#it just feels very nice to have a writer friend who cares about what i do and who i can share stuff with and throw ideas around and whatnot

[the-kipsabian]

if something tho, i have gotten better about writing just to share with one person and just enjoying creating that way so. thats very nice

#especially since ngl seeing how badly my clicks have tanked on both sites kinda unmotivates me a lot so. being able to do this helps #like said i wrote almost 20k words last month but only got 12k posted on ao3. even less here #sooooo liiiiike. idk what this means going forward #it just feels very nice to have a writer friend who cares about what i do and who i can share stuff with and throw ideas around and whatnot #it just feels nice. i havent had that in a long time and its honestly motivating me a lot more than thinking about posting shit anywhere atm #i get to share and i get shared with and yeah. just posting in private feels so much nicer #it has little to do with the stuff i write too tbh so. yeah #idk where this post was going im eepy #the point is i wrote 2.3k words tonight and they are enjoyed where they should and it makes me happier than posting them so ✌️ #if you dont get fics much from me anymore you know what happened lol #night is an absolute mess on main

[cannibalbuffe]

hi! I've honestly been craving some qpr headcanons with Alastor as someone who's also aroace! The concept piques my curiosity so much considering most of the stuff with him is purely romantic (no offense to those writers, I just wanna see more qpr stuff! :])

Of course! But do forgive me, annon, I got so carried away with this 😅. I just really like Alastor a lot.

I ended up writing some backstory to your relationship first, but I highlighted the start of the proper qpr headcanons if you feel like skipping that.

Obligatory I'm sorry if this is ooc, I'm still getting used to writing about these characters. This is also all based on my own perception of him.

(Also, I am aware that qprs are very different from one another and there is no single mold for a qpr, I'm just going off of what I think it would be like with Alastor.)

Uhh, I also finished this at 1 AM, so forgive any mistakes. And I'm pretty sure I changed the verb conjugations(? Is this how you say that in English?) from present to past at some point. Sorry. Enough with the A/Ns now. Hope you enjoy!

Alastor queerplatonic relationship headcanons

(gender neutral reader, Alastor x reader)

‼️Trigger-warning‼️: mentions of cannibalism (not graphic), a single mention of tongue-kissing and making out (spoiler: he doesn't want either of those things in this work.) Usage of the word queer, but not as a slur. Alastor is a grandpa and you have to explain LGBTQ+ stuff to him, but he gets it.

› At first, before you were close, it's likely that he didn't see you as an equal.

› Truly, in his eyes, it seems not really is his equal. He is the most powerful overlord in hell and he knows it.

› Unless you are someone he holds in high regard (and this is mostly based on vibes, barely anything to do with power, as we can see by how he is with Lucifer of all people) before your first meeting, like Zestial, you won't be on equal footing at first.

› You only really start getting close when his perception of you shifts.

› You respect his boundaries, you are interesting, you and him share quite a few interests (or not really, but you're at least interested in hearing about his), and you're, surprisingly, pretty wise and mature.

› And caring. I personally believe he would be drawn to that in a way that he may not even understand fully- or realize it at all.

› Still, the point is. He respects you, and you respect him.

› (And not in the way some others do, where they're only "respectful" out of fear. You would act like this regardless of his power.)

› This, by the way, is important. You don't treat him like a superior, but as an equal.

› You'd think someone like him would love to be treated like a superior, and it's true. He very much does.

› But he has to admit to himself that it does feel nice whenever someone isn't shaking in their boots and can hold really good conversations with him while still not being pushy, annoying or just generally disrespectful.

› Anyways.

› Ever since you became friends (which took long), one could say, you just kept becoming closer and closer.

› You were the first one to be vulnerable with him, of course. It happened on accident, but you trusted him enough for that.

› You were also the first one to share any more intimate information with him. Something you wouldn't tell just anyone.

› Between this, your conversations, and maybe even helping each other around (honestly, he probably helps you more than you do him, but you always offer it and always in a sweet way, never condescending, and he appreciates that.)

› He eventually felt more comfortable sharing personal things with you too.

› (He may have distanced himself a bit when he realized this, but it was short-lived. You can't be without each other for so long, and you were pretty upset at his suddenly withdrawal. You may not have mentioned it to him, but he could tell, and as much as he hated to admit it, it hurt him to see you sad because of him.)

› This marks the beginning of the path toward your queerplatonic relationship.

› I mean, you didn't initially label it as such, but it definitely started there.

› Surprisingly, I feel like the first one to ever do any sort of affectionate gesture towards the other was him.

› You knew he didn't like to be touched, so you didn't.

› But! He just started getting more and more comfortable with touching you. At first it was hands on your shoulders, or putting his arm over them.

› I can even see a head pat or two, which he probably passed off as some sort of joke the first few times, but, if you liked them so much, just became a thing he does to you.

› And then one day you, completely absent-mindedly, intertwined your arm with his while walking around.

› When you noticed you had done it and he hadn't said anything, you questioned him about it.

› "Alastor, I'm sorry I didn't ask... is this alright?"

› "This?... Oh, you mean the arms? Ah, dear, don't worry, if it weren't I would have simply told you so!"

› From them on you only got more and more physically affectionate with each other. At first you would usually be the one to start it, but eventually you were both shockingly equal in doing so.

› (You still would always ask if you could touch him beforehand, but after a while he just gave you a free-pass.)

› Not a lot in public, though. Mostly just hand holding, or intertwining arms (if in public, that is.)

› Alastor also was so protective of you. You were the person he treasured most, after all.

› Well, demon.

› Even if you told him you were going to be okay, he would watch out nonetheless. He couldn't afford to lose you, not when he's never trusted and cared for a person this much.

› You two also cuddle a lot. You were the first one to ask, as usual, but now both of you feel weird sleeping alone.

› Alastor loves being the big spoon, if you're doing that.

› But he is also quite fond of occasionally being the little spoon, although he wouldn't be caught dead admitting it.

› A hobby you two do together is cooking. Cooking with Alastor is fun... especially if you're okay with cannibalism.

› But if you don't like that, he won't insist, of course.

› He's pretty good at cooking, though! If you're also good at it, then great. If not, he'll tease you about it (in a friendly way), but still teach you.

› On teasing, he teases you quite a bit, but never in a mean way. If you don't mind, of course.

› You also may tease him occasionally, but he doesn't appreciate you teasing him in public.

› The two of you also have a good amount of inside jokes that probably confuse the hell out of the others.

› Kissing... well. I don't really see Alastor as the type who would enjoy kissing on the lips too much.

› Tongue is out of question for him, as well as any sort of making out, but otherwise... if you like it, he can do that for you.

› He might actually like a peck or two. An acquired taste for him. Don't overdo it, though.

› Of course, him being from the 1930s and not very familiar with anything LGBTQ+ related, he would, at first, be somewhat confused by the request.

› You would probably have to explain to him that nothing is inherently romantic, especially not if you don't want it to be.

› "A kiss on the lips? Well... we aren't courting, Y/n."

› "We can put our own meanings to things, though. Would you like this kiss to be romantic?"

› "Definitely not!"

› "Well, me neither. So it's not!"

› "... That is very sound logic! I can't believe I've never thought of this myself."

› Kisses on the rest of the face are something else, though. He does enjoy it whenever you kiss him on the cheek. He himself might occasionally kiss you on the forehead.

› But overall I don't think he's big on kissing.

› If you want to really solidify that you're in a queerplatonic relationship you'd also have to explain what that means to him, sorry.

› Again, he's old and not up to date with things.

› Thankfully he understands things easily.

› "I see... I suppose we do have quite the queer relationship, don't we? And it is certainly platonic. I don't see why not!"

› Going back to vulnerability. It will never feel fully natural for him to just be vulnerable with you — or anyone else, for the matter.

› (In case you couldn't tell, he's using the word queer as meaning odd (and doing a little pun. You know. Because it's a. Queerplatonic relationship. Queer. Hehehehe), as it defies the norm of what a platonic relationship usually looks like, despite being one.)

› But you know him well enough at this point to recognize whenever there's something going on with him.

› And if you show concern and give him enough time he will share whatever it is with you.

› If it's not anything too big he might even reach out to you first.

› He can also read you like a book and gives surprisingly good advice, and is also pretty good at comforting you.

› You are the only person allowed at his studio while he's live on the radio. You usually read as he speaks in the background, his voice is very relaxing. He enjoys having you around.

› He's also particularly gentlemanly to you, more than to the others. When you're with him you never have to open a single door yourself, for one. If it's raining, he'll hold the umbrella for the two of you. When walking together on the sidewalk, he's always on the side closest to the street instead of you.

› You two often go out for dinner. If you also fancy some cannibalism, he will definitely show you his favorite restaurants around. If not he will just pick the best non-cannibal places (but you know those are not his favorites, haha.)

› He just cares about you a lot, even if it took him long to admit (it may have seemed fast-paced during this, but Alastor is someone who really takes long to get close to.)

› And you care about him lot too!

› (And you're probably never going to be in a life-threatening situation again, at least not at the hands of most demons. Who would ever want trouble with Alastor?)

#alastor x reader #platonic alastor x reader #queerplatonic alastor x reader #hazbin hotel x reader #headcanons #buffet tag

[justatypicalwizard]

A scrap from your book

Bakugo x reader, aged up, college! au, quirks don't matter, no warnings, just heartwarming

Roommate Bakugo who is forced to share a room with you for about three months due to unexpected construction works in the college apartment he occupied. The whole Bakusquad was moved to random rooms. To make it worse they were all shared ones. You agreed to take in a male occupant.

Roommate Bakugo who tries to spend as much time outside of the cramped college room as possible. He feels like he's kinda invading your privacy as well as just finding the whole situation uneasy.

Roommate Bakugo who has to complete a bunch of assignments but the library is packed in the late afternoon hours, the air thick with gossip, stress, sweat and annoyance. Bakugo finally wandered off to the dorm room to find some peace for his work.

Roommate Bakugo who spotts you always turn off your lamp and tune down the brightness on your laptop when he tells you he's going to sleep.

"You don't have to do that." He grunts, already wrapped up in heavy covers.

"I don't mind, you do the same." Because he does.

Roommate Bakugo who walks on you watching a film he loves. At first he just circles the small room mindlessly, more interested in the unwrapping dialogue between his two favourite characters than the laundry he's picking up.

"You wanna watch?" You ask, pausing the movie.

"No. I was going to do my laundry."

"I can wait, I can buy some snacks in the meantime, I was looking for an excuse to do it anyway."

So the two of you ended up finishing the film together, sitting on your bed.

Roommate Bakugo who talks to you more, geting used to the situation faster than he thought he would. You both sit by your desks working on the boring college stuff. He spotted you were trying hard, not slacking around and keeping most of your deadlines. Even if he didn't want to admitt it, he was impressed. Not that he didn't do the same, it's just rare to find a person who actually cares.

Roommate Bakugo who didn't know how to phrase a sentence. He was working on a piece of paper for the last two hours after an intense day of workout and his brain refused to cooperate anymore.

"Can I ask you for a favour?" Your face appeared from behind your laptop screen.

"Depends on what is it."

"I finished a short essay and I wanted to ask if you could read it and tell me if it makes sense."

Might as well take a break to refresh his mind. Bakugo read through the text and came to the conclusion that you were a good writer. A very good writer in fact.

"How would you say that in other words?" He asked after you were happy with your work, your laptop tossed aside as you lay on your bed scrolling through your phone.

You skipped to him, read through the sentence and gave him a paraphrase, one that he wouldn't think of himself.

"Thanks."

Roommate Bakugo who was eying you book collection for some time. You had a bunch. When he asked the two of you started talking and in went on and on and on. Finally, you stood up on your bed, the sheets dipping in where you stretched out to reach the highest shelve. Picking out a book you handed it to him.

"My favourite."

So he started to read it.

Roommate Bakugo who got a text from you that you wouldn't be back in the dorms for the night. After a shower he laid down in his bed, shirtless, with your book in hand. It was definitely worth it and he was way past the half already. Suddednly the doors opened only to reveal you, eying him up and down.

"The fuck you doing here?" Suddenly Bakugo felt a tad bit embarassed about his bare chest and lose sweatpants.

"My friend cancelled, sorry, you have someone over?" A small sly grin appeared on yoru lips.

"Jeez no, I'm just half naked."

"I don't mind." You shrugged, throwing your bag on the bed.

And what was that supposed to mean?

Nevermind. Bakugo wanted to get back to the story when he spotted something horrific. His hand gripped a nice chunk of the page, torn out of the book. He must have done it when you startled him with the grand entrance. It was readable as he only torn the cream white but it still looked nasty.

"Shit, I'm sorry." He didn't even look at you, opting on eying the damage, embarassement creaping up his cheeks for destroying someone's else belonging. One of yoru favourite belongings.

You came over, looked at the book and started to laugh.

"What's so fucking funny?" From embarassed Bakugo quickly merged into defensive.

"You look as if you killed my grandma. It's just a book." You saw that it didn't make him feel better, in fact the frown in his brows deepened. "I like my books being used. Lets treat it as a memory of you reading it. Give me the torn piece, please." Your hand reached out and he put the scrap into your open palm.

You skribbled something down on it using a pen fished out of your drawer. When you gave it back to him, the paper read 'Don't stress so much, dummy.'

"You can keep it." A smile brightened your face as you turned around to do other things.

Roommate Bakugo who would never admitt to anyone that he kept that scrap in the back of his phonecase at all times.

Roommate Bakugo who would never admitt to anyone that it took you roughly two months to steal his rock-like heart away.

#bakugou #katsuki bakugou #bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki #bakugo #katsuki bakugo #mha bakugo x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugo x you #bakugo x y/n #bakugo x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #katsuki x reader #mha

[cy-cyborg]

We have communities - Writing disability quick tips

So often, stories centred on disabled characters, especially in modern settings, emphasise how lonely or isolated the character is because of their disability, especially if it’s a newly acquired disability or one that non-disabled people assume would have a big impact on our ability to do “fun stuff”. This will often be accompanied by statements of “no-one understands what living with [insert disability here]” is like!

And while isolation and loneliness are things a lot of disabled people deal with, a lot of us are not completely alone either, especially in the modern day.

Just like any group of people with shared experiences, we find one another. Sometimes this is through formal systems; some spinal rehabilitation centres for example, will pair newly paralysed people up with a mentor who’s had a similar form of paralysis for much longer to help guide the person while the adjust to their new disability. Other more formal systems can look like disability sporting organisations - the one I used to work for used to specifically encourage very newly disabled people to join so they didn’t feel like the had to learn everything about their disability alone, or support groups.

Other times though, these communities are much less formal. They may look like online forums, such as the ones on Reddit, built by and for disabled people to talk about their experiences and seek recommendations from others in the same boat, or parts of larger social media sites. For example, on Tumblr, there aren’t really any formal groups, but thanks to the hashtags we use in our posts, we often find one another fairly quickly there. We sometimes also carve out our own little subsections of fandom or hobby spaces, brought together by the shared interest itself, how things like disability might impact the way you interpret or interact with it, and how we can modify it (in the case of hobbies) to make it work for us.

A lot of disability communities, formal or otherwise, also form out of necessity, such as advocacy groups run by and for disabled people, and those built around ensuring the rights of disabled people are protected.

Isolation and loneliness are problems within the disabled community that many of us deal with, but this tends to be more in the context of isolation from the wider public, exclusion from public spaces and events (despite there being laws that are supposed to stop this because they’re often not enforced), disconnect from non-disabled friends and family, etc, most of which are the result of systematic issues or the lack of understanding or care and support from non-disabled people in our lives. Not always, but often.

The communities made by and for disabled people though are often (at least in part) made to help make up for this, and they’re more common than you might think, you just have to know where to look. It would be nice to see more creators reflecting this in their work a bit more often, or at least acknowledging that they are there, even if your character chooses not to engage with them.

However, as a reminder to authors and creatives: These communities, especially the online ones, are for disabled people, they are not there for you to use as a reference as a creator. Some communities are ok with you being there to learn, so long as you listen and don’t try to speak over/bombard their members with questions. Others are not. The ones that are, typically will have something written somewhere if it’s online (e.g. subreddits that accept writers wanting to write disabled characters will often have it written in the “about” section or the rules). There are also dedicated groups and platforms for non-disabled people seeking to learn more about us and our communities, which can be excellent resources for creatives like writers. Just remember to be mindful of where you are and respectful of people’s spaces and boundaries when doing your research.

#Writing disability with Cy Cyborg #Quick tips #Disability #Disabled #Disability Representation #Writing Disability #Writing #Writeblr #Authors #Creators #Writing Advice #Disabled Characters #On Writing

[foxglovebells]

The Winter Writer

Azriel x Reader

Summary: One day Mor brings her best friend to the house of wind for game night with the inner circle. Azriel takes immediate interest, as well as Nesta, Feyre, and Gwyn when they find out she’s the author to their favorite smutty romances.

Warnings: None

Notes: My first fic! This is just the first part and there will me much more to come (😏)

****************************************************

“They’re going to love you” Mor squeals excitedly as she finishes up your makeup. “You have no idea.”

You and Mor had been best friends for centuries. You both knew absolutely everything about each other. Even after all these years you had still never met her family. Though, you weren’t very adamant on pushing it because they made you very nervous. She didn’t want them to scare you away, she had said, when you brought them up once.

You take a deep breath to gather your nerves before replying, “I don’t know Mor, I feel like I’m intruding on your inner circle.” You look up at her from where you’re sitting on the vanity in your apartment. Mor stands and looks down on you as she roles her eyes.

“I don’t think anyone could hate you, you’re like the most likable person I’ve ever met, and trust me, I’ve been alive for a long time.”

You moved to Velaris from the winter court half a century ago. Mor had said she would feel more secure knowing that her best friend was safe and not being caught up in the Amarantha drama. Having parents that had high positions in the Winter court put you too close to danger for Mor’s liking.

While you had never met the inner circle, you had heard almost everything about each one of them. Rhysand was the almighty, powerful high lord who had the biggest soft spot for everyone he loved and cared about. Feyre was kind, selfless, and had a touch for art. Cassian was an Illyrian who was cocky and funny but also gave the best hugs. Amren was a little scary and fierce, but she would always stand up and fight for her friends. Nesta was a tough shell to crack, but she still managed to be the best to talk to when you need advice. Elain was quiet but kind and nurturing. And Azriel, oh Azriel, you had never met him, but Mor always described him as silent, observant, kind, and so many more things. Was it possible to have a crush on someone you’d never met? You based a couple of your book characters on what you had heard of him. Of course, he could be completely different than what you imagined, in that case, you would be severely disappointed.

But even having heard all these things, you’ve yet to meet a single one of them, and because of this you were freaking the fuck out.

“I promise, hun.” She places her hands on either side of your face and looks straight into your eyes, “Plus, I know for a fact that the girls will like you. They have a little book club that has read every single one of your books.” A mischievous expression takes over her face.

“No way, Mor.” Your eyes widen. “You didn’t tell me they’ve read my books.” You shoot up from the vanity chair and pace through the room with your hands twirling a piece of hair to occupy yourself. “Cauldron, Mor, that would have been nice to know.”

Mor throws her head back in laughter, “They haven’t just read them darling, you’re a common talk amongst the library, you’re their favorite.” She walks up and boops you on the nose, you swat her hand away. “Nesta and Feyre are always talking about how sexy they are, I’ve even seen Amren reading one from time to time.”

“Is it too late to back out now?” You sigh in exasperation.

“Even if it wasn’t, I wouldn’t let you.”

You glare at her, “I know.”

“Come on, sugar plum, we gotta get going.” Before you can protest she takes your hand and winnows you out of your apartment.

***

“Do we even know if she’s real?” Cassian mutters as he nurses a glass of whiskey. “I mean, Mor said she’s lived here for nearly 50 years—and been friends with her for longer—but we’ve never met her.”

“Probably because she didn’t want your horny ass to hit on her.” Azriel buts in as Rhys lets out a laugh in agreement.

“Your not much better, brother.” Cassian shoots him an amused glare but it’s ignored as Az takes a sip from his glass.

“I can’t say I’m not curious, though.” Rhys starts, “Mor said she was trustworthy enough to know about Velaris, and that she knew her for centuries before she moved here.”

“And yet we��ve never met her and when ever she comes up Mor shuts the subject down.” Cassian replies.

It did make Azriel wonder, he could send his shadows to get information on her, but she’s coming tonight so he might as well just wait and ask her—like a normal person.

All at once the 3 brothers perked up as soon and the felt someone winnow into the house.

“Guess it’s time to finally meet the mystery girl.” Rhys says before sauntering off and going to the main living area where the girls were already there drinking wine and gossiping about the latest book by their favorite author—Y/n Y/l/n.

***

When they enter the room Feyre, Nesta, Elain, Gwyn, and Emerie are all sitting in front of the fire, drinking wine and giggling quietly.

“Where’s Nyx, darling?” Was the first thing Rhys asks as he makes his way to Feyre’s side and places a loving kiss on her cheek.

