#it really helps with the writing process!

[teaboot]

Forgive me if you’ve already answered something similar but how do you deal with crushing guilt when you did fuck up but there’s not really anything you can do to like make amends or you’ve already done anything you could and still feel guilty?

Like I know the guilt isn’t productive at all, if anything it’s just paralyzing me, and mentally beating myself up over it isn’t actually helping anyone. But I don’t know where to go from there. Idk how to actually forgive myself, or at least be able to move on

CW FOR SELF HARM

Okay, so this is something I've had to work through for a very long time myself, and there's a few different strategies that I've used to cope and process with varying levels of success.

What I used to do was handle the "I've ruined everything and hurt people and am never going to be forgiven" feeling by hurting myself in a number of creative and stupid ways, from physical hurt (Everything you'd expect) to mental hurt (wallowing, speaking badly of myself, going over the bad thing over and over again in my head) to passive hurt (neglecting my health, not eating properly, failing to pursue good living conditions, letting others hurt me, deliberately wandering into risky situations) and despite any short-term relief or peace I got, none of it ultimately fixed anything.

At the end of the day, making myself suffer as retribution or apology didn't fix the thing I'd done and didn't make the guilt go away, and all it gave me was an additional sense of shame and isolation because now not only was I a garbage person, I was a garbage person with something to hide from my loved ones. Zero out of ten, do not recommend.

The stuff that DID help was harder and is going to sound stupid because *I thought it was stupid* until it worked for me.

First: Learn the difference between GUILT and SHAME.

GUILT is how you feel about your choices.

SHAME is how you feel about yourself.

"I was late to a date again, that was inconsiderate": GUILT. The issue can be resolved by analyzing the reason behind the action and planning steps to avoid repeating it in the future. Guilt is productive because it motivates us to improve our choices. Once you've corrected the behaviour, it's over.

A"I was late to a date again, I'm inconsiderate": SHAME. The issue can be resolved by asking ourselves:

What negative thing to I believe about myself?

What other experiences support this belief? What evidence do I have that the bad thing is true?

Do those previous experiences have anything in common? Where they actually proof of a personal lack, or did someone just tell me they were? Were my choices and actions understandable? Did I have a reason? Was I trying to hurt others, or was it a mistake, accident, or learning experience? Have I grown from that experience?

Can I forgive myself for the past? What do I need to do to forgive myself for those past events? Was I really at fault at all, or was it out of my control?

Accept that.

Your present traumas and shames often have roots in beliefs you had about yourself before the new shameful thing occurred. When you dig into resolving the issues that led to today, you can use those conclusions to work through tomorrow. This is something I learned in cognitive behavioral therapy.

There are a number of ways of unpacking these questions, but as I felt I was deliberately avoiding my thoughts and feelings, I chose to jump into them directly, and found it to be effective.

You can write things down, talk to someone, paint something, draw something, whatever. Whatever at all works for you.

My solutions was to find a comfortable place on the floor, sit down, close my eyes, and do box-breathing (in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4) while deliberately thinking about every upsetting memory attached to a specific bad belief that I could recall until I had nothing left to go over.

Judge and jury. Was I a bad person, or did I make a mistake? Did I have malicious intentions, or did someone accuse me of malicious intentions? Am I bad, or have I been conditioned to believe I'm bad? And at the end of it all, am I capable of better? Do I want to be better? And would a truly bad person care?

It was more emotional than I expected the first few times. Cried a lot, actually. But if I can liken it to a common feeling, it was like getting out of a very thorough shower and realizing you didn't know how dirty you were before.

The process sucks ass, no lie, but it's worth it. Like draining pus from a gnarly wound to get it healed up properly.

I'm not an expert, of course, but life has gotten better since I started. I'm better at forgiving myself, at least.

Also: Some people will never forgive others even for tiny things. Sometimes once you've done your best, you've just gotta say "fuck 'em". C'est la vie, mon amie.

Good luck, yeah?

♡

#Self harm cw #Guilt and shame

[vampzity]

spidey senses | J.YH

"when nothing adds up i’ll be your number, you’re 106 and i’m 94." — 200, mark

pairing: spider-man! yunho x gn! reader

genre: ateez, drabble, spider-man au, fluff, jeong yunho

synopsis: you were always very close with yunho, but you never quite knew who he really was whenever he made excuses to leave or cancel plans with you. as close as you felt with yunho, you didn’t realize you were close with someone else in the process.

wc:

a/n: i love spiderman. i needed a spidey yunho idea to be written so here we are ! mark’s new mv just urged my will to do it. not my favorite piece, but I really wanted to write it and keep it short! *not proofread*

[warnings]: cursing, really no other warnings but that

“Where the heck is he?”

You sat on your bed, annoyed as you continued to check your phone. He should’ve been here by now, but of course, he was late as usual.

You and Yunho were supposed to go out to a new cafe that opened in town. It closed at eight and the plan was to leave at five, but when you had checked the time, it was now pushing 7:30.

It didn’t help that today was the day you were planning to admit your feelings to him, determined to take the weight that’s sat on top of your shoulders for so long. You two have been close for some time, so what could go wrong? There was a chance he had felt the same, no?

You sighed heavily, taking off your shoes and jacket as disappointment filled your heart. This was the 4th time this week he had been late, or even a “no-show,” and you were tired. Just as you were going to lay down, a tall man flew in through your window, wearing red and blue.

“What the fuck?!!” you yelled, throwing your shoe at the figure in your room.

The shoe flew at his head, earning a groan out of him as he grabbed the back in pain. Your eyes widened at his suit, realizing the similar spider webbed pattern layered across it.

Did Spider-man really just fly through your window?!

The man sighed heavily and began to turn to you., rubbing the back of his head softly as he held his mask in his other hand.

“Dude, you know I come in through your window all the time.. why would you hit me???”

Your eyes widened as you two stood face to face. Your face in utter shock as he came into view. Did he even realize his mask was off? Surely, right? Maybe he wasn’t the smartest superhero everyone made him out to be.

“Yunho?!” you spoke, your eyes practically popping out of your head as his own did with you.

He quickly looked down, seeing the mask scrunched in his hands. It was at this point that Yunho knew there was no going back, and now he had to come clean. What excuse could he possibly make to you? Especially in such a quick amount of time? It was inevitable.

“Shit.” he brought his free hand up to his face, shaking his head softly as he realized his stupidity. “Well.. uh, let me explain myself.”

You rolled your eyes, shifting to the side in bed as you made room for him to sit down. He took a seat, sighing as he tired to explain the ordeal to you; from how he was bit, to when. How he had gotten used to his powers and ultimately decided to use it for good. It also brought answers to the billions of questions you’d have over his whereabouts, as to why he was always so late to hang out with you or even why he ditched you at times.

You punched him in the arm, crossing your hands as you sat there in disbelief. Yunho looked at you with a shy smile, unsure of how you may take the news.

“You idiot. You should’ve told me.” you mumbled, holding onto his hand.

He shrugged and squeezed your hand softly. “I didn’t want you to worry about me. It’s a big responsibility, you know?”

You nodded, standing up as you pulled him with you. You took the mask from his hand, placing it over his eyes. His face turned red as he felt your hands rest in his, still unable to see where you were.

“I was still worried about your whereabouts, Yunho. I hope you can learn to trust me.”

You both exchanged a smile as you rested your hand against his cheek. Pulling his face to yours, you rested your lips on his softly. Your lips intertwined as his hands wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to his body. His lips were warm against yours, making your heart beat out of your chest.

You pulled away from him, keeping your eyes low as he pulled his mask up from his own. He smiled at you softly, his hand coming up to your chin. He lifted your head slowly to look at him, kissing you one more time before beginning to speak.

“I don’t think you understand how long I’ve waited to do that.” he chuckled softly, his cheeks as red as blood.

You blushed, feeling your heart rest as he calmed your nerves with his confession. The weight you once felt living on your shoulders, was now gone. He did feel the same, felt the exact same as you. Your bond was too strong, not even a mere superhero confession could break that apart. It only made you stronger, and you were grateful for that.

“Does this mean I’m your sidekick?” you smiled cheekly, a laugh escaping you as he rolled his eyes.

“Hmm… I’m not sure..”

Yunho wrapped his arm around your waist, placing his mask back on and bringing you toward the window. He opened it, bringing you both out onto the fire escape.

“How about we go for a ride and find out, hm?”

You looked up at him, your eyes lighting up. You wrapped your arms around his chest and neck, holding on tightly as he prepared to take off. He tilted his head at you, signaling to you that he was smiling under his mask.

“Alrighty spidey sidekick, hold on tight.”

taglist: @skzline @evidive @xoxkii @vrtualsins @sanslovesblog

@dvrktvnnel @scarfac3 @honeyhwaaa @sundaybossanova @kittykat-25

@losrpark @yyaurii @aestheticjoonie @roomsofangel @mingtinysworld

@minghaoslatina @rvereri

*comment to be added to the taglist!*

—divider creds to owner—

#—♡vampzity #ateez #ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #ateez atiny #ateez oneshot #ateez fluff #atiny #ateez yunho #yunho x reader #jeong yunho #spiderman #ateez drabbles

[pinkflower2003]

Part 2 to the max fic inspired by the smallest man who’s ever lived?

“He Just Comes Running Over To Me”

Loss of my life part 2

a/n: this has been heavily requested, but honestly this is the best I could come up with...

Your heart pounded in your chest as you walked away from Max, his words echoing in your mind. You had to stay strong; you couldn’t let him see how much he still affected you. Your team quickly surrounded you, ushering you to your private dressing room. Once inside, you sank onto the couch, your emotions overwhelming you.

Daniel had followed you, his face filled with concern. “Y/N, are you okay?” he asked softly, sitting beside you.

You shook your head, tears welling up in your eyes. “No, Danny, I’m not. How could he say all those things now, after everything? It’s too late.”

Daniel put his arm around you, offering what comfort he could. “I know it’s hard, but you’re stronger than this. You’ve got so much ahead of you, and you deserve someone who’s all in from the start.”

You nodded, taking a deep breath to steady yourself. “I just need to focus on my career. That’s what I need to do.”

The days following the race were a blur of emotions and activities. You threw yourself into your work, writing new songs and planning your next tour. But Max’s words kept creeping into your mind, making it hard to concentrate.

One evening, you received a call from Kelly. Surprised, you answered, not knowing what to expect.

“Hi, Y/N. It’s Kelly. I hope it’s okay that I’m calling you, I got your number off Max’s phone” she began, her tone tentative.

“Hi, Kelly. It’s fine. What’s going on?” you replied, trying to keep your voice steady.

“I wanted to talk to you about Max,” she said, and you could hear the nervousness in her voice. “I know this is awkward, but I think you deserve to know the truth.”

Your heart sank. “What do you mean?”

“Max and I... we’re not really together. We’re friends, and he’s been helping me out. Her father left us, and Max offered to step in, but he’s not her stepdad. He’s just helping us out because he’s a good person, and it comes across that we’re dating in the media so it’s just a bit easier to explain” she said.

You were stunned. “So, you’re not in a relationship?”

“No, we’re not. Max has been struggling a lot since you left. He talks about you all the time. He regrets what happened, Y/N. He really does,” Kelly said softly.

You took a deep breath, trying to process this new information. “Why are you telling me this?”

“Because I can see how much he loves you. He made a mistake, but he’s willing to do anything to make it right. I thought you should know,” she said.

“Thank you, Kelly,” you replied, your voice shaking. “I appreciate you telling me.”

After hanging up, you sat in silence, your mind racing. Could you forgive Max? Could you give him another chance after everything that had happened?

A few days later, you found yourself standing outside Max’s apartment. You had thought long and hard about what Kelly had said, and you knew you needed to talk to him. Taking a deep breath, you knocked on the door.

Max opened it, his eyes widening in surprise when he saw you. “Y/N, what are you doing here?” he asked, his voice filled with hope and uncertainty.

“I needed to talk to you,” you said, stepping inside. “Kelly told me everything. About you and Penelope, about how you’ve been feeling.”

Max nodded, closing the door behind you. “I’m glad she did. I’ve been wanting to talk to you, but I didn’t know how.”

You looked into his eyes, seeing the regret and longing there. “Max, you really hurt me. I wanted a future with you, and you made it clear you didn’t want that.”

“I know, and I’m so sorry. I was scared. I didn’t realise what I had until I lost it,” he admitted, his voice breaking. “But I want to make it right. I want a future with you, Y/N. Kids, a family, everything. I’ll do whatever it takes to prove that to you.”

Tears welled up in your eyes as you listened to him. “Max, it’s not going to be easy. You broke my heart.”

“I know, and I’m willing to work for it. I’ll do whatever it takes to earn your trust back,” he said, stepping closer to you. “I love you, Y/N. I always have, and I always will.”

You took a deep breath, your heart aching with the weight of your decision. “Okay, Max. Let’s take it one step at a time. But you need to understand, this is your last chance.”

Max nodded, relief and determination filling his eyes. “I understand. I won’t let you down, I promise.”

As he pulled you into his arms, you felt a glimmer of hope. It would take time and effort, but maybe, just maybe, you could find your way back to each other.

The anticipation in the arena was electric. The crowd buzzed with excitement, eagerly awaiting your performance. Backstage, you took a deep breath, mentally preparing yourself for the night ahead. Tonight was special. You had invited the F1 crew to your concert, since they seemed to enjoy your performance so much at the last race. You knew Max and some of the other drivers would be in the audience, and you had a setlist full of songs that were deeply personal, songs that told your story with Max.

As the lights dimmed and the opening chords of your first song played, you stepped onto the stage, the crowd erupting into cheers. You spotted Max in the VIP suite, surrounded by his friends and teammates, their faces lit with excitement and curiosity.

You began with "The 1," a song about lost love and the one who got away.

"I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit

Been saying 'yes' instead of 'no'

I thought I saw you at the bus stop, I didn't though..."

Your voice carried the emotions of your journey, and you saw Max's expression shift as he recognised the story within the lyrics. The drivers around him were nodding along, clearly enjoying the music, but Max's eyes were glued to you.

Next, you performed "All Too Well," the iconic ten-minute version. The lyrics poured out of you with raw emotion, capturing the highs and lows of your relationship with Max.

"You kept me like a secret, but I kept you like an oath

Sacred prayer and we'd swear to remember it all too well..."

You watched as Max's face reflected the memories of your time together. The pain, the joy, the love – it was all there, laid bare in the music.

During "Enchanted," a song about the magic of meeting someone special, you glanced at Max, and for a moment, it felt like no one else was in the room.

"This night is sparkling, don't you let it go

I'm wonderstruck, blushing all the way home..."

Max's gaze softened, and you saw a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. It was as if the music was weaving a connection between you two once again.

During the break between songs, you took a moment to interact with the crowd. Spotting a group of kids near the front, you crouched down, reaching out to them. Their faces lit up with excitement as you spoke to them, making them feel special. You even gave them a few pieces of the costume jewelry you wore, them screaming as you did so. The arena filled with joy and laughter, and you saw Max watching with admiration.

The final song of the night was "The Alchemy," a new song you had written, encapsulating your journey with Max – the heartbreak, the growth, and the possibility of something new and beautiful rising from the ashes.

“Shirts off, and your friends lift you up over their heads

Beer sticking to the floor

Cheers chanted, cause they said

There was no chance, trying to be

The greatest in the league

Where's the trophy?

He just comes running over to me.”

As you sang, you poured your heart into every word, feeling the transformative power of your emotions. The audience was captivated, and you could feel the energy in the room shift.

The concert ended to thunderous applause, and you headed backstage to catch your breath. Moments later, you were escorted to the VIP suite where the drivers and their girlfriends were gathered. The room was filled with laughter and chatter, but as soon as you entered, all eyes turned to you.

Max was the first to move. He crossed the room in a few quick strides, his eyes locked on yours. Without a word, he cupped your face in his hands and kissed you, right there in front of everyone. The room fell silent, then erupted in cheers and applause.

You pulled back, slightly breathless, and saw the love and determination in Max's eyes. "I'm so proud of you," he whispered. "You're incredible."

Tears welled up in your eyes as you smiled. "Thank you, Max. That means everything to me."

The drivers and their girlfriends crowded around, congratulating you and praising your performance. You felt a warm hand on your shoulder and turned to see Daniel grinning at you.

"You were amazing out there, Y/N," he said. "You really are something special."

