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#ill just have to break those parts off and redo it
lillybean730 · 1 year
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pro: brother gave me a dagger
mega-con: it's got iron crosses on it
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n7punk · 3 months
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this project (vague) has come out so beautifully and i'm really excited to share it (hopefully soon) but by god has it been so much more work than i expected/planned and i have Had It Up To Here with this
okay so i first thought. this is six steps, right? no big deal. actually fuck it ill say i was like okay so: lines, 3 parts, some editing, and another element, and then it's done, easy!
then i completely changed the style i was doing it in and every one of those steps (except the lines and editing) became 10x so we're already at 42. then that editing was way more complicated than i expected it to be so like just make that 51x. oh that remaining element? also 10x, then hate it, redo it twice for a round x20, then hate that and go back to the original to build off for another x5, so yeah we're jumping right up to x85 more work than i expected.
and that was half one :)
to be fair half two was not x10 for everything because i had a better idea of what i was doing, more like x3 for all the elements, with totaled 5 parts. actually that last part was complicated as hell so it was x5. i don't like 17 so lets just say x20 because it was still a lot of work lmao. then i kept finding errors and improvements and accidentally combined layers together i shouldn't have and i had to edit and rebuild all the parts multiple times for very Minor things but with this much investment i'm not phoning it in fucking now so that ended up being x15 the amount of work i was expecting.
so we're at x100 more work than i was expecting already. then i have to put it all together, and this is when i found a bunch of those errors, so i had/have to (because i haven't finished) put it all together again multiple times.
but i should be all done, right? aside from re-editing and exporting i should be done now... right? :)
😭
i'm looking at it now and i'm trying to decide if i need to add a Real Background and not just color. that was not the plan!! the whole thing was supposed to flat color, and now i'm here. does anyone know how much procreate fastforwards its timelapse videos? like one second of the timelapse is ten irl minutes or something? because my video for this is Multiple Minutes long and because it's branching over multiple files even that isn't an accurate gauge of how long i've worked on this. fuck me. i need a cigarette (i don't smoke)
if i didn't like how it has come out so far it would be so much easier to just move on OTL. can't tell if i'm coping by telling myself a more detailed background would just be distracting or if i'm over complicating it but right now it looks Bare. which means i have to take another break on this thing and come back. i have to take days and weeks off at a time lmao i am Not naturally inclined to being an artist of like. good high effort things. i can't tell you the last time i put this much effort into one (two) drawings. but i gotta for this one. hwaugh. looking at it to remind myself i like it and i am enjoying it when i'm not frustrated XD
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livingroombeat · 6 months
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Living room beat progress update 12\16\23
Hi gang, are you ready for your scheduled progress update? I sure am the worlds most consistent writer. well anyway ive been doing some planning for a4 and im gonna kinda explain my current roadmap here.
-do end of a3 animation
Yeah i havent done it yet, ive just been procrastinating. Anyway though its gonna be a short one and it wont take long so this isnt like a major deal or anything.
-do a4
I have the events of a4 planned in detail already in a text file so all i have to do is write the dialogue and turn it into comics. Ive said it before and ill say it again: a3 was WAY too many comics. There were so many comics that were just a couple of words and thats just completely stupid. A3 couldve been like 100 comics but instead ended up at 300+ because i did it like an idiot. But im not gonna do that with a4, it will be pretty short in comic number but each one will have loads of dialogue. It will be super efficient.
-post
I might actually post a3 before finishing a4, but again a4 is going to be super short in page count so it probably wont take TOO long to actually make, so waiting til after its done isnt completely unreasonable.
-do new website
Blogger sucks, its a terrible platform, so im gonna make a new website and host it on github pages. It will be made so that it is super easy for me to bulk upload LOADS of new pages at once so that i wont keep putting it off like ive been doing with the rest of a3. It will be all automatic and everything so i dont have to spend multiple hours on it lol. I will also be able to do bulk changes to the page format so i dont have to go individually through each post and change it. Maybe even a back button????
-do a lot of the story
This is a super vague bullet point but i just kinda want to make my way a fair chunk through the story before doing the next point because it would be kinda annoying to just be halted after a4 for ages.
-go back and redo a0 through a3 (and maybe a4, well see how that turns out)
Ive already said it in this post but a0 through a3 kinda just suck, theres loads of changes i would make now if i made them, so i plan to go back and change them. This would also make lrb more accessible for new readers because they dont have through over 100 pages for it to get 'ok'. I also plan to have a summary page to catch people up on the story of a0 through a4 quickly so that they can get into a5 and beyond. I will probably only keep that summary page until ive finished remaking a0 through a3, but i will post it after a4 as a4 is a good break off point in the story (youll see).
-do rest of the story
This is pretty self explanatory. Theres loads of story to go.
Among all of these points is also planning a5 and beyond as what i said before isnt true. I originally wasnt going to change the actual story i had planned but i changed my mind on that, the main story is being changed quite a bit.
The thing is i noticed the problems with the structure but didnt notice the ROOT cause of those problems, the fact that the characters act as too much of a conglomerate and have literally 0 independence.
Ok what do i mean by that. Well basically all of the alternate reality versions of streve and brian, and even streve and brian themselves, could be compressed into 1 character reasoning their decisions out with themself. They have 'disagreements' but they dont have any REAL disagreements, they always come around and end up acting as a group in the end.
Now is this because im a bad writer? Probably but i can (try to) fix it in future parts of the story. So im gonna do that.
I also plan to make more social media for the comic rather than just tumblr and reddit. Like a twitter even though that site is dying.
I also also need to come up with a name to sign these posts with. All webcomic authors have some name they go by, i dont. So ill come up with one. Anyway thats all i have to say for this progress update. This one ended up being super long so hopefully that makes up for me missing so many. See you next saturday.
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dzpenumbra · 1 year
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4/23/23
I had another sleep-like-crap night, then sleep-in-the-comfy-chair day. It was because of a dream this time. I don't really remember it fully. I woke up in a scene where I was at this really unique bakery, it was so intensely vivid. It was very home-like, with white walls and lots of dark high contrast decor and food. It was a unique, cool cafe kinda place, it reminded me of a place in... either Boston or Portland, ME, I don't remember... that was a cupcake bar or something, like all they had was cupcakes and you just go and eat, and the whole place was like... part of a renovated house. It was cool.
In this dream, I was with my mom. And it was uncomfortable. And I had to like... explain to her how my cat had died. Like she didn't know. It was really upsetting, enough to wake me up after 5 hours of sleep and have me not want to dream journal it, or go back to sleep.
I was on social media for a while, Instagram this time. But the ads completely counteracted the palate-cleanse it was intended for. That's the biggest problem with social media for me - I can curate follows and subreddits and all that the best I can... and still... every 5th thing on my feed is going to be some paid placement that is either political, predatory, or obnoxious. It is extremely rare for it to be anything other than those three categories. Today, it was an onslaught of ads targeting "get a fucking job", "employment in your state", "government jobs with no work experience required", "how to make money writing copy for tech companies", "buy this program to make money as an artist! Get billions of followers today!" And, to top it off, ads for at-home psychedelic therapy (I have no fucking clue how this is legal or remotely ethical...), and more targeted apps and supplements for ADHD. In short - give up on your career, get on drugs.
I go there to look at cool art, and watch skate clips. And I get bombarded by "get a job" and "you're mentally ill". And it wears me down so much that I... I stay on the fucking site to try to keep scrolling to even out the feeling. To get more positive input than upsetting shit. But some days its just a losing battle.
Since my whole day was off, I planned to only get groceries and work on animation today. And I got the grocery list together and everything, went to checkout, then the delivery time options were all for tomorrow. It was already like... 8-8:30... The whole fucking day disappeared. I just tunnel-visioned on shit and got lost in my head, and missed the window. That shit frustrates me.
Days that sound like today? Super common for me. A massive downside to not having anyone in your life to like... break you out of your focus.
So... I'm gonna do groceries tomorrow. I made really dank quesadillas. I did a lot of animation and... finished the animation. I think. I'm pretty happy with it. And finishing that means... all that's left is an outro with my info on it, if I want to do that.
I'm tempted to redo the hiking footage. The footage I took in the trails right in the middle of the city? They have graffiti all over the trees. I didn't even notice when I was out there. And that's a huge faux-pas in all subcultures of society. That's just gross. You don't tag nature, you don't tag living things. It's so weird, it looks post-apocalyptic. And I don't like it in my video. Because I'm on the VO saying like... "I love nature, I always have, being in nature has been a huge part of my life..." and on the screen is a first person shot walking down a trail and there's an oak tree with some indecipherable black spraypaint scrawling on it that looks right out of Dawn of the Dead or some shit. Ugh.
So... I need to plan a trip to go to the National Forest and see some real nature again. I'm so goddamn overdue. I should just pick a day and reserve the car for it, as though I were making plans with someone else. Or making an appointment or something. Maybe that would help me pull the trigger on it. I think I'll bring the GoPro to get better footage too, the footage my phone took was absolute dogshit for some reason.
So yeah, that was basically my whole day. Wish I was exaggerating, it was like... the entire day. Sleep. Distraction. Sleep. Yoga. Distraction. Groceries. Cook. Eat. Work. Play Risk of Rain 2. Journal.
I might as well write about this too. Since it's 4:30 AM already anyway, it's not like I'm resetting my sleep schedule tonight. (How many thousands of times have I said that sentence...) I have been reflecting on the shit with my therapist. And why I was like... chomping at the bit to get that email to him. I get like that a lot. I get frantic, I write pages, I devote my entire self to like... trying to put out that fire. Here's the mechanism the best I can observe right now.
So... I've said the past few days that it's like a rock thrown into a pond, and then all the emotional ripples hit me. In the form of invasive thoughts and feelings. Just waves of them, varying degrees of intensity. And I can try to distract, or try to suppress, or try to let go... all with varying degrees of success. But it will come back. It always does. Because it's important.
These invasive things, they are very rarely... little things. They are usually incredibly important. Like... my deepest fears, my biggest struggles, my pains and nightmares, my trauma. They are big and they are unresolved.
And I... I kinda came to a conclusion I've come to several times before today. In those moments, I'm afraid I might have trouble distinguishing between importance and urgency. Because I... don't have structure. Like... I think this is so goddamn foreign to other people because their lives are so different than mine that they just... they can't relate to me at all.
Like... on my list of priorities today - work, groceries, shower, try to make time for myself... Where does "resolve the nagging conflict that happened with your therapist that they probably don't even know is eating you alive" fall on that list? How many days do I sit with that tapping on my shoulder every 2 hours... "hey, this dude thinks you're nuts because you got scared about leg pains when you live a sedentary lifestyle and have gotten a blood clot before."
I mean... it's an inner conflict, right? He probably has no clue it's still bothering me 3 days later. And that it's been haunting my dreams. All because of a 10 minute panic moment... that I actually overcame... that I dealt with... kinda in a crude way, but effectively. Like... it didn't bother me that night, it didn't bother me the next day. I brought it up because of how acute the reaction was. How powerful it was. It was facing death, it was... fucking jarring. But it didn't leave a lasting emotional scar, it didn't leave ripples. But this fucking did.
Because the context I put it in? I said I wish I had someone to call when I was scared like that. I just don't want to be alone in it, that's a life-goal of mine. I wish I could just talk to someone and go "hey, I'm kinda freaking out a bit... because like... an ER tried to take my leg off for something that felt a lot like this... and I don't know if this is really a dangerous situation or not? So... could you help me make sense of what I'm seeing?" Like... a friend, or a girlfriend. To just... see what they would do. Which I picture as a super normal thing, something I've had in my life before, and something I plan on having again. And he responded by like... urging me away from that expectation, and pushing me towards... crisis lines... and mentioning outpatient programs and shit? And I'm just like... yo, dude... Are you legit telling me this isn't a common problem?
You're going to tell me, in the age of Covid, that people not being sure if they're having serious medical symptoms and wanting to get a second opinion from a friend on whether they think they should call a doctor, because they don't want to waste valuable medical resources on a false alarm... is uncommon. Is a symptom of delusion or something? Like... really?!
That set off a lot of shit. Because that whole... defaulting to me being crazy and delusional? That's my family. That's where the dreams came from. And that's the haunting ripples I keep feeling. And as fucked up as the supremely intense facing death feeling was? I'd do it again in a heartbeat to make the "you're crazy and no one will ever be there to help reassure you when you're scared, if you want comfort you talk to a psychiatric nurse" bullshit stop. In a heartbeat.
So I get in this chaotic whirlpool of urgency. Because I just want these nasty narratives to leave me alone. The invasive thoughts, the memories, the... ghosts of the past... the way people think of me... the way people thought of me... The life I'm allowed to have. And all the nightmare memories attached to it. I just want them to stop. I want them to leave me alone. Because have 1 hour of talk with this dude, then 168 hours left alone with my thoughts until the next opportunity to even attempt to make sense of it. And these thoughts leave me alone, when they are at peace. When they are resolved.
So, yesterday, I just wanted him to understand how big of a problem it was for me that he jumped right into crisis mode. And treated this like it was... someone having a mental break or something. It really fucked with me. And still is. It made me feel unstable, and it made me feel like he... felt I needed to be institutionalized or some shit. It really upset me. I hate feeling like that so much. And I starkly disagree, I have been doing so much better considering the struggles I'm facing. I really thought I was on a good path, and things were on the upswing. However... this guy was a crisis counselor for over 5 years straight... I need to remember that. His response might have been force of habit.
So yeah, back to importance vs urgency. I do struggle with that when it comes to conflict resolution... because my analytic brain obsesses over interpersonal and psychological problems (you're literally witnessing it go full-tilt right now at almost 5AM, this process right here is what I'm talking about...) and treats them like puzzles to solve... and is constantly working on them. So when the thought/emotion ripples, the reminders, come back for their hourly visit... my analytic mind is ready to drop everything and just figure out the solution to this. So that I don't have to carry it anymore. And that is important, but is it... urgent? That's where I am now. And it's a really tough call.
