist before he could touch me and squeezed hard enough for him to wince.

“I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about,” I said to him, trying to ignore the way my voice quivered. “But I would think very carefully about your next move.”

Michael had the audacity to smile at me, and it only made my skin crawl even more. He tried to step closer to me, tried leaning in, but I stepped on his foot and hastily backed away from him. I stumbled back into the bathroom and locked it, trying to catch my breath and steady the rapid beating of my heart. I waited for the sound of Michael's footsteps to pass by before opening the door again, taking one last deep breath as I stepped out.

Finding my way outside where everyone was still having a good time, I started collecting my things. The laughter, the music, and the conversation coming from all directions blended together like white noise buzzing in my ears as I put my shirt back on. I felt a lump form in the back of my throat, but I ignored it to look for Maddison in the sea of bobbing heads in the pool.

“Maddie—” I tried to say, but my voice faltered. Taking a breath, I tried again. “Maddison!”

She looked over to me, and seeing the bright smile on her face brought me some comfort amidst the feeling of utter disgust Michael’s actions brought me. I didn't want to interrupt her fun, but I couldn't stay. I could make it up to her somehow, I just had to leave. “Levántase. Nos vamos.”

I didn't always speak Spanish to Maddison in public, usually just around the house, but it came in handy when I didn't want the people around me to know what I was saying.

Maddie looked upset at having her fun cut short, but she didn't question it. She slowly waded to the steps at the shallowest end of the pool and got out, trudging over to me, her little shoulders slumped and feet making wet footprints on the concrete.

“Rápido, por favor,” I said, slipping a towel over her shoulders. She nodded, the braids I did for her a couple days ago swinging as she moved. As I helped her get into the shirt she was wearing when we got here, I heard the pitter pattering of feet on concrete coming towards us.

“Miss Y/l/n, can Maddie stay longer, pleeease?”

Looking up, I smiled at Devon. While watching Maddison today, I noticed that most of the time it was just the two of them doing their own thing. It made me happy to see them becoming such close friends, and I thought it was adorable the way he asked if Maddie could stay, but I couldn't, and I didn't feel comfortable leaving her here without me.

“We can't, but we'll definitely have a beach day soon. How does that sound?” Devon and Maddison nodded enthusiastically at my suggestion, and I stood up from where I was kneeling in front of them. Maddie and I started saying goodbye when Harry walked over.

“Going so soon?” he asked. He'd taken off the black linen button up he had been wearing, most likely letting it dry somewhere. Now he was just in a pair of white shorts, his tattoos stark black in the hot summer sun.

I smiled weakly at him, trying not to appear as freaked out as I felt. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Michael walk over to where his wife was sitting at one of the patio tables. The disgust I felt earlier returned, and I hoisted my bag over my shoulder. “Yeah, um, something came up at work, so I—we have to go.”

Harry immediately knew something was wrong, I could see the realization on his face. But I didn't want questions, and I didn't want his sympathy right now. I just wanted to leave.

“Well then I guess we're out of here too, little man,” Harry said, ruffling Devon's hair. “Why don't I take Maddie and Devon out for ice cream while you handle work?”

“No, really, that's not necessary—” I started to protest, but Harry cut me off.

“Fear not, Y/n. I will have the miscreants home at a decent hour.” Looking in his eyes, I saw the silent message in them. Go take care of you. I got this. Loosening a breath, I nodded, and Maddie and Devon cheered.

Walking over to where all the other parents were, I thanked Michael's wife for having us, ignoring Michael himself with everything I had. She gave me a big smile and said that Maddie and I were welcome anytime. Her kindness made me feel sick, and I was suddenly grateful that Harry was taking Maddison for a little bit so I could freak out without worrying her. Michael had a wife. And there he was, trying to make a pass at me while she was just outside. I didn't pretend to know what their life was like when people weren't around, but she seemed wonderful. I didn't want to get in the way of that, not to mention I didn't see Michael like that at all. With shaking hands, I walked with Harry, Maddie, and Devon outside.

When we got to Harry's car, I kneeled down to give Madison a kiss. “Be on your very best behavior, okay? Remember to say please and thank you, and you listen to Mr. Styles when he tells you to do something.”

Maddie nodded, and I pulled her in for a hug. It was probably more intense than what the situation called for, but having her in my arms brought me comfort like nothing else did. I squeezed her until she started squirming, standing up and fishing my keys out of my bag.

“Thank you,” I told Harry earnestly. Getting my wallet, I pulled a couple bills out to pay for Maddison's ice cream, but he waved me off.

“Don’t worry about it,” he said. Knowing him, I knew that this was nonnegotiable, so I put the money back in my wallet. Turning his head around a bit, he saw that Devon and Maddison were far enough where he could whisper to me. “Is everything okay?”

I nodded, even though everything was not okay. “Yep. Everything's just fine. Don't keep her out too late, please.”

I could tell Harry wasn't buying my nonchalance, but he didn't press the issue any further. Once they all got in his car, I started walking to mine. Now that I was alone, the last twenty minutes started to take its toll on me in full. Part of me felt like an idiot for not seeing the signs that Michael felt the way that he did, but we’d never had more than friendly conversation. He was a nice guy who had a daughter that was in the same class as mine, never did I ever think of him in the way he obviously saw me. Not to mention the fact that he had a wife and was considerably older than me. I felt dirty. Even though nothing really happened, I felt like I could still feel his eyes as he looked me over, like I was his for the taking.

As I drove home, my thoughts started to have a mind of their own. Did I lead him on somehow? Was this my fault? I tried to think back to any and all interactions with Michael I could recall, but I didn’t think there was a time where I encouraged his behavior today. When I got home, the house was empty and dark. With Javi out at work and Maddie with Devon and Harry, I had the whole house to myself. While I appreciated Harry taking Maddison out, I kind of wished she was here to distract me from this gross feeling that I couldn’t shake. With my skin still crawling from Michael’s gaze, I decided to hop in the shower. I threw my hair up into a bun and stepped in, trying to wash away today.

And the problem with that was, outside of Michael’s advances, I was actually having a good time. I was happily watching Maddie play with Devon and her other classmates while sipping on juice pouches with Harry. Now any time I would think back on this day, it would leave a bad taste in my mouth.

I got out of the shower feeling a little better, more tired than anything, but I didn’t want to be asleep when Harry dropped Maddison off, so I took a couple of my files from my bedroom to the couch to work on while I had a movie playing in the background. My eyes danced over case files without really paying attention to them, but after about half an hour my mind started to shove thoughts about this afternoon away and focus on the work in front of me. Being upset over what happened today wasn’t going to change anything. Maddie didn’t need a frantic mom, she needed a strong one, and the people I helped at the office needed that from me too.

A while later I was on a roll, taking notes and writing down reminders of phone calls I needed to make later this week. With my highlighter in my mouth and a case file open on my lap, the door opened. “I’m home, Mommy!”

With my highlighter still clutched between my teeth, my head turned to where Maddison, Devon, and Harry walked through the entryway of the house. Removing my file from my lap and capping my highlighter, I stood up to greet everyone. “Hi, mija, did you have fun?”

Maddie nodded and gave me a hug and a kiss before taking Devon outside to play in the backyard, leaving me and Harry alone in the living room. Harry raised two paper bags in his hand. “I felt bad for leaving you with a sugar-crazed kid, so I brought dinner. Hope that’s okay.”

“You didn’t have to do that,” I told him, but took the bags from him anyway and set them down on the kitchen counter. Deciding to let our kids play for a little bit before sitting down to eat, I brought Harry over to where I was sitting on the couch a couple minutes ago.

He sat on one side, and I sat on the complete opposite, drawing my knees up to my chest. Harry grinned a little as he teased his bottom lip between his fingers. “Well, it was more for me, really. I was quite hungry.”

I laughed quietly with Harry, watching as his eyes crinkled at the sight of my smile. He was still in his clothes from the pool party, his black button up looking a little wrinkly from getting wet earlier. One thing I noticed that he wasn’t wearing before was a tiny little clip that held up some of his hair away from his face. I found it cute the way it created a little tuft of hair on the top of his head, a little surprising that he owned a hair clip at all, but cute all the same.

“What happened today?” he asked me, making my eyes trail from his hair to his face. Harry looked passive, like he was trying to appear casual, but I could see little traces of concern in his features.

I didn’t answer for a moment, playing with the hem of my shirt as I thought about what I wanted to say. Right now, this afternoon was behind me; I had all of summer to spend with my daughter and away from the parents at her school, Michael included. It was so early into summer that I didn’t want this one incident to put a damper on our two months of freedom. Well, Maddison’s two months, I still had to work, but we were going to make the most of it.

I was also wary of telling Harry about this at all. Anytime I talked about my “friendship” with Michael, he always got moody. He would cross his arms like a little kid and try to change the subject. I wasn’t sure if Harry was just territorial of his friends by nature, or if he was jealous, but I told myself it was the former, mostly because nothing about my interactions with Michael or how I spoke about him indicated I was interested.

Quietly, but not weakly, I spoke to Harry. “Nothing really, Michael was just being an ass, and I didn’t want to be there anymore.”

Harry’s reaction was almost instantaneous. His face became angry, morphing into something I hadn’t seen before, not even when Principal Stevens told him Maddie punched Devon. I wasn’t necessarily worried about Harry’s reaction when I told him, but now I wondered if I should’ve said anything at all. He’d proven himself to be a good friend and person in general, but I didn’t need him to fight my battles for me. I could handle Michael on my own.

“I handled it, so let’s not make a big deal out of it, okay?” I told him, causing his face to soften a little. Harry inched forward carefully, almost like he knew that Michael had done more than just say something to me, even if I didn’t tell him that.

He offered his hand out to me, a question in his eyes. I took it, letting the warmth of his fingers encase mine. What I didn’t expect was to be pulled into his chest. Harry held me close, a little awkwardly because of how I was sitting before, but it still felt nice. His chin rested on top of my head as his hands rubbed soft circles into my back. I couldn’t help the small smile that split my face. Harry really did turn out to be a good friend.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.

“Why? You didn’t do anything,” I said, a little confused. Harry wasn’t even there when it happened. “And it’s not like you’re my boyfriend or anything. There wasn’t much you could do.”

I don’t know why I said it. It was a stupid thing to say, especially when Harry was being incredibly kind and comforting. I guess I hadn’t put the frustrations I felt earlier completely behind me. I felt Harry stiffen a little against me, and I immediately felt awful. Pulling away from his embrace, I opened my mouth to apologize, but Harry was already standing up from the couch. Still, I tried anyway.

“Harry, that came out wrong, I’m sorry—”

“No, you’re right, I’m not.” He didn’t turn around, just kept on walking towards the kitchen counter to take out the food he’d brought over.

Sighing, I stood up and followed him into the kitchen. There were things we never talked about since we’d become friends, our feelings for each other being the main one. Despite my best efforts, I really liked him, but I really didn’t want to. My life was so hectic and things were good between us as friends, I didn’t see the need to complicate things further. But that didn’t change the fact that I found him endearing and had grown to love his collection of colorful cardigans and sweaters, or that I would catch him staring at me when he thought I wasn’t looking. It was a weird place to be in, but most days we ignored it, only now I wasn’t so sure how long we were going to be able to do that.

Leaning against the counter, I watched him pull to-go boxes out of the paper bags. I was relieved that he stayed because it meant he wasn’t super pissed at me. He would’ve been gone already if he was. Coming around to where he was standing, I wrapped my arms around his torso. “I’m sorry.”

I felt Harry take a deep breath, my arms rising and falling a little as he inhaled and exhaled. “It’s fine.”

“See, you say that, but then I hear you say it and I see the look on your face, which tells me it’s not,” I said, and maybe I was poking around somewhere I maybe shouldn’t have, but I wanted to get to the bottom of this once and for all.

I removed my arms from his waist so he could move around the kitchen counter, placing sushi pieces on paper plates from my cupboard. I raised an eyebrow at his choice of giving sushi to two seven year olds, but didn’t question it. Harry was a pretty down to earth guy, but he had expensive tastes.

Taking his clip out of his hair, he ran a hand through it and put it back in its place. “I don’t know what you want me to say, Y/n.”

“The truth, preferably,” I said, chancing a little humor.

He rolled his eyes at me, but kept talking anyway. “See, you say that, but I don’t think you really want to hear what I have to say.”

His words scared me a little, but I made this bed, now I had to lie in it. “Try me.”

Harry took another deep breath, his fingers pulling at the paper casing of a set of chopsticks. “I like you. A lot, actually, but you’re afraid of change and letting people in, so I’ve settled for being your friend, which is fine, I just…it’s just difficult to see you get upset over assholes like Michael when—when, you know, I’m here.”

I’d asked for honesty, and that’s what I got. I had an idea that Harry’s feelings went beyond the scope of friendship, but I didn’t know how much. I also took offense to what he said about me, but that was mostly because he was pretty spot on. He was right to say that I didn’t like change and had a hard time letting people in, but history had made me that way, and I was having a hard time changing that.