Azriel always envied their mating bond, Cassian’s too. He had waited so long to feel the love of a mate, but he would wait as long as it took. He often tried to occupy his heart with harmless relationships to fill the void that hopefully would one day be filled with his mate. But even after centuries of waiting he had yet to even suspect someone. It made him insecure sometimes, how could anyone love someone as scared and broken as him? So to refrain from thinking these thoughts he buried himself into other activities, spying, reading, training. Anything that could take his mind off of the restless thoughts that invaded his brain.

“He ran off to greet Mor.” She replied while leaning into his kiss.

All the males looked slightly of put as they recalled the new unknown guest around around Nyx. Rhys stood straight and was about to go seek them out when they heard the sound of footsteps making their way towards them from the hall.

They all stood and watched as Mor entered the room followed by someone who was still out of view behind Mor.

Mor moved to the side and revealed the most beautiful female Azriel had even seen in his life. You were wearing a silky slip style dress in a deep midnight blue, it contrasted beautifully to the long white waves cascading down to your waist. Winter court, Azriel thought. What caught his attention the most was the small Illyrian at your side with his hand in yours.

“Daddy I found a girl!” Nyx shouts as he tries to drag you towards his father.

You have a small nervous smile on your face and you allow yourself to be dragged towards Rhysand.

“Nyx!” Feyre shoots up from her seat on the chaise and rushes over to snatch up Nyx, releasing your hand in the process. “I’m so sorry.” She says turning to you.

Mor makes her way back up to your side and you look over to her for reassurance. She nods at you and you look back to Feyre with a sweet smile. “That’s all right, nothing to be sorry about” you reply. “I’m Y/n, you must be Feyre.” Rhysand takes Nyx out of his mates arms and you hold out your hand to shake hers. She shakes her head at your hand and instead wraps her arms around you in a hug. You freeze slightly in surprise but quickly relax and return the hug.

“It’s lovely to finally meet you, Y/n. Mor is awfully protective.” Feyre sends a playful glare to your best friend and she returns it with a sheepish smile. You simply laugh at the exchange.

Mor takes your arm and walks you to the seating area and you take a seat on an armchair close to the fire.

“Y/n,” Mor starts, “This is Nesta, Elain, Gwyn, Emerie and you’ve already met Feyre.” She takes her time pointing to each female around the room. Gwyn and Nesta are sat beside each other on a two seater lounge while Elain sits on the arm chair across from you. Mor walks over to Emerie and lays a hand on her shoulder. You try to hide your smirk behind your hand as you glance between the two of them. The look she gives you is a mix between shut the fuck up and she’s hot isn’t she. It became clear to you that her family doesn’t know about her sexually orientation, that became more clear when you caught the confusion in the eyes of a couple of the others.

“Anyway,” she claps her hands together and walks back to where Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel were standing. “This is Rhysand—“

“Call me Rhys, please, any friend of Mor’s is a friends of mine.” You smile at him before Mor continues.

“Then my most favorite nephew, Nyx, whom you’ve already met.” She walks up and pinched the little boys cheeks, who squirms in his dads arms, resulting in him putting Nyx down. Nyx does something no one expects—especially not you—when he runs up to you, climbs onto your chair, and settles into your lap as if nothing was wrong in the world. Every one stares in shock while you just let it has happen, chuckling slightly.

Azriel watches you along with everyone else, but the thought churning in his mind aren’t ones that revolve around Nyx, no, the only thing he can think about is how, beautiful and sweet you are, he might not be able to forgive Mor for keeping you from him. Of course, not literally, but he had never felt to drawn to someone, especially not someone he had never met in his life.

“Sorry.” You say with a small laugh. “Is he normally this friendly?” You look up to see Feyre snickering and Rhys shaking his head in amusement. Mor just looks as if she’s having a proud mother moment.

“Not usually, but he doesn’t meet new people often.” Rhys supplies. “But if he’s bothering you feel free to tell us, we won’t be offended.”

“Oh no, he’s perfect.” You look to the little boy in your lap who’s the split image of his father. His big violet eyes are looking up at you as you smile down at him.

You remember that you hadn’t been introduced to everyone yet. “And I’m guessing these two are Cassian and Azriel.” You gesture to each of them.

Cassian beamed at you, “The one and only, nice to meet you Y/n.”

“You too, Cassian.”

Azriel kept silent but he gave you a forced tight lipped smile, that made your stomach drop a little. He didn’t like you, you concluded.

You looked over to Mor who noticed the interaction and noticed that slightly devastated look on your face. She was quick to change the subject.

“Nice going, asshole.” Cassian says to Azriel out of your ear shot, “She thinks you hate her.”

“What?” Azriel heart sinks, “Why would she think that?” He could never hate you, he knew it the minute he saw you. He wanted to talk to you but he didn’t know what to say.

“You gave her the same obviously fake smile that you give every female that any of us try to set you up with.” Cassian sends him a looks that screams could you be any more oblivious, “Didn’t you see her smile drop slightly and her look to Mor for reassurance?”

No, he did not, and now he feels like a dick. “I didn’t mean too.” He replies solemnly.

“Y/n’s from the winter court. We became friends the first time a visited when I was a child.” Mor smiled at you cheekily before continuing, “I wanted her to move here a few decades ago—“

“—because you’re like an overprotective mother hen.” You cut her off with a laugh but she shushes you playfully.

“No,” she asserts firmly with a glare in your direction, “Well, yes I guess a little.” The group around you laughs.

“If she’s lived here for decades why have we never met her?” Cassian asks and Mor roles her eyes at the questions.

“Did you not hear Y/n, Cass, protective mother hen.” She gestures to herself while you along with everyone else smiles at the interaction. “She needed protecting from the like of you, all of you and your corrupt sense of humor. Now, drinks.”

“Ugh, Yes please” and other mutters of agreement are heard from all around. Rhysand snaps his fingers and wine appears atop the coffee table at the center of the seating.

Elain pours you a glass and hands it to you, you smile gratefully. Nyx has since fallen asleep on your lap, his face tucked into your neck and you run your hand over his head while paying attention to conversation around you.

“So Y/n, you want to tell everyone what you do for a living?” Mor says, bringing everyone’s attention to you once more, though, you couldn’t help but notice that one particular person attention had been on you the whole time.

You glare at Mor, a real glare this time, no playfulness in your stare. “Morrigan, what did we talk about.” You say to her while everyone listens with interest. She doesn’t reply, but instead hold your stare with a challenging look. Eventually giving up you cave. “I’m an author.”

“I expected something completely different from the way you two were looking at each other.” Nesta laughs as she finished her glass of wine.

“Me too.” Pipes Gwyn who was sitting on the lounge where Feyre had once been. Feyre was now curled up in the lap of the high lord. “Are you published.”

“Um—” you hesitate.

“Yes, she is.” Mor states simply once she’s decided that you’re taking far to long to answer such an easy question.

“Do you think we’d know any?” Gwyn asks curiously. “The girls and I are in a book club, I’m sure we’ve had to at least heard of it.”

“Oh I write under pseudonym, you probably haven’t heard of me.” You attempt to laugh it off, but Nesta and Gwyn seem keen on getting the answer out of you.

“Try us.” Nesta pushes.

“Sellyn Drake.” You say quietly with a slight embarrassed chuckle. Please tell me they haven’t read my books, please, please, ple—

“Fucking shit!” Nesta shoots up, her refilled glass of wine spilling over the lip of the glass. Every female in the room seems to sit up, even Feyre from where she was comfortably tucked into Rhysand.

“You’re kidding, right?” Gwyn shrieks with an excited smile on her face.

“You’ve heard of me?” You say sheepishly.

“Heard of you!” Nesta snaps her fingers and every single book that you’ve ever published appears directly in front of you. You reach for a book, trying not to jostle the sleeping Illyrian in your arms. Opening the book you’re surprised to see annotations on every page, highlighted words and thoughts fill each blank space.

“Um wow, I didn’t expect this.” You laugh as you flip through the pages coming across and especially spicy scene before slamming the book shut and placing it back on the pile.

“Would it be weird if I asked you to sign them?”

“Not at all, how about we meet for coffee sometime, I can even bring the manuscript for my next book, I’ve been looking for some insight on it.” You suggest, a little bit nervous that she might turn you down.

“Holy shit, of course!” She looks over to Feyre, Gwyn, and Emerie. “You know what? What do you think about coming to our next book club meeting?”

You return her excitement at that, “That sounds perfect.”

Nesta excitedly goes to Cassian and plops in his lap. His arms wrap around her waist and kisses her neck.

“You’re the smutty romance author, eh.” Cassian guesses in response to his mates excitement.

Your face burns red and you attempt to hide it by looking away. Azriel watched the exchange with a barely there smirk on his face. Ah maybe he could use that as a conversation starter, he thought. He would only have to get you alone first. He observed that you weren’t to comfortable talking about your occupation in a large group like this with new people. Though, he didn’t understand why an extremely successful author wouldn’t want to flaunt her talents.

“Y/n?” Starts Rhys. “Are you comfortable talking about your family?” He didn’t want to pry, but he was curious, something about you was just so familiar.

“Oh, of course.” You loved your family dearly and enjoyed any excuse to talk about them, especially your sister. “My sister is the lady of the winter court.”

“Viviane?” Feyre asks and you nod in response.

“Yes, we’re fraternal twins.” You smile as you think about your twin sister who was such a talented warrior.

“She’s amazing, and so is my niece, Seely, who was born 3 years ago, about the same age as Nyx actually.” You gesture to the sleeping form wrapped in your arms.

“I hadn’t realized you had such useful connections—” Rhys starts.

“—No.” Mor cuts him off before he can continue. “You are not using my best friend for a winter court alliance. You want an alliance, figure out how to get it without using her as pawn.”

Rhys looked apologetic, “She’s right, I apologize Y/n.”

“No harm done, if it’s any reassurance Kallias and Vivian are rather fond of your inner circle. I’m sure if you ever did want an alliance you wouldn’t have trouble achieving it, with or without my assistance.” You reply, you truly didn’t mind, you actually found it quite comforting that he was willing to talk politics with you, even if it was an odd situation to do so.

A new voice speaks up, surprising everyone in the room. “So you can fight?” Azriel kicks off from his place in the shadows against the wall, finally stepping into the light of the fire and taking the empty seat to your left.

“What do you mean?” You ask him to specify.

“We’ll Viviane is a highly trained warrior, and I’ve seen how well trained the winter court army is. I was wondering if you were trained similarly.”

“Yes, Viviane and I were trained by our father from the moment we could walk.” You smile in remembrance, your father was such a good teacher and was kind and gave you advice on how to improve rather than yelling. Many of your favorite memories were training beside him and your sister. “It’s been several years though, I probably a bit rusty.”

“I could always help.” He rushes out, as if he didn’t really mean to say that. He clears his throat. “I mean, if you ever wanted to train again I would be happy to be your partner.” Azriel cursed himself for not controlling his words, he hoped you wouldn’t turn him down.

“I would love that Azriel, thank you.” You smile widely at him and you look back to the group.

Feyre stands up and begins to make her way towards you. “As much fun as this has been I really need to get Nyx into his bed.”

“Of course, do you want to take him or I would be happy to walk up with you so he doesn’t wake.” You offer, cradling Nyx against your chest in preparation for her answer.

“That would be amazing, Y/n.” She smiles graciously at you. You stand from the comfy armchair and follow Feyre out of the room and through a series of hallways. She comes to a bedroom and you both go in and put Nyx to bed. “I’ve never seen him act so attached to someone new before. He really likes you.”

“I’m glad, I really like him too.” You both make your way back to the sitting room as you yawn.

“I’ve had so much fun, but I really should get going before I become too tired to winnow home.” You stay standing up instead of sitting back down. You were sure that if you sat back down you would surely fall asleep.

“Stay the night, please.” Rhys offers, “you could join us tomorrow for breakfast and training.”

“And a book club meeting, the girls and I have one in the library tomorrow.” Nesta adds while each of the girls agrees.

“I don’t know,” you start to reply “I don’t want to intrude—”

“Y/n! How many times do I have to repeat myself before you process it in you thick skull.” Mor throws her hand up, exasperated. “You. Are. Not. Intruding.”

You fidget with a strand of your snowy white hair before replying. “Just because you feel that way doesn’t mean the others do. You’re biased Mor.”

“Oh Mother.” She pinches the bridge of her nose as if you are a insulant child.

“If you fear that you are intruding I can guarantee that you are not.” Feyre tells you kindly, a much kinder approach than Mor’s.

You’re still hesitant, but you make up your mind. “Alright, I guess I’ll stay.”

Everyone looks content with your response. But it’s Nesta who’s the first to talk. “Perfect. Training starts at sunrise.”

#azriel #azriel x reader #azriel x oc #azriel x you #mor #Rhysand #Feyre #Nyx #Acotar #night court #winter court #author #sellyn drake #books #foxglovebells

[rosewine-5]

Eyes Never Lie

gif made by margeretmarch

Coriolanus Snow x b!woc capitol reader

(Contains spoilers for T.B.O.S.&S)

A.N: what the hell is a p.o.v anyways, it bounces from one character to another. I am not the best writer so if you see a spelling mistake/ typo I apologize, I’ll get better.

A.N 2.0 : this might get a part 2 because my mind got one idea, then another and I just RAN with it.

Word Count: 4.2k words (trust me, it was more)

———

When the both of you first met, it just so happened to be your first year at the academy. At the time, you were only acquainted to one person, a nice boy who, despite his riches, was very humble, and dare you say good looking: Sejanus Plinth. He had approached you, making civil conversation, and before long you both discovered the two of you had similar thoughts and opinions, particularly about the capitol.

That was when you first laid eyes on him. The tall blue eyed blonde boy. From the look on his face, anyone could tell he was a little nervous, hell everyone was a bit nervous to be here, being the first day and all. But flexing your hand every 5 seconds is a clear sign you’re about to pass out from fear. That was when you approached him, Sejanus not too far behind.

When he turned to you, his eyes widened a little, shocked someone was looking to make conversation with him. While his eyes went from in between Sejanus and yourself, yours stayed on his face. He kept a calm face, not showing a lot of expression, one free lesson growing up you had mastered.

Even though you were blessed to grow up in the capitol, you never much cared for the people, viewing the other districts almost like animals and not people infuriated you.

But you were good at hiding your expression behind your eyes, and this boy was good at it too. Too good. In fact, you couldn’t tell what he was thinking, “Odd, I can usually tell, even guess what people think.” Not him, not Coriolanus Snow, as he introduced himself. You knew of him, just not anything about him other than his family name.

As years went by, it became clear the 3 of you would be close friends, but your feelings for Coriolanus grew deeper than yours for Sejanus. You couldn’t see Sejanus as much as you could Coriolanus, so naturally you would have a deeper connection. The both of you even walked to school most of the time because you lived so close together.

Today you decided to add a couple of beads onto your braids this morning and walked out of the house. After walking a couple of blocks, you spotted Coriolanus just walking outside, and waving to you. “You’re up early.” You said, giving him a short hug which he returned. “I didn’t want to be late.” You rolled your eyes as he said that, “You’ve never been late to class, ever.”

He looked forward, a smirk on his face. “Can’t afford to be late.” He always answered. You looked up at him, his eyes never wavering from the road ahead. “You know why.” He then added, to which you nodded as a reply.

You discovered his true reasoning of why he strived to be top of the class by chance. He had gotten sick as he was walking home, having an uncontrollable coughing fit and fell out on the grass. You refused to let him walk home alone and that was the first time you had seen him so vulnerable. He almost looked embarrassed when you helped him in his home and to his room.

As you helped him out of his jacket, he slowly laid back. You went to get a towel to wipe the blanket of sweat off his forehead. As you came back, he caught your hand. “I’m sorry you had to see this.” He weakly said, returning your attention to him,” Go ahead, laugh at me.” I shook your head, “Why would I? You’re my friend.” You then took the towel and wiped the sweat off his forehead.

“I may have been raised capitol, Coriolanus, but I was also raised with a soul. I’d do anything to survive and succeed in this life, who am I to judge you for doing the same thing?”

For a moment the only thing in the room was the sound of his breathing as his hand reached for your hand, and kissed it, before holding it firmly, never looking away from you. You looked in his eyes, and for the first time you could finally see what he was thinking, “Thank you”. You then nodded, not needing him to say a word as you stood up, and kissed his forehead, “Get some rest, Corio, you need it.” As you walked out of the home, you walked in silence.

You felt like a terrible friend, not knowing how much he was going through. But that wasn’t the only reason, your heart soared when his lips kissed your hand. Sure it might have been an innocent gesture, but the way he looked at you made your heart stop for a second. Sometimes you swear he did it on purpose.

During the last academy year, the closer you got to Coriolanus, the more you realized you truly loved him, and sometimes you thought he loved you back. The walks to the academy became slower and somehow his hand always found yours. At one point you had to run to get there on time, earning the both of you harsh stares from Dean Highbottom and smirks from Sejanus.

The both of you also agreed to study together whenever you could, even including Sejanus whenever he was free. There was no doubt in your mind that either you or Coriolanus would be top of the class, and receiving the Plinth Prize. And if you were the one who came out on top, you would give Coriolanus the funds he needed, whatever they would be.

While you two studies for the last test, he smiled when you rolled his eyes. “Alright smartass, you’re going to pass.” You said. Suddenly, he pulled you into his arms, and hugged you tightly.

You then felt his voice break, “Thank you.” He softly said. “You’re my friend, I’d help you with anything.” You said, looking up at him, a smile splitting your face. As you walked to class the next day & took the exam, he had a sly smirk on his face the whole day. Even at lunch he didn’t drop it. “Someone in a real good mood.” Sejanus said, nudging his shoulder. “Yeah, what’s got you in a good mood?” You teasingly asked. “You know.” He said, looking at you, the smirk turning into a smile, which all of your mirrored.

As the two of you walked back home he had a smile on his face again. Confidence. As he stayed close behind you, you stopped when you got to his doorstep. “So, here’s to winning the Plinth Prize tomorrow.” You said, giving him one last hug, which he returned. That was when you lifted your head to look up at him, but he was already looking down at you. Once again, you couldn’t read the thoughts behind his eyes, but you could make a good guess. He only had that similar look when it was just the two of you together: admiration.

“What is it?” You asked, a nervous chuckle leaving your mouth. He only shook his head, offered you a smile, finally releasing you from the embrace. “See you tomorrow, Calanthe.” He whispered before going inside. “One day I’ll look up what that name means.” You said to yourself, walking home.

The next day, graduation day. You woke up early to get your makeup on, slicking your edges back, and, to enhance your braids, added a gold charm in the middle. Afterwards you got dressed in the outfit Tigris made for your graduation. She insisted on it and told you she wouldn’t take no for an answer. As you walked to their home, you heard your name being called from behind you. Tigris was waving you down before hugging you excitedly. “Turn around for me!” She said, making you twirl as she admired her work.

As you waited, you saw Grandma’am clip a rose and walk out of her room. “Oh, dearie don’t you look gorgeous.” She said, smiling at you and opening her arms to you. You met her in the middle and gave her a light hug. “Not a gorgeous as you, Grandma’am.” You said, smiling at her kind words. She then walked forward and after an exchange of words, pinned the rose to his vest.

His eyes finally met yours, and then they took in your dress. He walked forward and kissed your hand, a now normal occurrence between the two of you. “Shall we?” He asked, before walking the both of you out the door. As the two of you walked to the academy, you could feel his eyes on you. “You look beautiful.” He said, giving you a smile, and making your heart soar once more.

“And you look dashing today.” You complimented, not missing the red tint on his cheeks. As you two walked up the stairs, his arm looped into yours. “Never missed a class, never been late.” He said to himself. “Corio, you got this.” You said, encouraging him, he offered you a small smile just as a new and familiar voice broke the moment.

“Why Coriolanus Snow.” You saw the small smirk grow on his face. “Clemie.” He said, offering him his other arm. “Hey girl.” She said, nodding to you, and getting a smile in return. “Two girls on your arm, must be your lucky day.” Clemmie teased and making Corio roll his eyes. As she continued to talk, your mind went to the graduation. You were getting more nervous than usual.

Something felt off today, and you didn’t like it.

You didn’t realize you had stayed in a trance until Sejanus walked up beside you, breaking the gaze. “Sejanus, you made it to the reaping for once.” “And you made it to graduation, Festus, we’re both shocked.” After hearing Sejanus’ quips, you went to sit down. You didn’t know why your nerves were acting up, but you couldn’t kick this feeling. “You ok?” You heard a voice ask, Sejanus was standing over you, concern in his eyes. “I’m just nervous about today.” You said, making him nod in response.

“Well, you may be right.” He said, sitting done next to you. That made the hair on the back on your neck stand up. And the look on his face didn’t help either. “What do you mean?” You asked, but getting no answer. Then as the rest of the students sat down, you saw why he was so silent. After it was announced there would be no more Plinth Prize, you looked at Coriolanus, who had a worried expression on his face.

However, when it was announced that the graduates would be mentors of the Hunger Games, that was when you froze, and your mind started to race.