#formula one imagine #f1 imagine #max verstappen #f1 smut #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen imagine #formula one x reader #formula 1 #f1 x reader #mv1 imagine #mv1 x reader #mv1 #taylor swift

[thewertsearch]

FUTURE terminallyCapricious [FTC] 0:42:00 HOURS FROM NOW responded to memo. […] FTC: HEY BEST MOTHERFUCKING FRIEND. FTC: what all seems to be the motherfuckin problem? :o) […] CCG: OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD FTC: i'm in your future, best friend. FTC: I KNOW WHERE YOU MOTHERFUCKING ARE. FTC: and what you'll motherfuckin do. […] FTC: and also. […] FTC: i'm all about to be meeting up some friends. :o) […] FTC: i wonder if you can all be at with me in time and make me get my reconsider on?

... is it just me, or does it kind of sound like Gamzee's asking for help here?

Instead of directly threatening his friend, he's asking if Karkat will help him 'reconsider' - almost as though there's a piece of him that doesn't want to be trapped in a murderous rage, and it's trying to make itself heard.

Do I spot some ominous purple text in the corner?

I do.

Well, Terezi isn’t the worst person for Gamzee to run into on his rampage. A Seer like her will immediately understand that he's snapped - and she's no slouch in the combat department, either, so I don't think she'll be easy pickings.

Things might get dicey, however, if Gamzee pulls out the power he used against the Black King. We have no idea what that even looks like - but Terezi does, so she at least shouldn't be blindsided by it.

Anyway, what does our resident detective make of the dearly departed Tavros?

Before the full investigation is underway, a legislacerator will always have a chief suspect in mind. The one she will hold guilty until proven otherwise, a process customarily taking place after the execution.

That sounds about right for the Alternian ‘justice’ system. I’d ask what happens if a suspect is proven innocent after their execution, but that presupposes that Alternia even has a concept of 'proving someone innocent'.

In any case, a stopped clock is still right twice a day, and Terezi's corrupt methods have lead her to the correct culprit. What's her next move?

Above, you detect faint traces of what you reckon to be special stardust, such as the kind left behind by the flapping wings of a mischievous fairy.

I knew Terezi’s sense of smell was impressive, but I didn’t think she could go full bloodhound. She really is the most well-equipped troll for this new, more dangerous Veil.

And not far from that, you detect bright trails of white light. It smells... hopeful.

All three killers are in the vicinity, then.

... look at me, already calling Gamzee a killer. To our knowledge, he hasn't harmed anyone thus far - but I'm fully convinced he intends to, based purely on the strength of his most recent Pesterlogs.

The writing there was genuinely impressive. In just a few dozen lines, Hussie has completely sold me on the idea that the funny meme clown is dead fucking serious about violently murdering his friends.

#homestuck liveblog #full liveblog #act 5.2 #3361 #s121

[thebarontheabyss]

Hello, everyone. This one is quite lengthy, so feel free to skip it, but I feel the need to put it out there.

The next update is scheduled for the end of May, a deadline I can definitely meet ❤️

Anyway…

I've been writing this draft for months now, unsure what to say or how to say it, but I’m so tired at this point I’m just going to word vomit everything.

I live in Israel, an apartheid state that is committing a genocide against the Palestinian people. Having this opinion around here brands you as a traitor and puts you in direct opposition with 95% of the Jewish population. Especially in the past year, it can make you feel incredibly isolated. Being a leftist around here is kind of like being back in the closet for me.

I always knew something is wrong about this place, and so I refused to join the IDF when I was 20 (Just said i’ll kill myself if enlisted lol) But seriously, I was, and still am, ashamed of my roots and didn’t know how exactly to talk about it here.

Although my platform is extremely small, I still want to speak out and say that there are people in Israel who are not genocidal freaks, although we are a tiny minority.

In recent years, I’ve been trying to get another citizenship so I can move, but the process is long and expensive. I also lost my job half a year ago, which has made this even more difficult to achieve. In the beginning, working on the game really helped, but I eventually sank deeper into depression that I’m currently fighting against.

"The Bar on the Abyss" has been a source of solace and expression for me. In a way, this game is my way of processing and coping with the reality I live in. Although it provides an escape, sometimes real life breaks through the dam you create and floods you.

But my situation is nothing compared to the people of Gaza right now. Although it's extremely difficult to oppose the occupation from the inside, there are organizations that are working towards this goal. For instance, I support the ISA branch in Israel, which does great work.

I also reblogged a donation post today if anyone had the money and wants to help ❤️

Anyway, that’s it. I'm feeling really sad and exhausted, and I felt really guilty for a long time by not speaking about this.

I’m trying to cope with this reality, hope I can leave as soon as possible, and more importantly, I hope for the end to the occupation and the genocide.

Stay safe.

#free palestine

[haikyu-mp4]

So sweet

word count; 786 – gn!reader

Not usually favouring sports, you’re in the journalism club to make use of your great eye for design and writing. After watching one of your school’s volleyball team’s official games last season, you took notice of the boring brochures they handed out with the players’ information. You hadn’t yet chosen what to do for your project this semester and decided to lend your talents to making a better representation of the team’s charms and talents. What you didn’t expect to get out of the project was a date.

You received permission from their coach and captain and set up some equipment to take your photos in a room adjacent to the gym during practice. Hopefully, you can encourage them all to pose confidently. In order to not disturb their whole practice, you ask one grade to join you at a time, starting with the first-years and ending with the third-years. Good luck!

You had an easy job photographing the first-years, especially enjoying how Koganegawa attempted to look tough despite his soft nature. Truly a big friendly giant if you ever saw one, but at least he looked confident.

After the first round went so well, you smiled brightly and welcomed the second-years. “Hi! It’s nice to see you guys.”

Futakuchi smiled and started some light conversation on behalf of their group. He also took responsibility for going first. You laughed throughout the process, enjoying his funny comments and poses. Then came Aone, and you expected nothing less. However, he didn’t seem like much of a talker. You still smiled, encouraging him to show off as the most important part of the iron wall. After a few shots, you put down the camera, thinking for a second before looking at him again.

“Aone, you look very… sweet,” you said. If anything was sweet, it was the smile on your face. Sweet? You think he looks sweet? “Can you try a tougher look?”

Aone was flustered, mouth a little open in surprise. Truth is, he had seen you around before and found you so pretty that his face might have looked a little softer than usual now that you were staring at him through the lens. He still could never have expected you to think he looked too sweet, not after the years he spent sitting alone on the train because people thought he looked too scary. Futakuchi couldn’t help but laugh a little and was about to answer for Aone when he spoke up himself. “Sorry. I will try.”

You smiled, happy that he cooperated as you lifted your camera again. Aone wasn’t sure how to adjust, but he really wanted to impress you so he tightened some muscles and tried not to think about how much he wanted to hug or something, hoping it would make you happy with the results. You took a few more pictures and then gave him a thumbs up along with a bright smile. “That’s great! Thank you,” you said, sounding excited. This project will be so cool!

Aone walked over to you and bowed a little, which is what he often did for people he wanted to befriend. However, you thought he might be leaning down to see the photos, so you smiled even wider and took a step closer to him, holding up the camera so he could see the screen. His ears were red as he played along, trying to look more at the pictures than your face. He nodded approvingly, at a loss for words as he stepped to the side and gestured for the next player to step up.

You moved on and happily finished the photoshoot for the second-years, but Aone looked like he hesitated to leave. “Anything I could help you with?” you asked, tilting your head in a way that made the guy’s head spin. Futakuchi looked over his shoulder and slowed down a little so he could eavesdrop.

“You are very beautiful,” Aone said with his hands gathered behind his back. Now you were the flustered one, blinking at him before looking shyly down at your shoes and then back up when he suddenly bowed again. He was about to turn around and go.

“Wait!” you stopped him, resting a hand on his upper arm for a second before pulling away when he turned around, hoping you weren’t about to embarrass yourself. “Maybe we could go for a coffee one day?”

“Yes,” he agreed, seeming to consider his words before he continued. “Futakuchi also told me you need someone to help with the information on the players. I will do that.”

The two of you ended up exchanging numbers and leaving the scene with matching red cheeks, a date plan and butterflies.

the Flyer Series ║ masterlist

/taglist: @cottonlemonade @dira333 @cosmiicdust @nagi-core

#haikyu x reader #haikyu #hq x reader #haikyuu #fanfiction #haikyuu x reader #hq #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x you #haikyu fluff #aone takanobu x reader #aone takanobu #aone x reader #aone fluff #haikyuu aone #futakuchi #koganegawa #haikyuu!!

[bearw-me]

AAKSJDHJSJSJSKDKID THOSE BIG BROTHER ANGEL HEAD ANONS WITH ANGEL WERE AMAZING 😭😭😭😭 YOU WRITE AMAZING 💞🌺💖💝🩷🌺🩷🌺🩷💝🌸💝🌸🌺

Can we maybe have some angst ?

Maybe younger sibling reader defending angel from val and getting beat up in the process? Sorry if this is too much

thank youuuu!! 🩷🩷 + we deserve angst anon!

𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐉𝐨𝐛 — 𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥 𝐃𝐮𝐬𝐭

𐐒 ft : (platonic) angel dust x younger sibling!reader, valentino 𐐒 cw : angst, reader gets beat up, valentino is a warning, blood, swearing 𐐒 summary : as his younger sibling, you try to defend Anthony from his employer, only to face the consequences and be thrown out of the building. 𐐒 wk : 832 𐐒 note : been needing to write the reader punching someone for a while lmaoo

"Anthony, please," you begged your brother silently, all four of his hands cupped into yours, holding them close to your chest.

He shook his head violently, trembling "Come on kid, you gotta get the fuck out of here- And don't fucking call me that here!" he whispered hastily, eyes going wide when he caught Valentino's glare from across the room, threatening him to wrap it up quickly.

You watched broken-hearted as Angel ripped his hands from yours, pushing you back.

"I said get the fuck out of here," he hissed. But through the anger, you could see the hurt in his eyes.

"An- I mean Angel!" You corrected, still pleading with him, louder now, and growing more desperate to take him away from this hell he insisted on staying trapped in.

You didn't know why he was so insistent to stay.

"If you need money I can help you!" You begged, gripping his wrist tightly and forcing him to stop and look at you.

What you saw was not your strong, loving older brother. . . but a broken boy.

"Is something the matter?" Valentino appeared next to the two of you, his eyebrow twitching with annoyance but upkeeping a wicked smirk.

You frowned, trying to tug Angel closer to you to protect him, standing up to the moth demon who towered over you with his height, trying to intimidate you into submission.

"I don't know who the fuck you think you are-!" You began, unwilling to yield to the bully and pointing an accusing finger into the asshole's chest.

Then, Anthony stepped between you shoving you back and stopping your outburst in a second "I SAID GO HOME! GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! I DON'T NEED YOU HERE TO FUCKING FIGHT FOR ME!"

And he stopped, voice breaking when he saw tears spring from your eyes, never having been a victim to your brother's rage before. "Just go-" his voice broke.

But Val. . .

Val didn't want to stop the dramatics.

The pimp walked towards you, pushing Angel aside as he wretched your face up to look him in the eyes. A cheshire grin spreading across his lips.

"You know, your a feisty little thing aren't you."

"Val don't! Please!" You watched Angel desperately try to stop it, reaching out before Valentino's large wings shot out in warning creating a wall between the two siblings.

The pimp gave Angel another silent, threatening glare over his shoulder before he turned back to you. Smirking as he watched you try to squirm out of his iron grip.

"If you really want to get your brother out of this. . . you could offer me your soul instead."

You tore yourself from Valentino's grip, the pull so harsh that it left little red marks on your skin.

A wave of shame and guilt riddled Angel's body, leaving him trembling and tearing up as he watched you stare at him in horror. Your eyes popped open in surprise. Connecting the strings in your mind.

Why he stayed. Why Anthony, your loving older brother ever subjected himself to such torture.

Was because Valentino owned his soul.

And in one swift move, you stepped forward, summoning all your strength into your fist, planting a right-hook into Valentino's jaw.

"VAL DON'T" You heard Angel scream, his voice rocked with sobs as bodyguards dragged your limp body from the building, feet scraping against the tiled floor, a steady stream of blood pouring from your nose and busted lip.

"I said stay out of this Angel! Get back to the fucking studio!" The boss hissed, his wings unfurling and twitching with rage "You're lucky I don't fucking kill the creep," he warned your brother.

But all you could do was smirk, watching with bleary, swollen eyes as the welt on Val's face darkened.

"Fuck you," you breathed, spitting a mouthful of blood at his feet as he followed your escort to the door.

Val growled, hissing like the demon you saw him for.

Angel trailing weakly behind his boss.

The body guards swung the metal door open, lifting your arms uncomfortably high and discarding you into the cobbled alley like trash. Your broken body splayed out, staring up into the red sky for a moment, managing to sob.

"Val please! I'll do anything! Please! PLEASE!" Angel was at his mercy, crying as he watched you curl into yourself, hugging your broken ribs and fingers close as the door began to close. The mercenaries Val hired staying outside to leave a clearer message.

A warning to both siblings.

"Stay the fuck out of it Angel, baby," Val sneered, sliding his hand around Angel's waist possessively, pulling the spider's trembling body closer to him.

Angel cringed, the door open just a sliver now, threatening to close.

"I'm sorry!" he cried out to you. The sounds of harsh thuds and your cries to stop ringing through his ears, destined to haunt him for the rest of his miserable life.

#hazbin hotel #imagines #hazbin hotel x reader #reader insert #hazbin hotel angel dust #hazbin angel dust #angel dust x reader #platonic #angel dust x sibling!reader #angst #tw blood #swearing #hazbin hotel valentino #tw valentino #angel dust x you #angel dust x y/n

[scribblesofagoonerr]

— mission: chaos fc

↪ muchly requested second part to the previous chapter. I had so much fun writing the first bit, so why not give you guys a second part?

ps. there'll be more parts to this... its' not over yet!

Lets' go with chaos fc!

Thank you thank you thank you to @alotofpockets for helping me with the different ideas and code names, so much to write the mayhem!

pairings: kim little x reader, kyra cooney cross x reader

summary: just 2 best friends being pests together, and enlisting the help of the young guns to help them out

"Yoo-hoo," You call out as you open the door to Kyra's hotel room and walk in, plonking yourself down on her bed as you end up hearing the tail-end conversation of her phone call with Viv.

Ultimately, you know you should try and stay out of trouble. After all, that's what you promised Leah, and you really should keep your promise.

However, you're a known troublemaker and well, wherever you go, trouble tends to follow.

It's only a matter of time...

"Yikes, Vivi sounds mad with you," You can't help but joke and whistle lowly, moving back to relax on the Australians' girls bed with your arms propped up on the pillows. "How bad was it?" You question, curiously.

"She lectured me for what felt like forever," Kyra huffs in protest and slumps back down onto her bed, "It's bad enough I already had an earful from Steph and Caitlin!" She whines.

You wince a bit as you feel bad for her having to deal with that, "Well, if it makes you feel any better I had to deal with a right telling off from Leah and you know she can be scary as hell sometimes," You mumble, shuddering slightly, "And shes' even threatened to ban me eating sweets for a month if she finds out I've got in any more trouble. Oh and there was talk about a leash as well,"

"Right, so no more pranks then?" Kyra slumps her shoulders down in realisation.

"Well, Kimmys' definitely gonna be keeping a closer on us now," You remark, knowing that your Captain will have a watchful eye on you both.

The older Australian nods in agreement, "Yeah, and Steph and Catilin as well probably," She notes.

"Yeah-- I know!" An idea pops into your head as you bolt up from where you're lounging about on her bed, "We'll come up with code names! That way, we can lay low and cause trouble and none of the girls will have a clue that we're talkin' about them!" You personally think the idea's great and you know full well it'll help in your cause to be choatic still.

"That's geinus!" Kyra exclaims, impressed with your ability to think quickly about it.

"Well, you know, I can be pretty smart at times," You remark, jokely pretending to flick your hair back. "Right, we'll be known as... Eagle 1 and Eagle 2," You declare.

"Eagle?" Kyra furrows her eyebrow, confused by where you'd gotten that idea from.

"Uh huh," You nod in agreement with the older girl. "Kimmy will be Tiny, because well, its' kinda self explanatory," You tell her.

Kyra snickers at you making fun of your Captains' height, "Okay. What about Steph and Caitlin?" She questions.

"Caitlin will be known as Veggie, because of Vegemite and Steph will be known as Floof," You begin to reel of the different names, "Alessia will be known as uh, butterfingers!"

"Because of how clumsy she always is?" Kyra smirks at your imaginative nickname for the blonde striker and you nod in agreement, "Alright, what about Katie?" She wonders.

"Leprechaun, because there little shits like she is-- I mean, we're like that too, but shes' Irish as well so it fits better!" You explain your thought process, shrugging your shoulders, "Emily will be known as Fox, like the animal," You state.

"Simple but effective," Kyra remarks, keeping track of the different code names you're coming up with, "Cloe and Frida?"