“Harry,” I said, reaching to grab his hand. He pulled away to continue setting up dinner, but I knew there was more intention behind it than that. It hurt more than I liked to admit to see him blatantly refuse my touch, but I figured it was probably deserved. “I didn’t—I didn’t realize how much…”

“I think about you constantly,” he admitted. He kept his head down as he folded and unfolded napkins, but I could see the nervous tremor in his hands. “I think about the way you laugh at my jokes when no one else does, I think about how good you are to Maddison and how you would do anything for her to make her happy, and I see how much Devon likes you, despite the fact that he’s never taken to strangers so easily before.

“But mostly, I think about that night months ago,” Harry mumbled, like it was a secret. He didn’t need to say which night he was talking about. I knew. “The perfume you wore could’ve gotten me drunk because it was so intoxicating, that red bra-thing you had on was absolutely sinful.”

Harry finally stopped playing with the napkins and walked over to where I was rooted to the floor in the kitchen. Normally I would’ve snorted at him saying “bra-thing,” but I was stunned into silence.

“I think about how soft your hair was in my hands, how soft you were underneath me, on top of me, how you whispered my name like a prayer.” Harry’s lips ghosted the top of my cheekbone, his hands dancing along my shoulders. I felt hot and cold all at once, goosebumps rising underneath the fabric of my shirt. “I think about how right that night felt. Did you feel it too, Y/n? Do you still think of me?”

Lost in the feeling of his closeness, I nodded, revealing the one thing I’d been trying to ignore in order to maintain the friendship we had. I thought about him too, more than he could ever know, but it wasn’t so simple. We had young kids, I shared a bedroom with Maddison, and Harry was struggling to get custody of Devon. There was just too much going on right now, adding a budding relationship to the mix would only add to that.

Harry’s lips brushed over mine, the barest touch sending sparks shooting up my spine. My body involuntarily moved forward to meet his, the way his nose barely brushed against my cheek almost too much, that one bit of contact making me weak in the knees. My movements became hasty and rushed, but Harry remained languid, his lips pressing against mine and focusing on my bottom lip in a way that had my head spinning. My hands were everywhere, but his left remained by his side, his right lightly cupped against my jaw. It was like he was putting all the power in my hands, how far we took this kiss was up to me.

Craving his touch in a way that was a little embarrassing, I took his hands in mine and brought them to my waist and flattened them against where my hips curved. My movements spurred Harry into action, his hands acting on their own as they moved up and down my sides and his lips moving with more purpose as they opened mine, his tongue sliding against my own with a precision that had me melting in his hands. I fisted his black shirt, then reached underneath the unbuttoned bit to lay my hands flush against the smooth skin of his chest. He was impossibly warm, and I could feel the rumbling of his groan as my hands wandered, spurring me on to travel further.

With great difficulty, I detached my lips from his to press lazy kisses to the base of his throat, smiling against him as I felt him take a shuddering breath. I wasn’t sure that taking things between us further was the best idea, but his kiss and gentle touch made me want to try anyway. Maybe down the line, I would come to regret my choice, but I felt like I might come to regret not trying even more. As I kissed along his neck, though, I could still feel some lingering tension where his shoulders rested underneath my hands, like he was unsure of my intentions right now.

“I think about you too,” I whispered as I placed a kiss to where his ear met his jaw. Harry shook his head slightly.

“Don’t,” he breathed. “Don’t say that unless you mean it. Please.”

Pulling away, I brought my hands up to either side of his face. He looked hopeful and ready to face rejection at the same time. Rubbing my thumb along his cheekbone, I kissed his face.

“I like you,” I whispered, kissing one brow. “And I think about you constantly too.” His other brow. “I think about these beautiful eyes of yours.” A kiss to each of his eyelids. “And I think about your smile.” A kiss to the corner of his mouth. “And that dimple that has no right being as cute as it is.” Harry smiled, and I kissed the indentation in his cheek. “That’s the one.”

I moved so that we were nose to nose, my hands still caressing his face. “I’m cautious because my life runs on a very delicate balance, and just one small change could set everything off course.”

Harry nodded, his shoulders slumping the slightest bit, but I pressed a kiss to his forehead. “But I haven’t felt like this for anyone… ever, I don’t think, despite how much you irritate me.”

He chuckled and I smiled at him, butterflies taking flight in my stomach. “What are you saying?”

Pursing my lips, I took his hands in mine. “Let’s just take things slow, see where life takes us this summer.”

It was imperative that I stressed the importance of going slow. Maddison and I were a package deal, and I knew Harry and Devon were the same way. Harry had a lot going on in his personal life, and I didn’t want to get in the way of that. And for the sake of everyone involved, I thought it was best to just take our time. We knew that we both liked each other, and for now, that was enough.

Harry grinned, the same smug one that I’ve had a love-hate relationship with over the last few months. I asked him what had him smiling that way, and it just made him grin even more. “You like me. Like, you like me like me.”

“What are you, twelve?” I asked, taking my hands out of his. I backed away from him and went towards the backyard to call Devon and Maddison inside. Halfway there, I felt a hand on my shoulder spin me around, and before I could even take a breath, Harry’s lips were on mine again. This kiss felt different from before, more hungry and needy than the last, and I could feel the message in it as his tongue tangled with mine. I’m not a boy, he seemed to say. And I won’t let you forget it.

“Alright, alright, I get it. Now can we please feed our children? Remember them? Mine punched yours in the face once?”

Harry tipped his head back, as if he just remembered Devon. “Right, them. I don’t suppose we can just put some kibble and water into bowls and we can have the night all to ourselves?”

I shook my head at him, but talking about Maddie and Devon made me think about how they came into play. I was very conscious of Maddison and what she knew and didn’t know about my meager (until now, I guess) relationships. Maddie already knew Harry, and I didn’t know how to tread this unfamiliar ground.

“What do we tell them?” I asked, my voice taking on a serious tone.

“Well, what do you want to tell them?” He replied, and I opened my mouth to tell him that that was a non-answer, but he spoke again. “And before you say something about how I’m passing this off to you, I just genuinely want to know how you feel. This is important to me too.”

It was a little unsettling the way he seemed to know me as well as he did, but he was my friend, and had become quite good at reading me, despite my efforts from trying to keep him from doing so. But if he wanted the truth, I’d give it to him, the same way he had been open and honest with me. “I don’t think we should say anything. Not yet.”

“I agree,” he said. “And I’m not just saying that. I mean it. I think it’s the right thing to do for now.”

I felt relief wash over me, not even realizing that I was worried he wouldn’t agree with me. It was important for me to see if we were serious about this before saying anything to Maddison. “Okay, so, that means you have to let go of me now.”

Harry frowned, pulling me in for another kiss. “I’ll try to keep my longing glances to a minimum.”

“Ha!” I laughed at his antics. I’d seen a lot of sides to Harry over the last few months, and I wondered what he would be like in a relationship. “Please do, now let’s eat.”

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

july

“Mommy, why didn’t you tell Grandma and Grandpa about Harry?”

In a panic, I whipped my head around to where Maddison was sitting in the backseat. “What are you talking about, kiddo?”

After a month of doing whatever we were doing, Harry and I had yet to say anything to Maddie or Devon. It was still new, and with our constantly conflicting schedules, we’d only gone on a couple dates, if you could call them that. We went out for lunch during work breaks a few times and went out for drinks once when Javi could watch Maddie and Harry’s ex had Devon for the night. It didn’t end the way Halloween did because I had to get Maddison to ballet class early the next morning and then haul my ass to work, but Harry didn’t seem to mind, content to keep taking it day by day.

We were careful around our kids, though. Harry never held my hand while we took them to the park or when we went over to his house for playdates. I didn’t think either of them had caught on, but now I wasn’t so sure, and the constant questioning from my parents didn’t help.

“So, Y/n, anyone new in your life?” my mother asked.

It was the Fourth of July, and Javi, Maddison, and I were at my parents’ house for the holiday. This wasn’t the first time my mother had asked me about my dating life, but this time around, the questions felt more frequent, more incessant. There were many reasons I hardly went home anymore, and while her questions weren’t at the top of the list, they were definitely on there somewhere.

“No, Mom, there isn’t. It’s just me and Maddie against the world right now, isn’t that right, mija?” I said the last part to Maddison, who happily licked on a red and orange popsicle.

She nodded around her popsicle, the edges of her mouth red from her messy eating. My mother, however, didn’t look as pleased by my answer. “You’re getting a little old, don’t you think? Time’s ticking, Y/n.”

“Rosie, that’s enough,” my dad chided, placing a hand on her arm.

“It’s fine, Dad,” I told him. “If that’s how she feels, that’s how she feels. That doesn’t mean I have to listen.”

My mother rolled her eyes. “Don’t be so cross, Y/n. You’re always so defensive with me.”

“Because you’re never satisfied with what I’m doing. I could win a case in the Supreme Court and you would still complain that I don’t have a husband.”

My mom set her glass down with more force than was necessary. Before things could really get ugly, though, my brother returned from where he had gone into the house for a moment.

Ah yes, the favorite child. I loved my brother to death, but there was clear favoritism in our family. I knew it had to do with the fact that I had a child at twenty and he didn’t, but I didn’t really care, I had let that go a while ago. I didn’t need my parents’ approval to be successful or happy.

The rest of the night was tense, but there weren’t any more hiccups or squabbles. I tried not to fight with my parents in front of Maddison, but sometimes my mother really brought it out of me. Looking at my daughter now as I drove her home from dance camp, I wondered what the hell she was talking about.

“Isn’t Harry your boyfriend?” Maddie asked, and I nearly pressed my foot on the breaks.

My eyes flicked to my daughter in the rearview mirror. She didn’t look particularly upset, just as curious as always. “What makes you say that, Maddison?”

“He always stares at you while Devon and I are playing. And you have a heart emoji next to his name in your phone.”

I sighed, pulling into the driveway and turning the car off. Getting out, I opened the backseat and grabbed Maddie’s dance bag. She unbuckled her seatbelt and walked up the front steps with me. “You’re too smart for your own good, you know that?”

Maddie giggled and did a pirouette into the kitchen. “And a great dancer.”

“Oh, that goes without question.”

We hung out in the kitchen together as I fixed her up a sandwich for lunch, and I thought about how I wanted to address Harry and me. Maddison obviously picked up on cues and subtleties more than I gave her credit for. What I didn’t know was how she was really feeling about what I clearly had been trying to keep from her for the last month.

I played some music for us while I made her lunch and put Maddie to work making her get out the peanut butter and jelly, spinning her around the kitchen every now and then. When we finished, I sat down with her at the kitchen table while she munched on her sandwich. Opening up my phone, I sent a quick text to Harry, sighing when I saw the little green heart next to his name. I wasn’t even the one to do that, he was, and now it had come back to bite us in the ass. I asked him if we could talk later or the next time he had a moment. He’d finally managed to get him and Devon to England for two weeks. We’d spoken since, obviously, but it was limited because of the time difference. Switching my phone off, I looked over at Maddie.

“So, I know you think Harry is my boyfriend, but he’s just a really good friend.” Harry and I hadn’t put labels on anything yet, and I had no plans on doing so for the time being. This was the moment I wanted to avoid so much, but it had snuck up on me anyway, despite my best efforts.

“Oh,” Maddie said, licking a little stray peanut butter from her thumb. “Well, does he know that?”

Now that is something I didn't expect. “What do you mean?”

Maddison tilted her head, the little ballerina bun that took an arm and a leg to perfect each morning this week listing to one side. “I don’t know. I just think he really likes you. Devon does too.”

She said it so simply, the only way a seven year old could. In her mind, I suppose it was that easy, but in reality, I knew there was a lot more to consider. These past few weeks with Harry had been great, and I hoped that the coming weeks would also be great, but I still felt like I was walking on a tightrope with this budding relationship. Leaning over, I peppered Maddie’s cheeks with kisses.

“No, Mommy! No more kisses!” she shouted, but I didn’t stop, tickling her sides too.

I finally stopped after a few seconds, pulling her up to her feet. “Okay, kiddo, let’s get you showered and then we can figure out what we’re gonna do the rest of the day.”

I helped Maddie take her shower and get her dressed in more comfortable clothes. We spent the rest of the day around the house, me working and Maddison playing in the living room with her mix of dolls and action figures. It was a mellow summer evening for us. Javi came home early and we all watched a movie on the couch together, Maddie falling asleep on my shoulder halfway through. Javi turned in early and carried Maddison to bed while I stayed on the couch to work a little more and text Sadie in between shuffling documents. Like Harry and Devon, she was also on vacation, so it really was just me and Maddison against the world right now.

I also thought about the conversation I had with Maddie today. I wasn’t sure why I expected her to scream and shout and be completely against the idea of me and Harry together, but I did. Maddie had always been a pretty chill kid, and she liked Harry whenever we got together. I think part of me maybe hoped she would hate us together so I could have an excuse to end things if things went south between Harry and me, like a back door or something. I liked Harry, and I liked the time we spent alone together outside of a playdate with our kids, so I didn’t know why I had a self-sabotaging loophole in the back of my mind. We never really finished our conversation at lunch, but from what I could tell, Maddie was unbothered by Harry and I being more than friends. This is a good thing, I told myself, hoping that saying it over and over in my head would make me believe it.

As my thoughts took me away from my work, my phone rang. Speak of the devil. I nearly forgot that I asked to talk to him earlier. Holding my phone up in front of me, I blew a curl out of my face and answered the phone. “Hey. It’s a little early over there, isn’t—Oh, hello.”