For people who are adept at self-distraction? Important is not urgent. For people who repress, or avoid, or run... important is not urgent. But my conscience will pop up more notifications in my head than fucking Doordash trying to get me to use their damn app again. Like every damn hour. "Hey! It's important! Remember?!" DING. And I'll hit snooze until I can afford the time and resources to resolve it to my survival instincts' satisfaction. This affects my ability to focus, this affects my ability to get shit around the house done. But most importantly - this affects sleep.
You know the phrase - "How can you sleep at night?" Usually has to do with... guilt, right? Conscience-based stuff? Guilt, regret, shame, remorse, shit like that? Wishing you had done different, or done more? And I get that shit while I'm awake, constantly. So... my remedy to not be perpetually haunted by that, or perpetually in conflict with my inner self (which makes me physically ill when I am...) I... put in the extra work to work with my conscience. And try to find a solution. Like... right here, right now.
But when that involves closure with another person? Who doesn't have time for that resolution or closure? That's when I think it needs to shift from urgent to important. With interpersonal conflict, especially with those who have very busy lives. I need to learn how to shift things from urgent to important, to deal with my conscience's deep frustration about that, to cope with its impatience and interruption. And that's a skill... I am very clumsy with. Because I lack experience. I lack social experience. Because in my life, if something is important? I'm doing that. Not scheduling it for next month. And that's something I need to work on socially. And I am, and I'm getting better at it. I just... don't get a lot of opportunity to practice.
So yeah... I'm learning with this that... the page and a half I wrote for my therapist? That's information he needs to gather himself. And I need to just self-soothe, not do the learning of what really sets off my trauma shit for him. That's his job.
I went on tons of tangents here, I have no idea if it made sense, I'm still trying to figure out this really... fickle concept of importance vs. urgency. When things can wait and when they're like... "get this shit out of the way now."
I'll tell you this much, if I have ADHD... that inner invasive thought voice? That's the impulse-control issue component. That's the impatient, won't sit in his seat, bundle of emotions, driven by a motor part of me. 100%.
Welp... here's hoping for good dreams tonight, so I can get a full-night's rest. Good vibes to end this on? The animation I made? I started from scratch today and just did simple handdrawn animations in blender, and it actually came out pretty cool. Very barebones, but it got the job done better than I was envisioning. The project is taking shape, which is really nice. And soon... I'll be able to allow myself to move on to other projects... Soon... XD Any day now...
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rpbetter · 3 years
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I'm so tired of roleplaying with people who don't put half the commitment I do into our threads and muses. I'm so tired of feeling like I'm a weirdo or like I don't belong for that. Any other hobby and people wouldn't care if I took it seriously. Why is roleplaying different? How can I keep going like this if I'm getting rudeness from all sides? I can't even go outside my already tiny bubble and find more partners, because I always see people putting roleplayers like me down and it's exhausting.
"Why is roleplaying different?"
Well, Anon, I know that was a rhetorical question, but I have some thoughts on that. To the surprise of no one!
I strongly believe that this is an issue with how fandom has come to dominate roleplaying. As I've said before, it really wasn't always like that. Of course, you always had canon characters and almost all RPers were invested in a fandom or two. The difference was that online RP was once viewed much more like tabletop RPGs are.
When the RPC became a near-total offshoot of Fandom, a lot of shit changed and very rapidly...and within Fandom, a lot of shit was changing very rapidly as well at that time.
RP has always been something looked down on (though, at least no one ever accused written RP online of being literally demonic like they did DnD, or made correlations to murder sprees like they did LARPing, so there's that) as strange, not the good, understandable sort of dorky.
Part of that is almost certainly because of the difference in the way society views writing vs the way it views hobbies like gaming - writing is seen as an intellectual pursuit and a job, gaming, even at its most negative points of view in wider society, has been seen traditionally as a downtime activity only.
But. RP was not looked down upon from within Fandom or in roleplay communities themselves like it is now.
When the whole experience of fandoms themselves became extremely mainstream and open, it welcomed in a ton of shit ideas and behaviors that were not previously prevalent. It changed RP, too, along many of those same lines.
When your hobby is considered objectionably weird by people within the fandoms you love and RP in and that makes you a sort of lowest-tier fan, the viewpoint of RP to RPers becomes something lesser than a valid hobby. When RPers are the same people who engage with Fandom monetarily, anything not monetized is passively consumable content, including RP. And RPers are trying to both deflect shame and struggling with wider society's mixed messages, that now hit them everywhere online as well. Shit like, "you don't have to monetize your hobby, it's okay to just make really good cross stitches of memes for yourself" and "if you're not paying me, you have no control over me."
We seriously do not view RP as a proper hobby anymore, that's why. There are many factors to that, those are just few, but that's the ultimate answer. It's not seen that way because it's not valued in the same way.
I think much of the problem with muns losing their entire shit over anyone else approaching the hobby differently, dare I say...more seriously, is related to a lot of complex psychology about self-esteem, control, and anxiety. So many people here struggle with serious self-worth and confidence issues, and I think to many of them, whether they realize it or not, when they see serious RPers, they feel like that's an inherent judgment and a danger to their own enjoyment. Because RP, as writing, is a skilled hobby - the more you practice it, the more skilled you become with it. Meaning that someone who approaches the writing seriously is going to be at a higher skill level.
Enter the way we're training to think about writing again - when they see someone who is very practiced, skilled, and confident with their writing, the learned idea is that they're somehow superior in a nasty, personal way.
I most certainly do not think that makes it alright, it isn't, and I'm not very tolerant of it.
It's absolutely alright to engage with RP in any way you see fit. If that's extremely casual, it's a minor hobby for you, that's great! I'm so happy you're enjoying yourself, and I mean that in no facetious way. But not when that is the only form of it respected and accepted. It's just as alright to have RP as your primary, serious hobby!
The only way we can all enjoy a hobby with such great variance within it is by respecting each other's variables, not by vilifying them. It's recognizing that, no matter how much you enjoy the mun and/or muse, they're not engaging with the hobby in the way you are, it's not a good fit to write together. (Please, begging y'all to be friends with those who are different, not enemies, shit's sake. You've not got to write together to be friends!) Instead of labeling them and being hateful. Different =/= a threat.
And, to go off a bit lol y'all demonizing serious RPers really don't get that there are some intense tones of ableism and more going on in that narrative of yours, huh?
Not that anyone requires a reason to be serious about any hobby, but when people pick a hobby like RP as their primary one...you should probably have the maturity to consider why that is. Could it be that they focus on a hobby they can do from their homes and that requires low physical involvement, and has a degree of separation from direct socializing, for a reason?
Serious RPers tend to be limited in their ability to pursue other hobbies. Mental and physical health, region, finances, and ability to spend time outside of the home are all very common limits for those who "take RP too seriously/are addicted to RP."
Maybe take five seconds away from your own issues to consider that the person you're shitting on for something so minor as a difference of importance of a hobby might be the full-time caretaker of a special needs child, having to remain home and on a very small income. They might be chronically ill or suffer from agoraphobia. They might live in an area with no hobbies of interest, affordability, or at all...or they might live somewhere that is incredibly dangerous for them.
I honestly do not know where these people have been that they've been aggressed at by serious RPers, but that's usually the excuse. (I'm not saying it has never happened or does not happen, before anyone goes there.) The idea that serious RPers are extreme elitists who are demanding that other muns do what they do, how they do it. That they expect other muns to be online and RPing all the time, that they be "available for entertainment at all times" at the cost of real-life matters. Having the expectation that threads not be dropped constantly or that a writing partner not leave for months with no contact is neither of those things.
In over two decades of RPing across almost every platform type that has existed, I have literally never seen that be either a singular RPer-type problem or one that serious RPers are even more likely to deal in. I've seen the opposite, actually. Which is not a condemnation or a statement that all casual RPers do this, just what my experience has been. And one that actually stands to reason based on the way they view and engage with RP - quick replies, quick entertainment, and very low commitment to threads, muses, or other muns. Of course, it's annoying to them when a more serious RPer is unwilling to do rapid-fire style quick, short threads from an ask with them, but is writing the lengthy replies they already owed instead.
That's probably a factor as well, in here among a plethora of misunderstanding/unawareness of differences - for many serious RPers, it's not easier and more fun to write short, quick threads. So, what a casual RPer is seeing is that they're willing to put all this extraordinary effort into a massive reply to someone else while their easy, fun, quickly done thread is waiting in line.
Misunderstandings and unawareness breed hostility, period. And there is a hell of a lot of those things in the RPC.
What serious RPers are expressing are either boundaries/expectations or frustration. Not a demand that you be around all the time, but an expectation that you leave them alone if you're not also a serious RPer who will be committed to threads and muses. Not hostility and elitism, the frustration that it's already difficult to find muns who will work out before you add in the majority rule of casual RPers.
It's incredibly disheartening, frustrating, and honestly, a bit anxiety-inducing to constantly be the weird one, always have few choices, and to be at risk of being Problematic purely because you take the hobby seriously. You can't vent without someone jumping on your ass to remind you (even if you said numerous times that "real life comes first" and "people can do what they want") that omg, people have lives, people can do what makes them happy, it's just RP.
It's so upsetting when you think you might have found a good writing partner, then, you see a PSA they've reblogged about how it's a "hobby, not a jobby," and "no one owes anyone anything, ever." Excuse me, as that last one is a direct quote, let me redo it so it is verbatim: "no one owes anyone here anything - EVER !!!"
I said I wasn't very tolerant :)
But seriously, exactly what you've expressed is why I'm not...it's another form of controlling others instead of trying your best to control your own experience, and it's often extremely hateful. I'm not tolerant of anything like that, it's no longer supporting preferences at that point. When your preference is the only one that will be tolerated in the community, it's not a preference anymore.
It's something that makes others feel isolated, afraid of harassment, and depressed. It is a hobby and it isn't supposed to make you feel like that!
And, no, absolutely the fuck not lol the "answer" to this isn't that you're taking it too seriously and need to take a break. I'm so tired of seeing that shit tacked onto RPH responses and vents and PSAs. You're not saying that RP is making you feel this way, "just take a break and come back when you agree with everyone else" isn't a solution.
Of course, if you do feel like your time here has become so upsetting? Yeah, obviously, you should try to find some other things to supplement your downtime that make you feel happier again. Engage in some other forms of writing just meant for yourself, or that can be published as fics. Spend some more time on a game you enjoy for a while, or get invested in a new one. Learn to shape bonsai or make no-knead rolls. Whatever would make you happy as a hobby when you're not here.
Other than that, however, well...we're not going to be implying on this blog that you're too serious and need to take a hiatus until you have no emotional investment in your hobby. That's insane. I'd not say it about hiking, martial arts, dog obedience competitions, hobby farming, or painting either.
I wish I could think of some solutions as to where you could look that wasn't like this, but it's definitely the majority of the RPC. It doesn't help that, due to this, serious RPers have a tendency to quietly stick together and not venture out into the RPC. They're just not incredibly easy to find.
I will say that they tend to be:
novella - if you're not here for serious RP and sticking around for a while, you're not going to invest the time and energy into particularly lengthy writing
older RPers - I would say that twenty-five is probably the youngest, with early thirties to late forties being the majority
in fandoms with a large adult base of fans - even if it's a franchise friendly to, or even meant for, younger fans, if it has a particularly active adult fanbase, it's a better chance of finding serious RPers in it
as above, old fandoms - fandoms that have been around for a long time tend to have more serious RPers in them
fandomless OCs - tend to have a higher chance of being written by serious RPers than canons or heavily fandom-involved OCs
RPers who do not do a ton of advertising for their muse(s), but when they do, they don't advertise them based on activism points or trends
slightly more likely to not have an emphasis on highly aesthetic blogs, graphics, icons etc. - they use a modified basic tumblr theme, low on graphics, their aesthetics are not on-trend, for example
anti-content policing/"write what you want" style muns
muns with more extensive rules pages - they plan to be here for a while, they take writing, RP, and their muse(s) seriously, so, it's a bit more important to them to head off problems before they start
those with older characters/FCs - be that literally in age or the character being one that has existed for a long time
"stay in your lane" style muns - if they're opining on fandom or the RPC, they must really be angry about something
those with numerous and detailed headcanons - for example, their response to a HC meme ask like, "what's your muse's favorite ice cream flavor?" is going to be treated seriously, not simply answered with "mint chocolate chip because my bby is gross"
As usual, not a complete or perfect list. I don't fit some of the things on there! It could give you some things to look for when trying to find other serious RPers, though. It's based on observances from someone who was never a casual RPer, even as a minor (me, obviously), and maybe it could at least keep you from continuously running into hostility about your approach to RP.
I've honestly considered making a list of some sort expressly for RPers who are on the more serious end of the spectrum, but...in a RPC back when things were dominated by serious RPers, I did that sort of thing with a RPH I had, and it still got labeled as being a list for and by Elitists. I don't know that anyone would want to put themselves out there for potential harassment on tumblr, you know? It was a joke then, just having a group of RPers label you as an Elitist. Here, you get told to kill yourself, and none of us need more of that shit, right?
Try to hang in there, Anon, I know it's upsetting, and I'm so sorry that something fun has gotten to be like this.
Try to understand that these people are coming from a place of irrational defensiveness, often in response to bullying themselves at some point or feeling bad about themselves. That doesn't make it right, but it does make it easier to not take to heart.
And keep at it! In my experience here, once you find a group of people you fit into, it really is...A Group. Especially among RPers who are ostracized, they stick together, they promote each other, and they're very happy for their mutuals to become your mutuals. Once you find them, it unlocks so many opportunities for the interactions and type of RP you've been missing!