You tap your finger against your cheek, "Hm, Laces and Magnum, Cloe's last name is hard to pronounce and Magnums' close to Manuum," You delclare, finding the situation amusing to no end, "Oooh. Teyah will be prodigcy, because you know, that's what Katie keeps referring to her as, and Katherine will be umm, Kool-Aid, like the drink!"

"Kool-Aid?" Kyra smirks in amusement as you just confirm your idea with a stuble nod of your head, "Oh, what about Vic?"

"Pancake," You answer without a single thought, "Cos' shes' Dutch and there's a thing called Dutch pancakes-- Oooh, I really want one of them right now!" You stare into space, thinking about them and all you want is one right now.

"Y/N focus," Kyra snaps her fingers in front of your face, trying to get your attention.

You jolt and shake your head suddenly, "Huh-- What... What're we talkin' about again?" You wonder, getting lost in your thoughts about desert already.

"Code names," Kyra reminds you as she laughs, "We still need to figure out the ones' for the rest of them. "What about Sarah and Jonas?" She adds.

"Sarah will be baguette, because shes' french... and Jonas will be Thanos," You're very adamant about the latter, "Because hes' a villian," You hadn't taken the news of Vivs' depature from the club exactly too well and you low-key would like to fight him at some point.

"Still mad about it, huh?" Kyra winces, remembering your reaction to Viv leaving the club wasn't that great.

"Don't want to talk about it. It still hurts," Alongside Katie being the head of the Vivianne Miedema fan club, you were a close second. You were devestated when she played the game in a Arsenal shirt for the last time.

"Pst, Kyra," You whisper and lean over your seat to not to gently nudge the girl to get her attention without being caught out by Kim or the rest of the 'responsible' older girls.

You're currently on the coach on the way to Marvel stadium ahead of the open training session where the fans would have the opportunity to watch you train ahead of the game against the all stars team.

Ever since the phone conversation with Leah, you had definitely been under closer watch and the threats that the blonde made were still fresh in your head as a reminder, and you'll be damned if you miss out on eating sweet treats, best behaviour or not.

But nobody ever said it was fun to always be good and you definitely weren't.

"Yeah?" The older girl turns her head to look at you.

"I have an idea of who can be the next victim of our prank," You give her a coy smile as you nudge your head slightly, "I say we mess with Laces," You gesture to the older girl whos' happily minding her own business.

Kyra smirks at your decision, "What've you got in mind?" She wonders.

You can't help but grin as you lean over the seat and cover your hand over your mouth to whisper to her, "We can sneak into the locker rom ahead of the rest of them. We'll hide the shin pads," You whisper quietly into her ear.

"Perfect," Kyra grins in agreement with your idea to cause chaos once again.

"What're you pair whispering about?" Kim eyes' the two of you suspiciously, hesistant to have even allowed you to both sit near each other.

"Nothing!" Your both quick to respond, acting completley innocent in the situation at hand.

"Mhm, make sure it stays that way!" Kim is less reluctant to simply let that answer slide so she keeps a more thorough check on you.

When the coach pulls up at the stadium, your quick to try and make a break for it, but your Captain doesn't seem to think the same idea, "Not so fast. I want you where I can keep an eye on you," She states, knowingly.

"Kimmmm, seriously?" You whine in protest, but the tight grip that she has on your upper bicep makes it difficult for you to break free like youn want to do.

"Come on," Kim pulls you in the direction of the press conference that shes' got with Jonas and Steph, forcing you to sit on the side where she can keep an eye on you still, "Stay there, don't move," She warns, patting your head ever so pratronisingly before she heads off to join them on the stage.

You can't say you were too fond of being forced to sit there and listen to the journalists ask questions, especially when Steph was poking fun at you directly for your bad habits of wandering off and getting into trouble. 

"This is boring," You mutter to yourself and slump down in the chair, while you kick your legs back and forth in annoyance at the situation you've found yourself in.

How long would it take for Kim to realise you'd got up and left?

Only one way to find out, you guess.

"Y/N!" Your names' barked loudly, causing you to freeze in your spot before you slowly spin around and try flash her an innocent smile, "Sit down!"

"Aw shucks," You mutter and flop back down in the seat, trying to ignore the stern look that Kims' giving you while laughter breaks out in the room from everyone else.

"Only our Y/N," Steph chimes in, amusedly.

You realise you're stuck now and you need to resort to desperate measures to ensure that the chaos still happens.

"Young Guns, your time has come!" You think to yourself as you pull your phone out of your pocket to enlist the help of the girls in the academy.

Y/N created the group: mission chaos fc 💥💣💀

y/n added kyra, mini viv and & mini katie & 4 others to the chat

y/n changed kyra's name to eagle 2 🦅🦅 y/n changed freya's name to godfather 😎 y/n changed maddie's' name to baddie 😅 y/n changed vivs' name to winger 🪽 y/n changed laila's name to ernie 🤪 y/n changed naomi's name to diver 🤿 y/n changed katie's name spencer 👀 y/n changed your name to eagle 1 🦅

eagle 1 🦅: young guns. i need your help! godfather 😎: uh... what's this? baddie 😅: why is my name baddie? winger 🪽: what's going on, y/n? ernie 🤪: i'm so lost. godfather 😎: heh, i actually kinda like mine... 😊 baddie 😅: speak for yourself 🙄 spencer 👀: why is my name spencer?👀 eagle 1 🦅: FOCUS YOUNG GUNS, I'M DEPENDING ON YOU!🫵🏼 diver 🤿: umm okay, i'm confused. ernie 🤪: yeah, your not the only one...🫠 winger 🪽: should i get one of the girls to come help you? spencer 👀: i think we should eagle 1 🦅: noooooooo! ⛔⛔⛔⛔ DO NOT GET ANY OF THE OLDER GIRLS!🙅🏼‍♀️🙅🏼‍♀️ i've been kidnapped, this is the plan... spencer 👀: if you've been kidnapped then we definitely need to tell someone! eagle 1 🦅: nooooo its' fine i'm stuck with mother kimmy and she won't let me out of her sight for the forseeable! i'm enlisting your help to join in on mission chaos fc, your time has come! diver 🤿: we should be concerned, right? godfather 😎: yeah, yeah... i think so eagle 1 🦅: your mission whether you choose to accept is up to you. the challenge is simple, i need you to go and hide laces shin pads. don't ask questions tho. do you wish to accept your mission? baddie 😅: whos' laces? 😕 eagle 1 🦅: I SAID NO QUESTIONS ooh right yeah, i realise now... uh its' cloe lacasse, baddie 😅: i'm down! diver 🤿: sure, why not spencer 👀: seems a bit risky... i don't know winger 🪽: we'll help you, eagle 1 🫡 eagle 2 🦅🦅 has entered the chat... eagle 2 🦅🦅 : y/n where are you? i can't find you-- have you been taken to the dark side? eagle 1 🦅: code names, eagle 2... i've been kidnapped by mother kimmy, the young guns' are now enlisted to help you out. i've got to go, my captivator is heading this way. good luck, live long and propser! 🫡 baddie 😅 : we won't let you down, eagle 1! eagle 2 🦅🦅: so long, partner... 🥲

© scribblesofagoonerr

#woso x reader #woso fanfics #arsenal women x reader #woso imagine #woso one shot #arsenal wfc x reader #kim little x reader #kyra cooney cross x reader #scribblesofagoonerr

[bunny-pancake]

The sun was setting over Amsterdam, casting a golden glow over the canals and historic buildings. You were standing in line at a quaint little café, your mind wandering as you waited for your order. As you reached the counter, you heard a familiar voice behind you.

"Hey, excuse me, but I think you dropped this," the voice said, holding out a sketchbook. You turned around to see Joost Klein, the musician whose songs had been the soundtrack to your life for the past few years. He wore a warm smile and his trademark beanie.

"Oh, thank you!" you said, taking the sketchbook from his hands, your fingers brushing briefly. "I didn't even realize I'd dropped it."

"No problem," Joost replied, glancing at the cover of your sketchbook. "Do you mind if I take a look?"

A bit shy, you nodded. "Sure, go ahead."

Joost flipped through the pages, his eyes widening with each sketch. "These are amazing! You have a real talent."

Blushing, you shrugged. "I love drawing, especially when I'm inspired by something. Your music helps with that."

Joost's eyes lit up. "Really? That's awesome to hear. You know, I've always believed that art in all its forms is interconnected. Music, drawing, writing—they all come from the same place in the heart."

You nodded, feeling a spark of connection. "I totally agree."

"Hey, since we seem to have a shared appreciation for art, would you like to join me for coffee?" he asked, gesturing to an empty table by the window. "I'd love to hear more about what inspires you."

Surprised but delighted, you agreed. The two of you sat by the window, the golden light casting a warm glow over the table. As you talked, you discovered that Joost was not only a talented musician but also a genuinely kind and thoughtful person. He listened intently as you shared stories about your life, your art, and the moments that had shaped you.

In return, Joost shared anecdotes from his tours, his creative process, and the ups and downs of his career. His eyes sparkled with passion as he spoke, and you found yourself completely captivated.

Hours passed without either of you noticing. The café began to empty, and the sky outside turned from gold to deep blue. Joost glanced at his watch and chuckled. "Wow, I guess we lost track of time."

You smiled, feeling a warmth in your chest that you hadn't felt in a long time. "I guess we did

Joost leaned forward, his expression sincere. "I don't know about you, but I'd love to see more of your sketches. Maybe we can hang out again sometime?" Your heart skipped a beat. "I'd like that."

As you exchanged numbers and said your goodbyes, you couldn't help but feel that this was the beginning of something special. Joost waved as he walked away, and you clutched your sketchbook to your chest, a smile spreading across your face. The evening had been unexpected, but it had also been perfect.

And as you walked home under the starlit sky, you knew that this was only the start of your adventure with Joost Klein.

#joost klein #joost x reader #imagine #reader insert #fanfic

[littlexdeaths]

i’ve noticed an influx of new writers who are not tagging and putting proper content warnings on their fics so i really feel the need to say this.

if reader is not comfortable doing something and has to be convinced, nagged or forced into an alternated state to do a sexual act— that is assault and coercion.

coercion is the act or process of persuading someone forcefully to do something they’ve expressed that they do not want to do.

writing dark fiction is gonna happen, i’m not saying it shouldn’t but we need to be responsible as writers and make sure we tag things accordingly.

especially if they are triggering topics.

to be helpful here are some things you should be including in your warnings:

• dubcon - refers to sex involving dubious consent. this indicates that consent is unknown or uncertain.

• rape/noncon - refers to a very obvious lack of consent for something.

if you aren’t sure of something, do some research. ask a friend (if they are comfortable with it) or don’t post it.

#shut up freak 🫧 #tw rape #cw rape

[genericpuff]

oh boy it's that time again

when rachel posts 'video progress' of her work and we proceed to dissect it like a frog in 9th grade science class

like ok first the caption of "is persephone the chicken and hades the egg" makes no fucking sense except to anyone who overthinks it and goes "wait is that a reference to the popularly-perpetuated version of the myth where persephone went down to the underworld willingly and hades didn't actually exist???" because if it is ima scream lmao

but MORE IMPORTANTLY-

Here's the transcript of what she's saying in the video:

"I think I've always wanted to write Hades' and Persephone's story because obviously I really like them. It's like very much a chicken and egg situation because I think in the beginning I thought that I was going to use a very abstract black and white style, and I realized it wasn't very enticing or fun for me, um... and I started drawing these very like vibrant characters and as I drew them I understood more about the story the more that I explored the art style, um and I guess an example of that is, y'know, Persephone is like a very bright color um, and the Underworld, is a very dark dark blue, and so when she says she really sticks out so it's just environmental uh processes like that that really helped inspire the direction of the story."

(despite her expanding on the "chicken and the egg" bit it still doesn't make sense imo lmao)

But what we're seeing isn't S1 LO, it's actually from S3 of LO:

But um... you notice anything interesting about the screenshot I just showed you?

That literally looks NOTHING like what we see in the final panel. At the VERY least I think this goes to show how overcooked it becomes in post-production, when they add the canvas layer and hypersaturate the shit out of the colors, but even the blending technique just isn't matching up?

A lot of what she's doing in this video also feels very... non-existent, like she's brushing her pen around but very little is happening so it feels more like her just putting down random brush strokes to try and make it seem put-together but really she's just kind of pushing colors around and/or doing nothing. Especially when, again, what she's painting here looks nothing like the final picture (so at best it's a lot of wasted work??)

And knowing what we know about the assistants drawing the characters separately so that Rachel can rearrange them in the final episode layout... I don't wanna call foul play here, but this feels like yet another attempt on Rachel's behalf to make her process seem more involved than it is by simply redrawing a scene for the performative aspect of it all. It's like the "sketches" in the books looking way too 'clean' for the final product and giving the impression that she just sketched over the final panels to make them look pretty enough for print.

I also wanna mention that for some reason she's drawing this on her iPad when she owns a Cintiq. It could be because she was drawing this while abroad in the US for her conventions last fall, but despite clearly being ahead of schedule, she still wound up drawing the final episode the night of-

Oh yeah and btw there are like a million clipping layers for what looks like just a simple drawing of Demeter. And this lines up with our previous theories about her using like 128549021809 layers for literally one character.

And aside from all that her commentary, as always, is very nothingburger, just a bunch of word salad. Like she's literally trying to explain LO's color theory as "well Persephone is bright pink and the Underworld is dark blue so she sticks out! That's all you need to know!"

IDK, I'm not coming to any sort of ironclad conclusion based off this one video, but it does feel like yet another desperate attempt to prove that she does work on LO and doesn't just leave it all to her assistants to do at the last minute. But like... she's kind of screwed in that argument either way, because even if she draws the majority of panels in LO, that just further proves the argument that she's stopped trying.

#lore olympus critical #anti lore olympus #lo critical

[cripplecharacters]

had to shorten this a bit: What are some thoughts on able bodied people writing a character who becomes disabled through an accident? In this instance a person in a wheelchair. I understand that this is often a tried trope which focuses on the characters “misery of being in a wheelchair” or can devolve into inspiration porn where the person is “cured” Might this fall under the category of “this is a tired cliche Maybe don’t” or can it be done if it’s approached with care and well researched?

Hi!

I believe that it can be done, sometimes quite easily so. While it is somewhat of a trope, for some disabilities more than others, people do become disabled through accidents. That's just a fact, rather hard to argue with that.

The main issue is related to the fact that a lot of abled writers merge the accident - usually an at least unpleasant experience - and the disability into the same thing. As you said, it does often go into the "misery of having x disability or having to use z mobility aid" territory, which is a very tired trope.

I think that the easiest way you can avoid that is to not write about the process of getting used to suddenly being disabled. For example, maybe the accident was years ago, or it happened when they were too young to remember, maybe the traumatic scenario is not even described (it doesn't have to be, really - most people don't love just talking about them for the fun of it). So then the character is disabled through an accident, but you don't have to write about them getting used to the new changes - that's generally better left to disabled writers because it's often very nuanced territory.

The second, harder way would be just "get a sensitivity reader, and go from there". If you do want to write about the process, you need someone to help you with that, in my opinion at least.

Last thing would be that the "accident trope" is, at least in my experience, overrepresented in fiction about disability. This doesn't mean it doesn't have its place, of course, but disability is inherently diverse - most people don't get theirs due to accidents. It's basically always a good idea to add a second (or third, fourth, etc.) disabled character to have that diversity shown! For your character specifically, maybe they're a wheelchair user because of an accident, but they would almost definitely know more people like them and a lot of them would have different reasons for using it - maybe they could have spina bifida, multiple sclerosis, chronic fatigue syndrome, or rheumatoid arthritis, or polio, or a million other things. Especially someone who acquired their disability later in life would have community ties, because they would need to quickly learn to navigate a ton of new things, and you need to learn that from someone. Try to think of the community around them - it's a much better thing to focus on rather than just "misery from being disabled".

I hope this helps! :-)

mod Sasza

#mod sasza #anonymous #tropes #acquired disability

[e-dubbc11]

Carrying On Pt. 2

Photos are not mine. They are courtesy of Pinterest/Google.

Pairing: “Retired” Dad Dean Winchester x F! Reader

Warnings: Smut! 18+ PLEASE! Or I’m telling on you. I’ll do it! Uh, so let’s see…fingering, Unprotected P in V smexy time(be safe out there), swearing, hunter violence, fluffy bunnies and unicorns

Word Count: 6.9K-ish (sorry it’s a little long, I really got goin)

Summary: Continued from Part 1. If you haven’t read it or need a refresher, I’ll leave it linked HERE

You and Dean have to figure out who the spirits are that are haunting his home and you become closer in the process

A/N: Soooooo this one got away from me, I hope you like long ones! I really like writing for Dean. It’s a lot of fun, he’s super smexy and I would be willing to write for these three again or just Dean in general. Anyway, I hope you like it! ♥️

As always, thank you for reading!  I appreciate it so much and comments, reblogs are welcome and encouraged. Don’t be shy to tell me your favorite part. 💕💕 💕

After the ghosts disappeared, a teary-eyed Charlie asked you, “What’s happening, y/n? What were those things?”

