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thel0v3hashira143 · 3 months

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❝ 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐀 𝐂𝐔𝐓𝐈𝐄! ❞

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ yuuji megumi gojo nanami n choso ☆ how jjk men act when they have a crush on you!

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⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ fem!reader, black coded but anyone can read

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ notes: ahhh the comeback post!! let's just say my old works were...less than coherent. but im here and ready to slay the day after 2-ish years!! take these crumbs while i try and find my footing again. stay hot lovies 🎀🎀

yuuji itadori 🌸

my babyyy (sob sob) yuuji would def try to impress you with his athleticism, bc girls like that stuff right? (gojo told him that...save him)

he frequently challenges you to friendly competitions when sparring to showing off his skills.

he def let's you get quite a few hits on him and he may even let you win from time to time (seeing your smile makes getting knocked on his ass worth it)

he might act a bit bashful, but he's straightforward. he knows he has a crush on you so why would he hide it?

expect nice gestures like him wanting to carry things for you, buying you food, watching all your fav movies, ect.

speaking of which, movie hangouts!!!

every friday usually you, megumi, nobara, and yuuji all get together and watch a movie

buuuttt if he's feeling especially brave he'll invite you to his dorm to watch the newest movie in your favorite series! (yes, he keeps track of when they come out)

he loves that it becomes y'alls thing and he loves it even more when you lay your head on his shoulder and doze off <;33

he also gives hella compliments cause something in my gut says his love language is words of affirmation.

anticipate many "isn't [name] just the coolest?" or "you look great today [name]!"

im telling you he could never run out of nice things to say to you, whether it be about your looks or personality

as soon as he realizes he likes you he takes down those pin up girl posters in his dorm

he also obviously thinks you're more beautiful than jennifer lawrence argue wit ur mama

he is also obviously a personality over looks guy so dont act surprised if you see him looking at you with a lovesick grin if he catches you doing something kind for someone

expect him to confess his feelings sooner rather than later

"yeah, why wouldn't i have a crush on [name]? shes beautiful and badass! but don't tell her, okay?"

megumi fushiguro 🌸

megumi, unlike yuuji is quite reserved, even with his friends

honestly gives no indication that he likes you at all 💀💀 he stares at you pretty intensely at first (to admire your beauty) but quickly catches on that you think its weird..

once you two get closer though, megumi would frequently express his crush through small gestures

he strikes me as a reader so i can see him recommending his favorite books to you or even lending you some of his.

you two exchange books often and he highlights quotes that remind him of you

i can also see book shop hangouts where you two sit and read together in some small bookshop he found in the city.

(he's just admiring you read)

he's not a huge compliment/affirmation guy but quality time is a big one for him

whether it be on missions, sparring, or out with the rest of the first year's, he enjoys any time he can have with you.

megumi is also very protective but like...subtly

he secretly watches out for you during missions, making sure you're safe without drawing attention to it

he'll insist you two split up but send one of his divine dogs to accompany you to wherever you go.

even when you're out and about in tokyo he always likes to stay close to you. he follows you around (not in a creepy way more like a lost puppy way)

follows you into stores you like even if he has absolutely no interest.

all in all he's just a shy guy who's whipped for you <3

"i enjoy spending time with you. a lot."

teen!satoru gojo 🌸

gojo...you bastard...(affectionate)

erm ngl i can def see him being a bully to you at first...

not like a bully bully but he def teases you a lot and it gets under your skin sometimes. (you hate him)

but in reality hes jus a spoiled litte rich boy in love.

once he realizes his feelings he still pokes fun at you sometimes, but tones it down hard and turns on his charm.

gojo's approach is confident and playful. he teases you, always with a charming grin, creating a dynamic that keeps things lighthearted and enjoyable.

he'll find excuses to spend time with you, whether it's offering to train together

unlike yuuji he doesn't care if he likes you this son of a gun will NOT let you win istg

it's like he's trying to rile you up, saying ridiculously cheesy one liners as he dodges all your attacks.

"thats the best you got? oh [name], we'll never get to be together if i keep beating you!"

one thing he does enjoy doing with you however, are snack runs.

gojo is a big back in disguise with too much money to spend so you already knows most of that goes towards food.

he has a huge sweet tooth so i can see you guys browsing multiple sweets shops in the city. if he sees you even look at something for too long he'll buy 10 of them.

every trip you guys both leave with full bellies and full hearts <3

gojo wants to be around you, and he makes sure it's fun for you both

his confession is likely to be straightforward. ccompanied by his trademark smile and his sparkling blue eyes peeking from his shades.

"you know, i've been thinking... i'm kind of into you. what do you say we make things a bit more interesting?"

teen!kento nanami 🌸

my emo boy ❤️‍🩹

nanami, with his composed demeanor, expresses his feelings (though you were unsure if he even had any) through thoughtful actions.

he remembers every. single. detail. of anything you say to him.

your favorite attist dropped an album today? he already bought you the cd/vinyl. you never got a chance to go to the store to get your favorite snack? he went 2 days ago.

he revels in the fact that he knows so much about yousnd the surprised look on your face gets him every time.

(haibara claims he's seen nanami smile at you multiple times but he vehemently denies it.)

despite his serious appearance, he'll occasionally crack dry jokes when it's just the two of you

look at that man and tell me he doesn't have a dry sense of humor 😭😭

you help him to relax and he feels he can truly be himself around you. when you two are alone its like hes showing a different side to his personality.

like megumi, i can see quality time being a big thing for him since attending jujutsu high leaves him quite busy

hes also not a huge talker so whenever you two do spend time together its probably somewhere intimate like your dorm or the library.

no words, just vibes. which he appreciates since he's around a bunch of yipper yappers all day.

nanami's confession is understated but sincere.

"i appreciate the time we spend together. it's made me realize there's something more i feel..."

choso kamo 🌸

my babyyyy no. 2 (i need him biblically)

let's get one thing straight tho. choso is a curse. in my opinion curses have no idea of love in a healthy, positive way so let's just say bb is confused.

he obviously knows what love is. he loves his brothers but he doesnt wanna kiss them...and cuddle them...

he goes to yuuji for advice (was it a bad idea? perhaps.)

"bro you totally have a crush on [name]!"

"a crush?"

after some further investigation hes pretty much got the gist of it.

one thing he becomes quite fond of doing is giving you small gifts from his missions.

these aren't typic gifts persay, like food, clothing or jewelry but more like knickknacks such as shells or rocks.

these tokens become a way for him to express what words might fail to convey.

i headcannon choso likes nature documentaries and after seeing that penguins mate for life by gifting a rock to their mate he's hooked.

idk but i also feel like he's very touchy.

he always has an eye on you in public and ik he does the thing where he guides u with his hand on the small of your back or he locks pinkies with you UGHHHH

with him being protective, he also subtly keeps an eye on you during missions.

he's not one to voice his concern directly but prefers to ensure your safety from the danger.

choso's confession might catch you off guard, but it's filled with honesty and sincerity.

"i've found myself caring about you more than I expected. it's strange..."

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⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ omg i actually really like this...(watch me hate it in a week) but reqs are open!! i have 1 or 2 more pieces planned to get me in the swing of things but take this before then. love y'all!!

𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐲 ♡

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𝙧𝙚𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚!

𝙘𝙤𝙥𝙮𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙡0𝙫3𝙝𝙖𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙧𝙖143 2024

#Words of the Love Hashira 💗#jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #yuuji x reader #megumi x reader #gojo x reader #nanami x reader #choso x reader #x black fem reader #black writers on tumblr

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kirain · 5 months

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Please don't get me wrong, I like gale well enough, but he turns me off because I get the impression that he wouldn't care much about what I have to say. He's so intelligent and wise and he clearly has years and years of education and study under his belt. So what on earth could I even talk to him about without boring him to death? Because honestly, I like to talk, like, a lot. I'm just as passionate about stuff but not nearly as knowledgeable and I fucking hate that look on people's face when they're blithely listening to stuff that bored them? Im not knowledgeable enough to have anything to offer him

This is ironically how Gale feels about himself. He feels like he has absolutely nothing to offer anyone, which is why he went after the orb in the first place. He felt inadequate for a goddess, and he feels inadequate for Tav. The idea that Tav is attracted to him genuinely shocks him, too, because from his standpoint ... who could possibly love him? He's just a guy who screws everything up. That's why he's so elated when Tav shares their feelings with him.

He knows magic, but he doesn't know the world. He's clueless in certain areas. Despite being so knowledgeable and passionate about magic, he wants to know Tav. He doesn't care how intelligent or unintelligent you are, he only cares that you're a good person. I haven't finished his romance yet, but I've made some pretty silly decisions (like licking a dead spider) and he's still sticking by me. His desire for Tav isn't transactional at all. In fact, he'd probably find your question "what on earth could I even talk to him about without boring him to death" perplexing. The answer is anything! Gale's passion is learning and sharing knowledge, and if you talk to him about a subject he's already well versed in, he won't shut you down, he'll just match your enthusiasm. I'm playing as a wizard, and every time I've spoken to him about the Weave or books or anything my character knows as a result of her background, he gets excited, not bored.

Moreover, Gale's hobbies mainly consist of reading. That's it. He likes to sit on his balcony and read. I'm sure many people would consider that boring, and he knows it. That's why he gets agitated when you first meet him. He blatantly tells you his hobbies and everything he loves; reading, writing poetry, his cat, so when you ask him to elaborate or say "tell me the real you" he gets a bit defensive. He dodges the question about his past and anything regarding the orb, but he was also being 100% honest about who he is. He does love reading, he does write poetry, he does worship his cat, but that's all he really has going for him and he knows it's not substantial. At least not from his perspective. He's insecure.