Looking at my phone screen, I saw that it was not Harry looking back at me, nor was it Devon, who sometimes answered Harry’s phone when I called. It was a middle aged woman, her hair dark and eyes a similar shape to Harry’s. I had the urge to hang up because I was ninety nine percent sure that this was his mom, but I managed to control myself.

“Oh, she’s just gorgeous, isn’t she, Harry,” the woman said, and now I really wanted to hang up the phone. She must’ve seen the frantic look in my eyes because she slowly backpedaled. “Heavens, I’ve scared her. Please forgive me, I sometimes forget to shut my mouth. I’ve just heard so much about you.”

I could tell Harry’s mom was trying to make me feel better, but I only felt more flustered. Two days ago, I told my mom that there was no one in my life at the moment, and here was Harry’s mother, talking to me like we were long time friends. Outside my view of the camera, I could hear Harry’s muffled voice.

“Mum, did you call Y/n?” His voice sounded surprised and exasperated at the same time, his face matching it when he popped onto the screen. Reading the expression on my face, Harry worried his lip between his fingers. “I just want you to know that I didn’t say a word to her. She figured it out on her own.”

I was speechless. I thought I was going to talk to Harry about how his day went, the tap dance Maddie learned today, and the fact that Maddison seemed to put together that there was something going on between us. Meeting his mom while I was in my pajamas wasn’t part of that plan. Something about this situation felt unsettling to me. A lot of things didn’t go to plan today, and this was just the icing on the cake.

Forcing a yawn behind my hand, I blinked at the screen. “I was actually just about to go to bed. But I would love to talk later?”

I didn’t want to sound like a complete bitch, but I was tired, and I didn’t like being put on the spot. Harry’s mother seemed to understand, apologizing for keeping me up and saying how excited she was to speak to me another time. Harry, on the other hand, saw right through me. He asked his mom to let him say goodbye alone, and then it was just the two of us.

“You’re upset,” he said the minute we were alone. I shook my head, not wanting to talk about it to him anymore.

“No, I told you, I’m just tired,” I said, but I could tell Harry didn’t buy it at all.

He rubbed a hand across the slight stubble growing on his face. “I’m sorry about my mum. She can be a little overbearing.”

I nodded, but my heart wasn’t in having this conversation. He knew it, I knew it, but neither of us hung up the phone. I missed his stupid face too much. “I miss you.”

His face broke out into a smile, but he hid it behind his hand. “I’ve missed you too. Absolutely dreadful not seeing you and Maddison every day.”

My cheeks warmed, a small smile of my own forming on my lips. I heard Harry mumble, there she is, and it only made my cheeks heat up even more. The truth was, I knew that Harry wasn’t the reason for my sudden change in mood. In fact, he was in the same boat as I was.

“Now, are you going to tell me what’s got you feeling so blue?”

I shook my head, but it was playful. He grinned a little when he saw that I wasn’t as icy as I was a few minutes ago. He kept jokingly needling me for information about my day, and I kept my mouth shut for a little bit, but I eventually broke the news to him. “Maddie knows too. She figured it out.”

Harry was quiet for a few seconds, dumbstruck. “Wow,” he breathed. “We suck at keeping secrets.”

That made me laugh. “Me? Maddie said she caught you staring at me all the time. And you said your mom figured it out when you got home.”

“Alright, so I’m terrible at keeping secrets,” he said, laughter still in his voice. Sobering up, he looked at me with an earnest eye. “Are you okay with that?”

“I mean, it’s not ideal, but she took it better than I thought, so,” I told him, my voice trailing off. At this point, there wasn't anything I could do about it, and Maddie’s positive reaction should’ve had me doing cartwheels around the house instead of moping to Harry. Maybe I was just tired. “Is this okay? I know this means you might have to have a talk with Devon sooner than expected.”

This was also an issue that itched the back of my mind. I liked taking things slow, and I knew Harry did too. Our plans for seeing how things went flew out the window now that our kids knew, or would know in Devon’s case. Harry also had a lot going on in his personal life. He was still battling for full custody of Devon, and by the looks of it, it was going to be ugly to the very end. I didn’t want to be cause for distraction or unnecessary drama in his life.

“Erm,” he started. “Yeah, I mean, I wished I could’ve planned or prepared for it better, but I don’t think it'll be too bad. He’s grown quite fond of you.”

I felt my face flush again at the compliment. Most of my time spent with Devon was when he and Maddie were on a playdate, but I always went out of my way to ask how he was doing or what he was up to that week. Every time I saw him, I thought of how he looked when he got dropped off for Maddison’s birthday party, and how I never wanted him to look as sad as he did that day. He might have been a punk to my daughter at the beginning of the school year, but the more Maddie and I got to know him, the more I realized how much of a lover he was. He was a sweet boy, and I cared about him as much as I did Harry.

Nodding at the camera, I replied to Harry. “Well, the feeling’s mutual. Now tell me how your mom found out about me.”

The camera quality was bad, but I could see a little pink on Harry’s cheeks. Now that I talked to him about it, I didn’t mind as much that more people knew, I just didn’t like being ambushed. He told me that he didn’t breathe a word to his mom, his mum, he said, but that when they got to her house, she could tell something was different.

It was funny to listen to him explain his mother’s odd sixth sense for sussing out personal information from Harry because I was in a similar situation and my mother had no clue about my life or who was in it outside Javi and Maddison. Not that I cared, I preferred that my mother knew nothing about my personal life, especially where Harry was concerned. Things were good because they were easy. We didn’t see each other as much as we might’ve liked, but there weren’t any expectations right now. It was like we were in a delicate bubble floating through the sky, and my mother was the needle that would pop it, causing Harry and me to scramble for purchase where we could find it before we hit the ground.

“And then of course Devon mentioned you and Maddison, and that pretty much told her everything she needed to know,” Harry said, pulling me from my thoughts. I stayed quiet, thinking. I’m sure Harry's mom was a wonderful person and nothing like mine, but I couldn’t help but think that this was somehow going to change the dynamic of our relationship, solidify it more than I was ready to right now. Harry and I had only been seeing each other for about a month, and to me, that wasn’t a lot of time. Harry spoke again, trying to comfort me, but only making my mind scramble even more. “I’ll talk to her today, explain that we’re not really that serious right now.”

I tried not to visibly cringe. We’re not really that serious. As it usually goes with taking things slow, we decided not to label what we were doing just yet, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t serious about Harry. I wouldn’t have said yes to giving us a try if I wasn’t. And I wasn’t seeing anyone else right now either. I got that Harry was trying to ease my mind, but he only made me feel like what we were doing wasn’t important to him.

What’s his mom going to think when he tells her that? I thought. She’s going to think I'm some girl only out for a good time or something equally horrible. I didn’t really want Harry’s mom to know about us in the first place, but now that she did, I didn’t want her to think ill of me.

My mood was worsening, and I didn’t want Harry to see it. I just needed to go to bed and maybe talk to him later. “Tell her whatever you want, Harry. It's late, so I should probably get to bed.”

His face, which had been calm until this point, became concerned. “Did I say something? Don’t just leave, Y/n, let’s talk about this—”

His voice, still calm but steadily becoming irritated seemed to grate on my nerves even more. “I’ll talk to you later. Good night, Harry.”

I hung up the phone and climbed into bed with Maddie, rubbing a thumb across her cheek. Shutting my eyes, I tried to go to sleep, but it would be a while before I actually did.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

...

so miss girl is a little dramatic, but 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️ i am too low-key. anyway, next part should be up in the next few days!

#harry styles #harry styles au #single mom!reader #single dad!harry #harry styles blurb #harry styles x reader #harry styles imagine #harry styles fanfic #harry styles oneshot #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles x you #harry styles fluff #harry styles writing #harry styles angst #harry styles one shot #harry styles fic

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fensherohair · 5 months

Text

The Marauders & The Metamorphic Witch Part 9

Words: 1.9k Warning: None although mentions of dating Pronouns: She/Her

Christmas was drawing closer; the many students seemed to be in a constant buzz of excitement. Many spoke about their plans, discussing if they would be going home for the holidays or staying within the walls of the castle. The castle itself had been decorated, and the great hall had several trees around the side, with a larger one behind the professor's area at the back of the hall, especially decorated by the professors. The candles floating in the hall had holly wrapped around the base, with snow falling from the cloud sky, hiding the arched ceiling. Even the grand staircase had been decorated. With tinsel lining the many moving staircases, some with sparkling baubles, too. The pictures had Christmas trees with them or something Christmas-related, and a few even singing Christmas songs.

Of course, the common rooms hadn't escaped the Christmas makeover. Each had a tree in the corner near the fire. Decorated in the house colors with Hogwarts emblem baubles here and there. Other decorations had also appeared around each common area, seemingly overnight. The first-year students always seemed to be amazed, whereas the older ones grinned at the reminder Christmas was coming. Every now and again, mistletoe would appear in a doorway or above a random area where students gathered. However, the Scottish weather had likely already reminded them the holidays drew closer, with the thick snowfall beginning in November and seeming to be constant. Until the ice and snow created a winter wonderland out of the castle grounds, even the great lake had frozen over.

"Are any of you staying here for Christmas?" asked Isolde, a soft smile gracing her lips as she remembered her parents informing both her and Allegra they would be staying at the castle this year. Their loving parents had finally got around to going on the romantic getaway they'd always talked about doing. Isolde had accepted it without much fuss, instead looking forward to exploring the castle when it was almost empty and getting to experience something new. Allegra, on the other hand, had written a harsh letter back to their parents, demanding they either change their plans or allow her to go to her favorite aunts for Christmas. Not surprisingly, they had refused, explaining it was too short of notice and the aunt would also be away with her own family.

"I will be, same with my dear older brother," stated (Y/N), recalling her parents were going to travel the world this Christmas, visiting her uncle in Egypt and Grandpa in America. The plans had been in place for a while now, but the uncle wasn't one who they got to see often, even if he always wrote and sent gifts for special occasions. Plus, it had been some time since their father had seen his own dad and his side of the family. The visit there was long overdue.

"I'll be going home, much-needed time with my sister Petunia," stated Lily, her bright smile dimming a little as she remembered how their once strong sisterly bond had faded in recent years. To the point that they barely spoke, and Petunia often ignored her. She had her own life now, friends that were normal rather than magical. "I'm hoping to fix our relationship; things haven't been the same since finding out I was a witch," commented the redhead, awkwardly moving her hair and brushing her fingers through it. She looked around the quiet dorm room, to her trunk that was already packed, and the presents sitting on top from three of the girls surrounding her.

"Family Christmas for me. Three generations in one house," chuckled Marlene, recalling the chaos that happened every year, her brothers always excitable on Christmas morning, ready to rip into the gifts, her grandparents telling stories of the past, her parents, aunt, and uncles casting a few spells to help the day go easier and entertain the younger ones. Despite the screaming, terrible singing, and often embarrassing stories, it still ended up being another perfect Christmas, even if the adults did end up tipsy or outright drunk by the night's end.

"At least I get rid of most of you and the boys," grumbled Allegra; the tension between the Smith Twins hadn't eased over the past month or so; if anything, it had gotten worse, to the point it was difficult for most to be around and the shared dorm had become almost unbearable. The two barely spoke to each other now and only stayed in the same place when there was no other choice, such as classes and the great hall. They did their best to stay away from each other when in the great hall and traveling between classes. Although Allegra still stayed close to the group, she often made rude comments. She acted as if she was the de facto leader, trying to control what everyone did and often shouting about the mischief and pranks being worthless.

"Remus mentioned Sirius was staying in the castle this year," voiced Marlene, glancing over to (Y/N) sitting on her bunk holding her penguin plushy, an open box of Berty Bots on the trunk at the end of her bed. "Apparently, he had a falling out with his parents about something, so he chose to stay behind," she added, mindlessly braiding her blonde locks, almost laughing as (Y/N) seemed to miss why Sirius chose to hang around the castle rather than taking James up on his offer to go to the Potter's for the holidays.

"He's a tosser, but he's somehow adorable at the same time," commented Lily, noticing the way (Y/N) looked around at the mention, still appearing oblivious to what almost everyone could clearly see. "Remus, too, is cute in a nervous way," laughed the auburn-haired girl, Isolde joining in, too. Marlene and (Y/N) looked at each other, the latter's cheeks heating up as if realizing what the girls were referring to, whereas (Y/N) looked on with confusion as if she didn't understand the direction the conversation had turned to.

"How in the name of magic haven't you noticed?" asked Isolde, directing her question to (Y/N), who looked back with confusion sparkling in her (E/C) eyes. She shook her head as if to indicate she didn't understand the question asked. "Come on, James practically yelled from the astronomy tower weeks ago," she added as Marlene and Lily began to laugh a little more. Isolde tried to find a way to explain it to her clueless friend.

"Sirius has a crush on you, (Y/N)," giggled Lily, blurting it out to save the awkward sidestepping Isolde was running at. "When James asked if Sirius had asked his girlfriend if she would brew the potion, he was referring to you," admitted Lily, finding the situation cute. How James, as gobby and annoying as he was, tried to help his best friend when it came to his school love life. "As I said, Sirius may be a toss pot, but you two would make a cute, mischievous couple," she added, as (Y/N)'s cheeks heated up at the realization, her eyes wide as she tried to hide behind the penguin plushy she held on to.