The scared tone of his little voice broke your heart. Glancing over at Dean who still had the shotgun in his hand, you then turned back to Charlie and replied, “Your dad really didn’t tell you anything, huh? About what he used to do?”

Dean glared at you, his mouth twisted in anger, but when he looked over at his son and he saw how scared Charlie was, his hardened expression softened.

“I didn’t want to have to do this, y/n.” Said Dean in a stern tone.

You wiped the tear away from Charlie’s cheek and squeezed his shoulder.

“Stay right there, Charlie. I’m gonna talk to your dad for a minute. You’re safe, buddy. I promise.” You said, trying to smile.

You pulled Dean into the kitchen by his shirt who was still on high alert from the spirits that had just paid you all a visit. Both of them were gone…for now. But they would be back and you had to find out who they were to be able to get rid of them permanently.

“Dean…Charlie’s scared. How could you not tell him anything?” You asked.

Dean tried to whisper as best he could while he swiped the palm of his hand against his forehead.

“Because I didn’t think I would have to, ok?!” He snapped back.

You took a step back away from him, frustrated with the tone he was taking with you but you didn’t back down. Reaching for him, you gently held onto his shirt and said, “Hey…hey, Dean look at me.”

His eyes were like fresh spring leaves when the sunlight would filter through them and they were fixated on you, confused, and he wasn’t sure of what to do next. The one thing he wanted to protect his son from and he couldn’t do it. His past had finally caught up with him but you couldn’t help but wonder if this was partially your fault. Maybe those spirits had attached themselves to you and you brought them here? You were going to figure this out but you needed his help.

“You’re gonna have to tell him, ok? And figure out what they want…they came straight for me, did you notice that too or did I imagine that?” You asked.

Dean pressed his lips together and nodded. “Yeah, I noticed that. Times like this, I wish Sam was here. He was so much better at research than I was.”

“Don’t worry about that, I’ll look into it. I was always the one that did the research for my dad anyway. Just talk to Charlie ok? Here…” You took the gun away from him and replaced it with two slices of apple pie. “You’re gonna be fine.” You said, kissing him on the cheek.

Charlie called out from the dining room, “Dad? Y/n?”

You walked over to him and replied, “Go sit with your dad, buddy. He’s gonna tell you some stories while you eat your pie, ok? I’m going to go get my laptop, I’ll be back.”

As you opened the front door, Charlie asked, “Y/n? Can you bring Bear with you when you come back…please?”

Bear was your German Shepherd you rescued from the pound not too long after you settled into your new home. Charlie absolutely adored him.

“Sure, buddy. Listen to your dad, and I’ll be right back.” You replied.

Bear was waiting behind the door when you came home. His giant paws touched your shoulders when he stood on his hind legs as he tried to lick your face.

“Ok…ok…down…down. I gotta get my laptop, buddy. You wanna go see Charlie? Yeah? Come on Bear, let’s go!” You said, grabbing your laptop and his leash.

Charging through the front door, Bear ran over to Charlie and Dean. Charlie gave him a piece of the hamburger that he didn’t eat.

“Y/n!!! Dad said he used to hunt monsters with Uncle Sam! And he said that he was around my age when Grandpa started taking him hunting!” Charlie said excitedly.

Looking at the table, you noticed that their pie was all gone, Dean had a more relaxed look on his face, and he winked at you which made your stomach flutter and warmth flush across your cheeks.

“Yeah? And what do you think of all that?” You asked him.

Charlie shrugged. “Eh, it’s still a little scary but I know you and Dad will protect me, right?”

“Of course we will, buddy. Go take a shower and get ready for bed, ok?” Said Dean.

“Ok Dad…Come on, Bear!” Yelled Charlie.

Bear chased after him down the hallway as you opened up your laptop and started your investigation.

“You may not get Bear back, you know that right?” Said Dean.

You chuckled as your fingers lightly hit the keyboard. “If it means Charlie feels safer then I guess it’s a small price to pay. I still wanna visit him though.” You said with a warm smile.

You continued to search the internet for information about the house, the area, or any newspaper articles that might be helpful while Dean cleaned up in the kitchen and Charlie was getting ready for bed.

After his shower, Charlie came back into the living room to say goodnight.

“Y/n? Can I tell you something?” He whispered.

Dean was still cleaning.

Closing the laptop slightly, you replied, “Of course you can, Charlie. What is it?”

Charlie glanced over his shoulder to make sure his dad was still in the kitchen.

“I’ve seen those ghosts before.” He said, shyly.

Confused and shocked, you said, “You…you have? Where Charlie? Where have you seen them before?”

“Here…they’ve always been here. Since I was really little. They would wave and smile at me sometimes. They’re sisters, well they look like sisters, anyway. Their clothes look funny too.” He said.

You whispered back, “Have they ever hurt you? Or tried to?”

Charlie vigorously shook his head. “No…No, they were always nice to me. And they were always nice to my…my mom. She didn’t know they were there though and they told me not to say anything to my dad.”

You covered your mouth with your hand and felt all the color drain from your face. The hand you had covered your mouth with was shaking slightly and the hair on the back of your neck was raised.

You came to the conclusion they didn’t like you or want you in the house.

Tears pricked the back of your eyes and you desperately tried to keep them from falling for Charlie’s sake.

“Ok, buddy. Well thank you for telling me. Bear can stay with you in your room tonight if you want.” You said with a hitch in your voice.

Full of excitement, Charlie jumped and asked, “Really?!! Thank you, y/n!!”

Dean called out to Charlie, “Alright buddy, say goodnight to y/n and get in bed. I’ll come in in a minute. Did you thank her for letting you keep Bear for the night?”

You smiled and said, “He did, baby.”

Dean tucked Charlie into bed, grabbed two beers from the fridge, handed one to you, and sat down across from you on the other couch. You felt him staring at you with a sly smile on his face. He just watched as you tried to dig up any information you could.

He finally broke the silence when he said, “You look really cute in your glasses.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Thank you, handsome. It’s just the blue light bothers my eyes; I don’t need them to see.” You replied.

“Find anything? I’m sorry, I don’t mean to bother you.” He said apologetically.

The dull ache in your chest from when you were talking to Charlie, persisted and your hands started to shake again. You didn’t know who these spirits were but you did know that they approved of Dean’s wife, not you. They let the family live there for years without letting themselves be seen except by Charlie but as soon as you walk into their lives, they’re trying to get rid of you.

Suddenly, it was difficult to breathe. Your chest felt like it was constricting tighter and tighter until it felt like your heart was being crushed or collapsing in on itself so you placed your laptop on the couch and got up to leave.

“I should go.” You said, voice shaking and with tears in your eyes.

Dean set his beer down on the coffee table and chased after you, cutting you off before you could reach the door.

“No…wait, baby. Why? I mean, aside from the ghosts and everything, I thought we were havin’ a good night.” He said.

Your voice was cracking and your breathing was very shallow as you inhaled sharply.

“They don’t want me here, Dean. It’s me, I’m the reason they showed themselves tonight!” You cried out.

Confused, Dean narrowed his eyes and pulled his brows together and replied, “Wait, what are you talkin’ about, sweetheart?!”

You told him everything Charlie had told you. At first he was angry that Charlie had never mentioned it before now but then upset because of how that made you feel.

“I loved my wife, y/n.” Said Dean. “Ok? And I always will but she’s gone. She’s gone and never coming back and yeah I’ll always have a piece of her in Charlie but I get lonely too. And then I met you and…” He paused. “And I felt something again. I wasn’t sure what that something was at first but, you made me smile again, you made me laugh, and I felt…” He stopped again.

It was silent for a what seemed like hours although it was only a minute.

You said in barely more than a whisper, “Dean?”

He clumsily blurted out, “Love…I felt love again, y/n. With…for…you. Son of a bitch, I can’t even get the words out.”

A shy smile stretched across your lips and you replied, “Really?”

Dean quickly closed the gap between your bodies until you were sharing the same air. With his hand cradling your head, his lips crashed onto yours as you gripped his head firmly not wanting to let him go.

Your lips parted as his mouth slanted over yours, his kisses were all tongue and teeth as he nipped at your jaw, your chin, and down the sides of your neck as soft whispers of his name escaped your lips like a muffled prayer.

With a fistful of your hair in his grasp, he pulled your head away from his lips to growl against your mouth, “I love you…and I don’t want you to leave.”

With a piercing dryness in your throat, you gasped against his mouth and with your body molded against his, you replied, “I-I love you too.”

And you meant it. You loved him from the minute his lips touched yours that very first time. Delightful sparks had raced up and down your spine and you thought your heart was going to explode from your chest.

Being on the road all the time, there was never anyone special, no one that ever had your heart or anyone that you would actually let into your life. They wouldn’t understand, didn’t know what it was like doing what you did, plus you were never in any town long enough to have anything more than a one, maybe a two night, stand.

You weren’t sure that you’ve ever been in love before, but Dean Winchester definitely had your heart. Love was having someone who’s easy to talk with, to laugh with, and to share your life with and he was all of those things for you.

Dean reached for the hem of your t-shirt, pulled it up and over your head, and revealed the black lace bra you had on underneath. Quickly, you unbuckled his belt, palming him through his jeans, a strangled moan fled from his lips as you gently bit down on his earlobe.

You stopped suddenly but he continued to leave love bites down your neck.

“Dean…Dean…” You said breathlessly. “What about the…um…spirits?”

“I mean, they can watch if they want.” He said as you playfully slapped him on the shoulder. “They ain’t comin’ back tonight, sweetheart. We’ll do some more research tomorrow but tonight…you’re mine.”

His words went straight to your core, the ache between your thighs was growing hungry for him and silently begging for him to touch you. His calloused fingers danced up and down your spine as goosebumps stippled across your skin and the look in his eyes was primal as his ripped open the button on your jeans, nearly tearing it away from the fabric.

His talented fingers disappeared under the waistband of your panties, teasing your entrance with one finger, feeling how wet you were for him, his name escaped your lips again but a little louder this time.

“Ssshhh sweetheart. We’re not alone, remember? But I do love hearing you call out my name.” He purred.

He continued to tease you, circling your clit with his thumb and then adding a second finger causing you to see stars and stifle screams into his neck.

“We’re playin’ with fire, baby. Go to my room before Charlie brings Bear out here to see what all the noises are.” He growled into your ear before slapping you on the ass.

“Ouch! DEAN!” You whisper yelled at him.

Dean flashed a sly smile at you before practically chasing you down the hallway and gently closing and locking the door behind him.

Putting his fighting skills to use, he swept your legs out from under you and you fell backwards onto the bed. As your head hit the pillow, something hard poked through and touched the back of your head.

“Dean what is...?” You said, pulling the gun out from under his pillow. With raised eyebrows you held it up in front of him and pressed your lips together in a straight line.

“Oh like you don’t have one under your pillow. Hmmm?” He said as he crawled on top of you.

You shrugged because he wasn’t wrong. Of course you had one under your pillow. Old habits are hard to break.

“Ya know you didn’t have to sweep the leg; I would have gotten into bed willingly.” You said with a slight chuckle.

“Old habits, sweetheart.” Replied Dean, pulling down your jeans.

After removing them, his large hands traveled up your bare thigh to your ribs before his lips collided with yours again. His body fit together with yours as if you two were made just for each other, the rhythm was so natural with him.

His kisses traveled from your lips, down your neck, in between your breasts, and along your stomach until he paused just above your core, your body arching slightly in anticipation as you tangled your fingers in his soft brown hair.

His face disappeared in between your legs, kissing the inside of your thighs, nipping at that delicate skin before completely burying his tongue inside you. Dean placed his hand on your stomach to try and keep you flush with the mattress while he pulled sinful noises from you that you released into his pillow to try and stay as quiet as possible.

Your climax building and building like a wave before it crashes onto shore. His talented tongue caused you to see stars before you couldn’t take it anymore. You tightly gripped his hair in your hands, and let out a passionate cry along with your release.

“You really are trying to get us caught, aren’t you sweetheart.” Said Dean with a look of amusement on his face.

“Well then stop being so good at that.” You replied.

A wicked smile stretched across his lips.

“Maybe I’d rather get caught then.” He said.

You could see your release glistening in his beard as he stood up to remove his shirt, the anti-possession tattoo prominently displayed on his chest. Propping yourself up on your elbows, you watched him carefully as he pulled his jeans down. Immediately after they hit the floor, he was on top of you again, his hard cock pressed against you and your drenched pussy just begging for him to be inside you.

But you rolled and he was suddenly underneath you, knees planted on either side of his hips and grinding down into his crotch. Dean’s thumb tugged at your lower lip before his hand worked its way to the back of your head, grabbing a fistful of your hair again.

“You’re not the only one with moves.” You said with a sly smile.

Slowly, you lowered yourself down onto him. With every inch, he stretched you out, soft gasps escaping both of your lips until he was buried to hilt. Dean kissed all of the moans out of your mouth as you began to rock back and forth, slowly, making sure he stayed buried deep inside your slick as you started to grow increasingly tight around him.

“Fuck, you feel good baby.” He growled into your neck, biting down where your shoulder meets your neck which turned you on even more.

His movements underneath you became rapid and you came closer and closer to your climax pulling him out of you almost all the way then slamming back down onto him. Your breathy sounds of pleasure turned into the loud cries of your orgasm as you fell apart all over his cock.

“That’s it…come for me, sweetheart.” He purred into your ear.

Every time Dean touched you, his fingertips felt electric, and your skin burned with intensity. You felt it throughout every cell within your body as he moved with desperation. He was close too, gripping your waist as tightly as he could, and crushing your body against his.

A cry of your name fled from his lips as he spilled into you, chasing his own high just as you were coming down from yours. Dean smiled against your lips when they crashed against yours and he brushed a stray hair away from your face. Clinging to him tightly, your mouth slanted over his, kissing his lips, his cheeks, and his forehead.

With you still on top of him, Dean inched himself to a seated position until he was resting against the headboard. Trying to catch his breath, and with a shy smile he said, “I really do love you, y/n. I don’t say it unless I really mean it.”

“I know, baby…I know.” You replied. “And I love you too.”

There was a long pause as you sat on top of him, still trying to catch your breath when you suddenly started to chuckle.

“What’s so funny, sweetheart?” Asked Dean.

You kissed him on the cheek and replied, “And you told me I had to be quiet. If anyone was waking Charlie up tonight, it was you, tiger.”

Dean pressed his lips together and slightly narrowed his eyes at you when you started to laugh again. Kissing him on the cheek, you started to get up off of the bed when he grabbed a hold of your wrist.

“Whoa…where are you goin’?” He asked.

Confused, you looked at him and replied, “I was gonna go home.”

He pulled you back down onto the bed, planted himself next to you, and said, “I told you earlier, I don’t want you to go. Plus,we have work to do in the morning.”

“They don’t want me here, Dean. I’m the reason—“ You started to say but he interrupted you.

“Yeah well I do, ok?! I want you here and that’s why they have to go.” Said Dean, giving you a quick kiss on the lips. “The only way I’m letting you leave is if you wanna go get your gun to put under your pillow…here.”

Biting down on your lower lip, you nodded as his hand slid up the side of your thigh causing a shy smile to play across your lips.

“I don’t think I need it tonight…you’ll protect me, right?” You said in a joking tone.

The smile disappeared from Dean’s face and the tone of his voice was serious when he replied, “I’ll always protect you, sweetheart…even though I know you’re very capable of taking care of yourself.”

You gently brushed his beard with your thumb, pulled him in close, and kissed him again. Dean parted your lips with his tongue to entwine with yours. His strong arms were wrapped tightly around your waist which made you feel safe.

“Thank you, Dean.” You whispered.

He kissed you on the forehead and replied, “Get some sleep, baby.”

**********

The Next Morning

The last thing you remember before hearing Dean’s voice was seeing vampire fangs dripping with bright red blood, their long talon-like fingernails with dried blood underneath slicing through the air trying to get at you, and your father screaming in pain while losing his life to save yours from that nest.

His voice almost sounded like it was underwater and very far away.

“Wake up, sweetheart! Come on, wake up…you’re having a nightmare, baby. Wake up, y/n!” Dean said in an elevated tone.

Your eyelids flew open, your fingers were tightly wrapped around the bedsheets, and you were calling out for your dad. You remembered what Dean had said to you before you fell asleep. He had said, “I’ll always protect you, sweetheart.” Your father had said that to you too and it cost him his life; you didn’t want the same thing to happen to Dean.