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unironicduncanstan · 3 years
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Randi’s Kustom Kandi! (Comes with free stickers!)
🌈💖 Hello, I’m a queer autistic low-income artist selling completely customized Kandi bracelets for $1 a piece ! 💖🌈
😘 Details and how to start your order below 😘
💲 COST: Pony bead bracelets, with colors, b&w words, or plain star beads, are $1 each, no taxes, just $1.00 flat. The use of colored letters and iridescent stars are $1.25. As of right now to keep stock up, bracelets consisting of Only star beads aren’t available to order. Charm options are not yet available, but will eventually be added, and prices may range. This is all just based on how much it costs to buy the beads to make these bracelets! 💲
📦 SHIPPING: Each order will end up with a different estimate for shipping costs, based on where you live, and how many bracelets you order. I ship through USPS and I should be able to ship almost anywhere, but the further away you are, the higher shipping will be. I’m shipping out of Kansas. Domestic shipping will probably start at around $3 - $8, international shipping will just have to depend. If you want an estimate before starting an order, just give me your address and an idea of how many bracelets you might want, and I’ll get back to you asap. 📦
🤷‍♀️ AVAILABILITY: I have a full rainbow array of pony beads including b&w, some neons and pastels too, I have a nice color range of star beads including b&w and transparent, and some iridescent star beads as well, and then for letters I have black on white, white on black, color on black and color on white. A lot of these can be seen in the example image above!  🤷‍♀️
IMPORTANT TO NOTE;;; My pony beads are all around 6x4mm, and the letter beads are 6x6mm. This is considered somewhat Small for kandi bracelets. This isn’t a choice I made to skimp out, this size is actually more expensive and harder to find than the usual 6x9mm, I just very much prefer this size to work with and wear. It’s only a tad bit more subtle, but it fits most people a lot better and I would Definitely recommend it for people with smaller wrists or who are just starting out with Kandi.
🤔 HOW TO ORDER: So basically, how you choose to tell me the pattern you want is up to you, you can draw it out if you want or just try to explain it with words, or whatever else works. Once you explain what you want, I’ll show you what beads I have that match your request, and you can decide what you want out of those options. 
An example could be; “I would like a bracelet with a repeating pattern of red and blue pony beads, with the word PLUR in black on white letters, and two pink stars on each side, just like this!” 
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To which I might say; “Ok, here I have 2 shades of red and 4 shades of blue, and I have plain pink stars or iridescent pink, which ones would you like me to use?” and then I’d show you a picture of all of these colors for you to decide! Once we have all your bracelets planned out, I’ll ask for a few more details to give you your total price. Then once the payment goes through, I’ll start working! Whenever your bracelets are all complete, I’ll send you pictures of the finished products to make sure you like them (if not I’ll redo at no extra charge). After you give the OK, I’ll ship them out! (You can also ask for some ‘random/surprise me’ bracelets if you aren’t sure of any patterns, of course.)
What I have in stock might vary, I will try to update this post as that goes, so please make sure to visit this posts SOURCE instead of a reblog before you start an order to check for availability. Please send your order requests to THIS blog, through PM if you can. If you want an alternate way of communication, contact me however you can and we’ll go from there. I have discord, facebook messenger, email, etc. 🤔
🤷🏻 WHAT ELSE I NEED: When confirming your order, I’ll need your shipping address. I’ll then be able to calculate shipping cost and give you a full price. (Again, zero hard feelings if you can’t afford the price I give, like, bad vibes in the NEGATIVES, been there done that, and I’ll be available if you ever do have the funds, but please understand I can’t change shipping costs, I really would make it free if I could.) After that I’ll ask for your paypal and send a payment request, once that payment goes through is when I start your order! I’ll have to ask a few more questions, like your wrist measurements (or an estimate, since the bracelet is made of elastic it’ll have a decent amount of stretch, but this may warp how spaced your beads are if it’s too inaccurate.), and i’ll need your first and last name (it doesnt have to be a legal name, just something to put on your package). 🤷🏻
📫 SHIPPING TIME: Once again, this will depend on how far you are, and because of c0v1d it may be more delayed than expected. I’ll try to send you a tracking number as soon as your item ships. 📫
📿 CHARMS: If you’d like more options, the best solution I’ve been able to think of for now is that if you’d like, you could surf Ebay, Etsy, Etc. till you find some charms you’d want me to use, and then if you’re okay with covering the cost to get them (typically $5 to $15 for a decent lot) and then waiting a bit extra for me to receive them, I would have no problem using those for you! :) Someday I’d really like to stock up on popular charms to have more choices available, but I don’t quite have the funds quite yet. Thank you for your understanding. 📿
😷 ALLERGY/SENSITIVE SKIN NOTICE: I seal small parts of my bracelets to reduce the chance of breakage. I use a very tiny drop of Loctite Super Glue Gel on the knot. This glue does not keep the beads from moving freely or lock them into place, it’s used sparingly as a sealant. If you ever receive a bracelet that is locked or sticky, I would fully refund you and offer to send another. You can also absolutely opt out of this, Just add “No glue” somewhere to your order. Just be warned that your bracelet will be less protected from breakage. 😷
❗ DISCLAIMER: Either way, I cannot take responsibility for a bracelet eventually breaking down. Kandi and elastic bracelets in general are a bit prone to snapping, but mostly over time and especially if used in rave settings. I use high quality jewelry elastic from amazon, very high rated and recommended by other Kandi makers, and I knot them 3 times, so mine should last as long as they possibly can. Please make sure your wrist measurements are as accurate as they can be, and please be gentle when taking them on or off, just being careful will help prolong it’s usage by a lot. Now if a bracelet arrives broken, I will of course replace it, no extra charge. ❗
🦄 STICKERS: Order 5 bracelets and get one free sticker! Order 10 and get two, so on and so forth in a pattern of 5. The stickers are hand cut by me from large books and sheets, so the edges might look odd but the sticker itself should be unharmed. These are completely random, and based loosely around a scenecore aesthetic. Most are pretty ‘medium’ sized, but they do range quite a bit. 🦄
✍ CONTENT: Kandi, scene and rave culture, is in a general sense, a very upbeat and supportive based environment. I do not want to make bracelets with negative messages on them. I will obviously NEVER make any with hate speech or rude remarks, but beyond that, please keep your phrases positive. If you want something thats meant to fight hate, like “kill all n*zis” or something, I'm not opposed to that as it’s for justice, it’s just that most Kandi is focused on ‘happy party vibe’ messages. As far as media or interests, like if you want a bracelet that says “Gir” or “100 gecs”, or uses ship names, etc. I will not deny you any interest you choose. BUT, I am personally uncomfortable with d.dl/g and won’t make bracelets based on that, nor will I ever make bracelets supporting ped0ph1lic or 1ncestu0us content, including if they’re based on medias or fictional ships. As far as pride bracelets, I would LOVE to make those for you, and I will Never deny working with your identity, pronouns, etc. once again, unless it’s a p/ed0 flag or something. I will never deny working with any mental or physical disability/illness or other kind of divergency pride. Race and/or religion pride is also great except for “White pr1de” because of the violent connotations behind that concept. NSFW Kandi is fine, cussing is fine, I hope this goes without saying but please only ask for Kandi with a slur on it if you can reclaim that slur, and overall, just be mindful with what you ask for if you plan to wear it in public settings like raves. If you have any controversial ideas you felt this didn’t cover, please feel free to ask, I will not get angry at you for your request, even if I have to deny it. ✍
Thank you for reading! I look forward to doing business with you 😊
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moonlit-mizukage · 3 years
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Chapter Seven: Wait, you have a basement?
Summary: Y/n and Tendou are deeply in love. Living on the other side of Tokyo now, the Monsters are still up to their old shit. They even opened a few businesses for Tax reasons. Even though it’s been almost three years later, Y/n still has never been able to understand how they have avoided the law several times. When Tendou’s Mother reappears in his life, Y/n is confused as Tendou claimed she is dead. Finding out Tendou is being forced to take over the family business by his Mother, she soon learns the truth behind Tendou’s reason he never gets in legal trouble is his family business. His mother is quick to decline Y/n as his future wife and tries to set up Tendou with someone she sees more fit. What will happen to Y/n and Tendou? What will happen to Tendou’s “family business”? What does this mean for the future of the Monsters?
TW: Swearing, blood SLIGHT DISMEMBERMENT and BODY HORROR, body parts. 
An: Sorry this is late I was helping out a friend !! 
Word count: 1K
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Third Person Pov 
“Alright, take him to the basement.” Tendou ordered. 
“Wait, you have a basement?” Y/n asked. 
“It’s not something you want to see Paradise.” He said as he kissed your forehead. 
Matsukawa tossed the man over his shoulder and walked inside. The others followed him inside. 
Y/n looked around the newly discovered basement for her. Weapons of all sorts were around the room. She watched as the men opened up a room. Inside the room was just a chair. Matsukawa tossed the man down as he began to use the leather restraints on the chair to hold him down. 
“Is this room what I think it’s for Satori?” She asked. 
“Blood stains like these don’t create themselves babe.” Matsukawa spoke up first. 
After the man was secure in the chair they locked the room and headed up stairs. The members you were with were now in the living room with kenma on the couch asleep. The others sat down around the room as well. 
“So who’s going to torture the fuck for information? Matsukawa has to sit this one out.” Tendou said. 
“Wait why?” He asked. 
“Cause we have some men to hunt down with mad.” 
“And me.” Terushima said. 
“I’ll do it.” Suna spoke up. “He hurt my best friend, I’ll give him hell, don’t worry.” He added with a sadistic smile. 
“I will too, as long as Y/n watches Kenma.” Shirabu said. 
“Hell no, Maki will watch Kenma. I am helping too.” Tendou gave y/n a surprised look. 
“Damn alright, thats fucking hot.” Tendou said. 
“Do I get a say?” Hanamaki asked. 
“Nope.” Y/n said as she began to leave the room. “Let’s go wake him the fuck up.” 
“Alright Monsters, let’s go find the other fucks.” Tendou said as he left with the other three. 
The three went back down to the basement as the man still was unconscious. 
"Perfect. We need to strip him and I didn't want him awake." Shirabu said. 
"Even the boxers?" Suna asked. 
“No leave those on." Y/n and Suna undid the foot holds to pull his pants down quickly. Redoing them back up they undid both arms and pulled his jacket and shirt off.  
Shirabu was out if the room grabbing some materials as he came back inside. 
"This should be enough." He brought in a moving tray table with him with everything on top. 
"Should we dump water or slap him awake?" Suna asked. 
"I got a better idea." The two men turned to look at y/n as she was holding bolt cutter in her hand. She smiled up at them sadistically as they both stepped back for her to be able to get to him. 
She placed the bolt cutters on either side of his large tow on his left foot. 
The sound echoed through the room as she used her strength to cut fully through. The man was soon woken up in a panic. Y/n stood up, now had some blood splattered on her face. Shirabu bent down to handle the wound to make it so he wouldn't bleed out before they got what they wanted.  
"WHO ARE YOU WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO ME?" He began trying to stand up in his chair. 
"Oh shut the fuck up. I know you were the one that stabbed our friend so now you are going to tell us what we want to know." Suna said. 
"Please I know nothing!" 
"Shut the fuck up." Y/n spat at him. Suna pulled a small table from the arm of the chair and placed the man's hand on it. Suna pulled out a metal clamp as he began to screen it tight on the table. Placing the man's middle finger in it and he tightened till the man screamed. Suna stopped to look at the blood starting to form underneath the metal hold. 
"We are going to ask you some questions, and every time we feel you are hiding something, we break one finger with our hammer here." Y/n said as she showed off the hammer. 
"Why Kenma?" Suna asked before anyone could say another word. 
"I don't! He was just alone, that's why I went for him!" Suna grabbed another hammer of the tray and smashed the hammer down quickly on his pinky finger. The man let you a horrific scream. 
"As a professional liar, I know when a mother fucker is lying. So tell me the fucking truth unless you want more smashed fingers, okay?" Suna said with his sadistic smile. 
"Our boss, he said he was the weakest guy." 
"Who the fucks your boss?!" Y/n yelled in his face. 
"I-I don't know." She slammed the hammer head down on his pointer finger.  
"I SAID THE FUCK IS YOUR BOSS ASSHOLE!" She screamed. 
"I CAN'T TELL YOU!" He screamed as tears formed in his eyes. 
"He seems pretty weak, must be a low level of some type." Shirabu said as the other two nodded in agreement. 
"Pass me the bolt cutters." Y/n said as she squared on the floor. Shirabu passed them over as she bent down to his toes again. Lining them up he yelled before she could do anything more. 
"FINE OKAY!! ILL TELL YOU I HAVE A FAMILY! PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!" Y/n slammed them shut, cutting off two little toes in the process. He let out another scream. She stood up facing him. 
"Then tell us fuck head." She said. 
"He runs the other side of the town's Yakuza. They moved here recently and have been trying to take out your side for full control here."
"Who gave you the orders then?" Y/n asked. 
"Some cop!" 
"Oh really? What's his name?" She asked. 
"Sawamura. He works at the Tokyo police department."
"Perfect. That's all we needed to know." She said. 
"So you will let me go now?" He asked with a hint of excitement in his tone. 
"He's seen our faces." Shirabu said back to the other two. 
"Guess we will have to kill him then huh?" Suna said with a sadistic laugh as the other two smirked at one another. 
