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aesopsharpmybeloved · 2 years

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Pirate Priest, or Halloween On Crockett Island

Despite its small population, Crockett Island seems quite excited for father Paul's fall festival. And father Paul is quite excited to have you as his helper.

In my Google Drive this fic is named 'the halloween disaster', because I so couldn't find the words to write it. And while this certainly isn't my best work, I don't actually hate it as much as I feared I would, so that's a relief. If anyone's interested in the Juraj Herz film, dm me, I have it on my drive (with English subtitles) - it's my all time favourite film. There will also be a nsfw fanfic which will take place after the pumpkin carrying scene ;)

gif by @lindir

Pirate Priest, or Halloween On Crockett Island (5.1K)

tw: suggestive themes (implied, mentioned), father Paul and reader are very lovey-dovey and h0rny for each other, this is cornier than Kansas in August

If there was a holiday you absolutely loved, it was Halloween. Easter was great, Christmas was brilliant, but it was Halloween who sat on the throne of holidays in your opinion. To watch a scary horror, cuddled on a couch, while sweet neighbourhood kids roamed the streets in all kinds of scary, funny and creative costumes sounded like the idea of heaven to you. This time of year always awoke your inner child, that little thing who just wanted to have fun, cause some mischief, and stuff their mouth with sweets. All in all, Halloween was a big deal for you. You always put various decor in your living space, you always carved so many pumpkins it was a small wonder your hands weren't stained permanently orange, you always put quite some time and effort into your costumes and you made special playlists of songs and horror films. And that was absolutely fine in all the places you've ever lived before.

Now, however, you lived on Crockett Island, a lonely little fishing town with a ridiculously small population, and you were therefore a little worried that all of your Halloween effort would be seen as something of a faux pas. Thankfully, you could always rely on Erin and Annie to advise you. Crockett Island was small, but it wasn't the end of the world, and local children went trick or treating just like all the kids on the mainland, and sometimes there was even a small gathering for adults to have some masqueraded fun too. Except this year, the gathering would be a little bigger.

Father Paul Hill, recently appointed as the local parish priest permanently, already had his place among the citizens of Crockett Island for some time now, but he still wanted to make his sort of mark on the little town, like Monsignor Pruitt did with Crock Pot Luck and the annual baking contest. So when he asked you to help him with preparation of Crockett Island's first fall festival, you enthusiastically agreed.

While Beverly wasn't too 'Keane' on the idea of a Halloween celebration at first (seeing it as only a step from blasphemy, not to mention she was very concerned for the well-being of her precious rec centre in which the night do would take place), she eventually agreed, after much (manipulating) convincing from the priest, that he would personally oversee that everyone present was on their best behaviour, and he would even clean up afterwards. Riley later casually mentioned that Bev probably agreed just to show off what a 'brilliant place she built for the entire community'. You for one honestly couldn't care less what was Bev's reasoning behind her giving her blessings to the party, as you were far too busy already helping Paul with the planning.

---

“How does a pirate priest sound?” asked father Paul suddenly, not looking up from the film playing on the telly. You were surrounded by darkness, lounging on your very comfortable sofa after a shared bath and watching 1978 Beauty and the Beast by Juraj Herz. It was perhaps the most macabre adaptation of the classic fairy tale and your most favourite by far. Hard to resist a gothic romance. It seemed the priest was rather enjoying it, too.

“Sounds like a wild DND session, not going to lie,” you snorted, your torso and head resting against his strong chest. You felt his sigh before it left his lips. “I don’t know what to wear,” he said at last, “I’m not even sure if I should wear any costume, I don’t want anyone to think I’m not taking my work here seriously…” His right hand was resting above your hip and his thumb drew little circles on that little area of bare skin it found there. You felt warm, comfortable and loved. Utterly content. “I don’t think you need to worry about that. If anything, it’ll show the folks you’re not above having fun with them. I’ve been told even Monsignor Pruitt wore a costume when he was invited to some masked gathering. That was before his illness, though,” you said quietly adjusting your position a little, so you could wrap both of your arms around Paul’s slim waist, “as for what to wear… I haven’t made up my mind for my costume either. I had an idea to wear something like a pink flowy gown. You know, like the one Rachel Ward wore in Thorn Birds? But then I thought it might be a little too obvious. Also, that romance didn’t exactly end happily ever after, did it.”

Paul stayed quiet for a bit, his left hand coming to join the right one on your hip, before moving to rest under your t-shirt slightly. You lifted yourself up a little and your eyes moved away from the telly screen to look at him instead. You helped wash his hair in the bath and so it currently lacked any trace of the gel he usually used to tame it back, instead framing his face in loose soft waves. You couldn’t resist reaching a hand out to comb through the dark locks, making him close his eyes in bliss for a moment. “We could just give you some cat ears and call it a day,” you said cheekily. Paul snorted and finally looked at you: “Really?” “You’d be adorable. Especially with your hair like that, you look so pretty.” Even in the dim room illuminated mostly by the TV screen, you could see his cheeks taking on a pink hue. His eyes turned back to the movie.

“What about Father Brown, then? You know, the detective priest?” he asked after a while. You thought for a moment: “That could work. But you might give some people a fright, because you’d look a lot like Monsignor Pruitt, what with the long coat and big hat…” Paul sighed in agreement. “What about a vampire, we could make you look all dark and mysterious,” you offered. “While I have utmost faith in your abilities, I don’t exactly want to be seen as some blood-sucking monster,” he replied.

The Beast appeared on the screen, his giant eagle-like head with human eyes caught on the camera in all of its glory. “Maybe I could be him?” Paul asked then. You giggled softly: “I thought you didn’t want to be a blood-sucking monster!” “Well, no, but he’s good otherwise, he’s just under the curse, isn’t he? I mean he does change back into a human in the movie?”

Once more you looked at him and pushed your fingers into his hair again: “You know what, maybe a pirate is not such a bad idea after all. As long as you leave your hair like this.”

—

It took a lot of convincing. And quite some cash. But it was worth it, completely worth it, you told yourself, even as you tried (and failed) to dust the dirt off your hands and clothes. You found a neat looking pumpkin patch on the mainland and, after speaking on the phone with the owner, managed to secure a few dozen of their glorious orange squashes. The pumpkins themselves were relatively cheap, definitely cheaper than getting them back to Crockett Island, as the farmer had to haul them on the truck himself and drive them towards the port. You also had to bribe Sturge into taking them over the thirty miles of water in his own, small fishing boat, but that was simple enough. Who knew such a large, strong, sometimes nearly intimidating looking man could be so easily won over by just a tray of cupcakes?

However, it was child’s play after that. When the Halloween party/Fall festival was announced through leaflets and the small weekly bulletin, the citizens got rather excited and Halloween decoration soon began appearing on homes, and various volunteers on the rectory’s door. Therefore, there was already a small crowd waiting for the boat back on the island. People would grab a pumpkin or two, using their bare hands, some got more on wheelbarrows, and even the electric golf cart which was usually parked next to the dirt road was buzzing through the small town that day, pumpkins secured on its back like bags of clubs. Many of the pumpkins were left in front of the rec centre, some were deposited into the schoolhouse for kids to carve, many were taken by families to further decorate their home or porch. You watched with a light heart and a happy smile as Erin and Riley walked side by side towards the woman’s home, Riley carrying a 15lb pumpkin, Erin carrying a 12lb 3 month old baby girl.

It was a sight nearly as delightful as father Paul, for once no collar in sight, dressed in work clothes and gloves. As he hauled pumpkin after pumpkin, he eventually took off his jacket to reveal not only a rather close-fitting simple t-shirt, but also two long, tanned arms. You almost tripped and fell at one point, because you were staring, mesmerised, at the muscles working in them. And once your beloved noticed so, he began teasing you - subtly, yet relentlessly. Moving very slowly, making sure you saw every flex of those muscles, making frankly obscene little grunts only you could hear while he picked up yet another pumpkin, or wiping his hands into the (previously) clean t-shirt, somehow pulling the fabric taut against his chest and stomach in the process. And then he had the utter audacity to give you a smile so innocent, you wanted to kiss it off his stupid, gorgeous face. That would have to wait though. “Are you feeling well? You look a little warm,” he whispered into your ear covertly, his voice low and husky. The gall of this man! You just gave him a cheeky little smile and whispered back in the same manner: “Oh, just you wait till I get my hands on you, father.” You watched with a small satisfaction as he shivered.

