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kalims · 10 months

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ㅤdorm leaders being savages

summary. basically some backstabber mf tries to 'steal' him and... this is where the savage part starts

featuring. dorm leaders

content. bad friend, gender neutral reader, brutal rejection 😭

note. a full post after a while :')

malleus

I mean it's not like he would notice anyways, again. I firmly believe human and fae courting traditions are vastly different and c'mon... he doesn't even know what the fuck flirting is do you really think he'd get their intentions. 💀

when they start to slide up an arm in places he's quite bothered about, (cause guy is so whipped that he won't let anyone but him touch you.) he isn't even happy that someone is near his proximity anymore, not scared and whatnot.

just he no likey.

AND HES NOT EVEN TRYING TO BE ROMANTIC HE JUST SHRUGS THEM OFF EVERYTIME. he's just a genuine innocent lil' dude who wants his lover to come and save him from this touchy, weird, human.

no child of man cause that's your name ‼️

while he may not get it, he's got a feeling, sixth sense of sorts and when he sees it he's backing tf up away. he's not gonna entertain the doubts.

also he still doesn't get it in the end lmaoooo, he's avoiding all their advances thinking it's a part of human... culture? that he wasn't made aware of.

if they start putting in the forbidden words in the same sentence as your name you know shits going down, suddenly he's not that confused, oblivious, cute guy that they saw but a much colder shell.

when his eyes darken, and it starts storming they'd had better run, he's been kind enough to stay even with their relentless annoying behavior but that is where he crosses the line fr.

don't even be surprised when they get hit by lightning and end up in the infirmary or something, malleus didn't even say anything to them cause he believes actions speaks louder than words... *sends touchy, weird human to the nurse.* see?

someone insults him: ?

someone insults you: 😠😡🤬👿🌩⚡

just goes: "your friend is very unpleasant, I'd appreciate it if you refrain from spending time with them."

something unsaid; spend all of that time with me duhhh

idia

you know what I'm surprised someone actually likes him tbh 😭 except us because we're all built different and we love disgustang discord mod behavior.

you know what's even more surprising? the fact that idia is actually seen by your friend group. I swear he comes out of his room like once a day and that's just because he's craving something else that isn't in his food stock and he's just gonna rob whose mac n' cheese was in the microwave.

and that's literally in his DORM ONLY.

he's like a vampire and allergic to sunlight, he's more willing to come out in the middle of the night because that's when the least 'normies' are scattered around like flies.

(if that counts for anything at all??)

but hanging out is more fun and if you somehow managed to convince idia to come with you with your friends for some well needed, 'socializing' then you're in luck!

besides that you had to bet one of your items in that open world game you played together... all is good!

im like 99% sure idia is disgusted by any other touch from other people, besides you? cause if you touch him he's just embarrassed... but in terms of the disgusted faction, you've been there before.

he immediately spots their intentions cause he definitely plays otome games and this is one of them cliche scenarios to 'spice up' the plot by invoking jealousy in it.

only difference is its him, you and this... random.

if they weren't already offended by the absolute mortification and disgust on his face, somehow continuing to 'rizz' him up.. oh boy. it's gonna get worse.

he's got the worst fucking 3rd grade insults like... "back away from me you noob, are you supposed to be their friend?" he scoffs, surprising them cause they thought he was gonna be that red flag discord romance experience.

"sorry but im not really sorry. i don't associate myself with lower levels such as yourself, try to come back when you're higher but I doubt they'd accept a fiend back."

LIKE WHO USES NOOB AS AN INSULT?

when you come back he's steering you away, pulling on the hem of your sleeves practically begging to come home with the promise of 'grinding that outrageous drop rate item you've asked his help with.'

something unsaid; doxxing them as soon as I get back

vil

ok this one I get.

who wouldn't want vil... it's not like I've made the entirety of the fandom known about my obsession with him as my favorite character or anything, not at all... jokes aside he's a very prominent candidate, he's hot and rich. you get it?

forget about the other qualities because we all known those two can carry someone in life alone, life in luxury and fame? sign them up ASAP.

besides your boyfriend being one of the superstar actors, models, the dream jobs for a dream man even your friends had a hard time believing you. you should be offended that they even considered that you were clinically.. delusional.

plus you didn't even seem to know about vil before so how are you dating him?!

they found out the hard way and safe to say they're flabbergasted because what even?

of course out of everyone here, vil has the most experience in terms of being approached on a baseless appearance only, he's iffed by how fast people get infatuated when they're barely scratching the surface of him.

well, you somehow dug your way deep with a shovel so you're the only exception he will allow...

at this point he knows what to expect the moment one of your friends gave him a look he's all the well too accustomed to. it's easy to ignore the ones he sees in crowds cause there's always some type of fence blocking them from fully proclaiming their love or something.

problem here is that this person has no obstacles and he can tell they're waiting for an opportunity to strike like a snake. *texts the pomefiore gc to tell them about this SNAKE!*

honey this is a big NO for him, you need to consider your circle of friends if one of them immediately starts folding around like this and wastes what? a longer friendship with you? please, he's known his stylists more and they literally get replaced every single day.

he's giving them the biggest, sassiest side eye ever. putting a palm up before they even get to speak because frankly, he does not want to hear it.

they open their knarly mouth. "i—"

he raises a finger. "no."

a frown. "but i—"

"shush."

he can do this forever.

when you come back he's still giving a bombastic, criminal offensive side eye, mentally thinking on how to ruin this person's life in media of course! his natural domain. just one word and the rest of his army will attack fr.

vil usually doesn't do this but seriously? that was another level of low.

also he's just by your side, you don't even have to say that he's your boyfriend because he's lowkey rubbing it in their face that he is in fact, taken.