Mystra was his entire life. He was secluded from childhood by a groomer and only had Tara and tutors on the side. Then he lived alone in his tower for over a year, fearing death, regretting his mistakes, and reevaluating his life. Companionship is literally the best thing you can offer Gale, because it's the only thing he truly wants. Even just a simple friendship means the world to him. Anything else you bring to the table is an absolute bonus. Don't forget, when you reach his maximum affinity he responds to your queries with, "Always a delight to speak with you."

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 tav #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep

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kimis-gloves · 1 month

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Runnin’ Home to You: Part 2 - read pt 1 & 2 on ao3

100 follower special!!

warnings: swearing, mostly fluffy plot and then they get it ON at the end, 18+/Mature Audiences. oral sex m!receiving, max speaking dutch😫

word count: 2681

Max and Charles stood there. Charles was lost in the depths of max’s eyes, unable to find any words to say to him in this moment.

“I’m sorry I came so late. I didn’t mean to disturb you this way.” Max forced out, still unable to piece together exactly what he was doing inside of Charles’s apartment.

As Charles guides them back to the couch, he’s wondering what max could be apologizing for. Max was more than perfect for Charles and Charles would open his door for max at any hour for any reason, even if it meant pushing aside his aching heart to help someone whoo was a friend first.

“It’s okay, max. I’m not upset that you came. I’m glad you chose to come here rather than doing something dumb.”

“I dont know where I went wrong with kelly. I thought everything was perfect. I gave her everything she wanted, but in reality, I guess she just wasn’t everything that I wanted.”

“What do you mean max?” Charles questions, he along with everyone else, was under the impression that Max and Kelly were the duo, together forever, through thick and thin.

“I mean, is she inst the person I love, she int the person I long for after a hard race or a long meeting? Shas not the one I crave to smile and laugh with. I don’t feel the way about her that I feel like I should. I messed up so bad by loving someone who I wasn’t in love with. I dont know what to do Charles. Im for certain the one I love doesn feel the same way, and it hurts so bad. All I want to do is to show him how much he means to me, but I’m afraid that doing so will destroy my bond with him.”

“He?” Charles muttered, not even meaning to as he was so caught off guard. Max Verstappen is in love with a man?

“Yes, he, Charles. Im in love with a man and he doesn love me back, big surprise!” max said with a forced laugh, which wasn’t a laugh at all. Charles could hear through the laugh. He could tell that max was struggling so he could only do what he does best.

“So tell me about him,” he mumbled, with so much care to hear who this mystery man is that has max on such a grasp.

“Wha- Oh. Him. Well, to put things short, he’s everything I wish I could be. To me, he is my definition of perfect. Every moment I spend with him is like coming up for air after almost drowning. When I’m with him, I’m truly myself and I don’t see myself being that way around anyone else. The way he stares at me when we’re side by side, the look of hope in his eyes, just begging for me to let him by one time, hoping for a chance at something..”

As max carried on, Charles began to wonder who this person could be, he almost starts to get jealous that this person has obtained so much of max, parts of max that Charles thought he would never see until his thoughts are cut short by something max says

“... And god does he look fucking stunning in red”

And that’s when it hit him. Max was in love with Charles, and Charles was in love with max.

–

When max saw how Charles looked at him after he accidentally blurted out a crucial part of Charles’s identity, he feels his breathing start to deepen and his heart race faster than he’s ever gone in his car.

“Well, he sounds like a catch,” Charles chuckles with a quick wink in max’s direction.

“Yeah.. he really is, I guess”

“So, what are you going to do about it? You can’t know for sure until you ask him yourself and honestly max? Youre amazing. You have the best qualities a person could have, personally and physically. He would have to be stupid to not feel the same way about you”

Max hasn’t noticed how close Charles really is to him. He can hear the soft sounds of air escaping from his nose. Charles’s silence is something he could drown in for an eternity.

“Max, you okay? Do you nee-”

That’s when it hits max. Charles was talking about himself, of course he was! How could he have not noticed all along, how perfect Charles was with accepting him into his home in the darkest hours of the morning. He cuts the blue-eyed darling off with something Charles finds to be unexpected from max, to be so upfront with what he wants.

Max cuts off Charles with a kiss, not as passionate as max had hoped but soft and delicate, enough to hopefully convince Charles to kiss him back.

And he does.

Charles cups his hands on max’s jawline, opening his lips ever so slightly to invite max in. max adds a touch of appreciation by embracing the kiss and tasting the freshness of Charles’s mouthwash. He can’t help to think to himself what kissing Charles would be like when his mouth tastes like max.

As they come back up for air, the heavy breathing and light pink flush on Charles’s cheeks drives max absolutely mad.

“That’s what I’m going to do about it,” max utters, barely over a whisper as he can’t believe he just kissed the love of his dreams, and he kissed him back.

–

He finally admitted it. Charles thought all along that he was just being delusional, or crazy. But he knew that the way max grabs onto his waist way too early for way too long for a podium photo, or the way max smiles and blushes while he’s spraying Charles with the champagne of winners. Even how he chooses to talk to Charles over everyone else when he has the chance to. It was so obvious, but everyone told Charles not to believe what he thought. Max enjoying the view as drips fall from Charles’s features a bit too much, looking more Charles than Charles ever has.

But max however, looks fucking amazing right now. Lips puffy and panting, cheeks covered in a mild blush, and looking at Charles like he might explode if he doesn’t kiss him again.

So he does. Charles goes back for the second kiss. More desperate than the first and both clinging onto each other with a deep need for each other on themselves. Max pushes Charles lightly to lie down on the couch, but Charles insists on taking max into his bedroom as he would rather not fuck his dream guy on something that would take impossibly long to clean up. He’d rather wash his sheets. Charles finds himself getting off track as he’s leading max down the long hallway towards his bedroom.

Max admires the art Charles has displayed on the walls, as he also noticed Charles’s beautiful piano in a separate room along the way, he’s wondering just how beautiful Charles would look spread out, bent over the thing he adores so much, but not nearly as much as he adores max.

As soon as they both step into the well-decorated room, of course Charles has better taste than I probably will ever have. Max is thinking to himself.

He’s standing shyly in the middle of Charles’ room as Charles, painfully slow, makes his way towards max, resting his hands on max’s broad muscles.

“Do you know how badly I’ve wanted to tell you how much you are to me,” Charles says, voice deep and rasped with desire.

“What do you mean?” max knows exactly what Charles means, he just wants him to say it so that it can be real.

“What I mean is, I have had my eyes on you for so long, our entire lives max. What I mean is I have watched you grow into who you are and I’ve only fallen harder and harder as times gone on. The amount of nights I’ve spent thinking about the way you touch me with what I was made to think was simple innocence, friendly rivals, was actually so much deeper, and that means more than anything to me right now. More than a championship, more than my seat at Ferrari. I will do absolutely everything to make sure you are loved every day and to protect you and our relationship. Whether that means pretending like nothing has changed in front of the media, I will do it because if it means I get to have these moments with you, then I will do it happy.”

“Charles, i don't know what to say or how to say what i want to”

“Dont say anything, just fucking kiss me right no-”

That was everything Charles needed. He didn’t need words from max to know he felt the same because the way max immediately grabbed onto Charles’s waist, the familiar touch feeling so much more intense right now than it ever has bin. It’s filled with need and want from max, almost as if he’s hoping to never let go of Charles for the remainder of his lifetime. His tongue diving deep into Charles’ mouth, tasting everything Charles had to offer as if it was his last meal. He quickly pushed Charles onto his bed, letting him get himself comfortable before putting his obviously larger body on top of Charles’s.

��Youre wearing too many clothes,” Charles demands

“Oh- Okay..” max stumbles back, balancing himself somehow on his legs, which felt like jello after hearing everything Charles had to say.

“We don’t need to do anything. I do not want to pressure you, but you should know I’m a virgin”

Max was surprised that he was shocked at his. He didn’t want to assume anything, but he had thought Charles would’ve used his beauty to his advantage by now.

“I was hoping someday, this.. Would happen. I guess I was right,” Charles said with that cheeky smile that always made max go crazy.

“Well lucky you charlie, I am too.”

“But I thought you and kelly-”

“Never, it never felt right to do it with her. But this?? This feels so fucking incredibly right, Charles. I can’t explain, i just need to show you..” and that he did as he quickly removed the remainder of his clothes. Charles finds himself staring in awe at max’s built figure. Broad shoulders and a perfect shape, thighs that could kill him if he wanted to. Max feels his desire as he mumbles.

“hall die eraf” - *take those off*

“English please, Maxie,” Charles giggles, but blushing at the sudden rasp max’s voice always has when he switches to dutch

“I said take those [clothes] off. I don’t like to repeat myself so I suggest you listen close, charlie.”

“Yes sir”

“Sir? Thats new,” Max hums

“Yes.. sir” Charles says in a more sultry tone, hoping to tease max as he drops his shirt off, leaving both in just their obviously sponsored boxers.

“Jij bent zo mooi charlie..” - you’re so beautiful

“Max.. I can’t understand you” Charles pouts as max takes a few steps closer to him, eyes roaming all over his lean but controlled figure. He really does look so beautiful like this, only for max too.

Max takes a moment to admire the Monegasque before he pulls him in for a deep kiss, this time not lasting long before max finds his hands trailing down Charles’s bare body, leaving soft but wet kisses along his jawline, smelling him in a way he never has before.