All in all, it was going rather splendidly. The festival would take place a day before Halloween, from late afternoon until around midnight (or just till everyone left), and the town was buzzing with energy. “This is getting nearly bigger than the spring festival,” Wade said one day as he was dropping off some very cute garlands Dolly and Leeza made, with little smiling bats and ghosts made out of felt fabric. The rec centre really did look beyond recognition. Instead of the large empty space which usually only had three chairs in the middle for the AA meetings, it really looked like a place ready for a party.

Some tables were put against the walls, with various festive tablecloths draped over them, others were lined into neat rows with chairs around them. The gaps between tables were spacious just enough for two people to walk comfortably next to each other. The weather was supposed to be rather mild with no rain, so Paul made the decision to put a few tables outside as well, so there was a little clear area in front of the podium. Last but not least was the decor - there were pumpkins, of course, some carved and some not, in every corner of the room, some little experimental knick-knacks you tried to DIY, and little Halloween themed fairy lights the priest was currently placing strategically on the walls, according to your directions. You were supposed to be the one to put them there originally, however with your little ladder accident still fresh in Paul’s memory, you had to step down. Literally.

“Not too shabby, huh?” you grinned at the mayor, “just imagine how cool this place will look once there are lit candles in the jack o’lanterns and themed drinks and snacks on the table!” You moved to one of the tables by the wall: “Here’s where the adult drinks will be, some beer on the tap, perhaps some wine and cider and, of course, punch. There will also be non-alcoholic punch, but it will be on this table too, so the guy handing out the drinks will keep an eye out if someone decides to spice it up a bit.” Wade chuckled next to you: “Really think that’s necessary?” “They’re good kids, I know, but better be safe and sorry. Last thing we need is a couple of drunk teenagers deciding a late night swim in the sea is a great idea.”

“So, I see the two of you got things handled really well,” the mayor said after a while, putting his hands into his pockets. “Oh no, I’m only helping, this is all father Paul’s work,” you wave your hand in dismissal. “Nonsense,” came somewhere from the right, before you heard footsteps coming closer, “I merely came up with the idea, it’s been (F/N) who’s been doing most of the work and, frankly, I’d be lost without her.” He gave you a long look, catching your gaze and you felt your cheeks turn pink under the intensity of his eyes. The gravity of Paul’s declaration seemed to be lost on the Mayor though, who only smiled at the two of you: “Don’t be so humble, you’re doing a great job, both of you. Me and Dolly, and especially Leeza, are really looking forward to this festival. But, I won’t keep you any longer. Have a nice afternoon father, (F/N).” And with that he left.

After the door to the rec centre was shut once more and a few moments passed, you turned towards your lover and put your hands against his chest, slowly moving them up until they connected behind his neck. “You’d be lost without me, huh?” you asked teasingly as you closed the gap between your bodies, your face mere inches away from his. He gave you one of his most brilliant smiles, the one that made you feel like you really were the most important thing in the universe for him, before he leaned down to steal a soft kiss from your lips. “Dreadfully lost.”

—

Your hands and arms were wet, sticky and freezing, but neither of those things could wipe the smile from your face. You carved pumpkin after pumpkin all afternoon, some cute, some creepy, some plain silly. Paul carved one or two, but then decided to make use of the pumpkin guts in preparation of some creamy soup. How could you say no to that? Now that you were done with your orange friends, you felt more than ready to go inside to wash your hands, warm up and fill your belly with some hot pumpkin soup. Paul gave you a smile when you came in and beckoned you with his forefinger to come closer. You did, and the priest held out a spoon full of soup, holding his hand underneath so as not to spill any on the floor. “Careful, it’s hot,” he said with that low husky voice of his. You blew on the spoon a little bit and then accepted it into your mouth.

“What do you think?” he asked after you’d swallowed. “Mhmm,” you murmured appreciatively, “I think I’m going to kiss the cook.” And you did just so, earning a chuckle in the process and a warm hand took a hold of your face. After a little while of slow kissing, you parted from your lover: “I’ll go wash up real quick, we’ll have the delicious supper you made, then try on some costumes, what do you say?” “Sounds great,” he grinned and turned back to the stove to turn it off and plate the soup up. You had a few possible costumes and they were currently hanging in the bedroom of the rectory. Some parts of them were rented, some were bought, some were put together with what you had on hand.

Before father Paul could reach any of them though, he felt two points of something sliding against his temples, lower and lower, ceasing to move right above his sideburns. A headband of some sort. “Aww…” you cooed, “I was right, you do look adorable! Father Meow-Meow!” “No way,” he laughed, as you led him towards the bathroom mirror. “You don’t really think this is adorable, do you?” he asked in good humour, feeling just a little ridiculous, as he stared at himself in the mirror, two fluffy cat ears on the sides of his head. “But I do!” you promised, curling your arms around his torso from behind and resting your chin against his shoulder. Father Paul reached up to remove the cat ears and plopped them on your head instead.

“You should wear them, you look adorable,” he chuckled then. “Oh, I am your little kitten, aren’t I?” you purred, giving a little lick to the skin of his neck. Paul chuckled once more and put his arms against your own, still around his waist. A few minutes passed, before you too took off the headband. “Alright, alright, no catboy priest for Halloween,” you grumbled dramatically, “we’re keeping this, though.” “Come on,” he beckoned you, “let’s try the actual costumes.”

It was a fun evening. One by one father Paul tried on various costumes and allowed you to use some make-up and face paint on him to go with them. Black kohl around his dark eyes, a little grime on his cheek and a little scar for the pirate costume, which consisted of a loose white shirt with a lace up collar, dark blue waist sash with a big leather belt, loose dark trousers and high boots. The pièce de résistance was the long dark waistcoat and a faux-leather tricorn hat. There was no unnecessary kitsch or untasteful accessories. You had to admit, Paul looked very very handsome in the ensemble. “Well?” he asked, turning around a little. “I’d say you could kidnap, and ravage, and don’t give a hoot me anytime, captain,” you said cheekily with a wink, “no, really. It looks great, honestly. If you need to, you can always take off the waistcoat and hat, and it won’t lose any of its magic, so that’s a plus. More important is how you feel wearing it?”

Paul and you discussed all pros and cons of every costume. You persuaded him to at least try on the vampire costume you rented, and after some exaggeration of his cheekbones and eye sockets with more makeup, even he had to agree he made for an okay looking sucker. ‘Eerily seductive’ you said, actually. You dismissed the angel outfit you picked as an experiment almost immediately. It was obviously sewn for someone shorter than Paul and it fit all wrong. It also somehow just didn’t work with the priest’s dark features.

A fisherman’s costume you put together in the latest Crockett Island fashion fit him perfectly, and he looked… so entirely different. Upon first look, he looked unrecognisable from any other fisherman on the island, with simple chequered shirt and a dark jumper, thick beige overalls going all the way down his long legs, nearly concealing his heavy boots clad feet. The look was completed with a trucker cap on the priest’s head. Except once he moved, it was painfully obvious he was no fisherman. The men of Crockett Island were hardy, toughened by their lives and their work, and Paul was always so mindful in his movements, graceful even, and it oh so clashed with his current clothes.

While you thought the fisherman costume looked very good and convincing, as long as Paul moved a little more heavily, the priest himself was worried that people may see it as mockery of their trade, and the last thing he wanted was to offend his neighbours and friends. In the end, Paul seemed most content about the pirate costume (it was his original idea, after all), and you had to agree it really was the best choice. Nothing extravagant, easy to change to and from and the priest truly wore it well.

“You want to try the entire thing on again, just to be sure?” you teased, putting the discarded costumes aside, so you could sort through them and send back what you rented and borrowed. “I think it’s fine,” grinned Paul, removing the last remnants of make-up from his face with a cotton pad. He was standing in front of the bathroom mirror, clad only in the pyjama bottoms he put on after undressing the last costume. “Besides,” he said, “it’s getting quite late. We should turn in.” You now stood in the door frame of the bathroom, leaning against it and eyeing him appreciatively. After you hadn’t said anything for a while, he gave you a questioning look. You smiled innocently and held out your hand, revealing the cat ears headband once more: “Put them on? Pretty please…”

—

You stepped under the hot ray of water in the rectory’s shower. You spent like two entire days in your kitchen, preparing various themed party favours. Edible glass shards cupcakes, little chocolate brown recluses, cheese biscuits that looked like skulls and squishy jello eyeballs for the punch were among the many spooky nibbles you prepared just for the celebration. “This is a brown recluse, but if you want a black widow, marry me,” you quoted Christine McConnell to father Paul once, earning an amused scoff and eye roll. She was the one who gave you the inspiration for your snacks, after all.