"next time you try to see me again, might as well buy one of the tickets to my fan signings because you’re not seeing me again otherwise.. well, not like you can afford it anyways." *fabulous hair flip*

something unsaid; either way I'll kick you out if you try to get in

kalim

most safest person to flirt with, even if you're friends with their lover but also the most impossible to actually try and 'steal.'

the thing about kalim is that he's adorably stupid, not to degrade him in any shape or form but he's so oblivious about everything that you could consider it as one of his redeemable traits to be adorable.

he takes everything you say so seriously to the point where if you joke about wanting to water an entire continent he's just there with his carpet waiting for you cause he's gonna do exactly that.

"you're in luck cause I have a lot of water in me!" pops his non existent guns on his arms. (he is talking about his unique magic..)

it takes a remarkable mind to be like... that but you like him all the well about it, compliment his stupid-ness and he'll just grin, flush a little and laugh loudly as he compliments you back. not an ounce of anger in his tiny body.

red eyes but what a bright heart!

the type of guy that goes. "any friend of yours is a friend of mine!" so when he meets your friend group, casually just throws them a grand ball. they don't know whether to be flattered or.. concerned cause this is pretty weird.

not only was one of your friends awed over the mere value of many things inside the dorm he renovated, apparently his very huge bank full of gold was something to gasp over too.

and that's exactly what they did. (I mean get that bag sis but that bag is already owned by someone else and that's you... so that's not slay of you, random friend.)

here's when his nature proves to be quite relenting, even after many flirting, even using those cringe pickup lines from the internet, he just won't budge! it's getting irritating cause they're sure the people already heard the embarrassing words coming out of their mouth.

also that they were flirting with a non-legally married man. (to you ofc ofc.)

kalim either laughs at them because he thinks they were jokes, and just funny or laughs just because he's kalim.

he didn't really mind the casual touches at first, maybe it was friendly? he does it all the time after all but there was a stinking feeling that it felt weird and that alone was weird cause friendly pats were supposed to feel good.

not with you though cause those feel great!

accidentally shuts them down cause they're feeling like a third wheel when you come back after a bathroom break and it's like a total contrast to how he was treating them.

how do you seriously not notice kalim now unintentionally flirting with you?! are both of you airheads?!

he was literally all over you when you quipped up a "hi, I'm back."

and he was like; "welcome back :DDDD!!!!" if it wasn't already obvious they'd even add floating hearts emojis all over his head.

something unsaid; girl he didn't even notice anything was up...

azul

kinda a 50/50?

I'm not sure if most people really dig the whole 'bad reputation' thing. he's friends with the most terrifying twins in the entire campus, notably scammed a lot of people, can give wishes with an extreme price.

oh yeah he runs monstro lounge too but that just means he won't have time to spend with a lover.

that's their own imagination but azul's actually very sweet and gets some overworked junior to do the work for him, usually jade since floyd just leaves if he's given the job. JUST so he can go fret over which tie to use for your unofficial date.

despite him annoyed and losing sleep 24/7 because of the tweels he still asks them which one to use, jade's opinion is most trustworthy since floyd picks the neon, vibrant ones. (don't question why he even owns it.)

I doubt he actually likes people though, anyone else than you? hard pass. he's a simp through and through but unlike idia who can't mask the mortification and disgust on his face even at the cost of his life, good thing that masks are one of the many things azul is good at.

he slips up sometimes cause he genuinely thinks it's embarrassing that they're doing whatever this is to him, (well more of an attempt?) and to you, who is also their friend and his lover.

slip up as in his eye twitches, he flinches away a little too fast when they touch him, and his smile wobbles.

I mean no one would notice if he uses his magic on one, singular person...

mentally makes a note to remember whoever this was cause they're not stepping foot in octavinelle ever again.

+ an object of fun for the tweels. #gotormentthatlife!!

he's just a polite guy, so he won't just straight up insult them but he does warn them. the only thing holding him back from cooking a whole table is the crowd that would definitely spread the news of him going batshit.

like; "could you please, stop this? I hope you're not as stupid as you make yourself out to be because if you think I'm an idiot to not know what you're doing.. "

meanwhile his mind; "ugh this bitch. [redacted] [redacted] [redacted]."

I mean he's not that intimidating ALONE but when he gets all threatening like that (🥰) he could pass for an assassin fr.

just gets the tweels to deal with them cause he does not have the patience to deal with this backstabbing ho and it's wasting his precious time that should have been spent talking with you.

ugh he did not spend like 30 whole minutes picking out his tie and gloves just for this.

azul when he sees you coming back: 😇

something unsaid; [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted].

leona

oh boy, cover your eyes cause we're stepping onto another level of SAVAGE. you don't call lions that for NOTHING ‼️ beastman or just beast.

has the least filter out of everyone, as in he just doesn't give a single fuck, he's the chillest (agressive) guy on the twst planet so if the thought of wanting to insult some stranger that doesn't have a significance in his life at all pops up in his mind he ain't gonna change it lol.

gives the stinkiest eyes, even his tail and ears pause to synchronize with his thoughts cause if they had googly eyes they'd have a side eye too.

if he's laying down and they try pulling him upwards, tryna latch onto him? *just shoves them cutely.* problem solved.

leona's nice enough to let them off without losing something cause you really do mean something to him if he's holding back for your expense knowing that this is one of your 'friends.'

they don't even deserve to be called that!

like no one interrupts his peaceful nap times except for when he stands up to interrupt it himself just to drag you down with him.

wait so basically anyone but him???