There’s 25 graduates.

There are only 24 tributes.

Someone isn’t getting a tribute.

Going from district to district, started to guess who had a good chance at winning. Your heart broke when one girl, Dill, was pulled out. You stared to wonder if she had been voted so she could die in the arena. When it got to the district 12 female tribute, it was down to you and Coriolanus. His hand found yours and held it tightly, but you didn’t know who was holding on tighter.

“The runt girl from district twelve, she belongs to Coriolanus Snow.”

And that was when you knew he was the one holding on to you. He squeezed your hand so hard you almost thought he broke it.

The tribute: Lucy Gray, was wearing a colorful dress with a corset top. You had to admit, she was beautiful, and so was her dress. You watched as she put a snake on a girls dress, making you smirk. “I love her already” you thought to yourself. But then your mind suddenly came back to reality, you didn’t have a tribute. What did I do wrong? Did I pass? Did I fail?

The only thing that broke your trance was a voice singing, then another. You saw Lucy Gray stand up, and continue to sing by herself. “YOU CAN KISS MY ASS!” She then screamed. As the rest of the people laughed at her, you and Coriolanus shared a look: I like her.

As the laughter started to die down, one voice spoke up. “If you didn’t receive a tribute, report to Dr. Gaul.” Highbottom’s voice spoke up, and then it was silent. All eyes turned toward you, and it made you want to curl up in a ball and die. Sejanus’ hand found yours, giving you a silent squeeze of encouragement, and Coriolanus’ did the same. You then walked towards the woman, a small smile gracing her face.

“Let’s have a talk, child.” She said, her hand finding your back, leading you away from the hall. You were only able to catch a small glimpse of Coriolanus’ worried expression as you went down the hallway. She started to hum a tune while she led you to her lab. You had never been here, but you always wanted to get a peek. “Guess I got my wish.”

“I’ve been watching you, dear, for a long time.” She said, going further into the room. “Almost the top of your class, but you could never quite get that edge.” Dr. Gaul said, pinching her fingers together. “Why am I here?” You asked, finally finding your voice. Dr. Gaul then raised her eyebrows, and then let out a dark chuckle. “Let me ask you: What do you crave most in this world?”

You sighed, “To survive and thrive in this world.” She nodded, “Good answer.” She said, smiling. “You and your friend, Coriolanus, you two are good friends. Bonds like that build trust, those bonds can help you live as much as they can destroy you.” Dr. Gaul said, going to one of her glass cases in her lab. You didn’t know what the hell was in it, and frankly, you didn’t want to know. “I’ve known President Ravinstill for a long time, and we both live well, and thrive.” She said, putting her hand on your shoulder before looking down at you.

“I see myself in you, child. You thirst for survival, but to thrive you need to reach for power,” that was when she gave you a deadpanned look, “that’s why I pulled you from the games.” Your eyes widened at the realization, and she smiled once more. “You don’t need the Plinth Prize when you got mommy and daddy’s money. Why settle for a housewife when you have the brains of game maker.”

You almost shouted when she finished, “Game maker?” You said, to which she nodded. “You’ve always been a curious child, a strong appetency for knowledge.” Dr. Gaul said, putting her gloved hand under your chin. “You want a look behind the curtain? You wanna know how the puppeteer makes the strings? You need to join the magic show.”

You thought about your options, but you knew this opportunity wouldn’t come around twice. Almost like she knew your answer, Dr. Gaul then took you hand, and led you deeper into her lab.

After talking for hours, you knocked on Coriolanus’ door and it immediately opened to a shocked Tigris. “Where’s Corio?” You asked, after hugging her. It didn’t take long for him to come around the corner and hugged you tightly. “What happened? Did you get hurt?” He asked, but you stopped his hand as he examined your face. “I’m okay. Dr. Gaul just pulled from the competition.” You calmly said, and immediately regretted it, the faces of Tigris and Coriolanus going from worry to shock. “Why?” He asked.

She told me she’d be mentoring me from now on. I’ll be studying under her from now on, as well as continuing my classes.” His eyebrows rose before hugging her again. “That’s great news.” He said, but then I hugged him tighter. “For a moment, I thought my life was done for.” He nodded, and then looked you deep in the eyes. “We will get through this. I promise you.” You left a few minutes later, but before you got down the street, Coriolanus caught you “Hey!” He shouted, making you turn around. He was running towards you, holding out a wrapped cloth.

“I meant to give you this at the graduation, but you were pulled away.” He said. You unwrapped it, and smiled when you saw the flower charm. You smiled and held it tightly. “I meant to get a charm for this one day.” You said, looking up at him. “Guess I beat you to it.” He said, before returning the smile. “Meet me at the train tomorrow. I have a plan on how to get in Lucy Gray’s good graces.” You nodded and went home afterwards.

The next morning you got up early and put your uniform on before walking to the station, where Coriolanus was already talking to Lucy Gray, who saw you walking up to them. “Another mentor?” She suddenly said, turning towards you, pointing a white rose in your direction, obviously a gift from Coriolanus. Smart.

That was when he turned to you, and put an arm around you. “This is Lucy Gray. Lucy Gray, this is my closest friend.” He said, and you gave her a smile. “Another rebel?” She said, looking at you. “If it fits,” you said, shrugging, before leaning closer to her. “ loved the stunt you pulled with the snake by the way.” You added, making her smirk.

The moment was cut short when a peacekeeper nudged her and the male tribute towards a vehicle. “It was lovely to meet you two.” She said, before being led away to the back of a van. You then saw his eyes go to the van, and then it clicked in your head. “Corio, don’t.” You said, but it was too late. He was running toward the van, and you were following close behind him. It finally registered what you just did when he slammed the door behind him and felt the van move, going wherever it was going.

And now here you two were.

In a vehicle.

Full of tributes who were looking at the two of you like lions to lambs. Corio put you beside him, putting you closer to the tribute from 2 and the wall. “Hi.” He said, his voice sounding weak. “You in the wrong cage pretty boy, pretty girl?” The tribute Realer asked, tilting his head to look at you. “This cage is delightful.” He said, and then Reaper went towards Corio, pinning him to the back. You yelped when you were then surrounded by the tributes. “Shit.” You thought.

Somewhere between the exchange between Corio and the other tributes, you felt the truck come to a sudden stop, getting everyone’s attention. That was when you felt the truck start to tilt forward, everyone started to slide down. In one swoop you reached for Lucy’s hand as she reached for yours as Coriolanus wrapped one arm around your waist and your free arm around his shoulders. The three of you were able to hang on to each other as the other tributes began to slide down and out of the van. The three of you followed suit after the harness broke, sending you all tumbling out of the truck.

Lucy slid down first, with you and Corio falling out last. He was able to wrap both of his arms around you before everyone let out groans and curses from falling on rocks. When you were able to look up, you realized exactly where you were: The Capitol Zoo. And if fate couldn’t make it any better, Lucky Flickerman was in front of the pen, with his entourage of cameramen. “You gotta be kidding me.” You said, groaning and leaving you head down, only to be met with a blue shirt.

As you lifted your head, you were face to face with Coriolanus, who, somehow, had managed to keep his hold on you when everyone tumbled out of the van. “You ok?” You asked, to which he nodded. “Yes. Are you ok?” He asked, and you nodded in response. His eyes went to your necklace and the rose charm attached to it, a smile blooming on his face. His hand touched it, “You put it on.” He said in a soft tone & a tender look in his eyes.

As you both smiled at each other, you felt one hand go to your cheek and to then the other to your waist. The rest of Panem melted away as his breath hit your face. You forgot about being in the capitol, being Gaul’s student, and the tributes around you as you looked in between his eyes and his lips. “Calanthe.” He whispered, his voice so soft it was almost a whisper. That was until the voice of Flickerman broke the moment. “Are those academy students?” He said, and the both of you looked up to see the camera pointed directly at you.

“You guys ok?” Lucy asked, walking up to the both of you. “Yeah, you?” You asked, getting off of Corio and helping him up. The three of you looked around, and sighed. That’s when you began to brainstorm: how could you get out of this without getting expelled? “We gotta get them to love her.” You said to yourself. You then brought your necklace to the front of your shirt before unbuttoning the top button, making the rose charm more visible. “We give them what they want: a performance.” You then walked to Lucy and began to smooth out her hair while Corio broke the white rose and tucked it behind her ear.

He then put her hand out for Lucy to take, which she accepted. He then turned and opened his arm towards you, making you raise your eyebrows. “Trust me.” He whispered, and Lucy nodded towards his arm, and that’s how you found yourself being next to him as he presented Lucy to a pair of children at the cage.

You weren’t only shocked of how he fell into the role of a mentor, but how Lucy played her part as a tribute. She had a smile on her face when she talked to the children, and a calm expression when Flickerman approached and interviewed her. You couldn’t help but smile as she talked about her dress and where she was from. The Covey sounded like it was a homely group of people. You couldn’t help but picture how the nature of district 12 looked.

That was when Lucky Flickerman turned towards you. “And who might this lovely lady be? Are you also her mentor?” He asked, the camera’s filling the microphone as it was put in front of you. An innocent smile grew on your face as you shifted your tone into a kind voice, while still having a serious edge to it. “No sir, I’m taking courses from Dr. Gaul instead of being a mentor in the games. I’m here to support my dear friend, Coriolanus Snow.” You said, smiling up at him, which he responded by squeezing you closer to him. “You both seem pretty close for dear friends. How long have you known each other?” Flickerman asked, moving the microphone to Coriolanus.

“Since the first day we went to the academy. She approached me, and we’ve been close ever since. I’ve never known a more intelligent and alluring woman.” He said, and your eyes did a double take at his choice of words. Before you could answer, peacekeepers walked in and escorted you out of the cage. “I’ll come back later.” You said to Lucy Gray, holding her hand for a moment before you were taken away, Corio coming out a minute later. As the both of you walked back to class, you kept looking up at Coriolanus.

“On a scale of one to expelled, how fucked do you think we are?” You asked, making him chuckle. “He wanted us to make them spectacles, he never said how we had to do it.” He said, nudging your shoulder, making you huff out a short laugh. You then took his hand and gripped it tight, which he reciprocated. “To survive and thrive.” You said, walking closer to the classroom. “We will survive these games,” Coriolanus softly said, before stopping you, and making you look up at him. “I promise you.”

LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK

#coriolanus snow x reader #the hunger games #coriolanus snow #tbosas #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #black!reader #black reader #coriolanus snow x black reader #tbosas x black reader #young coriolanus snow #coriolanus x you #coriolanus snow imagine #tom blyth #fanfic #tom blyth fanfiction #tom blyth x you #tom blyth x reader #eyes never lie #coriolanus snow x black! reader #coriolanus snow x black!reader

[kiss-me-muchoo]

𝐇𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐦𝐞, 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐲 || 𝐌𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐎’𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐚 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦! 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

part one || part two: so many signs

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲_ When Miguel fell so hard for an anomaly that ended up being another one of his canon events; a soulmate. Only that it was late, very late.

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬_ fluff, angst?, reader is a hot Hispanic sunshine, plot twist at the end, age gap? (How old is Miguel?, like 28, early 30's?, reader is like 20 not specified) I'm 19, so in my head reader is 20, fuck it <3.

𝐀𝐍_ hellooo, this is my Ist fic for this fandom, I've been trying to hide this crush for weeks, I can't anymore.

♪ ♫ 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙒𝙊𝙍𝙎𝙏 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙮𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙈𝙞𝙜𝙪𝙚𝙡 𝙈𝙤𝙟𝙖𝙧𝙧𝙖.

<3,𝙄𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙭 (+fics)

_________________

[11 months before the events of SPIDER-MAN: ATSV]…

Nothing is perfect; nothing can be that special. But somehow, you ended up being that, at least almost. 

Because this is how everything starts; you were stressing out for college sophomore year finals when in the middle of your room, a portal opened and absorbed you. 

Sounds incredibly ridiculous and cringe… Right?. Sorry, but it’s about to get worse.

The portal only left you there, hanging between random universes, and out of nowhere, a spider bit you. And seconds later, you were back at home stressing over the finals.

Yeah, you didn’t think it would be a problem, only that it increased your phobia of spiders. Later, you accepted that Los Angeles would have an arachnid vigilante. 

Yeah, Los Angeles. No shit, you wouldn’t fly to save New York in your universe just to fit the stereotype. Besides, they already had one, the most significant and original anomaly, Miles Morales.

That’s for later, by the way.

You had your suspicions that the multiverse existed but no curiosity. You only cared about your sacred California and, to be more specific, your friends and family. 

So it goes; you were a sparkly spider-girl with glitter webs and fantastic hair, saving people from the crime on Skid Row, abusive elites in Downtown, corruption in Glendale, and extortions from Santa Clarita. 

Your family knew about it, and your friends too. They helped to pick out your surname; Aragmatica.

So you had everything; no pressure from being the spider-girl Aragmatica, wonderful friends, and family. A transcription remote job and a firm college pathway to be a writer and teacher. 

Except for one thing; love.

You didn’t have anyone to hold, anyone who made you laugh like never. Someone who made you feel the scarlet blush and raced heartbeats.

Nah, fuck that. You don’t need a man. 

________

Warm day in Hollywood Hills, 12:00 pm. 

Finally, your official transcript from that year was carefully sealed in an envelope. Summer break was yours, starting with a good ballet class.

Your spider senses weren’t fully developed because you never saw 4 pair of eyes watching you.

The class was fun, though. All the music was from the most famous plays, and having the opportunity to wear a tutu was always accepted. 

You didn’t care coming out of the building wearing it after the friendly teacher gifted you the fluffy piece of clothing.

You also didn’t care to sing slightly aloud as you walked towards your car. 

And that’s when 4 individuals interfered with your way; Peter B. Parker, Hobie Brown, and Gwen Stacy.

“Uh… nice cosplays. But the Comic-Con is more to the south. In San Diego…” They looked at each other. Only the older guy stepped further, laughing.

“Oh, you’re funny. There’s also one in my universe, but it’s celebrated in Coney Island and-“ only that Gwen pinched him. The older man frowned.

“She’s leaving, Peter,” Gwen said. 

“Hey! Wait!” Peter stopped you from closing your car door, and you looked more confused than ever.

“Dude, back off. There’s a kid between us. You don’t want to do this…” Hobie giggled. He had remained leaning against a mailbox during the whole interaction.

“What? No-, I-. We need to talk to you… we’re also spider people” Rolling your eyes, you just rested your head on the steering wheel.

“Yeah, your suits are too good to cosplay. I like your pointe shoes though” Gwen blushed but said thank you for your flattery. 

“I’m Peter Parker. The guy with the cool outfit that’s Hobie Brown. And the girl with the pointe shoes you liked is Gwen Stacy” They looked lovely. Hobie and Gwen, probably your age, but you were running late for dinner. You had to drop the transcript for validation in early registration for a master's program.

You didn’t have time for this Have you heard of the Avengers initiative? moment.

The best you could do was politely turn them down. But they were already inside your car. 

“Hey!. Okay, if this is some spider intervention, I don’t have time to travel between universes and that stuff” Hobie started playing your radio. Again, you rolled your eyes.

“This is good music, girl. Nice…” he said, making you smile a little. He seemed nicer.

“Thanks, but…” Then Gwen interrupted you.

“You could be dangerous or cause a massive disaster for the canon. You are a rare case between spiders” For the first time, you were quiet. Maybe that omen was this, that not everything could be perfect.

“You felt it….” Peter said because your silence was loud enough to tell him. 

“You knew about us then?” 

“The multiverse and variations are not a thrill in this universe. I wasn’t expecting this on a random Friday afternoon,” you explained.

“Our boss wants to meet you. We need to know what type of anomaly you are” They all heard you sighing. You had too many questions but were tired, so you wouldn’t be annoying. 

“Okay.” Peter shrugged in disbelief.

“That’s it?. No questions?” Gwen passed you a blue band, probably to travel between universes.

“She’s not energetic nor annoying. Miguel will like her,” Hobie stated, comfortable in the passenger seat. 

“Just don’t smile too much, avoid questions, and you’ll be fine” Humming in agreement, you waited.

A portal of bright colors and blinding flashes appeared seconds later from your car's windshield. It was different from what you expected. In the movies looked easier.

“Okay, here we go…” Peter announced. And with fast blood pressure, you followed them. 

The first thing you felt was the urge to complain on the ground. Laying on your stomach, with your hair in a now disheveled bun. 

Everyone turned to look at you, finally noticing you were wearing a tutu and leotard in grey and black colors. 

“Lost your hoodie?” Gwen asked, being the first to start giggling, followed by the others.

“Could any of you have alerted me to prepare for this type of landing?” You asked anyone in particular. Then you analyzed Gwen’s question. 

“MY hoodie!. Damnit, it was new!” And that’s how you lost 75 dollars. But soon, you stopped thinking about the new tour merch you lost.

It was a bright earth, futuristic and agitated. And as soon as you entered the giant building, you noticed it was full of spider people. 

From any size to any color, but… no one was similar to you. Well, you didn’t have a suit yet, but… you couldn’t feel a spider sense with anyone.

“Surprised?” Gwen asked, walking by your side. 

“Well. I’d rather say disturbed,” she giggled.

“You’re unlike any spider I’ve met,” the blonde added.

“I can’t be special. I must be the most boring spider-girl….” Bored or not, you were missing dinner. Your family would be worried if you didn’t come back past midnight. Hopefully, your first interaction with another universe will be quick.

“That’s why you must be here…” said a new voice.

A pregnant spider-woman?. Could you feel any weirder?.

“Yeah…I’m y/n. No suit yet, but I have the name of Aragmatica” She nodded. Her yellow glasses were very cool, you liked her look in general.

“We know that. But let’s go. Miguel needs to see you….” and officially, that was the beginning of everything.

The HQ was futuristic, wide and full of people. Everything was so weird that edged being ridiculous. Until, the group of spiders lead you to a dark room. Full of technology and chemistry stuff.

For the first time, you felt a tingle when he finally faced you; Miguel O’Hara. And to be honest, his broad and tall figure intimidated you. 

He said you were a bizarre anomaly. You were the only spider person who had been bitten between universes. Meaning that you were an accident, nobody was like you. 

Unconsciously, your own canon was building up as every day passed. So your actions were vital for everyone. 

He offered you a place in the group to keep order among universes. Suspicious, but seemed honest at the same time.

“I appreciate the offer, but I have a degree to finish. And I got enrolled for summer ballet classes….” you said, ambling towards the exit.

“No. You need to be a responsible spider girl and do what you’re expected to do,” the man said, intimidating you more as he towered you. Beside getting lost in his amazing hair, intriguing brown eyes and sharp jaw, your thoughts were running. Maybe you were being selfish. Most of the people in the room had lost a lot. You didn’t.

“You just said I’m an accident. There are no expectations from me. I can’t break canon. I’m making my own….” you dared to say, avoiding looking into his brown eyes. 

“You want to find out?” a little closer, and you would touch his chest. Besides, the tingle was back. Miguel also felt it, but he called it on you being angered by this new phase you would enter.

You knew he was going to be hard to deal with. But deep inside, you liked the feeling he had planted on your stomach.

“No…” you admitted. Slightly afraid of losing what you had. He smiled but for less than a second. 

“That’s what I thought” After that, it was history. 

________

Two months. And things were… okay.

You made a great friendship with Peter and Hobie. Something inside you was stopping you from trusting Gwen at all.

Then, Jessica was good but slightly challenging. Even Pavitr was good.

And then, it was Miguel. 

Fucking Miguel O’Hara. He was dead serious every time. Still, you refused to show he could intimidate you.

Like right now, or… at that moment, whatever. 

“He’s going to kill you…” Lyla whispered, moving in circles around you.

“He won’t if someone no va de chismosa,” she frowned.

“He’s going to kill us both, y/n,” she almost yelled. Following you to the briefing of a new case.

“He can’t kill you, Lyla. Be serious…” you stated, shrugging.

“I don’t want to know…” 

“Me neither. So just shush….” The room was almost empty. Only Peter, Hobie, and Jessica were inside.

The sound of the door captured everyone’s attention. Miguel sighed. After that, he stopped talking.

“You’re late….” Of course, he would remark on your irresponsibility.

“Traffic on Venice. What can I say, handsome?” he rolled his eyes and indicated you sit down. 

Earth-238, neon venom, evacuated civilians, blah blah blah. The mission would be easy, and you’d be leaving the room.

“not you, y/n….” Miguel’s voice caught you off guard. When you turned around, Lyla was still whispering to him.

“Bitch…” you whispered.

“Hey, I’ll wait for you,” Hobie said, indicating that he would wait outside the room. 

You nodded at him, smiling as he left.

“Why did you send the evidence of last week’s mission to Jessica instead of me?” He asked, arms crossed. 

“She’s also my boss,” you admitted, avoiding his judgemental brows and gaze.

“I’m in charge. She’s second in command. So?…” you pinched your nose, anxiety creeping over.

“I-…” It was useless; you had to be honest.