Speaking of father Paul, you grinned at the tiles in front of you, as you heard the soft click of a door followed by a quiet creak. Then came a rustle of clothes and soon enough the priest pushed back the curtain and stepped right behind you. Without a single sound, long arms wrapped around your waist and a warm body pressed against your back. “Hm,” he purred against your ear, “you smell like a cake shop.” You giggled and put your hands over his: “I wonder why.” He stepped back a bit to put some soap on his hands and began washing your back, gently massaging out the little kinks and knots that formed there during your kitchen work. You sighed in bliss and let him turn you around to face him once he was happy with the result of his work.

You kissed wetly, the hot water cascading down your bodies. You helped wash one another, hair and body, exchanging soft caresses and gentle unhurried kisses throughout. You felt content to enjoy the sensations for a while, after all, nearly everything was done and ready, so you had some time for tenderness. After the shower, you helped Paul get ready in his costume. You applied the kohl around his eyes and made sure his hair was nicely ruffled and wild, while yours was still damp and you sat barefoot, only covered by a fluffy warm towel.

“Aaand, you’re good to go,” you said, looking him up and down appreciatively. He did make for a very good-looking pirate. You were honestly happy with how he turned out, the costume was easy to distinguish, while still looking quite subtle and decent. “Now wait here, I need to get ready,” you winked at him, grabbing the bag with your costume and going to the direction of the bathroom. “What, seriously? You’re still not going to tell me what your costume is?” Laughed the pirate priest. You got behind the bathroom door and only poked your head out, winking at your lover: “It’s a surprise!”

Maybe fifteen minutes later, you looked at yourself in the mirror one last time and smiled. The long red gown felt soft and smooth against your skin, the belt and headpiece shined and sparkled under the golden glow of the lightbulb above. You decided against wearing a golden wig and instead just worked with your natural hair. Your makeup was subtle and only highlighted your features. Taking a deep breath, you turned the light off and stepped out of the bathroom. Father Paul was sitting on the edge of the bed, book in hands. His eyes immediately turned to you and you felt a tingle in your belly upon seeing his reaction.

His eyebrows rose and mouth opened slightly, dark eyes sliding up and down your body and face. He closed the book, not bothering to mark the page he was on, and unceremoniously dropped it onto the mattress beside him. He stood and came closer, a small smile and a faint blush appearing on his face. “Well hello, Princess Buttercup,” he whispered. You giggled quietly and stood on your tippy toes to press a kiss against his upper lip. “Do you like it?” you looked into his eyes coyly. “Mhm,” he murmured, “you look very beautiful… But I’m afraid I look very far from Dread Pirate Roberts.” You gave him a grin and looked down, picking at his loose white shirt carefully: “That’s the point. It would have been too obvious if you did… Now let’s get the party started, what do you say?” Paul gave you a tiniest little laugh as he closed his hands around your own: “As you wish.”

Well, it was one thing after another after that. You and Paul arrived at the rec centre, where there already were a few people. Namely the DJ, who was setting up his equipment at the podium and a few volunteers who too prepared some food and drinks for the festival. There was Annie, in a very tasteful Olive Oyl costume and you chuckled, excited to hopefully see Ed dressed as the spinach obsessed sailor. Dolly made for a very pretty vampire lady, her dark crimson gown with high collar went so well with her thick curly hair. She was currently lighting candles and putting them inside the jack o’ lanterns. To your surprise, Bev was there too, observing the room with mild apprehension. Of course, she wasn’t wearing a costume. While you often had several things you’d like to say to the woman, you really didn’t want to start any argument on such a lovely day. Therefore you put on your friendliest smile and prepared to use your most polite tone as you approached her.

“Good afternoon, Miss Keane, how do you find the decoration?” She looked at you with suspicion, as you normally went out of your way to avoid her. “Well,” she said at last, “I suppose it could be much worse,” she took one more look around. “I hope the rec centre will still be standing in the morning.” “No worries, Miss, father Paul and I will personally see this place being squeaky clean tomorrow.” She gave you a hard look upon hearing the words ‘Father Paul and I’ , and looked as if she wanted to retort with something, but only muttered a quiet ‘Please do’ , before she turned on her heel and walked out. For all the bad traits the woman had, stupidity wasn’t one of them. You didn’t know why she never said anything, why she never did anything to harm you, but it was obvious the woman knew to some extent the relationship between the local priest and the prose writing outsider wasn’t exactly innocent.

Not thirty minutes later, Bev Keane was the last thing on your mind. People finally started arriving and the DJ began playing music, loud enough to hear and possibly dance to in front of the podium, but not loud enough to disturb a normal conversation at the tables. You were surprised to see sheriff Hassan and Ali dressed in costumes as well, as you weren’t sure if muslims were allowed to participate in this particular activity. Asking Hassan (after complimenting on his bandit costume), he explained he was rather unsure himself, but didn’t want to rid Ali of the fun more than anything else. Muslims cannot celebrate Halloween as it is, because that would be a shirk. However, merely dressing up to have fun with friends and neighbours, with the only intent being that - fitting in and having fun - should be okay. Apparently, it’s one of the things muslims are quite divided on.

All in all, it was a nice afternoon and evening. You were able to chat up your friends, actually try some of the goodies you spent so long working on, and even dance a little. You finally drank a glass of wine with Erin. Shared a few sneaky stolen kisses with your pirate. Undid the lace on the upper front part of his shirt after he took off the waistcoat. Stroked his thigh and whispered into his ear, once you were concealed by the darkness of dying candles, words of both love and lust. Smiled at Erin as they left. Little Foot was taken for the night by Annie earlier and the childhood sweethearts too could finally spend an evening and night alone together.

“Well…” said the priest, “do we start cleaning now, or in the morning?” his posture was relaxed, cheeks slightly flushed from both the few drinks he had and the quite suggestive conversations the two of you engaged in the entire evening and he looked so absolutely gorgeous. You observed the room after you bathed it in the fluorescent light from the ceiling. It would take quite a bit to clean up, not to mention getting all of the decor out of there. Considering your options, your gaze fell on the priest once more. The exposed soft skin of his neck and collarbone, his dark eyes that seemed even larger with the kohl outlining them looking right back at you with such devotion, the hunger coursing through them making you shiver in anticipation... The cleaning would have to wait, as in that moment, there was nothing else you craved more than being kidnapped and made love to by a pirate. Thankfully, the pirate had similar ideas.

—

It was just after 3 o’clock in the afternoon by the time Paul and you finished cleaning the rec centre. Some decoration was stored for following years, the jack o’lanterns were placed all over the town, food leftovers delivered among neighbours and friends. You kept your promise, everything was squeaky clean and no one would have guessed there even was a party not 24 hours ago. You and your lover, once more clad in his usual clerical shirt, warm cardigan and delightfully tight skinny jeans, walked hand in hand through the little forested area behind the church, heading for your home. In just a few hours, the neighbourhood kids (and teens) would be trick-or-treating around the small town. And you - you’ll be happily cuddled next to your priest on a couch, watching a horror film and stuffing your mouths with some sweets.

If there was a holiday you absolutely loved, it was Halloween

wellp, there you have it, folks. I hope it wasn’t too terrible. Hopefully it’s the end of my writer’s block. As always, you can read this story and the entire series on AO3. I’m such a sucker for feedback, I could very well be a vacuum cleaner.

#father paul x reader #father paul #father paul hill #midnight mass #fanfiction #midnight mass fanfiction #father paul x you #reader insert #lovey-dovey idiots #halloween #halloween fanfiction #im sorry if its rubbish #i promise to be better

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httpiastri · 7 months

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Oscar will get his gp win before lando. lando will not even be able to hold max off to convert this pole to a win like oscar was able to. this will just confirm who the better driver for wins and championships is.

i’m gonna start off my saying that i was a lando fan before i was an oscar fan and i love love love lando with all of my heart, just like i do with oscar. none of this is anything personal against any of the boys!!

i don't really feel qualified to say something good about this because my memory is really bad. i do not remember what i had for lunch yesterday. however, i think it's important to remember that there were some differences between the grids in the sprints of qatar and brazil. i think that, if we forget about the difference in tracks and temperature and tire deg and whatnot, it makes quite a lot of difference for max to be starting p2 instead of p3 – especially being p3 and having carlos and george on the softs driving past him in like one second.

in qatar, max dropped back and had to fight with a lot of other drivers, while oscar could pull away at least a bit. he got overtaken by george, but kept cool and when george's tires weren't good anymore, he had no problem keeping the lead. of course, oscar managed several good restarts after the safety cars, but he wasn't really under any pressure from behind, except for george (right? do i remember this correctly? i really apologize otherwise). BUT max was catching up towards the end and he probably would've been able to go past if there had been more laps, both considering how oscar has been struggling with his tires, & the power of the red bull....

but this weekend, max had a good start and then that was it. he didn't have anyone fighting him or holding him back.

i don't think i came to any conclusion here, but maybe the conclusion is that it's not just that easy to compare oscar's sprint pole to lando's. i think that any kind of conclusions rn are hard tbh since the red bull is so insanely good. the only thing i know is that lando is fast as fuck (check out his position in the standings, he spent so many rounds fighting for the bottom points and now he has SEVEN podiums???) and oscar is doing so so well as a rookie too. i'm super excited for the future of mclaren and our boys <3

#this answer is very late and im sorry!!#i just havent had time to properly answer it #idk what even this answer is #im exhausted #and im sorry if im just talking rubbish #i still have the f1 analysis capabilities of a 4-year-old #its more fun to focus on how pretty the boys are than what degree the tires need to be 🤪#asks!#anon!