he, really doesn't want to waste energy on this fool and to be honest they're really boring him since you went out to grab something you forgot. (but knowing this person for less than an hour in his life, they probably had something to do with that too.) so you aren't here to give him a reason to stay awake.

them rambling but in leona's eyes they're a blurry figure cause he's really sleepy.

then suddenly he's an iphone promax when he's looking at you 💀

if they already didn't take a hint from his earlier shove, the dirt isn't the only thing he's gonna shove someone into. there's a lake there for a reason other than keeping a home for the fishes y'know. never would know if they eat people too. /j

"would you shut up?"

yeah that's all he says but we all know how sharp it is to hear that from somebody so they immediately shut up. there's absolutely no need for any waste on energy of them, just one look from him and they're SILENT.

hopefully embarrassed too cause wtf was that??

unfortunately he can't fully enjoy his usually relaxing nap cause this random is corrupting the atmosphere even when they're silent, I swear they could shift and leona feels like one step closer to smacking 'it.'

ignored them every single time they tried to call out to him LOUDLY before but when you just silently step back on the field, he already peeks out an eye??? like no words needed.

what love does to a mf... sighs... another cold male lead we've lost to romance because of our mc <4

something unsaid; I was really questioning if keeping myself from strangling someone was worth it. took more effort than doing it literally

riddle

I'd have a crush on him too tbh.

unlike azul who already knew their intentions from the start, polite enough to kindly drop signs that he's not interested. riddle doesn't get it, he's just polite as well but also confused?

like he doesn't know they're tryna flirt, but he does think their actions are strange like c'mon. why are they trying to feel him up? he has no idea except the thought that he doesn't like it at all.

also it feels like he's betraying you so he just straight up pulls their arm away off of him firmly and shakes his head.

"stop this behavior."

he sighs.

surprisingly he's patient but also impatient???

consider this the first and last warning cause he WILL excuse himself if it ever goes on, riddle can wait for you browse through a whole store with him following you around and playfully commenting on your taste but can't wait for their attitude to get better.

he ain't gonna waste any more of his precious minutes on this period.

I don't know how to explain it, he's totally unaware of what they want, which is him ironically. but the reason he's rejecting their advances is because he's so devoted and a simp for you.

not a lot of people have the balls to converse or touch around him carelessly like that so freely so isn't it basic human courtesy to hold off all the physical affection till they're more acquainted?

well, not that riddle's not gonna let their current relationship advance any further from strangers at this point...

he's so loyal to you that it's cute jabskans.

riddle sticks to his principles, and he certainly has his own preferences for the personality of people. one of the traits he despises is when they don't understand his earlier warnings.

of course riddle isn't very forgiving, they're lucky they were even given a chance before cause even he, doesn't spare his dorm members a second chance when they break a rule he's been plenty lenient with.

so if you were given a chance, you better take it cause he's not giving you another.

like how since you did take your chance he's not gonna let you go now 😍.

isn't the type to be rude to people for matters he deems conflict being easily avoidable so he just makes up a believable excuse and walks away loool.

and they're like thinking; didn't he say he was tired and had to sleep since he stayed up planning the unbirthday party... why is he having a tea date with you???

suddenly he didn't look too tired at all compared to when he randomly slumped to look exhausted before??

something unsaid; 🥰🍵 what a successful unbirthday party *forgets about them immediately cause you're both having an unofficial date.*

note. ok so something unsaids are basically that but don't misunderstand, it's something they didn't say.

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nordarknessdimsthesky · 8 months

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A linguistic analysis of tumblr hyperbole in the tags

This post expands my previous analysis of hyperbolic reactions to cluster tags by themes. There were too many themes, some of them overlapping, to create a cohesive graph. Instead, I present several overarching themes from a data set of 50 tags observed and documented in various corners of tumblr.

1. Feeling Normal™️

Tags within this cluster profess Normal feelings (read: extreme excitement, enthusiasm, obsession, derangement, etc.).

#mmmmrrrghuhhhhghhh #I'm so normal about it teehee #absolutely not rending my clothing #feeling very normal and not feral at all #i will simply never recover #gif sets sent to personally destroy me #i can't cope #the eyes #i'm a puddle #i am INCONSOLABLE #i am DISTRAUGHT #IM NOT OKKAAAAAAYYYYYY #FEELING TOTALLY ONE HUNDRED PERCENT NORMAL

2. Feralness

The following data points conjure animalistic behavior. There’s a non-zero amount of biting and chewing involved.

#chomping biting barking #biting my arms off #rattling my cage #[incoherent biting noises] #chewing glass #chewing through wood #*shaking the bars of my enclosure* HELLO!!!!!!!! #climbing the walls #biting gnawing chewing #im gonna rip off my front door and eat it

3. Noisy Emotional Outbursts

These tags encompass crying, screaming, yelling, and other loud reactions.

# shaking sobbing crying #SCREAMIIIING BANGING MY HEAD ON THE WALL #*no thoughts only wailing* #i am SOBBING #IM CRYING LIKE A BITCH #*just fucking yelling* #S C R E A M #screeching into a pillow #brb sobbing for 5-7 business years

4. Throwing

All of these tags except the last one involve being thrown instead of throwing things. I, personally, am entertained by the range of places/situations people are throwing themselves into.

#i am going to THROW MYSELF into the SEA #hurl me into the sea #hurl me into the sun #trebuchet me into the sun #hurl me straight at europa #vent me out of an airlock #slam me against a wall #put me in a box and throw me down the stairs #throwing myself into traffic you know? #just defenestrate me already #defenestrate me #absolutely hurl me through plate glass #i'm going to start tossing furniture

5. Bodily Harm

There’s a good deal of overlap with the previous theme. Nearly all of the tags involving throwing would result in varying degrees of bodily harm. Here are the tags outside of the Throwing subgroup.