"Hey, if Sirus and (Y/N) are the Cute Mischief Couple, does that make Marlene and Remus the parents of the group?" asked Isolde, turning her attention to Marlene in time to see her hide her burning cheeks behind her hands, before quickly hiding beneath the wooly blanket previously resting across her bed. "At least you two recognize there's something there, and again, you'd make an adorably cute couple," she added as if to soothe the embarrassment a little. Allegra merely rolled her eyes from her bunk, not appreciating the girly talk or the reminder of others having what she wanted.

"And yet neither of you attended the winter dance together," voiced Allegra, pointing out Remus and Marlene didn't attend the dance together despite both recognizing there was a connection between them. Likewise, Sirius hadn't asked (Y/N) to be his date to the dance despite how obvious his crush on her was and how James and occasionally Remus pushed him to be truthful with himself and (Y/N).

"I can't walk in a straight line without falling over; how do you suppose I dance without my superpower of clumsiness taking hold?" asked (Y/N), a small smile appearing on her lips as her eyes began to sparkle with mischief again. Lily chuckled again, likely imagining the scenario mentioned or something else had tickled her about the comment. "Not to mention Sirius didn't ask, neither did Remus ask Marlene," she added, pointing out that neither of the boys had gained the courage to ask either of them to attend the winter dance with them. Just as it became clear again, Allegra hadn't paid attention; if she had, then she would have been aware (Y/N) had spent that week in the hospital wing again after being hit by a bludger during Quidditch. Remus had as well due to his condition being particularly difficult that month.

"Speaking of going on dates on all, Isolde, how was your date?" asked Marlene, turning the attention to Isolde, who looked like a deer caught in the headlights, her eyes wide as she began to pale at the realization she hadn't been as secretive as she thought she had been. Mentally, she questioned if one of them had seen her and her date at the Three Broomsticks or during their wander around the snowy Hogsmeade.

"At least tell me, my brother dearest was a gentleman," spoke (Y/N), her grin turning gentle as she revealed she was aware of the date; she found it cute, as much as Isolde and the others found her imaginary relationship with Sirius cute. Isolde looked over to (Y/N) with almost horror, as if terrified that she already knew of the months-old relationship. "He told me weeks ago. Said that he didn't want things to be awkward or make the friendship weird," admitted (Y/N), recalling when Hunter had pulled her aside to ask her permission to date Isolde. (Y/N) Being herself, she had asked why he needed permission. Although she did promise she'd kick her brother's ass if he hurt one of her best friends.

"See, this is why I say you Wolffe siblings are something to admire," laughed Lily, throwing a cushion at Isolde playfully. The brunette girl returned the favor soon after before breaking out in laughter. Marlene and (Y/N) glanced toward each other before hearing someone call their name from the common room. No doubt one of the boys.

"That will be the boys with the presents," spoke Marlene before getting up to answer the call. A soft smile appeared on her lips as she saw James waiting below, Peter next to him, wondering why he'd been roped into helping with the gift delivery. In the hands of the scrawny boy was the small pile of presents intended for him from each of the girls, each wrapped to the best of the individual's ability.

"You and Lily joining us on the train home tomorrow?" asked James, raising his voice slightly so Marlene could hear him over the chattering students crowding the common room, all of them getting ready to leave for the holidays. Knowing they had to be ready and at the station by noon the following day.

"I will be; I'm not sure about Lil. You get Mason, though, and I think Regulus," confirmed Marlene, walking to the small spiraling staircase to join the pair of boys in the common room. She was thankful to be away from Allegra again but dreading returning to the tension-filled room. She didn't want to imagine what would happen over the holiday period, with both Smith Twins being stuck in the castle and still having to share a dorm. However, she had little doubt (Y/N), and Sirius could handle it or remove themself from any situation if needed.

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leggerefiore · 1 year

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Alright, I'm curious now. How did the feral light fixture kidnapping go down? Did seeing his s/o cause some feral part of him recognize the s/o as his soulmate, and that sent him into overdrive? Or was it more of this vague 'I need to have this soul in my life' feeling that made the feral part of him come out? I'm fascinated by the idea Warden Ingo's feral side coming out when he is finally reunited with his mate that he can't remember. I'm also fascinated by how Irida dealt with explaining all of that, and what the possible fallout from the event was. I hope Ingo got Irida like the Pearl Clan equivalent of a gift basket for having to deal with that mess when he spirited his mate away to the mountains.

kinda skipped on the overly feral side buuut

cw: PLA Ingo, Chandelure Ingo, Technical Kidnapping (nothing serious), Ingo's amnesia at play

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Ingo would admit that he acted a bit hastily when he saw you. He knew he had lost control of his ghostly powers since landing in Hisui, often having to recall how to properly take an appropriate amount of life energy to not cause too much harm to whomever he took from. Yet… When you walked out of your home into his line of sight, he froze for a moment. Something in him cried and pleaded for you. It was unnatural and distressing, yet he found himself unable to ignore it.

So…

He watched your eyes go wide as his picked you up to carry you away. You made no move to struggle, instead of wrapping your arms around him to help better balance yourself. Of course, this was still a kidnapping under the common law of Jubilife. Irida stood horrified nearby, watching the scene unfold.

Her Warden, who already been a bit troublesome in the past out of his own volition, had just kidnapped the person she was having help the frenzied Noble issue plaguing Hisui.

This was going to assuredly upset the Galaxy Team.

Ingo apologised to you many times as he carried you further and further away from the village. You were stunned by all of this, naturally. First the sight of your boyfriend in Hisui and second the fact his primary response was to quite literally carry you away. He eventually placed you down the closer he grew to Mount Coronet. You watched as he stared at you for a moment with flustered cheeks before averting his eyes.

“What have I done?” he realised with a deep breath. You just shook your head. Classic Ingo, you almost wanted to joke before taking on his appearance. Long tattered coat, hat fallen in disrepair, eyes distant and uncertain. His flame even flickered nervously. It would almost seem like he was a different person, rather than the man you knew and loved.

“It's okay, Ingo, I know you just missed me,” you softly told him, reaching up to cup his cheeks, but he took a step away. That stung, but he likely just felt nervous about everything that had happened. “Ingo…? Are you okay?” you asked gently. How long had he been here? Since he disappeared? Poor guy must be stricken to see you and unsure of everything. At least he had seemed to end up with the Pearl Clan over Jubilife, as they were much kinder and more respecting of hybrids than the Galaxy Team.

“… I'm sorry,” he repeated while shaking his head, “I-I don't know you… I just… I just felt like I needed you. That was not at all proper behaviour from me. Lady Irida will have to handle this…” His breaths grew a bit unsteady as tears began to form in his eyes. You stood stiffly. He didn't remember you? That… seemed wrong, but entirely plausible. You approached him again and gently pulled him into a hug.

“Well, I'm not upset with you,” you spoke gently to him, “I'm your soulmate, Ingo.” You took his hand and gently placed it on your chest. His breaths slowed slightly as he closed his eyes. Ingo clung to you desperately for what most have felt like hours in only a few minutes. “I love you…" you continued. Slowly, his eyes met yours.

His eternal warmth soaked sweetly into your bones as his eyes gazed deep into something that was only visible to ghost-types. “... I love you, too,” his voice was endlessly deep, “I… should probably take you back to the village…”

You nodded.

They were likely preparing to hunt Ingo for sport.

Irida stood nervously in Kamado's office as Adaman shot her a smug grin. How could she explain the Warden's actions in a way that would not cater to Kamado's distaste for hybrids? She bites her lip as she debates seriously banishing Ingo. It was a shame how talented he was with pokemon because it was seriously the only she was currently defending him (outside of the rare advantage of having a ghost type hybrid on her clan's side).

“So, do you take full responsibility for your subordinates actions?” The Galaxy Team leader's voice could kill. She sighed. What could she do? Seriously. Adaman even seemed tensed now about everything.

“I do-” she started but was interrupted by the doors of the office slamming open.

You stood there in a heavy sweat, taking deep breaths.

“Sorry, Warden Ingo is my boyfriend! He just overreacted!"

Kamado's expression turned darker at those words somehow.

#ingo x reader #ingo/reader #pokemon ingo x reader #pokehybrid au #ingo.ima

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sweet-hearts-and-destiny-knots · 5 months

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Thanks so much for answering my first ask! :D What you said for Akari makes perfect sense; and honestly, if someone just Appeared one day and spoke not only my language perfectly but ALSO spoke with perfect understanding of current linguistic norms, I would also be a little suspicious. But that makes her really enjoyable!

I ALSO realized last night that I got so caught up with asking about the timeline that I forgot to ask about Akari in a general sense!

So in the spirit of that: what is the hardest adjustment for Akari to make? Obviously she has some level of amnesia so I'm not sure if she remembers technology, but I imagine there are still adjustments to be made. Is there anything she particularly enjoys in terms of crafting? Medicines, pokeballs, etc? Honestly when thinking of PLA and OCs/characters outside of the game I also think about building structures, dyeing cloth, etc...it's just fun!

And then there's Volo. Who has more than had his fair share of being treated like an outcast, held close because he's useful but not close enough to be considered a part of the community; I wonder if that's something he has in common with your Akari? I know it's something I think about a lot, how the protag is useful until all the use is gone, and then who is there for her but Volo? I just have FEELINGS about them.

ALSO just wanna jump to Hikari and say that I really love your characterization of her, esp in contrast to the Actual characterizations we get >.> I really enjoy a terrifying-gazed, calm and elegant character who can utterly Destroy her competition.

My brain is a LITTLE all over the place so I'm struggling to respond to your response but I just wanna say again thanks so much for responding, and that I really enjoyed reading it! :D Also Gloria and Victor have a perfect sibling relationship I see, good. XD

Aside from briefly being unable to recall her name when asked for it, Akari has actually retained her memories.

It creates a contrast with Ingo, who appeared in the past without his but experiences phantom recollections. Meanwhile Akari is left fully aware of her previous life, and those moments can linger around her nearly wherever she goes.

I believe the most difficult thing Akari has to adjust to in Hisui is, perhaps surprisingly, something relatively simple - waking up on someone else's orders.

Calls at the break of day from The League requesting (or perhaps demanding) her presence weren't something that never occurred, but it wasn't as though they could dismiss her from the position of Champion if she chose not to respond...

Hikari values her sleep, and taking on another name hasn't changed this aspect of her personality.

Poor Rei loathes being commanded to wake her whenever there's early morning business to be attended to because, "I like my arms right where they are - still attached to my body!"

Volo does indeed feel a near instant connection with Akari due to believing they're both outsiders. While certainly not hated or even disliked, he's known for years that an invisible barrier separates him from the rest of the world.

When he first learns that someone, a young woman, had fallen from the rift, a wave of guilt washes over him.

After all, he's responsible for this happening to her in the first place, however indirectly it may be. The absolute least he can do is meet this unfortunate soul and offer his aid in some way...

And then he meets her, and the invisible barrier that always surrounded him at last shatters.

It's love at first sight.

...

... ...

... ... ... On his end, anyway!

#Akari #Hikari #Volo #Wieldershipping #Volo x Akari #Pokémon Legends: Arceus #Pokémon: Sisterhood

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loveyourlovelysoul · 6 months

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so as I was mentioning in a previous post about staying in touch with other people, even those that may not be important... there's this "friend"/neighbor which I haven't been talking to for so long. I could say we lost each other slowly cause of life, and even if she moved back in my neighborhood not long ago, we didn't really got closer again. like, at all. I think we just grew apart, and that's okay: at first it hurt ofc but now I totally accept it.

let me explain.

as I started healing recently, I understood it wasn't just her not considering me that much, but also me having said lot of no's to her (more or less openly), for my own fears (parents' overreaction mostly: I wasn't that aware of this habit of mine back then, so I couldn't speak about it and so she didn't know -but probably got something anyway since she often said how tough to deal with they seemed to be). all this ofc made our bond to just become looser and looser as we moved to uni and she moved to other cities and countries, until it basically became inexistent.

despite having shared the same classes and/or school for most of our lives, we also had different backgrounds/upbringings, different friends (despite some common ones), different habits, different characters (she's always been way more extroverted than me while I used to shy away, even if I often followed her doing weird/funny stuff for others), different lives and goals, different personal problems too... even different views on things especially these days (again, it's fine! we met different people and had different experience since when we used to play and talk together as kids and teens, that too formed us into different human beings). I think we were just different and many times she had been pretending... but ofc, I have no objective proof about this: it could be just my (wounded ego) impression nowadays.

anyway. a couple of months ago she gave birth. ofc she didn't tell me (not even when she got married a couple of years ago to a guy I know as well). I found out by chance after our mothers met, despite having been talking a bit with her hubby in the previous months (he didn't tell me anything about the pregnancy as if it was top-secret). I could have decided this was the last time that she/they closed me off, and honestly at first I felt this way while I was saying "Idc, her/their decision". but talking with an external friend I realized: maybe I could just give her a present for her baby and not make all this and our past matter too much. just see how it goes. we're adults and neighbors now, and that's how I can look at us these days. we can turn the page.