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rottenautopilot · 2 years

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Unfortunately my tablet cable broke AGAIN but now that I have a camera at hand I can resort to traditional art

These ain't great cuz I haven't drawn on paper in like over a month but! Wanted to draw these guys cuz I like em a lot

#the last one is super messy im rlly not used to paper lmao #also sorry its super faint the lighting in my room is rubbish #pokemon #pokemon dppt #gym leader volkner #elite four flint #art #shitpost #sketch #volkner #flint

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gingerbreadmonsters · 9 months

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ginger, cracking an eyelid and thinking about opening requests for a little bit? its more likely than you think 👀👀

#redacted asmr #i never say it in as many words but my askbox is almost always open 🥳🥳#to be honest i am rubbish at actually filling reqs so its probably not a good idea #im so fucking picky about what to write and the kinds of things that appeal to me #plus like....... most reqs that come in tend to be for things that im either not great at and/or dont particularly vibe with yk #its nobodys fault that writing david feels like pulling teeth its just the way it is you get me #hence why in my pinned it makes it clear that i take Suggestions rather than Requests #thing is i could do reqs or we could do like another ask game or smth #yeah another issue w me and reqs is that my little goblin brain just CANNOT stay on track and it fucks me up Every Time 😭😭#the prompt will be like 'uhhhh elliott sunshine beach day fluff uwu' and i will get 100 words in and #think 'wait what if they were actually dead/imprisoned/doomed the whole time that would be so fun' and then thats all i can write #i mean i started what was SUPPOSED to be DAMN crew cute halloween fluffy stuff and all of a sudden they're all dead so #not a great track record on my part #i cant stand a close plan there has to be room for improvisation #which is awkward when someone has asked for smth specific 🫣🫣#ginger rambles #oh also anon is off bc i am not putting up with any more ridiculous horseplay in my inbox no sir #fuck around in my askbox and..... actually don't find out bc surprise! i deleted it already sorry who are you again

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crabussy · 2 years

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you guys would not believe the convo I just had with some of the sys (sunny, circe, moon, phoebe, francis, martin and jon)

we were in the living room of headspace discussing what stuff we should do while on holiday and a fucking. disembodied brain??? floats into the middle of the room??? and just hovers there and we're all freaked the fuck out and it just. becomes a full nervous system and them it has muscles and skin and clothes and boom. it was phoebe. WHAT THE FUCK. WHY WOULD SHE. WHAT. WHY.

turns out she was just having fun fucking with the dream-physics of headspace. later in the convo she was suddenly an autism creature after a brief confetti explosion and then she turned her hair into hatsune miku's hair. wtf is wrong with this girl. also british people (jon and martin) joined the convo and started being GAY IN FRONT OF ALL OF US. GROSS (it was cute actually)

#it was a good convo!!! today is a good day in the system ((: everyones getting along for once and things arent as fuzzy as usual :D #jon and martin were being GAY. moon was just Sitting There. phoebe butted in a lot but its ok we love her #circe is actually much wilder than I thought??? I'm not too close with her but I assumed she wasn't that silly but turns out shes bonkers #I underestimated your clownery circe. im sorry #also I get!! really nervous talking about this on main! because I've had really scary rubbish encounters with fakeclaimers in the past etc #so I kinda feel anxious when talking about the positive parts of being part of a system #because everyone on r/fakedisordercringe believes that plurality is a traumatic nightmare 100% of the time )):#its hard!! its REALLY difficult and sucky being a system.#of course it is we're 24 people sharing one body and 23 of us can't even be acknowledged #etc etc. it sucks its a disorder #BUT its also just an alternate way of existing as a human!! we have fun we make friends we make fun of each other and have good times.#mostly.#WOW. RANT. OOPS. but I just want to say that I want to share my experiences as part of a nutty crew of morons... a ragtag band of misfits..#I want to show you guys the positives. try and destigmatise this bitch!!!!! the negatives are there too and I will talk about them sometime #but for now. this was a really fun convo and I wanted to share it #robin shut up challenge #not gonna tag this as anything because I don't want anons telling me I'm making stuff up.#please trust me I've been told that dozens of times you really don't need to tell me #my professional psychiatrist/therapist believes I am a system. you are a stranger on the internet who has never met me. please refrain from #sending anons fakeclaiming #WOW I AM NERVOUS TODAY BOYS #dont be surprised if this post disappears

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aprilias · 2 years

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Can Simon Patterson stfu about this “Vietti was the Moto2 rider that would’ve deserved to go up AND NOW look at him” bullshit… like have you seen some people who have been promoted in the past and how inconsistent they’ve been until they got to the premier class? (Not saying he deserves it this year at all, especially after the last rounds but really?)

Like the man isn’t in the title fight anymore, and he’s not fighting for a MotoGP seat anymore so can we just leave him alone and let him get on with it? They talk about him losing his confidence all the time yet no one ever seems to have a good thing to say about him at all. Just let him be and stop with this sensationalism stuff that shouldn’t even exist anymore cause his championship fight and the 2023 grid are set.

#like im sorry the current motogp world champion had one of the most inconsistent junior careers before the premier class #now look at him #the argument is rubbish and its just a pile on at this point #im so glad he doesn’t have twitter honestly #like not being funny right he is literally threatening no one rn and hes still one of the most spoken about just stop it #also apologies if this is incoherent i just needed to rant really #but yeah in short fuck off and leave him alone :)#moto2 lb

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yuikomoriemo · 4 months

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So I'm making a headcanon list-

Pls don't judge

DIABOLIK LOVERS HEADCANONS (MORE WILL BE ADDED)

Since ayato plays basketball as a hobby reiji always scolds him to go for a shower-

Kanato has tea parties with his wax figures,teddy and sometimes forces ayato and laito to be there and dress them up.

Subarus called the police once on reiji(for being irritating)and actually got him arrested- boy- grounded a week-

Ayato likes playing with yuis hair but won't admit it.

Kou has once been accused of homophobia and Queerbaiting but- he retaliated by kissing subaru infront of his possible fans.

Subaru only plays roblox to bully brats offline

Reiji had NO CLUE how to use a Samsung,iPhone,galaxy, NONE AND IT TOOK SHU AND SUBARU MONTHS TO TEACH HIM/ they regretted it because REIJI....HAS A FACEBOOK PAGE

(reijis posts would be about his interest in chemistry which is adorable BUT....HE POSTS CRINGY PHOTOS OF HIMSELF AND ON MORE THAN ONE OCCASION POST HIM PRANKING SHU-)

Yui always makes cookies for the family but as for kanato and ayato.....STALE COOKIES

Cordelia loves watching RuPauls drag race

I think laito is secretly a tik tok sensation

Kanato expects reiji to cook him chocolate cake and sometimes yuma BUT THAT RESULTS IN KANATO CRYING IN A CORNER

The only social media subaru has (apart from MYSPACE) IS TWITTER

Kou sometimes feeds on his fans during concerts for effect (such as his song DEVILS SPIRE)

Shu plays minecraft with yui

Ruki is secretly reading Fifty Shades Of Grey-

Azusa does things to annoy his brothers on purpose so that he'd get hit-

Beatrix always made shu do the little lad dance if he wanted to go out.

Cordelia made kanato do the little lad dance if he wanted candy-

Whenever reiji goes shopping he MUST take kanato even though kanato always wants something but never ever gets it and throws a tantrum.

Karl heinz listens to abba-

Subaru and yuma are hardcore Marliyn manson fans-

Come on- Laitos been to a gay bar at least more than twice lol

Reiji goes to AA meetings (he's a wine/vodka mom-)

Yui had a goth phase at one point and hates to admit it.