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Previous | Masterlist | Next  
Taglist:  @satan-ruler-of-hells @atria-avior @freakydeaky226 @ems1des @idontknow-whatto-callthis @maer-333 @bruh-kill-me @elianetsantana @tanakasimpcorner @babyshoyo​ @ash-levi​​ @ifilosemyselfagain @wisteria-wooseok @ashytoes101 @fantasycantasy @angstyclowns @johnnysactualgf @putmeinyourdeathnote @sunflow3rbab3 @black-rose-29 @sageinlove @mykuronekome  
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oikawaplssteponme · 4 years
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The Apartment: part 2
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▪️part 1
pairing: Kuroo Tetsurou x fem! reader
ratings/warnings: swearing
synopsis: You knew that living with your three best friends, Kuroo, Oikawa, and Bokuto, would be a wild ride. It’s never a dull moment with those three. Let’s just hope you can keep your huge crush on Kuroo a secret when he is only a room away.
a/n: hiii💓 enjoy part 2! im excited for the next part, it’s gonna get interesting ;)) as always, requests/asks are open and so is the taglist! just ask and ill add you :) enjoy xx
Two: clean up good
You had made it through your first week at your new place. It was easy to make yourself feel at home with your friends around. It was a lazy Saturday morning. You and Kuroo were making breakfast while Bokuto was at the gym and Oikawa was still asleep after a 7 hour facetime call with Iwaizumi the night before. You pranced around the small kitchen gathering stuff for breakfast as Kuroo washed the dishes.
“Did we ever end up buying orange juice?” you asked.
“Yeah it should be in the back of the fridge,” he explained. You headed over to the fridge and grabbed the juice. Kuroo went over to set the table and you tried not to get distracted by him. His perfect bedhead and raspy morning voice took your breath away.
“What?” he asked, noticing you staring. You jumped.
“Uh the tag of your pants is showing,” you said, which was true. Kuroo spun around himself as if to try and see the tag and you just laughed. Kuroo tucked the tag back in his pants.
“Geez Y/N, why are you looking at my ass?” he joked. Your face got hot.
“I was making sure Oikawa didn’t steal it,”
“What did I steal?” said a sleepy Oikawa, who just woke up. Kuroo covered his mouth in an attempt to not laugh.
“Oh nothing. Breakfast’s ready,” you smiled. Kuroo and Oikawa went to sit down and you handed them their plates of food.
“Did Bokuto say when he would be back?” you asked. Kuroo shrugged.
“Not sure, he said-”
“HEY HEY HEY!” The door slammed open to reveal a sweaty Bokuto holding his volleyball bag.
“Perfect timing Bo,” you smiled. Bokuto set down his bag and went to join all of you at the table. You began to eat your breakfast.
“Guys I have the greatest idea,” bursted out Oikawa. Kuroo looked at him with wide eyes and a mouth full of food.
“And what might that be?” Kuroo muffled out. Oikawa stood up from his seat and cleared his voice.
“We should have a party!” Oikawa exclaimed. You looked at Kuroo and Bokuto, then back at Oikawa.
“A party?” Kuroo questioned.
“Yes, a party. Ever been to one Kuroo?” Teased Oikawa.
“Hey I’ve been to a party!”
“A study group with drinking doesn’t count dumbass,” Oikawa huffed, “anyway we should have a little party. Nothing too crazy. Just an excuse to get some people over here and to dress up.”
“Oikawa I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I have 3 friends and they are all in this room,” you said. Kuroo laughed.
“You are so lame,” joked Kuroo. You rolled your eyes.
“I’m down to have a party,” chimed in Bokuto.
“Thank you Bokuto! Come on guys, we can dress up and invite some people and have a little fun. It can be like a house-warming party,” said Oikawa.
“I mean it doesn’t sound too bad. When would we have it?” You asked.
“Tonight!” exclaimed Oikawa.
“Tonight? Isn’t that a little short notice?”
“Let’s be honest. None of you had plans anyway so we might as well do it today. And I already told Iwachan that the party’s today,” smiled Oikawa.
“Okay so what’s the plan?” asked Bokuto, becoming instantly excited.
“I’m taking Y/N shopping with me for outfits for everyone. Kuroo you clean and Bokuto you are on food duty. I’ll make some calls and you guys invite whoever else you want,” explained Oikawa.
“Why do you get to pick what we wear?” questioned Kuroo.
“Because I know damn well that if I let anyone of you pick your outfits the three of you would each end up wearing sweatpants and that is not how I would like people to see my new apartment.”
“Shittykawa you do know we live here too right?”
“Precisely why I won't have you looking like idiots. Okay party is at 7 tonight so get a move on! BREAK!” Oikawa clapped and left the table. You looked at Kuroo and Bokuto.
“Well I guess I’ll see you two later. Have fun cleaning,” you smiled.
“Of course he gives me that worst job,” pouts Kuroo.
“Hey, at least that means you get to read the labels on the cleaning supplies and judge them,” joked Bokuto. Kuroo gave Bokuto a playful push before getting up from the table too.
After you finished eating, you took a bath and got dressed to go shopping with Oikawa. Just to annoy him, you wore a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt.
“Toru, are you ready?” You shouted. Oikawa came into your room, nicely dressed of course, holding Kuroo’s car keys.
“Let’s go before he notices,” he whispers. You laughed and started heading towards the front door.
“OIKAWA!”
“GO GO!” You and Oikawa ran so fast out of the apartment you almost tripped over yourselves. You hopped in the elevator.
“Kuroo is gonna kill you one of these days,” you said. Oikawa chuckled.
“Not if I get him first.”
~
You and Oikawa drove until reaching the store that Oikawa wanted to shop at. You went inside and began looking around.
“What are you buying for Kuroo and Bokuto?” You asked. Oikawa hummed to himself as he looked at the array of dress shirts before him.
“I really want to force Bokuto to wear a nice lavender button down with some grey pants. And as for Kuroo...I’ll see what you pick out first,” he explained. You sighed and went to look at the dresses.
None of the dresses really caught your attention. A lot of them looked too plain for you or Oikawa’s liking. As much as you hated to admit it, as you looked through the dresses you couldn’t help but think about what Kuroo might like. He probably couldn’t care less about what you wore but the thought of him noticing you made your heart flutter.
“Y/N!” called Oikawa. You turned around to see Oikawa holding a beautiful dress. It was made out of a shiny, almost silk-like material with thin straps. It was a gorgeous shade of red and had black lace along the v-neckline.
“You have to get this one,” said Oikawa. You took the dress from his hands and took a closer look. It really was a beautiful dress.
“Do you think it’s too much?” You asked.
“Of course not. You would look amazing in it. And it’s red...you know who likes red?” he teased. You smiled, knowing how Kuroo always complimented you when you wore red.
“I don’t know...do you think he’ll like it?”
“I know that the second he sees you in that he will confess his undying love for you.”
“Oikawa, I doubt he likes me.”
“Maybe seeing you in this dress will change his mind. Come on just get it!” You looked down at the dress.
“I’ll get it, but only because I like it,” you said. Oikawa nodded.
You bought the dress and Oikawa bought some stuff for Kuroo and Bokuto. The two of you headed back to your apartment. As you walked down the hall leading towards your door, you could smell smoke and hear yelling. You looked at Oikawa and shrugged as you opened the door.
“YOU BURNT IT?” Shouted Kuroo.
“I DIDN'T MEAN TO!” Pleaded Bokuto.
“Alright children what happened?” You asked. Kuroo and Bokuto stood in the kitchen looking at each other.
“Well you see Y/N, I was making the rice and then I decided to go to the bathroom and then I decided to sit on the couch and before I knew it I was asleep. And then I was very RUDELY woken up by Kuroo,” explained Bokuto.
“The rice is incredibly over cooked by the way,” said Kuroo.
“Thanks for the clarification,” you joked, “it’s fine Bokuto, I can remake the rice.”
“Thank you Y/N!” Bokuto picked you up for a tight bear hug.
“Well while Y/N redoes the rice, you boys can go get dressed,” Oikawa handed Kuroo and Bokuto their bags of clothes.
“I swear if you bought me-“ began Kuroo.
“Have faith my dear friend. You will look almost as good as me tonight,” smiled Oikawa. Kuroo rolled his eyes and took the bag. Kuroo and Bokuto headed towards their room to get changed. Oikawa did the same and you went to fix the rice catastrophe.
~
After you made the rice, you cleaned up around the kitchen. You washed your hands and checked the time. It was getting close to 7, so you rushed over to your room to change.
“Oikawa I'm coming in,” you said before opening the door. Oikawa was finishing buttoning up his shirt. He wore a light blue button up shirt and dress pants. He looked amazing as always.
“Do these pants make my ass look good?” He asked. You looked at the pants, seeing no significant difference in his butt.
“Absolutely. You have such a dump truck back there,” You laughed.
“I hate you,” Oikawa gave you a playful nudge before leaving your room. You took the dress out of the bag and laid it on your bed. It really was a beautiful dress.
You changed into the dress and stood in front of your mirror. The dress fit you perfectly, hugging you in all the right places. You put on a simple silver necklace and did a light face of makeup. You thought you looked beautiful. You felt beautiful.
You took a deep breath and opened your bedroom door to meet your friends. You didn’t dress up often. After all, your best friends are a bunch of guys. So if they didn’t feel the need to dress up, neither did you.
You walked out the door and Bokuto, Kuroo, and Oikawa stood in the living room, hyping each other up. Bokuto was very pleased with his lavender shirt and he looked great. No surprise that Kuroo took your breath away. He wore a neatly pressed navy shirt and dark grey dress pants.
“Hi boys,” you smiled. They turned to look at you. Each of their jaws dropping one by one.
“Damn sexy, who are you trying to impress tonight?” cheered Bokuto. You covered your face out of embarrassment.
“No one...” you whispered.
“I knew that dress would look perfect on you!” said Oikawa, giving himself all the credit.
“Wow…” Kuroo’s voice trailed off. You two locked eyes for a split second.
“We clean up good,” you smiled. Oikawa grabbed your hand and pulled you into a group hug with Kuroo and Bokuto. You held your friends tightly before breaking away. You turned to look at the front door, hearing someone knocking.
“Alright idiots, let’s get this party started.”
[taglist OPEN: @vangoghpoets @vangoghmusings @lilnuances @nerdybreadcollaborative @cloudswritings @foxyyychan @tamaguchi @jessie9008 @bitandbytes ]
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cherrykano · 4 years
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i’ve had some people tell me they’re interested in learning how to make carrds but they don’t understand the interface. lucky for you i have no life and spend all my time reformatting mine, so here's your comprehensive guide! this is gonna be long, so strap in. feel free to send any questions my way, ill try my best to answer + update this
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this is the first thing you'll see when making a new carrd. these formats are nice and all, but they’re kinda boring. were gonna start from scratch, so click the dotted box at the top right, or ‘blank canvas’ from the text box in the middle
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now you have this blank screen with a menu bar at the top right. we’ll go over that first!
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plus (add element) - adds a new element (we expand on that later) curved arrows (undo and redo) - pretty self explanatory play (preview animations - shows you what the site will look like when booted up, if you’ve added any animations phone (mobile view) - shows what the site will look like on mobile floppy disc (publish) - publishes the site. when there are unsaved changes, a green dot will appear here 3 lines (menu) - additional actions
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here are our elements, aka everything we can add to the site. im only going to go over the free ones here
text - adds a text box image - adds an image video - adds a video. can be uploaded from your device or embedded from a link audio - adds an audio clip embedded from a link gallery - adds multiple images you can click between timer - adds a countdown to a certain time or date list - adds a bulleted or numbered list buttons - adds buttons that can link internally or externally links - same as buttons, but formatted like a text box icons - same as buttons, but smaller icons table - adds a table divider - adds a line or spacer between elements
container - a customizable box that helps with formatting control - adds pages, headers, and footers
we’re going to be using the first few and the last two the most, so ill go over those in depth a little later
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publish - see above start over - resets the entire carrd. DON’T CLICK THIS!! you’ll lose all your progress (don’t worry, you can undo it)
background - settings for the background page - settings for the middle of the page, where all your elements go
documentation - gives you a bunch of tutorials, but thats what you're here for! instructions - goes over everything i just talked about, in a visual view. big recommend if you’re still a little confused
dashboard - goes back to the main carrd site. make sure to save before doing this
great, now that you understand that menu, lets go onto the properties panel. this is how you customize your site!
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this panel will look a little different depending on what element you’re editing, but the main layout is the same
top buttons - switch between menus arrows - move where the panel shows up on the screen bold text - tells you what type of menu this is (in this case, it’s text) layered boxes - duplicates the element trash can - deletes the element done - exits the panel. you can also just click another one, it will save either way
there are a few different menus, all with different settings. most of these (like text, links, and appearance) are pretty self explanatory, or come with instructions. the confusing ones are mainly container and control, so lets talk about those.
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there are two types of containers - default and columns. default is just a box that you can put multiple elements in. columns allows you to make different sections within the container, and put elements in them. it also allows you to make a section ‘spacer only,’ which means nothing can go in it
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here’s an example of a container from my commission site. as you can see, the 3 text boxes are sitting side by side, each in its own column !
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when you add a control, it adds a line that cuts through the entire page. there are a few different types of control elements
section break - adds a break in the page. anything below a break will be unaccessible unless linked to on the home page header marker - adds a section that is on the top of the site on every page. you can turn the header off from an individual pages’ properties panel footer marker - same as the header, except on the bottom of the page instead of the top scroll point - adds a section within the page you can link to. it will be shown on the page whether you link to it or not.
to link to a page, you add ‘#(page title)’ without the parenthesis or any spaces. this code is what's shown on the blue control bar (’#section01′ on the image above)
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to end this off, here’s my commission carrd as an example of all these elements working together
the red and black stripes are part of the background, the grey box in the center is the page, the titles and footer are filled in containers with borders, the contact links are buttons, and the information is all in text boxes!