#im going to throw upppppp #tearing my hair out #banging my head against the wall #SCREAMIIIING BANGING MY HEAD ON THE WALL #biting my arms off #microwaving myself #crumple me up and microwave me

6. Absurdism

My personal favorite cluster. The imagery conjured and resulting comedic hyperbole is just [chef’s kiss].

#im gonna rip off my front door and eat it #crumple me up and microwave me #put me in a box and throw me down the stairs #defenestrate me #absolutely hurl me through plate glass

7. Keysmashes

These tags center less around meaning and more around style, so they form the last group. A handful of these could fall under Noisy Emotional Outbursts because they represent reaction noises. In my linguistic judgment, keysmashing increases the hyperbole – consider augh versus aughfhghghghhh – the latter reads as prolonged and more intense emotionally.

#aghdjakgsjadhjaka * #hrhrhrhgnnnghhhhh #aughfhghghghhh #mmmmrrrghuhhhhghhh #I'm so normal about it teehee #waughfhghghh #oughhhhghghhh

*one digression in a friend discord server was how people interpret keysmashes in their minds. Some hear the first couple letters and then some sputtering, others hear static. It’s a common joke that you need a minor in linguistics to understand conversations in this friend group. Such is the nature of things when the chaos linguist energy is strong.

#internet linguistics #tumblr linguistics #tumblr dialect #hyperbole #linguistics #tumblr #speaking and musing #the chaos linguist speaks

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judebelle · 6 months

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been thinking ab joao and reader hooking up behind his teammates backs'... like they've been "involved" for a while but sometimes the tension is too much and they have to sneak away iykwim ;)

sneaky - j.f. x reader

a/n : omfg anon ur gonna be the death of meeeeeee!! also i made this kinda long since i havent posted in a while, oops..

pairing : joao felix x fem!reader

word count : 2.3k

summary : joao and u prefer to keep your love life private, secret even, but the the flirty looks and knowing smirks from across the room are becoming unbearable.

cw : smut obv, lil bit of alejandro x reader, sneaky joao and reader, unprotected sex (wrap it b4 u tap it ppl), make outs, cursing, me not bothering to accent his name lol sorry

---

you were starting to regret going out to dinner with your friend alejandro and his teammates.

the only reason why being that one of his teammates had become more.

hooking up with joao felix on the down low has been fun, you won't lie. and while you enjoy sneaky quickies and flirty messages, there were times where you wish you could just tear off his clothes and fuck that smug smile right off his face.

you were currently sitting in a restaurant, a private room and table was booked for alejandro, his barcelona teammates, and their plus ones. you and alejandro had become inseparable ever since you met in spain a few years ago, and you had grown increasingly close to his teammates.

very close to a certain mr felix.

the first time you met joao, it wasn't anything magical, you just thought he was fit. alejandro had introduced you to him when he came on loan to barca recently, and you just couldn't get him out of your head.

it seems that the feelings were mutual, as that very same night he followed you on instagram. you, of course, played it cool and took your time following him back (you waited like 10 seconds).

from there, you two messaged often, especially after the team would hang out.

joaofelix79 : u got home safe?

ynsusername : ofc i did

ynsusername : alejandro wouldn't let anything happen to me

joaofelix79 : that's good.

you two started messaging more, sometimes even calling each other late in the night. you couldn't explain why, maybe he was just fun to talk to.

you would complain to him about work, and he would complain about a mistake he made in training.

eventually, you two started hanging out alone.

not anything crazy, of course.

joaofelix79 : hey

joaofelix79 : js noticed im about to drive by ur place

joaofelix79 : wanna get some ice cream? my treat

how could you refuse that?

it wasn't all that shocking to you when a surprise ice cream date turned out into a steamy make out session on a bench in a park in the middle of the night.

"we should stop, someone might see us.." you murmured against the portuguese boy's lips, you yourself making no effort to.

"ok, if that's what you want." he pulled away from you, his fluffy hair disheveled thanks to you.

"5 more minutes" you placed your lips on his again, feeling him smile against them.

from there, weekly hangouts became almost nightly. he would pick you up in his car, and you would drive anywhere. you just needed an excuse to make out. you even put your number in his phone.

eventually, joao grew tired of the make outs that led to nothing, and you did too.

12:03 am - joao : wyd

12:03 am - you : was ab to put some instant noodles in the microwave lol

12:04 am - joao : dont bother

12:04 am - joao : come eat at my place

12:05 am - joao : i ordered uber eats

of course, you went, and you two ate the chinese takeout he bought. you two sat and laughed together at his attempt at using chopsticks.

and then you found yourself perched on his kitchen counter, him in between your legs while he rammed into you mercilessly. you left red marks across his back and biceps.

"my god, you feel amazing, querida." joao's words were muffled as his head was nuzzled into your neck, his lips caressing your hot skin with every word he spoke.

"i'm so fucking close, joao.." you whined and whispered curses while your hands found themselves travelling from his arms to his hair, tugging on the soft brown locks.

"let go, y/n, i'm close too!" he removed his flushed face from your neck and connected your lips together again, breathing heavily into your mouth.

you came undone with a sharp whine, arching into him. his thrusts became sloppy as he let out a long groan against your lips, releasing into the condom.

that was the first time you two had fucked, and it definitely would not be the last.

his house was usually where you two would hook up because it was so big, and you didn't have to worry about anything when you were there.

you two fucked anywhere - on the bed, in the shower, on the couch, even in the laundry room.

you found that it didn't really matter where you were. if either of you were craving the other, it happened right then and there. it was fun. it kept you on your toes, kept things fresh and fun.

but it became a curse when you two were at a team dinner.