Azusa likes to sing when he's alone (The masochism tango-)

Kanatos favourite music artist is Melianie Martenz

Ayato will NEVER ADMIT IT BUT....he had a Justin Bieber phase

Reiji watches full house

Kou and laitos favourite show is Desperate Housewives (laitos reason- let's just say the letters M i l and f) (kous reason- DRAMA)

Subaru made yui watch Moral Orel (ITS A GOOD SHOW BUT- VERY...VERY...DARK)

Yui once asked kanato to wear a dress she bought just out of curiosity

Ayato makes homophobic jokes- (I like dark humour bit that guy would take it to far-))

Subaru paints his nails black

Kanato 100% has BPD

I think yui attempted to murder the sakamakis once in her life-

Kou makes his brothers practice his dances for an upcoming concert.

Yui is a cat person (as in she prefers cats as pets)

Some related to my lgbtq headcanons reiji would've been 100% homophobic in the past

Karlheinz has an onlyfans- (IM SORRY-)

Kanato forces ayato to dress up

Yumas "sugar cubes" are actually just weed mixed with sugar-

Reiji always does the triplets homework assignments

Ayato has tried numerous occasions to make takoyaki for yui since she always makes it.

Azusas music taste is heavy metal-

Laito loves rose bubble baths

Every weekend reiji makes the triplets go out and takes their phones to snoop but immediately gives them back SCARED OF THE THINGS HE SAW (subaru and shu pay their own phone bill- maybe the triplets should do the same-)

Laito loves McDonald's chicken nuggets

Reiji laughs at the idea of gentle parenting (CLAY PUPPINGTON I TELL YA-)

If cordelia was alive she'd totally be the heartthrob on vogue magazine-

When christa is in a good state of mind subaru takes her out to a cafe just to chat.

Reiji always says fiction is rubbish BUT THE NEXT MINUTE HES WATCHING HOWLS MOVING CASTLE WITH YUI-

Beatrix used to make reiji read silly books despite his intellect such of "history of walnuts"

Cordelia whenever she wasn't a heartless bitch to her kids she'd read them bedtime stories from brothers grimm-

If reiji was a dad he'd TRY HIS BEST TO TREAT THEM BOTH THE SAME-

Subaru likes to bring stray cats in his room if they wander in the mansion (Let's see how long that lasts with clean freak reiji-)

Reiji sometimes ONLY SOMETIMES...covers shu up in a blanket when he's sleeping on the couch

Sakamaki Anime

Shu: Kiss him not me

Reiji: Howls moving castle

Laito: ....HELLSING ULTIMATE for the wrong reasons-

Kanato: Junji Ito collection

Ayato:NARUTO

Subaru: YURI ON ICE

Kou follows Harry styles on insta to get fashion tips of his posts for upcoming concerts-

Yui cut subarus hair one time ...PHHHHHHHH....IT DIDNT GO WELL...

Karl used to make the triplets play jenga for 2 hours straight just to entertain himself with their arguments.

Yuma once gave yui his SUGAR CUBES....she wanted more it felt better than being bitten 4752226775444 times A DAY

OK SO...The wedding night- cordelia totally got drunk on purpose and slapped her bridemaids for staring at Karl and then sobbed when Karl yelled at her-

Laito once bought edible-(stuff I can't say but you can guess-) AND FORGOT ABOUT IT ONE TIME ONLY TO HAVE REIJI SMACK THE SHIT OUT OFF HIM WHEN HE FOUND IT

Ayato and subaru sometimes team up to annoy laito

Ok- this one might be offensive so I apologise in advance, on many occasions reiji would be absolutely pissed after having a jehova witness at the mansion door

Beatrix tried cordelias wine and they both ended up actually getting along for once

@yuma-mukami-garden-god @notdiabolika @diabolikpersonals

#diabolik lovers #anime and manga #kanato sakamaki #kou mukami #yuma mukami #laito sakamaki #diabolik lovers ask blog #diabolik lovers memes #ayato sakamaki #azusa mukami #reiji sakamaki #sakamaki subaru #diabolik lovers headcanons #headcanons

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fangisms · 11 months

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did you hear?

A/N: i just think he’s so lover.

gif creds: @qveenofthorns

Pairings: Neville Longbottom x Popular!Fem!Reader

Summary: Neville Longbottom accidentally starts a raunchy rumor about the popular girl in his potions class. And rumors fly. 1.0k words.

Warnings: ‘snogging’ help im not british and it shows, rumors, allusions to sex/promiscuous acts, teasing, pining, strangers/friends to lovers

Somehow Neville started a rumor about you. And somehow, through the unbelievably slippery walls of Hogwarts, the rumor made its way to you in less than a week.

It was an accident, honestly. And people kept blowing it way out of proportion. You were popular, more popular than he could ever hope to be, and when he said it, he had already accepted that nothing would ever really happen between the two of you. But this awful rumor made him sound boorish and borderline rabid when really it was supposed to be a harmless confession between friends.

"I heard Neville Longbottom wants to shag you out by the Quidditch pitch."

Even from a few tables down, he could see the mortification fall over your face like a black veil. Your friend giggled as she pulled away from whispering in your ear, and you clapped a hand over your mouth. He had to look away when your eyes flicked to meet his. Your friends spend the rest of lunch hour teasing you and snickering about him while you seem to shrink in on yourself.

Neville manages to avoid you where he can in the halls: taking the longer route, hiding in large groups. But none of it is very fruitful when you've got a very similar class schedule. In fact, despite his efforts, he spends nearly every passing period just behind you and sometimes even right beside you. Apparently, he's also got a clear shot of you from where he sits in the classes you share and you're even table mates in potions. Of course, he knew all of this before that nasty rumor was spread, he's just become hyperaware of it since then.

After making it through the week without too much tension, he finds himself scanning the pages of his Water Plants textbook in the Great Hall and not retaining any of the information. And as he props his chin in his hand, he notices you settle into the seat directly across from him, flashing him a quick smile before opening your own book.

He sits up, glancing around the room to find Snape preoccupied with a group of raucous students from Slytherin.

A small, crumpled piece of parchment rolls its way to your side of the table, stopping just before it topples over the edge. You set your book in your lap and look over your shoulder before unraveling the torn paper.

"I'm assuming you've heard the news by now."

A smile creeps onto your face as you flatten out the slip of paper and write your own message on the backside. You slide it across the table and just barely catch his eye.

"Here and there."

But he knows you mean just about every five seconds because this cursed rumor has been inescapable for as long as its existed. You slide the cover of the Hogwarts Gazette over as well. It's entitled, "Things Heat Up Between Popular Witch and Nerdy Wizard" just above a picture of the two of you smiling at each other in class with a few smaller headlines like, "The Rumors are True!" and "What's Next for the Unlikely Couple?"

He blinks. Who's reading this rubbish? Scratch that, who's writing this rubbish and how hard would it be to mame them?

"I'm sorry about that, it was supposed to be an inside joke. Honestly, I would never say something that awful in the first place. And especially not about you."

You give him a sympathetic smile and crumple the page and his note into a ball before sending back a new slip.

"I know."

He half-smiles before attempting to read again. But you toss him another scrap of paper.

"So what did you say then?"

You giggle when he flushes a bright pink before squinting at you and scribbling across the page.

"Something or other about wanting to snog a certain pretty girl. It was never meant to go past first base, honestly. Pure intentions!"

You shove the used paper in your pocket and glance over your shoulder with a mischievous look before delicately folding another piece and setting it in the center of his textbook. He opens it. But he doesn't get the chance to read it before it's snatched out of his grasp by a pale hand.

"Mr Longbottom," Snape drawls, "would you care to read this aloud since you two have insisted on interrupting your fellow students' focus?"

You hide your giggles behind your hand and Neville glares at you while Snape ushers him into the aisle.

He looks down the note and groans.

"How about those Quidditch Pitch seats?"

...

"Very funny," Neville grumbles while you hold his shoulder to steady yourself from convulsing with laughter.

"Your face! You should have seen your face!" You tease, tears nearly streaming down your face when you clutch the sleeve of his sweater.

"You set me up," he says, trying not to smile when you purse your lips.

"You started a rumor about me!"

"On accident."

You cross your arms over your chest and tilt your head to the side. "Then yes. I set you up. On accident. Walk me to Trelawney's?"

He rolls his eyes and offers his arm for you to loop yours through. You walk beside each other in silence nearly half the way, dodging confused looks and bothersome jeers from your friends.