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yanderemommabean · 4 years
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Do you think you could do a part 2 of that virus Au with dabi and shiva? Or somthing different with just dabi- whichever u prefer!
(I went on the just Dabi route for this one! I uh, have little brain energy currently, so pardon the misspellings if there are any and pardon the bad pacing! ))
He hates to admit it aloud, but yes, he finds things adorable. What?! He has an image to keep up! Ya know, badass, emo, uncaring and murderous! He has to look at least a bit intimidating!
Cats? Adorable. Dogs? Adorable. You trying to get away from his touch at every turn as if you have a chance? Fucking adorable. Your constant fighting is down right adorable and cute because you think you can take him on being quirkless.
Right now he has you in his lap, squeezing you against his chest with a bone crushing hug, the nausea from the virus disappearing completely as soon as he’s able to have you in his grasp.
People think that pain, confusion, delirium and worse symptoms are just horrible with this virus, but In his mind it wouldn’t be any different. He’s sure even if he didn’t have the illness he’d be just as sick, just as in pain. Dabi is sure fate would make you two end up together in the end either way, and Shigaraki can bitch and moan all he wants, Dabi knows in his heart you were meant to be his.
“Holding you is the best cure...” he mumbled out loud, distracted as his fingers play with your hair and tug it gently. He loves the music that is your breathing, the blessing that is your lips moving to say his name, and how his inner predator growls at how he wants to protect and provide for you. He wants to sink his teeth into your pretty little neck and draw blood, taste the divine that is your skin and essence until his lips and teeth are stained.
A huge bite such as that should prove he owns you.
No one will come near you with such a mark, and just thinking about it makes his aches and pains go away. “I can be your cure too. Undo all the brainwashing those asshole hero’s did to you”.
You wince as he gives kisses up and down your neck and shoulder, biting your tongue when a protest tried to crawl up your throat. The muffled noise was seen as more out of embarrassment than resentment, you could sense the smile on his lips, and knew a cocky, arrogant remark was about to follow.
“No need to be so shy. I gotcha, mmm daddy Dabi isn’t gonna let you go baby”.
He licked a stripe up your neck and purred, rolling his hips up against your ass, coaxing out a noise that made him want to break his restraint and make you a complete and utter puddle of bliss on the floor by the time he’s done. He’s utterly smitten with you, but where’s the fun if he can’t control himself?
“Oh? Does my little runaway like that? Are you needy for me?”.
“Fuck off” you hissed out, trying to hide your arousal by clenching your thighs together, balling up fists of your shirt to keep from clawing at him.
“God you make me crazy” he huffs, clearly turned on. “I watched you for months and you still make me hard by just a little back-talk. God, you’re so amazing”.
He began to kiss you roughly, growling deep in his throat as he holds you by the throat with one hand “I love you so fucking much- god damn kisses aren’t enough. I want you to fall apart for me”.
He truly did. You were his ray of sunshine, his reason to keep going, the reason to stay in the league and show the world he can take on anything. You invigorated him and made him mad with lust and need, and soothed the aches in his bones with every look and insult you threw at him.
You were more than an adorable, rebellious lover. You were fucking irresistible, making him desperate and weak in the best of ways.
He’s only human. He can’t hold back anymore, and begins to slide his hand down to your hips, teasing the lining of your pants, watching as you jerk and twitch at the tickling warmth. He just wants you to feel like you’re as special as he sees you, can’t you let his fingers work their magic?
“I need you, baby, I need you so bad it hurts”. His voice was so desperate, so needy, it was a stark contrast to his usual demeanor. Dabi began to undo the button on your pants, adjusting you in his lap as he did so “I want to make you mine. Protect you. You’ve been nothing but betrayed and hurt and I want to only spoil you baby”.
He began to go on a rant, getting angry and slamming you on the table “it made me so upset to see you used and abused. God they’re all gonna burn and scream for what they’ve done”.
You scramble for words but stop cold in your tracks when he grabs your hand and places it on his heart. There was a definite pitter against your palm, the organ beating hard against his rib cage. “Feel how fast I beat for you kitten? Feel how much I adore you?”. His hooded eyes had an odd look to them, something that wasn’t human anymore.
No, this man was completely gone. What lies inside this villain isn’t human anymore, just a virus with a host to take what it wants. A crazed puppet with sick desires.
Your back is pressed back against the tabletop, throwing items out of the way as he dived in for a rough and demanding kiss, grinding harder against you as his body slides between your legs. “Mm-“ another kiss “I’ll kill for you-“ another kiss “baby I need to make you feel good-“ he said frantically, hands yanking down your pants, breath becoming increasingly uneven and labored as the kisses continue.
You squeal feeling a sharp, abrupt pain. His teeth had sunk into your skin, definitely breaking it. A pleased and possessive noise reverberates against your shoudler while a tongue laps up whatever blood bubbles to the surface. “I can’t get enough of you-you’ll always be the one I want to smell, hear, see, and taste”. Dabi snakes a hand down to your underwear, teasing the outside as the table creaks and rocks with his frantic kisses exploring your upper body and trailing lower.
Having you underneath him like this made him lose all resolve. He needed to taste you, make you see stars, see that he loves you and that you’re all he could ever ask for. He loves you. You don’t seem to believe that, but he’ll prove it. Sometimes actions speak louder than words.
“I love you more than anything,” he admitted, fingers gripping into your hips and yanking you lower off the table to meet his face “and I’m gonna prove it”.
(Ugh I’ll have to redo this at some point and make it better than it is I’m sorry bby-Mommabean ))
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the-slasher-files · 4 years
Text
My Verisons - Slashers pt 1
INCLUDES JASON
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Just my opinion. Everyone interprets them differently but this is how I see the slashers. Some of this is based specifically on a certain movie in a series or could be just inspiration I’ve gotten from other writers. If you read my writing this will probably make sense of them, just seeing things from my perspective. This includes if they can talk, appearance, how you met, how/why you are together, nature/character, dead or alive or both, etc. Also please let me know if you feel the same or have different opinions! I am always curious about how others see them! 
JASON VOORHEES
appearance:
I adore the look of Jason from part 7 and Manhattan with classic elements. The size and shape perfect from those movies. However, to me, Jason would wear worn out jeans and some sort of button up with a utility belt of some kind, closer resembling the outfit from part 6. He always wears his work or hiking boots. Also probably always wears his gloves while outside
To me, Jason is more alive than dead, but just with the regeneration powers. He has very heavy scarring on half of his face that goes down his neck and side. Some wounds you don't think will ever heal still remain. On his back he is scarred by god knows what could be from defending the camp, or from the decomposition process. It looked like he had been attacked by a bear. Some wounds exposing the muscle and some you could see bone. 
His skin is a greyish colour but you can still tell there is some kind of blood flow because of his ability to get hard, plus I feel sometimes he might blush
His dick is a big one to put it frank lol. like 8 inches and thick. He doesn't have any hair down there or really anywhere.
his nature/character:
I honestly believe if you manage to get on his good side, he is such a sweet person. No matter what baggage you come with he will never judge because he was bullied and tormented. 
I feel he might have some form of mental illness because of his past and loneliness from not having anyone around. (separation anxiety, abonnement issues, maybe some depression in the winter)  
Once he has his person, he will never let go and the thought of losing you is literally crippling. It is his worst fear, so he does everything in his power to make you safe and stay with him.
He will listen to absolutely everything and try to understand everything from your perspective, except when it comes to your safety that is his number one priority even if it makes you upset.  
He is a very hard worker 
Extremely respectful of his person, whether it’s of their space or stuff, it doesn’t matter
A very gentle giant with you. I would use the expression “he would never hurt a fly” but we all know that is not the truth
I feel he might have a creative side to him, maybe it’s writing since he can’t express himself fully, maybe he can really draw, maybe it’s woodworking, I could even see him playing an acoustic guitar that he had stolen. He is completely self-taught
He is extremely curious about everything except other humans or the city
He also thinks Humans are a waste, all they do is destroy, fuck and hurt one another. Not to mention what they do to his woods
Big animal lover. I feel like he might have taken a dog once from the campers he murdered.
I think he is pretty sensitive to noise. Hates loud music or loud trucks, even if you have the tv a little loud he finds it distracting and disorienting
Extreme temper, as we know. If he ever gets mad at you he will likely walk it off, but sometimes if you push him enough dom Jason comes out. Fucking you against the wall with the machete at your neck, but after he would feel terrible. 
This leads into the next topic but he is 100% the strong, silent type - They're silent not because they have nothing to say, but because they don't have to fill up the air with words. They don't need to be looked at to dominate. They already dominate, just by looking at themselves, but they're serene about it. 
Can he talk?  
For some reason, I have always thought that maybe he could talk, but only short small words extremely few and far between. I don’t really think he can express himself fully even if he wanted to. He wouldn’t raise his voice above a low talk. If you were in danger he would never call your name or yell.
He might whisper “I love you” or give you small pet names but he would use them sparingly  
How you guys met/how you were caught:
So I have had this idea for a while, and I think it would make sense, but you have to be a brave person to be with him. So my idea is that your family owned a cabin on Crystal Lake but in the 80s when the killings began your family would never go back until you inherited it. The cabin sat for a long time, unused, rotting away. 
You drove up there to look at it, and you took it upon yourself to pretty much redo the whole thing and fix up the woodland that surrounded it. As you did this it was early spring into summer. You knew you were being watched and followed. However, you were never scared of this presence, it was almost like a protective energy. You almost welcomed it. Sometimes you could see him just watching and observing, sometimes you tried to follow him. 
Having had the cabin being abandoned it was pretty secluded and overgrown but, there were other cabins across the lake. Yours was the closest to the camp, it was still about 5 miles, but you could hear the screams in the night from teens at the camp. Being a very resourceful person you had set your own security traps and tripwires. You had even put up trail cams where you saw him walking so you could match up the times to murders. Sure enough, It was defiantly him. The killer. The murderer of Camp Crystal Lake. Why were you never afraid of him? Why had you never felt in danger in his presence? 
One day you were so tired from doing repairs, you drifted asleep while watching the clouds pass by. When you woke up he was standing there above you with his head tilted, almost making sure you were ok. Your eyes hit his and he stumbled backwards, he caught one of your tripwires. It landed him on his ass for the first time in years, caught off guard and not knowing what to do next. 
You two just stared at each other. “Hey, it’s ok. I know who you are,” You spoke to him. He had almost forgotten what soft voices sounded like. All he heard were the screams of his victims. “Jason? You are him” He was shocked. Stunned. “It’s ok” You explained seeing his confusion. 
Long before you moved out here you knew about him, heard the stories, read the news articles, spoke to the people of the small surrounding community. “Jason” you spoke again to him, not breaking eye contact. He didn’t know if he should run or just kill you to stop the conflicting feelings. The name you spoke he had not heard in years. It brought back a lot of odd feelings, pain, enjoyment, memories. 
As he sat there, you were not going to pry at him. You stood up from the ground dusting yourself off, looking away for a minute before placing your eyes to where he should have been but, he was gone. 
For months after that he would stare at you from the bushes, just observing. Sometimes he would stand close enough to touch you, but he didn’t. You never wanted to push him, so you just talk to him from the distance even if he never said a word back. It took a full year before he allowed you to touch him. Almost like a stray beaten dog, time, trust, and space were all needed, and maybe some encouragement by making your naked body visible to him through the windows.   
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seijuroww · 4 years
Text
TW // ABUSE mention & allusions to mental illness (plus Illumi angst)
also I hope it all makes sense it’s like 1 am and I’m sleepy but I had to write this down as it came to my head
Okay so again I HATE the zoldyck parents with a PASSION
But I have a deeper take on Kikyo than Silva. I think she was forced into it all, and becoming a Zoldyck has driven her to madness.
Like she comes from Metor City and we all know people there tend to be messed up (*stares at phantom troupe*) she was probably so lonely there and attacked constantly so had to develop the skill to kill in order to survive and I bet Silva capitalized off that thinking “ah here is a woman with skill that I can control and force to reproduce so the Zoldyck business can grow” and she instantly hopped on with him so she can have a way out. Like she was literally offered the chance to leave garage for a mansion in the woods with all the riches of course she took it also too I bet she “loved” Silva (love in quotations as it was probably the first guy to ever show her kindness even if it manipulation so she convinced herself she loved him). Oh and she was probably so excited to be a mother and have all these kids!!! Yet now part of the deal was to train them and build a perfect business Silva and Zeno probably threatened her and manipulated her into thinking she was a bad mother if she failed making them the best assassins. So now that excitement turned to haterd. She hates her kids. Not because she didn’t want them, but because she had to have them like this. She only got to have them in order for them to become “employees” and she never get to actually be a mother. (More about how this affects Illumi in the end too). Oh it pains her heart, and instead of facing those feelings so places it into her abuse.