---

"si, i told him he could go fuck off if that was what he wanted. that guy needs to learn some manners, for fucks sake!"

the table erupted in laughs as pedro went on about some story that you weren't really paying attention to to be honest. you were sat right beside your good friend, alejandro, who was very intrigued in pedro's story and hadn't spoken to you more than twice this evening.

across from you was joao. he was wearing a black dress shirt that hugged his biceps perfectly along with black dress pants. of course, to make your life more difficult, the top two shirt buttons weren't done up.

one more open button and everyone would've seen the hickey you gave him the other-

"isn't that right, y/n?"

alejandro was speaking to you, and you were too busy staring at joao's biceps to hear him.

"hmm? sorry?"

"i said, it was you who i walked in on dancing silently in the darkness darkness of your room, right?" alejandro smirked at the sight of your cheeks going red, this memory being nothing short of embarrassing to you.

"yup, that- uh- that was me..!" you looked down in humiliation as the table giggled at alejandro's unexpected story about you. he loved embarrassing you, it was his thing. he found it fun because he thought of you like a little sister.

you looked up to see joao, laughing along with everyone else at the table, finding amusement in your misery. you shot him a playful glare.

"i'm only teasing, mi corazón." alejandro chuckled before ruffling your hair. "ale!" you whined, fixing your hair. his friends teased you. they all thought of you as their little sister, especially you being one of the younger ones.

the men continued on with their conversations as you continued looking at joao from your end of the table, only this time, he was looking at you too.

he was taking a slow sip of his water, eyeing you down.

joao wasn't the only one dressed all sexy tonight. you wore a short black satin strapless dress that hugged your figure perfectly. you thought of joao when you picked it out, you thought of him while putting it on, and you thought of him taking it off.

it seems that joao had the same thought. the way he looked at you from under his lashes gave you the impression that your outfit choice was a smart one.

you sent him a quick wink.

he smirked and dropped his eyes to your cleavage, widening them.

you rolled yours before continuing to eat your steak.

---

you couldn't take it anymore.

something the way he laughed with everyone at the table, his hair flowing when he turned his head. he had on a gold rolex and a gold chain, both glistening under the lighting over the table.

it was the way he carried himself with such confidence. he knew he was hot, and he knew you knew it too. that confidence definitely carried over into bed.

finally, you got up from the table, excusing yourself to "make a call".

shooting joao a quick look, he took the hint. his eyes followed you, watching you exit the restaurant and head towards the parking lot. after an agonizing 30 seconds or so, joao told everyone he forgot something in his car, and made a beeline to where he saw you last.

he saw you standing outside his car, waiting for him. he made his way towards you.

"so, who did you have to call?" he teased, his eyes waiting for your reaction. you scoffed and rolled your eyes, "very funny.".

you wrapped your arms around his neck, bringing him closer to you as you leaned against his car. he smiled down at you before looking over your figure.

"nice dress.."

"just take it off."

---

you two had squeezed into the back of his car, leaving nothing but surrounding street lights as your light source. you straddled his waist, rocking your hips while you smashed your lips against his. you two were breathing heavily, occasionally breaking the kiss to huff and puff before going back at it again.

joao's arms were wrapped tightly around your waist, his right hand occasionally sliding down to cup and smack your ass. his actions made you yelp into the kiss. your arms were everywhere. cupping his face, on his shoulders, in his hair, on his chest, on his abs.

it was like you two hadn't seen each other in years. like you were drowning and the only way to breathe was.. this.

your smooth rocking of the hips created a hard bulge in joao's pants which felt great on your throbbing clit. he groaned into the kiss, breaking it for you to breathe and to leave kisses down your neck.

"so, fucking, horny" he broke each word with a kiss. you moaned above him. "you can't even last one dinner party without my hands all over you?" you wanted him to shut up, so you grabbed his face in your hand and smashed your lips against his.

you started unbuttoning his shirt, but your hands were too shaky to do it quickly. "take this off, god damnit!" you groaned as he laughed and began unbuttoning it himself. you hiked your dress up and helped him with the last few buttons.

you moved his shirt partially off him, leaving it on his arms since you couldn't be bothered. you leaned down to kiss his chest while looking up at him. he was smiling down at you, hands rested behind his head.

he brought you back up to pull the top of your dress down just enough so that your tits would pop out. when they did, he licked his lips. now it was his turn to lean down and suck on them, making you tilt your head back and pant.

"joao, we dont have time for this-"

"shhh, patience princesa. don't worry." he went back to sucking.

"they're going to realize we're gone- joao!"

he couldn't bring himself to leave your tits alone, but when he did, you quickly reached down and undid his belt , not even bothering to pull it off.

"estás mesmo excitado, não é?" (you're really excited, aren't you?)

you nodded and bit your lip.

he unzipped his pants and pulled his hard cock out of his boxers. you raised yourself up on your knees and hovered over his dick. he held it up with one hand, the other resting on your hip.

"are you ready for me?" he teased.

"enough questions." you cut his teasing short as you took his cock in your hands yourself and sunk down on him.

joao hissed at the unexpected pleasure. he looked up at you, gasping for air above him before tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

"move for me, bebé."

you did as you were told, lifting your hips up until just the tip of him was left in you, before sinking back down on him, agonizingly slow.

he shuddered at the feeling.

you picked up the pace, causing the car to rock. your tits bounced in his face, causing him to twitch inside you.