“Because uh-, I didn’t want you to see the anomaly recording” he was right. He knew you would be afraid of his reaction. Something inside switched to be softer. 

“I almost killed that girl. It was an accident, but… I can’t control this new ability. And I want to do a good job” Your anxiety was evident. Miguel had to suppress a smile.

“You have a big responsibility on your shoulders. The power to retain or doom canon” a lecture was coming. And you wished he wore his mask because you could see his whole features. Making it prone to capture any negativity from him. 

“And that’s why you must be on missions with me, not Jessica. I’m training you, not her” To be honest, you were surprised. 

“You make me nervous all the time. I’m afraid I’ll make something stupid on any of these days, and you’ll send me home” He kind of chuckled, and it made you beyond surprised.

“I thought you were working on the English degree and summer ballet classes.” 

“You remember it?” Could your heart beat any faster?. His eyes were deep-fixed on yours, and it was killing you in a good way.

“Madre mía, stop giving me that look. I’m gonna piss myself off from nervousness.”

“Don’t be that of a perfectionist. You’re doing good, kid” The pat on your shoulder made you explode.

Right there, you knew it was over. You had a crush on Miguel O’Hara.

____________________

Was it possible to see everything in pink shades and heart sprinkles? That’s how you were looking at every universe. You were starting your lover era.

“PETER! PETER!” You yelled, running towards the man, heading out of the cafeteria. Most spider people on the headquarters looked at you, but you didn’t care.

“Woah, calm down, girl,” he said with a smile.

“I need to tell you something” he couldn’t describe your excitement but happily took your hand when you pushed him inside an empty conference room.

“I have a crush on Miguel,” you said with an evident blush.

“YOU WHAT?” He asked yelling.

“I know, I know. But… he’s so sweet to me. He said I shouldn’t be nervous about him and that I was doing good. He remembers my career and that I’m doing ballet classes. Oh, and today he opened the door for me TWICE!” You explain excited, pinching your suit, in pearl and iridescent tones with a sparkly spider resting on your chest. 

“This is insane. Are you insane, y/n?. We’re talking about Miguel. Our grumpy and snarky boss that gets stressed over the tiniest detail and doesn’t know how to smile” You nodded, rolling your eyes.

“It’s not like he’s the love of my life or destiny, Peter. It’s just a crush….” you tried to convince yourself.

“No, no, no. I disapprove of this. Isn’t he a little older for you?” You sighed.

“Oh, c’mon. MJ is younger than you, Mr. No age gap”

“This is serious, y/n. I’ve known Miguel for a long time. You know what happened to him. I don’t think he’s emotionally ready for this” he was right. But you were confident that this crush wouldn’t be a big issue.

“I know. The least I want to do is hurt him. But once again, it’s just a crush, Peter,” you started coming out of the room. And, like a big coincidence, Miguel was walking through the hallway with Lyla talking to him. 

“Hey, is it okay if I go to your office at lunchtime?” you asked the broad man once he was walking near you. He had his mask, that if you stared too long, it was a severe and scary gaze, but he nodded once. Neither you nor Peter noticed Miguel was actually looking at you. Causing him to feel a weird pricking.

“Sure,” with that, he left with the female IA giving you a bad look.

“What?” Peter asked in disbelief once again.

“See? Nothing to worry about, love,” you said,

_____________

“Don’t be so late, mija. There’s no crime tonight for you to take that long,” your grandma told you from the kitchen. You entered the room being greeted by the smell of mole and ponche.

“With this food waiting for me. Yeah, sure, the city can rest a night without me, abuelita,” she giggled as you kissed her cheek. 

“I’m just going for a stretch. And maybe a flan for dinner” Your favorite part of the day was starting. So happily, you left the house. AirPods on with your favorite music blasting through them, and it felt like heaven.

Swinging from palm to buildings and watching the crowds of the traffic of LA. Until you were in the Fashion District Downtown. You stopped at your favorite rooftop to see the last minutes of the West Coast sunset. 

And it was beautiful. Orange, pink, yellow, purple, blue, and black. Like a firework evaporated in the sky. 

The air feels perfect for taking a long breath, and you feel thankful for having a good day.

“Hey..” you nearly fell from the building, but a well-known bright red web caught you in time. 

When you turned around, you had Miguel watching you.

“Miguel?. What are you doing here?” The surprise and shock were eating you alive. Maybe an emergency happened, or he exiled you from the Spider Society. Who knows?

“Just checking on you…” lately, he had been more close to you. Giving you a hand on missions, being willing to have more extended conversations, and softer pieces of advice.

“Why?” You ask, arching a brow.

“Last week, you were a little slow…” he hears you giggling, and as he walks closer, he sees you hanging your toes on the edge. He sees your hair freely fly as you laugh. Cute, he thinks.

“I was on my period. We’re good now…” he thanked, wearing the mask because his cheeks were burning. 

“Don’t be silly, Miguel. It’s… normal,” you said after he stood there quietly.

“Come, seat with me…” he obeyed, establishing some distance with you, but not too much. 

Then he removed his mask, and you confirmed that his hair always looked gorgeous. 

“Your universe is interesting,” he said finally.

“We are very fixed; little surprises us. And capitalism is leading us to ruin, but yes... it's interesting” Miguel wasn’t expecting that answer but smiled. Only because you didn’t catch it.

“You are spending too much time with Hobie,” you laughed, nodding.

“Yeah, I’ll take that…” This time, you noticed his smile. And you wanted to keep the moment a little longer.

“Can we talk?” 

“We are talking, y/n…” he let out a brief chuckle again.

“No, I know, but…I’m afraid. Of hurting someone in the process of creating a disaster with all of this being an anomaly” For weeks, you tried to avoid the thoughts of insecurity. But this was a good moment because Miguel had been training you, and he was the right and worst person to talk about this. 

“And it frustrates me that I don’t understand at all what I am….” you said, covering your face, letting all the intrusive thoughts out. Because even on a good day, anxiety could sneak in.

“Being a spider person means being afraid of many things. Keep in mind that you’ll constantly worry, but it’s part of the job. You don’t sign for it; it just hits you” his words were profound. Enough to soothe some of your panics.

“I wish I could be straight to the point like you….” Miguel was urged to touch your hand or strands of hair that brushed his forearm. But he resisted, only looking at your profile. 

“No. It’s good to be honest and worry too.” 

“And you’re something bigger than an anomaly. You’re special” Maybe his tone made everything sound softer.

“Well, I don’t feel special,” you admitted. “I feel like an accident. Not meant to be here, but nothing else to do.”

“You don’t need to feel it. I just see it…” when you turned to look at him, it was his soft look that made you realize, you were falling in love with him.

As your smile grew, Miguel completely ignored any thought of fear. He was just feeling, letting his heart warm and reciprocate your smile. 

“You have to come and have dinner with my family and me,” you blurted excitedly.

“No.” 

“SI!.”

“Por Dios. No, y/n!” He said, rolling his eyes.

“They’re not annoying or nosy, I promise,” you pleaded. He knew there was no problem because they knew you were a spider girl and the Spider Society. But… Mexican families could be nosy when a girl arrived home with a man. 

“Please, as a thank you for listening to my bullshit. Por favor, ándale. Di que sí…” he couldn’t say no. He didn’t want to reject you.

“Está bien, pues….” 

He smiled again, watching you celebrate as you started balancing between buildings. Soon he followed you, happy to feel the way he was doing.

________________________

The shock on everyone’s faces only increased the more you talked.

Pavitr, Gwen, Hobie, and Peter had their mouths open.

“And then, we went to get a flan for dinner. A kid asked for a selfie with us, and it was so silly,” you narrated.

“When we arrived home, he was so sweet. Only speaking Spanish, and he told mi abuelita I was doing great in job” Peter decided it was time to cover his mouth with one hand. Soon, everyone followed, keeping the shock.

“Dad was slightly judgmental but soon changed his mind because Miguel accepted a beer from him.” 

“Oh, and we spent hours in my room” That was enough for Peter.

“WHAT?… EXCUSE ME?”

“NO, PETER!. Jesus… we spent hours in my room because I was explaining to him some of my analysis from literature classes” The color returned to his face. Nodded understanding, and everyone else laughed.

“I can’t believe this. I simply can’t…” Pavitr confessed. “Love can come in strange ways…”

“Who’s talking of love, Pavitr?” Hobie asked playfully.

“Well…” you whispered.

“What else?” Gwen almost jumped, needing to know more. You were starting to like her more.

Once again, both of you were back on a rooftop. It was almost 2:00am.

“I-, I liked this…” Miguel managed to say. Looking down at you, trying to regain his neutral and serious tone and look. But after spending hours with you, it seemed impossible.

“Me too. You were so sweet, and thank you for being so comprehensive” Your excitement didn’t match your words, not that Miguel cared. But he realized you had jumped and grabbed both of his hands. And before you pulled away, he was caressing your knuckles.

“It was nothing…” 

“Are you coming tomorrow?” He asked.

“I think I stopped being a half-time employee some time ago…” he nodded, smiling.

“True.”

Hands were still holding. And none of you wanted to break the touch.

“Till tomorrow then….” you said, sad to break the touch but happy for everything that happened that night.

And with that, you saw Miguel opening a portal, and you left. 

You accidentally dropped a notebook when you entered your room through the window. Cursing between whispers, you hoped you didn’t wake up your family.

“Te dió un beso?” your grandma asked, opening your room door. You smiled deeply.

“No. But we hold hands for a long time, abuelita.”

“Creo que lo amo….” you admitted, very afraid.

“I think he loves you too,” she said.

“NO - FUCKING - WAY!” Gwen yelled.

“Are you sure you weren’t dreaming of drunk?”

“No, Peter. I only drink in Mexico, and I had a dream of the last episode of The haunting of Hill House I watched” he snorted as if he had heard something incredible. Gwen couldn’t stop taking time to digest the information, Pavitr too, and Hobie was… being Hobie.

“Dude looks nice with her. I heard him laugh the other day,” Hobie stated. 

“Me too. And he canceled a meeting to go and train her,” Pavitr added.

“He’s, like, the last person I imagined you would say you had a date with.” 

“It wasn’t a date….” you said.

“IT WASN’T A DATE?. Girl, he had dinner with your family, listened to your boring old books for hours, and held your hands for… five or eight minutes?” 

“Okay… maybe it unconsciously turned into a date.” They all nodded. Even Mayday seemed to nod. 

“Oh, my god… Was it a date?”

_______________________

Peter sighed as he watched you laugh with Hobie. 

“… y/n is very happy. Did you two have fun last night?” He asked Miguel once he entered his office. 

“I’m not discussing this with you,” the broad man approached to say.

Peter loved you like a sister. He wanted you to be happy and safe. 

He trusted Miguel after years of knowing each other. But he wasn’t sure if you two had a bright future. 

“I don’t want to discuss this with you either.”

“So?”

“Look, she’s like Mayday’s aunt. I want her to be happy. And you too, man. But… I want you to think… Is it correct?” Miguel stopped looking at the screens. 

“We can’t lose her. And I don’t want to see another era of pain and collapse” It hit him.

What was he thinking? Letting all of his feelings take over him. He couldn’t be in love; it wasn’t meant for him. 

Your canon was unsure, delicate. And his… was doomed.

He imagined having to see you gone, and he wasn’t ready to find out. 

He wasn’t ready to go through that pain again. 

“Just think… because maybe it’s meant to be, but-“

“No. You’re right…” Miguel accepted. 

Peter grew quiet. 

“After y/n leaves tonight. Call the others, except Hobie…” 

Miguel made a decision. Losing you was going to save both of you. Or so he thought. 

_____

Weird.

The cafeteria was quiet.

Then a piece of your suit ripped off. 

And spider-cat was absent!!! 

Then, you didn’t see Miguel the day before. When you asked Lyla, she said he was swamped with his job, so you would not make him stressed. Plus, having some space after spending the night together would be great. 

“Hey!” You called Hobie when he sat next to you on a bench. He was used to visiting you in your universe. He liked the food and how the people complained about something new daily.

“Something feels weird,” he blurted, tilting his head.

“RIGHT?. I thought I was the only one” he nodded and sighed. That was also weird; Hobie never hesitated to spit the words out.

“What?”

“Yesterday. After you left, Peter called everyone except for me. It seemed weird that just as you left, he called everyone to get a lecture from Miguel,” Another weird thing. Why you and Hobie would be excluded?

“Miguel stopped wasting his time with me, But a meeting without you?” Maybe it wasn’t anything. Perhaps a simple meeting. There had been some occasions where you had not been present.

“Do you wanna go and find why?” you asked playfully. He nodded with a gentle smile.

“Hell yeah…” Both of you left in seconds.

Spending time with Spider-punk was always fun. Hobie made you remember things like; fuck it, just do it. 

And he liked spending time with you because of your honesty. 

But for the first hour, you didn’t find anyone. Even when the headquarters of the Spider Society were big, you thought it would have been easier. 

By the evening, you find yourself eating an empanada, thinking of Miguel. Accepting you started missing him. 

“Guys!…” Gwen called you and Hobie. As she walked towards you two, Hobie said something quick.

“Don’t ask anything yet…” you nodded to him. 

“We were busy getting scolded by Miguel. But there’s a new mission we need to go to. And he wants all, let’s go….” The punk man and you exchanged looks, not buying Gwen’s words.

You got too carried away, forming possible explanations for her weird behavior. Why you hadn’t seen your friends the day before?. And why you and Hobie were excluded from the last meeting?. 

You didn’t even look at Pavitr taking Hobie away. 

As soon as you entered the room, Jessica, Peter, and Miguel were inside.

“Where’s Hobie?” He asked.

“He was right here…” Gwen mumbled, looking around, making Miguel sigh tired. 

He didn't look at you for the first minutes of the debriefing. The more he ignored your presence, the more your questions emerged.

“Everyone get ready… except for y/n,” he announced with his neutral and cold face.

“Why?”

“You’re going home.”

“WHAT?” you screamed.

At the end of the day, Miguel wasn’t ready for this. But he was doing his best, even if it meant lying to you.

“Your canon is changing, constantly glitching. We can’t risk anything happening. I’m sending you home…” he explained like nothing.

“No, please. You have to stop seeing me as a danger. Look at me as your talisman, like a ghost in the multiverses. If it was something bad, it would’ve happened already” he kept looking straight at the doors, not even moving.

It hurt you that he was still unsure of you, especially after everything he said in your home.

“It’s for the best.”

“Can we talk… In private?” You whispered, taking his forearm. He slowly moved away, making you feel the pain grow.

“There’s nothing to talk about”

“Oh really?. I think we do. What about the other day?”

“It was. All this time, it was. It wasn’t a coincidence that you appeared after someone tried opening portals in your earth,” you gasped in shock.

“I did it for the Spider Society. I needed to know you were not a threat.”

“You said I was special…” he managed to hear you whisper. And it was tearing him.

“You are. But a potential danger too. Which is why I’m sending you home…” you shake your head, fighting the tears rapidly forming in your eyes.

“All of you knew about this?” You asked, looking at Peter, Gwen, and Jessica. 

The pregnant woman bowed her head while Gwen looked like she wanted to say something but couldn’t.

“We do this because we care for and want to protect you…” 

“Really? This is not what friends do. All you do is lie and lie to me!” you said with a broken voice.

“I’m sorry,” Miguel admitted looking down.

“GOD, STOP LYING” you yelled. 

“Tell me I meant nothing to you. Or admit you might be scared of the possibility of falling in love with me….”

“You meant nothing to me. It was all a lie” he broke you. You swore you heard your heart decreasing its heartbeats. 

“For one minute, I thought you… loved me back” As he stood there quietly, you started crying. 

To everyone’s shock, it was the first time they saw you crying. Gwen tried to reach you, but you stepped back, moving away from all of them.

At the same time, Pavitr and Hobie entered the room.

“Something weird happened. You might want to see this, boss,” Pavitr announced. 

“It was dope….” Hobie admitted leaning on the door frame. But stood quiet after watching you crying.

The moment turned uneasy, debating whether to go or stay with you.

“Please, let’s go, and then we’ll talk with tranquility about this,” Peter told you. Giving a look that he wasn’t happy with seeing you cry. 

Slowly, you followed them. Ignoring Miguel’s look. 

Then you thought, What was the point of following them? If they would send you home after that?.

Anger wasn’t a good feeling, but it was blinding you. All the fantastic facade they sold you of good friends. The months Miguel lied to you. He could have done it differently. But he even dared to agree to have dinner with your family. 

He held your hands and made you believe there was a chance. 

So you stopped following them and turned to the lower plant of the building.

___________

Your web was tiny, like a baby’s. It glitched a lot, but when Miguel entered with the others, he noticed the glitch was even more aggressive than ever. 

There were only two canon moments; you getting bit and joining the Spider Society. But a new one was forming. And from the shiny dot, a new line grew.

“What the hell?” Peter asked in disbelief.

The line started moving until it was connected to another: Miguel’s.

And from that connection, a new canon event was officially established.

You and Miguel were together. Dramatically holding hands and facing each other.

“Holy sh-” Gwen almost said but couldn’t finish the sentence. 

“Does this mean…” Jessica started.

“She’s part of your canon,” Peter confirmed.

Miguel was in shock; his eyes remained on what the model displayed. You were really meant for him. He hadn’t need to worry about it ending in disaster. Still, it didn’t soothe him.

“Uh-boss? Our pretty little y/n started a countdown to return home and temporarily block the entrance to her earth,” Lyla announced, appearing beside Miguel. He turned to look at her, worried. 

“What?”

“I tried stopping her, but I believe she’s growing her cosmic powers?” the day couldn’t get more complicated for Spider-Man 2099.

“Cosmic powers?” Peter asked, running when Miguel started heading towards the exit.

Lyla, crossed her arms looking at everyone starting running. She couldn’t admit it to anyone. That if your issue wasn’t fixed, something darker could happen. The AI couldn’t throw salt in Miguel’s wound.

“Jessica, send help. Lyla, stop her,” he demanded. Jessica nodded, and Lyla disappeared.

“There’s no spider with cosmic powers. But y/n was a bit between universes. So maybe she has some of them or….” 

“Peter shut up!. I just can’t lose her!” If you were Miguel’s destiny, he would do things right. And he regretted setting up all of the secret meetings and lies. 

He rushed to get to you faster than anyone. He wasn’t even sure the blocking earth thing worked. 

Maybe he was exaggerating, but he was willing to set the alarms so everyone would try to stop him. 

If he had waited a day, none of this would’ve happened. But he had understood once that things happened for a reason; canon. 

So as fast as he was running, something inside told him it was already late.

Peter and Gwen followed close to him, ready to find you prepared to leave. 

The panic finally settled when they entered the dark room, and you were already behind the colorful barrier. 

“NO!. Please, y/n” You turned to hear Miguel’s voice calling you. 

Your look was empty, but the anger was there. He kept calling for you, but you didn’t say a word. 

All of you wanted was to leave. Sleep and forget you were a spider girl. Ease the pain of your broken heart. And accept that no matter if you were the only variant of yourself in all the universes, you were meant to end up without love. 

Because when he had you face to face, you were gone. 

Confused, you appeared on a random street in Downtown LA. Your suit was ripped, your hair was a mess, and the tears didn’t seem to stop. A wave of cold air hit you, making you shiver and hug yourself. 

Feeling broken and in shock, you found yourself stepping on a broken glass bottle. Your left foot instantly started bleeding, making you fall to your knees.

That’s when you no longer held the tears; you just let all the sobs take over. 

You shouldn’t have accepted to join the Spider Society; you shouldn’t have pushed your crush for Miguel. 

I hate this. I hate this. God, I hate this…

With no more strength, you stood up. And tottering, you started walking towards home. 

It was okay; it would be okay. 

________________________

Cringe in general? Maybe… part two?

#miguel o'hara #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o’hara angst #spiderman 2099 #atsv #peter b parker #miguel o’hara imagine #accross the spiderverse #miguel o’hara

[elyvorg]

Kieran Part Bonus: I AM SO PROUD OF MY BOY

And now for my really actually final analysis post about Kieran, covering both the epilogue and also his scenes in the League Club room once you’ve finished that. Somehow both of these relatively short pieces of content still managed to be packed with delightful nuance showcasing both how Kieran’s still struggling with his issues and yet also how much he’s grown since his main arc. They are absolutely lovely and fill me with so many warm happy feelings about my boy.

Honestly, it’s remarkable, not just from a Pokémon-writing perspective but as a piece of fiction in general, to have this kind of satisfying follow-up for a character arc. Usually once a character’s arc reaches a resolution, their story just ends there, and we don’t get to see more of how they’re processing what they’ve been through and learning to grow further in the aftermath. So it’s a really wonderful breath of fresh air to get to see something like that for once here with Kieran! The Pokémon writers absolutely did not have to make the epilogue and postgame content focused on showcasing this, and yet they did. I am, once again, pleasantly boggled by how much they cared about doing Kieran’s story justice. Just, wowzers, man. There really is no more appropriate word for my amazement than that.