—

Before max could stop him, he found himself being pushed onto the bed by Charles, sitting as he watches Charles drop down to his knees, meeting the level of his thighs, he rests his head down on max’s thick thigh & max ruffles through his hair for a second before Charles starts to leave small kisses along max’s thighs, slowly leading up to where his boxers. Charles gives a max a look that speaks more languages than max can while he’s drunk. Max nods in allowment as Charles struggles to pull the tight boxers over max’s thighs and ass. Max’s already hard large cock springs out and Charles lets out a small gasp, in excitement and in worry as to how he’s going to fit all of the max inside of his mouth, let alone anywhere else..

Charles watches attentively as max’s cock leaks pre cum when Charles starts to lick the base of his cock.

“Charles, please don’t be a tease.. I promise we will have so much time to try things. I just want to feel you right now, please mijn liefje” - my love

“Yes, Max,” Charles spits as he takes Max's cock in his mouth. He sucks on his cherry red tip as he tastes the slightly salty taste of max’s pre cum in the back of his mouth. There’s nothing that tastes as good as max does, as well as there’s nothing that looks as good as max does. His breathing growing heavy as he takes in this fresh sensation that Charles was giving him.

“You taste so good, Maxie..” Charles hums before deciding he’s ready to attempt to fit max’s length in his mouth.

“You don’t have to take it all at once, i get it, its pret-”

“Youre so big, max, I fucking love it. I can’t wait to feel it stretch me out n fill me up with your cum” Charles says with a whine that leaves a chill up max’s back, worsening as Charles takes him in his mouth again, this time going deeper and deeper until he’s reached the slight fuzz of max’s cleaned up pubic hair. he smiles- or at least tries to when he feels the tickles against his face as he's mildly gagging on max’s cock, there's nothing that he could be doing right now that he would enjoy as much as this. he could live with max’s cock down his throat. After a moment of getting comfortable, Charles starts to move his head up & down along max, letting his dick lay flat and heavy on charles’ tongue. The more Charles starts to see how desperate Max is, the more he gives him.

“oh- fuck char- fuccckkk-“ max hisses as he cant even create a sentence when all he can think about is how fucking good charles feels on him.

Accidentally jerking his hips up, charles pulls off of him and continues to stroke his cock with his left hand and that's when max notices that charles has been jerking himself off this entire time, both are painfully hard for the other as charles gives max those doe eyes that drive him mad. It's not long before Charles goes back to sucking on Max's length when Max has to let him know that he's not gonna last much longer.

“charlie please, baby, i'm not gonna- hnnn- not gonna last much longer..” Max whines

Pausing for a second, charles says lewdly “please finish down my throat maxie, i need to taste every bit of you..” and with that max did. a warm surge of thick & sticky fluid runs down his throat and as charles swallows it max cant help but stare in awe at how almost innocent charles looks after he just fucked his dick like that. soon after charles finishes himself and finds himself laying with max, not a word said but they know by now that words aren't necessary. they already know.

“Cha-“

“Quiet max, please. Its 5 in the morning, im fucking spent. Get some rest and we will talk about all of this tomorrow”

“Alright, Goodnight Charlie”

“Goodnight max”

With that, they both drifted to sleep with limbs entwined with limbs. heart beats & low, synchronised breathing filled the room along with an aura of belonging. This is where Max wants to spend the rest of his life, with charles. vulnerable and raw. all will be complete in the world of max verstappen as he sleeps, unknown to what would happen when he woke up.

thank you so so much for 100 followers! i appreciate every one of you ❤️ i really hope you guys enjoyed this, i had fun writing it:) please lmk if you would like to see more of this duo & look out for new content soon!

likes, reblogs, comments & kudos on ao3 are always appreciated ❤️❤️❤️

- Alex

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blighted-lights · 2 months

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because of course im gonna ask: first aid? —cmofirstaid

(Based off of this post! TFP Soundwave, IDW Sunstreaker, IDW First Aid, IDW Ravage, and IDW Cosmos have all been asked for! Feel free to send in an ask for any character that isn't one of these five 🌸❗️Not limited to followers or mutuals, so go wild!)

First Impression: Oh shit, First Aid! I read MTMTE before I read most of IDW, and I was fucking stoked to see him appear in the Delphi arc- ESPECIALLY with how he was introduced with his report that doubled as the issue's intro narration. Aside from that, though, I didn't focus on him much during my first read-through. Pharma and Ambulon immediately stole the show away from him, and it wasn't until my second read a few months later that I really focused on Aid. Aside from being happy to see him, I LOVED how he was drawn in MTMTE. He's always been cute, but something with how he was drawn in the first half of MTMTE really cemented for me that he has one of the best designs. He somehow manages to be boxy and round at the same time and I love him for it.

Impression Now: You are ENTIERLY responsible for how much First Aid means to me now, I hope you know this. One of my top ten IDW faves. His design remains one of my favorites, and I wish we got more canon content digging into his POV of things pre-mutiny. I wish he stayed on the Lost Light instead of being called away, too! There is so much focus on Ratchet passing over the title of CMO to First Aid, but then Aid leaves so quickly after. Idk, I wish we just got to see him more pre-mutiny. Aid is such a tragic character to me but he's another background tragedy and it makes me want to shake my screen a bit when I think about him. A somewhat vaguely odd thing to say, but I wish we got to see more of First Aid's grief over Ambulon and his feelings towards Pharma. Honestly I wished we got to see more interactions between Aid and the rest of the medical cast in general- including Ratchet, Velocity (ESPECIALLY Lotty (is not biased)), and Rung.

Favorite Moment: Speaking of Pharma, my favorite moment of First Aid is this one right here:

I think Aid should be shown like this more often. I NEED him to be angry. I need him to be murderous. As a treat for myself. I hate the idea in media where the good guys refuse to kill a villain because they'd be "letting the villain win". It's good to see that narrative challenged by Aid here.

... Even if the consequences aren't easily forgotten.

Idea for a Story: Someone put First Aid and Rung into a therapy appointment, I need to pick their interactions apart under a microscope. I do not thing going to Rung would be able to help Aid. In fact, it might just make an already shitty situation worse. But I want to see First Aid sit down and talk about what he is experiencing. And maybe I want to see Rung unintentionally making his grieving process more difficult. We already know from Rung's own admission in Lost Light that he does not know who he is without his patients. He banks his entire identity and self-worth on trying to assist other people. But what happens when nothing he does seems to help First Aid, and therefore his own self-image begins to crumble for it? How does his own perceived failings affect his treatment of First Aid?

Unpopular Opinion: 🤔 Not sure if I have one. I'm allergic to the idea of Aid being really nice and nervous 100% of the time, ig. All things considered, the First Aid we have in IDW isn't nervous at all. But I don't actually know how prevalent this is in fandom or if this is even an unpopular take 🤷‍♂️.

Favorite Relationship: Canon-wise? It's a toss up between him and Ambulon and then him and Ratchet. It is devastating how hard Aid takes Ambulon's death, and his desperation to help save Ambulon when Ratchet wouldn't let him was heartbreaking to read. At the same time, I NEED more of First Aid and Ratchet arguing with each other and Aid calling Ratchet out on his bullshit. It is rare that anyone steps up to Ratchet like that and succeeds in affecting him. I would like more, thanks.

Non-canon relationships? Another toss-up between Velocity and Ravage. Put these three in a blunt rotation, I'm sure they'll be fine.

Favorite Headcanon: First Aid is extremely tactile. There is not a word or phrase that could properly describe how touchy First Aid is. He has the capability to turn someone who is touch-starved to touched-out in the span of thirty minutes. While this is in part due to just him being an affectionate person in general (or at the very least, more physically affectionate than most other Autobots), it is also partially because of his intense focus on Autobot brands. He is so used to checking everyone he comes across for their brands in the case that they might have a bullet shot through them that the process of checking someone over is compulsive. This extends to people who fall outside of the Autobot ranks who do not even have brands, like Ravage, Cyclonus, and Ten. It's earned him more than a few strange looks and awkward silences over the course of being on the Lost Light.

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literaphobe · 2 months

Note

who does adrien love more, ladybug or marinette?

HELLO ANON. i honestly love that u sent this. hard hitting potentially controversial questions are fun to me. i love analyzing and breaking down my writing and characters. also this is about tvl adrichat to anyone who’s seeing this <- im assuming so bc u sent it after I posted ch7

anyway, based on ch1-7, but also how tvl adrichat is in general, id say in simple terms, He Doesn’t Love One More Than The Other

in general, he thinks he shouldn’t be in love with either of them. ladybug, he sees as a door that’s been closed since jubilation. he turns that doorknob open, takes a peek every now and then, heart tightens at the sights he steals. but he’s been under the impression that they are Just Friends. he set that very boundary on his own, on multiple occasions, not to reject her—because ladybug never Properly came clean about being in love with him—but to remind himself that they weren’t a line he should cross. that is, until she revealed her plans and repressed desires to sleep with him. and then black and white swirled together to burn and blare flashing red sirens

and then as of right now in tvl, he’s falling into her arms but still sort of wary about everything he gets to enjoy. he’s afraid it’s too much and that she’ll realize that soon enough, can barely believe it’s still happening/has happened in the first place, and the indefinite nature of the situation is read as Temporary to him. it’s why he acts/acts out in bizarre ways, and tvl ladybug winds up accommodating him in ways she THINKS is sexual, but for him is usually deeply emotional

a part of him in still in denial. his plan from the get go was to not fall in love with ladybug again. he’s admitted several times to the readers that he thinks he’s doomed. but he hasn’t exactly crossed that final line, seen his tragedy for what it was -> he’s been in love with her from the start, and it’s only getting worse, the worst it’s ever been