"fuck, y/n, you're amazing-" you laugh breathlessly above him, your hands resting on his shoulders for stability while his gripped your hips tightly.

after some time, your thighs were burning, and you were getting tired. joao picked this up, taking control. his grip on your hips was put to some use as he moved your hips up and down for you. he lifted and dropped you so easily and made you move so much faster. you felt the air leave your lungs and arched your back to stick your tits in his face.

he grinned as he thrusted his hips up, meeting you in the middle. he tilted your body back, and started to hit the spot inside you that made you see white.

your pants and gasps turned into moans and whines as you felt the bundle of heat in your core.

"joao, i'm close" you warned, your nails digging into his shoudlers.

"i'm right there with you, baby, oh," he groaned and grunted as he watched him drill into you faster and faster. "meu deus, foda-se!" (my god, fuck!) he hissed with gritted teeth as he felt you clench around him.

his pace was too much for you to hold back. you let go with a gasp and moan, your hand slamming and sliding down the steamy car window, leaving a print.

joao was, indeed, right there with you. he pulled your body off of him and set you down on his thighs hastily before stroking his red, throbbing cock, cumming all over your stomach with a string of grunts and pants.

you both sat there in the hot and dark car in disbelief, covered in sweat and panting, after having the most mind blowing sex you've ever had. you leaned your forehead against his and smiled. he chuckled before teasing you once more.

"let's go. we don't want to miss dessert, do we?"

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kpop-yes · 7 months

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Chaewon x Male reader - We got married

So Im gonna start like a mini series called We got married, and it's basically dedicated to the show, We got married.

If you haven't seen it it's basically two idols pretending to be, you know, married.

Anyways I hope you enjoy reading!

Underlined = English

Normal= Korean

____

You woke up groaning, wondering where She went.

Who was She?

Well She Is Chaewon, Yep That Chaewon, the one from le sserafim.

Why were you wondering where she was, well it's simple, you two were married.

Well not literally, but for a show, called we got married.

You signed a contract agreeing to 'Marry' Someone for a time period.

What you didn't expect was that someone, was Chaewon.

You didn't believe them when they told you who you were 'Marrying', but you believed them when Chaewon walked through the door and looked straight at you with a smile.

But who were you?

Well you were from a group called (Group name) that was formed a while back.

You weren't the biggest kpop group but your group was known.

The whole reason you agreed to be on the show was to promote your group's recent comeback.

Anyways, back to reality, You were looking for Chaewon when she bursted through the door and said good morning to you,

"Ah your awake Y/n! I made Breakfast!" She said enthusiastically.

You lazily got off the bed and went to the bathroom and took a quick shower.

It's been two months since this whole show started and it was taking a toll on you.

——

What started as pretending ended up being not pretending no more.

The more time you spent with Chaewon the more you fell in love with her, and the same it was for her.

You two never considered each other actual Couples until one night when you two couldn't sleep. Chaewon brought up if you two were actually considered dating and if it was official,

To which you flabbergasted by.

But after some thinking and wondering, you two made a conclusion that you two were in fact dating, sealing that conclusion with a kiss.

A kiss, that's all that you two did to show affection for each other, that one kiss.

You stated you thinking about that kiss, wondering if you should ever kiss her, or if she's not ready.

——

You got done with your shower, changed, did your hair, brushed your teeth, and headed to the kitchen.

The first thing you saw was Chaewon.

Chaewon was wearing a Pink tank top, which really gained your attention.

Besides that, you sat down and Chaewon gave you a plate of what she made.

What did she make, well she microwaved pancakes and put syrup on top with a strawberry to top it off.

"I thought you 'Made' Breakfast? All you did was Microwave the pancakes, put syrup, and put a strawberry on top of it?" You said Confused.

"Well... yeah technically I didn't 'Make' them, but I made them with Love, and that's all that matters!" She said.

You scoffed at her statement, but

still indulging her Love Made pancakes.

After finishing your breakfast, you put on your shoes, grabbed your coat, and waited at the front door for Chaewon.

You didn't wait for long as you saw Chaewon speed walk towards you,

"Okay lets go now" Chaewon said.

"Where's your coat, it's cold outside?"

"Oh uh I left it back at the stadium heh"

You chuckled at her, but you took off your coat and put it on Chaewon,

"Here, have mine"

Chaewon blushed at your action, and so did you.

Once you zipped the coat up, you opened the door for her and walked outside.

Where were you two going? You had absolutely no idea, but it didn't matter to you.

All that mattered was that Chaewon was besides you and nothing else mattered.

Holding Chaewon's hand, you two strolled down a park and into a store.

The first thing Chaewon did once she entered the store was look for ice cream.

Once she found the ice cream section, she had a hard time deciding what ice cream she wanted.

She lowered her options to two options, but she still had trouble deciding what flavor she wanted.

"How about I get (Option 2) and you get (option 1) and I'll just ket you have some of mine?"

Chaewon quickly nodded and grabbed both flavors from the freezer.

You paid for the ice cream and gave one to Chaewon.

"Hey I want that one!" She said grabbing the one you had and gave you hers.

"Wait, no I want that one back!"

After a while She finally settled on one flavor but still wanted to taste the other one every now and then.

But what gained your attention was the way Chaewon would lick the ice cream.

Her eyes staring at you while her tongue slowly licks the ice cream, it was definitely a turn on for you.

You immediately turned away blushing and and so did Chaewon.

It was completely silent until you two were heading home.

The cameras weren’t turned on as it was during commercial breaks and the camera crew were heading towards the apartment.

The sun was going down when Chaewon looked at you with a more serious expression and tone,

“Y/n?”

“whats up?”

“What are we going to be when this show is over?”

You were completely speechless but were also confused? What was going to happen with you two after the show was over?

Were you two still going to be dating, or call things off?

You didn’t know but also didn’t want to think about the future.