(This is an epilogue, if you will, to my previous two analysis posts discussing Kieran’s character arc in The Teal Mask and The Indigo Disk! Reading those before this is probably recommended.)

Before even getting into things that are strictly from the epilogue itself, can I just say: I really love that Kieran took a mental health break from Blueberry Academy to give him some time to process things? (Okay, the game only calls it a “break”, but let’s be real, it is for his mental health, and this is Good.) It just makes me very happy that the writing acknowledged that he’d probably need something like that after what he’s been through instead of going straight back to business as normal at school – and in an in-story sense, it’s lovely that Kieran realised he needed this and didn’t try and force himself to just keep going as if nothing had happened. He’s starting to learn to take care of himself and not push himself way too hard!

Making new friends

The first lovely sign of Kieran’s growth that we see in the epilogue is that, not only does he want to catch up with you, he also wants to meet your friends from Paldea! He must have spent some time during his break thinking about the fact that you mentioned you had friends from there.

And the thing is, with Kieran’s insecurities, it would have been so easy for him to slip into a mindset of “your friends are probably way cooler than me, why would you need me”. But instead of letting himself get caught up in that jealousy spiral again, he fought against it and did the healthy thing of asking to meet them himself. Hopefully he can become friends with them too and then he’ll have nothing to feel jealous about! He outright says when he meets them, “Any friend of [yours] is a friend of mine!” Look at him go. (Arven should take notes on how not to act insecure about one’s best friend having other friends, because damn, Kieran’s managing to be more well-adjusted than him now.)

All this is also just a sign that Kieran’s hoping to try and make more friends in general. He’s such an introvert that he must have figured that’d be easier for him to do with people for whom he has a mutual friend to get to know them through. Plus, if they’re your friends, then he already has a guarantee that they’ll be good and nice people. Way more manageable for him than trying to approach complete randos.

And really, it’s such a huge remarkable thing for Kieran that he is trying to make friends now. Friends, plural! This is the kid who used to be so lonely and shunned by others that his big dream was to one day be like the ogre who, according to him, doesn’t care that it’s all alone. And maybe then, if he managed that, he’d be able to befriend the ogre – just that one other person who is also alone and outcast. It never even crossed his mind to try and imagine that one day he could be confident and worthy enough to just… have some human friends. That wasn’t even an option in his head – it was “learn to not care that he’s alone” or nothing.

And yet look at Kieran now, actively reaching out to try and make new friends! I am so proud of him.

Learning to ask for help

Soon after you meet up with Kieran, it becomes apparent that something is Very Wrong with his sister. According to Kieran’s account, it was shortly after he sent you the letter that Carmine became possessed, so it’s not that the letter was secretly a call for help in which he couldn’t bring himself to admit the actual problem.

And even now that you’re here… Kieran wasn’t going to tell you about this problem at all until Carmine happened to wander up and start mochi-dancing in front of you. He tries to play the whole thing off like it’s totally normal and she’s definitely just… excited to see you???, even though he has to know that doesn’t make any sense at all. On some level this is just because it’s really scary to admit to himself that something is very wrong and he doesn’t have a clue how to fix it. But it’s also because… he still doesn’t feel like he has the right to ask you and your friends for help.

This is one of the ways in which Kieran’s issues and low sense of self-worth from before are still lingering and have not just been magically, instantly fixed. While he may be making a conscious effort to fight through his insecurities to try and make more friends, he hasn’t started consciously tackling everything that was holding him back just yet. It seems like he imagines that asking your friends for help, these people he’s only just met, would just make him a burden on them and maybe spoil any chance he had of actually becoming their friend himself. (Although, even if you’d come to visit him alone, I suspect he’d still struggle to ask even just you for help, simply due to his old ingrained mindset that he’s not worthy enough to deserve it.)

Happily for Kieran, your friends are all good people who instantly unthinkingly offer to help without him even needing to ask them! Kieran’s sheer surprise and gratitude when this happens is so telling about his insecurities for why he didn’t feel he could ask, but it’s also lovely to see him starting to realise that his instinctive way of thinking about this is mistaken. Welcome to having friends, Kieran, this is how it works actually! Most people are good and will be happy to help out a friend in need! It’s okay to need help sometimes!

There’s another very innocuous line that I find interestingly telling about Kieran’s mindset regarding this. When you’re all at the community centre wanting to use the TV, Kieran laments that it’s stuck playing the tourism ad because the caretaker hid the remote, so Arven immediately suggests you all look for it. And Kieran reacts, in surprise, “Why didn’t I think of that?” It reads as largely rhetorical, but… it’s a good question.

Why didn’t Kieran think of just trying to find the remote? Because he’s spent so long stuck in a mindset where, if things are bad for him, it’s just what he deserves for being weak and there’s nothing he can do about it. His response to his problems during the main storyline was to completely separately fixate on making himself Stronger so that, in theory, problems would just stop happening to him entirely. It never occurred to him to try and just face and deal with his problems directly – at least not until the climactic battle with Terapagos, which was the first time he ever found the courage to take such an approach – so the notion to do so still isn’t quite habitual in his mind just yet.

Hopefully Kieran asking why he didn’t think of that wasn’t quite so rhetorical, and he was reflecting on it himself a little when he said it. He ought to realise that actually, taking action to directly solve his problems is a good thing and something he should strive to do more! He has already begun to do so in some ways by reaching out in an attempt to make more friends, at least.

Solving the problem

Kieran sure does get a lot more practice at Directly Solving Problems thanks to the events that go on to occur that night, doesn’t he. I love that the epilogue’s plot, while ostensibly just there to give players an opportunity to catch Pecharunt, is also a narrative that exists to let Kieran get to be a hero alongside you.

It’s somewhat low key, but Kieran definitely gets pretty freaked out about everything that’s happening. Which is really perfectly reasonable – though the effects of the possession are incredibly silly, it’s still got to be genuinely frightening to see people he knows getting controlled against their will by some unknown force, especially when this includes his own family. (One detail I love is that the game uses that lack of a highlight in his eyes during certain lines to communicate the fear he's feeling and trying not-so-successfully to hide; it’s a small thing, but it works so well.)

Once you’ve fought off his possessed grandparents, Kieran starts to panic, convinced it’s only a matter of time before it gets him (even though the evidence of how exactly the possession occurs is right there if he’d just stop to think about it for a moment). On some level, he must still have this sense that, if it can get all these people he looks up to, surely it’ll get him too who’s so much weaker than them. His inferiority complex is still there and affecting him, especially in this stressful situation.

Good thing Kieran has you by his side, the strongest coolest friend ever whom he knows he can rely on! If you hadn’t been there to reassure him and snap him out of it, he really might have lost himself to his panic. Or he might have just not even tried to battle the possessed people and do something about all of this in the first place – see the earlier point about how him facing problems directly is still not instinctive to him. He’s able to do so here, but a lot of that is probably thanks to being able to follow your lead. Still, this is bound to help him get better at doing so on his own in future!

Kieran’s also still a bit too liable to feel like things are his fault even when they really aren’t. He blames himself for not warning Arven and Penny about the mochi in time, even though he was literally about to do so when Pecharunt showed up and sniped mochi directly into their mouths. That can’t be called Kieran’s fault at all! He tried! (And, hey, it’s not like you made any attempt to warn them either.) But he still feels responsible for it anyway.

And he’s also still rather defeatist when it comes to facing Strong Opponents in battle. Kieran couldn’t defeat Nemona earlier in the day, so when it comes down to facing off against her in order to get to Pecharunt, he just feels like he can’t do it, end of. Really, that’s not necessarily the case – since this is an emergency and not a friendly battle for sport, there’s no reason you have to beat Nemona in a fair 6-on-6. Anything to get past her will do; the two of you could have taken her on in a 12-on-6 double battle, perhaps! Kieran did not need to momentarily feel useless in this situation, but he did, because not being able to win against someone still equates in his mind to being No Good At All. Kieran, nooo.

Happily, the narrative provides Kieran with something else to do with himself while you fight Nemona so that he is very decidedly not useless in the slightest – fighting off the entire town’s worth of people behind you??? That is equally as necessary as taking down Nemona, something without which you’d never have managed to get to Pecharunt, and it must take some incredible battling skill to be able to hold off that many opponents at once. Like, dang, Kieran. I really hope he’s able to reflect on this in the aftermath and realise how incredibly strong and cool that was of him, because it was.

(He was holding his own one-against-many, just like he always admired Ogerpon for doing!)

Kieran’s fear and pessimism also show through just a tiny bit as you’re fighting Pecharunt at the end, when he reacts to the fact that you were able to damage it. Apparently he was afraid that this thing would be completely invulnerable and it just wouldn’t be possible for even someone as amazing as you to beat it and stop the curse. Yikes, that must have been a scary thought. But still, it all worked out in the end! Kieran’s learning that even when things are scary and feel overwhelming, by facing up to them and doing his best, it’ll usually turn out okay! Especially because he’s not alone and has friends by his side to support him now.

And, hey, one way or another, it seems like the events of the epilogue did help give Kieran that last little push he needed to decide to go back to Blueberry Academy! I imagine he was already thinking about doing so – he is actually a very stubborn and determined person at his core, so I don’t think he could ever have been considering just giving up on it – but all of this probably helped give him the confidence to make that leap. The thought of apologising to everyone for how he acted must still be incredibly daunting – but, he’s begun to realise that he can face scary things!

His old Kitakami team

During the epilogue’s battles, I was absolutely delighted to see Kieran send out Poliwrath, one of the Pokémon he used in Teal Mask but not in Indigo Disk – because this is proof that he’s been reconnecting with the Pokémon friends he left behind back then! As it turns out, the rest of his team for these multi battles is the same as his Champion team, with only the Polis switched, but even so, Poliwrath’s presence is enough to be a promising sign for all of his old Pokémon friends.

And this gets further confirmed by his dialogue with Arven in the clubroom! Arven asks Kieran which of his Pokémon he’s closest to, and he mentions his Hydrapple (which has been with him since it was an Applin), his Poliwrath and Politoed, his Yanmega, and his Furret! This accounts for all of the Pokémon Kieran had in his Teal Mask battles up to the third one, after which he started to fixate hard on getting stronger to prove himself to you, so these are likely all of the Pokémon that were friends of his from the start. And he still considers them friends now, which means he reconnected with them all and apologised as necessary for any leaving them behind/thinking they were weak/etc that he might have done! Yes good, Justice For Furret was had, I could not be happier.

(Okay, we never saw the second Poli back then, but the way he talks about both Polis together suggests they’re a pair, so I imagine they were both his friends back then, too. He also never used Applin against you before evolving it into Dipplin – which is fair, Applin is very not good in battles – so the lack of us seeing another Poliwag/whirl is probably because he felt he needed to use a diverse team that didn’t have two of the same species. He doesn’t have to battle with all of his Pokémon for them to still be his friends, after all! He still doesn’t battle with most of them now in the clubroom battles either, which use his same Champion team, but that doesn’t stop them from being his precious pals!)

(On the other hand, since there is no sign nor mention of them in the postgame, I suspect that, like Cramorant before them, his Gliscor, Shiftry and Probopass from the final Kitakami battle got released. Kieran would have only had them for like a day or two during the events of Teal Mask, since he only caught them after he fixated on getting stronger, so I doubt he’d grown very attached to them during that time. Still, that’s okay, because hey, he did make them stronger, which is probably all they ever expected from him when they joined his team.)

Nemona is Good

One extremely delightful aspect of the epilogue and beyond is Kieran’s interactions with Nemona. It turns out that her outlook on battling is exactly the kind of thing Kieran needed to help regain a healthier view on it himself!

His feelings about his own battling skills are still very all-or-nothing at the beginning of the epilogue. When Nemona excitedly declares that she’s heard he’s really good at battling, Kieran’s pretty dismissive of that idea. He couldn’t beat you, therefore that means he’s Not Good At It, right? (Kieran, no.) He also says that Nemona “destroyed” him once they’ve battled – but based on the fact that she has nothing but praise for how good he is, I very strongly suspect that he actually gave her a really tough fight, and he only framed it that negatively because losing at all still makes his inferiority complex blow things way out of proportion.

Happily, delightfully, Nemona tells Kieran exactly what he has always needed to hear this whole time, which is that it shouldn’t matter whether you win or lose, because battles are fun either way! And with a moment to reflect on that, he agrees… yeah, they are, he had a lot of fun!

We’d heard from Drayton that Kieran was always a kid who’d deeply enjoyed battling, from the very beginning. But it seems that somewhere along the way he’d stopped loving it so much, at least when he’s the one battling - probably because he’d often lose, which would trigger his inferiority complex and make him feel bad. We only saw a small glimpse of his passion for battling ourselves at the beginning of Teal Mask, mostly when he watched you battle his sister, and a little bit in his own early battles with you, but he still felt bad over losing, poor kid.

But with Nemona’s help, Kieran’s been able to remember just how much he always loved battling and can just enjoy himself with it again! In your clubroom battles with him, he has a line just before he Terastallises where he says “these feelings never change” – and though he doesn’t specify what feelings he’s talking about, the one thing about Kieran that has never changed this entire time, even if he sort of lost sight of it for a while along the way, is the thrill he gets from battling! He also says in another line that he’s “having a blast” – which is phrasing that Nemona uses that Kieran never has before, so apparently he picked that up from her? Aww. I am so glad he could meet her; she is exactly the breath of battle-loving fresh air he always needed.

Kieran’s clubroom conversation with Nemona is also very good and helps him let go of his all-or-nothing mindset a little more. Nemona praises him for how quickly he climbed the ranks of the BB League, which he insists is meaningless because he pushed himself unhealthily hard and then still couldn’t beat you in the end. But Nemona helps him reframe it and think of it as: he was incredibly dedicated, and it must mean he really loves Pokémon and battling, which is true! This has to help Kieran view his training arc in a more positive light instead of focusing on the negative aspects like his toxic obsession and lack of self-care. Hopefully if/when he starts training hard again, he’ll be able to feel better about it and not associate it with all the bad things, thanks to Nemona! (But also, Kieran, please remember to not neglect self-care again, that was bad. I imagine he has indeed got the message about that, since the way he talks about that aspect in this conversation seems tinged with regret.)

Carmine is Trying

Another thing we see in the epilogue – admittedly only a small glimpse near the end, but it’s something – is that Kieran’s relationship with his sister seems to have gotten a little bit healthier? They each make equal-opportunity Sibling Banter jabs at each other, and Kieran doesn’t slump and shrink and look so defeated when she bites back against one of his. There’s probably still some ways to go here on their dynamic becoming completely truly healthy, but it’s definitely progress from before, which is good to see.

I think Carmine really must have reflected on her role in Kieran’s breakdown and is trying in her own fumbling awkward way to do better by him now. A delightful sign of this is one of her scenes in the clubroom, in which she resolves to be less protective of Kieran, even if it’ll make her lonelier without him around as much. That’s exactly what she needs to do! After all, this whole thing started because Carmine couldn’t bear to let her brother endure even the tiniest amount of badfeels that would have come from learning he happened to miss out on meeting the ogre. Carmine has realised on some level that she needs to have more faith in Kieran and his ability to endure and get through stuff on his own, rather than trying too hard to protect him from everything ever, which just results in coddling him and stifling his possibility for growth. She still does want to look out for him from a distance and be able to help if he really does need it, but she’s trying not to overdo it any more. Yes good, I am proud of her too.

Reconciling with his schoolmates

I said already in the Indigo Disk post that it’s incredibly brave of Kieran to resolve to apologise to everyone he hurt and make amends, and this is still true. That has to have been so scary, but he went and did it anyway! It seems he even apologised to the people who cared about him, such as his sister and Amarys, for worrying them with his behaviour – which also means he has managed to comprehend the fact that people cared about him, even back then when he was at his most unlikeable.

And by the sounds of what he says in his clubroom scenes, most people took his apologies well and are talking to him like normal now, which has to have been such a relief. It means a lot that Kieran wasn’t expecting anything of the sort and apologised anyway despite expecting backlash, simply because it was the right thing to do – but hey, most people are nice and can probably tell he was decidedly Not Himself during that time and are willing to put the past behind them! Social interaction isn’t quite as scary as he’d used to think, it turns out!

Even then, some things are still a bit weird, and with how far-reaching his impact as Champion was, Kieran’s bound to keep having to deal with this for a while. There must keep being more people he was a jerk to that he still hasn’t apologised to yet, people being intimidated by him because they don’t realise he’s changed, constant reminders of some of the hurtful things he said and did back then. Making amends is going to be a pretty long-term thing, but Kieran is putting in the effort to do so all the same, because it’s the right thing to do, and he is so brave.

Someone who is making this harder than it needs to be is Drayton, because of freaking course he is. He still insists on rubbing in the “ex-Champ” thing, even though Kieran has made it clear he does not appreciate being called that (of course, he no longer minds that he’s not Champion any more, but the fact that Drayton insists on constantly reminding him of his past self has to sting). On the one hand, Drayton is still concerned about Kieran in his own way, because he does effectively ask if Kieran’s eating better meals now, but on the other hand their entire clubroom interaction features him deliberately dodging Kieran’s genuine attempts to just engage with him in an effort to make amends, and, geez. This is exactly what he wanted from Kieran all along, and yet he is somehow still not satisfied. Seriously, Drayton.

At least Drayton is the only one of the Elite Four to be like this, and the others seem to be on good terms with Kieran now! Look at Lacey insisting that the past is in the past when Kieran acts confused that she’d want to help him after he was such a jerk to her. (Someone needs to take notes there, Drayton.) And it seems like Kieran’s got another good friend in Crispin, who’s in the same class as him! Our boy is making so many new friends and it is wonderful.

Of course, his insecurities are still around, and he’s still a little too liable to assume he’s doing something Wrong in social situations, as we see in a couple of his clubroom interactions. That one with Arven about his Pokémon is an example, as Arven phrased things as if he expected Kieran to have just one single closest Pokémon buddy, and Kieran seemed to feel bad that he actually had multiple candidates and couldn’t pick – but happily, Arven reassured him that it’s cool to not be able to choose, too! And in Kieran’s interaction with Crispin, he reflexively apologises for not having watched the latest episode of a show, but Crispin calls him out on the apology, and Kieran is able to question himself as to why he apologised and conclude that he didn’t need to, because it’s not like Crispin’s going to mind.

He is learning! He does not need to feel like he has to perfectly match his conversation partner’s expectations in order to be their friend! Kieran’s approach to his own issues has become so healthy and filled with self-reflection and growth, and I am so proud of him.

Friendship with you

Kieran is also able to be a whole lot healthier about his friendship with you, now that you’re properly friends again after everything! Possibly my favourite completely innocuous line in the epilogue is when he casually mentions that you and he became friends during the school trip to Kitakami. This is actually huge, because Kieran had spent so long utterly convinced that you couldn’t possibly have meant it when you called him a friend back then, not after the lie and all of his issues about being too weak to deserve it. But now, he’s been able to reflect on that and realise… of course you meant it. Of course you always wanted to be his friend, right from the very beginning! It wasn’t on purpose of you that he got left out of meeting Ogerpon at all, because you’re a good person and you wouldn’t do something like that, and he never actually deserved that after all.

(Perhaps sometime during his break, he had a proper talk with his sister about what happened and why she lied, and Carmine finally got to fully express that you and she never meant to hurt him and shun him with that.)

Kieran is still not over his idolisation of you, mind you. He reacts to you being the one to find the TV remote of all completely mundane things with “Wowzers! ‘Course you found it first!” – which, really isn’t a wowzers or an of course? Your magical protagonist powers do not and should not extend to this, and yet they still do in Kieran’s head. But even though he still views you this way, Kieran is so much healthier about it now. He’s no longer bitter and jealous and beating himself up for not being as perfect as he thinks you are, since nobody is (not even you, not really) – instead, he’s just so incredibly thrilled that he actually gets to be friends with someone so cool!

I really love that the devs went and gave Kieran a new losing animation for his clubroom battles, too. His previous ones always had him being varying levels of upset about losing, but not any more! He just stares in wide-eyed awe at your amazingness, and then breaks into a big smile and thanks you for the battle, because he still had great fun even though he lost! And he’s able to freely admit that he looks up to you because you’re so strong, or, in an optional line in the epilogue, he admits that he’s jealous that your friends are all really good people. He still has those feelings, but he’s able to healthily express them now without letting them twist him into something harmful.

It seems like he’s still a little insecure about if he deserves to be friends with you, though, based on a few small things. When he asks you for a trade in the clubroom, he appears hesitant to ask, as if he’s not sure he has the right to, and if you say no – even though there’s every chance this is just because you want some time to decide on an appropriately special Pokémon to give him – he slumps, probably having had his sensitivity to rejection triggered. And even once you’ve traded, he can later ask if you’re absolutely sure he can really keep the Pokémon you traded him, because he can’t quite believe he could get to have such a cool gift from you of all people. Aww, Kieran. Hopefully his hypothetical future interactions with you will help squash this insecurity of his further, because he deserves to feel comfortable in his friendship with his best friend!!!