SO. that brings me to tvl marinette. how does tvl adrichat’s love for her compare? as it has been alluded to/straight up mentioned on occasion across the chapters, tvl marinette broke up with tvl adrien years ago, but never properly explained to him why. they also remained friends, however awkward that was, best friends you could say, enduring high school and university and now they are even navigating working life together!! by literally having their jobs be intertwined. in ch7, it is implied that tvl adrichat hates his job. he mentions wanting to quit for more time with her on several occasions. undoubtedly though, he was also not being too serious, because actually going through with it would mean leaving marinette jobless

no, tvl adrichat isn’t over marinette. he doesn’t really think he is, especially before the events of tvl, and those first few years of their breakup. because he never received an explanation, the uncertainty of the whole situation, and the lack of space or boundaries they didn’t bother to establish in their friendship, a part of him just HOPED she’d change her mind, come around, and take him back. especially since all those years had her dating No One, and he followed suit because he wanted to be with her (and more importantly he just wasn’t interested in anyone else. his life oscillates between Bug Lady and Clumsy Girl)

random tidbit. in ch1 tvl adrichat mentions that he forgets everything that happens when he’s drunk, and this is why he was confused that tvl ladybug Remembered what happened to her when she was absolutely hammered. I’ll let u all make of that however u will

with tvl marinette, as seen in ch4, through adrien’s perspective GETS JEALOUS and appears somewhat into him still -> which is absolutely torturous and difficult because he’s well aware most of her confusing signals ARENT synonymous with wanting to date him again. she has this power and ability to turn his world topsy turvy that she isn’t fully aware of, and what she IS aware of makes her severely guilty

if his situation w ladybug is a closed door that creaks open from time to time, marinette is a house they’re still in together, but every time he sees her in a room, she walks into a different one. so, in conclusion, they both devastate him, and any time he’s with either of them, things aren’t easy on his heart in any sense at all

WHOOPS! poor guy!!

#ask #tvl #tvl ch7 #hi guys!!!!! thanks so much for the recent comments on the new chapter #so stoked to see people love it!!!#hoping more people get to catch up bc i really love hearing all ur thoughts!!!#also i hope this was an enjoyable analysis!!!!#feel free to ask me more questions about stuff ur curious about and want me to unpack!!!!!

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oh-for-fic-sake-library · 2 years

Text

A kept woman

Masterlist

Summary: August deserves a reward for all his hard work in the cia. He was on the front lines protecting the national security of the nation, so a little waitress wasnt too much to ask for.. was it?

Warnings: obsessive behaviour, dark!August, kidnapping, spying, swearing, hints at captivity/Stockholm syndrome, hint of bdsm, dark fic.

A/n: well what can i say? I tried to make a drabble below 1000 words, lost track of the wordcount and here we are 😅😅 i hope you enjoy a little ark auggie though~

Free the typos! Not beta read so please ignore the typos.

Wordcount: 1445 (nailed it 😅😅)

It was wrong, he shouldnt do it. But he had, and couldnt deny the sense of pride and excitment he had. He was the hero, the white knight who came barreling in to the scene with his polished shoes and 200 horse power to rescue the innocent princess from her fate.

Okay maybe it wasnt that pretty, and there was a chance you didnt feel rescued yet. But you would! He just had to get you home and tie you to something and explain a few things.

August sighed as you tried to scream through your gag again and kicked out at the back of his seat. Though he bearly felt it. One, this was a Bentley; a good quality car with sturdy padded seats. And two, noone can kick that hard with legs tied at the ankle, knee and thigh... god he hopes ou dont get rope burn, nothing would send him rabid then to see the red rope marks on your supple sking. The indents of a tight binding always made him a sexual savage, salivating at the sight of innocence bareing the twisted marks of rope.

He tried not to think about it. It'd do no good trying to calm his new kitten whilst having a raging hardon. Youd get the wrong impression and think he was going to rape you or somthing stupid. He loved you, he wouldnt hurt you; if anything you should be happy. Ecstatic even! Youd never have to work yourself to exhaustion again. Never worry about bills and rent or that disgusting lowlife youd paired up with. Youd live like a queen, august would give you a better life then anyone else. He wont hit you. He wont con you. He just wants to love you.

"Hush sweet girl, your fine, everything is going to be perfect you'll see. Im rescuing you" he uttered throwing a glance at you only to grunt, eyes locking on the plain soft looking panties that were now on display as your skirt was now tucked around your hips from you squirming. He gripped the steering wheel tighter making the leather creak.

"Oh look at you~ such a naughty little thing hmm? Is this really the time to be teasing me? When your helpless and scared? bratty? Honestly, you cant even wait until we get home?" He spoke without thinking, smirking and releasing a low growl as he repositioned his rear veiw mirror to drink in your delectable form. Only to shudder as another muffled cry came from your lips, and you wriggled your bottom trying to coax the skirt back over yourself again. the scene made his cock swell. His need for you had become too much.

"Come now little one hush, we are almost home. Everything will be better when we are home" he offered calmly trying to ignor the raor od blood in his ears as his body began toghtening. It was takjng everything in him not to stop the car and scoop you into hos arms and just hold you for a whole. He wanted to ease your panic and sooth you. To comfort you, he never wanted you to fear him. Respect, love and obey. But never fear.

You were the girlfriend... ex girlfriend of a low life with a growing pill habbit. Working all the hours under the sun just to feed your boyfriends habit. Not that you knew that, the scummy bastard ha been telling you the rent was going up. And up. And up. It hadnt, the boyfr;ex had been useing your hard earned money for pills.

But you being the innocent little girl you were trusted him and made sure to up your hours to provide and keep the shitty roof over your head. August had found it strange that you were at the little diner from 5am to 9pm almost everyday. He made sure to leave you bigger tips during his undercover surveillance of the phone box across the road used by the cartel that owned the seedy bar next to it.

He hadnt exactly minded sitting in the diner all day poseing as a accountant sippjng surprisingly decent coffee staring athis 'work laptop'. Especially when he'd done a background search on everyonenin the place. Youd stuck out like a sore thumb, hed expected to see bad grades, high school drop out little slapper with maybe one or two kids and a dead beat husband with a drink problem who refuses to work because of some made up injury he got ten years ago in the forces or some shit.

Instead he found a smart woman whod just had bad luck. Kicked out from her 'god fearing' purity police parents for having an iud. You had excellent grades a degree in business management; which you were pressured into by your god squad parents. But now was stuck in a dead end job, paying off student loans, keeping a roof over your head whislt trying to create a nest egg to pay for a spot on the wall of a local well to do art gallery in the city. Thats right, his polite little waistress was an artist, a sweet little painter. To say he was surprised you wasnt an aspiring influencer was an understatement.

It was when august saw your so called lover grasping you by the hair and shaking you violently behinde the juke box where he thought no one would see. Thatthe agent had taken more nottice of you. Your whimpers of fear and tiny yelps had moved him.

He'd watched closer, observes the bruises and grazes more carefully and made small talk. He'd sneered at anyone else who aproached him. He only wanted to be served by you. As the weeks went on he couldnt stop thinking about you and your situation. He could help. He needed to help you, protect you! If only youd ask him to. He'd sweep you up and carry you off into the night like a phantom.

He was well aware of his obsession, but he didnt care. Dreams of you by his side safe and happy. Greeting him at the door after a hards days work with a huge grin and random paint smugdges over your face whislt holding up your latest masterpiece for him to see. He wanted you, he wanted to keep you. You were to precious for him to ignore. You needed him, and he deserved you, after everything he has done for the country he deserved having a little wife waiting at home for him. And so he decided to claim his reward.

He made a studio for you, all the paints and brushes you could ever want! He cleared every single piece of art from his walls to encourage you to paint, he wanted you to fill his home with your art. And live a luxurious life of a kept woman.

August smiled as his home finally came into veiw. A large glass and dark wood monolith perched on a rocky outcrop over looking a large private lake completely claoked in twenty five acres of thick forrest. He had been particular about this place. This was off the record, his retirement plan with everything he could ever want, from gym to sauna, steam room to wine cellar, dungeon and spa, he even had a panic room and mini bunker two levels below ground built into the rock.

"Now now dont fuss, we are home love. Now lets get you settled." He preened as you cried louder when the world became dark as he pulled into the underground garage. August was quick to remote lock the garage, then without further ado he plucked you from the back seat and carried you off into the house.

It would take time before you came arohnd to him again, but once you were settled and had spent a few weeks here in your little studio and realised he will take care of everything and you had absolutely nothing to fret about youd love it. And thats when he can woo you. He estimated in around three months time youd happily follow him into the dungeon for some playtime. Untill then he will just have to be patient with you.

#henry cavill #cavillry #august walker x reader #august walker x you #august walker #oh for fic sake fics #dark fic

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darklinaforever · 25 days

Text

Yes of course... The show favors TB and Aegon II is not a rapist at all in the book ! This is something he will never do ! 🤪

The Greens trailer is longer than the TB one for fucking sake !

The TG is whitewashed to death in the series. It's just a fact. What good side of the Greens in the fucking book ?! How can you tell me you haven't read the book without telling me you haven't read the book, moron.

Alicent becomes a teenager pimped by her father to marry the king Viserys. Whereas in the book she is 18 years old and wanted to be queen !

Otto pretends to care about the kingdom like the big hypocrite he is with stupid pseudo phrases of wisdom !

Criston commits killing people by accident /loss of control now, instead of during a normal tournament or voluntarily !