“DEAN!” You called out.

Dean pulled you into his chest to try and calm you down.

“You’re alright, baby. I’m here…I’m here, it’s ok.” He said. “Was it about your dad?”

“He died saving me; I let him down so that’s why I stopped hunting. He’s dead because of me, Dean!” You sobbed.

“Look at me, y/n. Hey…my Dad gave his life for me too, alright?!” He stated. “You think I still don’t feel guilty about it every single day?!”

You had heard about John Winchester’s death but you had no idea exactly how he died so Dean told you everything that happened and how hard he took it, what he did to the Impala, and how angry he was. It wasn’t until after Charlie was born that he understood the full reason of why John sacrificed himself to save his son.

“Obviously, I don’t have kids but I imagine you would do anything to save your child…anything.” You said, wiping a tear away from your cheek.

“I would and I know you would too. I watched you run to protect Charlie from those ghosts last night.” Said Dean. “But I need your help if we’re gonna get rid of them though.”

“I’ll go to the library later, should be able to find something there.” You said.

“Can I tell ya a secret?” Asked Dean with a devilish smirk across his lips.

You nodded.

“I’m pretty sure it twitched when I watched you use that shotgun.” He said with raised eyebrows and a slight chuckle.

“DEAN!” You exclaimed with a wide smile stretched across your lips.

His green eyes looked even brighter in the early morning sunlight as he inched closer to your face, capturing your lips in a soft kiss before continuing, “And when you said you were a hunter, that turned me on even more. The dining room table would have seen some other kind of action if Charlie hadn’t been there.” Said Dean, winking at you.

“Alright…I’m gonna get goin’, see what I can find.” You said, starting to feel warm. “Just keep Bear here until I come back.”

Dean gave you a warm smile and said, “Good luck, sweetheart.”

You returned the smile, hurried back to bed, and kissed him one more time.

You replied, “I’ll need it, handsome. I’ll see you soon.”

**********

Dean texted periodically while you were at the library. He told you he and Charlie took Bear for a nice walk, they had lunch, played in the yard, and he also noticed when they were outside, the basement lights flickered on and off. The spirits were getting their strength back and you still didn’t have much to go on.

Later on in your readings, you finally came across an article from 1868 about two sisters traveling from the east coast andalong the Oregon Trail with their husbands. You remembered Charlie telling you that their clothes “looked funny.” So they must have been a part of the manifest destiny movement, westward expansion, etc.

They had been trying to make it to Oregon but both of their husbands got sick, died before they got there, and they ended up in Colorado where they tried their best to live, farm, and just survive. They had managed, with help, to build a home very close to what is now Dean and Charlie’s house.

But it was too much for them, they died in 1871, six months apart, and are buried in the town cemetery. People in town had said they, more than likely, died from broken hearts. You sent the article to Dean and he wrote back he would “take care of it” tonight after dinner.

In a way, you felt bad for them. They had picked up, left their home, their life, and headed for the west coast with hopes of prosperity and possibly a family, children but they didn’t get the chance to do that.

Then a nice family moves in, they start to raise a son, and they probably felt an aspect of that family life they had always wanted but then the wife gets sick, dies, and leaves behind her husband and child.

So maybe they thought they would watch over the child since his mother is gone but then you came along and ruined it. It was just a theory though, who knows what the real reason is?

You mentioned your theory to Dean and he had replied with “Who cares why they’re doing it. They need to go, so they’re going…tonight.”

In his words, Dean didn’t do “chick flick moments.” It made you laugh but sometimes you wished he could try to look at it in a different way other than, “any monster=dead monster.” That’s just how Dean is though.

**********

“You sure you don’t want me to go with you?” You asked.

Dean was packing up the Impala. He made sure he had everything he needed…flashlights, shovel, salt, and matches.

“Sweetheart, I need you to stay with Charlie. You’ll see them disappear when I burn their bones, then we’ll know they’re gone. But you knew that already.” He said.

Your arms were folded protectively across your chest, watching Dean double check that he packed everything he needed. He hasn’t had to use the weapons from the trunk in a very long time, he might be nervous so you relaxed your shoulders and reached out to grab a hold of his jacket to get his attention.

“Dean…hey…what’s wrong? Talk to me.” You commanded as you looked into his sage colored eyes.

“I just…didn’t think I would ever do this again.” Said Dean, as he slammed the trunk closed.

You were still holding the lapels to his jacket when he snaked his arms around your waist and pulled you in close. With his body firmly pressed against yours, you could feel his heart beating forcefully against his chest.

“And I know that’s my fault.” You replied.

Dean growled. “Hey! Stop saying that this is all your fault. It’s not.” He paused, softened his expression and gave you a slight smile. “Well maybe it is a LITTLE bit but—“

You interrupted, “Dean…come on, you think I don’t feel bad enough al—“

You tried to escape his embrace but he was too strong and just ended up squeezing you harder.

“I’m kidding, sweetheart. I’m kidding. I’ll let you know when I find the graves, ok?” He said with a slight smile.

His warm breath brushed against your eyelashes, you nodded and inhaled sharply. He smelled like clean laundry and gunpowder as his lips remained inches from yours.

Dean slowly moved closer to your face, his lips ghosted over yours before he kissed you, gently and then he pinched your butt. A typical Dean move that made you laugh when things got too serious.

“You can’t be serious for 30 seconds, can you.” You said, chuckling.

“Nope!” Dean said with an emphasis on the “P” and a smirk on his face. “Alright, alright I’m sorry, baby…I love you.” The tone of his voice was warm and caring. “See…I can be serious.”

Rolling your eyes, you replied, “You can’t SAY you’re serious…it just contradicts the serious. But I love you too, be careful.”

“I will, baby and I’ll see you soon.” Replied Dean.

You watched him drive away just as Charlie called out to you from the front door asking if you would play a game with him.

You yelled from the front yard, “Of course, buddy! Go pick one!”

**********

With Bear sleeping peacefully at your feet, you and Charlie sat at the dining room table playing Uno. A couple of texts from Dean came in that he found the graves and he was pleased that they were right next to each other but it would take time to dig them both.

Charlie wanted to hear some stories about your hunting days so you told him a few that you felt like he could handle. He was a tough little kid, being able to sit there and listen to stories about monsters but then again, he was Dean’s son. It’s in his blood.

Suddenly, Bear started to growl and show his teeth. The lights all throughout the house started to flicker and it became very cold very quickly.

“Go get in that salt circle, Charlie. Right now.” You commanded.

Charlie got up, took the iron bar his father gave him and did as he was told. Bear sat outside the circle guarding him and still growling. You were holding one of Dean’s two shotguns in your hands and you had your handgun on you too when your phone started buzzing in your pocket.

It was Dean.

Just as you hit the answer button, the two spirits appeared and were headed straight for you. The phone dropped onto the floor when you tried to get a shot off. When you missed, you dropped to your knees to pick up the phone.

“Dean! Hello?!” You said loudly.

Before he could say anything, you watched as one of the sisters started to burn. Their bones must be on fire.

“Their bones are salted and burned, y/n! They should be gone!” He said.

“Only of them burned, Dean!” You said.

That’s when you heard Charlie calling you from the kitchen. You ran in just in time to see him swing the iron bar at the other sister and she disappeared but you knew it wouldn’t be for long.

“What is it, Charlie!?” You asked in an elevated tone.

Charlie reached into his pocket and pulled out a locket. Inside, were pictures of one of the sisters and her husband, you assumed.

Dean was yelling your name into the phone.

“Hang on, Dean…Charlie, where did you get this?” You asked, holding the locket.

“I was digging in the yard, playing with my dump truck, and I saw that sticking out from under the dirt! And when I went to bed that night, that was the first time I saw them in my room.” Said Charlie.

The locket must have belonged to the sister that didn’t burn up so she’s still tied to it. The kitchen lights flickered on and off again as you picked up the phone to talk to Dean again.

“You still there? I know what I have to do. I need a blowtorch!” You said.

His voice boomed on the other end of the phone. “Under the sink!”

All of a sudden, you heard Charlie’s voice but it wasn’t directed at you. It was directed at…her. You turned around to see her hovering next to Charlie, outside the circle, with Bear showing his teeth and ready to pounce.

“Leave y/n alone! I know she’s not my mom but…but she’s really nice! My Dad and me…we really like her a lot! Just leave us alone!” Charlie yelled.

The spirit of the lone sister almost had a sad look to her face, like she didn’t understand why Charlie would be upset, that she was just trying to protect him. But before she could disappear again, you had set the locket on fire and watched it burn inside the sink. Pulling Charlie from the salt circle, you shielded his eyes from the burning spirit and held him tightly against your body.

The lights stopped wavering, Bear stopped growling and began wagging his tail. You crouched down to look Charlie in the eyes, still gripping him tightly.

“Look at me, buddy. Are you ok?” You asked him.

Charlie nodded.

“Are you both alright?!” Dean asked.

“We’re fine, baby. We’re fine.” You replied.

“I’m comin’ home.” Said Dean, before hanging up.

Charlie helped you clean up all the salt and put the guns away.

“Charlie…how did you know to give me that locket?” You asked.

He threw the last of the salt into the trashcan and then answered, “Dad told me last night that sometimes there is something still holding a spirit to this world and if we get rid of that object, then they can move on.”

“Wow, you remembered all that, huh?” You asked.

He nodded. “Yeah.”

“That’s really impressive, buddy. I’m proud of you.” You said.

Charlie gave you a slight smile. It looked a lot like his father’s.

“Thanks.” He replied.

There were a few minutes of silence before Charlie spoke again.

“Y/n?” Said Charlie.

“Hmmmm?” You said, cleaning out the sink.

You could tell he was nervous about what he wanted to say and was working up the courage to say it.

“I love you.” He said.

You weren’t sure your heart had ever felt so full. You could hear its rapid beats echoing inside your head while the heat rose to your cheeks and tears burned the back of your eyes. You didn’t try and stop the tears from streaking down your cheeks this time; they were happy tears.

Your voice hitched. “I love you too, Charlie. Why don’t you go get ready for bed, ok?”

Knowing Dean had to fill in those graves before coming home, you knew he would be a little while longer so you had Charlie take a shower and then he wanted to hear more stories.

The kid couldn’t get enough and he hung on your every word before his eyes started to get heavy and he fell asleep with Bear next to him. So you shut off his light, closed the door behind you, and waited for Dean to get back.

The low growl of the Impala echoed from outside. It came to a stop and you heard the loud squeak as he closed the door. That sound was unmistakable and it brought a smile to your face because it meant Dean was home.

Covered in dirt, he practically ran through the front door.

“Hey! Charlie’s ok?” He asked breathlessly.

You nodded and replied, “Yeah, he’s fine. He’s in bed if you wanna say goodnight.”

He quietly walked down the hallway, opened Charlie’s door, and then closed it again. Dean emerged from the hallway and did not stop until his legs took him directly to you. In one motion, he stripped off his jacket, gazed at you with his sweet green eyes before his lips crashed onto yours. He tasted like salt and dirt.

“You ok?” He asked as he cupped the side of your face, fondly looking at you like he hadn’t seen you in a week.

“I’m fine, baby. I’m fine.” You said, looking up at him through your long dark lashes.

“I’m just glad you guys are safe.” He said, wiping the dirt from his brow.

Dean flopped onto the couch, his head tilted up toward the ceiling and he closed his eyes. He took a couple of deep breaths with forceful exhales.

“Are YOU ok, baby?” You asked timidly.

You knew Dean stopped hunting for a good reason but explaining the life he used to have to his son was something he had hoped he never would have to do but that’s who he was. Dean was a hunter. It was a huge part of his life ever since he was a young boy all the way through most of his adult life so far.

“I’m good, sweetheart. I guess, I knew I couldn’t keep this secret from Charlie forever, could I.” He said.

You gently raked your nails against his scalp as he sat next to you, looking up at the ceiling, trying to find the right words to say.

“It was a big part of your life, Dean.” You whispered. “And I’m sorry I was the reason you had to tell Charlie about it.”

Tears stung the back of your eyes and you turned away from him so he wouldn’t see them.

“Hey…hey, come here, come here.” Said Dean, pulling you into his lap. “Charlie said that these sisters liked him, right? And my wife. Now, if you hadn’t moved in next door, I’m guessing eventually I would have started dating someone else and the sisters probably wouldn’t have liked anyone that I brought home so I would have had to tell Charlie anyway. But I love that you’re a hunter and you were here to protect him. The point I’m trying to make, I guess, is I didn’t have to do this alone, I had you…I love you, y/n.”

A smile stretched across Dean’s lips as he leaned in to kiss you. His strong hands, that were covered in dirt, inched up your thighs then wrapped around your waist as he deepened the kiss, parting your lips with his tongue, wanting to tangle with yours.

“I love you too, Dean.” You said with a warm smile. “Oh also…you’re not the only Winchester that loves me, ya know.”

Dean pressed his lips together firmly and narrowed his eyes.

“Son of a bitch, I knew I would regret sending Sam your picture! He said you were too hot for me.” Dean said with a slight growl.

With your hands resting on his shoulders, you started to laugh, and started to swipe at the dirt from his cheeks.

“No baby, it’s not Sam…it’s Charlie.” You said.

“Did he give you Blue Steel? I’ve been workin’ with him, he’s gettin’ pretty good at it.” He joked.

You continued to laugh and shake your head.

“No Dean, not in that kind of way. More like a friendship kind of way, a really fun babysitter, maybe.” You said.

You told Dean what Charlie had said to the spirit before she dissipated and how he remembered what Dean had told him about spirits attaching themselves to objects and not being able to move on unless those objects were gone.

“He remembered all that? Smart kid.” Said Dean. “It also sounds like he looks at you like a mother type figure which he needs.”

You violently shook your head back and forth.

“Dean, I could never. Charlie had a mother and he has fond memories of her. You know I could never or WOULD EVER want to replace her.” You said.

Your hands started to shake, Dean took your hands in his to try and comfort you.

“I know that, sweetheart. I know. I’ve watched the way you are with him though and you can tell he really loves when you’re here and when you play with him. But I can see that you two love each other.” Said Dean, as he kissed your hands and smiled at you.

“I do love that little boy, Dean. I really do.” You said as tears streamed down your cheeks.

“Which is another reason why I love you so much.” He said.

You closed the gap between your bodies and gently pressed your lips to his. Tickling the back of his neck with your nails, you could feel the goosebumps dance across his skin.

“And I love you too.” You purred into his ear. “Well, I guess I should get goin’ and let you shower. You’re probably really tired from all that digging and you want to go to sleep.”

“We’re both pretty dirty, baby. I think you should come with me. Then we can go to bed.” Said Dean with a wink.

You couldn’t help but bite back a smile while looking into the eyes of the man who holds your heart. Love was the last thing you had expected to find in the small Colorado town you now call home, especially love with another hunter.

“Well, how can I say no to an offer like that?” You replied.

“Oh I don’t think you can say no. Yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s in the lore somewhere.” Said Dean.

The bristles of his beard gently scratched your chin when you leaned in to kiss him again, trying not to laugh. You loved him so much.

You knew moving on with your life after your father died wouldn’t be easy because you were all alone but that empty space in your heart was a little bit smaller now. You weren’t alone anymore. Both you and Dean had suffered losses, more than anyone should ever have to but you had each other now.

Finally, you had a place you could call home and more importantly, there was plenty of love to fill that home.

Tag List: @munsonownsmyass @gijos

Others that might enjoy: @jvanilly @k-marzolf @vaguekayla @fluffyprettykitty @imagine-a-fictional-boyfriend @ittybxttykxttytxtty @itwasthereaminuteago

#dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x you #dean winchester x female!reader #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester imagine #supernatural

[dostoyevsky-official]

hi i have followed the letby case very casually for years but yeah - casually - so i might not be up to date. for what its worth the post you made about the case was very illuminating, however i do believe that one of the biggest pieces of evidence was her journal where she wrote about how she's a monster because she killed the kids? again like ofc i agree that people write weird shit in their journals for whatever reason but i do remember that this was like. a big thing in the case. idk i thought its worth mentioning.

this was brought up in the article

The police spent the day searching her house. Inside, they found a note with the heading “NOT GOOD ENOUGH.” There were several phrases scrawled across the page at random angles and without punctuation: “There are no words”; “I can’t breathe”; “Slander Discrimination”; “I’ll never have children or marry I’ll never know what it’s like to have a family”; “WHY ME?”; “I haven’t done anything wrong”; “I killed them on purpose because I’m not good enough to care for them”; “I AM EVIL I DID THIS.” On another scrap of paper, she had written, three times, “Everything is manageable,” a phrase that a colleague had said to her. At the bottom of the page, she had written, “I just want life to be as it was. I want to be happy in the job that I loved with a team who I felt a part of. Really, I don’t belong anywhere. I’m a problem to those who do know me.” On another piece of paper, found in her handbag, she had written, “I can’t do this any more. I want someone to help me but they can’t.” She also wrote, “We tried our best and it wasn’t enough.” After spending all day in jail, Letby was asked why she had written the “not good enough” note. A police video shows her in the interrogation room with her hands in her lap, her shoulders hunched forward. She spoke quietly and deferentially, like a student facing an unexpectedly harsh exam. “It was just a way of me getting my feelings out onto paper,” she said. “It just helps me process.” “In your own mind, had you done anything wrong at all?” an officer asked. “No, not intentionally, but I was worried that they would find that my practice hadn’t been good,” she said, adding, “I thought maybe I had missed something, maybe I hadn’t acted quickly enough.” “Give us an example.” She proposed that perhaps she “hadn’t played my role in the team. I’d been on a lot of night shifts when doctors aren’t around. We have to call them. There are less people, and it just worried me that I hadn’t called them—quick enough.” She also worried that she might have given the wrong dose of a medication or used equipment improperly. “And you felt evil?” “Other people would perceive me as being evil, yes, if I had missed something.” She went on, “It’s how this situation made me feel.”