Ogerpon

Another seemingly-innocuous but extremely good line in the clubroom is that Kieran can ask you if Ogerpon’s doing well and say that he thinks she’ll be pretty happy with you. He says this in a completely casual way, with no hint of bitterness – which tells us that he’s no longer jealous that you caught Ogerpon! It makes sense that he wouldn’t be, because he doesn’t need her acknowledgement any more like he used to think he did in order to feel worth something. He’s already got acknowledgement and self-worth and happiness now for so many other reasons, after all! So he can just be selflessly happy for Ogerpon that she’s found a trainer she can feel safe and happy with too, without being irrationally preoccupied over what she thinks of him.

It is interesting to see in this dialogue that Kieran initially calls her “the ogre” before correcting himself to “Ogerpon” – apparently, he’s only quite recently made an effort to shift what he calls her in his head. It’s true that in his reaction to her in the Champion battle, he did indeed just call her “the ogre”. It’d make sense that he didn’t actually work to shift his mental idea of what to call her during his Indigo Disk arc, despite knowing her species name, because the name “Ogerpon” likely brought back too many painful reminders of everything that happened in Kitakami. It was probably easier for him to just stick with “the ogre” and try to forget anything had changed. But he’s okay with what happened now!

And maybe Kieran trying to make a habit of using her name now is a sign that he’s started to realise that Ogerpon is her own individual who’s not quite the same as the mental image he always had of what “the ogre” was like? Maybe. It’s hard to be sure. Unfortunately the epilogue/postgame can’t do much with Ogerpon because it’s always optional for her to be on your team or even in your game at all (since you could in theory have released her or traded her away). But we can at least hypothetically imagine that in Kieran’s continued interactions with you, he’ll get the chance to hang out with Ogerpon a little and come to understand her better. It certainly seems now that he’d be able to hang out with both you and her without feeling uncomfortably jealous, which is a good start! (And Terapagos is on the list of ‘people’ he owes an apology to, so let’s imagine he gets a chance to do that, too.)

Moving forward

The “climax”, such as there is one, of Kieran’s mini-arc of scenes in the clubroom is him excitedly telling you that he’s had the BB League drop him from their rankings. Although your character seems a little bewildered by it (they are still a bit of a social dumbass), this is in fact an extremely good thing for Kieran! He’s taking a step back from the competitive side of things for the sake of his mental health, so that he can untangle himself from the toxically-obsessive mindset that he was in back when he was only focused on winning! Look at Kieran doing all this good self-reflection and self-care, it is so lovely to see. He doesn’t even seem to view this as any sign of him failing, either – he’s just comfortably acknowledging that he needs to do this for now for his own sake and there’s no shame in that.

Kieran seems pretty sure that he is going to want to get back into competing once he’s cleared his head a bit, but he’s already so much more casual and healthy about it! He says he’s going to shoot for the Champion title again, and even if you respond with a friendly taunt of “You still won’t beat me!”, he takes it so well. He’s genuinely okay now with the thought that he might never quite be good enough to beat you – he just wants to have fun trying. Look at how far he’s come!

In the meantime, while he sorts his head out, he just wants to spend time with his Pokémon (who mean a lot to him as far more than just sources of battling strength!) and his human friends (whom he has so many of now???) and figure out what he really wants to do with himself from here. Good for him!

Kieran’s still just a kid, and seeing him already learn how to grow from his mistakes and face up to his lingering issues and be just so emotionally healthy about things now is such a promising sign for wherever he’s going to end up in future. I love that the epilogue and these postgame clubroom scenes put so much effort into showing us this about Kieran now, reassuring us that he really is going to be okay. I truly could not be more proud of or happy for my boy.

#pokemon #pokemon sv #pokemon scarlet and violet #the hidden treasure of area zero #mochi mayhem #pokemon kieran #kieran pokemon #trainer kieran #rival kieran #character analysis #ramble #friends

[mypoisonedvine]

OMG OMG TWO OF MY FAVORITE WRITERS TOGETHER I CANT BREATHE!!! can i please req a dark eddie x shy innocent girlfriend reader who always keeps to herself and doesn’t talk to anyone (except eddie ofc) bc she has a stutter and has been bullied by jason but she doesn’t tell eddie because she’s afraid of what he’ll do but at lunch when she’s with him and his friends talking jason makes fun of her even making her cry and eddie just loses it! I LOVE YOU!!! srry for rambling😭😍🥰

WE'RE ALSO VERY EXCITED THAT WE'RE TOGETHER and we also can't breathe cause we keep laughing at stupid tiktoks lmaooo

just a heads up, I know you said dark eddie in the fic but it wasn't giving dark to me so I wrote it more traditional, I hope you don't mind. I was gonna have bex do this one but we realized it's a lot like their fic mighty protector so I decided to try my hand at it instead!

warnings: bullying, fluff, jason sucks

When you first transferred here, everyone just thought you were silent; that was what you wanted, actually, but it never lasted long enough. It was only a couple of weeks before you had to say something in front of them, and the longer you waited to speak, the more anxious you were to finally break the silence-- and anxiety was what made your stammer show up in the first place.

In those weeks of silence, Eddie had found a way to fall for you without getting to talk to you at all. Amazingly, even after you humiliated yourself in front of the entire English class and became the laughingstock of Hawkins High, he still asked you out; you rejected him the first time, actually, convinced it was a joke. Then, when you figured out it wasn't a joke, you rejected him again because you were too nervous to say yes.

Technically, you never said yes to that first date... he showed up at your house, with flowers and a blanket and a packed picnic basket, and you joined him on your own front lawn. And yes, he made you stammer-- and blush, and laugh. From that day on, you had a permanent seat at the Hellfire table at lunch, with Eddie's arm draped over your shoulders.

Of course, not every day could be perfection. There was still Jason.

"Hey, freaks," Jason greeted you all as he walked by, looking incredibly proud of that incredibly low-hanging fruit.

"Keep moving, shitstain," Dustin called back with a roll of his eyes.

"That's rich coming from you, freshman-- did you just get out of diapers or what?" Jason retorted.

For some reason, that really pissed you off, probably because you could remember being new here too. You knew you shouldn't say anything-- you hardly ever did, knowing what would happen if you opened your mouth-- but for once you wanted to speak up for something you cared about. Or, someone. You put all your concentration into the words on your tongue, clenching your fists and praying to any god that would listen to just. not. stutter.

"B-b-back off!" you blurted out. The whole table, and Jason's crew of jocks, went silent. Then, they started laughing.

Your face heated up and your eyes watered as you looked down. "Nice one, d-d-d-d-dork!" Jason imitated with a loud cackle. Dustin and Mike looked guilty, like it was somehow their fault; Eddie started to get up out of his seat at the table, but you squeezed his shoulder.

"D-don't," you whispered to Eddie. "He's j-j-just trying t-to get you in t-trouble. L...Lll--"

You were gonna say 'leave him alone', but 'L's were the hardest. You didn't stammer on this, specifically, but you got... stuck. And you hated it most of all, it made you feel like a complete lllllloser.

"Oh, look-- I bet she's whispering sweet nothings in his ear," Jason noticed you talking to your boyfriend, putting on a mocking impression with a high-pitched voice as he continued: "D-d-d-do me, Munson!"

A hand on his shoulder wasn't nearly enough to stop Eddie after that; he all but leapt out of his seat and pounced on Jason, taking him to the ground.

He got a few hits in, but it was only a few seconds before Jason's douche army was all over him; honestly, they would've probably really hurt him if there hadn't been teachers nearby to break it up.

The other thing about teachers being nearby, though, is that they saw Eddie technically 'start it.' Of course, they'd never give detention to a basketball star like Carver, and they were always looking for excuses to bust the stoner-slash-super-senior.

You tried to sweeten the deal, though, as repayment for him getting himself detention to defend your honor: you wrote him a note that you paid another delinquent to smuggle in to him.

Hey Ed,

I know I should say this to you in person, but I wanted it to be perfect, no stutters.

I love you.

~

Your heart was already racing as you waited for him to be released from detention; when you saw him burst through the front doors and come bounding towards you, you stood up from where you'd been sitting on the steps outside.

"My-- my poor b-boyfriend," you cooed as he wrapped you in a bear hug and kissed the top of your head.

"Didn't miss me too much while I was incarcerated, did you?" he smirked.

"D-d-desperately," you replied. "D-did you... get my note?"

He smiled. "Yeah."

You pouted a little, getting nervous. "D-do you have... anything to... say t-to it? I m-mean, what I said..."

"I won't respond to what you said until you say it," he insisted.

"Eddie!" you whined.

"C'mon, princess, loud and proud," he demanded.

"B-but I wanted it to be p-p-perfect!" you complained, your heart racing as you just knew you would mess it up if you tried to say it right to his face like this. Shutting your eyes, you took a deep breath; praying didn't work last time, so you just said it a thousand times in your head like you wanted it to come out: I love you Eddie, I love you Eddie, I love you-- "I llllllove you, Eddie."

You cringed as you heard your impediment come through, but then you softened when you felt Eddie's lips press to yours. Smiling into it, you wrapped your arms around his neck and embraced him. "Sounded perfect to me, princess," he whispered. "I love you, too."

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson fic #bex and jd's sleepover

[bao3bei4]

ON THE TSHIRT METHOD TO WRITING ESSAYS IN YOUR OWN TIME: 

i have had a couple people mention to me that they would like to write essays too, but they are a little out of practice. so i thought i should gather some scattered thoughts into one place. this is not a systematic guide. i am young and inexperienced and still working out things for myself, but this is my basic process and some things that have helped me, summarized. 

my biggest single piece of advice is to write with your proverbial pussy. you are not writing for a grade so don't act like it. forget rigor, forget academic style, etc. read what you're interested in, and write following up on the threads that you're interested in. don’t sweat the details. just do you.

if you still need more advice..... here’s a long winded post. 

step zero: if you have no clue what you want to say yet 

read. and read a lot.

but be realistic. be kind to yourself. your attention is a precious resource, and it is getting eaten up by shit out of your control all the time. if you’ve had a busy day, you may still have the brain power left to read. i almost never do. lol. so make sure to carve out time on a day off, if possible. otherwise you might end up completely fried, reading the same sentence over and over, and ending up scrolling on your phone LMAO. <-- painful lesson also to this end, if you haven’t picked up a denser book in a while, start with shorter articles, especially ones written more recently. if your attention wanders, try getting a physical book instead. the most important thing is just starting things you’ll actually read.  i’ve seen a lot of people (and been that person) who was like. “oh i’m going to start with THE canonical text in a subject i’m interested in” which makes sense right? but that book is inevitably long and dense and convoluted and boring. you can come back to it later. this shouldn’t feel like a chore! 

genuinely this is the most helpful thing you can do is just. read anything. it may be difficult at first (or always), but it is still the easiest way to engage with the foremost experts from around the world and the entirety of written history on any subject you are interested in. there’s not really a substitute to this. 

note: you may say that people can and do come up with brilliant ideas independently of their access to written works. this is true! but if you are one of them, you should skip this section/post, because you already know what you want to say.  okay that was a little too facetious. let me revise: when i say that, without reading, it will be hard to come up with more complex ideas than what you have now, that isn’t necessarily pejorative. maybe your current ideas and impulses are original and meaningful and complex. if they aren’t, however, you don’t have to resign yourself to it.  your experiences in real life are the most valuable thing you can bring to the table, but it can be very difficult to articulate and contextualize them without community—whether that be irl, or the simple textual company of other writers. you can let other people help you and teach you.  basically, this is a long winded way of saying something extremely simple: reading is not the only way to gain knowledge, or even the best. but it is an extremely consistent and relatively egalitarian way.** **scihub and libgen and sometimes the public library are your friends. (my local library’s book coverage is spotty) who cares about piracy. LMAO. 

you may surprise yourself by how nicely you fall into little spirals. you read one thing. and you are enamored with the way the author approaches their subject. so you end up reading everything else they’ve written, and then you start on the authors they list that inspire them in their interviews. maybe you just read one article that’s a little dry but it cites something else that seems far more interesting. read that next. and so on. 

if you are struggling to read that’s okay. you have options. start a book club (or just get a friend who also wants to read more). if that sounds like too much work, pick a friend to keep updated on all your new facts. you just want to get used to reading something, and telling someone your favorite parts again. skim books. skip the boring parts. drop them entirely and find a more interesting one. no one’s going to quiz you. this is for your own enjoyment. 

also important here: read books that make you want to write. sometimes this is because the methods and/or prose of the author are so exciting, you want to do something just like that. sometimes it’s because the content is so exciting, you want to say something about that too. sometimes they speak so powerfully to your own life, you want to tell people this is me!! i see this!! there are books i just enjoy reading, sure, and i do read them. but you know how, like, a good movie makes you want to tell stories too? good theory should do that too, in my opinion. 

step one: you have some ideas now. 

these ideas don’t have to be set in stone. but you should have an idea now of what you might talk about. personally, for me, i have two interconnected types of essay ideas. 

interventions. this is like [tumblr voice] Why Is Nobody Talking About This. i see some sort of hole. maybe i know how to fill it, maybe i don’t. 

free associations. basically i read one thing, or some analysis of one thing. and then it reminded me of another thing. and i’m like. i want to tease apart their connections, their similarities, and their differences. 

there are more types of ideas, i’m sure. but these are the ones i consistently have. with me, the second kind is more common. very rarely do i find that my thoughts are that original. rather, i’ve found that one of my strengths as a writer is being able to make connections that other people haven’t made, or haven’t made in depth before. IN MY OPINION. 

so i find it quite flexible. maybe i watch a movie, and it reminds me of my own life, because i think two women in the movie could be sad queer freaks. and i’m a sad queer freak. or it could be that i think scum villain could be analyzed through the framework of freudian psychoanalysis. you get the idea. 

at this stage of the process, i don’t have a thesis, necessarily. but i have a couple phrases i’m drawn to. i have a bullet point or two. i have vibes. 

to use an example from this blog, one of my friends hui once mentioned that that one fan image was going around again. we were going ughhh it’s victorian not chinese! together and they said “you should write a meta on it.” i wasn’t sure quite yet what i had to say. but i knew a couple things. 

this is, incidentally, because i had done some research into chinoiserie before, because i had cited the zuroski book for a paper i had to write for an english class some years before on pride and prejudice and its use of descriptions of material culture, an essay that in turn was inspired by my random yet deeply felt conviction that jane austen hated me personally and wanted to kill me.  this is why i encourage reading a lot. i think. 

to work on this stage, make lists. lots of them. i have a .txt file where i keep every essay idea i have. a lot of them are a sentence. or they're lists of books or theorists i think i could make something out of. or they're theses that feel true, but i’m not sure why yet. 

it took me a while to get to this point. just like with writing fic, there was a period when i first started where i was like. i only have one idea. i’m going to write it, and then i’m never going to write again. and then i had just one more idea. after a while. eventually you will find you have so many ideas and the world is full of possibilities. it’s a muscle you have to flex. like reading. and telling people about what you’re reading. 

actually, i feel like there was a step 0.5 here that i completely skipped. 

step zero point five that i skipped: how to generate ideas

my very truly complete “first time writing something semi-academic that was original” (with a loose definition of the word original) was literally just me reading literary criticism of one book, and saying “i think this author’s thoughts can be applied to this other book” and found some textual evidence that supported that the process could be replicated. 

this is like, writing with training wheels on. eventually i got better at it (see aforementioned chinoiserie essay. i hope you agree.). but that was a good place to start for me. it made the proverbial blank page less intimidating, knowing i had a scaffolding. 

i suggest trying this. see how it goes for you. read around until you find some piece of criticism, or just some theory about how something works, that you like. and using your newfound hammer, go look for some nails. 

note: i know this expression is meant to like. be a negative thing. but you do have to start somewhere. it’s okay if it sucks. it’s just for your practice and your enjoyment. 

be cautious of stances. weak writing (in my OPINIONNNN) tries to unilaterally defend or condemn a behavior. what you need to do is treat your writing as a bit. and then you need to run with it. you need to take it farther than what is reasonable. if this bit is truly actually deeply true, then what does it mean about yourself? it’s like using a new set of pronouns as a joke or something. you know what i mean? (that was an example of what i’m trying to communicate here)

what else is key to look out for... look for oppositional pairs or tensions. look for perverse incentives and vicious circles. look for embarrassing ideas. that is, what would be extremely embarrassing if it was true? (or to admit that it was true) you may go—tshirt, here you’re just describing things that are sexy. yes, exactly, that’s the point. you want things that thrill. 

just keep reading and making notes until everything echoes with something else. now you’re ready for step two. 

step two: refine your ideas further. 

let me do this by demonstration. once more extending my earlier example of my chinoiserie essay, i knew that i really wanted to take zuroski’s points and basically... steal them. this is called “citation,” i guess. but i thought the following insights were useful to me: 

british women were invested in chinese material objects 

they incorporated them into their own subjectivity

past a certain point, they no longer “consumed” these signifiers, but these signifers became theirs 

critique of one was able to stand in for critique of the other

and from being on fandom twitter, i already had the following insights: 

people deliberately blurred the lines between china and england when it came to fans and tea

people also liked talking about victorian modesty when it came to china 

so it seemed like victorian england and china had a privileged relationship, in a lot of people’s minds in fandom. 

so it didn’t really seem a stretch to say... how can we look at one history, and apply it to our present? 

it was a bit of the combo of the two: i saw something i didn’t see people were talking about, and it reminded me of something else i’d read before. 

something that helps me a lot is tweeting about my essay ideas. if you have me on my private account, you already know this. it forces me to explain myself to someone who doesn’t know what i’m talking about in a very succinct way. oftentimes, i tweet something out while i’m brainstorming, and then i steal the phrasing back into my essay. see? tweets can be writing too. 

this is microdosing on step zero’s “read something and practice telling a friend about it.” now you’re writing something and telling a friend about it. 

step three: okay now you can like. open a google doc 

make an outline. i know i know i know. i’m sorry. you can start just barfing thoughts if you want, but eventually everything that was on the top of your head will be out. and now you can start thinking about structure. the reason the outline is important is because it makes clear the logical progression from one idea to the next. 

i know i usually bounce around in my writing (a tendency which has been magnified here because this is so casual LMAO), but i always want to make sure that my points are substantiated. if we want to talk about how a causes b, we should prove a, we should prove the causal link, and only then can we infer b, for instance. it doesn’t really matter what order that happens in (or even that we set about it that way), but the more complicated your idea is, the longer checklist you need. it’s just a checklist. that’s all. 

as you start writing, you’ll probably need to read some more. you’re going to want to say something you think is true, but you’re going to realize that you haven’t proved it (or you can’t). go look to see if someone else has proved it. 

maybe you’re right. add that evidence in. maybe you’re wrong. now your essay has a new direction. there is a living thing beneath you. actually, on that idea— 

i tend to structure my outlines (if i’m not sure yet what my point is) by pasting a bunch of quotes in a document, and reorganizing them until they make sense, they seem to flow. and then i start explaining why, until i realized i have begun to walk off in a new direction. always embrace that new direction. eventually you will find that you have not been taking twists and turns, but actually you were dizzily walking along a straight path. (unless you have been unfocused and you are trying to say too many things at once. ask a friend to read your essay if you’re not sure which is the case.) 

quotes are the smallest unit of your analysis. work with evidence. or, at least, i do. it makes writing an essay like solving a mystery. the idea of just spontaneously generating something new fills me with terror. rather, i want to autopsy something, trace its steps, and then discover how it came to be dead. this may not be true for you. but it’s true for meeeee and this is my post. 

tl;dr

0. read something and tell someone about it/post it out

0.5. come up with a bit and run with it

1. think "why is no one talking about this" or start free associating

2. come up with weird connections and tell someone about it/post it out

3. collect all of your posts and ideas into a gdoc and organize them.

anyway i like reading posts like this because i’m incredibly nosy. so i tried to write out the sort of thing i like to read from other people. i don’t suggest you actually try to replicate it (if anyone would even want to.) practically basically i just encourage you to try any single part of this that you think was interesting or relatable or helpful. personally, i suggest reading a book and posting your favorite lines from it. if you do this a couple times, i think you will find the seeds of an essay waiting for you in your own posts. 

#x

[zoe-oneesama]

Saw your post about Andre

What do u think about Zoe, then?

As a character, she's not bringing anything worth getting excited about. Personality wise, she's just Marinette-Pre-Origins: sweet and eager for friends, but ultimately letting her fear of Chloe rule her behavior until someone else reaches out, and now she suddenly has a spine. And I'm all for the idea of Marinette taking the lessons she learned in Origins about standing up for herself and not sitting by and letting injustices happen, and then turning around and inspiring someone else to do the same, so on paper, Marinette being that person for Zoe would be sweet and make sense. Except we have a full class of kids that she could've and should've already been that inspiration for, so this feel very Too Little Too Late.

And the few things they did to try and make Zoe unique didn't have enough thought or effort put into them so they fall flat.