All that mattered was the present and spending every day with Chaewon.

“No idea, but We’ll see what happens when it’s time”.

Chaewon smiled at you and gave you a small peck on your cheek.

When you entered the apartment, the first thing you did was blast the heat and go straight to your bed.

Chaewon soon followed you after removing her coat and jumping on top of the bed next to you.

It was 12:00 in the middle of the night and you still couldn’t sleep, and neither could Chaewon.

The Cameras were off but would turn on if there was a loud noise.

It was Silent in the room and you were staring at the ceiling when Chaewon sat on top of you and whispered,

“Y/n, were married right?”

“Well, technically for the next few months yeah, why?”

“Because I’ve wanted to do this forever”.

And with a swift move Chaewon pulled your pants and boxers down simultaneously.

“Hey, Chaewon what’re you doing!-“

“Shush, the camera will turn on if you yell”, she scolded you while caressing your member.

“Chaewon, we can’t be doing this, what if the cameras turn on, we’ll be caught?”

“I don’t care about that Y/n, I’m doing what all married couples do, right?”

“Well… uh yeah but we’re not even technically married, this is just for the show”.

Chaewon looked at you with a frown,

“So you don’t love me? You’re just pretending?”

“aish, that’s not what I meant Chaewon”

“I know Y/n, your dick obviously loves me”, she said while staring at your member slowly rising.

She nuzzled your member while slowly stroking, and It didn’t take long for your member to get fully hard.

Chaewon started taking small licks before sucking your member. Chaewon slowly thrusted her head back and forth, making sure you felt the back of her throat.

Chaewon stared intently into your eyes, waiting for you cum.

But She knew you wouldn’t burst instantly, so she changed her form.

Chaewon’s sucking got increasingly faster as she was bobbing her head like a funko pop.

Your legs felt numb as you felt your limit, and so did Chaewon.

With a final bob, Chaewon took your member in as long as she could while strings of cum hit the back of her throat.

After releasing every bit of string you could, Chaewon bobbed back and swallowed every bit of cum in her mouth.

Chaewon quickly wasted no time as she squatted on top of you, took her shorts off, pulled her panties off, and lined up her pussy with your member.

She quickly took all of you, with moans following after quickly.

“Ah, Chaewon, you’re so tight ah”

Chaewon slowly started moving up and down, with a moan following after every movement.

Chaewon couldn’t keep up at your pace as she had to slow down many times, not wanting to get caught, but you had other plans.

You grabbed Chaewon’s hips as you started thrusting back and forth quickly, with many moans coming from Chaewon.

“Ah ha Y/n, slow down, The, ah Camera is going to turn on ah”.

You connected your lips with Chaewons as you started thrusting faster.

You knew her moans were going to trigger the camera so making out with her while fucking her was the only way to subdue her.

Your member continuously hitting her womb while your balls slapped her thighs was what was causing you to almost reach your limit.

With little time left until you cum, you quickly thrusted as fast you could until your legs went numb.

And with lots of moans and groans, Strings of cum quickly came out of your member as you creampied Chaewon.

After you released all your loads, Chaewon laid next to you with cum leaking out of her.

You admired her and the mess you made inside of her, wondering what adventures await with Chaewon, and saying to yourself,

“We Got Married”

#kpop #kpop smut #kpop fanfic male reader #female idol smut #girl group smut #kpop gg smut #izone #izone smut #le sserafim #Le sserafim smut #Chaewon #Chaewon smut #Wizone

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starpunkssgalaxy · 23 days

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sbg headcanons pt. 2!!

- aiden steals traffic cones, he has several in his room (tyler got stuck in one of those big round ones, tripped and almost rolled into traffic if it hadnt been for logan who threw himself in front of it. taylor was also in one and wanted a pic for her social media so she convinced tyler to put one on too, thats how it happened 😭)

- ben is the type to trade shirts if the girls are feeling uncomfortable, just imagine taylor in bens baggy ass shirt and ben is wearing some cute little crop top lmaooo hes to sweet

- tyler the type to sit in the weirdest places, perfectly good chair?? nah he’s sitting precariously on an open windowsill (yes he did fall out of it once and it was actually aiden who jumped out after him because he was closest)

- when ash was little she would bring home all kinds of animals, her parents would have to search her pockets everytime she came back in from outside and they’d find all kinds of frogs, harmless snakes, bugs, baby birds (she has raised several birds)

- aiden will not move until he’s chosen music for the drive, he once stepped on a nail but refused to drive to the hospital until his bluetooth connected in the car and everyone was yelling at him

- building onto the bird thing and ashlyn, she’s befriended a murder of crows and has a ton of weird little trinkets theyve brought her because she feeds them in return

- ben has a diary/journal he religiously writes in purely with glitter gel pen. there are horrors beyond comprehension and he’s writing them all down in pink sparkly pen (ex. 🎀 𝒯𝓎𝓁𝑒𝓇 𝒾𝓈 𝒹𝑒𝒶𝒹 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝐼 𝒻𝑒𝒶𝓇 𝐼 𝓂𝒶𝓎 𝒷𝑒 𝓃𝑒𝓍𝓉 🎀) LMAOO

- aiden on the other hand needs to invest in a journal because he has no filter, like much love aiden but unfortunately i dont want to hear in gross detail about what happened to you after you drank windex thinking it was gatorade

- logan’s guilty pleasure is watching minecraft videos before bed (its ldshadowlady)

- logan also owns a cat and im a firm believer in this, it’s a scottish fold and he would do anything for this cat

- girl scout cookie season comes around and Ben is SCOPING these girls out. he wants his damn cookies and hes gonna drag you everywhere w him to find them