In an interview two days later, an officer asked why one of her notes had the word “hate” in bold letters, circled. “What’s the significance of that?” “That I hate myself for having let everybody down and for not being good enough,” she said. “I’d just been removed from the job I loved, I was told that there might be issues with my practice, I wasn’t allowed to speak to people.” The officer asked again why she had written, “I killed them on purpose.” “That’s how I was being made to feel,” she said. As her mental health deteriorated, her thoughts had spiralled. “If my practice hadn’t been good enough and I was linked with these deaths, then it was my fault,” she said. “You’re being very hard on yourself there if you haven’t done anything wrong.” “Well, I am very hard on myself,” she said.

if writing strange thoughts down was good enough evidence to convict, half of tumblr's userbase would be in prison

[stellarcat52]

This isn’t leaving my brain so here.

One final reset au.

Heavy spoilers.

It takes years, but fable’s soul manifests in the aether. As one final attempt to fix everything, or maybe as revenge, he causes another reset, completely destroying his soul in the process.

Disclaimer: I haven’t watched everyone’s finales and I don’t have solid ideas for where every character wakes up after the reset, also, spoilers.

Caspian remembers everything, but he’s stuck in Elysium with no way of getting back and helping his family or friends.

On the other hand, Rae and Violet are stuck in the end. Rae doesn’t remember anything about being mortal, including his partners, but Violet remembers the end stone reset and parts of the other two. He figures out another has happened pretty quickly.

Violet checks the end prison, which has returned, for Caspian, Athena, Easton, or (this name has been forgotten) but finds it empty. He won’t help Rae remember anything because he knows it will cause more stress to know that there are people out there that Rae loves that he can’t get to. (for the sake of this, lighting the ends portal in the over world opens the one in the end as well.)

Rae has Veah and Cari with him. He doesn’t remember either of them but quickly recognizes the resemblance and takes care of them. They remember everything and are very scared because Dad doesn’t remember them, even when he promised he’d never forget them. (They never understood why he kept making that promise to them. He’d promise them every time he had a bad dream.)

Ocie and Momboo both remember everything. It hurts, having everything taken away again, and they’re looking to reunite everyone and rebuild lodestar grove.

Quixis-Icarus can see and interact with the world, they try to push people into each other’s paths and they look for Rae and Centross endlessly.

Most everyone in the over world and nether (really just Athena) are quick to regain memories once they meet up with the others. A blessing from Caspian traveled on the over world wind, making it easier, but those in other dimensions weren’t effected. (Athena just had really good bonds with people)

Caspian is able to read everything his friends write down, Arisanna, Ven, and Athena unknowingly keep him in the loop. Rae also takes notes, Caspian broke into tears when he realized his husband 1- didn’t remember him, and 2- had their kids and was keeping them safe.

Veah writes down journals for her and Cari, Caspian reads them too and wishes he could go help them feel less scared.

Athena and Fenris make it to the end first and Rae doesn’t immediately remember them. Violet defends them but Rae locks them away anyway until Veah and Cari see and recognize them. Fenris calling him starlight and Athena calling him their uncle cause memories to come crashing back.

Rae stresses about making it to Elysium, hoping that Caspian was there. He builds the portal and is willing to give up himself to get there but Ven, who remembers dying, seems to be able to open it on his own without consequences. (Icarus didn’t want anyone to get hurt, they found the portal from the last reset. No one seems to notice that it’s one block off now.)

Caspian definitely sees Rae’s notes about ways to relight the portal and knows he’s going to try and sacrifice himself. He’s at the portal waiting when the plan happens and his first words to anyone are “Is Rae okay?” Because he was so scared. He makes sure everyone knows that it was fable who caused this reset, and that his soul is permanently gone this time. (He saw it happen. And he couldn’t get there fast enough to stop it. He couldn’t let the others find out he failed to protect them.)

Once everyone is accounted for, memories are fully back, and homes are rebuilt, there’s a huge celebration with everyone involved. (As the sun goes down, Oscar takes the other kids home to have a sleepover and Ulysses breaks out the alcohol.)

#fable smp #fablesmp #fable smp spoilers #fablesmp spoilers #not proofread #I’m not tagging all the characters #not everyone is mentioned #I think you can tell who my favorite characters to write angst for are #my writing #kinda #it’s a bunch of ideas without being written down as a story #it counts

[cmncisspnandmore]

All Hands on Deck- Part 2

Pairings: Poly!141 X Wife!Reader.

Warnings: Smut, this whole things is filth, some angst and fluff thrown in.

A/N: I had no intentions of this Poly141 one shot i wrote turning into a series, but i couldnt get their family out of my head so i started writing and now look at us. 9k words into a part 2. Ooopssss. This is also not beta read, all mistakes are mine.

Word Count: 9713

Part 1

“It’s really not that complicated, Johnny,” Simon sighs, resting his head in his hands, his fingers pushing through the unkempt blonde locks.

“Sod Off,” the scotsman huffs as he grabs the three strands of hair on Kira's head again. You watch over the top of your mug. Two of your husbands are sitting on the couch, your oldest twin Kira sitting on the floor between her Da’s legs. One of your middle children, Isla sat between Simons. Johnny had been trying to learn to braid her hair, something you or Simon did most days.

“Left, over middle, right, over middle, and just repeat,” Simon coaches him, showing him once again on Islas long brown hair. 

“Yeah yeah,” Soap grumbles as he tries again, earning a yelp from Kira.

“Ouch! You pulled my hair!” her hands on top of her head as she turns to glare up at her father. 

“Sorry hen, didn't mean ta,” Soap apologizes leaning down to kiss her forehead. Simon finishes the braids in Islas hair, the 6 year old leaning back against his shins. 

“Daddy i’m bored, can i go play with Theo and Joseph now?” She whines, batting her lashes at him. Simon gives her a small nod, and her smile grows. “Thank you Daddy, good luck Da!” she calls as she scrambles to her feet and flees from the room.

“Isla lets play cops and robbers!” Joseph yells as he meets her in the hallway, he peeks into the room giving you and the others a small wave before he bounds off after his sister.

You take a small sip of your caffeinated beverage, the warm liquid warming your stomach as you drink. John had made you a cup and promptly deposited it into your hands as you walked down the stairs this morning,you were still in your sleep clothes. He had murmured about having to go finish some papers in the office on the 3rd floor before he disappeared. 

“Aye! Look at that!” Johnny exclaims as he ties the hair band around the end of the horribly loose and uneven braid going down Kira’s back. Kira’s hands go to the braid, small fingers running over it, she looks over at Simon, a frown on her face. 

“Well you tried,” Simon laughs, before motioning for Kira to sit in front of him. His large hands carefully pulled the hair band from her hair. He runs his fingers through it and quickly re braids it into a neat french braid. 

“You make it look so easy,” Johnny sighs, looking over at you, “both you and Si can work some witchcraft on their hair that I just can't get the hang of.” 

“It’s alright love,” You smile as you walk over, sitting on the couch next to him. Satisfied with her braid Kira slips from the room, off to join her siblings in their games.

“I just want ta help,” Johnny mumbles, his arm slipping around your waist as he pulls you into his side. 

“I know, but hair is not your thing, and that's okay, you help in many other ways,” you press your lips to his cheek, earning a small smile from him. “It took Simon a while to learn too.”

“Really?” Johnny murmurs his lip brushing across your cheek.

“Oh yeah, after we found out about the twins, and that we were having a girl, I think he spent every night until they were born practicing on my hair. Don't let him tell you he’s just good at it, there were lots of terrible braids and my hair being pulled,” you narrow your eyes at Simon and he gives you a small smirk.

Simon had spent almost every night braiding your hair, or well, trying to braid your hair. The first few weeks he mainly just yanked your hair out while you tried to explain the process to him. Once he made such a huge knot in your hair you were afraid you were going to have to cut it out. Kyle had found you sitting on the bathroom counter, sobbing because you couldn't get the snarls out. Thankfully after an hour of you and Kyle working on the knots you were able to get it out. 

Simon had felt terrible about it, and didn't touch your hair for a week after that. It took you begging him to try again for the man to even brush your hair for you. Eventually he got good at the basic braid and you taught him how to do a french braid and a few other hairstyles. 

“Does that mean i can practice on ye?” Johnny's big blue eyes flutter at you, earning a harsh roll of your own.

“Maybe, if you're good.”

Simon stands from the couch, stretching his large body, black tee shirt pulling taught against his chest. “I’m gonna go shower, Lovie, do you need anything?” He looks down at you in Johnny arms, your head resting on his shoulder.

“No, thank you,” you flash him one of your signature smiles, his own lips curling up slightly at the edges. Simon leans down, his large hands cupping your face as he presses a long slow kiss to your lips. Love, adoration and happiness poured into the kiss, he nips your bottom lip gently as he pulls away. Johnny letting out a low groan at the display.

“Steamin’ Jesus..” the Scotsman groans, his head flopping back against the couch as Simon walks away, your cheeks flushed.

“Such a perv Mactavish,” You laugh, and he lifts his head, narrowing those baby blues at you.

“Can’t help it Mo Chridhe, watching you kiss the others does something to me,” he whispers, large calloused hands gripping your waist as he hauls you into his lap. Your knees settle on either side of his muscular thighs. Your hands resting on his shoulders as he blatantly stares at your breasts. “Shame, Hope’s weaning, I fuckin’ love your tits like this.” 

Air rushes from your lungs, your eyes fluttering shut as Johnny nips at the sensitive skin of your breasts. Your forehead rests on top of his head as his lips tease at the tops of your breasts, “Johnny…” you breathe.

“Miss you hen,” Johnny’s breath tickles your skin as he trails kisses up your chest to your neck. His hands knead the flesh of your waist as he pulls you down against his lap, his cock pressing against you through the fabric of his jeans. 

“The kids…” You breathe, your breath coming out in small pants as his lips sucks on the curve of your neck and shoulder. 

“The others can watch em’ they got their turn with you last night,” He mumbles.

He wasn't wrong, last night Kyle and John ravaged your body like it was lost treasure, the pair of them having cornered you in the kitchen after the kids had gone to bed. Simon was trapped in Theo’s room with the toddler sleeping against his chest, Theo had a cold and had been right miserable all day. Needing to be held by you or one of his dads. Johnny was putting Hope to bed, the now 14 month old going through a sleep regression, needing to be rocked to sleep. You werent exactly quiet as John and Kyle fucked you over the kitchen counter. Taking turns slamming into you, your screams and moans floating up the stairs. You know Simon and Johnny heard you, and it only added to your pleasure. 

A startled squeak leaves your lips and Johnny shifts you, tossing you over his shoulder as he stands from the couch. His hand coming down on your ass with a sharp crack. He carried you through the house, you slung over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. You passed the kids in the playroom, Kyle sitting in a chair in the corner, his eyes lifting from his book as you pass. 

“Da? Why is Mama up there? Was she naughty? Is she going to time out?” Isla wonders, coming to stand in the doorway of the playroom. Her big blue eyes gazing up at you, although your view is mostly upside down you still see Kyle's smug smirk from the chair. 

“Aye Bonnie, She needs a time out,” Soap ruffles her hair with the hand that isn't hooked around your knees. “I’m just bringing her to her room, go play with your siblings. Maybe Dad will bring the lot of you downstairs into the basement for a movie in the theater.”

“Can we watch Encanto?!?! Please Dad!!” Isla yells, bounding over to her Dad. Kyle glares at Johnny, as your children swarm him all calling out different movies they want to watch. Even hope babbles happily at his feet. You give a small wave as Johnny carries you up the stairs towards the master bedroom. 

He flops you down in the middle of the giant bed you had custom made for all of you. You bounce slightly on the light green duvet, a laugh floating through the air. Johnny kicks the door closed, his hands finding the hem of his light blue shirt as he drags it off him. His toned stomach and chest are on display. He stalks towards you, like a lion hunting prey, his blue eyes dark with desire. 

Your cheeks flame, heart pounding against your ribs. Johnny cage's you against the bed, strong arms locking your wrists above your head. His lips brush against yours as he slots his knee in between your thighs. 

“Mmm.. want me all to yourself Johnny?” You whisper, looking at his face through half lidded eyes. 

“For now.. Haven't had you all alone for a while. Not that I mind sharing you with the others… I love watching them work you up, making you moan, bring you to the edge with their fingers, tongue and cocks…” His soft pink lips brush against your skin with each word. A shiver shudders through your body at his words. 

He shifts to hold your wrists with one of his hands, his other coming to squeeze at your breast. He kneads the soft flesh there, a moan dragging from your lips. A small smirk playing at the corner of his mouth.

“Steamin’ Jesus, you’re beautiful,” he groans, pressing his face into the side of your neck. Your hips lift to brush against his, earning another small moan your Scottish husband. Johnny kisses up your neck to your mouth, his tongue invading your mouth. Your tongue tangles with his, your breath mingling. Heat sweeps through your body as you grind yourself on Johnny knee between your legs. 

“Need you Johnny…” You whine softly as he slips his hand under your shirt. His cool fingers toying with your nipple. You’ve never been so glad you didn't wear a bra in your life. Your hands are numb from the tight grip he has on your wrists. Body trembling as he kisses you senseless. 

Johnny wasn't always gentle with you in bed, he loved to overstimulate you, pushing you to the edge. He’d love to watch tears roll down your cheeks as you begged him to let you cum. He was probably the worst when it came to edging you, he would go for hours if one of the others didn't step in and save you. He was too impatient for that today, his large hands travel down your body, over the curve of your hips. Fingers slip into the waistband of your sleep short as he harshly tugs them down your legs. 

“So wet for me already, want me to stuff you with my cock? Make you cum all over it?” His voice is raspy as he slides a finger into your slick heat. God those fingers were something else. He always knew exactly where to touch you to make you squirm. 

“Please…” you pant, cheeks flushed, chest heaving.

He curls his fingers inside you before adding 2 more. Your legs tremble as you peek up at him from the mattress. His blue eyes burn into you, white teeth flashing behind his pink lips as he smiles at you. 

“‘M gonna fill you up, put another baby in you just so i can watch your gorgeous tits grow again,” he shifts letting go of your wrists. Your hands tingle and burn as blood rushes back into them. The sound of a belt hitting the floor, the bed dips under his weight as he climbs back over you. His calloused hand grabs the puffy flesh of your thigh, hooking it over his hip.

Johnny moans softly as his hand glides over his thick cock a few times, the tip red and swollen. Precum leaking onto the bed between your thighs. You swore each of your men were hand carved by gods. Your cheeks burn as Johnny looks down at you, your shirt bunched up over your breasts, pupils blown wide.

“Can’t wait anymore Hen, I gotta be inside ya,” Johnny moans, leaning over you once again, his chest brushing yours. The smooth skin of his chest sends tiny jolts of pleasure through you as it drags across your sensitive nipples. You gasp as he slips through your wet folds, a low groan pulled from his lips as he thrusts into you. 

“Fuck, harder,” you moan out, eyes rolling back into your head as he stretches you open. 

You didn't have to tell him twice, he picks up speed, sitting back on his legs as he grips your hips in his large hands. He uses his hands to pull you up his thighs, pounding into you mercilessly. Red hot desire burns in your core, your walls fluttering around his cock. Each thrust brings you closer and closer to your release. He pushes one of your knees to your chest, changing the angle to hit deeper. His right hand leaves your hip so he can use his fingers to circle your swollen clit. 

“You’re like a vice grip on me, dinnae if i can last long Mo Chridhe, you feel too good wrapped around me,” he breathes, his pace brutal.