"So," you mumble, looking at him with a cocked brow, "you really think I'm pretty?"

Neville shrugs. "And snoggable, I suppose."

He looks down at you and thinks he's never acted so cool around someone he likes so much. He thinks you're more than pretty and he wants to be able to tell you, but as you round the corner, the open classroom leers at you like a slippery snake. He spares you one last look and you peer up at him like a little dove. He goes pink.

You stop in the doorway and beckon him closer. And you think the nearly contemptuous smile on his face is new and ill-fitting but he's handsome nonetheless. You hold his chin and press a sweet kiss to his cheek before ducking into the classroom.

"See you in potions, Neville."

masterlist

#strangers to lovers #friends to lovers #fluff #fanfic #hp universe #x reader #neville longbottom #neville longbottom x reader #neville longbottom fanfic #neville longbottom x fem!reader #x fem!reader #neville longbottom fluff #neville longbottom x y/n #popular!reader #x popular!reader

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ginevrapng · 7 months

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Hiii<3 im sorry, can you write something about george? I dont know, something sweet? I feel like he is like that, and i miss him so much and i love your writing so i kinda wanted to ask for that, it is totally okay if you dont do it!! Just want to say i love your writings<3 they made me feel like im living your stories, its just soo good<3 oh and sorry for my english it's not my first language

hi<33 hopefully you like this! i decided to write a sweet best friend to lovers with george. i love him so much and i feel like this trope fits him really well. {contains slight angst but blink and you'll miss it

i'm really glad you like my writing, i love to hear that it! your english is really good by the way<3

george weasley is your best friend. you met at hogwarts in your second year and by your fifth year your feelings for your best friend were less than platonic. it's frustrating being in love with your best friend, you know it's wrong and he doesn't think of you that way but at the same time you don't really blame yourself george is amazing and it's no wonder you fell for him.

george loves you and it's so obvious to everyone, at least everyone that isn't you. george is sweet and kind but with you he takes it to another level yet you're so oblivious. he's your best friend of course he's going to be more touchy with you, right?

george always pulls you towards when you're walking down corridors together, he puts his arms around you and brings you to his side when you're sitting next to each other but in your eyes it's just george being comfortable around you. he even kisses you cheek and forehead and you brush it off. george is incredibly tender with you, holding your hand gently and complimenting you everyday. "you look very pretty today love" and "another o? you're so clever sweetheart." you think those affectionate nicknames are just between best friends though, you do call him georgie when the only other person who does so is fred.

he spends his spare time with you and makes time for you between pranking. george loves it when you help him with his pranks by giving him ideas, he knows you typically try to stay away from getting properly involved worried that you'll get into trouble but he loves when you praise him about how brilliant his pranks are and how creative he is. george always makes sure that fred doesn't prank you, the last time fred pranked you was in their third year and george was pissed off, not wanting to talk to him for days. it was a harmless prank but he didn't want you to be the target of their pranks.

george comforts you whenever you need it, sometimes you can get emotional and he'll be your support. if classes are getting you down he'll be there next to you, holding you in his arms after class while you lay on his bed while he tells you about how rubbish the teacher is and how stupid the subject is, "don't let it get you down sweetheart, so what if you got a d in astronomy? sinistra is just terrible, she's even worse than snape." you knew he didn't think that but it still brought you comfort.

if someone says something mean to you they'll suffer with some harsher prank. when he overheard zacharias smith talk bad about you he made him pay the next quidditch match the gryffindors had with hufflepuffs, george focuses more on aiming any bludgers towards smith than any other hufflepuff.

george knew you'd always be friends, no matter how many hints he gave, you'd only see him as your best friend. sometimes he thinks he has a shot when he swears he sees you look at him the way he looks at you but he dismisses it. he's happy to be your best friend and he hopes that however you end up will treat you well, just as long as you don't end up liking... "i can't help it, i know i should be trying to get over him but i love him so much." he hears your voice. "he's just perfect, he's so sweet and always looks after me. he's so good at quidditch and he's so popular... i know i don't have a chance. his red hair is so hot and i lay in bed at night thinking about his lips." george hears the laughter of your friends and his heart breaks.

you deserve to be happy, you do, but the one person he wishes you didn't fall for was his twin. george feels like everyone prefers fred, george has felt second best all his life and at the end of the day george is insecure and you're one of the only person who knows this. he goes to leave not wanting to hear anything else you have to say. "he's my best friend." george immediately stops, "i mean it's george bloody weasley. he's amazing and i'm just me." george grins and he's so glad he took his time walking away before you carried on speaking.

at dinner that night he comes up to you and whispers in your ear, "come to the room of the requirement later love." you nod your head and later on you're worried that you'll get caught out of your common room after hours but you trust george and you'll risk getting into trouble if it meant spending time with him. when you arrive to the room of requirements you're shocked by the display. george has set up a midnight feast with hot chocolate for you both to warm you up, a blazing fire, a big comfy sofa and big bed. basically a big room where you can relax for the night with george. "this is amazing georgie."

george's heart is beating incredibly fast as goes to stand next to you. "i'm so glad you think so." you see pink dusting his cheeks and wonder if the room is too warm for him. he gently picks up your hand and places it on his chest where you can feel his racing heartbeat. your eyes widen as you get worried but before you can ask him if he's okay he starts speaking. he cups your cheek in his his hand, "i love you," he presses a soft kiss on your lips causing you to gasp at his confession.

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borathae · 12 days

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Chapter 16

OH MY GOD WE ARE NOT DEAD YAY HOBI

WHERES KOOK???? HIS BACK????

okay this was like the calmest reaction to me being a vampire I have ever seen. hobari, my love, tae already told her thats why she is chill

I once had a girl literally run away from me screeching prayers.” xd HAHA imagine someone pulling out the cross at him and saying THE POWER CHRIST COMPELS YOU and him just blinking

hobi baby, ik your are excited, but its quite the wrong time and person to test your new skills

“No, I’m not like Jungkook. I don’t go crazy at the smell or taste of blood. Especially not when yours tastes like literal ass right now, wow thanks ig

holy shit no baby kook, im gonna fucking cry DONT PUNISH YOURSELF YOU SAVED US BOTH FUCK IM ALL TEARY EYES

I’m just waiting for the day when vampire hunters break through the front door and shoot you guys.” im imagining them coming in fbi style FBI OPEN UP WE KNOW ITS SANGUIS hobi's cute dumbass - how did u know seokjin- you just proved it

this is why she isnt scared of you both 😭😭😭 reminds me of that tiktok asking whose house will you rob and everyone straight up said hobi in the comments 💀

imagine someone seeing their bodies in front of the house also was it tae or yoongi or someone else??

ok hobi was 26 in 1982, so born in 1956 and is 68 so its 2024 hmm SO KOOK IS 94 WTF they are not even dilf, they are gilf 😭😭😭 wait in that case whats tae 😭 hold on jimin mentioned yoongi being older, is that in older than 800 years or turned at an older age?

I was turned in 1875 by some random prostitute”, bitch pls 😭😭😭 he doesnt have a sob story nor a heroic one

wait something doesnt add up jin is 217, so if its 2024, he should be born in 1807, but he was 27 in 1875

“Good that you ask because listen this is such a story”, ..“Oh god here we go again stop being a jealous bean just cuz u got turned by a hoe 😭😭

“Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. With that massive schlong that I carry around” you say sarcastically. you sure about that? was that foreshadow to the oneshot lol

“She bit my neck!” “And she bit my dick!” one got their throat ripped out and other ones dick. great just great. i just know, no vampire has a story like this, i mean sure neck being bitten but from a prostitute?? and dick being bitten hobi im sorry but thats a tragic comedy

A bang then a clash. bro this scared me so bad only to see its “Stupid raccoon don’t run away, come on let me spank your rubbish stealing buttocks!”

whats calling her?? where is she going?? who is down there calling? 2seokook wont have something suspicious down there right?

daisies and fresh sheets? is that jungkook? why is he down there? wtf HOW DID THE DARK CORRIDOR TURN BRIGHT???

damn how hard did he hurt himself this is so heartbreaking let me get my blanket 😭

As long as I’m paralysed I’m no danger to you NO STOP whos cutting onions

OMG SHE KISSED HIS CHEEK IM BLUSHING LIKE IM THE ONE WHO GOT KISSED AAAH

WHERES KOOK???? HIS BACK????

buckle in, that's where the angst begins 😭

okay this was like the calmest reaction to me being a vampire I have ever seen. hobari, my love, tae already told her thats why she is chill

Hobari gosh :( I miss them all together </3

I once had a girl literally run away from me screeching prayers.” xd HAHA imagine someone pulling out the cross at him and saying THE POWER CHRIST COMPELS YOU and him just blinking

JJADSFJ tbfh it's so valid though JFADJSJF

hobi baby, ik your are excited, but its quite the wrong time and person to test your new skills

FADSHJFJ HE IS SO CHAOTIC BAHAHHAH

“No, I’m not like Jungkook. I don’t go crazy at the smell or taste of blood. Especially not when yours tastes like literal ass right now, wow thanks ig

hhiihih he is so good in flirting hhiihih

holy shit no baby kook, im gonna fucking cry DONT PUNISH YOURSELF YOU SAVED US BOTH FUCK IM ALL TEARY EYES

I'M CRYING IN THE CLUB

imagine someone seeing their bodies in front of the house also was it tae or yoongi or someone else??