So she got bullied out of her old school because she "was playing a part; being someone else" and when she dropped the act, "everyone turned against me". Um, yeah, if I found out my friend who'd I'd been confiding in and getting close to lied and faked their entire personality, I wouldn't want to be friends with them anymore either. I wouldn't go so far as to put cockroaches in their locker, but I can't blame Zoe's old "friends" for feeling betrayed.

(And let's be real, the writers definitely HAD to throw in the cockroaches thing so that Zoe actually had examples of being bullied instead of "no one wanted to be my friend anymore when they found out I was a totally different person")

So she's an actress, putting on different faces to please the people around her (clearly, she learned nothing from her previous experience - it's reasonable that people didn't like you because you lied, not because they didn't like who you really are). But then they didn't even keep up this 'acting' thing for more than one episode! Sure, she dusts it off in "Gabriel Agreste", but that entire aspect of Zoe's story is resolved as soon as it's introduced.

(Though it's obvious that the show is trying to convince you that her old friends DID turn on her JUST because they didn't like her as a goody-two shoes nice girl).

With Zoe putting on a fake persona, there could've been intrigue over the episode, or even the season, about who Zoe really is. Like, Marinette is SURE that Zoe is faking being like Chloe, but she has no way to know Zoe wasn't faking being nice to her when they first met. Why not show Zoe putting on different personas than just those two? Have Zoe interact with Juleka by being low energy and stand offish, then swapping to bubbly and energetic around Rose? Have Marinette be confused and that becomes part of the Mystery of Zoe?

And how about that contrivance, that Marinette met "nice" Zoe first and so is SOOOOO sure that Zoe is faking being "mean"? And because Marinette declares this To Be So, all of her friends just believe Marinette and are willing to give Zoe a chance. (despite not believing her about other things *cough* Lila *cough*) This is the same Marinette who's canonically declared her hatred of "liars" more than once, so even if Zoe is only "pretending" to be mean, why is Marinette giving her a pass? I'll tell you why - because we need to seamlessly integrate Zoe into the main friend group so we can speed run her taking over as the new Bee.

Because that's the main problem with Zoe - it's so blatantly obvious what the writers are trying to get out of her, because they don't even TRY to hide it. Don't get it twisted, I don't care that Zoe is brought in to replace Queen Bee, Queen Bee deserves to be replaced. I care how Zoe was brought in to replace Queen Bee. If the writers had taken enough time and care to ACTUALLY seamlessly integrate Zoe, instead of just shoving her in and bending the characters to accept her with no hesitation, then Zoe wouldn't come across as such a Mary Sue-Diet Marinette.

We already have a pretty full cast, so making the audience care about this new character that they've neither hinted at or bothered to build up to in Season 4 was already a big ask. Which is why I believe they should've stretched her "faking personas" story over several episodes. Have Marinette be as wary about Zoe as she was about Lila, esPECIALLY since she's Chloe's sister, but then have Zoe showcase her range of "personas" to throw Marinette off guard. Then you can have scenes of Zoe's mask slipping, like small acts of heroism where there's no time to think: pulling someone out of the way of an akuma attack, distracting the akuma if it gets too close to Ladybug, or even using her acting to help someone else get out of trouble despite Zoe getting nothing in return. Show the REAL Zoe through her actions DESPITE her acting, which then justifies Marinette being sure that "mean" Zoe isn't the real one.

Could've even had Chloe notice that Zoe's slipping and isn't acting very much "like a Bourgeois" and make it CHLOE who digs up that Zoe was bullied, make it CHLOE who airs out all the things that were done to Zoe. I mean, who better to call out a poser than Chloe? Especially since the rest of the class would more willing to take Zoe's side against Chloe (you would think) and it helps with the whole Zoe vs Chloe thing with the Bee Miraculous. Plus, having that information aired out when Zoe didn't want it to could've been a better reason to be akumatized than just "I'm giving in to playing the role I was already determined to play and putting my shoes in this hole with my dreams." Just saying.

But they didn't want to take the time. They didn't want to try. They didn't want to put in the effort to make Zoe someone to care about, both for the audience and for the characters. They shoved her in, gave her an exposition dump, and suddenly everyone was totally cool with her, No Questions Asked. In fairness, they didn't actually have Zoe be mean to anyone other than Marinette One Time in front of Chloe, so there wasn't much to overcome. But that's just another check in the "wow, you didn't even try" column.

I can't bring myself to care about Zoe because she's just a tool. She was brought in with the sole purpose of putting in nearly no effort to become friends with everyone and use the Bee Miraculous, as quickly as possible and as effortlessly as possible. Never mind that such a thing probably should have been earned. I just hate it when I can see the writer's intentions so blatantly.

But I get it, the Bee Miraculous is seriously OP and it'd be a shame not to use it just because Queen Bee was benched. Too bad Ladybug can't just merge Miraculouses and use it hersel- ohhhh, wait.

#it doesn't escape my notice that Vesperia seems to have more screen time than Zoe just saying #she's a tool she's a vessel so they can just use 'Venom' without having to bring in Queen Bee #WHO SHOULDN'T BE BROUGHT IN SO I'M NOT MAD ABOUT THAT PART #it's just like...try? Could they have tried? #Also it could've been a good way to confront Marinette's hatred of 'liars' to have Zoe pull off the 'Lila' thing #but doing so in order to protect herself instead of to gain favors and praise #zoe salt #writing salt #ml salt #my opinion #an essay by zoe

[bibbityboppitybillyharvgrove]

Always There - Chapter Two: S.Snape

Summary: Y/N Potter was left with a baby to care for after her brother and sister-in-law were murdered by Voldemort. One person was there for her, a person she didn’t expect but soon became her comfort person, Severus Snape. During Harry’s third year at Hogwarts and her third year as Herbology professor, a few old friends come around again. Y/N has to handle the feelings of these old friends being around again as well as handle her feelings for a certain potions master all while she tries to hide these things from her godson.

Series Masterlist

My full Masterlist

Pairings: Severus Snape x Female Professor Reader, Potter!Reader x friend!Remus

Chapter Warnings: Female Reader, Potter Reader(No physical description of reader) probably shitty writing, Harry growing up in a loving home, mentions of death and murder, mentions of Azkaban, shittyly written angst, flashbacks,

Series Warnings: Female Reader, Potter Reader (No physical description of reader) probably shitty writing, OOC Snape, Harry grows up in a loving environment, mentions of death and murder, poorly written angst, Remus is a shitty friend, poorly written pining,

Please let me know how I can improve my writing and being more inclusive to POC as I am whiter than white. Please also let me know if I have to add more to the warnings! My messages are open as well as my asks!

I am starting a taglist so leave either a comment or something in my asks if you would like to be tagged in any of my works or just this series!

Author's Note: Please let me know how I can improve or if you find any errors! Correct me, don't be afraid to! I want to improve my writing and become a better writer so any feedback or advise is welcomed!

Word Count: 1994

My asks are open for questions, suggestions and feedback!

Feedback is welcomed and encouraged!

Enjoy!

not my gif

not my gif

About a week after the two professors had fallen asleep whilst talking, everything was kind of normal. Y/N was actively avoiding Remus and Severus has been particularly rude to the new professor. Harry had finally taken to questioning his aunt about her strange behavior and Snape’s aggressive nature toward Remus. He had waited until after dinner, following her into the greenhouse.

“Aunt Y/N, Professor Lupin said he knew my parents. Did you know him too?” Harry asked, trying to mask his intentions.

“You just want to know why I avoid him, don’t you?” She sighed, looking her nephew in the eye.

“I can’t hide anything from you, can I?”

“You certainly cannot, my love. I know you too so I know you won’t leave me alone until I tell you or you pester Sev enough to tell you. Come sit with me, this is gonna be a longer talk than I want it to be but you deserve to know everything about the situation,” She explained. The two Potters entered her office and sat on the very same couch Minerva had spotted Y/N and Severus the week earlier. “We can start off with how I first met Remus. We met on platform 9 ¾ right before the train came, James was off with some of his friends…”

**

The platform was bustling with witches and wizards alike, the anticipation waiting for the Hogwarts Express was palpable. James was off chatting with Sirius and Y/N was sitting on the ground with her nose stuck in her herbology book. Her mind was racing because she was nervous about what house she would be put in, she was wondering who her professors were, if they were nice and so on. James promised her that all of the professors were nice, Dumbledore, McGonagall and Slughorn were some he mentioned by name. Although James had tried reassuring her, it didn’t do much to help ease her nerves.

“You’re James’ sister, right?” A voice came from her right, startling her slightly, “Sorry to frighten you, he has a picture of the two of you in our dorm so I thought I’d say hi. My name is Remus.”

“Like Remus and Romulus? That’s pretty cool. I’m Y/N, it’s nice to meet you,” She said. The two had begun chatting, talking about where they lived, what their families were like, Remus asked her what subject she was most excited to learn about and of course the young witch had said Herbology.  

Once the train had arrived, Remus and Y/N boarded together, talking all the while as they tried to find a compartment to sit in. The only empty one was in the back of the train so the two sat and talked the whole ride to Hogwarts, The conversation only pausing when the sweets trolley rolled by and when James and Sirius had popped in to say hello.

Their friendship only grew from there, Remus helping her study for DADA and History Of Magic and Y/N helping him study for Charms and Herbology. Once Remus had joined James, Sirius and Peter, the five wizards got up to lots of trouble. Although Y/N was a year younger than the other four, she was more than willing to help out with pranks. Her and Remus, however, were the only two that strayed away from bullying other students, especially Severus Snape.

**

“That was how Remus and I became friends, he was the fastest friend I had ever made. We talked for only like a minute and became friends right away. We got closer and closer as the years went on. I'll spare some details about our friendship because we got into some trouble or we would just hang out in the library reading or studying. Everything got rough once James and Lily were killed.”

**

Remus showed up to the destroyed house in Godric’s Hollow, Y/N outside of the fence with a crying Harry in her arms, Severus standing beside her, his cloak over her shoulders to keep her warm in the cold autumn air. 

“Y/N, is it true? He killed them?” Remus asked her.

“J-Jamie and Lils are dead, h-he tried t-to kill Harry but he s-survived somehow,” She stuttered out behind her tears. Severus excused himself so the two friends could talk things out.

“Peter is dead, Sirius was the one who sold them out, he murdered Peter and a dozen muggles,” He explained, “Listen, dove, I need to go, I’ll send you an owl okay?” She just nodded and watched him apparate away. 

She was left for a while to cry, until Severus showed up and escorted her elsewhere, somewhere she could be safe and warm with baby Harry. Somewhere she could escape the reality that faced her, she was alone with a child she didn’t know how to care for, a child that would be legend. A boy who lived, the only known survivor of the killing curse and the defeater of Lord Voldemort. 

**

“I know you like professor Lupin and I understand that, he's a great guy. He just left me at a time where I really needed him. We got into an argument last week and I’ve been avoiding him since,” Y/N explained, “I don’t want any of this to change the way you look at Lupin, he’s an incredibly smart man and an extremely talented wizard.”

Harry decided to let things go until winter came around. He had once again been attacked by a dementor, luckily Dumbledore stopped his fall before he hit the ground of the Quidditch pitch. Harry went to Remus for help but he was too weak at the time, after the break he was promised a lesson about patronuses, a way to keep himself safe from dementors. 

Harry had the wonderful idea to sneak around Hogsmeade with the invisibility cloak (even though he had permission to go), finding out from Minerva, after sneaking in behind her and the minister of magic, that Sirius Black was his godfather. Herminone and Ron helped Harry back to Hogwarts, where he sought out his aunt.This of course, was against the advice of Hermione who told him to just sleep it off and talk to her in the morning. He knew she was in the greenhouses, either tending to the plants or grading student papers. What he didn’t expect to find was her and the potions master laughing over tea. He stared at the pair, tears threatening to leave his eyes, the sense of betrayal weighed heavy on him.

“You knew,” He uttered. The two professors stopped laughing and turned to Harry, not expecting him to be in her office.

“What happened, my love? Why are you so upset?” Y/N asked, her voice laced with concern for her nephew.

“You knew,” He repeated.

“What are you talking about Harry? What did I know?” She was confused, she had never seen her nephew so distraught over something before, she wanted nothing but to help him with whatever he was dealing with.

“You knew that Sirius Black killed my parents! You knew that Sirius Black ratted them out to Voldemort! You knew Sirius Black! You know he’s my godfather! He was your friend!” Harry finally shouted at his aunt.

“There is no need to shout, Harry, come sit, let��s talk this out,” Y/N said calmly although deep down she too, was distraught. She had never wanted Harry to know about Sirius’ role in his life but somehow, he had found out.

“No, I want you to tell me right here! I don’t want to sit and talk!”

“That is no way to speak to your aunt, Harry,” Snape chimed in, upset with how the boy was screaming at his aunt, the woman who cared for him and loved him his whole life.

“You shut up, this has nothing to do with you!”

“Harry! Apologize to him right now!” Y/N scolded, the tension in the room was rising, she knew at any moment that Harry would snap and in turn so would Severus.

“NO! He has no right to be a part of this conversation! It’s between me and you!” Severus was about to go at the boy but once Y/N had laid her hand on his shoulder, he stopped short. The pair made eye contact, Severus knowing she wanted to handle this by herself so he excused himself to her office to get the potion ingredients he originally came to her for.

“I knew about Sirius being your godfather, yed. Of course I did, I’m your godmother, the two of us did everything for you until Sirius turned on us. He was your father’s best friend,” Y/N told her nephew.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Harry demanded the answer.

“I didn’t want you to know, you’ve dealt with enough in your life, I didn’t want to add another thing on top of it.”

“So you knew he sold out my parents to Voldemort?”

“Yes, I knew. Trust me Harry, I didn’t like it just as you don’t. I feel just as betrayed if not more because he was like a brother to us,” Y/N tried to explain, somehow keeping herself calm throughout the conversation even though she kept seeing the picture of her brother dead on the floor in her mind.

“You feel betrayed! You’ve lied to me my whole life! You never told me anything! Nothing about Professor Lupin, nothing about Sirius Black, nothing about Peter Pettigrew! Why?” Harry went back to shouting at his aunt, a glass next to her shattering to pieces.

“Because it hurts me Harry! It hurts to even think about it, let alone talk about it! Remus and Sirius were my brothers and they betrayed me! Peter at least died instead of betraying us, instead of leaving me! It pains me to talk about your father but I do it anyway, for you! Everything I do is for you Harry, don’t you realize that! You are the most important thing in my life! You expect me to just turn around and hurt you the way I got hurt once I learned about all of this!” She shouted back, the glass from some of her cabinets shattered as she shouted at the boy.

“If I’m the most important thing in your life, why lie? Why hide this from me!” Harry was now just looking for a fight, he was getting information out of his aunt by upsetting her so he continued to do it. 

“Because I love you! Because I care about you! You are my boy! You are like the son I never got to have! You are exactly like your father! Your father that I miss every single day because he was my best friend! You are the only family I have Harry James Potter! You are the only family I will ever have!” She had begun crying, wiping her tears as they came to try and appear like she was not crying even though Harry knew she was. 

“You’re not my mother! You will never be my mother!” Harry screamed at her, this caused the woman to burst into tears, Severus had come back into the room once he had heard her crying.

“That’s enough Harry, go back to your dormitory,” Severus said sternly.

“No!”

“Stop acting like a defiant child and do as I say. You’ve done enough, you wanted your answers, you got them. Now go!” The potion’s master was furious at the boy, he had never seen Harry act this way before, in all the years of knowing him, this had never happened. Harry had stormed out of the greenhouse leaving the two professors once again. The day had started off cheerful and happy and ended with Y/N in despair and spiraling due to not only her nephew but remembering what she had seen and the trials and tribulations she had gone through.

taglist

@acupnoodle @chxelsxaa @fluffyrat365 @fanficwriter5

#best friend sirius #harry potter #james potter #james potter x sister!reader #moony #moony wormtail padfoot and prongs #padfoot #pro snape #professor snape #prongs #severus snape x y/n #severus snape x reader #severus snape #sirius black #sirius black x reader #sirius orion black #james & peter & remus & sirius #remus lupin #remus john lupin #albus dumbledore #dumbledore #maruaders #hp marauders #hp fandom #hp fanfic

[barbsgirlfriend]

Velvet & Veneer headcanons

Genre: Headcanons

Fandom: Trolls

Warnings: none!

Pairing: a little bit of Veneer x Kid Ritz

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Veneer 🌟

Bro is a bitch 😭

Veneer is mean just like Velvet but in a more sophisticated way. She’s straight up mean and he’s more of the fake mean. He’ll pretend to like you then talk shit about you behind your back.

BOY KISSER!! GAY?! LIKES MEN??

Veneer is bisexual but has a preference for guys. He also might have a crush on the Bop on Top interviewer. 🤭

He’s very sensitive

He’s a very emotional person. No matter what, his feelings control him. However, Veneer’s better at managing it than Velvet. Did someone just insult him? He’s pissed off. Did someone just hug him? He’s very happy.

Veneer can bust some moves bro 🤯

He isn’t really that much into singing. Veneer only agreed to become a pop star because his sister wanted to. Veneer is much more into dance. He took ballet and jazz dance classes when he was younger and loved dancing ever since.

He struggles with impostor syndrome

Now, Veneer is… okay at singing and dancing. He struggles with his self image when performing and is scared of disappointing Velvet.

Veneer has veneers 🤓☝️

He was doing something stupid with Velvet when he was younger and fell. He knocked some of his teeth out and damaged some others. So he had to get veneers and dental implants. He also has a small gap in his front teeth.

Fashionista who???

Veneer only wants to look good. He makes sure all his clothing is presentable and expensive. Veneer pretty much picks out the outfits he and his sister wear. He isn’t that good with hair and makeup though :(

Velvet 🌟

Nice when you get to know them friend

Most people think she’s a bitch (which she is) but she can be extremely caring for her close friends and family. Veneer prob says: “oh she’s actually nice you just gotta get to know her”

Lives on caffeine

Velvet CANNOT survive without some caffeine in her system. She likes to get espressos from Starbucks. She’ll sometimes drink Red Bulls, but only when she’s performing.

She’s one of the girls 😍

Velvet likes women. And that is that

Velvet’s on the spectrum

She was diagnosed with high functioning autism when she was like twelve. Velvet struggles with empathy and understanding other’s emotions. She’s also very mean as a way to protect herself.

Expert song writer

She might not be good at singing songs… but she’s excellent at writing them! Velvet wrote some songs that the other famous Mount Rageons sang.

Emotional af

It doesn’t take much to make her snap. Velvet gets teary eyed when she’s angry and yells. She also gives really bad silent treatment. The reason she ran away when the trolls were yelling about her kidnapping BroZone is because she runs away from her problems instead of facing them head on.

(Anyway, I hope you like my silly headcanons! I’ll try to make more soon)

#trolls #trolls 3 #band together #velvet and veneer #velvet trolls #trolls veneer #kid ritz #headcanon #trolls velvet and veneer #trolls band together #trolls headcanons

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - A Lot Ended, Quite Bit Started, I got things to say about it all

Organized, in each category, by ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Nov 2023 Wk 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

My Dear Gangster Oppa (Thurs iQIYI) 3 of 8 - This is just a great BL. So fun with few frills and paced nicely. Thai talent + Korean story is proving very harmonious for narrative flow. I’m delighted. I love that they don’t shy away from letting Tew be an actual violent criminal who is just gone and mushy for this one geeky cutie. Also I appreciate it when a show hangs a lantern on its own plot failing. In this case, the main character being drunk as a plot devise 2x in subsequent eps.

Twins the series (Fri GaGa) ep 2 of 10 - Love it. Love Spite and his chronic guilt over his younger brother, the golden child. Love that he is driven to repair for a past that no longer exists. Evil mom who cares more for what her son can do than that son, let alone his brother. The volleyball well…. erm. I played varsity (setter) so this is amusing to me but I’m not mad about it. 

I agree that this Not Me just sports and pulp. 

Last Twilight (Fri YT) 1 of 12 - JimmySea are back and is this... good? Do I like this? I don't have faith, GMMTV has been doing us dirty lately. But I think I like it! Why The Little Prince AGAIN? Ugh. 

Middleman’s Love (Fri YT & iQIYI 1 of 8 - Domundi giving us an office comedy hyung romance staring TutorYim (Cutie Pie) with NetJames (Bed Friend) and LeoTai (Friend Forever) providing support. Lets hope they stick to only 8 eps. Buckle up, I got shit talking to type.

I warned ya out the gate that this is a Cheewin comedy, so tonally it could be very OFF, and boy howdy is it EVER off. There's a place this kind of show goes where it's so cringe it's visually rotten and this one went there out that gate. Also, I'm gonna say it because no one else has, Yim is not good in this role. Comedy is HARD to do and Cheewin isn't doing this green actor any favors. He's chewing the scenery like a woodchuck after a diet.

To be fair, Tutor isn't great either, but he's been given less rope to hang himself with. Mai is currently suffering from seme obscurity: the love interest's defining characterization being = tall and handsome. (Which is not characterization... agony... glares at Cdramas.) We will see if he gets a personality, but based on past work form this director and this writer, don't bank on it.