Aemond is the victim of harassment, even though he is the harasser in the book !

Aegon II the rapist, has insecurities related to mom and dad !!!

The Greens / Alicent usurp a stupid fucking misunderstanding.

But apparently, no, they are not highlighted positively in the show...

And women are reduced to victim roles regardless of teams in general.

I know for a fact that Rhaenyra is the one who ordered Vaemond's death in the book, I even got excited about this change in several posts ! In the show, not just Rhaenyra, but all the female characters adapted suffer huge changes from their book counterparts to give the impression that they are kinder and wiser than the men.

Once again, the Rhaenyra case with Vaemond, or Alicent who wanted to be queen, and Rhaenys who was the one who wanted to make war with the Dragons and not basic Daemon. Thanks, I read the book. Maybe before coming to complain that I haven't read it you should find out about my publications on Fire and Blood in general ! No ? Before speaking without knowing. Dumbass.

I know that Aegon II did not rape a handmaiden named Dyana in the book. But you really believe that a man who groped the servants without their consent and slept with an 11 / 12 year old girl, therefore seen as a child in the GRRM universe, is not a rapist masked by pro Greens propaganda of text ?! Learn to fucking read !

Clearly this person should go fuck themselves. I'm tired of always having idiots coming to my inbox or my comments /reblogs !

I didn't even bother to respond to this person. I just blocked her. And what will await anyone who reblogs my posts to say this type of stupidity or sends me anonymous requests or comments.

Honestly, I don't give a damn about being polite anymore. Pro TG, anti TB, anti Daemon, anti Rhaenyra, anti Daemyra, all fuck off my blog.

@kittenfangirl20 @nrilliree @lizzie-queenofmeigas

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rxbelling-hxrald · 2 months

Text

// So, over the last several days I've tried a bunch of things to try and get something new going, memes, promo, calls, even the interest tracker a few weeks back and I received nothing at all, which kinda sucks and is demotivating honestly.

Sure if people are just plain not interested, cool, but I can't help but wonder if something is up with me? my writing or anything else. So I'm asking if there is some sorta issue you or anyone has in general with me, no judgements would be made, its just for my own sanity so I could potentially improve or at the very least gain a better understanding why no interest.

I won't lie, Im half tempted to just leave tumblr since many if not most of my older mutuals have gone in some capacity now and it lowkey feels like since I'm not part of some already involved group there's just no care/interest in interacting with me. There's no hate based on that thought either, you have the best fun with your best/close friends and mutuals after all. Its a fact. Just feels like the doors and windows to even try spreading are just sealed shut with no interest in most others to try branching outside their own group. At least that's my impression from my time on here over the years.

I apologize for the negative post but it really does feel like that right now, the ever so frequent 0 interest results across the board are just demotivating to me. To those that do still interact with me, know that your treasured and I appreciate you every second for the time spent together. You honestly have been my biggest sources of energy and caused countless smiles when I look at the dash. I've made some good friends on here and I'd like to still keep that contact if possible.

Right now its looking more likely Ill leave and stick to discord if people wanna still chat or RP there. But I dunno, maybe I just need a break? Im just not seeing the likelihood of change however which again is why I fully invite people to be brutally honest with me. If I upset people in some form or you found me boring, whatever the reason if any, I'd love to know it. I prefer harsh truth to silence. You don't learn otherwise.

Thanks for reading through this ramble. Ill stop now. For the time being I'm pausing everything, since im unsure if ill continue or not.

#OOC #Mun Talks #Feedback #Negative Ramble #Mobile

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artistic-intrxvert · 1 year

Note

The rottmnt turtles ( hopefully not too much) with this preteen (like 12?) reader who’s just sneaking around and watching them “defeat crime” and writing it down, basically describing them as “cool” and just wanting to be friends with them. With drawings of them and the turtles. Also they try really REALLY hard to not get caught because they seriously do not want them to see their “notes”. Also 2012 tmnt honestly brings me to tears sometimes so I’m gonna give rottmnt a chance-

Hello there! YOU ARE MY FIRST ROTTMNT ASK AAA IM SO EXCITED :D i have a serious hyper fixation on this show and i need help hahah- I had a lot of fun doing this and I hope you enjoy!

Warnings: None! (Some swearing but i do that a lot so it's not really all that different lol)

Prompt: (PLATONIC!!)Rise!Donnie, Leo, Raph, and Mikey with a child!reader who admires them

Donnie

I feel like Donnie would be the first to notice, and at first he wouldn’t really care all that much

In fact I think he’d respect that, if one needs notes about something then one needs notes

Pretty cocky about it too, why wouldn’t one want to know about the glorious and most intelligent turtle Othello Von Ryan?

But at the same time he also is quite suspicious of you and makes sure to keep an eye out in case you try and tell anyone of the turtle brothers existence

Honestly takes too long debating whether or not to tell his brothers

One day they all spot you taking your notes, Donnie knew a little bit about it since he has his high grade tech (he has his goggles after all, he probably knows your writing down something)

Let’s say they tried to confront you, wondering why and how the heck you managed to get on the top of one of the buildings and if you were in any danger

Yeah let’s just say you got scared and fled the scene leaving your notes behind

Donnie was the one that took it, claiming he can read any hand writing and wanted to make sure it didn’t have any personal information that could be used against them

I’m reality, he was quite curious to see what you were writing down

Turns out, you were doodling the turtles and yourself all in a picture with the classic ✨sun in the corner✨ and at the top said “friends” but he could see that it was erased and rewritten a few different times, as if you were hesitating to write it

He flipped through the pages and were impressed with how much notes you got that were accurate considering the fact you've been watching from a distance

While one would find it creepy, he can’t really hold it against you, children have people they admire and look up to and it just so happens that he and his brothers are the ones you look up to

Definitely tried to return the notebook, successfully spotting you in your usual spot, searching for your beloved notes

He talks to you, asking about you and how he’s intrigued by your notes (he's very impressed but would never admit that out loud)

He asks if you would like to meet his brothers and maybe ask about some stuff to help your notes so that he can make sure you "have the right information"

He's still his cocky self, but I think he'd understand where your coming from

We don't don't about his obsession with atomic lass-

Leo

SO. FUCKING. COCKY.

When he saw you taking notes from a distance every time that he and his brothers went out to do patrolling, he'd notice you being around the first few times or so, assuming you lived around that area

But then he noticed that you always seemed to be wherever they were

At one point, it hit his skull that you were following them

Only difference is that if he somehow found out before Donnie (highly unlikely btw) he'd point it out almost immediately

He would just kinda be like, "is it just me, or does this kid seem to following us?"

The others would notice too and agree to try and see if you were following them

Upon being confronted you tried to explain something but we're too nervous and ran off, leaving your notebook behind

Donnie was about to snatch it when he did, claiming he was going to read it first before Donnie hogged it to himself

He flipped through the pages and saw the drawing you did

Honestly thought it was creepy at first but then realized that you just wanted to be friends and looked up to them

Leo is the greatest ninja the world has ever seen, so it would make sense why you would want to be friends with him and his sidekicks brothers IM SORRY I HAD TO QUOTE THE MOVIE AND I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T HAVE BUT I COULDN'T HELP IT-

I feel like at some point he'd confront you it would be the day after he found the notebook you left behind and he would give it back and ask you about what kind of hobbies you do and what inspired you to watch him and his brothers

I think that he would eventually start talking to you often and eventually invite you to the lair sometimes. You would basically be a really close to of his

I think overall he'd be very smug and cocky about it but would deep down be honored that you would choose them to be the ones you look up to

Raph

Raph would probably be one of the ones that doesn't notice this until someone else points it out. I also think he could also be the one to see it first. It just depends

Raph would be so honored that you looked up to them, he'd notice you following them and would go out of his way to offer you a smile before they'd go back to the lair

One day you leave your notebook alone after an encounter and he notices you dropped it

He wouldn't go through it surprisingly

One of his brothers would get to it first and would go through it, meaning he'd had to try and get them to stop invading privacy

Once he gets a glance, however, he feels so touched at the drawing you did and the detailed notes you've written down

He may not be the best at understanding complicated notes, but he knew how much thought and accuracy went into writing them down

Raph would try his best to return the notebook to you the next time they went out to fight bad guys

When he does return it, he places his hand on your head and ruffles your hair (if you don't have very long hair [shaved or buzzed] or if you have no hair at all, he'd give you a head pat)

He'd encourage you to ask them anything if you had questions, but would lightly scold you about being out and about at night by yourself

As long as you were safe about it, you may have just found yourself a new friend AND a kind of parental figure

Mikey

LOVES. YOU. SO. MUCH. (Platonically, of course)

He wouldn't notice at all, it was definitely pointed out by one of his brothers

He'd be a little worries about you being alone in New York by yourself given how you look to be around 12 or so

He'd confront you after a few different times they'd notice you, advising you to not be out so late

You didn't listen like the little shit you are

Eventually, they all had noticed and tried to confront you about it since they were rather curious

The pressure of talking to the turtles you looked up to had to a little nervous and you took off before they could talk to you

You did, however leave your notebook behind

Mikey looked through the different notes and flipped until he saw the drawing

He thought it was the cutest thing ever! He loved drawing and art related things himself, so he was really excited to see that you liked to draw as well!