WHOOO KNOWWSSS not me (i know)

OKAY BEAR IN MIND!!!! I wrote this story in 2020 so it takes place in 2020. You have to subtract 4 years of their age during Sanguis Alpha. Also as far as your Yoongi question is concerned, we do not know yet what exactly he meant 👀

I was turned in 1875 by some random prostitute”, bitch pls 😭😭😭 he doesnt have a sob story nor a heroic one

fjajdfadjs he is so pathetic jfdajsf

wait something doesnt add up jin is 217, so if its 2024, he should be born in 1807, but he was 27 in 1875

Nooo it takes place in 2020 queen <3 no wait. WAIT my bisexual ass did the maths wrong HELP!!!! thanks for pointing it out I need to change the dates jfdjsjf

“Good that you ask because listen this is such a story”, ..“Oh god here we go again stop being a jealous bean just cuz u got turned by a hoe 😭😭

oh sweet summer child if only you knew jfdjsf

“Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. With that massive schlong that I carry around” you say sarcastically. you sure about that? was that foreshadow to the oneshot lol

BESTIE THE DOTS ARE CONNECTING FJDSJF

aahhaha they're so chaotic I love them fjadjf

whats calling her?? where is she going?? who is down there calling? 2seokook wont have something suspicious down there right?

the suspicionn

daisies and fresh sheets? is that jungkook? why is he down there? wtf HOW DID THE DARK CORRIDOR TURN BRIGHT???

THE SUSPICION

damn how hard did he hurt himself this is so heartbreaking let me get my blanket 😭

i'm crying so hard 😭

As long as I’m paralysed I’m no danger to you NO STOP whos cutting onions

LIKE PLEASE 😭😭😭

OMG SHE KISSED HIS CHEEK IM BLUSHING LIKE IM THE ONE WHO GOT KISSED AAAH

THEY'RE SO CUTUUTUTEEEE

#asks: sanguis alpha #asks #minusback #tw: long post

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athena-writes-i-guess · 1 year

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#32

hiyaa! ive sent in requests to so many accs but no ones replied idk wether they are busy or not but anyways, i was wondering if you could do a #32 where y/n and eddie have secretly liked eachother for years but eddie always annoys y/n by flirting with her even though gareth is her brother. one day corroded coffin are practicing in y/ns garage whilst shes watching tv eddie comes in and start’s annoying her and flirts a little saying “y’know you love it” and all that shii. she starts to get angry and tells him to stop cuz its not fair on gareth if anything happened and but eddie being eddie just keeps pushing until eventually they kiss. gareth can walk in on them if you would like to add that i dont mind :) sorry if it was a rubbish explanation im terrible at writing stuff lol. thank you 💗

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Gareth sister!Reader

Prompt: "How mad would you be if I kissed you?"

A/N: Hello friend! Thank you so so much for this super fun request! I had a blast writing this! I think it's made me want to explore more sibling!reader x Eddie fics! I really hope that this came out the way you wanted and that you like it as much as I do! Thank you so much!

You were sitting sideways out of your open driver's side door reading a book as your Iron Maiden cassette played loudly out of your car's speakers. You sighed as you checked your watch and tapped your foot in annoyance. They were late again.

You’re Gareth’s older sister, you had graduated 2 years ago but you helped out by picking up him and some of his friends from school everyday after your shifts at work. Today was Hellfire night so you knew it was a late night, but they should have been out 15 minutes ago. You sighed again. Gareth would owe you big if he made you wait any longer, you were doing him a favor after all. You’d make him do your chores for the rest of the week if he didn’t show up in the next 5 minutes and just the thought brought a small smile to your face.

“A beautiful smile on a beautiful girl.” You heard from right in front of you. You jumped and let out a startled gasp at the noise, causing the person to laugh. You looked up and found Eddie Munson.

Your heart was thundering in your chest, you’d be lying if you said that it was just from the surprise. You had harbored a crush on Eddie ever since the 8th grade, having been in the same class with him since kindergarten. But the two of you had run in different circles and you never thought he would be interested in you. Hell, he had barely even started talking to you until Gareth joined his D&D campaign as a freshman.

You had no idea though, that Eddie had been too nervous to talk to you until the day you walked into the drama room to pick up your little brother that first time. He had thought you were beautiful and way too smart for him and never thought he’d get a reason to speak to you, all until Gareth. Now he made it a point to talk to you any chance that he could. After school when you picked up your brother, at your job at the record shop, at your house during Corroded Coffin practices. He made it his goal every time.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you, sweetheart.” He chuckled, dimples on full display.

“It’s okay, Munson.” You said with a small smile. “Where’s my loser of a brother?” You asked, noticing the other boys we suspiciously absent.

“He had to get something from his locker and Jeff went with him.” Eddie responded, “But how’s the prettiest girl in Hawkin’s doing?” He flirted, you rolled your eyes as you tried to ignore the way your heart skipped a beat at his words. Eddie was a notorious flirt. You wanted to flirt back. But he’s Gareth’s friend and bandmate, you couldn’t do that to him. What if you dated and broke up, and made it uncomfortable for your brother to even have band practice? No you couldn’t do that to him. So you brushed Eddie off every time.

“I don’t know, you should go find her and ask.” You shot back, looking from him back to your book. You heard him tut at your response.

“Come on sweetheart. You know I mean you. When are you gonna let me take you out?” He asked. You looked up at that, that was new. Normally he just flirted, maybe joked about kissing you. But never actually asking you out.

You felt your mouth drop open slightly in surprise, much to Eddie’s amusement. “You know we can’t do that Eddie.” You said simply, gesturing your head towards Gareth as he finally walked out of the school towards your car.

Eddie looked over his shoulder and smiled, “Come on, he won’t mind.” He said as he turned back.

“You don’t know that. We just can’t Eddie.” You sighed. “Hurry up Gareth or I’ll make you do my chores for the rest of the week!” You called, pulling yourself back into the car fully and closing the door. “See you around Eddie.” You said through the open window.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, sweetheart.” He smiled, undeterred.

“See you for practice tomorrow Eddie, good game!” Gareth said as he walked up and opened the passenger door to your car.