- DO NOTTTTTT. DO NOT. let Tyler in the kitchen. and its not because he lacks skill in cooking he is just so forgetful. he’s probably exploded several microwaves because he forgot to put water in w his ramen

#sbg headcanons #school bus graveyard #sbg taylor #sbg ben #aiden sbg #sbg tyler #ashlyn sbg #logan sbg #sbg (webtoon)#webtoons #maybe im projecting #these may not be in character :3c #dont ask me why aiden is driving w a nail in his foot an not someone else #shhhhh #tyler can cook obvs im just saying i think hes a little forgetful 😭

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justpuppylove · 11 months

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Doll- stepdad dream smut

Stepdad!dream x afab reader smut

Kinks/warnings: Stepcest [PLEASE DONT FUCK YOUR STEP-SIBLINGS OR PARENTS. I DO NOT CONDONE THIS.], daddy kink, use of little one and other names, praising, thigh fucking, slight breeding.

A/N: im gonna step away from the Wilbur smut for a sec but I’ll make sure to make my way through those requests soon :3

Your mom introduced your stepdad dream a few months ago and he seemed like a decent enough guy. You were against your mom dating again after your father passed away but you eventually came around to the idea of dream staying with you guys. This isn’t to say you see him as a father figure, he treats you like his child in some ways but there’s just always been something off about you guys having a “father-child relationship”. He’s always been pretty touchy with you and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy it. At first it was playful touching, nothing coherently sexual about it, but then it progressed into you sitting on his lap and him running his hand up your thigh. Of course your mom never knew of any of this and you hoped she never would, you felt so guilty every time it happened but for some reason that made you even more turned on.

You walked into your bedroom and shut the door. You ran to your bed and flopped down; utterly exhausted. Exams were getting the best of you but you finally had some time to rest. Then you heard a knock on your door.

“Doll, do you want to watch a movie with me? Your mom is gone for the weekend and I’m bored.” Dream said, dragging out the D in bored. You were so tired but how could you say no to dream?

“Sure I’ll be down in a minute, pick out a movie for us.” You said reluctantly dragging your body off of your bed. You hear him turn away and start walking back downstairs as you head over to your closet. You get out a oversized shirt that dream had gave you as a hand-me-down and you change into it. You wanted to be comfortable so you took off your bra and didn’t put any shorts on so you were just in his shirt and your underwear. When you were done you made your way downstairs to dream cooking popcorn in the kitchen. You walk into the kitchen to grab a few snacks and go to sit them onto the living room table. You hear the microwave ding and you walk back into the kitchen to see dream putting the popcorn into a big bowl. You squeeze past dream, grinding against him as you do so, to look for the salt. You hear him let out a groan before walking up behind you, pressing your stomach up to the counter top as you feel his hard dick against your ass. You let out a whimper as he reaches up into the cupboard to grab the salt out.

“Is this what you were looking for darling~?” He asked you, putting the salt infront of your face but keep your bodies in the same position. All you could let out is a little ‘mhm’ as he backs away, walking into the living room. He presses play as you follow him onto the couch as you see him pat his lap, signaling for you to sit on it. You feel your face grow red as you press yourself onto his lap, his dick pressing onto your pussy as you let out a small moan. “What’s wrong baby?” Dream says as he feels his way up your thigh. You respond to him by pressing yourself harder onto his dick, “Is this the problem little one?” He says pressing has fingers onto your clothed pussy. “Awe, you’re soaking wet. Do you need daddy to take care of you?” He asks. You nod, “I need your words sweetheart”. “Yes daddy, please take care of me.” You say highly embarrassed. He giggles into your ear as he begins rubbing your pussy through your underwear, your hand shoots to his and you try to press yourself onto his hand. He slides your underwear down before sliding off his own. His hard dick shoots up as he makes you wrap your thighs around his dick. He starts thigh fucking you while both hands are squeezing your thighs. You hold onto his wrists while he kisses the back of your neck. Your pretty moans and his groans fill the room. “Fuck, you don’t know how long I’ve needed this doll. Ive needed to use your pretty little body so bad.” He says before fucking your thighs faster. His precum and your wetness covering your thighs as his dick slides between your folds and hits your clit in just the right way. “Ah~ gonna cum daddy” you moan, squeezing his wrists. “Cum for me, you’re doing so good” he says as he removes one of his hands from your thigh to circle your clit instead.

He cums all over your thighs as you cum onto his dick. He picks your body up and turns you around to face him. He kisses you as he slides his dick inside of you, making your yelp. “Shh~ its okay, I have you. Daddy has you.” He says as he pulls you closer, slowly pushing his dick in until he bottoms out. He begins fucking into you, making you bounce on him. He lifts your shirt up and watches your tits bounce as you move up and down on him. He smirks at how embarrassed you got at this. “Is my little baby embarrassed? You’re so adorable.” He said before grabbing one of your hands, holding it as he fucks into you harder. Your moans get louder and louder as you feel yourself getting closer to cumming. “Just like that, cum for me baby.” He says before playing with one of your tits. “I’m going to cum inside of you okay? Can you handle that doll?” He asks. He let out a few yes’s before cumming on his dick for the second time. He slams into you a few more times before spilling his seed into your pussy.

He pulls you off of his dick and gets a paper towel to clean you both up with. He puts his clothes back on before sliding your underwear back onto you. He lays on the couch and pulls you in. The credits of the movie roll as you fall asleep.

#dsmp #justpuppylove #dsmp smut #dream smut #smut #dreamwastaken #dream team smut #dreamwastaken smut #stepdad #mcyt smut #mcyt x you #mcyt #mcyt x y/n #dream smp #dream team #stepdad smut #stepdad dream

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