When he finally saw you again, he handed you the notebook and offered to lend you some art materials or to sometime draw with him

It would take time to get him to invite you to the lair, but it would eventually become a very frequent thing

Very flattered but also very excited about the drawing

Sorry that this was finished so late :( life has been annoying as hell and making me not have motivation or the time to write as much as i used to. Nonetheless, I am very slowly getting back into the swing of things. Hope you have an amazing rest of your day/night and remember to drink your water <3

-artistic-intrxvert

#rottmnt #rottmnt x reader #idk what else 2 tag this as #i want sleep #if you can read this your gay🫵#🕺🏼#its platonic

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herorkgk · 9 months

Note

Now I'm curious. What's YOUR favorite OW2 skin??

i'll do you one better, here's my fave skins (that i own) for all the heroes

i opened up my game for this, if anyone reads through this good luck im sorry.

d.va - shin-ryeong

i can't even begin to describe why i love this skin so much but my fave part of it is the candles on her cannons

doomfist - saitama

fun fact i became the very thing i hate for this skin (doomfist player)

junkerqueen - zeus

i literally do not care this is her best skin and nothing that could come out for her will EVER be as good as this

orisa - reindeer

another case of they can never make something for her as good as this

ramattra - poseidon

honestly again. ik he doesn't have many but its just. how can they top this? i'm very into greek mythology so this event was really awesome for me tbh

reinhardt - cardboard i've wanted this skin ever since ow1 btdubs bc my fave spray for him was always him as a kid trick or treating with cardboard armour and i wanted him to have a cardboard skin so bad. when they came out with it i caved... it was just everything i ever wanted

roadhog - pachimari

i do not play roadhog.

sigma - maestro

i like scuba too bc of his rock hard abs but this one is just so unique

winston - werewolf

i also do not play winston but i love werewolves and i got this in a lootbox once

wrecking ball - horizon

i don't play this stupid thing but i like lore skins

zarya - totally 80's

DONT CAREEEEE best zarya skin

ashe - little red

this has been the staple ashe skin for me. ashe has a lot. a LOT of really good s tier skins and i think she has the most best skins out of other characters aside from like. tracer and genji.

bastion - coffin

bird is a freaking skeleton. best skin

cassidy - riverboat

i've been wearing blackwatch lately and i keep losing so i think its a skin issue. going back to tried n true

echo - kkachi

she's actually the cutest

genji - genos

i really like one punch man....

hanzo - casual

i remember the controversy over this skin back in the day it was so funny how grandpa they made him look. i think i like this one the most on hanzo bc i just like him as a character. i also like how this skin is him finally just being himself and in a subtle way showing how he's grown into himself as a person. means a lot to me

junkrat - dr. junkenstein

DONT CAREEEEEEEE BEST SKIN IN THE ENTIRE GAME NEXT!!!!!!

mei - jiangshi

best mei skin ik melon exists but be serious

pharah - orbital

pharah has a bunch of good ones too but i can't help loving her being bald

reaper - lü bu

best reaper skin. do not care

sojourn - cyber detective

people who pretend sojourn has no good skins are delusional this is peak

soldier 76 - grillmaster

do i need to say more. i will this was the first skin i ever worked really hard for in ow1. when i started playing again i grinded for days to get enough coins to get the full set golf swing pose, highlight intro and skin. i prayed i would get it in lootboxes but i never did so i worked really hard for this. corny but it means a lot to me, that was probably the most fun i ever had playing this stupid game

sombra - face changer

i wear bride a lot too but nothing can beat face changer. imo this is one of the top 10 skins in the game if i was rating them. i love the mythology, i love the colour palette, i love the animations as the face changes, i love that you can see which face she is currently wearing on her gun in real time. its a really impressive skin

symmetra - oasis

best sym skin its so elegant and pretty and cunty

torbjorn - cybjorn

kraft mac n cheese.....

tracer - comic book

i loveeeeee this one the panels from london calling.... eats this skin

widowmaker - ange de la mort

as a widow main this skin makes me hot

ana - night owl

goth bird. best skin

baptiste - funky

dude i will never not love this skin the custom music when you select it and the gun colours. groovy

i've hit my pic limit unfortunately i will need to rb and finish the rest

#.answered #i'm so sorry you've activated a neuron in me and i've become the most annoying person to my followers

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leorawright · 1 year

Note

Hellooo, I am here to try and make up for that angst and replace it with the funny

S/o, a respected and feared person throughout the base, suddenly has an injury on their arm and go to get it fixed by medic, but not before all the mercs start conspiracy theories about how someone as terrifying as s/o could have possibly gotten hurt. (Im thinking s/o is just straight up so good at fighting and dodging they never get hurt during battle)

So then s/o gets healed and all is well, but then they approach one of the mercs in private and tell the them the reason, and it's something that they could straight up never see them doing, like idk, ballet.

Basically it's the whole;

"Why are you telling me this?"

"*evil smile* Because no one will ever believe you."

Idk I'm bored and just feel like I'm in a silly goofy mood, have a good day and make sure you're hydrating mate! :)

Thats so adorable actually *this felt really repetitive so I cut out some of the mercs

Mercs finding out their terrifying s/o does ballet

Scout

He's honestly not surprised someone like you does ballet

Why? Because the ballet industry is hard-core and terrifying

So therefore he's very impressed you've been able to continue doing ballet all these years in an industry that tough

Demoman

When you tell him he begs to be able to see you dance

He doesn't care if no one else will believe him he wants to see you dance

And honestly he just adds this to your personality

Like: terrifying, good at fighting, does ballet

Sniper

He's certainly surprised to figure out you do ballet

But after he reads about it he realizes that the industry is just as tough as you are

Also how do you find enough time in your schedule to do ballet?

Spy

He knew it! He'd had a suspicion after seeing point shoes in your closet and now it's confirmed

He doesn't care about telling anyone after all it's obviously your secret

He's always had a back thought about doing ballet but after learning about the industry from you he decides maybe not

#tf2 x reader #tf2 sniper x reader #tf2 scout x reader #tf2 demoman x reader #tf2 spy x reader

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27-royal-teas · 1 year

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YET !!! ANOTHER ANALYSIS!! And for good reason this time because people keep misinterpreting Pete’s work to be about Mikey and it makes me fucking PISSED can you not let pete have one thing in his goddamn life i get it its fine to have headcanons and opinions but PLEASE for the love of god please stop discrediting all of his hard work & good writing to be about a white boy he fucked back in ‘05 this CONSTANTLY happens with poc artists and it makes me mad to no end

yep, that’s right. today we’re talking about I Am My Own Muse. writing this essay i have listened to it a grand total of twenty three times

i like this song a lot specifically because i do kind of relate to it a lot frequently i feel like smashing a guitar until i go insane but i dont have a guitar and i dont know how to play one regardless so. uh yeah

The thing about IAMOM is that it’s saying that in the TITLE. Hes his own muse. And obviously no one can take that away. sure , some of his songs might be inspired by someone, but in the long run, who do they come from? pete. romance songs might not be about anyone in particular. I know ive wrote songs that could be interpreted as romance, but they’re actually me talking to my younger self or my future self or my friend, and the point is, even though songs written by pete may seem like they were about someone that doesnt mean they are and you cant, you CANNOT discredit the fact that he is his own muse. just like the song title says.

The song begins with a BANGING orchestral arrangement. I think the intro to IAMOM is my favorite song intro on the album. It's just very well thought out and clearly carefully planned, and quite honestly I think patrick did an AMAZING job and I'd love to see him do a breakdown of the composition here because I am IMPRESSED. Not even to mention the vocals, he is on FIRE. anyway in the rest of this essay I’ll be interpreting the lyrics and tying them back to the central topic i just opened with: How Pete Is His Own Muse.

The first verse is quiet, and it begins like this:

“Here i am, not sure you should take a chance

I like playing dumb, letting you figure me out

But i was faded in my own defense

So drop a bomb on the things we dreamed about”

I feel as though this verse is very clear. He isnt sure that the person he’s referring to should take a chance on him, should think that he is worth it, and he likes being able to be up to someone else’s interpretation with no outside influence. i do this frequently with strangers- i stay quiet so that they can make up their own idea in their head about me. They can figure me out themself, since i clearly cant figure myself out, and i think that’s the idea pete is really aiming for here. ‘So drop a bomb on all the things we dream about” can be referring to himself or someone else, but here let’s take it in the context that he’s discussing himself. This line is repeated in the second verse, so it’s clearly one of the main points that needed to be stated here; here he is saying to himself that (again, it’s that self sabotage) he should give it up, give it all up, it’s not worth it, destroy it all, drop a bomb on all our dreams because they aren’t going to happen. Taken together with the previous lines we can basically say that pete is saying that because he is leaving himself open to interpretation from the public, the things he truly meant to say are lost. And i think that’s the main thing here, especially with the title, and obviously im doing it myself, maybe this isnt what he meant at all, but i definitely do think it correlates along those lines to some degree.

The chorus is repeated several times throughout the song (3 times to be specific) and it goes like this:

“Smash all the guitars ‘til we see all the stars

Oh got to throw this year away

We got to throw this year away like

A bad luck charm”

And then that repeats twice.

I think i can safely say everyone reading this right now has gone through the pandemic. I assume three year olds dont go on tumblr. The entire smfs album references 2020 and 2019 time and time again, most critically in What A Time To Be Alive, and it’s heavily present in this song too. “Got to throw this year away (like a bad luck charm)” vocalizes the wishes of pete and everyone else who wishes to cut those years out of their brains- pete has expressed in interviews how taxing the pandemic really was on his mental health, and i think that “smash all the guitars” could symbolize the frustration and pain he really felt in that time; destroying music (one of the main things he loves) until he can sink into that despair and just float away (“‘til we see all the stars”). Another way this can be interpreted is an act of rebellion (a lot of musical artists smash their guitars during shows, cough ryan ross cough) but i dont really think that that makes as much sense in this context.