Also something to consider is that killua is the heir and the best one of the children and is noted to look more like Silva while Illumi -and others but I’m focusing on Illumi bc his parents hate him- is said to look like her and is constantly used as a pawn. Illumi is arguably the most similar to Kikyo (obsession with killua, the hair, the built, under control of Silva, etc) and is tossed around like garage by his parents. NOW this is likely a mirror of Silva to Kikyo. She just follows his orders and does as he says despite the pain and thinks it’s what she must do bc she is a “good wife” and is supposed to make him happy but he literally doesn’t give a shit about her this is ALL part of the larger plan of keeping the Zoldyck business alive. Like if she never gave birth to Killua, Silva would most likely (either by his choice or by Zeno’s orders) have killed Kikyo or kept making her give birth until a killua was born. She never was loved, despite thinking it (just like Illumi omfg). Not even her own kids truly love her. And (again just like Illumi) all she wants is Killua’s love. Killua being born is what saved her life, gave her purpose, gave her respect, let her earn the Zoldyck name. She needs him to be the best assassin or else she has failed. She signed her life away to the Zoldycks. And she definitely struggles with multiplie mental illness like ones affecting her view of herself and of her world and she experiences manic episodes and has ptsd. Silva is master at manipulation and like he fucking earned the right to be the head of Zoldycks, you know he’s only ever thinking business. In his eyes, he owns Kikyo. She has no reason to go against him, he gave her life. He took her from the dump to the wife of the most rich, famous assassin family. But she has a price to pay. That price being keeping the family alive aka giving birth to killua. That’s why she loves when he is so cruel, when he shows his “true assassin nature.” Killua is her favorite because without him she wouldn’t be worthy to be a Zoldyck. She cares about keeping him alive and as an assassin because it’s what will keep her alive and keep her standing in this family. She had completed her assignment. And yes she gave birth after killua but it didn’t have the same weight as those born before killua. Why do you think Kalluto is always around her while she literally couldn’t give two fucks about Miliuki or Illumi (Alluka is not included in all this for obvious reasons)? She is allowed to be more motherly to Kalluto than to the others because she isn’t needed for much anymore (this isn’t to say Kalluto doesn’t still experience the physical abuse of training, but I imagine it’s on a lesser scale than Illumi and Killua’s was).
Okay now time to get into sad Illumi part of all this bc I think too how Kikyo is viewed by Silva affects how both him and Kikyo treat Illumi. And I really believe she takes her pain and suffering out on Illumi. Like he’s the first born she probably abused the hell out of him just out of anger and pure realization that this is her life. She hates it here. And she hates seeing Illumi who is literally just a mirror of her. She sees him and sees where she failed and wished she could just redo him. She’s torn between wanting to kill him or wanting to hold him and tell him his mom is going to protect him. She has been so manipulated by Silva that like she’s turned into this emotional reck like she doesn’t know what she wants anymore and it pains her. As someone from Metor City, she is always focused on her own survival (because like that’s what you have to do there) so it doesn’t what it takes, she will stay a Zoldyck. Even if that means pushing Illumi to a breaking point, allowing Killua to rip her to shreds, let Silva walk all over her, etc. Outside of that mountain, she has nothing else. And honestly inside that mountain she has nothing but a title she wants to protect.
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paradife-loft · 4 years
Text
Close reading all the Jin Guangyao scenes: episode 24
Episode 10 | Episode 11 | Episode 22 | Episode 23
The title of this is a lie, actually, since the first half? two thirds? of this is going to be finishing up with episode 23, but ah well.
So, I left off with the previous episode right after the deeply unfortunate clusterfuck of a conversation between Jin Guangyao, Lan Xichen, Nie Mingjue, and Jin Guangshan, followed by “sometimes war crimes can double as grooming your extremely emotionally vulnerable son, and that’s terrible”. Which means now, it’s time for…
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Swearing an (extremely ill-advised) oath of holy fratrimony!
This is a bit of speculation, since we see almost no detail on what went into the decision to become sworn brothers, but my read is that it at least partially reflects a political motive – tying prominent members of three clans together, rebuilding the rather demolished state of firm alliances and power left in the wake of a major war – while also reflecting a personal desire I think on Lan Xichen’s part to repair the rift between his two good friends, and offer them each a promise that they won’t be left isolated in the middle of larger forces trying to break them down.
The political aspect becomes a bit more apparent when considering the wording of the oath itself, actually: “We are liable to the immortal sects. We are to bring peace and stability to the commoners… If there is a change of heart, one will be faced with a thousand accusing fingers, and the wrath of Heaven and men!” – While this reflects a shared set of values, certainly, it also strikes me as relevant that these three, two of them current sect leaders, are swearing essentially not to become like the Wen clan that they’ve just deposed: they’ll be accountable to others, they’ll work for the benefit of those living under their authority, rather than capriciously throwing their weight around for personal gain.
Oh, and also - I’ve mentioned before, the dramatic irony here in how the consequences they invoke for failing to uphold the principles of their sworn brotherhood are in fact exactly what happens to Jin Guangyao in the end – given what’s to come, the oath he’s swearing ends up being more like a curse. Don’t swear oaths, kids, it never works out well. Of course, at the time, I don’t think he has any intention at all of betraying those principles – the “bring peace and stability to the commoners” part is certainly something he makes an effort to follow up on, once he has the power to do so! Still, for something that starts out with an explicit declaration to not be the sort of evil that Nie Mingjue so straightforwardly abhors, it’s… a very sad outcome.
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Moving forward, we have… the most awkward set of greetings in the entire world, I swear. Mingjue shows up to the post-victory banquet and gets offered the world’s most politically-fraught location on the seating chart; Lan Xichen then reminds Jin Guangyao in front of the assembled members of three(!) separate sects to call him da-ge instead of Chifeng-zun. Jin Guangyao redoes his greeting/offer with the most intense deer-in-headlights look (pictured above), pretty clearly aware that Mingjue is not about to be happy with him. (This little exchange, including the encouraging nod also from LXC to NMJ, is further evidence beyond simply their general personalities I think, that Xichen was the driving force behind the brotherhood oath, especially in a personal sense.) But also, it serves as another piece of foreshadowing future events: knowing Mingjue is unlikely to be happy with the offer of Wen Ruohan’s old throne, Jin Guangshan hands the actual task of offering it off to Jin Guangyao. Here at least, Mingjue doesn’t get distracted from who’s really behind the offer, and addresses Jin Guangshan in vehemently refusing the seat; but it nonetheless continues establishing the pattern where JGS uses Jin Guangyao to be the primary face of his own less-than-savory political maneuvering.
(Which in general, makes me think it’s kind of interesting that he does have Jin Guangyao there greeting guests with him in the first place, and not Jin Zixuan? It’s a bit difficult for me to read what the status of co-greeter is supposed to be – second-in-command, or glorified servant? I think there may be a little bit of both, if JGY is there on one hand because he was the one setting the banquet up, but on the other hand also, because JGS wants to parade him around as his very own hero of the Sunshot Campaign, as Sect Leader Yao is so kind to remind us.
And then there’s... the one-on-one chat with Wei Wuxian.
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First off, I’d like to link people to this post by @hunxi-guilai​, which honestly just goes over… a lot of what I probably would have liked to say about the implied meanings in this conversation. Essentially: Wei Wuxian is interested in what’s going on with this other Sunshot hero who also seems to be not carrying any sword (in a scene where we even see Jiang Yanli carrying hers!), and who had previously used a somewhat unorthodox weapon for his Wen Ruohan stabbing. Jin Guangyao though, is… not really interested in drawing attention to either of those facts (and I’m sure not in a way that would see him in solidarity with WWX), considering “unorthodox and outside the standard set of accepted behaviours in cultivator society” is the opposite of what he’s trying to look like right now.
Relevant to this, honestly, is the question of “what the fuck exactly even is a soft sword,” which CQL does approximately nothing to explain on the face of it, and only very implicitly does so if you’re obsessive like me and try to take blurry screenshots to compare the sword we see stabbing WRH with the sword that Jin Guangyao uses when fighting WWX’s paperman in episode 41.
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Which do appear to be the same sword, inability to get a good clear look at it in either context notwithstanding. Oh, and JGY seems to have either repainted or swapped out the hilt, at some point in the intervening years – perhaps to better match the Jin clan’s aesthetic of white & gold sword decoration that we see on Jin Zixuan’s Suihua?
Anyway, for context on the “what’s a soft sword” issue, I am going to quote a relevant portion from the (EXR translation of the) MDZS novel, even though in general I’m trying to keep the canon cross-pollination in these meta to a minimum.
Back then, when Jin GuangYao worked undercover at Wen RuoHan’s side, he had often hidden the sword at his waist, wreathed the sword around his arm to use during critical moments. Although the blade of Hensheng seemed to be soft to the extremity, attacking with lingering motions, it was in reality both sharp and haunting. Once the blade had wrapped around the opposition, Jin GuangYao would apply it with a bizarre spiritual power, and one would quickly be severed into pieces by the sword, despite its tender appearance. Quite a few famous swords had been battered into piles of scrap iron just like this. At the moment, the blade of the sword attacked as though it was a serpent with silver scales, biting at the paperman without any hesitation.
So yeah – it’s an uncommon weapon, a sword with a blade that can bend and thus works very well for things like being sneaky and unassuming, and not fighting “fairly” in a way the vast majority of other cultivators would have any experience countering.
And... oh my god. Now we’re finally onto episode 24 properly.
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The first input we get from Jin Guangyao this episode is this charming smirk as Wei Wuxian walks up into the center of the hall to interrupt JGS’s unpleasant “hey let’s renew this betrothal~” play. Personal amusement about a rather dramatic individual showing up to do something undoubtedly also dramatic? Entertainment about how a person not known for his skill at subtle political maneuvering is probably about to come in and make a mess that the Jin clan will be able to spin to their own advantage? Ehhh, why not both?
Though of course, the Jiang clan members function very well as a unit here once Wei Wuxian comes in to shake things up, and it’s not nearly the uncomplicated win for the Jin clan that he was probably expecting. Meanwhile, once that’s over, he takes the next opportunity to introduce his father’s next order of business, the invitation to the Phoenix Mountain hunt - and in fact, he does so with an absolutely seamless transition from Jiang Yanli’s rejection of the proposed marriage plan renewal:
“Everyone. For the previous Clan Leader Jiang to have such a daughter is already a great comfort to his soul. And not just Jiang Clan, but after the mess with the Wen Clan, every clan has experienced losses. This is a crucial time for us to rebuild and we critically are in need of manpower. For the past days, Father has spent a lot of time pondering over this matter. Luckily, he’s found a countermeasure. I dare to represent my father in inviting everyone back to Jinlintai during the fall. Jin clan will be putting all efforts towards reorganizing the round-up and hunting event at Hundred Phoenixes Mountain.”
It’s easy to overlook, I think, but the amount of rhetorical skill to put that together on the fly? It’s really not for nothing that Meng Yao was first introduced as being impressively sharp and well-spoken. He’s taking what starts as a loss of face for the Jin clan, redirecting it to focus on the virtue of Jiang Yanli, and then tying that in to the losses and worries that every sect now has in the wake of the war ending. And having reminded them of their own interests and present worries here, he steps in to offer a solution that slots the Jin clan in back at the top, looking extremely good, due to the wealth and comparative manpower advantage they have over everyone else after entering the war relatively late.
(Also, to clarify since it’s only ever implied rather than stated outright in the show, via the dialogue here and then another piece during the hunt itself – the Hundred Phoenix Mountain hunt, from what I can tell, is a regular event held for the purpose of showing off each clan’s skills so that they can attract new prospective disciples, hence why it’s a solution to the sects’ manpower being depleted by the war. Additionally, given the use in particular of reorganizing the event, I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that ordinarily, this event would be one put on by the Chief Cultivator. So with the Wen sect demolished, there was nobody readily available to step up and take over handling this event until now. Jin Guangshan may be fooling none of the viewers about his intentions in adopting a seat right next to Wen Ruohan’s old chair, but he’s certainly making good use of a-Yao’s rhetorical talent to get yet another instance of stepping into the role vacated by the Wen sect looked upon as praiseworthy benevolence.)
…And then what thanks does he get for it? Some dispassionate praise, more work, and no appreciation for the tea he’s made.
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It’s a bit telling (and painful) the way he responds to being asked if he’s found the location of the Yin metal yet, also: “Not yet; I’m incompetent.” I think he’s definitely the sort to feel, even as he’s very aware of the worth of his skills and what sort of areas he’s good with in some respects, the foundation of his belief in himself is nonetheless incredibly rocky and it’s easy for a reminder of any sort of failure to loom suddenly very large over his self-assessment in the moment.
At the same time though, Jin Guangyao is very much an adaptable person, and we see that on full display with his next explanation: that the one who has the last piece of Yin metal may very likely be Wei Wuxian. It’s both an exercise in political savvy, pointing out a powerful and disruptive influence likely to cause problems for Jin Guangshan in the future if his interference in the marriage proposal is any indication, and a significant sewing together of information from several different sources: Wei Wuxian’s opportunity to be in the same place previously as Xue Yang, as he explains to JGS, but also the front-row seat for WWX interfering with the power of Wen Ruohan’s Yin metal using Chenqing and his new Yin Tiger Seal.
I don’t think he holds any particular animosity toward Wei Wuxian at this point? This reads to me like a calculation based pretty essentially on: his father is clearly invested in expanding the power of the Jin sect and diminishing the interest or ability of other sects to oppose him, and also in (instrumentally to that goal) getting his hands on the last piece of Yin metal. Jin Guangyao has been explicitly tasked with working on the latter concern, and probably implicitly at least with the former - at some point, and some point soon, he’s going to need to produce results on that front, or else be dropped from JGS’s incredibly conditional regard for not being useful enough. Given the confluence of circumstances, lining up suspicions (which for all he knows are likely even true!) against Wei Wuxian serves both goals, and gives him another safe place to rest for a day or two before having to continue worrying how to be helpful enough to keep deserving his newfound status.
And that’s it for Jin Guangyao in episode 24! Poor kiddo. Looks like you can climb another rung higher on the ladder, sure, but it doesn’t mean you’ll make it free of being used for quite a long while still.
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misshvariety1307 · 4 years
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Bad Luck? Or A Strange Twist of Fate?
Sitting in her dressing room, getting ready for her first number of the evening, Light felt a subtle wave of spark-ache pass through her spark. It had been a few months since the ill-timed encounter with Powerdrain, the big time casino owner/Deception mobster. And since then she had been missing her family and friends terribly. She knew that by now they would be absolutely sick with worry at where she might be. Sadly she could never tell them where she was and what she was doing in fear of them being slaughtered by her new boss and "keeper" for breaking her agreed silence.