“See you all then.” Eddie said with a knowing smile as he backed away from your car, sending you a little wave before putting his hands in his pockets and walking towards his van.

~~~

It was the next afternoon, you had just finished your chores for the weekend and decided to watch a movie in the living room while your parents were out and the boys were practicing in the garage.

They had been going for hours and currently it sounded like Gareth and Jeff were going over a section of the song together, trying to tighten their parts. The door to the garage opened in the kitchen and you turned to look at who it was, sighing when you saw Eddie. He smiled brightly at you as he closed the door and sauntered over, plopping down on the couch right next to you and placing his arm on the couch behind you.

“Afternoon, beautiful.” He beamed with a wink.

“Eddie.” You sighed, determined to ignore him as you stared at the TV.

“How are you doing today, pretty girl?” He asked.

“Fine.”

“You look great today.” He said, “Just like every day.”

“Eddie.” You said in a warning tone.

“That’s my name sweetheart. I love the way you say it.” He cooed as he leaned into you more.

“Eddie, you have to stop.” You said firmly, looking into his eyes. He was much closer than he had ever been before and you’re senses we flooded with him. You could smell his cologne and cigarettes, a combo that normally wouldn’t smell good to you, but for some reason it was intoxicating. His long curls were tickling the exposed skin of your shoulder, causing goosebumps to raise on your body. And you could almost melt under the intense look he was giving you, full of an emotion you couldn’t quite place.

“You know you love it sweetheart.” He said with a sly smile. “I see the way you smile to yourself when you think no one’s looking. You like when I flirt with you.” He said simply, his smile growing wider at the dumbstruck look on your face at being found out. “And I like you. So I’m going to keep doing it, until you kiss me or slap me.”

“I -wha- are you- I-” You tried to start. “I don’t know what you’re talking about Munson.” You finally got out, pulling your eyes away from him and back to the movie as you felt the heat rise to your face. You didn’t want him to know that he was right, you loved when he flirted with you. You wanted to flirt back, but you were trying to be a good sister.

“Yes you do, princess.” He said, raising his hand up to your chin to pull your face to look at him. “Let me take you out. We could be great.”

I furrowed your brows in distress, your resolve crumbling as you tried to be strong. “We can’t!” you hissed quietly. “Think of Gareth. We could hurt him.” You pleaded.

“We won’t. I promise.” He cooed, leaning into you. His lips were so close that you could feel his warm breath on yours. “How mad would you be if I kissed you?” He breathed.

“Pissed.” You breathed. But you leaned in, crashing your lips onto his, eliciting a surprised noise out of the metalhead. Eddie recovered quickly, kissing you back feverishly as he pressed himself into you as he wrapped his arms around you, pulling the two of you close so there was no space between you. You ran your hands through his curls, tugging lightly, causing the brunette to moan into your mouth.

You pulled away, breathless, after a few moments. “We have to stop.” You gasped, you opened your eyes to lock with Eddie’s hooded ones.

“Sure, sure, sweetheart.” He mused with a smile before his lips were on yours again. It was your turn to moan this time as he kissed you hungrily.

You let yourselves get lost in each other, ignoring the world around you as you gave into your feelings for Eddie. All the years of pining for each other led to this. And it felt so good, so right to be like this with him. And for a moment you forgot why you had been avoiding this for so long.

“Fucking finally.” You heard from behind you, followed by a laugh.

You pulled apart with a gasp and spun around in your seat to see Gareth and Jeff standing in the entrance to the living room. You hadn’t even heard the garage door open.

“Honestly it took you long enough.” Gareth teased. “Now will you stop being so weird around each other and just go out?” Your mouth fell open in surprise as you looked between the two boys and Eddie.

“See? I told you he’d be fine, sweetheart.” Eddie laughed, pecking your cheek affectionately.

Taglist: @srapalestina @yvonneeeee @cityofidek @anaisweird @mrslovesmayahawke @harrys-tittie @becca-alexa @catacina

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dirkspanelcollection · 3 months

Text

Every page Eridan Ampora is in.

for your march Eridan editing needs.

+ all his (side of) pesterlogs (for fun)

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Pesterlog from page 2343

CA: kan make her talk to me do somethin

CA: your no good connivvin fuckin backstabbin girl crush thats wwho

CA: pshhhhhh that is a fuckin laugh and you knoww it evveryone does

CA: so help me out tell her to talk to me i think she blocked me you got to CA: wwhatEVVER you are so the vvillage twwo wwheel devvice wwhen it comes to auspisticing

CA: you cant let a grudge go by you wwont stick your busy stem betwwixt so get wwith the program fussyfangs

CA: wwho givves a shit wwhy she blocked me or about my fuckin manners come on youvve got a wway wwith her

CA: i figure if youre going to auspisticize any twwo brinesuckers wwho sneer at each other a funny wway you might as wwell make it official and be ours right

CA: she made me somethin per a prior arrangement

CA: she wwill delivver it wwhen wwe meet in this game but i dont knoww wwhat the logistics are yet

CA: im tryin to connoiter wwith her here but shes blowwin me off again fickle dirtscrapin landhag

CA: kan stupid wwhat do you think its a fuckin gizmo to bloww up the wworld or somethin

CA: ok wwell not that obvviously

CA: but somethin thatll kill all land dwwellers wwhat else wwould i be after

CA: wwell

CA: im not goin to vvery wwell kill you am i that wwould be fuckin unconscionable

CA: wwhat kind of friend wwould i be

CA: yeah go ahead and kiss us off but therell be blood on your hands

CA: you could either play along as our auspistice and do a little mediating like you wwere fuckin hatched to

CA: or wwatch she and me devvolvve into fuckin full fledged kismesisses the kind like you dont get once in ten thousand swweeps

CA: you knoww thats wwhat it wwould be there wwould be rainboww rivvers runnin through star systems and all nebulizin like liquid firewworks

CA: it wwill be beautiful and heartbreaking all at once

CA: you should read up on your history instead of poring through that godawwfull sunny rubbish

CA: yeah it does its important sorry but the fate of the race and purity of the bloodline is important excuse me for being concerned

CA: huh

CA: wwell ok

CA: ordinarily id call bullshit on terrible stinkin bs like that but i knoww you dont really lie about stuff

CA: unless its to yourself

CA: but thats wwhy i bother evven talking to you i wwouldnt evven be here SAYIN any of this otherwwise

CA: so did your clouds tell you that

CA: i got clouds and they dont tell me SHIT they hide nothin but misfortune and monstrosities

CA: fuckin pain in the ass fuckin clouds

CA: so howw do you knoww then

CA: ok wwell you are jacked tight the fuck into this thing in so many wways i dont knoww wwhat to say anymore

CA: wwhatevver wwe wwill just play and find out i guess

CA: so can you tell her to talk to me anywway

CA: god dammit

CA: she and me are teammates wwevve got to havve a powwwwoww or SOMETHING

CA: fuck

CA: fine i get it ill step off

CA: you dont wwant to be our auspistice cause you dont wwant to get locked into that sort of relation wwith her i can respect that

CA: yeah it is your real feelins run pretty awwful RUDDY methinks evverybody knowws it

CA: especially that assblood karkat he and me havve you so pegged about that its upright silly

CA: but its cool its totally fine dont wworry ill leavve you alone and givve you a shot

CA: wwhat

CA: wwhoa wwait wwho

CA: ok wwait did she talk to you today

CA: wwhat did she say

CA: or glub or wwhatevver

CA: WWWWHAT

CA: wwait

CA: did she actually say that

CA: in confidence

CA: can you copy exactly wwhat she said

CA: this is bullshit youre bee essing me in some wway awwful

CA: you dont lie but you do tease and ill tranfuse my kickass royal blood out wwith incontinent musclebeast discharge if i wwont knoww wwhen im gettin hooked

CA: awwww fuck

CA: see im tellin you

CA: you got to play your cards right CA: if youre not savvvvy about howw you define yourself to peopleCA: you can just splash into the moirail zone before you knoww wwhich wways upwwardCA: kan its hard

CA: being a kid and growwing up

CA: its hard and nobody understands

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Pesterlog from page 2446

CA: fef

CA: hey

CA: glub

CA: yeah

CA: hm

CA: wwhat

CA: nothins on my mind wwhy cant i just fuckin talk and glub at you for a reason i dont havve

CA: wwell fine but you dont wwant to hear it CA: uhuh wwhatevverCA: yeah wwell ok since wwe are the PALEST OF PALS A GUY COULD EVVER ASK FOR

CA: i wwill tell you

CA: evven though you wwill only humor me as usual since you dont agree wwith my agenda

CA: any of my agendas really

CA: none of the agendas

CA: none of them

CA: see

CA: more condescension

CA: you are goin to make a hell of an empress

CA: so

CA: i got to keep tryin thats howw all the great military masterminds became great through upright persevverance

CA: it isnt wwrong

CA: im not going to explain it to you again

CA: at this point all you need to knoww is its important to me

CA: and im doing it for us

CA: i mean our kind

CA: nobody understands not evven you

CA: pshh

CA: hemospectrum begs to differ

CA: wwhatevver

CA: i havve to keep an eye on em up here

CA: its all about tactics

CA: history is full of cases wwhere conquerers consort wwith members of the enemy in a mannerly wway before wwipin them out CA: evven goin as far as growwin fond a some

CA: its only civvilized

CA: all your feelins are fishy

CA: GLUBGLUBGLUBGLUBGLUBGLUB

CA: ill glub in wwhatevver dumbass bubbly soundin fishnoise i wwant to glub

CA: ok please lets just not get into the wwhole fuckin fish pun thing again ok

CA: like wwe get it wwe are nautically themed

CA: but yeah i dunno

CA: i dont knoww wwhy she ignores me i guess shes just bored wwith me

CA: wwe had it all set up for her to givve me this thing tonight that probably doesnt evven wwork but yeah maybe that wwasnt the point

CA: i mean you think wwe havve a pretty good rivvalry goin right

CA: or at least had

CA: it wwas pretty fuckin bitter and contentious for a wwhile there and there wwas some good chemistry i dont knoww wwhat happened