“Cum for me baby,” You whimper, your own high teetering on the edge. 

His expert fingers circle your clit faster, adding more pressure as he slams his hips into yours. It only takes a few more thrusts before you’re tumbling over the  edge, Johnny groaning his release as falls forward. Shaky arms on either side of your head as his face dips into the curve of your neck.

You both lay there on the bed, Johnny half hard cock still nestled inside you, your chests heaving as you both catch your breath. You trail your hands up his back, fingers sliding into the hair of his mohawk. The damp strands catch on the diamond of your ring.

“You alright?” you laugh slightly, Johnny's entire body weight resting on you. His large form crushing you, but in the best way.

“Think i died and ended up in heaven, must be my guardian angel,” his lips brush against your neck, his stubble tickling you.

“Get off my wife, MacTavish,” Price's voice breaks through your post orgasm haze. The older man stands in the doorway, his back against the white wood door. His arms crossed over his chest, a teasing smile on his lips as he looked over your half naked state and Soaps bare ass.

“Sorry Cap’n, something about this vixen makes me wild,” Soap laughs as he gently pulls out of you, and rolls off you. He flops over on his back, lower stomach glistening with your mess. John rolls his eyes, and leans down plucking a towel from the half full laundry basket by the door and tosses it at Soap. 

“Clean yourself up, Kyle’s stuck in the theater with the kids watching some princess film, and Hope needs a nap.” John walks to the bed, his thighs hitting the edge of the mattress as he wraps a hand around your ankle and yanks you down the bed to him. His light blue eyes trail over your body, his gaze settling on the glistening apex of your thighs. A flare of desire passes over his face before he meets your gaze again. 

“I’ll rescue him, need me some baby cuddles anyways,” Johnny laughs as he pulls on his clothes. He leans over the edge of the bed and presses a chaste kiss to your lips, giving you a wink. “I love you Mo Chridhe,” he smiles, his hand ghosting over your lower stomach as he stands.

You blink a few times, head still fuzzy from your activities with Johnny. The bedroom door closes with a soft click, leaving you alone with John. His rough fingers trail up the smooth skin of your calf to your thigh. Skimming over the curve of your hip and settling on the side of your ribcage. His palm rising and falling with each of your breaths.

“Johnny take care of you Darlin?” He murmurs, thumb brushing over the side of your breast.

“He did, are you here to have your way with me too?” You breathe, teeth sinking into your plush bottom lip as you blink up at him. 

“I wish I could Darling, I want nothing more than to make you scream my name, have my cum dripping out of you. But I have to get to base, Laswell called and said she had something for me to look at, but couldn't discuss it on the phone.” He sighs, his fingers trailing to your hands and he gently pulls you up. 

God he hates the way your brows furrow, a small frown on your beautiful lips. He hates that he has to go, but they’ve been home for almost 5 months now. It was only a matter of time before something like this came up. He wished he could retire, the entire task force. But they were needed. He knew it. The rest of them knew it. You knew it. But it didn't make it any easier, knowing that one day your perfect bubble would pop. That your men would have to rush out the door at some ungodly hour to run headfirst into danger. It seemed to get harder and harder as each kid grew to understand what their dads did. How they might not come back. 

You let out a long breath, and force a smile onto your face. “I understand, can I entice you into a shower with me before you leave?” 

The look on your face was enough to make any man fold, let alone one as hopelessly in love with you as John was. He couldn't resist your big wide eyes blinking up at him, thick long lashes fluttering. He couldn't say no to you, even if he would get his ass chewed out by Laswell for being late.

“Simon better make room,” He chuckles, hands gripping your waist as he hauls you into his arms. Not caring that your bare cunt is leaking cum all over his shirt and jeans. He tosses his boonie hat onto the bed, your legs wrapping around his waist as you press your face into the side of his neck. His beard tickles your skin, as he shoves open the bathroom door. 

Simon glances up in the mirror, a light gray towel slung low on his hips. Board chest and back on full display as he watches his captain carry you into the steam filled bathroom. His brown eyes track you in the mirror until Price sets you down on the cool quartz countertop next to him. 

“Hi Lovie, you look thoroughly fucked, did John do this to you?” Simon muses, his chapped lips brushing your temple.

“No,” you chirp, a blush creeping up your cheeks. “Johnny got his hands on me, John’s going to shower with me. Care to take another?” You muse, earning a small chuckle from the tall blonde next to you.

“Wish i could Lovie, but I promised a very persistent 7 year old I would take her and her twin to the library so they can get a new book,” he roughly towel dries his hair with a smaller towel before he hangs it on a hook. 

Yu jut out your lower lip, “okay, fine,” you pout. 

“Don’t pout, your mouth is far too pretty for that. I’d much rather it be wrapped around my dick tonight,” Simon practically purrs in your ear. His teeth nipping your earlobe in promise. Price returns, and shares a look with Simon in the mirror before he stacks a fresh set of clothes for the both of you on the counter. 

“Be a good girl, I love you,” Simon kisses your lips softly before he leaves the bathroom.

“Love you,” You call after him as steam starts to billow out of the large walk-in shower, hot water cascading from the multiple shower heads. John settles between your thighs and grips the hem of your pajama top, pulling it over your head in one swift motion. Your own hands travel to the buckle of his belt as you quickly unlatch it, yanking it from the waist of his jeans and letting it tumble to the floor with a metallic clink.

Your deft fingers quickly undo the button and fly, one hand slipping into the opening to palm his half hard cock through his boxers. Your tongue darts out as you notice the wet spot on the front of his jeans from your and Johnny's mixed releases.  John inhales sharply, large hands wrapping around your wrist.

“Darling,” he warns, his voice low and tight.

“What?” You blink up at him, feigning innocence.

“We have to shower now if you want me to join you, can’t keep Laswell waiting all day..” He warns, but you don't stop. His cock growing under your tender touches. 

“We can shower…”  You purr, leaning forward your lips gently grazing the top of his boxers. John's abs contract as your breath tickles his happy trail, the smattering of dark hair that disappears under his boxers. Your tongue pokes out, licking a small wet line over his boxers, his now hard cock jumping as your warm tongue flicks over the tip through the fabric. 

The growl that leaves John's lips is almost feral as he grabs your hips and yanks you off the bathroom counter. He spins you, your hip bones hitting the edge of the counter, a delicious sting as they bite into the corner. John's gaze meets your in the mirror, his jaw set in a hard line, one hand pressing into the space between your shoulder blades. He forces you to bend over the counter, his gaze never leaving yours. 

“You spoiled brat, you want to be fucked is that it?” He grabs a fistful of your hair and yanks your head back. “Want me to fuck you into the bathroom counter like the slut you are?” He tugs sharply on your hair, a gasp forcing itself from you.

“Yes, god, yes,” You moan, nipples hardening as they slide against the cold counter.

“I won't be gentle with you, I have things to do, I'm a busy man,” he warns, but it does nothing but excite you. It wasn't often you pushed John, you usually understood when he said he had things to do. But a part of you craved it when he was rough with you. John was most always gentle with you. As if he was afraid to break you, treating you like something to be savored. It was Simon who you often turned to when you needed someone to throw you around, leaving bruises on your skin. But there was a side to Price only you could draw out, when you knew he was stuck in his head of the things he needed to do. Lost in the responsibility of being Captain to the others, the one who inevitably makes the call for them to leave your home and storm into a warzone.

It didn't take much sometimes, just a little bratty behavior when you knew he was in a hurry. If you had been a good girl like Simon suggested you would have climbed into the shower without protest. Let John wash you tenderly under the stream of the shower and kiss you goodbye as you blow dried your hair. But instead you had pressed him, edging the line of his control by palming him through his boxers. The kitten lick through the thin fabric was the final straw for him. 

Now as he pulled his shirt off, and shoved his jeans and boxers down to the floor you can't help but pant. You never take your eyes off him as he glares at you through the fogging mirror. One hand gripped in your hair, the other wrapped around his throbbing cock. 

“This what you wanted? Getting me all worked up when you know I have to leave?” He asks, giving himself a few harsh strokes. Your eyes trail over his hand, your brain short circuiting as you watch him jerk his cock.

A sharp sting across your ass makes you yelp, johns palm cracking across the silky smooth flesh. “Asked you a question, I expect an answer,” he grinds out.

Y-yes sir,” your words tumble from your dry lips, tongue feeling stuck as he lines himself up with your still wet pussy. He nudges your entrance, and your eyes flutter shut. The tip of his cock slipping between your wet folds.

“Eyes on me,” he demands, and your eyes fly open at the exact moment he slams his hips home. A loud moan falling from your lips as he pounds into you. His hand is still gripping your hair. Your hip bones bite into the rounded edge of the sink. The sound of your skin slapping together fills the bathroom along with the water in the shower. The mirror starts to fog with your breath and the steam from the hot water. The mix of John’s cock driving into you and the humid air of the bathroom makes you dizzy. Your fingers dig into the smooth sink, grasping for purchase. John's cheeks flush as he continues his harsh assault on your body. 

“You take my cock so well, such a good little cum slut,” He rasps. Your eyes roll back into your head as he releases your hair. His hands wrap around the curve of your hips so he can thrust into you harder. You were definitely going to be bruised later. But you didn't care, the sight of John losing himself in you was everything to you. 

His fingers dig into your hip bones, short nails leaving small crescent shapes on the delicate flesh. “You like it don't you? Huh? Like the feel of my cock filling you up, want my cum to drip from your tight cunt like Johnnys, huh Darling? Want us to fuck another baby into you?’ his hand comes down on your already red ass cheek, a biting sting, he doesn't bother to soothe the red skin. His smile grows as his hand print leaves a raised welt, if there was one thing in common between all of your husbands was they loved marking you. 

Whether it was Kyle leaving tiny love bites across your stomach and thighs. Simon's finger prints bruised into your waist. John's handprints on your ass. Or Johnny's teeth marks across the plains of your breasts. They all had their subtle or well not so subtle ways of letting the others know they were there.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum already, you’re so fuckin’ tight,” John pants, his thrusts becoming erratic as he gets closer to the edge. “Touch yourself, make yourself cum all over my cock like the good little slut you are.” 

Your eyes watch his face in the mirror as you slide a hand between your thighs and rub fast, tight circles on your clit. Your fingers gliding effortlessly over the swollen nub, the mix of you and Johnny making the perfect lubricant. It only takes you moments to work yourself to the edge, your body practically humming already. 

John shifts his hips slightly, hitting that spot inside you that drives you crazy. You both fall over the edge with a shout. John's hips slamming into yours with one last rough thrust as he stills inside you. His cock twitching, your walls milking him. You collapse forward, gasping breaths wracking your body. 

John reaches forward, brushing the hair from your cheek. His fingers tuck the loose strands behind your ear. “Didn't hurt you, right?”

Your other cheek is pressed firmly against the smooth bathroom counter, the overhead lighting reflecting off the mica embedded in the white quartz. You give a small shake of your head. “No, I knew what I was getting myself into,” You push yourself up on shaky arms as John  slips from between your legs. The mixture of his and Johnny's cum dripping down your thighs. 

A harsh knock on the bathroom door breaks the moment.

“Price? Laswell called again, said she couldn't get ahold of you, asked me to tell you she needs you on base Asap,” Kyle's voice drifts through the bathroom door and you groan, turning to face John.

“Rain check on the shower, Darling?” Price’s fingers grab your chin softly.

“Rain check,” You agree leaning up on your toes to press a kiss to his mouth. He pulls away all too soon for your liking, wiping himself off with a towel before pulling on his clothes. Pulling open the shower door you step into the hot stream, your body shaky and numb from the mind blowing orgasms. You tip your head back allowing the hot water to wet your hair, your eyes closed. 

A soft hand slips around your waist, your eyes popping open to see Kyle. His short black hair is dotted with water that bounces off you. A smile forms on your lips as he gently pulls you toward him. The hard expanse of his chest is a welcome home for your head. He doesn't say anything for a few minutes, just holds you under the hot stream. His fingers absentmindedly stroking your soft skin. 

“It sounds to me like you had a very eventful morning,” Kyle teases, his lips brushing your forehead. 

“Oh? What makes you say that?”

“You know how Johnny is after he gets his way with you, he's like a kid in a candy store. He’s put Hope down for her nap and then proceeded to offer to bake cookies with Isla and Theo. Knowing full well he was going to have to clean the kitchen after that fiasco.” Kyle laughs, “and you weren't exactly quiet with John a moment ago.” 

Your cheeks grow hot, even after all this time you still couldn't help but feel shy when the other men knew what happened without them. It's not that you were ashamed, it was more to do with your upbringing. Your parents were strict, sex was a taboo subject, you didn't even know the basics until they taught you in health class. Your parents weren't a huge part of your life, they chose to put distance between you and your family when they found out you were dating 4 men.

They showed face at your wedding though, playing the doting parents of the bride. But the cold shoulder your mother gave you when you told her you were expecting her first grandchildren told you everything you needed to know. They weren’t okay with how you chose to live your life, they just cared more about their image.

“Where did you just go?” Kyle asks, his fingers under your chin tipping your face up to his.

“Hmm?” you hum, brows furrowed. 

“You got stuck in your head, where did you go?” His own brows furrow as he studies you. His long fingers brushing a drop of water from your cheek.

“I was just thinking about my parents…” you shrug halfheartedly. You tried not to let them bother you, telling yourself that you were better off without them. That your kids didn't need that in their life, they had 2 sets of wonderful grandparents who loved them more than anything. Johnny and Kyle's parents would find a way to give the kids all the stars in the sky if they could. 

“Baby,” Kyle breathes, his face coming closer to yours. “You don't need them, don't get lost in their ignorance.”

“I know.. Just.. I don't know,” You mumble, biting the inside of your cheek hard, the coppery tang of blood distracting you.

“Let me make it better,” he whispers, lips skimming yours. Kyle's kisses were always soft and sweet, just like him. His lips are as smooth as butter, as soft as cotton candy. He always took his time with you. Each movement is carefully thought out to bring you the most pleasure. His hands tangle in your wet hair, but unlike John there's no sharp sting. Just tender touches along your scalp as he slips his tongue into your mouth. 

The low moan that vibrates through your chest is enough to encourage him to continue. Kyle's fingers trail down your neck and spine to the curve of your ass. His fingers knead the soft flesh there, soothing the raised handprints left by Price. His fingers grip your thigh softly as he hikes it up over his hip, allowing his hard cock to brush against you.

“Kyle… please,” You whisper, rolling your hips into him.

“I’ve got you, Baby,” he whispers against your mouth. He turns you slowly, your back hitting the cool tile wall of the shower. He captures your swollen lips in another searing kiss, as one arm lips behind your back, causing you to arch into him. His other hand wraps around his thick cock as he slides into you. You moan into his mouth, your kiss becoming more clashing teeth and harsh breathing than before. Your hand grip his muscular shoulders, your nails biting into the smooth brown skin. You can feel his muscles flex and contract under your fingers as he languidly slides in and out of you. 

“You’re so good to us,” he whispers against your skin, ‘always taking care of us, take such good care of our babies when we're away. You’re ethereal, a true goddess on earth just for us.” 

Kyle's praise brings tears to your eyes, what did you possibly do to deserve him? Or any of them? Kyle drags his hips along yours, and your legs begin to shake. Your body was spent, between Soap and Price, you weren't sure if you had any more in you. But it doesn't stop Gaz, he just picks up his pace slightly. Nothing compared to either of the men before him, but enough that the coil in your stomach is now twisting tighter, and it’ll only be a matter of moments before you shatter in his arms. 

Gaz’z lips trail down your jaw and neck as he sucks along the smooth skin there. Quiet pants being coaxed out of you with each one. His lips seal around your nipple, sending a jolt of electricity skittering across your skin. 

“Fuck, Ky- I cant,” you whine, the burning in your core too much, as he drags his cock out of you before pushing back in at an agonizingly slow pace. His teeth graze your nipple as he pulls away. His mouth peppering your chest with wet open mouth kisses. His saliva mixes with the warm water leaving your chest shiny under the bathroom lights. 

“Yes you can Baby, I know you can. Just one more, for me,” he coaxes, his hand slipping between you, to rub your overly sensitive clit. His fingers tapping with the lightest of touches, and you break. Your walls are clamping down on him. Tears roll down your cheeks as you come with his name on your lips. 

His hips stutter as he follows you over the cliff, his own orgasm ripping through him as he lets your leg fall. Both your feet now firmly on the ground as he presses his forehead to yours. You both pants, the air between you becoming stifling with the humidity from the shower. You wrap your arms around his chest, allowing your head to lay over his rapidly beating heart. Your hair clinging to his skin as he adjusts the shower head above you, allowing more hot water to pour over the both of you. 