Frankly? I'm not convinced either of them are mature enough as a pair or as actors to carry something this abrasive and to stand up to Cheewin's visual abuse of our eyeballs. I think this is going to be a rocky ride. HOWEVER, because it has tropes I'm good with (as opposed to SCOY) I'm sticking with it for now but this is gonna be ROUGH going for everyone.

Backstory: This used to be a JimmyTommy vehicle before the pair split (also prev title Middle Love). Adapted from a Y-novel. I can actually see Tommy in this role very clearly and I suspect he may have been bettern(and I am more a TutorYim fan as a pair). Also I will likely be referencing SCOY a lot while watching this because SCOY is peak Cheewin nonsense comedy but with an incredibly strong lead pair, so comparisons will be drawn.

Absolute Zero (Weds iQIYI) ep 7 of 12 - Sigh. Linguistic negotiation but for sad reasons? It fascinating but it hurts. Look, the cast is very good I just don’t like the premise.

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) The Camp Fire ep 12 of 24 - Well that was extremely odd. I’m not sure how I feel about it. If it hadn’t had the strange framework and horror component and been just a simple BL story I probably would’ve enjoyed it. Why do the pulps always  squander their best pairs? 5/10 New installment (Friends Forever) looks terrible and not BL.

Beyond The Star (Weds iQIYI) qp 1 of 8 - House of Stars meets Boyband. I am not impressed. Thailand just needs to leave everything music related to Korea. I’m enacting a ban. The framework on this is truly awful. The talent is not talented in acting let alone dance or song. I thought about sticking with it a few more eps but i putting in on hold. It’s too wooden even for me.

@heretherebedork I depend on you to report back. This is the kind of thing only you can watch. It’s like Cupid 2023. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

A Breeze of Love (Korea iQIYI) 1-2 of 8 - previously know as Weather Forecast Love this one popped up in MDL's currently airing, and I was like, what what? Basically: Tsundere insomniac grump and his sunshine jock ex bestie (human sleeping pill) who now hates him. Basketball is involved and I love it.

It ended, are we sad? REVIEWS

Kiseki: Dear to Me (Taiwan Viki & Gaga)

Yes, we sad! Ai Di and his dumb oversized sweaters and flappy flappy sleeves are EVERYTHING.

Final ep? Nice that the elder gays got screen time, more of this please? Sides dominated this finale, matched outfits and all. Also I’m living for the Bless this Mess shirt. Finally Taiwan gave us lots of biting and a counter lift. It’s like they know me!

Quick pitch for KDTM?  

The plot is totally ridiculous and slightly unhinged, but that’s normal for Taiwan. It involves all the tropes under a very casual framework of gay mafia gangs + food = love. Absolutely every character is queer. There’s a gum-ball machine of cameos, elder gay rep, great chemistry from all pairs, and a KILLER side couple. As a result Kiseki is a poster child for Taiwanese BL, and I happen to love Taiwanese BL. Bonus? They also managed to END IT WELL, which we cannot expect from Taiwan. 9/10 HIGHLY RECOMMENDED 

Triggers for knife play, child abuse, lingering trauma. I found both platforms did not do a great job on subs, but I will give the edge to Viki for pure usability.

You Are Mine (Taiwan Viki & Gaga)

We are more disappointed than sad.

Far be it from me to extend this show, but we should’ve had 2 episodes of quality supportive boyfriends coping with family drama before the mom-confrontation climax and defense of the ESTABLISHED relationship. Baby's little speach had no power or impact coming where it did in this narrative, even though it was sweet. And while the make-out scenes were charming it mostly jsut felt like we'd squandered this pair. This last ep was good and rewatchable, but a series cannot be judged on its last ep alone.

Finally... could have used some side dishes. My vote? Lesbian secretaries!

Conclusion 

I am sorry Taiwan, you know I love you, but I have to say it: this show was a mess of terrible pacing. And not a hot mess, sadly. I should have liked everything about this: it’s an office drama, it’s mature characters, it’s grumpy/sunshine, it’s a strong power dynamic, and it’s Taiwan - which means good chemistry. YAM was all those things and yet… something went horribly wrong with the narrative structure. You tried dears, but not hard enough. 7/10 

Bump Up Business (Korea Gaga)

Well, poop. Don’t have them speak English. Also no playing drunk. Meanwhile, all the manipulative gay drama. No kiss of course.

How do I summate this?

An idol group did the best they could with a script tailored to idols but which they were not allowed to fully realize because they are active idols in the same group. Ultimately it felt a bit like OnlyOneOf were just doing one of those Kpop skits for a variety show were two of of them dresses in drag/gay/BL and "ha ha isn't it funny?" I don’t know, it was fine? 6/10

stop wasting my time, Korea

Mr Cinderella 2 (Vietnam YT)

DNF on the advice of several of my BL spies I will not be finishing this. Apparently it pretty much ends sad. Here's an explanation.

It's Airing But...

I Cannot Reach You AKA I Can't Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai (Japan Tues Netflix-Japan & ????) 8 eps - in classic JBL fashion, I Cannot Reach You could not be reached. I will try it when I have some time and access to my home computer.

One Room Angel (Japan Gaga) 6 eps - adaptation of Harada’s manga (which I did not like) about a clerk who's stabbed, nearly dies, and returns home to find an angel waiting for him. With only 5 eps and a good chance this won’t end happy, I'm gonna wait and let you tell me how it goes.

WAITING FOR VERDICT OR TO BINGE

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - I find this series more fun to binge, so I'm waiting until it completes its run.

SHADOW (Thai Gaga) 14eps - this is a horror BL with ghosts & paranormal elements in a boarding school setting. I'm not wild about Thai horror (or horror at all). It features Singto (who did paranormal BL He's Coming to Me) opposite Fluke N (who's done a couple horror's before). Also Fiat. Dan suffers from sleep paralysis, and in his dreams he sees a shadow that suffocates him. It gets worse when he transfers schools. I'm holding off on this one and if told it's good I'll binge watch.

Next Week Looks Like This

11/15 Let's Eat Together Aki and Haru AKA Aki wa Haru to Gohan wo (Japan Gaga) - this BL movie is coming to Gaga.

11/16 PLAYBOYY (Thurs ????) 10 eps - trailer here, high heat and it's helmed by Cheewin (shudder) with screenplay by Den (Only Friends) under Copy A Bangkok. It's gonna be a shizz show people. It's predicting Thai style "dark" (War of Y) one of my least favorites. Apparently there is a "plot" but when has Cheewin ever bothered with plot? A university kid who was involved with escorts, sex-trade, porn, online hook-ups, drugs, prostitution, blackmail, revenge, and so forth goes missing. His twin (sigh) and two friends look for him.

11/17 Pit Babe (Fri iQIYI) ep 1 of 14 - high heat teaser here, based on alittlebixth's omegaverse novel #พิษเบ๊บ’ set in the world of car racing (author says show will not be omegaverse). Charlie (fresh face), a young hot nerd, approaches his driver idol (Pavel "my love" 2 Moons 2) to borrow a racing car and win one for the team. Production house is new to BL but behind the Club Friday stuff. Show stars many known actors: Nut (Oxygen), Pop (Ram in La Cuisine), Pon (Phai in Gen Y, we LOVE him), Benz (twins in En of Love: This Is Love Story).

Thailand bring the November heat, I guess?

Upcoming November BL

11/19 Bake Me Please (Sun Gaga) ep 1 of 6 - trailer here, stars Ohm (of OhmFluke) opposite Guide (bestie from IFYLITA) and possibly also Poom (well known, but not for BL). This looks like an actually gay version of Antique Bakery (play it again, BL). Still, I'm intrigued, it looks HELLA pretty.

11/22 7 Days Before Valentine (Weds ????) ep 1 of 10 - trailer here, horror-esk. Adapted from y-novel of the same name, directed by Tu (180 Degree) stars Jet (Why You… Y Me?). When you want your old love again, but fate sends you a reaper instead. All he can do for you is kill people. I'll likely give this a pass and wait to binge if safe.

11/25 The Sign (Sat ????) ep 1 of 10 - trailer here, horror-esk, but with a suspense and adult characters. Special investigators who loved each other in previous lives reunite in new bodies. Stars Billy Patchanon (BillySeng) & Babe Tanatat (new). Includes other SCOY favorites as a special investigation team. I may give this a try because I'm into the non-horror bits.

11/26 The Whisperer (Sun ????) 1 of 10 - trailer here. Thai horror BL that ALSO involves cheating (what joy is mine). He has dimples (My Ride) but I don't think even that gives me the will. Maybe a binge for me.

11/26 Cooking Crush (Sun YT) 1 of 12 - OffGun are back, trailer here. Adapted from the novel “Love Course! เสื้อกาวน์รุกเสื้อกุ๊กรับ” by iJune4S this is about Prem who runs a not-so-popular restaurant with 2 friends. About to go on a cooking competition with a huge reward, Prem gets involved with Ten, a stressed-out med student who wants Prem to teach him to cook.

11/30 For Him (Thurs ????) ep 1 of 10 - high heat trailer, I suspect iQIYI will scoop this one up. From the people who brought us Unforgotten Night (please no) based on a y-novel, man nursing a heartbreak has a one-night stand, but the other boy didn't want it to end. It looks terribly trashy so I'm in! Maybe I'll do a trash watch?

VIP Only (Taiwan) - may be delayed/canceled

Wuju Bakery AKA Space Bakery (Korea) - this one may be DOA

A Breeze of Love (Korea) - I know less than nothing about this.

Nov 2023 line up with screen caps here. Not kept updated.

Original 2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED).

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

This is in the intro card of My Dear Gangster Oppa, I'm just amusing myself.

Thank you Keseki for givign this to us twice!

Also the tears! So pretty crying.

And, of course, my favorite the biting!

Have I mentioned recently how much I love Taiwanese BL?

(Last week)

#this week in bl #bl updates #bl review #2023 bl #upcoming bl #Kiseki: Dear to Me review #Kiseki: Dear to Me #Taiwanese BL #You Are Mine review #You Are Mine #Bump Up Buisness Review #bump up business #Korean BL #My Dear Gangster Oppa #Thai BL #Twins the series #middleman's love #TutorYim #new bL #Beyond The Star #a breeze of love #Let's Eat Together Aki and Haru

[linos-luna]

hii <3

i hope you had a nice day today🤎

i was wondering if you could do a fic where either yandere bang chan or lee know takes care of clingy-baby reader like where they do everything for the reader -honestly i don’t really know 😭i’m just in that needing to depend on someone mood i’m sorry if this is weird 😭😭 it’s my first time requesting~~

also i just wanted to say that your writing is amazing and you’re my favourite writer on tumblr at the moment 🧸

thank you so much please don’t feel like you have to do it i’m sorry if this bothers you🤎🤎🤎

I’m your current favorite?? 🥺 you’re so kind, I appreciate it 😭💜

I was actually planning on writing one like this for Yandere! Lee Know. So this is just perfect timing.

Hope you like 💕

Sorry it took so long!

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Sweet Kitten ❣️🔪

Yandere! Lee Know x Fem!Reader

Warnings: yandere, 18+, light smut, controlling behavior, fingering, ddlg ? , Stockholm Syndrome?

♡ —————————— 🧸 —————————— ♡

Daddy knows best so why would you question him? He loves and cares for you 24/7. All you want is his love. However, you never realized just how obsessed he was with you…

Minho came into the bedroom, obviously a bit annoyed but gave you a weak smile when seeing you on the bed.

“What’s wrong daddy? Who was at the door?”

“Ah… no one… it was nothing.” He lied as he patted your head.

You nodded and gave him a hug. He paused for a moment before hugging you back, thinking about the conversation from just a few minutes ago.

There was someone at the door; it was your friend Jihyo, and she asking about you. Minho was actually surprised you still had friends, he was sure he scared them all away. But this one was persistent. He thought back on the amusing conversation…

“You can’t see her!”

“Why not?! What’s wrong with you?!” She replied, very concerned.

“Because she doesn’t want to see you.”

“Not true. You’re insane!” Jihyo yelled as the door was slammed in her face.

“You can’t do this! She doesn’t belong to you!” She continued pounding on the door while yelling.

“Come on baby.” Minho said with a smile. “Let’s get you ready for bed.”

“Bath time?!”

“Yes bath time.” He chuckled at your enthusiasm and led you to the bathroom.

He got the water ready and started helping you undress. You got in the tub and was excited as he got some soap and a rag to clean you.

Afterwards, Minho dried you up and dressed you in some warm pajamas. He brushed your hair and had you sit so he could braid it. He loved braiding your hair.

“Daddy I wanna watch a movie.”

“It’s a little late for that, Isn’t it?” He replied while tying off your last braid,

“But I wanna cuddle with daddy” you pouted.

Minho couldn’t say no to you and agreed.

-

You watched as he made hot chocolate and pulled out some cookies as well.

“Where’d you get the cookies, daddy?” You ask curiously as you reach for one.

“A friend of mine made them.” Minho replied while handing you one.

You both drank your hot chocolate in the kitchen and Minho fed you some cookies before heading to the living room to pull up Netflix.

You sat on top of your boyfriend with a blanket as you watched the movie. He was so nice and warm. Minho slipped his hand under your shirt and was gropping your right breast. He loved the feeling of your warm flesh and he slipped his other hand in your pants.

You whined a bit at the feeling but it soon turned pleasurable as he went under your already wet panties and started fingering you.

“You like that baby…?” Minho teased, his hot breath tickling your neck. “You like daddy’s fingers?”

“Yes daddy…”

After putting two fingers in, he was slowly moving in an out with ease; he loved the sounds of your whimpers so rubbed your clit to hear more…

“More daddy.” You moaned. “More please!”

“So greedy hm? But anything for my sweet kitten.”

After continuing to rub your clit and pinching your nipple, you soon came with a loud moan.

Minho knew you wouldn’t last the whole movie so he wasn’t very surprised when you fell asleep soon after your orgasam.

He wrapped you up in the blanket and carried you to the bedroom where he tucked you in.

Your boyfriend stripped to his boxers and left for a moment to brush his teeth.

“D-daddy?!” You sat up and called out to him the second you didn’t feel his touch.

“Don’t worry, kitten” Minho chuckled while coming back to the room while brushing his teeth. “I’m right here.”

You got up and went to him, giving a tight hug. “I’m sleepy. Let’s go sleep.”

“Yes baby, hold on a moment.”

Minho goes to the bathroom to finish cleaning his teeth while you held onto him. You both went back to the bed and your boyfriend tucked you in. He laid next to you and you cuddled into him as you drifted off to sleep.

———

Later that night Jihyo and some others decided that they were going to get you out and devised a plan.

It was almost 4am and friend was able to unlock the window in the living room with a hair pin. She looked around and tried to figure out how she would get past a sleeping Minho. That’s when she heard the bedroom door open and she hid. But much to her surprise, it was actually you. You were going to the bathroom. 

Jihyo waited for you to come out and quickly grabbed you when you did, making sure to smother your scream.

“Hey! Hey y/n!” She said in a loud whisper. “It’s me, Jihyo!”

“Jihyo…?” You calmed down as she let go of you. “W-what are you doing?”

“I’m getting you out of here.” She said, now tugging on your arm.

“But why?” You ask while following her. “Daddy loves me, he’ll be so worried.”

Jihyo was appalled by what you just said and sighed as you both were in front of the window.

“Do you hear yourself?! He’s controlling you!”

“But I need him—!” You said this a bit loud and Jihyo was quick to cover your mouth and push you out the window.

In front, there was a car waiting and another friend was in the driver’s seat. Jihyo got in the back with you as the car started driving.

“Sorry jeongyeon… it took longer than expected.” Jihyo said with a sigh.

“It’s fine.” Jeongyeon replied, looked back at the two of you for a moment. “As long as she’s out.”

It was about a 45 minute drive and you were getting antsy.

“I-I’m cold… I wanna go home!” You cried out, getting jihyo to let go of you.

“Oh it’s that bad…” jeongyeon said as she pulled into the parking space.

“Y/n please!” Your friend said as she got you out of the car. “Minho is not as good boyfriend. He is controlling and manipulative. Not good for you!”

“B-but he takes care of me!” You cried, wiping your tears. “I miss him!”

Both girls sighed as they brought you in and were met with another friend, setting up a place for you to sleep on the couch.

“Hey y/n. Remember me?”

“Momo?” You were surprised to see her… actually haven’t seen her in a while.

“You’re sleeping here.” Momo patted the couch with blankets and smiled.

“No I gotta go home now…”

“Y/n…” jihyo sighed. “Get some sleep, we will discuss in the morning. You were reluctant but eventually agreed as you were very tired.

Meanwhile, Minho was in a state of panic, practically turning the place upside down looking for you. He had woken up around 5 when realizing you weren’t there and started freaking out.

“Y/n? Y/n?! Where are you!” He yelled out in desperation. “My baby, where’d you go?! Who took my sweet kitten?!”

Then it hit him. Jihyo. Your friend from earlier. She must’ve taken you! He was pissed and grabbed a jacket and his keys.

Who’s house did you go to? He thought to himself. Jihyo’s would be too obvious. Your friend jeongyeon lived relatively close so probably not her… so that leaves Momo. Of course! The furthest house of the three!

Soon he was driving, not only worried for you but also pissed at your friends… he wants to hurt them for taking his baby away…

#kpop x reader #kpop #kpop imagines #kpop smut #fanfic #stray kids #stray kids smut #skz x reader #stray kids yandere #stray kids minho #lee minho #lee know #kpop yandere #yandere stray kids #yandere Lee know #skz fanfic #Lee know x poc reader #yandere #skz lee know #skz minho #stray kids imagines

[wenellyb]

Random thoughts on Bucktommy and Buddie

Please bare in mind that I'm only sharing my personal opinion and that I'm always open to discuss.

The discussions I've had over the past couples of weeks have been very interesting and I wanted to add my 2 cents.

Before season 7 episode:

I'm a causal viewer of 911 and I'm also on Tumblr so of course, I know Buddie, but I've never really shipped it... I can understand the appeal and I think the ship has potential but I never felt like the writers ever intended to go there. And I'm not a big fan of non-canon ships.

If they had gotten together, however, I think that I would have enjoyed it.

What has always bothered me was the behavior of some Buddie shippers who would complain about queerbaiting on the show, when there were already several Queers characters in it and one character (Hen), who's part of the main cast. I always got a weird feeling that those shippers didn't care about Queer characters if they weren't White. There is also a spinoff of the show, 911 Lone star with Queer characters who are also part of the main cast.

To me, the fact that Buck and Eddie never got together was a writing decision, not queerbaiting or anything like that... the writers had decided this wasn't the way to go for Buck and Eddie's chatacters, because if they had wanted to write a storyline between them, they could have.

I've seen a lot of people being happy about Buck being confirmed as Bi, and I get it. But to me, it was confirmed he was bi in the 911/911 Lone Star crossover when TK told Buck he had a boyfriend after Buck asked him out. I was just waiting for a storyline to confirm it. Obviously, I always thought the storyline would involve Eddie, but I was wrong.

After Season 7 Episode 4:

I follow some 911 accounts so I knew something was happening before the episode aired and I saw a preview of Buck seemingly being jealous of Eddie leaving with Tommy and I thought... this is it, this is where the writers are going to confirm Buddie. Buck will realize his jealous and realize he has feeling for Eddie or something like that.

I was very curious so I tuned in for that episode and imagine my surprise when I realized at the end, that the jealousy wasn't about who we thought and all this time the writers had been planning a storyline with Tommy.

So to me, it doesn't look like the writers are planning a Buddie storyline. Otherwise they would have prepared it gradually after the Buck and TK's discussion.

That doesn't mean it won't change in the future, writers and showrunners can change but I have never noticed them introducing a storyline that could lead to a Buddie relationship.

Everytime I see a post "proving" Buddie, it's always showing something friends or best friends do (hugging, being affectionnate), even Eddie making Buck Chris' legal guardian is something a best friend could do.

I'm not saying that they couldn't be romantic in another context, but there hasn't been any indication that the writers are planning a romantic plot for Buck and Eddie.

The writers decided to go there with Buck and Tommy. They're treating their story like a romcom, with the kiss, the hearteyes and everything. Buck is obviously into Tommy and being ready to tell the world about him.

That's the storyline the writers have decided to give us and it's a very nice one.

I know a lot of people are expecting Tommy and Buck to be temporary but to me that's wishful thinking. It wouldn't make sense to have Buck invite Tommy to his sister's wedding just for them to break up a few episodes later. If a breakup is what the writers had in mind, they would just set up another normal date.

Shipping goggles are ok, I have other ships for which I have shipping goggles on and for which I'm not very objective.

What's not ok is trying to ruin the fun of Bucktommy shippers who are trying to enjoy this beautiful storyline but can't go in the tags without seeing a post about the ship's impeding break up.

#bucktommy #evan buckley #tommy kinard #eddie diaz #buddie #911 spoilers #always open to discuss this as long as you're not urde #rude*