The next verse:

“The trumpets bring the angels but they never came

No one let them in ‘cause they didnt know my name

I know i keep my feelings so tucked away

Just another day spent hoping we dont fall apart

So drop a bomb on all the things we dreamed about”

Another very pete based verse (BECAUSE HE IS HIS OWN MUSE). This kind of links to Heaven’s Gate because it’s related to the same thing- not making it on the list, not feeling worthy of getting into heaven, because this sort of self deprecation is reflected throughout most of Fall Out Boy’s albums. I could give a million examples of this, but I don’t want to be here forever. “The trumpets bring the angels but they never came/ no one let them in ‘cause they didn’t know my name” sort of brings to mind the image of a person waiting to be carried away to something they’re not entirely sure they deserve, and they’re proven correct because no one ever came to carry them away, no one ever decided that they’d be on the list to get to heaven and the angels just went marching past and pete can hear their horns, know theyre there for people who deserve heaven much more than he does. How sad is that?

“I know i keep my feelings so tucked away/ just another day spent hoping we dont fall apart” carries the feeling of not wanting to be a burden with every emotion thought and expressed, even the good ones, and ‘we’ can be referring to himself, every single aspect of himself, hoping he doesn’t fall apart into shards of the stars his guitar is made up of. and then of course it’s the line about the bomb again, although this time it feels even more internalized and personal because it’s the second time he said it, and he dreams of getting into heaven but how can he make it up there if the angels themselves know he does not deserve to and so. drop a bomb on all the things we dreamed about, folks, because they aren’t going to happen.

The bridge:

“So let’s twist the knife again, twist the knife again

like we did last summer

So let’s twist the knife again, twist the knife again

Oh, i’m just trying to keep it together

But it gets a little harder when it never gets better I'm trying

To keep it together, to keep it together, oh”

To me this entire bridge just feels really deeply confessional and personal. Im going to start at the bottom because i like it the best.

He’s trying. He’s trying so damn hard- to be optimistic, to be hopeful and stay full of happiness and love but it’s SO HARD when there’s no light at the end of the tunnel to motivate him. This is still talking about quarantine, i think; i remember i was in middle school at the time; they said that we would be back in two weeks. I remember i was grateful to get a break and time off. Then two weeks turned into two years and it got really, really hard to see an end to the pandemic. When things stop improving it gets harder and harder to keep it together when you can’t see the results of any of your actions, when you’re trying your best but it still gets you nowhere. Wouldn’t you stop trying? i know i would.

And let’s talk about “let’s twist the knife” just a little bit. “Last summer” might refer to the last album release, which is Mania (even though it was released in January). Another album cycle, another twist of the knife; another bit of words that pete has to pull out of himself like ribbons, and although he loves it, that’s his job, it still feels like dredging up all the pain again. So let’s twist the knife again, dig it in just a little deeper, just like we did before.

So, yeah. Pete is his own muse and i truly do think that that is heavily reflected in this song, even this whole album. A lot of songs in smfs seem more him-centered, because he is the writer and he is talking about himself. So Good Right Now and What A Time To Be Alive are especially good examples of this.

And the interesting thing about the title is that it’s pulled from a Frida Kahlo quote, which goes like this:

“I am my own muse. I am the subject I know best. I am the subject I want to better.”

And isn’t that just it? This whole album, it’s an album of self discovery and going back to your roots and staying current anyway. It’s patrick pulling pete out of his funk and getting him back in the game; it’s an exploration of a new style, a new fall out boy. And like a phoenix, every album they rise again, still the same but somehow completely brand new. The orchestral arrangements displayed in IAMOM and SMFS and LFTOS showcase this, the new feeling but still the same, something bettered, and I’m really, really happy with how far they’ve come not only in their expansion of music but also with themselves. And I feel like this song and this title- I Am My Own Muse- is really a stand up, it’s a show of how far they’ve come. Because they are the subject they know the best.

#Toby speaks #Toby’s meta #fall out boy #fob #pete wentz #patrick stump #andy hurley #joe trohman #fob meta #meta #lyric analysis

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doomed-era · 2 months

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hey so this may be. A Question. but how would gaffen + widget + maybe the champions react to undertale/deltarunes characters. sorry for undertaling you </3 . also anything on the champions descendants?

OKAY here i go. finally. im gonna limit it to gaffen/widget unless I can think of a funny interaction between undertale characters and the champions I think solely bc there are a lot of them...these are gonna be fairly superficial and based on first impressions don't think too hard about them </3 cause theyre kinda bad

honestly they'd collectively be very weirded out by monsters that can actually speak to them. widget and daruk would definitely try to work things out and yknow. not try to kill anyone while given the first sign of violence gaffen might start attacking everyone. so my first thought is. they are probably better off sticking together in this scenario because of gaffen. and tbf it's not like widget wouldn't be suspicious either, she would be less than friendly at first, especially if she learned how monsters got into the underground. she'd immediately start wondering why and paint humans as the victims who must have had a good reason to do such a thing. idk i'll go in the order of a neutral route

flowey: i'll be honest they would not like flowey...which is HORRIBLE ik. I imagined them trying to beat him up and them him resetting which!!! I do not blame him. if they knew more about him I don't think gaffen would be sympathetic and urbosa would just be pissed. however. mipha probably would reconsider. widget would be all like DONT LOSE HOPE THERE MUST BE ANOTHER WAY!!! revali going "tch I would do cooler things if I could reset everyone" would be funny i admit but smhhh

toriel: ok I admit I think urbosa would be like "shes such a soft mom geez." (baka.) if gaffen wasnt in work mode he'd want to make puns with her and eat her pies....in the meantime he will stare soulfully at her. if toriel read widget facts about snails then widget would be fascinated im ngl she would stay in the ruins with toriel if this was an actual undertale route. however I think they are just taking a tour so whagever

sans: widget would be a bit startled by his jokes! also I think sans would realize that shes like, a PRIME target for them. gaffen and sans would get into a staring contest and gaffen would lose because sans has no eyelids. or does he

explain this toby fox!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

papyrus: oh you bet widget and papyrus would get along. immediate best buds. gaffen would look at papyrus like he was insane (his eyes are bloodshot from skeleton staring contest) revali being all are you AWARE of how GULLIBLE you both ARE would be funny and mipha immediately jumping to widget and papyrus's defenses would be super funny

undyne: urbosa being like UM. I am FAR less of a show off than you are. you must serve your kingdom with grace. and then they get into a suplexing contest. daruk also joins but he's like oh haha i'm doing this for fun :) while undyne and urbosa are giving it their all. widget is cheering for urbosa obviously and gaffen is a last-minute contestant. widget cheers even harder for urbosa. im not sure who would win but it's not gaffen. also urbosa thinks it was super funny. also mipha would be fascinated by the echo flowers + have a lot of fun swimming around in waterfall. heartbroken by onion-san and tells her all about zora's domain </3

alphys: im going off my immediate first thought so honestly widget asking what anime is and alphys freaking out about it at first and widget being like OH NO WHAT DO I DO. mipha being like...tell me about this...anime...also widget would think mettaton is really cool. revali might like it but he would not express interest at first. and then he would criticize the sequel to mew mew kissy cutie along with alphys really passionately (iirc??? I forgot which one she didnt like) gaffen is eating instant ramen noodles straight out of the package when no one is looking. also if widget knew about the true lab she'd be like well um its fine ??? you did what you could ig wouldnt think of it as bad at all. which. erm. widget. urbosa would complain that her and daruk cant fit in the elevators and criticize asgore's city planning

asgore: yeah speaking of him. idk I think theyd like him. especially if they've heard a lot of good things on their way over. im imagining them all sitting down for tea...widget might be a little skeptical. and would also definitely figure out that him and toriel are divorced and ask intrusive questions about it. if this was deltarun id say asgore might be a little more interested in talking to gaffen I think he would see a bit of resemblance between gaffen and kris, mostly just quiet + weird + :| face I think. gaffen would just be quietly intimidated I think

OKAY. i'll do deltarune ones cos im kinda enjoying this

kris: ok honestly I cant even imagine kris would want to interact with them. widget would track them down and kris would just leeeeaaave

susie: widget immediately thinking susie is horrible and awful and susie responding in kind by being susie-er is funny to me. she would think widgets relationship with the champions and gaffen is super weird I think, but would she say this? idk.

berdly: ...yeah this is one of the reasons I wanted to answer this ask. I just. revali and berdly...I dont think theyd get along at all I think they'd see the worst aspects of themselves in each other and hate each other </3

uhh I think that is enough for me. for Now. but. yea

champions descendants is fairly complicated so uh if you wanted to send me another ask abt it so I could answer it separately...pleas...