so, even if I felt a bit uncomfortable and part of me didn't feel like (especially for the fact that I wanted to feel as our friendship was definitely closed, and I needed to close with the past abruptly), I texted her asking how she was doing and if she had 5 mins for me to go see her and bring her a little thing for her baby. she replied inviting me for a walk. we went out, both pretending everything was fine and nothing ever happened. we kinda had fun talking about the baby, his quirks, about a neighborhood's problem (as adults do) and remembering a few events of our childhood. I felt more grounded than I thought (despite I couldn't always recall all the words I wanted to say, but I haven't been speaking 1:1 irl for a real lot of time now, except for a few words here and there in specific contexts); she was kinda calm too but I think the pregnancy also made her. she has changed especially in her voice, and it felt weird to see her holding a baby and feeding him. she also asked me to help her with the baby carriage when she had to hold him which ofc I did. and then we went back home after an hour or so, I gave her the gift and we both told each other we could have met for a walk another day (I am kinda sure this won't happen -unless it will be me asking? Idk-, it's just one of those sentences you say out of courtesy, but it felt coherent with how that hour went) and that we'll keep in touch anyway about the neighborhood's problem (more likely?): at the end of the day, I asked about her but she didn't ask anything about me and my life/family anyway, not even when we ended up staying silent for a while (it wasn't uncomfortable for me btw, can't say for her).

once I arrived home I was literally freezing cause the sun was gone and it got pretty cold; I had the feeling she kinda wanted to suddenly run away at that time and find another place to go (maybe, Idk), but I was feeling good. I had a nice interaction, out of all the past context we had been through. it helped me start to get back "out there" again, in a kind of "known" environment (in the end, we still have known each other since ages), to be hugged and hug again (even if it wasn't too felt probably, but it works as practice too heh). and also it reminded me that not everyone has to stay in our life forever and we're not supposed to be in everyone's life forever; and that feelings and bonds can change and evolve in something different as well, if we let them too. they can turn calmer, less profound, and more patient and respectful of each one's new life and boundaries. ofc it's not for everyone, for every relationship: there has to be a *silent* agreement between the parts, at least. not saying I agree with why I wasn't told about the baby or other good news or why I wasn't asked about me out of courtesy even on these terms, but... it was her/their decision and I respect and accept it now. as I will respect their spaces and boundaries from now on without really caring. at all and for real, this time. I know where I stand (and where she stands for me), and that's okay: not because I submissively accept it as her/their decision, but because I understand and agree there's no other way.

this meeting really helped me to see things under a new perspective and actually gave closure, in a way, to my past hurt feelings. differently from how building a wall or cutting cords has ever. now I'll just let things be and really not care much, and treat each other politely as random acquaintances/neighbors. but I can say I really feel much more eager to meet new people, to get out there and test myself after all those years of isolation I put myself in while healing (which made me so rusty and didn't help much, even if I kept talking online at least and learning about boundaries here... but that's not the same). I know now I can bear with that stress, no matter how it'll turn out. I feel stronger and more in touch with myself than ever. it's true: what you make other's decisions and behaviours mean about yourself, only depends on you. I was probably *unconsciously* making it all mean that I was not good enough, not even as an acquaintance/neighbor. but even if it is so according to her/them, I decide to not make it mean anything about my present and actual worth: I have been working on myself so hard and so much that I'm far from being the *scared* girl I used to be in the past and they have no clue about it. and I don't need or want to show them anyway as there's no reason for it. I am closing with the past anyway, whether past people will acknowledge it and come with me in my future or not or in what measure/form they will/won't. it doesn't matter. it only matters what I do and think of my path until today. and what I will decide to do and think about it (and me) from today on.

#healing #relationships #friendship #my story #life #vulnerability #self growth #closure #feelings #words

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ryqoshay · 7 months

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How to Handle a Nico: Volume Settings?

Primary Pairing: NicoMaki Words: 577 Rating: G Time Frame: Sometime during their college years Prompt: Pianissimo

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Author's Note: Bonus 2nd prompt for the 14th

Summary: Nico listens to Maki play the piano

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Nico sat back on the couch and let the music wash over her. This was the life. Who would have thought that an old, beat-up electric keyboard could bring so much joy to the home? Obviously, everyone knew it would make Maki happy, but the overall amount of happiness they had all gained was a bit surprising.

Eli and Nozomi had stumbled across the discounted device and brought it back to the apartment Nico and Nozomi shared, and Eli and Maki regularly stayed in. And for the past couple weeks, Maki had spent no less than half an hour a day playing. Nico was the most common audience member, but Nozomi and Eli had enjoyed plenty of time listening as well.

The music sessions had become a welcome break from the hustle and bustle of college courses, idol practice, and the general stresses of everyday life. They were akin to taking an extended bath with Epsom salts, or cuddling on the couch to watch some mindless movie, or drinking Nico’s special warmed milk before bed.

But the main attraction for Nico was watching her girlfriend lose herself in the music she loved.

Today, Maki had chosen a classical ballad, of which Nico had already forgotten the title. And while the piece was indeed lovely, as Nico watched Maki’s fingers caress the keys, an odd thought occurred to her.

Had Maki turned down the volume of the keyboard?

The piece prior had been at least a dozen decibels louder, but Nico didn’t recall seeing Maki touch the volume setting. Nico knew that pressing a real piano’s keys softer would cause the hammers to strike the strings softer, and in turn produce a softer sound. But how did that work on an electric keyboard that lacked such physical parts?

And for that matter, how had Nico not noticed this before? There were other pieces Maki had played that shifted between forte and piano at various points. Had Maki been adjusting the volume knob each time, or was there a built-in setting in the keys?

As the ballad neared its end, Nico got up from the couch and made her way over to her girlfriend.

“Mm?” Maki startled a little, as though waking from a trance. “Nico-chan?”

“Sorry, I was just wondering why it was so quiet.” Nico inspected the volume settings.

“Because the piece is to be played piano or pianissimo.” Maki said.

“Yeah, but I didn’t see you touch the knob.”

Maki blinked. “Why would I?”

“To play softer?”

Something clicked in Maki’s mind. “Oh, no, there is no need for that. See, the keys are programed to respond to the speed at which they are depressed.” She demonstrated by producing two different volumes of tone from the same key.

“I’m not seeing a difference.” Nico admitted.

“It’s subtle.” Maki said. “Just like with a real piano. Honestly, for a bunch of plastic attached to a circuit board, it mimics the piano I have back at my parent’s place remarkably well. I’ve played some bad keyboards, but Nozomi really found a gem with this one.”

“Nozomi is pretty good at finding diamonds in the rough.” Nico said, recalling her roommate’s role in assembling µ’s back in high school.

“Mm.” Maki hummed, seeming to understand Nico’s unspoken point.

“Anyway, I should probably start on dinner.” Nico said after a moment of comfortable quiet between them. “Can I count on musical accompaniment while I do so?”

Maki smiled. “Of course.”

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Author's Note Continued: I really like this prompt. If for no other reason than it gives me an excuse to write about my favorite LL pianists.

#NicoMaki #Nishikino Maki #Yazawa Nico #How to Handle a Nico #Love Live #fanfic #Promptober 2023

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carousel-of-souls · 1 year

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Gotham New Orleans Backstory: Bane

Warnings: violence, corrupt justice systems, maybe body horror

Bane is Mexican/Black, specifically Dominican but since that is his father’s side and he wasn’t raised by the man, not to mention loathes him, Bane doesn’t consider that a part of his identity culturally speaking at least.

He was born in Santa Prisca, in Peña Duro, made to take on his father’s life sentence. His most vivid memories there are if his mother, she often sang to him. She talked a lot about God and Heaven, looking back Bane can recognize she was having some less than healthy ideations talking about dying and being in heaven so much. Before he was old enough to fully comprehend the permanence of his situation he wanted to be a musician. She taught him to read and write before she died but only Spanish.

The guards didn’t treat her well anyways but when they caught her doing what they thought was trying to organize an escape for Bane, really she was smuggling in a teddy bear, they killed her.

He had to watch while the guards beat his mother, this time they left her with a severe concussion without medical attention. It took a few days for her to die. He was made to dispose of her body himself by dragging it to the nearby cliff and throwing it into the ocean.

They cut the teddy bear open to make sure nothing was hidden inside and then let Bane keep it, out of total indifference not out of kindness.

He didn’t touch the bear for a long time. He was furious that his mother had “gotten herself killed” over something so useless and ridiculous and sentimental. He did find it useful when he had things that needed to be hidden but he didn’t form a real emotional attachment to Osito for a long time.

Thoug there were a lot of awful inmates most of the real tyranny in Peña Duro came from the guards.

Before he was in real fighting shape Bane was a biter. A lot of people found that out the hard way.

He didn’t have many people he could trust but he did have a few. He learned to read and write in English from an old priest, Bane resented the man for still believing that if heaven was real humans deserved to be in it, philosophical differences aside that was the closest Bane has been with anyone since his mother.

Bane read a lot and meditated and got himself in shape to defend himself when he needed to, without using his teeth.

When the priest died Bane got his stuff. In that was a small radio. He didn’t think much of it until he turned it on, intending to tinker with it and possibly contact someone on the outside, and he heard a song his mother used to sing (Amor Eterno). That’s the first time he cried since she died.

He hid the radio in Osito and if he hadn’t had that he wouldn’t have survived the amount of solitary he got put in when he got strong enough to kill anyone who messed with him, which turned out to be a lot of people.

Recalling things he’d read or meditating only did so much, hearing voices besides his own is largely what kept him sane. He had to keep it low so it wouldn’t be discovered and taken away so he would listen through Osito’s chest, the music muffled by stuffing.

Being in solitary so often made him determined to get out of Peña Duro. He faked his death and was thrown into the ocean. He swam for a long time before sneaking onto a freighter that was headed to Gotham.

Once in Gotham he didn’t really have any plans. He was hiding in the sewers just to be safe so he wasn’t found by anyone who wanted him back at Peña Duro. He ran into Killer Croc and Clayface who live down there and they offered for him to live with them after seeing him a few times. They technically live in an abandoned part of the train system but the only way in anymore is through the sewers. They use the platform as a common area and some old traincars as bedrooms.

Bane started hearing about Batman from his new roommates. They had been kind enough to take him in so he didn’t appreciate them being trifled with.

He knew from living in Peña Duro that those who enforce “justice” only do it for themselves or their class and not for people who needed it. Being around the city the image of the Batman was everywhere to Bane, being shoved in his face. He had only heard stories about him from the rogues’ point of view. When Bane saw that Batman was working with the police that confirmed to him he was masquerading as the people’s hero while upholding the status quo. That feeling festered for a while and Bane felt like rebelling against Batman and the city.

He set some bombs around the city, to get Batman’s attention. But by putting one in the botanical garden he got Ivy’s attention instead.

Before he could set them off she found him and they fought. He was losing so he did what he used to do with opponents stronger than him and he bit Ivy’s throat out. Not knowing that she’s not mortal or that she isn’t made of flesh and blood.

Harley and Ivy were not sexually active with eachother at this point so Ivy wasn’t minding the levels of toxic/poisonous plant matter in her body. She’d only had to make her mouth safe for kissing. So Bane bit a sizeable chunk out of her throat and held it in his mouth because not spitting it out, he’d learned, made people unsettled and more easily beaten. But then of course all the poison in her body as well as her rejuvenation serum started interacting with him.

It’s a potent life giving substance but was also very deadly so it immediately started invading Bane’s blood to travel to old wounds to heal them. It blinded him and made his vision better than it was before. It cleared his airways more than they had been in years before sending him into anaphylaxis. It stopped his heart and started it over and over. The substance was chasing after itself in his body, rapidly doing and un-doing a lot of damage.

Bane was convulsing on the ground when Batman arrived and Ivy was about to kill him when Batman started fighting her to stop her. The only thing that got her to back off was Batman blowing her arm off with weed killer grenades he has specifically for emergencies with her.

Batman knew that Bane was about to blow up parts of the city but he wasn’t going to let him stay in that agonizing state that would probably go on forever.

Batman didn’t know Hugo Strange’s eviler doings at this time but he did know he had been doing experiments with Ivy’s DNA he’d gotten during her times in Arkham, and was the only one who could possibly do something.

Bane was left with Hugo Strange who fiddled with Ivy’s serum trying to make something to get it to stabilize within Bane. Messing with the serum removed it’s ability to regenerate itself infinitely like it does in Ivy’s body. Hugo just called it Venom because he needed something to label the project with and it was the first thing that came to mind. Hugo figured out a formula to get Ivy’s serum to stabilize in Bane and hooked him up to a way for it to pump through his system properly. Ivy’s serum was originally made to grow and rejuvenate plants hence Bane’s altered size and strength.

Now Bane has been stuck in Arkham for the past few years because Hugo is the only one who knows how to make Venom and he keeps that information locked away to have Bane under his control.

Bane figures Hugo won’t be in power forever and he’s fine to wait. When he gets out he wants to get revenge on Batman. He doesn’t see him as malevolent anymore but he does think he needs to be punished for his negligence.

Additional info:

He likes tea

Deep down he still dreams about another life where he could’ve been a musician.

#Bane #gotham new orleans #au info

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nicklloydnow · 8 months

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“Anhedönia has been getting more acquainted with Ethel Cain, the character whose story she’s been tracing across multiple projects since 2018, and whose background she plans to explore further on an EP planned for later this year. Listeners first got to know the full, tragic arc she had in mind on her 2022 debut album, Preacher’s Daughter — a stunning release that showed Anhedönia’s atmospheric production and her knack for Southern Gothic imagery and intense themes, like religious indoctrination, sexual violence, isolation, and family trauma.