Brushing on some gold glitter around her optics her thoughts drifted back to when she was brought to the casino once the agreement was made. She remembered feeling so..so out of place and so afraid of what she was going to be doing for what she thought was the rest of her life. Even all the costumes, clothes, jewelry, and other things Powerdrain provided for her felt so uncomfortable to use. But thankfully one of the more experienced dancers saw her distress and, after some strong convincing, took her under her wing to teach her and ease her into this way of life. She was sad though when she decided to leave for another club closer to home that was hiring. It just felt like she was alone all over again.
Then there was the day a month ago that she foolishly let Powerdrain discover her natural singing talent while despite trying to be careful enough to hide it. Apparently the safe spot she was using to hide in for solace wasn't as soundproof as she thought it was. Now that he knew about it he could clearly use it as a means to bind her even more to this place and this nightmare she was in. And boy did he. He was so smitten by what he heard he quickly made her up to be the new star of his casino. The first she sang in front of an actual crowd she received a standing ovation from the quickly amassed crowd that watched. Overnight she became a hit in the burlesque scene and was certainly an added value to Powerdrain's growing business and fortune.
With her quickly growing success Powerdrain only saw it fitting that she "expand her horizons", in a manner of speaking. Making a deal with the club his boss frequented he would lend her out to them in case they needed a last minute dancer to fill a suddenly vacant spot. Which to her meant that she trapped even more and it seemed like there was no way to get out. But....to be fair....it really wasn't that bad. The first few times that she went to the club she soon struck up a casual friendship with Knockout, the favorite of many a patron to the establishment. Soon the more they talked and got to know one another the more Light saw the fabulous red mech as a confidant and someone she could turn to when things seemed just a bit too dark to handle. Plus, the little tips and tricks he taught her certainly came in handy during her own performances back at the casino.
Once she had finished brushing on the last fleck of makeup Light let out a gentle sigh and stood up from her vanity. Walking over to the rack of costumes her processor glossed over those performances. Gliding a servo over each piece the memories of each one flooded through her, feeling the familiar rush and strange exhilaration that she got every time she performed. The moves, the song, the spotlight, the crowd…. It…it lit a fire within her she had never felt before and..and it felt so amazing sometimes. Looking up a bit she got a wistful look on her face, remembering one performance that felt so wonderful it was like she was in another world as she was performing. Closing her optics she started to relive the feeling until realization hit her and her optics snapped open.
W-wait…. Did…did she actually…like performing like this? Starting to softly hyperventilate she looked around, not wanting to believe this and started to remind herself why she was here. She was being blackmailed to perform so that her family and friends stay safe. The mech imprisoning her in this was a mobster and an evil mech that was just using her to keep his secret identity intact and exploit her for her talent. Nothing more.
Reaching up and holding her helm she shook it back and forth, feeling overwhelmed by her thoughts and starting to cry. It was as if her processor and her spark were trying to battle to be the better of the other. Unsure how to compromise she felt herself getting weak in the knee joints and stumbled over to her vanity chair, sinking into it before she collapsed to the floor. Leaning against her vanity she looked at herself in the mirror, wondering who she really was at this point and whether or not she was still the femme she was before this whole mess started. Crossing her arms she put her head down and continued to cry, wanting everything just to end at that point so she wouldn't have to feel anything and finally get some sense of peace.
Just then a sudden knock came to her door and from behind it an all too familiar voice spoke in its recognizable sultry yet chilling tone. "Oh my little trinket, are you ready to shine on stage?"
Softly gasping and leaning up Light looked at the door in a frightened panic, not expecting Powerdrain to arrive so soon. Looking back at her vanity and seeing that her makeup was somewhat messed up she quickly cleaned herself up to the point where she was almost done just a few minutes prior. Grabbing what she needed she reapplied what was missing while she spoke up. "J-just about, sir!"
Softly chuckling Powerdrain opened the door and stepped in, closing the door behind him before walking over and approached from behind. "Good, little one. Good." Seeing what she was doing he gave her a curious look while stopping and leaning down towards her. "Usually you would have been done with your makeup by now, my dear. What's taking you so long tonight?"
"Oh, I...I didn't like how part of it came out so I had to redo it. It was a late minute decision, I'm sorry." Looking up at him through the mirror Light tried very hard to keep calm and act normally. She didn't want to give away any hint that she was having a practical meltdown right before he showed up.
"I see. Well, I think that it was a very good decision to make, my pet." Smirking at her response Powerdrain nodded while reaching over and placing his hands on her upper arms. Softly and sensuously pulling them up he rested them on her shoulders then rubbed his thumbs around in a light and tender massage. "After all, I prefer that you look as perfect as possible when you're out performing. It heightens your appeal and makes you all the more...desirous to the patrons." Then reaching up with his left hand he gripped her chin between his index digit and thumb and tilted her head to look at him as he leaned in a bit more with a persuasive look in his optics. "You wouldn't want to disappoint them with imperfect looks, would you? Or worse yet…disappoint me?"
Her breath hitching for a brief moment when she felt his touch Light softly gasped and shivered. Venting heavier as she felt his hand slip up her arms a soft moan escaped her audials as her mind started to swirl. Shaking her helm she softly blushed when he took her chin like that and looked up at him with a slow forming guilty look in her optics. "N-no sir. Not..not at all. I….I know that's the last thing I can't…I can't let happen. Especially to you…"
"That's right. You've learned well over the time you've been here." Smirking at her answer Powerdrain chuckled and leaned in closer still, their faceplates starting to be mere inches from each other. "Who knew by that unfortunate encounter that I would have found my best money maker since starting this casino. And all it took was a little…coercion on your part to make it happen. Plus, who knew that you are such a natural with that graceful and limber body of yours?"
Her blush getting deeper the closer his faceplate came to here Light felt a cold chill go through her when he said that. It was as if he knew that she almost had that meltdown and was just twisting the knife further into her. Then when he mentioned that she bashfully flushed and softly shrugged to say that she agreed. "Y-yeah, who...who knew?"
Noticing her flush Powerdrain smirked and stole a quick glance down her body, looking back up into her optics with a playful and persuasive look. Letting her go he leaned away and walked over to her rack of costumes as he continued to coax her. "Oh don't be so bashful, my trinket! You need to be proud that you have a delicious body to use at your disposal. Consider it a means to reach a goal. After all, isn't it every little femme's dream to be a star? Well, this is certainly your chance to take it. Just let go of that modest thinking that you've been brainwashed with and finally take a chance to live like you are truly meant to!" Looking through her costumes he stole a quick glance at her. "And once you do, you'll see that you'll have the potential to be a queen of the burlesque scene. Plus get all the perks and pleasure of being one too."
As he turned back and looked through the assortment Light looked down at the floor for a few moments and considered his words. Was…was he actually right about what he said? Was she so wrapped up in keeping her modesty intact that she was missing what was right in front of her? Was…was this the way for her to finally do what she always wanted to do, even though it was considered by her family to be a most unsavory profession? Looking at herself in the mirror she started to think back to when she was with her family last and the discussion that they had about her preferred career choice. She remembered how sparkbroken she was when they thought that she wouldn’t make it and would be much happier staying where she was and married off to a prominent member of society so that she could live the rest of her life as a proper sparkmate. Looking away from her reflection she then begin to wonder if running into Powerdrain that night was really just an ill-timed accident…or fate showing her the way to what she truly wanted. Powerdrain’s words still ringing in her processor she still didn’t want to believe them but at the same time they…they made so much sense. Like before with her helm and her heart her sense of morale and her guilty wants and pleasures were wanting to war within her for control. She just didn’t know if she wanted to commit and really see this as her true way of life.
Making a decision and picking out a black costume with jeweled chains that would match Light’s makeup shades Powerdrain turned back and saw her deep in thought. Raising a curious optical ridge at her he walked over and reached down, lifting her head up by her chin again. As he did he gave her confident look that may or may not have bordered on his hypnotic one. “I know that you want to try and hold on to whatever you had left of your previous way of life but it’s time to forget it, my pet. You belong here now, deal or no deal, and there’s no way of going back. Best to just make the decision now and not let that pesky moral compass lead your life for you anymore. It’s time that you led yourself for a change and do what you want to do." Handing over her costume he pleasantly smirked as he caressed the corner of her dermas with his thumb then let go and stepped away towards the door. "Well, better hurry up and get dressed, my dear. We have a good crowd tonight so we can't keep them waiting. I'll see you out there." Giving her a wink he stepped out and closed the door behind him, heading off take care of other business.
Madly blushing from his caress she took her costume then watched as he headed to the door, nodding in understanding to what he said. The show had to go on, after all. Once the door was closed she looked down at the costume and softly sighed, running her digits over the silky fabric. If he was right and she needed to let go of her compass to be free to enjoy her chance at stardom....would she be the fool to let it slip by if she let it continue to control her life? Getting up she went behind the changing screen and slipping out of her robe she put on her costume, letting the fabric hug her supple curves and assets. Shivering a bit as the chains touched and settled against her protoform she pulled the zipper up then stepped out. Walking back over she sat down once more and pulled on her fishnet stockings and clipped them onto the attached garter belts on her costume. Making sure that they were secure she reached over for the pair of heels nearby and slipped them on, zipping up the backs of them while making sure the cuffs were sitting just right. The last thing was the somewhat long tulle and feathered train that she attached at her hips that swayed with every hip swing.As she was getting the last of her jewelry on she looked up into the mirror again and sighed, feeling herself coming to a decision at last. As she was changing she was continuously thinking about the last words Powerdrain told her before he left. If…if he was right and she should just…let go and embrace this new life….would she be able to come to terms with the consequences of her family finding out and disowning her? Remembering that conversation one last time she hesitated for a few moments as a realization slowly made itself known to her. No…no matter what she tried they wanted her to be what they wanted. They would never understand how her desire to be a singer was what she wanted to be and never accept her as anything else but as an obedient daughter who stayed in line and followed their morals. Looking away from her reflection she had to see that…that Powerdrain was right. This was her only chance to live her dream and be the singer she dreamed of being. Even if it meant that she had to become the one thing her parents never dreamed of her being then so be it.
Standing up from her vanity that familiar fire that she craved lit up within her and began to surge like never before. Ready to get things started she gathered up her train, slung it over her arm, and headed to the door. Stepping out she closed the door behind her she headed to the stage, confidently strutting as she did to get ready to perform her number. Time for the star of the casino to sing once more.
Watching her from the nearby shadows Powerdrain smirked and quietly chuckled as a victorious smirk crossed his gaze. Seeing how confident she was when she came out he knew that his little prodding and convincing had worked like a charm. Plus adding just a tinge of his hypnotic power to seal the deal worked to perfection. Knowing that she would be a liability the longer she feared being there and yearned for the possibility of freedom he had to do something to persuade her to stay and truly become his shining diamond. And to keep his mob identity perfectly intact.
Pleased that his plan had worked he stepped out and continued to watch as his prize disappeared around the corner. Deciding that he needed a well deserved break he headed out to the bar, got himself a much needed drink, then went over his reserved booth. Sitting down and relaxing he waited for his star to shine once more and enjoy the show.
}{}{}{}{
A little drabble that popped into my head while working on the colored versions of Cops and Mobs AU Light and Powerdrain XD. Hmm, is there more to Powerdrain’s plan? What more could he have in store for Light in the future? I just might have to write a sequel to find out!
This au is so much fun to be a part of! I hope you all like it! 
Cops and Mobs AU belongs to @pastelpaperplanes
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hellyeahomeland · 4 years
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[Assuming I can count right, this is the tenth and last debrief. Thank you to everyone who participated. These questions are harder than they seem! See you all on the other side. --Sara]
Name: Sara (@carriemathison)
Answered on: various days over the last two weeks 
1. What is your idea of a perfect Homeland ending? 
It needs to feel right. I need to look back and think, “yeah, that was right.” What is “right” though?… I mean, I have no idea. I’ll know it when I see it and I’ll know when I don’t see it. How’s this for not answering a question? 
2. Which Homeland character do you most identify with? 
This is a tricky question because I don’t really relate to any character on this show. Their lives and circumstances are all so extreme. That said, I’ve spent the better part of a decade thinking about and trying to understand Carrie Mathison in all her maddening complexity, so at this point I do identify with her. 
3. What has your experience as a fan of the show been like? 
A rollercoaster, start to finish. This fandom has gone through so many iterations. It’s evolved in much the same way that the show has. I could never in 400 gagillion years imagined that after seven years we’d have amassed over 22,000 posts, five seasons’ worth of podcasts, and so many friends from all over the world. It’s been a ride. We really did have a time. 
4. What is a moment on Homeland that made you sit up out of your seat in awe or shock? 
There have been quite a few over the years. These stand out most vividly in my memory. 
Carrie going New Car Smell on Brody’s ass in “New Car Smell.” I have vivid, vivid memories of watching that in my apartment in college. This was before the days of the blog and the only place I had to discuss this show was TWoP. 
Brody dying. I remember watching that episode at my desk, in that same college apartment, and having an actual physical reaction to him being hanged. I think I started to shake. That hasn’t happened before or since. 
Strangely, the end of “Long Time Coming” really caught me by surprise. I felt that ending was actually kind of cliffhanger-y, because when the screen cut to black amid that familiar jazz music I think I stood up and screamed. It might also have been a delayed reaction to The Kiss, which was legitimately shocking at the time.
5. If you could have the writers redo one storytelling decision, what would it be and why? 
The popular answer seems to be that they should have killed Quinn in season five, which is correct. But let’s just assume they’ve already done that since we all agree they should have. 
I’m going to go with a left-field answer and say that I want a redo of the storyline with Carrie’s mother. In two straight season finales (“The Choice” and “The Star”) there are allusions to Carrie’s mother and to Carrie feeling abandoned. They set up all the right pieces in season four, a season that is largely centered around Carrie coming to terms with being a mother herself, with being a mother to this child she kept for a number of reasons that felt more and more tragic (and ill-advised) each day. 