You stay like that until you're both able to breathe normally, and Kyle begins to gently wash you. He brushes the plush washcloth that's lathered in vanilla scented body wash over your body. He kneels in front of you, gliding the cloth up your legs to your thighs and ass. He's gentle where prices hands have left a mark. 

He presses small kisses to the bruises that are forming on your hips from the countertop. Before he stands, pouring some strawberry scented shampoo into his hands and working a rich lather into your hair.You both enjoy the quiet, neither one talking much except for when giving instructions to rinse off. 

After you return the favor of washing Gaz, he gets out of the shower, pulling two towels from the warming rack and wrapping one around his waist. The other he secures around yours. He spends the next 30 minutes lathering you with lotions and blow drying your hair. He glances at you through the bathroom mirror as he pushes up the sleeves of his shirt. His white teeth flashing at you as he smiles.

“You alright baby?” 

You nod, pulling on one of Simon's oversized black hoodies. It falls to the tops of your thighs, and you have to roll the cuffs of the sleeves up so you can use your hands. Kyle presses a kiss to your cheek, his warm lips lingering on your cheek for a moment.

“You look tired. Why don't you lay down for a nap?” he suggests, his fingers twirling a piece of your hair. 

You could use a nap, but you have things to do. Anxiety gnaws at you, you know that they’ll be leaving soon. It's not hard to interpret the messages behind Kate wanting to see John on base. That's how it normally went, she would ask him to come to base to discuss something. John would disappear for a few hours, sometimes late into the night before he came home.  He would talk to the others first, usually Simon, then Kyle or Johnny whoever he could find first. Then he would seek you out. He’d pull you into him, his beard tickling your cheeks as he peppered your face with kisses. 

Then he’d lay it on you, tell you that they were shipping out, either in the morning or in the next few days. You always tried to be strong, to put on a brave face especially if the children were still awake. Then you would watch as he told each of the children what was going on. Kira and Joseph would hold their younger siblings as they cried, begging their fathers not to go. Your heart shattering in your chest as you watch the four men in your life try to reassure them that they would be back. Eventually the younger kids would settle, the twins distracting them with games or snacks. 

It wasn't until they had left, and the kids were all in bed that you allowed yourself to fall apart. Huddled alone in your giant bed, surrounded by their pillows that you would let the tears fall. Sometimes one of the kids would climb into bed with you, their own attempts at comforting themselves. The time where your husbands were gone felt like wading through chest high mud. Each action needs twice the amount of effort than normal. You didn't have enough hands it seemed, there was always someone needing something. Someone had practice or a project they needed done. A baby was sick or going through a milestone. A faucet would leak or you’d forget entire meals when grocery shopping. You chew your bottom lip, spinning your engagement ring and wedding band around your ring finger. 

“No i'm okay, I’m gonna go see if Johnny needs any help with Theo and Isla,” you smile softly pressing a quick kiss to Kyle’s cheek before slipping out of the bathroom.

You can hear Johnny talking with Isla and Theo, his accented voice easy to pick out. You pad down the hallway to the kitchen. From the large archway you see Johnny standing behind Isla and Theo who stand on little helper stools. Theos light brown skin is dusted with flour, and his brown curls are pushed out of his face with a pair of bright purple bunny ears. Isla peers over the bowl, her finger dipping into the dough. A glob of cookie dough makes it way into her mouth, a sly smirk on her lips as she thinks Johnny didn’t see her.

But the demolition expert did see it, you can tell by the way his mouth slants upwards, the slight shake of his head. Theo reaches into the bowl, his little fist gripping the chocolate chip cookie dough like it was a life line. But instead of shoving it into his mouth he uses his other hand, attempting to roll the dough into a ball. It squishes through his fingers and lands with a wet plop on the counter. His big brown eyes look up in panic as the sticky dough clings to his hands. 

“Oi lad made a fine mess of yerself don’t ya?” Johnny laughs, scraping the excess dough from Theos outstretched hands. 

“Da, do you think mama will like the cookies?” Isla wonders, using a dough scoop to scoop out portions of cookie dough, she plops them on a baking sheet. A little too close together but Johnny just moves the small mounds over a bit.

“I think she’ll love em, your mama loves everything you make for her,” he ruffled her hair with his clean hands. Coming to stand behind Theo as he helps him scoop out his own dough with another scoop.

“Sometimes when all of you leave, I can hear Mama crying… Papa left to go see aunt Kate.. that means you’ll leave again soon…” Isla looks down at the cookie sheet, her bottom lip between her teeth. You can see her shoulders rise as she takes a deep breath.

“It’s okay to be sad when we leave, lala girl. Sometimes Mama’s get sad too,” he crouches down next to her, his finger hooking up her chin as he looks at her.

“Why do you leave if it makes Mama and us sad?” She leans into his hand, her smaller hands coming to rest on his cheeks. Theo jams the cookie scoop into the bowl too young to understand the conversation.

“Well, papa, Daddy, Dad and I have really important jobs. And those jobs sometimes make it so we have to go far away to capture bad people, and stop them from hurtin others. Like how Batman stops the joker, and police officers catch bad guys.”

“Olice Officer! Wee woo wee woo!” Theo yells, the scoop clattering to the counter, as he claps.

“That’s right, “ Johnny laughs, “but we’ll always come back to you, you guys and your Mama are the most important things in the world to us. So we try our hardest to always come back. Can you do me a favor tho Lala girl?” He asks, and Isla nods eagerly.

“The next time you hear your Mama cryin’ I want you to give her the biggest hug ever okay? And don’t be afraid to tell her it’s okay to be sad too. I think sometimes Mama forgets she can be sad, because she’s so busy trying to make sure none of you bairns are sad.” Johnny gives her a soft smile.

“I can do that Da, can we finish the cookies now?” She grabs the scoop again and looks at Theo and Soap.

“Of course,” he smiles again and you duck out of the archway, just out of sight. Your eyes burn, but you blink back the tears and take a moment to compose yourself. You didn’t realize that Isla had heard you crying. You tried desperately to be quiet, but Islas' room was across the hall and she must've heard you while she went to the bathroom. 

You take another deep breath and step out into the kitchen with a smile on your face as you walk to the large kitchen island.

“Mama! Mama!” Theo yells, “We are making you cookies!” 

“Cookies? For me? Thank you baby,” You lean down pressing a kiss to his messy curls, the purple bunny ears poking you in the face. You look over the 4 large cookie sheets that are dotted with cookie dough.

“Wow it looks like you guys made enough for everyone, huh?” You smile at Isla and she nods. 

“Yeah! Da said we had to triple the recipe because there are soooo many of us,” She explains, scooping another ball of dough from the large metal bowl. 

“That's true, there are a lot of people in our house. Do you know how many?” You slip into a bar stool, your eyes catching Soaps above Theos head. He gives you a panty dropping smile and a wink.

“Uh,” Isla thinks hard for a moment, her bottom lip pulled between her teeth. “Theres Me, Theo, Kira, Joseph and Hope, that's 5… Mama, Papa, Dad, Daddy and Da. That's 5 too… and 5 plus 5 makes 10!” She beams. “There's 10 people who live in our house. Right Da?”  She looks over her shoulder.

“That's right Lass, 10 people so far,” he raises his eyebrows suggestively at you.

“So far? What does that mean? Why are Mama’s cheeks so red?” She scrunched her brows looking between you and Johnny.

“Nothing baby, Da is just being silly,” you roll your eyes. Isla shrugs and goes back to her job. Between her and Theo it doesn't take long for the cookie dough to be laid out on every cookie sheet you own. You help Johnny by putting them in the large commercial size stove, even with your giant oven you can only fit 4 cookie sheets at a time. After Johnny cleans up Theo and Isla he starts to work on the dishes, you perch yourself on a bar stool and watch as he methodically washes each dish. 

The sounds of Theo and Isla playing floats through the house as they play in the large playroom at the front of the house. Kyle comes into the kitchen and places his hands on your hips, dropping a kiss to the top of your head. 

“The cookies smell good, good to know Johnny didn't mess them up,” he teases. Johnny looks over his shoulder narrowing his eyes at Gaz.

“Oi, it was one time, and it wasn't even my fault!” He huffs.

“No you’re right you just decided to let the twins measure everything out and they put half a cup of salt instead of a teaspoon,” Kyle laughs.

“Shall we talk about your lasagna, then?” You look up at Kyle and his smile drops.

“You said you wouldn't bring that up,” he grumbles, his hands squeezing your waist softly.

“Did i?” You feign innocence, batting your lashes at him.

“Cheeky woman,” Kyle mutters, peppering your face with feather light kisses.

“Keep that up and I might have to steal you for round 2..” Soap's voice is rough and low as he looks at you and Kyle.

Your cheeks blush for what feels like the millionth time today, and you shake your head. “You’re insatiable,” you roll your eyes, slipping from the stool and walking towards the door. “Don't let the cookies burn!” You call over your shoulder.

“Ah Steamin’ Jesus!” Johnny curses.

You walk down the hall, peeking your head into the playroom, to see Isla and Theo sitting in a large bean bag chair, Theo peering over the edge of the learning tablet Isla is playing with. A smile plays at the corner of your lips as you walk towards the staircase. You slowly climb the stairs, pausing briefly at Hope's bedroom door to look in. The 14 month old lays on her stomach, her bum up in the air, stuffed bunny tucked in her arms as she sleeps. You quietly close the door and climb the second staircase up to the 3rd floor of your house. There were 3 rooms up here, a small half bath, John’s office, and a guest room used only when Kyle or Johnny's parents came to visit. 

You pull open the french doors to John’s office, stepping into the warm room. The hunter green walls lined with heavy oak bookshelves, his large desk sat in the middle of the room facing the floor to ceiling window. An old leather couch sits along one wall and you sink into the soft brown leather. Your fingers brushing across the cracked and worn material. You pull the fluffy green blanket off the back and wrap it around yourself. Your knees pulled up to your chest, your chin resting on top of them as you stare at the landscape outside the window.

Your fingers picking at the loose threads on the blankets. You came up here to get some alone time. No one usually ventures into John's office when he isn't home. Your mind drifts as you watch the fluffy white clouds roll by. Your eyes grow heavy as you enjoy the quiet.

You must've dozed off, your body jolting awake when a hand touches your shoulder. Your head whips up, eyes meeting a pair of dark brown ones.

Simon. Those eyes belonged to Simon.

The tension leaves your shoulders as he crouches next to the couch, his broad shoulders block the light from the window. His blonde eyebrows furrowed as he looks at you. Those dark eyes studying every part of your face. 

“Hi,” you whisper, voice still thick with sleep.

“Hi Lovie, you alright?” He asks, his large hand taking your much smaller ones.

“I’m okay, tired,” you shrug, your fingers wiggling against his palm. “How was the library?”

“Good, Kira and Joseph got 2 books each, and they brought home a few for the younger kids. They’re all in the kitchen eating cookies with Kyle and Johnny. Are you sure you’re okay?” He squeezes your hands again. 

You sigh, Simon had a way of seeing right through you. Your other husbands did too, but they often erred on the side of caution when it came to confronting you about it. At some point or another they had pushed just a little too hard when you were having a bad day and you snapped. Basically chewing their heads off before you burst into tears. The other 3 had panicked, not sure what to do, their efforts to comfort you had ended with you hitting their chest as you told them to go away. Cursing at them for pushing you on things you weren't ready to talk about. They had quickly learnt that you would come to them when you were ready. But Simon on the other hand didn't care. He welcomed your outburst, taking each emotion with stride. He’d let you beat on his chest until your arms hurt. Until your anger gave way to your true emotions. 

“No.. im not okay,” you relent. Simon just looks at you, waiting for you to explain.

“I know you're going to be leaving soon, and I know at this point I should be used to it. It's been 8 years of deployments. But it doesn't get any easier.. And now the kids are starting to get to the age where they ask questions, wanting to know what you guys do while you're gone. They're starting to understand that what you're doing is dangerous. I don't know how I'm supposed to explain to them what happens if one of you doesn't come home…” you trail off, feeling a weight settle on your chest.

“I can't promise we’ll come home, I won't lie to you and tell you that we will. I’ve never sugar coated that. But you’re stronger than you think Lovie, I know that you can handle everything here. You’re an amazing Mum to our kids. You’re so kind to them, so patient. I know it's hard when we're away. But I promise we won't be doing as many missions as before. Price has had a few meetings with Kate about us stepping back, training a new team to take our place. We don't want to lose any more time with you and the kids. Besides, I've heard through the grapevine that we have a more important mission here.” He brushes a strand of your hair behind your ear.

“Oh? What's that?” You ask, raising an eyebrow.

“Something about knocking you up again,” he smiles like a cat who got the canary. He shifts forward on his knees. Large hands pawing at your sides as he drags you down the couch. His hand flicking open the button of your jeans. Your chest heaves as he leans forward pressing a soft kiss to the skin below your navel. Goosebumps erupt on your skin Simon flicks his tongue out, wetting your skin.

“Simon…” You breathe, your hands tangling in his soft blonde hair. 

“I know Love,” he murmurs against your skin, his fingers dipping into the waistband of your jeans and panties, tugging them down in one swift motion. You reach for his own waistband, undoing his belt in one swift motion. His brown eyes burn into you as he slides his hand up the inside of your thighs and drags them through the wetness that pools between them.

“Such a good girl for me, always so ready for me,” Simon praises, his eyes straying to the bruise marks on your hips from when John fucked you into the bathroom counter. “Looks like someone already played rough with you today. How did that to you Love? Those weren't there when i left you in the bathroom this morning, tell me was it Kyle or John who bruised that pretty skin of yours.” He slips a finger into you, and you groan, your inner walls fluttering around his thick digits.

“John..” you moan as he curls his fingers into you hitting that spot that makes you see stars.

“Did Kyle fuck you too?” He asks, his other hand palming his hard cock through his boxers. 

“Mmmm, yes..” you pant, your hands wrapping around his wrist as he fucks you with his fingers. 

“Must be my turn then, huh,” he kisses you softly, his lips slanting over yours for a moment, stealing your breath away. “Want me to fill you up? Stuff you full of my cum like the others? Fuck a baby into you?” 

“Ahh- yes, Si.. Please,” you gasp and pant. Back arching off the couch as you press your hips into his hand. Grinding your clit against the heel of his palm.

“Fuckin’ hell, such a good girl,” Simon groans as he pulls his hand from your dripping pussy. Shoving his jeans down his thick thighs, he grabs your ankles spinning you on the couch so your back presses into the cushions. Your thighs spread, ass hanging off the seat. He leans up on his knees, his cock nudging your tight entrance. One hand grips the flesh of your thigh as he holds you from falling off the couch. The other wraps around the column of your throat. He gives it a gentle squeeze, not enough to cut off oxygen just enough to restrict it as he bullies his cock into you. 

Your vision blurs as he thrusts into you, his pace steady and even as he fucks you into the couch. Loud moans tear from your throat as he pounds into you. Your body trembles as his cock rubs against your walls. 

“Cum for me beautiful,” He grunts, applying more pressure to your throat. Tiny black pin pricks dance in your vision as he picks up his pace. Your legs trembling, Simon's brown eyes stare into you, his hips faltering as he gets closer to the edge. You moan loudly, air flooding your lungs as he releases your throat, and rubs tight fast circles on your clit. Your body tingles from head to toe as your orgasm rips through you. 

“Fuck!” Simon shouts as he stills inside you, his release painting your walls with thick white ropes of cum. He leans down pressing his forehead to yours as he breathes heavily. You stay like that for a moment, catching your breath as your legs stop trembling. 

“I love you,” you whisper, pressing your lips to his once more.

“I love you too,” he whispers back.

You and Simon change into your clothes, and he settles you in his lap, big arms wrapped around your waist as you snuggle into him. Your quiet moment doesn't last long, the tell tale sound of boots on the stairs causes both of you to look over at the glass doors. John stands just outside of them, Hope resting on his hip, a small smile on his face as he takes in the sight of you and Simon on the couch. Hope babbles happily in his arms, her chubby fingers grabbing at the brim of his Boonie hat. He pulls open the doors and steps into the room. Hope clapping her hands as she sees you. 

“Mamamamama” She babbles, reaching out to you, and you open your arms for her. John carefully puts her in your lap and brushes his fingers along your cheek. You glance up your eyes meeting his own, and that's when you see it, the hard lines around his eyes, the rigid set of his jaw as he watches you. 

“When do you leave?” You ask softly, focusing your attention on the baby in your arms as she yanks on your shirt.

“Later tonight, after the kids are in bed,” he sighs, “I'm sorry Darling, I tried to get out of it. But Laswell needs us.” 

Simon presses his face into your shoulder. There goes your bubble. Popped.

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