Ethel Cain is a work of fiction, one that first came to Anhedönia on “A House in Nebraska,” a spine-tingling song she wrote at age 19. Ethel and her creator share a lot in common. Both are women who took off on their own, leaving their oppressive Christian communities: Ethel grew up in Alabama, while Anhedönia herself came from a rural town in Florida called Perry, where she was home-schooled and brought up Baptist. But Anhedönia takes Ethel into much darker terrain from there on Preacher’s Daughter, having the character grapple with abuse at the hands of her father as she treks out west, where she encounters drugs, sex work, and dangerous men — until eventually she’s kidnapped, killed, and cannibalized.

It’s a violent, fatalist plot told over dazed pianos and dramatic blasts of distortion, Anhedönia’s voice often steady and dreamlike even at cruel turns. She’d long looked up to artists like Lana Del Rey, Marina, and Florence + the Machine, and her debut album feels like a twisted collage of those references playing over a feverish Donald Ray Pollock novel — he’s one of her favorite writers, along with others in the Southern Gothic canon. The EP she’s working on now covers Ethel’s high school years. Anhedönia says she envisions it as another chapter to a longer story she’s been telling: “I feel like this is truly laying Ethel Cain to rest.”

(…)

There was one part of secular culture that Anhedönia recalls being allowed to explore: horror movies, which she watched at her grandparents’ house. “I was really anxious and scared of everything. And so my pop, in all his wisdom, decided I should come spend the night and watch every R-rated horror movie that he had.” They’d go to Walmart and buy a Betty Crocker cake with strawberry icing to eat while they watched The Blair Witch Project, The Ring, or the Final Destination series. “He was like, ‘Watch this, you won’t be scared anymore,’ ” Anhedönia says.

But slowly, real-world uncertainties began to set in. Anhedönia says she’d always understood, somewhere deep inside of her, that she felt an attraction to both sexes. “I had crushes on girls, I had crushes on boys,” she says. “And I didn’t even really know what that meant.” Her neighborhood was small and full of old ladies, as she describes it, and she’d noticed that people treated one of her neighbors, a gay man who lived in town, differently. “I started to get this inkling in my head at some point as I was approaching adolescence, like, ‘Is that not allowed?’ ” So when she was about 11 years old, she turned to her parents with an innocent query. “I thought I was just going to be like, ‘Hey … I have a question.’ ” This is often painted as Anhedönia’s coming-out story, but the truth is, she was just a kid asking about something she didn’t fully understand. “I was like, ‘I think I like boys.’ ”

In a community obsessed with upholding puritanical ideals they believed would keep the devil at bay, all hell broke loose, she says. Families from her church would tell her mom that Anhedönia couldn’t play with their kids. Her parents sent her to therapy. Her life grew even lonelier and darker, cascading into several years that she now says she hardly remembers — in between home-school lessons, she spent most of her time in bed with the curtains drawn. “Living in that environment, you just want to get out of it,” she says. “I remember just kind of locking away parts of myself and thinking, ‘You’re going to wake up, you’re going to eat, you’re going to deal with whatever happens today, you’re going to go to sleep, and then you’re going to keep doing that until this is over.’ ”

(…)

At 16, she started taking classes at a community college, then went to school to become a nail technician at 18. By then, she’d flown out the door and started living on her own in Tallahassee, indulging in her new freedom. She experimented with acid, opioids, Xanax, meth once. “When you come from such an oppressive upbringing, you tend to spiral for a moment,” she admits. It was right around then that the idea of Ethel Cain began blossoming in her mind.

She found other answers, too. “It wasn’t until I was nearing adulthood when I discovered what being trans was, through Tumblr of all places,” she recalls. “I didn’t even know you could do that. I didn’t know that was a thing.” Up until then, her church had told her she was gay. The actual identity she came to understand for herself “wasn’t even in the conversation in any way,” she continues. “Wrong letter.”

Anhedönia is careful when she talks about being trans, emphasizing that her gender identity is only one fact in a complex personality. “When you are trans, you are living a very specific experience that not many other people in the world have,” she says. “I wanted to not be known as a trans artist, I think, not because I didn’t want people to know I was trans, or because I didn’t want to be proud of that fact, but.… It has shaped the way that I am in certain ways, but it’s not everything.”

(…)

There’s a sense in which it’s hard to imagine Anhedönia being contained by any music-business paperwork, because of just how expansive her imagination is, and just how much she wants to do. Before Ethel Cain came to her, she’d been sketching out three characters: Teddy, an androgynous altar boy with a vigilante streak; Salem, a woodsy witch with long white hair; and Carter, a time-traveler with a portal in his basement. Then Ethel Cain came along. “I knew it was going to be music, but I was like, ‘Can I write a story? Can I make a film? I want to draw this,’ ” she says. “I’m so obsessed with this story. I want to tell it in a million different ways.”

Later this year, she plans to leave Pittsburgh. She’s chasing brutal winters to match the tone of her next full-length album, which she describes as dark and cold. It’ll focus on the story behind Ethel’s mother, and see her grappling with her daughter’s death. The one after that will dive into Ethel’s grandmother.

There are other characters lurking in her head, waiting to come out — but she still thinks she has a lot of time to spend with the Cain women, and a long time before she reaches the end of the story. “This is going to be 15, 20 years from now,” she says. “I work very slow. That’s how I like it.””

#ethel cain #anhedonia

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nonclassyparty · 1 year

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Genuine question, why did San never consider Y/N? Like, okay, he could be just looking for someone to warm his bed but in the beginning you said he helped her just because he was being nice and not because he wanted something out of it, that 'the rest' just happened. Okay, I understand. But then, after that, he wasn't interested in her, yet he went and made it up to her whenever they fought (I recall you mentioned smth like that, that he goes all vanilla whenever he upsets her). Why didn't he just drop her to find someone else?

I'm just curious about at what point San thought 'nope, she's not for me' or just, what he didn't like in her. Because can't say he doesn't want commitment, he's dated Boyoung. I wonder what makes guys drop a girl like Y/N. San particularly? As he only judged her shell? Never bothered to have a full conversation with her, nor a date?

Thanks! 🫶🏻

OHHHHHHHH okay i'll try to explain in the best way i possibly can 😭

first of all, it's important to know that san isn't rich and of status like y/n. it was mentioned in the beginning by wooyoung, san comes from the countryside and has spent his entire life working- college, part-time jobs etc etc he even works now at the car repair shop while studying to be an engineer (which is NOT easy😭 but he has to do it) that immediately makes him have a disdain for rich people who got everything handed to them (y/n). when you grow up working hard for money, the 'money doesnt buy you happiness' is just bullshit so obviously he never cared about y/n's struggles or problems bc san is like "u are rich and never worked for anything in ur life why should i care if u are sad?' its also why he thinks he doesn't have more in common with her than just sex.

second of all, san doesn't drop girls 😭 y/n mentioned it in the first chapter, he likes having options whether it's girls he hooked up with before or new ones he meets, san always had more than one girl he was hooking up with. and he wasn't interested in y/n romantically but he definitely was physically. yn is HOT (i mention it all the time but it's important bc she's with all these men for a reason which is that they're attracted to her physically), she's also rich and of status (she had like an entire monologue about this in act 1). she mentioned how he let her in his circle of friends and its bc it makes him feel good for other people to see that someone like her is in his presence. it's a totally human thing, hanging out with people everyone deems important makes you feel more important as well😭

and san didn't do commitment, boyoung is the girl that 'changed' that but he stayed as far away from relationships as he could before he met her.

when y/n would get mad at him, san didn't make it up to her bc he felt bad it was more like 'ah shit, she's pissed now i gotta do something nice for her' yk? it was more like a chore to sweeten her up again bc y/n was his main girl, he prided himself in getting to hook up with her and he doesn't want to seem like a bad guy even tho he sometimes is😭 it's also the reason he avoided her when he started getting closer to boyoung bc he knew it would hurt yn and he doesnt want to seem like a dick. nobody likes being the bad guy, that shit doesnt exist, nobody outright claims they're an asshole instead they do sneaky shit like san for example and make you believe you're at fault for catching feelings or getting attached to take some burden off of themselves bc they know they didnt exactly treat you fairly but if they manage to split the guilt with you then they're like 'oh okay so it wasnt all MY fault, you're to blame as well bc u knew what this was from the start'

conclusion; san likes knowing that y/n wants him. of all people someone like her (and san only looks at it from a materialistic perspective so someone rich, pretty, popular and with a high status) could have, she wants san and it makes him feel better about himself.

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castorochiaro · 2 years

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💔 📢 🔔 and 📝 for Scratch because I just enjoy hearing you talk about him :D (This is also a excuse for you to do all emojis if you want, no pressure!)

character ask game [ x ]

aaaa chy you're always so sweet, thank you for once again enable me to ramble about my favorite dead guy. i accept your challenge to do 'em all!

🏳️‍🌈lgbt+ headcanon - bisexual icon babeyyyyy. toyed with the idea of him being intersex at one point, just would hafta be something i did more research on before i would feel comfortable exploring it in more depth.

💌fluffy headcanon- he purrs. i don't care if it makes no sense i love it so i'm holding on to it.

💔angsty headcanon- scratch was placed in foster care from birth, and has never met his birth parents or learned anything about them. he idealizes being part of a family so much because his experience bouncing between foster families wasn't good. even if he doesn't actively remember his life anymore, those feelings of never quite belonging remain.

🧸 hurt/comfort headcanon- it's common practice for ghosts to honor their death anniversary. i think that's one of the few tidbits of his previous life he recalls, even if he doesn't know when or where or how he died (or "died", in the case of wraith!scratch tho he doesn't know that's what he is). he doesn't know his name, so there's no grave to visit. i think he just lights a candle and is still for a while, letting himself feel those feelings of mourning for a single night out of the year.

🪀silly headcanon- he sings to himself when he's SURE nobody is around. he loves showtunes, and gets musicals stuck in his head all the time.

💤sleep headcanon - wraith!scratch related, but i muse on this headcanon sometimes where while he's sleeping he can briefly end up back in his body again. but it's always such a weird experience, he assumes they're simply dreams and forgets about them. it doesn't happen every time or even most of the time, and occurs less and less the longer he's separated from it.

✨a ship i like with this character - there's quite a few, because he's my favorite and therefore everyone is mandated to love on him. BUT the top faves right now are him with sally, jinx, and alister. my gf and i have this whole headcanon canon-divergent backstory that involves some OCs of hers that i ship him with. and of course, your selfship always makes me feel all warm and smiley!

🔪a ship i Don't like with this character - uHH i mean outside of the obvious no-no stuff, i can't think of one?? i guess i don't really ship him with geoff, but i don't dislike it or anything. just kinda neutral on it?

🎃something i think they're afraid of - ok this is another headcanon-based one, but i've noticed scratch cringes very strongly at the idea of being punished by the ghost council (and by THEM specifically, not anything to do with being thrown in the flow since he mentions being yelled at being the thing he's worried about). so i think he experienced some amount of corporal punishment when he was alive, such that the instinct to brace for impact so to speak is still present, when dealing with authority figures.

📦overall feelings about them - it really takes a special kind of character to strike the spark that scratch does in me. he inspires me, he brings me immense comfort and happiness, and i just! really super appreciate the fact he exists. i get embarrassed about how crushy and silly i get over him, because i genuinely do find him loveable, so...it's nice that people enjoy hearing what i have to say and like the things i write and make about him. he's so special, he deserves all the love!

📢favorite thing about them in canon- it's a tie between his voice and his design/animation. i just have this THING with characters where if they have a unique voice and design, my brain hooks on to them and obsessively studies them. their vocal tics, little bits of animation i like, just...the LITTLE things, y'know?

scratch got me right off the bat because i've been a fan of "aqua teen hunger force" since i was a teenager (and it's a popular source of references in my family because we used to watch it together). but the more i watched how he moved and emoted the more entranced i was with him as his own character.

🧨least favorite thing about them in canon- DEALING WITH HIATUSES I MISS HIM SO MUCH

💬favorite line they've said- oh god i'm horrible with picking favorites on stuff like this. i guess when i think favorite lines, i think of stuff that i come back to a lot in writing/analyzing a character, and for scratch that's him awkwardly explaining to molly why he lied to her about knowing lincoln personally. you can hear in his voice that he's trying to sort out his feelings into words, and that's very new for him.

also really like his speech at the end of the s1 finale. it sums up what makes him work so well as a character: he doesn't look down on molly for caring so much, he finds it greatly admirable! even if that's not the way he is, he loves her personality and is proud to be her friend. his avoidance of caring and commitment stems from a fear of being hurt, rather than him just plain being an apathetic jerk.

he IS a bit of a jerk but with a soft and squishy center

ok one more him bein' a l'il bitch in "friend off" is also fantastic he's so pretty when he's mean

DID I MENTION I'M BAD AT PICKING FAVORITES

🔔unpopular opinion- i want the wraith!scratch theory to be canon and don't think it diminishes anything about his sadness or loneliness. hell, i think it's even SADDER to imagine he just plain gave up on being alive.

🔊a song that reminds me of them- "love like you" and "i'm still here" always give me big scratch vibes. would love to do an edit to one of them at some point!