Instead of focusing on the resolution of Carrie’s own anger and resentment toward Ellen Mathison in light of Carrie finally understanding what it means to abandon a child, they decided to make it about Carrie’s secret half-brother, her mother’s series of affairs, and the revelation that Ellen didn’t leave Frank because he was bipolar. The last, by the way, is important, but it’s framed in such a way as to provide context to her initial rejection of Quinn post-The Kiss (“I’ll just fuck it up”), and it all adds up to a jumbled, overwrought mess. We all deserved better. That scene is I think the only time while watching this show that I thought, wow Claire seems to be really struggling with this. 
6. If you could be a Homeland character, which one would you like to be?
I would like to be Carrie for... let’s say a month. It would be supremely painful and dramatic, but imagine being that fucking awesome? That smart and powerful and fearless? 
7. What is your favorite episode of Homeland? 
“Marine One” and that’s been my answer for over seven years. I think it’s my favorite episode of television ever. Beyond it spawning twin years-long sartorial obsessions, I think it is really a masterpiece. I love the structure of the episode. It starts off very quietly. Brody’s tape is haunting and then the scene where Saul visits Carrie is disgustingly heartbreaking (“But Saul…” … I will never get over that). Then it ramps up into this anxiety-filled clusterfuck. Carrie realizing what’s happening but no one will listen (yes, I know all the words in that phone call scene, what about it?) except Dana. That’s irony. The Carrie and Brody cat/mouse game continuing outside the police station, Brody just digging and digging even after Carrie cries uncle. Carrie remembering who Issa is right before they erase her memory. These are all sentence fragments because I’m bad at articulating my feelings about this episode. Except that I can basically only ever watch it on an airplane because I have nowhere else to go. I build up some episodes of this show in my head, remembering them as better than they actually are. This is one of the few that is just as good. Legendary, iconic, will never be topped.
8. What is your least favorite episode of Homeland?
There are some episodes of this show that are boring and nothing to write home about (or blog about, for that matter). Other episodes have gotten a reputation over the years as being some of the show’s worst (“Broken Hearts,” “Tower of David,” “America First” -- all of which are better than you remember). I can deal with all of those episodes well enough. In fact I’ve been quite shocked at all the “Tower of David” slander in these responses over the last few months, but now is not the time for me to defend “Tower of David.” 
In keeping with this blog’s motto for the last seven years, I’m gonna go rogue on this one and say that I absolutely hate the double whammy of “Why Is This Night Different?” and “Better Call Saul.” Those episodes suck. In all our years of podcasting, the only episode that I have outright refused to do a podcast episode for is “Better Call Saul.” (At the time I made up an excuse, but guess what I LIED because I hate that episode.) Quinn leaning pathetically on Carrie’s shoulder after he gets shot and later tying himself to a cinder block to drown himself in a river will never not be legitimately, horrifyingly terrible. The only saving grace of these episodes is HAIR IN A BUN but they had to fuck it up with that awful wig. Bad.
9. If you could bring back one character, dead or alive, from the Homeland graveyard, who would it be and why? 
David Estes. Gone too soon and we deserved to see a Carrie/David romance redux. 
10. What will be your most enduring memory of Homeland? 
I’ve met so many amazing people as a result of this show and this blog. Real and true forever friends. There are so many fantastic memories, and not-fantastic ones that will nevertheless endure. 
Of them all, I will never forget going to Chicago the weekend of the season six finale with Ashley; seeing Hamilton on Saturday night; realizing that there was not an HDMI-equipped television in the Airbnb; buying a television at Best Buy on Sunday morning; going to a Chicago White Sox game where we proceeded to get pretty tipsy on alcoholic root beer; buying lots and lots of alcohol at a liquor store, including some trademark Carrie pinot grigio, because we were having a great ol’ time; maintaining the buzz throughout the finale; whispering “oh my God they killed him” when they killed Quinn, after which Ashley reflexively replied “no, he’s not dead”; recording a drunk podcast in the immediate aftermath that is sadly lost to the sands of time; realizing that everyone was freaking out about the episode; calling it a night at 10:30pm; groggily waking up a few hours later to Ashley telling me she was leaving the Airbnb; being hungover the next day and listening to Ashley tell me about how she did some light breaking and entering the previous night; driving back to Madison while we tried to make sense of anything Rupert Friend was saying in his post-finale interviews; and keeping the aforementioned television in the back seat of my car for the next six months before I finally sold it to a friend (“only been used one time!”).
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hyycks · 5 years
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100 reasons to love lee donghyuck
[repost cause i remade oops; ill be posting part two for his birthday!]
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“hAEllo my name is Haechan :D”
his raw talent and passion for performing.
he’s always ready to jump on stage and for his very best, and you can see it everytime he smiles at the end of his performance
as a trainee he was one of the best rappers since he had such an amazing sense of rhythm as doyoung mentioned  
music is more than just his job, it’s his passion and he genuinely enjoys learning and experiencing music
his undying love for Michael Jackson
his heart shaped smile that really rivals the sun itself.
his smile is so pure and sincere it can make anyone’s day better
his confidence in his tanned skin, even though some people tease him for it he’s always so loving about his own skin color.
his constant need for physical affection whether it be hugging his members or trying to give Mark cheek kisses
hes not afraid to show his love adoration for members
his laugh and the way he almost falls over from laughing too hard
the fact that he cooks for the members from time to time, showing how much he truly cares for them
mood maker of the group!!! he’s always trying to make everyone happy and keep the team energized with his jokes or random acts!
he’s more considerate than people make him out to be. although people keep teasing Jeno for being “No Jam” he said Jeno is really one of the funniest members as a compliment and Jeno was so smiley throughout the rest of the vlive.
the way he smiles so fondly at the younger members and is always looking out for them
his passion for dancing. even though he’s the vocalist in the group, his dancing skills are truly commendable. he has sharp memory when it comes to dance and he enjoys learning to choreo to sooo many songs!!
the way he calls himself fullsun in English!
HIS ENGLISH! *cue donghyuck saying marshmallow*
his taste in music, he listens to amazing songs across so many different genres, and loves recommending songs to us as well which is so adorable
the way he styles himself! he knows what looks good on him but he’s not afraid to try new things
the fact that he collects LPs! he loves collecting LPs of his favorite albums, and you can see the glimmer of excitement in his eyes when he spotted a few of his fav in LA
his cute tarot readings! also in LA he bought a pack of tarot cards and did some readings for the members and he was so engrossed and into it!
when he’s deeply invested in something, he suddenly goes all quiet and concentrates.
his love for video games! he keeps complaining saying he’s not the best at them but he still tries regardless and enjoys himself!
his voice. his voice is so soothing and gentle, it’s honestly so angelic sm pls let him release a solo track
he can play the piano really well and it’s one of his favorite hobbies !!
he respects shinee a lot, and especially adores Taemins music and he looks up to them!
he grew up so much!! he used to be short and really cute during chewing gum but since then he’s grown really tall!
not just physically, he’s grown so much more mentally. as a person he’s more responsible and careful and he’s so kind and loving
he loves playing with children, and he’s so kind and careful when playing with them!!
even when he’s going through a hard time he tries his best to stay the smiley donghyuck we know of!
his talent doesn’t just stop at performing he does his own eye makeup and shines in his own special way
he wants to be a singer-songwriter and I truly believe he his capable of writing beautiful and amazing music !!
he’s improved so much since the start! he keeps practicing and learning more day by day
he’s so so so caring, when Jisung couldn’t dribble the ball, he kept causing disturbances so that he could redo it!!
the tinie way he kept repeating I love you to sicheng during the 2 year anniversary olive
his giggles!!
dongsookie and the way he laughs while covering his mouth
the way his skin glimmers when he wears the color red
RED! IS! A COLOR! CREATED! FOR! HIM!
he looks so good in red, when he had red hair or whenever he wears red items of clothing his features just stand out so much more!!
he’s been playing football since he was in elementary school and is good at it too!
he’s so good with his words and could easily become a well known variety!dol with his wit and sharp comments
mc!hyuck
sm make hyuck an MC or send him to a variety show please he’s so funnie and quick witted I’m sure he’ll do a great job!
his acting skills! ask him to be dramatic, he’s your guy he can portray multiple emotions in 0.003 seconds what a legend
his lines in paradise :(( (they’re so beautiful I love his voice)
whenever hyuck wears SnapBacks and you can see his cute forehead it just makes me want to give him a thousand tinie kisses
when he gave jeno a kiss on the cheek during the shooting of ‘go’ and just bolted away and how the dreamies remembered it as a memory from shooting the MV
when he harmonizes with Jaehyun and both of their voices sound like angels singing together
on his phone cover he has stickers of all the 127 members from the chain album :(( how … cute
his verses in heartbreaker and angel are the reason why I still breathe they make me feel all giddy inside his voice is so so nice?!
that gif… of donghyuck wrapped up in a blanket and giggling makes my heart jump around like a fool I might as well join the olympics
his high note in ‘go’ is single handedly the best thing ever (renjun singing that part is second)
NCT members said that donghyuck can make delicious food with wtv is in the fridge we love a king of improv cooking
when his hair has his natural waves and he suddenly looks so much more adorable I don’t know how to explain it but .. that photo shoot of his wavy hair … I love it
TRIGGER THE FEVER! All of dreamies did amazing !! BUT TRIGGER THE FEVER I LOVE THE SONG I LOVE HIS SINGING IN THE SONG AND CHOREO IS SO AWESOME I LOVE LOVE LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT
I LOVE HIS HIGH NOTES IN TRIGGER THE FEVER HES SUCH A TALENTED SINGER!!
that aside the dreamies choreos aren’t simple they all put in a lot of work and effort and I’m so proud of all of them, especially my first and last the choreo is so detailed !!
“hErE iS kORea mAN.” “don’T fOrGet okAY?”
him trying to give spoilers for ‘go’ and being pushed off by the other members because he was overdoing it soo much fshsh
whenever they do yaja time, hyuck is either the one having the most fun or suffering the most
when he’s with 127 doing yaja time, he really doesn’t hold back but then karma gets it when jisung picks on him when he’s with the dreamies
when he was directing the boy video for mark and chenle and he kept asking them to change the ‘mood’ of the shoot after every few seconds making everyone laugh
when he held that same eye batting cute smile through most of the live (´。• ω •。`)
the fact that he makes up different handshakes with each member and showed them to us too!
behind video for joy and hyuck kept pretending to be lifted up by the helium balloon in the background
Johnny’s love for hyuck and hyucks love johnny, we don’t talk enough about this, they’re both just adorable and so precious
his “hi girls ;D” in the momo x video
when chenle said “sea” in Chinese and hyuck replying “hi :D” cause they sound similar
his cute frustrated face when chenle said he didn’t know what shadow was in korean and he lost the game
when he clung on to mark and said “hyung, I’m hungryyy.” in the most adorable voice ever
“booming system up uh ty track uh ty track”
when doyoung asked hyuck to sing a song from his ost to prove that he heard it and he just sang “APADO GWENCHANA.”
he’s savage and a teasing mess a lot of the times but he’s secretly really sweet and caring and that makes him just so endearing
he may tease mark relentlessly but mark sees him as a younger sibling which shows just how close these two are :((
when his karaoke got voted the most not fun event during NCT life in Paju but instead of just complaining he got up and made a nice breakfast for all of the members
his cover of smooth criminal on weekly idol [plus his cute lisp]
this five seconds at the end of the 00+00+00+00=LOVE vlive where hyuck plays a cover of a thousand miles
when he couldn’t break his chopsticks and taeyong gave him his instead, the way he smiled out of love is just so warm???
he’s honestly so so so talented I mean he’s even good at archery he went on isac and did his very best I was so proud?
when he did a freestyle to whiplash? like where does his talent stop? he’s so talented and skilled in so many areas?
those tiny video which he posts on twitter looking like the cutest boy ever
the way he looks when he wears glasses is just so cute and adorable?
that clip of him jumping around in the feathers for the touch MV
his eyes that are shaped like tony almonds that hold the glimmer of all the stars in this universe combined
his strong stage charisma that has the ability to leave everyone stunned
his scar next to his eye that just makes him all the more human and all the more lovable
all of the moles on his body that deserve to kissed and loved over and over again
he’s really sweet and kind but he loves prancing his members tbt NCT life in Paju when he pranked the members with salted sprite and soy sauce cola and half the members didn’t trust him because they’re used to his pranks
that time when he and Jeno pranked jisung by changing his iPad wallpaper to a cockroach
the way he giggles is so soft and loving it makes flowers bloom all over the world
That time when Chenle and Hyuck relentlessly pushed away members in NCT Dream School Mate to win the game. “yEA ChEnLE BaBY”
he’s actually so thoughtful, he bought a radio just because Johnny and Jaehyun host a radio show to show how much he loves and supports them
when he was singing “baby don’t like it” live on NCT night night but forgot the lyrics it was so cute? (not to mention how blessed his voice was)
kept dancing to other groups choreos instead of their own when dreamies were doing the let’s dance and mark got so frustrated
NCT 127 on Ah!Nimdle where he kept rushing to the front to answer questions about the members by “giving up on looking handsome” (we’d all do it for food thanks)
his commentary on the soccer vlive he did with Jisung and Jungwoo and Yuta! (sm he’s so talented look)
he cuddles people in his sleep which is why he wanted to room with Jeno because he’s comfortable with him but when Jeno exposed hyuck he got so so so so so shy owo
In general he’s such an amazingly talented and wonderful person. He deserves so much more love and I just wish he’d get the appreciation he deserves because even through all the hardships he manages to stay the fullsun we all know and love.
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