#glider rambles #asks #im still pretty tired but I hope you enjoy #also everyone gives hathy a kiss

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silkjade · 6 months

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the 4.2 archon quest was so good, i loved it, the story unfolded so beautifully, the characters were created with so much love, it's left me feeling so wistful and even a bit melancholy, i know it's going to haunt me for a couple days but overall i really loved the direction they went with this, what an amazing end to this story ♡

(spoilers under the cut)

I've defended furina ever since 4.0 against that whole 'neuvi is the real archon' crowd (who were SO annoying btw even after it was revealed he is the hydro sovereign) and my adoration of her has NEVER wavered because she is just a girl ! and she's doing her best ! && her character is BEAUTIFUL because she's just a girl, a human ! who has single handedly carried this burden (which wasn't even hers to begin with btw) alone for 500 years—putting on a mask everyday just to play the part of the archon, suffering in silence... & on the other hand, focalors, her divine counterpart, too worked tirelessly for the sake of justice, so she could sacrifice herself to fool the heavenly principles, and return neuvillette's authority

This whole arc had me in tears because it's so, "give me back my girlhood, it was mine first." I'm honestly so happy how it ended with furina leaving to live her own life, as she should ! she's free ! after working so hard for so long... like she did not waver once, not even when presented the chance, not even to the traveler in her own head. (& i loved this btw because i feel like all the other aqs we've kind of been 'the exception' with the archons) (also looking back, the whole plan to trap her and put her on trial was pretty cruel, though i dn't blame anyone cus no one knew at the time) but i was so so happy to read the other archons' new voicelines about furina, because even they recognized her dedication and perseverance and strength

&& a shoutout to navia who is so beautiful and strong and she's lost her father and now silver + melus... their love and devotion to her literally had me in tears within the first like 5 minutes of the aq. Like the two oceanids protecting her !!!! they were already in the collective consciousness but were still defending her literally til the end, literally in death. rare npcs that i care abt 'n cried for + i really thought they were gonna come back at the end but they didn't like they actually DIED ?? idk me personally i think mayb furina's second story quest will bring the dissolved ppl back mayb idk but i'm manifesting, ik we're def not done with fontaine yet so give navia her family back !

&& also i loved that for once, we are not against the fatui. for a while now i've been under the impression that the fatui might not be as bad as we're made to think they are at first, cus obviously everything is not black and white. im normally pretty whatevs abt childe but he's so silly for fighting the whale for like a month & then unintentionally saving the day whilst dissing neuvi with that thumbs down at the same time HAHAHA

ok i think that's it for now, i just really loved this archon quest. sumeru and fontaine really set the bar so high and i hope hoyo keeps this standard when we go to natlan as well. the overall story just keeps getting more 'n more interesting as we go and i'm honestly so excited cus we're learning sm yet there's also still so much we don't know ahhhhhhh !!!

#𝓰𝓮𝓷𝓼𝓱𝓲𝓷: 𝓂𝒶𝓎 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓌𝒾𝓃𝒹𝓈 𝒷𝓁𝑒𝓈𝓈 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝓉𝓇𝒶𝓋𝑒𝓁𝓈 #hehe if u read under the cut notice how the first & last pics are like the beginning & end of a bow #genshin impact 4.2

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homiro · 7 months

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WARNING FOR LONG POST THAT WON'T GO UNDER A BREAK. FLICK IT UP OR SCROLL PAST IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ A MESSY FUCKING RANT ABOUT FANDOM BEHAVIOUR, ABUSE, TRANSPHOBIA, ANTI RADICAL FEMINISM AND MORE SHIT. THIS IS NOT COHERENT.

I have two hangster fanfics started but I don't feel like finishing them especially because I just keep writing and writing and making them longer and longer and like if I ever finish either of them I won't even leave the comments open if i post them and I probably would post but yeah the last piece of shit i wrote was met with nothing but insults and animosity so im like still very angry about that. like the least horrible of the THREE assholes who decided that insulting me was something they had the right to do instead of just saying 'your tags are wrong, fix them' tried to go on about oh you leave comments open so you're open to criticism uwu and girl criticism is basically tearing someone to shreds so if i don't want your damn critiques what makes you think that I want to be insulted? where did i say that i had a degradation kink? so yeah, i have a very bad impression of this fanbase. it seems very clique-y to me and it's funny because it's a minuscule fanbase no matter what this user tried to say I'm not stupid and making a single fanfic a series to crank up the number of fics isn't as sleek as yall think it is. like you can do it i'm not judging but don't tell me 'um akshully this is a super popular shipppp' like yeah within a fandom with maybe 1000 active users maybe lol and I'm just in a I want to fucking speak up about EVERYTHING mood and I'm tired of always being shut down, lectured, insulted, and treated like shit and expected to just be 'the bigger person' motherfucker no. i am 166cm tall that's 5'6'' or some shit I don't know american, that's not very big is my point so i won't be the bigger person and ignore and delete and blah blah. WRITING IS MY HOBBY AND WHEN YOU COME FOR IT, FOR THE THING THAT HAS KEPT ME MILDLY SANE SINCE I WAS FUCKING 7, WE HAVE A PROBLEM. no, i don't care that i write like shit. it's free. i do it for free because i like to do it. it's the only way i can express myself and even there i get shut down and mocked because im mediocre in everything i fucking do, thanks for the reminder, it's not like my abuser didn't remind me of that for well over 20 years lol /sarcasm/ if you don't like someone's shitty writing, you have the option to click the fuck back and not being a massive piece of entitled shit. i don't know what's wrong with this fanbase honestly i have gotten hate before but never this fast and never to this scale on a stupid fucking fanfic that was very fucking clear for anyone who had taken the time to read it before telling an abuse survivor what abuse is and absolutely getting it fucking wrong lol i am proficient in 7 languages, and my preferred writing style is simple because i understand the value of being understood for more than one reason.

why do people think it's acceptable to be cunts to strangers online? if you wouldn't say the shit you say to people online to people in real life, THEN DON'T FUCKING SAY IT. and yes, i would say all of this here in real life and that is why I am typing it down. i'm literally a chronically depressed dysphoric motherfucker with generalised anxiety, cptsd and semi-functional autism, you think i wouldn't lash the fuck out in real life? you're wrong. i'm actually much worse in real life. i'm the sweetest fucking pie if you respect me but if you treat me like shit expect to get the dressing down of your fucking life or punched in the nose because sometimes i become non-verbal when angry and that's bad because i am reactive to abuse. and online that translates to not shutting up, in real life it translates to violence. but the thing is that in real life people are aware of dos and don'ts. online people just become their fucking regina george wet dream of a school bully.

and i've had fucking enough of being treated like shit. i've had enough of people thinking that being a cunt is cool or edgy. i've had fucking enough of the yes queen slay culture that sees women displaying disgusting, abusive behaviour and applauds it as something good. because 'socking it to the men'. i hate radical feminists for this reason and it's funny that their fascist ideology is spreading like a disease and nobody seems to notice, especially because the pipeline from radical feminist to trans exclusionary radical feminist is an archway not a pipeline. before you know it, you'll see trans masculine people and trans men as 'traitors' and 'wanting male privilege' and 'still women deep down' and 'still has a vagina so she's a woman'. and i'm not pulling this out of my ass, i watched this happening in real time more than once. god i'm so fucking angry i'm just vomiting all the shit that's been pissing me off for months. and i'm talking about this because this shit is so prevalent and commonplace that i, who have been sure that I want to go through with fully transitioning, have been reconsidering because of the insidious hateful comments from terfs/radfems and casual sympathisers with the ideology of those people and the dysphoria i've been feeling has been making me want to wear an actual literal mask outside and carry a fucking fake sword in a scabbard so that nobody will approach me. i have isolation tendencies that are very strong and have been with me since i can remember and i can remember as far back as 4 years old. and then i have to see these fuckers try to find 'articles' to support their hatred and bigotry when they are the literal reason why we fucking kill ourselves and just put up with feeling miserable and don't transition. i don't want to be even more ostracised and treated like shit. i don't want to be even more treated like i'm holding an unpinned grenade just because i don't want to put up with people who insult me and make me feel bad and react to that and fight back. i don't have self-esteem, i fucking hate myself, i feel like ripping my body to shreds every damn day and then i have to work from home the shitty jobs i can do that barely pay for my meds and definitely don't pay for therapy because being around people and too much stimuli makes me shutdown like to the point where i can't speak. So you see the issue maybe idfk that I come online to unwind and write shit as a hobby and mind my damn business and take the time to say look I have these issues and people see that list as 'oh look an easy target for my being a cunt wet dreams because this one will react and I'll seem like a saint! UWU'

and why did this have to involve this ship from top gun? well, because i liked the ship, i wanted to write for it, because writing is my hobby, and what i got was abuse lol and then gaslit into thinking it wasn't abuse and that i had to accept being called names lol 'oh there are no victims uwu i will concede that insulting you was not very nice uwu' but i didn't get a single fucking apology i had to apologise because i was triggered since i couldn't actually do anything and im always ALWAYS on my own even if i cry for help, it never comes, no matter what's fucking happening. even friends just say oh well i didn't see that so oopsie daisy sorry you felt bad and nobody defended you as as been the norm your entire life' like i'm just fucking TIRED. i'm tired of never being good enough. im tired of my friends never having my back. i'm tired of only being told oh actually you weren't wrong when it's already over and i'm already feeling like shit mentally and can't cope with the ruminating feelings of being perpetually misunderstood, mediocre, and alone. 'oh having to stand up for yourself makes you stronger uwu' fuck you a million fucking times. no it doesn't. it makes you paranoid, it makes you isolate, it makes it hard for you to maintain friendships, it makes you a loner, it makes you depressed because you're not supposed to be alone because humans are social animals. and i guess that's the bottom line lol i feel utterly and completely fucking alone. the only person i regularly see and talk to is my brother who also has cptsd and is autistic like me lol obviously we grew up in the same shitty environment and these things tend to be hereditary so yeah i have to mask even with him because he's almost 11 years younger than me and is going through that early 20s phase of your life where you're just lost and don't know what you want and feel bad and as the older sibling i feel that it's my duty to try and pretend not to feel as bad as i do but it's getting harder and harder and im not putting this under a read more break. happy fucking mental health awareness day. enjoy your nothingburger posters and yellow pins of performativity.

rant over.

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