📝misc thoughts/headcanons - i LOVE the aspiring actor headcanon! i like to think he always wanted to get into it, but was so terrified of failure he just never went for it. he'd memorize monologues (that he still remembers, even post mortem, and can recite very easily) and get all prepared, but...just end up sitting in the audience, too petrified of making a fool of himself to get on stage. just love the symbolism of him always being part of the audience, but never the show. feels like a good way to sum up how he lived his life, allowing it all to pass him by in order to avoid being hurt by caring too much.

#ask #cast converses #meme response #Scratch #long post #this took SO long but it was soooooo worth it #is it obvious i think about him...a LOT

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fayesdiary · 2 years

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For the emoji meme: 🤡🛒🦅🤲✨️!

Got it!

🤡 What’s a line, scene, or exchange you’ve written that made you laugh?

Arden showing up late at the Barbecue of Belhalla, Delthea calling Luthier stupid in How to Rescue your Nerd Brother, and "I'm sure after we win, Sir Clive will make me a knight of Zofia! (…not sure about Python though)" in Valentian Reports😂

🛒 What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

Oddly enough, I'm not really sure how to answer this. Mostly because I feel every fic I wrote is pretty different from the other.

I guess there is a trend of swapping roles, reports/journal entries and soulless people though😂

🦅 Do you outline fics or fly by the seat of your pants?

If thinking scenes over and over in my head counts as outlining, then I am! But I'm pretty sure it doesn't, so flying by the seat of my pants it is.

🤲 Would you please share a snippet of a wip?

This is a snippet of a fic where Rinea survives Act 5 and not gonna lie, I've been stuck on it for a while despite how badly I want to write it, so I'm glad to be able share at least some of it.

If someone had told Rinea one day she live in Nuibaba's Abode back in her past life, she would have taken it as a twisted joke, if not an outright threat. And yet here she was now, approaching the entrance to it with a few bags, along with one of her caretakers who was years younger than her. [...] She was slowly gaining more control over the magic handed to her against her will especially compared to the first few days when she was almost always in Vestal state, but accidents where she went berserk still happened from time to time.

Especially when her thoughts dwelled on him for too long.

Sonya and Genny called Rinea holding on to her memories and self a miracle, and her newfound sisters were quite curious of her past life, since they were unable to recall their own. Rinea herself viewed it as a curse, something that only reminded her how much she lost in that fire.

✨ Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉

Oh! Well...

I'm proud of having finally finished a multi-chapter fic, and a pretty good one at that if I say so myself! I still can't fathom how I managed to write almost all of Valentian Reports on the phone😂

And I really like how I delved into obscure parts of canon only me and a few other people are likely interested in! I still remember the days where I went feral over Nuibaba having a Risen mask that culminated into writing a whole fic about it very fondly, and Valentian Reports is kinda of a sequel to it where I dived a bit into every character!

I'm especially proud of the Secret Reports since I had the chance to flesh out Mila and Duma more, I really wish there was more discussion about the two but they're sadly glossed over, so I'm glad I could pick up the slack a little bit!

(oh, and speaking of picking up the slack, I'm the first one who wrote a proper Faye/Rinea fic on AO3 and I will keep bragging about that)

#ask replies #iturbide #my rambles #my writings #i'm in a pretty good mood writing-wise right now!#haven't written almost anything after publishing valentian reports but i DO have some plans #like a very early draft for a fic about a certain case #and some things that aren't even fanfics but something much more ambitious #hopefully i can show you some teasers in the future!

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3d10fire-damage · 7 months

Text

Colors That Run Highlights 63

there's weed in this one

Zoroe loaded up the party with some mom-rations and they were on their way back to Calamity-- and thanks to Kattie's forethought, they were teleported to the other side of the river, no navigating water required. Upon their return to the awful air, Fea and Kattie were unwell with chaos, but luckily nothing unfortunate ended up happening. Travel toward Destran resumed, and the party began seeing those big fissures in the ground that Romper told them to stay far away from. Black particles billowed up from the fissures, very nasty, very Hyrule depths.

That night, once Avi set up the Tiny Hut, Calypso got out Slim's weed and hotboxed the hut like it was a college dorm room. Everyone got nice and baked, especially Sven, who started speaking Common(?) from the Mary Jane of it all.

Valor, for far from the last time, wisecracked Calypso within an inch of her life, saying, "Calypso, you are as dumb as your weed is wet and not dank." Fea, offended on Calypso's part (she was just laughing her ass off), said "what did you just say about Calypso's weed?" Calypso figured Valor wasn't fazed by something easy like weed since rich people have those real hard drugs.

Things continued in this fashion until everyone went to sleep. During second watch, Avi began hearing the sounds of a struggle-- a humanoid voice and some doglike snarling. He observed from afar for a short while before waking the others to go help the woman fighting for her life (if Avi left the hut it would be dispelled, so he had to stay put). Valor and Kattie failed their saves against the bad air, but their subsequent violent impulses actually led to the quick and dry defeat of the woman's attackers. Destructive Wave is the new Shatter, basically. With that done, Valor declared Calamity a "bastard place" and went back to bed. Turns out, the woman was Oremol! The lantern-headed performer the group met at Festivista.

Fea invited Oremol into the Tiny Hut and Calypso healed her a bit. Discussion ensued, and it was revealed/recalled that Oremol was actually Pale Night's daughter. Calypso wondered who Oremol's father was, then, and when Oremol explained she doesn't have one, Calypso concluded that Pale Night fucked herself to produce a baby.

But on a more serious note, Oremol explained that she had a dream that her mother offered her anything she could want, which was concerning since Pale Night is far from a kind soul. So Oremol, sensing Pale Night's presence somewhere in Calamity (spoilers: in Destran), was there to talk her mother down from whatever crazy shit she was plotting or kill her if necessary. Lucky-- that's kinda what the party was also supposed to do. Oremol thus agreed to travel with the group and help them, should they find Pale Night. At some point in the conversation Calypso said more stupid shit and Fea "cornered" her (affectionate) and told her to go to sleep, but Calypso is a little shit and would not be silenced.

In the morning, it was the usual routine: prepare to fend off the Calamity fuckery, have some people succumb to it anyway. This time Calypso and Valor fell to the chaos, and Valor started going out of her way to annoy the hell out of Calypso.

Then Calypso threw a punch at Valor, which Avi attempted to intercept. He applied the deescalation technique on Calypso while Fea picked her up and held her by the back of the neck like a mama cat with her kitten. But Valor, still Befouled, let loose a string of terrible obscenities and spat literal acid all over Calypso, Fea, and Avi. Calypso would describe this as Valor puking on them. Avi then de-chaos'd Valor as well. Goodness.

Along the road, Avi had an idea of how to deal with Pale Night: to use Oremol's lantern attribute to capture and contain her Pale Night's essence. This was related to an object known as a Ghost Lantern, which serves a similar purpose. It was discussed if the group could build one as opposed to literally using Oremol (who knows exactly what would happen in the event she absorbed her mother?), and Calypso cast Sending to ask Billie if perhaps they could construct such an object.

("the goat can't fuckin' count to 25.")

Avi experienced something like a brain blast and came up with a plan and a series of spells to cast to prepare Oremol for inhaling Pale Night and neutralizing her. Calypso commented that it seemed a bit crazy, but Avi pointed out that it was ultimately informed consent on Oremol's part. Before proceeding into Destran, Kattie cast Death Ward on most of the group, and Avi set about prepping Oremol. Calypso made yet another joke about Avi getting really involved with a lady.

Destran itself appeared to be a series of caves-- primarily these carved internal structures and not much of an actual sprawling city. The castle of Destran appeared to be the main feature of the place, built into the tunnel-ridden mountainside. Great news for Avi! Not.

next time: the party gets fucked, probably

#colors that run #dnd

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ardent-convergence · 8 months

Text

SONDER

The 251st Roshane Moon marked an important turning point in his life.

Terra Nullius is a planet officially designated as a neutral ground safeguarded by the Pax Astra Confederation, where diverse races and species coexist without the burden of political biases or affiliations. It serves as a sanctuary for all who seek refuge or engage in interstellar relations, fostering an atmosphere of impartiality and safety.

Half of the planet's surface is basked in periodical scorching sunlight, while the other languished in a biting nighttime darkness. This rhythm repeats after a seemingly interminable 15-year span, and the OASIS has just plunged into its early nighttime phase.

The OASIS, is a vertical megacity, with layers upon layers of living, working, and recreational spaces stacked upon one another, teeming with technological marvels and a constant influx of people seeking entertainment, escape, and opportunity. The giant clock at the heart of the OASIS, regulates the rhythm of life for its inhabitants, dividing their activities into precise cycles with a chime at every passing astral hour. Louis is a habitant in its middle levels and central sectors, particularly in the urban districts within Nova Lardonlean City, or NLC, as everyone abbreviates it. Surrounded by towering spires and sidewalks aglow with neon lights, Louis navigates through the ceaseless hum of starships and the pulsating glow of the city powered by Ardentium.

Every passerby, every face lost in the teeming crowd, each of them carried their own worlds of emotions, decisions, and dreams. It's a feeling he's grown familiar with—'Sonder,' a word that captures the realisation that every stranger he brushed shoulders with down the bustling streets was living a life as intricate and meaningful as his own.

Louis had frequently pondered who deserved to have their narrative written and sung about in a world like Terra Nullius. Should it be the common narrative of someone average striving to adapt and find their place in a society where humans are the minority, much like himself? Or is it the story of a brilliant bovidae scientist, testing the limits of Ardentium's potential? It could even be the story of an ambitious and revolutionary Tattarine who challenges and rebels against the peace treaty imposed by the Galactic Confederation.

Louis never imagined that one day he'd learn that some stories demanded to be told, not because of their grandeur or heroism, but simply because they were the missing puzzle pieces which would complete the canvas of a universe where every individual's journey intertwined and played a part in the cosmic opera of Life.

On that fateful evening, he was on his way home when his thoughts drifted to Cecilia, a good friend and fellow academic peer at Alvores University. Their friendship had started when they first sat next to each other in a Multimedia Journalism class. Louis saw a genuine glint in her eyes as she talked about what got her interested in news writing and journalism in the first place, it reflected his own excitement. When he confided in her that he wanted to be a columnist for the Lodestar Prime, a daily newspaper, she fully supported him, quickly becoming the first to read and give feedback to whatever he wrote online.

Cecilia had recently claimed first place in a most recent local marathon. Cecilia had told him herself that her victory was one of the first she'd felt like she accomplished something major in her life. He recalls how her smile stretched from one ear to the other, and couldn't help but smile again too. She seemed so happy. As a fellow enthusiast of the subject and fellow human in an alien world, he felt that he should publish an article to spread the wonderful news of her feats; her achievement deserved to be celebrated. He wants to repay her kindness and support her in his own way too.

While he was lost in contemplation about how to convey her achievement, Louis meandered through the familiar streets. He took his usual shortcut. An alleyway that would eventually lead him to NLC's urban residential areas and his apartment.

It was at this moment that the trajectory of his life was forever changed.

The NLC's architectural design was meticulously constructed to direct your gaze up, never downwards. Perhaps because this was the first time he had ever experienced nightfall, he felt an unshakeable unease as he traversed the narrow, desolate passageway. He couldn't help but look at the towering high-rise buildings that surround him. The walls of the alley almost felt like they were closing in on him, yet it was also stretching endlessly towards the sky. And he caught a glimpse of the lively nightlife in the upper levels of OASIS, where celebrities and political figures made their homes. The neon lights dimmed and flickered as he moved further into the depths of the passageway, it struggled to penetrate the darkness that clung eerily to the walls in the evenings. The air was still and quiet, broken only by distant echoes of dripping water from a nearby leaky drainpipe.

His attention was taken away from the dazzling lights above as he heard a squelch. Louis could feel his heartbeat quicken. Having read enough detective stories of yore from back when humans lived on Earth and now living on a planet with so many different species of aliens, he feared the worst. But still, he looked down to see what he stepped on, curiosity getting the better of him.

It was sticky, and the liquid he stepped on spattered onto his shoes and his ankles. In the darkness he could make out its colour despite getting mixed with dirt, it was a cobalt blue, and oddly enough, smelled like a faint coppery tang. He followed its trail.

Rusty, long-forgotten crates lined the alley, their surfaces etched with graffiti, some he could understand as the Pax Astra universal language, and others were glyphs, symbols, and alphabets he couldn't understand. It was all smeared by the blue substance.

Louis continues to examine the blueish residue, his eyes land on a forlorn running shoe. He didn't stop there. Following the inky azure trail, his eyes locked onto a person's leg. His eyes widened and his body stiffened as he processed what lay before him—a motionless figure sprawled on the ground, bathed in the sickly light of the flickering streetlamp, the cobalt blue trail pooling around it.

It was when recognition hit him that he could feel a surge of hot bile rushing up through his chest. He managed to swallow it down, clamping his mouth shut as he collapsed back to the ground, his breathing shallow. Those signature blue eyes of hers were now dull and eerily still, her ponytail fell apart, and the oversized varsity jacket she always wore was ripped to shreds just like her skin.

Louis calls out her name, "Cecilia…?" his voice a higher pitch than usual, trembling.

His muscles tensed, his vision blurred, and his hands shook violently, clutching his shirt in a desperate attempt to prevent his heart from tearing out of his ribcage. Louis shudders violently, scraping against the asphalt as he struggles to drag himself away from the lifeless body. Yet, he senses something pressing against his back—a pair of legs.

Plip.

A blue droplet slid down and stained his trousers. He was well aware that curiosity had its dangers, as the saying goes, "curiosity killed the cat." But with him, curiosity always overcame his better judgement and thus led him to trace its path back to its origin. He strained his eyes through the shroud of darkness, gleaming blades came into focus, as well as a pair of bright, red, piercing eyes.

Every fibre of his being was paralysed with fear, shackled to the ground, but he managed to break free. Louis flees in the opposite direction but inadvertently scampered towards the lifeless body of his dear friend. In his desperate sprint past her, dread tightens its grip as he catches a more vivid and chilling view of Cecilia's once vibrant eyes, now void of life.

With his heart pounding, he sprinted frantically to the far end of the dimly lit back street, his footsteps echoing loudly in his ears. Once back in the bustling main avenue, he jostled and collided with other pedestrians, his gaze frequently darting over his shoulder. Desperation consumed him as he hoped the crowd could barricade him from whatever monstrosity was staring down at him in the darkness of the alleyway.

He kept running, convinced that stopping would be his undoing, even as each breath burned his lungs. But as he hurtled through the crowd, he crashed into a familiar face in the crowd, the impact was forceful enough to send them both tumbling down and send the drink clutched in their hand careening into another face he recognised.

Louis frantically cries out to them in between his frantic gasps, "Dominic! Detective Bradbury!"

Bradbury groans while scratching his grizzled beard, a wild tangle of grey untamed hair. He helps Louis get back to his feet and stretches his back, but resumes his usual slouched posture right after, dusting himself. The long years of investigative work had etched the story of his experiences onto his face. The deep creases had settled in the corners of his eyes, it deepened, emphasising the irritation in his gaze.

"What's your problem, kid?" Bradbury grumbles at his colleague's younger brother, his gravelly and hoarse voice revealing little of the concern that hid beneath his gruff exterior.

Dominic regains his senses from the shock of having coffee spilt all over him. His attire clung to him, his immaculate appearance as an inspector was spoiled by the dark brownish stains.

"Louie?!" Dominic barks, his exclamation held a mix of disbelief and irritation, expecting a sound justification for Louis' actions. However, Despite the annoyance simmering beneath the surface, Dominic's steely gaze betrays a protective concern for the well-being of his terrified stepbrother.

Louis quivered as he spoke, desperate to convey the urgency of the situation, trying to explain what had happened. He tells him what he saw, but omits the fact that the one he saw was Cecilia. Because it can't be her. She was fine the last time they met, she wouldn't be dead. She can’t be dead.

Both Bradbury and Dominic exchanged sceptical glances, their raised eyebrows reflecting their shared sense of hesitance and doubt. But nevertheless, with a few crisp words spoken into the device, Bradbury initiated the process of investigating a possible crime scene. The authorities would be on their way, Louis thought, reassured that the wheels of justice were in motion.

Subsequently, Dominic guided Louis to their familiar and hopefully safer, shared family residence. The apartment complex was equipped with state-of-the-art security systems that automatically recognised their biometric signatures, granting them access. Once home, Dominic swiftly changed into fresh, dry clothing, addressing his own immediate needs. Then, he departed the apartment, compelled by a sense of duty, to join Detective Bradbury in whatever mystery was unfolding.

In the distance, sirens wailed, drawing nearer, promising an end to the mystery, as they would be investigating the crime scene. Minutes felt like hours as Louis waited for the results of their investigations.

The harsh glow of forensic lights illuminated the eerie stillness that hung in the air of the alleyway Louis mentioned. Bradbury, Dominic, and the dedicated members of the NLCF's Violent Crimes Unit, assisted by drones equipped with advanced sensors, surveyed the area with furrowed brows and a sense of bewilderment. They expected a crime scene, however, what greeted them was an eerie void, an absence of the expected bloodstains and signs of violence.

"We're combing through the site, still, but it's as if the crime never happened," Bradbury explains through the communicator, projecting a holographic crime scene reconstructions three-dimensionally and reporting their current situation to Louis, "No traces, no evidence," he adds.

In his state of confusion and mounting frustration, Louis couldn't help but voice his disbelief, "No... That's not true. I'm certain I saw a dead body, I saw it all!"

After all, Louis prided himself on his photographic memory, believing he could trust his own recollection. But now, faced with the perplexing absence of any evidence, he couldn't help but question himself and the reliability of his own memory.

Dominic tries to reassure his brother over the call, "Louie, we understand your concern, and we take this matter seriously. But sometimes, these cases take time to unfold. Trust that we're doing everything we can. In the meantime, try to maintain your normal routine and don't miss any of your classes. We're here for you if you need anything."

"We'll keep you updated. Stay safe, kiddo," Bradbury says before he ends the call.

The next time Louis finds himself back in his classroom, he attempts to resume his daily routine. He couldn't shake the haunting image that had seared itself into his mind. The memory of that dreadful scene left him feeling nauseous and drenched in sweat whenever it resurfaced. Nevertheless, he resolved to soldier through the cycle while considering how he was going to tell his peers about the news.

As he made his way towards the lecture hall on the eastern side of the campus, Louis couldn't help but clutch at his chest again. This was the class that he used to take with her, Multimedia Journalism.

Louis pondered the unsettling prospect of Cecilia not occupying her usual seat. He held onto the hope that, at worst, she had fallen ill and was forced to miss the class.

Yet, an even more disconcerting possibility gnawed at his thoughts. What if he walked into the classroom and found her sitting in her customary spot? What would he do? Had he been delusional, imagining a gruesome murder that never occurred? The line between reality and his own perception blurred, leaving him grappling with a disconcerting sense of uncertainty.

With a deep breath, Louis enters the cavernous lecture hall with its rows of uncomfortable seats and harsh fluorescent lighting. He arrived just in time as the professor began to drone at the front, oblivious to the chaos inside Louis' mind.

As he scrutinised the familiar faces around him making his way to his seat, his heart skipped a beat when he spotted Cecilia in her usual seat. To his shock, she appeared very much alive, engrossed in note-taking and participating in discussions as if the traumatic event had never occurred, unharmed.

Louis quietly sat down next to Cecilia. She saved the seat for him just like usual. Louis struggled to contain the urge to vomit, he forced himself to endure the class, studying Cecilia from his seat. His stomach churned as he studied her, his palms were clammy, and he could feel a cold sweat forming on his brow.

His gaze drifted back and forth from the professor to Cecilia, unable to focus on the lecture. He couldn't understand how she was here, alive. Louis felt like an outsider in a world of unconcerned students, and Cecilia felt strangely distant to him. He couldn’t comment on how his peers were engrossed in their notes, their faces unburdened by the knowledge of what he had witnessed.

Louis questions his sanity. He can't be hallucinating right now, right? If the victim had indeed been Cecilia, who could possibly be occupying her seat now? What if, like a cruel joke, nothing actually happened; what he saw was just an illusion, and he was just doubting their friendship? He shakes his head trying to clear his mind, the very last thought was scary, and it would hurt him more than any other possible theory he could come up with.

Cecilia noticed Louis' distress. Concerned, she leaned over and whispered, "Dude, you okay? You're shaking like a leaf…"

Summoning all his strength, he stammered, "Yep, totally fine," He was relieved that she seemed fine, offering a weak and unconvincing smile. Yet, as he tried to maintain composure, he passed out.

Louis slowly regained consciousness in the small, sterile infirmary room of his campus. The scent of antiseptic stung his nose, and the soft whirring of medical equipment filled the air. A figure with deep-set eyes, the colour of amethyst, something typical for an Eldrathi, hunched over at his bedside. She is the head nurse, and her calm and steady presence provides a sense of brief security to him. She gave Louis one last thorough check-up, her hands were gentle but precise, ensuring he was fit to leave.

Cecilia had probably taken him there, she left a note wishing for his speedy recovery but also scolded him for giving her a major shock. He scoffed thinking the same about her. His head ached, and for a split second, he was back in that alley, witnessing the unthinkable. The vivid memory of seeing Cecilia's dead body clashed with the reality before him. A million thoughts and doubts consumed him. Did the murder really happen?

As Louis lay in the infirmary, he couldn't shake the thought that the NLCF was already scrutinising him about the whole ordeal. They must think that this case was just one of his crazy conspiracy theories again. Louis knows that every hour, every minute that passed without having answers would eventually drive him mad. He has to know the truth. To do that he has to gather evidence and solve the mystery himself; it was the only way to find closure.

Louis, growing even more impatient, set out to collect every scrap of evidence at the crime scene. His initial conversations with potential witnesses had given him a rough starting point, but he knew he needed to examine the path where the unspeakable event had unfolded. He rubs his arms, trying to fend off the unease creeping back to him as he stares down the pathway once again.

The horrors that haunt him persist, but so does he. Louis moved methodically, his gloved hands tracing every surface, every crevice, searching for any overlooked details. The darkness seemed to swallow everything in its depths, making his task even more daunting. Without the NLCF's glaring lights, finding evidence is even more challenging. As he surveyed the area, it became apparent that the crime scene was bizarrely spotless.

The meticulousness of the crime sent a shiver down Louis' spine.

Fortunately, he did discover one thing. Obscure traces of a fine, faintly luminous powder had eluded the NLCF's forensic unit, but luckily not him. He crouched down, brushing a gloved finger over one of the specks. This was his first clue, but he wasn't an expert in chemistry or forensics to know what it was.

He grabbed the portable molecular analyser he had snatched away from Dominic's desk and put some of the powder in it to be examined. The device hummed to life, but to Louis' disappointment, it didn't yield any immediate public information about the substance. The powder had a silvery sheen and was almost invisible under the dim lights; you could only catch it under darkness. It didn't look like your run-of-the-mill dust either, and it definitely wasn't something one typically stumbled upon in this part of town.

With utmost care, Louis gathered every trace of the luminous powder, sealing them in separate evidence bags which he also stole from Dominic. He's not keen on visiting their office, but it's always a good idea to share his findings with Dominic and Bradbury. He hopes they can bring a more professional and experienced approach to his personal investigation.

In their cramped, dimly lit office at the control force station, Louis unveiled the contents of his evidence bags. The atmosphere was tense, the weight of unanswered questions palpable in the room. Dominic and Bradbury leaned in, a mingling of caution and unease is evident on their faces. An unsettling awareness crept over them regarding the powder's true nature. As Louis explained his discovery and how he had come across the unusual substance, the gravity of the situation hung heavy in the air.

Without hesitation, Dominic and Bradbury acknowledged the importance of this finding. They promptly handed the evidence over to the forensics team for analysis and dispatched another unit to revisit the crime scene. The events had taken a sudden, grave turn, and the search for the truth had grown even more intense.

Just before Louis prepared to leave the station, he couldn't help but linger to eavesdrop on the forensics team as they shared and confirmed their findings with Dominic and Bradbury. What he heard sent a chilling shiver down his spine. The atmosphere in the room seemed to thicken with each passing moment. The powder was, in fact, finely crushed Ardentium drugs. The implications were staggering and Louis could feel the tension in the air grow heavier. The case might be considerably more sinister and violent than any of them had initially presumed.

Back at his apartment, the weight of the investigation and the revelation about the Ardentium drugs lingered in the air. Louis found himself in front of his laptop, its screen flickering to life in the dimly lit room. The cursor blinked expectantly on a blank document, titled only 'Cecilia'. Torn between two narratives, he pondered over the article he had initially planned—a celebration of Cecilia's marathon win—and the new, darker idea that had taken root in his mind—the mystery murder that now overshadowed everything.

Louis knew he had a choice to make, a decision that could shape the narrative of his blog and, in a way, the story of Cecilia's life. After some consideration, Louis eventually came to a decision. He couldn't escape the nagging urge to share what he had experienced with the world.

Seated on his chair, surrounded by the remnants of his investigation—spare evidence bags, notes with his chicken scratches, and the weight of the unknown—Louis' fingers danced across the keyboard. He begins to compose a new entry to his personal blog. It was a story that demanded to be told, a story that begged acknowledgement in a world where every soul carried its own vivid and intricate life. And so, Louis began to write...

"I've walked my fair share of overly crowded neon-lit sidewalks throughout the NLC and expanses of the OASIS. Amidst these bustling scenes, I've stood in awe of the towering spires and the dazzling holographic billboards, all set against the backdrop of ceaseless starship traffic and the vibrant, pulsating glow of Ardentium-powered cities.

Every passerby, every face lost in the teeming crowd, each of them carried their own worlds of emotions, decisions, and dreams. It's a feeling I've grown familiar with—'Sonder,' a word that captures the realisation that every stranger he brushed shoulders with down the bustling streets was living a life as intricate and meaningful as our own.

So here's my question: In this world where every soul carries their own vivid and intricate life, whose story deserves to be written?

Mine began to be written when I found myself thrust into the role of a sole witness to the aftermath of a violent murder."

#original character #S:AC #S:AC Cecilia Bradbury #S:AC Detective Bradbury #S:AC Dominic Z. Griffins #S:AC Louis J. Arscott #SsonnenbrillesS' oc

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